#and don’t get me wrong it’s sick as fuck and I love it but. but cmon.
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Moros is like if thanatos wasn’t a sad emo virgin all the time and actually managed to somewhat talk about his feelings, also long hair
#don’t get me wrong I LOVE that than is a sad emo virgin who can’t talk about his feelings#the difference is that you can tell that moros fucks just a little bit more#also long hair#they both have autism btw#tbh I don’t know what I’m saying I’m sick and it’s early in the morning#moros hades#thanatos hades#hades 2#hades game
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laying in the bathtub, minding my own business, when all of a sudden I hear a little scratching sound. Like nails on metal or something. Like perhaps there is a little mouse in my house. The cats and I are having a house meeting right now and discussing the difference between prey species who are friends and prey species that are not allowed in our house. Love and respect to the mouse, but he does not make the cut.
We are also discussing the things they’ve done wrong (peeing on the bed and shitting in the sink to name a few) and what they could do in these trying times to help me forgive them for these past misdeeds.
#don’t get me wrong I love mice. they’re adorable. but I’m like actually sick to my stomach over this#like what if it’s not just one. what if there’s a whole fucking nest in my walls or something.#I used to live in a house infested with mice and my landlords wouldn’t do shit abt it#my post
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if anyone does anything that makes me feel even remotely out of control it changes my brain chemistry about them forever even if I know they mean well and want so badly for things to go back to the way they used to but they can never go back and I hate myself for that
#ill literally ruin every friendship ig#does anyone else experience this bc it’s actually so fucked up I hate it sm#and like im good at pretending it’s ok so even if the other person goes back to normal I never am#it’s like the grudge just stays forever no matter how much forgiveness I logical have#and the association w the person just feels sickening even if they r so full of love#and I think that talking about it will help but it just digs a further hole#like it always get resolved on their end but somehow I feel worse#I’ve lost some of the greatest ppl bc of this :(#like ppl make mistakes#and sometimes it’s not even a mistake or anything wrong im just insane#and then I feel I don’t treat them as well but not in ways they would notice ugh idk im actually fkd#hence I mostly cut them off bc I don’t wanna treat them badly they don’t deserve it#but im also sick of cutting ppl pff who r genuinely so nice and made one off comment#bc I’ve made plenty of off comments im sure bc im human and yet other ppl r ok w it like y can’t I be#anyways usually the whole reason they have even said anything that has put me off them is just their reaction to me being mentally ill#so it kinda all stems from me everytim LOL yay
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No way. No actual fucking way
#I can’t believe it. I can’t believe how much idiocy is ingrained in this country. I’m actually fucking sick.#If you’re a trump supporter please never ever interact with me.#I’m so disgusted with this country. never in my life have I felt so disappointed and ashamed#I’m so fucking sick. genuinely. what the fuck is wrong with this place#the fact that I have to continue living in a place so fundamentally hateful makes me want to tear off my own skin#I hate this country. I hate living here. I hate fearing for me and my families rights.#anyways. I’m sure my posting will slow down for a bit considering I’ve never felt this awful and unsafe in my entire life.#or maybe I’ll start posting excessively to distract myself from everything I don’t even know#to all my fellow trans people I love you all 🫶#and to all poc and women and minorities 🫶 let’s hope we can all stick together and get through this mess
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the way this song absolutely came for love crime by siouxsie sioux’s title as most hannigram song
#like don’t get me wrong love crime is the diva the trailblazer the ICON#but this fucking song#every listen im sick to my stomach#‘you believe me like a god’???#‘ILL DESTROY YOU LIKE I AM’????????#hannibal#nbc hannibal#Spotify#i <3 music!!!!
