#and he's obviously got a lot of other things going on with him. i do think that his rockstar coolness perfectionism and tantrums are all

[ts-janus-rp-blog]

"You're welcome... I just...didn't wanna spook you. I... Yeah! I wanted to know your professional opinion of the matter and see if we could come to some sort of... I don't know, arrangement? Considering before I got you we were just yelling at each other and I could tell it wasn't getting anywhere. I'm just...sorry I didn't leave the room again to get angry..." Remus wrapped his arms around Emile and nuzzled into his shoulder. He placed a kiss on his cheek again before pausing when he felt something. He glanced down and chuckled at seeing the smaller one. "Hey... I kinda forgot you guys are still here..." He reached down to pet him too. "So... Uh... What are we gonna do with them, do you think? We're obviously not gonna use them for sex, so like..."

"He's dumb enough to fall for it. I don't know about his boyfriend though, he may not. I reckon though if you make sure he's not in the room then you're good to go." Logan replied back as he continued to type away.

"Yeah, that's going to take some time though. But that's what I'm going to do...most likely for the rest of the night. I'll inform you about my results in the morning. Huh... You know, I didn't think about it that way, but that would work too. You'll get him pregnant when he's completely in love with you so it'll make it seem like it was a miracle. He may fall in love with you even harder if that's the case. Yeah, that's also what I'm gonna do with the infertile hybrids. There's a lot of testing I need to do." Logan finally sighed deeply, he closed his eyes as he took off his glasses. "So, how did the call really go?" Logan glanced over to Virgil, "You're awfully quiet about the subject, that's not like you at all. Normally after you talk to Remus you come in here smashing things and yelling about him."

Patton knocked desperately at the strangers door, praying someone, anyone was home. His heart beat as fast and loud as the rain thundering against the sidewalk. He was sure he was being followed, they were going to catch him. They were going to drag him back. He wasn't sure if whoever lived here might be worse, but he was willing to risk it at this point. Anything to escape.

{@moralpuppylover2}

Janus didn't know who would be at the door. It was late, but his master won't surely be home at this time. He normally doesn't get home until the sun starts to come up.

So, as the dog hybrid walked up to the door and opened it, he wondered who it could be. And if he should open it at all... Who knows, he may get in trouble with his master for opening the door. But, his curiosity was getting the better of him-

He stopped when he saw the soaking wet cat standing at the doorway. He could tell that this cat needed help almost immediately. Well, if his poor state of clothes were anything to go by. His eyes flickered up and down the sidewalk before he grabbed pattons arm and pulled him inside.

"are you alright?" Janus nervously asked as he grabbed a towel from the mud room. "Well, that's a stupid question, of course you're not alright! Are you...running away from your owners?" As Janus walked, the collar around his neck would jingle loudly. And even though it was cold outside and even in the house, he only had a pair of boxers on. Because of that, Patton would be able to see the numerous large scars that covered his body...and the countless amounts of fresh bruises.

@moralpuppylover2

[ckret2]

due to stuff involving a goat, the only thing that can save the pines family is sticking bill cipher in a cute dress, doing weird 70's things to his hair, slapping makeup on him, and sending him to flirt with a government agent

and if that ain't a setup for a chapter i don't know what is

anyway here's chapter 86 of this thing.

####

"Something about this is just wrong," Stan said. "It isn't natural."

"Oh, I don't know," Ford said, grinning. "I think it's funny."

Without looking over, trying not to move his lips, Bill said, "I'd like to see you do better."

It was still a few minutes until the Mystery Shack opened for the day, and he and Mabel were sitting in the kitchen, with Bill miserably wearing a mis-buttoned Hawaiian shirt so he wouldn't mess up his makeup when he changed into his flirting uniform. The makeup supplies Pacifica had sent them home with yesterday were spread out on the kitchen table, and they were collaboratively trying to remember how to recreate the look Pacifica had given Bill yesterday. Thus far, they'd managed moisturizer and foundation and were debating the finer points of concealer color theory.

"I didn't say it's bad," said Ford, whose opinions on makeup only fell into three categories: obviously hideous; fine, I guess; and potentially magical sigils for ritual purposes. "It's just bizarre watching you care about it."

Bill mumbled, "I'm blending in with the Nacirema." Ford barked a laugh. (About time somebody got it.)

Stan elbowed Ford. "What's a Nacirema?"

"It's— There's this phenomenon in anthropology— I'll explain it later."

Stan grumbled to himself about the nerds enabling each other, then said, "Hey. When you do the lipstick, don't make it look too good. If it looks too good, he'll assume you're out of his league and get suspicious when you start hitting on him. I never trust attention from a lady whose lipstick isn't at least a little cakey."

Offended, Mabel said, "Grunkle Stan, I'm an artiste! I can't do a bad job on purpose!"

Bill said, "It doesn't matter! Once I get my seduction hat on, he won't even glance at my face." He poked the top hat sitting on the kitchen table.

"Oh, no you don't," Stan said. "Hat's gotta go, it's too tall. Guys hate it when their dates are taller than them."

"What?!" Bill stared at Stan, aghast. "You've gotta be insane! The hat's essential—"

"Hold still!" Mabel poked his neck with the butt of a makeup brush.

He reluctantly gave up and turned to face her again, but not without muttering to himself, "Can't wear a seduction hat, can't stick my hand in a goat's stomach acid, god forbid women do anything."

Last night's hunt for Gompers had been an abysmal failure—Dipper and Mabel had never even glimpsed him. This morning, beneath the banter, there was a somber air in the room; the household was trying not to think about the fact that their collective safety was resting on Bill's ability to seem appealing to a normal man in spite of the fact that they were having a conversation, and he wasn't even able to convincingly pretend he had a plan.

Dipper was trying to get breakfast around Bill and Mabel. Once Mabel had puffed on a layer of setting powder, Bill twisted around to give Dipper an unnecessarily wide smile. "Hey! How do I look?"

He glanced up from pouring a bowl of cereal and grimaced. "Somehow even less like a real human than usual."

Bill laughed. "Yep, it's the lack of pores." He turned away to check his mirror as he applied his mascara.

Mabel said, "He'll look better once we get the lipstick on."

Soos ducked in from the living room. "Hey, uh, guys?" It was clear he'd been as distracted that morning as the rest of them; he'd misbuttoned his suit jacket. "I just saw the government dudes' car again. Like, in the parking lot this time, not lurking down the street."

The energy in the air changed, like a subtle electric current shooting through the room. "Okay, enough gawking at the freak show," Stan said. "Ford?"

"Right!" He grabbed up his coffee mug, re-thought it, and poured the mug back in the coffee pot and picked up the pot instead, then bolted from the kitchen. He returned a moment later with his arms loaded with his journal, several books, and a couple of guns that would definitely be illegal on Earth if Earth had ever heard they existed. "Basement."

Bill turned toward the doorway so fast Mabel almost smeared lipstick across his cheek. Basement? He hoped Ford meant his study. If they went all the way to the basement, and noticed that somebody had been moving around the rubble of the portal...

"Bill!" Mabel said.

"I know, I know." He turned back to her again.

A final line, and Mabel sighed in relief. "Okay, you're good."

Stan rummaged through the fridge for the first thing he could find to sustain himself and Ford for the day. "Hey, demon. Remember everything I taught you."

"Yeah, yeah," Bill sighed. "Don't claim I have a job he can fact-check, don't pretend I make more money than him unless I want him to invite me to a fancy restaurant and pretend he forgot his wallet, if he asks my age I'm fifteen years younger than him, my human family lives across the country, I don't have any sisters that might be prettier, and there's nothing I wanna hear about more than World War 2 battle tactics or vintage car repair or whatever hobby he's picked up to make himself feel more masculine."

"And?" Mabel prompted.

"And my favorite animal is cats, my favorite color is pink, my favorite flavor is chocolate, my favorite film genre is not slapstick snuff, my favorite time to get married is next week, and my favorite body part on a partner is their eyes still inside their sockets, but if I specify the socket part it'll worry him."

"Right! Gold star!" She smacked a sticker onto his shirt.

Stan clapped a hand on his shoulder. "Knock 'im dead," he said. "Not literally. Unless you're sure the other two won't catch you."

"I'll see what I can do," Bill said.

####

The three agents eyed the sign that had been set up outside the Mystery Shack's main door. It said, "Self-guided tour today! $15" and there was a cardboard box taped beneath with a slit cut in the lid.

Agent Dale said, "Do you think that's for us?"

"Probably not," Trigger said uncertainly. "We have a warrant."

"Huh." Dale reread the sign, then tentatively rummaged through his pocket for his wallet and pulled out three fives. Trigger pushed his hand back down.

Soos ran around the side of the shack, breathing heavily. "Oh, wow! What a... totally random coincidence... running into you guys again..." He put his hands on his knees, huffing. "Gimme a sec. I was... running pretty fast... for no reason."

"Mr. Ramirez," Powers said. He held out a search warrant. "We're here to search this building for missing government property."

"Oh, dude, that's crazy," Soos said. "Do you like, have evidence that this property is in the building? Like, I don't know, any kind of... signal that it's giving off, maybe? That confirms it's here?"

Powers turned to Dale. He pulled his tablet out to check. "Uhhh... negative, sir. We're nnnot detecting the signal we picked up yesterday."

Powers frowned. "Hmm."

Trigger said, "Maybe the signal's... on the fritz?"

"Good point," Powers said. "We'd better search anyway. Dale, you start in the museum; Trigger, come with me to the back. I'll interview Mr. Ramirez." He gave Soos a sharp look. "And I hope you'll have more to say today than that you don't know anything."

Soos swallowed hard.

####

From the living room couch, Soos called to Trigger, "Be careful with the stuff in here, okay? This old shack's full of priceless antiques and authentic exotic curios. I glued half of them together myself!"

"So." Powers took a seat in one of the armchairs, opened an unlabeled manila folder and propped it on his knee, and clicked out a retractable pen. "Jesús Ramirez, correct? You prefer 'Soos'?"

"Yep, that's right," Soos said. "When I started school, my cousin Reggie, he'd yell at me across the cafeteria to sit with him, like, 'Jesús!' But some of the kids in my grade thought he was saying, 'hey, Soos!' And it stuck."

Powers nodded slowly. "I... see. And, you're the head of the household."

"Yup! That's me!"

"Property records say that the house is owned by 'Stanford Pines'?"

"Uhhh, yeah," Soos said. "He kinda, stepped down as head of the house, unofficially, and I'm running the house now. Also the business."

"And where is Stanford Pines right now?"

"Oh, he's out." (They had agreed that under no circumstances could the agents talk to Stan, lest something from last summer come up; and they definitely couldn't talk to the real Stanford Pines, whom they already knew as a mysterious superior officer from Washington.)

"When will he be back?"

Soos hesitated. "Ooout of the country. World traveling. Yeah, haha, he's been doing that for the past year with his brother."

Powers flipped a couple pages forward in his file. "His brother Sherman? Who lives in New Jersey?"

"No no, his other brother."

His other brother who died thirty years ago?"

Soos paused. "Uhhh..."

Dale ducked into the living room. "Sirs—I've found something interesting. You have to come see this."

Powers got to his feet, closing his folder and tucking it under his arm. "Excuse me." He followed his agents.

Soos heaved a sigh of relief.

"Wow, Questiony,—you were this close to collapsing like a house of cards."

Bill sauntered down the stairs. He was in a dress covered in yellowy-orangey triangles that managed, for the first time all summer, to reveal that he did in fact have curves, and he'd grabbed a set of green triangular clip-on earrings from Mabel's jewelry. A gold star sticker had been stuck on one of the earrings. Soos thought it was kinda weird to look at him all dressed up, with hair and everything. Bill looked like if Bill had a sister.

"Man," Soos said, slumping back into the couch. "I don't know if I can take another round of that. They're using some kind of government interrogation mind tricks."

"Relax," Bill said. "I'll take it from here."

He shut one eye and shot Soos a pair of finger guns as he backed into the gift shop, and twirled around to go pursue his prey.

####

Dale jogged through the gift shop, nodding to a couple of tourists as he passed—"Morning, ladies"—and ducked through the "employees only" door. A moment later, all three agents jogged into the museum. An older woman asked, "Why are so many handsome men in suits running around?"

As Bill let himself into the gift shop, he said, "Secret government agents! They're here investigating a conspiracy."

"Oh my," the woman gushed. "Isn't that exciting!"

"They'll only be here today! See if you can get their autographs!" Bill leaned on the front counter. "Hey, nice to see you back. You were missed yesterday."

Melody gave him an irritated look from behind the register.

"Surprised you came in, after how you felt yesterday!" In part because Soos was attempting to get as many people away from the shack and out of the danger zone as possible. He'd told Wendy she could take the day off, he'd persuaded Abuelita to go visit Reggie and his wife, and he'd tried to talk the kids into hanging out somewhere else for the day and only relented when they argued that their plucky 13-year-old adventuring expertise could be useful if things took a turn for the worse. Surely, he'd asked his fiancée to stay home too; strange that she hadn't. "Word is you're having trouble sleeping. Bad dreams? If it is, I could help you out. I happen to be an expert on—"

"I don't want your help." Her voice was a lot more venomous than Bill had expected.

He blinked in surprise. He knew she wasn't his biggest fan, but that seemed unnecessarily hostile. "Whoa, just offering! Don't bite my head off. Those don't grow back."

Melody sighed. "Sorry," she said insincerely, looking away from him. "I just... This whole plan bothers me. Flirting with some poor guy just to distract him."

Don't lie to a liar, girl. Something else was bothering her. Still, Bill only said, "Do you have a better plan?"

"Yeah? Just don't do anything suspicious and make sure Gompers stays away from the shack until the agents get bored and leave."

Bill scoffed. "And if they don't get bored?"

"Why wouldn't they?"

"Why would they? This town's got gnomes, fairies, and a crashed spaceship."

"Well—yeah, but, that's not a reason to focus on the shack."

"Never underestimate what the government will chuck tax dollars at without a good reason!"

Melody huffed, "Okay, fine. I still don't like it."

Yeah, Bill bet she didn't. Especially with the Bureau of Covert Investigations here looking for someone dangerous.

Okay—he'd given the eagles enough of a head start for it to look natural when he casually bumped into them. He straightened up, stretched, and sauntered toward the museum's curtain. "I won't ask you to wish me luck—" he lifted one wrist toward Melody and shook the bracelet covered in evil eye beads that Mabel had given him, "—just don't wish me ill." And then he followed the agents into the museum.

####

"Here it is," Dale said, stopping. "What do you make of this?"

He was standing in front of the museum's taxidermy Sascrotch display.

Trigger covered his mouth, trying to hold back a snort of laughter.

Dale grinned. "It's pretty great, right?"

Powers looked the Sascrotch up and down. "I don't get it."

"Heeey, secret agent man!" Bill swept into the museum and leaned against the wall, head propped against his hand, other hand on his cocked hip. "Imagine meeting you three days in a row, what a coincidence! I'm starting to feel like you're following me around."

Powers looked at Bill—and then started a little. (Not used to seeing him with his eyes emphasized properly, no doubt.) His cheeks immediately turned pink. Flustered, he stammered awkwardly for a moment before getting out, "I—I—Pardon me, I can assure you, you're not under investigation—" Dale and Trigger exchanged a glance and tried not to grin.

"Hey, whoa! I didn't mean it in a bad way." He flashed Powers his best smile. (He'd practiced in the mirror. Mabel had given him tips on not making it too wide.) "Say, since I was lucky enough to see you again, I've got a question for you, secret agent man."

"Yes?"

Bill batted his long, gorgeous lashes at Powers. "Do you believe in love at first sight, or am I gonna have to arrange a fourth meeting?"

"Uhh." Powers's already stellar posture somehow found a way to straighten a little bit more. "The first three times were more than sufficient, ma'am."

"Haha, you charmer!" All right, maybe Mabel had had a point about not opening up with a line about eyeballs. Still, this would be a cinch. Bill had been manipulating humans for millennia, and flirting was no different. Slipping into this role felt natural. He was in his element. He was good at this. He'd have this guy eating out of his hand in an hour.

Dale and Trigger looked at each other again, and Dale said, "Sir, maybe Trigger and I should search the house. You can take the museum."

"Maybe you could interview the locals," Trigger threw in, before they beat a hasty retreat.

"Ho—hold on!" Powers said; but his agents had already abandoned him. What terrific wingmen. Not the best agents, maybe.

"Sooo," Bill said, "if you aren't here to see me, what brings you by this old dump of a tourist trap again? It can't be the displays." He tugged out the waistband of Sascrotch's briefs with a finger and let go, letting it snap back against its waist; a small cloud of dust puffed out of the fur. "Still looking for some dangerous character?"

"No, not at the moment. Nothing you need to worry about," Powers said. "We're here looking for some... sensitive objects?"

"Oh? What kind of sensitive objects?" Bill asked. "I've been to this little tourist trap a few times, maybe I can help find 'em?"

"I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to say."

"What, you don't think you can trust me?" Bill batted his lashes. That had been working pretty well for him so far. (The mascara had to be helping. Man, was he glad to have mascara again.)

Powers avoided making eye contact. "I"m sure you're very trustworthy. But—it would be an embarrassment to the bureau, you understand."

"Sure! Sure." Billl's smile wilted slightly. "Well—I'm sure you wouldn't mind if I just watch, would you? I've never seen a real federal investigation in action—seems exciting."

