#and i never want mitch to leave but if the day ever comes when he does there are going to be a lot of people who realize they fucked up

[eyes-above--the-waves]

Last year, Mitch Marner was literally leading the LEAGUE in Playoff points after the 1st round and people were still like 'who cares, he never shows up when it matters' (because that series didn't matter, I guess?), and now this year he hasn't scored yet and people are mad at him and saying he's useless so like...it doesn't actually matter how he performs. He could score a hatty while standing on his head and people would still complain that he only scored 3 goals so what's the point? I don't blame Mitch at all for saying he doesn't listen to outside voices. The outside voices are shit.

[watermelonsugacry]

Y/n applying lotion on his torso..!

It would be last minute..and he would run to her and be like

‘Be quick’

NO BC THIS IS THE DOMESTIC SHIT THAT GOES ON ALL THE TIME WHEN THEY'RE ON TOUR TOGETHER

Ever since the couple has arrived to their hotel room, YN has been bugging him about applying sunscreen to his torso. Especially now more than ever since he chooses to basically go topless on stage (she'll never complain about that) while playing in an outdoor venue in Barcelona.

The first time she brought it up was in their hotel bathroom. Harry, fresh out of the shower with nothing but a towel hanging low on his hips, was busy untangling the necklaces around his neck when his wife comes into the room. She holds the bottle out to him with a suggestive tone and a raise of her brow.

He stands frozen for a second, eyeing the sunscreen with a contemplative hum before decidedly shaking his head.

"M'good, baby. Thank you."

She narrows her gaze at him, flickering her eyes from the bottle to her husband, before saying, "M'gonna bring it anyways."

YN turns on her heel but before she can fully leave the room, he reaches over and smacks the underside of her bum just to hear her squeak. He chuckles to himself when he sees her hand peek back into the room to show her middle finger at him.

The next time she brings up the sunscreen, is when he's doing a sound check later that day.

She watches from the sidelines, perched on top of an equipment box as she sits in on Harry and the Love Band rehearse before the show tonight. The yellow sunnies sitting on her face help block some of the glare from the bruiting sun reflecting from the massive stage. Everyone has the same idea along with shorts and some type of short sleeve top for their attire.

As much as YN loves to watch Harry in a white tank top, black Ray Bands, and a clip securing his curls on the top of his head, she wants nothing more than to sooth his tan skin with a protective layer of SPF.

While Harry talks some things over with Pauli and the horns ensemble, YN perks up when Sarah waves her over.

Harry's eyes flick over to his wife up on the platform with his drummer, helping apply lotion to the top of Sarah's back before going back to his conversation.

Soon enough, YN's offering sunscreen help to the rest of the band like a mom at a soccer game. Even Mitch rubs some over his arms while YN dollops a blob on his nose. Everyone happily accepts her offer...well, almost everyone.

When the band rehearses Grapejuice, Harry waltz up to where his wife sits as he sings, "There's never been someone else so perfect for me."

When she waggles the bottle in his face, he gives her a cheeky smile, playfully grabbing and tossing the bottle to the side. Before she can even get one word out in protest, he tugs her off her seat and pulls her in close as he sings.

She tries to pull away as he brings them to the middle of the stage, but his grip on her is strong.

His high notes go wobbly as he giggles, watching as YN gives up her efforts to escape. Eventually, she succumbs to his swaying and lopsided smile and slow dances with her husband for the rest of the song.

The last time she brings up the sunscreen is in his dressing room. And this time around, she doesn't ask.

Harry is already dressed for the stage and was busy tying his shoe laces when his wife's heels come into view. Not even a second later, so does that damn sunscreen bottle.

"Put it on."

"M'fine. I don't need it." Harry tries to reason. "It's gonna be night time when I'm performing out there anyways."

He holds back the temptation to smile at her stubborn look but he knows that'll only make her frustrated. But given that the cute pinch in her brow is already there, he guesses there's no point in trying to hide his smirk.

Plus, it's really hard to not already have a pleased expression at the sight of her in a silk blue dress that was only waiting to be taken off of her body by the end of the night.

"I don't care. Put on the fookin' lotion."

"No."

"Your chest has been red since the last show."

"You look beautiful."

"You're getting sunburned!"

"No m'not."

Before he can get another out, YN presses the pad of her index finger into the a spot by the one of the shallows tattooed on his chest and he hisses at the sting from his inflamed skin. He bats her hand away and notices how the yellow imprint from her finger slowly fades back to red. Despite the clear indication that she's right, he still doesn't say anything.

Even married, he can't let go of his pride to being wrong to his love. He's denied her of her help all day that it would only embarrass him and make him look bad if he gives in now.

Knowing this herself, YN tucks her lips in with a shrug. She places the bottle on the vanity and decides to leave the matter alone. She tried, and if he needs to have aloe vera be applied to his skin when it begins to peel, well, he could do that himself.

Despite how frustrated, irritated or upset the two might be at each other before a show, they're never ones of break their traditional pre-show ritual.

She cups his face and presses a short kiss to her husband's lips.

"Have fun out there. You're gonna do great. I love you."

His mouth opens to say something, anything, as she turns to walk out the room, but no words come out. Instead, he's left to finish getting ready with the icky feeling of guilt settling in and that damn bottle staring back at him.

Before the show starts, YN and her manager, Jenny, walk backstage to get to their designated spot in the pit for family and friends. She turns her head to the sound of feet hitting the pavement and a call of her name.

She furrows her brows when she sees Jeff and her husband running up to her, his cropped blue vest in hand instead of on his torso.

"What's wrong? Everything alright?" YN's voice is laced with concern given that he's supposed to be moments away from being on stage.

"Be quick." He pants out of breath. She's confused for a moment at what he could possibly mean. It's when she looks at what he's shoved in her hand that it finally clicks. She's quickly popping the cap off the bottle and squirting some lotion in the palm of her hand. After handing the sunscreen to her manager, she rubs her hands together before lathering up his torso, his abs, his chest--anywhere she can cover.

"Aw did you have to put on a little sunny-screen because your mummy told you to?" Jeff teases in a baby voice before breaking out in a laugh, only to receive a slap on the arm from Jenny.

YN doesn't even hit him back with a witty comment. Too smug, smiley and occupied with smoothing the lotion over her husband's broad shoulders and down his arms to care. So much so, that she doesn't even notice when Lloyd takes a few quick pictures of the couple before running off to take his place on stage.

She rubs the remaining bits of lotion over the apples of his cheeks, his t-zone, and his nose before taking hold of his face to plant a sweet kiss on his lips.

"Okay, yeh all set."

He shakes his head at the smugness written all over her beautiful features. It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone how he always folds for her in the end, no matter how strong headed both of them are.

"You're lucky I love you."

"Please, you're the lucky one."

"Damn right I am," He grins at her giggle as he pulls her back in for another kiss. Too enthroned and stupidly in love with this woman, he doesn't think twice about cupping her cheek with one hand while his arm circles around her waist, deepening what was supposed to be a short and sweet kiss.

"Um, H?" Jeff calls after a moment. "You got a show to do, remember?"

"Mhm, yeah." Harry mumbles out of the corner of his mouth to not completely break the kiss, fully enclosing himself around his wife while her arms go around his neck. "Be there in a sec."

Jenny's back is the the couple, her hands clasped together as she looks up at the ceiling to give them their privacy. She already knows that its best to just let them be than trying to break them apart; for Harry's shows anyway. But when it comes for her singer, she's hustling YN to be on stage, ready to perform, and on time.

Jeff on the other hand is looking down the empty hallway, anxiously looking at the watch on his wrist before scratching at his brow. He spares a glance at the two with a pained expression.

"You Love Birds need to go on a second honeymoon or some something, you horny fucks."

"Way ahead of you, Jeffery."

Harry give a lopsided grin at YN's words, pressing another smearing kiss to her lips. The two weeks they used for their honeymoon back in January was barely enough time for anything before having to go back on their respected world tours. With both of their show numbers decreasing by the week, the married couple plans to go MIA for a very long time: drinking wine at their private villa in Italy, walking along the shore at their getaway beach house in Malibu, tangled under the sheets in their bedroom in France.

From their spot backstage, they can hear the field full of fans begin to scream in excitement as the intro video plays. Desperate, Jeff turns to the wife for some complacency. "Mrs. Styles? Unless you want your husband to be out of a job in the next 60 seconds?"

YN pulls away with a smile, biting her lip as her husband looks down at her like he's one kiss away from canceling the show.

"Think of me when you're out there." She closes her eyes when he bumps their foreheads together, nearly melting when he rubs their noses together; a soft and loving gesture despite the dirty thoughts swimming in his head.

"Always." Harry answers easily, bringing her hand to his lips and presses a kiss to the rock on her finger.

With a new sense of spunk and pump to be on stage, Harry throws a sly wink to his wife before maneuvering around her and walks towards the stage. YN's eyes linger on his back muscles as he lifts his arms in the air, looping them through the arm holes in his cropped vest.

His words are cheeky and light as he says over his shoulder, "You coming, Jeffery?"

.

SINCE 2010 masterlist

taglist:

@ashtongivesmebutterflies @cacapeepee @harianaswhore @gxbiqs @mvaldez7821 @yourfavplayboybunny @drewrry @thurhomish @roseke @majasophieanna @lilfreakjez @rach2699 @renatavieira

[misshoneyimhome]

can we get some brothers best friend action with will?

where reader is mitch marner’s twin sister, and for as long as every one can remember, william and reader have always silently swooned and liked one another, and constantly blatantly flirted with each other. but reader had a long-term boyfriend, who might i add is/was super toxic and she physically couldn’t break up with him in fear he’d hurt her… so when they eventually did break up after he had done something bad to her, she ran to will’s apartment, not knowing who else to go to.

“No, I’m not leaving you like this.” Will

“Just tell me what you want.” Will

“I want you.” Reader

Absolutely, we can! Well, at least I hope we can 💓

I tried to portray your idea, but I wasn't sure if I made it too heavy 😅 I'm typically not into darker themes, but I found my thoughts naturally drifting in that direction 💓😉

If there was meant to be more of a smutty undertone, please let me know - I believe there could be a continuation, but I didn't feel it would mesh well with the dramatic scene 😉

Tropes & warnings; friends to lovers; mild abusive!boyfriend, toxic relationship; language, hurt emotions; happy ending, I promise!

Word count; 3.1K

Taglist; @couldawouldashoulda50, @findapenny

➼｡ﾟ

Storm & Thunder - “No, I’m not leaving you like this!” I William Nylander

For as far back as anyone could recall, there's been an undeniable connection between you and William Nylander. Growing up as Mitch Marner's twin sister, your life was closely linked to his from the early days of being drafted. And ever since the chemistry between you and William was unmistakable, simmering quietly beneath the surface like a promise yet to be fulfilled.

It all started innocently enough, with playful teasing and banter exchanged during family dinners and time spent in the hockey community. Initially, you were just friends; William saw you as nothing more than his good friend’s sister, and you were happy with that. However, as time passed, something changed between you, developing into a deeper, more significant bond.

It was in the stolen glances across crowded rooms, the gentle touches when passing each other in the hallway of the training arena or after games, and the way your heart would skip a beat whenever he flashed his trademark smirk at you.

And you knew you weren't alone in sensing the magnetic attraction between you. William's gaze lingered a fraction longer than necessary, his smile slightly softer when directed at you. Though neither of you dared to articulate your feelings, the truth was apparent in the way your bodies drew closer together, pulled by an invisible force that seemed to strengthen with each passing day.

Even your friends and family couldn't deny the vibe. They shared knowing glances whenever you and William were in the same room, nudging each other with sly smiles as if to say, "I knew it."

But despite the undeniable chemistry and the encouragement from those around you, something held you back—a silent agreement that neither of you dared to break. Maybe it was the fear of messing up a good thing, or perhaps it was the uncertainty of what lay beyond the boundaries of your friendship. Mitch had never outright forbidden you from dating his teammates, but there was a lingering sense of loyalty, a feeling that taking things further with William might upset the delicate balance of your relationships.

So, you and William circled around each other, caught in a never-ending game of cat and mouse where the stakes were higher than either of you cared to admit.

Timing, in particular, had never been on your side.

Despite the undeniable connection between you and William, there was one unsurmountable obstacle standing in the way - your boyfriend, Marc, who cast a dark shadow over your life.

At first, Marc seemed like a dream come true. As the true gentleman he was, he showered you with attention, affection, and gifts, making you feel incredibly fortunate. The sex between you was nothing but amazing and intense, dare you say, almost addictive. And his presence in your life gradually expanded, until it felt like he was a permanent fixture in your small studio apartment.

However, as time passed, his once-charming facade began to crack. He became possessive, demanding, and controlling, suffocating you with his actions and leaving scars deeper than any physical wound could. You weren’t allowed to socialise freely with your friends, your work hours were restricted to 9-5, and attending hockey games was only permitted on weekends, if at all.

You attempted to break free from his grip numerous times, but each effort only seemed to tighten the chains that bound you to him. Marc wielded power over you with precision, manipulating your emotions and exploiting your vulnerabilities until you felt unworthy of anything better.

He was a skilled manipulator, a true narcissist who thrived on exerting dominance over you, leaving you feeling powerless and isolated in your suffering.

You weren’t entirely naïve, though. Deep down, you did recognise your own worth. You knew you deserved love, respect, and care. Yet, the fear of Marc's anger, his violent outbursts, and the harsh words he directed at you, kept you ensnared in a cycle of psychological abuse and manipulation.

The thought of what he might do if you tried to break free, of the repercussions that would surely follow if you dared to defy him, was unbearable. So, you remained, trapped in a prison of your own creation, suffocating under the weight of a love that had turned toxic long ago. And as days melted into weeks, and weeks into months, you began to lose hope that you would ever find a way to escape his grasp and reclaim your life.

Yet, even in the darkest moments, amid the suffocating despair, there was a glimmer of hope—a lifeline that you clung to with all your strength. And that lifeline came in the form of William Nylander, the Swedish figure who had always seen beyond the façade you'd constructed around yourself and into the depths of your true self.

He understood the truth, perhaps better than anyone else. Not even Mitch, your own twin, could grasp the extent of your suffering, but William did. He noticed the faint bruises beneath your sleeves, the forced smiles that failed to reach your eyes, and the way you flinched at the slightest unexpected noise. Although Marc had never physically harmed you, his tendency to grab onto you had left marks on your arms.

"Try and leave him, y/n/n – we’re all here for you," William would gently urge you, his voice a comforting salve to your wounded spirit, fully aware that leaving wasn't an easy choice for you to make.

"I-I can't, Willy," you'd sob, tears choking your voice as you sought refuge in his embrace, your heart burdened with the dread of what awaited you at home.

William grasped the complexities of your predicament and proceeded with caution, never pushing you beyond your boundaries but always offering steadfast support.

Through every tear and every outburst, he remained by your side, a guiding light in the darkness threatening to engulf you. His mere presence dispelled the shadows, reminding you that you weren't alone in your struggles. 

Though you struggled to articulate your gratitude, he didn't need to hear the words. His deeds spoke volumes, a silent vow that he would never desert you, no matter how fierce the storm raged around you.

And as days turned into weeks, you found solace in William's companionship, seeking refuge in the warmth of his embrace and the security of his apartment nearly every day. With Marc increasingly absent, claiming to be preoccupied with his newfound interest in golf with his co-workers – or so he called her – your time with William became more frequent and precious. You even managed to spend more time at the Ford Performance Center and the Scotiabank Arena along with the rest of the players and friends.

