#and hey even if he were to die
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I'm having..... Will feelings. The heart wrenching yearning in "touch me"
They tell me, "Keep it simple," I tell them, "Take it slow"
I feed and water an idea, so I let it grow
I tell them, "Take it easy", they laugh and tell me, "No"
Pain pills, nice clothes
If I fall, I think I'll fly
Touch me, Midas
Make me part of your design
None to guide us
I feel fear for the very last time
They tell me that I'm special, I smile and shake my head
They tell me I'm so humble, I say, "I'm turning red"
They give so much to me, I'm losing touch, get me?
Served on a silver platter, ask for seconds, they just let me
They tell me I'm a god, I'm lost in the facade
Six feet off the ground at all times, I think I'm feeling odd
No matter what I make, they never see mistakes
Makin' so much bread, I don't care that they're just being fake
They tell me they're below me, I act like I'm above
The people blend together but I would be lost without their love
Can you heal me? Have I gained too much?
When you become untouchable, you're unable to touch
Is there a real me? Pop the champagne
It hurts me just to think, and I don't do pain
Lay still, restless
Losing sleep while I lose my mind
All thrill, no stress
All my muses left behind
World is below
So high up, I'm near-divine
Lean in, let go
I feel fear for the very last time
#did i ever say the endgame of my fic was for will to become op and rise to power in the city?#yeah.....#you die a hero or live long enough to become the villain ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#and hey even if he were to die#“i feel fear for the very last time”#urban magic yogs#umy#gc au#Spotify
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i've had these scenarios written down since volo's debut in pokemon masters and i just really wanted to scribble them down and finally release them
#pokemon#volo#pokemon volo#pokemon jacq#n harmonia#pokemon rei#trainer rei#clai's art#trying to write n's specific brand of being mean is hard to me for some reason#in the initial idea i had him outright call volo stupid but i didnt know if that was too far so i just took it out BJFBFJF#but anyway volo being a historian who had to have studied many walks of life but has still come to the conclusion that the world is hopeless#jacq being someone who's very positive and sees the best in people even if they are very much not great to him (see: raifort)#finally realizing someone he knows is like. inexcusably horrible#n's situation wasn't even that different from volo's. both saw injustice in society and sought to change it#but even n. who hated humanity for what he thought they were all responsible for. didnt want humans to Die for what they did!!#and rei. rei was a scared kid who saw the very worst of volo firsthand. rei needed friends and one of them despised him in the end#isnt it soooo funny how volo thinks he's alone yet keeps pushing away all the people who want to connect with him :) i hate pla so much :)))#as another note too. perhaps the rei thing could end in two ways#satisfying good ending where it kicks off volo's realization that hey maybe people do trust me unconditionally#or no good bad ending where volo takes this as another betrayal. rei only liked him for his facade like everyone else so why does it matter#volo almost makes me feel as ill as n does. hate this stupid guy i shouldnt have bought pla for my birthday i should have gotten. p/kmin idk
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I think rye thinks it's incredibly adorable of davrin to be worried about him after the accidental hallucination tea experiment. that stoic option 'you know, I lived a whole life before you' contains a world of 'davrin, I'm a mourn watcher with a severely misspent youth behind me. I've been stratospherically high on things you couldn't and probably wouldn't want to imagine, this is barely a tickle'. to me.
#also I think a 'haha oh no TOO close back off pls' moment even at that point. do not care for me like that it freaks me out!#i amn uncomfortable when we are about me actually (and you are smart and also tenacious enough that you'll realize that#and follow up on it. because you're an *asshole* who never lets me get away with *anything*. you'll just keep pestering me#until I have to throw my hands up in defeat and let someone perceive me and care about me. total horror show.#can't have this be happening to me right now I'm putting off having a personal and spiritual crisis until 5 minutes before I die)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#davrin#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar#their relationship. it is everything to me. the mutual 'hey punk you ever consider that there are people who love you. asshole'#'well I GUESS that *groan* my life has been infinitely enriched by your presence in it even though you're kind of a dick. there happy now'#'yeah I love and treasure you like a brother. a very annoying brother. what of it. wait you need help??? I'm here who do we kill'#and then you add lucanis' energy in there as well and you see why this is the best beloved boys squad to ever do it#also so sweet how much it's davrin opening up and showing vulnerability and uncertainty that's helped them get there the most#rye stays almost completely sober these days b/c his late teens and early twenties were uh. they got kind of rough!#so the rare times he drinks he's cautiously very very restrained about it. we simply cannot have student days shenanigans rye back.#we cannot. he barely survived being student days shenanigans rye the first time around let's not tempt fate#but in his time I think he's sampled some of that weird bottled fog stuff emmrich implies you can get some kind of high from#and then some lol#rye '*is* it drinking alone in the depths of the necropolis if the skeletons walking by give you friendly nods tho' ingellvar
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BUT IM NOT A WRITER. something strange possessed me to write my first proper fanfic in maybe a decade. be niceys to me but also grill me so i can get stronger. this one is a stupidly self indulgent bit between Soda and Emizel, a day or so after emizel was sired. CW for gore descriptions, but thats about it i think. image below is a snippet of the start. the rest of the whole dang thing will be under the cut. ive never posted fanfic ever in my life. read my tags for secret behind da scenes commentary
"Oh shit… I think hes dead…" It was another night, another patrol, another fight, and another win, for Emizel and Soda.
Under moonlight, under street light, under interwoven wires above, the two stood here in a quiet and damp alleyway. The air was drenched with the smell of a previous rain, and the puddles of said storm remain huddled in corners and pot holes.
One splashed as soda found himself stepping forwards into one. The residual adrenaline of the fight had left his body shaking, his heart still pounding, his wounds still throbbing. They had still won; or more-so, Emizel had won. A particularly nasty blow to the side had Soda reduced to the side lines for most of the fight, left to watch as his newly vampiric comrade had absolutely eviscerated the competition.
Emizel had only been turned a day ago, but it was impossible not to notice how it had changed him. He already acted so goddamn confident, so on top of the world, and this newfound power, newfound speed and strength, only built upon his insane ego.
