#and has anyone actually seen the movie? do you know who directs it who wrote it?

[soldierandawar]

Breaking news! Actor does job.

[aangelinakii]

THEIR TASTE IN MOVIES.

characters written about in this piece : bruce wayne, dick grayson, jason todd, tim drake, damian wayne, barbara gordon, duke thomas, stephanie brown, cassandra cain

note : i lit thought of this last night and wrote it within 12 hours is this my comeback

BRUCE WAYNE

you guys are gonna hateee meee 💀💀💀💀 but i think bruce wayne is an avid documentary watcher. he likes living in real life, likes knowing everything he is experiencing is real. and he likes being in the know of the topics circulating the planet he's living on. he's not a reality tv person though (although he may have a super super guilty pleasure of love island uk that tim and barb found out and he literally threatened them to keep to themselves, but they use as blackmail anyway).

movies i think he would like :

fyre: the greatest party that never happened, 2019. directed by chris smith

how to catch a serial killer, 2018. directed by john holdsworth

athlete a, 2020. directed by bonni cohen & jon shenk

the hatchet wielding hitchhiker, 2023. directed by colette camden

DICK GRAYSON

the total opposite of bruce, i can see dick watching more idyllic things, and just feel good ! he might like a nice biopic, but is really picky (pun unintended) about them. he also enjoys musicals !! but musicals that focus on realism and story instead of theatricals, like i think he'd pass on moulin rouge, just because there's so much going on at one time. also likes media he consumed from when he was younger, he likes the fuzziness of nostalgia.

movies i think he would like :

the greatest showman, 2017. directed by michael gracey

a knight's tale, 2001. directed by brian helgeland

the truman show, 1998. directed by peter weir

bohemian rhapsody, 2018. directed by bryan singer

JASON TODD

jason loves an action movie. he so wouldn't tell anybody, but if he likes a move he's seen in a film, he'll try it on patrol, taking out one of penguin's henchmen, or even when just training in the bat cave. but he loves films where a lot's going on and the choreography is really impressive !! he really admires fight choreographers for being able to make them look realistic, and likes to laugh at the ones that are shite.

movies i think he would like :

bullet train, 2022. directed by david leitch

scarface, 1983. directed by brian de palma

kingsman: the secret service, 2014. directed by matthew vaughn

john wick, 2014. directed by chad stahelski (and all the sequels)

TIM DRAKE

this guy prefers to watch alone, meaning he can experience sadder watched exactly how they're meant to be watched; in tears. he probably struggles to be emotional, so also watching films like these is an outlet for him. i love how with all of these their films are like a guilty pleasure thing they wouldn't tell anyone. i think people's choice in film is very telling though, so...

la la land, 2016. directed by damien chazelle

manchester by the sea, 2016. directed by kenneth lonergan

aftersun, 2022. directed by charlotte wells

dead poets society, 1989. directed by peter weir

DAMIAN WAYNE

we all know damian wayne is an... interesting species. i feel like even though he knows it is an unlikely scenario, he has figures out everything he would do in a zombie apocalypse, but hasn't told anybody, and would actively make fun of someone who has done the same. like he knows what weapons he'd need, where he'd go, how he'd make an antidote. what i'm trying to say is he likes zombie movies, and horror movies. it feels like he's testing himself, on his ability to be scared or prepared in these or future scenarios. even tho he doesn't actually get that scared. also doesn't mind foreign films, he thinks they're better at telling a story.

movies i think he would like :

train to busan, 2016. directed by yeon sangho

split, 2016. directed by m night shyamalan

hereditary, 2018. directed by ari aster

long legs, 2024. directed by osgood perkins

BARBARA GORDON

i can see barbara enjoying older films, like she likes films that show what life used to be like, and why it may have been better then, and why it may be better now. she's a very philosophical person, always thinking about shit like that. might be a black and white fan, but i'm talking technicolour classics ! she likes a good romance as well, but not ones she cries too, ones that are more feel-good and make her crave the love from that movie.

movies i think she would like :

how to lose a guy in 10 days, 2003. directed by donald petrie

west side story, 1961. directed by jerome robbins & robert wise

funny face, 1957. directed by stanley donen

notting hill, 1999. directed by roger michell

STEPHANIE BROWN

this girl will watch ANYTHING like she has such a wide taste. i said that with her music taste too, like i think she could find a way to enjoy anything. she doesn't like film bro films too much, thinks they're poo and they stink and if you're a guy and you like them you stink too and "get no bitches", but obviously that's up to opinion. obviously. although she will watch anything, i think she has a preference for comedies, and that can come in any shape and form!

movies i think she would like :

scooby doo, 2002. directed by raja gosnell

scary movie, 2000. directed by keenan ivory wayans

white chicks, 2004. directed by keenan ivory wayans

mean girls, 2004. directed by mark waters

DUKE THOMAS

duke likes epic films, like if we ignore for a sec that we're in the dc universe, he would love the batman films, especially the nolan trilogy. but he also would actually be a huge marvel fan, i can totally see it. so he likes superhero films, and he's def a fan of comedy, so if it's mixed into one genre, that's a winner for him. he likes movie nights with the family, so sitting down and getting snacks. probably loves the cinema too, so goes to see the new releases every month. isn't too picky.

movies i think he would like :

deadpool & wolverine, 2024. directed by shawn levy

kick-ass, 2010. directed by matthew vaughn

the harder they fall, 2021. directed by jeymes samuel

top gun: maverick, 2022. directed by joseph kosinski

CASSANDRA CAIN

cassandra watches MASTERPIECES. she definitely has a letterboxd account and writes wayyy too much than she needs to about a film, no matter if she loved it, hated it, or was in the middle about it. she adores foreign films, and loves films with a message. she'll watch and enjoy a film with no plot, but can get tired of them. she likes a packed plot that keeps her focused.

mustang, 2015. directed by deniz gamze ergüven

oslo, august 31st, 2011. directed by joachim trier

eat drink man woman, 1994. directed by ang lee

devdas, 2002. directed by sanjay leela bhansali

[butter-egg-toast]

Secret admirer 💌

Anon question: how would the boys be as secret admisrs? Like them being romantic? Like a little lovely notes they leave everyday for you? Headcanons or scenarios plz 🙏

Just saw the second movie on YouTube I'm feeling motivated

Short n sweet 🍭

Sorry this took forever 😢

Hope you enjoy

✉Haru: He's definitely the best secret admirer out there. You'll never suspect him. He admitted that he has a crush on you but didn't know how to handle it. So he got some advice from friends.

"You got a letter? Who gave it to you? Do you think you'll respond back?"-Haru

✉Makoto: Is a literal nervous mess. He's nervous and shy. He askes you very specific suspicious and obvious questions regarding the letter. He is relieved you don't think the letter is weird

"So, y/n did you see anything strange today... or did you get anything??" -Makoto

Nagisa: Gets super very excited. Can't keep a secret worth nothing. Tells everyone what he's done.He giggling and asking if you seen something different today (pointing to the obvious)

"Rei chan, look what I wrote for y/n! She's never guess it me♡!!- Nagisa

Rei: He's shy but also is prideful how he woorded the letter. He tells Nagisa how you'll never suspect him. What makes its obvious its him he leaves clever well written riddles

"That is correct, it was I. Did you like what I wrote?"-Rei

Rin: He got the idea from gou and some movie. He thought it would been romantic. Got super embarrassed after realizing what he did. Tried to play it off like he didn't do it but he doesn't want anyone to take credit

"Damn...I didn't think through, um.. yeah it was me...do you like it? "-Rin

Sousuke: He's not the type to do it but somehow  he managed to keep a straight face. With his letters he leaves small pieces of your favorite candy tape to it (this gives it away that its him)

"Did I write that letter? How you figure that out?"-Sousuke

Kisumi: He tries his best not to make it obvious but he put SO much in his letters, like little doodles, hearts and sticker placed all over the letter.

"Wow someone must really like you y/n."-Kisumi

Asahi: He'll go straight forward with you but he'll do words of encouragement letters. When you even mention about the letter he looks like he's going to jump with joy.

"Really?! That letter made your day? Well there's more coming your way!!"-Asahi

Ikuya: Hes good at hiding it but he gave it away quickly after he mention a letter when you never told anyone. You actually caught him putting the letter in your bag. Poor guy got so embarrassed

"Uh...its..here, I have been writing these for you.

Hiyori: Another perfect secret admirer. He's a literal ninja. He's good a keeping his cool when mention. Seems like the type to place hidden letters for you to find all over the campus

"A note.. can I see... well looks like you have a little admirer... and the note is very beautifully written"-Hiyori

Natsuya: does a poor job hiding it. He's Direct with his feelings but he's also very playful with you. He wants you to fall for his words. He'll probably do like a little scavenger hunt of gifts he bought for you to find.

" oh yeah, I wrote that letter, except more to come! -Natsuya

Nao: secret secret admirer (at first). Then over time He wants you to know its him.  Even when you find out its him. He'll keep giving you the notes. He'll also quote bits words from his letters

"It seems someone has a admiration for you y/n i wonder who it is...-Nao

Kaede: His team mates(nagisa)convinced him this was a good idea. Somehow he wrote you letter telling you to meet him somewhere (restaurant). You meet him and he surprises you by ordering any food you want. He seems mean and tough but he's definitely have a loving side

" I shouldn't even listen to those bastards... what you want to eat?"- Kaede

[vohtaro]

to the anon who sent me an ask recommending i read the da vinci code: sorry tumblr ate your ask. i do hope you see this.

so here it is. my da vinci code book review.

well, that was... a book.

context: while i have seen the movie 'angels & demons' like seventeen billion times bc it was on tv all the time, i have only seen the da vinci code once, probably around when it came out. i feel it safe to say that i was fairly fresh on the material. i listened to it on audiobook over the course of 3 weeks bc that's what was available soonest from my library.

i can start by saying... i get why this book was popular. you have conspiracy, "the church is hiding a truth!" drama, little puzzles that chock themselves up far beyond their merit... selling the idea that every symbol, every story, is somehow this secret tapestry that all cultures across the world are metaphorically shaking hands on... yeah. it's the kind of book that someone reads and gets the chat about at dinner parties and end on, "well, you never know, it could be true!". the chapters are short, too, which is amazing given the amount of entirely unnecessary detail stuffed into them.

brown's writing style is at times deeply insufferable. most times it's mundane, but his descriptors are damn painful at times. the detail he provides are either entirely unnecessary and add nothing, or are so far beyond what anyone cares about. but i think the worst offense of his writing is the air of smugness that it carries. the obnoxious quips about hollywood, the students he was lecturing at whatever school, his general internal monologue; there were these little remarks that i could just feel that when dan brown wrote them, he paused from his typing to give himself a cheeky little pat on the back. "I showed them," he chortled to himself, wiggling in his chair. "gave them a good smarting, I did!". it feels like brown has a Big Thought about some utterly minuscule thing that absolutely does not matter, but if he doesn't say it, he'll fckin explode.

as someone who has no serious religious background/education, i found the entire "secret"... rather underwhelming. i struggle to imagine that the entire world would be torn asunder because jesus fucked that one time. and not to mention, the idea of a direct bloodline from jesus being so vital for ??? some reason that i don't even recall was explained, felt so... bizarre?? just entirely strange. like, i don't know why the existence of a direct descendant of jesus christ would be so fundamental in the destruction of a multi-thousand year long faith, but sure. pop off, dan brown. and no, i really don't want anyone to explain it to me.

robert as a character is very. idk. he's inoffensive, ig. his character suffers by being a product of brown's desire to mic drop once in a while. i'm sure robert said some dumb shit that i forgot about, but he's really just some guy talking out of his ass with a bit too much confidence. he's not intentionally rude or anything. it's hard to describe him bc he's just A Guy who knows shit about pictures. he's a picture guy. Professor Picture. idk if he's a professor.

sophie meanwhile is a character whose purpose is being by-association rather than being a person with her own agency. she is important because she knew jacques and solved his riddles and puzzles as a child; not because of her own professional merits. she solves like three things at the beginning, all of them being word puzzles and then the fibonacci sequence password at the bank. otherwise, she is someone who gets upset about her late grandfather for a plethora of different reasons. not unreasonable of her, given just how much she uncovers in the span of 36 hours, but that's really where her character ends. at times, she is forward, perhaps even brazen with her determination, which i did appreciate. at the start of the story, she's actually moving the plot along quite a bit: she gives robert the clue via the phone message; she breaks the window in the bathroom and throws the tracker too iirc; she's driving during the car chase, helping robert escape (in her hashtag not sponsored Smart Car). but after that..... it feels like she's just along for the ride. i feel like she could have been more instrumental as time went on.

and speaking of sophie.... i could entirely feel the way that stupid romantic subplot was being shoved in between robert and sophie because some editor demanded it. it was so fucking brutal. their little """moment""" outside the house before robert left for paris the next morning had my fingers leaving impressions in the steering wheel.

the worst puzzle had to be the isaac newton one bc as soon as newton was mentioned i was like "apple. it's apple." and it took an UNGODLY amount of pages for anyone to piece it together. literally how did it take THAT FUCKING LONG. i was yelling in my vehicle and incurring road rage over it. APPLE!!! JUST GUESS IT!!! IT'S NOT LIKE THE CRYPTEX WILL LOCK IF YOU GUESS TOO MANY TIMES!!!! COME AWNNNN!!!

so anyways, thanks for recommending it. it sure was a trip. though given that you suggested this on anon, perhaps i should say 'how could you' since you knew what this book could do to a man. /lh

if you have any specific questions for me about impressions or thoughts regarding something i did not mention, feel free to ask; it's very possible that i just forgot to mention it.

[asteracaea]

Hi! Do you hear the vibe of Dress in imgonnagetyouback or just me? Also the first 10 seconds sound similar to the first 10 of Cornelia Street, what does it mean!?

