#and i know that's so frustrating for some people
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
Hi Mae!! I was wondering if you could write something where reader is in the hospital for something and maybe another doctor or nurse doesnât realize sheâs remusâs gf and is being rude to her. And doctor!remus overhears and saves the day lol<3
Thank you for requesting lovely <3
cw: reader who menstruates, mention (not really description) of severe period pains, healthcare gaslighting
doctor!Remus x fem!reader ⥠632 words
âHave you tried taking pain medications like ibuprofen?âÂ
You clench your jaw. âYes, I have.âÂ
âAnd how long has your period lasted?âÂ
âIt started on Tuesday.âÂ
The nurse looks up from his chart, unimpressed. âSo itâs only been a few days.âÂ
âYes, but the pain started before that. And this has been happening forââÂ
âAre you aware that many women experience period pains before the start of their periods?âÂ
Your skin feels hot. Frustrated tears threaten to clog your throat, and you fight the urge to bend over to relieve some of the pain in your abdomen. âYes. I know that.âÂ
âOne a scale from one to ten, how would you rate your pain?âÂ
âEight.â Your voice nearly breaks.Â
Your nurse pushes out a sigh. âIâm sorry to tell you, but thatâs not uncommon either.â He sets down his chart, leveling with you. âListen, we treat a lot of really sick and hurting people here. We have lots of patients to get to today, so if you think what youâre experiencing could be normal period painââ
âExcuse me?â The nurse falls silent as Remus pulls aside the curtain, stepping into your little room. You have to shove down the urge to cry just for seeing him. He looks between the two of you, seemingly confused but obviously displeased. âWhatâs going on?âÂ
âHi,â you offer meekly.
Your nurse turns to Remus with a long-suffering look thatâs nearly conspiratorial as well. Itâs clear he expects to be agreed with. âDoctor Lupin, sorry to waste your time. Youâre welcome to check her out, but after an initial interview weâre fairly certain sheâs experiencing regular menstrual cramps.âÂ
Your face flames at his use of we. You hadnât agreed to any of that.Â
âItâs not a waste,â Remus says, clipped. âI asked her to come here, because her menstrual cramps are abnormally severe and prolonged, and Iâve already ordered an ultrasound to find out why. Are you in the habit of deterring our patients from seeking care?âÂ
Your boyfriendâs tone grows increasingly agitated as he speaks, and you watch with a guilty sort of satisfaction as the blood drains from the nurseâs face.Â
When he offers up no answer, Remusâ expression hardens. âIâve got it from here. Find me later, please.âÂ
You barely get to see your nurse leave. Remus steps closer to you, eclipsing your view, the anger in your boyfriendâs expression melding into concern.
âHi, honey.â His hand wraps around your arm. âHow is it today?âÂ
You feel your face crumple under his caring gaze. âA little better,â you manage.Â
Remus makes a sympathetic sound, thumb sweeping gently over your skin. âStill nauseous?âÂ
âYeah.âÂ
âDid he ask you to rate your pain?âÂ
âMhm.âÂ
âAnd what did you say?âÂ
You shrug. Youâre never sure how accurate you are with these scales. âI said an eight. It might be a seven, though, I justâ âyour voice cracksâ âwanted him to believe me.âÂ
 âOh, baby.â Remus wraps you up in a hug, cupping your head to his chest. âIâm sorry he treated you that way, sweetheart. It was completely out of order. Iâm not going to let it happen to anyone else, Iâm so sorry.âÂ
âItâs okay,â you say tightly. âIâm fine, and itâs not your fault.âÂ
Remus makes a tsking sound like he doesnât quite agree. âWhy didnât you tell him you were with me?â
You shrug, a bit bashful. âI didnât want to, like, name drop you.âÂ
Remus smiles, shaking his head in astoundment. âYouâre absurd.â He gives your cheek a loving hold. His eyes lock on yours, steady and earnest. âWeâre going to sort this, alright?â
âOh, donât involve me, please. Talk to him after Iâm gone.âÂ
âI mean your cramps,â Remus laughs. He presses a kiss to your forehead. âBut yes, after youâre gone.â
#doctor!remus lupin#doctor!remus x reader#remus lupin au#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x fem!reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin x self insert#remus lupin fanfiction#remus lupin fanfic#remus lupin fic#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin scenario#remus lupin drabble#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin one shot#remus lupin oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders x reader
716 notes
¡
View notes
Text
It's a Love Story - Chapter 8
Summary:
Azriel's shadows find their master a wife.
Azriel would just really like his heart not to get broken again.
And Sky...well, she's just really surprised that that far too handsome male is interested in her at all.
Warning:
Rhys Bashing (as usual), I classified this as Azriel x OC, even when it't technically Azriel x Sellyn Drake (but we kinda know nothing about Sellyn Drake other than that she writes books so Sky is kinda an OC), Cassian is kinda a good guy for once, Azriel has a horrible time, as usual... Stuttering, toxic families (For once I do not mean the IC), Self-Esteem Issues, Secret Identity, Body Image Issues, Fat Shaming, People being utterly horrible. Racism against Illyrians/Lesser Faes?
If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please take care of your own mental health and don't read it.
Sky didnât have much of a temper.
Even if she was frustrated or annoyed, she rarely got angry or lost her patience.Â
It wasn't that she didn't have emotions. She did. She felt things deeply, passionately. However, she also believed that there was no point in wasting energy on getting angry. It didn't solve anything. It only made things worse.Â
So Sky had learned a very, very long time agoâŚthat there was no need to start screaming, because her stutter didnât allow her that anywayâŚand that maybeâŚmaybe it was easier for her to just let go off her anger about being unfairly treated.Â
Getting angry wouldnât help her.Â
That day howeverâŚit burst out of her. Burst out of her like somebody had lanced an abscess.Â
Her family could say whatever they wanted about her. But they were not going to say a single word about AzrielÂ
It was Winter Solstice.
Azriel and her had spent the last month or so enjoying winter season in VelarisâŚeven once trying to ice skate on their lake, which only ended with him kissing her skinned knees, because she was definitely not a natural at it.
They had bought Winter Solstice gifts, and baked cookiesâŚhad decorated their house with pine garlands and velvet ribbonsâŚ
She had knitted them socks and they had made rabbit stews out of rabbits Azriel had hunted in the forest behind their house. (It wasâŚshe had never really seen him as a warrior, even when he wore these black leathers and the blue stone that glinted off himâŚbut she could see him as a hunter, when he came home with a couple of rabbits, ready for dinner. It had also resulted in a new fur lined blanket for her, all ready on the couch.Â
She had never outright askedâŚbut he seemd to like it when she was cuddled beneath it, like it seemed to soothe some kind of instinct for him. Maybe the fact that it was the animal he had hunted?)  Â
Sky and Azriel had both made the decision to spend the days with their respective families and have their own Solstice celebrations the next dayâŚthat would pretty much sonsits out of a lazy day in bed and nothing else.Â
It sounded amazing. Just what they wanted.Â
And it had made sense to celebrate like that. She hadnât wanted to be the one to keep him from his family after all, even if the thought of not spending Solstice with her mate had hurt more than she wanted to admit.
Azriel had been up ridiculous easily in the morning for a snowball fight that was apparently traditionâŚbut not before he had spent a good half hour making her scream his name with his mouth between her thighsâŚ
Afterwards, she had gotten dressed and left the shadows to amuse Hector for the day⌠and Sky had left to help her mother with dinner preparations.
A nice, quiet family dinner. Nothing more and nothing less.
Thatâs what it was supposed to be. They didnât even get that far.
It all went to shit before dinner was even in the oven.Â
From the moment she entered her parents house it was a barrage of barbed comments. About her appearance, her stutter, her lack of an boyfriendâŚher lack of a proper job. (Sellyn Drake was hers. Sellyn Drake was nothing they got to gossip about.)Â
Sky had bitten her tongue. She had ignored the comments, tried to enjoy herself. But Claire never knew when enough was enough.
Her sister kept at it. Kept needling, jabbing at Sky until the little bubbles of anger popped to the surface and boiled into somethingâŚbigger.
âIâŚI met my mâŚmate,â Sky finally said flatly, after anther jab at her lack of a boyfriend.Â
Take that Claire. Not just a fiance. A mate.Â
Finally in just one thing Sky had been faster than her sister.Â
A mate. That mystical rare mating bond had been a gift from the other for her and not for Claire.Â
It caught Claire off guard. She stopped pacing, and turned to look at her sister, brow raised. The look said âOh is that so?â as if it was the kind of nonsense she had come to expect from her.
âDonât be ridiculous,â she scoffed, clearly not believing a word Sky said.Â
But Sky wasnât going to let this go. âHis n..name is Azriel,â Sky said with a smile. âWe are verâŚvery hapâŚhappy.âÂ
They were. They were so happy. So delightfully happy. (So delightfully happy that Sky had been wondering if maybeâŚmaybe the should start trying. High Fae fertility was hit or miss anywayâŚwhy shouldnât they simply start trying and see where it would take them. And if it took two decades, then it took two decades. If it only took a year or threeâŚwell, then they were lucky.) Â
Claire narrowed her eyes. She was about to say something mean, Sky could see it in the way her lip curled up.
âHeâŚHe's a gâŚgood male,â she said firmly, cutting Claire off before she got the chance to spew out anything else.
Claire laughed. It was a harsh, biting sound.
"A good male? Really, Sky?" she sneered. "You actually fell for that line?"
It wasnât a line. It was the truth.Â
Azriel was a good male. Patient and intense and loving. He had never raised a single finger against her.Azriel would never hurt her intentionally.Â
 Claire just wanted to belittle Sky in front of their whole family.
"You must be even more naive than you seem if you believe that," she said, almost pityingly. "You really think he wants you? That he actually cares about you? Nobody could want you. I bet he just pities you."
It should have hurt her, she realised. It would have. Even just months ago, it would have hurt her.Â
But right nowâŚright now it didnât really.Â
She was supposed to believe that Azriel didnât want her? The same male that had spent the better part of an hour on his knees in front of her that very morning, eating her out like a starved male? She was supposed that her mate, whoâs arousal shot across the bond like an inferno any time she slipped off her clothes, didnât want her? That the same male that stared at her like she was a goddess, that spent hours worshipping her body with his handsâŚthat she had nearly made come simply by touching his wings a few days ago didnât want her?Â
StillâŚClaire's words had their effect. She felt a small stab of doubt in her heart, and she hated it. She hated that her sister could still hurt her like this, still make her feel like that insecure little girl who stuttered and couldn't get a single word right.
âHeâŚHe lâŚloves me and IâŚI love him,â Sky said calmly.
That was clear in every single one of his actions, in every single word.Â
âWhere did you even meet him?â Skyâs mother demanded. âAnd what kind of name is Azriel?â
âInâŚIn a bar. WhâŚWhen we went out for Cl..Claireâs Hen Do. And I imâŚimagine itâs an IlâŚillyrian name.â
Everything ground to a halt.
âHeâs Illyrian?!â Her mother demanded sharply. âWhatâs wrong with you, Skylar!â
Sky flinched at her tone. It was harsh, angry. It was the same tone she'd always used when Sky was younger and got anything wrong or stepped out of line.
"Yes, he's IlâŚIlllyrian," she said, meeting her mother's gaze levelly. "What'sâŚwhatâs wrong with that?" she asked.Â
She knew that her family wasnât theâŚmost open about Lesser Faes, butâŚbut that hatred in her motherâs voiceâŚ.she hadnât expected that.Â
âEverything,â Admon gave back with a snort. âYou seriously let that barbarian fuck you? I am surprised you actually survived that and he didnât just rip you apart.â
Every bit of colour leeched out of her face, except her ruddy red cheeks at these crude words.Â
This was Admon. Once upon a time, she had wanted to marry him. To have his children. To spent her life with him.Â
AndâŚand this was what he told her to her face.Â
âI canât believe that you even let a creature like him touch you,â her mother breathed staring at her with utter disgust.
âHeâ...Heâs not a creâŚcreature,â Sky bit out. Azriel was her mate.Â
âIs it true by the way?â Her brother wondered. âThat Illyrianâs have a catâs prick?â
"Orin!" her mother exclaimed, aghast. "Don't be vulgar! I don't want to know."
Orin shrugged, a smirk dancing across his face. "What? Iâm just curious. I am sure Skylar knows. She must please him somehow when sheâs still alive to enjoy theirâŚcouplings.â
Sky felt ill. She didn't know what to say, what to say in defense of the man she loved. She couldn't get a word out.
âDid youâŚdid you let it touch you?â Her father demanded finally, his voice icy.
It. Not even him. It. Like Azriel was a thing.Â
Sky felt her heart drop to the floor, breaking into pieces.
"Yes," she admitted, her voice barely audible.
Her father's face grew stony, and he took a step closer to her.
âHow dare you?â he hissed. "How could you let a monster touch you like that?"
"He's not a monster!" Sky protested, her voice rising. "He'sâŚHeâs kâŚkind and genâŚgentle, and-"
âAnd I am sure, he keeps you stuffed with his cat prick to keep you satisfied,â Claire drawled.
And Sky was done.
Somehow that was the last straw.Â
Somehow that made something inside her break, irreparable.Â
It snipped away every thread that ever kept her close to the family that she had been born into.Â
âAt least I didnât need to take my sisterâs slâŚsloppy sâŚseconds,â Sky said, her voice flat, meeting her gaze full on.âAnd yes, Azriel more than keeps me sâŚsatisfied.â
Silence descended over the room, the only sound the soft crackle of the fire in the hearth. Sky felt the tension in the air grow heavier with each passing second.
"YouâŚyou didnât just say that,â Claire said coldly. "You take that back, Sky.
Sky raised her chin defiantly. "No.â she said simply. âI'mâŚIâm not taking back the truth," she said, her voice ringing with unexpected steel.
"You do not speak to me like that," Claire hissed. "You have no rightâ"
Something inside Sky snapped. Years of frustration, years of feeling invisible and ignored, years of enduring Claire's taunts and jibes all bubbled to the surface.