The Fangs that they encountered here on this night stood no fucking chance. Emizel was too quick, too strong, and he easily chased off the rivals. It was only now, as the final unfortunate opponent had turned to flee, a clean clock in the jaw sent the human tumbling to the ground with a dull thump, and it did not move afterward.
Soda shifts his shoe out of the puddle, the cold seeping into his sock being one of the few things keeping his mind in his body in the moment. Is the guy breathing?
A low laugh bleeds from Emizel as he stretches his arms, licking his sharpened teeth as he stares off in the direction the remaining Fangs went. Soda knew that look on his face, the look of a tiger pondering on its next kill, he knew well that Emizel wanted to chase them.
But the guy on the ground.. It was one punch to the face, and the wicked crack sound that came from it had planted a seeding dread within Sodas chest.
As he steps forward, around the puddle, the resulting sound made Emizels attention click back over to Soda, the snap of his gaze making Soda flinch.
The two lock eyes, and Soda weakly gestures to the limp body on the floor. "The uh.. I think.. Is that guy dead?" He finally asks, having a hard time keeping contact with Emizels intensely red eyes.
Emizel turns his attention to said body, tilting his head as he goes to kick at the thing, turning it over. "Man no way hes dead, I punched him once." He mutters.
"Well, yeah, but his head almost twisted all the way around when you did.." Soda steps up to stand beside Emizel, the two boys standing with their hands in their pockets, down at this unfortunate, limp body.
"Should we hide it?" Soda asks, glancing back over at Emizel, who had.. An odd look on his face. He was clearly pondering something, but Soda could only guess whatever was going on in that brilliant head of his. He knew and trusted that Emizel was smart. If anyone could figure out what to do about this, it would be him.
But the lack of an answer had anxiety chewing at the back of Sodas rib cage, and after a second, he speaks up again, compelled to fill what he perceived as a tense silence. "Like.. I dunno, I've never uh... killed a guy..." He shrugs, prompting Emizel to let out a big sigh.
"He's not dead man, just out fuckin cold." Emizel kneels down next to the body, putting an ear up to its chest, and pondering on that for a moment. An uncertainty twists his expression, as he decides to instead place a hand on the victims throat, checking for a pulse. A moment passes, and seemingly finding nothing, he pulls back.
"Uh... Okay, so he might be dead."
Something about the confirmation from Emizel made a shiver run up Sodas spine. That, or maybe it was just the breeze agitating the cold water in his shoe.
"Huh… Damn.." Was all that Soda could really get to leave his mouth. Which was hardly a splash compared to the torrent that was slowly churning in his head. They just killed a guy. Or, Emizel just killed a guy. And it was so easy. They had to hide the body now, right? That was the usual progression here? Getting caught for murder was way more extreme than getting caught for breaking mailboxes with soda cans. It was so, so disturbingly easy. It really was just one punch. It's not like the Fangs are weak by any means, so just one punch? And this guy is dead? Forever?
Or, perhaps by human means, their rivals were fairly tough. But Emizel was on a whole other level. No mortal could stand up to him now...
"Hey, are you okay?"
The question had pulled Soda back from his head, his gaze flicking back over to Emizel, who was looking up at him with those eerie, piercing red eyes. Soda felt another shiver.
"Uh, ieah man, I'm all good." Soda nods, swallowing down whatever anxiety was bubbling up in his throat.
But Emizel didn't seem satisfied by his answer, standing back up and staring down his human comrade. Soda couldn't meet his eyes, his gaze instead traveling downward, and pausing on Emizels red, cut-up shirt. There was something off about the color, the way it seemed darker in some spots, brighter in others.. Wait, wasn't Emizel wearing a white shirt before all this?
The vampire boy seems to pick up on Sodas expression, following his eyes down to his shirt. "Oh, yeah! While you were on the floor, the knife guy got me a little" He says, a stupidly simple smile on his face. Soda was about to let out a laugh at how unbothered his friend seemed by it, but it gets caught in his throat when Emizel goes to pull his shirt up.
The sound of the bloodied fabric peeling away from skin made Sodas own skin crawl, but that wasn't nearly as bad as the sight of the intense gash running from his collar bone, down to his stomach.
"Oh, fuck dude!" Soda gasps, but Emizel laughs it off. Even despite knowing Emizel well, Soda was still surprised by just how much Emizel could shrug off. "Shit, doesn't that hurt, dude?"
"Oh yeah this fucking hurts!" he says with a laugh, his smile big and toothy and proud as he presents this egregious wound. Swollen and angry, pulsing with a slow heartbeat, and still oozing with thick, dark blood.
The sight of the split flesh, and the glints of bone beneath the dark, dark red all tugged at Sodas gag reflex, and yet he couldn't pull his eyes away. So Emizel's just been walking and talking so normally this whole time with his chest just cleaved wide open? Soda felt just as impressed as he felt horrified.
It wasn't until Emizel reaches down to poke at the abhorrent wound that Soda snaps out of it. Watching his friend press his fingers into the bloodied flesh, and slowly pulling it apart, allowing more ichor to seep from the gash, it was too much to watch at this point.
Soda reaches up to put a hand on Emizels wrist, the vampire boy stopping, and looking up at his friend.
Soda found himself freezing again when he locks eyes with Emizel. He was going to say something now, right? "U-uhm.." Is all he really chokes out, giving Emizels wrist a gentle tug. "D-do you. Uh. I suppose a hospital Isn't a place you can go anymore..?"
Emizel just smirks at that, letting Soda pull his hand away from the wound. "Oh, yeah no, but it's fine. I mean, I don't think it's gonna kill me" He shrugs. It was so, so impressive just how unphased Emizel was by all this. Fuck he's actually so cool.
"Well yeah man but it's like, still a bleeding hole. Like you're soaked in blood dude, I'm pretty sure that even a vampire needs that stuff on like, the inside." Soda rubs the back of his head, still unnerved by the sight of it all. "Vampires have like, super healing, don't they?"
"Oh yeah like, regeneration powers. I know I heal faster sometimes but I dunno how to just, activate it on command.." Emizel hums, his eyes narrowing down at his own injury, as if trying to will it into mending. Soda looks away, unable to watch that vile gash ooze any longer.