:)

oh, imgonnagetyouback, one of my most favorites! i'm wild for this song!

i just listened to the first 10 seconds of both back and back: and YES i totally hear what you mean! the "wub wub wub wub wub" of cornelia street kind of smoothed out and softened. i really wish i knew more about music and production to be able to talk about those aspects of her songs better! i'm sure there's a TON of things to analyze there that we don't often think about!

and yes i definitely get the dress vibes! they are both so sexy and sultry, a low slow burning electricity of attraction. ah! so hot lol

and as for what it all means? well, i'm sure you can guess what i would say it means 😉 that they could all be inspired the same muse. and now to a very important point about how i listen to taylor's songs:

>>> in that last sentence i deliberately wrote "inspired by the same muse" instead of "about the same person" because i believe there is a distinction. to me, the phrase "about the same person" implies that a song is telling a true story about an actual event that actually happened. i know taylor has built her entire brand on the narrative that her songs are taken straight from her diary entries, but i honestly don't believe that and i don't think it was ever true. sure maybe some are more direct than others but definitely not all. remember how she said she had never been in any relationship before like speak now? so all those songs about relationships from her first two albums and the unreleased catalogue are made up. which IS SOMETHING ALL WRITERS DO. there is some weird insistence today that all female songwriters are not imagining fictional scenarios and all their art is taken directly from their lived experiences, but that's never true. sure, they can be related to or inspired by or transformed from emotions they felt but they could also be about things they've observed in others or seen in movies etc etc etc. i'm going off on a tangent but i think this point is important.

so ok, the concept of a muse. a muse is someone who inspires art and creation. taylor could have a muse in her life who she imagines in different scenarios, imagines how she herself would feel in those scenarios, crafts stories with the muse as a main character. dreams about how other people respond to the muse. muses inspire the imagination. so taylor could be musing on her muse and come up with fictional stories. they don't all have to be about actual events taylor experienced with this person.

(disclaimer: i don't know her creative process. maybe i'm completely wrong about how she works. but it's possible, and i think it discredits her talents as an artist to claim that she can only ever write about things she herself has experienced. no one ever says that about novelists!!! and taylor herself explicitly said she did this with folklore, so i don't know why this is even a conversation, ya kno?)

so, in my mind, a song like the 1 or gold rush or imgonnagetyouback could be inspired by a certain person even if the two of them never experienced those things literally. in my prívate mind, i can enjoy picturing a certain person in these sad broken-up heartbreak longing songs, but not believe that's what actually happened between them in real life. taylor could be imagining how she (or a fictional narrator) would feel in a situation like that, if the muse were her lover and left her, or if they never became lovers at all, or if they broke up but she's not sure if she's gonna smash up this person's bike or pull them back into the closet... etc etc

so that's just how i do. it may not make sense, i may not be able to explain it well, but it makes me not worry or stress about this kind of stuff. we can't know the truth, so let's interpret the songs in the way that makes us enjoy them the most! and don't let anyone tell you you're wrong, because they don't know the truth either, and the truth honestly doesn't matter. as taylor says over and over, these songs are ours now.

[palukoo]

92 !

the bride wore red (1937), which i'll say isn't like crazy notable to me but that could have something to do with the fact that i watched uh 16 movies that week and 3 that day. that said, it was fun!

it was pretty standard 1930s joan crawford, in that it was like rags to riches social climbing partially via contrived romance. it's kind of funny though because this rich guy just like has a disagreement with a friend bc he's like class isn't actually like anything to do with virtue or value or whatever, a rich person and a poor person are the same except money. so to prove his point, without telling anyone else, he gives a broke bar singer a bunch of money and a week reservation at a fancy hotel. again that's not that weird it's like kind of pygmalion except for the part that he does literally nothing to help her, train her, etc, beyond the actual money and room. she gets some help learning like "class" from the hotel staff (so, i guess maybe pretty woman is a better comparison potentially, only in this she's actively lying to rich boy instead of like at his request), including a maid there who is an old friend of hers (who is the only one she tells about the whole thing). basically she just charms this rich group of people, especially a young rich guy who she decides she should marry except he's engaged. meanwhile she falls in love with (and is fallen in love with by) the humble town mailman (played by her at the time real life husband franchot tone. in a shocking turn of events he's not the rich asshole love interest of hers in this movie. bitches who have seen too many joan crawford movies know what i'm talking about). it's just classic should she be with the rich guy or the guy she loves, and also how long can she conceal that this is all a ruse? like overall it's fine they all find out she's lying and she ends up with the mailman

it is kind of interesting to see how the dynamic between her and the mailman and her and her maid friend change as she becomes more integrated with the high society people and also more anxious about losing it all, because she gets really snappy/bitchy to them but also can only actually feel comfortable around them. also like they do also call her on it in a way that they wouldn't with like actual upper class people. old movies are like. all about rich people lol and like kind of classist but they talk a lot more about class than modern movies which is interesting. there's like a thing where old movies will say something that reads as like a critique (like, for example, in paid 1930 they are very explicit about the fact that the legal system is biased and made to benefit the rich) but they don't actually critique it they're just like yeah this is a thing that is true (and always will be and always has been-- in other contexts it just is gender essentialism lol)

i have to shout it out though for being directed by dorothy arzner, and also for having a fun little mini monologue that i literally wrote down while watching it because i was like i just like this and it's so silver springs fleetwood mac. here let me find it. while she's trying to get rich boy but he's like i'm engaged, she says:

"But I want you to love me. I want you to marry her and I want my love to haunt you. To make you lie awake at night. To burn your heart. To make you sick with pain. I want you to think of me and ache for me. I want to never see you again."

[its-maemain]

Accidently got angsty my bad

Edit: I'm sorry I went in like four different directions when I wrote this, my deepest apologies

Okay showerthoughts (literally)

So Bowser is a turtle right? A firebreathing semidragon-like turtle but they're there. So I'm assuming if he’s like any turtle from the Earth’s animal kingdom then Koopas have a long life span when given the chance to.

So Master Ogwaying this shit, that man(turtle) lived to his 500s or something? So let's say Koopas have like “turtle years”/Koopa years, similar to dog years but different I guess, more like cat years if I'm being honest.

From birth to ruffily 4/5 years they're like considered babies kinda, even if they're started to learn to talk proper sentences, but like they can live a few hundred years.

Anyway, 5-12ish regular kid, 12-16 tweens, 16-22ish teens could be longer honestly, so 22-early 30s is a fresh adult they're the equivalent of early 20s. So on and so forth, yada yada. This thought process of mine is not perfect.

So I don't know how old Bowser is, but I assuming within Peaches age for actual year's, so some where from late Koopa teens to early adult, but he’s already an adult to a human.

By that logic(???) he is a teen or very young father, as compared to human age is a very reasonable age. I don't know when he has Bowser Junior or adopts the Koopalings. Point is he’s a young dad by Koopa standards.

So in his early kidnappings of Peach I would like to believe he was infatuated with her, thought he was in love much like the Mario Movie. It became more political over time, while Koopas can live a long time that does make the time passing any easier. So his people are suffering as the lands they live on aren't as plentiful as other lands, the Mushroom Kingdom has those healthy lands and such. He wants to succeed in being King so when (and if? I guess) his son becomes King he doesn't have to worry about fixes these problems all because he couldn't do it.

It becomes more about the future of his kingdom, his people, and most of all his family.

So to the whole point of my shower train of thought, imagine Bowigi with this concept!! Luigi is only a human much like Peach, so he won't live as long as Bowser, a hundred years at best.

It’s not really common knowledge that Koopas can live for far longer than most other creatures of other kingdoms. Usually, this is something only royals know about, as through diplomatic happenings and such. Peach knows about this, so it's one of the reasons she’s never truly been concerned about Bowser, as eventually he has to stop right? At some point, it will get weird as she grows old, as she won't live that long, and he will give up at some point of course. (sorry I keep side-tracking)

So as it’s not common knowledge to citizens, but imagine Luigi finding out about this, and reading books in the royal library or something. He’s always found how Bowser attractive admirable, and that he is much gentler than people give him credit for.

He’s seen him when no one is actually watching him, while he’s fuming that Mario won the race or got Peach back, if is son or one of the Kooplings are around he puts it aside to address them, checking them over, giving them love and attention. And at some point it may have softened a part of Luigi’s heart in a very specific way. The way he looks at his children with love and glares protectively at anyone who comes within five feet of them at events or races, the childish way he would glance away Kamek when he scolded him for injuring himself, or the way he seemed to watch over everything when in a room with a careful eye.

So to learn that in Koopa culture traditionally he is very young, while yes he young, he is young if you looked at Koopa aging like human aging. There is of course not a perfect system as it's more of a unspoken cultural thing, the ages I have said are more of a Toadstool royal of the past making effort to understand the Koopa traditions.

- so to learn that Bowser is relatively young, so the fact that Bowser is a young king at that, raising a big family, running kingdom. Luigi can't help but feel tingly about it.

Now to the pure Bowigi part my mind came up with because I don't want to make build up to it.

Luigi loves flowers, I don't know if it's cannon, I don't care, it's cannon to me, not even a head cannon. He loves them, I don't make the rules, he loves nature, him and Mario would garden with their mother as kids a lot. Luigi does it when they visit their parents, helping his mom with the plants, sometimes Mario jumps in to but not often.

So when Luigi off handy mentions he likes flowers and Bowser can't help but obsess over that for Luigi. So he tries giving him flowers and such, Luigi loves it, he prefers flowers growing and flourishing but he doesn't have the heart to tell him to stop.

Eventually Luigi or Mario say something along the lines of gardening is Luigi’s favorite thing ever. (imagine this is in like early Bowigi relationship) so he has a garden made for Luigi, and the thing is that's it's all flowers that can live for very long times, like that of roses.

So even when Luigi pastes awayed Bowser and his children visit the garden when they miss him. The older the flowers the more time that is spent with them.

One if reasons I have this cause well Bowser, Koopa, turtle like. Also I found out today that one of the oldest rose bushes is like over 1,000 years old apparently? Haven't fact checked it, but I will, but still I find it beautiful. A flower that us humans view as the embodiment of love, especially romantic, can live for so long if properly taken care of much like that of real love.

Love takes work, it's nurturing and needs it in turn, it takes a lot to survive. Same with plants, and for roses to live as long as that post says then it need attention and to be well cared for it is to last long.

so that is nestled in my heart. Take what you will, leave what you distaste, hope you enjoyed my thoughts from shower. (I'm not kidding)

[adamwatchesmovies]

Bird Box Barcelona (2023)

While I didn't enjoy this film, that doesn't mean you won't. No matter what I say, the people involved in this project did it: they actually made a movie. That's something to be applauded. With that established…

2018’s Bird Box was a surprise hit for Netflix and since the similar (but superior) A Quiet Place got turned into a franchise, it only makes sense for the other sensory-deprivation horror film to expand as well. Bird Box Barcelona gives its universe a welcome, fresh direction that easily sucks you in but unfortunately, its initial potential gets squandered.

Civilization has collapsed following the arrival of mysterious entities. Anyone who sees these creatures is compelled to commit suicide, forcing everyone left to walk around blindfolded while doing their best to ignore the entities’ attempts to manipulate them using the voices of people they hold dear. In Barcelona, Spain, Sebastián (Mario Casas) and his daughter Anna (Alejandra Howard) travel together, looking for other survivors. When they hear that Montjuïc Castle might be a safe refuge, they decide it’s their only hope.

There’s one other detail about the world that’s particularly important for this film. We saw it in Bird Box but it’s expanded greatly here. In some rare cases, people will go insane after seeing the entities instead of killing themselves. It’s like they become agents of the entities and go around, trying to find ways to get other survivors to look at the creatures so they can either commit suicide or become more “seers”.

It’s a minor spoiler but it’s impossible to talk about the movie without revealing that Sebastián is a seer. This person we meet and initially think is a good guy just trying to keep his daughter safe is actually moving from one group of survivors to another and tearing them apart from the inside, sabotaging their efforts so they can be “saved”. That’s something we haven’t seen before.

Our protagonist is the villain, which makes for a lot of tension. At first, you don't know he's been "infected" so you're worried like you are about everyone else. Then, you’re anxious the group he’s joined will all wind up dead because he’s leading them astray. Finally – and this comes in during different parts of the movie – you’re sort of concerned for everyone when the group encounters the typical seers, which aren’t content with “gently” leading people towards death; they’re actively attacking you. Sometimes you hate Sebastián. Sometimes you pity him (particularly in the flashback scenes that show how he and his daughter ended up where they are). Often, the deaths along the way are so sudden and the people who die are so eager to end themselves you’re just unsettled down to your bones.

The problem is that ultimately, Bird Box Barcelona can't maintain its fresh take on this “wolf in sheep’s clothing” story. By the time we get to the last third of the movie, you can feel Álex Pastor and David Pasto (who wrote and directed the film) trying to find a way to redeem Sebastián and make him heroic. This is despite him causing innocent people to die for over an hour and a half at this point.

Making this sequel spinoff even more generic and uninteresting is the amount we learn about the entities. As we explore all the ways you can “get around them”, they become less mysterious, less frightening. At first, there might have been a tiny part of you that wondered if maybe Sebastian and the seers were right. Maybe they are angels or some kind of celestial beings looking to free humanity or something. What happens is far too ghoulish for this to be part of any sort of divine plan, but maybe it's an agenda beyond our understanding, right? Once we get into scenes where the characters can keep their blindfolds off because the room they’re in is locked and there are no windows so they know they're safe and all that, the scares have become non-existent.

I’m not sure if the ending’s promise of even more to come will be welcomed by fans. Maybe for those that are morbidly curious. Then again, you are seeing this "for free". Though Bird Box Barcelona keeps your stomach in knots at first, your interest in it will almost certainly evaporate by the time it’s over. (July 23, 2023)

[supermarine-silvally]

Hello Bingo buddy! It is I @endless-oc-creations here to ask you five questions about your oc Iryna Oleksandrivna Kovalenko!

1.) What inspired you to make Iryna?

2.) What's Iryna's home life like?

3.) Who is Iryna's closest friend at U.A.?

