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valhallanrose · 4 years ago

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Monster Miriyam Headcanons

So, to preface, Miriyam is still technically human - her monster form comes about as a contract with her patron, the King of Swords, and manifests this way because she is halfway to becoming a member of his court. She’s essentially got one foot in the realms of the arcane, the other in her/the normal world - changing or transforming means pulling magic from the realm of the Suit of Swords and rather than expressing that through spells, does so through self modification. Hence the monster form, which was inspired off the Nyx Hydra design for the King of Swords in the Arcana tarot deck. She’s met with Arcana a few times now and while some very perceptive humans read her more as Arcana-adjacent than anything else, the Arcana very much believe that she’s human regardless of what form she takes.

Size-wise, she’s about 7’2”, not including horns (horns make it a good 7’10”). Very muscular and definitely as strong, if not stronger than you think she is based on appearance alone. Prehensile tail.

Miriyam doesn’t break this form out without a long conversation as to what she is (only held with potential long term partners, really, casual hookups don’t usually get to a personal enough point to warrant that)

Transforming is kind of gross, honestly? Like this is some very audible crunching/popping, like when you crack your knuckles but way louder, but it’s also a very fast paced change so you don’t hear it for every long

She’s got some habits from the monster side that have quickly become noticeable when she’s wandering about as a human.

This includes enhanced sense of smell, hearing, and sight.

Smell and hearing are particularly intense, though, to where she can pick up on a mouse running on the palace marble or tell you exactly what spices someone mixed into a dish as soon as she stepped into the kitchens.

Sight is trickier to quantify, but the average human with 20/20 vision can see the furthest edge at 3 miles away. Miriyam’s would be somewhere in the 4-5 mile range, while night vision is about 3-4 miles (assuming clear skies and no obstacles)

Very catlike? Loves to sun herself if she can find a private spot in the daytime, will purr if you scratch behind her ears, also easily tempted by shiny things (particularly gold shiny things, her eyes get bigger than her brain at the idea of Expanding the Instinctual Hoard)

Extremely embarrassed to admit she has a not insignificant collection of gold coins and trinkets she’s collected over the years based purely on instinct - she has no idea where half of it came from

Has gone and still goes on long flights, usually to get out when her nightmares get bad. While her secondary form isn’t necessarily a secret - she used it in the Coliseum during her brief time as a gladiator, and most of the guard is aware simply for the sake of ease - she still waits until nightfall for some sense of privacy.

Her favorite place she’s ever gone was to the Scourgelands, where she flew through the southern lights, and she’s hoping to bring a partner there one day if they’d be alright taking the fast route.

When it comes to fighting prowess, she’s absolutely a predator - armored scales, claws, fangs, speed, strength...fuck around and you will find out and yes I do mean that double entendre

There’s some art refs under the cut from @anonbunnyart and @lajadelmira so you get an idea of what she looks like, and then we’re going to dive into the thirst.

In case it isn’t clear: NSFW AHEAD, MINORS DNI, also obvious monsterfucking cw

by anonbunnyart

by lajadelmira

Still cis, still a lesbian, so she’s still attracted exclusively to women and femme-presenting nonbinary people, the pool is only narrowed based on if her partner would ride the dragon.

Yes I’ve made that joke many times, no I’m not going to stop making it. If I don’t, just assume I’m dead

Absolutely a top and a dominant top at that, convincing her to bottom when she’s in monster form is very, very difficult and usually only comes about in niche circumstances. More on that later.

Addendum: She’s slightly more willing to bend if you want to use your hands/mouth, but straps are damn near impossible for her to get into when she has all of you right there to pay attention to. She’s not opposed to being touched, but she’d really just rather pay attention to her partner like this.

Personal pleasure is very much just an afterthought, and honestly, she’s okay with that

Has several ‘weak spots’ on her body that will definitely turn her to putty, no matter how tough she acts. Done in sort of a sensitivity scale from least to most.

Horns:

It’s not that they’re sensitive, but if you grab her by the horns and tell her exactly what you want to do her/her to do to you, she’ll find it very hard to tell you no.

Loves it and will take it as encouragement if she’s going down on her partner and they grab her by the horns when she does something they like.

Tail:

Her tail is prehensile, and she will use that to her advantage, including fucking her partner with the tip of it (which is nice if her partner likes penetration, because finding a strap to fit her in draconic form is A Whole Nightmare)

However, she will go a little apeshit if you play with the tip otherwise - particularly if you suck on it - and honestly you’ll probably get pounced

Wings:

Quick note - Miriyam usually keeps her wings tucked fairly close to her back as a sort of protective measure, and she doesn’t usually like being on her back because she doesn’t like them being pinned, but can ease into it with a partner

Loves, loves, loves it if you touch her wings - the membranes are sensitive and just running your fingers across them makes her want to purr like a kitten

Fun fact, stimulating the right spot on her wings will actually make her orgasm. (That spot is on the wing membranes closest to her back, about halfway down, and no, that’s not something Miriyam will realize until she has a partner that wants to explore her physically like that)

Territorial. Absolutely a territorial bastard. She tries to tamp it down, she really does, but some days it’s harder than others. Particularly when she can pick up the scents of other people on her partner, that really kicks up the ‘mine’ instinct even if she logically knows nothing happened and trusts her partner fully

She really likes scent marking because of this - no, she won’t piss on you, that’s just the best term I can come up with - but she has a few approaches if she’s feeling like she needs to ‘stake her claim’

Lots of roaming hands and definitely letting her mouth wander, but if not directed to a specific spot she will absolutely go for a full bite on your pulse point to really just layer the scent in there

Tucks shed scales into the pockets of her partner’s clothing (jackets, shirts, pants, etc)

Or, a good old fashioned absolute obliteration - by which I mean she’ll fuck her partner until they’re an overstimulated puddle in her lap plus an orgasm for good measure - and then taking care of them afterward

That being said, this definitely goes both ways, she will be raring to go if you just murmur a ‘mine’ in her ear - she’ll be eager to prove that yes, she is yours, and she’s not going anywhere

When it comes to actually doing the deed...

Favorite positions (in no particular order)

Partner pinned to the wall, any position, just. Pinned to the wall

One hand around both her partner’s wrists, legs spread out over her thighs, the other hand between their thighs or otherwise roaming

I feel like I should mention here that monster Miri has a habit of filing down at least the first two claws on each hand (middle and index) if she knows sex is on the table, she’s not out here to hurt her partner like that

Seated on the edge of the bed, ideally facing a mirror, with her partner in her lap. One hand/her tail tip between their thighs, and arm around their waist, chin on their shoulder watching them in the mirror

Yeah this is definitely a favorite of monster Miri’s

A handful of things she enjoys (all with prior consent)

Primal (predator), some painplay (ft. claws, teeth, and a very strong grip), sensation play, overstimulation

Some turn-ons

Lingerie, but the shinier the better

Gold accents in particular will really make her go AWOOGA, she jokes it’s because of the gold dragon hoard but it’s actually not far off

Dirty talk/dirty...actions?

Just manhandle her she’ll think it’s hot

Any and all of the brat fighting words

“What are you going to do about it?”, “Make me.”, etc

Honestly the more I think about it I’m not sure there’s an off switch so much as each side of the switch being fight or fuck. Like. Miriyam is always horny like this. She can chill but why would she in the privacy of her home/when she’s with her partner

This might be. TMI. But the scale plating over the fun parts is….retractable I guess? I don’t know what word I want but they’re not always out because that feels like a hazard. And unfortunately no nips like this because those are also a hazard, but her neck, ears, lower belly, and the previously mentioned areas are all very sensitive and prime for the touching.

#miriyam von helvig #monster miriyam #lemon juice #my thirst knows no bounds #and i will not apologize

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yandere-flower · 5 years ago

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Pls I need Anto with a male tall and shy dom praising him all night, thank you!

I took a little liberties but I am very happy with how this ended up.

Someone tell me to stop writing bj smut

Antonio x Male reader with a dick under the cut

Antonio was infuriating when he worked. Infuriating in the sense that every thing always ended up caressing the edge of his lips, the boy so lost in thought that he doesn't realize the wetted bristles of his brush were lightly skimming across his bottom lip. Whenever he would get stumped with a piece, or contemplated his next move, he had to be doing something. That something, unfortunately for you, involved his mouth. Whether it was the constant licking of his lips, or they way he pushed the edge of his brush into his bottom lip, you were entranced by the way he so mindlessly fixated on his lips. The worst part was, he wasn't even doing any of this for attention.

Most days, watching your lovely boyfriend with his mouth was enough for you, but today was different. He was commissioned for a large piece and he's been spending all week on it as oppose to you. You normally didn't have to ask for cuddles, or attention, but this piece was draining him of everything. You at the very least expected him to spoon you in bed, but the artist just collapses and falls asleep the moment his head touches his pillow. You had to admit, you were a bit...pent up. You didn't like pulling Antonio from his work, but God, he's been staring at the one spot for a good ten minutes now. He needs a break. He needs to stop putting that wet paint brush so close to his lips.

"Anty.....do you have a minute?

The raven haired boy turns to look at you, answering your question with a hum. His eyes were glazed over, and you can tell he was still enthralled by his painting. You were jealous of your boyfriends own art, how pathetic. But when he looked at you, even in his tired state, you felt more confident than usual.

"You have a little something on your mouth, I think...I think you kissed the bristle end again". A laugh escaped your mouth, your boyfriend could get so lost so easily. The hearty chuckle from your partner lightened your spirits, as he grabbed a painting rag and tried to wipe it off.

"Better?"

It was just a little paint, easily picked up by the clean edge of the cloth. But, he didn't know that. In his attempt to remain, "vanity free" unlike his father, he didn't have a lot of mirrors in his place. Most days you would make fun of him for it, but today you were grateful. It was an excuse.

"No, um..not really. Come here". You spread your knees to leave a spot for him to kneel in front of you, pulling yourself forward from the edge of the couch. Unsuspecting, he eagerly crouched down in front of you, looking so beautiful as he looks up to you, waiting.

"You have got to stop putting things so close to your lips" you sighed out, gently gliding your thumb alongside the curve of his mouth. You slow, tender movement eliciting a moan from the man beneath you, his eye fluttering at your soft heartedness. He soft "sorry" was barely audible, but like all things you knew he gets lost in thought so easily.

"Wouldn't you much rather have something else grace your lips?". His hands tighten around your scrawny thighs, begging for more attention. His face leans into your touch, desperate for more affection. You cruelly move your hands away from him, drawing out a plead for the smaller man. "God, you're such a tease babe". You shush him as you slowly pull down your zipper to bring out your half hard cock. That same glazed look in his eyes returns, but this time solely focused on your member. He smiles that adorable crooked smile of his. "I have an idea to sate my...fixation.".

You buzzed with anticipation at his eagerness, never before have you been this bold. Antonio lifts himself up, using your knees to get a better angle. Almost impatiently, he pushes himself down you length and lets out a hum that vibrates against your cock. Antonio's approach to cock sucking was just like his approach to art. Starting off fast and stronger and lulling in the middle do to getting lost in himself. However today, today you wanted him to focus on you and you only. Your hand finds itself hovering over the back of his head, gently resting on it before somewhat roughly gripping his hair and pushing him further down your length. As he gasps for air you worry you went to far, but the pleasurable whimper coming from the boy only encouraged you. You knees widened so you could push him down even farther, although you didn't have to now due to how eager he was to please.

"That's it...fuck you're so good.". The heavy sounds of your panting interrupted your praise. "Please...please give me more. You've been so neglectful to your baby."

You wanted to let him up for a breath, but the looseness of his body and the drool dribbling down your member told you that he was far more pent up than you. Your grip on his hair grew tighter, but you went along with his pace as he sucked up and down your length. The coiling feeling in your stomach told you that you were so close to finishing, yet you couldn't just yet. You didn't want to be the one who was a mess tonight.

"Let me...let me paint you tonight". You pulled his head of your cock, the ruined look of his puffy lips and lidded eyes was just the final thing you needed as you finished on your canvas. Mouth opened and eyes fluttering, the sight of your boy with cum dripping down his face was more than enough retribution for you. You both sit there for a minute to recover, as Antonio goes to wipe himself with whatever piece of cloth that is nearby before being the first to speak.

"So, was that a critique or constructive criticism?"

