#and i know im cutting it close but thats life sometimes

[dan-whoell]

im not gonna relax until im sitting in the chair. but i did in fact make it to orlando. like it's gonna happen. im gonna see them on stage. in person. same room.

[6mayhem]

anyway i need to hang out with my brother again he is the one person who i am pretty sure knows literally everything about me so he's the only person i trust that i can absolutely not disappoint. nothing i can do could be worse than the sum of everything i've been doing to that poor man (and him to me) the past 19 years

[dinopepitah]

This is a wip. I would appreciate if you do NOT reblog ;w;

[nastyburger]

Please say more about the awful Asian designs in Danny Phantom. I'm not Asian but I'd love to have a rundown on the elements that make them offensive so I can avoid and critique those elements in other works. And also you deserve to speak your mind about it

im gonna mostly talk about southeast asian designs since thats what i am and the most familiar with and also what i feel are the show's worst transgression with their casual depictions. tw for racist imagery im gonna link pictures.

there's not much to say about the designs aside from, you know, everything but things to note are the unnatural yellow tone for the skin and closed slanted eyes. veggie burger (fan name for the bg character in the middle) also suffers from the huge nose that sometimes shows up in racist depictions. the straight edge/cut hair as well is somewhat stereotypical. this one isn't as bad but in conjunction with everything else its not ideal. i will give the smallest molecule of credit that at the very least dp never gave any of these bg characters buck teeth.

some depictions are better than others, but theres still missteps happening in one aspect or another. kwan's eyes in a lot of shots/episodes can be too skinny and even too slanted, the girl in the middle is almost perfect but her skin is too yellow (she looks kinda okay on my computer screen but i remember when watching dp on my tv she looked real brightly yellow), and principle ishiyama (who was weirdly forgotten about pretty early on in the show and was replaced by lancer doing most of the school stuff despite not being principle?? which is a whole other issue with how dp treats its poc characters) the same usual notes about the slanted eyes but also the upturned nose is pretty reminiscent of racist japanese art during ww2. again it is not the worst way to draw a nose but combined with everything else in this show's depiction of asian characters its not great, they are on thin ice man.

not to mention, principle ishiyama is the only character here with brown eyes. this is a problem that extends to all poc characters in dp and to my knowledge i think ishiyama might be the only one with them tbh. this is, again, a whole other issue though.

i think the thing that bothers me most about these designs though is that dp is very clearly aware that these depictions are bad. the only difference between the first set of characters and the second is one singular thing: they have a clear speaking role.

suddenly when theyre not stock background characters, dp knows how to act when drawing them. i cannot for the life of me find the image of it, but the last jock guy in the first set gets a speaking role in reign storm (he's cosplaying phantom) and he is drawn with proper open eyes! (theyre also blue but whatever) it just makes me sad that this was a clear choice they made.

the show also went in a different direction in the final product, but early development stuff was really drawing from a lot of japanese/asian influences like danny was originally gonna have a motorcycle (pulling from ghost in the shell) and was even referenced in the show via the akira motorcycle reference (which i once again, for the life of me, cannot find. danny took johnny 13's motorcycle and did the classic akira slide i think it was in million dollar ghost?? idk whichever one where the giw are trying to blow up the ghost zone). danny's name was originally gonna be jackie, named after jackie chan, this i assume was given to jack fenton afterwards. and i think the show having a more martial arts direction with the action was also gonna be a thing? that one could be wrong dont quote me on that, there was an episode where danny and vlad have like a weird ninja fight though im pretty sure.

either way my point here is that they wanted to pull from all these influences and it was prominent enough during development that they sprinkle references to it throughout the show and yet their portrayal and treatment of asian characters in the show is so abysmal it just feels Bad™, you know? i cant really put it more eloquently than that, like its very take and no give with it.

it overall just puts a bad taste in my mouth, and its sad that it still affects people years later. like i mentioned in the tags of the post that started this discussion with that whole old trend of putting yourself into the bg of dp screenshots, i felt alienated by that. and its not the people who participated's fault obviously but most of the people i saw participating were white fans (going off of how they drew themselves) and it made me a bit mad that they were able to enjoy the style of the show in a more carefree manner than i ever could. i didnt want to ruin anyone's fun obviously, but a small part of me wanted to bring to light how i wasnt on equal ground with them in that situation.

[cursed-peanut]

Once there’s nothing left to destroy and no one left to kill, he comes to terms with the fact he killed Reader and becomes disgusted with himself. He’s officially became the monster Reader thought he was. The only fair punishment he deems for himself is to live out the rest of his life on this bare planet, wallowing away in the pain he stupidly caused himself.

thats literally poetic i would eat it up

ur so right ab their personalities i can def see it happening. i like how ur writing is very relative to the characters personalities. if u write angst i cant wait to read it

if u go w the gojo idea, imagine seeing sukuna manipulate reader using their love for him to find out stuff for him or to help him out n stuff, and the reader hates it but hasnt ever known any other love, and thinks this is like normal until gojo finds out and is so betrayed bc he thought the reader was close bc reader liked gojo back

reader going out of japan and sukuna becoming a good guy (im delusional) n all n finds her his whole life only when he does shes moved on n stuff and like doesnt even remember him that well, now that would make me cry rlly bad 💀💀 - 🍥

Thank you!! I truly think that that is how everything ends in this AU. Reader can no longer look past Sukuna’s actions, so they move on completely, leaving all shackles of Jujutsu Society behind. But Sukuna can’t accept that and becomes loss of purpose and overwhelmingly angry, so much so he destroys everything and regrets it for all eternity once he’s calmed down and realised what he did.

And I’m glad you think so! I’m sometimes worried I write them ooc (I mean, soft Sukuna is VERY ooc, but like, other than that I mean lmaooo), so I’m happy that my depictions of them are right.

I will definitely explore the Gojo idea, but I don’t think it would be the canon idea. Or at least where Reader reciprocates the feelings. It could possibly come close, but then Sukuna’s like “nah, you’d lose.” And kills him.

But yes, no matter if Reader was to reciprocate Gojo’s feelings or not, Sukuna would know and would definitely use your obliviousness to Gojo’s feelings and devotion for him to his advantage and manipulate Reader into giving him information about Gojo.

Now Reader is a kind soul, even though they love Sukuna and he’s told them time and time again that this is okay and it’s for the greater good, deep down Reader knows they shouldn’t be doing this and it eats them alive. Therefore, I’d like to think Gojo would immediately know something is up.

When he questions Reader, they would immediately crumble telling Gojo everything that Sukuna knows thanks to them and he’s not gonna lie, he feels absolutely betrayed and heartbroken that while he thought you were finally reciprocating his feelings, you were secretly telling Sukuna everything. I think this is where Gojo would properly start honing in on the idea that Reader should stay away from Sukuna and telling them he isn’t healthy for Reader — despite being heartbroken. Maybe if you cut contact with Sukuna, you will fall for him this time?

The plasters ripped off and Reader’s view of Sukuna shatters as they finally realise who Sukuna truly is. Completely overwhelmed and heartbroken that Sukuna would use them like that, this would be when Reader leaves Japan.

And yk what? Sukuna becoming a good guy is extremely delulu icl, but soft Sukuna is already delulu enough, so why not go the full mile? 😂

I honestly love this idea! It’s definitely not something I would make canon but something — like if Reader started dating Gojo — I would like to explore at some point!

Imagine Sukuna realising how shitty of a boyfriend he has been when Reader left. He was so focused on creating the perfect future for Reader and him that he completely neglected Reader’s feelings during the creation process, so he stops his plans, changes his ways (mostly) and focuses on trying to find them.

After a few years of searching, he finds Reader in a country far from Japan with a completely new life. Itadori warned him before he left that finding Reader probably wouldn’t end well, but he ignored him. He now wishes he’d listened to his bratty nephew. Reader had a dotting, human boyfriend, worked at a bakery, had a nice welcoming home and had completely moved on from him.

He was unsure about approaching them at first, but he regretted when he did because you had to rack your mind for a good minute before recognising him. But that wasn’t even the worst part. When Reader recognised him, their face morphed into pure fear as they just stared back at him. Waiting for him to do something. Perhaps kill them for running away from him.

“I see you’ve created a lovely new life.”

Reader warily nods as tears prick the corners of their bloodshot eyes. This is it. This is the end.

“Promise me that no matter what life throws at you, you will live a life you can be proud of.” And with that, he turns and leaves them alone. Forever.

