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muchi13kitty · 1 month ago

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Name: Fake Mead❁w

(His real name is Eddie)

Age: 118

Birthday: May 19 Gender: Girl ♀

She measure: 1.75cm Weight: 55kg

She speaks: Mexican 100%

(she speaks it very nice)

English 90%

Japanese 5% (when he speaks japanese his becomes like cinnamoroll from sanrio)

Italian 20%

She is half: Jack Russell terrier, abyssinian kitten, axolotl, weddell seal and a Little bit of human

powers: electrocute (only sometimes electrocutes) multiply (that is, make a million clones of himself) with his plasma from his hand he can launch a large rainbow thunder with butterfly sweet flowers kompeitō and cute things (something like things from Sanrio) he can also Heal anyone like their hug can also explode like a nuclear bomb. Those who have butterflies, many colors, flowers, etc. but it can start an apocalypse of joy where everything becomes beautiful, colorful and cheerful and can read your mind only sometimes can become is a lion called Shido that only turns into a lion on October 27 and ends on November 5

her skills: Fake Meadow knows how to play the trumpet, the saxophone, the violin and the piano she learns very quickly she knows how to cook very well she knows how to fly in her an old umbrella (yes she has an old umbrella but it allows her to fly very high like an airplane) she knows kung fu and taekwondo with 2 taekwondo kicks he is destroying you your face he can change on the walls and the ceiling he knows how to escape from trees and land on his feet like a cat he has the nose of a dog and knows a lot about smells he can smell blood like sharks if he If you cut off a leg or an arm, someone will quickly believe him. He knows many remedies to cure you. He can talk to animals and can understand any language, even alien language. His fangs have poison with a single crunch. You can die. He sometimes sucks a little blood knows how to do Morse code or sign language knows a lot about mathematics has an elephant's memory, that is, having a memorable memory capacity, being able to not forget anything knows how to write with cursive letters and can turn its head like an owl she can revive plants and flowers with a single touch She can dodge anything without making any movement and she has good aim, meaning she can hit anything from a distance she can break many things with her head she can break can make magic dust that can make anything fly up to the ticket box She knows how to do super epic parkour, she dances very cool, she can even break dance, she can also climb a rainbow and also find the end of the rainbow Fake Meadow can also turn into a can if a machine crushes her she will turn into a can.

You can tame with: heart-shaped cookies with jams candy-shaped candy and heart-shaped gummies (It's her favorite snacks)

She eats: apples carrots cucumbers bones I know of human animal or creatures frogs candy Taro waffles cookies meat pizza tortillas tacos tortilla chips nopales chops beef head hearts pears shrimp bread nachos grasshoppers (I'm from Mexico and here she eats grasshoppers like a snack) oranges grapes watermelon lemons (Fake Meadow doesn't taste sour to a lemon, it's like she's eating candy) pineapple piranhas fish sandwiches jam honey mangoes papayas prickly pears dragon fruit peanuts acorns hot sauces corn sunflowers pumpkins kiwi strawberries etc.

some facts about her: Fake Meadow has a skull and her skull is super hard and impossible to break something like the Pachycephalosaurus Fake Meadow likes to hug others and her hug is so relaxing that she can calm you down Fake Meadow is very kind and friendly no she has enemies, he is like a capybara, he also has great intelligence that has even surpassed a robot. Fake Meadow smells like flowers, honey and strawberries. Fake Meadow is very fast, he runs like a bullet in the air and he also knows how to fight very nice. Fake Meadow is an expert swimmer and can even live in water without any problem. Fake Meadow eats piranhas. Fake Meadow has two hearts, one is made with lollipops and the other is a realistic heart that marks the life of fake Meadow and we kill it and tear it out. Acquire two hearts, a virus will be activated like a zombie, only this is the virus of the joy (based on a Gumball episode that is my favorite) Fake Meadow becomes a kind of happy zombie Another thing if there is a zombie apocalypse and a zombie bites Fake Meadow she won't become one Fake Meadow's blood is pink with glitter and tastes very sweet like a caprisun his pink eye allows him to see lost things and dangerous things. no boss can't defeat Fake Meadow because of his great kindness

Her blue bow looks like candy but that bow serves as a key that can open something

This pair of giant cotton balls are called "Mopon~ ÑOM" they are very cute and one of the two has a bell inside but it is impossible to know which is which and which is not sometimes it rings on one side other times on the other but oh well These also have feelings and can be prey the same as Fake Meadow

It has a pocket that can store many things Fake Meadow in its pocket It has bandages Band-Aids It also has 2000s flip phone It also has a piece of Metal and a tentacle (Please remember these two objects) and Chips for robots. A curious fact about Fake Meadow is that every time he picks up something metallic or a robot, Fake Meadow gets sad and feels very nostalgic.

Inside his Fake Meadow chest he has a very powerful element that is kindness, it looks something like this

Fake Meadow belongs to the "Flower Clan" she is the boss who can be whatever she wants and make her own rules there no one will do you any harm unless you are a person like Pizzahead because you can stay like that

