#and he and Buck can fight about it because Buck is like I don’t understand it was the right choice
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I tried to do the character sorter but then it made me pick between Chris and Buck and the psychic damage was too great
#i’m fragile#the concept of someone having to choose between the two of them in any context was too much for me#that said great angst opportunity#it’s not trapped dads at all it’s trapped Chris and Buck#and Eddie and Buck both know who Eddie is choosing#bucks fine with it Eddie is NOT fine with it#but he’s going to save his kid#and like Chris is there they can’t act scared they can’t say anything#he promises#he Promises to come back for Buck. you have to hold on. I’m coming back for you#and partially that’s to get Chris to leave him#Chris is fighting tooth and nail not to leave his Buck#but they have to go#and even if he gets Buck out fine too Eddie has to live with having had to make that choice#and he and Buck can fight about it because Buck is like I don’t understand it was the right choice#don’t you ever fucking pick me over chris#and eddie wouldn’t!#but fuck you for making him choose!#and then they kiss about it or whatever#angrily at first but Eddie’s a wreck so then it’s like a gross wet crying kiss#then bucks just holding him#eddie quietly says I know you’d choose him too#but can you honestly tell me it would be easy to leave me behind? it wouldn’t tear you in fucking half?#and… oh…. Buck gets it more now……#he’d been thinking about saving chris. he hadn’t been thinking about losing eddie#about eddie losing him#they kiss again softer now#this is probably in a hospital cmon we love hurt comfort here bucks roughed up#they’re having this fight very quietly because chris is asleep a foot away on a couch#it’s ok. soon they’ll all get to go home together. it will be ok
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you're my happily ever after (so i'll take my chance now, risk it all somehow)
rating: G
words: 2.6k
8x06 fix-it, because I'm pissed - I or my fics aren't going anywhere tho <3
thank you to @evansboyfrend for beta reading, ily 🫶
[also on Ao3]
It feels like the whole world is crumbling down. It feels like the Earth should shake, burst on fire, open up and swallow everything around. As dramatic as it is, he kind of expects it to happen, and it’s weird that he’s still sitting here. His ears are ringing, panic rising in his chest with each of Tommy’s words. He watches Tommy get up and head for the door, and he’s frozen to his spot. It’s not- it can’t be. It fucking can’t be. “Wait,” he finally manages to say, trying to keep his voice from trembling, “did you just break up with me?” He asks, hoping to any entity that listens that he just misinterpreted it, that he got it wrong. Because- because he can’t lose Tommy. He’s falling for him so fast and so hard. He’s ready for the next step. He’s ready to move in together. He’s ready to talk about one day, eventually, maybe getting married. He knows he wants that. He knows what he wants, and he wants Tommy. “Yeah, I guess I did.” Tommy answers, glancing back at him, his expression sad but firm. But Buck knows him. Knows that this mask will crumble into something devastated as soon as he leaves. That Tommy’s heart will shatter, just as Buck’s is right now. He can see through Tommy, he knows that he cares about Buck. It just- it doesn’t make sense. What was he even talking about… It was all so much, so fast, Buck’s brain is still scrambling trying to understand it all. “Believe me, I didn’t see-” Tommy starts, but Buck shakes his head and interrupts him. “No.” He stands up, his legs feeling shaky. Tommy fully turns towards him, confusion in his face. “What do you mean, ‘no’?” He frowns.
“I mean, no, you’re not breaking up with me.” Buck says more confidently than he feels. Because this can’t be it. The last six months, the best six months of his fucking life, can’t end like this. Can’t end at all. He won’t have this. “I know you care about me. And I care about you. And I don’t want to break up.” He sees Tommy open his mouth to speak, his expression hardening – putting on a mask again, trying to hide the hurt. He speaks again before Tommy can. “If you truly, genuinely want this, not because you think it’s gonna be better for me or you, but because you don’t want to be with me, fine, I can respect that. But I won’t accept it without a fight. I- I wanna fight for us, Tommy.” Buck steps closer to him, hoping that Tommy doesn’t step back, that might just break him. He doesn’t, he’s stuck in place, sad eyes on Buck’s. “Let me fight for us. You-” he adds quickly, on a roll now, not wanting Tommy to interrupt until after he’s done, after he’s said his piece. He needs to say it all now, let Tommy know how he feels. He can’t watch him leave without trying to fix it first. Tommy’s looking at him intently, just listening, not even trying to speak. “You gave me a second chance once, when I fucked up our first date, and I- I want to believe it wasn’t for nothing. So- so you’re my first man, so what?” Buck throws his hands up in frustration, he thinks he’s starting to sound a little frantic, speaking faster and faster. He just can’t let Tommy leave without him knowing exactly how Buck feels. “It’s far from my first relationship ever. Why- why is it so different just because you’re a man? It shouldn’t be. I don’t need to date other people, experiment or whatever else. I’ve dated people, slept around, did it all. I know how that goes, how it feels, and I don’t want to do it again. I know what I want, Tommy. And I want you. And don’t you dare tell me how I feel.” He feels anger seep in, Tommy’s words ringing in his head. What the actual fuck was he thinking? “I’m a grown man, I know how I feel. Yeah, it’s new and exciting, but it’s also real. It’s real to me, and- and if there’s any chance of forever, I want to take it. And-” he takes a breath. He feels like he’s been speaking in one breath, feeling a little lightheaded now, his heart hammering. Or maybe that’s just the panic. “And don’t start with the whole ‘I’m not your last’ bullshit.” He shakes his head again, tears welling up in his eyes, anger still building. Really, what in the world? How could Tommy want to just throw away the most wonderful relationship that’s happened to Buck in years? Maybe ever? “You don’t know that. I don’t know that. Yeah, we could break up one day. But you could also be my forever, and I could be yours. I’d love a chance to find out, even if it hurts in the end. But maybe that’s just me. Maybe I’m the only one here brave enough to risk it. And- and what about my heart, huh?” Tears are threatening to spill, his voice shaking now, with sadness and anger, and desperation. He can’t let him go, he can’t. “You said I’d break your heart eventually. But this, right now? This is you breaking mine.” He finishes, almost panting now, his monologue taking the wind out of him, wanting to say everything on his mind, in his heart. He hopes he got his point across.
“Evan.” Tommy just whispers, with a pained expression. There are tears in his eyes, too, one lone one slipping through, falling down his cheek. Buck’s hand itches to reach out and wipe it off, but he’s not sure if he’s allowed to anymore.
“Give us a chance, Tommy. Let us fight for this. Fight for me, for us. Fight with me.” He’s aware he sounds like he’s begging at this point, but he doesn’t care. This is too important. “I thought it’s been so good between us lately-”
“It has!” Tommy rushes to say. “It’s been amazing. You make me so happy. That’s why I’m scared, I just- I’m sorry, Evan, but I can’t let myself get hurt like this again. Because I- I’ve been there before, and it was hard to get back up, and with you- I don��t think I’d be able to ever recover from this one.” He admits, his stone-faced facade crumbling, and Buck can see his own feelings reflected in Tommy’s expression. Sad, devastated, heartbroken.
“We can- we can take some time apart.” Buck says around a lump in his throat. He feels like he can’t breathe. All he wants is to rewind until before he dropped the moving in bomb which must be what made Tommy freak out. He could say anything else, and take it slower, and maybe they’d be on their way out right now, a date night like they planned. “If that’s what you need. A break. But not for good. And then let’s come back to it clear-headed, knowing for sure what we want. And if you still want to break up, I- I’ll respect that. But I already know what I want,” he repeats firmly, decisively. “I want a future with you. I want to move in together, and one day down the line get married, and- and I want it all with you. We can slow down if I’m rushing this. I tend to do that, and if it’s scaring you, I’m sorry.” He adds, not wanting to backtrack any of this, but aware of how intense he’s coming off. He’s never been more serious about anything in his life. “But the past six months have been the best in my life. I’ve never felt so happy, so free, so comfortable, so safe. And I’m not giving up on you, Tommy. I will fight for you until I can’t anymore, until you tell me that you don’t care about me and I should just fuck off.”
“Evan. You know I’ll never say that.” Tommy responds quietly.
“I know. Because I’m confident in us, in the fact that you do care, and you do want me. I know that.” Buck emphasizes, and realizes, not for the first time, that he never felt like this before. This secure. This confident about someone wanting him. “I also know you’re just trying to protect yourself, your heart, and I get it. But I can’t let you go without a fight. I won’t. I messed up a lot in my life, and I won’t mess up this. I refuse to. Because I-” he takes a sharp breath, the words pressing on his lips. He doesn’t want to say it for the first time in a possible break up, a moment of such anger and devastation. But he needs to put it all out there. Needs Tommy to understand how much he’s trying to throw away right now. “I love you, Tommy.” He confesses, sees Tommy’s face melt into the saddest expression Buck’s ever seen on anyone, tears spilling freely now. Both of theirs, he realizes, feeling wetness on his cheeks. “I’ve been falling for you a little bit more with each day we spend together, with each minute. And I know- I hope you feel the same. But if you can look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t-” he swallows thickly, the thought alone is too much to bear.
“I can’t do that.” Tommy interrupts quickly. “Of course I love you, Evan. It happened so quickly it kind of scared me a little.”
“I noticed.” Buck says dryly, and Tommy lets out a humorless chuckle. “If you ask me, which you didn’t, by the way, you decided for both of us, which was an asshole move,” he points out, and Tommy looks away, as if ashamed. Good. Buck loves him, which means he’s gonna call out when he’s acting shitty. “I’d rather give us a real try and get my heart shattered if it comes to this, instead of always wondering what if, always wondering if you’re my one who got away. Which you would be.”
“I’m sorry.” He shakes his head, takes a step towards Buck, now just half a step away. “I’m sorry, maybe breaking up is too hasty. Impulsive,” he scoffs at himself, probably remembering how he called Buck that just a few minutes ago. Well, so maybe they’re both a little impulsive. Not a problem, in Buck’s opinion. “I don’t- I don’t want to break up. I never want to be away from you.” He says, his voice barely above a whisper. His hand flinches at his side, like he wants to reach out, grab Buck’s, touch him. Buck hopes he does. “It just- it seemed too fast. Like you got wrapped up in the moment. It’s still so new, I thought we were taking it one step at a time, and I didn’t-” he takes a deep breath, as if bracing himself, and Buck knows what he says is going to sting – and it does, it feels like a gut punch, actually, “I didn’t think you were as serious about this as I was getting. And I realize we should’ve done the mature thing and talked it out. I’m sorry. It’s just, we’ve barely talked about any future here. But I want it, of course I do. I’m just- I’m scared. My heart has never been in this much danger.” He looks into Buck’s eyes as he says it, more vulnerable than ever. This is everything Buck wants right now, for them to talk, to discuss this, to try fixing it, instead of one of them running away and the other giving up and not fighting for it. Buck’s been there, he doesn’t want a repeat.
“Tommy.” Buck is the one to close the distance between them, carefully brings his hands up to cup Tommy’s face, giving him a chance to back away, but he doesn’t. Instead, he breathes out a sigh of relief, like he craved Buck’s touch as much as Buck craves his. “You remember when I told you I wanted something with you? Even though I didn’t know what that something was yet?” he asks and Tommy nods slightly, Buck’s palms still resting on his cheeks. “I’ve been serious about you since that precise moment. About pursuing this, and wanting some kind of future with you. I know I tend to rush into things, it’s been a problem before.” He huffs a self-deprecating laugh. “I tried not to do that with you, but I failed, clearly. I just think from now on, we both should stay and talk and try to work it out if we have any issues with something. If you still want me.” He adds a little anxiously, but relaxed when he feels Tommy’s palms settle on his hips.
“Of course I want you, Evan. I always will.” Tommy says, that loving look in his eyes, that always makes Buck’s heart melt a little. That look that Buck loves so much, that made him think that Tommy might feel the same way.
“Good. Like I said, I’m not letting you go. Ever.” He says decisively, a huge weight that’s been there since the topic even started finally lifting off his chest. This might be the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and no matter the conclusion – which he’s pretty sure will be the happily ever after he’s always craved – it’s worth the risk, it’s worth everything.
“Good.” Tommy echoes, that gorgeous, scrunchy smile of his slowly spreading on his face, and it’s like sunshine came out from behind stormy clouds. “I don’t intend on letting you go, either. I love you, sweetheart. And I’m so sorry for… for this mess. For overreacting.”
“That’s fine, we’re past this- well, actually, we are gonna talk about it more, but at least we’re on the same page now, I hope.” Buck says, slowly leaning in. “I love you so much. I never want to lose you.”
“I’m sorry.” Tommy says again, and Buck just wants him to stop saying it. It’s fine, they’re fine now. “You won’t. You have me for as long as you want. I promise.”
“What if I want you forever?” Buck whispers, his face so close to Tommy's, their lips almost brush. It sends a shiver down his spine, like he hasn’t kissed him in days, when they just exchanged a quick kiss hello a few minutes ago.
“That works for me.” Tommy smiles again, and finally dives in for a kiss, but it lasts barely a second before he’s pulling away, Buck trying to follow. Tommy chuckles, running a comforting hand up and down Buck’s side. “But maybe let’s put a pause on the whole moving in together thing, huh? At least until we fully talk everything through.”
“Yeah, good idea.” Buck nods, his gaze flickering between Tommy’s eyes, now sparkling happily, and his pretty, kissable lips. It feels so good to be able to just have a mature conversation and resolve whatever issues arise. If they keep doing that, he thinks they’re going to be okay. He’ll make sure of that. “No need to be impulsive,” he adds, his lips twisting into a teasing smirk.
“Okay.” Tommy chuckles quietly, his cheeks reddening. “Just kiss me.”
Buck doesn’t need to be told twice. He kisses Tommy like he means it, like he’s his person, like he’s the love of his life, trying to put all those emotions into a kiss. He knows for sure he’s getting the same intent back. And at this moment, in his kitchen, narrowly avoiding losing his love because of a stupid reason, he decides it. One day, not too quickly, but not too far into the future, he’s going to ask Tommy Kinard to marry him. And he’s more than sure of the response he’ll get.