"IâŚI have evâŚevery right," she shot back, her heart pounding in her chest. âNot so fun when you are on the reâŚreceiving end, is it?â
âEither you end yourâŚdalliance withâŚthat creature, or you are no daughter of mine,â her father snapped.
He talked to her like she was nothing. Like she was worth less than dirt beneath his boots.Â
And somehow that made it even easier.Â
âYou want me to turn away my mateâŚfor what? This?â She asked him, cocking her head to the side. .
"For the sake of our familyâs reputation," her father said. "You are an embarrassment to us all by associating with thatâŚlesser fae barbarian.â
Barbarian. Lesser Fae. Thing. Creature. Monster.
All of that said about the male she loved. About her mate.Â
âHeâs Illyrian,â Sky said, her voice icy.Â
âOh come off it,â âOrin snapped. âHeâs lesser fae. The only thing they are good for is being fodder for the armies during war times. Other than that, they are worthless.â
Fodder.Â
âWe have Lesser Fae ancestry ourself,â Sky responded icily. âOur great grandmother was a River Nymph.â
"That was a long time ago," her father interrupted sharply. "It was one ancestor generations ago. And besides, her blood was not that strong to begin with."
Sky thought back to the eyes that looked back from her mirror each day. Blue and beautiful. The one trace of her that got passed down to her.
"Maybe it was her blood that made you think that opening your legs for that creature was in any way appropriate," her mother hissed.Â
And suddenly it was so easy.Â
âAzriel is my mate,â she hissed. âI will alâŚalways chose him over you. You can spew what..whatever insult you want about him or his peâŚpeoople. Heâs still a betâŚbetter male than any of you could ever hope to be, has treated me better than any of you. Iâll gladly no longer be your daughter.â
She felt the sting of tears running down her cheeks, but she didn't try to wipe them away. She just stared back at her family, daring them to say more. There was a short moment of silence, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife.
She should have expected it. Her mother had always been quick to slap her if she did anything anything that she didnât like.
Just this timeâŚher hand didnât make contact.
Sky stared at the tendril of shadows that jerked her motherâs hand back, having suddenly appeared.Â
*You. Will. Not. Lay. A. Finger. On. Her,* the shadows hissed menacingly.
Sky stared at the shadows, her eyes widening in shock. They were angry. No. Furious. Utterly and completely furious. Her mother seemed equally taken aback, her hand still outstretched in the air where the shadows had stopped her.
Orin looked like he was about to piss himself, and her fatherâŚher father stared at the shadows, his face ashen.
âCome here,â Sky said quietly.
The shadows left her mother to come swarming to her, brushing over her cheek in greeting before wrapping themselves around her neck in a clearly possessive move.
Sky felt the familiar warmth of the shadows sink into her, a small bit of comfort in this awful situation. She turned to her family, her jaw set.
"IâmâŚIâm never coming back," she said, her voice quiet but resolute. And with that, she turned and walked away, She had only taken a handful of steps when she stopped and turned back, one last thing needing to be said, before she closed the door on this chapter of her life forever.
"I never want to see any of you again," she said, her voice shaking only slightly. "And when we have children, donât you dare come and ask to have anything to do with them. You donât deserve to even breath the same air as my mate."
With that, she turned and walked away, her head held high.Â
***
Whatever went on between sky and her familyâŚit wasnât good. He could feel that in the bond slumbering underneath his breast bone.
He rubbed it absentmindly, staring in the flickering flame of the Birchin.
He had won that Snowball fight. Once more. One more victory to add to it. Not that he particularly cared right now.
*Is she alright?* he asked the shadows.
The shadows wereâŚquiet. And that spoke volumes. Something wasn't right. Azriel's heart pounded against his chest, his instincts urging him to act. He had to make sure Sky was alright. He couldn't stand to think about her being in any sort of trouble.
*Physicallly unharmed,* the shadows promised. *Her family is horrible,* they told him distastefully.Â
Azriel's heart clenched at the shadowâs words. While it was a small relief that Sky wasn't physically hurtâŚher family being horrible made him want to grimace.Â
âAlright, I had it!â Cassian snapped at that moment. âWhat the fuck is going on with you two?â
Azriel turned to his brother, seeing Cassian watch Rhys and himself with an expression ofâŚsomething. Exasperation maybe.
"What do you mean?" Azriel asked, his voice even, feigning ignorance. He was really not in the mood to get into that either. But apparently he wasnât going to get that small bit of mercy.Â
"Donât play dumb with me, brother," Cassian said, rolling his eyes. "You are both moody and more distant than usual. What the heck happened?"
âI donât know what you are talking about,â Azriel said flatly. Cassian rolled his eyes.
âRhys?â Cassian demanded with a sigh.Â
âYou want to explain or shall I?â Rhys addressed him and Azriel just looked at him flatly.
âYou gave the orders, High Lord.â
If Azriel had been in a better mood, he would have smirked. But right now, he just wanted this whole conversation to be over so he could check on Sky. The thought of her made his chest ache. He longed to see her, to hold her, to make sure she's alright. But he knew that Cassian and Rhys wouldnât let him go without an explanation.
âAzriel and IâŚhad a disagreement about Elain.â Azriel just stared at Rhys blankly. Seriously, that was the best Rhys could come up with? Thatâs what he wanted to go with?!
"A disagreement?" Cassian asked, brows raised. "What kind of disagreement? A 'we came to an agreement' kind of disagreement, or a 'we punched each other in the face' disagreement?"
âA âRhys sticks his nose into things that are none of his businessâ disagreement,â Azriel gave back drily.
âExcuse me, you were going to kiss ELain while her mate was under the same roof two years ago. Did you ever even consider the political ramifications of that?â Rhys snapped. âFor gods sake, Azriel!â
Azriel's jaw clenched at Rhys's words, his temper flaring even as he tried to maintain a neutral expression. "You think I didn't consider the consequences? Of course, I did," he hissed, his voice dangerously low. "But feelings aren't logical, Rhys. We don't choose who we fall for, and it's not as simple as calculating political ramifications."
âI told Azriel to keep away from Elain. She fell for Lucien. Heâs still moping about it and giving me the fault,â Rhys said flatly. âOut of pure interest, how much longer do you want to keep up with that, Az?â
Azriel couldnât help the laugh that burst out od his mouth at that.
âYou didnât just fucking tell me to keep away from her. You told me and I quote âIf you need to fuck somebody go to a pleasure hall and pay for itâ,â Azriel repeated viciously.
"And I stand by that," Rhys snapped. "The last thing we need is for you to pine over someone who has made it clear where she stands. Elain has her mate, and she doesn't return your feelings. Sheâs married for godsâ sake!â
âWhoa!â Cassian cut them off. âWhat the fuck, Rhys?!â
"What?" Rhys demanded, glaring at Cassian.
Cassian gave him an incredulous look. "You told Azriel to go to a pleasure hall? Seriously?"
"I was trying to be helpful," Rhys said, his jaw clenching.
"Helpful?" Cassian asked incrediously. "Helpful would have been to be a little more understanding towards your brother's feelings. He does have them, you know,â Cassian said sarcastically.Â
"I know that," Rhys snapped. "But he needs to move on. It's not healthy to keep pining after someone who doesn't return his feelings."
âWhere was this opinion for the 500 years of me pining after Mor?â Azriel snapped.Â
Rhys's expression darkened. "Don't do that, Azriel. Don't bring Mor into this. She's not relevant to this discussion."
âNot relevant?â Azriel gave back with a laugh. âI think sheâs very relevant. You donât trust me to act like an adult about my feelings. You ordered me to behave like I am some kind of rabid dog. More than once, more than twice. Constantly. Like I would ever do anything to put Mor and Emerieâs relationship into jeopardy. Donât worry, High Lord. Iâll behave. Iâll leave Mor and Elain alone. .â
Rhys ran a hand through his hair, his frustration clear. "This is not about Mor, Azriel. This is about keeping the peace within our Inner Circle. Elain has her own life and her own happiness to think about. Interfering could only bring pain, not just for you, but for everyone involved. Thatâs why I ordered you to keep your distance. Not because I donât trust your feelings or your actions, but because sometimes even the best intentions can have unintended consequences."
Azrielâs eyes darkened, his anger simmering just beneath the surface. "Don't give me any of your high and mighty bullshit, Rhysand. You donât think I am good enough for Mor, and you certainly don't think I am good enough for Elain. But donât worry, I'll keep my distance, as ordered. I wouldn't want to risk upsetting your perfect little court or ruining your plans for peace. Just tell me who else is off limits, so I know who else I'm not good enough for. Maybe Gwyn? Because remember, âdonât you dare to pressure herâ?"
Rhys sighed, his gaze softening slightly. "Azriel, it's not about who you're 'good enough' for and who you aren't. It's about respecting people's choices and boundaries. Elain has made her choice in Lucien, and I just want to protect her and the peace we've worked so hard to maintain. And no, nobody else is off limits. You're free toâŚ'seek your entertainment' as you please."
His entertainment.Â
Right.Â
Azriel snorted, the sound full of derision. âIt warms my heart that you give me that permission,â Azriel said, his voice dripping with disdain.
Rhys rolled his eyes, clearly irritated by Azriel's reaction. "I'm not trying to 'give you permission,' Azriel," he said firmly. "I'm just trying to make sure you understand why I'm asking you to behave. I care about you and our inner circle. You're my brother, but I also care about Elain and her happiness. I don't want to see anyone get hurt."
âHave I done anything, anything at all that put her happiness in jeopardy?â Azriel asked, his voices harsh. âI kept away as you ordered. I fucking saved Lucienâs life, so she could be happy.â
"You haven't done anything wrong," Rhys acknowledged, his tone softening. "You've been a better friend to Elain than anyone could have asked. You saved Luicen because you are a good person, not just for Elain's sake. But I still think itâs best if you keep your distance. Not just for her, but for yourself too. Dwelling on feelings that canât be returned will only bring you pain."
âFor cauldronâs sake, Rhys,â Cassian said with a sigh.
Rhys turned his attention to him, the exasperation clear in his eyes. "What, Cassian?" he asked, his tone weary.
Cassian rubbed a hand over his jaw, shaking his head. "Youâre so hell bent on keeping the peace you forget that the people in your court have feelings too," he said. "Azriel isnât some emotionless soldier doing your bidding. He has feelings and desires, just like everyone else. And sometimes itâs not as simple as just moving on."
"I know that," Rhys said, running a hand through his hair. "But sometimes we have to put our own feelings aside for the greater good. As a High Lord, I have to think about the impact my actions could have on others. I'm not trying to shut down Azriel's feelings. I'm just trying to protect him from potential pain.â
âYeah you did a shitty job at that,â Cassian said drily. âYou could have told Mor hundred of years ago to have a conversation with him. You didnât. But Azriel is supposed to tread carefully not to make her or Emerie uncomfortable. Azriel is supposed to behave?â
Rhys's eyes flashed in anger. "I know I've made mistakes, Cassian. I should have handled things differently with Mor and Azriel. But I can't change the past. All I can do is try to make the best decisions for everyone involved right now."
âYou donât even fucking realise how much of a self important hypocritical asshole you are, do you?â Azriel asked flatly. âItâs okay for you to pursue an engaged female thatâs engaged to another High Lord, damn the consequences. But the rest of usâŚwe are told to behave.â
Rhys bristled at Azrielâs words, his own temper threatening to flare. "That's different, Azriel," he said, his voice sharp. "Thatâs different and you know it. You would understand if you had aâŚâ he hesitated.
"If I had a what?" Azriel prompted sharply.
Rhys let out a frustrated sigh, his fingers clenching around his mug. "A mate."
âRhys,â Cassian said carefully.
"What?" Rhys snapped, his temper still simmering just below the surface. âHe doesnât have a mate, he doesnât fucking understand it.â
AaaaaandâŚ. Azriel was done.
So fucking done.Â
âWhere are you going?â Rhys demanded as he stood up.
âHome,â Azriel said flatly. âYou have my gifts, hand them out. Wish Feyre a Happy Birthday, will you? Iâll be back to do your bidding in about 3 days, High Lord.âÂ
âI highly doubt that your mother will enjoy your impromptu appearance at Rosehall,â Rhys said. Azrielâs hand twitched towards Truthteller. âLetâs justâŚâ
âRhysand!â Cassian snapped.
âWhat?â Rhys asked.Â
âI have talked to my mother once since the Sealing of Velaris was lifted,â Azriel said tightly. âOne conversation where she told me that she found a new family and that I should keep away from her. So no, Rhys. I am not going to Rosehall.â
Rhys looked utterly shell-shocked by Azrielâs revelation. "Azriel, I..." he started, but Azriel simply shook his head.
"Don't," he said. "Just don't." He didnât wnat to talk about it. He never wanted to talk about that. His mother could do whatever she wanted. he would leave her alone, just as requested. But he was not going to talk about it.Â
âThen I am coming with you. You are not spending Winter Solstice alone brooding at the House of Wind,â Cassian said quickly, standing.Â
âI am not going to the House of Wind either.â Azriel answered flatly. âI am going home to my house and I wonât be alone either.â
"What do you mean you won't be alone?" Rhys asked sharply.
Azriel just snorted, âMy mate will be there,â he said simply. âSheâs better company than any of you.â
âYour...your mate?â Rhys repeated, his eyes widening.
Cassian gaped at Azriel. "Your mate? Why didnât you tell us? Who is she?"
âWhy should I tell you? â Azriel gave back his voice icy. âI may trust you with this court, Rhysand, but I do not trust you with anything I love. Not anymore.â
423 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Alright so I appreciate the efforts to listen to Palestinian journalists and promote Palestinian campaigns, and I don't really like starting shit especially with people who are mostly on my side, but this is a terrible take. I'm a second generation Palestinian with family over there. Almost everyone in my family is extremely conservative when it comes to gender and ethnicities besides their own, but wanted Kamala Harris to win anyway (aside from a few of them who moved to the US and think queer people & mexicans are the biggest threat to their lives). Make no mistake, no one thinks she's their savior - they just know Trump will be worse.