Fake Meadow hates people like pizzahead

Meadow canssidy she loves Fake Meadow very much because she is his best friend

THE LIFE OF THE FAKE MEADOW

In an abandoned laboratory lived a mad scientist who was a Lesbian and her name was Tesshi (Tesshi looks like Pizzahead) One day she wanted to do something new, so in a cloning machine she put a lot of Glitter. Powdered sugar, a lot of gum, a little Meadow's hair, tired human blood, human eyes, axolotl veins, a small drop of baby Weddell seal blood and finally a Jack Russell terrier puppy and an Abyssinian kitten When Fake Meadow came out of the cloning machine Tesshi named her D-234 the first few days Tesshi loved Fake Meadow but then Tesshi became crazier than she already was and started torturing Fake Meadow

torture 1: Beatings torture 2: Electrocuted torture 3: Stretch muscles torture 4: Beaten with whips torture 5: electric water or hot water like lava torture 6: Tests like rabbits torture 7: they gave him knives to swallow torture 8: dog muzzle torture 9: abuse (she was abused once a month) Tesshi forced Fake Meadow to do something she didn't want

a Fake Meadow fell into the depths of the abandoned laboratory where he lived

but a giant octopus appeared accompanied by a rabbit with robotic parts because of experiments that attacked Fake Meadow but Fake Meadow hugged the giant octopus and they became best friends every afternoon Fake Meadow went to play with her two best friends one they decided give names but they all had names from experiments the octopus was named milan the rabbit Ray and Fake Meadow Eddie but one day Millan fell ill with a mysterious illness Fake Meadow tried to revive him but it was too late and two minutes later Ray died and with a painful heart Fake Meadow tore a tentacle from Milan and tore a piece of metal from Ray to remember his friends. 2 best friends One night Fake Meadow had a deep dream where she was in a field, flowers, clouds, etc.(it was the direct path to heaven) but Tesshi was electrocuting Fake Meadow one day Tesshi made a mixture that had a lot of chlorine acid shampoo and other things Fake Meadow had a plan to escape from that place the plan was going well but Fake Meadow tripped on a screw and Tesshi was able to catch her and Tesshi injected the strange mixture into her eye and her eye turned pink and the vision became increasingly blurry and bloody. Then Tesshi put Fake Meadow to sleep and performed an operation, he opened Fake Meadow's chest and Tesshi put a clock in Fake's heart. That clock seems to Fake Meadow to be her state of life and so Fake Meadow was tortured for 15 years. Tesshi hurt her Fake Meadow for Love one day Meadow canssidy entered the abandoned laboratory and when Meadow was fighting Tesshi Fake Meadow told Meadow to please get her out of that damn hell Meadow canssidy save Fake Meadow and that damn place and they became best friends

THE END.

Another fact about fake Meadow is that she went to heaven 19 times but then came back alive

#star super adventures 2017 #Fake Meadow #D-234

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fettesans · 2 years ago

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Top, screen capture from BROS BEFORE, directed by Henry Hanson, 2023. Via. Bottom, Julia Scher, Mama Bed, 2003, Bedstead, steel, wood, foam, plastic, 2 monitors, 2 surveillance cameras, VHS player, VHS tapes, cables, bed sheets, books, leather whip, Dimensions variable. Via.

A sweating body already offers a show of erotic repulsion and attraction. The body’s primordial temptation to cover itself with its secretions. A mere trickle of water flowing over a smooth stone is enough to make it erotic. Everything that slides evokes sexual pleasure, even the wind. Sliding would thus seem to be the source of all pleasure, and perhaps of meaning.

Jean Baudrillard, from Cool Memories, 1987. Via.

Stirred not only by men but by women, fat and thin, naked and clothed; by teenagers and children in latency; by animals such as horses and dogs; by certain vegetables such as carrots, zucchinis, eggplants, and cucumbers; by fruits such as melons, grapefruits, and kiwis; by certain plant parts such as petals, sepals, stamens, and pistils; by the bare arm of a wooden chair, a round vase holding flowers, a little hot sunlight, a plate of pudding, a person entering a tunnel in the distance, a puddle of water, a hand alighting on a smooth stone, a hand alighting on a bare shoulder, a naked tree limb; by anything curved, bare, and shining, as the limb or bole of a tree; by any touch, as the touch of a stranger handling money; by anything round and freely hanging, as tassels on a curtain, as chestnut burrs on a twig in spring, as a wet tea bag on its string; by anything glowing, as a hot coal; anything soft or slow, as a cat rising from a chair; anything smooth and dry, as a stone, or warm and glistening; anything sliding, anything sliding back and forth; anything sliding in and out with an oiled surface, as certain machine parts, anything of a certain shape, like the state of Florida; anything pounding, anything stroking; anything bolt upright, anything horizontal and gaping, as a certain sea anemone; anything warm, anything wet, anything wet and red, anything turning red, as the sun at evening; anything wet and pink, anything long and straight with a blunt end, as a pestle; anything coming out of anything else, as a snail from its shell, as a snail’s horns from its head; anything opening; any stream of water running, any stream running, any stream spurting, any stream spouting; any cry, any soft cry, any grunt; anything going into anything else, as a hand searching in a purse; anything clutching, anything grasping; anything rising, anything tightening or filling, as a sail; anything dripping, anything hardening, anything softening.

Lydia Davis, In This Condition, from from Almost No Memory, 2001.

#diptych #bed filmed #quotes

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beautifulwillfulldead · 1 year ago

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[ID: Fanart of The Lord of the Rings. Bilbo Baggins is sitting on a little wooden bench outside of Bag End, surrounded by his green garden. He has his eyes closed and is smoking a pipe, which is giving off a few smoke rings. He is wearing a white shirt under a green vest, and brown trousers. One foot is crossed and resting on his knee. The round green door to Bag End is behind him, with little round windows with green stained glass in geometric shapes on either side of the door. The roof is a green hedge with little red berries growing off to the right side. Next to the berries are little steps leading up to the roof, with more in the foreground. To the left of the roof is a big tree. The sky is blue with white clouds.

