#and either dock it from the price or pay for it after the sale

[phoenshire]

flops over

the living room now looks better than it did the day i moved in

[characcoon]

The Way of Business

Words: 2143

Summary: How Donnie first met Charles. 

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"I'm trying my best to not question, but… "Cat claws, be sure they fell naturally" and he wrote the last word with capital bold letters." Donnie pokes the shopping list with his finger "And my favorite, "Coffee beans (digested)", which, by other terms, means coffee that has been shat."

"Keep not questioning." April says, hands on her pockets "It's witchy, magic stuff. We already went through this, Dee. Sometimes it doesn't make sense and that's fine."

"I'm aware. But it's not everyday you have poop coffee on your grocery list. What's he even going to do with these?"

"I don't think that anything Barry does should be our business."

April and Donnie walk around a busy street in the shopping district of the Hidden City, trying to identify the things on Draxum's list only by looking at the shops and vending stands, since the old sheep Yokai didn't think of writing where exactly to find the stuff.

"Maybe it's a cake." Donnie mumbles, stopping by a counter and quickly examining some items "Mikey's been teaching him some more recipies, he might be returning the favor by making Yokai food."

"Pooped coffee cat claws cake! Yummy." April gags, then points at a jar filled with sparkly deep blue glitter labelled mermaid bone powder "I think we need that one."

They continue shopping for another 20 minutes until they reach a part of the district that is definitely more shady and quiet. Sales are made among whispers and the shops have much less products on display, everything of importance stocked in the back. 

As April intimidates a merchant to lower the price of the cat claws, Donnie spots something familiar in a corner and curiously turns around to look. It's one of Big Mama's guards, but not just any guard; it's that specific one that seems to be on a higher rank, that was at the scene when the spider Yokai first took the Shredder to make him her champion. Donnie hums, watching as the guard dives between two stores and vanishes into another street.

"Got it for half the price." April comes to him, smiling proudly and shaking a tiny bottle filled with cat claws, then notices Donnie isn't paying attention "Earth to Donnie?"

"Wanna put some noses where they don't belong?" He sends her a trickster smile, bumping his fingers together.

"That depends, are you going to explode the whole street again?"

"Scoff!" the turtle scoffs "I saw one of Big Mama's guards going that way."

"And we need to go after them because…"

"Because it's her personal guard. The personal, stealthy, silent guard. The guard she sends to kill people without leaving a trace. The guard that probably has a cool name that makes people shiver in fear upon hearing it. The guard I just saw going that way."

April puffs her cheeks and blows out air in sections, a thoughtful expression on her face. Then she sighs, puts the bottle on Donnie's hand and starts walking.

"Alright, let's seek trouble, why not."

Donnie silently celebrates and dashes across the street, April right on his tail, following the same path of the guard. They go between the stores and find themselves in a smaller street with much less stores that are much more shady, to the point of being just holes between the brick walls. They reach the end of the street, turn to the only side available into another short road that hits a dead end. The guard is on that far end, with their back to the two curious teens who are slowly and quietly getting closer by using the little things around that can be used as barricades.

“We could make business faster if you tell me what you want straight up, I don’t do well with riddles.”

Donnie peaks behind a depression in the wall he and April are hiding in and notices a big trashcan shoved inside the wall with some christmas lights dangling from the sides and some mechanisms bending the lid and forming a roof. The guard is in front of whoever’s speaking, neither Donnie or April can see who.

“Or you could send the Great Milf here personally! Would love to catch up with her, if you know what I mean.”

Donnie gags in silence.

“She wants the Barnacle.” the guard speaks, voice muffled and distorted.

“The Barnacle! Wow! And why would I have that, exactly?”

“You were seen with it, at the docks. Took the package from Captain Piel.”

“Stupid lump of rotten flesh ratted me out, huh.” the other mumbles and sighs “Alright, I’ll get it, gimme a minute.”

April and Donnie glance at each as they hear ruffling and some crashing, the immovable form of the guard giving no indication of noticing the eavesdropping happening behind them.

“Is she gonna pay me at least?” the guard doesn’t answer “Y’know, in my land we have this saying. Quem cala consente. It means “silence means yes”, so I’m expecting some good cash unless you say words. No? Nothing? Talking to a door is funnier than talking to you.”

“The Barnacle, Charles.”

With a flicker of their wrist, a kunai appears between the fingers of the guard. Donnie instinctively moves his arm to his back, near his staff, and April gets into a better position to either fight or run.

“Is that handle made of Calligraphy Stone?” the merchant, possibly named Charles, speaks with excitement “Oh, damn, how much do you want for that?”

“Not for sale.”

“Oh, c’mon, it’s Calligraphy Stone!”

“Not for sale.”

“You’re boring. Y’know that? Boring. Wanna know what’s for sale? The Barnacle inside this box, this pretty doormat I made this morning and this GUN!”

A loud bang can be heard and the guard violently flies backwards, a blast of light illuminating the whole street. The guard smacks hard on the floor, smoke coming out of their chest, unmoving. Charles can now be seen; it’s a raccoon, very short, doesn’t go past Donnie’s knees. His tail is pink and orange, he wears duffle bags strapped to both sides of his hips, metal bracelets taking both his entire forearms and a gray sleeveless hoodie. On his face, big steampunk goggles and a wide, manic grin. On his hands, a gun definitely made out of garbage and nonsense, reminiscent of a grenade launcher, bigger than his whole body.

“I lied! The gun is not for sale!” he laughs and points the gun to the guard again “Now scram before I blast you into pieces!”

April notices the guard starting to move first, but doesn’t have time to warn everyone; they’re up and running in a second, blade slicing where Charles’ standing. The raccoon hops above the slash, smacks the guard in the head with the gun and drops it, then dashes towards the exit, but takes a sharp turn and bumps into the two teens. Before any of them can make any noise, he removes a disk from one of his bags, puts it on the floor and clicks. A translucent green wall blinks for a second before going orange. Donnie opens his mouth to speak, but the raccoon turns and shushes him so hard he even forgets what he was going to say. April goes equally quiet.

The guard finds his footing again after the blow and walks a few quick steps to the exit of the road, stopping right in front of the hideout of the other three. Charles silently clicks on his bracelets and long, sharp claws form as gauntlets on his hands and he gets into position, fur standing up, body tense and ready. Donnie’s breath gets caught on his throat when the guard swiftly turns their head and locks eyes with him, even knowing that the disk on the ground is some sort of cloaking tech making them all invisible.

The guard stands down, turns to the end of the road and walks back to the trashcan. They’re after the Barnacle, after all. Before they can reach it, however, the raccoon takes a small switch from his pocket and clicks on a button. The lid of the trashcan slaps close with a car alarm noise and the entire thing, wall included, poofs out of existence.

The road, not a dead end anymore, extends back to the one Donnie and April were previously on. Passersby and merchants turn to look at the wall that vanished and the guard just standing there, hand stretched to grasp nothing. Their stance slowly becomes neutral and it takes another minute for them to go away as a blur of movement.

Only then Charles snorts, so sudden and loud that Donnie jumps away from him.

“Idiot.” he continues laughing, disengaging his gauntlets and the cloaking device.

“That was so cool!” April speaks up “You played them so hard!”

“Yeah, I-” his ears go up and he flinches, remembering there were other people there too. “GUN!”

He turns around with two properly sized guns on each hand, pointing one to each of them. Donnie shows his hands and April smiles.

“You’re a human.” he shakes a gun at April “The hell you doing down here?”

“Shopping.”

“And the mecha-frog?”

“Frog?!” Donnie makes an offended expression and scoffs “Frog!”

“Are you a pokemon, only speaks your own name?”

“Wh- no! I’m a turtle!”

“Be nice, Dee. This dude’s super cool. And has a gun pointed at your face.”

“You should listen to the lady, Dee.”

“My name is Donnie.”

“Okay, Donnie Dee.” Charles opens his hands and his guns turn into liquid metal that surround his arms and turn back into being bracelets “I gotta go now. See ya around.”

He pulls the same switch he used to make the wall disappear and opens a side panel.

“Wait, you sell stuff, don’t you?” April takes Draxum’s list from Donnie “Do you have crystallized coral?”

“I do, yeah. But the shop’s all the way up to the surface now, so you should finish everything you have to do down here first. Y’know, time efficiency.”

“We are done here, right?” Donnie asks and analyzes the list “If you have the coral, digested coffee beans and petrified wood. Did we get the owl feathers?”

“We did.” April answers.

“Then.” he turns to the raccoon “Do you have those other three items?”

“100%.” Charles smiles “Hold onto me and we can warp there, pronto.”

Charles extends one hand to them and they grab one finger each, April making a squeaky noise. He clicks on his switch and they all teleport away.

Donnie recognizes the street they appear on, it’s not too far from the Lair. The trashcan store shoved into the wall is there, creating another dead end that he’s sure didn’t exist before. Charles rushes to it, opens the lid and jumps inside, sighing in relief.

“Alright, let’s get to business. Coral, wood, coffee. Talking about coffee, would you like some to drink? I always have one jar ready.”

“It’s not digested, right?” Donnie makes a face.

“No, it’s black coffee. From the store. Completely normal, I assure you.”

Donnie asks for a cup and the raccoon serves him, then asks which street they’re on. The turtle answers, gets a thanks and watches as the small merchant goes around opening drawers and boxes.

“What’s the Barnacle?” Donnie asks “And why would Big Mama want it?”

“It’s an invisible creature.” Charles answers, putting one big box with crystal coral by the counter “A plague. Sticks to the boats and sucks out life force to grow bigger. When a ghost ship is found and they can’t find out why everyone’s dead, they blame the Barnacle. 80% of the time they’re right.” another box, with petrified wood balls “And I think you can guess why Big Mama wants it. The damn thing might have a preference for boats, but it can stick to any wood structure.”

And finally, a bag of digested coffee beans.

“Pick as many of these as you need.” he points to the coral and wood “Only have this bag of coffee for sale. Stupid spider shut down more of my contacts.”

“You two seem to have some history” April starts to collect some wood balls.

“Oh, dear, if only you knew.” the raccoon laughs “You gotta keep a hold of the competition. It’s how business go.”

After taking the necessary quantity and paying, they say their farewells. Charles slides two business cards to them before they leave.

Quinquilharias, the card says, with a resume of the services and products in the back of it. Donnie hums as he reads it, considering returning more times soon, since it’s so close to the Lair and he’s the most charismatic merchant he’s ever met. And his coffee is decent enough.

And of course, he would be lying if he says he’s not curious about what’s his deal with Big Mama.

[jonathananubian]

Te Dralyc Kar Ch 6 [Star Wars Fanfic]

Synopsis:

Jango isn’t quite sure how he came to adopt a blonde slave boy after a job on Tatooine went sideways, but he honestly couldn’t complain. The boy is a little genius, brimming with compassion and a willingness to learn. The only hiccup, as far as Jango is concerned, is the fact that his boy is a naturally powerful force user. Someone the jetii would want to get their hands on.

Of course- he’d just like to see them try.

[This story isn’t linear. More like a series of snapshots. At least until later chapters.]

Chapter 6: Haran

In his secure base on Rorak 4 the red Nikto lounged inside his luxury apartment. The new shipment was already being processed and he could already envision the wealth of credits he’d be swimming in once the sale went through. Sipping at the alcoholic beverage in his hand he leered over the datapad at some of the merchandise. Opening a channel he called down to the guards and ordered them to bring him a specific product from the new shipment. A thrill of anticipation ran through him as he waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Calling down again he cursed at the guards and demanded to know what was taking so long. But there was no response, only static. An explosion rocked the very foundation of his base and K’tharsin cursed vehemently as he flicked through different channels, trying to contact any of his guards. No one was responding.

Behind him the door to his expensive apartment blew off its hinges and he scrambled toward the panic room he’d had built into the place since day one. From the smoke and haze of debris a whipcord zipped through the air and latched onto his leg. The owner of the whipcord grabbed the end and yanked, hard, slamming the red Nikto into the ground with enough force to daze him.

Storming into the room, fierce like a stalking predator, was a Mandalorian in silver armor with a blue flight suit. Terror swamped K’tharsin as he immediately recognized the famed bounty hunter. “Wait! Please! I-I’ll pay you double whatever the price on my head is!” The Mandalorian stopped, black visor staring down at him coldly. Before he could even think to offer more credits two blaster bolts seared into his skull and three more through his torso.

“Who said anything about credits?” Jango said to no one as he untied his whipcord, turned on his heel, and left the dead Nikto behind.

[Shiona]

Helping Maav load more of the kids into the transport the purple Twi’lek felt her stomach roil in disgust and chest burn with rage. When Jango had come out of nowhere, asking for a favor, she’d punched him in the side of the head before hugging the daylights out of him. They’d heard tales there was a possibility he was alive and had learned about the bounty hunter sharing the name of their lost Mand’alor but hadn’t wanted to believe, in case it was just some trick to draw them out of hiding.

What she learned of the aftermath of Galidraan set her blood to boiling. Now, after years of thinking their king was dead, he returned asking for a favor? There had to be a pretty damn good reason for it.

Lo and behold there was, and his name was Anakin.

The picture Jango showed her was one that had been taken by someone else, a candid shot if ever she’d seen one. The blonde was sitting on Jango’s lap holding up a little flag with a racing logo on it, a wide grin on his face and eyes sparkling with joy. The gentle smile on Jango’s face as he watched his son was enough to make Shiona’s heart melt. It was obvious how much he cared for the boy.

So when he explained that someone had nearly kidnapped him to put him back into slavery, that the one responsible was purposefully targeting kids to sell, she gathered a few of the Haat Mando’ade she’d kept in contact with and got them in on the raid. When they learned they were saving kids from slavery none of them even asked if their was a contract or reward. Kids were precious, regardless of whose kids they were. Not to mention the inherent disgust at slavery in general.

Their reaction to Jango had been a mixed bag of joy, grief, anger, and disbelief but in the end they all accepted that he was, in fact, the Mand’alor- and that their Mand’alor was calling them to action.

No one cared that it was out of revenge for messing with Jango’s son. No one cared that they had been divided for years after Jango’s reported death. The Haat Mando’ade weren’t going to sit back when someone was dealing in kids. Especially if they’d attempted to try and snatch the Mand’alor’s son. That was a very deep and personal offense none of them were about to let slide.