In those moments, surrounded by his laughter and the camaraderie of the team, you experienced a peace that had long eluded you. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you could smile without the weight of the world pressing down on you, laugh without fearing retaliation, and simply be yourself without the suffocating presence of your toxic boyfriend looming over you.

It felt liberating. It felt like the right path. And as you snuggled closer to William on his spacious sofa one evening, his reassuring presence soothing your tired soul, you dared to believe that perhaps, just perhaps, there was hope for a brighter tomorrow.

-

However, the next night, everything collapsed like a house of cards.

It began like any other disagreement, a petty argument over insignificant matters that somehow escalated into a full-blown confrontation. How it had started was a blur, lost in the fog of anger and frustration that clouded your mind. But as the voices grew louder, so did the intensity of your emotions.

Marc's accusations struck deep, his words piercing your heart like daggers. He blamed you for spending too much time with the Maple Leafs and their partners, alleging that your passion for hockey was abnormal and unhealthy. But you knew the truth. He was simply envious of your brother's success, resentful of the bond you shared with Mitch, and the happiness you derived from supporting him at the arena where you had spent countless years together.

And in that moment, something within you snapped. Years of suppressed frustration and bitterness erupted to the surface, igniting a tempest of emotions that threatened to engulf you both. You couldn't stand by and allow him to diminish the one thing that brought you happiness, the one thing that had been a constant source of comfort and support throughout your life.

With tears streaming down your cheeks and your heart pounding in your chest, you found yourself standing up to him in a way you never thought possible. It was as if you had grown wings, emboldened by his words and fuelled by a newfound sense of defiance. You refused to let him dictate the terms of your life any longer, to control what brought you joy and fulfilment.

In a voice filled with determination, you shouted back at him, each word echoing like a battle cry against the tyranny of his dominance. Though your hands trembled, and your knees threatened to give way, you stood your ground, unwilling to yield in the face of his aggression.

For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you felt a glimmer of hope kindle within you, a beacon of light in the darkness that had threatened to consume you.

“Why the fuck do you even care, Marc? You're always at work, with your colleagues, or with some other whore you've picked up! You don't even love me; you don't even want to fuck me! Why can't you just leave me alone? I don't want you in my life! You're not some gift from God to the wor-"

And then it happened. Like a bolt of lightning, as the words poured from your lips, fuelled by years of pent-up frustration and resentment, Marc silenced you with a swift, forceful slap across your cheek.

The sting was sharp, cutting through your skin like a hot iron. Your hand instinctively rose to cradle the tender flesh, the red mark a painful testament to the violence just inflicted upon you. Tears streamed down your cheeks unchecked, your eyes swollen and puffy as the reality of the situation began to sink in.

The room descended into silence, as the only sound was the distant hum of the city beyond. You stood frozen, unable to move as shock and fear gripped you in their icy hold. Your mind screamed at you to flee, to escape the danger lurking in his gaze, but your body remained rooted to the spot.

Then, you noticed it—the spark of something sinister igniting in his eyes, a predatory glint that sent a chill down your spine. And suddenly instinct took over, adrenaline flooding your veins as your heart raced in your chest. Without hesitation, you turned and ran.

The fight-or-flight response kicked in, and in that moment, flight was your only recourse. Your feet pounded against the pavement, carrying you forward with a speed you didn't know you possessed. You had to get away, to break free from the toxic and perilous situation that had ensnared you for too long.

And as you vanished into the night, seeking refuge from the tempest raging both inside and out, you knew there was only one place you could go: to William's.

You knew you must have looked a sight: eyes swollen and puffy, tears still tracing down one cheek, the other flushed red from Marc's blow. Rain had soaked your hair, leaving it a tangled mess against your face, while your sweater clung damply to your body. Even your homey sandals couldn't escape the rain, their socks sodden from your frantic escape.

The train journey dragged on, each stop feeling like an eternity. Anxiety gripped you tighter with every passing moment, your mind overrun with a whirlwind of thoughts and fears. You couldn't help but keep checking over your shoulder, heart pounding with the dread of Marc following you.

And upon arriving at your destination, you wasted no time, hastening towards the familiar safety of William's apartment building. Fortunately, the guard recognised you despite your dishevelled state, offering a sympathetic smile as he opened the door, though you were too consumed by your turmoil to acknowledge his kindness.

Breathless and trembling, you rode the lift to the upper floor, each second feeling like an eternity as your heart continued to race in your chest. The journey blurred by, your mind struggling to process the night's events and the enormity of what had just occurred.

And finally, you stood before William's door, your hand hesitating for a moment before instinct propelled you to knock softly against the wood. As you waited for him to answer, a single plea echoed in your mind: please, let him be home.

"Y/n? Shit, what's happened?" William's voice was filled with concern as he swung the door open, taking in your dishevelled appearance. "Fuck, come in."

But you were frozen, your body unable to respond as the realisation dawned that you might finally be safe, yet still unable to shake off the shock.

And William sensed the gravity of the situation, approaching you with cautious steps, mindful not to startle you further. He stood calmly, giving you the space, you needed to ease out of the grip of the adrenaline rush.

Words caught in your throat, the weight of the ordeal bearing down on you heavily. You wanted to explain, to recount the nightmare that had unfolded, but fear and uncertainty barricaded your words. Yet, as you stood there, trembling and teetering on the edge of collapse, William's reassuring presence began to seep into your core, offering the comfort you so desperately needed.

"It's... Marc," you managed to choke out, tears once again streaming down your cheeks. "He— he hurt me..."

The words hung in the air, the truth settling heavily between you like a dark cloud. In that moment, William's expression transformed, a mix of anger and concern contorting his features.

"What?" he exclaimed sharply, his eyes flashing with fury. "He hit you?"

"Yes... I'm... I'm sorry... I didn't know... where else to go..." you whispered.

William felt a fire ignite within him at the revelation, a fierce protectiveness washing over him as he fought the urge to seek retribution against the man who had dared to lay a hand on you. But he knew that now wasn't the time for vengeance. Now was the time to comfort you, to ensure your safety and well-being above all else.

So, with gentle motions, he wrapped an arm around you and slowly guided you into his condo, his presence a comforting shield against the turmoil. Seating you on the sofa, he enveloped you in his embrace, his touch offering solace amidst the chaos.

Though familiar with such scenarios, tonight felt weightier than usual. Your boyfriend's actions had crossed a line, and it was time for decisive action. William simply couldn't bear seeing you in such distress any longer. You, whom he loved so deeply, deserved nothing but happiness. And he was determined to see that you received it.

And with every passing second, his soft whispered reassurances began to ease the tension, as he draped a blanket over your shoulders, and you felt a warmth spreading through you.

However, as you sat there, enveloped in the comforting silence, guilt gnawed at your insides like a relentless beast.

"I'm so sorry, Willy... I-I didn't mean to ruin your evening," you spoke softly, regret tingeing your voice.

"Hey, you're not ruining anything," William replied, his tone tender and reassuring, yet you couldn't bring yourself to meet his gaze.

"Yes, I am... I'm always just intruding on your life with all my problems," you sighed heavily, the weight of your burdens pressing down on you. "You should just leave me alone, Willy... I'm just 50 shades of fucked up..."

"No, I'm not leaving you like this," William interjected firmly, his voice brooking no argument.

"Please, I don't want to be a burden to you anymore..." you pleaded, your voice tinged with desperation, a bit louder this time.

"Then what do you want?" William asked, his gaze unwavering as he searched your face for answers.

"I-I don't know..." you admitted, feeling lost and uncertain amidst your turmoil.

"Come on, y/n, just tell me what you want," William urged, his voice a steady anchor in the storm of your emotions.

And then, in a moment of raw vulnerability, the words spilled from your lips without hesitation.

"I want you," you confessed, your voice stronger than a whisper, finally meeting his gaze.

"You have me... You've always had," William replied softly, meeting your eyes with unwavering sincerity.

"No, I want to be with you, Willy..."

In that moment, as your eyes locked, a wave of comfort washed over you, a sense of peace settling over your troubled soul like a gentle caress.

You had finally vocalised what you'd been longing to say for so long, the ties with your boyfriend holding you back now severed. But now, you were free. And your first act of freedom was to express to William how deeply you desired him.

"I'm sorry... I just... I know I've been nothing but a burden to you all these years," you confessed, attempting a half-smile. "But... I've always... I've always been in love with you... I guess I've just never... been able to say it... out loud."

It was a tremendous relief, and you felt the weight lift from your shoulders. And as much as joy stirred within you, William too released a sigh he'd been holding onto for years.

"I'm in love with you too, y/n... I always have been," he revealed, flashing you a tender smile, before he gently leaned his forehead against yours, his hand tenderly caressing your cheek. "I love you so much, and all I want is for you to be happy."

Drawing back slightly, you locked eyes with his deep ocean blue gaze. "You make me happy, Willy... You always have," you exhaled softly. And with the floodgates open, you couldn't contain the emotions any longer. "You've always been there for me... and I can't put into words how much it's meant... you're my soulmate..."

William offered you a wider smile, his lips drawing closer to yours. "And you're mine..."

It was the moment you'd yearned for, and now, after an evening filled with thunder and heartache, the universe had healed the wounds and guided you to where you truly belonged: with William Nylander. And as your lips met in a tender kiss, sharing the warmth of your breath, you knew without a doubt that you had finally come home.

[lcandothisallday]

auston leaving the arena and noticing you and your friends waiting outside to meet the players or sum and he’s literally like love at first sight and starts flirting and gets ur number 😭 lmao for us realistic toronto girlies obvs - ⛽️

hehe obvs😋❤️ thanks for feeding into my delusions🥰 Auston Matthews x f!reader

You stood next to your friends, your hands in your jacket pocket as you shivered from the cold. It was near the start of the season and the weather in Toronto was getting colder by the day--fitting for the sport, but not for you as you stood outside the arena in hopes of meeting the players.

"Guys--I don't know if it's worth it anymore--"

"Y/N I don't think you get it," your friend Emily started. "If I don't meet Mitch Marner before I go back to BC--I'm gonna dig my own grave," she said with such seriousness in her voice--yet her teeth were also chattering from the cold. Emily had moved to BC soon after she got her masters and she was only back in town for a little bit for her mom's birthday and to watch the game.

She was a huge fan to say the least. Growing up watching the NHL and even playing for her local girls team. Unlike you--you had only got into it recently, never having that same influence while growing up.

"You can't reason with a girl in love," your other friend Olivia mused with a laugh. You merely roll your eyes and dig your hands further into your pocket.

"I just don't think they're gonna come ou--oh my god," you breath our, your jaw dropping as you see two men resembling Mitch and Auston in the distance coming out of a back door.

"Oh my God!!" Emily screeched, jumping up and down. "Miiiitchhh!"

Mitch being the ever sweet golden retriever he is, excitedly walked over while Auston begrudgingly dragged behind him with a sigh. He was tired, his body aching from a harsh slam he took and all he wanted was to grab dinner with Mitch at their favourite restaurant before going home and collapsing into his bed with Felix by his side.

Mitch with a wide smile, approached Emily, feeding off of her excitement as he spoke to her and entertained her with a selfie.

Meanwhile, Auston was about to let out an annoyed breath when his eyes wandered over to you, unable to tear his gaze away. He was captivated by your beauty, your warmth radiating even in the chilly evening air. As Mitch continued chatting with Emily, Auston excused himself, making his way toward you where you stood off to the side watching your friends interact.

"So you're not a fan of Mitchy's?" he teased in question playfully, causing your eyes to widen in panic.

"Oh no I--I am!" you stutter in defence, your cheeks burning up at the accusation. "I'm just a new fan and didn't wanna seem like...a fake one," you admit bashfully, looking away.

Auston smirked, his confidence radiating off of him as he watched you squirm. If he was honest, he thought it was adorable and he loved how sincere you sounded.

"You didn't grow up with the game I'm assuming?" he asked, wanting to know more about you.

"Yeah...my parents are from a hot country...hockey is probably the last sport they'd be interested in," you say with a laugh. "So that's why my knowledge is limited."

He laughed and gave you a slight nod. "Well, you don't have to worry about that with me," Auston replied, leaning casually against the wall next to you. "I won't judge you for being a new fan. In fact, I think it's great that you're getting into the sport."

You couldn't help but feel a mix of nervousness and excitement as Auston continued to flirt with you. His charming smile and the way he effortlessly carried himself made it hard for you to resist his charm.

"Thanks," you replied, trying to hide your growing smile. "You're a lot more cute in person," you breathed out, your cheeks heating up immensely at your admission.

Auston's smirk widened, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "Oh, so now we're moving on to compliments, huh?" he teased, his voice laced with playful sarcasm. "Well, I have to say, you're not so bad yourself. Actually, you're more than just cute. You're downright stunning."

Your heart fluttered at his words, a blush spreading across your cheeks. You had never expected Auston Matthews, a professional hockey player and known heartthrob, to flirt with you so openly. It was an exhilarating feeling, and you found yourself getting caught up in the moment.

As you go to respond, Mitch walks over and interrupts. "Hey--I made the rounds. We can go now."

You reluctantly tore your gaze away from Auston, feeling a mix of disappointment and anticipation for what could have been. Mitch's interruption reminded you that this encounter was likely just a fleeting moment, and you had to make the most of it.

"It was nice meeting you," you smiled.

Mitch looked between the two of you with an amused smirk and a raised eyebrow, catching on to the flirty tension. "Wait--aren't you gonna introduce me to your new friend?" he teased.

At that, Auston's eyes widened. "Shit--I never caught your name," he pointed out with a bashful smile. Mitch rolled his eyes dramatically.

"Y/N," you giggled in response.

"Did you at least get her number?" Mitch asked, Auston shaking his head no. "Dude! It's like you have no game!"

"I was working on it!" Auston exclaimed.

Mitch scoffed and shook his head in feign disappointment as he snatched Auston's phone out of his hand, unlocking it and opening up his contacts. "No clearly you've lost your skills and I gotta be your dating coach now," he continued to tease, before he handed the phone to you to put in your information.

You continued to giggle as you did just that while Auston blushed madly.

As you entered your name and number into Auston's phone, you couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement. Mitch's playful teasing added to the lighthearted atmosphere, and you found yourself growing more comfortable in their presence.

"There you go, Auston," you said with a mischievous smile as you handed the phone back to him. "Now you can call or text me anytime."

Auston's cheeks turned a deeper shade of red, but he flashed you a grateful smile. "Thanks, Y/N. I'll definitely be in touch."

Mitch raised an eyebrow and nudged Auston. "See, buddy? It's not that hard."

Auston rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of amusement in his expression. "Yeah, yeah, Coach Marner. I'll try to step up my game."

You looked off to the side, noticing your friends were now the ones waiting for you. "I think I've gotta go...like I said, it was nice meeting you," you smiled, taking the courage to step forward and press a light kiss to his cheek. "You guys played amazing tonight," you say softly and with sincerity.

As you pulled away from the gentle kiss on Auston's cheek, you noticed a flicker of surprise in his eyes, followed by a genuine smile. "I'll text you."

"I'll hold you to it, Matthews."

[bullet-prooflove]

5000 Follower Celebration: Field of Daisies - Mitch Ripley x Reader

Tagging: @kmc1989 @spaghettificationandpretzels @mini-bee-bee @mandy426 @jareaulamontagnes

Companion piece to:

Seperation!Series:

Marley 2.0 - Mitch doesn't realise your hiding a secret from him.

Not Your Problem - Mitch feels you pulling away from him.

Pill Popping - Mitch confronts LJ about what happened in St Clair.

Not Enough - Mitch realises he won't ever be enough for you after you reveal what happened in St Clair.

Therapy Sessions - Mitch talks through his issues with his counsellor.