[also on Ao3]
#bucktommy fic#fix it fic#bucktommy#wikiangela writes#911 fic#911 8x06#my writing#evan buckley#bucktommy fanfic#tommy kinard#911 fanfic#evan x tommy#buck x tommy#tevan#kinley#read on ao3#dailykinley#911 spoilers#bucktommy fluff#angst and hurt/comfort#angst and feels#bucktommy angst#not gonna tag my tag list this time bc Im exhausted and also not sure who's in the headspace for a fix-it rn#im here if anyone wants to vent or talk btw#and im not going anywhere fuck this
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Begging for more soundwave...especially the kink list. We are just little creatures in need of big mech babes XD
Not sure if you meant silent, tentacle cryptid Soundwave or IDW tired, single-dad Soundwave… so here’s both versions 🌶️ 18+ Mass displaced mechs
Soundwave x Reader- Encounters 🌶️
IDW Soundwave x Reader- bad dream
• He can feel the moment your dreams shift and go somewhere dark. Your emotions snarling and crackling over him as he sits up and looks over at you. Face buried against your pillow, you shift in your sleep. Reaching over, he smoothes a palm along your spine, the contact strengthening the connection between you two, but he can’t make any sense of the nightmare, only the visceral fear. Venting softly, he hooks an arm under you and pulls you into his lap.
• Your distress follows you into waking as you fight the arm wrapped around you in blind panic before Soundwave hums at you, holding you as the shaking eases leaving your heart racing. A fact he notes by pressing a servo right over that frantic rhythm. His mask brushes against your cheek and neck as he rumbles against you. “Safe, little one.” Smiling at that low, tonal voice, you lean into him in response.
• “Did I wake you?” Worrying about him to try and hide how shaken you still are? Sliding his palm up to tip your head back against his shoulder, he vents against your skin just to feel your body go taut against him. Knows if he asks you won’t tell him about the nightmare. It’s not the first time and as much as it bothers him, likely won’t be the last. Whatever haunts your rest is something you don’t trust him with yet. He understands even as it doesn’t sit right with him, but he also knows how to banish that fear from your thoughts completely.
• Servos against your throat, keeping your head back against his shoulder so your body is arched, you feel the arm curled around you shift, slide down to cup you. Know exactly what he’s doing, because somehow he knows when that nightmare surfaces and his response since you can’t talk about it is always the same. Distraction. Shuddering as his servos pet you, stroking as you respond for him. Body heating and softening, because this sort of distraction? The kind that makes you feel alive and cherished? You need it right now. “Please,” you murmur, rocking against his servos and with a low growl, he buries one inside you. Curling it to stroke deep.
• You tremble in his grip, hips bucking to demand more. Fucking you with that one servo in slow deliberate strokes until you’re mindlessly whimpering his name. Begging for him. Until he just can’t fight it anymore. That noise you make when he slips his wet servo free so sweet to him. Lifting your hips and guiding himself to you. And that noise when he buries himself fully inside you in one deep stroke? It almost undoes him right there. Shuddering with restraint, he grips your hips to keep you still while he reins himself in, because otherwise you’ll start moving in his lap and it’ll be over far too soon.
• “Soundwave,” you groan, head falling back against him as he keeps you still. Won’t thrust and won’t let you rock against him, tormenting you with that thick spike stretching you. “Please.” Growling against you, he lifts you until he’s almost free of you, shuddering when you grab onto his hands in protest, because you might just die if he does stop now. But then he’s lowering you again, slowly so you can feel every ridge and bump of his spike. Too slow when your body is thrumming and aching.
• It’s almost like drowning in you, the connection between you both one sided as your emotions crash over him and then he’s gripping your hips, moving you faster on his spike as your need fuels his own. Your head thrown back against him, needy sounds getting ragged and louder as he lifts his hips as he pulls you down, the wet sounds of your body taking his fraying the last of his control. Now he’s making noises, growling as he claims you in urgent drives of his hips and chasing after when you tighten on his spike. Burying himself deep and pinning you in place as he releases inside you, hips rocking to stretch it out.
TFP Soundwave x Reader-tease
• Always busy. Always working. You watch his long servos flying over that weird holographic keyboard, his visored face limned in the screen’s glow as line after line of indecipherable alien gibberish scrolls away. And you’re bored as you stare at his spiky back, mind wandering to things you could be doing instead of work. Like him. And that head turns to stare at you, tipping with predatory interest. The weight of that stare making you breathless with anticipation. Because while he can’t read your thoughts exactly as far as you can figure, he definitely can pick up on when your mind goes hurtling in that direction.
• Need and hunger, pull at him in an intoxicating rush as your face reddens because you know he knows. Snaring you with a tendril looped around your middle, he brings you to him and mass shifts. Your emotions crash over him, straining his own control as you cling to that tendril. Protesting with a laugh as he uses his servos to shred the thin coverings you wear. Needing more connection. A second tendril coiling around your upper thigh, curving to run against you and find you already so wet for him.
• Rocking your hips against the tendril to feel it sliding against you, it’s all you can do to bite back a whimper because he’s toying with you. “Mean. So mean,” you groan as the coil around you tightens slowly before easing. The tendril against you slides again in lovely friction but not nearly enough before he’s finally lowering you onto his spike, long servos curling around your hips to pull you down flush and keep you there. It’s for calling him mean. You know it is and his grip is too strong, you can’t move the way you want to. Need to move as you feel that big spike speared inside you, pulsing with his spark.
• So needy and impatient as he savors the feel of that wet, silken heat gripping his spike. Curling an arm around you, he carefully rolls you under him, pressing his visor against your throat as you gasp. Tendrils capture your wrists, pulling those soft hands up and pinning them and those eyes flash at him in annoyance. But if he lets you have any control, it’s over far too soon. You arch under him as he rocks himself against you teasingly before he begins to thrust in earnest. You don’t understand how hard it is to stay in control when he’s inside you, that telepathic link molten with your need. Feeling what you feel.
• Finally, he begins moving, that spike driving deep as he sets a brutal, urgent pace. He lets go of your wrists long enough to snake one tendril under you and hook around your waist, lifting your hips up and the next thrust slides deep, sparking through you. “Right there, please,” you want to push back to meet those thrusts and can’t with his grip, your hips up as he moves faster, harder, every deep stroke of that spike sliding right where you need it. Right there. And you’re coming apart with a cry as he ruts against you, silent except for the wet sounds of his spike pumping inside you and your own ragged cries before he drives deep, hips jerking against you as warmth spreads through you with his release. That visor rubs against your cheek until your eyes open, breathing raggedly and you snort when he offers you a little heart emoji.
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I’ve decided that from here forward I’m writing Tommy and Buck/Evan as long term canon. In the words of Buck himself “Who cares?!”
I get the feeling that Tommy is difficult to get really angry. Mostly based on his past. And his general roll with the punches attitude thus far. So I don’t foresee a lot of strife or fighting in his future with Buck. Except the first time Tommy experiences the after of that big marshmallow Evan Buckley doing something really dangerous and reckless..again.
And Tommy who never gets angry, who never shouts at Buck, who flew a helicopter into a goddamn hurricane in the middle of the ocean, really loses his shit this time because Buck cannot understand why Tommy is so upset that he dropped into a dangerous situation against orders AGAIN.
Tommy pinches the bridge of his nose to keep from shouting “Bobby told you not to go in. He told you not to risk it. That the floors were too unstable”
“There could have been someone left” Buck replies “Someone needed to check. It had to be me”
“Why? Because you’re fucking super human? The great Buck Buckley from the 118 who scoffs at danger, has survived a tsunami, getting trapped beneath a fire truck, throwing a blood clot, and was officially dead for three minutes after getting struck by FUCKING LIGHTNING!”
“How do you know about all of that?”
“That isn’t what matters”
“I think it is” Buck takes a step toward Tommy “Have you been stalking me babe?”
Noticing the mischievous smile Tommy shakes his head “Oh no no no. You are not going to adorable your way out of this”
Bucks shoulders sag and he sighs “I’m ok Tommy. Not even a scratch”
“I can see that” Tommy lets out a deep exhale “I understand the risks of the job. I’m not like your exes who would get all distraught over you removing a cat from a tree. But for fucks sake, you are worse than the EOD guys when I was in Afghanistan with the walking - or in your case running or jumping- right into the worst case scenario with no thought of your own safety” Rubbing his forehead he continues “Evan. You’ve got a savior complex and it’s noble and selfless..”
Buck cuts him off “It’s not a savior complex. I’m not stupid. I understand that sometimes no matter what you do you can’t save them. But sometimes maybe you can, and in those cases, I just make the most sense”
Tommy crosses his arms to keep from strangling him or kissing him stupid again to shut him up “How is that? How does you possibly dying make any sense?”
“They all have people that need them. They all have someone they belong to and..” he trails off with a small shrug
And Tommy hears the words he doesn’t say. He is…expendable. And just like that all of the anger drains out of Tommy to be replaced by a something else. “Evan” he says softly.
“I know” Buck interjects “I know that people love me and they would be sad, especially Maddie. And I don’t want to die. But I don’t want someone who has someone they need, and that needs them, to die either. I couldn’t live with that”
Tommy closes his eyes. This man..How can he be so adorable and selfless, yet so completely stubborn and a pain in the ass about his own safety?
Once he calms his thoughts and finds the words he wants to say, he opens his eyes to see Evan looking at him calmly. Like he expects Tommy to see the sense in what he said.
“Evan. I know we haven’t really put a label on this. On us. But that’s because I don’t want to pressure you. I’m the first man you’ve been with and you’re still figuring out who you are, and I understand that. But let me clarify something for you. I need you to come back to me. Ok?”
Buck blinks “Huh”
“I need you to come back to me” he repeats “Like Bobby needs Athena, and Karen needs Hen, and yes like Maddie needs Chimney.
“And Jee-un. Jee-yun needs her dad”
“Yes, and in that same vein, Christopher needs Eddie” he agrees, trying not to give in to his exasperation. “I need you. I am that person who needs you to come home Evan”
Evan stops whatever he was about to say. Startled awareness creeping into his eyes..Tommy sees a mix of emotions flit across his face. Surprise, joy, fear, everything just races across that expressive face and then Evan sinks onto the barstool at his kitchen island. His hands coming up to cover his face.
Tommy’s stomach clench’s. He pushed too hard, too soon “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I do care and want you to come home but..”
Buck looks up at him “Don’t you dare take that back”
“I’m not taking it back. I just don’t want to push you”
Something else crosses Evans face at that..but he tugged at his bottom lip with his teeth. “You aren’t pushing. You aren’t pressuring me. I am in this just as much as you. I just don’t know how to say what I want to say without it sounding lame and emo as shit”
“Did you just hear me? You can say anything to me Evan. Whatever it is”
Buck rolls his bottom lip between his teeth again. “I’ve never questioned why I do this…I mean it’s the whole reason I was born. To save my brother. To save Daniel. That’s what I do, that’s who I am. It’s why I became a firefighter. To be the one who saves people. The 118 is my family. And I would do anything to protect them from harm”
“I’m not asking you to stop. I would never ask that. I just want to remind you that you matter to a lot of people, and you also have someone who is waiting for you”
Bucks voice is thick “I know that. I get that. But…Nobody has ever. I have never belonged to anyone, like that”
In a sense of deja vu Tommy closes the short distance to Buck. Tipping his face up, he kisses him. Not soft and gentle like their first kiss in this kitchen. But bold and deep. Branding Evan with his mouth. Pulling back he says fiercely “You belong to me like that. For as long as you want..you belong to me and I belong to you, like that”
“I will ALWAYS need you to come back to me Evan”
ao3 like per request
#yes I called him both Evan and Buck#it makes situational sense in my head canon#yes this idea was part of my 3k word barf#but I’m breaking it up into bits#911 abc#evan buckley#tommy kinard#buck x tommy#evan x tommy#911 spoilers#bucktommy#kinley#this ship will be canon goddamn it#wrote this on my phone#tevan
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Tommy’s dad comes to visit after Buck has moved in and Tommy is going a little insane with his cleaning. He’s re-vacuuming what Buck already did so the carpet has perfect lines, dusting perfectly clean shelves, hiding clutter underneath the beds, and putting the houseplants out back. Buck’s never seen him like this before, so out of sorts. He’s pulling at his hair, and triple checking the food, and ironing his clothes. Once he’s showered and his hair is perfectly set and his clothes are on, he keeps rubbing his hands over his shirt to make sure they don’t crease.
Buck asks if he’s okay but the exasperated, “yeah, mhm, fine,” all while looking like he’s about to have a nervous breakdown tells him everything he needs to know.
And then Walt arrives, and he might just have the best posture Buck has ever seen. He doesn’t smile as he shakes Tommy’s hand, gives Buck a grunt as he reluctantly shakes his hand next, and leads himself into the house. Tommy is consistently answering questions with “no, sir” and “yes, sir” and they seem more like commanding officer/subordinate than father/son.
Slowly, Buck begins to understand Tommy’s behavior because Walt makes little comments about everything. He cuts down the fact their place has wallpaper, doesn’t think the bookshelf Tommy made will hold up much longer, mentions he should use a straight razor for a better shave, says the food is a little bland, furniture too bright for his taste. These are all things randomly mixed in conversation, and Buck sees Tommy tense a little more with each one.
It gets to a point where Buck is about open his mouth and tell him to get the hell out, but Tommy grabs his hand and gives it a squeeze, stopping him before he starts. A silent shake of the head tells Buck it’s not worth it, he’s not worth it. Please don’t start a fight, just let this evening end.
When he finally does leave, Tommy sits on the couch and kind of stares off in the distance. Buck doesn’t say anything, just sits beside him and pulls him close. Tommy asks, “I’m never gonna be enough for him, am I? No matter what I do.” And there’s nothing Buck can really say, so he holds Tommy a little tighter, lets him fall apart in his arms, and helps to pick up the broken pieces afterward.
