#and finally some of the art I'm most proud of will make sense to you guys :'D

[ijustmissyouraccenths]

The Alchemy

AU where Harry is the star quarterback at his college and y/n is an English major.

Based very loosely off The Alchemy by Taylor Swift

CW: Smut

Word Count: 6,871

Leaving my family to go to University was a bittersweet decision. My heart tugged at the thought of being away from them, but my passion for mastering the art of English pulled me towards my dream. My family had always been my biggest supporters and I wanted to make them proud by becoming an English professor. This meant leaving behind my comfortable life in a small suburban town in Florida to study abroad at one of the most prestigious universities. The campus was nestled in the very heart of where literary greats had once roamed and created their masterpieces. It was as if the walls exuded inspiration and creativity, urging me to chase after my dreams with even more fervor. Though I missed my family dearly, I knew that this journey would lead me to become the best version of myself and honor their unwavering support and love.

It was a whirlwind of experiences as I made my way through the unfamiliar streets. The currency conversion was a constant challenge, with every transaction feeling like a game of guesswork. And then there was the driving - on the opposite side of the road no less - which required all of my concentration to avoid any mishaps. But perhaps most daunting of all was the non-stop partying at pubs, a culture shock for someone like me who had grown up in a small town in America.

Thankfully, I was able to find a flat that was within walking distance from the school, and even luckier to have another American girl as my roommate. Mia was a sweet, bubbly girl from the middle of nowhere Kansas, embracing every aspect of British culture including the pub scene and the charming local lads.

Living with Mia meant constantly having people over, and it seemed like every night brought new faces into our home. I didn't mind too much, mostly enjoying the lively atmosphere and meeting new people. However, there were definitely some moments that tested my patience, like when one of Mia's friends named Arthur ended up getting sick and leaving his mark in our kitchen. Despite these occasional hiccups, I was grateful for this experience abroad and all the unique encounters it brought my way.

Though Mia's social butterfly nature could be trying at times, I appreciated her warm companionship in this foreign place. It was on one such night, after we had cleaned up the remnants of Arthur's ill-fated escapades, that we found ourselves cozied up with mugs of tea and watching the rain patter against the windows. 

Mia was unusually pensive as she stared out into the drizzly Manchester night. "You know," she began softly, "sometimes I wonder if I'm chasing the wrong dreams. My parents wanted me to become a doctor or lawyer, something stereotypically successful, but I just wanted adventure. Now here I am, living it up in England, but it all feels...empty, like I'm still searching for meaning."

I nodded thoughtfully, sensing the vulnerability in her words. Though Mia put on a bubbly facade, there was more depth to her than met the eye. 

"I think the great thing about being here is that we have time to figure it all out," I offered gently. "We're writing our own stories, not just following someone else's script." 

Mia smiled, some of the spark returning to her eyes. "You're right. That's exactly why I love being here with you."

As the rain continued to drum against the windows, Mia and I sat in comfortable silence for a moment, each lost in our own thoughts. Finally, Mia turned to me with a curious expression.

"Do you ever have doubts about your dreams, too?" Mia asked, her voice tinged with vulnerability.

I considered her question for a moment before responding, "All the time. Sometimes I wonder if I'm on the right path or if I'm just going through the motions."

Mia nodded understandingly, her eyes reflecting the shimmer of uncertainty. "It's scary, isn't it? The idea that we might wake up one day and realize we've been chasing a dream all along."

I placed a comforting hand on Mia's shoulder. "It is scary, but it's also part of the journey. We're allowed to question and evolve along the way."

She smiled weakly, her gaze drifting back to the rain-splattered window. "I guess that's what makes life interesting, right? The uncertainty of it all."

Our conversation was interrupted by a sudden knock on the door. Mia got up to answer it, revealing a group of our friends who had decided to brave the rainy night for an impromptu gathering.

"Come in, come in!" Mia exclaimed cheerfully, ushering everyone inside. The room quickly filled with laughter and chatter as our friends settled in.

As I looked around the group, my eyes landed on a few familiar faces who have crossed paths with me several times before. Among them was Arthur, a friendly face that always brought a sense of comfort and familiarity. As everyone piled into the room, my gaze wandered to him - Harry Styles, the renowned quarterback of our school's football team. I couldn't help but feel a tinge of excitement at being in the presence of such a well-known athlete. When I first arrived from the United States, I had assumed the term "football" referred to what we call soccer back home. But as I soon discovered, American Football was just as beloved and popular in the UK.

Harry noticed me looking his way and met my gaze. There was an intensity in his green eyes that made me quickly avert my own, focusing instead on my friend Grace who was animatedly sharing a story next to me. 

I tried to tune into her words, but my thoughts kept drifting back to the handsome footballer across the room. By all accounts, Harry was cocky, brash, and a bit of a player. And yet, I couldn't deny there was something magnetic about him. He carried himself with a self-assured swagger, his athletic frame filling out his clothes in a way that betrayed his strength. 

I scolded myself internally. Just because he's nice to look at doesn't change the fact that he seems like an arrogant jock. Still, when our eyes met again, I felt a flutter in my stomach I couldn't ignore. 

Harry said something to his friend that made the group erupt into laughter. He flashed a crooked smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. I quickly looked away once more, but the image of his smile lingered in my mind.

Get it together, I told myself sternly. Harry is off-limits. With his reputation, getting involved would only lead to trouble. I turned my focus back to Grace, pushing all thoughts of Harry's eyes, smile and broad shoulders out of my head. 

For the rest of the night, I avoided looking in Harry's direction, though I could feel his gaze on me periodically as the hours wore on. By the time people started trickling out, I felt certain I had avoided any direct interaction with the dashing footballer. 

That is, until I went to lock the door behind the last guest and found him standing there. He flashed that crooked smile again as he leaned against the door frame. "See you around, Y/N," he said, holding my gaze for a moment before disappearing into the night. I stood frozen, my heart racing as I replayed those five simple words in my head.

As I stood there in shock at Harry's unexpected presence, I couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions swirling inside me. His parting words echoed in my mind, leaving me slightly breathless and unsure of what to make of the situation. Gathering my composure, I locked the door behind him and turned to find Mia watching me with a knowing smile.

"Looks like someone caught your eye, Y/N," Mia teased, nudging me playfully. "Harry Styles, huh? Quite the charmer."

I flushed slightly at her comment, trying to brush off any implications. "Oh, come on, Mia. It's not like that," I deflected, hoping to downplay the significance of the moment.

But Mia wasn't convinced. "Sure, sure," she replied with a wink. "Just remember, not all that glitters is gold."

Her words lingered in my mind as I bid her goodnight and retreated to my room. Sitting on my bed, I couldn't shake off the image of Harry's smile or the way he had looked at me in that brief moment by the door. The conflicting thoughts swirled in my head, leaving me restless and contemplative.

The following day at school, as I made my way through the bustling halls, I noticed a familiar figure leaning against the lockers up ahead. It was Harry, his usual confident demeanor on full display as he chatted with his friends. As our eyes met briefly, he flashed a grin in my direction before turning back to his conversation.

Feeling a surge of boldness, I approached him tentatively. "Hey, Harry," I greeted him, trying to keep my tone casual despite the flutter in my stomach.

"Hey there, Y/N," he responded with a smirk, his green eyes twinkling mischievously. "Didn't think you'd show up here again so soon."

I felt my cheeks flush at his words. Clearly he was referring to my abrupt exit last night after our brief encounter at the door. I scrambled to think of a clever response. 

"Well, we do go to the same school," I pointed out, trying to keep my voice light despite the nerves I felt. 

Harry chuckled, crossing his arms over his broad chest as he regarded me with amusement. 

"True enough," he conceded. "But I got the sense you were trying to avoid me last night. Did I make you nervous?"

His bluntness took me aback. I opened my mouth to respond, but no words came out. Harry's eyes danced with mirth at my flustered state. 

"Cat got your tongue?" He teased. 

I took a steadying breath, determined not to let him get the best of me. "You wish," I retorted, hoping the bravado in my voice sounded more convincing than I felt. 

Harry laughed, a rich warm sound that made my knees weak. Our eyes locked and in that moment, it was like the noisy hallway melted away and there was only the two of us.

"Feisty. I like it," he murmured. Before I could respond, the warning bell rang, snapping us both back to reality. 

"See you around, Y/N," Harry said with a wink before disappearing into the swarm of students heading to class. 

My body froze in place, heart thudding against my ribs as I gazed at the infamous Harry. He exuded an undeniable air of trouble, and yet, as our charged banter replayed in my mind, I couldn't deny the adrenaline pumping through my veins. With a determined stride, I made my way to class, refusing to let this boy be the cause of my tardiness.

I took a seat in my Studies of Shakespeare class, the one subject I truly loved. The works of William Shakespeare never failed to captivate me, and if you could understand the Elizabethan lingo, his witty humor shone through brilliantly. Unfortunately, this particular teacher seemed to have a talent for draining all the life and humor out of these masterpieces.

I tried to focus as the professor droned on about the themes in Romeo and Juliet, but my mind kept wandering back to my encounter with Harry. Something about our charged banter had awakened feelings in me that I didn't quite understand. 

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a folded piece of paper land on my desk as if taken out of a scene from a movie. I looked around furtively before opening it. In an unfamiliar scrawling handwriting it read:

"What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun." - H

I felt a thrill run through me and quickly tucked the note into my bag before the professor could notice. So Harry was in this class too? I scanned the room subtly until I spotted him a few rows behind me. He caught my eye and gave me a roguish wink.

I turned back to the front, trying to ignore the simmering exhilaration I felt. Over the next few days, the notes kept coming during Shakespeare class, each with a quote or two from the Bard himself. They were usually cheeky and flirtatious, hinting at some blossoming rapport between us.

I found myself anticipating each one, my heart skipping a beat when I would spot a new folded note on my desk. Our eyes would meet across the room, a hidden smile just between us.

After class one day, as I gathered my things, I sensed Harry approach my desk. "So when's our study session?" he asked nonchalantly, though there was a glint of something more in his eyes. I hesitated, knowing I should keep my distance, yet unable to deny I was intrigued.

I nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, trying to appear nonchalant. "Well, I don't know... I've heard you're not the most dedicated studier," I teased, giving him a playful smile.

Harry chuckled, his eyes sparkling mischievously. "Oh, but that's where you're wrong. I may not look like it, but I'm quite the Shakespeare aficionado," he replied with a grin.

I raised an eyebrow in skepticism. "Is that so? Well, I suppose we could arrange a study session... if you can prove your expertise," I challenged, a hint of challenge in my tone.

His grin widened, accepting the challenge. "Consider it done. How about we meet at the library tomorrow after school?" Harry suggested, his gaze unwavering.

I hesitated for a moment, the thrill of anticipation coursing through me. "Alright, it's a date then," I agreed, feeling a rush of excitement at the prospect of spending more time with him.

As the final bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, Harry flashed me one last grin before disappearing into the bustling hallway. My heart raced with both nervousness and exhilaration as I packed up my belongings, eager for our upcoming study session.

The following day at the library, I found myself anxiously scanning the room for Harry. My pulse quickened when I spotted him sitting at a table in the corner, a stack of Shakespearean plays spread out in front of him.

I made my way over to him, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement swirling inside me. "Ready to impress me with your Shakespeare knowledge?" I asked with a teasing smile as I took a seat across from him.

Harry flashed me a charming grin. "Just watch and learn," he said confidently, picking up a copy of Romeo and Juliet and flipping to a random page.

As he began to recite lines from the play with passion and flair, I couldn't help but be captivated by his enthusiasm. His eyes lit up as he delved into each line, bringing the centuries-old words to life in a way that was both mesmerizing and captivating.

By the time our study session ended, I found myself completely enthralled by Harry's interpretation of Shakespeare's works. As we gathered our things to leave, he turned to me with a twinkle in his eye, he knew a lot more about the works than he let on to.

Harry turned to me, “So now that I’ve shown you i’m smart, I know Shakespeare, when are you coming to one of my games?” he asked confidently.

I was taken aback by his forward invitation. Attending one of his football games felt intimate in a way that made me nervous. 

"Oh, um, I don't know..." I fumbled over my words, suddenly feeling shy. 

Harry tilted his head, giving me a crooked smile. "Come on, it'll be fun. I'll even give you a personal tour of the field afterwards," he joked. 

I bit my lip, considering it. There was no denying I felt drawn to him, despite trying to keep my distance. And the thought of seeing him command the field sent a little thrill through me. 

"Alright, I suppose I could stop by," I finally conceded, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear self-consciously. 

Harry's face lit up. "Brilliant! Our next game is on Friday. I'll leave a ticket for you at will call," he said eagerly.

I nodded, butterflies taking flight in my stomach. "Okay, yeah. I’ll see you then," I replied softly. 

Harry gave me a dazzling smile and I felt my knees go weak.

Friday night arrived and I found myself filled with nervous excitement as I made my way to the football stadium. I couldn't believe I had actually agreed to come watch Harry play. As I approached the ticket booth, I gave my name and they handed me the ticket Harry had left for me. 

I found my seat in the packed bleachers and waited anxiously for the game to start. When the players rushed onto the field, I immediately spotted Harry's mop of curly hair. He looked focused and determined as he took his position on the field. 

As the game began, I was immediately drawn in by Harry's commanding presence on the field. His movements were fluid and precise, each pass and dodge executed with passion and skill. With each successful play, the crowd erupted into thunderous cheers, mirroring my own excitement. It was impossible not to join in, jumping to my feet and cheering for Harry along with everyone else.

At halftime, Harry made his way over to the sidelines, sweat glistening on his forehead and tattooed arms, his chest heaving from exertion. As he scanned the crowd for familiar faces, his eyes locked onto mine and a wide grin spread across his face. He waved enthusiastically, causing my cheeks to flush as I shyly waved back in return. 

In the second half of the game, Harry's presence seemed to radiate even more brightly. With each touchdown he scored, his fists pumped triumphantly in the air. The crowd roared and cheered as he ripped off his helmet and hoisted it victoriously above his head, his teammates swarming around him in celebration.

As the stadium emptied out, I stayed behind with a swarm of butterflies fluttering in my stomach. I couldn't wait to see Harry once again. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he emerged from the locker room, his hair still damp from his post-game shower but his eyes shining with joy.

"So, what did you think?" he asked eagerly as he approached me.

"You were truly spectacular out there," I gushed earnestly. A wide grin stretched across Harry's face.

"Come on, let me give you that promised tour," he said playfully, offering me his arm. Laughing, I happily took it and followed him onto the empty field, my heart racing with excitement and admiration for the amazing athlete by my side.

Harry led me onto the empty stadium field, the night air crisp and cool against our skin. He pointed out spots on the grass where pivotal plays had happened, describing them with a passion that revealed his deep love for the game. 

I found myself enthralled, leaning into him as we walked, his arm solid and warm beneath my hand. When we reached the middle of the field, he turned to face me. His eyes were soft, searching my face in the dim glow of the stadium lights. 

"You know, I was afraid you wouldn't come tonight," he admitted quietly. 

I tilted my head. "Why's that?"

He shrugged, a small smile playing on his lips. "You never seemed to like me much before. I figured I wasn't your type."

Heat rose to my cheeks. He wasn't wrong - I'd unfairly judged him as arrogant and cocky. But tonight had shattered those assumptions. 

"I guess I realized there's more to you than meets the eye," I said softly. 

Harry's smile widened. He lifted his hand, gently tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. My breath caught at his touch. Slowly, he leaned in. I let my eyes fall shut in anticipation...

But suddenly, the stadium lights flickered off, plunging us into darkness. We jumped apart in surprise. 

Harry laughed. "Guess that's our cue to head out." 

He took my hand, interlacing our fingers, and led me towards the parking lot. I walked close beside him, hyper-aware of his palm pressed against mine.

As he towered over me, Harry's eyes scanned the street, searching for a car. "Where did you park?" he asked, his voice deep and smooth.

I shifted nervously on my feet, avoiding eye contact. "Oh. Uh. I didn't drive. I just live around the street," I murmured, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. The thought of navigating English roads was terrifying to me.

A warm chuckle escaped from Harry's lips as he looked back down at me. "I can drive you home, love," he offered, extending a hand towards me. His scent wafted towards me - a mix of cologne and something woodsy - and I couldn't help but feel a flutter in my stomach at his closeness.

