#and he's really trying his best to learn how to fight with his left arm but it's hard
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𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕆𝕦𝕥𝕤𝕚𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕤 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤-
Ponyboy and Soda shared a room and at one point when their Parents were alive Darrel also shared a room with them. When Darrel was a kid and Soda was a newborn their Dad would try and make Soda say Dada and then Darrel started to try to get Soda to say Darry.(Soda said Darry before he said Mom or Dad) When Steve met Soda in grade school he saw him being bully(because he had problems with with mixing up Sh and Ch noises and B's and D's) and Steve help Soda with the Socs(AKA the bullys) and that's how they became best friends. When Dally was in NY he fell in love with someone who looked like Sylvia but never talked to her and then when he moved to Tulsa he thought that Sylvia was the girl from NY and really loved her but he knew that loves doesnt last forever(because of his parents). Two-Bit has let his sister do his makeup and he's been out of the house with it one time with the gang and he knew it was on and he loved it(He sister is good at makeup). When Sandy had left Soda, Steve broke up with Evie(Because Steve loves Soda and we all know it) or Evie and Steve got with Soda. Johnny has cried one other time in his life and that was in Dallys arms and Dally held him understanding his pain more then anyone in the group. Dally is the only one who is allowed to mess with Ponyboy(Except for Soda and Darry because they're his older brothers) but onw time Steve was being an asshole to Pony and Dally put him on his ass so fast and reminded him to never mess with Pony like he does.(Steve messes with Pony but not like Dally, Darry, and Soda do). One of Pony's Nick names from Darry is Horsefly and Dally called Pony Horsefly at one point and that was the only time Darry punch Dally. Two-Bit and Pony have had a fight at school with the Socs and Darry had to come pick them up and Darry looked at Two-Bit and Pony and tried to not laugh when he learned that Pony and Two-Bit beat the living shit out of the Socs. Ponyboy and Johnny had sleepover at Pony's house and that was one of the first ever sleepovers Johnny had and Johnny loved it.
#the outsiders#ponyboy curtis#sodapop curtis#darrel curtis#steve randle#two bit mathews#dallas winston#johnny cade#headcanon#im bored#first post#the outsiders headcanons
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Thanks for your insight! I had come to the same conclusion on a lot of these points.
I agree that if Jayce didn't blast him, he wasn't weakened, wouldn't have become the Herald, and was using the hexite cores to power up. However, I didn't think that Vander overloaded because Singed injected him - we see Singed use the serum (do we even know what that mysterious serum was?) on Warwick's corpse during the Evolution scene - this actually appears to be the thing that transforms Viktor, not just the apex shimmer. The apex shimmer was maybe sustaining Viktor in his cocoon but it didn't appear to be enough to heal him ("I sense my twilight approaching"). It's only when Singed injects the orange serum into Warwick, mixing with the shimmer, that we see Warwick's memories disintegrate and that serum passes into the cocoon, triggering Viktor's evolution. Now, Richter (spelling??) puts his axe through the steam-powered thingie on Warwick's back, and I thought that would have perhaps caused the overload - but he appeared alright after that. I really do think that Viktor's connection was what was stabilizing him and when it was shattered Warwick couldn't hold back that flood. If that hadn't happened, Jinx, Vi, and Cait could have gotten him out of there, changing everything, and I think Viktor would have likely refused Ambessa's pitch as he wouldn't need an army to get him to the hexgates if he believed he had Jayce on his side.
I'm still in the process of working out my thoughts on the ruined timeline, because Ambessa's a bit of a wild card as to what she'd do if the circumstances are even a bit different. She went down there with the intent of capturing Warwick, only turning her attention to Viktor once he's already in the cocoon and she learns he can create these immortal soldiers. Otherwise, she fears and resents mages. I think her intent was, in our timeline, ultimately to try and (foolishly!) harness Viktor's power for herself to fight the Black Rose, which wouldn't have worked, but regardless. I won't get off on an Ambessa tangent, tho I think her actions in the crucial few hours after Warwick decide the timeline tbh, but working it all out made me realize how quickly things in the commune happen. If Jayce had willingly joined Viktor, he would have had almost no time (like...minutes) before the rest of the events unfolded (sorry fic writers who want him chilling in the commune for weeks). I still think Jayce would have to turn against Viktor once he sees the Evolved - but he couldn't bring himself to hurt Viktor. I would guess he scrambles off to Piltover to warn the council. Things would have to play out similarly if Ambessa continues with her attack on Piltover, with Jayce knowing that Viktor was going to be in the hexheart and going down there to confront him instead - but maybe giving his best emotional 'you're still in there!' pitch. I'm still inclined to think when he kneeled atop the tower it was out of defeat, but I'm open on it.
(This brings me to another tangent, being that this surely has to be the first Jayce brought to this timeline - because husk Jayce gives over his hammer, and he can only do that once. There's, to me, something uniquely special about that hexcorized hammer that is able to really hurt Viktor/the hexcore vs just a blast from his regular hammer? Seeing as the hexite cores don't hurt Viktor, and the power of the hex crystals are one with those of the hexcore, just powering him up. But even so, if any other Jayce came and fell down that cave etc, they'd be left with no weapon after. I can't stop thinking about the rune embedded in Jayce's arm with hexcorized damage, and how it seems to be the thing that activates the hexcorized hammer, as it glows on his arm whenever he uses the hammer. I could get off into another huge thing about how I've been struggling to figure out what mage Viktor's actual plan was for our Jayce to do, and how that rune fits into it, but I digress)
I think Viktor's plan would have been, as we saw in the prime timeline, to activate the hexgate, concentrating its full power into a vertical beam which would shoot upwards through the hole in the roof, through him/through the hexcore, channeling that power into the Anomaly to enact the Glorious Evolution (thus producing the mage visual we see in the tome/Black Rose illusion). Our Viktor didn't get there, but Mage Viktor did. I also noticed like you said that there were no drones on top of the tower, but they were scattered around the city, on the bridge, in the undercity. I don't truly know if that is significant or if they just, dispersed after a while. To me they're discolored from decades of corrosion and exposure, not because they're any different from our version of the Evolved, showing how once the Evolution took place, there was nothing to do after. Everything just went silent, stood still. Viktor had no orders for them, so they just wandered off without purpose and sat to rust. Or maybe once Viktor realized what he'd done, he didn't want to even look at them so he sent them away from his eye of the storm area.
Sorry for the ramble - I wrote this out of order lmao. I have been thinking a LOT about the ruined timeline, trying to piece it together, and there's an incredible amount going on that's subtle and easy to overlook in lieu of the big stuff.
Hi! I wanted to hear your thoughts about something that keeps on nagging me about the Glorious Evolution... what's the difference between the Evolved and the Pompeii-esque husks we see in the ruined timeline? Viktor states his intent is to Evolve everyone willing and connect them into one mind but we only ever actually see him evolve his commune followers. Towards the end we see that either Viktor himself, the drone bots, or the anomaly via the mind-strings, can begin to 'assimilate' people, but that never progresses to getting Evolved. Jayce almost losing himself in golden light seems to be what happens if it's allowed to finish. So does everyone else who isn't 'touched' just get decimated by the anomaly blast? What was Viktor's intent for Jayce ultimately - I feel like he wasn't going to Evolve him, he wanted him by his side and we see in the ruined timeline that he's a husk, not a drone. I'm still struggling to make sense of these different end-states for those who get plugged into the hivemind, and how it's decided who ends up getting connected or just destroyed.
Sorry it took me a while to get to this one, it was a combination of real life and not really having an answer ready because I agree, it is vexing.
I don't quite know how to break down what happened and who is what, but I can try to make sense of it with the things we know:
In this reality, Jayce never shot Viktor through the chest. Presumably, this means Viktor continued with his plans without interruption.
Ambessa arrived at the commune before Jayce did, so his going back did not alter that event. So that would be the same in both universes. To me, this means that Viktor was heading towards his moment of disillusionment either way, either by Jayce's hands or by Ambessa.
Keep in mind, Jayce shooting Viktor is NOT why Vander went crazy. So many people miss this, but it's actually because of Singed injecting him. Admittedly, he did so while everyone's backs were turned because of the interruption of Jayce's attack but I think the full-scale conflict that broke out was quite likely in either universe, with or without Jayce.
I think what also gets lost in this discussion is what Salo was doing at the base of the Hexgates: retrieving Hex crystal cores.
So, while Viktor was running low on energy, he may have found an alternative by using Hex crystals which Jayce scuttled by killing Salo. No one else from the commune (except arguably Viktor himself) would have the authority to get into the Hexgate base without getting stopped.
As far as we know, without getting shot, Viktor never turned to Singed for Apex Shimmer via Vander/Warwick. I believe this because Wizard Viktor doesn't have the Machine Herald appearance. Arguably he's able to shed it or it's an illusion, etc etc, but truly I believe the Machine Herald appearance is a direct result of Jayce shooting Viktor and him being forced to turn to Apex Shimmer to heal.
We also know in Wizard Viktor's original timeline, Jayce probably joined him instead of shooting him. I've argued before in another meta that Jayce in Wizard Viktor's timeline likely gave into Viktor willingly at the top of the tower.
So, where does that leave us? I'm going to propose this alternate timeline:
Viktor is disillusioned by Ambessa's attack but he's not weakened because Jayce never shot him.
Using the Hex crystals Salo stole from the Hexgates, Viktor has enough power to continue assimilating people.
I'd argue: Viktor forcibly assimilates Ambessa's forces or he otherwise begins an assault on the city, perhaps with her as an ally. I only note this because it does look like there are more converted/ascended people in the Anomaly Future that there were cultists and him assimilating Ambessa's forces (including Cait, for example, but not including Jinx because her balloon is visible crashed into the Hexgate tower in the Anomaly future) is one possible explanation.
Viktor achieved this using Hex crystals, not Apex Shimmer. He was also able to do a version of the robot/ascended cultists because of the Hex crystal powers but not enough to give them that porcelain and gold "sheathe". Perhaps he didn't even feel the need to design his ascended cultists that way in this world, because he wasn't competing with Mel, because Jayce had already joined him.
Viktor then goes to the Anomaly at the base of the Hex tower. He believes that this will give him the power to convert the rest of the world and end all conflict.
And this is where things get really damn speculative but I'll try my best:
Viktor claims the Anomaly. He and Jayce go together willingly to the top of the Hexgate tower to make this vision of peace a reality using its power.
In celebration of their plan finally reaching its successful conclusion, Viktor brings Jayce into the hivemind. Jayce is kneeling in front of Viktor willingly, with his hammer held before him in fealty.
Unlike in the canon timeline, we also know Viktor didn't bring any other robots up there with him, possibly because he didn't need the show of force or to restrain a willing Jayce. (or they could have descended later I guess but eh, I'm taking my visual difference as clues where I can)
Viktor converts Jayce to be his equal, somehow, in that he's different from both the cultists and the corpses.
However, this does not bring Jayce to his level, it just adds Jayce's consciousness to the growing soup of consciousness inside Viktor's head/the Hexcore, whatever it is. Jayce is effectively dead.
Then, this moment happens, which was the goal of the Hexcore the whole time: to lay waste to civilizations who overuse magic:
The mage rising over the city.
Wizard Viktor does this either out of grief at having lost Jayce or he does so before he loses Jayce (the order isn't super important, he loses him either way) and the Hexcore takes over to finish its own goals.
Everyone who isn't already assimilated gets taken out by the subsequent violent shockwave.
I might be missing some things. Honestly, we know some things went different because Viktor was never shot, because he got Hex crystals, because Jayce might have joined him at the commune, but how the battle broke down after that is very unclear. We do know that Jinx took part in the battle because she also flew her balloon into the Hexgate tower. How exactly that battle kicked off and who the combatants were is much less clear. We do know that Viktor didn't convert all of the city before those remaining got annihilated, so something must have gone wrong with his attempt to hive mind everyone that they all died instead.
The only curious note I can't quite reconcile is Wizard Viktor's speech about, "Once every equation is solved." Because it sounds like the Hexcore, or Viktor, determined that the only way to actually stop all conflict, the way to solve the equation, is to just murder everyone.
Which... um, yeah. I guess that works! But it definitely casts Wizard Viktor as either a pawn of the Hexcore or as an absolutely terrifying psychopath if that's his definition, which by the way I'm totally cool with because I love Wizard Viktor but I can easily see him being actually insane at this point and an only mildly remorseful supervillain who's really only sad Jayce died too so there was no one to save Viktor before he ended up in this dreamless solitude. Make of that what you will too.
I still don't feel like I have a clear answer for you, but hopefully this helps!
#i have. a 14 page word doc with my ideas. it keeps growing. nothing makes sense. make it make sense.#is this show utterly genius or is it riddled with plot holes. or both#sometimes i feel incredibly stupid for not being able to grasp what they're laying down yknow?#but you're the best person I could think to discuss it with! if anyone could figure it out it's you#arcane#meta
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i just think that Wild should come back to the chain with a magic rock, I mean it's not like he would be the only one with a magic rock, Look at Twi's shadow crystal or Wind's walkie-talkie necklace, and what would we call all of Legends rings if not wearable magic rocks? The ocarina of time? MAGIC ROCK with some holes in it. You know what Hyrule's magic sword is made of? THAT'S RIGHT! MAGIC ROCKS
And guess what was left behind with no explanation in totk, that had a whole quest attached to it that stood in parallel with a bunch of other versions of the same scene where someone gets a magic rock? MINERU'S secret stone, SPIRIT SAGE LU WILD LETS GO
#too many projects but i wanna write a post-totk lu fic where Wild has no arm and a magic rock#and he's really trying his best to learn how to fight with his left arm but it's hard#but he refuses to give up and the other's kinda have to make him stop overworking himself#and it gets to the point where Wild doesn't know what he is except for a swordsman#at least he has a light dragon light bow that he can shoot with his teeth who's arrows just appear out of the air#but being the swordsman and the hero is such a major part of his identity#and hes having to be surrounded by more of the best swordsmen ever to exist and how does he deal with that#i want to give him spirit powers and have him struggle to control them and it's all in the view of the heroes#i just love giving characters new powers that are in fact powerful and forcing them to learn how to deal with them#its so fun#ramblin#lu wild#linked universe#linked universe wild
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BETTER THAN A BLANKET!
katsuki bakugou x f ! reader ᯓ★ 1.04k words. fluff / established relationship / not proofread / maybe ooc but you know… it’s a sleepy bakugou
katsuki has this habit of moving you on top of him. it’s a very pure, almost natural, but mindless action that just happens when you’re together.
it happens more frequently on a lazy, late afternoon during his off days. when the sun’s about to set and the both of you are enjoying each other’s company. laying down side by side, comfortable in each other’s silence.
the errands for the day were done and instead of going on a date outside, you opted to just get back home quickly—he definitely had no complaints at all, in fact, he was happy to stay at home with you, especially since he was barely even at home because of the several missions and emergencies he was dispatched to. to him, a big flaw of being a hero is being away from their lover for long periods of time—but it’s always more important that the world you helped widen for him is safer for you.
when you got home, you watched a few movies with him. laughing about the cheesy romcoms that’s number one on the streaming site. throwing popcorn when he mocks a cringy line. “well shit, he was really fucking stupid for that. can’t be me.” was your favorite comment from him, making a mental note in your head that he really hates slow-burn romance. definitely hates cheating routes too, thinking the whole film is a waste of time.
sooner or later, the two of you end up getting a little drowsy, wanting to take that power nap that the two of you deserved after the hell you guys went through this week. both of you are just waiting for sleep to hit and drift off in each other’s arms.
this moment you have with him is always special, never failing to tug on your heartstrings, especially since the golden shine of the sun passes through the thin curtains of your lovely home, landing perfectly on his pretty face that’s trying to blink and stay awake all because he always preferred you falling asleep first. half lidded eyes that still shined prettily accompanied by the warm rays.
when katsuki gets extra groggy and sluggish, he pulls you over on top him all too suddenly. tugging at your arm, looking at you like a puppy wanting treats. his mouth’s in a straight line yet his eyes already is saying a lot, it is one of the most expressive parts of him if he chooses not to speak.
and you let him, moving on top of him while he maneuvered you to however he liked, landing on him with a soft thud. you scoot a little bit to be more comfortable. nuzzling your face against his neck when you’re already put in place, “he smells so nice,” you think. he wraps his arms around you in such a tender embrace—you couldn’t move even if you wanted to. also spreading his legs apart so yours could stay on the mattress in case your legs get numb later on, he’s so considerate.
your arms under his while you softly cling to the sleeves of his shirt. you’re both chest to chest, almost feeling each other’s heartbeats. he loved doing this so much because you being his very own personal blanket would always bring him comfort. you’re always just so full of warmth and he always wants to feel it from head to toe—this is just the best position to have it possible.
you’ll talk for a bit, saying how you missed him all week and he grins at you. “yeah? your boyfriend left you all alone huh? what a dumbass.” and then you’ll tell him some stories about what you did at work, chatting about how the coffee machine keeps breaking cause an intern hasn’t learned to use it properly. he’d give you replies in small phrases, happily listening to your voice while fighting the drowsiness that’s kicking in. chuckles whenever your pitch gets higher from your rants. then you’d go back to telling him how you saw him at the news the other day, how you always worried a lot, which always made him a little sad but it couldn’t be helped.
but you’re pouting at him so cutely he ends up smiling. “i’m here now aren’t i?” he asks in a way that reassures you. “mhm, safe and sound.” you say, nudging your cheek against his.
you really wished time could slow down, even for just a bit, just to have katsuki all to yourself for a little while longer.
eventually your chat with him turns to a slower pace, your voice gradually getting softer and softer, and words more disconnected as your mind gets hazy with sleep.
he mumbles a small, “sleepy?” and you snuggle deeper onto him, which immediately translates to his head as a ‘yes.’ he doesn’t ‘bother’ you anymore with any other words or further conversation. instead, he kisses the top of your head while he waits for you to drift off before him. and he repeatedly tells you how much he loved you, at least in his head he did.
you’re closing your eyes while he rubs your back, soothing you into that dreamscape while you hope to see him right there next to you just like you are now.
when you wake up you’re in the same place you were in, except the extra warmth on your back with your puffy comforter that katsuki somehow placed on without waking you.
you figured it’s time to start preparing dinner from how dark the room is. yet, with the way he looked so cute sleeping so soundly under the cool hue of the moonlight you think it’s probably fine to sleep for a few more minutes.
and you kiss him just for a little while before you lay back down. not knowing he was awake a few minutes after you did and hoped you wouldn’t notice the blush that’s creeping up his cheeks. “that was dangerous,” he thought to himself. maybe it was cause he was still high off from his dream but whenever you make his heart skip a beat this much it makes him want to ask you to be his girlfriend again (i think this definitely calls for a ring katsuki!)
do not copy, plagiarize, translate, or repost my works
#bnha fluff#mha fluff#bakugou x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#mha x reader#bnha x reader#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugou fluff#bakugou fluff#bakugo fluff#katsuki bakugo fluff#my hero academia fluff#ᦾִ❤︎ by cola
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Ticci Toby General Headcannons
Summary: Basic, SFW, and NSFW head-cannons. My personal thoughts, feelings, and opinions about Toby as a character.
TW: NSFW below the cut, minors dni! Above the cut is sfw!
Words: 1.6k
A/N: NSFW is reader with female anatomy.
Basic:
- Even though he is socially awkward and tense, he’s a master at people watching. Can read a room and know more details about a person within seconds of watching them interact.
- Likes his alone time.
- He would probably say Tim and Brian are his closest friends, the same can’t be said about Masky and Hoodie, however.
- A pro at zoning out. Takes you waving your hand in his face before he snaps back.
- Bipolar? More-so emotional switch. Tends to be soft-spoken and awkward, trying his best to keep conversation while fidgeting his hands, looking anywhere but at your face. Otherwise, he’s an in-your-face, aggressive, no emotional resistance when that flip is switched. Lots of teeth gritting and yelling, swings his ax around like it’s a toy to intimidate. It takes a lot for him to get to that point, but it takes double the time for him to come back down from it.
- Not easily scared. Will throw himself into a fight and come out victorious somehow.
- Sleeper build. Wears lots of baggy clothing and layers so you can’t tell, but secretly he’s jacked. He may look scrawny, but don’t be fooled. Really strong shoulder and chest muscles from dually swinging his ax and dragging bodies around. He doesn’t think it’s all that impressive. Wishes he was bigger.
- The worst posture you’ve ever seen.
- Let his facial hair grow out from time to time. Thinks it makes him look too mature, but appreciates the compliments he gets.
- Has a secret hobby of playing a guitar he found on a mission. His tics mess him up a lot, but it’s worth the trip out deeper into the woods where no one can hear to practice a little.
- A little shit.
- Hates the heat. Would rather freeze to death than spend one moment in the too hot sun. Favorite season is late fall, around the first snowfall time.
- Big on territory. Never had privacy or respect as a kid so he values having his own things and belongs that nobody else can touch.
- Definitely shy, but not in the “UwU” way, in the “Can you get this from the gas station for me? The girl in there looks mean.”
- Bites his nails, the skin around his nails, and his cuticles LIKE A MF.
- Very light sleeper. Unless he’s absolutely dead beat exhausted, he’ll wake up from just the floorboards creaking. Has to be physically exhausted to actually rest.
- When listening to music, he needs it as loud and close as possible. Headphones are a must and they must be at max. He wants to feel that bass.
- A stray animal lover, feels similar to them in a way.
- Breaks down a lot. Hard to console or even talk to in those moments but some time alone in his room will do the trick.
- Has the education level of a middle schooler.
- Enjoys Gorillaz, Rainbow Kitten Surprise, and surprisingly, older country artists like Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson. “Outlaw shit.”
Dating Him/SFW:
- “Love” “Y/N…” “Baby”
- Loves when he touches you and you don’t pull away. Like when his knee accidentally rests against yours or his elbow bumps your arm while sitting on the couch and you don’t tug away, just sitting there letting him rest. He gets all giddy.
- Playing with your hair. Currently trying to learn how to braid.
- “Wait. O- Okay, so, right th- then left? No? F- Fuck, okay…”
- Favorite sleeping position is with you wrapping around each other, legs and arms tangled together as he hooks his chin onto the top of your head, rubbing your back. Even though you both get extremely hot and sweaty after a while, Toby enjoys the moment before you eventually shove him off.
- Likes to feel your body weight on him, whether it’s laying or sitting, he just likes the pressure and warmth you give.
- Big on physical touch, could really care less if he’s mad or not, just needs to have some part of his body touching yours.
- You could wear or look like absolutely anything and he’d still think you’re the most gorgeous thing he’s ever seen.
- Loves how you smell after getting out of the shower, can’t get enough of it while he kisses your warm, damp skin.
- Loves the way it feels when you comb through his hair with your fingers, practically purrs as he melts into your warmth, angling his head so you have better access.
- An admirer for sure, stares even when you catch on, studying every freckle or sunspot on your cheek.
- Self conscious about being your boyfriend. In reality, he’s an amazing lover, but he’s been conditioned his whole life that he’s not good enough and that ideal carries over.
- Tried to lick you through the hole in his cheek once, you both freaked out.
- Sensitive to high stress situations or loud noises so constantly reaches for your hand or crams himself into your side to block out the panic he can feel oncoming. You really help.
- Slasher movie date nights are always a bust because he’ll describe just how inaccurate that blood splatter was, followed by what would actually happen in detail.
- “If he c- cut the arm like that, it wou- wouldn’t spray out that far. This g- guy doesn’t even l- look like he’s ever even he- held an ax before.”
- Didn’t have a favorite color until you told him yours. Says his is the same, just cause it’s your favorite.
- Very immature in the sense of relationship problems. He thinks everything can be solved if he just avoids it, and that includes you. It takes a lot of bickering and patience, but he’ll eventually get over himself and force a solution.
- Doesn’t open up about anything ever. You’ve gotta fight tooth and nail for him to even mention his mother’s name. Will tell you all about his latest mission, however, whether you want to hear or not.
- Throws things or hits you playfully just to turn around and go “Who did that??”
Dating Him/NSFW:
- Boobs. Tits. Breasts. He needs them in his palms immediately.
- A big biter. Will never bite hard enough to draw blood but gets so turned on at seeing his teeth marks in your skin. Big territory thing.
- “Mine. See, I m- marked ‘ya. You’re mine.”
- His dream is to fuck your tits, too shy to ask though.
- Always been a “jerk off as fast as you can” kind of guy, fisting his cock fast to just get off. So when you slowly slide down his cock for the first time, taking your time to adjust and grind your hips at a steady pace, he nearly cums on the spot from how overwhelming it is.
- Bisexual, definitely.
- Starts at a fast pace at first, thrusting and grinding until both of your hips hurt, but then slowly his pace changes, more intentional movements and sinking deeper, more focused on stretching you out then getting deep. Just wants to get you dizzy before he gives you the good stuff lol.
- “Th- That feel good? You’re sq- squeezin’ so tight, ah-”
- His fingernail imprints all over your skin from how hard he holds you.
- Pervert but not in a creepy way. Pervert as in gets a boner from just watching your ass as you walk across the room. Has to clench his fists every time you bend over or raise your shirt up. Can barely breathe if you’re showing too much skin.
- Not big on degradation, but is very big on affirmation, loves to be told he’s doing good.
- Secretly, sooooo secretly loves the idea of anal. For both you and him. He wants to be buried in your ass, your back laid into his chest as he shoves his fingers into your cunt, panting into your neck. But at the same time, wishes you would just read his mind and push your fingers into his, fisting his cock as you stretched him so well.
- Surprisingly, very flexible. Whatever position you’re in he can easily contort to get the best angle to sink his cock in.
- Jealousy sex. Another resident of the mansion catches your glance for too long and suddenly you’re shoved into the bathroom, pants at your ankles as the brunette swipes the pads of his fingers against your clit, biting against your shoulder as he ruts into your ass.
- “Mine, mine, m- mine, nobody els- else makes you feel this good. Right? R- Right? Yeah?”
- A WHINER. Grade A pro at burying his face into your neck/pillow/chest and just sobbing his pleasure through tears and moans. He’s so loud, obnoxiously groaning and huffing as you slap your hand over his mouth. It doesn’t help though, as soon as your hand pushes down his tongue is already out and licking your palms.
- You in his hoodie? Yeah, it’s the only thing you’re wearing while he snaps his hips, pushing your knees back as far as they’ll go to get even deeper, mewling about how good you look.
- Loves to sit back and watch you suck his cock, his fingers pushing strands of hair out of your face as you try to take it all in, eyes twitching the further down you get. He’s not insanely big, just lengthy enough to make you choke and reach all the best parts. Likes to put his goggles on your forehead and watch them dangle as you bob up and down.
