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swiftiesimonriley · 4 years ago

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hurts like heaven (divorced! frankie x lawyer! reader)

divorced! frankie x lawyer! reader, silver linings playbook! au

rating: teen (I guess), no explicit content except for drug use

warnings: depictions and descriptions of drug use (if this makes you uncomfortable you may want to skip this one), mentions of divorce and custody battles, mention of time spent in an inpatient behavioral health setting

word count: 3.9k (WHOOPS i got excited)

a/n: I am so excited for my first frankie oneshot!! thank you so much to @hailmary-yramliah for this request, I hope you like it!! here is my masterlist, and if you have any requests you can send me an ask! also credit to @hunterschafer for the beautiful frankie gif!!

"Mr. Morales, after a thorough review of the details of this case, including but not limited to testimonies of your close friends and NA sponsor, revision of your record, and speaking with the judge who oversaw the suspension of your pilot's license, I have come to the conclusion that you are currently unfit to have full custody of your daughter. I am hereby granting full custody of Eleanor Luciana Morales to her biological mother."

The minute Francisco Morales hears the words of the family court judge before him ruling in favor of his now ex-wife, he nearly passes out.

The former Delta Force soldier vaguely heard the protests of Pope, who is the only person sitting within the rows of seats on the side of the courtroom where he currently resides. He doesn't register his lawyer uttering a half-assed apology or even the cheers from his ex-wife and her family on the other side of the room.

All he hears is white noise as the judge bangs the gavel to settle the room, explaining that Ava now will have primary and sole custody and that Frankie will only be allowed supervised visits with a social worker, and that Ava can take her daughter home today.

Their daughter.

Frankie knows he isn't perfect - fuck, he is far from it but this just seems like a sick joke.

As soon as his license was officially stripped from him, he knew his marriage was over. The tension had started almost a year earlier when Ava suspected Frankie of using, to which he vehemently denied.

Of course, it was true, but how was he supposed to explain and admit to the love of his life that he needed the cocaine flowing through his body in order to feel anything anymore.

Things began to crumble soon after the initial suspicion by Ava.

The best way Frankie thought to deal with this problem was to put some space between himself and his wife. He didn't want her to see him when he was strung out and begging for one last hit - God forbid his daughter see him like that.

In a way, Frankie was grateful that Ellie was still an infant, and that she would have no memory of the fights he had with her mother over his addiction.

He began staying out late at bars and other places downtown where he knew he could meet his dealer and get more of his fix, trying to keep it as far away from his home as possible.

After a few drinks and a successful meeting with his dealer, he would make his way home where he eventually came down, the immediate rush of guilt and sorrow filling his heart as he would return home and see the bedroom door was locked, indicating he had to crash on the couch.

It was when he stepped through the threshold of his small cottage that he felt the shame bubble up from deep inside him, knowing that he couldn't just snuggle up next to his wife and pretend things were fine, or even cradle his daughter in his arms and rock her to sleep, as on these nights Ava made sure to keep Ellie in the bedroom with her.

Those were the nights that haunted him the most.

Breaking Ava's heart was something long in the past - and he knew she wouldn't be able to just forgive him for what he put her through. She was always the one to give people the benefit of the doubt - something he used to tease her about but now feels scorned by. She was the one who stood by him when he admitted he had a problem - giving him support and resources for healing all while lending a helping hand.

She knew he wouldn't try to harm their relationship on purpose.

But when his use began to impede more on their relationship, Ava put her foot down. She was getting tired of the cycle of hurt that came with each band of withdrawal and promises of this being the "last" time, only to see her husband relapse again and again. She tried her hardest to continue supporting him, her high school sweetheart, but she had reached her limit. She started spending more time with her parents, leaving Ellie in their care for most days so she didn't have to see her father stumble through the door after a night out.

Two weeks later she served him with the divorce papers.

Frankie knows that he fucked up, be he never meant to harm Ava or Ellie along the way, especially his baby daughter, whose brown eyes were almost carbon copies of his own. He can't even stomach the idea of Eleanor growing up without her father in her life - she is his whole world, and since the day she was born he promised her that he would always be there for her.

But now, his heart aches knowing he is going home to a semi-furnished one-bedroom apartment, no wife or daughter waiting up for him like when he returned from missions or deployment.

Francisco Morales was not one to take the easy way out.

He clutches his patient belongings bag tighly in his right hand as he walks out of the lobby of the inpatient rehabilitation center, scanning the outside pickup area for a familiar truck. After looking around for a moment a truck horn beep startles him, turning to see a familiar mop of black hair peeking out of his truck.

Chuckling to himself, Frankie jogs over to the passenger side and hops in, feeling Pope immediately wrap him tightly in a hug. "I missed you Cat," he murmurs into the pilot's shoulder, giving him a comforting pat on the back before releasing the brown-haired man from his arms.

"I missed you too Santi," Frankie sighs, placing his bag down on the floor at his feet, "I don't know how much longer I could stay there without seeing a familiar face."

Santi lets out a low laugh as he starts up the truck and pulls out of the patient drop-off area before turning onto the main road. The two sit in silence for a few moments as Frankie stretches out his limbs, turning his head to look out the window as they drive down through the city.

The black haired man knows better than to pry and quiz the pilot about his 2 month stay at the local inpatient rehabilitation center. After the fallout of the trial, things got rough really fast. Santi knew deep down there was a chance of relapse, even with Frankie left the courtroom promising that this would never happen again - but it was all too much.

At 3:11 am Santi got a call from Frankie.

By 6:30 the pair were at the very same doors that Frankie had just emerged, with Santi comfortingly rubbing his hand up and down the brunette's back and they waited to check him in and head over to intake.

But Santi doesn't pry.

He just drums a tune on the steering wheel as he continues driving down the main stretch of road in the city. He watches out of the corner of his eye as they get to a red light as Frankie fixes his hair, running his fingers through the brown fringe across his forehead and he lets out a chuckle.

"What's so funny Pope? I don't wanna look like I'm fresh out of the hospital." He huffs, looking over his hair again before closing the mirror.

To say Frankie was nervous was an understatement. He had been out of the hospital for less than ten minutes and he was already on his way to meet a new lawyer. His new lawyer.

The previous week Frankie received a call from Santi during his afternoon rec time. At first he couldn't make out what the other man was saying, he remembers huffing out something the lines of "are you fucking drunk?" but made sure to keep quiet as he knew some people in the rec area didn't take too kindly to brash language.

He then remembers the hearty chuckle on the other end. "No I'm not fucking drunk 'fish, I'm excited! I just ran into one of my old college buddies-"

"Do you mean fuck buddies?" Frankie teases, letting out a quiet laugh as he hears a scoff on the other end of the line.

"No you idiot! I didn't sleep with every girl I knew back then, I know it's hard to believe," Frankie lets out a loud laugh, "I ran into an old friend of mine who went to law school, and let's just say she owes me a favor and she agreed to take on your case! Fish? Frankie?"

The pilot drops the phone as soon as the words are processed.

He has another chance. Another chance to see Ava and his baby girl. A chance to get them both back into his life for good this time, now that he has detoxed and spent his time working on his coping strategies.

They could be back in his arms once again.

"Mr. Morales? Mr. Garcia? She's ready for you."

"It's go time." Santi nods, standing up out of his seat and motioning for the pilot to follow him.

The pair make their way down the white and bright hallways of the law offices, walking past several cubicles full of lawyers and other workers chatting away before coming to an office with a glass door at the end of the hallway.

Frankie nervously plays with his fingers as Santi knocks on the door, hearing a soft "come in" from the otherside.

He follows the black haired man into the office and freezes in his tracks when he sees you get up from your desk and rush to pull Santi into a hug. He tries to keep his eyes from widening like a cartoon character but he can't help it - Santi didn't mention how gorgeous you are.

He listens to you both talk for a few moments before you reach your hand out and introduce yourself, a light smile playing at your lips. Frankie nods and takes your smaller hand in his before watching you go back to your desk. You open your laptop and pull out the file your assistant gathered on the details of the previous case.

"Mr. Mora-"

"You can call me Frankie," the pilot interjects, his cheeks turning red as you nod and take a mental note of that. "Frankie, do you want to start off at the start of your story for me? I always find it more beneficial to ask from the client's perspective about the details of the case, it makes a stronger case," you say, picking up a pen and looking at the brunette sitting across from you.

Frankie lets out a small cough and takes a soft breath in before laying his cards out on the table.

Santi stays quiet in the seat next to him, nodding along at the details of the story and offering a comforting hand on the back as one of his closest friends speaks about some of the darkest points in his life with you as if you have known him as long as you have known him.

It takes about 45 minutes of Frankie's explanations and your questioning to get all of the information you need for the initial meeting, making notes of the progress the pilot has made within the inpatient treatment center as well as Santi's testimony. You put your files away in the folder on your desk and stand up, making your way over to the two soldiers and giving them each a handshake, telling them both that you feel extremely confident in this case, and that you can't wait to help Frankie get his family back.

You can't miss the way he breaks out into a grin, probably one of the first genuine ones in a while, and you see Santi nod his head approvingly at you before giving you a quick "thanks" as the two begin to stand up and walk towards your door.

Before they leave you quickly call out to Frankie, who turns around quickly and his chocolate brown eyes lock with yours.

"What's your daughter's name?" You ask softly, watching as his posture relaxes at the mention of his pride and joy. He reaches into one of his back pockets of his jeans and pulls out a small photo from his wallet and hands it to you.

You look over the tiny photo - it must have been from the day she was born. Her big brown eyes are the same as her father's, a small smile on her face.

"Her name is Eleanor, Eleanor Luciana," he smiles, a small tear welling up in the corner of his right eye.

A smile plays at your lips as you see the absolute adoration in his eyes as he talks about her.

You know you have to win this case.

You spend the next 3 months prepping for the case.

You know this process is not an easy one, especially for Frankie. At first, he came to your office twice a week in the afternoon right after his NA meetings, most times with Santi in tow. It was awkward at first for sure - I mean it isn't fun working with a lawyer about the bad choices he had made or the fact of the matter that he feels like a piece of him has died since he has been away from his family.

Santi helped ease the tension.

When it got hard for Frankie to talk about some of the details of his drug use, or the fights he had with Ava, Santi was there to help ease the conversation and help Frankie get through it. It helped that the two knew each other like the back of their hands, with Santi being able to crack a joke at a moment's notice and bring the pilot back down to the ground.

It was when Santi brought up old memories of your time back in college that you heard real laughter from the brunette.

They weren't your proudest memories, but the way that Frankie laughed at you and Santi's old college stories brought a smile to your face and gave you a feeling of butterflies in your stomach that you didn't want to go away. You knew deep down you shouldn't feel those butterflies, especially when dealing with a client, but something about the pilot made your heart flutter.

But the minute you would feel the butterflies, like after Frankie gave you a compliment about your outfit, you would feel the guilt wash over you in waves. Frankie was a father, a former husband who was working with you in order to win back his ex. How could you feel this way about a man who was fighting through hell to get his family back.

You were just his lawyer.

Seeing him open up each time he came into your office was something that struck you deep down, knowing that being this vulnerable is something that he doesn't take lightly.

The two of you continue meeting twice a week after NA, with Frankie telling you about his feelings from his meeting and talking about his goals for this upcoming trial.

You continue preparing him with questions you know will be brought up by the family court judge, focusing on his plans for the future after his discharge from the inpatient center, focusing on the changes in behavior he has made of the past few months. His answers become more confident the harder you work, and you feel your heart start to swell as he talks about how excited he is to see his baby girl again.

But you also feel pain in your heart at the thought of the man before you leaving your life after this week.

It's the Friday night before the trial, a night you typically take off early on, but tonight is different.

Frankie was sitting here in your office earlier this week when he casually mentioned that he was getting his 6 month sober chip on Friday. Upon hearing this news you gasp and stand up from your desk, your feet carrying you over towards him before you could even register what you are doing - suddenly you realize that you have pulled him into your arms.

Frankie is shocked at first, a small "oof" escaping his lips as you held onto him, but he is grateful you cannot see the blush rising on his cheeks.

You quickly pull yourself back and subconsciously smoothing out your light green work pants before taking a step back. "I'm so proud of you 'Cat, that's so amazing!" You smile, brushing a piece of hair back behind your ear.

The pilot nods, a small smile playing at his lips.

"How about you come here on friday. You, me and Santi can have some pizza and a beer to celebrate," you suggest, watching as Frankie furrows his brow before letting out a chuckle.

"You don't ask all of your clients to have a pizza party in your office after hours do you?" He laughs, taking his hat off and fixing his brown locks before sliding it back on his head.

"I can't say that I do, but this is what Santi and I would do back in the day to celebrate, so why not celebrate this achievement before we get in the courtroom."

You chuckle, remembering the days spent in the shitty apartment Santi had off campus. "Alright I'm in." Frankie smiles, "I'll bring the beers."

That night the three of you sit on the floor of your office like kids and chuckle at old stories, both from college and from the boy's times spent overseas. You watch as Frankie laughs at something Santi says and you feel the pain in your heart return, knowing that in a few short days your client would be back to his old life, and you would be stuck here back in the real world at your job. You know it's wrong, but these past months have been different than any other case you have taken on.

You know Frankie is going to be able to go back to his family after all of this - he is stronger than when this whole ordeal started and he has the support to prevent another relapse.

Hell, you are proud of him outside of work, knowing this process wasn't easy - but the idea of this man walking out of your life brings you sadness. Knowing he won't be in your office twice a week for hours, cracking jokes and talking about nothing in particular towards the end.

Sometimes you wonder what things would be like if you met under other circumstances. Maybe you two would have a shot - walking hand in hand at the local farmer's market, singing karaoke at the bar with Santi, Benny and Will, or even going on a flight with him.

You even opened up to him, telling him things even Santi doesn't know. But you need to remember why you are here - to win this for your client.

"Mr. Morales, after going over the details of this case, I see the dedication you have made towards your rehabilitation and future. I have talked with the treatment team at Maple Grove rehabilitation as well as your NA sponsor, and based on all of the information I have gathered is that you are fit to have custody of your daughter. You will now have shared custody of Eleanor Luciana Morales."

Before you can properly process the words of the judge, you feel two strong arms wrap around your torso and lift you in the air. You feel a blush come over your cheeks as you hear Frankie saying "thank you" over and over again as he sets you back down on the ground.

You both simultaneously pull back and hide your blushes as you thank the judge for his discretion and you faintly hear the bang of the gavel in the background as the court is dismissed.

You don't miss the way Ava storms out of the courtroom with her family and you have to stop yourself from rolling your eyes. Santi walks over to the two of you and pulls you both into a hug, rubbing a hand comfortingly up and down your back and thanking you for everything you did.

You nod as Santi pulls back and turns to his brother in arms, chatting about something you can't quite hear as you begin to pack up your white briefcase, pausing when you see a photo of Ellie on the table.

Since the beginning of the trial Frankie felt the nerves wash over him as this suddenly felt so real. You had suggested that he bring in a picture of Eleanor to place on the table so that whenever he became nervous, he could look down and see who he was doing this all for. Seeing the photo now brings tears to the corners of your eyes and you close up your briefcase - turning around to see that Santi has left the courtroom, just leaving you and Frankie.

"I just wanted to say thank you, for everything," he says softly, nervously scratching at the hair at the nape of his neck.

You nod curtly, trying to ignore the sore feeling in your throat - a telltale sign that you were about to cry.

Frankie tilts his head in confusion and walks closer, reaching out and grabbing your smaller hands in his. "I mean it - you have helped me through this whole process, and you are the reason I get to see Eleanor again, and for that I cannot thank you enough."

His words cut through you like knives - you knew this was coming. Your job is over, and it's time for him to move on.

"All in a day's work," you chuckle quietly, having to look down at your shoes to avoid letting the tears fall.

You suddenly feel softy fingers tilt your head up. Blinking through your lashes you see the pilot looking at you with only adoration in his eyes. You lock onto his chocolate orbs and nod slightly as he moves closer, softly crashing your lips against his.

You feel his strong arms wrap around your waist, pulling him flush against his chest in a soft yet comforting way. You find yourself getting lost in the moment, one of your hands tangling in his hair as he pushes a strand of hair behind your ear.

A moment later you both pull away, leaning your forehead against his as he lets out a small chuckle.

"I've been wanting to do that forever," he smiles, locking eyes with you once again, "I had to wait until I wasn't your client anymore, I didn't want to make it awkward or unethical."

You smile at his confession, brushing a piece of his brunette locks out of his eyes.

"Well now that you are no longer my client, would you like to go grab a beer?" You ask, looking at the way his eyes light up at your question.

"I would love that."

He watches as you grab your briefcase and wraps an arm around your waist as the two of you head for the courtroom doors.

He feels his heart swell in his chest knowing he not only has Eleanor back in his life, but now he has you too.

taglist: @hailmary-yramliah @babyprim @shadowolf993 @jasterslegacy @collectorofexperiences

#frankie catfish morales #frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie catfish Morales x reader #triple frontier #pedro pascal characters #my writing

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headoverheelsforramsey · 3 years ago

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Your Love Is Killing Me (Part 1)

Pairing : Dr. Ethan Ramsey x f!MC (Dr. Meera Bose) Summary : A canon divergent take on the emotions Ethan and Meera face on returning from Miami, and what happens when Meera faints in the hospital atrium. �� Category : Angst Warnings : A few swearings, PCOD and cardiovascular disease that comes with it, stress and anxiety Word Count : 1724

A/N : So this is my first fic,🙈 so please ignore some of the rookie mistakes, also please send in criticisms, I would love to improve. Got tired with clone Ethan and PB writers and the book 1 replay got to me so I thought torturing myself through angst will be a good idea. Happy Reading! ❤

Meera shifts in her bed. Rolling over to face away from the window. It was another sleepless night for her. Where usually she used to be famished after coming home from work and all she desired for was her head to touch the pillow the last 5 days was completely different. These 5 nights she spent staring into the ceiling as a train of thoughts ran through her mind. Dr. Ramsey's words kept on ringing in her head "I need to be able to push you to your limits. To help you become the doctor you want to be. The one I know you can be." Lost in her reminiscence of that magical moment in the balcony of the Miami hotel, Meera didn't seem to notice the sky changing its colours from the dark starry blue to the first hues of gold, orange and red, signifying the beginning of a new day. She turned over thinking what went wrong, a calculation she was doing for the zillionth time and each time she came to a fruitless answer. Meera was interrupted by the sound of her alarm, one which was useless as she wasn't able to close her eyes for a single minute.

She sat up in bed rubbing her eyes and catching a glimpse of herself on the full sized mirror. She was in her comfiest sweatpants, her uncombed curls sprawled over her shoulders and face. She removed her hair from her face and found tired eyes, deep dark circles and chapped lips staring at her from the mirror. She closed her eyes, hugged her knees close and rested her forehead on her knees as she thought about her plan for the day. For the past five days she had planned her days carefully so as to not run into the grumpy attending at any cost. She was on high alert. Any sign of him nearby and she always made an one eighty degree rotation in order to escape him. She went to meet the patient X to take his regular vitals and monitor required medicines on hours she was cent percent sure Dr. Ramsey was busy. She replied with lies and smiles to Dr. Banerji's unending question about the conference, Miami, Ethan and the sudden change in her behavior. Although she sometimes felt he could see right through her.

Meera stood up from the bed and went into the shower. As soon as the cold water hit her skin she remembered how Ethan had abandoned her in the hotel in Miami. How she had been sitting there on the bed dressed in luxurious blue with her heart and bed cold as tears swelled up in her eyes. She remembered the awkward flight from Miami to Boston and the bare three sentences of exchange between her and Ethan. How she thought that the flight washroom was her safe haven and how she wished to spend the entire flight there. All these thoughts were such an emotional burden on her and she finally gave in to the inevitable. She double downed with sobs as she cried in the shower keeping as quiet as it was humanly possible for her so that her roommates won't get to know. After a few minutes she was finally able to compose herself. She stepped out of the shower a towel wrapped around her as she rubbed her hair dry. Meera got into a fresh pair of scrubs combed and tied her hair into a tight high ponytail. As she applied a generous amount of foundation to hide her dark circles and chapstick to moisturize her lips her phone beeped with a notification from her period tracker which notified that her period was 3 days late. She didn't think much about that as she had been dealing with PCOD since she was sixteen. She had almost defeated the disease with changes in her lifestyle and a few medicines, but after all there is no permanent cure. She had learned to live with it over the years.

Finally she looked at herself in the mirror. She was now looking like Dr. Meera Bose the confident number one intern at Edenbrook Hospital. She forced on a smile to face her roommates outside her bedroom door and the world in general. This is what Meera's life looked like for the past five days. She was tired of putting on a happy show for the outside world and hence once she was inside her room with no one except herself her thoughts collided against each other and finally left her crying. She was tired of going through the same crescendo of thoughts and emotions again and again but there was no other way out because the only possible solution to end her pain, in Dr. Ramsey's words was "unethical and complicated."

It was noon when Meera was already done with 6 cases. She also made it a point to check up on Dr. Banerji first thing in the morning when she was completely certain Ethan was in a board meeting. She was once again walking the crowded but motivated halls of Edenbrook navigating her way to her next patient's room.

Meera felt a sudden piercing pain in the middle of her chest which slowly travelled to her left arm. It started as a mild one but quickly accelerated. From the corner of her eye she saw Ethan rounding a corner and walking towards her. It had been six days since both of them were in the same corridor. Before she was ready to process anything further she broke out into a sweat and started feeling tremendous trouble in breathing properly. All she remembers next is darkness and the sound of her charts slipping away from her hand and hitting the floor. In the last moments before her unconsciousness hit she felt someone holding her close and tight, the chaos of the hospital becoming silent to her as she tried with all her might to figure out if she had the opportunity to be in Ethan's arms once again like she was in Miami but she failed.

Ethan was very annoyed when he was held all morning in a stupid board meeting and wasn't able to finish any of his work. Ethan often doesn't listen to half of the things the board members say. He utilises those hours to mentally untangle the complications of the diagnostic team patient, something which he felt was much much more important than listening to entitled doctors who aren't even good as they think themselves to be. But today it was different. He was unable to concentrate at all. His mind wandered back to the one curly haired brunette intern. These past six days Ethan had immersed himself in work. Between the interns, the diagnostic team and Naveen's mystery illness his mind was pretty busy. He took on more cases than usual, pulled all nighters at the hospital and the little time he was at home he did find some article he needed to finish writing on his laptop. This was the only way he could keep her out of his head. Atleast this is what he believed, because work, patient care and her career was the only thing standing between him and her.

He was quickly making his way towards the diagnostic team office once he was finally freed from the conference room. He turned a corner and started walking through the corridors, pinching the bridge of his nose. That's when he heard a thud and saw a chaos forming around a patient who had just fainted, up ahead in the corridor. He picked up his pace ready to yell at the intern who was responsible for this. When he was merely steps away, he stopped in his track, completely recognizing that it wasn't a patient but an intern. The intern that topped the charts in the diagnostic team competition, the intern he was so keen on avoiding, and for the first time in years his doctor senses didn't kick in. He was looking at the intern, not as Dr. Ethan Ramsey but as just Ethan.

She was nestled in the strong arms of the Averio paramedic she was friends with. Ethan snapped out as the chaos became louder, a stretcher was brought and Meera was lifted into it. Surrounded by her intern friends and Dr. Delarosa, she was being rolled towards the ER. The immediate thing Ethan did was follow her, but that's when his pager beeped. It was a code blue from Baz. Ethan stopped once again evaluating his next step. He knew the diagnostic team was already understaffed and needed him, on the other hand Meera who- who- who was exactly what to Ethan he didn't know. Ethan did the same mistake he had done in Miami, he put his work, before her inspite of what his heart wanted.

It took Ethan twenty minutes to handle the situation of the Diagnostic Team patient. After which he was on his way to the ER, determined to check up on Meera. He felt, him running after just an intern would stir up the hospital gossip. But did he care for it? He didn't, until he heard a few nurses huddled together talking in loud whispers. "I think she is pregnant, Mary told me she was feeling nauseous the other day." one of them said. "Are you serious?? Do you think it was Dr. Ramsey ?" another one asked. "I don't know, they spent two whole days alone in Miami, who knows what they were upto." the first one replied. "You know, I think you are right. Dr. Olsen told me that she wasn't even half smart and intelligent as he was and yet she is leading the competition. It's very clear Ramsey favours her." a third joined in. "Whatever it is, I don't know what he sees in her. I could be standing her naked waiting for him to fuck me, but he wouldn't budge." with this the group of nurses started giggling and moved towards the atrium their back towards Ethan. After this encounter he couldn't risk being found close to her. It's her career that was at stake. Something that he priced over his own feelings for her. Dejected, he made his way back towards his office, locking the door behind him and immersing himself in paperwork.

