#and his soul is not so pure anymore lol in the sense that he has SEEN things

[pinkcrittertomb]

I have an beloved one piece oc but she's from my au that is about Usopp leaving the crew at water 7 :D . After the crew (without usopp) reunite and continues their journey after fishman island, they find out Usopp is still a pirate and has a crew now, and apparently he's the captain???(not like he had any choice lol i have some ideas about it). Maybe between the arcs where the strawhats meets law and dressrosa happens, the crew and usopp has a surprise encounter with each other. Anyways my oc makes part of Usopp's crew and she is his precious little thing, they only have a few years old apart and act much like siblings <3

[adokyoguen]

Can you write a fic where Muzan sees the reincarnation of his late wife who he married when he was a human.

★۰ ໋࣭ muzan x reader.

omg I really liked this request so much that I wanted to do two parts, lol

this will be before Muzan finds the reincarnation of his late wife okay? I hope you like it and I'll be posting the second part soon :)

note: any grammatical errors made, please ignore. English is not my first language so I ask for patience :((

Muzan was never affectionate, at least the upper moons never noticed a feeling of empathy or an ounce of happiness in muzan. Everyone described him as spiteful and insensitive, he sees no value in humans. To his subordinates... he never showed respect.

But what no one knew was that a long time ago, Muzan actually had a family, he didn't have children, but Muzan has a wife, or rather, he did. She died a long time ago, he didn't even remember her face anymore, like, it was more than a thousand years alive as a demon... how could he remember? But he remembered all the effort she had put into giving her husband as much comfort as possible. Muzan was currently in the Infinity Castle, testing some experiments, but it seemed like something was wrong, the man felt something draining his energy. Even if it was 0.1%, he could feel it.

Was this some effect of the experiment? No... Muzan knew very well what he was messing with, and no side effects involved mental fatigue, especially from the first Oni that existed. Maybe it was his intrusive thoughts about humans that ended up leading him to you. He really hated humans, he wouldn't hesitate in the slightest to take one's life, but with you... was it different?

When he turned into an oni, you were there, in fact neither of you two understood very well what had happened to Muzan, but you never treated him with indifference... you had a pure heart, too pure to live in this world cruel, too pure to be rotten.

On the one hand, he would have immensely wished that it had been him who had killed you, it would have been much more dignified than a simple death from natural causes, at least for you. It's ironic to say that Muzan fell in love with you precisely because of your pure heart, since the man was totally the opposite. Even if you were here, Muzan wouldn't be the same caring husband he was years ago, but deep down, he would know that you would never give up on him.

Muzan sat on the chair, trying to clear his mind to return to the experiment, he cursed you deeply for appearing in his thoughts just when he was busy with something that could revolutionize the lives of oni's.

But then... there you were.

Muzan raised his head after feeling a presence in the same room as him, the man knew that Nakime wouldn't put anyone in the infinite castle if it weren't for Muzan's own request, so why is he feeling watched?

The answer was you.

For some reason that even he couldn't describe, you were there, exactly as you were buried, for a split second, he might have thought he was going crazy, but he didn't want to think about it. Muzan got up from the chair and approached his late wife, you looked so... cold. He didn't show any hint of emotion in his eyes when he raised his hand to touch your cheek, that touch wasn't a form of affection, it was just a test to see if he could feel your skin.

And the answer was no, the hand instantly passed across her figure. How were you here? Had he cursed his soul or something? Haven't you rested in peace all these years?

— Y/N?— Muzan calls you, hoping that you could respond.

Hope, this word is something he hasn't had for many years, of course his greatest hope was the blue Spider Lily Flower, but he never felt hope in the human race. But well... you're not human anymore, so he didn't care about his momentary weakness.He watched her hand come up and land on his hand, which was flying across his cheek. Muzan felt his senses scramble when you gave him a smile, that smile he thought he would never see again.

Muzan never left his cold expression, after years of being an oni and killing people... he no longer felt anything inside him, and at that moment, it was the same. His thoughts were interrupted with smoke filling the place, Muzan hurried to move the container that was causing this away from his table, so that the smoke would stop.

His gaze turned to you, but you weren't there. The man looked at the room he was in, looking for any sign of his presence, even though he felt that there was no one else with him. Muzan sat in his chair again, looking at the blueprint he was studying on his desk.

Brugmansia suaveolens of course... how did he not think of that before? The man took his notebook from the table, where he had notes about the variations of plants on the planet.

Brugmansia is a genus of seven species of flowering plants in the nightshade family Solanaceae. They are woody trees or shrubs, with pendulous flowers, and have no spines on their fruit. Their large, fragrant flowers give them their common name of angel's trumpets, adjacent to the nickname devil's trumpets of the closely related genus Datura.

Side effects of Brugmansia include nausea, vomiting, dry eyes, increased heart rate, dizziness and visual hallucination.

[1schadenfreude1]

Rewriting Cain Boyfriend to Death 2 Love how the BTD fandom just collectively agreed to adopt EP's characters as our own I am absolutely tormented by the fact that Cain had so much potential but just. does not have the best writing ugh he's too similar to Rire and it kills me SO I am rewriting the fallen angel, lots of headcanons below the cut

Cain's number one motivation for why he does what he does is BOREDOM He's been torturing people in hell for centuries and it's become BORING. He wants something new, something interesting. He wants to see live humans and savor their emotions. Cain misses being human He'd never admit it out loud of course, but he does miss having real human emotions and enjoying human pleasures. Of course he can't be on earth too long while angels are hunting him, but maybe, spending time with humans will help him regain some of that human feeling?

Cain is chaotic evil incarnate LISTEN everyone in btd2 is a silly dork and Cain should be one too. He should have the most unpredictable and immature chaotic energy. Do you trust this face??? You shouldn't

I think he just. does shit without thinking. Like he's been away from real humans for so long that he's sort of forgotten how fragile they can be.

"Oh c'mon little toy you can handle a little boiling water, right? Hello? Human? Fuck. Guess I need a new one." Yeah he's incredibly overpowered but that doesn't mean he knows how to USE that power lmao. He doesn't know how to interact with people anymore. he wants to be human again, but all he really knows how to do is…torture people. he's so dumb.

Straight up contradicting canon here but-- Cain feels bad for killing Abel Asking about Abel makes Cain get SUPER uncomfortable and shut down. He doesn't wanna talk about it. He definitely doesn't feel remorse about it. Nope. No remorse here. Abel is DEAD and GONE and good riddance and he DEFINITELY doesn't have lingering issues about it. Fuck you. Rips you apart with chains.

He loves bullying Damien though They have each other's phone numbers for god's sake. Cain sends Damien gore porn of the people he's killed. Those two try to kill each other on a weekly basis. It's normal for them. Yes that is Damien's severed arm on the living room wall. It brings Cain joy. Don't worry about it. Totally normal thing to say to your sibling

Cain and Rire are rivals I think this is basically canon (based on Darqx's gorgeous art and animatics) but I wanna delve into it a bit! They're both incredibly powerful supernatural monsters, but their main difference comes down to this: Rire is lawful evil Cain is chaotic evil Cain kills people for purely selfish reasons: he wants to see human reactions and feel their emotions again. He thinks that causing pain will help him feel human. Rire kills people because its his job to collect souls. He loves his job and has a lot of fun with it, but in the end its still his job.

Cain is much, much older but Rire is way more mature

Cain is more powerful, but can't do much when he's stuck in Tartarus Rire is less powerful but has much more freedom of movement

Cain likes to play the long game, seducing victims with romance before going sadistic on them Rire is a busy demon; he likes to have fun but needs that soul sooner rather than later

Cain plans long elaborate dates because he's bored and reads too many romance novels Rire's plans are short and brutal, he does what he wants and that's it

Cain loves humans and wants to savor their reactions and emotions Rire hates humans and treats them like disposable toys

Cain is more interested in pain than sex, he won't rape a victim unless he really likes them Rire likes sex lmao. its a power rush for him and it feels good I hope my ramblings make sense lol

[where-i-overanalyze]

Soul Eater characters and their MLP Gen 4 equivalents

i will be disregarding all ships and familial relationships for this purely because it would make it WAY too complicated and this is my silly little haha. i already put too much thought into it, i cannot burden my mind with the restraint of familial and romantic relations.

first up, the main 7 characters. starting with the one who inspired this all:

Maka as Twilight Sparkle

she's got the wings, she's got the book smart, she's got the power of friendship on her side, it's perfect. this was all started b/c while rewatching the anime, we joked that Maka's dubbed voice sounded like Twilight. this one is the strongest comparison, it gets worse from here.

Soul as Spike

no offense to Soul, but he's usually secondary to Maka most of the time. snarky, sassy, and often asking questions. also, his name is Spike, Soul's got spiky hair, it makes sense.

Black☆Star as Rainbow Dash

cocky, proud, super strong, fast, and blue!! a lot of their development revolves around like valuing other people (Black☆Star is more about like,,,, becoming his own person but y'know) also they both have scratchy voices.

Tsubaki as Fluttershy

calm and mild mannered, but also on occasion has the ability to go apeshit. befriends someone who is quite strong and obnoxious that most characters find annoying.

Death the Kid as Rarity

obsessive about appearances and has a particularly fancy way of talking. pale?? distinctive hair. makes sense.

Patty as Pinkie Pie

no explanation necessary.

Liz as Apple Jack

older sister figure! blonde and realistic, kinda tough and used to having to work for stuff (though Liz doesn't have to do it too much anymore now that she and patty are chilling w/ Kid) also, AJ was the only one left of the mane 6 lol.

Crona as Princess Luna

obviously the moon connection, duh. dark aesthetic, doesn't understand other people, and gets kinda possessed by madness!! which leads into my next choice

Kishin Asura as Nightmare Moon

evil!! but also because they were a bit misunderstood. spreads their powers across the entire world. possesses someone who is also part of them. lives on the moon.

Lord Death as Princess Celestia

tall and a god figure, but also kind of royalty? super OP but also we barely get to see them fight or use their powers ever so that our lovely main characters can be the ones to defeat the big bad. questionable morals at times.

Stein as Discord

crazy ass bitch!! tall and a slightly concerning amount of people simp for them. looks stitched together, stuff sticking out of their heads.

Marie as Princess Cadance

Ox as Snips

weird hair,,,,,,,,,,

Harvar as Snails

tall?? Harvar's a spear so he's tall by default. he's also gold-ish when he's in weapon form so that counts, also pointy b/c unicorn and spear.

Jackie as Octavia

Jackie has to be Octavia b/c her name is based off of cellist Jacqueline du Pré and even though Jackie doesn't play cello, this is who she must be to fulfill her destiny. also, they both have dark hair.

Kim as DJ Pon 3 (Vinyl Scratch)

gay. unicorn, so she has magic like a witch

Kilik and the Pots as the Cutie Mark Crusaders

there's three of them and they are inseparable. do not separate them. Kilik can be Sweetie Belle b/c he's standing in the middle.

Sid as Big Mac

man of few words. super strong and ,,,,,,, angular?? idk they're both kinda blocky. sad eyes,,,,,,,, UNDERRATED.

Naigus as Zecora

doctor!!! also if i was a pony, i would have a crush on Zecora. i have a crush on Naigus. this is my reasoning.

Medusa as Chrysalis

evil. weird and confusing hair!! dark aesthetic with one accent color. insanely manipulative, undeniably slaying.

Arachne as The Storm King

this one comes as a suggestion from Tumblr mutual (and my literal current college suite mate) @xaltiide she says that this guy is "the big bad" but isn't doing Most of the bad stuff in comparison to the other villains.

and finally, my grand finale

Giriko and Justin as Flim and Flam

they suck!!!! they suck SO BAD!!!!!!!! and they're evil. HORRIBLE.

anyways, happy April fools everyone. i finished the last half of this post while an edible kicked in on a Friday night and i feel like that probably shows in what i have created, but i will stand by this.

[yan-lorkai]

A/N: There I was opening up my drafts to finish some requests and I stumbled across this headcanon that I totally forgot existed lol 💀💀. Oh well, anyways requests are open!

Warning: Yandere content ahead. I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

Yandere type: manipulative, clingy.

Simeon is so sweet and caring that you are unable to sense anything wrong with him. I mean, aren't angels supposed to watch over humans and help them in times of need? You don't have to do anything but trust him.

Simeon takes his job very seriously and like an angel in Devildom he is always so determined to help you, to listen to you, to be a shoulder to lean on when the weight of being alone in a strange world becomes too much or when Lucifer's demands and all expectations fall on you.

But don't be fooled because he is always watching you and watching the things that happen around you because he doesn't want your soul to be soiled with pacts or other things and for that reason, he also frequently invites yourself  to Purgatory Hall in order to to monopolize your time and make you dependent on him.

Simeon is such a good manipulator that you will never notice that the thoughts you have were actually shaped by him, that your desires only he can fulfill and that if you walk away, bad things happen around you. But you know, he only manipulates you because he loves you deeply. He wants to protect you at any cost and he knows well what is hidden in the attic, that's not your problem, fixing the brothers is not your problem, after all you didn't even want to be here. Don't you so badly want to go home, back to the human world? You can go together when the exchange program is over, him, you and Luke.

He can already imagine. Having picnics in a park and playing hide and seek or tag. Luke telling you silly stories that make you laugh until your stomach hurts or you humming while he lays his head in your lap to rest. You would be like family. And you certainly don't want to let him or Luke down, right?

If for some reason you feel suffocated by his affections or find out that he was responsible for all the other students not getting close to you, if you disapprove of his actions and tell him you don't want to be around him anymore; Simeon will use his angelic magic to work things out. You may lose some of your personality and some of your memories, but you will be pure again, free from sin, free from worries and your pacts, you will be like an angel and nothing could make you happier than this. He will do anything to keep you on his side.