- Cumming in you? No. Cumming on you? Every single time. Goes absolutely crazy when he sees his seed shot across your stomach or thighs, your flushed skin and post-orgasm twitches getting him so turned on he can’t focus.
- “You ju- just look so good… Couldn’t he- help myself, okay? Sorry… Can we, u- uh… Can we go ag- again?”
Thank you for reading!
Comments and reblogs are appreciated! 𐚁₊⊹
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Cherry Red, Crimson Blood
Chapter 20: The New Normal
Summary: Your pack settles into a routine as you learn to adapt to the shifting relationships between all of you.
Pairings: Poly 141 x reader, Price x Gaz
Word Count:
Warnings: NSFW, 18+, p in v sex, unprotected sex, threesome, BDSM elements, dry humping, language, Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, angst, PTSD, flashbacks, nightmares, smoking, Gaz being the prettiest boy alive.
A/N: Not much to say about this one. Hope it's worth a two week wait...
MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->
A yelp leaves your lips as your feet leave the ground, your body hitting the floor rather ungracefully. You roll from the force of the impact, stopping flat on your back. You stare up at the ceiling, trying to catch the breath that was forced from your lungs from your impact with the floor.
“You left yourself too open again.”
“Well how was I supposed to know which way you were moving?” You say, slowly pushing yourself back up to sit as you catch your breath.
“You can’t, that’s why you have to keep yourself guarded at all times. Anyone you’re fighting will do worse than that as soon as your guard is down.”
You stare at Simon’s shoes as he stops a foot away from you. The laces are pulled to the exact same tension on both sides, double knotted to avoid them coming undone and becoming a tripping hazard. Even the way his crew socks are pulled up over the legs of his sweatpants speaks volumes of how on guard he is. Always ready for a fight, always ready so that nothing can get in his way and put him at risk.
He lets out a quiet sigh as he drops down into a squat in front of you. “How have you been sleeping?”
Your gaze finally leaves his shoes, trailing up his legs to his arms where they rest on his knees. You follow the lines of his tattoos until you reach where his shirt sleeve covers the rest. You work your way up until you reach his mask-covered face, finally meeting his brown eyes. There's a softness to them now you've never noticed before, something you might not have taken notice of now had you not become brave enough to look that deep.
“Better,” You clear your throat, dropping your gaze to the mat. “But still not great.”
This morning had started with you shaking in Johnny's hold, his arms wrapped tightly around you as he whispered soft reassurances in your ear. The nightmares haven't gone away since your confession, nor have they even really lessened, but at least now you aren’t suffering alone when they wake you from your sleep. At least now your pack knows how to best comfort you when your mind insists on silently torturing you.
You still haven’t slept alone since they returned, nor have you spent any great length of time in your room. There’s still a lingering feeling of someone watching, of something staring at you from inside the walls. You’ve checked while they were at training for any cameras you might have missed, but you’ve come up empty handed. Maybe it was just the knowledge that your safe space had been invaded causing that paranoid itching in the back of your mind to linger. None of the guys have complained about you staying with them at night, though perhaps you have your confession about your nightmares to thank for that.
“The nightmares?” Ghost asks, snapping you from your thoughts.
You nod. “Yeah.”
The risk of them finding out about your nightmares has made you less afraid to sleep, but still the fear of what horrible scene your mind will come up with keeps you awake. You pull your knees to your chest, making yourself small as you sit in front of him. He’s just so big, so broad and bulky, truly the ideal specimen of a perfect alpha. He’s the kind of alpha your fellow omegas at the institute would whisper about. Some big, strong protector who would provide for them and keep them safe and satisfied.
If only they could see you now.
Despite the shift in your relationship with Simon, things haven’t changed much. He’s still the quiet, looming figure behind you, posing a silent threat to anyone who might think about approaching you. He still places a hand on your back to steer you, still stands closer behind you than he used to, still looks at you with a softer look in his eyes than you’ve ever seen before. Sometimes you’re tempted to push that boundary first, to lean in and rest your head on his broad chest, feel the muscle under his shirt again. You want to press up against his back while he sleeps and let his warmth seep into your bones. Sometimes when you’re alone and your thoughts begin to run rampant, you think about how you have nothing to fear because Simon would rip the face off anyone who tried anything.
Of course, he has to be here in order to do that.
You won’t have to be alone again. John had promised you that much. He’d fight harder to make sure you’re not alone again. Not, at least, for a while if it can be avoided.
“You’re thinking too much again.” Simon says, pulling you from your thoughts for a second time.
You stare at him, suddenly realizing he’s moved closer to you. You’re not sure when he did, too caught up in your own thoughts to be aware of your surroundings. It’s dangerous, your ability to sink into your mind and get lost there. You know it and they know it. Yet you can’t help it. It’s safer in your head, easier to exist in a place where you’re in control, where you can predict what’s going to happen next.
Simon’s hand wraps around your ankle, tugging you closer to him. You fall flat on your back on the mat, body sliding partially under his. He looms over you, settling his weight across your thighs as his hands come to rest on either side of your head. Your eyes are wide as you stare up at him, your heart pounding in your chest, as it usually does when you’re in this position.
“Now, what do you do when someone pins you?” He asks, the sharpness back in his gaze as he stares down at you.
Lay here and don’t move, or at least that’s what you want to do currently. He’s just so big and warm, and the way he makes you feel so small under him has your head spinning. How you wish he’d press his body into yours, let you feel him completely. The scents in the air begin to thicken as you find your head tilting back on instinct, baring your throat to him in submission.
His hand closes around your chin, forcing your gaze back on his. “Focus.” He says, projecting his scent more to try and cover yours. It goes straight to your head, your gaze sharpening just slightly as you stare up at him. The scent of alpha around you has your mind racing in several different directions. You know you should be afraid, but it’s Simon. You know him, you trust him. He’d never hurt you intentionally, but he’s still an alpha.
The strong musky scent has something in the back of your head prickling, your instincts teetering on the edge of safety and danger. You know the alpha over you, but what if it was someone else? That was the point of all of this, right? You won’t be fighting off Simon or John. It will be someone unfamiliar, someone who wants to hurt you.
Simon’s fingers leave your chin, trailing down your neck. Your pulse thrums faster as his fingers near the base of your throat. The scent of alpha is strong in your nose. How easily he could slip his hand around the back of your neck and squeeze, rendering you brainless and under his control.
Your mind goes blank and you move without even thinking. Your fist slams into his side right where he’d taught you to hit. He buckles at the sudden attack and you use his moment of surprise and disorientation to free one of your legs and drive your knee right into his stomach. You push him off of you, scrambling back a couple feet before your mind begins to clear. Simon lays on the mat, almost wheezing as he tries to get the air back into his lungs.
You flounder there for a moment, watching the giant alpha you had just incapacitated. You don’t know where that came from or how you’d managed it. No, that’s not totally true. You know where the fear had come from, but you also know Simon would never do something like that to you.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You say, shifting onto your knees in case Simon retaliates, in case he gets angry at you for attacking him. “I don’t know what just happened.”
“The hell are you apologizing for?” He coughs out, pushing himself onto his side. “That was bloody brilliant.”
You blink in surprise, taken aback by his response. “What?”
“That’s what you were supposed to do.” He says, pushing himself the rest of the way up onto his knees. “I asked what you should do if you’re pinned, and you did it.”
You continue to stare at him, not quite sure how to process the sort-of praise from him. He had asked you what you should do if you were pinned, and you had done what you were supposed to do. It hadn’t quite been for the right reasons, but you did do something correctly. You managed to incapacitate him enough to get out from underneath him, and without him going easy on you.
Maybe the training is working after all.
“Do that in a fight, you might just give yourself enough time to run.” He says, pushing himself up to stand. “Good job.”
You continue to stare at him as he passes you, heading to the bench where your belongings sit. You’re still kneeling there on the mat in surprise. You hadn’t expected such genuine praise from him. But why not? He’s doing this to train you, to teach you how to defend yourself against anyone who might want to hurt you. Anyone who’s stupid enough to try something when they’re not here to defend and protect you.
Something that’s already happened.
You’ve finally managed to defend yourself, to apply the things he’s spent weeks teaching you successfully. Why shouldn’t he be proud of you for that?
You’re still getting used to this new side of him, this accepting side, the softness that he’s showing you in his own way. It’s what you wanted, what you’ve been trying to achieve for weeks now, and now that you have it...you’re not quite sure what to do with it. Where does the boundary lie? What if you push too far? Will things go back to the way they were before? Will he shut you out completely?
Hands slip under your arms, lifting you to your feet. You turn, your head tilting back to stare up at Simon. He’s wearing that emotionless mask on his face, or at least that’s what you picture as you stare up at his eyes. It’s the look he carries the most, giving away nothing and effectively hiding what he’s feeling. You wish you could see his face. You’ve tried to draw up images of what he might look like, what he hides under the mask. He can’t be ugly, at least not totally. Johnny had reassured you of that much, but you wish for just a glimpse more than his chin and his lips when he eats.
“You’re thinking too much again.” He says, taking half a step back from you.
“Sorry.” You blink, trying to pull yourself from the depths of your mind once again.
“Come on. Let’s get breakfast.” He says, tilting his head towards the door.
You follow him from the gym, his steps markedly slower compared to how he used to walk. Gone are the days of almost having to run to keep up with him. You could almost swear he takes smaller steps too, instead of his normal long, purposeful strides. It’s almost as if he’s out for a stroll instead of being forced into the task of escorting you to breakfast.
His hand finds your back again as you enter the mess, guiding you through the tables to the line to get food. His palm is warm where it’s pressed against the middle of your back, his fingers splayed, pressing just slightly into your skin through your shirt as an alpha soldier passes just slightly too close to you.
He still won’t fill your tray for you, but you can respect that. It’s a big step, and only done if there’s interest in courting or caretaking. You don’t expect that level of intimacy from him, certainly not right now. Perhaps never.
He’s not your alpha.
He guides you to the table where the others are sitting, and you take your normal spot between John and Kyle. They both shift just slightly closer to you almost subconsciously. Everything is almost a subconscious action now. Simon’s guiding hand on your back, your alpha moving closer to you, the betas keeping you between them whenever you’re with them. It’s a good sign, or at least you think it is. It feels right, a sort of easy flow that has developed between the five of you. One you don’t have to think very hard about.
“How did trainin’ go?” Johnny asks between shoveling bites of eggs into his mouth.
“Fine.” You shrug. “Simon threw me across the mat.”
All eyes at the table turn to him despite your nonchalant tone. It wasn’t the first time it’s ever happened, and you’re sure it won’t be the last.
“She took me down herself afterwards.” Simon says, not bothering to look up from his porridge.
Now all eyes at the table are on you. Your cheeks warm and you slowly start to make yourself smaller under their gazes.
“Had her pinned and she disarmed me enough to get free.” Simon continues, his gaze lifting so he’s staring at you too.
“Christ, what I would pay tae see that.” Johnny says, grinning widely at you.
“So training is paying off then.” John says, patting your back gently.
“Guess so.” You shrug, still feeling a bit bashful under the attention. “Not sure how useful I’d be in a real fight still.”
“Well, your first defense is trying to escape. Running is always the priority, remember?” John says.
You nod. Right. Run first. Like you should have opened the window and ran when that beta knocked on your door. Like you should have run when you noticed your door was open. Like you should have run when someone tried to get into your room.
How disappointed they’d be if they knew how you failed to follow even the most basic instructions. What would have happened if you hadn’t noticed the cameras? Would whoever tried to get into your room that night still have tried to enter? What if the door had been unlocked? What if they had gotten in? What would you have done, then? Try to disarm them enough to run to Dr. Keller?
That is what you were supposed to do.
Instead you had been stupid and froze in your fear and let it all happen, and now you can’t even tell them. It’s too late, it’s been too long. They’d be too upset if you confessed now instead of if you’d done it right when they returned.
You have to bury it now and hope it stays that way for the rest of time.
John is the one that walks you back to the barracks after breakfast. You don’t remember the last time he walked you to a meal or back from it. Usually he was too busy doing his job, or setting up things, or whatever else it is he does. Walking you back to the barracks was far too menial a task for how busy he is.
You hold his hand as you walk, close enough that his arm brushes your side with every step. You don’t let go of his hand even when he walks you to your door, keeping your fingers laced as you turn to look up at him.
“You gonna be alright on your own?” He asks, staring down at you with a soft look in his eyes.
No. You’re almost tempted to say it, to throw your arms around him and confess, to beg him to keep you close, to stay, to take you with him. Anything so you won’t have to be alone ever again.
You swallow the lump in your throat as you nod. “Yeah.”
For a moment, just a moment you think he doesn't believe you. There’s a second of hesitation, a cold chill running down your spine as your anxiety spikes. What if he knows you’re lying? What if he’s testing how long you’ll keep up the charade? How long you’ll try to keep them in the dark about what happened. He knows something is wrong. He can tell.
Your back meets your door as he crowds you in, releasing your hand so he can press both into the wood on either side of you. Something warm stirs in your stomach as you stare up at him, feeling very small as he looms over you.
He lets out a low rumble in his chest as he leans down. For a moment you’re expecting a kiss, but he moves to the side at the last moment, nudging your chin so it’s tilted up, bearing your throat to him. “What’s got you so worked up, huh?” He murmurs against your neck, his beard prickling the sensitive skin. “Have we been neglecting you for too long?”
Saying yes wouldn’t be a lie. They haven’t really sought you out in that way since their return. The most you’ve gotten in the last almost two weeks was when Johnny slipped his hand into your sleep shorts, and you returned the favor. John and Kyle hadn’t really even tried to initiate anything, treating you more like you’d shatter into a million pieces if they touched you too much.
Maybe a good fuck would solve some of your issues.
It would at least help you forget for a while.
A quiet moan leaves your lips as John sucks on your mark, the imprint of his teeth scarred into your skin. The mark that claims you as his, bonded to him for the rest of your life.
Lust and desire burns hot in your veins and you find yourself cupping his face, tugging him away from your neck so you can kiss him. He lets out a growl against your lips as you kiss him like you want to devour him, your hands sliding to his shoulders to tug him closer to you. His hands drop from the door to rest on your hips, pulling you flush against him. You can feel him, his cock hardening through his cargo pants.
You’d let him take you right here, right now, right in the hallway. You don’t care that anyone could walk in at any moment, anyone would be able to see you. It feels almost like it would cleanse the barracks, free you from the fear in your mind. Allowing yourself to be so vulnerable out in the open could wipe away the worry that there’s someone around every corner, someone watching you.
Getting railed by your alpha against the very door that separated you from the room that now held your worst nightmares might just fix you.
But, just like everything else that’s happened recently, you don’t get that chance.
John’s watch begins to beep in your ear, causing him to pull away from you. You let out a quiet whine as you’re forced apart, suddenly feeling chilled from the loss of warmth against you.
John lets out a quiet sigh, leaning his forehead against yours. “I have to go.”
You wish he didn’t. You’re half tempted to beg him to stay, to fuck his job, his duties. You want him to stay, to give all his attention to you, just for a few hours. You want him to erase the fear and the anxiety and fix you.
“We’ll continue this later.” There’s a promise to his tone that he’s not done with you, a guarantee that you will get to continue this once the day is over, when he can go back to being your alpha instead of a captain. He leans in, kissing you once more. “Be a good girl for me, yeah?”
You nod, watching him walk out of the barracks, the door closing softly behind him. You lean against your door for a few moments longer before letting out a breath. There’s still warmth swirling in your stomach, your underwear sticking to your damp folds. An idea pops into your head. You don’t want to go into your room, you don’t want to be in there alone right now.
Instead you head for Price’s room, unbuttoning your pants as you close the door behind you. You strip out of your pants before you climb onto the bed, making yourself comfortable. You’re going to give him a little present, a little something in revenge for leaving you high and dry, a little something to help him look forward to tonight.
Screaming. It’s all you can hear. It makes your ears ring and your head throb. Hands cling to you, nails biting into your skin. Something’s pulling on you, trying to rip you away. You’re stuck in a brutal tug of war. It hurts, but no one can hear you over the screaming. Tears are sliding down your cheeks, blazing a trail along your skin. You shouldn’t be crying, you shouldn’t be upset.
He hates it when you cry.
Alphas don’t cry.
You’re not an alpha.
You’ve committed the worst sin in his eyes, denying him the perfect pack. You’re a stain on his perfect ledger, a mistake that never should have happened.
He’s going to make sure you’re wiped from memory, from history, just as he wants.
“You can’t take her from me!” Your mother’s voice is frantic, her nails biting into your arm as she tries to pull you back into the safety of your arms.
“She’s no daughter of mine.” Your father’s fingers dig painfully into your other arm, trying to pull you away from your mother, away from your life. He’s going to throw you out like you’re nothing more than trash.
The screaming gets louder as you’re yanked from your mother’s hold, and you’re not sure if it’s her screams or your own piercing your ears.
“We have to ensure the success of this program.” The voice has changed. It’s not the cruel hands of your father holding you anymore. “It’s imperative to the future of militaries around the world.”
“No!” You scream, kicking, fighting, lashing out, but the hands won’t let go. They’re like a vice around you, like a constrictor slowly getting tighter and tighter.
“All you have to do is be a good omega,” A hand slips around the back of your neck, your skin burning from the touch. The warning is screaming in your head, louder than the screams of protest spilling from your lips. “And do exactly as you’re told.”
The fingers dig into your neck, your mind flashing for a second before it goes blank.
“No!”
You move before you’re even fully awake, sitting up straight in bed. Your hands close around the back of your neck as you curl into yourself, taking a defensive, protective position. You can still feel the cold hand on your skin, the fingers biting into the sensitive spots on your neck. You’re crying, tears and snot dripping down your face as you press it against your knees.
“No!” Another terrified cry leaves your lips as hands meet your skin, not cold or clammy, but warm and gentle. Your half asleep brain is stuck in your nightmare and can't rationalize the difference, not while you're perceiving everything as a threat.
“Easy, easy.” A voice says, speaking quietly, calmly. You recognize that voice. It’s not one from your dreams. Arms slowly wind around you, pulling you against a warm chest. “I’ve got you. It was just a dream.”
Your breaths are rapid and shaky as you slowly begin to come back to your senses. It was just a dream. You’re awake now. You know that voice.
“Alpha?” You whimper, desperately seeking the confirmation that it’s really him, that you’re really awake and free from your nightmare.
“I’m here.” He says, clutching you tightly against his chest. “Need you to breathe for me.” He pushes your head against his chest so you can feel his breaths.
You’re still crying, your breaths catching in your chest almost painfully as you attempt to follow your alpha’s deep, steady breaths. His arms are still tight around you, pinning you against his chest. His beard tickles your forehead as he leans his chin against your head. He’s projecting his scent, the smell of earth and petrichor mixed with the musk of alpha seeping into your brain.
“Good girl.” He praises you as you begin to relax, your joins unlocking from their stiffened positions, your muscles slowly loosening from how contracted they had been in your defensive position. You could have slipped into distress easily in that position, the level of fear higher than you’ve felt in a long time.
He loosens his hold on you just slightly as you begin to unravel yourself as you calm down. Your hands are still clamped around the back of your neck, your fingers trembling from how stiffly they’re held against your most vulnerable spot.
“Keep relaxing.” He says quietly, his lips brushing your hairline. “I’ve got you.”
He continues to speak to you quietly, letting you work yourself out of your tense, defensive position. You slowly begin to slide your hands away from your neck as your mind begins to clear and you realize there’s no threat to you, nothing waiting just outside your line of vision to attack. Your alpha has you, you’re safe with him, well protected.
The tears continue to fall, however, as you think back on your nightmare. It had felt so real, maybe because in a way it had been real. You had been pulled from your mother, from your home to the institute, then from the institute to the CIA, from the CIA to here and straight into General Shepherd's lap.
“Promise me,” You gasp out, your voice hoarse from crying. “Tell me you’ll never scruff me.”
“Never.” He says, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I promise I’ll never scruff you.”
You press your face into his chest, breathing out a quiet sigh of relief. He could always go back on his word, he could change his mind, decide you needed to be scruffed. You know it’s foolish, having those kinds of thoughts. He’s never once gone back on his word, never once proved himself untrustworthy to you.
“I need to know if you've ever been scruffed before.” He asks, the authority slipping into his voice.
A frown pulls at your brows. You can’t remember if you’ve ever been scruffed before. Was it possible you had, but had been made to forget? Everything you’ve learned about scruffing says you would know, even if you don’t remember what happened after. It’s a very distinct feeling returning to your mind afterwards. It’s just something you’d know.
“No? I-I don’t think so?” You say. “At least I can’t remember, but I think it’s one of those things that you would know if it happened.”
“I’ve seen it happen, and I’ve seen the aftermath. You would know if it had ever happened to you.”
His words bring a shred of relief to your worried mind. You don’t want to know, you don’t want to ask how he knows, why he knows. It’s not likely he would have been able to tell you anyway. Just another secret, just another thing kept in the dark. You knew from early on they’d have their secrets, things they wouldn’t ever be able to tell you. You just never expected to have one of your own.
You curl up closer against his chest, pushing the thoughts and the guilt hanging over your head away in favor of soaking up the calming presence of your alpha. For a moment, just a moment, you can imagine everything will be alright. What’s in the past will stay there and nothing will come back to haunt you. You can just move on, and pretend like nothing happened.
You know it’s not true, but for just a moment, you can pretend that it is.
He hates it.
He hates the way he feels.
The subtle change to his heart rate, the way his insides feel like they’re fluttering, twisting. The disappointment eating him when his existence is ignored entirely in favor of those who were brave enough to open up, to allow you in.
Why is he disappointed? He’s done nothing but brush you off, keep you desperately at arms length despite your attempts to wiggle in through the slowly widening cracks in his resolve. Cracks that were formed by your very insertion into their lives. They were happy, they were fine. Then you came along and fucked everything up.
The worst part?
He likes it.
He wanted to hate you. For so long he fought that desire in him to be near an omega again, to be close enough to smell your sickeningly sweet scent. He tried to hate you, tried to ignore you, push you away from the walls he’s spent decades building up. Walls that threatened to crumble thanks to your very existence.
He’s not sure when the change happened. It was gradual, a shift in his hatred that became fascination that quickly morphed into something more. Something forbidden. Maybe it was when you submitted to him during training, or maybe it was after your first time with Johnny when his beta had looked far too pleased, and shared the intimate details of what you had done to him far too easily. Johnny’s need to yap had won out and his beta’s words had caused a stirring in his stomach he hasn’t felt in a long time.
A stirring he’d been able to ignore for so long.
For a moment, just a moment there had been fleeting curiosity. Would you try to take control with him? What if he let you do it? How long could you keep it up before you tired out and your true nature took over?
He stuffed those thoughts into the far recesses of his mind, refusing to allow them forward. He’s not getting soft, he’s not going to allow you any closer to his already cracking walls.
He tells himself that, at least until they leave. Until he sees the effect you have on his pack. The ripples in the bonds, the changes that happen almost as soon as the ramp of the plane shuts, separating you from them for the first time since your arrival.
He’s a good soldier. He can pretend nothing’s wrong, force the feelings into the back of his mind better than anyone. At least, that’s what he tells himself.
It had hurt when you ignored him on your return, throwing yourself into Price’s arms desperately and clinging to him like he might disappear. The betas had sandwiched you between them, letting you cling to them desperately as you trembled and cried. It was pathetic, but not quite as pathetic as the bitterness and the sting of disappointment in his chest.
He tried not to let himself feel it, tried to bury himself in his paperwork, tried to keep the feelings at bay, at least until Johnny had knocked on his door, mattress in tow telling him to get a blanket and head for Price’s room.
It was Kyle’s idea. Had to be. Kyle is the most nurturing of the four of them, and judging by the state of you, he must have done it because he thought it would help.
By the time he grew the balls to enter the makeshift nest, the betas had already sandwiched you between them, your form almost smothered completely under Johnny. Price had laid himself out on Kyle’s other side, and the space for him was made up of mostly Johnny’s mattress. It had to have been a deliberate move, meant for his own comfort. Sweet Johnny and his beta senses. He probably didn’t even realize what he’d done. It had just happened naturally.
It’s at Johnny’s pestering insistence that he climbs into the nest finally, laying stiffly on the mattress behind his beta. It’s been a long time since he’s been in a nest. He doesn't sleep, not much anyway, but neither does Price. Both of them are too awake, too aware, too alert. The betas sleep peacefully and so do you, probably the most sleep you’ve gotten since your heat.
The warmth in the room gets unbearable fast, the blankets quickly kicked to the end of the mattresses, along with his own sweatshirt. It’s like a sauna, and for a moment he considers opening the window, but he’s too afraid to move, too afraid to disturb the nest.
It’s when Johnny gets up to go to the bathroom that you finally move, the first time in hours. You roll into the space he had vacated, lips slightly parted as you breathe in and out easily. Johnny, the bastard, takes your empty spot, trapping you between them. He turns his back to you in hopes you stay as still as you had before, which works for a while. At least, until he feels something press up against his back. He goes still, every muscle tensing as you bury your face between his shoulder blades. He should turn over, push you away. He should nudge you back towards Johnny, let you seek out his warmth instead. Yet, he can’t bring himself to move.
He shouldn’t like it. He can’t. He can’t allow you in, he can’t let you past his rapidly crumbling walls. Yet, he does like it. He wants to feel you pressed against him, he wants to see that hidden part of you that had brought his beta to his knees so easily.
He’s supposed to be keeping his distance, and yet, here you are, forcing your way in again. It almost feels like a silent apology for yesterday, your subconscious picking up on his disappointment, and so now it’s offering him this moment in hopes he’ll forgive you.
It’s working.
A quiet breath leaves your lips as you listen to the steady beating beneath your ear. The scent of coconut and saltwater floats in the air, taking your mind far away, back to a different time when things were simpler. Kyle’s calloused fingers trail across your arm, drawing absentminded patterns across your skin. You press your face against his warm skin, your hand splaying across his stomach. You can feel the ridges of his muscles, the way they flex with every breath.
“What’s on your mind?” He asks, his lips brushing your forehead as he speaks.
“Just thinking about when we used to go to the beach when I was younger. Back when my dad was stationed in North Carolina for a few months.”
“You like the beach?” He asks.
You nod. “Yeah. There’s just something calming about it. I don’t mind the sand and I like the sound of the waves hitting the shore.”
“We could go to the beach.” He says, making you tilt your head up just slightly. “When the weather’s nicer, closer to summer. Take a few days off, go on a vacation.”
“You could do that?” You ask, pushing yourself up on your elbow so you can see him fully.
He smiles at you, his hand dropping to your back. “We do get to go on leave every so often, barring nothing urgent happens while we’re away. I’ll talk to Price about it. We can start making some plans, if you want.”
