#and i hate the smell of onions almost as much as i hate the smell of pickles

[cakemagemaeve]

Oh, Prednisone my beloathed.

[psychedelic-ink]

𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐒

pairing: joel miller x webcam model!f!reader

genre: no outbreak AU, explicit smut (like very explicit), minors dni

word count: 7k

summary: you and joel continue to see one another, no matter the distance. And finally, you two breach the subject of "what are we".

warnings: joel is still bi in this, minor angst in the beginning, live stream sex, piv, messy titjob, dirty talk, possesive!joel, squirting, a hint of jealous joel, good girl/sir, praise kink

a/n: this work was commissioned by the lovely @trauma-dol 💜 thank you so much for commissioning me, I appreciate it lots!

part two of ravish

There are a lot of things you don’t like. The smell of roasted chickpeas, for instance. While others might find it inviting, it's just an odd scent that doesn't sit right with you. Then there's that annoying feeling of needing to pee right after you've gotten all cozy in bed. The list just goes on. You can think of a million things that annoy the heck out of you. 

However, waiting for someone that you’ve been eager to see for months to arrive at your doorstep might be the thing you hate the most. 

Worry bubbles up within you, and you can't help but sigh as you reach for the phone. Joel was supposed to arrive a good thirty minutes ago. 

Excited to see him, you had spent time chopping up an assortment of fresh vegetables – plump tomatoes, vibrant bell peppers sliced into perfect rings, and red onions thinly shaved and ready to caramelize into sweet perfection.

Besides the cutting board, a bowl of freshly shredded mozzarella cheese sits in fluffy mounds, ready to meld and melt into gooey goodness. Fragrant basil leaves are waiting to be scattered over the final creation. The pizza dough had been carefully prepped and now resting. 

But alas, there’s still no sign of him. 

“Dammit Joel, where are you?” 

You knew you should’ve just picked him up from the airport. You should’ve just ignored his protests and gone. New York is a big city; he could’ve gotten himself lost. Or worse, someone might’ve tried to kidnap him, rob him—sure, he’s a big man, but this is New York City.

It had been a hectic month. After you moved back from your family home, the issue of whether or not the relationship should continue had been a hot topic of sorts. For a while, you both decided to embrace the idea of "not putting a label" and simply being together during your visits. However, that proved to be too complicated. Losing yourselves in each other during every visit didn’t really allow for anyone else to come in between.

Not that you were complaining. You really liked Joel and didn’t really have any desire to date anyone else. Joel had enamored you completely. It was hard to keep it casual when all you wanted was him. But clearly, Joel didn’t want anything serious. He was content with how things were. 

The thought made your heart sink painfully in your chest. 

You tried to visit each other once a month, although most of the time it ended up being once every two months. He still joined your live streams. And when your viewers realized you were more than happy to indulge in JMiller’s requests, they started to get suspicious, commenting and teasing relentlessly. That meant you had to ignore him for a bit, which you hated doing. 

You did enjoy the punishments that followed though. 

A sudden buzz pulls you away from memory lane. Looking down you see a text from Joel, prompting your smile. 

Almost there, honey. You weren’t kidding about the traffic. 

“Dork,” you grin. Your head falls back against the back of the couch. You’ve missed him and now that he’ll be here soon makes you all giddy. Dormant butterflies erupt in your chest. Just the thought of him is enough to excite you. For an entire week, Joel Miller is yours. You had planned out everything. Not a minute will be wasted. Not on your watch. 

Twenty minutes later, there’s a knock on the door. You practically jump off the couch and run toward the sound. When you open it, you’re breathless, the tiny hairs at the back of your neck standing with attention. 

It’s him. 

He’s here. 

His eyes are tired, the crinkles you love to kiss deepening with his wide smile, “Hey there, sweetheart,” he says. “Miss me?” 

You jump towards him and wrap your arms around his neck. You hear the “oomf” that vibrates from his chest as you tug him impossibly close, forcing him to lean over you. Joel’s hands find the dip of your waist, squeezing tenderly, his nose bumps affectionally into the crook of your neck, and heat gathers under your skin. 

“God I missed you,” you say, voice trembling. Desperately you hold his face and bring him to your lips. His tongue traces the seam of your mouth, the movement dripping with a need for authority and control. You happily give it to him, opening wide. He sucks the air from your lungs and swallows your moans. Slick gathers between your legs, the fabric of your underwear clinging to your cunt and asking for the stretch of his cock. 

Joel guides the roll of your hips, chuckling darkly into your mouth when you desperately rub yourself against the denim. A shudder rolls up your spine. His cock firming under his jeans, “Honey,” he rasps. “Maybe we should close the door first?” 

“Why?” you say with a hitch of your breath. You drag your lips down his neck, nip at his racing pulse. “I know the neighbor wouldn’t mind. He watches my streams.” 

You’d said it without a second thought, which might’ve been a mistake on your part. His muscles grow rigid under your palms, the heat melting quickly like ice under the hot summer sun. “Is everything okay?” you ask, cupping his cheeks and forcing his gaze up. 

His gaze stays on you only for a moment before he drops his eyes to your lips. Your brows furrow at the reaction. His eyes are clear like a sky before a storm. Obviously, he has the question he wants to ask already locked and loaded but refusing to pull the trigger. He lifts his hands, the width of them blanketing yours as he pulls them down. 

“Just tired,” he sighs. He’s saved by the loud grumble of his stomach, the tension breaking. “And hungry,” he adds with a crooked smile. You force a smile and ignore the trembling of your bottom lip. Joel’s tone might be playful but it does little in calming your nerves. Moving away, the chill you feel on your skin is instant. 

“I prepared most of the ingredients,” you say. “I thought pizza and wine?” 

“We’re in the birthplace of the dollar pizza and you made it homemade?” 

You giggle at how comically wide his eyes are. “Well forgive me for not wanting to feed you the cheapest thing available,” Joel’s lips touch your temple, warmth blossoming where his mouth brushes against. “And I thought it would be fun.” 

“It will,” he murmurs. “I’m not used to bein’ pampered I guess. Only Sarah cares about what goes down my gullet.” 

“Hmm I don’t recall saying it was due to the consideration of your health,” you tease, fingers tiptoeing from his arm to his shoulder. He shivers at the touch. “Maybe, I just want to see what these strong hands can do with some dough.” 

His mere grin manages to send ripples of pleasure down your spine. Something dark and wicked crosses his face and you let out a shaky sigh. “Brat,” he teases. 

With a cat-like grin of your own, you close the door. 

Joel stands before the kitchen counter, the soft glow of the overhead light accentuating the contours of his figure. His sleeves are rolled up, revealing sinewy forearms that glisten with a slight sheen of flour. The muscles beneath his sun-kissed skin ripple as he reaches for the dough, his biceps forming a subtle bulge with each purposeful movement.

With a focused expression, he takes the smooth, slightly elastic dough in his hands. The material yields to his touch, supple yet resilient. As his strong fingers sink into the dough's yielding embrace, you can't help but admire the way he handles it. His touch is both firm and gentle, his hands a testament to years of construction work that have endowed him with strength and dexterity.

The dough stretches and folds, responding to his guidance with grace. His hands move with an almost mesmerizing rhythm, kneading and pressing, coaxing the dough into a state of perfection. The occasional wisp of flour dances in the air as he works.

You watch, entranced, as Joel's fingers work their magic. The concentration etched on his face, the way his lips quirk up in a faint smile as he loses himself while doing so makes your heart race.

As he works, you find your own fingers involuntarily tracing the outline of your wine glass.

"Enjoyin' the view, honey?" Joel's voice rumbles, breaking through the silence. You quickly set the wine glass down and begin to babble something in response, your words stumbling over each other. But before you can complete your sentence, Joel grips your wrist, pulling you toward him. Your back is flush against his solid chest.

His scent of pine and undeniable masculinity, surrounds you, intoxicating your senses as effectively as the wine you had been sipping. The shift in the atmosphere is palpable, charged with an electricity that sends shivers down your spine.

Joel's hands find yours, and he guides them to rest above the dough, his touch sending a jolt of awareness through you. “I’m the guest why the hell am I doin’ all the work?” His fingers intertwine with yours, his calloused skin brushing against your more delicate touch. Your heart beats in sync with the rhythm of his kneading.

Kneading the dough together, you feel a growing pressure against your lower back. It takes a moment for you to realize – his erection, firm and unmistakable, pressing against you. The realization sends a rush of heat to your cheeks, and your breath catches in your throat.

His hand drops to your waist, guiding the grind of your hips. You feel him as the dress you’re wearing dips between your asscheeks, clothed cock parting the two gently. A soft growl rumbles in his chest, the tremble of it felt against your back. Your focus has shifted. The dough forgotten entirely. 

“You’re makin’ cookin’ really hard, sweetheart.” 

You manage a breathless chuckle, "Oh, and whose fault might that be, Mr. Master Dough Kneader?"

He snarls into your ear, hot breath causing goosebumps. “You really are bein’ a brat today. Is there a special occasion for that?” 

Honestly, being a brat really wasn’t your objective. It just. . . sorta came out. You reveled when Joel took control, be it face-to-face or during streams. There’s always something primal lingering under his touches, his words. You roll your hips, cutting his breath short, you feel the length of him being dragged down between the plump flesh of your ass. 

“I just want to make you happy,” you say surprisingly soft. When you attempt to rub against him once more, he stops you, both hands now on your waist, squeezing you in warning. 

“You do make me happy,” he breathes out. His voice is deep, slivering down your back. Heat pools between your legs and you lean into his warmth. “Why would you say that?” 

“Forget it,” You hadn’t expected him to take it so seriously. Worry begins to inflate your chest, heat rising to the tips of your ears and making you short of sight. You attempt to reach for the tomato sauce, making sure to drag the plumpness of your behind against the heft of his cock in order to eradicate the moment. You don’t want him to think too much about it. Or decide that what you have—whatever it is—isn’t worth it. 

The pads of your fingers brush against the smooth surface of the bowl but you can’t reach it. Not quite. Joel turns you over, hands between your waist and the sharp edge of the counter. Frustrated, you fill your cheeks with air and shoot him a glare. “Seriously, it’s nothing, Joel.” 

“No it ain’t,” he snaps silently. “Why would you stress about makin’ me happy?” 

He scoffs at your silence, “What? You think I’m just passin’ the time by comin’ here? That if it’s not worth my time I’ll just leave?” he asks, baffled. Your gaze drops to the granite floor, bottom lip sucked between your teeth. Joel’s eyes go wide, bushy eyebrows almost touching his hairline. “Wait you actually think that?” 

You remain silent. 

“Sweetheart. . .” he shakes his head and pinches your chin, pulling your gaze back up. He looks concerned. Remorseful. You try not to think about your pulse skyrocketing under your skin, try to ignore the skip of your heart. “You really think I’m that shallow?” 

“No,” you answer suddenly, the need to defend him to himself burrowing in your chest. “It’s not that. I just. . . I don’t know. I’m confused I guess.” 

“‘bout what?” 

His thumb draws slow circles on your cheek, you close your eyes, heart and chest suddenly light as air. You could float if you had the capability. You nuzzle his hand like a hurt animal, begging for more of his touch. 

“I really really like you, you know.” 

“I really like you too, honey,” you ignore the way his words and smile make your skin prickle with delight. “But that doesn’t really answer my question.” 

You sigh, you’re stuck between the constant worry and the comfort he’s providing. Despite being known as a chatterbox, you’re having trouble finding the words. 

“I know that me streaming isn’t. . . conventional but I’m not seeing anyone else. I don’t even do private streams anymore,” your eyes flit between his eyes, trying to get a read of whiskey-colored eyes. Fear coats your tongue upon noticing his lips are a thin line—definitely not a good sign. “And well. . . I don’t plan on seeing anyone else either because. . .” 

You melt in relief when his lips finally crack into a small smile, “Because you really really like me?” 