“That’s the last of them, Captain. We’ll meet you at the rendezvous and head toward our destination from there. Safe travels.” Shiona waved the man on and got back into her ship. Maav, seeing she had things well in hand, quickly headed to the cockpit to start up the ship.

“Captain, got a present for you.” Catching the datachip out of the air she looked it over then raised a brow at Zermot, their most talented slicer.

“What’s this?” The man grinned at her.

“Proof.” Her eyebrows rose and she eyed the man curiously.

“Proof of what?” She asked him, fondly exasperated.

“Of why you shouldn’t mess with Mando’ade.” He paused. “And that Jango’s back. Our comrades are going to want proof.” She nodded and slipped the datachip into one of her waist pouches. She knew just the person she could send a copy of whatever Zermot had cooked up.

[Roz]

Watching the scene play out again the pink Toydarian chuckled with dark amusement. Trust Jango to take his revenge in the most daring, competent, and vicious raid anyone had seen in years. It was a neat military operation the likes of which could only be accomplished by a tactical mind and a trained mercenary force. The bounty hunting guilds couldn’t even fault him for it, either. Not only was he freeing enslaved children, which no respectable guild would dare disagree with, but the organization had tried to steal his own child. Roz knew the guild would look the other way on the matter.

“What’s so funny ba’vodu?” Clicking off the video she smiled at the blonde head that was peeking into the room, smudges of grease across a pale forehead and nose.

“Nothing, sweetheart. Just a silly video a friend sent me.” Anakin’s nose scrunched up as he scrutinized her and she smiled. “What are you working on now? I hope you didn’t take apart one of my expensive appliances again without asking.” Blue eyes went wide and darted toward whatever it was before coming back to rest on her.

“Uh… naas. Dar’baati, ba’vodu.” ‘Nothing. Don’t worry, auntie.’ Roz let out a sigh. Jango was going to have to teach the boy how to lie better, he was absolutely abysmal at it. Especially since he always slipped into Mando’a whenever he tried. It was a dead giveaway for anyone who knew him.

“Anakin.” She said sternly. The boy blushed and chewed on his bottom lip.

“Okay, but… you looked really busy and I actually know how to fix it this time! It was leaking anyway and I thought it would be nice to do something for you…” She wanted to be cross with him, she really did, but she just couldn’t bring herself to be. Not when he was trying so earnestly to do something nice for her.

“Fine, I’ll overlook it this time. As long as there’s no mess and it actually works when you’re finished.” A smile like a sunrise crossed his face and he was quickly nodding.

“Lek ba’vodu!” ‘Okay auntie!’ Roz sighed as the boy darted off, he was always so full of energy it was a wonder Jango could keep up with him. She honestly never thought she’d learn to speak Mando’a either and yet here she was helping a little Mandalorian child to learn his basic letters and how to hold simple conversations. It was something she knew Jango had once thought to leave behind him, to keep to himself and never speak about with her, but his son just had a way of bringing hope and light to everything he touched… except for her washing machine. That poor thing looked like it someone had stuffed a frag grenade inside by the time Anakin had finished with it and tried to turn it on.

The comm on her desk chimed and she flew over to answer. “Yes? What is it?” There was a request for docking from five ships, none of them with familiar transponder codes and all of them clearly of Mandalorian make. Roz smiled and granted them access. She had no doubt that Jango wouldn’t be far behind.

“Anakin!” She called. The boy came running into the room, wiping his hands on a greasy rag.

“Yes auntie?” Landing beside him she smiled and ruffled his hair, which made him pout.

“Go get cleaned up, quickly. There are some guests in the hangar and your buir should be right behind them.” Anakin whooped and ran off to get cleaned up, leaving Roz to smile warmly at his retreating back.

[Anakin]

Once he was properly washed and changed into the nice tunics his buir had bought him he followed Auntie Roz to the docks, feeling as if he was going to explode with excitement and joy. He was so happy that his buir was back and if he wasn’t heading straight for the medics it meant he wasn’t hurt! Anakin preferred when his buir came home in one piece, since he hated to see him hurt. It reminded him too much of the last time he saw his mom and then he got all sad and anxious…

When they reached the docks his buir was standing with a group of people, although Anakin didn’t really pay them any mind. He wanted to make sure his buir was there, real and whole. Running as fast as he could, ducking around the workers and other guests, he barreled right into his buir’s side, clinging to him as if he could be taken away at any moment. “Su’cuy buir!” ‘Hi dad!’ His buir let out a chuckle and pried him off, making him pout, before he was being lifted into the man’s arms for a proper hug.

All the conversation stopped and he could feel the curious eyes of the people his dad had been talking to. “Anade, ner ad Anakin.” ‘Everyone, my son Anakin.’ Smiling he waved at the group of armored individuals, staring at their armor in open curiosity and awe. “Anakin, anade.” ‘Anakin, everyone.’ Jango made a few hand motions that Anakin didn’t yet understand, since his buir said he needed to learn Mando’a before he could learn the Tigaan, or Mandalorian Hand Signs. After a moment of hesitation the other Mandalorians removed their helmets, except for one of them. They made a few small hand gestures at at his dad, who nodded respectfully back. The last Mandalorian kept their helmet on.

“Su’cuy gar, anade!” ‘Hello, everybody!’ Anakin said with a wide grin, happy that he could talk to them in Mando’a at least. The first Mandalorian, a purple Twi’lek, smiled at him.

“It’s nice to meet you, An’ika. Your buir told us all about you.” Anakin looked at his dad, eyes wide. His dad just chuckled and ran a hand through his hair to soothe his sudden embarrassment.

“Mand’alor, I’m sorry to interrupt but we need to talk about the ade.” His buir frowned and he could feel his mood turn from content/amused/joy to rage/sadness/determination. Flinching back slightly he looked the man in the eyes for a moment before giving him another hug.

“What are they talking about, buir?” Jango hugged him back, arms protective rather than smothering.

“Remember the hut’uune that took you?” Anakin nodded solemnly, his eyes going hard at the memory. “They took other kids too. We went to rescue them.” Anakin’s eyes widened and he began to shake slightly as he gripped his buir’s armor.

“D-did they have chips too? Can I go see them?” Buir felt hesitant and defensive in the force but his expression became calm and contemplative so he stayed still, almost wanting to hold his breath waiting for the answer.

“You can come with me to see them. But if I think you’re in danger and I tell you to go you will listen to me, An’ika. Tion suvarir?” Yes, he nodded, he understood. Buir set him down and took of his helmet, clipping it to his belt before taking Anakin’s hand.

They had some former slave children to help and Anakin would do his best to make them understand that Mandalorians were nothing to be afraid of. Mando'a Translations; Hut'uune- Cowards Tion suvarir?- Understand?

[verdandir]

An Ill-Fated Comb

Picking up the comb she turned it over in her hands and pursed her lips, debating on the necessity of the object while the shopkeep hovered behind the counter, just barely keeping large hands from rubbing together at the idea of a sale. She tapped the little device and set it back down, oblivious to the slight droop in the shopkeep’s shoulders as she turned away, her silver-white eyes drifting across the stall’s contents. She didn’t want to encumber herself overly much when she planned to travel again soon. 

Verdandir reached forward towards a brush when she was jostled roughly from behind, her tiny frame almost completely bowled off her feet as she tried to keep from knocking any of the wares from the stall or end up under the boots of the others in the market. The hovering shopkeep squawked a cry of concern, partly for his wares then for a possible client, and the offender pivoted in place as they attempted to recover from whatever had sent them off course.

“Here now, wha’s this?!”

“Mind th’ lady, there!”

“Oh, excuse me!”

Ungentle hands grasped her shoulders as she grabbed the edge of the stall’s table and she instinctively tried to pull away, glancing up. There was a towering Elezen in traveling leathers next to her, his weathered face pinched with annoyance as he glanced over at a hyur who was by his shoulder.

“I told you to watch your footing around here, Nakim. Now look, we’ve upset a lady,” his tone was just vaguely Ishgardian, as if he had been raised near there yet ended up around other accents or dialects long enough that it was now muddled… but she could catch it. She could always catch that accent. It made her entire body clench even if she tried to fight it. “Please pardon me and my clumsy friend, little lady, we did not mean to-”

The Elezen man’s voice trailed off as he turned and looked at her properly, his eyes locking onto her and squinting. A russet eyebrow rose. Ver blinked and tried to twitch her shoulder out from under his hand, tensing up further as she felt his fingers tighten, resisting her attempt to shake him off. “Um. Y..yes, I’m sure it was just an accident,” Verdandir glanced at the man’s hands and again tried to pull herself away. “I’m fine now.”

“Still,” A smile drew one side of the Elezen’s face up as he kept his grip, leaning over her. “You must allow me to make it up to you, little lady. We surely have interrupted your shopping just now, no? Pray, let me cover the cost of your purchase.”

“That’s not… necessary,” she glanced at the shopkeeper and smiled tightly, shaking her head. She had been tending to sailors and drifting along the stalls and docks for some weeks now, yet with each passing moment her discomfort grew under the Elezen’s hands. It wasn’t just the subtle reminders of… home. It was something else. Something that made her skin start to prickle. “It was really just an accident, there’s no need-”

“Come now!” The Elezen pulled her closer, his smile wide as he leaned both closer over her and towards the table, his arm snaking around her shoulder. His hyur companion shifted closer, appearing curious but voicing no opposition. “It was Nakim here that nearly sent you to the ground and the Twelve only know what might have happened then. Allow us to make it up to you so we may part ways without any ill will, hmm? Now, what were you looking at before we barged in?”

Verdandir tried to conceal her shudder and smiled hesitantly, every muscle taut under the Elezen man’s grip. “Again, it isn’t necessary… but if you insist? I was simply looking at a…”

“This?” The Elezen’s fingers brushed over the comb before she could point it out and Verdandir’s eyes jerked from it up to him and then over to the shopkeep who was eyeing the situation dubiously, unsure if he was making a sale or about to call for the Yellow Jackets.

“Ah… y..yes.”

“Then I’ll buy it for the little lady, if you please, and my thanks. Our apologies for the churlish disruption to your afternoon.” He picked up the comb she had previously admired and handed it over to the shopkeep before tipping his head to the hyur with him, who gave a small sigh while reaching for his coin purse. “The fellow paying now is Nakim Provost, my traveling companion and obviously one who should watch where he is going in a crowd. And I,” he accepted the wrapped comb and smiled, leaning back over her to ensure eye-contact while handing it over, his grip still firmly on her shoulder. “Am Odex Rigahoux, a… I suppose traveling ‘adventurer’ of sorts, is what they call it these days.”

Verdandir looked at the wrapped comb and then back at the man’s hazel eyes. Somehow she wanted to draw further back from those eyes and she felt her smile grow further strained. “A...Ah, yes.” Her fingers closed around the comb but his grip remained, both on her shoulder and the object, as if waiting… prompting her to do something. “O-oh, my name… I am Verdandir. Verdandir Sadi. Now if you’ll pardon me, I really must be on my way.”

“Of course, Miss Sadi,” Odex released both his hands quickly and leaned back, his smile bright on his weathered face. Nakim glanced between them as he placed the shopkeep’s change back in his coin purse and shrugged at the man, who returned the gesture, still eyeing the Elezen as the tall man stepped aside to allow the tiny Au Ra woman to slip off into the market stalls. “Do have a pleasant afternoon, little lady.”

Verdandir glanced over her shoulder and clutched the comb in her fingers tightly, trying to shake the unease from her mind. It wasn’t fair to carry such feelings with her simply because of an accent. It WAS just because of an accent… wasn’t it? She blinked away the feeling and put the thought of the man’s odd eyes out of her mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I say, Odex… What was THAT all about,” Nakim leaned up against the alleyway wall and scratched the scar on his cheek out of habit, frowning at the tall Elezen who sauntered in after him.

“Hmmm, you never lived long in Ishgard or the Forelands, did you? Just recently joined up, hm?” The older Elezen settled down onto a crate and removed his glove, studying the hand that had gripped the small woman’s shoulder intently. “In fact, I’d wager you couldn’t trace any of your family from the area, could you? So it wouldn’t affect you even if I tried...“

Nakim eyed his companion and frowned. “I’m almost afraid to ask…”

The grin that answered him was eerie and made the hyur shudder, reminding him of what the pair did under their guise of ‘adventurers’ that were so welcome in the City-States of late. Or rather, what Odex did and he had signed up for when the Elezen had found his skills useful enough when he had arrived in Tailfeather. “I’ve been tempted to start slipping you some of the blood we were gathering, ol’ Nakim, to see if it would do you any good, but alas… I doubt it would do a damned thing. If not kill you outright, and your skills are too useful to me.”

The hyur’s eyes widened at the other man’s words and he shoved himself away from the wall. “You WHA-!”

“Now now,” a dark chuckle cut him off as the Elezen started to clean a nail with a blade that Nakim had never seen him draw. When had…? “Like I said, you didn’t seem the type to take to it, so I didn’t bother. I’m the one to ‘suffer’ the need… and the benefits, aren’t I? Not that you complain when it helps, hm? Just because those puffed shirts in Ishgard went and signed a peace treaty doesn’t mean the demand for Dragon’s Blood is going to stop. And that means the price will simply go up for those willing to do what it takes to get it under the table and in other lands. You knew that when you signed on with me.”

“That still doesn’t explain all that back there.” Nakim sullenly folded his arms over his chest, not willing to push the previous statement. For now.

Odex flicked the blade absently and hmm’ed, his hazel eyes gleaming with a hint of amber around the centers as he chuckled. “There was something about that girl… Once you start with the Dragon Blood… it changes you. The more you take, the longer you take it, the more it does, and you start to be able to sense things. Like THEM. Either she’s connected to them somehow or…”

“...Or?” The hyur leaned forward, curious now. The girl had seemed pretty, delicate even, but he hadn’t sensed anything more than just a skittish young woman from her. Not that anyone wouldn’t be with Odex looming like that. Of course, he wasn’t really one for magic things or any of that… business. But if it meant more gil…

“Or she deals in magics enough that she has something to hide. Either way, I want to know. I have a name and a… hmmm. ‘Scent’. You and I should be able to handle things well enough. Shouldn’t we?”

Nakim sighed slightly and then shrugged, a lopsided smile tugging his lips. “Provided she moves out of the city? Tricky, but doable.”