As Harry and I walked towards his car, our hands still entwined, I felt a sense of excitement and anticipation build within me. "So, tell me more about this amazing game-winning touchdown," I teased, trying to break the silence that had fallen between us.

Harry laughed softly, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he glanced at me sideways. "Oh, you mean the one where I body-slammed the other team's runner into oblivion?" He pretended to flex his muscles playfully. "That was pretty epic, if I do say so myself."

I shook my head, feigning disbelief. "You're such a show-off," I said with a grin. "I bet you were the star of the school playground too."

Harry snorted. "Hardly. I was more of a loner growing up. Spent most of my time with my nose buried in books."

"Really?" I raised an eyebrow in surprise. "And here I thought all jocks were brain-dead."

He laughed again, his laughter echoing through the empty streets as we walked towards his car. When we finally reached it, Harry unlocked the door and gestured for me to get inside. As I slid into the passenger seat, I couldn't help but notice how perfectly he filled the driver's seat - broad shoulders tapering down to narrow hips and long legs. The image of him all sweaty and wet from a shower flashed through my mind, making my cheeks heat up again.

"So," Harry began as he started the engine and pulled out onto the road, his eyes fixed on the road ahead, "tell me more about yourself."

I felt myself blush even harder at his directness but decided to play along. "Well," I said slowly, thinking quickly. "I'm a huge bookworm too - Harry Potter is probably my favorite series ever."

Harry chuckled softly as he glanced at me briefly before looking back at the road. "I can see why you fit right in here in England then."

We drove through the quiet streets in companionable silence for a while before Harry spoke up again. "You know, you don't have to act all tough around me," he said quietly, his eyes still on the road as he slowed down at a stoplight.

I turned to face him fully now, surprised by his words. "I wasn't trying to be tough," I said defensively. "I just didn't want you to think that... well, never mind what I didn't want you to think," I muttered under my breath.

Harry's face softened into a gentle smile as he reached out to brush a strand of hair behind my ear once again - a gesture that sent shivers down my spine despite the warmth of the car interior. "It's okay," he murmured soothingly as he took my hand in his once more and squeezed gently before letting go when the light turned green again.

The rest of our drive was filled with more easy conversation punctuated by moments of awkward silence broken only by the sounds of our breathing and occasional traffic noises outside. When we finally pulled up outside my house I found myself hesitating before opening the car door knowing that this was goodbye.

Under the dim glow of the street lamp, I tentatively turned to face Harry. "Thanks for...for tonight," I stammered out, suddenly self-conscious under his intense gaze. 

His emerald eyes twinkled mysteriously as he simply nodded and began unbuckling his seatbelt. His eyes never left mine, setting off a simmering warmth between us that was hard to ignore. 

"I should probably walk you to your door," he said softly, accentuating each word with an inexplicably seductive lilt. My heart pounded in my chest as we exited the car and made our way towards my apartment.

Once at the front door, we stood facing each other in silence, the air around us thick with unspoken words and desires. I felt his strong fingers gently cradle my chin, tilting my face up to meet his gaze. The intensity of this simple touch sent sparks racing down my spine, pooling heat in places I hadn't even known existed.

"Can I come inside?" His voice was barely a whisper but it echoed loudly in my ears.

My mind screamed caution but my body had other plans. “Yes,” I breathed out, unlocking the door and pulling him inside.

Inside, Harry's lips found mine in a searing kiss that left me breathless. His tongue teased against mine, creating a warm and delicious friction that sent shivers down my legs. As he pressed his hips against me, I could feel the unmistakable hardness growing between us. Our hands roamed freely over each other's bodies, exploring new territory and seeking pleasure through every touch.

Harry's fingers made their way to the waistband of my skirt, pulling it down over my hips and letting it fall to the ground. He lifted me up onto the edge of a nearby table, spreading my legs slightly as he stood between them. The feel of his fingers brushing against my inner thigh caused me to gasp and arch my back in anticipation.

Harry pulled back abruptly,“I’m sorry,” He started, “that was really inappropriate.”

As Harry apologized, his eyes were drawn to the hint of my arousal peeking out from between my legs. His hesitation vanished as his fingers brushed against my wetness once more, this time without pulling away. He groaned in approval and leaned forward, pressing his lips against mine once more. I craved him in the worst ways.

Our tongues tangled as he pushed me back onto the table, spreading my legs further apart. His hands found their way under my shirt, skimming over my stomach before lifting it up, exposing my bra-clad breasts. He took a deep breath, inhaling my scent and trailing his fingers lightly across one tight nipple.

"Harry," I moaned, cavinginto his touch. "Please don't stop."

He smirked wickedly down at me before pulling back slightly. In one swift motion, he yanked my shirt over my head, tossing it aside carelessly. Grabbing hold of both sides of my bra, he pulled it down too with such force that my breasts were freed from their confinement.

I gasped at the sudden rush of air hitting my sensitive nipples but before I could catch my breath, he took one of them into his mouth sucking hard while pinching the other between two fingers, teasing it mercilessly.

"Fuck," I whimpered, clawing at the table underneath me as pleasure coursed through me like lightning. The intense mix of pain and pleasure sent waves of desire crashing over me as I felt myself becoming wetter with every passing second.

Sliding one hand down towards his pants, I slowly undid the button and zipper before slipping my hand inside his boxers to grip him firmly around his growing erection. He groaned into my breast at the contact sending shivers down my spine.

"You want me to fuck you?" he whispered hoarsely against my skin leaving a trail of saliva along my collarbone as he ran his tongue upwards caressingly .

"Yes," I breathed out between parted lips unable to form complete words due to the intensity of emotions running through me. 

My heart raced as his erection throbbed in my hand. I could feel the heat radiating off his skin, mixed with the desire that seemed to emanate from him. His other hand slid down my back, over my ass cheeks, and gripped them roughly, pulling me closer against his hardness.

"Do you have any idea how fucking sexy you are? You and your little shy good girl act" he growled into my neck, nipping at the skin there softly. With one swift movement, he lifted me up onto the countertop, pushing my legs apart with his hips. His mouth trailed kisses along my jawline, down my throat, and on my breasts. 

I arched my back slightly offering myself to him more fully as he took a hungry mouthful of one of my nipples into his mouth sucking on it hard while pinching the other between his fingers causing a sharp intake of breath from me which made him smile devilishly before moving on to devour the other one.

My body trembled with anticipation as he bit my neck playfully, his rough hands sliding over my hips and ass cheeks before pulling me against him. His cock twitched against my wet core, making me whimper in want. "You like that, don't you?" he growled, his voice low and husky. "You're so fucking beautiful."

"Harry," I moaned, my voice reduced to a desperate whimper as he continued teasing me with his words and touches. "Please..."

The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, along with our ragged breathing and the occasional moan. I could feel myself getting lost in the sensations, my body responding eagerly to his movements. His hands were everywhere, tracing over my curves and gripping me tightly as he pounded into me.

My own hands were roaming his back, digging into his flesh as I tried to hold on to something amidst the overwhelming pleasure that was coursing through me. Every inch of my body felt on fire, and I couldn't get enough.

"Fuck," he grunted, his face contorting with pleasure. "You feel so good."

I whimpered in response, unable to form any coherent words as he continued to move inside me relentlessly. My whole world had narrowed down to this moment – his body against mine, the sound of our bodies coming together in a perfect rhythm.

My mind was blissfully blank as he increased his pace, his thrusts becoming rougher and more urgent. I could feel my climax building up within me, like a fire threatening to consume me whole.

And then it hit me like a tidal wave – intense and all-consuming. My back arched off the counter as I cried out his name, my body trembling with pleasure as every nerve ending exploded with ecstasy.

He followed soon after, letting out a loud groan as he spilled himself inside me. We stayed still for a moment, trying to catch our breaths and bask in the aftermath of our passion.

But eventually reality came crashing back around us. Panic started creeping up inside me as I tried to gather my thoughts and make sense of what had just happened. 

As I lay there, my heart still pounding in my chest, he gently pulled out of me and straightened up. His eyes, dark with desire just moments ago, now softened with a mixture of tenderness and regret.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the sound of our heavy breathing. "I shouldn't have let things go this far."

I sat up slowly, feeling a mix of emotions swirling inside me – confusion, guilt, and a lingering sense of pleasure that refused to dissipate. 

"It's not just your fault," I murmured, avoiding his gaze as I tried to gather my clothes around me. "I wanted this too."

He reached out a hand to touch my arm, but hesitated before making contact.

"We should talk about this," he said finally, his tone serious. "About what it means for us."

I nodded slowly, feeling the weight of his words settling between us. What had started as a moment of passion had now morphed into something more complicated, something that demanded attention and discussion.

As we dressed in silence, the air in the room felt charged with unspoken thoughts and emotions. The intensity of our physical connection lingered like a ghost between us, refusing to be ignored.

We began to gather our clothes from around the room, now tainted with the evidence of our reckless choices. Harry buried his face into his shirt before pulling it on, perhaps ruminating on what just occurred, or maybe trying to drown out the reality with the lingering scent of his cologne.

"Y/n," he started after a long silence, pulling his trousers up. His voice sounded strained, an indication that he was struggling with the right choice of words. "I... I didn't mean for this to... I mean, I like spending time with you." He sighed heavily, rubbing his face between his large palms.

I remained silent as I fastened my bra. The finality in his voice was suffocating, making it harder for me to breathe with each passing moment. I felt my heart thumping loudly in my chest – a crude reminder of the complication we had willingly dived into.

"I like you, Y/N," he said finally, his voice a hoarse whisper. The words hung in the air between us, hovering like a dense fog, obscuring any clarity that might lie beyond.

I stopped fumbling with my blouse, my fingers stilled by his confession. "Harry," I began, my voice barely audible. Fear clung to me, making my words tremble.

"I know," he cut me off before I could finish what I started. "I know we're both in different places... Me with football and you with your studies." There was a tingling silence after his statement, as if he was waiting for me to confirm or deny his declaration.

I sighed heavily, tugging at the hem of my blouse, feeling the cool fabric against my still heated skin. "It's not that simple Harry," I admitted, blinking back tears that had started to sting my eyes. "This," I motioned around the room, encompassing our discarded underwear strewn haphazardly around the room - a silent testament to the passion that had just consumed us, "this complicates things."

He ran his hand through his tousled hair and nodded solemnly. "I understand," he replied, a hint of resignation etching lines onto his face. His gaze was heavy with something akin to regret as it met mine.

My breath hitched in my throat at the intensity of his stare. I wanted desperately to reach out and ease the burden that seemed to weigh heavily on him. But reality was an insidious shadow that lurked in our midst, reminding us of the impracticality of our desires.

"I think it's better if we keep our distance for now," Harry broke the silence after what felt like an eternity. His words were like cold water dousing the fire that our bodies had kindled only moments ago.

A feeling of sudden emptiness clawed at me. His words, though probably said in goodwill, felt like a punch to my gut. I swallowed hard, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over.

I nodded, unable to bring myself to utter a word. He stepped towards me and for a moment I thought he would pull me into his arms one last time. But he merely extended a hand that I shook lightly, the gesture felt impersonal after the intimacy we had just shared.

Without another word, he turned and left the room. I stood still in the silence that followed, the sound of his departing footsteps echoing in my ears long after he was gone.

Mia came home later that night, oblivious to the charged atmosphere that still lingered, suffocating and heavy in the air. Her chatter about an extra credit assignment she’d completed was a stark contrast to the silence that had enveloped the room just hours ago. 

“Y/N, are you okay?” she asked suddenly, noticing my distant gaze. I gave her a weak smile in response before excusing myself to bed.

As I lay there in the dark, staring at the ceiling, Harry's words echoed through my mind. "I think it's better if we keep our distance for now." His voice was etched into my memory, roughened by regret and something else I couldn't quite place. His face bore an expression that told me this was as hard for him as it was for me.

The next day was a blur. My classes seemed trivial compared to the turmoil swirling in my mind. My interactions with others were mechanical and flat as if I was watching myself from outside my body.

Football practice was going on when I walked past the field on my way back from the campus library. My eyes instinctively sought out Harry among the sea of players. I found him focused on his game, every muscle in his body straining as he kicked the ball towards the goalpost.

His world seemed unchanged—still revolving around football—while mine felt like it had been knocked off its axis.

The following weeks were no easier. Everywhere I went, I could feel his presence like a phantom pain - a dull ache that refused to fade away. In every conversation, every song playing in the background, every corner of campus - Harry was there.

I knew we had made a rational decision, given our circumstances. But my heart couldn't comprehend what my mind had already accepted.

Months passed and winter set in, blanketing Manchester in white. Serene and beautiful yet so melancholy it mirrored my mood perfectly. The once familiar campus looked different under the soft glow of the snow as if to mirror the change that had occurred in my life.

One evening, as I was walking back from the library, I spotted Harry sitting alone on a bench, bundled up in a thick coat, his breath misting in the frigid air. His eyes were trained on the football field, currently blanketed by snow, and his hands were tucked into his pockets, his usual energy replaced by a pensive quietness.

I hesitated, weighing my options. We hadn't spoken since that night – the night when our worlds collided and then abruptly fell apart. But something drew me towards him – an inexplicable magnetism I had been fighting for so long.

Stepping tentatively closer, I cleared my throat to announce my presence. "Harry," I said softly, trying not to startle him.

He looked up at the sound of my voice, surprise flickering across his features before they settled into guarded neutrality. "Y/N," he responded with a curt nod, but made no move to invite me to sit.

Taking a leap of faith, I lowered myself onto the bench next to him, maintaining some distance while also bracing for the icy cold through my jeans. For several minutes we sat in silence, lost in our own thoughts as we stared out at the snowy field.

"I've missed you." The words slipped out before I could stop them.

He turned toward me then, his emerald eyes soft and searching as they met mine. His lips opened as if to say something but closed again as if reconsidering his words.

"Y/N..." His voice trailed off and there was a long pause before he continued. "I’ve missed you too."

Relief washed over me at his confession but it was quickly replaced with a gnawing sadness as I realized that missing each other wasn’t enough to bridge the gap between us. Our realities were still the same - he was still the star football player with ambitions bigger than Manchester itself and I was still an English major trying to carve out a place for myself in academia.

“Do you ever think about…?” I started, swallowing hard as I tried to voice the question that had been eating at me.

“Us?” He completed my sentence, his voice barely above a whisper. His gaze was heavy but he held it steady, openly showing the vulnerability he usually kept hidden beneath his star athlete facade. “All the time.”

The honesty in his confession hit me harder than I expected. We were both stuck in our respective worlds, looking at each other from afar but never truly reaching out.

I took a deep breath, feeling the biting winter air fill my lungs before exhaling slowly. “We can’t keep doing this, Harry,” I said finally, breaking the silence that had fallen between us.

He looked at me then, his gaze filled with understanding and something else I couldn't quite place. “I know,” he replied softly, his eyes never leaving mine.

The future was uncertain and full of challenges. But if there was one thing I had learnt from this whole ordeal, it was that some chances are worth taking. No matter how daunting they may seem.

[your-local-uwu-artist]

it was suggested I post this to the tags as well >:D

fuck it ima tag @transcendence-au as well because tbh I'm very proud of my silly little animation

some me being a nerd under the cut!

okay so this all started when I read the original post this was inspired by and though 'wouldn't it be silly to add some art to this 3 year old post?' but then I decided to animate it for funsies!

and gosh I sure do love animating!

So I got the base sketch and then got into the lineart animation for each component!

i don't have the sketches/wips saved at all sense this wasn't really a project and it took less than a day to complete. but here's a peak at the timeline

I animate entirely in my ususal drawing software: clip studio paint. It's just what's easiest for me.

all of these layers outside that folder are just the sparkles! after I finished I added some sparkles for fun! there's a lot of them because it involved a lot of copy and pasting sparkle layers

the bottom folders here are the wings body and facial expression! for everything like the wings arms and flags I was able to just copy paste, reverse, and then align the timing correctly in the timeline

one thing unique about this animation is that the lineart and colors are in separate layers! I tend to do line and colors on the same layer but this time I was using a brush that doesn't have the same lack of anti-aliasing and sense it's a small animation I wasn't as worried about keeping a minimum of layers like usual.

also the movement of the body is only 4 frames! and one one of those is just the hat shifting position

initially I wasn't going to have the second facial expression but when I got stuck on animating the flags I added the second facial expression while taking a break.

the arm animation is just 8 frames! honestly the only tricky part in this is the flags, everything else was pretty simple, which made it super fun to work on because I got both a challenge and mindless therapeutic drawing out of it.

