#the way ive reread this ask like 13 times and im still not sure i answered it correctly

[thehauntingshadows-if]

Oh, I just sent an ask but I actually forgot I wanted to ask you something else too.

We know how Loren feels about MC's marriage, but in your answer to my other ask you said that they resent Anika only if MC romances them.

I'd be interested in knowing what each non-romanced RO (player never picked romance options with them and so on) thinks about any given RO that was chosen by MC. Like for example, in my case, C is my chosen RO. So what would unromanced Loren, Anika and Jasper think about the relationship between MC and C? I hope it makes sense!

And on a side note, how's the relationship between Anika and C to begin with? I've realized we don't really know about that specifically, as C's intro feels like it mostly refers to how their family look at them at large, not necessarily how Anika herself feels.

Sorry, I'm really going feral over C here - I just need more haha

dont apologize for being feral over C. im happy to see it🤭. Now I've got to try to answer this in the least confusing way possible lmao.

This got long so the rest of it is under the cut

Loren:

Unromanced Anika honestly is pretty happy about this one once she gets over the disappointment of not being able to marry Mc. She's always liked knowing that mc and loren have someone who is forever in their corner even if she feels a little left out sometimes, and now that she knows that theyre like together together she can't help but be excited for them.

Unromanced Jasper doesn't really have an opinion, but he's glad to see that Mc is happy. He knew that mc and loren were together before, so its not like things really changed for him when they stayed together. Life just carries on as normal for him tbh

Unromanced C also doesn't care too much. Once they get over the initial shock of mc and anika no longer getting married, they're back to being pretty neutral. They are, however, somewhat happy anika isn't being forced into an arranged marriage. Even if she was okay with it, they weren't.

Jasper:

Unromanced Loren is honestly just completely shocked. They truly never thought that something would happen between mc and jasper just with how much of a wall jasper tried to build between them. Loren would be a little hurt in any route, but they'd be most okay with Jasper ending up with mc. They know he will always do his best to make them happy, and at the end of the day thats all they care about.

Unromanced Anika also really enjoys mc ending up with jasper. The whole thing sounds like it came right out of a book, and she can't help but love every second of it. Anika also just really likes Jasper and is so happy for mc to end up with someone who cares about them so much. (jasper and anika bestfriendism is alive and real to me)

Unromanced C honestly wouldn't know what to think. Part of them can't help but think of how inappropriate the whole thing is, but they do their best to not think that way. They also dont know Jasper too well, but if mcs happy, who are they to try and change anything

C

Unromanced Anika would be so shocked she genuinely wouldn't know what to say. She wouldn't be angry or anything like that. It's just that she never imagined that Mc would end with her sibling of all people. Once she sees how much Mc and C are able to help and support each other tho she's fully their number one supporter and will do everything she can to convince her parents not to interfere.

Unromanced Loren... isn't a very big fan of C. Its not even jealously or anything like that they just think C is pretentious and would much rather mc end up with someone like jasper or anika. Over time, they'll warm up to C, but they're definitely that person who'd tell Mc to break up with them over the smallest disagreements (they're petty LMAO).

Unromanced Jasper would be a little worried. Hes heard rumors about C and some of the things they've done, so he already has some issues with Mc getting close with them. He'll still be there to support mc and their decisions, but he also won't be afraid to tell mc his thoughts if they ask him. Once jasper gets to know C better, he'll be fine with their relationship, but its definitely going to take a while

Anika:

Like i said, Loren does hold some resentment towards Anika, but unromanced loren learns to get over it relatively quickly. Once they're able to rekindle their friendship with her, loren is pretty supportive of the relationship. They know that she'd never hurt mc, and thats all they care about. Also, the fact that Anika and mc live down the street from them is something they'd be pretty happy about

Unromanced Jasper is pretty supportive, especially once Anika manages to befriend him. He enjoys watching how happy anika and mc are with each other. Hes not the happiest that this means they'll have to stay in London, but he'll learn to be okay with it, lmao

Unromanced C is incredibly relieved. From the moment they heard about the arrangement, they were very worried that Anika was going to be trapped in a cold and unloving marriage, so finding out its actually the exact opposite makes them very happy. All they want is their little sister to be happy<3

As for Anikas and Cs relationship, I'd say they're pretty distant. In a lot of ways, they're similar to mc and Flora but less awkward. The distance between the two isn't from any sense of abandonment like it is with mc and Flora and more from C purposefully distancing themselves to try and reduce the bad image they cast on anika and their family🙃

[mightbewriting]

i, sincerely, have no idea how to start this ask.

i read ‘wait & hope’ sometime at the beginning of this year and it came to be one of my favorites. i could talk endlessly about it. then i found that ‘beginning & end’ existed and i couldn’t read it.

i refused to read it. why?

because i knew it would hurt. because, even though i didn’t get to see their life before, i know how inexplicably in love draco was with hermione, and i knew it would hurt.

reading ‘beginning & end’ with knowing whispering in the back of my mind, knowing how this would go, knowing that every choice, every memory would be forgotten by her, hurt so much. because look at how happy they are! how much they had to fight for!

and it poses the question of ‘wait & hope’, was it all for nothing?

no! absolutely fucking not! love, despite memory, dedication, despite hurt, is everything. and because i simply refuse to believe that! i may be a pessimist but first and foremost i am a hopeless fucking romantic.

so, i guess i came here to say:

fuck you.

fuck you for making me cry the hardest i have ever cried at a series of words. harder than ‘the song of achilles’, harder than when i read ‘the fault in our stars’ when i was 13 (and if you knew me when i was 13–holy shit—you know how much a deal this is. i was inconsolable for a month.) fuck you for being graced with the talent to write in the way that you do. for granting life to stories that should be told because as much as it is fiction, it’s real. real possibilities and everyday struggles (masked by magic and circumstance but real, nonetheless).

more than fuck you, more than having to muffle my utterly embarrassing bouts of sobbing, (no, not crying. sobbing so damn hard i had to clutch my chest like a regency era damsel), more than that,

thank you.

for your writing, for your time, for your story.

you’ve ruined my life and given me one of my favorite works, in any form, in every form.

- venus 🕊

(also, i plan on reading wait & hope again after experiencing their before. the mental, and physical, distress i am going to experience will be worth it but i will still be simultaneously furious at and in awe of you.)

(also, not sincerely ‘fuck you.’ i realize i’m abrasive and we have literally never spoken but i truly am in love with your words. no matter how distraught they make me!)

hi. wow. venus. hi. wow. hello.

im kind of speechless? am i delighted to have made you cry like a regency era damsel? should i apologize? am i honored? pretty sure its a weird soup made of all that and more.

im so, so, SO please that you decided to give b&e a shot! i think a lot of people avoid it because of exactly what you described (re: *pain*) (and also bc it seems like a lot of folks think it's just a w&h retelling from draco's pov and therefore also expect *pain*; its a prequel people, PREQUEL lol) (and it's very long) (and its a much different story genre and pacing than w&h) (and im definitely not self conscious about it at all idk why you'd think that) and its hard to like...convince people to subject themselves to that? xD i think im gathering that it was worth it lol, and im really, really happy to hear that. thank you so much for taking the time to come scream at me about it; this has literally made my morning! <33

is there a better compliment than an emphatic 'fuck you'? i really dont think so. it might be my favorite thing ever. so thank you!

ive also heard from many reliable sources that the w&h reread after b&e is...difficult. do you do discord? if you need emotional support, i know some places you can get it lol (mostly in the form of commiserating and sobbing gifs) xD

thank you again, seriously, for reading my work and taking the time to share something of your experience with me! this has been such a delight to find in my inbox this morning <3

[kimnjss]

[ he stands you up ] requested.

@taestannie​: super angsty anniversary weekend where he stands you up.

