#and i didnt have time to eat breakfast or dinner

[elegantcherryblossomsheep]

not having the bestest of days but realising how far ive come.

my fam are going away but they're not too worried about leaving me home alone. tough day at work but i spoke to my coworkers about it (those kids are, apparently, just tricky). home alone but i ate and didn't compensate. no one around but i didn't exceed my exercise limit. self destructive urges but i stayed clean. bored but i read instead of scrolling. spent a while in bed but i got up. lonely but i reached out and am calling a friend soon.

idk it sounds so small but today i was getting so worried that my life was just gonna revert back to how it was before uni. suddenly i notice that its so drastically different even if the circumstances are similar.

[sunkistjello]

I just got my copy of the book of bill and I feel like I'm 14 again. Barely started reading and I'm already staring at thisisnotawebsitedotcom. I cannot wait to find what to enter in here. I love PUZZLES. I love GRAVITY FALLS. I'm borrowing Stanley's crowbar to hit the bill statue

[seariii]

Pretty people, prolonged fasting isn't good for you

[pro-crastinate17]

me when. did i eat today?

[localdorkincombatboots]

Losing a family member or a partner is already literally one of the worst parts of life we have to go through but being the person(s) that have to also handle all of the legal, formal, and financial parts of it makes it so much fucking worse like rubbing salt in a wound.

Like here I know you're devastated and grieving but also you need to fill out assloads of paperwork and get things set up immediately and figure out how to pay at the very cheapest $1k for a cremation without even being able to give the person you loved a proper funeral because it costs thousands of dollars more, and having to call Medicare and all the other govt. places to report her death and so fucking much that has to be handled.

Honestly everyone needs to find a way to teach themself at least the basics of everything that has to be handled after death because your family or partner could be perfectly fine one day and then all of a sudden an accident happens like a fall or wreck and it could all fall on you to handle every single thing.

And not a single part of the process is easy which only makes what is already one of the hardest things to go through in life exponentially worse.

And, death is so extremely expensive. Literally the cheapest possible cremation we can find is $995 and that's no funeral or anything just straight to ashes in a box.

You don't want to be struck with such a tragedy and have zero knowledge of what will become your responsibility to handle and pay for.

I know it's awful to even think about your loved ones dying but not knowing what to do when it happens, because death is the one thing that happens to us all and it can happen at literally any time, will only make everything worse and harder for you.

If you know you will be responsible for handling someone's affairs after death, take the time to actually sit down and discuss how they would want you to handle it and seriously consider looking into some kind of life insurance, even if it's not for much, because creation and funeral services require payment upfront and this isn't something that can be put off until you can afford it. Wether or not they had a life insurance policy could be the thing that could completely fuck you financially especially if you were already struggling.

[foxcassius]

okay so i put the cash i have left in japan in front of me and stared at it and i think i will be okay so long as sending my suitcases does not cost MORE than ¥12,000. i have to put ¥10,000 back in my bank account for fucking docomo, i need another ¥10,000 to pay for trains to the goddamn airport because transportation in japan is not anywhere near as cheap as the internet would lead you to believe, then the ¥12,000 for having the suitcases taken to my airbnb and i'll have ¥5,000 left to. eat at all until i leave the country. and when i check my second bag i will simply have to use my american debit card bc thats All i have here 👍

[diah-the-demon]

Just realised i never had anything to eat today

[writingoddess1125]

The Jessica Rabbit Effect (Shorts)

Buggy Headcanon+story. Buggy x Reader

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This is a series of random thoughts from the Jessica Rabbit Series

Buggy likes to be the little spoon at times, so if he's had a bad day will cuddle against his darling wife and let her take care of him.

You often have to do Buggy's hair. Since its a wild mess at the best of times when he returns from see its a bit of a ritual for him to shower, get into his favorite pants and sit between your thighs as you brush out his hair.

Has bitten your Thigh- earning a playful smack of the comb

Sometimes he will sing for you- He actually has a lovely singing voice but you'll be the only one to hear it.

Surprisngly decent at cooking- Hes no chef but sure as hell can make one hell of a breakfast sandwich.

YOU are the secret Perv of the relationship, Most would assume its Buggy but its actually You.

You had been stalking your prey for the last 5 minutes, Buggy was currently going through some crates he had kept in the closet- saying something about a old hat of sorts. It was the perfect angle however-

However he was unaware of his wife slowly stepping forwards him as he bent over once more to dig deeper in the box-

Closer...

Maybe right overrr..

Buggy Yelled suddenly as he felt fingers dig into the flesh of his ass as he turned and heard you cackle and quickly dash away as he gives chase.

He often returns from his sailing with gifts of whatever you like. Jewlery? More Sewing stuff? Books? Whatever you want he will snag for you.

You two secretly read raunchy novels together, Sometimes you will send him a book while he is away and he will read it at night before bed. Before sending one of his own-

Often resulting in the two of you speaking about the books in depth when together good or bad-

Buggy Takes care of you since you are more likely to burn out-

EXTRA! (Short Story)

You'd been hard at work, it seemed your business had been really taking off with now your two most demanding customers Sir Mihawk and Sir Crocodile. Who seemed to not only be picky about their fabrics but also seemed to damage their clothes constantly! You'd been busy to say the least.

Right now was no exception, You were standing in the Livingroom of yur home adding a few final buttons to a coat of Sir Crocodile, Letting your mind wonder as you worked tirelessly to have it completed before the morning-

As you worked you felt a hand touch your waist, giving a loud shrill yell as you spun around and swung-

"OW! What the hell!?" Your husbands voice sounded as you managed to whack his nose with a open palm. Buggy seemed to have just sailed in, still in his hat and coat and now rubbing his now sore nose with a frown-

"Im so sorry darling! I didnt realize it was you here let me get a pack for your nose-" You started, still coming down from the fright your husband had given you and went to flutter away to get a ice pack, However Buggy stopped you and pulled you close. Examming your face closely and frowning.