Powers hesitated, his professionalism warring with his very obvious crush. "I... suppose I wouldn't mind." Sure, like he wasn't utterly flattered.

As Powers's inspection took him around the museum and back into the gift shop, he said, "You said your name was Goldie? I don't think I ever got your last name."

Oh he'd better not be planning on a background check. "It's Locke—and yes, I've already heard every comment about it you can imagine."

Powers gave him a quizzical look. "I believe you told us to inform Mr. Gleeful that a 'Mr. Locke' had recommended we purchase a car from him?"

He had said that, hadn't he. If he'd known two days ago he'd have to femme up for this guy... "Sure! I happen to be related to a lot of Mr. Lockes!" Before Powers could pry into this family Bill had just invented, he hurried on: "Say, I never got your name, did I!" Did he? Since he already knew it, he couldn't remember if he'd bothered to ask.

"Of course—I'm Agent Powers."

"Is 'Agent' your first name, handsome?"

Powers flushed a little more, and he mumbled, "Manny."

"Manny Powers?" Bill casually slid between Powers and the vending machine to keep him from looking too close at it. "Like, 'manpower'?"

"Precisely," Powers said. "Obviously, that's... not my real name, just my assigned codename for field assignments."

Bill laughed, "Hey, not bad! 'Manpower,' that's pretty funny."

"Is it?" Powers asked. "Hm. It isn't supposed to be. I'll have to speak with HQ about that."

Bill pressed his lips together. Tell him he's funny, Bill! Guys love it when you tell them how funny they are! Last time hetook advice from a human on anything. He shot an exasperated look toward Melody, who winced in what he hoped was sympathy.

Trigger ducked into the gift shop. "Sir? I think we've found something. Really, this time."

Powers's attention snapped to him. "Show me."

Bill maintained his position until the agents were gone; and then he let out a long, frustrated sigh. He glanced at Melody. "How are we doing?"

She grimaced. "I'd give it... three out of five stars?"

"You're generous, I appreciate that." He nearly rubbed his eyelids in irritation, and only the sight of his red fingernails reminded him of his makeup in time to stop.

In his heart of hearts, Bill felt like he should have already won by now—but then, he'd always hated waiting for things. Usually he could force patience on himself by finding a peephole that would let him see further into the future so he could tell exactly when his latest plan would succeed. In this body, he couldn't see any farther than a few minutes, and he didn't have any eyes he could look through but his own. Like this, he didn't even know whether he'd succeed.

Except of course he would. Of course. He always did. He didn't need to check. He had until the agents left to make some real progress, and that was plenty of time. He'd figure this out.

He almost backed into the living room, remembered at the last second that he didn't want Melody to know about his door ignoring trick, and said flatly, "Door." Melody reluctantly left her station to help open it.

In the living room, Dale was standing on top of the table, which he'd dragged over in front of the TV, and attempting to pry a board out of the ceiling with a crowbar. He asked Soos, "You're sure you don't have a stepladder somewhere?"

"Uh-uh," Soos said. He was hovering in the doorway, wringing his hands together. "It's against the house rules."

"We picked up a faint radio signal," Trigger explained to Powers. "Like from a walkie-talkie with a dying battery, or..."

"Ah-ha!" Dale pulled a gray blocky object out of a space over the ceiling. It appeared to be a radio: it had an antenna, a speaker, a couple of glowing lights flickering on the brink of going out... and a large Bureau of Covert Investigations seal stamped on the front. The eagle peering through the magnifying glass seemed as surprised to see them as they were to see it. "Is... is this one of our transmitters?"

Powers blinked at it in amazement. "What in the Sam Hill is one of our transmitters doing in this building!" He directed the question toward Soos.

Soos flinched. "How should I know, I didn't know this place was bugged! I would've unbugged it if I knew." He paused. "Unless that's a federal crime or something. In which case forget I said that."

"We're the guys that oughta know about it," Dale said, shrugging cluelessly. "Since it's one of ours. Weird."

Powers held his hand out for the transmitter, examined it, and turned it over. On the back a strip of black label-maker tape read, "GOVERNMENT PROPERTY! IF LOST, PLEASE RETURN TO AGENT TRIGGER."

Powers and Dale turned to Trigger.

He looked between them, baffled. "Wh— Well, I didn't put it there! I would've remembered putting it there." He frowned. "I mean... I should remember putting it there."

Powers's lips were pressed so flat together they were almost invisible beneath his mustache. "Well. Obviously, we ought to take it back."

Tentatively, Dale asked, "And... place a new one with a fresh battery, sir?"

Powers's brows drew together in anger. Between gritted teeth, he said, "Not with the civilians listening to you say so..."

Soos was still standing in the doorway, and Dipper and Mabel were peering around him from the staircase. Melody had peeked in nervously from the gift shop. At the callout, the kids and Melody had the grace to withdraw again. But Powers wasn't looking at them. He was glancing sideways toward Bill, standing right by his side—and Bill's wide-eyed gaze never wavered from Powers's face.

This wasn't good—they did not need the agents trying to figure out why they might have left a bug in the shack. Damage control time. "Hey," Bill said. "if you forgot about it completely, must not have picked up anything interesting, right? Otherwise you'da remembered it!"

All three agents' faces immediately darkened and they exchanged meaningful looks. Bill didn't like it when people exchanged meaningful looks he didn't know the meaning of. "Apparently so," Powers muttered.

"I'll just... take this to the car," Trigger said.

Soos backed out of the way to give him room to leave, then trailed after him: "So, are there any other bugs in here we should probably know about...?"

Bill waited until Trigger was already out of the house before he said to Dale, "Hey, does he have the car keys?"

"Oh!" Dale patted his pockets, then hurried out. "Trigger, wait!"

Once his agents were gone, Powers grumbled to himself, "'Place a new one.' What happened to professionalism." He rubbed his forehead. "Find one bug that you mysteriously don't know about, and everyone forgets how to act like government agents..."

He trailed off, giving Bill an uneasy sideways glance. Bill was still staring full force at him. He cleared his throat. "You... have an incredibly penetrating gaze, ma'am."

"Thanks! Keep talking like that and maybe it'll penetrate you," Bill really wanted to say, but didn't; "flirtatious euphemisms that could be about stabbing" and "comments that put the fear of the cruel ever-watching All-Seeing Eye of God in you" were both on Bill's list of banned topics. Instead, he tried, "Thanks! You're incredibly easy to look at!"

"O-oh." Powers adjusted his tie self-consciously. Getting a little hot under the collar, huh. "Am I?"

"You bet! In fact, I was just thinking you really look like dad material."

"That's... kind of you to say," Powers said. "However, I've never liked children."

"Oh." Bill shut his eyes until the urge to turn somebody's bones into thumbtacks subsided. "Sure, that's fine. I can take 'em or leave 'em."

"Sir?" Trigger called from the doorway. "What's our next move?"

"Excuse me." Powers left Bill, heading out to join his agents on the porch.

Bill drifted out to the entryway. Mabel and Dipper were huddled on the stairs. Bill shot Mabel a pained look and hissed, "How could you have steered me so wrong?"

"Sorryyy," she whispered back. "I thought the dad one was a winner!"

"I trusted you, star girl." He slid outside behind Powers just before the door swung shut.

And just before Soos came back in, looking stricken. Dipper asked, "What happened?"

"The agent with the movie star face asked what days the museum's closed," Soos said. "I think they're thinking about searching it more? And, he told me not to leave town? I can't take this, dude." A wild look had entered his eyes. "I'm not cut out for prison. I'm too gentle-hearted!"

"Shhh." Melody took his arm and gently led him away from the door, rubbing his back. "It's gonna be all right, Soos. It sounds like the agents are distracted. Why don't we close the museum early for lunch and try looking for Gompers again, okay? Maybe he's ready to come home. And we can get some fresh air, yeah?"

"Yeah." Soos took a deep breath. "Okay. You're right." He turned toward Dipper and Mabel. "Can you dudes handle the gift shop while we're out?"

"Sure thing, Soos, no problem," Dipper said. "You go ahead."

The twins waited until they heard the sound of the gift shop exit door closing, then Dipper said, "Not it."

"Me neither," Mabel said.

"The gift shop customers can take care of themselves for a few minutes." Dipper opened the back door a crack, and they both crowded against it. Bill—leaning on the wall next to the door with his arms crossed—glanced at the kids through the crack, raised a couple fingers in acknowledgement, and then all three listened to the agents on the porch:

"Well, obviously the flash drive signal wasn't a fluke. They must have hidden it since yesterday."

"We can't leave until we find it and figure out what's happening here." (Bill made a mental note to lord that over Melody later.) "What are our next steps?"

"Should we request more sensitive equipment to scan for electronics? There might be other transmitters in the building with completely dead batteries we're not picking up." (That seemed like a fast way to discover the door hidden behind the vending machine.)

"Maybe we ought to run some more background checks on the rest of the people here. How many of them have we checked out?"

A jolt of fear shot up Bill's spine. And that seemed like a fast way to discover that "Goldie Locke" didn't legally exist. "All right," he muttered through the crack. "I tried this the human way. Now I'm doing it my way."

"Wait," Dipper hissed, "Bill, no! What are you planning?!"

Bill ignored him as he sidled up to Powers. "Not heading out already, are you?"

Powers said, "As soon as Trigger finishes updating HQ." Trigger had walked off the porch and was now making a phone call. Dale surreptitiously scooted to the other end of the porch to give Powers and Bill room to talk.

"Aww, too bad. I was enjoying watching a real investigation at work!"

"Hm. I'm afraid you didn't see us at our most competent," Powers muttered.

"Hey, everyone has an off day or two." Bill leaned closer, just near enough for his bare arm to brush Powers's suit sleeve, and murmured, "And, anyway—not to bad-mouth these rookies, but even on a bad day it's already pretty clear you're the smartest guy in the room. I can only imagine how fascinating it'd be to watch you at work when you're bringing your A game."

Powers cleared his throat, obviously trying not to look flustered. "Well. Yes. We'll no doubt be around a few more days. Perhaps we'll... cross paths again...?"

Not good. Too passive. By now, this sucker was supposed to be falling all over himself to ask out the mysterious blonde. Bill could probably ask him out and it'd go fine—but he wasn't sure how attached this guy was to traditional gender roles, there was a chance it could turn him off.

(That was the excuse he told himself. In truth, part of him was getting mad. He wanted to be the one who was asked out. He should be asked out. He was more than good enough to be asked out, and this over-evolved eukaryote had no right to deny him that.)

He pressed, "Still, I hate to see you go. Three times I've run into you, and I hardly know any more about you than I did on the beach! I get that being mysterious comes with the whole secret agent territory—but I've been going crazy, wondering all night about this handsome stranger in town." He put just the slightest emphasis on all night—and threw in a wink for good measure.

"H... have you?" Powers turned to face Bill fully. "Well... some of my personal information is classified, given the nature of my work, but—what do you want to know?"

"For starters, I think I'm overdue to ask you whether you're single!"

"I—Yes, I am."

"Whaddaya know—something we have in common!" Bill pretended he had to think a moment before saying, "Hmm... Hey, here's another fun little get-to-know-you question: what conspiracy would you most hate to be true?"

(Through the ajar crack in the door, he could hear Mabel loudly whisper, "Bill nooo...")

"That's a fascinating question. I've often wondered it myself." Powers stared off into the distance, stroking his chin thoughtfully. "I suppose... I think I'd most hate to find out the government has tried to brainwash its own citizens. Not just propaganda, mind—that's fine—I mean actual brainwashing."

No way. Bill had to pin his lips between his teeth to keep from bursting out laughing. Somebody had forgotten to tell this guy about MKUltra. Wow. Wow. He worked for the Bureau of Covert Investigations. How did he miss MKUltra. Bill had to grope behind himself for the porch sofa and sit before he lost his balance from fighting not to laugh. When he was sure he could manage a few words without a giggle escaping, he squeaked, "Yeah, that—sounds... pretty bad."

"What about yours?" Powers turned toward Bill.

He had to quickly prop his elbow on the armrest and prop his chin in his hand to hide his mouth, pretending to think. He hoped his amusement wasn't showing elsewhere on his face—human faces had too many muscles to keep track of. "Mm! Hmm." While he was trying to get his laughter under control, Bill tried to pick out one of the countless conspiracies in his repertoire that was obscure enough to be impressive but not obscure enough to be suspicious. (Or "obscure" enough Powers didn't know about it—hello, MKUltra.) "Wow, there's—there's a lot that'd be terrible. But hey, as long as we're talking politics—" (Mabel hissed "Bill NO!") "—I've heard a rumor in the area that there's a secret crazy president that was kicked out and covered up in the history books, ever heard about that one?" That oughta grab his attention.

But to Bill's surprise, Powers frowned thoughtfully and slowly shook his head. "No, it's unfamiliar. It must be a local theory," he said. "If the government were to cover up an entire presidency, I'm sure they would have a pressing reason for it—but I do see how the concept would be alarming."

Bill stared at him. Did this guy not know anything the government was up to?! He should have been going out of his mind trying to figure out how Bill knew about Trembley. Powers wasn't the kind of agent who could tell decent lies. If he did know something, he wouldn't play dumb like that; he'd just tell Bill it was "classified." Did he really not know? But the eagles' search for Trembley's remains should have nothing to do with the memories Ford wiped from the agents' minds.

The Bureau of Covert Investigations was so covert, agents usually weren't even told about other bureau investigations they weren't personally part of. So...

Was the bureau running two investigations in Gravity Falls?

Had Powers not been looped into the Trembley case?

"Uh..." Bill scrambled to think of another conspiracy that might catch Powers's interest. (He and Trigger had mentioned Hangar 618; no wonder they had time to work on cases across the country if they were only handling half the active investigations in Gravity Falls—no, focus, focus.) "How about Big Fashion, have you heard of that one? The theory that the fashion industry's teaming up to take down ways for people to get clothes other than buying new. Thrift shops, fabric stores, sewing pattern companies..."

Powers nodded. "I'm familiar with the theory." (Oh good—Bill would've been embarrassed for him if he hadn't known that one.) "I'm afraid I haven't paid close attention to the evidence for it. I already buy all my clothes new—I don't like the thought of another man's skin cells lingering on the inside of my shirts, it feels unsanitary."

It was no wonder this guy had been assigned to Gravity Falls. Bill doubted he was weird enough to really fit in here—but he was just odd enough to feel the town's pull. "For starters, there's the assassination of the president of Valhalla Sewing Machines a few years ago. Sewing machines are one of Big Fashion's top targets."

"Something definitely happened there," Powers agreed, "but all evidence points to the hit being ordered by Crooner Company over their rival line of sewing machines. They did acquire Valhalla just a few months later."

"And Crooner's been battling the bad PR ever since," Bill said dismissively. "Neither company came out of that mess looking good. It was an obvious false flag operation!"

Powers frowned, and for a moment Bill worried that he'd said too much—that Powers either thought Bill sounded like a crackpot, or thought Bill knew too much for some small town civilian... but he said, approvingly, "You know your stuff."

Jackpot. Time to go in for the kill. "I try to! I'm interested in how the gears of the universe turn. Reality, society, politics, business—what greases those wheels? Who winds the clock? There's a lot going on underneath the surface. And I like to keep my eye on all of it." He lowered his voice. "Actually, I'm glad to see you in town. I've also felt like something's going on under the surface of this town, but..." He left the sentence dangling.

Slowly, Power said, "Something... paranormal, perhaps?"

"Ha! Between the Mystery Shack here and that 'child psychic' in town, that's the reputation Gravity Falls has now," Bill said. "I'm not the kind of gullible dope to get spooked by ghost stories without proof. But—whatever's going on here... it does feel spooky."

Powers nodded slowly. "Whenever I'm in this town, I have the exact same thoughts."

Bill fought to keep the triumph off his face.

####

Dipper whispered, "I can't believe this is working."

He and Mabel were crammed against the door, one on top of each other, listening to Bill say, "This has been a fascinating conversation. I'd love to hear more about your work... wink."

Dipper said, "I can't believe this is working even though he says 'wink' out loud."

Mabels shushed him. "Bill's doing great!"

Powers said, "Unfortunately, I do have to go submit my own report to headquarters. But, I'm free this evening. If you'd like to see a movie, or...?"

Mabel gasped. "Idea!" She tapped on the door's window to catch Bill's attention, and, when he glanced her way, she pointed out toward the clearing beyond the porch.

Bill looked at the clearing and twitched in surprise. Through the crack in the door, Dipper tried to see what Bill was looking at. He couldn't see anything in the clearing.

Bill turned to Powers. "Howsabout dinner? There's a diner in town called Greasy's. I've heard good things about it! For starters, that the food is better than the name."

Dipper hissed between his teeth. "Wait, hold on—he's not allowed to go out, is he?" But Mabel didn't answer; she was sprinting full speed up the stairs.

From the far end of the porch, Dale said, "Oh, Greasy's is terrific, I went there yesterday for lunch. Makes a damn fine cup of coffee. And try the cherry pie."

"Very well," Power said. "When should I...?"

"I'll meet you at the diner. Let's say seven."

When the agents had left, Dipper yanked open the door. "What was that?! Nobody said you could actually leave to go on a date!"

Bill shrugged. "It wasn't my idea, it was your sister's."

"What?" Dipper frowned. "When did she say that?"

