#and i don’t judge ppl that get scared from that sort of thing | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

juhaksworld · 3 years ago

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TBZ reactions to their s/o being shy and having an rbf in public but really talkative around ppl they know

requested by: @dalivanmagritte

i’m reallly sorry this took me so long to post! T__T I thought I’d be able to finish it in one day,,, but that unfortunately was not true. I hope you enjoy! <3

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Sangyeon:

would be so used to you being super talkative and fun that whenever you were both in public he was surprised by how scary you could look when not smiling. like he’d look over and see you zoning out bc you felt really uncomfortable around strangers and he’d be like “shoot i need to go talk to her before someone thinks she’s plotting murder” so he’d rush over and be like “whatta thinking about that makes you look so grim?” and you’d be like “oh i was just wondering if I should wash my clothes when I get home or wait until tomorrow” and he’d like blink--- and then shake his head wondering how you can be so different around strangers than you were when you were around ppl you were comfortable with. he likes to stay near you most as much as possible in public bc he knows it makes you more comfortable.

Jacob:

the first time you met he was like “oh she’s scary!!” and then his friend introduced you to each other and you became friends and then he completely forgot about ever thinking you were scary bc you were so talkative and silly around your friends. but then after you started dating you went out together and he left for a moment and you started to feel really uncomfortable around all the ppl there and so you stopped smiling and looking around with interested and just sat there with a serious face avoiding all eye contact and when he came back he had a flashback of first meeting you and was like “ummm hey” and you looked up and smiled and looked like your usual self that he was use to and he was like “you look mad scary when you’re not smiling” and you laugh and you’re like “I know. It keeps the weirdos away” you don’t spend that much time around ppl you don’t know after you started dating him though, so it’s all good

Younghoon:

I mean, he sort of has an rbf too so you’ll would connect over that, like the first time you met you were at the library studying and you both looked so scary everyone avoided y’all so you started sitting at the same table so others could sit together away from y’all and then one day something funny happened and you both laughed and you both looked so pretty smiling that everyone in the library was like *mouth drops open* anyways, you and younghoon kinda start liking each other bc you’re always together at the library so you start dating and you’re so happy together you forget how scary you both look until you go out into public alone and look like murder is on your mind. You have a picture of each other smiling as your lock screens so you remember to smile and not scare ppl in public.

Hyunjae:

he’d tease you a lot lol. he knew you for a long time so he kinda got used to your rbf when you were around unfamiliar ppl so he teases you so you smile and look cute again. and he knows you could talk for hours once you're around ppl you like, and he loves that more than anything. he actually realized he was in love with you while watching you zone out across the room. like he always thought “where would this girl be without me” and then suddenly he was like “wait--- i need her more than she needs me” but he just loves seeing you looking all scary in public and ppl lowkey being afraid of you and so you approaches you all coolly and is like “YAH!!” right in front of your face and everyone is like “this dude is gonna get socked in the nose for that” and then you just smile and he’s like “yes. mission accomplished” and everyone’s like “hold on she looks really friendly when she’s smiling!” but they never get a chance to talk with you once hyunjae is around bc he keeps you all to himself knowing you feel more comfortable and happy that way and he loves listening to you talk.

Juyeon:

legit thought you hated him at first and was like “shoot i made this girl hate me and idek what i did” and then one of your friends walks up and you start smiling and he’s like “oh. that girl is beautiful! and she looks really friendly once she smiles” so he tries to get to know you and you instantly like him so you begin talking freely with him and he’s like so whipped for you whenever you smile which is often when you’re talking. so he just listens and listens while you go on and on. and he just loves that he won your trust. he wonders how he could ever think you were scary until you’re left in the corner of the room by yourself and you feel afraid around a lot of strangers so you stop smiling and talking and avoid ppl and he’s like “sjkfjskdksjdkjksjdk I need to go talk be with her rn so she’s happy again” and basically that’s how you start dating. while you guys are dating it’s pretty much the same thing-- he loves listening to you talk and he loves more than anything that you’re comfortable around him.

Kevin:

you were at the library and you zoned out and you were staring all scarily in the same direction kevin was sitting in and he *that meme of the kid holding the cup and who keeps looking sideways at the camera* like he really thinks you’re gonna approach him about something he never did. so he goes over to you and he’s like “are you ok?” and you jerk out of your daydream to see this really cute guy looking at you worriedly and slightly scared and you’re like “ohhh ummm yeahhh why do you aks tho???” and you smile a little bc gosh he’s cute and he’s like “gosh she’s cute” and he’s like “oh nothin” and uses a cheesy pickup line to get your number and you start dating/ become bffs and he lowkey loves that you look so scary when you’re around other ppl but then open up like a flower in the sunshine with him and you and him laugh and talk like there’s no tomorrow whenever you’re together bc you’re both pretty talkative. y’all are inseparable! but like he picks up the habit of looking scary and avoiding eye contact with ppl bc of you and his friends are like “?????” but he doesn't even realize how much he’s been influenced by you.

Chanhee:

he meets you through mutual friends and they warn him like “yeahhh she looks really scary around ppl she doesn’t know but be warned, she’s SUPER talkative once you get to know her” and chanhee’s like “scary around ppl you don’t know? a girl after my own heart” and so you immediately click like---yeahh bffs! you both look scary in public tbh, but when you’re alone you just talk and talk and he just listens with heart eyes bc he loves listening. and you always look so happy when you’re with him or your friends and he’s just like “ahhhhhhh she’s so cute!!!” even when you look like you want to murder someone out in public. you’ll both just glare at ppl together when out in public sometimes even though you’re happy together, just to annoy your friends lol. chanhee never judges you or forces you to talk with ppl when you’re feeling uncomfortable. he 100% understands and instead of saying things like “you should just tryyyy to talk to someone new!!!” he’d be like “what? you’re feeling uncomfortable? mmkay, let’s go...rn!” and y’all would leave-- doesn’t even matter where you were at.

Changmin:

would be like “??????” the first time you felt comfortable enough around him to open up. he thought your gloomy face and quiet personality was who you always were and he was starting to fall in love with that part of you when you burst open like the sunshine and just talked and laughed freely. and then you’re like “oh,,, i’m sorry. did i startle you?” and he’d be like *shocked pikachu face* “oh my goodness no! your laugh is ADORABLE!!!!” and then he’d constantly do things to make you smile and laugh and bring up topics he knew you could talk about for days bc he’s just so in love with you. every part of your personality is endearing to him. he’d tease you after you’d been dating for a while and he knew the limit to which he could tease you without going too far. he’d pretend not to know you and look all scared if he ”happened” to end up standing next to you and like jokingly make a “help me” face to his friends and then someone would notice and start to walk up to him to rescue him from the scary quiet girl and then he’d start laughing and hold your hand while you rolled your eyes.

Haknyeon:

confused. how could you be so different around strangers than when you were with him? even with your friends your social battery would run out soon. but when you were with him?? you had no limit to your energy and excitement and you showed your happiness so easily to him whereas with others you looked scared and skeptical even if you were happy. he worried about you a lot at the beginning of your relationship,,, like you’d be standing there zoning out, not talking to anyone, and he’d be like “gosh, is she ok???? did someone say something upsetting to her????? did she receive bad news????” and he’d rush over to you as soon as he could whenever he saw you starting to look abandoned and sad out in public. after dating for a while you learned to just constantly hang on to his arm bc he protected you from strangers trying to converse with you. when you two were alone you both talked a lot but you laughed even more, like you would have deep meaningful conversations and then just switch to telling the lamest jokes and rolling on the floor dying with laughter and then he’d just look at you while you were smiling and wiping away tears from laughing and he’d smile thinking he was the luckiest guy in the world to have you--- all to himself!

Sunwoo:

wouldn’t even be surprised the first time you hung out together and you really opened up. like he could tell there was a lot more to you than your quietness and rbf. when you first started dating some ppl that knew you both would be like “she looks scary af. what if she’s really boring and like,,, mean??” and he’d *cue the tongue in the cheek thing* “shut up”. once you two were dating for a while he would get so used to your talkative bright personality that when ppl are like “ohhh! you’re dating y/n! the really quiet girl?” he’d be like “who tf are you talking about! I’m dating y/n” and they’d be like *confusion*. he knows your quiet personality in public is a part of who you are and he respects that, but like he doesn’t really even remember that part of you, bc most of your time together is spent alone and he knows that’s when you’re most comfortable and your true self. absolutely HATES when ppl misunderstand you and then hold that against you. you don’t really care but he gets really protective over you.

Eric:

would think it was SO cute! he would coo and tease you gently when you were in public together making you crack a smile. when you started dating and he saw that you matched his energy he would be ecstatic! like he could not wait until you were home and in your comfort zone so you could be crazy together and laugh and talk for hours. sometimes in public old ladies would be like “deary,, you must remember to smile sometimes for your pretty bf here” and Eric would be like “????” “she does, but only when we’re alone” and then he would like flirtatiously smile at you causing you to blush and causing the old lady to feel kinda uncomfortable (as she should) literally does not phase him at all that you’re so different around strangers. like he doesn’t understand it, but he doesn’t think it’s weird either. if you’re standing there like “ughhh i hate ppl” written all over your face you’ll just smile to himself bc yeahh he just thinks it’s cute that you’re that way (idek) and then when someone tries to talk with you and he’s around he’ll swoop over and be like “hi. I’m her bf and spokesperson, how can I help”

#the boyz reactions #the boyz fanfic #the boyz #the boyz fluff #the boyz imagines #sangyeon #jacob #younghoon #hyunjae #juyeon #kevin smith #chanhee #changmin #haknyeon #sunwoo #eric #haknyeon's smile gives life

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heyyylittlemo · 4 years ago

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Small details in 19 Days that keep me up at night

((That I feel rarely gets talked about))

-Mo Guan Shan & The Zodiac Magazine

This chapter was pretty early on in 19days—So that must mean Mo Guan Shan has done this a lot more since, right??😳 and he didn’t even rlly know HT that well at this point so...he must be in heat on the low for HT by now 🥵🥵

So it canonically confirms at least a base physical attraction from the start—and c’mon if this isn’t the most relatable thing ever. Soon as I get an attraction to someone I’m a bit piqued to find out their zodiac. Mo Guan Shan’s hidden curiosity for HT is lwk so cute.

It def suggests that MGS has an under the surface lvl (where he can’t even detect it) pull to understand and get closer to HT.

Mo Guan Shan dreaming of He Tian

I know it was passed off like a “joke” and a “nightmare” but cmon this gay as hawlll

Who DOESN’T dream of their crush?? Dreams usually are about things we heavily think about and/or what we thought about before bed—and I can’t help but to think OX was onto smth

Not to mention, this has high bottom-denial energy. Literally. Like he was soooo trying to avoid getting a shot at the docs bc it was in his ass, why??? Like sir...ur fragile masculinity that was created from ur inner homophobia towards ur own bottom reality was def crashing at that second

N Why he got pain in his tushy??? In this dream?? N ppl bullying him like that abt it lmaoo who irl be saying those things?? Things like “aren’t in the guy who got a shot in ur ass” and “haha I’d like to see you with ur ass in the air~” even tho the translation and the way it was written can be said to mean that these bullies are literally finding it funny that his ass was in the air I have a feeling it was censored and rephrased to hint at its actual implications,, I feel like these guys were actually trying to jokingly solicit Mo in gay acts thru him bottoming—in reaction to the needle butt-scenario. I feel like OX wants us to read between the lines.

And if you see it that way, it really makes it seem like Mo is having a sexuality crisis here. And I think it’s what OX was building up to around that time bcuz it was around after the kiss happened.

It rlly makes me believe MGS genuinely thinks getting a shot in his ass will somehow societally and with unspoken words “expose” him and miraculously express to others that he likes it up the ass—bcuz u cannot tell me that dream and what those bullies were saying weren’t his damn paranoia demons talking

I think a dream interpreter could stretch it enough to say that the bullies are a metaphor of his own insecurities towards his homosexuality and particularly towards his upcoming bottoming feelings. Like he’s legit scared of a hospital needle in his butt—this is not straight behavior. And then we have He Tian to the rescue—(and do you see his look and his flirtatious line) and omg he’s gripping the shit out of his ass in the dream. He’s both being bullied for his bottom-ness and guilty-pleasure getting one rubbed out by He Tian. Like ok, have ur cake and eat it then bitch.

Mo Guan Shan Staring at He Tian

This was a moment leading up to the kiss. MGS was staring (probably admiring while also judging and heating up over HT) He Tian while he was playing BSKTBall—and As a BL writer myself can’t help but to think HT noticed MGS very not-straightly stare at him with a sort of sexual attraction he had towards him on the field.

Like cmon?? I doubt OX writes lines like these for no reason.

I feel like...at least irl...The eyes usually give it away if someone is interested in you or not. you can always see if someone is checking you out and noticing you in a different light like it just has different vibe and feel to it. OX was def trying to show and not tell with this panel that MGS has noticed HT and stares at him in the way we all hope he does. We don’t really get to see and (and I guess it keeps us on our toes and keeps us wondering if the little redhead could actually be falling for HT)—so it’s very subtle, but it is there, and once you notice it you’re like d a m n this makes the kiss scene so much more hopeful (at least for me).

I think this was the push that gave HT hopes to kiss MGS in the first place and it gets overlooked. How do you think HT own curiosity peeked? I think as a community we often think abt Mo and how he developed feelings or will develop feelings for HT but rarely do we ever questions The Who what when where and how He Tian came to like Mo himself. I have my own feelings about them that I can’t explain in this post, least it gets off-topic, but I think it’s very important.

