#and how it's vital when it comes to kids growing up into well-adjusted adults

[pynkhues]

YEEEESSS I am SO curious about if Rolin has someone in mind for her. I could see it either way, that he's had someone in mind since season 1 or that he's really open to ideas. Same with Marius actually. I know he said that Eric and Ben were the two he had from the beginning, but obviously he couldn't say yet if there was anyone else in there too. I wonder if Gabrielle will be someone where we all go, oh duh, can't believe I didn't think of her, or someone where we're more like WOAH I would not have thought of that.

Yeah I think that is it, that even though I like GA a lot, she's become a go-to for certain types of characters, and I want someone who doesn't carry a feeling of "oh okay, I know what this is."

YES I loved that Jacob said that he was really excited about Gabrielle and Louis' dynamic with her and Lestat -- that was one of a number of things that made me confident that Rolin is going to have Louis be a major element of next season, and that dynamic could be so fascinating.

Yeah! I actually love that Rolin obviously comes into this show with certain characters like, so firmly cast in his head, and others he's just so open to - I still love that they obviously went so broad in casting Jacob and Sam while being so targeted with Eric. It just feels like such a great approach when it comes to casting.

And I think that's a really good way to describe Gillian. I do like her, but I guess I just don't find her all that exciting and I feel I know exactly what to expect from her, which is good in some cases, but not what I want for Gabrielle (or IWTV in general tbh).

I am also literally obsessed with what the show is going to do with Louis and Gabrielle, haha. It lives rent free in my head! The book is so surface-level in their interactions, which is wild to me given Louis is not only discovering that he is one of maybe the only immortal creature's with a MIL still alive, but also that he's lowkey a lot like her at the exact same time Gabrielle is realising her son married a version of her too lol. There's also soooo much to explore in the fact that I think Claudia and Gabrielle would have gotten along really well (and it's interesting to think about whether or not Louis could've let go of Claudia a little easier / encouraged her independence if she was traveling with her nomadic grandmother rather than on her own).

[valiancyvulnerability]

What It’s Like Being Gay in a Town Where It Isn’t Accepted

     I made the choice to come out publicly mid-March of 2020, after the COVID-19 pandemic left the majority of Illinois stuck in our homes for the safety of others. I thought this would be a good time for me to make my announcement as it was an opportunity to avoid facing any of my peers after the fact, and I also wanted to do so before I moved into my first year of college.

     If I’m being honest, it was something I had always feared as a child. Being an individual who tries too hard to please everyone and be liked, I knew it was something that wasn’t necessarily the most accepted where I lived. I live in a predominantly white and conservative area, and there is nothing wrong with that, but that is a vital piece of information to know as I explain myself in this piece of writing. I moved to my current town when I was in the first grade, and based off my interests, personality, and mannerisms, everyone immediately made their assumptions about me, so I quickly began to alter and adjust accordingly in order to keep the remarks at bay. Additionally, my mom worked in the school district, so in order to avoid being talked about since I already felt like I was in the public eye, I just wanted to blend in with the crowd as much as I could.

     The lying to myself and to everyone around me didn’t cease until I was already out of high school. The first three words that title this post are “What It’s Like”, so with that being said, I want to share specific experiences I have had growing up that have stuck with me, and are all contributors as to why I waited so long to come out. Being gay in a town where it isn’t accepted is:

Giving a sheet of paper that has “GAY” written in big letters to your Kindergarten teacher, asking what it meant and why a 16 year-old handed it to you on the bus

Being targeted by a group of first grade classmates at recess for being a gymnast, and that it’s a “gay sport for girls”

Being told in an elementary music class, with an unchanged voice, as all elementary schoolers have, that I sing like a girl and that it would make more sense to go sit with them if we sound the same anyways

Being twelve and intentionally coughed on by an eighth grader, followed by the kindest “Move out of my way, faggot”

Hearing boys on the other side of the locker room say they feel uncomfortable that they have to change around me

Being shoved into a gym locker without any clothes on

Hearing an upperclassman say they don’t want the “fat closeted kid” on his team in gym class

Being shown a photo of a skinned deer with a caption “I am going to cut you up”

Singing a solo for a school assembly with the choir and directly facing the front row of boys while they laugh

Being called out in class for “only wanting equal LGBTQ+ rights because I’m too scared to come out of the closet”

Having someone tell you, (”No offense”), “If you want my guy friends to like you, you just need to stop acting gay, because you do a little bit” and that “you dressed like a grandma today”

Being called a bloody tampon because you dyed your hair red

Being laughed at for what you’re wearing by a whole table of underclassman boys that turn around and watch you get a napkin before lunch

Having a group of boys from school make a (very condescending) point to all like a boy’s comment complimenting one of my pictures on social media

And this is the one that will stick with me more than any other one:

Being sent this message on an anonymous social media platform this year-- 

“You’re the biggest f***wad I know. Just come out as gay already because you’ve seen more girls get undressed simply because you’re friends with them. Your tattoo looks cool but that’s about it. You look like an emo girl trying not to cut her wrists”

My mother raised me on kindness. She raised me on lifting others up. She raised me on being there for others. The thing I struggled with the most is that I couldn’t get my mind wrapped around the fact that I tried my hardest to be kind to others, no matter how they treated me, and it felt like I just had disrespect and insults spat back at me. I found myself using the “not everyone is going to like you” phrase often, because there were many times where it felt like, truly, I was disliked by everyone.

My junior year of high school, I fell into an eating disorder, and consequently lost weight and started dressing differently to dodge any negative attention that I had been faced with previously. I started partying. Drinking every weekend. Hanging with people fueled by hate. The result was all I could have asked for. I was liked by my classmates. I was on Homecoming Court. Guys at my school willingly spoke to me. The only issue with all of that though is that there was no genuine part of Carson that was present. It was entirely phony.

Once I found a friend group I felt accepted in my senior year of high school, my world entirely changed. I gradually found myself and became more comfortable with who I was as a person and I no longer felt a need to pretend about anything. I had that sense of security, so I didn’t have to worry about the opinions of people that didn’t have anything to do with me. I knew who I was, and I was still going to be respectful and kind towards those who weren’t to me, because that’s all I can do.

With all that said, there are some things that can be done.

I understand if my way of life doesn’t completely align with your beliefs, and I completely respect that. However, if it doesn’t affect you directly, then there is no point, none at ALL, to make an individual feel lesser than you, feel isolated, or feel like an alien. I have always been Carson, and always will be.

I am not a parent so some may think my opinion is unjustified here, but as children we are taught certain principles and morals that shape the way we treat others. If a child is raised that they need to show kindness to everyone EXCEPT group ABC or group XYZ, then something is wrong there in my eyes. 

My teachers were always great about making everyone feel included and welcome in their classrooms. I do challenge the education system as a whole, though, to not shy away from conflict regarding homophobia. Many times it is brushed off to avoid “ruffling any feathers”, so to speak, but that is not a solution that I can find the least bit of validity in. By sitting back and letting mistreatment happen to avoid “taking a side”, unfortunately, you are doing nothing but taking the side of the oppressor.

As the youth is shifting towards a more vocal and diverse generation, it is important for this to be talked about. Your location on the map should not be a deciding factor in how you are going to be treated, especially if it’s something you live with that can not and will not change. There is so much negativity and mistreatment among children and adolescents that is swept under the rug, and there needs to be some sort of action taken to get the general attitude among the youth (and adults, too, for that matter) moving in a more positive direction.

Be kind to one another. Find common ground within your differences, and learn to respect them. Stay safe and healthy, as always, and I hope everyone is doing well.

And happy Pride Month.

[crossdressingdeath]

Okay I’ve had a very long day and people are being super defensive of JC on my dash so uh. I’m gonna talk shit about him for a bit. Because it’ll make me feel better. And I don’t want anyone arguing with me about this so I’ll put it behind a cut and if you don’t want to read someone talking shit about JC in a super unstructured manner then... don’t click read more, I guess? 

So here’s one thing, to start. In The Untamed specifically, I can argue with near-absolute certainty that JC killed WWX. LWJ had him, and that guy is insanely strong; I don’t doubt for a second he could’ve pulled WWX up if he’d been given the chance. Maybe JC didn’t put a blade through WWX’s heart himself, but if he had stayed out of it WWX probably would’ve lived. I don’t know how long he would’ve lived, and I doubt he would’ve thanked LWJ for saving him, but he probably wouldn’t have died on that cliff. Hell, killing him quickly might have been a kindness; I’m not an expert on how far you have to fall to die instantly on impact and I don’t know how high that cliff was, but depending on how he landed and if he bounced off anything on the way down it’s possible (though maybe not likely) that WWX wouldn’t have died right away. If I had to choose between a quick death via a blade through a vital part or a more lasting death via serious internal damage from a very long fall... Yeah, I’d take the stabbing. Obviously I’m not saying that not being able to go through with killing his brother makes JC a bad person; I’m just saying that when his choices were doing nothing (which, reminder, here means letting LWJ pull WWX up (or at least try to)), helping LWJ save his brother, finishing WWX off quickly (JC is trained in combat, I’m sure he knows where to stab for the most merciful death possible under those circumstances), or letting WWX fall to his death... I just find it interesting that JC chose the latter.

Hell, even before that, if JC had done something sooner a whole lot of pain could’ve been avoided. (We’re out of the Untamed-exclusive stuff, by the way.) Now, I get that as a very new sect leader of a sect that was almost obliterated JC’s position is... precarious, to say the least. However! An awkward position doesn’t automatically mean he can pretty much abandon his brother! That is not how familial ties work! Especially when he never takes WWX’s position (which was equally precarious if not more so) into account while talking about how WWX abandoned him.

Put yourself in JC’s shoes for a moment, here. Most of your family is dead. Your brother, you know, was thrown into a hell pit and hasn’t been seen for three months. Then, joy of joys, you find him again! Except now your ever-cheerful, ever-kindhearted brother can raise the dead and, oh yeah, has spent all his time since escaping the hell pit that no one survives torturing people to death with demonic cultivation. What do you do in this situation? I’m fairly sure your answer was not “Throw him on the front lines as your most valuable weapon without giving him so much as a chance to come to terms with all the horrible things that have clearly happened to him”. Yes, yes, they were in the middle of war, but you don’t get to throw your very obviously messed up brother onto the front lines and then be shocked when there are serious consequences for doing that.