In front of the door are several bushes with yellow flowers growing on it, as well as a garden patch with big leaves growing out of the dirt. A round, barrel-shaped wooden mailbox on a pole stands next to Bilbo. To the right of the door is a wheelbarrow with huge carrots, parsnips, and a basket of onions in it. In front of the wheelbarrow are two large pumpkins, one white and one orange, a basket of white vegetables with big green leaves, a basket of cucumbers, and a basket of lettuce. There is a white sack with a brown logo on the ground, possibly seeds. There is grass and growing green leaves everywhere throughout the garden. End ID]

mornings in the shire

#the vibes....🥰🥰 so peaceful #bilbo baggins #lotr #lotr art #described

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whiskeynovember · 1 year ago

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so, I'll say it took about 3 days to get the garden back in some kind of order, but not without casualties (some of which I committed myself when I returned. 😂)

in plot 2, the eggplants, purple basil, and peppers look great. radishes in the center of the peppers are taking shape. Bok Choi a little slow to sprout, but sprouting nonetheless. I'd like to add more, tbh, it's just hard to maneuver around.

I pulled the carrots too soon, and then tried to put them back. 😆 we'll see if it works (i should water them, now, actually). I also planted more carrots in 2 rows. not the rainbow carrots this time, but I might plant more once I pull the squash.

the squash is haggard. as are the long beans. as is the stevia. I cut the squash vine to the last fruit and I need to just prune what dies off. the long beans still have some life, but also need a decent pruning, tbh. I need to pull the stevia and pot it. I'll work on getting either the 7 or 10 gallon grow bag ready. I cut a lot of flowers yesterday, but I should have enough left for some seeds.

Plot 1 is doing ok. planted more Chinese cabbage and mesclun greens, got rid of a few tomato plants, and trimmed some basil. the holy basil is doing really well in ground. even the one that was tattered is stable. also, the beefsteak is finally doing something. A little late, but I plan to leave it in ground to overwinter anyway.

moved the 2 cherry peppers over to where the serrano seeds were. lost 2 of those so I have 2 left and one isn't looking hot, so I hope it will be a little easier to manage being out from under the squash leaves. the peppers are... peppering. even though that fat ass caterpillar fucked up my biggest jalapeno plant.

again, trimmed the squash down and need to continue pruning. the Cucamelon plant is going ham. need to continue training it to go up it's pole. same with the cucumbers, I'd like to keep them separate for as long as possible.

my poppy bushes are too cute for words. I kinda wish I could be assed to train it to go along the border of the house.

the potted plants are ok, but I need to figure out what's going on with the black diamond watermelon and yellow squash. neither are doing great. I think aphids and... who knows.

as for the potted herbs, well, not bad. mostly pruning, clipped some chocolate mint, some fucked up strawberry leaves (hopefully I caught the worms that have been having a field day.) and threw a few more purple basil seeds in the pot... just because. lol.

Sent my brother a list of seeds I have so hopefully I can send some to him by the end of the week.

tomorrow should be easy. pull the stevia, prune the beans and squash. should probably also pot the eggplants that I have in cups.

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puzzlesprintcom · 2 years ago

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The Difference Between Fruits and Vegetables: Explained

We are excited to announce our latest addition to our collection of wooden jigsaw puzzles – Fruits and Vegetables, Nouveau Larousse Illustre puzzle. This beautiful puzzle features a vintage poster of fruits and vegetables with names of each fruit and vegetable. With its vibrant colors and intricate details, this puzzle is sure to be a hit with puzzle enthusiasts of all ages. But, before we delve into the details of our new puzzle, let us take a moment to talk about fruits and vegetables in general.

How Many Fruits Are There?

Fruits come in many shapes, sizes, and colors. From apples to pineapples and everything in between, there are over 2000 types of fruits in the world. While not all fruits are available in every part of the world, there are still many options to choose from. What Fruits Are Good for Diabetics? For people with diabetes, it is important to choose fruits that are low in sugar and high in fiber. Some examples of fruits that are good for diabetics include berries, citrus fruits, apples, and pears. What Fruits Have Protein? While fruits are not typically known for their protein content, some fruits do contain small amounts of protein. Examples include guava, kiwi, and passionfruit. What Is the Difference Between Fruits and Vegetables? Fruits and vegetables are often confused with one another, but there is a clear distinction between the two. Fruits are the mature ovaries of flowering plants and contain seeds, while vegetables are any other part of the plant that is edible, such as leaves, stems, and roots. How to Steam Vegetables? Steaming is a healthy way to cook vegetables as it helps to retain their nutrients. To steam vegetables, place them in a steamer basket over boiling water and cover with a lid. Cook until tender, but still firm. What Are Starchy Vegetables? Starchy vegetables are those that contain higher amounts of carbohydrates and are often used as a substitute for grains. Examples include potatoes, sweet potatoes, and corn. What Vegetables Are in Season? Eating seasonal vegetables ensures that you get the freshest and most nutritious produce available. In the spring, look for asparagus, artichokes, and peas. In the summer, enjoy tomatoes, cucumbers, and zucchini. In the fall, savor pumpkins, butternut squash, and beets. How to Saute Vegetables? Sautéing is a quick and easy way to cook vegetables. Heat a little oil in a pan over medium-high heat, add your vegetables, and stir-fry until tender and lightly browned. What Are Root Vegetables? Root vegetables are those that grow underground and are an excellent source of vitamins and minerals. Examples include carrots, turnips, and parsnips. We hope you enjoyed this little detour into the world of fruits and vegetables. Remember, a healthy diet rich in fruits and vegetables can help prevent chronic diseases and promote overall health and wellness. And, don't forget to try our new Fruits and Vegetables, Nouveau Larousse Illustre puzzle – a fun way to learn more about the many different types of fruits and vegetables available, check out our other Cool Puzzles as well. Read the full article

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neurodiverse-adulthood · 3 years ago

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Forbidden snacks unforbidden

Disclaimer: do not eat anything you are allergic, intolerant, or sensitive to! Moderate your diet according to your needs. Seek a dietician's help with this if needed.