“Precisely,” you say a bit loud and excited. “And of course, I don’t want you to feel pressure but. . . are you seeing anyone?” you clear your throat. “B—Besides me, that is.” 

“Well. .  . sometimes I watch CammingBravo when he’s streamin’.” 

“Joel!” you huff out a laugh and playfully smack his chest. “You know that’s not what I meant.” 

Adoration dots over his face, the corner of his eyes wrinkling with his smile. You love it when he teases you. Love it even more when he just stares at you with blatant amusement. The expression doesn’t linger long though. Like a small flame under rain, it sizzles out, his demeanor changing suddenly. 

His brows furrow, a crease you so desperately want to kiss away forming between them. Joel’s jaw ticks, the muscle above it twitching. He inches closer until your foreheads are pressed together, snug. Your heart is beating with rapid thumps, your breath caught in your throat.  

“I’m not seein’ anyone else either,” he says, voice thick with emotion. “And I’m not planin’ on seein’ anyone else either.” 

“R-Really?” 

He nods, “I want you, sweetheart. Completely. I don’t care what you do on your streams as long as you’re mine when the camera shuts off.” 

Your smile is instantaneous. It’s not like you planned on streaming for the rest of your life, arrangements could be made to make him more comfortable. And you had stopped collabing with Dieter ever since Joel came into the picture—though, now that you knew Joel watched the fallen-from-grace actor’s streams. . . you were getting ideas. 

Joel nudges you with the tip of his nose, smiling, yet still hesitant, “Say somethin’ will you?” 

“So, we both want to be exclusive?” you grin. “That’s what you’re saying?” 

“Reckon, I am,” he answers with a snort. He parts his lips to say more but you beat him to it, covering his mouth with your own. The kiss is long and sweet. It feels like a first kiss in a way, even though you have kissed Joel many many times before.

“Come on now, let’s get these ready and pop them into the oven,” his grin is wide as he pinches your ass, you jump with a yelp and he laughs. When you fix him a half-hearted glare, he only winks. The simple action makes your insides clench. “I’m starvin’.” 

The next day, you take Joel to your favorite coffee shop. They make the best bagel sandwiches and you’re eager for him to try them out. He gets the classic bacon, egg, and cheese, and you order the avocado BLT. You offer to pay, but Joel being Joel, he quickly distracts you by dragging his lips from your temple to your cheek, swiftly taking out his wallet.

You give him a look of pure betrayal. If you were wearing pearls, you’d be clutching them by now. “Joel Miller,” you say, aghast. “How dare you use your charm for evil?” 

His laughter fills the air as he hands his credit card to the barista, his broad chest rising and falling with each boisterous sound. Your lips twitch into a smile as he cups your waist, pulling you close. His lips touch your ear and heat warms your cheeks. “Sorry, honey. I can’t always use my powers for good.” 

All you can manage is a short nod. Your senses narrow on the way his breath ghosts your skin, warm and soft like a summer breeze. For a second you forget about the bagels and the coffee shop, all you can think of is him; his body, his voice, his scent—arousal pulses between your legs. If you were positive the two of you wouldn’t get arrested for public indecency, you’d let him take you against this very counter for everyone to see. 

“Come on now,” he teases, reading your expression easily. “I got the goods, let’s find ourselves a good table.” 

Alas, he really was holding a tray in his hands. You have no idea when the barista finished making your order. Either you’d been fantasizing for too long or you had one hell of a barista. 

The two of you stand awkwardly in the middle of the coffee shop and look around. You notice a couple of people staring you down, their gazes fixed on you, some of them even being bold enough to do the old-fashioned up-and-down. You quickly divert your gaze and point toward a table right next to the large windows. Frankly, you’re used to the staring. They rarely came up to you since no one wanted to be the one known for enjoying porn. Especially in public. Most of the time they’re harmless. 

Walking towards your table, you cheat a glance at Joel. If he did notice the looks, he didn't say anything. He made no indication of discomfort or anything of the sort. Relief sprinkles over you, maybe the looks weren’t as obvious as you initially had thought. 

Joel took a seat and you sat across from him, he shot you a look before reaching for his black coffee, “Everythin’ alright?” 

“Yeah,” you clear your throat, trying to keep your nerves in check. “Why wouldn’t I be?” 

Just as he opens his mouth, you notice someone approaching in your peripheral. You hold your breath, eyes dropping to the bagels. The person, whoever it was, just stands at the end of the table. You feel the stranger’s eyes eating you up. Fuck, of all the times why now? 

“May we help you?” you hear Joel say, his tone the complete opposite of his words. When you look up at him from between your lashes, he’s staring at the stranger, the look dancing on the line of being a full-on glare. You take a slow breath and turn. 

It’s a young-ish man with blonde hair and brown eyes. Your first expression of him is that he seems kind. He doesn’t acknowledge Joel’s presence at all which you find impressive. Even across from him, you can feel the heat of his stare. 

“Hi,” the man says kindly. “S-Sorry to bother you but are you Honeysuckle? On Ravish?” 

Joel visibly bristles at that. And, despite your better judgment, it turns you on. 

“Yup, that’s me,” you let out an awkward chuckle. He extends a hand and you quickly take it, wanting this to be done as soon as possible. 

“I love your streams!” 

“Thank you,” you smile with tight lips. “I appreciate your support.” 

“Can I get a picture?” 

Briefly, your gaze flits to Joel, a shadow crosses his face, eyes dark in warning. Your breath hitches a bit, skin prickling, some part of you wishes the hardened gaze was directed at you instead. 

You turn back to the man, “Sorry I don’t do pictures,” he seems visibly heartbroken by that so you quickly add. “But I can give you an autograph if it’s all the same to you.” 

Oh god, you hate when you have to put it like that. It makes you sound so full of yourself. You’re not a movie star. 

His eyes sparkle, “Thank you!” he pulls out a small notebook and hands it to you. “Can you make it out for Alex?” 

“Sure.” you quickly sign your name—well, not your name name but your stream name; Honeysuckle. You add a little heart next to the name and return the notebook. 

“Thank you!” he repeats, his genuine glee spreading in the air and caressing your skin. Your stomach does a small somersault as he walks away, clutching the notebook close to his chest. 

“Well, at least he was nice about it,” Joel grunts, finally taking a sip of his coffee. You’re not sure what to take from his response, or expression for that matter. Is he mad? You don’t think he is. You nearly jump out of your skin when his focused gaze suddenly snaps to you. “You alright?” 

“U-Uh, yeah,” you wave your hand in dismissal. “This kinda stuff happens. Most of the time they don’t say hi though.”

“So they just stare at you like a piece of meat?” 

“Pretty much, yeah.” your voice is uncaring. Honestly, you’re used to it by now. It’s not like you had the most respectable job, at least, not according to most people. You can only imagine the comments you would get if you had Instagram, or if Ravish didn’t have a tight-proof system that allowed you to ban people on sight. You reach for your sandwich and take a bite, you chew slowly. 

Joel snarls, “Assholes.” 

“I was hoping you didn’t notice,” you smile around your second bite. He seems almost offended by what you said, crossing his arms over the expanse of his chest. 

“Of course I did,” he huffed. “And why wouldn’t you want me to notice?” 

“I don’t know,” you truly didn’t. “I guess I didn’t want any hiccups to happen right after we decided to be. . . exclusive.” 

“Honey. . .” he gives you the tiniest smile, eyes full of care. “Don’t worry, people starin’ ain’t gonna get me packin’. Don’t you. . . don’t you know my feelings run deeper than that?” 

Joel's words hang in the air, his gaze searching your eyes for any sign of reassurance. The last thing you ever wanted was to make him feel like he was the source of your worry, the reason for your unease. Yet, here he was, looking like he believed he was to blame for your discomfort.

You lower your gaze to your sandwich, suddenly feeling a weight on your chest that has nothing to do with the bagel. It's not that you doubt his feelings for you, but you've carried the weight of your own insecurities for years, and it's hard to let go of them all at once.

Tears threaten to well up, and you quickly blink them away, not wanting to appear vulnerable in the middle of the coffee shop. You take another bite of your sandwich, chewing mechanically as you try to compose yourself. The flavors of avocado and bacon mix on your tongue, but they seem tasteless compared to the swirl of emotions within you.

Joel's hand finds yours on the table, his thumb rubbing soothing circles over your knuckles. When you finally muster the courage to meet his gaze, you're met with eyes that hold a storm of emotions. Concern, understanding, and a vulnerability that mirrors your own.

"You're not alone in this, you know?" he murmurs. 

You let out a shaky breath. You're not used to showing this side of yourself, not after so many years of self-preservation and guarding your heart and yourself.

"I guess I’m still not used to this yet" you murmur, your voice barely above a whisper. "It’s not your fault at all, it’s just been so long since I’ve been with anyone. . . emotionally. I'm sorry if I made you feel responsible."

He leans across the table, his warm hand cradling your cheek. His touch is gentle, his thumb caressing your skin. "I get it, sweetheart. And you don’t need to apologize. We’re the same in that aspect, I haven’t been with anyone for a long time either. Just. . .  know that I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. We'll figure this out together."

You lean into his hand, you’re feeling lighter already. 

Joel's lips curve into a tender smile, and he leans in to press a soft kiss to your forehead. "Besides," he mutters, sitting back. “I don’t run away from what’s mine.” 

Mine. 

One simple word. A noun of all things, is what makes you melt in your seat. It’s sobering. Waking you in a way that no amount of coffee ever could. Mine. He said that. You heard the possessive lilt laced with the word, almost daring you to object. You nearly do if you’re honest, shadows dance in his eyes, draw you in like a bunny rabbit sniffing a tempting trap. You want to take the bate. Sink your teeth into that carrot to see how he’ll react, the things he’ll do to prove just how true his words were. 

Instead, you clench your thighs together and propose something else instead. 

“Let me prove to you that I’m yours then,” you say. Eagerness caused Joel's eyes to widen, his jaw betraying his emotions with a subtle twitch. “In fact, let’s show the world.” 

No matter how vivid your imagination was, no matter how long you prepared and checked the equipment over and over again, nothing—absolutely nothing—could have prepared you for Joel walking through your bedroom door.

You had picked out a form-fitting black button-up shirt for him to wear. The fabric hugged his biceps, the seams barely holding on. The shirt stretched over the expanse of his chest, the buttons doing a better job compared to the seams in holding everything together. However, you were certain if he stretched even a little, the shirt would rip with a satisfying pop. 

That isn't all, though. Your eyes move up from the shirt, your gaze tracing the lines of his body until they land on the striking green mask he's wearing.

The mask is a deep shade of forest green, with intricate gold detailing that seems to dance in the light. Swirls and patterns weave across the surface, accentuating the gilded flakes in his eyes. 

His brown eyes peer out from behind the mask, a slight awkwardness to his gaze that seems to lessen with the hunger of your stare. The contrast between the vibrant green and the warmth of his gaze draws you in like a moth to a flame. The mask frames his face perfectly,  showcasing his strong jawline and the facial hair that clings to his skin.

"I feel dumb," he mutters, his voice a low rumble that sends shivers down your spine. “Isn’t there a way you can just make it so that my face is out of frame?” 

The mask had been his idea, he didn’t want to be recognized—rightfully so— and since he still wanted to stream. . . he bought himself a mask. 

Too bad he doesn’t realize the effect it has on you. Only if he could feel how wet you were for him, that’ll surely put him in a better mood. 

“Not really, we are going to be moving after all,” you answer. His gaze drops. “Joel, you look devastatingly hot right now.” 

His ears perk at that, eyes lifting to meet yours instantly. “Really?” 

"Come here," you manage to murmur, your voice laced with a mix of playfulness and longing. He obeys without hesitation, closing the distance between you in a matter of heartbeats. His hand reaches out, fingers curling beneath your chin as he tilts your head up. His eyes, those deep pools of honey, lock onto yours with an intensity that steals your breath away.