@houseofarmanto​: forgetting your anniversary.

warnings: there are none?? 

A/N: requests for reactions are now open and without commissions. if you want to send a reaction request in, simply send me an ask!

NAMJOON

It's been six months since you started your relationship with Namjoon and despite his  busy schedule he promised, a million times promised, that he would be able to meet with you for dinner to celebrate the special day. Any other day, any other time, you'd not get your hopes up because you knew how unpredictable his schedule was even if it was premade and solidified. Things came up and you understood that.

But, after seeing the look on his face, hearing the sureness in his voice when he made his promise, you decided that you would trust it and wait up for him. You put on a nice dress, did your hair and makeup prettily and waited for him to come pick you up, a large smile on your face.

As the hours ticked by, your smile seemed to fade and your patience began to wither. An hour, you could understand with him being late. If you remembered correctly, he had a busy day ahead of him so an hour late was expected. But four hours!? Four whole hours and not a single phone call?

To say you were livid would be an understatement. With a huff, you were kicking your heels from your feet, and trudging up the stairs to take all of this gunk off of your face and go to bed. Night completely ruined.

As you were wiping at your eyeliner, your phone lit up beside you. The smiling picture of you and Namjoon doing it's job in annoying you as a message from his truly popped up onto the screen.

[23:19] ♡ joonie ♡ : OHMYGOD!? BABY. im sooo fucking sorry, i forgot. im not even going to act like i didn't, because i really forgot.

[23:21] ♡ joonie ♡ : and don't take this to think ur not important to me, bc ur the most important thing to me... i just got caught up in the studio.

[23:26] ♡ joonie ♡ : im running home now, ready to make it up to u. please don't be mad!!

Setting your phone down, you shook your head, turning your attention back to your reflection in the mirror. You knew he meant his apologies and that he wasn't lying when he said that you were important to him.

If only this had just been the first time he forgot about you.

JIN

A hundred days together was a big deal. To you and Jin. He had woke you up this morning with the biggest of smiles ready to tell you exactly what today was, as if you'd forget. Like most days, Jin had to work, and of course you didn't mind. You were looking forward to when he'd come home.

There was no way he hadn't planned something fun for the two of you to do tonight and you couldn't wait to figure out what it was. Jin liked to keep things interesting when it came to your relationship, always surprising you and willing to spice things up.

Even after one hundred days, you could genuinely say that there has never been a bored moment between the two of you. Whether he was making you laugh with his corny jokes or if you were teaching each other new recipes, there was always something for you to do. Something fun that you could enjoy together.

Throughout the entire day, you couldn't help but think up what something special would he have planned for you two. Ideas changing the later in the day it got. The romantic walk where the two of you watched the sunset being crossed off as the sunset and he was nowhere in sight.

Briefly, you contemplated sending him a text, but didn't want to be annoying or overbearing. Surely, he didn't forget, right? He was just running late. Probably caught up at practice or in the studio or something? Jin was a busy guy, you understood that much, all you had to do was wait and when he came home the two of you would be able to do something fun together.

That was what you kept telling yourself as you watched the time change on the clock, until it's past midnight and the front door is slamming shut. Okay, stargazing was always fun! Especially if you got creative and brought blankets out into the backyard.

Without a word, Jin was entering the room. He offered you a small smile before kicking his shoes off of his feet. You watched as he stripped his jeans from his body, tossing his shirt away in the corner before sinking onto the bed. “I'm beat. Will you turn out the light when you're finished?”

He spoke on a yawn, eyes falling closed as he slowly began to drift to sleep.

YOONGI

[ 09:57 ] to- yoonfi ✩: you won't be busy all day, right?

[ 10:13 ] yoonfi ✩: nope, not all day. y?

[ 10:13 ] to- yoonfi ✩ : come home early! ive a surprise for you!!

To say your boyfriend was a hard worker would be the understatement of the century. Long hours spent in the studio, producing track after track, refusing to eat until he got the hook just right. He was so hard on himself, but with good reason, the boy was a genius when it came to making music.

The same could be said for his first mixtape, AgustD. You could perfectly remember the smile on his face when he let you listen to the completed version, the way it grew when it finally dropped and his fans loved it more than he had thought.

That was four years ago. Exactly. He had changed so much in the past four years, grown in so many ways and you were so proud of him. Which was why you were more than willing to spoil him on the four year anniversary of his mixtape.

Blessed that he didn't have a busy day, even though he told you that he didn't, you made sure to check with the others. Your boyfriend had the tendency to forget when there was something pending on their schedule.

According to them, though, he was free as a bird and you were ready to take advantage of the free time you'd have as soon as he finished his meeting this afternoon.

A little while after he left for work, you went out and bought an array of ingredients to prepare his favorite meal. Paired with his favorite brand of wine, you couldn't wait to see that smile of his once he walked through the door and caught whiff of what you made.

The food wasn't it, though. You also had splurged and bought him those speakers he had been eyeing for the past few weeks. Figured you'd surprise him with the gift after dinner, when he was relaxed in front of the TV just after you offered to give his back the massage it greatly deserved.

Then, of course, he'd be overwhelmed with happiness and here comes the wild monkey sex you'd have on the couch, and on the stairs, and on the bedroom floor, mapping out every inch of the room until you were falling onto the bed. Or something like that.

You had been so caught up in your plan and making sure that the food was just right, that it took you a moment to realize how late it had gotten. Way past the time Yoongi was supposed to be home.

With furrowed brows, you lifted your phone to dial him. His drawl of a 'hello' tickling your eyes after the third ring. “I thought you'd be home early?” You wondered after he moved to a quieter room to hear you better.

“I'm sorry, baby. I should've called. The meeting sucked so me and Joon have to come up with something new. It'll be all night, but I'll see you in the morning. Alright?” What were you to say? He had to work. Mumbling your agreement, you let the line go dead before plopping at the kitchen table.

HOSEOK

You had thought that Hoseok flying in on the same day of your anniversary would be cutting it close. It was a 14 hour flight, there was no way he'd land in time to make the plans that you had stupidly planned and you didn't really want him to. He'd be so exhausted after flying and you were sure that all he'd want to do would be to get some rest.

But it was your three year anniversary and he wanted to celebrate, insisted that he wouldn't be too tired to spend time with you and marveled about how the only thing he wanted after a long flight was to be with you.

So, per his request, you were slipping into the silky dress he had sent over. Allowing his stylist to come and do your hair and makeup, again, per his request.  

Despite the fact that he wanted to keep where he was taking you a secret, you were able to convince him that it would be better if the two of you just met there in hopes to save time. He, reluctantly, agreed which was why you were seated alone in the restaurant he had so graciously rented out for the two of you.

Scanning over the menu over and over again, reading and rereading every word hoping to pass time. He should be here by now, right? Hobi was clear when he thought you that he'd be landing a little bit after eight and he had planned to come straight here from the airport. It was now 10, so what gives?

Lifting your phone, you frown at the message that you had somehow missed while studying the menu.

[ 21:22 ] hoseokie: princess!! our connecting flight was delayed. i won't be able to makee it :( sooo sorry, ill see you when i get back!

Your standing from your seat before you can read the end of the message, annoyed and overall disappointed. If only he had listened to you when you said over and over again that he wouldn't be able to make it.

At least the restaurant was empty, definitely saved you from looking as stupid as you felt in front of a room full of strangers.

JIMIN

Six o'clock. He had repeated it countless times before leaving the house so where was he now that it was six o'clock? He knew how important this day was to you, how important it should be to him. So where was he?

Was it too much to ask to be with your boyfriend on the anniversary of the day you met? He had said he would be here, so why wasn't he sitting next to you on the stupid park bench, enjoying the picnic you had prepared?

You had met Jimin exactly a year ago today. Could still remember the smile that took over his features when he spotted you seated on this very park bench, exasperation tinting your cheeks as you leaned back in attempt to catch your breath.