CTRL + F to search for keywords in the list

* = only taste safe-- not meant to be eaten straight but eating a little won't kill you

Bar soap: avocado, banana, mango, dried papaya, peach, pear, ice, cereal, cheese, peanut butter oat balls, giant pretzels/pretzel bites/pretzel bun, crackers, steamed rice cake, butter, flan, cake, chocolate bar/melts, candy melts, gum*, candy corn, freeze dried ice cream, popsicles, taffy, Charleston Chews, tootsie rolls, fondant, valentine heart candies, Rice Krispie treats

Bone, teeth, metal: white foods, silver foods, bone/tooth-shaped foods, ice, raw baby carrots, almonds, walnuts, other nuts, frozen fruit/vegetables, ribs, chicken legs, bone-in wings, T-bone steak, uncooked pasta, edible tree bark, edible skins/shells of some foods, pretzel sticks, cereal, cookie straws, candy canes, valentine message heart candies, Takis, hard candy, snowcone, suckers/lollipops, chocolate coins, Whoppers candy, frozen chocolate/candy, popsicles

Chalk, coal, makeup: Parmesan cheese, spices, seasoning, puffed rice cakes, cereal, powdered/icing sugar, edible sands, drink flavoring, ground up crackers/chips/cookies, Whoppers candy, smarties, sweet tarts, mints, freeze dried ice cream, sprinkles, fun dip, pixie stix, cotton candy, valentine message heart candies, mints

Cosmetic creams, whipped soap, spackle: yogurt, peanut/etc butter, cream cheese, sour cream, hummus, condiments, butter, thick drink, Nutella, frosting, whipped cream, ice cream, pudding, candy gel, marshmallow fluff

Dice, marbles, coins, trinkets: ice, polyhedral candy, frozen peas, frozen fruit, banana chips, other dried fruit, Kix/Cap'n Crunch/Cocoa Puffs, Lucky Charms, other cereal, cheese cubes, snacks shaped like trinkets, mini pepperonis, seed beads, jawbreakers, Whoppers candy, jolly ranchers, candy shaped like trinkets, chocolate chips, Tic Tacs, mints, decorative sugar pieces, valentine message heart candies, sugar cubes, candy coins, candy legos/bricks, gum*

Dog/pet treats: foods cut into bone/fish/etc shapes, banana, blueberries, sweet potato, dried fruit, deli meat, fish, red meat, bacon, pepperoni, poultry, bread, pasta, crackers, Cheerios, Rice Krispies cereal, other cereal, human-safe dog treats, cookies, oatmeal, peanut butter oat balls, granola, jerky, Slim Jims, cooked bugs or worms, mints, gummies, sprinkles

Dough, clay, puddy: mashed potatoes, sweet potato, avocado, peanut/other butter, peanut butter oat balls, noodles/pasta, gravy, pancakes, fondant, yogurt dough, Kool-Aid dough, cocoa dough, peeps playdoh, Nutella dough, peanut/etc butter dough, warm chocolate, warm candy corn, taffy, egg-free cookie dough, ice cream, thick frosting, Charleston Chews, caramels, marshmallow fluff

Fabric, foam/sponge, slowrise squishies: peach, apple, pear, cucumber, watermelon, dried fruit, puffed rice cakes, Chinese steamed rice cakes, bread, pita bread, muffins, shredded jerky, giant soft pretzels, Rice Krispies, cake, donuts, pancakes/waffles, fondant, soft cookies, freeze dried ice cream, pop tart bites, cotton candy, marshmallow, dried apple

Glitter: cake luster dust, crushed/ground ice, warmed sugar, crushed/ground hard candy

Glitter bottles, potions, glowsticks, cleaning products: cake luster dust in any beverage, edible fluorescent colorant in any beverage, citrus juice, water with lemon, water with orange, water with grapefruit, water with other citrus fruit, dyed beverage

Inedible plants and flowers: lettuce, spinach, kale, cabbage, peas, carrots, corn, pumpkin, other veggies, watermelon, peach, apple, mango, banana, dragonfruit, pineapple, grapes, cherries, strawberries, other fruits, dried fruits, skins of some fruits/vegetables, mushrooms, seeds, nuts, herbal tea, dandelions, other edible flowers, herb seasonings, edible tree bark, breath strips, edible rice paper, edible sugar paper, edible money wafers, edible grass candy, cotton candy, gushers, wax bottle soda candies, decorative sugar pieces, gel/juice-filled gummies/candy, gel/juice-filled gum*, shredded gum*

Jelly soap: peaches, other fruit, dried papaya, pumpkin, jelly/jam, gummies, Jell-O, agar, candy gel, gel/juice-filled gummies/candy, gel/juice-filled gum*, gum*, edible/xylitol-based toothpaste*

Lava, liquid soap, molten glass, wax: hot drink, thick drink, soup, oatmeal, sauce, gravy, dip, dipping/nacho cheese, honey, nectar, jelly/jam, condiments, beverage flavoring syrups, soda/juice, syrup, pudding, caramel, melted candy/chocolate, melted butter, candy gel, edible/xylitol-based toothpaste*, fondant, milk duds, gum*

Lipstick, candles: cheese, Baby Bell cheese, butter, avocado, mango, dried mango, dried papaya, banana, raisins, pepperoni, pasta, gummies, wax bottle soda candies, candy melts, chocolate melts, frozen pudding, fruit rollups, gushers, marshmallow, fondant, starburst, candy corn, pudding, taffy, tootsie rolls, milk duds, candy buttons, jolly ranchers, Charleston Chews, candy gel, valentine message heart candies, caramels, gum*

