#and i don't know if this is star trek-y enough to count

[gingersforeverbox]

Coffee and revelations

A/n: I'm not gonna lie y'all, this piece was hard for me and offered a new challenge, but I finally got it done! I honestly don't know if I will keep doing platonic requests, so please consider this my first and possibly my last. Anyways, thank you for the patience, and I hope y'all enjoy. Word count: 2.1k

warnings: panic attacks, formerly toxic home-life, canon-typical swearing and technology, and Nathan ofc

How you got the position of being the assistant of a multibillionaire ‘tech messiah’ (Nathan’s words, not yours) is routinely up to debate, but the best and most plausible answer is that you are the only one in a long list of assistants that was actually able to put up with said messiah for more than a month or two.

 Your first weeks out in the middle of nowhere deep in the forests of Alaska were… rough to say the least. It was a constant barrage of papers and virtual conferences, emails and phone calls, and of course a boss that didn’t necessarily hover over your shoulder so much as he simply reminded you of his eternal presence using the over-coms and cameras. Thankfully there was only one or two in your room that you quickly dismantled using a handy-dandy pocket knife that was spare from the helicopter on the two and a half hour ride to the drop off point. Why Nathan insisted on being so dangerously isolated from people, you’ve yet to fully uncover. You had your theories of course, most likely something to do with the brains of the man, along with a splash of gifted kid problems that you’d recognized in others your age before you moved out to be surrounded by nature, Nathan, and the machines he cooks up in his labs. 

Over time, you began seeing Nathan for who he was: a troubled man who is too smart for his own good. Yet the urge to call this man ‘Dad’ infects you everyday, whether it's when you’re asking for your next assignment or explaining your stance on why Star Trek was so important to the influence of modern technology. He was just oddly comforting to be around when he was being decent and not a total asshat. Some people may insist that they aren’t cut out for parenting, and that may be true for some, but Nathan comes by it almost naturally. Even if he may still consider girls to be odd creatures, he still respects the fact that you’re just some teen who happened to get stuck with him while furthering your career. 

Deep down, Nathan knows that he has a soft spot for his young assistant. He can tell in moments of pride for you and your work, or when you actually beat him in an argument, or even when you silently leave him a glass of water and a pain killer at his desk for his hangover the morning after his drinking episodes. He knows he’s not the best boss or role model, but he appreciates your time and presence more than he cares to admit.

With the buzz of the over-coms, Nathan’s tired voice comes alive in your windowless  room. 

“Y/n. Coffee. Stat,” he demands bluntly.

You grumble as you slide off the bed, something about being capable of holding meetings in other countries on behalf of the sarcastic grump of a man only to be interrupted by a snarky ‘What was that?’ to float through the room. 

“On my way,” you sigh just loud enough for the microphone(s) to pick up.

Kyoko is silent as usual when you pass her in the hallway, on the way to the kitchen for the coffee that was already filling from the prepped machine. 

She always puts you on edge. You logically know that she is just an extremely fancy AI that Nathan had made at some point in his isolation, but she just seemed so damn real. She looked just like a normal- albeit very beautiful- woman, perfect down to the real hairs on her head that Nathan had claimed to place individually while building her. Due to that being one of the first things that Nathan had ever said to you when you came to the facility, you could never quite tell if he was being serious or not, but you wouldn’t put it past him to be so meticulous with “his things”. 

Whilst distracted by the slender form of the AI as you round the corner of the kitchen counter, your depth perception fails you, and causes you to stub your toe and trip around the corner. 

With a tumble, your body falls in slow motion. A short gasp leaves your throat as you watch the mug of coffee shatter into pieces and chunks, coffee splattering across the tiles of the facility.

Despite being alright from the fall, something snaps in the back of your mind. It’s like a dam of worries and fear over the response of your gruff boss, cracks- pouring out, along with the tears that sting your eyes. 

You’re unaware of how long you lay on the floor of the kitchen, alone… until you aren’t. 

“Hey, woah woah woah, kid, you okay?” Nathan questions as he stoops down to gather your arms and inspect them for glass. Your eyes are glassy with tears as your limp arms are turned and prodded by Nathan's surprisingly warm hands. 

“I’m so sorry, I was just trying to get your coffee, I promise I-” your words fell out of your mouth despite your throat tightening, desperately trying to choke down your tears. The cries soon turned into short and shallow breaths, panic seeping into your bones as the stress of Nathan being upset with you began to bare down on your shoulders. 

“Hey, stop breathing like that kid, you’re hyperventilating.” Nathan slowly moves his hands to your shoulders, trying to ground you to reality and prevent you from spiraling. Nathan’s solid hands gently squeeze in a slow pulsing rhythm before he slides his hands back down your arms and softly folds them over your chest like a mummy in a sarcophagus. 

“Can you start patting your chest with your hands one at a time for me, kid?” Nathan mirrors you with a neutral expression then demonstrates exactly what he wants you to do with a small nod of encouragement. As you watch the man gently pat his chest with his hands folded upright, you slowly begin to get in sync with his demonstration, your breath slowly becoming more regulated. Your mind, however, still felt like it was reeling. The feeling of your heart rate calming down was only a small comfort whilst overanalyzing the situation- particularly Nathan’s response. 

‘Why is he staring like that? Does he always look like that or is something different? He thinks I’m a disappointment, why can’t I just do what he wants? It’s just like home all over again, I’m so tired. I just want him to approve, that’s all I-’

“Hey,” he interrupts gently. “Stop thinking for a minute, everything is going to be fine. It was an accident, it’s just a cup.” Nathan continues to show the soft patting motion he is guiding you through, although a twinge of worry flares in his dark eyes. Noticing that the self soothing isn’t helping as much as anticipated, he opts for a different approach. 

As you sit silently, chaos reigning above all else in your mind, you feel soft arms wrap around your shoulders; Nathan quietly pulls you into his chest whilst making a rocking motion a few paces away from the glass filled area. 

“Are you physically hurt, Y/n?” 

A small shake of your head is felt against his chest where your head is resting softly, a soothing hand petting the back of your head. With a small sigh of relief, Nathan softly pulls you away for a moment to check your face for any deception, pleased to find none. 

“As long as you’re not hurt, that’s what matters, okay?” He states with his typical stone expression as he waits for confirmation that you understand him.

Tears well up in your eyes once more as you quietly nod up to the man who then pulls you back into his warm embrace without a word. 

“Thank you, dad.” 

Shocked at your sudden revelation of your image of him, he feels a new emotion wiggling under his chest. It felt warm and tingly inside, a feeling that Nathan quickly identifies as pride, along with something new: paternal affection. He always knew that he wouldn’t have children any time soon (unless it’s one of the nights where he is drunk and thinking about the possibility that he has a child somewhere in the world due to his relations with various women), yet in that moment the truth becomes glaringly obvious. 

He got a kid the first time you stepped foot in the facility.The first time you impressed him with your efficiency in your work. The first time you went to him for help with an assignment, when he had snapped at you for needing help in the first place, which led to him drinking himself to sleep in his office that night. The next morning he may have finished your work for you, leaving it on your desk once the hangover subsided, but he never acknowledged it.

Only now is he realizing how badly he fucked up.

While Nathan’s revelation hits him like a ton of bricks, causing him to feel another uncommon emotion for him- remorse. Guilt. 

“I-” he hesitates, as if mentally psyching himself up for the next words to fall from his lips, “I’m sorry, kid,” he mutters. “I’m sorry I was so hard on you, I know I fucked up,” he bluntly admits. 

At his blunt yet sincere tone, you pause in his arms, tilting your head to look up to the thickly bearded man. 

“You’re really not mad at me?” you ask hesitantly, unsure of his response. 

“No, kiddo. It was just a cup, and you could never make me genuinely mad,” he reassures with a soft shake of his head as he continues to hold you close, slowly swaying both of you in a comforting manner. 

With a gentle nod of acceptance on your behalf, a comfortable silence fills the air surrounding the kitchen of the facility. 

“Y’know,” the man speaks up in a slightly more gentle tone than he usually takes with you, “I think you’re doing a good job. You put up with me and my bullshit, you’re a smart cookie, and you even like Star Trek,” he lists with a small yet fond smile. 

“You couldn’t get better in my eyes if you tried, kid. I’m not gonna hurt you, and I will do everything I can to make sure nothing else will for that matter. I was more worried about you being hurt than the stupid cup of coffee, goofball,” he grins in a fatherly tone. 

In return, an involuntary smile breaks across your face as you both continue to sit on the kitchen floor. The worries surrounding the man you feel so attached to seem to fall away slowly at his reassurance and warm embrace. Sure, it may take some time to get used to Nathan’s new and more caring nature, but it’s a good change- a great one. 

Another comfortable silence fills the air around the both of you as you wordlessly express your affections with a tighter hug. 

With a clink of ceramic, you both look up from your embrace to see Kyoko gathering the shards of the mug with a dustpan and a cloth- always a dutiful machine. The man beside you scoffs softly in amusement before looking back to you. “Well, I’d say that’s enough barista duty for you. Kyoko seems capable. Besides, I want you to come take a look at some code with me downstairs,” he shrugs softly. “If you feel up for it, of course,” he adds in a rare moment of kindness. 

You pause for a moment, playfully humming and looking up to the high ceilings of the facility before looking up to his dark brown eyes. 

“Can you teach me some stuff about coding?” you ask with a warm smile gracing your features. 

“Duh, that’s the point, dude,” Nathan chuckles fondly as he gently encourages you to stand from the floor of the kitchen with a soft sigh. He offers you a hand to keep you steady as you stand to your full height before walking over to a cupboard and filling a glass of water for you. 

“Drink this first, though,” he orders in a blunt manner, “You cried a bunch and you need to hydrate,” he explains thoughtfully. 

With a nod of acceptance, you take the glass and begin to sip on it as the man guides you past Kyoko- who has finished cleaning up the mess- towards the elevator with a gentle hand on your upper back to guide you, caringly. As you reach the elevators and make your way down to the lab, you both talk about anything and everything that comes to mind, both of you seeming to enjoy the feelings of closeness that has brought you together as a guardian figure and as someone worth looking out for. 

The rest of the day is filled with playful jokes, lighthearted banter, and smiles (even from Nathan); a beautiful change to a growing bond of care for one another. 

[mylittleredgirl]

Least favorite Star Trek character in each series?

i love all my children equally how could you do this to me!!!!

slightly more rational answer: i have been thinking about this since yesterday when i got the ask and it's like every time i think i have an answer i immediately go "oh but i love them for XYZ" and they move up in the ranks. ultimately most treks are ensemble shows and removing anybody from the ensemble makes it all fall apart!

gun to my head, though, bearing in mind that i love all of them:

tos: gun to my head it's chapel i'm afraid and i feel bad about it. she doesn't really get to grow much and the other most-static character is probably chekov and i had a massive crush on him. in 1967 when they went "you know this show should add a mop top for the teenyboppers out there" they were talking specifically about me 30 years later.

tng: i would take the bullet for real.

ds9: man i'm going through main characters and then secondary characters and then tertiary characters and how are they all so essential and good????? literally i have gone thru a list of characters and a list of episodes and am coming up blank. even the villains are fantastic. eddington is annoying but he's supposed to be and his episodes are all great. sloan himself is fun it's just what section 31 did to star trek in general that sucks. like????? there's not a single name that shows up in the credits that doesn't make me go YEAHHHHHH.

voy: if we can count recurring characters i'm saying barclay. i liked him a lot as a character in tng and but go "for fuck's sake" whenever i see "guest star dwight schultz" on the voyager credits. i dislike pretty much every earth-contact episode after "message in a bottle" so maybe i don't like voyager-barclay because he just happens to be there?? for main cast it'd be neelix shut up shut up i love him in the ensemble but sometimes when they give him his own episode it's too much.

ent: sorry malcolm lovers this was the only show that was an easy choice. like we SHOULD dig into the fact that essentially his greatest wish is to sacrifice himself and he won't be happy until he dies on the job. klingon behavior but not at all for the fun and glory of it just because he kind of just doesn't enjoy being alive???? archer is terrible in so many ways but he's also much more enjoyable to watch being terrible.

disco: this is actually a very weird show to even know who to choose from. the cast changes every year! we barely even know the bridge crew! who is interesting enough to count as a main character?? of the main title cast i'm kind of hot and cold with adira. i like them but the sheer amount of anxiety radiating off them at all times makes me tense up whenever they come on screen. (i just realized it's kind of ironic to say adira because they're basically a mix of wesley and ezri, who would probably make this list for most other trekkies but are two of my absolute faves.) (i will think long and hard about this)

snw: i don't know that i have enough of a read on any of them? i still haven't finished it. chapel (again?? oh no) is the one i had the hardest time warming up to early on because she seemed the most wink-y and out of place in a franchise that usually takes silly things very seriously, but i did warm up to her!

lower decks: if we can go with guest characters i hate badgey (only one on here that gathers the "hate" rating!!). i don't find him (it??) funny and i know i SHOULD find it funny which means whenever it shows up i am both not having a good time and feel bad about not having a good time. the main characters are all brilliant. gun to my head it's boims but it's a close one i love them all.

i don't even know what other shows we have i've run out of steam???

oh right picard. captain shaw??? why is such a large subset of fandom so horny for him??? and shipping him with seven of nine of all things???? is it just White Guy With Trauma because there are like. a lot of other white guys with trauma in this franchise to choose from.

[onthewaytosomewhere]

20 questions for fic writers

alright i've been tagged on this a few times so guess it's time to do it....i mean i do luv tag games :)

thanks for the tags @taste-thewaste @agostobuwan @tailsbeth-writes

How many works do you have on ao3?

13- one of which is 25 fics i posted as chapters for a holiday/seasonal themed december thing - most my early work is elsewhere and i didn't do any writing for a good chunk of years lolz

What's your total ao3 word count?

76,771 (most of this was written since nov '23)

What fandoms do you write for?

RWRB currently may dip my toes into 911 at some point (my only non-rwrb fic on ao3 is marvel lol)

Top five fics by kudos:

Ring on His Finger, Putty in HIs Hands (firstprince)

Third Times a Charm? (Darcy Lewis/Clint Barton)

i've got you acting like you want more (firstprince)

- like the way you work it - (firstprince)

gotta sign 'em all (firstprince)

Do you respond to comments?

yes

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

the only thing i can think of that would be angsty towards the end would be Santa Tell Me from my Holiday Bits and Bobs - it was pretty much 1800 words of angst

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

probably the second hand unwinds - it was one of my hey sweetheart fics and is pretty much just shy of 3700 words of alex being a sap (and the boys being cute girl!dads)

Do you get hate on fics?

um not hate - but recently a weird 'that couldn't have happened cuz of yada yada' kind of comment

Do you write smut?

LOLZ - that's like most of what i write *gigglesnorts*

Craziest crossover:

don't have any of these

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don't think so

Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

not yet! but i'm super excited to work on the one with @agostobuwan💚

All time favorite ship?

omg - i don't know that's too hard - i can tell you current fave is firstprince but my all time fave might actually be HP/CharlieW - maybe? or if we're going off amount i've read for it hp/dm or kirk/mccoy oh or bagginshield

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i had always planned go back and do more for my darcy/clint fic and make it into a series, but those ideas that got written down lamented away in a doc and are gone now lol

What are your writing strengths?

um....i don't know do i have these - i can write smut fairly well

What are your writing weaknesses?

i usually hafta go back and make sure i didn't just get uber prose-y and included enough dialogue - unless i'm doing it on purpose

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

cool if it works for the character - i really like when there's a translation somewhere - unless it's obvious what it means

First fandom you wrote in?

wrote in and posted somewhere - HP - followed closely by Idol RPF - i dabbled in other things that never got posted tho b4 that (the usuals for any 'lil geeky girl - star wars, star trek, angel, buffy

Favorite fic you've written?

idk - maybe something in your mouth cuz it just came togther so quickly and was fun to write (even if i intially thought it was gonna be smuttier lolz) or maybe my silly lil fairytale baby just say yes that topped out over 20k it's my first RWRB actual AU posted that wasn't just a small ficlet

alright so few quick tags to: @typicalopposite @adreamareads @inexplicablymine @stellarm

@sophie1973 @suseagull04 @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @itsmaybitheway

[tunemyart]

I was tagged by @wistfulwatcher in 20 Questions for Fic Writers - thank you!! <33

How many works do you have on AO3?

47

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

408,521

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Actively, right now? It's Cabenson all the time. I have a crossover with Elementary in the works, if it counts? Historically: Xena: Warrior Princess, Olivia (1951), Star Trek(s touching on Voyager, Picard, and Discovery), Wicked, Once Upon a Time, Rizzoli & Isles. Waaaaay back in the day historically: A TON of Wicked, smattering of The X-Files, Battlestar: Galactica, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Stargates SG-1 and Atlantis, Doctor Who, Bones.

Oh. Also Star Wars EU as a wee child.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Presque Vu (R&I)

all the sacred boundaries we've overgrown (OUAT)

The Nature of Work Wives (R&I)

the undoing and the reweaving (XWP)

The Thing Called Future (OUAT)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yeah!! Posting fic is all about the positive human interaction for me! Obviously comments are life, we all know this; but also I have irl friendships that started in the comments of my fic because I responded. You never know who you're going to meet or in what capacity.

tl;dr if someone feels compelled enough by something that came directly out of my brain and my soul to engage tangibly with it - you bet I'm going to respond, barring irl complications.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmmm so I have been accused of being something of an angst queen, but I also like a happy ending after the angst. I think the angstiest contenders are more ambiguous, and are probably:

no one else can break my heart like you (Wicked) - because we all know what's coming in Act II

Chrysopylae (Voyager/Picard) - because I really don't think many things about Seven and Janeway's relationship can ever truly be resolved

do borg dream of individuality? (Voyager) - see above, where Janeway is starting to intuit this

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think The Thing Called Future (OUAT) is a pretty classic happy ending! So is all the sacred boundaries we've overgrown (OUAT). Both are in the right fandom for it!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've been very fortunate to get very nice, genuine folks and exactly one person I'm choosing to believe was having a bad day and taking it out on me.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Y-yes? I guess it depends on your definition of smut. There's sex for sure, but the focus is more on the emotions while it's happening than on graphic descriptions of what's happening or how it feels. Most of the time it's baked into the narrative and telling the story. I think I've really only written one or two PWP, and they're in XWP fandom.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not really! As mentioned I've got the SVU/Elementary crossover in the works, but for the reason that time and location align so incredibly perfectly. I also had a XWP/Wonder Woman crossover I wrote on a prompt (an amazon matter) and that was a lot of fun, but probably also not crazy.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not word for word or reposted.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but it would be cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but @90stvqueen and I have talked about cowriting prompts before!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Oof. I feel like I should say Xena/Gabrielle here, but Gelphie is my OG (shoutout gateway lesbians!)