4.) What's Iryna and Bakugou's relationship like when they finally get together?

5.) How does Iryna's quirk work?

Have a wonderful day!!

Aaaaaa omg these are such amazing questions!!! I'm always literally so excited to talk about my girl sdlskdjfsdf I've put the answers below the cut because they got long af

1) What inspired you to make Iryna?

I’d been making OCs for shows (especially anime) and movies I enjoy for years haha so of course when BNHA came out and I watched the first season, I knew I had to make an OC for it as well! I had come up with a character concept of a foreign student at U.A. who travelled to Japan to find her missing mother and even drew a design that is extremely similar to Iryna’s current one, but I didn’t do much with the character until the pandemic hit and I re-watched the show up to season 5. I really enjoyed it on the rewatch so I went back through my old art and found the character design I’d made back when the anime first came out and decided to breathe some new life into the character. I’d actually come up with her nickname, “Kova”, long before her given name, so I re-used that and started fleshing out her backstory.

As for why she’s Ukrainian? I really wanted to make an Eastern European OC and it gave me the opportunity to extrapolate on what hero societies might look like in the BNHA world outside Japan or America. I don’t remember why exactly I settled on Ukraine, though. (It was long before the Russian invasion I swear I didn’t intend it to line up with current events!)

The other challenge I had was trying to figure out exactly where she fit into the BNHA world. I knew I wanted her to be a U.A. hero student, but I didn’t want her to replace anyone in the canon Class 1-A or 1-B. Eventually, after some thought, I settled on her being a year younger than the protagonists and entering U.A. as part of the incoming Class 1-A. The mentorship program idea that drives the plot of my fic Ground Zero formed when I realized that her quirk had some similarities to Bakugou’s and then basically went “wouldn’t it be funny if they interacted cuz they’re both pretty stubborn and hotheaded too” and then I ended up really liking their dynamic. It 100% wasn’t planned as a ship initially, but ended up heading in that direction the more I wrote them.

2) What's Iryna's home life like?

She’s really, really close to her (remaining) family! Though she hasn’t seen her mother since she was eight, she has a really strong bond with her dad, Sasha, who has always been very supportive of her dreams. She’s EXTREMELY protective of her younger brother by six years, Mykyta, especially since he’s quirkless, and has played a huge part in helping raise him— she takes her job as Big Sister very, very seriously. She also lived with her grandmother, Stanislava, in the small town of Letychiv for a few years before moving to Japan to attend U.A., and is very close with her as well. They’re not a wealthy family, but they’re a very tight-knit bunch. Iryna would definitely say she has a happy home life, but she still really misses her mother, Reina, and wants to learn the truth behind her mysterious disappearance. It’s also worth noting here that she knows pretty much nothing about her Japanese side of the family since Reina never told her children anything about her life prior to moving to Ukraine.

3) Who is Iryna's closest friend at U.A.?

Since she’s a year younger than the canon main cast, the people she’s closest to are her own classmates— I actually have 19 other OCs that make up the rest of the new Class 1-A lol maybe one day I’ll get around to sharing more about them. Of the class, her closest friends are Iida Tenshi (Tenya’s cousin) and Monoma Nagito (Neito’s brother). Outside her class, she’s closest to Bakugou since he’s her mentor, and as such will sometimes hang around with the Bakusquad.

4) What's Iryna and Bakugou's relationship like when they finally get together?

finally being the key word here lmao I don’t see them officially dating in high school at all. They both would rather launch their careers and pursue their dreams first, and a proper relationship comes many years down the line when they’re both Pros.

People expect their relationship to be a lot more volatile, since they’re both very stubborn, tend to set high expectations for themselves, and have very fiery personalities, but it’s actually kinda… remarkably chill? A lot of it is a continuation of how they are as friends and comrades-in-arms, just knowing each other inside and out and almost always being on the same wavelength. Their non-verbal communication skills are ridiculously strong— to the point where Iryna can tell what kind of mood Katsuki is in just by the sound of his footsteps— and they just kinda know what the other needs and wants without either of them having to vocalize it. Even when they were just friends, he was way more lenient with her than he was with anyone else, letting her borrow his stuff, cooking for her, tutoring her (without yelling at her lol), tolerating her teasing, and just generally allowing her to be in his space. It did take her a while to wear down his defences and get to that point but now he’s totally wrapped around her little finger and there’s nothing either of them can do about it. His friends still tease him about it mercilessly.

As adults, they’ve both matured a lot and put a ton of effort into strengthening their relationship on and off the battlefield. They play-bicker with each other, but rarely seriously fight (the rare fights are usually of the “don’t be so damn reckless!!” variety). The one major thing that everyone notices when they do finally get together is how flirty they become with each other— not that they weren’t low-key constantly flirting in their own weird ways before, but now it’s INSUFFERABLE lol they’re always trying to show off for each other and making little competitive bets and using sparring as foreplay. Despite this, they prefer to keep their relationship as private from the media as they possibly can. Overall, they’re best friends and allies and lovers all wrapped up into one, and as Iryna herself notes, there’s no Molotova without Dynamight.

5) How does Iryna's quirk work?

Her quirk, Nuclear Fission, allows her to generate and release massive quantities of fission energy, akin to a nuclear reactor or an atomic bomb. She can detonate this energy into explosions, or can channel it (especially once her control has gotten a lot better) and use it as a power source. A byproduct of her quirk makes her completely immune to nuclear radiation, allowing her to handle nuclear materials that would normally be extremely deadly with her bare hands for as long as she wants without the risk of death. While it’s a very powerful and useful quirk, it’s also quite dangerous— overuse of her powers can potentially send her body into a nuclear meltdown state that will cause irreparable damage and in extreme circumstances, even lead to a horrible, excruciating death. Because of this, she has to work hard to learn how to control her quirk and keep herself stable. Ingesting Uranium-235 supplements can provide short, temporary boosts to her power, and using her quirk manifests physically as her skin lighting up with the blue glow of Cherenkov radiation. I should also note that her explosions don’t leave radioactive waste behind, as part of her quirk (the part that also allows for her radiation immunity) makes it so that the radioactivity she produces decays in seconds rather than hundreds of years. (If you want to read more about how exactly her quirk works, Chapter 15 of Ground Zero goes into further detail!)

tysm for the questions!!! I hope the answers made sense <3

[shokami]

wc ; 1k in total

featuring ; kuroo, kenma, akaashi, and bokuto

synopsis ; being in a poly relationship with four people was never an easy task, but things get worse when the squish of peace goes missing. poly! headcanons and drabble.

you started dating kuroo first, that’s how this all ended up happening.

next thing you knew, you ended up developing feelings for kenma, which you really thought was going to be an awkward conversation. turns out they were actually pretty ecstatic to be in a poly relationship with you.

as for how bokuto and akaashi ended up being a part of your relationship? well, you like to refer to that as a happy accident.

kuroo was very attached to a select few people, and it happened to be the four of you— so it was no surprise that you all hung out grouped together all of the time.

before you knew it, you were all basically acting like you were dating. akaashi would show up with lunch, or groceries, or with a moody bokuto at 2 A.M because ‘kuroo and kenma didn’t share you’.

you even got into the habit of showing up to every single one of MSBY’s games, and cheered him on from the front row.

it even got to the point where you were showing up at akaashi’s office to make sure he had lunch, or a late dinner.

don’t get it twisted though, you still paid special attention to kuroo and kenma too.

speaking of them, you indirectly hinted at the fact that you felt like you were all in a giant relationship together… to which kuroo awkwardly laughed and made a joke about it.

little did you know he had been thinking the same thing, and discussed it with kenma whether or not they should ask.

they never got the chance to because a few days later, bokuto and akaashi were leaving when akaashi kissed you, and kuroo accidentally dropped an ‘i love you’ to bokuto. this basically initiated the spider-man meme.

you had all gotten so comfortable being that close with one another, that things just formed on their own without anyone realizing at first.

that night led to a long conversation on whether or not the five of you could have a sensible relationship together.

spoiler warning: you did, and you guys were so disgustingly cute together.

it was a perfect balance. kuroo and bokuto were the loud duo, and you joked about how they gave the rest of you ‘scary dog privileges’.

then there was kenma and akaashi, who were the more silent and comforting, yet somehow still chaotic in their own ways—

you on the other hand, managed to be the mix that sat in the inbetween. your energy changed depending who you were around, and if it was all of them… it took your entire mental capacity to control them.

a lot of boundaries were in place, and everyone got days to be alone and take a break, and even days with specific partners for days out. it was the best way for no one to become overwhelmed, and it kept arguments and fights to a bare minimum.

your relationship is so healthy, and loving that it makes everyone else curious on how it works

you never have an answer, but it’s okay because not everyone needs to know

let it be known that in your house there is a singular reversible octopus squishy.

you and kenma are definitely the ones who use it the most, and bokuto is a close second.

akaashi used it once when he was tired and grumpy, and that gained him a lot of space from everyone and extra cuddles from you.

kuroo however, has never used it but he is in charge of keeping track of where it is and who has it. everyone calls him the mood watcher, he’s like your personal mood ring.

“TETSUROU,” you and bokuto ran into the living room out of breath, a look of terror on your faces. “Where is Mr. Octopus squishy?!”

Kuroo looked up from his spot on the couch, Akaashi sat beside him looking unbothered and focused as he wrote, “Yn, you don’t have it? I thought you were the last one with it.”

“YOU LOST MR. OCTOPUS?!” Bokuto whisper yelled, finally causing Akaashi to look up at the two of you.

“Kenma is setting up for a stream, and he is in a big bad mood— we need the octopus ASAP.” you calmly explained, pushing Bokuto in the opposite direction to look around the house.

The octopus squishy was seen as a sacred item in your house, and was always needed to express moods and the vibe of the room. You had vividly remembered giving it back to Kuroo last week, and you had no idea where he could’ve misplaced it. The damned octopus was vital for Kenma’s moods, and if you couldn’t find it… then you’d never know when the area was safe.

A bit dramatic, but it was a process that worked.

Both Kuroo and Akaashi began to look for the octopus with you two, and you knew everyone would get lectured for losing the squish of peace.

After about twenty minutes of looking, Kuroo found him tucked away in one of the many blankets around the house, “Okay, now who’s going to get it to him?”

You all fell silent, glancing at each other as the task presented itself. Kenma was the worst one out of everyone when it came to his bad moods, and none of you wanted to face his wrath.

“Kou I think you’re up—“

“HUH?? TETSUROU YOU LOST IT, YOU DO IT.”

“YEAH BUT YOU’RE FASTER, AREN’T YOU?”

Trying your best to refrain from laughing at the two arguing, you knew Bokuto would be the one to do it simply for the ego boost. “Okay take Mr. Octopus, you got this babe!”

Standing outside of Kenma’s streaming room, Bokuto took several deep breaths and prepared himself to run in and right back out.

“Speed. Speed. I am speed.”

You started giggling behind Kuroo, while he hyped himself up. Akaashi looked as if he was losing the remainder of his brain cells, listening to Bokuto recite quotes from the movie, Cars.

“Ok, Lightning Mcqueen…”

© All rights reserved by SHOKAMI. Do not modify, repost on any platforms, plagiarize, or claim as your own.

[qqueenofhades]

Hi. I’m curious. What did you mean by “women who read fiction might get Bad Ideas!!!” has just reached its latest and stupidest form via tumblr purity culture.? I haven’t seen any of this but I’m new to tumblr.

Oh man. You really want to get me into trouble on, like, my first day back, don’t you?

Pretty much all of this has been explained elsewhere by people much smarter than me, so this isn’t necessarily going to say anything new, but I’ll do my best to synthesize and summarize it. As ever, it comes with the caveat that it is my personal interpretation, and is not intended as the be-all, end-all. You’ll definitely run across it if you spend any time on Tumblr (or social media in general, including Twitter, and any other fandom-related spaces). This will get long.

In short: in the nineteenth century, when Gothic/romantic literature became popular and women were increasingly able to read these kinds of novels for fun, there was an attendant moral panic over whether they, with their weak female brains, would be able to distinguish fiction from reality, and that they might start making immoral or inappropriate choices in their real life as a result. Obviously, there was a huge sexist and misogynistic component to this, and it would be nice to write it off entirely as just hysterical Victorian pearl-clutching, but that feeds into the “lol people in the past were all much stupider than we are today” kind of historical fallacy that I often and vigorously shut down. (Honestly, I’m not sure how anyone can ever write the “omg medieval people believed such weird things about medicine!” nonsense again after what we’ve gone through with COVID, but that is a whole other rant.) The thinking ran that women shouldn’t read novels for fear of corrupting their impressionable brains, or if they had to read novels at all, they should only be the Right Ones: i.e., those that came with a side of heavy-handed and explicit moralizing so that they wouldn’t be tempted to transgress. Of course, books trying to hammer their readers over the head with their Moral Point aren’t often much fun to read, and that’s not the point of fiction anyway. Or at least, it shouldn’t be.

Fast-forward to today, and the entire generation of young, otherwise well-meaning people who have come to believe that being a moral person involves only consuming the “right” kind of fictional content, and being outrageously mean to strangers on the internet who do not agree with that choice. There are a lot of factors contributing to this. First, the advent of social media and being subject to the judgment of people across the world at all times has made it imperative that you demonstrate the “right” opinions to fit in with your peer-group, and on fandom websites, that often falls into a twisted, hyper-critical, so-called “progressivism” that diligently knows all the social justice buzzwords, but has trouble applying them in nuance, context, and complicated real life. To some extent, this obviously is not a bad thing. People need to be critical of the media they engage with, to know what narratives the creator(s) are promoting, the tropes they are using, the conclusions that they are supporting, and to be able to recognize and push back against genuinely harmful content when it is produced – and this distinction is critical – by professional mainstream creators. Amateur, individual fan content is another kettle of fish. There is a difference between critiquing a professional creator (though social media has also made it incredibly easy to atrociously abuse them) and attacking your fellow fan and peer, who is on the exact same footing as you as a consumer of that content.