Mochi squishies, silicone/rubber, fungi: peaches, pears, avocado, dried mango, dried papaya, mushrooms, eggs, beans, tongue, fish, medium red meat, other meats, dried fruit, noodles/pasta, dumplings, cheese, yogurt, Chinese steamed rice cakes, butter, seed beads, cheese curds, gummies, caramels, taffy, tootsie rolls, marshmallow, milk duds, Charleston Chews, candy gel, agar, gum*

Orbeez, animal eggs: eggs, peas, blueberries, grapes, baby tomatoes, peaches, acini di pepe/pastina, boba, dippin dots, gummies, Jell-O, agar, seed beads, mini marshmallows, gumballs*, candy buttons, milk duds, Kix cereal

Paint, ink, makeup, glue: soup, sauces, gravy, dip, peanut/etc butter, honey, nectar, syrup, caramel, condiments, cream cheese, sour cream, frosting, icing, whipped cream, ice cream, dyed beverage, pie filling, pudding, candy gel, melted candy/chocolate

Paper and cardboard: skins of some fruits/vegetables, iceberg lettuce, spinach, kale, cabbage, puffed rice cakes, Kix, Cheerios, Rice Krispies cereal, other cereal, breath strips, edible rice/sugar paper, edible money wafers, crackers, ice cream cone, pizzelle, fruit rollups, fruit by the foot, frozen chocolate, frozen pudding, freeze dried ice cream

Pills and medicine: ice, beans, nuts, seeds, frozen peas, frozen blueberries, corn, acini di pepe/pastina, rice, cereal, soda/juice, dyed beverage, empty gelatin/edible capsules, jellybeans, jolly ranchers, Tic Tacs, mints, Mike n Ike's, sweet tarts pills, nerds, gushers, smarties, sweet tarts, valentine message heart candies, sprinkles, small hard candies, gel/juice-filled gummies/candy, gel/juice-filled gum*, fake blood capsules*

Pottery, ceramic, porcelain: nuts, seeds, ice, dried fruit, avocado, banana, cheese, puffed rice cakes, granola, cereal, pancakes/waffles, bread, crackers, pita chips, pita bread, uncooked pasta, uncooked Ramen, Ice Chips, ice cream cone, pizzelle, frozen chocolate/candy, frozen pudding, freeze dried ice cream, popsicles, cookies, Whoppers candy, smarties, sweet tarts, mints, chocolate bar, valentine message heart candies, edible rice/sugar paper, edible money wafers, hard candy, mints

Rocks, crystals, beads: nuts, seeds, ice, table salt, beans, tea, jerky bites, meat chunks, acini di pepe/pastina, couscous, cheese cubes, uncooked Ramen, popcorn, popsicles, crystallized honey, jelly/jam, frozen honey/syrup, dyed beverage, boba, mints, crushed crackers/cookies, chocolate rocks, crystal sticks, freeze dried ice cream, jawbreakers/gobstoppers, nerds, hard candy, decorative sugar pieces, Cheerios, other cereal, sprinkles, jellybeans, chocolate chips, candy legos/bricks, ring pops, dippin dots, crystal/rock sugar, sugar cubes, frozen chocolate/candy, jolly ranchers, suckers/lollipops, ring pops, gum*, Whoppers candy, dippin dots, valentine message heart candies, seed beads, candy necklace, candy bracelet, mints

Sand and soil: couscous, quinoa, rice, poppy seeds, other small seeds, Parmesan cheese, spices, seasoning, edible fake dirt, ground up cereal, ground up crackers/chips/cookies, brown sugar sand, flour sand*, Kool-Aid sand, crumbled cake, sugar, powdered/icing sugar, pixie stix, fun dip, ground up hard candy, crushed Whoppers candy

Sea glass, plastic, resin/rosin: ice, Ice Chips, uncooked pasta, iceberg lettuce, cucumber, watermelon, chips, pita chips, crackers, sorbetto/flavored ice, frozen honey/syrup, caramels, popsicles, breath strips, mints, edible rice/sugar paper, edible money wafers, jolly ranchers, fruit rollups, fruit by the foot, crystal sticks, crystal/rock sugar, fondant, clear suckers/lollipops, clear hard candy, crushed hard candy, mints

Slime, puddy: thick soup, thick beverage, melted/liquid cheese, sauce, gravy, jelly/jam, dip, yogurt, edible oobleck*, fondant, candy gel, Jell-O, Nutella slime, pudding slime, pizza slime, seed slime, syrup slime, psyllium slime*, starburst slime, chocolate slime (1-2-3-4-5), bubblegum slime, Kool-aid slime, milk slime, taffy, caramels, egg-free cookie dough, gum*, edible doughs, marshmallow fluff

Tide pods: seaweed water pouch/bubble/bottle, baby tomatoes, peas, grapes, blueberries, pb&j, Uncrustables, gushers, pop tart bites, gummies, mentos, wax bottle soda candies, jelly donut holes, Reese's, Jell-O, tide pod jello shots, tootsie pops, gel/juice-filled gummies/candy, gel/juice-filled gum*

Wood: ice, uncooked pasta, edible tree bark, edible tree bark tea, pine/tree tea, puffed rice cakes, granola, almonds, pine/tree nuts, other nuts, seeds, sunflower seeds with shell, poppy seeds, dried fruit, jerky, uncooked pasta, uncooked Ramen, chips, crackers, waffle cone, Kit Kat's, Twix, pretzels, pretzel chips, cookie straws, ochre, canned bamboo, canned sugar cane

Yarn, string, wire: spaghetti squash, pumpkin, shredded fruits/vegetables, grated fruits/vegetables, banana, pulled pork, celery, honey sticks, string cheese, shredded/grated cheese, noodles/pasta, Ramen, mozzarella sticks, jerky, hot pizza, shredded gum*, Spaghettieis, sour straws, nerds ropes, gummy worms, cotton candy, fruit by the foot, fondant strands, edible candy grass

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dvsconocvdo · 6 months ago

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Today was her day off which meant that Amrita had slept in (for the first time in two weeks), and had decided that all she was going to do was garden, play with her pet bunnies, and do laundry. Coming to Out of Stalk felt like coming to her second home. Engulfed by the scent of dirt and surrounded by vegetable patches, she truly felt at ease. There weren't many occasions were she came across other people in her gardening down time, but she was pleasantly surprised to see someone nourishing his plants with such kind words. She too spoke to her plants, she found that it was rather quaint company. So, the young witch did her best to stay quiet as she passed by plants that weren't hers, she used a big of earth manipulation to help a few sad plants before landing next to Royce. It was rather hard to swallow down the innate nervousness that filled Amrita by being next to the advisor, but she did her best to contain it. After all, right now they were just two gardeners.