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all this new content and speculation and discourse has distracted me from equally important matters, namely the (platonic) eddietommy of it all … because the potential there is for their relationship this season??? so many possibilities and i’d eat up every one of them
eddietommy bonding over all things buck
eddietommy butting heads over who gets to spend time with buck
alternatively, eddietommy being sympathetic towards each other regarding buck time — tommy insists eddie spends more time with buck while eddie swears he’s fine (he’s not)
eddietommy, in the midst of the buck time drama, confessing that they miss hanging out with each other just as much; tommy was eddie’s friend first, after all!
this post because eddietommy should be able to exist independent of buck
tommy desperately trying to keep eddie from going down the same path he did 20 years ago and turning into a gerrard minion (this scenario has had me frothing at the mouth since the s7 finale. like you don’t understand i need tommy to beg)
veering into fic territory with this one, but tommy reassuring eddie that he is a good dad. bonus if he uses his own shitty dad as a contrast. bonus bonus if he’s angsty about it “do you even understand how lucky christopher is to have a dad who loves him like you do?”
(now this is very much fic territory but i want the last two points to be combined and turned into a dramatic scene where they’re both yelling at each other but they’re not really fighting and they both just break down in front of each other because big men being sad is like crack to me)
eddietommy performing michaelbobby-level shenanigans
eddietommy bonding over their army experiences
this fucking post about eddie’s potential reaction to tommy’s helicopter crashing
eddie just having someone else who he can bro out with and also be vulnerable with. 7x04 sets thier friendship up as one that’s so unique and intriguing and if it isn’t explored in s8 i will be pressing charges
#eddietommy has captured me once again#it’s once in a blue moon but when it happens it consumes my soul#eddietommy#eddie diaz#tommy kinard#bucktommy
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Princess Diaries 2 au!
not me already cheating askdjfhsa so i actually have the first chapter of this fic written but i never got any further than that so i never posted it. but!!! that means you are in luck bc i can offer you 3.5k almost immediately lmao
i had a lot of fun rereading this though so hopefully this might give me some motivation to keep going with it ��✨
-
“You want to do what?”
Buck’s parents regard him with identical disdainful looks. It’d almost be intimidating if he wasn’t on the receiving end of looks like that from both of them at least once a day.
“Evan, this doesn’t concern you,” his mother sighs.
“Like hell it doesn’t!” he exclaims, looking wildly between his parents and his sister. “Aren’t you forgetting what happened the last time you tried to stick Maddie in an arranged marriage-“
“Evan,” Maddie cuts in, voice gentle but firm enough for Buck to deflate. The smile she offers him is resigned. “It’s alright.”
“It’s not alright,” he protests weakly.
“Maddie understands the responsibilities she has as our daughter,” his father says, the, you don’t, heavily implied.
“Regardless, she’s far too old to be concerning herself with something as trivial as a love match,” his mother scoffs and Maddie’s mouth tightens into a thin line.
His parents love to bring up that Maddie is in her late thirties and still single. As if the whole reason for that isn’t because the last person they set up her up with tried to kill her – a trauma from which she’s obviously still recovering. Buck’s not about to let it happen again, not on his watch.
“Do you understand what a match like this could do for our family?” Margaret continues. Buck’s never understood his parents’ obsession with titles and social climbing. He would’ve figured still being a viscount and viscountess would be enough for anyone when, y’know, no one gives a shit about the monarchy nowadays.
“Besides, lord knows the Diazes would be indebted to us for even agreeing to it,” Philip adds with a derisive snort.
“I’ve heard Prince Edmundo is very pleasant,” Maddie offers, clearly trying to placate Buck and possibly trying to convince herself also. She’s putting on a brave face but Buck knows she’s nervous after Doug. It’s been years but Maddie still jumps at shadows.
Buck rolls his eyes. He may never have met him before but Buck has heard the scandal surrounding Prince Edmundo. He fell in love with a commoner and tried to marry her but his parents refused the match. Then, four years ago, a child was left at the palace gates with a letter addressed to Prince Edmundo. Apparently before they were forced apart Edmundo had gotten her pregnant and she was no longer in a position to take care of the child. Within hours, the whole world knew.
The Diazes had hired an entire new security team after that.
Buck hasn’t heard much since but he does know the potential marriage King Ramon and Queen Helena had been arranging for Edmundo completely fell through with the reveal of the child and he hasn’t publicly dated anyone since.
So now they’re here: a proposed match between Maddie and Edmundo so Edmundo can ascend the throne in the fall like he’s supposed to.
“I still don’t like it,” Buck mutters.
“How about a compromise?” Maddie suggests then. “We have a trial period.
“I personally have no desire to get married to a stranger – I would, at least, like to know the man’s favourite food or his hobbies – so why don’t we see if Prince Edmundo would be agreeable to my coming to stay at the palace? Six months. A proper courtship. And, if anything untoward happens or I suspect something isn’t right, the union is ended.”
Their parents share a look, conversing only with their eyes and pinched mouths. Eventually their father looks back to them. “If the Diazes agree, then fine. But Maddie, you are running out of time. If Prince Edmundo doesn’t marry you then you can’t protest whoever else we choose. You’ve put it off long enough.”
Buck wants to protest but he knows this isn’t his fight. He’ll get his turn whenever they decide to turn his attention to him. He watches Maddie take a measured breath and is, once again, in awe of his sister’s ability to keep her composure. He can never do that. He always feels too much.
She looks their parents dead in the eye and nods. “I understand.”
“I’ll write to Helena then,” Margaret sighs.
~
“I don’t like it.”
Eddie just about refrains from rolling his eyes. He suspects the hand he has braced against his temple is just about the only thing preventing his parents from seeing the exasperation on his face.
“It sounds perfectly reasonable to me,” Eddie says and his mother clucks her tongue.
“Of course it does, Eddie. You’re just looking for a way to get out of this.”
“No, I’m not,” he exhales. He’s long since given up on trying to get out of this marriage. Any hope he had of marrying for love ended when his parents forced him to kick Shannon to the curb. Christopher arriving on his doorstep a few years ago left that hope buried six feet beneath the ground.
Truthfully, he doesn’t care anymore. His priority is Christopher now. He doesn’t need romantic love; all he needs is a political match with someone who will, at best, be decent to his son or, at worst, ignore Eddie and Christopher except for public appearances.
He understands Maddie’s reticence though.
“Maddie’s last fiancé tried to murder her, Mother,” Eddie points out. “She doesn’t know me. Of course she’d be hesitant to marry immediately.”
“Philip and Margaret never mentioned this when we were making the arrangements though,” his father cuts in and Eddie does roll his eyes this time.
“They probably hadn’t told her yet,” he says. “Really, I don’t mind.” If anything, six months in which his parents fixate on someone else besides him sounds like a dream come true.
His parents whisper to each other but Eddie doesn’t bother trying to listen in. Instead he glances out the window to where Chimney is training in their new security hire, Ravi. The kid looks fresh out of high school and like he spooks way too easily but Eddie still wishes he was out there with them. Or in the playroom with Carla and Christopher.
Or anywhere that isn’t here.
“Fine,” Helena says, snapping him back into reality. “We’ll allow it. But you are to be on your best behaviour, Eddie. Do you understand how difficult it was for us to find you a match after your indiscretions-“
“You mean my son?”
His mother huffs. “You know we love Christopher. But people talk and you must admit your actions with that woman were completely reckless. Just like always.”
Eddie ducks his head, fists clenching in frustration. “Mom, it’s been nearly ten years since I last even saw Shannon. I was a kid. I was stupid. But I’m not going to apologise for it. Not when it gave me my son.”
“Don’t speak to your mother like that,” Ramon commands but then he folds, just slightly, and rubs at his forehead. “This is a good thing, Edmundo. It’s almost time for you to ascend the throne. It is your turn to honour this family; try to see that.”
Eddie doesn’t think there’s a single word in the English language he hates more than honour. Rolling his shoulders, he lowers his gaze and nods in acquiescence.
~
Eddie spends the rest of the day preparing for the Buckleys’ arrival with Hen, taking the chance to duck away to his room when she gets a phone call. She scowls at him and flaps her hand in a gesture that clearly indicates she doesn’t want him to go anywhere but he pretends not to understand and gets out of reach before she can grab him.
She’s confirmed Maddie’s brother, Evan, will be coming with her as well as Maddie’s personal security guard, Athena Grant. Eddie wasn’t aware the children of viscounts needed their own security detail but he guesses for Maddie it might be an extra precaution.
He’s heard the story, of course. How she and her previous husband had beaten the odds. Arranged marriages were common in their world but one that was also a love match was all but unheard of for people like them.
But Maddie and her fiancé, Doug, had seemed like the real thing. Their lavish wedding had been the talk of royal enthusiasts everywhere – the only people who actually pay attention to high society weddings. Then, a little over a year ago, Maddie was brutally attacked and almost killed.
Her husband had been the culprit.
And if Eddie’s sources are to be believed, Doug had been beating her the entire time they were together. Honestly, Eddie’s surprised she even agreed to the match. Though, if her parents are anything like his own, he doubts she had any say in the matter.
It makes him feel only the tiniest bit better about his own situation.
Losing Shannon is a pain that still aches deep inside of him but at least he’d loved her and she’d loved him back. And if nothing else, she’d given him Christopher, the most precious gift of Eddie’s life.
With him and Maddie…well. He doesn’t think they’ll fall in love but maybe they can be friends. After all, isn’t that what marriage is? Companionship? Eddie’s had love now; he knows what it felt like. Once is more than enough for him. He can be grateful for that – it’s more than most people get in his line of work.
A knock at his open door rouses him from his reverie and he looks up to find his abuela standing at the threshold, a mischievous sort of smile on her face.
“Abuela,” he says warmly.
“I hear we have visitors coming?” she says, crossing into his room and coming to rest at the chaise longue near his writing desk.
“I’m pretty sure Mom’s arranging a car as we speak,” he says, flashing a fake smile.
Abuela hums, regarding him with an appraising look as if she’s trying to read everything he’s not saying in the set of his shoulders or the slant of his eyebrows. She’s always been far too perceptive when it comes to him.
“How are you really feeling, Eddito?” she asks. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
Eddie hangs his head, letting out a weary sigh, before coming to sit beside her. “Do I have much of a choice?”
“You always have a choice,” she tuts. “Don’t let your parents make you think you don’t.”
“I always knew what my life would be. This isn’t some cruel twist of fate handed down by the universe. It’s my duty – to my family, to this kingdom.”
“And what about your duty to yourself?” she asks quietly and Eddie looks away.
He takes a moment to rally himself before he can manage to smile at her again. “I’ve gotten everything I want from life already. Christopher is enough. I don’t need anything else.”
Abuela watches him with something that could be pity on anyone else. From her, it’s just an overwhelming sense of empathy and love. She reaches out to pat his cheek and Eddie marvels – as he always does – at the way the casual affection he shares with her and his aunt never comes as easily with his parents.
“Protect yourself, Eddie,” she murmurs, a quiet request. “Please. For me. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
He swallows, emotion he doesn’t expect clogging his throat. “You had an arranged marriage. So did Mom and Dad. I’ll be fine,” he promises, lifting a hand to cover Abuela’s with his own where it still rests on his cheek.
“I know,” she says, smiling in a way that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “And I was very happy with your abuelo. But you, mi ángel, have always dreamed of love. I want that for you.”
Tears burn behind his eyes but he blinks them away and forces a bright smile onto his face.
“I’m sure the Maddie will be a perfectly good match.”
It sounds like a lie even to himself.
~
Buck yanks at his tie for the sixth time since they got out of the car and Maddie slaps his hand away.
“Relax,” she mutters. “I feel like you’re more nervous than I am.”
He lets his hand drop with a sigh, shooting Athena a winning grin when she casts them both a sidelong glance. She rolls her eyes before turning back to talking to the Diaz chief of staff, Bobby Nash, as they make their way up the steps of the palace. Henrietta Wilson, who is Bobby’s second in command and evidently personally responsible for Prince Edmundo, keeps pace with him and Maddie.
“How are you feeling?” he asks under his breath and Maddie gives him an exasperated smile.
“I’m fine,” she insists, reaching out to latch onto his pinkie finger with her own and giving it a quick squeeze. “You don’t need to worry.”
“I can’t help it,” he mutters.
Up until now Buck has been able to pretend this is all some farcical plan or- or a vacation for him and Maddie! But now they’re here and they’re about to have a formal introduction with the royal family and it suddenly feels real. Maddie’s getting married. Courtship or not, that’s the end goal in all this and she’s not going to be able to say no unless Buck can find a legitimate reason why.
And maybe it’s not Prince Edmundo’s fault and maybe he’s just as helpless in all of this as Maddie is but Buck’s still ready to hate him on sight.
This whole thing feels wrong, out of place. Maddie shouldn’t have to get married again if she doesn’t want to. And she sure as hell shouldn’t have to marry someone just to satisfy their parents’ need for social climbing. It’s not fair. She’s been through enough and he can’t believe their parents are willing to put her through another potential trauma by forcing her into an arranged marriage.
Well, not if Buck has anything to say about it.
He’s older now than he was when she and Doug first met and he’s determined to do whatever it takes to protect her. He even convinced his parents to let him be Maddie and Prince Edmundo’s chaperone during their courtship. (Not in an official capacity but still.)
It’s not much but if it lets him keep Maddie’s safe, it’s worth it.
They reach the main entryway and Buck grinds to an abrupt halt, just stopping short of barrelling straight into Athena. She gives him a look like she knows that’s exactly what he was about to do and he ducks his head, chagrined.
Henrietta clears her throat, clearly attempting to bite back a smirk when Buck looks up at her. “Ready?”
She’s talking to Maddie but Buck still has to tamp down on the urge to say no.
“Of course,” Maddie breathes and the doors open.