I think his comment “Do I really disgust you that much” makes more sense in this context, of MGS giving HT some reassurance through non-verbal ques. HT was already under the impression that MGS was egging him on with his staring so it can warrant some of He Tian’s confusion. HT probably is pursuing MGS bc he probably senses some lvl of homosexual tension from Mo, and it’s exciting to him. Not only that, but MGS is exciting in his character. So I think HT was also relatively new to this venture and kinda spontaneously kissed Mo out of his own curioustes to explore their attractions and to get a grasp of what Mo was feeling.

It also makes me think HT and MGS experienced some undeniable pleasure or unspoken moment that could not be denied within the kiss as attraction and when MGS then decided to go agaisnt that with violence it only further hit HT, who knew MGS was lying to himself. I mean, it’s a classic BL moment. The two kiss, obviously feel smth (probably couldn’t show much of that due to censorship so had to pass it along as a 100% unsatisfactory exchange) and then one, feeling too much all at once and isn’t comfortable with their confirmed suspensions abt their sexuality—denies everything to the other causing further tensions especially sense both know how eachother really feel despite the others denial. And then the rejected one downplays the kiss’ seriousness to soothe their ego knowing full well the kiss meant smth. So they both internalize what the other said and both feel rejected, but both actually liked it. It’s a classic.

I truly feel that if it wasn’t due to censorship, that the kissing scene would’ve looked a lot more consensual than so forceful and wrong. Like it would’ve been taken as an tension filled “experimentation” that we see a lot in BLs and it only further ties into why MGS would be so bashful whenever the kiss is mentioned, and why HT can use it As a leverage over Mo (“don’t make me kiss you again”) bcuz it brings them back to thy moment where HT experienced some “answer” between Mo and that answer was fulfilling even tho it cannot be fulfilled and probably HT is hoping that maybe one day if he teases him enough about it they can share another kiss one that is a lot less rushed and now that they are closer, will lead to a better result.

Anyways those are my speculations. And I actually have written a short story based on these assumptions(focused on the kiss—and it’s also leading up to a jealously fic) but ofc I haven’t written it in ahwile haha. Just thought it was worth sharing since I noticed 19 days has been updating pretty “eh” lately.

#19 days #tianshan #mo guan shan #tianshancontent #he tian

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ichigokeks · 3 years ago

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Hi, this is just me venting ! Please ignore it if you want !

Well I’ve seen several ppl blame mostly Mo for the current situation and it really annoys me. I’m not saying Mo is not guilty, but some ppl here seem to forget He Tian (I really do love him I swear) has acted like a fucking asshole several times now..actually he is part of the reason Mo lost his job, and overall lacks sensitivity. I’m not saying Mo shutting everyone out is okay..they are both ridiculous, but ppl only complaining over Mo being too prideful and stubborn, while saying He Tian is the only one reaching out is kind of a “wtf” moment. He Tian shoved a credit card into his face that’s pretty humiliating 😂 If it were me, I would have probably spat in his face. Anyway, You can’t criticize Mo and ignore He Tian handling situations so poorly (and it’s been accumulating for a while).

Again, Mo ain’t no saint, but they both are responsible for this mess. this fight is actually good, they both need to sort things out.

Thank you and have a great week ! ✨💖

Hi dear, it's okay to vent 😊

This will be a long answer with my interpretation and take on things

(if anyone wishes to comment please be sure to be respectful especially if you disagree with anyone's opinion)

I hardly check the tag bec of discourse like this. But I fully understand your feelings. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and since we're reading someone else's story, we should be aware that everything we analyse and the conclusions we draw from that is an interpretation. I would never claim to know what Mo or He Tian really think or what Old Xian has planned for them.

We always get BOTH perspectives and stories but people seem to forget that He Tian and Mo respectively do NOT know the perspective of the other. He Tian doesn't know that Mo feels bad for lashing out at him. Mo doesn't know that He Tian is suffering, too, and deeply cares for him and is just really bad at communicating that.

That being said, Mo and He Tian are teenagers that carry burdens teenager should not have to carry. They are both heavily traumatised and it is reflected in their behaviour and interactions.

Yes, it is not okay to use trauma and mental issues as an excuse for everything but... they are teenagers. They are 15 years old! They are not in therapy, they are extremely lonely. They both do not have an adult in their life to whom they can turn to for guidance. (It seems that Mo doesn't want to bother his mother with anything because he feels like he would only cause her heartache and trouble...). So of course they are stubborn, mean, egoistical and proud. It is also part of their character - that might not have anything to do with their past trauma. Some people are stubborn. Some are very proud. That's how it is. I don't think anyone could judge them for that. Mo being poor does not in any way mean he cannot have pride.

He Tian suffers from fear of abandonment. So he latches onto Mo and often forces himself onto Mo with little understanding for Mo's need for privacy or alone-time. He doesn't understand that just because someone wants to be left alone it doesn't mean they will leave you or don't want anything to do with you ever again. He is scared Mo will leave him. He knows that Mo is in dire need of money and at the beginning of their "relationship" Mo only stuck around because He Tian paid him. It is a logical but obviously entirely unfitting and insensitive reaction to offer Mo money whenever Mo pushes He Tian away.

Mo has trust issues and low self-esteem. He is poor and has bad grades at school. He feels like a failure. I thought he knew by now that He Tian is in love with him but taking the latest chapter into account I think he doesn't understand that at all - because He Tian is really bad at expressing affection and general feelings. For Mo it seems like He Tian only pities him and treats him like some sort of charity project to make himself feel good.

So in short, I feel like they are both judged for being human. Are they acting ridiculous and stupid? Yes! But aren't we all like that when we're hurting and feel like no one understands us?

And, yes, I do sometimes feel like it goes too far and I cannot fully follow and understand why they react the way they do - but it is a fictional story after all...

#19 days #old xian #19 days update #tianshan #19 days analysis #mo guan shan #he tian #answered #anon

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shinsouskitten · 4 years ago

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Hey Kat🤗 I was wondering if you could write about Bakugou, Shinsou, or Hawks meeting the reader’s family and something goes wrong and they don’t like them at first. Or possibly the parents think they are a negative influence on the reader.

Hey hey hey

I asked my mom how she’d react if I was dating someone she didn't like and she rlly just said “you wouldn’t be dating them if i didn’t like them”

like damn sis okay chile

Warnings: does it count as angst if the parents are the ones being mean? if so, there’s angst, but also fluff, bakugou is bakugou

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💥 Katsuki Bakugou:

It wasn’t the best first meeting. You had planned to introduce your long term boyfriend to your family at your own pace, but of course the villains of the city had other plans.

You were on a date, en route to the cinema to catch a new movie amidst Bakugou’s insistence that it was a ‘stupid unrealistic movie’. Mere metres from the entrance a villain came rushing past, a handful of gold jewelry in his arms. He pushed you to the side in order to keep running, which of course enraged Bakugou, who immediately took off after the villain, completely oblivious to the sirens following his path.

Unsurprisingly he caught him within moments, but what you hadn’t realized was that all the events had been caught by your dad, standing on the other side of the street. Your dad knew you had a partner, and he knew that they were a hero, given you cancelled every opportunity to meet with the excuse of ‘another villain attack’. What he hadn't expected, however, was for your partner to be possibly his least favorite hero currently climbing the ranks.

Later that night, after your forfeit on the movie date in favour of a much more simple date with your bed, you had a series of texts from your parents.

So, Ground Zero is the partner we’ve heard so little about?

He’s a bit aggressive, isn’t he?

You should’ve told us sooner.

We just don’t want you getting hurt.

That had been the moment you were waiting for. Anyone who didn’t know Bakugou (and a few who did) would describe him as a never ending pool of anger, too aggressive to be a hero and too mean to be a good partner. But if they knew him the same way you did, they would know that’s not always the case.

Of course he’s angry when he has to deal with stupid villains interrupting every date he plans, or news reporters crowding him like an animal in a zoo whenever they got the chance. But he was different with you, more relaxed. He didn’t exactly express his emotions in the best ways, but he loved you, and he’d never hurt you.

Your parents practically demanded a meeting the next day, and blatantly refused to accept any excuses of villain attacks or the like. The meeting was awkward, with your father almost attempting to provoke Bakugou simply to prove a point, but your boyfriend knew this. He put on a good face, masking his worry and anger with an uncharacteristically kind attitude and baffling you all.

Maybe he’d changed his ways. Or at least, that was the conclusion your parents came to by the end of the night, wishing you well as you made your way home. You fought the urge to laugh at Bakugou’s sudden change once your parents left his view, and held back a smile throughout his mutterings of ‘stupid extras’.

He kept up appearances for long enough, but by the time your parents noticed it was a farce, they realized there was nothing they could do to stop the love you held for each other. After all, he may be an ass, but he’d never hurt you.

---

💜 Hitoshi Shinsou:

Shinsou, on the other hand, wanted to meet your family pretty quickly. If anything, just to get it out of the way, but there was a part of him that wanted the validation that he was good enough for you. Sometimes he just didn’t feel like he was, so if your parents liked him, it’d definitely be a weight off his shoulders.

The two of you picked out a nice restaurant, keeping in mind your parents favorite foods in an attempt to butter them up, then send them a text asking you to meet you and Shinsou for dinner. They replied eagerly, especially when you mentioned the two of you were covering the bill.

You arrived first, giving your name at the door and sitting down on the plush leather anxiously awaiting the arrival of your parents. When you finally saw them, the two of you stood up to greet them, you offering hugs while Shinsou held out his hand with a smile.

“It’s nice to meet you.” He said.

Your parents nodded, a false replica of a smile on their faces as they ignored Shinsou’s hand.

The air around you was thick, no one willing to be the first to break the uncomfortable silence, until you eventually suggested you all sit down. You made a mental note to tip your waiter extra when the night was over. It was clear they could sense the awkwardness, and thank the lord they came over at the exact moments you feared a bomb might explode.

The meals went down perfectly, but the atmosphere made it difficult to enjoy anything. Your parents spoke little, and when they did, it was always to you, almost as if Shinsou wasn’t even present.

To be truly honest, he’d expected this reaction, although he hoped he was just overthinking. He knew people didn’t react to his quirk well, and there were many misconceptions about how much he used it. He had hoped your parents hadn’t been so quick to judge.

By the time your waiter delivered your check, you were ready to curl up in your bed and not emerge for a good few weeks. The four of you walked to the door silently, but before you could wish them goodnight, Shinsou spoke up, his hand holding yours tightly as he faced your parents.

“I just want you to know, whether you like me or not, I love Y/n more than anything, and I would never do anything to hurt them. I will protect them until my last breath, and I hope that we can sort out any differences with time.”

Did he really just confess his love to you in front of your parents? Yup. Well, at least it seemed to get a response this time, as your dad replied:

“I should hope you do.” Your dad held out his hand, and Shinsou took it a bit more than happily. “Or I’ll kill you myself.”

Shinsou laughed awkwardly, not sure whether to be scared at your dad's threat or not, especially when he ended it without another word, turning and walking towards their car.

I mean at least he spoke to him, right? That’s an improvement?

Either way, Shinsou quickly realized in reality the only opinion that mattered to him, was yours.

oof having a good dad who cares about you? couldnt be me. also i absolutely hate this one and idk why, but shinsou’s my bby and i feel i disappointed him

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🍗 Keigo Takami (Hawks):

The meeting was almost completely by chance. Keigo often took you on sky-high (not mile-high get your minds outta the gutters ppl) trips on his off days, and while flying one day, you saw your parents' house from the clouds. They hadn’t met Keigo yet, so you suggested that you pop in for a moment. He agreed, and in seconds, you were standing on their porch, hand raised high to ring the doorbell.

Your mother opened the door, surprised to see you, and even more surprised to see the bird standing behind you. Nevertheless she invited you both in, and as your father called Keigo over, your mother pulled you to one side, whispering quiet enough that the two men wouldn’t hear her.

“The news says he’s a bit of a playboy.” You said.

“The news says a lot of things.” You rolled your eyes.

“And his fans?” She asked.

“What about them?” You replied.

“Well,” she paused, “he can get a little friendly with them, don’t you think.”

You sighed. Your mother wasn’t the first person to bring up Keigo’s fans when discussing your relationship, but you knew that in reality, he couldn’t be bothered with the swarms of people throwing themselves at his feet when he had you waiting for him at home.

“He’s a friendly person.” You shrugged.

“You don’t really believe that, do you?”

“Just say what you want to, mom.” You rounded on her, the heightened volume of your voice drawing Keigo’s attention from the other side of the room. “Say it. Go on.”

She glanced around, seeing both Keigo and your father now watching the two of you.

“Fine.” You continued. “I know he has hundreds of fans who would kill to be in his bed at night. But you know what? He’s not there. He’s with me, watching crappy tv and binge eating kfc (CANNIBALISM). If you don’t like him, that’s your problem. But don’t try and convince me to do anything but love him, cause you’re not going to do it.”

Baffled, your mother stammered for a response, but you weren’t about to wait for one.

“C’mon Keigo,” you called, “we’re leaving.”

He was next to you in moments, and you grabbed his hand to pull him out of the house, stopping only when you were satisfied you were out of sight of your parents.

“So, kid…” He looked across at you with a smirk, wrapping an arm around your waist as he lay his chin on your shoulder. “You love me?”

“Shut up bird brain.”

again i hate this but where my baby birds at?