In her own journey to shove down her nervousness, she completely missed the presence of the bee. It was rather easy for Amrita to let animal thoughts or feelings to dwell in the back of her mind especially little insects. "No, you're not crowding them at all. I didn't want to interrupt you." She offered a well practiced smile before kneeling into the floor. One of her two pairs of jeans was used exclusively for moments like this, and hence the fabric surrounding her knees was always darker due to the dirt stains. "Some Jwala chili, cherry tomatoes, lettuce, and a bit of basil." She notified him with a proud smile. "I see you have some tomatoes too! Are we going to have a tomato show off? See which one is the best?" She joked before giggling, shaking her head at her own words. "I wanted to do carrots, but didn't have enough space. I also want to try to go eggplants or cucumbers next year. Even my little garden at my balcony is getting crowded."

Just then she heard it, the faint buzzing of a bee. Amrita turned away from Royce in the direction to the bee. "It looks like there's a little friend nearby." She whispered, hand reaching out as she used her powers more intentionally, calling the bee towards her. "When did you start gardening? If I can ask. Have you grown tomatoes before? I always try to grow something new in each season. I even try to make it work without using my powers." If she wanted to, she could make every plant in her garden grow and bear fruit regardless of the season, but Amrita liked the process. She enjoyed waiting. She enjoyed letting nature take its natural course with her garden. Some times she lost plants or flowers, other times they bloomed beautiful, and other times they bore fruit in all shapes and sizes. It could be an unexpected process if she didn't involve herself. A time of unpredictability that made her expectant.

setting: out of stalk, one sunny afternoon

featuring: royce van doren iii & open @lunarcovestarters

“Look at you,” he said in a low voice, fingers delicately brushing over the leaves and yellow flowers of a tomato plant. “You’re coming along well, I can already tell you’re going to yield the most delicious fruit this year.” He’d been a faithful member to the town garden, taking care of various veggies, fruits, and plants whenever he was home. It was the one place where he didn’t mind stains on his nice clothes, wearing then a thick canvas apron with gardening shears and other tools tucked into its large pockets to protect his crisp white dress shirt from being dirtied. The knees of his gray slacks were already dark from being pressed against the side of the garden box, though he didn’t mind. He had his sleeves rolled up, hands glove free as dirt crept under his finger nails, checking on the health of every plant before him. “And you’ve already grown several inches since we last met,” he complimented another, smiling widely at them. Royce liked plants, he liked their simplicity, their unique vibrancy, how accomplished one felt when they raised them up from seed to beyond.

Watering a few thirsty looking plants with a small canister, he glanced up in time to see another person enter the garden. “Am I crowding your plants?” Royce asked, not sure who’s own were growing near his tomatoes and peppers. “Here, I’ll get out of your way,” he said, using a cloth rag to wipe his dirt-caked hands as he carefully pulled himself up to his full height. That was when he heard it, the faint and unmistakable buzz of the one thing that could scare him more than the Catalyst, hunters or any other powerful threat combined: A bee. Royce dug into his apron pocket, feeling for his EpiPen and curling his fingers around it the second he placed it, the thundering of his heart calming for a second before he turned back to the other with a bright smile. Not a single sign of his momentary panic was evident on the man’s handsome brow, even as he casually glanced around for the buzzing beastie. “So what’s your poison then? Carrots, winter squash, basil?”

#a/n: lets go witches gardeners! LETS GO #c: amrita #amrita feat. royce #amrita feat. royce 001 #a/n: also no need to match length i was on one writing this idk

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kalpasio · 2 years ago

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Working From Home

You Better Eat That While It's Fresh

A shorter Kalpas x reader fic based off the Golden Courtyard mentioned in the summer event. Chapter 2 below the cut!

A week had passed since you started working in your apartment. You expected to get a plate of food at lunch as you always did, but instead there was a lunch box shoved in your face.

“Take it,” Kalpas growled. “You’re always running back to work anyway. Quit taking up space in my cafeteria.” There was plenty of space for all the residents to eat, but most of them were at work or out right now, so there was absolutely no reason you couldn’t eat here. He was right though, after lunch, you usually had a meeting, so you had to book it to your room to make it back in time.

“Thank you Kalpas, that’s very thought—”

“Scram. You better eat that while it’s fresh!”

“Aye, aye captain!” you gave a mock salute and ran before he could start throwing things at you.

When you opened the lunch, it was the same meal everyone else had gotten, but the salad on the side had carrots cut into the shape of flowers, and one of the rice balls was in the shape of a little bear head (with ears and a face!) It was all so cute, you felt bad eating it, but everything tasted amazing. Kalpas was always complaining about you not eating vegetables, if this was his plan to make you eat more, it was working.

At dinner, you thanked Kalpas for the lunch, but he just brushed you off and handed you your food. Despite his lackluster response, the next day he gave you another packed lunch. This one had little rabbit shaped cucumbers, with tomatoes in the shape of stars, and you were living for it.