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once again sorry to everyone for bringing this to your dashboards. but some of you are like, genuinely delirious. not even in a funny way. & i hope you die. i hope we both die. hand in unlovable hand etc etc
#Just so fucking bizarre to me how people can be Like This. there has to be something so wrong with your brain on a fundamental level#i can’t even laugh about this or anything because i genuinely feel pity for these people. it’s so sad to me how you’re gonna be like 20#and then go in a niche tumblr community and create drama over Nothing. over Thin Fucking Air#like do you not have a life? do you not have college? or a job? doesn’t it get tiring? don’t you ever feel ashamed about all this#and the fact that they go and complain about the shipping and the ‘fandombrained’ people as well…. oh my god#how are you going to be TWENTY. and DO THAT. are you seriously sick. ? do you need help#just say you are homophobic and that you hate kids and go. it’ll save everyone a bunch of time for sure#anyways. as someone who has been a rain world fan since 2018. i love you embracing canon. i love you changing canon. i love you disregarding#canon entirely. i love you ships that make sense in canon & that make absolutely zero sense at all. i love you fancharacters that don’t#follow canon rules. i love you ‘cringe’ fancharacters and self inserts. i love you self shipping. i love you oc x canon shipping.#and i love you taking inspiration from designs. i love you community & i love you artists & i love you art#i love you borrowing elements and being inspired and referencing something because you liked it.#are fandoms perfect? GOOD GOD no. is every Fan perfect? no. am i also sometimes annoyed or irrationally pissed off over a ship that#i think is stupid and is illogical. Yes! i’m only human! but i can still love and appreciate the whole CREATIVITY of it all. and the whole#Fun that people are having. i love you having fun. if i don’t like it or if anyone else doesn’t like it they can just Cope#instead of hateposting about it on main and indirectly bullying people who are most likely children. or lgbt. or both#anyways. please continue doing whatever you want. The world is your oyster and you only live on earth once#everyone else can fuck off
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my job is gonna make me start prematurely graying i swear
#i love these kids so dearly but the parents man. they’re too much#it really fucking hurts for them to tell me they don’t think i care about being there for their kid#when i am pouring my whole heart into this job#i never call in sick i keep him safe all day & help him develop life skills & try my hardest#i get kicked & bitten by him regularly and i still adore him#but i’m still not doing enough? they still think i don’t care? it doesn’t make sense to me#it’s easy for them to say that because i work with him at school so they can just assume the worst when something goes wrong#it’s just really disheartening. this is kind of a thankless job & i don’t get paid enough for it either. i only stay cause i love the kids#vent
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sigh…yearning hours
#i’m sick and don’t feel good and it’s making me all mopey and thoughtful#i called out preemptively for tomorrow because i know i won’t be feeling good still#and i just…don’t want to be there#lately i’ve been yearning for something else#something different#i want out of the corporate american grind so badly#i want to wake up and not dread going into a job#i want to garden and make things#i want to create and explore and enjoy this world#not be trapped behind a desk for 9 hours every single day#i spend more of my life at work than with my own fucking wife at my own HOUSE#that’s hellish#my heart and my soul are yearning for freedom and something different#i love the things i’ve worked for…don’t get me wrong#and i understand that there are so many people who have it worse and would kill for a life like mine#but there’s something aching in me#for a life that is not spent behind a desk where i miss my wife and my animals and i just stare outside of my little window longingly#there has to be a better way…right…?
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#I’m burnt out#I’m exhausted#and completely hopeless#how do other people with severe mental health problems live their lives?#was really hoping these programs would kinda get me on the right track#but idk anymore#i desperately need a job#have $3 to my name 🙃#been seeing the ‘insufficient funds’ way too much lately#and don’t get me wrong I’d LOVE to get a job#but how the fuck am I supposed to have time to go to my class and a job#when I don’t even have the motivation/energy to get out of bed most days#also the thought of going somewhere new and interviewing and meeting new people makes me physically sick to my stomach#trying to get back into Instacart but when I worked through them last (no joke 6+ years ago) my account got suspended#and it’s super hard to get it back (I just feel like after so many years you should be deleted off of the data base but whatever)#anyway#it’s 4pm and I’m just getting out of bed 🙃#no clue what to eat and I wouldn’t eat anything but I’m getting a migraine 👌#ok rant over#lmao I’m sure you guys have missed my sad/ pessimistic shut up rosie posts 🤦🏽♀️#shut up rosie
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lowkey. Not over my ex at all
#It’s been months man#And yet I still feel the ever lasting effects#Am k cruel? Manipulative? I don’t think I am but he said I was and I so badly want to believe it#Cuz maybe I’ll actually fix what’s wrong with me and people will actually love me#also s very love sick in the sense that I need someone to be in love with me#But going t4t hasn’t worked out that well for me (cough cough my ex..)#N I don’t wanna fuck up coming out to any cis guys#Which idek if I truly like them or if I’m just so desperate I’ll fall in love with anyone as long as they treat me right#I think one of th things keeping me from getting over him is the fact that he was so affectionate??? And I had gotten so used to that#Constant feeling cuz I never really had it before and now that I don’t have it anymore I don’t know what to do with myself#Not to mention I’m too scared to do all that again because he always wanted more despite my protests#I fucking hate this. How can I be touch starved and repulsed at the same time#I can’t do this shit anymore man. Fuck.#Vent#There r certain people o wish could see this but none of them use tumblr fuck fuck fuck#Me when one had mild crushes on cis guys )okay maybe just one that I don’t even think saw me as a real friend in the one semester k had wit#Him…) but we’re so different and I think he hates me and he’s friends with my friends and ijhhhhwj#I hate hate hate love#Hate being in love. Hate that I can’t be in love. Hate that nobody loves me#I actually cannot take this shit anymore it’s one of the only things that truly ever gets to me anymore
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…what dark ass corner of tiktok did that screenshot come from??