#I'm still sick but dammit I'll write #antonio #male yandere #yandere x reader #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #flower answers

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ineffable-endearments · 5 years ago

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Psycho-Philosophy and the Angels, Part III (did you think I was going to escape the id, ego, and superego?)

Part I (Aziraphale as collectivism, Crowley as individualism) is here and Part II (Aziraphale as Adam Young’s collectivist half, Crowley as Adam Young’s individualist half) is here. Other people seemed to like Part I the most so far, which is odd to me because I was way more interested in Part II, but hey! To each their own!

Summary of essays so far: I babble about the notion that Aziraphale and Crowley are figures who represent the harmony of collectivism (investment in the community) and individualism (investment in the self) in the human mind. What they find is exactly the same harmony that helps Adam choose to save the world.

During this next part I’m going to try to figure out which actual parts of the mind Aziraphale and Crowley might represent. Yes, Freud makes an appearance.

Disclaimer: This is not meant to be a discussion about real-world psychological science. It’s about theoretical constructs which make appearances in fiction. Psychoanalysis started as a real-world theory and some people still swear by it, but I don’t. It has made its way into art and literature as well, where I do happen to think it’s interesting and useful.

Summary for people who aren’t familiar with the terms: psychoanalytical theory, a controversial and outdated theory started by Freud and pervasive in literature that involves psychological symbolism, suggests that the human mind is made up of:

the id (totally subconscious, basic drives and instincts, wholly selfish and short-sighted)

the superego (mostly unconscious but often sort of within a person’s awareness; the sense of morality, the “ideals” that adhere to social rules)

the ego (a long-suffering construct which is constantly trying to moderate between id and superego AND cope with the limitations of reality, and which houses the conscious portion of the mind as well as a bunch of unconscious processes).

I do get an “id/ego/superego” feeling from Good Omens. The self-orientation of Crowley is sort of id-like, and the idealism of Aziraphale is sort of superego-like, and the balance of Adam is sort of ego-like.

But critical thought is too central to Crowley’s character for me to be convinced he actually represents the chaos of the id; in a way, he’s really the opposite. Meanwhile, Aziraphale doesn’t trust his own judgment enough to symbolize the superego, and judgment is pretty much the whole point of the superego!

You probably could refer to the roiling, short-sighted chaos of Hell as representative of the human id. And you could probably refer to the rigid rule-mongering of Heaven as the superego. In that sense, with Aziraphale and Crowley as their “representatives” on Earth who agree to balance the two forces, the pair of them actually represent just...the ego.

And you know what the ego is supposed to have in spades to help it cope with all the conflict it has to survive? Defense mechanisms.

I bet we’ll recognize these defense mechanisms in our favorite angel and demon. The concepts can get a bit murky and have been given different names over the years, but I’m sure you’re familiar with the following notions, many of which our protagonists use at some point (ninety percent of the time, it’s Aziraphale who’s doing this, but Crowley has his moments):

repression: it’s carried different meanings over the years. now it usually refers to the notion that an individual knows something about themselves is true, but holds it back or perhaps carefully ignores it. could be anything from a total denial of the truth to the resolution that this truth has to be buried.

projection: having an unacceptable thought or urge but assuming that the object of the thought or urge is actually the one who is experiencing it.

rationalization: a behavior that would normally be unacceptable is explained away in a way that makes it sound entirely justified, if not superior.

splitting: thinking only in extremes, being unable to reconcile between the positive and negative qualities of oneself or other people.

reaction formation: having an unacceptable thought or impulse and then acting out the opposite behavior in a very exaggerated manner.

regression: reverting to a previous stage of development to deal with anxiety instead of taking steps toward a more adaptive way of coping, often because the adaptive way of coping scares the person somehow.

displacement: trying to meet a socially unacceptable urge by replacing an unsafe behavior with a safe one. not unlike sublimation, but the “safe” behavior is usually not very constructive.

sublimation: channeling a socially unacceptable urge into one that is actually healthy and productive.

Note that in this context, “unacceptable thought or urge” sounds really severe and judgmental, but it just means a person perceives their thought or urge is somehow problematic. It might be morally offensive, and it could apply to thoughts or urges that are severe. But it might also just be that the person recognizes that if they were to accept the thought, it would be emotionally painful, or if they were to act on the urge, other people might think badly of them for it.

These aren’t ALL of the defense mechanisms, but it’s some of the ones that I think appear in Good Omens. Maybe I’ll do a post highlighting when I think they appear for Aziraphale and Crowley as individuals.

But for this post, I’m looking at them as a mind united.

If you view them as a mind united, Crowley is the part of a person that wants to move forward, that wants to be true to itself, that wants to be happy. He does represent base desires, in a way, but he’s informed by a logic that is not compatible with the rest of Hell. And Aziraphale is the part of a person that follows the rules, that is trying to be safe, trying to keep itself alive in a world that is frequently unkind to those who are genuine. To simplify matters greatly, you could say Crowley leans toward seeking happiness for the two of them while Aziraphale leans toward seeking safety, although of course they try their best for both and neither wants to see them end up unhappy or unsafe.

It does tie back to individualism and collectivism as well, with Crowley representing desires related to the Self and Aziraphale being highly concerned with those outside, the Collective, in terms of what they will think and what they will do to the Self.

The two of them operating as two halves of a whole is a fascinating thing, because there’s absolutely no question that they do! But they don’t always seem to know it, especially Aziraphale. After all, he cuts Crowley off twice: in 1862 and at the bandstand. He also very strongly refuses responsibility for losing the Antichrist child, and leaves Crowley out of the decision-making process when he locates Agnes Nutter’s book. In all of these situations, Crowley trusts him to be on “their side,” and in all of these situations, Aziraphale pulls away. It appears that he doesn’t understand them as a cohesive unit until the very end.

...Right?

Sort of.

Aziraphale views them as a cohesive unit within the Great Plan, and he thinks that their role is to oppose each other, not to work in harmony. Because he is not individuated enough to figure out how he can separate from Heaven, Aziraphale believes that bonding too closely will destroy Crowley, since if Crowley comes into contact with Heaven, they will Smite him, and if Hell finds out about Aziraphale, they’ll also destroy Crowley. It’s sort of like Aziraphale is that anxious, repressive, protective instinct that’s coating the outside of their psyche, trying to protect it from both the cruelty of the outside world and the impulses deep inside.

So really, Aziraphale has always seen them in terms of a duality, too. It’s just that he starts off thinking they absolutely must be characterized as enemies and orbiting each other at a distance rather than characterized as a partnership.

Aziraphale’s “breakups” with Crowley always involve multiple motivations. He’s usually afraid of getting caught “fraternizing,” yes. He does represent the part of a person who genuinely wants to connect with the collective, and Aziraphale believes he’s upholding the Greater Good by keeping to this model of behavior as well. But the breakups are also protective gestures toward Crowley. They keep him away from Heaven and/or Hell. It’s the same way that people usually suppress or repress their emotional needs - yes, people want to belong, they want to be accepted and play by the rules, but they’re also trying to protect themselves from being hurt by others.

And in this context, Crowley, the individualist and the one who always encourages Aziraphale to think independently, is a very important part of the Self that their metaphorical ego is trying to protect. I suspect that if Aziraphale thought his behaviors would not have consequences for Crowley, he’d be acting very differently indeed, just like humans don’t hold back from pleasure when they don’t believe experiencing it will be dangerous.

The other ways that Aziraphale rejects their partnership, by refusing responsibility for the loss of the Antichrist and by keeping Agnes Nutter’s book a secret, are attempts at maintaining control, not because he’s a controlling individual - in fact, I’d say Aziraphale is happiest when he doesn’t feel like he’s expected to be in control - but because he thinks he can make the two of them safer that way. If Aziraphale accepts responsibility for losing the Antichrist, it weakens his argument that they are on opposite sides. And if he tells Crowley where the Antichrist is, he can’t involve Heaven in their plans because that would be dangerous for Crowley - and yet, he’s convinced that somehow, Heaven is going to swoop in and save everyone.

Aziraphale’s gambit at the bandstand to try and convince Crowley to join Heaven is rather like an individual human being trying to bargain with themselves that they’ll genuinely change something deep down inside so they can be themselves and be socially acceptable. It involves quite a bit of projection, reaction formation, and an attempt at sublimation that doesn’t go very well. The final act of “breaking up” with Crowley is sort of like the defensive part of the ego realizing that if it accepts its urges any longer, it’s going to do something dangerous, so it regresses, represses, and denies a core part of the Self.

Going back to the superego concept up there: the superego is the “ideal” self. If you view Heaven as a kind of superego symbol, and Aziraphale as the superego’s representative, then his allegiance to Heaven broke when he finally realized that Heaven does not match Aziraphale’s own ideal self. He no longer identifies with them. And he no longer thinks either Crowley or humanity should, either.

If Crowley and Aziraphale are an ego formation, then by the end of the story, they’ve negotiated a healthier superego than Heaven.

Like I said in the previous essays, and as Michael Sheen so eloquently explained, you can’t simply divide these two into a pair of halves. They each have a little bit of the other - the thing that the other represents - in them. They are each a complete person, an individual with a relationship to the collective, who has a number of issues, and each ends up reconciling those issues by the end of the story (Aziraphale has a bit more to do than Crowley, but Crowley does work himself out in some ways, too). But the notion of teamwork, of complementing sides and the fact that their differences make them strong when they work together, doesn’t go away.

#good omens #good omens spoilers #ineffable husbands #ineffable spouses #ineffable partners

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sophiejoedwards · 5 years ago

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Reflections

February-March 2020

After being given our module brief I wasn’t quite sure where to begin, my first instinct is to make, create, explore and experiment with materials to discover my 3D outcomes and context often corresponds to the work retrospectively, however I had to change this way of thinking, and bring myself out of this comfort zone. I started asking myself questions about artwork in general. What am I interested in? What do I want to know more about?

One of the best galleries we visited in Lisbon has stuck in my mind. For days of looking in galleries I was repeatedly thinking how within a gallery space it’s sometimes difficult for me to connect to intangible art in this sort of setting, there is a separation between you and the artwork. Installations are different, due to the sensory nature of some installations, I feel like it’s sometimes easier to connect to this sort of art. I often find interactive and playful art more engaging as it removes this distance between the viewer and the artwork and is easier to connect with due to it often having a multi sensory appeal. One of the best galleries we visited in Lisbon (in my opinion) was Modo De Uso. You are handed a playful ‘handbook’ guide to each artwork where Claire de Santa Coloma has written a suggestion guide to how to approach and respond to the artwork with her drawings used as reference “If you made it this far, thank you. The artist is now responsible for your level of satisfaction”. Rather than being a passive onlooker the artist encourages you to connect to the artwork discovering it’s sensory appeal. As humans we like to look at art because it simultaneously affects our senses, our thoughts, and our emotions and ___’s encouragement to embrace the sensory-tactile element of his artwork certainly heightened the overall experience for me and my friends. I’m also intrigued by the ability of this installation to be able to transmit the same message to diverse groups of people through the tangibility of the work.

To better understand my personal position my research has begun by asking general straightforward questions like :

Why do we appreciate art? Where does this appreciation come from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/beastly-behavior/201709/why-do-humans-make-art

Is art about beauty? - Connection to the natural world/ connection of a visual stimulus with an inner emotional state - argued that this comes from evolution- and the attraction .

Appreciation also comes from knowledge and experience that is common between the artist and the audience. Art capitalizes on specific stored memories and associations in the brain of the observer. Further still, the ability to make and use tools, a skill that began in apes and exploded in hominids, requires a great deal of visual and tactile memory.

Art induces visual recall of past events or emotions - Art capitalizes on specific stored memories and associations in the brain of the observer. Visual memory was important to survival

Visual representations and expression - memories, life, culture

Art aids in communication and education - evolutionary visual aids - a language of their own

Some scientists have suggested that art helps us to bond as groups; and that the brain is programmed to notice and enjoy simple patterns PATTERN RECOGNITION. The human brain is constantly looking for familiar patterns, to impose meaning on a complex world.

Where does this leave contemporary or abstract art? Ability to use visual representations to induce memory recall or visual understanding.

Art invites us to contemplate outside the box, and explore and better understand ideas we weren’t conscious of before? (Salvador Dali) to i.e through depicting bizarre worlds, subconscious states/ unreal and illusory depictions.