NOW THE FLAGS there was 3 throw away attempts before I got it: you see the thing that made this tricky is finding the balance between believability and visual appeal. a big part of animation is creating the illusion of physics, this is the 'believability' part, I need these to look like flags that are moving and made of flat fabric, HOWEVER if I animate these one-to-one with realistic physics: it won't look good! I can't apply wind to the whole drawing because then the hair would have to react, and wind goes one way, and I wan't the flags to be pointing opposite directions. so without wind the flags would be laying down flat, but that won't look good at all! and furthermore realistic physics would have the flag not being all nice and front facing most of the time. so the trick here was figuring out how much physics to apply to make it look believable, while still making it look good.

one trick I did to help me animate the flags is I actually made a plan rectangle flag as a guide so that the general mass/volume of the flag would stay consistent, this is something i highly recommend when animating! like having a circle guide along a characters head to keep their height and proportions consistent.

after I finally found the balance with the flag lineart coloring wasn't too hard! sense I just had to follow the lines, and THANK GOODNESS the trans and aroace flag have the same number of stripes: saving me time!

and then it all comes together to make a satisfying perfectly looping bundle of cuteness >:DDD I feel like the tau fandom doesn't have as many artists with particularly cartoony/chibi art styles so I've gotta play my part in spreading the joy-whimsy-adorable-sillys >:D

anyway! hope you get to see a cool beetle today :D

[asklilmissrarity]

The Future of Lil Miss Rarity

Hello everyone, this is Jay Tonique (formerly known as Lil Miss Jay), the writer, artist, everything other than the music in the Lil Miss Rarity animation for the blog "Lil Miss Rarity."

As some of you know, Lil Miss Rarity was an ongoing outlet for my physical, verbal and emotional abuse I was suffering prior to and leading up to Lil Miss Rarity's release, October 11th 2011.

The blog took off so heavily that my entire artistic career became a viable future for me, allowing me to profit from my art, build a huge loving fanbase, and even allowing me to become something of a celebrity in the Brony community (even very much hated by a large portion of the community).

It's needless for me to say that Lil Miss Rarity not only changed but saved my life. I was on the verge of taking my own life around the time the blog was started, due to the abuse I was going through, and if it weren't for the success of the blog that fateful October week, I would certainly not be here, typing this right now. I owe my life to you all, and the support you've given me for this blog.

However, it's time for the news I know very few people want to hear. In fact, I'm sure just reading this line right here has people's hearts sinking, but please, don't be anxious, please read the full post.

I would like to say: Please read the full post, I am going to be very clear about the future.

Moving forward, Lil Miss Rarity will no longer be updated, and the blog is officially entirely over, as of this post.

I am still looking for a musician to commission a new song for the remake of the Lil Miss Rarity animation on YouTube, which will be my final major update involving the blog, and then I will be putting the blog entirely to rest. The animation will serve as a fond emotional farewell to Lil Miss Rarity.

However, that's not the end of the twisted grimdark storytelling. I have decided to make a spiritual successor, a new IP, entirely my own and not using My Little Pony as a crutch.

I won't get too into it, but I left the Brony fandom long ago. It was both the greatest thing to ever happen in my life, and the absolute worst thing to ever happen in my life. I met great friends, but also met unbelievably horrible sick people, many of which I literally got FBI involvement to deal with and many of which are literally in prison now.

Due to this, and many many more reasons I'm leaving out, I cannot and will not continue to be a part of the fandom. This is just a few reasons, as well, that continuing to have Lil Miss Rarity exist as a My Little Pony blog just doesn't make any sense to me.

So what am I doing moving forward?

A brand new IP called "Melodi." It's about a magic school student who is part of a wealthy family who goes on a magical twisted adventure in a horrifying grimdark world.

It will have characters either very slightly or very heavily inspired by the characters of Lil Miss Rarity, with Melodi of course being inspired by Rarity.

It will also be an ongoing web comic, similar to LMR, and will encourage fan feedback just as much as LMR did, but will not be an Ask Blog like LMR.

I plan to release character concepts for the cast of Melodi soon.

Now, there's probably a lot of questions moving forward, so I'll try to answer them now, as well as in asks on this blog, though I'd prefer you send the asks about Melodi to my main blog at http://www.jayisbutts.com/ask

Here's some questions I think will be asked, and I'll answer them here:

"Will this blog be on Tumblr?" - Yes, and on Patreon. Each update will be on Patreon first. When an update comes out on Patreon, the previous update will go public at the same time on Tumblr.

"Don't you think the LMR fanbase you've garnered for 12 years are gonna be upset about this?" - I'm 100% certain they will be, yes. However, I hope that most people who hear this news are excited to see Melodi in the future. I'm very proud of what I've created with LMR, and happy about how many lives I've changed and how many people have told me how much they love LMR. People with the heart-brand tattoo, people with LMR tattoos, people who cosplay as LMR, LMR fanart still being made regularly to this date, real-life Opal dolls, fan-dubs of the comic, fan animations, Anime Music Videos, etc etc etc. I love each and every one of you and I hope that I can one day garner the same amount of love for Melodi as I received for LMR. Thank you all so much for your support.

"What if someone else wants to carry on the LMR blog or use the characters to make their own?" - Please, do. LMR is officially Public Domain as of this post, and I strongly encourage LMR fan-fiction, fan-blogs, etc. I would love if someone could do LMR better than I did. I will very happily use this blog going forward to showcase new LMR blogs and fan-content that I like, and I will very gladly be a guest artist from time to time on an update or two to those blogs. You all have my blessing to take LMR and do with her whatever you want.

"Are you still remaking the LMR animation?" - Yes, I'm still actively seeking a musician to make an official LMR theme that will play in the background of it. It will be a glorious farewell to LMR.

"Is the heart-brand still a thing in Melodi?" - Absolutely, yes. The one incredibly major staple being carried over to Melodi is the heart brand. That symbol has become synonymous with LMR.

"What about the eye scars?" - Probably not. There will be facial scarring of some kind, yes, but considering the new story will not involve killing a cat (not yet anyway), she probably won't have the eye scars.

"Black eye with white pupil?" - We'll see! (It is a sign of Malice's corruption to have a black left eye, so almost certainly yes, but we'll see!)

"Ponies? Humans? Furries?" - I haven't fully decided. In my head, Melodi is a human, but I could also see her being a cat. I'm not sure what I wanna do just yet. However, she will not be a pony. She's gonna be far more human shaped. With boobies.

"Is this one gonna have porn?" - Nope! Not directly as part of the blog, no. Sexual encounters are going to happen in a very fade-to-black way, or a cropped-off-screen sort of way, yes. And there will be sexy characters, like monster girls or demon girls, and I'm sure people will find Melodi herself sexy, too. However, the blog is not going to contain actual porn. No full nudity. It will have what some would refer to as "fetish content," as with LMR, but it's not porn.

"Final question, so... LMR is just... dead? As of now?" - In terms of receiving updates from me, all that will be made is the LMR animation. But no, I certainly hope LMR is not dead. I would love to see the blog live on through other artists I've inspired. You all have my blessing to keep her alive forever.

Thank you all so much for your support.

More news involving Melodi and her twisted adventures coming soon.

I love you all, and I want you all to know how much your support of Lil Miss Rarity has changed my life.

I know it's cringe to type this, but, "I'm literally crying right now."

Mommy will always be pretty.

~Jay Tonique (Formerly Lil Miss Jay)

[yourlocalartsonist]

MONTHLY MFIP UPDATE✨✨

9/24 | Month 2 | Next Month | Month 1

Hey folks 🦐 I finally got the chance to make this month’s MFIP Update cuz god damn life was kicking my ass. College is fine for the most part tbh, just a lot of reading and writing cuz of the specific classes I chose. HOWEVER I have 💥FUCKING PMDD💥 so um skill issue on my part but it’s why I’ve been kinda exhausted as shit this week and was late with the update so my bad folks! (Also for more info on PMDD, click here! I don’t wanna spend this post yapping about it but wanted to leave a resource to spread awareness just in case :3). Also, Imma be tagging some of y'all who have been reading/supporting MFIP consistently just for this post, so yk you guys actually know these updates exist. I was gonna do that for the first ever update but as with many things, I forgor, so I'm doing it now! They’re supposed to come out on the 18th of every month, but yk sometimes life happens and I’m a lil late. It won’t be any earlier than the 18th tho so look out for these once it hits that date! Anywho, cheers to this month’s update!

Alrighty folks we be starting with the Art~!

Alrighty so obvious new thing, WE GOT RAPH’S REF SHEEEEEEEET TEEHEEEEEEE

BRO IM SO HYPE ABOUT IT! It turned out so genuinely amazing and I’m ridiculously proud of it! Especially cuz I honestly thought Raph was gonna be a harder design to figure out yk? I’m not used to drawing his body type, I wasn’t as familiar with his outfit, and even tho I’ve sketched him a few times before, I was just a bit nervous with Raph. Funfact, he’s also been the hardest to figure out how to write back when I was first starting MFIP. I genuinely don’t know why, but I got there eventually (I actually really love writing him now—) and same thing happened with his design!

Since MFIP’s taking place a few months after the Krang invasion, i’m able to take creative liberties and update the boys’ designs more! For some clarification btw, in my story’s lore, the invasion took place in September 2020, and MFIP starts on March 2021. Anywhizzle, my ideas for the boys’ designs is to combine their movie look with their show look, cuz while I do LOVE the black on them, it doesn’t feel right to me to not make them still unique in their own ways. These guys are all about authenticity, so why make their gear exactly the same, ya get me? I basically recolored his show gear to be black and red (and added a lil asymmetry on his legs) cuz I think it makes Raph feel older and more sure about himself, just feels right for him! I also just think the red fade on the black is hella cool! Fun lil color theory i think application, the black is more of a really dark, inky blue, so it makes the red pop out even more! I decided to make a bow out of his mask tails, too! I don’t wanna spoil the entire lore reasoning for it yet (it’ll pop up in the story), but I can indeed say it’s intentional that it looks a little like a lunamoth with damaged tails :3 I also took a BUNCH of creative liberties with his sais’ handles, since we haven’t really seen it much so like idk gaslight yourselves into thinking it’s always been this epic✨✨

Also I gave him his shorts back because FUCK YOU I LIKED THE RED TRIMMMM—

OH I ALMOST FORGOT yes he has longer eyelashes! I saw he grows to have really pretty eyelashes in the future cuz of his turtle species, and I wanted to lean into that by showing they’re starting to grow now :3

Bullshit Gag Because Yes‼️‼️

There ain’t shit to say about this, I just pulled a silly. I saw the fact Donnie was supposed to have a “Doctor Donatello” persona in the deleted episode where Dale turns into a werewolf. I’m really heavily on the train of Leo being the team medic and into medicine in general. I don’t think it makes sense for Donnie to be the medic judging by his sensory issues and this mf being as much of a germaphobe as my mom, and in my opinion it felt too stereotypical anyway to have Donnie be the medic. Ofc, to each their own, and this is just my interpretation of it, but I thought it’d be funny if Donnie still had this persona and was passionate about it, but was like horrifically bad at being a doctor. I made this dumbass sketch that I’ll finish sometime in the future (it’s gonna be a chapter in Arc 3 probably) and I just wanted to share it with yall~

THEY’RE HUMAN NOW⁉️

My ass wanted to show off cuz I’m sketching out some ideas of what my human designs for the boys culd be. I already did Leo’s like ages ago so he’s not on here but I’m realizing as I’m typing this my dumbass forgor to post it so um my bad I will do that in a few days—

But I wanted to design (or more accurately, redesign cuz I did draw em once a while back but I’m not satisfied with them) and I think I ate so far so uh yea. There isn’t any logic to sharing this, I just thought it was cool😭

And actually, imma share them here too just so y’all can see my boy ;w;

(A lil outdated cuz I didn’t give him lips at the time)

Okay there we go~

As you can see, I want all the boys to look kinda etherial and like they'd turn heads, and I think I am SUCCEEDING SO HARD SO FAR CUZ DAMNNNN THEY'RE ALL PRETTY AS SHIIIIIIIT TEEHEE✨ Also am tryna make sure they actually look Blasian since that's what the canon of my story says they are. I'll talk about them more another time when I have all of them on here~

But yea that's all for art this time folks :> ONTO THE NEXT THINGGG

Chapter Progress Time Whoop Whoooop‼️‼️

I didn’t make much progress on anything this month due to college—again, it’s fine, but there’s a shit ton of time management going on in my part to just manage everything and make sure I’m on track—BUT I am indeed still working on chapter 10. We’re up to 20 pages now which is only two more pages written from last month, but it’s kinda cool writing Donnie and I feel like I’m getting a better understanding of him! One thing I’ve been tryna do is understand autism better as a condition cuz I do wanna acknowledge and show bro’s autism instead of just ignoring it due to a lack of understanding. Donnie ain’t Donnie without it, ya know? I don’t know everything and tbh I would say I still have A LOT to learn on the subject matter, but I’m tryna expand my knowledge every opportunity I get and experimenting with how to better show it! This is to say tho, I’M NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, NOR AN EXPERT ON THE AUTISM SPECTRUM. This is what I’m finding and comprehending via my own research, and can tbh end up being wrong so please don’t quote me as a reliable source, I’m still learning ;v;

I remember one of the things I kept hearing about was autism leading people to struggle with empathy. The best way I heard it being described was someone bringing the example of when their friend was upset. That person can’t truly feel their friend’s emotions because they’re not the one experiencing it, so can’t properly understand how it’s making their friend feel. But they can see that their friend is communicating their sadness, and they still try to comfort them and make sure their friend knows they’re there for support. I understood it as bringing logic to emotions in a sense; collecting data and figuring out how to handle the situation based on the data rather than using intuition alone.

I’ve been using that to figure out how Donnie might handle more emotionally subtle situations, where he might try to rationally work through what’s happening and kinda substitute it in place of natural empathy. Like the little tidbit I gave above! Instead of just automatically being able to get vibes that the other person is upset, I felt maybe Donnie would instead notice the fact their tone is kinda different from before; it’s basically a data point. With that data point in mind, he could connect it to past experiences where a tone change could indicate a mood change, and as a result he might conclude that Salena’s tone change means she’s upset. I comprehend it as manually working through empathy rather than it being second nature, if that makes sense. Obviously and thankfully Donnie isn’t gonna spend the entire chapter playing a guessing game or anything with Salena’s emotions, it’s just one lil moment that I thought was cool challenge to myself with when writing him! I really love putting myself in the characters’ shoes when I’m writing them or their dialogue. I highly recommend it as a tool too, since it's helped me a lot with staying in character!

Last Lil Segment Y'all

Aight so, I wanted to try doing something cool if y'all are up for it. I really love rambling about my story and lore and characters blah blah blah, but I don't really know how to do so tbh. I'm not that familiar with how social medias work cuz I just never took it seriously, and I don't wanna just keep being like HEYYYYY ASK BOX IS OPENNNNN like I'm screaming from the top of the hill either. Sooooo insteaddddd

I think it'd be fun to do Q&As here! Or at least something similar. I'll open my ask box again and feel free to send any questions you want; it can be about the story, past lore, design questions, getting to know the characters, absolutely anything! Then when I'm gonna do my update for the month, I'll compile all y'all's asks, (prolly will have to tag to make sure you guys know I answered it, or if you ask anon then uh idk look out for the monthly update) and then answer them during the monthly update as the last section! I think it'll be a cool way to make this feel more interactive, and gives me an excuse to ramble. Don't be afraid to ask potentially spoilery questions either! If it's something I can't spoil yet or even give hints or vague answers about, I'll just say so in the update!

Anywhizzle, That's All Folks~!