“Oh, she’ll run, I could see it. She’ll run. And we’ll hunt. Just be ready.” He stood up and slipped the blade away, slapping a hand down on the hyur’s shoulder, fingers tightening. “Once she’s out of the city… I want to ask some questions of the little lady.”

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Persona Fandom Problems: “Guide to legally buying Persona games so Atlus can see the money” solution 2

So I guess some people didn’t see my first solution guide before, which broke down the rough cost of consoles (except PS4) and the games (which included the cheapest they’ve been at online and the base price available online). Tldr; going a few routes show it’s pretty cheap, esp if you can find the console cheap (the games however you either have to wait for to go down in price, otherwise they can get pricey, personally I expect them to go down again when P5R JPN/Outside JPN releases or maybe even doing it for Halloween/American Thanksgiving/Christmas included in a special it’s just a feeling but since it’s a new Persona game, they usually dock prices when a new Persona game comes out....at least in Japan, in the USA they will dock prices around our big holidays so keep it in mind.). The key is that you kinda have to buy the games digitally now, buy used and Atlus don’t see the money and at that point you could’ve just emulated or watched a let’s play/youtube “movie”.

That being said, it’s not to shame people who emulated (esp the older games), but if you had the money (or even had the console but not the games) it was a good guide to help people get into the game but also in a way that Atlus themselves see it so that it actually helps support the game.....But I’ve seen people getting pissy about this again, first they get mad people aren’t playing the games because it costs money, if you mention emulation, then they get pissy cause now it’s free and Atlus don’t see the money, and now it’s a cycle where you don’t win and are shamed or rushed into losing money.

BUT FEAR NOT! Here I have a new solution! :D One that combines emulation and buying (gasp I know). It’s a lot cheaper (esp if you wait for the digital prices to go down), and/because you don’t even need to buy a console. 

And the answer is........Emulate, but buy the game digitally from your PC/Computer to show your support that way. Simple! Alternatively, if you didn’t emulate it but watched a playthrough/walthrough or the anime series (probably illegally but hey anime isn’t cheap, and the games kinda are in comparison), you can still count. (basically, if you watched or played an emulated version of a Persona game or watched an adaptation, and you liked it, then buy it digitally to show support, you don’t need a system to buy it, but consider it payment for the experience). If you didn’t like a certain Persona game after trying it, then I guess you...props shouldn’t pay......which means I guess this post isn’t for you? 8U

Wait wait, I know you have questions: “How much money would the games cost,” “How do I set up an account,” “I’m not from the USA nor Japan for these specials,” That’s ok, under the cut I’ll explain all that stuff for you (if you know what to do from here, then you don’t need to go under the cut 8U)!

First the price of games. The first part listed in bold is what’s the lowest it’s been listed on a sale day (from what I can find) the 2nd number is what it’s currently listed as now for the base price. Now for P3/4 it shouldn’t matter which version you pick, but if you pick P3P and you want to support the FeMC more then pick P3P (same goes for P4G/Arena/Ultimax/Adachi DLC if you want more Adachi). Same tbh same can go for certain DLC stuff too, want more Marie? Buy Marie DLC. Want more Miku in your dancing games? Buy Miku. Want Adachi/Sho? Buy their DLC too! Want more Margaret? Buy her DLC in Arena/Ultimax (iirc it’s one of those two if not both, it’s been a hot minute ok? ;w;). I won’t be listing DLC, they don’t usually go on sale iirc, but feel free to explore on the website. (but yeah bold is the lowest I’ve SEEN/could find evidence of it go down in price, if there isn’t a price before “/” it’s because I can’t remember what the sale price was like 3+ years ago and the internet doesn’t have the number available for that time, but there have been sales on ALL the games so far)

Games (all PS3/PSP/PSVita/PS4, in rough release order)

Persona 1 (PSP, $/19.99)

Persona 2: Innocent Sin (PSP, $/19.99 )

Persona 2: Eternal Punishment (PS1 classic, $3.99/9.99)

Persona 3 FES (PS2 classic, $5.99/9.99)

Persona 3 Portable (PSP, $/19.99 )

Persona 4 (PS2 classic, $5.99/9.99)

Persona 4 Golden (Vita, $/19.99 )

Persona 4: Arena (PS3, $/14.99)

Persona 4: Ultimax (PS3, $/19.99, or if you have PS+ during the month it was free, then it is free for you and you save about $20).

Persona 4: Arena Story mode (Ultimax DLC, $9.99, aka you get the story of Arena and Ultimax for $29.98 instead of $34.98) 

Persona 5 (PS3/PS4, $ 13.99/19.99) (ultimate edition, 50.99/84.99

Persona Dancing All star triple pack (only way to get PS4 ver of P4D btw): /$59.99 

Persona 3: Dancing in Moonlight (Vita or PS4, $/39.99 or 59.99)

Persona 5: Dancing in Starlight (Vita or PS4, $/39.99 or 59.99)

Persona 4: Dancing All Night (Vita, $/24.99 )

P5R (PS4, $59.99, place holder)

Now onto the PSN account. If for some reason you don’t have a US/JPN account, and your country PSN doesn’t have any of these games then make a US/JPN one. US and JPN tend to have deals on these (not sure about other countries again). 

For Sony you can easily make one at this website, (if you can’t access Persona games digitally from your country, check this post on how to make an account from another country, it also tells you where to go on purchasing foreign PSN Currency if the account isn’t where you are from). The website and doing it on the Playstation are roughly similar (the video is assuming you are doing it on the PSN), so I wouldn’t worry too much.

Now I know I didn’t list the PQ games....and that’s because.....I dunno if you can buy them digitally from the Eshop website. You can if you have a 3DS buuuuuuuut.....that’s....not going to help......if you don’t have a 3DS....and you had to emulate or watch it.....If there’s a way I can’t seem to find it so sorry ;w;

But yeah that’s basically it, if you are a fan of the game you like you should buy it. But you should buy it in a way that it actually means supporting it (aka not buying used). Give Atlus the numbers, and let your money do the talking. Lastly, I have a veeeeeery big feeling that these digital games will go on sale when P5R is released. If that does happen, I’ll make a separate post with links to the JPN pages. 

[mislavthehunter]

The Garrison, fall

Mislav always watched the trees in the morning as he sat on the steps of his cottage with a mug of tea and a warm breakfast. It had been years since he last cared about days or months, now the seasons was his calendar and the sun his only timekeeper. He hunted or went fishing during the day, went to the town for provisions and to sell meat and furs and pick up bounties for bandit hands after dark, and the trees told him which animals to hunt, when the salmon would start struggling up the river, and when to build provisions and move the stacks of firewood closer to his cabin.

The forest was painted in greens, golds and reds, the nights were cold but the days still gave enough heat that the frost had not yet settled. The villagers would be bringing in the last apples and pears by now and they would start hoarding their money, Mislav knew, no matter how much they would like pelts to keep their beds warm come winter. Mislav closed his jacket tightly around himself as a gust of wind tore through the fields, making the leaves spin and dance along the path like wildfire.

He eyed the stack of furs and the backpack he had prepared last night and decided to follow the wildfire, deciding it was as good a sign as any. He washed and put the cup and bowl and spoon into the little cupboard, locked the door and cut through the woods, west and north, taking the long route and making sure to check the road was empty before he crossed it. He had done everything he could to stay within the limits set for him by the villagers for so long that he could almost feel the chain he had willingly forged for himself tighten around his neck and drag him back to his territory. Mislav ignored it, grit his teeth, and pushed on.

The people who had reclaimed the sawmill, once Geralt had dealt with whatever horrors had besieged the place, did not mind Mislav. They had their own business going delivering materials for the Nilfgaardian garrison, and since they delivered wood and Mislav delivered pelts, they were not in any kind of competition but rather recognised that they were mutually increasing the chances that the Nilfgaardians would stay and keep spending their wages and gold on exotic luxuries and restoration projects. He nodded at them, they nodded back, and did not make any comment when Mislav filled his water skin from the well before going on his way, keeping to the road now that the terrain started turning into marshlands.

It was well into the afternoon when he heard the drill sergeant yell well-meant abuse at his soldiers, and as he turned the corner, the entirety of the garrison came into view.

They had done good work since Mislav last visited, perhaps three months ago. It had been during summer, and he had sold a good amount of simple strap sandals to the soldiers who were keen on having something to wear that would let their feet breathe while they were off duty. Much had changed. They had built a landing dock by the broken bridge, set up a dry dock for smaller ships and two boat houses and now they were working on a long ramp reaching out into the river. Out of sight, Mislav could hear that they were busy doing something up at the ruins of the keep as well. It seemed the Nilfgaardians were here to stay. No one in or around White Orchard complained about this as they had gotten used to the new regime. The keep was out of the way, useless to the villagers, and having a well paid, standing army close by kept the sales up and the nekkers, drowner and bandit population down. For Mislav, it meant getting paid properly. Paid so that he had money to put by.

The soldiers currently on guard duty had been here long enough to both recognize Mislav and to have lost the edge on that horribly keen attitude that was the trade-mark of all soldiers eager to prove their worth. He got nods and curious questions regarding what he had brought in this time, so he showed them the pelts and told them of the order put down by the quartermaster, then showed them the wolf and bear fangs he had gathered and spent a few evenings drilling holes in and fashioning leather strings to pull through each one. Soldiers liked such trinkets, they were small enough to not break uniform regulations, and they used them to get the attention of girls in the south when they were sent back to Nilfgaard on rotations. By the time he had gotten past the gate guards, he had already sold three, and the word was spreading.

The bear fangs were sold out by the time he reached the broken bridge, and the wolf ones soon after. The double sets of panther fangs went last, he had priced them beyond what he thought he would get for them, but the drill sergeant had happily dished out the thirty crowns he asked for both sets, humming happily before he went back to yelling at three young soldiers who had been set to the task of moving the sea to the east the use of buckets.

As he was not allowed into the keep itself, Mislav leaned on the railing and watched the three soldiers walk down to the water, fill the buckets, carry them a hundred paces along the bank to the east, empty the buckets, and then walk back to repeat the process. Mislav remained puzzled about the seemingly pointless activity until the drill sergeant asked them if they felt like showing up for duty drunk again. Mislav shook his head, felt like he should smile, and turned his back on them to let them work at their punishment in peace.

The other soldiers were either training, doing chores or building things, having seemingly grown tired of the hurry-up-and-wait approach of the regular army. It was almost growing into a second town with all the construction going on. For someone who lived a solitary life in the woods, the size and life in the garrison was overwhelming, so Mislav was perfectly content being left alone until the quartermaster came rushing down the stairs to pick up and pay for his order of otter skins before rushing back, trailing assistants and paperwork to the amusement of the soldiers.

The sun was low on the horizon when commander Peter Saar Gwynleve finally showed up, all pleasant smiles and firm handshakes. He, like his soldiers, had the appearance of a Nilfgaardian who had been in the North for a while. He still held onto his southern style, polished black and gold armour and neatly trimmed beard, but like his fellow soldiers he had adopted some aspects of what the city-dwellers liked to think of as terribly exciting northern wilderness.

“My sincere apologies,” Gwynleve said , apparently to the pelt by Mislav's side. “Paperwork, you know how it is.”

Mislav didn't, but nodded anyway. He figured it was much like checking snares, it was something that had to be done. He opened the straps on the burlap roll and got to his feet, lifting the big bear pelt so the commander could get a good look at it.

He had spent time on this one. The skin was soft as silk and the fur cleaned and brushed, as agreed, and he could tell by the glint in the commander's eyes that it was fulfilling a few dreams. A grand bear pelt was proving to be a symbol of status and virility in Nilfgaard as well as in the north, or wealth, depending on how the owner of the pelt chose to tell the tale of how he came to own it.

“Wonderful work, as always, Mislav,” Gwynleve said as he nodded to two soldiers who stepped forward and took the pelt from him, folded it up and carried it between them up into the garrison while Mislav was given a heavy pouch of coin in return. He wondered if he should have said something, thanked the commander perhaps, but it felt wrong to do so and he doubted he could say anything that sounded remotely acceptable, so he nodded, kept quiet and waited for Gwynleve to leave.

He did not.

“You know, it is rather late,” the commander said, probably aiming for casual but ended up with an accidental, but calculated strike at Mislav's maladjusted sense of danger, setting off all the warning bells at once.  “Why don't you stay the night? We are having mutton chops with potatoes cut up into little boats, I hear it is considered a delicacy up here in the north. As my guest?”

“Thanks for the offer, sir,” Mislav said, and shook his head, hardly hearing his own voice over the frantic beat of his own heart. “But I best head back. Much to do before winter.”

“I see,” Gwynleve said, and he sounded disappointed of all things. Disappointed and confused. “You will not get far before nightfall, however. Can I at least extend the hospitality of the garrison, if not the keep?”

“Not to worry, I'll be staying with a friend. I'll have no challenge making it to his place by nightfall,” Mislav said, feeling cold sweat trickle down his back and soak into his shirt as he stood and put his backpack on. Gwynleve was standing between him and the steps down to the main path going through the garrison along the shore. He would not look up, would not beg, so he stared at the golden sun on the black armour and just stood there, pathetic, like a leashed dog waiting for a kick to the ribs.

“Very well.”

Mislav did not actually physically recoil from the hand that was proffered in his direction, but it was a near thing. He hesitated just for a moment before he took it, firmly, shaking twice before letting go.

“Give my best to your friend,” Gwynleve said as he stepped to the side. “And please do return soon if you find the time, furs are much sought after during winter and the nights are cold in the keep.”

“I'll return in a month or so, sir,” Mislav managed, mumbled a goodbye, and hurried off.

Gwynleve watched the hunter walk out of the east gate at a measured, calm pace, and wondered which odd northerner custom or phrasing he had misjudged or misunderstood this time. Perhaps a man did not invite another man to share a meal as a guest here in the wilderness. In Nilfgaard it was considered basic manners to build personal relations with ones business partners over a meal, but in this particular case, he was having as much success as the three young soldiers who had been attempting to move the sea to the east for the last three hours. It was not like he could physically restrain the man and expect to keep his rather excellent business either, no matter how much Gwynleve would have liked to hear the tales of a true hunter from the north.