: In developing his general theory about how humans decide what they like or dislike, he lines up evidence to show that what people believe about a work of art is crucial to the way they feel about it.

https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2010/jun/20/modern-art-all-in-mind

The value of art !? "Traditional art is about what is in the world; more modern works are about the very process of representation," he writes. "An appreciation of much of modern art therefore requires specific expertise. Any dope can marvel at a Rembrandt, but only an elite few can make any sense of a work such as Sherrie Levine's Fountain (After Marcel Duchamp), and so only an elite few are going to enjoy it."

According to Bloom, someone who invests heavily in abstract art and explains that they simply love the shapes and colours is only telling half the story. He believes that the psychological patterns described in "signalling theory" apply to the purchase of modern art. In other words, a rich man or woman tries to distinguish themselves from the pack by spending money on the right thing. "Any schmoe can buy, and appreciate, a pretty painting, while spending millions of dollars on abstract art might display a combination of wealth and discernment," writes Bloom.

I also fully expect that artistic talent would have eventually been transferred from our culture to our genes. After all, during a million or two years of natural selection, artistic ability was likely to confer some advantage on those that had it. This advantage could have come in the form of increased social standing as a leader in the hunt, a prolific teacher of skills, and so on.

Does appreciation of art- or an artistic eye run in genes ?

https://www.theguardian.com/science/blog/2013/sep/19/born-creative-study-brain-hemingway

In highly creative individuals this connectivity is thought to be especially widespread in the brain, which may be down to genes that play a role in the development of pathways between different areas. These genes reduce inhibition of emotions and memory, meaning that more information reaches the level of consciousness.

So, are we born creative or not? While factors such as upbringing play a crucial role in your brain's development, the work done by scientists in Scandinavia, Germany and the US has shown that having the right genetic makeup can make your brain more inclined towards creative thinking. The rest of us have to "learn" to be creative.

Context is key - One study showed that people liked paintings less if they thought they were made by a computer rather than a human artist, even when the pictures were actually identical.

How our brains process visual information is not the only factor to consider.

Scientific studies indicate that we derive more or less pleasure depending on what we know about the subject. This applies to our enjoyment of, for example, food and drink as well as art. - So when we identify and understand a piece of art we connect to it better

STIMULATING SENSES

https://www.bbc.co.uk/teach/how-do-we-understand-abstract-art/zhkvxyc

think of a project and an idea for the theory and context as opposed to a 3D outcome, my initial urges are to create, make and explore materials and see what comes of this, instead I began by asking myself some questions about the artworks that interest me, specifically the type of artwork. Firstly I wanted to create a series of videos using this little plastic toy children’s pottery wheel to throw functional pots in unusual places, like the underground or on the top of a mountain. I liked the idea of a playful performance piece then began thinking about participatory artwork and how members of the public could take part in this piece. I also liked the idea of filming in the wilderness, responding to ‘site and place’ by throwing vessels using clay collected from a specific place, filming this vessel being created in this specific place, drawing attention to this direct connectivity between the land and the artwork and the maker. (in a dream land I also imagined it being wood fired at this location and eating food from this vessel that was gathered/found/ foraged. To go full cycle.

Playful nature of Bruce Mclean

“Art has become very serious, I think it should be something more enjoyable”

https://olafureliasson.net/archive/artwork/WEK108821/moon

https://library.bathspa.ac.uk/items/eds/edsglr/edsgcl.499406627?query=participatory+art&resultsUri=items%3Fquery%3Dparticipatory%2Bart%26checkbox%3Deverything%26facet%255B0%255D%3DEdsRecordOptions%253A%2522IsFullText%2522%26target%3Deds&facet%5B0%5D=EdsRecordOptions%3A%22IsFullText%22&target=eds

http://www.moonmoonmoonmoon.com/#sphere

https://www.dawsonera.com/readonline/9781137033642

A group of people to be directly engaged in a creative process

Inspiration | exchange |unknown outcome

https://www.tate.org.uk/art/art-terms/p/participatory-art

https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?p=STND&u=bsuc&id=GALE%7CA544635325&v=2.1&it=r&sid=ebsco JEREMY DELLER

http://innovacion-soci.webs.upv.es/index.php/social-cartography

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arcticmaggie · 6 years ago

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The Art of Deception (pt 5)

Y/N and Harry set off on a mission to thank Kayla for bringing them together. Personal conversations, realizations of feelings, and the art of deception ensue.

(Masterlink in bio! Sorry! links mess up my appearance on tags)

Word Count: 3.9k

Warnings: rlly short smut in the beginning! that’s it

A/N: Guess who’s back! With yet another super late post! But, I have an excuse this time!! I didn’t have access to my computer for a good 2 weeks sooo. But I’m back and would appreciate feedback! Just one more part and I’m done I promise. Enjoy (or don’t enjoy, it’s up to you)!

Harry really doesn’t understand what took him so long to find a succubus in his life. Sure, him and Y/N got off to a bad start—his first instinct being to track her down and kill her simply because she kind of humiliated him in front of nobody. But you know what? Once he reprogrammed his brain from destroying her to, you know, destroying her, he’s realized she’s not that bad after all. Especially now that he’s waking up with a half-hard cock stuffed into the mouth of the loveliest creature he’s ever met.

“Oh—fo’ fucks sake, love—“ he all but moans out as his eyes squint down at her tired figure lapping on the underside of his prick. His hand instinctively reaches down to her head and he’s encouraged by a sweet hum from Y/N to start combing his fingers through her hair, coaxing her through it. “Was m’cock not enough for yah last night, eh?” Harry mumbles out, now with a fully hardened dick that pulses every time Y/N flicks her tongue against the slit of his head. His tone is a bit teasing, but with slight endearment, because really—how can he be upset with waking up to this? Y/N pops off of him to reply with a pout formed on her lips, “just need to make you feel good. It pleases me to please you,” and goes back down on him, evoking another grumbly moan from the curly haired man. And Satan, he can’t really say no to this girl. He doesn’t even want to say no, of course, for the obvious reason. But she keeps eye contact with him while wrapping her lips around him and—call him crazy, but he thinks there’s this sort of silent spell being cast upon him to coat his entire body with pleasure and ease, making him relax against his pillow, close his eyes and give in. There’s a small thought floating around in the back of his mind about the questionable number of men Y/N has probably already done this to in the past, before literally taking their soul once they’re fucked out and too relaxed to oppose their own death. But this concerning thought is quickly dismissed once Y/N reaches a hand down and squeezes Harry’s balls softly. He leaves it at poor bastards, and thanks Satan himself for taking away his soul the minute he turned immortal. Sure, he might not have a beating heart or a heaven to return to once he’s gone, but he gets to be in bed with a creature who was born to fuck, and honestly, he really can’t complain. -

“Is the only cereal you have really Fruit Loops? Are you a 5 year old?”

“Heeey, Fruit Loops give me enough sugar to energize myself for the day. Don’t be rude.”

Harry snorts and grabs ahold of the box of cereal, pouring himself a bowl now that watching her eat made him hungry for some as well.

After Y/N finished him off, they went back to sleep for another hour or so before she woke up with the urge to pee, tiptoeing over to the kitchen afterwards to start her morning. Harry woke up about half an hour later with the widest smile of euphoria in the world and a growling stomach.

He usually serves himself some eggs and toast—you know, something high in protein and fiber to substitute his lack of blood supply (his feeder is off on vacation to the Netherlands, which is inconvenient for him but she promised to bring back some bitterballen so it’s compensated for). But seeing now that the only breakfast option in Y/N’s kitchen is a kids cereal, he’s gonna have to resort to his 20th century years when sugared cereal was all the rage.

“So,” Harry starts, once he’s poured himself his own cereal (much to Y/N’s disgruntled face as he helped himself to her kitchen without even asking), “what’s on the agenda today? Another helpless man you plan to rob?”

Y/N whines out, “heyyy,” once more and sticks a tongue out to him, which he laughs at and attempts to catch the end of it with his fingers before she retreats it back into her mouth.

“As a matter of fact,” replies Y/N, “I was planning on going downtown to buy Kayla some of her favorite desserts as a thank you for yesterday.”

Harry hums and takes a bite of his cereal before mumbling out, “shouldn’t you be thanking me and my dick as well?”

This time around, Y/N extends a hand out to smack the back of his head from across the small kitchen island, evoking a hiss from the curly bloke.

“Oi—was only joking.” Harry rubs the back of his head with a pouty face while Y/N snickers underneath her breath.

They eat in silence for the rest of the time they’re filling up their stomachs, both in their own world of thought.

Y/N, on one hand, is innocently thinking about what bakery downtown would have freshly baked lemon coconut cake without her having to manually call in and tell them to bake some for her.

But Harry, on the other hand, is mischievously thinking about how he’s going to approach asking Y/N out on a date.

Usually, all it takes for him is his sly signature smirk and girls are more than willing to offer up their ovaries to him. And he’s sure that although most of it is thanks to the fact that he’s a vampire, it also has to do with the fact that he’s undeniably attractive for this day in age and Y/N can’t possibly argue against that. Yet, from what he gathered from the liquor store, a few charming words and award-winning smile will not make Y/N fall to her knees like the rest of the bunch (although, technically, she has already been on her knees for him this morning).

So after he’s finished making a mental list of all the possible approaches of bringing up the romantic subject without sounding like a womanizer (which he totally is) but also without sounding like a complete sap (he will never catch himself being lovey-dovey and pathetic, no matter how lovely Y/N is), he gulps down the remaining milk in is bowl and slams it down on the counter, startling Y/N as he hops up from his seat and marches down the hallway in search of the bathroom to make himself presentable for the public.

Y/N is left confused and with two empty bowls to wash, which she is not happy about, but grumpily starts her way to the sink to wash her dishes. And she takes her time, because well, she doesn’t have class today so she has no reason to be out and about so early in the morning. She figured Fernando’s would have the lemon coconut cake ready and if not, they’ll whip up something fast. Since the last time she ordered, the awkward boy at the cashier put everything on the house (she wanted to refuse, she really did, but she also wanted to get her nails done so, beggars can’t be choosers).

She’s just finished drying her dishes when a scoff is heard from behind her, making her whip around and face a less than amused Harry standing at the kitchen entrance.

“Ahem? We don’t have time for you to go at a sloth’s pace!” Y/N furrows her eyebrows and opens her mouth to question him but he continues, “Go get changed already. It might rain again in the afternoon and since neither of us has an umbrella, we need to hurry downtown and seek shelter before the sky ruins the trip.”

Oh? Harry wants to go with her? She figured he’d finish his business in the bathroom and be on his way to the next girl he wanted to bag. Which, in a way, kind of hurt her to think about, but also, she can’t be one to talk considering that she doesn’t sleep with men because she wants to be with them, she sleeps with them to literally eat their soul. It’s odd for her to admit that she’s glad Harry doesn’t have one.

She shakes herself out of her deep thoughts and looks back at Harry who is now donning an expectant look at her. She flushes a bit and mutters a quick apology before scattering past him and into her room.

He always manages to make her go on a tangent without even realizing and it pesters Y/N. She blames it on him being a vampire. They are always up to no good. She can see it as she returns to him a few minutes later; he looks down at her with a strange gleam in his eyes and a small twitch of his mouth as he fights a smile. He’s up to something, she tells herself as he opens the front door and leads the way outside.

Y/N has seen enough vampire movies to know that they’re supposed to be moody and mysterious and only reply to questions with short ambiguous phrases that leave you lusting to know more.

Harry just happens to be an anomaly.

“And I mean, how can I not accept the preacher’s hot daughter as a sacrifice, yanno? Sure, it was kind of fucked up for me to play along to the whole I’m a vampire and I’m going to suck everybody in town’s blood if I’m not offered a virgin on a full moon, but in my defense, when I was handed the girl, all I did was bid them a nice day, took her to my home, fed her some of my to-die-for linguine and gave her about three orgas—oh, we arrived already?”

Harry, to Y/N’s relief, halts the story of his trip to Italy in the 19th century as she slows herself down to a stop in front of Fernando’s, extending her arm to stop him in his tracks as well.

“Yeah, well it’s only a 10 minute walk from my apartment,” Y/N replies, thanking her past self for picking such a close complex without knowing it would one day save her from getting her ear talked off.