One of the other staff members introduces them. Buck hears it just as they step inside.
“Presenting the honourable Madeleine Buckley and her brother, Evan Buckley.”
The royal family are waiting by the staircase for them, their expressions ranging from eager to cordial.
And well. Prince Edmundo is exceedingly handsome, he’ll give him that.
He’s tall, though not quite as tall as Buck, dressed in formal attire with his hair swept back off his face in a way that looks seemingly effortless – unlike the fifteen minutes Buck spends in front of the mirror in the morning trying to make his curls sit just right. His tanned skin and big brown eyes, coupled with the affable smile make him seem…
Charming. He is, quite frankly, the fairy-tale definition of a Prince Charming and Buck feels himself seethe with something that’s not quite jealousy but maybe somewhere adjacent to that.
Prince Edmundo steps forward and, for the first time, Buck notices the little boy behind him. That must be his son, Christopher. He’s got crutches under his arms to keep him steady and one of the Diaz’s staff stands beside him – a kindly looking woman that keeps her hand protectively on his shoulder.
“Miss Buckley,” Prince Edmundo greets, stepping forward to take Maddie’s hand. He presses a faint kiss to the back of it and Buck bites the inside of his cheek so hard he’s pretty sure he draws blood. “It’s an honour to meet you.”
“And you as well, your highness,” Maddie replies, offering up a curtsy and a careful smile. And if nothing else, Buck will admit the smile Prince Edmundo offers in response seems more sincere than Doug’s ever was.
He turns to Buck then, extending a hand to shake.
“Your highness,” Buck greets before Prince Edmundo gets a chance to, giving his hand a too-tight shake and finishing it off with a half-assed smile.
Prince Edmundo raises an eyebrow but decorum wins out above anything else. “Mr Buckley,” he returns, his own hand tightening for a moment around Buck’s. If Buck didn’t know any better he’d almost think he was amused.
Queen Helena interrupts then, gliding forward to take Maddie’s hand. “Madeleine. It’s so lovely to finally meet you.”
Maddie bows again, greeting the queen with a, “Your majesty,” that betrays none of the unease she might be feeling. One thing’s for sure, their parents trained her well.
“Welcome to our home,” King Ramon adds, coming to stand beside his wife and offering Maddie a greeting of his own.
They greet Buck and Athena next, completely pleasant and completely perfunctory. Their focus is on Maddie and that’s abundantly clear. Well, that’s fine with Buck. It’ll make it a hell of a lot easier for him to poke holes in this whole match if no one’s paying attention to him.
“We hope your journey was pleasant?” Helena says, eyebrows raised expectantly.
“It was very comfortable,” Maddie assures. “It was so generous of you to send a car.”
“It was our pleasure,” Helena says then and she looks like she means it. “Well, we’d love to stay and chat a bit more but I’m afraid the king and I have a very important meeting we must attend to.”
“The work never stops,” Ramon jokes. “Eddie will show you to your living quarters and we’ll see you at dinner tonight.”
With that, they take their leave and Buck lets out the breath he’s been holding this entire time.
If he didn’t know any better, he’d say Prince Edmundo does the same. But then he turns to them with a beatific smile and gestures to the staircase.
“You must be tired after your journey. I can show you to your rooms and give you some time to get settled?”
The car ride had only been a couple of hours but Buck’s not gonna complain. Standing on ceremony is exhausting.
“Thank you, Prince Edmundo,” Maddie says because Buck might’ve used up all his manners by now but she clearly hasn’t. “That’s very kind of you.”
For the first time, there’s something almost awkward in the prince’s demeanour. Buck doesn’t understand what it is until he says, “Please, call me Eddie. I don’t see any reason why we should have to stick to formalities if we’re going to be getting to know each other as we are over the next few months.”
Maddie’s shoulders drop where she stands beside him and Buck is begrudgingly impressed Prince Edmundo – Eddie – has managed to put his sister at ease.
“In that case, please call me Maddie,” she says. “I don’t need any titles. And Evan-“
“Goes by Buck,” he cuts in, flashing Eddie a closed-lip smile.
“Buck,” Eddie repeats, as if testing the name out.
Buck hates that he actually likes how it sounds coming from him.
“I’ll remember that,” Eddie says before glancing over his shoulder. “And um, if we’re still making introductions, I’d like you to meet our chaperone.”
He steps aside and Buck watches as the little boy takes three tentative steps forward to stand at his father’s side. Eddie immediately crouches down to his level once he does, wrapping a comforting arm around him and Buck hates his own traitorous heart for melting a little at the sight. “This is my son, Christopher.”
“Hi, Christopher,” Maddie says, voice warm and welcoming, as she holds out a hand for him to shake. She always was amazing with kids. “It’s so nice to meet you.”
Christopher takes her hand after a moment’s hesitation and stutters out a soft, “Miss Buckley,” that has Buck biting his lip so he can maintain his composure.
Why did Eddie have to have such a cute kid?
“You don’t have to call me that,” Maddie says with a chuckle. “You can just call me Maddie if you like.”
Christopher nods and lets go of her hand and then Maddie is reaching back for Buck. “This is my brother, Evan.”
Buck huffs at his given name but obediently steps forward, crouching down in the same manner Eddie had to get on Christopher’s level.
“My friends call me Buck,” he tells Christopher with a wink, offering him a hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Christopher.”
“Nice to meet you too, Buck,” Christopher says with a bashful smile as he fits his tiny hand in Buck’s to shake it.
Eddie clears his throat and there’s something inscrutable in his expression when Buck looks at him. “How about we show you to your room?”
~
#buddie#buddie fic#911#my fics#meme thing#this is a little over half the first chapter#the intention was for this to be like 30k-ish
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Oh that made me think of lando and bestie play fighting and he puts his hand around her throat as a joke and then she just thrusts into him and it’s a moment ?? You know… I’m thinking too much brainrot toniight
I hope you don’t mind that I wrote a little something on this because whewwww the way it made me feel 😭
lando norris/female!reader (937 words)
Lando is bored. He’s got your feet in his lap, you’re wiggling your toes and the movement of them under your socks is more entertaining than the movie you’d chosen to watch. It wasn’t that he didn’t like romcoms, he just needed to do something else or he would literally die of boredom.
But still, the wistful sigh that escapes your lips makes him look up and you’re not even looking at him; Eyes trained on the television screen as Sally and Harry interact.
“What?” Lando asks because clearly you’re thinking about something and he’s dying to know what.
You gesture vaguely at the screen without tearing your eyes away, like he’s supposed to know what you’re sighing and fawning over. Lando pinches your big toe and you wiggle them out of his grasp in annoyance.
“He’s so fit.” You say simply and Lando glanced at the Harry character.
He’s sporting a funny looking beard now and there’s clearly been a time jump in the movie that Lando wasn’t paying attention to. He eyes the man dubiously before arching his brows at you.
“This guy?” His voice goes up an octave. “He looks like a nut.”
That makes you look at him, rolling your eyes in fond exasperation and something expands in Lando’s chest when he realises that he finally has your attention. If only for a brief moment. He thinks that it should probably concern him how needy he is to get your attention, but he can’t bring himself to care much.
“He does not!” Your voice goes high too, in indignation and it makes him stifle a smile. “You’re just jealous because he can grow a beard and you can’t.”
Now it’s Lando’s turn to look offended, smacking an open palm against his chest as if your words physically wounded him and it makes you smile despite yourself. You point your foot and jab your toe into his stomach softly.
“How fucking dare you.” He says with no real heat behind it, biting back a smile when you giggle. “My beard is scrumptious.”
“Scrum—“ You guffaw and throw your head back. “You call that a beard.”
“Oh, you better take that back.”
He sits up straighter now, gleeful that you’re not hushing him for speaking over the movie you’d quite literally seen a million times before. You retract your legs from his lap when you realise that he’s flexing his fingers dramatically, and you know what’s coming before he even makes a move.
“No— Oof.” The breath punches out of your lungs in a squeal when he jumps, landing painfully on you and it feels like he’s reached into your throat and pulled out your lungs when he starts tickling you.
The squeals of laughter triggers his giggling, and you know that you must look like a pair of maniacs as you squirm around on his bed with unintelligible words being screamed out between breathless laughter.
“Mercy! Mercy!” You yell, doing your utmost to kick him off but he only fights harder.
He’s clearly fully intent on making you pass out from the lack of oxygen and just when you’re about to buck him off with all your might, he stops.
There’s a moment where you pant, grinning at each other and he looks like an idiot as he looms above you; Hair in disarray and cheeks flushed. But you figure that you’re looking very much like him and the thought of it makes you giggle.
“Do you take it back?” He asks and it takes a second for you to understand what he’s talking about, shaking your head.
“Never.” You reply, as if he hadn’t just tickled you within an inch of your life.
You squirm when he tickles your sides, way more gentle than before and there’s uncontrollable laughter bubbling up your throat when he reaches a hand out to circle it around your neck. He digs his fingers in a little and you swear that the room spins for a moment as he stares down at you.
“Say that I have a better beard.” There’s a threat in his tone that makes you giggle nervously, placing your hands on his forearm in an attempt to keep him from reaching down to tickle your sides. “Say it.”
“I’m not a liar.” You grin up at him when he narrows his eyes playfully, the blues disappearing into slits and it looks so funny that you squirm to stop yourself from laughing.
He puts a little pressure around your throat and the feeling that zips down your spine shocks you, so much so that you buck your hips up in a poor attempt to get him off of you. But it only makes him press right against you and the unexpected hardness you feel makes you both pause.
“Are you…?” You trail off, looking between his eyes as his cheeks slowly turn pink. “Are you hard?”
“No?” He says a little too quickly and you purse your lips to keep the smile from your face. “Piss off.”
He’s quick to scramble off of you, sitting down next to you with a bounce on the mattress and you stare up at the ceiling in silence. Your heart is hammering a little too hard and you chance a glance at Lando to find him already looking at you. He averts his eyes and you smile.
“For the record…” You clear your throat when he inconspicuously grabs the nearest pillow and places it strategically in his lap. “You do have a nice beard.”
“Knew it.” He muttered, but there’s a ghost of a smile playing on his lips.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈
I can’t remember the last time I had this much fun writing a drabble. it’s been a while but we back baby!!
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Good Luck Charm: Chapter 20
college football player!buck x plus size!reader
summary: you go back to school early to attend a new year’s eve party.
word count: 3.5k
previous chapter
series masterlist
a/n: the last chapter!!! screaming crying throwing up fr. i’ll definitely post an epilogue though, and maybe some other short drabbles because i’m gonna miss them :// i also wanna thank everyone who reads this fic, i appreciate it so much!!! anyway, enjoy<3
warnings: a hint of smut, no use of y/n, fem!reader, plus size!reader, race inclusive!reader
MDNI- 18+ only!
Two long weeks later, it’s finally time for you and Evan to go back to school. You continued to sneak into Evan’s room each night, and had managed not to get caught each time his hands started to wander, innocent touches becoming something entirely different.
While you did tease him about keeping his hands to himself the first night, you were a little surprised when his hands traveled down your soft tummy and traced the waistband of your panties. You almost stopped him; the fear of getting caught clear in your mind, but your words were cut short when his hand dipped under the fabric and ghosted over your clit. His lips were on yours before you could make a sound, and when he finally pushed his cock into your dripping cunt, his lips were replaced with his hand as he whispered how good you were being into your ear.
This morning is no different. You wake up early; earlier than either of your parents, Evan’s bare chest against your back warming you up immensely.
“Are you sad to be leaving?” he whispers, his hot breath hitting the back of your neck. You hum softly, shrugging as you think about it. You turn in his grip before you answer, unable to fight back a smile as Evan’s face studies yours with a lovesick expression.
“I love my parents, but I think I get along with them better when we’re apart. Spending some time with them is nice, but I’m glad I’m not living here all the time.” you tell him in the same hushed tone. He nods, seeming to understand where you’re coming from. When he’s at school, sometimes his parents call to catch up, and he can almost pretend that he’s close with his parents when that happens.
“I’m glad. Because now we can go to the New Year’s party at Delta Phi.” he says in a teasing tone. You roll your eyes, laughing softly. He practically begged you to leave a couple of days early so you’d be back for the party once he found out that the theme of the party was to celebrate the university’s sports teams. “Now I can see you in my jersey again. Like old times.” is how he put it when he asked, and you couldn’t say no.
It had been a while since you were able to wear his jersey, and the last time you had, he ended up in the hospital, so a part of you was eager to get some better memories of wearing it.
“You really do like to party, don’t you?” you tease, laughing as he scoffs.
“Come on, they’re fun. You can’t tell me you didn’t like the parties I brought you to, other than the first one.” he says, his jaw clenching when he speaks about the first party you went to a party with him. He still has to see Jared at practice, but for the most part, Jared tries to steer clear of him, and he’s thankful. As much as he wants to fucking kill him for what he did, he knows that wouldn’t be the best idea.
“Alright, they’re not as bad as I thought they’d be. But that doesn’t mean I’d pick going to a party over, like, a movie night. But I like when you get all protective.” you tease, leaning in to kiss him softly. You can feel his fist clenching at your side, where he was holding your hip, and you know what he’s thinking about. You’ve stuck close to Evan at every party since then, and he always has to have a hand on you. Either an arm around your shoulder, or his hand in yours, or on the small of your back. He won’t let you leave his sight.
“Gotta protect my girl. Always.” he tells you earnestly, his hand unclenching as he lets out a breath. He knows he’s more upset about the situation than you are, even though it happened to you, but he can’t help it. He still feels a little guilty for even losing you in the first place.
“And you always do. From people and from the dark.” you tease, and he chuckles. Then in an instant, he moves to pin you to the bed, his body positioning itself between your legs, making you squeal softly in surprise as you giggle. He shushes you softly, lowering his face to the crook of your neck as his hands pin your wrists to the bed beside your head.