Thank you so much if you have read till here, it means the world to me. I will put up the second part as soon as possible, till then sending love and hugs your way! 💖

Tagging : @starrystarrytrouble @mm2305 @charisworld @choicesfanaf @potionsprefect @genevievemd

+@choicesbookclub

Let me know if you want to be added or removed. 💜

Part 2 is up now! Read it here

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jtsfavslut · 4 years ago

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Falling [G.D]

Description: Just when Y/N thought she was over Grayson, he pops back into her life, making her wonder if you could fall for the same person twice. Inspired by ‘Falling’ - Harry Styles.

Warnings: None, Just sad stuff lmao!!!

Word Count: 4K+

Also a special thanks to cole [ @blazedgraysons] for keeping up with my annoying ass questions while I wrote this, and for helping me and giving me advice I love you <333

Her small feet carried her body down the familiar street, cars zooming past her as her body softly bumped into the others around her. The loud sounds from the environment being blocked away by the soft, yet loud music that was coming out of an old pair of Airpods she had gotten for Christmas back in High School.

This was Y/N's daily routine. Get up early in the morning, do her business in the bathroom, get dressed, and walk over to her favorite cafe. The Beachwood cafe had become Y/N's second home ever since she moved to L.A, spending most of her time there, before and after class.

A smile lit up her face as the familiar blue door came into her view, a content sigh falling past her lips as she got closer to the door.

The strong smell of coffee hit her nostrils as she walked inside, music being paused as she walked fully inside, giving her attention to the cashier that greeted her every morning, "Hi Y/N, your stuff is on your table," she smiled up at Y/N before pointing towards her usual table.

It was the one by the window in the corner of the shop, the bright yellow and blue floor illuminated her small journey to the table, where her coffee and breakfast sandwich happily waited for her to approach. She sat down, hand reaching into her Yellow Kanken backpack, another Christmas gift from high school that she dearly took care of, she pulled out a brown journal and a pen.

A journal filled with memories and random thoughts that popped in her head. Y/N thought writing things down was good for the mind and body. She believed that writing things down would help you keep your thoughts safely, and lock memories into place without overworking your mind. A pen that has been through many journeys on the same yet different page.

All pages were the same until the pen went over it, recording things until the end of time. They were all the same until she wrote down her thoughts for the day.

Her small hand gripped onto the pen as she wrote down her thoughts from the previous night, coffee cup in the other hand as she slowly sipped the liquid.

Last night I thought of him again, just until I drifted off. I don't know why. It hasn't happened in months. Nothing bad, just a memoir of all of our memories together. Like the time we broke into the school's pool one night. Where he pushed me in with all my clothes on, then he jumped in and we made out by the stairs. Funny how we never got caught since cameras were around us. Or when we had our senior trips to the mountains in Colorado, and how he kept sneaking into the girls' room just to be with me. We were lucky we didn't get caught again. I tried to not keep thinking about him. I know it's time to finally drop it and move on, but how? How do I erase all those memories from my brain? How am I supposed to just drop it and move along? Just how? I don't need or want to know why just how.

She softly slammed the notebook closed, right before she could feel a slight burning in her eyes and a rock starting to form in her throat. The subject of her and a past lover that she was still holding onto, still being a deep wound to her.

She thought about and remembered Grayson every day. After all, he was her everything during her entire High School life, and he still was…...sort of. Grayson and Y/N started dating in the 9th grade, right about in the middle of the year. He asked her out behind the school's bleachers during lunchtime, a mixture of flowers from his mom's garden that she shyly accepted from him after she said yes. That was followed by their date to the movie theater, where he held her close to him every time she faked being a little scared, not that he could tell, and three dates after he officially asked her out where she said yes again, and that was followed by an accidental kiss, he was leaning towards her cheek when she accidentally moved her head to the side, causing his lips to land on hers. Neither of them complained, just smiled at each other and carried on.

They went on for 6 years, all of high school and two college years, where he decided to break it off because of distance. He went off on how being across the country from one another was hard, and the fact that the time difference from New York to California was 3 and 4. She didn't complain. Didn't give a reason as to why not, even if she had trillions of them. She didn't try to change his mind. She simply said okay, and wished him the best. She still loved him though.

The words that her grandpa had spoken replayed in her brain every time she questioned why she still thought about him; "You never stop loving anyone sugar, you just kinda love someone stronger. If you stop loving them, then you never loved them to begin with" She thought about that, and that made her feel better. Maybe there was someone out there who she would love more than she loved Grayson.

With a quiet sigh, she put her journal away, switching it with a book she picked up at the library a few days prior, yet read a million times.

To Kill A Mockingbird is a book she read many times in school, mostly everyone has. It's the one book from school she actually enjoyed, so she picked it up from the book shop down the street from her apartment before work one day, and didn't get to read it until now.

She opened the book with a small smile, the sensation of the book against her finger bringing nothing but happiness to her, and took her mind off whatever was bothering her. She lost herself in the book, almost done with half of the book before her alarm rang, signaling it was time for work. She left a 20 on the table after putting all her stuff away in her backpack and walking out of the shop and towards her job which was a paid internship at a local hospital downtown, all she did was watch and help out with minor cases like cuts, sprains, X Ray's and the occasional stuff like questioning. She entered the hospital, sanitizing herself and changing into her uniform, walking over to her area, that being the Pediatrics Emergency room where her boss, mentor, whatever you might want to call him, Dr. Reyez, and the rest of the team were waiting for her.

"Morning everyone," she chirped at the tired yet awake health care workers, who all had smiles on their faces. "Morning Y/N, you're going to be practicing by yourself today, can you handle it?" Dr. Reyez asked her, which she just nodded her head with a smile. There wasn't a single ounce of doubt in her brain.

"I'm pretty sure yes! And I can just reach out to you guys if anything, right?"

"Yeah, just page us if anything. Your first patient should be here soon, just go wait by the desk," Reyez instructed her and that's exactly what she did. She sat on the desk for over 20 minutes until someone came in with a toddler covered in rashes.

"Hi baby, I just need to ask you and mommy a few questions, yeah?" She sweetly and patiently asked the 5 year old as his mom was filling out some papers, to which he just nodded his head.

"Okay, Xavion, did you eat something new today? Maybe something you've never eaten?" She asked and both the mom and son nodded their heads.

"Do you think he was allergic to something?" The mom asked, causing Y/N to shrug.

"Well, it depends. We need to get an allergy test for him. It doesn't hurt or anything, we just scratch and pour a drop of the allergen over it and see how they react. Mom, do you happen to remember what he ate today for the first time?" She replied by recording some notes down on her clipboard before telling a nurse to get an Allergy Antibody Test ready.

"He ate everything that he usually does except for some broccoli I gave him," the mom replied and Y/N nodded her head before writing it down on her clipboard and walking them to the testing room.

Once the results came back around half an hour later, Xavion was, in fact, allergic to broccoli, and other things that Y/N had to explain to the mother. She got about 15 minutes of break time before Reyez called her another minor emergency.

"It's an 11 year old, possible breakage or sprain to the leg, you can handle this one right?" He asked and she nodded her head, "Good, they're in room 217, good luck," he added before sending her off to the room.

She quickly made her way over to it, grabbing her clipboard on the way, "Hi, I'm Dr.Y/LN, I'm going to be taking care of you guys today! May I have the child's name and date of birth please?" She nicely asked as she walked inside the room, quickly walking over to the desk area that was in the corner and placing her stuff down.

"Uhhh, Caleb Dolan, August 17, 2008," a deep voice that she could recognize from anywhere spoke as she turned around. Her heart dropped at the sight of Grayson in front of her. She tried to reassemble herself, after all, she couldn't make any mistakes right now, Reyez was trusting her and she couldn't afford to mess the opportunity up.

"Caleb, August 17, 2008," she mumbled as she wrote it down on her piece of paper, "Caleb, do you mind telling me what happened, babe?" She asked with a smile on her face. Her smile turned into a small frown as she looked up at the boy who happened to be in pain.

"Me and uncle Gray were practicing for the soccer game that's next and I fell on the mud and hit my leg really hard," he explained as she walked towards him nodding her head.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, One being okay while 10 being the worst, how would you rate the pain?" She asked, walking over to the walk to grab a pair of gloves, putting them on, and walking back towards him.

"Uhh a seven," he replied and she nodded her head.

"Okay Caleb, just know this might hurt a little okay? It's just protocol to check if it's dislocated, broken, or sprained okay?" She asked and he nodded his head, a few tears falling down his face from fear. Grayson quickly leaned down to wipe off his face whispering a quiet 'you'll be okay' as Caleb grabbed his hand.

"Can you try and move your ankle for me? Just try and move it," she explained and he muttered at quiet yes before moving his foot in a slow circle, she nodded her head before placing both hands over his ankle checking for any bumps, which there were none to find, "Luckily for you Caleb, it's just sprained! There are no bumps meaning it's not dislocated, and you can move it meaning it's not fractured! Just to make sure, we're going to need an X Ray' just to make sure there are no hidden surprises yeah? Dr. Lindsey will do those with you, and I'll be right here when you come back," she smiled up at the boy before Dr. Lindey moved him to a wheelchair and took him to the X Ray room, leaving Y/N and Grayson alone in painful silence.

"So this is what you do? This is where you work?" Grayson was the first to speak after a couple of quiet seconds,

She cleared her throat and nodded her head, placing her hands inside her white jacket, "Yeah. It's a paid internship so it's basically a job, what about you? What are you doing here?" She asked to make direct eye contact with him.

"Moved here after me and E graduated, looking for some roles and an agent," he spoke, his voice not as deep yet shakier than when he first spoke.

"Any luck with that?"

"Yeah. We've landed a few small roles here and there," he answered and she just nodded her head.

"That's good! I'm glad everything's working out for you," She gave him a genuine smile before continuing to fill out Caleb's paperwork.

"Listen, I know it's been 2 years but-," Grayson began to speak before Y/N cut him off. "-Grayson just don't. I'm at work right now, and it's enough seeing you after 2 years, but I don't really need this right now. I'm sorry," She apologized before leaving the room to get some papers before walking back in, thankfully Caleb was already in the room when she walked in.

"I'm going to wrap your ankle up with this and then you're good to go, buddy. Make sure you don't apply pressure on it for two weeks. And carefully when you're playing any sport, I don't want you back here," she said while wrapping his ankle up carefully. She gave Grayson the discharge papers, their hands touching each other for a split second before she pulled away waving them off before walking to where her team was.

"That guy was looking at you intensely," Reyez pointed out, earning a glare from her.

"Don't even start," she rolled her eyes before taking a sip from her water bottle that was on her desk.

"Wait is that the?" Jacob, one of the nurses, asked and she nodded her head.

"Yeah, that's him," she sighed, shaking her head.

"Holly shit Y/N, I knew you said he was hot, but girl? That man is hotter than-,"

"Mackenzie, don't you dare," Y/N joked towards her other co-worker, "God why do you do this to me? I was almost over him and then you put him on my path again? The universe hates me,"

"I'd go for it again if I were you," Mackenzie encouraged earning a glare from her.

"Alright, leave her alone before she starts to crumble, Mackenzie go fill out reports, Y/N go take a breather," Reyez ordered them around and they all nodded their heads, going on their way to do what they were told.

. . .

Soft snores began to quietly run past her lips as she drifted off to sleep, all before a feeling of suddenly falling down an empty whole woke her up. She shook her head letting out a quiet 'fuck' before turning to look towards the clocks on her nightstand, 3:30 AM being brightly displayed on it. Y/N let out a loud sigh, knowing she wouldn't be going back to sleep anytime soon.

Her mind suddenly clouded with knotted thoughts and notions, too many of them just to focus on a single one. She pushed her body up, just enough for her to reach over and grab the small yellow backpack that she lazily threw on the floor, pulling her journal and pen out before throwing it back on the floor.

She clicked the pen and opened the journal, blank pages waiting to be filled up, her hand delicately moved along the paper as she scribbled letters and words on the empty pages, thoughts clearing out of her head, one by one.

I saw him today. He looked different. He's grown. After it all, it has been two years. His voice is deeper too. He wanted to talk, but I said no. Maybe if I did, I would fall for him again, or something. I'm doing just fine, so why did he have to move here. Anyway, Reyez finally allowed me to take care of patients by myself today. It was fun, I liked it, I guess. Luckily I'm free tomorrow because I can't sleep at all now. Maybe it's the repeating thoughts of him running through my mind, or just simply the lack of melatonin in my body right now. I'll probably go to the park tomorrow, stop at the cafe first then make my way there, but anyway, I'm going to try and sleep now.

It was a quick entry, nothing special, just her major thoughts being written down, just enough for her to feel better. She got up from the bed walking over to the kitchen grabbing a water bottle before leaning against the counter and sipping it. She crossed her bare legs over each other, looking out of the big window in her living room. Her favorite part about the apartment? It was the window that looked down on bright LA city. Y/N could sit there for hours and not notice the time pass by, she knows this because it happened before. She left the kitchen and walked towards the window, propping her body down on the small couch she had in front of the window. She laid her head on her hand, watching the few cars that sped down the street, the small yet bright red lights disappearing into the distance as her eyes followed them until they could.

Her eyes softly closed as she laid down on the couch, drifting off into another universe. The next morning she woke up at around 8 AM, doing her daily routine, except she stopped at the Cafe, picked her things up, and made her way to the park. It was an old park, there was an old playground that seemed like it hadn't been used in years. She sat down on an old bench drinking her coffee as she watched the scenery.

She didn't take her notebook out, her mind not having any thoughts, or at least no thoughts relevant enough for her to write down. She just took her time to take her surroundings in. She admired how the wind moved the trees, yet they were so strong they didn't crack. The way the birds lifted off whatever surface they were, and drifted off into the sky. She admired the rare butterflies that randomly appeared just to disappear once again. She simply admired the earth, something that she didn't do quite often; Always being too deep in her thoughts to actually study the things around her.

"They're beautiful aren't they?" Grayson's voice spoke out of nowhere, making Y/N do a slight jump in her seat as her heart raced.

She brought her hand up to her chest, a sigh falling past her lips as she glared at Grayson who was chuckling, "You fucking scared me,"

"Sorry," he sighed, sitting down next to her.

They both let out sighs. Both knowing that there was no escaping the conversation that was about to happen, a conversation that was long due.

"You could, hmm, you could go first," she spoke after a few moments of silence, throat dried making her clear it in the middle of some of her words.

"I'm sorry about yesterday. You were working, and Ummm, it wasn't the right place or time to talk about things. I'm also sorry because I never gave you an explanation as to why we should've broken up. After all, you didn't ask anyway," He softly spoke. He thought every word through, studied each meaning before letting them run past his lips.

"I didn't ask because it's what you wanted. Your decision was clearly made. I mean, I don't think breaking up with someone is a spontaneous thought is it? Your decision was made, and if you felt like I was holding you back, then I had to let you go, if I loved you, then I think I did the right thing." Her words were careful too. And quiet, so quiet feeling that if she spoke too loud the things around her would break.

"I didn't want to break up. I felt like it was the right thing to do, you know? We were always so busy, and we made time for each other, but it was exhausting. And when you were out with friends, I felt like I was annoying you or something," he sighed and she shook her head, the thought of her ever getting annoyed at Grayson's presence being absurd.

"Oh God absolutely not," she chuckled, "I thought I was annoying you. Like I wondered if you talked about me, or not. I wanted to know if I annoyed you because I felt like I did,"

It was true. In her journal, multiple pages were filled out with her question herself on whether Grayson talked about her or not. Even after the breakup, she wondered if he'll ever need her. Most pages were about him, all of her thoughts revolved around him, always.

"I did. All the time, to the point where I said your name subconsciously," he smiled, remembering the conversations he had with his friends about her, and how great she was.

"I did too, well not say but write," she sighed, leaning her back on the bench.

"You wrote about me?"

"Grayson you know I did, that's a dumb question," She shook her head, taking a sip of the coffee that was somehow still warm.

"Do you still write about me?" He asked and she stayed quiet, not knowing whether she should answer truthfully or not.

"Honestly speaking, I do. I write about everything that comes to mind, so sometimes? Yeah," she sighed, knowing that it would be easier if they just told the truth.

Maybe this was the closure that they both needed, yet never got. Maybe this was going to help her fully move on from him, and have thoughts that don't include her.

Or maybe not. Maybe this would help them reconnect. Y/N left it all up to the universe. She was a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and that you can't change your future since it's already written about. When she got home after a couple of hours she took a shower, lit on her favorite candles, and did the expected. She took out her notebook and wrote.

We spoke today. He told me the reason why we broke up. It wasn't an intentional meeting though, I was just admiring nature. I was looking at the butterflies I think. He randomly spoke. And I know it was long due and needed so I just told him to say it. It's better to just get it over with than to just keep pushing it back, I think. He told me why he wanted to break up, which right now, sounds like a valid reason. I just wonder why he didn't just say it back then. It would've saved me a lot of nights, don't you think? He now knows I write about him, and where I go to write about him. Maybe I shouldn't go there anymore. It sounds out of this world I know. But maybe, just maybe, I should just close that chapter in my life.

There are just too many memories of him at Beachwood. That's where he surprised me the first time he came to visit. And it's where I write about him the most. I could find another cafe near here, there's plenty.

I just wonder if we're ever going to see each other again. If I'll ever fall for him again, if that is even possible. Because I don't think you could fall for the same person twice, right?

That was the last page in her journal. All the pages filled with her delicate letters, her writing being eternal. Filled with on-going words until the end, where an unanswered question laid. The weight that was once on her shoulders began to fade, and for once in her life, the thought of her future no longer made her afraid.

This is the first time I’m proud of a something I wrote, so if this flops, I will deactivate! Just kidding, sort of. Anyways, yeah, I feel like my writing has improved, and as always, if you have any tips, and/or constructive critism, please, please, please drop them in my inbox, and don’t worry, I won’t say your hurting my feelings lmfao!!

Tag List: @guiltydols @evergreendolan @ydolanssss @rhyrhy462 @resilientdolan @simplyxdolxstyles @simplyxdolxstyles {If you wanna be added to my Tag List, just let me know :) lol}

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amiechuchu · 3 years ago

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Magic, Mayhem, and All Things In Between

Chapter 3: Background of the Study

[A/N: finally some y/n and loki development. soft loki moments. i am once again back with the self-indulgent fic and i hope you enjoy :’)]

other chapters can be found here

Weeks had passed since you had accepted Mr. Stark’s small favor. Weeks had passed since you began spending the majority of your time with the Asgardian brothers and dear Uncle Bruce. Though the days were filled with chatter, the late nights in the lab were quite the opposite. With only the low hum of machines to keep you company, you realized how lonely it can be. It was unlike the times you spent in the hospital, where you’d be surrounded by fellow doctors, nurses, and patients even at the dead of night. Despite how these late night duties meshed with early mornings, dulling your own sense of time, you didn’t mind it because of the company that you had. Research work, on the other hand, was a different story. Despite your years of experience, the burnout and loneliness that accompanied research work slowly made its way to the deepest parts of your brain.

“Hey,” a voice said as a hand waved in front of you, snapping you out of the trance you were in. It was Loki. “Are you okay, pet? You look rather dead.” The God held up a cup of freshly brewed coffee and passed it on to you.

“I’m fine,” came your quick reply as you received the cup from him, your hands nudging his slightly, “thank you for the coffee by the way.” You gave Loki a weak smile before beginning to sip from the warm cup of comfort that was given to you.

The lack of reaction was unusual. How many times has Loki seen you flustered with just the tiniest forms of physical touch? Probably every single time. Confused, he grabbed a chair and set it down beside you. “Are all you Midgardians always so dishonest about what you feel?” There was that usual bite in his manner of speaking. Though, no matter how hard he tried to hide it in his cold demeanor, he could feel the concern dripping from the words he uttered; the loneliness he saw in your eyes hit too close to home. Did he get too close? Maybe showing that he cared was a mistake.

Keeping your eyes on the warm mug, you hummed in reply, refusing to answer a clear yes. Your eyes glanced up at the God beside you, longing to understand why he’d even bother. Clearly, you were oblivious to any form of care or concern Loki has shown. It wasn’t as if you had your guard up, rather you were quite unfamiliar with the intimacies of talking about your own feelings. Although the question he asked was clearly rhetorical, you still wondered: Do Asgardians not repress their own feelings to prevent them from getting distracted from things that truly matter?

Green orbs stared at yours, noticing the ever darkening bags under your eyes. “I was just concerned,” Loki began, voice softening. The God looked away and focused on the variety of glassware set up on the table adjacent to them, “it has been a while since you’ve left the laboratory. You didn’t even sneak out to the medical wing for a little breather.”

You raised an eyebrow at him in disbelief. How could he have noticed all that? How could he have cared at all? After all, you were just a lowly Midgardian, as he put it, and he was a God, a deity, someone with power and importance. “How did you-”

“It pains me that you put me on the same level as them, little doctor,” the God interjected as he faced you once more, “out of all the weeks we’ve spent in this laboratory, you really believed I wouldn’t have noticed.” He noticed the closeness of your proximity; his form inches away from yours, yet your mind was elsewhere.

“In my defense, everyone else I’ve met in this tower described you as a narcissistic asshole and a war criminal,” you shrugged, “so, naturally, I didn't think you would care at all about my well-being.” You took a sip from your cup, and indulged in the buzz the caffeine began to give you. “But I don’t think you’re as bad as they make you out to be. They just didn’t think of the whole story. Just took out a portion of it. It was unfair - what they did to you. It felt as if you always had the short end of the stick.”

Silence.

Now, it was your turn to shock your Asgardian companion. Being on the other end of empathy was foreign to Loki as everyone treated him quite harshly. He grew up in the shadow of Thor, the more loveable sibling, and, as much as he wanted to show off his capabilities, that he was just as worthy as Thor, Loki was left in the darkness, to wallow in promises unkept, to wallow in dreams broken, to wallow in his own great tragedy.

Eyes feeling heavy, You turned your head towards Loki, waiting for a response; though you were a naturally perceptive person, the look on his face was filled with emotions you couldn’t make out. Was he mad? Did you say too much? That analysis was unwarranted, of course he’d be mad. Embarrassed, you looked down on your cup of coffee once more, “I apologize if I said anything out of line. There are just too many things in my mind right now. I don’t think I was able to filter my thoughts very well.”

“Pray tell, dear doctor. What are you thinking of?” Loki replied, deciding to change the course of their conversation. With brows slightly raised and his gaze set at your exhausted form, you felt the God studying you, attempting to break down the essence of what makes the little physician tick.

Deciding to be a smartass, you replied, “like I said, many things.” You set down your cup of coffee on the table and crossed your arms. “Why do you ask, Loki? These past few weeks you’ve been awfully helpful to the point that Uncle says it’s weird and unlikely for you to do that just for a human. I appreciate it though, but I just don’t see why you should go out of your way to listen to me.”

“Your words wound me, doctor,” Loki chuckled, emerald eyes piercing yours, “can I not be concerned? I see years worth of loneliness and unfulfilled expectations in your eyes to the point that you can’t even deny it. I’m sure you understand what isolation and over independence can do.” Your eyes softened, glistening under the incandescent lights. You were cracking slowly, and the God knew this. He knew what you were seeking: comfort, validation, a shoulder to cry on. It was clear as day.

“Well, I could see all the walls you’ve built. You know everything about everybody, but barely anyone knows anything about you,” you attempted to reply proudly; however, your words were breathy, already beginning to shake. So much for an attempted bark. Embarrassed, you looked away defensively, not taking another moment under his perceptive gaze. It felt as if all the skeletons you’ve kept inside your closet were being showcased all of a sudden, and you hated every second of it. Your stomach churned as your defenses slowly came undone; it wouldn’t take a while now for you to start oversharing, possibly even crying your eyes out. His hand tenderly reached out to the edge of your chin and tilted it towards him. It was warm, soothing. Comforting.

“I could say the same to you, darling. You act as if you don’t build walls around you, yet you keep everyone else at arms reach. I know what loneliness and distrust does to people, and I also know that you shouldn’t hold yourself accountable for all these expectations.” There was a slight pang in Loki’s chest as he said all these truths. He too bore wounds invisible to the eye. He too carried scars from the past. These emotions were far too familiar to the raven-haired God much like old friends, and he was afraid that, by reading these off your face, he’d become attached somehow, mended together by a mutual understanding of each other’s pain. What would become of his plan then? His glorious purpose?

Looking up to him, you realized how small you were, how fragile, how easy it was for him to see through your façade. It was oddly nice to have someone who had a grasp on your inner demons, albeit without consent. You felt a connection in the making.

Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to trust him.

Days have passed since the God of Mischief and the doctor have shared a portion of the thoughts they hid away in the darkest parts of their head. It was needless to say that the two now had an unspoken connection, a commiseration of loneliness, self-doubt, and crushing expectations. Often, they’d find their gazes focused on one another, with smiles shared and laughter exchanged. Other times, a helping hand would linger longer than usual atop the other’s. A gentle squeeze or the light encircling of one’s thumb, a sign of care and concern; these gestures only happened when the two were alone, knowing that dear Uncle Bruce would be highly against it. However, it wouldn’t be long before the others noticed.

You were grateful that today was a relatively slow day in the laboratory. Majority of the specimens that were scheduled for today’s tests were finished earlier than usual along with the case presentations and progress reports Mr. Stark had asked you to make. Though it seemed like such a small feat, you took it positively; today, you could finally take a breather. You hummed happily as you began arranging the mountain of paperwork around the main table.

Upon reaching for the next pile of papers, a familiar hand laid atop of yours. You smiled and looked at your raven-haired companion, admiring the way his tousled locks framed his oh-so ethereal face.

“Do you need help, my dear doctor?” Loki asked as his thumb drew circles on your hand. Though his silvery voice tugged at your heartstrings as they always did, your cheeks were slightly tinged a light shade of red at mention of the pet name. The God never called you his doctor before.

“I can manage,” you replied as you turned your hand, interlocking your fingers with his. You kept your gaze on your hands intertwined with his, the way they fit together so perfectly. “It’s surprisingly not as busy today.”

Loki leaned down, his face close behind your neck. “A bit bold today aren’t we, pet?” he jested, breath tickling the side of your ear.

Thor observed the scene from afar, shocked. He never thought that his brother would’ve established a bond with the doctor, not in the way that Loki didn’t deserve any type of social interaction, but in the way that his brother wasn’t the easiest person to get along with. With arms crossed, the God of Thunder continued to watch as the two continued on with their intimacies, wondering when and how this managed to start. He watched the way your eyes lingered on his brother attentively; the way you were able to tug a smile on Loki’s face; the way his face lit up when you were around; the way your gentle touch was able to open a different side of Loki.

Though he was wary of his brother and his antics, Thor disregarded his suspicions: the two of you were much too happy occupied in your bubble of… friendship? No, it was more than that. So much more. Something was blossoming, and the God of Thunder was sure of it. He was unsure of the status of you and Loki’s relationship, but nevertheless he was still happy. However, he wasn’t so sure if your uncle would be so accepting of it, knowing the bad blood between what had happened in New York.

The doors of the laboratory swept open, startling the two friends. Thor coughed loudly to alert his brother and the doctor, but it was already too late for them to fall back to a more believably platonic position. Out came Mr. Stark and Uncle Bruce from the elevators, both shocked at the closeness of you and Loki. Tony looked more curious than shocked at the development. Your uncle, on the other hand, radiated a crushing aura, and, although Uncle Bruce’s face seemed calm and collected at the moment, you knew very well that there was anger hidden underneath it. He always warned you about Loki and the danger he could bring if you got involved, so it was no surprise to you if his anger came from both concern and disappointment.

Awkward air filled the room as the two made their way towards the laboratory’s main table. Loki stepped back away from you, whispering something along the lines of you being okay. You nodded in affirmation then looked down, averting any type of eye contact, and started to fiddle with the sheets of paper you had in hand.

Sighing, you knew it was taboo to speak of the laboratory’s peace out loud since it always brought bad luck. Now, you’re going to have to deal with the consequences.

taglist: @gaycatlord-stuff @aces-tattooartist

#mmaatib #magic mayhem and all things in between #loki #loki laufeyson #loki x reader #loki x y/n #loki x you #loki/you #loki/reader #amie drabbles

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liusaidh-writing · 4 years ago

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Call it True - Chapter 3

[Prefer AO3?]

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2]

Here is Chapter 3! I am sorry it’s so late. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy. Chapter Four is on its way soon, too!

*****************************

Claire and Jamie exchanged texts and phone calls in the following days and nights. Unable to connect in person, they did what they could to remain close. Claire's night shifts ended after a week, and she was relieved to be back in the world of daylight once again. She also hoped this meant she and Jamie could get together again. And soon.

I'm free! Well, until my time rolls around again, anyway. Next two days off, and not a single thing planned!

She hit send with a grin and imagined what she and Jamie might do on her time off. Go to dinner? Watch a movie, preferably curled up on a couch. What movies did he like? She started compiling a list of possible options while she rode along in Lesley's car after her final night shift had ended in the early morning hours. They’d picked up a grumbly Harry at the sitters before heading to Claire’s flat.

Lesley, in the driver's seat, reached back to grab Harry's snack cup before it was flung to the floor by a frustrated toddler. The car swerved slightly as she turned back in her seat, causing Claire to gasp before Lesley set it right again.

Lesley thrust the snack cup at Claire, snapping, "Did you not hear me? I was asking you to grab it from him! Where's your mind been these last few days, anyway?"

Claire grasped the cup in her hands, dropping the phone in her lap. "Sorry! I just...didn't hear you! I’d rather the snack cup take the hit next time instead of us!"

"You're sitting right next to me, and unless you've gone deaf in the last ten minutes, you're just not paying attention," Lesley said in a sing-songy voice, ignoring Claire’s comment regarding her driving, but making an obvious effort to keep her tone light. She sighed, flipping the wipers on to clear the windshield of mist. It was annoyingly rainy, only a mere drizzle, but oddly cold for a spring morning. "Feels like winter outside, does it not," she remarked, attempting to change the subject.

"Yep...pretty cold."

Claire's mind wandered back to Jamie in the sweater he'd worn on their date. It had looked so cozy, and Claire wondered how it would feel on her. She blinked rapidly, forcing herself back to the present.

"So, you had been telling me earlier about...custody?"

Lesley sighed, grudgingly answering Claire's question.

"Yes...I told you everything, but you were off in lala land half the time. Not surprised you don't remember. If you're here with me now, I'll tell you again."

"Yes, please, I'm really listening." Claire shoved her phone between her leg and the seat, hoping that having it out of sight would help her stay focused on what her friend was saying.

"Well, Frank has decided he wants full custody of Harry. Make me some kind of weekend Mum." Lesley gritted her teeth thinking about the very idea of it. "Like he's capable of taking him on full time," she said, gesturing at Harry in the back, who'd fallen asleep. “He wouldn’t last an hour before he was calling me, begging for help.”

"He doesn't have grounds, surely! He can't just...make stuff up!" Claire was indignant, knowing how great of a mother Lesley was, and how perfectly lousy Frank was at everything from keeping Harry fed when he had him to keeping promises to Lesley about drop off times.

Lesley shook her head and rested her left elbow on the car door as they sat at a stoplight. "It's absolutely insane. He thinks because he makes more money that he should have Harry. That my schedule at the hospital isn't 'suitable for a toddler.’ He's just making sure I waste my money on legal fees fighting him instead of spending it on taking care of Harry so I'll look bad," she finished, glancing at Claire with an incredulous expression.

"Well, you know I'll do anything to help, Lesley!"

They had reached Claire's building, and as Claire got out she reached back and lightly ruffled Harry's hair, giving Lesley a smile and thanked her for the ride. She grabbed her things and headed to her door, feeling her phone signal that she had a text message as she walked. She quickly unlocked her door, slung them to the floor and hungrily unlocked her phone to see a message from Jamie waiting to be read.

Good to hear, Sassenach. I suppose you’ll need to go home and sleep. How about I come by later this evening?

Claire quickly sent a reply and beamed at...well, no-one. She locked her door and dreamily waltzed to the shower, eager to strip off her scrubs and wash the night away.

“Jamie and I are hanging out tonight!” she squealed, raising her arms in victory over her head. She gave a little twirl as she moved past her bedroom. Taking off her top, she flung it on her bed. Claire felt like a teenager - she was sure her cheeks were pink and her mind raced with all the possibilities of the evening. She nearly replied to Jamie that she didn’t need to sleep, but...that wasn’t true. She was dead on her feet and her shift last night had been especially brutal with several stressful patients. She sighed, realizing she deeply regretted not having made the effort to really meet Jamie earlier. Why had she wasted so much time? Now that they were friendly, she couldn’t seem to get him out of her mind. Lesley hadn’t been wrong when she’d said Claire had been in la-la land. She reminded herself to thank Lesley for saving her ass more than once at work in the past week. If it wasn’t Jamie’s calls or texts, it was her own imagination getting her in trouble. Over the phone, Jamie had told her all about his family, his nieces and nephews and sister. He had a best friend named Ian, who happened to be his brother-in-law. And a father he clearly cared a lot about. Claire had never known that sort of reality, growing up as she had. She revelled in Jamie’s stories of his boyhood, clinging to bits of him that he unknowingly exposed.

For instance, Claire was sure that Jamie was secretly in love with his father’s farm, though he had claimed he didn’t care to run things when the time came, that he’d gotten his flat in the city to escape that reality. He talked of it with such pride, and Claire wondered why he didn’t live there full time, as much as he was there. It held fond memories of his mother, and it was his connection to his extended family, and she knew family meant a lot to him.

She couldn’t exactly relate - though she had loved her uncle a great deal - but it was almost surreal hearing about hectic holidays or birthday celebrations Jamie got to experience growing up. Claire was rather envious at times. Her holidays usually involved Uncle Lamb flat-out forgetting them, and though he always remembered her birthday, he wasn’t the greatest at remembering to mark the date in any meaningful way other than a sweet ‘Happy Birthday, darling,’ and a pat on the cheek. She quickly made a mental note to ask Jamie about his birthday sometime.

Pulling back the shower curtain, she sighed as the steamy hot water washed away the night at the hospital; it succeeded in making her drowsy enough to fall quickly asleep.

---

Claire woke to a rather loud knock at her door. She rolled out of bed, hair all akimbo, eyes squinting as she opened her room darkening curtains. Padding towards the door, she quickly wrapped herself in the throw from the couch before turning the knob. There stood Jamie, a slight smile on his face that immediately fell when he caught sight of her.

"Oh God--"

"I'm sorry--"

They both spoke at the same time, Claire wrapping the blanket more securely around her shoulders. She had shorts and a small tee-shirt on, but no bra. She began to speak again, wondering if she looked as horrible as she feared. Jamie grimaced and took a breath.

"I am so sorry, I didn't wake you did I?"

"Oh, no. It's fine, really! I must look frightening..." Claire carefully took one arm out of her wrap and tried to smooth her hair in an attempt to calm her curls.

"NO! You look...stunning!" His eyes were wide, as though he’d seen a ghost.

"Oh, God no. Would you like to...?"

She gestured him inside, and quickly caught that he was holding a few things in his hands. A wad of blankets and a small thermal lunch bag were clutched in his arms as he shuffled inside.

"Let me just...go change. Have a seat, will you?" She moved towards her bedroom as she watched Jamie sit on her sofa, placing his things on the cushion beside him.

She closed her bedroom door, tossed the throw on her bed and leaned heavily against the door, her head making a distinct thumping sound as it hit. "Ow..." she muttered. "Hope he didn't hear that..."

She was jittery and her mouth was dry. He had that effect on her - one she couldn't put into words. Her stomach was consumed by a swarm of butterflies as she got dressed, brushing her teeth and washing her face. She raised her arms over her head checking her armpits for odor, and swiped on some deodorant, finishing with a quick spray of her favorite perfume with a flourish. She didn’t dare go back out there smelling like a hospital. She wasn’t entirely trusting of the shower she’d taken.

Taking a few deep, but not-so-calming breaths, she went back out to her living room, where Jamie waited patiently, thumbing through a magazine on her coffee table.

“I’m all for color in a room, but this shade of green makes me think of vomit.” Jamie was pointing at a photo of a painted room in some home decor article, curling his lip up in disgust at said shade of green.

He smiled at Claire, dropping the magazine and taking her in slowly, his eyes large and bright.

Claire looked down at her outfit - Jeans and a warm, deep red top. She’d been told it ‘brought out her eyes’, whatever the hell that meant, so she figured it was a good choice. She smoothed her shirt down and gestured at the magazine.

“Well, we don’t have to worry about that - I asked if I could paint when I moved in and was told no. Can’t wait to be able to live somewhere without blank white walls.” She waved haphazardly around the room, devoid of artwork, save for several of her own photos from various trips, and a few of Uncle Lamb, of course.

“It’s good to see you again, Claire.” Jamie stood up, moving towards her with his hand out. She wasn’t sure what he was going for, so she moved with him, meeting him in the middle. He clasped her hand in his, and they both paused for a moment, Claire watching his eyes dance as he gazed at her. He gave a small smile with one corner of his mouth, and quickly kissed her cheek.

“It’s good to see you again, too,” Claire sighed, her breath coming out in spurts. She felt him relinquish her hand, and she glanced at it, half expecting it to be bright red the way it radiated his lingering warmth. He stepped back just a bit, and gestured to the items he’d brought with him.

“It’s a little wet outside, but there’s a free concert at the park. Would you like to come? If you don’t want to sit on the ground, I have chairs.” He raked a hand through his hair and tapped the fingers of his right hand against his thigh. He hadn’t taken his eyes off her.

Jamie’s voice was shaky with nerves, and Claire quickly tried to put him at ease.

“I don’t mind the ground!” She figured Jamie could offer her spikes to sit on and she’d accept them if that meant he’d be there, too. “Let’s go, it’ll be fun!”

Jamie nodded, picking up the blanket and lunch bag. “Brought some goodies for us to snack on, too.”

“Oh, good. I’m starving! Haven’t eaten all day!”

Claire grabbed her purse as they walked to the door together, slinging it over her shoulder and grabbing her keys from the counter. She didn’t know what kind of music would be playing at this concert, but she didn’t care in the slightest. She was also rather eager to find out what was in that lunch bag. Her stomach gurgled, and she made a face as Jamie hid a smile.

He took her hand again, pulling her toward the door and out into the damp night. It was about 7 in the evening, and though the days were getting longer, the rain clouds obscured any remaining sunlight.

-----

Having picked the driest bit of ground he could, Jamie spread out one warm wool blanket, gesturing for Claire to take a seat while he unfolded the other one. It was as large as the one they sat on, and doubly thick. Claire shivered slightly as she watched him swirl the blanket around her shoulders. He sat down next to her - quite closely, so she could feel the heat coming off him, and he wrapped the other half of the blanket around his own shoulders, meeting the two ends in the middle between them. It was cozy, and the band had just started. She looked around, wishing they weren’t surrounded by other people at the moment. Claire looked at Jamie - who had been casually checking out the band. He glanced at her, then reached for the lunch bag.

“What do you have for us?” Claire’s stomach growled again, and Jamie chuckled as he unzipped the bag while Claire held the blanket in place.

“Erm...not much. Some crackers, cheese, grapes. A small bag of chips, if you’re in the mood for junk food?” He held the chips out to her and she hungrily ripped it open, popping one in her mouth with a satisfied grin.

“Mmmm...so good. I’ve not had anything to eat since about 6 this morning. I forgot to eat when I got home from work.” Because you texted me, she added in her head, and I wanted nothing more than to go to sleep quickly so I could see you.

Jamie went for a few grapes, munching them as he watched her devour the chips. She offered him one, holding it up to his mouth.

“Have one!” she exclaimed, wiggling it in front of him.

He went for it, and she quickly pulled it away. She laughed as he pursed his lips in mock irritation. “Give me that,” he said, pulling her hand towards his mouth again, taking the chip between his teeth. His lips slightly brushed Claire’s finger tips, and a shiver traveled through her body as they laughed together.

Their bodies were touching entirely now, from shoulder to toes, and Claire didn’t want to be anywhere else. She leaned against him, and he let her put her weight against his chest as he held the blanket with his left hand. His right arm wrapped around her waist. Claire felt flush, slightly feverish, silently basking in his glow. The rain was cold, the ground was colder, but she wouldn’t have known it with Jamie securely keeping them both comfortably warm.

The band played on, the bass pulsing through her. She didn’t know the songs, but nodded her head with the beat periodically. For all the sound, though, her mind was somewhere else entirely. She wanted nothing more than to turn around, place her lips on his, and fall into him. She glanced at the people around her again, most of them chit-chatting, drinking, or eating. She felt him squirm slightly, and glanced back at him as best she could in her position. She felt his arm leave her side, make its way up her arm to her shoulder, and then into her hair. He played with her curls as he stretched one long leg out in front of them, where his boot got wet with rain. Claire’s hands were in her lap - she was entirely unsure what she should do with them, so she clutched her middle as the swarm of butterflies (more like angry hornets, if she was honest with herself) engulfed her middle. Her eyes fluttered closed as Jamie continued twirling her curls around his finger.

“Hey, Sassenach, are you thirsty? I could go get us some drinks at the food cart?” Jamie gestured with his head, back behind them where beer and soda was sold at an exorbitant price.

Claire turned slightly and looked at him, his brows raised in question.

She took a breath, swallowing all her fear and uncertainty. The hornets in her stomach faded to a dull ache as she turned some more, raising her hands to his face. She’d caught him off guard, and as her lips enveloped his own, he was still for a split second before deepening the kiss with his hand still in her hair, clutching her curls now, tugging slightly. Claire breathed in deeply, the noises of the band and people around them fading into oblivion, a fuzzy mirage at the corner of her vision as she closed her eyes, unwilling to break their connection. His tongue danced with hers briefly before he pulled away. Claire, with her eyes still closed, felt him rubbing her cheek with his thumb.

“Oi, if we wanted to see that, we’d have gone to see a movie!”

Claire’s eyes snapped open, her head whirling around to her right searching for the person that matched the voice. A young teenage boy smirked in their direction, sniggering a bit as she eyed him. He held a full pint of beer in one hand, and cocked his head, daring her to say something in return.

“He’ll break up with ya tomorrow,” the boy said, laughing with his mates, one of them slapping him on the shoulder in congratulations for his stupendous observation. Claire’s brow knit in confusion.

“Why don’t you-” she was cut off by Jamie, who stood up quickly, pulling the blanket that was around them up into a ball. He put it down, and stretched his arms over his head, making himself appear even larger. The kid with the beer blanched, spilling a bit in his lap as he involuntarily jerked away at Jamie’s stone cold glare.

“Come on, Sassenach. Let’s go…” He gathered up the lunch bag, and offered her his hand. She took it, letting him pull her up. She was shivering now, his warmth having left her. She moved so he could pick up the other blanket, and they slowly picked their way through the crowd.

Claire was surprised to feel her chin trembling a bit. Was she going to...cry? God, not now, she thought. How silly. It had just been a kid trying to stir up trouble for a laugh. It wasn’t funny, though, Claire thought angrily. It made her feel ashamed, but for what? She’d simply kissed Jamie. She held her breath for a moment, as she wondered if Jamie had minded that she’d done that - in the middle of the park, surrounded by people. She let her breath out again as she felt him grab her elbow and tug her closer. Perhaps he hadn’t minded afterall. He wasn’t making excuses to leave, anyway, she thought with some relief.

She felt Jamie put her hand through the crook of his elbow as he guided her back towards their building. She still shivered, and Jamie pulled her in, their shoes meeting the pavement in unison.

“Don’t worry about him, Sassenach.”

Claire looked up when he spoke, gave a small smile, and leaned her head against his shoulder.

“It’s ok…” she mumbled, wondering what the rest of the night would hold. She’d be up all night now, and didn’t particularly want her time with Jamie to come to an end.

“How about we get that full meal in you? You must still be hungry,” Jamie offered. “Let me drop these things by my flat and we’ll go, yeah?”

Claire nodded. “Sounds good, Jamie.”

#Outlander #Outlander Fanfic #Fanfiction #Call it True #i have come to realize that this is horrible #and i am sorry #but i will keep trying #i am so rusty at this writing thing...#please forgive me #i'm not as good as most of you #but i try...#ugh

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catflorist · 4 years ago

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The Time Being (ao3 / ffn) catflorist Summary: Time-slipping is a side effect of wielding the Rinnegan. When Sasuke slips through time, he always goes to Sakura, whether he wants to or not. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8

pt 5: sakura

After Sasuke left, Sakura woke up alone on a bench just as the sky began to lighten.

She rubbed the goosebumps on her bare arms. The aching pressure of a sob churned in her chest, but she could not cry.

Someone sat next to her. She recognized the line of his shoulders before she recognized his face.

Sasuke's jaw was sharper, his hair tied back and long enough to graze his shoulder blades. Mismatched eyes—red and purple—met hers before fading into their familiar dark.

He frowned. "You're cold." His voice was quieter, deeper than the voice of her Sasuke. He shrugged the cloak off his shoulders and offered it to her.

Sakura accepted, too stunned to speak. There was no need to voice the obvious. He was not the Sasuke she knew.

"I always wondered how you knew I was leaving," he said.

Sakura burrowed inside the cloak, still warm from his body. The fabric was soft, sun-worn, and smelled like salt. "Because I know you," she answered.

Sasuke smiled, and Sakura's head cleared. He had left, but he was here again. That had to mean something.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice trembled, but the knot in her throat was loosening.

The first rays of sun peeked over the horizon, lighting the treetops in gold. "I need to tell you something."

As dawn rose, Sasuke told her about his time-slipping, about the Rinnegan, that she should expect more appearances in the years to come. Sakura listened in a rapture. When he revealed the truth behind the massacre of the Uchiha clan, her tears finally fell. In the morning light, the village appeared ghostly, like bones bleaching in the sun.

"Will you ever come back?" Sakura asked, when everything was said.

"Yes," Sasuke said.

She dried her eyes on the collar of his cloak. "Do you promise?"

"I promise," he said. "We'll meet again soon."

"How long?"

"Five years or so, for you." His brow furrowed. "I'm sorry. You'll need to be patient with me."

"I'll be here when you're ready," she said.

Smiling again, Sasuke tapped the center of her brow with two gentle fingers. "You're with me right now."

A rush of questions flooded Sakura's mind, but they were out of time. Sasuke frowned, rubbing his temples, and Sakura took this to mean he was about to leave. She passed the cloak into his lap.

Sasuke slipped away like ducking underwater, leaving behind a quiet ripple of his presence.

When Naruto and Kakashi found her, the village had already woken up. Traffic clattered from the nearby main streets, and curtains fluttered from open windows. Someone nearby was grilling fish for breakfast.

"He's gone," Sakura said.

For a beat, Naruto and Kakashi said nothing. They searched Sakura's expression, giving her the opportunity to grieve, if she wanted to. But Sakura's breathing remained calm.

Kakashi lifted the hitai-ate obscuring his left eye. His gaze shone with regret. "This is my fault." At this, Sakura's lip started trembling.

Naruto's fists clenched and unclenched at his sides. "I'm going after him," he snarled.

"There's no need, Naruto." Sakura gripped the stone of the bench. "He'll come back one day."

Sakura trained under Tsunade and grew strong. She learned how to tear open the earth and to mend bones. How to store her chakra drop by drop, so one day it would become a vast ocean under her control.

Two years passed before she saw Sasuke again. It occurred in her own time. He perched on the rim of the cliff outside Orochimaru's hideout, wind lifting his robes. A purple obi ensnared his waist. With the sun at his back, he looked more shadow than boy. His eyes held nothing when he looked at her—neither interest nor contempt.

Then he said, "Sakura." He exhaled her name like a breath, like he didn't even realize he was saying it.

It still hurt when they failed to convince him to return, even if it was what Sakura expected.

The trip back to Konoha was solemn. Naruto was shaken and quiet, and even Sai wisely held his tongue. They traveled through the night until Captain Yamato constructed a temporary wooden shelter with four separate rooms.

When she was alone, Sakura held her head in her hands. She tried to fit the Sasuke she just saw into her knowledge of him. He was longer her teammate, and he was far from the man who had chosen to tie his hair back. He was somewhere in between, somewhere lost, with a long way to go.

"Sakura?"

Sasuke, exactly as she remembered from their genin days, inspected her wet face. All his questions stopped. He grasped her hand and looked stubbornly away, daring her to state what they both knew. It was not his way to freely offer a comforting touch.

Sakura closed her eyes. Sasuke had promised to return, but she never would have doubted it on her own.

"The daimyo wants to drain a lake to build another summer palace, and the council says they have the funds to spare," Tsunade spat, shoving a mountain of paperwork in Sakura's direction. "But there's nothing in the budget for the civilian guilds?"

Sighing in sympathy, Sakura pulled her favorite chair to Tsunade's desk. She flipped through the paperwork, signing a perfect copy of the Hokage's signature on each page. Tsunade filled two glasses with amber liquid, set one beside her student, and settled behind her own tower of paper. This was their evening ritual.