He had plopped down beside you without a second thought, a lame joke falling from his lips one he used in hopes to cheer you up. It had worked, you had laughed and instantly fell for the large smile that seemed to light up his entire face.

The two of you had been inseparable since that day, falling in love with each other slowly as the days went by until he was asking you to move in with him five months into your relationship. You said yes, of course and these past months settled and together had been... not what you were expecting.

A nice place for the two of you to live meant that Jimin needed to become a bit more serious about his work and no matter how great of a dancer he was, the craft didn't really call for a steady check. Which was why you encouraged, not pushed, him to get a regular 9-5 that would benefit the both of you in the end.

That's what people in serious blooming relationships did. Started making plans for the future, preparing to take care of each other. And in no way, did you expect him to quit dancing – just dial it back a bit so you wouldn't go bankrupt.

Either way, you regretted the decision of both of you needing steady jobs because lately it was like the two of you had become ships in the night. Hardly seeing each other for more than an hour with your opposite hours. But tonight, he promised, assured you that he would make it and be able to make up all the time the two of you had lost.

You were excited, got dressed up, yet he was nowhere to be found. After a full hour of waiting or him, you were effectively annoyed and ready to pack up and leave. Just as you stood, your phone buzzed in your purse.

Setting your belongings back onto the bench with a huff, you're reaching into your purse and pulling out your phone. Jimin's name lighting up on the screen, only worsening your mood. Did he really wait a whole hour to text you that he wasn't going to be able to make it? Of course he'd miss it, it was obvious now after an hour.

[19:07] jiminie!: i know u must be pissed nd im sooo sorry.

[19:08] jiminie!: i came home early nd wanted to take a little nap, but overslept. [19:10] jimine!: come home, i've prepared something nice for us.

No matter how mad you wanted to be, how mad you knew you should be, you really couldn't bring yourself to be. The boy was tired and you loved him, asked this of him so the least you could do was be a little bit understanding.

TAEHYUNG

The scowl doesn't leave your face not once the entire day. While you're cleaning up the house, while you're fixing lunch, while you're binge watching your favorite TV show. Pursed lips, raised brows and clenched teeth. You've been a foul mood all day and you had one person to thank for that.

The same person who rolled over half sleep nearly crushing you to death, but you didn't say anything because you loved him and loved being in his arms no matter the fact that you couldn't breathe underneath his weight. The same person that sprung up this morning, not a word about the meaning of today, just a grumbled: “Could you get breakfast ready?” As he pulled himself from he bed to go shower.

The same person that forgot your fucking anniversary and didn't even bat an eye when you brought up the date in hopes hearing the numbers would some how jot his memory. It didn't. What it did do, though, was remind him of the various things he had scheduled today with his little friends. Barely stopped to kiss you as he rushed out the door.

So your foul mood was his fault and you were planning to give him the cold shoulder until you were satisfied with the groveling he'd pull from being ignored. If there was one thing Taehyung hated was being ignored, you knew that more than anyone. One thing that you hated? When your so called boyfriend forgot the day that marked the start of your relationship.

You figured ignoring him would be fair.

Now, there was no way you didn't understand that Taehyung was a busy guy. He was always in and out of the house and so adamant about putting his all into his work and you admired that about him. You just never thought it would be some type of tug of war when it came to spending time with him. Especially on days as important as this one.

Punching the pause button on the remote, you reached to grab your phone cutting it's vibrating dance short as you read the message that had appeared on the screen.

[ 17:11 ] joon: happy anniversary. sorry we're stealing ur boyfriend :( what did he do this morning, though?

Ah, Namjoon their ever so considerate leader. Not a surprise that he'd be more attentive than your actual boyfriend on this day. How could someone, who was not even inside your relationship, wish you happy anniversary before your own man!?

[ 17:13 ] to joon: he forgot.

Tossing the phone beside you, the scowl on your face deepens as you glare at the characters on the screen. Stupid idiots, kissing and cooing as if their whole love story wasn't about to go to shit within the second act. How unfair. Taehyung would love bad mouthing shitty romcoms, but you had to be mad at him because he was a little shit.

Not even five minutes after the message sent to Namjoon was your phone dinging, Taehyung's specialized name lighting up your screen. Pfft, did he really need his friend to remind him of the day? How pathetic.

[ 17:17 ] boyfriend!!: baby!! oooh my god, im sooo... u know this isn't like me, i don't know what to say. we're in a radio interview now, but im rushing home right when it's over. pls, don't be upset. i mean i know ur upset, but lets at least try to salvage what left of the day we have. please. im soo sorry.

You thought, for a moment that you could be petty in this moment. Type back some snarky reply that you knew would make him feel some type of way. You just... didn't have the energy. Being forgotten about sucked, hurt in an odd way that you couldn't really explain.

Taehyung was a great boyfriend, but it was starting to get a little old the way he had your relationship on the back burner of his life. He was either with you, or not. Something's gotta give.

JUNGKOOK

You knew from the moment the words left Namjoon's lips, your boyfriend wasn't going to find true peace ever again. Let alone be able to rest properly. Producer. Which brought on a new array of responsibilities that Jungkook to very seriously, as he should.

Much like your meticulous boyfriend, everything had to be absolutely perfect and anything short of that wasn't worth presenting. That exact mentality was the reason why he spent so many long hours in the studio, at dance practice. Going over and redoing each note, each step, until he was satisfied or until he was being dragged out.

It was more often the latter because this boy was never satisfied no matter how great everything he did ended up looking, sounding. He still strives to be the best, better than the best. So it was no surprise that you were seeing him much less when his new title was being announced.

Producer Jungkook. It was safe to say that he was stressed. Not to mention that he still had to keep up with choreography, singing, interviews and being the youngest of the biggest boy band in the world.

You understood that, so you didn't blame he when he was too tired to fool around. Didn't make a fuss when dinner plans had to be canceled. Agreed when he asked you to watch him, help him figure out what he was missing. You were always there for him when he needed you.

So it was completely fair that you'd get a little pissed when you asked the same for him and he didn't deliver. It wasn't like you were requesting something bizarre or out of the ordinary, honestly, you just wanted him to be home early to spend a few hours together for your anniversary.

Three months wasn't long, not that much of a milestone, but it was still exciting and you wanted to be with him. Especially since he's been like a ghost these past few weeks. Was it too much to ask that he was home for just one night? Just one night where he was Jeon Jungkook of BTS, but just your regular boyfriend.

His apology came two hours after he was supposed to show up. A short message explaining that he wouldn't be able to make it. Like you couldn't of guessed that. Still, you waited, his favorite show cued up and ready. The incoming message had you flicking the TV off with a huff, trudging up the stairs with a prominent pout of your lips.

The pout didn't lift from your lips the rest of the night and pretty soon you were slipping underneath the sheets, lip jutted. He missed dinner fine, five o'clock was a little early to ask someone to leave work. But was he really not even going to make the effort to get in before you had fallen asleep?

Guess not.

It wasn't until after one did you feel the bed shift, a tentative arm wrapping around your waist as a heavy breath left his lips. But you were in no mood to be cuddled, especially not by him. Fully awake and alert now, you were shoving his hand from your body, scooting away from him.

“Come on, baby. Please. Today's been so shitty, I just want to hold you.” You could hear the sadness in his voice. But what about you? Did he even consider that your day might have  been shitty too?

Forcing your eyes shut, you acted as if you had fallen back asleep. Back turned to him, because you could guess the sad look he had on his face. You couldn't bring yourself to turn around and give in, allowing yourself to be engulfed in him. Not tonight.