Yandere Type: Controlling, clingy

Barbatos is an interesting yandere. He is a mystery, he has deep layers that cover his entire being and the deeper your relationship with him gets, the deeper his tendencies tend to get worse. He wants so badly to be good to you and take care of you and bask in your warmth, but he can also see all the timelines and he knows how you're going to react to each situation, how you're going to scream lies, how you're going to run away, and how he has to punish you so that you finally realize how wrong you were. That's why he worked for months creating a timeline just like the current one and lovingly took you there.

Barbatos isn't delusional to the point of thinking you love him, in fact he knows you don't love him at first and that's really unfortunate, but he'll have you anyway. I mean, he's already trapped you in a new timeline where everyone you meet are just puppets controlled by him. All just a touch of familiarity to calm you down and settle into your new home.

And he's not opposed to drugging you or using a spell that makes you unable to leave him, of course he would have the necessary knowledge being the one who controls time.

With Stockholm or not, Barbatos loves to hold you for long periods of time without having to worry about a thing. The wave of shocks that run through his entire body is sublime and his eyes are filled with so much love that he feels it overflowing inside his chest. Aside from his powers and knowledge, he has nothing, not even memories of his childhood with his parents that he could cling to in his melancholy moments. But he knows things are different with you because he's seen all versions of you, he's experienced love and he knows he can make you fall in love with him and he will.

You were made for each other. If he has to break you and rebuild you for you to realize that, then so be it. He has time on his side and your efforts to escape would be futile anyway - what can you do against him? He's almost a god.

 But if you love him, if you're innocent enough not to see the perverse reality, or if you don't care enough to escape, he'll spoil you rotten. You're finally realizing how much easier things are when you just accept them instead of fighting them. How adorable you are, Mc!

[jimin-of-mine]

are twin flames like queerplatonic partners? or do you think twin flames can be qpp? does everyone have a twin flame? I'm asexual and aromantic and I've always dreamed of having a qpp but after reading a bit of your experience I think what I've always dreamed of (and wished for) is having a twin flame

Hi! You're the second 'ask' I have had asking me about twin flames and you're not actually trying to be rude in any way...

I'm happy to know my posts are reaching the people I want them to.

So, I want to thank you for reaching out, because it gives me the courage to continue- despite all of the hate I deal with on a daily basis.

I will explain here for you and hopefully it won't get too long, but they are a rather complex connection ~

To answer your question, yes- everyone has at least one twin flame.

Contrary to popular belief though that is thoroughly influenced by conditioning beliefs from others and their projections- you can have more than one.

I have crossed paths with people who have at least four, other's who have one and then there was one very advanced spiritual person I knew who has seven.

It goes to show how unique and totally personal this connection is to each and every person.

You don't always need to have romantic feelings towards your other halves, since this will be something that is very different for each person.

Your gender doesn't matter and neither does your sexuality, because twin flames encompass pure and true unconditional love for each other.

This is why everyone thinks Jimin and Jungkook are dating, because they are always on the fence, so to speak.

They do things that regular people wouldn't with each other and you can just tell that they're MORE, if that makes sense.

You can tell how natural it comes to them as well, and let's not forget their motto that they have been saying to each other for literally years now "You are me and I am you..."

Which brings me to the next thing I need to say here ~

Twin flames are different to soul mates, because your twin flame is literally a part of your DNA- regardless of what nationality or country you are born into.

You mirror each other, because they ARE essentially you, but in another body- which is also another good example with Jimin and Jungkook.

They choose similar clothes, their personalities are remarkably similar and they even have similar mannerisms- which is probably why they even began to say their motto to begin with.

When they come out with albums and what not, their concepts aren't identical, but they match up to a certain degree.

People think this is on purpose, but it's not. Jungkook may 'copy' Jimin as he said to a certain point- but there's no way that you can get it THAT right.

Watching this show of theirs, has shown me how even more similar I am to them and it's explained why I do certain things even lol- and they make me laugh- because learning about them, I am also learning more things about myself :)

I hope that this has answered your questions- but if you have anymore, please feel free to send me an 'ask' anytime.

Otherwise, I really hope that you enjoy the rest of your week ^__^

[elveny]

I posted 3,272 times in 2022

169 posts created (5%)

3,103 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sharkapologists

@cecilyacat

@okami-zero

@elveny

@barbex

I tagged 2,961 of my posts in 2022

Only 10% of my posts had no tags

#ffxiv - 681 posts

#art - 653 posts

#lol - 157 posts

#fic rec - 113 posts

#dragon age - 84 posts

#tumblr - 81 posts

#estinien varlineau - 78 posts

#mass effect - 66 posts

#tiktok - 64 posts

#writing - 63 posts

Longest Tag: 117 characters

#also the reason why ppl like david tennant and patrick stewart or ian mckellen have the charisma and presence they do

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Ethan Hawke on creativity:

"Most people don't think about poetry, right? They have a life to live, and they're not really that concerned - until their father dies, they go to a funeral, you lose a child. Somebody breaks your heart, they don't love you anymore. And all of a sudden, you're desperate for making sense out of this life, and 'Has anybody ever felt this bad before?'

Or the inverse! Something great. You meet somebody and your heart explodes. You love them so much you can't even see straight. You know, you're dizzy! 'Did anybody feel like this before? What is happening to me?'

And that's when art is not a luxury, it's actually sustenance."

47 notes - Posted June 20, 2022

#4

Excuse me, I am still reeling from how perfectly @schoute captured my Adriene and Estinien, I love it so so so so much and cannot asddksaaskussdwedf!!!!😭😭😭😍😍😍

59 notes - Posted June 30, 2022

#3

Emet-Selch is canonically a character that used to be very close to the WoL (or rather their former incarnation). Someone that CANONICALLY complained but always came to help. Someone who cared so much he, over 12 millenia, tried to bring back millions of people.

Was he a villain in the end? Sure! But he TELLS you why. He tells you that he feels, loves, grieves. Even after he managed to convince himself that nobody around him is even "alive" and can thus be killed without remorse, DESPITE THAT, he wants to hope that there's another way.

That YOU, the WoL, as the reincarnation of someone he cared deeply for, can make the difference. He could've killed you so, so often. He doesn't. Because he *cares*, he wants you to understand, so he explains and works with you and shows you what happened and the why.

This is all told and shown in the game, btw, that's not fanon.

Emet-Selch is an excellent continuation of Hades - saying one thing and doing another. He cares for Azem and WoL, deeply. Does it excuse his actions? No. But it explains them. He doesn't kill because he wants to and because he relishes power. He kills to restore his WORLD.

If you were told you had to trample down thirteen ant hills to save the world, your family, your loved ones, everyone you know, to make those insignificant ants the people they used to be - you would, too.

82 notes - Posted May 26, 2022

#2

If the latest episode of Obi-Wan Kenobi shows anything then it’s the pure horror, terror and soul-ripping despair Darth Vader brings to the galaxy.

And I don’t mean the scene where he drags Obi-Wan into the fire, bc that’s, like… yeah sure, he’s petty and vengeful and so full of hatred and anger, but that’s personal. That’s him and Obi-Wan, of course he’s vengeful and cruel there.

But that scene before.

Where he walks through the village, killing people when he passes them for no reason other than… killing. Trying to get a reaction of the man he assumes is there. The father he rips through the window and chokes in the air, the child rushing to try and help his dad whose neck he snaps. The woman he drags face-down through the sand while she flails. Holy fuck. Imagine you’re living in the galaxy and one day, the Empire comes and takes over. And the Force-sensitive people they have are broken and cruel and they maim and threaten and are horrible enough. And then comes Darth Vader. And you just know that NOTHING is safe. Nothing will ever be safe again. You can be a loyalist and still be dead the next second just because… no because. For no reason. Nothing is safe.

85 notes - Posted June 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I can't get over how GOOD Andor is. They are not making "episodes", they are making a STORY and dividing this into episodes. And it's so, so good. The characterization is amazing, the Empire is really and truly BAD and fascist and horrible, and the rebellion is ... not heroic clean awesomeness. It's dirty and doing what needs to be done and it's not easy. Or always morally good. It's "oppression breeds rebellion" and using that. Holy shit.

And yes, I know the whole thing of "Disney is actually bad etc blabla" and YES, there is a problem, but we're operating within a system of capitalism and rising fascism, and I truly believe that the message of Andor is important.

106 notes - Posted November 8, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[girl4music]

Comment by Moonystic: “LOL both of our personalities belong in the Analysts category, so of course we're going to drill into this inside out from a logical point of view.

Just so l'm clear: Are you talking metaphorically or figuratively? Are you saying a vampire isn't actually a demon in a human's body? That vampires are basically mentally ill people? Or just Angel? Or what?

Also, where are you on your watch?”

Well, I’m an INTP, a Virgo and Claircognizant.

So yeah, you’re definitely right about that.

I mean just Angel/Angelus because he seems to be the only one with a split-divide identity/personality going on. I definitely think he is the outlier in the lore.

Yes, I do not believe the “demonic possession” narrative. I think while the human is no longer alive, they’re still very much present in the undead. In the vampire.

While the soul might be missing, the psyche is still intact. So for me, if there is a demon involved in this, it’s less a possession and more of a corruption.

The metaphor is that there is a demon in them. Not that the demon is them. So possession doesn’t really make sense unless the human is still alive - which it isn’t.

I think it’s more likely that the human becomes a demon through corruption due to the loss of a soul. ‘Cause for me, a soul isn’t the human. It’s just the human’s moral compass. But the human is now dead and the consciousness has transferred to the vampire who is basically a half-breed demon but is not possessed by a pure demon.

So yeah, there’s a demon involved in vampirism. It’s just not demonic possession because that means the vampire is an entirely different entity altogether and has nothing to do with the human other than it looks like it because It takes its body for itself.

But that’s obviously wrong because no other vampire besides Angel/Angelus appears to be two entirely different people/entities. So there’s obviously something more than vampirism going on with that man/monster.

Everyone else largely just remains themselves as what they were when they were human and all that’s missing is the soul they had when they were human so they don’t possess an internal moral compass anymore. This means that their animalistic base desires they repressed as a human are front and center and are emphasised in the vampire. Which makes them act immoral and selfish. More animal than monster.

They’re just corrupted by evil. They’re not possessed as it. Because that doesn’t make sense. Angel/Angelus is a mental disorder. His psyche is there but it’s severely disordered so he unconsciously splits himself into two different entities and the way the curse works makes it appear as possession because magic is incompatible with physics. What in true time-space would be a 200 year evolution/regression looks as if it happens immediately. Looks as if someone just flicked the switch in his body.

Comment by Moonystic: “"It's a split-personality disorder very reminiscent to Willow/Dark Willow"

-Not sure I agree with that. This magic addiction storyline is exactly what it's supposed to be. An addiction storyline, one of the obvious toxicity stories of this season. Addicts act like a different person. They hurt the ones the love. They don't think clearly. Only the story is more aligned with alcoholism rather than drugs. Like how she will never truly recover, she will always be an addict. Willow's addiction arc started WAY before Tara and her death. It started in S2, with the soul restoration spell. When Tara was killed, Willow relapsed.”

Yes, I know that that’s what the metaphor is with what Willow goes through in Season 6. Dark Willow is absolutely power corruption, addiction and vengeance. 100%. But Willow/Dark Willow is very reminiscent to the Angel/Angelus scenario in that, like you said, Angel has to play the hero and absolve himself of his own guilt so that he can continue doing what he is doing. Willow does the same thing only the opposite way around. She plays the villain because she’s given up the “I am a hero” persona because ‘better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven’. She lets the power and the black magicks take over but her psyche is still very much there. It’s just disordered. She’s still just Willow. All she’s done is used a coping mechanism of splitting herself into two different people as to cope with what she’s going through. Her experience and the intense emotions she feels because she still has a soul. It’s just buried under the immense power she possesses as an insanely powerful witch which is further corrupting her the longer she lets it. It’s a completely different metaphor they’re going for like you said, I know that. But it’s still very much the same scenario going on with Angelus wanting to play the hero and absolve himself from his own guilt as Angel.

That’s why I say both scenarios are a split-personality disorder. A temporary one for Willow but a permanent one for Angel. I hope you understand what I mean by that. I love Willow’s Season 6 arc so I very much respect the metaphor and what they were doing with her character. But I do acknowledge how Willow often likes to live in her cosplay moments to feel less like a loser or geek or whatever when with others - especially those she loves and is in love with. Like Tara. In her mind, that person is now gone, so why would she even bother putting on a show anymore? She gives up. She caves in to the rage and hate and darkness within. Something that has always existed within Willow but was just deeply repressed. So in a way, it is also very much a “loss of soul” or “loss of humanity” scenario she has to contend with when she becomes Dark Willow. It’s the other way around with Angelus though because Angelus is the one that was cursed. Not Angel. Angel IS the curse. He represents the moral compass missing in Angelus or in “Liam”. He is the soul restored. But he is not wholly separated or divided from Angelus (the demon) because he is just one side to the ship of Theseus that has had its parts deconstructed and then reconstructed again. It might look and behave entirely differently, but it is still very much the exact same built ship within. It is only the ship itself that needs to pretend that it is anything else but that ship all the while undergoing it’s damage and experiencing it’s consciousness. A “possessed” ship makes no sense because it has no reason to feel damaged. And it makes no sense with any other vampire either, which is fine, because they don’t look or behave like two entirely different ships. They very much look and behave like the same built ship with a lack of conscience and impulse control.