"Forget it- What are you doing up so late anyway? You should still be asleep.. You look tired-"

He grumbled, catching your look of confusion.

"Early? Its only- Um" You look to the large clock and blink in surprise at seeing the time. 1:37am!?

"O-Oh i guess I lost track of time an-"

"Did you eat dinner!?" Buggy cut you off again seeing your little work table and spotting only half finished tea and almost a finished pastry, most likely from the morning before- You bit your lip in embarrassment not even having the voice to say anything at being caught.

With a etched frown Buggy suddenly hoisted you up to his shoulder causing a loud yelp to leave you.

"Buggy!" You yell as you are carried like a sack to your shared master bedroom, red faced from the action.

"Buggy I still have to finish Crocodiles Coat an- EEP!"

A full palmed smack hit your behind from, Buggy- Cutting off your tirade as you felt your brain short circuit for a moment. Buggy walked into the master bathroom and set you on the counter, grumbling to himself as he started up a bath and went to your bedroom to start grabbing clothes.

"Buggy Boo-"

You started again but his hand floated to you and placed a finger to your lips.

"Id start undressing if I were you! Cause If I do it I may get handsy!"

Buggy called out from the bedroom as he grabbed more clothes. His free floating hand making a grabbing motion to your chest as if to give warning- You couldn't help but let a laugh out at this as you pushed his hand away playfully and slid off the countertop and getting undressed.

Setting your clothes in the hamper as Buggy came back in the bathroom with fresh PJs and already in his boxers only. He eyes looking over your figure in desire, Making you blush of course. Setting the clothes down Buggy removed his Boxers with dramatic flare of course and climbed in the water first, turning it off in the process as his other hand detached and guided you in with care. You leaning back against Buggy's chest and sighing in delight at the hot water. The stress already melting away as the two of you sat and soaked.

After a little while the two of you began to wash up, Buggy putting your hair up as the comforting silence and occasional splash of water from rinsing could be heard.

After the two of you smelled like sweet apple soap and the hot water had cooled to warm the both of you got out. Buggy taking the time to dry you off with a big fluffy towel while you braided his hair so it wouldn't tangle.

Getting dressed you walked into the bedroom and plopped onto the bed, starting to finally feel tired as Buggy laid next to you. His hands however leaving the room-

"Better?" Buggy asked as he looked at you, you leaning over and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

"Much, Thank you darling" You smile, just to glance over and see his hands returning with a series of items half hazard. A box of crackers, some cured meat, a few apples and some random half eaten cheese blocks. Paired with a knife of course you assume from his belt.

"Dinner of champions!" Buggy boasted, cracking open the wine bottle and handing it to you, rolling your eyes playfully as you took a sip.

The two of you seated on your marital bed, drinking straight from a wine bottle and eating the simple meal, chatting away about random topics.

"So you think the treasure is further south?" You ask, Buggy nodding as he took another bit of cheese and crackers in his mouth as he spoke with his mouth full cutting some meat for you and passing it over. "I 'Hink Cap Jo'n hit it und'er som' seri's of i'slands sout-" (I think Capt John hid it under some series of islands south).

"A Yellow VELVET Shirt!?" Buggy said dramatically making you laugh as you took some apple into your mouth and nodded. Buggy face scrunching up in disgust. "Come On, I'm a clown and I think that's tacky! Even for Crocodile!" You start to laugh as buggy passes the now half empty bottle to you.

Laughter and Chatter filled the bedroom till around 3am, when Buggy set the leftovers of the impromptu meal on the nightstand, the empty wine bottle on the floor and cuddled you close. Pressing you against his neck as you two felt exhaustion take you.

"Your not working for the next few days.. Gonna Burn Out-" Buggy mumbled as he felt your breath even out and cuddle closer to him. You nod "Fine.. But same goes to you" You yawn, Buggy patting your arm in agreement.

"Deal.. Now sleep" He grumbled closing his eyes.

"I love you Bugs"

"I love you More.."

[i-cant-sing]

Ok. Ok. HEAR ME OUT. Miguel hanging out with reader (shes chained to the chair) and feeding her (shoving food down her throat) bc she mentioned she hadn't eaten anything while Miguel was out handling business (beating up a child)

Ommg yess but like imagine reader being a spider person and unbeknownst to her, Miguel has grown really fond of her, seeing her as his own daughter and so he... dotes on you. Look, his family loss is still fresh, so he has this abundance of platonic love that he just needs to pour and you are luckily (or not) that person.

And papa Miguel is like trying so hard not to show that he cares about your well being, but HE DOES and he's always worried about you and he just wants to pull u out of the field and tell u its too dangerous for u to be spiderman, but he doesn't wanna say it because then he'll have to explain his concern for u and I've already told u guys that he's an emotionally crippled father who cant say "I love you" but their actions always scream out the words.

So, he thinks its best to just take care of you as best as he can without arousing suspicion from you or pulling u out of the field (cause he knows u love being a hero). He makes you food(mostly mexican because everything else doesn't have enough spice and it doesnt matter if u cant handle spice, you will LEARN to), okay? I mean good, homecooked meals, 3 times a day and he expects you to eat breakfast and dinner(ofcourse u have a curfew) with him. But lunches? well, since you're always on missions during lunch time, he packs u up some food for u to take and he always checks your bento box (ALSO SPIDERMAN THEMED OBV) but perhaps this one day, you forgot to or didnt want to take your lunch along (a very tasty burrito) and when Miguel sees your lunch in his kitchen, he is LOSING it all. My man here is making himself go crazy(ier) by overthinking the worst possible scenarios (because this is unusual behavior in his textbook) and he sends a sort of AMBER alert on your ass because you're not answering his calls/texts(cause ur busy fighting bad guys) and Miguel just sends the ENTIRE spider society to find where you are and bring you home ASAP. Obv the spider society follows his orders to bring you because he's boss man and he probably has some important reason to drag ur ass home and not because papa's heart cant handle that his baby missed lunch???