“Well, anyways,” Harry begins once again, reaching out to open the entrance door, but Y/N extends her arm once again to pull him back a bit. He looks back at her with confusion.

“Um, Harry, how about,” Y/N softy starts, seeing how much Harry wanted to recount his life to her, “how about you put this story on hold for a bit? We’re going to be inside with other people and I don’t think they’d find it amusing if they overheard you talking about a virgin being offered in return for not murdering an entire village.”

It takes Harry a second to process her words and then processes his own as he realizes how bizarre he must of sounded to all those strangers walking past them these past few minutes as he recounted his golden era of being a vampire dick. He shuts his mouth and nods at her once in agreement and finally opens the door to lead her in, already trying to rack up another subject to discuss as they wait in line.

Y/N tries not to roll her eyes as he begins to talk about how a bloke named Niall is head over heels for Kayla and pretends to pay attention with random nodding of her head and hmm’s sprinkled in as a response to his short pauses.

She’s maneuvering her eyesight over the menu above the front desk to actually see if the cake she wanted was offered but also slips herself into a small train of thought in the process.

Harry is acting a bit different from that one minute encounter between the two at the liquor store (which seems like ages ago, to her). She figures it’s because of the fact that he was pathetically trying to hypnotize her into giving him the umbrella (she admits inwardly that it wasn’t pathetic, it was just cute). But also, with the night before, he was being a bit annoying with all the dominance he was trying to assert on her. And again, she figures that that’s simply because he’s a vampire and he’s used to having everything go his way.

But listening to him now, go on for so many minutes about his life and the attractive girl he had in his arms without seeming to be bragging about it, just simply relaying what has happened to him in the past, she can’t help but seeing that it’s all a front. This womanizer appeal that he sports seems to be fabricated. Or at least, it’s not who he truly is. Maybe he’s picked up this asshole personality along the way of his years of wandering the Earth, but it’s certainly not his true self. This is his true self, right now, blabbering on about his best friend like a 5 year old at show and tell. He’s sweet, whether he enjoys showing it or not, and Y/N likes it. She likes him.

He’s still talking about how he has started planning a date for Niall to ask Kayla out on since Niall can’t be romantic by himself for the life of him, when it’s finally Y/N’s turn to order her sweets. And he wants to go on talking while she orders but he sees her quirk her smile up delightfully and he feels his throat close up on him, forcing him to breathe in a harsh intake of air. She is so undeniably pretty, Harry thinks, and his face softens at her beauty as her lips move along to the words that are delicately coming out from them. It takes him a second to compose himself once he snaps out of this sudden and unexpected cooing over her, and he has to look down at the floor, clear his throat and run a hand through his hair before looking back over to her. But as his eyes shift up, he catches a glimpse of the teenage boy handling the cashier behind the desk and he has to take a double take.

He can practically see this boy start to drool over Y/N, his clammy hands struggling to input the order into the machine, with the most prominent blush engulfing his cheeks. He wants to laugh at the adolescent, wants to roll his eyes at this young man’s pathetic havoc of hormones. But when he finally turns to Y/N and sees her hand reach up to brush some hair behind her ear while giggling softly at the boy stuttering the amount due, he stops himself and widens his eyes.

Oh, he thinks to himself, she’s doing the thing.

Harry really didn’t consider beforehand that she would use hypnosis to get what she wants. Sure, he uses it almost every time he is confronted with a person who is in his way of getting what he wants. But Y/N just seemed too...pure for that. Which, really, who was he kidding? She’s just as demonic as he is.

But as she turns to him to hand Harry the receipt, she catches at how dumbfounded he is staring down at her, and she blushes with guilt like as if she has been caught stealing candy from a baby, and it’s confirmed to Harry that she’s too pure for this life.

“What was that?” Harry asks, resting a hand on her lower back as he pushes her towards a small table near the corner of the store. The question only evokes a warmer blush and a shrug from Y/N as she sits down.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she replies, keeping her eyes focused down on her fingers twiddling with each other on the table.

Harry’s lips stretch into a wide grin and lightly nudges her shoulder.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about!” he starts again, “You’re a conniving little shit, aren’t you?”

This seemed to spark a flame inside of Y/N because she quickly whips her head up to look at Harry with an appalled look. “Excuse you, you’re the one who tried to manipulate me into giving you the damn umbrella,” she bites back, but Harry is still grinning ear to ear.

He raises his hands in defeat and nods along, “Alright alright—So we’re both working for the devil.”

His act of backing down from the potential argument causes Y/N to calm down across from him, and she nods curtly to him before casting her eyes back down. Neither of them speak for the next minute, leaving Harry to panic and try to stir up another playful conversation. His eyes flick up to the counter and he sees the cashier boy argue with a confused and exasperated baker, a slip in his hand that Harry can barely make out to read lemon coconut cake. He’s about to comment on the scenario playing but Y/N seems to beat him to it.

“It’s not like--It’s not like I enjoy using my ability to get whatever I want,” she spills out timidly next to him, and he turns his head to see that she’s also looking at that direction with a slight frown on her face. “Like right now,” she continues, “I hate seeing the aftermath of me charming the boy to call out for another lemon cake after he explained to me that they took it off the menu a month ago. But I always give Kayla the lemon coconut flavored one when she helps me out like she did last night.”

Y/N pauses for a bit as she recounts the fact that Kayla’s form of helping her this time around was bringing Harry to her and her cheeks heat up. She continues.

“And I mean, sure, I can just try and find another place that might sell it around this vicinity. But I figure it won’t hurt anyone if I just twist my words a little and smile a bit prettier than I usually do. So I do it. I use the hypnosis strategy. But then--” she takes another pause, this time in order to compose herself because she can already feel her throat closing up and her eyes threatening to start forming more liquid than usual. Harry wants to reach over and take her hand into his as he watches her, his heart clenching (as much as he wants to ignore that).

“But then I end up actually hurting the person I use it on. There have been so many occasions where guys get in fights with others and unintentionally harm themselves just so I can have a milkshake, or a pencil, or a fucking cake. And I instantly regret what I do but I can’t reverse it, and it sucks, and I wish I could learn to stop harming these humans. But even restricting myself from having sex has almost killed me and I just can’t stop and I hate it.”

Harry is at a loss for words.

He never actually thought about the fact that Y/N was beaten up over her own natural essence. Especially considering since he absolutely basks in his own powers. Being immortal? He loves it! Getting people to do what he wants? He indulges in it! He never thinks about the repercussions of his actions in the eyes of the victims, only thinks about how everything goes in his favor. Yet here Y/N is, despising herself for slipping up every now and then.

He’s never really seen himself as a villain, as much as the media depicts his kind as such. But now that he sees Y/N with tears prickling at her eyes—staring at the boy who’s now back at the cashier register with a torn up pink slip and a sour but confused look on his face, probably wondering what got into him to yell at his co-worker—he realizes that he’s a dick. A straight up dick for preying on innocent people who have no choice but to obey what he says as they stare into his eyes. And he wants to stop, for Y/N.

So as Y/N shakes herself out of her own thoughts and sniffs softly, Harry realizes that the only way to get even close to wooing her over, is to be gentle. Be kind and generous and a gentleman, someone to keep her from remembering the fact that they were dark creatures and there was nothing they could do about it.

“They’re not going to bake the cake. We should go home,” Y/N finally says, lifting her head up to catch Harry’s gaze with defeated eyes. Harry wants to erase this emotion from her existence entirely.

But all he can do is offer a soft smile and ask, “How about we go to that bakery next to the movie theatre? The ladies there are the sweetest things to me and I’m sure they wouldn’t mind whipping up a new batch for a pretty girl like you.”

Y/N only responds with heated cheeks.

It makes Harry smile wider, standing up from his chair and offering a hand for her to get up as well.

“Let’s go then, don’t want to keep them waiting.”

Harry walks with her at her side across the room and hurries ahead a bit at the end to open the door for her, and Y/N mumbles out a thank you as she walks out into the open. But she thinks it goes unheard since as she turns around to look at him, he isn’t right behind her. In fact, he’s let go of the door and gone further inside.

Y/N’s eyebrows pull together in confusion and she shuffled close to the window to peer inside and see what he’s doing.

Neither she nor her heart is prepared to see Harry leaning against the front counter, taking the young employee’s right hand and clasping a 10 dollar bill into it with a firm shake of his own hand. Y/N’s eyes quickly flicker up to Harry’s face and she watches his lips form around the inaudible words for your trouble.

She stands there, in front of the window, speechless, and watches Harry finally pivot on his heels and walk over to the door, opening it carefree and stepping out into the chilly morning, eyes sweeping over the sidewalk until he catches her by his side. He grins up at her and offers the space between his arm and his waist for her to grab ahold of him as they begin their journey further downtown. But before she accepts his offer, she suddenly reaches up and plants her hands on his shoulders, raising her heels to lean up and press a firm and sweet kiss on his cheek.

Y/N leans back and her heart skips a beat as she notices the soft red tint creeping up Harry’s neck from the form of affection. She merely smiles brightly at him when he looks at her curiously and loops her arm around his, beginning the steps down the sidewalk with the words, “So, tell me more about your plan to set up my Kayla and your Niall.”

Y/N doubts the bakery they’re heading to will provide her the cake she needs and the next best thing does seem to be this elaborate plan Harry is scheming.

Nevertheless, she lets Harry lead the way to the shop, tucking herself closer to him as small gusts of wind blow against them, blaming the cold weather for her close proximity.

She’s given up on the dessert. But Harry doesn’t need to know that.

#harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry fanfic #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfiction #harry x reader #harry styles x reader #harry fic #my work

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takealottodragmeawayfromreddie · 6 years ago

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I don't give a fuck about your personal morality

If you're glad Tumblr is doing this just because "it won't affect you because you don't consume adult content", you're a selfish asshole. Don't compare this to the LJ and ff.net bullshit, this is not "I wanna see smutty art of my favs uwu" drama, there's people who get their food on their table with this platform. People who haven't hurt anyone and really depend on Tumblr to literally LIVE.

If you're super against sexual work because it's usually exploitation of people who aren't doing it voluntary, let me tell you Tumblr is probably the only place where sex-workers do it freelance and because they want to do it. So, yeah, bold of you to assume that licking Tumblr's ass on this censorship policy is the virtual equivalent of punching PIMPs and ruining their business. The only business this will ruin is the one that belongs to regular, innocent people. And if you oppose to sex-work not because it's abusive, but because you're "más papista que el papa" (like we would say down here), let me tell you that taking others' way of living away from them must be the least christian thing ever.

But if you still don't care, well, they're not the only people who will get hurt by this decision. A lot of porn blogs belong to people who can't express their sexuality freely in the place where they live, who deal with sex-related mental illness such as sexual repression, who are sexually frustated and can't do anything about it. For a lot of people, this new policy means giving up their only safe space to enjoy and embrace their sexuality.

How do I know this? Because I'm one of them. I have been dealing with my sexual repression for years. I might never have sex in real life because of how heavy it is. I developed anxiety, body dysmorphia and depression because of this. My body is just too weak to have sex (I could get really hurt if I did it wrong), I can't stand nudity and intimacy, and my germaphobia turns any activity involving body fluids into a nightmare.

Lately, my panic attacks have been getting worse. A bad experience with someone I loved but who was extremely toxic to me fucked me up completely. I stopped eating and I can't sleep at night.

My 18+ blog was the only place where I could express myself and feel better with myself. It was the only place where I could feel wanted. Just one follower's praise could change my day fully and make me think, even for just one second, that I deserved love and pleasure, that there was nothing wrong with my body and my head.

Now I'm going to lose all of that. I can't just move to another adult content platform. Have you ever been in one of those? Those are real hellsites. The only place where I knew I wouldn't run into something I didn't want to see, where I could talk and enjoy my body with respectful people who cared about my boundaries and encouraged my progress... it's Tumblr. And now I won't have it anymore.

Do you honestly think this will help? Then maybe you aren't old enough to be here at all. The only things that will happen are:

Pedos and other disgusting people will find more subtle ways of get their shit pass under the radar (and we'll probably run into them more unexpectedly.)

Sex-workers, artists and people who really need to express themselves sexually will lose their job/safe space.

Again, pedos and other disgusting people will probably move to another platform. A far less popular and far more private one, where they can share their shit without the fear of getting caught/exposed.