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

hahahahaha pass

16. What are your writing strengths?

This is a very reflective question! I guess I'd say emotional reflection + revision/distillation. Give me an inch I'll write you a mile, and then realize I need to revise it to something closer the inch you'll actually read or the conversation the characters would actually have.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action, movement, and description of setting. Wait, no, are they sitting/standing in some nebulous, blurry-edged space having a conversation again???? nooooooooooooooooooooo

I'm working on it, and I'm proud of what my efforts are yielding, but also: ughh

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's a nice idea, but imo it distracts so hard from the flow of reading. One or two words where the reader can figure it out in context, or where the reader probably knows what it means, is great! Adds color and flavor! Entire lines that require footnotes… personally, I'm never going to look those up.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star Wars EU! Luke Skywalker/Mara Jade OTP!

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I don't know if/when my answer is going to change from The Wide Orbit (SVU) - genuinely I think it's the best thing I've ever written. A lot of work and revision went into it and I think the final product shows it. It is precisely the story I wanted to tell in precisely the way I wanted to tell it. I just reread it and am still so delighted with it.

tagging in a no-pressure way: @chthonic-cassandra @chainofclovers @90stvqueen @cargopantsprentiss @butchcraftmacncheese @neornithes @dadrielle

[thebreakfastgenie]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

Tagged by @quordleona03! I think everyone I would tag has been tagged so if you want to do it consider yourself tagged and tag me so I can see it!

How many works do you have on Ao3?

29

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

89,648

3. What fandoms do you write for?

MASH, The West Wing, Star Trek TOS

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

'Til Death (Un)does Us Part The Wideness of the World Expenses hills like white elephants Fortune Cookie Wisdom

5. Do you respond to comments?

I like to and I try to but I get overwhelmed so sometimes I don't manage to do it. Positive feedback makes me extremely anxious so it's hard sometimes (I love it, don't get me wrong, but I get itchy).

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Downpour

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably reconciliation

8. Do you get hate on fics? I never have! I never even get negative comments, although I totally welcome critical comments. I never got hate in the fanfiction.net era, either. I've been fortunate.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't, but I would like to start! I think I want to start with m/f, even though the experience I have to draw on is f/f, but ultimately I want to do it all. I'm starting with more vanilla stuff, because I'm not so much interested in writing erotica as I am in being able to depict sex in prose. I'm open to writing kinkier stuff eventually but for now I'm just trying to add a tool (hehe) to my writer's toolbox.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I wrote one once; it was actually the first fic I posted, and it was an Ace Attorney/NCIS crossover. I was in middle school. It's still out there but I will not be linking it. I like crossovers but it's very hard to make them work, so I mostly play around with them in silly posts and bullet points, not full fics.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I would be honored if someone did translate one.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I don't think so! I've co-developed ideas with friends but it's always one of us ultimately writing it. I don't know how good at co-writing I would be because I'm a perfectionist control freak and also very slow.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Fic wise, probably Kirk/Spock. There are other ships I love a lot and outside a fic context I'm not sure I could ever pick, but I actually write very few ships and I think Kirk/Spock is the One. Runner up would be the Doctor/Rose Tyler, I wrote them once and I have fic-y feelings about them. I've never read or written them because I don't do fandom for this series but Indiana Jones/Marion Ravenwood have had my heart since I was twelve and I'd sell most of my ships for them. Also House/Cuddy is a ship of all time but I don't really like any House fic. I love CJ/Danny and Josh/Donna as well as some other West Wing ships but they're not the main attraction to me and most of the fic I write does not focus on them.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I was planning to write more of The Wideness of the World and at this point I doubt I'll write Hamilton fic again but I had some really good ideas and I like that fic enough that it bugs me. Still, it stands fine as it is.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, characterization, restraint, attention to detail. Hopefully pacing, I'm very aware of it but I don't know if I'm successful enough for it to be a strength. I'm playing a lot with structure and literary devices right now but I'm not sure they count as a strength yet. I guess willingness to experiment is the strength.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action, description, sex. Sex is the worst because it's action involving body parts we have stupid words for. Being slow, horrible writer's block because I'm too much of a perfectionist to write a rough draft.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It's very, very hard to do well. I think in most fic cases, either the POV character knows what's being said and you can just write it in English (or whatever language the rest is in) or the POV character can't understand it and you can just say "they were speaking x language and they didn't understand." If I felt I really needed to include dialogue in another language I'd find someone who could help me translate and credit them.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

NCIS

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

The Emergency Room but if I actually manage to finish my time loop WIP....

[staringdownabarrel]

Among the Lotus Eaters was a bit of a disappointing episode. I don't mean disappointing as in it's bad--I think it's a fairly middle-of-the-road Star Trek episode, and I probably will see it again at some point. I mean it's disappointing in the sense that it could have gone a lot harder.

The first season of Strange New Worlds had episodes like Strange New Worlds and Lift Us Where Suffering Cannot Reach, which were cool examinations of some of the edge cases of the Prime Directive. You know, the murky areas where maybe someone would want to get involved, but what actually counts as a natural development for a society either becomes extremely subjective or it's broad enough to also include choices you specifically don't agree with.

So to go from stuff like that to an episode like this, where the answer to the question is ultimately "we did the contaminating so we can do the decontaminating as well" is a step down. It's the kind of episode which, ironically, probably would have been considered a pretty run-of-the-mill episode for the original series.

I feel like a more interesting direction they could have gone with this episode is if maybe instead of this planet having been contaminated due to a previous away mission, a ship had have been destroyed in orbit and someone on the surface had been able to recover the medical supplies and had worked out how to use them on a very basic level.

This kind of route would have tied in a lot better to the radiation sickness element of this episode. It's already been well established that Starfleet will hand out medical supplies to anyone who asks for them, so this would have been an interesting case of "ignore principle x to fulfill principle y or vice versa" kind of story. The Prime Directive probably would have still won out, but this still would have been a more interesting edge case episode.

But yeah, not exactly a bad episode; just one that I think could have been done differently.

[starsmuserainbow]

Tag People You’d like to get to know better!

Tagged by @xanican-exile - thank you!

favorite color(s): Probably pink/purple ish, but honestly, I prefer a mix of all the colors when possible

favorite flavor(s): I... have no idea.

favorite genre(s): I'd say superhero, sci-fi, and fantasy? Something like that probably. Honestly, I don't know if I really have a genre, it's just that these are the obvious things I can name bc of the things I like.

favorite music: I have no idea. I have various songs I like, usually nothing too shout-y but outside of that,

favorite series: Teen Titans (duh), and RWBY too although I still miss my favourite character being in there. I do like Star Trek too, still watching my way through all the "older" shows. Oh, and Miraculous too

last series: Watching the new RWBY-season as it comes out, and just yesterday watched another two episodes or so of Star Trek Voyager.

last movie: Mario! Lovely looks, would've preferred the whole thing to not have the 'travel to another universe' thing and it all to just take place completely in the world of the Mushroom Kingdom, but oh well. It was still a nice watch.

currently reading: I haven't read any books in way too long. Unless you count comics here and there.

currently watching: Uh, see 'last series' I guess?

currently working on: Right now? Trying to write some replies. Longer scale? Too many iconing projects, getting to know the char studio of that game that I created my muses in, finally getting gaming again bc I really wanna get through all these amazing games waiting for me, actually working on making verses for the muses on my Multi. Probably more, but this is enough to name.

[per-ineptia-ad-astra]

This isn’t the kind of thing I normally do around here, but it seemed like it might be a bit of fun. I’ve absolutely no idea if it’s something you all would be interested in, though, so let me know if you like it or not—if not, I’ll just leave it as a one-off and go back to the regular memes to fill the time while I’m working on Space Seed.

Recently I’ve been playing resource management/base building type games a lot, which I suspect stems from the fact that managing resources in my real life is going rather less well, the latest of these being Stonehearth, a cute voxel game where you guide a group of beady-eyed little people into building a village for them to live in. I’d played a fair bit of it over the past winter but hadn’t touched it in several months, enough time for there to be a couple of updates to the content*, so I decided to see what had been added in the interim.

*Technically the officially-approved-but-player-created-mod-expansion.

But once I got around to selecting my starting villagers, I ran into the same problem I always have at these moments in games—what to name everybody? I’m a massive overthinker about this sort of thing, you see, the sort who will spend ages scouring Wikipedia to find the most thematically appropriate set of things to name all the characters after. On this occasion, though, as I stared aimlessly around my desk trying to come up with something, inspiration struck in the shape of the copy of Star Trek: The Classic Episodes that I still hadn’t put away. Or possibly it was the Data Funko Pop. Either way, I thought, well, why not…?

[ID: A screenshot of the ‘Customize your party’ screen in the video game Stonehearth. On the left are five miniature profiles for cartoonish voxel versions of Kirk, Sulu, McCoy, Scotty and Uhura. Their Mind, Body and Spirit stats are, respectively,  4/5/4,  3/2/6, 4/3/4,  6/2/5, and 3/4/6. On the right is an appearance customization screen with Uhura selected.]

And thus was born a quest to see the crew of the Enterprise through their colonization of wherever the hell it is they’ve ended up this time. Or at least, some of the crew of the Enterprise. I don’t think my computer could handle simulating the full four hundred and thirty of them.

Stonehearth villagers (or ‘hearthlings) have three stats—Mind, Body and Spirit-- as well as up to two traits that influence their behavior. In the starting roster, you can’t directly alter their stats or traits, but you can randomly generate villagers individually or as a group for as long as you want until you get something you like, and can change their names and appearances freely. By default, all the villagers are workers, but with the right items they can be promoted into special classes, such as warriors who defend the village, crafters who make necessary items, or resource-suppliers like farmers and trappers. My starting selection of characters was based on the roles that I judged most important to the getting this colony off the ground. (It may be helpful to keep in mind throughout this, though, that I am not very good at Stonehearth.) The traits I just kind of took where I could get them, since it would have taken an enormously long time to roll for the absolute most character-appropriate ones.

Kirk has the traits ‘Night Owl’ (he’ll stay up later at night and sleep more in the day) and ‘Jokester’ (he likes to tell jokes to the others, which has a chance to increase their moods). I was unsure what to do with him at first, since there’s not really any kind of leadership position for hearthlings. In the end I decided he would make a good Knight, a heavy armor combat class. After all, protecting everyone else in the group at the risk of his own life is a pretty Kirk-ish thing to do. He’ll have to spend some time as a Footman, the basic combat class, before he can promote to Knight, though.

Sulu has the traits ‘Green Thumb’ (he gets a happiness boost from being around plants) and ‘Pack Mule’ which means he can carry more than usual. This is a good combo of traits for a farmer, and since Sulu likes plants he seemed like the most natural choice for that role.

McCoy has the trait ‘Pessimistic’ which makes him more affected by things that cause negative mood modifiers, because of course he does. His class was far and way the easiest to pick: he’ll spend some time as a Herbalist, a crafting class that can make bandages and medicines, until he can promote to Cleric, a combat class that can heal.

Scotty has the traits ‘Gregarious’ (he enjoys talking to other villagers more) and ‘Animal Companion’ (he spawns with a pet, in this case a raccoon named Cactus). Alright, perhaps not the most Scotty-ish of traits, but hey, he had good stats. Scotty’s going to be a Carpenter, the staple crafting class for the Ascendency faction, who use wood as their primary resource. (There actually is an Engineer class, but it doesn’t come into play until much later and the Carpenter is considerably more important for the early game.)

Finally, Uhura has the ‘Empathetic’ trait (she gets a negative mood modifier from being around other villagers who have negative mood modifiers) and is going to be a Trapper, a class that traps animals for meat and fur and can promote to the Shepherd, who raises livestock animals. A bit of a stretch, I know, but hey, there’s no communications-based class, and someone had to be a Trapper. Plus, Trappers have a chance of bringing animals home as pets, which is what started The Trouble With Tribbles, so, hey.

With the starting roster confirmed, all that remains is to first pick a starting resource package—I’ve gone with the Merchant Caravan, which will give us some starting food and gold as well as the promotion items for a Trapper, Footman and Herbalist—and then roll a map. Eventually—after spending far too long generating and re-generating maps—I’ve settled on a nice location by a lake, with plenty of trees, and mountains nearby to dig for ore and stone in. The only downside is it’s a bit exposed, so hopefully nothing too big attacks before we’re able to build some walls.

[ID: A screenshot showing a zoomed-out grassy landscape near a lake, with a message box reading “Click the banner to choose your settlement’s location.” At the bottom of the screen is a blue banner that reads “Click me to place your town banner.”]

Soon after selecting our starting location, a messenger bird arrives with a letter.

[ID: A screenshot showing a message box with a voxel bird displayed above it, titled ‘A Bird...Messenger?’ The box reads “An odd bird arrives with a letter in its beak, stamped with the official seal of the Ascendency.” In smaller text: “The bird also carries a nametag, which reads ‘Harold’. Below the box are two options: ‘Open the letter’ and ‘[skip] We know what banner we want.’]

The letter reads:

Dear Expedition 142,

I hope this letter finds you well. By my guess, you’ve likely set up camp by now.

As your Capital Liaison, it is my honor to preside, remotely, over the official Founding of your Outpost! I trust that you had ample time to choose a name on your journey.

As you know, every new settlement must choose a Banner.

This Banner reflects your spirit and vision, the uniting factor which brought the Expedition together!

What future did you foresee when you embarked on your quest for Township?

Hold in your mind a vision of what your Town will one day be. Your Banner will set that course, but it is up to you to finish it.

Choose well, my friends. I eagerly await your reply.

Yours,

Mer Burlyhands

We could choose a banner of Vitality, which plants to grow faster and trees to drop more wood; Strength, which increases the amount of ore you get from mining and makes hearthlings not mind living in cramped spaces; or Cunning, which makes traders visit more frequently and traded items sell for more.

I choose the Banner of Vitality. The name of the town, of course, is Enterprise.

[ID: A message box titled ‘Outpost Established!’ which reads: “Proclamation of Outpost: By Unanimous agreement of the citizens, we declare Enterprise to be an outpost striving to be at one with the environment. Trees produce 25% more wood. Plants and crops both grow 25% faster. Plants have 2x their normal Appeal.”]

The messenger bird drops off some extra starting food supplies before leaving. Now it’s time to get to the business of actually building this town. Colony. Whatever.

First off, promotions for everyone! Except Sulu. It’ll be a bit before we can promote Sulu. Sorry, Sulu.

[ID: Four cropped shots of message boxes which read “Promote to [Carpenter/Herbalist/Trapper/Footman]. In honor of steadfast efforts and resilience, we hereby advance [Montgomery Scott/Leonard McCoy/Nyota Uhura/James Kirk]. 4th Day of Bittermun 1000.” Below the text is a stamp icon which reads ‘click to approve.’]

Then we establish a stockpile—a designated location for items to go—and cut down some trees. We’re going to need wood to make buildings and furniture, as well as for fuel.

After a bit of consideration, I decide to move the hearth closer to the lake, near to where our first building is going to go up. For the moment, however, night is falling, and everyone gathers to rest around the fire.

[ID: A screenshot showing voxel-McCoy, Uhura, Sulu and Scotty sitting around a campfire on the shores on a lake.]

...everyone except Kirk, who, for reasons best known only to himself, has fallen asleep in the stockpile.

[ID: 1. A screenshot showing voxel-Kirk laying asleep on the ground in a stockpile full of logs and food supplies. 2. A zoomed-out screenshot showing how far away Kirk is from everyone else around the campfire.]

Thus was founded the town/settlement/colony/localized disaster area known as Enterprise. What could possibly go wrong?

[classickook]

see through | rafe cameron

pairing: rafe cameron x fem!reader

summary: rafe is drawn to you and has been trying to get your attention for years, but you don't give him the time of day, always brushing him off and exuding a cold exterior, until the day he finally gets you to warm up to him and admit how you truly feel.

warnings: none (i think?)

word count: 2.3k

a/n: so this ended up going somewhere i wasn't originally planning and i lowkey hate it but whatever, i hope you still like it <3

Y/N felt a presence next to her, the scent of a familiar cologne encroaching on her personal space. Someone was propped up against the edge of her locker, hands in pockets and a charming grin gracing his lips. “Y/N, hey.”

She spared him a quick glance before turning back to her books. “And you are?” She didn’t need to ask that question, she already knew. Rafe Cameron: star quarterback, class president, and a giant pain in her ass. Everyone on campus knew who he was, and if they didn’t, well, someone from his posse would certainly fill them in.

He chuckled, broad shoulders rising with the movement. “Really? Rafe Cameron?” he asked, pointing a finger to his chest. “We’ve only been classmates for three years.”

“Hmm, doesn’t seem to ring any bells,” she said, closing her locker door a smidge too forcefully, and beginning the trek to her next class.

He quickly fell into step next to her. “Hey, did I do something?”

“Nope.”

“Are you sure? Because it seems like you dislike me an awful lot and I’m trying to figure out why.”

She came to a stop and faced him. “Wow, am I that transparent?”

“What?”

“Look, Cameron—”

“Rafe.”

“Right,” she said, dismissively, knowing full well what his name was. “Listen, I’m kind of in a hurry right now, so could we continue this conversation later?” Or never, she thought.

He scratched behind his ear, ruffling his hair a bit in the process. “Uh… y-yeah, I guess that’s fine. But I—”

“Great!” And with that, she turned around and continued walking to class, leaving the frustratingly charming boy behind her and feeling her resolve slowly begin to crumble.

“Y/N!”

She groaned internally at the voice calling out to her—his voice. She had been trying to avoid him all day, but he somehow always managed to find her and burrow his way under her skin.

“Hey, Y/N,” Rafe said, slightly out of breath from his jog over to her. “I’ve been calling your name. Did you not hear me?”

She forced a smile. “Guess not.”

“Oh. Um, do you think we could maybe talk now? If you have time?”

She sighed. “Sure, why not.”

He coughed nervously. “Great. Um, listen. I really don’t know what I did or if we got off on the wrong foot or something, but could we start over? Maybe be friends? Or something close to friends?”

“Why?”

“I just—I think you’re really great and your input in class is incredible—”

“Class? What class?”

He raised an eyebrow. “French literature? We’ve been in the same class all semester? I literally sit right behind you.”

“Oh. Must not have noticed.” That was a lie. Of course she had noticed.

Rafe felt his cheeks heat but continued his speech like he had practiced. “Anyway, I think you’re smart and talented and I’d really like to get to know you better if you’d let me.”