Omg can you imagine reader finally finishing tying up the bad guys and now stops by a pizza place to grab a slice and girl looks outside to see 100 spidermans swinging around, all coming her way. These guys all shoot enough webs until you were practically cocooned in them and perfectly immobilised, and then they all open up the portal to deliver u to Miguel.

And Miguel just shoos them all away before he begins to free u from the webs and asks where u were, what happened, did the bad guys hurt u, were u kidnapped.

"Yeah-" you pulled the webs out of your hair. "-by your men!" And Miguel explains that he sent them after you because he thought something bad happened to u.

"Why would you think that?"you inquired.

Because you forgot your lunch at home. No, he cant say that.

"I- my spider senses were telling me to. I guess they were wrong." Now before you could ask more questions, he changes the topic. "Anyways, you must be hungry. Lets eat lunch-"

"No, I actually ate a slice of pizza before I was brought here-" you start but Miguel glares at you as he pulls out a dish of enchiladas from the oven, placing it in front of you.

"You will eat. You're hungry."

"I'm actually not. Like I was saying-" but he glares at you again, piling up your plate with enchilidas.

"I wasn't asking, mija." He hands you the utensils, red eyes piercing you. "You are hungry, and you will eat. Now."

[mysicklove]

im so normal about gojo, the strongest sorcerer of his time and his wife who's not a sorcerer and works as a ceo of a company that absolutely dominates him on a daily basis.

like yea, gojos over 6 feet tall and he could easily take your life away whenever BUT you're his mommy darling and he couldn't even bring himself to do anything without your approval.

gojo malewife agenda also; busy man that makes breakfast for his ceo wife in the morning, makes her coffee and gets her bag and laptop ready so she doesn't have to lift a finger. you reward him with a pat on the head and a firm kiss before you're out the door and his dick is hard IMMEDIATELY.

you get back home and he's already a the door, kneels to help your heels off and hang your coat in the closet. guides you to the kitchen where dinner is ready, and he's staring at you like 😇 very proud of himself cuz he's been the best boy.

anyway. gojo is the cutest thing I've ever SEEN

i LOVEEEEE this idea oh my.

hes like an overgrown puppy about it too. you have to praise every single detail about his work or else he gets all pouty and lets out the most dramatic sighs ever. and every day when he hears the, "aw satoru, you didnt have to do all this for me. youre so sweet." he gets all giddy and declares that he is the best husband out there.

but you do have a habit of teasing him, grabbing the back of his hair and pressing your mouth to his. he always ends up pinning you to a wall, only thinking, are you staying home? please stay home. dont go, its not worth it. and then you pull away as if nothing was amiss, leaving him with swollen lips and ruffled hair from where you affectionately ruffled his hair. the door shuts and he groans to himself, knowing that he has to jerk off now because of you.

but when you get home he is back at your heels, attending to your every need and staring at you while you eat his (frozen, pre-made) dinner that he just pulled out of the oven. and then he goes off on a tangent on how he cleaned the house, washed the sheets, folded the laundry, and you make sure to praise him accordlingly. but it is gojo, and even if the praise makes his cheeks flush, he was never just satisified with that. so he ends off his little monologue with a, "i do believe earth shattering sex would totally show how greatful you are of your adoring, hard working husband."

[m1sa-w1sa]

Hii! I dont remember if I asked this before but I saw the new post that says that you are about harbingers again so Imma put my request. Sorry if I requested this before, if I did, please just ignore it. Anyways, here is my request:may I pretty please with cherry on top get Arlecchino, Scaramouche and Childe with a darling that is on hunger strike? (Bacically refuses to eat unless freed)

Ty 4 reading my request!

(Okie dokie!! Sorry if this took a little long to get out, i was researching a bit on it)

EAT ALREADY!!! Fluff, a bit of ooc, crack

Arlecchino

•Shes slightly confused, why arent you eating anything? What is this for? She tries to get you to eat, but again you said no, so she doesnt push it on you •After a few days without eating then she is going to take action, ok buddy.. shes actually wondering what are you doing this for, be freed from WHAT who is doing this? •She would get you your favorite food, putting it in front of you, waiting for you to eat it, if not shes shoving it down your throat YOU AINT GONNA STARVE ON HER WATCH ‘ You have to eat, Im not leaving until you do ‘

Scaramouche

•At first he wouldnt care that much, leaving you be, but he is slightly worried if he doesnt show it •Like Arlecchino, he doesnt know WHY your doing this, what do you need to be freed from? A contract? Debt? Getting hunted down? •If you dont eat in a day or 2 he WILL sit you down and make you eat if you dont then hes going to MAKE you eat ‘Your still a stupid mortal, you need food, Im not going to lose you… ‘

Childe/Tartaglia

•This mf aint wasting ANY TIME you didnt eat breakfast? Hes nagging to you about it, and trying to drag you back into the kitchen, no lunch?! Following you around flicking your head, no dinner?? Hes scolding you about the IMPORTANCE of eating •This man will find any way to make you eat, tickling you until you cant breath, putting ice cubes on your back, ANYTHING he aint letting you go on with this for me than 2 or 3 days ‘ Cmon babe! You gotta eat! Im not taking no as a answer.. ‘ (FINNNIIISSSHHHEDDDDD! Im rlly happy to write for the harbingers again!!!)