Comment by Moonystic: “It's not just a nickname to him, he NEEDS it to prove that these are 3 separate entities (Angel, Angelus, and Liam). Liam's consciousness (where the personality, preferences, memories, etc. are stored) still exists, it's just that the demon is in control. Otherwise Angel(/Liam) wouldn't be able to reemerge out of Angelus whenever cursed and vice versa.

So Liam's traits were transferred to "Angel," including his lack of mental maturity. That also explains why Angel is acting like a possessive boyfriend. Liam was a womanizer, after all. Except Angel just THINKS he's not Liam, so he allows himself to act superior to Buffy. It's very clear how he feels about her: She's immature. Well, duh!

Anyway, this is him lying to himself that he's this new, made-up entity.”

I’ve chosen to think of the split-divide identities/personalities thing as a mental disorder. It’s a split-personality disorder very reminiscent to Willow/Dark Willow which nobody has any problem understanding as entirely the same person just with a severe trauma complex which can’t be wholly separated or divided from Willow either as well as insanely powerful black magicks she allows to take over so she can achieve her goal of avenging Tara’s death. It’s not a demonic possession of any kind. It’s a coping mechanism to escape/avoid her complex trauma and especially the pain/grief of losing Tara.

Angel/Angelus is no different. The Two Ships is actually One Ship just with being incompatible with time-space boundaries and so it looks as if they’re entirely different people. The supernatural doesn’t work with physics so Angel/Angelus is incompatible with time-space. That’s why it looks like demonic possession but it actually isn’t. And it isn’t for any other significant vampire who mostly retains their psyche as a human. They appear to be the same person just with a lack of a conscience and impulse control on their base desires. Which is more animal than monster to be perfectly honest. There is no other significant vampire in the show that split-divides in identity and personality. Just Angel/Angelus. He is the outlier and inconsistency in the vampire lore. Not everybody else that’s a significant vampire!

Even Vampire Willow is still largely the same person when you consider Willow’s actions and choices later in the show. The sadism, the dominance, the controlling, the power hunger. Of course that would be fully emphasised if Willow lost her soul because it’s deeply repressed with one.

And last but not least - external influence. The condition of external influence. The company a vampire keeps. This has a major affect on how the vampire behaves and perceives. Spike proves this.

Angel/Angelus is the only “demon” that appears to be and behaves like two completely different people but that makes no sense either because they still carry the consciousness of each other. Both consciousnesses are very present in the conscious experience of the other all the time.

It’s a split-personality mental disorder. It is not demonic possession or demonic incarceration. The supernatural can only explain so much in Sunnydale. But science exists and matters too.

[laeteria]

ROAD TO LEGEND: a random thoughts dump

I know everyone is over the Road to Legend phase, but I was chatting with a friend some time ago and they asked me what I thought of the song and MV. I told them that I didn't know, because I hadn't really listened to it too much. That's the life of someone who's in multiple fandoms after all.

I finally decided to share my thoughts on it, because the lyrics is surprisingly a lot of fun.

I'm writing this in a state that everything and nothing makes sense, so I'm sorry if I'm writing nonsense LOL.

So every unit appears in the MV and the lyrics are basically directed towards them. I will do the old groups first, because it's easier to write about them since we already know the units.

First of all, I like how they keep the overall theme their road to becoming legends is. I mean, yes. The title is "Road to Legend" after all, but I was surprised how they kept the theme so clean and it made a lot of sense as well. That's BURAIKAN for you.

BAE

Show me your soul, it still starts here

Are you pursuing it? Are you putting your heart into it?

BAE is a unit that came together after an outfall with their family. They don't have support from their family and they are living together and trying to get by with the three of them.

The first line doesn't sound that intimidating, but the sound line is just plain mockery. It's as if Chisei is saying that BAE may be going their own way, but they are not truly going after it. They are not serious about it. Is there maybe something that's still holding them back to give it their everything…?

THE CAT'S WHISKERS

Indicate the location of rivals to survive

Would you still travel when there are troubles?

I was not sure to include the first two lines when The Cat's Whiskers appeared, but I decided to still do it. I'm actually not sure if there is a meaning behind it. I'm completely lost. The first thing that came to mind was XXXX. But like… how do I connect it? The reason for thinking about XXXX is purely because Saimon and Yohei were kind of rivals when it came to Tsubaki.

What do they mean by troubles? Maybe Tsubaki's health…? I'm not sure. I feel like I'm reaching for nothing...

The bell will ring again

My bus that runs and emits exhaust fumes

The line "The bell will ring again" sounded pretty hopeful, but I was like "they would never put something like that between these lines full of dissing people". Then I read the last line and went oooh…

Exhaust fumes are not good for humans, so maybe it means something like Buraikan is not to be reached, it will be dangerous around Buraikan…? BUT THAT DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH TCW AAAAAAA—

So what if we took it super literally and say that they may still be going forward, but it won't take long before they can't go on anymore? What if the ringing of the bell means they have to to stop, but every time you stop it will get harder to continue…?

COZMEZ

Do it or die. I’m not going to be worn out

Really hurt if it’s a kid’s game

I don't really have a lot to say about this part, because I feel like it could be the line for any group, but it does fit cozmez the best in the end. I'm not gonna to be worn out is probably directed towards the whole Nayuta scenario when he was on the rooftop and… yeah. He basically couldn't go on anymore and that's why he went to the rooftop. He was at his limit.

Though, we can assume that Haruomi was pushed to his limits many times, but didn't give up because of Chisei. Better said, Buraikan and cozmez are very alike in a way, but so different at the same time. Both units have something mysterious to them related to AT, but what has yet to be revealed…

AKKAN YATSURA

Now I’m putting you in charge, everything above is incomparable

Showed you a different side, two digits three digits

You can’t go over us if you’re screwing around

On the contrary, you’ll get really hurt

I had something in mind, but… hehe. I forgot. So… Iori is basically the leader of AKYR and it kind of felt like it was directed towards him, but I'm not sure... Iori is the outgoing leader of AKYR, that's how people view him from the outside, but we all know that he's doing a lot of stuff in the background regarding the Suiseki gumi.

The thing is… AKYR's story doesn't really seemed to have progressed a lot so far, especially in the case of the older members. What have they been doing in the stage battles? Who knows. If they keep going like this, there will be a chance that they will lose even more of their "family" than they already did. When will they finally show the true colours of AKYR? Maybe this upcoming season…?

This section is all about the lines that appeared with the new units, but since we don't know anything about them, I will write about it with the interpretation that the line could be for anyone, if not for Buraikan themselves. I hope you understand.

VISTY

Hey Boy, your shoelaces are untied

If you know that and you’re playing along, you’re silly

We are starting with this line that everyone kind of found funny when the song was released. I mean… your shoelaces are untied! I really believe this could apply to everyone, because the lyrics is all about the road to becoming legends. Prior to this, it was all about not being able to keep up and still running despite knowing that.

When you go running, it's important that your shoelaces are tied. Tying your shoelaces will already be half of the work done. If you don't tie it, your shoe won't fit or it will be uncomfortable to walk in. What they are saying is that if you know your shoelaces are untied and you're still running (playing along), you are not taking it seriously at all. That's Buraikan for you. Burning everyone from left to right.

Another interpretation is being taken advantage off. You know when you were little and people would say "Your shoelaces are untied!" and you would look at your shoes, only to get hit in your face or something like that? I think you know where I'm going. If you know you're taken advantage off, why would you even play along?

AMPRULE

Reaching out and passing the mic? Will you give a double shot?

Okay, but this line was actually really funny. It really had to be this line for AMPRULE… It's as if they are saying that Dongha wants to be the best since he's reaching for the mic and we know that reaching for the mic equals being the top dog. In this case, Buraikan is on top and AMPRULE wants to overtake their place, but it's actually Dongha wanting to be better than Hajun with the whole Yeon family problem. Dongha is reaching out to it, because he can't have it (yet).

The thing is, the lyrics also says passing the mic and you pass the mic to give someone below you a chance to talk. The way I see it is that Dongha knows he's actually on the same level as everyone (or below that www), but he acts as if he's on top and that's why he's passing the mic to let others now he's the alpha when he's really not LMAO.

The double shot can also mean that they have to perform two times in a row, but it's difficult to pull that off when you're not sure of your own abilities, so yeah… It's really through and through mockery coming from Buraikan.

1NM8

Why was I chosen? I asked God

I’m not the dead, but I was able to rise

I feel like these lines have more to do with the whole shady business of AT and that's why it appeared with 1Nm8, since they seem to have the closest relation to AT (at least from the vibes and info we are getting).

I also feel like it could just be about Chisei, especially about the "I’m not the dead, but I was able to rise" line. No one knows about Chisei's whereabouts and it's one mystery after another. What's actually happening behind the scenes…? What is AT doing and what are they actually aiming for? A lot of questions, but no answers yet.

GOKULUCK

From this star’s point of view, it’s a stupid story

Let’s leave a mark, C’mon Homie

I'm burned out and have no brain power left to think. I'm going to cut it short. Goku Luck seems to have the most connections to the old cast and I'm not connecting anything at all, help. It kind of gives me the vibe that what happened isn't anything special according to them.

The second line is more Buraikan, because they are the legendary unit and if you have accomplished something big, you are bound to leave something behind. It's also nice that they said "mark", because there are sometimes landmarks along the road. Does this mean that Buraikan is trying to help them uncovering the mysteries around Paradox Live in their own way? Probably…

That was all and I'm sorry that I cut it short at the end. In the end, no one will read this anyway and it will only be a random post on this Tumblr of mine.

The song obviously connects better when you read all the lyrics, but I thought it was fun to try to connect the lines with the groups, although it didn't always work out… At least I was able to pass some time, huehuehue...

[irisofpurple]

Mine

Summary: After all the years of pining, Lana was finally officially his.

Book: Open Heart Book 3 (Chapter 16)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey×f!MC (Lana Stevens)

Word Count: 650

Warnings/Rating: Fluff, adult situations; Teen.

A/N: My heart is still so heavy. I just can't let go of this couple so I wrote this drabble in between classes. I initially thought I'd write smut but it ended up disgustingly fluffy somehow. I'm posting anyway cause I can't deal with this alone. Hope you enjoy reading. Love you all!

Disclaimer: All characters are owned by Pixelberry.

She snuggled into him. Her hands running leisurely up and down the rugged dips and valleys of his chest.

He smiled contentedly and breathed her in. The same drugging vanilla scent that has been driving him insane for three years now.

She had no idea what she did to him. Just the touch of her hands, the fan of her sweet breath on his neck, the feel of her in his arms, made his heart so full he could die right there. He didn't think he could love anyone more.

And she loved him too.

He was still reeling from the realization. He couldn't believe he gets to call her his now. All his. Only his.

When he had confessed his real feelings to her, he hadn't expected her to say it back. She was a free spirit, young and beautiful and ambitious. She had her entire life ahead of her. He didn't want to tie her down. Make her stay with him when she didn't want to.

He had almost made up his mind to keep his feelings to himself. Like he always had.

But when she came into his office tonight to seek him out, leaving behind a lavish party thrown for her success and full of her best friends, looking like her entire world began and ended with him, he had simply cracked. He couldn't keep the truth from her anymore. He couldn't hold back.

She had to know. Or he wouldn't be able to live with himself for the rest of his life.

It was too painful. He couldn't bear to watch her go without giving her the full truth first. She always did hate it when he withheld information from her.

And she was right. As always. She was a smart, independent woman. She didn't need him to decide what she deserved to know.

And Ethan was glad he came to his senses in time.

Because she loved him.

He was sure couldn't ever be happier if he tried. Except maybe if he could put a ring on her finger. But all in good time. He didn't want to scare her off.

For now he relished in the feeling of being hers as he traced the curve of her tiny waist with his fingers.

She chuckled into his chest, the sound vibrating through his body and making him feel ten years younger.

"That tickles." she murmured, burying her face deeper onto him.

"Yeah?" Ethan asked innocently, his intent anything but. "You mean this?"

He moved his fingers delicately up and down her waist, moving onto the front of her belly. A whisper of touch, soft and tender first and then harder and harder.

"Stop it." she squeeled.

She was full-on giggling now, desperately trying to free herself from his grip.

Too bad cause he wasn't letting her go. Not now. Not ever.

The look of pure unadulterated joy on her face made Ethan's chest swell with pride. He needed more of it. He'd do anything to make her smile, to make her laugh like that.

In his moment of distraction, Lana managed to wrench one arm free and pin him down, her golden hair falling on his face as they both laughed in bliss like teenagers.

"You're going to pay for that" she said, the devilish glint in her emerald eyes unmistakable.

"I'd happily spend my entire life paying you back. For as long as you'll have me." He promised, tucking away some strands behind her ear so he could see her face.

She seemed visibly moved. Clearly she wasn't expecting him to say that.

But Ethan was done with keeping his feelings from her.

This was him. No filter.

"I love you" she whispered, gazing so deep into his eyes that Ethan was sure she could see his soul.

"I love you too. And you're mine."

I hope that wasn't too saccharine for you. I don't know what came over me but I needed to get it out. I couldn't focus on my lessons. I'll make up for this by writing some smut or angst in the evening probably lol.

As always, thank you for reading! <3

Tags: @lem-20 @pixie88 @aleynareads @maurine07 @whimsicallywayward15 @lovingramsey @coffeeheartaddict @txemrn @shewillreadyou @aussieez @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @schnitzelbutterfingers @imaneditorthankyouverymuch @mercury84choices @thegreentwin @openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations

[rjshepofftheshits]

More luxu rambelings???