Hollow - Mitch returns home to an empty house.

Swings - Mitch steps up when you recieve some life changing news.

Don't Hold Back - You struggle after spending the night with Mitch.

It’s two days later that Mitch turns up on your parent’s doorstep. You answer the door half asleep because you got off shift twelve hours ago and there’s a deep set exhaustion inside of you that has nothing to do with physicality and everything to do with the mess inside your head.

“Put on some sneakers.” He says, tucking his hands into the light blue windbreaker you’re wearing. “We’re going running.”

“You gave up the right to tell me what to do when you served me with separation paperwork.” You remind him, your temple coming to rest on the door and his jaw tenses as he looks down the street for a second.

“I deserved that.” He says before he tilts his head towards you. “But I’ve been where you are right now Marley and it’s a really dark fucking place. Trust me this helps.”

He doesn’t flinch when he meets your gaze and you sigh before you retreat into the house and step into your running shoes before snatching up your jacket, headphones and phone.

“Fine but I’m listening to my Yellowstone playlist.” You tell him as you place the earbuds in your ears.

“Sure.” He says as he takes out his own matching set.

It takes the two of you a second to sync your phones to the Bluetooth before Mitch takes off, leaving you to follow his lead. It’s a new route, one you don’t recognise until you end up running along the lake with Mitch by your side. He’s slowed his step to keep pace with you, his skin is flushed from the exertion and the cold as he draws to a halt underneath the railway bridge.

“I wanted to show you this.” He says as he gestures at the graffiti art sprayed onto the wall.

It’s a Brenda Barnum piece, a mural of white daisies painted onto the concrete amidst yellow and green hues and it makes something inside of you light up the way it always does when you see something of hers.

You’d always been a weird kid, perfect on the surface but with an oddness underneath. You didn’t like the same things as other kids, you liked quirky things, vivid colours and shit that challenged your thinking. There was always a battle to conform and you had because it made life easy but you never really felt like you fit. You’d lived with that feeling for years, thinking there was something wrong with you until you saw one of Brenda Barnum’s paintings and in that moment you realised that you didn’t have to hide yourself, you could be exactly who you wanted to be.

You’d told this to Mitch when you’d taken him to an exhibition in the early stages of the relationship, you’d explained how each painting made you feel like you’d been seen, like someone had taken the thoughts out of your head and committed them to canvas.

When he’d finished renovating the house, he’d put a framed museum print of ‘Purple Firecracker’ on the wall above your bed because he knew how much you loved the piece.

“I know you feel displaced right now.” He tells you as he leans back against the concrete pillar. “That you don’t know which way is up but I thought this could be your anchor point, a reminder of who you are underneath the rest of the shit that’s going on in your head.”

Your chest grows tight as you stare at the colours, the vividness, the complexity and in that moment everything just quietens.

“Thank you.” You say finally because you’ve been on the edge ever since you got your diagnosis and this is the first time you’ve actually allowed yourself to take a breath, to step back from the abyss that threatens to swallow you up.

“I mean it.” You say as you tilt your head towards him and his cheeks start to colour. “Thank you Mitch, for bringing me here, for reminding me I’m stronger than this.”

“You’re the toughest person I know Marley.” He tells you as he pushes off the pillar. “You just needed to find yourself again.”

“Yea.” You say, your gaze straying back to the artwork in front of you. “Yea I did.”

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Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[hischierdevils]

Ruin The Moment | M.M.

note: this song reminded me of mitch

summary: you take mitch as your date to a wedding but your ex is there and has questions

warnings: shitty ex, fluff, slight angst

wc: 1.4K

“Congratulations! It was a beautiful ceremony.” Mitch shakes your older brother’s hand before hugging your new sister in law. 

“Thanks, man.” Your older brother pulls you in for a hug. “It’s about time the two of you got together.” He says as he looks at you and Mitch standing next to each other. Mitch matched the color of his tie to your dress and he looked absolutely amazing in his suit.

Mitch had been your best friend since your first day at Blyth Academy. Everyone that knew the two of you had expected you to get together at one point but you never did. Mitch’s first love was always hockey and you didn’t want to pull him away from his dream. 

Cue the shock when you arrived at your brother’s wedding with Mitch as your date. You’re pretty sure your mother had tears in her eyes when she said hello to you. The only person that didn’t seem happy to see the two of you together was the best man, Jake. He also happened to be your ex-boyfriend. 

“Hopefully you’ll be the next bride.” Your new sister in law says as she hugs you. 

You smile at her as you glance over at Mitch. “I think it’s too early for that.” Even as you say it, you know he’s the only man you could ever picture walking down the aisle toward.

“Let’s get a picture of the four of you.” Your mom comes up behind you with her phone, motioning you and Mitch to stand by your brother and his bride. Mitch puts an arm around your waist, pulling you into his side. You place your hand on his chest as you smile at your mom. “You all look so good.” She cries. 

“Mom, it’s their day.” You laugh as you move away from Mitch. His hand catches yours and he intertwines your fingers before you can get too far away from him. “The reception is about to start, let’s go find our seats.” You tell him. 

You and Mitch were sitting at a table with six of your brother and sister in laws single friends since you added him as a plus one at the last minute. Mitch wasted no time in introducing the two of you to everyone at the table and chatting everyone up. 

It’s not until after the first dance when the bridal party sits down do you realize that Jake has a perfect view of you and Mitch from his seat. He obviously watches the two of you during the speeches and even makes a joke during his own about how his friendship with your brother survived dating his sister. 

Your brother looks at Mitch apologetically but Mitch shrugs it off, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. “You okay, y/n?” He whispers in your ear. 

“I’m fine.” You assure him before sipping on your champagne. “I’m glad you’re here with me.” 

He smiles and leans over to kiss your forehead. “There’s nowhere I'd rather be.”

After dinner, Mitch leaves you to find a bathroom before making you promise to dance with him. As if you could ever tell him no. As soon as Mitch is out of sight, Jake drops into his empty seat. “Nothing to worry about, huh?” 

You roll your eyes before turning your head to look at him. You’re a little surprised to feel nothing when you look into his green eyes. Blue is a little more your color now. “Mitch and I were just friends when you and I were together.” You explain. 

“Yeah, okay.” Jake huffs. “You ditched me for him anytime he was in town. I don’t know why I stayed so long.”

“You cheated on me.” You remind him through gritted teeth. “What does it matter now anyway?” 

“I just want you to admit that I'm not entirely at fault, y/n.” Jake tries to place his hand on top of yours but you pull away from him. “We were so good when we were good.”

“But we were usually bad.” You say, remembering the arguments, the sleepless nights on the couch. 

“I was jealous of him.” Jake says motioning to Mitch’s name tag at the table. “Clearly for good reason.” 

“You treated me like shi-”

“Excuse me.” Mitch’s voice sounds behind you as you feel a large hand rest on your shoulder. “I’d like to dance with my girl.” 

You allow Mitch to lead you to the dance floor and you eagerly step into his embrace as he holds you for a slow song. “I should’ve known he’d try something.” Mitch murmurs in your ear. 

“It’s fine.” You insist. “I’m fine.” 

“Y/n, if you just told your brother…” 

“They’ve been friends just as long as you and I have.” You tell him. “I don’t want to come between them.” 

Mitch rests his chin on the top of your head as the two of you sway back and forth. “If your brother knew the way Jake treated you he wouldn’t want to be his friend.” You rest your head on his shoulder. Deep down, you’re not so sure that that’s true. Your brother and Jake have always been close. Sometimes you wonder if he knew how awful Jake was to his girlfriends. 

As the night continues and Mitch gets more alcohol inside of him, he starts losing pieces of his outfit. First it’s the suit jacket, and then his tie. On his third trip back from the bathroom he’s missing his belt. 

“Looks like you’re going to have your hands full tonight.” Your sister in law jokes as Mitch attempts to grind on you. “He can’t keep his hands off of you.”

You blush as you wrap your arms around his neck. “He’s affectionate enough without alcohol.” You laugh. Deep down you love how handsy he is, but he doesn’t need to know that right at this moment. 

“You look beautiful tonight, y/n/n.” Mitch whispers in your ear as you dance together. He keeps you close to him all night, spinning you around the dance floor and kissing your forehead or cheeks any chance he gets. 

When you finally decide to call it a night, Mitch holds your hand and skips to your car. “You should drink, I drove.” He tells you as he opens the driver side door for you. 

You laugh and kiss his cheek. “I will drive, yes. Can you get in the car okay?” 

“Yeah, watch!” Mitch happily sprints around your car and opens the passenger door, effectively hitting himself in the face. “Shit.” 

“Oh my god, Mitchy.” You run around the car and place your hands on his face as you inspect him for any blood. “Are you okay?” 

He gives you a dopey grin. “I’m fine now that you’re here.” 

You roll your eyes and help him up. “C’mon let's get you home.” Once he’s safely in the car you get in the driver’s seat. 

As you drive, Mitch sings along with the radio and you fall in love with him even more as he sings your favorite song to you. “You know, this would be a perfect wedding song.” He tells you seriously. 

“Oh yeah?” You laugh as you glance at him out of the corner of your eye. “First dance or walk down the aisle?” 

“First dance for sure.” He smiles at you. “You’d look so good in a wedding dress.” Your heart soars as Mitch continues to talk about what he would do for his hypothetical wedding. 

When you pull into his driveway, he slumps in his seat. “Do you need help?” You ask as you’re already reaching over to undo his seatbelt. 

“No, I'm just not ready for this night to end.” He turns his head toward you and for a moment you think he’s going to kiss you. “Thanks for letting me be your fake date tonight.” 

Reality washes over you as you watch your best friend reach for the door handle. You consider admitting your feelings to him for a moment but decide that it’s not the right time. It never is. “Of course, Mitchy. Thanks for coming with me tonight.”

He reaches over to boop your nose with his finger before he opens the door. “I’ll always be here for you.” He gets out of the car and gives you a little wave. “Good night, y/n.” 

“Good night.” You reply before he shuts the door and starts walking toward his front door. “I love you.” 

[merrybloomwrites]

You Can Start a Family (Chapter 10)

Summary: Love on Tour comes to an end, and new relationships begin in Italy.

Previous Chapters: One ; Two ; Three ; Four ; Five ; Six ; Seven ; Eight ; Nine

CW: Smut

This is the final chapter of this main story! But don't worry, I have lot's of plans for blurb/ one shots. Check out my last post here for more details about that. And please send me requests!!

Thank you to everyone who has read this story! It's the first things I've ever published like this and the feedback has truly been wonderful. I hope you enjoy this last chapter.

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The second week of traveling Europe and going to shows is just as wonderful as the first. Maybe even more so. You’re more comfortable with everyone, having become friends with the whole band and a fair number of crew members. Things have calmed down slightly, and you learn that there was a lot of extra craziness surrounding the Slane and Wembley shows. Everyone has a bit more free time now, including Harry.

You, Harry, Sarah, and Mitch hang out a couple of times all together. Each pairing also spends some quality one on one time together. Sarah made plans for the two of you to get massages as well and mani pedis during a day off in Cardiff. You and Mitch have lunch together followed by him teaching you some new skills on guitar. Harry had found a hiking trail he wanted to try so the two of you do that together and have a picnic.

Mitch and Sarah each go out with Harry, and have a date just the two of them. After each outing you all tell each other what you’d done but don’t share all of the details. It doesn’t seem necessary. There is an inherent trust that you all have, and this allows you all to keep some of the individual moments special. You’d realized that in a relationship with this many people, each individual pairing needs to be fostered.

The four of you are able to hang as a group two times that week. The first time, you all go for a walk in Cardiff together and have lunch. The next day you have a movie night in Harry’s hotel room. Both times are very casual, and the conversation about Harry officially entering the relationship is never brought up. There’s an understanding that things are to go back to normal until tour ends.

You enjoy the last three shows you are at. There is a chance you’ll be back for the final show in Italy, but nothing is set in stone, so you keep that to yourself. You wander around the stadium with Brad again for the two Cardiff shows and are permitted to sit in front of the barrier during the show in Belgium. You take in every moment in Werchter, ignoring that this time tomorrow you’ll be back home. You latch on to Mitch and Sarah the second the show ends.

The three of you fight sleep that night, staying up too late talking, kissing, exploring each other’s bodies once again. You wake up wrapped in their arms and continue the activities from the night before. You spend time simply pleasing each other with your hands and mouths until your alarm goes off, signaling you need to start getting ready for the airport.

You shower, get dressed and make sure everything is packed. There are about 15 minutes left before your car leaves for the airport, and you hear a knock at the door. Mitch goes to answer and a moment later he walks back, Harry following him.

“I just wanted to say good-bye,” he says. “It truly has been wonderful getting to know you these past couple of weeks.”

“I’ve had a great time hanging out,” you reply.

“Will I see you again soon?” he asks.

“I hope so. I’m working on it.”

“Good,” he says as he pulls you in for a hug. It’s everything you’ve come to expect from Harry’s hugs- comforting, long, feels like home. You say good-bye to him before pulling back, and soon after he leaves so that you have alone time with Mitch and Sarah.

You’ve been holding up better than when they left you a few weeks prior, but as the time to depart draws closer, your eyes start to fill with tears. You look up, trying to blink them away, but it’s no use.

The second they notice Mitch and Sarah wrap their arms around you. For a few minutes no one speaks. You all just stay in this group hug, comforting one another and soaking up the contact. Your phone buzzes, and you have a text from Pete saying he’s available to drive you when you’re ready.

Sarah steps back, allowing Mitch to pull your lips up and meet his. “I love you,” he says against your mouth before moving to press a kiss to the crown of your head. “I’ll miss you baby.”

“I’ll miss you too, Mitch. I love you so much.” After one more kiss you turn from him to Sarah who immediately pulls you in tight.

“I love you sweetheart. And we’ll see you again soon, okay?”

“Okay,” you say, now so emotional that you’re having trouble getting the words out. Your “I love you” is barely a whisper, but she hears. Her hands rub your back and she kisses you just like Mitch had- first your lips, then your forehead. You keep your eyes closed, committing every detail of this interaction to memory so you can hold on to these feelings as long as possible.

You take a deep breath and finally break the hug. You grab your bags, dry your tears, share one more simple peck with each of them and walk out of the room.

Pete is waiting in the lobby along with Madi who says, “Hope you don’t mind me tagging along. A friend of mine is landing soon, and I wanted to be there to pick her up.”

You’re happy to have Madi’s company, so you reply, “I don’t mind at all!” and you give her a genuine smile. It was hard saying good-bye to Mitch and Sarah, which is why you had decided it should be done in private and not at the airport, but having Madi in the car with you raises your mood. It makes you realize that in the past two weeks you have made a lot of new friends, which is something so difficult in your adult life.

You spend much of the flight home thinking about all those friendships, the moments you spent with the band and the crew. Though you are sad to leave, you also feel happier than you have in a long time.

You text Mitch and Sarah once you get home and even though it’s the middle of the night for them, they both reply immediately. It fills you with warmth to know that they stayed up until they knew you were home safe.

*****

The next few weeks are just like those first weeks of tour, except this time you’re on the phone with more than just Mitch and Sarah. You speak to Harry every couple of days, and occasionally get to FaceTime with other members of the band when they hang out together.

A week after you leave you find out that Harry has rented out a number of homes in Italy for the week following the final show. Much of the band and crew would be staying there for a relaxing vacation after these stressful months. At first Mitch and Sarah say that they’re not going to stay, that they want to fly back to you as soon as it’s done, but you tell them not to come back right away.