"Tell me," he whispers, his thumb brushing lightly over your lower lip. "What's on your mind?"

You swallow, your words catching in your throat for a moment before you manage to answer, your voice barely more than a breath. "You... the mask... everything. I can’t wait to feel you deep inside. Can’t wait for you to ruin me for everyone to see."

His lips curve into a smile, and he leans in, his breath mingling with yours as he murmurs against your lips, "Oh, don’t worry. I don’t plan on leavin’ an inch of you not clingin’ with my come, darlin’.” 

Oh, fuck. 

Fuck fuck fuck. 

Your lips part with a soft gasp and he slips his thumb into your mouth. Your tongue eagerly laps at his thumb, drawing circles, begging for him to press deeper. Heat radiates off of him, suffocating you in the best way possible. Your eyes drop to his crotch, the outline of his cock visible despite the dark blue denim.

Joel grins and shifts his hips closer, teasing you with a promise of more. You close your lips around his thumb and swallow. You’re in a trance. Body and soul bewitched by his presence. Your breasts feel full and heavy, nipples tingling. 

“Go and start the stream, honey.” 

Tingles. All you feel are tingles as you get up and desperately head toward your setup. Your legs are shaking. His eyes burning holes into your bare back. A second later his palm is on your ass, stroking the plump flesh and teasing the elastic of your panties. You sigh, the fabric sticking to your folds. 

With practiced efficiency, you start up the stream, the familiar hum of your equipment filling the room. Almost immediately, comments begin flooding in, your "hive" eagerly joining the live broadcast. The chat scrolls rapidly, filled with excited greetings and bee-themed emojis, a testament to the unique community you've cultivated.

"Hey there, my busy bees!" you greet, your voice filled with enthusiasm. "I hope you're all buzzing with excitement, because tonight we've got a special guest joining us."

You let a mischievous smile tug at the corner of your lips as your eyes flicker to the monitor. There he is, Joel, standing just behind you, his presence towering and captivating even though his head isn't visible on screen. The comments explode with excitement, the chat inundated with messages about how good he looks, how lucky you are, and playful exclamations about your "hunk of a guest” and how they can’t wait for him to “pump you full of his come”. A bit crass, but you can’t say you disagree. 

You continue, "But first, let's give a warm welcome to our newbies! Welcome to the hive, where we celebrate all things sweet and sticky." you wink at the camera and bend slightly over, wiggling your ass. Joel doesn’t waste any time moving directly behind you, hands on your waist as he pushes forward, making you feel the heft of his cock between your cheeks. A small moan escapes you, breasts swaying with his shallow grinds. 

“And now, without further ado,” you say breathless. “Let’s start the show. Our guest is an impatient one,” you hear Joel scoff behind you, the voice making your pussy bottom out. “Am I wrong, sir?” 

His nails bite into your flesh, showing you just how much he enjoys being called that. You smile as you stand up, giving one last look to the monitor to check everything is in place, you face Joel. You lean closer for a kiss, hoping that it’ll soothe his nerves. He must be nervous. 

But before you can close the distance, he grabs your chin and pushes you back, just proving how wrong you are. Your eyes widen, the pressure he applies to hallow your cheeks emptying the oxygen in your lungs. “Not so fast,” he grunts. “On your knees, honey. Only good girls get kisses.” 

Your insides pulse with a vicious throb. His voice takes on a tone you've never quite heard before. It's deep, a resonant rumble that seems to vibrate through the very core of your being. His voice, deep and resonant, like thunder during a storm and wraps around you like a velvet cloak, warming you. As you slowly sink to your knees, your pulse quickens in response. 

A desperate, hushed rustling fills the room as a zipper is lowered and briefly, you steal a quick glance at the streaming setup, ensuring that everything continues to run smoothly. Joel’s head is still out of view, which you regret because you want everyone to see how good he looks in his mask—

His touch is a sudden and deliberate pull, “Eyes on me,” he growls, the bulbous head of his cock pressing against your lips. His fingers are wrapped around his impressive length, and instead of notching the head between your lips, he smacks your parted lips with it. A drop of precome stains your bottom lip, a string of it following the tip as he holds it above your face. Your eyes are glued to the masked figure above you. Despite the tone and the roughness, they’re just pools of soft honey, internally searching your face for any discomfort. 

Joel begins to stroke himself and with a heavy gaze, you part your lips wider and stick your tongue out for him to use you however he pleases. 

His dark chuckle makes your skin prickle with need. You come closer, dragging your tongue between his balls, nuzzling him sweetly. Joel curses above you and grips your shoulder, holding you back. 

“Sir, please,” you gasp, attempting to get close but his hand keeps you at a small distance. 

He doesn’t acknowledge your pleas, “Push those pretty tits together, sweetheart.” 

Desperate and dripping, you press them together with your arms. His cock comes from under, the head piercing your tits as it pushes from between them. Joel hooks his thumb in your mouth and you obediently suck around the digit as he begins to thrust. Neither of you breaks eye contact. 

Joel pushes himself further into you, driving his hips forward. His cock slides between your tits, filling your already open mouth with vigor as he rocks in and out of your ample cleavage. You moan around his thumb, the warmth of his precum dripping over your tongue. 

Your body rocks with each stroke, the pleasure radiating through your chest with each thrust. Your nipples throb with arousal, hard like diamonds, as he slams his rigid cock into your tits. Sweat beads on his forehead and he grits his teeth, “Keep them together,” he grunts as he pulls out, with the head, he smears drops of himself over your heated skin. 

Your eyes roll back at how possessive it is, the fact that everyone is watching already forgotten. “Good,” he says, pleased. He pulls away his thumb and drags it over your bottom lip. “You’re already so dumb for my cock, aren’t you. Eager to show your viewers how badly you want to be good for me hmm?” 

God, the tremors in his voice, that southern drawl. He’s going to be the death of you. 

“Y-Yeah,” you pant, chest heaving. Ignoring the ache it causes in the back of your neck, you lean forward and manage to taste him on your skin. You moan as your eyes flutter closed, your own breath warm against you. “Want to be your good girl again, sir.” 

He pulls away from you completely, heading towards the bed. You stare at him blearily as he takes a seat, only coming to your senses when he hits his thigh, gesturing you to come over.  

Just as you’re about to sit, he stops you, clicking his tongue while lifting a hand. “First strip, darlin’. Turn to the camera,” you don’t miss the way he smiles as you turn on shaky legs, staring directly into the lens. “Have you already forgotten how to stream? My poor sweet dumb girl.” 

His words send you into a haze of submission. Needles stinging your back, you peel off your panties and bra, dropping them to the floor. “Good,” he hums. “Now sit on my lap, spread those legs so they can see how wet you got just from gettin’ her tits fucked.” 

Joel scoots further back and gives you space on the bed to place your feet. With heavy lids, you spread yourself for him—and the people who’re watching at home. Your front facing the camera. To expose yourself in such a way, it’s different compared to what you normally do. You have fun with Dieter but it’s never like this, never as intense. A shaky breath escapes you when Joel places a hand on the inside of your thigh, pushing your legs further apart. He’s staring at you through the monitor, jaw slack. Meanwhile, you’re just happy people can see his mask, those brown eyes. 

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he mutters, his role forgotten. “Look at you. Fuck,” his lips touch your ear, whispering the rest of the words so it’s only you that can hear. “You never stopped bein’ my good girl. Just sayin’.” 

Your vision blurs with tears and you nod, his lips now on your cheek. He drags his mouth to your forehead and lays another kiss. “Now let’s give them a show.” 

Joel cups your ass as he helps you lift yourself, aligning himself against your sopping core, he slowly lowers you, filling you inch by inch. Your head falls back, mouth agape, you’ve forgotten how big he is, how satisfying it is to take him so slowly. His breath is hot on your nape. “That’s it,” he purrs. “Just like that, show them how good you take cock, honey.” 

 “‘S big,” you slur. “S–So big, sir.” 

He shushes you, lips moving over your cheek. “I know, honey I know,” he licks the salt off your skin. “But you’re my good girl, aren’t you? You can take it.” 

Joel rears up, slowly pushing himself into you. His hands guide your hips to the right angle to let him slide deeper, your soft cries echoing through the air. 

“I am,” you gasp, delirious, his cock completely sheathed inside. “I am. I–I’m your good girl.” 

You twist around, straddling Joel as he takes both your hands and draws you close. His lips crash against yours, and you moan into his mouth as you grind your hips against him. Heaven help you, how can you take him like this with an audience? Images of all the people watching on your live stream dance in your mind, but it makes it all the hotter.

Your body rocks up and down as you ride him, your inner walls clenching around him. You’re panting and moaning, your body shaking as you pump harder.  You feel Joel shift beneath you, his grip tightening as you take him even deeper, arching your back and pushing your breasts out. You can feel his eyes on you, as well as the eyes of the viewers watching you live stream. His cock glistens with your slick, every time you lift yourself, the light catches against it, everyone watching seeing how worked up Joel gets you. 

You can feel Joel's warmth radiating throughout your body as he slides back and forth, gaining momentum as he thrusts harder. You stifle a moan, your eyes fluttering as pleasure overcomes you, your head humming with pleasure. Your body starts to slow, your muscles aching and trembling. 

Suddenly Joel grips your waist, fingertips leaving dents in your flesh. He growls in your ear, drops of spit hitting your neck. “Who told you to slow down?” he pulls your body against him, forcing himself deeper into you. Every inch of you is shaking as Joel's hips slam against yours. His fingers find your clit, drawing gentle, quick circles around the sensitive nub. You cry out, clenching around him. “Look into the camera,” he groans. “Want them to see your fucked out gaze when I make you squirt.” 

Your hands find purchase above his knees, the coil in your stomach tight, it’s too much. Too fucking much. Your head is swimming in a lavender haze, and before you know it, your cunt is pulsing around him, gushing and slowing his thrusts. You hear the faint pitter patters of a rain-like sound. 

You barely register the liquid spraying from you, your body hot and burning while Joel’s fingers continue to move. Your drip down his length and down the inside of his thighs, and he rips another, albeit calmer, orgasm from you.  

“Shiiiiiit,” he drawls. “Shit shit, honey, fuck, don’t move—” he makes a choked-out sound and spears you down flush on his cock. The sounds you make are completely debauched. A series of sir’s dropping from your lips, tongue aching to moan his name. You feel him spilling inside, so much, you think, so much of it filling you up. He’s still throbbing when he pulls out, gripping himself and ringing the last of it over your glistening cunt, drowning it in come. 

“Oh fuck,” you murmur as he pushes it back in with the head of his length, you shudder around him. “So full,” you say, eyes dropping where you two connect through the reflection in the monitor. 

“Not done,” he mutters and helps you lift yourself over him, cock slowly softening. “Push it out darlin’. Show them how much there is to keep you satisfied.” 

“F-Fuck,” you let out a whimper, eyelids fluttering as his seed trickles out of you and drips over his length. You feel faint of heart, this probably being one of the filthiest things you’ve done on camera. 

“Good girl,” he says, eyes glued to the camera. “My good girl,” he repeats, cupping your mound and slipping one finger inside with ease. 

Joel gently lays you down on the bed, your body too weak to do anything. He walks up to the stream set up, his eyes flashing toward the camera one last time. “See y’all next time.” he taunts before shutting the entire thing off. 

He throws the mask to the ground near your discarded clothes. 

You don’t know what to think when he climbs onto the bed, mattress dipping with his weight before he pulls you to his chest. He kisses you slowly, taking his time as he tastes you. “Sorry,” he whispers into your mouth. “I think I might’ve gone overboard.” 

“No,” you sigh dreamily, still in a haze. “That was perfect. I—I don’t think I can walk for a while.” 

You let out a low chuckle and he smiles, pressing his lips into your forehead. 

“Well, good thing I’m here then.”  