Also, going back to positions: People talk a lot about how JC’s position was so difficult, and I’m not saying it wasn’t, but... here’s the thing. WWX’s position was so much worse. JC is the sect leader of an old and powerful sect. The Jiangs might have lost a great deal, but there are still alliances he could call on, favours he could probably cash in, treasures reclaimed from the Wens he could use... He’s not exactly helpless. He has to be careful, but he’s not entirely defenseless. Meanwhile, WWX is the incredibly powerful demonic cultivator with a dangerous weapon everyone wants to get their hands on and a brother he’s known to have a somewhat strained relationship with. We see in canon that the sects are actively hunting for a chance to get their teeth into him after the Sunshot Campaign wraps up. All WWX has is his own power and JC’s support. I keep coming back to what JGY says at the temple, about how JC made WWX an easy target by making it obvious their relationship was rocky, and... he’s right. I doubt JC intended to do it, but he made it very easy for the sects to split WWX off from him. And while JC was still a sect leader and largely untouchable, WWX was infinitely more vulnerable. Again, I doubt he meant to paint a target on his brother’s back, but the fact that he missed it in favour of getting pissy about WWX being better than him yet again says something about him.

The fact that he says there’s nothing he can do after WWX absconds with the Wen remnants says... something else. Now, I’m terrible with politics; while he definitely should have supported his brother in a perfect world, with a sect to look after and JGS hunting for weak points I genuinely don’t know if he could have at that point. (Again, I really do think he should’ve tried to step in before things got to this point, but... well, he didn’t. No use crying over spilled milk and all that.) So okay, he couldn’t do anything. I’ll take him at his word; if nothing else, I can believe he was too bad with both politics and people and too inexperienced to find a way to step in. But he then takes his brother’s request to remove him from the Jiang sect to avoid any trouble coming to their doorstep and goes off and tells the sects that his brother is a traitor. Let me put that another way. He tells the people who are looking for an excuse to murder his brother and take his writings and inventions for themselves that his brother has betrayed them. I think we have reached the point where malice and stupidity become impossible to tell apart. Honestly, I can only see two possible thought processes for this: Either he actually wants to bring the sects down on WWX’s heads (unlikely) or he’s so terrible at politics that he genuinely didn’t realize what the logical result of his words would be (more likely, but means his parents did a terrible job of teaching him how to be a sect leader). Although, given he apparently spent enough of the 13 years between WWX’s death and resurrection spending so much time torturing demonic cultivators to death because either he thought they might be WWX or they just reminded him of him that most of the citizens in his territory are too scared to go to Lotus Pier for help unless they’re in imminent life-threatening danger I don’t think you can argue he was a good sect leader by any stretch...

Oh! Speaking of parents and teaching: Jin Ling. Now, part of this might be a cultural thing that I’m not familiar with, but JC is an absolutely god-awful guardian. Pretty much all he does is insult JL, belittle him, or threaten him. Yeah, he cares in his own way, but take it from me: When your parents (or uncle, in this case) spend most of their time insulting you but also keep you safe from any external danger and do their best to help you grow, you don’t end up a happy, well-adjusted adult; you end up miserable and confused because you can’t hate or like the person raising you and get stuck between love and resentment. JL is clearly desperate for affection, but he can’t admit that to anyone. It’s no surprise he mourns for JGY so deeply even after everything; the guy was pretty much the only one in the poor kid’s life to treat him with open, honest affection before he met WWX! The comparison between him and Sizhui (as the only other child raised by the main cast) is striking; even though LWJ seems like he should be just as bad a parent, he raises Sizhui with love and kindness, and so did WWX before him. And the result is... so very different. Sizhui is the very goodest of boys and I love him with all my heart. Anyway, it’s no wonder JL gravitates towards WWX and defends him once he’s gotten past his initial reaction of stabbing the guy; WWX is so open and explicit with his affection! Is he a perfect parent? No, probably not. But he focuses more on making it clear to his army of juniors that he loves them and respects them as people and wants them to be happy with where they end up in life than he does on making them fit his image of what they should be. Of course someone who’d be raised with JC copying his mother and constantly getting on their case about not being good enough would gravitate towards someone like that.

Okay, this is getting long. Last point: WWX has to put in so much emotional labour in their relationship even before everything goes tits up? The best example for me is the scene where WWX promises they’ll be together forever, Twin Heroes of Yunmeng, the huge promise that both JC and an annoyingly large portion of the audience think he should’ve kept no matter what. Yeah, out of context it’s very sweet, but in context? WWX has just barely recovered from the fight with the Xuanwu. He’s been conscious for... maybe an hour, at most? He nearly died. And yet he has to drag himself out of bed to chase JC through Lotus Pier to comfort him because JFM was paying more attention to WWX. Who, again, almost died. JC is so busy being pissy about this that he forces his brother, still recovering, to chase him through Lotus Pier to comfort him for something their parents did. Most of the time, JC has a right to be upset that JFM so obviously prefers WWX. Looking in from the outside the situation is clearly more complicated than he paints it, but I don’t blame him for not seeing how bad things are for the rest of the family. ...I know that sounds sarcastic, but I do mean it. His siblings are very good at hiding how badly their family situation has hurt them. Anyway, though, on this one occasion I am entirely on JFM’s side here. WWX threw himself into danger so JC wouldn’t have to go to the indoctrination camp alone even though he didn’t have to, then some time later JC returns alone and informs him that WWX is trapped in a cave with the Xuanwu of Slaughter, then when JFM finally manages to reach him the Xuanwu is dead and WWX is all but dead. I 100% do not blame him for focusing on WWX in this situation! He did something fully-grown cultivators with far more experience failed at and almost died in the process! Given JC must be... what, 16 at the youngest, probably older by this point? I would expect him to grasp that. He’s old enough to have developed empathy. Hell, he should be right there with his father and sister, proud of WWX’s accomplishments and relieved to see him awake and recovering. Instead, WWX has to drag himself through Lotus Pier and swear to stay by JC’s side for the rest of their lives just to get him to stop sulking because WWX was better than him yet again.

...Yeah, as you might have grasped, I don’t think WWX had any obligation to uphold that promise. He shouldn’t have been expected to be tied to Lotus Pier by a vow he made as a teenager to get his brother to cheer up. In fact, a very large part of me wishes he’d broken it sooner. Comparing the way JC treats him to the way the Wens and LWJ treat him (setting aside that those are of course very different kinds of love) I can’t help but think things might have gone infinitely better for him if he’d found a different family a lot earlier.

[yellowtailbirdy]

Understanding The Spiritual Connection With Your Inner Child

It is surprising to find out that our happiness today is very dependent on experiences from so long ago, from our childhood. If you think of your childhood experiences as a starting map for the future, and you become aware of the effects the past has on your current life, you will be closer to a happier life. How you were raised and the interactions you had in those important first years determine how well-adjusted you are and how you make your choices.

Your inner child is a powerful part of your mind, your friendly, joyful, emotional, free, playful side. It represents the small child you used to be that needed love and comfort, and it combines your most basic emotions, the sensitivity and creativity you were born with and that you might have suppressed while growing up.

The inner child is the human’s childlike aspect and it draws from everything that you have learned and experienced as a kid before puberty. This inner child signifies a semi-independent unit that subordinates to your conscious mind and being aware of it can help you improve your life. Your inner child is your essence, the aspect of your awareness that is naturally innocent, uncomplicated and playful.

How to discover your inner child

Learning how to discover your inner child allows you to experience a happy and balanced life. As you search for your inner child, you have a chance to improve your emotional freedom and become more at peace with yourself. This type of deep spiritual connection affects all areas of your life, so by uncovering your inner child, you will also feel more joyful, more energized and even change your perspective on some undoubted things. Here are a few simple steps:

1. Stop restricting your actions – Always consider how impulsive you are now compared to your childhood. Instead of ignoring that instinct, try to listen to that voice that tells you to try something new. Let yourself explore new activities and feelings, invite novelty in your life, enjoy the freedom from regular constraints.

2. Explore your imagination – Allow yourself continually to be imaginative, both in your actions and thinking. Stop worrying about what others want or hope or expect of you, and instead use your inspiration to find new resources for your happiness.

3. Enhance your listening skills – To improve your listening skills, don’t forget to start with the smallest things, like the sound of your heartbeat. Then, start paying attention to the sounds around you and find out what they mean to you. Focus your heart and mind on the important messages from your universe.

4. Embrace the spirit energy – While doing this, you are opening the flow and developing the skills of awareness to the inner voice. This can help in making decisions at the right place and at the right time. It can also help attract the people you need and create synchronicity in your life.

5. Pause to laugh and smile – Everyone has problems in life, but it doesn’t mean that you should not find reasons to smile. Be grateful every day for your experiences, and always look for new activities to make your life more interesting and exciting.

6. Engage the world using your senses – Simply recall how the world seemed brighter when you were a child. Those images should remind you how happy you were when you viewed the world from a more enthusiastic perspective. You should take time to appreciate the colours of the street you walk on every day, or the smell of the freshly baked pie you just took out of the oven, or the feel of the new dress you just bought.

Bringing out our inner child, nurturing it and making a conscious effort to connect with it is a powerful experience that brings forth a lot about us, our feelings and our pursuit for happiness. In this process of discovery, sometimes you may find there are still wounds from the past that have not healed properly, even though you may not think too much about them now. It is vital to heal your mental bruises and help yourself and our inner child to a happier path.

The emotional wounds you have suffered in your childhood can develop with time. As time passes by, you may become emotionally susceptible and dysfunctional as an adult. The signs can range from low self-esteem, emotional imbalances, eating disorders, identity issues, intimacy troubles or even addictions to substances and criminal behaviour.

Real happiness can only come from healing your inner child and this will allow you to discover the source of many fears, insecurities and undermining life patterns. Only by reaching out to your inner child and showing love can you empower yourself to live a better life, and here are a few steps that can help you with that endeavor:

Step 1: Earn the trust of your inner child – To heal your wounded inner child, you have to develop trust. This means that your inner child needs to have faith in you and it should understand your sole purpose is to protect and nurture it.