You tell them that baby Ryan’s grandparents are planning to visit, and that you’re going to get more time off that week. You assure them that you can fly out at least for the second half. What you don’t tell them is that you’re actually planning to get to Italy just in time for the final show. Pete’s been helping you coordinate the details, ensuring that no one else knows. You’re not sure if he’s an incredibly loyal person, or if he simply doesn’t care about your personal life, but he’s a lifesaver for helping you without asking any questions.

The weeks end up flying by. You and Ryan spend as much time outside running around or swimming in the pool as possible. You’re keeping so active that you’re exhausted by the time you get home each night. While tiring, it comes in handy because before you know it, you’re packing for a week in Italy.

Keeping your travel plans a secret from Mitch and Sarah is difficult, especially when they call you while you wait at the airport. You run to find a quiet corner, praying no overhead announcements get picked up by the phone. You keep things light, a normal Friday night phone call before they head to bed. When they hang up you breathe a sigh of relief, as it seems they didn’t figure out your whereabouts.

This trip is definitely more stressful than the last. It’s not a direct flight and the second leg is delayed. Once you land you still have to take two trains, and due to you arriving late you miss your original departure. You get new tickets sorted and grab lunch to enjoy on the way. Finally, you arrive in Reggio Emilia, but Pete is no longer able to pick you up, since he has other jobs assigned to him. He sends another crew member, Erin, which leads to a moment of confusion since you hadn’t met her before and didn’t have a way to contact her. It takes a while but you eventually find her in the pickup area.

It's nearly 6 PM by the time you make it to the stadium. Erin ends up being a literal godsend and shows you a place where you can quickly freshen up and get changed. She also takes care of your luggage and leads you down the hall to the band dressing room.

Luckily the door is open, so you walk right in. Ariza is the first to notice, shouting, “Hey! She’s back!” which alerts everyone else to your presence.

You’re looking right at Mitch and Sarah, and you can tell the exact moment they realize who Ariza is talking about. You blink and the next thing you know Mitch has wrapped his arms tight around your waist to pick you up and spin you in a circle. He quickly puts you down and lets go, not wanting to be too obvious in front of the whole band.

Sarah hugs you next, tucking her face into your shoulder and pressing a kiss there knowing that your hair is blocking the intimate gesture. You’re then pulled into hugs by the rest of the band as well as some crew members who pass by.

After a short conversation with the band, they turn to continue getting ready. There’s definitely a different atmosphere in the room than usual, and you know everybody is dealing with their mixed emotions about this being the final show.

“Do you think there’s any chance I can say hello to Harry before the show?” you ask Mitch.

“We can go check,” he replies, “but I’m not sure if he’ll want to see people right now or be alone.”

“Of course.”

The three of you walk down the hall and Sarah gently knocks on the door. You’re standing behind her and Mitch, and so Harry doesn’t notice you when he opens the door.

“Hey guys, what’s up?” he says with a smile.

“Brought a surprise,” Sarah says before stepping to the side.

The second he sees you his eyes light up. He pulls you in for a hug, one arm secure around your waist while the other holds the back of your head. You stay like that for a full minute before he pulls back and ushers the three of you into his dressing room.

He sits in his chair, gesturing that the three of you take the couch. You sit in between Mitch and Sarah who each take one of your hands in theirs, still in slight disbelief that you’re there.

“I thought you weren’t coming for another few days,” Harry states.

“Yea, why’d you lie?” Sarah asks with a smile.

“Honestly, I wasn’t sure this would work out. I didn’t want anyone to get their hopes up just in case I didn’t make it. And I barely did. I was supposed to get here hours ago.”

“What happened?”

“Typical travel nonsense, nothing to worry about. Now tell me, how are you all feeling?”

Everyone is quiet for a minute. Harry speaks up first, saying, “I’m feeling sad that it’s ending. And proud of what we accomplished. It’s very bittersweet.” He pauses and the others nod their heads in agreement. “And I’m also feeling very hopeful. I will say I’m glad to have something to look forward to.”

You give him a confused look, not exactly sure what he’s talking about. He continues, “I mean if the offer is still there. For me to join you all.”

It clicks in your mind and your expression changes immediately.

Mitch reassures him quickly, “Of course the offer is still there. We want you to be a part of this Harry. You’re so important to us, and if we can make this work, I think we’ll all be extremely happy.”

Harry visibly relaxes in front of you, a content smile spreading across his face. This moment of peace is short lived as there is another knock on the door. Pete is there alerting everyone that it’s almost time for Wet Leg to open the show.

“I should go, I want to talk to them before they start,” Harry says.

You all get up and you turn to give Harry another hug before leaving, as you know you likely won’t see him again before the show starts. You lean in to say, “I am incredibly proud of you. Everything you’ve done is amazing. And I’m very happy to see what the next chapter brings for you, and for all of us together.”

When you pull back you see a hint of tears in his eyes. He blinks them away before looking back at you. He brings one hand up to rest on the side of your face and then hesitates. He moves forward slightly, your eyes meeting and his lips a mere inch from yours. At the last second, he seems to stop himself, and you feel his lips press against your cheek.

He pulls away to press a kiss to Mitch and Sarah’s cheeks as well, and you’re all blushing when you walk out of the room.

After a brief stop in the band dressing room, you all head out to watch Wet Leg. Sarah and Mitch are more reserved, standing together, Mitch’s arm around Sarah’s waist. A part of you wishes you could be like that in public, but you’re honestly just happy to watch them be adorable. Plus, you know the fans are loving how cute they’re being. You dance with Madi, Elin, Ariza, and Pauli and have a wonderful time.

Once Wet Leg is done you join the people who are congratulating them. After a little while you make your way to the band’s room again so you can see Mitch and Sarah before they go on. You don’t say anything, but you don’t have to. They heard your words to Harry earlier and they know you’d be saying the same to them if you had privacy.

You use your all access pass to its limits during the show, moving around to wherever you’ll get the best views without blocking any of the fans or getting in the crews’ way.

You’re mesmerized from the first moment everyone steps on stage. Harry looks amazing in his silver outfit, and you love the denim jumpsuits on the band. You practically melt every time Harry speaks in Italian. The extra songs are so special, and you barely hear the Two Ghosts intro leading to Falling because the crowd is screaming so loud.

At one point you find yourself with Brad, James Corden and a few others mixing in with the fans. Everyone loses their minds when they do the full version of Best Song Ever, including you.

You cheer extra loud for everyone when Harry introduces the band. Fine Line nearly brings you to tears. The piano piece that Harry wrote to play as the final song truly did bring you to tears. It was so beautiful and a perfect ending to the tour.

Everyone takes their final bows. Harry walks across the stage, thanking all of his fans before moving back to the center. He takes it all in, finally falling to his knees because he is so overwhelmed with emotions. You glance at Mitch and Sarah, now standing together with arms wrapped around each other. They’re watching him and you can see the love and admiration in their eyes. They’re just as proud of him as everyone else.

As soon as they walk backstage you and the rest of the family and friends head there as well. Immediately you’re met with celebratory chaos. For a solid half hour there’s cheering, shouting, dancing. Finally, everyone starts breaking away to get changed. After everyone is ready you all head over to a nearby club to properly celebrate the end of tour.

The place Harry chose is perfect. Downstairs in a small dining room, quiet music playing, and delicious Italian food set up along one wall. Upstairs is the complete opposite. It’s darker, there’s loud music, and a bar is set up on every wall of the room.

After scoping out the place Mitch simply says, “food” so you join him and Sarah at the buffet. The three of you are joined at a table by Madi and two of her friends. The food is delicious. Your family may be Italian, but they’ve never made anything this good.

Once you’re all satisfied you head upstairs. It’s gotten extremely crowded, and you have to weave your way through people to get to the bar. Sarah orders for everyone since she has the loudest voice out of the trio. You smile as she hands you your favorite.

For the next hour or so you dance, drink, sing along to the music, and have a great time. It’s been years since you’ve let loose like this, and you’re enjoying the freedom of it. For the most part you stick with Mitch and Sarah, but you also spend time hanging out with other band or crew members.

You find yourself lost in the crowd after Pauli leaves the dance floor to head to the bathroom. A moment later a man you don’t recognize walks up to you.

While the party is mostly for all the people who worked on the tour, there are also others there that you haven’t met. Some are crew members you haven’t had the chance to talk to, and some are friends, family members, or industry contacts that got an invite because of the status they hold.

“Hey, I’m Ricky,” he says, holding his hand out to you.

“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you,” you reply while quickly shaking his hand. You don’t necessarily want to talk to him, but you were always taught to be polite.

“Great party huh?” he asks, trying to keep the conversation going.

“Oh, yea, it’s pretty cool,” you reply, looking around for someone that you know but not being able to see anyone. You can’t explain it, but something about this guy has you feeling uncomfortable.

“What are you drinking? I can get you a refill.”

“Thank you but I’m alright.”

“Yea it’s getting late huh. Maybe we could get out of here, have another after party of our own.” And there it is. You’ve been hit on a couple of times before and you never know how to respond.

“No, I think I’m just going to find some of my friends.” You turn and try to walk away but he grabs your wrist to keep you there. The second his skin touches yours you start to panic. You’re not fully freaking out, figuring he wouldn’t try something in a room full of people, but what if he’s able to get you alone?

“I could be your friend.” If you weren’t so worried about what he might do, you’d be rolling your eyes at that awful line and the way he thought that would actually work on you.

“That’s okay, I’m all set on friends at the moment. Now please let go of me.”

His other hand slides to your hip, gripping tightly and he leans in to say, “Oh c’mon babe, don’t play so hard to get. It’s a night for celebrating. Let’s have some fun.”

Your panic kicks up a notch at how close he is, and how tightly he’s holding on to you. It’s becoming more obvious he’s not going to take no for an answer, and you’re desperately trying to think of ways to get away from him, or at the very least, stay in the crowded party room until someone finds you.

He steps more into your space and your mind goes blank with fear. Suddenly there’s a hand on the small of your back and you jump at the touch. “Shh, love, it’s just me,” you hear Sarah say and take a deep, relieved breath. You’re finally free from his hold and you lean into Sarah who wraps her arm tight around your waist.

You look up and see Mitch leaning over Ricky, talking so low that you can’t hear him, but whatever he says works and the man walks away looking both embarrassed and afraid. Mitch takes a deep breath before turning to you. He cups your face in his hand and asks, “Are you okay?”

Your eyes are wide with leftover fear and panic as you meet his, but you nod. “I’m okay,” you say quietly, but they’re both close enough to hear you.

“Okay. Good. Do you want to leave and go back to the house?”

You shake your head no. “I really don’t want to end the night on that note. Can we stay a little longer?”

“Yea, baby, whatever you want.”

“But just stay with me, okay?”

“Of course,” Sarah says.

Mitch adds, “We’re not leaving your side for a second.”

You take another minute to collect yourself and put a smile back on your face before sliding your hand into Sarah’s and leading her to the dance floor. At first, you’re not as into it as before, going through the motions rather than fully dancing. Eventually the rest of the band joins in and you feed off their positive vibes. By the time people start leaving an hour or so later you’ve basically forgotten about Ricky.

After another little while most of the people have gone. The music is turned down and the lights are still dim but brighter than before. Mitch leads you and Sarah over to one of the bars, where Harry now seems to be sitting by himself, a new drink in hand.

You had lost track of Harry an hour or so before, and it seems he had spent much of that time in this location. You’ve never seen him drunk before, and while he’s certainly not wasted, he’s not sober either. He has a sort of a lost, sad puppy look on his face.

“You alright man?” Mitch asks, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Yea, mate. I’m good,” Harry replies in a tone that indicates he’s definitely not as good as he says.

 Mitch gently takes the glass from his hand and places it on the bar and says, “I think it’s time to go. They’re starting to clean everything up.”

“I don’t want to go,” Harry replies. A beat later he continues, “I don’t want to be alone.”

Your heart breaks at the sadness in his voice and you share a look with Mitch and Sarah. You know they feel the same.

“You’re not going to be alone, love,” Sarah says gently. Harry looks up at her, not understanding. “We’re coming with you. Tours over. We’re all going to be together. And that can start tonight. Does that sound alright to you?”

His face lights up at this news. He nods and looks between the three of you, seeing smiles on all of your faces.

“Come on, let’s get going,” Mitch says, wrapping an arm around Harry and supporting him out to the car. Harry leans heavily on him, but you think this has less to do with being unsteadily drunk and more to do with seeking comfort from the physical touch. You know that’s what he’s doing because you’re doing the same with Sarah.

A large black Chevy Suburban is waiting outside for your group. You and Sarah climb into the back row and Mitch and Harry take the middle. You try to stay awake for the drive, but it turns out you’re heading straight to the beach villa which is two hours away. You fight sleep for the first few minutes, trying to watch the scenery outside, but Sarah sees what you’re doing. She knows that between working all day Friday and then immediately traveling to the show, you likely haven’t slept in close to 40 hours.

Her arm wraps around you and her hand presses gently on the side of your head. “Sleep my love,” she says. You stop trying to fight it and instead melt into her side, your head resting on her shoulder. You fall asleep immediately.

The sun is starting to rise by the time you arrive at the house. The others had all dozed off as well but wake up when you pull into the driveway. You, however, snuggle closer to Sarah, refusing to open your eyes. Mitch looks back and sees the predicament and says to Sarah, “Go in with Harry, I’ll take care of her.”

Sarah moves you so that you’re leaning against the window instead of against her. Mitch lowers the middle row of seats so that Sarah can get out and so he can reach you. He carries you into the house and finds the other two in the bedroom. Harry is setting out some of his clothes for everyone.

“I don’t think they knew where to bring your bags. We’ll get them here in the morning, but you can borrow these for now.” Mitch lays you on the bed and takes off your clothes from the day, pulling a large t-shirt over your head to cover you.

“If you guys want you can have this room, I’ll sleep in the other one,” Harry says.

Mitch and Sarah share a confused look. “Harry,” Sarah starts. “We were planning on you staying with us here. So that we’re all together.”

“Will we all fit?”

“Of course we will. Y/N typically sleeps on top of one of us anyway so technically she doesn’t take up any room,” Mitch says with a fond smile.

They climb into bed with you, Sarah next to you on one side with Harry on the other. Mitch checks the doors are locked before turning off the light and getting in next to Harry. Everyone falls asleep within minutes.

You wake up to bright sunlight in an unfamiliar room. You’re laying on top of someone, a male someone, but it isn’t Mitch. You think about everything you remember from the previous night, and panic. The only thing that comes to mind that could explain the current situation would be if Ricky had come back and somehow got you to go home with him.

You quickly sit up, moving so suddenly that you nearly fall off of the bed. Sarah catching you is the only reason you don’t fall to the floor. Seeing her is enough to break through the panic, and your brain finally wakes up enough to realize what’s going on.

You weren’t sleeping on Mitch, but he is right next to you. It was Harry underneath you. You’re embarrassed by your reaction, and disappointed that you ruined what should’ve been a sweet moment.

“Are you okay?” Harry asks. “Did I do something to make you uncomfortable?”

“No! Not at all. I’m fine, I just got confused for a minute. There was a guy last night who was hitting on me and not taking no for an answer and when I woke up in a new place, I got scared thinking I was with him. Just freaked out for a second.”

“Who was it?”

“I think he said his name was Ricky.”

“I don’t know a Ricky. He must be one of the people management insisted we invite for networking. I can get the guest list, figure out exactly who he is if you want. Get him fired or something.”

His protectiveness has you feeling incredibly cared for, but you assure him that it’s fine.

“Can we just redo that?” you ask.

“What do you mean?” Sarah says.

“Redo the start of the day. It’s the first time all four of us are waking up together and I ruined it!”