Signing her name with angry flourishes, Tsunade muttered, "Three years as Hokage and I can't get anything done."

Each day, Sakura watched Tsunade fight the council tooth and nail to implement her vision for the village. Each day, the council blocked her every move.

Sakura's pen stilled. Tsunade did not know the truth of the Uchiha massacre. Was it right to tell her?

"Tsunade-shishou…" she began, then the words froze on her tongue.

Her teacher raised an eyebrow. "Spit it out," she urged.

"Have you ever thought that the council might be doing more harm than good?"

This was a radical view. Many citizens of Konoha supported the council in their decision-making. The village was prosperous and powerful. There was no reason to ask deeper questions.

Tsunade was silent for a breath too long, revealing her answer. Teacher and student gazed at each other with a new understanding.

Sakura's hands shook. "There is something you should know."

The council met in an imposing structure set behind the largest gate in the village. Since few windows penetrated its thick walls, the building's interior remained cold and dim no matter the season. When darkness fell, Tsunade and Sakura snuck inside and entered the archive.

After undoing a genjutsu, breaking the ninjutsu seal on a wooden chest, and snapping a plain lock in half, they uncovered the file detailing plans behind the Uchiha massacre.

The scroll was thin. It did not take much space on a page at all to massacre a clan.

Sakura read it first. It was one thing to hear the truth from Sasuke. It was another to see it confirmed in writing, signed by the leaders of the village, and stamped in approval. When she saw the Third Hokage's signature, her heart panged. Sarutobi-sama had always been kind to her. Yet he had known and approved of this plan. Was it a betrayal, or a requirement of his position? Which was worse?

"This village is rotten to the core," Tsunade muttered after closing the scroll. "Is this why your teammate left?"

"No," Sakura said. "He doesn't know the truth yet."

"How did you think to look for this?"

"I was close with Sasuke," she offered, not meeting her teacher's eyes. "I had a suspicion."

Tsunade did not push further. She pressed her lips together, rubbed the space between her eyebrows. For once, the ageless face of Sakura's teacher looked tired.

"We carve our faces into the cliff as if we have something to celebrate," she said. "As if we owe our greatness to the world. But it's all a lie."

Huddled next to Tsunade, surrounded by the archive's chilly secrets, Sakura swore to make the village a better place by the time Sasuke returned.

"No surprise, Sakura. They denied your plans." Tsunade stamped a document hard enough to shake her entire desk. "Danzo told me personally."

Sakura clenched her fists, but she was not surprised. Last week Tsunade refused to shut down an investigation into the Hyuuga clan's use of branding. Now, the council had coincidentally tabled Sakura's sensible proposal to construct a pediatric wing of the hospital.

This was not Sakura's first roadblock. Last month, the council canceled their first meeting with Sakura's newly-established civilian board, citing scheduling conflicts, and dodged all attempts to reschedule. Not long before, they implied that unless Tsunade agreed to spare three extra jonin for the daimyo's entourage, they might not find funds to spare for Sakura's medic training program. Each time, Danzo delivered the news with a modest smile, as if he were pouring her a cup of tea and expecting gratitude in response.

The more Sakura's plans fizzled out, the more she feared Konoha could never change.

Sometimes Sakura imagined herself leaving the village. She thought about it the same way she thought about embracing the next Sasuke she saw. It was not a real possibility, but the idea floated in her head, and sometimes hurt to think about.

She could live alone somewhere. Maybe by the ocean. Her brain conjured all the details: fresh, salty air. Seabirds screeching and plummeting into the water. The temperamental sand shifting under her feet. There would be nothing to fix. Nothing would require changing. Maybe she would find peace.

Sakura worked hard to improve the village, but she did not buy the plant Ino suggested would flourish in the morning light of her bedroom. She stored every scrap of chakra away for her future seal. She did not spend money except when her friends dragged her to dinner. She thought about the Sasuke who smelled like salt. She dreamt about the ocean.

When Sasuke appeared next, it was at the worst possible time, and that's what she told him. She had a village to defend and to heal.

Sasuke was closer, somehow. He wore the obi, but his eyes were brighter. He did not hesitate to approach her and to call out her name. Sakura wished he had stayed long enough for her to heal the wound on his head.

The battle worsened. A hoard of Katsuyu's summons under Sakura's command saved the hospital and the old Uchiha compound from destruction, but Pain's attack leveled much of Konoha to the ground.

Tsunade sank into a coma. Shizune and Sakura tended to the wrecked village.

Captain Yamato was reconstructing Konoha by himself when Sakura stepped in. In his patient voice, he taught her the basics of woodstyle. At first she could only summon twigs and vines. Her wood produced too much foliage, inhibiting its use as a building material. She persevered. By the end of the month, she was by his side, reimagining and rebuilding Konoha, coaxing the surrounding forest to regrow.

Sakura and Yamato faced the empty land where the council building once stood.

"I have an idea," Sakura said, "though it isn't traditional."

"By all means," Yamato said.

Sakura pressed her hands together. Wood coiled into the air and formed a new type of building. It was small and modest with an unadorned facade. A large window opened upon the council gathering space. Where the gate once existed, she created a square for the citizens of Konoha to gather. The council's discussions could no longer occur in private, outside the public eye.

It was no trivial responsibility to possess the skills to rebuild a village. If she could carve out a window when before there was none, create a new space for people to breathe, she would.

"Sakura, you have too many jobs," Ino complained.

"I am a simple student," Sakura denied, though Ino was right. In Tsunade's absence, Sakura's role in the village took on more of a political nature than ever.

After the council appointed Danzo as the temporary Hokage, she and Shizune fought to maintain Tsunade's policies and legislation under his strict rule. During council meetings, she served as Tsunade's representative. In between these responsibilities, Sakura squeezed in training and shifts at the hospital.

This meant Sakura did not have time in her schedule to eat dinner with both Ino and Naruto in one week, so she requested they meet together. Her two friends disrupted the peaceful evening of every Konoha resident with their public debate over where to eat before Ino finally threw up her hands.

Naruto slurped his Ichiraku's ramen. "You're a student, a shinobi, an architect..."

"...a medic, a politician," Ino picked up. She considered. "A large-forehead-bearer."

"Pig," Sakura responded fondly. She eyed Naruto. "Dobe," she said, using Sasuke's word without thinking, and the cheerful mood dampened.

Ino set her teacup on the table with a soft clink. "Have you heard anything?"

Naruto sighed. "The teme is up to some shit."

Sakura chewed her lip. The last they'd heard, Sasuke had formed a team and joined the Akatsuki. Five years or so, Sasuke had promised. Over four years had passed since that day.

Just as a lump formed in Sakura's throat, Ino squeezed her shoulder. "Let's walk to the square, later," she suggested. "It's great, but I think it could use a few more places to sit."

They walked to the square. Sakura twisted wood into benches and placed them according to Ino's vision.

"Beautiful work. But what about trees? Some shade would be nice," Ino said. "Don't you think, Naruto?"

"Eh? But it's night––ow," Naruto gasped, as Ino elbowed him in the ribs. "I mean, absolutely. Could use some greenery, and all that."

Sakura's hands flew through the signs. Trees sprouted in each corner of the square, growing taller than the nearby council building, than any building in the village.

The transformation was immediate. Soft murmurs of rustling leaves replaced silence. A bird landed upon a branch. From where they were standing, the newly born foliage obscured the faces carved into the Hokage Mountain. In the silver wash of the moon, it appeared as if they grew over the mountain itself, a tangle of wood and leaf and stone.

Without speaking, the three of them sat together on the nearest bench, inaugurating the new space.

"This was a good idea, Ino," Sakura said.

Ino and Naruto raised eyebrows at each other.

"Do you feel better, Forehead?"

Gazing at the treetops, Sakura found herself smiling. She felt better.

Sakura was listening to a council meeting with detached resentment when news broke of Danzo's death.

Tsumiki Kido, Danzo's closest confidant on the council, called for a moment of silence. As councilmembers bowed their heads, Sakura's heart raced. She and Shizune shared a careful glance.

When the moment was done, Tsumiki shook his head. "It is clear Uchiha Sasuke has outgrown his usefulness."

"He is a criminal and an enemy," another voice chimed in.

Sakura already knew there was a future waiting for Sasuke. He would live to meet her on that bench. Still, her blood ran cold.

"The boy has shown his true colors," Tsumiki replied. "Who will his next target be? How else will he terrorize our beloved village?"

As evenly as she could manage, Sakura said, "Konoha will never be the same after Danzo-sama's loss." She lowered her head, and faces around the table followed suit. "He displayed the Will of Fire until the end. It is evident he made a great sacrifice for the village, a sacrifice we must not undermine."

Tsumiki frowned and opened his mouth.

"Don't you see?" Sakura interjected, meeting the eyes of each councilmember. "Danzo-sama could easily defeat any enemy. In his wisdom, he understood that Uchiha Sasuke's continued wellbeing is in the best interest of the village. The Uchiha clan's doujutsu, the Sharingan, is a valuable tool. Only Sasuke possesses this skill, now that his brother Itachi is dead."

When several heads nodded, Sakura frowned and looked to the ceiling. She twisted a strand of hair around her finger, as if in thought. "I'm happy to volunteer to look through our archives on the Uchiha clan. I'm certain I'll find useful information that illustrates how having an Uchiha in service of the village is beneficial. Perhaps I'll uncover other skills, other histories, that are useful to know. We keep good records, after all."

The younger members of the council did not blink, but Sakura watched key faces twitch. Their eyes bored into her, wondering if the words archive, Itachi, records, all said in the same context, were a coincidence.

As silence fell, the public square outside remained lively. Two elderly civilians took a seat upon one of the newly crafted benches. A shuriken thunked against the large window overlooking the meeting space. Children's laughter sounded, then a group of young Academy students raced to retrieve their object.

Tsumiki's lips pressed together in a thin line. "That won't be necessary."

All talk of retaliation against Sasuke ceased. Discussion turned to Danzo's funeral preparations, then to candidates for the next acting Hokage. Sakura suggested Kakashi. The council grumbled, but it was a good suggestion.

"You spoke well, but that was a risk," Shizune said later. "They will be upset."

Sakura was scrubbing her hands after a surgery when she heard that Tsunade was awake.

She burst into the room. Shizune lifted her tear-streaked face and smiled. Tsunade sat upright in her bed, young and fresh as ever, as if awaking from a catnap rather than a deathly coma. Her teacher was not physically affectionate, but she returned Sakura's tight embrace with no reservations, and brushed the uncombed hair away from her face.

"You've both been busy," Tsunade said, after Sakura and Shizune explained everything she had missed. She eyed Sakura, inspecting the dark circles under her student's eyes. "Don't give too much away. You can't heal or fight or fix this damn village if you don't keep anything for yourself." .

Sakura was on the battlefield. She saw his shadow before she saw him, that familiar line of his shoulders. .

Up next: Sasuke and Sakura meet again.

Notes: double cliffhanger...don't be mad? :) though i hope some of your questions are starting to be answered.

also, we're more than halfway through now! this chapter through the end were the hardest to write--thank you for following along with me!

#sasusaku #sasusaku fanfiction #sasusaku fanfic #ss fic #ss #my ss #my fic #the time being

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chachkayes · 4 years ago

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Are You With Me? - Mer x Hayes

Hey all! I wrote this fic based on the scene where Hayes finds Meredith passed out in the parking lot and continued the scene based on partially how I think it’ll go, and also how I hope it’ll go as a die hard Merhayes stan. I based the title of the fic on the song “Are You With Me” by nilu, which is featured in the season 14 episode “Personal Jesus”. I’d highly recommend listening to it if you haven’t already. It’s so good.

----------------------------------------------

“No. No!” Cormac Hayes’ worst nightmare was coming true. Just as he was heading out for the night, he was faced with Meredith Grey, laying unresponsive on the Grey-Sloan parking lot pavement. Cormac dropped his bag and ran to her side. “Grey! Grey!” He called out to her, praying that she would wake up and look at him. He knelt down beside her, placing a hand on her shoulder gently. “Grey, can you hear me?” Everything he’d ever feared since meeting Meredith was happening. He called for help, and several hospital staff came to their aide. As he handed out orders to quickly get Meredith to safety, he held her neck and checked for a pulse. He looked over her and tried to find any signs of life. “Can you hear me, Grey?” He asked again. He wanted nothing more than for her to open her eyes. God, this couldn’t happen again. He knew he wouldn’t survive if he lost her as well. “Grey, come on. Stay with me, Grey.” He was pleading to her, to God, and to Abigail. He felt all the emotions he’d had when Abigail was in her final days start to creep into his system. “I’m here, don’t worry. You’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.” He kept repeating it until he couldn’t anymore. Mostly in hopes that Meredith somehow could hear him but couldn’t respond, and also to keep himself calm.

Part of him felt partially responsible for whatever happened. She was tired and yet he paged her to go into surgery. He’d heard her talking to Jackson about how she was jealous that he had been in an OR and not her. He knew he had a patient that needed a general surgeon, he figured it’d make her happy – and it did, and part of him selfishly wanted to spend time alone with her. Had the surgery set her over the edge? Was it too much? ‘No, Cormac. No time to think like that.’ He thought to himself. ‘Not right now, not when you’re trying to save her life. She needs you to be strong for her.’ Where was the damn gurney? With still no sign of any staff returning, Cormac was petrified that Meredith was running out of time. So, he gently picked her up and rushed her towards the ER. He couldn’t waste any more time waiting outside.

As he reached the doors to the ER, he saw Bailey, Koracick, and Altman gearing up. Cormac had mixed feelings about this – he was glad that the nurse who’d ran inside had alerted others to help him, but he was upset that he couldn’t get the gurney quick enough.

“Hayes, what the hell happened?” Bailey said as he laid Meredith down. Altman and Koracick immediately surrounded her and started hooking her up to monitors. “I… I don’t know. I was going to leave, and I just saw her laying there on the ground. I don’t know what happened.” He turned away from Meredith for a moment to put on a trauma gown and gloves, then immediately returned to her side. He was so relieved when he turned around and the monitors confirmed her heart was still beating. He looked to the nurse who was with him in the parking lot and asked her to go get his bag from the pavement. It had his scrappy old N95, which he’d need if he wanted to help them with Meredith at all.

He couldn’t help but be pissed at himself for not telling Meredith about his feelings for her earlier. He was scared of them and what they meant. That fear seemed so insignificant now. So stupid. He could lose her, the only other person that understood him.

“She’s dehydrated, and it looks like she probably passed out from exhaustion. I guess it’s a good thing she passed out in the parking lot and not in her car. And it’s even better that you found her.” Koracick said after shining his flashlight in her eyes to make sure her pupils hadn’t blown. The nerves were eating Cormac up inside.

“I’m concerned about how low her oxygen levels are. I want to get her hooked up to IV fluids and continuous O2 until those levels improve” Teddy said as she grabbed the oxygen mask and placed it carefully over Meredith’s face. Bailey could see how distressed Cormac was about what had happened, he sat by Meredith’s side and held her hand, almost as if he were to let go, so would she. She placed a hand on his shoulder, and he looked up at her with tears welling in his eyes. “Dr. Bailey, is there anything I can do? Anything at all?” Cormac felt like he was a sitting duck – he wanted to do something to help out. He couldn’t just watch helplessly. Bailey sighed and racked her brain. “I’m worried she caught COVID. Get into full COVID equipment and then do not leave her side. Monitor her - you page me or Altman if anything looks off. She’s also going to need a familiar face to wake up to.” Hayes nodded and stood up, looking down at Meredith’s hand in his. Reluctantly, he let go to quickly get into his gear. Bailey grabbed her hand right afterwards. Cormac sprinted to get into his scrubs and full PPE, as well as text his son that there was an emergency and he wouldn’t be home that night.

When he returned, they were admitting Meredith and getting ready to transport her to her room. He walked beside her gurney, looking back to see her vitals every few seconds. When they finally settled in the room, Hayes took a seat right beside Meredith. Not too long after, Bailey, Koracick, and Altman left, leaving Hayes alone to take care of Meredith, and think about every worst possible case scenario.

Hours passed – Meredith’s vitals were still stable, but she still hadn’t woken up. Still holding her hand, he leaned back into his chair and closed his eyes. He talked to Abigail and prayed that Meredith would wake up, then tried to get some rest. 3 hours later, Hayes was abruptly woken up by a small squeeze on his hand. He woke up immediately and saw that Meredith’s eyes were still closed. “Grey? Grey, can you hear me? I’m right here.” She squeezed his hand again. “Okay, Grey – you need to open your eyes.” Very slowly, Meredith opened her eyes and looked beside her. Cormac breathed a giant sigh of relief. He smiled at her, and she returned the smile. He had never been so relieved to see it. Weakly, she spoke. “What happened?” Cormac could tell that she was still tired and very confused. “I found you laying on the ground in the parking lot. You were dehydrated and exhausted. Your oxygen levels were concerning, so we tested you for COVID. It’s why you’ve got your mask on and the nasal cannula.” He locked eyes with her. He didn’t ever want to break it. “And?” She asked. “We haven’t gotten the results of your test back yet; we’re taking precautions just in case. I have to hand it to you, Grey. You gave me one hell of a scare out there.” He told her, which prompted a slight laugh from her. “I seem to be pretty good at doing that to everyone.” Cormac looked down and let out a dry chuckle. He looked back up at her and took in every feature of hers.

“Can you take a deep breath for me?” He asked her. She nodded and took in a deep breath. “Did that hurt?” He followed up. “Only a little.” Meredith could see the light in Cormac’s eyes flicker out a little when she said that. “Hayes, let’s not worry until we have to.” Meredith sighed and let her eyes drift around the room. “You know, while I was out, I actually thought I was dead.” She commented after a few fleeting moments of silence. “How come?” Cormac tilted his head, confused. “I saw Derek. We were on a beach together, and he called out to me. I thought I had died and was meeting Derek in the afterlife.” Cormac smiled at Meredith; he was glad she didn’t die but she was so happy to have seen Derek. “That must have been amazing.” She smiled at him; he was the only one who could understand why she was so happy. “It was. It truly was.” He gazed deeply at her. “No matter what happens with your test, I don’t regret staying with you. I’m just glad you woke up. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I’d lost you.” She grabbed his hand again and gave him a small smile while gazing softly into his eyes. They sat in silence for a while, then they lightly chatted while enjoying each other’s company until Bailey came by about an hour later.

#merhayes #merwidow #meredith x hayes #hayes x grey #meredith x cormac #grayes #cormac hayes #cormac x meredith #hayes x meredith #mcwidows

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drethanramslay · 4 years ago

Note

26, 58 and 61 for ethan x mc please? like angst in the beginning but fluff in the end. thanks!! i love your fanfics btw i read it like 100 times and i can’t seem to get over it.

Aww thanks anon ☺️ and thank you for the ask ❤️❤️

You can find the prompt list here.

#26-“Are you angry…?”

#58-“Where have you been?!”

#61-“I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have done that, you can look after yourself…I shouldn’t have…I’m sorry.” this prompt is in the form of a text message

Author's note: okay anon I know you wanted a fluffy ending BUT, I decided to write it as a continuation to Hard for me i.e the prompt in which people demanded asked for a part 2

So forgive me for the ending

Word count: 1.2K

Warning: none, it's just angsty as hell

Cry for me

The next one week was painful.

Ethan's confession in the lift had left Leah in a flux of emotions. On one hand she was joyous that he returned her feelings and that he was all in.

But on the other hand she felt gut wrenching guilt which slowly started eating away at her sanity. She was in a relationship with Bryce. She had a freaking boyfriend but that still didn't stop her from pining for Ethan.

She was so lost in her thoughts half the times, zoning in and out of conversations. Bryce could see something bothering her so he slowly formulating a plan to cheer her up.

"Hey Princess?" Bryce asked as they drove to the hospital.

Leah snapped her head towards Bryce. "Yeah?"

“Are you angry…? Did I do something wrong?"

"Of course not, queen B!" I am angry with myself and the world.

"I just... Can't see you so down and lost. You know you can talk to me, right?"

I don't think I can talk about how I am completely and utterly in love with my boss and the fact that he returns the sentiments.

"Yap I know. It's just been a stressful week, y'know?"

"What if we have a movie night today? We can eat junk food and laugh on trashy movies?" Bryce spoke up as they got out of the car.

"That's exactly the thing I need. Thank you Bryce." Leah smiled at him and wrapped her arm around his waist, giving him a side hug.

Bryce gave her a breathtaking smile and wrapped his arms around her. "Anything for you Leah."

As they stood there, with their arms around each other in the parking lot, Leah failed to notice a pair of stormy blue eyes burning into her back.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------- After changing into her scrubs and grabbing a coffee from the coffee cart, Leah made her way towards Ethan's office. June and Baz were sitting and drinking coffee, pouring over the charts while Ethan wrote on the whiteboard.

"Good morning team." Leah greeted them with a smile.

"Good morning, Leah!"

"Good morning, Dr. Garcia."

"You are late. Where have you been?"

Leah's eyes snapped to the clock above the whiteboard.

8:00 am.

"I was getting the charts. And I am not late. We start the meeting at 8am." Leah said as she placed her laptop and coffee on the table.

"Dr. Garcia, this is not your 9 to 5 corporate job where you enter and leave at a given time. You are a doctor and time should cease to exist because our patient's life is in the palm of our hands. Every minute you spend wasting time, that much is cut from our patient's life. Have you forgotten your Hippocrates oath?"

Leah wanted to answer back, but she bit her tongue. NOT worth it Leah, calm down.

So clenching her jaw and swallowing down the humiliation, she responded in a curt voice. "Yes Doctor."

"Tardiness in not acceptable. Is that clear?"

Baz interrupted, trying to diffuse the situation. "Ethan she wasn't even that lat-"

Cutting Baz off, his icy eyes bored into her angry hazel ones. "Dr. Garcia, am I clear?"

"Crystal." Leah spoke up, glaring at Ethan.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------- And that's how the entire day continued. When working the case they were like a well oiled machine but outside in the hallways, they would glare at each other as if they wanted to kill each other.

The tension between Ethan was so thick that you could cut it with a knife. They butted heads throughout the duration of the shift that even the staff noticed.

Leah felt like a ticking time bomb, threatening to explode. Anger, frustration and pain is a very dangerous cocktail together, and now she had all of them whirling inside her like a tornado.

I'm gonna fucking confront him. That son of a bitch has it coming. Leah thought to herself, her teeth grinding.

So when she saw Ethan head towards the stairwell, she followed him.

"Dr. Ramsey, wait up."

"If it isn't patient related, don't bother me."

Leah rushed after him and grabbed him by his elbow with incredible strength, causing him to stop and turn towards her.

"What has gotten over you Ethan?"

"I don't know what you are talking about." He crossed his arms and stood there, towering over her.

"You are a smart guy. Acting dumb doesn't suit you. Now, let's try again, what has happened that has made you so pissed with me?"

"Rookie, I'm not mad at you."

"Yes you are!! You said Rookie in B flat and that only happens when I have royally pissed you off. And last time I checked I haven't done anything wrong-"

"What you did wrong, was crash into my life. What you did wrong, was try to cheer me up on a bad day. What you did wrong, was comfort me in my pain. What you did wrong was have faith in me when I was in doubt. What you did wrong, was make me fall for you."

Leah's jaw dropped. What sort of backhanded compliment was that? Clearing her throat and squashing the butterflies in her stomach, she spoke. "Ethan you can't say things like this to me."

"Why not? It's the truth. I like you way too much for my liking." He said in a low voice.

Leah threw her hands in the air. "Because, I am in a freaking relationship! You had your chance and you blew it. Don't Gove me mixed feelings now."

"I-"

"No now you will listen. You pushed me away. You said that you wanted space. You wanted my professional development. You wanted things to go back to normal. This is the new normal, okay? Accept it."

For a first time in a very long time, he looked helpless and guilty. "I was so wrong sunshine..."

Leah stuffed her hands in her coat and looked down at her lavender converse. She was at a complete loss of words. If things would have been easier she would have kissed him and hugged the sadness out of him.

But life is complicated. And everything has a price.

"So that's it huh? So..." Gulping Ethan continued, "You are over me?"

Silence.

Her brain was screaming at her to say yes and to move on from the angsty and painful chapter of her life. But she could not get herself to say it.

"If things were not as fucked up as they were... Do you think we would be a thing?"

Sighing she patted his arm. "I think you are smart enough to figure that out."

Leah side stepped him and climbed down the steps and opened the door of the stairwell to find Bryce standing there, a deer caught in the headlight expression on his face.

Leah greeted him, curiosity laced in her voice. "H..hey?"