[cowboybarzy]

reconciliation — mat barzal

some barzy smut for you all :) wanted to wait posting this but those videos of him playing guitar just came out so we are all in desperate need for this rn!! as a reminder: video one two

word count: 2.9k

warning: SMUT (18+) & undisclosed fight (sorry I was too lazy to come up with a better backstory so just know it was fairly bad fight and this starts a couple hours afterwards)

You laid awake, desperately trying to fall asleep, but your fight with your boyfriend played in your head over and over again. It was so stupid and you hated that you were still mad, especially since he was leaving for a few days the next day. But you were too stubborn to be the bigger person and turn around and apologize.

Mat felt the same, though, the sleepless ness getting to him and turning around to face your back. He wrapped an arm around you and gently kissed your cheek. "Hey," he whispered, pulling himself closer to you until you were perfectly nestled to him. "We said we'd never go to sleep angry. I'm sorry. I love you."

You nodded, but didn't turn to face him. Your hand lifted to cradle his cheek and with an 'I love you, too' you both were finally able to fall asleep.

***

You spent the next few days alone, Mat being gone on a roadie. While you hadn't exactly talked about your fight, you mutually decided to just drop it since neither of you wanted to stay angry at each other. You face timed every day like normal, although there wasn't any spicy time that you would usually share. You saved that for after he hung up.

You could hear the music blasting from your apartment before you even stepped inside. Mat was back, since the early afternoon actually, but you were stuck at work. Yelling for him when you stepped foot inside the apartment wouldn't work, so after getting rid of you jacket and shoes you went to look for him. And what a sight when you did. He was dancing and singing along to the music, while attempting to chop an onion.

"Whatcha doin?" He jumped at your voice, dropping the knife and almost cutting himself.

"Don't scare me like that!" The shock on his face claimed after a second and he went to turn down the music and wash his hands before he pulled you in for a hug. "Missed you."

"Missed you." After a long kiss, you looked around to figure out what he was doing. "You're making dinner? For me?"

"Hey! I cook for you."

"Mhm."

"What? I do! You're just better than me that’s why I don’t do it so much." You patted his chest with a chuckle and kissed him again, shutting him up.

You helped him prepare the meal for a bit, before you went to go take a shower. Since seeing him today, especially in the kitchen, you had felt incredibly horny and devised a plan on how your night would go. But shower first.

After lotioning up and making you smell irresistible, you slipped into some sexy matching lingerie. You pulled on of his boxers overtop to be comfortable, but also show off your ass, and one of his white tshits that would show him exactly what was going on underneath.

You set the table when you came back and not long after you sat down for dinner. Throughout eating, you brushed your hair seductively and made some inappropriate noises, to get him riled up. And he did, but he could see exactly through what you were doing, so he didn't make a move. While he did want to flip this table to get to you, he just sat there staring at you, looking at wherever you wanted him to.

"This actually was pretty good," you said, taking a sip of you water. "I just hope desert is better."

His eyes darkened while you smirked at him. You were both staring at each other, fueling the heat in each of your bodies until you got enough.

"I must be getting my period or something, because I have been so horny these past few days," his body twitched, wanting to reach out to you. "Too bad you weren't there."

You got up to take both of your plates to the sink. "But don't worry, our pink friend helped me out a lot."

"What?!" You smiled at him from where you leaned against the kitchen island, showing off your legs. "And I didn't get a video or a call? Baby, come on." He was frustrated and tried to stand, but with a show of hand you got him to sit down again. You stalked over to him until you stood directly in front of him, looking down.

"I guess I was still mad at you," you said and slowly let you hands trace his cheek. Then you sat down on his lap where he immediately gripped your hips. Then you leaned down to whisper in his ear, "and I thought you should earn to see them."

"So... So, you did take a video?," he asked, his voice stammering.

"Maybe." You lips traced his jaw. "Maybe there's more than one." You let your hip roll, meeting his hard erection. "What are you going to do to earn the right to see them?"

He groaned as his head fell back. "Fuck, baby, anything. I'll do anything."

With that, you finally let him kiss you.

"Well? Show me what you got." And he did. You gave the control over to him and without hesitation he had you up and pressed down on the dining table. With a hard pull, your boxers and panties were off and he was staring down at you like a wild animal.

"God, you're so hot." His hands massaged your thighs before pulling your shirt up to expose your breasts contained in your black lace bra. He bent to to trace the outline of your tits with his lips. Swiftly, he ripped both cups down, exposing them all the way.

"Yes, suck them, Mat. Please ... please suck them," you begged, the sound so desperate that he complained immediately with a moan. He cupped your breast in his hand, squeezing it hard as he sucked your nipple between his lips. You moaned together and your hand got ahold of his head, pushing him into you. He played with both of your tits, sucking, nipping, licking, and squeezing, until you both got impatient and he got back down on his knees with a smirk. "Ready?"

His mouth descended onto your slick pussy, to which your pelvis shot up to meet his face. "Oh fuck." Hands still on your thighs, he took long, languid strokes with his tongue. You squirmed beneath him as he lapped away at you, never fully pushing all the way in against your clit, just staying around the outside, prepping you for what he had planned.

With two fingers, he spread you wide, exposing your clit, and then lowered his tongue to just above it.

And he hovered, letting you feel his heavy breath and the scruff of his jaw against your inner thigh.

"Mathew," you moaned. "Please."

With his hand that wasn't spreading her, he moved it back up your body, and just as he pinched your left nipple between your fingers, he press his tongue against your clit.

"Oh my . .. fuck." Your eyes squeezed shut, arching into him. He did it again. And again. And again. "More," you begged. "I need more."

In response, Mat pressed his tongue against your slit and lightly flicked at it, creating a vibration against the nub that caused you to grip his head and dig your fingers digging into his scalp. "Fuck, Maty. Oh my God . . . keep going."

His eyes lifted, to keep them on you to watch your reactions as he continued to pleasure you at a relentless pace. Your body grew tighter and tighter and your breath picked up as you got closer and closer to the edge.

His tongue attacked your clit more aggressively, pushing against it, sucking it. Your moans grew louder and your body tensed. Then your orgasm crashed over you, sending you into full body tremors. "Fuck... fuck." Mat sucked and licked you up until the tremors subsided and you laid there, limp, on the table.

Mat got back on his feet and bent over you to kiss you gently. His lips pressed small wet kisses along your neck and collarbone, until you had recovered enough to gain function over your limbs again. Your first act was to pull his shit off his chest, then you clung to him, wrapping both your legs and arms around him.

With his strong arms, Mat picked you up and set you in his lap when he plumped into your living room couch. "I love eating your sweet little pussy, feeling it clench around my tongue," he whispered into your ear as he pulled your hair. "But I love feeling it clench around my cock even more."

You moaned as your head fell into the crook of his neck. You were ready and desperate for him again and he knew immediately by the way you were rocking your hips, searching for his cock.

"You love that, too, eh? Feeling my dick pulsing deep inside you." You nodded quickly, hoping it would get him to do something faster. And he did, pulling his dick out of his sweatpants, pumping it a couple times in front of your eyes. Then he pulled on your hair, making you sit up straight while he leaned back. "Ride me. But don't let me inside you. I want to see just how slick that pussy is."

Your hungry eyes connected, but both of your heads soon fell back with moans as you slowly moved your wet cunt over his cock. "Oh my God, Maty, this feels... incredible."

"You feel incredible," he says in response as you fell forward, bringing your breast into him mouth. He focused on your nipple, swirling around it with his tongue, flicking and then nibbling just enough that you sucked in a sharp breath of air. With his hand, he did the same thing to your other breast as you continued to rock on him.

"I can come just like this," you say, your hands falling to his chest and your pelvis lifting just slightly to get a better angle. "Fuck, I'm already close."

"Then come. Use me, fuck me like this." His moans spurred you on, driving you closer to the edge. 

Your lips pressed together, as your eyes squeezed shut and your pace picked up. Your thrusts became more erratic until you reached your orgasm. "Fuck!" Your body shook and spasmed as you rode out your orgasm until there was nothing left to take. The you collapsed on top of him.

"That was so hot," he whispered, his voice raspy. "Now be a good girl and lie down." You obeyed, falling into to cushions exhausted. "Turn."

When you did, he gave your ass a hard slap, the echo of your skin filling the air. Then he moved a pillow under your pelvis and gave your ass another slap, before he moved his thumb over your arousal, swirling it around your entrance, and positioning his cock where he wants it.

With gritting teeth, he pushed his hips forward and with a hard thrust he pushed in his cock in your pussy until he bottomed out. You both moaned loudly and his grip got tighter on your hips as he tried to restrain himself. "More," you moaned as you started moving your hips.

"Babe, don't move. Please... fuck." You moved your pelvis anyway, and he matched the thrusts because he was as desperate as you. "I won't last."

"Do it, Mat. Fuck me as hard as you can." With a groan, the grip on your hips tightened again as he started pumping into you relentlessly. He had no control, all he was doing was fucking you chasing his release. Your pussy gripped his cock so tightly, spurring on both of your thrusts. He was pushing into you so hard, that the sound of your skin slapping was so loud, you thought the neighbors would be able to hear it.

"I'm right there. Fuck, I'm there," he groaned and moaned until he exploded inside you. Thick, warm ropes of his cum coated your insides. "Fuuuuck."

Out of nowhere, you started shaking as you reached your third orgasm. Your vision went black and your breath hitched while milking the last drops of his cum. Your body felt like jello as you came down from your high. Mat collapsed next to you, but you barely registered it. You were to exhausted to move or speak, so you laid there catching your breath.

Eventually, Mat's arm snuck around you and turned you to pull you into his chest. "Good enough to get that video?"

"Mhm," was all you answered and he smiled victorious, but little did he know he wasn't going to see it for a couple more weeks...

***

You had expected the call. After finally sending him the video of yourself playing with your pink vibrator, you had expected him to call you. For your own pleasure in the situation, like you hadn't had enough fun messing with him, you had sent the video at a time you knew he would see the notification but wouldn't be able to open it for another few hours. You reveled in the fact that he would be on the edge, dying to open that video, but couldn't because he was with his team in mandatory meetings.

You had expected the call. Which is why you were already ready and waiting in bed. What you didn't expect though, was to see Mat's fist wrapped around his cock moving up and down, instead of his face.

The camera flipped to show his face after a moment, revealing a very turned on Mat. "You little slut. You enjoyed that, didn't you? Torturing me even more by dangling that video in front of me?"

You smiled as you sank back into your pillows. "Yes."

"Turned you on, eh? Messing with me like that." He moved his phone so that you could see him from his thighs up and, god, nothing beat that view. "See what you do to me? Fuck, baby, that video was so hot. Screaming my name like that when I wasn't even there. All mine. You're mine." You were on edge and your hand itched to slide between your legs. "Did you have fun without me?"

"Wasn't that video proof enough?," you teased him again, but you knew it wasn't as good as it was without him.

"Tell me the truth or I'm hanging up."

You rubbed your hand over your panties and gave in. "Nothing feels right when you're not here." You need him and hear his voice to get off. "God, Maty, I'm so on edge right now. I need you." You positioned the camera so he, too, could see your body.

"Alright, I'll be nice. Strip. Take those fucking panties off and let me see your wet cunt." You did as instructed, even taking your bra off. "Now glide your fingers up and down your body and around your breasts without touching your nipples. Just like that, baby. Slower, I want you to feel how soft your skin is."

As your hand slid across your skin, you regretted teasing him for so long because you had a feeling he was going to do the same to you. "Slide your fingers closer to your pussy, tease yourself the way I'd tease you. Get close to your slit but don't touch yourself."

Your hand lowered and, when you got close enough, your pelvis lifted. "Don't fucking touch that cunt. It's mine."

"Don't make me wait," you groaned, throwing your head back in agony.

"Now who's talking."

"You liked it, I know it." You smirked, then dared to move your hand closer to your center.