#my hero academia #boku no hero academia #boku no hero #katsuki bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugou #bnha bakugou #hitoshi shinsou x reader #hitoshi shinsou #bnha shinsou #hawks x reader #hawks #bnha hawks #keigo takami x reader #keigo takami #bnha keigo #mha x reader

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testingcheats0n · 3 years ago

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Chapter 2

Imagine being scared of the primary mode of transportation in your world lol 👀

Anyway. There were a lot of descriptions in this chappie that I enjoyed, actually. There are many ways to introduce the food, the climate and the geography of your world and describing a journey through the lands is quite effective. I also liked the detail with the dyed tunic (which got torn rip) many people think that medieval peasants were all dressed in brown and grey which isn't true since dyes were found naturally unless they lived in cities and were extremely poor. They were even more colorful than nobility who tended to combine their clothes.

"Do you announce what you're going to steal before you do it?" Yes, yes he does. He has a precedent of doing just that- you were aware of it... for an important mission the magis didn't give him a debrief or anything huh? I wonder if it's a good idea (it's not)

Gen is stupid after all, I was just giving him the benefit of the doubt.

He's traveling with the magis (weird but ok) and 3 other dudes. One is a warrior of some sort (Paul? Pol?), and the other two look young and not good at fighting (something weird with "A" and Sophos)- "well-bred" and dressed in blue. Our main character judges the youths for not being big and strong, despite he himself being described as short and lanky, without an apparent talent (and even his thieving isn't that great) so I do believe he's throwing stones at glass houses while he has one right behind.

Then he procedes to complain while Useless the older and the younger don't utter a word 🤨

Anyway. He jumps from his saddle without stopping the horse and predictably stumbles and falls on his face. Turns out the megis (?) hasn't fed or taken care of him, despite the long voyage to come presumably weeks in advance

They arrive at an inn. I suppose the inkeeper only serves to noblemen and that's why she was so picky of the smell? Though I wonder how good do the "well-bred" smell after a few days of travel on the road with no baths. I imagine like roses. They must also travel a lot if she can afford to turn away five paying customers out of fear for the sheets she probably doesn't wash herself.

~at the inn~

Wtf are these ppl doing undressing Gen lol? In any case some servant or other should have done it long before they parted. What a lack of planning...

"Useless" the young and Pol: Wash, clothe and heal Gen

Gen: lol they're so useless I hate them, despite being incapable of doing either of those things myself

Well, he was impressed afterwards, I admit, and then Pol (Paul?) had to ruin it by being an idiot. Lmao when is ever a good idea to take a dirty unsanitized knife to an open wound and stab it in the infected sores of an underfed peasant boy?

Then the gag- ugh the cringe, what a bunch of douchebags. Imagine causing pain to someone intentionally and then getting annoyed that they scream. Not even Ramsey Bolton is this cruel, lmao I hate all of them I hope they actually die.

#testing reads the thief #the queen's thief #chapter ii #Sophos #Gen #Magis #is that his name? pt.2 #long post

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booasaur · 4 years ago

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i’m closeted around my family and seeing ppl say stuff like “if they won’t come out to their parents they don’t love you enough, extenuating circumstances only apply if they’re financially dependent”. it’s a really hard difficult situation to be in and it’s not abt the s/o so much as it is abt the person themselves. don’t we deserve the freedom to choose who and how we share ourselves?

All right, back to answering these! Sorry I took so long.

Honestly...your ask really made me rethink some things I’d always taken for granted. First I’ll just preface this by saying I’m mostly thinking out loud and offering questions, I’m not insisting on or condemning or judging anything, and certainly not dismissing what people’ve lived through or their choices.

So my original answer to this was going to be to loosely agree with your points and then use them to pivot to John’s speech about everyone’s coming out journey not being the same, because as you both said, it’s not about the partner at all, and was going stay focused on the movie but you’ve really made me consider what coming out and closeted even really mean, on a much larger scale. Because Harper has come out where she lives, right. She’s not hiding herself there, she’s affectionate and loving and by Abby’s own account, a totally different person than with family. So we don’t just mean she has to come out, we mean she has to come out to her family. Why? Like truly, your last point, how come this doesn’t get the same treatment about consent and privacy as everything else? And let’s not say, oh, of course it’s up to you when you come out, nobody should out you, because the message from all directions, within the community and without, is very much that you eventually do have to at some point.

Even in this movie, John’s lovely speech STILL does imply that this is an end destination someone has to be “ready” to finally get to. If they don’t, that’s a failure to get there. And this is of course oversimplifying the fact that some people may come out to a sibling or one parent first or only them ever. But like, really, as you said, why is it seen this way, to prove people aren’t ashamed of themselves, of their gayness, of their partner, that literally, if they love their partner, they have to risk losing their family? Because what else is that saying? Knowing John’s own story, knowing that Harper had just admitted she was scared of telling and losing them, what did Abby’s I want someone who’s ready then mean, if not that? Someone ready to tell their parents and risk losing them, no? And this isn’t at all bashing Abby or even the movie, it’s just this overriding expectation. She’s of course valid in wanting to date someone out (though, again, in the ways that most affected Abby’s life, Harper was out--leaving out this trip from hell that it would also be completely understandable to want to escape from) but in the context of that moment, what else did it mean? And this isn’t the only media that does it, so many stories out there do.

I remember we briefly discussed this because of April from TBH, and even there, a character who is financially dependent on her family and with a conservative, violent father got some flak for not coming out. GLOW did this recently too, and Little Voice, where the queer person who wasn’t fully out is hiding their True Selves and ashamed and how no out person will want any part of that. And then the person comes out and hardly ever is the reaction as bad as it would most likely have been in real life, including for Harper. Why is this narrative so pervasive? “Just stop being a coward and it’ll all turn out okay.”

I mean. I do get WHY. It is an incredibly important step. For a lot of people, their family are the first and closest people they feel like they have to and want to tell, especially if they're young and/or live at home. And if we don't tell them, how do we push things forward for the community, and we've fought for so long to live openly like this, gay pride is what it is for a reason, and what good is being loved without being known and ultimately, it is traumatizing being closeted. People want to share this and have others share with them and keeping this huge secret that you know is unjustly forced upon you does take a mental toll. Agreed, agreed, agreed. But then why make it even worse by adding shame and guilt and pressure on top of it, you know? Surely there’s a middle ground. I get that there needs to be a strong motivation sometimes, otherwise people might stay in a kind of closeted “comfort zone” and end up missing out on surprisingly positive experiences, but maybe people shouldn’t be pushed either way. Some of us who think we might not ever may still yet decide we want to, but I have confidence that those people coming out in their own time would do so even without this stigma attached to the closet. Nobody stays in there because we want to. We all feel that same need to tell our families, all those reasons above apply to us, too. Circumstances are just different sometimes.

And the funny part is, I do think Harper is a person who should come out to her parents, because it matters that much to her. She’d never be happy without telling them. It goes without saying she shouldn’t have lied or brought Abby within a hundred miles of them before it was all sorted. But, say, a different person in her situation, one who told Abby she had no plans to come out to her parents anytime soon and either went home alone or not at all...is that so bad?

#hs closeted messages #6 #whew #now you know why it took so long #honestly this is the first time I've ever looked at it like this myself #and still pondering it #replies #femslash related stuff #sent on 20201127 #Anonymous #happiest season spoilers #happiest season

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otonymous · 4 years ago

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hiii, first off i love your works 🥺💕 they’re so good and that angst 😪👌 gorgeous. sooo, i myself am also a fanfic writer and tbh that’s what i’ve always specialized in when i first started writing. that’s why when i say this, it honestly hurts me a bit... but i feel like i’m gonna outgrow writing fanfics. what makes me feel sad is that, i don’t actually want to outgrow it. i just feel like at my age i shouldn’t be writing it or smth along those lines. like whenever ppl ask me my hobbies my immediate thought is always writing. then they proceed to ask what genre and i always feel kind of scared to say fanfic since i feel like i’m kinda getting old for that... i still love reading it ofc, tbh it’s better than a lot of actual books i’ve read. but i just feel that if i say it out loud people will judge me. (that last one is more of a self confidence issue but yeah 😞) seeing you and other fanfic writers rlly inspire to continue doing it but i’m not rlly sure anymore ig. i still love writing it, i do. but ig i’m just scared to tell others? i’m not sure... but what would you do 👉👈😞

Hello dear Nonny!

Thank you very much for your kind words! I really appreciate all your support! 💖

Furthermore, thank you for sending me this very important Ask. I honestly think it’s something that a number of fanfic writers may come across at some point or another. Let’s examine this question from a few different perspectives.

1) Many famous authors write fanfiction

Just for the record, there are a slew of published authors who have written fanfiction at some point in time.

Naomi Novik, for instance — founder of the Organization for Transformative Works (from which the Archive Of Our Own is derived!) and author of Uprooted— wrote fanfiction. So did Andy Weir, author of The Martian. He wrote fanfics based off of Ernest Cline’s awesome Ready Player One.

(Check out this article by Catherine Kovach on Bustle.com for more!)

So as a fanfiction writer, you’re in good company. It doesn’t make you any less a student of the craft than someone who dabbles solely in original work.

2) Everyone doesn’t need to know everything

That being said, I still feel you, dear Nonny. You may be at a party, meeting new people, and the question inevitably comes up: “So, what do you do for fun?”

And while there is no way of knowing beforehand who would be absolutely thrilled to have a fanfiction writer in their midst (for the record, I know I would’ve been even if I didn’t write them myself), there is also a chance that some people may not understand it. And that’s perfectly fine too. If you think about it, belonging to a fandom is a very special thing. You, along with massive numbers of others (depending on how big your fandom is), have some sort of common ground which serves as a source of joy, fun and excitement. It allows you to connect with people from all walks of life, all over the globe. I know my life is enriched by the fandoms of which I’m a part of. It’s honestly a wonderful thing.

But to the uninitiated, the concept may seem a bit alien. They might not get it. And if you’re concerned about what they might think to learn about your beloved hobby for any reason, then I would be inclined to say that they don’t need to know everything.

So if I were to find myself in a situation where I was uncomfortable with full disclosure, I would just simply state that I write fiction. Romance, fantasy, adventure, horror, comedy, sci-fi, etc., all of these genres are found in the wonderful fanfics I’ve read. If someone were interested in finding out more about what you write, try describing it in those terms.

3) You never outgrow the things you love

Based on your Ask, dear Nonny, I get the sense that you feel like some things have an “expiry date,” that once you reach a certain age, you should’ve moved beyond things you loved and enjoyed in the past, such as fanfiction.

There are some people who are old and grey and still live their lives to its fullest, smiling with a twinkle in their eye that makes them seem much younger than their years. And then on the flip side, there are people who seem much older than they really are, perhaps by the way they carry themselves. My point here is that age really is nothing but a number, and (biology aside) you are as old as you choose to feel. No one has the right to dictate what is deemed acceptable behaviour for another person of a certain age, as long as what they’re doing isn’t hurting themselves or others.

I’m aware that societal pressures exist, that we may feel like we have to conform to what others expect of us — family, friends, etc. But we also have to remember that at the end of the day, this life is ours to live. And it would be a very sad life indeed if we lived it solely according to the standards of those around us, allowing ourselves to be stripped of the things we hold near and dear, such as hobbies we thought we should’ve outgrown.

There are times when I like to engage in a thought experiment that goes something like this:

If this were my very last day on earth, what would I most want to do? What kind of life would I have liked to have led? What do I want to be remembered for?

Time is precious. We can’t afford to waste it on caring about what others think of us. Chase what makes you happy, my dear. No one has the responsibility of living your life but yourself. And it is you that you only need answer to.