Without a safe mode around, you might run into gorey/triggering stuff, including the adult content that will unavoidably pass under the radar. (Monitoring and giving people the tools to keep sensitive content out of sensitive audience's eyes is always better than banning.)

People will start moving to other platforms. Even your favorite writer or artist who doesn't post adult content might shut down their blog to give Tumblr a middle finger. Fandom death itself.

Tumblr will lose one of the only things that made it different from any other social media platform.

So, yeah, if you go for the "lol this won't affect me" approach, you're a selfish person who needs to re-think a lot of stuffn If you think this will help any real life child/victim of sexual violence/forced sex-worker, I feel bad for you. If you think Tumblr is doing this for the users, you clearly haven't heard of the App Store drama and you're too pure for this world. And if you feel as angry/hurt as me with the difference that you have money, move to Pillowfort (it looks amazing) and donate to AO3.

Seriously, if you want to keep just one thing of this rant with you, donate to AO3. Even if it's just one dollar. They genuinely care for their users and try to protect their right to express themselves. Show them some fucking love.

Please reblog, share and get your shit together.

#tumblr

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hollowedrpg · 6 years ago

Photo

CONGRATULATIONS, SARAH! — You’ve been accepted for the role of Charity Burbage. What I loved most about your application was the way in which you gave Charity’s newfound fire a source other than her wife’s death. It doesn’t come from death, but life — her wife’s life and the way she lived, ready to take on her own war of sorts. The little details throughout your application kept it a fresh read from start to finish. I’m so excited to see you continue to develop her character.

Thank you so much for applying. Please create your account and send in the link, track the right tags, and follow everyone on the follow list. Welcome to Hollowed Souls!

Name: Sarah

age: 24

preferred pronouns: She/Her

timezone: EST

activity: I would say my activity should be a 6-7/10 overall. My life can get pretty hectic from time to time but it ebbs and flows and I’ll be around to plot and check in most days and able to write replies 2-3 days out of the week.

are you applying for more than one character?: Not this time!

how do you feel about your character dying?: I mean of course I would be sad to see Charity go down in this war but provided I was able to have some measure of creative input as well as able to return to the rp as a different character I wouldn’t be opposed to seeing how Charity’s death plays out. She’s not a soldier for all that she’s trying to be one right now and it wouldn’t surprise me if she did end up as a casualty. To be completely honest the angst addict in me wonders how her death would affect the Order and the plot, would her light going out bring more hopelessness or would it spark dying fires of rebellion? A terrible part of me would really like to find out.

anything else?: Nothing except to say that you’re a fucking Queen Janelle and this roleplay is everything I dreamed it would be when you first mentioned it and more.

ic details.

full name: Charity Melina Burbage

Charity: Meaning “generous love” it is hard to imagine a name more fitting for Charity who was born with a heart overflowing with love for the world around her. Although Florence would have loved any child just the same, it was her wish that she would have a child who would give back to the world the joy that she herself had received in bringing them into it and she wrote that wish into her child’s name and delighted to see it come true as her daughter grew. For a long time all was as her mother had wished it. Her family was not perfect but it was defined by genuine love and kindness and for many years that was enough to keep the darkness from slipping in through the cracks. Little did she know that there was something else flowing within her precious child that would open the doors to a darkness more cruel than she could have imagined.

Melina: Meaning “honey.” Although it was Florence who swore up and down that all the honey she ate when she was trying to conceive and continued to crave throughout her pregnancy was the source of Charity’s honeyed tresses and sweet soul it was William who insisted, eyes twinkling with gentle mirth, that they pay homage to her belief with a name that would soon become his favored nickname for his only child. Although many of his mates at work offered veiled condolences on the gender of his much longed for child William could not have been more overjoyed with his bright young daughter who met him every day upon his return from work with gifts of braided flowers and treats from the kitchen. It had put a chill in his heart the day she disappeared, however briefly, behind a barrier that he could not breach into a world that he could not fully understand. Although his wife’s undaunted faith in their child and Charity’s own eager curiosity won him over at the time and he encouraged his daughter to find her place in this strange new world that was hers by right of magic the chill never fully faded away and in time he would come to see there was more reason than fatherly concern behind his apprehension.

date of birth: 23, February, 1953 (Pisces Sun, Cancer Moon, Libra Rising)

former hogwarts house: Hufflepuff

sexuality: Pansexual Panromantic

gender/pronouns: she/her

face claim change: nope!

more.

how do you interpret this character’s personality? how will you play them? include two weaknesses & two strengths.

Charity was born with a bright seed of light inside of her that flourished in a home filled with love and patience until it glowed with the warmth of a small sun. Secure in her parent’s love she was driven from a young age to share the fount of joyful kindness (+) that sprung from within her with the world around her. She could not bear to see anything or anyone suffer and was ever taking in misfit strays and wounded animals to nurse back to health, baking treats to give to their neighbors, and doing all she could to wipe frowns from any face friend and stranger alike. Even as she grew and found that the world was much colder than the loving nest of her hometown her light remained growing even stronger despite all those who hissed at her that she had no right to shine. There are those who would call her kindness weakness, even she has cursed herself more than once since the beginning of the war for not being stronger or harder, but there is value in the ability to lift others’ spirits. There is scarcely person alive in Godric’s Hollow who has not lost someone or something dear to them and Charity does her best to bolster the spirits of those around her with hope and kindness on the days she is able to. Unfortunately those days seem to be fewer and fewer as time goes on.

Once Charity’s inner warmth and kindness was as constant as the sun, but loss has worn away at it until some days it gives off little more light than a smoldering ember. The truth is that Charity is terribly depressed (-). Following her wife’s death she had rallied bolstered by her commitment to the cause of preventing further atrocities and the bonds she strengthened and formed within the Order. For a few years she found a purpose and despite the mounting horrors of war she held on tight to her belief that good would win out in time. The Massacre and attack on the Order Headquarters has utterly shaken that conviction and set her back into a darkness akin to the one that overwhelmed her when she first lost Althea. There is something even worse about the darkest days of this relapse that are tinged with bitterness and self-recrimination. When people look to her for the light she used to shed so willingly she is beginning to shrink away from them. So many of them are ready to give up and let hatred run free through their world, what makes them think she has anything left to give? Her mind is a mass of contradictions. At times she wants nothing more than to curl up in bed and let the world fade away and others she hates herself for even thinking of giving up or holding back from the people who clearly need kindness more than ever. Althea would have never given up or cast blame on the people she loved for losses that many of them also suffered. When hopelessness and bitterness threaten to overwhelm her she remembers her wife who was so determined to save the world from forces that Charity did not fully understand and she shores herself up, brews a pot of tea, and finds someone who needs a hand to hold or a shoulder to lean on.

Although most days she cannot see it, it is her spirit alongside the memory of her fierce beautiful wife that makes it so that Charity is so determined (+) not to give up no matter how dire the circumstances. When she was alive Althea was the ‘strong’ one in their relationship. Charity was plenty happy with a simple life full of beauty and was content when after many years of working at a small tea shop in Diagon Alley she was able to buy it from the owner and make it her own. She treasured the smiles of her customers and their compliments on her charmed teas and honey cakes. Although she too could be sweet and kind, Althea was more of a warrior than her sweet gentle wife. She was one of many scientists who formed the forefront of a movement to address the effects humanity was having on their planet and spent her days arguing against those who would harm the world she loved. Despite not fully understanding climate change Charity knew that Althea was working against the folly of men that could devastate both of their worlds if left unchecked. It is the fire she saw in her wife’s eyes when she spoke of men who would gladly let the world burn if it made their lives more pleasurable that is reflected now in Charity’s as she is faced with a group of people who would let their hatred and greed blind them to the evil of their actions. She has to believe that, despite all evidence to the contrary, good will win out over hatred and cruelty but she also knows that she cannot sit idly by and expect that to happen all on its own. So she remains determined to stand with the Order and make a difference despite the darkness in her heart and the world around her.

Although Charity’s determination remains strong, the fact remains that she was not born a soldier. In school she gravitated towards softer magics. She excelled in charms and potions that could impart an extra boost of calm or energy to a cup of tea or cake, heal small minor issues, make flowers bloom and last, and photographs move but she was less interested in dueling or defense against the dark arts. As a result she is weak (-) when it comes to battle magic which leaves her at a disadvantage being as she is one of a few remaining members of the resistance. In the beginning her lack of battle prowess had not mattered as much since the Order was better manned and she had other ways of contributing, but now with the Order on its last legs and beginning to fracture she is beginning to feel almost useless. She has learned to cast a Patronus, but is still struggling to learn enough offensive and defensive magic to make her presence in a fight more of a help than a hindrance.

how has the war affected this character, emotionally and otherwise?

There is little the war hasn’t stolen from Charity. It began as a shadow scarcely noticed in the otherwise blue sky of her life nothing more than harsh words hissed and whispered at her in halls and classrooms. By the time she realized how large and menacing the shadow of war had grown it was too late, it had already noticed her and stolen her love right out of her hands. Although it has been years since Althea’s murder Charity still wakes from nightmares with her wife’s name on her lips and tears soaking her pillow. She knows it was hatred, vile and putrid, that stole her wife from her but on her darker days it is hard not to dwell on her own part in her wife’s death. If it wasn’t for her Althea would have never been in the Leaky Cauldron that day. Althea never would have known there was a world existing alongside her own or that people might wish her dead solely for her lack of magic and the accident of her wife’s birth. If Charity had only paid more attention to the whispers and dark undercurrents that were rising on the streets of the magical world she had come to love alongside the one she had been born into she could have done something differently. If she had known how bad things were getting she could have taken Althea someplace safe. Even if she had only remembered to refill her floo powder her wife might still be alive and well. If…if…if…if, it was a torturous exercise but one that she had trouble stopping once it wormed its way to the forefront of her mind. Although it had felt like the end of the world when Althea’s bright green eyes drifted shut in a darkened alley way it was only the beginning. After Arthur told her about the war and the Order she had fought her way out of the darkness that had descended on her the moment the light had gone dark in her wife’s eyes to devote herself to helping them in any way that she could only to watch her friends suffer and die and finally become refugees of a bloody war.

Along the way she lost her home. After the Ministry was lost Charity had gone home to her parents and begged them to leave. All she could think of was how their home was linked to the magical world and the war that was tearing it apart from the inside out all because of her and the idea of harm coming to them because they had born a magical child terrified her. In turn they had begged her to come with them and she had tearfully refused them. They were safer without her with them and she could not turn her back on the only people fighting to keep what had happened to Althea from happening to anyone else. Her only concession was to give her mother a charmed envelope one of a set that would allow them to trade messages if they needed to and a promise that she would write them when she could. As soon as her parents were safely away she lit her envelope on fire to break the connection between them fearing it would be used to trace them if hers was ever compromised. It broke her heart to lie to her mother but her desire to protect her parents won out against the cries of a small child that lived in her chest who wanted ever so badly to run to her parents and hide. After her parents left she packed up what she could not live without, including a box full of photographs more precious to her than gold, and moved into the back rooms of her shop on the edge of Diagon Alley. The beautiful town that she had grown up in, had lived and laughed and fallen in love in, held nothing for her now. It was a ghost town full of lovely memories tinged with the pain of loss and like many things it only existed within her reach in photographs.

The Massacre and the combined failed Malfoy Manor mission and attack on the Headquarters dealt a final harsh blow to Charity’s spirit. It meant another home lost since there was enough to link her shop, sometimes used as a safehouse in the past, to the Order that it was not safe to return to. It meant that even more of her friends were dead or lost in a world that seemed colder and bloodier every day. It meant that they were losing, the death eaters took their losses as well she knows but so with Voldemort still living she knows he can continue to spread his vileness and infect new followers to fill his ranks, and that more and more of them wanted to give up. Once they relocated to Godric’s Hollow, a place so cursed by death that not even Voldemort would think to find them there, the already faded light in her chest began to flicker and bleed out. It’s hard for her some days to continue on surrounded as she is by reminders of their losses both in the landscape of the ravaged village itself and in the faces of her remaining friends.

where does this character currently stand? with those who wish to hide in godric’s hollow until the war ends, with those who wish to rebuild the order and continue fighting the war, or on neither side? Why?