She thought about it for a moment, or, at least pretended to. Did she want to be his friend? Yes. But did she want to be so obvious about it? After all these years watching him from afar—living his perfect life, top of his class, star athlete, surrounded by slews of other classmates vying for his attention—hell no. She didn’t want to be that girl, and she had spent all this time making sure of it. She would not fall victim to Rafe Cameron’s charms and become just like the rest of his posse. Or, if she was being honest with herself, she just simply didn't think she was good enough for him.

She met his gaze. “I suppose. I mean, we’re in the same literature class anyway. Wouldn’t hurt to have another study partner, so might as well.”

“Statistics and business managment, too.”

“What?”

“We have three classes together.”

“Oh.” She must’ve played her role a little too well, to the point where she truly didn’t notice him at times. The realization stung a little.

“So? Would you maybe want to go grab a coffee sometime? My treat,” he said with an easy smile.

“I don’t drink coffee.” Another lie. She loved coffee.

“Oh, um. Tea, then? Or we could go somewhere else. Whatever you want—”

“I’m just messing with you, Cameron. Coffee would be great.”

His expression relaxed. “Okay. How about tomorrow after class? We could walk together?”

“Sure.” And this time, she allowed something that felt like a genuine smile to the boy.

True to his word, Rafe was waiting for Y/N just outside the door of her last class sporting a sweet yet shy smile. “Hi, Y/N.”

“Greetings, Cameron.”

He didn’t bother correcting her, actually becoming comfortable with the use of his surname from her. “Ready to go?” he asked.

She waved her hand in front of them. “Lead the way.”

They made the trek to the nearest coffee shop on campus in comfortable silence, crunching through fallen leaves and enjoying the crisp autumn air, their breaths escaping them in visible puffs.

Holding the door open for her in a gentlemanly fashion she wasn’t expecting, Rafe led Y/N up to the counter to order; a honey oatmilk latte for her, a plain black coffee for him, and two different pastries for them to share per his insistence. Apparently, the boy had a sweet tooth, something she found incredibly endearing.

While she initially thought the outing would be filled with awkward silences and forced smiles, Y/N actually found it relatively easy to fall into conversation with him. He was kind and charming and held her gaze while she answered each of his questions, giving her his full undivided attention, even going so far as to tilt his body in her direction, just enough to be noticeable. In short, she felt comfortable with him, something she truly didn’t believe would happen considering her conflicted feelings toward the boy. Rafe was perfect and completely out of her league, but she fell for him anyway. All these years she had tried her hardest to stay out of his way, hoping she could make it to graduation without ever confessing how she felt.

The pair spent several hours studying for their three shared classes to which the topic of conversation moved to talking about their families, plans after college, favorite books and taste in music, and they quickly lost track of time.

As they were packing up their belongings, Rafe surprised her with a final parting question. “Do you think we could do this again sometime?"

Y/N pretended to think about it, even going so far as to tap her chin in thought. “Hmm,” she said, watching the boy squirm at her hesitance. “Sure, Cameron.” She could’ve sworn she heard the slightest breath of relief escape him and grinned internally.

He surprised her again when he asked to exchange phone numbers. “Oh, right. That would help with the whole studying bit,” she said, handing him her phone.

Rafe chuckled. “You can text me whenever, not just for studying.” He typed his number into her phone and handed it back to her, fingers brushing hers in the process. She blushed and hoped he couldn’t see.

Now fully satisfied with each other's numbers, the pair exited the coffee shop, said their goodbyes, and went their separate ways.

Rafe was waiting for Y/N outside her class, just like he did every other time before, their coffee “dates” becoming a weekly outing for the two. Y/N wasn’t quite sure she wanted to refer to these... events… as dates, the term seeming too comfortable, too rushed. But, God, did she want them to be dates. She could feel herself slipping each time she came in contact with the boy, talking to him, really getting to know him and falling for him even more.

And, again, just like all the other times, Rafe insisted on paying for her drink. She adamantly refused, feeling a bit guilty, but he always insisted that it was nothing, that he was happy to pay for her.

Rafe rolled his eyes at her now, but there was an affectionate grin pulling at his lips. “Seriously, Y/N. It’s really not a big deal. Let me do this for you.”

“Okay,” she said quietly.

Sitting at their usual table, they began their weekly study session, quizzing each other and sharing notes, until, once again, their conversation bled into different territory.

Rafe cleared his throat. “I have something for you,” he said before leaning over to retrieve something from his backpack, pulling out a carefully wrapped box and sliding it across the table to her. “A little birdie told me that it was your birthday.”

The girl raised her brows, eyeing the gift. “How did you know?”

“Your roommate,” he said sheepishly. “We share a class and she happened to mention it in passing, so I thought I would get you something.” He scratched his jaw. “I hope you don’t mind.”

Y/N felt her cheeks heat and had to stop herself from crying at the sweet gesture. She had no idea that the boy had paid such close attention to her. Truly, she didn’t know that he had noticed her at all over the past few years, but now…

She pulled the gift toward her, taking extra care to remove the ribbon and unwrap the decorative paper. It was a book.

“It’s nothing special, but it’s one of my favorites and I thought you might like to give it a read and we could discuss it together? I marked some of my favorite passages, but maybe you could do so as well? I’d really like to know what you think,” Rafe rambled, his words melding together.

She flipped through the pages and saw that there were, in fact, marked passages, underlinings, and annotations in the margins. Y/N felt a fluttering in her chest at the sight. It was so sweet and genuine and specially made just for her, a gift infinitely better than any typical store-bought gift she had received in the past.

Rafe Cameron, as it turned out, was so much more than she had originally thought him to be. He was thoughtful, smart, honest, and at this moment, completely vulnerable with her. And for that, she fell for him even further, like dandelion fluff drifting away from its center, letting go and setting itself free.

Y/N lifted her eyes from the book to meet his gaze, and she smiled at the way he was hunched over slightly, fingers drumming nervously on the wooden table. “Thank you so much, Rafe,” she said, and she hoped he could feel how much she meant it.

The use of his first name didn’t go unnoticed by the boy and he returned her smile in full, mouth pulling at the corners in a set of parentheses that peeked out at her, enclosing that smile like another gift and saving it just for her. “You’re welcome.”

She eyed the book again, already looking forward to returning to her dorm so she could crack open the spine and fall into the carefully marked pages.

“How about another pastry for the birthday girl?” he asked kindly, already rising from his chair. “What would you like?”

“Surprise me,” she said.

He winked at her. “You got it.”

“I’m about to say something and I hope you can be honest with me,” Rafe started when they were comfortably seated at their usual table, coffee cups already placed between them and warming their hands.

“I’ve been enjoying myself these past several weeks and I really like you, which I think you might have been able to tell by now?” The last sentence came out as more of a question than a statement. Y/N swallowed audibly and tried to hide the shaking in her hands as Rafe continued, “I don’t mean to assume anything, but I think you might possibly feel the same way about me? At least, I hope you do. I can’t really be sure. You’re kind of hard to read,” he said, bringing his cup to his lips and taking a small sip to prevent himself from confessing even further and end up embarrassing himself. Her eyes followed the movement.

Y/N figured it was probably time to tell the boy how she felt, how she had been feeling over the past few years. Screw her original plan. It had been foolish of her to think she could hide this secret from him, so she told him everything, watching as his eyes lit up at each new revelation. But guilt gripped him when she confessed that she had always thought him to be too good for her. God, that tore him apart, hating how she had avoided him all this time, not even giving him the time of day, just because she assumed he wouldn’t care.

“That is the furthest thing from the truth,” he told her firmly. He tilted his chin down in an attempt to meet her gaze, which had fallen to her hands resting in her lap. When that didn’t seem to work, he reached around the table until his fingers wrapped around the edge of her chair and dragged her over to his side. She gasped and finally looked at him, and he was suddenly close, oh so close, she could see a dusting of freckles across the tops of his cheeks that she hadn’t noticed before.

He crooked his index finger under her chin and she could feel the cool metal of his ring pressing into her skin. “Don’t assume something like that, okay? You have no idea how perfect you are.”

She let out a humorless laugh. “I am far from perfect.”

“You’re perfect for me,” he said, and the way he said it left no room for argument.

Yes, Y/N might have fallen first, but Rafe fell harder.

He reached for her hand, his thumb sliding across her skin in soft, soothing motions. “Go on a date with me,” he said. “A real one this time, not just coffee.”

She felt giddy and light and happier than ever. “I’d love that,” she said.

Rafe leaned closer and pressed a kiss to her forehead before pulling back and giving her a dopey smile. “Perfect.”

taglist: @pogueslandia

[hogwartsmarvelmommy]

Second chances and unspoken promises (TH) 🔥

Word count: 7.2k

Masterlist

Join my taglist

Summary: three years since the fall of your secret relationship, and a journey back to the place it all started. You could be leaving even more heartbroken, or maybe the stars will align and it'll be your time.

Warnings: some angst, fluff, smut. Secret relationship. Talk of a long secret relationship during early years. Break up, slight insecurities, overall I think that's it (let me know if you see anything I didn't mention)

Additional warnings: oral (f receiving) fingering, showering together, unprotected sex (don't be silly)