"She didn't. She's going to."

Mabel pounded down the stairs, counting the steps under her breath—"twenty-six, twenty-seven, twenty eight"—carrying a neon yellow posterboard folded loosely in half. She ran out the door to the clearing behind the shack, held up the posterboard—she'd written "♡ INVITE HIM TO GREASY'S ♡" in thick black marker—and announced, "Ta-da!"

"You're too late," Dipper said. "Bill already asked Powers and he already left."

Bill said, "I asked him because I saw her telling me to."

Dipper looked between Bill and the poster. "Ohhh. Hang on. This is a future sight thing?"

"Bingo."

"How long should I hold it up?" Mabel called.

"Just give it another ten seconds," Bill said. "That thing's fluorescent, I could probably see it from an hour away."

She bounced on the balls of her feet for a few more seconds, then said, "Okay!" and jogged back to the porch, beaming from ear to ear. "That was so cool."

"Hey, smart girl!" Bill caught Mabel's sleeve before she could run past him. "You know, I've been talking to humans for thousands of years, and you're the first who's ever sent a message backwards in time to me?"

"Really?" Her face lit up. "Shut up! There's no way I'm the first-first!"

"Hand on heart, Shooting Star, no other human's ever tried it," Bill said. "You can't even see the fourth dimension, but you still understand it well enough to send messages through it. I'm genuinely impressed!"

Mabel's delight reached a boiling over point. She cackled in glee, gave Bill a quick hug, and bounded into the living room, crowing, "I'M THE GREATEST!"

Bill watched Mabel zoom into the gift shop, grinning proudly; and then his eyes slid sideways to meet Dipper's. "What's that look for."

Dipper was leveling his best suspicious glare at Bill. "Oh, nothing," he said. "Just thinking about how, the last time I heard you say you were impressed, you were just manipulating me into letting you puppet my body."

"Hmm! Yeah! I did do that!" Bill said. "Did I say I was genuinely impressed?"

Dipper's scowl deepened.

Bill's smirk widened. "C'mon, kid, don't be jealous just because you're not the alpha twin. It'd make your sister feel terrible."

####

"You actually got a date?" Ford asked.

"Sure! As if it's hard!"

Stan smugly held out a hand, palm up. Ford shot him an exasperated look, but sighed, fished around in his pocket, pulled out five large one-dollar coins, and dropped them in Stan's hand.

Bill stared at Ford, brows raised. "I don't know what's more insulting: that you bet against me, or that you've stopped using paper currency." Ford didn't deign to respond.

When they had been absolutely sure the agents were gone—for now—Soos had gone downstairs to let the Stans know the coast was clear; and now the adults were gathered in the living room again to discuss their next moves. Or, rather, Bill's.

Stan said, "So there's still been no sign of Gompers?"

"Nope," Soos said. "He's really run off. Plus, me and Melo—" (at Ford's look, he corrected himself) "—Melody and I drove around earlier looking for him? You know, in case he came out of the woods somewhere? But one of the government guys started following me in a black car? Sooo we had to stop looking, and I guess we're still being watched."

"Which'll make it harder to sneak me out for my date without them noticing I live here," Bill said. Maybe they could sneak him out with the crystal flashlight trick he and Mabel had pulled before, but he'd rather not tell the other Pines how they'd pulled that off in case they ever had to do it again. "We might be able to split 'em up while we outnumber them, but if this goes on for long, they'll bring in reinforcements."

"Ford and I can't help distract them," Stan pointed out. "We've gotta stay inside. And Soos is the only one that can drive Bill to this date. With the kids' help, we've only just got enough people to split the agents up."

Ford muttered, "Meaning there's no one to keep a watch over Bill." He crossed his arms. "Letting Bill flirt with a government agent under our roof is one thing—but I don't like a plan that involves letting Bill out in public and trusting him not to throw us under the bus." (Bill had considered it, but decided it would just cause the government to seize his portal and Mabel to never speak to him again.)

"He wouldn't do that," Soos said hotly—to Bill's surprise. "He already had a chance to run away and he didn't! And if he wanted us to get in trouble, he could have just not helped at all!"

"I..." Ford looked for a moment like he wanted to protest—Bill expected him to protest—but then he grimaced, shut his mouth, and said nothing. There was an even bigger surprise. Bill wasn't actually making progress with Ford, was he? Bill stared at the side of his face, willing him to explain himself; but Ford avoided his gaze.

Stan said, "Listen, I don't like letting him out either, but I don't think we have a choice."

"All right, all right," Ford sighed. "Fine. I don't like it—but unless Gompers shows up in the next few hours, you're still our best hope of getting out of this mess." (Bill decided to pretend that was praise and spent a second basking in it.) "Which means you have to find out everything the agents currently know and suspect, keep them away from anything that could restore their memories, convince them to turn their attention away from our household without the flash drive, andmake sure no one gets arrested. And you've got one date to do it all in."

It was a tall order—but the way Ford said it like a challenge, like he thought maybe Bill couldn't do it, made Bill's blood boil. "Piece of cake! Don't forget it's taken me less time than that to convince you to do a lllot more than that." At Ford's scowl, Bill grinned viciously. "One date's all I need. By the end of the night, I'll have this whole thing figured out." If he said it like he believed it, it was basically true.

####

(The only bits of this that were changed in the wake of TBOB were adding in the discussion about the Seduction Hat; and adding a short section establishing that Powers's team is not involved with the Trembley investigation and briefly mentioning Hangar 618. In the original draft of this chapter, I'd said that a different government department was handling the Trembley case, until TBOB established otherwise. Establishing that Powers's team wasn't on the Trembley case is something that'll be important in future chapters.

From here on out the plot arc speeds up and turns increasingly into some kinda fusion between a spy drama and a reverse heist movie. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts so far and your thoughts on where it's gonna go!)

[suzukiblu]

Day one of February’s third weekly WIP behind the cut; “interdimensional kidnapping via Robin”. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“Am I like–for real yours?” he asks in a small voice, keeping his eyes down on the sidewalk. “You keep–you keep talking like you’re really gonna keep me. Like–like you’re gonna.” 

. . . fuck, he has been, hasn't he. 

Kon sniffles again; scrubs his cuffed wrist across his eyes again. Tim hates the sight of that fucking cuff, again. 

“I . . . look, I don't own you, kid, but–yes,” he says, because what the hell else is he even supposed to say? Because, well . . . Kon isn't wrong. Obviously. Even if that’s about to be a serious wrench in literally his entire life. “At least, well–I could find someone else to take care of you if you'd rather, but–” 

Kon stops walking and bursts into tears. 

Fuck, Tim thinks very calmly, and just tightens his grip on the other's hand as carefully as he can. Just–tight, but not too tight for Kon to be able to pull away from it if he wants. At least–hopefully the kid'll parse it that way, anyway. Hopefully the kid'll understand it that way. 

“Sorry,” he says, which is probably stupid and unhelpful, but it's what he says. Kon cries harder, so–definitely stupid and unhelpful, yeah. 

Dammit. 

Tim ducks down into a crouch in front of the kid; keeps holding his hand and cradles the other's shoulder with his free hand. Kon keeps crying, half-choking on hitched little sobs as tears spill down his face over and over, his face screwed up tight and all red and wet behind the half-cover of his cuffed wrist. Tim wants to cut the damn thing off him. Tim wants to burn down every reality except whichever one this kid currently wants to be in. 

He wants to make this kid feel safe. 

Burning down the multiverse would probably be easier than that, though. 

“Kid,” he says, quiet and tight. Kon cries a little harder, ducking his head and burying his face in his hand. He doesn’t let go of Tim’s, though. Tim has increasing thoughts of multidimensional arson, but at this point would settle for a correctly-sized bolt cutter. 

“S-sorry,” Kon chokes. He sounds like he thinks it’s just as stupid and unhelpful as Tim felt like saying it himself was. “Sorry. Sorry, I’m not–just I didn’t–just–sorry.” 

“You don’t have to be,” Tim tells him, giving his hand and shoulder both a very gentle squeeze. “Can you tell me what’s wrong?” 

“Dunno,” Kon sniffles, tears still spilling wet and messy past his hand. “I feel–I feel all–all I dunno.” 

“Okay,” Tim says quietly. “That’s alright. What do you need right now?” 

“Please don’t be a liar,” Kon says, and it comes out more a sob than anything else. “Don’t–don’t lie to me. Please. I’ll be really good, I promise, just–just don’t lie.” 

That is actually one of the hardest things someone could ever ask him, Tim’s pretty sure, but also the person currently asking him it is a four month-old/ten year-old version of the best friend he’s ever had in his life, who never even got to be ten, so like . . . he’ll goddamn figure it out, won’t he. 

“Alright,” he agrees. “I won’t lie to you.” 

Kon cries a lot harder.

[gatorbites-imagines]

Hello gatorbite, I really liked your imagines with Mark Grayson, could you do an imagine of Mark with a Male Reader who is a vampire?

Mark Grayson x vampire king male reader

Headcanons

Cooking my own headcanons for vampires, how else are they gonna go on cute dates on the beach as the sun goes down?? Ive been listening to abracadabra by Lady Gaga for days, its been keeping me sane.

Mark and the bad bitch he pulled by being a nerd. i had a lot of fun writing this, i would love to write more about these two, or more vampire reader,,,

You guys would first have met after he became a hero, sometime during season 2. Probably before he got Oliver but after his dad left the planet and Mark wanted to fix everything and started working with Cecil.

The GDA knew of your existence of course. You were the first ever vampire, created through horrible magic and rituals against your will. This meant you couldn’t die, even from the sun or a stake or silver.

Every other vampire someone would meet would come from you in some way. Or rather, they were bitten by someone who was bitten by someone, so on and so forth until it reached you, kinda like a disease. The further out you go, the wilder and more animalistic the vampires are.

The few vampires you have bitten and turned yourself are strong and can walk in sunlight, and have other otherworldly powers, but those they bite have weaker powers, etc etc. and all other vampires but you can die. As long as life and death exist, so will you.

How you guys meet can be a mixed bag, but the most plausible is that some rabid vampires have run wild somewhere, and Mark was sent to deal with them since his skin can’t be pierced by their fangs.

The vampires he encounters are naked, human-looking creatures with warped faces, a mouth full of sharp teeth, shark bat-like features and the like. The only thing human about them is their shape.

A nest of vampires has run wild, and as the so called “vampire king”, “vampire well” or even “first vampiric ancestor”, its your duty to take care of it when it gets out of hand.

At this point Mark isn’t at his strongest, so the nest of vampire spawn gain the upper hand. Even with super strength, its hard for Mark since he also doesn’t want to kill at this point, and these technically were humans once.

So, imagine Marks shock, as he’s being overpowered by hundreds of these creatures that are more instinct than sense, when these creatures are sliced in half and turn into dust.

As the vampire king you can teleport all over the planet, you could probably even warp other planets if you focused hard enough. You might have done that once or twice, leading to vampirism spreading to different parts of the universe… but nobody has to know that…

What you wear can be up for debate, do you wear something from the time you died? Something Victorian? Or modern? I can’t imagine you are too involved with the current fashion since time passes so fast for you, so maybe it’s a bit out of fashion. You still look great though.

Maybe it’s having been beaten so hard by the now dead spawn, or maybe it’s just your vampiric influence, but Mark finds himself blushing and breathing a little harder.

The first time you meet doesn’t lead to much other than you taking care of the spawn, apologizing to Mark for causing such a mess and telling him you will take more care of your offspring. Mark just kinda goes “yeah, okay, thanks man…” before passing out.

You end up teleporting mark back to the GDA, or wherever hes being brought, like to the new guardians or whatever. Because obviously none of their protection measures can keep you out. It’s only weaker vampires that need an invitation inside.

They are all pretty damn uncomfortable when you comment about how nice Marks blood smells, because being thousands of years old also means you don’t have any shame in stating the obvious.

You say hello to Immortal before leaving. Of course, you guys know each other, both being immortal and all that. You guys play cards at least once every ten years or so, sometimes more, sometimes less.

This is also why Immortal is the most chill about you showing up, coming and going as you please, and saying Mark smells delicious. You once said he smelled delicious too when you first met, the stronger the person the better their blood and all. Now you guys are friends though, in a way.

After that you guys meet every now and then, mainly because you take his interest and Immortals friendship as an invite to come and go as you please, like a big scary housecat dressed in black.

You also follow him around (stalk him pretty much), and maybe it’s just him secretly loving steamy vampire fanfiction, or some viltrumite instinct, but being hunted is exciting.

You guys finally starting to date would also happen at some random moment when you guys are alone. You would have known about Marks attraction from the very moment you met, but your cold unbeating heart had started warming up around him too.

All his rambling about heroes and fictional stories worked like a charm. The many many questions about vampires and pop culture was cute too. He couldn’t believe that the whole weak to garlic thing started as an inside joke amongst vampires and spread out, when it wasn’t even true.

Mark was positively shocked when the whole pop culture idea that being bitten felt good turned out to be true. Later you would explain it was all about intent and reception. If you wanted it to hurt and he feared you, then it would have hurt. But because he was a little freak who was really into it, then it brought pleasure.

Mark also never thought you would be able to bite through his skin, but you could. Only because of your whole, king of the vampires, first original vampire, deal. Any other vampire wouldn’t be able to bite through vultrumite skin.

Being able to rip through vultrumites will be useful later, and not needing to breathe and being able to fly as well. But that’s for later space adventures.

When the whole thing with Oliver happens, you are of course there to support Mark, but also his family. Cecil also knows not to fuck with you, because its all thanks to you that the dead don’t rise and come for him every single day.

This may mean it doesn’t end as badly as in season 3, or, Mark just has some more support, very powerful support that the GDA knows to fear. Because how is Cecil gonna manipulate the original manipulator? The one strong enough to bewitch the entire planet if he wanted to?

You also have a better time explaining morals and powers to Oliver, since you are still stronger than him at this point, so you can put him in his place when he needs it. Being nonhuman also helps a lot, since Oliver feels his power disconnects him from humanity.

This gives Mark some more room to find himself and settle, and yeah, I feel like him and his family end up moving into wherever you stay. Be it some massive gothic castle in Romania, or a Victorian mansion at the edge of a massive cliff in England, who knows.

Both because its safer, more comfortable, and they get to feel like they don’t always have to look over their shoulder.

You don’t survive the coffin allegations though, since you sleep in a grand one, and have at least 100 different coffins you switch between. Most were gifts from your spawn, or one or two from immortal as “congrats on living another hundred” gift. You gifted him weapons or houses in return.

Mark can’t sleep in the coffins with you, since he hates how claustrophobic it makes him. But he will sleep beside the coffin. You guys keep the lid pushed to the side enough for you to stick a hand out, so you guys can hold hands.

I feel like Oliver would thrive a lot under you and your spawns, since you keep your “children” in line. Being direct descendants of you means they are powerful enough to play and roughhouse with, but also help him train.

Mark trains with you instead, and it regularly ends up with him almost giggling and kicking his feet as you pin him down, barring his neck all “oh please, vampire king, please don’t bite me”.

It takes Debbie a while to settle in, but maybe she meets one of your spawn to gets on with well, or she doesn’t at all. Maybe she just takes the time to heal and find herself when she sees her sons are happy.

You end up getting the shovel talk from her though, which all your direct descendants peek around the corner of the doorway to watch. Somehow you look meek as she points a finger at you and tell you to treat her son right and with respect.

I haven’t read very far in the comics so I cant tell you what happens after this, but Mark will have you by his side when everything goes down, and that might help change it to a more positive outcome.

It might help to have a lover who isn’t held back by his humanity and morals. You are more than willing to turn entire planets into your mindless spawn if it means keeping your dear ones safe. It does lead to a horrible argument and Mark not talking to you for a while, but he forgives you at some point.

Reading his secret fanfic does help with that, even if it means you have to dress like a man from the current era, style your hair and stalk him when he sleeps (as if you don’t already do that).

Being a super ancient and rich vampire also means you can pile gifts on Mark, Oliver and Debbie. Mostly Mark, but you don’t want his kin to be left out. So, Mark gets to live out his nerdy dreams to the extreme.

You’ll remodel a whole part of your house for him if it comes down to it. Your direct spawn will coo at you becoming soft. You let them, for now, but you’ll get your revenge, especially seeing them all tied around the Grayson’s fingers too.

You are so used to dealing with the GDA that it also isn’t hard to keep them at bay, how are they gonna invade a place that’s existed longer than democracy? You will burn the whole place down if you have too. Anything for your nerdy little hero.

[katyaromanoffpetrova]

A deceitful Valentine's

It's Valentine's Day and Natasha is on a mission. Katya won't let the day pass by without seeing her.

• Natasha Romanoff x Fem!OC (Katya Petrova) • Wordcount: 1.9k • Warnings: sexual talk (they're horny lesbians) •A/N: not proofread because it's 1AM and i'm tired :) Masterlist

Do not repost my work as your own or translate my work!!

''No, I'm not helping you so you can fuck each other's brains out in a hotel room. Or whatever it is that you lesbians do.''

''Wow,'' Katya breathed, an amused smile lingering on her lips as she watched her appalled friend shake his head. ''I thought you were a romantic.''

''Me?'' Clint scoffed, shuffling through the papers on his messy desk. He hadn't been able to look at her since she asked her question, a red tint on his cheeks. Obviously, it made him uncomfortable. Katya loved making men uncomfortable. ''Valentine's Day is a ridiculous product of capitalism, created to make us spend more money on things we don't need.''