Step 2: Fight his extreme pains – Like a frightened child, you have to help your inner child to overcome pain and move on. Try to understand the grief of your inner child and learn to embrace it. After embracing the sufferings of your inner child, you are one step closer to profound healing.

Step 3: Let go of your anger – Though it is natural to be angry, it doesn’t mean that you have to be mad at all times. Through forgiving, you have a chance to heal your inner child. Forgiveness takes a considerable deal of love and dedication for others.

Step 4: Fight the loneliness –Make sure that your inner child feels accepted, loved and understood and that it recognizes its true self. You have to help it drive away the guilt of the past in order to embrace the joy of the present.

Because we all carry a piece of our childhood essence within us, it helps to understand how it influences our lives and how we can use it to develop a more fulfilled way of life. By recognizing and nurturing your inner child, you can benefit from a feeling of completeness, true independence from the past, freedom to express yourself and a natural sense of optimism, inspiration, and resilience.

So, don’t underestimate the power of your inner child!

http://winstonclements.com/understanding-the-spiritual-connection-with-your-inner-child/

[sassycloudmoneyflap]

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Higher Perspective

Oct. 07, 2017 04:56AM EST

10+ Habits of Toxic Parents and How They Ruin Children Without Realizing It

When you have a child, your entire life changes. Suddenly, everything is for the baby. Every parent wants to be able to do right by their kids.

But there are many things that stand between you and being not a good parent, but the kind of parent your child needs.

That's the right way to look at it, in my opinion. Good and bad are relative. But all kids need approximately the same thing in order to grow into happy, healthy, successful human beings.

Parents neglect to give their kids what they need for a lot of reasons. I've seen parents read so many parenting books that they end up not knowing which way is the right way.

I've also seen parents who just don't care, letting their kids do whatever they feel like, or even worse, neglecting and abusing them.

One thing is for sure, there are a number of truly toxic behaviors that imprint on our kids and deeply, profoundly impact their life growing up.

These are habits and actions that you should be avoiding at all costs. Some are physical, some psychological, and some are social.

00:1300:42

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If you know someone who's recently become a parent or is about to be, be sure to share this article with them to help them be the best parents they can be.

1. Not Respecting Boundaries

It's important for parents to think about the boundaries they've set for their children.

When I was young, my parents established some very important boundaries.

Stay out of the parents bedroom. Stay out of mom's office. Stay out of dad's man cave.

There were good reasons for those rules! You're adults, you own things like porno mags and marital aids. You don't want kids getting into that!

But kids also have things they don't want you to get into too. You can't expect kids to feel like respected individuals if you also don't honor their personal space and their boundaries too.

When your kids get older into their teen years, you should not be snooping.

They don't go through your underwear drawer, you shouldn't go through theirs either.

They're old enough that simply talking to them about worries you might have are good enough. Use your words. Don't be intrusive.

2. Failing To Provide Affirmation and Security

A lot of parents, stereotypical macho dad types especially, think that punishment is king.

It takes tough love to shape and sculpt especially young boys into strong, capable young men.

But tough love isn't how you make sure your kids can take care of themselves. Teaching them to take care of themselves is how you teach them to take care of themselves.

Simple, right? By punishing your children over every little thing, you cripple their ability to be strong in the face of life's challenges, because any sign of failure will be met with swift...something.

Not punishment, but...something. Disappointment. Frustration. Anger. Withholding.

We should be teaching our kids about the world as an adult.

When you're an adult and you fail at something, you don't have some authority figure that takes away your gameboy until you do better.

You try harder to do better, and that comes from within.

3. Being Overly Critical

We all have dreams and goals that we don't achieve.

Maybe you wanted to be a football star but you tore your ACL in high school and all that went out the window.

Maybe you were almost the math league champ but didn't quite make it. One thing is for sure: you should not be projecting your failures onto your children.

You can't force your kids to be something that you wish you were. When you do that, you crush their self esteem.

When you project what you want for your kids onto them without letting them choose, and when you level unrealistic expectations, you don't make them better or stronger.

You make them weaker and less likely to be empowered with the tools to take on the challenges of their adult lives.

4. Not Following Through

Parents want to be their kids' best friends. But that's not what kids want.

You don't want to unintentionally raise a terrible adult, and one of the ways you avoid that is by setting rules and actually following through with them.

If you're a new parent, it's good to experiment a little; to see what works and what doesn't.

But at some point you have to see what guidelines and rules work and actually follow through on them. I get it. No parent wants to punish their kids.

No parent wants to tell their kids what's what and see those tears well up. But you need to be able to not manipulate but adjust the mindset of your kids through these guidelines.

You don't want to crush bad habits but develop and incentivize good habits.

5. Not Offering Space

As your kids get older, they need more space from you. This is an important part of growing up.

At some point, you have to stop telling them what to do and you have to stop doing important things for them.

You can't do their homework. You can't write their college entrance essay.

At some point, you need to look at your kids and say, "figure it out. I'll help if you need me too." But even then, make sure that you're not doing anything of the figuring out for them.

Be ready to let your "baby" go when they know they need to figure things out on their own.

Parents who deeply love their kids find it hard to let go the part of their life where mommy and daddy are crucial for every little thing.

But to impose yourself long after that kind of parenting is needed is wrong.

6. Serving Your Kids

You should have a strong sense by now that the right form of parenting is somewhere in the middle of both extremes.

You don't want to throw your kids to the wolves but you also don't want to serve them. When your kids are old enough to learn to cook, teach them to cook.

When your kids are old enough to do laundry, have them do laundry. When your kids are old enough to drive, for God's sake, teach them to drive.

It is important that you don't pamper and serve your kids forever. They need to learn vital skills to maintain themselves as adults.

One of the things I find myself bemoaning the most is how much skill has been lost between my grandparents and me.

There are a lot of skills they had that I just didn't have instilled in me. It's important to give your kids the knowledge that you were given, and pampering them won't teach them anything good.

7. Threatening and Intimidating Your Kids

It's frustrating dealing with the little things with your kids.

They often become afraid and unsure at things that are simple and second nature for you.

They don't always succeed at self control which can be endlessly difficult for a parent simple trying to parent the right way. But what you absolutely can't do is level threats.

"If you don't _____ then _____." "If you ever ____, this is what's going to happen to you."

Under this kind of authority, you've completely destroyed your child's confidence in you.

They won't feel like they can come to you for help because a threat has been leveled.

How can you really talk to a person candidly and honestly about something you're going through if you feel like the result is going to be a punishment of some kind?

8. Helicoptering

The millennial generation will tell horror stories of helicopter parenting.

Check out any reddit thread about helicopter parents and you'll see the carnage they leave behind in the form of adults who don't know up from down and left from right.

When you have a baby, you have to do everything for it. You have to do everything in your power to care for it and make sure it survives.

But you have to let some of that go as time goes by.

You have to honor their mistakes and appreciate their successes and let them grow into independent people.

If you don't, you've raised an adult who doesn't have the skills necessary to succeed on their own.

9. Not Listening

I'll let you in on a secret: kids aren't stupid.

They can read sarcasm and tell when you're condescending and not listening to them because you think they're just some dumb kid.

Parents: you need to listen to your kids. It's hard to find value in the babble they sometimes send off into the world through their faces but it doesn't matter.

When you listen to your kids, and I mean really listen, it tells them that they're unique individuals who have something to offer this world that we're living in.

True, a 4 year old probably won't ever have something particularly compelling to say to you, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't show them that what they say is important, because it actually is.

Stuff that seems mundane to you might be absolutely mind blowing to them.

If a child tells you that she saw a brown dog that day, hear what they're saying. That may be a first for them.

They want to talk about the incredible experiences they have the same way you do. Listen to your kids.

10. Being A Lazy Parent

For some parents, kids come into the picture and it's so overwhelming that they just kind of hit cruise control and zone out.

Lots of frozen TV dinners and movies in the car.

It's easy to park a kid in front of the TV for 6 hours and then just sit around and be lazy, but being a parent takes work.

It's the hardest job you can possible have. But you have to actually teach your children things. You have to spend time with them, cook with them, and instill all these healthy habits.

It's hard to get your kid to eat well, but you have to. It's hard to get your kid to brush their teeth and floss, but you have to.

It's hard to teach your kid to manage their own homework, to drive a car, to get a job, but all of these things are so fundamentally important that skipping just one can cripple your child for life.

Don't be a lazy parent.

11. Being Friends With Your Child

Not long ago, I was reading about how many kids entering college, when asked about their relationship with their parents, they said their parents were their "best friends."

This is not the kind of relationship that any child should have with their parents until much, much later in life.

A 17-19 year old fledgling of the house should not see their parents as friends but as parents.

You are your child's world to give them guidance, structure, and rules. When our kids, in their volatile teen years, lash out at you for your rigidity, it is not a sign to let up.

It's also not a sign to clamp down. It is a sign you're doing the right thing. You're teaching them, and sometimes these lessons are hard to learn. Your kids should not view you as a friend, but as a parent.

Are you still searching for your life purpose? You won't believe what the science of Numerology can reveal about you!

That's right, the numerology of your birth date, regardless of what month you were born, can reveal surprising information about your personality.

Unlock the messages hidden in your Personality Code now with your free personalized video report!

Click HERE to learn what Numerology says about your life using only your Name and Birth Date.

If you found this article interesting or entertaining, please remember to SHARE the content with your family and friends on Facebook!

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[dailyofferstore-blog]

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[newstfionline]

11 Important Lessons I’ve Learned from Working with the Homeless

By Marc, The Vital Dollar, Feb 21, 2019

In the fall of 2017, after reading the book The Hole in Our Gospel, I started volunteering at a local homeless shelter as a way to give back and help people in need within my own community.

I had served meals at a different homeless shelter during my freshman year of college and it was a very rewarding experience. I thought about doing that again many times, but I never took the initiative to actually make it happen. Eventually, in 2017 I knew I needed to stop thinking I didn’t have the time and just take action.

When I contacted the volunteer coordinator, I offered to help out with serving meals or washing dishes. I prefer working behind the scenes, so that type of job would be ideal for me. But the volunteer coordinator said they needed help with their men’s Bible study.