Bro batfam tiktok is so 💀💀💀 maybe I haven’t found my people yet but the way they talk about Damian vs Tim is so fucking tragic “poor Timmy 🥺” this and “dc hates tim Drake 🙄🙄🙄” that like they not only think it’s an unpopular opinion to like him over there, they think he’s written badly SPECIFICALLY to favor damian like…
#listen i love canon tim Drake#if I’m talking shit about him just assume it’s that he loves coffee everyone is out to get him version#however tim Drake fans in general?#like the way they act about him#they act like they get crucified for thinking he’s the best Robin#but whatever this ain’t about him#the point is this is the majority of my batfam fyp and I’m sick#i don’t even comment or like that’s all I get 💀#lbooster tok my beloved 🙏🏾#ok i lied tho i dont#I don’t LOVE canon tim I think he’s ok#i think he’s very very interesting#like hes fun in a what the Fuck is wrong with you I think everyone who meets you should beat you up kinda way#but he’s not like. up there for me#bottom of batfam barrel#i like it when he used to face the consequences of his actions and arrogance#but i feel like they just wanna veer towards ‘he’s the SMART one and he’s always right but nobody listens 💔💔💔😭😭😭😭’#and in Gotham war specifically#like IK theyre fucking with everyone but I’m biased against tim so it made me dislike him more#one of my#mutuals called him a wishy washy mf and I’m still dying
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#I have so much I want to say but nothing I can actually articulate#how do I make you see how much you’re hurting me? how do I make you see how much I love you at the same time?#you grew a conscience too little too late and I was left to hang for it#I keep trying to be who you want but it feels like there’s no version of me that will make you happy#and I feel the distance growing between us every day because of how you’re pushing me away#but still you’ll say everything is fine and I just have to accept things the way they are#it doesn’t matter what I say or do because everything I say/do is always wrong in your eyes#I’m always fucking things up somehow and making you angry#so it’s at the point where I just have to stifle my feelings and swallow my pride and try to keep you happy#do you remember how we became friends? you reached out to me to help me with my anxiety from a post you stumbled across#but I feel that now if I were to share any of those kinds of feelings with you I’d be mostly ignored or it would start another fight#how can you say you’re always supportive when there’s no way to talk to you when I really need you because you’re simply not here?#how can you be mad at me for wanting more time with you when there are days you only send me one message and nothing else?#and still the thought of losing you hurts so much that I’d rather just concede to whatever you want#I’d rather let you crush me and dictate how our whole relationship will go than see you walk away from me#I know that’s so unhealthy but I don’t care anymore because I just need you that much#I hate this stupid connection we seem to have and how we’re still so drawn to each other even when we’re hurt and angry#it would be so much easier if you were just some guy I could block#but you’re not because you’ve become my best friend and that in itself is so horribly pathetic it makes me sick#I just can’t get these thoughts out and so I feel sick and anxious and I just want to sleep this all away#how do I say any of this to you? i don’t think I could really#personal
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nothing pisses me off more than how figure skating reporters/news will constantly and intentionally leave out important details of stories in order to produce ragebait for people who don’t know anything about figure skating
#like i’m sorry but surya bonaly is NOT the hill you want to die on.#they banned backflips BEFORE SHE WAS EVEN COMPETING because guess what!#USFSA/ISU doesn’t want to deal with skaters breaking their fucking necks and dying on live tv!#or make young skaters feel like they Have To Learn how to do it and then fucking dying because of how INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS it is.#dont get me wrong figure skating is conservative and racist as fuck and surya bonaly faced some pretty horrific racism in her career#but banning the backflip had absolutely nothing to do with her and everything to do about not having skaters fucking die#also i’m not sorry but her edgework fucking sucked. like her jumps were incredible i can’t lie but her edges were. painful to watch at best#see also: everything regarding the sambo 70 and eteri#i am so sick and fucking tired of seeing people who don’t skate just hype up these incredible abused teenagers and hail them like gods#they don’t need fame they need HELP and eteri needs to be in fucking JAIL for what she’s done to SO MANY KIDS#i hope this sport gets more boring!! i hope i see less quads and less teenagers!!#what i want to see is competitive skaters who are still able to skate when they’re 25+ because their training was healthy and genuine#i want to see good technique and clean lutz edges and no full blade assistance on toe jumps bc thats what will save your joints#i want to see skaters with muscle and fat who have healthy relationships w/ food and their bodies and are stronger for it#this sport is so fucked. it’s a joke. i love skating but i wish i never had to interact with the community around it#ESPECIALLY those who have never gone through the sport themselves. stop getting off on abused children and start advocating for SAFETY#rosie speaks