Thanks again 🍥 anon for the yummy angst thoughts :333

————————————

Taglist: @makuzume @spicyhyunn @pearlescentwonderland @namjooningera @six-eyed-samurai @natriae @domainofmarie @lixern @fluttershyfangs @girlyuuta @anabort @yu-87 @sukunaglazer4ever @madison777x @dervngedgf @calisnewworld @ilybbg @the-banshee @mostnormalsukunastan2024real @williamafton26 @mythoswarrior-23 @megantheefan @mindless-rock @kimsunoo2003 @anayesha1 @shyshybabyy @unlikelystay @shigemis0ra @iloveboysinred @eresel4mordemivid4 @meo66 @frozen-waffles @mrsslytherin00 @lazyperfectioniste @whosmarjj @itawifeyy @sugurubabe @hanniebanggi @mrs-monkey-d-luffy @sukunadckrider @shadowlover321 @mwtsxri

Please don’t copy or take as your own. Likes and reblogs are appreciated!

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[drdemonprince]

this will sound like one of those "let men be masculine" level niche internet community brained posts, but i honestly really was embarrassed of how much i like drag for a while. in the circles that i run in, liking drag too much is seen as pretty cringey and for wealthy cis gays. like everybody knows a few cool avante garde local performers that they fuck with who run queer dance parties that are inclusive and the like, but very few people that i know will just go to a drag show at an entertainment or social engagement for their own sake. it's almost seen as a tourist thing, a normie gay thing.

but its one of the few spaces where i can actually recognize a lot of feminine men and nonbinary man-thing-girly-freaks like of the particular type that i am. leather bars are so masc and buff and im often invisible. bear bars are really nice and i do feel welcome there! but people are only feminine in their mannerisms, not presentation very often. the more explicitly gender inclusive trans/queer spaces cater to more of a wlw and adjacent crowd whose relationships to masculinity and femininity are different from mine. circuit gay bars are obviously terrible.

drag is nice. there's guys with weird little haircuts and long earrings who aren't buff and are swishy and dress interestingly but are a little uncomfortable as their regular selves and have to don alternate personas in order to be outgoing. and i even like that it's okay to be bitchy and insulting sometimes in drag world, like sometimes that is just your genuine feedback on the work someone has done and it's not the end of the world. there's lot of open conflict in the drag world that actually works out pretty alright.

it's a local nightlife scene like all the rest, its got its theater kid bullshit and egos and superficiality out the ass and so many people are trying to be famous or make money, but even to this day i forget that i can just be a really weird feminine guy until i'm around some of them and watching them prance about. i worry about how i look or am being read and then even just watching a fucking drag race episode i'll see like 9 different guys who are so fucking androgynous with their weird assymetrical self cut haircuts that they pass less than i do and they're cis men. they have bodies or faces like i do. and in the local scene it's obviously even better because you're looking at real life people. maybe i should be over it by now but im not, i need to see weird little awkward feminine guys with funny outfits playing dress up and crying and fighting with one another because they never got over their last picked in gym class baggage. its meeee i relateee. i even like that its a little toxic! we've got some issues out here, let's joke with them and make a character of them instead of pretending to be nice!!

i tend to be pretty skeptical of "representation matters!" type shit but part of that is probably because i never really feel represented. i know, boo hoo, thin white man doesnt feel depicted on screen, sounds very silly. but then i see kade gottmik on drag race and i swell with emotion and suddenly feel like who i am is POSSIBLE in this world and i realize that even with all my privileges i am starved for representation and that it does benefit you to have it. theres trans guys on screen but thats not close enough to ping that ooh!!! ahh!!! i can love myself!! radar for me. it has to be a very particular kinda person. matt bernstein makes me feel similarly

[burningcrab]

how im imagining ᵐʸ drifter's relationships with the hex. obvy subject to change once the expansion drops and we get to know them better

arthur: you know the sibling thing where you go open your sibling's door and talk to them about stupid shit and then flip them off or something and walk away without closing the door. she does that when he's in the security office. beyond that i don't think they have much of a personal relationship. years of fighting solo in duviri means she struggles with having a commander so she probably gives him heartburn when she fucks off to do her own thing in the field

aoi: they should be at the club. specifically drifter should be at the club learning how to stop fumbling women. aoi gets them shots because drifter says she doesnt get drunk. sadly drifter has only been drinking weird duviri beer as imagined by a teenager for most of her life so the first time she gets drunk off tequila and fireball and shit she freaks out and thinks shes actually dying and turns invisible in the bathroom. aoi drags her back out to dance and then they have a homoerotic midnight atomicycle ride back to base

lettie: seething because learning vazarin healing backfired and now her stupid void body won't let her manufacture "accidental" injuries. she can't even get a paper cut and ask lettie to kiss it better because she heals too fast. drifter is down horrendous for lettie but between immunity to mild injuries and a fear of rodents its just a disaster. meanwhile lettie likes drifter more than any of the rest of the team because at least drifter's dumbass attempts to play hero on missions don't require intensive care afterwards like arthur's "Tank Incident"

amir: listens and nods while amir explains the gameplay of caliber chicks 2 at 225 wpm for six minutes. tries playing with him but doesn't get the appeal so she just sits around while he plays and offers unhelpful and irrelevant advice whenever he dies. like "you should try parrying" when he loses tetris or "do a bullet jump" in a racing game. she also steals his energy drinks, which is probably good for amir but definitely bad for everyone else who has to deal with hopped-up drifter

quincy: drifter works best with him in the field out of all the hex members. he says it's because she's really good at being annoying and distracting and getting in the enemy's face with a shotgun so he can line up his shots. she says this is true, and thank you very much quincy thats sweet of you. drifter loves to be annoying and quincy is the only one smart enough to weaponize that. drifter is also permanently banned from shooting contests with quincy after she blew a hole in the wall with a plasma shotgun instead of using a normal gun for target practice

eleanor: oscillates between wanting to help eleanor and getting annoyed with her cryptic bullshit. also oscillates between thinking the mind control/telepathy thing is completely terrifying and thinking its awesome (and kind of hot). absolutely cannot stop asking eleanor weird questions and will keep it up until she gets the psychic equivalent of a sucker punch and her nose starts bleeding (which heals before she can get to lettie). sometimes she tells eleanor stories about the lotus.

[scrumptiousstuffs]

hi scrumptious! (back in the days when your name wasn’t displayed i always remembered you as scrumptious so im just calling you that way, sorry sueee lolol)

let’s go to delulu land! im building this opinion since khaotung said he loved first as kant, and how he always says that. Sometimes i think is just his way of trying to say to first to act more like kant, i don’t know how kant is but just by the trailer i can say he is very into physical touch and maybe khaotung is just craving this. First already said that khaotung never let go of his hand when they were filming, holding even when were screamed “cut”. At the same time, i think first is afraid to be much touchy with his bestie and casually fall in love (they already are) he seems like someone who will hold his feelings and never do anything about it (when it comes to liking his bestie friend who is also his coworker). And khaotung, by saying all this stuff waits to first do something so he can react and loose himself in him.

im really delulu, i feel like they are just like akkayan in some aspects but maybe thats just me. tell me your insights about all of this!!!

Hello anon!!!! I see we are becoming even more delulu 😂.

But I don’t blame you, THK era has highlight even more how our boys are so sticky with each other (for the lack of better term).

From the boys casually sitting on top of each other (as evident by the many BTS videos/photos taken by others) to their Polycat concert shenanigans plus Jojo pretty much giving up and saying “I don't know what to tease you two about anymore” during the THK wrap up party; clearly these 2 are no longer as shy in displaying their close relationship (and I'm all here for it!) - so, I'm not exactly sure what you meant by KT craving more touch (from First) because it seems they are already all over each other (highlighted even more so with the recent THK Press Tour! - so adorable!!!!).

I also mentioned in a previous ask that when these 2 are excited/can't control their emotions/feel comfortable with their surroundings, they really do treat each other bodies like an extension of their own. The casual touch and gesture with the other party just accepting it is so fascinating to me (cause I'll tell you now, I don't even like my own family members touching me most of the time). I am also taking the opportunity to shout out to Joong/Dunk being FK adopted sons (or if in Dunk/Khao case, the latter being everyone's sunshine baby to the point even the THK admin pointed this out...🤭)

We already know KT adores First as Kant (he has said countless of time he finds Kant the best character so far out of their series, which I still find funny, cause I think the interviewers/host from KT party was actually asking him what's his fav role to date and he just goes off tangent and promote his soulmate instead hehe). Is it because Kant is meant to be this flirtatious, suave tattooist who pulls all the move to make sure Bison (and by default KT as well hehe) trapped in his allure? Who knows? Maybe! But, we all know, it is Bison who really holds the power in their relationship (at least in the bedroom anyway, 😆). I get the impression though, while Kant may have fallen for Bison first - once Bison commits to a person, he will be fiercely protective (and murderous, 😅) on behalf of his loves ones (so, when Bison finds out of Kant's deception, all hell will break loose)

Either way, since both boys are method actors, I have no doubt that there are some element of their characters seeping into their real life persona a little bit (especially KT, where FK admits KT always take longer to come out of character) - so, him clingy to First and refuse to let his hands go even after they finish filming, oh yes? This tracks nicely! Also that recent comment by First saying the KT he has to deal with at 6am is very different with the KT he deals with at 7pm??? (which ahem, also tells me, these 2 are TOGETHER pretty much 24/7. I mean we all expected this but its nice to have confirmation).