“He left, sir?” a soldier asked, heaving for breath as he hurried up to the platform. “Hells, I wanted to ask him to reserve a bear fang necklace for me.”

“Yes, Hethelwhyte,” Gwynleve said, taking some pleasure in seeing the man surprised that he knew his name. “Perhaps we can make a list. Place a proper order, like we do for everything else. Go see the quartermaster and have it arranged, first come, first served, you know the drill.”

“Strange he didn't want to stay for food, sir. All the other traders do.”

“Hunters are solitary creatures here in the north,” Gwynleve said, faking expertise with practised ease. “He has every right to refuse, and we shall be respectful of their customs. Now, go see to the list.”

The soldier nodded, saluted with Nilfgaardian efficiency and set off up the stairs to the keep. By the time his footsteps had died away, the gates closed behind the hunter and left Gwynleve with his thoughts.

[mrslittletall]

So, I am finally done with Little Dragons Cafe.  Let’s recap... Was it a bad game? No. But... it wasn’t a good game either.  Honestly, as a game reviewer I probably would have given this game a solid 5/10, cause it delivers what it wants, but it could have made it so much better.  The biggest issue are the input lags and framerate issues. I don’t know how it is on PS4, but on Switch they were very prominent, in docked AND in handheld mode. I can live with framerate issues, tut he input issues were really annoying. Try to program your game more clean the next time.  A monestary system was greatly missing. You could gather every ingredient for free, but this was quickly getting demanding once you got more customers in the cafe per day. In the end, I was frantically running around, getting to all the ingredient spots I knew where on the menu and when stuff was running out, I usually just made a new dish with an ingredient I had 100 from.  The story was fine, but like, after a while pretty predictable and always worked the same. New guest comes, watch a few cut scenes, find out what their trouble is, cook dish, done.  My biggest issue is, that the cooking was kinda the most fun of the game with a rythm based minigame, but you didn’t need to cook outside of the story or for menu updates. It would have been very rad to switch jobs with Luccola or just be like “Press A next to Luccola” and the game would ask if you want to do his job this day with an option to quit it anytime. That would have been fun.  Some other annoying things:

The staff slacking! Well, I didn’t pay these guys, but still... it would have been nice if they would have done their job more seriously the more the game moved on.  Egg birds were running away after a few days. It is really annoying having to catch them all back. An option to raise them would have been nice.  Why could customers and employees shove me around when I was helping out in the cafe?! Good things about the game: The music! Aside from the first area around the cafe, where the music was a bit tedious, the later areas really had a fine soundtrack which often used the leitmotif of the game.  The soaring through the skys with the dragon was really fun and I would love for other games to have such an open to explore world. So, would I rec the game? Nah, at least not for the full price. Get it in a sale and play it one hour a day, that is more than enough.  If the game ever gets a sequel, I hope all the critiques will be adressed and it will rise to a 7/10. 

[alphacrone]

All Decked Out Like a Cowboy's Dream

[Part of the Blue-Eyed Jack ‘Verse]

CW: food mentions, homophobia mentions, being publicly out

When Jack and Bitty started publicly dating, the internet, well...the internet broke, just a little.

Though they were only known in their respective circles -- most of Bitty’s colleagues hadn’t heard of Jack and vice versa -- it was a big deal. Bitty was suddenly hailed as the “gay Carrie Underwood” and Jack had to order a moratorium on all jokes about his sexy “tractor.” They got the usual “keep your private life private” criticism from the AFA people (“Would that I could, y’all.”) and some nasty remarks from sports commentators, but it wasn’t as if either of them was coming out for the first time.

Mostly they both just had to suffer through the Blue-Eyed Jack memes. It seemed a fair price to pay for being able to date openly.

They’d only been dating a few months when Bitty approached Jack with a nervous, hopeful smile. They were in Vancouver on a short vacation together, walking hand-in-hand through the Granville Island market, pointing at the seagulls stealing food and laughing. They’d wandered down away from the market proper to a boat dock, and Jack read out the silliest boat names to Bitty in a straight-faced monotone. If he were being honest with himself, Bitty hadn’t laughed like this in a long time, even with all the time he spent with his goofy band. Jack was special, and Bitty was very, very lucky.

“So, I, uh, wanted to run something by you,” Bitty said as they fell into a comfortable silence. “You’re not busy on June 15th, are you?”

Jack raised an eyebrow. The Falcs had been knocked out of playoffs in the first round, hence the vacation -- Jack had needed to get far away and Bitty had needed to comfort his boyfriend in person. “I don’t have anything planned. Why?”

“Well, um…” Bitty scuffed his toe against the sidewalk. “That’s the night of the CMT Music Awards. I have a plus-one, was thinkin’ of reaching out to Troye Sivan to be my date, back before you. But, um...I know you don’t like public events…”

“Bits.” Jack squeezed his hand tighter and grinned. “I’d love to be your plus-one.”

“Really?” Bitty let out a deep sigh and leaned up against Jack’s arm. “That’s...I’m happy.”

“I’ve never been to Nashville outside of playing the Preds,” Jack said. “You’ll have to show me the sights.”

Bitty laughed, feeling a million times lighter. “Oh, yeah, I can show you all the crappy dives I used to play at. Oh! And the diner where I used to wash dishes. The fry cook there let me help him, sometimes, on slow nights. He even admitted my flapjacks were better than his.��� Bitty sighed, swinging Jack’s arm up and around his shoulder so he could tuck himself in against his boyfriend. “As soon as I hit my break, I sent him money for his daughter’s school supplies. I sent money to every bar owner in the city who gave me a chance, too, and the blues band that found me on the streets that first week and gave me a couch to crash on. There are a lot of snakes in Nashville,” he continued, voice growing softer. “But if it hadn’t been for the good people, I don’t even know if I would’ve survived. I try to visit them all, every time I’m in town. Gotta remember your roots,” he added with a laugh. “When interviewers ask about my family, I tell ‘em that the kind folks of the world are my family, and I’m theirs.”

Jack bent down suddenly to kiss Bitty, soft and sweet. “I don’t know how someone as positive and gracious as you ever agreed to date someone like me,” he said, smile teasing. “But I’m very, very glad.”

“Well, according to TMZ, it’s for your NHL paycheck,” Bitty chirped, slipping his hand into the back pocket of Jack’s jeans. “And this fella here.” He squeezed Jack’s ass, laughing.

Jack snorted and pulled Bitty along the path, back up to the crowded market. “C’mon, I saw a cheese stand inside. I know how you are about fancy cheeses.”

“You get me,” Bitty said, fluttering his eyelashes. “Lead the way, Mr. Zimmermann.”

  Despite Bitty renting a perfectly good house with his band, Jack got himself an overpriced suite in a fancy hotel as a treat for the two of them after the awards. Bitty suddenly didn’t care if Bitty & the Biscuits won anything -- he just wanted to spend the evening drinking with his band and then retire to the giant bed with ridiculously soft pillows to spend some alone time with his favorite person.

Unfortunately, that meant his favorite person wasn’t at the house to get ready with Bitty and the rest of the band. Their rented car would swing by the hotel to pick up on the way, but while Jack got to dress and primp in peace, Bitty was running around the house with three other panicked guys plus their dates and several stylists.

Despite his threat to invite Alexei Mashkov to the awards, Ransom had settled on Lardo as his date because he thought their height difference was hilarious and would make for great red carpet photos. Dex, the giant nerd that he was, had flown his grandmother down from Maine to be his plus-one. Chowder was bringing his girlfriend, Caitlin, whose natural Cara Delevingne brows and Target-sale-rack dress put them all to shame.

Bitty himself was dressed in a snazzy sky-blue suit with the top buttons of his shirt undone. His hair was coiffed spectacularly -- “The higher the hair, the closer to God,” he’d joked with his stylist. -- and his shoes were gold and shinier than anything. Bitty looked good and he hoped Us Weekly agreed.

Somehow, they managed to get the whole band and their dates into the small, white limo on time and headed towards the hotel where Jack was waiting. Ransom and Lardo kept chirping him about “seeing the bride before the wedding” or something equally as dumb, but Bitty simply ignored them and texted Jack that they were on their way.

When they pulled up to the taxi circle in front of the hotel, Bitty literally felt his jaw drop. Because there, waiting, in the tightest jeans he’d ever seen and a pair of gosh darn cowboy boots stood his boyfriend and sexiest man alive. His ass was a national treasure when he wore tennis shoes and basketball shorts; when he wore heeled boots and well-tailored jeans? The Zimmer-booty was the eighth modern wonder of the world.

“Well, shit, Bits,” Lardo said, following his gaze. “You hit the Jack-pot.”

Ransom snorted with laughter and Bitty couldn’t even find it in himself to be annoyed. He wondered how rude it would be to skip the awards and drag Jack upstairs to his suite immediately.

The driver came around and opened the door for Jack, and he crawled in with a shy grin. “You look really, really great,” he told Bitty, taking in his blue suit and styled hair. “You’re gonna steal the show.”

Bitty shook his head slowly. “No, I don’t think I am.”

When Jack cocked his head in confusion, Lardo clarified. “You look hot, Jack. You broke Bitty.”

“Really?” Jack looked surprised, then smug. “But it’s so early in the evening.”

The entire limo ooh-ed in dramatically scandalized tones. Even Dex’s grandmother laughed at the insinuation. Ransom elbowed Bitty in the ribs until Bitty smacked his arm hard.

“Shush,” Bitty said as the car began to drive again. “Let’s just discuss this year’s drinking game.”

“Alright,” Dex said, pulling a piece of paper from his pocket. “Take a shot every time someone trips or falls. Take a drink for every cowboy hat you see. Take a sip for every time Carrie Underwood changes her outfit. Oh!” Dex sighed and shoved the paper back into his jacket. “Chug your drink every time someone makes an off-color joke about us.”

“Great,” Ransom said. “We’ll be wasted within an hour.”

“None of them better say anything ugly about you boys,” Grandma Poindexter said crossly. “Else they’ll answer to me.”

“Wow, Dex,” Chowder said. “Your grandma is, like, way cooler than you.”

The boys chirped and fought the entire ride to the awards, leaving Bitty to reign in his overwhelmed little heart in relative peace.

  They didn’t win.

Bitty really hadn’t been expecting to, but it stung all the same.

Still -- he’d gotten to take drunk selfies with Kacey Musgraves and Jack had found Mike Fisher pretty quickly, two hockey boys in a sea of country stars. (Bitty could see the headlines already: Hockey Invasion?) There’d only been one tone-deaf gay joke about him, and Willie Nelson had smiled at him as he passed by his table. Dolly came over at one point to hug him tightly and make him promise to spend a day in the studio with her so they could record a duet or two. All in all, it had been a good evening.

And it was about to get better.

Bitty’s drunkenness had faded into a tired sort of buzz by the time he and Jack were dropped off at the hotel. They staggered to the room, giggly and sluggish. Bitty jumped onto the bed and kicked off his shoes, relishing the expensive squishiness of the mattress pad.

“You hungry, bud?” Jack asked, closing the door behind him. He shed his sports jacket, revealing the tight, white t-shirt underneath. Lord, he was the spitting image of the country hunk Bitty had dreamt about as a teenager. It suddenly really didn’t matter that Bitty & the Biscuits had lost -- Bitty had his award right here.

“Starving,” Bitty said, trying to sound suggestive, but the rumbling of his stomach ruined the moment.

Jack pulled out the room service menu, sitting down on the bed next to Bitty. “I could go for a burger. You wanna split a dessert?”

Bitty smiled up at Jack. “I want to make a comment about you being my dessert, but I also really want something smothered in chocolate.”

Jack laughed and pulled Bitty up until he was leaning against his chest. “Cheeseburger and fries for me. A ‘molten lava brownie deluxe’ for dessert. And…?”

“Ooh, fettuccine alfredo,” Bitty said with a happy sigh. “Yes, please.”

“It worries me how much dairy you eat,” Jack said teasingly. “And one giant bowl of cream and carbs, coming right up.”

“Just for that, you’re not getting any,” Bitty said petulantly. “Of either sort.”

Jack laughed and kissed Bitty’s head. “Will you love me again if I take you out for breakfast in the morning?”

“Maybe.” Bitty snuggled in closer, biting lightly at the underside of Jack’s jaw. “Will there be biscuits and gravy?”

“Of course,” Jack said. “To continue your diet of cream and carbs.”

“Chirp, chirp, chirp,” Bitty huffed. “It’s like you don’t want to get laid at all.”

“Bittle,” Jack said seriously, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “I saw how you looked at my ass all night. I have no fears about not getting laid.”

Bitty pouted and slapped Jack’s stomach lightly. “I knew I should’ve called Troye,” he said grumpily. “Troye wouldn’t be this rude to me.”

Jack laughed. “Troye’s ass wouldn’t look this good in jeans, either.”

“Ugh, just order the food you narcissist,” Bitty said. “You know the true way to my heart is through my stomach.”

“That I do,” Jack said smugly, leaning down to kiss Bitty again before picking up the phone. “That I do.”

“Love you, Cowboy,” Bitty murmured as Jack dialed the front desk. “Love you, too,” Jack whispered. “Hello? Yes, I’d like to order room service…”

[READ PART FOUR]

[OMGCP Country Singer AU]

[My writing tag]

[My online novel, The Discourt Knife]

[entergamingxp]

Burnout Paradise Remastered on Switch is an Excellent, But Expensive Port

June 25, 2020 11:00 AM EST

Burnout Paradise Remastered has received an excellent Switch port, but the price of admission is way too steep for what it is.

Burnout Paradise Remastered on the Switch is excellent. It looks the way you remember it, runs like a dream, and offers a complete package with tons of things to do and cars to collect.

But it’s also a port of a two-year old remaster of a 12-year old game, which released at a $49.99 USD retail cost on the Nintendo eShop when the PlayStation 4 version currently costs $10 digitally and $5 on Steam.

By all means, Burnout Paradise is an arcade racer worth experiencing, and its remaster is the best way to go about it. But its other versions being drastically more affordable make the Switch one a tough sell.

Like its initial release two years ago, the Switch version of Burnout Paradise Remastered is the complete edition of Criterion’s 2008 open-world hit. All the expansions — from the additional cars, bikes, and modes to Big Surf Island and so on — are included alongside the base game, which has been optimized by Stellar Entertainment to run at 60 frames per second in 900p docked and 720p in portable mode.