This take also completely ignores the situation in Ukraine, and in the US domestically. Trump definitely won't be on Ukraine's side. Nothing more to say here really, just something important to mention.
Talking about how "better" and "worse" mean nothing to you because you've seen so many atrocities is honestly privileged. Sure, your privilege could take you to worse places - I'm glad you're recognizing that things are horrible, but this still lacks the level of personal investment necessary to see the difference between bad and worse. If 1,000 more people die for no reason, that might not be a huge amount relatively, but that's still 1,000 lives and every single one of them has meaning. None of them will say "oh, well, the other candidate in America would have also been capitalist, so it doesn't matter that I died! my death isn't THAT much of a difference." If you can't see that difference, you either can't see beyond black & white in general or have succumbed to doomerism on some level
Lastly, I think 1,000 is a low estimate. We could have protested if we got Kamala. We could have had more paths towards helping Palestinians. Trump is only worse. My family knows that. We don't know how many lives this election will cost, but it will be more than if he wasn't elected, and that deserves frustration and grief.
i've been feeling incredible anger and frustration lately with these posts lamenting what the next four years will look like in the u.s., how much "worse" things will get under the trump administration, as if we haven't been witnessing a holocaust for the past year funded by the biden administration. if you have seen a single video from gaza, a single picture, read a feature from a gazan journalist, spoken to a single person in your inbox when they plead for your attention and help, words like "worse" or "better" turn to ash in your mouth. just yesterday my friend hilda texted me that even when her family manages to get food, smoke from the fire needed to cook aggravates her sinus allergies, making it difficult to breathe. this is how she's been living for the past year and a month, under a democrat-funded genocide.
below is a small fraction of the palestinians who have reached out to me for help with their campaigns. it is a huge source of shame to me that i can't keep up with all of the people in my inbox. please go to their accounts and read their stories. and please give what you can spare.
hilda @hildanasr1 / GFM - 5%
dina @dina179 / GFM - 33%
yousseff @youseffamily / GFM - 92%
suad @suad-khaled / GFM - 51%
nada @nadamd44 / GFM - 1%
asma @asmaayyad2 / GFM - 62%
shehab family @reemshehabnew / GFM - 90%
yahya @yahyabkheet-blog / GFM - 21%
mohammed @mohammed-hassouna1 / GFM - 19%
abdulrahman @3bdulra7manosama / GFM - 9%
mai @abuhamdasblog / GFM - 5%
ibrahim @aburakhiaibrahim / GFM - 22%
mona @mansh99 / GFM - 13%
ahmed @najah-meshal5 / GFM - 16%
noor @noor-yashour / GFM - 10%
*ALL CAMPAIGNS ARE VETTED*
9K notes
¡
View notes
Text
Beta Reading and Fanfiction
Iâve been writing for a long time myself, but itâs only been very recently that Iâve immersed myself in communities online for it. Iâve been having so much fun really diving into Danny Phantom and DPxDC fanfic, and Iâve met so many great friends doing so.
I mostly do my own writing, but Iâve really enjoyed doing some beta reading as well, especially for friends! Thereâs something so fun about getting to dive into a work in progress and help where you can.
But I do feel like some people might really struggle to understand how to beta read, or what makes a good beta readerâ especially where fanfiction is concerned. Iâve been extremely fortunate to have wonderful beta readers, but Iâve had some friends frustrated with the beta reading theyâve in turn received, or otherwise feeling uncomfortable in asking for a beta reader since they donât know what to expect.
So, how should beta reading work? How do you do a good job?
Above all, the most important thing about beta reading is communication with your author. You are not in their WIP to prove how good of a writer you are, or to hammer their work into what you would personally be proud to present online. You are there to help, in whatever way the author has asked or communicated they're comfortable with.
Before you beta read anything it is vital to ask what the author is looking for in a beta reader. There are a number of things you can ask in particular, including:
What are you looking for help with?
Do you just want me to look for typos or confusing sentences?
Do you want suggestions for things to add?
Do you want suggestions on grammar, or other more in-depth writing suggestions?
Do you need help with characterization, or even the plot?
Depending on who you are beta reading for, you might have someone who only wants a very light beta touch. They might just want you to look for glaring mistakes, or for confirmation that a plot beat makes sense.Â
Other authors might want something much more involved! They might be trying to improve their grammar, or perhaps they're not very familiar with writing a new character and they would like suggestions for how to better capture their voice.
Regardless of what an author wants in a beta reader, you won't know unless you ask them! It's possible that you simply might not be compatible as beta reader and author, depending on their answer, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's okay to step back and say "I personally like to beta read things more in depth than this, so I might not be the best person to give it a look."
Otherwise, getting an answer about your author's preferences can help you figure out how to help them. Perhaps you would normally make more suggestions, but if an author has specified that they're not comfortable with that, then it's not your job as their beta reader to do so. If you are capable of sticking to the help they've asked for, then you will ultimately be fulfilling your role as their beta reader admirably.
"But I'm just trying to help. Their work has a lot of places it could improve!"
Again, beta reading is not about shaping a story into something you would personally present as your writing. It is about helping the author produce a story they're comfortable with and proud of.
It's not about being right, or heavily criticizing their writing and grammar abilities (unless this is what the author has explicitly requested!)
Especially while writing fanfiction, the work presented is not something that will ever see publishing, or that needs to have flawless grammar and syntax. This is work done for free, and it is done for fun.
And that's something very vital to beta readingâ
A beta reader needs to preserve the fun.
It's very daunting, putting your work out there for others. It's especially daunting putting your work up for analysis of any kind. You're accepting that people might not understand your vision, or may judge you for what you've written.
It's all too easy to compare yourself to other creatives online, and to overthink and overanalyze your talents. Too often, itâs easy to get discouraged and feel like your work isnât good enough.
Beta reading should never be done in a way that will discourage writing. Even if an author has asked for a lot of help, itâs important to pick your battles with what you choose to analyze, and to check in with them if you feel like you might be crossing boundaries or covering their work in too much metaphorical red ink.
When people are trying to improve their writing, you donât always have to mark every little suggestion you think of. Unless the author is a friend you know well, or has explicitly asked for Extreme measures of help, it might be best to ignore some smaller writing issues and focus instead on bigger things.Â
If youâve already marked a lot of issues in one paragraph, but have more things you could say, consider if the additional suggestions are vital or if it might be better to leave them be. After all, if your author is looking to improve, and if you are planning to beta read for them again in the future, then helping them with more glaring issues now will help them in a way that is not overwhelming, and will open the door for other kinds of suggestions to be better understood and absorbed.Â
You can always check in with your author if youâre unsure, too. Ask them if they appreciate the amount of suggestions youâve given them, or if itâs been too much. Your author might be uncomfortable with telling you that theyâre overwhelmed, and checking in is a good way to ensure that youâre both on the same page.
All that being said, though, it is also important to not always focus on things to fix and improve. Youâre not just editing the story, youâre reading it. Part of keeping beta reading fun is engaging in that story as any reader would. It both helps morale, and helps let the author know what theyâre doing right, when you take the time to tell them what you enjoy about the work youâre beta reading!
There are so many ways you can express positive things about an authorâs writing. Consider:
âI love how you phrased this sentence here.â
âThis body language feels natural and very in character!â
âI love this word choice here.â
âThis part was really funny and had me laughing.â
âIâm excited to see where this goes!â
Youâre reading a story, and you must have thoughts and feelings on it outside of suggestions. Let your author know! People thrive on positive feedback, and thereâs just as much to be gained in marking Positive attributes to a story as there is in noting places to improve.
The last major thing I feel is vital to beta reading is respecting that it is your authorâs work, and that your suggestions (however clever or helpful you feel they are) may be rejected. And that that is okay.Â
Suggestions are just thatâ suggestions.
What you might like in creative writing might not necessarily be what your author wants to express. You might love to use ellipses, or lots of different dialogue tags, while your author might prefer dashes and more standard dialogue tags. You might like to use more colorful descriptions of scenery and atmosphere, while your author might want to focus much more on the character body language and dialogue. You might like to use a lot of exclamation points and next to no italics, while your author might like a lot of italics and very little exclamation points.Â
Youâre ultimately two different people, with two different ideas of what is an ideal way to tell a story. And while you can give many different suggestions on just about anything the author might add, remove, or change, itâs ultimately the authorâs choice whether or not they accept those changes.
Itâs not your job as a beta reader to double down and insist that they accept a specific suggestion. Itâs not your job to make a case for why you think they need to change something. If an author has denied a suggestionâ itâs best to let it go. Especially if you donât know them well, and donât have a very good rapport with them, pushing the issue will only serve to make you both uncomfortable.
Itâs not just about picking your battles, but also about mutual respect. Youâre not a teacher, nor an editor looking to make their work prime for publishing. You have to respect their decisions for their own story, even if that means they decide not to take a suggestion you felt would be impactful.Â
Itâs also always important to keep in mind that writing style, particularly where creative writing is concerned, can vary wildly. The strict rules that you learn in school were made to be broken. You learn them to figure out how to break them and, particularly when writing for fun, it doesnât even matter if youâre breaking those rules in a perfect way. Itâs fanfiction. Itâs freeform, itâs fun. If someone wants to make a habit out of going buckwild with their writing style, thereâs really no reason to try and corral their writing into a box labeled âHigh School English 101â.Â
You canât force someone to write their fanfiction like itâs going to go to a letter grade, nor should you try to unless theyâre looking for that level of editing.Â
Be willing to listen, and pay attention to what is and isnât working. Itâs good to take note of suggestions that your author has already commented on. Have they thanked you for pointing out something in particular? Have they expressed they feel weak with something in their writing?
Is there a type of suggestion that you keep making that they have rejected multiple times?
Work with their strengths and with their style. Focus on suggestions that have been received well, and consider letting go of ones that the author clearly has no interest in, or that might conflict with their style.
Communicate and respect each other, above all else.
Beta reading is such a helpful and wonderful thing someone can do for an author. Iâve been so thankful to have it done for my own work, and I try my best to be helpful and considerate when Iâve beta read myself.Â
Having my work beta read has really helped me find things to improve upon in my writing, and has helped me feel more confident in the stories Iâve posted, just having another eye look over them before they hit the internet. I donât always take all of their suggestions, and might disagree from time to time with the direction they want something to go in, but Iâve been thankful to have understanding, kind betas that work with me well.Â
And thatâs one more point I want to touch on too, is that I hope that, as a beta reader, you find yourself with authors that show you mutual respect in turn. That they thank you for the work youâve put in to help them succeed, and have made the experience positive for you as well.
It always makes me happy to see beta readers credited on posted works. Itâs a kind thing for writers to show appreciation, and to acknowledge that someone helped shape the words you see on the page.Â
This got much longer than I intended it to, but I just hope that this post might help some people in some way. Either to understand beta reading and the purpose of it, or how to potentially go about it themselves.Â
I really recommend giving beta reading a try if youâre comfortable with it, especially if you have friends that write fanfiction! Even just an extra pair of eyes looking for typos can be a godsend for someone who has spent hours upon hours staring at a long fic and editing it.
264 notes
¡
View notes
Text
ŕŞââ´ bitter truths|| dealer!matt x doll!reader
sturniolo masterlist add yourself to the taglist
she was laughing, leaning against her desk as she chatted with noah, a guy from her college. her eyes sparkled as she giggled at something he said, her entire posture relaxed and comfortable in his presence. but matt, standing by the door, could feel something dark twisting in his chest as he watched them. he didnât get jealousâbut heâd seen noah around. he knew the guy. he wasnât some harmless friend and he surely didnât have the best intentions. and watching her so openly enjoying his company made mattâs jaw clench.
he cleared his throat loudly, catching her attention. she glanced over, her big smile faltering as she noticed the coldness in his eyes.
âoh! matt,â she said, pulling herself away from noah. âthis is noah, from my psych class. heâs been helping me with some notes.â
noah nodded politely, but matt didnât return the gesture, his arms crossed tightly, eyes narrowing. âright. helping,â he repeated, voice dripping with sarcasm. her expression softened, her brow creasing slightly as she sensed his tension.
âcan we talk?â he said, his tone stiff. âalone.â he added, bitterly eyeing noah.
she looked at noah apologetically. she barely had a chance to say goodbye before matt grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out of the room. she could feel the anger radiating off him, heavy, simmering, the kind that made her stomach twist.
she shifted under his gaze, trying to hold her ground, but his intensity made her stomach twist.