Obviously, again, this doesn’t mean that you can’t call out people who are engaging in actually toxic or abusive behavior, fans or otherwise. But certain segments of Tumblr culture have drained both those words (along with “gaslighting”) of almost all critical meaning, until they’re applied indiscriminately to “any fictional content that I don’t like, don’t agree with, or which doesn’t seem to model healthy behavior in real life” and “anyone who likes or engages with this content.” Somewhere along the line, a reactionary mindset has been formed in which the only fictional narratives or relationships are those which would be “acceptable” in real life, to which I say…. what? If I only wanted real life, I would watch the news and only read non-fiction. Once again, the underlying fear, even if it’s framed in different terms, is that the people (often women) enjoying this content can’t be trusted to tell the difference between fiction and reality, and if they like “problematic” fictional content, they will proceed to seek it out in their real life and personal relationships. And this is just… not true.

As I said above, critical media studies and thoughtful consumption of entertainment are both great things! There have been some great metas written on, say, the Marvel Cinematic Universe and how it is increasingly relying on villains who have outwardly admirable motives (see: the Flag Smashers in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier) who are then stigmatized by their anti-social, violent behavior and attacks on innocent people, which is bad even as the heroes also rely on violence to achieve their ends. This is a clever way to acknowledge social anxieties – to say that people who identify with the Flag Smashers are right, to an extent, but then the instant they cross the line into violence, they’re upsetting the status quo and need to be put down by the heroes. I watched TFATWS and obviously enjoyed it. I have gone on a Marvel re-watching binge recently as well. I like the MCU! I like the characters and the madcap sci-fi adventures! But I can also recognize it as a flawed piece of media that I don’t have to accept whole-cloth, and to be able to criticize some of the ancillary messages that come with it. It doesn’t have to be black and white.

When it comes to shipping, moreover, the toxic culture of “my ship is better than your ship because it’s Better in Real Life” ™ is both well-known and in my opinion, exhausting and pointless. As also noted, the whole point of fiction is that it allows us to create and experience realities that we don’t always want in real life. I certainly enjoy plenty of things in fiction that I would definitely not want in reality: apocalyptic space operas, violent adventures, and yes, garbage men. A large number of my ships over the years have been labeled “unhealthy” for one reason or another, presumably because they don’t adhere to the stereotype of the coffee-shop AU where there’s no tension and nobody ever makes mistakes or is allowed to have serious flaws. And I’m not even bagging on coffee-shop AUs! Some people want to remove characters from a violent situation and give them that fluff and release from the nonstop trauma that TV writers merrily inflict on them without ever thinking about the consequences. Fanfiction often focuses on the psychology and healing of characters who have been through too much, and since that’s something we can all relate to right now, it’s a very powerful exercise. As a transformative and interpretive tool, fanfic is pretty awesome.

The problem, again, comes when people think that fic/fandom can only be used in this way, and that going the other direction, and exploring darker or complicated or messy dynamics and relationships, is morally bad. As has been said before: shipping is not activism. You don’t get brownie points for only having “healthy” ships (and just my personal opinion as a queer person, these often tend to be heterosexual white ships engaging in notably heteronormative behavior) and only supporting behavior in fiction that you think is acceptable in real life. As we’ve said, there is a systematic problem in identifying what that is. Ironically, for people worried about Women Getting Ideas by confusing fiction and reality, they’re doing the same thing, and treating fiction like reality. Fiction is fiction. Nobody actually dies. Nobody actually gets hurt. These people are not real. We need to normalize the idea of characters as figments of a creator’s imagination, not actual people with their own agency. They exist as they are written, and by the choice of people whose motives can be scrutinized and questioned, but they themselves are not real. Nor do characters reflect the author’s personal views. Period.

This feeds into the fact that the internet, and fandom culture, is not intended as a “safe space” in the sense that no questionable or triggering content can ever be posted. Archive of Our Own, with its reams of scrupulous tagging and requests for you to explicitly click and confirm that you are of age to see M or E-rated content, is a constant target of the purity cultists for hosting fictional material that they see as “immoral.” But it repeatedly, unmistakably, directly asks you for your consent to see this material, and if you then act unfairly victimized, well… that’s on you. You agreed to look at this, and there are very few cases where you didn’t know what it entailed. Fandom involves adults creating contents for adults, and while teenagers and younger people can and do participate, they need to understand this fact, rather than expecting everything to be a PG Disney movie.

When I do write my “dark” ships with garbage men, moreover, they always involve a lot of the man being an idiot, being bluntly called out for an idiot, and learning healthier patterns of behavior, which is one of the fundamental patterns of romance novels. But they also involve an element of the woman realizing that societal standards are, in fact, bullshit, and she can go feral every so often, as a treat. But even if I wrote them another way, that would still be okay! There are plenty of ships and dynamics that I don’t care for and don’t express in my fic and fandom writing, but that doesn’t mean I seek out the people who do like them and reprimand them for it. I know plenty of people who use fiction, including dark fiction, in a cathartic way to process real-life trauma, and that’s exactly the role – one of them, at least – that fiction needs to be able to fulfill. It would be terribly boring and limited if we were only ever allowed to write about Real Life and nothing else. It needs to be complicated, dark, escapist, unreal, twisted, and whatever else. This means absolutely zilch about what the consumers of this fiction believe, act, or do in their real lives.

Once more, I do note the misogyny underlying this. Nobody, after all, seems to care what kind of books or fictional narratives men read, and there’s no reflection on whether this is teaching them unhealthy patterns of behavior, or whether it predicts how they’ll act in real life. (There was some of that with the “do video games cause mass shootings?”, but it was a straw man to distract from the actual issues of toxic masculinity and gun culture.) Certain kinds of fiction, especially historical fiction, romance novels, and fanfic, are intensely gendered and viewed as being “women’s fiction” and therefore hyper-criticized, while nobody’s asking if all the macho-man potboiler military-intrigue tough-guy stereotypical “men’s fiction” is teaching them bad things. So the panic about whether your average woman on the internet is reading dark fanfic with an Unhealthy Ship (zomgz) is, in my opinion, misguided at best, and actively destructive at worst.

[argylesweedstash]

did you just call me baby

(ao3 link)

The first time it happens, it’s an accident. At least, Dean’s banking on Castiel thinking it’s an accident. And it is, really. Dean fell onto the war room floor covered in black goo with his arms around Cas. Sam and Jack leapt up from the table, moving away from the intricate spellwork that no longer needed their attention.

Cas stirred a little. He’d been out of it when Dean had found him - half-lucid and mostly disbelieving. He’d let Dean pull him up and sling his arm around his shoulders, but hadn’t said much. Only mumbled apologies and words that sounded a lot like, “I hope this is real.”

Jack was first on the floor next to them. “Cas?” he asked, a tentative smile playing on his lips. Cas nodded and within seconds, his arms were full of his son.

Dean watched them, a smile playing on his lips. When they broke apart, Sam offered Castiel his arm. Cas had looked at it before taking it and being pulled into a hug by the taller man.

Dean removed himself from the floor and helped Jack up. When Sam released Cas, Dean stepped in front of him.

“It’s real,” Dean said, looking into Cas’s eyes.

Cas nodded. “Thank you for saving me, Dean.”

Dean finally closed the distance between them and pulled Cas into a bone crushing hug.

“I missed you, baby,” Dean muttered against Cas. When he realized that he’d said baby instead of buddy, he could feel heat rising to his cheeks. He removed himself from Cas and grinned sheepishly at the floor. There was a weird fluttering feeling in his chest. He wrote it off as the adrenaline that was still pumping through his veins.

Cas, for what it was worth, didn’t seem to notice the word. “I missed you, too, Dean.”

-

That was two weeks ago. Since then, Dean has been avoiding talking about it. Not just his slip, though, the things Cas had said to him before The Empty came and took him. It wasn’t that Dean didn’t feel the same way - he just didn’t know if he did or not. He likes Cas and he’s his best friend. He knows he likes spending time with him. Sometimes he’s overwhelmed by how fond of his friend he is, but he doesn’t read too far into that.

Plus, things hadn’t changed between them. They still watched movies together in the Dean Cave a couple nights a week. Castiel would always come and join Dean in the garage when he was working on any of the cars they kept. Dean would greet him with a, “Good morning, Sunshine,” every morning from his place at the table. The only thing that had changed was that they didn’t have the end of the world looming over their heads. Honestly, this is the happiest he’s been in a long time. Getting Cas back meant that they’d tied up their loose ends and now they could relax. Of course Dean had never felt this happy, they’d never so resolutely saved the world like they did this time around.

Dean is sitting at the table, now, staring at the laptop screen in front of him. There were still monsters, there might still be a case somewhere. In the back of his head Dean knows he doesn’t really want to find a case. He’s been enjoying his time with Cas and Sam. He likes that the most pressing thing he has to worry about is whether or not the fridge is stocked. He knows Sam has been getting stir crazy, though. Maybe he’ll find a case and send Sam off, encourage him to get Eileen in on it.

The sound of footsteps draws Dean’s attention away from the laptop. Castiel pads into the room. He’s wearing one of Dean’s hand-me-down shirts, even though he hasvclothing of his own. Part of pulling Cas out of The Empty meant leaving his grace behind. Jack had been pretty clear - Cas’s grace was the reason Jack was unable to just pull him out. So, here Cas is, as human as Dean, wearing Dean’s shirt. A smile threatens to break on Dean’s face.

“What’re you up to?” Dean asks.

Cas turns to face him. Dean notices toothpaste stuck to the corner of Cas’s mouth, he must have just finished brushing his teeth.

“It’s almost lunch time,” Cas says. “I was going to make myself something. Are you hungry? I can make enough for two.”

Dean shakes his head. “Just ate,” he says. “You, uh -” He gestures vaguely at Cas’s mouth.

“I what?” Cas asks, tilting his head a little.

“Baby,” Dean starts as he gets up from his chair to walk over to Castiel. “You have some toothpaste. Right there.”

Cas stares at Dean, wide eyed. Dean resists the urge to roll his eyes and grabs a napkin from the table. He wipes at Castiel’s mouth before he crumples the napkin and walks it over to the trash. Cas watches his movements.

“What?” Dean asks when he notices Cas staring at him. It’s not that he minds, Cas just looks a little lost.

Cas just shakes his head and puts a smile on his face. “Nothing. Thank you, Dean. I didn’t realize.”

“It’s part of being human, man. No worries,” Dean says, depositing himself back in his chair. “You gonna eat in here?”

“Yes, of course,” Cas says, finally moving from where he was stopped.

Dean nods in his direction before he pats the chair next to him, smiling up at his friend. He returns to his research as Cas busies himself in the kitchen.

-

Two days later, Sam is gone to go after a nest of vamps and Eileen’s place just happens to be on the way there. Dean isn’t quite sure why Sam hasn’t just asked her to move in. He’s pretty sure Sam had refrained before because Dean had been a wreck with Cas gone. It was probably better for Dean and Eileen’s relationship that she hadn’t seen him like that. But now, there was no reason for her not to be here. She was family, after all.

Dean knocks on Cas’s door, ending his stream of thoughts. Dean was kind of bored and he hadn’t taken Cas anywhere but the supermarket since they’d brought him back. And, come to think of it, Dean couldn’t remember the last time just he and Cas had gone out for drinks.

Cas answers the door already dressed. “Dean. I was actually coming to look for you.”

“Well, I found ya first,” Dean says, putting an easy smile on his face. “Was gonna see if you wanted to come grab a drink with me. Looks like you’re going somewhere, though.” He didn’t want to press, but where on earth could Cas be going? It wasn’t like he really knew anyone around here outside of Sam and Dean. And if someone they knew was in town, why hadn’t Dean heard of it?

The ends of Cas’s lips turn up slightly. “I was going to ask you the same thing.”

Dean lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding and beams at Castiel. “It’s a date, then. Give me five minutes and I’ll meet you at Baby.”

Cas nods at Dean’s retreating figure and mumbles, “It’s a date,” before shutting his door to walk to the car.

Dean meets him there a few minutes later. “Had to grab my keys,” he says, holding them up for Cas to see.

The drive to the bar passes in comfortable silence, Cas staring out the window at the passing buildings. Dean drums his fingers on his steering wheel. He glances to Cas a few times; he almost can’t believe Cas is really back. He’d been gone for two months. Dean had spent most of that time frantically reading through every lore book and the rest drinking until he couldn’t remember the pain. It had been Jack that finally suggested opening the rift and leaving Cas’s grace behind. Dean had been ready to go almost immediately.

Now that Castiel was back, Dean felt better than he had in years. A warm feeling had settled over him after they fell through the rift and it stayed around. Whenever he was with Cas he could only describe the we he felt as “content.” Like now, for example, he could drive all night like this and be pleased with the way he spent his evening.

They pull in and Dean holds the door to the bar open so Cas can walk through. “Grab us a table and I’ll get drinks,” he says, clapping his hand over his shoulder and walking past him to the bar.

He gets the bartender’s attention pretty quickly. “Hey, Lynn. Slow night?” he asks.

She rolls her eyes at him and pushes a stray strand of blonde hair out of her face. “It’s a Wednesday, what do you expect?” She gives a little chuckle and leans against the bar. “Where’s your brother?”

“Sammy’s with his girlfriend. Won’t be back for a few days,” Dean says easily. “Left me alone with Cas over there.”

Lynn looks past him at Castiel, who is seated at a booth in the corner. He’s looking around the mostly empty bar, seemingly taking in the neon signs advertising different kinds of alcohol. He’s wearing one of Dean’s flannels, Dean realizes belatedly.

“He’s cute,” Lynn says. She turns her attention back to the man in front of her. “What can I get for you two?”

“Two beers,” he says. And then, as an afterthought, “And two shots of your top shelf whiskey.”

She grins. “Celebrating something?”

“Come to think of it, yeah,” Dean says. “He, uh.” He looks for the words. “Just got back from a work trip. Gone for a couple of months.” That sounds like a good cover.