Bryce immediately turned and started walking away fast.

"Bryce wait up."

This is some deja vu.

Bryce stopped and turned towards her, pain shining in his eyes. "Is it true?"

"What?"

"That you have feelings for Dr. Ramsey."

Shit shit shit. An alarm went on in her brain which caused her to freeze up.

"I-" Leah started but she was interrupted.

"I heard everything."

Leah took a deep breath. Cat’s out of the bag. No point denying it. "Please don't jump to conclusions. I-" her pager beeped, signalling that a VIP patient had arrived and she sighed.

"I need to go now. I will talk to you tonight. Please don't do anything rash. I beg you."

Without saying a word, Bryce shrugged and walked away.

Why is does it feel like the two important men of my life walked away from me in a span of 2 minutes?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was nine in the night and Leah was finally done with her rounds. Wearing her jeans and jumper, she tied her hair long black locks into a messy bun and stared at her reflection in the mirror.

Letting out a breath, she gave herself a pep talk. Okay Leah... You have to make a decision. You are not Hannah Montana. You can't have the best of both worl-

Her phone pinged, interrupting her. She picked it up to see that it was a text from Ethan.

Letting out a sigh, she picked up her messenger bag and walked out of the hospital, only one thing running in her head.

Who do I listen to? My head thats telling me that Ethan will hurt me again and that Bryce is better? Or my heart which tells me that Ethan is my one shot at true love?

It was painful to write this

Also the last part got 88 notes so lets get this to 90 notes so that I have motivation to write part 3 heheheheh

what do you think will happen in the next part?

ALSO GIVE ME SUGGESTIONS FOR WHAT I SHOULD NAME THIS SERIES

I love you guys

Permanent Tag list: @trappedinfandoms @oofchoices @agent-breakdance @dailydoseofchoices @tyrilstouch @siaramsey @theeccentricbibliophile @ac27dj @ramseysno1rookie @justanotherrookie @openheart12 @jamespotterthefirst @checkurwindow @chasingrobbie @junggoku @bellcat2010 @choicesstan1 @mvalentine @crazynutella @hatescapsicum @anonymously-cool @nooruleman @sanvivrma

Ethan x MC Taglist: @ethandaddyramsey @edith-eggs1 @pixelberryownsme @samihatuli @loveellamae @x-kyne-x @paulfwesley @zeniamiii @binny1985 @an-urban-witch-ig @ramseyegerton @mrsdr-ethan-ramsey @newcolonies @theodorepjames4 @unluckygs @choices-love-affair @kaavyaethanramsey @caseyvalentineramsey @ohramsey @squishywizardhq @junehiratas @lilyvalentine @itsgoingnuts @choicesfanaf @humanpokemon @temptress-of-death-and-desire @rookiefromedenbrook @courtesanofedenbrook @hatescapsicum @sanchita012 @edgiestwinter @fabi-en-ciel @mrsdrakewalkerblog @elwetritsche75 @livingpurpose @drramseysownsme @queencarb @andromedasinclaire @schnitzelbutterfingers @thanialis @floatingmeera @rookieoh @ethanramseyswhore @lucy-268 @big-yikers @have-aheart @whimsicalreader @tsrookie @itschoicesfanaf @lilypills @mals-chesthair @raleigheffingcarrera @utterlyinevitable @choices-fangirl-yeet @rookie-ramsey @papinaveensbitch @custaroonie @helloayzcream @hyperlightgrifter

#anushka writes #writing prompts #oh Ethan #ethan ramsey #ethan x mc #dr ethan ramsey #ethan jonah ramsey #ethan ramsey one shot #ethan ramsey x mc #open heart #open heart mc #open heart 2 #ohsy #choices #choices oh #playchoices #choices stories you play #choices stories we play #pixelberry

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mitsuki-murakami · 5 years ago

Text

zero o’clock [Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader]

“Hello, hello. I’m glad you survived the 2018 tumblr purge.

It’s been a long time since I sent in a request *cracks knuckles* Can you do #3 from the dialogue prompt for Oikawa or Kuroo (your choice) making a mistake? This gonna be gud.

#3: “How could you think that this wouldn’t hurt me?”

Requested by: @thenerdyrebel

Hello!! This is Kuroo’s version of the same prompt! I wanted to do both Kuroo and OIkawa for this prompt considering this came in so late huhu I hope this makes up for it! Thank you for your patience uwu

Warning: ANGSt angst but also a lot of fluff

***

Light flashes through the curtains of the window, illuminating the blanket that’s somewhat wrapped around your limbs entangled with Kuroo’s.

Thunder follows.

You feel him pull you closer to you, placing your head right on the curve of his chest, where you used to voluntarily nestle in during nights like this. Tonight was a different case. You hadn’t even considered sleeping in the same bed as him. Not after that huge argument that you just had with him. But as soon as the rain poured, there was no way that Kuroo was going to allow you to go someplace else by yourself. You didn’t even agree to his offer to drive you home, reasoning that it was going to slippery to safely drive.

He gave you the bed early on that night. He didn’t mind sleeping on the couch. That worked until the rain got stronger and thunder started to rattle the walls of your shared bedroom. You contemplated for a good minute or so, thinking if you should ask him to stay beside you until you fell asleep. But as soon as you cracked open the door to the living room, you found him awake, waiting for you to ask him to come inside.

No words were spoken. Only the rustling of sheets and the tired ruffling of his hair was heard from Kuroo. You briefly met with his hazel eyes in the darkness but he avoided from staring too long. No need for longing gazes that would give away everything. He didn’t want to know what this meant. Hoping would only mean that it would hurt more. All he focused on was the fact that you needed him tonight, and he would oblige.

Even if the very thought of you in the arms of someone else on a night like this clawed at him more viciously than he thought it would.

Sounds of each other’s erratic breathing filled the room. Sleep wasn’t going to come easy for either of you. The only thing that made sense at that moment was that the two of you savored the moment that the both of you were longing for in ages. So you hugged back, moving upwards to bury your face onto the crook of his neck instead. Your breaths tickled his neck while he moved to run his fingers through your hair, effectively causing your eyes to flutter shut momentarily, its last view being the red glare of the clock on the bedside reading 23:46.

The thunder no longer came, but he was still holding onto you for dear life.

Your eyes opened to see 00:00 blinking across the room. It was then that you decided to sit up. Both of you were calm enough, but not relaxed enough to be able to get some sleep. Although you wanted to stay in his arms forever, you knew that this wouldn’t fix any of the wounds that you both left on each other after fighting. Talking would. Understanding what you did wrong to make him say those things would.

You pulled yourself from his arms, propping yourself up on one of your elbows. You attempted to sit up, but you looked to see that Kuroo’s hand was wrapped around your other arm. You wanted to only glance at him, but his eyes held your gaze in place, seeming as if it were glowing in the darkness. It was glassy.

“Don’t leave. Me.” His voice cracked in the middle of his sentence. Maybe from disuse, but most likely because he was breaking. The view of you hovering over him despite your attention being somewhere else was piercing.

A sigh left you. You leaned down to kiss his forehead. “I won’t. I love you. I just want to talk.” The breath that he had been holding since you had moved was released. He slowly let go of your arm with the guidance of your hand. You untangled your legs from his and removed the blanket from your lap.

You finally sat up and hugged your legs and rested your chin on your knees. You weren’t completely facing him and instead stared at the clock that read 00:02. Kuroo was still lying on the bed, his eyes never leaving you, as you waited until 00:05 to muster up the courage to speak.

“I’m sorry I made you think that I was,” you paused. You couldn’t even say the words.

“Cheating on me.”

“Yeah.”

“I wouldn’t think that if you’d only tell me where you’ve been for the past two nights.” He responded quickly, shifting until he could lean against the headboard, his hands resting on his stomach. “Don’t even try to tell me that you were at work--”

“And if I was? You can look at how many hours I’ve logged in that stupid place.”

“Who the hell works until 11?” He retorted through gritted teeth.

“If you knew better you’d know that the answer was me.”

“I--God. I want to believe you but you’re making it so hard for me to do that.” You glanced at him again. He was curled away now, too. You then buried your face in your hands to try to stop yourself from sobbing, but you failed.

“I knew that I could handle this job as soon as I got it, I really did. Turns out I could handle it more than any intern ever could. But the only thing I couldn’t handle was this stupid jerk of a resident and I just--”

“Hey. hey, no,” he called as he removed your hands from your face to wipe away the tears that came. “Don’t cry, okay? It’s okay, we can fix this.” You calmed down and leaned into his touch, sniffling.

“I can go there first thing in the morning and talk to whoever this jerk is and--” you flinched away, causing him to stop midway.

“And ruin everything I worked so hard for? See, this is why I can’t tell you these kinds of things! You always immediately take it upon yourself to protect me like I’m a damsel in distress when I don’t need you to!”

“And you don’t hide everything from me and shoulder things like you have to do this all on your own?” That made you pause.

“Whether you realize it or not, we’re in a relationship. This works only if you talk to me. From there I’ll know how to help you, because you’re not alone, okay? I can and I will do this with you.”

“You just care so much don’t you?” You shot back, sarcasm dripping. “I don’t need your help with this. Half the time I’m stressing myself out trying to do my job and the other half I spend trying to not show you how stressed out I am because you always react like I want you to fix everything for me!”

He pulled away from you in disbelief, “I’m just trying to help you--”

“I’m telling you I don’t need you!” You replied, all the pent up stress and exhaustion for the past week shooting out all at once.

He tried to avert his gaze to hide the tears threatening to spill over, but he wasn’t quick enough.

“No, Tetsurou, I-I didn’t mean that, I swear.” You attempted to reach out to him, but it was like there was a barrier stopping you.

Cold ran throughout your veins, causing you to start shuddering. How do I take it back? How do I take everything back?

“Just like you didn’t mean to ignore my calls? My messages reminding you to eat your lunch? My asking you to eat one meal with me after you’ve locked yourself in this room for almost two days to ‘catch up’ on some reading?” His words were momentarily cut off with a bitter laugh, as if all of this was some sort of sick joke that he didn’t want to participate in.

“I know you don’t think you don’t need my help, but honestly? If I wasn’t hovering over you for the past month, you’d probably be stuck in the same hospital ward you spend so much time running around in, but you would be the patient instead.”

“I know how much you value your job and how much you overcame to even land it, but how could you think that you need to hide how much you were running yourself ragged, to me? You’re killing yourself over this job. You’re hurting yourself so much to prove that I don’t need to worry over you, but how could you think that this wouldn’t hurt me?”

You were rendered speechless. He was right. He was right-- you had no clue how much it hurt him to watch you neglect yourself, to watch how you neglected to let him take care of you even though he was well within his rights to act like he had been acting.

Kuroo no longer hid his face. He stared outside the window, his fists clutching hard on the blanket that laid on his lap to the point where it turned white. He almost knocked himself out to not choke on his own sobs, and still, one escaped, wrecking his frame.

You took it as a sign to wrap your arms around his middle, resting your forehead on his. You held him there, even if he didn’t move at all, except for the occasional hitching of his breath. The tension faded away and the silence that was once so testing morphed into one of comfort.

Eventually, his hands found its way to your face, reaching towards the back of your neck to tug you closer to him. Glad that he was finally holding you, the tear tracks on your face that were about to dry up suddenly dampened again.

“Thank you,” you managed to breathe out despite the lump in your throat becoming increasingly more difficult to swallow. “Thank you for taking care of me, Tetsurou.”

He didn’t respond, instead he only leaned back enough to see your face slightly illuminated by the street lights outside. He wiped your tears before he nestled his forehead against yours again, closing his eyes at the warmth that spread across his body from your touch.

“I’m sorry. I love you. I love you so much.” You took one of his hands and held it between yours, pressing his knuckles against your lips. It was one of your ways to show your affection to each other. Be it less intimate than a kiss, or a hug even, it showed that you appreciated the efforts that you made for each other. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize sooner.”

“I know.”

“I’ll be better, I promise. I’ll take fewer shifts, I’ll even talk to the chief if I have to--”

“I know, I love you too.”

The thunder returned later on, waking you. But there was no need to think if you should ask him to stay beside you to fall asleep. He was right there beside you, awake and aware of your anxiousness. He wrapped himself around you almost instantly, covering your eyes by pulling you to his chest and covering your ears with his hands.

That night, you laid across him, instead of it being the other way around. Usually, it would be Kuroo who would put as much weight as he could on you without crushing you so he’d know when you’d leave his side in the morning. Tonight was a different case.

In the morning, Kuroo would finally wake up with you beside him. He would no longer have to frantically search for you in the house only for him to find that you had already gone to work.

***

Thank you for reading!

Hello!! How is everyone doing? I hope yall are healthy and safe!!

Special thanks to @capt-spangles and @sashimeh, I hope this cheers u up

Taglist:

@from-sejiou-to-the-stars @zephyrria

#Kuroo Tetsurou #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo x reader #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu!!#haikyuu #hq #hq!!#haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu oneshot #one shot #angst

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behindheremeraldeyes · 4 years ago

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title: duty calls chapter 2

[ch.1] [ffnet] [ao3]

summary: It’s been a while since the Uchiha moved out of her apartment, and so far, living with his best friend has proved itself to be quite the challenge. The pandemic was still far from over, and though they were both following the orders and staying inside, their hearts ached for the one who had to stay out there.

a/n: It’s finally here! Chapter 2 of Duty Calls, as we were all expecting it, and I just gotta thank you all for the wonderful feedback I’ve received after posting chapter 1! Here in Brazil, things are still far from being controlled, and though my family is fine, It’s still overwhelming to see all the numbers rising every day. I’ve tried to use a bit of my experience to continue this story and even if I know it was my way of coping, I understand that, for someone else, it might be too much, so take it easy, ok? Times are though, for sure, but we’ll get through this! Again, I hope you enjoy this fic, and as always, I would love to know your opinion on it!

And in a matter of 3 weeks, the city of Konoha was no longer the same.

Though safety measures had been taken and people had been careful, it all proved itself pointless once the first case of the new coronavirus was confirmed. The patient was a young man, around his thirties, who had just returned from a business trip to the Sand Country. The protocols were followed and he was isolated from the rest of the society, but by the time the sanitary agents had finished talking to his neighbours, the second case was confirmed, and eventually, the third, fourth, tenth and the hundredth. The numbers wouldn’t stop as countless new cases were popping up every day, and it was possible to see the silent fear that had taken over the city.

At first, the infection was nothing but a faraway reality to most citizens. It was just something people were talking about on the news and no one really felt like it had anything to do with them. They thought it would never happen to them. However, the virus got closer, to the point where everyone knew of someone who tested positive. Most stories, sure, were about asymptomatic people who had nothing more than a headache, but whenever those stories escalated— whenever someone they knew ended up unconscious and with a tube down their throat— that was when people got really afraid.

In every district, rough metal doors now decorated the streets, and instead of colourful shop windows inviting the costumers to come inside, only closed signs and motivating messages could be seen. “It will pass”, “we will get through this”, “stay inside” and so many others that would only be seen by those who had a good reason to leave the safety of their houses. Those messages— and so many other entertaining initiatives suggested by digital influencers and famous artists—, for sure, were very uplifting at the beginning of the whole pandemic, when most people actually believed everything would be solved in a week or two.

Up until then, the COVID-19 was nothing but a global adventure for those who weren’t sick— or at least didn’t know they were—and it would be over before anyone got the chance to even become bored. It would be a chance to take a break from everything and sleep until noon for a couple of days before life returned to normal.

'Soon it would all be over', they said, and people were truly satisfied with just that.

'Soon'.

But as the days went by and the situation started to go south, people realized that their precious ‘soon’ would take longer than any of them had initially planned.

By the end of March, people weren’t as excited as they used to be, and now, as everyone watched as Spring went by through closed windows, hope was no longer a familiar feeling and fear had invaded most of the residences around the city. The citizens had turned pessimistic regarding the uncertain future, and some of them were even going through the 7 stages of grief as they mourned their long-lost life.

Times were tough. For those who could stay at home and for those who couldn’t but forced themselves to, times were really tough.

Even for those who don’t usually go out that much, staying stuck inside 4 walls was proving itself to be quite the challenge. Staring at the same things and at the same people— if there even were people— was starting to take its toll on everyone, and there were days when it was just too much. Sure, every case was a case and people reacted differently to the current situation, but eventually, everyone was due to get sick of that life.

And Uchiha Sasuke was no exception.

After his girlfriend kicked him out in order to protect him, the raven haired boy ended up staying with his best friend. For they were always together, Naruto’s guest-room was basically the Uchiha's spare room, and it’s proven itself quite useful whenever he and the pinkette engaged in one of their lover’s spat.

They didn’t fight much, but when they did—well— it was better to stay out of it.

Still, even if he didn’t have to spend two months sleeping on a couch, to say sharing the apartment with the blonde was easy would be a huge lie. They’re too different, both of them. Though best friends since they were in their dippers, both Sasuke and Naruto have very strong personalities and it doesn’t take much for them to start a fight. They’re stubborn, hot-headed and neither of them would even dream about admitting to be mistaken. In other words, chances were that they would end up killing each other before the end of the quarantine.

The Uchiha needed space. He needed a full day without listening to that annoying ‘dattebayo!’ or seeing those ramen cups pilling up all over the sink. The blonde wouldn’t move a finger to help with the chores, and if it depended on him, the trash would stay there until it decomposed itself. Naruto is a slob and living with him has made Sasuke reconsider his early life choices.

How could someone who leaves his unwashed clothes all around the place be his best friend?

Their friendship, as the Uchiha concluded, was not meant to be put to test like that. They should have never been forced to share the same roof for more than 7 days and the pandemic was nowhere near its end.

There was no way both of them would survive another month together. They had to do something. They had to talk things through and establish some rules in order to make that whole experience less traumatic. Sasuke was more than aware of that, but there was just no way he would be the first to suggest anything, no.

Naruto would have to grow up and admit to be a failure as a productive member of the society.

And until that happened, the only thing the raven haired boy could do was sulk. Sulk and take long showers so he could completely ignore Naruto’s existence for a while.

Yes, those long showers were probably the one thing keeping the Uchiha from murdering his best friend, and right now, he was really glad to be taking one. The warm water running down his skin, soothing his muscles and taking his mind away from the messy apartment. During his showers, he could, for once, think clearly about what was happening in the world, and most importantly, what was probably happening to his girlfriend.

What could she be doing at that moment? Was the hospital already crowded? Was she okay?

Though they face-timed every day, it still wasn’t enough for him to ask all the questions that haunted his dreams and to just talk about nothing in order to make up for the lost time. Day after day, whenever her pretty face showed up on his computer screen, Sasuke could feel a heavy weight being lifted from his chest. Normally, she would be smiling and her bright, emerald eyes would shine brighter whenever he said anything about wanting to kill Naruto in his sleep.

After talking about their respective days, he would ask her if she was eating and sleeping properly, and even if she would always try to change the subject at that point, he would glare at her until she talked so he could scold her for being irresponsible. He would, then, ask her if she needed anything and tell her to go get some rest before the call ended. They never parted with a ‘goodbye’, choosing, instead, to say ‘I'll see you soon”. Even though they had never really talked about the reason behind that choice of words, through the silent glances exchanged by their eyes, it was possible to tell they both knew it.

Oh, they knew it too well. For she is a front-liner and he is no fool, they knew better than to just believe things would be solved in a matter of days. It would be long until they could finally meet face to face again— until they could feel their hands brushing against one another and the scent of their bodies pressed tight— so they figured that, in the midst of the chaos that was now wiping the world, they could allow themselves to be fooled by a white lie.

Their soon would come. When, they didn’t know, but it would come before either of them could say goodbye.

Though the hot water was doing wonders to both his body and soul, the Uchiha knew he couldn't stay there forever. After releasing a defeated sigh, he turned off the shower and wrapped a towel around himself. Water was still dripping from his hair as he dried his body, and the steam surrounding him clouded the mirror and every glassy object inside the bathroom. Apparently, he had spent too much time in there this time, he thought, but couldn’t find it in himself to care. He ran his fingers through his soaking, dark locks, ruffling them a bit as to prevent them from sticking to his face. He took a deep breath, then, and finally decided to leave his private, sacred shrine.

With no rush or excitement, the door finally opened and all the steam came out with him. The towel was still wrapped around his hips, and silently, the Uchiha started to make his way towards the bedroom. The apartment was quiet, at first, and he wondered if the Uzumaki went to the convenience store in order to buy more of that industrialized ramen he loves so much. Even if both him and Sakura were always telling him that he shouldn’t leave the house unless it was very important, Naruto apparently considered ramen a vital necessity.

He really is an idiot, Sasuke thought, as he was getting closer to his room. His hand was about to reach out for the doorknob, but before he could turn it—

“Ha! You look really funny like that-ttebayo! Have you ever worn so many clothes? And can’t you take some of them off?”

The Uchiha stopped. It was Naruto’s voice, and apparently, he was talking to someone. Dark eyes widened for an instance when he realized that it was coming from inside of his room, and before he could act on that, Sasuke allowed his best-friend the benefit of doubt regarding his reasons to be there.

Could the dobe be having a private conversation with someone? Was it work related or could he be chatting with a girl? That idiot should better not be doing anything disgusting or—

“Okay, I see that you have to go now. As soon as he leaves his beauty shower, I’ll let Teme know you called. Bye-bye, Sakura-chan!”

Sakura, Sasuke thought, as his heart skipped a beat. Why was she calling at such hour? It hadn’t even been 5 hours since her last shift had ended, so what was she doing awake at that moment? There was something wrong, he thought. He really should ask her and—

Shit.

His mouth went agape as soon as he remembered Naruto’s ‘bye-bye’ and before he could even think, the door was already flying open.

“Oi, Naruto, don’t hang up—“

“Ah!” Naruto screamed, blue eyes widening as he rolled over the bed and fell on the floor. Luckily, he was wearing wireless earphones, so the computer— Sasuke’s computer— didn’t share the blonde’s fate.

“Tch.” Sasuke scoffed, clearly not caring if Naruto was fine or not. He walked pass the blonde in order to reach his computer, but his efforts proved useless for the call had already ended. The Uchiha closed his eyes in annoyance, cursing himself— and Naruto— for not being able to talk to the pinkette. For a couple of seconds, he kept staring at his computer screen, wondering if he should call her back or not.

What if it was an emergency? No, Naruto wouldn’t have been so calm if that had been the case. Maybe she just needed something from him? But that could wait until after she had slept. Thanks to his current state of overprotection towards her, his mind was playing tricks on him and nothing seemed logic.

What could she possibly want from him? And why wasn’t she calling from her usual ID? Could it be that she had been robbed or—

“Ouch!” The blonde said, sitting with his legs crossed on the floor. “Why the hell did you scare me like that, teme!? That hurt-ttebayo!”

“Stop whining like a child, Naruto. Why the hell didn't you tell me Sakura was calling?”

“Because you were taking your precious shower.”

“So what?”

“Last time I interrupted your you-time, you scolded me for hours and told me never to do that again!”

“But this was Sakura calling. It was important!”

“So was that documentary about koalas!”

“You are an idiot, Naruto!” The Uchiha sighed, walking towards the desk near his bed to reach out for his phone. He was clearly aware that trying to discuss that matter with the blonde would lead to nothing, so he decided to just skip all that nonsense. “I'm just gonna call Sakura and ask her myself.”

“Don’t sweat it. She won’t answer you-ttebayo.”

“And why not?”

“Because she’s finally opened her eyes to see the big jerk you are.”

“Naruto!”

He giggled. It was always too easy. "She's busy right now.”

“Busy?” He lifted his brows in confusion, checking the hour on his phone just to make sure. “Why is she busy right now? She said she wasn’t be going back to the hospital until later tonight.”

“Yeah…about that” Naruto started, scratching his cheek with one finger. “She said there was a problem at the hospital and she had to go cover for someone who tested positive.”

“What? Did she have to go now?”

“Yep.” He nodded. “In fact, she even called from the hospital computer. I barely recognized her with all of those masks and glasses. I took a screen shot of her for future blackmail-ttebayo!”

“Fuck.” He cursed, closing his eyes in pure annoyance and using his fingers to massage his temples. Apart from the dobe’s stupid idea of fun, knowing his girlfriend was already back in the hospital made his heart feel heavier inside his chest.

If they were asking her to get back and cover for someone, Sasuke figured things were probably getting worse out there. It was expected for some health professionals— if not most of them— to be contaminated, but seeing a person who’s always working so close to other various diseases being defeated by this virus was never really easy. In fact, whenever that happened, the entire world was silenced.

Another soldier was down. Another health worker, just like Sakura, who would be lucky enough if they were able to stay home and healthy for 14 days.

