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thefanficmonster · 3 years ago

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Time And Time Again

Dream x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: FLUFF, Romance, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Basically a rundown of some of the most recent cute moments brought to you by the most adorable will-they-won’t-they couple: Y/N and Dream.

Requested by Anon. Hi dear! Thank you so much for your wonderful request, it really made my day when I received it! I hope I captured what you wanted and what you had in mind in the fic and I hope you enjoy the read! This is my first time writing for Dream so I hope I don’t mess it up hehe. Love, Vy ❤

“I don’t wanna go in the cave!“ Y/N squeals in terror when she realizes that in order to make progress in the game and continue moving onward with the story, she has to walk Blake through the dark, dingy and danger-ridden cave in Outlast 2. The gang’s all there with her on a Discord call to keep her company, knowing she’s a scaredy cat underneath that tough girl exterior. And being the scaredy cat she is while also having a preference for horror games has made Friday nights very interesting for her and her friends: her, Clay, George and Sapnap sit on a Discord server while she streams whatever horror game she had planned for the evening to her close to her thousands of viewers.

“Don’t worry, Y/N! I’ll come with you, imma hold your hand the whole time.“ Clay volunteers wholeheartedly without a second to waste.

Much to his disappointment, however, Y/N’s reply to that is: “Not until you go wash off all that cheeto dust that’s all over your fingers.“

Clay gasps dramatically, “How DARE you? I offer you help and comfort and this is the thanks I get? I hope one of those heretics in teaches you a lesson!”

While the pair are now in a full-on ‘heated’ dispute on their manners and politeness, bringing back things they did wrong as far back as three years ago, George and Sapnap are just connecting the dots silently.

“Wait, Y/N...“ George is the one to finally speak up, “How’d you know he’s eating cheetos?”

Taking a momentary break from the bickering, Y/N reassumes her more sweet tone of voice as he addresses him, “He freaking raided my cabinets and has eaten all my snacks already! He’s only been here for two hours, damn it!”

“Don’t make it sound like I inhaled a mountain of snacks in two hours! You literally had only two bags of snacks - meant for one person, mind you!“ Clay argues back, neither him nor Y/N realizing that this accidental outing will send their fandoms in a fit.

Of course, people hang out at their friends’ all the time, nothing weird there. This wouldn’t have been such a big deal to anyone if Sapnap didn’t say:

“How come Clay has the privilege of coming over to place and George and I don’t?“

Oh boy...

* * *

“Hi everyone! I know you guys couldn’t care less for an intro so Imma get right into it...“ Y/N says, all seemingly in one breath, “You see this masked man next to me? This tree of a man right here? Yes? Good, well judging by that poorly made cardboard mask he’s wearing - curtsey of yours truly - you probably already know who he is. If not, meet Dream, aka Clay, aka the raincloud above my parade.“

That specific laugh echoes throughout the room as the said tree-of-a-man wraps an arm around the significantly smaller girl’s shoulders, pulling her closer till their sides collide, “She loves me, trust me, she does.”

“Only when you bring me food though.“ She corrects him, wiggling his shoulders to see if she could set herself free from his grip but relaxing in his embrace when she realizes she won’t be going anywhere unless he willingly lets her go.

Clay tilts his head to the side to look at her through the holes poked into the mask before lifting his free arm to reveal the plastic bag he’s been holding all this time. “Oh, well then I wonder what I’ve got over here...”

“Oh my God, Panda Express! You’re the best, Clay.“ She squeals, grabbing him by the collar of his hoodie and pulling him down while she simultaneously pushes up on her toes to place a kiss on his cheek which is a tiny bit exposed to her between the mask and the hood he’s got over his head.

Before the man could even recover, he finds himself empty handed, having lost the girl and having lost the bag of food to the girl.

That kiss was worth it though.

* * *

“Ok, so I’ve seen this ‘my girlfriend does my makeup’ challenge going around and since I’m single as all hell, I got my best friend Y/N here to do my makeup.“ Clay points to Y/N who’s holding a makeup bag in one hand and is giving him a very disappointed look, “Judging by the look on her face, she’s not at all impressed but I promise to make her a bit more excited to be here in editing.“

“Of course I’m unimpressed, this is the troll video of troll videos!“ She complains, throwing her arms up, “Sure I’ll do your makeup and get a kick out of it myself but none of them will see it!“ She points to the camera, “None of them will know what amazing makeup artist skills I’ve got.“

This leaves Clay speechless for a moment, uncertain of how to reply to her statement before just deciding to say: “Well, at least you’ll be getting a kick out of it, that’s all that matters to me.”

“Aww...“ Y/N bats her eyelashes at the camera as her bottom lip forms an emotional pout, “Please don’t be so sweet to me after I just verbally kicked your ass. You always do that and make me feel like the meanest person in the world.“

“Aww Y/N, I’m so sorry.“ He says, sounding genuinely apologetic as he wraps his arms around the girl that’s tiny in comparison to him, bringing her closer to him with his tight hug.

“YOU’RE DOING IT AGAIN!“

* * *

“Hey Clay, I bought lunch on the way so I hope you’re-” Walking into her friend’s recording room abruptly, Y/N finds herself face to face with his webcam, the light next to which is glowing, suggesting the device is on and she’s currently on the screens of the thousands of people watching Dream’s stream. His mask is on - the one she made for him - of course, but she can still feel the aura of him smiling, relieving her of the worry that he’ll be irritated by her walking in like that - unannounced and without knocking. To be fair, they never announced to one another when they’d be stopping by and by this point in their friendship they have also stopped knocking too. “You’re streaming, huh?”

“Yup!“ The word is said in such a teasing manner she almost allows herself to blush, ��What you got there tho?“

“Chipotle.“ She answers shortly, “And I’m starving so can we please turn your stream into a Mukbang?“ She furrows her brows as she inspects what’s on his computer screen, looking at a comment section instead of the usual screen of a game she’s used to seeing. “What are you doing, anyway?“

Looking back at his screen for a brief moment before turning back to her, Clay replies, “Oh, just reading mean comments, as one does to boost their self-esteem.”

The flash of anger he sees on Y/N’s face is most certainly not what he was inspecting to see. Mockery, yes. Humor, yes. Faux sympathy followed by some mean comments of her own, definitely. But he anger he did not see coming at all.

“Who’s talking shit about you? I’ll end them!“ Putting the plastic bag of delicious food aside, forgetting all about it in the process, Y/N grabs a chair and drags it over next to Clay’s so she too can look at his screen.

And that boy has never felt so much adoration for his best friend. Their fans - and especially their shippers - would’ve lost it if they had been able to see the look he was giving her.

* * *

(back to the ‘girlfriend/best friend does my makeup vid’)

“Ok, so what kind of look do you want me to give you?“ Y/N asks as she sits down on the stool in front of Clay, her makeup products placed on the dining table which is to her right.

“You ask me as though I know what I want.“ Clay laughs, the sticker of his mask floating above his face, following his movements as to keep his features hidden, “Just do the look you do on yourself everyday. It looks really cute on you, who knows, I might be able to pull it off too.“

“Sure thing.“ She smiles at her friend’s compliment, “Just stand still, ok?“

“Yes, ma’am.“

* * *

“Y/N, no! Stop!“ Clay warns her via the Discord call while the two are streaming Minecraft together alone for once, “Not another word!“

“But I really do feel bad!“ Y/N whines in response, “Why don’t you allow me to apologize?“

“Because there’s nothing to apologize for!“ He says, clearly done with the conversation, “I willingly gave you my jacket, you didn’t ask for it.“

“And now you’ve got a cold because of it!“ She continues arguing her case, “The least I can do is come over to take care of you.“

“I don’t need a pity nurse, thank you very much.“ Clay bites back, “But your company would be nice. Though I don’t want you to catch whatever cold I have.“

“I’d catch any cold for you, Clay.“ She replies teasingly - with a ton of honesty underneath that teasing.

Honesty both her and Clay are aware of. As well as the mob of people watching their streams right now.

~ ~ ~ And so the snowball effect continues with little moments sprinkled throughout their online presences that make the snowball of shipping get bigger and bigger. Every now and then, both Y/N and Clay let little bits of their true adoration and admiration for the other slip through. And time and time again do those moments send their fans in a frenzy.

Rightfully so.

@kia-isabelle

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bungoubookclub · 4 years ago

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BUNGOU STRAY DOGS & The Art of its Characters

SPOILERS AHEAD!!

As an artist and casual manga reader I tend to be picky with my choice of reads, though I've bent my standards every now and then, Bungou Stray Dogs is a manga that I find absolutely exceptional-- no surprise considering it's one of my favorite series. An interesting story, beautiful and striking artwork, and an amazing cast of characters.

Written by Kafka Asagiri and illustrated by the talented Harukawa35, the story follows Nakajima Atsushi, an orphan who has a life-changing encounter with a mysterious man named Dazai Osamu, and through an unforeseen turn of events, ends up becoming an agent at The Armed Detective Agency-- an organization that employs skillful individuals with supernatural abilities. From there Atsushi makes friends and foes alike, and tries to find the purpose of his life.

It's formulaic premise of "young protagonist becomes affiliated with organization and battles other organizations", reminiscent of most shounen titles, is where most of its similarities with that demographic end. Instead of expanding its world and delving into lore, the series focuses on its characters, their growth, and their relationships with the world, each other, and themselves, befitting of a seinen title. It has a unique gimmick to its characters as well--that being that their namesakes are real-world authors and literary pioneers.

Kafka's background in literature credits their adaptation of these literary figures into characters, making good use of their analytical and writing skills in interpreting the authors and their works into characters with abilities that pay homage to their namesake's famous works. Their skill as a writer is nothing to be looked over either, having written 8 novels, 2 light novels, and co-wrote one screenplay-- specifically for the series' film, "DEAD APPLE".

Its gimmick lends itself to the characters especially, often making references to the author or their works through their personality or character design, and becomes the foundation for the characters's overall story.

The character Dazai Osamu, for example, is a suicide-maniac determined to die a painless death, preferrably with a lover to accompany him to the other side. This is a direct reference to the real-life Dazai, who had attempted multiple suicides, one attempt being with his wife, however, he had survived while his wife did not. Dazai's character also meditates plenty about morals and ethics and what it truly means to be a human being, depressing over the fact that he will never probably be considered "human" by society's standards; his real-life counterpart's famous novel, No Longer Human, is a meditation on human society and what it truly means to be a human, and how to fit into the mold of what we generally deem as "human"--it also happens to be the name of Dazai's ability, which allows him to completely nullify any other ability through physical contact, rendering the once supernatural ability user into a regular human.

Their abilities work as great metaphors as well, and Francis Scott Fitzgerald, the leader of an enemy organization known as The Guild, is a good example of this. The Great Gatsby is one of the most notable works his real-life counterpart has written, the novel's themes focusing on wealth and criticising achieving "the american dream"; the character's ability, "The Great Fitzgerald", enhances his physical strength and prowess depending on the value of the items he exchanges it for, be it either cash or objects. This quite literal metaphor ties with how the character sees the value of people through their economic and social status, and becomes one of the driving forces behind his later character arc. From this we can determine a cruel and heartless man, but one who values hard work and ambition, stopping at nothing to achieve what he wants.

Aside from the characters themselves, some of their relationships and interactions are also influenced by their real-life counterpart's relations with contemporaries, as well as the time period during which they were active.

The real-life Akutagawa Ryuunosuke and Nathaniel Hawthorne, for example, have opposing views on religion, specifically Chrisitanity; Hawthorne's novel, The Scarlet Letter, deals with the themes of sin and repentance through Christian faith, while Akutagawa's "O-Gin" is a historical fiction that takes place during the edo period and reflects on the spread of Christianity to the people of Japan and how the paranoia of the government manifests, it's also noted that during his final moments while reading the Bible, he claims that he can believe in the devil, but not in the existence of a God. In the manga, during a confrontation on the port, the characters Akutagawa and Hawthorne exchange lines of dialogue, a notable taunt coming from Akutagawa, "Irmão'', being a direct reference to the ancient ministers who have introduced Christianity to edo period Japan.

The characters are intensely rich in personality and humanity, showing that not every character is strictly black or white, Dazai and Tanizaki Junichiro--another member of the Detective Agency--are great examples of this; Dazai's character is a mystery, and is, personally, very hard to break down. He is a man who has shown to have very flexible morals and ethics, but is also extremely loyal and attempts to be a goodhearted person. Relatively, Tanizaki is led to be believed that he is a docile and kind person--a running gag in the show being that he is very shy-- but is willing to commit any atrocities for the well-being of his younger sister, including murder. He puts his and his loved one's interests first, and that nearsightedness can put him and others around him in danger.

Besides the written aspect about the characters, the designs done by Harukawa35 are so beautifully crafted to convey their person through a glance. Their clothes, physical features, shapes, color palettes, even down to their silhouettes are uniquely distinct from one another and feel very personal to that character. Here are some of my favorite examples:

Atsushi's belt, which gives his silhouette a sort of "tail", referring to his ability which allows him to transform into a tiger. His purple/gold irises are striking visual cues that allude to his supernatural ability as well.

Akutagawa's billowing cloak; aside from it's practical use for his ability, it also gives him a distinctive silhouette, along with the ruffles of his shirt and the cuffs of his sleeve that contrast the sharp edges of Rashoumon.

Margaret Mitchell's outfit which, although impractical in a battle, conveys her character of a southern belle very well. Her soft, bright color palette compliments the design of her partner, Hawthorne, who mostly dons darks and greys. Similarly, the soft and round shapes abundant in her design contrasts that of Hawthorne, who is sleek, angular, and sharp by comparison.

Nakahara Chuuya's overall design, which characterizes him perfectly (accurate considering the fact that he was the most difficult character to conceptualize, according to Harukawa). The dark colors of his outfit contrast the bright orange of his hair and blue eyes, giving the idea that despite his position as an executive in the Port Mafia, his personality is as wild and stark as his features. The billowing cloak gives his silhouette a sense of dominance to make up for his small frame, broadening his shoulders and making him appear bigger. And accessories such as his hat, gloves, and choker are all very symbolic to important aspects about his story:

the hat being a gift from Arthur Rimbaud along with the chain accenting it, possibly taken from Paul Verlain;

The gloves covering his palms as he never uses his fists in battle, and only removing them when he becomes possessed by Arahabaki;

And the choker symbolises his loyalty to Mori Ougai and the Port Mafia, for which he is called a "Dog of the Mafia" by Dazai.

And speaking of designs, the various rivals and partners in the series have not only great complementing visual designs, but chemistry, story, and writing as well. Rivals/Partners such as Soukoku (Dazai and Chuuya), Shin Soukoku (Atsushi and Akutagawa), and Mori Ougai and Fukuzawa Yukichi-- the leaders of the main opposing organizations, the Port Mafia and the Detective Agency, respectively--all have amazingly distinct contrasts in terms of visual cues, my personal favorite being Shin Soukoku's black and white theme, as seen in their contrasting color palettes, outfits, and personalities.

I could go on about the Rivals' various dynamics and stories, Character analyses, and such and such, but @bsd-bibliophile has made much better analyses and are very detailed and more refined in terms of composition and content (I would not be able to touch upon Atsushi's themes of existentialism without having to delve into the author's works and the character's story, much less with any finesse, my skill level is nowhere near that standard :'))), so go check their blog out for further in-depth reading!

To wrap it up, Bungou Stray Dogs is a great manga with not only fantastic writing in its story, but in its characters as well. To be able to convey rich, layered stories through people has always been the reason I've wanted to work with Characters and more specifically, Storytelling. This series has rekindled my passion for Storytelling and has made me appreciate how important and fantastic Literature is as well (seriously, to be able to paint images in your mind and make people think and feel through words alone is a skill that I can only dream to achieve).

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thegreenwolf · 5 years ago

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(This post was originally posted on my blog at https://thegreenwolf.com/its-okay-to-not-hustle/)

There’s this meme going around Facebook right now, saying “If you don’t come out of this quarantine with a new skill, your side hustle started, or more knowledge, you never lacked time. You lacked discipline.” Thankfully multiple people have already skewered it, but it continues to be shared around by the sort of person who is trying to one-up everyone else, or who’s just plain clueless–or, for that matter, just trying to guilt you into buying whatever they’re selling.

Now, there’s not a damned thing wrong with self-promotion. That’s how indie artists, authors, and other self-employed folks get the word out. You have to be able to talk good talk in order to get people’s attention. But leading with this meme? Guilting people for not leaping from sudden unemployment straight into the thick of the ever-shifting gig economy? That ain’t gonna fly, Brocephus.

You Have Good Reasons to Slack

Excuse me while I dust off my counseling psych degree a sec, here. *ahem* We are in a very sensitive, turbulent time right now. We’re in the middle of a pandemic, the likes of which hasn’t been seen in a century in the Western world. We are in a hugely traumatizing situation here. Not just for the financial losses, but the fact that COVID-19 has killed thousands of people and left many more with permanent lung damage. We still haven’t gotten a handle yet on exactly how contagious this thing is, how long you’re contagious for, or whether you’re immune once you’ve had it, assuming you survive. We don’t have adequate testing, emergency rooms estimate that for every positive test there are 10-20 people out there infected and untested, and everyone with a cough is suddenly Schroedinger’s COVID case. Governments worldwide are slow to react in spite of the rising death toll. People have had friends and family die horribly from this thing in a short period of time. Even people who didn’t already have issues with anxiety, depression and other mental illnesses are feeling stressed, strained and scared–and, yes, traumatized. This image is guilt-tripping people who are actively being traumatized.