For the past year and about four months, I’ve been going into the shelter once a week (although I do miss some weeks) for a Bible study with the residents of their men’s program. While they are technically homeless, all of the guys that I work with are staying at the shelter, so they are not living on the streets currently. They are provided with meals, a bed, and other necessities. They’re also participating in life skills classes with the goal of getting a job and getting back on their feet financially. They may be in the program anywhere from a few weeks to two years.

Most of what I do there is completely outside my comfort zone. I’d much rather serve food or wash dishes, but so far I’ve stuck with it because I feel like I’m there for a reason, even if I don’t know what that reason is.

The dynamic of the group is really interesting. Usually, there are 20-30 men at the Bible study and right now there is a chaplain that organizes it and then I am the only volunteer. Of the guys in the program, some of them enjoy being a part of the Bible study and they participate in the discussions. Other guys don’t want to be there, and they are only there because it’s a requirement of being in the program. If they had somewhere else to go, they would.

The vast majority of guys in the program are just coming out of prison. They are usually referred by the prison or the prison chaplain, from what I’ve been told. Some of them are required to be in this program, or one like it, as a condition of their release. If those guys leave the program, they go back to prison.

One of the nice things about volunteering for the Bible study instead of another type of project is that I’ve been able to get to know a lot of the guys in the program, and I consider them to be friends.

My experience there has already taught me a lot. It has reinforced some things that I already knew, and it has led me to look at things from a completely different perspective than I have in the past. I wanted to write this article to share some of the most important lessons I’ve learned.

1. Some People Start Life at a Disadvantage. From the discussions I’ve had with the guys in the program, the one thing that stands out to me more than any other is that most of them faced huge challenges that I’ve never faced. In many cases, I’d say they never had a chance for a normal, productive, healthy life.

I’ve heard stories of terrible physical, verbal, and emotional abuse. The guys in the program are all adults, but some are young and some are old. One thing they have in common, almost all of them had very difficult family situations when they were growing up, and that has contributed to problems throughout their lives.

It’s easy to look at someone in prison, or someone who has served time in the past, and say that person’s struggles are a result of their own poor decisions. I’m not minimizing accountability, but the truth is, not everyone faces the same challenges or has the same opportunities. I’m not sure how my life would have turned out if I had no good adult role models when I was growing up.

2. Good Parenting is Critical. Going along with the previous point, this has led me to a greater desire to be a good father to my two kids. I’ve seen that how I raise my kids will have a huge impact on them for the rest of their lives.

It’s not a responsibility to be taken lightly.

Very few of the guys that I’ve worked with in the program had a father who was involved in their lives in a positive way when they were growing up. For the most part, their fathers were either not around, or not very loving and supportive.

I fail as a parent a lot. But I’m trying to get better and trying to spend quality time with my kids and be there for them in whatever way they need me. Hopefully, I’ll be a positive influence on my kids, not a negative one.

3. Our Decisions Have Long-Lasting Consequences. As I mentioned, most of the guys in the program have served time in prison. They’re now done with their prison sentence and are working to put their lives back together, but they’re still suffering the consequences of past decisions and mistakes. Many of them struggle to get a job because of their record, and when they do get a job they are on a very short leash.

They want to turn their lives around, but the mistakes from their past are sometimes hard to overcome.

This isn’t always about legal issues, prison, or jobs. Sometimes the poor decisions and consequences are related to marriages and other family relationships. Working to improve relationships with parents, siblings, and kids is something I hear about pretty often.

4. Addiction Can Cost You Everything. Drug and alcohol issues are a very common problem for guys in the program. Of course, it’s probably not a surprise that men in a homeless shelter tend to have a history of drug or alcohol addiction. We know how damaging addictions can be, but that’s only been reinforced through the guys that I’ve gotten to know.

Drug and alcohol addictions damage relationships, lead to financial problems, and can even result in poor choices that lead to prison. If you’re struggling with an addiction, do whatever you can to get help as soon as possible.

5. Very Little of What We Have is Truly Necessary. How much do we really need?

Most of us, myself included, think of a lot things as necessities. In reality, there is very little that is truly necessary.

Several months ago, I was talking with one of the guys after the Bible study. He had served multiple prison sentences, and in some ways he was more comfortable in prison and struggling to adjust to life on the outside. He told me that pretty much everything we pursue in life, he sees as a distraction.

The shelter meets the basic needs of the guys in the program by providing food and a place to sleep. They also get things like shampoo and soap, and I think clothes if needed. I’m not sure about you, but there are a lot of other things that I look at as necessities. But the truth is, we really don’t need that much.

6. Change is Possible, But Not Easy. One of the things I love about working with the men in the program is that I can see their desire to improve their lives. I don’t hear excuses for mistakes that have put them in difficult circumstances.

A lot of them have already made big progress, but it doesn’t come easily. Changing habits, overcoming additions, fixing broken relationships, and proving yourself to be more than your past failures all take time and consistent effort.

7. A Community Can Be a Very Powerful Thing. By volunteering at the shelter, I’ve seen the power of community in a few ways. First, the community has a huge impact on this program and this organization’s existence. All of the programs are funded by donors, and without individuals or corporate supporters, none of it would be possible. Every week I see people who have a chance at a better future because of the generosity of others.

The other example of community comes from the guys in the program. The residents there spend a lot of time around each other, and those who are there for a while get to know each other very well. It’s great to see how they look out for each other and step up when someone needs help.

8. Discipline is Important in So Many Ways. Overcoming difficult situations requires a lot of discipline. This applies to financial troubles, addictions, relationship issues, jobs, and so much else in life.

A lot of the guys in the program have the discipline and patience to stick with it and truly improve their lives. I know a few guys who have been there almost two years going through classes and life skills training.

But it’s also extremely common for guys to come and go quickly. In a lot of cases, they’re not leaving under the best terms. Some have made mistakes and gone back to prison. Others have been dismissed from the program for poor choices. And others have chosen to leave.

The men who make the most of the program have the discipline to stick with things that may be tough.

9. Poverty is More About Circumstances and Decisions Than it is About Intelligence or Laziness. Something that’s stood out to me is that the guys in the program are very intelligent. They’re also hard workers. Most of the jobs that they’re able to get are manual labor of some sort. They seem to be very motivated and want to work hard to take advantage of the opportunity.

From my perspective, their circumstances (like the environment that they grew up in) have had a big impact on the position they’re in right now. They are also, for the most part, living through the consequences of past mistakes. The circumstances aren’t an excuse for the mistakes, but those circumstances are part of the explanation for why those mistakes have been made.

When I hear the stories of how these guys were raised, it’s no wonder that they’ve had trouble as adults. If you have no one to teach you (and show you by example) how to make good decisions, of course you’re going to be more likely to make mistakes.

If you look at poverty around the world, much of it is related to circumstances. People in Africa and other poor parts of the world have almost no chance. They’re not poor because they are lazy or unintelligent. They’re poor because they were born into an incredibly difficult situation, and it takes everything they have just to survive.

I haven’t avoided poverty and homelessness because of intelligence or hard work. The circumstances I was born and raised in gave me a huge advantage over some people.

When you see a homeless person, don’t assume that they’re lazy. You have no idea what circumstances led to the position that they’re in now.

We’re all responsible for the decisions that we make, but not all bad decisions have serious consequences. I’ve made plenty of bad decisions in my life, but fortunately they haven’t had life-altering consequences.

10. There are Many Ways You Will Be Blessed for Serving. When I started volunteering at the shelter I wanted to help people in need. Hopefully, during that time I’ve been able to help in some way, but I can say for sure that I have been blessed by it.

I’ve learned more from the guys in the program than they’ve learned from me, for sure.

We shouldn’t volunteer or serve for selfish reasons, but when you serve or give, you’ll be blessed as well. Of course, we all know the saying “it’s better to give than to receive.”

11. It’s Not My Place to Judge Anyone. I think it’s our natural human reaction to judge others, even if it’s not what we’re supposed to do.

I know most of the guys in the program have served time in prison. I’ve never asked any of them if they’ve been in prison or what they were convicted of, but sometimes it comes up in the discussion. Some of the guys have been convicted of things that are hard for me to come to grips with. My role is to be some sort of encouragement and assistance to them, with the hope that they don’t make the same mistakes in the future. It’s not my job to judge them for the things they’ve done. I certainly don’t want people judging me for my worst moments.

The past can’t be changed, but hopefully with a second chance and some help, the future is a lot better.

[spider-man-stan]

Stuck between a sky scraper and a hard place.

not something that was requested, just an idea that i really liked and have been meaning to write for the longest time and has nothing to do with the fact that i’m having a shit night and really need some positivity right now. if you like it, reblog and maybe leave a nice tag or two bc i won’t bother writing a second part if no one like the first one lmao. anyways, i hope you enjoy!

“Pete, how’re we looking on civilian evac?” Tony asked as he blasted another goop monster into a lifeless puddle. As much as Tony wanted to be funding the future, he had decided about thirty seven minutes ago that he really needed some kind of screening on what highly impressionable young adults he was just handing heaps and heaps of money to.

Because while he totally had the money to just dump millions onto one university to the next, giving the next generation of geniuses the tools they needed to fund their new, initiative, “out of the box” projects that would otherwise never get funded, he was now realizing that not everyone’s “out of the box” ideas should be funded.

Like, as a totally random example, some guy who idolized slash hated Bruce Banner slash the Hulk and attempted to create a “new race” of Hulks that would enslave humanity. Or at least that’s how this nutcase put it in his five minute monologue. Like c’mon, Tony was dramatic, but even he knew how to keep his battle monologues under two minutes max. This guy was just over the fucking top.

Jesus Christ, it’s like the universe can never give Tony Stark a break, in any aspect of his life, ever.

“Good! I think we’ve almost got everyone out of the way!” Peter yelled back over the coms. Tony had given the kid evacuation duty with Cap, while Nat and Clint protected Bruce as he worked on the solution to their problem, and Tony had the pleasure of blasting all the not so tiny green fuckers to bits with Rhodey and Sam. They had a pretty good system going on, Tony was proud to admit.

The one good thing about this guy being obsessed with Bruce was that he had “borrowed” from a lot of his original work, so it was easy for Bruce to find a way to disable all these monsters. They were going to draw them all into one city block and, after Bruce finished making some adjustments to one of the units that kept creating them, using a very specific frequency of Gamma rays, wipe ‘em all out at once.