Knowing things like that were happening so close to his girlfriend and knowing she would be the one suffering the consequences left him even more worried. She was probably still tired from the previous night, and knowing her like he does, Sasuke was sure she wasn’t even aware of that. Haruno Sakura is a workaholic, has always been. She loves her job and she’s one hell of a good doctor, but all that love and dedication has taken its toll on her life many times before.

For working has become her coping mechanism, Sakura tended to forget about herself whenever the hospital demanded more from her, and now, during the pandemic, things were no different. In fact, they were getting worse and worse by the day, and even if Sasuke called her every day to guarantee she was doing well, it was not the same as when he could actually be there.

She was ignoring herself, he knew. On March 28th, when they called her in order to wish her a happy birthday, the pinkette didn’t even know what day it was. He had scolded her for that, sure, but he knew it was useless. She was going to keep working herself to the bones, and the only thing he could do was face-time her during dinner time.

Really helpful, he thought, bitterly. Still, it was better than nothing. Every victory against workaholic Sakura was already a great victory, and considering the current scenario, it was all he could do.

Almost all.

“Did she say anything else, Dobe?” He asked, his voice filled with displeasure.

“Oh, right!” He nodded, eagerly. “She also asked you to order her some groceries online since she won’t have time to go to the supermarket herself.”

“Hn.” The Uchiha started, sitting on his bed and getting his laptop in order to access the website of her usual grocery store. Since the beginning of the pandemic, that small shop near her apartment has developed a delivery service for usual customers, and they were even making a special offer for people who were still out there. It was really nice to see so many people looking out for each other, and on behalf of his girlfriend, he could only thank those kinds of initiatives.

“Oh! And she also said not to pay for her. She told you to use her credit-card or else she will be pissed like last time-ttebayo!”

“Tch. That audio she sent me was unnecessary.”

“I thought it was very hilarious.”

“Shut up.” Sasuke pouted, his eyes staring at the screen and choosing the items.

“Heh” Naruto smirked, crawling so he could approach the Uchiha. "What are you gonna buy her, Teme?”

“The essential, of course.”

“Essential?!” The blonde repeated, a bit exasperatedly. “Jeez, teme! Let me see it.” The blonde stated, reaching for Sasuke’s computer in order to see what he was adding to the cart.

“Oi, knock it off!”

“Onions, tomatoes, vegetables, raw meat… You really don’t know how to buy food, bastard.”

“What? I don’t see what’s the matter with these things. It’s what I usually buy for us. It’s enough to prepare good and healthy meals.”

“Yeah, I’m sure they are, but you’re forgetting something very important.”

“Oh, really? And what is it?”

“We have time to cook. And when I say we, I mean you.” He started, with a grin on his face. “She probably gets home exhausted most of the days and she definitely doesn't have enough energy to cook, so you have to buy something easy to prepare."

“Are you saying we should buy her a stock of frozen food and instant ramen; and ignore all the rest?” He said, sarcasm dripping from his tongue.

“Well, not a stock, but she definitely needs some frozen food and some bowls of instant ramen."

“She needs to eat properly, dumbass!”

“She needs to eat, bastard!” the blonde started, and even if the tone of his voice didn’t change much, somehow, the Uchiha could see the concern hidden in his words. Though he knew he wasn’t the only one worried about Sakura’s safety, sometimes, he tended to forget Naruto could also be a decent person in times of need. “Once she has enough energy and time to prepare decent meals, then we will worry about the properly part.”

“Hn.” Sasuke closed his eyes for a second before giving the blonde his usual stoic face. “I’m gonna put on some clothes. Don’t spend too much on this crap or else she will be mad and I will blame you.”

“Yosh!” A smile showed up on the Uzumaki’s face as he scrolled around the shop’s website. After spending some time isolated and helping his older neighbours with the groceries, Naruto knew exactly what he should buy for his girl-best-friend and he knew she would be thankful for a bowl of ramen whenever she got home and didn’t feel like cooking.

And so, even if leaving Naruto unsupervised around his things was quite a risky decision, Sasuke put on his clothes and left the room. He had his phone with him, and as soon as the blonde said he was finished, the Uchiha sent his girlfriend a message.

‘Groceries Ordered. Call me when you get home.’

After sending it, his dark eyes kept staring at her picture, a longing feeling taking over his heart. Sasuke remembered when she took that picture of herself, and mostly, he remembered how happy they all were while having dinner at Naruto’s favourite restaurant. It was just the three of them for the night, and even if he normally hates crowded places, for the first time, he hadn’t been bothered by the people around them. They were all laughing and her smile that night was brighter than all the lights of Konoha.

Her smile…

At that moment, in the middle of that mess, he couldn’t really recall when was the last time she truly smiled. In a matter of weeks, not only the pinkette, but all of them were deprived of reasons to be truly happy. They were worried, scared and too immersed in this pandemic to even think about happy.

Happy would happen after life got back to normal. Or, at least, as normal as it could get.

Without noticing, he took a deep breath, locking his phone screen and heading towards the kitchen so he could start preparing lunch. Waiting for a fast reply would be useless, he knew. Sakura barely had time to breath, let alone text someone; and using her phone at the hospital was yet another risk of taking the virus home. She would answer him when and if she could. And until then, he would do what he had to do.

As a normal citizen, he would continue to do his part.

–––––––––––––––––––

Her reply didn’t arrive until later that day.

The clock was already striking past 11pm and the blonde had long succumbed to his dreams. The midnight edition of the national news was about to start, and if the Uchiha had to be honest, he didn’t even know why he had left the tv on the news channel in the first place. The stories were all the same, the cases were growing and people were being hospitalized. They were all the same— and he knew it— but he had decided to leave that on anyway, and right now, after his phone had buzzed inside his pocket, he realized he had probably drifted off at some point.

His eyes blinked slowly as they adjusted to the bright screen, and though he had just woken up from a nap, all of the sleepiness had disappeared as soon as he read the notification with her name.

At last, he thought.

He used his fingerprint to unlock his phone and slowly, he stood up from the couch. He turned off the tv, and as he had started his way towards his room, he read the message she had just sent him.

‘I'm home. R u still up?’

‘Yeah' He answered, shortly, opening the door.

‘How about Naruto?’

‘Fast asleep.’

‘Ok. Is it too late for me to call you?’

Tch. Silly girl, he thought, clearly not even considering her concern. ’Turning on my computer. I’ll call you in a minute.’

‘Ok.’

While his computer loaded, the Uchiha made sure to connect his ear pods so they could have a private conversation. Though he was glad to know she was already home and answering his texts, he couldn’t seem to ignore that odd feeling growing inside his guts. He tried to shake it off while clicking the face-time icon, but it was of no use.

Maybe, he thought, it had something to do with the fact that he had just woken up. Maybe he was still a bit sleepy or, maybe, it was just a side effect from the pandemic playing tricks on him.

Yes, he was definitely overreacting, he concluded, as his ears were filled with those continuous beeps. Sakura was fine. She was certainly—

Oh, fuck.

As her image finally showed up on his computer screen, his eyes widened in pure shock and he was sure his sudden reaction didn't go unnoticed by his girlfriend. His lips slightly parted and he could feel his heart sinking inside his chest. Her face was red— swollen, even— and her eyes were bloodshot, emptied of any glimpse of light. Red, prominent lines were drawn across her face, going from the bridge of her nose and down until her chin, as they perfectly delineated the marks of the masks she had to wear during the whole day. Her lips were pale, filled with cracks, and though there were no tears at that moment, he could tell they were brimming her eyes.

The girl with the prettiest of the smiles and the brightest of the eyes was, at that moment, in the brink of a breakdown. She was biting her lower lip as if to hold back more tears and he could see the way her eyes fidgeted from the screen.

It was as if she couldn’t look him in the eyes, as if she was ashamed, guilty or even both. She looked so frail and uncharacteristic that, for a split of second, it felt as if that girl— that destroyed image that was meant to be Haruno Sakura— wasn’t her at all. He had never seen her like that, not even on her worst days.

Sakura…What on earth had happened to her?

After a couple of seconds spent in a deafening silence, the Uchiha bit the insides of his cheeks, forcing himself to break that state of pure horror. He blinked a couple of times, and then— only then— he was able to let his voice out. “What happened?”

No reply. Her lips started to tremble as she looked away from the computer, trying her best to recompose herself.

“Sakura.” He pressed. “What the hell happened?”

“Oh, my, I can’t do this.” She looked at the screen, her body language growing anxious by the second, her hands reaching for the mousepad. “I-I knew I shouldn’t have called you, I’m sorry. Everything is fine. Go back to sleep.”

“What!? No! You’re clearly not fine. Don’t hang up!”

“I’m sorry, Sasuke-kun, I—“

“If you do, I’ll take my car and drive to your place right now, Sakura! Don’t hang up.” He said, firmly, and thankfully, that made her stop.

“I-I don’t wanna trouble you.”

“Tch, don’t be stupid. I told you to call me if anything happened.” His voice held somewhat of a rough tone, and for a second, he could see that roughness had managed to make her listen to him. He took a deep breath, then, and after what felt like an eternal pause, Sasuke decided to be the one to start the conversation again. “First of all, just answer me this…Are you safe?”

She nodded, slowly, as if her head felt too heavy above her shoulders. “Yeah.” Her voice came out as a whisper, and though it was too fast, it just felt too much. It felt troubled, and if he dared say, ashamed, as if her safety was something unfair. Condemnable, even.

“Talk to me, Sakura.” His voice got lower, though anger still boiled inside his veins. Sasuke knew better than to let those emotions get the best of him, but he couldn’t help but what to blame someone— the whole world, for all he cared— for the pinkette’s current state. She was falling apart, and though he could see her in a screen less than 30 centimetres away from him, it pained him to know she was miles away from his reach.

Her eyes closed for a moment, and when they opened again, it was as if she had gathered some courage to finally put her feelings into audible words. She breathed in and out, but still not really looking into the webcam of her computer. “We’ve registered the first deaths today.” She started, her voice was rough, and though she was trying to sound professional— one of her many coping techniques— her emotions were taking the best of her. “And though it’s never easy to lose a patient, this time…Geez, It was so much worse.”

His heart skipped a beat at her words, and though he had listened to many of her hospital stories before, this one felt different. It felt heavier, macabre. “How worse?”

“We were making the rounds around the ICU when this guy, around his 70s, started calling our names. He sounded breathless and his oxygen levels started to drop so fast…” She bit her lip, her hand reaching out to her chest, clinging to her shirt. “He had been stable for three days already. He was making jokes and we even helped him call his wife yesterday because we were going to send him to a normal room, Sasuke-kun…But then, he suddenly couldn’t breath and—“ She paused, trying to find the next words as a tear slipped from her right eye. “—and when I saw it, my colleague was already intubating him and I was doing compressions because his heart had stopped, just like that.”

He could hear the sound of her exasperated breath, and for he knew she was still not done yet, Sasuke remained silent, giving her time to recollect her thoughts. There was still so much she had to let out. So much she had bottled up inside her chest and was now getting the best of her.

Such a strong woman. He wondered how much she had endured until it got that bad.

A muffled sob escaped her lips, and he knew she was ready— or anything remotely close to that— to continue her narrative. “He didn’t make it…We attested his death after half an hour or so, and now I remember looking at the people around me and we were just so…so taken back, you know? We weren’t expecting that outcome from that man, no. He was—“ Another tear slipped, and her voice cracked. “He was fine. He was recovering and he told his wife he was gonna go home. God, she cried so much on the phone when I told her.”

“Oh, Sakura…”

“But that was not all.” She swallowed, wiping her tears with the back of her hand. “Right after the impact of his death, a nurse called from the hallway, saying there was another patient in need of immediate assistance and… And we just left him there and it was as if we were relieving that whole thing, but with a woman around her 50s, instead.”

“And what happened to her?” He asked, lowly, though he was already sure of what her answer would be.

“We lost her, too.” She closed her eyes, dropping her head in mild despair. When she lifted it back, more tears were streaming down her face. “I knew we would not be able to save everyone from this virus and I knew there would be deaths, eventually, but…But I never thought we wouldn’t have time to mourn each of them. I thought we would have had time to think and to pay our respects before we were summoned again.” She gritted her teeth, anger now visibly spread across her exhausted featured. “Sasuke-kun, I thought things were going to be more humane even with those who died, but I was wrong! Now, they’re just numbers and there will be more like them soon. And their deaths will be on us!”

“Don’t even go there. It was not your fault and—“

“Yes, it was! We couldn’t save them, Sasuke-kun! And worse, we’re probably the ones spreading this crap out there! When we come home and when we go check other patients…This is on us."

“You’re wrong!”

“No, I’m not! People are scared of us, Sasuke-kun!!”

“What!? Who the hell would be stupid enough to be scared of you!?”

A smile filled with scorn and mockery took over her lips as she lifted her right hand. She was holding a white, small paper that looked like a post it, and as she turned it to the webcam, Sasuke just couldn’t believe what he was reading.

‘You’re gonna kill us all! Get out!’

His lips went agape as his mind tried to find the right words to describe what he was feeling. Seriously, how could people be so low? How could they be so cruel and insensitive towards another human-being who was just going home? These people really are beyond any salvation, he thought.

“I’ve found this note on my door when I got home today… And even if I don’t know whose handwriting is this, most of my neighbours are averting their eyes whenever I see them from afar… So, yeah, I guess I’m not imagining stuff."

“Sakura, you can’t let it get to you. These people don’t know what they’re talking about.”

“Yes, they do, Sasuke-kun.” She spoke, a little louder now. “They’re trying to protect themselves by staying at home and I’m the one bringing the virus to them! They will get sick, and then…And then they will be just number, too.”

Bitter tears were now flowing down her face and he knew she had finally let go of the very last string that held back her emotions and her anxieties. She was sobbing furiously, now, and at that moment, he really hated himself for not being there with her. Though he understood everything and was even tired of hearing her voice lecturing him about staying away, fuck, he just wanted to stomp out of the apartment and go to her. There wasn’t much he could do, for he couldn’t really give her the answer she wanted, but watching from afar as she crumbled apart was just too painful.

It wasn’t fair. That virus wasn’t fair to its victims and it sure as hell wasn’t fair to the front-liners who had to see such horrors repeating themselves day after day. The lack of a cure, the pressure to save lives and the uncertainty of the days that were to come. Just like her, many health workers were feeling powerless and lost in the middle of that chaos, and there was nothing anyone could do about it. In fact, even though people on Tv were showing their gratitude towards those who couldn’t stop working, reality showed how fear corrupted the human heart to the point where they didn’t think twice before being assholes in order to try to protect themselves.

Those were certainly rough times, where physical contact was banned, certainties were non-existent and there was no guarantee that anyone would find a solution before the next tragedy occurred.

The world was hurting. People were hurting.

But more importantly, for him, his girlfriend was hurting. And even if his heart was breaking for her, he knew he had to say something— anything— to help her get back on her feet. That was why she called, after all. She wanted his help since she was clearly not being able to manage it on her own. He had to help her. He had to be strong for both of them so she could once more be strong for those out there.

For she’s a practical and strong-willed woman, the Uchiha knew better than anyone that simple and heart-warming words would be of no use in order to calm her down, no. He would have to appeal to her good sense and her logical side. He had to remind her that, even if she was losing the battle, she was also the only one between them who stood a chance to win.

“Sakura.” He spoke, sounding firm so she could look at him. Her face had turned even redder due to the tears, and for an instance, he swore he saw her younger version who used to cry whenever the other kids were mean to her. He really had to bring her back. “What are you going to do now?”

“…What?”

“I've asked you, what are you going to do now?”

“I-I don’t know, I—“

"Are you going to give up?”

“Give up? No, I—“

"No doctor is forced to work during a pandemic if they don’t want to. You can quit, spend 14 days without leaving your apartment and then you can run back to your parents’. That’s an option.”

“Run back to my parents?” She asked, and the indignation behind her words gave him a certain hope that he was following the right direction.

“Yes. To be honest, I would feel quite better if you did it. Knowing you would be safe would spare me a lot of negative thoughts. We could even be together. That would be a good option, right?”

Through the cameras of their computers, they stared into each other’s eyes, and he made sure not to let his serious expression melt into a soft one. Dark eyes clashed against emerald ones, taunting them and daring the girl to take a stand. He was offering her a way out of that whole thing. He was showing her that there was another option if she felt like she couldn’t take it anymore.

Sakura could always give up and he had to make that option clear for her.

Clear enough so she could take the next step.

“Fuck you, Sasuke.”

Bingo.

Her eyes, though still red and a bit lifeless, were looking at him with a condemning stare. Though she had been looking like a child for the past hour or so, now he could finally see the traces of the mature woman she is. And even if it was still not enough to consider his job done, Sasuke could now hold onto something in order to bring her back.

“What? I’m just giving you an option.”

“No, you’re not.” She scoffed. “You know exactly what you’re doing, you jerk. You’re giving me a stupid option we both know I would never take just so you can make me feel less shitty.”

“Well…is it working?”

“…Maybe.” She said, softly, the tears now slowing down. “What will you do now?”

“Me? Hn, I should be the one saying this, don’t you think?” He looked at her with warmth in his eyes and he hoped she could feel it. “What are you going to do now, doctor?”

At first, she just stared at the screen, but slowly, her head started to move until she was nodding it up and down. Tears were still coming and her lips were still trembling, but she didn’t look that desperate or broken anymore, no. Sakura was slowly gathering her pieces, and he felt more relieved to see her like that. The pinkette took a deep breath, then, and he knew at that moment she had finally made up her mind.

“Probably something stupid.” Her voice came out, softly and unsure.

'Now that’s the Sakura I know.’

“I'm going back.” She continued, lowly at first, as if to taste the sound of her words as they were thrown into the universe. “Shannarou, I’m going back to that hellhole because that’s the only place in the middle of this mess that makes me feel slightly better with myself. I’m going back because that’s my job.” Her voice came out with all the confidence he knew she would be able to muster that night, and he figured that was their small victory of the day. She didn’t look that scared anymore, and perhaps, she was getting ready to move on for the night.

“Tch, there’s something definitely wrong with you, Sakura.”

“Yeah…I guess there is.” She said, softly, wiping the last tears that were falling from her eyes. “I guess not even a pandemic will keep me from working too much.”

“You're probably right, but…” He offered her a comforting smile, looking away from the webcam for a second before returning his attention back to her eyes. “I'm proud of you.”

Judging by the way her emerald eyes widened, it was possible to say his words caught her by surprise. Apparently, tears started to pool around her eyes once more, but she stopped them before they could fall. Her lips slightly curled up at that, as in a shy reaction, and even if he normally wouldn’t have said that, well, he figured she was in need of those words.

“Thank you, Sasuke-kun. I don’t know what would’ve happened if it wasn’t for you.”

“Hn, that’s easy, you would’ve been stubborn like always. And though I’m sure you would’ve figured out what to do on your own, it might have taken you a little longer to reach that conclusion.”

“Maybe you’re right.” She started, tugging a strand of her pink hair behind her ear. “Damn it, maybe I really do need to start listening to you.”

“Better late than ever.”

Better late than ever, indeed. Slowly, she was coming to her senses and he knew there was nothing left for him to do. From that moment on, it was up to her, and more than anyone, he knew she would pull through it.

“Yeah…”

“Oh, and now that you’ve mentioned it, have you eaten anything already?”

“I guess not.” She bit her lip, her demeanor clearly showing she hadn’t even considered that until that moment.

“Tch, you’re worse than Naruto. Go eat something, will you? You need to refill your energies."

“Fine.” Sakura said, taking her laptop in hands as she started walking down her hallway and towards the kitchen.

“Do I want to know when was the last time you ate?”

“Probably not.”

“Tch.”

She placed the device on her kitchen island and turned around to open her cabinet to grab a pan. “Come on, you’re the chef here…What can I do that is easy and good enough for your standards?”

At that moment, though he knew she was clearly teasing him, the Uchiha couldn’t help but remember the Dobe’s words earlier that day. And though he would normally not care about those things, he figured he could make an exception. It had been a rough night, after all.

“Do you have instant ramen?”

“Instant ramen?” She asked, confused. “Are you really suggesting that?”

“Aah.” He nodded, as if that was the most normal thing in the world. “I'm getting hungry, too and I think there’s still one bowl left. What do you say?”

Her face was a bit surprised, at first, but eventually, her expression changed and a soft, grateful smile took over her lips. In a swift move, she put back the pan and got herself a bowl of instant ramen. “Instant ramen it is, then.”

“Hn, I’ll go get one for me, too.”

“Okay…” She began, and he watched as she started to prepare the noodles. He was making his way to the kitchen with his laptop in hands, and it didn’t take much before they were both waiting for the water to boil. “Now we just wait, right?”

“I guess…Naruto is the expert here.”

“He certainly is.” She agreed, resting her chin on the palm of her hand. Her eyes were half closed, her head tilting a bit to the side. “Sasuke-kun…?”

“Uh? What is it?”

“I know it’s late and you must be tired, but…Can you talk to me for a bit longer? Just tell me about your day, I don't know.”

Her voice was soft at that moment, and he noticed the way she was genuinely curious about his day. Though she was still far from normal, Sasuke figured that was the closest to normal she would get in a situation like that. For the first time during the quarantine, he saw her, not as a doctor working bravely on the front lines, but as a young woman who had the right to feel insecure and scared.

They were all scared, after all. Why couldn’t she be, too, right? Just like everyone else, Sakura had the right to feel everything, and sometimes, feeling came with an overwhelming price. It hurt, it made her cry and doubt herself, but mostly, it made grow. As a woman and as a doctor, Haruno Sakura was growing and blooming like the flower she is.

For the better or the worse, that was how things were now.

And no matter what the future had in stock, they were going to face it together. Even if they were separated because of the virus, their hearts would be connected, always.

“Of course.”

“Good.” She smiled, weakly, and at that moment, they knew that, in the middle of that mess, they could finally allow themselves to enjoy some good, instant ramen for dinner.

––––––

a/n: Okay, so… was it too much? From the beginning, I had this angst prepared for this story, and believe it or not, most of Sakura’s lines were based on real conversations shared by doctors. The note, too, was very real. It happened to a health worker here in my country and it just broke my heart when she told that to the press. Times are really weird right now, and it’s ok to be scared, but we can’t turn against each other! We need to spread love and empathy, not the other way around. If you need anyone to talk to, I’m always here! I’m a bit of a mess and I take a long time to answer, but believe me, I AM HERE! Anyway, thanks for reading it! Hope you’ve enjoyed it! Stay safe and stay inside!

#sasusaku #sasusaku fanfiction #sasusaku fanfic #ssfanfic #Naruto fanfiction #myssfics

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xpialidoxy · 4 years ago

Text

No longer mine (Bruce Banner Imagine)

Bruce walked with Tony side by side. Tony had his check up in the hospital today so Bruce went out with him. Just when they were about to leave the hospital, Tony spotted you.

"Hey Y/N!"

Bruce's looked into the direction where Tony was looking at and there, he saw you.

There it was, that familiar glow of the room when you're in it. Just like before, you were shining.

You seemed a bit surprised to see them but you quickly changed that shocked expression into a happy one. You jogged to them and flashed them a huge smile. "hey!"

"Wow! It's really you! How long has it been??" Tony said, obviously so happy.

"Three years I think?" You offered a hug to Tony and the same with Bruce. "I didn't expect to bump into you two here."

Bruce was taken aback. He was so surprised to see you here. After 3 years, you two have finally crossed paths. You look the same, but no matter how much he looks at your pictures before, they were nothing in compared to seeing you right now.

Bruce watched as your eyes fell on him, making him hold his breath. "Hi Bruce, how are you?"

Tony and Bruce were both surprised to see you acting cool about it. Like nothing has happened.

"Great." Was the only thing that Bruce can say.

Tony decided to save his science bro and decided to take your attention instead. "Why are you in the hospital?"

You shifted your gaze from Bruce to Tony, smiling once again. "I—"

Suddenly, your phone rang and you quickly answered it. "Yes! I'm on my way there." You looked at the two of them with sorry filled eyes. "Sorry but I really need to go."

The science bros nodded. "Sure, go ahead."

"I'll drop by the tower one of these days, I have something to tell you guys." You simply said before you went running away.

Bruce was left speechless, watching as you disappeared into the crowd. Tony just watched his friend who missed you so much for those three years.

"You know, it's been 3 years and I still don't get why you broke up with her." When Tony said that, Bruce was reminded of that night.

"I'm sorry Y/N, but I don't love you anymore." He still remembers saying those hurtful things.

That night when he finished everything between the two of you. That night when you cried in front of him, begging him to take back the things he said.

The only night that you weren't shining, and it was all because of him.