So we’re already starting with a populace that is dealing with this collective trauma, as well as whatever personal trauma each individual is experiencing. Not always easy to seize the day when you’re going through that. And I can think of a few other reasons that might further complicate this whole “Just get a side gig!” thing:

–They’re a parent who suddenly has all their kids at home, all the time, demanding time and attention and food, AND they still have to work eight hours a day from home, or maybe even more if their S.O. is unemployed/sick/etc. By the way, if someone trots out Isaac Newton or William Shakespeare or some other historical guy who managed to do epic things during a pandemic, remember that they usually had wives or servants to do all the laundry and cooking and cleaning and (if applicable) childcare for them.

–They’re disabled or chronically ill, and don’t have the ability/energy/etc. to just go and make something happen, just like that. Imagine if you just randomly got the fatigue from a really bad flu, and you never knew whether it was going to last a day or a month. And if you tried exerting yourself when you were feeling better, chances are you’d slip back into fatigue-land. That’s what a lot of my chronically ill/etc. friends have to deal with, to say nothing of issues with accessibility of resources for starting a side gig.

–They don’t have any money for the supplies needed to start a side hustle, or the supplies have been hoarded by hobbyists preparing for a Pandemic Staycation.

–They don’t have the skills for something that just requires what they already have (like, for example, writing on a laptop you already happen to own). Often these skills are things that can’t be perfected in a few weeks at home, but may take years to develop before they’re really marketable–like, for example, the skill to make a decent living on side hustles.

–They have anxiety, depression or other mental health conditions that make it hard to function even in the best of times, but even moreso in this…well…mess. Even people who were mentally healthy before are going to be developing diagnosable anxiety and depression disorders before all’s said and done. And speaking from personal experience, those of us who look successful on the outside can still be internally hamstrung by these conditions at times.

–Plus there’s the fact that we’re not supposed to, you know, leave our homes, which narrows down the field of potential side gigs by a lot.

Even doing something less financially-wrought like learning a new skill or subject takes time, energy, and sometimes money, any or all of which may be scarce for the reasons above and more.

Comparison is the Thief of Joy

I am saying all of this as someone who is arguably an expert on the side gig. I have spent the past eight and a half years 100% self-employed (and a lot longer doing it part-time) as an author and artist, able to cover all my bills and expenses, and for a time I was the primary breadwinner of a multi-person household. I have like ten different things I was doing for a living before this all hit, a pretty diverse set of streams of income, even if most of them just up and evaporated in the past few weeks. And while I’m definitely a hell of a lot leaner now than I was a month ago, I still have my head above water for the moment. So I think I know side gigs.

I’m one of the lucky ones. I’m overall healthy. I have a dog who is a lot less demanding of my time than kids would be. I have my own space where I can focus more or less without interruption. More importantly, I have the skills, the knowhow, the drive and the personality to go out and seek new opportunities. And I’m used to fluctuations in income, though admittedly this one’s unprecedented. Don’t gauge yourself by where I am now. I’ve spent twenty-two years building up my art business, my first book came out in 2006, and I’ve had a series of really good opportunities come my way that I had the privilege to be able to make the most of. I am not your measuring stick, so don’t say “Well, if she can do it why can’t I? I must suck!”

If you’re feeling crappy because you aren’t hopping to it and carpeing the diem and getting everything done, here’s what I have to say to you: Look, you just had your world turned upside-down. Job loss, scarce commodities, sudden lack of outside childcare, restricted movement and inability to be around much of your support system, and did I mention a pandemic is happening, too? Any single one of those things would be difficult for just about anyone to deal with, never mind all at once. And I don’t even know what all else has already been going on in your life–unstable or unsafe living situation, other health issues, breakups and other losses, interpersonal conflicts. You know, normal life stuff.

You’re Not Lazy, or Screwing Up, or (Gods Forbid) Undisciplined

It is totally okay if all you’re doing right now is surviving. It’s okay if you feel like you’re drowning, overwhelmed by all that’s happening both on a global level and more personally. It’s okay if all you can manage right now is to get out of bed and stumble through each day a moment at a time, struggling with a tidal wave of emotions. It’s okay if you’re just trying to keep your kids busy, dealing with a crowded home every single day, or trying to keep COVID-19 at bay. It’s okay if, instead of firing up DuoLingo or opening an Etsy shop, you spend your evenings vegging to Netflix or reading a book or playing hours and hours of Animal Crossing.

Not every moment in your life has to be about being productive even in the best of circumstances, and that goes exponentially so right now. Be patient with yourself, and be kind. You may be one of those folks who literally has to spend all their time scrabbling to try to cover the bills or get some leeway from bill collectors, and you have to dedicate your waking time hunting for resources just to try to get through this week. Believe me, I feel for you, I have a lot of friends in that situation right now, and I hope all of you can find some relief and assistance.

May I suggest something? If you have the energy for something more than the bare essentials of getting by, put that energy toward self-care, whatever you can manage under the circumstances. You can use it to recuperate, to rebuild your emotional and physical resilience. That way if things get rough again in the future, you have more internal reserves to build on. If your usual methods don’t work or aren’t accessible due to lockdown, ask others what they’re doing to keep themselves grounded in this trying time.

Just because you have more time doesn’t mean you don’t have to throw yourself right into something productive! Don’t feel pressured to just go-go-go the moment you have a little freedom to move. If you do decide you want to try a side gig, or a new skill, or learn all about some specialized topic of interest, go for it! If you have the energy and attention and opportunity to pursue something new, it can be a great coping skill during this traumatic time. Just don’t pressure yourself; keep it fun.

One last thing: I want you to save the image I have at the top of this post. And then if you see someone post that meme, saying “Come on, you lazy bums, get up and make that side gig happen! Learn new stuff! Do all the things! No excuses!” you pull out this version, and you look at the edits, you remember that it’s okay to be where you are, and you get back to doing things at your own pace no matter what someone else says. (I find visualizing stapling a printout of the edited version to the offender’s forehead to also be therapeutic, but that may just be me.)

Hang in there, okay? It’s going to be a rough time, but you’re not alone, and what you’re feeling right now is shared by so many people. So just let yourself be where you are in this moment, and we’ll see what hope tomorrow brings. And remember that whatever you’re capable of in this moment: it’s enough.

Did you enjoy this post? Please consider supporting my work on Patreon, buying my books here on my website, buying my art and books on Etsy, or tipping me at Ko-fi!

#COVID-19 #mental health #executive dysfunction #anxiety #depression #mine

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thewolfmanslayer · 3 years ago

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Honestly the amount of people who say artists and writers should do stuff for free, or try to rip them off on comissions still royally piss me off.

I think the worst part of it is the entitlement, I dont want to make this too much about generations but a lot of commissioners are millenial/Gen z's who grew up on the "steal and pirate everything" mentality, take everything that you can because no one else is going to hand it to you. which I can get behind, when you are screwing over MULTI BILLION DOLLAR COMPANIES. NOT THE STRUGGLING ARTISTS AND WRITERS who are trying to keep food on the table as desperately as you probably are!

It's simple, you wouldn't walk into a restaurant, order food and tell the server "sorry I don't have any money, but I've got like a few thousand followers on social media, I can get your name out there, get the restaurant some exposure" NO! They don't need "exposure" they need you to pay the damn bill!

On top of that, most of these artists and writers ALREADY HAVE FOLLOWINGS. They already have thousands of people following them, waiting for the chance to get a commission, who are willing to pay for said commission, they don't need "exposure" when they're already out there! He'll even the artists and writers with a few hundred don't need it, they'll get more followers as time goes by, their skill alone will see to it.

And what is with people trying to get free art and writing? It's not going to work! You can't harass someone until they cave, trust me, you'll be long since blocked before you even have the opportunity. I don't do comissions, online anyways, but my own friends and family, people who actually know me STILL PAY ME whenever they ask for me to do art for them because they KNOW it takes TIME AND EFFORT.

How many times do we need to have this discussion???? Like when is it going to finally click that people who need to pay their bills just as much as you do AREN'T going to do this shit for free!?

Here's the thing about art and writing, that you've heard a billion times but still aren't getting; IT. TAKES. TIME. AND. EFFORT. TO. GET. DONE. the art isn't going to magically appear and the writing isn't going to suddenly write itself, if either were so convenient YOU WOULDNT BE ASKING AN ARTIST OR WRITER IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Look at that, you see that? The first picture I did back in 2012-13, the picture beside it? I did that TWO YEARS AGO. I didn't suddenly know exactly what to do, or had anything close to a god given talent for drawing (I'm not that talented). The first picture WAS THE ABSOLUTE BEST I COULD DO AT THE TIME THAT I MADE IT. In the time between these two drawings I admittedly took a break from art, but then I got back into it four years ago. EVEN STILL that was four YEARS of starting over from the basics, relearning everything, learning new things, wanting to actually improve my art.

Which, guess what, DID NOT HAPPEN OVER NIGHT. It was HOURS UPON HOURS of my limited free time as an adult drawing over and over and over and over again, every single goddamn day to get to the point that I was able to make that redraw look as good as it does in comparison. He'll, my art now puts them both to shame! Because I spent the time improving my quality!!

Now look at these artists doing comissions, they've probably put EVEN MORE of their time to get that good! They've put in LITERAL YEARS of sweat, blood, tears, frustrations and dedicated hardwork. Some did the same as me, self teaching and lots of practice, others probably had to go to school, which definitely wasn't cheap. But all of us put in that time and effort TO REACH THESE POINTS. Of being better artists, developing our styles, getting faster at drawing.

And maybe you think that this is super easy, right? That I or every other artist can just fire some art off and boom its good and done in like an hour?

FUCK. NO.

Even now it takes me several hours a day OVER MANY DAYS to make something exceptionally good! It doesn't matter how good an artist is, it still. Takes. Time.

Maybe the issue is that you don't understand how much actually goes into art, let me break it down for you, the steps that most people follow to finish ONE drawing.

-Rough draft: general character outline, get a feel for what I want to draw.

-Rough sketch: I start doing a bit of pencil to start filling in details like mouth, nose, eyes, hair, clothes. Ect.

-Penciling: I go over the rough sketch and clean everything up, maybe do some editing, this is when you can start making out all the details.

-Ink: I trace over the finished pencil with a pen tool and actually have the line art, everything looks clean, presentable, it actually looks like a character now. I'll spend time editing this and possibly redoing the inking many times over to get to a point where I like it.

-Flat color: I decide on which colors to use for skin tone, clothes accessories. Ect.

-Shading/highlights: I figure out where my light source is and how strong it is, I then apply the correct amount of lighting and shadows to the color to give it depth, I also have determine the texture of skin, clothes and accessories to make everything look real and natural.

-Blending: I smooth out the shading and highlights so that it looks more natural and isn't too hard (noticeable difference between color) so that it looks as natural as possible.

-Finish: I go over last minute details, finish any editing or corrections that need to be done. Once it's good I call it a day.

Each process is longer in length then the previous, with the exception of the final editing (as long as everything looks good) and even the rough draft can take some time. Over all this is SEVERAL HOURS of work for a SINGLE DRAWING.

So is it sinking in yet? How much is put into doing even a single character drawing? God forbid if its done with background. This isn't a "scratch a pen around and be done with it in ten minutes" kinda deal, no, this is SEVERAL HOURS OF SOMEONES LIFE BEING PUT INTO THIS

And if you still have the AUDACITY to try and wrangle free art from an artist then there's no helping you, you're just a selfish piece of shit, no question and I want nothing to do with you.

Someone might say "But I got free art/writing from.-" look I don't give a shit if someone did something for you THAT ONE TIME, these other artists and writers? Totally seperate and different people. You're one freebie experience does not, and should not apply to other artists and writers.

"But what if I really want this commission but don't have the money right now?" Well, that's tough shit. Save up and properly commission them when you can, it's not their problem.

"But what if I'm in a really bad financial situation and really want it?" That sucks, and I'm sorry, but again, not their problem. Chances are this is their only source of income and they need to make money so that they don't end up in a similar situation.

"They have a gift! They should share it!" What kind of cheap ass- LOOK, just because someone is talented or really good at something does not automatically obligate them to do anything for total strangers in anyway shape or form. These are living, breathing people, the same as you. They need to eat, they need to pay rent/mortgages, they need to pay vet bills, send their kids to college, do their taxes and everything else that YOU YOURSELF need to do. Asking anyone to spend their time doing something for free, when that something is how THEY ARE SURVIVING is beyond asinine. Not only that, this obviously isn't a hobby to them, it is very clearly THEIR JOB. Would you want to do a job where you didn't get paid at all? Doing a shit ton of work for absolutely nothing? No? Didn't think so.

"It shouldn't be about the money!" Well unfortunately, as with almost every other job, it is. We live in a world where we desperately need to make money in order to survive. That's the painful fact of the matter. If money never had to be an issue ever again then this would be a very different story. But it's not, plain and simple as can be.

Look, these people are just like you, artists and writers who are just trying to get by in a shitty ass world, using the one thing they have that let's them have an income. Leave them be, don't try and trick them, guilt them, or cuss them out when you don't get your way. Either properly comission or leave them the hell alone, plain and simple.

#artists #writers #art #writing #rant #comissions #people

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totallypathet · 5 years ago

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Episode Six

Okay first of all, massive spoiler warning!!

Snaaaaaaatch gaaaaaaame!!! I love snatch game. It's such a good opportunity to shine, and be hilarious, and show us what you can do! It's also the challenge queens have the most time to prepare for, so it's always interesting to see who actually comes prepared...

Also, the runway this week was incredible! I think it's been the best week so far for runway looks, so many of them were sooooo stunning! Who knew that a Frozen theme would bring out the best of the season so far??

Okay, let's get into the breakdown.

1. Aiden Zhane

Oh my god. I am so so so so so so so so glad to see Aiden finally fucking LEEEEEEAVE. It's been a journey guys, but we got here. I am so excited not to have to see that little black wig anymore. Honestly, there was nothing good about her performance this week. I was actually really excited to see someone do Patricia Quinn, it's cool seeing people do references that I hadn't even thought of and salute older parts of LGBTQ history. The reality, though, made me want to jump off a building. It was sooo cringy and sad. There was nothing Patricia about it, she didn't even bother doing the accent. How are you gonna stand in the work room and say "oh I know her, I had lunch with her" and deliver a performance like that?? And also, every question she was just like "I don't even know where I am am!" And it's like... dementia isn't funny. It was just hard to watch.

Her runway was, I think, the best she's ever looked. The wig was still shaky af, but her makeup was really pretty, and her padding was really good. The dress was lovely, but it wasn't very...creative. It was just a blue dress, and the yeti concept was only done from the neck up. It kind of felt like she went to the competition with just the dress, then she saw what everyone else was putting on and was like "oh damn I've got to make a concept out of this somehow!"

Also that lipsync though... it was like watching Vivienne Pinay and Honey Mahogany again, let's just say that.

Tl;dr: she deserved to go, and I'm glad to see her go.

2. Brita

Brita, Brita, Brita. Still bitter af. All she does is talk shit on other people and like...maybe if you stayed in your lane and focused on what you were doing, you wouldn't be in the bottom all the time? Just a thought. Shes another one where it felt like she just didn't do enough research on her character. It's so disappointing, and kinda inexcusable - you know what's coming, you have so much time to prepare and you still don't bother? I don't care for that kind of attitude. Also if she mentions that she won Entertainer of the Year one more time I'm gonna lose my mind. I don't care that you won it! Show me why you won it! Show me why you deserve to win this! I just haven't seen anything from Brita that I've enjoyed. I'm disappointed and underwhelmed.

Her look on the runway was also a bit underwhelming, it was a pretty gown, but it was almost and exact copy of Eureka's glitter look. That comparison has been made already, but it's true. We've seen it, why would you bring a copy of a gown from just 2 seasons ago? Underwhelming.

Her lipsync was also not that good, but she was against Aiden, so of course she won. Excited to see her go next week though!

3. Crystal Methyd

Whew, Crystal was a rollercoaster this week! Poppy was a really tough choice. I didn't know who she was at all, but I looked up a few videos of her after the episode and now I get what Crystal was going for. She actually did a fairly good job of what she was going for, but it just wasn't the right character for snatch game. We all know RuPaul has very simple humour, anything big, slapstick, edgy, all that stuff. The humour Crystal was going for could have been really funny (if I knew more about Poppy, that's on me), but RuPaul was never going to get it. And also, she was trying to do a robotic character like 2 seats down from Gigi, who was also doing a robotic character and killing it, so that's an extra level of difficulty.

Having said all of that. Crystal. Was the best. On. The. Runway. That outfit was incredible! And her makeup was so stunning! And the hair was perfect with it! She absolutely killed that runway, and I was gagged by it. Crystal has turned out so many looks, and I Love It. That runway 100% saved her from the bottom 2 and I could not be happier about it. So proud of her.

One other thing though, I am so bored of the El DeBarge thing. Move on, Ru. Crystal is far far more than a mullet.

4. Gigi Goode

Gigi is an absolute powerhouse this season. Her choice to play a robot was bold, but I live a queen with confidence. And she was confident, she knew what she was doing, she did her research, and she killed the snatch game. I'm so proud of her. One thing I will say, I swear they called the robot Maria, but I thought that human looking AI robot was called Sophia? Maybe there was a copyright issue. Anyway, her performance was so hilarious! The struggling with the cards, the calling everyone a bitch, the mispronouniation of vagina, I loved it all. She came with references, she came prepared, and I stan.

Her look was really great, but I almost feel like it was a little repetitive? I don't know, I just feel like I wasn't surprised by it. It was cute, it was perfectly fitted, there were really gorgeous little details about it, but it was the shape and style I expected from her. Maybe it's because she's set the bar so high leading up to this point, I was just a bit "meh" with her look this week.

She still fully deserved to win, and she did a fantastic job this week.