“I bet he’s happy to be home,” Lynn says, setting the beers in front of Dean before turning to grab a bottle from the shelf behind her. “You seem happy that he’s back.”

It’s Dean’s turn to grin. “I’m freaking thrilled. Dude’s my best friend.”

Lynn slides the now filled shot glasses toward Dean. “Want a tray to carry all that?”

Dean doesn’t get to answer before she’s sliding a tray toward him. “You need a tray,” she says, putting the drinks onto it. “I know you were going to try to carry all this over there without one.”

Dean thanks her and slides the tray onto his left arm, steadying it with his right hand. He turns toward the booth Cas is in and flashes him a smile while he lifts the tray slightly, indicating the beverages.

“That my shirt?” he says when he gets to the table. He sets a beer and a shot down in front of Cas.

Cas looks down at the flannel and then back at Dean in a way Dean can only describe as bashful. “Yes. It must have gotten mixed in with my laundry. I can return it, if you want.”

“Keep it. Looks better on you anyway.” Dean picks his shot up and motions for Cas to do the same. “We’re celebrating, Cas.”

Cas picks up his shot and looks at Dean curiously. “What are we celebrating?”

“You’re back!”

Cas smiles warmly. “I am,” he nods. “Thanks to you.”

“Well, Sam and Jack helped,” Dean says, grinning.

“To humanity,” Cas says, raising the shot.

“To humanity,” Dean echos before taking the shot.

Cas makes a face after he downs his and raises his beer to his lips to chase the taste away.

“You’ve not had a drink since you got back,” Dean remarks, watching Cas take a few long drinks from the bottle.

“You haven’t either,” he replies.

Dean contemplates the statement. “Really?” He takes a sip of his beer. “I guess I’ve just been busy.”

They both know that isn’t really true. Dean’s only been engaging in leisurely activities, he’s just not been drinking during them. He wonders for a moment why that might be. It’s probably because he doesn’t have any pain he needs to ignore, he thinks.

“Your tolerance is going to be shit.”

Cas shrugs. “I’m a cheap date.”

Dean looks at him for a moment before laughing. Cas gives him a genuine smile before returning to his beer.

Several beers later, Dean cuts himself off. Someone has to drive home and Cas is more than a little giggly on the bench across from him. He takes a sip of his third beer and gives Dean a measured look.

“What?” Dean asks, putting a soft smile on his face. “See something you like?”

“Yes,” Cas says.

Dean grins back at him. There’s a tug somewhere in his chest, but he ignores it. “Anything on your mind?”

Cas just looks at Dean, clearly deep in thought. “Not really, no.”

Dean laughs and shakes his head. “Want another?”

Cas’s beer is still half full. “Another what?”

“Another drink. Or another shot.”

“Another shot might be nice, actually.”

Dean smiles at him. “That’s my boy. I’ll be right back.”

He returns to the bar and waits for Lynn to walk over to him.

“Two more?” she asks.

“Just another shot,” Dean says. “I’m driving but huggy bear over there can have whatever he wants.”

Lynn shakes her head and pours another. “You two been together long? I haven’t seen him in here.”

Dean blinks back at her and then looks down at the shot. “Actually we, uh, we haven’t talked about… that. Being together.”

She frowns at Dean and he takes a breath. He hadn’t been avoiding it, really. He and Cas had just fallen back into their comfortable rhythm.

“He doesn’t know how you feel, does he?” Lynn asks. She looks a little sad now.

“I guess he doesn’t,” Dean says thoughtfully.

“You should tell him.”

Dean looks up at her.

“Not tonight, though. He should probably be sober.”

Dean nods and grabs the shot. “Thanks, Lynn.”

He sets the shot down across from Cas when he gets back to the table. “For you.”

Cas downs the shot as Dean settles back down across from him. “What were you two talking about?”

Dean stares at Cas. He knows he shouldn’t lie but if he says anything Cas may actually want to talk about his feelings and Dean isn’t ready for that. He doesn’t really have words and he’s not even sure he’s fully processed Cas’s confession yet. And, Lynn was probably right. Cas should be sober for that particular conversation.

“Sam,” Dean lies easily. “This is where we come for drinks. Neither of us have been by in a while.”

Cas accepts the lie and sips from his beer before starting a conversation about Jack and the prospect of weekly family dinners.

By the time Cas had finished his beer the shot he’d taken seems to hit him. “Dean.”

“Cas.”

“I’d like another shot.”

Dean raises his eyebrows. “You can get it.”

Cas frowns at Dean before swinging his legs to the end of the booth to pull himself out. He pushes himself up on the table and wobbles a little before Dean is up and at his side, steadying him.

“When you don’t stand it hits you all at once,” Dean explains. He’s gripping Cas’s bicep and shoulder.

“I know how drinking works, Dean. I spend all my time with you.”

Dean chuckled low in his throat. “How about we get you home?”

“Can I drink there?”

Dean turns Cas to face him fully. “Hell yeah, you can.”

“You’ll be drinking, too?”

“Well, yeah. I won’t have to drive us anywhere. Can’t let you have all the fun.”

Dean walks Cas to the Impala and deposits him in the passenger’s seat. “I’ll be right back, baby. I have to pay the tab.”

Cas stares at Dean for a moment before opening and promptly closing his mouth.

“I’ll leave the door open in case you hurl. And I’ll get a bag from Lynn.”

Dean returns to see Cas has closed the door and is currently slumped against it, sleeping. He rolls his eyes and drives him home, careful to avoid the bumps on the road. When they get home, he shakes Cas awake.

“‘Morning, Sunshine.”

“It’s not morning, Dean,” Cas replies groggily.

“Nope,” Dean says, leaning over to pull Cas out of the car. “Let’s get you to your room.”

They make their way through the bunker slowly. Dean sits Cas down and gets him out of his shoes and, after a brief moment of hesitation, his jeans. Once he’s gotten Cas under the blankets, he gets a glass of water from the kitchen and a few tylenol from the bottle he has stashed in his room.

“Alright,” he says, setting everything down on Cas’s night stand. “Take the tylenol when you wake up. You’re probably going to be hungover. And drink some water, okay?”

“Yes, Dean,” says the Cas sized lump under the covers.

“Let me know if you need anything else, okay? I’m right down the hall.”

Dean turns to leave but Cas makes a noise. Dean turns back around.

“Thank you for taking me out tonight, Dean. I had fun.”

Dean smiles. “I had fun, too. Get some sleep, baby.”

He flicks out Cas’s lights and reminds himself to stop calling Cas buddy. The dude loves him and Dean’s probably making it hurt or something. Plus, he’d accidentally called him baby when he’d first gotten back from The Empty. Dean’s probably sending him mixed signals. He shuts the door behind him and walks to his room; he knows he should probably figure out what to say to Cas. Unfortunately, he was pretty sure that meant poking at that warm, fluttery feeling that seemed to be permanently in his chest.

-

Sam returns from the hunt a week later. He assures Dean it was an easy hunt and that he and Eileen hadn’t needed any help. He also admits to spending a few days with Eileen after they’d taken out the nest.

“How is she, anyway?” Dean asks, handing a beer to Sam and setting one on the end table next to Cas. They’d been watching old western’s in the Dean Cave when Sam got home. Cas had wanted to spend the day watching movies and Dean had agreed on the condition that he got to pick the movie.

“She’s good. She misses you two,” Sam answers.

“Tell her to get her ass out here,” Dean says. “She’s family at this point, man. She should be here, anyway. It would make hunts easier.”

Sam shook his head, smiling. “That’s the first hunt I’ve been on since we beat Chuck. You still haven’t been out.”

“Hey, I’m keeping Cas company. He’s still newly human,” Dean argues.

“You could go hunt if you want, Dean. I’m capable of taking care of myself. I don’t mind,” Cas says from the couch. Dean looks over at him and shakes his head.

“Nah, you’ve been back less than a month. We gotta make sure you have your sea legs before I go anywhere, baby.”

The words left his mouth effortlessly. Sam and Cas just stared at him for a second before Sam coughed.

“It’s great seeing you guys but I’m going to go shower and pass out for a few hours,” he says before making a quick exit toward his room.

“Fine, Sammy. We didn’t want to hang out with you, anyway,” Dean shoots back before collapsing onto his side of the couch.

He hits play on the movie and settles in. He has his own bottle of beer pressed to his lips when Cas speaks.

“Dean?”

“Yeah, Cas?” he replies, lowering the bottle from his lips.

Cas is quiet for a moment. “Why do you keep calling me ‘baby’?” he asks carefully.

Dean stares back at him. “I only called you that once,” he says, on guard now. Had it slipped out again? He didn’t think it had but now he’s not so confident. He sets his beer bottle down.

“No, you’ve done it five times.” So, it had slipped out again. More than once. “You did just now before Sam left.”

Dean is silent, unsure of what to say. He hadn’t even realized it had come out. “I’m sorry,” he finally decides, lowering his gaze from Cas’s stare for a brief moment.

“I don’t mind it,” Cas says quietly. He’s looking somewhere to the left of Dean, his eyes occasionally flickering to Dean’s face. “I thought you were doing it on purpose, is all.”

Dean can’t seem to form a fully coherent thought. He knows he needs to say something - mention Cas’s confession, maybe. But he doesn’t have the words for that yet. Instead he says, “Do you want me to stop?”

“I want you to do it on purpose,” Cas says, looking down. Dean can see the beginnings of pink on the top of his ears. He’s overwhelmed with an ache somewhere in his chest.

Dean doesn’t know why, but he slides in close to Cas. He reaches his hand out and lifts his chin so their eyes meet. “Anything you want, baby,” he says, softly. The fluttering in his chest is more insistent now.

He hears Cas’s breath hitch. Cas closes and opens his eyes before saying. “Can I ask something?”

“Of course,” Dean says, his hand still resting on Cas’s chin.

“Will you kiss me?”

Before Dean registers what he’s doing, he nods and ducks his head in. The kiss is chaste and quick but Cas leans in and responds gently. When they break, there’s a soft smile on Cas’s face.

“Cas,” Dean says, moving his hand to Cas’s cheek. “I, uh. I need to talk to you about. About what you said. Before you… Ya know.”

“When I told you I loved you?” Cas supplies, his eyes half-lidded.

“Yeah,” Dean says, chuckling lightly. “I. I think I do, too. I just haven’t -”

“You don’t have to say anything, Dean. You know that.”

Dean brings his mouth gently back to Cas’s and kisses him again. This time just a little longer, his other hand finding Cas’s waist.

“It was just so easy when you got back,” Dean says when he pulls away. He tries to find any string of words that expresses how he feels. “I didn’t think I needed to say anything but…”

Cas stares at Dean, encouraging him to keep going. Dean can feel his face heating up.

“Lynn asked how long we’d been together,” he says, lamely. “The bartender,” he adds.

“I didn’t get to meet her but I remember her name.”

Dean smiles at him and takes a breath before speaking. “And I told her we hadn’t talked about it. And she looked really sad. I realized I do need to say something.”

They’re silent for a moment and then Dean says. “Holy shit. That was a date.”

Cas looks confused. “You told me it was a date.”

“I did?”

“Yes. When I said yes to going with you, you said ‘it’s a date.’” Cas says.

Dean shakes his head. “It’s… It’s an expression, Cas,” he says. Then, “But, uh, that was a date. I think.”

“Dean. Did you want it to be a date?” Cas asks. His voice is lined with both patience and amusement.

Dean pauses for a minute before saying, “Yeah. That was our first date.” He leans in and presses another kiss to Cas’s mouth.

Cas kisses back and then pulls away a little. “Would you like to go on a second date?”

Dean makes a show of thinking. He hums lightly.

“Dean.”

“Yeah, Cas. I do,” he places a kiss on the side of Cas’s mouth before he drops his hand. “I, uh, I don’t really know what to say but… You can have me, if you want. You’re just going to have to work with me. I don’t really know what I’m doing here.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Cas says.

Dean places a kiss on Cas’s cheek before he turns back to the TV and starts the movie. Cas reaches across to grab his hand, intertwining their fingers in the space between them.

“Hey, baby?”

Cas’s head pops up in response to the pet name, there’s a faint smile on his lips. “Yes, Dean?”

“I love you.”

Cas beams at him before replying, “I love you, too.”

Dean turns his head back toward the TV but spends a better part of the rest of the movie sneaking glances at Cas. He indulges the warm feeling in his chest, even if he doesn’t quite have the words for everything yet.

[ererokii]

Line without a Hook || E. Jaeger & J. Kirstein

➳ Jean Kirsten x Fem Reader x Eren Jaeger

Word count: 4,517 Warnings: angst, fluff, unrequited love, cursing ➳ note: this is based off the song Line Without a Hook by Ricky Montgomery! I’ve been thinking this for a long time and I’m super excited by how it came out! Also big thanks to @reddriot​ for betaing!

➳ Synopsis: is love really worth it? Let me say, it’s not always worth it.

You can hold my hand if no one’s home.

Do you like it when I’m away?

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

It starts out simple really. A boy and a girl. Childhood friends, to be precise. Those two are inseparable. Nothing can tear the friends apart, besides their parents, of course. Like two peas in a pod. 

Jean says he knows you like the back of his hand. He truly means that. He knows your favorite boy bands from when you were younger, how many terrible phases you’ve gone through, favorite foods, and places. If he wrote a novel about the things you told him, he would be a renowned author. 

Since kindergarten to now, in the middle of your junior year, you and Jean have been side by side. You told him everything. From random vents and gossiping about the rude girls in your class to how horrible your period cramps were— even though Jean hated hearing about the last, he stuck through it for you.

Only you. 

The pavement that followed the street your house was on is memorable. Jean can recall the amount of times you’ve had races, chalk scribbles covering the grey that would be washed away by the angry neighbors. 

He listens to you as you talk about a kid getting in trouble in your Calculus class, watches how lively your motions are as you speak. Jean can’t help but smile when a laugh slips past your lips and you glance at him. There’s an unknown sparkle in his eyes, one filled with love. 