When you found out your job had picked up a new project, everyone was happy. When you found out the project had to be done on short notice and you were all forced to crunch, everyone was not happy. Kalpas included, apparently.

You missed dinner for a week straight and were really only eating in your room. The coffee maker in your kitchen was nearly as overworked as you were, and as much as you hated to admit it, there was at least a week’s worth of unwashed dishes. Your whole apartment was a mess, papers scattered on every table, post-it’s sprawling along the wall. It was so bad, when you finally had a chance to breathe, you dreaded picking everything up.

So, you went down to get a good nine pm snack. When you got down there, you heard angry muttering, and you were hesitant to go in. Kalpas stood at the counter, kneading dough and didn’t hear you come in over his grumbling.

“Hey, can I just—” you spoke hesitantly and when Kalpas’ head shot up so he could glare at you, you froze. His glare was more intimidating than you had ever seen, and you suddenly thought that maybe cleaning the mess in your room might be better than being here. “Why are you so angry?” you asked. Really a great question in your opinion.

“I’m always angry,” he snorted. He made a fair point.

“I mean, yeah, but you’re about to turn your bread dough into rubber you’re kneading it so hard.”

“Shut up,” he punched the dough, and you heard the counter groan from the force. “Have you eaten,”

“I was just going to grab a snack—”

“Yes or no.”

“Sort of?” you received a glare and corrected yourself. “No…”

“Sit down. I’m making you dinner.”

You weren’t going to argue with him at this point. Sitting down at what was essentially a bar in the kitchen, you watched as Kalpas put the finishing touches on his dough and placed it in the oven. After that, he quickly placed a snack in front of you and started preparing a full meal.

“This is really good!” It was a small snack, just some crackers and cheese, but you could taste the quality. And you were hoping Kalpas might be less mad if you complimented him.

“Of course it is,” he scoffed. “Stop moving around. If my bread doesn’t rise because of you…” he didn’t need to finish the sentence to send a chill up your spine. After you stopped wiggling however, he actually let you talk to him, and the both of you made light conversation while you ate. The smell of fresh bread was perfect and accented by the fettuccini alfredo you had for dinner.

It was late by the time you thanked Kalpas and left the kitchen. Back in your room, you were mildly disappointed that the mess hadn’t disappeared while you were gone, but at this point you were too tired to care.

The next day you got to cleaning and finished a few hours before dinner, just in time to hear excited yelling. Opening your door, you were able to identify Pardo’s voice. She really got excited over everything, but the only thing that could get her this amped up was Kalpas’ baking. Since you didn’t really have anything to do, you decided to go check it out (and maybe snag a sample if you were lucky).

“Oh? What brings you down here?” Elysia asked while giving you her signature smile. It didn’t surprise you at all to see her here, she and Pardo were always the first to know about Kalpas baking.

“You can hear Pardo from a mile away,” you laughed, “I figured I’d come see what’s cooking.”

“Orange glazed cheesecake! Doesn’t it look amazing?” Elysia always knew what was going on, and you were glad she answered. Once he was focused, Kalpas would rarely speak unless it was to snap at someone.

He was sprinkling some sugar on top, and just when you were about to agree with Elysia, he pulled out a blowtorch and all that came out of your mouth was a very concerned ‘um.’ There was definitely a maniacal grin. You couldn’t see it under his mask, but you were positive it was there. Pardo let out a shriek and Elysia just clapped her hands as though it were a show.

When Kalpas turned the blowtorch off, you were able to get a good look at the cheesecake. The sugar had hardened, and the once completely orange glaze now had brown streaks that reminded you of a certain mask. The dessert was distinctive like It’s creator, and you had no doubts the sugar would add a texture that made the piece all the more delicious.

When Kalpas started cutting the cheesecake, you felt your mouth water and the two girls next to you were no better off. Elysia tried to charm her way into the first piece while Pardo was determined to beg until he gave in. The disappointment was clear on their face when he placed the slice in front of you.

He said nothing, but you knew he was waiting for your opinion of the taste, and there was only one correct answer. Nervously, you picked up the fork and took a bite. The flavor was perfectly balanced, not too much sweetness from the cake, and just enough bitterness from the orange. The glaze melted in your mouth rather than being slimy, and even the crust had a pleasant taste, not just something there to hold the cheesecake.

You could feel his gaze as he waited for your assessment, but there really were no words for how good this was. “Kalpas, this is…it’s just…I could die happy having had this. Holy shit. It’s beyond amazing and brilliant, this is perfection.”

“What’d you expect. I don’t make bad food.” He scoffed, but you could hear the grin in his voice. Now that he knew the dessert was up to snuff, he readily gave the other two a slice. They both agreed with your opinion of the cake and ended up finishing it off before you even got another slice.

My weeb is showing with this lunch I am sorry. Also thank you for dealing with me spamming the Kalpas x reader tag I promise I'll slow down for a bit. I have to fucking post on ao3 first not just because I want to link it but if I copy straight from word to tumblr, it brings in weird shit and it's just easier to copy from ao3.

#kalpas x reader #honkai x reader #azaryawrites #tamalethebear #cross posted on ao3 #sorry for spamming these tags

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ohhicas · 3 years ago

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hey I got bored at work and made a KH Cafe ‘Menu’ but entirely Org13 themed some are suppose to be the ‘main’ things while the others are me panicking and like “WELL, SHIT,” throwing ideas out against the wall

all for funsies cause im fully aware these won’t look cute on a plate, but hey. it’s the org. they’re the edgy emo kids.