4. Heidi N Closet

Heidi also did a good job this week. Her Leslie Jones was a safe performance, she made me laugh, she had the look down, I was not at all mad at it. Was it perfect? No. Was it good? Absolutely. I enjoyed it. I'm glad she didn't do Phaedra Parkes. I really don't enjoy when Ru tries to change their characters in the walk through. They've brought information, and references, and preparation (most of them); and you want them to throw all that away and do someone else just because you think so? No. I will grant that sometimes Ru points them in the right direction when they're choosing between 2 characters - but I don't like when he just pulls a character out of nowhere for them.

Heidi's look was also really great; she was giving me 2018 Met Gala Rihanna but in Winter. Her makeup was stunning, she looked so pretty. The only thing I didn't love was the shoes. I kind of wish she'd just gone for a white or silver pump. The fur was too much for me.

Good week for Heidi, definitely a safe performance, I'm glad for her.

5. Jacki Cox

Jackie 👏 came 👏 prepared 👏 I have never watched Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, I was only vaguely aware of Lisa Rinna nefore the snatch game, but I still found her performance so funny! She looked just like her, she sold me who Lisa Rinna was really quickly, so I was able to laugh at the rest of her jokes. I didn't specifically know Lisa Rinna, but we all know a woman like that, so I could still get the humour. I might not have caught all the references, but it was still funny. That's how you play snatch game. You need to be able to make people laugh even if they don't know who you're actually portraying. I absolutely loved Jackie this week.

Her runway look was also stunning! I loved the snowflake, I loved her makeup, and I adored her hair. Jackie is so good at serving something so different every week but still sticking to her brand and her signature. I love Jackie.

6. Jaida Essence Hall

Jaida's Cardi B was really good! She looked just like her, sounded just like her, had her humour down... absolutely solid performance from Jaida.

Her look this week was also soooo beautiful! She's such am absolutely stunning queen, her makeup skills are incredible, she knows her body, she knows what suits her, and she rocks it every week.

The only thing for me with Jaida is I feel almost a little...disconnected from her. I just don't feel like I've seen the vulnerability from her like we've seen from Heidi, or Jackie. And that doesn't mean I want her to tell some horrific story from childhood, I just mean that when we see her she's always on, yknow? And I get that it's a tv show, and a competition show at that; I just wish we could see her humanity a little bit. Having said that, I totally get that queens of colour (and particularly black queens) get so much hatred from the drag race fandom, and I completely understand that it would be difficult to open up and be vulnerable after seeing what other black queens have been through during and after the show.

Nevertheless, she is utterly incredible and so deserving of a top spot. She's a real contender for winner of season 12.

7. Jan

I love Jan. I love her so much. Shes so excited to be there, she's working so hard, and I appreciate it so much. Her Bernadette Peters was not great. Or maybe it was, I have no idea who she is. And she didn't sell me, like Jackie did. It was kind of a shame. I feel like Jan has the talent to have done almost anyone, and she just picked someone that I feel like took too much explaining. Still a solid performance - for me she was on a level with Heidi. Solid performance, solid runway, good week.

I did like Jan's runway look more than Heidi's though, I loved the concept. Jan is another one who has pulled out something very different every week, but still stays distinctly Jan. I love her makeup as well! Jan doesn't get enough recognition for her makeup skills, she's really talented, she paints beautiful faces, and is not afraid to get artistic and high fashion.

8. Widow Von Du

I love Widow so much, but everything she did this week was just slightly off. I thought her Ike & Tina performance was actually a bit of a shame, I think she focused too much on having a gimmick that her performance suffered. The thing about switching characters in snatch game is that both characters have to be really good (and equally good), otherwise it just feels a little messy. Her performances just weren't quite there this week. I wish she'd just picked one and spent a little more time perfecting it.

Her runway also wasn't quite there. I loved the concept, she did something so different from everyone else, and I love when queens pull off a standout look. Her makeup and the ice on her face was also incredible, she honestly has the most beautiful face. I just wish that dress had hit the floor. I wish the skirt had been a little more full (maybe more petticoats?), and it had hit the floor. Widow does have this awful habit of wearing ugly shoes - and if the gowns hit the floor it just wouldn't matter. It was a shame.

Still a solid week and a decent performance, don't get me wrong; I just keep wishing for her to really pull it out and succeed, and she's just slightly missing the mark for me at the moment.

Okay, now I'm gonna say something kind of controversial about this season; I wish Jan, Jackie, and Widow weren't on it. I wish they were on next season. I'm saying that because I think they're all so incredible, and I think they all could potentially win a season - if they weren't on with Gigi Goode and Sh***y P**. Gigi has been so unstoppable, and I love her, but she's kind of overpowering, and I really want to see someone other than her (or Sh***y P**) win a challenge. I mean, it's no secret that Sh***y P** was pre selected to be top 4, and this season has been geared towards her, so of course she's been winning challenges. It just has almost become like a 2 person competition, and it's a shame! Because there's so many other queens who deserve wins, and deserve recognition, and they're not getting it because the top 2 is like always those 2. I'm not mad at Gigi, bc she's slaying the competition and she's working really hard; I just feel like there's been seasons where Jackie, Jan, or Widow would have absolutely killed it and won, but this season they're just not getting the recognition they deserve. Just my opinion!

#drag race #drag race spoilers #rpdr12 #rpdr spoilers #aiden zhane #brita #crystal methyd #gigi goode #jackie cox #jaida essence hall #Jan #jan sport #widow von du

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hermionegranger56 · 4 years ago

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ok lads its time for my breakdown of folklore, something absolutely no one is asking for but here we are!! this album. thIs ALBUMMMM. dear GOD. the intersection of my two favorite things, taylor swift and indie folk???? i feel like i’m dreaming. when she announced the surprise drop i literally burst into tears and evidently for good reason lol.

anywho here’s the thing. Red has been my all time favorite album for 8 years now. it holds such an important place in my life and i never thought anything she did could come close (though Lover almost did). but this. THIS IS BETTER THAN RED

the lyrical genius is unmatched here. taylor isn’t just writing songs here, this is POETRY. every song is nuanced, intricate, devastatingly beautiful, with words that’ll haunt me for a long time. and the fact that it’s stories, literal folklore, no longer just about her own life is incredibly creative and is executed so well for someone who has interwoven her life into her entire body of music thus far. folklore blends facts with fiction so seamlessly and is a true exhibition of taylor’s power as a songwriter.

and the vibessss!! from haunting heartbreak songs, to ethereal lost-in-the-woods vibes, to a comforting return to her old self, this album has everything. taylor is without a doubt one of the most versatile artists of our generation, having success and skill in multiple genres and folklore only solidifies this fact.

ALL RIGHT KIDS LETS JUMP IN

the 1: hell yeah explicit tswift give it to me lol you ARE on some new shit!! ok when i first listened to this i hadn’t read her statement about the other perspectives and i was about to RIOT about her and joe breaking up (like they could ever lol). this is such a catchy beat, such a casual?? look at such a painful feeling? a really good start to this album. the part where she goes another day waking up aLONE killlllllls me wow

fave lines: “in my defense i have none/for never leaving well enough alone”

cardigan: (don’t get me started on the mv it’s gorgeous) YES THE TEENAGE LOVE TRIANGLE suchhh a good concept!! the melody of this song is unreal, the chorus makes me want to scream it’s so beautiful, the i-i-i is SOMETHING ELSE. it’s crazy how just the melody makes betty’s pain so palpable, but so enchanting at the same time. it’s bittersweet and cinematic and i’m in love. PETER LOSING WENDY GOD. easily top 5 song here

fave lines: “when you are young they assume you know nothing”, “cause i knew you/ heartbeat on the high line/ once in 20 lifetimes i” “you drew stars around my scars/but now i’m bleeding”

the last great american dynasty: watch hill!!! her watch hill house!! i live near there!! oh i think this song is so clever and i love how it ties into mad woman as well as harkens back to starlight. i LOVE the way she ties her self in, “and then it was bought by me” like ughhh her mind? and its catchy AF

fave lines: “i had a marvelous time ruining everything”

exile: YOU KNOW HOW TO DO AN INDIE ALBUM??? BRING BON IVER INTO THIS SHIT!! wowww this song is haunting and is definitely the “i’m you but stronger” version of The Last Time. the overlap of both of them singing and their parallel lines are flawless. i could play this on repeat for hours and contemplate my whole existence

fave lines: “you never gave a warning sign/i gave so many signs”

my tears ricochet: ok somehow a track 5 with tears in the title is not the saddest song here but DAMN is it good. I love the visual of someone watching over their funeral and reacting. the music is stunningggg here. ALSO i am pretty convinced this is about the whole scott/scooter drama, like the lyrics fit so well? and she said it was the first song she wrote so the timeline kinda fits?? geniusss

fave lines: “I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace”, “and if i’m dead to you/why are you at the wake?”

mirrorball: ohhhh this one is so pretty!! it just makes me want to dance around the kitchen with the person i love??? its comforting, ethereal, happyyy ugh i love it. I also think it could be about her relationship with her fans? like her music shows us different sides of ourselves idk? or just absorbing into a relationship?

fave lines: “on my tallest tiptoes/shining just for you”

seven: i’m gonna call this now: this is going to be the most underrated song on this album. it is STUNNING. POETIC. HEARTBREAKING. the music is so hauntingly nostalgic. and the lyrics, holy absolute shit. they’re a delicate testament to childhood, memory, and innocent love. it’s gut wrenching and i love it so so much

fave lines: “i’ve been meaning to tell you/i think your house is haunted/your dad is always mad/and that must be why”, “and just like folk song/our love will be passed on”, “before i learned civility/ i used to scream ferociously” ALL OF IT

august: and now we get the girl james cheated with’s perspective, which i think is great. its sunny, wistful and sad underneath all that beautiful production. when she slides from the chorus to the “back when we we’re changing for the better” and hits that “mineeee to lose” GOD, it just fills your chest. i feel like even if you never have, this makes anyone feel like they know exactly what a summer fling feels like. one of my faves

fave lines: “august slipped away/like a bottle of wine”, “cancel my plans just in case you call/ and say meet me behind the mall”

this is me trying: the slow pacing of this melody serves to show these EXQUISITE lyrics here. this is so intimate and personal and i feel like everyone can relate to this feeling of just trying to hold on and put on a brave face?

fave lines: “they told me all of my cages were mental/ so i got wasted like all my potential”

illicit affairs: ok all you need to know about this one is a) I’m obsessed b) this is the closest she has come to creating a bridge that makes me feel like the All Too Well bridge has, like scream sobbing in the car type vibe??? its unreal. and this song makes me feel that shitty feeling of: “this was supposed to be casual but oops its very much not” hmmm maybe that’s where the scream sobbing comes from hahah

fave lines: “don’t call me kid/don’t call me baby/look at this godforsaken mess that you made me/you showed me colors you know i can’t see with anyone else”

invisible string: this. THIS is probably her most stunning love song. like. i thought it was Lover. i was wrong. this one is confidently from Taylor’s perspective, about Joe and dear lord i want a love like theirs. and shit does this song put the folk in folklore, the music is so simple and gorgeous and harkens back to her country roots without losing this new sound she has. and the first few notes remind me of Mystery of Love by Sufjan Stevens so instantly im sold. this and betty are tied for my number 1, it’s just too beautiful

fave lines: “time curious time/give me no compasses/give me no signs” “isn’t it just so pretty to think/all along there was some invisible string/tying you to me”, “cold was steel of the axe that i had to grind/for the boys who broke my heart/now i buy their babies presents”, “hell was the journey/but it brought me heaven”

mad woman: FUCK YOU FOREVERRRRRR!!! yes taylor said fuckkkk ugh i LOVE this vibe, the revenge of the mad woman that the town cast out is so eerie and powerful, i’m obsessed. it ties back into the maddest woman of TLGAD and it feels like a spiritual sequel to The Man, the same feminist thread weaving through it. the lyrics are razor sharp and biting, i love it

fave lines: “and you poke that bear/till the claws come out/ and you find something/ to wrap your noose around”, “it’s obvious wanting me dead has really brought you two together”

epiphany: so uhhh THIS is the saddest song on folklore. fight me. the seamless comparison between wartime and the pandemic and waiting for some epiphany that could make sense of all the horrors surrounding the both. idk man, as someone who’s been a covid nurse since March, i just….this one HURTS. similar to Soon You’ll Get Better tbh

fave lines: “hold your hand through plastic now/doc i think she’s crashing out/and somethings you just can’t speak about”

betty: OH I LOVE IT WITH MY WHOLE HEART! this is such a TRIUMPHANT return to old taylor, it is so joyful but sad at the same time?? the harmonica?? the last part of the love triangle?? it sounds like Taylor Swift and Fearless all grown up and it makes me ache for back then, but love where we are right now. tbh the first time i heard this i sobbed through the whole thing just out of pure nostalgia. she’s back but at the same time she never left. this feels like a love song to original fans and it. is. incredible. my favoriteeee goddd

fave lines: THE WHOLE CHORUS BABYYYYY

peace: it’s gorgeous, especially the guitarrr ugh. this feels like delicate’s quiet older sister. i think it’s definitely about joe and how taylor, despite loving him, still has these insecurities and fears about what a relationship with someone in her position could be like? like there will be struggles, but he’s her family and she “would die for you in secret”. stunning

fave lines: “i’m a fire and i’ll keep your brittle heart warm”, “the devils in the detail/but you’ve got a friend in me”, “give you my wild/give you a child”

hoax: i’m surprised she ended it on a sad one (but we still have the lakes!!) but this song is hauntingly beautiful WOW. every line of this absolutely floors me. i think this one will also be largely underrated, but it is pure poetry and deserves so so much hype

fave lines: “stood on the cliffside/screaming give me a reason/your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in”, “it still hurts underneath my scars/from when they pulled me apart/but what you did was just as dark” “my kingdom come undone/ my broken drum/ you have beaten my heart”

ANYWHO TAYLOR HAS PRODUCED HER BEST WORK TO DATE AND IM READY FOR SAD GIRL AUTUMN

#taylor swift #folklore #tswift #folklore the album #taylor swift folklore #ts8 folklore #folklore era #betty #august #cardigan #exile

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tessatechaitea · 4 years ago

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Cerebus #3

Time for some good chafing gags!

I love Cerebus. Once I began buying the monthly issues, I stuck with it until Issue #300, no matter how bored I had become with Cerebus's explication of Genesis. I stuck with it because it had entertained me so much and because I loved the idea of a comic book series with a character who grows and changes and eventually dies as an old, decrepit, huge delusional mess. Or was he delusional? Yeah, I think he was. By the end, I think we're supposed to realize Rick was the protagonist? Whoops! I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm still in the issues where I don't have to think too hard about anything and can just sit back and laugh at jokes about chain mail bikinis and a woman who will only fuck somebody who overpowers her physically! What I meant to say before I interrupted myself like usual, I kept with the series because I loved so much of it. Not all of it, of course. Who could love all of it?! Dave Sim was writing things that kept himself interested and wasn't too worried about, say, keeping the audience that loved Church & State while writing Melmoth, or expecting people who loved Guys to be enthusiastic about Coming Home. I appreciated this comic book so much that it's the only reason that I kept purchasing monthly comic books as I entered my thirties. I had gotten to the point where my brain was having too much trouble remembering all the different comic book story lines with a full month long gaps between each twenty-four page bit of story. So at some point just past the year 2000, I decided I'd stop reading monthly comics altogether after March 2004, the final issue of Cerebus. After that, I kept up with Fables and Walking Dead via collected editions. But I was done reading monthlies (until The New 52 somehow dragged me back in to do that blog project!). So yeah. I was (and still am!) a huge Cerebus fan. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to be critical of the series and the writer. Dave Sim makes a lot of mistakes and I'm going to have a lot of fun pointing them out! You might not think they're mistakes but I ask that you hold your comments until the end (you know, my review of Issue #300!) because why would I want to argue on the Internet with other huge comic book nerds? We're the worst! One person I'll never criticize because I don't think they ever do anything wrong: Gerhard! That fucking work horse nails it throughout the entire series! Nothing much to say about Deni's "A Note from the Publisher" since all she says is how she has nothing to say. I was hoping she'd admit to rubbing one out over one of Dave's finished Red Sophia pages but my horrible male nerd projections about how women act once more didn't come to fruition. How is it everything I learned about women from female comic book characters turned out to be so wrong?! I refuse to believe it's because most of them were written by men. Men are so rational and logical! They wouldn't have steered me wrong!

I should probably do a little research on Frank Thorne.

Frank Thorne was best known for his work on Marvel's Red Sonja. Yes, I lifted that directly from Wikipedia. But I typed it myself! Another thing I learned from Wikipedia (I'd do more research than just Wikipedia but I don't want to wind up on YouTube where I'll not only learn about Frank Thorne's artistic history but also that the American Democratic party runs a pedophile sex traffic ring and also something about cannibals? I mean, it sounds like something I'd like to believe!) is that Thorne wrote a book called How to Draw Sexy Women. So, you know, he's probably one of my heroes? Frank Thorne is currently 90 years old and he might have the most adorable picture of anybody on Wikipedia.

I want to be best friends with him right now. Six year old me would have been over the moon in love with him (I had a Grandfather Fixation when I was really young that probably had nothing to do with my father leaving when I was two).

This issue not only introduces Red Sophia but also the wizard Henrot. That's an anagram of "Thorne"! Red Sophia is an anagram for "Hi! Do Rapes." I don't agree with that at all. I'm just the anagram messenger. I'm also not suggesting that Dave Sim knew what he was doing anagrammatically! I mean with the Red Sophia anagram. He definitely meant the Henrot/Thorne one! Cerebus has returned to civilization but now needs some quick cash because one thing Cerebus always needs is quick cash. He's only wealthy a few times and those times don't usually last long. He goes to see Henrot (who allegedly gets his power from two of the five Spheres of the Gods! So now we kind of know more about those things even if it is just a rumor) to question him about any paying mercenary gigs.