I'm glad there was so much to talk about this month! I actually deadass thought it would be short but I should know better with my yapping' ass💀✨ But yeah, thanks for reading everyone! I hope y'all enjoy the rest of your days, and I shall see you next month~ Bye :D

Tageroonies:

@yosajaeofficial @chaoticspeedrun @ramblehour @randomcerealbrand @goldanrabbit @m1sf0rtun3 @foundthethief @ackalice @jellyfishheartsss @dollyrin @harukonene @iieieiw @mwantstossleep @zipzaizen @hypocriticaltypwriter @lordfreg @rainbowpr1sm @idioticsky @oleander-nin @cheeselord-official @skittlesqueen101

By the way, if you guys think you’d like to be tagged whenever an MFIP chapter is posted, lmk in a reblog or comment (no asks or dms plz, too inconvenient) and I’ll be sure to tag so it’s more reliable than tumblr notifs :3🫶

ROTTMNT: Moths Fly In Packs

[crescencestudio]

๋࣭⭑ Devlog 36 | 11.26.23 ๋࣭⭑

:rises from the dead: I'm.... BAAAAACK!!!!!!

Long time, no talk (kinda) everyone! I hope you've been happy, healthy, and well since we last saw each other and that the wind-down for the year is being kind to you all <3

We have a lot to catch up on, so let's do just that ^^ This is.... so long. I'm really sorry in advance tbh---I thought I hadn't done much because break, but there's quite a bit to show.

It's been a while since a formal update on the routes, so I'll start by telling you all where they officially stand. Before I do, it might be helpful to tell you all how I define percentage completion in my head. Basically, when I finish the draft of a route, I consider it 70% complete. This means I could ship it as is. I wouldn't be happy with the product, but it's playable and makes enough sense---just not the best quality.

When Wudgey finishes their edits, a route is 80%-85% complete, meaning I could ship it as is. I think it'd be pretty good actually and players would be happy. Beyond this point, I am just making fine tuning edits to incorporate more player interaction, polishing the flow of things, etc.

After that, there's basically only Elm and Vi's edits left. When Elm finishes, a route is 95% complete. Again, I think at this point, it's good. Like edits from this point onwards are purely for polishing purpose. After Vi, it's 98% complete. Then the last review comes back to Elm and I for it to be 100% complete. Right now, this is where the routes stand:

Kayn: 98% Complete

Fenir: 95% Complete

Druk: 80% Complete

Etza: 60% Complete (Still working on their draft!)

Do Not ask me about Kuna'a or Aisa LFMASOEIDJ

So most of the routes are actually looking pretty good! They're just getting bounced around to different editors at this point, but the changes made for most of them are basically small. Fenir and Kayn especially could be shipped as is in my eyes if I really wanted to.

Art recently has mostly been focused on commissions. Vui actually is almost done with ALL of the BGs for Alaris!! Isn't that crazy?? In about a year, he was able to create almost 25 BGs with daytime variations!!! He's a phenomenal artist, and I couldn't be happier to be working with him. It's also a bit bittersweet (and alarming??) to know that part of development is already close to ending! q.q

The most exciting art update I have is that we got the GUI assets finished and I've started coding them into the game!! AAAA!! These were the final updated assets I needed, and seeing the fully revamped demo come to life has been so.... Emotional HAHA! It's crazy to see how far Alaris has come from when I was first making it with my little fingies and throwing things together like paper mache. I'm incredibly in love with how all the assets look together, and I couldn't be more grateful for the artists who helped me update the assets!

Updated History Log. Please say you like the dividers between entries---I'm most proud of those

I'm still making my way through coding everything, but here's a couple screen previews so you all can see how things now look in the game!!

First off, is the Dialogue/Choice Screen. You can see that we have a brand new dialogue box (She's Stunning) and Choice Screen! I'm hoping to add some sfx for the choices when you hover over them, and sfx for the new UI in general so there's more user feedback when you click and hover on things. But for now, enjoy this preview of the new dialogue box, choice screen, and the new personality indicators!

Updated Dialogue/Choice Screen: You can't see it as well in GIF format, but the BG also has particles floating around, so there's a tiny bit of animation going on in some of the BGs as well!!

Next, we have the Free Time Screen. I actually posted this on Twitter recently but I don't think I posted it on Tumblr! ISN'T SHE STUNNING... ESPECIALLY WITH THE NEW BGS.... I'm especially happy with the text animations that show up at the bottom when you hover over the different choices! I was inspired by a couple other devs (specifically GUI god, @siyo-koy, and renpy animation master @just-a-carrot) to start incorporating animation style elements into my GUI. And I really like how it adds a little ~something~ to the feel of everything ^^

Updated Free Time Screen: begging someone to say they like the text animation so I feel validated for finangling with it

Finally, for our last preview, we have the Save Screen! While it looks new obviously with the new assets, I also did a lot of backend coding revamping for how it actually functions since my coding experience is a bit better now compared to when I was first fighting for my life figuring out save/load screens. The biggest change for you all is that there are now chapter markers so save slots will tell you what chapter that save file is from! And instead of screenshots, it's now a custom icon inside that shows the chapter card. I think it'll make the save screen look more cohesive now and hopefully more intuitive as well!!

Updated Save Screen: With a sprinkle of updated Chapter Card screen preview

That was long. Are any of us surprised, considering I had two months' worth of devlogs piled inside of me, begging to burst from the seams?

Anyways. Only two miscellaneous updates. One is that all soundtracks have been completed for Alaris! Peter finished the last of them recently, and they're all beautiful!!! For ppl who love piano soundtracks... :holds hand in piano lover solidarity:

Other update is that I finally fixed that godforsaken sprite bug that was associated with the energy vision feature from the demo!!! FINALLY!!! AFTER.... SO LONG. Extremely huge thanks to @robobarbie for taking time out of their day to do that; everyone please say thank you!!!!! OGs know how long that bug was bothering me!!!! Robo also gave me a pretty new rain code, so I'm showing you how both look in the new demo so you can appreciate them with me!!

Last miscellaneous update is more on a.... logistical development level?? Basically, now that I have new GUI assets to code, that means I can get a beta build of the routes currently written out. I was feeling really overwhelmed by that idea because most of this year has been focused on writing and making assets, not really coding. Knowing that I can Code and get Playable Builds out to people was stressful because I have to divvy up my time a bit more.

After an extremely insightful talk with beloved and admired Esh of @steamberrystudio I decided I'm probably going to be shifting how development goes from here on out. Instead of focusing head low on getting as many words written for the remaining routes everyday, I'm going to be making smaller but consistent progress and spend the rest of my time coding so that I can have more of a continuous cycle of production going on (e.g., writing a bit, making playable builds, gathering playtester feedback, etc. instead of doing each stage in blocked, sequential order).

I'm mainly telling you all this because it means writing updates will probably seem slower from this point on, but I think production overall will be more efficient because of it! This is also exciting news for playtesters and/or early access backers/patrons because it means you'll have playable content in the near future for content outside of just the demo :')

have u all heard of wudgeous of herotome. of course u have. they r all i talk about at this point

No market research because I've actually been addicted to BG3 LFMAOLSDJF. Actually, I'm taking some inspiration from it for the personality mechanic but eh.

On a more important note, @herotome demo is coming out December 2nd!!!! PLAY IT WITH ME. Wudgey is my editor, so you might think I'm biased but I'M NOT!!! I WAS A FAN OF HEROTOME BEFORE WUDGEY EVEN WORKED W ME!!! They have an exception eye for detail and player experience, and they are actually one of the devs that inspired me to even get into game development.

I just know the demo is going to blow everyone's socks off. OG Herotome prologue build fans know exactly what I'm talking about. Please mark December 2nd on your calendar---you will not regret it.

This was so unbelievably long, but I hope it's appreciated since there was no real devlog update for a hot minute. As always, Thank you all for your patience and continued support. With the year ending soon, I'm getting wrapped up in my feels in usual Crescence fashion. I am a Cancer so no one is surprised.

Next month will probably be more of an end-of-year devlog rather than the usual format. I know the devlogs of late have been all over the place, but once we get into the new year, it will be back to business as usual! Hope you all have a wonderful end to your year; I'll talk to you soon! <3

[meanbossart]

Some art-advice asks I've been meaning to reply to!

I use Clip Studio Paint Pro, though I'm not sure what tips I could give just in general. Just experiment with new things often, draw as much as your lifestyle allows, watch how other people do their work but try to avoid "Dont do THIS thing ever" type lessons and tutorials. Use as much reference as you'd like and take your time! To this day a simple sketch can still take me several hours to do depending on what it is.

Thank you so much!!! I didn't do any kind of formal art schooling but I've always been inclined towards arts and crafts, and started taking drawing semi seriously when I was about 17 (I'm 27 now). I draw a lot of inspiration from western comics and my favorite artists are jason shawn alexander and sean murphy.

Oh I'm so flattered to hear my stuff's inspired you to take up drawing again, I have a bunch of little crafty hobbies but art is by far the most fulfilling one to me - largely because you're constantly learning and improving.

You're definitely onto something already, I am constantly looking at other people's art (even If it isn't a style I would want to emulate) and analyzing how the pieces come together to create the final product. In my opinion this is pretty much the best way you can go about learning besides real-life reference drawing. You can even take something into your software of choice/print it out and trace it (just to yourself, of course) to get a sense of hand-motion and line use.

As a beginner I think there's no shame at all in taking heavy inspiration from your favorite artists, as long as you aren't straight up copying things and calling them your own. Your personal style Is likely to come out naturally, with time. That's very much how I started myself!

Also, just be patient with yourself, try to have realistic goals for your skill level while simultaneously being proud of everything you do. Even if you absolutely despise a drawing, you still drew something! And even if it doesn't feel that way you most definitely learned from it. Use learning tools and tutorials to whatever point you feel comfortable with but don't get stuck on people's arbitrary rules - unless we're talking about something tangible like real-life application of traditional art tools, things like anatomy, perspective and light are to be referenced from - but It's not the goal to emulate them 100% unless you ARE going for hyperrealism. As someone who uses a ton of reference these days, I can tell you first-hand that I often find myself straying from it on purpose to make a piece look more interesting.

Lastly, draw things you enjoy! Don't let anyone else dictate what you SHOULD be doing and don't fall into the trappings of wanting to stick to one specific style, process, or subject matter.

Good luck!!!

LOL thank you so much for your very evocative compliments! I haven't ever done a timelapse, not that I remember at least. I'm not sure how they work but I do so much of "I'm gonna try this thing 5 different ways and then decide what I like" that I'm not sure how comprehensive that would be LOL

I could put together a process showcase or something though, I feel like that might be better even, since I get to explain a little of what I'm doing through text and display how I use reference. Something to consider!

[insertsomthinawesome]

I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!! Okay so honestly I have been very very inconsistent over the years with just disappearing for periods of time due to various things 😂 So it probably seemed pretty normal to most people.

But it felt different on my side, so I'm excited to be back in business. I took a month long hiatus! 31 days of not drawing digital art. Its not something I talk about on here? But I've been suffering from some serious long term Art Burnout for.... a really really long time. Long enough that I should've taken a break probably years ago. It finally got so bad that I could barely draw. I was scared to do it (cause it always looked "bad" in my eyes [i'll come back to that]) and doing it was exhausting and disheartening.

I talked it over with somebody and realized that the fear and anger and frustration I felt towards my own artwork was uh. Not Normal or Healthy. And I finally committed to taking a real break for once.

I still drew a little bit by hand? Traditional art has always felt like it has lower stakes for me (i don't often share it online, and sometimes I don't even share it with friends) so I did some of that when I felt like it. But Digital art was completely off the table.

I had put such an immense pressure on myself to make my digital art perfect, to make as much of it as quickly as possible to satisfy something. It wasn't fun anymore. I'm proud of what i've made over the years! But for a long time now the stuff I've been making was made while hating every second of making it. With some rare exceptions.

I hated my art! It was a combination of Perfectionism, taking in too many external expectations, and the burnout. If you hate doing something its kinda hard to love it even when you want too lol. It wasn't "Bad" in the sense that the quality was low and it was ugly! It was "Bad" in the sense that it was unhealthy for me to keep doing it at that point in time.

I'm glad to report though, that with my hiatus officially over as of Wednesday last week: I am once again. In Love. With doing art, and being an artist :)

I put off taking a break for years cause I was scared that taking a break would mean that I would never achieve all the things I wanted to do with art. I was scared it was a stupid and lazy thing to do that would mean I'd never achieve my dreams. And Also even though I kinda hated drawing, I also loved making art. Its a weird duality that I can't even really explain??? I hated it but I also loved it. I wanted it but I also wanted to run from it. It wasn't until I was more mature and had more clarity and insight (and unfortunately also until the problems got worse) that I was finally able to let go of those fears and just do it.

And I'm really really glad I did. It was everything I needed. And I hope to strike a better balance in the future with art. Taking more breaks when I need them, or just when other things have my attention like reading or Video games (Some star rail got played during this time xD)

From the outside things probably aren't going to be that different?? At this point I don't really have any sure plans to post anything I've been drawing since my Hiatus ended. I might or I might not xD I'm still a hobbyist artist taking things at her own pace, but I hope that it shows how much happier I am :)

Whumptober 2023 is being officially put to rest by this post btw! I was in major burnout when that event started, and I'm ready to just, move on from all the past expectations I'd shoved on my shoulders. If I feel like filling any of the prompts or going back to any of the ideas I'd come up for it I will! But I'm not going to worry about doing it unless the desire sets in. Thanks to everybody who's been so kind to me throughout my time on here as an artist! Ya'lls tags and screaming and kind words, the fanfic, the asks and the responses? Its been fantastic :) You guys have made me laugh, smile, and cry tears of joy. I hope from here that things only get better and sweeter! And if I have bad days again, that's okay too.

Here's to 2024 and whatever it may bring ya'll :D 🎉🎉✨✨🧡💜

[meepispeepis]

The Storm Before the Calm

~Ok, I'm finally getting on that MK1 cringe! Got ALOT of inspiration from these lovely creators and their combined arts of "oops, Kung Lao's dead again" works. And the brainworm is demanding that I finally put this into writing so, here we are! Once again, huge shoutout to these lovely artists who gave me the inspiration and please do check them out!~

@helsensm // @novicedraws // @randyzorra // @d3rpydoods

~Before we continue just wanted to put some mild context to ensure this makes sense. This isn't part of some long-winded series, so you might as well think you've flipped open a book and started reading in the middle of the story. Fire God Liu Kang starts getting deja vu as certain coincidences and events start playing out that are too eerily similar to how things played out during the MK9 game (Raiden getting a message from his future self and trying to interpret in time what that message meant to save the future - long story short: nearly everyone died and no one came out alright :D). All roads were seemingly leading to Kung Lao dying in his timeline and Liu Kang struggled on how to cope and deal with this. On one hand, he did not want his friend-…His new teacher…To die, especially since he tried so hard to tailor make this timeline to ensure everyone got a happy ending.

Yet, at the same time, he refused to stoop down to Kronika's level and start altering the timeline until it was his "perfect" utopia. However, his fears and suspicion about the situation become even more realized when Raiden gets gravely injured and the only thing that prevented him from kneeling over was the thunder amulet infused with his person (and some other magical shit, idk). From this, Raiden gains his iconic white hair, and this gives Liu Kang a heart attack. To make a long story short, Kung Lao ends up dying at the hands of the villains (In this short story, it's assumed that Shang Tsung is wholly responsible or had a hand in his death), Raiden is going through the stages of grief, but he's going down the same dark path as the previous Raiden, now becoming Dark Raiden. And Liu Kang has to finally interfere.~

Still confused? Too late, now on to the story! Next // Wilted Cherry Blossoms, Dark Thunderstorms, Burning Hopes: Remastered Characters: Raiden, Kenshi, Johnny Cage, Liu Kang, Shang Tsung, Mentions Kung Lao, Raiden's Sister (named her Fuji :D)

Word Count - 6,094 Ships: Raiden/Kung Lao - Hints of Kenshi/Johnny Cage

Warnings: Canon Typical Violence (but with less blood), Character Death

It was over.

It was done.

They stopped Shang Tsung and his nefarious plot; it was over. This was the part where everyone patted each other on the back, did a whole hoopla about "the power of friendship saved the day," locked up the villain, and went home. But maybe that time was lost a long time ago. Ever since…

Ever since Kung Lao died.

Aside from Johnny, Kung Lao always knew how to lift everyone's spirits, that didn't involve excessive Hollywood references that most of them didn't get. His self-confidence and pride always seemed to ooze onto everyone else. If Lao says he can do it, then so can we! It hurt everyone when he was unceremoniously slain by General Shao and Shang Tsung, a clean cut to his neck with his own weapon. And you know, it wasn't until that day that Liu Kang was gravely reminded that these men never had to experience death in such a manner. Each of them knew how to fight, added to the additional training they got with the monks at the Wu Shi Academy. But Liu Kang never taught them how to kill, to maim, to perform the one act no ordinary person should ever have to do.