Look, I truly don't know whether these 2 are in a romantic relationship (in my delulu world, these 2 are in a comfortable spot where they know themselves what they meant for each other but is just letting everyone else make assumptions 😏). Either way though, I am eagerly waiting for Khaotung (or First) to casually drop a bombshell they are now cohabiting in KT's brand new house (whenever that will be completed) - because you just wait, they will drop this random fact suddenly or might pull a EarthMix move 😉

You have no idea how much this ask meant to me. Cause not only has it not been a shitty day in general from the news we have at present (why America? 😭), but also I am still getting asks from anti-CPs or solo F/K stans who are (for god knows why) trying to convince me of their narrative (like the fact I’m no longer answering those asks mean something?)

So, your delightful ask about FK and us being delulu - I’M ALL FOR IT. Let’s all stay in delulu land forever 🤍🧡💫.

(source of pictures/gifs in the pictures)

07/11/2024

[lcvekatsuki]

. . c h a p t e r 01 . . .

“struggling to find my way”

The bus ride was shakey and bumpy as it swayed across the city of Musutafu, Japan. My hands clung tightly to the metal bar that was above my head. I could hear the beats of my heart pumping through my ribs.

I was going to the best police department in the world, UAPD ( U.A police department) it would be an understatement if I said I was nervous. I looked out the window seeing the sun beaming against the city’s tall scrapers. People bustling around and walking trying to find their purpose.

I always had a thing of wanting to help people or maybe even save them? But there was always one person in your life, you can’t save.

My phone rang from out of my purse, picking it up I see the caller id.

Akio.

My brother who’s been on the run for two years and I helped him. Even if I wanted to I couldn’t say no, he was my . . . Brother. But now im stuck in a rabbit hole because of him.

I swiped answer on the phone and lifted the phone to my ear. “Akio you know you can’t call me on this phone, they’ll track you and they will find your location.” I whispered my face filled with disdain.

If anyone knew about this, I could go to jail and I would lose my opportunity to be a cop.

“Sis c’mon , they probably forgot about me. It’s been two years, and relax this is a burner phone.” He chuckled causing me to glare.

It confuses me how calm he could be in this situation , he is a run away criminal. I took a deep breath and looked at the phone. “Okay, okay, just stay safe and stay indoors. I’m going to pay your rent and send you the money next week, kay?” I questioned leaning my head back further into the seat.

Since he was a criminal , he was also flat out broke and couldn’t get a job because it would alert all the high end police. Posters with his face were everywhere , so I took it of myself to pay his rent and give him money.

Which meant I had to work triple jobs, and it barely covered my small apartment as well. Thats why I want to become a police officer, it pays well and im doing something I love.

Greedy I know.

“Got it baby sis, thanks a lot for everything . Love ya !” He chimed causing a tiny smile to form on my lips. Waving goodbye to him , I close the video chat call.

The bus made an abrupt stop and i knew was my stop. I could see the UAPD’s huge building in the distance. Sliding my phone in my purse I walk out the bus.

Clutching it tightly my sneakers kissed the concrete as I walked towards the large building. Remeber when I said it was huge , yeah it’s bigger than that.

I breathed in and out as I looked at the large sign ontop that said UA police department. Opening the glass doors, collecting eyes from people waiting in the building. I lifted my ID that hung around my neck, letting them know that I now work here.

Entering the elevator, I was about to press floor number 2 until a girl with pink frizzy Afro hair and beautiful brown carmel skin ran to it sliding in . (yes i imagine mina black when its quirkless , im sorry if you don’t . just imagine something else)

She huffed and breathed loudly with her hands on her knees. “H…h..hi im Ashido Mi…Mina.” She managed to say lifting her hand up.

I was hesitant but I lifted my hand up to hers giving it a firm shake. “L/n Y/n.” I firmly said as I glanced at the necklace that hanged around her neck , a detective badge.

Mina giggled as she saw where my eyes landed. “Sometimes I don’t even know how I landed the job.” She teased. “Also , are you new ? I never saw you around.”

I nodded my head softly, pressing my palms together as the elevator started to move. “I’m a rookie in training… this is um, my first day on the job.” I sighed as I was token surprised my Mina’s arm being wrapped around me.

She squealed as she held my so tight I felt like my circulation was cutting off. “You’re such a cutie Y/n ! Oh wait I can call you by your first name right?” She questioned as her big brown eyes looked at me , batting her long eyelashes.

Mina seemed very nice, at the academy I had 2 friends. But they weren’t like Mina, Asuka and Kyoko would always make nasty comments on how I didn’t deserve to be at the academy.

And they were right.

“Um , yeah you can. Can… I call you also by your first name?” I squeak out nervously, maybe I was misinterpreting everything maybe she didn’t want to be my friend-

My legs felt like they were being lifted off the floor as Mina picked me up and spun me around, causing me to let out a little snort.

“Ofcourse you can girl ! We’re deft going to be best friends.” She giggled as she put me down , the elevator dinged and the doors opened. We both walked into room 1-A , it was surprising that we were both in the same zone.

Mina then paused as she face palmed. “Oh shit , I forgot my phone downstairs I’ll be back Y/n.” She yelled already taking off.

I couldn’t help but giggle quietly as I opened the glass door , the room was almost full with some seats empty . there were different officers from different branches present in the room , I could see from their tags around their neck.

I pursed my lips as I walk toward the back , sitting in an empty chair that was two seats away from a guy with an electric bolt in his yellow hair . Murmuring was present but I ignored it , already used to it , I plugged my AirPods in my ear as I waited for everything to start .

A few minutes passed by an empty chairs soon to be filling up . a large figure with red pretty hair sat next to me , I would steal glances at him admiring his hair .

I wonder if it’s soft or not .

Our eyes caught each others and he was about to speak to me until a loud voice and looming figure was in front of me. “The fuck are you doing in my seat?” Bakugou hissed , his crimson eyes looked down at me like I was the most disgusting thing he ever saw .

And that’s when it clicked , it was THE sergeant Bakugou Katsuki . The prodigy of the police academy , everyone knew his name . His remarkable marks on every test , outstanding skills, am-

“Do you fucking hear me you deaf extra?” He spat in my face , his eyes were scrunched like he was threatening me . I looked around and saw everyone was staring at me , I swallowed hardly , and gathered my stuff with a trembling hand and quickly walked upfront .

I could fear a tear forming from my eyes and racing down my skin . Why am I crying ? Why can’t I stop ? I quickly wiped the tear away as I lowered my head .

Soon the room was packed and chairs were filled , a commanding figure with bags under his eyes and black messy long hair . I could already tell it was Commander Shota Aizawa. He was the one who hand-picked me to join UAPD.

“Settle down and listen up , we have fresh blood joining us today . ” he crossed his arms with a slight smirk as he looked at me .

“Introduce yourself , rookie . ”

[conanssummerchild]

Ok I really need to see if other people think the same in this and needed mootie input: Rick hyperfixations... aren't dealt as well as they should by Morty nor Summer

Like Summer ENABLES it to unhealthy point and Morty doesn't seem to want to know it enough soon cutting strings to things like the crow hyperfocus despite Rick never really closing the walls for him to come too

.... thoughts?