You stare down at him, the softness in his gaze, the slight upward tilt of his lips. He might as well have just promised you the world with how he’s looking at you. Tears burn at the back of your eyes as you stare at him. You don’t deserve it, you don’t deserve such kindness, such care after lying to them. You can trust Kyle. He’d be the least angry, at least towards you, if you confessed right now. It would be so easy, but you’re not sure you could stand watching the love and happiness fade from his eyes as you confessed to your stupidity, your deception.
“What is it?” He asks, his brows furrowing. Of course he’d pick up on the shift of your emotions, the sudden anxiety twisting in your stomach. “We don’t have to go to the beach. We could do something else, or nothing at all.”
“It’s not that.” You say, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I just...I don’t deserve you. All of you. You’re too good to me.”
“Oh, love, that’s not true.” He says, gently cupping your cheek. “I think it’s quite the opposite, actually. You’re too good for us. The things we’ve seen, the things we’ve done. We’re not good people, and yet we were blessed with an absolute angel.”
Tears gather in your eyes for a different reason now. You certainly don’t feel like an angel. You’re too broken and you’ve lied and made stupid mistakes. “I’m hardly an angel.”
“Well, in comparison to us, you are.” He gently presses against your back, drawing you closer to his face. “Our angel, our sweet little omega.”
A shiver runs down your spine from the way your status sounds from his lips. His hand slides to the back of your head, pulling you down so your forehead is pressed against his. You can feel his breath on your lips, your tongue darting out to wet your own in anticipation.
He tastes like mint toothpaste, his tongue immediately pushing past the seam of your lips. His kiss steals your breath away, his hand tangling in your hair to keep you in place as he licks into your mouth. Your hand settles on his chest for balance, feeling his heart racing under your palm.
You shift over him, throwing a leg across his hips as you settle against his chest. His hand releases your hair, tracing a line down your spine to your hips. The shirt of his you had changed into before crawling into bed with him has ridden up, revealing the lacy panties you're sporting underneath. He groans against your lips as his fingers trace over the lace before slipping underneath, tugging them lightly.
You pull away from his lips, staring down at him. “I’m gonna need more pairs of these at this rate.”
“We’ll have to take a trip and pick up more.” He grins, snapping the waistband against your skin.
You bite your lip, pressing yourself up so you’re sitting over his hips. You can feel the growing bulge beneath his shorts as you begin to grind against him. He’s gone commando, your clit catching on his head through the thin fabric. Your hands press into his stomach, feeling the muscles contract as your scent thickens in the air. His hands close around your hips, guiding you as you grind against him. His eyes are hooded as he stares up at you, his teeth sinking into his lower lip.
You stare down into those big brown eyes, getting lost in the depth of them. If you could melt yourself into him, seep under his skin and become one with him, you would. He might be the most beautiful person you’ve ever laid eyes on. He might as well be sculpted from marble, or pulled right from a piece of artwork.
You shift so you’re leaning forward, your clit dragging against his stomach as you continue moving your hips. You grasp his chin, fingers digging into his cheeks. “You’re so fucking pretty, it’s not fair.”
He chuckles, giving you a dazzling, perfect smile. “Thank you, love.” He wraps his arms around you, pushing himself up to sit so you drop into his lap. “But I’m nothing compared to you right now.”
He keeps you grinding against his lap, his hands squeezing your ass as you soak the front of his shorts with every drag of your hips. Your head falls back as you moan, the friction against your clit quickly pushing you towards an orgasm.
“Haven’t even touched you yet and got you all worked up. You could cum just like this, couldn’t you?” He nips playfully at your lips, sliding his hand down further to press against your lace covered pussy.
You let out a whine, releasing your hold around his shoulders long enough to tug off your shirt. He curses quietly as your skin is revealed to him, his hands trailing up your back.
“Fucking hell, love.” He groans, pushing his hips up into you.
“Kyle,” You moan his name, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Need you.”
He curses again, wrapping his arms around your waist for leverage as he flips you over onto your back. He sits up on his knees, trailing his hands down your sides until he reaches the waistband of your panties, trailing his fingers across the lace for a moment.
“You alright?” He asks, checking in with you.
You nod, lifting your feet so they press against his chest. “You gonna take them off already?”
He grins, sliding his fingers under the waistband of your underwear, pulling them down your legs before tossing them to the floor. He parts your thighs to give himself room as he pulls off his own shorts, his cock springing free from the confining fabric. Your mouth waters as you stare at it, your teeth sinking into your lip in anticipation.
“Fuck,” He breathes as he pushes your thighs further apart, dark eyes glued to your glistening folds.
He slides his hands down your thighs, his thumb ghosting over your clit. Your hips jerk in response, pushing up against his hand. He chuckles, repeating the motion, watching the way your lips part in a moan.
“Always so sensitive.” He smirks, pressing his thumb into the bundle of nerves. “Even after Price fucked you senseless a couple nights ago.”
Your face warms at his words, your stomach fluttering excitedly. Of course they had heard you. You’ve long given up on trying to hide what goes on behind their closed doors. They all know, they already knew from the first night you spent with John.
He had been rather rough that night, fucking you into the mattress so hard the headboard had scraped some of the prison grey paint off the walls. You had asked for it, though, both of you needing the raw, carnal release it had given you.
“Yeah, we all heard that.” Kyle continues, slowly circling your clit with his thumb as he speaks. “Sounded like a couple of animals in there. If you hadn’t been screaming his name over and over, we might have been worried he’d mauled you to death. Simon and I had to keep Johnny occupied so he wasn’t tempted to join you.”
Your pussy flutters at the thought of the three of them together, riled up by you and John. You can almost picture it, Johnny in Simon’s lap, bouncing on his cock while Kyle sucks him off from the front. Or did Johnny submit to both and suck Kyle’s cock while Simon took him from behind? Or was Simon more of a giver and sucked him off while Kyle fucked him? Or did Simon take both of them after making them both suck his cock?
The endless stream of thoughts has your pussy clenching, slick dribbling out of you as your legs start to shake. It’s almost too much with the pressure against your clit, your body heating from the fire ignited in your veins.
“Liked that, didn’t you?” Kyle smirks, removing his hand from your clit to lean down over you. “Maybe next time we’ll squeeze you in right in the middle. Would you like that?”
You nearly cum from his words alone, your hands grasping at his shoulders. “Fuck, Kyle! I need you inside me right now.”
“So impatient.” He tsks, leaning forward to bite at your lips. “Such a needy little omega.”
“Please!” You almost sob, lifting your hips to press against his. “I need you.”
He shushes you, pressing a soft kiss against your lips before sitting back up onto his knees. He shifts slightly closer to you, propping your legs up over his thighs. His hand fists his cock, pumping the hard length a couple times before he drags the head through your folds. You whine impatiently, trying to lift your hips to grind against him but he presses a hand into your stomach, pinning you against the bed.
“Patience.” He scolds you, sending a shiver down your spine.
He drags his head through your folds a couple more times before he finally presses into you, stretching you open. You go lax on the bed, relaxing around him as he rocks his hips into you, sinking in deeper with every movement.
You reach for him as he sinks completely into you, pulling him down so he’s hovering over you. He presses his lips to yours, kissing you softly as you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him as close as you can. His arms slip around your back as he begins grinding against you, his thrusts shallow and soft. It’s so very different from how John had taken you just a couple days ago. Kyle has always been softer, gentler, more passionate than rough and eager.
You moan softly against his lips, your legs wrapping around his waist to keep him locked against you. You want to get closer to him, but you’re not sure you can get closer than you already are. Bodies pressed together, his cock inside you, lips pressed to yours as he holds you. There’s a prickling under your skin, an urge to devour him, to keep him here forever. He snaps his hips into you harder, his lips trailing down to your throat, sucking at the sensitive skin. You tilt your head to the side, your eyes widening as a gasp leaves your lips. Your fingers dig into Kyle’s side, his head snapping to the side, sensing the disturbance in the room.
“Don’t stop on my account.” John leans against the closed door, a cigar in his hand.
You’re not sure how long he’s been there, how he got in without either of you noticing. Kyle especially, since he was usually so in tune with his surroundings. Pride flashes through you at the thought of him being so lost in you, he can’t focus on anything else. The scent of tobacco washes over you as John takes a long drag from his cigar. He must not have been there long, or maybe you’ve just been so caught up in Kyle’s scent you hadn’t noticed.
Kyle is frozen above you as John pushes off the door, approaching the bed slowly. Kyle shifts above you so he can hold John’s gaze as he stops at the edge of the bed. Excitement swirls in your stomach as you stare up at him in anticipation of what he’s going to do. His hand lifts, dragging down Kyle’s back to his ass.
John delivers a harsh slap to his cheek, Kyle’s hips snapping into yours in response as a moan leaves his lips. “Did I tell you to stop, soldier?”
“No, sir.” Kyle grunts out, starting to rock his hips into yours again.
You watch the change happen almost immediately, the natural shift between them. Kyle’s not in charge anymore, quickly handing over control to John despite the fact he’s the one inside of you. It’s a subtle submission, yet you can sense the changes in them both.
John massages Kyle’s ass for a moment before shifting so he’s closer to you. You stare up at him, lips parted as you whimper quietly. “There’s my pretty girl.” He praises you as he leans down, brushing his thumb over your lips before pushing it into your mouth. You close your lips around his thumb, sucking on it. “Such a good girl, isn’t she?”
“Yes, sir.” Kyle grunts, continuing to thrust into you harder than he had been before.
John takes another drag from his cigar as you moan around his thumb, your hands gripping the sheets as Kyle continues to thrust into you, the head of his cock dragging across that spot inside you from the angle he’s at. Moans slip from Kyle’s lips as you clench around him, his own hands digging into the sheets. Sweat has beaded across his forehead, a droplet sliding down his cheek to his neck, leaving a trail as it slowly drips down his chest. Drool slips out of your mouth around John’s thumb. You want to lick the sweat from his chest. You want to taste him.
John slips his thumb from your lips, dragging it across your chin, smearing saliva all over your skin. “Look at her.” He says, moving so he’s looking over Kyle’s shoulder. “Drooling already and you haven’t even made her cum yet, have you?” His hand slips around the back of Kyle’s neck, his fingers digging into the sensitive skin. “You gonna make her cum like a good boy?”
Kyle lets out a moan, his pace stuttering just slightly. “Yes, sir.” He grits out, picking up the pace as he slams into that spot inside you with every movement.
John takes a step back, continuing to smoke as he watches the two of you. It’s almost too much between Kyle fucking you and John watching. There’s a coil tightening in your stomach, the pleasure intensifying more and more. A fire has started under your skin, your eyes glued to John’s as Kyle pushes you closer and closer to the peak.
You hold John’s gaze as you cum, your back arching in pleasure. Kyle doesn’t stop, continuing to thrust into you as he chases his own high.
John waits until your moans have died down before he moves, stubbing out his cigar on Kyle’s nightstand before he grasps Kyle by the hips, stopping his movements. “Switch places with our girl.” He murmurs into Kyle’s ear, Kyle taking a second to breathe before he wraps his arms around you, flipping you back around so you’re on top again as John kicks off his shoes.
Your hands press into Kyle’s stomach to hold yourself steady, your legs still shaking from your orgasm. John climbs on the bed behind you, his clothed chest pressing against your bare, sweat slicked back.
“Gonna be a good girl and make him cum?” John says quietly, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.
A shiver runs down your spine as you nod, starting to rock your hips just slightly. John’s hands settle on your waist, helping you move as you begin to bounce on Kyle’s cock. Kyle’s eyes are wide as he watches you and his alpha, John pressing kisses across your shoulders and neck as he helps you fuck his beta. Kyle’s hands grip your thighs, fingers indenting the skin as he holds on for dear life.
“That’s it.” John praises you, shifting your body forward just slightly so Kyle’s cock drags across that spot inside you with your every movement. You clench around him, your thighs tightening around his hips.
“Fuck...” Kyle moans, his own hips bucking up into yours.
“Gonna make him cum?” John asks, his hands abandoning your hips. One snakes around your stomach to rub your clit while the other slips behind you to squeeze Kyle's balls.
Kyle lets out a loud moan, his hips snapping up against yours as your walls clamp tightly around him. You can feel the warm ropes of his release spurting inside you, increasing the pressure as you cum a second time on his cock.
John works you both through your orgasms, your entire body shaking by the time he releases you, pushing you forward against Kyle's chest. You lay there, your cheek pressed against his sweaty skin, ass in the air right in John's face. He watches as Kyle's seed begins to seep out of you, forced out by the aftershocks of your orgasm. He drags his fingers through your folds, gathering Kyle's cum before pushing it back into you. You moan softly from the stretch of his fingers against your sensitive walls, pushing your hips back against his hand.
“Don't want to waste any of that.” John says, nipping at the globe of your ass cheek. “You know Kyle likes to clean you up himself.”
You let out a quiet moan, your pussy fluttering around John’s fingers. You’re about to be in for a very long night.
NEXT ->
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I've always been yours // Eddie Munson
Prompt: "I think... I'm in love with him.” "Congrats on being the last one to find out" + the 5 ways to say I love you without saying I love you.
wc: 14K (I'm learning what brevity means y'all)
warnings: female reader, some implied sexual stuff towards the end but not really ish, friends-to-lovers, oblivious idiots in love, the beginnings of rockstar eddie.
Masterlist || AO3
1. Covering sharp edges with their hands, so you don’t get hurt.
You were going to get Max’s birthday cake absolutely perfect even if it fucking killed you, you thought to yourself as your arm ached the harder you mixed the batter.
“Are you sure you don’t need any help Nov?” Eddie asked again.
Pushing the hair out of your eyes with the back of your wrist, you huffed. “I’m okay. I think I adjusted the recipe perfectly this time. I just need to make sure there’s no lumps or the chocolate won’t-”
“I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU WHEELER!” You heard Dustin yell from the basement.
Eddie snorted. “Ten bucks on Mike,” he said from his place on the counter.
“I’m telling Dustin you said that,” you said, turning from your batter and shooting him a playful look over your shoulder.
He clasped his imaginary pearls dramatically. “Fair maiden, you dare betray our sacred friendship?”
Not able to keep your laugh down, you shook your head. Loud stomping alerted you to the shift of location of whatever fight was happening.
“Do not come into the kitchen with your shit!” You shouted.
Dustin’s voice floated in from the living room. “But Mike-”
“But Mike nothing!” You shouted. “You two shitheads work it out!”
“I didn’t do it on purpose!” Mike shouted, grunting right after. “Ow! Dustin!”
Eddie immediately huffed out laughter. “I’d listen to her, she’s on her fifth batch. Her face is getting whiter and whiter with each cake.”
Your hand flew up to your face, fingers coming back dusted in flour. Turning your glare to his grinning face, you rolled your eyes. “You couldn’t have told me?”
“And ruin how cute you look with all that flour on your face?” Eddie said, nonchalantly going back to the book in his hands. Doing your best to ignore the flustered expression you knew was growing on your face, you turned back to the batter. Eddie always managed to draw out reactions from you, you were sure that was the main reason why he kept doing it.
I like unnerving you he’d said. Asshole, you thought fondly, glancing at him. A good chunk of flour dusted down towards your hands at the motion. Christ, how much flour was on your face?
“I’m going to slap you the second I put this into a pan,” you threatened, trying to get it all off.
Eddie’s grin morphed into something more. “Promises, promises,” he winked.
And there went the butterflies in your stomach.
You opened your mouth to say something else when a blur of curly hair, black shirts, and a flying white shoe flung the kitchen door open.
“Guys,” Eddie warned, placing his book down.
“For fuck’s sake, what’s wrong now?” You said, putting the bowl down onto the kitchen island and stepping towards them with your hands on your hips.
Dustin was the quickest to speak up. “He borrowed the comic that I just managed to get and got it wet!”
“It wasn’t on purpose!” Mike shouted back. “I swear, Holly was eating at the table and spilled her soda!”
“Likely story!” Dustin snapped, eyes narrowing. “You’re doing it because I accidentally broke your figurines last week. I didn’t want to hit that pothole and go flying!”
“For the love of- it wasn’t on purpose!”
Dustin’s arms swung out and Mike darted left to avoid being hit. Before they could even crash together, you knew exactly what was going to happen.
As if in slow motion, you watched as Dustin shoved Mike’s arm into the mixing bowl. Without much prompting, your perfect batter, went tumbling off the island and flew with a vengeance in a million different directions. The opened bag of flour next to it, toppled right after it.
The silence as the bowl wobbled to a stop was painful. You blinked, shocked for a few seconds and nodded dumbly.
Well, that hurt more than the demobats clawing at your neck in the Upside Down.
“I’m going to rip your spines out and play jump rope with it,” you said calmly, eye twitching, at Mike and Dustin. The flour was splattered everywhere, including your new vans and the crevices no one was ever able to clean in the cracks of the linoleum.
The two idiots shuffled closer to the door. At least they had the decency to look somewhat mortified. Before you could go through with your threat, Eddie’s hands came down to their necks and they both winced.
“Dudes, not cool,” he said, voice uncharacteristically serious. “She said don’t come into the kitchen for a reason. Now she’s gotta wait until you two assholes clean this all up before starting again.”
“Wha-” “But!”
Their protests quickly died down when he smacked them in the back of their heads.
“You break it, you fix it,” he said.
Hiding a smile, you rounded the island towards the rag by the sink and sighed. “Try to hurry, I want to get this decorated before midnight,” you said to the two apologetic teens who were already moving towards the mess.
Pushing the door out into the dining room you tried your best not to trek batter anywhere. Swiping the rag down your face and hair to get rid of any remaining flour you leaned down to help save your vans.
A sudden hand flying out towards your face made you flinch back. Falling onto your butt, you groaned as your hip smacked into the leg of the table.
Eddie shook his head, a soft expression on his face. Your eyes trailed down to where his hand was curled around the corner of the dining table. “Did I almost go face first into that?” You asked from where you were sprawled.
“Yeah, Nova, you almost cracked your skull,” he said, huffing a laugh. “I’d tell you to be more careful but it’d be a waste of breath.” Eddie tugged the rag out your hand and sat down by your feet.
“I-I am insulted.” The indignation cancelled out by the stammering. Eddie had picked up one of your, now dirty, sneakers and plopped it into his lap. He went about meticulously cleaning the chocolate off. “I can do that. You don’t have to-”
His brown eyes darted up to yours, silencing you. “I know I don’t have to; I want to.”
Mildly surprised, and a little flustered by his earnest tone, you nodded dumbly. By the time he was done, there was a pink tinge to his cheeks that you found stupidly endearing.
“There you go fair maiden. Good as new.” He bowed, dropping the rag onto the table. He offered his hand and pulled you up with a firm grip.
Warmth bloomed in your chest at the sight of his wide smile and soft gaze. “Thanks Eddie,” you said, smiling up at him.
He tossed an arm around your shoulders and pulled you towards the kitchen. “Come on, let’s go give them a little more hell,” he whispered, his breath tickling your ear.
Not one to resist, you beamed up at him and nodded. “Dibs on Mike,” you said, laughing when he did.
2. Covering you with a blanket when you look cold.
You met Eddie when you were in middle school but, you hadn’t really become friends until freshman year of high school. You were a cheerleader, one of the few freshmen on the team, and you’d caught Tommy Hagan cornering Eddie in a hallway.
You hadn’t hesitated at the sight of the stupid bully and had thrown your pompoms at his head. With a promise of a Herkie to the face, Tommy and his entourage had left you alone.
“Are you okay?” You asked him, bending over to pick up your tossed pompoms.
Eddie, however, hadn’t looked like he was two seconds away from being shoved into a locker. He was beaming. At you.
“What?” You asked, looking around at the empty hallway. “Do I have something on my face?”
“No, I just…didn’t ever think that my knight in shining armor would be a cheerleader,” he said, tone teasing.
Biting back a smile, you crossed your arms. “Why? Because we’re vapid and only care about our hair?” You cocked your hip.
“No,” Eddie said, straightening, “I swear, that’s not what I-”
Not able to help it, you burst out into laughter. “I’m fucking with you,” you said, hiding your laugh behind your hand. “I know Tommy’s little sister and she basically rules his household. He knows not to mess with her.”
Eddie smiled and you’d realized that he had a really nice smile. With a flourish, he bowed. “Well, I’m in your debt knight.”
Scrunching your nose, you shook your head. “Not a fan of the nickname?” He asked, starting towards the exit doors. Walking backwards, he drifted closer to you. “What about Nova?”
“What?” You laughed, surprised. “How’d you go from Knight to Nova?”
“Well, you’re my knight in shining armor – what’s brighter than a supernova?”
Throwing your head back, your laugh echoed down the hallway. You’d quickly become friends.
“Novaaaa, come on,” Eddie groaned, flopping down onto the sofa, “just pick a movie.” Clearly, almost a decade later, the nickname had stuck.
“Don’t rush me!” You told him, eyeing the three tapes in front of you. “Which one do you want to watch?”
Eddie’s head lolled back around to you and he smiled. “It’s your turn to pick,” he reminded you.
“I know, but-”
“Just put on Grease,” Eddie said, voice muffled by the pillow. You were about to protest, what an absolutely rude assumption, when a knock echoed from Eddie’s front door. “Pizza’s here. Pick a movie!”
Sighing, knowing that he’d had a bad week, you pushed Indiana Jones into the VCR. The smell of hot pizza wafted over to you and your stomach immediately roared – reminding you that you hadn’t had enough time to eat before your shift.
“Alright, alright, I heard you,” Eddie said, motioning to your stomach. He brought the box over, handing you some water and frowned at the television. “What’s this?”
“Indianamph Jonesah,” you said, around a mouthful of steaming pizza. You were going to miss your tastebuds but goddamn if it wasn’t a great mouthful.
Eddie rolled his eyes, pulled the tape out and shoved Grease in. Dodging your flailing arm, he dropped to the floor by the coffee table, his shoulder brushing your knee.
The opening music started and you found your eyes drawn to the screen. “What the hell?”
“I got that because I know you like to watch one of the same five movies after a long shift,” he said, picking up his own slice.
“But-”
He bumped your leg with his shoulder. “It was your turn to pick, I promise – I don’t mind. Besides, it’s starting to grow on me. It’s definitely better than Overboard.”
“Hey, that’s a good movie!”
Eddie rolled his eyes. “Right, and I’m Ozzy Osbourne.”
“Well,” you said with a smile growing, “you had the chance to bite off a bat’s head but you wasted that opportunity.”
Choking on his mouthful of pizza, Eddie laughed and shot you a soft look. “I’m glad my brush with death is something you can laugh about now.”
“Yeah, well, it’s been almost a year. Thought it was about time we all started joking about almost dying,” you said, “besides, Max started it.”
“I’ve never met another person with such morbid humor,” Eddie said, eyes following Danny and Sandy as they kissed on the beach. A flash of something shot through you but you ignored it.
You shrugged despite the fact that you knew he couldn’t see it. “I’m kinda proud of her for having it,” you said, bopping your head to the music you knew by heart.
I solve my problems and I see the light
We gotta loving thing, we gotta feed it right
Eddie turned to you suddenly, his eyes shifting. “Yeah, I’m proud of all of us.”
You grinned at him, dropping your plate onto the table and getting comfortable on Eddie’s couch. It was one of his better purchases – Wayne had chosen to accept the new trailer the state had bought him while Eddie had moved into a small one bedroom downtown. It made more sese considering it was close to the music store you both worked at.
“I’m not pausing the movie if you knock out,” he warned as you fluffed the pillow behind your head.
“I’m not going to fall asleep, when am I ever the one who knocks out first?”
Eddie shot you a look. “Did you want me to bring out a list or?”
Smacking the back of his head, he ducked and laughed when you half missed your target. “Alright, alright, I’m missing the good stuff.”
“I knew you liked this movie,” you said, nudging him with your knee. Eddie shot you a withering glare, or he tried to, because you laughed at his attempt. Amused, his eyes drifted to over your head and you were about to turn when something dropped into your lap.
Eddie pulled the crocheted blanket over your legs and let it pool around your waist. The black and white blanket had been gifted to Eddie by Robin. She’d decided she was going to learn to crochet last year and spent the entire months leading up to Christmas lost in her projects. Your green scarf was hanging with your jacket by the door. You loved this blanket and you knew Eddie did too – it was always draped across the sofa for easy access.
“My place gets cold at night,” he said at your questioning look, “you know that. Besides, you’ll make it an hour before knocking out.”
The sweet gesture was overshadowed by his smug look and your hand jutted out to hit any part of him you could reach. “I’m not going to fall asleep.”
Both of you went back and forth, poking fun, and as you watched Danny ignore Sandy for Cha-Cha, you heard Eddie snort.
“What?” You asked, tapping your fingers along to the beat.
“I just always thought it was funny how he leaves her behind, he just goes with it,” he said.
You pointed to the cameras. “They’re on live television,” you explained sleepily.
“So?” Eddie raised his brow. “Are you defending him?”
“Of course not!” Why was this couch so comfortable? The blanket moved around you, warm hands tucking it over your shoulders and sighing when you snuggled into it.
Eddie’s knowing smile went a little fuzzy around the edges as your eyes felt harder and harder to keep open. Before you could formulate a comeback, the exhaustion of the day pulled you under. As you were entirely lost to the world, you heard Eddie murmur, “I would never leave you behind.”
3. Holding your hand when you’re falling apart.
Four years of cheerleading practice had not prepared you for what it truly meant to run for your life. Not really.
It stood to reason that you’d really never had to run from an interdimensional monster before – up until your employment at The Gap. Honestly, it was The Gap’s fault.
You’d met Robin at the first Hawkins Middle School band practice as small seventh graders. Her mom had told her she needed to get a job for the summer and she’d dragged you along with her. She had gotten hired at Scoops Ahoy and, in your defense, who was going to say no to a daily free ice cream? So, if you really thought about it – it was Scoop’s fault. And Robin’s.
The moment you saw Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington behind the counter, you should’ve turned the other way. But no, Robin was absolutely sure he’d changed. You snorted. Sure, he’d changed. Having all your friends drop you towards the end of your senior year would humble anyone. You’d been close enough to the source when the downfall of The Hair happened. It hadn’t been pretty. Especially after Nancy Wheeler decided to stick by Jonathan.
While he hadn’t been one of the few who liked to remind you of your low spot on the totem pole, he definitely wasn’t Mother Theresa. You’d seen how his friends treated Eddie’s friends – people who they deemed outcasts. Eddie had only been mostly spared because you two were practically fused at the hip. Besides, he knew that Nancy liked you – the two of you had hung out before considering you’d both been close friends with Barb. While you and her weren’t best friends, you knew he didn’t want to mess with anyone Nancy liked. Which, really, made him a selfish, self-centered asshole. And anyway, you’d seen what he’d spray painted onto the theater header.