When Kung Lao died, it shocked everyone. The only one seemingly keeping themselves together was Kenshi. Coming from his Yakuza background, he has done plenty of dirty that he wasn't proud of. But Johnny? Liu Kang still remembers the reviving actor's disbelief, trying his damndest to do all he could for Kung Lao, even pleading with Liu Kang on what to do. But perhaps the one person who was hurt the most that day was Raiden. They were friends, childhood friends…lovers, even…Liu Kang can never scrub away the scene of Raiden being the first to notice his friend wasn't getting up (he was the closest to the body) and slowly descending to hold his boyfriend tightly. Raiden blocked out the world at that moment; the rest of the crew had to step in and finish the fight while Raiden grieved over his friend.

And things were never the same after that.

It was over.

It was done.

Kenshi and Johnny already shackled the unconscious Shang Tsung and started tending to their wounds. There was silence between them as they repaired themselves, barely making glances to the other. It wasn't until Kenshi spoke up, pointing out that Johnny was wrapping the bandage wrong and took the reigns in patching the star up. Johnny didn't put up a fuss. In a small way, he's kinda glad Kenshi said something. To break the silence and bring back that camaraderie they once had before. Feeling Kenshi touch him again, a wave of memories started flooding back to Johnny. The days when the 4 of them (Johnny, Kenshi, Kung Lao, Raiden) were always in each other's spaces. Arms thrown over each other's shoulders, whenever they were in a goofy mood; they were always leaning against the one nearest to them. That intimacy, he misses it.

"There," Kenshi softly says, completing the last patch on Johnny to ensure it wouldn't get infected.

Johnny couldn't help but return a sad smile and nod, "Thanks, Kenshi."

Then the silence began again as they both sat in silence, waiting for Raiden and Liu Kang to return once they were done with what Johnny called "the super laser beam like in that one Marvel™ movie." When they heard the sound of roiling thunder, that was their cue that the other pair had returned. Kenshi was the first to look up to see Raiden floating high above them, with black clouds shadowing him. It was a near-terrifying sight. His glowing eyes and hair, the crackles of lightning sparking off him, and the foreign look of godly contempt that was plastered on his face. Doesn't help too, that they each learned some time ago who Raiden was before Liu Kang altered the timeline. With this display of power, Raiden might as well be a god.

"Hey, Raiden, no need to worry! We had this one in the bag." Johnny gestures over to Shang Tsung, still enjoying his dirt nap. "He'll be going away for good once we figure out what our version of Arkham Asylum should be for the bastard."

Kenshi scoffs and shakes his head slightly, but it wasn't one out of annoyance. He knows what Johnny is trying to do, lightening the mood.

Raiden, however, does not reciprocate; remaining still as a statue in the air. Kenshi stares back at Raiden, anxious about what the thunder go-his friend, was thinking.

"…Hey, Raid-bro, we were told there was a chance of blue sunny skies when coming out here. Care to move the dark clouds out the way?" Johnny tries again with being jovial, but Kenshi can hear the hint of anxious tension in his tone.

After another long silence, Raiden finally descends, but where he was going was toward Shang Tsung. Johnny and Kenshi rise from their seated area as they closely watch Raiden slowly meeting the ground. By the time Raiden reached the surface, almost as if on cue, Shang Tsung started to stir awake, perhaps thanks to the constant thunder cracking in the area. Shang Tsung was already a beaten mess, with dried blood and dirt caked on his freckled face. His brown eyes meet with Raiden's glowing white eyes, and he has the gall to smirk at him. The prisoner readjusts himself, sitting straight up as he leaned against a tree.

"Love what you did with your hair, Raiden." Of fucking course, Shang had to go there.

Kenshi and Johnny both do their best to not flinch and cringe upon hearing that, knowing full well that it struck a nerve with Raiden, even if the farm boy wasn't showing it.

And as if Shang was further egg-ing Raiden on, he starts looking around, as if he's expecting someone to be here, but they happened to be missing. "Now, where is that pompous, hat-throwing circus act you often dragged along with you? Called in sick?"

"That's enough, Shang Tsung. Don't let us muffle you too." Johnny was the first to speak on everyone's behalf, his rising anger apparent as he growled.

Shang ignored Johnny, his eyes still trained on Raiden, meeting him eye-to-eye. "Oh~, don't beat yourself up for his departure, Raiden. You can rest easy that he died a prideful fool who didn't know when too much was enough."

"Hey, shut the fuck up!"

There was a one-sided back & forth, Shang Tsung constantly taunting the quiet Raiden while Johnny was trying to get Shang Tsung to stop talking. Eventually, Johnny starts grabbing the sorcerer by his ruffed-up shirt and tries intimidating him into keeping his mouth shut.

There are benefits to being half-blind and wearing a blindfold. Kenshi has been looking head, seemingly staring into nothing and nowhere, but the sight that Sento gave him allowed him to keep his peripherals on Raiden. Watching him closely to ensure that he doesn't do anything stupid. And Kenshi would be right to watch Raiden because the younger man started to approach the arguing pair.

Kenshi steps in front of Raiden, "Whatever you're thinking, don't."

"Get out of my way, Kenshi," Raiden's voice was like a coming storm, eager to wreak havoc on anyone and anything that stood in its way.

Kenshi had to choose his words wisely, one wrong move or phrase and he will erupt. They've seen it happen more than once. "Please, at least let us wait for Liu Kang before-"

"Ha! Still letting that proclaimed Fire God lead you around on a leash, Raiden?"

Kenshi now physically cringes before making a sharp turn toward Johnny, "Shut him up!" Kenshi can see sparks crackling of Raiden and he further obscures his view of Shang Tsung. "Raiden, he's trying to get into your head. Don't let him!"

"He knew, you know? Liu Kang? For someone who altered the timeline to fit his "perfect vision," a lot of strange coincidences have been happening as of late. I mean, I became a sorcerer when I was supposed to be a beggar. And you were a simple farm boy. But look at you now, a master of the storms and the skies," Shang Tsung side-eyes Raiden deviously, "He must've known that Kung Lao was going to die."

"Get out of my way!" the air starts to pick up, his hair and clothes ruffling in the wind, and more lightning static bounces off Raiden.

"Ok, time for your muzzle, dog," Johnny approaches with a mask-like device meant to silence individuals who wear it. As he tries to place the mask on Shang Tsung, the sorcerer hits him square in the dick (a technique he has learned to adopt later down the line thanks to the foolish actor), causing Johnny to have the wind knocked out of him as he backs away a couple steps. "N-not cool, man! Not cool!"

But this landed Shang Tsung a couple more minutes. "He could've prevented it, Raiden. Kung Lao may have died at the General's hands, but you know who truly caused his demise? Liu Kang could've stopped it all from happening. He went through all the effort to neuter you and me. Because of his biases over a timeline that no longer exists! He claims that he "doesn't interfere with affairs" because he wants us to become masters of our own fates, but we were never in control of it to begin with. Liu Kang decided for himself what we should be; all I did was defy his logic and plan."

"JOHNNY!" Kenshi shouts as he tries to hold Raiden back, the young man now struggling to get past the blind swordsman.

"I'm working on it!" Johnny replies as he hurries back to Shang Tsung with the mask.

"I SAID GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!" Raiden screams.

He can feel it. He can feel the amulet infused into his body responding to his anger, his grief, and his drive for vengeance. The condensed storms locked away in that amulet desire to give Raiden that release. Kenshi grunts as he starts feeling shocks ripple through him while holding tight onto Raiden.

"RAIDEN DON'T LISTEN TO HIM; YOU'RE BETTER THAN THIS!"

"Liu Kang could've saved your friend, Raiden. You know this as much as I do. He has the power to do so; he simply didn't use it. All under the idea of restraint. That's what makes you and I so powerful. We're not afraid to take the power we're given and use it to its nigh limits. The one who you should be angry at is the man who calls himself a friend to you."

Finally, Johnny wraps the mask around Shang Tsung, silencing him until it's eventually removed. But the damage was done. It wasn't until now that Johnny noticed that Liu Kang still hadn't arrived.

"Where's Liu? Kenshi, where's Liu!" Johnny says as he anxiously watches the struggle between Raiden and Kenshi.

Kenshi doesn't get a moment to entertain an answer as Raiden yells at the top of his lungs, a bust of electrifying energy emitting from him, from the amulet, knocking both Earthrealm warriors back a considerable distance. The pair lang roughly on the soil in an audible groan as they jerk and hiss at the shocking ripples still assaulting their bodies. Kenshi was the first to slightly recover, but it must've been some time before he regained his senses because when Kenshi frantically looked for where Raiden had gone, he saw the thunder wielder punching Shang Tsung to a bloody pulp.

"Raiden, ugh! Raiden, stop!" It hurts for Kenshi to get up, but he ushers all the strength he still has and rushes over to Raiden.

Kenshi rips Raiden off of Shang Tsung and doesn't bother to look the sorcerer over (that's what he gets for running his mouth), keeping his attention wholly on his friend (and his hand on the hilt of Sento).

"Raiden, we've been over this. Please, don-"

"GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!!"

Kenshi isn't given a moment to calm the man down as bolts of lightning come arcing towards the swordsman. Kenshi dodges out of the way, unsheathing Sento in the process; the line of shocking energy completely decimates a nearby tree. The time for words was over; now it's time to, in Johnny's words, bring out the "Hulk Buster."

Raiden raises his hand to the grey skies above, capturing lightning in his hand before hurling various sparks at Kenshi. The swordsman goes on the defensive, dodging and ducking behind cover, trying to avoid actively harming Raiden. But the more he placed distance between him and Raiden, the more Kenshi was bobbing and weaving past his thunderous attacks. Kenshi would be mildly saved as Johnny surprises Raiden by grabbing him from behind and trying to restrain him.

"Raiden, pull it together, man! We don't want to hurt you!" Johnny struggles to say, the shocks of lightning constantly snapping at him.

Kenshi rushes out of hiding and builds up momentum, hoping to get one good, non-lethal, strike in to knock Raiden out.

"Where the hell are you, Liu Kang..." Kenshi muttered to himself, slightly out of breath as he was exerting all his power into running and reaching Raiden as soon as possible. "Johnny! Hold him down, just a bit longer!"

"I'm-ACK, FUCK!" Johnny shouts as he feels another shock of electricity course through him, "I'M FUCKING TRYING!"

Raiden was howling like an animal, trying to shock Johnny off him. Lightning bolts were falling out of the sky as it struck the grounds around them, destroying everything it touched. It was almost like the lightning strikes were even chasing Kenshi as every bolt of lightning was always some inches away from hitting the swordsman.

He was close, almost there, just a bit more.

Raiden finally throws Johnny off him, elbowing him sharply in his face. Conjuring every bit of power of the storm, Raiden fried Johnny. The pained screams from the actor nearly shake Kenshi to his core.

"JOHNNY!!" Kenshi screams.

Raiden notices the swordsman approaching and disrupts his abuse of his friend to focus on Kenshi, redirecting the powerful blast and hurling it at the blind swordsman. Guided by Sento, Kenshi locks himself in a blocked battle with Raiden's powerful lightning attack, locked in a Harry Potter wand duel as Sento protects Kenshi from the attack. The mystical powers of Sento was able to withstand the ever-present assault, but Raiden was unhinged, not withholding the full potential of the thunder amulet. Then the impossible happens.

Sento cracks.

Kenshi quickly rolls out of the way and tries to get to safety before Raiden completely breaks Sento. But Raiden saw this coming, using his other hand to conjure a whip-like lightning bolt at Kenshi, lassoing him and dragging him to the ground, before giving the swordsman a devastating shock.

"Raiden!"

For once, the farm boy actually stops his assault. Leaving Kenshi and Johnny unconscious after constantly being shocked to near death. Raiden looked behind him, and there he was.

Liu Kang.

The Fire God stares at the scene in utter shock, eyes darting between the sizzling Johnny and equally as cooked Kenshi. Raiden, eyes & hair slowly dimming in brightness, keeps his eyes trained on Liu Kang.

'He could've prevented it, Raiden -��Liu Kang could've stopped it all from happening - Liu Kang could've saved your friend, Raiden. You know this as much as I do.'

Shang Tsung's words echo in Raiden's head.

"...Did you know he was going to die?" Raiden, for the first time, speaks coherently. Possessing the soft voice that he's known for.

"What? Raiden, what hap-"

"ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!" In that same instance, Raiden's voice booms like thunder (even the skies above respond, crackling thunder in the distance with his anger), his white hair and eyes glowing brightly. "YOU KNEW KUNG LAO WAS GOING TO DIE, DIDN'T YOU!!" Raiden points his electrifying finger at Liu Kang accusingly.

Liu Kang's mouth opens and shuts before he finally answers Raiden. "...Certain circumstances and events that transpired hinted that Kung Lao could die. But not once did I know for certain that Kung Lao would meet his untimely death."

There's a long, silent pause between the two; only the roaring wind breaks the stillness. Liu Kang dares to break his eyes away from Raiden, looking for the one Kenshi and Johnny were supposed to contain, Shang Tsung. It looked like in the scuffle, he used that opportunity to get away, his hairpin lying on the ground dirtied with blood and dirt. Whatever Shang Tsung said to Raiden, it riled the former thunder god. Liu Kang kicks himself for being unconscious for so long. The device he and Raiden went to disable knocked the wind out of him and rendered Liu Kang out of commission for a moment. When he awakened on the vacant platform the device was on, Raiden was gone.

Liu Kang looks back at Raiden, the man's head now facing the ground, fists balled. The next thing that comes out of Raiden's mouth breaks the Fire Gods' heart.

"Why did you let him die," his voice cracks, and Liu can hear the tears Raiden shed.

"Raiden...I..."

"Even if you didn't know fully that Kung Lao would die, why didn't you tell us! Why didn't you save him? Or let us help you save him!" Raiden sobs, his knees feeling weak.

"...I did all I could, Raiden. I tried to protect him...But I couldn't shelter him. I had to trust that Kung Lao would make the choices necessary to follow his own path. I wasn't going to take that choice from him."

"How would he know what path to take if YOU NEVER TELL HIM WHERE IT WILL LEAD HIM!!!" Another sound of roiling thunder, lighting sparking off Raiden as he snaps his head toward Liu Kang. "You could've told him, us, what could've happened! You could've stopped this!"

"I did not want to burden you with the knowledge I knew and felt!" Liu Kang raises his voice, not to match his anger, but because the winds were picking up and the thunder was practically deafening him. "I didn't want you or him to spend every waking moment; questioning each move you took, each decision you made! I wanted both of you to become masters of your own fate!"

'He claims that he "doesn't interfere with affairs" because he wants us to become masters of our own fates, but we were never in control of it to begin with. Liu Kang decided for himself what we should be.'

"No...NO!!" Raiden shouts as he slings a lightning bolt at Liu Kang. A shot the Fire God effortlessly dodges.

"Raiden, please!"

"YOU CREATED THIS TIMELINE. THIS NEW UNIVERSE! YOU COULD'VE PREVENTED THIS! YOU HAVE THE POWER TO, I KNOW YOU DO!"

Another reckless throw of a lightning bolt, scorching a nearby tree as Liu Kang steps out of the line of fire. "Raiden, please, you have to understa-"

"I LOVED HIM, LIU KANG! WITH ALL MY HEART, I LOVED HIM!!! AND YOU TOOK HIM FROM ME! YOU DID THIS TO ME!!"

Raiden rips open his shirt, revealing the amulet fused with his person, a permanent reminder of the trauma everyone endured...That he endured...

"BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK TO ME!" Raiden's feet crackle with electrifying power as he lunges towards him, performing a move Liu Kang knows far too well as Raiden flies at him like a speeding torpedo, locking Liu Kang as they both collide into various trees.

Liu Kang grunts as their movement is halted by a large rock, but he's not given a moment of reprieve as Raiden starts socking him in the face multiple times. Screaming phrases that Liu Kang could not focus enough to bear their meaning. He's then thrown about in a large circle, and when Raiden releases his grip, Liu Kang goes flying again.