“You did not ruin anything Y/N,” Mitch says. “You expressed real emotions, okay? We’ve talked about this; you can’t feel guilty for having feelings.”

“I know, I know! I’m not trying to ignore my feelings. But I want today to be a happy day. And I want to start it right. So can we please forget all that and redo?”

“Yes, love,” Sarah says. “We can start again if that’s what you’d like.”

“Thank you!” You crash into Harry, pushing him back so he’s once again laying down with you on top of him.

You lift your head off his chest to meet his eyes. “Good morning darling,” he says, and you smile as you say the same to him. You then turn to Mitch and Sarah and they each wish you good morning and place a kiss on your lips.

There’s a moment where no one knows what to do next, but Mitch makes a decision. He leans down so he’s level with Harry. Their eyes meet and slowly they inch their faces closer together. Finally, their lips meet. It’s a small press of their lips, chaste, almost domestic, like it’s something they’ve been doing to greet each other every morning for years.

When they pull back there’s a new light in Harry’s eyes. He looks happy and peaceful, like he’s been waiting for this forever. He turns his head, and since you’re still on top of him you think it’s your turn to properly greet him. But Sarah leans in, capturing his lips with her own. Mitch chuckles as you pout, but the expression quickly fades away as you watch the two of them.

While the kiss with Mitch was one of familiarity, and rekindling a romance, this is two people exploring each other for the first time. After years of friendship and working together, they now get to come together in this new way. They take a minute to get lost in one another, and you smile as you hear soft sighs from both of them.

They break apart and Harry looks to you. He brings his hands up to cup your cheeks and you move so close that your noses brush and you can feel his soft exhale on your skin.

“Is this okay?” he asks quietly, and you whisper “yes” before crashing your lips to his. His fingers slide through your hair, holding you close to him as his lips slot against yours. It’s a short kiss that has you craving more, but as you pull away you know it’s perfect for the moment.

“I want to have a proper date with you all,” Harry says.

“We’d love that,” Sarah answers.

“Tonight. I don’t want to waste another minute.”

The conversation is interrupted by knocking at the front door. You move so that Harry can get up and answer it. He walks back a minute later and lets you guys know that your luggage was just dropped off. Hearing that makes you realize how long it’s been since your last shower and so you open your bag and grab what you’ll need.

Everyone takes turns showering and getting ready. Once you’re done you realize you’re starving and look at the clock. You’re shocked to see it’s already past 2 in the afternoon. You head to the kitchen and see Harry making sandwiches for everyone.

“Anything I can help with?” you ask.

“Got a bunch of fruit in the fridge, can you help me cut that up?”

“Absolutely!”

You get to work, natural light streaming through the windows of the beautiful kitchen. The four of you sit down for lunch and then enjoy the afternoon sitting out by the pool. Luckily the house is set away and is completely private, allowing you all to be yourselves without fear of fans or paparazzi seeing.

By 5 o’clock you’re all inside getting dressed for the date. Harry had planned it all and told you to dress nice, but casual. You’re a bit confused but settle for a blue and white sun dress. You walk downstairs and see not only Harry, Sarah, and Mitch, but two other people as well.

“Y/N, I’d like you to meet Claudio and Mia. They’re going to be cooking dinner for us all tonight,” Harry says to introduce you. You shake their hands and say hello and you realize the date Harry has planned.

It’s perfect. A wonderfully cooked Italian meal here at the villa. There’s no risk of you all being spotted or overheard, and you’re free to have a true first date. If you’d all gone out, then you’d have to be careful about everything you say and do, but that’s not the case here.

The four of you make your way out to the patio and immediately open a bottle of wine, Harry filling everyone’s glasses. A few minutes later Mia brings out the first appetizer, a caprese salad that must be made with the freshest ingredients you’ve ever tasted. Next, she brings out a fig and goat cheese crostini, some of which are topped with prosciutto that makes your mouth water.

Dinner is just as delicious, homemade pasta topped with a sauce that is both decadent and light, bursting with flavor. After dinner, while you’re sharing the second bottle of wine, Claudio and Mia come out one last time. They inform you all that they are heading home, and dessert is plated in the kitchen whenever you’re ready.

You thank them profusely, telling them how much you loved everything, and Harry walks them out. He comes back and the four of you are once again alone. While dinner conversation had been quite casual, everyone learning more about each other, it starts to get a bit deeper.

“How exactly will this all work?” Harry asks.

“Well, obviously communication is the most important thing here,” Sarah replies. “Everyone needs to be honest and open about anything they’re feeling. If we hide things from each other that will create problems.”

“And what about publicly? We can’t really go and tell the fans all four of us are together.”

Mitch answers this time saying, “No but we could just say that you and Y/N are together. She’s been seen enough with us, people probably have assumed by now she’s our friend. You’d say we introduced the two of you and you hit it off. And because she’s our friend it would make sense for all of us to be seen together.”

“Lots of double dates in our future,” Sarah says with a wink.

Harry turns to you and asks, “Are you okay with that? Dating me publicly?”

“I am. I know that it’ll probably come with some pushback from fans and things like that, but I really think this could work. And we’ll all be happy.” Harry leans in, pressing his lips to yours. It’s innocent enough and first, just a couple of quick pecks.

He pulls back and his eyes meet yours. There’s a moment where he watches you, his gaze intense, and the next thing you know his lips are back on you. Even though the kiss is firm, his lips feel wonderfully soft against yours as he takes control of the kiss. You feel his hand move to your thigh and you gasp, opening your mouth and allowing for his tongue to enter.

“Maybe we should head inside,” Mitch suggests. You bite back a whine as Harry pulls away, already missing the feeling of his lips. Everyone stands and heads inside to the bedroom. It honestly should feel weird, the group of you moving in near silence, but the energy is one of excited anticipation.

You pause once inside the room, unsure of what to do next. There are so many options, too many choices, and you do not want to be the one making any. You look to Mitch, who sees the hesitation from all of you, and he takes control of the situation.

“Harry and Y/N, lay next to each other,” he says. You both follow his directions as he turns to speak with Sarah. You’re only left wondering what their plan is for a moment before they also climb on the bed, Mitch straddling Harry while Sarah does the same to you.

She leans in to kiss you, her tongue sliding in immediately. She swallows the whine you let out, and all you can think of is her. It’s been over a month, and you’ve missed them all so much, you’ve been starving for their touches.

After a little while (truly you have no idea how long) you feel Mitch’s hand pick yours up and he places it on Harry’s thigh. A second later you feel Harry’s hand on you. It starts moving higher on your leg, sliding under your skirt. Sarah shifts only so that you can spread your legs a bit but continues to keep her lips on yours.

Harry’s hand moves again, this time to press two fingers to your clit over your underwear and you’re gasping in pleasure at this touch alone. You automatically grab his thigh and realize that your hand hasn’t moved since Mitch placed it there. You decide to follow Harry’s lead and slide it up his thigh. You and Harry let out matching moans as you finally grip Harry’s hard length over his shorts.

You feel Harry pull away for a second before he slips his fingers under your panties to touch you directly. Your eyes roll back at the feeling of being touched so intimately. Summoning confidence that you didn’t know you possess, you slide your hand under his layers of clothing. There’s a moment where you hesitate, unsure if it’s okay to touch him directly. He senses your inner debate and guides your hand to his cock, letting you know it’s absolutely okay with him.

You grip your fist around his length and pump him a few times. The noises he makes only turn you on more. Your other hand travels down to Sarah’s leg, and you move under her skirt and waste no time sliding your fingers into her underwear to rub through her folds.

She’s soaking, and you easily push two fingers inside her.

“Fuck, Y/N,” she moans before starting to leave love bites along your neck. She pulls back and looks to her side, saying, “Mitch, switch with me.”

He gives Harry one last deep kiss before pulling away from him. Sarah gently pushes your fingers out of her so she can move to Harry’s lap. “Are you clean?” she asks him as they help each other out of their clothes.

“Yes, got checked a couple weeks ago, haven’t been with anyone since.”

“Good,” she says, running her entrance above the tip of his cock. “Is this okay?” she asks him.

“Please, yes,” he practically begs, and she sinks onto him. You’re watching them so intently that you don’t notice Mitch at first. That changes the second he pulls your panties off and his hard cock grazes your sensitive clit.

He brings his hand to your entrance, pushing in one finger at a time to open you and ensure you’re ready for him. A moment later his fingers are gone and you feel his cock lining up. His eyes meet yours in a silent question and you nod your head, wrapping your legs to bring him closer to tell him that you want this, want him desperately.

He slowly pushes inside you and you let out a broken moan at the feeling of being filled for the first time in over a month. You pull Mitch’s face down to yours, having realized that you’ve barely had the chance to kiss him all weekend, and you need to remedy that immediately.

The time that follows is both blissful, and a bit confusing. Everyone’s hands are traveling over any limb they can find, kisses being pressed against any bit of bare skin.

You and Harry are the first to come, nearly simultaneously while his tongue is sliding against yours. A moment later you hear the cries that can only mean Sarah has followed the two of you. Finally, you feel Mitch’s thrusts stutter as he finishes inside you.

Everyone comes down from their high, Sarah pulling off and laying next to Harry. Mitch moves to pull out of you but you hold him close and whisper, “Not yet, please.”

“Okay, baby, I’m here,” he answers, leaning down so that you can tuck your face into his neck. After a couple minutes you release your hold on him. Sarah has already snuck out to grab a couple of damp washcloths from the bathroom and she helps everyone clean up.

You all get ready for bed, checking in that everyone is okay with what just happened. Not one of you has any complaints or uncomfortable feelings, and you fall asleep content that the four of you will work just fine together.

The rest of the week in Italy is absolutely perfect. Your group has plenty of time to spend together and your personalities fit together wonderfully. There are a few more discussions regarding the dynamics of the relationship which helps you all feel secure with one another.

During the middle of the week Harry rents out a couple of boats and you all spend the day on the water. Gemma and a few others join you and it is absolute perfection.

At one point Harry wanders to the kitchen area and a moment later Sarah follows him. While he’s been enjoying the day as much as everyone else, she can tell he’s bothered by something and is determined out figure out what it is.

They talk for a few minutes while making drinks for everyone, and after a beat of silence Sarah finally asks, “What is it Harry?”

“Not sure what you mean. I’m fine.”

“No you’re not love, something’s bothering you.”

He takes a deep breath and says, “I know there’s paparazzi watching us. And other people are here. And I guess I am used to hiding a lot of my life but this time feels different. I don’t want to hide our relationship.”

Sarah places a comforting hand on his arm and says, “I completely understand. I know it’s not ideal that we can’t all be together publicly, but if you’re ready, nothing is stopping you from being with Y/N in front of the camera. Whatever comes from that, we’ll make it work.”

Harry smiles, eased by Sarah’s words of wisdom.

They walk back to the main area where the rest of you are hanging out and Harry sits down next to you, closer than he usually would in public. He wraps his arm around your shoulders, and you give him a look. He can tell that you’re confused by the gesture, but not mad or uncomfortable.

He leans in and quietly asks, “Would it be alright if I kissed you?”

“Of course you can.”

“I mean, in front of everyone. With paps watching over there.”

“Yes Harry. That’s perfectly fine with me,” you answer with a smile.

He cups your face, pulling you close to him. He hesitates with his lips mere centimeters away and you whisper “It’s okay, Harry.” A millisecond later his lips crash against yours. He presses firmly against you, a series of chaste kisses on your mouth, nose, and forehead. When you look up you see everyone watching the two of you.

Mitch and Sarah are looking over, warm smiles on their faces. After a beat, Gemma jumps up and rushes over to give the two of you a hug. “I told mum weeks ago you two would be perfect!”

The rest of the day is absolutely wonderful. After sailing in the sun for the afternoon you all head back for dinner at a beautiful restaurant.

You, Harry, Mitch, and Sarah get to the house just after sunset. Immediately you fall into bed, not wanting to waste another moment. You explore each other’s bodies once again. Harry proves without a shadow of a doubt that he is a gentleman, checking in with you constantly as he slides into you for the first time, stretching you more than you’ve ever been before.

As you’re all catching your breath, trying to readjust the mess of covers, you can’t help but start to giggle. It’s contagious and suddenly the four of you are laughing, though no one’s entirely sure why.

You finally calm down enough to say, “I can’t believe this is my life.”

“Well, believe it baby,” Harry says. “Because we’re not going anywhere.”

“Good.” You reply, shifting everyone so that you’re laying across all three of them. With your head on Mitch’s chest, torso being held by Harry, and legs tangling with Sarah, you fall asleep.

Your last thoughts of the night are about how indescribably happy you are that you’ve found your home and have started a perfect family.

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@akkatz @pandeebearstyles @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @theekyliepage @numafarawayglxy @booberry019-blog @hillzrry @ssareidbby @gem1712 @acesofspadess @houseofdilfs @shaquille-0atmeal-1 @kissitnhekitchen @amateurduck @poguestyleskye

AN: Thank you again for reading this story! Can't wait to share more with you all!

[nomagicartz]

Waaaaaait a minute here!

With all the Merome art you’ve made, I’m surprised to see Mitch and Jerome on your relationship chart are just friends! Are they crushes? One sided love? Spill the details spill them!!!!

this might be a long one because i am oh so ill over them

im glad you noticed that silly little detail ! to put it simply they are awful and mitch will not come to terms that he likes men . its awful . theyre awful .

mitch being this awful is why i often draw him looking away! or just never making eye contact with jerome

So for . most of the story . their love is very one sided . Jerome devotes himself to Mitch, and hes kept it up since day one. They met in the games. The only time Mitch will ever let himself get that close is when they are in the games.

Mitch wants to let himself love Jerome. But how can he. How could he. He kills Jerome like clockwork in those games. He knows exactly where to hit him. His sword has carved through Jerome's chest more times than he can count.

Jerome is a loyal dog. He's a dead one. He doesn't care about any of this, he's just glad Mitch is there, and that he can devote himself.

Mitch cant love Jerome back till he leaves the games. He's stuck in a burning house and he cant leave. Jerome wont leave without Mitch.

So theyre stuck in a never ending cycle. Mitch wont leave till he loses. But he's built for killing. Its carved into his being. Every time he tries to let someone else win, to let Jerome win, a switch flicks on in his mind, and blood soaks his hands. Jerome wont leave without MItch, so every game he tries his damned best to win, to get them both out of this awful cycle. But theyre stuck in this holographic world, where death is only momentary and sweet.

Im so sorrty for ranting holy fuck i hate them actually theyre so awful to each other .

TLDR mitch bets on losing dogs and has too much internalized homophobia . here have a playlist with songs that i associate so deeply with them .

[invisibleraven]

Keeping Spirits Bright

Julie and the Phantoms Advent fills 2024! We're back baby! Another year, another 25 days of holiday joy with our favourite ghost band! I hope you enjoy, and remember, engagement is the best present this holiday season!

Day 1: Adventure + PeterPatter <=AO3

When the Pattersons decided to retreat to a cabin in the woods to give Luke the real old fashioned holiday experience, he only had one request-he wanted to bring Reggie with them. 

“Oh honey, won’t his family want to spend Christmas with him?” Emily asked. She didn’t know much about the Peters; Reggie never mentioned them much, but surely they wouldn’t let their only son up and leave for the holidays. 

“Reggie doesn’t celebrate Christmas,” Luke replied. “He celebrates…Hanka?”

“Channukah?” she corrected with a smile.

“That’s the one!” Luke stated with a snap and a pointed finger. “So his family won’t mind and I think he’d really like to have Christmas for once. Please ma? I won’t even ask for any presents if Reggie can come!”

“No presents? Really?” she asked with an arched eyebrow. 