>>From The Archives: Burnout Paradise Remastered Review (PC, PS4, Xbox One)

It is a downgrade from its console and PC counterparts, which run in a native 1080p with 4K support, but it’s definitely not a dealbreaker. Visually, Paradise looked great when it first came out for the PS3 and Xbox 360, and it has aged remarkably well in the time since. Though it maybe isn’t running at the best fidelity possible, there was never a point where the Switch version of Paradise looked bad (on a TV or undocked) outside of a couple grainy textures or filters here and there that are barely noticeable when your car is zipping through the streets at top speed.

Perhaps more importantly, I never noticed a drop in performance. The game seemed to always stay at 60 FPS, and even if it did drop, it recovered fast enough before I could realize.

Paradise has also aged gracefully in terms of gameplay and structure. When Criterion was getting the Burnout series ready for its, at the time, true next-gen debut, the development team did so by transitioning it into an open world.

The end result was Paradise City, an expansive map that borrows bits and pieces from major cities across America to form a playground that plays to the series’ strengths and rewards exploration. The downtown area is filled with tight corners to drift around, construction sites to cut through to find shortcuts, and jumps that can either be used to your advantage in events or just as a means for faster navigation. The expressways, meanwhile, expand out into the mountains, letting you keep your foot (finger?) on the gas uninterrupted for long stretches of road.

Burnout’s main modes up to that point all made their way over too, in the form of events that are at every traffic light you come across in the game, and are started by revving your engine (holding in ZL and ZR at the same time). These events can be any of a standard race, Takedown (where you have to crash as many opposing drivers as you can within a time limit), Marked Man (get to a designated point in the city while other drivers try to total your car), Stunt Run (perform drifts, jumps, and other tricks to rack up the highest score you can), or a Burning Route (essentially a time trial).

Winning an event earns you a mark on your Paradise City license, the game’s main means of progression that starts as a learner’s permit with the goal of eventually upgrading it to a Burnout and then Elite level license.

As the wins pile up, your license improves and more cars unlock for you to try. It’s straightforward, and pretty simple, but it’s an approach that does its job in getting you from event to event, while giving you the freedom to do things at your own pace.

DJ Atomika, Paradise’s in-game radio host, put it best: “The best tip I can give to any new Paradise City resident who wants to compete is just cruise the city. Explore at your own speed, get to know the place. Finding the jumps, the shortcuts, the billboards, all that stuff is what makes you a winner.”

All the events are fun in their own way, and not only encourage different styles of driving, but also experimentation with different vehicles that carry varying stats.

While some races do keep you on a certain route through a series of checkpoints, I appreciated that a lot of them just require you to get to the finish line and don’t care how you do it. So you can take a complete detour from the rest of the pack and take a much quicker route, run all the opponents off the road, or take the standard approach of trying to outdrive them all. The game doesn’t care, first place is first place all the same in Paradise City.

Marked Man and Takedown, however, were my favorite events by far. I don’t know, something about running other cars one after the other into a support beam or off a ramp and into the ocean while Avril Lavigne’s “Girlfriend” plays on the in-game radio is oddly amusing.

Speaking of, Paradise’s licensed soundtrack is stellar all around. It’s perfectly suited to an aggressive arcade racer like this, and even includes a playlist of original tracks from older Burnout games if you have any nostalgia for them.

Admittedly, the event types do get a bit repetitive after so many hours. And while there are more than 150 vehicles available in the game, the DLC ones are unlocked for you right from the get-go, which takes away from that aforementioned encouragement to experiment because for much of my play time I already had access to a car that could pull off whatever I needed it to.

The difficulty never really presented much of a challenge, either. I never needed more than three tries to complete a particular event, and more often than not, me failing was a result of my own mistake, like taking a bad turn or accidentally driving straight into a wall that I didn’t have enough time to react to. It was almost never the result of AI drivers outsmarting me.

Paradise Remastered also retained its online suite in the Switch version, allowing you to participate in ranked events or invite friends into Freeburn Online to drive around the city together and create custom matches. But in an attempt, albeit a limited one, to try out a few online races, the game couldn’t find me a ranked match to jump into. I’m not sure if that was a server issue, low player count, or something with Nintendo Online, though.

Burnout Paradise Remastered’s pros far outweighs its cons, and I’d argue that its cons, as far as the game itself goes, are pretty minor to begin with.

The big issue is that as good as the Switch port is, it really doesn’t make sense to pay $50 for it when there are far more affordable ways to get the exact same experience. Maybe if the Switch was the only platform you own, but even then, it may be better to wait for a decent sale unless you absolutely cannot hold off.

June 25, 2020 11:00 AM EST

from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2020/06/burnout-paradise-remastered-on-switch-is-an-excellent-but-expensive-port/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=burnout-paradise-remastered-on-switch-is-an-excellent-but-expensive-port

[nightmare-afton-cosplay]

Inside Rihanna’s Hamptons Rental—and the Insane Price She Paid

Paras Griffin / Stringer / Getty Images

Rihanna is renting a house in the Hamptons! And she’s paying top dollar for the place, booking a five-bedroom, 8,900-square-foot rental from mid-July to mid-August for $415,000.

You read that right. Just under a half-million for four short weeks.

According to the New York Post, the 32-year-old Barbadian-born singer and Fenty founder has reportedly been house hunting on Long Island’s East End. But for the time being, she’s decided to rent a place in the area.

This choice property has an 85-foot dock.

realtor.com

Located in North Sea near Southampton, Rihanna’s summer spot also requires a $1 million deposit and comes with some star cachet. The estate was once inhabited by the Kardashian family during the filming of “Kourtney and Khloé Take the Hamptons” in 2014.

Inside Rihanna’s Hamptons rental

Water views abound in the open living and dining room.

realtor.com

Rihanna’s upcoming summer plans will be more than set on this fabulous property, a grassy 2 acres that form a private peninsula.

It includes a dock, which can accommodate two or three water crafts, paddleboards, and kayaks. The rental even comes complete with a boat.

Still, at $415,000, the bigger question is this: Did Rihanna overpay for her summer pad?

What the rental says about the Hamptons real estate market

“While this rental may seem incredibly expensive, given the current situation and market, this actually appears to be a reasonable price since luxury Hamptons properties are being scooped up at record prices due to insatiable demand,” explains Dolly Lenz, a real estate agent with the eponymous firm in New York City.

“The Hamptons rental market is on fire since rates are increasing and supply is declining and clients are paying a premium for shorter rentals,” says Sara Burack, a real estate agent with Nest Seekers in Bridgehampton.

Have the late-night munchies? The upscale kitchen is ready to serve.

realtor.com

Another factor at play in the Hamptons summer rentals rush: Vacations on the French Riviera and other upscale destinations are largely on hold for A-list celebs this season.

“Many of our clients who are renting now are people who would typically be summering at their properties in Europe or traveling abroad or on a boat elsewhere,” says Jennifer Lenz, a real estate agent at Dolly’s company. “With the pandemic affecting global luxury markets and the inability to travel abroad, the Hamptons have become the go-to destination.”

“Instead of hopping on a plane to hit the beaches, renters can enjoy a mere two-hour journey to some of the world’s top beaches and homes with spectacular views,” adds Burack.

Surrounded by verdant landscaping, the property includes a heated pool.

realtor.com

Alas, the Hamptons aren’t quite the Amalfi coast or the Greek isles, but the New York hot spot also isn’t a rough place to hang up your sarong, either.

“In addition to the chic vibes and fine dining, the Hamptons offer a huge emphasis on the equestrian lifestyle,” says Burack. Also, “now that kids aren’t in camp, there are many ways to entertain the whole family.”

In sum, she adds, “the Hamptons are the epitome of a private resort vacation but without the palm trees, though I’m sure if the tenant wanted them, it could be made to happen.”

Will Rihanna end up buying her rental?

For Rihanna’s entourage, 6.5 baths should be plenty.

realtor.com

As it turns out, Rihanna’s rental is actually for sale for $10.99 million. So might Rihanna snap up this massive manse as a permanent spot once the summer is over? Some say it’s likely.

In fact, the renter-to-buyer Hamptons rush has happened before, which suggests it very well may happen again.

“Many of these rentals will create a boomlet in the real estate market and become purchases in the fall, which is similar to what happened after Sept. 11,” Dolly adds.

This rental is also close to Southampton’s white-sand beaches.

realtor.com

The post Inside Rihanna’s Hamptons Rental—and the Insane Price She Paid appeared first on Real Estate News & Insights | realtor.com®.

from https://www.realtor.com/news/celebrity-real-estate/inside-rihanna-hamptons-rental-how-much-she-paid/

[umaspirateship]

fish out of water

    Gil felt a pang at being down at the docks while they were up on the ship’s decks. They’d all been inseparable once, he and Harry and Uma…

    As a kid, Gil mostly stuck to himself.

    That was a lie. As a kid, Gil mostly stuck to Uma. The LeFou to her Gaston, but like a version of Gaston that was far more cunning and beautiful and talented…

    He hadn’t been a very good henchman. He mostly spent his time watching Harry’s smile stretch across his cheeks whenever he made a joke and gazing at Uma lovingly as her hair swayed back and forth to the rhythm of the waves. Couldn’t sail a boat to save his hide, and he wasn’t very buff either. No, at that age he’d been a skinny little thing, his smile easily twice as big as his biceps.

    No one in my family is a minion! We are leaders, and I expect you to act as such! Not to mention, that sea witch has been targeted by Maleficent’s daughter herself. Do you not care about me? About my reputation?

    Dad didn’t like it. An understatement. Gil was suddenly sent to Dragon Hall instead of Serpent Prep. No one had ever told him why. They didn’t need to. And, just as naturally as losing his best friends, Gil suddenly became accustomed to eating the scraps at the dinner table – and trust me, what counted as scraps on the Isle was really just glorified poison. He’d had Gaston’s constitution to thank for surviving.

    So, like he’d said. Gil learned to stick to himself. He’d tried to form a new gang, once or twice, but every time he tried he was reminded of the feel of Harry’s hands tugging his towards danger or the way Uma (no, Shrimpy) looked when it was late in the afternoon, and they were all too tired to act evil anymore.

    Sure, he usually had a few girls and goons following him about, admiring his cleft chin and dazzling grin, but he was never the one anybody really wanted to hang out with. He was just a way to get to Gaston Jr. or Gaston the Third. His father’s namesakes in more than, well, name. Taller, buffer, meaner, and if you asked his teachers, smarter than him. Which, judging by the way Junes had a tendency to walk into walls after staring too long into a mirror, really said something about Gil. It hurt. His dad was all about being the best, and Gil … wasn’t.

    Maybe his mom had been spot on when she had chosen his name. Most of the time he felt like a fish out of water.

    So he spent his evenings arm wrestling minions until his arms turned black and blue from being slammed against the hard wooden crates that littered the harbor. He fought hard in back alleyways where news of his failings would never get back to his dad. Did pull-ups in doorways instead of going to class. When he found some old diet books amongst the usual garbage brought over from Auradon, he started hoarding eggs and spices, learning to cook.

    Judging by the looks of the girls, it seemed to be paying off. He hadn’t lost a game in a while and had taken to showing off in Ursula’s Fish and Chips. A small part of him wanted Uma to notice, to take him back as a henchman, but her eyes always seemed to glance over him, looking for something bigger. For an adventure.

    “Gil,” Gaston the Third said one afternoon, out of the blue, “You thinking about competing?”

    Third never talked to him during the day. That was an unspoken rule, and Gil didn't want to break it... but he was curious, and, as his teachers always said, stupid.

    “Competing in what? Is that what everyone’s been talking about? I’ve noticed an increase in chatter at the Fish and Chips shoppe, but I didn’t think...”

    “Of course you didn’t little bro,” Gaston Jr. chuckled from the other side of the room, “If it’s not about arm wrestling or girls, you’re pretty useless.”

    “Shut up, Junes,” hissed Third. “You’re hijacking my conversation.”

    “Oh, sorry. I’ll just leave and have a chat with dad about how you’re getting all chummy with the runt.”

    “Uh, guys?” Gil said, “You never said what the competition was.”

    “Hook’s giving one of his ships to whoever wins the boat race this weekend.”

    “Thanks, Junes,” Gil said. He thought, then frowned. “No, don’t think I’ll be entering that one. Ships aren’t really my thing.”

    “Really?” laughed Third, slapping him on the back. “Then why do you spend so much time down at the dock? You can’t honestly like fish and chips that much.”

    Anything to get out of the house, Gil thought.

    “Or maybe,” prodded Junes, poking him in the side, “He’s there to stare at his girlfriend, shrimpy. Remember how hung up on her you were?”

    Gil stood up mid-sentence and knocked over his chair. Gaston Jr. and Gaston the Third looked on, surprised. A man cleared his throat in the doorway. Gaston.

    Dad.

    “Dad, you’re home!” said Junes, his eyes shooting to the top of his head.

    “Gil,” Gaston growled, ignoring the greeting of his eldest son. “I told you not to talk to her anymore.”

    “Dad,” Gil started –

    “I thought you were getting better. You’ve certainly grown into quite an impressive kid. Not as impressive as I was at your age, but we’ve all got to start somewhere.”

    “Dad, I wasn’t...”

    “But now I hear that you’re hanging out with that, that shrimpy?”

    “Mal’s gone, dad. She’s a traitor! Shrimpy is going to tear Auradon to shreds, and I want to be there when she does. And anyway,” Gil glanced down at the broken chair, and avoided his Dad’s glare, “She doesn’t even remember me. We haven’t spoken.”

    “Yeah, dad,” Third started hesitantly, “everyone knows Gil only goes down to Fish and Chips because that’s where all the henchmen and pretty girls hang out. Someone’s got to admire his muscles, right?”

    “Plus, plus,” Junes jumped up, inspired, “It’s got the best tables for arm wrestling, see? Grub isn’t priced too badly either, and isn’t it better Gil take up less of the food budget?”

    “… I suppose,” said Gaston, “That I will let you off with a warning. But if you join those pirates, you will no longer be my son.”

    “You don’t need to worry, dad.”

    He would do anything to make his dad proud of him.

    Besides, it’s not like Shrimpy had a ship.

-----

    Even after that argument, Gil somehow found himself drawn to the Fish and Chips shoppe. Something about the stench of the place put him at ease.