Liu Kang crash lands into a nearby lake. It takes him some time to gather his strength to swim out of the waters. He coughs and spits out blood, Raiden isn't holding back, the powers of the amulet having provided him with strength and vigor. But he was still mortal. Liu Kang can take a beating, but one wrong move and a bit of force; and Liu could kill Raiden. Liu Kang assesses his surroundings, mainly looking for where Raiden has gone or where Raiden could potentially come from.

Fortunately, Raiden's rageful cries gave him away as he came crashing down like a speeding bullet from the sky toward Liu Kang. Hoping to catch him in a flying kick maneuver. Liu Kang was able to block the attack, the force of the kick skidding them both further from the lake that Kang emerged from. There is a back-and-forth between the skilled fighters as each attack is swiftly blocked by the other. Well, more like Liu Kang was the one being swift. Raiden was filled with hatred and rage, his attacks were more akin to a wild animal attacking and defending itself.

Liu Kang had to hold back. Unlike Kenshi, who somewhat matched his power level, one wrong flaming fist and Raiden could be K.O-ed to his grave.

"Raiden, I am not your enemy. Everything I did for Kung Lao, I've always had you in mind! Whatever Shang Tsung told you-"

"Oh yeah, go ahead!" Raiden opened his palms and bent his fingers, colliding his hands on each opposite side of Liu Kang's head, sending shocks of electricity to his head and disorienting the Fire God as his ears started to ring. "Blame it all on Shang Tsung! Blame every single problem and inconvenience on the fucking sorcerer! Because gods forbid you take any responsibility for yourself and own up to the fuck up THAT YOU MADE!"

Raiden grabs Liu Kang in a crushing hug and sends both of them flying in the sky, high enough for Raiden to send a highly concentrated bolt of lighting onto Liu Kang; Raiden being able to withstand such powerful energies. Liu Kang screams in anguish as he's tased ten times over, and then thrown back to the earth below. Liu Kang leaves a crater where he landed and for a moment, doesn't move from his spot.

It took every fiber of his being and willpower to slowly get himself back on his feet. Liu Kang didn't even have to look to know that Raiden was behind him. Between gasps, coughs, and hacking up blood, Liu Kang tries to plead with Raiden.

"...Raiden...I don't want to hurt you...I know you're...Grieving. He meant everything to you as you did to him...But Kung Lao wouldn't want us to fight. Not like this..."

There was a long pause, yet again.

"Don't you dare tell me what Kung Lao would've wanted. You don't get to speak for him or anyone, like you always do!"

"Raiden-"

"You think you know what Kung Lao would've wanted when you knew nothing about him. Not like I did. Do you want to know what Kung Lao would've wanted? You want to hear it from someone WHO ACTUALLY FUCKING KNOWS HIM!?! Let me tell you!"

Raiden forcefully turns Liu Kang to face him before clocking him in the face.

"Kung Lao would've wanted to know how he was going to die so that he could prevent it!"

Another crack.

"He would've thanked you for trusting him with this knowledge so that he could come back home with me in peace!"

Another crack, blood staining his knuckles.

"HE WOULD'VE WANTED TO LIVE WITH ME. SPEND THE REST OF HIS LIFE WITH ME! HIS FUCKING BOYFRIEND!"

Another crack after Liu Kang weakly tries to block his other fist attack.

"HE WOULD'VE WANTED TO DIE PEACEFULLY. WITH ME BY HIS SIDE! NOT IN A FUCKING REALM THAT HE DOESN'T BELONG TO, FACING DOWN A HORNED-FACED FUCKER AND THAT DAMNABLE SORCERER! TO ONLY DIE BECAUSE THEY USED HIS WEAPON AGAINST HIM! LEAVING HIM TO BLEED ON THE DIRT!"

Another crack, an uppercut that sends Liu Kang stumbling back some feet.

Liu Kang spits out another glob of blood mixed with saliva. "We all can't choose how we die, Raiden."

"Yet, you chose for him to die there."

Something within Liu Kang snaps, anger was boiling. "Kung Lao chose to not listen to me when I asked him to not interfere, Raiden!" Liu Kang tries to hold back the poison he truly wanted to emit.

One too many times has he heard this. How Liu Kang was the reason Tarkat exists. How it's his fault that Kitana and Mileena's mother was dead. How it was his fault that Shang Tsung and Quan Chi were in deplorable working and living conditions. How it's his fault that Reptile and Smoke lost their loved ones. How it's his fault that events and circumstances that did not go in their favor, even if it was out of everyone's hands, was HIS FAULT.

He was tired of it. Tired of explaining his reason for not keeping the position as the Keeper of Time. Tired of defending himself against the actions and motives that others have. Tired of expressing how while he may have remade this timeline and altered events, he never once had it planned to control the lives of mortals; leaving their motives and fates in their own hands and suffering the consequences of doing so.

Red and blue flames start to erupt from his arms where his draconic tattoos were printed, his eyes giving off a godly glow.

"I already told you why I withheld that information from him. I wanted him to have peace. Both of you, to have peace." Liu Kang tries his best to keep his calmly attitude as he picks himself up.

"And how do you know he wouldn't be at peace if he at least knew what was coming!?!" Raiden spits back at him

"And how would you?"

Even with his soothing voice, he definitely struck a cord with Raiden as he goes for a swing at Liu Kang. This time, Liu Kang grabs his fist and twists it, not enough to break the bone, but to cause painful strain.

Raiden shouted in mild pain as he tried to swing his other free hand at Liu Kang. Similarly, Liu blocks the attack, grabbing his wrist and unintentionally burning him slightly.

"Raiden, I'm not going to say this again. Stop this." Liu Kang looks Raiden dead in the eyes. Despite his calm face, there was a silent roaring flame behind his features. The kind of look that screams "I don't want to hurt you, but I will if you give me reason to."

Yet, Raiden did not listen. He headbutts Liu Kang successfully, forcing Liu Kang back with a bleeding nose. That was the straw that broke the camel's back. In a fit of rage, Liu Kang yells as he punches Raiden square in the face. He didn't use his full godly strength, but it sent Raiden flying through multiple trees before slamming against one tree trunk. Liu Kang huffs and puffs, the anger slowly dying down and the realization of what he did quickly coming to him.

"Raiden!" Liu cries as he rushes as fast as he can to the former thunder god.

When he found his body, Liu Kang feared the worst. It happened as the old Raiden said. They were always destined to fight, to kill each other, and Liu Kang couldn't avoid it in this timeline. But the moment he heard Raiden's labored breaths, Liu Kang felt an overwhelming relief wash over him.

"Raiden! Raiden, I'm so sorry! I didn't- I didn't mean to," Liu Kang was stumbling over his words as he held Raiden upright, unsure of how serious his wounds were.

Raiden was going through the shock of it, breathing not only labored but in quick succession. Liu Kang tried to help Raiden match his breathing, to calm him down from the pain and shock.

"Are you," Raiden swallows between shaking breaths and stuttering speech, "Are you going to l-let me die? Like you did Lao?"

Liu Kang meets Raiden eye to eye. Raiden was bleeding from his head, streams of red running down his face with twigs and sticks entangled in his white hair. He's never going to let this go. Whatever Shang Tsung told him, it infected him like a parasite. As long as Raiden lived and breathed, Kung Lao's death will always be Liu's fault.

...Unless...

Liu Kang huffs, he never thought he would have to do this again, not since Shujinko. Liu Kang positions Raiden as comfortably as possible as one would be leaning against a tree with multiple broken bones and aching muscles.

"No, I want to grant you peace. I know that you don't want to hear this...But Kung Lao would've wanted you to find peace with his departure."

Liu Kang starts building up flames that run up his arms, performing the many monastic dances he learned from the previous timeline and the current. As the flames roared, they soon floated to Raiden and encompassed him. They never burned him. Raiden tries to crawl away from the dancing flames, believing them to char him to a crisp.

"Kung Lao would've wanted you to look fondly on your friendship and love, and seek to replicate that love with others. He would've wanted you to live happily, even if he wasn't there to provide you with that happiness."

"L-Liu Kang, what are you-wait...No!" Raiden's eyes start to water as he can feel his memories slipping. Not just the ones with Kung Lao, but everything before Liu Kang found him. His previous adventures in Outworld, in the Netherealm, in Chaosrealm, his ventures with his closest friends...The first time Kung Lao told him the three words, "I love you." Everything. "Liu Kang, no! Don't, please don't!"

Liu Kang, almost coldly, ignores Raiden's pleas as he takes it all away. Reverting Raiden back to the simple farm boy from Fengjian who simply wanted to protect and guide his village.

"...You are right, Raiden," Liu Kang says between paused breaths, trying to hold back tears as he committed the deed. "It is my fault. I shouldn't have thought that I could groom you or Kung Lao to become protectors of Earthrealm like you were before. I shouldn't have taken you away from your family, your friends, and your home in hopes of raising you to become grand warriors. I have placed your loved ones and you in so much danger...All because I clung onto a life that no longer exists...I'm sorry."

With that said, Raiden passes out from his injuries as Liu Kang finished the last of the memory wipe. Liu Kang stares at Raiden's slumbering body, and he can't help but scream and cry.

Finally allowing himself to grieve ever since that fateful day.

-

Fuji finished up the last of the clothes just in time when dinner was ready. She was having a hot pot this night, filled with various greens, potatoes, sweet potatoes, corn, radishes, and various mushrooms. All placed into a chicken broth seasoned further with a tomato and pork bone soup base. Fuji sits at the table with a bowl full of the soup and she does her best to not look across the table...Where her brother Raiden would be...

Raiden told her a long time ago that he was placed in a very powerful position and hard at work with Mr. Kang. He brings back money and unique souvenirs with questionable origins. And he always makes sure to visit her occasionally when he's coming back to Fengjian.

But this was one of the many occasions where the house felt too big, even with their elderly mother and father sleeping in the other room. She missed having her older brother around, for the longest time, he was her only friend. Her closest friend. I mean, sure, they were siblings, and they had their "sibling moments," but with him gone, she never felt more alone. But her being alone wasn't the main problem for Fuji, it was Raiden's sudden silence.

Ever since Kung Lao's passing, Raiden hasn't been returning her calls, answering her letters, or even visiting the family. Doesn't help, too, that none of his friends live in Fengjian, and aside from Kung Lao and Johnny's number (she's never calling that man, btw), she can't even reach them to know what's up with her brother. It's gotten to the point where she has saved up some money to take a week's vacation to the U.S. where her brother is currently working (or so Raiden told her).

Before Fuji knew it, she was already done with her bowl (2 bowls actually) and she saved the leftovers for her parents when they awaken. As she was washing up the dishes, she hears a knock at the door. Hmm? Who could be visiting her at this hour?

…Could it be!

"Give me a moment!" Fuji says hurriedly as she dries her hands; making her way to the front door. A tiny bit of hope fills the young woman. Could this be Raiden? After so long!

She swings open the door, hope and glee plastered on her face, but it quickly turns to confusion and worry. "…Liu Kang…Raiden!?!"

Outside was Liu Kang carrying a bandaged and mostly healed Raiden. "I'm sorry to come at such a late hour, Fuji. May I come in."

"What happened to my brother!?! Did someone mug him? Was he attacked?" Fuji ushers Liu Kang to enter the home and shows him to Raiden's old room, still possessing his old belongings even before he left.

Despite her questions, Liu Kang did not answer her. She asks again and again about her brother's condition, who did this to him, and why, but she is met with silence. She watches Liu Kang gently place Raiden on his old bed, and just as he came unexpectedly, Liu proceeded to walk back outside.

"W-wait! Liu Kang, please, tell me what happened! Who hurt my brother! Why did this happen-" Fuji tries to stop Liu Kang by grabbing at his wrist, but she saw something that shocked him.

Liu Kang's eyes were red as if he was crying not too long ago.

"…What happened…"

There's a long pause between them. All that Liu Kang does is slightly tilt his head toward her, his white eyes meeting hers, before saying, "I'm sorry, Fuji. Your brother has been relieved from his service…And this will be the last time we will see each other."

And just like that, Liu Kang left. Fuji watched Liu Kang leave, fading away in the horizon, with more questions than answers.

"Ugh…My head."

Fuji nearly scares herself when she hears Raiden in the other room and moving about. She rushes back to him and helps support her brother when she sees that he is still unsteady.

"Raiden! Liu Kang, your boss from the States dropped you off, and you're bandaged, and unconscious, and Liu wouldn't tell me why you were like this and-"

"whoa, whoa, Fuji, slow down! Start over, who's Liu Kang again?"

Fuji pauses. "…Liu Kang…Your boss…"

"Fuji, I have no idea who that man is," Raiden hisses in pain as his muscles start to ache again. It's only now that he realizes that he was bandaged badly. "Did he do this?"

"I-I don't know. I thought…I thought you would tell me…"

"Well, I don't know who I angered to get this treatment, but if this Liu Kang fellow helped me back home, I'm surely appreciative. I'll have to lay back down. Can you get me a hot towel, please?"

Fuji helped her brother back to bed and gave him his requested towel, but she found herself staying in his room for the entire night as if she were a child again. She couldn't sleep as she was plagued with questions about what happened to Raiden. Better yet, the line of work that he was in that he got this terrible treatment. And unfortunately, she might never get those answers again. Raiden doesn't remember anything in the past couple of years, even seemingly forgotten about Kung Lao's death and funeral. His memories were missing and he couldn't give a reliable answer to what happened in his life past the day that he went into Madam Bo's restaurant after a bet with Kung Lao.

Even worse, she can't ask Liu Kang. Because just as he promised and foretold, they never saw Liu Kang again. - ~Holy shit this was longer than I anticipated. Also, I do not like Liu Kang's memories loss powers, but will I use it for the sake of angst? You fucking know I will bby! This is my pseudo-first fan work for an official fandom and I hope everyone liked it. Once again, a lot of this was inspired thanks to the lovely artists who contributed to the "oops, Kung Lao dies again" AU and I want to thank them for jumpstarting this silly little AU in this silly little game about beheading people with your bare hands. Sorry if there were some grammatical and spelling errors, was working on this throughout the evening and past midnight (quite literally 4:26 where I'm at lmao). I might make a sequel to this because I'm getting ideas of Kung Lao returning, but not as he used to be (Revenants in MK1, ayo?)~ UPDATE! I have now officially made a writer's blog so that this doesn't get lost in my clustered main blog! Any future installments about this and other writing pieces will go to this blog! @420thewritersroom

[illumiera]

Hello there! For the firsts ask: 4, 15, W, Z, 🌍 and ‼️

oh, thank you so much for the ask, Senu!! 💖

✨ ask game! ✨

4. first time experiencing grief

Elentari's from a small family—no uncles, no aunts, and as I headcanon that Bretons live a good while thanks to their mer blood, her grandparents had already passed on by the time her parents got around to having her (or did so when she was very young). that means her first time experiencing grief was, unfortunately, when her mother, father, and little sister were killed by the Dark Brotherhood, and while Mara could save her thanks to the divine in her (in other words: that dragon soul!), her family's mortal bodies could never have withstood the touch of a god. she misses them so, so very much. (and blames herself for their deaths, too.) 🥲

15. first thing they remember feeling proud of

for Elentari, this must have been something magic-related! though it was considered "improper" for highborn girls in Daggerfall's restrictive noble circles to learn the arcane arts, her mother insisted upon teaching her and her father encouraged her. I think it was a very proud day for a young Ellie, the moment she tried and tried and finally cast a spell and did it well, and after that, she began dreaming of becoming a great mage or a travelling healer.

W. first time they realised their relationship is endgame... or isn't

I can't help but think that Elentari and Miraak have always had the sense that their fates are intertwined, whether it's to be with one another or to be the death of one another. how much they (well, Ellie, really, considering she's the one so deep in denial they could find evidence of her in Ancient Egypt) are prepared to acknowledge that, though, is another question entirely! destiny aside, they'll realise that their relationship is endgame through the little things: how they can feel safe with one another and seen with one another, how they can laugh and cry and learn together, through late-night cuddles as they talk each other out of nightmares, and through winged flights with the wind in their hair. for two Dragonborn who have always felt like strangers walking on Nirn, at home with neither mortals nor dragons, this is one of the most precious things of all.