Katya hummed knowingly, placing her hands on his desk. ''Is that why you bought Laura that perfume she's been obsessed with for months? And, oh, what is this?'' With a smirk, she plucked a Valentine's card from underneath a stack of papers on his desk. 

Swift like a cobra, Clint snatched it from her hand before she could open it. His cheeks burned as he stashed the red and pink paper deep in a desk drawer, slamming it shut loudly. ''You Russian dickheads need to stay out of my business,'' he grumbled. Natasha had been sitting next to him when he ordered that perfume, and while he thought he'd been sneaky, obviously she saw. And then told Katya.

The brunette had to fight off a malicious laugh, in the depths of her element. ''Hm… Natalia will be thrilled to hear about that card.'' She tilted her head, pursing her lips as she pretended to think hard. ''What did it read on the front, again? 'A man like me has a lot to be thankful for'?'' 

''Okay, okay!'' Clint looked like he was about to scream in frustration, slamming the papers in his hands down. He knew she was completely serious in her threats—she would tell Natasha. But Katya could keep a secret if he helped her out. ''Fine, I'll help with your plan.'' He pointed a warning finger at her. ''But if I face serious consequences because I tempered with an agent's mission, it's your responsibility.''

''Absolutely.'' Katya nodded sternly, her eyebrows knitted together. ''I'll tell them I blackmailed you with a Valentine's Day card.''