You haven’t changed one bit, he thinks as he faces back forward, shoving his hands in the front pockets of his jeans. His mind begins to wander as you both continue down the pavement, part of your routine when school ends. 

Your houses are right next to each other. You’ve been with him since you were in diapers. He was there when your first tooth came out, congratulating you, and you were there for him when he finally learned to ride his bike with two wheels instead of three. 

The bubbly lovable five-year-old back then is the same as you are now. 

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

Oh all my emotions

Feel like explosions when you are around

A sigh of disappointment leaves Jean’s lips when he listens to Connie talk about something he has learned over the weekend (something completely stupid— he just doesn’t care). Currently, the students are at lunch, the cafeteria full with loud shouts and random noises. 

“Connie, shut up,” Sasha groans, placing her water bottle on the table, wiping her crumbs off. “No one cares that you finally figured out how to stick a spoon to your nose.”

“What do you mean?! You were the one who showed me!”

The brunette gasps and looks over his way, cream cheeks tinted with an adorable shade of pink, pointing a finger at him. The bickering between the two commence as Jean listens, slightly amused. 

As much as he indulges in their argument, he can't help but wonder where you are. 

It’s not like you to skip lunch, especially without at least letting him know. Did you stay behind to talk to a friend? A teacher? Maybe you went to the bathroom.

But it’s at least 15 minutes in. 

“Sasha,” he speaks up, slicking back his hair. The sound of her name catches her attention, making her look at him. “Have you seen Y/N?”

“Y/N?” she asks in a whisper before her lips curl in a grin, already knowing why he asked. “Do you miss her?”

“Just answer my goddamn question!”

“Wait, what’s going on?” Connie asks, looking between his friends before stopping his gaze on Jean. “Why do you need Y/N?”

“Oh, you know! He lik-”

“Shut up!” Jean shouts, catching the attention of nearby students, his face heating up as his cheeks turn a darker pigment. “Just answer me!”

“If you must know,” she taunts him, twirling a strand of hair from her loose ponytail. “I saw her talking to someone in the hallway. Must be important, she’s been there for quite some time. Might want to be her knight in shining armor and saving her, huh?” she cocks her head to the side, staring at one of the windows in the room, watching as the branches of trees sway from the harsh winds. 

The atmosphere outside was cold, breezes rushing down on anyone who was not inside. The sun was hidden by the thick grey blankets filled with rainwater, waiting to shower the world. The temperature recently has been dropping, mid 50’s at least. The weather was a shock, to say the least. 

“I didn’t know Jean likes her!”

“What do you mean?!” Sasha gasps, turning her body to face her small-minded friend. “It’s only obvious! You must be really stupid then!”

“Well, how could you tell?!”

Before Jean has a chance to interrupt Sasha, she begins to rant. He prefers to stay silent, clasping his hands together in his lap as he lowers his head, finding interest in the marbled tiles of the floor his feet rest on. 

The words that slip past Sasha’s lips reach his ear and out the other. 

It’s easy to tell, Connie. Have you noticed the way he looks at her? Can’t you see the love in his eyes? The way he will actually go out of his way to help her with anything? Here you guys are, two close friends, I thought you would have known about his crush. I’m surprised you didn’t catch on every time he ditched plans with us to go hang out with her. He’s whipped, and you’re too stupid to know it. 

His cheeks turn a shade of pink as his eyes squeeze shut, her words replaying in his head like a broken record player. Each sentence is like a knife stabbing away at his brain, causing the slightest ache to form in his frontal region. 

She’s right. Anything she just said five minutes ago, is completely and utterly correct. 

He can still hear her talking about it to Connie, but he can only focus on three sentences that stick to him like glue. 

Have you noticed the way he looks at her? Can’t you see the love in his eyes? The way he will actually go out of his way to help her with anything?

Memories of him helping you in any possible way come to mind. He can’t recall how many times he has entered class two minutes late because you had so much to carry. 

He stares at you like you’re the only thing worth looking at. It reminds him of those cliche animated movies with hearts in the character's eyes. He’s blinded by his love for you, that he never noticed any signs that you don’t feel the same way about him. His heart races miles per hour when you’re around. Sometimes he worries for himself that maybe, his heart might explode within him. 

“Anyway, lunch has about 20 minutes left...where is she?” Connie mutters, scratching the top of his head.

“I don’t know, but,” Sasha grows quiet, listening to the ongoing thunder from the outside. The lights flicker for a second, a couple of yelps emitting from other students, slightly afraid that the power might go off while school is in session. “The storm is almost here.”

“Y/N!” Connie suddenly yells, pointing in the direction of the door, your body jogging closer to the table. “Where have you been?!”

“Sorry!” you laugh, out of breath as you drop your things on the bench, taking a seat beside Jean. “I got caught up in a conversation with someone! I guess I lost track of time for a bit.”

“I messaged you like four times,” Jean mutters, glancing over at you before looking at the table, playing with the plastic straw that he used to drink out of.

“You did?” you ask, pulling your phone out from your pocket, lips puckering when indeed he did so. “I’m sorry, Jean. I didn’t even feel my phone vibrate.”

“Oh, whatever, who cares! Eat! Or I’ll eat your food!” Sasha yells, pointing a finger at you, a smile gracing her features. 

You laugh along with her as you converse with your peers, the conversation you had replaying in the back of your mind. Jean chooses not to intervene, instead would rather listen. 

The roaring thunder plays in the background, everyone paying no mind to it. What he doesn’t know is that the storm is much closer than Jean could have thought. 

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

Listen close, it’s a no

The wind is a pounding on my back

And I found hope in a heart attack

Oh at last, it is past

Now I’ve got it, and you can’t have it

Another evening, another study session, another day of bottling up his feelings until he can no longer hold them inside.

The storm made its way to shore, raining pouring down and even some hail; not what anyone was expecting. 

Jean mindlessly flips through the pages of his English book, not even paying attention to the words as he checks how many pages are in chapter five. 

“This seems pointless,” he adds with a sigh, tossing the book on your bed along with his highlighter he uses to annotate with. “I should just find a summary online or something, I don’t want to read this.”

“And why is that?” you ask, looking up from your book, placing the hardcover against your thighs. “Is it boring to you?”

“No,” he mutters, rolling onto his back. “It’s stupid. This love crap.”

“Well...it is a romance story, the teacher told us when we got the book. But why do you think it’s dumb?”

“He writes letters for her, and in the end, she ends up rejecting him. I don’t think that’s romantic.”

“And? It’s beautiful on his part,” you close your eyes as you stretch your arms over your head, letting out a grunt. “It’s the fact that he wrote to her every day. It’s like he poured his soul into every word. The words he uses are..literally everything. It makes me swoon over him, and he’s not real. Makes me wonder if someone would do that for me.”

Jean’s head perks up at your words, one of his eyebrows raised in curiosity when he notices the bashful look on your face, eyes averted to the comforter on your bed. “Why do you have that dopey look on your face?”

“Huh?!” your eyes are blown open as you look over at him. “What are you talking about?!”

“I’m talking about that, idiot,” he points at your face, watching your eyes cross faintly to stare at his finger. “You’re acting about that guy in the book.”

The patter of the rain is the only noise that fills the void called silence in your room. His warm eyes don’t leave your face at all, waiting for your answer. You’ve been acting weird ever since you were late to lunch this past week. 

He watches your mouth open as if you’ll say something but close it right away, like you were concealing anything you had to hide.

“...well? Y/N? Are you there?”

“Yeah!” you cough into your elbow, running a hand down your face. “I-- you can’t tell anyone.”

“You know I never tell anyone what we talk about.”

You’re silent, a bit too quiet than usual. You fiddle with your fingers before blurting the words that have been eating away at you. 

Jean’s heart stops for a moment, eyes wide in shock when he processes it. His blood runs cold as he’s unable to move, frozen like a statue. The signals in his brain begged him to respond, but he couldn’t. He could hear the faintest sound of bells ringing in his ears; all noise surrounding him was now drowned out by his thoughts. 

One second.

Two seconds.

Three seconds. 

“You like someone?” he asks in a whisper, barely audible to your ears, but you heard as you nod shyly, biting down on your lip. “Well... who is it?”

“That’s...I can’t say it.”

“Why can’t you?”

“I’m afraid to say it out loud because I don’t want to ruin my friendship with him.”

Friendship? That could be anyone at this point.

I have to figure out who, he thinks as he draws random patterns into the sheets. “Well, tell me about him then. Is he in our grade?” he asks.

“Yeah, he is. He’s in four of my classes.”

Jean was in four of your classes. Math, English, Foreign Language, and Science. 

“That’s it?”

You huff, rolling your eyes. “Can I finish before you interrupt? Thank you.”

You pause momentarily before speaking again.

“He’s stubborn. I’ve noticed that his demeanor changes when it depends on who he is with. He seems like a hardass and looks like he doesn’t want to be bothered, but he seems like a total softie when he’s with people he loves. Not to mention he’s hot...and tall. He’s blunt and straight to the point. He doesn’t bullshit at all. He’s really sweet as well, to me. He always goes out of his way to make sure I’m okay and how my day was. He just..he seems to care for me, and I feel the same way about him.”

Jean takes every word you say into consideration. He’s stubborn, it seems that he doesn’t like to be around people he doesn’t know but loves those he does know. He knows he’s hot. Practically every day he looks at himself in the mirror and thinks about how good he looks.

He’s blunt and straight to the point. He doesn’t bullshit at all. He’s really sweet as well, to me. He always goes out of his way to make sure I’m okay and how my day was. He just..he really seems to care for me, and I feel the same way about him.

Jean can feel his doubt and worry turn into happiness and confidence as you keep on ranting, to which he’s not fully paying attention anymore. He knows it's him. It has always been him.

No one else.

Jean likes you.

And you like Jean, that’s all there is to it. 

“Do you want to tell him?”

“Yeah...” you trail off, scratching the nape of your neck. “I want to tell him on Friday after school. Do you think he’ll like me back?”

“I think he would. How could he not? He would be a total idiot to reject you.”

You hum at his reassurance, placing your hand on his, squeezing gently.

“Thanks, Jean.”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

Darling when I’m fast asleep

I've seen this person watching me

Saying, “Is it worth it? Is it worth it?”

Tell me, is it worth it?

Friday comes, and Jean can hardly wait for school to end. He’s not paying attention, his eyes constantly staring from the whiteboard in the front to the clock that tauntingly ticks slower than usual. 

He bites down on the pink end of his pencil in anticipation, tapping his foot repeatedly on the floor, the noise resonating through the classroom. 

Maybe I should just keep my eyes off the clock, he thinks, lowering his head back to the worksheet their teacher gave the class.

Econ class was a drag. He could care less about the differences in macro and microeconomics, the same with Communism and Capitalism. It’s just a bunch of words that don’t make sense to his brain. 

This was one of the classes he didn’t have with you, the last class. 

Instead of doing his worksheet (luckily, the teacher said it would be for homework if it wasn’t finished), Jean proceeded to think about ways he could tell you his feelings.

He could be old fashioned, tell you how much he adores you and how happy you make him feel when you’re around. How his heart can be heard from the outside of his body, how his hands got warm and clammy, maybe sweaty when he became too nervous.

Or

He could ask you out on a date. Take you somewhere, one of the places you’ve told him in the past that would make a great date for you. He smiles when he thinks about taking you downtown at night, looking at the soft lights that would brighten the streets; loving the sparkle in your orbs as you look around in awe. 

He hums, pleased with himself when he figures out what he’ll do, scratching the back of his ear. 

He wonders if you’re thinking the same thing.

-

You glance at your table partner, looking at his piece of paper before looking down at yours, displeased how his is able to look better than yours. You pick up your eraser, gently wiping the shadings away from your drawing, careful not to crease your paper.

“It’s not that hard you know, you just don’t know how to shade.”

“I know how to shade, Eren,” you reply with a huff, placing your eraser back down. “It’s just...this is a bit harder than usual.”

“All you have to do is follow the markings,” he presses the edge of his drawing pencil against the reference photo both of you are using, tracing the shape of it. “You could honestly just copy the photo, I doubt this woman would even notice.”

You chuckle at his choice of words, shifting in your seat to get comfortable. “I don’t think she would anyway. She just stares at it and calls it an A. I bet for our expressive project, she wouldn’t notice if we copied each other.”

He shakes his head with a smile, the loose strands of his hair swaying with his head movement. “No, she wouldn’t,” he rolls the sleeves of his hoodie to his elbows, grabbing his pencil again. “Then again, we are working on it with each other.”

“Speaking of that, what should we do?”

“Up to you, Y/N. I don’t mind. I’m just trying to pass this stupid class anyway.”

You relish in the silence between you as you gaze at him from your peripheral. You take notice how his hair frames his face effortlessly to the dip in his nose. It’s perfect how it forms to his cupid’s bow to his lips; not too big nor too small either. Just right. 

You clear your throat, scratching at the nape of your neck. “Why not do...stages of love?”

That catches his interest.

“Stages of love?” he asks, moving in his chair to face you, a hand propping his head up. “Elaborate?”

“Like you know...how we gain a crush on someone. We like how they make us feel, and soon we think about them some more. Maybe make little scenarios in our head. Then we gain the crush and want to be around them. You know what I mean, right?”

He’s silent, hues that represent the blue of rivers, boring into your own. At first, you think he hates your idea, but then the corner of his lips curls into his infamous grin. “Yeah, I like that. Did you have anything else in mind?”

“Maybe...rejection?”

“Rejection?” he repeats, a bit shocked at how romantic your words were, to something filled with sadness. “And why would you want to do rejection?”

“W-Well,” you stutter, unsure how you should put it. “Everyone always talks about the good in love but never the bad. And I think it could be done good, you know?”

He hums, scratching away at his chin before nodding. “Yeah, alright. That sounds oddly specific, but I like it. We can honestly get started soon, that way, we can finish faster and not worry about it.”

His smile throws you for a loop, your face heating up as you pick up your pencil, trying to distract yourself. 