Z. first time they said "I love you"

while they're both very loving when it comes to words and actions, both Ellie and Miraak are usually the sort of people who let their I love yous go implied and so unspoken it's downright obvious in all the things they do and say. that said, should there come a moment where they're both ready to become a couple, and to accept that through time and destiny and life and death, they've chosen one another again and again? that's where we'll find them saying "I love you." 🤲 (oh, and perhaps their fic's title counts as an I love you, too? because I'm a sucker for when stories find a way to include their titles in prose or dialogue, and so i fear no fate (for you are my fate) will most certainly be spoken aloud At Some Point!) 😼

🌍. first attempt at worldbuilding, or a notable piece of worldbuilding you're proud of

ah, I love worldbuilding, and it almost certainly shows at least a little in my writing! probably one of my favourite pieces of worldbuilding (and some of the first I came up with, now that I think about it) is the lore I have for the dragon cult and Atmora. canon doesn't tell us much about it, which more or less gives me free rein to invent personalities for the dragon priests, make up some rules Miraak would have lived under, and think of what life would have been like back then... which Ellie gets to see, too, both through Miraak's recollections and through dreams that take her through time!

‼️free space! tell us about a notable "first" in your writing journey!

here's a first! I'm a shy sort of creature, so while TES isn't the first fandom I've written for, it is the first fandom in which I've worked up the courage to involve myself as anything more than a lurky lurker from Planet Lurk. it's been so fun, getting to know/scream with/ramble with talented friends and mutuals and bouncing braincells/ideas/jokes back and forth, rather than just... "I have finished a chapter. lo, it has been released into the wild. the proverbial crickets are chirping a lovely song tonight, aren't they?"

[likesdoodling]

It has been a while since I started digital art,

Quite a while.

So here is a 'progress over the last two years' since I gained access to a drawing tablet.

:D

This is my first ever digitally illustrated piece- compared to my latest one-

So, a little bit different.

I do think my art took quite a jump around June 2022, when I took a break from my Steve comic strip, (for obvious reasons- it was about Technoblade's polar bear so...) and decided to try practicing gesture drawing to see if it helped my general anatomy knowledge. This is before,

And this next one is after.

The most obvious change here is that I switched to using thinner lines. There is a gap of about two months between these.

This was when I realised that you could improve art by practicing it (mind-blowing I know), and then started to do just that. Some other notable jumps forward would be when I discovered the airbrush-

Well, discovered a new method of shading with it anyway.

Then after that I had a few pictures that I actually still like, despite them being pretty old at this point, the one below is actually from September of 2022-

I mean, the hands are a bit iffy, but the rest looks alright. This was when I was going through a bit of a melanie martinez phase-

This next one was from January of 2023, I'd only just gotten into bungou stray dogs via some random memes on pinterest about this weird brown haired guy who had lots of bandages and who had this running gag with wanting to die- I actually looked him up at one point, but that didn't really explain much. The main one that I remember was 'life is short, so make it shorter, shorter than chuuya~'

Which at the time was just kind of confusing,

Then I watched the show and it made perfect sense.

I'd discovered ascendance of a bookworm in like, 2021, but I hadn't really been doing fanart of it since I was mainly doing dsmp related stuff and I kind of assumed nobody would know what on earth I was referencing. Turns out tumblr has a lot more bookworm fans than I orignally anticipated. Instagram still has no clue. I think maybe one person out of my followers on instagram knows what I'm on about-

Then we've got these two which I am still proud of btw-

The first one is from a dystopian/time travel fanfic called viridian.

The second one was after I learned about rim lighting. It was inspired by a song actually, 'crash' by noevaii. (and yes I found that song from a sad-ist animatic, it was cool) The character isn't anyone in particular. They're both from February 2023.

Then there's probably my most liked picture on instagram, (not tumblr, since tumblr knows about bsd and bookworm, but y'know. This was even sadder than I originally intended since the last half of my comic strip was finished AFTER everything happened)

Then the final conclusion of my Steve comic strip in May of 2023.

I don't think my art really changed much in between those, but eh.

Then I switched to doing a bunch of ascendance of a bookworm stuff to see what would happen and turns out there are way more fellow fans out there than I anticipated-

Then I guess my next breakthrough in tumblr popularity, (even if it might not have been a breakthrough in art skills necessarily) was when things went DOWN in the bsd fandom with chapter 109 and I did probably one of my most liked tumblr posts I have ever done-

If you want to see the rest of that, feel free to scroll down on my tumblr page, the original's like eight pages long-

This was before anyone knew what was going to happen btw.

I still think it's hilarious that I put in chuuya having contacts. My reasoning being, they're on a film set,

It was a pretty interesting exercise in shading in monochrome.

Then I started a 30 day art challenge in October that I didn't get past day six of, but it was still pretty fun. This is the best one of those-

After that I spent most of my time studying for the jlpt n5, so I didn't really do that much art related stuff,

This is one of the two non-commission related pictures that I finished over the two months after I kind of gave up on the art challenge. This one's from November,

Then I finally finished an art commission I'd been working on for the three months prior, as well as studying. Here is an example of the type of pictures I was doing for that,

Then I was occupied with christmas and birthday presents for my siblings, both my little sisters are into ascendance of a bookworm- (completely my fault I am proud to say) so I was able to do stuff related to that, here's a couple of snippets, but you guys don't get the colour version hehe

And one of them has also read the entire fma manga just like I have so-

Anyway, it's been quite a progression since I resolved to master digital art in 2021.

I reckon I've come a fair way since then. I mean. My art skills in general are way better than they used to be. The last two or three years have been pretty interesting.

Also-

Just had to include this one, I'm gonna do a more detailed version but still-

I think it's funny so I'm posting it here. Even if it's not really related to art progression-

[otakween]

Digimon Adventure 02 Best Partner Series - Part 2

Lol why are the girls' butts so emphasized in this artwork. Seems sketchy, but okay (Tailmon's even pointing to Hikari's butt, as a YouTube commenter pointed out).

Questionable art aside, I definitely thought these 6 CDs were a little weaker than the ones in my first post, but I'm biased. I don't have a very strong connection with a lot of the 02 characters, so it makes sense that their songs wouldn't hit as hard for me. On the other hand, I really like Ken and Wormmon so their album slapped. Anyways, full thoughts below.

Daisuke & Veemon

Google Boy - Daisuke (Listen here - subbed)

Daisuke singing about being a hot blooded shounen boy and how his goggles are a mark of his coolness and Taichi's legacy. A very Daisuke song lol.

Pretty funny how goggles just became a signature fashion statement for Digimon MCs. At least they kinda had a purpose in Tamers (although it wasn't explained very well).

Go Ahead! - Veemon (Listen here & Translation here)

Veemon's song is very in-sync with Daisuke. Just talking about having courage and rushing into battle without thought (because your squad will back you up and everything will work out! LEEEEROYYYY JENKINSSSSS)

2-Top - Daisuke & Veemon duet (Listen here & Translation here)

Okay, this was definitely the strongest song on this CD. It's catchy, the boys sound great together and the whole thing's a soccer metaphor which is very on brand. (I tried to google and see if "2-Top" is soccer terminology and came up with nothing tho -shrug-)

I like the little banter breaks in this and then in the song they talk about how their bickering just shows how energetic they are haha.

They mention being a digimon tamer in this song but did they even use that terminology in 02? I don't remember...

Miyako & Hawkmon

Crash with Bingo - Miyako (Listen here - subbed)

The lyrics of this song are pretty nonsensical, but I get what vibe they were going for. She's basically singing about being a hot mess but being proud to be herself. Also mentions that she's not just here to look cute.

I feel pretty neutral about Miyako, but I did appreciate that she could be kinda tactless and brash at times. Traditional Japanese femininity usually means being quiet, submissive and agreeable, which she definitely is not.

Although I've never liked the "bingo" catchphrase, it's fun in a song lol

Knight of Love - Hawkmon (Listen here - subbed)

Man, out of all the digimon partners, Hawkmon's gotta be the biggest nothing burger of them all. I couldn't tell you a single thing about the dude. I feel like the bird digimon are the most sidelined for some reason? (Maybe they're like "little boys don't care about birds, they like dinosaurs and bugs!")

Hawkmon sings about being a "knight of love," but I never got "knight" vibes from him really. I guess he kinda talks like a knight, but nothing in his design says knight...he's supposed to look like an Indigenous person, no? Maybe I'm being to literal hahaha

Fly High - Miyako & Hawkmon duet (Listen here - subbed)

Yeah, I don't really buy Miyako and Hawkmon's partner chemistry. They sounds more like coworkers lol. I did like the part where Miyako was asking to talk to all of Hawkmon's digivolutions in quick succession, that was fun.

Miyako's just spiraling the whole song and Hawkmon's trying to comfort her but she seems to be kinda brushing him off for most of it haha

Iori & Armadimon

My Conclusion - Iori (Listen here - subbed)

This song was...not good. Not the worst of the bunch, but it kinda just felt like it had no melody and Iori was talk-singing the whole time. His voice is cute and the lyrics fit his character nicely, but I was thrown off by how janky the song itself sounds.

The song is about Iori's convictions and what evil vs. justice means to him. You can sense that his philosophy is coming from his kendo practice.

I enjoyed the gratuitous English in the final line lol

Omyaa to Let's Go! - Armadimon (Listen here - subbed)

This one had a good energy and I liked the "Let's go!" chorus, but there was still a lot of talk-singing going on

I hate that the song starts by mentioning that damn Chuu x2 Jelly...it's like the show forgot to give Armadimon any memorable qualities so when they wrote this song they were like "he liked jelly...I guess?"

Armadimon losing steam and kinda flubbing the lyrics was the best part of the song lol

A Message to the Future - Iori & Armadimon duet (Listen here - subbed)

Phew, finally a good one. I was a bit worried I'd dislike this whole album. I really liked the melancholy yet optimistic vibe this one had. It kinda feels like any two characters could have sung this, but oh well. It was a nice duet regardless.

Armadimon telling Iori that "no matter what kind of adult you become, you'll always be Iori" was sweet :)

Takeru & Patamon

Focus - Takeru (Listen here - subbed)

Okay this one made me MAD because it was so ship-baity!! What the heckk??? This song is clearly implying that Takeru has romantic feelings for Hikari ("Am I the focus of your heart?"), but the show led me to believe that his feelings were platonic and almost brotherly. Did I watch the same show as the song writer? I don't mind them as a pairing, but I feel like this is contradicting my interpretation of the anime so I'm just confused.

Aside from my grumblings, I think this song was great for the drama of it all lol. I also liked the callbacks to Hikari and Takeru growing up together and Hikari blossoming into a powerful young hero.

The comment section of the YouTube video I've linked have people arguing whether the song is about Hikari or Patamon lol. Ain't no way this song is about Patamon. There's even a hikari pun in there.

Don't Stop Patapata - Patamon (Listen here - subbed)

Not sure if this is cute...or just annoying. Sounds like a song written and performed by a toddler, which is fitting cuz it's Patamon.

This song captures Patamon's one braincell energy (which was on display in the new 02 movie). He doesn't really sing about Takeru much which feels a bit like a wasted opportunity.

Steppin' Out - Takeru & Patamon duet (Listen here - subbed)

I liked the theme and lyrics of this one but the vocals were pretty rough...It sounded like Patamon's VA didn't match Takeru's VA's energy very well and together they sound kind of off key.

Takeru singing about taking off his ripped shirt kinda made me laugh because I pictured like a sexy romance novel cover dude. So not Takeru's image.

Seriously Patamon just kinda sounds disinterested in this song

Hikari & Tailmon

Gentle Rain - Hikari (Listen here - subbed)

Kind of a boring, slow song, but I liked the overall theme. Hikari's showing her vulnerable side and talking about how she can't be strong/brave at all times.

I'm not sure I really understand the rain metaphor here...I think maybe when she's saying it's not an "intense rain" she's saying it will take a long time for her weakness to wash away, but that's okay? IDK, kinda clunky.

Getting up - Tailmon (Listen here & Translation here)

Pretty similar to Hikari's song, but more melancholy. I found this one kind of relatable because I can get existential pretty often. The lines "What can I do? I still don't know. Because I was born my journey continues" hit me.

Tailmon sings about, basically, how life as a digimon is tough and confusing, with all of the nonstop battling. Still, she wants to stay strong for those she needs to protect. (Tailmon kinda has similar vibes to Renamon...or maybe it's just that they both have deep voices.)

Shining Star - Hikari and Tailmon (Listen here - subbed)

This one felt kinda half-assed lol. I think I might just be getting burnt out with all these songs that effectively have the same message.

So yeah, just like a lot of other songs in previous albums, this was a generic song about Hikari and Tailmon being different but loving each other anyway and striving to be their best for each other. I guess it's nice to hear a more optimistic song at the end of the album since the first two were pretty downbeat.

Ken & Wormmon

ONLY ONE - Ken (Listen here - subbed)

Aw man, I'm disappointed that Ken's solo song is from the POV of his Kaiser days :/ oh well. It's still a fun song. I like his evil laugh at the end.

I think this song does a good job of illustrating Ken's internal struggle between good and evil, but always turning to the darkness in the end. I also enjoyed the rock n' roll vocals.

The Future You Dreamed of, The Future I Dreamed of - Wormmon (Listen here - subbed)

Lol Wormmon's such a simp for Ken, but I love him so much 😭❤️ This song was great!! The jazzy instrumentals, the back up vocals and the passion/love in Wormmon's voice were all on point.

This song is all about Wormmon not giving up on Ken and understanding he has good in him that he wants to protect. So pure and sweet <3

True Strength - Ken & Wormmon (Listen here - subtitled)

Omg I loved this one 😭😭😭 so precious! Sure, it may have the exact same theme as a bunch of other songs ("we're so different, but we love each other!") but it definitely has a greater impact considering Ken and Wormmon's baggage.

I loved the light and jazz vibe of this song, I was picturing Ken and Wormmon in tuxedos with tails doing a lil tap dance routine together.

"Your form reflected my heart" omg 😭😭😭

Ken had a whole mini arc in just this album lol

[happilychaengs]

jennie - the girl that didn't pass you by

a/n: i wrote this in like a day and i'm happy with how this turned out though i'm still feeling nervous of publishing this. i have two other fics that were supposed to be christmasy office stuff and they're pretty fleshed out but i'm not so proud of them

jennie kim x gender neutral reader

word count: 1,386

all fluff

The sweet and inviting aroma of roasted coffee beans filled the air as you walked in, the brisk wind whirling around as the door closes behind you. You adored this café. This was basically like your second home.

You took a look around, glazing over everything the café had to offer. Christmas classics played quietly from every corner of the building, now instilling it with that child-like wonder you felt was missing. There was some neatly handwritten chalk on the walls of the specials today. A handful of people were present, scattered around the café, all of them kind of just doing their own thing.

And finally, there was that one barista, whom you knew as Jennie according to her nametag, working the register today. You'd always only come here during her shifts. She had a gummy smile, a beauty mark under her left eyebrow which you're sure no one has noticed before, and from what you could tell from your short encounters with her, a great personality to match.

"The usual?" She knows your order by heart. Even if she doesn't know you per se but she knows of you. You nod, as you lug your bag to your usual corner. Sitting down and waiting patiently for your order, you glanced out the window as you looked over all the people passing by, going through the motions of life.

It always seemed too fast for your liking. You always thought if you got caught up with the tide, you'd never be able to stop and inevitably reach the end with a hard crash, so you've decided for yourself to avoid all of that. Tearing your eyes away, you took out one of the books from your bag that you've loved rereading to this day. The Perks of Being a Wallflower. You smiled to yourself as you saw you were nearing the end of the book again, your bookmark stuck between one of the last few pages.

But before you could start turning those pages again, you heard someone clearing their throat and noticed a cup of coffee being placed in front of you in your peripheral vision. When you looked up, it was her. Jennie.

"May I sit?" she asked, with a small smile.

"Of course," you said as you set your book down, returning her smile.

You couldn't help but want to leave the cup there after picking it up and inspecting the foam art. It was too lovely to ruin. It was a simple heart, but you could tell how much work went into it. You set it down once more.

"Not your thing?" She asked with a cute pout apparent on her face.

You shook your head, "No... it's just that I didn't want to ruin the art."

She let out a small laugh as she leaned closer to the table, her eyes wandering around your table. "Well, that's awfully nice of you but you should drink it before it gets cold Y/N."

Your eyebrows arched in confusion, a slight frown appearing on your lips, "How do you know my name?"

She laughed again as she moved her hands all around her body, signaling the outfit, "Did you forget it's a café? If I didn't know your name, that'd be a bigger problem."