âwhat the hell are you doing, doll?â his voice was cold, almost a snarl. âhanging around with a guy like him?â
she frowned, taken aback by his tone. âheâs just a friend, matt. heâs helping me with some notesââ
âa friend? you donât get it, do you?â his voice was mocking, filled with a bitterness she hadnât heard from him before. âpeople like him donât want to be friends with someone like you. youâre just easy prey.â
her eyes widened, a hurt expression flashing across her face. âmatt, why are you being soââ
ârealistic?â he interrupted, eyes narrowing. âbecause someone has to be. you think everyoneâs got some good in them, that everyoneâs gonna treat you the way you treat them. but thatâs not how the world works, doll. youâre too blind to see it.â
her lip trembled, but she took a shaky breath, trying to stay calm. âyouâre wrong, matt. i know what heâs like with me. just because he doesnât fit into your world doesnât meanââ
âoh, please,â he cut in, rolling his eyes. âyou really think you know what youâre doing? you donât have a clue. youâre just letting him string you along because heâs nice to you. thatâs all it takes, isnât it?â his words were sharp, condescending. âanyone gives you a bit of attention, and youâre ready to trust them with anything.â
her face flushed, her chest tightening at his words. âi thought⌠i thought you trusted me, matt. trusted that i could figure things out.â
âtrusted you?â he scoffed, shaking his head in frustration. ây/n, iâm just trying to keep you from getting hurt. but youâre too stubborn, too naive to see that half these people only see you as an easy target.â
the word naive cut through her like a knife, each syllable laced with disdain. âso thatâs what you think of me?â her voice was barely above a whisper. âsome⌠some helpless girl who canât take care of herself?â
âisnât that exactly what youâre proving right now?â he snapped, his patience finally snapping with it. âyouâre so desperate for everyone to like you, so willing to see the good in people, that you donât even realize theyâre laughing behind your back. they see you as this silly soft girl they can use and toss aside.â his voice was harsh, each word landing like a blow.
tears pricked at her eyes, but she held them back, swallowing hard. âi⌠i thought you saw me differently.â
he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. âdoll, youâre⌠youâre sweet, alright? youâre too sweet for your own good. âtâs gonna ruin you if you donât learn to see through people like him. and right now, youâre just proving me right. youâre proving you donât get how people are.â
she flinched, his words making her chest ache. âmaybe⌠maybe i donât want to see people the way you do, matt. maybe i want to believe in people. i thought youâd get that.â
âget that?â he scoffed, crossing his arms. ââm done trying to understand why youâre so determined to get hurt. you donât get it, do you? youâre weak and you refuse to see it. you refuse to admit that you need someone to watch out for you.â
the words echoed in her mind, his voice searing into her heart. weak. naive. silly. and what hurt her the most was how he addressed her by her name and not as doll. she felt a tear slip down her cheek and quickly wiped it away, but matt didnât soften, didnât reach out to her.
for a moment, she couldnât even speak, her throat tight with unshed tears. âif thatâs really how you see me, then⌠maybe you donât know me at all.â her voice was shaky, laced with hurt she couldnât hide.
he watched her, his expression unreadable, but he didnât move. he didnât apologize or reach out to stop her as she turned and walked away, each step heavier than the last. she kept her gaze down, trying to block out his words, but they echoed in her mind, relentless.
days passed. she avoided his texts, his calls, even ignored the harsh banging on her door and every attempt he made to reach her. every time she saw his name flash on her phone, her chest tightened and the hurt bubbled up again. she knew matt was protective, that he cared, but his words had felt like a betrayal, like he didnât trust her to know what was best for herself.
an; angst bc i'm sad(â ・â â˘Ěâ ︿â â˘Ěâ ・â ) also tell me do we like this small title font more or the quote font one?
taglist; @mattsdolll @izzylovesmatt
#cherrynflowergardenđŚ˘đšđ#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo fluff#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo angst#matt sturniolo au#matt sturniolo imagine#matt stuniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo x yn#dealer!matt#doll!reader#chris sturniolo angst#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo x you#nick sturniolo x reader#angst
294 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Okay. I always look at these posts and see these comments,
Americangirl: Yes, women make up alot of Trumps voterbase, most of them are republican and considering how he did in the polls, will stay republican, however, this does not make the idea of âvoting against your ownâ less true, as many other demographics have done the same over the promises of other issues that have been mentioned, but regardless, the threat is there, to a-lot of people it felt like that if you vote for trump there will be a long trickle effect leading to the infringement of their rights, something that they are entitled to in a country that flaunts it. So yes, people are threatened, want more information? You can probably check, im not here to teach you.
I can see your point, I know people that work their asses off daily only to lose more than a quarter of their check. This job market is shit. Yet it is that frustration that galvanizes this frustrated demographic, they feel that whatever the republicans will do will lead to less taxes, regardless of action, meaning less welfare, which in turn, affects poor people. What we really need is to stop believing that republicans are low taxes and dems are high, it is not productive, we need to hold our governments accountable for spending money on a broken system without even taking the time to fix it, and focus those tax dollars into efficiency, which, if Iâm being honest, is not being done as much as one or the other side of this bipartisan shitscape likes to imagine they are.
This is just not even productive. âThe left hates the poorâ very good observation. I get the feeling that you use your âvibesâ on alot of things but please do understand that the butt of most jokes is that we spend (politically) TOO MUCH time and money on the poor to the point its controversial. Remember obamacare?
To sum it up, I have a headache, and my words will go out from one ear to the other. I am left because I chose to be, I read, I studied, and I saw what it stood for. I did not go off âvibesâ, and from what it stands now, yes, I will stay left until the right stops abusing their ability to funnel american frustration into their own needs and wants, until they stop using their idea on how its âtheyâ that is causing all the problems, rather than the men in suits that live within us, perpetuating this broken system that is abused. Until they start talking sense, instead of using words like âwoke mind virusâ âbrainwashedâ and other buzzwords to further perpetuate this antagonism of âtheyâ whoever âtheyâ are.
TLDR: these comments piss me the fuck off, and I had to point some shit out, if you choose to ignore it, fine, so be it. Donât be surprised when your echo chamber gets too loud or unfriendly.
24K notes
¡
View notes
Text
Side Effects (NSFW)
Guys Iâm so sorry I know I disappeared forever ago but I am back! I updated my page, and I look forward to writing for all you lovely people again! Iâm back on my same old shit (absolutely vile dom!reader smut) so I hope youâre ready >:) This one's a little softer because I think Nanami deserves a bit of a soft!dom...I hope you enjoy! Feeling a little rusty so sorry if this isn't my best work :/
Summary: Your boyfriend has been on edge recently - most likely due to a rapid increase in curses over the last few weeks - so when you get a call from Shoko, you assume the worst. Lucky for you both, heâs not dead. However, she informs you that heâs experiencing some strange side effects, so you find yourself rushing to Jujutsu Tech to deal with a rather unfortunate⌠problem.
Warnings: swearing, smut, dom!reader, reader has a vagina, p in said v, subby!nanami, sex pollen/sex curse, semi-breeding kink, nanami gets his shit rocked, begging, overstimulation (reader and nanami receiving), unsafe sex (wrap your wee-wee please), a bit praise, nanami calls reader wife once
Let me know if you think I missed anything!!
All characters are over 18 :)
â â âÂ
Bzzt, Bzzt!
You groan, eyes tearing away from the screen in front of you. Life had been in a bit of a slog recently - with your boyfriend constantly away on missions and you trapped at your boring desk job, a phone call was a welcome reprieve. What was odd was the fact that your phone was ringing at all - the only calls that can get through when your phone is silenced is your parents, Nanami, and -
Shoko.
Bright letters flash at the top of your screen as you scramble away in a hurry, phone in hand. You mumble some half-assed excuse as you fly out the doors of the office, keys already in hand, and shakily answer the call.
âShoko? Is everything okay?â you force out, nearly slipping as you speed-walk to the car. âIs he okay?â
âItâs Nanami,â she says, panic evident in her voice. âHe came back from a mission today, wonât stop asking for you. I canât quite get a read on what he got hit with yet, and Iâve never seen him like this, is there any chance you-â
âIâm already in the car, Iâm on my way,â you confirm. âHeâs okay, though? No obvious signs of injury?â
âNothing physical, no,â she says, and you let out a breath you didnât know youâd been holding. âBut somethingâs still clearly wrong, and having you here might help me analyse it. Clearly heâs been hit by some effect of the curse, Iâve never seen this man frantic like this in my life.â
âIâll be there soon as I can. Call me if you have any updates.â
Shoko hums a confirmation and hangs up, leaving you alone with your thoughts. Your grip on the steering wheel tightens, and you take in a shaky breath. What could possibly be wrong? Why did your boyfriend need you, right this instant? At the very least, Shoko didnât seem to think it was life threatening, but what relief was that? Being a sorcerer was dangerous, hell, that was why you and Nanami had quit in the first place, but you always knew he couldnât avoid the call of it for long. You prayed that whatever this was would be out of his system in no time.
You take the turn into Jujutsu Tech far faster than you should, haphazardly parking your car. You think you hear the beep! of your car locking, but all you can really hear in your head is the pounding of your heart. Weaving across the grounds, you rush to Shokoâs office, almost barreling into her when you throw the door open.
âWhere is he? Is he okay? You didnât call me again so I assume itâs fine, but-â
âHey, breath,â she says, oddly calm considering her call earlier. âI figured out the issue.â
âYou did?â you exclaim, a little frustrated she didnât call you. It must not be serious if she didnât call, but still! She couldâve at least sent a textâŚ
She wiggles her eyebrows at you, a smirk growing on her face. âYou guys have to bang.â
âWhat??â you flush, throwing your arms up. âS-shoko, this isnât the time for jokes-â
âNot a joke,â she says with a grin, making crude gestures with her hand. âYou guys have to bang it out of his system. Fuck. Two-man tango. âMake loveâ, or whatever. Not the worst curse to get hit by, huh?â
âYou had me all worried for nothing!â you groaned, dragging a hand down your face. âI thought he was injured, or worse, dying! I could be at work right now, I didnât even clock out! God, Iâm going to be in so much shit when I get back.â
âNo.â
âNo?â
âNo. He needs your help,â she explains with a sigh. âThe gas that the curse released from its body works as an aphrodisiac, a deadly one. If he doesnât, uhmâŚâmateâ any time soon it could be lethal.â
You flush deeper, blinking at her owlishly. You waited, hoping she was joking, but she was clearly dead serious. âWhere is he?â
âHeâs got his own room, all the way down on the left,â she sighed, rubbing her temples. âDonât ruin my equipment, you hear me?â
You salute, grinning at her, âAye aye, captain!â
She rolls her eyes, watching you go. Itâs going to be a long shift, she thought, rubbing her temples once again. They donât pay me nearly enough for this.
You make your way down the hall, fluorescent lights flickering above your head. It smelled like chemicals and death down her, a terrible combo. You wrinkle your nose. How does Shoko put up with this all day, every day?
Lost in your thoughts, you donât even realise that youâre at the end of the hall until you hear it. Frantic, almost manic, heavy breathing from the door on your left. You gulp, rubbing your thighs together. Fuck, in all your time with your boyfriend, youâve never heard him this desperate before. Like the world was going to end if he didnât get his dick wet. Lord, you havenât even seen him yet, and youâre already soaking through your underwear, you can feel it. Tugging on the hem of your sleeve, you nervously raise a hand to knock on the door.
âKentoâŚ?â you startle at the sound he lets out at the sound of your voice. It sounded likeâŚa whine?
âDarling, ooh, darling,â he groans, pitchier than youâve ever heard him. âYou shouldnât be here, love, get out of here.â
âKen, honey, I canât just leave you like this-â
âPlease, before I do something I regret, you have to go- hngh!â
Thereâs a wet splatter on the other side of the door, so quiet you almost didnât hear it. You freeze momentarily, not wanting to believe it.
âKen, did you justâŚ?â
âFuck, darling, you donât know what you do to me,â he groans out. You can hear it now - how heâs rutting into his hand on the other side of the door. The wet shlick of dick sliding in his hand, the way he didnât stop, even after he came. And heâs certainly never swore this early on, before heâs had your hands on you.
âYou donât know what you do to me,â you say, fingers finding the buttons of your shirt frantically. You donât care that youâre in the hallway, you donât care that Shokoâs just down the hall - thereâs nothing in your head but the needy sounds of your boyfriend on the other side of the door.
âPlease, you have to leave-â
âOpen the door, honey,â you say, voice syrupy and sweet. âWant you to fill me up so good, can you do that? For me?â
You hear a quiet âFuck!â from behind the door and the door handle rattles as he struggles to open it in his haze. At this point, youâre dripping, and you reach a hand out to help him. Easing the door open, you can feel the heat coming off of Nanami in waves. Thereâs a heady scent of pure sex in the air, and you donât get a chance to take him in before heâs closing the door and trapping you against it.
âYou shouldnât be here, love,â he murmurs against your neck, hot breath tickling your ear. âPlease, go before I lose control.â
Without hesitating, you pull him back by the hair and smash your lips to his. Heâs motionless against you, for a moment, before his lips slot against you frantically. His hands come to grope your sides, mean and careless with his touch. He slots his legs between yours almost absentmindedly, and his hips begin to cant against you.
You separate, panting. âSo desperate youâre already humping my leg like a slut?â
He flushes, slowing his hips down. You could feel his cock twitch against you, and you grin up at his dishevelled state. Heâs a wreck - his tie pulled loose from his neck, the first few buttons of his shirt undone, his pants not even off, just hanging loosely around his ankles - and youâre grateful, for a moment, for the curse that hit him.Â
âS-sorry, love,â he breathes, barely more than a whisper. âCanât control it, please, need you, need you so bad- mngh, fuck!â
You grin, lazily palming his angry cock. âOh, honey, Iâll help you out. Think you can get on the bed for me?â
He nods, whining softly when he pulls away from your hand. He stumbles over to the bed, losing his pants along the way. He sits and looks at you expectantly, flushed all the way down his neck. His hands are shaking from how much heâs holding back, and he bites his lip so hard it bleeds as you walk over, stripping as you approach. Ever the gentleman, he doesnât reach out and touch, though itâs clear that he wants to. But right now, youâre in control, and even with the heat coursing through his veins, he lets you take what you want from him.
âOh, sweetheart,â you say, voice thick with need. âGonna let me ride your cock? Let you fill me up, breed me?â
âGod, darling,â he says with a groan, a bead of precum running down his angry cock. âWant to fill your pussy up, put my kids in you, make you nice and round- mmph!â
You slam your lips to his, guiding him to lay back on the bed. You throw your legs on either side of his and grind down hard, smiling against his lips at the way his hips twitch up against yours. You reach back, fumbling to grip his cock and guide it to your waiting hole. Youâre soaking, and thereâs a wet shlick as sink down to the base of his cock.
âShit, fuck, sorry, honey-â His hands find the plush of your hips, and he holds you down as he cums, hot and warm inside you. Your surprised laugh quickly morphs into a moan as you feel him fill you. Itâs neverending - youâre certain heâs never come this much in one go before - and you quickly regain your senses, grinding your hips in slow circles, riding him through his orgasm. His eyes are squeezed shut, and his back is arched as he twitches, but he never softens inside you.
âAlready came again?â you mock, looking down at him condescendingly as he blinks back into reality. âSome curse you got hit with, must feel so good to let go, huh, baby?â
âC-couldnât help it, fuck!â he stammers out, hips bucking into your slow grinding. âNeed it, need to cum again, need to feel you cum around me as I fuck you full, please, darling, can I?â
His eyes flick up to yours, desperation evident in his gaze. Your boyfriend, who rarely swears during sex, begging you to cum? You were certainly in no place to say no!