[mynameseri]

Let's hope tumblr is working better today! Aw yay I'm there for them too and volunteering is so much fun! They are so welcome to eat the cookies! I encourage it. Awesome! Yeah it sucks when it's not adapted well. My sister likes tokyo ghoul, I was only able to watch the first season. Erigawa is canon! Yeah it does take awhile but he gets sad when he has to leave Jake and it's so cute! Hairless cats are so cute but have some health issues and need to wear sweaters in the winter. It's so cute1/?🌹

Hairless cats are so cool! And so are black cats! All cats are amazing and sweet. Aku will want to adopt out cat shelters. Seriously he tried but ended up making port mafia members adopt them. Literally ordered it. He's so adorable when he's focused. If anyone other than you or Gin mentions it he get's mad. He get's all embarassed but happy when you keep his work. When he fights Atushi he's bragging about how he has you as an amazing girlfriend. It's kinda you to hear him. Aww yes you and 2/? 🌹

Gin are amazing friends! Aku loves to come back from missions to see you two bonding and hanging out! Yes Gin so does gently tease him. He still asks her for advice when he gets confused though. His usual tactic is attack first think later. With you he would never intentionaly hurt you and gets so sad when he does. He loves you so so much and will make you smile whenever he can! Seriously hates mistakes. He might brood for a little bit but then he accepts it cos you said it was ok. 3/4 🌹

He has so many recordings of you and loves watching and listening to them! He gets worried if you don't respond and spams questions about you being okay for like 10 mins before sending a text apologizing for spam and that he'll let you work. He's so soft for you! And you have his Heart too! he just loves you so much. 4/4🌹

--

Replying under the cut 🥰🥰

Yess Meloldy and Kurapika adore your friendship with them! They appreciate everything you do for them! You bring so much light into their lives and vise versa. It’s an incredible friendship you have with them! You should watch the rest of TG it’s worth it even if it isn’t exactly on par with the manga! I love it so much and it’s still so so beautiful.

Awe I imagine Aku like begging my parents to let us take Jake to my city!! He wants us to keep Jake so badly since Jake is just the best cat ever. My parents would never let us keep Jake though because he’s 13 and they love him so much too! Poor Aku, but we will get our own kitty some day. Thankfully it doesn’t get too cold in the winter where I live so I think a hairless cat would do well, but I would still give it sweaters and blankets to keep them warm!!

Aku wants to adopt a cat sooo bad, but any time he loves a cat other Port Mafia members adopt it!!! Eventually we will get our own but who knows when that will be! It’s worth the wait though, they have to be as awesome and sweet as Jake which is so hard to find! Jakes one of a kind! Omg when Aku brags about me to Atsushi I just die. Aku is so so proud of me and it pushes me to work so hard to make sure he’s always prideful of me and my work. Atsushi definitely gets jealous, but he's glad to see Akutagawa has found a reason to live, so he doesn’t ever say anything mean about me!

Yesss I love the relationship I have with Gin we are so close!! She’s constantly telling me how much Aku loves me, as if he doesn’t say it enough. I adore the constant reassurance though, it’s definitely comforting and amazing.  Gin loves to give Aku relationship advice, always making sure everything is going well between the two of us.  He’s always trying to make me happy and smile and he always succeeds too. He’s so faithful and loyal, I couldn’t ask for more from him. He tries his best to be as open with me as possible and I appreciate it so much. He’s so sweet and cute, even if his general demeanor is mysterious and aloof. Im so lucky and grateful that he’s opened up to me and trusts me with everything! 

He’s honestly so obsessed with me, but in the best way. I love it. He’s always rereading our texts and screenshoting the cute things I say to read them later. He has my best selfie as his phone home screen, and a picture of us together as his lock screen. He always wants to be able to look at me. He even has an album in his phone of all the selfies ive sent him (even If theyre ugly) he loves them all! He’s just the absolute cutest. Im so happy to be in love with such a thoughtful and cute angel! 

[tiixij]

okay im being enabled hi putting it under a cut because its. so long hi i didnt go back to reread this after i finished typing it up. i really did spend like nine hours on this [dies . and its only the kids + one incident 😭

ALSO this is like inaccurate in some areas because ive done some more. developing or whatever yk but mostly its good so! yeah . hi :)

OKAY SO im gonna be dividing this up by the people but also each section doesnt contain. all the information about the person because it goes in chronological order for the most part so its really who the main focus of the section yeah okay anyways

DICK

as always, hes part of the circus with his parents and his older sister mary. while theyre preforming a little ways outside gotham, a group of people (more on them later) dressed up in masks break into the tent while the flying graysons are preforming, this then results in the death of dick's family, as well as several other members of the circus.

thanks to the location, it takes longer than usual for bruce(as batman ofc) to get over there and when he does arrive, most of the group has already dispersed. normally, he would have chased after them, but he gets there and he sees dick crying over the bodies of his family just like right in the middle of the tent and obviously this is gonna bring up like. a lot for him. bruce ends up talking to dick and even offers to take him in. initially, dick refuses. he wants to stay with the circus, which he does for a few weeks but it's really just kind of shambling along after that and dick has kind of thought that if he was at least still with other people he'd grown up around, it'd be easier but it ends up just being incredibly overwhelming.

bruce had left dick with his phone number, so he can call if he needs anything. dick had thought this was kind of weird at the time, because yeah that is pretty weird, but it's batman so 🤷‍♂️. when dick realizes that he cant stay at the circus anymore, he calls bruce, who then picks him up and reveals his identity to him.

after talking to dick that first time at the circus, bruce had found one of the masks outside. he recognized the mask as one that black mask's "in training" lackeys use (in training = they have yet to be approved to actually work for him because he's very very picky + paranoid and makes them prove themselves first).

so, after much consideration, bruce decides to tell dick that he knows the person behind the attack on the circus. dick is, of course, mad about this but believes that looking for revenge would do nothing. instead, he wants to help people so he asks bruce if he can help him with his whole vigilante thing. at first, bruce is reluctant to do it, but does end up agreeing to it because what dick wants is basically exactly what he wants. not to mention, dick is already in a much better place than bruce was at his age (in regards to his emotional state mostly(bruce has uhh some anger problems as a teenager), but also physically since dicks been an acrobat his entire life) but he insists on training him to make sure he's ready, especially since he has no idea how to fight.

dick is 13 when his family was killed, he doesn't debut as robin until hes 15 and at some point he does end up confronting black mask (more on that later).

BARBARA

so when babs was about a year old, her parents divorced and she went with her mom to nyc (specifically brooklyn, both she and her mother have accents ❤) while in nyc, she was on her school's softball team and did gymnastics pretty much her whole life through a local gym.

when she's 16, her mom is killed in a burglary gone wrong. she was home at the time and, at first, was pretty much frozen in fear and unsure of what to do. her mom being shot is what spurs her into action and she manages to knock out both burglars with one of her softball bats, she comes out of this mostly unscathed. after that, she has to move back to gotham to live with her dad.

babs ends up hearing about a lot of similar incidences, they seem to pop up all the time now and shes not quite sure if thats because shes in gotham now or if shes just more aware of it now. she decides that she wants to prevent what happened to her + and her mom (in the sense of babs having to see and deal with her mother dying and not the specific situation).

she ends up modelling her batgirl persona off of batman because she thinks that this will lend her seem more threatening if she has some sort of link to batman (though that kind of stops working when you get up close because her costume is originally made from a dark purple gymnastics leotard that she’s painted a black bat on to, goggles that go over a cut up beanie, a cape made from a black bedsheet, combat boots and yellow gloves, and its pretty obvious but she hits pretty hard with her bat so yk it balances out)

pretty much as soon as word about batgirl gets out, bruce approaches her to figure out what her deal is. when it becomes clear that she won't be stopping, bruce and dick start teaming up with her fairly frequently (though they don't know her identity and she doesn't know theirs, which i think adds some hilarity because at this point barbara and dick go to the same school and are pretty good friends and eventually they do start dating and they're both so focused on not letting their identities slip that they usually don't even notice when the other actually does say or something that could hint at it). bruce provides babs with an updated, much safer costume.

dick and babs both end up going to gotham city university and they both do on-campus housing. dick is trying not to rely on bruce, so he also has a part time job on top of being a full time student and being robin, so he ends up crashing and burning PRETTY BADLY, badly enough to actually fail a couple of classes, which is Not something he's used to. sometime in the middle of his second semester he decides to put being robin temporarily on hold.

babs, on the other hand, is also getting pretty overwhelmed by the combination of school + being batgirl but, as she always does, she pretends like it's fine and just keeps going! also worth mentioning that her roommate is tiffany fox, who shes met on occasion since her dad makes a lot of bruce's batman gear, but she doesn't know about that and she and babs don't really know each other. they don't end up being very close but they're both pretty good roommates and they don't bother each other so they decide to keep being roommates and get a campus apartment together.