ooh okay, first off i just wanna say that i love that rick is shown to like full on unhealthy hyperfixate bcs real. i mean its not great for him and his wellbeing but its great for me loll, love the representation

anyway, to continue i'll preface that it probably shouldn't be summer and morty's responsibility to look after rick seeing as theyre 17 and 14 but also who else is going to? beth should bcs yk hes her elderly father but yk she definitely wouldnt

and to the actual point of this ask, summer i feel like just doesnt really get like the extent of the unhealthiness of ricks hyperfixtations, i mean finding prime he basically tore apart his life (i mean, even more than prime already had) but she wasnt there for that, wasnt even alive for half of it, with the gotrons she was wrapped up in her own stuff and with crow rick she wasnt really involved in the situation, etc. she gets that rick does that sometimes but she doesnt really see like how its taking a toll on him, she seems to look up to rick so ig she just assumes that whatever hes doing hes just doing idk

and then with morty we can kind of assume they've had an at least minimal conversation about it seeing as he says that rick asked morty to remind him that enough was enough, so that's not just morty intervening, its rick actually having asked him to, so i guess they've talked about it a little, wonder how that conversation went. overall morty is closer to rick than summer and is more aware of ricks habits and other things so i do think he would be able to kind of identify when rick is starting to neglect himself to pursue a hyperfixation when he does it openly, like in gotron jerrysis rickvangelion, whereas for example in the knights of the sun episode he would've had no way to know because rick just dissapeared and replaced himself. as for the crows episode i feel like its less about morty not knowing rick was hyperfixating and more about the fact that he was too emotionally invested in the situation, while summer was detached from it, morty was too close, to him it felt like rick was abandoning him (which, well, he was) it didn't matter why, he was hurt, not focused on whatever rick was doing (which again he shouldnt have to be)

sooo yeah anyway thats my hot take 🫡 or cold take maybe, idk what im yapping abt

[pharaohbean]

secret admirer

original upload: june 20th 2024 on ao3

summary: "'Despite it all, despite his tears and anger and destruction and hunt, there was one thing that he could not deny. // His love for [him] had never left.' Dan Heng has more secrets than just his previous life; there are things from this current life that he would have rather kept tucked away in a corner, never to think about again. But sometimes, good things can come out of bad timings."

tags: Dan Heng/Caelus, Dan Heng/Trailblazer, March 7th/Stelle | Caelus is an Emanator of Destruction, Lord Ravager Caelus, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending,

warnings: none

author's note: "if you've been following me, hi. im alive. sorry for the sudden disappearance, i had black belt training… and then black belt seminars… and the the black belt test itself… which was 5 hours long. but i did it!! also tech support for vbs slapped me around right after. fyi, i play hsr with the jp voices! so if something sounds maybe a lil funky thats why"

“Hey, hey! Dan Heng!”

Dan Heng looked up from the entry he was recording into the Archives—of course, one of the many books Stelle had taken from some poor hapless soul’s desk—straight into March’s glimmering eyes. He took a deep breath mentally before sighing physically.

“Yes, March?” The archivist turned to her. The girl suddenly turned bashful, looking down to her feet and kicking them on the dirt-free floors.

Not very dirt-free anymore , Dan Heng grumbled for a moment. “Is everything alright, March?” He asked.

“Well, uhm… so, y’know, Stelle joined our crew recently, and she and I have been hanging out a lot on the space station and Belobog, and, well, I really enjoyed being around her, and she’s super fun to be around—I mean, ignoring her trash-diving habits but whatever—but she’s really aloof and I’m an amnesiac and that’s never bothered me, of course, but—”

It was at this point that Dan Heng realized two things: one, that March 7th was nervous and anxious—a shocking look on the girl that’s almost always been energetic ever since the Express rescued her—and that two, because of this fluttering she was experiencing, she was rambling.

“March, please cut to the point.” Dan Heng said sternly, yet not unkindly. March blinked, then flushed briefly.

“I was rambling, wasn’t I?” She murmured. At Dan Heng’s shrug, she continued. “Well, uhm, what I wanted to ask you was… uh…”

Dan Heng raised an eyebrow. What could really get March this nervous? After a moment or two (probably hyping herself up, Dan Heng reasoned) March spat out everything she wanted to say at once:

“IwaswonderingifyouknowwhatbeinginlovewaslikebecauseIthinkI’minlovewithStelle!”

It took the archivist a moment to fully decipher the run-on sentence that had flowed out of March’s mouth like an arrow she fired off. But when she did, Dan Heng’s eyes widened and he immediately turned away.

Had he known what being in love was like? Memories he’d long since buried away trickled back to the surface like the haunting drip-drop of water within his cell from decades prior— a bond formed through coincidence, the lingering trail of footsteps, a flash of gray hair, golden eyes, and a bright smile —and his heart clenched.

The answer that came out of his mouth was a well-rehearsed one: “No. I’ve never experienced love myself.”

“Oh… I see.” March said, her voice quiet. “Well, thanks anyways, Dan Heng.” He stood stock still as she turned to open his door before he spoke up again.

“March.” He turned slightly to see the girl freeze out of the corner of his eye. “Just… don’t wait too long. I know that even if Stelle doesn’t like you back, she won’t let that ruin the friendship the two of you have.”

March was quiet for a while before looking at him. Dan Heng flickered his eyes away, incapable of locking eyes with the deeply empathetic archer lest she see what truly lied within himself.

“...Thanks, Dan Heng.” He could hear the smile in her voice as she left the Archives. When she closed the door behind her, Dan Heng could only sigh. Leaning his forehead against the closed Archive interface, he was powerless to stop the onslaught of memories from overwhelming him.

It was long before he’d even heard about the Astral Express. Back then, Dan Heng was little more than a Vidyadharan mercenary, having left his home Xiangzhou ship for reasons that he refused to speak about. That was fine—if he wouldn’t talk, they wouldn’t ask.

(That wasn’t entirely true, he admitted much later in life. Some people were incessantly nosy into his history, but they learned quickly why he was someone to be feared.)

While working on a ship as a guard he encountered a truly unusual yet mystifying man.  He didn’t look like a ship worker, nor did he look like the mass of mercenaries Dan Heng had encountered over time. The gray-haired man, however, bore an aura that Dan Heng hadn’t ever encountered before in his years on the run—even the man chasing him, whose power refused to let him die despite both of their wishes to do so, wouldn’t have stood a chance against this man.

When the unusual man looked over, Dan Heng felt something strike through his soul as soon as his molten golden eyes locked with his own steely gray. The man blinked at him, pleasantly surprised, before a smile graced his lips and he wandered over.

“My, my, I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone who looks quite like you.” The man said; for a moment, Dan Heng panicked, wondering if his appearance had reverted to that old form of his, a form that only brought hate and ridicule anywhere he went, but the stranger’s expression only softened.

“Don’t worry, I see a lot of things other people cannot. Whatever it is that you’re hiding, I swear it’s safe with me. My name is Caelus, what’s yours?”

“...Dan Heng.” The guard nodded carefully. Caelus only smiled back, then launched into conversation. He talked and talked and barely let Dan Heng talk after the first few questions, but Dan Heng didn’t feel ignored—rather, it was as if Caelus had realized that Dan Heng didn’t want to talk and filled the silence for them.

It unnerved Dan Heng that he was seen through so easily. But he brushed it off, thinking that after their mutual job (apparently Caelus had also been hired as a guard, filtered from his long ramblings) the two of them would never cross paths again, that the banished Vidyadhara would never have to meet the unusual man again.

But Caelus returned, time after time. After he’d thrown an arm around Dan Heng, appearing as a guard on the same ship as Dan Heng once more, Dan Heng finally asked the man: “Are you following me?”

Caelus only gave him a sly smile. “Perhaps.” No more was said between them on that.

As the years passed, turning into decades, approaching a century, Dan Heng grew closer and closer to the unusual man named Caelus. Opened up little by little—

(Never about his past; he told this as much to Caelus, not ready to share the darkness of the first decades of his rebirth, and his companion only replied: “Well, that’s good, since I’d rather not speak about mine, either.”)

—and before he knew it, his heart had opened up as well, finding safety in the man’s presence. Eventually, Caelus was standing by his side even after their job was done. And then one day—

(“What was that for?” Were the first words spilling out of Dan Heng’s mouth, eyes wide.

Caelus scoffed, nervousness hiding underneath his vocal facade. “What, did you not like it?”

“I never said that.” Dan Heng mumbled before diving right back in.)

—their relationship changed, from mere coworkers to something much more. And years passed, laughs and smiles shared together. It would be a lie if Dan Heng said that those weren’t the happiest years of his life.

And then he made a mistake. Thought that Caelus would trust him, would understand, would take his instincts in stride and with pride. Let go of himself fully—horns out, teeth out, dark side of himself out—and dove down, bit down, straight into the pulse ( into the soul ) of his neck. Took and gave every part of himself to Caelus; took and gave every part of Caelus for himself.

The next morning, he was all alone in the bed—horns in, teeth in, dark side of himself in—with nothing but a letter by his side. A letter he would not read for a week, grieving over the foolishness of himself. When he thought he was safe and accepted, once again, his trust was thrown into the ground, left to abandon like a box of uncared-for puppies.

When he opened the letter finally, Dan Heng’s heart squeezed once more. For the man he had mated to, given his heart and single mating bite to, given his trust and body and solidarity to, that oh-so-unusual man he had fallen in oh-so-deep love with—

The man he loved was an Emanator of Destruction.