"Shush. Spread your legs more and slowly spread those lips for me." You did, moaning at the sensation. "Fuck, look at you. I wish I was there, eating that wet pussy. Sucking on your clit, driving my dick so hard inside you that you can practically taste my cum in the back of your throat."

"Maty, I need more. Please," you begged as you breathing increased. You were so wet already and so close to your orgasm when you hadn't even really touched yourself yet. When you looked to your phone, you saw Mat started pumping his cock again.

"My dick is so hard, baby. Shit. Yes, go, finger yourself. I need to see you touch yourself."

Finally, you got two fingers to slowly circle your clit. "Oh, fuck," you yelled as head fell back again and your eyes rolled back in ecstasy.

"That's it, baby, keep up the pace. I need you to match my strokes. Pinch your nipple too. I want you to mark yourself."

Your hips lifted as your fingers sped up, chasing your release. And it was getting close. You looked to your phone, where Mat was still grunting while he worked himself. You saw a big bead of precum spill out of the tip of his cock, then he moaned loudly. "I'm there. Fuck, I'm gonna cum."

"Me too." You had no idea if he heard you, but your orgasm started crashing over you and you lost track of all of your senses for a moment. Your spams started slowly and then descended into full body shudders that left you screaming his name.

While you caught your breath, you turned to take your phone back into your hand. You saw Mat with a small smile looking at you, hand still around his cock, but his sticky cum spilled on his skin.

"You are an evil little woman," he said, which made you laugh. "But, god, what I wouldn't do for you."

[goodolddumbbanana]

Miku voice “ECLIPSE! ECLIPSE! What do you think of the allegations that you and my boss fuck nasty after your fights?”

Solar, tired of hee doing this EVERY TIME: miku I swear to god.

Sun has to use water spray on Miku to make her behave.

---

It wasn't often that he saw the green haired henchman of SUN, but he swore every time she appeared, his life felt more and more miserable.

Like, Even with everything SUN has done, Solar actually doesn't hate that villain that much personally because at some levels, he kinda understands the feeling of wanting to destroy everything and just live thoroughly doing whatever hell he wants without caring about others.

But Miku? He hates her. He hates her so much. She likes Cain for his existence with the way she breathes, the way she talks. Solar doesn't understand how and why, Eclipse, the other Eclipse, the reformed clone who tried to kill him multiple times per month, actually in a good term with her, if not want to say they look really like lovers with how much that Eclipse cares about Miku.

And here again in the moment of heat and brutal fight, that green onion girl shows up.

"Oh hey hero dear, do you mind if I ask what types of oil do you guys use when you guys you know... Fuck? I want my writing to become more realistic."

"Wha--t?!"

"Do you guys smell when you guys do that? What type of kinks play do you guys tend to do?"

"And also, is SUN the bottom? I have asked Boss before but he just dropped me at the lake without any warning. He is so mean~~~"

Solar wanted to say they should do something worse than throw her neck into the lake.

Solar wanted to say that her presence made him almost forget why he wanted to be a hero, that he had never in his life felt the urge to snap someone out of existence as much as he wants to do with her.

But Solar was sure that if he said that, Miku would say something disgusting shits like 'aw, he likes her' and that what he said was sooooo romantic.

So Solar slowly and roughly broke the iron bar in his hand into a fine powder and picked the sharpest edge to give to Miku.

"Madam, You are not supposed to be here. Please go anywhere else before I treat you like some common villain."

"Aw~~~ Kyah~~~ You mean you care for me so much you don't want to harm me!!!! That is so romantic, but sorry, I have someone already~~~ you are so good but I am so sorry."

"... You know what... Fuck it. SUN? Can I kill your heinchman?"

"Wh--? No!!! And she usually just comes back worse so you better not do it!!!"

"But she is Miku!! There is nothing worse than Miku."

"No."

"And they keep saying they are not sleeping together. "

"MIKU--- I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP---"

" What--? You pound your **** in my *** and "***"" (*insert a lot of vulgar words*)

"..."

"..."

"BAD!! BAD MIKU!! Go home, now!" (*sparing water on Miku*)

[a-secret-inner-life]

I came across a lot of stuff that I could relate to about autism while researching for a paper, which led me to do more research on autism in general. I saw some other people doing this type of post on here, so: autistic people, can you please read my super long and detailed list of possible symptoms I experience and tell me if it seems like I'm one of you? I'm trying to be objective and reasonable and figure out what's going on with myself here.

Sensory Stuff

I like to stim–bouncing my legs, tapping my feet when I sit, occasionally swinging my legs or rocking. I also clench my fists or sit on my hands a lot and tap my fingers on things, or just fiddle with whatever is in front of me. Recently, I count while touching my thumb to each of my fingertips to calm down because someone in a book I read did that and it actually does help me. I also sing the alphabet song repeatedly when I'm working on my website.

Sometimes when I'm very tired or overwhelmed my face feels itchy and I feel like every strand of hair touching me prickles and itches and leaves a red spot (but it doesn't actually).

I have a strong hatred for perfume because it smells too strong and fakey, and citrus scents also drive me nuts, but I really like scented candles.

I'm a super picky eater, although I'm not as bad as when I was a kid. I don't mind the taste of tomatoes, peppers, or onions in things, but I'm still a little grossed out when I know I'm eating them, and the texture of onions freaks me right out, as an example.

I get startled easily. Loud noises don't actually scare me, they just jolt me out of whatever thought space I was in before I heard them.

I also get overwhelmed whenever someone tries to talk to me in a loud car (whether it's loud with other people or just the engine), and I find it overwhelming and incredibly difficult to concentrate when more than one person is talking at once. Whenever I'm in a crowd, it just sounds like this vague roar that gets louder the more I think about it, which can sometimes be overwhelming. Still, I'm good at tuning some things out in select circumstances, like the TV when it's on.

Finally, if I pay attention at pretty much any time when there isn't a ton of other noise, I can hear ringing in my ears. This isn't usually upsetting, and I know it's fairly common for anyone to get tinnitus from time to time, but I'm not sure if most people experience it this much.

Social Stuff

I can not handle eye contact.

I'm also really, really, comically bad at social interactions. I almost never speak to someone I don't know well before they speak to me, and my go-to conversation method is to laugh/giggle and nod, I literally can not make actual conversation to save my life. Sometimes I think of things to say but it doesn't occur to me to say them, or I try to but I'm scared and can't find an opening, or I do say the thing and people don't react the way I want them to (usually it's either confusion or disinterest).

Old ladies are my favorite people because they're the least scary somehow. I also love kids, but I'm still awkward so I rarely interact and probably still freak them out.

I'm horrible at keeping contact and I wait until I know people are offline to reply to their messages because conversation is stressful and I need time to think when I text. Group chats are a nightmare, so I pretty much ghost everyone when I'm in one.

I'm super attached to my family, though. I make an effort to create a deep bond with each of my siblings, and I'm the clingiest person in the world when it comes to my older sister.

I value people very deeply, which might be why I find them so intimidating. I love them and I want them to be happy, and I put too much pressure on the situation.

I used to hate being alone, and I still feel guilty or sad whenever I spend too much time by myself, although I actually love to be by myself, a lot of my hobbies and favorite places are solitary, and I usually prefer figuring things out on my own rather than having somebody right there trying to figure it out with me.

I'm incredibly empathetic. It's not like I can automatically sense people's emotions, but I do make an effort to pay attention and understand what they're feeling and why they feel that way. My siblings come and rant to me a lot, and I can be a good diplomat and see both points of view when they argue. I also care, and I always want to make people feel better, though it obviously doesn't always work. Sometimes I'm too empathetic, or maybe too creative, and I stress out about what someone might be feeling when I don't know if it's an actual issue or not.

Patterns and Stuff

I've always been good at remembering my parents’ phone numbers and our zip code, as well as my friends’ birthdays. I work at a grocery store where I find myself reciting the regular customers’ lottery numbers in my head as they're saying them to me.

My dad used to have a verbal checklist of what to bring to work each morning, and I still recite it every time I hear the words “wallet” and “keys” next to each other. Same goes for my old morning checklist that I don't even follow anymore.

I don't adhere to a strict routine in terms of the general structure of my day, but I definitely have a system or pattern for a lot of my specific activities.

Emotional Stuff

I've been obsessed with drawing and painting for as long as I can remember. I write all the time. I think I dedicated myself and a huge chunk of my life to my hobbies. If I like something, I like to think that I make it my own, and that thing permeates who I am.

When I first started listening to BTS, I scoured literally the entire Internet to find every possible hidden track any of the members ever touched, and there were A LOT. Lately I've been obsessed with Keeper of the Lost Cities, and I can't stop talking about the books. I'm also hyper fixated on Tomorrow X Together.

When I start something, I need to finish it, and I'll often think I'm so close to being done only to continue on it for several more hours, trying to hurry up and finish because I need to get it done now. I'm also pretty bad at switching tasks. I try to multitask, but it doesn't really work out.

I can easily forget about my own physical needs; particularly I don't usually realize when I'm hungry. Overall my needs are very flexible to the people around me; if you want to eat together, suddenly I'm hungry, if you don't feel like stopping, neither do I.

I'm a perfectionist, but I hate asking for help. This is especially true when it comes to my grades and my hobbies. I'm more comfortable when I can control the variables and nobody has to know if I fail.

I'm pretty sure I have executive dysfunction because I put so much pressure on doing things perfectly that I lose the motivation to do them at all, and as much as I need to get something done, I can't make myself do it.

Since I was little I've always been awkward and out of place. I feel like I take up too much space. Honestly, I feel like my existence is lame and embarrassing. I hate myself.

I absolutely suck at decision making, sometimes because I don't want to choose something that other people won't like and partially because I'm just really indecisive. Often I feel stuck or paralyzed because I can't choose one way or another.

Along those same lines, the responsibility of being told to do something for someone else is terrible, and I hate doing these things without incredibly specific instructions because I'm scared of messing up.

I also need to know exact details of whatever activity I'm doing before I do it, and I hate when something big isn't planned out in detail.

I used to have a lot of meltdowns as a child. I’d yell and cry and throw things when I was upset. This still happens sometimes, but not as frequently or as badly.

I feel guilty about everything, including mistakes from years ago that shouldn't matter anymore. This makes me feel sort of unworthy (?), like anything good I do is the bare minimum and if I cause a problem (through anxiety or executive dysfunction) that messes up a project, I feel like I have to do everything else perfectly to make up for it, although I usually end up feeling like I'm coddling myself instead.

I constantly compare myself to others. If someone else has a problem that's worse than what I deal with, I feel like I'm not allowed to have my own negative feelings.

I feel like none of my feelings are valid. I feel and think all sorts of dramatic things that seem like the end of the world, but compared to others, my problems are small, and I feel stupid for having them. I almost wish I had a bigger issue or more dangerous mental problems that would make my responses more reasonable, but my logical side knows that this thinking is wrong.

I've been dealing with off and on burnout since I was around twelve years old (so about five years). I've been told over and over that my mindset is wrong and I need to do a million things better mentally to be less of a perfectionist, but I don't have the energy to put in any effort whatsoever to fix myself. I still get random bursts of motivation that last for short periods of time, though.

Sometimes when I go to bed after a stressful day, I wake up in the morning and I have this uncontrollable dread about starting my day. The thought of getting up sounds impossible, and it's almost like there's something sitting in my chest keeping me down.

[spidey-bie]

Guess who unwillingly read a smut work again? Yay 😑. (It was the first thing I saw when I first woke up. I started this at 7 am yesterday morning.) I will admit that it was kinda on me this time for not having the Miguel smut tag blocked but there was nothing that could've led me to believe that it'd be smut in the first place so my point still stands. Label your smut works.

TW: More pet names and nicknames. (I am a romantic aromantic I'm so sorry 😔) This is a loose continuation of the previous one.