    “Gil, kid,” the disgruntled cook said, tapping him on the shoulder, “You should probably stop flexing. Everyone’s left.”

    He glanced up. She was right, the place was vacant and quiet. The only noises were the rowdy screams and cheers from outside.

    Was the barrier broken? Had someone found the trident? Was there a sale on hats?

    No.

    He realized that immediately when he ran outside and saw what had captured the attention of the crowd that morning. The race. Of course! How could he have forgotten? That’s what had started that whole damned argument. He shoved his way to the front, ignoring the girls who occasionally grabbed at his biceps.

    The first thing he saw was a streak of blue hair moving fast.

    “Shrimpy!” he cried, smile big. He didn’t know how she managed to get her hands on a goblin ship, but there she was, in the lead. But wait…

    On the ship next to her, an unmistakable pirate was racing ahead.

    Harry Hook.

    It seemed like fate, that those two would end up neck and neck, sailing together until the finish line. They’d managed to stick it out as friends, even if Gil had left. His lips quirked into a half smile.

    In a flash, the race was over, Uma throwing her fist in the air in victory. Uma. That was her name. The crowd chanted it over and over like they were caught in a spell. Gil knew he was. Oh, wait. she was talking.

    “And I’d like to introduce you all to Harry Hook, my first mate!” Uma said, waving him up to stand next to her

    Harry stepped up on the boat, gripping his hook tightly. Woah. He was even more handsome than Gil had remembered. He tried not to faint looking at the both of them. That was definitely un-manly.

    He could have stared at them for hours, trying but unable to get the motivation to talk to them. His father’s words still rung in his head. But, eventually, the crowd dispersed and Gil wandered back to Ursula’s Fish and Chips, challenging the local scum to another round of arm wrestling.

    But, after beating thirty ugly goons, Gil’s arm was starting to get tired. For once in his life, all he wanted was to go home and go to bed.

    … he also wanted to –

    no.

    Sleep. He needed it.

    It was dark, this time, when Third came to talk to him.

    “Did you see the race?” Third asked, leaning against the bed. Gil sat up, groggy.

    “Did you seriously wake me up to ask that?”

    “Well, did you?” asked Junes, popping his head in the doorway. Figures. He always followed Third around. It was easier to pick up the latest gossip that way.

    “Just the end,” Gil muttered, “I’d forgotten about it.”

    “Then you’ll know that Uma and Harry have a ship,” said Junes, shutting the door.

    “Yeah, and?”

    “And? Don’t you get it?” Third said, staring Gil down. Gil didn’t realize a kid who went through two bottles of hairspray a week could look so serious. Third stood up pulled the old, tattered trunk from underneath Gil’s bed. “They’re the big shots on the Isle now. Nobody calls her shrimpy any more, not unless they want to lose a limb.”

    Gil’s eyes widened, glancing at the suitcase. If dad knew Third was saying this, doing this…

    "Wh-what?" he stuttered.

    “You idiot,” groaned Junes,” They’ve got a ship. You’d follow them off a cliff for some bizarre reason. And they’re looking for a pirate crew.”

-----

    His brothers helped him pack. He didn’t have much, but if Uma got them to Auradon, and he knew she would, he wouldn’t need it.

    He took a deep breath, stashed his suitcase behind some bushes to look less desperate, less unwanted, and walked up to Harry and Gil.

    Breath.

    “Heard you’re looking for muscle,” he said, his white teeth gleaming, trying to hide the way his heart was trying to leap out from his chest. He pulled up his shirt sleeves. Thank God he had gotten buff. “You’re in luck, as I’ve got some to spare.”

    And finally, somehow, he was enough. Home, almost. If he’d known what that meant.

    (he did)

[labellaeh]

Purchase Order financing ( aka PO financing)

PO financing can be a fantastic tool...for some businesses. PO financing is a short term loan. It's a loan from a funder who acquires goods on behalf ofa company who has obtained a Purchase Order that they cannot themselves afford to buy. The PO funder agrees to buy the goods on a company's behalf and retains ownership of the product until it's delivered. At the point of delivery, either the short term loan is discounted per the fee's and interest and the remainder is paid to the initial borrower. OR...credit is extended to the originator of the PO for another short term - another invoice is created and the funder, not the borrower, takes ownership of the this credit receivable. In this case, based on the terms of the receivable the funder will pay to the primary borrower ( recipient of the PO ) a percentage of the total funds to the borrower. When the final AR credit invoice is paid by the purchase order owner, the remainder of the funds are transmitted to the borrower less the AR fee's and interest. So, in this later case a borrower has engaged in two financing facility's ( combined they are referred to supply chain financing ) where the PO was financed and the AR was financed too. PO financing isn't necessarily seasonal either however, the situation may be seasonal for your company – in fact this is an excellent example of when to utilize a PO facility - ebbs and flows in your Sales cycle; What are the risks and how are they managed by the PO funder. The answer lies with the ‘trade’ quality or retail strength behind the PO. The PO issuer is often only one half of the equation …but sometimes they're all that matters interestingly enough. So, you can be forgiven if you thought it has to do with the quality of the ‘borrower’ - often they are marginally equated in an arrangement. Sometimes, more important than the borower is the value and resale of the inventory - is it easily marketable’? Alternatively, the borrower may be very important in the equation if they have to apply value-add to the inventory. For example, If a manufacturer is acquiring raw materials to the PO financing need, both borrower and buyer are equally assessed. Let me explain....If the borrower ( PO finance requester ) is buying materials to complete a finished marketable product, the funder needs to assess the entire supply chain including the borrower ensuring the ‘project’ is feasible and the borrower has the financial strength and skill sets to complete the manufacture/assembly of the project in order to fully comply and execute the PO. Scenario: Your business is a wholesaler and you’ve made trades over the last year of $1M. current stock is level is, say 45 days….bam! a retailer likes your new niche product and wants it bad – aren’t you lucky!!! Retailer extends a blanket PO for 12 months of 10MM dollars. This is the ideal scenario ( but the PO can be a straight one-time transaction also ). What are some of the keys to this project? Answer, strength of the PO issuer. If they are strong, what else matters in this scenario where you basically order the finished product and cross-dock it ( if at all as you may just ship from mfg-to-customer and avoid extra handling and freight costs). Answer, what are the terms of the deal AND what is the marketability of the product if the project fails beyond control after the inventory has been paid for? Let’s assume the product is marketable…the terms of the deal ( the PO Issuer says 60 days terms ) what do you do? Answer – accept it! Why…the PO finance company will factor that account receivable so that you have cash flows to keep the business operating after the inventory has been delivered to the buyer – the originator of the PO. Costs? PO financing is more risky than Accounts Receivable financing so you can expect the costs to be different. This may sound surprising since it’s the same company financing the ‘supply chain’ however, each borrowing need has a different risk rating hence cost variance. Simply, expect PO financing to be 1.5 - 3 %/monthly which is more than the cost of the Accounts Receivable. The AR may be 1-2%. So, to conclude, it’s imperative the wholesaler ( borrower ) has material margins in the Sales price. If a PO supply chain order costs 10 – 20% of the order ( a complete Sales cycle may be 120 days plus ), your prepared in advance to price your product under this scenario. Of course this is a wide open example…always trust a written offer before pricing your product. As you may have questioned, can a blanket PO been financed multiple times over the year…the likely answer is YES and 3 or 4 times over the year also so you can expect financing on the $1MM order example discussed earlier as such. But not for 20 times over the year causes the minimum funding amount per transaction to be too small for most PO funders and would be declined. While I’m thinking of it another important note to be clear about on PO financing is that you can have multiple origins per PO so don’t discard your Sale until you’ve asked us if your situation is applicable to a PO financing offer. Often it is. There are limitless scenario’s …regardless of country of origin. Contact me about your PO or inventory needs to see how we can help with your cash flow needs, often they can be financed. Greg LaBella is business financing advisor and debt originator

[shannrussell-blog1]

As a seasoned cruiser, I often hear the same comments over and over again. “You’re going on another cruise? How can you afford so many cruises? You must be rich! You get so many holidays.” I’ve come to the conclusion that there seem to be a few misconceptions when it comes to cruising.

For many, it seems like a big, expensive and unattainable goal. The more popular leisure cruising has become over the years, the more cruise lines are competing with each other to get your business. This means bigger and better ships, more holiday destinations, shorter itineraries available for weekend mini-getaways, and better-priced deals for cruises.

If you’re not quite convinced that cruising is the way to go for your next holiday, here are 7 reasons why you should make cruising your next destination.

There are so many reasons to head off on a cruise. 

1. Economical

If you are worried that going on a cruise will majorly set you back financially, you don’t need to be. The range of cruises is so vast that you can definitely find one to suit your budget. While there are some super cheap short cruises available under a few hundred dollars for just a few nights, even the longer cruises from 7-14 nights, which venture a bit further, are really good value.

What I like about paying for a cruise is that all of your basics are covered. At first, the thought of paying $1500-$2000 for a two-week cruise might seem like a lot of money. However, when you realise that the cost of the cruise covers all of your accommodation, meals, plus many activities and multiple forms of entertainment each day, it’s easy to see that compared to the costs of a land vacation, cruising is extremely economical.

Also, you don’t need to worry about the quality of the food and accommodation as all major reputable cruise lines keep their ships beautifully clean and maintained. Most dining rooms and lounges on cruise ships are luxurious too, featuring lots of unique decor.

With all your meals included, a cruise is actually not expensive at all. 

You can get some great deals if you do the research

There are also frequent sales on cruises so if you do some investigating, you can get a really good deal. Travel agents such as Flight Centre and Phil Hoffman often advertise great cruise sale packages so it’s important to keep an eye out. Some of these packages also include flights to and from the embarkation and disembarkation ports, which makes cruising even better value if you can get an all-inclusive package.

I recommend signing up to various cruise sale websites so that you get email notifications when there are sales. You can also sign up for great deals directly from the cruise lines themselves.

The costs of your room are included, making a cruise a convenient and economical trip. 

2. Convenient

If you dream of seeing some of the most famous landmarks in the world but just the thought of going on a big overseas holiday makes you exhausted, maybe cruising is for you. Not all cruises focus on small tropical islands—there are many cruises which travel to and from some of the most famous places in the world such as Sydney, London, New York, Greece, Italy, and even Egypt.

Most European holidays include tight bus and train schedules; early mornings and late nights waiting for transport; dragging luggage around from train station to airports; squeezing into run-down hostels; or alternatively paying exorbitant amounts for accommodation. Cruising eliminates all this, without eliminating the adventure.

Once you arrive and check in, your luggage is taken off your hands and to your cabin for you. You can then unpack your things knowing that while you’ll be visiting various places, your bed and all of your belongings stay put in one spot.

You can enjoy the incredible scenery without having to stress about catching transport. 

All the adventure, without the stress

Having your transport and accommodation together is a traveller’s dream. Even though this is exactly what cruising encompasses, it is so often overlooked. You don’t have to worry about catching trains and planes from location to location as you’ll be on your way to your next destination every time you sit down to dinner, enjoy a live performance or sleep peacefully in your bed.

You really don’t have to lift a finger on a holiday like this. 

3. Amazing places

I’ve seen ice breaking away from an Alaskan glacier, a large city crowded with skyscrapers towering overhead, grand New Zealand Fiords— all sailing past my window from the comfort of my cabin. To look up from your bed and see a breathtaking glacier floating past is an incredible experience.

Some people love soaking up the sun and being totally immersed in nature, and it might seem like cruising doesn’t allow that. However, there are many cruises which stop at different ports nearly every day where you can disembark to go hiking or take tours to explore the local area.

You’ll still get an incredible adventure, and get to experience nature on a cruise. 

Sometimes cruise ships even dock in a port overnight to give you more time at a destination. When you’re at sea, one of the best views of all is being completely surrounded by a blanket of royal-blue sea everywhere you look, whether it be by moonlight or sparkling under the sun.

Cruising gives you the option to enjoy amazing views either from the comfort of your luxurious floating accommodation or on the land when you dock. One day you can be sailing into the harbour of a giant city, the next to be completely surrounded by 360-degree views of breathtaking scenery.

With breathtaking scenery like this, you won’t miss out on seeing incredible things on board.

4. The people

Cruises often start to feel like small towns as you become more and more familiar with the staff and passengers during the trip. By the end of the cruise, you generally don’t want to leave your new community. The staff who have been assigned to look after you especially start to feel like family before the end of the voyage. It’s these connections with people from all different cultures and walks of life that make these trips so memorable.

To have the same people cleaning your cabin, serving your meals, and entertaining you throughout your whole trip means you really have a chance to get to know each other.

The staff on board provide impeccable service as well as entertainment. 

The incredible staff on board

The staff really go above and beyond to make sure that your holiday is unforgettable. From amazing towel animals left on your bed to memorising how you take your tea. I always find it hard to say goodbye at the end of a cruise, especially to my waiters who make every night at dinner unforgettable. I always love learning about where they’re from and hearing about their families who they spend so much time away from.

It is also great to get to meet so many different passengers on board and to hear about their backgrounds and where they’re going. Being on a cruise is like instantly being part of a giant family. I can guarantee you will forever remember the unique characters who made your holiday extra special.

On board, you can also listen to performances from talented musicians. 

5. Relax and unwind

Imagine lazing next to a pool all day and barely having to look up from your book to order a drink. Well, this can be your daily life on a cruise. Waiters are available to bring drinks right to your deck chair in between your pool and hot tub sessions. You can then return to your cabin to find the bed made perfectly, clothes folded and bathroom cleaned, without lifting a finger.

The crew all over the ship are there to serve you and will do everything they can to help. For your time on board, you’ll feel like royalty.

Log off and enjoy some relaxation by the pool. 

You get to decide what activities you do

For those who think they would get bored with this kind of life every day, fear not! Each cruise has a daily schedule which is jam-packed with all kinds of fun activities. These include dance classes, bingo, quizzes, lectures, movies, retails sales, cooking demonstrations, games, sports competitions and more. There is also usually a gym and many walking tracks on the decks which can be utilised at your leisure.

The great thing about having this provided is that you can decide how much or how little you want to do. Try and do all of it, or none of it, it’s up to you! Also, if you are in the mood for treating yourself, you can even head to the spa for a massage or beauty treatment at an extra cost.