Your cheeks turned a soft shade of pink as you felt embarrassed at your sudden lack of common sense, "Right... Anyways... what are you doing here?"

"I'm on break right now and thought I'd say hi to my favorite customer." A sly grin makes its way across her face, all the while you're blushing even harder, eyes downcast. "You're interesting Y/N. I just wanted to get to know you, that's all."

Her eyes make their way to the book you've set down to your left. They widen in surprise. "That's a great book."

You're surprised. Most would say that they've only seen the movie. "You read it?"

She nods plain and simple, "That's my favorite so far." And almost instantaneously, she glances up at you again, the look of curiosity and wonder playfully dancing on your lips. You look like you want to ask her more and she's happy to answer.

Then finally, you have the courage to do so. It goes on for what seems like hours, even if it's mere minutes, while you're getting lost in her words and intricate explanations. Your infatuation with her almost seems to grow into something more in this moment. Your entire sense of being has shifted into something more, and she could clearly see it.

She smiled at your demeanor while rocking her chair back and forth, "Say Y/N... do you want to hang out after I'm off my shift?"

And to say you were surprised was quite an understatement. You mean, you didn't expect her to ask you anything, let alone talk to you. All you did was admire her from a distance. Nothing more, nothing less and you thought she'd be one of those people you pass by in life. The people who make an impression on you and who just never seem to stay but she was just so different.

You just gave her a tight-lipped smile as you reach for your now cold cup much like her warning to finally take a sip, the taste of peppermint and Christmas goodness filling your senses and the sound of her giggling at your foam mustache. "Of course."

And those hours before the end of her shift just seemed to pass you by but you weren't against it for once. As she took hung her apron on the wall and walked out from behind the register, she gave you a small smile while putting on her overcoat. "Shall we?"

"Let's." And then she unexpectedly loops her arm around yours, her eyes wide with awe at the lights that had been hung up for the holidays. The white and red that seemed to gleam ever brighter with every step you took. The snowfall that seemed to make its way to you as small flakes descended upon the two of you, Jennie sticking her tongue out in amusement and catching a few. The few lights that were visible in the surrounding buildings so late at night, you could only imagine what was happening in there.

And although the two of you haven't decided where to go yet, you enjoyed this. The spontaneous and unplanned nature of it. She drags you anywhere and everywhere, somehow making it to the town square. A big evergreen tree planted in the center with all kinds of ornaments hung up, covered in snow. You sit on a bench nearby as you see her running around, enjoying the night sky and the snow that comes along with it but before you know it, you get hit hard by a blast of freezing cold on your face, your vision impaired by a soft, slushy-like substance that drips down.

You wipe it off and your eyes meet hers again. This time there's a mischievous glint in her eyes and a playful smile on her lips as there's another molded ball of ammunition in her now red, cold hands, ready to throw.

Now that you think about it, maybe it was this night that your life seemed to just get a little bit faster. A little bit more exciting as you got hit directly in the face by another wad of snow, hearing a cheer of victory from the other side. She was definitely not just passing you by. "You're done for Jennie!"

Time flies by again in your little snowball fight and the two of you are left flat on the ground next to each other, breaths rising into white puffs to the stars above. "That... that was the most fun I've had in a while." She admits with a chuckle. "We should do this again Y/N. Not just the snowball fight but you know... the whole shebang."

You let out a breathy laugh as you stared up at the night sky, filled with dazzling lights. It was almost like even the stars were all watching this moment between you two. A big grin stretches across your face as you reply, not knowing that life would move even faster with this girl by your side. "I'd love to."

[quillandsaber]

A Jill Warrick costume breakdown, because I can

Here's my "best guess" on how everything she wears is put together. On one hand...it's a Final Fantasy costume, and we all know it's all about aesthetic over pragmatism, but because I'm writing something that needs a layers breakdown, I might as well do it here.

(This is heavily based on staring way too long at the art book, so at least I do have some basis for my assumptions.)

Invisible underlayers: I'm positive she has on some kind of undershirt with at least short sleeves and probably some kind of lower-body undergarment as well, in addition to stockings/hose/socks. The fabric of the white tunic is too rough and its construction too structured to be right next to the skin. And since she wears snug leggings, she's surely got something underneath for chafing purposes. These would be of a plant-based material.

Leggings/Breeches: I think these are navy, but some illustrations in the art book portray them as off-white. I'd assume them to be wool, but in the 18th century a lot of working men wore chamois leather breeches (which appear kind of a creamy off-white when new) because they were hard-wearing and would stretch/mold to fit your body. Either way, I expect they button just below the knee (because as anyone who's worn knee-high boots with trouser-legs tucked in can tell you, a long trouser leg just ends up bunching up towards your knee over the day) and the rest of her leg is covered by the stockings/socks. Experienced wearers of 18th century men's clothing have informed us that properly-fitting breeches buttoned below the knee are, for most people, perfectly adequate to hold up knee-high stockings without additional garters.

Shoes: Flat shoes of brown leather, I'm guessing no more than ankle-high (more on that later). Jill Bearup would be proud.

Gaiters: These appear to be dark-blue leather and button up the side. They cover the top of the shoe and the stockings and serve as a protective layer. There's really no reason to have thigh-high gaiters if you also have high boots, which is why I suspect her shoes aren't as tall as you'd imagine.

Gaiter-garter: The brown cuff just below her knee is probably a separate piece that keeps the gaiters from falling. A lot of early tall boots required some form of garter to keep the looser and floppy stand of the boot from sliding down to the ankle.

White tunic: I believe that both the white blouse-portion and the white skirt-portion are all the same garment as they appear to be the same texture and color. The drape of the sleeves reminds me of crepe crepon (a textured weave with a bit more body than most crepes), and my gut says it looks like silk crepe crepon but it would make more sense if it were a wool crepe. It would be constructed from a fitted, interlined yoke and unstructured front and back panels, cut shorter on the front panel than the back panel. Structurally-speaking, the yoke looks to be too close-cut for her to be able to pull it over her head even if she took off the ribbon...but eh. Final Fantasy game. If I were making this for cosplay I'd probably just make the neck slit go a teeny bit lower than would be game-accurate.

Overskirt: This is the bright blue miniskirt and long black sash-y bit. I can only chalk up the long black sash-y bit to it being a Final Fantasy game needing to be Extra (tm), but the blue miniskirt would have the benefit of providing some weight to help keep the white tunic from flying up during activity. There's a lacing closure at her left hip. I'm assuming it's wool due to the weight.

Fitted leather bodice: This layer probably provides most of her torso protection as well as bust support. The belt below the bust certainly suggests that bust support is one of its functions; having worn medieval and Renaissance clothing quite a bit, I can verify that you don't need a garment right next to your skin to provide all your bust support even if you're generously-endowed (which Jill is not). It has a "belt loop" over her left hip to suspend her sword-belt.

Sword belt: Leather sword-belt that suspends a chainmail panel backed with white fabric. I can't get a good look at the texture of the fabric, but it would make sense that they'd back the chainmail with some kind of fabric to protect her clothes underneath since the texture of riveted chainmail is really destructive to basically everything; that panel of backing fabric is probably cheap and rough stuff intended to be replaced.

Sleeve garters, glove, and vambrace: self-explanatory. The lacey bit at the gauntlet of the glove is probably glove lining.

Fabric belt dealies: There's an illustration of these in the art-book: a white triangular pennant with embroidery on it and a blue rectangle wrapped together and suspended over her left hip. I am assuming these have some kind of personal significance, but I don't know what they are.

[retropobor]

Screw it, I'm an art blog now, have some more art (UTY pacifist Route Spoilers for part of it, also there's a lot of text you have to read in order to have this thing make sense)

This is my most recent work, made just last night. It's not perfect, but I'm proud of how it turned out, Although I feel as though pretty much everything needs an explanation here, especially if you feel like you recognize someone here.

For those of you who don't know (AKA pretty much every one of you other than maybe @yaboi88900) I run a DnD campaign. A very very poorly balanced DnD campaign. With a mix of heavy amounts of homebrew, and an inability to get anything playtested, I have my fair share of monsters who have almost resulted in a TPK, so I decided to put them all in an artwork to memorialize them.

Left and right: Blood elementals

A while back I was watching a a dungeon dad video about a creature known a blood elemental, and I thought they were cool, so I added a combat encounter against them. I was expecting quite a few people, so I thought 1 per person in the 4 person party worked out, and made a combat encounter against 4 of them... 2 people showed up, and as it turns out a CR 5 Blood elemental is actually pretty dangerous against a level 5 player, so even after killing 2 off, it was still a brutal combat session. There wasn't much else to say about it though. In my opinion, it was rather forgettable.

Middle (Bottom): The Cabinet Man

Ironically the blood elementals weren't the worst encounter of the storyline. Again 2 people showed up for the session, because during this time, we were struggling on player count. Basically everything after the blood elementals was this whole Lemon Demon based plotline with the BBEG being the main character from No Eyed Girl/When He Died, and the quest giver being the main character from Touch Tone Telephone (I can go more in depth in another post if y'all want to know more about it). As you are probably beginning to realize that fine figure in the center is based on Cabinet Man. He's one of if not the first stat block I ever made, which means he's not balanced in the slightest. I'll save the details of what this Cabinet Man can do for a different post because there's a lot on him, but for now know that he's never met a foe he couldn't kill before his second phase. Also he gave my players a crippling fear of arcade cabinets.

Background: The Demon Core Golem

I never actually ran this one because it's too late game for any campaign I've ever ran, but even without running it, just about everyone who's seen the stats has an innate fear for this thing and for good reason, because this thing is strong. It only has a few attacks, but all of them deal a lot of damage, and as expected for something named after the demon core, this thing is highly radioactive, meaning it deals massive amounts of unblockable poison damage if you get near it, and it can give out radiation sickness (CDC accurate radiation sickness at that). Survive all of that, and it does the job its father could only dream of, and becomes a literal nuclear bomb, at which point pretty much all you can do is run. Yes it is as powerful as it sounds. No I don't know what I was thinking when I made this.

Middle (Top): Ceroba Ketsukane, Defiler of Pacifism

This one's the most recent of the lethal encounters, having the related plotline finished tuesday. So Undertale Yellow came out, and I absolutely loved it (if you couldn't tell already), so I decided to adapt bits of the game into a plotline in the campaign (albeit with some lore and plot edits to fit the world, and because total plagiarism just ain't my style). Well if you know anything about the pacifist route, the final boss is Ceroba who dons a mask and becomes incredibly powerful* The party was sweeping through Ceroba's first second phases, and most of the third phase with ease, so I decided to quit sugar coating it for the second half of the third phase. When I was making the stat block for Ceroba I gave her an aoe attack, and perfect for her, all the players were grouped together in one place, so I decided to use that AOE attack, and in one round, I accidentally reduced the entire party other than the sorcerer in the backlines to hit point levels ranging from death saving throws to 4 at the best. Safe to say I re sugar coated it after that. And for anyone wondering, Ceroba was spared, and is now safe and sound in Ketsukane mansion, and she may or may not become a quest giver for some more side quests, Idk yet.

[khaotungthanawat]

Artists and designers self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five works in any medium that you've created, then pass it on to at least five other creators. Let’s spread the self-love 💛

aw thank you for thinking of me, cat! apologies for being so late to do this 💛💛💛

💜 icon: pete saengtham set - this set was a BEAST to make (the first gif alone took me two days to get the way i wanted it kdfshfj), but i love the way it turned out! i set out to really let loose with typography and animation and transitions, and i think i pulled it off.

🧡 only friends + iphones set - when @cal-kestis shared her template for her incredible iphone sets, i had to give it try! coming up with different color combos and thinking about what the characters would prioritize on their phones was a lot of fun.

💖 emotions: love + uncertainty (sand x ray, only friends) set - this set reinvented itself a few times bc i wanted it to express what was happening between sand and ray at the time it was being posted. i'm often inspired by music, and when 'do i wanna know' by arctic monkeys played in one of my mixes, i knew that had to be the basis. that sand mentions liking arctic monkeys in the show only helped fuel that. i was inspired by this set, esp by the second to last gif, and i wanted a similar effect for my set. it took FOREVER to get it (mostly) the way i wanted it, because i had to just. figure it out? it's not as seamless as it is in the inspiration set, but i think i did okay?

💛 sand x ray, only friends (inspired by this beautiful set by @seamayweed) aka the kintsugi set - i fell in love with sea's kintsugi set and when the prompt of 'inspiration' was announced for the userdramas event, i immediately thought of it. the timing coincided with eps 8 & 9 of only friends, and i was thinking about how ray has these 'cracks' and sand is the gold lovingly piecing them back together to help make something even more beautiful......that was corny as hell but that was the thought process. honestly? i think it turned out beautifully and i'm really proud of it.

❤️ halsey - finally // beautiful stranger (sand x ray, only friends) (tw cracked glass effect and flickering neon) - this was a birthday gift for my beloved @henwilsons, who loves sandray as well. she also likes halsey, so i combed thru some songs and finally (heh) decided to work with 'finally // beautiful stranger'. i feel like the mood and lyrics of the song mirror sand's feelings for ray: this beautiful stranger bulldozes his way into his life and he wants to believe they can just be friends, that sex between them won't change anything ('and i say i'm only playing'). but whoops he fucked around and fell in love. and he's been hurt but he can't help but want this man. (god these bozos mean so much to me.) i wanted the set to have a 'last call at the bar' kind of vibe, so i used deep blue and red and then paired that with neon lighting. the cracked glass effect to convey being terrified and hurt just made sense to me. i think it turned out nice, and mia really liked it, and that was the most important thing!

💚 put that blorbo under a microscope!: ray pakorn - she's new but i love her! like most a lot of my sets, i didn't have a solid idea in my head about what i wanted to do. i knew that i wanted to gif ray (he's such a dumpling), that the scene of ray and sand in the hallway of the rehab center with the green floral art behind them made me want to use green, and it evolved from there. infinite thanks go to @deokmis who patiently listened to me ramble about this and gave me valuable suggestions and feedback that made it so much better! i love this set and i'm obsessed with green now.

so there you go. yeah, i know. i did six sets. i couldn't choose and also i don't know how to shut up. don't be like me. be normal.

[itsbasicallycanon]

Hey, it's me againnn! Soo I was wondering, do you do any drawing exercises to improve?? Like any perspective or foreshortening practice? Or just practicing with drawing poses? If so, can you tell me what you do? I seriously need to get better at drawing the anatomy properly. Also, I'm changing my art style yet again and I'm looking for advice :) Thanks <3

Also, I was very proud of what you did with the prompts I sent you. It wasn't what I was expecting from that prompt at all. It was better.

Firstly, thanks for the kind words <333 This is gonna be a ramble but I hope it helps!

Honestly the way I improve the most is just drawing something I know I can't at least once. Like here's some pics where I push my perspective little by little.

They don't always look right so I usually don't finish them but! I draw it once and can easily see what I don't understand about the perspective. From there I usually try to draw it again with a reference cause now I know what I need to look for in the reference, like which shapes or 3d forms go into the thing I'm drawing.

This applies to any concept you struggle to draw btw! Perspective, body types, face shapes, muscles, an animal you've never drawn before. You don't always have to go right back into with a reference handy either- especially since sometimes it's hard to find that exact pose or reference. What I've been doing is just watching my animated media and I tend to take note of how they drew the thing I struggled with. Because I struggled with it, it's a lot easier to notice when they do it my show or comic. Like when someone tells you how hotdogs are made so know you think about it every time you see one.

Well that's the general advice but for more specific things like this one I drew for my friend I simply couldn't fathom how to draw the pose so I used a 3d poser and worked out the shapes.

Just in general I also try to sketch out random poses to hopefully improve my anatomy. Doesn't have but anything elaborate as long as you're understanding the form. Sometimes limbs make no sense so it's good to glance at muscle anatomy. (I use AdoraSketch's website and MagicPoser on iOS.)

But I cannot stress enough, I do this all causally. My progress is been limb by limb. I learn to draw a specific muscle in the arm, learn to draw the jawline from an upward perspective, etc. Typing it all out makes it feel like an art class final but most improvement is subconscious. Probably my biggest advice is to keep drawing what you love. I still can't draw beefy men but my love of Nightwing keeps me crawling back every year or so. Also Laios from Dungeon Meshi. I would not bother half the time if I didn't want to draw my blorbos doing funny stuff.