Charity is torn when it comes to the schism that is beginning to tear at the center of the Order. On one hand she fully understands those who wants to do their best to remain safe and weather the war in hiding. She loves her friends dearly and wants them all to be safe and knows that there is no way to ever be fully safe while fighting a war. Not to mention there is the fact that given a chance to turn back time and keep her family together and safe far from the ravages of war she knows that she would very likely make the selfish choice to do so. But she also knows that Voldemort and those who think like him will never stop. She saw it in the eyes of the men who stole her wife from her. They knew that there would be likely be no way to avoid the repercussions of their actions, but it was worth it to them to make her and her wife suffer for the mere accident of their blood. Men like them… people like the remaining death eaters will never stop trying to destroy what they think it unworthy to exist in their world. And so those who would fight to keep the thorny vines of hatred from choking out the good in their world have to keep going as well. So as much as she understands the impulse to give in to hopelessness and hide away she stands with those who wish to rebuild and continue fighting. It’s what Althea would have done, it’s what the remaining spark of light in her soul is driving her to do. Kindness is not always soft. Sometimes it burns with all the bright heat of protective love and vengeance against those who would spread darkness. She does think that a secondary safehouse should be set up for those who cannot or will not fight, but she herself refuses to just stand by and let the evil that has infected their world and stolen so much from her and those she loves prevail.

Character Question: What is Charity’s role in the order? Has she found a place or is she still struggling to find her own way to help?

When she first joined the Order she was able to do enough to help in many little ways. She offered up her shop as a safehouse and a place to meet following missions and kept watch with a cup of soothing tea and a hand to hold for when people began to show up and had to wait to see who else would make it back. She kept an eye on the atmosphere at the edge of Diagon Alley and noticed when one by one her muggleborn regulars began to stop in less and less and then not at all. She hid messages in her daily specials and visited fellow members with baskets of food and flowers when they were injured or lost someone. Over time she established herself as a bright spot of hope in the Order by being ready with a smile and a listening ear despite having faced her own terrible loss before ever having joined the war effort.

Since the loss of her shop and her own mounting depression it has gotten harder for Charity to feel as though she is truly benefiting the order. She wants so badly to help and tries her best to remain a bright spot in the darkness for her friends and allies and to support those who reach out to her but there are days that she feels hopeless about her ability to make a true difference. Worse than that she once more feels stretched between two worlds with one foot on each side of the schism that is shaking the core of the Order. She wants to offer her love and support to everyone, including those who cannot bear to fight any longer, but her determination to soldier on causes tension between her own convictions and her desire for everyone to be safe. She wants to fight alongside those who are committed to continuing on, but she feels like she would slow them down in a true fight. She is torn and hurting and trying so hard to find the right balance to hold on to what remains of her light and keep going forward.

However, in many ways I believe she still plays an important part in the Order. Fractured and bleeding though she may be she is still a sign of goodness in a dark world and for many I believe that is important just to see her surviving. I could see her role playing out any number of ways. She is able to understand people exceedingly well and could play a part in bringing together the two opposing sides of the Order. She could also end up a martyr if she isn’t careful.

extra.

Snapshot HC’s

Hometown- Shere, Surrey, England

Parents- Florence (nee Wells) and William Burbage

Charity’s late wife- Name: Althea Quinn. Occupation: Environmental scientist/activist Appearance: Brunette w/ green eyes. They met following Charity’s graduation from Hogwarts as Althea spent most of her summers in Ireland. Charity revealed her magic to her on the eve of her marriage proposal to Althea explaining that she didn’t want there to be any dishonesty between herself and the woman she wanted to spend her life with.

Patronus: Hedgehog- “Cute and loveable inside and out, those who possess a hedgehog Patronus may thrive on giving and receiving love and may feel they need more of it than others realize. While upfront about their endearment and affectionate personality, hedgehogs are also known to be anxious and overly cautious. They often worry about their own and others of their kind’s safety. Those around must approach the hedgehog with care and precision, though, because when defensive and hurt, hedgehogs are remembered not for their sweetness, but for their sharp spikes.” “The first impression of an individual with a hedgehog patronus can be very deceiving. On the outside, they can first appear happy-go-lucky and kind, as well as slightly naive. They are optimistic individuals in the way they want to be happy and have the feeling rub off on others, but this is not who they are completely. Rather, they actually have a tough personality to them, and have the ability to fight and defend themselves. Do not take the for weaklings, because they certainly are not, and are much more perceptive than they appear. The most common house for a hedgehog patronus is Hufflepuff. The most common signs are Cancer and Sagittarius.”

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/salexis19/ch-bleeding-light/

Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/emmavanity/playlist/6yJd5ZF9SMj0Rz3MIuILoe?si=IkH6i6Q9Qq24RYF_p486HA

#hp rp #rp #marauders rp #lsrpg #roleplay #accepted

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radiqueer · 6 years ago

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I’ve been trying to figure out how to contribute to the “born this way” conversation, but I’m not fully sure how to articulate my ideas. For me I feel like my identity... like I feel I was “born this way” like I’ve had intermittent dysphoria for as long as I can remember. But also as far as mspec labels go I could ID as pan, or poly, or Omni, but I’ve always felt bi fits and that’s the identity I choose. My partner tho, feels that they, more than anything, chose to be bi (1/2)

My partner feels that they had no inclination towards being anything other than a straight man until well into their thirties, when, due to a lot of factors, they decided any company was good company and decided to see if they liked being with men. They had a good experience, and they feel they could have left it at that but CHOSE to continue to pursue their attraction to men, and then much more recently, in doing their own research about gender identity and being around me (2/3 oops)

They chose to question their gender identity (which as of right now is inconclusive), and my partner feels happy as a bi questioning person, but also felt happy as a straight man and could have remained so but chose to be happy a different way. Idk it’s complicated/messy and I don’t really get it but it’s how my partner feels and I believe them. And then Political lesbianism is a thing. Idk it’s hard for me to wrap my head around I wish I could contribute more. It’s def not one size fits all tho

this makes a ton of sense, thanks for sharing!

I feel like - in a lot of ways, being queer and identifying as queer changed me as a person. it changed everything, from the way I think about and approach new topics, the way I see myself and the world, my politics, my tastes in books and art. queerness is fundamental to me, but I can conceive not being queer. if I didn’t know it was an option to identify this way, if I didn’t grow in a home that encouraged me to question and pursue new avenues, I would be a different person. and I cannot with any certainty say that I would definitely identify as queer at some point, if not at 14 then at 17, 19, 25, 40. I think I am happier for being queer, because it is relieving to share an experience and a community (things which have been difficult for me in the past) with people who love and support me. I like having a voice and an opinion on issues. I like my politics. I don’t like being discriminated against, but who does?

there are so many ways to have a fluid identity. you can be the same person all your life with the same experiences and label yourself differently over time. like your partner. one could be happy in one’s assigned roles but happier in a different set that they sought out and choose (kudos to your partner for keeping an open mind and allowing themselves to be happy in a non-normative way, btw), you can have a fluid identity that changes with time, you can be one thing and identify as another, you can refuse a labels on principle, you can be a political lesbian (or it’s equivalents, I suppose? I don’t know if we have something analogous to political lesbianism in other queer subgroups. I think certain parts of the ace community are the closest we’ve come)

the problem is the idea that there’s only one way to be and feel about queerness and identity and labels. which, IME, is what the BTW crowd seeks to do - normalise us because we are an expression of naturally occurring human diversity. we deserve equality because we are people, just slightly different, and we didn’t choose to be this way any more than you did. it’s not our fault! give us some money! [/s]

people who are written over by this narrative, in no particular order:

questioning people who don’t even know whether they’re straight - they may or may not be

nb people who are often told we are special snowflakes, a symptoms of the excesses of liberal/left wing politics. that we wouldn’t exist if not for the internet [true of me if not for you / ymmv]

bisexual and mspec people

people with fluid identities

people who choose to present a certain way

political [orientation]

people who are choosing to not labels themselves out of fear

people whose identity is informed by trauma

etc

the problem is the dichotomy that seems to be essential to this debate - that you can only have one or the other, that people on one side keep trying to erase the opposing narrative. I frankly don’t know. I’ve only been a part of this debate for a few months and all my thoughts about BTW are informed by personal experience and what I have stumbled across on tumblr. not a comprehensive start by any means. but ime it’s always the BTWs who are trying to shove differing narratives away, and not the choicers. maybe @korrasera and i have different experiences! in fact, I think we have very different experiences

The problem I’m trying to highlight, the whole reason I made this post, is that I’ve never seen someone suggest that only BTW is valid. In fact, the only times I’ve ever seen people discussing BTW was to specifically suggest that we have to do whatever we can to erase it as an idea because they perceive it as being inherently exclusionary, as though the existence of people who were BTW meant that people could not be queer, gay, lesbian, or trans without having been born in that state. I think it’s a reasonable assumption to consider such intentions as being somewhat noble, since they’re meant to criticize and deconstruct social constructs of legitimacy, but I literally never see the topic raised without it being ‘let’s get rid of the idea that BTW people exist, it’s not true and it hurts the cause’.

[emphasis added all mine; taken from this post]

I have a different experience. I’ve seen BTW discussed as the only right way to be, and not only by exclusionists (I wouldn’t be able to find receipts on this - I remade my blog recently, and lost all my likes and the people I was following). even when I talk to people irl, I’m forced to resort to a narrative I don’t have any stake in to get my point across, a narrative that doesn’t help me. it’s frustrating and alienating. and I still don’t think we should do away with BTW. I think we make room for people like me to exist and talk, and define clearly what it means so more people can figure out whether or not they fit.

I read around some while I was writing this post, so here’s some stuff tangential but essential to my thoughts:

this post about the relationship of radfems to what constitutes essential womanhood

this post by the same user about why some people may choose a certain labels

another post by the same user

this post, which possibly everyone has read, but I was thinking about this part (emphasis mine)

My girlfriend Marna has been a queer activist since the late 80s. She’s told me about the incredible deliberation and debates LGBTQ+ activists had, in the late 90s and early 00s as the community began to see past the AIDS crisis and immediate goals of “surviving a plague” and “burying our dead.” There were a lot of things we wanted to achieve, but we had to decide how to allocate our scarce reserves of money, labour, publicity, and public goodwiil. Those were the discussions that decided the next big goals we’d pursue were same-sex marriage equality and legal recognition of medical gender transition.

From hearing her tell it, it seems like it was actually a wrenching decision, because it absolutely left a lot of people in the dust. A lot of people, her included, had broad agendas based on sexual freedom and the rights of people to do whatever they wanted with their bodies and consenting partners—and they agreed to put their broader concerns aside and drill down, very specifically, onto the rights of cis gays and lesbians to marry, and the ability to legally change your sex and gender.

As a political tactic it was terrifically effective. […]

Activists of 20 years ago chose to sideline and diminish efforts to blur and abolish the gender binary. Efforts to promote alternative family structures, including polyamorous families and non-sexual bonds between non-related adults. Efforts to fight the Christian cultural message that sex is dirty, sinful, bad, and in need of containment. Efforts to promote sexual pleasure as a positive good.

I couldn’t tell you why these posts stuck out to me while I was writing this, but they do a better job, by and large, of contextualising what I’ve said here

#sorry for hijacking ur point into a longwinded ramble #it stands pretty damn well on its own #im just rambly #original #born this way

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eyesaremosaics · 6 years ago

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I've followed you for many years. After all the times I've deleted and remade, I still somehow come back to your blog. I dont like or reblog from you much, or at all, in fact. But your energy is so calming. I'm a medium and sometimes it can be draining, but you have such a calm energy. It's like novacane. A pool of black water I can silently float in. Thank you, for sharing a piece of yourself with us on here.

I’m sorry that you find my energy draining, yet I understand that you are most likely referring to my old identity--as a victim/martyr/sacrifice. I have changed much in the last year alone, yet...it is not evident here because I spent much of this year ”living” as opposed to analyzing or philosophizing. I spent this year meditating, exercising, making art, and being present with children. I taught them how to be who they are without presenting themselves as entitled, self serving, need seeking conduits. I teach children how to express their needs in an open direct way, without shame, where they feel free to explore their conscious and subconscious mind without restriction. They channel their curiosity into self exploration that is fair and impartial to others needs and desires.