A/n this took me so long to finish 🙄 but here it finally is 😁

~~~

Your tires skidded to a stop on the blanket of white snow that led up the driveway of the large secluded cabin. The weather had progressively gotten worse from when you had first begun your drive until now, visibility dwindling quickly due to the large snowflakes fluttering down. You were sure with how heavily the snow was falling, by morning all the cars that lined the large drive would be covered. 

It had been a few years since all of you had made the journey up, everyone's life becoming jam packed, and busy. This trip itself was a last minute plan. Sam had called just a few days prior, insisting you join. Something about a dire need for nostalgia or something to the effect. 

The December's up here we're rough. Quite often having blizzards that would bury the cabin owners in for days, but even that didn't stop the Hollands. This year only the three eldest boys, and close friends Harrison Osterfeild and Tuwaine Barrett, had made the trek up, knowing the weather forecast was warning of a hefty snow storm. 

You had been coming up to the Hollands family cabin since you were a tot, when your parents would accompany you, you were on every trip, so much so you had your own room, separated from the boys as you were always the only girl. This cabin was the place you had your first kiss, the place you lost your virginity, and it was also the place your heart had been broken into a million pieces. 

You weren't sure exactly what had made you say yes, knowing the last time you stood inside the four walls, your world had crumbled down around you. Maybe it was curiosity, maybe it was just because you were reluctant to believe that that had really been the end.. three long years, and you were still just as in love with him as you were the first time you kissed him at only eleven, under the stairs in the potter closet. 

You took a deep breath before shutting off your engine, not actually prepared to deal with the chill that was going to take over as soon as you opened the door to walk to the boot and collect your bag. You pushed the door open, swinging your feet out to the plush snow that was still coming down, you could get your bag and run, but that ran the risk of falling on your ass and making yourself freeze, or you could just endure the two minutes max it would take you. 

You relentlessly walked to the back of the car, grabbing your heavy bag and lighter one as well before walking up the not so recently shoveled path. 

You could hear the words echoing in your head as you neared the front door. "Your not enough y/n, your not worth it," the words had shattered you, making you feel less than a dirty tissue. You stood in the door that day, as you watched the love of your life leave, destined to do spectacular things, leaving you behind and broken. The worst part? No one had ever known what had gone on between the two of you. Years, of secret meet ups, stolen kisses, and dumb excuses. 

The closest anyone had ever come to finding the truth was the winter of 2018, when Sam had seen Tom leaving your room in the middle of the night, hair a mess and sweaty as he sneaked back to his room. Somehow you had managed to convince him he had imagined the whole thing.. you still weren't sure how that had worked in your favor. 

You took the final steps to the large oak door, glancing at the slab of concrete that held each of your hand prints embedded next to your names, ordered from oldest to youngest. Toms, yours, Sam's, Harry's and then Paddy's little baby hand, him barely being a year when you had made the sweet memory.

"Alright," you whispered as you turned the handle stepping into the toasty cabin. The smell of pasta hit you instantly, something you were sure Sam was whipping up. You heard loud conversations coming from in the main family room, with light music playing in the background. You dropped your bags down next to the staircase, slipping your boots off and onto the mat, and then stripping your heavy coat off, leaving you in just leggings, a light hoodie, and your maroon beanie. Nerves picking up at this point, unaware of who was here yet, and how you would be greeted, having not seen everyone in so long. There was a pattering coming towards you as you looked over to see the grown staffy running at you. "Hi Tess," you sang as you got to her level, letting her greet you with slobbery kisses. "Missed you too darling," you told her as you scratched her head. 

"Tessa?" Tom called, rounding the corner and stopping at the sight of you with the pup, a sight he had seen before, when she was smaller, and you were his. "Hi," he whispered. 

You glanced up, smiling before getting to your feet, Tess not leaving your side. "Hi Tommy," you said, barely above a whisper. Neither of you moved, standing there just looking at each other as if you were in a standoff, waiting to see who would do or say something first. 

"Hey Tom do you- oh my god Y/n's here," Harry yelled pushing past his stunned older brother to wrap you in a long overdue hug. "Missed you kid," he told you, squeezing you too tight. 

"Harry," you giggled, swatting at his curly red hair. 

"Sorry, sorry. It's just been so long," he pointed out.

"Y/n?" Sam's voice was eager as he rounded the corner, nearly in a Sprint as he made his way to you. "God I'm so glad you came!" He screeched as he lifted you into his arms.  

"Me too," you hummed, returning the hug. 

"C'mon, let's go introduce you to everyone," Harry urged, grabbing your hand. 

"Everyone?" You asked in confusion. 

"Harrison, Tuwaine, and Sam's girlfriends," Harry told you. You nodded, not being aware there would be other girls on the trip. The news actually excited you, maybe the estrogen would calm the boys down from being so rowdy and rambunctious. 

"Grace, Molly, Clark-" Harry announced, making the three girls turn towards you. "This is Y/n y/l/n, our oldest friend,"

The three girls got up making their way to you, as the four of you exchanged pleasantries. 

"We have heard so much about you!" Gracie exclaimed. 

"I'm really glad to finally not be the only girl up here," you admitted as you were ushered over to sit with the three of them. 

Meanwhile, Tom was still standing in the front hall, not sure what to do with himself. He had thought that seeing you would be easy. You were just y/n, after all. But when his eyes met yours, the pink hue of your cheeks and nose, sent his mind rushing back to years prior, when he would pull you into the potter closet, freshly in from the snow, kissing the tip of your nose and cradling your hands as he attempted to warm you up. You would never know how much he had loved you, how much he had appreciated and cherished every stolen moment the two of you had shared together, up until the last one. The words still burned his throat, remembering the look on your face as he said them, desperate to not hurt you, but he somehow had managed to screw that up. He had just wanted to let you live your life, not following him around as his life had gotten too overwhelming, he hadn't wanted to put that stress on you, knowing you would have endured it for him, even if it killed you. 

But to see you, just a few steps from him, letting Tess slobber on you with her kisses, nose red, cheeks rosy, in your signature cold outfit, wearing his old hoodie. He wanted to take it all back, he wanted to have crossed the distance pulling you into his arms, burying his face in your neck as he whispered how badly he missed you, and then to pull away, to meet your lips with his, in a warm kiss, a kiss that would bring it all back, every broken promise, every missed opportunity, every longing feeling..

"You alright mate?" Haz asked, bringing Tom out of his head.

"M'allright," Tom lied, knowing Harrison could see right through him, he was the only one who knew, knew how desperately Tom had loved you, how crushed he had been when he called things off, how hard it had been as he walked away from who he was sure was the one. You had been his first, first kiss, first shag, first love, first heartbreak… and he desperately wanted you to be his last. Last love, last kiss, last goodnight, last person he held in his arms on his deathbed. He was sure there was no way, not with the look you had given him three years prior, tears threatening to spill over the brim of your eyes, bottom lip quivering, as you just watched him leave, watched him walk out of your life with no promise to ever return..

This was sure to be a long trip.. 

You nestled your way between Harry and Tess laying your head on Harry's shoulder with your hot chocolate in your hands listening to the conversation they were all having. The fire in the wood burning stove was blazing, radiating a heat that was warming you all to the core. Dinner had come and gone with some slight small talk, leading to everyone shifting to the family room. Sam was in the middle of telling Tuwaine something, to which you weren't paying attention when Molly asked you a question. 

"So y/n, do you have a boyfriend?" She asked, politely.  Your cheeks flushed red as you lifted your head from where it was resting on Harry's shoulder before. 

"No, no boyfriend," you told her with a chuckle.

"Really?" Grace interjected, now solely intrigued with the gossip. "How long since you had one?" She wondered. 

"Three years, actually, pretty close to the day," you took a deep breath all to aware of Tom's, eyes directly on you from across the couch. 

"Three years? Must have been some heartbreak," Clark said, a pitying look on her face. Truth be told, Tom was never your boyfriend, never having put a label on whatever it was the two of you had been doing, but she was right, it was definitely 'some heartbreak'.

"Yeah, I just wasn't enough," you said quietly, an ache in your chest knowing the man who had said those words sitting just a short distance from you. 

"No way," Clark shook her head. "He wasn't good enough for you," she shot you a sweet smile. 

"That's true," Tom muttered from where he had been sitting quietly on the couch, making all the girls turn towards him. 

"Did you know him?" Grace asked. Tom's eyes widened, realizing he had spoken too loud. 

"I- yeah," he sighed, knowing they were going to quiz him on the subject now. 

"Was he awful?" Molly wondered. 

"No, he was great," 

"He was an ass," 

You and Tom had spoken at the same time, you looked up, eyes meeting him in a lingering stare. "He was great," you repeated, not looking away from him. 

"How could you still think that after what i- he said to you?" Tom asked. With your attention fully on him, you could almost forget the others in the room with you.

"He was young, I was younger. Life caught up with us and made the fantasy we were living too real too fast, doesn't mean I have to hate him. I still love him, never stopped…" you reached next to you scratching in between Tessa's ears. "Sometimes you have to push past the hurt to try and understand other people," you whispered, not daring to look up. 

"Is he your soulmate?" Harry asked. You looked besides you, not even aware that he had tuned into the conversation. 

"I don't know," you chuckled. 

You looked across from you to see Tom's sight glued to his hands in his lap, completely unreadable.  

"Have you been with anyone since?" Grace asked, everyone turning to you. 

"Like?" 

"Sexually?"

"Oh," you felt your cheeks heat up at the question. "No actually, he's the only man I have ever been with," you admitted, making Tom's head shoot up to look at you, shock plastered on his face. 

"Three years?" Harry gasped, Dramatically sliding down as though he was wounded. "That's too damn long to not be laid," he told you. 

"I agree," Grace giggled. 

You shook your head and let out a chuckle. You had never been able to bring yourself to move on, fear that it would be betraying your heart, which clearly belonged to someone else, after so many years, it still belonged to him.. 

It was nearly two am when the welcoming conversation died down, Clark and Sam excusing themselves first, followed closely by Harry, and Then you. 

You grabbed your bags, heading up the stairs to the room that had been yours for so many years. The door creaked open, as you pushed through, dropping your bags at the end of the old bed before switching on the lamp. A picture of you and Tom neatly placed in a frame next to it. 

You could still remember the day it was taken, Niki had been following behind all of you as you hiked up the big hill to sled down. You had lost your balance, falling over and pulling Tom down with you, into a soft pile of snow. The smiles on your faces as you had been giggling were so pure, filled with love and adoration. Even Niki could see that, snapping a picture of the moment to be frozen in time forever. 

You walked over to the bed, sitting down lightly as you watched the snow fall from out the window. The view was mesmerizing. The white blanket covering the ground making it impossible for it to be dark. 

You had forgotten how at home it felt here, being where you had grown into a woman, almost every important defining moment happening within these four walls. There was a soft knock on the door. 

"Yeah?" You called out. The door creaked open, and Harrison's head peaked in. 

"Can we talk for a sec?" He asked you. 

"Sure," you nodded to him, before he finished opening the door and walking over to sit beside you.

"I know it really isn't my place to tell you this, but he loves you. He's crazy about you, and that never stopped," he looked over to gauge your reaction. 

"Haz," 

"Y/n, I know that what he did was awful, but you have to know his intentions were pure," you took a deep breath and nodded before sitting back to hear what he had to say. "You knew how busy he got during the civil war, and then with homecoming and infinity war it was even worse, he didn't want to put you through it anymore. With Endgame, and Far from home he had almost no time to do anything else. And he knew it was going to be that way, he knew he wasn't going to be able to be there for you," he explained. 

"He told me-" 

"I know. I know what he said, and I'm not saying you have to forgive him, but just know, he didn't mean it, okay?" He looked at you with his soft blue eyes, trying to fix his best friend's mess. Honestly, what Tom had done hurt you, but you knew he hadn't meant it, there was no way he had meant it. 

"Okay," you nodded. 

"Okay, got to get back to Gracie now," he told you as he jumped up and rushed out. You turned your attention back to the window, hopeful that this trip would get you answers, or at least some closure.

You opened your eyes to the splattering noise at your window. You could see the remnants of an exploded snowball splattered about. You rolled out of bed, pulling the fuzzy blanket that had been on top of you around your body as you made your way to the window. Sam was bundled up, running as Harry charged at him, a freshly made snowball in hand as Tom stood holding Tessa's leash as he watched his younger brothers goofing off. 

He glanced up to the window seeing you looking down at him and lifted his hand in an awkward wave. You giggled and waved back, walking away from the window, and making your way downstairs. The quietness of the house led you to believe everyone else was still asleep. You walked over to the still lit wood stove and tossed in a few more logs to ensure the heat would continue. 

You had never been a great cook, you were actually certifiably bad, but you still decided to go to the kitchen and begin to pull out the ingredients for breakfast. 

You were on your tiptoes about to reach the flour when you heard the front door open and felt the gust of wind. 

"What are you doing?" Sam asked casually as he walked up to the fire sticking his red hands out to get warm.

"Breakfast," you proudly stated. 

"God, no, please y/n, anything but that," Harry groaned as he made his way in. 

"Hey!" You pouted. You couldn't actually be offended, you would have probably ended up giving everyone food poisoning had you gone through with the cooking.

"Don't bully her, she's not that bad of a cook," Tom said as he rounded the corner pulling the beanie from his head to expose his crazy hair. "She makes some mean cookies," Tom reminded them. 

"Oh no," Harry groaned, falling back onto the couch. 

"Baking and cooking are two completely separate things Tom," Sam started. 

"You had to open that can of worms?" Harry asked, looking at Tom. 

"See the science behind-" 

"God! No Sam!" Harry groaned again, making a giggle erupt from your chest. 

"I want to hear Sammy, tell me," you instructed leaning against the counter. Sam shot a cocky look over to Harry before turning and lecturing you for the next thirty minutes on the differences in cooking and baking, and why chefs were not considered bakers and vice versa. By the end you were sitting at the kitchen island as Sam finished the pancakes and bacon. 

"Interesting," you mumbled as he slid a plate of food your way. 

"It truly is," he agreed. You grabbed your fork beginning to eat the food on your plate when you felt a hand on the low of your back. You glanced up with your mouth full to see Tom standing beside you, not even aware of where his hand was placed, or if he was, he wasn't showing it. "Here," Sam said as he slid the plate to him. 

"Thanks Lad," he said as he sat down onto the stool next to you, hand leaving your back as he moved it to grab his fork. He noticed the look on your face of shock. "You alright?" He wondered. 

"Uh- yeah, I'm okay," you nodded, turning your attention back to the food In front of you. 

One single touch and you were completely undone, couldn't even muster the ability to speak. What were you supposed to do for the next week and a half? You weren't sure you could manage… 

"Morning y/n," Clarke said as she walked up behind you. "Morning handsome," she said to Sam.

"Morning beautiful," he said before rounding the counter to giver a quick peck and set a plate In Front of her. "Eat," he instructed. She sat down next to you and started to eat the food. Soon enough everyone had woken up and eaten breakfast. 

"We should go up to the hot springs," Harry said from in front of the fireplace. 

"Awful idea," Harrison laughed. 

"Why?" Gracie asked suddenly. 

"The water is nice and warm, but then when you get out you're still wet and have to hike back down to the cabin, it's miserable," he explained quickly. 

She nodded, "yeah we will pass," 

"Okay," Harry shook his head, "Sam? Clarke?" 

"Yeah we will go," Sam answered. 

"Cool, y/n? Tom?" 

You glanced up from where your nose had been buried In a book having heard your name called with Tom's. "What?" You asked. 

"Hot springs?" 

"Ohh, yeah, I'll go," you sent Harry a smile and glanced over to Tom who had raised brows. 

"Count me in too," he said, not looking away from you. 

"OK, I'll go see about the other two," he announced, jumping to his feet. 

"Don't barge in Baz, you'll see something you don't want to see,"  Harrison laughed, causing everyone else to give a disgusted groan. "What? You all believe they have been "resting" all morning?" He asked. 

"No but you didn't need to say it," Clarke laughed burying her head back into Sam's shoulder. 

Everyone walked ahead of you through the soft snow. The hike up the hill itself wasn't extremely hard, but with the added difficulty of the freshly fallen snow, it seemed to be a much more daunting task. The hot springs were just a little past the sledding hill, and should have only been about a ten minute walk, but you were sure it was easily minute twenty by now. 

Tom could see you struggling, just like old times, he fell back from the rest of the group until you caught up with him. "Here," he said, offering out his arm. 

You grabbed it eagerly, as you attempted to keep your dwindling balance. "thanks," you mumbled as the two of you began to walk. 

"How have you been?" Tom asked quietly. Looking over at your rosy tinted face. 

"Alright, working a lot.. you?" You asked.

"Working," he agreed with a chuckle. 

"The Netflix film was good," you told him.

"You watched that?" He wondered. You could sense the surprise in his voice. 

"Of course Tommy, I've watched everything you have been in," you chuckled. 

You could see from your peripheral vision that his cheeks seemed to get a darker shade of red. "Your favorite?" He asked. 

"Most definitely civil war," you said. "Recognize that butt anywhere," you giggled. 

"Oh shit up," he groaned, rolling his eyes. You couldn't help the nostalgic feel that washed over you

You and Tom trailing behind, lost in your own conversation, while everyone else was way ahead, not minding the two of you. You're not sure how no one ever caught on to the two of you, you were sure, had you been an outsider looking in, it would have been painfully obvious as to what was going on. 

"You remember winter of 17'?" You asked. 

"Hard to forget, we came out here almost every day," Tom chuckled. 

"That year was a good one," you sighed. 

"Winter of 18' was pretty good though," Tom said, glancing over to you. 

"The beginning," you nodded. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-" 

"It's ok Tommy, I know you didn't," you told him, a sudden sadness in your eyes as you cut him off. 

"I wish I could take it back," he whispered. 

"Do things differently?" You asked. 

"Yeah, I wouldn't have hid what we had, you deserved to be shown off to the world, not pulled into the closet Every Time I wanted to kiss you," he explained. 

"Hey," you said, "I have some of my best memories in that potter closet," you teased. 

"Yeah," Tom sighed. "I do to," 

You both walked in a comfortable silence before finally catching up with the others at the natural hot springs, the water letting off a beautiful steam, surrounded by white fluffy snow. 

"It's gorgeous out here!" Clarke exclaimed as she shimmied out of her clothes to rush into the water. 

"Not as gorgeous as you, sweetheart," Sam teased. 

"Blegh," Harry faked a gag. "Stop being so gross," he told his twin. 

"Oh, piss off Baz," Sam quipped back. 

She was right though, it was a gorgeous sight, and it brought back many fond memories to be back. 

"Ok, y/n, craziest sexual experience?" Clark asked as you all settled in the hot water. 

"What?" You asked shocked. 

"She does this, you'll get used to it," Harry told you. 

"Oh, well.. what classifies as crazy?" You asked.

"Public, secret, kinky.. whatever you can think." She explained. 

"Ok, well I guess there was this one time, up at a ski lodge. We were stopped on a trail because someone had eaten it pretty badly, and so we just went behind the trees and-" 

"Y/n!" Tom interrupted. 

You glanced over to him to see his face red in shock, and noticed the other three also had a shocked look on their faces.

"What?" You asked quickly. 

"How do you and Tom have almost an identical story?" Sam asked. 

You felt your stomach tighten up. Of course this hadn't been a new question. You should have just lied and kept the story to yourself. "I.. I don't know," you said pathetically. 

"Y/n.." Harry deadpanned. "Who was it with you at the ski lodge?" 

You felt your face flush even redder, as you didn't know what to say or how to get yourself out of this mess. 

"Oh My God!" Sam exclaimed. "I knew I wasn't fucking crazy," he announced turning to Harry. "I caught Tom sneaking out of Y/n's room one night!" 

"Wait a minute-" Tom interrupted. 

"No. No, you two were shagging," Sam accused with a bony finger pointing at Tom. 