It wasn’t until you saw him with Dustin, one of your favorite neighbors, that you’d conceded. How could someone who clearly held a middle schooler up to such high standards be that bad? Besides, Dustin was a kid – but you trusted him. Robin, of course, still held that against you to this day.
To be fair, Steve himself hadn’t won you over until he’d taken hit after hit to keep you and Robin as safe as possible. Russians in a secret lab under Starcourt injecting you with truth serum was not something you’d had on your 1985 bingo card.
You still remembered how Steve had grabbed each of your wrists so tightly that it’d taken weeks for the bruises to fade. He’d practically tossed you both under a massive table when the Mind Flayer had landed mid-food court. Robin clutched at your shoulders, Steve a steadying presence behind you.
He’d waited, for hours, as the EMTs cleared all of you outside the burning mall. And while you’d hoped that this was the last time any of your friends, new or old, had tried to save you – clearly that had been wishful thinking.
The muscles in your arms burned as you hauled yourself through the gate. Breath knocked out of you as you landed on your back, you glanced up to see Eddie’s hands stilling on the makeshift rope.
“Come on!” Dustin screamed. “Eddie come on!”
A flash of something crossed his expression and you knew. You knew he was going to do something stupid.
“Eddie!” You screamed, voice cracking in your desperation. His wide eyes struck yours and you knew the moment he’d decided. “Don’t you fucking dare! Edward Munson, you listen to me right now. Climb this fucking rope.”
“I’m sorry Nov,” he said, staring up at you with a sad smile. Without thinking, you scrambled to throw yourself down the gate but the rope dropped by your feet, cut from the source. “I love you. Take care of Dustin,” he said, eyes sincere and apologetic.
“Eddie!” You both screamed, voices hoarse.
Panic clawed at your chest. You couldn’t breathe – he was…he was going to get himself fucking killed. Spurring into action, Dustin pushed you aside as he grunted from the effort of pushing the dining table towards the middle of the room. “Come on! Those things will kill him, we gotta get back!”
Not one to be told twice, you shoved a few pieces of furniture on top of the table for good measure. You climbed up to the gate, barely able to touch the edges. Adrenaline rushed through you as you looked down to Dustin. “Give me a boost, I can almost reach it!”
Without hesitating, Dustin kneeled, hands on your calves and you used his knee to hoist yourself up. You didn’t have much time to adjust yourself but you channeled every tumbling move you’d ever done and tried to tuck and roll. Mostly successful, you only winced as your shoulder collided painfully with the metal chair.
“Okay, I’ll be right back!”
“You can’t just fucking leave me here!” Dustin shouted. You pointed up at him with all the authority you could muster.
“Try to tie more sheets together, the others will need help climbing through when they come back,” you glared at him, “don’t do anything stupid Henderson.”
Not waiting for a response, you kicked the trailer door open and scanned the field. A tornado of bats and a loud, heartbreaking, scream cut through you.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, you fucking idiot,” you said, panicking as you ran. You watched as the bats took turns diving for him, his spear barely keeping them back.
“Come on!” He screamed into the eye of the storm. Because of course he did. The idiot. You willed your legs to run faster, to just get you there so you could help. Then, they struck. Eddie’s hands whipped up to his throat and you watched him slam into the floor.
“Eddie!” You screamed, throat raw, but it was drowned out by the screeching bats. A flash of Billy being impaled, lifted into the air, and thrown like a ragdoll bubbled up to your consciousness. No, please, you begged, not Eddie, not him.
Slowing as you neared, you pulled the gun from around your shoulders and squared them like Hopper had taught you. The shots echoed despite the chaos, your blood rushing through your body. “Get away from him!” You shrieked, fighting your way through the opening you’d created.
You slipped on the unmoving body of the ones you’d shot down and slid directly into an motionless Eddie. Covering his body with your own, you raised your gun as they swooped down. Almost out of bullets, you’d just hit another when one managed to swipe you from the side – claws digging into your skin. Screaming, you waved the gun like Steve’s bat and swatted as many as you could out the air.
Shit, you couldn’t keep this up. There were too many.
Then, as if puppets that were cut, they all dropped to the floor. One slammed into your bad shoulder painfully and you cried out.
“Nov?”
The weak voice was like beacon and you quickly slid to the ground. You weren’t going to question your good luck. Pulling the leather jacket off his chest your heart dropped down next to the dead demobats and you immediately started to cry.
“That bad huh?” He joked, voice wet as blood poured out his mouth.
“You absolute fucking asshole. You dickhead,” you berated him as you tied your own cargo jacket around the gash in his stomach. Rising to your knees, you quickly pulled your belt off your waist and made a tourniquet around his upper thigh. Your hands were drenched in blood and you forced the bile down. Focus, you need to stop the bleeding. You needed to get him back to the trailer, you yelled at yourself.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Eddie’s weak hand came up to your forearm and your heart creaked as the cracks deepened. “It’ll be okay.”
“No it won’t you fucking moron, you’re my best friend – I – can’t watch you die. I won’t,” you said, hauling him onto your lap. You tried to stand but your shoulder immediately gave and you both crashed to the ground.
A sob wrenched it’s way out your throat, helpless and willing your shoulder to work. Just this time, please, please, you begged.
“Nova,” Eddie’s voice trailed off, weaker than before.
Cradling his stupid face, your hands left streaks of blood on his pale skin. Shaking, your fingers caressed his jaw. The brown eyes, more familiar to you than your own, slowly started to fade.
“Eddie, stay with me, someone’s coming okay – it’s going to be okay,” you said, entire body clinging to his.
“I-I told you this was my year,” he said, blood tricking down. His unseeing eyes searched for you, like they always did, and you realized that you wouldn’t survive this. Eddie was going to fade from existence, the entire town thinking him a murderer, and this would finally be the storm that broke you.
“I can’t live without you,” you stammered, words bubbling up in rapid succession, you had things you needed to say – stuff you needed to do with him still. You were supposed to have time – it wasn’t supposed to end this way. Jaw aching as you bit down your anguish, you pressed a kiss to his forehead and he sighed. “Eddie, please,” you begged, unashamed and desperate.
Take me, you begged the dark skies that mocked you, anyone but him.
“I l-love-” he gagged, choking on his own blood and you pressed your forehead against his.
“Sh, sh, it’s okay, I’m here Eddie. I’m here. I know. Me too,” you said, tongue sticking to the roof of your mouth. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
Sorry you weren’t fast enough, sorry you couldn’t save him, sorry for having to be the one to watch him die. Eddie’s hand came up to your wrist, squeezing once before dropping limp.
The silence around you was deafening. No, no, no, no.
You screamed, anguished, and the pain unbearable. Anger coursed through you, mixing with your overwhelming grief. It crashed into you from all angles, its hands grabbing onto you and pulling you under. Your throat hurt but you couldn’t stop screaming, all of you couldn’t stop screaming in the unfairness of it all.
“Eddie?” A voice shouted through the darkness. You whipped your head up, searching through the night for the voice.
“Steve?” You called out tentatively, hand reaching for your discarded gun. Was this a trick? You scanned your surroundings, vision blurry. No, you steeled yourself, this place had already taken everything from you – they couldn’t have his body too.
Swinging the gun towards the quick footsteps, you ignored your trembling arms.
“Hey, hey! Wait, it’s me,” Steve said, hands up. He stepped in front of Robin, his eyes on the still body behind you.
Eyes wild, you blinked away your constant tears, and loosened the hold on your gun. “Stevie?”
“It’s me, it’s me – I promise,” he said, hand coming out to take your shotgun. Handing it to Nancy, he pulled you into his arms. “What happened?” He winced when he saw your skin bleeding sluggishly.
“Eddie?” Robin whispered, dropping to her knees beside him.
Willing yourself to keep it together you nodded towards the house. “What happened?”
“He’s dead, we got him – Nance got him. It’s over.”
Feeling weak, you leaned on Nancy’s outstretched arm and watched as Steve dropped to examine him.
“He’s – he – cut the rope – I tried, my shoulder – it, oh God,” you said, scrambling towards the nearest wall and throwing up everything in your stomach. A warm hand came up to your back, rubbing it back and forth until your heaving stopped.
“I got you,” Nancy said, “I’m here, it’s okay. I’m here for you.”
He was dead. Eddie was gone. Nothing would ever be okay again.Your blood-soaked hands reached out and she clasped them. Eyes on yours, strong and steady, she nodded. “You’re okay. I’ve got you.”
“Nance,” your voice sounded warped. “I tried.”
She shushed you, bringing your arm over her shoulders and taking most of your weight as you crumbled. You watched as Robin and Steve grabbed him, moving quickly towards the trailer.
“What? Where are you going?” Nancy shouted.
Robin grunted under the weight as she climbed the steps. “He’s got a pulse! The tourniquets are holding! We gotta move fast!”
.
Coincidentally, the nearest hospital to Forest Park was at the town line one over. Robin had assured you that since it wasn’t Hawkins, they weren’t likely to recognize him instantly. Worry for Max joined your overwhelming weight as you glanced at the destruction the earthquake had wreaked. “Do you think he got her?” You asked, voice barely audible.
“I killed him as the clock was chiming,” Nancy said, “it only rang three times. I’ll call when we get to the hospital – they’ll be okay. We’re all okay. We have to be.”
After admitting Eddie, a concerned nurse offered you a pair of scrubs to change into. Glancing down at your clothes, you realized you were covered in blood. Eddie’s blood.
Tearing up, her eyes had softened incredibly and she helped you wash it off. “It’ll all work out honey, you’ll see,” she whispered as the blood dribbled down the drain. You’d barely felt the needle as she stitched the claw marks on your chest and neck.
It’d taken an hour of arguing but you promised the others you could keep it together for the night as they drove back to Hawkins to figure out what was going on. Robin had kissed the top of your now clean hair, and clasped her hands with yours. “I will be back as soon as I can, okay? As fast as I can.” The fierceness in her tone had your eyes tearing up again and she hugged you tightly.
Five hours after being admitted, with no news, you received the second shock of the night.
“Hopper?” You sputtered, almost bowled over to see the ghost of your old Chief of police.
Head shaved, a few pounds lighter, but the smile that came from hearing your voice was just the same. “Hey kid,” he said, bringing you into a tight hug.
It took another hour, and the arrival of just about everyone you knew, for a nurse to let you know that Eddie had stabilized. They’d needed to operate to stop the internal bleeding, he’d needed a few blood transfusions and was placed into a medically induced coma, but he’d be alright.
“He’s…he’ll be okay?” You asked, not willing to cling onto any false hope.
The nurse from earlier stepped forward, her kind eyes wrinkled as she smiled. “Yeah, honey, he’ll be okay.”
Swallowing back your tears, you pulled her into a hug. “Thank you.”
Two hours later, while you sat glued to his side, Hopper let you know that Eddie was cleared of all charges.
“Do you want to know?” He asked.
Shaking your head, you smiled up at him for the first time in the last twelve hours. The sun peaked out from the horizon, drenching Eddie’s dark room in a warm orange light. “I don’t care how. Just – thank you.”
Hopper ruffled your hair and you leaned into his touch like cat arching for more affection. “They’ll want your statement but not until a few days from now. As far as you know, you were over Robin’s with Steve for the entire night. Her neighbor, Mrs. Matthews has already said she could corroborate your alibi.”
Smiling, you nodded. “I don’t even want to know what the U.S. government had on her.”
“You don’t,” he agreed.
It took Eddie another day to wake up. Wayne had finally convinced you to go get something to eat, I won’t leave his side sweetheart, I promise.
You balanced the two coffees in your hand as you pushed open the door to Eddie’s room. Surprised to see the entire party surrounded by the bed, you blinked, a little taken aback.
Dustin was the first to catch your eye, his grin so wide it almost split his face in two. “Eddie’s awake!” Your eyes darted to the bed, the man in it grinning up at a tearful Wayne.
“You absolute asshole,” you hissed, not able to keep it down.
The party laughed, Steve shaking his head. “Hi Nova,” Eddie said, voice hoarse, and you felt your stomach swoop as those eyes met yours. “I’m sorry.”
“You better be,” you said, handing Wayne his coffee. He promised to be back, wanting to speak to the doctor. The moment the door closed; chaos reigned. Everyone talked over each other and you watched, amused. Sipping your coffee, you smacked Lucas’ shoulder as he made fun of something Mike said.
Steve’s whistle was loud enough to pierce several eardrums and you winced. “One at time! The man just woke up from a coma.”
“Medically induced coma,” Mike clarified.
You fought the urge to smack him too.
Despite the severity of what brought Eddie to the hospital, after a week – he was given the all clear. The party was at Eddie’s new trailer, decorating the larger space for his homecoming. You’d been tasked to watch over the patient. You’d arrived early, still not entirely able to have him out of your sights for too long. As you popped your head in, you realized he was asleep.
Dropping into the comfortable chair next to his bed, you set yourself up for waiting. In the past week and a half, you hadn’t managed to find a moment alone with Eddie. There was always a party member at his bedside at all times. Or a band member. Or a parent.
Eddie’s room had quickly become well known for the noise and chattering that spilled out into the hallways. At its absence, you realized you didn’t know what to do.
Smacking his lips, Eddie’s head moved towards the door, eyes still closed. As he shifted, you caught sight of the large bandage by his neck. The purple bruising on his arms looked painful and your chest clenched at the sight of them.
It seemed that before you could decide for yourself, the silence swallowed you whole. Bringing you hand up to your lips, you tried to silence your sobs. Chest heaving with the effort, you buried your face into your hands and cried. The last week of pushing everything down and resolving to deal with it later had finally caught up to you.
Everyone has their reckoning, you were reminded. This was yours.
A warm hand came up to your shoulder, the bandaged one, and softly caressed where the tape adhered to your skin. “Hey you,” he said, sleep clinging to the corner of his knowing gaze.
“I’m sorry,” you sputtered, trying to push it back down but there was no use. Pandora’s box had been opened. Turning from him, you caught sight of his frown. His pained grunt made you whip back to him and you almost tripped over your own feet as you rushed to help. Eddie’s expression was twisted as he sat up, sweat beading at his temples.
“Lie down, you psychopath,” you said once the lump in your throat let you speak. “The bed will move for you! You just had surgery on your side for fuck’s sake.” You ducked your head, trying to avoid his eyes as you adjusted the bed to his liking.
Stubborn as always, Eddie tapped your forearm. “Don’t hide from me, not you,” he said softly, his eyes searching for yours. Giving in, you let your blurry sight find his and he sighed. “Nova, you should’ve told me.”
“Told you what?” You said through desperate inhales.
“That you’d been bottling it up – come here,” he said. You wished you could climb into the bed with him but you couldn’t, his incision still very off limits to movement. You were trying to decide where to touch, when he decided for you. His right hand opened, fingers wiggling towards you. “Come on.”
Interlocking your fingers with his, relishing in the touch, you pressed the back of his hand to your cheek. His pulse beat against yours, alive – wondrously and beautifully alive. This, this was what you needed. A moment to lose it before rearranging the bricks of your mental foundation back in place. The image of him, eyes unseeing, bubbled to the surface and despair twisted it’s venomous grip around your lungs.
Choking, you let the sob come out unbidden. Not sure you could stop it if you wanted to, you let the tears drown you. Weeping, you whimpered as you accepted what could’ve been. What you would’ve had to watch. The fact that you would’ve had something so important ripped from your grasp.
He's okay, you thought, he’s alive.
“I’m here,” he said, his voice a quiet echo of Nancy’s lost words. “I’m here. I got you.” After a few minutes, your chest stopped heaving and you could take a deep breath.
“I’m sorry,” you told him, a little embarrassed. “Thank you.”
“No, I’m sorry,” he said, pulling your hand from your face and towards his own. He pressed a kiss to your knuckles and you blinked at him.
“Why are you sorry?” Christ, you were a mess. He’d been in a coma for two days and he was comforting you. He’d almost died and you were too weak to be strong for your friend.
“I’m sorry for leaving you,” he said, “I’m sorry that you had to be the one I left behind. I’m sorry for scaring you. I’m sorry that you had to see me like that. I’m sorry for hurting you even if I’d do it again if it meant you were safe. It was scary and I’m sorry for doing that to you, no matter how important it was that I did it.”
His thumb caressed your hand and you bit back the tears that wanted to wail out to the world that you’d almost lost something that couldn’t be replaced. But the silence that fell was comforting, a soft and easy kind. One that didn’t need to be filled and his pulse was a balm soothing your raw panic.
And yet -
“Don’t leave me here alone. It’s your Sam calling,” you said, eyes on his. A small real, smile broke out on his face and he squeezed your hand.
Despite the bandages across his jaw, and the wince of pain as he shifted, you hadn’t seen someone look so beautiful.
“Don’t go where I can’t follow, wake up Mr. Frodo,” Eddie whispered and you beamed at him.
4. Telling you to call them so they know you got home safe.
“For fuck’s sake,” you hissed, rubbing your temples as you watched Robin hop on top of a bar table to dance.
Eddie’s laughter hit your ear and you shivered at the warmth. “Come on Nov, she looks like she’s having fun,” he said, chest pressed against your back. Tucking his chin over your shoulder, you finally waved down the bartender.
“Can I have another club soda please?” You asked, handing her the money. She nodded, eyes drifting to Eddie and smiling.
“You two are a really cute couple,” she said, sliding the glass towards you.
Opening your mouth to correct her, Eddie beat you to it. “Thank you!” At your glance, he shrugged. “It’s easier to go along with.”
Something in your chest tightened at the thought but you shrugged. “Jesus, Eddie, can you bring her down? She’s going to end up falling and cracking her neck.”
Eddie sighed, his warm hand coming up to squeeze your waist. “We really need to stop promising to be the babysitters,” he said, lips brushing against your temple before leaving to drag a protesting Robin off the sticky table.
“Hey,” a guy to your left said, his hair long and pin straight.
You turned to him, not wanting to be rude but also not wanting to make it look like you were welcoming any type of flirting. Eddie already had to shove a creep with a persistent attitude off of Nancy. “Hi,” you said, taking a sip of your drink.
“Sorry to bother you,” he said, a little too quiet for the noise level inside, “but is that the lead singer of Corroded Coffin?”
Relief flooded through you and your shoulders dropped. “Yeah, that’s him.”
“Holy shit, I saw his band last month when he was the opening act for Riot Act. I’m a big fan! They’ve got a great sound,” he said awed. “Sorry! I’m Jack.”
“Hey, I’m-”
“-here with someone,” Eddie’s voice floated over your shoulder and towards the straightening man on the stool.
A little surprised by Eddie’s furrowed expression, and practically thrown by the small ember of something in your spine at his serious tone, you placed a hand on his and smiled up at him. “This is Jack, he’s a fan of Corroded Coffin’s.”
Eddie’s expression completely transformed, a wide smile overtaking the sharp look in his eyes. “Oh man, thanks! Sorry, you know how these bars can get.”
“Yeah,” Jack said, brightening, “totally! Are you guys going to be playing somewhere else soon? I heard a few people say you might be going to Sold Out in Indianapolis!”
Eddie rubbed the back of his neck and you could tell he was flustered by the pink tinge to his neck. “We are! We’re going to be there for a few weekends for the next couple months. We start sometime in the summer. Still ironing out a few details.”
“That’s great! I’m sorry for asking but, do you mind signing something for me?” Jack asked, excitement growing his eyes.
Both of you thrown, you felt your own giddiness build in your chest. “He’d love to,” you answered for a stunned Eddie. “In fact, the entire band is here tonight. You’ll have to excuse everyone else – we’re the designated drivers. They might be a little drunk.”
At the promise of more autographs, Jack straightened. “Holy shit, yeah that’d be amazing. Thank you so much,” he stammered, grabbing a clear napkin from behind the bar and pulling a pen from his coat. “My friends are going to shit themselves.”
You squeezed Eddie’s hand when you saw it trembling as he signed with a flourish. Shooting you a grateful look, he walked Jack over to where Jeff and Gareth were chanting chug, chug, chug! at a teetering Liam.
Jesus, you sighed, rolling your eyes when Jeff’s excited hand swatted too close to Liam and he started coughing up the beer.
Turning back to your drink, you didn’t wait long before you felt Eddie’s palm at your lower back. “Well, that happened.”
Not missing a beat, you turned with a crumpled napkin and wide eyes. “Oh my God, sir, would you autograph my napkin too?”
Eddie laughed, shaking his head, and he shoved your shoulder. “Shut up,” he grumbled, motioning to the bartender for his own club soda. “You brat.”
Grinning, you bumped his shoulder with your own. “I’m glad I’ll be able to say I knew you when you were a nerdy freshman.”
“I’m still that nerdy freshman,” he huffed, “people just actually like my singing now.”
The band on stage switched to a fast paced song and the bar emptied a little as people flew to the dance floor. You couldn’t take your eyes off of him. They really deserved this. You crossed your fingers beneath the bar and hoped it was just the beginning.
“To be fair, I always liked your singing,” you told him, poking his chest. Eddie’s eyes shifted and you felt the same tightening again.
His eyes dropped back to yours, something new swimming in them, and your breath stuttered in your lungs. “I know you have,” he said, gaze darting across your face. “You’ve always been there for me.”
Not able to take the pressure in your sternum, you huffed. “And don’t forget that when you’re rich and famous, okay? I want a fancy BMW so I can taunt Steve with it.”
Eddie threw his head back and laughed. Instead of breaking the spell, your eyes drifted to his neck and you briefly thought about how appealing the muscles there were. Straightening so quickly that your spine audible snapped, you swallowed nervously.
What the fuck was that?
The look Eddie shot your way let you know that he’d caught whatever that was. Your mind raced in a thousand different directions but before you could choose a route to go down, a body pressed itself into your side.
“You guys, Jonathan puked,” Gareth said, matter of fact. “It was funny but then Steve started gagging.”
Liam joined in next, his eyes glazed. “Steve said he’s a sy-symp- sympat-” his face scrunched together when he realized he wasn’t getting the word out.
“He’s a sympathy puker?” You guessed, already knowing Steve wasn’t the best around puke. He was always the first domino to fall during hangover mornings.
“Ugh, you’re so smart,” Jeff complimented.
Brows rising, you elbowed Eddie. “Time to corral?” Sighing, Eddie nodded.
“Grab as many as you can and shove them into the right car,” he said, hands coming out to grab his bandmates before they could drift off. “Meet outside in ten?”
“Minutes?” You asked incredulously. “It’s going to take at least that long to get Steve to stop gagging.”
“Bet you five I can get them out in fifteen.”
Rolling your eyes, you slapped his outstretched hand. “That’s an easy win.”
And sure enough, you leaned against Steve’s car with an amused expression as Eddie tried for the fourth time to load Jeff into his van. You glanced at Robin, who was talking animatedly with Gareth about what sounded like cheese fries. A blur in the corner of your eye caught your attention and you watched Liam open the passenger door and pass Jonathan his joint.
“Jesus,” Eddie groaned, “okay you win, please, just-” he waved his hand towards your friends.
“Robin get in the car we have to go now,” you said firmly, knowing she was the hardest to convince but the one everyone would follow once she was.
Her expression morphed into indignation. “Gareth thinks bacon on fries is better than cheese! That’s – that’s treason.”
“Because it is better!” He said, clutching his head.
“Alright you two, you’re both right, how about that?” You turned to Gareth and glared until he simpered off towards Eddie without a backwards glance. “And you, into the car.”
“But-”
“I’ll tell everyone what you’re hiding in the box at the back of your closet,” you threatened. She paled and tripped in her hurry to the car. She knocked into a sleeping Nancy, who grunted when she landed in the middle seat with a loud thump.
“Byers, get your ass in gear or I’m telling Joyce!”
A sheepish Jonathan crawled into the car, jostling Robin who cried out and accidentally smacked a snoring Steve in the passenger seat. You quickly shut the door and locked them in. With a flourish, you took your bow and Eddie clapped. “I admit defeat o’great knight.”
“Knight in shining armor, please,” you clarified.
“Of course, of course.”
“You okay with your lot?” You asked, nodding to where Liam was starting to look a little green.
Eddie snorted. “Yeah, they’ll be fine. What about you?”
“Jonathan and Nancy live nearby, the rest of us are crashing at Steve’s. Like the good ol’ days,” you joked, shivering when a sudden cold gust of air blew your hair into your eyes.
A pair of hands came up to your arms, rubbing some warmth into them and you smiled. “Lucky, Gareth and Liam live in completely different directions,” he said with a roll of his eyes. You pointed to car behind him.
“You should lock them in before one makes a break for it,” you said, yawning and checking the time. Without giving you time to think, Eddie pulled you into a tight hug. Never needing a reason, you wrapped your arms around his waist and squeezed just as tightly back. His cold nose nudged your temple, inhaling deeply and you lean your face against his chest. His heartbeat fast and yours quickly matched its pace. With a soft sigh, Eddie let you go.
“Hey, but seriously, I’m so happy everyone else is finally seeing what I always did,” you told him, pinching one of his cheeks for levity.
Instead, he smiled at you softly. A small, little shy smile that made your heart flip. “Yeah?” His eyes softened, the brown deepening with his gaze. You felt your chest tighten painfully this time. Turning back to hop into your car, you rolled the window down and Eddie leaned into your space.
“Don’t let it get to your big head.” Eddie smiled at your barb but his eyes trailed down your face, the look in his gaze different. You leaned back to examine it but you couldn’t put your finger on it. “What?” His eyes darted back up to yours and it clicked. It looked like he knew something you didn’t.
A little surprised at what he saw there, he shook his head. “Nothing, nothing, see you tomorrow at work?” That sounded like a diversion. You had a full shift tomorrow but he was on towards the end at closing.
“Yeah,” you said, not sure you wanted to let go of this. As if sensing it, he surged forward to press a kiss to your cheek and you blinked, surprised.
“Drive home safe, call me when you get there, okay?” He said. “Leave a message if I’m not home yet. I won’t be able to sleep if I think you’re dead in a ditch somewhere.”
That, in the end, got a smile out of you. “Who would’ve thought you and Harrington would turn into the mothers of this ragtag group?”
“Hey,” he said, hands on his hips in a clear imitation of Steve, “you love it.”
“Yeah,” you said, starting your car and rolling up your window, “I do!”
5. Bringing you something just because it reminded them of you.
“Fuuuck,” you squawked, feet sliding out from under you. Bracing for the impact, your eyes flew open when Eddie’s hands slide through your underarms and steadied you. He pulled you up, your knees aching, and you both stilled.
“That…would’ve been bad,” you said quietly, looking down at the wet pavement outside the Wheeler’s house. Eddie’s eyes were wide, his gaze on the puddles.
“Note to self, slippery driveways might take down the mighty Nova but demobats are a walk in the park,” Eddie said, grinning when you whacked him.
“Ugh, they’re still outside,” Dustin shouted from the doorway, “come on, we’re taking a vote on which movie to watch first.”