“Gotta be quiet, baby. I’ve gotten through two weeks without your dad hating my guts. Can’t start now.” he murmurs against your neck before beginning to trail kisses across your skin. You bite your lip as you tilt your head back, reveling in the feeling of his lips on you. Truth be told, your mom has caught you a couple of times in his room, not that either of you have been awake to notice. She stands near the door with a smile on her face each time, seeing you cuddled up together. She thinks it’s sweet, and she’d never tell your dad, anyway. This is not one of those mornings, evidently.
“We can’t have that.” you whisper, meeting his gaze as he pulls away from your neck. He smirks, moving your wrists up above your head and grabbing them with one hand, then his other moves down to push your shirt up over your plush tummy and chest.
Once your shirt is bunched up above your tits, his eyes trail down your body as he licks his lips. He’s so glad you only ever sleep with an oversized shirt and panties, like you’re just begging him to take care of you.
He leans down and gives you a short, but passionate, kiss, then moves down to your neck again. You bite your lip as his kisses move further down your neck, and he moves his face away for just long enough to move below your shirt, then begins to kiss down the valley of your breasts to your round tummy. He hums softly as he presses featherlight kisses to the skin littered with stretch marks, nipping and sucking softly as he goes.
He loves marking your tummy; he loves seeing the marks that are for his eyes only, and he likes the way it makes you squirm, but he also loves it seems to make you feel more confident. He loves your soft belly, and he’ll keep leaving marks across it until you love it completely, too.
His hands move down to your hips, grabbing and harshly pulling your panties down your legs with a low grunt, now leaning back on his knees to look at all of you.
“God, I love you.” he whispers once you’re left in nothing but your bunched up shirt, his fingers moving up your inner thighs.
You inhale a shaky breath as he leans down until his face is directly in front of your core. He smirks as he keeps eye contact with you, and the last thing he says before his tongue makes contact with your slick folds is “My gorgeous girl. I’m gonna ruin you.”
You get back to your apartment at around 6, which is still much earlier than when you have to go to the party, but after waking up early and driving all day, you feel like you need a nap before you get ready. Buck dropped you off, and after insisting on carrying your bags up for you, he gave you a sweet kiss and told you he’d be back around 10:00 before he went back to his place.
Your eyelids flutter open an hour or so later, and since you showered this morning, and you know you’ll probably get some form of alcohol spilled on you tonight, you don’t bother showering. Since you now have some time before Evan picks you up, you drag yourself out of bed and into the living room, flopping down onto the couch your roommate isn’t currently sprawled out on.
“How was your break?” she asks innocently, although her expression is anything but. She knows you brought Evan to meet your parents, and she has been patiently waiting since you left for any little detail of your visit. You didn’t want to tell her over text, so you kept telling her you’d update her when you got back. And since she got back four days before you did, she had begged you to tell her, claiming she was too bored and lonely all alone to wait.
“Well, my dad doesn’t hate him.” you tell her with a smile. She laughs, rolling onto her side to face you with a smirk.
“Tell me everything right now.” she urges, and you roll your eyes. She watches you intently as you begin to tell her, leaving out the parts about you sneaking into his bed every night, for the most part.
Just like promised, Evan buzzes your apartment intercom at 10pm, and your roommate lets him in, as you’re still finishing up your makeup. It’s nothing crazy, just some mascara and lip gloss, but you waited a little too long before you started to get ready; instead spending your time catching up with your roommate.
He walks into the bathroom, eyes trailing down your figure as you bend over the counter to touch up your lip gloss. You’re wearing your favourite pair of jeans and a white long sleeve shirt, knowing you’ll get cold in just Evan’s jersey on the walk to and from the party. You jump slightly in surprise as Evan lets out a low whistle, turning to see him leaning in the doorway. He’s wearing a white hoodie under his own jersey, and you can’t help your eyes traveling down to his broad chest. God, how did you get so lucky?
“You’re trying to kill me, aren’t you?” he asks in a teasing tone, closing the distance between you and dropping your jersey onto the counter before he pulls your hips against his. He meets your lips in a kiss, and you whine softly as you pull back, frowning.
“I just put on lip gloss.” you say, fighting back a smile as you look up at his lips, now shiny and glittery. You reach up and wipe it off with your thumb, and he chuckles softly once you pull your hand away.
“And you can put on some more. I wanna kiss you.” he tells you sternly, then leans in for another kiss.
“Your teammates are gonna make fun of you if you keep doing that. You’re gonna walk into the party with lip gloss all over your face.” you tease once you lean back again, but letting him kiss you for longer this time. You wipe off the lip gloss again, then push him away by putting your hands on his chest. He rolls his eyes, but lets you push him back, then watches you intently as you turn back to the mirror and fix your makeup.
Once you’re finished, you grab the jersey off the counter and throw it on, tucking one side into your jeans so it doesn’t look so awkwardly long.
“You ready, princess?” he asks once you turn to face him. You smile, nodding as you grab his hand and maneuver around him to lead him out of the bathroom. You meet your roommate near the door, ready to walk over with both of them. She’s going to the party anyway, and you’d rather her walk with you and Evan than walk over alone, even if she’s meeting some of her other friends there.
It’s a quick walk over, as your roommate is already a little drunk, and cannot seem to keep her mouth shut. You walk hand in hand with Evan as she walks in front of you, barely even paying attention as she rants on and on about the party.
“Is she gonna be okay once we get there? I kinda don’t want to leave her alone.” Evan whispers to you as she keeps talking. You look up at him, your heart swelling in your chest. You know he’s protective of you, but him being protective of your friend as well makes your heartbeat quicken.
“She’s meeting a few friends there; she should be fine. One of them is staying sober too, so she can keep an eye on her.” you tell him, and he nods slowly. Although this calms him, he still feels a little nervous about it.
“And, her friend’s boyfriend is on the lacrosse team. He said he’d keep an eye on them.” you tell him, and he nods, letting out a breath. That makes him feel a lot better.
“Yeah! He’s gonna set me up with a hot lacrosse player! It’s a sports party, and I don’t have a jersey. Gotta get one somewhere.” your roommate tells you as she turns her head to look over her shoulder at you two. You both let out laughs as she smirks and raises her brows a few times.
“I have faith in you.” Evan responds, and you roll your eyes, shaking your head. You watch as she turns on her heel and walks up to him, forcing you both to stop in your tracks. She raises a hand and puts it on his shoulder, looking up at him with a serious expression.
“You don’t know how much that means to me.” she says, swaying gently side to side. Evan furrows his brows as he lets out a confused laugh while you laugh loudly. Her head snaps to you as you laugh, then takes her hand off of Evan’s shoulder and puts it on yours.
“You’re so lucky you already have a jersey. I love you guys.” she tells you, then throws herself at you, wrapping her arms around your shoulders. You stumble back, shaking your head as you wrap your arms around her torso, hugging her back.
“Alright, let’s go get you that jersey.” Evan says in a teasing tone, making eye contact with you over your roommate’s shoulder. He winks at you as she finally pulls away, mumbling a quiet “good idea” as she turns and starts walking towards the party again.
The party is in full swing once you drop your roommate off with her friends and Evan says hi to a bunch of his teammates throughout the party. You’re staying close to Evan, getting jostled around as people sway to the music and shove their way through the crowd around you. He keeps his arm firmly wrapped around your shoulder, only letting you go when he grabs both of you a beer. You aren’t a huge fan of the taste, but you take it with a smile, figuring that you’d rather be a little buzzed and deal with the taste than have to endure the lights and noise around you sober.
Just like clockwork, Evan starts to get more handsy when he’s a few drinks in, keeping his front pressed against your back as he holds you close to him. His arms are firmly wrapped around your waist, and his chin is resting on your shoulder as he sways you back and forth with the music.
“Have I told you how good you look in my jersey?” he says in your ear, practically having to yell in order for you to hear him over the music. You laugh softly, rolling your eyes. You’ve had a few drinks, but you’re nowhere near drunk, not as drunk as him, and his clinginess makes your face heat up.
“Yeah, a couple times.” you respond in a teasing tone, turning in his grip to angle your face towards his. He grins, then leans down and gives you a sloppy kiss on your neck, mumbling a “good” as he does. You tilt your head to the side as he kisses you, grinning as you shake your head.
You continue to dance with him until it’s almost midnight, and you only stop when the party around you starts to feel even more chaotic, if at all possible. You turn in Evan’s grip, wrapping your arms around his neck once you’re face to face with him.
“Hi, baby.” he says over the music, and you giggle softly.
“Hi, my love. It’s almost midnight.” you reply, tilting your head to the side as he continues to sway you both back and forth.
“Yeah? What’s that thing people usually do at midnight, again?” he asks in a slightly teasing tone, then gives you a wink. You roll your eyes, shaking your head.
“I’m not sure, why?” you tease back, laughing more when he scoffs.
“I’m gonna kiss you so hard.” he says with a cocky tone, smirking. You rest your forehead on his chest as you laugh, closing your eyes. He’s such a dork when he gets like this, but you wouldn’t change it for the world.
“Whatever you say, baby.” you tell him once you look up at him again, a smile spreading across your face. He’s about to reply when everyone begins to countdown, and he grins, moving one hand up to your jaw, tilting your head up further.
“I love you.” he whispers right as the clock strikes midnight, and then he meets your lips in a searing kiss. You smile against his lips, hands gripping the front of his jersey as you rise onto your toes, momentarily forgetting that you’re in a room full of people, not that anyone notices, or cares.
You keep one arm around his torso as you both walk up the walkway to his house, his arm wrapped around your shoulder as he leans against you. You fish his keys out of his pocket and unlock the door, which proves difficult as Buck leans against you from behind, hands and lips attached to you, and finally get him to his room. You push him back onto the bed, and he falls back with a low grunt, then smirks as he sits up on his elbows.
“I like where this is going.” he says, licking his lips as he eyes your soft figure. You roll your eyes, then walk over to the edge of the bed, urging him to sit up. You pull his jersey and hoodie over his head in one go, and he raises his arms to help you as you do. You then grab his hands and pull him to stand in front of you, telling him to take off his pants so he can change into sweats to go to bed.
“What are you doing to me? I am not that kind of girl.” he tells you sternly, but his hands move to make quick work of the button and zipper of his jeans. You giggle, watching him pull his pants down and then lay down to let you pull them off of him completely.
“No? Not even for me?” you ask in a sweet voice, a smirk on your face. He shrugs, pursing his lips as he studies your face, then after a moment, a smile erupts on his face.
“Alright. Maybe for you.” he murmurs. You hum softly, then grab a pair of his sweatpants from his closet and toss them at him. He puts them on haphazardly, then stands up and reaches for the hem of the jersey across your chest. “Your turn.” he mumbles as he begins to pull your jersey and your long sleeve shirt up and over your head.
Once your shirts are off, his hands move to your jeans, tugging them down. He watches as you step out of them, and then he grabs your jersey off the bed and puts it back on over your head, humming softly as it falls down your body.
“Perfect.” he murmurs, then cups your cheeks with his hands and kisses you sloppily. You kiss him back, hands resting on his chest as you part your lips, and he eagerily pushes his tongue into your mouth. Once his hands start to wander, grabbing your ass and pushing you against him, you break the kiss, looking up at his puffy lips and blown pupils.
You push him away, muttering a soft “lets go to bed.” He exhales a loud sigh, but obliges, laying down on his back on the bed, and holding his hand out for you to take. You grab it and let him pull you down onto him, resting your cheek against his chest. Once you’re comfortably laying on him, and your leg is thrown over his legs, he sighs in contentment.
“I think I’m gonna keep you forever.” he drawls, his eyelids beginning to grow heavy as he feels his body sinking into the bed and his sheets enveloping him in warmth. You smile, humming softly.
“You better.” you whisper, and he squeezes your thigh softly in response. You can hear his breathing becoming more steady, and you can tell he’s almost asleep, but you speak once more before he falls asleep.
“I love you.” you whisper.
“You know I love you, princess.” he mumbles before sleep finally overcomes him.
next chapter
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brave
It’s been six months since Buck and Tommy had their first disastrous date, and it’s not a coincidence that Buck chose Micelli’s for their date tonight. The last week has been rough for them both, and Buck thinks that maybe revisiting where they started could do them both some good. It’s a reminder, if nothing else, that they weathered one storm and they can weather this one too.
It had started with an offhand comment, and before either of them knew it, it had snowballed into their first actual fight. Buck has had arguments with girlfriends before, but something about this one felt different, it felt real, like the stakes were somehow higher than they were in his previous relationships. Eventually, when it was clear that they weren’t getting anywhere, Buck had taken off and found himself at Eddie’s with a pack of beer and a bag of Eddie’s favourite Doritos.
“I just don’t get what his problem is,” Buck says, and then cracks open a bottle. “It’s like he saw the-the lease renewal papers he just – he just…”
“Just?” Eddie prompts, stuffing his face with chips. Buck decides against telling him about the crumbs and Dorito dust stuck in his moustache, figuring he’ll discover it eventually and in the meantime, Buck can quietly laugh about it without Eddie knowing. He deserves some form of entertainment after the night he’s had.
“He asked me to move in with him,” Buck grumbles before grabbing his own handful of chips just to have something to do with his hands. He ignores the way Eddie’s eyes go wide at the admission. “It was out of nowhere a-and I don’t know what to do with that, Eddie. I-I panicked and I said some things I probably shouldn’t have… and then I took off.”
“If you’re not ready to move in with him then just say that,” Eddie says, as if it was that simple. It wasn’t that simple, was the thing, and Buck doesn’t know how to articulate that to his best friend, let alone to Tommy. Buck must take too long to respond because when Eddie continues, he’s looking at Buck with a thoughtful, borderline suspicious expression. “Unless… you’re not-not ready?”
Tapping his knuckles on the wood of Eddie’s table, Buck looks everywhere but Eddie as he gathers his thoughts.
“I-I shouldn’t be ready, right? I mean, we’ve only been together for six months, that’s way too soon.”