I hope this helps you in some way, shape or form, dearest Nonny. I wish you the best of luck in your writing journey. 💖

- XOXO, Otonymous

#q&a #anonymous #thank you so much #hope this helps!#fanfiction #advice #writing advice #life advice #naomi novik #ao3 #andy weir #ernest cline #source: giphy

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veldian · 4 years ago

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tell us more of ur think tank hcs i personally am at the edge of my seat

HELL YEAH ALRIGHT HERE WE GO. some of these might be against canon in some way but that's your fault for trusting me with this

ALSO, AS USUAL, I HAVE TO APOLOGIZE. THIS GOT VERY LONG. when i think about the tanks i go fuckin wild with it

starting with pride headcanons to get the ball rolling

all the tanks are nonbinary, but additionally, dala is a trans woman and 0 is a trans man

8 hates gender he fucking hates it. every day he wakes up and says "today i will make gender my bitch" and then he does. he says this in the game too you just don't know cuz he only speaks in static (don't factcheck this)

if you ask 8 what pronouns she uses, they will shrug and give you a "i dunno" noise. sometimes it'll make a non-committal hand movement and some unintelligible noises. good luck

god this bitch (borous) is gay! good for him! good for him.

he's also intersex! i don't remember where we got that hc but i like it and im holding onto it

okay but borous calls himself bi because yeah Men, but he also loves dala very much and doesn't want to misgender her. also as previously stated, 8's main goal is to confuse everyone about their gender so the tanks all stick with mspec labels to be on the safe side. you never know what'll happen. gender is a ticking time bomb

bi gang: klein, borous, 0

pan gang: dala, mobius

don't ask her about any of her identities she doesn't know the answer either: 8

have i gone off about polytank dynamics enough? i don't think so

8 and dala started dating first because horny bitches gravitate towards each other. they can also "pass" as a "straight couple" so hopefully no one at work will look at them and call them slurs. hopefully

klein and borous knocked things out of the park for being the first gay scientists ever

8 and dala became polyam icons and pulled 0 in. trans bitches gravitate towards each other

klein and borous did the same with mobius. bitches with facial hair gravitate towards each other

???????

idk and then all six of them started dating somehow. the end

somewhere along the way klein and 8 were like "i like you a little too much" and now they're inseparable

okay anyway. misc hcs

ive mentioned this before but when i pretend everything is in modern times, 0 is a tiktokker and he thrives on the attention and making fun of his coworkers on the internet

"watching steven universe repeatedly when i felt even slightly bad transed my gender" - doctor 8 old world blues

i just remembered i made a carrd for the tanks as if they were kinnies in their early to mid 20s

8 kinned pearl su. borous kinned werewolf cookie. 0 kinned rimmer red dwarf. mobius kinned... morbius forbidden planet. obviously. klein refused to put his kins on it. DID DALA KIN FROM DANGANRONPA

i think at one point we had a half-joking hc where klein gets nauseous if he sees blood

and then that changed to he can't see others blood, only his own

while borous can't see his own blood, but he's fine seeing other ppl's

i know borous said that gabe barked at everyone, but i think gabe trusts the other tanks because he knows borous does

borous set up a kissing booth with gabe. the crowd goes wild

when the tanks get together they usually go to klein's. he's the leader or something. also he has a fucking bar in his house.

he complains about them the whole time but you can really tell he loves having people over. why else would he deck his house out like that? he LOVES hosting stuff. house husband

if you saw my chart where i said klein would rather die than do dishes, i was so wrong. his house is pristine. its easily the cleanest

klein's love language is acts of service. he goes over to his partners' houses when they feel awful and clean stuff up for them when they can't. he also makes them food if they want it. he only complains a little, but you can tell he's mostly teasing

did you know klein has five mugs in his kitchen in-game. he's literally prepared to host his partners at any given moment.

the group have learned that letting 8 come over when their house is a mess is a Huge mistake. it goes from 8 trying to help "tidy up" to "im going to put your books and albums in alphabetical order by artist also your clothes are going to be hue-sorted"

"8 why are there only 8 books on each of my bookshelves"

"it looks better"

"it literally does not"

8 can no longer stomach going into 0's house

on the other hand, 0 hates staying in 8's house. the ticking of all their clocks is sensory hell

on 80 date nights they have to do rock-paper-scissors for which house they go to. or they go out. they love each other but their houses drive the other fucking nuts

oh speaking of their houses. yes dala said she didn't like Literal Teddy Bears but that is null and void considering she has teddies in her house

and she has 5 on her bed. five of them :)

she named all of them after her partners! its mostly cute but there is a slight bit of concern because they know what she does with them <__<

not that 8 has any place to judge. mobius found batteries under its pillow once. all 8 said was "they can vibrate." mobius regrets touching them.

i don't know what to say about dala's mannequins i don't have anything funny im just scared

WHY ARE 0 AND KLEIN THE ONLY ONES WITH BATHROOMS IT DRIVES ME INSANE 0'S BATHTUB ISNT EVEN LAYING DOWN ITS AGAINST THE WALL WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT GENERATOR IN HIS BATHROOM DO THE OTHER TANKS JUST SHIT OUTSIDE I'M SEEING RED

mobius and 0 are both into robotics, and they worked together to make muggy, so they've had date nights where they mainly tinker with electronic things.

0 gets very excited when he makes a breakthrough, and seeing that warms mobius's heart. mobius made a habit of kissing 0 on the forehead or squeezing 0 into a hug when they figure things out.

(0 remembers he likes men.) 😳

dala/klein date nights are essentially just them drinking and gossiping chatting

i asked polycule for some more, so here are ones from your local think tank kinnies

borous -

"klein and borous both like classical music in very different ways. klein mostly likes it to feel smart (see: wheatley) but he just started associating it with the others so it felt nicer And borous just likes it bc hes borous"

klein also likes jazz, but so do all the rest of them

8 has a cochlear implant

"dala likes dressing up to look pretty (see: runway) but is personally embarrassed by it (until she gets encouragement) bc she feels like the others dont support that"

"0 loves collecting and reading those stupid magazines with the birthday party products and themes that ud wanna buy from as a kid but are way too expensive"

"mobius has a secret love for puppetry and will try to bring it up sometimes whenever he can. hes made 3 separate sets of the other tanks as puppets and they freak 0 out"

"borous, in an attempt to better his faults, has started learning from dala and 8 on how to take care of plants instead of what he did before. his basement turns into a cool little green house cozy cuddle area"

"to add on: 8 gardens to cope whenever hes alone bc (projects onto ur kin) he mood drops very fast when alone"

"mobius likes dressing in cozy sweaters and fancy stuff"

0 -

"0 doesn't like anal that much" (thanks.)

dala -

"their new rap album called boyz in the tanks" (THANKS.)

and to top things off, :) here are the normal names for them all, created primarily by our borous kinnie

klein - Ernest Klein (nicknamed ernie)

mobius - Wilbert Mobius (nicknamed bert)

borous - James H. Borous (nicknamed jamie)

dala - Dala Theodore (HER NICKNAME IS TEDDY ITS GENIUS)

8 - Emmett Handley (nicknamed 8 + emmy)

0 - Robert O'Barrick (nicknamed 0/O + robbie (HIM SHARING HOUSE'S NAME IS INTENTIONAL. HE'S TRANS HE PICKED HIS NAME WHY DID HE DO THIS))

#tech.txt #old world blues

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clandestine-j · 3 years ago

Text

Gossip Girl Reboot, Ep. 2 Reaction / Review

This was posted on reddit first, crossing posting it here since I’ve chosen to review the ep’s and post on tumblr as well. So, this post is geared more towards reddit as a whole, this was posted a day after ep 2 aired.

i don't have a favorite character rating but #teamaki, yeah, the acting is awkward but it's getting better and it's not like it's the only bad acting in the show. i like the character either way.

now

people are so extra with zoya and obie and are looking at julien with the rose colored classes. yeah, obie shouldn't be dating zoya but let's not act like julien gave her all and everything to him. from the conversation with zoya in ep 1, his general feelings, audrey calls it out (maybe because she always feels that way)

She admits it at the end, she wouldn’t do the things he wanted when it came to his interest, he’d want to do random and fun things and she’d blow him off...how is this mart of someone fully invested in their other, no, she was invested what he did for her and how he made her feel. She misses him because in their other breaks he’d always come back. We saw a dying relationship and ppl can assume a lot about him but make 0 assumptions when it comes to her.

And then y’all expect Zoya to turn down the one person who’s actually nice, doesn’t ice her out and shares interest? What I want more than anything is for Zoya to find her own friends & her romantic interest, just one episode where her life isn’t an extension of Julien's. Idk wut, maybe she can go off on a find out gossip girl adventure. Idk something.

Then this talk about sisters and sister hood. Yeah, they’re blood related but what sisterhood is there? You say that’s is wrong for Zoya to do that to her sister but what about what her sister did to her? Even in this ep, she wants Obie so instead of idk driving Zoya away from him, she attacks her lil ‘sis’ over her long time boyfriend. She continues to let her friends talk bad about the girl. We can talk sister hood when she gives the mean team a good “learn me or leave me” when it comes to Zoya

At the of ep 1 Zoya says, she’s not playing the game. She’s grounded in fear of losing her scholarship, has already lost her dads trust. So she does that, she keeps her head down and doesn’t bother anyone but it’s the mean team to prompt Julien to after Zoya and she does. She’s minding her business at the even and Julien is the one to storm over and cause a scene. And it’s all about her, she’s scared of her dad finding out without any care that Zoya has lost and what she has left to lose. Of course she doesn’t care about Julien personal problems? When did Julien care really about hers? Then, she wants to sneak away and have fun and because she’s mad Zoya won’t run off and hide like a hood little girl, she once again collabs with GG, brings in the dads and fucks her sisters life up, AGAIN. Yeah, she changed her mind at the end but too little too late. Her come to jesus moment was great but the relationship she wanted/wants it very much damaged.

So yeah, Zoya dating the one person who has empathy for her is not as bad as the older sister who consistently let her be talked down, about and two, plotted with GG and didn’t even ask her if she was okay because, she didn’t mean it, it’ll blow over. Even in the very last apology when Zoya was about to leave, you could see that she had 0 faith in Julien, not only as a sister but as a person.

Which leads me to saying that Julien is probs the most interesting character of the show. She’s lovable and flawed and she is good but she as of right now, she’s mean at worst and horribly complicit at best because right now her career is a bit more important but her 14 year old sister doesn’t deserve the headache of navigating her with her. But I do love Julien because she has layers and I think by the end, she’ll be able to have her influencer career without compromising herself. That does lead us to the the chairmen and co-chair of the mean team.

Monet and Luna weren’t around as much but I do think...I do think...that if Julien goes nice, they’re gonna go super nasty. They have access to her life which mean access to that video if Julien didn’t out right delete it or they find out about it and snooping. They’re her friends but unlike her, they don’t have a much of a Conscious so far of right and wrong and they’ll strike anyone down. I think if we have wild cards, they’re it. If Julien really does go down a new path, learns more to fight for what matters and understand the real her is just as likable, the mean duo will not accept and will try and bring her down. They have their own meaning of friends with benefits.

My dude Obie, I can’t say much. I don’t think he’s as Malicious as y’all make him out to be but he is a bit callous and naïve...which could be worse tbh. I think he does want to do good but he only knows Performative good to counter-act his parents. I do want him to get with someone else but I do hope he learns what true activism means through Zoya and understand how much of a difference he could make if he really put his mind to it. I also want him to learn get out quick, because he wasn’t just looking for a reason to end things but one to stay and Julien didn’t give him that.

Audrey, I like the stuff with her mom. I like the little bit more depth we got, she slept with Max maybe but Aki made out with him, who am I to judge? I hope her mon can step up in the future but I don’t think it’ll be easy and hopefully they explore it more. Not just tease us. Her mom needs therapy but I think I'm a bit invested in her too.

Max, I love max but the dude is Pretentious ~ above earthly love ~ low key a shitty friend and talks in metaphors whenever he has the chance BUT he does it well. I don’t see him with Aki but I want it! I do see him going harder after Audrey but I think he was a bit shocked for all his flirting that he was into the kids with Aki. I think he lives to play with people. I don't know if he really likes Audrey but he does want to bang her, a lot, a lot a lot. I don't think he really wanted to sleep with Aki but he did like playing with him and he could pick up the fact that Aki might be feeling him. I don't think the interest was really, real until Aki kissed him at the pool, home boy was shocked and was like oooo maybe something is there but his focus is on the teacher. And I also think the not in a million years thing had his gears turning too. You tell him it can't or won't happen and now he wants to make it happen.

Aki, my baby, my voice of reason. What makes him great as a person, makes him not great for Audrey when it comes to emotional stuff. He means well and I get where he's coming from with wanting Audrey to understand her mom but she did need a partner. The thing she loves about him is the thing that makes it hard. I don't know how Aki was brought up but I feel like this plays into it, she's always comparing him to a therapist. I wonder if his parents a bit more emotionally cold or curt or just very analytical people. But, like he's been lovely since ep one, the only one of the group to sort of defend Zoya or Julien wanting to know her / keep her secret. (What secrets does he have?) And in ep 2, he really was like 'ya'll fucked in the head' to the mean team. I know some consider him boring because he doesn't speak up often but when he does speak up, he got something to say. I want the show to use him in a way to stir drama just by being friends, his character doesn't have to have a dramatic effect and he could get his own little subplot that's tied into the show but like, my can't become some douche. (If he does, only for a bit.) Now, I don't see Max being endgame for him AT ALL. If it's between the two, Max would go for Audrey for sure while leading my boi on in ways, he could even really start to like him but endgame no. I'd love to see a scene with Max does get jealous of Aki with another dude, in a romantic way or the dude could be hitting on him, I think Aki would be able to humble him just a bit because no one really seems to know what he's thinking. In the end, idk who he ends up with but I want him to find someone who will do my dude right and he should get some non-shitty friends who'll listen to his problems. (Still not over that Max)

The teachers while being shown more, don't have much of a presence. It's mainly Kate and the goofy one for extended scenes. KATE MY GOOD SIS. NO. Please, I want this to be the point where she loses GG somehow and someone takes over or maybe another GG pops up, can market better and isn't willing to have a faltering moments. I want it to spiral. Spiral hard. Also, sexy teach said not on my watch ezra! I stan him. Teachers are still fun for me, they make me want to never teach at a dumb rich private school.

Also, fuck the dads within reason. Esp, Julien's dad but only because we got to see Zoya's more and he is kinda in the right about most of the stuff but not the sister stuff. You can tell he's doing his best to instill morals in his daughter esp when he knows she can fall to outside influences.

Overall, I'm still enjoying it, I'm invested. I see room for growth for all of the characters (maybe not the teachers) and I want to see it play out. It does feel a little rushed but I think they're finding their footing and they have some big things to pull. But's not horrible and if they just play the drama bit longer and then conclude, it wouldn't feel that way. Maybe one more episode or half an episode could've been added to the Zoya-Obie-Julien story line to fully flush it out but I like the ending. Not sisters, not friends but cool with each and possibly re-build, at worst they just don't interact. I noticed some cool things with the promos but I need to confirm when I can find the one for 3.

Sorry if it went from all lower case to proper-ish, I had to switch to my phone and it auto-does it.