Without warning, you pick up the roll of your hips, holding his hips down so he canât buck into you. He moans, flush spreading all the way down his chest. His thighs are flexing below yours, aching to buck up into you, but you wonât let him.
âIf you want my help, you let me control the pace,â you bluff, trying your best to keep your head with how his tip is brushing against your sweet spot oh so sweetly. âKeep trying to buck up and Iâll leave you here to take care of your little predicament yourself.â
âNo!â he pants out, frenzied. âNo, please, darling, donât go, Iâll do anything, Iâll be good for you, please-â
âYeah?â you say, grin feral as you pick up your pace even more. Youâre barely able to get words out anymore, but heâs certainly not faring any better. âG-Gonna be good for me? Gonna- hngh, fuck! - fill up my pretty pussy, give me your- ahn- give me your babies?â
He nods, hand fumbling to rub at your clit. His fingers are mean, out of control, but the rough feel of his fingers against your clit is delicious nonetheless. Your head falls forward, and your hips get frantic, pace inconsistent as heat coils in your belly.Â
âClose, âm getting close-â you moan out. âNeed you to cum with me, make me full, can you do that for me?â
âMhmm, anything for you, love,â he says, eyes fluttering shut as he loses himself to the feeling of your gummy walls around him. âLove you, love you so much, please, canât hold on much longer, need to cum- oogh, fuck!â
With a soft ahn, ahn, ahn, youâre cumming around him, grinding your clit down into his hands as he cums, shooting his seed deep into you. You canât help but keep grinding down, dragging your orgasm out as long as possible. You shakily drag your hips to a stop, head falling forward to knock with his. You let out a soft breathy laugh as you swoop down to kiss him again, his cock finally starting to flag inside you. As you move to get up, he grabs your waist, wincing as he holds you on his cock.
âSorry honey, âm still sensitive,â he whimpers, twitching out a few more spurts of gooey cum into you. âCan- can you sit here, for a little longer?â
âOf course, Ken,â you say, smile soft as you place a kiss against his temple. âWhatever you need. Are you feeling better?â
âA little sore, for sure,â he notes, eyes roaming up your body. âThough youâre probably hurting too, is there anything I can do for you?â
You bark out a laugh, shaking your head. Really is such a gentleman, you think as you struggle to control your face. After all that, heâs worried about me?
âIâm okay, Ken, I wasnât the one hit with a curse, after all,â you note, hands absentmindedly running up his sides. He smiles up at you, eyes heavy with exhaustion, and pulls you down into him.
âHey, we need to clean up-â
âJust a second, darling,â he says, yawning as he speaks. âJust need a second to hold you, thatâs all.â
You melt against him, knowing that you werenât going anywhere any time soon. As his breath steadies and he drifts under you, you trace circles on his chest, letting your heavy eyes fall closed, too. Heâs right, just a secondâŚ
â â âÂ
You wake up with a jolt to a banging on the door, a chorus of voices on the other side.
âNanamin, I heard you got hit by a curse, are you okay??â
âBe quiet, Itadori, heâs probably trying to rest.â
âShut up, Fushiguro, you donât know that-â
âWill both of you shut up?? Either way, heâs definitely awake from all the racket youâre causing-â
You groan, tuning them out as you rub the sleep from your eyes. You glance up at your boyfriend, disagreeing with Nobara - Nanami was still asleep, a little bit of drool coming out of his open mouth. You cringe as you sit up, every muscle in your body burning in protest as you disentangle yourself from Nanami. You wince as you slide off his cock, his release trickling down your leg as you make an attempt to gather dress yourself. Nanami finally stirs awake, groaning softly as his bleary eyes peel open. His eyes find yours as your fumble through the clothes on the floor, throwing his pants to him. He rubs his eyes and rolls to sit on the edge of the bed, watching you intently.
âWe need to get dressed,â you say, voice scratchy with sleep. âThe kids want to see you.â
âMm, they canât wait a little longer? I want some alone time with my wife now that Iâm feeling better.â
âYour wife?â you say, grinning at him. âI know I gave you a good time, but you gotta put a ring on it first, mister.â
He laughs, pulling you against him and burying his head into your stomach. Your fingers come up to play with his hair, and he breathes you in, for a second.
Soon, he thinks. Soon Iâll put a ring on that finger.
Word Count: 2675
#jjk smut#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x you#dom!reader#sub character#sub!nanami#sub nanami#dom reader#daisy writes<3#nanami x reader#nanami smut#nanami kento smut#ugh the things I would do to this man!!#jujustsu kaisen smut#jujustu kaisen x reader#nanami kento the man you are...
221 notes
¡
View notes
Text
I'm not going to call myself a feminist man or anything like that. But I do try to stand up to other men in daily life when they say or do something sexist against women. I try to convince them that women are human beings like them with similar issues and struggles and not some insidious foreign species that is strong and weak at the same time that should be "returned" to their rightful place.
The problem? They don't respect me and thus won't listen to me. I mean, why would they listen to a man in his thirties who has last had a relationship years ago and it was his only one which didn't start until his late twenties, who has a low-paying job, can't afford to move out and in general has slim prospects to secure what those men respect the most - successful relationships with women? Like, I don't have the credentials that would make those men listen to me, and they'll point to my "feminist" beliefs and say that's the reason.
Men that aren't close to me who act like that? To them I'm just a "pedal" (read: fag) and they see me as some kind of traitor to men or a silly bleeding heart and they'd rather listen to a woman than to me. Or usually I don't engage with them at all unless I have to talk to them.
With friends, I do call them out, I say stuff like "bro that's a fucked up things to say", "don't generalize", we have discussions at length, but because of my shall we say limited experience with women, they dismiss me as naive and idealistic, at best. They know women better, they've had experience and that, you see, justifies them being sexist. I'll grow up, they almost say, I'll see.
The only people I "get to" give a piece of advice to and have spoken to are incels-to-be because I've been in their place and not turned out an incel (I spent most of my 20s without any female attention with all the feelings of rejection and frustration that entailed).
So yeah, I'm doing what I can. I know it's not enough. But I don't know what to do anymore that's not counterproductive.
Men need other men who have faced the same issues and made the right decisions and come out on top. As in, lead a life they're content with and are feeling confident regardless of, or maybe thanks to, "feminist" choices they've made, because to many men those choices seem mutually exclusive with "true" masculinity that will leave them feeling comfortable in their own skin.
If your vision for the deradicalization of right-wing men begins and ends with "other men telling them that that's gross and to stop it" then I'm sorry, you do not understand how masculinity works.
"Men who hold patriarchal status" and "men who are feminists" are two groups who overlap less than you want them to. I'm sorry. That's not solely because men are so happy with patriarchal status that they don't want to risk it by policing misogyny/queerphobia/racism, It's because being misogynistic, queerphobic, and racist, end expressing other forms of toxic masculinity(and often abusively so) are part of how people establish and maintain patriarchal status. The men who have the ability to stop this via nothing but peer pressure are the very people who are doing it. That's by design. And engaging in feminist intervention is, in and of itself, usually the abrupt end of that status and its associated power to persuade misogynistic men.
Like, I have worked in blue collar jobs as a notably queer person. It was pretty much a constant deluge of verbal abuse. In my experience, most blue collar work environments are exploitative, abusive, and bigoted, and very gleefully so. On the occasions I have spoken up about someone saying something that was super fucking out of line (asking me which of the girls walking by was hottest. We were installing a portable classroom at a middle school), believe it or not, they completely failed to be shamed! Because nobody else on the crew gave a fuck. *I* was the weird one. They ghosted me. A full blown company ghosted me. I suddenly didn't have a job anymore because they just straightforwardly stopped telling me where the next job site was.
Like, this doesn't mean that it's your job to do it, but this vision you have of these big groups of men where everyone is on the fence and there is precisely one shit stirrer who can be shut down by a brave feminist man who can single handedly set the example for all these other guys...you are high. You are describing an "everybody clapped" level absurd scenario. Most of these truly virulent misogynistic guys either have zero friends, because, you know, our society is atomized to fuck, or they are in a group where the feminist guy is actually the weirdo who can be shut down and ostracized much, much easier than the misogynists, because there is no such thing as a man misogynists respect who stands up for women.
You might be saying "well, we're talking about longstanding personal relationships, actually. Like, they need to have to want to spend time with you and then, as a side effect, you can mind control them out of being a threat to us."
Problem with that being:
1: Many feminist men also have no friends, see the atomized society above.
2: Feminist men already stopped hanging out with men who make rape jokes because why the fuck would we want to spend time with them.
3: That isn't just because we respect women so hard. We are in many cases talking about men who are also deeply queerphobic, heirarchical, violent and abusive to other men. What initially drew me to feminism and women was a lack of heirarchical squabbling and constant bullying, and the ability to be openly queer. A lot of men who came to feminism did so because they knew that the patriarchy was not a place they would find success or acceptance. These are not the men who are gonna be able to change right wing minds.
4. Men do not view themselves as a monolith. There is no universal brotherhood of men. The actual meaning of the term "Fragile masculinity" is that men are constantly expected to prove that they are deserving of the status of being a member of their own gender. There are large swathes of men--including most of the men who you'd look to as examples of good, feminist men who you want to undertake this project--who are considered failed men, sissies, f****ts, soyboys, ect. They are. Not. Going. To. Convince. These. Men. Of. Jack. Shit. Much less successfully *shame* them. Jesus.
I know all of this sucks. I know it would be cool to be able to just point at a group and have them be responsible for the work. But nah. It's gonna have to be a societal project, one that will probably outlast all of us. Sorry. The thing you want these men to do is, absolutely, the morally correct thing to do. But presuming that it would be effective is, and once again I am so sorry about this, just ignorance of how these social groups function.
5K notes
¡
View notes
Text
Do You Wanna Touch Me?
18+ ONLY
Summary: Part Two to Hotblooded, Reader can't help herself. She needs Dean anyway she can get him.
Warnings: Smut, Masturbation, Spice, Dirty Talk
Pairing: Dean Winchester x reader
A/N: wow. I did not expect that last one to get so much love and attention! Thank you all for being so kind! This is only my second ? time writing smut, so I hope it meets your expectations. I may keep this one going for at least one more part if you guys are interested. :) As always, comments, reblogs, and likes are always appreciated!
do not copy and share my work anywhere, you don't have permission.
I had been trying to fall asleep for hours now, and yet here I lay, half naked and clinging to a pillow for dear life. The ingredients in my drink from earlier were still running their course through my system and had left me panting at the mere thought of Dean. Iâd rid myself of my T-shirt before Sam had even left my room, heat emanating from my body at a rapid pace. Sam had awkwardly averted his gaze before locking me in and reminding me that I should feel better after I rest. And yet even hours later, I feel like Iâll die if I donât see Dean soon, speak to him, touch himâŚ
               I groan as I shift to snag my phone from the nightstand, my hips rolling deliciously against the pillow below me. Feral thoughts of the hunter a few doors down rack my brain and I quickly pull up his contact before pressing the call button. His ringtone echoes down the hall from where I assume he is in the library before he answers.
               âHey, Darlinâ,â His voice alone causes my heart to race, a gasp leaving my lips, âAre you okay?â
               I shuffle to straddle the pillow below me as he speaks, the worry for me in his voice sending me into a frenzy, âNo. I need you.â I practically cry into the speaker, âNeed you so bad.â
               He sighs deeply and I can hear papers shuffling in the background, âYou should be asleep, Sweetheart.â
               âCanât sleep.â I mumble, rolling my hips against the pillow as he speaks, âCan only think about you. I donât think Iâll think of anything else ever again.â
               âIâm trying to find something to help make it easier for you, Iâm sorry.â He whispers, papers shuffling again, âI promise, itâs got to wear off eventually.â
               I let out a frustrated sound, my bottom lip jutting out as I whine, âIâm going to die in here! Iâm going to die from needing you so bad and you wont even come in here to help me.â
               âI canât come help you, Baby. Itâs not you thatâs asking for this.â He whispers and I can hear the frustration in his voice. One part of me is yelling for me to shut up, to hang up the phone and go to bed, try to somehow go to sleep and forget this ever happenedâŚbut the other part of me is ravenous, feral for the man on the other end of the line, and she is not going to lose this battle without a fight.
               âItâs your job to help people, Dean.â I cry out, a low blow I know, but the desperation coursing through my veins wonât let up, âAre you really going to leave me here like this?â
               âDonât do that.â He growls out, âI told you before that we could talk about this when youâre not drunk off some god-level fuck juice. I want to talk about this. I do want to help you, but I wonât go in that room.â
               His take-no-shit tone goes straight to my core, which I know is the exact opposite of what heâs looking for, but I canât stop imagining the firm look on his face as he scolds me. My hips roll quicker, a ravenous feeling overtaking my thoughts, âPlease keep talking.â I whisper as my eyes close. I hear his breathing hitch, but he doesnât speak for a moment, and I bite my lip nervously. Did I make him upset? I donât think I can live with myself if heâs upset with me, âIâm sorry, I didnât-.â
               âDonât apologize.â He cuts me off quickly, âWhat are you doing?â
               Embarrassment should flood my system, but the idea of being caught getting off to his voice just spurs me on. I lift off the pillow to roll my shorts down my legs and then position myself over it again, âWhat do you think Iâm doing?â I whisper seductively into the speaker. Hoping, practically praying, that he knows and heâll throw whatever righteousness he has left out the window to come help me reach my goal. Sweat pours down my forehead and a heaviness sits in my hips, I rut against the pillow again to try and alleviate the feeling, a small moan leaving my lips as I do.
               The rough sound of his chair sliding across the library floor and his heavy boots thudding as he walks stills me. I sit with bated breath listening to the sound through the phone, waiting to hear him outside my door, âWhere are you going?â
               I hear him chuckle quietly before his voice finally graces my ear again, âWhere do you think Iâm going?â I hear his boots come to a stop, but no sound comes from the hallway in front of my room.