Children are just small people, if you treat them with a condescending or patronizing tone, and they will respond with rebellion. Children are innocent, but resilient. They recover quickly and process later. Children are the unadulterated impulse to be oneself, they do not judge, they just are, they just do. When a child judges themselves or others, that is an indication of an unhealthy home environment in which they are demonized for their behavior. They judge to take back power, and feel good about themselves, because their core sense of self is fractured.

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That's the message he is sending.” ― Thich Nhat Hanh

This goes back to the idea, that....a person who has dark energy (as I did when you read those posts, and many others struggle with identity, love, purpose etc.) they do not need punishment, shame, rejection...they need help. They need guidance, they need encouragement, inspiration, and above all--love. Love of oneself so you do not doubt everything you say and do, love of others as they are...and not what we wish them to be. Love of animals, children, the elderly, the mentally ill or infirm, to bring in the gentle choice to listen, understand and to love without condition.

My calming energy can be attributed to being an old soul, but more than that, it is my virgo/libra cusp, wanting everything to appear beautiful, ethereal,otherworldly, yet... true, but also poetic and melancholic. My Pisces moon leaves me a dreamer, yet a fatalist at the same time. I both believe in magic, and question its legitimacy. The occult (by definition)--means hidden knowledge. The early alchemists, numerologists, and astronomers, were all searching for universal truth, in a Christian time where intellect was considered “witchcraft”. Isaac Newton’s theory of gravity: Newton's law of universal gravitation states that every mass attracts every other mass in the universe, and the gravitational force between two bodies is proportional to the product of their masses, and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them.

So what goes up, must come down. This was contradictory to the Christian ideology of the time, that god conveniently created all that is. The philosopher reaches the same ontological argument, that we expanded from nothingness, by coincidence for no reason, or we have a divine purpose determined by past lives, bad/good deeds, karma that exploded from nothingness and simply IS etc. No one knows.

Psychology taught me that we project what we either “wish to see”, or “wish to avoid” in our perception of others. That person who gets on your last nerve... is your teacher. They have qualities that you either have (hidden) or had, and their appearance is unacceptable. People do not like to see the ugly truth, they prefer illusions. People take refuge in imagination, or the idea that they have reformed. Being faced with a quality from their past, makes it real, and intolerable. My formerly: dark, energy was a choice in the past. a comfortable result of much suffering, It validated my pain but also gave me more...in a different way. It is hard, and painful to face who you rally are...its just like in the Neverending story...the second mirror reveals your true self. “kind men find that they are cruel, brave men discover they are really cowards. Most run from the mirror--screaming.”

Most people cannot face criticism or failure, valuable tools in life, for resilience and strength. “most people have given up their hopes and dreams. Those without hope, are easy to control, and whoever has the control has the power.”

This rant basically means: i am no longer dark in my emotional interior. I healed that broken part of myself, but I do fear the future, and the state of our world--unrelated to myself. Although I know the individual alone cannot change it, i do know enough people believing in something...gives it meaning. I do believe that there is hope for us as human beings, but it will take radical changes. My energy in spite of my world views, is actually very positive. I delight in simple joys and pleasures, and carry no bitterness, or hatred in my heart.. To me, I love all things. I forgive, and I learn. I am peaceful. Though I understand the aversion to darkness....it comes from the fear of that quality in oneself. we condemn what is in us.

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meditationadvise · 7 years ago

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Psychic Vampires and the Use of Etheric Energy

Vibrating power is just what makes up the presence of whatever in life as well as is commonly referred to as waves of power streaming with deep space. Everybody provides certain vibrational frequencies, which is just what brings in the numerous events that occur in your daily life. Psychic vampires have actually discovered how to offer and manage these frequencies which permit them to continue to be in the form they are in.Energy comes in various shades and also forms as well as every feeling that is produced hands out a certain kind of energy that separates itself from the other kinds created.

Let's discuss power that is produced by favorable actions. For example, developing a favorable emotion in a person by doing something wonderful for the individual is a way to obtain positive energy forming. When you create a favorable feeling in someone, you are permitting the individual you are developing that feeling with, to release positive power which could can be found in the shades of yellows, pinks, oranges, purples, greens, etc. It varies with the individual as well as the positive feeling being really felt. This is the sort of energy you desire to create. While it does take longer and also even more job to create this sort of energy, the cause the future are far more satisfying as well as you will certainly really feel much better physically.

When feeding off the positive power developed, you will certainly feel the favorable emotions of that person you are feeding off of. Exact same goes if you are feeding off the energy provided by points in nature like trees as an example. If you take energy from the tree, give power back to it. When you develop favorable power it is virtually like you are feeding off each other then due to the fact that you are both exuding a favorable area of power as well as in turn you are not developing an unfavorable energy field. When you have this sort of energy, you naturally attract it towards yourself without also trying a lot of time. It additionally makes you feel excellent literally in the sense that you can believe clearer, you are much less prone to coming to be ill, you feel good regarding yourself, and also it makes exchanging power ten times less complicated than it would certainly be if you were to opt to go take the route of producing negative energy in others and in your environment.Another kind of developing energy in order to soak up or feed off of it, is the one stated above, the development of negative energy. This means of developing energy through unfavorable actions or emotions guided at others can be among the fastest and most convenient means to produce and also feed off of power, but it is additionally hazardous to you as well as dangerous to those you are feeding off of. All one needs to perform in order to develop an adverse form of power is start talking with someone in an unfavorable means, such as being contemptuous or speaking with a person like they are a five-year old. When you do that, it creates irritation or even anger in others, and also you can after that take their power promptly as well as create large outcomes by remaining to push that individual's buttons so to say. Starting a battle or a debate with someone produces adverse power results quickly it is very easy to continue disparaging a person if you will. The effects of taking power in this way could cause many manner ins which are pleasurable for some, and not so pleasant for others. If you care in any way regarding other individuals and their feelings or health, you will not perform this sort of feeding of energy from others. It could make you feel ill, and also remember that you ARE soaking up that persons feelings and also sensations also, so if they are depressed, you come to be clinically depressed. The upside is that you renew your power fast, but the drawback is that it decreases fast as well.

Taking energy this way not only can create you to attract a great deal of adverse things right into your life, such as lack of friends or household, or also the inability to work or sustain a relatively regular life, yet it also influences your very own personally mental and physical well-being with its toxins that unfavorable energy has the tendency to carry.For instance, allow's state that you have a friend that you constantly choose on because they are broke all the time (this is simply an instance) and also never ever have loan to do anything. At some point that person you are teasing will start to get on the defensive with you because you are constantly making enjoyable of them. This produces a feeling of anger or aggravation which are both adverse. Now, every single time you are around that individual, they begin releasing an adverse form of energy as opposed to positive emotions as well as power. It is very easy to get someone to release that adverse power area without truly attempting. It's the positive energy area that has a tendency to be an obstacle for a great deal of individuals and as a result, numerous people produce unfavorable energy areas around others.

Not ALL Vampires have to develop some kind of emotion in a person in order to take their power. For several of us it simply comes naturally, while others it takes time and a great deal of practice to find out ways to simply stroll up to somebody and also touch their hand and also take their power without creating a positive or negative feeling in them. While producing favorable or adverse energy in somebody, it just essentially ads to the power a Vampire is already obtaining just by remaining in the presence of someone. It takes a lot of concentration and a significant amount of emphasis to create this type of feeding and also it is best to find out from somebody else who currently understands ways to do this to make sure that it they could direct you along the way to assist you create this skill.It is also feasible to manipulate others power fields to get what you want from them or make them do just what you want them to do in a manner. This is something that again comes naturally to some, as well as for others it is quite the difficulty to master. Once you are able to efficiently discover this technique, it could make life that a lot easier for you and make taking that individual's power even less complex. Some individuals prefer to use this present for their own uses as well as gains while others opt to utilize it to enjoy with individuals or just to be devious.You could as an example focus your energy on someone you might wish to get something from completely free, like at a store or perhaps the movie theater. With this capacity you could encourage people of just about anything and also they will certainly think it, as well as they will do a lot of just what you ask of them. You could attract people in for feeding as well with this ability. Knowing the best ways to use your personal power to take partial control of what others could believe or do is an ability that must not be ignored and also could conveniently fall under the hands of those that opt to use it for their very own dark purposes.

Energy has been used for recovery those that have conditions for hundreds of years by practically every different culture in our world, as well as on other aircrafts of existence. It is the life pressure which keeps whatever creature alive and able to operate on an everyday basis. Without our energy field/aura, we would stop to exist as human beings, in addition to vampires. A vampire could not make it through without an energy field or without replenishing it, equally as anything else in this world.Understanding the energy field and also exactly what influences it as well as the outcomes you will receive by feeding off of certain powers is necessary in knowing the best ways to live and also endure in a reasonably negative energy cost-free way of living for any kind of vampire, deliberate or unintentional.

Types of Energy Vampires-by Dr. Bruce Goldberg

Some individuals, by their actual visibility, seem to drain pipes the energy of those unguarded people around them. They will typically link with a victim that displays the timeless signs of this drain.General debility, absence of motivation and also energy, a skeletal figure, a pallid complexion, and also an overall feeling of weak point are typically noted. These sufferers also tended to be highly suggestible individuals. The dominant companion (energy vampire) constantly withstands an effective therapy, or security, put on their victim.Most of these energy vampires are well-meaning, normal individuals. They are a dissatisfied lot, and do their damage by a telepathic draining of their victim's energy resources. Mere separation of two individuals leads to instant favorable modifications in the sufferer. In my Los Angeles workplace I educate all such victims in the art of spiritual security techniques to eliminate any reoccurrences of this syndrome. Attempt the psychic defense negativity experience on the hypnotic workout web link for your personal protection.I favor to utilize the term 'psychic parasitism' for cases where this energy drainpipe is uncontrolled as well as subconscious. If this result is the outcome of a premeditated psychic assault, I refer to the wrongdoer as a power vampire.You will certainly observe this procedure at job in any kind of public event,. The more people present, the simpler it will certainly be to observe. This could be a household event, a lecture, or an experience at your neighborhood cinema. When I perform workshops and workshops, it is more than noticeable. I discuss this idea as well as quickly see specific heads bobbing up as well as down. Also much more fascinating is the reaction of their partner. These people offer more me several of the nastiest looks I have ever seen. Fear not, I am totally secured as well as am not vulnerable to their parasitism/vampirism.

Psychic Defense Methods Versus Energy Vampires

The emotional characteristics represented by people that inadvertently represent a psychic assailant (power vampire) come under five significant classifications. This individuality kind is a buildup of that individual's experiences in their current life, along with in previous lifetimes.Fear is the common measure in these people, and you have to learn how to protect yourself from their negative impacts. The 5 personality types are called angelic, insecure, paranoid, passive-aggressive, as well as robotic.

The Paranoid Type

Betrayal is the main concern with a paranoid kind. Their karmic style in previous lives has actually possibly been that of warrior-like habits, self-sacrifice, and also success in their battles. As an outcomes of their experiences, they discovered that there were adversaries worldwide that betrayed as well as perhaps killed them in numerous incarnations.Paranoid kinds are soldiers still attempting to win a battle that not exists against an opponent that has long because perished. They do not trust any person. Everybody is their adversary and also life is their battlefield. Worry is anywhere and an embedded part of their individuality makeup.

Their power areas have a tendency to be more extremely charged on the upper half of their body. They are especially fearful and also distrustful of participants of the opposite sex. Hostility is one of the most typical feedback to the world from a paranoid kind. This aggressiveness takes the kind of physical actions as well as energy estimates to anybody in their path.Paranoid kinds regularly select battles. They are seductive, however are incapable of long-lasting connections. He or she anticipates all others to betray them, and also will aid in establishing up others for this dishonesty. A paranoid may launch a dishonesty as a preemptory strike.

To lose for a paranoid is to admit that they misbehave. This is excruciating, so these people need to win regardless. They are hard employees, obsessive-compulsive, and also are normally quite healthy literally. There is never adequate time for them to accomplish their different goals.Paranoid types urge you concur with their often-distorted view of the globe. In truth, they desire you to suggest with them. This method they could win the argument and verify to themselves that they ready and also you are bad.

Never argue with this individual. Avoid making eye contact with them. Reduced and also soften your voice when you talk to them, as well as change the subject to something pleasant.

The Ethereal Type

Existential horror is the primary problem of an angelic kind. Frequently these struggling hearts have been hurt to fatality in previous lives for their metaphysical beliefs or practices. Their only getaway was to leave the body, so out-of-body experiences are the standard with them today.