"Sam it's not-" 

"You're not denying it?!" Harry gasped looking back and forth between the two of you. 

You sighed loudly as you looked at Tom, who looked just about as embarrassed as you felt. 

"How long?!" Sam asked. "When did it start?" 

Tom sighed before shooting you an apologetic look. "First time was in 2013," Tom said. 

"2013!? Thomas! You lost your virginity to Y/n?!" Harry exclaimed, completely shocked.

"That was after two years of a lot of kissing and hand stuff," Tom admitted. 

"Tommy!" You exclaimed, throwing him a look. 

"Let me get this straight," Harry chuckled dryly. "The two of you started to mess around at 14 and 15?" 

"More or less," you told him. 

"And you just kept it hidden?" Sam asked. 

"I mean… yeah," Tom admitted. 

"So how long did it last?" Clarke asked. 

"Until the winter after Infinity war," Tom said. 

"Thomas, that's like seven years," Sam pointed out. 

"Well if you count from the first time we kissed then-" 

"Tom stop," you instructed. "Yeah me and Tom, did things, and we hid it because we knew it would cause problems," you explained.

"For who?" Sam asked, confused.

"For us," You told him, "Tom was twenty two and I was twenty one and I told him that I would come with him, but that meant Making things real between us, and leaving the little bubble we had created, so he called it off," you explained. 

"Is that what you think?" Tom asked. 

"No, that's what happened," you told him.

"No, you had just been accepted into uni, and I had to leave for filming, and I told you I didn't want to be without you, so you offered to give up on uni. I couldn't let you do that, I needed you to live out your dream, that's why I called it off," Tom admitted.  

"What?" You asked shocked. 

"You thought this whole time I was scared to commit to you?" Tom wondered.

"Umm, yeah," you admitted. 

"I feel like this is a very private conversation," Clarke whispered to Sam. 

"Shh, it's about to get better," he told her quietly. 

"Y/n, I only did what I did because I was so in love with you," Tom whispered, as he moved closer to you. 

"Tom, you told me and I quote 'you are not enough y/n. You're not worth it'" you reminded him. 

"Only because I couldn't see any other way to get you to let me go, it was wrong, and I shouldn't have said that, because I didn't mean it…" he explained. His eyes were warm and genuine as he brought his hand up to your cheek. "The only thing I ever wanted with you was the real deal. I wanted to bring you home to my parents, even though you grew up knowing them. I wanted to have you on my arm at the premieres and at random galas I have to attend, but I knew that uni was your dream, and you worked so hard for it, I couldn't be the reason you missed out on that," he explained. 

"I graduated early," you blurted without thinking. 

"What?" Tom asked, eyebrows furrowing together. 

"I graduated last month. A year early, I got my bachelor's degree in business," you told him.

"Y/n, that is amazing," he exclaimed, pulling you into his arms. 

"Yeah, I achieved my dream," you mumbled against his chest.  

"That's so great, I'm so proud of you," he told you before Pulling back and crashing his lips into yours, for a moment you nearly forgot about the company that was with you, being completely captivated by his lips on yours. 

"I want to say I didn't see that coming," Sam chuckled. 

"I didn't," Harry admitted. 

"Awweee," Clark exclaimed. 

Tom pulled away, whispering a quick sorry before moving back to sit down, but not letting his hand leave where it rested around your waist. 

You spent the next two hours at the hot springs explaining how you snuck around for so many years without anyone finding out. 

You walked up the steps to the back door of the cabin completely frozen from your wet undergarments underneath your clothes. "I call shower first!" You exclaimed running through the door and straight through the kitchen and the living room towards the stairs. 

"Have fun?" You heard Harrison call out. 

"Frozen solid, I'll answer when I've thawed," you called back. 

You slipped your clothes off before you started the water, letting it warm up. You slipped your chilled body into the warm stream, feeling the pins and needles from the sudden temperature change. 

There was a soft knock on the door before it opened. 

"I'll be fast," you called out not knowing who had come in. 

"You're going to use all the hot water," Tom's voice teased. 

You peaked your head out the curtain seeing him leaning against the counter with a smirk on his face. "I don't take that long," you told him. 

"You know, we could just shower together, save water." He told you. 

"What an environmentalist, you are," you teased. 

"Is that a no?" He Wondered. 

"Did I say no?" You asked, feeling your stomach fill with butterflies. 

You heard him chuckle before the sound of a zipper. "Y/n?" He asked. 

"Yeah, Tommy?" You bit down on your bottom lip waiting anxiously.

"You can tell me to leave, I'd understand it if you didn't want me around," he nearly whispered, fear lacing his tone. 

"Tommy," 

"Yeah y/n?" 

"Better get in here before I use all the hot water," you quipped. You didn't have to tell him again, with one swift motion, the curtain opened just enough for him to slip into the rather small shower. His hands found your waist almost instantly, pushing your body against the cold tile, crashing his lips into yours. It was nothing new, you had done this so many times before, but there was just something different about it. Maybe it was that you hadn't been with him in three years, or maybe it was because now you weren't hiding, or maybe, just maybe, it was because life had finally aligned just right, and it was your time. 

You reached your fingers up to the nape of his neck, fingers twiddling with the curls. His fingers dug into your hips as he pushed his bare body against yours. 

Your skin burned under his touch, a fire blazing inside of you. Tom's lips moved from your mouth down to your jaw and then to your neck. 

"Y/n?" Harrison's voice called out, you hadn't even heard the door open. Tom lifted his head from your neck and you clasped your hand over his mouth. 

"Yeah Haz?" You asked. 

"You and Tom talked?" He wondered. 

"Little bit," you admitted as Tom chuckled, shaking his head. 

"Good, good. Was worried he was going to be a puss and never admit his truths to you," he said, making Tom furrow his brows together. "He can be a real div, ya know. Never knows the right thing to say," at this point you rolled your eyes knowing very well that Harrison was more than aware that Tom was in the shower with you, and was just trying to push his buttons. Which seemed to be working. Tom gripped your wrist pulling your hand from his mouth. 

"Hey mate, while I do love hearing about my flaws," tom said, "I'd really like to make up for losing the last three years here, so unless you're trying to hear that-" 

"I'm going," Harrison chuckled, exiting the bathroom in a rather quick fashion. 

"We will never live this down," you pointed out. 

"Honestly y/n, who cares," he whispered, returning his lips to your neck, sucking slightly on your sweet spot. 

Your fingers laced into his curly hair tugging lightly. "Tommy," you whimpered. 

The thing that had always been so easy between the two of you was that Tom had helped you discover yourself. Everything you had ever wanted, Tom had given you,  he was one one of the most understanding and patient men you had ever met. So as you withered away under his lips on your neck whimpering his name, he knew just what you wanted. 

He slipped his hand from where it was placed on your hip, down to your aching core. 

"Right here, darling?" He asked as he pushed his knee between your legs, giving him enough room to slip his hand between your thighs. 

"Please," you begged. His fingers slid seamlessly through your already soaking folds. 

"Always so good for me," he whispered into your ear, making your knees feel weak. 

He trailed his fingers through your folds and right up to your clit, rubbing slight circles on the little bundle of nerves. You dropped your head to his shoulder, letting out a moan. 

"Tommy- s..So good," you told him before he gently pushed a finger in. 

"Still so tight I see," he whispered, slipping another finger in. 

You lifted your head Back up, crashing your lips into his. His tongue swiped across your bottom lip, and you eagerly gave him access. It was a heated mess of teeth clashing as neither of you seemed to be able to get enough of the other. Tom curled his fingers inside you, making you gasp as he found the right spot. You threw your head back, hitting the tile wall a little harder than you intended.

"Right there?" He asked. 

"Mhmm," you panted as you felt the band in your belly getting ready to snap. 

"Want you to let go, pretty girl, can you do that for me?" He asked.

His words pushed you over the edge, hips moving on their own accord as a pornographic moan left your mouth.  

"That's it my pretty girl," Tom cooed as he worked you through the high, eyes never leaving you. 

As soon as your legs quit shaking and the quiet whimpers stopped leaving your lips, Tom pulled his hand from where it had been between your legs, bringing the two fingers he had buried inside you up to his mouth and sucking them clean. 

"Christ Tom," you groaned. 

"Was that good princess?" He asked.

"So good," you nodded, pushing your lips back against his.

KNOCK* KNOCK* 

"Y/n! You're going to use all the hot water!" Sam called through the door. 

"Probably should get out," Tom chuckled. 

"Yeah," you agreed. 

You turned the water off, quickly hopping out and wrapping a towel around your wet body, Tom doing the same thing. 

You picked up your clothes before opening the bathroom door to Sam standing there, waiting. Your cheeks went rosy as you walked out of the bathroom first. 

"Sorry," you mumbled, making your way down the hall to your room. Tom stepped out with his clothes, turning down the opposite side of the hall to his room. 

"In the shower?!" Sam groaned. 

"Sorry mate," Tom chuckled. 

You got to your bedroom, dropping your soiled clothes into the hamper before rummaging around for some comfy warm clothes. You settled on an old hoodie that you had stashed in the wardrobe (you were pretty sure it was once toms) and a nice pair of fuzzy pajama pants. 

You collapsed onto your bed, hair still wet and mind going a million miles an hour. Your door creaked open, and you didn't even have to look up to know who it was. 

"You alright?" Tom asked. 

"More than alright," you answered, not even looking over to him. 

"So you graduated?" He asked. 

You propped yourself up on your elbows. "I did," you nodded. 

He nodded, a smile spreading over his face. "What are you doing now?" He wondered. 

"Haven't really decided yet," you admitted. It was the truth, you had barely moved your stuff out of your dorm and back to your parents house, you weren't sure exactly what you were planning to do. 

"Can I throw you an idea?" Tom asked. 

"Please," you giggled. 

He walked over, plopping down on your bed, pulling you into his lap so you were straddling him. 

"Come with me," he whispered. 

"Where?" You giggled, wrapping your fingers in his hair. 

"Anywhere, everywhere, just stay with me?" He begged. 

You leaned forward resting your forehead to his and sighing."Tommy, I never wanted to leave you in the first place," you admitted. 

"I love you," he told you, looking into your eyes, with his honey golden brown ones. 

"I love you," you whispered. Tom leaned more into you, lips searching for yours. His hands grasped your ass as he pressed your lips together eagerly. It was like he said, you had to make up for the lost three years. 

You let yourself get lost in Tom's lips, feeling like a lovesick teenager all over again. You rocked your hips against his as you kissed, feeling him growing beneath you. 

You continued your movements, pressing your core harder against his growing bulge, making him groan into the kiss. You knew what you were doing, bringing Tom to the point of no return.   

“Y/n” Tom groaned into your lips. 

“What is it, pretty boy?” you asked as you let your lips travel down to his neck, nibbling and sucking on all the exposed skin. 

“I want you,” he whispered, hands running up and down your covered back.  

“You have me,” you chuckled against his skin, “You have always had every bit of me,” Tom clutched your ass as he flipped you on your back, returning his lips to yours in a demanding, intention filled kiss. His hands traveled to the hem of the hoodie, before he pulled it up lightly. You sat up pulling it over your head and tossing it to the end of the bed. Tom doing the same with the shirt he had on, before finding his way back to your body. 

“God i have fucking missed you,” Tom groaned as he trailed his lips from yours to the valley of your breasts, pausing at each one to pay your nipples attention. You groaned as his lips enveloped the hardening bud, while he took the other in his fingers. He knew what you liked and how you liked it, and he knew how to get you right to the point he wanted… you begging for him. He moved his lips farther down your abdomen, sucking gently before making it to the bend of your pajama pants. He hooked his fingers into the waistband, shooting you a look, waiting for confirmation. You quickly nodded. He pulled the pants down your legs painfully slowly as he drank in the sight of your body. 

“So perfect,” he complimented as he took the pants from around your ankles, dropping them to the floor. He had your leg in his grasp and took the opportunity to place a kiss on your ankle, trailing them gently and slowly up your legs, making the ace you felt in your core intensify dramatically. “Oh Tommy,” you groaned as he placed a kiss on your bundle of nerves. 

“What is it, love?” He asked innocently from between your legs. 

“Tommy please,” you let out, fingers intertwined in his messy curls. “Please fuck me,” you begged. 

You saw the smirk flash across his face as he pushed himself up from in between your legs crashing his lips into yours. You reached down as you eagerly attempted to rid him of his sweats, failing miserably in the heat of the moment. “I've got it,” he chuckled as he peeled the fabric from his body, freeing his aching cock, from the hold of the fabric. Just the sight of him there, naked, between your legs, hand wrapped around his hard member was mouthwatering. 

“Ready,'' he asked as he ran his tip through your soaking folds. You nodded eagerly as he slowly sank into you, stretching you beautifully. 

Three years, but it was still like muscle memory. Your hands grasped at Tom's neck as your legs snaked around his waist. “Want me to be gentle?” He asked as he bottomed out. 

“We have the rest of our lives to be gentle,” you told him. “But right now,” you lifted your lips to his ear as you nibbled on his lobe gently. “I want you to wreck me,” You whispered, making a guttural groan leave his lips before he began thrusting into you. 

Your head fell back onto the bed as tom pounded into you, back arching from the mattress as each stroke of his cock brushed eagerly on your g spot. You could feel yourself already clenching around him. Barely any time and you were already about to give in. 

Tom's movements slowed suddenly as he brought his lips to yours and kissed you. “I'm sorry, y/n, you'll never know how sorry I am,” he whispered. 

You couldn't stop the tears from rushing to your eyes at the sentiment behind his words, knowing how sincere he actually was. 

“I forgive you Tommy,” you whispered, kissing him deeper. His movements quickened once again, as he pushed you closer and closer to the edge. “Tommy,” you whimpered as you felt your walls begin to clench around him. 

“Me too baby,” he groaned as you felt him twitch inside of you. You brought your lips back to him as you both fell over the edge, a beautiful symphony of pure ecstasy taking over both of your bodies. 

Tom fell beside you, arm draped over you as you both laid there, chests heaving and legs shaking. “Can't believe I lasted three years without you,” Tom mumbled. 

“I don't know how you did it,” you teased. 

“Y/N,” He said seriously. You looked at him with furrowed brows. “I was serious, come with me, be with me?” you felt the breath hitch in your throat as you watched the nervousness take over him, awaiting your answer. 

“Yes,” you whispered as your head nodded. Tom's face lit up as he pulled your body against his, lips clashing again, but in a different way, a way that felt like it would be forever. An unspoken promise being sealed between two people desperately in love after all this time. 

taglist:

@violetlilysunshine  

@petesrparker

@harryhollandsgirlfriend

@mcushvft

@elishi03

@nelebynele

@sunwardsss

[bumblesimagines]

Green Thumb

Part 20

Request: Yes or No

~

"Time travel sounds fun until you see how cringy you used to be." You said, watching Nebula fix some things on the suit Scott had on.

"I've never been cringy." Scott said. You stayed silent in response, glancing at Rhodes. Scott blinked, scoffing softly as you giggled.

"You're great, Scott." You gave a tired smile. Bruce went to put in the red capsules.

"Hey- Hey, be careful!"

"I'm being very careful." Bruce replied.

"No, you're being very Hulky." Scott put in the capsules himself. Even if Bruce was careful, he could still crush whatever was in there without even thinking about it. It was weird seeing Bruce in Hulks body but you supposed it helped end the beef they had. Scott and Bruce went back and forth until he turned small and big in a second.

"Alright, one test run." Scott gave a sheepish smile, glancing at everyone in the room. "I'm not ready for this."

"I'm game." You turned your head, looking at Clint. You crossed your arms, a soft sigh leaving you.

"I'll do it." Clint shrugged. Scott licked his lips, looking at Bruce. Bruce gave him a small nod so Scott walked out of the room to change out of the suit. Clint followed.

"So.. He got a new tattoo." Rhodes glanced at you. You licked your lips, shrugging lightly. Rhodes sighed, leaving the room momentarily before returning with some twizzlers. He offered one to you, giving a small smile. You took it, taking a small bite from it as Clint walked into the room with the suit on. Nebula made sure everything was good with the suit.

"Clint, you're gonna feel a little discombobulated from the shift. Don't worry about it." Bruce told him.

"Wait, wait.. Let me ask you something. If we can do this, you know go back in time, why don't we just find baby Thanos and just.." Rhodes made a wrapping and squeezing motion.

"I mean, it's a solid idea. Baby Thanos was probably real ugly anyways." You said, chewing on the candy. Bruce stared at you and Rhodes in disbelief.

"First of all, that's horrible-"

"It's Thanos."

"And secondly, time doesn't work that way. Changing the past doesn't change the future."

"We go back and get the stones before Thanos gets them.. Thanos doesn't get the stones!" Scott said, shrugging. Rhodes nodded, motioning to him.

"Problem solved!"

"Bingo." Clint nodded as Nebula glanced at them, giving a small shake of her head.

"That's not how it works." She muttered.

"Anyways, who told you that?"

"Star Trek, Terminator, Time Cop, Time After Time, Wrinkle in Time, Hot Tub Time Machine-"

"So, any movie with time in the name." You said with a chuckle.

"Well, it doesn't work like that. If you travel to the past, that past becomes your future and your former present becomes your past." Bruce explained. You hummed, continuing to munch on the twizzler.

"If time travel works.. That means there's different versions of ourselves in different.. Dimensions, right? Like living things we've lived and making decisions we'll eventually make?"

"Yes, actually." Bruce nodded, glad that at least someone was getting it.

"For example, my past self might be in Sokovia fighting Ultron right now while my future self might be relaxing on a beach." Bruce said with a shrug. You hummed, nodding.

"I wonder what my future self is doing.."

"Probably getting therapy instead of napping and drinking." Rhodes muttered, glancing at you. You scoffed softly.

"You drink?" Clint questioned, brows furrowing as a frown tugged at his lips. You shifted your gaze back to the man you used to call dad and shrugged.

"Occasionally." Once the suit was good to go and Bruce had told Clint everything he needed to do, you followed the guys and Nebula to the platform Rocket had built. It was surprising how much a raccoon could built. You glanced at Thor, giving him a small nod. Bruce walked up to the controls, the others standing behind him as they watched Clint stand in the center.

"Alright, Clint.. We're going in three.. Two.." You could tell Clint was nervous, you were too. Despite everything, he had still been someone who took you in and loved you. You slowly chewed on the twizzler, gaze flickering around the platform. To Clint it could feel like hours but it would merely be seconds for you and the others. Clint suddenly appeared, falling on the ground. The helmet retracted as he panted. Natasha quickly rushed up onto the platform with you following incase he had injuries. Natasha helped him up, getting him grounded as Clint looked around.

"I saw her... I saw Lila again.." Clint panted. You stared at him, swallowing as your grip on the twizzler tightened. Clint tossed a baseball glove at Tony, nodding.

"It worked." Clint said. A sense of relief filled you along with everyone. There was a chance at getting everyone back. The team turned, heading to an office in order to talk more and come up with a game plan. You finished your twizzler, taking a seat and watching Tony pull up pictures of the stones.

"We gotta find out the when and the where." Steve said, looking over all of the stones.

"Almost everyone in this room has had at least one encounter with an infinity stone." Steve turned his attention onto everyone. You supposed Vision counted as an encounter.

"Or substitute encounter by being damn near killed by one of the stones." Tony added, shrugging as he sipped on his coffee.

"I haven't." Scott piped in. "I have no clue what the hell you're talking about."

"Regardless, we only have enough pinparticles for one trip each and these stones have been in a lot of different places throughout history." Bruce said, slowly walking around the office.

"Our history." Tony reminded him. "So, not alot of convenient spots to drop in."

"Which means we'll have to pick our targets." Clint muttered. Tony nodded, shooting him the side eye. You cocked a brow when you made eye contact with Tony. Tony simply patted your shoulder.

"Let's start with the ether. Thor, what do you know?" Steve asked, everyones' attention shifting onto the god of lighting. Thor sat in a corner, coke bottle in hand and sunglasses on.

"Is he asleep?" Natasha asked after Thor didn't answer. You stared at him. The last five years had definitely been rough for him.

"Pretty sure he's dead." Rhodes mumbled. You sighed, reaching forward and grabbing a cup of water. You made it turn ice cold before tossing it at the god. Thor jolted awake, looking down at his wet shirt.

"Thor, the reality stone. What do you know about it?" Steve asked again, watching him stand and approach the picture of the reality stone. You listened to Thors' rambling, turning to look at Tony. Scott was the only one interested in what he had to say. Tony approached him, urging him to sit.

"Alright.. Who's next?"