Spotting the amused glint in her eyes, Clint shook his head with exasperation. One of these days, either Katya or Natasha was going to cause him a mental breakdown because they were just so good at emotional manipulation. ''You need serious help,'' he muttered, grabbing his laptop.

~~~~

The hotel bar wasn't too busy. Most people were still enjoying their late dinner or were spending the evening with their lover, holed up in a bedroom. Natasha had seen enough of them today; couples. It's the one day of the year where people suddenly seem to remember to show affection to their partners. Dinners, movies, gifts—they were all talking about the same things, all day.

She didn't really care about Valentine's Day as a holiday. Sure, she and Katya bought a little something for each other, and tried to do something together if they got the chance to—not including the evening sex, of course—but she did it because it made Katya happy. Natasha was a moreso a believer of showing her appreciation all year 'round. Leaving a sweet note, taking her out for dinner, planning a movie night with snacks, running Katya a bath, giving her a massage. 

But Natasha would be lying if she said that she didn't miss her a little more today. This mission had been dragging on for three weeks. And while she had hoped to be home tonight, she was sitting in a five star hotel's fancy bar, all dressed up, sipping on her Dirty Martini, because Clint had given her new intel. Seducing a man, of all things, when she had a sexy, attractive woman waiting for her at home, must be the universe's type of karma. 

Lazily, she stirred her drink, seeing the bartender move around in her peripheral vision. The stools beside her were empty, the atmosphere calm; soft, classical music playing in the background. It was boring. Clint didn't say what time her target's ''business associate'' would arrive. She could be sitting there for hours. Her mind wasn't as focused as it should be, her thoughts drifting away from her.

It took her a moment too long to realize that somebody was sitting down on her left, gracefully settling down on the high stool with a quiet rustle. There was a flash of red silk, and then a whiff of a deep, sensual perfume. 

Natasha stiffened, her body already knowing what her mind didn't want to believe yet. Slowly, from the corner of her eye, she looked her neighbor up and down, her gaze lingering on their chest and exposed neck. It was the most elegant, exquisite picture she'd ever seen, the red silk dress draping around her figure like liquid. Most of her back was exposed, a decent amount of cleavage showing while the fabric ran all the way to her ankles in loose waves, accentuating the curves Natasha could draw with her eyes closed. 

This was the type of woman men used to go to war for.

Natasha's heart started to race in her chest. "Fuck," she muttered under her breath as she averted her eyes forward again, fighting to keep her cool. Preferably, she'd rip that dress off her body right here, right now, but she had a mission to run. Although she was starting to get an inkling that she might have been misled. "You're not supposed to be here."

"Would you like something to drink, ma'am?" The bartender had materialized in front of them.

Katya smiled charmingly and placed her clutch on the bar. "A Vodka-Martini, please."

''Coming right up.''

Natasha followed the man with her eyes as he walked off to make her order. Next to her, Katya casually touched up her lipstick. Fuck, it was her favorite. "I'm assuming there's no "business associate" I'm meeting tonight?"

"I thought you'd rather have me instead,'' Katya said, tapping at her lip with her ring finger. Her complete lack of fucks given about interrupting her mission and using Clint to lure her here with a lie was both annoying and amusing. Natasha wanted to be more pissed, but in reality, she was really happy to see her.

"You're not wrong, but I am supposed to be on duty around the clock."

"Screw the mission,'' Katya declared, tossing her lipstick and mirror back in her clutch before turning to face her girlfriend. She tilted her head, a smile on her perfectly kissable lips. ''It's Valentine's Day. We're not supposed to be apart."

Part of Natasha's brain wasn't working correctly. Katya's alluring appearance had hypnotized her. She wasn't sure if she wanted to sculpt her beauty into marble for all eternity to see, or worship her body all night until it was covered in drops of sweat. "So you sabotaged my mission because you missed me too much?" She smirked, finally giving in and turning her body in Katya's direction.

The brunette shrugged, something mischievous flashing across her face. "Maybe I'm just incredibly horny."

Caught off guard by her bold statement, Natasha nearly lost her composure. "Are you?" She mused, ignoring the twitch low in her stomach.

Instead of answering, Katya smirked confidently. "Are you?"

"Definitely." She couldn't lie—or joke—about the impact Katya had on her, her teasing demeanor fading into an intense, lustful one as she took the time to take in Katya's appearance once more. "You look fucking incredible," she muttered, noting how Katya shifted on her stool at the desire in her voice.

In that dress, she was an expensive, rich wine from France and Natasha was the alcoholic who hadn't had a drop in three weeks. It took every ounce of self-control to stay seated. Her throat was dry, her hands were itching. 

Reluctantly tearing her gaze away, Natasha reached for her drink and took a big sip. It didn't fix her burning throat, but the sensation brought her back to Earth. "Maybe I should leave more often so you can interrupt my missions looking like this," she joked.

Katya chuckled, slowly circling the rim of her Martini glass with her finger. "Or, you can take me out to dinner sometime, give me a reason to dress up." Her gaze met Natasha's. "Maybe to one of those posh restaurants where I would actually have to wear underwear to."

Natasha's fingers tightened around her glass, her wide eyes flickering to Katya's hips. "Baby…" Katya had prepared for this night to end one way, and with how she was working her up, Natasha knew it was going to be good. She smiled to herself, excitement flooding her veins. "I'm gonna buy Clint such a big bottle of Vodka when I get back."

"I don't think he's gonna be able to look at us for a while. It's pretty obvious what I was planning when I asked him to help us meet up. At night. In a hotel."

"Oh, yeah?" Natasha smirked.

Katya raised an eyebrow. "If I'm still able to walk out of here by myself tomorrow, I'm gonna make you pay for this dress."

Natasha chuckled, reaching out and slowly trailing her fingertips up Katya's arm. They left a trail of goosebumps in their wake. "How about this: I ruin your pretty makeup, your ability to walk, and I pay for the dress?"

"That better be a promise." Katya's lips held a daring smirk, her body still as Natasha's fingers had reached her collarbone. "My mascara is waterproof."

"Do you doubt me?" Natasha asked, her hand ghosting over Katya's throat. A shiver ran through the brunette's body as her pupils dilated. 

"I know you like to talk big."

Natasha pulled her hand away to place it over her heart. "Katariina, you're breaking my heart."

"I didn't know you had one to break," Katya mused.

"It's a little messed up, but it's yours."

Between all the flirting and sexual tension, this half-hearted, soft joke came out of nowhere. Katya had to take a second to switch around. "Where did you learn to sweet-talk like that?''

Natasha shrugged, turning away to take another sip of her drink. ''A place where I met this girl.''

Katya's smile turned knowingly, warmth swirling in her chest. She loved it whenever Natasha spoke about falling in love with her. ''There's always a girl."

''This one was special. She cared. And nobody had ever cared about me." Their eyes met. Natasha's started to sparkle with a amusement. "Oh, and she had the most beautiful blue eyes.''

Katya fought the urge to roll them. ''She sounds nice.''

''She's more than just nice." Placing a hand on her thigh, Natasha leaned in more with every word, until their faces were only inches apart. Her breath fanned over Katya's chin. "She's brave, and kind, and stunning, and so incredibly smart…''

A low hum fell from Katya's lips, her gaze flickering from the redhead's mouth to her eyes. Her heart raced in her chest. ''You're trying to get in my pants.''

''I thought you weren't wearing any.''

Katya smiled amusedly, her thigh tensing up when Natasha's hand started to creep higher. This was exactly how she hoped this night would go. ''So, how did things end with that girl?''

Her breath hitched when she caught the look on Natasha's face. So lustful. If all of that was going to be released tonight, then her girlfriend would for sure make good on her promise. 

Katya's stomach swirled heavy with anticipation as Natasha brought her mouth to her ear. ''With her underneath me, naked, in a hotel room, her pretty dress on the floor, screaming my name as I make her cum for the sixth time in one night.''

And then they have bed-breaking, wall-shaking, earth-shattering sex

A/N: Please consider reblogging if you liked this fic. It really helps me :)

[scary-grace]

pretty please will you write [bouquet] but reader gives flowers to tomura <33333

Thank you for the prompt! This got angsty and I apologize. Hopefully I can redeem myself with the third prompt! Post-canon, 2.1k, angst.

memory garden

The bouquet you buy gets bigger every year.

You’re in the interminable line at the florist’s, you and a bunch of guys in business suits and wedding rings, identical guilty looks on their faces, and somehow your bouquet is the biggest one. Not for the first time since you picked it up, you wonder if you’ve overdone it. White roses. Red roses – deep red, not bright red. Periwinkle-blue buddleia, ferns, baby’s breath, and ivy. It’s a lot of flowers. A lot of money. And it’s not like the person they’re for is going to appreciate them.

But it’s one day a year. One bouquet, and it’s the only bouquet he’s going to get. You kiss your pastry budget goodbye for the next week and wait for your turn at the checkout counter, feeling like shit for even thinking of buying something smaller. So what if you’ve got the biggest bouquet in line? It’s worth it. You don’t need anybody else to understand, which is a good thing. You barely understand the impulse yourself.

The last few Valentine’s Days, it’s been bright and cold and sunny, a picturesque winter day. Today it’s raining, and you check the forecast on the train with increasing dismay. It’s going to be a swamp by the time you get there, and you’ll be going home cold and wet and muddy. You’re already tired. It was an awful week at work, but when isn’t it, really? You work in Homicide, and in spite of society’s supposed great leaps forward since the war ended, people are still in the business of killing each other. If you didn’t have your quirk, you’d work anywhere else.

But you do have your quirk – Red Cap, which gives you a heads-up and flashback every time you walk over a spot where someone died a violent death. Working Homicide really is the only job you’re good for, although in the aftermath of the war, you were embedded with the national coroner’s office, walking the battlefields to identify victims, perpetrators, and causes of death. It’s not what you want to do with your life, but it pays. Enough that you could probably stand to get more than one bouquet, one day a year. But there’s only one day of the year where you can buy a bunch of flowers without anybody asking why.

As you’re putting your phone away, one of your friends texts you about a last-minute blind date – some friend of her boyfriend’s whose date fell through, who’s going to be a total wet blanket and ruin their night if nobody distracts him. Will you go on a pity date with him? You’re not his type and he’s not yours, but all you have to do is keep him busy for a little while. With an offer like that, how can you refuse? You text back one-handed. Sorry. I have plans.

doing what?? I know you’re single

I have plans, you type again. Even if your plan was to get plastered and forget about tomorrow, you’re not going to go on a date where you’re so obviously the consolation prize. And you wouldn’t be that much of a prize, either – once people hear about your job, and your quirk, they’re usually not interested. Sorry. I hope you can work something out!

The exclamation point feels forced. You tuck your phone away and stare out the window at the rain, the bunch of flowers rustling in your shaky hands.

The view out the window reminds you just how much Japan has changed. It’s been almost eight years since the war, and everywhere that matters to anybody has been rebuilt, bigger and better than before. Every city’s skyline bristles with skyscrapers, every highway has wider lanes – and in between are places that aren’t important enough to merit a rebuild, places that have been patched back together haphazardly or been allowed to fall into disrepair. Bigger cities, empty villages. More pretty city parks, fewer nature reserves. And every so often you’ll look out the window and see a dark shadow across the landscape, a scar that will never heal. Or so they say. People say time heals everything, and sometimes, you almost believe them.

Once you reach your destination, you’ve still got a ways to go. This part is uncomfortable. It always is, not because the terrain once you’re off the main road is rough, but because everywhere you step is a place someone breathed their last. This is the final battlefield from the Villain War. You’d say the number of deaths that occurred here is countless, except you have counted. That’s how you know where to go.

The rain soaks through your clothes as you pick your way across the barren, muddy field. At one edge of it there’s a shrine to all the heroes who fell, not just here but in the entire war, and on important days, there are people queuing up to leave offerings and pay their respects. You keep walking, hating the way your feet squelch in the mud. The longer you stay in touch with a particular piece of earth, the more information you pick up about the death that occurred there, and you saw enough the first time.

The death site you’re looking for is at the far edge of the field, pushed up into the shadow of the mountain that rears up nearby. It’s unmarked, of course. It would be unattended even if it wasn’t. No one mourns the wicked, after all, and Shigaraki Tomura, the Symbol of Fear, was as wicked as they come. Or so they say.

When you found his death site, what you witnessed through your quirk brought you to your knees. That’s not how it usually goes for you, how it usually went by that point. Almost every person who dies is scared while it happens. A lot of them are confused. A lot of them are angry or hurt or betrayed. But none of them are all of those things at once, and empty and lost and hollow at the same time, and while you’ve walked over many death sites, Shigaraki’s is the only one that’s ever taken you down. And when you got back up, you couldn’t see him as the monster he was any longer.

You thought reading the book the surviving members of the League of Villains wrote would help clear your head, or at least remind you who you were really losing sleep over. When that didn’t work, you went to visit the book’s author in prison. Spinner wanted to talk about Shigaraki, his best friend and his only friend, but nothing he said matched what you saw. Deku, who killed Shigaraki, never talks about him at all, and you can’t explain to anyone that you’re haunted by the last moments of a villain who was horrifying and tragic in almost equal measures. So you had to find something else to do.

You reach the far side of the field and come to a stop. You moved a rock a few years ago to mark the death site, so you wouldn’t have to step on it and retraumatize yourself every year, and you stop a meter or so back from where you know the edge lies. And then, like always, you hit a wall. You could keep doing this for the rest of your life, and you’ll still never know the right thing to say as you set down the bouquet. The last few years, you’ve just set it down and left.

But that thought’s in your head again – one bouquet, one day of the year. He doesn’t have a shrine or a grave marker, and you’re the only one who knows exactly where he died. If you only got one visitor every year, you’d want them to say something. Anything.

Anything, from you, is usually a bad idea. “I’m still working at Homicide. The murder rate hasn’t dropped back to pre-war levels yet. I go walking over two or three crime scenes a week, and none of them have ever been as awful as what I felt when I walked over yours.”

So what, you can imagine him saying. You get to walk away. This was my whole life, and I died as I lived. Do you expect me to feel sorry for you or something? “I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. That’s not why I’m saying that. I just – I wanted you to know that it really was that bad. All the pain you felt, all that anger – it’s unbearable. I can see why you’d do anything to get away.”

You wouldn’t do what Shigaraki did, you don’t think. Then again, you don’t have that kind of power. The only person you can torment with your quirk is yourself. “I don’t know why I come out here. Or why I bring flowers. You probably hated flowers,” you say. You can imagine his response to that, too: Yeah, no shit. “I never met you, but I can’t unsee what I saw. I wish I’d never seen it.”

You feel that way about everything you’ve seen and felt through your quirk, but this especially. “I wish I’d never seen it, but I did see it. And it would be wrong to look away.”

That was something you remember from that first flashback, the one that laid you out in the filth on the battlefield. The way the emptiness inside him yawned wide, a gaping void no amount of rage and destruction could fill, a desperate howl that still echoes through your mind –  look at me, notice me, save me – a cry for help that went forever unanswered. It’s too late for Shigaraki Tomura. Whatever you could possibly do rings hollow, and he’ll never see it, anyway. The longer you think about it, the more miserable you get. You need to go, before you spend another Valentine’s Day crying on the train home.

But to leave the bouquet by your makeshift marker, you have to cross the death site. As you hesitate, you hear that voice in your head, cobbled together from every newscast of the destruction of Jaku City or the final battle that took place here: This was my whole life. You get to walk away. You steep yourself and cross onto the death site, and like always, it hits you like a knockout punch. All you can do is stagger to the marker, set the bouquet in its mason jar down at the foot of the stone, and stagger back out, your eyes burning, struggling to breathe.

You’re doubled over, gasping for air, when you hear the voice. “I didn’t think you’d come this year.”

Your stomach lurches. You stagger backwards, foot-first into another deathsite, and struggle to get your balance, searching for a safe place to stand. “Because of the rain,” the voice continues, raspy and rough. His voice. “How long are you going to keep this up?”

You’ve always thought your quirk might snap your mind someday. You just didn’t expect it to happen like this. If you’re already crazy, you might as well answer him. “Until I stop seeing it.”

“Forever.”

It’s been eight years. Nothing else has clung to you like this. “Yeah. I guess so.”

“Forever,” the voice repeats. “I never stopped seeing it, either.”

You’re talking to a dead person. A ghost. You’ve walked over hundreds of death sites, and you’ve never met a ghost before. But if anybody was going to become a ghost, it would be him, wouldn’t it? Unhappy, unable to let go, unmissed and unmourned by anyone but you, and you can barely be called a mourner when the most you do is show up with flowers one day a year. He probably hates flowers, and hates you, like he hated everything before. “I’m sorry,” you say. Shigaraki Tomura’s ghost makes a questioning sound. “I’m sorry no one saved you. I wish it wasn’t too late.”

You turn and leave without another look at the death site, and Shigaraki Tomura’s voice follows you. “Maybe it’s not.”

You’re losing it. You really must be. As soon as you get home, you’re taking a leave of absence from your horrible job and going to therapy, so you can learn how to live with your quirk and not let it cling to you and leave a bouquet at a supervillain’s death site without having a psychotic break. Maybe it’s not too late. What does that mean? It means you’re going crazy. That’s all this was. You walk stiff-legged across the battlefield, sicker with every step, never looking back. If you see his ghost hovering over the death site, you’re going to lose your mind for good.

Curiosity gets the better of you, though. You look back just once, once there are no more death sites to walk over and the only memories in your head belong to you. Shigaraki’s death site is easy to miss if you don’t know what to look for, but you know what to look for – and even from this distance, you can see that the bouquet you left for him is gone.

[that-hazbin]

Your angel AU now has me by the THROAT.

I’m assuming that Alastor goes to Hell basically immediately after Emily tells him that Lucifer Fell and hopes that Lucifer didn’t just forget about him (even if everyone else had).

That reunion will be messy, and I think that in a way Lucifer didn’t forget about Alastor—I am now convinced that the apple on Lucifer’s hat is the one he meant to give Alastor and no one can convince me otherwise—but thoughts of him kind of fell to the wayside as other things took priority. I imagine Lucifer will be a mix of happiness to see Alastor, and horrified guilt because he was left in that garden for 10,000 years alone and it’s his fault. You said this whole idea was based on Spinel, so I’d think Alastor is a mix of terrible sadness and frothing fury, oscillating between the two in turns.

You have set up a situation that will have severe emotional repercussions that are delicious to contemplate; thank you for sharing your ideas and writing with us, and I respectfully request more.

I shortened a lot of this AU because I wanted people to make their own thoughts on it, but I've got a lot of personal thoughts for it that makes it fun. One of them is that in this AU, Alastor doesn't have wings. He was made for Lucifer as basically his doll, and so he wasn't allowed flight. If he needed to go anywhere, he needed Lucifer to fly him around. So leaving Heaven to get to Hell would, in fact, be really difficult. He can't just fly down the way Adam and his exorcists can.

Granted, since Lucifer fell, maybe Alastor thinks "alright I'll do that too" and just bodily throws himself over the edge. That would be a NASTY reunion for Lucifer. Sees some meteor falling from Heaven, flies up to stop it, only to realize "Hey wait is that a person— IS THAT ALASTOR?!"

Meanwhile Emily, who witnessed this poor WINGLESS guy JUMP FOR HELL, is frantically trying to call up Charlie and give her like. A warning. Perhaps an explanation.

Lucifer and Alastor would have the most messed up reunion in this case. Alastor is still operating on the idea that his whole existence is to please Lucifer in some way, specifically to make him happy, to entertain him. In Lucifer's mind, this means that Alastor literally condemned himself to the most painful action in existence because of HIM. He never managed to give Alastor the fruit of knowledge like he planned, and it resulted in this.

Unbeknownst to Lucifer, Alastor isn't completely bereft of free will. Otherwise, he wouldn't be... feeling the emotions that he's feeling. He's hurt, saddened, and filled with so much anger. And Alastor is not going to direct that anger at Lucifer, of course not, it's not his fault that Alastor waited for ten-thousand years for no reason. (Except, it kind of is, but NO IT ISN'T.)

Things will hit a boiling point, though, when Lucifer suggests getting Alastor back into Heaven. Because obviously Alastor doesn't deserve to be in Hell, it sucks here, and Alastor deserves better— except that's not what Alastor hears. What Alastor hears is that despite waiting several millennia for this moment, Lucifer doesn't actually want him around and is planning on getting rid of him. Wiping his hands of him. Why not, right? Every other angel in Heaven has forgotten about his very existence, and here's Lucifer, the one he was made for, trying to do the same!

Alastor would just. Explode. He's confused and so, so furious. What exactly did he do wrong this time? Why isn't his friend happy to see him, why doesn't he want Alastor to stay? Is he seriously going to abandon Alastor AGAIN?! TEN THOUSAND YEARS! He can't do it again, he can't.

It would take a while before Alastor calms down.

[avidredux]

Magic Sword

so this is one of my favorite installments of linked universe and i'm going to ramble about why

magic sword takes place right after divine dark reflections, legend is no longer a rabbit, sky is established as being a shit long distance runner, and we get what i'd argue is one of the finest demonstrations of hyrule as a character and fighter. we also get some of my favorite panels in the series, like this one

i love looking down on him

anyway starting with some general Stuff That I Enjoy on a technical level! (under the cut because this got LONG)

first the color palette of this update is so so cool, lots of lovely reds and purples. the shading is amazing, like this panel here

simple but effective! the backlighting is dramatic and interesting, and i'm always a sucker for a silhouette (or nearly a silhouette) shot.

i love the black speckles and splats of the black blood throughout this update, and the way the rest of the colors are almost a gradient through the whole thing, it starts very natural toned, and as the fight intensifies gets darker, more purple and deep red and blue, all in sharp contrast with the blinding yellow and red of fire. it's a neat detail that if i'm not mistaken shows up in quite a few updates. the colors in the comic series as a whole blend in to each other within updates, a smooth, easy for the eye to follow change.