“So, it’s not that you’re not ready, but that you think that you shouldn’t be ready?” Buck nods, feeling a little helpless as Eddie looks at him like he’s an idiot, and Buck sighs in frustration. “Okay, I don’t get it. What is this about? Because if you’re ready, and Tommy’s ready, then I’m not sure I see the what the problem is.”
“I just-it just…” Buck pauses, forcing himself to take a breath before continuing. “It came out of nowhere and it just seemed so sudden and I…”
It doesn’t matter that he can’t seem to get the words out, because Eddie has a look of understanding dawning on his face as if he’s suddenly just realized what this is about and Buck lets out a sigh of relief. He can always trust Eddie to understand what’s going on with Buck, if no one else.
“Taylor,” Eddie says, before taking a long draw from his beer.
“Taylor,” Buck repeats in agreement. When Tommy had asked if he’d like to move in, Buck had felt a sudden rush of excitement and he’d almost, almost agreed without thinking. But that excitement had quickly changed into the sharp sting of anxiety as he’d thought about how quickly he and Taylor had jumped into that milestone, and then how quickly it had all fallen apart. Standing there, looking at Tommy, he hadn’t been able to stop worrying that they had an expiration date, and that this move would be the first step towards the end just like it had been with Taylor.
“Listen,” Eddie starts, and Buck knows that tone, it’s the same tone he used when telling Buck not to give up on something before he’d even known what it was before encouraging him to call Tommy. “You and Tommy are not you and Taylor, not even close. And if you’re really not ready for that step then that’s okay, and you need to tell Tommy that. I’m sure he’d understand. But if you are, and you’re just not letting yourself because of a previous bad experience then you need to figure out how to let that go before it hurts something that could be really good for you.”
He’s right, and Buck knows he’s right. He and Tommy have been doing so well together and Buck hates to admit that there’s been this part of him all along that’s just been waiting for the other shoe to drop, for Tommy to come to the decision that maybe they’re just better off as friends. “You don’t think it’s too soon?” Buck asks quietly into his drink.
“I think that what’s too soon for some people is just right for others, and only you and Tommy get to decide what’s right for the two of you.” He’s speaking from experience, and Buck experiences a sudden pang of guilt at the reminder of Marisol and what led to Eddie blowing up his life.
Agreeing to give it some more thought, Buck decides to change the topic as a bit of sadness creeps over Eddie’s face. Without another word, Buck moves their location to the living room and puts on one of the telenovelas Eddie likes, and they both settle in for the night.
Eventually, Buck and Tommy had spoken, and had agreed to table talks of moving in together for the time being. Tommy hadn’t understood why Buck had reacted the way he had, and Buck wasn’t sure how to explain that thoughts of moving in together exhilarated and terrified him at the same time. He especially didn’t know how to explain that it’s thoughts of his ex-girlfriend that have him feeling so anxious.
But now that some distance has been put between the fight, and Buck’s had some time to think things through, he knows what he wants. And while things still weren’t quite back to normal between them, Tommy having pulled back slightly since the argument, they’re still them and Buck wants to celebrate that.
“Brings back memories,” Tommy quips once they’re settled into their table. When Buck made the reservation, he’d specifically requested this table, wanting to recreate their original date as much as possible. Hopefully with a much different ending this time.
“Yeah, uh, that’s why I chose it, actually.” Buck feels his face heat slightly at the admission as he glances up at Tommy. He hates that Tommy still looks a little guarded around him, hopes that he can erase that look with what he plans to say. “I thought maybe we could, I-I don’t know, paint over the old memories with new ones?”
That gets him a fond smile before Tommy looks down at the menu, shaking his head before he looks back up. “You’re adorable,” he says, voice soft and fond and Evan feels himself relax slightly at the glimpse of warmth there.
“You said that last time.”
“I meant it then, too.” Another smile, and Buck feels himself melt a little more.
The waiter appears then, and they put in their orders. Instead of sharing a pizza this time they order individually; Buck orders himself the gnocchi, and Tommy choosing the Chicken Parmigiana. Conversation is light as they wait for their food, Bobby is finally back in the captain’s seat which means that Buck is happy to talk about the goings on at the 118 and Tommy is always happy to listen. Tommy tells him about his last shift in turn, about the helicopter rescue of the missing hiker that could’ve gone wrong but didn’t thanks to Tommy and Lucy’s quick thinking, and for the first time since their fight, Buck feel sat peace.
This is what he wants, he thinks as their food arrives, him and Tommy. Whether they’re at a fancy restaurant or lazing about on Tommy’s couch, Tommy is where he feels content and happiest. There’s only two other people who’ve ever made him feel truly at ease and one of them is his sister, and the other is Eddie, and that he gets to count Tommy among that group fills him with so much warmth Buck thinks he could burst with it.
Only you and Tommy get to decide what’s right.
Eddie’s words come back to him as silence settles over the table while they dig into their food. He’s right, six months, twelve months, whatever, they’re all just arbitrary numbers and Buck is tired of letting his past dictate what feels right, right now. They’re nearly finished their meals when Buck sets down his fork with a soft clink, deciding it’s now or never.
“Tommy I uh, I wanted to-”
“—Wait, let… let me go first Evan,” Tommy says, cutting Buck off. “Look, last week I put you on the spot and that wasn’t right.”
“No, Tommy, I-”
Tommy raises a hand, as though silently asking Buck to let him finish and Buck’s mouth snaps closed. “It wasn’t fair to you, is what I’m trying to say, and neither was my reaction when you weren’t ready for that conversation.” He lets out a weary sigh and Buck wants nothing more than to reach across the table and pull him in for a tight hug, but he can tell Tommy has more he wants to say and thinks that maybe he wasn’t the only one who has been stewing on the events of last week. “When I saw that your lease renewal was coming up I just – I knew that I didn’t want to have to wait another year for you to move in with me. I got ahead of myself, and when you didn’t seem on board, I let myself get in my head about it, and I took it out on you and I shouldn’t have.” Tommy pauses there and takes a sip of his wine before continuing. “You’re incredible, Evan, and I think I just got so caught up in how quickly we’ve tackled every other stage of this relationship that I assumed this would be the same, but it’s okay if it’s not. I love you, and you needing more time before we consider that step doesn’t change that, okay?”
Once finished, Tommy reaches across the table to cover Buck’s hand in his own and Buck feels himself let out a long, steady breath. There’s so many different things flying through his head that he struggles to grasp onto one coherent thought. Eventually, he’s able to settle on the one that matters most, which is that he loves this man, quickly followed by the fact that he’d almost said yes that night, before he’d let his fear get the better of him.
“I didn’t renew my lease,” Buck blurts out, knowing that he should’ve started with literally anything else but that’s what came out and he can’t exactly take it back now.
“Evan,” Tommy says, eyes wide, and a memory of Tommy saying his name in that exact same tone flashes through Buck’s memory, only that time they’d been outside and Buck had gotten Tommy’s coffee order wrong.
“I um, I wanted to say yes, when you asked,” Buck starts, picking up the fork that he’d previously put down and fiddling with it as nervous energy rushes through him. “I was going to, a-and then, well, I got in my head a little too? The last person I moved in with, it um, it fell apart, and we’d moved in sort of early in the relationship and I just… I got scared.” He’s talking to his plate now, face heating as he feels Tommy’s hand squeeze over his. “I love you,” he says, turning his hand palm up underneath Tommy’s and squeezing back. “I loved her too, o-or I thought I did, at least, and it still fell apart. I just didn’t want that to happen with you.”
“Evan,” Tommy says again, slightly breathy as he looks at Buck with a warmth that Buck sometimes thinks is reserved just for him.
“But I-I realized that I can’t let that stop me from having what I want now, and what I want, Tommy, is to be with you.”
“Evan, are you sure?” Tommy asks, sounding a little disbelieving, and Buck can’t exactly blame him after the abrupt one-eighty he’s done.
“Yes, I am, i-if the offer is still on the table.” He really hopes it is because he wasn’t lying about choosing not to renew his lease. He could probably talk to the landlord if needed, they have a good relationship, and Buck is sure he’d prefer to keep things as is over having to search for a new tenant. But still, he’s really hoping he won’t need to do that.
“Of course it’s still on the table,” Tommy says emphatically, looking a little dazed.
Before Buck can answer they’re interrupted by their waiter checking in on them and offering dessert. Neither of them has to think very long about it before they’re ordering a slice of carrot cake to share. He feels giddy as they exchange excited glances over their shared cake.
“So, about my couch…” Buck says when they’re about halfway through their cake, trailing off as he lets the sentence hang there. They’d been discussing the finer points of Buck moving in with Tommy but had yet to address furniture.
“I seem to recall you making a big deal in the past about my couch being your favourite,” Tommy responds with a grin. “But-” he interrupts Buck before he can retort, holding up a hand, “as you already know, I have been working on finishing the basement. If you bring your set over, then that just means we won’t need to buy new furniture. Win-win.”
“I like the way you think,” Buck agrees. Grinning, Buck takes another bite of cake, not missing the way Tommy eyes his mouth as he slides the spoon out from between his lips.
Tommy takes a bite of his own, and then gives a mournful look to the near empty plate. “We should have ordered two slices,” he says with a mournful sigh.
Laughing, Buck pushes the plate towards Tommy, offering him the last of it. “We could always just order another to go,” he suggests. “There was an apple spice cake that sounded really good.”
Tommy seems to seriously consider it as he savours the last bite of their shared carrot cake before he shakes his head and looks up at Buck. “Mm, no, I think I’m going to be hungry for something else when we get home.”
Buck feels his breath hitch at the low tone coupled with the sudden heat of Tommy’s gaze. And well, Buck can definitely get on board with that, is always up for it the second Tommy so much as looks in his direction. But still- “Tommy Kinard? Turning down cake? It’s like I don’t even know you,” he teases, unable to help himself.
“Baby,” he says, voice husky as he leans forward over the table, “I think you’ve misunderstood. No one said anything about turning down cake. I’ve just decided I want an entirely different variety… one not offered on restaurant menus.” He gives Buck a wink before he sits back and flags down their waiter for their check and Buck… Buck thinks he’s going to have trouble walking out of this restaurant without embarrassing himself. Tommy eyes him as he pays the bill, the corner of his mouth lifting in a smug smirk as he stands from his seat. “You coming, babe?”
Not yet, he thinks, but definitely later. “I um, yeah, yes,” he says before clumsily getting out of his seat, hip knocking into the sharp corner of the table. Tommy’s laugh fills the space between them and Buck wishes he could bottle it because it’s quickly becoming his favourite sound.
As they leave the restaurant he looks over at Tommy, who’s grinning back at him and has the realization that he gets to have this. The laughter and the belonging and the bone deep love that he feels, he gets to have it, it’s his to keep if he’s brave enough to take it.
Standing next to Tommy, it’s easy to feel brave.
Link
#bucktommy#tevan#kinkley#fox writes#unbeta'd#just a quick little fic i wrote tonight#based on info we've gotten from interviews
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Hmm something about Buck being reckless and ending up in the hospital with Tommy by his side. Buck can tell Tommy is fuming- but he doesnt show it- he just keeps a hand ontop of Evan’s , rubbing it absentmindedly as he listens to the steady sounds of the heart monitor.
They get Tommy’s house- Evan’s house now too. and he just cant take it anymore. He cant take the angry silence so he snaps- its unfair and he knows it but he just.
—
“I’m sorry it’s an inconvenience to take care of me.”
Tommy paused, dropping Evan’s bag on the floor
“Is that why you think I’m mad?”
Evan scoffed, like it was the most obvious answer in the world. “Yeah. What else?”
God. Fuck. Tommy wanted to strike down whoever instilled such- self deprecation into Evan’s mind.
“Evan.” Tommy breathed out, trying his hardest to not sound mad, he failed.
“That’s not why I’m mad at you. Im not even- I’m not even mad I’m just..”
“Disappointed?” Evan mocked, he knew it was shitty- but the pain medication had worn off and he was looking for something to be upset with- to deflect how he was really feeling.
“Very funny.” Tommy sighed, but continued regardless “I’m scared. Yes fine I’m disappointed too but its- I don’t think you understand.”
“Well then enlighten me.” Evan crossed his arms, he was looking for a fight and Tommy was trying his best to avoid one.
“Would you just stop-“ almost- Tommy almost gave in and bit back- but he stopped himself. “God damn it Evan I’m trying here- I’m trying. But you scared me. I dont want to be mad at you- I don’t want you feel worse than you already do but why did you have to be so reckless!?”
“Its apart of the job. We get hurt. I thought being a firefighter yourself you would understand that.” Evan bit back.
“No- no that is NOT apart of the job- being reckless and running into an a burning building without proper equipment is stupid!” Tommy groaned- mentally scolding himself for losing his composure. “I know youre going to get hurt. IM going to get hurt.” He said more calmly “I’m upset because you could’ve died Evan- do you even care? Because I do! Howie- Hen- Eddie - Bobby? Your sister? We all care!” Tommy’s standing in front of Buck, who is now resting on the couch- his gaze fixated on the floor.
“I did what was right Tommy. I saved someone.”
“But what about yourself?” Tommy frowned “youre selfless Evan- and I love that about you. I-I’m the selfish one here because I sometimes.. I wish you werent.”
Evan looked up at him but didnt say anything, so Tommy continued.
“I love you, Evan. I’m upset because you scared me. I thought I lost you for good and you didnt even seem to care. Just another near miss for you- but for me? It was fucking terrifying okay?”
Evan blinked, like he hadn’t considered that reasoning before. “Oh.” He thought a long time about what to say, before taking a deep breath and nodding. “I promise to cut back on the daredevil stuff okay..?”
“No- Evan I just..” Tommy sighed and sat down next to him, taking his hands. “I dont want you to stop being you- I just.. want you to know that.. I love you. And I would really appreciate you coming home to me. So don’t.. dont stop being brave and selfless just- just remember you have someone waiting at home- someone who needs.. you to fight to get back to. Okay?”
Evan smiled “yeah. Okay.”