Despite his teasing, you felt Eddie’s hand on your back – steady – as you followed Dustin towards the basement. Everyone was scattered, a few conversations going on at once. The party was back for the summer from college and, as tradition stated, a movie night was set on the first weekend.
El jumped up, grinning, and threw her arms around you. “Oh, hello,” you said, squeezing her tightly, “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you,” she said into your shoulder, words muffled. You glanced up to see Max tucked into Eddie’s embrace. He smiled when they swapped and Max’s grip bruised you. Kissing her temple, you watched them tumble back onto the first couch – Mike and Lucas waving at you both.
You made to step towards a beaming Will when a hand on your elbow stopped you. “Hey, I forgot to give this to you yesterday at work,” Eddie said, hand ruffling around in bag. He grinned after a moment, pulling it out triumphantly. A small drawstring bag swung wildly for a moment before coming to a stop. The black suede looked soft and lumpy.
“We just started that gig out at Sold Out last week and we were looking for something to eat before we drove back. I saw this in the window of a store and thought of you,” Eddie said, making your heart flip. You reached for the bag, a gold necklace spilling out the mouth.
“It’s a sunflower,” you said, voice faint, thumb tracing the small blooming flower.
Eddie nodded, already rooting in his bag for something else. “You said that was Barb’s favorite flower, right?” Suddenly, it felt like the entire room had gone quiet.
“It was,” Nancy said, leaning over your shoulder to look at the pendant. “She loved them, her room was covered.” An old memory flashed through your mind.
You’d met Barb when you were six, in kindergarten. She’d shared her chocolate with you and picked you as a partner for nap time. She had a sweet smile and gave great hugs. She was good and kind, and you’d been angry at the world for taking her. For a lot of things.
“Sunflowers symbolize friendship. But really, they just make me smile.”
For a moment, just a brief second, you could hear her light laughter echo within your memory. Nancy’s soft smile let you know that you weren’t alone.
“I thought you’d like it,” he said with a smile and you knew he was thinking of the tulips you’d both left at Chrissy’s grave last week. “This way you can have her close by.”
Nancy helped you clasp it around your neck and smiled down at you. Sound filtered back in as she grunted and turned to the boys. “Don’t throw the remote!”
You scrambled to stand before Eddie could find a seat, your had grabbing his. He stilled, looking back at you – the unasked question on his lips. Taking a step forward for a hug, for a second time within a span of five minutes, you tripped on a forgotten figurine. Eddie cradled you to him, staggered, but steady.
“Okay, I stand corrected. Rainy driveways and dnd figurines,” he joked, the smile from his gaze fading when he realized how close you’d landed.
The world moved around you both in a blur. This moment, you in his arms, had happened hundreds of times. You’d known Eddie for years, both of you were affectionate people. But this…was different. Time slowed and you felt Eddie’s pulse ricochet within your own, his lips parting in surprise. You eyes darted down to the movement, his lips chapped and in this bubble you’d created – a thought crossed your mind.
You wanted to press yours to his. You wanted to press every part of you against his.
Then, quickly, a second thought rose from your subconscious.
This wasn’t the first time you’d wanted to kiss him. It wasn’t the first time that your heart felt like it would burst at the sight of him. You liked the way your skin felt electrified at his touch. The way he always seemed to focus on you. The way you both always gravitated towards each other, like sunflowers bending towards the sun. Your eyes dipped lower and you felt a lump form in your throat. The way…you were dying to bite into that tattoo on his neck. The way you wondered if he’d squirm against you. If he’d push you into the-
Holy fucking shit, you loved Eddie. You were in love with Eddie. Your best friend. How the fuck had you been so blind?
Stumbling, you staggered back from his touch – not able to think clearly with him so close. You ripped your arms away from him and greedily sucked in air.
“What’s wrong?” Eleven asked you, realizing you were all but hyperventilating.
Pulse roaring in your ears, you didn’t know what to say. Dumbstruck, your limbs went numb as you finally met Eddie’s worried eyes. He stilled at the sight of your expression and suddenly the rug was pulled completely out from under you because he knew. The look in his eyes was one of complete and total understanding.
And you knew that he knew - and he knew that you knew that he knew.
Your mind flashed back to the moment outside the bar a few months ago. That look in his eyes. The way he’d been acting strange recently. He looked at you like he knew something you didn’t. Struck, you’d honestly be less shocked if the ground opened up and Vecna swallowed you whole.
His own panic flooding his face, he took a step forward.
“No!” You shouted, a touch too loud, your soul flying out your body and staring down at the situation with terror.
“Wait, just wait,” Eddie stammered, hands raised like he was approaching a scared animal. “Let’s talk about it.”
“Oh shit,” you heard Dustin mutter. The rest of room went silent.
Robin groaned, a soft thump following. “Oh no, this isn’t good.”
“Right now?” Steve hissed. “What the hell changed?”
“What the hell is happening?” Lucas grumbled.
Max sighed. “She just realized she’s in love with him.”
Eleven’s eyes widened and Lucas frowned. “Congratulations on being the last one to find out,” he said and somehow that made it worse. Your face crumpled and everyone’s glare turned towards him.
“Jesus Sinclair, have you heard of tact?”
Were you the absolute last person to know?
He was your best friend – you couldn’t, this would ruin everything. Oh God, what if he’d known and he never said anything because he didn’t feel the same? What if he did? You honestly didn’t know which was scarier.
As your friends descended into chaos, you glanced back at Eddie and found him frozen too. Overwhelmed and feeling like you’d been knocked around the ring a few times, you let your flight instinct take over. Taking the stairs two at a time, you were at the basement door in seconds.
Chaos erupted behind you.
You were at the door and fucking Christ, you couldn’t breathe. Why couldn’t you breathe? Was the ground shaking?
“Stay here,” you heard Eddie bark at everyone, his had tone not leaving any room for argument. Despite it all, you felt the zing of something travel down your spine at the sound of it. Before you could even analyze it for what it was, it triggered another fresh wave of panic.
You knew he’d be close behind, but you were used to running for your life at this point. Practically racing down the driveway, you scrambled into your car and slammed the door shut. Your first mistake was trying to still your shaking hand to get it into the ignition.
A body half-slammed into your passenger door and you screamed, terror taking over your rational side for a moment.
“Sorry! I’m sorry! The fucking grass is wet and I slipped,” Eddie said, backing up with his palms up. “Nova, please, don’t go. Not like this. I-”
“Nope!” You said, feeling like a stupid child but you weren’t able to process right now. You’d known Eddie since you were fourteen. That was a decade. How the fuck had you been so blind? “I can’t – Eddie, I can’t! Just give me a second, okay? I need – I need to process. Alone.”
The world felt like it was crumbling. Like you were back in the hell hole, clinging to Steve and Eddie for balance as the ground shook beneath you. Oh God, this was going change everything.
Your second mistake was turning to look at him. The knot in your chest tightened beyond belief at the sight of the heartbreak in his eyes. A flash of movement brought your attention to the several heads peeking out from the windows. Eddie’s head whipped around and you could feel his glare from where you sat. “Jesus Christ, does anyone know what privacy means?” You knew it was bad when you couldn’t even muster up a smile.
“Nov…”
Like a cornered animal, you felt tears well up. “Please. I’m sorry. Please Eddie, please.” Panic clawed up your throat, threatening to pull you under. Black dots danced across your vision.
He smiled and your heart broke at the emptiness in it. “Yeah, Nov, it’s okay. I’ll go back inside, just- take a few deep breaths before you go. Okay? Don’t drive like this. Just, deep breathing, remember?”
You slammed your eyes shut; you didn’t have the strength to look at him anymore. You nodded, taking an unsteady deep inhale. How was it possible that you were the one running and he was still thinking of you?
Not sure how long you sat there but by the time you opened your eyes, your tremor had settled and Eddie was gone. Taking a deep breath, you turned your car on and peeled away from the Wheeler house.
It took Robin and Steve exactly ten hours before they showed up on your doorstep.
“I know you’re in there asshole, open up!” Robin screamed.
Jesus. You flung the door open and glared. “I have neighbors.”
“You look like shit,” Robin said, matter a fact, with a small smile on her face. You groaned, dropping your face into your palms and Steve sighed.
“For fuck’s sake Robin, it hasn’t even been a day,” he said, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and guiding you to the couch.
Not one to ever be excluded, Robin smushed herself next to you. Her thigh pressed against yours and you found yourself stuck between your two friends – friends you hadn’t ever been good at lying to.
“I know why you’re here,” you started.
Robin snorted. “Well duh, what’d you think? That we got up at nine in the morning to come wish you a good morning? Even Dingus knows better than that.”
Biting back a laugh at her quick retort, you caught Steve’s exasperated glance and nearly broke. “Do not enable the behavior,” he hissed. “How do you feel?”
What a loaded question.
“I feel a little numb. Sort of, like, if I don’t acknowledge this is happening then it isn’t,” you said, pinching the bridge of your nose, “which, I guess, is what got us both into this mess in the first place.”
Robin’s expression softened and you sighed. “I’m just…I feel embarrassed mostly. I didn’t mean to be so dramatic – I just…I was so overwhelmed and it felt like I was drowning. You were all staring at us and I couldn’t think – I couldn’t breathe.”
“Hey, give yourself some credit,” Robin said, “you needed space and time and you asked for it. Everyone needs to understand that boundary.”
“Except for you two,” you joked weakly.
Robin huffed, waving a hand in the air. “We don’t have boundaries-”
“-we should though-” Steve muttered.
“-once you’re tortured by Russians together, you’re bonded for life,” Robin continued, ignoring Steve’s scrunched expression.
They started to bicker good-naturedly and your mind drifted to Eddie. You felt horrible but it didn’t override your need to crawl under the covers and hide yourself from the world. The one question on your mind refused to be put to rest.
“How could I have been so blind?” You wondered, not realizing you’d said it out loud until Robin leaned some of her weight onto you.
Steve pulled himself closed to the edge so he could turn to look at you. His gaze was gentle, eyes on you. “I mean this genuinely with no judgement, but how could you not have noticed?”
You threw your hands out, Robin dodging your left one expertly. “I don’t know! I think I knew on some level and just ignored it? Its…scary, feelings this big for someone who’s your best friend. I’m so scared, I don’t want to lose him,” you admitted quietly. Steve sighed and you glanced at him. “When did you guys know?”
Steve frowned but Robin spoke first. “To be fair, I don’t think Eddie knew right away either. At least not that I could see and we’ve known each other for a while now too. I realized sophomore year,” she said. “You always had those damn starbursts around. I know your favorites are the red ones because Dustin tried to take one from your stash and you almost chewed his hand off.”
A pile of starbursts were tossed onto your kitchen counter now. “So?” You asked, confused at the connection.
“They’re Eddie’s favorites too and you always let him grab them. I don’t think he even knows you do that, to this day. Let’s not forget how any time either of you ever went on a date or, God forbid, had a relationship, the other was always in a constant mood.”
Before that could sink in, Steve stirred. “I realized when he’d come to visit you at Scoops. Remember when I’d smushed that sundae into you. We were waiting on Robin to come back, worried about the Russians and you’d insisted on staying to help us. You had finally decided I was worthy and we were laughing about something stupid Dustin had said.”
You knew what moment he was talking about – you’d forgotten to call Eddie and tell him you didn’t need a ride home anymore. He’d arrived, on time as always, and walked in on you and Steve wrestling over some spilled ice cream.
“I turned with your ice cream too fast and hit your chin. I was trying to clean it off but you’d taken a handful and shoved it down my uniform. Dustin was practically on the floor laughing and I was chasing you with the bowl. Eddie walked in and instantly hated me. I knew he thought I was flirting with you, which I wasn’t. It was something in the way he looked at me. He wasn’t mad that he thought I liked you, he was mad because he thought I wasn’t worth your time – you know? He wasn’t even jealous, just protective,” he said with a shrug. “With you, it took a while, I think. I wasn��t sure if you felt the same for some time. Not until I knew you better.”
“Oh,” you said, throat dry. “Did everyone know but me?”
Steve bumped your shoulder amicably. “Maybe. It’s obvious to everyone now but it’s because it’s like you’re two magnets. The second the other is in the vicinity, your gravitate together. It’s…natural, almost. Something you’d expect,” he nodded, blinking down at you. “Does that make sense?”
“No,” you said petulantly at the same time Robin nodded.
Rolling her eyes, she grasped your hands and squeezed them. It was reminiscent of that moment in the emergency room, her eyes wide but determined.
“What do you want to do about it?”
You shook your head. “Too big a question.”
Steve took over. “Okay…how do you feel? You can love him as your friend, or be in love with him as a person, but if you don’t want to risk that – it’s up to you. We can have our own opinions-”
“-that you two need to get your heads out of your asses-” Robin said, expression furrowing.
“-but,” he said, shooting her a look, “it’s your choice.”
Feeling like your chest would explode with it, you abruptly stood, needing the space to pace a hole in your carpet. Chewing on your nail, you flung another hand in the air and frowned. “Of course I love him, how could I not? He’s…he’s Eddie. He’s my Eddie. Sometimes, at night, before going to bed I think about it you know. I think about how we were too close to be just best friends. We did things that went far past platonic and it was addicting. I – fuck. I love him. I love him.”
Shoving Steve’s hand off her shoulder, Robin stood, her arms coming down to your shoulders and shaking you. “So, I ask again, what do you want to do about it?”
You started to shake your head but she shut it down. “No, enough with this. You’re the bravest of us all. What do you want to do about it?”
“Robin-”
She waved a hand in Steve’s direction, her blue eyes turning sharp. “Say it.”
The knot in your chest choked you as you swallowed nervously. You wrung your hands together but you knew. You didn’t feel unsettled and panicked because you didn’t want him – you felt off kilter because he wasn’t here. You’d run away when you really wanted to just be with him. You’d hurt the one person you never wanted to hurt.
“I want – I want to tell him. I need to tell him!” You said, spine straightening.
Robin smiled. “There she is.”
“Oh my God,” you said, hands coming up to your face. “I just ran away; he must be freaking out.”
Steve stood, grabbing a yellow starburst. “He was a little…freaked out.”
Guilt flooded you as Robin glared at him.
“Shit, I need to talk to him. Right now. Where’re my shoes? I need to go!” You ran around your living room, frantically looking for your converse.
How the fuck could you have just left him behind? Without telling him – without saying the words. Suddenly, you remembered.
“Fuck! He’s in Indianapolis,” you said, slumping into a nearby chair, “he won’t be back until Sunday night.”
Steve frowned, his hands inching towards a red starburst and you shot him a glare.
“I’m distressed but not dead, get your hands off the red ones,” you snapped.
Robin laughed, knowing glint in her eyes and she grabbed a set of keys from your front table. “You have a fucking car and Indianapolis is three hours away, not across the country. Get what you need and let’s go.”
.
“Get off, you’re squishing me!” Max hissed at Lucas.
“Where do you want me to go? It’s a small car!”
“Will you two shut up?” Dustin snapped.
Robin sighed from the passenger seat and you took the same left as Steve did ahead of you. “You know, I don’t know why you all thought it’d be fun to make this into a group road trip,” she sighed, “you really don’t know how to mind your business!”
You snorted at the hypocrisy of the situation and she shot you a look. Shutting up, you made sure to stay behind the maroon BMW.
“We can’t miss this,” Dustin stressed, “he’s been in love with her for the entire time I’ve known him. I can’t deal with all the pining anymore. I get to see this through!”
You glared at him through the mirror. “We are not a soap opera to entertain yourself with,” you snapped.
By the time you’d made it out to your car, the rest of the party had managed to bike to your apartment with their own nosy agendas. Once they’d found out you were going to drive down to Eddie’s gig, they climbed into your cars – not leaving room for arguing. Because God forbid any of you do something without the entire party knowing.
“You probably won’t even be let in, this is a twenty one or older bar. As in, where they serve alcohol.”
“So?”
Robin shifted around to glare at them. “As in, you’re all not twenty-one yet?”
“Robin, please, what do you take us for? Rookies?” Dustin asked, his brow quirking. “I’m basically Corroded Coffin’s manager-”
“-you’re really not,” you said, thinking of Charlie, Gareth’s cousin who handled all the gigs and scheduling.
“-and I’ve got passes to all their gigs, it’ll be easy.”
Sharing a look with Robin, she shrugged. “Whatever, don’t whine about it to me when you’ve got to stay in the car the whole time.”
Not twenty minutes later, you both rolled your eyes at Dustin’s smug look as the bouncer let them all through with bright green bands indicating they couldn’t be served alcohol.
“Shut up,” Robin hissed.
“What time is it?” You asked, grabbing Steve’s wrist. “Shit, they go on soon – I think I can still catch them backstage.”
“Go, go!” Robin urged, shoving you forward.
Shouldering your way through the crowd, you were astounded at how packed the bar was. Determined, you kept slipping through the restless horde of people. You’d gotten halfway through when a loud strum stopped you. The crowd came alive, cheering and screaming as Eddie sauntered on stage.
Your heart dropped at the sight of the bags under his eyes. “Hello Indianapolis! How are you all tonight?”
The crowd went wild and you were jostled forward, right towards the front. Eddie was a few feet away and you sighed. Of course.
The band went through with introducing themselves, like they always did before starting, and you resigned yourself to catching him after their set. You watched Eddie swing his guitar over his shoulder, adjusting the strap. You don’t know how, in the sheer amount of people in the crowd, but as his eyes swept across the front row – they zeroed in on you.
Surprised, you blinked up at him. His answering grin was so wide, it cracked your heart further. Your breath rushed right out your lungs. Frozen, you stared up at him, and wondered how you could have ever been so blind as to not notice the way your heart always leapt around him. It rattled around in your ribcage, like a police siren. Him, we want him, it shouted at you, grinning up at you when you tried to knock it back into place.
I know, I know we do, you told it.
Of course you loved him, it was Eddie. How could you ever have thought otherwise? You wanted his friendship, because that was the most important part, but you wanted more. You’d always wanted more and you weren’t going to let fear keep you from reaching for it.
Eyes not leaving yours, he grabbed the mic again. “So, I have someone important in the audience today – someone who means a lot to me. She hasn’t heard our newest cover yet but, it’s one of her favorite songs. I’ll admit, it’s never been one of mine but I changed it around a little for her and hope you all like it too.”
Raising your brows at the first few notes, you couldn’t keep your delirious laugh in when you heard him start singing.
“Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth?
Ooh, Heaven is a place on Earth.”
Eddie’s voice lowered as he rasped out the vowels, the drums transforming the song entirely.
You watched Eddie transform, he always put his entire being into the performance and you loved watching him relish in it. Bobbing your head to the song, you danced alongside the three girls to your left.
Catching his eyes towards the end, he grinned as he inhaled.
“In this world, we're just beginnin'
To understand the miracle of livin'
Baby, I was afraid before
But I'm not afraid anymore.”
A smile made it’s way onto your face as you shook your head and you knew he’d caught it by his laugh. Staying right in the middle, with the crowd’s energy pulsing around you, you sat through the entire set.
As Metallica rung through the speakers, you knew it was their closing song. Eddie nodded towards the side door and you started to make your way there.
The guard at the door stood at your approach but the door behind him opened in time for you to catch Charlie’s smile. “She’s good,” she told him, “whenever you see her around this summer, let her through. She’s with Munson.”
The burly guard smiled then. “Oh, you’re his girl? Don’t worry, I never forget a face.” He waved you through and you knew she could read the mild embarrassment in your eyes.
“Don’t worry, I won’t pry,” she said, elbowing you, “but I’m happy for you two. Anyone with eyes can tell you’re gone on each other.”
Right.
“I’ve got to help them pack but you’ve been to the green room in the back – he’ll come by when they’re done.”
Thanking her, you stumbled your way there – nerves finally taking over you. You should’ve thought about what to say – how to say it. God, why did you feel so awkward? You’d fought monsters from another dimension but you couldn’t tell your best friend that you loved him?
The door suddenly burst open and Eddie came in, guitar still in hand and hair stuck to his skin. “Hey you,” you said, standing from the velvet couch. “You were amazing.”
“Yeah?” Eddie said hopefully, putting the familiar guitar down and turning his full attention to you. “I thought you weren’t going to come.”
“There was a full house, I – I’m so happy for you guys. Are you booked full for tomorrow night too?” You asked despite knowing the answer. You needed a moment, just a brief moment of normalcy before you flung yourself off the metaphorical cliff.
Eddie nodded, a ghost of a smile flashing across his face. He knew. He knew that you knew that he knew. Because of course he did. But he was letting you take this at your pace, because Eddie never did anything you didn’t want to. He always let you lead.
He opened his mouth, no doubt ready to let you distract yourself, but you were done with the pretenses.
“Fuck it,” you said, surging forward. A flash of surprise was the last thing you saw before you slammed Eddie into the wall and pressed your lips to his.
Finally! Your heart sang, finally, we’re home.
Eddie took a second but after a beat he met you just as fiercely. His grip was bruising on your waist, his other hand coming up to the back of your neck. Not giving him a chance to take the lead from you, you ran your fingers through his hair and pulled his head back. He moaned and the sound shot straight to your stomach. Butterflies in full force, you leaned back, out of breath and saw the dazed look in his eyes.
“Nova,” he begged, unseeing eyes darting around your face. “Nova.”
“I know,” you said, right before you dove back in and pressed open mouth kisses to his neck. And then, after all these years, you finally sunk your teeth into the meaty part of his neck. Right at the base of the skull tattoo. Eddie jerked, as if electrocuted, and shoved you back. Stumbling, you let him cradle your jaw, the other lowering you onto the couch.
Needing more, you whimpered and Eddie grinned. His knee pushed up between your legs and the pressure was amazing. Your hips stuttered, bumping into his and you both hissed. His teeth worried the sensitive skin of your neck and you whined as he lapped at the bruise he left.
“Eddie,” you gasped, “Eddie, please.”
His forehead came down to your shoulder, his chest heaving like he’d run a marathon, and you both just breathed the other in. At your nudging, he dropped his weight onto you and you jerked at the hardness you felt by your hip.
“Sorry,” he said, not sounding at all sorry. “The amount of adrenaline going through me right now-”
“It’s okay,” you assured him, hand drifting down his side but Eddie caught it. “I can help,” you offered. Jesus, you wanted to help if the pressure between your legs was any indication. Eddie’s face softened, his eyes drifting down your face and he groaned.
“I want that too but, maybe we should talk first? Before going past the no return point?”
You blinked. “Munson, I’m past the no return point,” you said, matter of fact. And it was true. There was no going back now.
His answering smile blinded you and you heart threatened to burst at the happiness you found there. “Yeah?” He asked, tone a little uneven.
You nodded, fingers trailing down his face. Eddie lifted himself off you, sitting on the couch and pulling you into his lap. “Yeah, me too.”
“When did you realize? And why didn’t you tell me?” You asked, ripping the band aid off.
“Because I was scared,” he admitted, “I...think I’ve always loved you. From that moment in the hallway when you chased away Tommy and his gang of assholes. You took one look at me and I think I was yours. I didn’t want to ruin what we had but there were times where I’d catch us in moments and I thought yeah, this could work. I wanted it so badly but I didn’t want to lose you. Then, years later, I realized you felt it too. I just, wanted you to get there on your own. I never wanted you to feel like you had no choice or no out. You’ll always have me, in any form you want me.”
Your heart melted. “You’re killing me,” you groaned, dropping your forehead to his shoulder.
Eddie laughed, his chest rumbling with it. “I’m sorry but, it’s the truth.”
“I know I’ve said it before but, I love you Eddie. How could I not?” You said, cradling his jaw in your hand.
Eddie pressed his lips to yours, eyes suspiciously red, and you decided to be mature enough and not tease him.
“Hey, you didn’t answer the first question. When did you really realize?”
“To be fair, it took me a while. Everyone knew I hated Mason,” he said and you thought back to your first boyfriend who’d moved to Texas your junior year, “which made the guys tease the shit out of me but I think I fully realized it for our senior prom. I was so bummed that you were going off to college and I was stuck in Hawkins. Then, you managed to blackmail Higgins into letting me go-”
“I didn’t blackmail him, I just asked,” you laughed.
“-I knew you knew I was upset and I could tell you wanted to cheer me up. But then you did that stupid promposal-”
“Hey!”
“And you had that big bouquet of daisies. And it hit me like a fucking truck, I’m not going to lie. That’s why – I don’t blame you. It was a lot,” he said, his fingers trailing down your cheek. “We’d been friends for years at that point. It was both shocking and stupidly obvious. How could I not have realized? It took you, standing in that meadow behind my old trailer, that massive glitter poster and those flowers. It was like…lightning. One moment I was totally oblivious and then the next, I just knew.”
“Is that why you never dated anyone after that? I thought you were hung up on Joan,” you said, thinking back on the girl he dated through high school.
He smiled, looking down at you. “No, I’ve always been yours. You’re branded on my soul, Supernova. From that first moment in that old gross hallway.”
“How did you know that I felt the same? I didn’t even know.”
Your heart sung, breath completely stolen at the look he gave you. “I mean, I didn’t know-” You leaned back to shoot him a look and he snorted. “There wasn’t an exact moment! After you went to Indie State and we’d hang out there were just small moments, I promise. Like, how you’d wait up for my call when I got home after visiting you. Or, how you stayed up all night to help me study for my finals – like two years in a row. Or that time that I caught the flu and you hit every pharmacy in Indiana getting me what I needed. Or the way Wayne just downright loves you – there’s no competition. You’re his favorite.”
“Because I bring him baked goods,” you said, laughing.
Eddie smiled. “Yeah, but he’s always loved you because you care. You just – you do all these little things and I didn’t notice until I did. I don’t know.”
You mulled that over and realized he was right. The way Eddie would steer you away from sharp corners, or always made sure you walked on the opposite side of the curb. How he always knew your order or how you liked you take your coffee. You flashed back to his broken body and how you’d snapped and lost it. How he’d only thought of making sure you were okay when he woke up.
In hindsight, you realized, he was right. It wasn’t one big moment. It was a lot of little ones.
“I’m sorry it took me so long to get there,” you whispered, thumb tracing his bottom lip, “I’m sorry for leaving you at the Wheeler’s house. I should’ve been braver.”
“You are brave,” he whispered back, “I knew you just needed time. Besides, I was going to give you a week before I hunted you down.”
Laughing, you wrapped your arm around his shoulder, the other played with his necklace. “Yeah?” You felt suddenly shy.
“Yeah. Even if I was wrong and you didn’t feel the same way,” he shrugged, “I wasn’t scared enough to let you go. Romantic or platonic, Nova, we’re for life. Between Vecna and surviving ninth grade gym class together, we’re practically trauma bonded at this point.”
You laughed realizing you’d already had a lifetime of experiences with him. Eyes trailing down his content expression, you kissed the corner of his mouth. But a lifetime wasn’t enough. You wanted more. And you’d have more – you had all the time in the world.