“Well…not many presents,” Luke amended. “Plus I need to get Reg something.” 

Emily melted at that-Luke had taken Reggie under his arm since he moved to LA a few months ago, and she loved how devoted the boys were to each other. It also didn’t hurt that Reggie was always so sweet and thankful for every scrap of affection any of them showed him every time he visited. So if Emily could do this for her son, she would. 

Thankfully, Linus and Evelynn Peters seemed more than happy to let Reggie go, and Emily ignored the mumbled comments of him not being underfoot. Luke had let out a whoop of joy at the news, enveloping Emily in a big hug, which she treasured, especially since Luke seemed to shirk every touch since hitting double digits. 

So the day after school let out, the Pattersons packed up their station wagon, heading down to Silver Lake, then they would make their way north to the little cabin they had rented until January. Where the forecast was calling for a little snow, giving Emily the white Christmas she wanted without subjecting her California boys to a blizzard. She swore one day she would bring them home to Quebec-maybe for Carnivale, they would like that. 

“You excited Luke?” Mitch asked as they neared Reggie’s house. 

“Yeah!” Luke exclaimed. “Me an’ Reg are gonna make a snowman, and help you chop down a tree, and sing carols!” 

Emily and Mitch shared a grin-Luke may be nearing his teen years, but he was always enthusiastic about the holidays. That’s why they were doing this now before he got too old for it or decided both they and Christmas were too lame to even acknowledge. 

Their smiles faded though, when they arrived at the little faded yellow house to find Reggie already outside, sitting on his suitcase. All alone, with no one to see him off or even say goodbye to. Even as he lit up, rushing to the car, tossing his luggage in the trunk before claiming his seat next to Luke. “Thanks again for letting me come Mr. & Mrs. P.”

“Of course Reggie, happy to have you,” Mitch said, reaching over to squeeze Emily’s hand. Now more than ever she was determined to give her boys-and that included Reggie now-a great holiday. 

They drove on, the boys happily chatting away in the back seat, the radio playing softly, with Emily knitting as the scenery passed by. She had already made Luke and Mitch new stockings, and she was almost done her own. Thank goodness she had brought lots of yarn though, because she was definitely going to be making one for Reggie. They already had things to fill it with, so she just needed to knit it. 

By the time they got to the road for the cabin, the boys were asleep in the back, and Emily was flagging herself. They had stopped for supper at a small diner hours earlier, so they only had to unpack the car when they got in before bed. 

Luke of course, was up with the sun, waking Reggie with him in the process since they were sharing a bed. “We should go out, have some adventures before ma and pop get up,” he said quietly. 

Reggie gave him a bleary smile, the both of them invigorated by the fresh cool air. “We should look for reindeer!” he exclaimed. 

“Why?” 

“Well Santa has to store them somewhere with room to run around before Christmas, why not here?” 

Luke had to keep his face from moving-since Reggie had never done Christmas, apparently no one had ever told him the truth about Santa either. Luke had known for a year or two, and while he was a little sad the world was a less magical place, he had come to terms with it. His folks had explained it to him, and even offered to still do Santa presents for him, but he figured he was too old for that. Maybe he could change the tags though-just to let Reggie keep the magic alive a little longer. Then he’d tell him the truth once they were home. 

But he could erase the joy in Reggie’s heart-not yet anyway. “Yeah, let’s go see if we can find Rudolph!” 

So they scurried through the forest, upsetting dirt and the small bit of frost there. Pretending they were explorers, discovering unclaimed land, on the hunt for the fabled North Pole. 

Of course there were no reindeer to be found, but they were having too much fun to care, collecting pine cones, spotting the odd bird or creature who hadn’t hidden away to hibernate. Making up songs as they explored, only heading back when they heard Luke’s mom call out for breakfast. 

“I guess Santa brought the reindeer back to the North Pole already, Reg,” Luke said. 

Reggie deflated for a moment then shrugged. “It was a long shot anyways. I bet they’re in like the Yukon during the off season anyways-less travel time.” 

“You’re totally right,” Luke said, then tapped him on the shoulder. “Tag, you’re it!” 

“No fair!” Reggie giggled, chasing after him, all thought of reindeer forgotten. 

Well until he opened his stocking on Christmas morning and found a messily scrawled song about two explorers finding the North Pole. And even if Luke told him there was no Santa, Reggie still had that song, and all those memories to keep the magic of the holidays alive for the rest of his life. A song he shared with his and Luke’s kids many years later as they went on their own reindeer hunt.

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

6 angst pls!!!!!

OK, so there 5 more asks of this same combo so I'm just gonna count them all as this one:)

Being on Harry's management team was mostly wonderful and a very positive experience so far. He was so kind, honest, direct, hard-working, receptive, and trusting. This conglomeration of traits made him a dream to work with. He hardly ever gave you any trouble, but he was human so of course, he made mistakes and bad judgement calls, but he was never one to come up with some elaborate scheme to distract from those things. He'd fix the issue with whoever had been involved and move on, he didn't feel a need to defend himself to the press or the public when they had nothing to do with his private problems. No twitter-storms for him and that made the management team's job pretty easy.

But just because Harry was a mellow and level-headed guy it didn't make him exempt from the old rumor mill. People just found any excuse to be nasty. And like any normal person, Harry had things going on in his personal life that sometimes just made him more sensitive or susceptible to feeling low. Like now... someone he had been seeing exclusively for a few months apparently hadn't granted him the same courtesy. A friend of his in London saw her kissing someone else and well...he didn't take it too well and out of frustration, he drunkenly kissed the next willing person and well...that backfired on him. And now the person he'd been seeing was telling everyone that he had cheated on her. Harry was really angry with that.

He knew that he couldn't control other people, but he just wished that the people he let into his life would just take a moment to think. Thankfully no one was really believing that he had been seeing this clout-chasing chick, but it still hurt his feelings. He had let her in to his life. He had slept with her, he had taken her on dates, he had told her things about himself...he felt betrayed and for some reason this particular time it was just taking a lot longer for him to bounce back.

In session, his writing was reflecting his evident frustration and he was being quite petty. This was personal and he hated that he was stooping to that level. He felt immature and incapable of handling what he was feeling and it was ridiculous.

"This is so fucking stupid..." he groaned into his hands. You'd watched this chaos unfold for long enough, so you decided to step in.

"Guys, I think it's a good time to take a little break. Get some lunch...take a walk..." she said to the others in the room.

"Yeah, good call." Harry mumbled and people started getting up to leave and as Harry stood from his seat and started walking out behind Mitch you called out to him.

"Not you, Harry!" you called after him and he patted Mitch on the back and said a couple things to him before Mitch gave him a thumbs up and headed off. Harry came back over to his previous seat as you stood at the control panel, just looking around. You were the newest addition to him team, hired on just shy of a year ago. You'd mostly been handling contracts though and he'd been touring and releasing films so you hadn't really had a lot of face-time with him. And he didn't know you as well as he knew the rest of his team, they'd been friends even before they managed him. So you got that you were new and that he was a bit unsure around you, but you just wanted to make sure he was OK.

"Look, I know that we've basically wasted the morning and that we're gonna need to pay for another day-"

"Harry, I don't care about that, I'll book another day out if you want it, no problem." you assured him, "I just wanted to make sure that you're OK." you said and his expression changed to a more relaxed one.

"Oh." he said and you offered him a slight and sympathetic smile.

"Yeah. I know it's been rough and I know that we don't know each other that well, but if you're not feeling this kind of work right now you don't have to do this." you explained and he smiled a bit.

"I know I've sucked today, but to the point where my own manager would rather I not do a writing session?" he asked and you chuckled.

"Can I be candid with you?" you asked and he nodded firmly, "I really like your music. And I'm not just saying that, it's heavily featured on a few of my playlists," you explained and he smiled, "And while I realize that some of the best work can come from painful or angry places, you're currently giving... Taylor Swift circa 2008-2009." you said and he literally burst out laughing and you chuckled softly at his reaction.

"Some might argue that those were her golden years." he said after he settled down.

"I'm not saying it's bad, but what I mean to say is she was a teenager then and it...shows. And not that you can't behave like a teenager as an adult... everyone's journey is different!" you defended and he chuckled, "But I know that's not you. And I just feel like you're just really frustrated with everything you're going through and it's not coming out right because you're kind of trying to force yourself to push through your hurt with this process." you said and he bit his lip sadly for a moment before he sighed.

"Look I'm just...feeling really hopeless right now. And you're absolutely right, that's not me." he shook his head as he looked in your eyes. "I feel so foreign to my own mind....like, when did it even know how to think that way?" he said and you nodded, "I mean...I can't accept to believe that things will never work out. That I'll never get a chance at a normal relationship again. That everyone in my life has an ulterior motive...but I'm starting to, Y/N." he said with so much hurt in his eyes, they were glossy from the tears forming and you just reached out and he grabbed your hand.

You didn't have any words to say to him. You had no idea what it felt like to be him. Anyone would think he'd have it easy, but it was harder than it was easier most of the time. You just wanted him to know that you heard him and that you were there with him, that's it. Your thumb ran over his knuckles in a comforting gesture and suddenly his tears startled to fall and he inhaled sharply as he tried to hold back his sob and you frowned when he just decided to let it out. You stood immediately and hugged him against your chest. His head was resting right over your heart and you just held his head with one hand and lightly scratched his back with the other. After a few minutes he'd calmed but made no move to get out of your hold. You understood, sometimes you just needed to be held.

"I'm sorry, I didn't plan to lay all that on you." he said quietly and smiled.

"It' don't mind it. It's why I'm here." you said and he let go of you and leaned back as he looked at you looking a bit perplexed.

"What you're here for?" he asked with some hurt in his voice and then you shook your head.

"Oh, not like as part of my job, Harry!" you explained quickly, "I mean like here here. Like on planet earth. As a human being I'm here to share experiences and relate with other human beings. To learn to care for each other and help each other..." you said and he nodded and then smiled slightly.

"Right...I was about to say, after everything I've just told you?" he chuckled lightly now and you did too as you place a hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah, sorry for the misunderstanding." you shook your head in a little embarrassment, "So did that help? Just...letting it out?" you asked him and he nodded.

"Yeah, I feel a bit better." he said.

"A bit is more than nothing." you said with a smile, taking the win and he nodded. "So, would you like to keep trying here or would you like to call it a day?" you asked him and he sighed and looked into your eyes.

"I think we should call it a day." he concluded.

"OK, I'll let the guys know." you said with a small smile and headed out to the food lounge. After you told them the new you chit-chatted for a bit before saying goodbye. You hummed happily as you considered the possibilities for the rest of your day... grab your things, pick up a nice bottle of wine, call your nail lady and to see if she could squeeze you in for a pedi? As you came back into the studio you that Harry had his things packed on the floor beside him while he sat on the arm of the couch. He glanced up when he heard you come in and you smiled, "Hey H, sorry if I kept you waiting, I got to talking. Did you need something else from me?" you asked.

"I'm gonna ask you something and it's gonna sound awful, but I promise I mean it in the most not awful way-"

"Harry, just ask." you interrupted him with a chuckle and he nodded.

"Right. Ummm...w-would you like to spend the night at mine?" he asked you and you looked at him skeptically.

"Like....for....?"

"Not sex!" he said right away and then shook his head, "Not because you're a person I wouldn't want to have sex with. Like I would if I had to. Like...last people on earth type of thing. But well, that sounds like I'd do it with you just because I had no other choice. Which I mean, I would still probably have sex with you given a choice, you know?" he finished his ramble and you just decided to not even go there.

"OK...so not for sex. So then for what?" you asked him.

"Just to be with someone. We could play board games or watch movies or tv...ummm, I'm pretty sure I've got everything I'd need to make banana bread... we could do that. Or just talk and listen to music? We can do whatever I just don't want to be alone." he admitted softly.

"Harry...I really want to, but I also work for you and I... just don't want to blur the boundaries too much." you explained.

"You literally just told me this is why you're here." he appealed to her, "I'm friends with Jeff and Tommy...why couldn't I be friends with you?" he asked and you smiled at him.

"You're not exactly asking a crazy question..." you said and he smiled lightly at you. "Fine. But I'm gonna go home and pack a bag. When I arrive I hope to smell some banana bread in the oven." you said and he smiled.

"Deal." he said and you nodded. He reached for your bag on the coffee table and handed it over and you smiled and thanked him as you walked down the hall. "Gonna go say good bye to the lads."

"Yeah, you go ahead." you assured him and he made his way down the other hall, "H!" you called after him and he glanced back, "You're gonna be OK. I promise." you said and he smiled before you waved and headed back to your car.

READ MORE PICTURE PROMPT BLURBS HERE!

[chayacat]

can i request a stan and mitch x reader 🫶

Of course ! there you go ! it's a little short, but this is the first time i made a characterxreader so i don't know how long it has to make ^^" Hope you like it still !

Support Hug Attack!  

Fandom: Road 96 

StanxReader/MitchxReader 

Fluff,Cuteness,support a sick OC, hug, comfort.  

*** 

You never imagined that one day your prayers would be heard. You worked at Super Supper but you only wanted one thing, to be allowed to leave this hell. The boss was horrible to you, constantly putting you down, or complaining. But one day they arrived. Well, they weren't heroes, they were robbers. There were two. and their outfits were... Special. It looked like they were coming out of an S&M role play. They had taken the contents of the cash register, as well as the customers' money before taking you hostage because according to them: "we can not make a good robbery, without hostages". This is Stan & Mitch’s rule. So they took you outside and 50 meters further, they hid with you to be able to count their loot.  

84 dollars, for you it was nothing but for them, it was huge. They were going to leave, explaining you that they needed a "fake" hostage and they were even ready to compensate you for the "emotional duress", but what was their surprise, when you grabbed Stan's arm, begging them to take you with them. And after explaining why, they agreed. Over time, you ended up becoming friends, and then... much more than friends. It was impossible for you, and totally out of the question, to choose between the two. So, you decided to love both of them. And they gave it back to you. Even if sometimes, Stan is not very sharing, even with his brother.  

But you didn't care, because they each brought something to your life, Stan the protection and Mitch, the gentleness. That day, they were out for one of their robberies, you had remained at the hideout, too weak to move. You hadn't been feeling well for a few days. And that, the Sanchez brothers had noticed. Unfortunately, taking you to a doctor was quite complicated, there were very few in this country. And the prices were excessive. But Sonya had a medical book at home, and Mitch was able to quickly find out what you had. It was a simple flu. You were lying down when you heard the sound of their motorcycle stopping. And by the sound of their voices, they had another good heist. 

“We’re home!” Said Stan descending the makeshift ladder they had built. 

“Hey...” you start before coughing dryly. “How did it go?” 

“$120. Best robbery ever. You should see the expression on that poor sucker’s face.” Responds Mitch.  

“I would have liked to see that indeed.”  

“How do you feel?” replied Stan sitting next to you. 

“Not much better...that damn flu doesn’t want to go easily....” 

“Don’t worry, with some rest, and some medication that we recovered thanks to Sonya, you will recover very quickly. Don't you want to at least eat a little something?” asks Mitch. 

“Urgh...Sorry Mitch but, just talking about food makes me more sick than before.” you responds with a disgusted smile.  

Mitch shook his head, making you realize that it was nothing, before going back up to park the motorcycle properly. Stan had turned on the TV, making sure that the sound was not too loud to prevent you from a headache. Or at least, prevent it from getting worse. Then he came back to you and, without warning, lay down beside you, taking you in his arms. 

“What are you doing?” you said, coughing again.  

“That’s my special technique to help you feel better, an hug attack!” he responds, hugging you more.  