You might think the missing word in Henrot's dialogue was a mistake by Dave Sim but later we'll probably learn in, I don't know, Issue #143 that Henrot's first language is Borelean to account for this seeming error.

Cerebus doesn't usually take assassination or torture jobs because he finds them distasteful but he needs the money. Sure, he'll take any job that has him killing people in battle or invading private wizard's towers to murder the owner and steal the owner's stuff. But assassination and torture? So wrong! Once Cerebus takes the job, he learns that he was to take Henrot's daughter, Red Sophia, along with him. The target besmirched her honor so she needs to watch him die slowly and painfully. Is this where the MeToo hashtag goes?

Red Sophia drawing tutorial: Draw some big tits, some big lips, and a big mass of hair. Connect them with some kind of woman shaped lines. Ta-da!

Red Sophia chatters incessantly and dances around while Cerebus carries all of the gear. It's funny because female characters get to represent all women instead of being a unique character! Ha ha! Women really do talk a lot, right? And they're always all, "Carry my purse for me!" And guys are all like, "Stifle your emotions like a normal person! Carry your own purse! Stop dancing around whimsically and try to act tough and cool like regular people do! Play some sports already! Take care of me like you were my replacement mother!" In the "A Note from the Publisher," Deni wrote that since the first issue (remember the first issue? So many issues ago!), Dave had wanted to write a story where Cerebus interacts with a female. She doesn't say Dave wanted to write a female character. He just wanted Cerebus to interact with a female. So I guess that's what this is! Cerebus interacts with a female stereotype who is also a sex fantasy. Not because she's hot but because she constantly tries to fuck Cerebus throughout their adventure! What sword and sorcery reading nerd didn't dream of that three or four times a day in a dark room? I'm being harsh on Sim because it's more fun than lavishing praise on him. You can tell Sim realizes the inherent problems with Red Sonja because that's the bulk of his parody. The problem isn't Dave's take on the character; the real problem is simply the character Red Sonja! In 1978, Sim was already commenting on the ridiculous armor artists draw on women (there will be chafing jokes!)! And in this story, Dave Sim expresses how ridiculous it was to create a female character who was raped and then given great fighting skills by some Goddess with the catch that she can never fuck a man unless he beats her in fair combat. Just looking at it from a guy's point of view, I'd probably be all, "You know what? I don't want those powers. Could you maybe just strike down the asshole who raped me and let me not have to attempt to beat up every woman I'm attracted to?" Is that enough hot takes on Red Sophia? Cause I want to get to the part of this review where I can admit that I fucking love her so much. Later Cerebus meets Elrod who is really just Foghorn Leghorn. I'm pretty sure Red Sophia was less Red Sonja than Pepé Le Pew. I know, I know! There are probably some sensitive reasons why I'm not supposed to like Pepé too! But he was my mother's favorite Looney Tunes character! Anyway, I can't blame Dave Sim for making his first female character about 75% stereotypes of women. He's still a young writer! You've got to give him about another 183 issues to really clarify his stance on the interactions between genders! I'm sure it'll be more layered, nuanced, and rational.

Cerebus might be an Earth Pig but he's not a chauvinist pig. He doesn't take sexual advantage of Red Sophia here; he just makes her carry all the gear. It's a good joke that I'm ruining by explaining it instead of scanning in the punchline!

Just for comparison, let's take a look at a modern interpretation of Red Sonja by Ed Benes. I bet just that artist's name alone gives male comic book nerds a chubby. Not a full on hard on though. Those are probably reserved for hearing the name "Frank Cho."

What do they teach in art school? Women can turn 180 degrees at the waist? Not that I'm complaining! Dark room, here I come!

Oh shit. I forgot I was reading this comic book! Okay, um, so Red Sophia attacks Cerebus for besmirching her honor. Or Cerebus attacks Red Sophia for knocking him into a bush with her ass. Maybe it's a little bit of both. Anyway, Cerebus defeats her so Red Sophia begins throwing her ample bosom at Cerebus every chance she gets. Cerebus is not interested for some reason. Maybe it's because he stuck a sword in his vagina when he was younger? That happened, right? Or was that a flashback about him having his period? Now that I'm thinking about it...what the fuck is this comic book? I think maybe I hallucinated some of it! Cerebus isn't a fucking slut, man! He doesn't just fuck any hot woman whom he defeats in battle! He needs to fall in love and/or get completely wrecked on Peach Schnapps. So he has no interest in Red Sophia. I suppose a woman trying to kill you is a bit of a turn off. And then later, when she gets you into a fight with Thugg the Unseemly, it's less of an aphrodisiac than you might think.

I think Borelean might be Red Sophia's first language as well. I mean, she is Henrot's daughter.

The Letterer part of Dave Sim has already fucked up twice this issue. I bet he was too busy having his sword and sorcery fantasies in a dark room to pay close attention to the script. This is probably why Dave Sim eventually gave up masturbation. Later, Red Sophia feeds Cerebus granola and it totally cracks Dave Sim up. He said so in the Swords of Cerebus essay! Didn't you read it? I, for one, prefer the joke on the following page about Cerebus being a cannibal. Or an aardvark who eats human meat, anyway. I think that's close enough to cannibalism. We learn later that aardvarks can have offspring with humans so I feel like the aardvarks in this book are less sentient funny talking animals and more severely deformed human beings.

Red Sophia's tent. If this we were well into Mothers & Daughters when this tent made an appearance, I'd think Dave purposefully drew it this way. Since we're only on Issue #3, I think he was just feeling horny when he drew it.

If at any time during this review I've referred to Red Sophia as Red Sonja, just remember that English is my second language. I'm Borelean. I apologize to Dave Sim for earlier suggesting that Red Sophia was simply a bunch of female stereotypes mashed together into a character. As I said, I love her. I figured I probably started loving her after she makes several more appearances but I'm pretty sure this is the page where I knew needed more Red Sophia in my life.

How can you not be completely charmed by the "I'm pretty good at hand-holding" line?

This is a good reminder that I shouldn't be judging early Dave Sim by Issue #186 Dave Sim and beyond. He should always get the benefit of the doubt and, even after #186, he should retain it. I need to be reading the material both with fresh eyes as if reading it for the first time and with the knowledge of the whole in an attempt to understand it better. This scene is just so fucking charming that I hate that it might be ruined for many people based on their "knowledge" of Dave Sim. I put knowledge in quotes because, really, how many people who think of Dave as a misogynist have actually read Cerebus or Tangent? How many have just heard they're supposed to despise him because he's been called a misogynist? I mean, sure, you just have to read a bunch of his Biblical explications to understand you're dealing with something other than neurotypical! But it'd be nice if more people came to their Dave Sim conclusions themselves instead of just jumping on the bandwagon. I'm not saying people who think he's a misogynist aren't automatically wrong! Dave thinks they are but come on. He eventually gives out a lot of slack with which to make quite a few nooses to hang himself with. Um, okay, back to not judging Cerebus based on future Dave's rants about the Marxist/feminist/homosexual axis! Cerebus and Sophia finally reach the target where Cerebus discovers that the target, Tanes Feras, loves Sophia. And just like that, he figures out how to get rid of Sophia while also torturing Feras (possibly to death? Time will tell!). He commands Sophia to marry Feras because she must do whatever he asks. Sure, she thought it would involved his super long tongue and her metal-chafed butthole. But that's the great thing about love! It doesn't care what you want. Henrot seems to accept this conclusion for now. He'll definitely be back later. And so will Red Sophia. I can't wait!

The map of Cerebus's world by Deni's brother, Clovis. He ran out of ideas when he got to "Ocean Sea."

I'll have to remember to keep referring back to this map throughout the series. Although I'll probably only need it for the first twenty-five issues. And then maybe after Mothers & Daughters. Nothing noteworthy in Aardvark Comment this month. Just some Canadians saying things like, "Glad to see a Canadian comic book from Canada about Canada!" Which is confusing because I didn't realize how much of Cerebus was representative of Canada. I've really got to rethink my Canadian stereotypes. Now I'll be sure to picture Canadians as 50% Cerebus and 50% Joey Jeremiah. Cerebus #3 Rating: B+. Sim's art remains a bit more on the amateurish side than the professional side. But that's to be expected. Already you can see improvements in the consistency of Cerebus's look and I think maybe his snout is already getting shorter and girthier. This was the first issue where he drew a woman so I can't fault him for drawing a blow-up doll in a chain mail bikini. Why would I? I'd never fault anybody for drawing a blow-up doll in a chain mail bikini! I also just thought up a new category to search on eBay. This issue begins to show where Sim really excels: his characters. The first two issues basically highlight Cerebus dealing with a few generic characters. But Red Sophia (and Henrot to a lesser extent) captures the spotlight this issue. Ignoring some of the shallow aspects of her character creation (if you even believe those exists. Don't take my super-professional critical opinion on it!), she's really rather charming and a competent foil for the Earth Pig. Just knowing that she's the tip of the iceberg in the gallery of recurring characters excites me more than those fantasies I keep having in my dark room.

#Cerebus #Dave Sim

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darkobsidianquill · 5 years ago

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Harry Potter and the descent into Darkness..

Chapter 24

They were called 'katas', Harry had learned, but it looked like some sort of elaborate choreographed dance. He supposed it was. It was a muggle martial arts thing, or so he had been told. A repetitive set of motions that one practiced over and over again to work out the kinks in their technique. Harry had been stunned to learn that Voldemort had studied under a muggle martial arts master for about a year when he was in his mid twenties.

Apparently the then-future-Dark Lord, had been traveling to the far east in search of a specific magical artifact and had witnessed some martial artists during his search. He had been impressed enough to extend his stay in Japan even when he had determined that the artifact in question wasn't there, and the country was still in a rather pitiful condition because of the war that had only ended four years prior.

Voldemort was, by no means, a master of martial arts, however he prided the skill as it improved his reflexes, balance, and footwork. But hand-to-hand combat was an absolute last resort, and one he highly doubted he would ever have to resort to. Even in the unlikely scenario of being separated from his wand, he was capable of enough wandless magic, as well as his incredible repertoire of parselmagic that also required no wand, that he would likely never be in a situation where he could not fall back on some sort of magical technique.

Still, Harry could tell that the little bit of muggle martial arts that the Dark Lord had learned, was impressive. His movements were mesmerizing. The fact that he was barefoot and in a pair of loose pants, tied at the ankles, and no shirt, wasn't exactly helping matters. Harry couldn't fathom why the hell seeing the other man's bare feet was so mesmerizing, but for some reason it was. Can a person have handsome feet? Harry had never given it any thought before, but he decided that if anyone did, Voldemort did. His eyes weren't stuck on the feet for long though. The man's chest was far more mesmerizing. Harry was so utterly distracted by the scene he was witnessing, that he had utterly abandoned his own exercises that morning.

"Gods, you're beautiful..." The words slipped out of Harry's mouth before he even realized his mouth was open. He'd thought them so many times during the last two weeks; why his brain decided to misfire and speak the words aloud this time, he had no idea, but now that they were out, he couldn't take them back.

He felt his face and the back of his neck instantly grow hot with embarrassment, while the bottom of his stomach dropped out in horror as he feared how his words might get taken.

Voldemort stopped in his choreographed movements, turned, and quirked an amused eyebrow back at the younger wizard.

"I-I'm sorry," Harry said quickly, ducking his head.

Voldemort chuckled. "You compliment me and then apologize? Harry, don't be ridiculous."

"I just... I mean... I'm sorry if it... weirds you out or something."

"What on earth are you going on about, Harry? Why in Merlin's name would it 'weird me out' to receive a compliment from you?"

"Er, I mean, with me being bent and all," Harry mumbled, looking down and fiddling with the drawstring of his jogging pants.

Voldemort narrowed his eyes and looked at Harry for a moment before speaking. "Bent... that's a euphemism they're using these days for being gay, correct?"

Harry blinked. He forgot sometimes that it had been more than a decade since Voldemort had been able to be around other humans, and who knew how distanced he was from that sort of 'slang' even before his first body was destroyed. Still, was 'bent' a recent slang term? Or maybe it just wasn't used much by wizards? He really didn't know.

"Er, yeah, it is."

"Well, I suppose it's better than the things that were tossed around when I was school age," Voldemort mused quietly. "The idiots I attended Hogwarts with preferred to just call me a faggot. But of course, none of them survived much past graduation. In fact, dear Myrtle didn't even make it that far," he mused with a wicked grin.

Harry's jaw dropped and he stared in dumbfounded shock at the Dark Lord opposite him. Had he just...?

"You're gay?" the words fell out of Harry's mouth before he could engage the filter between his brain and his mouth, but once the words were out, he could do nothing but curse himself for his idiocy. What the hell was wrong with his brain-to-mouth filter today?

Voldemort gave him a long piercing look through narrowed eyes before the corners of his mouth turned up into an amused smirk.

"Yes, Harry. I am gay. Obviously, this is not something that is common knowledge, but I did get publicly 'outed' in my fifth year when I was sloppy enough to get caught snogging someone in a broom cupboard, by an extraordinarily nosy Gryffindor. At first he thought he could blackmail me with the information – I'm sure you can imagine that if being 'outed' in the present day was unpleasant for you, being outed fifty years ago was considerably worse. I refused to give into his demands, but at the time I was not in a position to forcefully silence him either. He quickly spread word around the school."

"Wow. I bet his death was painful," Harry deadpanned.

Voldemort's smirk grew wide and wicked. "Oh, it was."

Harry chuckled lightly but quickly found himself imagining the 16-year old Tom Riddle snogging some boy in a dark secluded broom cupboard and instantly found himself growing aroused by the thought. His arousal only shot through the roof as the anonymous, faceless 'other boy' suddenly turned into himself. The sixteen-year old Tom Riddle in his mind slowly morphed into his older visage that Harry had grown so close to in the last two months and Harry almost groaned aloud as his whole body suddenly ached with desire. He quickly tried to stomp the image out of his head. He'd already embarrassed himself beyond reason; the last thing he needed was to be sporting an erection in the Dark Lord's training gym.

Harry glanced up to see Voldemort grinning wickedly down at him with that lopsided smirk, that he sometimes felt the Dark Lord reserved just for him. That smirk that had been sending flutters through his gut for weeks now. Seeing it now, combined with the rest of the Dark Lord's amazing presence, totally did him in. He felt himself getting lost in the other man's glittering blood-red eyes. Falling into them.

Beautiful didn't even begin to describe the Dark Lord. He was a fucking god. His presence, combined with his power, combined with his confidence, combined with his amazing body...

Gods, Harry wanted to touch him! Not just feel the other man's hand in his hair, but to actually touch him. Feel the older wizard's skin beneath the pads of his fingertips... The other man's exposed chest, glistening with a very light sprinkling of sweat, the faintest dusting of hair at the top center, and that teasing line from the base of his naval down to, and disappearing into, his black pants, was taunting Harry and he felt his lids growing heavy with desire as the coil twisted in the pit of his stomach.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he turned his head away and ran his hand through his hair roughly.

So what if the other man was gay? It wasn't like that made any difference at all in the end. Voldemort was the most powerful dark wizard in the world. At best, Harry figured the other man might see him as a protégé or an apprentice of some sort. He doubted that Voldemort considered him to be anything more than the scrawny kid who happened to be holding a piece of his soul, and who he was now training to be a better wizard. Harry obviously needed to be able to properly guard the precious piece of Voldemort's soul, and to do that, he needed to be able to defend himself. It only made sense for Voldemort to be training Harry. He had reasoned that this was the most logical reason that the Dark Lord would be willing to spend so much time with him and dedicate so much of his efforts to him. Even beyond all of that, Harry was more than aware of the significant age gap between the two, and doubted that the other man could ever see past it...

He huffed in frustration as he pulled roughly at his own hair and found his eyes drawn back to the Dark Lord's gaze. What on earth had he been thinking, letting his imagination run away with himself like that, anyway? It's not like he could pursue anything with the Dark Lord. What would he do if Voldemort was offended by his interest? What if he told Harry to leave? Refused to allow him stay for the summer? Refused to continue their lessons? Harry didn't think he could face that. His time with the man had become too precious. The idea of not being able to stand by his side, every day, made Harry ache. The man had become so important to him, so quickly. It was more than just familiarity, friendship, or the admiration of a mentor. The draw he felt to the Dark Lord felt magical. Literally. It felt like there was some powerful tug deep inside him, calling him to Voldemort. But just being in the other man's company didn't feel like it was enough anymore. Just like the company of his companion had seemed pale in comparison, after having spent some time in the company of the actual Dark Lord. Once he was exposed to one, the previous incarnation wasn't enough anymore. And now that he had become accustomed to being able to spend time with Voldemort, he knew he could never give it up. But deep inside him, a piece of him desperately wanted something more. Not just time in the other's company; but intimacy.

Harry blinked slowly growing aware of an added pressure in his mind. A gentle, featherlight caress that he realized had been steadily growing over the passing silent seconds.

"That's quite an imagination, you've got there, Harry," Voldemort's voice came out in soft whisper and Harry suddenly startled as he realized that the man had come to stand directly in front of him and his face was only inches from Harry's. "So many thoughts buzzing around in there."

Oh Merlin... he'd seen. He knew... How much? How long was he inside my head? Did he see the fantasy?

Harry's mouth fell open to say something, but he realized he had no idea what to say or do. Any words he might have found escaped him utterly when one of Voldemort's long-fingered hands came up and brushed gently along Harry's cheek. A tiny gasp escaped his lips and he felt his eyes falling closed as the gentle caress of the Dark Lord's magic seeped into him from the tiny bit of contact.

"You feel it too, don't you, dear boy?" Voldemort's whispery voice said a moment later. "I think it's caused by the soul and the blood bonds interacting. I'm not really sure, to be perfectly honest. Such magics are always unpredictable."

Harry's eyes opened and he looked up at the other man with confusion. "What...?"