JASON

so his home life isnt great. his dad's really shitty and while his mom is genuinely nice and loving, shes not in any condition to actually take care of him for a variety of reasons. these reasons also prevent her from working + jason's dad comes and goes a lot, also for a variety of reasons that jason himself doesn't really know all the time, so from a young age jason has to steal to either get food or money.

he briefly meets batman when hes 15, hes attempting to steal the tires off the batmobile and bruce catches him, then gives him some advice (that is Not helpful at all) and some money (which is helpful).

about a year later, jason steals some part from this game/trap thing he finds and well, he gets caught and the guy hes stealing from is cluemaster who ive decided to make important for reasons that may or may not become obvious later. cluemaster goes after jason, but hes extremely good at hiding and running so he manages to get away fine.

a couple of weeks later, jason comes home to find his mom dead from an overdose (which is especially shocking because at this point she'd been sober for a couple of years). he doesnt stick around very long, just grabs all his things and leaves

so jason lives on the street for a while, until cluemaster (the guy holds grudges like so bad you could accidentally bump into him in a crowded area and ten years later hed put you in a saw trap) locates him and sends quite a few of the people who work for him to get him and take him to a game hed designed for him. jason does his best to fight them off but, well, there's a lot of them and by the time batman has shown up, he's been knocked unconscious, bound and slung over one of their shoulders.

bruce saves him, then asks why he was targeted. jason is unable to answer (which is a problem that pops up from time to time, specifically when he's extremely upset or embarrassed) but he's very clearly not in a good state and shouldn't just be left alone on the street so he plans to take him to the hospital, but jason is extremely opposed to the idea so, for lack of any better ideas, bruce takes him back to the batcave.

on the drive there, jason ends up passing out. bruce + alfred make sure he's alright and then bruce looks into who jason is and when he finds out that his mom is dead and his dad is in jail (something jason hadn't even known), he offers jason a place at wayne manor (also telling him his identity). jason accepts the offer and then asks what happened to robin since he's been notably missing for around half a year at this point and bruce tells him a little bit about dick.

jason asks if he can do what robin did, which doesn't really take bruce by surprised, but he asks why because from what little he knows of jason at this point he's a little suspicious about his reasons. what does surprise him is how sincere jason is when he tells him that he wants to help people. sure, he thinks it seems fun, but he's also a lot more selfless than he presents himself as.

bruce is a little wary, but figures that it's gone well enough with dick and he does already have experience with both fighting and stealth, though both of those skills could do with some improvement. like dick, bruce insists that they do training beforehand. unlike dick, it only takes a few months for jason to start acting as the new robin.

about a year and a half after that, jason and bruce confront cluemaster. they track him to an abandoned warehouse, though they both think that it might a trap. they end up being right about that, cluemaster is nowhere to be found except through the tvs he uses to taunt them. they get trapped in one of his games during which jason ends up picking up a puzzle box, then he and bruce end up narrowly escaping.

jason doesn't tell bruce about the puzzle box, but he does take it to babs (who he a) is friends with and b) knows the identity of, though she doesnt know his) just to make sure it won't blow up when he opens it or something. she says its fine to open, so he gets started on it solving it.

inside, he finds a taunting message about and a locket that jason's mom always wore that contains a picture of the two of them, which he hadn't even realized that had been missing. so jason now knows that cluemaster killed his mom and he decides to go out for revenge, entirely planning on killing him.

babs calls jason to see how hes getting along with the puzzle box and he literally tells her he's about to go hunt down and kill someone so she immediately gets dressed in her batgirl outfit and goes as fast as she can to intercept him and make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.

she finds him and doesn't try to stop him directly, because she knows this will just upset him and he'll definitely go off on his own and then she won't be able to find him! so she sticks with him and she does actually think that confronting cluemaster could be good for him (though she thinks that this is probably.. not the correct way to go about it 🧍‍♂️)

they find cluemaster, confront him and it goes terribly. like its absolutely disastrous – babs gets shot in the back and jason gets captured. babs sends out a distress signal to batman, but basically thinks that she's going to bleed out and die right there.

when bruce gets the call from barbara, he gets ready to go as quickly as he can. he also calls out for jason, but when he doesn't come is in too much a rush to wait for him so he goes ahead and leaves, telling alfred to tell jason where he's gone.

by the time he gets to barbara's locations, she's unconscious and not at all in good shape. he knows that this isn't a wound that he and alfred can deal with, so he knows that to be able to keep her identity secret from the public, he'll have to know who she is and take her in as herself and not as batgirl.

he's horrified to see that it's babs and removes the really identify marks (the cape, the belt, the gloves) and hopes that her doctors won't be paying attention to the rest of it. he rushes her to the hospital as fast as he can.

once babs is in the hands of the doctors, he notices that alfred has been trying to talk to him through the communicator in his cowl and answers. he tells him that jason is missing and that alfred found the puzzlebox, message and locket in his room.

bruce, on his way back to where he found babs, tells alfred what happened and to tell dick.

babs wakes up a few days later, now paralyzed from the waist down. she learns that bruce is batman, dick is the original robin and jason is the current robin. she then starts asking about jason, she knows that cluemaster had taken him, but surely he'd managed to get away or bruce had gotten him back – unfortunately, neither of those turns out to be true but bruce is looking for him. she learns this from dick because bruce is actually doing just that at the moment.

TIFFANY

so when barbara rushed out to meet jason she didn't really stop to cover any of her things, and it just so happens that this night tiffany's in need of a second opinion for a project she's working on she knocks on babs' door and opens it. there she sees an open box, inside of it are a variety of bat-themed tools, and on her still open computer she sees files and a messaging system that babs uses only to communicate with batman + robin.

tiffany decides to talk to babs as soon as she comes home because this is like a really big and cool thing she's hiding. she settles in to wait on babs' bed so she can't miss her return. she doesn't come home that night, of course. the next day, she considers texting babs but decides not to because she normally wouldn't bother.

she finds out that babs has been hospitalized from a gunshot the news, and goes to visit her. she's told that she's unconscious, so she decides to return in a few days instead.

tiffany isn't really one for subtlety so she basically goes into barbara's room says "hi, how are you? get well soon. i know you're batgirl." babs then tells her that she won't be able to be batgirl anymore and tiffany ends up suggesting that she could take that up.

before babs can really respond to that, bruce comes in and apologizes for interrupting and everything but then babs just goes "no don't worry about it, tiff was actually just asking to be batgirl 😇" and then bruce just like sighs and goes, "so i guess you know im batman..." and tiffany goes "YOU'RE BATMAN?"

anyways, bruce is pretty much entirely against the idea after what happened to jason and babs. he refuses to put anyone else in danger, he even argued with dick about him pretty much immediately going back to being robin but, while everyone else agrees that, yeah, it's dangerous, bruce also needs to help because he's spending the vast majority of his time searching for jason and cluemaster, and, while dick is back at the vigilantism, he is both a little rusty and can't spend as much time as he'd like on it because of school + his job. tiffany needs to go through some training, but she's already graduated and working at a place that doesn't require really any work outside of when she's working so she can spend more time out than dick can.