“You know that you can be sick too if you stay so close to me?” 

“i don’t care, I can’t let you go through this alone. If I have to be sick too, then so be it. As long as you feel better after...” 

“Awww, you’re so sweet....thank you Stan.” you replied, kissing his cheek hidden under his hood.  

“Hey! Give me at least one place!” said suddenly Mitch, descending again the ladder.  

And without letting you or his brother answer, Mitch stood on the other side of the bed surrounding you with his arms as well. You couldn't help but laugh as you coughed lightly, these two are real kids. But feeling them both against you, felt good, and warms your heart. 

“If all three of us are sick, we are screwed.” you said laughing a little.  

“Don’t worry about it. We’re much stronger than you think.” said Mitch, kissing your head.  

“ I’m so lucky to have you two.” 

“No, WE are lucky to have you.” replied Stan.  

“Yeah it feels nice to be loved by someone...except Sonya of course.” said Mitch. 

“Heh, I love you guys.” you said kissing their cheek before falling asleep.  

“We love you too. Good night sweets.” 

The two brothers also ended up falling asleep with Tv’s sounds, hugging you to them as best they could. Being in between brought you comfort. Because you knew that no matter what you get, no matter what happens to you, they will always be there.  

You bless the day you met them. Forever. And you wish that nothing will separate you from them, except death.  

But as late as possible.  

*** 

[textingtroublesanswers]

*sniffling and teary eyed, I look up from Bug's shoulder*

Wh-*sniff* what did the entry s-say about his... Ludwig's deal... again? Something about protection? *sniiiiiifffff*t-there was somethin' bout an ambulance too, but I, *sob, hiccup* I can't make any sense of it!

*face returns to Bug's shoulder, hugging them tighter*

-🦖

Bug is shushing you, trying to be as comforting as possible.

"Spy, take a look again, lad. Maybe you missed something."

Jacques looks over the entry, then the next entry, & the next, until finally one seems to yield some sort of result, "July 1946, I turn 38 tomorrow & yet I feel as if no time has passed since my deal with Satan 4 years ago. I have a hypothesis that the deal, & my subsequent meddling with the occult, has slowed down my aging. I cannot prove this, however, until I grow older & see if that is truly the case."

"The war in Europe ended last year, & I'm glad about that, but I've been plagued by nightmares ever since. I see hellfire, I see my father & stepmother, I see myself as this masked persona I have created, & I'm scared. But then I wake up & the fear disappears, as fast as it arrived. One dream, however, won't let me be, & it leaves me shaking & sweating when I wake up. One of these days Mitch, the Heavy, will hear me screaming in the night & will barge into my room when I'm unmasked. I can't have that, he might recognise my face from the newspaper, & then he might turn me over to the authorities. They will never believe me that I killed General Somerton out of self defense, how could they when I am who I am?"

"Anyway, my dream. In it, I am accosted by those thugs again. They shatter my violin & rip open my grandfather's grimoire, & as I fight back one of them shoots me. Unlike in real life, I don't manage to kill all of them, & they run. Someone calls an ambulance for me, like in real life, but there is no Satan, there is no god, & no one comes to drag me away from the scene before the police & the paramedics arrive. Sometimes my wounds kill me, although the position of the gunshot wound should not be able to do that. I hate it when my dreams are medically inaccurate, I didn't study for five years for my own mind to disregard that."

"Sometimes the wounds don't kill me, which is the worse option. My mind skips over the hospital, & the prison, & the deportation, but it lingers on the camps, & it lingers on the sight of my father in prison rags, even though I know he died before he let them drag him away. I see him there, with a face like death itself, & he is smiling at me, welcoming me into his open arms. He asks me how I enjoyed America, if I enjoyed the hunger, the pain, the fear. He asks me if I missed the cushy life I led in Germany, as the daughter of a famous doctor, instead of living as an outlaw & a vagabond away from my home country. He mocks me, all the while smiling at me & telling me how much he missed me. Telling me the sweet things my father would have never stooped low enough to say."

"My deal with the Devil ensures that I won't be deported, that I won't be found as long as I don't bring attention to myself. I've since talked to other demons, made sacrifices in blood & bodies, done everything so that I may survive in this pointless war over gravel. All my days are filled with the anxiety & fear over someone figuring me out, finding out who I really am. It's worse than when I lived with Vogel, & I hate it, & the dreams won't let me forget. But, thanks to my deal, I am alive & safe, & when my contract is over & the next poor fool takes my place, I will be able to get out of here & do something I actually love. Maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to get my medical license back, maybe I'll be able to practice medicine & actually live without fear."

"My contract is up in a year, & I don't know what I'll do when I leave BLU. I never want to work for Mann Co. again but they pay so well & they provide me with protection. We'll see, we'll see. For now, I have a new formula for sleeping meds I want to try out. Hopefully, tomorrow, it will at most make me face Heavy's wrath, & not Satan's. Alright, that wasn't funny, but I do hope it doesn't kill me or make me oversleep again. The lock on my door can only take so much before it breaks."

[misshoneyimhome]

Lover I Frederik Andersen

Tags: ex-boyfriend!Freddie; Frederik AndersenxReader; Fullf; Wedding; 

”Lover” – Taylor Swift'

Word count: 1.6K

➼｡ﾟ

We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January And this is our place, we make the rules And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?

The day had been nothing short of amazing. Stephanie was the most beautiful bride, you’d ever seen in real life, and the ceremony had left no eye dry. Mitch had looked so proud, standing there, seeing the love of his life walking towards him; about to say yes to be his forever. 

It was simply wonderful.

And you’d had a great time as well. Seeing one of your best girlfriends marrying the love of her life; her best friend, made you feel warm and deeply happy for her. And of course, you’d make it your life’s mission to hunt down Mitch if he’d ever break her heart; but in this very moment of ‘I do’s’ and vows, you had no doubt they were made for each other. 

The only little tinge you felt in your chest, was caused by the gazing honey brown eyes, belonging to none other than your gorgeous of a ginger ex-boyfriend/former lover: Frederik Andersen. 

You and Freddie had history – not a long one, but history, nonetheless.

Freddie had very casually walked straight into your heart back in 2019, when he was the starting goaltender for the Toronto Maple Leafs, the moment Stephanie had introduced you to the team and their significant others. You’d come to know Stephanie through another girlfriend of yours, and your quickly growing friendship had made her take you in and made you a part of the inner circle of the hockey team. 

Something you’d never even dreamt of in your life but was so grateful for had happened. 

And you enjoyed every second of it. Every game, every team event, and not to mention, every time Freddie had looked at you. If someone asked you, if you believed in love at first sight, this was probably the closest you’d come to experience it. Because it must have been love - And Freddie had not held back in expressing his feelings for you, and bluntly asked you out.

So that was your history: one year of pure joy and happiness; amazing sex, laughter, comfort post losses, and genuine heart-warming feelings. 

Unfortunately, your fairy-tale had been cut short, when Freddie was to move to the Hurricanes in North Carolina, and you were unable to move with him. Not only because you’d only been going out for a year, but also because you’d just started your new job after an important promotion, you’d worked so hard for. 

And it’s not that you didn’t want to move with Freddie, but he simply couldn’t live with himself if he knew that it’d been his fault that you’d have to give up on your career and start all over – just so he could have his. No, it wasn’t fair, and eventually you’d agreed. 

The first couple of months went well though; you tried to talk every day and keep each other updated of your whereabouts, but then it grew too hard for the both of you. The distance alone just made you fall apart – and it had been Freddie who’d eventually been the one to rip off the bandage. 

Although it’d hurt, you knew it was for the best. 

So here you both were, at the party of a wedding between your very close friends. Both standing in a room, filled with nothing but joy, laughter, and romance. And Freddie simply couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. You were gorgeous. 

He could tell that you’d spent hours getting ready; your hair and make-up were flawless, but what was truly captivating was your smile. The dimples by your lips, that you’ve always hated so such, but he loved so wholeheartedly, because it meant that you were happy. 

Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close forever and ever? And ah, take me out, and take me home You're my, my, my, my Lover

As you were standing there, talking to some of the other guests with a drink in your hand, it was like Freddie’s feet moved all by themselves. The magnetic attraction between the two of you, made him slowly yet determined walk in your direction; and as you felt his presence near you, you turned around and as your eyes met the soft expression on his alluring, handsome face, your heart melted all over again.   

“Please, dance with we?” he simply asked, husky words softly escaping his lips, and as an automatic response, your head nodded, and your mouth spoke the word ‘yes.’

We could let our friends crash in the living room This is our place, we make the call And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all

One of his hands, softly took one of yours, and his other hand was placed on your hip, as your available hand gently took its place on his shoulder. You knew people were looking, but there was a not a drop of care within either of you – both just simply enjoyed and embraced he gentle touches and the air you shared between you. 

It was like everything was coming back to you, a monsoon of emotions washing over your body, mind, and soul. And oh, how it felt so good. 

As the two of you swayed softly to the music playing from the speakers, you were in a world of your own. His arms stretched to push out apart, swing you around, and then pull you back into his body. His large, warm, and solid body. The body you knew oh so well; you’d seen naked on multiple occasions; you’d been intimate with, touched, and kissed – the body of the man you’d love for three years. 

And it looked good in a suit. Freddie’s always had a great taste in suits, and you’d never held back on your compliments of the matter. But tonight, he looked exceptionally good. The summer had done him well, given him a light tan, almost brightening his already fierce ginger hair. He shone nothing but confident and self-awareness, as he once again starched his arms, pushing you apart, and then pulling you back in again.  

And then he held you tightly.

Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close forever and ever? And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever) You're my, my, my, my Lover

“You look beautiful,” he whispered delicately into your ear, and you felt a shiver run down your spine. His voice, the words, his breath; he had you wrapped around his finger all over again. 

You offered him a sweet smile. 

“Thank you,” you simply replied, as your eyes locked and you again swayed from side to side, holding each other closely. 

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand? With every guitar string scar on my hand I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue All's well that ends well to end up with you Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover

Gently, he once again repeated the dance moves, but this time as he’d pulled you back into him, he held your hands between your chests, one still resisting on your waist, and leaned his forehead against yours. Both of you almost closed your eyes, as you leaned into each other, and mentally left the room, only letting yourself be aware of the music. You were mesmerised. Lost in another life – in a life with only you and Freddie. 

“I’ve missed you,” his words were smooth and soft, his breath warm, and his heartbeat steady. His words worked like magic, making your knees weak and leaving our mind in a haze. 

But then you felt it. The way he’d left your heart hollow when he’d broken up with you. The pain he’d caused when he spoke the words you never thought would be said between you. The dryness in your eyes, after you’d shed every single tear, you had left in you, after he’d given up on your relationship. 

So, you forced yourself to look up at him. And into the deep of his eyes, where you could almost see your own reflection. 

“Don’t play with me.” Your words were shaky, and voice close to trembling.

He kept his eyes locked on yours, and your bodies swayed towards the end of the song; and he knew, it was now or never. Either he spoke the words he so deeply, desperately needed to speak, or he’d lose you for good. 

Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close forever and ever? And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever) You're my, my, my, my Oh, you're my, my, my, my Darling, you're my, my, my, my Lover

“I love you,” he almost whispered. Your pupils were shifting from side to side, as if searching for evidence of truth or lie in his soul. Your breathing increased, your palms got sweaty, and you could feel that oh so familiar and very pleasant tinge of sensation in your fingertips – it was love.

Waves of delicate softness flowed through your veins, as your heart pumped red blood spreading oxygen to your cells, filling the void within your heart with warmth, joy, comfort, and pure happiness. 

Words escaped your mouth, and air left your lungs as you spoke. “I love you too.” 

And as the last melody of the song played its tunes, Freddie’s lips found their way back it their rightful place: to your lips, in a tender kiss. 

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

12.7.24 Saturday-- Saturnsay 3 things Roman God, Planet & Rocket. Angel of death spare the life of nana...

8:09 am

Still,have windblow...

I didn't know that Mitch played games since the start of "Show Time" ....Did she give me a simple battery? Or they are just happy without me around???

Maturity is a thing to be respected on each other.

This will be the saddest part of my life knowing that some old friends, new people that I met coming from different "walks of life" they said I'm their FRIEND, hoping even some relatives until 4th or 5th or 6th or 7th or must be on 8th and 9th degree until it is fading,hoping and praying they take the word FRIEND from the heart. Praying and hoping as well some distant chinese friends will be on mutual... No 6 and I must go in? Go in where? THINGS THAT I DON'T KNOW EVER SINCE LIKE SINCE 2007? I know they have the power to do religious act of switching spirit!

I really can't understand...Go in where??? No one explains to me... Go in where? In the manhole???

The "GAME ONLY ENDS WHEN WE SAY IT ENDS" .....by: Escape Room ( done,watching Tournament of Champions )..

It is just fucking weird and unfair in my part when I met "hammer" ... I met him 2007? But he judged my heart, he judged my entire being... For Minos, the game maker,that a hammer sees everyone as a nail.

Hammer means your truth is your truth! That probably they put me or us in a game or I just included myself coz I'm completing the puzzle pieces.Based on the movie "That every single thing you see is a CLUE" like I love ish!!!

You will never know the answer coz you don't take hints and clues seriously... I tried to move forward coz ish is really my blood related someone. But they didn't take me seriously for 17 years they just enjoy each other's company and they just love me just like this a flat poops!

Then, they will take away ish from me and be the first one then they made me a 2nd choice???

"Everything you see reinforces your existing belief so that you will be in an endless loop" because you guys wanted to be in a loop of forever young and leaving me just like a flat poops! But Minos loves me,hoping he is having a fair heart. Like if Mitch or if anyone started their own game since 2007? Without telling it to me until these days probably my aunt Wena ( my Aunt who is part of NBI ) is included on that game. "The game is all there and all there is the game".

Can I give that as a punishment?

Blood is thicker than water! Oil is the friendship in my water.

In the movie there is a train... Remember the train? But here they gave you a punisher train coz all you wanted is to win the game for the money or fame! Everyone is SELFISH in that game since 2007!

Since,they gave you a "punisher train" it is not an actual truck it will be uncoupled coz the game maker knew that you guys didn't want me around or you didn't even tell me directly... What's goin' on???

There will be no emergency break! Probably it is happening on them they are now on an "abandoned station" coz the game maker knew that they are all selfish, they just wanna get the money and fame for themselves to win the game. For her or him to prove that she or he can, what's inside her or his heart is to be unfair or having an arrogant heart that I can win this game on my own ways...I wanna remove Peachy, coz we don't need Peachy at all!

Probably, the game maker will remove the signal or simply will not link to them as a punishment but I'm here so the game maker will bend a lil to save me, to save Peachy...

The game maker in the movie they can hi-jacked the train or reinforce the door. To punish the players coz they said they don't need Peachy at all!!!

The game maker planned to make all trains uncoupled! To be fair on Peachy or on me? I've been here all alone planning good things for my family and friends and I'm open to good hearted people to be my friend. I know I'm a friend or I can be a friend of the game maker.

The game maker knew me ever since that I was the leather one here, so the game maker open the door to have some links on people who claimed that they are for me but I don't know what's inside their heart.

The game maker ordered "All false advertising must be pulled" ( tokens are behind the ads ). They need to complete the 9 tokens while in the punisher train. 9 tokens someone real and religious for them to be saved...

The players said they are for me that they needed money for me? But game maker observation when they can get some rights,they remove Peachy. Game maker gave them the hard time to claim the 9 tokens for them to go onto the next level or to claim money.... But what is the motive? What are their hearts???

Game maker said find the keys to cut the rubber. On 8th token it says "Lose yourself to get tokens".