"I dunno man, how do they do it in like, video games?" Soda tosses the question out, trying to click together some sort of solution in his own head.
"Uhhh.. Huh, video games.." Emizel repeats to himself, chewing on the thought while idly poking at the laceration; until an idea audibly flickers to life in his head. "Oh, I just gotta refill my blood meter. Or whatever."
"Oooh yeah, blood meter!" Soda perks up, "Of course, see this is why you're the brains, man" Soda smiles, glancing back over to his cool friend, but immediately needing to look away again when the sight of that egregious gash tugs bile back into his throat.
While Soda averts his eyes, Emizels eyes wander back over to the body, and that classic 'Emizel has a bad idea' smile creeps across his face.
"Well, if this guys dead, I'm sure he's not gonna need all that blood.." He grins, kneeling down next to the body again.
The word 'wait' had hardly gotten the chance to crawl from Sodas mouth, before Emizel lifts up the arm of the unfortunate body, pulling the sleeve back, and immediately sinking his teeth into the exposed wrist.
The sound and the sight of blood gushing around Emizels teeth made Soda cringe, his hand impulsively coming up to aide his own wrist. An empathetic phantom pain made his wrist ache, his imagination simulating the feeling of shark teeth cutting into skin, sinking deep into the flesh, and clacking against bone. That was a lot of blood, that was streaming down the arm of this fodder.
A low growl bleeds from Emizel as he adjusts his teeth, cutting into more flesh, opening the wound further, and allowing a pulsing torrent of red to stream down his chin, onto his coat. It was an annoying thing, to clean blood out of clothing. Most of the Demons deemed it easier to just let the stains remain. But the night that Emizels throat was torn open, and liters upon liters were granted freedom from his human form, the unbelievable mess had practically changed half the color of Emizels iconic coat.
That was the first time Soda had ever seen that much blood from one person. And well. This would probably be the second.
The sight was unnerving, but it was impossible to look away. The alley was quiet, save for the distant bustle of a distant city, which made the noisy squish and squelch of teeth gnawing on flesh all the more apparent and nauseating.
Emizel had become a monster for sure, and watching it feed on something was… thrilling, in a way. It reminded Soda of feeding a pet spider, or lizard. A mouse for a snake.
It's a heavy thing to witness, the end of a human life. The fear of death is a primal thing, and Soda was no different from any other living thing. He figured everyone else feared death just as much as he does. Well, maybe except for Emizel, of course.
It made sense. Emizel was such a cocky and noisy kind of guy, but hes always had the power to back it up. Even when he lost, or seemed at his lowest, Soda still saw this sort of fire in him, one that Soda admired.
Of course Emizel would be the one to become something like a vampire. Something that Soda had always figured was just a fantasy creature thing. He wondered; if vampires were real, what else was real? Werewolves? Zombies? Unicorns? Are there real demons? Like from hell? Is hell real? Is he going to hell?
The sudden ttteeeeaaaaarrrr of flesh rips soda from his wandering thoughts. Emizel was tugging his head away from the arm of his kill, his teeth clamped down into the chewed meat, and pulling it apart. Soda had seldom seen so much of the inside of a human arm, and the sight of spilling threads and squirming veins was hardly something he ever wanted to stomach again.
"Oh fuck, dude, hey-" Soda steps forward, raising a hand, but the way Emizel snaps his head back over to him, twisting to an unnatural degree, Soda cant help jolting back.
Reddened teeth glint menacingly in the low light, a threatening growl thundering from its clenched, dripping jaws. Emizels eyes were focused, yet wild, glowing with whatever light they could reflect.
Sodas eyes were wide, and his body was frozen in the thick, electric tension within the air. It was like staring down an angry dog.. Suddenly a light bulb in his head flickers to life. It was kind of like an angry dog, right? One hunched over a meal it didn't want to give up. Memories of old encounters and unfortunate dog bites resurface in Sodas head, and with that experience, and with those lessons learned, he gathers the courage to react.
He shuts his eyes, keeping them closed for a few seconds, as he slowly pulls back his arm, and slowly steps back. It was an eye contact thing, wasn't it? Eye contact makes dogs angry, right? That was how you dealt with an angry dog? As he pulls back, and takes in a breath for composure, he finally dares to peek at the angry vampire before him again.
Its snarling had died down, but its eyes were still trained intently on Soda. After a tense, and agonizingly, slow pause... It blinks back, lowering its head back down to its meal, but keeping its anxious stare on this potential threat.
A relieved sigh falls from soda as the tension finally melts. He didnt realize he was holding in so much of his breath. "O-okay, man.. It's yours, you uh.. Earned it.." Soda mutters, stepping back further, until he was standing in a sufficiently dry enough space to sit down in. Now that he wasn't standing, he was finally taking into mind just how much his hands were shaking.
It's odd. Soda couldn't really describe this feeling thrumming in his chest as something like fear.. Nausea? For sure. Disturbed and rattled? Oh absolutely. This was certainly a sight he would have a hard time scrubbing from his eyelids when he sleeps tonight. But he wasn't scared. The memory of the night that Emizel was sired still coated the inside of his mind like an unwashable film. Even in that moment, when the unnatural teeth from the unnatural maw of an unnatural thing hovered over his throat, he couldn't say with confidence that he was scared.
Emizel really is his best friend in the world. And he knows with his whole heart that Emizel feels the same. He knew and trusted that his best friend would never hurt him. Not too badly at least. He loves Emizel, and would give anything to support him.
Like a mouse to a snake.
This really is an incredible power that his comrade had come across, and Soda especially felt a sort of pride in his friend. He felt it was worth it to help him feed it.
The bile in his throat had made its point, and Soda agreed, that watching someone die, and get torn apart and drained might be too much for him. Despite how much he hated the Fangs, the end of any human life seemed like such a jarring thing. To have such an intense fear finally get confronted. Would he go to hell?
Maybe he couldn't just feed people to his friend. So an alternative could be donated blood, right? Soda wouldn't mind giving up something like blood. His body makes it for free, after all. Maybe some other Demons would agree to give up some blood too. But they shouldn't have to take on such a burden. Soda wouldn't mind being the only one. The only one. The only one.