#c;gg #gossip girl reboot #gossip girl hbo

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petersasteria · 5 years ago

Text

Anger Issues - Harry Holland

Requested? Nope. I’ve been meaning to write this for so long and decided “fuck it” whether ppl will read it or not lmao what’s important is I finally release some decent content and I like it and that’s important.

Pairing: Harry x Reader

Words: 4,307

Masterlist

* * * *

"Please wait here and the doctor will call you when it's your turn." the assistant tells you before leaving the waiting room. You look around and see two guys there. One of them had his hands in his pockets, his hood up, and his head nodding along to the music going through his earphones. In short, he looks like your average everyday mysterious emo guy from high school. The other guy looks the total opposite. He was like the guy everyone liked, but not exactly popular. He was on his phone, chuckling from time to time. He was wearing a blue sweater and some worn out jeans.

You sit across from them and the two guys look at you. You give them a tight-lipped smile. Emo guys rolled his eyes, but the guy next to him smiles back at you. It wasn't a fake smile either. It was a genuine smile.

'Seems like a nice guy.' you thought to yourself.

The less emo guy puts his phone in his pocket and starts up a conversation, "I've never seen you around here before and we're here every week. What-"

"Can you just shut the fuck up, Thomas? Why do you have to talk all the fucking time?? You're so fucking annoying. Maybe that's why your girlfriend left you for that other guy." emo guy snaps.

You and 'Thomas' look at him. While you were shocked at his mini outburst, 'Thomas' looked like he was used to it, though. "You don't have to speak like that whenever you're annoyed at someone, Harry." Thomas tells him in a soft and comforting voice.

"Wow. Look at you being a big brother for once!" Harry says sarcastically. "And the brother of the year award goes to...Thomas Stanley Holland! Give it up for him everybody!" He claps his hands. At this point, you and Thomas are beginning to feel uncomfortable. Especially you; you've never met these people before.

Thomas looks at you with a sorry expression, "I'm sorry about Harry. Anyway, I assume you heard my name already-"

"Of course she did. She has ears, dipshit." Harry mutters under his breath before taking his phone out of his pocket and scrolling through it.

"You can call me 'Tom'." Tom smiles, ignoring Harry. "What's your name?"

"Y/N." you tell him. Tom nods before looking at Harry then at you. He gets up from his seat and immediately sits next to you. You were a bit... scared. A stranger suddenly sits next to you after his brother shouts at him in anger isn't exactly an ideal way of meeting and getting to know someone.

Tom seems to notice your change of demeanor and chuckles, "I won't do anything, don't worry. It's just nice to see someone else in this place on a Saturday morning. It's usually just me and him and sometimes Sam, our brother, tags along too. But most of the time, just me and him."

You nod and feel yourself getting comfortable with Tom. "So, why are you alone? It's hard seeing a psychiatrist alone for the first time. I mean, it's not Harry's first time here, that's for sure. But if I were in your place, coming here with someone closest to me would make me feel less scared and nervous. Even if they don't go inside the room with you, it's nice to know that there's someone in the waiting room who's waiting for you and who's there for you every step of the way." Tom rambles.

"My parents dropped me off and then they said that they'll come back for me when I text them as soon as I finish here." you tell him truthfully.

"Well, they're shitty parents." Tom crosses his arms, "No offense."

"None taken." you chuckle. "They are shitty parents, though." Tom laughs and shakes his head.

The door opens and the current patient quickly in tears. The patient practically ran, not giving you a chance to see if it were a girl or boy. You look at the direction they came from and see the psychiatrist standing there. You look at the psychiatrist in fear.

You turn to Tom and whisper, "Why the fuck was that patient crying? Is this lady batshit crazy? Does she always make them cry??"

"Of course not." Tom whispers. "All I know about that last patient is that they're always here three times a week. I know, because I've asked before."

"Harry, you can come in now." the psychiatrist smiles at him. Harry rolls his eyes and stands up, getting his backpack (which needed to be washed) from the floor.

"You'll get through this today, Harry! I'm right here." Tom smiles at him, cheering him on as if Harry were to compete at something. Harry looks at him, gives him a fake smile, and the middle finger before entering the room, the 'click' of the door being closed was heard immediately after he went in.

"Now it's just you and me." Tom says. "What do you usually do here when you're alone waiting for Harry?" you ask curiously, obviously bored out of your mind.

"I just go on my phone. Sometimes I bring my homework and do it here. But since I don't have homework at the moment, I'm as free as a bird." Tom answers. "Speaking of phone, let's exchange numbers! It'll be so much fun having a new friend!"

Thomas Stanley Holland was too bubbly for your liking. But you exchanged numbers anyway. Even social media usernames.

After two hours of chatting with Tom, you come to realize that he's genuinely a nice and friendly guy. You really had fun talking to him. Harry emerges from the room with the same mysterious emo look on his face. "Let's go, Thomas."

"Hey champ! How was it?" Tom smiles.

"Are you fucking mocking me?" Harry asks, his temper slightly rising.

Judging by the little time you've known Harry, you've come to conclusion that he's in therapy for his anger issues. You notice that the little things seem to tick him off. The dude's a fucking time bomb.

"Harry, I was just asking nicely. I didn't mean to offend you. Please don't get mad at me." Tom says in that comforting and soft voice.

An outsider would think that they're complete strangers who are fighting, because at this point, it's hard to believe that they're siblings.

"I wouldn't have gotten mad if you just followed me when I said that we should go home. I wouldn't have gotten mad if you didn't open your fucking mouth." Harry said in sort of a Draco Malfoy tone.

Tom looks at you and quietly says, "I'll text you." He stands up and follows his brother on his way out.

"Y/N, it's your turn." the psychiatrist says.

"Welp, here goes nothing." you say to yourself before going in the room and closing the door.

"Hello Y/N. I'm Dr. Joanne Moore. But you can call me Joanne, so that it's less intimidating." Joanne smiles. "Please take a seat and make yourself comfortable."

Joanne motions for you to sit on the couch while she sits across from you on the spinning office chair everyone loves. You do as she says and you let yourself relax as your gaze wanders around the room. The room was neither small nor large and the only light source was the sun shining outside; its rays coming through the window.

"I understand that you're new here. Where are you from?" Joanne asks.

"New York." you reply. Joanne hums and nods, "Why did you move here?"

"My father is English and my mother is American. My mom told my dad that maybe it'd be best to move to a new environment. She's basically sick of New York. Around the time she said that, my dad got offered a new job here with a salary higher than what he was paid back home. Then, the rest is history." you respond. You've been repeating the same response to your neighbors and to everyone you meet, so you completely memorize it like the back of your hand. You can say shit in your sleep.

"I see. Welcome to London." Joanne smiles. You mutter a small 'thank you' before leaning back on the couch.

"Would you like to tell me why you're here?" Joanne asks.

"I thought you'd never ask." you lightly chuckle.

"Y/N, is that you?!" you hear a familiar voice from your left side. You turn your head and see Tom with a smile on his face, "Oh my god, it is you! I didn't know we had the same school. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Um, I didn't think it was necessary?" your answer came out more like a question.

"Of course, it's necessary. We're best friends now!" Tom grins. He looks behind him and says, "Guys, come here!" A group of guys walk in your direction with Harry following behind them.

"Guys, this is Y/N the girl from therapy." Tom introduces. "Y/N, this is the gang: Harrison, Sam, Jacob, and of course you know Harry."

"Hi everyone." you smile politely.

"Hey you don't have an accent too!" Jacob smiles. "I'm from Hawaii. What about you?"

"New York." you smile proudly. You were beginning to feel homesick and talking about New York would make you feel much better.

"That's so awesome! I've been there once. It was family vacation and I had so much fun there! Maybe there was a slight chance we bumped into each other while I was there or something." Jacob tells.

"Are we going to class or are we going to stand here all day while Jacob tells his New York escapade?" a voice from the back startles everyone even though they knew who it belonged to. The five of you look at Harry and mutter apologies to which Harry replied with "whatever" and rolling his eyes before leaving the group.

"My twin has left, lady and gentlemen." Sam says to all of you.

"Wait, he's your twin?" you ask in shock.

"Yup." Sam confirms. "Hard to take in, right?"

You nod in agreement. "Let's go to class. I don't want to be late on my first day." you chuckle nervously.

"You'll be fine! We'll probably have classes with you." Harrison says, calming your nerves a bit. "Good luck if you have a class with Harry, though. He's hard to work with. He kind of wants to do his own thing, but he helps even though he's like that."

Harrison's heads up about Harry made you not want to share a class with him.

Luck wasn't on your side, however. As soon as you enter your first class, which is history, the only empty seat was next to Harry. You take a deep breath before walking to the empty seat next to him.

"Oh great." Harry mumbles. Understanding his issues, you bite back a reply and just take in everything that's happening. Everyone is talking to each other except for you and Harry despite the fact that you know each other. To be fair, you aren't close with him. You're closer with Tom, so you didn't know what Harry liked to talk about.

Just then, the teacher arrives and everyone went to their proper seats. The teacher looked like she was in her mid 30s. She looked nice.

"Before we start, we have a new student from New York." she smiles at you. "Please, introduce yourself to everyone."

Harry turns to you and sees your shocked face. Upon seeing that, he chuckles and shakes his head, "Just get it over with." Hearing Harry being normal sounded so foreign to you, but you took his advice and went on to introduce yourself.

"You don't have to stay here in front. Just stand up and tell us about yourself." the teacher says.

"Okay, um, my name is Y/N Y/L/N and I'm from New York. I just moved here, like, a week ago. So yeah...that's it I guess." you awkwardly say and you sit down.

"Welcome Y/N! I hope you enjoy your stay. My name is Mrs. Smith and I'll be your history teacher." Mrs. Smith says. "Speaking of history, let's get started."

Mrs. Smith began to discuss for the rest of the time. Five minutes before the class ends, Mrs. Smith tells everyone that they'll have a project that'll be done in pairs. You didn't know anyone in class except for Harry and Harrison's warning is at the back of your head. So to say that you didn't know what to do would be an understatement.

"I already have a list of pairs and I'll dictate it." Mrs. Smith says.

'Thank god.' you mutter under your breath.

'Fucking hell.' Harry rolls his eyes.

"Y/N you'll be paired with Harry." Mrs. Smith smiles, before continuing. You look at Harry and he looks at you unimpressed.

"I don't usually allow anyone to work with me, but since you're new and you're practically best friends with my brother, I'll give you a chance. That's as far as I can go with being nice to someone." Harry tells you. You just nod, still kind of intimidated by him. "Also," he says again, "back the fuck off when we're out together. I don't like it when people invade my space." Harry fakes a smile and puts his stuff in his bag. You just stay quiet and do the same.

When Mrs. Smith dismisses the class, Harry immediately left. Of course, you followed. You didn't want to be alone in a room with people you didn't know. You'd much rather be stuck with Tom even though he talks too much and is too bubbly. You'd also prefer if you were stuck with Harry and even though he gets angry all the time and he hardly says anything to you, at least he's someone you know.

As soon as you leave the room, Tom and the rest were there to greet you. "Hey!!!" they all greet cheerfully.

"Oh my god what the fuck did I get myself into?" you ask yourself, putting on a smile for them nonetheless.

"Congrats! You survived your first class in your new school." Jacob says. "Are you ready to go through the rest of the day?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." you respond. It wasn't even at least half of the day and you were already tired. Tom and his friends seem to have a lot of energy and seeing them really energized makes you tired.

Saturday comes around again and you're back at therapy. You walk in the waiting room and see Harry there. Now, it's awkward. Like last week, you sit across from Harry and begin to mind your own business. 'He did say "back the fuck off", right?' you think to yourself.

"Tom has a dentist appointment in case you're wondering." Harry's voice startles you. You look up from your phone and see him already looking at you. "It's just me today. Sam is at his part time job and I don't want to bring my youngest brother, Paddy to this depressing place. I don't want him to end up mentally messed up. He doesn't deserve that."

How the fuck are you going to respond to that?

"Oh, I see." you says, still not sure what to reply. "Thanks for telling me, I guess."

"What'll you do after this?" Harry asks curiously.

"I'll probably just walk around or go sight seeing. My parents are on a business trip and all my siblings have their own lives now, because they're older than me." you tell him truthfully. He nods and says, "I have nothing going on at my place at the moment and I want to get away."

You shrug, "Go ahead, then. No one's stopping you."

Harry just stares at you and it's beginning to freak you out, because you don't know if he's going to burst or not. Finally, after almost a minute of silence and staring at each other Harry speaks up, "Do you have money on you?"

"Excuse me?"

Harry rolls his eyes, "Do you have cash right now? I have some stashed in my backpack right now."

"Um, is that even importa-"

"Just answer the fucking question, Becky." Harry says, clearly starting to get annoyed. "Yeah, I do. Why does it matter?" you gulp.

"Good." Harry says. "We'll talk later after your session. It's my turn now." As if on cue, the door opens and the patient from last week quickly runs past you and Harry. He stands up, grabs his backpack and enters the room.

To say you were confused was an understatement. Why was he suddenly talking to you? You decided to text Tom about it.

To: Tom

Hey man hope the dentist thing is going well for u. Harry just said the weirdest shit and idk what to say or feel. Send help xo

You didn't expect a reply, so you went on Instagram and just scrolled through it until it was your turn.

After your session, you were surprised to see Harry waiting for you. He looks up from his phone, takes out one of his earphones and asks, "Ready to go? I'm starving." You just nod and off you two went.

Both of you end up at a sandwich shop far from the building. You both eat in silence and it's beginning to feel awkward; for you at least. Harry seemed fine.