#911 abc#tommy kinard#evan buckley#bucktommy#buck 911#tevan#evan buck buckely#kinkley#fanfic#bucktommy fic
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Darkness and Sunshine (2)
Summary: Bucky hurt you deeply. Can he make amends?
@buckybarnesevents „Hot Bucky Summer 2024”: Week 13: Free Week
Pairing: Mobster!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Reader
Warnings: angst, hurt reader, BBF trope, attentively Bucky, flirting, fluff
Catch up here: Darkness and Sunshine
“You will keep your hands off my sister.” It’s the first time you’ve heard your brother yell at his friend and business partner. “You had your chance and hurt her. Stop coming up with more excuses for your poor life choices. Y/N had nothing to do with any of it. You wanted her to come with me all the time, only to break her heart.”
Your brother is panting. No man ever got away with insulting James Buchanan Barnes. Most of the people didn’t even get the chance to confront him face-to-face.
“Y/B/N, I’m telling you this as a friend. Stop right now. I had my reasons to push your sister away. I know it was wrong, but I had to keep her out of my life and my business.” Bucky balls his metal hand into a fist and slams it onto the desk at his office. “I let you get away with talking like that to me because you love your sister. But that is enough.”
Your brother huffs. “Do you think I care?” He replies. “We have been friends all my life, but hurting my sister was one step too far. I’m telling you one last time to leave her alone!”
Bucky steps closer to your brother, making you flinch. You are sitting on the sofa in his office, watching the two most important men in your life fight because of you.
“Please stop,” your voice cracks, seeing your brother so mad at his friend. “It’s my fault, Y/B/N. I shouldn’t have fallen in love with your friend. Let’s just go home, and I’ll never come back here.”
Turning his head like in slow motion, his lips curved into a grin, Bucky looks at you sitting on his sofa. “You love me?”
“Barnes.” your brother raises his voice to catch Bucky’s attention. “Don’t you dare to even think about it! I won’t allow you to hurt my sister again.”
Bucky rolls his eyes at your brother’s words. He understands that Y/B/N tries to protect you, but he’s too stubborn to admit that your brother has all the right to be mad at him.
“I won’t hurt her, Y/B/N. You know, all I did was protect her. It was you asking me to protect her at all costs,” Bucky snaps at your brother, making you frown. Your brother never told you that Bucky agreed to protect you.
“As if I’ll trust you with her ever again, Buck,” your brother bites back. “You have no clue what love is or how to make a woman stay. All you ever did was change your girlfriends like other men change their underwear.”
“So... every four or five days,” you giggle because both men stare at you. “What?” You shrug. “I once read an article about how often men change their underwear.”
Your brother can see the twinkle in your ear. You hold back a chuckle before bursting into laughter. “Okay, it was on Reddit, and I asked the crowd. My ex didn’t change his underwear daily, and I was wondering if that was normal.”
“What a pig!” Bucky scrunches up his nose. He retches while looking at your brother. “Punk, don’t tell me you do the same thing.”
“Hey, don’t look at me. The ladies like a clean lower area,” your brother grumbles under his breath.
“Lower area?” You laugh even harder. “Y/B/N, you know that you can call it dick in front of me, right? I have seen one or two in my life.”
Bucky’s features darken. The thought of someone else touching you makes him furious. Deep down inside, Bucky knows that he’s got no right to feel like this. Well, he had the chance to ask you out more than once over the years. He always came up with excuses, only to watch another man hold your hand.
“Y/N, be a doll and leave me and your brother alone for a while. Please.” Bucky’s voice softens when talking to you. “How about you get a snack or a beverage?”
“No,” you harrumph, and you cross your arms over your chest. “Why would I do that? I won’t let you or my brother decide what to do with my life. You know what? I’ll leave you alone and go home.”
You get up from the couch and walk straight toward the door. Even if Bucky regrets all the things he said that night, they still echo in the back of your mind. You’re too hurt to just sit there and listen to them make decisions for you.
Bucky and your brother didn’t part on good terms. Your brother told his friend to stay away from you, while Bucky refused to give in. Seeing you with John Walker woke something more than his protective side.
“Doll, open the door. It’s me, Bucky. Your brother and I talked things out. Y/B/N sees now that he cannot stop me from dating you.”
“Dating me?” You angrily say this and open your door. He swallows thickly when you glare at him. You’re always friendly and a ray of sunshine. But today you give him not only the cold shoulder but the stinky eye too.
“You made it clear that you’d never date me, Mr. Barnes. Even if my date with John wasn’t successful, I decided to go out with other men more often. I should try to find a man who won’t act like a fool to keep me safe.”
Bucky leans against your doorframe, watching you stand your ground against him. He’s impressed you didn’t melt in his arms or give him that sweet smile he hasn’t seen since he made the stupidest mistake of his life.
“Doll…” He sighs when you pull away the moment he tries to touch your hand. “What if I invite you for dinner in Paris or let me buy you this pretty dress you told Tasha about?”
You pout and look away. “Your money and shiny things won’t make up for what you did to me. Whatever you do, you can’t buy my love.”
Bucky nods. He can see the change in you and doesn’t like it. What he always loved about you was your optimism and the fact that you’re a ray of sunshine. Now you look sad most of the time he’s around. The powerful man dips his head to glance inside your apartment. For so many years, he has known you and your brother without entering your place a single time.
He furrows his brows, thinking hard to come up with a new plan. The private plane waiting for departure won’t impress you, and neither will the gifts he bought for you.
“I thought about a walk in the park,” he says, instead of offering the diamond necklace he bought for you this morning. “The weather is nice, and I’d hate to go alone. Please come with me, Y/N. We can have some ice cream later.“
A walk in the park and ice cream. This sounds like a normal date. Even though you never know when it comes to James Buchanan Barnes.
“Please don’t leave me hanging.”
“No catch?” You question, quirking a brow.
“No catch,” he says, offering a smile and his hand. “I swear on my sister’s life, doll. I’ll be a perfect gentleman.”
You place your hand in his before you say, “I’ll keep you up on that promise, Bucky.”
Tags in reblog.
#hotbuckysummer2024#bucky barnes events#bucky barnes#mafia au#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#Darkness and Sunshine (2)
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pretty in pink
f!reader x yeosang smut | mdni 1k your boyfriend just thinks pink suits you very much and loves to make you blush by all means nsfw tags under the cut
#8: mutual masturbation (twt p☆rnlink) established relationship, switch(ish) bf!yeosang (he's a menace), begging, fingering (f), hand job, yeosang's low voice (ugghhh i'm weak), yeosang's veiny forarms (yes this needs a warning), slight spit kink, orgasms (f&m), praising (f&m), pet names (sangie, princess, baby, sweetheart)
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Yeosang has always liked that skirt on you. It was his favourite, maybe it was the colour. You wore pink beautifully. Maybe that was why he loved making you blush so much. You just looked cute like that and he couldn’t get enough.
“Please Sangie~” you whined, pushing your hips forwards onto his hand while you kneeled beside him in bed.
“Please what?” Yeosang asked with a radiating smile that was his specialty, a smile that was the embodiment of benevolence. But how far from the truth that was.
“Just do the… thing…” you said, trying your best not to sound too desperate as you pushed your groin into his hand again.
“What do you mean, princess? I don’t understand” your boyfriend said, feigning innocence. You sighed in frustration as his fingers wouldn’t respond underneath you.
“You know!! Stop teasing me!” you pouted. Then finally right as you were about to give up, you felt him circle his thumb lightly on your clothed clit. You gasped and frowned at the sudden but tamed pleasure you felt.
“Why would I, princess?” Yeosang’s deep baritone voice whispered, lifting goosebumps on your skin. “Why would I when you look so cute blushing in this pink skirt for me?” He applied more pressure making you stifle a moan and hide your face away with the back of your hand.
“No~~” Yeosang said, lifting his other hand to your arm. “Don’t cover your pretty face, baby. I wanna see your pretty pink skirt, your pretty pink face and your pretty pink pussy” he said, pushing your white panties to the side, to swipe his thumb on your bare wet cunt.
“Sangie~” you said, fighting the urge to cover your face again.
“Shhh, baby. I got you, sweetheart. Look at that!” Yeosang sucked in a breath as he laid eyes on your bare folds, glistening and twitching with need and anticipation. “So fucking wet and pretty. All for me, princess?”
“Yes!! yesyesyes all for you, Sangie. Only you” you huffed, bucking your hips into his hand as his thumb rubbing directly onto your bare cunt, his fingers parting your folds to smear your slick over your sensitive clit.
“Good girl” he said looking up at you with a fond smile while he pulled down his sweatpants and boxers to free his hard length from its restraints.
“Like this baby?” he asked as he applied more pressure to your sensitive bundle of nerves, circling it with expertise and making you throw your head back. “You like it like that?”
“Yess, l-like that. P-please don’t stop” you begged as you wrapped both hands around his thick veiny forearm as a way of ensuring he wasn't going anywhere. Because you need him. SO bad you needed him right.
“Of course, princess. But aren’t you forgetting something though?” he guided one of your hands off his arm and to his length that instantly jumped into your hand on contact. Instinctively your fingers wrapped around the base of his girth as you started to pump him loosely into your fist. The almost unbearable pleasure you were feeling kept you too distracted for the task.
“Come on baby, you can do better than that.” Yeosang cooed, wrapping your hands more firmly around him. “Or do you want me to stop?” he threatened and that was enough to encourage you.
“No! please!” you said instantly holding him tighter in your fist and dragging your hand to his cockhead to gather the precum and drag it back down.
“Yeah that’s right. Spit on it baby” he huffed, his hips jerking in your hands as he picked up the pace once more. You leaned over him and spat a big warm wad right in his tip, earning a pleased sigh from your boyfriend. “Fuck yeah baby. Keep going” his low toned voice encouraged you while you kept on jerking him off, your hips rolling onto his hand working its magic on your throbbing wet cunt.
“Yes baby you’re doing so good for me” Yeosang breathed as his eyes fluttered close and a deep crease dug itself between his beautiful brows. “Goddamn baby… fuck” his voice strained as you felt his thighs tense up and his cock twitch in your hand.
“Please Sangie. Please cum for meee” you whined, feeling yourself inching closer to your high.
“Yeah baby” his raspy voice whispered, saturated with bliss. “Yeah baby make me fucking cum.”
Suddenly he inserted two fingers inside you while his thumb was pressing hard on your swollen clit.
“Oh m-my… ffffuck… Sang-..ie” You tensed up your legs rutting harder on his hand fucking yourself on his fingers.
“Fuckkkk baby… y-yes like that I’m c-cumming… fuck… cumming for you, princess” Yeosang said through gritted teeth, his fat cock twitching in your hand as he spurted big ropes of thick slimy cum right onto his abs and your hand. Just as you were also reaching Heaven’s doors. Suddenly your hips became sloppier and you threw your head back letting a throaty moan escape your lips while your walls gripped on your boyfriend’s fingers hungrily and fluttered around him. White heat radiated from your core to your chest and limbs, flooding your brain with pleasure until your hand and hips came to a stop and you rolled off Yeosang’s arm, short-breathed and euphoric.
“Fuck baby you were so good” Yeosang praised you as he brushed off some whispies out of your face and kissed your temple.
“Thank you Sangie” you said with a shy smile before Yeosang pecked your lips.
“But I’m not done with you. Lemme wipe up real quick and I’ll make you see stars”
a/n: i had so much fun writing this one too!! i hope you guys enjoy it!
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taglist: @aaaaajonghooooo @luvt0kki @mingisprincesss
#yeosang smut#ateez smut#yeosang x reader#yeosang#yeosang ateez#yeosang imagines#ateez#atz#kang yeosang#yeosang hard hours#yeosang hard thoughts#yeosang fanfic#ateez fanfic#yeosang x you#kpop smut#3k celebration
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hi babeeee!!! idk if this is how requests work bc i never request fics but i was wondering if u could do something super duper angsty, like really angsty, and then hurt comfort with a fluffy end? it can be anything you want, but like that sort of timeline would be so so so good, if u could and if requests r open,, xoxoxox
it may have taken me 12 years but i did it bestie.
Peter Parker wasn’t the type of boyfriend to have rules.
You were your own person, and should live as one. However, there were some things he was a bit more passionate about.
Like: texting him when you get home (and he wasn’t around), calling him if you feel unsafe or nervous, keep him informed of your whereabouts so he could try and track you down if he needed to, and always, always, call him back.
Peter had one rule, let him know you're safe. Always. Even when you’re mad at eachother, even at your most ugly, you’d let him know you’re okay. It was Peter’s one true rule, the other things he liked and he preferred you’d do, but this was his number one thing.
And you’re not following it.
The third time you ignored his call he felt frustration brew so deeply he almost slammed his phone to the ground, it would’ve done nothing to fix anything, and would’ve made a bigger problem, but the satisfaction of watching something break apart into a million pieces would’ve made him feel better. Even if just for a moment.
It’s almost like you knew it’s pissing him off, you’ve never dug this deeply into a wound. You knew it would get under his skin in the right places, it was something that either of you didn’t play with. It was too serious for Peter, and knowing you were most likely safe and just doing this to try and get even with him made him furious. Because he can’t prove it. And because he can’t all he could think about how not okay you might be.
Peter hates leaving angry voicemails but he can’t stop himself this time.
‘This is the fourth fucking call you’ve ignored, I think you proved your point. I know you’re mad at me but this is just childish, you made this night go from a small hiccup to a massive fight because you won’t answer your phone. Just call me back, goddamn it.’
Peter’s never once gotten loud with you, he’s never once felt enough rage towards you he could ever buck up enough energy to yell at you. But all he wanted to do was scream about how inconsiderate you were. He understands he may have started it, he even tried to apologize but you must’ve had this in your heart for a minute because you couldn’t wait to bulldoze him.
‘I’m so sorry, baby. I got caught up in the low-’
‘Whatever, I don’t care. I’m going home.’