You are the number one priority onboard a cruise for the crew and they certainly know how to make you feel special.

Whether you want to be more active, or enjoy some time – you’ve got both options.

6. Switch off

Some people don’t like not being able to use their phone or might need reliable access to the internet for work or other purposes. Other people, however, like to disconnect from messages and emails on holiday.

While there is internet and phone access on cruises for an extra cost, it’s a great chance to stay off your devices and enjoy the lack of responsibility. Each time you reach a new port and are back on land, you’ll have the option of finding free WiFi to make contact with the outside world. This is a more affordable option than the internet on board a ship.

If you’d prefer to take a break from what’s happening outside your vacation bubble, it’s easy to avoid the rest of the world and focus on what you’d like to try next at the buffet.

You can stay connected on your trip, or unwind and concentrate on enjoying the buffet. 

7. Something for everyone

The other great thing about cruising is that there is something for everyone. Whether you are young and looking to cruise with your friends, have little kids or a family, or are retired, there will be a cruise line to suit your needs.

There are activities for everyone – both young and old on a cruise. 

Types of cruises:

Family-focused cruises

Whilst almost every cruise caters for families by providing activity centres complete with child-minding, there are some companies which are more family-focused overall. The top family cruise lines are Disney; Carnival; Royal Caribbean International; Norwegian Cruise Line; and Princess. Most of their ships are equipped with extra activities to entertain both children and parents.

Some of these amazing attractions include multiple swimming pools, waterslides, carnival rides, rock climbing, ice skating, gaming arcades, dodgem cars, mini-golf and more. Most of the time these activities are included with your cruise fare but every line differs.

If you’re travelling with kids who haven’t been on a ship before, make sure you consider motion sickness. Cruise lines will have a doctor on board, as well as motion sickness medication available to purchase, but you might want to bring your own to be prepared.

Some lines will offer amazing activities for the kids to enjoy. 

Retirement age-friendly cruises

If you think you’re past these activities, the retirement age-friendly cruises Cunard, Celebrity and Holland-America Line are good options. Cunard ships have more of that old-world charm. They make you feel as though you’re on a grand transatlantic crossing voyage in the Titanic era. Of course though, these days there are enough lifeboats and safety procedures in place. Travelling by ship is actually one of the safest forms of transport.

Nowadays, ships are extremely safe to travel on. 

The wide sweeping decks on the Cunard line are largely kept empty apart from deck chairs and the traditional game of shuffleboard. This is quite the opposite of some of the more family-centred lines. The beautiful Queen Mary II even has a ballroom and planetarium on board.

Every afternoon there is a high tea in the ballroom with the opportunity to ballroom dance. You don’t even have to worry if you don’t have a partner—there are men who are actually employed to take passengers out for a spin on the dance floor.

The Queen Mary even has a planetarium on board the ship. 

Themed cruises

If you don’t fit into the families or retirement age categories, there are definitely other suitable cruises available. Occasionally there are special themed cruises including rock and roll cruises, singles cruises and schoolies cruises.

For students or young adults, P&O and Princess provide great cruise options. They are especially good for people on a budget as they often promote short, sample cruises at very affordable rates. The sample cruises are a great idea if you have never cruised before and just want to dip your toe.

Unwind on the deck and enjoy the serenity.

Have I convinced you to consider a cruise?

I hope you’ve been convinced that there is genuinely something for everyone on a cruise. It’s such a special and unique way to be able to see the world. It’s also much more achievable these days with so many different cruise lines offering great holiday deals.

So, if you’re in the mood to relax, visit new places, make new friends, eat delicious food, be treated like royalty, experience quality entertainment, and get great value for money on your next holiday, maybe it’s time to give cruising a go!

  Have I convinced you to ditch the endless airports and train stations for a cruise? 

The post 7 Reasons to Make a Cruise Your Next Destination appeared first on Snowys Blog.

[rodney-johnson-blog]

The Wall Street Syndicate is Still at Work

Maybe they benefited from divine intervention… or maybe they were just lucky. Either way, the students and staff of St. Francis High School in Mountain View, California must be pretty happy right now.

In 2012 the school took a chance, investing $15,000 in a small, little-known app maker called Snapchat. Last week the school sold two-thirds of its shares for $24 million when the stock went public. I’m sure they’re still giving thanks.

Other people took home some dough that day as well. The co-founders, Bobby Murphy and Evan Spiegel, both cashed out $272 million. Their remaining shares make them both members of the billionaire’s club.

All told, the company sold 145 million shares and insiders/early investors sold 55 million shares. The company netted around $2.4 billion to fund expansion and operations, while the individual sellers walked away with the remaining $1 billion.

This part of the story is fun, but it can’t hold a candle to the folks that really got away with all the cash… the syndicate.

The early investors and insiders took a chance on a company that currently generates revenue, but hemorrhages cash. In 2016, Snapchat brought in $404 million and lost $515 million. And there’s no end in sight.

For the uninitiated, Snapchat is essentially a photo- and video-based social networking service. It’s a hit mostly among teenagers and millennials, but parts of other demographics have caught on too. Direct messages, or “snaps,” disappear forever after someone views them. The app also has group chat and story features, and many big media and publishing brands have their own channels within Snapchat.

The company has 158 million daily users, so clearly those involved think there’s a way, perhaps somewhere in the distant future, to turn those eyeballs into dollar signs.

Stock investors that bought shares the day of the IPO also see some hope. The shares priced at $17, but opened at $24. Those buyers who were allocated shares in the IPO before trading opened earned a cool 40% instant profit.

Which brings us back to the mob, er, syndicate.

Long ago, in a galaxy far away, I worked on Wall Street. I learned the ins and outs of investment firms and eventually landed on a bond trading desk. Equity IPOs were part of the learning curve. We had to know how all of it worked.

Back then, attractive private companies – like Snapchat – would interview investment firms and choose a lead underwriter, who’d then put together a syndicate of investment firms to file all the paperwork necessary and handle the initial public offering of shares.

To fetch the highest price, the syndicate would go through the expensive, time-consuming process of generating sales material about the company and then holding dog-and-pony shows around the country to highlight the coming offering. This all culminated in the day of the offering, when the company and the underwriters found out if their marketing efforts were going to pay off.

For this effort, the syndicate of firms earned an eye-popping fee that could run between 5% and 10% of the funds raised. I can’t say the fee earned was in line with the efforts. It always seemed extravagant. But now, things are wildly out of proportion.

On Snapchat, the underwriter charged a “modest” fee of 2.5% of the funds raised, which works out to a mere $85 million. But, as they say in late-night TV ads, “Wait, wait! There’s more!”

In addition to this upfront fee, the underwriters have a 30-day option to purchase 30 million shares at the IPO price of $17, minus an underwriter’s discount. So not only do the mobsters, er, investment bankers, earn the difference between the current price of the shares and the IPO price, they also get an additional break.

At the close of opening day, this would have been at least an additional $210 million, bringing their IPO fee to a nifty $295 million.

Now, let’s review the heavy lifting that Morgan Stanley and Goldman Sachs had to do to snatch this fee from Snapchat. They had to file all the documents required by the SEC, verify holdings of early investors, map out the number of shares the company and insiders would sell, and gauge interest from investors to determine the appropriate price for the shares.

A handful of associates with working knowledge of SEC filings and telephones could have done all of these things

What syndicate members didn’t have to do was introduce anyone in the investment world to Snapchat. The app store on everyone’s smartphones handled that. So the most time-intensive, personality-driven part of the process, the marketing of the company and selling shares to potential investors, was done for them.

And yet they earned almost $300 million. What a job!

These firms will go to great lengths to explain how much groundwork they had to lay ahead of the IPO, and how their research departments will support Snapchat in the years to come. But all that masks the real reason that companies, even ones that seem the newest of age like Snapchat, still use Wall Street. They’re scared that investment bankers will give them the cold shoulder if they cut them out.

If a company goes public without prominent underwriters, it risks such companies refusing to follow the stock in their research department, which precludes the clients of the investment firms from buying the stock.

And then there’s the matter of getting loans from these companies later, or further rounds of stock sales. Essentially, if companies don’t play ball, Wall Street can put financial hurdles in their way for years to come.

It sounds a lot like another syndicate… the one that controls the docks, garbage pickup, and cement in New York.

I’m guessing Murphy and Spiegel, the co-founders, don’t care. They did walk away with more than a quarter of a billion dollars in cash, after all.

But this is one more area, like politics, where I thought the internet was going to dramatically reduce the influence of money. I thought information would flow so freely as to cut out the middlemen, resulting in lower fees and greater access across the board.

That might be true one day, but the Snapchat IPO proves that today it still pays to be a member of the syndicate.

Rodney Follow me on Twitter @RJHSDent

Be sure to read more at Economy & Markets Daily!

[theredherb]

Is the Nintendo Switch Launching Too Early?

Breaking Down the Info from the Hybrid Console’s Big Presser

When Nintendo finally revealed the Switch back in late October, I was left more excited about the company’s future in hardware than I have been in years. Granted, that initial trailer was the idealized vision of the console: it was direct in its messaging while shrewdly omitting any hype-strangling details like battery life, resolution, and, most importantly, price. What we were left with was the exciting prospect of console quality games (like the newest Zelda opus) on a handheld hybrid that features modular controllers; a machine that cobbles together what Nintendo is best at -- forward thinking portability and first-party games so good they stand head and shoulders with the best this industry has to give.

On Thursday, Nintendo began filling in the blanks, setting about to answer (at least some) of the questions fans have had circling in their heads since the system’s unveiling. You can watch the entire conference here but, coming from someone that sat through a livestream of the proceeding -- awaiting something, anything, that signaled Nintendo’s return to form -- I’d recommend just reading up on the cliff notes.

Though the affair was poised in the same fashion as one of Sony’s knockout E3 conferences, Nintendo couldn’t land the same blows. I began the show with more enthusiasm than Nintendo let me leave with. After the abject failure of the Wii U (a console that only managed to push slightly north of 13 million units -- the worst sales in Nintendo’s hardware history barring the Virtual Boy) the Switch needed to be touted as a reckoning. It was Nintendo’s chance to convince the fence-sitters to choose their side of the picket. We didn’t get that Thursday night.

Nintendo has always floundered in the stage show department, though. You’re asking the same company that thought this shit was a good idea to try and wow us in an hour and a half. Nintendo’s like that shy kid at the back of the class: he tests well and always turns in his homework, but the second you ask him to walk up to the board and present, he becomes a mumbling, incoherent mess. Of course they shit the bed. This is Nintendo we’re talking about. Credit to that first Switch video, though. I fell for it, too! I wrongly assumed Nintendo was trying to demonstrate they’ve turned a new leaf (no pun intended, Animal Crossing fans). At the presentation, however, it seems Nintendo isn’t just making its same old mistakes but brand new ones.

But I think it’s important to remember that a poor showcase isn’t enough reason to condemn the hardware itself. The tech, despite Nintendo’s aloof messaging, still looks cool. So let’s try to unpack what we learned at the showcase (and the info we gleaned in the days following) without having to suffer through awkward squid doctors and a translator whose probably looking for a new job right about now:

The Nintendo Switch launches March 3rd and costs $299.

I had it in my mind that if NIntendo wanted to blow some toadstools, the price would have been $249. However, this gives them some wiggle room if they wanted to make a $50 cut closer toward the holidays (or if it performs, shall we say, shittily?). Still, $300 is in bounds of reason. Base model PlayStation 4’s and Xbox One’s start at that price. While enthusiasts understand, and could potentially be irked by, the fact that they’re paying the same price for a console that has less horsepower than its contemporaries, we should look to the casual consumer’s mentality instead.

The casual consumer is likely to see this new system from trusty Nintendo --a brand so storied that there was once a time in my childhood where my parents referred to any video game console I had as “a Nintendo” -- see the similar pricing, and lump the Switch’s capability in the same bracket. Any cheaper and a casual consumer may begin to think of the Switch as a handheld: a complementary device that can’t do what a home console does. The very perception Nintendo doesn’t want, evidenced by their reminding us that it is a home console every chance they get.

If you don’t think that’s a genuine concern, keep in mind that the mainstream audience who made the Wii a massive success didn’t  know the Wii U was a separate console. Sometimes, even retailers didn’t know what the hell it was.

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is a launch title. Mario isn’t.

Nintendo ended its ten-mile-jog-through-glass of a presentation with one of the only franchises in this industry that hasn’t been poisoned by cynicism. And goodness gracious does it look breathtaking (sorry, another dollar for the pun jar). Nintendo is well aware that a new Zelda game can pry wallets open -- especially the rare Zelda game that releases at a system’s launch. Unfortunately, Breath of the Wild seems to be the only compelling reason to snag a Switch on Day One.

Super Mario Odyssey, a brand new adventure that sees the Italian reptile stomper leap between dimensions (including an analog for NYC called “New Donk City”... let that settle inside you for a moment), won’t hit the launch window. It’s tentatively set for Holiday 2017. I’m not trying to gloss over the power or draw of a new Zelda title but… that’s coming out on Wii U as well. If you wanted a surefire system seller that tickles the fancies of the mainstream and hardcore, young and old alike, then you sell it alongside a Mario title. So why not wait until your flagship game was ready?

One gander at the launch lineup only underlines this point: there’s only three other games releasing on day one besides Zelda. You have the gimmicky 1-2-Switch that relies on the motion sensors within your Joy-Con controllers to play party games (you can see shades of Nintendo’s belief that the Wii wasn’t a hugely successful fluke in this game); then there’s two third-party offerings from Ubisoft and Activision -- Just Dance 2017 and Skylanders Imaginators, respectively. That’s a paltry showing, even taking into account launches tend to be historically thin.

Beyond that, our confirmed launch window games are either ports of games that have been out for years already (like Skyrim, I Am Setsuna, and Lego City Undercover) or updates to existing Wii U games (like Mario Kart 8 Deluxe and Splatoon 2… don’t let the 2 fool you, this sequel feels incremental rather than substantial). There’s some standouts, though. Super Bomberman R looks good, as does Arms which is said to be a surprisingly engaging fighter despite its stupid, stupid name and Nintendo’s obvious attempt to make it A Thing.

The accessories cost an arm and a leg and the other leg too.