tiffany is then told that her dad's the one that makes like.. the Vast majority of the batgear and batsuits and she just.. he's what he's been doing what my dad WHAT

lucius isn't too happy with the idea of tiffany becoming batgirl either, but he is very much of the mind that she can make her own decisions, especially since shes an adult. he does get a little excessive with her outfit's safety features though

tiffany and babs end up becoming pretty close friends since babs is giving her advice and teaching her as much as she can. at the same time, babs is working on making a setup she can use as her new identity, oracle.

the search for jason stops a few months later, shortly after bruce finds three of his fingers and a lot of blood. he's assumed to be dead.

at some point, dick stops being robin in an attempt to get away from all the connotations that come with being robin (for instance, he's 24 and people are still calling him "boy wonder" and even though he mostly works on his own, he's still considered batman's sidekick). so dick becomes nightwing and also ends up moving to blüdhaven so he can get a chance to get away and kind of figure out who he is. he's having a little bit of a delayed identity crisis. he does still visit fairly frequently to see babs and has dinner with bruce and alfred about once a month. at this point, bruce + tiffany with help from babs and alfred are good enough to protect gotham

STEPHANIE

heres where things start getting a little vague. im still not quite sure exactly how old i want steph to be or how much time is between jason being taken by cluemaster + bruce taking her in.

anyways, stephanie is cluemaster's daughter. she doesn't see much of him and as such mostly has to fend for herself. she has pretty conflicting feels about her dad, like she thinks he's kinda fun and cooks well and he does spoil her a little bit when he's around but he's also never there and has a pretty short temper

when bruce, etc have to deal with cluemaster again, tiffany plants a tracker on him, which they're able to follow to his apartment. when they get there, they find that he's not there. they start looking for the tracker specifically, thinking that he might be hiding somewhere but instead of finding him in some hidden room, they find steph.

cluemaster had planted the tracker they put on him on steph, who, when told this, get extremely upset. she packs her things and makes it very clear that she's intending to just leave, even though she has nowhere else to go. tiffany then follows her, to make sure she gets somewhere safe while bruce goes back to trying to find cluemaster.

after walking for a while, steph very clearly gets exhausted from carrying her bags and just sits down on the sidewalk. after a while of this, tiffany walks up to her and asks her what she's doing and when stephanie admits that she has no idea, tiffany takes her back to her and babs' apartment.

once at the apartment, steph realizes that maybe she didn't actually want to leave, maybe this was a bad idea, maybe she didn't need to pack so many things! she can't decide if she regrets leaving or not but she's pretty sure it was a dumb idea.

she tells tiffany that actually she'll just go back home and tiffany goes umm.. no bad idea! dont do that! so she just kind of.. sits back on the couch while tiffany tries to figure out what to do. babs is visiting dick at the moment, so steph is given her bed for the night. while staying there, she learns about what her dad did to jason and babs by overhearing a conversation tiffany has with babs and then tiffany explains it to her.

soon after, steph moves into wayne manor. bruce is entirely expecting for her to ask to help him, but she never does. she asks a lot of questions about what he does and what he knows, but she actually has no interest in going out and doing any of that, which is a HUGE relief for pretty much everyone.

now theres a lot i could say about dicks reaction to steph, in fact i tried to but i kept ending up typing like Way too much and none of it was really quite right. i will say that he is ridiculously protective of her, he is dead set on making sure that nothing happens to her for a variety of reasons.

eventually, jason comes back to gotham. he doesn't make himself known right away and i'm not quite sure yet what his plan is but i do know that he's extremely angry at bruce specifically, but also just kind of that whole group. he'd been lead to believe that they hadn't even tried to look for him, that none of them trusted him and had been waiting for him to mess up like that, etc etc.

anyways his plan involves some somewhat lengthy preparation and in this time he actually ends up meeting steph because while she's out she sees him doing something that looks interesting and, because she's extremely curious, she just goes up to him like HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT LOOK INTERESTING CAN I HELP? and well, jason tries to scare her away but then shes there the next day and a few days after that and she keeps showing up until he's finally like ugh okay fine stay here i guess!

not sure what happens next like at all but jason does end up returning to wayne manor and trying to get himself to trust them again. it is very important to me that you know that it isnt until he starts getting settled into wayne manor again that he finds out who steph is and she finds out who he is. steph thinks its very funny and jason is just oh hold on wait what? WAIT A MINUTE!

jason doesn't go back to being robin. he does try to do some vigilante work but has to stop and try to live a normal life because doing that shit was Not at all good for him, so he gets his ged and goes to college because he doesn't really know what else to do and it's not like bruce can't afford it.

BLACK MASK AND POISON IVY

okay so this happens pretty early on, dicks about 18? okay so anyways this is only mostly just background information but i think its neat (some of this is copied from this post)

so ivy was always very interested in chemistry and botany, but decided to pursue chemistry because she figured it would give her better job opportunities and she kind of wanted to keep her plants as a sort of personal thing. by the time she graduated with her phd, she'd mostly lost interest in chemistry but it was too late for her to change her career path. she ended up working for the janus corporation, which was not at all her first choice but at this point she was just trying to get whatever job she could.

shes also always cared deeply about the environment, but while working at the janus corporation, she got so busy she was unable to do almost anything outside work and she became very disillusioned with the idea that she could ever do anything and that anything could ever change (in regards to the environment and her own life, she cant stop the janus corporation or any other from polluting even a little bit and she feels stuck in a life that she doesn't really want).

one day, theres an accident in her lab at the janus corporation, resulting in an explosion. she dies then, but the plants that she keeps there have been exposed to enough chemicals that they're then able to reach out to her and bring her back to life. she's much happier after this and kind of goes around the country doing ecoterrorism stuff yk shes destroying factories and stuff ❤

roman was put in charge of the nyc division of the janus corporation, which was all well and good for him. while there he established himself as black mask and kept his identity secret for years, partly due to his extremely paranoid nature. there's a whole process to being able to work for him and even his most trusted lackeys don't know his identity.

he also tends to have very flimsy explanations for why he targets the people he does, mostly he's just operating off of whims and small grudges. for instance, as mentioned previously, he sends a group of people trying to prove themselves to be let into his employ to kill a decent portion of the circus dick belongs to, the reasoning behind this, beyond it being a decent test of certain abilities, is that they had simply refused to advertise for the janus corporation.

eventually, roman begins to believe that his parents are planning to oust him from the company and possibly remove his access to the family money entirely. this is not an entirely unfounded worry as he doesn't exactly get along with them and similar things have been threatened before but a lot of it is also just him being paranoid. so how does he deal with this? he has them killed, so he's now the ceo of janus and working in gotham.

when asked about it, he claims that there's evidence that poison ivy is behind the deaths of his parents. he doesn't actually have any proof, of course, he just knows that she previously worked for them and tends to target companies that have similar business practices to the janus corporation's. most people believe this, but there's also a lot of people who notice that it absolutely isn't poison ivy's style to just kill the ceo and his wife and be done with it.

ivy catches wind of roman's claim and gets to gotham as quickly as she can from somewhere in california. she makes it very clear then that she did not kill the sionises but now that she's here she might just completely turn over gotham and turn it into just a nice big nature area.

im still not quite sure what happens next but i know that bruce and dick will have to confront black mask in all of this and, well, when dick sees black mask its like. "hmm this 'revenge won't solve anything' idea is not look so true right now. perhaps i was wrong. perhaps revenge is the answer." and then he goes a Little bit crazy and bruce has to restrain him and the next time they have to deal with black mask bruce tells him that Maybe he should stay behind for this one and dicks like yeah that seems like a good idea

but then! bruce ends up needing help so dick has to go in and okay hes pretty harsh on black mask then BUT he does leave it at apprehending + unmasking him (or maybe they already know that he's roman. <- things that need to be decided

would anyone be interested in hearing about the batman im constructing rn 👉👈

[morsenerboy]

An original story that has no title

Im sorry if y'all read this and catch a bunch of mistakes,, ive read over it a bunch of times for consistency errors and stuff of that sorts.