These individuals do not desire much contact with others. They hesitated to incarnate in their existing body, and also reveal this fear by being reluctant to dedicate their awareness entirely into their physical body.Leaving their physical body frequently throughout the day is one of the most typical technique that aerial kinds use to deal with issues. They have weak borders as well as invest as much time as feasible on the spiritual realms. Since all time is synchronised on other planes, these people find it difficult to relate to direct time.The result of these dispositions is both withdrawal as well as aggression. They end up being aggressive as well as upset when required to operate on the earth plane. Their psychic attack on you is seldom deliberate, yet however you should secure yourself from these individuals.

The Insecure Type

The primary problem with troubled kinds is nurturance. These hearts have been via many versions during which there merely was inadequate food or love to walk around. They typically were abandoned at some time in their existing life, and fear it will take place again.

The insecure type feels that everyone around them is draining their energy, their feedback is to suck the energy from others to compensate. They might involve you in long, boring conversations and also speak really gently. Their voice is so soft and low that you need to strain to hear them. These are uncontrollable individuals who are characteristically obese and also at risk to dependencies of all kinds.

These souls consistently produce life experience showing that they are not worthwhile of focus, as well as their power needs and also nurturing requirements will never ever be satisfied. To fix this shortage, they must continue draining the power from others, producing a ferocious cycle.An insecure kind always encounters as defenseless. They urge you do things for them, as well as anticipate you to care for their every need. Give-and-take scenarios are unidentified to them. All they could do is take.Never stand directly before this individual. Do not make eye contact with them, when possible. Motivate them with words, yet do not provide to do things for them. Remember these individuals reside in continuous concern of being rejected as well as desertion. Do not let your pity for them be a basis for you being their next victim.

The Passive-Aggressive Type

Invasion and also being regulated is the chief problem of the passive-aggressive kind. During a number of previous incarnations, they experienced being regulated as well as trapped in situations, as well as protected against from being able to reveal themselves in ways they intended to. They may have been slaves, prisoners, or been taken advantage of by faith or governments.These hearts absolutely desire liberty, yet their concern stops them from asserting it. They are upset as well as resentful for not doing not hesitate, and lack an option to this issue. Their reaction to the globe is withdrawal, but with a subconscious wish to obtain authorization from other people to find back right into the world.

Passive-aggressive types lack autonomy. They constantly make every effort to include various other individuals in their lives. This specific makes needs and also resists input at the same time. They stay in the now, as well as never strategy or assume regarding the future. Self-expression is unknown to them. It is typical to observe others hindering their advancement, completing their sentences, and taking them for granted.This kind of private produces an inner globe of unclear, uniform fantasies as well as concepts, with anxiety at the core of this world. They imprison themselves as well as project loneliness, despair, as well as resentment toward everybody they call. It is difficult for them to reveal anger.

When you involve this kind in a discussion, they will certainly request your advice. All of your suggestions are incorrect and also you are of no assistance to them. These people ask but reject whatever is supplied to them. Their classic action to your guidance is, 'yes.'

The Robot Type

The main concern of robot types is authenticity. They are rejecting their real self. During previous lifetimes, they had to maintain up the look of being perfect in order to survive. They were probably accountable of running things, as they most likely are now.Their external world is ideal, the inner globe is refuted, and there is no core significance. They continuously are afraid that something is missing out on as well as life is proceeding without them.

To manage this fact, robotic types attempt to come to be a lot more excellent. They have high-paying tasks, a good online reputation, a perfect spouse and family members, and also search in perfect health.The a lot more inauthentic they act, the more worthless the world shows up. Others envy their lifestyle. People involve them with their troubles. The robot kinds never ever achieve fulfillment from life, and discover as a blank. They work as if on automatic pilot and are often removed from your conversation.Robot kinds never grumble about the world. They are ideal and also everything is attractive. Appropriateness and also being 'political views bias-free' are more vital that being real.These 5 sorts of psychic parasites have to be recognized as well as dealt with appropriately, or a psychic attack after you is inevitable.Here are a couple interesting articles I discovered in addition to a pair video clips. Take pleasure in!

Psychic Vampires & Spiritual Energy Vampires - How you can remain Immune

youtube

Youtube: Taking Care Of Power Vampires

#christian meditation #meditation #meditation quotes #spiritual #spiritual energy

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liikeglitterandgcld · 6 years ago

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CHARACTER MEME !

FULL NAME Velvet Crowe

GENDER, SEXUALITY Female; Bisexual

ETHNICITY, SPECIES Daemon, Therion—Formerly human

BIRTHPLACE, BIRTHDATE The Village of Aball, Eastgand, July 26th

GUILTY PLEASURES Velvet is hardass. Plain and simple. She’s a hard to get to know, let alone talk to, but once she lets down her guard, Velvet has a soft spot for flowers, dogs, someone with a knack of puns (even if she says she hates them), in general sweet gestures like making coffee or tea for her.

PHOBIAS Does abandonment count as a phobia? Well if so.... Loneliness through abandonment—regardless real or imaginary with her overthinking. Dying without fulfilling her ambitions. Not sure if this counts as a phobia as well, but she has stage fright.

WHAT THEY WOULD BE INFAMOUS FOR She’s earned a reputation, given rather, the title of “Lord of Calamity”— the unholy, the ugliness of human emotions, how dangerous human emotions are. Someone who seeks to destroy homes and cities, leaving them in ruins. Leaving a mount of dead bodies—be it human or daemon in her wake. A daemon with the ability to eat other daemons.

WHAT WOULD / HAVE THEY GOTTEN ARRESTED FOR Her existence as a daemon alone is enough to have be thrown in prison for 3 years. On top of inciting a prison riot, breaking out of prison, kidnapping, multiple counts of murder, destruction of property. Arson. She even ruined a town’s economy by destroying their trade. There’s probably a few more I’m missing

CHARACTER YOU SHIP THEM WITH Within her own canon? Eizen and Magilou. I absolutely adore EiVel/Veizen, probably more than MagiVel. Both ships show different sides of Velvet and have different dynamics with her and I LOVE that.

As far as my own muses + muses I would like to see play out because of dynamics and history be platonic OR romantic.... You have DM me if you’re curious (*≧艸≦) But I will say that I’m a sucker of two broken people coming together and becoming whole. All of Velvet’s ships be it canon or crossover reflect that to some degree

shut up I found my shipping trope

CHARACTER MOST LIKELY TO MURDER THEM If she hasn’t killed herself first by thrusting herself into death’s grip first? Out of my muses......... Noctis probably? If Velvet hasn’t tried to devour him like she would a daemon. Either Noctis or Ruby Rose from my muses. Ormy AU Eva Sparda for a entirely different reason...........

FAVORITE BOOK GENRE Something informative and useful, like cookbook. Outside of that, just give her recommendation. probably some sort of contemporary novels. She likes multiple genres in novels as opposed to focusing one genre in particular. Fantasy elements she tends to like, and usually those go hand in hand in adventure/exploration settings. Types of mystery tend to hold her attention as well.

LEAST FAVORITE BOOK CLICHÉ Velvet hates the idea someone needing to change who they are in order to find love. Romance novels tend to bore her anyway. She’ll read it once if it was okay, but if a book has someone who changes themselves just for someone to love them will. That’s will be in the trash.

TALENTS OR POWERS - Velvet’s main ability is from her left arm—her daemon arm. She can devour basically almost anything (almost as in she has standards). Daemons, humans, or Malakhim/Seraphim— it doesn’t matter. She’ll eat anyone that gets in her way I won’t lie, it is akin to cannib/alism of sorts, especially during her cutscenes regarding her traumatic nightmares. Another important is that Velvet can absorb a being’s malevolence* (mass of negative emotion) into herself.

Another important aspect of her daemon arm is that Velvet can absorb magical attacks. Say a fireball flung at her. She can absorb it and toss back at back. Or—in terms on gameplay—can create certain types of attacks based off the type of daemon and hit their weaknesses (it’s that hard to translate in an rp or in a fanfictions setting to be truthful)

Velvet is also incredibly acrobatic. While she is proficient and professionally taught to use a one handed sword, she prefers using martial art(e)s with heavy focus on her legs and feet as most of her attacks (aided by boot blades). She’s a mix of professionally taught and self taught in her style of fighting with use of her gauntlet blade and hidden boot blades compliment her style.

WHY SOMEONE MIGHT LOVE THEM While Velvet is hard person to befriend, let alone talk to, she is incredibly caring person. Not to the point of doting. She prefers not to let that show often as part of her reflection that’s a daemon, a monster. Let’s be real, anyone who falls in love with her and genuinely cares about her is foolish person not to mention reckless. Which is she herself but regardless. The more they can get Velvet with her guard down the more her humanity shows—if someone she cares is injured by their recklessness, she’ll angry because she’ll be worried about them. She’s goal driven and ambitious.

Velvet doesn’t take bullshit and stubborn, which is both a positive and negative. She can blunt with her words—as a means to encouragement and not to do things without regrets. Synergy on the battlefield, if one keeps up with her. And, her cooking. Not saying that is not the only reason why someone might love them, but it’s a nice bonus. She also gets flustered when embarrassed.

WHY SOMEONE MIGHT HATE THEM I mentioned this already, but Velvet is a closed off person. She is not easy to befriend. She’s is incredibly stubborn person, she’ll headbutt with people on their views and opinions that close to home to her. Not only is she selfish, Velvet IS without a doubt, self absorbed, mostly due to her one track mind of her goals. She has no problem with killing people—be it people who stood against her or as an act of mercy. Velvet gives 0 fucks if you hate her or dislike her. In her mind, that’s their problem, not hers. She’ can be seen as callous and heartless because of that.

For someone who IS a daemon, she feels emotions deeply and strongly. And because of that, arguments and clashes are bound to happen.

HOW THEY CHANGE - Spoilers for Tales of Berseria

Before finding out who Innominat was and how exactly the therions were connected, Velvet had one track of mind of vengeance, against the man she had once called family. There’s a chunk where the game doesn’t sugar coat that Velvet is a terrible person, but there moments where’s parts of herself, the loving sister, that she locked away emerge bit by bit as Laphicet traveled with her. But the more there closing in on the reveal, the more obvious Velvet is completely focused on her goal, the obvious how broken is she and that the only thing driving her will to live is by killing this man who is basically the game’s version of the pope.

After the reveal, Velvet is a broken mess, lashing out. Everything she’s done in was in her brother’s name, her only reason to stay alive during those 3 years in prison fighting daemons day in and day out. And it was for nothing. Every single thing. Before Velvet basically tries to sacrifice herself which??? she’s basically trying to commit suicide essentially?? Laphicet, this tiny malak boy that had befriended her and the others, that slowly started becoming his own person and free will, (and by extension Eizen) tells her to snap out of her and that he’ll always be there for her. After that Velvet starts admitting to herself that her actions, her motivations was for herself and using her brother as an excuse (there’s some truth it is for her brother but its more for her than anyone else). Velvet also starts to mellow out. She’s still a terrible person but has more chill.

WHY YOU LOVE THEM Velvet is a terrible person. She is.. Anyone who’s played tob knows this. She’s starts out as this villainous person (she still is in what the game’s militant church views her.) As the game goes on, she becomes an anti-hero. The game doesnt sugar coat that she’s done some terrible things all for the sake of revenge. She is this hardened person who’s cynical, jaded, and unbeliveably bitter. Yet deep down she’s a good person,who cares deeply and strongly for those she loves and cares for.

Another spoiler but! There’s a point where if she doesn’t stop to reserve the effects her brother in law cleansing, the world is fucked basically. But she doesn’t do that for humanity’s sake. She does so out of responsibility—this is her family and she’s the only one capable of stopping him and his god— and because of her goal. She’s committed to her goal of killing him. Helping save the world meant little to her and was a beneficial side effect of her actions. ToB has its own share of flaws but it shines it shines brights.

tagged by: @e0nian [ thank you ♥ i took so long to figure out who i wanted to use for the meme

tagging: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ steal it if you want

#( ✕ — cosmic oddities | headcanons )#♔— all in the details || headcanons ( velvet )#I love velvet with all my heart #i cant articulate how much i love her and her character arc #tob spoilers #tales of berseria spoilers

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