His hand comes up to rub at his neck, as his imagination conjures up what it might feel like to have teeth sink into his flesh. He's been stabbed before, is that sort of what it would feel like? Would he have to get stitches? He didn't really want to get stitches, so maybe there could be a more effective way to get the blood out of him. And there was so much vital stuff in his neck too. There's' a vein that's safe to cut into somewhere, right? He would have to look that up later.
A STARTLING RINGING;
Splits the moment,
Prompting both Soda and Emizel to jolt in shock,
As the phone in Emizels pocket rings away.
Acting as if nothing abnormal had taken place, Emizel pulls out his phone, and answers it.
"Heyy, Johnny! Yeah we chased em off, I don't think those bastards will be infesting this street again anytime soon. Yeah, ieah we'll be heading back soon. Oh fuck yeah dude, save us some!"
Emizel covers the speaker of his Nokia, turning back to Soda with a big smile on his violently bloodied face. "They got some pizza waiting for us back home, dude!" he whispers out to him.
Soda does his best to crack a smile, and to suppress the look of unease that probably stained his face, as he stares at the literal murder scene that's been splattered about in front of him.
"Oh, yeah, hell yeah man.." He swallows down the bile again. "What kind of uh.. Soda did they get?"
Emizel ponders that, before turning back to the phone to ask Sodas question.
"Sprite and a big pack of that one strawberry mountain dew" Emizel tosses the answer back over to Soda, who gives a nod, and thumbs up.
Mountain dew is so neat, Soda really liked all the wacky flavors those guys come up with. The thought of going home and opening a can of soda was certainly a comfort. After witnessing all this blood and gore and viscera, Soda absolutely needed to get back home and get a nice cold glass of something bright red .
As Sodas mind wanders off to soda, Emizel wraps up the conversation on the phone, before hanging up, and standing up.
The movement had pulled Sodas mind back into the moment, enough for him to timidly voice a concern he's had since the start of this debacle.
"Uh, hey, so.. The body, should we… Uh.." He gestures vaguely to it, and Emizel grants it a nonchalant glance.
"Eh, I can toss it into a dumpster or something, I dunno. I'm sure its fine. I'll handle it."
The vampire boy goes to pick up the corpse, the wound in its mangled arm no longer even dripping with blood, the flesh pale from the absolute absence of red in its veins.
"Go ahead and meet me by that one mailbox, the one with the bullet hole in it." Emizel casually instructs, tossing the drained body over his shoulder. "I'll catch up."
"Uh, yeah, okay.." Soda musters up a nod, and the strength to rise back up to his feet, wincing as that bruise on his side makes itself loudly known again. He still felt anxious, but even despite it all, he knew he could trust Emizel to take care of things. He always does. "Just stay safe man, I'll see you there." Soda assures with a smile, and Emizel matches it, tossing him a wink. And then suddenly- -He's gone! If Soda had blinked he would've missed it, but he was fortunate enough to just barely catch the glimpse of Emizel darting off at an inhuman speed, probably looking for a place to dump the body. Right, he would take care of it. Emizel always makes sure his crew is taken care of. Well... Guess all that's left for Soda is for him to walk back to that meeting spot. He looks around the alley for a moment, taking in the sight of that enormous pool of blood in the middle of the concrete. Or whatever the floor of this alley is made from. He ponders on the present moment a little longer than he meant to, the shock of it all leaving him aimless for just a few, soothing moments of just, decompression. The night is quiet, vast, and cold, but the stresses of just the past 5 hours had left his body radiating with fiery aches and pains, so the chill of the occasional clawing breeze was welcomed. Except for when said breeze agitated the cold water still soaked into his sock. He should step in another puddle on his way back to even it out. The smell of rain still rested heavy in the air, heralding another storm on the horizon. There was that, and then, well, there was also the blood. The stench of it felt far too intense to just ignore it, the metallic miasma making itself maliciously unmistakable. Maybe the impending storm will wash this mess away... He looked forward to putting this unfortunate night behind him. With one last rattled, but deep breath, he stuffs his hands in his pockets, and turns away, strolling back over to the mailbox that Emizel had described.
He couldn't wait to get home and drink some soda with his friends.
#NO TAGS ON THIS ONE BC WELL. IM SHY. IM TAKING A BIG LEAP JUST BY ALLOWING U TO REBLOG THIS. IF IT BREAKS CONTAINMENT THATS UR FAULT.#i unfortunately suffer from the disease of 'i hate everything i write the day after i write it' BUT IM GETTING TREATED#I WILL NOT BE HAUNTED BY THIS WEAKNESS FOREVER. AND HEY LOOK THIS IS THE FIRST ACTUAL FIC BIT IVE EVER FINISHED..#ITS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!! AND BY JOBE I WILL BE PROUD EVEN IF I HATE IT.#i dont always need to be the one who likes my art bc i know Someone out there will always enjoy it.#and to that someone i say: omg thankyou i LOOOOVEE YOUUUUUU!!!!!#JUST DELETED A WHOLE RAMBLE I JUST HAD ABT NERVOUS DISCLAIMERS FOR MY ART BUT I DONT NEED EM!!#GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT GET CONFIDENT. ANYWAY. so emizel and soda huh#THEYRE SO CUTE TOGEEHTERRRR TEEHEHEHEHEEEE they are the homies that kiss eachother goodnight like CMON#but uhh so hey your bestest friend in da world just got turned into a freaky creature thing that eats ppl#ieah yknowthe guy that u care about alot that u had to watch get bled out by another freaky creature thing in an alleyway#yeaaah and you were super hurt and weak and stupid and u couldnt do jack nor shit to help him#what was i talking about again. RIGHT so hes even cooler now bc he cant die n hes super strong n his arms can be knives. sometimes.#but also he can eat people now. and sometimes he cant stop himself from eating people. and thats kinda scary. but in a cool way.#but also in a disturbing way. but also in an interesting way?but also in a freaky way.the feelings ARE MIXED!!!ATLEAST I THINK THEY WOULD B#okay again i havnt listened to the suckening ina bit. so its been a minute since i absorbed their personalities. i could be misreading or#misremembering or misconstruing or mischaracterizing or WHATEVER. i think the confusion carries its intended effect#LOSING MY TRAIN O THOUGHT. anyway i love soda n emizel i hope they get locked in a saw trap together or somethign. for enrichment.#TALOS GRANT ME THE STRENGHT TO POST MY CREATIONS ON LINE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGHHH!!!!!!!