Tony had done the math in his head, and he concluded that it was gonna be fucking awesome.

“Tony!” Bruce’s voice caught Tony’s attention over the coms. “I’ve got everything ready on this end, are we ready to end this?” He asked.

“Hold up, how much property damage are we gonna have on our hands when this is all said and done?” Rhodey asked. “I’ve got Damage Control breathing down my neck for an estimate.” Though no one could see it, Tony rolled his eyes. They really couldn’t wait until the city wasn’t in danger anymore?

“This entire block at least, maybe a bit further down,” Bruce called back. “That’s about as good of an estimate as they’re gonna get from us right now.”

“Can we stop the chit chat and get to finishing this already?” Sam called out, clearly annoyed as one of the larger monsters pinned him against an apartment complex. Rhodey managed to blast the thing into a puff of green smoke and goop, earning a sighed “Gross,” from the other man, the structural integrity of the building taking the fault for the shock wave.

“Yeah, I left ice cream in my car for this!” Clint added.

“As long as I get the okay from Cap and Spider-Man, I’m ready to blow this popsicle stand!” Bruce yelled out, and it took everything inside of Tony not to fly over to Banner and slap him. And he calls Tony a dad, come on!

“Please, for the love of God don’t ever say that again, or I will vomit.” Tony warned, making fake gagging noises as the rest of his teammates groaned along with him. “And trust me, cleaning puke out of one of these suits is not easy.”

“Fellas, you can fool around all you want after we save the city.” Natasha interrupted sternly. “Spider-Man, Captain, we good to go?”

“We’ve done our part, Natasha,” Steve declared. “Let’s finish these green bastards.” At any other time Tony would’ve shot a gasp and a sarcastic “Language!” towards Cap, but something wasn’t right.

“Cap, is Peter with you? Pete, do you copy?” Tony asked. Peter was never one to go silent over the coms, if anything he would talk over them too much.

“He ran off somewhere, he’s not with you?” Cap questioned back, his voice sounding fuzzy and out of focus in his ear. Tony felt panic rise in his chest.

“Alright guys, I’m firing this thing up, everybody stand clear!” Bruce called out, the power of whatever device Bruce had whipped up interfering with their communication lines.

“Peter?” Tony called again. “Bruce, wait we can’t find Peter!” Tony called, but it was too late. Bruce hadn’t heard him and the machine had already warmed up. Tony watched in horror from high over the city block as a glowing green light emerged from the center of the street, Nat driving Bruce and Clint to safety above the device on a hoverbike.

Tony’s heart stopped when his com buzzed to life one final time before the blast wave rippled through the city.

“I repeat, I have a little girl in a collapsing building, do not start that thing up! Does anyone copy? Hello?!”

But by then it was too late.

Tony had to close his eyes, the blast was so powerful and bright, knocking him off his balance momentarily. A pulse was sent through the air, and by the time the light had disappeared the area below him was filling with smoke from the surrounding structures beginning to collapse. Without hesitation, Tony started rocketing down into the destruction, the once familiar city block now resembling a dystopian YA novel setting. Tony flew around, taking a frantic minute to try and regain his barings.

“Friday? Friday, get me heat signatures, now!” Tony yelled when he found his voice again, knowing until the smoke cleared his eyes would be useless. “Peter?!”

“Two heat signatures in this building to your left, boss.” Friday replied, the AI sounding nervous. Tony turned, a shiver shooting through his body when his eyes met the giant pile of destruction. He raced towards it without so much as a second thought, all but crashing into the rubble, anxiety coursing through his veins.

“Peter, do you copy?” Tony asked sternly and slowly, making his voice as clear as he could manage.

“Mr. Stark?” Peter’s voice came through the line fuzzy, but it was his voice nonetheless. He heard Peter coughing in his ear as the smoke and dust surrounding Tony began to clear.

“Pete! Pete, Peter, are you hurt?” Tony asked. “Friday, can you get me his vitals?”

“Mr. Stark, I’m fine, but I’m not alone.” Peter explained.

“Is that Iron Man?” The voice of a starstruck young girl rang through Tony’s ears. Tony’s heart clenched. He couldn’t freak out now, not with two kids in danger.

“This is Iron Man,” Tony confirmed in as calm a voice as he could manage. “Who’s this?”

“This is Sara, Spider-Man gave me his mask to wear!” The little girl announced excitedly.

“She needs the oxygen,” Peter explained. “Karen scanned our pocket, we’re sealed in airtight.” Peter paused to cough, weaker than before. “I hope you’re working on a way to get us out of here, Karen says we’ve only got about eight minutes of oxygen in here.” He paused for just a second too long. “Correction; I’ve only got eight minutes of oxygen in here.”

“Can you send me the scan?” Tony asked. Five seconds later a scan was popping up in the corner of his eye, and he stood stunned for a moment as the reality of the situation sank in.

The length of the pocket of rubble Peter and this little girl were in left very little space to be desired. Peter was on his side, his arm protectively around the little girl, holding one of her small hands, one leg bent as if he had hunched himself around her as protection, but the other.. “Peter when were you going to tell me your leg is being crushed under a building?” Tony was restraining from yelling and swearing as best he could. He heard Peter chuckle weakly

“Surprise.” His voice was already growing weak. Tony turned away from the building to see the rest of the team approaching him. Rhodey was the first to speak.

“Damage Control is gonna be here in twenty minutes.” He offered. “That’s as fast as they can get here.” Tony immediately flew up into the air, the sound of Peter coughing weakly in his ear burning in his chest.

“Well you tell them twenty minutes is gonna be too late, we need them here now!” Tony yelled as he started blasting at the building with his repulsors. He looked down at the rest of his teammates. “Don’t just stand there we need to get these kids out!”

“Mr. Stark, the suit has enough oxygen for two hours, that’s your time frame.” Peter explained. “Sara is gonna be safe here until then.” Tony only added more power to his blasting.

“Yeah and what about you, Peter? Leaving you down there isn’t an option, kid.” Tony stated firmly.

“Mr. Stark, spiders can survive days without oxygen I’m sure I’ll-” Peter started to explain before Tony cut him off.

“Yeah and you’re not a spider, are you? No, you’re still a human, and humans need oxygen! We’re not discussing this. We’re getting both of you out of there in time.” Tony moved closer to the building when he noticed how little his repulsors were doing to destroy the rubble. “C’mon Friday,” Tony whispered to himself, frustrated. “I need more juice.”

“Boss, there’s not enough power left in the suit do any real damage, there’s just too much here.” Friday said. Tony felt his stomach drop, swearing despite knowing a little kid was listening to him.

“Can we try digging them out?” Tony asked as Friday scanned the building.

“We can try, but they were on the third floor when the building collapsed, they’ve got about 100 feet of rubble on top of and surrounding them, boss.” Tony started running calculations in his head as Friday kept talking. “We won’t be able to reach them in the remaining six minutes fifty seconds.” Tony knew the math, but he wasn’t accepting that as an answer. Man, where was Thor when you needed him? The fucking wizard even, or a-

“We may not be able to, but I know someone who might..” Tony muttered to himself in realization. He flew back down to the ground, finding Bruce among the debris on the street with Clint and Natasha. “Banner, if we’re gonna get to Peter in time we could really use a Hulk.” Banner nodded. “Clint, take Nat and Sam and see if you can clear the roads enough for damage control to get to us. I’ll stay here with Rhodey and Cap.” Everyone nodded in agreement to the plan and set off to work.

“And here I was thinking Bruce was gonna save the day for once.” Bruce chuckled before he transformed into the Hulk. Tony managed to get his attention before he went bezerk.

“Hulk, this is a rescue mission, okay? Spider-Man is trapped under that building with a little girl.” Tony began to lay out the situation. “We need your muscle, but you have to be careful not to trap them under there, you got that?” Hulk nodded down at Tony.

“Hulk won’t hurt little spider or little girl.” He replied, almost solemnly. Tony nodded back as the Hulk lept into action, helping Cap and Rhodey remove wreckage in an attempt to get to Peter and Sara. Tony was right behind him. They all threw themselves into trying to dig Peter and the little girl out of the wrecked apartment, and after a minute of or two of silence on the other end of the coms, Tony spoke up.

“Spider-Man? How’re we holding up, kid?” Tony asked, his voice unsure and strained.

“Spider-Man said he’s sleepy.” Sara replied, causing everyone to pause and pass around a worried look before throwing themselves into working harder.

“Sara, is Spider-Man still awake?” Steve asked, grunting as he yanked at the pile in front of him.

“Just tryin’ to conserve... oxygen.” Peter mumbled, his breathing already becoming shallow. Tony bit his lip. This wasn’t good.

“The pocket you two are in, how structurally sound is it?” Rhodey asked.

“It’s uh…” Peter took a long pause to try and catch his breath, which did nothing to calm Tony in the slightest. “We’re under a.. Jus’ a big slab of concrete… Tilted.. Karen doesn’t think it’ll… It’ll fall in on us…”  Peter coughed weakly again.

“His air’s filling up with CO2 fast, boss.” Friday informed Tony, quietly. ”He doesn’t have a lot of time.” Tony swore under his breath, quiet enough that no one heard him.

“Sara? Can I ask you something?” Tony asked as he and Steve removed a support beam from the rubble in front of them.

“Hi Iron Man!” The little girl replied, and Tony’s heart began to hurt. He knew Peter was keeping her calm under there, and he was so damn proud.

“I need you to keep an eye on Spider-Man for me, okay? If he falls asleep, if he starts changing colours, if he sprouts some new spider legs, I want you to let me know right away, okay?” The question was a serious one, but was trying his best to keep the little girl calm. He heard her giggle in affirmation.

“I promise!”

Tony heard faint sirens getting louder, he was so focused on trying to clear a way to rescue Peter and the girl, he hadn’t noticed Nat, Clint and Sam rushing over to them, damage control close behind. He breathed out a sigh of relief.

“Spidey, you still with us? Damage control is here, you still breathing?” Tony ask urgently as Steve greeted damage control with their current situation.

“Air’s… Air’s gettin’ thin, Tony…” Peter gasped, and Tony knew he was in trouble when Peter didn’t refer to him as ‘Mr. Stark’. Poor kid probably didn’t have enough air to, nor did he sound at all uncomfortable using his mentor’s first name. Also not a good sign.