How many years had it been since he opened that letter from Caelus? Only the next day had he joined the Astral Express on their journey across the universe. To this day, he felt the subtle tug of the frayed connection between the two of them (the melancholy result of his foolish actions) as he continued starward.

How many years had it been since he last thought of the unusual man Caelus? After Dan Heng bit into him, that night, dreams and nightmares mixed together like a dollop of chocolate syrup in milk. The only thing he remembered by the end was the harsh gaze of golden molten eyes—a gaze, he later realized, as the gaze of Nanook himself.

How many years had it been since he last even examined the bond between him and the Emanator of Destruction Caelus? Destruction flowed in his veins, buried deep down within him, settling alongside his Imbibitor Lunae form in a darkness even more empty than the emptiness of space itself.

…How many years has it been since Dan Heng allowed himself to love ?

When Stelle, March, and Mr. Yang stepped onto the Luofu, Dan Heng felt anxiety settle in his gut. His worry for his companions was powerful, but his own will—his fear, his paranoia, his broken trust —held out for a while.

Until it didn’t.

He needed to leave, go and find his friends, help them with the Stellaron plaguing what may’ve been considered his homeworld. The banishment decree was nothing in the face of the life of his friends.

His dark past, however, was very much something. He had let his trust be thrown away twice now—would the third time be the charm?

(Despite it all, despite his tears and anger and destruction and hunt, there was one thing that he could not deny.

His love for Caelus had never left.)

[Dan Heng]

I need your help. <

I need to go back onto the Xianzhou Luofu. I don’t have good memories of this place. <

Please. I need you by my side. <

[Caelus]

> ?????

> You still have my number??

[Dan Heng]

I’ll answer all your questions once I do what I need to do. <

But please, Caelus. I can’t do this alone. <

[Caelus]

> …

> I’ll be there.

The waters had finally settled. The battle with Phantylia was over, the Lord Ravager having been defeated in her efforts to plague the Luofu with Abundance. Dan Heng stood in the dust, his Imbibitor Lunae form revealed to his closest companions. The threat of destruction gave Dan Heng time to avoid the eventual aftermath, but now he no longer had that excuse.

But him being the reincarnation of the Vidyadhara High Elder wasn’t the only strange thing today.

“You’re a Lord Ravager too!” March screeched, her bow aimed straight at him. Caelus only laughed nervously, holding his hands up.

“Dan Heng?” The unusual man— no, his mate looked over to him pleadingly. “A little help, please?”

Dan Heng sighed. “March, he’s not a threat. Not to you, anyways.”

March gave him a critical eye, but lowered her bow slowly. Fu Xuan and Stelle both looked at Dan Heng inquisitively before the former sighed.

“Well, I won’t question your choices, Dan Heng. …Even if I do think that mating a Lord Ravager is a terrible idea.”

“HE’S WHAT TO A WHAT?!” March screeched; Dan Heng winced. Not how he wanted that to come out. He’d forgotten that those who lived on the Xianzhou ships were much more susceptible to the scent changes that a Vidyadhara undergoes after mating. Especially considering that the Express had only met him after he’d mated with Caelus.

Stelle’s eyes lit up. “Is that why you’re walking on the Path of Destruction now?”

Dan Heng thought for a moment. He’d forgotten that the girl could sense such things—his Destruction had mingled with his Vidyadharan form, it seemed. “I suppose so.” He said slowly.

“Well, regardless, it’ll be a while before the General is in any shape to talk to you all.” Fu Xuan cut in, hands on her hips. “All of you are free to look around for a bit until the General is well enough to do so.”

“Thank you.” Mr. Yang nodded his head. Caelus looked at Dan Heng; the dragon nodded.

It was time to tell his mate everything.

“So… you’re the Vidyadhara High Elder?” Caelus leaned against the wall of a nondescript building.

“And you’re an Emanator of Destruction.” Dan Heng commented. The two of them had situated themselves in an alleyway in Aurum Alley, near yet away from the hustle and bustle of the Luofu.

Caelus glanced away, a pained expression painting his face. Dan Heng sighed. “…I’m sorry. For never telling you about my past.”

“I mean,” Caelus shrugged, “I didn’t want to tell you either, so it was a fair deal.”

Dan Heng hummed in reply. Caelus took a deep breath before meeting Dan Heng’s eyes.

“I’m sorry. For leaving after that night. I betrayed your trust, and abandoned you even after accepting being your mate. I just… after that night, I felt guilty. That you’d connected yourself to an Emanator of Destruction—a Lord Ravager. I wanted to be open with you, but I didn’t want you to…”

“…to leave you?” Dan Heng finished quietly. Caelus looked down. “Answer me one thing, Caelus: were you… trying to string me along?”

“At first, maybe.” Caelus breathed; Dan Heng’s heart squeezed uncomfortably. “I saw something you’d hidden deep within yourself—your Vidyadharan form, I know now. I wanted to… drag it out, so I hung around you. But as time passed, my feelings changed. I don’t know where and how, but I can promise you that when I first kissed you, I was definitely infatuated with you.”

Silence hung over the two of them for a moment or two before Dan Heng let his heart fully show for the first time in a while; a soft smile graced his lips and his gaze warmed.

“Thank you. For coming.” He murmured. Caelus blinked before mirroring him. The Emanator approached him, then pulled him into a tight hug.

“I’m glad that I haven’t lost your trust, my dragon.” He whispered. Dan Heng buried his head into the crook of Caelus’s neck.

Returning to the Express party was… a little awkward. To reveal himself as the reincarnation of the accursed High Elder was one thing. To be mated to a Lord Ravager on top of that?

“I cannot be- lieve you!” March scolded him. “You mated to a Lord Ravager! A leader of the Antimatter Legion! I thought you were the braincell between the two of us!”

“To be fair, the first thing Dan Heng did upon waking up in the Underground on Jarlio-IV was immediately throwing himself into battle, so he doesn’t always have the braincell.” Stelle chimed in. Dan Heng shrunk further into his rising shoulders, wishing that he could just throw himself into the sea.

“You’re not helping , Stelle.” He hissed out. From beside him, he could feel Caelus struggling not to burst out laughing at his misery; for good measure, he leveled a glare with his mate in response. Some things never change, eh?

“In Dan Heng’s defense,” Caelus said once he wasn’t going to break down laughing if he opened his mouth, “I didn’t exactly tell him I was a Lord Ravager until after we’d mated.”

“Yeah, but Dan Heng could’ve told us!” March huffed.

“Why would I do that?” Caelus and Dan Heng both said, before Dan Heng continued: “You don’t need to know about my love life, March. No offense.”

“Of course I do, Dan Heng, I’m your— WAIT. ” March cut herself off, eyes wide. She pointed an accusatory finger at Dan Heng. “You lied to me back then!”

“Back when?” The entire Express—including Caelus—asked.

“When I asked you for love advice!” March exclaimed. “You said you’d never been in love!”

Dan Heng facepalmed. Surely, his best friend isn’t this oblivious, is she? He mentally screamed. Himeko— thankfully —came to his rescue.

“March, if he told you the truth, he would’ve been in this exact situation: you grilling him for details.” The red-haired navigator said, an amused smile on her face. March’s own face exploded into a bright blush.

“I— uh— well—” She stammered. Stelle sighed before putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Please stop digging your own grave, March.”

“Are you sure the others won't be uncomfortable with me on the Express?” Caelus asked, already seated on Dan Heng’s bed (which was resembling more of a nest the more blankets and pillows the dragon hoarded; suspiciously, this coincided with Caelus’s return) and in a spare pair of pajamas the conductor had provided him.

“As much as March huffs and puffs about you being an Emanator of Destruction, I think everyone is willing to trust me on this.” Dan Heng rolled his eyes, finishing up an entry on yet another book Stelle swiped. Seriously, how did she get away with this? Dan Heng turned to Caelus, his eyes warm. “After all, if I didn’t trust you, why would I have asked you to come back?”

Caelus blinked, then huffed with a smile. He flopped back onto the nest bed, pulling out his phone and beginning to play something on it. Once Dan Heng joined him, flicking the lights off, he tucked his phone away and rolled over, wrapping an arm around Dan Heng.

“I’m glad you’re back.” Dan Heng murmured, shoving his face into the crook of his mate’s neck. The burnt wood and metallic scent hadn’t changed in the slightest save for the hints of sea foam, a whiff Dan Heng had only caught for those brief moments after mating and falling into slumber.

Caelus was warm against him. Dan Heng just figured it was the Emanator thing. Caelus’s chest rumbled with the hum he let out. A soft peck on his forehead had Dan Heng smiling, closing his eyes.

“I’m glad to be back.” Caelus whispered.