[cloudaxolotl07]

Here are the official looks for the Bishops in my Beyond au!

They all have the golden skull necklaces but they are just hidden under layers of fabric COUGH I DIDNT JUST FORGET THEM ON ACCIDENT-

Info on each character below!

Shamura

Shamura is the eldest of the 5 siblings and is the Historian and Teacher for the Cult. Shamura is a calm and kind spirit, though if you annoythem enough, they’ll start to disent a little, causing ichor to pour from their wounded head. They can get slight brain fog pretty often during the day but they somehow appear on time to events or remember things when the memory returns after a while. Although Shamura was the ex bishop of War, they are quite the tactical thinker and fighter; quick on their feet and always knows how to take their enemies down when necessary. They assist with educating the younger members of the cult and is quite intelligent in many subjects even if they have brain damage from long ago. They mainly on their free time or when not with any of the kids, they tend to hide in the library, reading in silence.

Kallamar

Kallamar is the second oldest out of the 5 siblings and is the Chief Medical officer in the Cult. Kallamar likes to act prideful and has a bit of an ego, though truly he is a coward at heart. He has sensitive hearing due to the damage inflicted from Narinder, so loud noises can cause pain to him. Being the ex bishop of pestilence, he has the vast knowledge in medicine and medical practice, with that knowledge were they given the job to look after the health of the followers in the Cult. He loves to collect anything he deems beautiful and is sparkling; always wearing some form of jewelry on him wherever he goes on the cult grounds.

Heket

Heket is the second youngest out of the 5 siblings and is the Cult’s Chief Guard. Heket is quiet and stoic, but caring when it comes to her siblings and the followers of the cult. People, especially children tend to get intimidated when first meeting her, but they easily warm up when eating her delicious food she prepares during breakfast, lunch and dinner. She isn’t able to speak all that well and speaking up never goes well for her as she easily gets ichor filling her mouth to the point of dirtying her lungs, causing coughing fits from time to time. Her siblings however can easily understand what she tries to say when reading her body language, facial expressions or listening for her quiet mumbling; except Leshy for most of the time.

Leshy

Leshy is the youngest of the 5 siblings and is the Chief Farmer for the Cult. Leshy is hot-tempered and chaotic in nature and easily can get embarrassed or offended by small things either when people make fun of him or question his looks and/or intellect. Leshy is completely blind when using his eyes, but he soon made a friend who helps him get around far distances in the Cult. Growing up mainly in the Darkwood, he knows plenty about taking care and nurturing plant life, always knowing what each plant in the cult farms needs to grow to their fullest potential. He relies on his siblings to also help him with either hiding or getting from one place to another when Collie can’t. A small thing he appreciates though is on warm and sunny days, he likes to bathe in the sun, feeling the warmth on his body. A small detail about Leshy is when he expresses heavy emotions or feelings, flowers of different kinds tend to sprout from his body depending on how he’s feeling at the time, mainly they blossom on his head.

[uhitsum]

youve probably answered this question before, but just how did you do it? im at about 120 now (but very short), i can only dream of reaching 200. Whats the secret (is there one?)

I don't think there is much of a secret, I can't tell you any new hack for gaining that you've never heard before. But I'll gladly share how I did it :)

I started at 120lbs too, which was a bit underweight on my 5'8" frame 😅 I didnt only gain for the kink, but because I felt genuinely unhappy in my body and I wanted to change it. Here's a rough outline of the pace of my gains:

Sept 2022: 120lbs

Jan 2023: 155lbs

June 2023: 180lbs (plateau until October)

Jan 2024: 200lbs (starting this blog shortly after turning 18)

September 2024: 220lbs (I havent stepped on a scale this month, but I know I hit 220 lol. also yay, 2 years of gaining 🥳)

From Sept 2022 to Jan 2023 was probably the most work I've put into gaining, since i had to rewire the metabolism that had kept me skinny all my life. I don't believe in tricks and hacks in fattening up (not that I could get much for myself, I was 16 and couldn't drive) so I did it the old fashioned way. I altered my meal schedule in this sort of way:

7am Breakfast

NEW 10am Brunch snacks (often a Peanut Butter Smoothie)

12pm Lunch snacks

NEW 3pm actual Lunch (usually followed by a food coma)

6pm Dinner

NEW 9pm 2nd Dinner

I probably wasn't hitting all of these meal times every day, but adding more opportunities for me to get my hands on food throughout the day meant i was almost always thinking of my next meal 😅

Besides just eating more often, another area I worked on was eating more at each meal. I would push myself to go back for seconds, or to pair more with whatever I ate at each meal. I adopted a "what could I add" mentality, where I would never eat one thing alone. My favorite example was for breakfast: before, I'd eat a breakfast sandwich, which is a respectable small meal at ~400 calories. When I was in my "gaining prime," I would add a second sandwich, and put tater tots in the air fryer, adding up to 1000+ calories for just a little more work.

While I know this won't be the glamorous answer many people hope for, it's good honest work with results hard to ignore. After you force yourself to overeat for long enough, it becomes impossible to go back to the small and infrequent meals of before — your own appetite is enough to keep up your gaining momentum 🤭

From Sept 2022 to Jan 2023 was when I was working my gut hard to adhere to the schedules, but I loosened up once I upsized my wardrobe a second time and could feel the softness creeping in. My gainer's appetite kept me cruizing until June, gaining an average of 6lbs a month (🥵) when I started work (at a Frozen Custard shop, no less) which kept me on my feet late at night and made me plateau.

It wasn't until October that I would start pushing myself again, on one Very Horny week where I had the house to myself. I binged every single day, including my first experience drinking melted ice cream (cut with Heavy Cream) 😵‍💫 which led into a plateau break as I gained 20lbs in 3 months once again.