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loving the vibe of people who havent watched riverdale and havent watched the finale posting to complain about how they had a very normative ending because it reinforced the idea that characters have to be in relationships to be interesting. like my man fuck 86 year old single mother by choice and feminist magazine editor with no regrets about never getting married whose dying wish was to see all her old friends again betty's entire life just because she was in a quad for a year 67 years ago i guess. it's not enough that narrator jughead erased her whole shit now people on the internet who dont even care about betty my friend betty are doing it too. and the core four arent even in set relationships in the big pop's in the sky because they're juniors again. but you dont get the big pop's in the sky you don't care about the big pop's in the sky. i do
#like tbh i think it's the silliest complaint. bc cheryl+toni and human kevin+clay and archie+a girl (allegedly+off screen) end up together#while betty jughead veronica (probably married to fame though) and reggie end up single and midge is a teenage widow (rip fangs)#and the only one who is stated to not be happy with being single is JUGHEAD because he is A MISERABLE SHELL OF A MAN as he has ALWAYS BEEN#so it's like. what are you ON about stop talking about the riverdale episode made up in your head. they DIE of OLD AGE and go to POP'S#but you wouldnt even understand the implications of what dying and going to pop's to be 17 forever means#and it's funny bc the show seems to say hey it doesnt even matter the ships were not central to the story#they could be all together or they could not or you could come up with whatever combinations you want#because in the end. they go back. to their toy box. it was always about the toy box#there's no 'endgame' that matters because the game will never end the game is forever. at the big pop's in the sky#riverdale#thing
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Something that really bothers me about the rose coloured glasses vis a vis tellius and fe fans (ESPECIALLY from 3h fans who learned about tellius later) is that many like soren purely because of his main ship (i mean i like ikesoren too but come the fuck on) and jokingly characterise soren as a stereotypical nasty mean limp wristed sarcastic gay man instead of a deeply flawed branded angry at the world and definitely trauma bonded to ike, but micaiah is still absolutely getting raked over the coals over the blood pact and not being ike’s fangirl
Well,
Jokes often involve flanderisation, so Soren being flanderised to oblivion when people joke about him isn't something I really care about, but maybe that's because I'm not really fond of Soren to begin with lol
What annoys me more is when some people try to rationalise Soren's anger and backstory by either pointing at Almedha or Deghinsea being responsible for everything, and I'm like, what.the.fuck?
Almedha's just, idk, I won't call it sexism, but damn - that woman loves her son who is the only reason why she hasn't completely lost her mind over 1/losing her powers 2/being casted away like trash by her "BF" 3/being rejected by her dad 4/thinking her brother was tortured and abused to death because of her actions 5/being separated from her beloved child.
Deghinsea being "uwu bad bcs he's the reason why brandeds are rejected by both beorcs and laguz" is another take I really am not fond of, and iirc I wrote a post earlier this year about it? But to some people who buy the "Crusts BaD" as the reason why Fodlan sucks, I guess they need to have someone to name and pill all of the world's nonsense rather than, well, in Tellius' case, realise that the worldbulding and the lore really sucks, to the point where the duology touted as the most "against racism" of the franchise, is pretty much way more racist than anything Tru Piss can throw us (yes, because in Tru Piss we have characters rejecting coexistence, in Tellius, it's the world mechanics - whenever a Beorc and a Laguz coexist too much, the Laguz dies...).
As for Miccy,
Just like, imo, Soren gains some "new" attention and "uwu excuses for why he's being a snarky jerk at times", Miccy used to be bashed when FE10 was released (with all the Mary Sue accusation being thrown around!) because she was written to be a sort of foil/antagonist to Ike, and when the party reunited, she was demoted to a "soul-jar" role, let it be regarding the greater plot, or, even, her own backstory!
TBH, for people who didn't play FE10, if Ike is the bestest thing since melted cheese, Miccy, who opposes him, must be BaD and so you can pile everything you don't like on her, hoping to see it stick.
Or even worse, I've seen posts here and there comparing Miccy to Supreme Leader and how misunderstood uwu she is, which is the worst insult poor Miccy ever received since FE10 came out rofl
#2goldensnitches#do you want to kill me friend lol#once upon a time discussions about soren and miccy were very animated lol#anyways i still don't like how some part of the fandom tries to uwu him#he is a character with flaws that sure are never called out in the game and by the main character but#they exist#and to uwu them away is imo a disservice and not a good reading on him#'but his backstory sad uwus' Sephiran also has a crapton of sad uwus for his backstory#and yet the game chews him out about his plans to destroy the world because hey fuck off#it's not fair to condemn the world and everyone who lives in it for your suffering#It's sort of hilarious because sometimes I wonder if Miccy wasn't also written as a Soren foil#Miccy is the one who doesn't like when Beorc call Laguz names#she lives in racist land and knows she has to hide else she'll die too#but she still came to care about the people who live here#she gets to talk to Vika who feels weirded out by her being a branded and yet they agree to continue talking/being friends despite it#Miccy never insults Rafiel calling him a half beast#Soren follows Ike and his lead but Miccy has to take the lead despite wanting to follow Pelleas at first#tfw we know more about Soren's backstory even after being kicked away from Daein than Miccy's lol#granted I loved what FE10 with Almedha when you see that some of his worst traits/flaws are actually shared by his mom lol#tl;dr : a Soren raised by his mom would have been even more of a jerk than the one we got#i have a lot of feelings about how Miccy was treated in FE10 which in turn sort of explains the vitriol she received from the fandom#but that's for another post lol else it'll be too long#basically FE10 is more Ike v.2 than a game where Miccy is the Lord