[yumecel]

the slowest death 💙

yandere!dabi/reader | 1.6k

summary: you didn’t even think the PLF would bother tracking you down. one member proves you wrong

character specifics: slightly ooc for fic purposes i suppose

reader specifics: gn reader

world specifics: probably a far longer gap from dabis video to the war arc than is canon? sorry for any inaccuracies of living under the PLF i wasnt paying attention

tws: stalking, mention of murder via burning, dabi being a creep

a/n: christening this blog with the man thats been driving me wild recently. im so rusty! please forgive me

——💙——

i promise i’m 18+, i promise i’m okay with seeing dark content, i know this will haunt me in the world to come should i lie [yes⬇️] [no↩️]

You can’t stop seeing him.

Skulking into street corners, under flickering lamps, your peripheral vision, all permeated with the silhouette of a man you only expect to see on screens. When you close your eyes, he persists as an afterimage. Blue eyes burn into yours.

You’ve been having trouble sleeping.

Sometimes you lock yourself in your bathroom to watch that video of him, Dabi- now confirmed as Touya Todoroki. You drag your laptop with you and you search up information about him, trying to keep track of his current movements to confirm your suspicions. It feels like there’s eyes everywhere. It feels like he’s everywhere.

It’s not like you haven’t seen him up close before. You think that’s why this is probably happening. Months prior, under the direction of the Paranormal Liberation Front, you’d used your quirk on him- you’d cupped his cheek gently and allowed the soothing water to roll over it, clearing away a minor burn that was nothing compared to the rest of his scars. You remember it vividly because he closed his eyes. That’s not the issue, many people do, but you almost couldn’t believe the expression of tranquility that crossed his face. On the screens, in leaked footage, Dabi often presents himself with a chilling calmness or a maniacal grin. The total relaxation of his features and the removal of defences was foreign. And when it happened, you’d observed closely. Every piercing, every staple, every mark. You just happen to like observing the effects of your quirk on other people, and Dabi was no exception. When it was over, he’d murmured something barely discernible as a “thanks” and walked off. You thought his back would be the last you’d see of him in person, save for a few brief appearances with other PLF members. But he kept coming back to you, minor burn after minor burn, cut, scrape, bruise. He hardly ever talked, but he was so bold. He laid his head in your lap and there was an unspoken understanding that taking advantage of this vulnerability would result in dire consequences for you. Dabi always ensured his absolute privacy before settling down, and you believe you became something of a refuge for him. But you didn’t think there was anything special about you save for convenience, and you certainly had more “regulars” than just him. Dabi didn’t appear to be particularly attached to you as a person so much as your quirk.

Your clientele eventually died, perhaps literally, perhaps they just stopped coming after finding another healer, leaving only Dabi asking for your services. To make money and a future, you had to move, and you did so quickly and without fanfare. You were planning to leave that chapter of your life behind entirely.

But Dabi keeps haunting you.

You think you’re wrong. You should be wrong. You don’t know if you’re wrong.

It’s true that you’re technically on the run from the PLF, but you didn’t believe they would be particularly keen to expend effort on tracking you down. You are after all, only a healer, and have no specific abilities to boost other quirks. Quirks that soothe others can be found everywhere and you doubt they’d struggle tracking down more like them, and there’s already an abundance of regular doctors at their fingertips. Your ability to both soothe and heal is something that can be replaced easily enough.

Put simply, the costs of capturing you far outweigh the costs of letting you run free. The PLF knows they manage secrecy fairly well. They have nothing to worry about.

So when Dabi started lurking around the edges of your vision, you thought-

“They’re going to make an example of me.”

That could be the only reason. Being killed by Dabi is complete overkill. Your quirk may involve water but you don’t stand a chance against quelling his flames. There would be no epic fight, and you’re fully aware that engaging with him would lead to your death within five minutes. That’s if he grants you the mercy of a quick death. There’s nothing holding him back from prolonging your suffering for hours, even days. You shudder every time you think about it, a million ways he could kill you flashing before your eyes.

He doesn’t kill you quite yet. He’s toying with you.

The inside of your shabby apartment starts looking substantially shabbier. He must be letting himself in regularly. Somehow, somehow he has obtained a key, and now he’s snooping around. You accept that death awaits… for the first week, at least. Perhaps he’ll find you have nothing of interest to the PLF and leave. All you do is keep living as normal, praying some great distraction for him will arise and this will pass. Every day, you show up to work- a small, urban spa where you’re free to offer your services of pain relief under the guise of massage, never disclosing openly that you’re using your quirk. It’s custom to do so if you don’t want to draw attention to yourself, but clients generally know through word-of-mouth that quirks are used. The additional layer of protection was meant to shield you from the PLF, but it all seems useless now.

You can hear your phone buzz as you massage a client’s back. You try to pretend it never happened, and she seems undisturbed. You wonder what it could be, since after clearing your phone very few people have your new contact details. You manage to check it once the client shuffles out the door, thanking you airily.

It’s an email. The subject matter reads, “Hi Sweetheart!”

Spam.

But you still open it.

——————

Subject: Hi Sweetheart!

I really couldn’t resist digging around your laptop today. Imagine how flattered I felt when I saw all your previous searches had to do with me. Curious, are we? I can just imagine your scared little face as you scroll through videos of me, wondering when you’ll see me again. I guess what I found cute is that you have my confession video bookmarked. Did you save it for… personal reasons? You had plenty of time to look at me without a shirt on when you were working. I guess you can’t get enough of me.

But I can’t act like I wouldn’t do the same if you were someone I could just look up online- but I’m a good researcher without the internet. I tracked you down without a lot of effort. And I’ve been learning so much about you recently. So much that I’ve reached a dead end. There are things I need to know about you that wouldn’t be found on your laptop or in your apartment…

Maybe I’ll see you when you get home.

You know who I am.

——————

Feeling sick to your stomach, you scroll up, thumb trembling.

It’s sent from your own email address.

——💙——

You don’t have anywhere to go but your apartment, yet returning to it feels like such a stupid move. The police, let alone pro heroes, hardly go to that part of town. You stay an hour longer at the spa. You hope this will throw off Dabi, allowing you to dive in, grab your stuff, and equip yourself to leave forever. The passiveness that came with being a sitting duck has left your body. Confronted with death, you know it’s time to fight for survival.

Your phone buzzes again.

Another email.

——————

Subject: I won’t hurt you

You think I don’t know where you work? I can just as easily come to you and torch the place. I’m willing to play nice, so don’t insist on being difficult.

——————

A coworker remarks that you look sickly and insists you go home. You nod slowly, not saying much as you start to get ready to leave. When you stumble out of the door, the bell above you sounds like it’s ringing several rooms away. Nothing feels real.

Buzz.

——————

Subject: You can email me too

You know that right?

Still holing yourself up in that spa? Need me to walk you home? Coming home?

——————

You send one to yourself.

——————

Subject: Im on my way

[No body text]

——————

Buzz.

——————

Subject: Good.

[No body text]

——————

——💙——

You don’t bother putting your keys in the door. It opens regardless. With a dry mouth, you swallow, looking around and taking tentative steps further into your apartment.

He deliberately approaches from behind, which you were expecting, but you still yelp out when his warm presence meets your back, arms wrapping around you.

“No ‘Honey, I’m home’?” He snickers. You don’t struggle. You freeze, breath caught in your throat. When he holds you a little tighter, it’s like he pushes you over the edge.

“I’m sorry,” You begin. “I can come back. Are you going to kill me? Please don’t kill me. I can tell you anything you need. I don’t know what I can offer you, if, if you want to stay here, I can-“

He squeezes tighter, making a gentle shushing sound. Your body starts to feel like dead weight. You look down, eyeing the scars on his hands and counting staples in an attempt to ground yourself back in reality.

“It’s not about leaving the PLF, doll. Y’understand?”

You nod frantically, shoulders raising, even if you don’t fully understand. He loosens his hold on you on a little, before coming so close to your ear that you can feel his hot breath.

“It’s about leaving me.”

“Leaving you?” You say, voice barely managing to come out.

“You think I wouldn’t miss my favourite healer?” He croons.

“I…” You begin. “… everyone left. I couldn’t make money and I didn’t have prospects.”

“You’re welcome,” He says, inhaling slightly. “I took care of everyone else.”

“That’s…”

Ominous.

“But you just had to leave, right? Before I snapped you up for myself permanently? Before I got to know you better?”

“I’m- I’m not-“

“Shh, doll. I don’t want those hands on anyone but me from now on. Start packing your necessities and get ready to come home.”

He releases you, causing you to fall to your knees with a dull thud. You were at the mercy of the man behind you.

This, you realised, was the slowest death you could die.