I just can't bring myself to let luxu go from canon BC I just love him sm. I know people want him to just be bad, no redemption arc but my middle name is redemption au so obviously I'm doing one for kingdom hearts

lol i say i love him then proceed to torture him for several paragraphs

I'm in the " people deserve to be able to redeem themselves " and " you are under no obligation to forgive someone for their actions" can and should coexist camp. ive applied this in this au to xemnas, ansem and even Young xehanort ( ill rambel about him later but tldr he doesnt go back to the past at the end of kh3 like hes meant to, a replica of him does purely because i wanted to keep him in the future but ill elaborate on the story reason for it later.)

Post kh4 luxu definitely falls closer to the " no forgiveness" end of that scale. AU Xemnas worked hard and eventually endeared himself to people, even kairi who he kinda got killed. ok maybe hes not totally forgiven, maybe he never will be but he's at least accepted by the majority. Ansem has his own little neich and a casual but friendly relationship with riku, provided he doesnt talk to much. YMX is acting like a kid, finally having the normal youth that was ripped away from him by MOM . Luxu on the other hand just sort of....gives up. He's not su#idal or anything he just sort of stops caring. the norts try to bring him round, show him if they can do it he can too but... He's broken beyond measure, he doesn't have the strength of will to try any more and loses a sense of self/ego. If someone tells him to do something, he does it, if they tell him to go , he leaves without protest. im not even sure hed defend himself if attacked, he probably just stand there and take it or maybe try to run? after going through this nightmare existance for the last 250+ years , for him to be the only forteller left ,for all the misery he caused only for it to mean nothing in the end is soul crushing. needless to say his sense of self-worth is lower than dirt. Luxu really seems to believe he deserves this dogs abuse for what hes done.

I cant imagine how lonely he was before kh4 but now after its all over and hes burned every bridge hes ever walked, hes completly desolate and renounced by everyone. worst part is, its kinda his own fault.

i think he tries to go back to radiant garden, if for no other reason than getting yelled at by people you know is preferable to being compltly abandoned and outcast. he feels a little comfort from being in the castle but the radient garden gang are none to happy to see him. Ienzo is pleasant if short, surprised to see him . the others however are not, ranging from dismissive, rude and cold attitudes from even and Aeleus right up to outright hostile and violent from Dilan. Dilan is normally pretty calm all things considered but when he sees Luxu standing before Lord Ansem, asking for forgiveness and to stay with them for a little its fucking on sight . Aeleus escorts him out before Dilan can REALLY hurt him but not before reminding him he isnt welcome there anymore. He accuses him of just apologising to assuage his guilt and not because he's actually sorry for all the shit he put them through, which isn't untrue but he really is sorry if you would just hear him out for 5 seconds . Understandably Aeleus shuts the door in his face. He might want to apologise but they dont want to or arent ready to hear it and he knows trying to force that on them would do more damage than good .Luxu still hangs around castle town for a few days licking his wounds in both a literal and figurative sense before deciding that the others are right to be angry and gives up on them.

(just imagine that simpsons clip with bart and lisa "you can actually pinpoint the second his heart rips in half")

whats even worse about all this is that i imagine post kh4, luxu has no keyblade. think about it, all the other fortellers have their own keyblades but luxu gets the master of masters old one. its already covered in scratches by the time he gets it so it cant be made from his heart like all other keyblades, it has to be MoM's. and since MoM is gone now in this au, that means his keyblade is gone too. so lets sumarize. luxu has : no friends, no home, no keyblade and no purpose. i imagine he's feeling pretty low

but because im horrible im going to make it worse.

You remember the subplot of maleficent looking for the book of proficies? well after all this she still hasnt found it but she does now know Xigbar is luxu and who luxu really is. So, understandably she decides to ask him a few friendly questions on the subject by which i mean string him up and slash him with vines until he tells her what she wants to hear.

Listen ive been talking consistantly about how broken and at a loss luxu is but if theres one thing to bring back his defiant streak its this bs from maleficent. homeboy has been holding his tongue for nearly 3 centuries, hes not going to break for a dramatic witch and her pet furry.

Frustrated with her lack of success maleficent takes him back to radient garden and threatens to chuck him off a cliff into an abyss or maybe the water treatment turbines. Luxu is still defiant, even weak and bleeding from her interrogation. He doesn't want to die particularly, he's never read the book of profocies but she doesn't know that. if it means fucking with maleficent then he's happy to go and nip her dumb plans in the bud.

now in my little headcanon its my oc shep whos looking out for him. she has a similar backstory, being burdened with a great task, much older than her physical appearance would suggest so she feels a little kinship with luxu, despite how he's hurt her but for the sake of keeping this somewhat canon compliant so other people can enjoy it lets say dilan takes her place.

Sorry to the luxu stans out there I'm just whumping this man for his life.

Just when it seems like she's about have Pete fling him over the edge something bonks Pete in the head and clatters to the floor. Luxu might be weak from injury or bloodloss but he's not stupid, he might have to crawl but he's getting away from these assholes, kicking Pete in the shins for good measure. Absolutely no prizes for guessing who it is that's come to rescue him.

The radiant garden gang cannot stand maleficent. Ok they gave up their hearts but SHE was the one to drag radiant garden into the darkness, squatting in their home like a frog for 10 years. Dilan is still mad as hell but he's also not just about to sit there and let that arrogant witch have her way. They can't beat her, not even with the 5 of them but thankfully she's not looking for a fight. She and Pete retreat for now, promising to come back for luxu and some answers. Even Even takes that shit personally and is ready to throw hands with her if she ever comes back. Luxu is just sort of sat in stunned silence even as he's ushered into the castle to have his wounds treated.

Things are a little bit tense but they can't exactly leave luxu to die from infection or exposure. Until someone makes a joke Like " damn even didn't know you had it in you" followed by some bravado from a usually fairly risk adversed Even, and a little alughter all round. Even Dilan has a small smile and for maybe just a moment everything feels normal again for luxu like maybe there's a little hope after all.

on that topic i think i will call this the golden au after Kintsugi, the art of repairing broken things with gold. It's not the same as before but the breaks are part of its beauty

There's a quote I'm fond of that is "

You don't need another Human Being to make your life complete, but let's be honest. Having your wounds kissed by someone who doesn't see them as disasters In your soul, but cracks to put their love into, Is the most calming thing In this World." And damn if luxu doesnt appreciate having a little love poured into his cuts...even if it is followed by stinging antiseptic and some admonishing words.

[txemrn]

Faded

Book/Pairing: The Royal Romance; Leo x Madeleine

Warning: angst (some dark discussion that would give away the plot); smut 🍋 (awkward, NOT sexy); language

Word Count: 3008 (+/-)

Song Inspiration: Faded by Alan Walker ft. Iselin Solheim (lyrics quoted in the text)

A/N: This is a Royal Roulette, technically, but then again, RR was created specifically for Wacky Drabbles, and I just couldn't get the word count down! Oops! Anyway, this idea came to me when I heard this song, and this story needed to be told. Some of it is canon; some of it is creative canon; some of it, well, we'll call it creativity. lol Any and all of these ideas came from my head, but I acknowledge that others have probably written similar stories (purely coincidental).

Huge special thanks to some of my sweet writing friends: @ao719, @charlotteg234, and @kat-tia801. This took a group effort, and I love you ladies so very much for pre-reading and making this story better. And as always, these characters belong to our friends at Pixelberry!

***

He was a rushing wind; my billowing sails drift me into the unknown, but I don’t care. He’s an incinerating inferno: every tradition I was taught was set ablaze by his touch. My caged heart was unlocked by him; he set the monsters running wild inside of me. In my world of propriety and decorum, he taught me to live; more importantly, he dared me to love.

He broke free: from the customs, our culture, the captivity of our world. He broke free.

Without me. And the mess is all mine to clean up, left with only a picture of our passion--a photo of the love we once shared together. But even that is fading, and will be lost.

I’m alone with my thoughts this morning on my walk. The bite of salt in the coastal breeze tickles my nose, inviting my platinum strands into a carefree dance amongst the sunrise. Adjusting my oversized tortoise-shell sunglasses, my bare toes leave the comfort of the white sand beach only to discover the sting of the barnacle laden steps to the stone jetty. But, the shallow waters never met what I needed. My soul craves to commune with the waves from the deep.

I’m lost; there isn’t enough time in the world to think this through, and yet somehow a decision has to be made. God, where are you now? Was it all in my fantasy? Were you imaginary?

Many described our relationship as ‘destiny’--no, not exactly the romance you read about in foolish fairy tales or hear about in silly love songs. Our families ran in the same spheres of wealth and power. Politics. We are royalty. Since we were close in age, we would spend countless hours together throughout our childhood and teenage years. Being the oldest son to the king, he is--well, he was--the crowned prince of Cordonia; an agreement to our nuptials started well-before my formal training specifically for his social season.

But, something was different about Leo and me. We grew quite fond of each other, a friendship that developed into sharing secret kisses in darkened corners. Was this normal for friendships? Or did we have something deeper? Was this love?

As long as I can remember, I was taught my body was not my own; I was born with a greater purpose, and in that purpose, I would bring honor to my family and my name. I would earn my place in history: a woman who gave of herself everything she could for the sake of a country. Even love.

My reputation is to be held in the highest regard. My efforts in style and wardrobe would be subject to conversation and scrutiny. My eloquence and table etiquette could determine whether or not I’d be fit to be a queen. Every eye movement, every smile, every response could bring honor or dishonor to my family. No one cared about me as long as I presented a pristine package to court, a sacrificial lamb for king and country.

But, when the moment came for me to be chosen as his bride, I felt the swelling of joy inside my chest, bursting like strobes of light for everyone to witness. Suddenly the ideas of ‘the one’ and ‘happily ever after’ that I read about in the great classics teased my senses; I wanted to cry, to scream, to laugh. My body had a sudden thirst, a yearning for him that I didn’t understand.

In my innocence, this could only be one thing.

“Countess Madeleine,” he knowingly grins, “will you do me this honor?”

Swallowing thickly, her jade eyes flutter open at the sound of her name. In a handsomely fit tux, adorning his family colors in full regalia, her future husband, the future king of Cordonia, takes a knee to present the stunning canary solitaire. The dread melts away as the butterflies overcome her nerves.

Keeping with propriety, she nods her head while curtly dabbing away tears. But, something is distracting her: she is to be relishing in her accomplishment of winning the honor, for winning all of the glory, for winning the crown. She is to be the next queen of Cordonia.

But she is overwhelmed by all thoughts of him, her husband-to-be, the father to their future children. Suddenly the life she had been training for didn’t matter; she was betrothed and in love.

Smoothing out the tightness of my heathered linen pants, I take a moment to stare at my empty ring finger. I feel soreness from the collection of tears, but I refuse to allow anymore drop on his behalf. Today is hard enough.

I hug my body, remembering the warmth of his intimate touch. I had kept myself pure for him. Until that night.

Within an hour of making his intentions known to the court, Leo scurries away with his future bride, leaving only a trail of giggles and whispers along the way to his chambers.

Shrugging off his jacket, Leo presses her petite body against the locked door. His hand gently cradles her head, his thumb tracing the length of her jaw. His lips hungrily search hers, wolfishly devouring her mouth before she can react.

“Is this okay?” he whispers under his breath, his smoldering gaze entraps her innocent eyes. Breathlessly focused on his swelling lips, she nods her head dutifully.

He places his hands on her waist before sliding them intently back onto the curves of her ass, grabbing at her fullness under her whimper. A growl becomes his breathing, staring at his prey.

“Do you love me, my future queen?”

Love. Was that love?

The hypnotic rise and fall of the waves is starting to sour my stomach, but the ocean spray is so inviting and calming on my clammy skin. Finding a smooth stone, I seek refuge from the surge of the sea’s tantrum. Relaxing under the gentle rays of the morning sunshine, I close my eyes, only to see him.

He cheats her out of her next breath, his tongue overwhelming her mouth. His eager fingers find the zipper to her ballgown. He paws at her back, his fingers brushing against the secret skin of her body.

Her bra tosses to the wayside; admiring his new found treasure, Leo’s hands plunder her supple curves. His mouth plummets to her hardening nipples, his teeth teasing her nerves with fear. The sudden twinge of pleasure thrashes her head against the door.

“Shall I continue, beautiful?” he exhales, catching his breath; but, before an answer is uttered, he stumbles back into the temptation of her perfect body. His fingers tease across the waistband of her petal pink briefs; her eyes cinch closed, her mouth unable to hold back a moan.

“Someone is enjoying themselves,” he chuckles, standing to tower over her. He kisses her cheek, leaning his mouth close to her ear. “Is this what you want?” He tucks a strand behind her ear.

“Mhmm,” her lips curl slightly, leaning into his touch.

“Do you like what I am doing for you?”

“Yes,” she softly groans.

“Yeah?” He reaches into her panties, her knees buckling to the wandering of his fingers. “Mmmm,” he pulls his hand out, licking his fingertips, “that’s my good girl. You love my touch.” He stands back, shaking off her body. Locking his eyes with hers, he casually steps backwards until he reaches the bed. He slides off his belt, unfastening his slacks.

“Come here,” he motions for her to step closer. “Show me your love for me.”

Madeleine’s eyes focus on his growing girth, bulging from his unzipped pants; but, then her gaze darts around the room. Surely he knows that she isn’t well-versed in such endeavors.

“Maddie?” he combs his fingers through her blonde tresses. “I love you. You know that, right?”

She closes her eyes. The words send a jolt of happiness through her veins. She was experiencing love. She was prepared for everything else, but this?

"Then, let me show you,” he growls, pushing her back onto the bed. Hungrily ripping off her panties, he exposes her to his touch. Youthful and pure. "Are you ready?"

He spreads her legs apart, her thighs trembling. She grips the sheets with her tiny fists. Her doe-like eyes stare into his hunting blues as she feels him touch her again; but this time, it wasn't his fingers.