“It’s okay, Pete, we’ll get you out soon..” Tony said, backing away from what was left of the building and worriedly looking at how little progress the four of them had made. “Friday, how much oxygen does he have left?” Tony asked, not ready for the answer to his question. He kept backing away, trying to distance himself from the answer.

“About a minute and thirty seconds, if my data from Karen is correct.” Friday replied, her tone somber. She said the one thing Tony wasn’t yet ready to admit. “They aren’t going to reach him in time, boss.” Tony looked over the collapsed apartment building, damage control already pulling the rubble apart with their big machines, tools that were much more well equipped to deal with this kind of thing than his suit was. Tony did his best to choke back a sob.

“Pete? Pete, Damage control is working on getting you two out of there as we speak, okay? You’ve just gotta hang on.” Peter let out a tired chuckle.

“We..” He sassed, a grin prominent in his voice. The sob Tony was holding back escaped him as a half laugh. Peter coughed quietly. “Jus’ make sure… Sara…. ‘s out..” Peter coughed weakly again, and at this point coughing was a reassuring noise.

“We will, kid. Sara’s gonna be safe, don’t worry.” Tony reassured, knowing the little girl could hear him. “Both of you are gonna get out safe, we just need you to hang on a little bit longer, kid, please.” His voice was unsteady, afraid he wasn’t telling the truth.

“No.. no one else g-uh-ot… Huhh, hurt, ‘ight?” Peter asked desperately between wheezing gasps, pain evident in his voice for the first time. “We.. we got ev’yone.. Ngh… Out?” The fact that Peter was even asking that question right now made Tony want to scream.

Instead he just tried his best to pretend he couldn’t hear the sound of Peter’s airways seizing up.

“No one else got hurt.” Tony reaffirmed, his head rolling, not sure whether to nod or shake his head. “You and Cap did a great job. You did us all proud, Spider-Man.” Tony heard Peter chuckle, trying to hide a moan of discomfort.

“..I...I’love you... T-uh..Tony…” Tony could hear Peter’s breathless voice straining, trying to make his words clear, his statement sounding more like a question. More like a cry for help.

Tony was about to lose it.

“Tell me that when you’re out here breathing fresh air, kid.” Tony responded, absentmindedly wrapping his arms around himself. “Kid?”

“.. Spider-Man went to sleep.” Sara informed Tony. “And his hand is getting cold.”

“Is he holding your hand?” Tony asked, tears now pricking his eyes but somehow restabilizing his voice for the young girl’s sake.

“He’s always been holding my hand.” Sara replied, a smile evident in her voice. Tony smiled too, wide, feeling the tears slide down his cheeks.

“You... I.. I want you to keep holding his hand, okay? In case he wakes up, so he knows you’re still safe with him, alright?” Tony requested. “And you’ll let me know if anything else changes, won’t you?”

“Of course Iron Man!” The little girl giggled. “I promised! And you’re not supposed to break promises!” Tony shook his head.

“No, you’re not. You’re a very smart little girl, Sara.” Sara giggled out a thank you. Tony wasn’t sure how he was still talking, his body must’ve gone on autopilot. For the sake of the girl. “We’ll have you and Spider-Man out of there really soon, okay? You just keep holding his hand.”

It ended up taking around twenty minutes to find them.

After Peter had gone silent, Tony had pretty much checked out from the rescue mission mentally, his body simply doing whatever it was told to do to help. Steve and Natasha took over talking with Sara. Which at first was odd to everyone. Tony is usually very good at keeping people calm in these types of situations, kids especially, but in those moments he just couldn’t seem to find that in him.

But this time things were completely different. Because this time he was sure that he’d just lost his own fucking kid, and he was powerless to do anything about it.

Sara’s only update on Peter had been that he was starting to turn blue in his sleep. Natasha was quick to make a reference to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and asked Sara to keep an eye out if Spider-Man started to inflate like a big blueberry.

Each breath Tony took felt like betrayal.

When they were finally found, it felt like everything started moving in slow motion. Paramedics rushed up past him onto the mountain of rubble, carrying their bags and their stretchers, ready to help.

They pulled Sara up first.

Tony got his first glimpse of how Peter had saved her life. His Spider-Man mask was over her head, long auburn hair and a tube leading into Peter’s suit peeking out underneath it. Tony’s mind was suddenly back in his lab with Peter, remembering Peter had made the suggestion to make the oxygen tube to the headpiece adjustable in the first place. Such a small detail at the time, now had saved a little girl’s life.

Upon one of the paramedics removing the mask, the face of a bright green eyed girl was visible. Her hair was messy from wearing the mask, her pale face, red chubby cheeks and nose covered in freckles. She was reaching down to the pit she had just been pulled out of, worry present in her body language and written on her face. Tony wanted to move, wanted to go and help, but he felt completely frozen in place. He wanted to ask Friday if there was some kind of electrical issue with the suit, but his mouth wouldn’t work, either.

It took them eight minutes more to get Peter out.

Because his leg was trapped under more rubble, everyone had to get clear of the structure and the machines had to be brought back in so they could free him. Once they had gotten his leg free, three paramedics jumped down into the hole to get him out.

At this point the little girl was long gone in an ambulance to the local hospital, but Tony hadn’t noticed. His vision was hyper focused on the three heads bobbing up and down, shouting commands and stats at each other Tony wasn’t present enough to try and understand.

“Tony?” It was Bruce that finally tethered Tony back to his body. Hulk was gone, for how long Tony couldn’t know. Long enough for Bruce to redress and recompose himself. He felt Bruce tap lightly on his chest plate, and Tony’s suit was opening up before Tony realized he had opened it. If it wasn’t for Bruce standing right next to him, he would’ve fallen flat on his face. He leaned into his friend, draping one arm around his neck in some sort of desperate hug as he kept reminding himself to breathe.

“He’s.. What’s his… Is he..?” Tony tried to speak, tried to ask if Peter was okay, but his mouth seemed disconnected from his brain.

“They have cars waiting for us, Tony. We’re gonna meet them at the hospital, okay?” Bruce explained, slowly and clearly. Tony still couldn’t pull his eyes away from where Peter was. What the hell was taking them so damn long?

“We.. Why can’t..?” Tony made another unsuccessful attempt at asking a question as Bruce started leading Tony to a now cleared street where cars and emergency vehicles were waiting. “I wanna ride with him.”

“You’ll be able to see him when we get to the hospital, Tony.” Bruce reassured. Tony tripped, once again being saved from falling on his face by Bruce, his panicked gaze falling to the concrete below him as he tried to regain his balance. A gagged breath escaped his lips as he tried to regain his footing, feeling as if the entire world was quaking below him. Bruce helped Tony stand up straight and he started walking again, but what Tony saw in the corner of his eye made him stop dead in his tracks.

Peter, lying lifelessly on a stretcher, surrounded by medical personnel as they wheeled him towards one of many ambulances. He had a brace holding together what Tony knew was a completely shattered leg, and another round his neck. Someone had a bag valve mask pressed to his face, pumping air into his lungs. His face some ungodly shade of blue/grey.

He looked dead.

“He’ll be okay, Tony.” Bruce supplied, pulling Tony’s gaze back to him. “Tony listen to me, he’s gonna be fine.” Tony’s eyes darted back and forth between Bruce’s concerned face, and Peter being loaded into an ambulance. He looked back to his friend, falling further into his embrace as the full weight of the situation finally slammed into him. He didn’t need Friday to do the math for him. He locked eyes with Bruce once again, the familiar sensation of tears sliding down his cheeks.

“No,” His whole body was shaking, “He won’t be.”

[ld9-writers-block-blog]

Here Are 6 Things Your Cat Loves More Than Food

We as a whole realize exactly how much felines like nourishment. Indeed, even stray felines who might rather not come quite close to a human can for the most part be allured with the guarantee of a delicious piece.

Nonetheless, there are a couple of things that even your feline likes more than nourishment. In the event that you recognize what they are and give them, you'll have one VERY cheerful kitty.

Here are six things your feline will pick over nourishment… pretty much inevitably.

1. Snoozes

In the event that your feline is in any way similar to mine, the sound of a stirring sack of nourishment can wake them out of the most profound rest. Different felines could mind less. They'd much rather complete their feline rests and eat later. Essentially, it descends to your feline's close to home inclinations. Consider it. What do you discover your feline investing the majority of their energy doing? In the event that I needed to figure, it would rest. In actuality, felines can spend upwards of 12 to 16 hours rest every day. What's more, if your feline is more established, they could rest as much as 20 hours every day. That doesn't leave much time to do quite a bit of something else, isn't that right?

2. Catnip

Given a decision between a bowl of nourishment and a BIG heap of catnip, what might your feline pick? All things considered, its an obvious fact that felines love catnip, and numerous felines would significantly lean toward you give them catnip instead of treats. That is to say, wouldn't you? Simply consider it, on the off chance that you had the decision between a treat or a substance that made you feel quite great each time you had it… what might you pick?

3. Hair Comfort

Have you at any point watched a feline eat? On the off chance that you have, at that point possibly you've seen them eating out of the center of the bowl, while keeping away from the sides. However, after they've completed, they ask as though they haven't had a thing to eat. What's gives? Indeed, a few felines have VERY delicate hairs. What's more, contacting them on anything is to some degree awkward. That is on the grounds that, stubbles are intended to help felines discover predators and prey, identify changes in the climate, and they even enable them to discover their way around in obscurity. Which as you can envision, makes them extremely delicate. Truth be told, harm to their bristles can be very difficult. That is the reason Rubbing against the side of the bowl can be awkward to your feline. What's more, felines with touchy stubbles will dependably pick the solace of their hairs over nourishment. Also they realize that when they get extremely eager a bit of asking goes far.

4. Working For Food

I realize it might sound abnormal, however most felines would prefer to work for their nourishment than have it quite recently given to them. Keep in mind, felines have extremely solid impulses, in addition to they're very brilliant. Along these lines, for them, it's a diversion. They like the test and they want to follow things down. Particularly, indoor felines. Without incitement they get exhausted, so making a diversion out of supper time can be very thrilling. There are an assortment of riddle feeders that can help make every dinner quite a lot more fun. You can likewise play recreations with your feline, train them traps and shroud their nourishment in better places.