I also want to put out a trigger warning on this for ((SH, SH mention, ED mention)). Please let me know if theres more.

I slammed my foot into the brake pedal. My car skidded. It flippes a u turn and nearly flipped me into a ditch. Tears clouded my sight as i punched the steering wheel. The smell of burning rubber surrounded my car. I sat in the dust enveloped car until it settled down. I opened the door and stepped out into the dry desert air. I walked over to the boot. I popped the trunk and pulled out a blanket. I wrapped it around myself before leaning on my car. I looked up at the night sky. Thousands of little stars decorated the sky like holes in an inky black backdrop. I took a deep breath and got into the back of my car. I pulled out the simple airpump and air matress for a car seat and hooked them up. The air pump made a horrible ruckus whenever it ran. I just went back to stargazing. The back car door was still open as i reclined closer to the boot. I raked my fingers through my hair. I absently rubbed my fingertips over my scars. The many pink and white lines that decorated my forearm told stories. I liked to reread them over and over again until i felt hollow. But this time.. this time i just ghosted over the words, not reading the paragraphs but merely skimming over the pages. Words echoed around my head as pieces of the story splayed out in front of me. Chapters or sentances on repeat for hours. I checked on the filling mattress. It was near done. I closed my eyes, sleep deprivation finally setting in. I turned the pump off and closed the valve on the big sack of air in my back seat. I got in on top of it and closed the door. I locked all my windows and doors then layed down. I closed my eyes. I opened my eyes and saw the colors of the sunrise. I sighed and threw opened the door. I opened the valve on the bed and emptied it of its air. I shoved the pump and the mattress into the foot space of the back seat. I opened the trunk and rifled through my bag for new clothes. I found a t-shirt a few sizes too large and decided to keep my pants on. I pulled off my shirt and tugged on the new one. I slammed the boot closed and got back into the drivers seat. I turned my key in the ignition and pressed the gas. I needed to stop for gas, and soon. I began driving and found the main road again in a few mere moments. I obeyed the traffic laws as i rode up to a gas station. I got out and paid in cash to fill my tank. I grabbed breakfast. An energy drink and a half dozen of donuts. The worker manning the register looked at me odd. Maybe because I look pathetic. My dark brown curls trapped in a bun, inevitable dark circles around my eyes, trashy clothes and a silence that gave people chills. I looked at the guy with quiet grey eyes as i bought my stuff. My body felt sluggish as i walked back to my car. I put the donuts in the passenger seat and grabbed one. I cracked open the drink and downed half of it in one go. I carelessly shoved a donut down my throat. I went for another but stopped when i saw my scarred wrist. I snorted and got back into the seat. I pulled out of the station lot and drove off. Id likely never see this place again. I sighed. I reached over to the dial on my radio and turned it onto a classic rock station. Music filled the car and I relaxed into my seat. I sang along to the lyrics that i knew and played the beat on my steering wheel if i didnt know the song. This is how i was supposed to live. Free. Wings outstretched against the blinding sun. Everything i needed stuffed into my car. No one place for too long. Perfection. I drove into a new city. I opened my wallet and what i saw made me grimmace. Id have to stay in this place for a while to get some money back before taking to the road again. I found my way to a rv home rental place and parked in the lot. I opened my door and took a step out. I locked my doors with the keyfob. I walked into the run down rental office. I pulled my hair out of the bun and let it frame my face gently. I tucked a strand behind my ear before ringing a bell on the counter. A stocky woman walked up and eyed me.      “Whats the price?” I asked quietly. My voice sonded strange to myself. Like a mix of rough gravel road with a crushed velvet throw. The stocky woman looked me over.      “How old are you, kid?” She asked, leaning on the counter top and getting too close for comfort.      “Eighteen, ma'am. How much?” I said, standing my ground.      “For a kid like you itll be two hundred a month.” She said, standing back up. I pulled out my wallet. I fished out two hundred dollars and set it on the counter.      “Thank you, ma'am. Id like to rent.” I said, running my fingers over a cross-esque shaped scar spanning my left palm. The woman watched me as my fingers glided over the taut  skin and scar tissue. She watched me as i exposed my scarred forearm and rubbed the scars there as well. She did something on the computer that i had no interest in then grabbed a set of keys.      “Youre going to be renting number 113.” She handed me the keys. “Theres a map thatll tell you where to go. Ill stop by later tonight to see how youre working out here.” I wanted to tell her that wasnt necessary but bit my tongue. I thanked her and walked out. I got in my car and drove to the map. I studied it then drove away slowly. I found number 113 pretty easily. I pulled into the carport and got out. The majority of the people who lived here looked to be elderly. There were numerous younger kids though. The kids all looked to be around 13 to 19 years old. I sighed then made my way up to the door. I shoved the key in the door then turned it. I opened the screen then the main door. The interior of the place was surprisingly clean and comfortable despite the grungy outside appearance. I looked at the couch in the corner and gelt myself grow tired.  I laid down on the cushions and fell asleep all too fast. I heard a knock on the door and woke up groggily. I recounted what had happened and why on earth i had rented a place. I opened the door and the stocky office lady stood there with a few bags.      “May I come in?” She asked and i nodded silently. I held the doors open for her. The woman only came to stand as high as my collar bones, if that. She stepped in the little house.      “RVs 100 through 200 are for kids, like you. Either runaways or something else. I care for half of them. Ill take care of you too if you want me too.” I stared at the woman.      “Ma'am thats unneeded. I just need a place to get more money before I get back on the road.” I said quietly and took to examining my hands.      “What do you do? What are you planning to do to make money?”      “Ill think of something.” I muttered. My mind went to selling art. I had a little bit of art supplies shoved in my trunk. I could paint and sell the products. I could do commissions or–      “Whats your name?”      “I dont have one. Im restarting my life. I didnt want something tethering me to my old life.” I said, walking through a doorway to the kitchen. I looked it over then sat on the countertop. The woman walked in and set the bags on the counter beside me.      “Im Veronica.” She said. “I was a runaway when i was thirteen. I lived on the streets until  i was seventeen. Then i got a job and worked to afford a little rental like this.” She gestured to the little house. “I made it my goal to help others that are going through what i did. By the time i was twenty i co-owned this RV park. I was unofficially adopted and my adoptive mother helped me with buying this place. Now im close to fifty years old and i own this by myself.” I looked at her and she nodded to the bags. “I brought you food. You look pretty skinny under those baggy clothes.” Color flushed my cheeks. I nodded. I swalled hard and stared at the woman.      “Thank you, ma'am.”      “Ill let you get settled in. Dont be afraid to call for me.” She said before turning and walking away. I heard the door close and i closed my eyes. I got off the counterand looked in the bags. I saw sweets and smiled. I opened the container and pulled out a fat chocolate chip cookie. I bit into it and nearly melted. I finished the cookie and put everything in the fridge. I hardly ever ate. I wandered out of the kitchen and down the hallway. I found the bedroom and sat on the matress. It was more comfortable than the air mattress that was for sure. I laid down and fell asleep. I woke up as the sun shown in through the open blinds. I sat up and pulled the sides of my hair back into a ponytail. I walked trough the house and outside. I didn’t bother with putting shoes on. I walked over to my car and popped open the trunk. I grabbed the few canvases and my box of paint and brushes before closing the boot and shuffling groggily back inside. I set the canvases on the counter and grabbed a cookie. I set to work on getting a painting done. I was done before I even realized it. The yellow orange light of the setting sun shone in and painted the canvas with an aura of serenity. A smile turned up the corner of my lips up as i stared at a portrait of a woman. She had big, dark doe like eyes and pale skin, light blonde curls that reached to her sternum, and pale pink lips. It was the one woman i could paint with my eyes closed. I studied a photograph of her to the point of memorizing each detail of her pale, delicate face. My mother. Before I was surrendered to my uncle due to her incapability to raise me. My smile dissipated. I looked at the painting with its uncany resemblance to the woman in the photo. ‘Not my mother.’ I reminded myself. I scowled at the canvas and picked it up, taking it to the living room. I saw a few kids running around outside the trailer. Their laughs were muffled through the door but i could tell they were having fun. I peeked through the blinds and saw a few younger children and a few older ones playing basketball in the road. I smiled, remembering my days off where i would havg out with the neighbor kids. I stood and opened the front door. I let my hair down and shook my head. My hair fluffed then rested at my shoulders.      “I need a name.” I muttered as i pulled out a box of smokes. I put a cigarette between my lips and lit it with my zippo. I took a long drag as Veronica walked by. I blew the smoke out of the screen door. Veronica looked in my direction. She shook her head slightly as i brought the cigarette back up to my mouth.      “Excuse me, Veronica.” I called throuhh the door. She nodded in my direction and started making her way over.      “Smoking isnt good for your lungs, kiddo.” She said and i nodded.      “Yeah, im trying to shake the habit.” I put the lit butt out on the outer portion of my forearm.      “Oh my god, whyd you do that?” She asked, panic rising in her voice.      ‘Dont worry, Miss, it doesnt hurt too much.“ I paused. “I have a favor to ask of you.” She looked at me.      “Yeah?”      “I need a name. You got a name i could use?”      “Do you like Timothy? Or Jackson?” She suggested.