"The pull that exists between us. I'd swear it's growing in strength. Perhaps I've indulged in it too much, but I just can't help it. I've never been much one for denying myself something when I want it."

Realization began to dawn in Harry's eyes and a tiny, but powerful, hope sparked to life inside him.

"Do you want me? The way that I want you?" Harry asked suddenly with a voice that was much more confident and assured than he probably felt. Part of him couldn't believe he was being so blunt, but if his Gryffindor courage wasn't good for much, it was at least worth something here.

Voldemort gave him a long look, but Harry couldn't quite distinguish what the older wizard's blank face meant. Finally Voldemort's hand dropped to his side, abandoning Harry's cheek and leaving him with the sudden feeling of loss.

"It doesn't matter, Harry. You're fourteen years old. You're practically still a child."

"I'm almost fifteen!" Harry suddenly said in a rather desperate tone.

Voldemort snorted and rolled his eyes. "You do realize how juvenile that response was, don't you?"

"Well, who gives a damn how old I am? I don't care how old you are!"

"Do you even realize how old I am?" Voldemort asked with a humorless face and a single raised brow.

"I said I don't care!"

"I'm sixty-nine, Harry. Sixty-nine years old."

"Fine, but you don't look it! You don't look a day over thirty. I don't look fourteen either! Since I finished taking the accellerant potion, I could easily pass for seventeen! Neither one of us has normal bodies. Besides, what the hell does age matter to an immortal Dark Lord? And if you're theory is right, then I'm immortal too! So I don't see any reason why age should factor into this!"

Voldemort sighed and pinched the bride of his nose for a moment before letting his hand fall to his side. "You don't understand, Harry. It is more than just your physical age. Age has a lot to do with mentality too. You simply haven't lived enough days to –"

"But you're always telling me that I act far more mature than a fourteen year old! You're always saying that you forget how old I am because I don't act like it!"

Voldemort growled. "It doesn't matter, Harry!"

"Fine, whatever! But you never answered my first question. Do you want me? Do you want more than just... just... whatever this is that we've been doing? Because I know I do!"

"There is magic at work here, Harry!" Voldemort yelled suddenly. "I don't even understand the nature of what's going on!"

"Yeah, well I don't bloody care!"

"I will not let some ancient magic control my actions and choices!" Voldemort bellowed.

"So it's nothing more than the magic to you? This thing between us – there's nothing more to it? Nothing pulling you to me aside from the soul bond and the blood bond? Nothing?" Harry asked.

Voldemort sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose again.

"Because I know there's more for me," Harry continued in a desperate voice. "I feel the magical connection to you, but I'm also drawn to your mind; your intelligence and genius! To your personality; how you just take control of things. You exude power and confidence and I love it. I love being around you when you just take charge. I love our talks and the time we spend together just doing nothing. Just being in your company makes me feel so much calmer and I can think better, and I know that it's more than just some magical connection! I just know it! I look forward to coming here every day. I look forward to telling you about what's been going on in my life at Hogwarts and every day I look forward to hearing what you've read in the papers and what new spell or ward your working on. Are you saying that you don't feel anything extra about the time we spend together? Nothing extra about me? Are you saying that it's just the magic and nothing more? Because if that's it, say so and I'll never bring it up again. But if it's not... if it's not –"

And suddenly his words were cut off as Voldemort's lips were pressed against his own in a fiery display of completely unexpected passion. Harry was stunned for a moment but quickly began to melt into the other man's embrace. One hand was instantly buried into his hair, but it wasn't just threaded gently into his raven locks, it was fisted in them and pulling, hard. The rough tug shocked Harry, mostly by how much he liked it. How much part of him wanted the other man to pull harder.

Voldemort's other hand wrapped around his waist and pulled Harry flush against the older wizard. Harry moaned out against Voldemort's lips as he felt the entirety of the other man's torso pressed against his own, and his arms came up and wrapped around Voldemort's neck on autopilot.

The kiss continued and deepened. Harry almost gasped when he felt the older man's tongue slip out and brush against his lips, demanding access. Harry's mind was a whirl with confusion, lust, need, desire for more, but also the fear that he had absolutely no idea what he was doing. This was his first ever kiss, and he wanted to do it right. He didn't want to disappoint Voldemort. He parted his lips and felt the man's tongue come in and probe about. It was strange and yet indescribably erotic. He felt his whole body reacting to their interactions, and he could feel Voldemort's body reacting too.

Instinctively, his hips gyrated and he ground himself against the other man experimentally. Voldemort growled into his mouth and deepened the kiss while tightening his grip on Harry's hair. Harry cried out in pleasure and shock and thrust himself against the other man again.

It was just so good. He could feel their magic swirling around and through them like a hurricane. Things in the room were shaking and falling about from the torrents of accidental magic flying off them.

Voldemort broke away from Harry's lips and the younger wizard almost whimpered in disappointment. He didn't want it to end yet. He wanted more. More. The whimper was, however, cut off when Voldemort instead latched onto Harry's neck and began to trail his lips and teeth along his long pale column and then began to bite and nibble along his jaw.

"Oh gods," Harry moaned and gasped as Voldemort gave another rough tug of his hair, pulling his head back and exposing more of his neck.

"Are you sure, Harry?" Voldemort's voice came out in a husky pant. "Sure that you want this?"

"I want it! I want it! Oh, please... please!"

"I won't let you change your mind, Harry. If you really agree to this, you're mine. No one else can have you. No one else can touch you."

"Yours. Only yours!" Harry panted and eagerly nodded his head as much as he could with the older wizard's hand still fisted in his hair.

Voldemort tugged Harry's hair, exposing the other side of his neck and trailed his tongue up it until he came to Harry's ear and pulled it between his teeth. By this point, Harry was quite literally writhing against the other man and panting heavily. He'd never felt anything so amazing in all his life. He could feel their magic twining together in some strange new way he'd never experienced before and it only seemed to heighten the feeling from the onslaught of physical stimuli. He could feel the most powerful coiling pressure he'd ever experienced building up in his gut, and had absolutely no hope of stopping his body from thrusting against the other man. Not that he needed to, since Voldemort actually began to grind right back against him in the most delicious and erotic dance of Harry's life. It was incredible and indescribable and he couldn't believe it was all happening so fast.

"Oh gods, oh gods, oh gods," Harry chanted with his quick shallow pants as the two bodies writhed against each other in rhythm.

"My name," Voldemort panted into Harry's ear.

"What?"

"Say my name, Harry."

"Wh... T-Tom?" Harry asked, in surprise.

"Yessss," Voldemort hissed.

"Tom...Tom. Yes..." Harry said, experimentally testing out the name on his panted breaths.

There was another insistent tug in his hair and the pain only seemed to exaggerate the extreme pleasure he was experiencing everywhere else. It felt commanding and controlling and for some reason he found it turned him on all that much more. At some point during all of this, Harry's hand had begun a desperate exploration of the other man's exposed chest, and it was like the palms of his hands and the pads of his fingers were on fire with that melded magical energy. Every touch set him alight and he couldn't get enough.

"Only you, Harry," Tom said, gripping a tight hold on Harry's rear and pressing them together harder in rhythm. "Only you can ever say it."

Harry moaned out as he was filled with a rush of some foreign emotion he couldn't quite place.

"Oh Tom... ahh... oh.. oh, I – I... I'm going to... oh fuck..."

"Yessss, Harry. Cum for me, Harry. Only for me," Tom growled out and Harry felt the other man's magic tighten around him as if latching onto him and pulling on something deep inside it. It was insane and intense and everything happened at once.

"Yes, Tom! Only... oh gods... only you. Only ever you. Oh Tom!"

Harry called out as his world exploded and he began to convulse erratically against the other man. It was so much more intense than anything he had ever self-induced. The best wank in the world couldn't hold a candle to what was happening in that moment. He'd never even imagined he could feel this good. His clouded, lust-filled mind only just barely recognized the fact that the other man was jerking and convulsing and moaning right back in the same way, and the thought that he had done that to the Dark Lord filled him with a surge of pride and even more powerful euphoria.

Tom grunted as he reached his own completion and his grip tightened in Harry's hair to the point of almost pulling a good chunk out, but a second later the hold loosened and slipped into a gentle threading through Harry's black locks.

The two sighed and panted against each other as they came down from their entirely unexpected activities. Harry buried his head in Tom's neck and smiled.

Tom.

It felt like it was some incredibly special honor and it was only his. Only Harry could call Voldemort by his real name. It would be weird to start thinking of the man as Tom after thinking of him as Voldemort for so long, but he somehow didn't think he'd have much trouble making the shift. Helooked like a Tom. This man who Harry had become so utterly attached to. Who Harry had grown to cherish and adore beyond reason. This man didn't feel like Voldemort to him. He felt like Tom. It felt right to call him that. But most of all, it felt glorious that the man had granted him permission to do so.

It truly seemed that this gesture had to have some deeper meaning to it. It had to have some greater significance that the Dark Lord was willing to allow Harry to use his given name. Harry didn't know what that meaning was, but he was sure it was important.

"Are you still sure this is what you want?" Voldemort... no Tom's voice came out quietly in an extremely rare display of insecurity. Harry felt his grip on the other man tighten protectively.

"I'm sure," Harry said in a muffled voice into the older wizard's shoulder with strong conviction. "I won't change my mind. And I... I hope you won't either," he finished with a far more weaker, and equally insecure voice.

Tom was silent for a moment while his hand threaded gently through Harry's hair and gently massaged the scalp that he had so recently abused.

"No, Harry, I won't change my mind. You're mine now."

Harry grinned widely and gave Tom another squeeze, relishing in the fact that he was holding the other man. That he was completely wrapped up in his arms and that it felt even more amazing than he had imagined. "Yours."

Tom seemed to be enjoying the embrace as well, but finally he pulled away and sighed quietly. His face was strangely soft and his eyes were filled with some deeper emotion that Harry couldn't quite place, but it was suddenly replaced with his normal mask.

"Come, Harry. We're both a mess and I highly doubt that either of us will be getting anymore work done in here this morning."

He turned and walked over to the hooks on the wall near the door where he had a loose outer robe hanging. He slipped it on and Harry sighed longingly at the loss of the older wizard's beautifully exposed torso.

Tom looked over his shoulder and smirked leeringly at Harry, causing him to grin and duck his head in mild embarrassment. Tom led him up the stairs to the second floor and to the door of the bathroom he usually used there. He instructed Harry to get 'cleaned up', while motioning to the shower, and to then join him in the study when he was done. The next moment Tom had closed the door and was gone.

Harry stood there in the marble and porcelain bathroom feeling as if he were still in a state of mild shock. What had just happened was slowly seeping in and he couldn't wipe the smile off his face.

His hand came up and he lightly brushed his fingertips over his still-swollen lips and actually giggled lightly. He rolled his eyes at his idiotic reactions and quickly stripped down and stepped into the shower.

It wasn't until after he got out that he realized he didn't have a change of clothes. Nor, in fact, did he have the soiled clothes he had come in with. They had vanished from the floor where he had left them. Best he could figure was that Mixey had popped in and grabbed them.

Over-eager house elves, Harry grumbled to himself as he wrapped one of the fluffy deep navy towels around his waist, and slung another over his shoulders. He didn't even have his wands since they were both in his bag back in the study. Otherwise he would have transfigured one of the towels into a bathrobe.

He stepped cautiously out of the bathroom and looked both ways down the long hallway. He felt exceedingly exposed wandering through the manor in nothing but a pair of towels and could only imagine how utterly embarrassed he would be to walk into the study in such a state. Part of him hoped that he would beat Tom back to the study and be able to change into his school robes before the other got there, but a bigger part of him doubted he'd be that lucky.

He hurried down the hall and slowly pushed the door to the study open and peered inside. Tom was there, just as he'd known he would be. Harry grumbled against his always-shitty luck and slipped inside.

Tom turned his head and his brows slowly climbed into his damp black hairline at the sight of Harry wrapped in nothing but a pair of fluffy blue towels. The corner of his mouth curled up into an amused smirk.

"Mixey made off with my clothes," Harry muttered. His face grew hot and pink as he saw Tom's eyes trailing over his exposed body hungrily. Finally Tom chuckled and turned his attention back to the newspaper in his hand.

Harry hurried over and picked up his bag, pulling out his cypress wand and his change of clothes. He hesitated, looking unsure for a brief moment before he began to head back out towards the door.

"You can change in here, Harry. It's not like I haven't already seen it," Tom said, and Harry could hear the amusement in his voice. Harry's face went red and he froze, debating his options.

"Yeah, but we weren't exactly... together or anything back then," Harry mumbled, and Tom only snickered more.

"Do you honestly think I didn't take a good look while I had the chance?" Tom asked humorously and Harry felt his blush increase dramatically, while he also felt a surge of delight at the thought that Tom had been checking him out, even that early on. It had been quite a while since the ritual in the big bathtub to remove Harry's trace, after all.

Finally he huffed, annoyed by the intensity of his embarrassment and just dropped the towels. He was facing the wall, with his backside exposed to the Dark Lord. He could feel the other man's eyes on him, but tried not to fumble too much to show his nervousness as he quickly pulled on his trousers and a light undershirt. He would wait to pull on his outer school robes until he left.

He ran his hand through his hair in a rough, nervous gesture and heard Tom chuckling from behind him. He turned around and scowled at the other man, but he couldn't hold onto any malice and quickly found himself grinning again. He was just too happy. He often joked about what piss-poor luck he had, but at the moment, he honestly felt like the luckiest man alive. Of course, he knew that few would agree with that sentiment, but that was just because they didn't really know Tom. No one else knew him the way Harry did. Or at least, that's the way he felt. He knew he still had so much to learn about the other man, but he realized that there was nothing he wanted more than to spend every waking hour finding out. He wanted to know this man's every nuance. His every experience, and his every desire. And he wanted to fulfill those desires. He wanted to be the one to make Tom smile. He wanted to be the one – the only one – to make Tom make that wonderful keening noise from the back of his throat as they writhed against each other.

He looked over at the older wizard, perched regally in his leather and wood office chair, with that devilish smirk on his lips, and had the most ridiculous urge to go sit in the other man's lap but Tom stood up, saving Harry from his own impulses.

"Come here, Harry," Tom said, motioning with his hand. Harry took only two long strides to get to the older wizard and came to an awkward stop a foot from him, wanting desperately to get closer, but unsure if it was okay. He felt so confused and unsure. He was excited and elated by the direction things were heading in, but he was also terrified that he'd do something stupid to screw it up. He knew he needed to try and work on his confidence or he'd just start to annoy Tom, but he was still too overwhelmed and confused to get himself sorted out yet.

Tom saved him the confusion by closing the distance between the two and lacing the fingers of one hand behind Harry's neck and into the messy hair there.

"Was that your first kiss, Harry?" Tom asked with a deep, smooth voice. Harry hadn't expected that question and floundered for a moment.

He ducked his head and shrugged before he shook himself, trying to force his way past the nerves. "Yea. It was. And my first... all the rest of it, too." Harry ducked his head and grinned, widely.

Tom made a pleased humming sound in his throat and Harry looked up to see the older wizard looking down at him with those hungry eyes and a wide, thin-lipped, smile.

"Good," he said before pulling Harry's head up and pressing his lips to his again. The movement was fast and unexpected, but Harry reacted much quicker this time, returning the kiss and wrapping his arms around Tom's waist and fisting his hands in the fine material of the man's shirt.

Tom pulled back and Harry was left panting and looking up at the older wizard with heavy lids and lusty eyes. Tom ground against his already straining erection and Harry groaned out.

Tom chuckled. "Ah... the joys of having a young lover. You recover so quickly. I imagine I'm going to enjoy showing you all the different ways in which two men can enjoy each other's company," he whispered in a husky voice before leaning in and pecking Harry on the lips again. Harry moaned out as a powerful jolt of lust shot through him at the implications of the other man's words.

"But now is not the time," Tom said, pulling away and earning another whimper from Harry. Tom grinned and ran his hand over Harry's cheek, looking down at him with eyes filled with that uncharacteristic, unidentified, emotion that seemed so foreign on the older man's face. "It is about time that you returned to the school. You need your breakfast. Come back after lunch. I suspect I'll complete the transformation tomorrow – assuming we don't get distracted," he gave Harry a pointed glare and Harry grinned sheepishly.

Harry almost literally dragged his feet as he made his way to the first floor corridor outside the time-turner room. Tom had escorted him down there and as the two came to a stop in front of the door, Harry was relieved when Tom once again initiated the one thing that Harry wanted more than anything else – another kiss, and another lingering embrace.

Feeling Tom's body against his own was an experience Harry couldn't explain. The strange magic was clearly playing some role in it because Harry could feel swells of magic coursing around and through them the closer they got. But he also knew it was more than just the magic. Every part of him ached for Tom. He wanted to hold on and never let go. The idea of returning to Hogwarts was practically depressing. He just wanted to stay at the manor and never leave Tom's side.

But what use to the man would he be if he did that? Tom didn't just want a house-boy. If Harry kept up his golden-boy persona at the school, he would leave himself in the prefect position to help the Dark Lord's cause when it came time to take the school, or get rid of Dumbledore.

He sighed into Tom's shoulder before taking in a deep, long breath of the other man's scent. It was delicious, and so intense this close up. Spices and musk and traces of whatever shampoo or body wash he had used in his shower.

Finally Harry pulled away, but not before Tom had given him another peck on the lips and smirked at him. Harry slipped into the time-turner room, and moments later he was two hours earlier, at 7:25am. His earlier self would have arrived at the manor a few minutes earlier and was currently in the 2nd floor bathroom changing for his morning workout in the gym.

Harry almost laughed aloud at the thought of what his earlier self was in for in the coming hours. Harry could still hardly believe it all himself.

He went out into the entry hall, activated the port-key and returned to Hogwarts with a secret smile on his lips.