You were awaken, unfortunately, by the jarring sounds of your morning alarm. You groggily look over to surprised to see your beloved s/o Hobie Brown still dozing away. Usually he'd sleep in his own room but you both had decided to have a sleepover the night before. At least this meant that you didn't have to make a trip to go and wake him.

"Bie." You shake him lightly. You only get a groan. "C'mon Bie you gotta get up."

"Just five more minutes." You thought about taking him up on his offer but, history has shown that this only led to you both sleeping in till noon. You had plans for the day and they required the both of you to be up at 8. Unfortunately Hobie had no plans on budging. Usually you'd gently ease him awake but time was ticking away. You had to take a more direct approach.

Begrudgingly you leave the comforts of your warm bed and head towards a window. If you weren't awake before the cold air had woken you up now. You open the curtains to let the sunlight pour in and wrestle the covers from his arms. (At least you knew that if a criminal attacked in the early morning Hobie would be fine. Unfortunately your blanket was not.)

"UGGGGGGH." He groaned as he tried to shield his eyes with his hand.

"Nope. I can't leave you here. You'd never get up before one if not for me."

Hobie grumbled something about time being a concept and moved his hand away.

"Bug must you torture me like this?"

You give him a tired giggle.

"I'm sorry Bie but it was the only way."

He sits up and yawns. This was a good sign. Hopefully he'd soon make his way to the bathroom to get ready for the day. Hopefully.

"I'm gonna get started on breakfast. Please at least be out of bed before I get back." You wait for his reply.

He wipes the sleep from his eyes and nods. You head to the kitchen.

You pop a couple frozen beignets in the oven and throw the rice that you prewashed into a pot. By the time the rice had finished Hobie had emerged from the bathroom much more chipper than before.

"The bathroom's all yours." He gives you a wink.

"I leave the rest to you sir." You give him a mock salute and he rolls his eyes. Quickly you make your way to the bathroom.

****************************************************

You turn the water on and throw on a clear shower cap over your neon purple bonnet. You take note of Hobie's matching neon pink one laying on the vanity. He hated it when you first bought it for him. Yet, without fail he wire it every night. Whenever you offered to buy him another he refused absolutely offended that you even offered in the first place.

"Pink is punk. You think I'm getting rid of it now?Come off it." You chuckled at the memory.

After your shower you finish getting ready for the day. The final task that you had left was your hair. You applied a light oil to your hands and got to work. You had to unravel all of the twists that Hobie had done only a couple days before. After you finished you look yourself over in the mirror, make some final adjustments, pop on your black ring, and head out.

Immediately you are met with the smells of onion, chilis, and various spices. Hobie must've made that one dish again. When you arrived in the dining room you had found that you were right. Alongside the rice and beignets you made you find a mock ackee and saltfish that he makes with eggs, as well as bacon on your plate. You mentally cheer and sit down. Hobie smiles.

"I've been waiting ages for you to get out. Almost checked to see if you were alright."

You scoff and roll your eyes. "Bie, hush."

Grabbing your fork you dig into your plate. The first bite in and a whirlwind of delicious flavors hit your taste buds. You set your fork down and stare at him. A few years ago you couldn't ever imagine something like this. A familiar warmth and a shared meal with someone who cared for you.

"Bug, is something wrong?" He looked at you worriedly. "The food's good init?"

You nodded and smiled.

"Yeah." You pick back up your fork. "It's absolutely delicious."

A/N: Was this rushed? Most definitely. Do I have any regrets? No. I love this sm and if you don't go kick rocks (this is a joke).

I debated on whether I'd do shared rooms or separate but it is what it is. I stole the bonnet hc from @/murdrdocs.

Fun fact a black ring on your middle finger is supposed to be a subtle sign for asexuality if you didn't know. (I have a black and a white one.) Also i'm Creole not Jamaican so forgive me if I got something wrong here. Finally, beignets are heavenly and I'd eat them all day if not for my gluten intolerance.

[ohmyplasticstars]

The Angusing be upon ye:

He has the world's biggest sweet tooth, you can persuade him with a cake or a candy (his fave are those strawberry camdies filled with jelly)

Prefers to fight with objects, brass knuckles and handguns to be exact. (And his cane too /hj)

Losing his Italian accent, but still talks with his hand 🤌

Roman and Albertsky hate his guts, because he's looks kinda sketchy and also for some... pretty upsetting reasons (it's the 50s) :/

He and Mia enable eachother's highly expensive and dangerous escapades (they almost blew through 10 grand on shopping and betting)

Bro hates American food, much rather makes his own meals or goes to the restaurant Nacha works at when she's behind the line.

Has met Abducius ONCE, almost died DX

Partially out of the closet (hes bi), only immediate friends are aware/knows (jokes on him almost the whole building/his work knows)

Gets VERY heated about the Americanization of Italian food, he has ranted to Nacha on multiple occasions about how her restaurant makes most things wrong.

He wears exclusively argile socks, all in funky fun colors.

His room is super comfy, never turns his overhead lighting on and much prefers candles and lamps. If he has to use over heads, he has a swanky ass chandelier thats he "acquired". His room is various shades of baby blue and lavender, lotta dark wood furniture. It smells like lavender, vanilla, and cigarettes in there.

He's SUPER clean too, spends his weekends deep cleaning everything (he has gone out drinking with friends smelling like cleaners)

He owns 5 pairs of the same suit, only outliers are a black suit with gray pinstripes for funerals and a cream suits with brown pinstripes for weddings. Bro loves pinstripes.

He can't drive very well, prefers to do public transport or walks (only if his destination is close enough so he isn't in pain)

Erm, yeagh, thats all for now <3

I have no idea why I didn't check this damn

Love the hcs he's so princess fr won't let the dopples stop him from living comfily if only he could add therapy without getting lobotomised or something

But 10/10 head canons Angus is very layered in your hcs like onion as a certain green person would say

[rebornologist]

♡ Misc. Varia Headcanons ✧ 2 of 2

I'm finally finishing what I started.

♡ Xanxus smells like whisky in a wood smoked glass, a recently snuffed candle, leather, iron, and pomade.

He has really fast metabolism, which is why he seems to always be hungry. Just as quickly as he gets tipsy off of a few drinks, him standing around, drinking some water, or eating something tends to make him sober up. He's built up some impressive tolerance for alcohol through the years and would absolutely body a drinking contest if he ever stooped to such a level.

He likes a lot of cracked black pepper in his steak and isn't as much of a fan of garlic and onions. He appreciates herby notes like thyme, bay leaves, and rosemary, especially with a gamey meat like lamb. He hates vegetables. Partially because he's a hypermasculine weirdo, and partially because they leave him hungry soon after eating, and he just gets ridiculously hangry.

Speaking of hangry, it's because he often suffered from hunger pains as a child. His mother was not well-off, and they only had just enough to get by. That changed when he was taken in by Timoteo. He doesn't remember much of his time with his birth mother because he was so young, but the pain of a ghrelin spike just makes him feel absolutely awful and sets him off.

Xanxus isn't a huge desserts guy but appreciates a good chocolate mousse or a homemade flan. He has a soft spot for a very boozy tiramisu. He learned the base recipe from Timoteo, but the extra rum is his own personal touch. He doesn't drink coffee (it makes his hands shake and it bothers him a lot) but will tolerate it when it's in dessert.

୨୧ ⁺˳₊

♡ Mammon smells like dust, an incoming thunderstorm, baby powder, and refrigerant. They use mild, unscented, sensitive (baby) soap by choice, because it's cheap and it works.

They enjoy playing mahjong because of the sensory component. Cards comes close in second, but they aren't as good at cards and unwilling it gamble with cards as much as they do with mahjong. It's pretty easy for an illusionist to create multiplier tiles out of nothing, so they’re somewhat of a mahjong master.

Mammon gets more easily stressed than they let on. They always have a million thoughts running through their mind, and they are fairly bad at mindfulness or meditation, surprisingly. Their vivid visualization abilities make it extremely difficult to clear their mind. They are prone of stress nightmares, and do not sleep as much as they should as a result. They absolutely are a night owl and make up for it through occasional midday naps.

୨୧ ⁺˳₊

♡ Squalo is a fairly good driver, never mind the road rage and always being in a rush. I didn't say he wasn't reckless, but he has fast reaction speed and knows how to handle his vehicle on the road. He prefers manual to automatic transmission and was caught off guard by the automatic cars that were popular in Japan. He would catch himself habitually moving his foot to the nonexistent clutch, or trying to pull the stick in a way that it simply wouldn't go. Anyone pointing that out will just piss him off and he will drive even more aggressively.

He always eats just enough to sustain himself and supply his body with the energy to build the muscle he needs, almost with efficiency as more of a priority than enjoying the food. A result of the fast pace, physical demands, and immense pressures of his work. He also has a fast metabolism, so he's always been fairly lean, but he runs cold. Something about the long limbs and poor circulation. He appreciates a good hearty soup and misses the cooking from his childhood no matter how much he tries to deny himself that yearning.

Squalo definitely gives "grew up too fast", in part through his family's expectations on him, and himself being extremely ambitious in his youth and choosing to fly the coop and shoulder so much more than the average teenage boy. He chose to pursue the sword and made the bold decision to dedicate his life to it from early on. He does not regret it one bit, but it comes up in times of high stress. Sometimes he almost wishes that he could be as emotionally unhinged as Xanxus, and to just be irresponsible and destructive when overwhelmed by emotions... but someone has to be collected enough to lead around here.

Not to get off topic here, but I really don't feel right thinking and writing about Xanxus going hungry as a child without thinking about children who are starving in real life.

I know this is just a fandom blog, but I cannot post this without flagging this post for d0nation matches to people currently having their food, water, families, homes, land, and lives taken from them. Sorry to end on something so grim, but if y'all want to support my blog, please support what I care about as a human being. From river to sea,

[owliellder]

I LOVED THE RACCOON!HYBRID ART SM!!

I wanted to chip into the op anon- Raccoon!Hybrid who sleeps during the day in theirs and Leon's closet- They made it like a den with pillows and blankets so they can actually have a dark place to rest

Also, Raccoon!Hybrid who is sensitive to smells (Raccoons hate hot peppers, garlic, peppermint oil, onion, and epsom salt???) So imagine Leon cooking with something like Garlic and he just hears one of the windows open and reader is hung halfway out, inhaling the fresh air- Their tail is just deflated and everything

god i'm learning so much about raccoons lately.

it's probably hard for reader to explain at first why exactly they can't stand when Leon cooks savory foods cause he seems so upset that reader's that bothered by his cooking :'(

and i feel like almost any hybrid! reader would have some form of attachment to Leon's clothes since that sense of smell is usually bonkers being half animal.

one of my family's dog, Avery, will actually do this very thing by toppling any laundry basket when no one's home to chill inside.

actual photo evidence of her in precarious situations from 2018/2019:

[iixarche]

OC Deep Dive !!

tagged by @dssystemwriting thanks brother

Here's Yín Fēng Swan !!

Quick Summary: He is a Danganronpa OC, and the Ultimate Meteorologist. He's 3/4 Chinese and 1/4 white, hence the surname. Yín Fēng is a trans man, but doesn't really care about still being feminine. He was very bad dissociative episodes and is a chronic maladaptive daydreamer. He talks to angels.

What uncommon/common fear do they have?

That the angels he talks to will one day betray him.

Do they have any pet peeves?

People who give him the cold shoulder, or don't have any personal awareness.

What are 3 items you can find in their bedroom?

Many snowglobes, pretty scrapbooks, and looots of string lights

What do they notice first in a person?

Colors. He likes assigning colors to the people he knows. Hair, skin, fashion palette, etc.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high is their pain tolerance?

like a 4. can handle some aches from too much activity but much else WILL make him cry.

Do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure?

Flight

Do they come from a big family/are they a family person?

Kind of big family, but Yín Fēng doesn't talk to them much. He moves across the country from his extended family at around 11, and moved far from his parents at 18, so....... yeah. oops.