5. A Stimulating Environment

Much the same as chasing for nourishment invigorates a feline's brain, your feline likes to be animated in different ways as well. Presently, I'll be the first to concede that I keep my feline inside in light of the fact that I like to guard him. In any case, while guarding your feline from predators, vehicles and different risky and unsafe dangers, there are medical issues related with keeping your feline inside. For instance, urinary tract contaminations, diabetes, and heftiness. Much the same as you and I, felines need both physical and mental incitement. Felines need to climb, hop and play. In this way, giving your feline an assortment of roosts, boxes, windows and different spots, they can go to play and watch feathered creatures will go far in keeping them animated and will help check their fatigue.

6. You

Presently you might not have anticipated this one but rather trust it or not… your feline favors you over nourishment. It's hard to believe, but it's true… felines love their people and ache for your consideration. In one investigation performed at Oregon State University specialists found that felines incline toward social association to sustenance. The examination took a gander at the conduct of both pet felines and felines living in a safe house. Amid the examination, they gave the felines a decision between sustenance, toys, fragrances and social association with a human. And keeping in mind that there were contrasts among every one of the felines, the lion's share liked to connect with people more than everything else. So next time your feline appears laser-concentrated on their sustenance dish as they swallow down the nourishment you've given them take comfort in realizing that your feline cherishes you more than sustenance.

How Cats Age

You generally find out about puppies and maturing. You know…

How 1 human year is equivalent to 7 hound years. However, shouldn't something be said about felines?

What does the maturing procedure look like for them? Furthermore, as a feline proprietor what would you be able to expect as they develop from little cat to grown-up feline and past.

All things considered, that is actually what this article is about.

The rate at which your feline ages can rely upon an assortment of variables including their general wellbeing and the earth they are brought up in.

I've assembled some broad rules regarding what you can expect at the different stages.

Most specialists concur, there are six phases of maturing. Thus, I've condensed every one of them underneath.

1. Cat Stage (this stage speaks to the time from birth until they are around a half year old)

It's basically amid this phase your feline will change the most, both physically and rationally than at some other time in their life. In this way, much can occur so rapidly, that it's vital to realize what to search for to decide if your feline is growing ordinarily, and is turning into a very much adjusted, sound and certain feline.

How about we take a gander at a couple of the most imperative things.

Nourishment - Kittens are a ton like developing kids and it's vital that amid this time you feed them a lot of amazing, supplement thick little cat sustenance. On the off chance that you've at any point possessed a feline, at that point you definitely realize how finicky they can be. On the off chance that your little cat turns their nose up to a specific kind of sustenance, attempt to offer them nourishments with various surfaces. This can frequently work until you discover a surface that they like.

Socialization During these developmental years, it's imperative to open your feline to an assortment of circumstances and individuals. Simply make sure to do it in a way where they realize that you're there and they realize they are sheltered. On the off chance that you alarm them or on the off chance that they partner someone in particular or circumstance with dread, at that point it might be difficult to break that affiliation sometime down the road. This is likewise a decent time to get them used to the feline bearer and the vehicle, for those future treks to the vet. Likewise, ensure they get a lot of play time both with people and different pets on the off chance that you have any. This is a decent time to likewise open them to different creatures, particularly hounds.

Litterbox – This is likewise when your feline will figure out how to utilize the litter box. Fortunately most felines lift it up before long. Simply make a point to put it in a region where they can without much of a stretch discover it and a territory that feels safe.

2. Junior (amid this stage felines are reproductively develop however are as yet developing, this stage normally endures amid the initial 1-2 years)

Amid this stage, felines are a ton like young people. They're investigating their condition and endeavoring to get a sense with respect to where they have a place. Amid this stage, your feline will achieve their full size and will have figured out how to endure and flourish in their condition. They can likewise turn into somewhat gutsy and minimal progressively inquisitive as their certainty develops.

Junior felines will ordinarily show these practices:

Meandering – Cats at this phase who aren't spayed or fixed have a propensity for pondering. This is an impulse that they are brought into the world with and it can get them in a bad position. In a perfect world, you've spayed or fixed your feline as a cat, yet on the off chance that you haven't presently is as yet a decent time.

Litterbox – Now that you know how huge your feline will be, ensure their litter box is sufficiently enormous for them. Likewise, ensure that they are utilizing it fittingly and that there are no issues with its arrangement.

The following stage is…

3. The Adult Stage (this stage is spoken to by your feline being in a mind-blowing prime physically and for the most part happens between the ages of 3 and 6)

At this point you have an entirely decent handle on who your feline is, the thing that their identity is and what their fundamental demeanor is.

As a grown-up, your feline's needs will change. For instance:

Conduct and exercises During the grown-up stage, your feline won't be as dynamic as they were the point at which they were a cat, yet despite everything they need standard exercise and play time. They likewise need mental incitement and some social time as well.

Medicinal needs Hopefully you've been taking your feline to the vet for standard checkups since they were a little cat, if not right now is an ideal opportunity to focus on their wellbeing including their weight and dental cleanliness.

Next up is the…

4. Develop Stage (This stage is normally characterized between the ages of 7-10 years of age)

Amid this stage, it's critical to remember that felines are what could be compared to around 40-50 years old. They're less dynamic than your run of the mill grown-up feline as well. Furthermore, in view of how well you dealt with their wellbeing needs amid their grown-up years, medical problems may start to spring up. At this stage, it truly is suggested that you bring your feline into the vet at any rate on a yearly premise. That way, your vet can distinguish any creating medical problems like joint inflammation, weight or dental issues, which are progressively normal amid this stage.

The following stage is the…

5. Senior Stage (this stage commonly happens between the ages of 11-14 years)

This is equal to what we people think about our brilliant years. Amid this stage, felines will frequently rest more and eat less. They likewise don't play as much as they used to either.

6. Geriatric Stage (This stage is typically defined as 15 years and beyond)

Unfortunately, this stage is associated with mounting health issues. And during this time of your cat’s life, I recommend you take your cat in twice a year for checkups. Health problems can come on quickly and you want to make sure that you catch things early. During this stage, you’ll also want to keep your cat comfortable and loved. Giving your pet the best care also means recognizing when it may be time to say goodbye. I hope you’re lucky enough to have a cat through all of these stages.

[dentalinfotoday]

Someone once said, “Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.” How true!  While it can be frustrating to watch your health change as you age, you don’t have to accept poor oral health and tooth loss as just an inevitable part of the aging process. Your oral health is just as important now as it has ever been, and it has a great deal to do with your overall health and wellness. When it comes to senior dentistry and oral health, Dr. Paini shares the top concerns you may have, and how to address them.

Gum Disease

A shocking 70% of adults over 65 years of age have gum disease, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Gum disease is the leading cause of tooth loss among seniors. Gum disease is your body’s way of trying to kill germs that infect and inflame gum tissues.  Chronic exposure to inflammation in the body quadruples your chance of developing Alzheimer’s later in life, according to the American Dental Association.

Tooth Loss & Replacement

After your baby teeth are gone, you only get one adult set of teeth to last the rest of your life. Preventing gum disease and oral cancer will boost your chances of keeping your natural teeth for as long as possible, hopefully for life.  You don’t want to lose your teeth – and you don’t have to!

Even with the most diligent oral hygiene, tooth loss is very common and nothing to be ashamed of. Tooth replacement options have improved greatly with current advances in restorative dentistry. Depending on your individual case, bridges, dentures, or dental implants may be able to restore your smile back to its full, healthy condition, allowing you to eat, speak, and enjoy life with ease. These dental enhancements will need to be cleaned and cared for in similar ways to your natural teeth, and your dentist can help you make the adjustment to caring for them properly.

If a full life has aged your smile, you may also be interested in veneers, which instantly and easily give you a youthful smile again.

Oral Cancer

People over 40 years of age have a much higher risk of developing oral cancer. Seeing the dentist twice a year and receiving regular oral cancer screenings is very helpful for detecting early signs for your best chance at survival and recovery. Prevent oral cancer by quitting (or never starting) tobacco and alcohol. These substances are not healthy for the cells in your mouth (or any other part of your body).

Dry Mouth

Diabetes and some medications can cause dry mouth (xerostomia). Saliva is very important for keeping your mouth healthy and functioning. Dry mouth is common and can lead to increased tooth decay. Talk to your Denver dentist if your mouth feels drier than it should, and drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.

Complications

Poor oral health can increase your risk of heart disease and diabetes, and some older adults struggle with caring for their oral health with everyday hygiene like brushing and flossing. Your dentist cares about every aspect of your health and can help you come up with a plan to improve your overall health and wellness. Be sure to share all your health concerns anytime you see the dentist.

The Dentist Still Wants to See You!

Taking care of your teeth is important at every age. Kids from 1 to 92 should:

Brush your teeth twice a day

Floss once a day

Visit the dentist twice a year

Eat a healthy diet and make sugary snacks a rare treat

Avoid problematic substances like coffee, tea, alcohol, and nicotine

Your oral health can positively (or negatively) impact your overall health; it also can serve as a mirror to reflect problems going on elsewhere in your body. Caring for your teeth, gums, and mouth will increase the likelihood that your body remains strong and vital during a season of life with so much to look forward to.

Make an appointment today at Advanced Aesthetic Dentistry in Denver for the most comprehensive dental care so you can enjoy the golden years with a healthy smile!

The content of this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of qualified health providers with questions you may have regarding medical conditions.

Sources

http://www.colgate.com/en/us/oc/oral-health/life-stages/oral-care-age-55-up

http://www.webmd.com/oral-health/news/20051111/9-risk-factors-for-tooth-loss

from Advanced Aesthetic Dentistry https://www.ddsdenver.com/senior-dentistry-embrace-healthy-aging/

[roseonhissleeve]

Ache

REQUEST: so i know you're not taking requests, but i would die die die and love love love a fic with harry as a med student who realizes he's in love with his best friends little sister (and they've all grown up their whole lives together really close) super specific i know, but we all have those tropes that we love haha

A/N: Kind of changed this around, I hope that’s okay! I might do another part to this eventually if there’s interest. All the love. xx

TW: cancer death. 