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heol
#unrelated its ltr not even what i linked but chasing time - azealia.. Dontttt omg ts is so facking good who made that beat!!!!!!!!!!#ANW. if breakaway is minhui then this is yijun. mayb the single ver more than true romance ver actually.. it js sounds more raw#i rly wanna talk abt why he hates jaehee#bc i’ve yapped abt minhui and talked abt DY/JY sort-of parallels in replies somewhere i found it the other day#and ik the ‘he doesn’t fit’ is what's been written (in pieces + that yt rundown i think) but likee it goes deeper than that#im gnna struggle to put it into words properly but im talking to myself so i can not make sense as much as i want thanks#ok. so he goes on and on abt how jaehee ruined BS bec he ‘didn’t fit’ into the four that they were without him but. he’s lowk projecting#he joined JG in 2016 - jiyeol mai hyeonmin and KOHEN were all there before him. jy’s in ‘08 mi + kh in 2010 + hm 2011#they chucked their whole childhoods away for jg - and in reward they were meant to be jg’s first boygroup#they ltr would’ve debuted in 2013 if it wasn’t for hyojoo being like hey! this is kinda weird lol! a 17 yo two 15 yos + a 13 yo is weird!#yj was late as HELLLL 2the party. he wouldve been left as a trainee while JY MI KH HM debuted as 9ANTHER if it wasnt 4 The Kohen Mai Thing#aka they started messing around in like 2014 while jy pretended he wasnt abt to crash out and hm had to listen to jy trying not2 crash out#then it got real bad like august 2016 and all of a sudden they HATEDD eo they couldnt even b in the same room#(aka. kh wanted him mi wanted jy and said Lollll i hate u die)#all in all: kh kicked off debut team. spot opens up for yijun right as he enters the company. he’s not cut out for ts at all#he was lonely back home and now he’s lonely here and now apparently he’s in a debut team with 3 guys who know eo and he wants to die#hyeonmin like smiles at him like ONCE during practice and he latches on fastttt this leech 😭😭😭 tries to worm his way in via hm#spoiler! it only half works theres sand under his skin he hates it all he’s not meant for them he needs a gun#it gets better over the years and jy + mi sorting their shit out & cutting off kh completely makes yj feel wayy more secure#and then they debut even if it is after yoonhae’s literal death. and then jaehee comes in like Hiii i like to act and colour ^_^#HE WNATS TO DIEE ITS HIM ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!!!! cant even bear to look at him#like the walls are UP he’s not letting himself become kohen. and when jh tries to get close to min - ltr exactly like he did.......#ITS NEVER BEEN MORE BONSOVERRRR#so there. he’s mean and hates him and wants him dead for that. Yayyyy#kh has def said some nasttyyyyy shit to yj too ijbol like mind you he didnt leave jg until jy did! THIS YEAR!#the song. is abt himself. him to him in the mirror. to kohen. to jaehee. he’s mad at shit that’s never happened and he’s never gonna stop#the ‘why did you fall for me’ though.. that’s him to min like#he feels like he’s conned him into it - bec the first couple months he only rly was around him to try and get into the inner circle#and then he fell in Lol. Gay#‘you’re not there / you’re just an echo’ is def towards hm after 2020 when him and mai left too ouhhhhh throws up
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will die on the hill that Hermes is the fucking best
like in every media he's in he's just the best
pjo , epic , etc
he's just awesome
#and I will die on this hill#0 clue how he actually is in Greek mythology but in the media I've seen he's great af#even if he's barely mentioned - when he is he's being awesome#“Oh hey hero that has an extremely good chance of dying- let me give you smth to give you a much better chance of not dying”#one of the best godly parents in pjo - sure he was absent (all gods were) but he really tried#could talk for way too long defending Hermes if you cannot tell#love this guy#plus he's LMM which is an added plus :3 /silly#val's little hellhole
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ok so while my ds is getting sand poured into it at alarming rates I'm thinking about how jrpgs in specific have a really weird desync with How Important Death Is. like some address it better than others but it very frequently happens where if you take a step back youll go "am I wild or is everybody just like, Really down with murder in this game". and consequences for said murder, especially in a characterization sense but even just actual physical consequences, don't really happen? unless it's a vehicle for conflict but like. when it is a vehicle for conflict it feels weird because why are These Guys actually taking the fact we killed somebody in broad daylight seriously and coming after us for it while all the other npcs and even the main party took it like it was another saturday evening
see I Think where the issue lies is in the fact that everything is in its own little world when you're in a battle? like. when you fight an enemy and you get leather out of it it's seen as something the enemy Drops and not. their hide. when you defeat a character in a battle it does just feel like you Defeated them. unless there's dialogue afterwards that says otherwise you don't even mentally assume you killed em you just wounded them enough to make them flee or dissolve or whatever. and it's Weird to just. have that assumption there because for a lot of games it really isn't clear if you're killing them or defeating them !!
that last point is extra important when you have the specific brand of Skittish Hero / Noble Hero Who Doesn't Kill People / Rational Hero In Way Over Their Head or whatever where you really don't think they Would kill a guy just to get them out of the way. in that case it's REALLY weird because it's hardly brought up. even if it Is brought up that that guy Sure Did Die the mc doesn't tend to actually have a reaction ??? and I don't know why this is ???? like Any written reaction would be more interesting than nothing even if the guy doesn't have a full on crisis about taking another life having them go "oh shit, The Consequences" would be nice. really anything except (oh cool we can advance the plot now).