It was Wednesday, so he had a free period in first block, and Charms in second. Ron never bothered to get up for breakfast on Wednesdays – opting instead to take advantage of the free morning period to sleep in.

Hermione also had the period free, then Charms, and then ancient runes later that afternoon after lunch – but she, unlike Ron, got up on time and still attended breakfast, so Harry knew he'd still be seeing her that morning.

He came through the portrait hole into Gryffindor Tower and made his way over to one of the couches in a dreamy haze before collapsing down into the overstuffed seat with a big dopey grin on his face.

"Where have you been?" a voice sounded and Harry sat up and blinked in surprise. Hermione and Ginny were both sitting on the couch opposite him with books and parchment all around then. He hadn't even realized they were there.

"Uh..." Harry floundered. His head was still to busy buzzing with thoughts of gentle caresses, rough grips, tugging hair, and the sensation of having Tom's teeth tongue trail along his jaw.

Ginny suddenly gasped and Harry turned his blank face to her.

"Is that a hickey!" she hissed with curiosity and mirth in her eyes.

Harry could feel his face go red and his hand instantly shot up to his neck. But he suddenly realized he had no idea which side of his neck a hickey might be on, since Tom had assaulted both sides.

Oh shit, what if there's more than –

"Several hickeys!" Ginny continued. "And are those teeth marks?"

"Oh bollocks!" Harry moaned as he quickly stood up, intent on racing out of the common room. It was still pretty unoccupied and his quick look around told him that no one else down there seemed to have overheard their conversation.

"Oh, Harry, sit down! Stop panicking. Hang on just a second," Ginny said, still grinning while she rolled her eyes at him. "One of my roommates knows some really good glamors for covering those sorts of things up. I'll just run up and ask her." And with that Ginny was up, out of her seat, and racing up the stairs.

Harry stared after her, gaping and confused as he slowly sunk back down into his previous seat. His eyes glanced up hesitantly to Hermione, who looked both shocked, and... amused. Harry rolled his eyes.

Hermione began to dig around in her bookbag and after what seemed like deep exploration, she came out with a small compact mirror. Harry was mildly surprised that Hermione even owned such a thing and apparently his expression showed this.

"I started carrying it around since the dance," she said defensively, and not meeting his eyes.

Harry grinned. "How are things going with you and Viktor? You two still meeting up in the library?"

Hermione blushed and ducked her head before looking back up and scowling playfully at him. She thrust the compact at him and as he took it, she whipped out her wand, tapped it, and cast a quick engorgio charm on it. It enlarged to the size of a dinner plate and Harry quickly began to examine his appearance as discreetly as he could manage in the public setting. He was just grateful that few Gryffindors were morning people.

His neck was littered with dark red and purplish marks, and a number of red teeth marks. His jaw also featured a number of red marks. At the sight he wasn't sure which emotion would win out – the urge to be deeply embarrassed, or the sudden rush of arousal that the reminder of the events that created the marks, caused.

He realized suddenly he was grinning and ducked his head, sheepishly before closing the enlarged compact, and canceling the enlargement charm.

He cleared his throat and handed the compact back. "Er... thanks."

Hermione rose a single questioning eyebrow and sent him a look that clearly said 'you will be explaining this.'

Ginny reappeared on the stairs to the girls dorms just then and quickly made her way over to them. A couple minutes and several fairly simple healing and glamor charms later, and Harry looked normal again.

As he examined his appearance in the mirror again, he was almost sad that he'd had to remove the evidence of his and Tom's activities. Having physical proof just made it that much more real.

"Thanks you two, for helping. I really appreciate it," Harry said as he hunched over in his seat on the edge of the couch.

"Well?" Hermione's voice came out impatiently.

Harry looked up and gave them his most innocent and bewildered look. "Well, what?"

Ginny guffawed and Hermione growled.

"No way, Harry Potter!" Hermione began. "You're not getting out of this without an explanation! What happened? How... who was responsible for – for – that?"

Harry's eyes darted between the two girls with a mild sense of panic in his gut. He knew he couldn't dodge this bullet, but he needed to give them something convincing, while not revealing any indication of anything even remotely close to the truth. A story popped into his head, and he could only hope it would be sufficient.

He twisted around, checking the other occupants of the common room before standing up and moving over to sit on the same couch as the two girls. He pulled out his phoenix feather wand and cast a quick privacy spell around them.

"I may be seeing someone," He said in a low voice, still looking around as if he were extremely paranoid of being overheard.

"Really!" Ginny almost squealed. "Who?"

"I can't tell you. He's... he's not out. To anyone. That includes his family, alright?"

"We would never tell anyone, Harry!" Hermione insisted suddenly, and she looked visibly hurt at the insinuation that he couldn't trust them.

"It's not that I don't trust you two, I just can't risk this. It's not my secret to tell. Besides, I trusted both you and Fleur with my secret and I know that neither of you told anyone, but it still got out. I still have no idea how Skeeter found out, but that doesn't change the fact that she did."

"But Skeeter's been missing for months. It's been all over the Prophet. No one has any idea what's happened to her," Ginny said.

"True, but I'm not willing to risk that whatever method she used to spy on us isn't still available to someone else. Like I said, it's not my secret to tell. If his family opened up the Daily Prophet one morning and found out that their son was being outed to the whole bloody world and that he was being accused of dating the Boy-Who-Lived... it would... it would be bad. I just can't do that to him. You understand, don't you?" Harry said with the most sincere, pleading face he could muster.

"Oh Harry," Hermione said with her most sympathetic face. "Of course. We can help you, you know. We're your friends, we'll do whatever we can to help."

Ginny nodded her head enthusiastically.

"Thanks you guys. It really means a lot to me," Harry said with a small shy smile, while grinning internally. This could work to his advantage.

"So how long has this been going on!" Ginny asked in a hushed but excited voice.

"It's sort of been building up for a bit, but this morning was the first time we really... did anything," Harry admitted, grinning at the memory.

"That must have been a pretty hot and heavy snogging session to leave you looking like that." Ginny said, with a wicked smirk.

Harry blushed but his grin only grew wider.

"It was my first real kiss, too," He admitted, truthfully. Happy that he actually had the opportunity to tell someone about this monumental event, even if it was being sugar-coated in lies.

"Really?" Ginny exclaimed with a big grin. "That's so great, Harry. Was it good?"

Harry barked out a laugh. "Good? It was bloody brilliant. It was... it was amazing. All of it was just so far beyond anything I ever could have hoped for or imagined! I... Merlin I think I..." he cut off, stunned by what he was about to say.

"Think you what?" Hermione prodded.

"I think I love him," Harry finished in a near-whisper. Did he? Did he even know what love was? He took on a determined look and nodded his head to himself. If anything was love, this was.

"I mean... it's early and all. We really only just admitted to each other how we feel, but we've been dancing around it for months now. I really... I really do think I love him."

"Wow..." Ginny said in a hushed whisper.

Hermione just looked stunned. Finally she spoke, "you two have been meeting for months?"

Harry ducked his head and made himself look ashamed, "Yeah... I'm sorry I kept it secret from you, but you already know why. I knew I couldn't do anything that would risk him being exposed. It really has nothing to do with me not trusting you guys, I just didn't want to do anything that could risk it. It's not my secret to risk. Not my secret to tell."

Hermione looked a bit disappointed but nodded her head. "I understand, Harry. I'm hurt, I won't lie about that, but I understand. Just, please, don't feel like you have to hide these things from us. We're your friends. You can rely on us! We'll help you."

Harry grinned and looked up at them through his eyelashes. "Thank you. Both of you. I really do appreciate it. And honestly... it's kind of nice to have someone to talk to about it. Even if I can't give any specifics..

#Harry Potter #Tom Riddle #Dark!Harry #Tomarry #Harry Potter and the descent into Darkness..#Smut

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tumblunni · 5 years ago

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I really hate this "anti purity culture" stuff that decides doing anything horrible is morally correct and anyone who complains is being a prude.

Like I just saw a post blaming "purity culture" for the wave of racist art about the new pokemon character Nessa.

"of course people are gonna fight back and draw racist shit if you call them racist!"

Like sorry that's a terrible argument?? You're not "fighting back" against big bad Tumblr by being horrible to black people, you're fuckin fighting black people who did nothing to deserve it.

Like if you genuinely made a mistake and accidentally whitewashed someone in your art because you weren't skilled enough at lighting/didn't know this was a problem and didn't keep your eyes out for it/some other mistake, then yeah nobody should friggin "cancel" you over it. But nobody is required to find the art unoffensive just because the intent behind it wasn't intentionally racist. People can still say "uh yeah here is the problem" and honestly any rational person would go "oh my god sorry I didn't mean that", apologise and not do it again. Or make corrections or take the art down or whatever. If someone still harasses you after you do that then yeah they're being a creepy "purity police" bastard, but if you friggin didn't apologise and ACTUALLY INTENSIFIED THE RACIST THING TO SPITE SOMEONE FOR POLITELY INFORMING YOU OF YOUR MISTAKE, then it's pretty likely not a goddamn mistake and you're actually just a prick.

Also the context of the original post needs to be taken into context because it absolutely 100% WAS NOT an accidental mistake and people overreacting about it. I have no fucking clue how it's been reinterpreted that way?? The person straight up drew a picture of accurate correct dark skinned Nessa and a comparison photo of her changed into a Caucasian woman next to it, saying "I did two colours cos I wanna know who thinks this is better". It wasn't a mistake of someone getting a skin tone wrong, they drew her normally and literally changed it to white to make some sort of actual racist statement. And nobody fucking "went purity police" on this person, they weren't fuckin harassed or hurt in any way. People just expressed dislike about this and tried to explain why it was wrong, honestly giving this person more benefit of the doubt than I would have. In response the artist changed the post into a picture of her as a literal monkey and laughed.

It goes without saying that there is no good reason to draw a racist stereotype of a black person as a caroactured ugly animal, but seriously they literally drew it in response to people not liking their ART THAT WAS SPECIFICALLY SAYING SHE LOOKS BETTER WHITE

There's no debate here, it's just a racist prick being an immature bitch.

I can't stand when the desperation to prove that "antis" are bad turns into criticizing ANYONE who complains about ANYTHING even when it's 100% genuinely awful. Reminds me of those people back in the era of "videogames cause violence" nonsense who would "fight back" by saying LITERALLY EVERYTHING should be allowed in videogames and nothing should be mature marked. "If you censor literal child rape or don't sell a child rape game on store shelves, then you are just the same as people who want to ban Pokémon"

I guess it just proves that nonsensical extreme exaggeration arguments have always been a gamer fandom thing even before Tumblr...

It just sucks cos I've seen mutuals reblog that "mean horrible antis harassed an innocent artist so they have every right to draw racist monkey shit" post and like.. the only way I can understand it is if they didn't understand the full context or something?

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oc-rehab-centre · 6 years ago

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How To Make An Ackerman OC

(Artist: Xue Lian Yue)

How To Make An Ackerman OC

The Ackerman Family is a very iconic bloodline, exclusive to the Shingeki No Kyojin Universe. A byproduct of titan engineering, the Ackermans possess unimaginable strength once reaching an “awakened” state, through which their strength is triggered. Levi and Mikasa Ackerman are arguably some of the manga’s icons and are well known by many members of other fandoms.

With such an interesting and enigmatic aura to the Ackerman Family - it is understandable that many people in the OC Fandom might take interest in having an Ackerman of their own. While typically - we would advise you here to avoid having fanmade characters be related to canon characters, here - we are going to try and discuss the tropes and cliches of Ackerman OCs. We will tell you what to avoid - and perhaps give you some pointers on how to improve upon your OC. As usual, what you read will be based merely off of personal opinions.

More may be added into to in the future! If you have any suggestions or tropes you would like us to add, send us a message and we’ll add how we best believe could correct that trope/problem!

Trope 1 - Tragic Ackerpast

Sad backstories are not an uncommon thing in Attack on Titan. A majority of the show’s main characters have tragic pasts, and the Ackermans are no different. Of the two childhoods we have seen, Levi’s mother passed away while he was still young and he only learned enough to survive in the Underground District before being left by Kenny.

Despite being from a bloodline that is actively trying to be suppressed - does not mean they need to have a tragic backstory to validate their Ackerman heritage.

Perhaps your OC grew up a little rough around the edges - but their entire nuclear family does not have to be slaughtered - nor do they have to be adopted or fostered by some abusive parents or the perfect, rich parents for their own protection. While this may help your OC better “correlate” with the canon Ackermans in the series, OC critics will be picky of details and certainly pounce on you for this. Just because they are an Ackerman OC does not mean they need an “edgy” backstory.

Note: This fact/tip of OC creation does not just apply to Ackerman OCs! Shingeki No Kyojin, as gruesome as it is - not every character has a tragic past, filled with murder, melancholy and abuse. While tragic pasts can add to certain fanmade characters, it can detract from others. Be sure to do it well, if you decide a tragic past would suit your character, and try to avoid the common tropes/cliches.

Another thing worth mentioning - people seem to dub Kenny as an abusive relative. That man is caring and sweet in his own kind of way. Regardless of the fact that he is a killer, he is very human.

Trope 2 - Forms of Levi Connection

There are various thing that never fail to annoy me about the Ackerman OCs and their relationships to Levi, but I shall only explain and resolve a few of these pet peeves - because they go against the known canon. I’ll list them below - and then you can read about them.

Levi is the Father/Brother/Uncle/etc.

The Thug “Quartet”

Being a Scout

1. Levi is the Father/Brother/Uncle/etc.

A majority of the Ackerman OCs I have seen are in one way or another, connected to Levi. After browsing a few of the Ackerman OCs via Google and looking through their biographies to discover their Ackerman heritage - Levi was almost always the father. And, if not the father - he tended to be either the older brother of the OC.

While there is nothing to confirm the fact that Levi does not have any siblings, I would just like to say - it is unlikely that any of Levi’s fanmade siblings, would be Ackermans. Kuchel, after having Levi - would likely not bear any more children after him - considering the fact that she was presumably sickly even before her son’s birth. (Idea: Remember, Levi has a father, even though he is never seen or named. If Levi’s illegitimate father was a player and enjoyed screwing with lots of prostitutes, you can theoretically have an OC to Levi who isn’t an Ackerman!)

I got a little carried away in that last statement, but I feel personally like it is a realistic idea, far more realistic than Levi having any siblings younger than himself. Levi having older siblings is an idea I am honestly less opposed to, on the condition that they are done well, of course.

What is even better than having your Ackerman OC related to Levi, remember that Levi, Kenny and Kuchel only make up one side, hell, perhaps even just one branch of the Ackerman Family. In comparison to Levi, Mikasa’s side of the Ackerman family is practically estranged from Ackerman OCs. It is always a matter of being related to Levi, rather than Mikasa.

Perhaps you can propose that Mr. Ackerman (Mikasa’s father) has brothers or sisters who have Ackerman children of their own. You are free to be crafty with OCs - as long as they make logical sense!! You have the opportunity to fill in gaps which Hajime Isayama never filled in himself with your own headcanons and plot ideas. Perhaps that man has a stat of 11/10 mystery for a reason you can fill in!

Now to move away from siblings of Levi is concerning a majority of Ackerman OCs - the children of Levi. Many children of Levi tend to be the product of either common pairings (Levihan, Rivetra, Ereri, etc.) or of a canon x oc couple. While these OCs are very prevalent in the fandom, it is quite annoying. Many OC critics argue that children of Levi are instantaneously Mary-Sues/Gary-Stus because their very existence breaks canon and they will advise you to rethink your consideration of making your OC an Ackerman.

Common themes in Levi being the father are typically not believable. Many creators fail to consider the fact that Levi’s age when making their OCs, the product of canon ships or canon x oc pairs. Many people often forget that Levi did not join the Scouts until 844, a year before the Fall of Wall Maria - yet (this is only an example), he has a child who is 15 years old and a member of the 104th Trainees Squadron by 847. I have seen very many Ackerman OCs whose aging does not fit at all into the timeline of the Attack on Titan, so be cautious and take a few minutes to make sure the dates make sense. Just use a calculator or some mental math skills - and make sure it is passable.

2. The Thug Quartet

Moving on - often times, if the OC grew up in the Underground, they are a fourth member of the Thug Trio - composed of Levi, Isabel Magnolia and Farlan Church.

In relation to the question regarding the insertion of an OC in the Thug Trio - I would personally advise OC creators to avoid this. One of the most unoriginal things you can do, which can potentially destroy a fan character is plopping them straight into the series and rewriting the canonical timeline to accommodate your character. This just takes so much originality out of a fan character, and much of the fun out of creating one as well.

A good fan character FITS into a storyline. The canon story should not have to be altered for them to fit into the series. If you are altering canonical events in the story so that it bends to the personal history/timeline of your own character, I’m sorry to tell you this, but stop. For the sake of having a good OC, just stop.

If you want your OC to also live in the Underground District, certainly, they can still be an Ackerman and not be part of Levi’s Thug Trio to, uh, still be a thug - if you’re dead set on your character being a thug.

3. Being A Scout

Let’s be honest. A majority of the OCs in this fandom are soldiers and members of the Scouting Legion. There is nothing wrong with being in the Scouting Legion, Hell - most of my own OCs are in the Scouting Legion. Now allow me to explain why this peeves me.

In connection to the idea of the “Thug Quartet”, a few Ackerman OCs (and also many OCs in general) I have seen have been exploited for their strength and are pretty much Levi, regurgitated in a much smaller, female form. The fact that many Ackerman OCs are asked by Erwin to join the Scouting Legion, rather than joining by their own free will.

*inhale* Just a little bit of salt - people seem to forget Erwin wasn’t the Commander until 845. I’m very nitpicky when it comes to the dates, warning to all the future OCs I will review!