"Let's leave London." Harry says all of a sudden, making you choke on your sandwich. "Jesus, are you okay?" he asks with no concern, whatsoever. He's more worried about both of you causing a scene.

You finally calm down and nod, "Now I'm okay. Where are we going?"

Harry shrugs, "Anywhere we set our mind to. I haven't been outside of London for years. Maybe we could go somewhere to experience a new environment or whatever."

"...London is my new environment." you explain to him.

"I know, dipshit." Harry rolls his eyes, "but you wanted to go sight seeing, don't you?"

"Yeah, around London not outside London."

"What's wrong with going outside of London?!"

"Why're you pushing for us to go outside of London?!" you rebutt.

"BECAUSE I HATE THIS PLACE!!" Harry yells causing everyone in the shop to look at both of you. You flinch at his words and you didn't know what to say. Harry angrily stands up, kicks the chair, and leaves the shop. All of the customers and employees look at you with pity.

"Poor thing." one customer said.

"Wow, worst boyfriend of the year award goes to that guy." the other said.

You gather yours and Harry's belongings and run out of the shop, hoping you're not too late to catch Harry. After looking left and right, you see him standing not too far away and you approach him.

"Hey," you say softly, "you know what? Let's go outside London." You decided that maybe Harry hasn't been getting what he wanted that's why he's always angry, so you'll give him a chance. You also started using the same tactic as Tom: speaking softly which is quite difficult and tiring, but if Tom can do it, so can you.

Harry looks at you and nods. Without saying a word, he grabs his bag from you and walks to the train station. Not wanting to get lost on your second week in London, you rush to follow him before you lose him in the crowd.

"So where are we?" you ask Harry.

"Dorset." Harry responds. "It's probably my favorite place. I don't know why, but it calms me down. I usually go here alone, but I don't want to be alone at the moment." You nod, you understand the feeling.

You and Harry walk around and he shows you the different spots he likes to stay and relax at and somehow, both of you end up on top of a hill. The view was remarkable. It was different from your view in New York and different from your view in your room back in London. This view gave you peace and you're starting to understand why Harry likes it there so much.

You both sit on the grass and sit in silence. Taking in the smell of the sea while your hair was following in the direction the wind is blowing. "How long do you usually stay here?" you ask Harry almost in a whisper.

"Until it gets dark." Harry responds. "Sometimes I don't go home at all. Not like anyone would care anyway. It's boring back at home to the point where it doesn't feel like home anymore. Back in London I just live in a house with three brothers, a set of parents, and a dog named Tessa. Being with them doesn't feel like home."

You nod, "Is that why you go to therapy?" You knew it wasn't your business to ask, but he's starting open up to you about the things he's feeling.

"I think you already know why I go to therapy. I had an episode at the sandwich shop." Harry laughs bitterly. "Maybe the question should be asking me is how I ended up like this."

"I wasn't always like this, you know. Believe it or not, I was like Tom." Harry admits. You didn't say anything, though. You wanted to, but you figured he needed to let it all out.

"It happened two years ago. Kevin, my best friend, and I were walking home from school. We didn't know the bullies from school followed us, but when we noticed them it was too late. For some reason, I was an easy target. So they took my money and taunted me and all that shit. I was used to it, but Kevin had enough. He punched one of the bullies and soon, they were nearly killing each other. I tried to stop them, but two of them held me back while I watched how the 'leader' of the group punched the life out of Kevin. Maybe someone saw what was happening, because the police came. The 'leader' threw one last punch and pushed Kevin before running. The two guys who held me back pushed me forward and ran away too." Harry tells you, his voice becoming shaky.

"I immediately went to check on Kevin and panicked when I didn't feel a pulse. One of the policemen called an ambulance. Then we arrived at the hospital and he," Harry takes a deep breath, tears falling freely down his cheeks, "he was dead on arrival. I guess he got pushed really hard and his head collided on the concrete with so much force. Lethal damage."

"Ever since then, I never forgave myself. I could've done something; anything. But I was just there, watching as my best friend die right in front me." Harry sniffs. "I can't help, but blame myself. He intervened to save me. If I only knew that saving me would lead to his death, I wouldn't have let him. I would've just gave the bullies what they wanted so they can leave him alone. He was the only one who understood me and he knew my secrets."

"I lived with that guilt every day ever since that happened. I could never forgive myself. My family tried to help me move on, but I couldn't. Every time they helped, I pushed them away. Then I started to get irritated with everything they did, like, why can't they leave me the fuck alone?! My parents decided it would be best for me to go to therapy seeing as I won't let them help me. Tom went with me the first time, because I was irritated with him the most. He kept bugging me. And of course, up to this day he still accompanies me." Harry says, wiping his tears.

"So," Harry chuckles lightly, "that's my story. What's yours?"

You chuckle too, "There's nothing special about it, really. My parents just think that there's something wrong with me, but that's not true. At least I think it's not true." Harry just nods for you to continue.

"I'm the youngest in my family. I have three older siblings and they're all married now. My parents are obviously so happy. In fact, they're so happy that they forget about me...all the time. Every time we have this little family lunch or dinner, my parents always ask about how my siblings are doing and shit like that. I've tried, you know? I've tried to push myself to talk to them, but whenever I do, my parents dismiss me and they tell me they're busy or they tell me to shut up, because one of my siblings are talking and it'd be rude to interrupt. I got tired and I just didn't try anymore." you tell him.

"It sucks, man. I have no one to turn to when things get tough. I have no one to be excited for me whenever I have good news. I feel so alone. I only had three friends back in New York and to be honest with you, they weren't even near the level of becoming my best friends. Sure, we hung out and stuff, but I was always their last choice to hang out with. If everyone else is busy, they call me and my stupid ass would answer immediately. Thank god we moved here. New environment is good." you sigh. "I'm really glad I met you guys, though. Tom talks too much, but he's alright. I now have one best friend; how cool is that!"

Harry laughs lightly, "Well, now you have two."

You look at him and give him a small smile, "Are you sure? I'm no Kevin, but I'll try."

"I don't need a new Kevin. Just be you." Harry says, nudging you slightly. "It's nearly getting dark. Should we head back?"

"Sure." you smile. Both of you stood up and grabbed your things before leaving. From that moment on, something told you that you wouldn't be alone anymore and it felt great to finally have someone by your side.

* * * *

Feedback please?

Tagging my mutuals: @sweetdespairbarnes @myblueleatherbag @fanficparker @tommysparker @lcvelyparkers + @justasmisunderstoodasloki (bc this person is nice to me sksks)

Want to contact me?

#harry holland #harry holland imagines #harry holland one shots #harry holland fanfiction #harry holland fanfic #harry holland fic #harry holland x reader #harry holland x y/n #tom holland #tom holland imagines #harrison osterfield #haz osterfield #sam holland

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uncloseted · 4 years ago

Note

How Can I Care Less About My Image Like Effy? Less About Impressing Others And More About Just Doing What I Like Without Letting Them Influence Me?

Anonymous said:

So I have some problems with my confidence. I can be confident at times but it lasts for a very short time and I begin analysing every part of myself and find new insecurities. Sometimes it makes me feel really disgusting so any advice?? Thank you for this blog btw

Anonymous said:

Even though there are people who like me I feel like I'm not a likeable person because I'm insecure and this gets in the way of me socialising, having fun and having good relationships with people. How do I stop feeling this way?

Anonymous said:

last night i had the worst breakdown i’ve had in foreve about how ugly i was, every single detail about myself was so prominent and i’ve fallen so deep down this hole where i couldn’t hate myself more. i’m so unattractive andthat’s the only thing that people give a fuck about , relatives, friends, family, employers, it’s consumed my life. sometimes i’ll look in the mirror and like what i see &for that fleeting moment i’m so fucking happy you can’t imagine but then i go back to seeing the truth

Anonymous said:

I hate myself. How do I mask my insecurities and make people think I'm confident and make it look like don't care about what they think?

Anonymous said:

how can i appear more confident?

Anonymous said:

how do i deal with fear of being judged? I'm always so scared that people I've known for a long time will remember embarrassing things I've done and still laugh at me for it

Anonymous said:

I'm so insecure because I care so much what people think, its so bad that I don't even want to leave my house. When I go out with all my friends, almost all of them get complimented somehow and I never do, it might sound selfish or something but it really brings down my self esteem, I start feeling like I'm invisible or that people only hang out with me because they feel bad for me, and it makes me want to stop being social/getting out of the house, etc.

Anonymous said:

I sometimes hate my face so much and I feel so insecure and it's the worst feeling :( I hope I like the way I look one day but it seems so hard.

Anonymous said:

I can’t be confident with myself, I’m a huge ppl pleaser bc it feels like is the only way to keep them around, and I guess that’s ok but what frustrastes me the most is the fact that ppl don’t see me or my personality, it’s like I’m just there to help them out, to be their side kick... whenever I try to be confident I cringe at myself... How can I feel more secure with myself?

More than any other question, the thing I get asked most is how to build self-confidence, overcome insecurities, and deal with the fear of being judged. In this post, I’m going to put every tip and trick I know about becoming confident, no matter who you are and the situation you’re in.

The first thing to remember about confidence is that people aren’t drawn to people because they’re beautiful, or smart, or kind, or fun, or interesting. People are drawn to people who are confident. If you’re confident and weird, you’re not weird, you’re a visionary. If you’re confident and ugly, you’re not ugly, you’re “unconventionally beautiful” or a trendsetter. If you’re confident and overly serious, you’re not boring, you’re a leader. A lot of people think it’s the other way around- that only beautiful, smart, charming people who are well-liked can be confident- but it’s not true. To use a Skins example, Tony’s not a good person. He’s manipulative and cruel. But people like him (at least in the beginning) and go along with what he says because he’s confident. The same goes for Katie. You can argue about whether she’s objectively the most attractive girl in the group, but she acts confident in herself and in her appearance, and it works. Lots of guys are attracted to her. So that’s the first thing- don’t focus on changing yourself (physically or emotionally) in the hopes that you’ll be more confident. Instead, focus on changing your mindset to that of a confident person. It will make a huge difference.

Of course, that’s all easier said than done, and the process of building self confidence can take a while. In the meantime, while you’re on the journey of actually becoming confident, one thing that can help is “faking it until you make it”. When you’re going about your day, ask yourself, “how would a confident person who’s never experienced insecurity or anxiety handle this situation”? Then do what a confident person would do. If you have a really confident friend, it can help to imagine what they would do in a given situation and then do that. Pretend everyone you meet already loves you and thinks you’re great. Pretend like you think you’re great. It will feel uncomfortable at first, but you’ll start getting used to it and the “confident” responses to things will start feeling normal. One thing that can make this a little bit easier is to talk to yourself in the second person. By saying things like “you’ve got this”, your brain will (sort of) feel like you’re receiving advice from somebody else, which is more motivating than getting advice from ourselves.

There are also some exercises you can use to build your self confidence on your own. Some of you have heard this one before, so bare with me, but the first thing I suggest is: every morning, look at yourself in the mirror and say some things you like about yourself. I know you probably feel like you can’t find any, but try. Focus on those things that you like and try to only focus on those things. Write them down, either physically (on a sticky note on your mirror, maybe) or in your phone. Each day, try to add a new thing to the list. When you’re out and about, remember those things that you like about yourself, focus on them, and try to draw attention to them. When other people compliment you, add those to your list as well. I think eventually by recognizing all of the things that you like about yourself, you’ll be able to feel like there are things about you that you can be confident in, and you won’t focus so much on the things that you feel are negative. These don’t have to just be things that are physical. You should include things you like about your personality as well.

I mentioned this trick the other day, but I want to put it here as well. A lot of people who are insecure use deprecating humor to cope and as a bid to get other people to like them. But I think that can be really emotionally damaging. Like Hannah Gadsby said in Nanette, “I have built a career out of self-deprecating humor, and I don’t want to do that anymore..do you understand what self-deprecation means when it comes from somebody who already exists in the margins? It’s not humility. It’s humiliation. I put myself down in order to speak, in order to seek permission to speak, and I simply will not do that anymore, not to myself or anybody who identifies with me.” Self-deprecation impacts our self-esteem, and it impacts the way people around us view us. The more times we say something, even as a joke, the more we start to believe it, and the more the people around us start to believe it. So instead, make fun of yourself by pretending you’re really, really cocky. If you trip and fall, instead of saying, “I’m such a disaster”, replace it with “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”. If you make a piece of art and you think it sucks, say, “Obviously I’m the next Di Vinci/Michelangelo/whatever.” If you say something dumb, instead of saying, “I’m so stupid,” say, “I’m clearly the next Einstein.” You still get to make a joke and diffuse any awkwardness the situation has, but you also get practice saying nice things about yourself. And eventually, you’ll get so used to saying nice things about yourself as a joke that it won’t feel so weird to say those things about yourself in a serious way, too.

For those people who feel insecure about things they did in their past, try and think of something embarrassing one of your friends has done. Can you think of anything? The vast majority of people remember their own embarrassing moments really vividly, but don’t remember things other people have done at all. Reminding yourself that you’re probably the only one who remembers or cares about the mistake you made can help you let go. The mistakes you’ve made in the past are learning experiences that you’ve grown from and changed from, and the fact that you’re embarrassed by them is a good thing. It means that you’re not that person anymore- that you’ve become someone better. I think that’s something to celebrate instead of something to cringe at. It can also help to talk to yourself as if you were a friend who’s remembering an embarrassing moment. Would you tell them how embarrassing that moment was and how much they suck? Probably not. You’d be nice to them and tell them things will be okay. Talk to yourself like you would a friend.