With an inexperienced push of his hips, red flashes before Madeleine's eyes as she squints her eyes in pain, hiding the gathering of tears. He thrusts again; her teeth gnash at the breaking of her body. Her head thrashes back and forth, groaning as she serves a penance under his rhythmic plunges into her warm, narrow core again and again. Harder and harder. Faster. Deeper.

Without warning, the beating of her body stops, leaving her stretched, completely filled with him. Moaning her name in the company of obscenities, his breathing becomes quick and shallow despite his efforts to slow down. Sweat gathers across his brow as he savors the delicate tightness of her depths. Stumbling into his ecstasy, he loses control, pouring himself into her. The sudden rush of fullness makes her whimper, the sting begins to dull as a smile crawls across her face. His lips meet her soft, glowing skin. Finally, it’s over.

That night: it was so long ago. But, I can still feel it; I can still feel him. The smell and taste of him lingers on my tongue. I miss him.

And with that, my breathing labors as I choke out a sob. I press the back of my hand to my lips as tears cloud my vision from the Mediterranean horizon. A sour pang creeps up my throat as I cradle my tender belly with my other hand. Clenching my eyes closed, I hope to hold back the downpour of tears from my soul. God, please not again.

Madeleine's head rests on Leo's shoulder, his strong arm securely around her exposed body. Her marigold diamond catches the pale moonlight perfectly, it's brilliance mesmerizing the bride-to-be as she subtly teeters her hand on his well-structured chest. He suddenly engulfs her hand with his. Turning towards him, her lips meet his perfectly like the final piece of the puzzle, locking seamlessly in place.

"Runaway with me, Madeleine."

The flecks of evergreen in her eyes sparkle with curiosity. "What--?"

"This life, Maddie," he gently rubs her back, "is this really the life that you want-- that you'd want for us?"

She sits up, taken aback from the peculiar question. "You mean the life we're living right now? Us? Being engaged?”

“Yes--I mean, no. I--” Leo stumbles over his words, dragging his hand across his face. “I love you, and I want to be with you--” he pushes a platinum strand behind her ear, “--but do you ever wonder what it’s like out there? Out in the real world? Away from all of this pressure? Away from all of these rules?”

“Away from the public eye? Living life--” she titters into a big smile, “--like everyday people?"

"Yes." He sighs, pressing her hand against his heart. "Before long, we will be in charge. In charge, Maddie. Of an entire country." There is a quake in his voice, a quiver that even makes her feel chilled. "I don’t think I’m cut out for this,” a breath hitches in his chest. “Will I even be a good king?"

“Of course," she whispers, offering a doting smile, “Of course, Leo," her voice becomes stronger, authoritative. “You can do this. You were made for this. And while, yes, you are the king, you’re not alone.” She laces her fingers with his. “You’ll always have me. You have my support--” she kisses the back of his hand, “and most of all, you have my love.” She leans down to kiss his hand again, but rather he captures her in his arm, bringing her to his lips, making her squeal.

“I love you, Madeleine.”

She moans into his pout as he kisses her once more. “I love you, too, Leo.”

The creaminess to his baritone voice dissipates from my memory, fading away much like our love. How could I have been so foolish? I gave him everything--I promised him everything. My life, my whole existence was for him, and I naively thought that love would somehow stitch us together, that somehow we would be the monarchs that did have it all. Wealth. Power. Love. A happily-ever-after that could join the rankings of the greatest love stories ever told.

But, it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough.

The sudden rapping on the door abruptly wakes Madeleine from a deep sleep. The sunlight pours mercilessly through the windows as she grabs the sheets to cover herself.

The door suddenly tramples open, Constantine bounding first into the room, followed by his head guard Bastien. “Where is he? Where’s Leo?” The king sneers as the blonde trips out of bed, reaching for clothing. “For God’s sakes, couldn’t you two show some fucking self-control?”

Madeleine cinches the high-thread-count sheet around her body, leaving her slender shoulders and décolleté exposed. As a blush crawls across her face, the question begins to haunt her: where is Leo? He wasn’t in bed this morning. In fact, his clothes are missing from their disheveled heap that was next to her discarded dress. His watch and cell phone were missing from the bedside table. But, otherwise everything seemed to be in place.

Madeleine rushes to the ensuite bathroom, hoping to find a logical clue to Leo’s whereabouts there.

"Call him. Now," the king growls at the anxious countess.

"He's not answering us, Countess Madeleine. We assume given your current relationship with his majesty--" Madeleine nods in understanding.

"I'm sorry, but the phone number you're trying to reach has been disconnected or is no longer in service."

Her eyebrows furrow as she ends the call. "I--I--I don't understand," she stammers, rubbing her forehead with her fingers. "His phone has been disconnected--"

"Fucking ungrateful--” growls Constantine, ripping the phone from Madeleine's tiny hand, “--selfish son of a bitch!" He throws the phone against the wall, shattering it into pieces. He gruffly turns towards his future daughter-in-law. “Are you certain you dialed the right number?" He spits. Madeleine braces herself against a wall, turning her face away from him. She carefully nods, refusing to make eye contact. “Unbelievable!” Constantine knocks over some antique silver candelabras before exiting the room, leaving Bastien behind.

“Sir?’ Madeleine quietly calls to the guard, drawing closer to him, ensuring her body is covered. “What is all the commotion about? Where is Leo?”

“Leo failed to report to his morning engagements about last night festivities. According to our cameras, he left this morning through the northwest gate in an unmarked black Sudan around o’four hundred hours.”

Madeleine cups her mouth as she stumbles to sit down on the bed. She nervously combs her fingers through her tangled tresses. “What does this mean?” She spouts nervously, her body shaking with tears gathering in her eyes.

“Please try not to worry, ma’am,” Bastien carefully places a comforting hand on her bare shoulder, quickly withdrawing it when their eyes awkwardly meet at the gesture. “Um--” he clears his throat, “--I don’t know what he’s doing, but we will find him.” He turns on his heel to leave Madeleine alone when suddenly a thought hits him. “By any chance, did he mention anything to you?”

‘Runaway with me, Madeleine.’ One simple request. He asked me to just simply follow him. I thought he was joking or simply making a hypothetical request due to his uneasy nerves; but, my love for him aside, this was my calling: to serve him. If I had chosen to honor him rather than challenge him… if I had chosen to remind him of responsibility and duty rather than trying to win him over with ludicrous ideas of love in marriage…

Leo abdicated the throne.

No one speaks about royalty relinquishing their responsibilities. We’re born into this; we were made to do this. We spend our entire lives preparing, being told that it is an honor to bear such greatness, it is an honor to host such power. No one speaks of the alternative. Truth be told: if we knew there was a way to escape, to renounce such a life as this, how many of us would take that chance?

It’s been seven weeks since that awful morning. Seven weeks of silence and darkness. Seven weeks of broken dreams and false hope. Seven weeks of only one absolution: Leo had found his freedom. He wasn't coming back.

I pull out the photograph of our love just one more time as the tears gather once more in my eyes. Leo’s last words to me were ‘I love you;’ but somehow as I trace my fingers amongst the black and white print, I have to say, ‘goodbye’ for both of us this morning.

“Ms. Amaranth?”

“Yes, ma’am?” Madeleine wakes from her daydream, her voice trembling. She chews incessantly on her nails as her crossed legs bounce nervously. The sterile white walls around her seem to be closing in around her; the air grows thick, stifling. “I’m sorry. What did you say?”

The dark brunette stands to come closer to the blonde. She straightens out her white coat while fixing an endearing smile on her face. She sits down next to Madeleine, taking her hand. “I asked if you are sure about this decision?”

If Madeleine had learned anything in the past two months, it's that she could only be sure about nothing. She stares at her bobbing toe, hypnotically entranced with the clicking of the clock in the exam room.

“There are other options," the doctor continues. "Adoption. Keeping the baby.”

I tear up the ultrasound picture in my hands, letting the wind chase it to the sea. The tattered pieces drift for a place to rest, sinking to the depths my soul will forever crave, a secret place far too precious for this world. For my world.

Goodbye, love.

***

Tag List (please please please let me know if you need to be added or removed!): @ao719 @bbrandy2002 @burnsoslow @charlotteg234 @chemist-ana @choiceskatie @dcbbw @forallthatitsworth @gkittylove99 @glaimtruelovealways @iaminlovewithtrr @jessiembruno @kat-tia801 @khoicesbyk @lovelyladyk88 @lucy-268 @mainstreetreader @neotericthemis @nestledonthaveone @phoenixrising308 @sfb123 @shannonwrote @shewillreadyou @taniasethi @texaskitten30 @thefrenchiemama @twinkleallnight @yourmajesty09

[yujikuna]

Bea, tell me about Kags and why you love him. Help me fall in love with him. I think I’m right at the edge because I see you post about him so much lol

KAIT. kait. my beloved kageyama. he is so dear to my heart and soul. when i think about kageyama i think of like, the most pure and simple love imaginable in all aspects of his life.

i think, as a character, one of my favorite parts about kageyama is getting to seeing him grow as a person through doing the thing he loves most which makes sense because for kageyama, volleyball is THE most important thing to him. it's his life. like it really truly is. from the time he could hold onto a volleyball it has been so ingrained into every inch of his life that he really doesn't know what to do without it. which makes his time at kitagawa daiichi so much sadder to think about for me.

kageyama just... loves so deeply and purely to me? but he's someone who definitely doesn't know how to show that love and he comes off as harsh and abrasive (which he is at first glance) and that's why he's one of the most misunderstood hq characters imo. but i think that that pure love he has for what few things he DOES love comes out in the sacrifices he makes and his willingness to shoulder every burden in order to keep them. kageyama loves volleyball SO MUCH that as a child, he would completely forgo getting the game winning service ace just because he didn't want to stop playing.

and as he gets older, we know that he struggles with expressing himself, and we know that he starts to lose the person who he felt like understood him the most. and he gets to that stage in volleyball where it’s no longer “oh i’ll mess up this serve so the game will last longer” but “if i don’t do everything i can to win this very game then i don’t get to do the one thing i love anymore.” and that mentality is both one of kageyama’s greatest assets but the thing that ends up causing him SO much pain because the poor guy just... didn’t know how to communicate his motivations effectively.

so kageyama sacrificing a few serves in elementary school ended up turning into middle school him feeling like if HE wasn’t the one to do absolutely everything, if HE wasn’t the one to push the people around him to be the best, to match HIM, because he knew his own talent, then he wouldn’t be able to play anymore. which as we know, backfired spectacularly, and ended up with him being pulled from the game at a time where volleyball was the only thing he felt like he had. he had no friends, he didn’t have a rival like he wanted because oikawa just hated his guts and didn’t even want to play with him, he didn’t have his grandpa, and he didn’t have volleyball. my poor baby. 

but this is why his time at karasuno and with hinata is so important and wonderful and amazing because they taught him that just because he has the ABILITY to do everything, he really really can’t because that’s not how you play volleyball!! but something really interesting happens because kageyama TRIES to not be the “king of the court” and he TRIES to be a goody two shoes like atsumu said he was, but that’s not who he is. because he’s a really damn good volleyball player, and he’s a setter for a reason. so kageyama’s volleyball goes from “i’ll sacrifice a few serves to play longer” to “i’ll do whatever i can to push the people around me no matter what so that i can stay on the court the longest” to “i’ll shove who i really am deep down inside because that part of me apparently is Not Okay and i just want to play volleyball” to “i am me and i am a strong player but i also have five other players with me on the court at all times so i have to do the best that i can to bring out THEIR best so that WE can stay on the court the longest” and that’s just SO SO SO good to me.

i think that that just like, pure and simple yet strong love he has for volleyball applies to every other aspect of his life. like sure, he’s a little dumb when it comes to everything besides volleyball, and he’s not very good at expressing himself, and his love life probably consists of staring from across the room and not knowing if he should approach the person or not, and he worries that animals are afraid of him. but he finds people who love him because of his intensity and dedication and not in spite of it. and he grows up and gets to do what he loves for a living. and i just think that’s amazing!!!!!

also he’s hot.

[chiliiscereal]

Too tall part 2

Raph x tall! Fem! Reader

——-

So here we are again lol I liked writing it so here’s part two!

——-

“Yeah he was a douchebag.” You agreed, tapping the seat nervously. Sure you were glad to have conversation but it didn’t need to be any info dumping. Quickly, you turned the conversation back around to him. “You kept calling yourself a monster earlier. Do you guys get called that a lot?”

You could easily see the nervous expression on his face shift to something more... bitter.

“You could say that.” He grunted.

Immediately you felt bad. It makes sense that he’s get called that. To be honest, the word ran through your head when he and his brother fell from the roof. But to call someone that to their face? That’s cold.

You straightened up, desperate to fix what you’d said. “I personally don’t see it. Well, other than you guys breaking my phone that is.”

He looked up at you with a glare, only for it to melt slightly when he noticed the grin on your face.

“Who knows, maybe that perv was on his way back with a few friends and you guys dropping down was exactly what I needed to get rid of him.” You shrugged, watching his golden eyes intently. Sure you just met him but you needed him to have the right impression, even if you might not see him again.

“Maybe.” Was all he offered.

Well, maybe sitting in the quiet was better. Running your mouth might have the wrong effect.

“Got a pretty good punch.” He commented after a moment of silence. He wasn’t sure what else he should say but he didn’t exactly want the conversation to die... purely because it would be awkward. “You...uh... you box at all?”

You examined the hand he’d previously wrapped, grateful you weren’t the only one talking. “No just had to learn to beat up guys when they messed with my friends. I’d like to in the future though.” You cleared your throat nervously. “Do you? Do you box?”

He nodded. “Yeah, a bit.”

You nodded as well. “Very cool.”

The conversation began to dwindle again so he picked it back up.