This story is unfinished and i might post an update if its wanted. In the mean time,, check out my instagram for art and more original characters. IG: @/ west_draws

[caprouletterenaissancecathe-blog]

RAHM PISTIS. A GENESIS. NOTES & REFERENCES

"You're Biggest Fear Will Be The Rescue Of You...Strange How It Turns Out That Way..." #SuchGreatHeights #ExemplarWisdom "Can You Show Me Dear, Something Im Not Seeing.." #Mirror #Truths #StayGold It Isnt By Mistake That I Used Incubus,& First Things First, I Tend To Rhyme But Often Times It Wont Be On Purpose. Especially Now That Im Starting This Process, Exposing My Thoughts. The Way I Express Myself-- In Pursuit Of Understanding, I Have To Sort Through My Complex To Find The Words In Me. I Originally Wanted To Type Conscious, But My History Corrected It. I Corrected Me. Truly. Though I Wasnt Wrong To Begin With. Both Words Represent & Convey What I Meant. So Either Way, Whichever One I Choosed, Would Have Still Been Right, So I Left It. Its Funny That Im My Own Suggestion. My Mistakes Are Poetic. Ive Learned Through Lessened. I Trust Myself Now, All Mistakes Are Meanted. Me, This..I Always Find The Answers To My Questions, Usually Pronounced As Parallell Double Meanings, Its The Only Way I Ever Find Comprehension. I Have To Play Ring Around The Rosies With My Mind's Logic, All The Mirrors, Reflections, Whats Reflected. I Travel Through The Maze In My Mind To Express It. The Realizations I Achieve Are Never Simple. I Dnt Know Why I Must Always Go Into Such Depth, Its Always Been Exhausting For Me To Express Myself. Decoding and Trying To Find The Purpose Of My Life. The Turmoil That Has Happens To Me. Or The Void I Host, & All Of Which Complexes Me. My Suggestion Was Perplexing. Equally. You Dnt Understand Now. But I Plan On Trying To Make Sense Of It. Often Times I Give Up On My Explanations, Or Leave Them Uncomplete Whenever I Know Someone Else's Eyes Will See. Im Exhausted Already, Because I Only Know How To Be Diffcult.I Focus On Everything, I Know Nothing, I Know Everything. Second Guesses. Double Meanings. And Sometimes When I Try To Describe It, I Tend To Repeat Myself, Or Sway Away From The Task Or The Point I Was Trying To Make, But I Promise It'll Come Full Circle. The Overwhelming Maze Of My Interpretations, Im Lost In It. Finding My Answers, Purpose, And Clarity Whenever I Was Alone Or Writing In My Diary. It Became A Portal, A Tool To Decipher The Realms In My Mind. But Why? Every Heading Starting Off As Dear You, Not Sure If I Was Talking To Myself, Him, Or Maybe To You. Dear You, Notes To Myself, Dear You, Im Contemplating Him.Sometimes Im Not Sure If Its Me Or You Im Talking To, Mostly You, But I Kept A Record For Me. I Plan To Illustrate My Discoveries. I Am Aware Of Myself After Spending Time In The Dark & In Search Of Seven...Thinking Back As I Recall That Mirror Of Time, I Used To Pray/ Beg/Ask God To Grant Me, Wisdom & Knowledge.I Was Only 13, Philosophy Allured Me. I'm Not Sure Why I Wanted To Gain Such Intellect. I Know Why, But This Is Already Gotten Out Of Hand. I Want To At Least Finish This, This Entry. Literally and Figuratively. Especially Before I Change My Mind. I Speak In Twos. A Dual Of Dualities, That Combat & Agree. Parallel, Not Intersecting. This Leads Into Another Mirror, Eventually. Initially This Passage Was Just Meant To Be A Intro, Just To Give You An Idea Of What I Plan To Reveal, What I Think. But I Go Into The Deep End, I Dnt Know Of Any Shallow Methods. Even When I Try To Myself Back. Its Uncontested, Uncontrolled. My History Leaves Me Suggestions. You Hold All The Answers Within You That You Seek. Your Calling, Constantly Calls You, Leaving Messages, Even When You Try To Ignore It, Just Wait Till It Finally Reaches You. As It Did Me. Im Not Sure If I Answered It, Or It Answered Me. I Think Both. I Know. Descartes. Socrates. I Wish It Was Easy, I Didnt Know What I Was Praying For All Those Years, In My Teens. I Mean I Did, But I Didn't. I Cant Ignore Details, I Find Purpose In The Nothing, There's Importance In My Parenthesis. I Prefer Being Unrevised. Its More Sincere. I Didnt Plan On Going This Far, Not Just Yet. I Keep Pausing,This Is Really Intimate To Me. My Philosophy. I Feel Scared. Ive Never Shared What I Will Now, I Will Try To Defeat This Feeling. I Want To Share What Ive Written To The World & I Want To Delete This. Its Already Too Much, And I Have A Headache. Never Easy, I Can Never Skip To The Point, Because These Declaration Cannot Be Briefed. Its Going To Be Alot Of Content. Using Metaphoric Context, Alternative References And Analogies To Better Throne Significances. Anything Less Denotes. All Of What Ive Written Will Collaborate In Conclusion. Eventually. Eventually. At First It Is Seemingly Nonsensical. But You'll Get It. It Madness. Sometimes The Truth Contradicts Itself. Either, Or, Can Mean The Same Thing, Both Terms Can Stand Alone, But Are Better Exemplified When/If You Understand The Double Meanings. Me Writing Just This; Makes Me Feel, Uncomfortable. It Feels Like A Risk. It Is. And I Already Regret It. You won't find closure in this entry, this an opening , im so happy that i sort of feel satisfied to stop here for now, i dnt want to go back and reread what i wrote though. Id feel foolish, i dnt think you'll get it. Plus im very impatient. Youll learn that too about me. and if i delete this ive wasted time. I feel drained now, lower case.