“Yeah, Munson, we’re for life,” you agreed and leaned back down to kiss him.
Because hey, even he was right sometimes.
A/N: thank you all so much for the comments on my other fic, you cannot imagine what it means to me! This is the cover I was thinking of if anyone's interested.
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Hiya! Do you know any Sterek fics where Derek rejects the mate bond with Stiles and just ignores it all, leading to Stiles feeling the strain or pain of an ignored/incomplete bond? I've read one before where Derek just moved away cuz he didn't think it was a big deal and Stiles really took the brunt of it. But any fics that are similar would be perfect. P.S. Thank you for everything that you do and I hope that you're having a great day!
Oh yes. I love this kind of angst.
soulmates tbh by bleep0bleep
(1/1 I 1,423 I Teen)
"It’s been five months," Derek says darkly. "Why am I still getting these proposals? You know these are probably all fake marks."
Five months since the paparazzi had snapped that photo of him with the overzealous fan tugging at his shirt, five months since millions of people on the Internet realized that the birthmark revealed was in fact, the mark, five months Derek was inundated by claims from people who desperately wanted him to believe that they were his soul-mate.
Second Chances by rootbeer
(1/1 I 2,624 I General)
"A lot of times the ‘markings’ were common, simple things you said to strangers all the time. 'Excuse me'; 'thank you'; 'hello'. Some got extremely romantic things like 'it’s you isn’t it? I’ve been waiting for you' or 'Wow you’re really pretty'. And they were always the first words their soulmate would ever say to them.
Of course, having 'You are the fucking worst kind of person in the world' tattooed down your side, didn’t bode well. How fucked up was Stiles Stilinski that even his fucking Soulmate hated him? High School had been a special kind of hell when all the kids learned what his tattoo said—despite his best efforts to keep it a secret."
Three Marks by sanam
(8/8 I 113,736 I Mature)
"And then there was pain again, but this time it was in only three places—his arm, below his clavicle, and next to his heart, all on the left side. It felt like the skin was being sliced apart, ripped open, flayed off— And suddenly it was done. Derek looked across the room and saw the boy on the floor, looking about as bad as Derek felt."
Derek and Stiles learn that bonding is probably best done with ridiculous amounts of video games and maybe a little bit of time.
I Hunt For You With Bloody Feet by CharWright5
(26/26 I 200,462 I Explicit)
“Mates don't always mean happy ever after.”
When twenty-year-old born omega werewolf Stiles Stilinski received that cryptic email from his twin brother—who'd been missing for two years exactly—in a language the two of them had made up, his drive to find Stuart is doubled. The search leads him to Oak Creek, the most secured and heavily fortified city in all of California, where he finds that not only is his brother dead, but also the literal alpha of his Dreams in Derek Hale—who just happens to be his twin's Mate and the main suspect in Stiles' eyes. Despite an agreement to fight mutual feelings, the two are still drawn to each other as they try to solve the case themselves, uncovering a plot that goes deeper than the murder of just one wolf.
Blue Monday by ExpectNothingGainEverything
(19/? I 535,709 I Explicit)
Stiles would have never guessed that the star player of the lacrosse team and presumably the hottest guy in school who everyone wanted a piece of and one of his most hated bullies would turn out to be his soulmate.
Derek would never have dreamed that fate would be so cruel to pair him up with a freak like Stilinski.
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December 13th
December masterlist
Masterlist
“We have a theory,” Nick started. Annette sat in the barn together with Nick and the potion-master Snully. “The poison had both doses of faebane and a different poison that have cause amnesia. Amnesia is memory loss.”
Annette couldn’t help how her entire body slumped down.
They had been lying to her the entire time. She had trusted them, and they had been lying. How could she have been so stupid? She should have understood that they weren’t kind. That they didn’t want what’s best for her. Tears found their way through her eyes.
Nick nodded to Snully and she left. Nick got up from his seat and carefully embraced Annette. She cried in his arms.
Who were the people she had been calling her family for these three years? Maybe she didn’t know them at all. Maybe they were evil.
They were evil, they had been poisoning her for three years.
“The best cure for amnesia is to learn about your life before the memory loss. I suggest you travel to the Night Court and try to find someone that might know you.”
Going to the Night Court? Annette stopped crying a little was she thought. She knew nothing about the Night Court. She had only seen it on the map.
“The Night Court is north in Prythian. That’s where other illyrians live. Do you know illyrians?” Annette shook her head. “Illyrians are fae like you. They have bat like wings. Illyrians are often very traditional and it’s no secret that female illyrians struggle.”
Nick wanted to send her to a court where she wouldn’t be safe? That didn’t seem right.
“The illyrians live in camps. I have heard that the camp named Windhaven is where the High Lord has most control. I suggest you travel there.”
Windhaven. The name seemed familiar, but she couldn’t recall from where. She had perhaps read about it in one of her books? If only her backpack hadn’t burned, she could have read about illyrians in her book.
“What if I don’t get my memory back? Or if I get lost or scared? I don’t think I can trust anyone else about my memory for some time.”
Annette felt like her entire world had been flipped upside down. Her family were evil. They probably weren’t her family at all, because who would hurt their family?
“You’re always welcome here, Annette. I would allow you to stay, but I’m certain that someone’s looking for you out there. Waiting.”
“You really think so?”
“Just follow your heart, my dear. Follow your heart and you’ll be okay.”
It was a cloud free sky that evening too. Annette and Nick had been planning her travel route for the entire day. She was leaving for the Night Court tomorrow.
Seeing the Winter Lights were a dream come true. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, but she wasn’t satisfied. Something was missing.
“The Winter Lights can also be seen in the Night Court. You would miss them too much.”
Annette turned to Nick as he spoke and sat down beside her. She sat down on the same spot as yesterday. She had watched the lights for an hour already. She had been thinking about everything and nothing. It was refreshing.
“Really? I think I’ll miss them anyway.”
“On the evening of Winter Solstice, the Winter Lights can be seen all over Prythian. Except for here in Winter, the Night Court is the best place to watch the lights.”
They both sat and watched the lights for a while. But Annette sat with some questions she needed to ask Nick.
“You told me to follow my heart, but how do I know if my heart is showing me the right direction?”
Nick leaned back a little and closed his eyes.
“I have always followed my heart, and it has never showed me the wrong direction. I have, however, also ignored the pull of my heart and the consequences were fatal.”
Annette reached her hand over to Nicks and held it.
“My mate and I had a big fight. He was mad and I was mad, so when he pulled on the bond, I didn’t listen. After a while, the bond broke and I knew he was gone. I have never forgiven myself.”
Annette felt shivers all over her body. She wanted to cry. The fear of losing a mating bond took over her entire body. But she didn’t have mate? Or did she?
“Do you think my chest pulling could be a mating bond?” she asked nick the second she realized it was a possibility.
“I would seem similar to one, yes.”
She had a mate.
Azriel had a good day yesterday, but today he struggled to get out of bed. He cried, a lot. And he felt awful. He missed you so much, he ended up throwing up. He was sure he looked like a mess.
He laid in his bed, but the thoughts of you laying there with him only made him feel worse. But there was nothing he could do with it. He couldn’t move without you.
His shadows had been screaming for you the entire night. It had been a while since last time they did that, and it felt so much worse than usual. His head was in a lot of pain.
“Y/N, mate, home, please, miss, need, please”
He understood that they wouldn’t stop.
A knock on his door pulled him out of his thoughts. He didn’t answer.
“The entire corridor is filled with your shadows, Az. I know you’re in there. Can I come in?” It was Rhys.
Azriel didn’t really want to speak to anyone, but he let his shadows open the door anyway.
Rhys walked in with Nyx on his arm. Azriel immediately softened a little. Azriel loved being an uncle even if he didn’t always do the best job.
Nyx loved him either way. Mostly because of his shadows. They loved to play together.
“Hard day?” Rhys asked him, but he didn’t bother to answer. It was obvious that he had a hard day. “Nyx and I thought we would make a snowfae. Cass told me yesterday that you were keeping the traditions alive, so I thought I would ask if you wanted to join. And if you don’t want to today, we can do it tomorrow.”
Both Azriel and Rhys knew that Nyx was too little to request making a snowfae, but it didn’t matter. Rhys was doing his best to help Azriel.
He wasn’t going to let you down. He was going to do this. December was your favourite month of the year. He would do this for you.
Getting out of his bed was perhaps the hardest thing he have ever done. But doing so made you proud.
They walked out on the terrace of the House of Wind and started to roll snow. Azriel made the middle, Rhys made the bottom and Nyx just played. It didn’t take a long time, but being outside in fresh air always helped.
Azriel was going to start making the head of the snowfae, when he suddenly felt the familiar feeling of snow hitting the back of his head. However, it wasn’t as hard and painful it usually was with his brothers. This felt almost soft.
Azriel turned around and was met by Nyx holding up his small hand with the tiniest snowball in it. It was obvious that Rhys was the one throwing snow with his son’s hand, but it either way brought an honest smile to Azriel’s face.
One day at a time. One smile at a time. Suddenly his day became just a little bit lighter.
Taglist: @prettylittlewrites @hailqueenconquer @onebadassunicorn @mich0731 @tele86 @mellowmusings @anarchiii @anainkandpaper @donnadiddadog @atomictyphoonkitten @annablack @graciepies @salvatoresister1 @nastylicious @plants-w0rld
Let me know if you want to be added!
Dividers by: @issysh3ll
#acotar#azriel#azriel fanfic#azriel x reader#azriel x y/n#azriel x you#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x oc#azriel x original character
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Stranger | Chapter 5
Chapter Links: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]
TW: Descriptions of Violence, Mentions of Cannibalism
Tags: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Atreides!Reader, Arranged Marriage, Eventual Smut, POV Second Person, No use of y/n, Original Characters, Canon What Canon
Word Count: 2.3k
A/N: Not proofread!! Holy moly. Here it is, folks. The scene that inspired this whole fic. I had fun writing this so I really hope you enjoy it. Once again, I appreciate everyone who likes, comments, and/or leaves kudos so much. I really started this fic for myself but good golly, that dopamine rush whenever I get a notif might be more addicting than spice. I'm glad to be part of the bald man brigade.
Also, I can't believe I'm only now questioning why I decided to write this in the second person? I guess maybe I thought this fic would be a lot shorter and not that deep, lol. At this point 'y/n' probably has enough personality to just be a straight-up OC. It's funnier because I don't even find second-person or y/n fics any more engaging either. I always detach myself by giving 'y/n' her own name and only seeing her as a character in the fic.
ANYWAY, sorry to ramble. Stay safe and have a good one, ya weirdos.
You step out into the dark cul-de-sac of the guest hall, illuminated only by the large suspensor lamp in the middle. Feyd-Rautha looks you up and down, seemingly entranced by how the dim light casts his shadow on your modest dress. Atreides green, he recognized.
"Trying to sneak into my rooms again?" you say arms crossed, leaning on your door. "I didn't appreciate the last time, by the way."
"It's my house," he says cooly, "and I did knock this time."
You stare at him indifferently.
"Quite the display from you yesterday morning, using The Voice on me." His voice low and raspy, "I should have you drawn and quartered."
You scoff in his face. "You almost choked me to death. Are you trying to start a war?"
He takes a step closer and his face is inches from yours, you can feel his breath on your cheek, "I didn't think I'd like you this much, little hawk."
"What do you want, Feyd-Rautha?" you had no patience for him right now.
"Ah," he steps back, a dark smile on his face, "I've been waiting to hear my name from your tongue." His hand reaches for your lips. "I've grown quite tired of 'na-Baron'."
You grab his wrist before he can touch you. "If you're only here to toy with me, I would rather be left alone to prepare for bed." You release his hand and turn to open your door.
Feyd-Rautha props an arm against the doorway to block you. "We're to be married in three days," he says, "and I just can't seem to bring myself to let go of my 'harpies', as you called them." He meets your gaze. "You said you'd kill them. Did you mean that?"
You look up at him with steely eyes. He towered over you but your heart felt no fear, "Yes."
His coy smile returns. "Good. Come to my training hall tomorrow," he says, walking away.
"What?" you call after him.
"Dress to fight," he says over his shoulder. "I want to see what you can do, Atreides."
You needed no help from Zora in putting on a loose shirt and long pants. The plain beige outfit certainly wasn't as elegant as the dresses you had been wearing so far. But it was comfortable and you could fight in it, which was all that mattered. Still, you look yourself in the mirror. The soft, airy fabrics draped over your figure well but perhaps you were not in the best shape as you once were. Your muscle mass is much less than your brother's and he wasn't particularly built himself. You admit you did wane off your training sessions with Gurney and Paul leading up to your departure from Caladan. Nevertheless, you were still a skilled warrior. Another secret you've been keeping from the Harkonnens.
You were 14 when you started learning the blade. Watching Paul, 2 years your senior, practice with the Atreides Warmaster lit a fire in you. You didn't hesitate to pester your father to let you train with them and of course, there was nothing he could deny his darling daughter. You were a fierce and determined student. Gurney Halleck was a man you genuinely believed to be one of the best fighters in the Imperium, along with Duncan Idaho. Gurney would train you and Paul on even days. On odd days, your mother would teach you the Weirding Way. These lessons, much like the rest of your mother's teachings, your father wanted to know nothing about. After becoming decently adept at Prana-Bindu and gaining almost complete physical control of your body, Lady Jessica insisted that you also be skilled in the Bene Gesserit style of combat.
You were far from mastery in either but the combination of both trainings made you a formidable fighter. Despite this, you could never seem to beat your brother in a sparring match. A fact that frustrated you to no end, though you appreciated that Paul never went easy on you. You'd always blame it on him having trained for longer than you have. But in truth, you knew there had just always been something special about him.
"Are you ready, my lady?" Zora's soft voice wakes you from your thoughts.
"Hm? Right. Yes, let's go." You quickly tie your hair out of the way and grab your father's dagger from atop your dresser.
There was no fanfare when you entered the hall. On one end, the na-Baron's concubines sat chained on the steps of the shallow recessed pit in their leathers, their glares piercing through you. Your eyes linger on them as Feyd-Rautha and his Warmaster greet you.
"I was starting to think my lady bride was bluffing," Feyd-Rautha says as you approach him. The older man beside him offers you a polite bow.
"Perhaps she wasn't so keen on your brutish games," you bite back. "Your lord uncle won't be joining us?"
"No," Feyd-Rautha crosses his arms, "but he'll be hearing about your victory. Or your demise."
"Right. Well, I assume you'll be releasing them from those chains," you nod towards his pets "Not sure why they're necessary."
"Oh, trust me, little hawk. They're necessary." Feyd-Rautha motions to a servant.
"Your blade and shield, my lady," they bow, presenting you with a knife and a small device you recognize as a Holtzman shield.
"I've brought my own," you unsheath your father's dagger. You contemplate taking the shield but remembering that the na-Baron forwent it during his gladiator fight, you decide to do so as well. "They've no weapons anyway, the shield seems pointless."
Feyd-Rautha shrugs, "If you insist."
You take a deep breath, "Let's get this over with."
You lightly stretch as you walk down the steps of the shallow pit to stand opposite the na-Baron's concubines. You had come into this on the pretense of righteousness. For Iassa, you told yourself. But you've known her a mere two days. A part of you wanted to show off. You were good and you knew it. You could probably kill anyone in this room, even Feyd-Rautha. You craved the respect of the people here: the Harkonnens, the people of Geidi Prime. You figured this was one way to get it.
Feyd-Rautha walks around the pit to one of his concubines and kneels to whisper something in her ear. You assume a fighting stance when he moves to release her from the chains. When you meet her eyes, they are filled with feral bloodlust.
Suddenly, you weren't so bold. The veil of courage you have maintained since you arrived, even when Feyd-Rautha had your neck in his grip, is torn apart when you face this woman. You could tell no part of her would hesitate to rip your throat out with her bare teeth. You were almost relieved they were unarmed, but you weren't sure if that would make them any less lethal.
Fear grew in your chest and you had less than a moment to recite the Litany in your head before the concubine lunged at you.
You crouch down in time and slash at her abdomen as she approaches you. You turn to face her on the other side of the pit and she wastes no time in attacking you again. She attempts to grab your armed hand but you take hold of her wrist first and move to pin it behind her back. Quickly, your blade drags across her throat and she falls to your feet.
The kill has not yet registered in your mind but your heart is racing. You can almost hear your blood coursing through your veins. You held your arms outstretched, your eyes focused ahead, ready for the next one.
Across the pit, Feyd-Rautha licks his lips, smiling as he releases his second concubine. This time, you walk toward her while she moves to attack you. You clock her head with the pommel of your dagger and knock her a few steps back. She reaches a hand to wipe the blood beginning to drip out of her nose. After examining it, she snarls and bares her sharp teeth at you. Your mind is blank now. She dodges your first slash then manages to land a blow to your jaw. You seethe from the pain. You spit out the mixture of blood and saliva filling your mouth. The anger at the hit drives you to rush at her. Seeing an opening, you duck down to her waist and stab her twice. As she falls to her knees, the look of determination doesn't leave her eyes until the very last moment.
When you turn around, Feyd-Rautha has already released the last concubine. The ruthless scream she lets out disorients you. She pounces and knocks you over. She straddles you and pins your arms to the ground, your blade sliding inches away. She screams again in your face at the death of her sisters. You wedge your right knee between you and her abdomen, the only thing keeping her teeth from reaching your throat. You grunt as you struggle to free your hands. In your periphery, you see Feyd-Rautha, wielding his own blade, take a step into the pit.
"GET BACK," you roar, and he is powerless to refuse.
You turn back to your opponent still on top of you and you butt her head with your own. She loosens her grip and you kick her off to hastily crawl to your weapon. When she reorients herself and attempts to grab you again, you hook a knee under her arm and flip the both of you over. With your weight on her chest and both your knees pinning her arms down, she thrashes underneath you, claws digging into your right ankle. You take your blade in both hands and her screaming is silenced when you sink your knife deep into her heart.
When you rise, the room is quiet. Your chest heaves. The stark white ceiling lights don't help the lightheadedness that begins to wash over you in the post-adrenaline rush. Feyd-Rautha says something from behind you but his speech is garbled as you reel from the thrill of what just transpired. You were electrified. You almost... wanted more.
Then, the realization of the revolting scene you are in settles upon you and you are knocked off your high. You look at the leather-clad bodies scattered around you, the grotesque way they lay on the floor, the red blood pooling around them made brighter by the sterile grayness of the room. You did this.
A hand on your shoulder snaps you out of it. In reflex, you turn and raise your blade at the offender.
Feyd-Rautha holds his hands up, "Whoa, easy, Atreides. Trying to kill me? Don't want to start a war, do you?"
You yield your weapon. Your eyes dodge his as you look to your feet and try to steady your breathing.
"Enjoy your first taste of blood?" Feyd-Rautha says, the look in his eyes indecipherable to you. He raises a hand and swipes his thumb on your cheek. It comes away covered in crimson.
You gasp and reach for your face with your own hand. You don't even know if it's your blood or theirs, or when it got on you. Your heart pounded, unable to decide whether you were repulsed or proud.
"Look at you," he says licking the red off his finger. You could not help but stare at him through the strands of your hair that had come undone in the fighting. "You're beautiful like this," his hand reaches for your face again.
"No," you say low and quiet when you swat his hand away, "you're sick." You didn't know if you meant him or yourself. You calmly turn to leave. No one stops you when you make your way up the shallow steps of the pit. As you pass Iassa—no, Zora—by the doorway, you tell her flatly, "Prepare a bath."
You had never taken a life before. Today, you took three. You were glad you didn't know their names. You decided you'd never find out.
After Zora pours a final pitcher of hot water into the bath, you tell her, "You may go. I'll dress myself later, thank you."
She bows and makes her way out of your rooms.
In your solitude, you bring your knees to your chest. You had been quick to wipe the blood off your cheek before you even reached your quarters. Now, you cup the water into your hands and rub it into your face, the slight sting of the heat comforting you.
He was a cruel man, your betrothed. This is what you've decided. Having you kill the concubines he claimed to want to keep so much. But wasn't it you who threatened to kill them? He started it, you argue with yourself, when he had Iassa killed. You felt like a child.
When you used to hear of Feyd-Rautha's exploits, you had to mask your disgust. And yet now, you had killed so easily in that pit as he had in the arena. What was this place doing to you?
When you left Caladan, Paul had never killed anyone either. You wonder if he ever does, would he feel the same exhilaration you did when you slit that first concubine's throat. No. Your brother was fierce but, like your father, he had a good heart. You beat him by three. You hoped it would stay that way.
You think about your future here, marrying Feyd-Rautha. Producing heir after heir under the Baron's watchful eye. You were a broodmare. Despite all your fancy training and education. Despite your little demonstration earlier. It was the bitter truth.
You missed home. You missed walking along the beach at night with your father. You missed your mother's gentle hands brushing your hair. You missed the banter and teasing with your brother. You missed Gurney, and Duncan, and the cold breeze on your balcony, and getting to roam free and going anywhere you pleased. When the tears come, you sink deep into the bath so they might fade away in the water.
Chapter Links: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]
Taglist: @torchbearerkyle @austinswhitewolf @dreamlandcreations @emeraldsgirl @strawberryfieldsforevermore @bornslippys @vexis-world @aoi-targaryen @alexandrainlove @mamawiggers1980 @sstardussty @aboutthenabaron
#feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha x you#feyd rautha fic#feyd rautha#feyd rautha harkonnen#atreides reader#dune#dune part two#space-mango-company#fic: stranger
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19/21 and 26 with........Haitani's!?!?!??! 🫣🫣🫣
I just can't stop thinking of them 😩😩
A/N: It was a little hard for me to start this one ngl, I was unsure how I'd be able to write the brothers sharing like THIS but I guess it's okay. I hope you enjoy it!! I brought the exhibitionsim out more with the enjoyment of being recorded instead of a public setting or someone else actively watching (the ending also kind of ties back into it) ANYWAYS MWUAH
Double penetration (one hole)/threesome/exhibitionism x Haitani Ran, Haitani Rindou
“Ran you fuck--didn’t you ever learn how to share?” The younger Haitani snarled, shoving the older brother away from you. “It’s my turn.”
You don’t know how you got in between them--two of the most dangerous men in the entire country. You’ve heard stories of the terrors they got into when they were younger in Roppongi, how they climbed the ranks through different gangs, how they ended up as executives for the nastiest crime syndicate on this side of the world. It should terrify you, really, how you’ve gotten yourself tied up with these men. They could throw you away in an instant, kill you if you looked at them wrong--make you disappear from the life you know and use you as a drug mule. A thousand things can go wrong.
And yet, you can’t help but smile whenever you’re with them.
You landed a job as a bartender in one of their clubs, normal job for the most part. You’d go in, do a bit of flirting, fight off a few way too drunk guys, and go home. You had no idea you’d been being watched for the better part of three weeks by the brothers themselves. You didn’t know what kind of place the club was until well after they formally introduced themselves as the co-owners, the Haitani brothers. Even then, you treated them the same way you’ve treated any other boss-with respect, but minimal interactions (as best you could, anyways.) They liked that, how you didn’t try to get money out of them, or sleep with them. They liked to keep it playful with their staff, but the women (and men!) would throw themselves immediately and it was such a turn off--Rindou would usually fire them the night after. They kept showing up at the clubs during your shifts, keeping a close eye on you. Ran started becoming bold and flirting with you on the job, which you brushed off as best you could.
It wasn’t until an unruly patron tried to grab you after your shift that the men really intervened with you, Ran pulling you close into his chest to shield you (kind of) as Rindou pulled the trigger between the pig’s eyes and called in a cleaning crew to get rid of the body. It was then that you understood who they were, who really owned the club. They steadied themselves to hear grating screaming come from you, girls were usually scared after seeing something like that. Instead, you wrapped your arms around Ran tight, gripping at the back of his shirt and letting out a shaky ‘thank you’ before steadying yourself and (attempting) to go home for the night.
They hadn’t left you alone since.
And now you find yourself caught in between them most nights after your shift, in one of their beds. Tonight was different, you’ve noticed, because Ran started pulling out his phone and setting it up on the dresser across from the bed. “Mind if we record it, pretty girl?” His voice always sent shivers down your spine. “Go ahead-” your voice came out shakier than you hoped, hearing the younger brother attached to your neck chuckle. “Already so worked up, baby, barely even started.” He teased, kissing and biting at the juncture of your shoulder, fingers dipping underneath the band of your underwear. You whimpered, fingers combing through his wild locks and tugging at the root, bringing him up from your neck enough to press your lips against his--all tongue and teeth as he bit down on your lower lip leaving you breathless. He took the opportunity of your parted lips to shove his tongue in your mouth, licking at your own. You tried to keep up with his overwhelming pace, suckling on the tip of his tongue making him groan. “Fuuck baby, got so lucky with you didn’t we?” Rindou’s voice was ragged, much different than the smoothness of Ran’s--his was nearly scratchy in the best way possible. It made your hair stand up on the back of your neck. His hands came up to your throat, one wrapping around the back while the other grasped at your lower jaw, keeping you attached to him. You felt two taps on your ass cheek, and hands prying your underwear lower until it hit your knees. “Come on pretty, help me out and take these off.” Ran joined in, and you lifted each knee one at a time off the bed to let him remove the clothing fully. Your hands clawed at Rindou’s chest, trying to keep yourself afloat as the elder Haitani pressed open mouth kisses on your shoulder blades, trailing to your back. “Don’t think we can ever let you go, sweet girl.” Ran mumbled against your skin, raking his nails over the fronts of your thighs towards your weeping cunt. You broke away from Rindou enough to gasp for breath, nose to nose when you let out a small cry at the feeling of Ran’s hand slapping at your clit.
Your lower half jolted away from the stimulation, but when Ran pressed himself against your back you had no choice but to take each smack he gave you. “Gotta take everything I give you, angel. Now be good for me, yeah?” Two fingers suddenly shoved themselves deep into your pussy, and Rindou had pressed his lips back to yours to muffle your cries. Even after all the times you’ve been in their beds, their fingers are a stretch to begin with. You’re dripping wet, but his fingers are so long they hit so deep. Ran starts off slow, sucking hickies into your shoulders and neck as he finger fucks you, smiling against your skin when he feels you fucking yourself back onto him. “There you go, beautiful~” He coos, scissoring his fingers inside of you rubbing at your walls so good. Your closed eyes open to look at Rindou in front of you, eyes already wild as he watches you meet each thrust of his brother’s fingers. A hand traveled lower from your jaw to grasp fully at your throat, fingers wrapping around and squeezing. “You can take some more, right baby?” Your eyes fluttered, barely able to nod while he was holding onto you like this, mouth dropping open.