~~~~~~~~~~

You stared at the pictures. Three stones in New York, one in Asgard, and the other two in Morag. You looked at Steve as he approached the hologram.

"Alright, we have a plan. Six stones, three teams. One shot." Steve said. You swallowed, glancing at Rocket and Thor. You had been assigned on their team. Just in case. You stood up with the others, going off to change. You stared at the two pictures in your locker. One of the Barton family and the other of the Stark family. You headed towards the platform after changing, standing beside Thor and Rocket.

"Stay safe." Natasha said softly, giving your arm a squeeze. Steve gave a pep talk before you put your helmet on. You absolutely hated the feeling as you went through what looked like a blue tunnel. When you blinked, you were in Asgard. Thor held a finger up to his lips, passing by a room. You followed, glancing back and seeing his brother. You had never officially met Loki but he was an odd dude. You reached a hall, standing besides Thor. You listened to the women talk in the hall. You shared a look with Rocket.

"There's Jane." Thor whimpered, shaking his head. Rocket sighed.

"Alright.." Rocket hopped off the stone block, looking at you and Thor.

"You're gonna charm her, (Y/N) will be our lookout, and I'll poke her with this thing, get the stone, and we'll be gone." Rocket said, watching Thor. You gave a nod but Thor sniffled.

"I'll be right back. The wine cellar is just down here. My father used to have this huge barrel of ale." You stared at Thor, letting out a sigh as you scratched your forehead. You heard a door opening and quickly ducked besides Rocket.

"Yes, and could you also let me know when Gaia plans on visiting again?" You blinked, feeling your body freeze. You slowly stood, glancing at Thor as he slowly walked down the hall, gaze on the woman.

"Who's the fancy woman?" Rocket asked, hopping onto the stone. You swallowed, turning your head and looking at the woman.

"That's my mother..." Thor answered. Your eyes slightly widened, turning to face Thor. You opened your mouth to ask him a question.

"She dies today." Thor whispered. You shut your mouth, frowning. You licked your lips, gaze flickering around.

"How.. How does she know Gaia?" You asked softly. Thor glanced at you with furrowed brows.

"She was a friend of my mothers'." Thor answered. He looked back at where his mother had been, shaking his head.

"I can't do this." He breathed out, beginning to pant softly. You and Rocket faced him. Rocket told Thor to get closer as Thor rambled. You blinked as Rocket slapped him, almost laughing at the sight of a raccoon slapping a god.

"You think you're the only one who lost people? What do you think we're doing here? I lost the only family I ever had. Same with nature boy over here. I get you miss your mom, but she's gone. Really gone and there are plenty of people who are kind of gone. You can help them. So is it too much to ask that you brush the crumbs out of your beard, talk to the girl, and when she's not looking, suck the infinity stone and help us get our families back?" Rocket stared at him. Thor nodded, a small whimper leaving him as his eyes watered.

"Thor, calm down." You said softly, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "You're the god of lighting, Thor. You can do this."

"Yeah, yeah, I can." Thor nodded. You gave him a small smile, following Raccoon towards the door. You turned, hearing footsteps rushing away. You sighed.

"He's gone." You muttered. Rocket groaned softly.

"You go after him. I'll go get the stone." Rocket said, turning around and walking towards the room.

"I don't know this place." You huffed, looking at the talking raccoon. Rocket let out an exasperated sigh.

"Be my lookout." He mumbled. You walked towards the room Jane was in, watching Rocket enter. You stood infront of the doors, gaze flickering around. You had no idea what you were gonna do if somebody asked you what you were doing. You swallowed, glancing in the direction Thors' mother had gone in.

"He'll be fine." You assured yourself, speedwalking in the direction. You spotted Thor, quietly walking towards him.

"Thor-"

"Shh." He brought up a finger to his lips. Thor grabbed you, keeping you hidden behind the pillar as his mother passed by. She dismissed her girls. You and Thor peeked around the corner.

"What are you doing?" You flinched, letting out a yelp as a woman yelped as well. You turned and faced her, watching her look at Thor. Thor suddenly grabbed you, covering you with his jacket.

"You're better off leaving the sneaking to your brother." The woman said, head tilting.

"What are you wearing? Who is this?" She asked, stepping forward. You swatted Thor's arm away, clearing your throat.

"Uhm, I'm- I'm (Y/N)." You said. Rocket was gonna kill you.

"Frigga." She gave a polite smile. "What are you wearing?" Friggas' brows furrowed, looking Thor over. Frigga slowly approached her son, placing a hand on his cheek. Thor rambled slightly. Frigga smiled softly.

"You're not the Thor I know, are you?" She asked softly.

"Yes I am."

"The future hasn't been kind to you, has it?" She gently brushed some hair out of his face. You watched her, gaze softening. You could see why Thor loved his mother so much. They shared a tight hug, something Thor had desperately needed.

"Let's talk." Frigga smiled. You tuned out as Thor spoke to his mother. You walked around her room, looking over the glass. You licked your lips, looking over at them.

"How do you know Gaia?" You asked softly. Frigga turned to look you curiously.

"Like, uhm, Thor told me but I.. I wanna know more." You said, facing her. Frigga tilted her head, slowly approaching you.

"Gaia? What would you want with her?"

"She's my mother and she.. She kind of abandonded me." You shrugged lightly, letting out a small awkward laugh. Frigga hummed, gaze softening.

"Gaia's in.. It's hard to explain. She's in The Garden. She lives there and it's how she watches over her creations." Frigga explained.

"How do I get there?"

"Fairy rings. Only certain people have access to her portals." Frigga said. You nodded, keeping it in mind. Thor stood, approaching you and his mom.

"Mother, I must tell you something-"

"No, Thor." Frigga turned to face her son, pressing a finger to his lips.

"Mother-"

"Guys!" Rocket shouted, running towards you. "You were supposed to watch the door!"

"I know." You gave an apologetic smile. Rocket shook his head, showing the stone.

"I got it." He breathed out. "Oh, hey, you must be mom."

"I wish we had more time." Thor said softly. Frigga smiled gently, grabbing his hands.

"This was a gift. Now you go and be the man you were meant to be." Frigga said softly. Thor gave her a sad smile.

"I love you, mom."

"I love you." Frigga hugged Thor tightly. She pulled back and smiled. Rocket began to count but Thor stopped him. He extended his hand towards the balcony area. You and Rocket shared a look.

"W-What are we looking at?" He asked.

"It takes a second." Frigga chuckled softly. Thors hammer returned to him, making him beam. You smiled softly as the suit returned.

"Nice meeting you." You said.

"Same here." Frigga smiled, giving a small wave. The helmet came on and you went back through the nauseating blue tunnel. You grunted, shutting your eyes tightly.

"Yeah, fuck that." You muttered, rubbing your forehead. You looked around, noticing Clint fall to his knees with teary eyes.