This one truly boggles the mind. It’s like Nintendo is trying to offset the money they lost on the Wii U by taxing the shit out of us. Here’s the breakdown:

-Left & Right Joy-Con Controllers: $49.99 for one/$79.99 for both. Okay, I get that there’s all sorts of fancy tech shoved into these little guys. They feature “HD Rumble” which offers impressive feedback, letting you feel like you’re rattling a real cup full of ice or fondling a cow. Then there’s the IR sensor capable of spatial detection so precise, it can detect your very hand gestures. Awesome. Except… will that make a difference when you’re playing a traditional single-player game like Breath of the Wild? Motion controls and playing virtual rock, paper, scissors are decidedly not why I’m excited about a console/handheld hybrid.

-Pro Controller: $69.99. Now you’re off your fucking rocker, Nintendo. The way in which traditionalists and hardcore gamers will undoubtedly favor to play is more expensive than a PS4 or Xbox One controller. Granted, they couldn’t resist tossing in that “HD Rumble” and amiibo functionality. I’m sure that drove up the cost. But goddamn. Imagine wanting to play Zelda with a Pro Controller at launch. You’re out $430 and you only own one game.

-Joy-Con Charging Grip: $29.99. If you’re skipping out on the Pro Controller but still wish to play on your TV, you’ll have to snap off your Joy-Cons to go wireless. Ah, but the charge on those babies drains. Enter the Charging Grip, a peripheral that serves as its own controller while it juices up your Joy-Cons. Ostensibly the only other reasonably priced accessory besides the $14.99 set of Joy-Con Wheels.

-Nintendo Switch Dock Set: $89.99. And we’re back into the clutches of greedy insanity. Now, this bundle -- which includes the dock, AC adapter, and an HDMI cord -- is paired with every Switch out of the box. But, say, your toddler decides to feed your dock some peanut butter or subjects it to a water level in your bathtub, this is one pricey replacement. It looks like a hunk of plastic (and very well could be) but the fact games run at a higher resolution when the Switch is docked could point to more intricate internal components. Still, a $90 price gouge dashes most gamers’ dreams of buying a dock for every TV in the house for convenience's sake (don’t act like you didn’t think about it; deep down, we’re all that lazy).

There’s going to be a paid subscription service for online play, and it already sounds bad.

It’s astounding Nintendo hasn’t figured out an online ecosystem. Nintendo struggles with requisite features companies like Microsoft figured out fourteen years ago. I don’t even mind that they’re charging for the service. Feels like an inevitability in the console space -- though I will argue they have a serious uphill battle ahead to prove the service is worth the coin. What bothers me is that there has been no information on the continuity of service when it comes to transferring Virtual Console games over from the Wii U. There’s also been no word if we’ll finally see a system-wide Achievement feature -- another failing of the Wii U that fans have been pleading to see.

What we do know is that the online service will be free to Nintendo Account holders until the Fall -- when the feature is launched in proper.  They’re also offering a free NES or SNES download every month. That’s cute, and they’re incorporating online play to these retro titles, too, but the sour little caveat is that these games are free and playable only for the month you get them. Nintendo, buddy, you’ve already allowed yourself to get meat-checked by the competition, and your system isn’t out yet.

It gets better. They’re attempting to launch a “dedicated smart device app” that “will connect to Nintendo Switch and let you invite friends to play online, set play appointments, and chat with friends during online matches in compatible games -- all from your smart device.”

Are you seriously telling me the console that you’re launching in 2017 doesn’t have native voice chat? That I have to use an external device to play with friends? Nintendo’s been vague when it comes to online-play. Hell, Nintendo’s vague in general, so I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt until they clarify the matter… Otherwise, I’d have to call them out for being hopelessly fucking antiquated and warn them that their clownish decision making is a self-paved death march out of the hardware business.

Listen, I want to eat crow. I hope Nintendo makes me choke on my own words. I hope, as I always do when they release new gadgets, that Nintendo succeeds. The company is how I first broke into gaming, and those early days with the Super Nintendo are some of my fondest. Of course I want to see Nintendo score another win. In a year’s time, I want to feel like the Switch is an integral, oft used part of my gaming life. The device is interesting and the most appealing piece of machinery Nintendo has shown us in years. But a system is only as good as its games, and this March, there’s only really one title I can hang my hat on. I sincerely hope that changes and that 2017 isn’t as dry as looks right now.

Something stinks about this launch lineup. It stinks of Sega Saturn. The Saturn launched before developers were ready for it, having very little in the way of games prepared for the new console, and Sega suffered the consequences. Again, I’m behind the concept of the Switch 100%. But, from this outlook, it makes little sense for Nintendo to launch in two months. It doesn’t feel ready.

Sure, Nintendo has survived abysmal launches before. The 3DS launched with a nigh empty catalog and that little bastard has been kicking for five years now (managing to smother the Vita along the way). But for as much pull as our favorite Hyrulian has, Mario’s your bigger draw. And what happened to that Pokemon game supposedly in development for the Switch? If Nintendo waited until the Fall and launched with the holy triumvirate of Breath of the Wild, Mario Odyssey, and a new Pokemon, the Switch would sell like gangbusters.

Even the company’s shareholders are having a tough time believing the Switch can reach a wide audience. Just a day after the big conference, Nintendo’s stocks dropped 5.75 percent. It feels just as dismal on the game dev side. The Game Developers Conference released the results of a poll where 50 percent of developers think the Switch can outsell the Wii U. I know, predictions don’t necessarily dictate reality. No, what has me distressed is that, of those who were polled, only 3 percent were actively working on a Switch game.

I’m… trying to remain optimistic. Consoles can make turnarounds. The PS3 famously pulled away from the faulty, downright arrogant decision making that plagued its early years and fought to close the gap Microsoft had forged with the Xbox 360. It’s just that I’d hate to have to wait four years for the Switch to really find its step -- in the same amount of time, the Wii U expended its entire life cycle.

[jobsinchicago911]

Ramp Service Cargo Agent, Office Warehouse Cargo Agent and Material Handler

Ramp Service Cargo Agent, Office Warehouse Cargo Agent and Material Handler

About Skills for Chicagoland’s Future

Give yourself a competitive advantage by applying to this role through Skills for Chicagoland’s Future (Skills). Skills is a nonprofit organization that partners with organizations across the Chicagoland area to place unemployed and underemployed job seekers with employers that are committed to hiring talent through Skills.

Why utilize Skills for Chicagoland’s Future as one of your job search sources?

Skills is your advocate with the hiring company throughout the hiring process. Any job seeker who Skills determines is a match for the role is interviewed by a member of Skills’ Talent Acquisition Team and provided with additional insights into the role. Additionally, Skills is free for job seekers.

HIRING COMPANY

WFS (Worldwide Flight Services) is one of the world’s leading ground handling organisations, providing high quality cargo, passenger, premium, ramp, baggage and technical services across a network spanning over 175 locations in more than 22 countries on five continents

RAMP SERVICE CARGO AGENT JOB DESCRIPTION (FULL-TIME):

The work of a Ramp Service Clerk includes the following: loading and unloading of cargo (mail, express, baggage, freight, and company material) on and off aircraft; the transporting of cargo between terminals and aircraft; the ramp transfers of cargo where required; the receiving, delivering, and physical handling of freight and company material, export at the designated express docks, mail and baggage in the outbound baggage room; the completion of forms and messages related to and necessary for the performance of the designated locations of the functions described.

The cleaning and servicing of cabin interiors, including cockpit and lavatories; draining lavatories; checking, handling, assembling, removing and installing passenger service cabin furnishings and supplies. Transporting such furnishings and supplies to and from aircraft. Assisting in loading, unloading and racking both filled and empty drums.

In addition, de-icing aircraft, clear aircraft windshields, pushout/two aircraft and related guide man functions; connect/remove ground power and ground start units. May be required to clean the exterior of aircraft with specialized cleaning fluids. May be assigned to perform routine cleaning of work areas, ramps, and facilities with or without powered equipment. May be assigned to assist in monitoring security of facility. May be assigned to do routine automotive repair; servicing and cleaning of powered and unpowered equipment. Comply with WFS site security procedures for assigned warehouse and other operations. Remain cognizant of WFS staff, security contractors, and visitors’ activities and report security breaches, suspicious occurrences, or non-compliance with the site security plan to managers or via the WFS whistleblower program.

REQUIRED SKILLS

Load and unload aircraft of cargo weighing up to 70 lbs. in and out of aircraft within confined cargo areas, push, pull, and position loaded containers weighing up to 3,200 lbs. on rollers with/to aircraft.

Driving vehicles with gross weights of 3,000 to 80,000 lbs. in areas congested with aircraft, moving and stationary vehicles and equipment as well as positioning vehicle up to aircraft requiring depth perception and the ability to distinguish colors, red, green, and yellow.

Engage in push-out of aircraft driving 80,000 lb. vehicle or assist by providing guide function to driver using depth perception in congested areas or speaking to cockpit during push-back procedure.

Transport cargo to and from aircraft driving 3,000 lb. vehicle using depth perception to negotiate vehicle with attached carts through congested area. Read “off-load” sheets to determine destination of cargo.

While performing aircraft push-out and/or towing functions, engage in proper specific ground to cockpit communication via hand signals and voice commands, with and without, the assistance of sight or visual aids.

Ability to successfully communicate with others.

Ability to work in a high-noise level environment.

Ability to understand and react to verbal commands and safety warnings, with and without, assistance of sight or visual aids.

Pull, push, and lift bags weighing up to 70 lbs. onto or from a conveyor belt.

Pull water hose from stationary cabinet and connect to aircraft.

Lift, connect overhead and remove overhead, 40 lb. KVA electric cable to/from aircraft.

De-ice aircraft at heights of up to 20 – 80 ft. lifting and holding nose, spray exterior of wings and fuselage with glycol.

Ability to judge distances.

Ability to confront and question unauthorized personnel in secured areas and report their presence to authorities as necessary.

Reports to work on a regular and timely basis.

REQUIRED EXPERIENCE

Must be at least 18 years of age.

High school diploma or GED is required.

Valid driver’s license.

Ability to work rotating shifts including weekends (i.e. Friday, Saturday and Sunday), holidays, and days off. Ability to read, write, fluently speak and understand the English language.

OFFICE WAREHOUSE CARGO AGENT JOB DESCRIPTION (FULL-TIME):

The work of Agent Cargo includes computer data entry; prepares all flight documents; interfaces with U.S. Customs; prepares all import and export documentation, and accepts/distributes cargo in accordance with applicable air carrier and Department of Transportation (DOT) regulations. Complies lists of customers for use as sales leads. Solicits orders or talks with customers to complete sales. Quotes prices and terms and prepares sales contracts for orders obtained. Estimates date of delivery to customer, based on knowledge of company’s delivery schedules. Moves cargo up to 70lbs. Comply with WFS site security procedures for assigned warehouse and other operations. Remain cognizant of WFS staff, security contractors, and visitors’ activities and report security breaches, suspicious occurrences, or non-compliance with the site security plan to managers or via the WFS whistleblower program.

REQUIRED SKILLS:

Ability to handle the stress of a fast-paced eight hour shift.

Ability to learn PC skills and apply knowledge.

Ability to concentrate on detail.

Minimum typing speed of 30 WPM.

Ability to lift up to 70 lbs.

Ability to drive all cargo handling equipment.

Ability to step up to an above ground level.

Retrieve import/deliver export documents to and from aircraft.

REQUIRED EXPERIENCE:

Must be at least 18 years of age

High School diploma or GED required.

Must have a valid driver’s license.

Ability to work 03:30 pm – 12:00 am, including weekends (i.e. Friday, Saturday and Sunday), holidays and days off.

Ability to read, write, fluently speak and understand the English language .

SALARY AND BENEFIT INFORMATION

FULL-TIME, Direct Placement

$14.15 per hour, plus overtime pay available after 40 hours (not mandatory)

M edical, dental, vision, life, short-term, long-term disability, hospital indemnity, critical illness and accident insurance after 90 days

MATERIAL HANDLER JOB DESCRIPTION (PART-TIME):

Load and unload postal bulk mail carts and containers (UPS).

Safe handling and operation of postal bulk mail carts (APC/BMC/OTR, etc.).

Build-up and break-down of mail and freight, as applicable.

Safe handling and transfer of mail and freight, as applicable.

Verify and scan mail and freight, as applicable.

Safe operation of all Ground Support Equipment (GSE), as trained and certified.

Maintain a neat, clean and organized warehouse and work area.

Clean GSE, ramp, warehouse, bathrooms, office areas and customer areas, as directed.

Comply with WFS site security procedures for assigned warehouse and other operations.

Remain cognizant of WFS staff, security contractors, and visitors’ activities and report security breaches, suspicious occurrences, or non-compliance with the site security plan to managers or via the WFS whistleblower program.

REQUIRED SKILLS:

Adhere to all airport and facility regulations regarding proper security and identification procedures, including correct escort responsibilities and challenge procedures.

Comply with all safety regulations, methods, and procedures required by WFS, USPS, airport, and all applicable government agencies

Advice Supervisor immediately regarding any hazardous materials (HAZ-MAT) cargo and/or any irregularities (e.g., spills, damaged items, pilferage, etc.).

Compliance with WFS policy for reporting injuries, incidents, damage, and theft:

Report ALL injuries, incidents, damage, and/or theft immediately to the Supervisor.

Ability to lift 70 lbs.

REQUIRED EXPERIENCE:

High School diploma or GED required.

Must have a valid driver’s license.

Must be at least 18 years of age if position requires driving cargo handling equipment.

Ability to work Tuesday – Friday, holidays and days off.

Ability to read, write, fluently speak and understand the English language.

*This role is PART-TIME of with 14-20 hours a week – either 12:00 am – 4:00 am or 5:30 pm – 9:30 pm Tuesday – Friday

SALARY AND BENEFIT INFORMATION

$22.30 per hour, plus overtime pay available after 40 hours (not mandatory)

Medical, dental, vision, life, short-term, long-term disability, hospital indemnity, critical illness and accident insurance after 90 days

LOCATION – 514 Express Center Drive. Chicago, Illinois 60666 (on the southwest corner of Montrose and Mannheim Road in Chicago, right on the O’Hare campus)

For more information about Skills for Chicagoland’s Future, and to view additional roles Skills is currently placing unemployed/underemployed job seekers into visit www.scfjobs.com

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