Rindou pressed his thumb against your nub, unable to move you had no choice but to take the stimulation--spit pooling at the corners of your mouth the same way tears did in your eyes. “R-Rindou-aah, please” You begged, though your brain couldn’t conceptualize why. A harsh smack to your ass left you squealing. “I’m here too, pretty.” You could hear the jealousy in Ran’s voice, and you knew you were right when you saw Rindou smirking. “Do better and maybe she won’t forget.” A slew of curses left Ran’s mouth before smacking at your ass again. “S-sorry! I’m sorry, Ran, I didn’t forget--honest.” You whimpered, doing your best to turn away from Rindou and crane your neck to look at Ran over your shoulder. “Aw, I know sweetheart. Gimme a kiss.” You occupied yourself with kissing Ran, who kissed you much slower than his counterpart. While Rindou was a wildfire, Ran was like flowing water. He kissed you slow and steady, taking his time to lick at your mouth and taste you. While Rindou was overwhelming, Ran was dizzying. Regardless of who was on you at any moment, they made you feel just as good.
Ran kept you distracted enough for Rindou to push his ring and middle finger into your cunt alongside his brother’s fingers--filling you and stretching more than they had in the past. “Oh fuck” You breathed out, trying yout best to keep up with Ran but Rindou was shoving himself into you so harshly already it was difficult to breathe. Rindou’s fingers were thicker than the elder brother, filling you up as Ran’s fingers hit deep. Ran let you go, and you turned down to see Rindou’s fingers pumping in and out of you, juices oozing onto his fingers with each fuck. Your forehead hit his chest, a hand reaching back and grasping at Ran’s wrist for some sick form of grounding--spreading your legs more to give them easier access to your sloppy pussy. “S’this feel good, baby?” Rindou questioned, curling his fingers towards that gummy spot in your cunt. “A-ah, yeah, fuck, yeah” You whimpered, clenching around their sets of fingers. Ran laughed behind you, “Yeah? Like when we fuck you with our fingers, angel? You want more?” Nodding against Rindou’s chest, they removed their fingers from your cunt--creaminess covering their hands. “Look at that~” Ran whistled, making a show of spreading his fingers and letting your stickiness web between them. He turned your head towards the camera, and the brother’s chuckled seeing how fucked out you looked in the camera. “Lick ‘em clean, beautiful.” Ran spoke first, presenting his fingers in front of your face as you greedily sucked at them, taking them deep into your mouth to the knuckle and making sure you sucked them clean. You watched yourself in the front camera lapping at his digits, clenching your pussy around air. When Ran pulled his fingers out you immediately turned to Rindou and stuck your tongue out--expectantly. “What a good girl you are” He teased, shoving his fingers into your mouth until you gagged, and turned you to face the camera again. “Go ahead baby.” Stray tears fell down your cheeks as you licked around his spread fingers tasting yourself on him.
Ran moved off the bed to bring the phone closer, now on the night stand as he laid down, bringing you with him. You understood immediately what he wanted, and lined yourself up to his cock as he filmed you lowering yourself. He bit his tongue holding back a moan while your pretty sounds filled the air, steadying yourself on his chest before your arms are ripped back behind you. “Come on baby, you can do it right?” Rindou taunted, kissing at your shoulders while you kept a steady pace bouncing on Ran’s cock. The older brother had the camera right at your hole, watching the way your pussy swallowed him up and drooled around the corners with your juices. His free hand held onto your hip, Rindou pulling you back to lean more against him as Ran started meeting each bounce on his lap with a thrust of his own, a webbing of white covering his dick each time he pulled out. “Fuck baby, look so good taking my cock. You think you can take another one?” You weren’t sure you understood, and before you had time to think more about the question the phone was placed back down on the stand and Rindou pushed you towards the other, Ran grabbing at your face and making a scene of kissing you sloppy in view of the camera. “Look at yourself, pretty baby.” He whispered against your ear, holding you by the jaw towards the camera when you started feeling Rindou prodding at your already stretched out cunt with his own cock. Your eyes squeezed closed with your brows scrunched, mouth hanging open as he pushed himself into your hole alongside Ran. “Ooh my god, fuck! S’much, wait--wait it’s so much!” You cried out, Ran slapping you lightly on your cheek to get your attention.
“Open your eyes, pretty girl. Look at yourself while you get fucked by us.” Your eyes were fuzzy, unable to fully focus as you watched yourself drool, tongue lolling out and tears rolling down your cheeks as Rindou filled you inch by inch. You should be embarrassed, feel shame as they made you watch yourself like this--being used by two dangerous men. But you couldn’t feel anything except turned on, looking at your own reflection drooling and crying uncontrollably on their cocks filling you more than they ever have. You subconsciously tightened your walls around them, and their groans filled the air. “Fuck! So fucking horny watching yourself, huh baby?” Rindou snickered, leaning over and angling the camera to your lower bodies, pulling you up for a clear angle of both cocks pumping in and out of your pussy. Just like you did Ran’s, Rindou’s cock was covered in your creamy cunt, squelching and gushing with each pap, pap, pap of their cocks fucking up into you. You couldn’t do much but take it, sobbing with overwhelming pleasure as they used you like a sleeve. Rindou’s fingers came around your front to rub and pinch at your swollen nub, and in no time he had you crying out and creaming over them, each push in and pull out of their cocks leaving with a squish. Ran’s hands had a strong grip on your hips as he fucked up into you, and last minute pulling out to cum on your tummy, painting your front white with his cum.
With only Rindou now inside your cunt he quickened his pace and fucked you harder, tugging at your biceps and pulling your arms back as leverage. Ran moved the phone again, for full access to your body and face as the younger brother left you a mess. “Ready for me, baby?” He grunted behind you and you nodded with a sob, suddenly feeling him leave your pussy and make a mess on your ass, grabbing the phone from his brother and recording him slap his cock on your ass, smearing his mess around. Giving the phone back, Ran recorded up to your face now. “Smile at the camera, pretty girl.” Panting, you looked up at yourself again in the phone, lazy smile playing on your lips--fucked stupid. Ran scooped his cum on a finger while you were still watching yourself and lifted it to your mouth, watching you lick him clean and sticking your tongue out as proof.
He stopped the recording and Rindou lowered you onto the bed, mumbling to himself how ‘gross’ it was to share a hole like that with his brother. “Whatever dude--she felt good.” Ran called over to the younger Haitani as he left to grab something to wipe you down with. “You good, baby?” He whispered to you, smoothing down your hair as you nodded with a smile. He fiddled with his phone as Rindou wiped you clean, kissing your forehead and praising how good of a job you did for them. His phone pinged, before Ran spoke saying “Sent it to you.” When he finally took a look he saw it was in the group chat they had with Sanzu, snapping his head up to look at his brother who already had a grin like the devil and shrugged.
“Oops.”
#haitani ran#haitani rindou#rindou haitani#ran haitani#haitani brothers#haitani ran x reader#haitani rindou x reader#haitani x reader#rindou x reader#ran x reader#rindou haitani x reader#ran haitani x reader#haitani brothers x reader#haitani rindou smut#haitani ran smut#tokyo revengers#tokyo revengers smut#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo rev#tokrev#milk writes#milk kinktober
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so while sitting at the golf range, i saw a man walk by with his dog—a dilf type of man—and it got me thinking…
ari levinson x fem reader
idk the word count bc i wrote it on here but it’s not too long, i promise! **18+ ONLY** for implied size kink and mentions of praise kink and illusions to filthy thoughts ok thank ♡
you huff and stomp your foot after swinging and missing the ball, yet again. why is golf so hard? and why is the ball so tiny? it hardly seems fair to have a club that long and such a small target to hit.
you try to focus and remember what little you learned before coming to the range, but it’s sweltering out and you’re frustrated, so all you want to do is throw your club as far as possible. at least then you’d get something on the green.
someone clears their throat from behind you.
“what?” you snap as you spin on your heel, the glare you had ready to aim at the person smoothing out quickly once you see them.
it’s a man, tall and broad and tanned and very shirtless, torso glistening with sweat amidst the hair on his chest. his shaggy hair is tied back messily and his cheeks are ruddy beneath his beard from the heat.
“hi,” the man greets with a grin that has your tummy fluttering. “i was walking by,” he continues, waving at the sidewalk several yards away (which is another thing—what’s with golf courses being in the middle of neighborhoods?!) and you feel slight shame at having been caught throwing a fit. “saw you were having some trouble and thought maybe i could offer my help.”
you bite your lip. “that’s kind of embarrassing,” you mumble.
he shrugs. “everyone has to start somewhere.”
and that’s… actually very true and also terribly kind of him to say, so you agree to let him give you some pointers. he tries by just telling you how to fix your stance and your grip, all from a respectable distance, even going as far as showing you by mimicking it and how to follow through on your swings. but after you still keep missing the ball entirely or only hitting it a few feet and veering sharply to the right, he clicks his tongue, pursing his lips in thought.
“would you be okay if i show you in a more, uh, hands on way?” he asks.
you simply shake your head in response, because if you opened your mouth right now you’d probably start begging, and not just for golfing tips.
he approaches calmly, stepping up behind you. his body heat in proximity to yours doesn’t help with the summer sun beating down on both of you, but you can’t find it in you to really complain, especially as you hear him take a breath before he finally wraps his toned arms around you.
“left hand here,” he instructs, voice low in your ear, “right hand below it, yes, there you go. keep this arm straight, okay? like this.”
he does a few fake swings with you, his hands wrapped around yours. it’s damn near impossible to pay attention, but you’re really trying your best. mostly.
“okay, now, keep your eyes on the ball when you swing. don’t look out to where you want it go, just keep looking down at the ball. alright?”
you turn your head, looking up and meeting his eyes and your breath hitches when you exhale. he’s so big, easily dwarfing you with how close he is to you, the smell of his sweat hitting your nose and, instead of finding it gross, you find that it has you wanting to clench your thighs together.
“eyes on the ball,” he repeats, sounding a lot more gruff than before. it’s hard, but you tear your gaze away and do as he says. “good. feet shoulder width apart. that’s perfect.”
you fight a shiver and bite your lip again. this is not the time or place for your praise kink to kick in.
“i’m gonna let go and step back, then you can swing. okay?”
you nod, holding your stance and waiting for the all-clear, and when you get it you take a deep breath and slowly let it out, following what he’s told you and swinging… and you hit it straight down the green! it doesn’t go too far, but it’s the furthest you’ve hit a ball yet, and you let out a shocked, happy laugh.
“oh my god, i did it!” you giggle, bouncing on your toes and spinning to face him, catching his stare snapping up from your ass to your face. you’re suddenly extremely happy you chose some of your tightest athletic shorts.
“that was great,” he praises with a smile.
you let out another giggle, this one a bit higher in pitch from your nerves. “thanks for your help. i really appreciate it.”
“it’s no problem at all, i’m happy it paid off.”
“is there any way i could repay you?” you blurt, not wanting to miss the chance at extending your time with him, also not wanting to come across as too eager and missing by a mile.
he hums teasingly, pretending to think about it, then smirks. “how about we start with lunch?” he suggests, eyes roving down your body and back up. “and then i can give you another tip.”
he winks and you burst into even more giggles at the terrible joke, but you can’t even be mad about it. he looks quite pleased with himself at the sound of your laughter.
(and then, later, he looks smug as fuck at the sounds of your absolute ruin by him.)
…OKAY BYE😬😇😅😂♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
#ari levinson x reader#ari levinson x you#ari levinson fic#ari levinson fanfiction#ari levinson drabble#ari levinson smut#pls excuse any and all mistakes bc i did not proofread this either#unbeta’d we die like men
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Wanbelyn
introduction pt. i | pt. ii | pt. iii
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ch. lxxx - broken face
neurosurgeon!hongjoong × reader
genre : dad!au
rating : mature; crude jokes and filthy language
wc : 2.3 k
buy me coffee ?
where love and peace is held, i never expected for this to happen. i planned and i planned, i expected, and i hoped, but it was never you. you held what i wanted hostage to make room for you, the thing that i needed but has no means of acceptance. deny me, live your best life.
To say that you rushed into the gym was an understatement because you practically flew through the door, almost breaking it in the process. You even ignored San who was beaming when he saw you, trying to go in for a hug only for you to push past him whilst yelling 'SORRY, MY BABY NEEDS ME MORE'. Hell, you didn't even take notice of Yeosang who had to console San for being ignored by you.
When you got to the classroom, your eyes zeroed in on the very familiar tuft of hair and not because of the fact that he was the only one there.
In a flash, you dropped to your knees and cupped Kijoong's face who was surprised when he was suddenly spun around. "Kijoong, are you okay?" you asked worriedly, the first aid kit you had hauled with you left on the floor as you tried to look for signs that his face was, as San said, broken, "Did you fight with someone?" you asked, still looking for signs of injury.
Now fully realizing that you were there with him. Kijoong grinned widely and jumped into your arms, wrapping his own shorter ones around your neck and trying to climb you like a tree. It was then that you realized that Kijoong was perfectly fine and perhaps you had fallen so absolutely stupidly to San's words. You risked getting a speeding ticket only to see that Kijoong was perfectly fine and that confused you more than anything. "Kijoong, did you get hurt?" you asked again, still wanting to make sure as it would greatly affect how dead Choi San would be. Instead of telling you if he was okay, Kijoong proceeded to tell you about what he had been learning in school and in class with San.
In a state of confusion, the door opened and at first you thought that it was San which would have been nice since that would mean that you could spare his staff from seeing the strangling of a lifetime. So it took you by surprise when you saw Hongjoong standing there, looking as surprised as you.
"(y/n)?" God, it had been a while since you heard him call your name, "What are you doing here?" he asked, confused but slightly hopeful for some reason. "I- San told me Kijoong got hurt and I got here as fast as I could. What are you doing here?" "Picking Kijoong up?" that was stupid of you to ask and you really wanted to kick yourself for that. "But also, San told me Kijoong got in a fight with a kid and I needed to sign an incident report? I just saw him outside, he told me to get the story from Kijoong first so I came here." As if on cue, after Hongjoong was done explaining his being there, the door suddenly closed and locked, surprising you and Hongjoong yet again.
Just as you rushed to try to open the door, Yeosang's head popped up from the small window with San above him. "Kang Yeosang, what the hell do you think you're doing?" you hissed, trying to open the door which of course didn't happen as it was locked. "I did nothing, San was the one who locked you in," he smiled innocently only to receive a smack on the shoulder from San. You turned your attention to San and glared at him, "You have exactly 5 seconds to open this door, Choi San, I'm not kidding I will whoop you," you threatened, oblivious that Hongjoong was looking at you with amusement and affection, as if you were the most adorable being on earth and it didn't go unnoticed by your two friends outside. "You can't scare me (y/n)," San was lying straight out of his ass but he had to keep the facade to ensure that the plan would work, "You two need to talk things out and reverse the divorce because Yeosang and I have created a gaming group chat with Yunho and Mingi and I'm not about to give that up especially since we're going into a competition soon and we want you both to be there!" "Bye (y/n)! Have a good talk!" and with that, both Yeosang and San walked away, leaving you in a room with the guy whom you harboured feelings for but unfortunately had to repress for the sake of his son.
"So..." Hongjoong started, clearing his throat, "Seems like we were lied to, huh?" he stated the obvious. Sighing, you turned around to look at Hongjoong but kept your distance by leaning against the door, "Yeah, seems like it and I have a feeling those two were not the only ones in on this," you huffed. Hongjoong only chuckled as he managed to put two and two together rather quickly.
"How have you been though?" he asked. You didn't know how to answer that because from professional aspect, you were finally getting back on track and you were happy with that. But emotional-wise? You've been repressing everything to the point that you were functioning like a robot in real life, using work as a distraction. Little did you know, Hongjoong wasn't faring any better but he had to kept things going for him as best as he could because Kijoong was depending on him to be okay. You were about to answer when he interjected, "Because I haven't been fine since you left." It genuinely surprised you that Hongjoong was the one to reveal his feelings first. From your experience, something dramatic had to happen between the two of you first before he came clean about how he was actually feeling. The honesty felt refreshing.
"Neither have I," you answered, sending him a sad smile.
Though it was a sad realization for the two of you, Hongjoong couldn't help but feel butterflies in his stomach when he found out that you were as much as not okay as he had been.
"I missed you. Home is not home when you're not there," Hongjoong confessed, voice slightly shaky as he was trying his hard to not be too emotional. Your shoulders slumped hearing that, feeling bad that Hongjoong felt like that and thought it wasn't your fault exactly, you still feel somewhat at fault.
The two of you were so focused on each other that you completely missed the way Kijoong was staring at the two of you with furrowed eyebrows and a displeased expression. You only took notice of him again when he ran up to you and hit you on the hip with a balled fist. "No!" He exclaimed loudly, surprising both you and Hongjoong who immediately chastised him. "Kijoong!" he called out but Kijoong went for another hit and that was when Hongjoong swooped down to hold Kijoong back but Kijoong was straining against him, trying to get another hit on you. "Hey, no!" Hongjoong tried his best to keep Kijoong from trying to hurt you again but the boy was still going wild in his arms. "No!" Kijoong screamed again, louder this time as he tried his best to get his fists to reach you.
After coddling him due to your own self-blaming, you decided to step in and get to the bottom of the issue. You joined in and crouched in front of Kijoong, holding both of his hands in your own. "Use your words," you stated, looking straight into Kijoong's eyes. Kijoong noticed the serious tone in your voice and he felt something in him, something that didn't make him feel good. He managed to slip one hand out of your grasp and swung, successfully hitting you in the head much to Hongjoong's horror. As the parent, Hongjoong was about to haul Kijoong up and out one way or another so he wouldn't hurt you anymore but you didn't falter. Instead, you simply grabbed his loose hand and held it at the front. "Use your words Kim Kijoong, you know you can," you stressed, maintaining eye contact with him.
Kijoong's chest began heaving and you thought he was about to scream at you but the first thing he did was burst into tears. The sound of his son bawling made Hongjoong let go in worry, wanting to immediately calm him down but he was stopped from taking action when Kijoong spoke up, "Why you left? You left and you made daddy sad," he cried out while trying to get you to let go of his hands but you kept them firm, "Kijoong, what did you mean by that?" you asked, your voice sounding less harsh but it still had an element of seriousness to it. Through tears and sobs, Kijoong looked to you and then to his dad, and then to you again before attempting to speak even though it looked like he was struggling, "Y-you said you leave when I don't need you a-and you ma-de daddy sad," he told you.
Though his words were simple and rather vague, you immediately realize what he was trying to tell you. You did tell him that you would only leave when he no longer needed you and you did tell him that you cared for him and his dad. So obviously in his simple mind, when you did leave when he still needed you and when Hongjoong had to deal with the absence of you, he blamed you. It didn't help that you already blamed yourself for Kijoong's episodes and the decision to leave them, hearing what Kijoong had to say made your heart break.
You were about to apologize and acknowledge that you messed up when Hongjoong grabbed Kijoong and turned around to face him, "Hey, you can't blame (y/n) like that, Kijoong. (y/n) didn't leave us, she was giving us time because she was scared that you'd get sick again, remember? Remember when you had another episode and then again?" Kijoong nodded, remembering both times he had an episode around you, "You remember what you told Uncle Mingi? You remember telling him you didn't want (y/n) to be your mommy because then she'd leave me?" again, Kijoong nodded, his mind clearing up as his sobs died down slowly. "(y/n) is not like your mom, Kijoong. Your mom... She was sick so she decided to go, she couldn't be anyone's mommy and yes, that made me sad but I'm no longer sad about mommy being gone because I had (y/n)." Though Hongjoong was talking to his son, you couldn't help but think that he was probably also talking to you, telling you how he felt about you and how serious he was about his feelings. "I was happy when she was around but then you got sick so we agreed that you should get better first and yes, that made me sad, but that was not (y/n)'s fault, that was my fault too. I'd rather be sad for a long time than to see you sick again and (y/n) also thinks the same way. We didn't want to be apart but we thought we had to."
Hongjoong didn't realize that he was starting to cry too until Kijoon reached up to wipe the tears off of his face. "I'm sorry daddy, sorry for being sick," he sniffled, now thinking that his dad was sad partially because of him. But Hongjoong immediately shook his head and pulled Kijoong into a tight embrace, "You silly little monkey, you don't ever apologize for being sick, okay? You can't help being sick, you have no say in that," then he pulled away, "But you have a say in letting people into your, into our lives, you hear me?"
It was then that Hongjoong turned his attention to you, seeing you looking at him so sadly. A small smile appeared on Hongjoong's face as he reached a hand to softly take yours, immediately rubbing his thumb gently on the back of your hand. "And I want you in our lives (y/n). The distance between us confirmed my feelings that it was never the proximity that affected my feelings for you, it was never the fact that we were simply in each other's lives. I didn't choose to have feelings for you but I was gifted the ability to develop feelings for you because it was you, it had to be you. I don't want to force you nor do I want to pressure you, but I really want you back in my life. You heard what Kijoong sad, I was sad without you," You couldn't help but chuckle and tried to look away when you felt a tear fell from your eye from being reunited with the father and son duo once again, remembering how much you silently miss them but not being able to know if you should approach them again only to know that both of them were missing you too. Seeing the tear, Kijoong reached out again and this time, he wiped the tear off of your face. It may seem stupid, but that moment made you feel like it was proof that Kijoong didn't have anything against you, not anymore at least and you didn't know how to feel about that.
"So, can you find it in yourself to come back to us?" Hongjoong asked, hopeful but he was still allowing you to make a decision.
Your shoulders slumped and you let out an exhale. You took a moment to look at Hongjoong and then at Kijoong, remembering all the good times with them and then also the bad times. The bad times that brought so many emotions and even some trauma back. As much as you were reluctant to give an answer right then and there, you knew you had to because if not then, then you would just postpone and risk ruining things further.
This is going to seem mean, but...
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Jaune Revenge
Winter: Ruby we found her.
Ruby: Cinder. Everyone it's time.
Yang: Ruby no-
Ruby: I have to stop her. I am the only one.
Jaune: What?
Ruby: It has to be me.
Jaune: Who the hell- who the hell decided that?!
Ruby: She is my problem.
Jaune: I know this- oh hell no she- Ruby!
Ruby: Farewell my friend. I pray that I return.
Jaune: Oh hell-
After a minute what seemed like hours of fighting.
Cinder: Yes finally.
Ruby: *barely catching her breath*
Cinder: After all this time… you finally die Ruby R-
*Boom*
Cinder: *screams in pain*
Ruby: *looks behind her* Jaune.
Jaune: *throws the gun away and slaps Ruby across her face* The f*** is wrong with you?!
Ruby Ow.
Jaune: You really think I would let you steal my prey? My kill? After all the bull**** that b**** put me through. The f***!
Ruby: Jaune I-
Jaune: I had dreams. Dreams of when I have this b**** in my sights. As her life is now in the palm of my hands. Having her beg for forgiveness has I take what little breath she has from her now feeble hands. Oh God yes…
Ruby: …. Um
Jaune: And have you learned nothing from your people? Penny? Pyrrha? Alyx?!
Ruby: Whoa Jaune don't be–
Jaune: Stop running off somewhere, prepared to die. We do not do 1 v 1. We jump people. It is the most effective means to win. You are not built for that kind of time. There is no shame in having a squad, especially for enemies.
Ruby: But-
Jaune: Like your uncle, he sucks. He has lost a one-on-one every time since Beacon. Winter, hit him. Tyrian poisoned him. Hazel could have ended his career. Your uncle needed two other hunters to take Tyrian in. He even required Tyrian to fight Clover. Your uncle isn't about that action.
Ruby: Well sheesh…
Jaune: Now you excuse me- *pulls out the sword* I will finish this.
Cinder: You weakling. You piece of crap. What are you going to do to me huh? Kill me. Don't make me laugh. You don't have the- *stab in her arm* Ah! *mouths is covered*
Jaune: Oh no Fall maiden, we are just getting started.
Cinder: *scared*
Nora: Ruby, sorry we’re late but-
Cinder: *screams in agony* My legs! My legs!
RWBY: *shock*
Jaune: Nah-nah we ain't done yet. This is for Pyrrha.*beats Cinder down*
Cinder: *yells in pain* Help me! Help me! Ruby help me! Please!
NERO: *scared*
Jaune This one's for Penny! *Stab Cinder's chest*
Cinder: *screams*
Jaune: *healing and stabbing Cinder repeatedly* No, you gonna feel this. Yeah. Yeah!!
NPRA: *Summer and Alyx are shocked while Pyrrha and Penny fist pump*
RHAW: *Glad they never met Jaune*
Adam: Oh it was good that I didn't try to fight him on the train.
Hazel: Even though I know I can beat him…. It scares me that he could have a chance of killing me himself.
Ironwood: Oh so he finally learned. Thank God.
Clover: Sir please-
Ironwood: We died because of these kids, Clover, I have a right to be like this.
Cinder: No. No. Not my eye. Not my last eye, please! *screams as her eye is pulled out*
Salem: *watching from a far* Oo she will die. Not my problem.
Jaune: *exiles*
Cinder: *dead*
Jaune: Finally. And Oscar.
Oscar: Um… yeah-yeah what is it?
Jaune: Are you Ozpin now?
Oscar: N-no. Nope. I'm still here.
Jaune: Your girl. Your problem. I am tired of being the third wheel. The seventh wheel really.
Weiss: I mean -
Jaune: Figure out what you want in life then we'll talk.
Emerald: Oh my God I have maiden powers. I was Cinder’s last thoughts. I-
Jaune: *readies his sword*
Emerald: Jaune-Jaune calm down. We are good. We are good. Best behavior.
Jaune: You damn right b****.
Emerald: Jesus what have you been through on that island?!
Jaune: Isolation is a b****!
Cinder: *in hell and curled up in a ball*
Rogue: How was your freedom as a slave?
Cinder: Shut up. And why are you here?
Hazel: Are you serious? He left you unsupervised, and in a family where you were put through extreme work conditions to survive.
Adam: You were a slave and the only thing he did was train you.
Roman: He didn't even get you out. He abandoned you. He is a monster.
#rwby#jaune arc#ruby rose#yang xiao long#weiss schnee#lie ren#nora valkyrie#blake belladonna#penny polendina#pyrrha nikos#oscar pines#cinder fall#roman torchwick#hazel rainart#adam taurus#rwby alyx#emerald sustrai#james ironwood#clover ebi#summer rose#qrow branwen
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"Like there was no tomorrow." Daryl Dixon—Chapter 2.
Chapter Summary: Everything seems peaceful the few days you spend in the prison while your best friend recovers from an illness, but after a rough night when walkers threaten to break in, the so-called Governor attacks the prison the next day, causing Daryl's group to scatter, leaving you and him to go on your own.
PAIRING: Daryl Dixon x reader
WARNING: Death, blood, a lot of bad words hehe (but also romance and even some comedy if I can get it right hehe)
ERA: From prison onwards.