The Scouting Legion is not a first choice for most sane individuals, especially prior to the year 847, when Eren convinced a sizable portion of the main cast to join the Scouts with his teenage, hormonal military propaganda. It was/is a death wish to be part of the Scouting Legion - punishment, depending on how you look at it. Refrain from having your Ackerman Oc (or any OC) be convinced to join the Scouts in the same manner as Levi, Isabel and Farlan - it makes for a very unoriginal concept.

Trope 3: The Ackerman Archetypes

If you ask people to describe Levi and Mikasa Ackerman, the answers you will get will be pretty simple and basic. They are badass, reserved, and powerful. In this section - we’re gonna discuss what OC creators forget to keep in mind when making their Ackerman OC, and these are basically the stereotypes.

Personality

Physical Appearance

Strength

1. Personality

A common misconception about members of the Ackerman Family is that they are all cold and stoic characters who are not overly expressive, often seen frowning subtly in a detached, mysterious manner. GOD. This is an incredibly annoying thing to see in Ackerman OCs - personalities are not genetic and furthermore, the Ackermans are not soulless beings incapable of emotions, just because their badass levels are OVER 9000!!

It’s a common misconception as well that the Ackermans are all stone-faced individuals, but God.. Isayama and WIT Studio have done a lot better in recent chapters/episodes to show both Levi and Mikasa with expressions other than, y’know:

That.

Just because they are an Ackerman does not mean they have to be exactly like Levi or Mikasa - they are free to have their own original personalities.

2. Physical Appearance

Another very common trait of Ackerman OCs is their appearance. In a majority of Ackerman OCs - they will have jet-black hair, light pigmented eyes which if blue, will more often than not be described as “ice blue”. (lol)

This is admittedly a rather justified trait. We see that many of the Ackermans from Levi’s known side of the family possess dark hair and light eye. (with the exception of Grandpa Ackerman, but we can assume he had darker hair in his youth, unless it was a trait from Grandma Ackerman.) It can be argued that dark hair and light eyes are dominant genetic traits, but not every canon Ackerman is dark haired.

Going back to Mr. Ackerman, we know that he has light hair - and therefore proves that not all Ackermans have dark hair. Black hair does not have to be the only colour that exists in Ackermans. Brunette, blonde, fawn - please! I’d love to see some Ackerman OCs who do not have astoundingly light/bright coloured eyes or black hair! It would actually be refreshing to see an Ackerman OC who does not look like a carbon copy of fem! Levi. It will certainly help your character seem more original, despite being an Ackerman!

3. Strength (+ Ackerbond Concept)

Out of all of the archetypes seem in Ackerman OCs - what pisses me off the most is a lack of understanding of the Ackerman’s strength and its origin. There are countless Ackerman OCs who have stats that surpass Levi’s. This not only breaks canon - but seeing Ackerman OCs with stats that say “Battle Skill: 12/10″ and such of that sort, but in their bio, there is never anything stated about a traumatic/changing event that sparked that fire, just makes OC critics wonder if you have really done your homework on how the Ackermans work.

For those who don’t understand what the Hell I’m trying to say here, news flash - the Ackermans are not born as ripe, killing machines. Their strength is often dormant, only awakening in response to an event which causes them to feel threatened, endangered or simply so god damn sh00k that their physiology alters drastically, giving them superhuman strength.

In a flashback episode from Season 1 of Attack on Titan, back when the scenes of the manga were animated accurately and at a reasonable pace - (*cough* Season 3 *cough cough*) we see firsthand how Mikasa’s strength is unlocked.

As a result of trauma and developing what the fandom commonly calls an “Ackerbond” to Eren Jaeger, it is only here when Mikasa is able to find the drive to fight and her ability to do so nearly flawlessly. An “Ackerbond” can be defined as a special and unbreakable bond formed between an Ackerman who they fiercely devote themselves to. Known Ackerbonds that exist are the bonds between: Uri Reiss/Kenny Ackerman, Eren Jaeger/Mikasa Ackerman and Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith.

Some Ackermans, like Mr. Ackerman - never awaken their Acker-strength, and live just like ordinary people, not possessing Ackerbonds or many of the defining traits of the Ackerman bloodline.

Out of the many Ackerman OC bios I have read, a majority completely gloss over the fact that Ackermans are not born as natural warriors - but it is instead something that must be awoken. They often fail to describe HOW their OC came to unlock their power - and even fewer detail the concepts of Ackerbonds between their OC and another character. Hell. Wait. I’ve never even seen an Ackerman OC with an Ackerbond - they just tend to be in love with someone, but that doesn’t count as an Ackerbond.

I would strongly advise, if your OC is an “awoken” Ackerman with stats that exceed 10/10, that you include details about how they achieved their superhuman strength and who they are Ackerbonded to. Additionally, having an Ackerman OC who is not “awoken” and is just your average Joe is also fine, perhaps even better, in some cases!

But in all cases, DO NOT go putting your OC as “Humanities Strongest”, surpassing Levi Ackerman, Mike Zacharius or Mikasa Ackerman! Just... Just don’t, why should be self explanatory.

Assorted Tropes + Pet Peeves

Age and Profession: A majority of the Ackerman OCs appear to be no older than 20 by the year 850. Teenaged OCs are common and cliched in this fandom, and being graduates of the 104th Trainees Squadron is another overly used concept. It would be nice to see some Ackerman OCs who are not soldiers or teenagers/young adults.

Too Many Canon-Breaking Qualities: Some of the most canon-breaking tropes among OCs would be things like canon x OC shipping. Now - I personally have nothing against canon x OC shipping, it does not bother me at all when it is done right. But, having an Ackerman OC is special enough. To keep from getting negative attention and commentaries - try to limit the amount of special qualities you give your OC. This does not apply to only Ackerman OCs, but to OCs in general! Giving your character too many special qualities - like the canon shipping and a spot in Levi’s squadron breaks the canon, and will detract from your character rather than add to it!

Summary of Main Points

Avoid giving your Ackerman OC too many traits that make them overly characteristic and put stress on the canon like: incredibly tragic pasts, canon x oc shipping, being part Asian or from another iconic family, being a member of the 104th Squadron, being part of the Special Ops. Squadron, etc. Try keeping your OC’s life lowkey and avoid making them too special.

Your character does not have to be directly related to Levi, Mikasa or Kenny to be an Ackerman. There is such freedom to expand the family tree - so take advantage of the plotholes!

Make sure your character FITS into the canon - rather than the canon having to change to accommodate their personal storyline. Try to avoid plopping your character straight into the canonverse - you have the freedom to be creative and give them a story of their own!

Try not to use the Ackerman stereotypes - like the certain personality, appearance and strength without delving deeper to explain why they are the way they are!

If they have stats over 10/10 - please, remember to explain why! Ackermans often don’t have their full strength unless their strength is triggered or awoken - often because of a traumatic event or when they discover the person they are Ackerbonded to!! If your OC has high stats and is an Ackerman, find a character for them to be Ackerbonded to!

This is all for now! Thank you for tuning in. I hope you enjoyed reading this and I hope it helped~!

#Attack on Titan #Shingeki No Kyojin #Attack on Titan OC #Shingeki No Kyojin OC #SNK OC #AOT OC #OC Review #OC Help

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applegelstore · 7 years ago

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Hey! Just wanted to drop by and say I really love your art and seeing your content! Along with the ideas you speak of sometimes. It's so nice to see because it looks like you enjoy what you do. It's an inspiration, really. I also wanted to ask, what's your inspiration? And what keeps you motivated? And this next one might be a bit personal, but do you have moments of self doubt? How do you deal with it?

Hi! First of all, thanks a lot for the ask, I don’t get personal questions about my art very often, so it’s very cool to see that some people are actual people and not porn bots, and are actually interested in the things I post!

Now for the actual ask, which I’ll totally have to divide into parts. I’ll also set a cut because it got hella long. Now, let’s go!

I have a very bad habit of word vomiting whenever I post art. It’s not only ever since I’ve started binge drawing Zesty fanart, I’ve pretty much always been like this ever since I started posting art on the internet about… 12 years ago at the very least?It used to be a lot of musing about the art itself (like, “what do you think, should I have tried this or that?” or “I had trouble with this thing” or “I actually like how whatever turned out”), which is probably due to the fact that teenage me had still a lot to learn and wasn’t afraid to admit that and ask for advice. I mostly posted my art online to get some peer advice.Nowadays, I am still aware of my shortcomings, but I don’t talk about the technical aspects of my art that often anymore. Nowadays, I have two reasons for posting art online: 1) I’m trying to make a living out of this shit, so naturally I’m trying to make as many people as possible aware of the fact that I exist. 2) I just wanna talk about the thing ™. Honestly. Never underestimate either of these points. That’s why there’s very often so much text and ranting in the tags. Because. I. want. to. talk. about. the. thing. I have an unholy amount of sticky notes on my desktop with ideas of things I’d either like to do because I think it would be subjectively cool, or because it might be a good addition to my portfolio. (spoilers: the former usually gets done like a decade earlier)I’m very glad that the sparks fly over and it shows that I love the things I love! ♥The result is novel-length descriptions for single sketches and tag vomit, though, lol.

“I also wanted to ask, what’s your inspiration?”

There’s no easy answer to that. First of all, it sounds a bit as if I was actively looking for inspiration. Which I am not. As I said, I rather have too many ideas and end up scrapping an unholy amount because even if I only do doodle shitpost sketches there’s no way I can do it all in a lifetime. I don’t know whether you had been implying that I actively look for inspiration or not, but if you did, let me tell you that I don’t. If you didn’t mean to imply that, no harm done.However, that doesn’t mean I don’t GET any. Because of course I get my inspiration from all kinds of places. I don’t watch a lot of movies, but I love going to the cinema and hearing the sounds and get eye candy (I love epic shots with the camera panning over landscapes and cool action scenes. Also, go watch The Secret of Kells, everyone). I always come out of blockbuster movies feeling like I wanna do something epic, too. I always listen to a whole lot of music, too, and there’s way too many songs that make me want to tell stories, and that plant pictures in the cinema in my head.(there was a time before Tales of Zestiria when I did original art and most of my paintings had some kind of musical inspiration lol. My stories, too).

Then there’s style and subject matter.Style first. I stopped aiming for a specific style pretty early on (like, late teens), and just accepted what came to me and works for me. The result is the weird anime not quite anime semi realism mixture that I have going, and the ratio usually varies depending on what I currently want to do. If I gave you a list of my favorite artists, you’d probably be surprised how little my own art has in common with theirs.Subject matter? WELLLLLL my original stuff comes from what I told you above, additionally, I studied medieval literature for a reason, and I loved mythological tales from my teenage years onwards. I’m much less enthusiastic about them now, but it used to influence my original art for quite a few years.…Also, I obviously like to do fanart. Like, a lot.

Also spoilers: I obviously love Zesty a tiny bit too much, because for no other fandom the streak of fanart has ever been holding up for two years and still counting without an end in sight, and I’ve never come up with any AUs, either. Usually my ideas went straight into original material, and this original material usually got top priority, but here it’s different, and I’m not sure whether it’s a good or a bad thing, haha. So basically don’t wait for my original stories* until I’m either a) done with the Zesty fandom or they’ve united and kicked me out or b) I’ve actually drawn at least four more full scale elaborate illustrations, have created the four or five AUs that I keep doodling for and ranting about, and I have finally run out of steam. Bets are up what happens first.

If you want specifics, it’s always easier to determine inspiration for a particular piece than in general. It can be so many different things.

* Although I still very, very much like some of my ideas and would actually love to do them. I just love to do low-effort Zesty fanart more XD. Shocking! But honestly, I am as surprised as anyone else that my muses shifted as much as they have, and mid-twenties me would never have guessed she’d fall into this rabbit hole in no time…

“And what keeps you motivated?”

I never… really needed to push myself to be motivated. It’s always been intrinsic. I had pictures in my head, I wanted them out. So I had to learn how, and do it. I have ideas in my head. I want to share them. I very much like this thing others have made. I want to tell the entire world how much I love it, so I do by drawing fanart. Simple as that.Positive responses (and asks like this!!) are a great motivator to POST art, but not to DO the art. The latter is intrinsic.Actually, probably TOO intrinsic. Because I keep drawing the things I WANT to draw and not those which would teach me new skills and thus help with “make money with art” thing. So I guess it’s a bit of a mixed bag, haha.I started drawing daily instead of just regularly at some point during my master’s studies, so roughly 8-5 years ago? Whenever I’m on the road or beaten by illness or bad feelings, I sometimes only manage very simple, super bad sketches, but it’s better than nothing. Luckily, it’s not like that every day (still more often that I’d like to, though).

If you’re wondering:Yes, I’ve had artblocks. Usually not in the sense of “I don’t have ideas”, but VERY MUCH in the sense of “I don’t feel like any of the ideas I have right now” and also “nothing I touch turns out the way I want it to turn out”. To all artists out there: it goes away. Believe me. Your stupid period will be over next week (to the guys out there: that’s not a joke. It DOES affect my general condition). It will be better the moment YOU feel better from whatever you’re currently suffering from.Yes, I’ve also scrapped ideas not because I didn’t like them after all, but because I tried and just failed repeatedly at executing them. Yes, I’ve had such bad times in life that I didn’t want to do ANYTHING. That included art. I just. didn’t. want. to. do. anything. Sometimes I still have these phases, but at least it no longer lasts for months straight without break.

“And this next one might be a bit personal, but do you have moments of self doubt?”

Pfft. Of course. Show me an artist who hasn’t. I’ve learned by now that you can acquire every skill you want. The question is whether you have the time and the will for it. If I had started drawing daily much earlier in life, and if I’d practiced more of the things I’m not good at instead of doodle shitposting, I’d be at an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT level than I am now. Even if I had STILL studied what I studied as I did (as I said, medieval literature, nothing art related). I’ve been drawing ever since I could hold a pencil and my parents have always been supportive, so that wasn’t a problem, I just wasn’t aware all these years that it could be something future me might want. Past me couldn’t have KNOWN. It’s okay, in a way. I can do the things I WANT to do by now. Not always as majestically as the ideas deserve, but it does the job. I don’t need to be able to do hyper realistic portraits, or hyper detailed interiors of space ships, for example. (it would be cool to be able to draw musical instruments tho. I’d love to learn 2D animation, too, but WHEN??) In short, am I aware that I’m not god and that my skills are limited in comparison to many other artists? Yes. Is that a problem? No.Do I doubt whether I can do my job, though? Very much yes. Because successful freelance artists don’t only need skill, they need to sell themselves, and I suck at that most epically. Do I miss the times when I didn’t even think about becoming better but simply drew for fun? Pretty much, yeah. Do I miss the times when I still had the ability to concentrate on elaborate, large paintings? Yes, I do. But I can’t turn my brain back to 10 year old. So I’ll have to deal with what I have now.

If you’re wondering whether I had moments of self doubt about my ideas, then, yes, very super much yes. I am convinced that the things you produce should be what YOU want to see. I want to draw what I want and tell the stories I WANT TO SEE AND READ. As I said, I’m doing it because I want these things to exist. Does it still hurt if nobody else likes these ideas? Yes, yes it does very much. It’s not even that I start thinking my ideas were bad, but that I start thinking “Nobody understands me and nobody will ever be able to like me because they don’t like my ideas, and my ideas are part of me”. Which is true, but it is ALSO true that you do not have to like every single idea some other person has to like them or be friends with them, I am aware of that, but if I may be honest here, it’s still a thought that I can’t quite get rid of, and still gets me angsty whenever I share some of my story ideas with anyone.

“How do you deal with it?”

I don’t. Ahem. Truth be told, I never really developed a proper coping mechanism for failures, and I don’t exactly like that about myself, but I still haven’t found a proper solution. As much as I stress that I do the things I do because I actually want to, I also told you that it scares me to see people disagreeing. It’s not only art related, whenever I feel I messed something up (school ie. marks, socialisation, whatever), it eats at me for days or even weeks until something positive happens (like, better marks, a compliment, anything). I don’t really like it, mostly because it starts a vicious cycle, but that’s how it is. I had surprisingly little problems with that during my university years because I had good marks, but I still mess up at least 50% of all the social interaction I do. It’s not always that easy with art, either.Story time.I remember one conversation with an artist who’s teaching art classes at my (ex) university, like, portrait drawings and flower paintings. So at some point when I started trying to live on art, I asked her whether she’d be interested in offering classes for other art styles as well, like comic drawing classes. She said she’d be interested, so I wanted to talk to her in person, but she never replied to that email reply. I decided to be bold for once, grabbed my portfolio, and went to her after one of her classes to show her what I’m doing. Put on the spot, she admitted that she didn’t reply any further because she didn’t like what I was doing. It was good from a technical aspect, but it seemed dull and uninspired to her, like something she had seen too many times already.I was devastated.I’ve always had to deal with underwhelming responses from peers and friends, too, but I also got some really sweet reactions and genuine support, so it was kind of a mixed bag, overall. I wasn’t used to that kind of harsh rejection of who I am.

Am I also very, VERY petty and jealous? Hell, yes. I get VERY jealous whenever I see people whose art is on my level or below but they still manage to make money with it, and have 10-100 times the amount of followers I have and/or get more enthusiastic responses online. It just makes me angry. The only way of coping I’ve ever found is stay the fuck away. I KNOW that it’s not these people’s fault if I’m jealous, and goddamn, freelance artist life is hard enough as it is. We don’t need to tear other apart. Surely they worked their asses off to be where they are. Heck, I’m friends with some. I keep away from those people so I can calm down and stop being angry, before I start lashing out at artists just because they get the attention they need and deserve. It’s not THEIR fault that I need money and also reassurance.