"Clearly, you're still in love with her. So why don't you run after her and tell her you were wrong. That she really was the one for you?" And with that, Bruce glared at Tony and started walking away.

Bruce was busy tinkering with his new upgrade for the hulk buster a while ago, but now he's just staring into space.

Seeing you at the hospital today made him remember all of his memories of you.

The night when you first danced together in one of Tony's parties. Where you two first kissed.

The night where you two walked in the streets, your fingers locked with his, the moon and stars shined on both you and him.

The mornings where you wake him up by giving him a gentle kiss on his cheeks.

Even remembering your favorite movie made his heart ache.

But these thoughts disappeared when an annoying Tony Stark came rushing into the lab.

"BANNER!" Bruce jumped in surprise and his eyes tinged green. Tony stepped back when he saw this. "Oh no. No! No! Don't hulk out! I have news!"

Bruce tried to calm himself down as he looked at his monitor wherein Tony placed an article about some doctor, an anesthesiologist. But what caught Bruce's attention was your name and your picture standing side by side with the doctor.

World-renowned Anesthesiologist is Getting Married

Bruce took his glasses to read the article.

"That's why we bumped into her in that hospital." Tony commented. "Her..." he contemplated before talking again because he was a bit uncomfortable to say the next words. "Her fiancé works there. It looks like they've been together for two years. They worked together in another hospital.

Two years. She's moved on from me for two years. He couldn't help but think. It's been three years and he's still in love with you.

"What's interesting is that, that anesthesiologist suffers from a rare disease and it's very rare for patients to live for more than 25 years. But look at him! He's even a doctor and a world renowned one at that!" Tony can't stop his rambling.

Bruce scrolled the article as he saw pictures of you and the guy laughing and staring at each other. You looked genuinely happy... and in love.

His heart was beating so fast, he didn't even know why it was beating so fast.

The day went on in the tower, and now, it's finally time to eat dinner. Clint was the last one to join them, he was running when he came in.

"Guys! Have you heard the news?" He said as he hurriedly went to Tony. " Y/N's getting married to a world-renowned anesthesiologist! Their love story is all over the internet!"

"Really?" Tony stood up, not being able to read the whole story yet, he took Clint's phone.

"Yes, apparently, the doctor fell in love with Y/N at first but never tried to make any move. It was Y/N who initiated it and the doctor rejected her twice."

Steve opened his mouth, eyes on Bruce who stopped eating, "uhh... guys... can you not talk abou—"

"TWICE?!" Tony shouted upon reading it. "Because the doctor didn't want her to get hurt if something happens to him." He reads on. Thor stood from his seat and went to the two guys to read the article too.

Bruce gulped and placed his spoon and fork down.

"They look so in love, don't they?" Clint said once more.

"I agree." - Thor

"He stares at her as if—" Clint was about to say once more but Natasha cut him off.

"Clint, it might be better for you to sit and eat."

And with that, Clint lifted his gaze from his phone, Nat jerked her head to Bruce's direction whose eyes were now focused on his plate.

Clint looked to the doctor and immediately realized that Bruce joined them for dinner tonight, which was very rare because he mostly spends his whole night in the lab, his eyes widened and he cleared his throat.

"Uhm." He exhaled. "...right," slowly making his way to his seat.

The whole room went quiet, and Bruce was aware that they were expecting him to say something. He was aware that everyone was looking at him.

Bruce gulped and decided to stand from his chair. "Good for her." He said softly then began to leave the dining room.

Bruce went to his room and let himself fall to his bed. He buried his face in his pillows as he tried to get those thoughts out of his mind, but it wouldn't work. He unconsciously reached for his drawer and took a velvet box out of it. He opened the box and stared at the ring.

A ring that he was supposed to give you before.

4 years ago...

He bought the ring yesterday, and now he went to your home to get your father's blessing. He was so excited to marry you.

But, unlike his expectations, your father wasn't very happy about the idea. Instead of giving his blessing, he even pleaded Bruce to let you go.

"I want a normal life for my daughter." He pleaded. "She's suffered enough when she lost her mom, I don't want her to suffer anymore."

Bruce closed his eyes and threw the box.

The next day, everyone were silent while having breakfast. Clint still looked sorry after what he did last night, and Tony had this look in his face as if he's contemplating.

He finally gave in and sighed. "Guys... uhh.." his eyes linger on Bruce for a brief second. " Y/N's going to drop by tonight."

Everyone's head shot up and looked at Tony. Nat raised her eyebrows on him.

"She said she has something to give us.. uhm.. I was wondering if we could ask her to have dinner with us? I don't want to send her off just like that, it's been three years since we last met her."

"Tony." Nat warned, knowing how this affects Bruce.

Clint sighed and stared at Bruce. "I agree.. I don't think it's a good idea."

Tony looked at Thor. "but I miss Lady Y/N."

Tony looked to Steve who just stared at Bruce.

"Sure, why not?" The scientist said, faking a smile. A smile that didn't reach his eyes.

Their faces changed. "What?"

"It's been three years. And I do agree that we can't just send her off just like that. She's..." Bruce stopped for a moment. "She's Y/N, not just anyone. She's friends with everyone here."

"Right, I was about to say that." Clint said cheerfully. "I agree," looking so excited, his smile might rip his face.

"Alright! I'll tell her." Tony said and took out his phone, looking happy.

Nat and Captain on the other hand looked at Bruce worriedly, and Thor... Thor just continued on eating, seemingly happy upon hearing what Bruce just said.

So that's how you ended up here, in front of him, inside the tower, flashing everyone with a friendly smile.

Clint hurriedly pulled you for a hug. " Y/N! I missed you!"

You chuckled to your best and hugged him back. "I missed you too, Legolas."

Tony grinned and offered a hug. "and that's why I missed you."

"Missed you guys too."

Finally, your eyes set on Bruce and it was as if he was brought back to three years ago, when you two were still together.

"Hi Bruce," you said, offering a hug. Bruce gulped and hesitantly accepted the hug. Wondering how something that used to be so familiar to him felt so distant.

Tony and Clint stared at each other with wide eyes.

"It's been a while, have you been well?" You asked more, in which Bruce nodded.

You were still shining in his eyes; it seems like you were able to lit up the whole tower. For years, he felt like the tower seemed darker but now that you're here, it's no longer dark.

"Yes," He managed to answer, he brushed his hand to his hair. "I see you've been well too?"

"Thankfully."

Bruce bit his lip and slowly nodded, eyes still examining you. "That's good."

You both stood there, staring at each other but with different expressions on your faces. You look genuinely happy while Bruce looked like longing for you. And everyone except you knew this. How sad Bruce's eyes looked, he looked like he has something more to say than what he said.

They were right, he did have so much more to say. He wanted to ask you how everything ended up like this. But he already knew the answer to that, he knew it was his fault. He was the foolish one. For pushing you away, for hurting you so much that you will never think of coming back again, but still wanting to have you in his arms again.

Clint knew that he needed to get everyone's attention, because you two have been staring at each other for a while now.

"Sooo," he said loudly, getting everyone's attention. "Did you come alone?"

"Oh right," You said. "I told Yohan I'll drop by, he said he'll try to drop by too after he finished work."

Yohan

You said his name sweetly, you even giggled. "I don't think he'll be able to make it though, he has so many things to do."

"That's understandable, he's a world-renowned anesthesiologist." Tony said.

You giggled once again. "Please stop saying that, he hates it."

You imagine Yohan's face whenever you call him that, it makes him uncomfortable and slightly cringe. He would glare at you like a child or playfully attack you to stop you from calling him that.

Your imagination was not a secret to everyone, as they watch how you giggled to yourself, they realized you've been thinking about the doctor.

And Bruce couldn't help but to feel a sting in his heart, watching how you were so happy.

"Oh! Here are your invitations." You opened your bag and took out your wedding invitations and gave it to everyone.

Bruce stared at the card in his hand, staring at your picture and your husband-to-be.

"He's really busy these days so I don't think he'll make it to dinner."

"That's what you're going to tell them?" A voice said, making you all turn around.

There, you saw your fiancé standing with his hands in his pocket.

"Yohan!" He was wearing your favorite black t-shirt of him that makes him look so good. You ran to him and he stared at you with joy in his eyes. "I didn't think you'd make it."

He smiled boyishly and ruffled your hair. "I wouldn't miss a chance to meet your friends. Besides, it's not like you're the only one getting married here." He whispered to you.

You smiled at him, you can't help but feel your heart flutter in his words. He took your hand in his.

"So, are you going to introduce me to them or not?" He added when you just stood there, staring at him.

"Right! Sorry." You remembered, making him chuckled. You pulled him by your hand that was holding his own.

"Guys, this is Yohan, my fiancé. Yohan, they're the avengers."

Yohan extended his hand to everyone. "Nice to meet you."

"Tony Stark." Tony said, shaking Yohan's hand.

"Clint Barton."

"Thor,"

"Steve Rogers,"

"Natasha."

And at last, Yohan's gaze fell to the other doctor.

You bit your lip, being reminded of the times when Yohan would playfully tell you he's jealous with your ex.

"Nice to meet you Dr. Banner." Yohan said with a huge smile in his face.

"Nice to meet you too."

After they shook hands with each other, Yohan returned to your side, hand resting on your back.

"Let's go have some dinner." Tony said.

All throughout the dinner, you two were asked by the group. Laughing and joking with each other, they seem to like your fiancé, and the feelings were mutual.

All throughout the dinner, Bruce watched how Yohan stared at you. He always had a smile on his face whenever he looks at you, and he smiles even bigger when he hears your voice.

When the dinner was over, Tony, Clint and Thor snatched you away from your fiancé while captain and Nat left to meet Fury.

Bruce was left to clean up. "You should probably head upstairs, I bet Tony took her to show off his new suits."

Yohan stood up. "No, I'll help you."

The scientist smiled a little, trying so hard to send him away. "You're our guest, you sho—"

But before he can even finish what he was saying, Yohan already started cleaning the table. "It's okay, really."

Bruce just nodded and whispered. "Okay,"

It was awkward, they both know it. They became busy with what they were doing and there was a long silence between the two of them.

"I understand why you did it." Yohan said, getting Bruce's attention.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Her father talked to me too. He begged me to do the same thing." While saying this, Yohan looked at Bruce, who was shocked with what he heard.

"To tell you the truth, I almost did the same thing. But I talked to her about it," Bruce was now staring at the other doctor, who smiled when he was reminded of that time. "She had the right to know, it was our relationship and I don't get to decide by myself."

He chuckled. "She told me she's willing to fight it with me rather than avoid it. Y/N's so much stronger that what you think, Dr. Banner."

"Just like you, I'm scared of what may happen in the future, I'm scared she'll only get hurt. But... I'm more scared of losing her." Yohan sighed. "So, I decided that as much as I can... I'll make her happy."

Bruce smiled upon hearing that. Realizing how he's so much better than him.

"Hey! Yohan you stop that!" Tony yelled, taking the plates away from Yohan.

"You're our guest." Clint agreed.

The four have returned, ending the conversation between the two doctors.

When you had enough time to check on your friends, you finally decided to leave. Reminding everyone that they should come to your wedding.

Bruce watched as you left hand in hand with Yohan, nearly collapsing to the man while saying how tired you are. Your fiancé just laughed at you and held you close to him.

"You know my loyalty to you, Bruce. I wanted to hate him but I can't. He's too kind and funny and good-looking." Tony said to Bruce.

The day of your wedding came, Bruce hesitated to go. He can't attend it, he can't watch you getting married to someone else... but he ended up doing so. Now, he was at your wedding's reception. A slow song played while he was standing at the center of the room.

Across the room, you watch him. Then, you felt someone holding your hand. "Dance with him." Your fiancé's familiar voice said and you looked behind you, smiling at him.

"What? No." you chuckled. He shook his head and held your hand.

"He's been a big part of your life, Y/N. And I understand that. At least dance with him for the last time?" You stared at him and your heart swelled, you were really lucky to have met him. You stood on your tip toes and hugged him.

"I love you, I really do. So much." You told him.

He rubbed his hand on your back, hugging you tight. "I know you do, and I love you too. I know you still have some things to tell him, so go on."

When you two pulled back from the hug, you slowly approached Bruce. The man whom you used to love so much. You tap his shoulder with your fingers and he turned around, looking so surprised to see you standing in front of him.

You can't help but smile at his reaction.

"May I have this dance?"

"Can I have this dance?" That's what you asked him when you two first danced together.

Bruce felt the same thing he felt that night. The excitement and the happiness.

You watched as he sighed to himself and bit his lip, his eyes turned soft while staring at you, before saying. "Sure."

"Sure." He answered you that night, and the rest was history.

Well tonight, it really is just a history. A history of what you two, buried under memories.

Slowly, you two started to dance to the song. Tony and the others spotted this and watched across the room.

"Congratulations." Bruce said while looking at your eyes. He was smiling but it didn't reach his eyes, he was slowly realizing that this isn't the same as your first dance. For this time, this time might be his last dance with you.

"Thank you. Thank you for coming, I really appreciate it." Bruce nodded at you and you two stared at each other for a long time.

"I'm sorry." Bruce said all of a sudden. "I'm sorry for telling you those hurtful words before. I don't know if it will change anything but I want you to know that I didn't mean any of it."

You nodded at him. "I know." You sighed. "I realized why you did that, apparently, my dad asked Yohan to do the same thing."

"It all went wrong when I did that. I've always regret making that decision."

"You should've talked to me about it, instead of deciding what you think is best for the two of us. You didn't even give me a chance to decide and to fight for our relationship." You finally get if off your chest, that's what you've been wanting to say. "I wished you believed in me, even for just a little. I could've handled it. That's what a relationship is all about."

Bruce suddenly felt his tears threatening to fall, but he didn't want you to see him crying. He didn't want to make you feel bad, especially in this special day. "Can I hug you for the last time?"

You couldn't help but to feel your heart sting when you heard the sadness in his voice. So, you nodded. "Of course."

Right after you said that, he hugged you. Tightly. His tears started falling but he remained calm. You two danced like that.

"You know I loved you right? So much. And I still do." He said, whispering those words with his mouth on your head.

You nodded and hugged him back. "I know. And I loved you. So much. I never thought I'll ever love someone just as much as I loved you."

You rubbed small circles on his back. "But Yohan made me realize that I can. I love him so much Bruce, I don't think I can ever live without him. He believes in me more than I believe in myself."

"I can see that. I know how much he loves you, it's written all over his face." Bruce said making the two of them chuckle. "I'm really happy for you."

"You'll meet someone else who will make you realize that you can love again. Someone who might not be able to take the pain away, but someone who's willing to be in pain with you. Because that's what love is, Bruce. Understanding a person's pain is understanding that person."

"I don't know... I don't think I can love someone as much as I loved you."

Hearing that, you pulled away from the hug to look at him face to face. You held his hand using your left hand, and held his cheek by your right hand. "Trust me, you will."

Bruce nodded at you as he looked behind you, "let's bring you back to your husband." And he smiled. This time, his smile reached his eyes. He took your left hand with him and drag you towards Yohan.

"Thank you for taking care of her. Please be happy for the rest of your lives."

Yohan stared back at Bruce. "We will. Thank you for taking care of her too."

Bruce stared at your hand that he was holding. He breathed in deeply before finally giving your hand to your husband.

He's letting you go. For real.

And when he let go of your hand, he smiled at you and your husband. Before leaving the two of you to share your dance.

Bruce watched as the people cheered when you two danced. You buried your face to your husband's chest and you were crying while holding tightly to him.

At that moment, you two were shining. As if you two were really meant to be together.

Bruce glanced for the last time, before he turned his back and started to leave the room.

For three years he still has this lingering feeling, hoping that maybe he'll meet you again, and maybe you two can start again. For three years he still thinks that you're still his.

But today, today he puts an end on it as he thought.

"You're no longer mine."

Your somebody else's now.

#bruce banner #bruce banner x reader #brucexreader #bruce x reader #hulk

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ymiwritesstuff · 5 years ago

Note

Okay, I have a request for Kakyoin this time. Could you do one where he's just become a vampire and is trying to keep away from the female reader as he's scared of hurting her but she comforts him? Thank you, you're work is amazing!

Vampire Kakyoin is one of my favorite things ever and I was happy to receive a request for him! Thanks for the request once again, thanks for the extremely kind words and I hope you enjoy!

Isolation

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Part 3: Stardust Crusaders

Noriaki Kakyoin x Reader

Summary: To some, gaining immortality instead of dying a painful death was too good to be true. But for Kakyoin, it was far worse.

Notes: Small angst?? Fluff

Kakyoin had always thought that defeating Dio would make everything great again, thinking that once the blond vampire would cease to exist, all evil and negativity in his life would disappear with him. He would be able to enjoy life with his beloved, perhaps even watch his own children grow up if you so desired. Everything would be perfect and no one he loved would be in any danger.

However that was not the case at all as to him, someone he loved was in grave danger whenever he was around you.

Kakyoin knew that he had a very high chance of losing his life when he was about to challenge Dio directly. It was necessary in order to gain knowledge about his stand and he should’ve been grateful for having survived such an attack. But nowadays he couldn’t help but to wonder if it was for the better if he had never survived The World’s blow. He found it ironic that the blood of someone who tried to kill him would be the thing that ultimately allowed him to still exist in this world. However Kakyoin would soon come to realize just now difficult being an immortal vampire really was.

The moment he woke up in the hospital, he immediately noticed a change. His fresh fangs lightly grazed his bottom lip, his skin was cold as ice and no signs of Dio’s attack were apparent on his abdomen. Kakyoin didn’t know how to react to his new form. He felt a massive amount of power flowing through his veins, enhancing his physical strength beyond that of any human. The tiny wound on his lips due to his fangs was cured within seconds and when he went to open the blinds of his window he received a cruel reminder of his weakness. He would never be able to enjoy the warmth of the sun.

But the thing that was far more terrifying for Kakyoin wasn’t his new unknown abilities or even the deadly orb in the sky. The most terrifying thing of all was the fact that Kakyoin was dangerous. Dangerous to the point where he thought of himself as someone who would hurt or even kill the one he loved. Kakyoin was afraid to be around you. What if he suddenly lost control and drained you from the essential red liquid flowing through your body? What if he unintentionally hurt you due to his superhuman strength?

All these questions ran wild in his head, causing him to isolate himself from everyone. He would stay home, sleep during the day and spend the nights with himself, trying to return back to a normal life. Kakyoin couldn’t refuse your occasional pleas to go out with him, but he was far too afraid to allow himself to be alone with you. This caused your dates under the darkness of the night to be rather awkward as there would always be a third or fourth individual with you, often being someone from the crusaders. But even when you thought you would have some private time with your boyfriend at his home, he always denied your entrance. Kakyoin knew you didn’t like it, but he had to think about your safety above all. You were extremely saddened by his behavior, but understood what he was going through. Becoming an immortal being wasn’t exactly easy, but you only wished to help, not wanting Kakyoin to endure everything alone.

The knock on his apartment door snapped the red haired male out of his thoughts, his lavender eyes quickly moving towards the sound. He wasn’t used to visitors so after standing up, he carefully made his way to the door, peaking through the peephole. His eyes widened as soon as he noticed a feminine form, the (H/C) hair and (E/C) eyes he knew too well. You wore a worried expression on your face as you patiently waited for him to open the door. Kakyoin was also worried, but not for the same reason. What worried him was the fact that you were at his apartment door, alone. He wanted to ignore your knocks in an attempt to make it seem like he wasn’t home, but upon hearing your voice from the other side, his insides twisted with anxiety.

“Nori? Are you there? Please open the door, I need to talk to you” Kakyoin had his back against the door, his head spinning. Should he let you in and risk your life? But how was he ever going to face you again if he was a prisoner in his own home? He looked through the peephole again. You hadn’t moved, your expression hadn’t changed as it had the same pain. With a sigh you began to retreat from the door, thinking that he either wasn’t home or didn’t want to be disturbed.

Kakyoin subconsciously opened the door before you could get far, keeping the door chain intact just in case. His eyes fell on yours, his hands trembling. “You shouldn’t be here”, he said with a voice so quiet you barely heard it yourself. “Nori, please.. I want to talk to you..” Your words make him avert his gaze from you in uncertainty. He knows he should just slam the door shut and stop himself from hurting you. However that would only save you from the physical pain as his refusal would undoubtedly also inflict pain upon you.

With a sigh he closes the door enough so he can release the chain in order to let you in. You smile in relief as you step in, observing him as you do. His crimson hair is a mess, his eyes lack their usual spark, that spark seemingly replaced by uneasiness. This anxiety radiating from him causes you to approach him, attempting to touch his face in a soothing manner. Kakyoin however swiftly denies your quiet request by taking your hand in his cold one and placing it down. “Don’t.. You’ll get hurt..” The last bit of his sentence is almost mute, but your ears catch it, causing you to frown your brows in both confusion and concern. “What do you mean? Nori, what’s wrong?” Your words of worry dig into his soul, stabbing him in the most vulnerable places. He’s unable to contain his fears within so he sighs and looks at you with eyes filled with sorrow

“I’m dangerous (Name). You could get hurt at any time. I don’t...” He struggles to find the right words almost as much as he struggles looking at your eyes. “I don’t know if I’m able to control myself. My powers..” He looks at his trembling hands with long nails that could easily end any living creature’s life. He hated how much this hurt him. He didn’t lose his life on that fateful day, but it had cost him his humanity, his confidence in himself and quite literally his ability to embrace you into a warm embrace full of love.

“Nori, you know that’s not true” Your words cause him to finally lock his eyes on you. The expression you hold is serious yet determined. “You would never hurt me, right?” Your question is rhetorical as you know his answer already. You carefully take his icy hand in yours which he thankfully doesn’t reject. Even if his hand lacks the previous warmth, it’s still his hand that you want to be lovingly touched and embraced by. “You’re not dangerous, Nori. I understand how difficult it is. I can only imagine what you’re going through” He listens to you carefully, squeezing your hand. Your gaze quickly falls on his lavender eyes once more. “But that’s why I want to help you. Please Nori, don’t shut yourself away from people.. From me..”

Kakyoin felt your hands wrap around him. His first instinct was to pull away, but he didn’t. He couldn’t possibly deny a loving embrace from you. You were right, he had to let people in or he would never learn to live with his vampirism. Only now was he starting to realize just how much he truly needed you. He returned the embrace by wrapping his arms around you, kissing the top of your head. “I know (Name).. I’m sorry” You shake your head against his chest.

“Don’t be. I understand. Just please.. Allow me to help. You’re not alone.. You don’t have to be”

This was the moment of realization for Kakyoin. He realized that this was what he was expecting after Dio’s defeat. You, his beloved by his side and not only him and his curse. He was a fool to think that he could isolate himself from you. Because you always made your way into his heart, even though he no longer actually possessed one. No matter what he was, you would never leave him or feel threatened while with him. He was the most caring, loving and kind person you had ever met and that would never change. You were the reason Kakyoin could be thankful to be alive.

#jjba #jjba x reader #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #jojo #jojo's bizarre adventure x reader #jojo part 3 #Noriaki Kakyoin #noriaki kakyoin x reader #fluff #angst #kakyoin #kakyoin x reader #reader insert #Jojo no Kimyou na Bouken #jojo stardust crusaders #jojo's bizarre adventure stardust crusaders

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luci-in-trenchcoats · 5 years ago

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The Girl Next Door (Part 3) - Bonfires

Summary: Sam gets a new nurse to help out Dean during the day and the boys learn some news about the reader’s past...

The Girl Next Door Masterlist

Pairing: Neighbor/Mechanic!Dean x baker!reader

Word Count: 3,000ish

Warnings: language, medical emergency

A/N: Parts of this series are told from two different POV’s. Dean’s POV are written from limited third person. Reader’s POV are second person (like a typical reader insert). Enjoy!…

Dean’s POV

“Uncle Dean,” asked Avy at breakfast, swinging her legs under the kitchen table, Sam munching on some eggs at the other end. “Do I have to go back to school?”

“What? You love school. You’re a nerd like your daddy,” said Dean, pecking her cheek. “A very nice nurse is going to come and stay with your daddy for a few hours while I take you to school and go to work for a little while. Then we’ll come pick you up together. Besides, you only got like two days left this year. Don’t you want to see your friends?”

“Are you sure daddy will be okay?” she asked.

“Sweetie,” said Dean, crouching down next to her chair. “I wouldn’t leave your daddy home unless I knew he was in good hands. The nurse will take care of him for us while we’re both gone, hm?”

“Okay,” she said.

“Go pack up your backpack for me, sweetie,” said Dean. She took off, Sam scowling from the other end of the table. “Don’t be grumps. I bet it’ll be some hot chick.”