[skepticdoe]

HI HELLO I REALLY LIKE YOUR BLOG AND I WANNA START INTERACTING MORE CUZ THATS FUN

Anyways a small prompt (if you so desire), Ftm Kyle/ mtf Marj/genderqueer Kenny headcannons GO !!

HIIII ANON!!

you’re so lovely 😭 im glad you like my blog!!!

If it’s headcanons you seek, then it is headcanons you shall receive :)

Mtf Marj

- i feel like her first sign of transition would be because of this one time during one of her regular visits to the hello kitty store (which she still visits as a teen/adult because you KNOW she’ll be spending all her adult money on Sanrio merch) she wanders into the clothing merch aisle and stumbles upon this really cute skirt. One of those really nice old ladies (who are too kind for this world I swear) catches her looking longingly at the skirt and urges her to try it on. She realised how much she loves it and soon it goes from Butters to Marjorine and she’s now a regular Sanrio dress collector and her and the old woman are now besties <3

- she confides in Kenny pre transition about her gender questioning and he encourages her to explore it. He’s actually the first person to see her in a skirt

- she’s OBSESSED with cutesy hair clips and it gets to a point where if one of her friends see adorable hair accessories they know she’ll like, they’ll most likely get them for her. It’s the same with any cutesy accessories, actually. (Ooo look at those hair clips, Marj would love em!)

- when she does come out, most of the negativity she faces comes from her parents. They keep her isolated at home and only allow her out to study or to go get groceries. They survey her even more until she ‘snaps out of her phase’ (which never happens and she moves out as soon as she can when she turns 18. She would struggle with cutting all contact; it’s something she works through in the future). Kenny and the other three still help break her out without her parents noticing. Kenjorine have their first few dates through secret night meetings

-she loves to visit pride parades when she’s older with her friends, it’s a yearly tradition. She loves meeting younger trans people and reassuring them that they WILL see the light at the end of the tunnel and to embrace who they are!!

Ftm Kyle

- Kyle transitions relatively young, like in his preteens (11-12 or so?) and only Stan, Kenny and Cartman knew about it from the start.

- I tend to headcanon Gerald as an emotionally absent father. Sheila, being the ‘woke’ politically involved mother, helps her son transition. They both have their flaws and they tend to resort to not talking about Kyle during family reunions, which also leads Ike to become ‘the golden child’ (I love ike by the way this is not a dig at him 😭). Gerald always loves to passive aggressively remind him that him deciding to transition is going to make him lose a lot of opportunities in life and that it’s not ‘too late’ to reconsider. They get better about it when Kyle grows older.

- Kyle never used to talk about his transition because of the negative way his family talk about it. It never really comes until they hit teen age where gossip and drama is at its peak and people find anything to spread as gossip and Kyle’s transgender identity becomes a hot topic for a while. It’s a tough time for him but Kyle being the outspoken person he is, quickly ends the wildfire with his words (and sometimes fists in Cartmans case)

- his extended family still don’t really support his transition and tend to make backhanded comments. When people meet his grandma, she’s like “meet my granddaughter****!” And you see a full grown man walk in and say “don’t mind her, she’s a bit senile. Old people, am I right? I’m Kyle.” :)

-kyle and Marj become really close during her transition and he started to become one of the first people she goes to for advice and help. He definitely supported her a lot during the start of her transition and he tends to join her to go to pride parades in solidarity, even if he’s not as comfortable putting his identity on display

-even though Kyle is confident and outspoken, he does have his vulnerable moments where he needs to vent and spill all his bottled up worries (Stan is the one he calls and holds close during these moments). It also really affects his dating life and he was really hesitant to start trying to see people. He got Stan in the end though :))

Genderqueer Kenny

-his first look into the genderqueer world was when he was sorting through Karen’s clothes. (His first look into trying on different clothes is with princess kenny, but he didn’t really think that deeply about it at this time). He’s really hesitant to throw anything out (understandably because of his living situation) and he discovered one of Karen’s skirts that was a gift from one of her friends that was a few sizes too big. He wore it and loved it and starts to wear it around the house

-his parents and his friends don’t really care (they’ve met princess kenny before lmfao) and Karen LOVES playing dress up with her older brother. He starts to wear the dresses and skirts out in public (because it means more clothes for him, duh) and when people question his gender, it’s always a shrug followed by a “I don’t give two fucks on what I am. I dress how I want and feel how I want. We only live once anyways, dude.” If you press harder and you’re closer to them, you’ll probably get a deeper answer about how they tend to not feel permanent in their gender identity, similar to how they never feel permanent in life (their immortality)

- dude just chills and tries on skirts with Marj

- he goes by whatever pronouns and his style changes literally every other day (greasy masculine vibes to a feminine, still slightly greasy vibes) don’t let this guy free in a thrift

- Kenny’s willingness to wear anything literally helps Karen kickstart her fashion career in the future lmaoo

THIS TURNED OUT SO LONG BUT I PUT MY ALL AND TONS OF EFFORT IN!! I hope you like it anon!!! feel free to send me another ask literally whenever and THANK YOU FOR INTERACTING <3

[newfeeling77]

my least favorite urge as a mentally ill individual is the “making people see im struggling” urge… like when i would cut myself that was in fact 90% of the reason… ik its not narcissism and the reason i think it is well thats the illness itself talking. but why do i feel like everyone needs to see and know when im going through extreme pain. ive gotten a lot better at this over the years, just from natural emotional maturation and intervening from close friends who had to tell me please stop telling me you’re going to kill yourself once a week its a bit stressful… anyway i suppose thats normal we’re social creatures and for some of us suffering in silence is not an option… unfortunately im also very vain n caught up in making sure i look good every day so even at my most depressed and burnt out i cant let myself go out in sweatpants and greasy hair. but sometimes i WANT to bc i dont want anyone to get the impression i have it easy. its a combination of wanting to compete in the suffering olympics even though i know ive got the gold already and like, i guess i get insecure abt my lack of productivity and progress (which is unfounded because i get praise in nearly every aspect of my life from my school and work performance down to just surviving this long) and i feel like i need some kind of justification i guess… like oh thats why she messed up that one thing one time, bc shes fucking insane and extremely depressed. and tired. and i have no money. or maybe it’s because im just really scared of the fact that im genuinely mentally unwell and i will be forever, like i can be doing well n smiling but i still have compulsions and bad behaviors and suffer from depression regardless of how my life is going… and i worry that in the future as i get more established and live a real adult life with a career i wont be able to like, just stew in my bullshit anymore. like i wont have TIME to be in crisis. but sometimes i just want to grab an authority figure in my life by the shoulders n say listen to me i think about committing suicide nearly every night and i have for over a decade. n then we dont talk about it

[boarloved-art]

the mdzs british gameshow au resides in my heart so firmly recently, its so dire, so heres some throwaway headcanons i have abt it bc i fear i shall go insane 😌😌😌 under the cut bc im insane and rambled far too much 😆😆😆

-jgy is still evil purely bc its Hilarious. everythings a normal Modern British Au Where Most Of Them Work In Daytime Television but jgys still evil? flawless. but only kinda evil! his whole "i have been overlooked my entire life bc of my low status and now i long for the ability to prove every1 wrong" thing still stands. except instead of murdering people and condoning experimentation on live humans, its now just ruining peoples careers so he can get a promotion. loser.

- 3zun messy love triangle REAL TO ME! walk with me as i describe the following. jgy starts his working life as an assistant for the nie's Sunshot Campaign band, him and mingjue get kinda close theres some homoerotic tension that never gets worked out, mingjue then starts dating xichen. nielan break up for unknown reasons, then jgy swoops in and starts dating xichen. theyre engaged now, wow theyre so in love shoutout xiyao. except. nmj and lxc still very in love, everyone seems aware of this Except NieLan themselves. all of them have feelings for eachother, None of them are normal about it.

- Huaisang has been live tweeting this entire 3zun saga to his mutuals. hes based a fanfic on it. wangji has tried to subliminally message xichen about the concept of polyamory (aka watching documentaries while xichens home), in the hopes that maybe just maybe they'll realise that theres a very real answer to all of them liking eachother, except its just resulting in xichen thinking that wangjis polyamorous. wangji withers a little bit when hes hit with the "if this is who u are thats okay you can tell me <3" talk from xichen. the brotherly equivalent of how he felt in canon about "so you like mianmian, right?!"