‘Hey, no, no, no! We can still hang out! I haven’t ate-’
‘I did. I waited over an hour, Peter. I’m going home.’
‘I’m sorry, I really am, baby. I know tonight was important to you.’
And that’s when the night switched.
‘No, Peter, this wasn’t important to me. This was important for us, this was about you trying to prove you still care about us.’
‘Woah, hold on, don’t you dare stand there and tell me I don’t care about you or us, that’s unfair and you know it.’
‘You know what, Peter? I didn’t sign up to date two guys. I was willing to accept the other because it was a package deal, but I’m tired of being picked last. You know I’ll always be waiting around and it’s so fucking tiresome just waiting around.’
‘Bullshit. You knew exactly what you were signing up for, you don’t get to act like this is new news.’
‘I’m always picked last! I understand who you are, Peter, who you share a life with, trust me, if anyone here knows best about understanding, it’s fucking me, but that doesn’t mean I’m always the last priority. I know sometimes I have to be on the backburner, and guess what, Peter? I fucking understand. But, tonight? What stopped you? Because it’s not like there’s a domestic attack on the city, so tell me, what was so fucking important tonight I was shot to the bottom of the list for it?’
‘Okay, I get it. I know you’re mad, but I think we both need to take a breath and talk about this at home.’
‘No! I want you to look at me and tell me what was so important NYPD’s finest couldn’t handle it for an evening.’
‘Baby, I really don’t-’
‘Fucking tell me! I want you to admit right now it was nothing important. Look me in the eye and admit you didn’t care about my feelings.’
‘It was a robbery. I have a responsibility to keep the city safe, a city you very much live in, by the way.’
‘Ah, the classic, ‘if you really think about it, I’m doing this for you’ line. Real original.’
‘Can we please just go home? If you’re going to be pissed at me anyways I’d rather it be in the comfort of our home.’
‘You can go wherever you want, but I’m not going anywhere with you.’
‘I’m gonna get a cab, hold on.’
‘No, I’m not going anywhere with you and I mean it.’
‘You can hate me at home, let’s go.’
‘No! I’m leaving, you can sit around waiting on me for once.’
‘Why are you doing this now? You’ve never been this persistent before, I moved in with you and you still don’t think it’s enough. What else do you want from me? I’m giving you all I can, fuck.’
‘You know what? I hope someone fucking kidnaps me, maybe then I’d be your first choice.’
‘Don’t, don’t you even dare go there. You know that’s a low blow.’
‘I do. I hope I’m fucking tortured with you on the line, too.’
Peter tried calling out for you, screamed your name even, but you walked across the street and were swallowed into the crowd. He tugged at his hair a few times before looking around, he wasn’t sure what to do. Get a cab, bus, train? Does he walk in the direction you went? It’s a start.
Pulling out his phone he tried calling, you sent him to voicemail on the second ring. You’re pissed, that’s fine, he just needs you mad and safe. Peter dodged bodies on his left and right, checking each alleyway for you, assuming you’d stop to collect yourself and call him when you had a breather.
No sight of you. He doesn’t know where you went from here, it splits two ways. He tries using his boyfriend intuition and attempts to channel you, he’s left hopeless. Like a hail mary he remembers you share locations, Peter’s hands shake when he reaches for the app, your name loading until a small circle appears in his.
You’re close. He follows the road forward, he knows you took this way and his heart squeezes. You deliberately took the sketchy route, the one you told Peter you wouldn’t dare walk without him. It looks like he’s getting closer, but it’s impossible to tell when he has to wait for it to constantly reload.
Peter swears he can see your jacket ahead, he calls your phone, picking up the pace and trying his best to catch up. You blocked his call again, but he saw you do it.
He knows you heard your name get called, because you started to walk faster, it’s useless, Peter’s quicker. The only option you had was to hide in the crowd, squeezing yourself in the middle and out through the front. Sighing heavy at your escape, and a bit unamused by the childish behavior. Peter looked down at his phone refreshing your name ‘find friends.’
His face crumbled into a thousand pieces when the notification appeared, ‘- stopped sharing their location with you.’ His response was to call you, this time you let it ring out, and he left a nasty voicemail. It was like he snapped, he pulled at his curls and exhaled a loud ‘fuck!’ before gripping his phone so tight he thought it’d snap, and that's why he put it away.
If you wanted to play dirty so could he, you’re hard to find from the street but when he’s swinging from building to building you’d be out of luck. He was tired and hungry, he wanted this to be over. Fight about it like grown adults, at home, while he’s making a grilled cheese or something.
Peter ran down a back alleyway, ripping his clothes from his body and pulling his mask from his pocket. The suit came in handy tonight after all. Taking a sharp inhale, he took a leap, screaming out when he took flight.
‘Not you, not you, not you, not…. You? No, not you.’
‘Where the fuck did you go?’
You were nowhere to be found, still no answer on his calls or texts. He knows it’s irrational, but he’s terrified you’ve jinxed yourself and really are in trouble. He’s taken the route on a spin three times and he still hasn’t seen you, there’s three options, you either went into a gay nightclub, were kidnapped, or somehow snuck your way across the road and into… central park.
Of course you did, Peter should’ve known that. He told you one time it was a weak vantage point, he couldn’t see through the treelines all that well, and didn’t have much to swing from. At least he has a general idea of where you are, he just has to do it on foot.
Maybe you were right, maybe he just sucked at prioritizing you now. He doesn’t know when he became this way. He just feels so responsible, he got a great gift and it’s only right he shares it. He just hasn’t figured out how to share Peter with you and Spider-Man with the world yet. Both people need him at the same time.
At last, sitting on the edge of the fountain, is the love of his life. Just looking terribly sad, he hates to know he caused it. He may have started the fight, but you said some terrible things, things that were only said to jab at the most vulnerable spots.
Taking a seat next to you he sighs, his entire body deflating in one breath. You mimic the sigh.
“Rough night?”
You hum, “my boyfriend and I got in a fight. Maybe we still are, I don’t know. What about you?”
Peter stretches his legs, red feet scrape the brick. “My girlfriend went nuclear, kinda deserved. But, she also really hurt my feelings.”
“Did you hurt her feelings too?”
“Does that make it deserved?”
Silence. It didn’t.
Peter watches you twiddle your thumbs, chewing on your bottom lip and sniffing.
“I’m sure she’s really sorry, and she knows whatever she said hit a soft spot. It seems like your job comes with some downsides, and maybe she kept it all bottled up until she couldn’t anymore, because how do you tell a superhero you want their attention more than a city needs protection?”
He knows what you mean, he knows how selfish it could sound, but it’s not. You’re allowed to want him around every second, because he does too.
“You don’t.”
Peter can feel your eyes, “you don’t tell the superhero, you tell your boyfriend.”
Your throat clears, “what if he’s both? What if he’s already spread too thin and his whining girlfriend is his last straw?”
“No. He’s not spread too thin. He was unaware of how you felt, he didn’t know how much it bothered you. He didn’t know how far he pushed you away.”
“So what changes now he knows?”
Peter breaks character, this is about real solutions.
“We figure it out. We’ll go home and look at our schedules and work around it, and have a set day where it’s only us. Twice a month we’ll have a standing date, attendance mandatory. The police scanner gets turned off unless it’s a slow night, and from now on, unless it’s a domestic attack, nothing comes before you.”
#peter parker x reader#peter parker blurb#tasm! peter parker x reader#tasm!peter x reader#peter parker angst#tasm!peter angst#my writing
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I Wish (Evan Buckley x 118!Reader)
word count: 965
warnings: angst, fire
You started dating Buck only 5 months into working at the 118. He was so sweet and flirty, you instantly swooned over him. Not just his blue eyes, beefy build, and bright smile, but his passion for the job and care for others. As a probie, he unnecessarily would help you carry equipment that was on the heavier side even though you were more than capable of carrying it. He would save you a seat next to him at the dinner table and even serve your plate for you. You needed a napkin? Buck was already receiving a stack for you. You needed help loading up your gear? He was standing behind you pulling the straps over your shoulders. With a small smile and thank you, you slowly fell for him. That was almost a year ago now and everything was suddenly turning to shit.
At the start of the relationship and even a short few weeks ago things were great. Amazing. Exciting. Loving. Now, there was a constant revolving door of arguments.
You and Buck used to spend your days off at each other’s apartments, crafting new recipes or having movie marathons. Now, the only contact you had with him was at work. During calls you remained professional and when the shift ended you went your separate ways. The others could sense something was wrong and you both were reminded of the promise you made to Bobby when you disclosed the relationship: keep it professional and leave any drama at home.
The fights all started because Buck was becoming reckless again. Even after getting crushed by a truck and struck by lightening, he continued to act as if he was unstoppable. The call that did it was a tough one for everyone that left several people injured, luckily no one dead, and put a strain on your relationship.
A small bakery caught fire and even though Bobby instructed everyone to evacuate, Buck swore he saw movement in the building. That, mixed with a woman screaming “Shelby!” repeatedly, Buck ignored Bobby’s orders and your pleas to stay put. The glass of the windows had shattered and the flames got bigger but Buck exited the building coughing and covered in soot. In his arms was a small kitten, perfectly unharmed. As Buck smiled, handing the woman her fur baby, you hopped in the engine with a slam of the door. Eddie just gave Buck a look that said “you’re in for it tonight.” A heated argument ensued where you told Buck he was being reckless and disrespectful to not only Bobby but the team. Shortly after, you found yourself not being able to be paired with Buck and his antics during calls which Bobby accommodated.
Two days out from your one year anniversary, you decided to mend things and talk through your problems. You didn’t want to spend the celebration of your one year angry at each other and you certainly didn’t want to continue in a relationship where the love burned quick and bright and died just the same. You asked Buck to come in early to talk before your shift but before you could say anything, Buck had decided to end things.
You’re standing in the kitchen, hands braced against the counter. Your ears are ringing and your eyes are burning with unshed tears.
“You’re serious?” You whisper when he doesn’t elaborate on his previous two words. It’s over.
“I just don’t see how this is going to work when you can’t trust me. You can’t trust that I can do my job. You’re constantly breathing down my neck.” Buck uses his hand to express his frustrations.
“I care about you, Evan. I’m worried for you. You constantly throw yourself at the most dangerous situations without thinking.” You wrap your arms around yourself.
“That’s part of the job.” He argues.
“No it’s isn’t.” You shake your head. “Not when there’s others who can do it or when Bobby gives you orders and you deliberately disobey.”
“But no one can do it like I can.” He lays a hand on his chest.
“So this is a pride thing?” You angrily squint at him, tilting your head.
“You wouldn’t understand.”
“Why wouldn’t I understand? Help me understand.”
“You’ve never put yourself in a situation where you almost died. You work comfortably. You do what you’re asked and that’s it. You don’t go above and beyond.”
“Everyday we put our lives on the line. I may not run into fires or scale buildings but I do the same work as you. I choose to use my head and be safe and follow orders. So that makes me what? A bad firefighter?” You drop your hands by your sides, clenching your fists.
Buck runs a hand through his hair, “I just need my space. I need to be able to work without you hovering over my every move and doubting me.”
“I don’t doubt you Buck.” You cry. “You’re one of the best out there.”
“Lately, it hasn’t felt like you really believe that. You’re holding me back.” He leans against one of the high top tables.
“You know Buck, I was actually hoping to work things out but it seems like you’ve made up your mind. I thought your impulsive actions were just limited to the job but clearly it’s a trait you have with everything you do even relationships. Sometimes you’re so careless, I wish I cared less.”
“Well now you don’t have to worry about me and I don’t have to worry about you nagging.”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
You blink, watery tears streaming down your face. Buck gives you one last look before heading down to the lockers. As soon as he’s out of sight, his body racks with sobs as he leans against the lockers.
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I think I’m still just stuck on Oliver’s will they / won’t they wanting the audience to long for the relationship quote. As well as Tim quote about Buck figuring out who he is and who he wants. And Oliver’s quote about fighting to be together. I am still hopeful of the potential direction they can take this in. I do think this coming episode will be the make or break in a way. If we see villainizing Tommy (which I don’t think they will based on the way both Tim and Oliver sympathized his decision) then I think its over but if we see Chim and Maddie helping Buck to understand Tommy’s actions then I think there’s still a chance. Also to me having Chim and Maddie talk to him is very interesting. They were a couple that fought to be together, broke up and then found their way back to each other. Having them in the scenes with Buck post break up helps me to feel hopeful about the direction they’re going in tbh. I don’t think it will be resolved at all by the end of 8a. But I do think 08.08 may leave off with Buck deciding whether or not he wants to reach out.
Honestly, all the interviews are bullshit. That’s where I am now lol the actors never know wtf is going on. I think they’ve been told so many things and, like, 2 out of 20 have actually turned into something. There was a load of nothing with madney, henren, and mara. Tim had stated that Eddie would be a little left out while Buck and Tommy’s relationship grew and we got more scenes of Eddie with them than without. Buck struggled for like 10 seconds with whether or not he meant to hurt Gerrard, also nothing came from Gerrard taking him under his wing. The Ortiz storyline was meaningless, and Gerrard’s entire arc turned him into a joke. There was no “hurdle” in Buck and Tommy’s relationship, it was a fucking boulder that came through and splintered it into a million pieces.
Ryan even stated that Tim could change the script in an instant, so the actors have no idea what’s happening at any given time and neither does Tim apparently. I’m pretty sure he goes to ao3, randomly selects a fanfic with his eyes closed, then writes his scripts based off of said fic.
I know some people are being positive and saying Maddie and Chimney will help him see Tommy’s perspective, but I have absolutely no faith in the show or its writing whatsoever. I would not be surprised if we got a, “eh, Tommy’s always been distant. Always a runner and tough to crack. You dodged a bullet,” from Chimney. Not because I believe it’s actually something he’d say, but because the writing is so shit that they’d have him say it to further push Tommy out of the narrative. Then, idk, maybe Buck can go on his little fuck tour 🤷🏻♀️
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