               I groan in frustration, rutting against the pillow isnât bringing the amount of relief that my body needs and the thought of Dean not being here to help me brings a sinking feeling in my stomach, âWhere are you?â
               A door clicks closed on his end before he speaks, âWhat are you wearing?â He whispers gruffly, sending a shock to my core. I stay quiet for a moment before he whispers a bit softer, âYou told me to keep talking. I wonât come in that room with you, but I am going to help you. Now, what are you wearing?â
               Though he canât see me, I nod quickly and glance down to my torso. Thankful for the black lace panty set cladding my body so I donât have to lieâŚI donât think I could lie to him right now, âMy underwear.â I whisper, holding my breath while I wait for him to speak again, âItâs black and lacy and I think youâd really like it.â
               He groans quietly and I can hear him lay down on what I assume is his own bed, âIâd like to see that.â
               âCome here and you can.â My breathing is heavy, anticipation building throughout me as I beg him, âPlease.â
               âPlease? You gonna beg me, Sweetheart?â He whispers lowly, the teasing tone spurs me on and I roll my hips against the pillow again, moaning louder as I do. I hear him suck in a breath before he continues, âTell me what you want me to do to you.â
âTouch me. Please, touch me.â I cry out, âI need you all over me.â
               He chuckles darkly, âI canât right now, can I? But, you can.â
 At his words my hips stutter, I glance down at the pillow as I slide back toward my headboard, âYou want me toâŚâ
âTouch yourself, Baby. Where do you want my hands?â His voice is low as he instructs me and I dust the hand not holding my phone across my chest as I listen to his breathing, âWhere do you want me to touch you?â
 âEverywhere. My chest, my legs, myâŚ.â I gasp as my fingertips rub over my clothed nipples; eyes still closed, I imagine his fingers being the ones ghosting across my frame.
I can practically hear the smile on his face when he speaks again, his voice quiet and heavy, âYeah, I wanna touch you there, too. I canât stop thinking about the things I want to do to you.â
âWhat else do you want to do to me?â I whisper, my hands making their way down my body at a slow pace. I play with the hem of my panties, imagining itâs his thick fingers there teasing me as he speaks slowly into my ear.
âI wanna spend all day between your legs, Baby. Wanna fuck you so good, you forget your name.â He whispers huskily, his breathing is heavier and I almost cum at the thought that he must be touching himself, too. I slide my hand into my panties and moan breathlessly at the feeling of relief that rushes my system. I circle my fingers around my opening, brushing my fingertips over the bud at the apex every so often
               âYou drive me crazy,â I groan, throwing my head back against the headboard as I picture his face between my thighs and all the filthy noises he would be making while he eats me, âI need more. You make me so wet.â
               He curses into the speaker and I can hear his breathing quicken, âTake off your clothes.â The harshness in his voice causes my eyes to snap open and rushes me to strip bare faster than I ever have. I remain quiet as I lay alone, listening to his rapid breathing on the other end of the line, âYou want me to fuck you, Baby?â
               I nod dumbly before realizing that he still canât see me and quickly recover, âYes.â
               âI want you on your hands and knees. Arch your back and touch yourself.â I nod again, rolling quickly to my hands and knees to do as he asks, âI canât see you, Sweetheart. Are you listening to me?â
               âYes, Sir.â I mumble as I rush to put the phone on speaker and roll my hips against my fingers, âIâm listening.â
               âGood girl.â He replies, chuckling as I moan at the name, âYou like that?â
               âYes. I love that.â I pant, rubbing faster against the bundle nerves between my thighs. My eyes roll back at the feeling and I try my best to focus on Deanâs voice as he continues to talk me through this.
               âAll those little sounds your making are getting me so hard, Darlinâ. I canât stop thinking about how good you must feel, about how good Iâd make you feel.â His husky whispers sends my imagination into overdrive as I raise up to sit on my heels. A single finger sinks into me and I moan out at the relief, âIâve been thinking about being inside you all day. Whatever you want me to do to you, Iâd do it. I want to be so deep inside you.â
               My eyes roll at his words, my breathing becoming heavier and I barely hear him when he asks, âYou close, Sweetheart? Want me to make you cum?â The teasing lilt in his voice urging my hands to move quicker, my fingers rushing in and out of my opening like lightening. My toes curl and my vision goes blurry as the orgasm crashes into me suddenly. His name leaves my lips like a prayer as I come down and I hear him grunt, whispering my name quietly against the phone speaker.
               My breathing is heavy when I finally speak, âThank you.â
               He chuckles awkwardly and I can imagine the way a blush covers his cheeks when he replies, âNo need to thank me, Darlinâ. I think I got just as much out of this as you did.â
               I laugh a little in response, feeling the hint of a blush rising in my own cheeks. The relief I feel is insurmountable and I can feel exhaustion taking over my body in exchange for the rabid horniness from earlier. âDo you think this is over? The potion, I mean.â I ask, waiting for the intense feeling of want to return.
               âGuess weâll have to wait and see.â He mumbles, âIf you need me again though, just call.â
               âWill do.â I reply, âWe do have a lot to talk about when Iâm feeling better thoughâŚâ
               He laughs nervously before trying to hide it as a cough before agreeing, âYeah, uh, we do.â
               âIâll see you after my nap, Dean.â I answer with a slight smile, âAnd then we can see just how quickly I forget my name.â
               He snorts and I can hear the smirk in his voice, âSet a timer, Sweetheart, it wonât take long.â
______________________________________________________________
Taglist: @lmhf1 @whimsyfinny @enigmalynne @envysarchive @aylacavebear @suckitands33 @oceean @mxtansy @k-slla
If you want to be added or removed from my taglist, message me! â¤ď¸
#supernatural#spn fanfic#spnfandom#dean winchester#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#sam and dean#jensen ackles#jensen fucking ackles#dean winchester smut
153 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Will-o'-the-wisp
Title: Will-o'-the-wisp
Fandom: Hunter x Hunter
Characters: Chrollo Lucilfer x Reader (female)
Summary: Reader encouters fae!Chrollo and breaks some rules along the way.
Word count: 1700+
Notes: yandere!Chrollo, fae!Chrollo, abduction, manipulation, AU, modern setting with fae, Chrollo is charming af and a bit creepy as usual, Reader is doomed long before they know it and slightly depressed
You walk home the same way every day, like many people do. There's comfort in routines. Comfort and security which you crave. The familiar routes, the repetitive programs on TV and the books you've read a million times. You like to know what happens next and hate surprises.
The fourteen-year-old you wouldn't approve.
Maybe even express a little pity, because she always thought you two were destined for an adventure, like in fantasy books you used to devour one after another. Every free second was spent reading or dreaming, but life went on and adventures didn't happen. The girl grew older, a lot more careful and a lot less hopeful.
When you finish work, it's usually around six. Your adult self is practical and prefers to save money on the bus, besides, every other time you take it, you end up having to stand, squeezed between people. It's not worth the frustration; a fifteen minute walk isn't that long and the crime rate in the area is low.
There's a small grove nearby that nobody has bothered to turn into a park. The residents made their own paths in time, put a few signs so the joggers wouldn't get lost, but that's it. Once or twice a month you stroll through there, picking up trash left on the side. People make you want to move to the woods altogether sometimes.
That's how the day starts or ends â with crossing a bridge which connects the grove to your neighbourhood.
And this is where you see him for the first time.
The man looks so out of place among the rustic wooden railings and rushing water below. Nobody wears this kind of clothes here. Expensive and elegant, something that blends well in a big city. They don't stare at passersby like he does either. You hate when people do that â block already narrow spaces by just stopping midway. Or groups who spread across the entire sidewalk.
"Excuse me," you say politely. Polite is good. Polite can be used as a shield and always makes you look better than you are. "I need to pass."
He smiles, then moves aside. "Of course."
His face is exactly what you imagine when thinking of pleasant: beautiful grey eyes with long lashes, pointed chin and a strange mix of delicate and sharp edges.
"Thank you."
The smile widens. "You're welcome."
---
It's time to accept that you've grown into an average person with a simple desire to live in comfort. Dreaming isn't your strength anymore, the last book you picked up was several years ago. Movies bore you fifteen minutes in, even if everybody else praises them; the idea of a relationship seems exhausting.
You do enjoy gardening.
Growing tomatoes is a far cry from distant fictional lands, but they taste nice with a pinch of salt.
The condo you live in doesn't have enough space and light, so you chose a small patch of ground in the grove to start a garden. A few tomato plants and some herbs like chives and basil. It might be illegal, yet nobody has come to yell at you. Most people don't pay attention to what's happening here, as long as you don't damage the trees or leave trash.
You water and prune, weed, add fertilizer if needed. There're some flowers too; mother told you that marigolds scare pests away from veggies and keep the soil healthy. They're pretty, little orange spots.
---
You find a crystal at you patch. Azure would be too bland to describe its color â maybe more like a mix of cerulean and moon stone. It's round in shape, polished so nicely that the outlines of your face are reflected in the surface. Did a magpie bring it? Or a kid? The thought of someone poking around your garden makes you frown. You hope they didn't step on your basil.
The stone is heavy and cool. You turn it around, entranced, before stuffing it into the pocket of your jeans. Maybe you can ask the neighbours' kids about it later.
"Would you look at that," you mutter and bend to inspect a tomato plant. Two green fruit, each no bigger than your knuckle, hang there, sprouted over the weekend. "Hello, my pretties."
---
You lie in bed, staring at the ceiling. It's past 1 AM, you should sleep; instead, you keep twisting the stone in the moonlight.
You asked kids from around here, but nobody claimed it.
Maybe it's a lucky charm, you've had a wonderful day. Got a call from your cousin in the morning, she has't contacted you in a long while and it was nice to catch up. After lunch, the resource manager praised your work, then an elderly lady from the store complimented your cardigan.
At a certain angle, the stone seems almost glowing. A summer night sky condensed into a tiny orb. Your fingers trace its smooth surface without much thought until eventually it drops onto the pillow by your side.
You don't notice when exactly you fall asleep.
It's the strangest dream you've ever seen.
Gone is the condo building with its stuffy kitchenette and old pipes that constantly rumble. Instead, you feel damp grass underneath your feet. Wind brushes through the hem of your nightdress, carrying the scents of rain and moss. So many shades of black and raven blue swirl together that you barely recognize a signpost nearby. It's the grove, but you've never seen it like this, as dark as it can be only at night.
It's uncomfortable to stand barefoot, with a chill creeping up your legs.
After a while your fingers touch the rough bark of a nearby tree to get a sense of direction, and you start walking, because there isn't anything else to do.
There's the bridge, you think. If you just get to the bridge, the rest will be simple.
You're walking there, or that's what you think when a small ball of light appears right before your nose.
Fireflies don't glow blue. It doesn't falter, doesn't flicker, coming up closer then farther like a pendulum. There's something uncanny and fragile about it. For a second you forget everything and stand mesmerized, until it starts moving.
Through the trees, past the branches, onwards.
It's more instinctual than anything â you don't want to be left here alone again, so you follow. Light is good, darkness isn't. The ground becomes more uneven as you go, the grass changes to moss, but you can barely register anything at this point apart from that lonely glow. It halts at times as if making sure you're keeping up.
Is that a clearing ahead? Your eyes hurt from trying to focus.
The blue dot continues to float, never speeding up, never falling behind.
Then it disappears.
No. Not disappears â settles on the tip of a pale finger.
There's your tomato patch, your plants, the empty box that you forgot to take back to the condo.
But it's impossible.
Your garden should be not very far from the border, yet it feels like you've walked through half of the grove by now.
Why is he here?
"It took you a while," he says, the stranger from the bridge whose eyes made you pause before you caught yourself. "I was waiting, my dear."
Maybe you shouldn't ask. Maybe the wisest thing would be to turn around and run. You step back and trip on a root which somehow snuck between the moss. He catches your hand before you fall and doesn't let go. Instead his thumb caresses your skin in leisurely strokes.
There's a faint scent of lilies coming from him, and something else. Something heavy, equally sweet that lingers on the edge of cloying and enticing.
Smells aren't supposed to be so strong in dreams.
"I need to go."
"Where?"
This simple question asked in an equally plain tone makes you falter. What does he mean 'where'?
"Home," you say softly and try to free your hand again without success. The man leans in close enough that you can see his face, illuminated by that blue light.
"And where is home?"
"I-" you swallow. "I have to go."
He releases you with surprising ease; you don't waste any time rushing towards the path. The long walk has exhausted you, and the lack of light makes it difficult to tell which turns to take. You stumble multiple times. The hem of your nightdress catches a few twigs. You sprint past the trees, past the low bushes along the familiar trail, and it's there, suddenly in front of you: the wooden bridge.
Out of breath, you grab the railing. And then open your eyes on the same side where you started.
How?
Again and again, you dash across it, yet every time there's a single step left to cross over the stream, the view shifts. Your feet land at the beginning of the bridge. On the ninth time when it's impossible to run any longer, you press your forehead to the railing. Every breath feels short and raspy.
"That's enough, dear."
"What is this?" You grip the planks with trembling hands. "I don't understand. Why can't I-"
A coat falls over your shoulders; you clutch at it mindlessly, because it's warm and you're shaking all over.
"You thanked me. Claimed my land, charmingly audacious of you. Such care and love, right under my nose."
There's no malice in his voice. Gently, finger by finger, he uncurls the tight grip of your hand. The stone is there, cerulean blue like summer sky condensed into a tiny orb.
"Took my gift and kept it close to your heart."
It takes some effort but eventually you manage to speak. "I didn't," you whisper urgently, despite the shiny proof in your palm. "I didn't know! Take it back."
"I'm afraid it's too late for that."
"I didn't know!"
He lifts you in his arms when your knees give out and you sink to the ground, still gripping that damned stone. His coat carries the same distinct scent of lilies and heavy sweetness. The sceneries you dreamed of when younger pop in your head, like old postcards covered with dust, of mystical beings hidden from human eye, fantastical places no one has seen, grand adventures where heroes defy impossible odds and come out victorious.