The fact that people aren’t paying attention to what you’re doing doesn’t just apply to cringey things you did in your past. People are unlikely to remember that one time you tried a new hairstyle or wore an unusual piece of clothing. They’re unlikely to remember that one time you asked someone out and they rejected you. So many of the social pressures we feel can be remedied by remembering that most people are way too worried about what they’re doing and how they appear to the world to care about what you’re doing.

One more piece of advice- stop comparing yourself to other people. The old adage, “comparison is the thief of joy” is totally, scientifically proven to be true. Comparing ourselves to other people (or to TV shows, movies, characters in books, etc) makes us much less happy because we’re comparing everything we know about ourselves, good and bad, with a curated version of this person. We don’t see them when they wake up in the morning with crusty eyes and frizzy hair, or when they have the flu, or when they’re overwhelmed and anxious and lashing out at the people around them. But the truth is that everyone, even the people you think have perfect lives that you see on social media, are just people. They have bad habits and negative traits and days where they’re not at their best, just like the rest of us. If you really want to start being confident, one of the best things you can do for yourself is to mute or unfollow the people who make you feel insecure online, and replace them with people who inspire you- artists or activists or cute videos of animals, whatever works. You’ll never be able to feel good about yourself if you’re constantly tracking all the ways in which you feel you don’t measure up. But you will if you’re constantly seeing all the ways in which you do.

Last thing. Basic life care stuff, like good posture, exercising, eating well, sleeping well, meditating, and just generally practicing self-care and taking care of yourself can improve your confidence as well. If you’re not starting on a strong foundation, it’s hard to build anything that will last. But if your foundation is solid, all of the things you do to build your self-confidence on top of that will be, too.

#Anonymous #effys-closet #effys closet

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twstdreams · 4 years ago

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Thank you so much for the dorm match up! 😊 I am a bit of a chatterbox and I love to discuss on various things. I don't really care what, just as long it's interesting! With subjects I am good with English, History and Geography but I am really bad at match, physics, chrmistry, literally anything of that sort. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I am open with my emotions, if I feel like crying I'll cry, if I feel like laughing, I'll laugh. (1/?)

Also, I am really not good with technology either! I am an INFP and when it comes to people there isn't really a specific personality type I get along with. It's mostly kind of just "if we vibe, we vibe" thing. My friend group is very quirky and varies which makes things so fun! As a person I am quite cheerful, optimistic and bubbly but if I'm in the mood I am quite chaotic! Just really random which freaks some ppl out while others love it, pick your side 😂

I'm a sucker for sweets and yougurt, I can never get enough of that! I also have a passion for scary stories and when I go on walks I love listening to them! I love mythology, faries especially, and I daydream all the time! I get so lost in my world that I sometimes lose track of where I am! I'm generally nice to people I might, maybe a bit shy to some, but still pleasant enough for them to like me.

However I can be quite cold if I don't like some person. I give them the silent treatment and if I HAVE to speak to them I'm just really bitter and snarky. I strongly dislike arrogant people and people who bully. I can also be quite protective over the ones I love and my friends call me that mum of the group, although when the mood hits me I can be a child too. But yeah, mostly the mum friend who worries too much! Is this enough?

Happy Birthday, sweetie! I hope you enjoy this gift!

The shape of thy soul is ... Diasomnia!

You’re not good with technology? No worries, neither is Malleus. Diasomnia is founded on the Witch of Thorns who comes from the Valley of Thorns, a land where most things are magic-based rather than machine reliant. Therefore, no one is going to judge your lack of technical skills

You don’t encapsulate the elegance that Diasomnia students usually emulate. However, considering Sebek is shouting left, right, and centre, Silver is taking naps anywhere and everywhere, and Lilia is currently hanging upside down, it’s not enough to be a deal-breaker

It’s great that you get along with a variety of people because Diasomnia has a wide range of students as well and will help you overcome the aura that the other dorms feel make it hard to approach Diasomnia students

Even if other students don’t have the guts to point it out, Diasomnia, like most of NRC, has its own brand of chaos. Malleus is threatening to light people on fire, Sebek could not stop exalting his young master if his life depended on it, Lilia teleports as he pleases, and Silver has infamous “mad-free space.” You will fit in just fine with the chaos.

Your cheerful, bubbly, and optimistic nature will be welcome! There’s not a lot of sunlight as the dorm as it's modelled after the Witch’s castle, but you can be the designated source of sunshine! Lilia finds your bubbly nature so cute and Malleus finds your optimism refreshing

Your love of sweets will be indulged when there are tea parties! Ignore Sebek’s glaring and forge on, tea and sweets are a lovely combo.

You and Malleus are quite the chatterbox combo! Malleus goes on and on about gargoyles and the stories surrounding them and you adore listening to the ones about haunted ones.

You love asking him about fae customs and he happily obliges given that you’ve listened to his gargoyle tangent. Lilia answers your questions too, but sometimes you wonder if he’s just pulling your leg. Sebek will answer inquiries too but be prepared for a lecture to go hand in hand.

Losing track of where you are? You probably run into Silver napping at random areas. If you decide to wake him up from his impromptu slumber, he’ll be very grateful

Diasomnia is filled with protective friends, so that aspect is easily accepted. What’s the use of all this power if not to protect that which is precious to you?

Your cold and feisty treatment towards those you detest is nothing new at Diasomnia either. Most people are scared of accidentally angering those from Diasomnia as they can’t be dealt with by normal means. There’s a reason others find people from this dorm hard to approach. The fact that you’re not throwing shotput balls fast enough to break bones as a warning already puts you amongst the nicer ones.

Dorms to avoid:

Pomefiore

Being bad at chemistry, and all the sciences in general, will already put you at a major disadvantage at the dorm where everyone excels at magic potions and sorcery

You may love sweets but you probably won’t like the vigorous exercise routine you’ll have to complete first to compensate for any and all desserts you consume

Vil can and will make you cry. Furthermore, he might not even stop his berating even if tears are streaming down your face

Daydream in the middle of Vil lecturing you and you will most likely get smacked right then and there

Not all of Pomefiore’s students are arrogant, some are kind and open-minded to a degree, but you’ll definitely meet people who you’ll want to kick off their high horse

Savanaclaw

You dislike arrogant people and bullies, which this dorm has in spades.

Exasperated sighs fall from your lips as you nearly marvel at how Leona is both so incredibly lazy yet also arrogant.

Cocky upperclassmen who have no issue playing dirty and bullying others also infuriate you. Be careful because they’re not afraid to use magic or brawn to drive a point home

Daydreaming is not really a safe activity at the Savanaclaw dorm given how ready everyone is to fight, even a small slight like bumping into someone is enough to set off a brawl

Other possible dorms:

Heartslabyul

Your love of sweets is thoroughly sated at the Heartslabyul dorm. There are constantly a galore of high-quality sweets thanks to Unbirthday parties and you’ll get your fair share as long as you don’t upset Trey

If Ignihyde is known for little to no social interactions and sticking to itself, then Heartslabyul is the opposite. Like many other Heartslabyul students, you get along with a variety of people. Cater has friends from nearly every dorm, showing her personable Heartslabyul students can be

Don’t mistake this dorm as a cutesy pushover place because of the pretty parties and eccentric activities. Heartslabyul dorm is filled with people who have no qualms getting revenge or doling out punishment.

Riddle screams “OFF WITH YOUR HEAD” at a moment’s notice, and especially if he catches someone breaking the rules more than once. Trey may come off as a serene brotherly figure but he’s ready to dole out fitting passive-aggressive punishments like any older sibling is. Deuce is ready to throw down at a moment’s notice if someone is disrespectful. So your cold and snarky treatment towards those you dislike probably doesn’t even have anyone blinking an eye unless it breaks a rule

Speaking of rule-breaking, having to memorize 810 rules and daydreaming are not two things that mesh well. If you were part of the dorm pre-overblot, it was rough. It probably still is, but you’re trying!

Bonus: Riddle ensures no students fail so even if you suck with anything science or math-related, you’ve got an incredibly smart, tutor

#dorm sorting

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fictional-lover01 · 6 years ago

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How the slasher boys react to S/O being VERY short compared to them

Brahms:

The stinky/sweaty wall boy, he’s precious and has the mind of a child. But don’t let that fool you, of course when he first sees you he’s beyond confused at how someone can be so...tiny. Like he’s been hiding for YEARS but every person that has entered his home were taller than you even by a couple inches. After becoming his “nanny” of sorts he would somehow mock you, placing items higher than what they were originally just to see you struggle to reach anything. And as time flew by he wanted you to be more than just his nanny, so after appearing out of the walls and scaring the ever living fluff outta ya he would chase you, taking advantage of the hiding spots within the house and his towering height. Now let’s face it, after accepting him into your life and y’all love each other (cuz who wouldn’t love this bean) he would have a tendency to use you as a arm rest, placing items high up, randomly picking you up, spooning (HE IS BIG SPOON FIGHT ME), etc. So overall; he’ll abuse your shortness but only to an extend as not to upset you, but nonetheless teases you bc of it.

Jason:

Jason, this sweetheart is secretly a kind giant(prove me wrong) despite him killing a bunch of teenagers that may or maynot have deserved it( they probs did). When Jason was on the hunt to kill you, he was surprised to find him towering over you by more than just a foot; to him- from far away you were probably around average height but as he strode over towards you tiny frame it became more apparent how tiny you were. Jason could hear his mother humming about you, when he was stalking you and your group he’d always catch you being kind and helping out, he also heard how you work with mentally disabled children at a hospital, he knew your “friends” always made fun on your height and constantly teased you with various jokes. And currently mother was telling him to keep you, to protect someone so short so kind from the cruel reality of the world. And that’s why he’s taken to capturing you and bringing you back to his cabin; after being captive under his care you grew to care for him and understand him in a sense, of course since you were very short compared to him he’d always put items lower for you or when you asked for something he’d stand beside you rather than hover behind to reach above you. He’d also likely make sure you have some form of protection while he’s away, BIG SPOON (OBVI) but you have a tendency to just wrap every limb around this giant boi.

Michael:

Michael; a steel tank tbh. How you two met and even developed a relationship is beyond me rn. But nonetheless despite his emotionless appearance (via mask) which he rarely takes off, he still loves you but shows it in his own way. When he first saw you he was intrigued; which is why he stalked you if course, deciding whether or not you’re worth a kill. But as you just accepted him as the killer he is, you were then considered under his protection. He’d constantly watch over you, killing off those who he deemed as a threat. He’d always use you as a arm rest just to get a reaction out if you, place things higher than they need to be; even for him sometimes. He’d also secretly enjoy having you by his side just b/c your presence calms him, that and he likes to see you have to crane your neck just to look up at him. But also for such a tiny person he’s surprised to see you whoop some ass, like that one saying “Short people fight better and are evil because they’re closer to hell”. Now, let’s not forget. For a smol boo you a kinky fuck. No judge though, he enjoys everything about you.

Leatherface:

Considering there’s many versions of the boi I’ll give a overview of them as an entirety. LF is a naturally tall boy, of course he’s lived with his family that has always been shorter than him, so he’s used to having to help get stuff from higher shelves and look down. But to see someone like you being shorter than most of his family was interesting. He’d always pictured you beside him, mentally enjoying how smol you are. He also lived for picking you up and carrying you around like those princesses, he also quite enjoyed watching you pull your weight despite the major height difference. Tbh he (most likely) found it cute and/or hot. Ya know that thing where short ppl climb things to reach, like counters and whatnot? Well ya, you do that ALOT. Though it does worry LF sometimes he knows your careful enough to not magically die (hopefully) but nonetheless still worries and whines when you almost get hurt. LF will also not let you walk down to his lil butcher area, he won’t let you see the victims or anything of the sort; of course with the victims running around they’re bound to see you and beg you for help only to realize you’re part of the family. Seeing as they’re taller than you they usually try to use you as a way out which most definitely pissed LF off beyond compare to anything else but you still manage to whoop some ass and Lf loves that about you.

Thats all I got for today. Maybe will post tomorrow or later if I have the energy to write and stuff ya know? But uh, I may think bout doing requests im not sure atm

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flvcr · 4 years ago

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— ( harry styles, twenty-five, cismale, he/him ) did you see ETIENNE FLUOR walking down main street earlier? you know who i’m talking about, they’re a POTTER / HOCKEY PLAYER. everybody in town says that they’re IDEALISTIC & INTUITIVE, but have a tendency to be UNPREDICTABLE & DESTRUCTIVE too. ETIENNE has been in town for THREE years. c'mon, they’re always requesting RUNNIN’ WITH THE DEVIL BY VAN HALEN at karaoke nights. well, i’m sure you’ll see them soon! @westmerestarters

hiya! i am kt &+ underneath the read more is a LOT of info about my bb, etienne. ** insert clown emoji but make ‘em yee-haw ** if you’d like to plot you can reach me on here or at space cowboy#8536 on discord !! <33 v excited to interact with y’all and your bbs !!

𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖈𝖘

name: etienne ‘ marcel ‘ fluor.

nicknames: goes by marcel, only allowing very few people to call him etienne.

gender / pronouns : cismale / he, him.

age: twenty-five.

birthday: june 27th.

zodiac: cancer !!

orientation: pansexual / panromantic.

occupation: hockey player ( currently injured ) // potter ( for fun ) !!

languages spoken: french, english & italian.