“Yeah, right,” mumbled Sam. “Maybe I can go hang out with Y/N, watch her bake at least.”

“Hey, you get TV back real soon and before you know it, you’re going to know the names of all those desperate housewives,” said Dean.

“Kill me,” groaned Sam. The doorbell rang and he groaned again, Dean flicking his arm as he hauled him to his feet. Dean let him walk himself, his legs pretty steady again thankfully. Dean held out an arm just in case though as Sam opened the door.

“Hi! I’m Eileen. You must be Sam,” she said, holding out a hand.

“What gave it away?” said Sam with a chuckle.

“My friend said you’d be tall and handsome,” she said. Sam turned and gave Dean a shit eating grin that Dean rolled his eyes at but made his heart extremely happy. “Which must make you Dean.”

“Nice to meet you. So I got everything in the kitchen as far as his medicine goes and notes and everything and-”

“Alright. Let’s have Sam sit down and us three can chat quick before you gotta scoot out of here,” she said.

Ten minutes later Dean was chuckling as he and Avy climbed into Baby.

“Uncle Dean, what’s so funny?” she asked from the backseat.

“Your daddy’s got a crush on his nurse, Avy,” said Dean. “I guarantee it.”

“She’s from Ireland too! Isn’t that cool?” said Sam, still going on and on about Eileen when Dean came home from work around lunchtime. Dean hadn’t heard Sam go off about a girl like that apart from Jess back in the day. “Oh and she met Y/N in college. They were roommates. Y/N was going to be a doctor, can you believe that?”

“Yeah, I can. She runs her own successful business out of her kitchen so I can believe it,” said Dean. “Was Eileen going for that too?”

“Yeah, they both were. There was this bad pile up that came in one night during their first rotation in med school last year, like sixteen cars, over forty people. It was horrible apparently. Y/N dropped the next day, just left school completely. Eileen didn’t hear from her until a few months ago when she moved to town apparently,” said Sam. “Eileen decided she didn’t want to work in a hospital either after that.”

“Y/N must have too,” said Dean.

“Yeah. Plus Y/N’s got good cookies,” said Sam. Dean rested his head against his elbow, listening to Sam talk about his four and a half hours he spent with Eileen, a smile spreading onto his face. “What? I realize I’m a bald freak. You don’t need to laugh.”

“You like this girl,” said Dean, Sam shrugging. “Sammy.”

“I like her,” said Sam. “But she’s my nurse.”

“So? She’s cute, she looks like she’s into you too. I don’t think she checks out all her brain trauma patient’s asses on her way out either,” said Dean.

“Alright. Speaking of girls,” said Sam, cocking his head. “You and Y/N are getting a bit flirty flirt over there.”

“I have a date with her on Saturday,” said Dean as he shrugged.

“That’s great, Dean,” said Sam. “You excited?”

“Scared,” said Dean, Sam resting his head on the cushion, giving Dean puppy dog eyes. “I like this girl, Sam. I mean, I like her and I don’t know a whole lot about her even. She feels nice is all.”

“That other stuff is detail,” said Sam.

“I’m not good at relationships,” said Dean, picking it a stray thread on a pillow.

“Dean,” said Sam, forcing Dean’s gaze back on him. “Give it a chance. Not every relationship ends badly.”

“Mine do,” mumbled Dean.

“You used to have hook ups from bars when you were feeling down and the girls you did actually like and have relationships with, they didn’t care about you the same way. Y/N actually takes care of you, or at least reminds you to take care of yourself. I know that another human being caring for you is a foreign concept to you but let her do it and you do it back and that’s called being in a relationship,” said Sam.

“I haven’t even been on a date with her yet,” said Dean.

“I know. I’m just saying, don’t go in with a negative attitude,” said Sam. Dean held up his hands, earning an eye roll. “I mean it.”

“I got it, Sammy. I’ll be on my best behavior.”

The Next Evening: Reader’s POV

Summer was in full effect on the early June night. After standing in front of a pair of hot ovens all day, you were thankful for the slight chill in the air as you settled onto the front porch with a book. Avy gave you a wave as she ran around the yard, Dean scooping her up and throwing her over his shoulder. They headed into the backyard, your gaze going back to your story.

“Y/N,” you heard beside you. You jumped up like a rocket, Dean jumping down your front steps, laughing when you groaned. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to spook you. I didn’t realize you were that invested in your book there.”

“Oh, it’s fine. What’s up?” you asked. He shook his head, waving you off. You cocked your own back, Dean waving again. “Oh come on, you interrupted me after all, Winchester.”

“Enjoy your story, Y/N,” he said, heading back across the yard.

“Dean,” you said, leaning against the railing as you hopped to your feet, getting a shrug from him as he walked backwards. He had his hands in his pockets, biting his bottom lip as you caught a slight pink to his cheeks.

“Avy finished up first grade today. We’re having a little backyard bonfire with smores to celebrate. Figured no one ever makes you a treat if you wanted to join us,” he said. “If you want to hang out that is.”

“Who am I to turn down free food?” you said, Dean returning your smile. “I’ll be right over.”

You headed inside and grabbed a flannel, tucking your book away on the coffee table for another time. After locking up the house, you popped out the backdoor, walking across the shadowy yard to theirs, Dean getting a fire going while Sam popped a marshmallow in his mouth from a lawn chair nearby.

“Hey, Y/N,” he said with his mouth full, Avy doing the same and mimicking her father for a moment.

“Hey guys. I heard you finished first grade today, Avy,” you said, Dean smiling as he lit a match.

“Yeah. I only went back for like two days,” she said, swinging her legs when she plopped down in a lawn chair. “I missed the last two weeks.”

“Fall will be here before you know it and you’ll be begging to be outside playing again,” said Sam, ruffling her hair. “But now we got all the time in the world to hang out.”

“Don’t you have to work?” she asked.

“Sammy’s not going back to work for a while, kiddo. You guys got the whole summer to spend with me,” said Dean, backing away from the fire when it finally caught. “Now we got something going.”

“Y/N,” said Sam when Dean started to roast a few marshmallows, nodding to one of the empty chairs. You took a seat and threw on your flannel, Dean whistling while he showed Avy how to cook a few herself. “Thanks for mentioning Eileen to Dean the other day. She’s great. Eases his mind too.”

“It’s no problem. She was texting me earlier, yelling at me for not telling her how cute you are,” you teased.

“Seriously,” said Sam. You shrugged with a smile. “Like, legitimately?”

“Maybe. You gotta find out yourself, Sam,” you said, laughing to yourself.

“Girls,” he mumbled, gaze going back to the fire. You got a nudge in the ribs from him, Sam smiling as he fixed the beanie on his head.

“Y/N. How you want yours done? Extra crispy or…” Dean trailed off, his eyes going wide. You turned left and saw Sam get an unfocused look in his eye, hands on his head as he squeezed his lids shut.

“Guys,” he said, taking a deep breath.

“Avy, go sit on the back porch,” said Dean as he ditched the marshmallows in the fire and the bag in the grass. “Now.”

Your hands were on Sam, helping him to sit on the ground and safely away from the fire. Avy slowly went past and to the porch, frowning over at the three of you.

“What are-“ started Dean, watching you lay Sam down.

“Dean. Listen. Do these things in this order. Get me his anti-seizure medicine asap. Whatever the emergency one is. Put out the fire and call for an ambulance. Tell them your brother is having a seizure and he had brain surgery not long ago. Tell them his doctor’s names for them to contact. The light in the fire probably triggered it if I had to guess. Get Avy in the house so she doesn’t see him. Go,” you blurted out. You know you spoke probably far too quickly for him to get all of it, Dean staring for a long second.

He took off quickly after that though, Sam wincing at you as he tried to look around from where you’d lay him down on his side, facing away from everything.

“What-“

“Relax, Sam,” you said rubbing his arm. “Relax for me.”

“Here,” said Dean about fifteen seconds later, a bottle being chucked over to you from the porch. Sam tensed up though and you made sure his arm was under his head. The backyard got dark after a moment as Dean dumped water on the fire, Sam pretty much through it by the time Dean flicked on the porch light.

“There you go, Sam. You’re okay,” you said, Sam taking a few deep breaths when he stopped shaking. “You’re okay.”

“What,” mumbled.

“You had a little seizure, just a few seconds. You’re alright. An ambulance will be here real soon and we’ll get you taken care of,” you said as you rubbed his arm. “We’ll get you off the ground in just a second.”

“Avy,” he said as he tried to move, tilting his head around for her.

“She’s fine and in the house. She didn’t see anything,” you said, Dean nodding as he took a step off the porch, pulling his phone away from his ear.

“Good,” he breathed out, looking a little better. “Can I sit up?”

“Give it a minute,” you said, Dean wandering over cautiously. “Dean, you stay with Sam, okay? I’ll go wait out front with Avy.”

“What if it happens again?” he asked.

“What did the doctor’s tell you to do if it happened?” you said. Dean took a deep breath and nodded.

“This,” he said after a moment. “I got him.”

“Good. You two keep each other company, okay? I’ll watch Avy.”

“There he is Avy,” you said, holding her up on your hip as she held onto you, Sam and Dean coming around the back of the house about fifteen minutes later with the paramedics.

“Is this really necessary?” asked Sam from the stretcher, rolling his eye while they wheeled him to the driveway.

“Yes,” said everyone, Sam holding up his hands.

“Alright, we’ll meet you at the hospital,” said Dean, grabbing Avy from you while they packed up Sam. “You want to ride with us, Y/N?”

“Oh,” you said, rubbing the back of your head. “I don’t...I don’t think I should go.”

“Oh. Okay,” said Dean, giving you a half-smile. “Thank you for helping tonight.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you said with a nod. “We’ll take a raincheck on the smores.”

“Yeah, sounds good,” said Dean. He headed for his car and to put Avy inside, your eyes screwing shut.

“Wait,” you said, Dean spinning around with her. “She doesn’t need to spend half the night awake in a hospital,” you said quietly. “I can watch her if you guys are comfortable with that.”

“Avy, you want to have a sleepover with Y/N?” asked Sam from the back of the ambulance.

“Okay,” she said, Dean setting her down.

“Call me if you guys need anything,” he said. You nodded, Avy grabbing your hand. “You be good for Y/N, sweetie.”

“Can we still have smores?” she asked, looking up at you.

“Sure thing, sweetie. I’ll even teach you how to make them in the microwave,” you said, giving Dean a nod. “Go take care of Sam. I got this one.”

“Thanks, Y/N.”

“Sorry,” you heard Dean whisper, something warm being thrown over top of you. You cracked open an eye, Dean giving you a smile. You’d passed out on Sam’s couch after you put Avy to bed eventually. “They sent us home. Sammy’s all good. Like you said, little seizure. No fires in the backyard for him though for a while. Go on back to sleep.”

“I should go home,” you yawned, sitting up and rubbing your eyes, Dean moving some hair out of your face for you. “Sorry, about before. I don’t really like hospitals. I doubt Avy wanted to spend another night in one.”

“No need to apologize, that was a better idea anyways. I don’t like ‘em all that much either,” said Dean, your eyes heavy again. “Thank you for watching, Avy. Sammy won’t mind I said you could stay though. It’s too dark out for you to go walking home alone.”

“I live next door,” you giggled, scratching your head with a smile.

“Can I walk you then?” he asked quietly. You were too tired to argue and nodded, Dean pulling you to your feet, catching you when you almost tripped. “I don’t need two of you to be brain trauma patients around here now.”

“Flirt,” you said, lazily tossing on your shoes before you were out the front porch with him, Dean rubbing his bare arms in the cool night air. He stayed close as he walked you across the yards and to your front door, wearing a sleepy smile of his own when you looked at him. “Thank you for walking me home, Dean. You’re a gentleman.”

“Eh, you don’t got to thank people for doing what they’re supposed to,” he said. You leaned back against the door, Dean tilting his head as he leaned against one of the porch posts. “I shouldn’t have done the fire. I was stupid. I should have known.”

“It wasn’t an ordinary trigger, the flickering light. It was a small seizure. Sam’ll be okay,” you said. “There was no way you could have known. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”

“Doc said he’s not allowed any TV, any excessive reading for another two weeks now until his checkup...he’s going nuts,” said Dean. He pressed his palms to his face, taking a deep breath as he pulled them away. “He wants to force his head better faster and…”

“He and Avy are always free to come over during the day. I’ll be busy baking but it’s something at least,” you said. “I don’t mind the company.”

“Maybe I’ll mention it to Eileen in the morning,” he said, turning to go. “Thank you for taking charge tonight. I froze up.”

“No you didn’t. I was just quicker,” you said.

“You used to work in a hospital, didn’t you,” he said. You swallowed, knowing Eileen must have told them.

“Yeah,” you said quietly. “In a different life.”

“Y/N?” he said, stopping when he got to the bottom of your steps, glancing up at you. “The Winchesters haven’t had an easy few weeks. This is our problem. It’s not yours. If I’m overstepping…”

“You guys are my friends,” you said. “I like helping when I can. Really.”

“Good,” said Dean.

“Dean?” you said, turning to head inside, looking over your shoulder at him. “Thank you for walking me home.”

“S’no trouble at all,” he said, catching a smile in the dim light. “Goodnight, Y/N.”

“Goodnight, Dean.”

A/N: Read Part 4 here!

#spn #supernatural #dean x reader #dean winchester #series #dean series #spn fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #spn reader insert #supernatural reader insert #dean x #winchester #fluff #dean winchester x reader

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ververa · 5 years ago

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Asylum (3/?)

Part 2

So sorry it took me so long. Hope you like it.

Let me know what you think

Words: 2.478

Warning: mention of aversion theraphy and cold showers treatment

Ellie Staple x patient

After almost a month in the asylum there’s something inside you that breaks. You cannot really say what it is. But what you do know is that something bad is going on inside of you. It feels as if the joy, that used to fill you in those good and happy moments, stopped existing. It isn’t your mind that is suffering any more. It is your soul.

Your mind derails and your heart is in atrophy. You see no good. There is only devil all around you, even in your heart. There are no colours any more. Everything gets darker. The world that you used to know stops existing for you. All the familiar colours steadily vanish, until there is nothing more, but a black hole inside of you. You feel numb, as if you were somewhere outside your life. You’re young and free, but then you can feel none of it.

Your restless and unsettled mind is seeking any semblance of peace. Any way to distract and sedate yourself. Because everything is better than the constant fear and insecurity inside of you.

Ellie tried hard to get to the girl. She wanted to help her so badly. She needed her old Ronnie to come back. Though none of the ways of treatment she knew seemed to work. The psychiatrist couldn’t understand it all. She felt helpless. Why it didn’t work? Why their therapy sessions stopped being effective? What had he done to her precious girl? And why she’s not able to take it all back? There were so many questions and she didn’t know the answers.

Ellie was spending most of her time analysing that particular case. How could she not? Ronnie became someone far more than just a patient. It was neither just a fascination nor an attraction. It was love. The purest and the most real feeling that the psychiatrist had ever had for someone.

She found it where it wasn’t supposed to be – in front of her, with her patient. It might not be right, yet it felt that her heart was in a right place. With Ronnie she has moved further than she thought she could. It was different and felt good. For the first time the psychiatrist let herself lose control. She was ready to fall in deep, cross the line, break all the boundaries. Ronnie had her at “hello”. There were no doubts about it. But she knew they could make it right the moment she kissed the girl, when she pulled her so close that it felt as if they were a one body.

But then Dr Schulz came in their way. If she had know, she would have never let it happen. She would protect Ronnie and the girl wouldn’t have to go through all of it.

However, to Ellie’s dismay, she wasn’t able to turn back time. She was forced to watch how her dearest girl slowly fall apart and there was nothing she could do, no matter how hard she was trying.

The psychiatrist waited a long time, before she finally decided to read the files of Dr Schulz’s patients. She hoped that maybe thanks to that she would be able to figure out what exactly happened and how to fix it. However, she hadn’t expected to find out about such horrible things happening in her hospital.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Ronnie Zimmerman

Specimen is anorexic. Was brought here after a suicidal attempt. Is Dr Staple’s patient, but the woman is clearly not qualified enough to work on this case. It’s obvious they have established an unhealthy and unethical relationship. The specimen’s diary is the best proof for that.

All disabled specimens found her to be friendly and helpful. Though, that are only appearances. She is a manipulative creature seeking attention and trying to compensate for a bad relations she had with her family.

Specimen was aggressive during the procedure of searching rooms. There was a need to carry on the safety procedure. She got a double dose of sedative drugs. Was put in a straitjacket for obvious reasons. Seems to be bewildered and shocked.

Implementing the old and proven way of treatment seemed to be the only option in this case.

Specimen is startled and confused for most of the time. My diagnosis: the specimen is mentally unbalanced.

The last phase of treatment seemed to help. The specimen is more likely to agree her beliefs and the way in which she used to act are bad and not acceptable.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Aggressive. Bewildered. Shocked. Startled. Confused. Ellie couldn’t believe what she was reading. She couldn’t believe that all that was referring to her little girl. To the young woman she had known for quite some time. Ronnie had never been aggressive. Neither did she try to hurt anyone.

The psychiatrist put down the file and looked at it. She spent a while on just sitting and starring at the document, until she finally moved. She took a deep breath and torn the document to shreds before throwing it away. She then quickly stood up and left her office – heading to the room, in which they had locked Ronnie.

Staple was even more confused after reading Dr Schulz’s notes. The only thing that was clear for her was that the other doctor must have hurt her patient. She still couldn’t help feeling guilty. If she had stayed that would have never happened. But she hadn’t.

Ellie reached the room and saw a medical staff cleaning up.

“What are you doing?” she asked surprised

“We’re cleaning”

“I don’t remember asking you to do so”

“Dr Schulz told us...”

“Dr Schulz is not working at this hospital any more” she cut the man off “Leave it and go back to the ward”

“Of course”

Ellie waited for them to leave before she began to look over the room. She was trying to find something. Anything that she could have missed before. It took her over 30 minutes. And she found nothing. She was angry with herself and the situation itself. She wanted to scream or cry, but couldn’t. She knew she had to be strong for Ronnie.

The psychiatrist was slowly losing her hope. She was about to leave the room when a rubbish bag drew her attention. For someone else it would be just a garbage obviously, but not for Ellie. Her intuition was telling her something different. And she wasn’t wrong. The doctor opened the bag and found a couple empty bottles of apomorphine.

At first she couldn’t believe, she didn’t want to. But she did understand it’s something that Doctor Schulz would most likely do. And that’s when she realised what had happened. She was aware what the girl must have been through and finally after such a long time everything began to make sense.

Aversion therapy. He used it as a method of “treatment”. Could it be called like that? It was more like torturing patients, that was why professional psychologist weren’t using that method any more. Though the man seemed not to care about ethical code.

Ellie needed a moment. She sat down on the floor still looking at the small bottle she was holding. She was furious. Furious and sad at the same time. She wished she hadn’t let the other doctor just like that left the hospital. She should have strangled him or at least hit him, but she hadn’t.

“Calm down, Ellie. Calm the fuck down” she kept on repeating for a while “You need to take care of her. You need to help her...” she says standing up

______________________________

Ronnie was having troubles with sleep for quite some time. She either couldn’t sleep at all or was haunted by nightmares. She couldn’t take it any more. Every time she closed her eyes she saw that horrible face. She heard that awful laugh and felt the pain. It was as if she was experiencing it all again and again every night. She was done. She wasn’t able to bear it all, so she tried hard not to sleep at all, as the though of it was scaring her. But she didn’t tell Ellie. She couldn’t. She knew very well that the psychiatrist was worried enough without it and she didn’t want to make it all worse.

It was another night. It was quite late and everyone at the ward was asleep. Everyone apart from her. She was doing her best not to let her eyes close, because she knew what that meant. The struggle was hard. She hadn’t sleep since almost 4 days and felt worse and worse with each passing hour, but she was a fighter. She had been fighting against everyone and everything her whole life. Thought fighting with herself was so far the hardest thing to do.

Ronnie was sitting on her bed in the dark. She was weak and tired. Her eyes were so heavy… She didn’t know when, but they just closed and the hell started all over again.

They called it cold showers treatment, but for her it was just another part of the whole process of torture. She was crying and screaming. She was begging and apologising, but nothing worked. It always ended the same. With two male nurses dragging her to the separate bathroom, which Doctor Schulz was using for his therapy.

They were undressing her to the underwear and then strapping to the metal construction, so that she wouldn’t be able to move. Then it was time for Doctor Schulz’s speech. He was always saying how bad their behaviour was. That she would never be accepted and that Ellie didn’t love her. After that they turned on the water. Horribly cold water.

It’s an awful feeling, when first drops hit your warm body. At first you scrabble, but the belts are too strong to escape. You’re trapped and after a few times you know that, but you still keep on struggling until you don’t have any more energy. You’re too weak to move and the water is still falling. You have a weird feeling that it’s getting colder and colder with every minute. The time is dragging so slow that you think it’ll never end. Your body starts to change colour. It turns blue and some parts of your body began to hurt. When you’re about to faint they turn the water off. Nobody says anything, but you feel dizzy and hear some kind of ringing in your ears, even though there’s a

perfect silence in the room. You can’t even cry or move and they leave you like that for some time.

They kept her in the dark. Weak and unable to move. Ronnie’s limps felt frozen. She was trembling, but all that she felt was pain and fear. The combination that was paralysing her body even more.

The thought of death crossed her mind so many times, that she was sure she would be indeed dead by the time Ellie’s back. She was tired. She wanted to rest and didn’t want to go through it all again, but her eyes couldn’t close. The tears were springing into her eyes. She was slowly dying. The doctor was killing each part of her that was left from inside. It felt as if she was dwelling in suffering. She didn’t even know when the tears started to escape her eyes…

______________________________

“Shhh… Ronnie. It’s okay. I’m here. It’s only a nightmare”

The girl opened her eyes and instead of Doctor Schulz she saw Ellie. It was over. It was only another bad dream.

Ronnie looked at the other woman. She still was a bit confused, the tears were still falling down her cheeks, but Ellie was right next to her. She hugged the psychiatrist, hiding her face in Ellie’s hair. It used to be something normal, natural, but at that moment if felt weird. The therapy changed her. She was almost sure that the monster in a white overall killed all the love she had for Ellie and the though of it was even worse than everything that had happened to her.

“Shh. It’s okay” Ellie stroked her hair and embraced her carefully “We’re going to deal with it together. I found a way. I’ll fix it”

“You found a way?” Ronnie pulled away and looked at the woman

“Yes, baby. I did” the psychiatrist smiled and wanted to caress Ronnie’s cheek, but the girl flinched

The girl could see the hurt in Ellie’s brown eyes. She never meant to cause the psychiatrist any suffering. She didn’t want Ellie to cry because of her.

Staple nodded understandingly and placed her hand on the bed instead.

“Do you know what aversion therapy is?” she asked calmly

“N-no…”

“It’s a method of treating habits or types of behaviour that are not wanted, acceptable – by causing the patient to connect them with bad feelings. It’s no longer used by professional doctors, but apparently Schulz didn’t care. That’s what he has done to you. But I can fix it. And I will if you let me…”

“O-okey…”

Ellie smiled even though she could feel the tears springing into her eyes.

“Close your eyes” she asked

“W-why?”

“Do you trust me?”

“I- Yes”

“Then just to it”

Ronnie hesitated, but she knew Ellie would never hurt her. If anything she would catch her if she “falls”. And so she closed her eyes.

“Don’t open them until I say so, okay?”

“Okay”

The psychiatrist took a deep breath and slowly leaned in. She gently kissed the girl. Ronnie was taken aback at first. She was confused and almost petrified. All the thing that Doctor Schulz had said suddenly came back and hit her even harder than before. Her mind felt overload. The unexpected interaction scared her. The touch, the intimacy, the kiss… It all scared her, but at the same time it was comforting. It was thanks to Ellie of course. She was the one that made Ronnie’s mind slow down. The feeling of peace flew through the girl’s body and slowly began to fill every fibre of it. Her mind started to calm down. The anxiety subsided and that felt better than anything.

“I love you Ronnie” Ellie said pulling away “You’re enough and you deserve all the love in this world”

Ronnie slowly opened her eyes. She was a bit afraid to do it, because what if all that was only a dream? What if it wasn’t real? Though she opened them and there she was. Doctor Ellie Staple in all her glory. Her beautiful, brown eyes staring hopefully at the girl with nothing else, but love.

It was her. She was the remedy. The queen of peace, who was bringing Ronnie’s mind and soul a kind of relief that nothing and nobody else could.

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#dr ellie staple #dr ellie staple x patient #ellie staple x ronnie #asylum #Part 3 #glass movie

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