Those were tales for the brave and imaginative. You're neither.
"It doesn't matter. The land claims you," he says. "And so do I."
#shalott fanfiction#yandere#hunter x hunter#hunter x hunter fanfic#yandere chrollo#yandere chrollo lucilfer#yandere chrollo x reader
132 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Argument: M.S
Summary: You and Matt are arguing because he's being awfully loud, and you're on your period.
The evening had started off fine. Youâd both been sitting in the living room, enjoying a quiet night in. But that peace quickly shattered as Mattâs loud voice carried through the room like a sledgehammer. Heâd been talking non-stop about some random topic, laughing at his own jokes and rambling without noticing how overwhelming it was. You were curled up on the couch, trying to get comfortable despite the aching cramps that came with your period. You wanted nothing more than to curl up and zone out to a movie or even just close your eyes for a few minutes of silence.
But Mattâs energy was impossible to ignore. His laughter echoed off the walls, and his voice cut through the air with each sentence. It didnât matter how much you tried to focus on the TV screen or ignore the noiseâit felt like his presence was all-consuming, drowning you in sound.
You shifted uncomfortably on the couch, your lower back aching, your abdomen throbbing. Every movement made the cramps feel worse, and the constant noise made it harder to focus on anything but the pain.
Finally, you couldnât take it anymore. You turned to him, your voice tight with frustration. "Matt, can you keep it down?"
Matt didnât seem to hear you at first, his energy undeterred by your quiet request. He was too caught up in his own story, too wrapped up in whatever had him so animated. "No, seriously, man, Iâm telling you," he laughed loudly, his voice rising as he explained some ridiculous anecdote.
You clenched your jaw, trying to keep your cool. "Matt," you said again, this time louder, but with an edge to it. "Iâm not feeling good. Iâm on my period, and I have cramps. Can you just⌠lower your voice a little?"
Matt paused mid-sentence, finally catching your tone, but he didnât seem to understand the seriousness of it. He shrugged, not noticing how you were holding your stomach, trying to soothe the pain. "Whatâs the big deal? Iâm just talking."
You stared at him, the irritation bubbling up like a volcano. "The big deal, Matt, is that Iâm literally cramping in pain, and youâre yelling like youâre hosting a damn podcast! Can you show a little consideration?"
He frowned, clearly taken aback. "Itâs not like Iâm yelling at you. Iâm just talking loud because thatâs how I talk, alright? Youâre the one overreacting."
You could feel the frustration rising, the way the tension in your body was making everything worse. It was hard enough dealing with your physical pain, but now Matt was being dismissive of your need for quiet.
"Overreacting?" you scoffed, shaking your head. "Matt, Iâm literally sitting here in pain, trying to get through this, and all you can do is talk at full volume like itâs a damn comedy show. Itâs not about how you talkâit's about you being completely unaware of how you're affecting everyone else in the room!"
Mattâs expression turned defensive, his eyes narrowing. "You seriously want me to apologize for how I talk?" His tone was rising now, getting sharp. "Iâm not gonna start whispering just because youâre uncomfortable. Thatâs not my fault."
You felt your jaw tighten, your hands balling into fists. "Itâs not about whispering, Matt! Itâs about being mindful of the people around you! You never think about how your loud, obnoxious voice affects others. Itâs like you donât even care!"
Matt didnât back down. "I care! Iâm not trying to piss you off. Iâm just being me, alright?"
"Being you?" You could feel your patience snapping, the frustration boiling over. "Being you isnât the problem, Matt. The problem is that you canât be bothered to understand that people need quiet sometimes, and right now, I need some damn quiet!"
The words hit him harder than you expected. He took a step back, his eyes flashing with irritation. "You think I donât understand? You think I donât know youâre having a rough time? But that doesnât mean I have to change everything about me just to suit you!"
You stood up then, pacing for a moment, the cramps flaring up as you moved, but the anger took over. "Iâm not asking you to change yourself, Matt, Iâm asking you to be aware of other peopleâs needs for once. Is that too much to ask?"
"Yeah, itâs too much!" Matt shot back, his voice louder than ever. "Iâm not gonna sit here and apologize for talking! Just because youâre dealing with something doesnât mean I have to tiptoe around you like youâre fragile!"
You felt the tension in the room growing thicker, your chest tightening with frustration. "Iâm not fragile, Matt," you said, your voice wavering with a mix of anger and exhaustion. "I just need some goddamn peace. Can you give me that?"
But Matt wasnât backing down. His voice was cold now, defensive, as though he couldnât understand why this was such a big deal. "You think Iâm just gonna stop being myself because youâre having a bad day? Thatâs not how it works."
The words felt like a slap, and you finally snapped. "You know what, Matt? Maybe you should just leave me the hell alone!" You threw your hands up in frustration, the weight of the argument crashing down on you.
Mattâs face reddened with anger, his hands clenched into fists. "Fine! You want me to leave you alone? Maybe you should just deal with it yourself, then!"
His words stung, and before you could even react, you spun on your heel and started walking away. "Where are you going?" Matt called after you, but you didnât stop, walking straight toward the door.
You grabbed your jacket, throwing it on as you walked out of the room, trying to push away the wave of frustration that threatened to overwhelm you. "I need space," you muttered under your breath. You didnât even know where you were going at first, just wanting to escape, to get away from the noise and the tension.
"Wait," Matt said, his voice softer now, but you didnât turn around. "I didnât mean it like that," he called after you, but you kept walking, your heart pounding in your chest.
You didnât want to hear apologies right then, not after everything that had been said. You just needed a moment alone, away from the noise, away from the confrontation. You didnât know when or how the two of you would work through this, but right now, all you could focus on was finding some peace.
You didn't know how long you'd need, but you were sure of one thingâuntil Matt could truly understand the importance of being considerate, the fighting, the noise, and the misunderstandings werenât going to stop.
#matt sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#pov#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x you#matt stuniolo fanfic#argument
108 notes
¡
View notes
Text
đ˛ŕŁŞ Ö´ÖśÖ¸ ď¸Ö´ÖśÖ¸ LOVE HIDDEN IN PLAIN SIGHT đ¤. â yang jungwon.
pairing: idol! jungwon x fem! reader. content: idol au, childhood friends to lovers, reader is female, reader is not an idol here, reader got stood up (not by jungwon), confession, fluff. wc: 1.7k
FROM HYE: childhood friends to lovers troupe will always hit idc!!! idk why this became kinda long though, whoops... ALSO NO DOUBT AND DAYDREAM IS SO GOOD IM ASCENDING
This cannot be happening.Â
You sighed for the unknown time, leaning back in your seat as you tapped your phone. The screen lit up upon your brief contact but as always, there was no new notification from your boyfriend. Nearly an hour had passed and you were sure your current state was gathering unwanted pitiful glances thrown your way. You knew what they were thinking. In their eyes, they saw a dressed-up young adult, excited for her date with her boyfriend, only to get stood up and had been hopelessly waiting there, like a complete fool.Â
You finished the drink and decided to leave, having waited long enough. You stepped out of the cafe, the door gently closing behind you as you pulled out your phone to call the first person you thought of. It only took two rings before the intended receiver picked up.Â
âHello? (Name), arenât you supposed to be on a date with Sungjin?â Jungwon asked, concern evident in his voice. His questions put a smile on your face, probably at the fact that he knows your schedule for the day, despite how he was in the midst of practice when you heard music coming from his background on the other line.Â
Your prolonged silence was starting to scare the idol, who had stepped out of the practice room after signaling to his members that he was on a call. Jungwon frowns when his ears register the poorly stifled sounds of you sobbing. Hearing you breaking down is similar to getting shot in the heart.Â
â(Name), whatâs wrong? You know you can talk to me,â he continued in a soft and assuring tone.Â
âI⌠I got stood up. I waited there for an hour and Sungjin didnât turned up, making me look like a fucking idiot,â you replied through your tears, letting out a bitter chuckle.Â
Jungwon's grip on his phone tightened as he listened to you, his jaw clenching when he realized the pain in your voice. The news hit him like a blow: once again, you have been left standing alone, waiting for someone who clearly did not deserve you. His eyes darkened, a storm of anger brewing in them.
âWait,â he interrupted, his voice low but seething. âHe⌠stood you up? Again?â
You let out a sigh on the other end, trying to laugh it off, but Jungwon could hear the hurt behind it. That was all it took. He took the stairs instead of the lift, stepping out of the company. His sudden disappearance will surely cause his manager to be worried and how he had forgotten his mask would make the situation even worse. But none of that matters when it comes to you.Â
âWhere are you?â he demanded, his tone softening just a bit when he spoke to you. But there was an undeniable edge to his words, a mix of frustration and protectiveness that seeped through.
"Jungwon, you donât have toâ"
âJust tell me,â he insisted, his voice firm but reassuring. âI need to know where you are. Iâm coming to you.â
â...Iâm at the park we played at when we were kids,â you replied, knowing your childhood friend is very persistent when the times required him to be.Â
Somehow, your feet had led you to the place where you had created countless memories with Jungwon. You took a seat on one of the nearest benches, watching as people of all ages minded their business. Some were having fun with their children or partners. There were children running around the playground area, screaming at the top of their lungs as they chased one another. The sight made your heart soften, as you remembered how you and Jungwon were just like them; having the time of your lives before the harsh reality of life combined with responsibilities had taken over you.Â
â(Name)!âÂ
You turned at the shout of your name, eyes widening in pure disbelief at the sight of Jungwon rushing towards you without a care in the world. What rendered you speechless was how he had forgotten to hide his identity, resulting in the public stopping to openly gape at him. Some had even pulled out their phones to record him, ready to post it on the Internet. Flustered, you stood up, grabbed his hand and dragged him to your home.Â
When the both of you are in the privacy of your home, you turned and smacked him on his head.Â
âOw! What was that for!?â He yelped, rubbing the spot with his hand.Â
âYou idiot! Why did you run out in the midst of practice, and without a hat or a mask too!? Whatâs going to happen if your manager hears you ditch practice!â You scolded him, resembling a mother scolding her child.Â
âAlright, Iâm sorry! The thought might have slipped my mind when I heard you were crying,â he admits with a sheepish grin on his face, lowering his hand.Â
You sighed, rubbing your temples. âLook, itâs fine. You didnât have to come all the way here. Iâm sure Sungjinâs probably busy with work and he had forgotten to text me.âÂ
Jungwon gave you an unreadable look. âYouâre always making excuses for him.â He shook his head, running a hand through his hair as he tried to rein in his emotions.Â
âTell me, has he done anything good for you in this relationship? Has he ever gone out of his way to make you feel loved, or even just⌠appreciated?â
You were silent, and he took this as a chance to continue.Â
âBut what about you? You deserve someone whoâd show up without a second thought, someone whoâd want to be with you, not leave you hanging like this,â Jungwon continued.Â
You opened and closed your mouth. âIââÂ
He exhaled sharply. âYou donât get it, do you?â He said, his voice softer but laced with pure honesty that made your heart race. âIâve been here, right by your side, through all of it. Iâve watched you get your heart broken over and over⌠and every time, I keep hoping youâll see whatâs right in front of you.âÂ
You stared at him, the weight of his words sinking in.Â
âI canât stand seeing you hurt anymore,â he whispered, his eyes glistening as he held your gaze. âBecause I love you. And I would never leave you waiting, not even for a second.â
âJungwon, IâŚâ You struggled to find the words, feeling a mix of shock and confusion. âYouâve⌠always been there. I justââ
âYou didnât know,â he finished softly, looking down for a moment, a faint sadness in his eyes. âI know. I never wanted to push you or complicate things. I just wanted you to be happy.â He paused, swallowing hard, his voice lowering.Â
âBut seeing you go through this again, seeing someone else treat you like youâre disposable, when I know youâre anything but⌠I canât keep quiet anymore.â
Your chest tightened, a wave of emotions you had not expected crashing over you. All those times he had offered a shoulder to cry on, the countless moments had picked you up when you were at your lowestâhad they all been laced with feelings youâd missed? Slowly, you reached out, placing your hand over his. His fingers were tense beneath yours, but at your touch, he glanced up, searching your face with an expression that was both hopeful and terrified.
âWhy didnât you say anything?â you whispered, your voice barely audible.
He looked at you, his eyes raw with vulnerability. âBecause I didnât want to lose you. I didnât want to risk our friendship over something I could never take back.â His hand turned under yours, holding it gently as he continued. âBut now⌠I canât pretend anymore. You deserve someone whoâs there, through every high and low, someone who sees you for who you are.â
The words touched something deep within you, warming your heart in a way you hadnât expected. As you looked into his eyes, the realization hit you like a floodâJungwon had been that someone all along.