I will also mention that Some deaths do matter plot wise but very frequently what makes them matter is how much of it is linked to an in game battle I think. if your mc just finishes a fight and comes back to the overworld and the guy's Disappeared or Dissolved or whatever it means they don't matter. if the guy's still around after the fight it means it's more significant, especially if they're still alive but wounded or Really Shaken Up. because this clears up the indistinguishable line between if a battle is lethal or not and if a character decides to deal a finishing blow now it's Way more telling of their character. even though this is basically the same thing that happened in the (killed In A Battle) scenario. just with more dialogue. I will also mention that the person who deals the finishing blow is Rarely Ever that good hearted protagonist and often they'll even go :0 at somebody else committing a murder despite them instigating and helping murder quite a few people. just. In Battle. so it's less bad. I guess.
this is leaving out the fact that in party deaths are often a Major Major Blow because like. ok that's fair. that's A Guy You Knew that's understandable. anyway I don't really know where I'm going with this I just think it's interesting how in these types of games death can swap from not mattering at all to mattering a Lot and if u don't think about it too hard u don't even question it. I'll probably be putting some examples in the tags idk
#i will note that in this specific instance most of my party Is actually super down with murder like vocally#so its less weird but it Is weird that the mc does. Not Seem The Type.#i mean not to say he should have tried to spare everybody i think its kinda neat that he doesnt but#if the fact that he doesnt was brought up at all thatd be interesting. have him acknowledge he killed a dude#but no hes just kind of standing there like (ok what next) no leaning one way or another#these would all be interesting reactions if they were actually Brought Up in dialogue but no its just. oversight#anyway this is about sand but ive also felt this about live a live and even bits of twewy#like specifically in lal the fact that the edo chapter Exists and killing people is just Battling Them made me look at Every Other Chapter#thru a lens of (okay am. am i killing these dudes.) and the answer is I DUNNO#like the guy exploded into a cloud of mist theres no way hes Not dead but its STRANGE#this felt most noticeable in the imperial china and present day chapters because they had mcs who decidedly did not feel down with murder#specifically present day because masaru is fighting this guy for the crime of killing a guys. and woa. he killed a guys. with his Hands#i think theres only a handful of deaths in lal that actually mean anything and you can tell which they are because they dont explode#like in You Know The Part with The Character I Cant Say that guys i think the only time defeating an enemy Leaves A Corpse#ok actually thats a lie the Other Guy I Cant Say in The Chapter Before That also died like that and that was equally important#s also worth mentioning that said first guy can ? also die without leaving a corpse? just turn to ash??#depending on where u go with him. which is weird right. thats weird right.#maybe that just means (hey youre not supposed to feel bad about him dying this tiiiime)#anyway its 5 am ill post this in the morning#veespeaks
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entering to panthers pulse does go pretty hard luosty yeah
Luosty Cup Day | 8.5.24 (x)
#eetu luostarinen#florida panthers#so at least i dont have to tag this we are the champions#silver linings in everything i suppose#you know what should be studied? cats fans relationship to panthers pulse#hey remember in the offseason when they revealed we no longer we're gonna have solo goal songs we were mourning#and then they revealed it was this fucking song and there was so much outcry#even i remember the way my face cringed hearing it for the first time#attending 2 games multiple watch parties and a stanley cup win later i think i would die without her#you can't take panthers pulse away from me i love her shes dear to me I WOULD DIE WITHOUT HER#my opinion on the song has changed a lot the more positive memories are associated with jt#but really i credit that drunk guy next to me in the nosebleeds that took a swan dive in the row ahead of us#during a lundy goal at the famed yotes game where i was busy singing along to the song like a maniac because it was the 5th goal we scored#while my mother very worridely tapped my shoulder to go check on the guy (it was her first hockey game) and i went oh a guy fell? really?#when? and she was like JUST NOW DID YOU NOT SEE HIM??? and i went oh why would i pay attention to the guy next to me WE'RE 5-0???#(dw he was fine he just tipped over and was immediately back up and started hollering for the goal like we all were except my mother XD)#(one of the good things to come of this is my abuela agreed with me she went we're here to watch hockey so we're going to watch hockey)#(my poor mother outnumbered by sports fanatics; my abuela who named all my uncles after boca junior players she liked XD)#(also her first game and she got the full hockey experience and loved it but she absolutely backed me up on everything love her so muchhh)
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The most recent session of the Starfinder campaign I've been in broke me so bad I had to go horizontal for a bit and then get the very last scene drawn <3 Tai really isn't allowed to keep anything good in his life.
After so many years they reunited at last in the worst way possible- and all this time neither of them have been able to let the other go in some fucked up co-dependency.
This arc was gonna be fun, they said. It's a Battle of The Bands event at Songbird Station for charity, they said. The team's Captain didn't sign up for his finally rebuilding confidence/mental health to shatter at Ikoma coming back into his life. Especially because it's unknown how much longer that Ikoma will even be alive for or if he'll even stay the rest of that time.
#Kat's Art#Kat's TTRPG PCs#Tai Kemi#It was SO nice to have an in person session again#especially one that right at the end had two characters' backstories come to the forefront#which included the long-coming yelling match between these two because Tai let loose all the fear and hurt he's bottled up#And his resolve was challenged so badly in the face of realizing how much his meddling's hurt Ikoma's efforts to keep him alive#All because Tai wanted to chase after the image of Ikoma that he's built up in his head since they were young#and be the heroic type#because he's so tired of being a coward#and so tired of his cowardice allowing others to be hurt or even die when there's something he can do about it#How could he have ever guessed that the BBEG would use Ikoma as a conduit?#The sentient manifestation of the concept of Absence?#It's so out of his scope of comprehension#they're so perfect yet so horrible for each other#both the other's kryptonite but they keep getting drawn back together#because each other's all they've ever known#Hey my lovely absolutely insane dm if you read this far into my tags I love you and this angst is such a good flavor#Travelers Of The Stars Campaign#Ikoma Lightbringer
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What ive learned about the yakuza community is that you guys are way too hung up over that scene in y4 where he pinned haruka to the ground then started panting really heavily , that didnt happen for me , that scene wasnt real to me i forgot about it.