2024, despite me making this blog, has been predominantly a cruising year. I started at 200lbs, bigger than I had ever expected to get when I first started, so I mainly just eat a lot when I want to, and don't when I don't. Now that I'm in college, both stress eating and a very loving boyfriend join the mix, so we'll wait and see what these next few years have in store for my waistline 😉

So, that's the long and short of it! If you're looking to gain, I think you have to push yourself, but make sure you're only doing so in ways you can enjoy. Routine is EVERYTHING, with the end goal that you shouldn't have to make conscious decisions to overeat; it should just be a fact of life 😌 I wouldn't personally recommend relying on drinks to fatten up from the very beginning, since those can be easy to get sick of, but they can be valuable tools for plateau breaking in combination with an otherwise gourmand mindset.

Thanks for the ask! And to anyone brave enough to make it through to the end, thank you for reading! I love telling my gainer story, because I like to put it into a more realistic framework than many of the hot and horny stories out there are able to do. As thanks, here's a belly pic just for you! Dont mind the bruises, we just had a little fun yesterday :3

[cheeseboi420]

Of A Feather - Chapter One Preview

A/N: hi everybody!!! I am super duper stoked to present u all with the first 2k words of Of A Feather, aka the "what if Jason's bio mom didnt SUCK" fic. Im hoping to have the full chapter ready for publishing in the next week or two! Big thanks to everyone who's talked to me abt this fic so far, and an ESPECIALLY big thanks to @jayladfanpage for basically being my jaybin encyclopedia while i work my way through this fic!!! This warning will be more applicable in future chapters but it should be noted that this fic is NOT canon compliant and does significantly change/recontextualize a couple things about Jason's background, but you the audience get to find out about all that in real time alongside Jason lmao!! Anyways, without further adieu, please enjoy this preview ❤️

TW: mentions of drug use, teen pregnancy, allusions to underage sex

You expect this evening to play out like the one before it. And the one before that. And the one before that. Your routine hasn't changed in the last 13 years. Why should it? It serves you well enough, keeps you alive and… Well, that's about all it does for you. Not that you're looking for more! For the most part, you are… content, maybe isn't the correct word. Complacent fits a little better, but still isn't wholly accurate. You're content in the knowledge that your boy is safe and loved, somewhere far away from the trouble that chases you. You're complacent in your own quiet misery. The longing and loneliness had been a bitter pill to swallow those first few years of running, but after this long you've learned not to complain. God knows no one would listen if you did.

You've got a shitty box pizza in the oven. This will be your dinner, tomorrow's breakfast, and tomorrow's dinner. You won't particularly enjoy any of the meals, but they'll sustain you well enough. These days, food brings you little, if any joy. Meal times are a chore to slog through before the distraction that work brings or the sweet embrace of sleep. You look forward to, more than anything, going to bed. Not because you're tired (though there is a bone deep weariness that permeates- that no amount of rest could ever fix) but because bed means sleep, and sleep means dreams, and dreams mean a chance to hold your baby again.

You don't dream of Jason every night, but every morning, you wake thinking of him. Is he still asleep right now? Having breakfast? Is he eating well? Is he happy? Is he happy? Is he happy?

By the time you push your way through breakfast most mornings the cacophony of thoughts revolving around your son quiets to a dull roar in the back of your mind. It's better that way, you think. If you thought about him as much as your mind seemed to want you to, you'd never get anything done.

Life carries on, you suppose. However dreary and dull that life may be.

At one time you'd found the whole thing very exciting- though not in a particularly enjoyable way. The adrenaline rush has worn off over the years, no longer do you feel as though death is nipping at your heels. The paranoia never fades though. Even if your doom does not cast a shadow over you, you're always looking over your shoulder, always ready to bolt at the first sign of trouble.

You keep a bag packed and ready in the closet by the front door for when you have to leave this place, too. Though, you think it's buried under a winter jacket and your spare blankets. You really ought to dig it out, keep it easily accessible. You should do that but… it's been a long day. You want to eat your shitty pizza, lay down on your futon, and let the sound of tv static fill your studio apartment, lulling you to sleep.

You're getting too comfortable here, you think. You've lived in Michigan for nearly a year now. It is simultaneously entirely too close to and entirely too far from Gotham. The apartment itself was a godsend after spending most of your time sleeping in cars, tents, whatever unfortunate business was willing to employ you, anywhere you could, really- sure it has bugs, and the windows don't close all the way, and you're fairly certain it'll only take one more bad winter storm for the place to come crumbling down, but rent is dirt cheap, and the slumlord you rent from didn't ask for any ID when you signed your ‘lease.’ You're fairly certain that thing's not legally binding anyways- it was written on a cocktail napkin for Christ's sake. That didn't stop you from using a fake name when signing it. You can never be too careful.

You haven't seen your landlord since you moved in anyways. You don't ask for maintenance when things break, you fix them yourself or just learn to live with them broken. You deliver your rent by slipping a cash stuffed envelope with your name (your fake name, the one you signed your lease with, the one you use at work, the one you'd use at coffee shops if you ever went to any) on it through the slot in the office door. You do your best to be invisible. You don't cause problems, and you don't go out of your way to fix them for others. You make no friends or enemies. You've left no impact on the many places you've been, the cities you've drifted through.

The only evidence you've gone anywhere at all in your life is a stack of postcards, held together with a worn rubber band, sitting at the bottom of your go-bag. The only evidence of a life lived before that is in a similarly bound stack of polaroids, held together with a too-small paperclip. Every now and then, you'll buy a bottle of cheap wine to chug as you pour over the old photographs. Only when you leave for a new city do you dare to touch the stack of unsent postcards.

You can't bear to look at the photos too often, a painful reminder of your own failings. A reminder of the stupid, reckless little girl you'd been and the shell of a woman you'd become in the aftermath.