"Where's Nat?"

~~~~~

Tags: @geek-and-proud @wolfelocksley @babyvisionisamenace @jjk-is-my-shit

[hellotvshowtrash]

Obey pt. 3

Part 3 time!!! Not too much happens in this chapter, but I really like it tbh. Also once again posting from mobile so sorry if the formatting is weird.

Word count: 1.8k

Warnings: swearing

*tbh this gif is 100% Elijah laughing at drunken reader in this chap.*

Credit to gif owner

The cool night air was welcomed on her flushed skin. She started her trek home robotically, only getting a few yards away when she was stopped. "Let me walk you home, you're drunk and it could be dangerous," Elijah grabbed her arm from behind, gently pulling her to look back at him.

"I think I'm okay, thanks though," she said, "I walk this route pretty often. Besides, I'm not even really drunk anymore. You took care of that." She winked at him and turned back to continue walking, but he held her arm firm in his grasp.

"I insist," he said with more authority.

She slowly turned back to him, eyebrows raised. "You insist? You insist on following me back to my house so you can know where I live? You don't call the shots here," she pointed her index finger onto his chest. Anger clouded her features, no longer the seductress she had been. She had switched into survival mode in the blink of an eye. Elijah released her arm, surprised.

"Y/N," he muttered, "I overheard two men in the bar talking about following you." He looked into her eyes, "now I insist you let me walk you home," her eyes widened as he spoke, and then she shook her head quickly.

"Only because you heard those guys." She searched his eyes for the truth, but she found confusion instead. She began to walk again quickly, not waiting for him to catch up even though he did very quickly. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye.

"I should tell you.. I don't normally do that sort of thing," he said, trying to strike up a conversation.

She snorted in response, "Yeah, well, I do." And she rolled her eyes. Usually her flings were easier than this. They'd let her go without a fight. But it seemed like Elijah wanted to be around her. Her heart started to warm at the possibility that someone might care enough to break through her walls until she crushed that thought and reminded herself of her vow. "No one will ever treat me like that again," her thoughts seemed loud and Elijah looked at her.

"What did you say?" He whispered to her. She looked at him, confused and realized she had spoken her vow aloud. His eyes held a type of curious concern, and she couldn't decipher his intentions. That infuriated her.

"Nothing, just.. just stop talking," she clenched her fists. She was becoming uneasy with the amount of time she was spending with the man, after already achieving her goal with him. Elijah grabbed her arm and the memory of that night all those years ago flashed in her mind again for a quick second. She pulled her arm away with a gasp. She looked at him, the emotional pain evident on her face. His eyes held horror and pity, almost as if he remembered the memory with her. Fire burned in her as eyes she looked at him. Elijah had never been scared of a human before, but this one would do what it took to survive. A few tense seconds passed before her shoulders fell and she continued walking.

"I'm too tired for this right now," she said quietly. Pulling himself together, Elijah followed. He matched her pace and stuffed one of his hands into his suit pants pocket.

"I live close to here, if you would li-", he started but Y/N cut him off with a glare.

"I don't know who you think you are, but this," she stopped again and pointed back and forth between them "was a one time thing. I plan on never seeing you again. Thanks for some good dick, but I'm done with you now. I can make it home perfectly fine by myself."  She started walking once again. This time Elijah held back and raised his eyebrows as he watched her go. He was intrigued by her, by her past and he wanted to know more.

She on the other hand, had no interest in him whatsoever, although... he had something weird about him. The way he tried to command her to do things, and then seemed confused or annoyed when she didn't immediately comply. Or the blood on her neck after their sexcapade in the bathroom. She touched her hand to her neck as she walked and felt the puncture wounds that had started to scab. Handsome, and charming and dark. She didn't fear him by any means, she was determined to never fear a man again, but there was something dark within him and she didn't know if she had the means to combat it.

She looked over her shoulder as she walked home, and he was gone.

—

"So, who is Elijah?" Y/N asked drunkenly. It was toward last call at the bar a few weeks later and Sophie was wiping down the hard wood surface. Sophie rolled her eyes and looked at Y/N.

"You're here, drunk, asking about some guy instead of going home with your newest conquest. What gives?" Sophie took the empty glass that was between them and put it behind the bar. "Besides, if I told you who he is, you wouldn't believe me." Sophie said, quieter than before.

"I'm just interested, is all. He showed me a good time," Y/N slurred. She had lied to herself. She was interested and she couldn’t stop thinking about him.

"He's not your type. Actually, I don't think you have a type. You’ll fuck just about any man that breathes," Sophie grumbled.

The comment stung Y/N and she furrowed her eyebrows, "did someone shit in your Cheerios this morning? You're being a bitch," Sophie's jaw dropped as Y/N spoke. Y/N didn’t feel bad in the slightest.

"Out. Now." Sophie pointed at the door of the bar. Y/N started laughing as if Sophie was joking. "Get out."

Y/N stopped laughing and her face fell. "Aww come on, Soph. I'm just drunk it's fine," Y/N started to move off of her bar stool and tripped, almost tumbling to the ground. She started laughing again as Sophie stood her ground and watched her leave. Y/N stumbled onto the city street in the dark morning. Still laughing to herself, she began her walk home. She tripped over her own feet and began to fall to the ground, extending her arms out to catch herself, but the ground never came. Instead, a pair of strong arms wrapped around her. She looked up and saw two handsome, identical men. No, there was only one, she clarified for herself. She was much more drunk than she thought she was.

"Llllijah?" She slurred. He sighed and brought her back up to her feet.

"You're lucky I happened to be passing by," he told her.

"I can take care of m'self," she said, her eyes partially closed. He couldn't help but smile at how feisty she was, even in her current state. She pulled away from him and started walking again. "What, are you stalking me?" She spun around to face him, attempting to walk backwards and successfully falling on her butt in the middle of the street. Elijah rolled his eyes as she laid down on the ground, groaning. "Mm llliijah, look at the stars!" She weakly lifted her hand, pointing loosely at the sky. Elijah looked up toward the sky and was astonished to be able to see the stars so well. He looked back down at Y/N, her eyes glued to the stars. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, already regretting what he was about to do. He stripped off his suit jacket put it over Y/N as he lowered himself to the cold street ground to lay next to her. He folded his hands behind his head and looked up at the stars with her.

"I've been thinking about you lately," he said to her quietly. She stayed still, continuing to look at the stars. A small diamond of a tear slid down her cheek but went unseen as Elijah continued. "I don't know you. And you don't know me. But, I think I'd like to take the time to know you," he slowly reached his hand to meet hers. She jerked her hand away and stood hastily, breathing fast. The coat slid off of her and unto the ground.

"Elijah, I don't know who you think you are. I am wild. I am fire. I am my own, and I will never be anyone's, ever again." her fight or flight response had sobered her up rather quickly and the fire in her eyes burned brightly. Elijah got up from the street, moving slowly.

"I quite enjoy your wild ferocity," he put his hands up in defense, trying to slowly move toward her. "I don't want you to be afraid or in pain," The walls around her heart were tall and dense, and he had the urge to tear them down and see her as she truly was. He couldn't help but feel that she would make one hell of a vampire.

Her chest rose and fell heavily. The single tear she had shed turned to multiple streaming down her cheeks and she ignored them. His eyes held a promise to her, one she didn't understand and was frustrated with. He owed her nothing, she owed him nothing. They were nothing. They were just two strangers. "I am not afraid of you. I'm not afraid of anyone. If anything, I'm the one people should be afraid of," she lifted her head defiantly.

His eyes held hers, his promise still in them. A glint of amusement flashed on his face. "I should be afraid of you?" He practically laughed at the idea and truth be told, Y/N’s bravery was faltering. He used to seem harmless, noble, a gentleman. As the conversation progressed, he seemed to become devilish and dark. Simultaneously dangerous and attractive. He took a step toward her but she held her ground, her chin still raised. He lifted his hand to her cheek and caressed her soft skin. She almost melted into his warm touch but held her ground. "You are fire. You are wild. You are your own. But I would like you to be mine as well," he wrapped his free arm around her waist, his other hand still caressing her cheek. She gasped and held onto him, suddenly off balance. Their eye contact hadn't broken once. "Let me show you what you could have if you chose me."

She puffed her chest out as he held her, recomposing herself. "I am not one to be tamed, Elijah. I wasn't born to obey or to let someone else be in control. I'm the one calling the shots here, not you." His eyes grew darker, and she couldn't tell if she was seeing things in the moonlight or if they had actually changed colours.

He leaned down, his face level with hers now and he breathed gently into her ear. He spoke softly, almost a whisper.

"Are you challenging me?"

-

Always taglist: @elijahs-wife @dumble-daddy @soul-revoir @akshi8278

Obey taglist: @njeancastro316 @alien-sida-2 @mikaelson-emma @raemikaelson @kpopgirlbtssvt @within-thehollowcrown @its-a-simply-me-thing bold means tumblr wouldn’t let me tag you!

[typewriting-angel]

Uncle Jim

A/N: This is the first installment of my Star Trek obsession, but don't worry, I'mma still write Star Wars. I just gotta broaden my horizons...

Word Count: 647

Warnings: It's fluffy fluff, but it's possibly really terrible.

Tags: none

You walked down the halls of the USS Enterprise with your seven month old daughter in your arms. She was the light of the whole crew’s life, especially her godfather, the captain. Jim had agreed to take her for an hour while you did the botany department’s yearly personnel review. You would have had your husband take Ophelia, but he was working the Beta shift today.

The little star started to wriggle in your grip, notifying you that she was in need of a nap. Ophelia spit out her pacifier and became vocal. Her nonsense babble was accompanied by a little bit of drool falling onto the spotless floor. “How interesting, starlight.” You replied as the bridge doors slid open.

A small squeal filled the main control room of the ship, provided by the mini human you were holding. All the attention was brought to baby Ophelia, who was immediately smothered in love by Uhura and her Uncle Jimmy. “Hi starshine! Oh, look at you!” Uhura took her from you, soaking up all the baby time she could get.

You handed Jim the papoose to hold her in, “Thank you so much. I owe you a lot, Captain. She just needs a nap, if anything happens, I have my comm.” Out of the side of your eye, you saw Spock caressing her strawberry blonde locks.

Jim smiled and pulled on the contraption, “No need to thank me, I should be thanking you, Y/N. I can finally get some time with my little star. And I think Uhura might steal your girl.” He laughed as you walked away to retrieve the mini human.

You could breathe easy for just a few minutes before you had to tackle the hell storm that was the botany team. Everything would be fine, your daughter was in the hands of the most capable captain in all of Starfleet and the command crew.

Everything was not fine. The one thing James Tiberius Kirk didn't know how to deal with was a crying baby, especially the baby of his chief botany officer. He tried taking her out and bouncing her for a while, that didn't work. Walking around bridge didn't help, it just agitated the poor baby. She didn't need a diaper change and wouldn't take a replicated bottle. Jim was out of ideas and was about to just take the baby down to her father when she started to crawl.

The bridge became quiet and watched as Ophelia wormed her way around. Her cries turned to incoherent murmurs that Jim responded to. He slowly followed her as she explored, making sure she didn't bite anyone's ankles. But soon enough, the Enterprise's star became tuckered out and rubbed her hazel eyes.

Uncle Jim put her in the papoose, holding her close to his heart. He found himself paying attention not to Chekov’s words, but to the amazing little thing he was proud to called his goddaughter. He always loved his women, but this was a gift. The blond man noticed she was wearing a miniature version of his uniform, a golden onesie with “Captain’s Boss” scrawled on the front. He chuckled and kissed her little head.

“Captain, are you with us?” Chekov asked before he spun around and saw the special bonding moment. “I'm going to take that as a no.”

What brought the captain to his senses was the mother of his most prized crew member coming back into the bridge. You were going to exchange the PADD in your hand for your baby, but you doubted Jim was going to give her up anytime soon. It was endearing to see the captain so captivated by such a small thing. He was going to spoil the hell out of Ophelia and love her with his whole being. He might be Uncle Jim to her, but she had just become his whole world.

[knightotoc]

16 new Asimovs!

And 6 other scifi/fantasy books!

The Last Unicorn: a 2008 Roc 40th anniversary edition, featuring a unicorn by Sergey Prygov in a design by Elizabeth Phillips. It's a rather plain cover, but for some reason book covers almost always look plain nowadays...

EXCEPT for this outrageous cover of Jekyll and Hyde: a 2022 Pierian Springs Press edition, featuring digital screaming faces and guns by sarawut wongwian and kdshutterman (who seem to be more stock photo profiles than people). Is it better to be boring or ugly? I really don't know.

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?: a misleading 1996 HarperCollins edition which features Drew Struzan's beautiful movie poster. The words Blade Runner are not in book.

The Man Who Fell to Earth: a 1981 Bantam Books edition which does not credit the artist of its intricate and accurate cover. Fortunately ISFDB comes through once again -- it was Jim Burns.

Mockingbird: a 1999 Del Rey edition, with an accurate but rather awkward cover by David Stevenson.

The Three-Body Problem: a 2019 Tor Book edition; the cool cover art by Stephan Martiniere is mostly hidden behind text. The Netflix advertisement was printed over one of the three titular suns, which makes it look like there are only two bodies, or perhaps four if you also count the Hugo award.

Four collections of short stories:

The Bicentennial Man: a 1976 Doubleday Book Club Edition with a groovy jacket by Peter Rauch.

The Winds of Change: a 1984 Ballantine Books with a stunning, colorful cover by Don Dixon that parallels an eagle and a spaceship. I'm not sure which story it illustrates; my guess is "The Last Shuttle."

Earth is Room Enough: an ancient 1959 Bantam Books edition that arrived in a plastic cover (not pictured). Tragically, neither the book nor ISFDB identifies the incredible artist behind this wacky, Terry Gilliam-y cover.

Nine Tomorrows: a 1959 (?) Fawcett Crest edition with a creepy, bizarre cover by Paul Lehr (according to ISFDB, not the book itself). Book covers sure love tall buildings from a distance -- they're the perfect size, I suppose. This is one of my favorite Asimovs, but I'll have to reread it to guess which story the cover is illustrating.

Two non-fiction books, and one collection of short stories by other authors:

View from a Height: a 1963 Lancer Books edition; no credit is given for the simple but vivid cover design.

Twentieth Century Discovery: a revised 1976 edition (that's only 3/4 of a century, but alright) by Ace Books; there is unfortunately no artist credited for the excellent oil portrait and space scene.

Isaac's Universe: a 1990 Avon Books edition with a fun, classy cover by Martin Andrews. I haven't read any of these three books before.

Two Foundation novels:

Foundation: the 13th printing, 1971 Avon Books edition with an extremely cool cover, full of obscure but accurate references, by Don Ivan Punchatz (who also painted the iconic Doom cover art). Thanks to Retro Book Covers .com for the credit, since it's not in the book itself.

Foundation and Empire: oddly renamed The Man Who Upset the Universe, this ancient Ace Books edition only shows the original 1952 copyright, though ISFDB says it's from 1963. They've also identified the artist as Robert E. Schulz -- it's a strange and not especially accurate cover, but I really love it. Someone behind this edition really wanted to focus on the villain, and I can't blame them at all.

Three standalone novels:

The End of Eternity, my favorite Asimov: a third Lancer edition from 1968, featuring a brilliant tagline and a stunning painting by Frank Kelly Freas (thanks again to ISFDB for figuring that out). As much as I love the Star Trek TMP meets Modern Times design, I'm a bit disappointed that he gave Noÿs the wrong hair color (my mom's publishers did that to her book cover too!).

The Currents of Space: a 1971 Fawcett Crest edition with a creepy, ethereal cover by Allan Mardon. The book didn't credit him, but I was able to read his signature.

Pebble in the Sky: a 1964 Bantam Pathfinder edition with a jawdropping, emotional cover. I'm heartbroken that the artist is uncredited in the book and unknown online, since this is my favorite cover I got today.

Four Robot novels:

I, Robot: a 1970 Fawcett Crest edition with a charming cover by John Berkey (identified once again by an articulate signature). It's very Star Wars-y, which is probably why I love it so much.

Another I, Robot: a 1992 (?) Bantam edition with a silly cover by Stephen Youll (according to ISFDB). These 90s covers are alright, but I prefer the fuzzier older ones.

The Naked Sun: Daneel Olivaw has never looked so miserable as he does on this 1972 Fawcett Crest edition. ISFDB guesses the artist is Dean Ellis; it's a great picture, even though the title and illustration contradict each other on the time of day.

The Caves of Steel: a 1968 Pyramid Books edition, featuring Daneel Olivaw in an apparent fight with Spider-man. No artist is credited, but ISFDB extrapolated the artist's name, Ed Emshwiller, from the trace of his signature between "of" and "steel." This picture is wonderful; it's like if a Jack Kirby collage got shaken up and set on an angle. These are all four of my favorite colors.

I found all the Asimovs on audiobook originally, but I've been slowly collecting the physical books at thrift stores. I prefer the weird old covers to the plain modern ones you can get at B&N, and these old versions often have interesting ads for more books at the end or funny dedications at the front. I half-love and half-hate how mismatched they are, but the excitement of finding a new one outweighs my other feelings.

Prelude: a cracked-binding October 1991 Bantam reissue, with a cheesy cover by Will Cormier of an Edward-Norton-looking Hari Seldon checking into a fabulous pink Trantorian hotel. There is an ad in the middle for a collector's edition of the original Foundation novel with the awesome Michael Whelan cover + a copy of the new and "exclusive" short story Cal (I've read it, it rules, though it's a bit of a clip show). In the back, there is an ad for the upcoming novel Forward the Foundation (the best one but not part of my collection yet), TWO author bios and an adorable author photo. Asimov would die shortly after, in April 1992 :(

Foundation: a 1985 reprint by British publisher Panther Books, with a stunning wraparound cover by Tim White of the Foundation's lonely settlement on Terminus. There is an order form in the back for dozens of classic sci-fi books by multiple authors, with prices marked in pounds. I wonder how this European book crossed the pond to end up at a used book store in California? I'm glad it did, or I never would have heard of Tim White.

Second Foundation: a 1987 12th printing by Del Rey, with the iconic Michael Whelan cover of Arkady Darrel my beloved standing among the ruins of Trantor. This is my favorite cover of them all🥰 There is a long-ish and funny intro by Asimov about this series' complicated publication history, and an ad in the back for the original Foundation trilogy + the first spinoff, Foundation's Edge.

Foundation's Edge: a first-edition 1982 hardback by Doubleday. It is missing the dust jacket, which isn't a huge loss since, according to Google images, it's not that interesting. It does have a funny dedication.

Robots of Dawn: a "Book Club Edition" 1983 hardback by Doubleday. It still has the dust jacket, designed by Kiyoshi Kanai; the cover isn't that special but the jacket does have another great author photo inside. There is also some water damage on the last pages (probably from some Giskard x Daneel fan's tears).

Complete Robot: a "Book Club Edition" 1982 hardback by Doubleday. The wraparound robot-arm dust jacket by Kiyoshi Kanai is simple but cool as hell, and features a great big author photo that fills the whole back cover☺️ There is also a lovely "Last Word" that makes me tear up a bit.

Stars, Like Dust: a 1983 hardback "Book Club Edition" reprint by Doubleday. The dust jacket features nice wraparound art by Joe Bergeron. In the afterword, Asimov apologizes for the outdated science of his fictional lifeless world's atmospheric composition, since the book was first published in 1950. He doesn't apologize here for the stupid US Constitution subplot that his editor forced him to add, though I know from other sources that he really hated that thing.

Gods Themselves: a cracked-binding paperback by Fawcett Crest, with no date given besides the 1972 copyright. The cover art is absolutely fantastic and bananas; I think it depicts the 3 gender roles of the aliens' marriage, and the 2 worlds colliding. The book doesn't credit the artist, but ISFDB online identifies him as Charles Moll. Thanks Charles Moll👏👏👏

[our-chaoticwhispers]

What Are The Chances (Pt 3)

Pairing:  Chris Pine x Reader

Warning: Smut!! I wrote smut! Oh my god.. Please tell me if it’s terrible!! 

Summary: Filming finally wrapped on Star Trek. You are Chris having been dating for a few months now, but haven’t taken it to the next level. While doing interviews, Chris and you can’t seem to stop flirting, let’s be honest, it’s adorable.

A/N: Again, I LOVE SOFIA BOUTELLA. I think she is amazing. In fact I like her some much, I decided to steal her life… ish… for you, the reader. <3

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Word Count: 1377

Filming was finally finished, and in the few months that you had off while the film was in post-production. You and Chris have been basically inseparable. He has taken you are several perfect dates, even some that most people would think are cliche, but you thought they were endearing. Your favorite being a trip to Disneyland. Chris treated you like a queen, he made you feel like the most important person in the world. There was so much love between the two of you, it was almost tangible. Everyone around you could see that the two of you were made for each other.

A few months later, you, Chris and Zach were sitting in front of an interviewer, talking about the new Star Trek movie. Both the boys were very touchy feely. Especially, Chris. He was constantly playing footsies with you, holding your hand, and rubbing your back.

After the interviews were over for the day, and you finished showering, there was a knock at your hotel room door. While in your towel, you look through the peephole to see the face of your handsome boyfriend.

"Hey baby," you said with a smile. "what are you doing over here? ... With a bottle of wine."

"Well, I thought that we could crack this baby open, and maybe watch a movie or something. It's been a long day, and I just want to hold you." He said, walking into the room.

You kissed him and walked back into the room. "What do you want to watch?" You call as you walk back to your suit case to pull out your PJ's. But, before you could start changing, Chris pulled your towel open and admired your naked form. The love in his eyes, as he raked over your body was intoxicating.

"Maybe we could skip the movie?" He said pulling you close to him. He grabbed the back of your thighs and lifted you up to his waist. You let out a small, surprised yelp, but wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him.

You surprised him by grabbing his face and kissing him deeply. Tongues intertwine in a battle for dominance. You finally relent and enjoys the delicious assault on your mouth.

"If you don't want to go any further, just let me know." He said between kisses. Chris respected your decision to take everything slow, and he would never dream of rushing you. He walked back to the bed, and set you down.

You responded by grabbing his face and deepening the kiss. Chris moved his hands over your arms to your legs and back to your face. He gives you a little push that signals for you to lie back on the bed, as he kneels between your legs, scoring your luscious legs with love bites and kisses until he reaches the spot he was looking for.

He feels you tense as he gently removes your panties, “Last chance to tell me to stop.” he croons as he gently starts to rub her clit with the pad of his thumb.

"Please don't stop." You moan, lightly. You had been waiting for this moment, but you were far too scared to initiate it. And Chris was not one to try and pressure you into anything until you were ready.

You were already responding so much to his touch. When he replaces his thumb with his mouth, you think you might burst. You have never felt such exquisite pleasure in your life. The feeling is so much better in real life than anything you could have ever dreamed.

He licks your clit expertly. He knows all the right places to run his soft tongue over. Just a few short minutes after starting, you are shaking and on the verge of orgasm.

You reach down and grab a fist of his hair, forcing him to lick harder and faster. When your orgasm hits, it hits you hard, and causes you to shake violently. He soaks up every second of it. Licking well after the orgasm started, making you call out his name in ecstasy.

He gently removes the rest of your clothes, exposing your breasts, taking one nipple in his mouth at a time and lavishing over them until they harden to peaks.

Chris lifts himself off of you and stares intently at you. “I will give you one more chance to tell me no. But, if you still say yes, I will take you in any way that I want, as many times as I want. Do you understand?”

“I want you, Chris. Do whatever you want with me.” You look intently at him. Your lust for him, barely contained. Chris stares at you with a smile on his face that makes your heart jump

“I just want you to focus on pleasure. Just relax, and let me take care of you." His kiss intense and full of passion. You are so lost in the feeling of his mouth on yours and the taste of yourself on his lips.

He walks around from one side of the bed to the other, staring at every curve of your body. He lingers on the curl between your thighs and decides he needs to taste you one more time. As he laps at you and gently bites at your sensitive clit, you try to that you are about to cum, but the words don't make it out in time.

He looks down at your naked form in front of him. Fuck, you are so wet. He kisses his way you to your lips and captures you in another mind fracturing kiss. "Are you okay, baby?" He asks.

Your only response is to moan and grind yourself against him. You are so aroused at this point that it is almost painful. Chris moans into the crook of your neck before gripping himself and slowing pushing into you.

Part of you wants him to just push in as hard and as fast as he can, but the other part of you is savoring the slow torture. By the time he is fully seated in you, you are grateful that he went slow. My god, the man is huge. He pauses a moment, to let you adjust to the delightful intrusion.

"Are you okay?" He said after he noticed you squirming a bit.

"Yeah, I'm fine... You are just... bigger than I anticipated." You say sheepishly.

Chris can't help but laugh a little at the blush that rises to your cheeks. He begins to move and the feeling is almost indescribable. It may be cliche, but it feels like you two are made for each other. The rhythm Chris sets it perfect, just the right amount of passion and roughness.

You can feel yourself about to fall over the edge, and it seems that Chris can sense it, as he speeds up just a bit. He kisses you roughly and wraps his arms above your head as he drives into you, faster and harder with each pump.

"I'm so close, (Y/N)." He moans into your ear. Your name falling from his lips like a benediction. So soft and yet so full of longing that it is enough to send you over the edge. Clenching your inner muscles around him hard, as you call out his name.

He collapses on top of you, heavy - but not unpleasant. You both lay there for what feels like an eternity, both coming down from your highs. You idly run your fingernails up his back, causing him to shiver and laugh into your shoulder. After planting several kisses on your neck and collar bone, he looks at you in your (Y/E/C) eyes.

"I love you, (Y/N). More than I ever thought I could love another person." He sighs rolling off of you. "I just wanted our first time together to be special. And I feel like I rushed it."

You scoot over to him, straddling his lap and kissing him - hoping that the kiss shows him how much you love him.

"Chris, it was perfect. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect night." You say as you push him back and wedge yourself in so that you are the little spoon. "I love you, too."

[boldlyvoid]

Amethyst you so much

Summary: Spencer has had a crush on Y/N since she started working at the bau. She only ever works the night shift after a case, handling all the aftermath gracefully. one night, Spencer stays back and they strike up a conversation about rocks, causing their feelings to dig a little deeper.

Warnings: pure fluff, weed mention, hurt/comfort, grief and mourning

Word Count: 6.4K

Read on Ao3

Late nights at the office had become his thing since Gideon left.

He couldn’t bring himself to go home some nights without a game of chess, a cup of coffee, and the ambiance of the post case staff working. He would’ve had no idea about what goes on after they close a case if he didn’t stay behind most nights.

The phone rings almost every 10 minutes, and it’s always answered by the sweetest voice. The fax machine never turns off, and the most beautiful girl in the world is always running around placing papers in different places.

He’s been smitten with her since she started here, 2 years ago. Never seeing much of her since she was switched to the night shift, always wanting to just watch her from afar, never speaking to her unless he needed to.

“Yes, again we are so sorry for the door,” he can hear her voice from the back corner of the room. “Agent Morgan will be paying for that out of his paycheck, don’t worry, Mr. Kennings. We’ll be sure to remember your hotel when we’re in the area again. The FBI has a very generous budget for overnight cases. Of course, you have a good night too.”

She hung the phone up harshly and let out a deep sigh. He turned around to see her face in her arms, resting against the desk. She looked done, completely fed up. He would be too.

She looked up then, noticing that he was making eye contact with her. She awkwardly smiled and waved at him, “sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Spencer replied. “We asked for the key, I should have stopped him from kicking it in.”

She laughed then, walking over to his desk so she didn’t have to yell across the room. She sat on the corner of his desk lightly, “why do you stay every night?”