#Yakuza loveblog#it literally didnt happen for me like the game could have been perfect without it so i took it out#like how could you not like saejima he... he would be the perfect man if not for that scene#but it WOULD be funny to make haruka have beef with both majima (kidnapped her) and saejima (lowkey assaulted her)#saejima wouldnt do that .. he loves kids ...#i adore saejima i think hes super cool and extremely hardcore. more hardcore than kiryu even and kiryu is extremely hardcore#saejima was the first to almost die in the snow but unlike kiryu he didnt even get frostbite#well he did a bit but it wasnt that bad ... kiryus fingers were one hard press from having the flesh slough right off#anyway HOW CAN ANYONE NOT LIKE SAEJIMA HES SO COOOOOOL#Hes so charismatic and you can tell the depths of his empathy are unfathomable ... he looks at someone with sorrow and you know his heart#is breaking. he always gets so serious and sombre when hes trying to convince someone not to go down a dark path#my stomach HURTS. see saejima could have given me medicine because he is so kind#you have got to forgive him for pinning haruka to the ground with his knee between her legs like you need to forgive him#that was a slipup he was never planning on doing anything and he was very sorry for it ... i swear to you he just froze up he wasnt planning#on touching her or anything ... you know whos truly to blame ? kiryu. for standing there once again like a stone starue and letting it happe#hey ‘suzuki’ (lol thats a good one i might steal it later) i know youre an escaped convict because of the animalistic look in yout eye when#you pinned my twelve year old daughter to the ground and slobbered on her. and not the other telltale signs like you wearing a prisoners#outfit when you washed up on shore (lol) no there were no other clues. that was what tipped me off#hated kiryu in y4 he is useless. i will never forgive him. see saejima was panicking because haruka was going to call an ambulance. kiryu#had a cool head and he still decided to do some stupid shit. too bad i badly want men who make bad decisions and want to fuck kiryu so much
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me when there's still a "mike wheeler is good and strong and brave, actually" moment in my mike stays in hawkins fic but it comes from dustin
#wip: butterflies and bullshit#dustin is the Mike Translator okay#he translated mike's feelings for him when they were 12 so he'd be even better now#they work together to make their ideas understandable to other people#dustin compliments mike's good ideas and seeks out his advice#dustin went all the way to the wheelers when dart turned out to be dangerous because he'd trust mike to know how to deal with it#even though he must have known that mike would've been insufferable about being right had he found him#like they're so. they're SO#they're so SWEET and SUPPORTIVE and i can't DEAL WITH IT#everyone trying to get on the invalidate mike train and dustin being like 'hey what the fuck' and defending him#and backing up his plan and his autonomy and his judgement#i am just. i am saying words. but i have so many#they're amazing#''well i call bull on your logic because you're my best friend too''#you all moved on but i'm still here#and then mike tried to literally die for dustin#i am just saying WORDS-#bnb posting
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Baby shoto, fresh from the womb: 👁-👁
Touya: *already on fire* you little shit. I’ll see you in hell bitch
#people always make him so caring and concerned in fics#that man truly does not care one bit about his siblings or his mother#he has 2 goals in life and those are to kill endevour and then die#didn’t even know what his quirk was#simply saw the hair and decided he needed to go#kinda funny of him I’m ngl#one glance and decided the vibes were off#Rei: hey touya meet ur new baby brother :)))#touya: so you’ve chosen death#anyways I’ve been waiting 2 years for the reveal to be animated#and we are getting SO close#I dropped MHA forever ago but I WILL be seated for my boy#yeah!! ruin that bitches life!! fuck him up dabi!!#mha#bnha#mha spoilers#bnha spoilers#dabi#dabi mha#dabi bnha#touya todoroki
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it is not at all fair or understandable considering we've easily seen grant more than all the other kiddads combined but if i dont see him at least once within the next three episodes im going to start sawing the legs off my chairs
#talking tag#THEY WERE IN HELL FOR SO LONG. WHAT IS GRANT DOING. WHERE IS HE. I NEED HIM AND LINCOLN TO TALKJ NOW OR ILL DIE#lincoln probably cant even really talk to his dad because whats he going to do? ask for advice? 'hey dad howdo i feel better'#'ohwlel me personally i like artillery weapons myself they make me feelbethehre'#ive seen people genuinely say 'i dont understand why linc is so mad at his dad' i need linc to PUNCH that man#BEING THE WORLDS NUMBER ONE GRANT LIKER AND THE WORLDS NUMBER ONE LINC LIKER AT THE SAME TIME? FEELINGS YOU CANNOT IMAGINE
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current mood:
#it's about people who have gone through events that are uncannily similar but have dealt it both the events and the aftermath in#drastically different ways. one of them was surrounded by people who didn't look and sometimes didn't act the part but ultimately meant#only well and the other only had one person who cared about him near him and not even that person was in a good enough place to give him#that sort of empowerment‚ the strength to try and fight against impossible odds and an inescapable situation#and i've seen takes (don't remember where) that state that rai is ultimately so much stronger than v because he managed to free himself#from the shackles of his assigned fate whereas v 'failed' to do so but like... i believe that v is equally as strong for just... existing.#and maybe the world would've been better off if he had died as soon as he learned the truth but he lived because he wanted to see a better#world and believed that him being stripped of his identity was a small price to pay for a better world but what makes him even stronger in#my eyes is the fact that he KEPT LIVING even when he realized that there was no way to make things better from his position as much as he#wanted to and when he saw that everything was going to hell and that he was doomed to just... stay there and be trapped and be forced to#work for ideas that directly oppose his own#and DESPITE ALL OF IT‚ HE KEPT HIMSELF ALIVE (until nato called and said ''hey bibo if you don't respond to the allegations we will nuke#your house'' (referring to V's OH) and bibo just. did not answer. and threw v under the bus and let him die like he was nothing#like i need you to understand this man has the mental resolve of joy herself but you aren't ready for that talk#look point is i think that if they were to ever meet rai would initially not like v at all and couldn't exactly pinpoint why he doesn't#like him - he's polite‚ relatively kind‚ a bit sassy at times‚ and really quiet‚ which in a way mirrors his own mannerisms - so he has no#clue as to why he /doesn't like him at all/ (and of course rai being rai would be polite in turn but he'd never be earnestly amiable)#UNTIL one of them tries to start a conversation about more mundane topics like music or movies and as they exchange opinions rai realizes#that he really doesn't have to bother with the whole thing about resolve and determination to pursue your own goals and differences in#ideologies and that he can just talk to this guy as if he were one of his friends from nyc from back when life was relatively normal#(aka before big shell and when the memories of his past were artificially surpressed HMM PARALLELS YES)#in conclusion v is less anti-raiden and more the second coming of joy and also the two of them would (eventually) be friends and talk about#film and music. rai would absolutely DIG some of the 80's stuff v listens to. thank you for joining me on yet another episode of 'insanity#with fionna'#zeta gear tag#i wrote a lot here and i've made some good points so in the tag it goes
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