A/N: Sorry if this is boring :( I didn't elaborate much on the fight between the prison group and the governor because they were different scenes and this chapter was getting really long, but I hope you like it. Spoiler alert: Daryl talking bad about your falcon a few times made me laugh hehe
Chapter 1
“What happened to your arm?”
With a slight nod, you point to Daryl’s left arm, specifically to the inner part of his elbow that is covered by white tape. On the way back to the prison, the quiet place stretches between a dirt road and dust that the car kicks up, trees on the sides and a lot of vegetation that almost creates the illusion that nothing happened to the world, but every so often when you two leave behind a walker that is swinging aimlessly along the road, you realize that nothing is as it used to be.
“Nothing.” Daryl shifts uncomfortably, shooting you a glance before looking ahead. You roll your eyes, because even though you knew you were probably the only person Daryl had ever fully opened up to in the past, (showing you his scars and all), he still maintained that reserved personality, but even though the world had changed, you’re glad to know those little things are still intact. “Can ya tell yer rat to stop lookin' at me like that?”
Sitting on your right wrist, Aeris has her eyes fixed on Daryl, her deep, dark-colored gaze watching for the slightest movement, but it’s like she’s searching the depths of his soul. It’s an overflowing interest that makes you chuckle.
“Look at my baby hating you.” Your free hand strokes her soft fur, black and white feathers and a mix of them. “Good girl.”
Daryl frowns.
“How ya even know she’s a girl? Did ya look up her skirt?”
You try to hide the mockery in your next words.
“Aeris was a baby when I found her, and she learned to listen to the walkers and find her way out of those flesh-eating things on her own. I don’t mean to insult you, but I don’t think a boy would be that smart without being taught first.” You shrug. “You know that men’s stupidity knows no bounds.”
Daryl snorts.
“Yer hatred is bigger than yer height.”
Shocked, you laugh.
“Asshole!”
But he looks at you in exasperation, though at the same time, remembering and missing those old times.
“Woman, ain’t ya tired of cursin’ at me?”
You frown, playing dumb.
“It’s not like a curse you while running, is it?”
Daryl snorts again, but a smile appears on his lips.
“Ya are silly, y’know?”
You chuckle, settling into your seat as the sight of the prison comes into view. The place is big, but so is the horde of walkers stacked against the gates, always growling, all day and all night, hands outstretched and mouths open in their relentless attempt to kill. A man and a woman are on the other side, stabbing their knives into the heads of the walkers through the grates, trying to lessen the dead weight hanging over the bars.
When the man sees the car arrive, he opens the secondary and main gates, and Daryl drives inside through both as the people outside seal the place back up. The moment the car shuts off, you put Aeris on your shoulder to grab your backpack from the ground, opening the door to feel the first rays of the day’s sun on your covered skin. The grass is losing its color, and in the distance you can see the land that has been piled up, with cross-shaped woods on top of it.
Graves.
When you turn to meet the two people, the young woman stops dead in her tracks, the man a step behind.
“Shit. Is that a falcon?” Her green eyes glint in the light, but her gaze is unsure.
“No. S'a flying rat.” Daryl stops beside you, but he ignores the serious look you give him. “(Y/N), this is Maggie and Rick. This is (Y/N), my…”
His next words hang in the warm air.
“Believe it or not, I’m his ex. And probably the only one.” You smile as you shake their hands, trying to hide your laughter at Maggie’s incredulous look, the way her mouth struggles not to hang open in surprise, and Rick’s frown and slightly widened eyes. “Nice to meet you two.”
“Yeah. Same here.” Maggie clears her throat before continuing, trying not to smile too much as she glances at Daryl before looking back at you. “I’ll take you to Sam.”
You nod before walking with her, leaving the men behind. Daryl's eyes follow you, his deep gaze narrowing under the stifling heat and the feeling of being exposed like that, because you always had that strange power over him, the way you could mock him and he would hate you silently (again, not seriously) while saying thank you at the same time.
Love was confusing, and stupid sometimes. Daryl knew that better than anyone, but when he turns around to meet Rick, Daryl has to swallow, trying to keep a serious expression.
"What?"
"Nothing, it's just… you never mentioned you had a girlfriend." Rick shakes his head, doing his best not to smile too much. "She's beautiful AND she looks like a badass, you know? With the gun and her falcon, but she kind of hates you. I can see that."
Looking away for a few seconds, Daryl swears in a low voice.
"Nah. Hatin' me is her love language." Suddenly tired of that conversation, Daryl walks away towards the gate, without being able to hear Rick's chuckle. "C'mon, I'll help ya clear the way."
Back inside the prison, you find out Sam was developing peritonitis from her appendix, which was a few days away from rupturing but was treated in time, thankfully. You feel relief in your bones knowing that surgery wasn’t necessary, and although Maggie’s dad could perform it, knowing that he’s a vet made you feel slightly nervous but infinitely grateful.
“So…” Maggie tries not to smile too much, still in disbelief, because she too finds it strange and fascinating to know more about Daryl’s past, considering that he didn’t let much of himself show. “You and Daryl? I see you like men who don’t comb their hair.”
You laugh.
“What can I say? The heart wants what the heart wants.”
She laughs with you, leading you towards the cells on the left of the large place.
“I met Daryl when the group came to our farm, and no offense, but he doesn’t seem like the kind of man who was in a relationship, was it something serious?”
“Something like that…” You shrug, just to downplay the silent pain that came after that night. “We actually broke up months before all this started. But don’t let his rudeness fool you, because between us…” You move closer to her a little, only to whisper a comical revenge against him. “Daryl liked to cuddle.”
Maggie has to cover her mouth with a hand to keep from laughing out loud, stopping at a half-open cell.
“When you’re done talking to Sam, I’ll be outside if you want to join us.”
She gives you a kind smile, the same one you return.
“Thank you, Maggie.”
As she walks away, you enter the cell. The first thing you see is Sam’s hair that’s spread out on the pillow, hands clasped together over her stomach, one of her arms hooked up to an IV, closed eyes that flutter open as she senses your presence in the small room. At that moment, her tired face lights up through the pain she’s surely still feeling inside, but she smiles when she sees you sit on the edge of the small bed, Aeris making a sound that seems to be her own way of greeting her friend.
“I’m glad to see your favorite girl has taken care of you while I’m gone.”
As your hand takes hers, Sam squeezes it lightly, sighing at your warmth mixing with her own.
“Don’t be jealous. You two are my favorite girls.” You chuckle, but the happiness merges with the huge relief in your chest at seeing your person still alive. “I’m so happy to see you’re okay, Sami. I guess running into Daryl wasn’t a curse after all.”
You’re joking to lighten the mood and she knows it, laughing with you at Daryl’s expense.
“Daryl’s been so attentive ever since I got here that night, always coming to check on me, asking if I needed anything else, even staying to talk to me for a while, though we always ended up talking about you.” Sam smiles, weakly. “It’s pretty clear that Daryl hasn’t forgotten you, love. But really, maybe that’s why I wasn’t surprised when Maggie told me that he was the one who gave me blood all this time.”
For a second, you feel your heart stop, eyes slightly wider, but now the tape on his arm made all the sense in the world.
“What?”
“Yeah. He even joked that he had special magical blood. Didn't Daryl tell you that?"
You shake your head softly, trying to put your scattered thoughts in order.
“You met him. Daryl is awfully quiet most of the time.”
“Really?” Sam frowns, but keeps a smile. “Well, with you, he seemed like a different person. I liked the way he looked at you, kind of intense, but it seemed like he was trying to tell you what you meant to him: maybe the poor guy didn’t know how to use his words. Also, don’t think I didn’t notice his hand on your lower back.”
For a few seconds, your gaze gets lost in an empty spot in the room. There in the back of your mind, stored deep in your memories, you always thought about his reasons for breaking up with you when everything seemed to be fine between you two. The lack of love was painful but understandable, but other reasons didn’t seem to make sense, not when it was Merle who said that, if Daryl had fallen in love, he would be in love for life.
“But that’s in the past.” You say, looking back at her. “Now we just have to worry about you getting better so we can go home.”
Sam nods, though neither you nor she delves into the fact that maybe the word home no longer exists.
“How are the old folks? I miss them. You left them protected, right?"”
You smile softly.
“They're fine, worried about you, but fine. And yes, I left them all the things they needed until we can go back”
When Sam’s eyes begin to close, you can see the heaviness of her exhaustion, so you let her rest before heading out of the prison to help.
When another heavy night falls, and with a candle that smells like cinnamon and that hides the rottenness of the outside and the world in general, the silence keeps you company as you turn the page of the book about exotic animals on the table of what used to be the prison dining room. You had already read that book a couple of times, but the words silence the thoughts in your head, loud words capable of driving the sanest person crazy, those voices that were only your own fear of dying in the most grotesque way possible. You had already seen how the walkers destroyed the skin, making their way through as if it were chewing gum, images that played in your head when it was time to sleep, and for that very reason, you no longer slept much.
But just when a sharp pain in your lower back begins to throb and your hand finds that region, you hear someone's footsteps before seeing Daryl at the entrance.
“Hey. I thought ya were sleepin'.” He says, approaching, always in that low, hoarse voice. “Ya okay?”
“Yeah, my back hurts a little.”
Daryl sits down on the long iron chair, his legs on either side.
“Why? And don’t tell me s'cause yer gettin' old.”
You chuckle.
“It’s nothing…” Your hand leaves that area, only to pretend it doesn’t hurt like it does now. “During the time this started I went through a tin roof while Sam and I were escaping a horde of walkers. After the pain and the shock, it was pretty funny actually. I just... disappeared!” You laugh, earning a snort from him because he didn’t find that memory all that funny. “Luckily I landed on my back and not on my knees.”
“Turn around.” He says, seriously.
You frown, looking at him in confusion.
“Why?”
“Woman, jus' turn around.” You turn around in the chair, placing one leg on the other side so your back is facing him. You can guess what he’s about to do, but knowing doesn’t slow down your heart rate when you feel the contact of his fingers on your shirt, right in the area where Sam said he always put his hand. “Here?”
“Yeah.” Your back arches slightly under the pain, but at the same time, the pressure he exerts is pleasurable. For a moment, silence reigns in the room, and while it’s not awkward, because you enjoyed his silence as much as hearing his voice, you have to clear your throat to make any noise other than your heartbeat. “You’re not doing this to get into my pants, are you?”
Daryl chuckles.
“Dun think ya’ll let me get in there ever again.”
You chuckle.
“Nope. You’re banned from that place forever.”
When his hands leave your body after a while, you turn back around, but the thanks you’re about to give him get stuck in your throat when he speaks again.
“Where’s yer flying rat?”
The sarcasm in his voice makes you roll your eyes.
“I don’t know, I guess she went out to eat, but if you’re good maybe Aeris will bring you a squirrel for you to eat in a stew.”
Daryl snorts, but you know him too well to know that he wants to laugh.
“I’ve never eaten falcon.” The corner of his lip curls into a smile.
You laugh sarcastically, because even though you know he’s joking, Aeris is a daughter to you.
“Do something to her, and this time it’ll be a bullet that hits your forehead and not a peach.”
You stand up, closing the book, ending the conversation, but before you can take a step, Daryl's hand closes around yours, stopping you.
“Peach, hey, I was jus’ messin’ with ya.”
You can see the worry on his face, and hear the apologies in the way his deep voice turns soft, but the more he looks at you, the more it feels like you might sink into a new kind of ocean.
“I know.” You nod, smiling slightly to reassure him. “I was just going to wait for her outside. Do you want to go or do you have something more important to do?”
The relief in his eyes is clear, transparent in the way his gaze softens as Daryl stands up. You two walk in silence for a moment, but it feels like the night breeze can bring back old memories, old feelings, an echo that you can only hear in your ears.
And for some reason, it feels like going back to the beginning where you two were only strangers, because when you read a story from its first page, the characters are presented as two different worlds, as travelers who venture to explore unknown territory, and when they meet, for the first time, it’s like witnessing the collision of two universes. But no one teaches you the risks of falling in love.
“I, uh…” You think deeply about your next words, and if it’s okay to say them out loud, but when he looks at you intently, it’s like the night brings back memories of when your mom died and he was there for you, all the time. “I’m so sorry about Merle, Daryl. I saw the cross outside with his name on it.”
Daryl mourns his brother’s death, but he can’t help but remember the best, colorful memories of the times he shared with you, which are turning blue inside him, because in that moment of loneliness when Merle left, Daryl wanted nothing more than to be with you.
“Thanks, peach.”
But as time mercilessly pursues you two and prevents you from falling into a deeper conversation like the night outside the prison, your gazes turn towards the terrifying scene in front of the two of you the moment the door connecting to the outside opens. On the left side of the place, the outer gate falls under the weight of the horde of walkers, and although the second inner gate stops them for a few minutes, it won’t be enough.
“Hey! Rick!” Daryl is only a few steps away from him and a young boy with a sheriff hat, and Rick turns around showing his own fear as time runs out. “We need to use the guns, s’the only way.”
He nods, quickly.
“Okay, Daryl says you know how to shoot, right, (Y/N)?” You nod too, and he runs a few steps back to the pile of guns in a large canvas box. His breathing is ragged, just like the others as Rick hands a long gun to the young boy, doing the same with you as Daryl takes one on his own, each of you filling your pockets with ammunition. “Carl, (Y/N), magazine goes in here. Release is here. Make sure it latches. Pull back the operating rod and rounds feed up. Keep squeezing the trigger for rapid fire, okay?” As Rick takes the lead while he explains the workings of the weapon, he takes a second to lean over the boy. “You fire or you run. Don’t let them get close. Okay?”
The moment the gate finally falls and the first walkers take the first step towards you all, time gives Daryl a second to look at you.
“I’ll be fine.” You say quietly before looking ahead.
In the no longer so silent night, the sound of incessant gunfire resonates, taking down the first row of walkers who fall forever this time, silencing their grunts as you all do the same with the next group and the one behind. The tail of the gun hits you in the shoulder, a bump each time you fire a bullet that hits the heads of those who used to be normal people, with normal jobs, being someone else’s family. But it’s funny how the suffocating situation still allows you to remember how your dad exercised that paternal authority over you, always doing what he wanted you to do, but as the last walkers finally return to the land where they belong, you can’t help but give a silent thank you to the man who, unknowingly, saved your life in that new world.
When the last walker is shot down and the last bullet is fired, silence falls over everyone like a foggy night.
“Ya okay, peach?” You feel Daryl’s hand on your shoulder, and it’s like waking up from a trance under the warmth of his fingers.
“Uh? Yeah.” You nod at him while, above your head, you hear the sounds Aeris makes before landing on your shoulder.
“Shit. Is that a falcon?”
The moment the young boy turns to check that everyone is okay, his eyes stop on Aeris, admiring her in fascination.
Rick chuckles.
“(Y/N), this is my son Carl. Carl, this is (Y/N), Daryl's…”
It’s confusing for everyone.
“I’m not related to this man, not at all…” You shake your head, pointing at him, so seriously that you hear Daryl snort. “It’s a pleasure, Carl. This is Aeris.”
“That's cool. And she’s beautiful.” He smiles.
And between that thick feeling of terror and confusion, it’s almost funny and sad to see the innocence in a young man who surely learned to shoot to protect his life and others.
A few hours later and in the farthest part of the prison where the sick were quarantined, everyone finally got a break from danger as the dead came back to life in that place too. Now, in the solitude of your own cell, sitting on the edge of the small bed, it’s endearingly awkward the way Daryl silently enters, trying to get closer to you. But for a moment, it’s as if you both need a minute to contemplate with different eyes what just happened, the constant game of tug-of-war with death, surviving one more day.
“Ya okay?” He asks, his voice low. “Ya look a little shocked.”
You take a deep breath, trying to let go of the bad feelings.
“Yeah, it’s just… I never believed, not for a second, that the way my dad forced me to learn how to shoot was going to save my life one day. And at this point in my life, I know well how to shoot, but I never imagined I’d actually have to.”
Daryl nods, but when the ocean depths in his eyes stare at you, you fear what he might say.
“Can ya stay?” It’s a question, but it sounds like a plea that makes you hold your breath. “Ya and Sam can stay here. We can… find a way to bring yer new grandparents over.”
His words are tender, but something stops you from saying yes.
“Mark’s not going to leave his home. I know him, and asking him will only make him feel like a burden, and I don’t want to put him through that. Thank you, really… I really appreciate what you did for Sam. You and everyone here.” When you look back at him, you think of the times you told yourself that if you fell too deep into his gaze, you’d just have to swim back to the surface. “I’m glad to know you found a family, but this isn’t my place, Daryl.”
Daryl has to look away when his fears threaten to overwhelm him, but they are enough to fill the emptiness of the world.
“Try to sleep, peach.”
And coldly, he leaves.
But when morning comes, it all happens in the blink of an eye.
The man with the eye patch kills Hershel without any remorse in front of his daughters and the group, his new family, and then, there are gunshots and injuries when a battle breaks out, fire and explosions, and a tank knocking down the gate and letting the walkers in. Out of focus, like being outside your own head and body: one by one, behind a wall, you shoot those who try to shoot you and the people around. But the big group disperses into small ones, the injured and the children, and there are screams everywhere, words you can't make out over the repetitive sound of the bullets. From somewhere in the distance, you hear Sam's voice, but it's like the wind is pushing it through you and into the smoke, getting lost forever.
But there are too many walkers for you alone, and in your own escape plan, while taking down the man who got out of the tank and others trying to get away, you find Daryl just as he shoots another guy in the head with an arrow.
“Daryl…”
He's out of breath when he turns around, but the surrender in his gaze is overwhelming.
“Peach, we need to go.”
You take one last look at the fallen prison, nodding as you look back at him.
But once far away and with a full view of the place, the sight is heartbreaking, lonely despite all the walkers that begin to enter the prison. Fire and smoke are the only things you hope are left in the ruined place, an image that sticks in your memory as you begin to turn your back to enter the forest.
The ammunition in your pockets weighs like you’re carrying lead, but with a shaking hand against your lips and a whistle traveling through the place, the pressure in your chest is released slightly as Aeris’s voice echoes, until the moment she lands on your shoulder.
“Peach, hey, we need a plan, okay?” Daryl’s hand stops you.
“I have a plan…” You turn to him, the gun still in your hand and your breathing ragged, hot in your chest like you have a fever, but you want to believe it’s because of the strength you used to run there, and not because of the fear of losing your family. “Ellie didn’t answer last night when I tried to talk to her on the walkie-talkie, and she always answers. I want to believe that Sam is okay, that she will be able to protect herself with the little I was able to teach her all this time, but Ellie doesn’t know how.”
However, when you try to turn around again, Daryl stops you when he steps in front of you.
“Can ya wait a damn minute?” He breathes through slightly parted lips, his chest rising and falling at an abnormal pace. “It took us a whole day to get here from the city, and ya want to walk back there? Are ya crazy, woman?”
In that moment, you feel like circumstances have put back that concrete wall that life once put between the two of you when you parted, and it’s then that the world regains sound when you realize that this could be the end. So, gathering courage, you dare to look deeply into his eyes because you no longer have time to be afraid, because heartless time has finally caught up with you.
“Maybe I am a little crazy…” You try to laugh, but your smile falters. “You know something? I once told you that I was trying to find my place in the old world we lived in, to do something useful with my life so that it would have meaning the day I die, and I think now is the time. I don’t care if it takes me a week or a month, I’m going to get to them. You can do whatever you want, anyway, that’s what you always do…”
The moment you start walking, Daryl knows again that falling for you years ago was forbidden, like biting the apple of discord every night in which, secretly, you two enjoyed clandestine encounters, because the desire to be together was like fire inside him, and you, you were going to be the only person for whom he was going to fall in love deeply, he knew it and he would know it forever.
“Ya don’t know why I broke up with ya.”
With a broken smile, you try to push the memories of that night to the back of your mind, because, in a constant struggle between your mind and your heart, that last one wanted to believe that you two could have worked out despite the fears and insecurities.
“So what? Do you want to tell me now?”
The air of the world doesn’t seem enough to reach the emptiness that your departure left in his chest, but now, Daryl knows that he will follow you to the end of the world, or to hell itself if necessary. So, with a grunt that masks his feelings, Daryl starts walking in your direction, muttering under his breath before continuing on.
“Ya are insufferable sometimes, woman.” As he passes you, you chuckle as you start walking in the same direction. “If anythin' happens to us, we’re eatin’ yer rat.”
And among that world that tries to continually tear you down, slowly kill you, you find a small spark of hope among the ruins.
Or so you thought.
@fluffy-dixon
@stunkbiggu
@kurogxrix
#daryl dixon imagine#daryl dixon x reader#daryl x y/n#daryl dixon twd#daryl dixon x y/n#daryl dixon#daryl dixon fanfiction
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Broken bat
Azriel x f!Reader
Summary; Reader is in love with Azriel but he is with Elain, so she decides to accept Beron's proposition and marry Eris.
Warnings; angst, swearing, mentions of blood.
Masterlist
Stars filled the sky in Velaris as the night settled in. You were sitting next to the window in your room, staring outside wondering how the hell you ended up in this situation. Your cousin Rhysand had invited you in his office to talk about a proposition from the Autumn court, Beron wanted you to marry his son Eris in order to maintain a peaceful relationship with the night court. You gaped at Rhysand not believing that your cousin was even thinking about it.
“It’s your choice, I don’t mind if you don’t want to do this but it is my duty to inform you about this” he had said. You knew Eris, you spent some time together a few months ago when you visited the winter court as Rhysand’s emissary. Eris was there to talk about some dispute between the Autumn and Winter courts. He was an arrogant male, nothing unusual for a high lord’s heir but he was also funny, and kind when he felt like it. It sure wouldn’t be a bad thing if he became your husband. You could think way worse potential marriages. You needed to think this through so you asked Rhysand to give you some time and he respected your wish.
The main reason behind your uncertainty was the stunning shadowsinger. You had been pinning after him for ages yet he completely ignored you.
You clenched your jaw at the thought and shut your eyes. Maybe marrying Eris was for the best, you could learn to love him and even forget about Azriel.
Dinner would be served soon so you gathered all your courage and walked to the dinning room. Everyone was already there and to your relief the seat next to the shadowsinger was taken by Elain leaving the opposite one free.
Any other night it would have bothered you but tonight you couldn’t sit next to him.
You stood in front of the empty seat and with a deep breath said “I have an announcement to make”. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at you, you felt those hazel eyes on you and gulped.
“Rhysand informed me about a proposition from the Autumn court, in order to make amends for the past and to create a peaceful relationship between the courts I am to be married to Eris”.
Everyone was gaping at you. Taking a seat, you filled your plate with food trying to avoid everyone’s gaze on you.
“Like hell you are” Azriel growled. You looked at him wide-eyed.
“It’s her decision to make Az” Rhysand replied for you.
“This is Eris we’re talking about” Azriel’s voice was rising with each word making Rhys glare at him.
“Why do you care?” Your question surprised everyone even the shadowsinger.
“Because you are Rhysand’s cousin and that makes us family too”.
You scoffed at this and got up.
“I lost my appetite, excuse me” you left the room. You heard footsteps behind you and rolled your eyes, before you could close your bedroom’s door scarred arms pushed it making you grunt.
“What do you want Azriel, I’m really not in the mood for a fight”.
He entered and slammed the door shut.
“What were you thinking when you accepted?” His eyes frantically searching your own. He wanted to read you, and this was something he was good at, so you kept your gaze on the floor.
“Eris isn’t that bad, and the marriage could be very beneficial for our court” your voice was calm “also I don’t have a reason to stay”
“What about Rhys and Mor? Your cousins need you”
“No they don’t.” You shrugged.
“What about me?” His voice was barely above a whisper.
You glanced at him “what about you?”
“I need you” he confessed, his hazel eyes staring deep into your own searching for any emotion.
“Az what do you mean?” You could swear your heart was about to explode.
He walked up to you, his eyes never leaving your own. He cupped your jaw and glanced at your lips “please stay” and with that he captured your lips with his own. The kiss was needy, his other hand moving behind your head and pushing you further into him. Your brain stopped working for a moment and then it hit you, you pushed him off and panted.
“No, you don’t get to do this. You don’t get to fucking do this, not with Elain in the other room” tears filled your eyes and you felt like you couldn’t breathe.
“I…” he began but stopped, a guilty expression on his face.
“Get out.” He just stared at you. “Get. The. Fuck. Out.” And you lost it, you picked everything you could find and threw it on the wall screaming “Get out… get out… get out”.
Your door flew open, Cassian was standing there his eyes frantically scanning the room, Rhysand behind him with a dagger in hand. Azriel was pale, he couldn’t move as he watched you destroy your room. Cassian grabbed him and pulled him out while Rhys cautiously approached you.
“I hate him… I fucking hate him” you cried out.
“Shh it’s okay” Rhysand hugged you. “Talk to Beron, the sooner we have the wedding the better.” You whispered.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
You were getting ready for your wedding, Mor, Nesta, Amren and Feyre were running around barking orders and making sure everything was perfect. You glanced at the mirror, Beron had picked your wedding dress, and it was clear that he wanted to make a statement. The dress was even more extravagant than Feyre’s, you didn’t think it was possible, but you were wrong. You didn’t even know if you could fit through the door. “That thing is hideous” Amren spoke. Everyone nodded in agreement and before you could reply Elain burst into your room, her face filled with tears and panic.
“Azriel broke up with me, he was drunk and… and he left and then I heard Eris saying that he got in a fight with someone, and he is hurt.” She was sobbing.
You gasped “Where is he?” “It’s your fault” Elain screamed.
“Elain I swear if you don’t tell me where he is….” You were interrupted by someone walking in, not just someone but your future husband. Eris stared at you and amusement filled his eyes.
“Are you wearing our wedding cake?” he teased earning a scoff. “You look terrible darling” he continued. “You know its bad luck to see the bride before the wedding” Nesta spoke.
“I know but I think that the broken and completely drunk bat in my room belongs to her.” He said with a bored look. “What is he doing in your room?” you asked.
“He was hurt, and I think he wanted to beat me up, but he passed out the moment he walked in. Anyway, please come get your bat and spare me from this horrible wedding.” He turned to walk out “and burn this thing it’s hideous”. And with that he was gone.
You glanced at Feyre who nodded, and you ran, the dress was banging against tables, destroying everything on the way but you didn’t care.
You burst into Eris’ room and there he was; on the ground covered in blood, his hair a mess and his wings tense. You kneeled next to him and caressed his head “Az..” he opened his eyes and stared at you. You didn’t know what to say so you just grabbed his jaw and kissed him. “I love you” he whispered. “I know… I love you too”
Currently working on two requests one about Azriel and one about Cassian, I will post them as soon as I finish them. Requests are open
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