“If ya’d like... I could show ya a few moves.” He immediately regretted offering the moment he spoke. He.... he couldn’t help it! What was wrong with him? You’d said a few words he’d never heard before! That was it! And... well, you also cracked a few jokes with him... denied him being a monster... hell you even apologized to him. Apologies weren’t things he got often. “If ya ever in need ‘a course.” He covered himself quickly. “Got lots a spare time an’ a punchin’ bag.”

You blinked in surprise. A giant, mutant, teenage turtle... was offering you boxing lessons?

Raph mentally kicked himself for saying that. “Neva’ mind ya probably got other places to be-.”

“I’d like that.” You sat up a bit. “It’s not everyday that I get offered a boxing lesson by a mutant hero.”

The term ‘mutant hero’ threw him off. He was used to ‘monster’ or simply being referred to as ‘giant turtle’. But ‘mutant hero’? That was a title he could get behind.

“Can’t have ya goin’ around breakin’ the skin on your knuckles again.” He clarified quickly, gaining a bit of confidence back. “An’ I noticed that ya had your thumb in your fist when ya hit the guy. Coulda broken it.”

You snorted. “Yeah I wasn’t exactly thinking about that when he attacked me.”

“Impressive though.” He commented. “Thought we’d have to jump in an’ save ya.”

“Instead you jumped in after I did all the hard work and broke my phone.” You raised an eyebrow jokingly.

He looked down in embarrassment. “Yeah you can blame Mikey for that. Dumbass wanted to make bets about how long it would take for you to take the guy down.”

You flushed a bit at the thought of them watching you take your rage out on the creep. “I don’t really know what to say to that.”

He nodded, not really knowing what to say either. He was new to the whole conversation thing. Usually Mikey or Leo carried the conversations.

“Well looks like you’re all good.” He leaned back once he finished wrapping your hands. “Guess you can get your phone and we’ll get outta your hair.”

You stood up, backing up a bit when he did to. Man he really towered over people. “Well, except when I come back for that boxing lesson.”

He was surprised to be honest. You really wanted to come back?

You pointed your finger at him jokingly. “I’m holding you to it. You offered and there’s no backing out now.”

“Yeah... sounds like a plan.”

——

It was a plan indeed.

In fact, it became the plan for almost every afternoon.

You brought over your homework to finish up (with Donnie insisting he could help), chatted a bit with Splinter (he loved having new company), finally got to the boxing lesson (your favorite part), and then played video games with Mikey to cool down.

You had to admit, you were nervous the first few times you came over. They were to. You, of course, cracked many nervous jokes and accidentally made far too many cookies on your first trip back. You were excited and scared! Food was then way to peoples hearts right? They seemed nice and this was a once in a lifetime opportunity to make out of the ordinary friends.

They’d definitely been surprised when you showed up with about 3 tons of chocolate chip cookies but they were teenagers; it was eaten within the hour.

In your opinion it helped you break the ice. It was hard enough to find things in common when they’re completely different species! Cookies had become the common ground.

Being different species wasn’t the only thing. They were HUGE! For once you were the shortest out of everyone in the room.

Well, until you met April.

She’d been talked up so much that you couldn’t wait to meet the girl that helped them save New York.

She barely went to your shoulder.

But you two got along. Sure she was an adult and it was a bit awkward that she was smaller than you, but you managed. In fact you even liked having someone smaller than you around when you were with them. It made you feel more... normal.

“I was a bit awkward the first time I came here to.” She admitted as you two sat on the couch. You two were supposed to be trying to figure out calculus but it was fruitless. “They’re just so... huge!”

You nodded as you erased your work. “Yeah, I’m used to being the tall one. But now it’s like I’m gonna get stepped on!”

“Well you’re pretty tall yourself.” She waved it off. “Does that ever give you any trouble?”

You set down you pencil with a sigh. “A bit. It’s... hard to find a guy that will like all 6 feet and 4 inches of me.”

April shook her head. “Psh. Men. What do they know.”

“Absolutely Nothing.” You grinned. “The only thing they know is that they like small girls.”

“Eh, I can think of a few guys that like tall girls.” She hinted slightly, disappointed when you didn’t seem to notice. “You’d just have to... branch out.”

You shrugged and leaned back on the couch. “I’ve tried that.”

“Maybe you just need a different... angle.” She held up her hands to fully frame your face. “Maybe there’s a reaaaaally tall guy out there for you. Someone who won’t care that you’re 6 foot 4 inches.”

You snorted, wrinkling your nose at her. “Yeah, let me know when a seven foot guy shows up in New York. Preferably, he has to be my age, and my type.”

Just then, Raph walked into the room. “Done chattin’ it up or are ya gonna go for another hour?”

You jumped. “What in the hot tater tots, dude!” You put your hand over your beating chest as if that would calm your heart down. “I get that you’re a ninja but come on! You’re gonna give me a heart attack showing up out of nowhere like that!

“Ya gonna box or what?” He rolled his eyes, mentally facepalming himself.

You weren’t like his brothers.

You weren’t even like him.

He had to be more careful. But he wouldn’t make it obvious of course. Stealth was clearly his thing.

You rolled your eyes right back at him, grateful that he was at a point where he felt he could joke with you. “Can you let my soul return to my body first?”

He frowned, unsure of what that meant. “Uhh... you okay?”

You jumped up off the couch, breath finally caught. “Alright I’m good. I’d rather get another lesson in then have to deal with calculus anymore.” You kicked your notebook a bit.

“You could... I don’t know... get Donnie to help ya with it?” He offered half heartedly.

You shook your head. “Nah, I’d rather do boxing with you.” You patted his arm as you passed him on your way to the training area. “Let’s go!”

His face flushed immediately.

Shit.

April raised an eyebrow from the couch. “Damn. You got it bad don’t you?”

Double shit.

He glared at her as the blush on his face grew hotter. “Shut up. Don’t know what the hell youre talkin’ about.”

She pursed her lips and tried not to laugh. “Of course. Just can’t help but notice that you never offered me any boxing lessons. Strange.”

He turned before he could get anymore embarrassed. “I don’t know what you’re on but you’re dead wrong.” And with that, he left.

———

“So these are your katanas?” You asked leo curiously, holding the weapons as gentle as possible. He’d let you look at them while you waited for Raph to show up. Never did you think he’d let you actually touch the blades.

He did, however, stand cautiously next to you. “Yeah, Master splinter gave them to me. Wanna see a few moves?”

You nodded eagerly. “Maybe when I’m actually good at boxing you can teach me some as well.”

You watched as he swing the blades with ease, talking you through each move and it’s purpose.

“Mikey, I’m NOT using my tech to fit every cheese and meat in the world into one pizza!” Donnie stated firmly, walking in with his younger brother right on his tail.

“Why not?” He begged. “It would be genius! We could offer it to the world! Give it our blessing!”

“The world wouldn’t take it from us.” Donnie rolled his eyes.

“Then we give it to Y/n in our honor!” He gestured to you. “She could give our gift to the world.”

“The world don’t want no gift of ours.” Raph commented, finally walking in.

You perked up immediately, altho you were unsure why.

“That’s why we label it as y/n’s” Mikey protested.

“I’m not gonna argue with you about this!” Donnie brushes past him and you.

“Then just say yes!” Mikey exclaimed, accidentally shouldering you.

Now these guys are pretty big. When they shoulder someone, they really move them out of the way.

And unfortunately, out of the way was closer to where Leo was practicing with his katanas.

“Shit!” You hissed quickly when you realized how close you were.

You’d have been chopped up into finely slice pieces if not for the arms that wrapped around you and moved you away quickly. Your feet left the floor before you could even realize what was going on. All you could feel was your back pressed against something solid and hands at your waist.

“Mikey watch where you’re goin’!” Raph shouted, setting you down gently.

“Sorry bro!” He called over his shoulder.

You took a deep breath and squeezed your eyes shut, trying not to stumble when your feet touched the floor. “Wow, that was a little too close for my liking.”

“Ya good there, short stuff?

At this, your eyes flew open. “Short stuff? Excuse me?”

He saw absolutely no problem with the name. “What?”

You placed your hands at your hips. “Never, in all my years, have I been called short stuff.”

He snorted. “Get used to it. Around here, you ARE short stuff.”

You narrowed your eyes at him as he prepared the boxing gloves. How was he so casual about this?? You were never talked to like that! “If I were in the human world, I’d be treated with respect because I tower over all the underlings.” You attempted to joke to cover up your surprise.

He found your reaction... amusing. You reacted better than he thought you would actually. “Well you’re the only underling here, SHORT STUFF.”

You tensed, so very very VERY unused to nicknames. “Come on, you can’t make an exception for human standards of height?”

You didn’t hate it, you just hated that it caught you off guard. Being off guard was the last thing you wanted.

“Nope.” He tossed you a pair of boxing gloves. “Now let’s get to it.”

———-

Why did that name make you feel so... giddy? You couldn’t help but play that scene over and over in your head as you sat at the lunch table with your friends. Was this how all your friends felt when they got called stuff like that? Was this what you’d been missing out on?

And you’d never been picked up before. Not like all the other girls in your grade had.

It was strange... and you liked it.

“Hey, again, I’m sorry about what happened.” Your friend apologized. “I know it’s been a month already but it’s clearly eating you up!” She took your hand understandingly. “I know that whenever this happens you lock yourself away but I’m here for you.”

You snapped back to the land of the living. “Oh! Actually... I’ve been fine!” It was almost like you hadn’t had time to be sad about what happened when that guy stood you up. Like other stuff took his place in your head.

She frowned at you. “Are you sure?”

You nodded, a smile creeping on to your face. “Positive.”

She gasped suddenly. “Oh my goodness. You met someone didn’t you?!” She shook your arm before you could answer. “Don’t deny it! Who are they? What’s their name??”

You shook her off. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” But your blushing face said otherwise.

“I don’t believe you.” She pursed her lips. “Can I just have a name? Does he go to our school?”

You snorted. “Dude, I don’t like him. He’s just a friend I’ve been talking to lately. He’s been giving me boxing lessons-.”

“Oh my goodness you two are basically married now.”

“Wait what?”

“Personal lessons? Girl he’s got it bad!”

Her words stuck with you the whole day. Even when you walked into the lair that afternoon. They spun in circles like a loop, playing over and over.

Psh you didn’t have feelings for Raph!

No way.

And he had a bad for you? No. No, your friend just misread the whole situation.

Just friends, as you’d been for the past month or so.

But the moment you walked in and saw him... you weren’t too sure.

He glanced up at you and then back at his phone. “Hey, you’re here early.”

You shrugged, setting your bag down. “Didn’t feel like heading home right away.”

“Donnies in his lab area if you’re gonna do more a’ that math shit.” He offered, eyes not leaving his phone screen.

“Actually I don’t have any homework today.” You started slowly. “And if you’re not busy...” you waited to see if he would catch on. You continued when he didn’t, “then could we skip ahead to the boxing?”

Now he looked up. “Really?”

“Yeah.”

He attempted to cover his reaction. “I mean, yeah I got time I guess.”

“Alright, then let’s get some water and get started?”

“Sounds good to me.”

Mikey, Leo, and master splinter were all in the kitchen.

“Hey didn’t hear ya come in!” Mikey grinned, patting your shoulder.

You jolted at the strength he put behind it, unready.

“Ay watch it.” Raph ordered, guiding you slightly away from Mikey.

It was just that he didn’t want Mikey to hit you too hard. Because... then you’d give up boxing too soon for the day. And then he’d have nothing else to do.

“It’s fine.” You waved him off, flushing a bit as you uncapped your water bottle. “Can I get through guys?”

Unfortunately Leo and Raph had started an arguement about the way Raph handled Mikeys action and now no one was really letting you get to the sink.

“Fine I’ll do it myself.” You tried to go around Raph, and succeeded. He backed away immediately when he saw that you had moved. But getting around Leo and Mikey? Not so successful.

With Leo’s strictness turned to Mikey, the two began arguing.

You tried to dodge them but Mikey took a step back.

“Oh my goodness your brothers aren’t making this easy.” You complained to Raph.

“Tell me about it.” He rolled his eyes. Suddenly.. he got an idea. “C’mon short stuff.” He grabbed you and set you on his shoulders so you wouldn’t get squished by one of his idiot brothers.

“Holy shit!” You squeaked suddenly. Now it was you that towered above everyone else. “Should I get used to you grabbing me randomly or is this only a temporary thing?” You held onto his shell as he shouldered past his brothers.

“Possibly.” He shrugged, “but it’s funnier if ya don’t.”

You hit his shoulder. “So you’re doing this for FUN??”

“That, and you gettin’ hit by Leo or Mikey would be an inconvenience.”

Wow where was all this joking coming from?

“Then I guess I gotta stop reacting.”

————

From then on it was a contest.

He would move you randomly out of the way and you’d do your best not to react.

You never did get used to it but he didn’t need to know that.

He never gave you any warnings either, which didn’t help.

You’d be standing in the tv area and he’d pick you up and move you out of his way, smirking while he walked by if he got a reaction.

You had fun with it though. It was fun... and you enjoyed having something like that in your friendship.

You flopped down on your couch after your hard day at school. Today you had no boxing lesson planned and only a few chapters to read. You WERE planning on relaxing by yourself but...

Mikey sent you a message.

Shreks_love_child: hey are you planning on coming over?

You frowned at it. Didn’t he know you had the day off?

You: I’m just going to relax at home today

Shreks_love_child: could you do that another day and come over? Raph’s in a mood

You: why would me coming over help anything? And why is he in a mood?

Shreks_love_child: no reason. He just doesn’t yell as much when you’re around

That wasn’t true... was it?

With a bit of thought, you responded back.