another thing is the paneling itself. the diagonal shapes of the panel help with that movement feel obviously, but also the framing of the characters. the panel up there (looking down on wars) is much more obviously a panel looking down on wars when you can see the slanted edge of the panel, augmenting your perspective of him to make him appear smaller! a neat detail that i didn't consciously realize was there until i had taken a screenshot and seen that he didn't look nearly as tiny as he does in the comic itself.

the angled panel, pov shot, and juxtaposition of wars and moblin, it all adds to the experience of looking down on him

the lack of speech in this one is another big reason i love this update. i'm always a fan of silent updates (or mostly silent, as the case may be) because... well link is a silent hero, it wouldn't feel right for these links to be quipping like mcu characters in the middle of a fight; the lack of talking keep the eye moving, keeps the anticipation building as the fight gets bigger and bigger. it's one of those updates i've come back to time and time again and i'm always seeing new little details because without words in the way, it's almost difficult to take my time "reading" this one, i get too excited!

now onto the actual characters! wars and hyrule are in my top 3 (technically 4 because wars and legend are in a constant fight for second place) in the chain. this update, coupled with their appearance in the divine dark reflections arc, is kind of what led me to loving them in the first place, and for hyrule especially, it establishes some awesome stuff about him with very little.

we obviously get to see wars take down a few of the monsters and kick some ass, showing his bravery against a much larger foe, etc etc but this ain't about him (even though i do love him)

he also does a spin attack! still not about him tho

this is about hyrule.

LOOK AT HIM. LOOK. good. moving on.

this is one of the first moments with hyrule demonstrating his confidence in his skills. though he says in an earlier installment that he, "must have had it easy," (ironic, considering his games), he doesn't seem to doubt his actual capabilities, just what he went through. and, yeah, as difficult as his games are, most of what he went through was just fights. maybe getting jumpscared by aches here and there, and yeah the whole "monsters gunning for his blood" thing, it certainly wasn't a walk in the park but in his eyes, at least he has his memories. at least he wasn't sent on like 6 different adventures before he hit 20. he's a glass half full guy, he's not going to look at his adventures against theirs and come to the conclusion that he was unlucky.

what he does have utmost confidence in is his fighting. this isn't the first time he's been a competent fighter (the second installment sees him finishing off the moblin with his iconc downward jump strike) but it is one of the first instances of him acknowledging he's a badass. a cocky bit of lightening and a smirk and jojo establishes that hyrule knows his power. hyrule knows he could wipe the floor with a horde of monsters, no problem. and he does!

though not without getting knocked down, which brings us to, not another Big establishing moment, but a smaller one, one that pays off later when twilight nearly kicks the bucket

someone call chumbawamba

his tenacity. get knocked down, get back up. he immediately cuts this lizalfos's tail off and we get this banger of a panel

love his smirk here, he seems to like fighting quite a bit

it's a smaller detail, and when the others get knocked off their feet they tend to get up too ofc, but it's so focused on in this update compared to in other updates, like here where when hyrule gets whipped with a tail, wild kills the lizalfos, and the comic moves on to warriors. intentional foreshadowing of hyrule's life savingly perseverant nature or not, i think it's a great moment for him

speaking of saving lives, his MAGIC

probably one of the coolest panels in lu and i swear i'm not biased

one of the coolest things about hyrule (and indeed AoL, one of my favorite zelda games) is his magic! he's got a number of spells, and if i'm not mistaken he's actually used his Jump spell in the comic before this point (when he does that cool aforementioned jump strike) but his first obvious magic (spells that someone not knowing his games would recognize as magic and not him maybe jumping out of a tree) are a little bit of Thunder in the first panel of this update, and of course Fire.

it really sets him apart from the other links, since none of this is from special items. he just... has magic ability and learns some spells that he now uses in battle to devastating effect (if you're a monster at least) i love the dichotomy of him being The Classic Link, humble and brave and strong and just, while also being a bit of a black sheep with his use of magic. it's a great mirror to how his games are perceived irl

now on to some of my favorite bits just for fun

love the sequence of them saving each other back to back

i'm sure wars is rethinking everything he knows about this guy

love this panel, hyrule makes amazing faces throughout lu but this is one of my favorites, just resonates with me

SIR

screams until i throw up this one is iconic I LOVE HIM also the magical sword is so so pretty i can't believe i didn't mention it sooner like fi i love you but damn hyrule has a fine weapon

head in my hands i love these guys so bmuch

i have to include this bit from the update right before this one

i love them

anyway thanks for reading if you got this far! this is dedicated to @esthelle-wanders who commented on another post of mine and spurred me to finally write this up! i hope you enjoy it!

all artwork is from @/linkeduniverse

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Weekend Ramblings

Thame·Po Episode 10

Yeah, I'm late but my brain was not working properly on friday, so, now works. Congrats on the sex! I love this friend group so much. This episode was a lot. First of all Baifern needs to go touch grass. I did appreciate that the show went there, all things considering, but she made me mad. And not that I needed more proof, but Po is a better person than me. Also I hate Pemika and this whole thing around idols and dating. It's insane, but obviously eventually the company will come around, cause glass houses and all that. The PepperGam noble idiocy thing was a bit whatever, although still heartbreaking, but I'm hoping this means that our mains won't follow in their footsteps. This show is as close to perfection as I have seen from gmmtv in a while, so let's not ruin it. The best part was definitely seeing the group supporting each other. The hand holding at the press conference had me all emotional. I'm giving up on screaming at Thame. I guess since they were technically already caught, he's not bothered. Not that he acted like he ever was. Thame and Po continue to be them. I just love how even through all this, they keep checking in on each other.

GelBoys Episode 2

Never has a show made me feel so ancient. Also this show is a massive reminder of how much I absolutely hated all that love drama in high school. I had zero patience for it. Obsessively rereading messages, overanalysing every word to find some hidden meaning, wondering, Does he actually like me? Honestly, I’m exhausted just thinking about it. And on top of that, I’m beyond grateful that I didn’t have to deal with any of it in the era of smartphones, social media, selfies, apps, and so on. So much angst. I guess playlists are the new mixtapes. It's certainly easier. I continue to really like the atmosphere, it feels very grounded. And although I like Fou4Mod, I adore Baabin, so I'm not a huge fan of the way Fou4Mod is using him to make Chian jealous. Like since he's his bestie, he could've at least been honest. I'm sure he'd be on board. And I know he's gotta learn this for himself but, Fou4Mod, sweetie, this is a terrible idea. You are going to be crying a lot on that train in the future. But, I mean, who hasn't done that before?

Perfect 10 Liners Episode 17

I got YothaGun and PondSand. What a joy! I really could watch Perth do anything but seeing him being the biggest love sick puppy is a special treat. Faifa seems to have a bit of a savior complex, which we kinda knew but it's pretty obvious now. I love characters that hide their pain behind a smile, and he's so kind on top of that, so of course I love him. I also liked that he noticed Wine's overall mood and checked in with him about boundaries. I'm hoping Wine can break some of his walls and perhaps teach him the word 'NO.' I'm thinking maybe we won't get a side couple this time because we have enough couples to check in with, in between FaifaWine stuff, but we'll see.

The Boy Next World Episode 7

First of all, it was great to see Thorn/Tong again, I keep forgetting this is part of the TharnType Universe. As I said last week, BossNouel can bring it in those scenes, but I still feel like I'm watching RainPhayu. Now Cir, you had to see this coming, no? I mean you only had like a million chances to come clean. I feel bad for Phu, but I gotta say, last week I thought he might have an inkling about this, but maybe not?Now…for that ending and the preview. So not multiple universes, but something else is going on. He's dissociating. I'm intrigued and worried if they will land this part of the story. It seems we'll be getting our beloved amnesia trope and I'm so excited about it. Honestly I was thinking maybe he doesn't really have amnesia and he's faking, but wouldn't that be a bit much, all things considered? I mean, they’re going to end up together, so I’d really love to not completely despise Cir by then. The second half of the episode was strange though, pace wise. It felt a bit disconnected, and rushed. Part of it might be intentional, given Phu's state of mind, but it still felt weird to me. The sides are kinda cute, although I must admit, Wim gets on my nerves a bit. That dude must end each day with a tension headache. Like seriously, he's so tense it makes me stressed. And also, why is he so annoyed by Jin?, cause like he listed a bunch of stuff but honestly I don't see it. Wim needs to forget about Cir for 5 seconds and focus on something else. This animosity feels a bit forced.

Sangmin Dinneaw Episode 8 [Finale]

I honestly don’t even know where to start. I’ve come to expect a certain level of whiplash from this show, but this was on an entirely different level. We went from child abuse and murder plot straight into that cucumber scene. I can’t even begin to imagine the thought process behind it. This was a roller-coaster, and not in a good way. That said, at least we finally got a storyline where a guy gets revenge on his abusive parents, so that wasn’t terrible. But the fact that the hotel dude didn't get run over is unfortunate. Now that it’s over, I genuinely don’t know what to say. The main couple was cute enough, and the sides were decent, but overall, this whole thing was a mess. Honestly, the ending was the only part that felt even remotely normal. And still I'm not sure about the amnesia. But who cares? Most of this makes no sense and I'm not gonna waste any more time trying to figure it out.

[variousqueerthings]

some things i like about ray and fraser that make them very different from dynamics that have similarish surface ideas

@pigtailedgirl this was the post i was working on (and then kept in my drafts for aaaages)

the fact that they became ride-or-die within a day of knowing one another. this especially on ray's side (i think pilot!fraser is mostly grieving and doesn't quite realise for a hot second how much ray would do for him, although it becomes apparent i think, latest when ray shows up in canada after having checked himself out of hospital post-got-exploded). this story gave us one scene of initial misunderstandings and then dropped all of that "unwilling allies" stuff that is staple to these kinds of stories and immediately changed gear into ray dropping everything for fraser -- his other cases, his family dinner, his hospital stay after getting literally blown up for him. and that baseline is only ever challenged once in the episode juliet is bleeding because ray is going through some seriously messed up stuff

burning down the house is a separate point i want to make, which relates to how openly affecting ray's leaving is to fraser. there's no trying to diminish that connection. there's also a lot of time given to the idea that ray hasn't simply "left" him, but is actively letting him know that he is thinking about him (that he promised to get in touch and then at the end he did). the emotional honesty of it without resorting to trying to diminish it for fear of seeming not manly enough. which, speaking of...

a lack of macho posturing. obviously fraser as a lead character not having this is very refreshing on its own, but there have been characters like that to an extent before -- the "oddball" to the "straight (literally) man." what's fun is that while ray is abrasive and at times challenged by fraser's worldview, he's never afraid of being emotionally open with him, touching him, taking care of him, letting him know how much he means to him. the show very rarely pays lip-service to more macho ideas about gruffness and not wanting to show too much emotion, and even then the actual dynamic is consistently the polar opposite of that, so much that it seems weird/indicative of something more going on when they do struggle to communicate

ray's caretaking -- speaking of all of the above, ray's core personality is based in many interesting seemingly conflicting ideas (he contains multitudes) and one of these is his intense caretaking of fraser both in body and soul. he tries to make sure that fraser doesn't physically hurt himself, while also teaching him to stand up for his emotional well-being. this starts way back in the pilot as well, when he helps fraser with his grief by offering a kind ear and making sure he isn't on his own (and is eating!) by making him come have dinner with his family. and he throws himself in front of a grenade for him. jeez. and then there's all the money he's spends on him.... and the riv (RIP. three times)

also. i like that they're playful with one another, again, from very early on. there's a sense of mutual respect in that playfulness, they're on the same wavelength practically immediately and it comes out in the ease with which they joke around with each other

i like when they argue, which happens rarely, but when it does, reads as duos (duets) arguing together rather than trying to tear each other down (handbooks for good relationships), that is, almost always (juliet is bleeding aside, but fraser knows this) when they argue, it's because of something that frustrates in relation to wanting to get closer to one another, rather than trying to hurt each other or feeling bitter/jealous/unkind about each other. the closeness is for example ray pointing out how fraser's tendency towards putting Duty first hurts both of them, or that he thinks fraser should acknowledge his less overtly positive emotions (feel his feelings) and in fraser it's pointing out that ray needs to be less self-conscious or societally bound at times where he's being prejudiced (at the bdsm club, about drag) and also in asking ray to trust his sleuthing (which ray pretty much always does especially as we move into s2, but he allows himself to ask for proof), which are both things that free ray from societal constraints and also allow him to get closer to fraser

in essence i like that the core concept of them is ray (tired, bitter, just getting on with the damn day after day after day) searching for something and that "something" is everything that fraser embodies, and ray's Mission almost from the moment they meet becomes to protect and preserve fraser's innermost needs, so that he can continue to be those things and that he learns from that and trusts that he is not so dissimilar to fraser in some ways (my man... got blown up.... and then went to canada... pilot episode..... he just needs to believe he has more value)

and that for fraser (emotionally closed off but simultaneously bad at setting any kinds of boundaries, too trusting but also doesn't allow himself to be vulnerable, not used to being put first including by himself) ray allows him to become more playful and open and not be afraid of being vulnerable for potentially the first time since he was a child, to let down his guard and not be constantly bound to his idea of Duty and Service, and yeah, to be a bit selfish

and they're never scared of being these things with each other. it's just very refreshingly poking holes in tropes

[pangaeaseas]

Sirius Black: The Perfect Scapegoat

made a post like this once but it wasn't very good so i'm going to say again that Sirius being framed as Voldemort's right hand man, which seems obviously ridiculous on the face of it, actually makes sense.

Like yeah, anyone with any detailed knowledge of the war (so order members, probably ministry workers highly involved in the war effort', and death eaters) would know that Sirius's real crime wasn't being Voldemort's right hand man--that title would more accurately go to someone like Lucius Malfoy (poor imperius victim) or Bellatrix Lestrange (seems to have been captured after Sirius and sexism works against her)--Sirius's real crime was being a spy for Voldemort and betraying the Potters, then killing witnesses in an effort to cover this up. So on the face of it it seems odd that the popular imagination would call Sirius the right hand man of Voldemort. Especially considering that it seems unlikely someone who graduated Hogwarts in 1978 would have a prominent position in Death Eater hierarchy when you remember the war had been going on for eight years by then.

However, no one with knowledge of the 'real' situation would actually have any interest in correcting the narrative of right hand man Sirius once it emerged (and it's entirely possible the Ministry had a hand in this misconception emerging, because it's a very convenient misconception).

The Death Eaters would have known full well that Sirius wasn't a prominent member of Death Eater leadership, and might have even suspected he wasn't even the Order spy, but no Death Eater was going to stand up and say 'hey, as a Death Eater, I know Sirius Black wasn't one!" It's very convenient misdirection for them: Sirius's associates, which by the time of his arrest would be unlikely to include actual Death Eaters as he'd left his real Death Eater relatives behind years ago, would have public opprobrium and suspicion fall on them. Anyone investigating Death Eaters starting from the assumption that Sirius Black was a prominent member of the leadership will go barking straight up the wrong tree. Sirius the motorcycle-riding rebel against pureblood hierarchy is a useful person to accuse of being a Death Eater: the real problem is men with long hair who love Muggles and hate our family values. The problem is societal outcasts, not upstanding citizens. And Sirius is just believable enough as a Death Eater too: he has a history of doing dangerous things at school, his family is famous for its use of Dark Magic, and he looks pretty guilty because he was caught laughing in the blown up street. It's also helpful if you are a Death Eater using the Imperius Defense for there to be a 'real' Death Eater caught. You could blame Sirius for imperiusing you, and you can also point to him if anyone says 'hmm, seems awful strange all the accused Death Eaters got the Imperius Defense, maybe some of them are lying' because he's the exception that proves the rule, the one real Death Eater who can be used to deflect accusations of faking the Imperius Defense.

In the context of only a few people being found guilty of willingly being Death Eaters, it also makes a lot of sense that the public would see Sirius as a prominent Death Eater: there simply aren't many openly known Death Eaters to pick from! Sirius's accused crime seems to have made a strong impression on people. And the other Death Eaters we know were sent to Azkaban or publicly just weren't as exciting, I guess--Rookwood was boring, a spy within the Unspeakables, Bellatrix was a woman, Barty Crouch Jr was a poor innocent baby, Karkaroff was a foreigner and a spineless worm, Snape was a spy for Dumbledore, the Lestrange brothers are just boring I guess (and Sirius seems to have been arrested before BCJ and the Lestranges so he was first. Yay priority.)

Dumbledore doesn't have any reason to correct the idea that Sirius was a prominent figure in the Death Eater hierarchy either. He thought Sirius was a spy, so had no reason to intervene on his behalf. I also think it would have been embarrassing for him to have trusted the spy and gotten his Order members killed, so why would he publicize his own failure? It's a pride thing. Sirius the right hand man is way less embarrassing than Sirius the spy even Dumbledore missed.

And in the Ministry's effort to restore public order and avoid panic, Sirius was a very useful instrument. Here is a successfully caught Death Eater! No need to worry! Also he's just crazy and Not Like Us. He's not normal. Normal people aren't Death Eaters. Everything is under control. They also wouldn't want to publicize Dumbledore's vigilante movement either since that weakens their claim to be leaders of Magical Britain.

The public narrative of Voldemort's first defeat goes something like this: after years of war between Dumbledore and the Ministry against Voldemort, by mysterious unknown magical means, baby Harry Potter was able to defeat the Dark Lord Voldemort. This freed his many, many, MANY Imperius victims from their curses and allowed the Ministry to establish safety and security for the populace, after rounding up a few stragglers who in their madness committed isolated atrocities. Something like this broad idea is how people not heavily involved in the war would have understood it.

Every element of this narrative has a purpose. Open conflict between the Ministry and Dumbledore benefits neither of them, so the existence of Dumbledore's vigilante organization separated from the Ministry would not have been publicized, and many people who knew about it vaguely might well have assumed what Dumbledore was doing to gather fighters against Voldemort was under Ministry auspices. Harry inexplicably being able to defeat Voldemort discourages people from digging into dangerous magic to understand what happened and gives the public a nice feel-good story--and a baby is a more politically beneficial hero than young vigilantes Lily and James, who, to the Ministry's thinking, might be risky symbols especially given their mixed-blood marriage (if youbelieve that Lily intentionally sacrificed herself to kill Voldemort, the pureblood supremacy motive for this narrative is even more important). Prominent citizens accused of being Death Eaters were actually Imperius victims, which allows the Ministry to avoid reckoning with the depth of Death Eater penetration of British society. The Ministry had everything under control once Voldemort was dead, with Sirius and the Lestranges being isolated exceptions motivated by fanaticism and insanity.

Sirius's easy capture allows the Ministry to claim it had controlled Voldemort, and that he would never return. There was no ongoing war, and thus nothing to be dissatisfied with the Ministry about. The Ministry didn't fail to contain Voldemort, because it had successfully captured Sirius. Sirius may have committed an atrocity but capturing him (initially) wasn't difficult, allowing the Ministry to demonstrate its power and the correctness of its harsh anti-Death Eater policies.

And Sirius and the Lestranges are also ideal poster children for framing the Death Eaters as politically isolated crazy Dark wizards and not a movement with broad support. It's no accident that Sirius is called a madman, a Dark wizard without parallel. He's a mystery. He acted alone even though he was supposedly a prominent Death Eater--because there weren't many Death Eaters! No one supported Voldemort! Of course, there was actually far more sympathy for Voldemort's cause than anyone post-war would like to admit, and much of the upper class was heavily involved in the Death Eater movement. Using Sirius as the scapegoat allows for this to be ignored, because of instead of analyzing the ideological content of Voldemort's movement, which the Ministry absolutely wouldn't want to do because we know Voldemort was anti-Ministry, it can just claim that all of its opponents were crazy, like Sirius supposedly was. Instead of having to say that the call was coming from inside the house, Sirius the scapegoat allows deflection of any criticism of the Ministry, its response to the war, and Magical British society as a whole.

We can assume this is where the right-hand-man story came from, because the Ministry repeats this exact story--Sirius the madman acting alone--when it needs a scapegoat again, in the canon era. By GoF Dumbledore is no longer convinced Sirius was the spy, but we see both the Ministry and the Death Eaters, who don't want to act openly yet, using the idea of Sirius for their political advantage, making it easy to see why the false narrative of him as Voldemort's right hand man was so convenient earlier.

[urinarythreatinfection]

As a Shanks fan I need you to stop tagging your posts and making us look bad. The more you write the more clear it is this is a bad faith reading, bashing while not understanding the writing. Your only precedent on examining these characters is based on stacking morality points on how nice and good they are, rather than their roles in the plot and their thematic relevance as narrative foils, their longstanding history and familiarity, the continued relevance of their intertwined journeys and emotional energy in the story. You seem set on seeing them as abusive when that’s clearly not what Oda means, their character dynamics play a role in telling the story and I assure you it’s not a message of abuse. But of course, there are fans who think Nami hitting the Strawhats is abusive so I shouldn’t be surprised. You can’t even seem to reflect on your own self and realize your own views are infinitely more toxic.