“Say, Y/N?”

“Yes, Eren?” you reply a bit too quickly, cursing yourself out internally for sounding too desperate. 

“Can we talk?” his cheeks are a shade of pink, his eyes averted as he plays with one of the strings of his hood, reminding you how a child would distract themselves. The tips of his shoe nudge against yours, barely kicking gently.

“Aren’t we talking right now?”

“No, I mean after school.”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

And in my eyes, there is a tiny dancer

Watching over me, he’s singing, 

Jean storms out of his Econ class with a grin, hands gripping onto the straps of his backpack as he looks down one end of the hallway before going down the other direction. The art room was three classes down his. Usually, Jean will wait right there by the door for you since you take ages to finally leave the classroom. 

When Jean finally reaches the room, he sees that the doors are locked, and the lights inside are off.

Huh, that’s weird, you’re always one of the last to leave, nor are you ever this early. 

He stands there for a few more seconds, peering in through the small glass, and sees nothing before taking a step back and quickly continues to walk down the hall. His legs are quicker, going down the two flights of stairs. 

His eyes frantically search for the yellow shirt you wore, unable to find you anywhere. 

“Sasha!” he calls out once he reaches the end of the stairs, running towards the girl and their friend, who was at the lockers, pulling things she needed to take home for the weekend. 

The brunette looks over her shoulder, stopping her conversation with Connie as she shuts her locker. “Yeah, Jean?”

He pants, leaning on his knees before letting out a deep breath and standing straight up. “Have you seen Y/N?”

She ponders for a while before shaking her head, looking over at Connie, who shakes his head, shrugging. “We haven’t seen her since Art class.”

“You didn’t see where she went at all?”

The events before class ending play in her mind before she gasps, snapping her fingers, pointing up at Jean. “Yeah, I know where she went!”

“...are you going to tell me, or am I going to have to guess?!”

She mocks him for a second before pulling her phone out. “I could have seen her leave with Eren. I think they went to the bench in the back. You know the one I’m talking about?”

He’s taken aback for a moment before shaking his head, retaining the information. “Alright, thanks.”

Why would you even be with Eren right now? You never meet with him after-

“Are we still on for this weekend?!” Connie yells when Jean is making his way down the corridor.

“Yeah, we are!” Jean's voice travels through the air, reaching both of his friends, hands clammy as they’re shoved in the front pocket of his pants. 

The walk to the back courtyard was tiresome. His feet seemed to drag behind him, an aching feeling forming in his gut. Thoughts pounded against his skull repeatedly, trying to force him to stop. He wants to stop, but he has to go.

He has to tell you he loves you. 

He can’t help but smile when you describe the boy you like this week. In his mind and most certainly his heart, he was the king of the world sitting on his high horse as he screamed in victory, letting the whole world know that the person he likes, feels the same way about him. 

The fresh air from the outside meets his nostrils as he deeply inhales, allowing it to enter his body before exiting. The sun is the first thing he meets with as he exits the building, bringing a hand up to shield his eyes away from the harsh light. He mutters something under his breath as he looks around for a second. 

“She’s a,

She’s a lady and I’m just a boy”

His honey orbs finally stop on a bench where you and Eren are seated, that’s not too far away, but his body is hidden from your view. He lets out a sigh of relief, leaves crunching underneath his feet as he walks, not taking long strides, rather walking slow to rethink what he’ll say.

“Y/N, I’ve liked you for a long...no,” he mutters, stopping in his tracks as he looks down at the green grass and leaves, kicking away at them. “I’ve loved- no, that sounds a bit aggressive, goddammit,” he groans, tugging at the roots of his hairs. “Why is this so fucking hard?!” he growls underneath his breath, leaning against the brick wall. 

He never was anything else but honest with you. How could he say it?

What if this ruins your relationship?

...what if you liked Eren?

His breath hitches in his throat when realization dawns on him. His lips part, a soft exhale releasing from within him. His fingers curl around nothing, as if he was holding the air’s hand. The tips of his fingers shake, his whole body stiffening as he stares hard at nothing. 

How could he be so stupid?

It all made sense now. How you stayed behind during lunch that one time without saying anything; in the back of his mind that day, he knew that someone had to be a boy, maybe a girl. Even then, you would always let him know. 

Jean should have known from the beginning that you only saw him as a brother. 

His chest aches as his vision goes blurry, biting down on the inside of his lip to the point where he can taste the bitter metallic on his tongue. He squeezes his eyes shut before opening, wishing he hadn’t at that moment. 

He’s singing

“She’s a, she’s a lady and I am just a line without a hook.”

His heart breaks, stomach-dropping when he sees Eren’s hand brings you closer to his body, lips pressed up against yours; your hand placed on his cheek, cradling his face. Even from where he stands, he can sense the urgency in the kiss, how your bodies move together as one, how your fingers grip onto him like he’ll leave any moment. 

His lower lip quivers for a second, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, clearing his throat. Jean cranes his neck upward, looking at the sky, muttering the words, “Why him?” over and over like a mantra, no other words coming to mind. 

When he closes his eyes, all he can see is you. Not Eren, just you. Those moments where you laugh, cry, or stay silent, those are the moments that flash in his head.

Did he do something to you? Was it something he said?

Did you ever like him at all?

“It’s pointless,” he whispers, pushing himself off the brick wall, immediately making a beeline for the doors. He swallows harshly, legs moving faster than ever, wanting to get out of this hell hole called reality. 

Like every day, you’ll walk down the same pavement you’ve been walking on for years.

Only this time, he’s walking alone. 

Oh, and if I could take it all back

I swear that I would pull you from the tide. 

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

taglist: @sleepysnk @jaegerbomb20​ @reddriot​ @kkiimmberly​ @kingtamakimurder​ @tamasoft​ @byougen​ @spike-this-ass​ @crimsonbows-and-arrows​ @squidonmywall​ @thicmitten​ (message me to be apart of it!)

[carnationcreation]

Can you do Luke Patterson fanfic where the reader is Alex sister and is in the band who’s been in love with Luke all this time but he never noticed her. And ever since they met Julie she has seen them together has gotten jealous.So she hatches up one finally plan to make him jealous to get him to see her . And Luke realized he had been in love with her and confess to her . Sorry if it’s too much this is my first time asking for a request 🥺

TITLE: Unrequited (Luke Patterson x reader)

✌🏻Masterlist Taglist, Requests, and Works in progress!

Requested: Yes!

Prompt/summary:  Reader does one final attempt at getting Luke to notice her.

Word Count: 1,615

Authors note: appear I just write a lot of angst. Again Where’s my Love by SYML is the vibe lol

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day we woke up on the floor of the garage in the year 2020 was the worst day of my life.

Or that’s what I decided at least.

Apparently we had spent the past 25 years in a dark room, with Alex crying for most of that time. The girl who found us, Julie, quickly became our only tie to the real world. We could only be seen playing if she was playing with us. We soon found out that we had unfinished business that we needed to attend to before we could properly cross over to the other side. We figured it was simple. Play the Orpheum and we were done. But getting to the Orpheum was going to be a lot harder than we thought.

Slowly we had started to build up a following on a thing called ‘YouTube’ where people share videos, I never thought such a wide library of videos could exist for free every single day. Practices became a daily thing, though I didn’t know if it was a good thing or a bad thing. 

I really shouldn’t be jealous. Luke has chemistry with everyone he sings with. Alex would kill me if he found out that after all these years I was still crushing on his best friend. I couldn’t help the feeling in my throat when I saw Julie and Luke singing together though... the feeling like I couldn’t breathe. Like all the air was being sucked out of me while I tried to keep the feeling of anger from bubbling over.

Why can’t he look at me like that?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I never meant to get him jealous, because I always thought making crushes jealous was unhealthy and only ever worked in the movies. But as soon as I started only talking with Reggie and Alex at practice Luke started to notice how I didn’t go out of my way to talk to him like I used to.

As time went on I started only singing with Reggie on stage for the harmonies. Every time I would look over afterwards I would see Luke staring at me with an almost blank expression.

The next few days were miserable for me.

My only desire then was to go up to him and tell him why I had been avoiding him. That I had seen every glance, smirk, smile, and laugh he and Julie had shared and say it was breaking my heart in two. I just had to watch in silence. The fear of causing drama within the band had taken precedent over my unrequited love. 

I never meant for it to be taken this far. After Caleb branded us I truly began to wonder if my place in the band really meant anything to anyone. My feelings poured out over a page as I explained everything to them in a letter. A stupid letter that I didn’t know if I actually was going to deliver or not. 

My worst fears soon became a reality after I saw their interaction outside of Luke’s house on his birthday.

Tears fell out of my eyes as I slipped the letter into his songwriting notebook and poofed out of the garage. I knew they would find it. I knew my brother would know the first place to look for me, so I avoided it.

I stood in the alleyway behind the Orpheum, tears falling down my face as I held onto my brother’s sweatshirt he had given me a few days prior. Hopefully I could still keep it.

“Are you ready?”

I turned around and saw Caleb standing in all his elaborate glory, “I guess so.”

He smirked, “Why so hesitant little dove?”

“Um,” I mumbled, a shiver went down my spine at his awkward nickname, “I’m just going to miss them.”

“Miss them? You’re going to miss them? Oh (Y/n), they haven’t even noticed you were gone. You’ve got nothing to lose.”

Tears began to form in my eyes. Breathing became hard as I realized I had been sitting here for hours, and no one came yet.

“Poor (Y/n), in love with a boy who doesn’t even notice her. A brother who was rejected by even his parents, and a best friend who doesn’t even notice her feelings. You can leave all that behind, just shake my hand.”

I stood there, debating on if I really wanted to give it all up. Did I really get a choice in this? I slowly lifted my hand, still hesitating.

“(Y/n), look around. They haven’t even come for you yet, and I’m sure that rat Willie already told them what you were doing. They just don’t care-”

“That’s not true!”

I turned around and saw my band running towards me.

“(Y/n) don’t listen to him? He’s manipulating you,” Alex said.

Tears fell down my face as Caleb grabbed my shoulder, “You’re too late. (Y/n) just look at them. They didn’t even notice as you drifted further and further away.”

My eyes flickered up, Luke locked eyes with me. Tears were forming in his eyes, “(Y/n) please don’t do this.”

I looked back down at the ground.

Julie spoke up, “(Y/n), you really don’t realize how much you contribute to this band. We all care about you so much.”

“I doubt she wants to hear from you,” Caleb scoffed, “Seeing as you stole the one thing she most wanted away.”

The boys looked at each other confused but the look on Julie’s face told me that she knew exactly what Caleb meant.

“(Y/n) I promise you, Luke and I are just best friends. I’m so sorry you felt like you weren’t important to us anymore,” Julie said.

Luke looked up at me but I tried not to meet his gaze.

“(Y/n),” Alex said, “You’re my sister. I can’t lose you too. Please.”

Tears ran freely down my face as I pulled myself away from Caleb. Luke ran forward and caught me as I began to fall.

Caleb let out a frustrated yell and disappeared. I didn’t even bother to look up as I sobbed into my hands.

“I’m so sorry,” Luke whispered to me. Alex pulled everyone into a group hug.

“Guys I’m so sorry,” I sobbed.

“This isn’t your fault,” Reggie said.

I brought my hands down to wrap around Luke’s shoulders, “I just didn’t feel good enough. I wanted to know if you guys really cared. I’m so sorry I should have said something.”

“We’re just happy we got here in time,” Alex said, he ran a hand through my hair, “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

My tears came to a slow stop, and eventually we began to walk home.

“Guys, I’m taking (Y/n) somewhere. We’ll catch up.”

The guys waved as Luke grabbed my hand and pulled me in a different direction. It soon became clear where he was taking me. 

“Do you remember this place?” he asked.

“Barely,” I said. I looked around the park I had always gone to, it had changed so much since 1995, “They tore the gazebo down.”

He looked over to where the rickety white structure used to be, a bathroom area was there now.

“I remember, you used to always go there after there was a fight at your house.”

I nodded, “Quiet, secluded, free to go to. Can’t tell you how many songs I wrote here.”

He pulled me over to sit on the benches near the playground. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he said. 

I looked up at the clouds, trying to get the answer straight in my head, “I just… I had seen how you looked at her. I wanted you to look at me like that. Once I started to pull away, no one seemed to notice. Caleb offered me his help, he said I’d be famous…”

“What made you hesitate?”

“I realized… I didn’t want a million admirerors, I just wanted one. Nothing could compare to that.”

I jumped as he reached over to grab my hand, bringing it over to sit in his lap as he covered it in both of his, “I want to be that person.”

“You always were.”

He smiled. He brought my hand up and placed a kiss gently on my knuckles. In a quick moment of bravery I leaned over and kissed his cheek quickly.

He placed both his hands on my cheeks before pulling me into a real kiss. The boy I thought I had lost was kissing me. The kiss I had always dreamed of but thought I could never have. 

We both pulled away breathing heavily. I looked up and giggled at his swollen lips and tousled hair knowing I probably looked the same. 

“I’m sorry it’s taken so long for me to say this. I love you (Y/n). I’ve loved you since the day I met you, I loved you after we died, and I loved you every moment till now. I guess the only reason why I didn’t do anything is I was so scared of you not liking me back, or how your brother would react.”

I sighed as he rubbed his thumb across my cheek, “How do you think he’ll react?”

“He told me while we were looking for you I should’ve asked you out weeks ago. He knows,” He laughed.

The sun had started to set, the light illuminated him making him look ethereal. I pulled him into another quick kiss, “I wish I had done this sooner.”

“What? The kiss or trying to sell your soul to a dead magician?”

I laughed, “Either.”