You: fine I’ll be there in a bit. But you better give me a better explanation when I get there. AND you owe me

“Mom I’m headed to my friends house!” You shouted, slipping on your shoes and heading out there door before she could make you do something like doing the dishes before you left.

You walked down the street, enjoying the scenery.

Why would Raph be in a mood?

And why would you being there make it better?

Well Mikey better have a good reason.

Just as you were about to come upon the sewer lid that lead you to their home, you recognized a person walking your way...

...the same guy that had stood you up.

His eyes widened when he seemed to recognize you to. “Hey, Y/n!” He shouted.

Nope.

Nope nope nope.

You began walking faster, turning the corner and heading towards the lid quickly. You had to act fast. You absolutely did NOT want to get caught face to face with him.

You lowered yourself and placed to too heavy lid over yourself as fast as possible, moments before he turned the corner.

You let out a sigh of relief.

Dumbass. Why has he wanted to talk? He made it clear how he felt and what he thought.

Whatever. You didn’t need to think about him now.

You could already hear the sound of shouting.

“Mikey I told ya not to touch it! It’s not finished and ya coulda broken it!”

You made your way down the ladder and through the tunnels quickly. From the sounds of it, Mikey was close to being murdered.

“I’m sorry! You left it on the counter dude! I didn’t know what it was!”

You rounded the next corner, coming face to face with two defensive turtle boys. Raph held a small object protectively in his hands and his brother backed away.

“That don’t mean ya gotta mess with it!”

“I already apologized bro!”

“Apologies are shit! Ya got pizza sauce all over it!”

You cleared your throat, letting yourself be known.

Both of them turned to you immediately.

Relief washed over mikeys face. “Hey! It’s y/n! Whatcha doin’ here angel cakes?” He rushed over quickly, practically standing behind you to protect himself from his older brother. “Today was your day off! Huh. Well now you’re here, right?”

You rolled your eyes at him, moving your attention to Raph.

His whole demeanor had changed. He no longer looked ready to kill. Instead he stood up straighter and held whatever the object was behind his back. “Why ya here?” He asked with a frown. “Today was the day off.”

You decided to not give Mikey an even harder time than he was having and not rat him out. “Thought maybe I’d just hang out with you guys if that’s okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah I’m cool with it.” He narrowed his eyes at Mikey as if he suspected what he’d done. Unfortunately he couldn’t hurt him in front of you so he turned his attention away from his younger brother.

“Cool cool.” You nodded as well. “Wanna watch a movie or something?” You leaned closer a bit to see what he had in his hands.

“Yeah, just let me go get my... my phone from my room.” He closed his fist over the object and moved aside.

“Whatcha hiding?” You raised a brow at him. “Candy?”

“Not hiding anything.”

You followed him to his room with a smirk. “If it’s candy you gotta share.”

“Nope. Not candy.” His face darkened as he grew embarrassed about the possibility of being caught before it was ready. “Just go wait on the couch.”

You rolled your eyes and held up your hands in surrender. “Fine. But I hope the shame of candy hoarding follows you forever.” You turned on your heel and walked to the couch.

Just as you sat down, your phone buzzed.

Hey, I just wanted to apologize for what happened. Are we good?

The absolute audacity. That guy ignored you for practically five months! And now he was apologizing? And he wasn’t even giving you a good reason??

You wrinkled your nose at the screen as if it were his face.

It was a stupid idea I just wasn’t ready for anything serious

You shut your phone off and tried to swallow the temptation of throwing it at the wall.

You know it’s rude to ignore people right?

The phone hit the brick wall with a thud.

It had an otter box case it was fine.

You took a deep breath and held your face in your hands, elbows resting on your knees.

“You good, short stuff?”

You groaned into your hands. “Just let me die.”

Raph frowned, unsure of what to say. One moment you were excited and bugging him. Now you looked like someone stole your dog.

“Somethin’ wrong?”

You sat up furiously. “Yeah this dipshit guy keeps texting me!” You paced the room, snatching up your phone as you went. “He stood me up the night I first met you guys and now he wants to talk?? And he’s calling me rude for not responding!” You shook your phone angrily. “Either I’m gonna die or he is!”

“The douchebag?” Raph attempted to clarify. “Ya still got his number?”

“I didn’t have time to delete it.” You admitted. “I got so caught up with you guys! And then he tried to talk to me on the way here!” You sat down beside him with a huff. “Fighting crime is your thing right? You think it’s justified if I run to his house and kill him? Would you stop me?”

“Wouldn’t try very hard.” He huffed. “He’s a dipshit. Don’t see what’s right in front a’ him.”

Crap out of room. To be continued!

@sophiedoodles-blog @fanlovedlt

[thechangeling]

Out of our heads Out of our minds

So evil writer brain decided to cook up and incredibly toxic kitty fic because apparently I'm a terrible person lol. Blame @ilikebooks8 for letting this see the light of day.

The title is based on the song Out of this world by Bush.

Cw: slightly nsfw, violence, cheating, incredibly toxic behavior, beloved characters making bad choices, and implied sex.

Kit returns.

He returns to Ty with the same dazzling smile and charming witt, only now he seems to have grown even more impossibly beautiful as time has passed.

Now he's all hard lines and defined muscles and piercing sinful blue eyes that make Ty so angry he could scream.

Kit laughs and Ty wants to tear his insides out. Wants to rip Kit's heart right out if his chest just like he did to Ty. The painful gnawing rage of a betrayal that still stings after all this time. And yet still, Ty heard Kit was in danger and he came running like a man obsessed.

Ty knows deep down now matter how angry he is, he could never let anything happen to Kit. Nothing permanent anyways. Sometimes when the ache becomes to difficult to bare, Ty imagines punching that stupid smirk right off of his face. Or choking him hard enough to leave bruises. Of course Ty would never actually do such a thing. The sight of Kit in pain, any sort of pain is just too unbearable.

And that's the worst part. No matter how angry Ty gets he knows it can't last. And no matter how painful it is to be near Kit again, he still feels this unexplainable pull. This whispering in his ear to get closer and closer. To reach out and touch.

But it's stupid, and it's wrong anyways because Ty already has someone. Anush who was by his side the whole time at the scholomance and has never betrayed him. Anush who is sweet and thoughtful and gorgeous. Ty should be happy. After all, wasn't this what he always wanted? Someone to be there for him?

So he tried to distract himself from Kit by throwing himself into spending time with Anush and working the case. That's all Kit was now, just the latest problem to solve. A supernatural disaster. They would save him and stop the oncoming war and everything would be fine.

And then Kit would be gone. Blind panic teared at Ty's insides at the thought. There were these moments with Kit where they would make eye contact, or they would bump into each other in the kitchen and their fingers would brush and Ty would just desperately want to wrap Kit in his arms again.

He wanted to ask if Kit had really meant what he said that day on the beach. Sometimes when Kit stared at him with that soft sad smile on his face Ty wondered if they were going through similar things. Sometimes Ty wanted to tell him that he wished he had never met Kit either.

Kit Herondale was dangerous and unpredictable and loving him was like holding a live wire. But funnily enough the same could probably be said about Ty. Especially lately.

He felt like he was constantly in pain. Like his body ached with invisible wounds that made it impossible to breathe. The world was brutal and unforgiving, berating him with constant noise and blinding lights jabbing hot pokers into his brain. And the people with their sickly sweet smiles as they demanded he bare his soul.

But what if there was nothing left anymore? What if his soul had died with Livvy? Ty tried to cling onto the things that made him feel better. He hid away in his favorite spot, listening to his favorite music and pouring over Sherlock. Repeating the words to himself over and over again like they could pull him out of this tailspin. Ty distracted himself with Anush's sweet kisses and wandering hands as he tried to turn his brain off for once in his life.

But his soul was screaming out for another person to be the one touching him. He wanted Kit and that was infuriating. It made no logical sense. Not only was Kit responsible for breaking his heart but he also was notorious for playing fast and loose with his own life. Ty couldn't spend all his time constantly feeling like his heart was living outside of his body. Constantly in danger of being ripped open by some dark and evil thing.

Ty had everything he thought he wanted. But it still wasnt enough.

During another sleepless night, Ty found himself wandering the institutes halls. At this point he was simply just overtired. Too many nights spent worrying or studying or reading instead of sleeping. Now his body doesn't remember how to rest. Ty was far too exhausted to operate on logic or reason so he found himself standing outside of Kit's door, wondering absentmindedly how he got there.

Ty placed his hand against the door, fighting the urge to open it and walk through. He can remember the first time he waited outside of Kit's door, just like it was yesterday. He had no idea at the time why he was so drawn to the mysterious boy who had shown up at the institute after Ty had threatened him with a knife. The boy who turned out to be a lost Herondale. And honestly after all of this time Ty still couldn't explain it.

This is a bad idea, He thought to himself as he slowly turned the doorknob. This is a terrible idea. Ty, driven by pure need like fire under his skin, pushed the door open.

Kit was awake as Ty suspected he would be, sitting by the window and staring out into the night sky. Under the moonlight he was glowing. He turned around to stare at Ty, first with a look of shock, and then that same hallow desperation Ty had been seeing on Kit's face lately.

He also looked angry.

"What the hell are you doing in here Ty?" He sounded exhausted. Ty almost felt guilty in a sense. He stared at Kit for a moment, unsure of what to say.

"I don't know," he whispered, staring at the ground. "I suppose I was compelled." Ty let his gaze slowly rise up Kit's body, drinking it in.

Kit scoffed harshly. "Compelled? By what exactly, Tiberius?"

Ty looked up at Kit's face in surprise. He rarely called Ty by his full name. Ty really didn't like how it felt. Cold and distant. Ty sighed, pushing his fingertips against his collarbone and tracing it slightly.

"I don't know. I guess I just needed to know. I need to know why you left me." Ty tried not to let himself sound desperate or weak, but he had become worn down by this point. He couldn't keep up his defenses much longer.

"Why didn't you want me?" He muttered. "Why wasn't I good enough?"

And there it was. The painful truth that Ty had been avoiding. The fact that Kit had tossed him aside just like so many had before. Like Paige. Like his father. He had always tried so hard to make people happy. To live up to their expectations. But in the end it didn't matter how hard he tried, sometimes there was just no pleasing certain people.

Sometimes it seemed like there was no point in being good and following the rules if nothing ever changed. If Ty always ended up in the same place. If people always saw him as a problem or an inconvenience or worse, then he could just live up to their expectations. Be selfish and cold and cruel because no amount of begging and smiling was going to earn him respect.

Kit glared at him in shock. "Who the hell do you think you are? Coming in here to play mind games with me?" Before Ty could register what was happening, Kit was storming towards him and shoving him up against the wall with a loud thunk.

The feeling of Kit touching him again after all this time was dizzying. Kit was shorter then him so he needed to crane his neck a little to look up at Ty, which meant that his throat was completely exposed for Ty to stare at.

"I told you how I felt and you did nothing! You ignored me!" Kit cried. "I wanted you more then I've ever wanted anything Ty! I still do!" Tears were streaming down his face. Ty stared at Kit, completely frozen. His wrists were pinned to the wall by Kit's hands and their faces were inches apart.

Ty struggled to collect himself. "I didn't know what was going on," he gasped out shakily. "I was a mess Kit. I just had to get her back. But-." He cut himself off. It was all for nothing. Ty had lost Livvy in the end and he had lost Kit as well.

Ty shook his head. "Does this mean that you love me?" His voice sounded so far away. Like the words were being pulled from some unexpected place within him. Kit let out a soft gasp and squeezed his eyes shut before fixing his expression into a blank slate. He leaned forward slightly so that their lips were just barely touching, then gently trailed his mouth across Ty's cheek to his ear.

Ty felt him smirk slightly before Kit whispered in his ear. "Go to sleep Ty. Go back to your boyfriend."

And before Ty had time to think, he was lashing out. He shoved Kit backwards as hard as he could with a snarl. Kit went flying across the room and slammed into the opposite wall. If Kit had been human it probably would have knocked him out. Ty stared in horror at what he had done as Kit clutched his ribs and groaned.

"You seriously have some anger management issues!" Kit snapped at him, glaring pointedly. Ty knew that. When he was younger he used to have fits of uncontrollable rage all the time. Words didnt come easily to him so he would hit, scratch, bite or throw whatever was closest to make people realize he was in pain. When he wanted to say "don't touch me" or "you hurt my feelings" but he just could make the words form properly, he would get angry. And then he would lash out.

Ty thought he had been getting better at managing his emotions and communicating. But there was something about Kit Herondale that just evaporated every last bit of logic and reason he had until all that was left was the urge to scream.

Ty gaped in shock, searching for the right thing to say. "By the angel Kit, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do that I swear!" He pleaded. His fingers were beginning to shake and flutter at his sides. He tapped desperately against his thigh, scratching at the material of his sweatpants to try and calm himself down.

Kit just shook his head and laughed humourlessly. "Honestly Ty, we should just tell the Seelie Queen not to worry. And Janus, and all the other people who want the first heir dead. You'll destroy me just fine on your own." He gaze was piercing and ruthless.

Ty's breathing was frantic and erratic as he shook in agony. He could feel he was on the urge of a meltdown.

Kit pulled himself to his feet. He stared at Ty longingly and then smiled slightly. A genuine smile. "But honestly what a way to go. Does that answer your question sweetheart?"

Ty gasped soundlessly, his hands shaking at his sides. He fought to get a hold of himself. Kit studied Ty for a moment, then slowly began to approach him.

"Why are you here Ty? Why did you come here exactly?" Kit was speaking in a soft lulling voice as if he was trying to hypnotize Ty.

"I'm here because I miss you," Ty admitted. "It's confusing. Because I'm still mad at you. But I can't stop thinking about you." Ty felt as though he was close to crying, which was concerning because he rarely ever cried.