- huaisangs a real renaissance man, noone knows what he Does. it seems to be everything and nothing at all. hes an art student (maybe? whos to say? mingjue called his uni to ask about him and they said they didnt have a student called nie huaisang.), hes the Sunshot social media manager (definitely. they didnt even Have social media before him which is Insane), sometimes he does their album art, wuxian Thinks huaisang works at a B&Q ? once again , hes Seen huaisang in the uniform & working at a till but any questions to the actual shop turn up stares of confusion and "we dont have an employee called huaisang..?", huaisang may or may not be the owner of the popbase twitter account, he writes fanfic but refuses to divulge what fandom its for. the only detail anyone knows is that it's one of the most bookmarked fics in his fandom. huaisang has so many random connections and skills that wuxian genuinely thinks that Maybe hes an immortal but most of the skills are So specific and Mostly Useless that he Doesnt Want to believe it.

- jiang yanli and jin zixuan ALIVE, raising their BEAUTIFUL SON JIN LING, with the help of his MANY UNCLES! wuxian and jiang cheng, upon learning that not only is their sisters boyfriend rich, but his Brothers Engaged To The Host Of The Chase, are horrified to think that they might be Nepotism Chase Contestants. jin zixuan doesnt know what being a Nepotism Chase Contestant would even imply but they bring it up so often that hes considered a handwritten apology because they seem genuinely distressed (they arent. theyre fucking with him. but he doesnt need to know that.)

-the jiang family are Baffling in family photos. madame yu is very elegant and cool, fengmian has clearly had his outfit selected by madame yu, jiang yanli is v soft and pretty, wei wuxian is an emo, and jiang cheng is a bloke who goes around in footie tshirts 99% of the time. you can tell when yu ziyuan has styled them because wuxians hair is lacking any volume, completely flat and slicked, and in a LOW pony so you cant see it in photos, and both boys are stood there in shirts and trousers like theyre off to a wedding. wuxians biggest relief about being disowned was that he'll never suffer hairgel again.

- the wens have been living with their grandma, an uncle, a Nebulous Baby Relative and a wei wuxian. wuxian latches onto them so fast. as is par for the course with wuxian & the wens. he loves that baby. a-yuan starts calling him dad one day and noone can tell him no, so now he just kinda Is. ayuan sucks up Wuxians Little Shit Energy far too easily and now hes Factually The Funniest Kid In The World. he calls wuxian broke once and wuxians entire brain rebooted a bit. my real life nephew did this to me multiple times.

- ayuan luuuuurves game shows and quizzes, wen qing & wuxian working on one Fixes this child. hes enamoured. he needs to watch his daily Chase-Pointless-Catchphrase-Tipping Point rotation or he cant sleep.

- wangxian are EMBARRASSING!!!! anytime they see eachother its Unstoppable Force (wuxian trying to hint that hes bisexual and single) vs Immovable Object (wangji being CERTAIN that wuxian has no interest in him). wangjis a PATHETIC little man for this northern emo, he hides it well and keeps up his Sensible & Emotionless thing, but his thoughts are like a sopping wet kitten. he thinks hes handling this crush sooooo normally and then wuxian posts a selfie on instagram and wangjis opening google to search Wedding Ring Shops Near Me as if thats a proportionate response to a selfie. wuxian isnt any better. wangji likes his instagram story and wuxian cheers out loud, to which the only response is a loud sigh from wen qings room.

- for wuxians first episode of pointless, he does a celebrity episode so he can pick all his faves and have them bring whoever they want along with them. he was not expecting lan wangji but oh god is he thankful for xichen in this moment. the second he sees wangji also at xichens podium, he decides that xichen is now his second- sorry, third- sorry fourth favourite person. A-yuan, Yanli & Wangji are joint first. when hes chatting with the contestants about their lives, an OBSCENE amount of his time talking with wangji is poorly disguised flirting. twitter tears him to SHREDS for how desperate he clearly is. huaisang is also here but hes not mingjues teammate, hes a random radio hosts teammate. another enigma for wuxian to add to his huaisang conspiracy board.

- wuxian has a rotating cast of cohosts on pointless until wangji applies for the job, at which point wuxian becomes sure that god is real and that wuxian is gods favourite. much like every other time theyve been near eachother, their first episode together is mostly poorly disguised flirting and soppy eye contact. huaisang has now based a fanfic off this.

-Sunshot Campaign 5 album is never happening and wuxian needs to move on but he CANT! he craves that album. he doesnt CARE if mingjue is a top gear host or something now! he doesnt CARE about mingjues self help book, or his home renovation show! If he wanted to stan someone with side hustles, he'd stan huaisang, damnit! he abuses his Huaisangs Best Friend privileges to ask when an albums on its way and everytime he is told "im pretty sure da-ge sold his drumset 5 years ago ngl"

[thehauntingshadows-if]

Oh, I just sent an ask but I actually forgot I wanted to ask you something else too.

We know how Loren feels about MC's marriage, but in your answer to my other ask you said that they resent Anika only if MC romances them.

I'd be interested in knowing what each non-romanced RO (player never picked romance options with them and so on) thinks about any given RO that was chosen by MC. Like for example, in my case, C is my chosen RO. So what would unromanced Loren, Anika and Jasper think about the relationship between MC and C? I hope it makes sense!

And on a side note, how's the relationship between Anika and C to begin with? I've realized we don't really know about that specifically, as C's intro feels like it mostly refers to how their family look at them at large, not necessarily how Anika herself feels.

Sorry, I'm really going feral over C here - I just need more haha

dont apologize for being feral over C. im happy to see it🤭. Now I've got to try to answer this in the least confusing way possible lmao.

This got long so the rest of it is under the cut

Loren:

Unromanced Anika honestly is pretty happy about this one once she gets over the disappointment of not being able to marry Mc. She's always liked knowing that mc and loren have someone who is forever in their corner even if she feels a little left out sometimes, and now that she knows that theyre like together together she can't help but be excited for them.

Unromanced Jasper doesn't really have an opinion, but he's glad to see that Mc is happy. He knew that mc and loren were together before, so its not like things really changed for him when they stayed together. Life just carries on as normal for him tbh

Unromanced C also doesn't care too much. Once they get over the initial shock of mc and anika no longer getting married, they're back to being pretty neutral. They are, however, somewhat happy anika isn't being forced into an arranged marriage. Even if she was okay with it, they weren't.

Jasper:

Unromanced Loren is honestly just completely shocked. They truly never thought that something would happen between mc and jasper just with how much of a wall jasper tried to build between them. Loren would be a little hurt in any route, but they'd be most okay with Jasper ending up with mc. They know he will always do his best to make them happy, and at the end of the day thats all they care about.

Unromanced Anika also really enjoys mc ending up with jasper. The whole thing sounds like it came right out of a book, and she can't help but love every second of it. Anika also just really likes Jasper and is so happy for mc to end up with someone who cares about them so much. (jasper and anika bestfriendism is alive and real to me)

Unromanced C honestly wouldn't know what to think. Part of them can't help but think of how inappropriate the whole thing is, but they do their best to not think that way. They also dont know Jasper too well, but if mcs happy, who are they to try and change anything

C

Unromanced Anika would be so shocked she genuinely wouldn't know what to say. She wouldn't be angry or anything like that. It's just that she never imagined that Mc would end with her sibling of all people. Once she sees how much Mc and C are able to help and support each other tho she's fully their number one supporter and will do everything she can to convince her parents not to interfere.

Unromanced Loren... isn't a very big fan of C. Its not even jealously or anything like that they just think C is pretentious and would much rather mc end up with someone like jasper or anika. Over time, they'll warm up to C, but they're definitely that person who'd tell Mc to break up with them over the smallest disagreements (they're petty LMAO).

Unromanced Jasper would be a little worried. Hes heard rumors about C and some of the things they've done, so he already has some issues with Mc getting close with them. He'll still be there to support mc and their decisions, but he also won't be afraid to tell mc his thoughts if they ask him. Once jasper gets to know C better, he'll be fine with their relationship, but its definitely going to take a while

Anika:

Like i said, Loren does hold some resentment towards Anika, but unromanced loren learns to get over it relatively quickly. Once they're able to rekindle their friendship with her, loren is pretty supportive of the relationship. They know that she'd never hurt mc, and thats all they care about. Also, the fact that Anika and mc live down the street from them is something they'd be pretty happy about

Unromanced Jasper is pretty supportive, especially once Anika manages to befriend him. He enjoys watching how happy anika and mc are with each other. Hes not the happiest that this means they'll have to stay in London, but he'll learn to be okay with it, lmao

Unromanced C is incredibly relieved. From the moment they heard about the arrangement, they were very worried that Anika was going to be trapped in a cold and unloving marriage, so finding out its actually the exact opposite makes them very happy. All they want is their little sister to be happy<3

As for Anikas and Cs relationship, I'd say they're pretty distant. In a lot of ways, they're similar to mc and Flora but less awkward. The distance between the two isn't from any sense of abandonment like it is with mc and Flora and more from C purposefully distancing themselves to try and reduce the bad image they cast on anika and their family🙃