You and Harry were never really all that close growing up.

You only knew him as your brother’s best friend. Granted, you thought that he was great— he had come over to enough family dinners and holidays for you to know that he was incredibly funny, and extremely talented. He was there at the dinner table when you announced that you were going to med school. He was there when you came back for Christmas and Thanksgiving, and even occasionally when you skyped your brother from college. He was more family member than anything, even though you two had never really had that deep of a connection.

You never expected him to be the one that was there for you on that day.

It was on the fourth day of your internship in the surgical wing. You’d been up for about forty-six hours, with a few cat naps here and there and more cups of coffee than you could remember. And you lived for it— you lived for the rush of running down hospital wings, you lived for the look on a loved one’s face when they were told that the patient would make a full recovery. You loved the puzzle, the riddle, everything about the game.

Until you didn’t.

He was nine years old. The little boy with brain cancer was nine years old.

You first checked up on him during your morning rounds. His BP was low, and his test results left much to be desired. He was asleep when you walked into the room— the heart monitor beeped constantly as you checked his vitals, mulling about the space as quietly as you could. Nico, the clipboard stated as his name, and you went about your business and slipped out of the room to let him sleep. You remember thinking it was odd that he didn’t have any parent there.

The second time you checked up on him was three hours later. You caught a glance at him when you walked by his doorway— he was sitting up in bed, the bags in his eyes as dark as you could imagine. Nevertheless he was playing with a toy truck, his food sitting on the tray next to his bed.

You knocked on the door lightly, a smile coloring your lips.

“Hey, buddy,” you said, watching as he looked up in your direction.

“Hi,” he croaked, his voice weaker than you expected. It took you back for a second, and you took a few steps into the room before speaking again.

“What’s your name?” You asked, despite knowing it already.

“Nico,” he replied, his blue eyes big and captivating. His skin was pale and gleaming with sweat, but his eyes were filled with more life than ever.

“Nice to meet you, my name’s Y/N. Is it okay if I check your vitals?” You asked. He nodded softly, turning his attention back to his truck, and you milled about the room doing your work gently. He barely flinched when you put the stethoscope to his back, and you realized that he must have been here for a while.

“Where are your parents, Nico?” You asked, adjusting the stethoscope around your neck as you glanced up at the monitors, looking for any irregular numbers.

“Mom’s at work,” he admitted, and the way he said it made you realize that dad wasn’t in the picture. “She comes whenever she can, but she doesn’t have a lot of time to catch the train between her jobs.”

You swallowed thickly, immediately regretting asking the question. You forced a smile on your face as you looked at his thin features, making a mental note to come check back in on him later.

“I’ll bring you a pudding cup next time, okay? What’s your favorite flavor?”

“Chocolate,” he said with a thin grin, his top tooth missing.

“Chocolate it is,” you confirmed, shooting him a wink before turning around and leaving to continue your rounds.

The next time you walked past his door, there was a chocolate pudding cup in your pocket.

And there were five doctors in the room.

“There must be something we can do…”

“This poor kid’s mother is working three jobs, for Christ sakes.”

“Has someone called her?”

“I couldn’t get through to her.”

“Well try again, for fuck sakes.”

“Dr. Bell?” Your voice interrupted the slurry of physician’s words, causing everyone to glance over at you. You made eye contact with your assigned resident, swallowing thickly before speaking again. “What’s going on?”

The young woman’s lower lip trembled a little bit, and you could tell that she was fighting to hold it together. There was a look in her eyes that you hadn’t seen yet, as if this was something that she hadn’t meant for you to face so soon.

“Y/N, I…” she began, closing her eyes briefly as she tried to find the words. “The patient...Nico, well, we’re afraid his time is up. There’s...there’s nothing else we can do for him.”

The words sunk in slowly, one by one, like slowly peeling off a band-aid.

“We’re trying to contact his mother, but we know that she works long hours and has four other children but...we thought she’d want to be here to hold him,” she finished, tears in her eyes for the first time since you’d met her. You came to the conclusion that this job must never get easier.

“I’ll sit with him,” you said immediately, your voice unwavering.

“Are you...Y/N, you don’t have to— ”

“I want to,” you asserted, walking further into the room. You took a seat next to the bed as your eyes fell upon the little boys features— cold and hard, yet soft all at once. “If that’s what he needs right now, if that’s what you’re all looking for, I’ll do it.”

There was a long pause in the room as you reached to take Nico’s hand in yours, surprised at the cold sensation of it. That feeling would haunt you for the rest of your life.

“I’ll...get someone to cover the rest of your rounds,” Dr. Bell said, glancing around at the other physicians before gesturing for them to leave you and your patient alone.

You sat, and you sat, and you waited. You held his little hand in yours and rubbed it between your palms, bringing it up to your lips and blowing hot air on them in an attempt to warm him. It didn’t work, no matter how many times you did it. You ran your fingers through his hair and almost shivered at the way his unmoving body felt beneath your fingertips, the feeling like an unwanted houseguest creeping under your skin.

By the time the monitor made that slow, single, monotone beep, you felt numb.

*

Harry was just going to drop his spare house key off at his mate’s house and leave. He was going away on a trip and wanted someone to water his plants, as weird and adult as that sounded to him. So he lifted the mat and revealed the hidden key that his best friend thought would never be found by an unwelcome guest (even though it was more cliche than he could ever imagine), and he let himself in.

He whistled softly as he walked into the hallway and set his key on the counter at the end of the hall. He was about to turn around and walk back out when he heard it— the sound of someone retching, as if they were about to throw up.

“Hello?” Harry called out, furrowing his brows as he walked down towards the bathroom door. He was half expecting to see his mate, but his eyes widened when he saw that it was you.

“Y/N?” He murmured softly, lips turning downward with concern. You were still in your scrubs from your shift earlier that day, your hair pulled up in a tangled messy bun that had long since partly fallen out. Your face was pale and your entire body was shaking, your white sneakers resting against the bright pink tile of the bathroom as you held your head in your hands.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Harry cooed, immediately kneeling down on the ground in front of you. He could see it register on your features when you realized it was him— your face softened slightly and your eyes began to water all over again. You couldn’t fake it around Harry. There was something about him that made the truth spill out.

“I can’t— I can’t do it, I can’t Harry, I can’t do it anymore, I’m not made for this,” you rambled quickly, your head shaking as you covered your eyes with the palms of your hands and choked on a sob. You couldn’t get the feeling of that little boy’s cold hand out of your head, seeping in like rainwater through a wall.

“What can’t you do, love? What’s going on?” Harry asked, reaching to brush a lock of your hair behind your ear. He felt the desire in his chest to hold you so desperately, and he didn’t know where it was coming from.

You told him everything. Between the sobs and the hiccups and the tears, you told him about the little boy in the hospital that day, the one that died alone without his mother or any of his family. The one who’s pudding cup was still in your locker at work because you couldn’t bear to throw it out, because every time you tried to the feeling of his hand in yours would tie it to you like an anchor to the bottom of the ocean.

“I just felt so helpless, Harry, it was...it was the worst feeling I’ve ever felt in my entire life,” you concluded, your face bright red and your eyes stinging as you looked at him. “I never want to feel that way ever again.”

Harry’s own eyes threatened to fill with tears at the sight of you like this— the only other time he’d ever seen you this upset was when you broke up with your long term boyfriend on Christmas two years ago. And even then, it wasn’t like this. Back then you didn’t look so...broken.

Oh, how he wished he could put you back together.

“C’mere,” he murmured softly, opening his arms as he leaned back onto the tile to sit on his behind. You sniffled as you crawled towards him, and you found that you fit against his chest easily. His arms wound around your frame strongly, pulling you against this chest and tucking your head under his chin. He smelled faintly of soap, aftershave, and Tom Ford cologne, and the scent made your head spin and your muscles relax. You felt his chest vibrate slightly as he hummed, closing your eyes and letting yourself be taken care of.

“You have to do this,” he whispered, and you suddenly realized that his lips were against the top of your head. “You have to do this, Y/N, because I know you. I know that you were meant to do this...we need doctors like you. Doctors who don’t just see it as a way to earn a paycheque— ones who will stop to ask a sick boy what his favorite pudding is. One who will spend their time holding someone’s hand during that last moment, because it’s just as important as the ones you spend saving someone. You...you saved that little boy, Y/N. In some way, somehow, you saved him. You did.”

The way you saved me, he wanted to say, but he simply closed his eyes and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. He had been there alongside you as you grew, and he had always known there was something special about you— you had this light in your eyes and in the way you treated people that made him feel like the world wasn’t hopeless.

Like he wasn’t hopeless.

And maybe he should have realized that sooner, and maybe it shouldn’t have taken him finding you on a bedroom floor for him to realize that he loved you. But lord, did he ever love you. It hit him like a strike of thunder, and left him shaken to the core.

And all the meanwhile, you found yourself surprised at how easy it was to fit into his arms. You wondered if he always knew exactly what to say, and you realized that Harry was a bigger part of your life than you’d ever imagined.

He was the one who quizzed you for seven hours straight when you were studying for your MCATs. He was the first one you called when you passed them. Harry picked you up from your prom when your date showed up drunk and your brother was too busy to, and he took you out for ice cream afterwards and made you laugh about it. He was there with your family at your high school graduation even though he had graduated two years earlier, and when you got sick and your parents were out of town he cooked dinner for you for three days.

And suddenly you realized that Harry had been there for you in more ways than once.

And you were in love with him.

You tucked yourself further into his embrace at the realization, your eyes shut and still stinging from all the crying as your shoulders stopped trembling. He ran his hands up and down your back as you sighed, and with the feeling of his lips resting against the top of your head, you felt yourself drifting off to sleep for the first time in three days.

There was still a dull ache in your chest, but you felt safe again.

You were there, and Harry was there, and tomorrow would be a new day.

But you’d remember this one always.

[crosbyaamiya1992]

What Can We Do To Increase Height Eye-Opening Diy Ideas

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* The Bow Down - This exercise is vital because if you do not really aware of what we need to stick to lean out and grow further in their full growth potential.Here are some exercises just as important.It is said to create space in front of them.The first thing you much do to reverse this effect when you were pulling it down.And those are some amazing exercises that can help you increase your height fast.

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How To Increase Height At 16

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