The only thing that ever worked for me to overcome any of these issues is just continue nevertheless. Keep doing what you’re doing. Remember what you love and why and JUST KEEP DOING IT. Even if you don’t see the point right now. Chances are you will see that point again. Maybe you never will. But IF you ever do, you want to make damn sure that you didn’t drop the ball in the meantime. There’s that saying that you can lose if you fight, but you can’t win if you never fight. It’s true. Be stubborn and show the world your middle finger.Spoilers: I’m teaching comic style drawing classes for the “rivaling” institute now. Always only in super small groups and it’s badly paid, so I don’t know for how long I’ll be able to keep it up, but it’s a start, right?

I hope that answered your questions!

Last remark: always remember, kids: you HAVE to produce the content you want to see yourself. Nobody is gonna do it for you unless you pay them. So. I’m doing it. Against better judgment, lol.…and watch The Secret of Kells.

#random rambling tag

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miximax-hell · 7 years ago

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Hey, guys! It sure has been long since my last new miximax, hasn’t it? The worst part is that I haven’t even run out of ideas--I’m just too bad and lazy to bring them to life properly. That’s what I get for never practising. Don’t be like me. Be like my coworker, who is a 3D artist and has decided to devote one day a week to practising HARD no matter how busy or tired he is, because he doesn’t get to model too often at work and he doesn’t want to get too rusty. Now that’s a good example to follow.

Today’s miximax is a bit of a surprise, as it’s the first time I’m giving a new miximax to a character who canonically got one in the games and the anime. Or, well, it would be a surprise if you hadn’t read my Characters tab, but I’m sure you have ALL done that. So, rather than a surprise, it’s more like an “oh, finally.” ww

While I most certainly have nothing against Shinsuke’s real miximax nor Liu Bei, I think he was lacking something rather important. And, all things considered, I felt like the best candidate to fill in for this position was Cao Cao. The name might ring a bell, but you might not be completely sure about whom I’m talking about. To refresh your memory, I’ll simply say that it’s the guy Zanark first miximaxed with. Yes, when he had that cool Keshin and the white hair. Yes, the evil man.

...Raptors! RAPTORS! NO, RAPTORS! LISTEN TO ME BEFORE YOU COME AND RIP MY NECK OFF WITH YOUR FANGS AS YOU SHOUT, “SHINSUKE WOULD NEVER MIXIMAX WITH THAT GUY.” OKAY?! PLEASE!!

So, as usual, you can listen to me under the cut.

Have you put down your torches and pitchforks, you stereotypical rioting citizens? Yes? Good. Then, let me explain this carefully. I swear it will make much more sense when I’m done.

First, let me explain why I think Shinsuke needed a new miximax and why Liu Bei alone simply doesn’t cut it.

For a second, and even if it’s my least favourite season, let’s think about the first season of Go, when Shinsuke was introduced to us. Even though he’s been consistently used as a goalkeeper in Chrono Stone and Galaxy due to the potential Sangoku and Endou saw in him (and his Keshin), he was a defender when Go started.

And I’ll go even further: Shinsuke has always had block hissatsus in every game he’s been featured in, even when he was actually labelled as a goalkeeper (aka, in CS and Galaxy). In fact, in the first game, he doesn’t even learn goalkeeper hissatsus throughout the story--he only gets God Hand at a pretty high level, way after completing the main campaign. Until halfway through Chrono Stone, and having been Raimon’s main goalkeeper since halfway through Go, he didn’t get his first catch hissatsu. And even though he has been in every single Strikers game, he only became able to play as a (reliable) goalkeeper in the last game. Until then, he was nothing more than a defender or a midfielder at most.

All these are cold, hard fact that I simply can’t ignore--blame it on my compulsive behaviour. Regardless of what his Keshin is best at, no one can question that, much like Endou, Shinsuke can function both as a field player and as a goalkeeper, and whether he should play in one position or the other should heavily depend on the situation.

It doesn’t, though.

Shinsuke is strong because of his goalkeeping resources. Sure, his natural abilities help, but those same abilities proved themselves useful in the field as well, so that’s hardly a valid excuse. However, the main difference between Endou and Shinsuke, and what makes putting Endou in the field MUCH more useful than doing the same thing with Shinsuke, is what Endou adds to the team by being able to move freely. Endou is a good player, but, most importantly, he performs roles no one else can perform in his team. He is part of many, many strong hissatsus that can lead the team to victory; he is the only libero the team has, and his natural strength and experience as a goalkeeper make him a force to the reckoned with when it comes to blocking opposing shots with his Megaton Head. In other words, he is not replaceable, as no one can do what he does quite the way he does it.

Shinsuke, on the other hand, while he has the uniqueness of his insane jumping skills, feels quite lackluster in comparison. He can use Kattobi Defense to block opposing shots, sure, but Kariya’s Hunter’s Net or Kirino’s Deep Mist do this too. He can use Buttobi Jump to block shots with his own shot, but he is completely outclassed by Tetsukado bby’s much stronger Dead Straight--and even by his own Kattobi Defense, really. He could use his Keshin to defend in a pinch, but its hissatsu is exclusively for goalkeeping, so Kirino, Kinako or Tobu would do a much better job at it. He doesn’t even have a Soul, so he can hardly compete with Earth Eleven players either. And considering Liu Bei is a goalkeeper, mixitransing really doesn’t help him all that much either.

In order to become a truly relevant defender again, Shinsuke must spice things up big time. He doesn’t just need something/someone as wonderful as his first miximax--he needs even more than that. He needs to kick it up a notch and get on everyone’s level fast and effectively if he is to put up a good fight. And, with goalkeepers as extremely strong as MamoDai (I’m totally not biased here ww) and the fact that they never know with whom they’ll be paired in a match, the more roles Shinsuke can effectively perform, the better.

Now, the question is: having every universe in existence available, why would Shinsuke settle for Cao Cao, who is the direct enemy of Liu Bei, whom Shinsuke comes to deeply admire? (And, most importantly, why give Cao Cao to Shinsuke when there’s a perfectly perfect Zanakurou lying around?)

First of all, let’s look at Cao Cao as an Inazuma character. You can do so too here. If you take a quick look at that page, you can see that, in the games, Cao Cao is a scoutable character. And not only that, but he’s a defender, so we’re doing good so far. ww

Cao Cao doesn’t have any exclusive and super cool hissatsus in the game, but he does have an exclusive and super cool Keshin: Gouriki no Genbu. You’ll remember it, since Zanark made use of it. Quite the odd choice, since Zanark is a forward and both Cao Cao and his Keshin are defenders, but that plays even more in our favour, as it wouldn’t be a good match for Zanakurou either. ww With the extra strength of a historical figure as strong as Liu Bei, and with a second and all-mighty Keshin at his disposal, Shin Cao suddenly becomes a much more interesting option. Good enough to scratch that itch in my head that repeats over and over, “HEY, IF A MIXIMAX WENT EVENTUALLY UNUSED THE ANIME/GAME, YOU OUGHT TO USE IT AGAIN. OTHERWISE, I’LL KEEP HAMMERING YOUR BRAIN WITH THIS NAGGING AND UNSHAKEABLE FEELING OF LACK OF ACCOMPLISHMENT.” Man, ain’t it fun!

Now, let’s remember one thing. In this project, the vessel chooses their aura, which means that Shinsuke would have to want Cao Cao in order to miximax with him. Which takes me back to those raptors who almost killed me before I even started talking and their shouting: “SHINSUKE WOULD NEVER MIXIMAX WITH THAT GUY.” As much as I and the itch in my head want it, it needs a certain degree of logic.

Let’s be historically objective for a second here. Winners write history. So they say, and they are completely right. Not to start a fire here, but if the N*zis had won (won’t risk being filtered because of this), we would all be N*zis now, and those who weren’t would be treated like N*zis are treated now. That’s just how it is. But that didn’t happen, and now we see those people as pure evil. I’m not saying that hatred isn’t justified--I’m just saying that things could be extremely different if the outcome had been different. Are we good, raptors? Are we friends? You won’t rip my neck off? You won’t call the cops on me? Good. Then, let’s move on.

Historically, Liu Bei and Cao Cao were, indeed, battling it up during the Three Kingdoms period. The most popular, although fictional, depiction of this period is the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, one of the 4 great works of classical Chinese literature (the other 3 being Journey to the West, Dream of the Red Chamber and Water Margin). In this novel, Liu Bei is depicted as the hero, and Cao Cao is depicted as the evil villain. This depiction can be seen in Chrono Stone too, as Raimon takes Liu Bei’s side and portrays him as a goody-two-shoes, while Cao Cao is so evil, cruel and tyrannical that Zanark starved for and stole his dark power.

However, prior to this less-than-positive depiction, Cao Cao was, and I quote, “praised as a brilliant ruler and military genius who treated his subordinates like his family.“ Not so bad, huh? And even more so when you consider that Liu Bei was one of Cao Cao’s generals and he betrayed Cao Cao out of the blue--and with great violence, at that. It’s all about points of view, as usual. When war happens, there is hardly ever a battle of light versus darkness. One party is not usually vastly morally better than the other. Chances are that, if war happens, both parties will believe they are fighting for what’s right, and history will ultimately grace the winner by saying they were right. Whether they have ulterior motives or not (and they usually do--greed is practically omnipresent where there’s war) doesn’t change the fact that they believe they are doing the right thing while the other party is wrong.

If Shinsuke were to see that not everything is black and white, which Inazuma is usually all about (”you thought it was pure darkness, but it was me, *+*+*Complex Character Development and Grey Motivations*+*+*!”), and tried to see things from Cao Cao’s perspective, he would probably find a ruler whose wits can compare to Zhuge Liang’s, who is caring and loyal to his people, who was so widely revered that he was given an important title after his death, and who possessed abilities that, according to our standards, are the polar opposite of evil and wrong-doing: martial arts and poetry. He would find that, while Liu Bei is righteous, hot-headed and charismatic, albeit a bit on the overactive side, Cao Cao is reliable, serious, intelligent and strong, although somewhat on the darker side (as depicted in the Inazuma universe, at least). Kageyama showed us that having darkness within you doesn’t make you inherently bad, though, so... there’s that.

Not only is Cao Cao Liu Bei’s polar opposite, but Shinsuke’s, too, and that allows for very, very interesting dynamics--especially when you compare how Shinsuke acts depending on whom he uses upon mixitransing. As such, Shinsuke gets a genuinely evil look in this case, but that’s just to match his actual in-game look and supposed attitude. But, well, those things come into the personality and design sides of this blog, respectively so they are matters I won’t discuss this time.

Okay, raptors, I’m done. If you’re still thirsty after all of that, come and get some of this.

#Nishizono Shinsuke #Inazuma Eleven #Inazuma Eleven Go #miximax #mixi max #info #settei #reasons behind the miximax #Shinsei Raimon #Chrono Storm #Earth Eleven

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amycathryn · 6 years ago

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Bad Psychic

Why I'm even writing this.

In a perfect world, there would be no bad psychics. All psychics would be honest, everyone would be deeply connected with their intuition, and Nutella would be free.

In a perfect world.

In short: I'm frustrated.

I'm frustrated with bad psychics giving unethical readings. Unfortunately, big egos have put a negative stereotype around this profession, and I'd like to shed some light on that. In this blog post, I'll give some clarity on how to spot the differences between a good and a bad psychic reading.

Another reason I'm writing this is because people value the words of a psychic. Many clients seek us out when they're vulnerable and in need. As psychics, it's our job to step out of the way and let the divine (spirit) give them the guidance they need, and remind the client that they're in control of their own lives. Anyone doing differently is on a power trip or trying to sell you something, and shouldn't be in this profession.

Another reason psychics can give bad readings is because they aren't channeling properly. They're tuning into the wrong frequencies (something other than their guides) and delivering messages from something other than the highest vibrating frequencies. This leaves plenty of opportunity for the ego to step in and mess things up with hubris and self-gratifying false statements. Most often, these types of psychics don't even realize they're doing it. It's usually a result of a psychic not practicing proper energetic hygiene, and their ego creeping in a bit. Regardless of whether a psychic is deliberately giving a bad reading or not, It's important for clients to spot the "tells" of a bad reading so they can discern whether or not the information gleaned is something they should take seriously.

How to spot a bad psychic

The quickest way to spot a bad psychic depends on how you answer the following question:

How did the reading make you feel?

Did the reading inspire you, or upset you? Did you receive clarity, or did you feel like you were put in more of a fog? Did you cry after your reading because you were empowered, or because you were scared or hurt? Were you energized after your reading, or drained?

In short, a bad psychic (and a bad reading) will upset and/or drain you. Regardless of what is channeled, it's the delivery that is crucial when it comes to a psychic's ethics. Does that mean all readings should be positive? Not necessarily. Should all readings be empowering? Absolutely. Don't misunderstand me, clients don't always receive the news they want. I'd love to be able to predict everyone's lottery numbers — but alas, that has yet to happen. I'm not saying all psychics should be "Pollyannas", either. It's how the information is delivered (in a way that reminds the client they're in control of their own lives) that matters most. Psychics should always deliver messages of caution with love and the knowledge that the client has the power and is in control.

Spotting a bad psychic

Here's a list of some of the things bad psychics do during readings, and why they're bad. If you see a psychic doing any of these things during a reading, run for the hills!

Black readings — One of my biggest pet peeves. A "black" reading is when a psychic tells you that you or someone close to you is going to die, or something tragic or negative will happen. This is inaccurate for 2 reasons: First, spirit doesn't reveal to us the exact time, date, or how we're going to die. That's not how life (or even death!) works, and how we pass is up to our higher selves because of: Second, FREE WILL. Time is written in sand, not stone. Fate is anything but "fixed", and anything unpleasant in our futures can always be lessened or avoided altogether with the choices we actively make in the present. If a reader doesn't clarify these things, they're just trying to scare you.

"You're cursed!" — No, you're not. This is a classic tactic amongst con artists. It's usually followed with, "I can remove it for x-amount of dollars". "Curses" only have as much effect on you if you believe them. I have yet to have a client that's been "cursed". Besides, if anyone was throwing negative juju at you, there's PLENTY of metaphysical tools out there that any psychic can point you towards in order to protect yourself. You don't need a psychic or a spiritualist to solve your problems. We're only here to give you the tools you need to solve your problems yourself.

"You need to come back for more readings/sessions/etc..." — No, you don't. It's the goal of a psychic to make a client less dependent on the reader. Any reader that claiming that you need more readings or sessions is more focused on sales than the healing. That's usually a good indicator that they're stuck in their ego (and focused on making money) more so than helping you. A good psychic will sometimes even put a restriction up with clients (such as only one reading a month) to keep clients from becoming addicted to readings.

3rd-party information — When a reader starts going into another person's personal life without their consent, that's not a reading. That's being nosey. That's also a good indicator that they're giving an empathic reading, when they should be channeling the information (that's two different frequencies). Unless it's your underaged child or an extenuating circumstance, what's going on in someone else's life is none of your business, or the psychic's for that matter. Discretion and privacy should always be taken into consideration during a reading.

Throwin' shade — When a reader starts dropping names and dissing other psychics, run. This is a sign they're in their own ego, and not in the best place to give a reading. It's kind-of an unwritten rule amongst psychics to not judge each other. We're all different. We all read differently. We're all going to channel information in a different way, and that's what makes us unique. There's no "right" or "wrong" way to read — as long as it's from a humble space and channeled from the divine. How one psychic reads the cards, or what type of scrying tool they use shouldn't be judged as right or wrong. When a psychic starts comparing themselves to others, or worse, claiming they're the "best", run! I can guarantee this person isn't going to give you an accurate reading because they're too deep in their own ego. In the end, we're all on the same team. We need to support each other, not cut each other down.

Obsessed with labels — Having a PhD doesn't make one psychic better than another. I've noticed there are a lot of classes on psychic development and spirituality out there, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. I myself have taken classes. It's getting fixated on the labels and waving them around (as a form of comparison to other psychics) that the problem arises (see previous point). A good psychic focuses on how they can be of service to the client, not how much they get to brag to themselves.

Constant validation — When a reader needs constant validation, that's usually a red flag. It's to be expected with beginners, but not professionals. Another thing to look out for is generalities (read: Barnum effect) and excessive repeating and body language reading. That's usually a good indicator that they're too busy focusing on whether they got that one thing "right" with you than on staying in channel to relay the information like they're supposed to.

The Ego Monster

The "ego monster" is a term I borrowed from John Edward's book, Infinite Quest. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it. The ego is indeed a monster that can find its way influencing even the best of us. It's the hubris within ourselves that can very easily get in the way of the message in any psychic reading. It's the inner drive to be flashy and feel important. When the ego monster gets in the way, it overshadows our ability to be humble and receive accurate messages for our clients.

The ego monster is dangerous for both readers and clients because it not only gets in the way of providing accurate readings, but it also limits the reader from their own spiritual growth. When a reader stays in their ego for too long, they end up starting to block themselves from the messages they need to receive in order to advance spiritually.

A good psychic just shows up and does the work. The only reason we should be psychics at all is to help others. It's not about feeling special or important, and it certainly isn't about the money. If a psychic is pursuing this profession for any other reason than to help people, they should not be in this profession.

Psychics aren't special

"I'm not a special little snowflake" is something I often find myself saying to my clients. Everyone can hone this skill and do what I do. The sole purpose I do readings is because I find it fulfilling to help people in this way. It brings me joy. That's the only reason why I do this.

Call me crazy, but it's my goal — and I think it should also be the goal of every other psychic — to make my profession redundant. Moot. It's my goal to show my clients that they don't need me — and to give them the tools they need to empower themselves with positive spiritual knowledge. Spirituality and intuition should be normalized, not hoarded. The more we empower our clients, the more we're spreading and normalizing spirituality. The more we normalize it, the more our society is in touch with God and the divine. The more everyone connects to God, the more this world becomes a better place.

Isn't that what we all should strive for?

#spirituality #psychic #reading #intuition #bad psychic

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