Girls like you'd been were a dime a dozen in Crime Alley. Really, you weren't even a particularly special or severe case. Sure, you did drugs, but you weren't on crack. You were just a bit of a stoner! Sure you'd been sixteen and pregnant, without the slightest idea which of your former paramours had knocked you up- but it was all above board, really! None of those men had forced you to do anything. In fact, you sought them out of your own volition for all sorts of reasons. Attention, cheap affection, cheaper drugs, something to do, somewhere to go when the home you'd once shared with your father and brother had become too stifling to bear.

It's all your own fault, really.

At least that's what you keep telling yourself.

It's easier to swallow than the alternative: that you were a vulnerable and unloved thing, eating from any hand that would feed you, until the hand that feeds decides to beat.

This, you think, is why you shouldn't think too hard about the past. It doesn't do you any good to dwell on it.

You force yourself to focus on the present, on the here and now. The scratchy polyester blend of the futon cushions, the scent of cheap cheese melting in the oven, the distant sound of sirens, and howling wind outside your apartment. There's no sense in thinking about Gotham now, not when you're so far from it.

You sit up on the futon, no longer content to lounge and let your mind wander. Instead you task yourself with flipping through channels on TV, seeking something mind numbing enough to distract you from your unusually strong urge to reminisce.

The Wonder Years? No, you don't want to watch anything about a family.

Alf? No, that puppet creeps you out.

Cops? Fuck that.

You're about to resign yourself to another night of murmuring the (mostly incorrect) answers to Jeopardy questions at your tv, when you're startled by a knock at your door.

A… knock… at your door.

No one ever knocks on your door. You don't get mail, you don't have friends, if your landlord wanted something, you're willing to bet the greasy bastard wouldn't be willing to haul himself all the way up to the fifth floor at nearly 10 PM.

Oh God… Did… Did he find you? Is this it? Are you going to die in the upper peninsula of Michigan, of all places?!

No, no. You have to stay calm. This could be anything. It's just a knock at the door. It could be anyone!

Oh lord, it could be anyone.

You keep the tv on, hoping that the sound of Alex Trebek grilling folks on useless trivia will cover your footsteps as you creep towards your front door. You hold your breath as you press yourself against it, double checking that all three of your locks are secure before you risk a glance out the peephole.

When you look out into the hall you're surprised, and frankly a bit confused by the sight before you. Standing at your door is a boy, dark haired and bright eyed. He stands straight but not particularly tall- he can't be more than five feet. He's glancing around the hall, rocking back and forth on his heels. He's wearing a red sweatshirt and jeans, with a backpack slung over one shoulder. Despite his small stature he holds an air of determination that makes you think he must feel quite old for his age- you get that, you were the same way in your own youth. A chip too big for your shoulder.

You're so focused on studying him that it startles you when he leans forward to knock again. You jolt, accidentally kicking the door (with your bare feet too, damn does that hurt your poor toes) and responding to his knock-knock-knock with a solid knock of your own.

“Hello?” The boy calls. “Anybody home?”

“I don't have any money!” You call back, cursing yourself for the shake in your voice. You should not be this rattled by a random adolescent on your doorstep. “So, if you're selling popcorn, or cookies, or whatever, you should try next door.”

The boy rolls his eyes.

“I'm not a boy scout!” He says. “I'm looking for-”

And then the shoe drops; he says your name. Your full name. Not your fake name, that you use at work, and on envelopes, and in hypothetical coffee shops. Your real name.

It takes every bit of emotional regulation you can muster not to spiral into a full blown panic right then and there because good God, did He send a child to finish you off? The cruel irony is not lost on you. Come to think of it, this boy on your doorstep does bear an uncanny resemblance to-

“My name is Jason Todd,” the boy continues. “And uh… well, I might be your son?”

He could be lying, the logical part of your brain insists. This could be a ploy to get you to open the door, don't open the door! But your hands are moving on their own, shakey as they may be. The first lock twists unlocked with ease, the second takes a fair bit more of your fine motor function, and by the time your shaking hands reach up to unhook the chain on the door, you're struggling to see through unshed tears. You attempt once, twice, three fucking times to get your hands to cooperate and unlatch the damn chain.

Fuck it.

You open the door, yanking it inwards, towards yourself as hard as you can. It should probably unnerve you that the flimsy chain breaks at the first sign of real resistance, but that's not what's important right now.

What's important is the boy standing before you- your boy. Your Jason.

He looks as surprised as you feel, his eyes flitting between the broken chain, and you.

For a long moment the only thing you can do is look at him, reacquaint yourself with the sight of him. Of course, you know that he did not stay frozen in time, the way your memory of him is. It's been many years since you've held that babbling toddler. But knowing and seeing are two different things.

He's small for his age, is your first thought. Your own fault, you're certain. Between a premature delivery and your own malnourishment during that first trimester, it's a miracle he'd survived in the first place. Small, but well fed. His cheeks are full and flushed. Despite his size, he seems healthy. Good. That means Will's been feeding him. Hopefully, it means they got the hell out of The Alley, into a nicer neighborhood.

His hair isn't as curly as you'd pictured it- too short in most places to hold a curl, save for his bangs, which seem to almost form the shape of a heart over his forehead.

“Jason?” You can barely manage to say his name through the lump in your throat. You find yourself suddenly struggling to focus your gaze on him, the haze of tears welling up in your eyes makes it difficult to see. You try to blink them away but instead they roll down your cheeks.

God, when's the last time you cried?

You reach out to him, cupping one of his cheeks in the palm of your shaking hand. He leans into the affectionate touch, and you're reminded of puppies, overeager and seeking love at every opportunity.