With a breath, you leaned closer, feeling a sense of clarity for the first time. âMaybe Iâve been blind,â you murmured, a small smile tugging at your lips. âBut now⌠I see you.â
A spark of hope flickered in his eyes, and without another word, he closed the distance, his forehead resting gently against yours. You saw how his eyes flickered to your lips for a brief moment. He was about to lean in when the moment was rudely interrupted by your phone ringing, causing you to pull away. Your face felt when you recognized the number. You were about to reject the call when Jungwon snatched the device out of your hand, accepted the call and put it on speaker mode.Â
âWhat are you doing!?â You hissed, but he merely shushed you.Â
âHello, (Name)? Oh my god, Iâm so sorry I missed out on our date. Are you still there? If you want, Iâm free now and we can have dinner together if you want,â Sungjinâs frantic voice echoed throughout your apartment.Â
âSungjin, is it? Sorry but your relationship with her is officially over. Iâll greatly appreciate it if you could leave her alone,â Jungwon nonchalantly replied, his thumb drawing circles on your knuckles.Â
â...Who is this? And whatâs your relationship with my girlfriend?â Sungjinâs voice turned cold but Jungwon was unfazed, turning to face you with a wide grin on his face.Â
âMe? Iâm her new boyfriend and now if you could excuse us, we have a date to tend to, goodbye and see you never.âÂ
âWaitââÂ
And just like that, Jungwon ended the call. He had even blocked his number, preventing your now ex from calling you anymore. You, on the other hand, burst out laughing. Jungwon puffed his cheeks.Â
âWhatâs so funny?â He pouts.Â
âN-Nothing, I didnât expect the leader of ENHYPEN to be this bold, but since when weâre going on a date and since when youâre my boyfriend? I think you have skipped a few steps,â you teased him once you had calmed down.Â
Jungwonâs eyes widened in realization. âOh! Then (Name), would you do me the honors of being my girlfriend?âÂ
Chuckling, you moved closer to press a chaste kiss on his lips. âOf course, Jungwon. Iâd be more than happy to do so.âÂ
He made a noise of happiness before engulfing you in a bone-crushing hug, to which you returned the gesture. âYou have no idea how happy I am right now.âÂ
âAnd whatâs the reason?â You inquired when he pulled away to admire your face.Â
Jungwonâs features softened as he cups your cheeks. âItâs because I finally got the prettiest girl and I can finally call her mine.âÂ
#ę¨ writings#enhypen imagines#enhypen x reader#yang jungwon x reader#jungwon x reader#jungwon imagines#jungwon x you#jungwon x y/n#jungwon fluff#jungwon scenarios
144 notes
¡
View notes
Text
alright, friends, it's time for a lil heart-to-heart.
for quite a while now, i've struggled with feeling like the rpc is an actual community. there's a few things that contribute to this feeling, but it mostly comes down to a lack of interaction and visible interest. sometimes i feel very one-sided in my interest and attachment to my mutuals bc when i see their ooc posts or headcanons, i like them or comment, yet this isn't reciprocated by everyone. i can usually guess who i'm about to see in my notifications, and to be absolutely clear, i'm very grateful for those people!! it's a handful or two of you, but it could be just one and i'd be grateful. it's not about numbers whatsoever but rather growing uncomfortable that not all of my mutuals are all that interested in my character or me.
i write on here to share the excitement of creating with other people. i write on here to create together, too, but i'm also here to share characters and ideas and lore with people i know are happy to hear me ramble. i'm just getting to the point in which i'm questioning how many of you are actually happy to listen, and that's just not a good feeling at all. i'm not a mind reader, y'all. if you don't tell or show me that you care about the things i talk about or even about interacting, there's no way for me to know. eventually, i'm going to question why you're following me if i never see or hear from you, and eventually, i'm going to softblock and move on. that's the only way forward i see right now because i just do not feel comfortable on my own blog. i feel like i'm retreating into this quiet bubble to avoid discomfort, and it really sucks. it's killing my muse.
i'm not perfect. none of us are, and we can't be online at all times to catch every little post. but if we're a community, then we should be supporting each other when we can and liking headcanons, liking/commenting on those lil ooc posts that remind us our writing partners are humans with lives outside this site, reblogging their promo posts, sending in that meme they've reblogged even if we're nervous to reach out first -- if we're a roleplaying community, then we need to act like it. " community " implies connection, and a connection doesn't really begin when you follow each other. it begins when you reach out, even if it's in some small way.
tldr: i think we can all do better to support our mutuals and to connect, and i'm going to softblock people rather than continue to feel unsure where i stand with my mutuals. i won't start until sometime next week, and i won't make one of those " like this to remain mutuals " posts. they're not helpful to me, if i'm honest. if you're worried, just reach out. i'm literally a 4'9'' gremlin who sleeps with a m.unchlax plushie -- i promise i'm not scary despite this post uvu
#if i reread this one more time my head will explode asdfg so i'm done and hitting post#i need to stress though i'm very thankful for the people i have connected with in small and big ways <3 it means a lot to me#but i've been told bottling things up isn't a great idea so it's time i was just honest#also iâve felt like this for a long time#so itâs not the time of year bc i know everyone gets busy during the holidays#iâm just feeling frustrated and tired bc in some instances my efforts do feel one-sided and this hobby is supposed to be an escape#rn itâs not such a great escape for me. iâm trying to be honest so that can change#iâm trying overall to reshape this blog a little in how i run it bc i want us all to have fun and feel seen#that means creating boundaries and being honest and trying new methods so that i donât get overwhelmed and can actually write and chat#with everyone that iâd like to write and chat with uvu#alrightâŚâŚ. i think thatâs it after iâve rambled in the tags asfhjk#iâll queue this and a bunch of other stuff later when iâve got time#for now i gotta finish getting ready for work â pls have a lovely day everyone!#get ready to ramble | ooc
32 notes
¡
View notes
Text
I know right??? This feels like people went âOh Jimmy and Scar are teamed? Guess theyâre going out quicklyâ and just kept pushing that. Which also annoys me because Scar just won SL???
They are on 3 lives, and there are three people with 1 life left.
The Bamboozlers are pretty high standing with lives too, all of their team is green and Lizzie has five lives. Which you canât say about some of the other teams. And now theyâre allies with one of the other teams with basically all their lives left (who are also strong)⌠yeah noâŚ
People just are staring at these guys so critically that they ignore any points that show theyâre not weak. If yâall are making claims at least back them up.
Sure Scar and Jimmy did both get to red, but theyâre back to green and that says a whole lot more.
Did not just watch a full episode of Wild Life in which both of Grian's teammates desperately try to get kills and both end up on red despite (and often because of) their effort, for you guys to keep saying Scar and Jimmy are getting eliminated next episode.
Jimmy has five fucking kills man. He's doing GREAT!! I know that people are attached to the canary curse, and this is Wild Life so I understand anything can happen, but come on. I will admit I don't have high hopes for Jimmy, but I really think people are selling him short this season.
Yeah Scar failed like eight traps this session, but he's still doing well. Ya know why? Because he's good at taking advantage of a situation. That man has six kills on Etho alone for a reason. Do none of you remember last season when Gem attacked Scar early on during the boogeyman apocalypse because she thought he would be an easy kill, and she had to RETREAT because he did too much damage on her?!?
The worst part is that no one is even claiming Jimmy and Scar are in danger for reasonable things, like the fact that Grian (who has the HIGHEST kill count in the series) has just declared them his number one enemies. Everyone is acting like they're both just going to throw themselves off cliffs three times next episode. Like yeah they can both be reckless players but they aren't stupid. They know to stay safe on red. Scar especially performs well on red. (He is a LOT like Joel)
Speaking of which! The Bamboozlers have happily made an alliance with the Family. Two of the strongest pvp players on the server. "But Jimmy killed Joel" yeah and Joel congratulated him because he thought it was a good kill. Scar and Lizzie have had alliances with the Family for a while, now that Jimmy's green there's no bad blood between them. And while I don't think Gem or Joel are gonna die saving any Bamboozlers (well, Joel might for Lizzie), having them on their side may slightly deter Grian's posse considering their desperate attempts on the Family's lives this episode.
POINT BEING: The Bamboozlers are ALL in a really good place at the end of this episode. Their whole team is green, they've secured an alliance with the Family, and they're all competent players. Y'all should be really worried about Mumbo right now. I'm worried about Mumbo.
#all rambles#this is just a building frustration from people not giving Scar the credit he deserves#this is just adding more to it#and now people are restricting Jimmy to only the canary curse and not an actual player#yes the canary curse is a fun idea to play with#but itâs not something that can be shoe horned as an excuse#Jimmy is fighting the curse tooth and nail this season and he has a good standing to last longer then he did in SL#Mumbo and Skizz are looking really bad currently#Mumbo got a kill but he also died trying to get another#Skizz *has* gotten some kills just not this session#I havenât seen Tango so I donât know how well heâs doing#he was red all session as well so he survived and didnât get a kill is what I know#so a pro and a con#I didnât mean to ramble even more in the tags- whoops#just was trying to say there are people closer to going out then Scar and Jimmy (especially both of them)#so people need to reevaluate some things
532 notes
¡
View notes
Text
Wasnât going to go on a big rant but you know what since that other post is gaining traction yeah I think I will. So big long rant under the cut. Lolll
I feel like. A lot of people might tell me âitâs not that deepâ but to me it is that deep.
I donât have a problem with JayVik or itâs shippers like. At all. I just think some of them are Ă really good demonstration of like. Every bad thing when it comes to fandom ever LMAO.
Once again I am (supposed to be) writing a whole big long essay about this already so I will try and keep this kind of short and sweet and it might be a bit lacking but wtvr.
I think a lot of JayVik fans tend to be white queer people. Someone left a tag on my OG post that said basically âmy take is Iâm a faggot and I donât have to care about a character if I donât want toâ and no hate to that person cuz youâre right, but this is exactly the kind of stuff that made me make that first post.
I feel like a lot of white queer people have an issue with seeing outside their own identity? If that makes sense? This is seen time and time again with the way some of them behave when big movements happen online, some have a tendency to centre themselves and whatnot so i think itâs kind of the same thing.
It makes total sense that a queer person would prefer queer ships and would prefer JayVik over MelJay, that is not a crime. But I do think part of that is because they canât relate/identify with Mel or see themselves in her like they can with Jayce or Viktor.
I hate to also make it about feminism but i think a lot of you guys are super like. Male centred, like just in your attraction which once again, not the issue not a crime. But i think itâs also why CaitVi, which is a canon queer ship, although popular is still not quite as popular as JayVik despite being canon. Women fetishizing gay men in fandom is not something new, which I think might play a small part in it- Iâve seen a lot of people especially back in s1 infantilizing Viktor and acting like he had no agency or independence and that he NEEDS Jayce to take care of him (thatâs another thing. Ableism(looks at you with my eyes)) and they also do the same thing with Jayce where they act like he had 0 agency with any decisions he makes and that heâs like a big dumb baby who doesnât know anything politics. Hey, guys. Thatâs a grown man.
My main issue isnât that people prefer JayVik over MelJay itâs just that some shippers demonize Mel to an insane degree, blame her for getting in the way of their ship (this is also happening right now with Maddie- thereâs a leak going around saying that she gets with Caitlyn and people are so upset that this character is getting some INSANE hate and I feel like thatâs the same thing going on.)
they blame her for âstealingâ Jayce etc etc like. Idk. You donât have to ship MelJay but I wish more people would appreciate Mel just as a character- imo she is super interesting and has a great story but sheâs only ever seen and âthe other womanâ. Iâve seen people say she isnât like, well characterized and that her story entirely revolves around Jayce which. Yeah sheâs definitely heavily involved with him in s1 but sheâs clearly got a lot more going on than just that and you would know that if you GAF đŁď¸đŁď¸
for just being. Who she is. I think Mel deserves more attention just in the fandom and itâs just frustrating. People making memes about Jayce going insane over Viktor leaving but like. Mel also just got fucking kidnapped guys. His lover has just vanished without a trace why is nobody also talking about that !!!! Why canât he care about both these people at the same time !!!!!!!
Anyway Iâm not nearly well equipped enough to talk more in-depth about like. Any of this but I do think the demonization of Mel and refusal to see her relationship with Jayce as it is can often times be boiled down to racism like straight up. And also things like the fetishization of gay men in fandom and just things like that are sometimes what can lead to female characters- even the well written ones to be shelved and pushed aside in favour of their male counterparts.
Obligatory ânot all JayVik fansâ obviously a lot of you are awesome, shouldnât have to say this. If Iâm not aiming for you, you shouldnât be getting shot.
#hope this doesnât ruffle up too many feathers eek#I was scared to make the first post I was worried JayVik fans would come at me#also idgaf about whatever was going on in league that lore has been retconned again and again and again#and as far as Iâm aware Viktor and Jayce didnât even like eachother that much#league and arcane are very much separate identities#Iâm p sure theyr changing the league lore to match wtvr is going on in arcane#if you prefer JayVik because itâs always been a thing thatâs fine but that doesnât excuse the mistreatment of a black female character#Yâknow?#idk#nobody kill me for this#arcane#arcane spoilers#MelJay#Mel Medarda#jayce talis#I won balls
91 notes
¡
View notes
Note
iâm hoping moonpaws âsinisterâ voice is some kind of misdirect. Like if the voice is moonpaws absorbed sibling then maybe it growing crueller in tone is a result of frustration with moonpaw or being stuck without control, a legitimate reason that will get resolved as opposed to just being Evil Voice In Her Head. Not to say this alternative would be perfect, it would still definitely tap into that stereotype, but at least it would be more well intended i think?? I donât know. Maybe if theyâre lucky the erins will even stumble into accidentally representing real struggles that people in systems have with their headmates
They have a slim chance to make this work, especially since they've probably maybe plotted out their story by now (who am i kidding. its the erins lol change on the fly bozos), but I think they could clutch this with a simple trick;
Treat The Twin like a person. That's all. Just. Allow it the courtesy of being a fully fleshed out character with actual feelings and motivations, not just spite at "having not lived", and absolutely not "we're a genetic anomaly and I'm EVIL because of it, so im haunting your bones for funsies"
Mind you, they're not great at writing nuanced antagonists... so I doubt the idea that they would even think to pull a misdirect with the "sinister" description. And it's still not great that they seem to be going in the direction of an "absorbed twin" and unironically doing Moonpaw And The Fetus Ghost...
BUT.
It is only a preview. They've changed lanes based on feedback before, with serious story overhauls, even (we die like warriors, Night/Sun Divorce Lovers). So... maybe they will end up doing something more subversive, treating both Moonpaw and her headmate with sympathy.
At the very least, we'll have fun rewriting the Terrible Cat Books together. We'll make something of it.
#It reminds me of Shadowsight's Epilepsy#Was it Great that they tied epilepsy to having visions and dreams of the future? no.#was it GREAT that they made the epileptic character get haunted by a supernatural entity? no.#But he happened. He was epileptic and that meant a lot to people.#The WORST move was ripping AWAY his epilepsy in the end after going through all of that-- saying it wasn't epilepsy at all. Just demons.#The only thing worse than a bad bit is a bad bit you can't commit to.#bone babble#moonpaw
79 notes
¡
View notes