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sorry but the way a single interaction w my mom ruined any kind of progress I made this week is insane
#I started taking my meds again for one#she walked in the kitchen after work today and immediately proceeded to tell me I did everything wrong and basically made me feel so fucking#stupid. all I’m doing is tryna do something nice and cute for this stupid holiday bc everything else in my life is falling apart#but I should be used to it I mean just a few weeks ago she essentially admitted she thinks I’m doing nothing with my life#even though she uses me for photo ops and as a way to get attention from her coworkers and friends#bc she LOVES to brag about me she adores it even#but behind closed doors it’s ‘how can I put alex down today?’#misgenders fatshames tells me I’m lazy despite having almost 3 degrees doesn’t take any of my medical issues seriously#even tho she’s the reason I went so late before I got diagnosed (she doesn’t want a sick kid! how Tragic for her)#I’m TIRED like I’m tired of not being able to do anything right ??? and like I’m sorry I know there’s more important things going on in the#world right now but my irl stuff was such a non issue for real alongside it and now it’s like#all of the ideation is back I feel like. yeah what is the point in doing anything I don’t do anything right anyway#sorry I’m just. venting#mrow.org
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seeing someone who ships batcest deals psychic damage- I DONT MAKE THE RULES
#i saw a reblog and went to their account all innocent and click on one of their posts bc i loved their tags#i regret it#so much#TIM AND JASON WOULD NEVER GET TOGETHER WHAT ARE YOU THINKING#MAKES ME SICK WTF#seeing Bruce and Dick??? WTFWTFWTFWTFWTF#🤮🤮🤮🤮#anti batcest#DO YALL NOT HAVE SIBLINGS???#DO U FEEL SHAME???#being adopted doesn’t make any less of siblings and i don’t think the wrongness of that idea is addressed ENOUGH#i actually kinda take personal offense at that idea#i’m not adopts shut i have family members who are#and the idea that they’re less of family bc they’re adopted? it’s v upsetting to me#not to mention the fucking AGE GAPS AND ALL THE WRONGNESS IN GENERAL
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my dad might have fucking covid. about to jump off a bridge
#purrs#he was unmasked in my future room with the contractors yesterday and one of them woke up sick this morning and stayed in bed all day and now#my dad is feeling sick and my mom isn’t even better yet and i just saw so many people (WHO ARE VULNERABLE / HAVE VULNERABLE FAMILY MEMBERS)#in the last couple of days and now i might have exposed them. i am about to LOSE my shit. i need all respiratory diseases to die immediately#i am TIRED of living in constant fear. and i am FURIOUS at my dad for not wearing a mask.#like do you people NOT FUCKING GET IT. You may be cavalier. you may say you don’t care if you get it you can fight it off. BUT YOU INTERACT#WITH OTHER PEOPLE. who may not WANT to get sick. Who may not be able to DURVIVE getting sick. WHAT IS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND. if you see#someone wearing a mask they are doing that FOR A REASON!!!! TO PROTECT THEMSELVES!!!!! TO PROTECT THEIR LOVED ONES!!!!! so fucking WEAR ONE#OUT OF COURTESY! USE YOUR FUCKING BRAIN! i don’t care if they’re hard to breathe in. I don’t care if they’re uncomfortable. I don’t care if#it’s your own house and you’re not used to it. SUCK IT UP. you can be uncomfortable for five minutes. you KNOW how anxious we all are about#getting covid and you DIRECTLY endanger us and now i might have put other people in danger. and i didn’t even choose it I didn’t do anything#wrong. FUCK COVID. fuck this collective punishment nightmare. I am SO TIRED of living in constant fear because OTHER PEOPLE want to pretend#it’s over. it fucking ISNT. there are things I care about. there are people I care about. and if you were a decent fucking human being you#would understand that and MASK UP. not everyone gets to be so glib about it. it’s hard enough being seen as fucking insane and still taking#damage from having basicaly 0 social life because im too afraid to go anywhere or do anything it’s harder when people around me who i can’t#help but interact with exhibit that they do not actually care about how it is improtant to me that i do not get sick or get my loved ones#sick ESPECIALLY when it is my loved one himself who KNOWS how scared shitless we all are. it fucking hurts so bad. fuck covid. FUCK covid.#delete later#like. despair. i can wear my n95 mask all i want but i am still fucking HELPLESS when people around me don’t. despair. DESPAIR.
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