He smiled and wrapped his arm around me, “Don’t do the second one again anytime soon.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist: @thebookwormlife @talksoprettyjjx  @coolreallyfuzzystudentuniverse  @igotabadfeelingabouteverything @larrystylinson-sus @lovesanimals @aunicornmademedoit @thexhotmess @ssprayberrythings @registerednursejackie @peachyxdream @catieiscute2001 @julieandthephantomsblogduh @fangirling-allday @ashleyleblancx @alltimekp @wcnderwoo @unipanda1006 @disgustedchild @aberette13 @dpaccione @whyworry27 @number-0-iz @musicconversedance @owlgirl1209 @angelxfics @hamdehlesmis @solophantomsmultis @marinettepotterandplagg @idkanymoremansstuff @carleywhittaker @spooky-season-bitch @sunsetcurve-h @peresphoncs @lolychu  @joshy-obx @mochamiilk @starenemy @caitsymichelle13 @kiss-themoongoodbye @noncannonships @cherrybombboom @etherealexsistence @itskindyl @heidimortensen123 @starkeysgirl @nicolewithasoul @chenellearose @voguesir 

[taephilia]

lost (myself) & found (you)

pairing: jeon jungkook x gn!reader

genre: fluff, soulmate au, based off of kimi no na wa

warnings: one (1) swear word

word count: 2,120

a/n: i saw this quote from the movie and inspiration just struck and i haven't been able to get it out of my head since. ofc i wrote this for jungkook since he's a weeb and said he would also want to hear bells ring when he meets his soulmate <3 also this is not edited lol i'll come back to it later, i just wanted to get this out

"Once in a while when I wake up, I find myself crying. The dream I must’ve had I can never recall. But… the sensation that I’ve lost something, lingers for a long time after I wake up." - Tachibana Taki, Kimi No Na Wa (2016)

Jungkook isn’t sure how long he’s felt like this—felt like something is missing, something important, something that his heart just can’t seem to let go of even if his brain has already forgotten. He knows that he dreams of whatever it is. He recalls scenes as he goes about his day; a loud laugh here, a brush of a hand against his there. People that he’s never seen before walking by him in a city he’s never been to, music playing on the radio that he’s never heard, a family that he comes home to that he doesn’t recognize at all. It’s all very strange and Jungkook is starting to wonder if maybe the late night ramen he’s built up a habit of eating has gone bad or maybe the unhealthy amounts of salt in it are the cause behind this. Because it was all fun and games until Jungkook’s heart starts to ache, like it’s calling out to someone that his brain can’t even conjure up an image for. Someone that he would search the ends of the cosmos for, someone that, whenever he feels like he gets close to them, slips right through his fingers like grains of sand. But he shakes it off whenever the feeling comes and ignores the heavy feeling in his chest in favor of paying attention to that day’s classes. If he had somehow found his soulmate, it definitely wouldn’t be someone in his hometown in the countryside.

Soulmate. That’s who his grandfather had told him he’s been dreaming about ever since Jungkook confessed almost two months ago about the reason behind his ever-present furrowed brows and faraway look in his eyes. He says that it had happened to him when he was around Jungkook’s age but, like most dreams, he’s forgotten who it was. He then went on to talk about the red thread of fate and that’s when Jungkook started tuning out. It’s a nice concept to think about when you’re a child—a red string tied around your pinky that connects you to the person that you’re destined to be with—but it’s just a myth and Jungkook doesn’t have time to think about things that aren’t real. Not when he barely has the time to think about the things that are real, like college entrance exams and graduating from high school.

So he buries his head in his books and pours every last drop of blood, sweat, and tears into his studies to get into his dream college in Seoul. The yearning in his heart doesn’t go away but it’s eclipsed by the pure exhaustion that he feels at the end of every day. And, like most dreams, he forgets.

Jungkook is 23 when he seriously begins to wonder whether or not he’s going crazy. He had thought he was going over the deep end while in college but hearing bells go off? Now that takes the cake. It happens at random; he never knows when the bells in his head will ring (and Jungkook knows that only he can hear them because nobody around him ever gives any sort of indication that they’ve heard them) no matter how much he tries to prepare for it. He checks his surroundings every day, eyes scanning over the crowds of people weaving around him in Seoul, but it’s no use. The only consistent location that they seem to chime in is when he’s on the metro and even then, it’s on random days, at random times, and not always at the same stop.

He’s not the type to go chasing after fairy tales, or at least, he isn’t anymore. He doesn’t have time to think hard and long about what these imaginary bells could mean, not when he has a job to do and people to impress and money to be made. And his grandfather died during his second year of college so the only conversation of “soulmates” that occurs now are the ones he has with himself in his head and the memories of their conversations years ago. But as fate would have it, Jungkook took a couple of days off to get an early start to the weekend and he is just itching for an adventure. So when he hears the bells go off while he’s making his way to his connecting train, he closes his eyes for a brief moment and puts himself into the hands of fate.

Jungkook allows his feet to carry him where they want, observing his surroundings and keeping an eye out for any person who gives any sort of indication to hearing something that they shouldn’t be hearing. He climbs up the stairs and out of the station, not giving any attention to the people who side-eye him for standing still on a bustling sidewalk, but looks down at his hand instead. In particular, at his pinky, which feels like there’s something squeezing at it. Like… like a thread that’s been tied snugly around it.

The red thread of fate, a voice in his head whispers to him and Jungkook almost chuckles out loud at the thought. And then almost laughs out loud again because, although he doesn’t believe in soulmates, his actions say otherwise. Because as much as Jungkook doesn’t believe in soulmates… Well, the thought of them and the red thread of fate being real is nice, isn’t it? Someone that you’re destined to be with, connected to by a string that can tangle and stretch but will never fray, keeping you tied to them for all eternity. It’s a comforting thought, especially when he thinks of his extremely lacking love life that comes with his high standards and fear of rejection.

Jungkook passes by a bakery during his fate-led walk and just as he’s considering stopping in to buy something, he hears the bells again. A light sound, one that could be mistaken for a phone notification, but one that he knows very well. But Jungkook’s soulmate must be as used to the sound as he is because no one around him gives any sort of indication that they’re also in search of him. And after an hour and a half of walking around a part of the city that he isn’t too familiar with, he’s ready to call it quits for the night. So Jungkook makes his way to the nearest metro station and gets on a train home.

Of course, that’s when he hears the bells again.

He looks up from his phone and around the crowded train but nobody has been able to move since the doors closed. And if it were someone near him, he would have heard them before. There’s a flash out of the corner of his eye and when Jungkook looks up and out the window of the sliding doors, he sees a pair of eyes staring back. A pair of eyes that are not his but in fact belong to someone in a train traveling right next to his. They stare right at him and mirror his own when they widen at the exact same time as his. But just as soon as Jungkook finds you, he loses you just as quickly when your train goes in a different direction.

Jungkook spends the entire day the next day looking for you. He manages to cross off everything on his “things to do when I’m in Seoul” bucket list that he’s been adding on to for the past 10 years. His feet hurt, his wallet feels significantly lighter than when he first left his apartment, and he’s wondering how much weight he lost from walking what feels like the entire expanse of Seoul three times over. And even after all that, he hasn’t heard the bells. Not once.

And it’s at this point, when Jungkook decides to eat dinner at his favorite ramen shop before calling it a night, that he begins to wonder if he had missed his chance last night. Not like it was much of a chance considering the fact that you were on a different train and he had no way of getting to you. But fate is cruel, isn’t that what some people say? Maybe his thread is just so tangled, so frayed, that it’ll take a lifetime before he’s able to get another glimpse at you. And Jungkook just isn’t that patient.

He can barely even remember what you look like anymore. Maybe it’s the hunger eating away at his stomach and the aching of his feet but as he eats his ramen, he can only recall vague details about you. Like how he wants to drown in your eyes, how soft your skin looks even through two dirty train door windows, and how he thinks your shiny hair probably smells nice - like vanilla or peaches or something. But your face? Absolutely nothing. It’s like he blacked out the second he looked up at you last night.

Jungkook leans back in his seat as he sips at his water, staring out the window of the shop as if you would walk past right that second. But you don’t. So Jungkook throws a couple of bills down onto the table for a tip and heads out, a sigh leaving his lips when he looks around but doesn’t hear any bells. Now that he’s had a chance to sit down and eat, he feels a bit more rational and more determined to find you—but that can wait until tomorrow after he’s had a good night’s sleep. It’s a bit later in the evening so there’s barely anyone around him as he makes his way to the nearest metro station that will take him home. Jungkook is just about to descend the stairs when something makes him stop. He’s not really sure what it is that he stops for; the bus honking on the street beside him or the group of friends laughing as they walk by him? Or perhaps it’s the person at the bottom of the stairs, their eyes looking down as they climb up, but Jungkook just knows that it’s you.

Well, he doesn’t actually know. He’s pretty sure it’s you. It feels like it’s you. But is that fate talking or just his hopeful heart? Jungkook decides not to say anything and slowly walks down the stairs. The bells will tell him if he’s right. Your eyes glance up and meet his and Jungkook sees them widen, but like him, you don’t say anything. Are you waiting to hear your own bells?

He shoves his hands deep into the pocket of his hoodie, eyes quickly darting away from yours to stare holes into the ground as he keeps walking. His heart beats faster with every step and he has to resist the urge to just stare at you point blank because he needs to know and-

He hears the bells. And it’s like a weight is taken off of his shoulders.

But he keeps walking. And you keep walking. And now Jungkook is panicking because why the fuck is he still walking? You’re his soulmate, he found you, so why isn’t he stopping? Jungkook tries to get his feet to stop moving, to just turn around and call out to you but he can’t. What would he even say? ‘Hey, you’? He doesn’t even know your name. ‘I think you’re my soulmate’? How disgustingly cliche. What if you don’t even care that he’s your soulmate? What if you’re already seeing someone? What if he’s the only one that can hear the bells for you and you hear them for someone else? What if-

“Um, excuse me?”

Jungkook almost trips on the last step from how fast he turns around at the sound of your voice. His hands feel clammy but he keeps them in his pocket otherwise you’d be able to see how they’re shaking ever so slightly. He drags his eyes up to yours and suddenly, every bit of anxiety he felt is suddenly gone. Is this what it’s supposed to feel like?

“Have we met before? You seem really familiar.”

You’re at the top of the stairs now but you step down a few steps, as if you want to get closer. Jungkook climbs back up a few steps because he does want to get closer. There’s an easy smile on his face as he says, “Found you.”

He isn’t sure where it came from. He isn’t even exactly sure what he means. But it feels like the right thing to say, like something that he’s vaguely remembering from a dream he had a long time ago. And judging from the matching smile on your own face, you know what Jungkook means.

“Took you long enough.”

[adamwatchesmovies]

The Good Son (1993)

While I didn't enjoy this film, that doesn't mean you won't. No matter what I say, the people involved in this project did it: they actually made a movie. That's something to be applauded. With that established...

Dammit, I already used “Good Son, Bad Movie” the last time I wrote a review for this thriller. I could wrack my brain to think of something clever but that pretty much summarizes it. The Good Son brings nothing new to the “Bad Seed” story. Its characters are flat and what’s set up doesn’t pay off in any satisfying way. This means you have the entire movie figured out as soon as the main characters are introduced.

10-year-old Mark Evans (Elijah Wood) is still grieving his recently deceased mother when he's sent to live with his aunt (Wendy Crewson) and uncle (Daniel Hugh Kelly) while his father is away on business. Befriending their son, Henry (Macaulay Culkin), Mark soon realizes the boy pretends to be nice and well-mannered but is actually a cruel sadist obsessed with death.

The story goes that in the early '90s, Hollywood felt like the time was right for a “classy” thriller about children and evil. Macaulay Culkin was cast as the malicious kid as a way to show audiences that he had greater range than they had seen previously. The problem is that Caulkin didn’t fit this part. Even if you don’t see his face and flashback to a Christmas favorite, you don’t feel intimidated. I'm not saying that because there are few things as non-threatening as a 10-year-old. To compensate, the film takes many cheap shortcuts. Rather than make the film feel darker and edgier, these actually make it feel uninspired. We see Henry smoke but that's only shocking because it's something a little kid shouldn’t do. You see it as a tactic to provoke a reaction. There’s of course the obligatory curse word thrown in to make the sensitive mothers in the audience clutch their pearls and the standard stuff you’d expect out of this movie - the kind of bad behavior anyone with a brain would notice and bring up in a family therapy session. Henry wears creepy masks around the house. He has a shed in the woods where he collects animal bones, hangs dolls with nooses and has built a lethal crossbow. Most important of all, he speaks in a tone that screams “evil” because he never shows any vulnerability or emotion and delivers all of his lines as if they come from a teleprompter. I’m not saying that Culkin gives a bad performance but his dialogue clearly comes from an adult. You never buy it.

Despite all of these issues, I’m going to say that the biggest problem with The Good Son is that everything surrounding the titular child is so thin and poorly written. The assumption is that Henry’s parents are too busy grieving over their dead baby (I’ll give you three guesses of what happened) to recognize what’s hiding in plain sight. That theory doesn’t hold up. Shouldn’t Aunt Susan be so paranoid about her remaining son and daughter (she’s played by Quinn Culkin) that she’d never let them out of her sight? Instead, the kids are free to do whatever they want all day. I know this story takes place in a small town but it just doesn’t feel right. No, Henry gets away with everything because she’s too busy standing on the edge of a cliff all day (I bet you can see where that’s going too), as if she’s a 15th-century maiden waiting for her pirate husband to sail back after months away. Even with all of these “factors” hindering Mark’s believability… there’s no reason he shouldn’t be able to expose Henry for who he is. Over and over, you think director Joseph Ruben (who also directed the lousy Sleeping with the Enemy the previous year) will use the tools he has on hand. The child psychologist who surely won't be fooled by the pre-teen's facade, the numerous incidents around town, the way a child who is still grieving his mother might actually act out and misbehave… but no. It’s nothing but squandered potential.

Upon release,The Good Son was criticized for the way it took a child star and placed him in a film decidedly not appropriate for children. I’m not sure that's a fair criticism. If the movie had been really good, no one would’ve complained, particularly with the MPAA rating making it clear that this movie isn’t meant for young audiences. But it isn’t good, and when you combine that with the way it misuses its big names, The Good Son is just a waste. (February 25, 2022)