“Mom,” he says back to you, his tone just as reverent as your own. “Mom,” he says again, voice crackling. And then, in unison, the both of you have pulled each other into a crushing hug. You can't tell if the sound you make is a sob or a laugh. You hold onto Jason like he'll vanish into the ether if you loosen your hold for even a second, one hand clutching at the back of his sweatshirt, the other at the back of his head, petting his hair as he buries his face in your neck.

Finally, at long last, your heart is home.

SO. What do we think folks. Are you hooked? I hope youre hooked. Please be hooked. I wanna talk to people about this fic so damn bad. Please send anons or dms or literally anything. When the chapter is complete I'll be putting it up here as well as on my ao3, which I'll link to! Thanks so much for reading and i hope yall are enjoying yourselves so far! Send me an anon or a dm if you'd like to be included on the taglist for this series!

TAGLIST: @leirobles

[billie-reportingbadnews2you]

Not that change you can borrow/ a Billie Eilish fanfic

Warnings: swearing, throwing glass, crying, slamming into walls

summary: ever since billie started working on her new album, she spent less and less time with you, talking to you less and less more, but smiling more as if she was happier without you, you felt you were loosing her but when you brought the subject up she brushed it off as bieng tired, but you have decided to do something about it, what is it?

You were drifting off to sleep on the couch, watching billies documentaries on Disney plus, it was around 3 am, your eyes were incredibly heavy, you had made some food for yourself and billie, you always re-assured her that dinner would be ready when she got back and you also said you would be there, as you were about to give up and sleep, you heard the front door open, you heard scooting and the low sigh of your girlfriend, you rubbed your eyes that were slightly red and felt plumpy and swollen, you went up to billie and gave her a hug "your back!" she was on the phone "Haha yea sounds great this weekend!" she hung up and met your eyes with a tired smile and hugged you back softly "hey babe" she stretched her arms wide while yawing "hey i made dinner" she stopped in her track, than continuing and grabbing a glass "oh yea thanks babe, we picked up taco bell on the way ill have it tomorrow" she said while obviously distracted by her phone pouring milk into her glass almost missing it, you smile faded, "hey is that a new shirt?" she looked up from her phone the dim light, revealing her curious face, she looked down "oh this yea, me and finneas went shopping, he got it for me awesome right?, speaking of finneas, me, him and our studio director are going out for dinner this weekend" you frowned looking at the table top and started to fiddle with your finger "b-billie what about out date?" she almost choked on her milk "shit sorry baby i completely forgot about that, next week ok?" she gave you a quick peck on the forehead before going upstairs still staring down at her phone, " night babe". you let out a sad sign and cleaned her cup and wiped down the bench, you heard billie yell for the stairs "hey babe ill make you breakfast tomorrow" this put a slight smile on your face, a couple minutes later you started to walk up the stairs completely drowned in your own tiredness, you opened the door to your bedroom, seeing billie fast asleep you get into bed and get in a cuddly position, you snuggled into her neck but she pushed your head away and turned away, you were a bit shocked so you just turned around, you didnt know why she had gotten so distant, you silently cried yourself to sleep and billie snored and but her legs on your stomach making you uncomfortable but you fell asleep soon….

You woke up to the light of your windows piercing your eyes, you thought your billie was home so you put on your dressing gown and ran down stairs 'BABE HOW ABOUT WE GO TO THE MOVIE-" you were met with a plate of food and a note "hey babe sorry i had to leave early here's some food, i wont be back until this weekend im staying at the studio, if i need anything ill text you love you" you eyes began to water you looked on the plate to see a MacDonalds burger and fries dried up and soggy, you looked in the trash can seeing the uber eats bag, you began to cry, you would've loved a call or even just a little bowl of cereal , now you had to cancel your reservations, an prepare to be alone for a week, your heart was slowly breaking, as the nights got longer and your crys got harder to control, every single message you sent billie was left on delivered, you missed her, but did she miss you?

after a whole week of loneliness, just like before at 3am you heard billie enter the house, you approached her you pushed you forward and just went straight into the room while on the phone and before you could say anything SLAM!, she closed the door, you figured she was just sleepy, but you just ended up ugly crying really badly, you used up about 3 tissue boxes, what happened to the love of your life? her face is more glower when shes not with you, is she losing feelings?

You slowly walked into your room with billie passed out again, you went onto her phone too see the hundreds of messages from you on delivered, but you went onto her and finneas messages and they were endless, i mean you get that she texts her brother alot but why not you, shes with him all day and she cant even reply to you, a pit full sorrow engulfed your lungs, silently choking on your tears, you slumped downstairs and grabbed a blanket, you figured you'd sleep on the couch, you blanket smelled like her which made you cry even harder, within no time you were passed out, you woke up the next day to see the bedroom door open you have a little bit of hope she stayed but just as you imagined she was gone, she left a note, you frantically ran towards it hoping for good, news "hey Y/n im goin out again, see ya this saturday" now you were really pissed, she called you by your name? didnt even say 'i love you' and just said bye?. she even forgot about the date you re-scheduled, you choked down your tears and watched a movie, you gave up on dinner and waiting for her, but you were triggered by the door opening, the tv screen dimming the room as you see your girlfriend, walk towards the kitchen "hey babe" you couldn't even reply, you started crying like a idiot, she walked over to you her eyes staring at her phone patting your back, "eat your food properly don't choke" you wiped your tears, broken at the fact that billie assumed you were choking becuase she was on the bloody phone all the time, you slapped it out of her hands, she looked like a clueless cat "BABE WHAT THE FU-" her eyes met your bloodshot watery eyes, "oh my god whats wrong?" you have, had it "YOU WANNA KNOW WHATS FUCKING WRONG" her face went pale, attempting to comfort you by rubbing you shoulders you swatted them aggressively, "YOU BARELY TALK TO ME, YOU DONT LOOK AT ME, YOU DONT KEEP YOUR PROMISES, DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME" her frightened face turned into a angry one "WILL YOU STOP BIENG RUDE, IM TRYING TO DO MY WORK AND I AM EXHAUSTED, AND ALL I WANA DO IS SLEEP OKAY, IVE APOLOGIZED" she was really turning it on you , without a second to loose, you slapped her making her green hair fly in the air, she slightly smirked and charged at you your back crashing into the wall with a thud, "WHY ARE YOU SO FUCKING DRAMATIC" her nails pierced your skin, eventually you got out of her grip grabbing a glass and throwing it at the wall, you were aiming for the wall but also wanted to kinda hit Billie she ducked and ran at you, you ran upstairs, and side stepped her into going into your bedroom you locked it, you knew very well that she would get out so you have about 2 minutes to do something, you ran down stairs and grabbed her keys you heard the door fly open "Y/N GET YOUR FUCKING ASS BACK HERE!!!!" you made a run for it and ran to your car door you could see billie zooming out of the house, you turned the car on and hit the acceleration pedal, you looked at the rearview mirror seeing billie on two knees crying as you left "IM SORRY BABY, PLEASE FORGIVE ME, COME BACK" she said while pacing as you drove off….