Only for Kit.

Kit scowled at him slightly. "You're with someone else, remember?"

Guilt instantly pierced through Ty's chest. "Yeah I know, I'm a terrible person," he said bitterly. He didn't want to admit to himself that he had been trying this whole time to distract himself from Kit. That he was using Anush. But that was technically true. Ty saw the opportunity to lose himself in a pretty boy with an honest smile who loved him wholeheartedly.

Ty thought he could forget but then here he was. All roads led to Kit Herondale.

Kit sighed and reached for Ty, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close. "You arent terrible. You're spiraling. And you come to me like I can save you from yourself? Please," Kit chuckled. "I can barely save myself."

"I don't need you to save me."

Kit stared at him with an expression that was hard to place. Then he smiled, but it wasnt a kind smile. It was a satisfied, knowing smirk. Kit traced his thumb under Ty's chin then back up to his lips, forcing them to part slightly.

"You think I don't know why you're here love?" He cooed in a voice that was both soothing and alluring. You think I don't know what you're after?" Kit sighed, sounding a little worn down. "If I was a better person, a stronger person. I would tell you to leave." He dipped his hands down underneath Ty's shirt.

Ty shivered at the cold feeling against his skin. He dropped his forhead down to lean against Kit's, revealing in the contact. "Lucky for you," Kit whispered against his lips, "I'm not."

Ty felt the last string of his self control snap as he kissed Kit roughly, grabbing onto his torso and pulling him closer. Kit responded to the kiss eagerly, parting his lips for Ty and laughing deliriously as their lips met again and again.

Kit was tearing off Ty's shirt as he walked him backwards, closer to the bed. As soon as he had slid it off if Ty's body, Kit tossed the shirt aside and went back to kissing him. Ty felt his knees hit the bed frame and he fell backwards onto the soft welcoming mattress, pulling Kit down with him.

Kit kissed a line down Ty's neck to his pulse point and Ty groaned, burying his fingers in Kit's curls. He was lost in a sea of pure desperation.

"Tell me to stop," Kit whispered between kisses. Ty froze for a moment. Then he understood.

Kit was giving him an out.

Ty responded by pulling Kit even closer and letting his head fall back against the pillows.

He closed his eyes and let Kit Herondale ruin him.

The morning after was the hardest. Ty pulled himself from Kit's arms and forced himself not to look back.

And that was when he finally cried.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

WHAT THE HELL FAE! WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS OMG 😭

[cedric-stories]

Swear You’ll Never Hurt Me (Cedric x Reader)

       Warnings: Angst, talk of some verbal abuse, suggestive towards the end (but in a cute way)

           Word Count: 2,180

Reader pronouns: she/her

      Pot: Cedric had just started dating you and he noticed something weird. Every time he tries to initiate affection, you seem to not want it. One day, you come over to help him make a potion and he tries to kiss you. You backed away and when he asked what’s wrong, things are more complicated than they looked.

     So, this is a more self-healing fanfic than anything. I have some emotional issues I believe are because of things my parents had told me when I was young. I just felt like if I wrote this, it could give me come closure. My ex never quite understood my problem with affection, so I never got a loving gesture like this. I guess when you never get to have love you write a fanfic about it, lol. Okay, now into the actual story and not my sob story…

                                          Swear You’ll Never Hurt Me

         Cedric had been working on potions all day. It was one of the busiest times of year. He had recently gotten an order in from the king of about 20 different potions! While most of them were easy, there was one that needed his full attention. It required him to cast a spell on someone he was in love with. He had called his girlfriend and asked you this morning if it was okay for you to help. You happily accepted.

      It was about 2pm when he heard a knock.

“It’s me!” you shouted cheerily from behind the wood.

    Cedric got up and headed for the door when Wormwood started squawking.

Cedric signed. “Wormy, I know you can talk now, what is it?”

   Wormwood fixed his feathers and looked him strait in the eyes.

“Well, it is that woman. She’s always here.”

   Cedric’s expression turned cold. “Wormwood, if you are going to complain about her today you can kindly leave.”

The raven spread his feathers and rolled his eyes. “Gladly.”

    “Hello?” you called again.

Cedric once more turned to the door. “Coming! I’m very sorry.”

   He unlocked the door and ushered you to come in.

“Thank you so much for helping, potions like this requires a…certain person to activate.”

    You smiled shyly at the last few words, not quite understanding what he meant. “No problem, I always want to help you.

    After coming in, you put your stuff down by his table. As he began putting in items, you could smell the potion start brewing. It was a lovely smell. Something like a vanilla and mocha coffee.

    Cedric watched you place your things neatly together on top each other and he wanted to help. Walking over, he put his hand on your spine.

“Oh, god!” You barely got out between breaths.

   “I-I’m sorry, I did not mean to scare you, sweetheart.”

     You turned around to face him and flattened yourself against the wall. A look of fear and embarrassment creeped onto your face.

“I-It’s fine, I promise.”

     “Are you sure you’re okay, my dear?” Cedric asked. Things in the past like this happened between the two of you. Every time he tried to even so much as put a finger on you, you would back away or appear frightened.

“Yes, you just scared me was all.”

      After watching you for a few minutes, Cedric finally decided you were okay and headed back to the cauldron. About five minutes later, it was beginning to simmer. He bent down and smelled it with a smile.

“Alright, Y/N, I think it’s ready whenever you are.”

      Once you had gotten over to the table, you looked up at Cedric and awaited instructions. He cleared his throat and began.

           “Y/N, I will need you to stand about three feet from me, okay?”

    You nodded and started walking away from him. When you were in position, he started speaking again.

           “Now, I will need you to stand still and close your eyes. It will not hurt a bit, but it does take a minute to finish. When I am done, I will tell you.” He had his teaching voice on until he looked at your big Y/C eyes and gave a small giggle. He had almost forgotten how cute you looked. Your cheeks a light shade of pink, your nose giving a slight twitch as you smelled the potion. He just couldn’t believe he had found a person like you. You were his dream girl, his everything. The day he met you he fell in love, but he never expected you to feel the same. Now, looking at you gave him a sense of pride. You were his. You wanted to be his. The very thought of it made his heart swell.

           After taking a minute, he grabbed his wand and took a deep breath.

“Ready, Sweetheart?”

           You smiled. “Ready, Love.”

           Cedric lifted his arm to his chest and closed his eyes. He said a few words and flicked his wand. A white glow appeared on the tip of the magical instrument. The light started streaming towards you and began circling around your body. The light grew brighter and you shut your eyes tighter; trying to shut out the brightness. With a small crack, and a small jump from his girlfriend, the light stream topped into small sparkles and disappeared.

           Your boyfriend dropped his wand. “Alright, Lovely, it’s over.”

     Cedric immediately walked over to the vat of boiling liquid and placed his wand over the side. He said two words and a ray of golden sparks poured into the cauldron.

           You looked into the pot and noticed how the potion’s smell turned into pure vanilla.

“Cedric?” You asked.

           “Yes, darling?”

“What is this for?”

           Cedric brushed his hair through his bangs. “It is for the king’s friend. He is dying and the only way to save him is by giving him this. It’s a potion that is quite hard to create, if I do say so myself. It requires…” He contemplated saying it. “It requires true love to form it.”

           Your eyes stinged as they began to water. “Really?”

       “Yes, that’s why I asked you to help.” Cedric looked to his side and noticed a mug sitting on the bench next to him. “Y/N, would you mind staying for coffee?”

           “I’d love to.”

     Cedric made a pot and brought a cup back for you. The two of you sat down on the couch in the living room and began talking.

     “I-it’s been such a wonderful month, Y/N. I truly do believe I have found the one I love. Well, I know I have.” Cedric wiped a few tears from his eyes and looked into yours. Oh, how your eyes gleamed. The light coming in from the window reflected off of your skin and made you glow. He was completely fixated on your beauty.

     “Y/N,” he paused.

“Yes?”

     He hesitated a moment, “May I kiss you?”

                    You looked at him stunned. He could see the wheels turning in the back of your mind as you contemplated the idea.

                       “If it is too soon, we can always- “

           “Yes.”

                        His eyes were wide. “Yes?”

           “Yes.”

                       “Aright,” he took a breath. “Let’s give this a try, shall we?”

           You nodded.

           He started to lean towards you. His hand raised up and cupped your face and his body started to shift towards yours. He knew this was a big step for you both, so he didn’t want to mess it up. He was about to lean in when he noticed the terrified look on your face.

           “Lovely, what is wrong?” He asked again kindly, putting his fingers into your hair.

                       You just stared.

           “Y/N?”

           Tears filled your eyes, and you couldn’t help it anymore. You collapsed into your arms and started sobbing.

           “I’ll mess it up! I’ll mess it all up! Everything I have worked for with you. I’ll ruin it!”

Cedric wrapped an arm around you and rubbed your back.

“Lovely, what are you talking about?”

           You looked up at him and shifted your body away.

           “They’ve always told me I’d mess it up. I know I will mess it up. You can’t date me; you’ll never be happy!”

           “Whoever told you that?”

You locked eyes with him for a minute then broke the gaze in a flash.

      “M-my parents.” You breathed. “You see, ever since I was a little girl, they’d tell me just how wonderful I was, only to tear me down in the next sentence. They told me I’d never be enough for someone. All I’d do is treat them miserably and he’d leave. I’d end up alone with my cat. Sometimes they’d treat me like I was an uncontrollable monster. All I did was hurt people. And in the beginning, I believed they were wrong, but as I got older, I started thinking maybe it was true. Maybe, I am a monster. Now, I see it is all I am. I know this is what I’ve become. I will only destroy you. I will make your life a living hell.”

      Cedric looked at you in horror. At first, he did not believe it.

“Lovely, if you do not desire to be with me, you are under no obli- “

           “Not desire? Do you know what my desires are? My desires are for you! I want you. I want you so badly. But if I let you give me love; all it’ll do is give me fulfillment. I’ll never fulfill you. All I’ll do is tear your poor soul apart. I am a being that should be hated, not loved. I do not deserve to be happy and feel a loving touch. Who am I to think I deserve love? I’m nothing.”

           Cedric had no idea what to say. You had been deeply hurt as a child. Finally, words appeared into his mind and he began to speak.

           “No, they are wrong.” He lightly grabbed your hand, and when you tried pulling away, he followed. “No one deserves to be alone. You do not deserve to be alone. You are not a monster; you are an angel. An angel that has been ripped down by people who tried to destroy you. You are worthy of love and affection, you are worthy of being cared for, and nothing would fulfill me like knowing I have fulfilled you. I want you too. I want all of you. Not just the beautiful parts, I want everything. Every ounce of you is what I crave. I love you. Do not ever let anyone tell you otherwise. Y/N, if what is holding you back is fear that I will not be happy with you, let that go. I know for a fact you are all I need.”

You looked at Cedric with a tear-stained face and felt a warmth inside you’d never felt before. For the first times ever, you felt at home with someone.

“You mean that?” You questioned.

“With my whole heart, yes.”

“I love you, Cedric.”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

           Without another word, you started leaning towards him and closed your eyes. Cedric followed suit and wrapped his arm around you. You put your hand on his leg and continued moving forward. Then, you felt soft lips touching yours. It was something so gentle, something so kind, something you had never felt before. You felt safe and secure for once in your entire life, and you loved it.

           The kiss began light, but a few seconds later, the spark turned to fire. You felt his hand firmly grip your side and your arms wrapped around his neck. You began running small fingers through his thick hair. Cedric tried sliding backwards onto the couch when you pulled away.

           “Y/N, I’m sorry if I scared you. I just thought that maybe you were somehow- “

“Are you enjoying this?” You asked him bluntly, looking him in the eyes with all your emotion while your chest pounded up and down.

           Cedric’s eyebrows shot up. “Yes, of course I am enjoying this. How could I not?”

“You promise? Be honest.”

           Cedric’s upper body shifted towards yours, his face only inches from yours.

“I’m enjoying this more than you could imagine.” He said, starting to blush.

           You were so close to just letting go and giving into your needs, but you still restrained yourself.

           Cedric could sense you were still trying to control your actions.

“Y/N? Please tell me what you are thin- “

           “Oh Cedric, swear you’ll never hurt me, like, on purpose. But also swear you’ll never stay with me unless you want me. Please, I beg you to swear it to me.” You finally let out.

           Cedric immediately kissed you. “I swear.”

Suddenly, you snapped. You weren’t afraid of yourself anymore. You let your lips crash hard against his and the two of you fell backwards. You ended up laying on top of the sorcerer, his arms sliding around your waist and pulling you close. You sat up slightly and looked down at his clothes.

           Tugging at the strings to his robe you looked down at him.

“My I?” You asked.

           His face turned bright red.

“I-I-yes.” He answered, coughing out a laugh. “I’d love that.” He broke eye contact and smiled sheepishly.

           “Promise?” You asked him once more, using your hand to guide his face back to your glance.

He gave another small laugh. “Yes, I just-I didn’t think you’d-well, I guess I just- “

      You cut him off with another kiss, only this time you tried opening your mouth slightly. Cedric caught on and the two of you started up again. You traced around his chest down to his waist and pulled on the strings to his robe. Once the tie came undone, you slipped your hands up his sides and pressed down onto his body. You hungerly kissed the man once more and then looked into his eyes. His expression was somewhere between shocked, dazed, and drunk.

“You know, Cedric…I think I could get used to this.”

He gave a silly smile. “I think I could too.”

The End

           Okay, author’s note: I really, really, really wanted to keep writing this last scene, but I thought I’d save some of that stuff for the next ones. 😉 I know it seems like it was cut short (that’s because it was, lol).