Then, probably for the bad hearts it will be hanged man!

When the players got the 9 tokens the door open but it went down....Going down... ( vlog theme inspired from the movie THE ESCAPE TOURNAMENT OF CHAMPIONS ).

10:09 am

Still,have windblow....

Thanks,Crysette for the pancit and some white bread for me and John....

10:21 am

Still,have windblow...

Done eating with John probably will have late lunchie coz we seldom eat breakfast or this is considered BRUNCH or my intermittent diet...

Let's continue on the movie with a blend of my vlog inspired from the movie The Escape ( tournament of champions ).

Here in the movie there are 6 players but probably they started 500 then went to 100 then 50 then there are chosen 6 groups or 6 people came from different organizations. But me? I wanna suggest a 12 groups to the game maker if we are gonna do some games again... I will call it heart-hurt games, real or not only real can suvive.

Since I said Borgy, I will be on Araneta now... I wanna suggest a heart-hurt games, real or not only real can survive! But Borgy is still on the list of friends probably a 2nd God or facilitator on some royalties games here...

Only good hearts can survive... I still hate Manalo!

There is an organization called illuminati but here in the movie they called it illuminus bank or Bank of Death.

But again this game called "heart-hurt games, real or not only real can survive!".

This is the bank underground, this is legal on some powerful organization but only chosen players, it can be a reward train or a forever punisher train!

This is as well a game of FREE WILL!

I have some lollipops on my tray but what is the motivation? Remember,you will get some papers from the Bank of Death!

This is just purely from the movie itself -- "For the payment following the death of a loved one". ( This case for my people and friends and relatives who are truly into me or genuinely love me, coz I'm also asking a mercy on my nana. For the angels of death still spare her life. Allow good people to have a bit of right to get some alms or cash from the bank of Death. But the kind of DEATH that I want is killing my soul with love and respect ).

There is Sonya.... Probably, she is the Goddess who is managing the bank bills. But the rule in the movie put some blood on it...

In my game rule, I wanna suggest to game maker to not put a standard on Sonya. I mean Sonya can be a shorty girl like me or there will be an another Sonya who is taller than me and an another Chubby Sonya.

Good Luck Sonya! Wanted Sonya!!??? This is heart-hurt games, real or not only real can survive!

Blood Money-- this is the term called when someone got paid for a death, came from the Bank of Death.

The main pincode in the movie is 0526! They wanted to open the vault of money. In New York it is 12:09, 3:02 in London and 12:03 in Shanghai.

The illuminous Bank Vault has a written words: "Plot the course by the hours of the day.... Count the minutes every step of the way".

Again, I have different lollipops on my tray and be careful on the tiles you walk-on....What is the motivation of anyone, for getting my lollipops on my tray???

This will be a difficult game for a bad hearts ( atrimitidah )they keep on interfering on me again....Game maker wanted a religious 9 hearts of diamonds.

But in the movie for them to pass the challenge to get into vault it should be 9 straight tiles then 3 going to the right then 3 going forward most specially in Shanghai. But in New York it is a war zone... In London it is final it must be forever!!!

In the movie "Money makes the world turn. Don't let it stop or else it all end". It is now HEXAGON NOT PENTAGON....

But I believed I'm the friend of the game maker... I wanna twist the game into Hepatagon or Octagon but what is the free will for stealing or getting my lollipops on my trays???

The black tiles can be a positive one if everyone will maintain the transparency on our map. I should know as well,angels!

In the beach there will be 2 way out, it is either going to refrigerator or going up to the light house.

In the movie they wanted the anchor to stop on Hour Glass Bay ( this is just those amazon women but they wanted to suggest to lift the lil boat like me ). In my game all are open to join not just Sonya the hour glass body or the amazon hottie.... Give a fair treatment on us the lil brides of the future...

But sometimes the Lighthouse opearator will say "I can't SEA you" coz there are so many hour glass amazons that are probably wicked they are meant to be waved!

For some players they acquired the sickness of microdeletion of genes. It will affect their sensation and they can't feel physical pain or heart pain.

I truly enjoy watching this movie of The Escape Room the tournament of Champions coz it is a movie game and reality game movie.

( vlog for today above inspired by the movie THE ESCAPE ROOM, tournament of champions ).

11:51 am

Still,have windblow...

I feel bitterish... I feel ugly.. Back to my reality, I wanna travel and buy Starbucks everyday... I can't meet anyone that I like here most specially I'm a bummer these days... I wanna leave Cavite if I can't get progress... I wanna get my cousin-white or Daniel coz I've seen no one here.. I wanna get some progress and get some vanities. I feel jealous on some old fakers friends... I need job and money angels! I need job and money...

12:43 noon

Still have windblow...

Mitch can't go up without telling it to me coz I'm genuiene 9 hearts of diamonds. Just don't touch my cousin's most specially the cousin-white without me on the scene! Or it will be hatred forever! Did she give me those simple batteries? Is Mitch met by Borgy already? Even on my cousin's most specially my most loved cousin white... Have a pause!!!

3:07 pm

Still,have windblow...

Don't be a traitor... Spare the life of nana... Don't make John cry he is now sleeping... From the past weeks John is crying while he is sleeping, something bad happened to nana...

Again, this will be the saddest if nana can't go back to her existence knowing that some relatives and friends and some chinese friends who can do the religious act of switching of spirit. Don't be a traitor you are just nearby...

The possibility if they will not survive nana the group of relatives and some people that I know let's say friends who are having the rituals will think of the next step on me....How can they be closer to me? It is a weird traitor plan... or they will just be on a distance... But knowing the situation, I know nana can go back to her existence... Is Denosta linking on the ritual of religious act as well? Is Denosta part of Cavite now?

Again, the bf that I want now are Daniel and most specially my most loved cousin-white... I need a bf these days that I want... But how can I get them,where???

3:34 pm

Still,have windblow...

Me and John will pray later for mama Trining...

It is weird that I bought a powerbank but instead of making my charge to go up,it went down angels....This is a wrong power bank???

Let's try again, I changed the cable wire.

4:07 pm

Still,have windblow...

It went up already! I'm happy angels! I just changed the cable wire..

Thanks Lazadah! This is just 125 pesoses!

7:16 pm

Still,have windblow...

Thanks, for my 3 pamangkin'z they brought us a chicken with spaghetti & green peas et al on a white sauce.

Phem2x, Jaja and Edan.

The powerbank is not that good,not fast charging and easily drain....

So, we prayed awhile ago me and John for our nana's recovery in a lil while though it will take time...

I wanna have a bf that I want like Daniel and my cousin-white coz I have no exposure now and I need a lift, I badly need a lift... But of course I want someone that I think I can be comfortable to be with in a way....The case of my cousin white is really something serious, I feel hatred! I'm aging for nothing... I want a lift!

I still want vanity will tell something on my cousin-white here but does it really matter,still??? If he is already married with someone else? I feel angry and hating him forever that I don't know why...

7:41 pm

Still,have windblow...

Done,eating....He ate the chicken and spaghetti and ate the spam or maling stranogoff instead of beef starnogoff...

10:04 pm

Still,have windblow...

This Crysette went home late...This Harold lately when I locked the gate,I put the padlock after what happened when the time that the friends of Crysette were here and there were 3 people went inside the gate and went straight to their door... Lately,Harold ( brother of Aunt Karen ) and Ivan are always going out...

Then, this Crysette she mentioned twice that why I put a padlock, I said for protection so that no one can go inside and use our gate. This Harold said we shouldn't lock if it is afternoon. I said you don't know the circumstances in life. We are here in the same vicinity, we should have a team work as family. Yeah! There are people coming from other streets or area sometimes they just open our private gate here just to pass through coz they don't have access to the street gate. Our gate here is personal or private gate that's why we created that...

Crysette just went home at 10 pm... The 2 boys went out few minutes ago...

Crysette mentioned twice that why you will lock the gate they can jump on the gate. I said hey! Shut up! Who will jump on the gate, it will not happen coz I will shout out loud! Just lock the gate,I told them I will give them a key, I will look for another padlock by tomorrow...

The possibility the people who would wanted to use the gate,they will pass through using our gate,they will act as one of us here... Hoping everyone here is a family...

10:39 am

Still,have windblow...

So, I already changed the padlock and prepare them their own copy...I will give to Harold later... All I ask is for them to always lock the padlock on our gate as a family here... 10% that there are people who will jump on the gate unless they plan to kill someone here...

No need to put a barb wire there... We've been here for almost 30 years... Hellowie! In this village 30 years already...

10:54 pm

I gave them the copy of their key on the gate... Harold the main holder on the other team beside us, they are our team mates here...

I just told them to always lock the gate even if it is afternoon....

Harold and Ivan on the other house beside us...

[jodilinbio]

Part 46

Written in 2011

Much of 2011 was not a good year, and I am determined to make 2012 better.

Tom got laid off again in early March. Once again, we were thrust into the endless cycle of poverty with no apparent way out, like being stuck on an endless merry-go-round.

Shortly after the layoff, I dreamed he wouldn’t return to work until September. It turned out to be another premonition, as I feared. We were on edge for a couple of weeks before he got hired on as a temp at $13 an hour in a warehouse. I began to feel that the hardship we endured at the motel years ago was meant to prepare me for more challenges. The day we were told our unemployment benefits had ended before he found another job was almost more than I could handle. I honestly don’t know if I would have survived it without what we went through in 2007.

Despite the fears and anxieties that kept me up at night, I became angry that anything that might be up there would allow us to endure so much despite trying to live good lives. It was one thing to not have much extra money; it was another to wonder if we could afford food and rent.

I was also furious with our government for its willingness to send billions of tax dollars overseas while refusing to take care of its own citizens. Doctors were dispatched to aid earthquake and tsunami victims in Japan, Haiti, and elsewhere, but we remained uninsured.

Believing our choices were to slowly starve off on the streets or die more comfortably at home, we even planned to seal ourselves in the bedroom and light charcoal to end things with carbon monoxide poisoning. After half a year of job-hunting, we didn’t believe a miracle was coming.

But it was. Unemployment cut us off on September 16th, and less than two weeks later, Tom was working again. This job seems the most promising yet.

Tom describes the work as physical and some of his coworkers as incompetent, which makes things challenging, but he says it’s not the worst job he’s had. At Christmastime, they had a raffle, and he won a Kindle Fire. I’ve been hooked on it ever since, vowing never to read a physical book again. I love how it doesn’t take up space or collect dust, and how it remembers where I left off.

Another highlight of 2011 was getting books published through Amazon and Smashwords. It was exciting at first, but due to not making a lot of money that way, I decided it was pointless to turn a fun hobby into a job and just write for myself. I still share at times on my blog, though. Plus, there was the risk of pirating.

I’m still in touch with my parents and Tammy, though not her kids or my brother, and I don’t want to be. Tolerating Tammy is hard enough. I do it for my parents’ sake and for whatever inheritance they may want to leave us, but I don’t expect much. I’ve been teased enough with the promise of money to not get my hopes up.

My extended family has mostly shunned me, but I don’t care about them any more than they care about me. There are a lot of bad memories there. Still, I have to admit that without them, I don’t know how we would have made it through some tough times.

Tom’s family doesn’t reach out to us, not even with a simple “hello” from time to time. I hope his mother’s final days are miserable, and I don’t feel the least bit guilty for saying so.

I’m still friends with Andy, Adonis, Maliheh, Alison, Kim, Christine, and Mitch, though Maliheh has been distant, blaming it on illness and busyness. Christine is a blogging friend from Ohio, and Adonis is a nice guy in the Netherlands. Irene and Christiane are friends of Nane that I communicate with that times. Christiane lives in Leipzig and Irene lives in Austria. She met Nane when they both lived in New York. Nane worked on Wall Street and Irene was an au pair.

After 15 months, Nane decided to end things. Andy, Alison, and I think she was toying with my feelings unfairly. When things got rough last fall, she initially seemed supportive. But after two months of silence, she told me she thought I was using her for attention, which hurt and angered me.

On top of that, Kim, Aly, myself, and others are still stalked and harassed by Molly. Last summer, her mother even joined in, making all kinds of bogus legal threats.

[stokesy55]

Plus because they are bonded he will always feel a draw to Patty, no matter how much he wants to hate him

***

ooh the bond makes things so difficult for vk because he wants to love pat and be loved by him in return, but because of his past experiences, he's scared of seeking love in case he doesn't receive it. but the bond is such that no matter how much he tries to push pat away, it hurts him only. vk is stuck in this awkward place where he craves pat's love and care, but is also simultaneously too scared of receiving it lest pat decide to snatch it back when vk doesn't meet his expectations. he has to decide: does he want to give it a shot with pat, or does he want to stay as far as away from him as possible, in case it doesn't work out. unfortunately, he chooses the latter. he's been heartbroken too many times to be hurt again, and he knows if it doesn't work out with pat, it'll hurt him more than any previous relationships did, because of the bond. he knows that if pat hurts him, he'll never get over that hurt. and he doesn't want that for himself. so he withdraws, he never gives pat an opportunity to grow close with him. his logic is that if they aren't close, pat can't hurt him, or at least can't hurt him as much as he could if they end up getting attached. so vk just pines quietly after pat, indulging himself in fantasies of having a happy, healthy relationship with his husband. but every time pat attempts to turn these fantasies into reality, vk pushes him away, afraid of the day pat eventually gets tired of him and leaves him, like everyone else did. he knows that day is going to come regardless, but it would be easier to deal with it if he isn't attached to pat when it happens.

that is initially, before vk finds out about the cheating. when he does, he's just further convinced that nobody will love him for who he is, not even his own bonded alpha. and the walls he's built around his heart get higher and stronger.

then pat ends his affair and comes back to vk, wanting to try again with him. i think by this point, vk has grown self-aware enough, with the help of people around him, to realize that his own actions pushed pat away, he's partially at fault here. but he still hasn't changed enough to want to make it work with pat. to begin with, of course he's scared because what if pat cheats on him with mitch again? he wouldn't survive that hurt, he's sure of that. but also, he's guilty that his own issues were what led pat to desert him, and he knows he's nowhere close to improving. now he knows that he hurt pat too, he's scared of hurting pat again, as well as pat hurting him, and then getting caught in this vicious circle all over again.

so when pat tries to woo vk, vk instead tries to redirect him to mitch, because "he's better for you. he'll treat you better than i can. i already hurt you once, i couldn't live with myself if I do so again. i can't give you the time he can. i can't give you the attention he does. you wanted time right? and care? and love? you better go back to him. i can never love you the way he does, because im far too selfish. i will hurt you again in the process of trying to avoid hurt to myself, and I don't want to risk that. you have a chance of a happy, healthy relationship with mitch. don't give that up because you fancy being a social worker, trying to fix the poor, broken, messed up omega. you can't fix me. nobody can. just go away. i'll hurt you again."

-- psych anon

That’s such an interesting take on VK here. Obviously he has to have self realisation and understanding of how he handled the situation for them to have a chance to grow closer, but I still don’t think VK would ever be that open about how he’s feeling to have such a clear conversation with Pat (because otherwise there wouldn’t be such issues).

The thorn in his side though is once Pat decides he wants it to work with VK and he doesn’t want to be with Mitch anymore, there isn’t anything VK can do to persuade Pat any different. He’ll be like a dog with a bone, not letting go of what he almost lost from being childish and stupid. Pat feels like if he’d just listened to VK, understood his side, saw why he was pushing him away, he could have saved all this hurt and they could have made it work.

Pat blames himself like VK blames himself, but he feels guiltier for also being the betraying party because, no matter what VK felt or did, he NEVER slept with another alpha after they bonded, even though he gave him every reason to.