“Oh, um,” he wasn’t prepared for this. She had never talked to him before. She was barely able to even look at him when she used to place papers on his desk 2 years ago, now she was on his desk.

“I don’t like to bring the work home with me, it’s better to destress here before I go to my apartment,” he answered, half honestly.

She nodded slightly, “I get it. Luckily I go home in the mornings so the sun helps me feel better.”

“Going home in the dark isn’t fun,” she lightly smiled up at her.

“Do you want a coffee or anything?” She asked softly, “seeing as I am still your assistant as long as you’re here?”

He laughed lightly, “I would, but I’d like to join you in the staff room for it?”

“Okay,” she stood, straightening out her shirt as he stood as well.

He held the doors open for her, letting her walk out first, still smiling as she waited in the hall for him. Never being anything less than 1 foot from him for some reason, and he didn’t mind in the slightest.

“Do you like your job?” He asked lightly.

“Oh yeah,” she laughed. “It’s like customer service on crack. Have you ever had to explain to someone why you can’t pay for the cracked foundation after Agent Morgan’s ransacked a place?”

“I honestly never thought of who has to deal with the aftermath,” he awkwardly admitted to her. “I’m so sorry.”

She couldn’t stop laughing as they entered the kitchen, “it’s fine. I never have to apologize on your behalf, it’s everyone else who seems to be reckless. Sometimes I feel like it would be better if I came along to babysit.”

“That would be helpful,” he smiled softly as she entered the staff room.

He watched as she took a new coffee filter out of the cupboard. Emptying the coffee pot with ease, rinsing everything before adding the water and scooping in the grounds. He was mesmerized by how fast she was able to do it, then again it was sort of her job.

“What mug would you like?” She turned to him with a smile that made his heart skip a beat.

“Um, the purple one, if it’s there?”

“You really like purple, huh?” She teased him, standing on her tippy-toes to reach the mug for him.

She placed it on the counter before grabbing a white mug, it had a bumblebee on it, “bee happy” written along the top. It was perfect for her.

“Purple is a stress-reducing colour,” she explained. “When I was a kid my parents painted my room purple so that I’d sleep better.”

“I’ve always been drawn to it.”

She leaned against the counter while the coffee pot started to percolate, “Probably because of your anxiety, coffee doesn’t help that.”

“It’s in my DNA to be like this,” he tried to joke, knowing he succeeded when her smile crept back onto her face.

He was on a mission to keep seeing it.

“For someone who spends a lot of time with dead bodies, creepy places and bad people, you sure are a mousy little thing aren’t you?” She teased him.

“I also love Halloween, go figure.” He’s not sure where the confidence came from, being able to make light-hearted jokes like this was only easy with the team.

Which she technically was a part of. He’s seen her almost every single day for 3 years, slowly being able to get comfortable enough for this very moment.

“What else are you into, outside of here?” She asked honestly, making his heart swell as no one else had ever asked him before.

“Lots of things,” he sighed. “I love to read, I’ll read anything. But mostly I enjoy far-off worlds. Lord of the Rings, Star Trek, Doctor Who, Sherlock mostly.”

“No supernatural?” She gasped. “Sacrilege, honestly. What kind of nerd are you if you don't support supperwholock?”

“That's the show with the monster hunting brothers right?” He tried to recall it to his mind.

She nodded with a pressed-lipped smile, “it’s bad but in a way where I can’t stop watching every Thursday, they just introduced an angel who is pretty gay. Star Trek is cool too, I guess, I was raised by Trekkies.”

“My mom was into Doctor Who.”

“Mamma’s boy,” she teased him slightly, returning her focus to the coffee as she poured the now finished brew into their mugs. “She was nice when she came in that one time, I made her a very sweet coffee just like yours.”

He reached for the sugar then, poring a generous amount into his mug with a grin, “how much do you like?”

“the same amount,” she couldn’t help but laugh. “I hate the taste of coffee, but it keeps me awake.”

He poured the sugar into her mug as she places a spoon in each. Allowing him to stir his own before picking it up finally. Holding the warm ceramic in his hands, it was almost as warm as the feeling in his chest when he looked at her.

He’s felt it for a long time. He’s been caught staring at her by Derek, JJ even tried to get him to give her his number. Which she already had for when she calls him into work in the middle of the night. They knew he had a crush, he did too. He just didn’t know what to do about it.

“Come to my desk, I want to show you something?” She asked softly, avoiding eye contact as she walked towards the door.

He followed, like a lost puppy, all the way back to her desk. It was always neat, he always looked at it when he made his way up the stairs to the briefing room. He could even see it from where he sat at the table sometimes. Always wanting to see her leave in the mornings.

She had a collection of rocks that always changed, he loved the blue one the most but it wasn’t there currently. She had all new ones since the last time he looked.

“Here,” she hands him one. It’s brown and gold, the colours moving and shifting as he turns it with his fingers. The gold running through it like a beautiful wave.

“what’s this for?”

“It’s a Tiger’s eye, for good luck and happiness,” she smiled. “Keep it at your desk and maybe it’ll be easier for you to relax when you come back?”

The butterflies in his chest were swirling then as she looked up at him with pleading eyes. Wanting him to take it, wanting him to feel better. Caring for him.

“Thank you,” he barely whispers, clearing his throat softly. “It’s very nice of you.”

“You’re always nice to me, so,” she shrugged.

They sat down then, he dragged his chair from his desk over to hers. Sitting in close as she explained all the meanings to her rocks. He listened carefully, getting to examine each one as she spoke.

“This one is Jade, it’s for balancing emotions and allowing compassion so I don’t scream at everyone on the phone,” she laughed as she placed one in his hands. Her fingers brushing his palm softly.

It was a beautiful green stone with a thin white line running through it, separating into 3 directions as he flipped it over, “it’s beautiful.”

“I know some people don’t believe in this stuff,” she started to get embarrassed as she placed them all back on the shelf. “But I’ve always thought; if the moon, which is just a rock, can control the water, and humans are 70% water, then who’s to tell me the moon cycles don’t control my emotions and these smaller rocks can’t help problem areas?”

“You’re not wrong,” he shook his head softly as he thought her words over. “People depended on the stars and planets for guidance originally, as well as rocks and herbs for healing, just because it’s outdated doesn’t mean it doesn’t work?”

“Thank you,” she smiled. “No one has ever agreed with me that easily.”

“Anytime you want to talk, I’ll just be over there,” he pointed at his desk. “And I’m a phone call away?” He swallowed sharply at his boldness, trying to stay calm as he awaited her answer.

“I do have your number,” she smiled, reaching out to place her hand on his. “But you should go home, I’m sure you’re chilled out now.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, staring at her hand as they touched. He lightly wrapped his hand around hers, holding it slightly, running his thumb over her knuckles. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“And every day after,” she whispered, tilting her head as she smiled at him.

This was going to be interesting.

—

Penelope was always dragging him out. She would take him shopping, to dinner, to the movies. She was like his big sister, dedicated to making sure he wasn’t always cooped up or trying to retreat into a fantasy life.

She kept him busy.

She had 4 bags in her hands as they walked down the street, peering into the store windows to see what else she could possibly be interested in taking home for someone. That’s when they passed the natural health store.

He stopped in his tracks, seeing all the different rocks on the wall accompanies by little cards that described how they could help. He opened the door and rushed inside before Penelope even noticed he stopped following her.

“Good afternoon!” The shop owner called out to him. “How can I assist you today?”

“Um, the girl I like has a rock collection,” he says softly, knowing Penelope is behind him listening. “Crystals more specifically, I’d like to get her some?”

“Well, you came to the right place,” the man beams, escorting him to the wall of rocks. “What is she like?”

“Wonderful,” the words are carried out of his mouth on a sigh as he thinks about her. “She’s confident and nice, and caring. She’s always positive and just so lovely.”

“I’ve got you,” the man starts picking rocks off the wall and placing them in his hands.

Spencer follows him to the desk where he lays down a handful of rocks, Penelope is shockingly quiet as she stands beside him, staring at the collection. She’ll be full of questions later, all of which he is terrified of.

“This is a rose quartz, pretty basic love, beauty, anti-depression stone,” he pushes the pink and a green rock towards him. “Serpentine is for new adventures, observation and insight. I have a feeling you’re up for an adventure with her?”

Spencer nodded enthusiastically, “I like that one. It would be better to get her some rare ones, some that have to do with friendship, new beginnings, or opportunities?” He tried to explain his feelings as best as he could. Not knowing if he sounded dumb for a change.

The man smiled wide, “here,” he dipped below the counter and dug out a box. “Chrysocolla is literally for new beginnings, love and opportunity.”

He hands Spencer a vitreous, raw blue stone with small green marks running all through it, it’s beautiful like her. “This is perfect.”

“I’ll throw in a Kiwi Jasper as well, it’s for being by someone's side, support and trust. As well as a Ruby in Zoisite it symbolizes finding the joy in life with someone,” he hands Spencer two equally beautiful stones, prepping a bag and wrappings for all of them.

Spencer lays out the 5 stones he picked out, watching him wrap them with care before placing them in a bag. He rings everything up, Spencer pays and before he’s even out the door Penelope is pouncing on him for answers.

“Who?!”

He can't help but blush and stutter, trying to brush past her and continue walking down the street. “You can’t hide forever Spencer, who is she?”

“How do you know it’s a she?”

“You literally said so?” She looks at him like he’s an idiot. “Come on? I won't tell anyone!”

“Y/N.”

The gears are turning in Penelope's head as she tries to place a face to the name, knowing she’s seen her somewhere, “From the office?”

He nods softly, “the one Derek bullies me for staring at?” He clues her in more as they walk.

“He also bullies her for staring at you,” she adds with a smile. “She’s going to love those, when are you going to give them to her?”

“I was thinking about just leaving one on her desk every day? Maybe with a note for why I picked it?” He really wants to woo her, she’s too special to just flirt with.

“She’s going to love that.”

—

Sure enough, he walked into work every day for the next week, placing a rock on a sticky note on her desk. He was never around when she was able to see it, only knowing she got it when he'd arrive at work the next morning with a note reading 'thank you ♥︎ ' on top of his files.

He thinks about her all weekend, planning how he'll give her the last rock as he takes the elevator up that morning. Only to see her sitting at her desk, phone pressed to her ear as she tried to talk someone out of suing the FBI, she looked absolutely miserable. Just a casual Monday morning for her, almost at the end of her shift.

He rushed over to his desk, putting all his stuff down to dig one of the rocks from his satchel. Picking the Kiwi Jasper for today, he grabbed a pen and a sticky note and wrote her a little note.

“Always here if you need to talk, -Spencer ♥︎”

He walked over to her desk, she was still talking so she didn’t notice him until he was right there, she looked up at him with a thankful smile.

“Yes sir,” she answered the person talking to her. “Can I call you back after I speak to the chief? thanks.” She hung up on him, turning all her attention to Spencer.

“I know you know it's been me leaving these, but I brought you in another one,” he says softly, placing the rock in her hand and sticking the note to the shelf where it would end up.

“oh my gosh, Spencer?” She placed her free hand on her heart as she looked at the rock.

“You looked upset?”

She stands and pulls him into a hug, he can feel all the eyes on him as he holds her back, letting his chin rest on her shoulder as she squeezes him.

“Thank you,” she whispered as she pulled back, awkwardly smiling at him as she also noticed everyone staring.

“Always,” he smiled back, hand still resting on her arm. “Um, I have a case I need to get to.”

“Of course, good luck,” she smiled.

He pulls the tiger's eye out of his shirt pocket, showing her that he still had it, “kinda hard not to have good luck with this.”

She bit back a smile, her eyes gleaming as she took a deep breath through her nose. Releasing the same feelings he was keeping inside, allowing both their butterflies to swarm out together.

—

He loved when they had cases in Virginia. Being able to stay in the bullpen and work was relaxing, it was easier to think where he felt safe.

He was working on the geo profile all alone, a huge map stretched across a clear case board as he laid a yardstick across it. Drawing a thick red line with marker over it, in his own little world as he worked away.

He doesn’t realize she’s standing there too until she’s lightly pressing her hand on his back.

“Hey,” she whispers softly. “It’s 10 pm, thought you’d like a coffee?” She places the purple mug on his desk with her purse, turning her attention back to what he’s doing.

“Thank you, I’m almost done here,” he says softly, finishing the red triangle he was making on the map.

“I’ve always found it fascinating how you do this,” she complimented him. “You’re so careful.”

“Like baking, it’s an exact science,” he smiled softly.

It made her giggle slightly, placing her hand back on his back as she moved in closer to look. He wanted her to stay there forever, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to focus. He tried his best to steady his hand as he finished the line.

Putting the yardstick back down and turning to her, she doesn’t move her hand, instead, softly moving to rest on his arm as she stands close to him. “How are you?”

He feels nervous for some reason, it’s not like she hasn’t been this close to him before. It’s just that she’s close and she smells wonderful and he wonders if her lips would be a better wake-up call than the coffee she brought.

He realizes he’s staring at her lips when he licks his own, “I’m good,” he furrows his brow and clears his throat with a nod.

She smirks at him, “how come you’re the only one still here? Hotch said it could wait till tomorrow?”

“I was waiting for you,” he admits, “but I got carried away setting this up, I never heard you come in?”

“Cause I didn’t,” she scrunches her nose slightly as she straightens her stance. “I saw you working hard and went right to get you a coffee.”

“You’re wonderful,” he blushes as the words slip out, trying his best to keep eye contact when all he wants to do is kiss her.

She pats his arm slightly as she backs up a little, grabbing her bag from where she set it on his desk. “I’m going to set up for the night, come talk to me before you leave?”

“Of course,” he says as she walks away, letting out a small sigh as he realizes just how badly he wants her.

He never gets to talk to her before he leaves, she’s on the phone when hotch comes storming in. Saying something about another body and making Reid leave with him. He’s busy for 3 days straight, thinking about her with every free thought he’s able to squeeze in.

He carries the rock from her in his pocket everywhere he goes; in his pants beside his keys, in his bag with his books, in his breast pocket, over his heart, behind a bulletproof vest. Feeling it press against his chest, a part of her keeping him safe where ever he went.

They finish the case with minimal damage, Spencer specifically making sure that Derek leaves all the doors on the hinges for Y/N’s sake, cleaning up any messes they make so she won’t have to hear about it over the phone. They all notice that he’s doing it for her, quietly appreciating the fact that Spencer is happy for a change, that there’s a glimmer of hope in his eyes again.

He arrives back at Quantico 30 minutes before her shift starts. Everyone else is packing up for the day while he sits at his desk, reading to occupy the time before she comes in.

Only she doesn’t.

30 minutes pass and she’s nowhere to be seen, it’s only 9:02 by the time he starts to panic. Wondering if she’s okay, hoping she’s just in the elevator or grabbing a coffee that’s actually good, somewhere outside of the office.

“Reid,” he hears Hotch calling him from his office door. “She just called in, her grandmother passed away last night so she won't be in.”

“Oh,” he furrows his brow, looking at him with confusion. “How did you know?”

“Penelope,” he smiles. “She’s still here too, and she knows where Y/N lives.”

“It wouldn’t be weird to go see if she’s okay?”

Hotch just smiles at him again, “go see her, Reid.”

Getting her address from Penelope felt a little weird, but she writes it on a sticky note for him and he’s out the door before she can even pry into what he’s going to say. Which is good, because he doesn’t know yet.

It’s late, but he stops by the little rock store on his way to her house. Seeing the lights still on and the same man from before behind the counter.

“Welcome back,” he’s overly cheerful for it being so late. “How did she like them?”

“She likes the ones I’ve given her so far,” he smiles, looking over the wall himself this time for the right one.

Scanning past every emotion and affirmation known to man as he looked around, picking out a beautiful pink Rhodonite for healing grief, supposedly acting as a hug from emotional troubles. And a Rainbow Moonstone for inner peace, harmony and strength.

“She’s lost someone recently?” He asks as Spencer places them on the counter.

“Her grandmother,” he says softly. “These are good, right?”

“They’ll be perfect, we also have amethyst bracelets, they’re good for healing and drawing in positive energy,” he points towards the small display of bracelets. Small purple stones separated with small gold beads.

He picks up 2 of them, placing them on the counter as well.

“Is she still just a crush?”

Spencer laughs lightly, “unfortunately.”

“She might be more after this,” he smirks, ringing him up. “I’ll give you a 2 for one deal on everything, I have a feeling you’ll be in a lot.”

Spencer thanks him as he pays, picking out a small purple bag for the rocks and bracelet. Placing one on his own wrist before leaving. Also picking up some cookie dough ice cream and a card at the corner store just beside her apartment. Remembering all the times Penelope, JJ or Emily has mentioned it being the best ice cream for crying.

He takes a very deep breath before knocking on her door, hoping to every god out there that she doesn’t find this incredibly inappropriate and weird.

“Spencer?” He hears her voice before she even opens the door, looking out the peephole at him.

She whips the door open, eyes puffy and swollen as she looks at him in shock. She’s in a big sweater and shorts, tears dripping down her cheeks as she shakes her head at him.

“I thought you could use some cheering up?” He awkwardly smiles, holding the ice cream up for her to see.

She wraps her arms around his middle, burying her face against his coat. Still crying as she holds him, he holds her with his free hand, shushing her as he presses his cheek to her head.

She pulls back with a sniffle, “come in,” she offers with an arm out, ushering him inside the small room as she closes the door.

He takes his shoes off, handing her the ice cream so he can take off his coat and satchel too. “This isn’t weird right?”

“Not at all,” she laughs slightly through the awkwardness. “You don’t know how much it means to me that you care this much.”

“I brought something for you,” he says as he struggles to dig everything out of his pocket.

He hands her the card and the little purple bag, seeing the overwhelming glance grow on her face. Her eyes grew wide as he mouth opened, speechless.

She opened the card first, reading the passage about grief that was already provided. Dealing with grief was something Spencer knew too well, adding something a little special to the bottom of the card.

“To live in hearts we left behind is not to die,” -Thomas Campbell. As long as you remember her, with a smile on your face and love in your heart, she will always be with you ♥︎ Spencer

She wipes her tears with her forearm, placing the card on the counter beside the ice cream before she opens the bag. She pulls out the bracelet first, absolute shock on her face.

“Spencer?” Is all she can say, in a high squeak as she shakes her head at him.

“I didn’t want you to be sad,” he says softly, stepping into her space and placing a hand on her arm. “I love seeing you smile, and I thought this could help.

He takes the bracelet from her grasp and places it over her hand. Resting it on her wrist softly, straightening it out against her sweater as she notices the matching on over his shirt sleeve.

“Oh this is so cute,” she swoons. “thank you, really Spencer.”

“And there are some rocks for grief healing in there too, one is supposedly like an emotional hug which should heal the grief and sorrow, and the other is more for inner peace and harmony,” he rambles away, not wanting her to miss anything.

She pours the rocks from the bag, into her hand, looking them over silently with a smile, “they’ll look great on my desk.”

“The purple looks nice on you too,” he compliments her, watching her eyes drift up to him.

She places the rocks on the counter before wrapping her arms around him once more. This time he’s able to actually hold her back, tight as possible as he rubs his hand over her back.

She smells like home, clean laundry and happiness. She’s soft and warm, he holds her perfectly against his chest, like she was a missing puzzle piece that someone finally found under the table, she fits into his life like she was supposed to be there.

She kisses his cheek softly before she pulls back, causing him to pull her into a real kiss on impulse. Connecting their lips as she sighs into the contact, melting into his grasp as she kisses him back.

Her lips are soft, fitting between his own gently as she breathes him in. Her hands reach up to grip his cheeks, kissing him again and again, placing pecks to his lips and cheeks with her eyes closed as he giggles.

“Thank you,” she whispers against his lips, “for everything.”

“I’d do anything for you,” he whispers back, kissing her one last time before she pulls away.

“I was actually about to smoke some weed on the fire escape and probably cry some more,” she laughs lightly. “would you like to join me?”

“I’ll stick with a bowl of ice cream,” he smiled awkwardly.

“Nice one,” she laughs as she opens the ice cream.

“What?”

“Oh, you didn’t even get the reference you made,” she laughs lightly, “to get high you smoke a bowl, so…”

It makes him smile, “I'm a comedian part-time.”

He makes her laugh again, loving the sound of her giggle replacing the tears. “Why aren’t you this funny at work?”

He thinks about it for a little, watching her scoop the ice cream into two bowls, “it’s a little hard to make jokes when people's lives are on the line, I know everyone else does but I get too focused.”

“They probably wouldn’t appreciate your jokes even if you did make them,” she says as she handed him a bowl with a spoon. “They’re kind of mean to you, in a family way but it still sucks sometimes to overhear.”

She walks into the living area then, grabbing a few blankets and opening the window to the fire escape. Crawling out to sit on the ledge, waiting for him.

“I don’t mind it,” he says as he finally sits down beside her.

She places the blanket over their laps, both of them sitting criss-cross applesauce as they ate.

“Do you like your job?” She asks him, just like he once asked her.

“Most of the time,” he nodded as he got brain freeze. The cold air, the cold ice cream, everything that was catching up to him as he scrunched his face up at the feeling.

She laughs at him only a bit before she’s also attacked by the brain freeze, holding the vein in her neck as she chokes out another laugh, trying to warm up the blood going to her head so the pain would stop.

They’re both just a mess of giggles together, unable to say any words as they let it all out. She leans her head on his shoulder lightly as they calm down to just soft chuckles. He presses his cheek against her head.

“Thank you, Spencer,” it sounds like she’s crying a bit. “My grandma was a lovely woman, she’d be glad I’m laughing right now.”

He reached out a hand for her to hold over the blanket. She interlocked their fingers softly, both cold from holding their ice cream bowls.

“If she was anything like you, I’m sure she was the most wonderful woman,” he says softly, not intending to make her cry but having a feeling he might.

“Would you be interested in holding me on the couch while I cry?” She asked softly, tears in her eyes as she looked up at him.

“Whatever you need, I’m here for you.”

—

He’s late for work the next morning.

Waking up to the smell of coffee, opening his eyes to a strange view. He’s on a couch he doesn’t recognize in a room he doesn’t know too well.

Then he remembers, they ended up cuddled up on the couch. He wakes up to the memory of her on his chest, crying softly as they listened to some music, he ran his hand over her back while she went through it all, blessed to have his support.

He fell asleep under her at some point, waking up alone with a blanket laid over him. He sat up to see her in the kitchen, pouring coffee into a travel mug.

“Good, you’re awake,” she smiles at him. “Coffee is ready, I uh, I have this button-up shirt from a guy friend, if you wanted to wear that to work today? So they don’t think you stayed here?”

“That’s smart,” he replies as he rubs the sleep out of his eyes.

Getting up, he uses the bathroom, changes and takes that coffee from her. He’s not expecting her to kiss him on the lips at the door, but she sends him off to work like an old housewife.

He doesn’t want to pull away from her, keeping her pressed against him as he leans in for 4 more kisses before she finally pushes him out into the hallway with a laugh, “get to work!”

“Fine,” he sighs, “are you going to be in tonight?”

“Yeah,” she smiles, “funeral is in West Virginia next week, so I’ll be in until then.”

“I’ll see you later?”

She nods slightly with a soft smile, “you’ll be seeing a lot of me soon, Spencer.”

“Good,” he winks at her before heading down the hallway and towards the street entrance.

He sighs as he walks outside, resting his back against the apartment complex door, taking a moment to think about everything that just happened, the night of company and the wonderful send-off.

It was something he could get used to.

He rushes into the briefing room when he arrives at Quantico, sitting down with his coffee and pretending he wasn’t late. Listening carefully to JJ’s presentation of the case as he flips through everything he missed already.

“Wheels up in 30,” he heard Hotch say as he zoned back in. “Nice of you to join us, Reid.”

“I know that travel mug from somewhere,” Derek said as he stared at Spencer, who was taking a sip to avoid the awkwardness.

“Hmm?” He played dumb.

“That’s Y/N’s. She washes it every morning when she leaves to go home, I see her do it every morning,” his eyes open wide. “Holy shit.”

“Isn’t that the same tie and slacks from yesterday?” Emily teased him as well.

“Her grandma died, I brought her ice cream and slept on the couch okay?” He all but yelled, flailing his arms slightly so they’d all back off.

Derek reached his fist out for him to pound it, “good man.”

Then Penelope noticed the bracelet, “did she get you that?”

He sunk his hand into his pocket then, “no.”

“What?” Emily and JJ asked in unison, straining their necks to try and get a good look at what she was talking about.

He nervously held his arm out for them, showing them the purple bracelet resting over the sleeve of his shirt. “I got one for her too, it’s for healing and peace. It’s what she needs right now.”

“Oh, so you love her,” Derek smiles as he teases him. Making everyone else in the room swoon slightly.

“Okay and?”

“Oh my god!” Most of them shout at him, embarrassing him to no end. He was so glad she wasn’t at work this morning or else she would be able to hear this from her desk.

“Did you kiss her?” Rossi pries, asking what everyone else was thinking.

He scrunches his face, pushing his glasses up slightly as he clears his throat, “a few times.”

“Is she your girlfriend?” JJ kept the questions coming.

“Not yet,” he said softly. “Kinda weird to walk into her apartment while she cries to say ‘hey sorry about the death in your family, want to date me?’”

“Yeah,” Emily agrees, shrugging lightly. “At least she knows you like her now, it’s been what? 2 years?”

“2 years, 3 months, 17 days and 43 minutes,” he confirms with a small nod and pressed lips.

“Gross,” Derek teases him.

“The plane is leaving in 10 minutes,” Hotch cut into their fun.

Making them all gather their things and continue the interrogation in the elevator, and eventually on the plane, and in the police precinct. Even Penelope called him in the middle of everything to bug him about her.

The questions were never-ending, everyone wanted to know how they even started talking, who made the first move, how he plans to ask her out. They were relentless, he almost regretted admitting to anything.

They bug him all throughout the day, all the way until they’re arriving back at the BAU late that same night. He almost doesn’t want to go back to the bullpen and see her with all of them, knowing they were going to follow and say something.

She’s waiting in the hall when the elevator doors open, a pressed-lipped smile on her face, “bad news.”

“Another one?” Hotch sighs, “have Garcia send us the info. Be at the table in 10.” He pushes his way out of the elevator, passed them all as they stare at Y/N.

“Hi?” She awkwardly waves at them all, showing off the bracelet on her wrist.

“See ya, Spence,” JJ and Emily say as they matt his shoulder, dragging Derek and Rossi towards the bullpen doors.

“Sorry,” he apologizes for them softly, stepping into her space.

She wraps him up in a quick hug, keeping one arm around his waist as she guides him towards the bullpen, “it’s fine, they’re going to have to get used to us being together.”

“Together?” He repeats her words.

“I only cry on my boyfriend's shoulders, if you're up for the title?” She teases him softly, pinching his side as they walk towards the doors.

“Can I frame “Dr. Spencer Reid, Y/N’s boyfriend” beside my Ph.D.’s?” He keeps his hand on her shoulder, holding each other slightly as they walk towards her desk. He felt like one of those kids who wouldn’t let go of their girlfriend's hand in the school hallway, attached to her at the hip.

“I’ll make one for you while you’re gone,” she laughs lightly.

They stop at her desk where he sees all rocks he got her collecting on the shelf, as well as a cup of coffee and his favourite kind of donut.

“Thought you deserved something nice too,” she says as she nudges his side.

He kisses her on the cheek as a thank you, “you’re welcome,” she smiles to herself. A feeling of pride growing in both their chests.

“See you later?” He asks as he picks up the coffee and donut, walking away slowly as she smiles at him.

“Come home to me safely, Doctor Reid,” her voice is just loud enough for everyone in the briefing room, where everyone is waiting at the window, watching them, deciding to put on a show in return.

He stops on the steps to look at her softly, “I’d fight a thousand unsubs to come home to you.”

“I’ll leave the light on,” she blows a kiss at him, making him blush a deep red.

He waves, making his way up the steps and into the briefing room. A smile on his face, heart thumping in his chest, all the support in the world swarming around him as everyone patted him on the back.

That tiger’s eye really did bring him good luck and happiness, and her name was Y/N.