So Buggy left when they were both 15 and traumatized and somehow thats the most unacceptable thing. Yeah, whatever, hate them for petty things, but don’t act like you have some superior understanding when it’s just the most typically shallow reading. Your dislike is your own, but policing others because you lack the ability to comprehend is not okay.

Is this apologizing business really some big thing to cry over? Shanks wanted Buggy to come with him, Buggy turned him down. They were ex-comrades and pirates, obviously Buggy was free to leave and start his own pirate crew, Shanks even said they both should. Many of Buggy’s complaints are just petty things Shanks probably doesn’t even care that much about. But to Buggy it does matter so he cares more about getting closure from that time. Shanks doesn’t even care about the fruit or the map, he’s just glad to see Buggy again. They might fight but ultimately Shanks cares more about Buggy than any petty grudge and is more likely to forgive and apologize for little things, even just jokingly or to appease him, because it’s not a big deal for him to do it. To Shanks, friends are what’s important, so words and actions needed for his friend are a small thing. Villainizing Buggy and resenting his rejection is probably the last thing Shanks would want in that situation. He’s not gonna be a spiteful victim because someone got mad and left of their own free will. He’d rather be a loser who apologizes and begs for his friend.

The whole issue with ‘apologizing’…it’s not a big deal. A lot of times it seems to be treated as a joke. The treasure map is supposed to be seen as a stupid reason not worth getting up in arms about. Buggy being mad over the treasure map is treated as a joke and an excuse as a way to cover up that he really cares about Shanks. But this whole thing just seems like you’re mad when Shanks simps for Buggy and Buggy acts like he typically would. How is it hard to believe that Buggy is important to Shanks and Shanks would express that to him? Are you really so caught up on just hating on Buggy’s personality and him being a regular pirate you can’t stand him being treated like someone important? He’s one of the Four Emperors going after the One Piece and you don’t think his desires and feelings have some significance?

Buggy may have left, but that was all within his rights to do so, even the other Roger Pirates left these kids. For the current Buggy to apologize he’d probably struggle to get over his feelings, but to Shanks why get hung up over petty grievances if it’s for a friend? That’s just their personalities. Sure, Buggy could apologize, but it’s just not like him, and it’s not even that necessary anyways. Obviously knowing Buggy’s character he gets overdramatic and too emotionally invested he can’t let things go, while Shanks will let go of things because he cares. Luffy too learns to forgive and let things go, it’s one of the things he learned from Shanks. We get hit on the head so many times by this kind of message. When Luffy happily bows down and passes up on the opportunity to leave Amazon Lily just so he can save a few people he just met…there’s nothing wrong with giving in and bowing down when it’s not worth it otherwise.

Shanks couldn’t communicate his real reasons and wanted Buggy to join him but got rejected, so as the Captain who was rejected by Buggy who was willing to be part of his crew, it seems like Shanks was the one who lost out. Of course Shanks longs for his friend and would care for him. Luffy would also chase someone if it was his friend. This isn’t an abuser and victim relationship, it doesn’t matter who was wrong because there was never any actual communication. We don’t even know Shanks’ perspective and his reasons, only Buggy’s, so we just see they had their differences and Buggy felt disappointed. They wanted to prioritize different things because that’s how they’ve always been as pirates, not because one is an abuser, they are grown men who used to argue a lot.

If Shanks wanted to truly protect Luffy he would’ve done something like actually reach out to him and communicate to him. Shanks knew the risks when he encouraged Luffy to be a pirate and return his hat. He knew Luffy would be in danger especially with his fruit. That’s how it is in the pirate world, you can’t make it if you don’t put your life on the line and fight others. Luffy had to survive and overcome that if he wanted to get anywhere near the New World, Shanks knew that. He knew people would try to kill Luffy, that’s how the pirate world is, but Luffy would never become strong if he didn’t experience that. Anyways, Buggy is obviously supposed to be a tame joke villain. He didn’t even kill the villagers in Orange Town, the villagers evacuated to a shelter beforehand and he just raids the houses and blows them up.

I think you have this image of Shanks as this delicate abuse victim and Saint-like Christ figure (ironic) when he’s just a pirate who knows he and others have had to make sacrifices. All I can say is, you really think that? Okay, can’t help you there. 

You just seem to really hate Buggy and refuse to accept any positive take on Buggy. You even hate him for harmless things he did as a literal child. You want Buggy to be portrayed as trash and dirt compared to Shanks, but in a ship where fans love both characters and Shanks cherishes Buggy that’s obviously not going to happen. It’s clear that you’re biased so you can’t reasonably have a good take on this, all you do is victimize Shanks. How hypocritical that you complain about others having no insight when you’re way worse.

There’s so much stuff about Shanks fandom to criticize but the fact that you fixate on Shanks caring about Buggy as the worst thing, that’s just mindless hate you shouldn’t be tagging. The best understanding of Shanks I‘ve seen was from shuggy fans, I’m gonna trust them from now on.

Also are you seriously trying to compare your petty hate of a fictional character to speaking out about the literal atrocities done by colonizers of America? Please think before you speak.

Okay im tired of explaining this just as is so im just gonna take bullet points and say my piece and thats it because ive made two posts now explaining as best as I can and still somehow its being misunderstood as me being some sort of toxic Shanks fan thats making them look bad for some reason. This is literally me analyzing him and showing the problems of Shuggy people don't want to accept.

"The more you write the more clear it is this is a bad faith reading, bashing while not understanding the writing." Im not saying this in bad faith. That is why i tagged it as Shuggy. Not for some sort of ragebait or to spew hate i just really want the dynamic of angst fix-it stuff to change or atleast be more popular. And again, I understand the writing perfectly well. I'm rereading the manga and literally have not just been saying whats on the top of my head im looking into it.

"Your only precedent on examining these characters is based on stacking morality points on how nice and good they are, rather than their roles in the plot and their thematic relevance as narrative foils, their longstanding history and familiarity, the continued relevance of their intertwined journeys and emotional energy in the story." If this is how even if Buggy is bad it means they can still be together because they work well i literally agree its the dynamic. I cannot stress this enough i don't know how this isn't going through.

"You seem set on seeing them as abusive when that’s clearly not what Oda means, their character dynamics play a role in telling the story and I assure you it’s not a message of abuse." Oda has included abuse, suicide, addictions in his story and you really think he wouldnt sprinkle in the fact that Buggy was an abusive friend. Im not even saying he 100% was i said at worst. An abusive friendship is different than one thats a relationship too, and again i said at worst.

"But of course, there are fans who think Nami hitting the Strawhats is abusive so I shouldn’t be surprised." What she does was objectively bad, and she's toned it down a LOT post timeskip. Part of her character development that now you can safely say when she hits they either kinda deserve it or she doesn't really go rough with it.

"So Buggy left when they were both 15 and traumatized and somehow thats the most unacceptable thing. Yeah, whatever, hate them for petty things, but don’t act like you have some superior understanding when it’s just the most typically shallow reading. Your dislike is your own, but policing others because you lack the ability to comprehend is not okay." I never said it was the most unacceptable thing, i meant it was the most shitty thing he could do. You mentioned somewhere elsr they were 15, which is true, but as time goes by and Buggy doesnt change that excuse is out the window.

"Is this apologizing business really some big thing to cry over?" Its a major thing, and is something thats used for Shanks to Buggy that is seen as a major thing i dont know why im being posed as overly dramatic when i say it would be way better if it were buggy apologizing to Shanks.

"Shanks wanted Buggy to come with him, Buggy turned him down. They were ex-comrades and pirates, obviously Buggy was free to leave and start his own pirate crew, Shanks even said they both should." You're acting like Buggy turned Shanks down civily and it was not a decision of emotion.

"They might fight but ultimately Shanks cares more about Buggy than any petty grudge and is more likely to forgive and apologize for little things, even just jokingly or to appease him, because it’s not a big deal for him to do it. To Shanks, friends are what’s important, so words and actions needed for his friend are a small thing. Villainizing Buggy and resenting his rejection is probably the last thing Shanks would want in that situation. He’s not gonna be a spiteful victim because someone got mad and left of their own free will. He’d rather be a loser who apologizes and begs for his friend." And this is the problem! this! Just because Buggy cares more than Shanks doesn't mean that Shanks doesn't deserve to be atleast understood. Shanks would rather act like a loser to get Buggy than value himself is literally a toxic behavior for relationships. I beg of you to think of this in real life. Imagine Shanks as some chick and Buggy as the boyfriend and its very very clear that you just brushing it off as "oh well Shanks can handle it" sucks! It sucks! I've seen relationships like that and they suck! Its okay for comedy the same reason Nami's hitting is or Brook's panty loving is but when you're writing or drawing it seriously you can't just paint it as something okay when the reason why Shanks would put himself down for Buggy is because Shanks is mentally unwell! He deserves a Buggy that would actually treat him preciously instead of the now normalized "oh you're trash but ill forgive you I guess" Its not even a point of "oh well Shanks wouldn't mind!" You're right! But YOU should! Because you are the outsider looking in, the one that can look through an objectjve lens where you arent a dependent man that needs any sort of companion.

"He didn’t even kill the villagers in Orange Town, the villagers evacuated to a shelter beforehand and he just raids the houses and blows them up." This literally doesn't matter since Buggy has talked about killing before and I don't even think is true. There was a shelter because he just likely didn't kill all of them, but "just" some. And doing that is pretty bad in of itself.

"Buggy being mad over the treasure map is treated as a joke and an excuse as a way to cover up that he really cares about Shanks." Here with the "oh but Buggy's just a tsundere" If i never do anything for you ever because you made me drop my icecream 10 years ago does me being a tsundere just make it okay. This isn't even fully true. It's not a cover-up Buggy isn't just some little cute tsundere he holds malice. He IS mad about that still its not a cover up because oh well he still cares it can be both, and its mostly just actual anger. Because why else would he bring it up even when he doesn't have to cover up affection.

"Luffy too learns to forgive and let things go, it’s one of the things he learned from Shanks. We get hit on the head so many times by this kind of message" Letting go and liking the person is two seperate things. You're acting like Luffy is just some angel when he has also been shown again to really not like Buggy and some people. In impel down he doesn't want to rescue Buggy but ends up doing so so he can get to Ace "which buggy tries to betray" and in basically every instance where Buggy is brought up around Luffy Luffy has literally only bad things to say about Buggy so idk why you're acting like Luffy is some saint that would forgive anything. Im rereading impel down and he also didn't want to forgive Crocodile, he just needed the help, still doesn't like Crocodile too. Luffy shows dislike, its just not super loud, he shows it through not helping. He even only helped Hachi during pre ts only when Nami said it was okay. Shanks doesn't forgive everything either. The lesson Shanks taught Luffy wasn't "forgjve everyone". Thats what Luffy THOUGHT it was when he was a little kid. But thr actual lesson was just to be more mature, to be careful. To not fight at every chance because you could be endangering others. Difference between forgiving someone and just letting it not bother you so that you can use them, as Luffy has showed.

"Buggy may have left, but that was all within his rights to do so, even the other Roger Pirates left these kids." Rayleigh leaving Shanks was not a good thing for Rayleigh to do, especially since Rayleigh also knows whats going on, but he just left a 15 year old to just deal with it because he wanted to toughen the kid up or something idk, theres a lot of "just suck it up buttercup" in One Piece because thats what Oda thinks is cool and nice and manly, he isn't perfect. Also Buggy did have the right to leave, the problem is that he didn't leave because he wanted to start his own crew or find the one piece himself it was just because of the conflict between him and Shanks. It was not a clear decision.

"If Shanks wanted to truly protect Luffy he would’ve done something like actually reach out to him and communicate to him. Shanks knew the risks when he encouraged Luffy to be a pirate and return his hat. He knew Luffy would be in danger especially with his fruit. That’s how it is in the pirate world, you can’t make it if you don’t put your life on the line and fight others." I agree with this and I also feel it was the right thing to do unfortunately, s Luffy has a huge thing he needs to do even if he isn't aware of what he's doing. However, this is what Shanks chose, Buggy didn't go for Luffy because he wanted to toughen Luffy up he went for Luffy because he hates Luffy and his strawhat that reminds him of Shanks and the fact that he's also developing the same complex with Luffy that he was with Shanks, though not as strong since they aren't really together often.

"But this whole thing just seems like you’re mad when Shanks simps for Buggy and Buggy acts like he typically would. How is it hard to believe that Buggy is important to Shanks and Shanks would express that to him? Are you really so caught up on just hating on Buggy’s personality and him being a regular pirate you can’t stand him being treated like someone important? He’s one of the Four Emperors going after the One Piece and you don’t think his desires and feelings have some significance?" I don't know how you came to the conclusion this is what I think. Im not against Shanks simping for Buggy, I believe Shanks would be a simp in any relationship, this is more about how Buggy reacts in turn. Would be fine if it was just some shyness but its not. Buggy's harmful. I really don't know where i said I don't think Buggy is important. I just hate him as a person. As a character hes funny and a good character objectively and I think that he matters in the story I just don't like him as him. I'm not some person that wishes he would stay unimportant, i never said that. This is not about the story of One Piece this is about Shuggy.

"Shanks couldn’t communicate his real reasons and wanted Buggy to join him but got rejected, so as the Captain who was rejected by Buggy who was willing to be part of his crew, it seems like Shanks was the one who lost out. Of course Shanks longs for his friend and would care for him. Luffy would also chase someone if it was his friend." Would missing out on being a crewmember of a famous crew not be way more of a loss than not getting an already disloyal person as a subordinate. Shanks was important to Buggy too, I don't know why you're acting like Buggy is so precious in comparison to Shanks that its only Shanks that could miss out. Also, my friend, did you miss the ENTIRE ARC WHERE LUFFY LET GO OF A FRIEND BECAUSE HE WAS DISLOYAL!??? Did that just disappear in your mind?? The difference between Buggy and Usopp is that Usopp actually manned up and apologized in order to get on the crew. The entire point of the last scene was that if Usopp did not apologize they were actually going to leave him! Luffy is different from Shanks because Shanks would depend on someone toxic, atleast in the Shuggy that's normalized, while its canon that if a friend was truly toxic and a crewmember was bad that Luffy would leave. Cmon man! Why are you telling me I don't understand the story like I'm stupid when you just completely glossed over water 7 😭

"I think you have this image of Shanks as this delicate abuse victim and Saint-like Christ figure (ironic) when he’s just a pirate who knows he and others have had to make sacrifices. All I can say is, you really think that? Okay, can’t help you there." Its funny how you say ironic when it is ironic. Thats the point. That Shanks is a sacrifice. That is what Oda is alluding to with Shanks if not consiously than unconsious. I beg of you to think about it. A person that has sacrificed everything, their dreams, their friendship, their sanity, and even their limb, for a God of Freedom to help free the world. That is what Shanks is, a sacrifice for the greater good. Just like how they were trying to portray Robin's death/servitude in enies lobby as a sacrifice for the greater good. It is not "ironic" it is the point. It is not the first time Oda has pitted someone as a sacrifice for the greater good.

"You even hate him for harmless things he did as a literal child." Ah yes the harmless actions like creating an entire fake devil fruit to eat so that he can pocket the actual one and sell it for money to use to kickstart his own crew and find treasure on a map that he kept from the same crew that raised him with care and freedom. He didn't just do that on a whim, he planned that shit. It was only stopped by Shanks interruption. If not he would've straight up left the crew that raised him and done what he wanted. Im not saying him being a child doesn't constitute some slack but theres only so much slack you can give when it was so very clearly thought out on his end to betray.

"You want Buggy to be portrayed as trash and dirt compared to Shanks, but in a ship where fans love both characters and Shanks cherishes Buggy that’s obviously not going to happen. It’s clear that you’re biased so you can’t reasonably have a good take on this, all you do is victimize Shanks. How hypocritical that you complain about others having no insight when you’re way worse." ????? You can love both characters of a ship and admit that theyre bad. Crocodile shippers do it all the time. So do people who like all sorts of other villians. Kaido, Crocodile, Akainu, a lot. It really feels like Buggy is the only villian that people ship and use while pretending like he's not been truly horrible. Zosan shippers are more aware of the toxicity that could be between them, and use that as a story point and not something to just brush aside or even romantisize without some sort of angst thing where they know its toxic. And their dynamic isn't nearly as toxic as the normalized Shuggy one. It really feels like you have more bias than me since the plot points so far some of them have clear holes or are ignoring huge things. And again with the Shanks thinking, a toxic relationship can be toxic while the victim thinks everything is okay. A lot of bad relationships stay relationships because of that.

"There’s so much stuff about Shanks fandom to criticize but the fact that you fixate on Shanks caring about Buggy as the worst thing, that’s just mindless hate you shouldn’t be tagging. The best understanding of Shanks I‘ve seen was from shuggy fans, I’m gonna trust them from now on." No. The understanding of Shanks that YOU want is with Shuggy fans. Because when you're a Shuggy fan you get to just deny that anything is wrong with Shanks mentally and that he's just a handsome man that can swoon over his lover and not someone who has very clear faults and mental issues. You can just pretend like Shanks is completely clear of mind so you can use him as a little puzzle piece to fit into anything you want to add a "simp" factor to a ship. Because if you really wanted the "best" understanding of Shanks you'd accept the fact that he is not a completely alright person. He doesn't "brush off" things like they don't matter. They hurt. He just holds it in. With Uta he bit the bullet and left for her sake, but he held it in. When he lost his arm and Luffy despaired we never saw him do anything to show distress over his lost arm, because he held it in. The only time we ever notice that he does feel pain is when he's talking with whitebeard and confesses to the scar on his eye stinging, and surprise surprise, it wasn't to vent his emotions, it was just in attempt to save Ace. Not for himself. He was sad that he's missing an arm, because in the same scene he even says "the scar that hurts most/more is my eye" not "the one that hurts" showing that his arm does hurt. Because losing a dominant arm would hurt anyone. Especially when it lost him Mihawk, another relationship he sacrificed to save something or someone. Yet unlike Buggy Mihawk still is somewhat amicable to Shanks. Mature. Even if he isn't perfect either (ex: completely okay with dying by Zoro's hand and doesn't have any goals now that he achieved world's greatest swordsman. His only friend was Shanks who he left once he couldn't be a suitable rival, showing a dependence on what he knows as Shanks was likely the only one that he had in his life to teach him any sort of friendship).

"Also are you seriously trying to compare your petty hate of a fictional character to speaking out about the literal atrocities done by colonizers of America? Please think before you speak." What the hell did you want me to do. Clearly just saying what I mean isn't working, metaphors are what usually help people finally understand. Yet instead of seeing the metaphor i used you just focused on that it was a cruel one like the point of me using it wasn't to show the cruelness. What other metaphor did you want me to use. You need to learn that a metaphor =/= me saying its the same thing. You brought that up just to make me seem like im a mindless hater that brought up atrocities for nothing. Do you get mad when people who talk about history compare the way slaves were treated to the treatment of cattle too? Since using your logic whatever a metaphor is must mean that you think they're the same thing. A metaphor or comparison is a just a tool. Unless you're gonna send some thing calling me crazy because i used another comparison.

[ninja-gooooo]

I’d like to know your thoughts on the boys (or just Lloyd) having a FAT crush on the reader ☺️ tysm!

This is the flavour of fluff that I crave.

Ended up writing a crap ton more for lloyd😭 but thats okay we love him.

Very very loosely proofread.

Ninjago crush headcanons (the ninja):

LLOYD🍏💚:

Theres two ways Lloyd could go about having a crush.

Pre Harumi he's pretty oblivious to it, if you dont confess first, he needs Kai to figure it out for him.

Post Harumi he's having a panic attack.

On one hand, he likes you- and he knows you. You wouldnt be anything like Harumi.

On the other hand, that's what he thought about her, too.

Either way, once he comes to terms with his feelings, hes like a puppy.

Hes following you around 24/7.

He thinks hes slick.

He is not.

Kind of guy brush his hand against yours while walking thinking hes being smooth with it, but hes so red in the face you think hes sick and take him home.

But you wanted to take care of him, he considers that a win.

Generally, he prefers to be near you. Not necessarily clinging, but always sort of hovering.

Ninja or not, he wants to keep you safe.

Goes out of his way to impress you.

Not well, but he tries.

Showing off during training, not very subtley bragging, ect.

With anyone else it would come off as self absorbed, but hes so flustered while he does it that it becomes endearing.

If he does manage to get some kind of physical affection from you, hes a mess.

Hold his hand while you walk down the street, you'll be able to feel his hand heat up.

He stammers. He'll be explaining something so well until you walk into a room. Then hes tripping over every other word.

All in all, it's pretty obvious when he has a crush, at least after he figures it out himself. And once kai catches on, you wont have to wait long before hes a mess trying to ask you out.

It's very private. He'll pull you aside, make sure theres no one around. Hes very nervous, he barely manages to get his words out. You'll probably have to say it for him, but it's very sweet. He just thinks you're the coolest person.

KAI🍎❤

Hes the opposite of lloyd. No stammering or panicking.