a couple weeks later you had settled into an apartment, your ex's album had dropped, you saw an ad about her song "Chihiro" in the interview she said "this song expresses my love for somebody who means the world to me, i didn't show them what they deserved and i got what i deserved but whatever happens i still love them" you shut your laptop trying not to cry you knew it was for the better, you opened your phone to see hundreds of missed calls and voice messages from her and thousands of texts messages, you simply blocked her, should have you just let her off?

[ofc-vi-writes-too]

a continuation of things that i think happen in my favorite fucked up silly little city (gotham)

• In hosptials in Gotham there’s another wing dedicated to super villain attacks Like how theres the ED, NICU, L&D, ICU, etc., theres another branch called Excessive Villain Attack Department (for) Emergencies. Also known as EVADE for short. it’s a brag to say you work in EVADE for doctors/nurses because A. the pay is ridiculously good, and B. how much extra stuff you had to learn to work there. People who work in EVADE have to go through weekly psych evaluations as well as physical testing to make sure they are still fit for duty.

• there are EVADE pop ups all around gotham so it’s citizens ares never more than 5 minutes away from medical attention. You have to work at a pop up before you’re allowed to work in EVADE in a real hosptial. People say working the pop ups is a lot harder and a lot nore stressfull, because people can come to you in really any condition out there.

• Similar to how kids in some areas cant wear certain colors like red or blue to school because of gang affiliation, gothamite students cannot wear anything superhero, vigilante or villain adjacent. No birds, bats, clowns, etc. Its a way for schools to try and stop kids from being targetted by their peers/ crazy adults who will attack them for supporting a specific person or party. Hero or otherwise.

• A lot of mom and pop diners/townie bars have foods named after vigilantes and specialty drinks named after villains. Some examples are:

Red Hoods Hot Chicken and Mac: bufallo mac and chicken with house hot sauce, so hot and tasty it will bring tears to your eyes! (this is true. jason tried it and he literally couldn’t feel his face. He couldn’t tell if he was blinking or not. Dick swears up and down he wasn’t.)

Nightwings: boneless chicken wings with a honey barbecue dry rub, with bleu cheese dipping sauce and chips and a blue corn dip. Dick can and will order 4 and eat them all by himself in one sitting.

Robins Eggs Breakfast combo: 2 sunny side up eggs, strawberry french toast, vegetarian sausage, house salad and an OJ. They tried to make it vegan but no one in Gotham wants breakfast without eggs. Robin said he appreciates the thought anyway. He is very smug and protective of his meal and the restaurant that made it. When he has the day shft he stops by there for breakfast, which isn’t often but still.

Signal soup: a classic squash soup, house focaccia and a garden salad. Its a seasonal meal that comes around every fall, and sells out almost every day for the entire season.

The Scarecrow: literally a long island iced tea with black liqueur in a martini glass with 3 olives. It tastes fucking horrible but will get you beyond hammered

Poison Ivy: shot of pochteca lime liqueur and pink whitney. Very tasty.

Regulator: its a blue margarita with coconut milk in it. Its a little sweet but its yummy. It’s common to black out on these because you cant taste the alch and by the time it hits you its too late and its the next morning and your naked in a strangers bed. Darn those regulators for a night you wont remember! at least the guy is handsome…

• See also the Condiment King challenge: A pint size glass of equal parts ketchup, mustard, pickle relish, mayonnaise, hot sauce, soy sauce, honey mustard, sweet and sour, bbq, salsa, fish sauce, vinegar, ranch, and wasabi. Hell in a cup! If you can drink it within 10 minutes without throwing up, you eat free at the dinner for a month and you get a t shirt that says “I completed the Condiment King challenge at Jimbo’s Dinner!” With a poorly drawn picture of condiment king on it. There has only been one winner: Timothy Drake. Jason dared him to try it after he hadnt slept in 3 days. Tim didnt puke, but Jason did. There were threats of violence if Tim ever told anyone that. Tim didn’t believe him, told Dick and magically ended up with a broken finger. “No AlfredI have NOOOOOO idea how it happened! Must’ve had a bad fall on patrol :3”

• taxes in gotham are shit-your-pants-when-you-see-it-the-first-time high. Gotham has to be able to pay for all the damages somehow, despite Bruce Wayne paying for about 15% of those damages out of pocket, its still not enough to stop prices from skyrocketing. To try and combat this, there is a Gala held anually for the top 10% of Gotham to fundraise for emergency city repairs. It helps a lot but doesn’t solve the problem.