What animal represents them best?

S Ss Sww s swwaaaaan. swan. who wouldve guessed

What is a smell that they dislike?

Gasoline, smoke, etc etc. dirty smells.

Have they broken any bones?

Nope ! 23 and still going strong!!!

How would a stranger likely describe them?

...Strange? Not bad but he's a little....... yyknow. weird.

Are they a night owl or a morning bird?

complete morning bird. the second the sun is up, he's up. although in the winter he wakes up unnaturally early, around four or five am, and just. stares out the window.

What is a flavor they hate and a flavor they love?

he looooves raw egg yolks, and hates the taste of onions. he'll still eat them, but if he can taste them, hes pulling them out of the dish.

Do they have any hobbies?

Scrapbooking!!! not of his life, but kind of... an ideal one. He also somewhat accidentally collects a lot of trinkets.

Boom, surprise birthday party!

AH..! Oh, um. Y-You guys didn't. Have to do this...

How do they react to surprises?

Kind of badly..!

Do they like to wear jewelry?

Lots! Not an excessive amount, but every put together outfit will have a nice selection of necklace, earrings, and bangles.

Do they have neat or messy handwriting?

He has a decently messy scrawl, very tall writing. But if he focuses he can get really smooth and loopy cursive.

What are the two emotions they feel the most?

Confusion and isolation.

Do they have a favorite fabric?

No but he does have a preferred color palette, if it wasn't terribly obvious. Hardly any warm colors in this guy's closet.

What kind of accent do they have?

Despite both of his parents being fluent in Chinese, Yín Fēng knows almost none. His accent is very floaty and almost slurred sometimes, but when he's more alert he. Definitely sounds like he's from California.

And there we go..! Yín Fēng Swan is genuinely one of my favorite OCs at the moment. Has been just about since I created him!! I hope you guys like him too.

(And i fucking hate tag games (/silly) so i wont be tagging anyone else but feel free to do it as well!)

[83tu]

get to know mitsu pt. 1

i hit 20 answers on bsky so

1. fave beverage? non alc is full sugar strawberry / lychee milk or tiger milk tea boba, extra caffeine if she can get it alc is peach sake jelly shots

2. fave flavor? sweet sweet SWEET, she despises sour and bitter and can eat spicy but claims it hurts her mouth

3. fave food? green onion potato chips, oyakodon, shishamo, cherry garcia ice cream. frankly she eats almost everything and has a very strong stomach and can be paid to eat weird things

4. dessert (parfaits) > snacks > breakfast (pastries) > dinner > lunch every meal must also have a corresponding dessert if she can manage it

5. hated flavor / food? bitter and sour are on mitsus no go list, she can't stand it (umeboshi is a rare exception, as are limes) she also won't touch most raw vegetables. she'll throw the plate if her meal has green pepper in it

6. tolerate spicy food? to an extent. probably better than shy, but compared to a lot of others she knows, she comes across as a massive baby about it. it also depends on the spice, like wasabi and ginger dont bother her but chili peppers do

7. fave animal? small, purse sized, conventionally cute ones. rabbits, lap dogs, hamsters and etc? but shes actually Not into cats like at all, they piss her off when she can't get their attention. she'd have a pomeranian and name it 'gucci' or 'princess' 100%

8. what do they wear to bed? teeny ass pjs (always a cropped top and shorts), lingerie or absolutely nothing she varies from this mostly only if she's sick and then she steals shy or wrens clothes

9. what position do they sleep in? on her stomach typically, and her 4'9" ass can 100% manage to take up the majority of a california king despite being teeny tiny because she surrounds herself in every pillow and then kicks them away through the course of the night

10. morning person or night owl? honestly neither? she'll wake up midday and then still conk out at like 2 AM max while shy is still full steam going and then repeat the process again (she's only seen shy sleeping a handful of times which is more than 100% of other people whove never seen it)

12. its a rainy day, what do they do inside? if shys there? bang no shy? online shopping, reality tv and ordering so much doordash because she can't cook a single thing and also she thinks it's funny people would have bring her things in the rain (she tips like $1, idk how shes not blacklisted)

13. fave scent or smell? ooo, this is a good question... probably something sugary, like a fresh baked donut or cookies? also shys cologne which is something very high priced and mellow. also strawberry shampoo.

14. what do they smell like? hmm... this a tough one. something soft and sweet, her fave scents are the same sorts of things she likes to wear (for herself or when she goes out, she won't at home because shys not a fan) she REALLY avoids floral though

15. baths or showers? baths! *slaps the vanity mirror* this bad boy can hold so many bath bombs and fizzers

16. how good are they at cooking? nightmare levels bad despite the desire to also be the picturesque tiktok trophy wife aesthetic online. burns water levels of bad. if u watch a clip of her cooking a beautiful meal on insta just know it was majorly faked and edited and NOT cooked by her

17. fave time of year? why? mitsu loves summer actually because shes a huge fan of shorts and swimming / "sunbathing"* / just laying around in her bikini by the side of the pool (not the beach, beach has too much sand) * she doesnt actually lay in the sun and she wears a fuckton of sunscreen

18. fave holiday? valentines!!! not ONLY is it her birthday but it's also just soooo romantic and one of the holidays shy is willing to go all out on (lowkey cause it's a 2 in 1)

19. prefer to buy or recieve gifts? recieve, I dont think she's bought a single person a gift in years without prompting. she had to be reminded that yes you /should/ bring a gift to your bffs wedding because that is your FRIEND admittedly tho she does "treat" people a lot cause she loves going out

20. how tall are they? how do they feel about it? ~ 4'9" mitsu loves being this short, it makes everyone underestimate her and treat her like shes feeble or weak. she uses that to her advantage constantly. this height also makes her and shys height gap SO tall and thats her kink

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #248

What movie are you looking forward to? The Mufasa movie.

What was your horoscope today? Was it accurate? I don't give a rat's ass what my horoscope is, I'm not even checking. I'm sorry, I think astrology is one of the dumbest things people believe in.

What’s the biggest thing you have going on? Uh... nothing lmfao.

Do you keep magazines by your toilet? No.

What did you last take a picture of with your camera? My actual DSLR camera, a pretty stream with nice trees and boulders. I took it close to a week ago and I'm so scared to put it into Lightroom. I haven't worked on a picture in literally a year now and I'm so scared I'm going to hate it.

Would you prefer an ice cream sundae or an ice cream cone? Cone.

Do you like to have ice in your drinks? No, it waters down whatever I'm drinking.

What song are you most likely to sing in the shower? I don't sing in the shower, or almost ever.

When was the last time you went to the dentist? I think it was actually like two months ago.

What’s your favorite TV show? Meerkat Manor is my favorite of all time.

Would you ever have sex with the last person you texted? The last person I texted with my mom. You can properly guess my answer to that.

How old were you when you had the chicken pox? I actually never got chicken pox.

Ever had a friend named Alex or John? Alex, yes.

What type of music do you listen to the most? Metal or rock of some sort.

Have you ever had to get braces? Yes, I had braces for a long time.

Are you happy with your relationship status? I am.

Which one: chocolate chip or sugar cookie? Chocolate chip.

Do you like the smell of gasoline? Why or why not? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I hate it. It just doesn't smell good in general to me, and it gives me a headache.

Do you like the color orange? Is it your favorite? I do like orange, but it's not my favorite.

What kind of stuff do you like on your hot dogs? Ketchup and mustard. I can handle a tiny bit of finely diced onions.

What’s the largest animal you’ve ever had as a pet? Probably our old boxer mix named Cali.

Do you own any kind of helmet? No.

Out of everything currently in your refrigerator, what food or drink is your favorite? Mountain Lightning. Mom got a 24 pack and I wish she hadn't, I don't like having soda always available to me.

Were your grandparents present when you were born? Not to my knowledge, they didn't even live in the same state as us.

Do you own any jewelry containing your birthstone? No.

Did you cry when you first watched Titanic? I sure did lol, but I was also in a psych hospital when they let us watch it, so I was ALREADY emotionally compromised. Even without that though, I probably woulda still cried.

Ever kissed someone with a tongue piercing? No, but *I* used to have a tongue ring.

Are your parents divorced? Yes.

If you got kicked out, where would you go? I guess my dad's or Girt's.

If any of your friends got kicked out, would your parents let them stay with you? I think it would depend on how close we are and if they had their own income. Mom can barely get herself and me by.

Would you get your feet tattooed? I think I'm getting ONE foot tattoo, a Silent Hill 4 reference that is a pair of numbers carved into the skin. I'm not certain yet though, I don't tend to like foot tats much.

Do you know people that smoke weed? I'd say this is pretty normal these days, yes. It's not legal here (yet, hopefully one day), but yes.

What is/was your worst subject in school? All types of math.

Do you find it rude when people text when they’re talking to you? Yes.

Ever seen a pregnant woman smoking/drinking? Yes, which I think is dumb as fuck if you actually WANT to deliver a baby, a baby that's healthy.

What’s something you want for your next birthday? I think I'm going to try to convince Mom to let me get a velvet spider... I talked to her about it once and she wasn't for it, BUT she honestly seemed convincable about THAT kind of spider, if I try hard enough lmfao.

Have you ever clogged a public toilet? I don't think so?

Have you ever been followed by a stranger when walking home? Tbh I've never "walked" home anywhere.

Do you own more then 50 different colored eye shadows? Dude I think I own ONE thing of eye shadow.

Do you currently have any medicine in your bag/purse/etc? If so, what kind? Yes, I keep Klonopin in there for anxiety attacks.

What do you like on your pasta/noodles? Sauce, butter, grated cheese, etc.? Spaghetti sauce is a must, I also like meatballs with it.

Do you think it’s wrong to put yourself before others? In what sort of situations? No. You can't care for others if you don't care for yourself. I mean yes, there are different situations, but honestly I don't care enough right now to divulge into different possibilities.

Are you wary of displaying signs of affection for your significant other around adults? Why or why not? No. I've been with him over three years, there's zero embarrassment or hesitance in me loving him.

Have you ever had red velvet cake or carrot cake? Have you ever made either of those? I've had both but made neither myself. Red velvet is one of my favorites.

Has your favorite band/artist ever toured Europe? Literally both of my favorite bands originate from Europe, so obviously lol.

Is the room you’re in carpeted or is it a hard wood floor? Are there any rugs? Carpeted.

What would be worse - going out in public with no bra or no panties? I think this is a personal opinion, but *I'd* be less comfortable without a bra in public. In private, I never wear one, but I'm very large-chested and would be very self-conscious publicly without one.

If you had to change a tire right now, would you know how? Nope.

Would you ever let your child drop out of high school? I don't want children, but if I did have a child and their mental health really, genuinely suffered because of school, I'd let them drop out, but never because they "just wanted" to.

Honestly, do you think that inner beauty is as important as outer beauty? Inner beauty is astronomically more important than what you look like on the outside.

What is something you used to be afraid of, but aren’t anymore? Taking the last person's answer, spiders. I love them now.

Privacy and respect; which is more important to you? You know, I originally answered with respect, but I actually think I'd rather have a right to privacy than you respect me.

Do you pronounce “aunt” like “awnt” or “ant”? "Ant."

Do you find not washing your hands after using the bathroom to be gross? I mean, yes? I think everyone would agree to this.

Are you an official couple with the last person you kissed? Yes.

Looking back, did you ever think you would be where you are now? No, especially if you're talking to child/young teen me. I expected to be so much more.

How old do you think you will be when you finally have kids? I'm not having kids. I wish I was infertile literally now.

Do you think you’ll be married in ten years? I think so.

Does your ex still love/like you? No ex loves/likes me. There's maybe two that I'm sure are indifferent, but I can confidently say one hates me and another doesn't want to associate so I'm sure doesn't like me. Maybe by now he's indifferent, idk.

Are you stubborn? Yes.

Do you tend to hold a grudge? It really depends on our personal relationship.