𝖎𝖓𝖘𝖕𝖎𝖗𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓

- PINTEREST - featuring his wardrobe, his home, his aesthetic, some character inspo and olive, his german shepard pup !!

- SPOTIFY PLAYLIST - what he is currently listening to !!

personality type: INFJ-T / THE ADVOCATE

moral alignment: chaotic good

style-wise: etienne is v stylish, but isn’t overly flashy by any means. he’s intuitive in the sense of what works and what doesn’t. willing to explore the latest wardrobe craze, but also just likes what he likes and likely won’t venture out unless pressed by another to do so. post coming soon for his wardrobe !!! they say that the cancer man’s clothing is selected to reflect “ sophistication over flash “ but kdgjn i’ll let ya’ll be the judge of that. he’s v much harry inspired clothing wardrobe, but also tones it down with some casual looks, especially when it comes to getting his hands dirty in creative aspects !! but can be a bit on the flashier side as well, especially w/ hockey press and what not !!

𝖇𝖆𝖈𝖐𝖌𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉

etienne ‘ marcel ’ fluor was born in montpellier, france to two lovely parents, theodore and estelle fluor ( both born in england themselves ) . he is the youngest of his siblings, having one older brother and an older sister, all of them being roughly two years apart. at the age of eight, his family relocated to montreal, canada as a result of a promotion his mother received, which at such a young age, etienne had no qualms with, despite his siblings’ uneasiness. upon moving to a new country at a young age, etienne truly found himself via escaping into various books and movies. often attempting to write his own and would force encourage his siblings to act his skits/plays out for his parents enjoyment. he continues to be very close with his parents and siblings - recently he taught his parents how to use facetime, so catch him face timing his family on sunday nights.

growing up, etienne also enjoyed playing all types of sports ( his parents signing him up hoping that he’d make friends as a result, which he did ). when it came down to it, athletic abilities-wise, there truly wasn’t anything that he wasn’t ‘ good ’ at, and that’s simply because he’s always been such a competitive individual / as well as a perfectionist. that competitive/perfectionist energy caused him to go home and practice a skill or trick for hours in order to be able to come back the next day and whoop everyone’s asses. overall, he’s very athletic, found alternating between various sports offered not only at school, but as well as through local clubs. ultimately, his love and appreciation for hockey swayed him and soon enough it became his sole focus. due to his perfectionist tendencies, etienne is very dedicated to his craft, he will spend hours practicing specific tricks and skills in order to be the best at what he does, which transcends past hockey and into, really, every aspect of his life.

throughout highschool ; etienne was a v dedicated student. although he’s a bit reckless and loved to goof off, he was always acing classes and applying himself. he genuinely cares for others, you could’ve seen his ass volunteering at a soup kitchen with his mom on sundays and what not, as well as take part in various clubs and sports ! just SOFT and sporty things. during this time, he joined the ontario hockey league and from there was eventually scouted out and recruited to the pittsburgh penguins as a defenseman at the age of eighteen - forgoing his parents desire for him to attend a university. although he enjoyed his time with pittsburgh, he was excited when the idea of being traded came up - eager to explore a new city and immerse himself in a new area.

trigger warning - injury, dislocation ( just in case !!!! ) however, he really didn’t enjoy new york ( hehe ), so he relocated to westmere soon after his initial arrival to nyc - finding a lot of comfort in living in a less populated area. he would commute during the hockey season to nyc, which to him wasn’t very far away, so this is where he’s been residing for the last three years !! however, in the last couple of weeks while training for the upcoming season my lil bb injured himself - not to get into tooooo much detail, i’ll just leave it at shoulder dislocation / joint separation due to a hard hit !! basically he’s out for this upcoming season, already having surgery completed, he’s currently healing for the next couple of months, allowing himself to fully experience that westmere fall !!!

overall, etienne can come off as a bit reserved, and distant whether that be a result of his untrusting nature of others, or simply unfamiliarity. it takes a bit of time before he feels comfortable to share his true opinion / commentary / only doing so when he feels secure to do so. he’s not necessarily unfriendly, just a bit distant / lost in his thoughts. which varies, as with most ppl ofc, upon person to person and his level of comfortability among them. despite his often lack of conversation, he abhors an uncomfortable silence to settle and will fill it with nonsense to simply avoid the feeling altogether. so, if you ever want to catch him rambling, just making him uncomfortable dkjfngdf. he definitely approaches most things with a bit of ‘ tough love ‘ . he doesn’t mind getting into a quarrel or two if he knows its worth the outcome he’s envisioned. etienne will tell others when they are fucking up, and if they are throwing a punch as a result - catch him leaning into it, which explains his bout of reckless antics. he can come off as a know it all, when it comes to advice giving, but more so because he thinks he’s really good at analyzing others and situations they are in, not necessarily because he’s lived through them himself, he’s just rather intuitive and able to empathize quite easily with others despite his verbal admittance of it. when it comes down to this binches reckless bits, he just feels so intensely that he ends up numbing himself in the aftermath of it all ( especially bc he’s definitely not sharing those feelings with the people around him ), therefore he’s willing to put himself into harms way in order to get a bit of that - happiness / pain, it doesn’t matter to him as long as he no longer feels overwhelmed by numbness. so, if ya see him with some scrapes and stitches ~ mind ya business. but he’ll likely try to drag somebody else into it, and make it seem like it was their idea. but if he is truly comfortable with somebody, he walks a fine line of won’t stop talking, especially if it’s an interest of his, and comfortable silence.

_________________________

𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖘𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 & 𝖍𝖆𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖘

he is a CANCER, therefore in this essay i will..... kidding but here’s some fun cancer info i saw that applies to my bb !! at first he appears to be wistful, sarcastic ( maybe a lil crabby ) , shy, distant and mysterious. this personality remains if he isn’t completely comfortable around somebody. but overall, that’s just his facade, his ‘smokescreen’ of sorts to scare off the world from his outwards persona. underneath that layer ( makes me think of shrek metaphor with onions // don’t mind me ), BUT he’s gentle, kind and affectionate ( if you manage to make it to that level * bell dings * ) !!! overall, etienne is a sensitive soul, a bit emotional although he’d rather d*e than show that to others. likely will internalize anything that can hurt his feelings / a low blow and will do something chaotic as a result later on bc of it. very polite, and a little worldly, he is truly the epitome of old-school gentlemanly manners. chivalry coming as a second nature to him !!

that was getting ramble-y, so continuing HERE. but when it comes to romance, as per the cancer man, the concept of love is a mystery, one that etienne is trying to attain. however, his shyness and innate distrust of others make it difficult for him to allow himself to fall in love. his guard is always up when it comes to his emotions, and it’ll take a bit of prodding before he’s willing to speak up on what’s desired from him. he’s v picky when it comes to finding the “ partner of his dreams “ - but he’s def willing to throw himself into the romance of the situation, i.e. buying flowers, riding white horses, and slaying metaphorical dragons. the traditional side means that he will shower his partner with thoughtful gifts, wine and dine them in the best restaurants, and try to grant their every wish. he will take the garbage out, fix that wobbly shelf, navigate on road trips, and kill more so trap and release bugs for his partner, and most important of all he will do it all without being asked. his loyalty and keen attention to the needs and wants of his potential partner. so basically, more so willing to showcase through actions than speak on it. it’s the little things, right ??!?!?! he def cherishes not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person in mind, body, and soul.

prides himself on being able to make a mean cup of coffee, likely the worst person to watch a movie with bc he knows exactly how it’s going to end after only watching five minutes of it, he has a godawful sense of direction, will walk in circles for fifteen minutes before even raising a question about it/noticing ( but he refuses to acknowledge it. )

his house, car, workspace, junk drawer, closet….you name it - it’s organized, practically sparkling. often times arranged by color, and / or style. nothing is ever out of place, and if it is - there’s trouble brewing. but, more than anything, if he’s visiting somebody’s place and it’s messy, he will spend a solid thirty minutes picking everything up before doing whatever it is that was intended.

likes : reading, flowers, handwritten notes/letters, deep cleaning, baking, working on his pottery, watching the history channel and true crime docs and playing / watching hockey !!

dislikes : artichoke, clutter, sandals ( fkjgh ), unrealistic plotlines in movies &+ burnt coffee.

habits : likely has a severe caffeine addiction, although he’s now normalized having six cups of coffee throughout his day. he’s an early riser, no matter how little the amount of sleep he’s received, he’s always the first to rise - for his early morning runs !!

strengths: creative, insightful, inspiring, convincing, determined and passionate, decisive, altruistic, intuitive !!

weaknesses: sensitive, extremely private, perfectionist, low-key always needs to have a cause / purpose, can burn out easily !!

overall : etienne truly strives to be kind, and genuinely wants for everyone to get along. treat people with kindness and the like. he has the best of intentions, but often times that can get a bit muddled with the way he goes about things due to his bit of chaotic energy / as well as his often points of getting lost in his thoughts. he won’t realize he’s been quiet for the last three hours unless it’s mentioned to him. he will do anything to lighten a dark mood, and will sacrifice / throw himself under the bus if its needed. however, he also is the type to cause the dark mood depending on the day. wahoo! his more reckless antics increase when he’s feeling a bit emotional !! but he’ll likely try and convince somebody to propose the idea so it’s not on him.

𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

he lives with sebastian !! with his commuting to nyc for the hockey season, he wanted somebody to be able to take care of his house / garden and what not, and thus, seb arrived.

he’s v into making ceramics, cups / bowls / vases / etc !! what began as a fun hobby to distract himself in the offseason became something that he truly enjoys. ( laughing about that scene in ghost BUT DKJFNG OKAY ) although he’s pretty low-key about it, you can catch him at the farmers market selling his creations !! some pictures of his work can be found on his pinterest board !!

he is a vegetarian ! he has been since his freshman year of high school and has no plans on eating seafood/meat ever again.

he loves fancy wine ~ he’s cultured.

he can play the drums !!

he collects vintage matchbooks and the stickers off of various fruits ( he puts them in a little notebook - can be found on his bookshelf ).

saves handwritten notes and letters from pals.

he loves to garden !!!! he has a specified rose shearing hat.

HE WANTS TO JOIN A BOOKCLUB PLEASE !!!!!!!! or at least have some casual moments of silence with another reading. plz and tysm.

to make things a bit simple, he has all of harry’s tattoos !! might add more along the way !! stay tuned, folks !!

𝖜𝖆𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘

i am so up for anything!! please accept this ramble of ideas thrown below. if you have any other ideas, lmk !!!! <3333 :’-) down to start from scratch and PLOT PLOT PLOT !

( 2 / 2 ) - BFFZ : the z for an added emphasis dkfjgnd. somebody who likely has a key to etienne’s house, they can enjoy one anothers company as well as the bouts of comfortable silence. you know how best friends are but kdjfngd still !! whether they are likeminded or polar opposites that just flow ~~ down for anything !! even a trio of sorts ?!

( 1 / 1 ) - RIDE OR DIE / CHAOTIC COMPANION : it would be wrong to say one is the more likely the bad influence over the other, although etienne may just be. these two find themselves bounding into, well hell, ( i guess??? ) together. playing on one anothers impulsiveness and if one ends up in the back of a police car, the other is handcuffed to them. and yet despite the length of their potential injuries, they find themselves thinking of something crazier to subject them to the next time around.

( 1 / 1 ) - GUARDIAN ANGEL / GOOD INFLUENCE : with etienne being a bit chaotic in nature, he needs somebody that is likely going to steer him clear from all the ideas that’ll bring him to the brink of disaster. he’s impulsive and in that desperate attempt to feel again, he’s very likely to bring a bit of mayhem upon himself. so while they may be worrying and attempting to talk his ideas down, he’s trying to get them to go along with his plan. it may be rare that he actually takes their advice, but when he does it seems to be for the best.

( 1 / 1 ) - PARTY FRIEND : these two know how to have a good time together. despite the amount of alcohol they are throwing back and the shenanigans they find themselves in as a result, this is a time where they also find themselves confiding in one another. if you look at their camera rolls, it’s likely they have tons of embarrassing and unflattering videos and pics of one another, in between their sob-worthy confessionals and venting/rants. these two trust one another, and although they love getting wreckT together, they find themselves discussing very raw and personal details. likely the only person etienne confides in, simply bc he’s completely plastered.

( 1 / 1 ) - SIBLING-LIKE RELATIONSHIP : these two have a love/hate relationship, very sibling like filled with pranks, competition, teasing and playful banter. however, when it comes down to it they have so much love and respect for one another. they know that no matter what happens they will always have one anothers back and be supportive of the other. truly a pure content filled relationship.

okay quick mention, ENEMY PLOTS ?!?!?!?!?!? i would live for one. i can’t imagine etienne being hardcore nasty, but i’d like to see whatever version comes out for this. so let’s get it djfngjakdfg maybe they just hold different viewpoints on the world and what not and clash, anything really !!! v open !!

( 1 / 1 ) - MENTOR - etienne needs a bit of structured or unstructured guidance, all depending on what their deemed mentor is wanting to impart on him, a bit of wisdom or slight chaos. kdjfgn he’ll take anything !!

RANDOM LITTLE IDEAS : maybe they’ve heard of one another in town, but haven’t quite met yet! or maybe they see each other around all the time, but have yet to introduce themselves to one another but low-key maybe in some online forum for the town together ?! who knows some fun things kdjnfg i AM OPEN !

ooh maybe a slowburn of sorts ?! something spicy to wreck HIS and my life with. dkfjgn we can base this off of chemistry !!! :’-)

#( & ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ . )#westmereintro

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