Hes all over you.

He'll always have an arm around you, or a hand on your shoulder. He loves touching you.

Hes warm. Really, really warm.

On cold nights he'll jokingly offer to share a bed with you and 'keep you warm.'

Whenever you two are alone, hes a bit more awkward. Lots of clearing his throat, shifting his weight around. He doesnt want to make you uncomfortable- and that leads to overthinking.

It's kind of funny- he'll go from clinging to your side to anxiously standing on the other side of the room.

Please reassure him, he needs it.

If you do let him know you dont mind his clinging, hes right back to being all over you- but when you're alone, hes a bit softer about it.

An arm around your shoulders turns into warm hugs. A hand on your back turns into holding hands. Alone, he treats you like you're the most precious thing in the world.

It actually takes him a little bit to build up the nerve to confess. He likes you. Not a one off flirtation, he really, really likes you.

Prepare to be romanced. Before he confesses, hes sweeping you off your feet. Dinner, picnic, movie, whatever your ideal date is, hes got it covered. He gets dressed up and everything.

But once the 'outing' ends, hes very sweet. Any cockiness in his voice dissapears as he tells you how he feels. You're amazing, and he doesn't want to mess it up.

Jay🐦💙

MY MAIN MAN‼

we've seen him in the show. Hes trying his best.

He REALLY wants to impress you. You're so cool, so obviously you'd go for a cool guy- right?

Hes being a showboat, flexing his muscles, showing off inventions, and stammering over himself as he tries to impress you.

You know when birds puff out their feathers? Think that, but the bird promptly falls on its face.

He just really wants you to like him.

But when he stops trying to impress you? Hes the sweetest person in the world.

Constant check ups. If you've been unusually quiet, he'll ask if you're okay. You look tired? Hes got snacks and drinks on the ready.

But if you have a really crappy day, you'll find him in your room, offering conversation, distraction, whatever you need.

He might as well already be your boyfriend.

He adores you. Every inch. If he catches you talking had about yourself he'll be on a rant about how amazing you are for the next twenty minutes.

He doesnt even actually have to confess- you can figure it out from that alone.

But if he DID confess, he tries really hard to do it right. He wants to take you out, sweep you off your feet- but you end up just staying home and playing video games.

He just sort of blurts it out. Very loudly, and very quickly. You almost miss what he says. But If you do catch it- and agree to go out with him- you're not leaving his arms any time soon. The next hour is him gushing about you as he peppers your face with kisses.

Cole♟🖤

He has a what?

A crush?

Huh?

He has no clue what's going on with him.

Hes not stupid- he knows about romance, but he has a hard time realizing it's something that's going on with him.

It's never been his thing- so when he realizes how he feels, hes pretty quick to tell you.

But before he figures it out, hes always helping you carry things.

Like, a weird amount

Carrying boxes? Hes got it. Groceries? Five bags in each hand. A book? Well, he doesn't mind taking it off your hands.

Physical touch? Words of affirmation? No, his love language is carrying things.

This includes you. If you hurt yourself training, or step off a curb, he doesnt think twice about carrying you.

Until he figures out he likes you. Then he thinks about it alot.

He gets into whatever music you're into. Anything. You can play the trashiest pop song in the world, and he would love it, just because you liked it.

When he does confess, hes very to the point about it. He just sort of says it. Not the most romantic thing in the world, but it manages to be sweet, coming from him.

Although if you tell him you like him back, he let's out the biggest sigh of relief. He was STRESSING, but he wouldnt let you know that.

Zane❕❄

Clocked it immediately.

Hes seen enough of other people's relationships to know what hes feeling. His hesitance comes more from trying to figure out why he feels the way he does.

He's a nindroid- should he be able to feel this way? He can feel everything else, why wouldnt he? But should he? Would being with him even be a fulfilling relationship for you?

He spends the next week doing research. How to be a good partner, how to go about confessing, how to express his affection, he becomes a walking boyfriend wikihow.

Hes confident. Hes done his research, he knows what hes doing. So, he takes you to a romantic setting- some kind of secluded park or somewhere else with nice scenery. He thinks hes ready to tell you- then he looks at you. Hes always thought you were nice to look at- but now? He thought you were stunning.

He essentially short circuits.

You have to ask him if hes okay a few times before he gathers himself, and manages to very formally get the words out.

Nya🌊💙

TEAAASINGGG.

It's her love language.

You will not have a moment of peace around this woman.

But her teasing is really her way of letting you know that she notices the small things about you. The way you wear your hair, the way you sit, the way your posture changes when you're tired- she notices.

Once in a blue moon, you'll be tired enough for her to lay off- the teasing replaced with her looking after you, making sure people leave you alone. She can be very sweet when she wants to be.

The longer she likes you, the more prone to the sweet side she is. A part of her wants to out right tell you, but the other part wants to keep things the way they are- she doesn't want to risk losing the sweeter moments you had.

She's faced a good bit of loss in her life, she doesn't want to add you to the list.

Eventually, once again thanks to Kai, she spits it out. She tries to do the romantic date thing- but it turns into a choir of teasing and giggles. She confesses through her laughter. Its adorable. She freezes when she realizes what she did- but then she repeats it, letting you know she meant it.

[dress-and-impress]

(cal if you see this pls dont read it has spoilers)

Now that The Dragon Prince Season 7 has been released and the processing has died down imma just share smth right her right now... the whole "Ezran vs Rayllum" thing did not affect me AT ALL while watching it. Was totally unfazed by it becasue I knew they were gonna all be friends again by the end of it... and have no opinion about who was right and who was wrong (That's not to say I didn't feel weird about it. I very much did). So, here is my presentive of each character in this situation:

(picture obviously from a poster of TDP promo)

Ezran:

As every Ez stan knows, he's a young king and has many difficult and challenging decisions to make. He was NEVER prepared to take the throne and when he did it was with such honesty, patience and love for EVERYONE, human, elf and even villain (as per talking to Aravos and Karim about their views and perspectives). BUT when the love he had got taken advantage of, he lost it. Like I would too if you spend all this time building a bridge (hypothetically and in a way literally) with people perceived as "the enemy". His perception of the world became a blur and the innocence he had was shattered in a million pieces. When Callum left he was undoubtably confused but MORE determined to put his fathers killer to justice instead of asking why (like he usually does).

Callum:

Now he's a very controversial side because you either love him or hate him. Very quickly though i find it really strange how he keeps saying that Rayla does everything for others and wants to do something "for her"; the quazar diamond scenario in season 6 and at the oddly adorable bridge scene at the end of season 7. To put it quite plainly, Callum has no idea how to make himself happy, so he makes other people happy. But you're probably thinking "Callum pissed off Ezran and ditched his brother for his gf". Yes. He did. Callum was a mediator in the situation (or tried to be) and once he knew both sides couldn't be happy he had to choose. Ezran, his half-brother and King who has kingdoms and allies that support him no matter what. Or the girl he loves and spent years thinking about and wants to make up as much time as possible with her AND who regretted running away without asking for any help from Callum.

Lets refer back to the moments before Rayla decided to leave (on Callums birthday). She was determined to find Viren and finish what they started and Callum didn't want her to so they made a compromise. BUT THEN Rayla left as we know. Alone. With nothing.

Rayla:

We have no idea what Rayla spent those 2 years doing trying to find Viren but lets list a few things we know (from when she breaks Runnan out of prison); She had to say goodbye to her birth parents who she thought she was going to bring back from Virens coin, is banished from her home and cannot go back and is basically determined to have some form of stability in her life. Quick note, Rayla and Callum are not concerned about Aravos because they think he's still in the pearly.

Rayla has made a lot of impulsive decisions throughout the show and it should be expected that she would betray Ezran's trust and make things difficult for Callum to prioritise the need to get AT LEAST ONE OF HER PARENTS HOME SAFELY. Her mind was an utter blur and filled with emotion she didn't know how to express. The only thing Rayla wanted to do was solve the problem. TAKE ACTION on the one thing that's making her feel that way. She's done it before and will continue to do it.

So to sum up watching that scene and processing it, you need to understand all sides. The emotion, the determination and challenges that came across the three of them. It gave their characters development and gave us an opportunity to explore WHY the characters feel the way they feel or make the choices they choose to make. It was never a "right or wrong" thing but more so gaining growth and maturity that decisions need to be made regardless of how painful it may be.

[just-a-little-unionoid]

In which Stone sort of has a daughter and Ivo and her are not getting along

so I've talked about this fic I started writing back when the first movie came out and since a few people seem interested I decided to post what I wrote back then to test the water

on the base concept this fic is supposed to be stobotnik but this first part doesn't even has Stone in it, as it is only the first encounter between Robotnik and the kid

it's also not supposed to be the first chapter and it's short but that's all I got the motivation to write back then and it's been 4 years so I'm just, I'm gonna post it now cuz that's long enough okay, we will see how it goes later 😭

for context this takes place after the first movie and will only be canon-compliant up to that point

also uh cw r slur??? idk I don't condone the characters' language but it's there

tagging @thebadevil @alexcole1326 and @nosebleedy99 'cause you commented on the other post

- Meanwhile a few months latter on the mushroom planet -

The Doctor was looking for a way on a tricky path, a collapsing old mushroom cap he needed to step on in order to reach a better point of view, when his appliances went insane: there was some dimensional shit going on. He heard a big crack, like thunderbolt, then the dimentional fluctuation faded away.

Maybe two hours latter he heard something again, but something small, something he hadn't heard in a long time. It was not the wind, not the mushrooms growing, not his own breath, not Agent Stone rolling away. It was something that moved by itself, something alive, something animal. It was footsteps.

He was prepared for anything, really, he was prepared for humans, talking blue hedgehogs, other feaking rainbow animals, dinosaurs that would try to eat him... He was ready, and ready to fight for his life if necessary! What he wasn't really expecting though was a child in some kind of safety suit shaped like a dress? With a lot of shiny technological device attached here and there. He didn't get to see their face a lot but based on its proportions and the way it was standing it was obviously a human child, or a weirdly humanoid shaped alien, because as far as Robotnik knew the probability of an alien species to evolve in the exact same way as human, if statistically possible, was very low, and the probability to encounter it even lower.

The child glanced at him for a second and didn't even look up from the touchscreen tablet in their hands when they addressed him:

"I am looking for a human man who was known on his home planet, Earth, as Dr. Ivo Robotnik. Would you appear to 1) know English and 2) have seen a human looking quite like you, in that the human male standard shape and size are similar to yours. He should have a pale skin and dark hairs, and apparently a 'glorious mustache'?"

For once he didn't really know what to say, it only took half a second for him to remember how to register English words but the kid was faster and after a jaded sigh they resumed: "Nǐ huì shuō pǔtōnghuà ma? Kya aap hindee bolate hain? ¿Hablas español? Hal tatahadath alearabiatu? Tumi ki bān-"

"YES I do speak English, and other language stoo, thank you very much. Who are you and what are you doing here anyway?"

"I am here to find the Dr. Ivo Robotnik, I have already said that. Are you retarded or something? If you are don't worry I can explain things again, more slowly, I am trained for that."

"I AM, Dr. Ivo Robotnik," he said, trying very hard not to break the child's neck. "I know you're looking for me, what I'm asking is why? Who are you and who sent you here? No. You know what in fact I don't care who you are. I just want to know who sent you. Which government or secret agency, that sort of thing."

The mildly disgusted and doubtful facial expression they made as they were double-checking his appearance was speaking volumes about their internal thoughts.

"I have no more time to dedicate to you. I'm a very busy person and searching for you already wasted far more of my precious time than you deserve. All you need to know is that a very important person want you and you will follow me now if you don't want me to make use of force."

And on that, the child turned their back to him and disappeared behind a mushroom.

Great. One of those child genius who thought they were above everyone else just because they worked for a random government. He should know, he was one of them. But that kid would learn soon enough what their real place was: down below.

He still followed them though, because they looked like they knew a way back and, well, even if he was smart enough to find a way by himself, thank you very much, the sooner he could beat that hedgehog the better it was. Also, he could just kill them after learning whatever device brought them here and no one would know.

–––

Soon they arrived to a more open area. The child seemingly took measurements, they walked around taking notes on their pad for a few minutes then stopped.

"Come here," they said while pointing the ground. "Don't move."

They took a device from their bag, some kind of tripod filled with wires and LEDs, and placed it on the ground. They stepped back and typed on their screen some more.

The tripod beeped and light beams came out of it, scaning the mushroom cap they where standing on. A dozen of flat devices escaped from the bag and and went to place themselves on strategic points marked by the beams.

The child then placed what looked like a power cell in the tripod. That blue glow emanating from it, could it be... But he had no time to think about it, lights amplificated by stimulated emission of radiation came out of the tripode and to the discs, reflecting into the others, and soon the whole place was illuminated. Reality torn open for the second time this day in a deafening din.

When he oppened his eyes again a ring, looking almost exactly like the one that brought him here, was now open on the ground before him. Almost, because it looked like it opened on a room specifically equipped for that purpose, and with the whole procedure to activate it, it could only mean it was a more primitive technology.

The Doctor looked up at the child, who was scrutinizing him for his reaction.

"I bet you didn't do that yourself, it looks just like this creature's gold rings portals," he said with a smirk.

"Yeah of course," responded the child with spite, "it's reverse engineering."

"Lame."

"Well at least I'm not stupidly stuck on a damn mushroom planet like an idiot. I favour efficiency upon ego, that's why I am here saving your ass and you are pathetically crawling over there covered in mushroom goo. Now, you will have to excuse me..."

They pressed some hiden button in their gloves and Robotnik felt something stinging his neck.

"...but I don't trust you."

The last thing he thought while falling to the ground and through the ring was: "But... That's my tech..."

[discordiansamba]

the only person outside of the monastery crew that knows rinka and rin are the same person are shura and the (now retired) shiemihaza. shura's not talking and shiemi's grandma is. as we all know. going to die before the story starts.

shiemi knows rinka, since he often accompanies shiro on supply runs before missions. she's the first human he's ever met that's not his mother that's not the slightest bit afraid of him.

local demon boy thinks girl he just met is an angel, more at 11.

shiro, to the other monks: ...i think rinka has a crush on shiemihaza's girl?

(he doesn't know if he should encourage this or not? shiemihaza doesn't seem to mind, but he's positive no one else in the Vatican would like it.)

rin is the king of saying shit he shouldn't know and quickly covering it up with my dad told me. hahaha! yep. that's definitely it. no need to question who else was around when you said that further.

the cram school gang at first only peripherally knows yukio's twin brother. he can see demons, but he's not interested in becoming an exorcist... until he is. he joins the class after their exwire exam, with little in the way of explanation.

once rin shows up, they see rinka a lot less.

(it will take them awhile to connect the dots.)

shiro still has kurikara. he never used it, but he also never gave it back. he gives it to rin as camouflage once he joins the cram school. you obviously can't use your flames, kid.

ryuuji: do you have a demon in that sword or something?

rin: uh. yeah! it's a... fire demon?

ryuuji: huh. what demon?

rin sweats. he's a literal fire demon himself, but he has just forgotten the name of every other fire demon in existence. fuck.

(shiro is trying not to laugh in the background.)

the first person to notice something amiss is ryuuji, actually. rin goes missing during the impure king incident. they figure he probably got roped into helping the main exorcism force, but shima, yukio, and konekomaru say they didn't see him there anywhere.

which is weird. rin's not the type to run and hide from a fight, ryuuji knows that much.

he doesn't dwell much on it in the moment, though. not when he has to deal with his only source of protection as he casts the fire barrier being the son of satan. this is not a position he wants to be in.

(shiro's a little busy dealing with todo)

...except. he has to admit. said son of satan basically saved all of their asses. he disappears right afterwards, but not before ryuuji sees something fall out of his pocket. when he goes to pick it up, he's confused.

this is rin's bracelet. the one he always wears. why does rinka have it?

(rinka meanwhile is freaking out. where the fuck is his bracelet. he can't look human without that. luckily, shiro has a spare so the crisis is averted... for the moment.)

shima: okay. now that we're out of danger, there's something i've been wanting to say this whole time.

ryuuji: what?

shima: did it look like rinka had just rolled out of bed to anyone else?

(they all think about it. actually. yeah. he kind of did. heh.)

rin, glaring at one of his t-shirts: have they seen rinka wear this. i need to start separating these damn things.

rinka: samael can you let me time travel back into the past so i can yell at myself for not studying math.

mephisto: no. deal with the consequences of your own actions.

rinka: you suck

rinka is fiddling with his phone. shiro looks over. he's googling 'how do you make friends'.

rin's cover story is that he was sickly as a child, and so was his mother. she didn't have the ability to raise yukio, so she gave him to shiro. rin moved in with them after her death, and after he got better.

yukio: nii-san can I call you back. i'm busy seeing the horrors.

rin: (<---is the horrors)

still rotating this blue exorcist AU idea from two nights ago, so I figure I might as well talk about it! the basic idea of the AU started with "what if Yukio was raised relatively in the dark about his origins, but Rin wasn't" and it sort of just snowballed from there, as things do.

on the night of his birth, rin's demon heart is never sealed. yuri calms him down all on her own, despite all of her own struggles that night. she survives childbirth, and pleads that she'll raise rin herself, so that he won't harm others.

(shiemihaza looks in her eyes, and this time, she agrees)

once it's confirmed that yukio is human, and has not inherited satan's flames, shiro agrees to raise him for yuri and give him a normal life. he keeps yukio's origins a secret from him, only vaguely alluding to the fact that he has an older twin brother who lives with their mother.

yuri and rin are confined at the Vatican, not allowed to leave the room they are given. yuri survived, but the traumatic pregnancy followed by the even more traumatic childbirth has clearly taken its toll on her. she is much weaker, and no one expect her to live long.

she ends up living for eight more years anyways on pure determination alone.

she raises rin carefully, teaching him how to control his flames and his strength. how to be kind to others, even if they aren't kind to him. rin grows up with a mother who is physically frail, so he learns to be gentle because he doesn't want to hurt her.

shiro becomes paladin. he visits yuri whenever he can- and at first, he's really just here for her. he still thinks she's crazy for thinking she can tame her demon son, considering what happened with satan. but eventually, he comes to understand that rin isn't his father.

(yuri learns from her mistakes. she doesn't repeat them with rin.)

yuri's health takes a turn for the worse in the twins' seventh year. she passes away after their eighth birthday. there's mutters in the Vatican about finally getting rid of satan's spawn.

shiro is not going to let that happen, so warily takes some advice from Mephisto. he doesn't trust him one bit, confident he's playing at some kind of long game, but he promised yuri he'd protect both of her children, and he intends to do just that.

he ends up making rin his familiar.

(he holds rin's hands and makes him promise that he'll never use his flames on humans, unless its an absolute emergency. the boy's spiral eyes are just like his father's as he looks at him, but the person behind them couldn't be less like his father if he tried. rin promises.)

for the first time since he was born, rin leaves the room he was confined in for so long. he's going to finally meet his little brother that he's heard so much about.

he has to wear a weird, itchy bracelet to do it, though. it's supposed to make him look completely human to even people who have a mashou. mephisto made it.

(it's a rosary, because mephisto is determined to be an ironic little shithead at all times.)

his mom named him rinka. when he goes to live among humans, shiro gives him the name okumura rin.

fujimoto yukio meets his twin brother for the first time when he's eight years old. he's a strange kid, and it takes him awhile to get used to his presence at the monastery. there's something almost... disquieting about him, but that feeling fades over time.

rin doesn't go to school. everyone agrees that's probably a terrible idea. yuri taught him how to read and write. shiro tries to teach him the other subjects, but rin's not very interested.

(he is interested in cooking, though. lifehack: teach the demon kid you are now raising how to do math via cooking.)

rin keeps his bracelet on at all times around the monastery. he only takes it off when shiro needs rinka.

yukio does not grow up seeing demons. he has been blind in his left eye since birth- but that all changes after an encounter with a demon right before he moves into the true cross dorms. he doesn't remember much of what happened. all he knows is that rin saved him.

he learns demons are real, and that his father is an exorcist. and that rin has known about this all along, because he's been able to see demons his whole life. shiro grits his teeth, and decides to enroll yukio in cram school, with apologies to yuri.

(he has a bad feeling that yukio's encounter with that demon wasn't simply chance. the demon sight that mephisto sealed away is back- and with it, the vision in yukio's left eye.)

shiro doesn't tell yukio about his origins, nor that of his brother's. most of the exorcist world has forgotten that yuri egin ever had twins. only a few choice people who lived through that event are aware of this fact. there's only one son of Satan, and he is the paladin's familiar now. that's common knowledge.

mephisto: hm. I have a good idea. let's enroll rin at true cross academy as well!

rin, who has never gone to school in his life: i'm sorry what.

mephisto: you'll be able to protect your brother that way!

(shiro watches yukio at cram school. rin watches him at regular school. but also at cram school, because he's there too as shiro's familiar rinka. yukio just doesn't know that part.)

(at least he finally gets an excuse to wear that cool mask he bought that covers the lower half of his face. otherwise yukio would 100% recognize him. and he very much does not want that. he'd like to stay human in yukio's eyes for at least a little longer.)