How many states have you lived in? Only North Carolina.

Who was the last person to hold your hand? Girt.

What do you miss most about your ex? "The" ex, I think I'll always miss that he was a lot more romantic than Girt is. He was, in some ways, better at being a boyfriend by my expectations, but in Girt's defense, Jason also very much lacked in other contexts.

What’s a fact about the last person you kissed? His favorite game is Nier.

How long have you liked the person you like? Confidently, it's been close to three years. I wondered since I was a teenager, but I was never sure, even when we started dating the second time. It took a major, trauma-healing event to be certain.

Have you ever regretted kissing someone? Yes, I did it because I felt like I was supposed to. I had no romantic interest in him.

Are you faster at text messaging or typing on the computer? TYPING, I tend to make typos when texting on a phone. I wonder if it's because of my hand tremors.

Tongue piercings - cute or trashy? I've literally had a tongue piercing and it was my favorite piercing I ever had, I thought it was so damn cute. I only took it out because it was damaging my teeth.

I’ve got to know, who do you prefer: Mario or Luigi? Luigi.

Have you ever changed clothes in a public area (not a dressing room)? In a car.

Yes or no: techno music? I tend to like it.

Have you ever kissed anybody who had a mustache? Not a big one, but yes.

If you were famous do you think you could handle the popularity? Absolutely not.

Do you get on better with funny or serious people? Funny.

Have your friends met the last person you kissed? Some old high school friends have because we went to the same school.

How old is your oldest cousin? Idk.

What if you saw your best friend holding hands with your ex? My boyfriend is my best friend and all but one of my exes are men and he's straight, so what a scene lmao.

Your last relationship, who dumped who? She dumped me. I'm honestly just glad it didn't last, she's not the kind of person I ever SHOULD have dated.

How old were you when you had your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Idk actual age, but I know I was in the 7th grade.

Is your home town nice? No.

Do you consider yourself mature enough to make your own decisions? It's not even a matter of maturity to me, it's me not trusting myself or even just not knowing what I want.

Do you have trouble reading small fonts? Not really, but I do have more trouble than I used to.

Do you know anybody that believes that magic/witchery truly exists? Yes.

Excluding surveys, what is something you waste a lot of time doing? Watching YouTube.

Do you find watching animals in their natural habitat to be exciting & fascinating? YES!!!!!

Of all the decisions you have thus far made in your life, which was the best & which was the worst? Best: letting go of Jason and deciding I could live without him. Worst: I can't think of a single event that REALLY stands out. I could say attempting to kill myself, but it's like... that led to me getting the help I desperately needed. Real healing started THAT month. I can think of awful mistakes I made, but picking one that stands out furthest is hard. A lot of things that caused trouble in my life weren't a choice.

Will you be expecting any company tomorrow? No.

Discarding the fact that they can smell & tend to get dirty a lot, do you like your feet, or feet in general? No, I hate feet, including mine.

What has been your best/favourite Halloween costume? I have no idea.

If you could visit just one European country next week, where would you go? GERMANY

What was the last job interview you went to? For a Food Lion deli. I got the job, which was a massive fuckin' mistake :^)

Have you ever had a meal kit subscription like Hello Fresh? No.

What colour are your nails right now? I don't paint my nails.

Are you good at meditating? No, I can't clear my mind like that and all it causes is anxiety trying to quiet my brain.

Can you do a pull-up? What about a push-up? Absolutely not to both.

Have you ever been fired from a job? Did you think it was fair? No, I've never really worked anywhere long enough for this...

Do you have any furniture from IKEA? I doubt it. Most of the furniture in this house came with it, the previous owner died.

Are you listening to anything now? Yes, "Moskau" by Rammstein.

Do you like to play Jenga? No, it actually stresses me out. I don't like the tension and especially the sound when everything falls.

Do you like gardening? I've never actually tried gardening. In my ideal life, I'd like some with fruits, but realistically, I would never maintain one.

If you have a dog, does it sleep with you? She's Mom's dog, and she sleeps with her or on the living room couch.

Do you like Fresca? It's okay, but low on my list for sodas. My mom used to love them.

Would you rather your middle name be your first? No.

If you get married, who would cook? Look can I be fuckin real, I hate thinking about this lmfao. I don't know how to cook, and Girt's no expert either, but he's better than me. Girt likes meal subscription services though, but he stopped a while ago. Tbfh, I don't even know how he eats now. The most realistic situation of us living together would probably include me cooking easy things, like in an air fryer or microwave; it looks likely I won't be a worker, which Girt has reassured me he's completely fine with, and because he'd be working, it's not like I'm just gonna laze around at the house all day. I have to pull my weight too, so the way things look right now, I'm probably going to be a housewife. Employment hasn't exactly worked for me, but I'm not happy about that at all.

Would you name your child after someone you know? No.

Have you ever been on a cruise? No.

What celebrity do you get told you look like? I've never been compared to a celebrity.

Have you ever taken a Vicodin? I suppose it's possible?

Are you a vegetarian? I had a vegetarian phase, but it's not sustainable for me and my diet. I'm far, far too picky, and if I followed vegetarianism for an extended period, I'd be malnourished.

How many towels do you use after a shower? One.

Would you smoke marijuana if it were legal? No, I'm not interested in smoking anything. I'd try edibles if it was legal here, though. I'm curious how it would affect my anxiety and depression.

Are you easily embarrassed? YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Would you ever flash a cop if you knew you'd get out of a ticket? No.

[herbalyeen]

What a food you thought you wouldn’t like at first but like now. or the reverse of the question

A food I thought I’d hate is onions but I’m addicted to them, and will eat them with almost anything. And that’s not an exaggeration, I’ll grill them and mix them with any meat I make, my scrambled eggs, my rice/chicken potsticker meal I make often, or even eat them raw with burgers, tacos, fajitas- fuck it I’ll snack on a slice of fuckin onion just cuz 😭 I like them so much- I always want extra too. And bc of it I’m immune to cutting them and stuff, I don’t feel any sense of burning or smell because I use them CONSTANTLY.

[aurumjank]

What are your five favorite fanfics? Do you read fics from other fandoms? If so, which ones?

What is your favorite type of weather?

Do you have a favorite genre of books?

Do you have any pets? If not, what type would you like to have if you could?

If you came to a sleepover, what would be the most unusual item you would bring with you?

If you could travel anywhere on Earth safely, where would you visit?

What is one food you love and one you cannot stand?

Sorry for the wait, I'm finally answering.

1. It's hard to choose just five... I mean, just your works are going to take up all five spots and it still won't be enough 😂 Lately, I started downloading works I love so much I wouldn't want to lose if something happens. And there's 182 stories just in Glee fandom in my downloads. Also, yes, I do read other fandoms. Only Teen Wolf right now though.

So, I'm going to try and choose five favourite short stories (meaning less than 2000 words, because otherwise it's too much and I can't choose anything) from Glee that I reread the most.

A world to rediscover by hundredindecisions

Chocolate-covered dork by JWMelmoth (this and other Kadam short stories, like Going up and Help wanted)

High heeled shoes by DanaNick82 (there's also the whole series of Glee drabbles by this author that I love)

Warriors by Believs(EnbyNeti)

What are brothers for? by daftydraw

There are also 2000-5000 words list:

A venti of prevention by elledelajoie (which, by the way, LOVE the word play in the name)

A day in life by CriminalGleePotter (I love the first chapter with the film, it's just... delicious)

Birds of a feather by SilverGrayAndMauve

The one who waits by deliriumbubbles

The Poltergeist by vcg73

Yeah, okay. I'll stop myself here. Or else there's going to be a list of all 182 favourites 😅

2. I love any kind of weather as long as I'm not going outside. Otherwise, the perfect weather for me is around 22-25°C, sunny but not hot, and with a light wind. And when it's just after the rain, so the air still smells fresh, like earth and wet asphalt.

3. I love fantasy books, mystery and adventure. If it's all three in one - perfect!

4. I don't have any pets, but my sister and her boyfriend got themselves a cat, and now I'm a proud auntie 😌💜 I would like to have a cat myself, though.

5. Hmmm... Does my knitting count? When I go to my friends overnight, I usually don't take a lot of stuff, and this is the most unusual thing I take with me.

6. Anywhere! Everywhere around the world! Or, I wish I could say that, but I do realise that I'm more of a stay-at-home person. I want to see the world, but I hate going to any kind of new places by myself. Though, if we're talking about SAFE travel anywhere, then I would visit my grandma in Ukraine. I haven't seen her in person since the summer of 2021 and at this point I already lived in Poland for almost 4 years.

7. I love meat. Any kind of meat: beef, pork, chicken, rabbit, turkey, quail, duck etc. I almost perfected my meat cooking skills to 100% and now I can do pretty much anything: soups, stews, goulash, fried, grilled, baked, with vegetables or by itself, with different sauces.

One thing I can't stand though are any kind of cooked onions. If they're not fresh I can't eat them. Not steamed, or fried, or in any dish. No. Just no.

Thanks for the ask and sorry for the long wait 💜

[pussypopstiel]

My eating issues rant under the cut 👍🏼

Ever since i got covid and it effected my taste and stuff i basically take almost no enjoyment in food. Like ive never been much of a foodie and have always had issues with eating- but its like now theres very little to no real enjoyment in anything i eat. Eating is more a chore now than it has ever been before in my life, and with a lifetime of eating issues due to autism and sensory sensitivity- it just feels like the final nail in the coffin. I cant tolerate onion-y smells and tastes and i can barely tolerate garlic in most foods. Almost everything i use to enjoy is so unenjoyable to me now and i only eat it because its the most bearable option out of things i hate eating. Every day choosing what to eat, making it, and actually eating it is such a chore i can barely muster up enough willpower to eat like 2 meals a day. It seems like such a non-issue on the outside and really i shouldnt be complaining because im lucky enough to Have food and to Have options on what to eat when so many peoole dont but it just makes day to day life so depressing and dreadful and its genuinely exhausting. Most of the time id just rather go hungry than have to think of what i want to eat and i dont know if its gonna get better or if im just stuck like this and its so painfully depressing i dont know im just ranting

[lumiereandcogsworth]

💛Smoshblr December Asks Day 15💙

What are your top 3 comfort foods? 🤗

And which 3 foods to you try to avoid at all costs? (aka how could Garrett completely ruin your day if you were on eioyi 🤢)

oops i got behind!!! my autistic ass is ready for this question though. i LIVE by clinging to comfort food and avoiding others like the plague

comfort foods

english muffin breakfast sandwich, i make it almost every day and it’s very much a part of my routine. the process of making it is very soothing and comforting to me too

apple or pear slices in the evening. usually my late night snack while i watch smosh vids instead of going to bed lol

cheese & crackers. has truly been my comfort food since i was a child. i used to shred the cheese and then put little piles on the crackers but these days i just take sliced cheese and break it into specific squares and then get the exact number of crackers on my plate so that the numbers match perfectly and i have one bit of cheese for every cracker. you know, like one does.

HOW WOULD GARRETT RUIN MY DAY. no for real though i think about that all the time like i just COULD NOT be on eat it or yeet it. i am so so so picky and hate so many textures and smells and flavors like it literally just couldn’t happen afjdjf. but anyway, three things i despise:

bell peppers. the smell alone i just cannot even stand it. BLEGH.

tomatoes. i can do sauce, like for pasta and pizza, that’s fine. but beyond that?? no absolutely not. ESPECIALLY NO CHUNKS IN THE SAUCE. but just the taste alone is not good to me. too weirdly sweet for being involved in savory meals.

onions. people loooooovvveee chopping up onions and putting them in stuff and ruining my daayyyy. THE TEXTURE IS WEIRD!!!!!! i will say though my mom has managed to dice an onion into tiny enough pieces that i didn’t notice it in a meal before. so you CAN get away with it, but you gotta have the autistic precision of my mother in the kitchen 🔪