Xemnas:

Meal: Hayashi rice with pickled ginger on the side and the cream swirl. The rice is dyed yellow and in the molded to the shape of a heart. Complimentary clear red chopsticks come with the meal. Drink: Shaken espresso served in a martini glass. Lightly flavored with vanilla and a cinnamon sugar lip Dessert: Affogato with vanilla ice cream, cinnamon sugar dusting, and shaved chocolate. An acrylic of his weapon (however hard it is to make two laser swords look cool) comes laying against the serving plate.

Xigbar:

Meal: Pumpernickel, cream cheese, and salmon half-sandwich. Side of a spicy cucumber salad and toothpick skewered tomatoes. The acrylic of the arrow gun is attached to a toothpick, which is holding the sandwich closed. Drink: Black peppercorn infused blackberry syrup with club soda. Served not stirred for layering effect. Comes with an acrylic of his arrowgun attached to the stir-stick Dessert: Two slices of roll cake, chocolate outside with an anko cream filling. Plated so they're half laying on each other with a thick chocolate drizzle going across the left side of both cakes. The plate is dotted with whipped cream with a fanned strawberry leaning against it.

Xaldin:

Meal: Chicken omurice with three strips of seaweed across the egg. Comes with three mixed skewered vegetables on a small bed of lettuce. Drink: A delicately layered drink with blackberry puree at the base, a rose jelly and syrup layer, and carefully topped with soymilk. Stirring with the provided berry skewer on a themed Xaldin lance stick will blend the flavors. Dessert: A single slice of a dense chocolate cake with edible, dried rose petals. It’s more of a torte than a true ‘cake’, and has three blackberry glaze drizzle stripes across the slice.

Vexen:

Meal: A small bowl of cold cucumber soup with four cream cheese tea sandwiches. Each tea sandwich has two to three small heart-cut pink radish across the top. Drink: Blue cream soda carefully layered to fade to clear on top. It’s topped with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and some white snowflake shaped sprinkles. Dessert: Two scoops of coconut flavored ice cream dressed up with whipped cream and coconut shavings. The ice cream balls have a stripe of strawberry preserve and a few dots of mango to pose as buttons to theme it like a snowman. An acrylic standee of his Snowman shield is stuck in the whipped cream

Lexaeus:

Meal: Curry plate with chicken katsu cutlet. Instead of laying on a bed of rice, the chicken lays against side vegetables with the rice is shaped into a mound, placed center of the curry. An acrylic image of Lexaeus's skysplitter is placed into the rice, handle sticking up. Drink: Hot orange spice tea. Nothing too special, but there is a slice of orange pressed to the bottom of the shallow cup that can be eaten after, if you’re in to warm fruit. Dessert: A caramel cake baked in a rock shaped mold. It sits on a bed of five banana slices and drizzled with caramel sauce. A few dark brown and orange candy chocolate rocks are also scattered around the base.

Zexion:

Meal: An open face sandwich on toast, layered with lettuce, cheese, and ham. The top of the ham is decorated with the Organization's logo in mayonnaise. Comes with leafy side salad and fruit. Drink: Blueberry fruit syrup layered with club soda and edible pearl powder to give the drink an illusionist shimmer. Topped with just enough cream to reach the top of the glass and a dusting of dried blueberry powder. Dessert: Six small shortbread cookies decorated in icing fondant to look like the cover of his book. Served with dipping chocolate. Comes with an acrylic souvenir of his book.

Saix:

Meal: Hamburg steak plate with a decorative X shape of mayo across the sauced top, served on a small bed of rice. Comes with a side salad of mixed vegetables and crescent moons of baked kabocha squash. An acrylic of the Claymore is pressed into the center of the steak as if it was slammed in. Drink: Lavender syrup mixed with American lemonade only until the drink resembles a light grey color rather than a heavy lean into yellow or purple. Decorated with a lemon slice cut to resemble a moon. Dessert: Dome mousse cake with a deep blue finish. The mousse is lightly lemon flavored with a center of blueberry jam, and resting upon a vanilla cake base. The cake is decorated with a fondant crescent moon and a dusted golden X. Comes with a candied lemon wedge.

Axel:

Meal: A slice of pepperoni pizza, piled high with small cupping pepperoni, and dusted with chili flake. A side of a tossed, leafy salad is provided to help cut through the heat. A chakram acrylic comes attached to the salad, skewering a tomato wedge. Drink: Tomato juice and beet juice layered together to make a light gradient-- heavier on the tomato than the beet. Top is sprinkled with cayenne for a little bit of an added kick. Decorate with a small celery leaf. Dessert: A blood orange flavored cake, square cut and layered into three small tiers with raw edge sides. The top is sugar crusted and crisped in a brulee, with a sun fondant decoration wedged into a few peaks of cream. A twist of candied orange is also placed as decoration

Demyx:

Meal: Small dish of seafood doria with a side of green vegetable to cut through the heavy dish. No broccoli is in the doria itself, and is instead decorating the side leafy salad. An acrylic of his sitar is laid across the salad. Drink: A tall glass with a clear, bubbly ramune flavored soda. Blue soda-candy jelly is at the base. It’s served cream soda style, with a scoop of vanilla ice cream balanced at the top and a long blue straw. Dessert: A raindrop cake with a soft blue-green gradient. The top is dusted with kinako powder. For how simple the dish is, it comes with a side of seasonal fruit and a plastic spork styled at the top to resemble his sitar's handle that you can take home.

Luxord:

Meal: Caprese bites on a bed of lettuce. The cheese and basil base remains the same for each, but the cherry tomato on top varies between a bright red tomato or a dark purple skinned tomato. The salad has a balsamic drizzle and card suits cut vegetables. Drink: An espresso served with a small container of cream and two sugar cubes, chocolate-dotted to be dice. Dessert: Chocolate lava cake with a deep red filling, dusted with powdered sugar. It's served alongside thin cookies decorated into playing cards. It can be turned into a meal set with the drink option.

Marluxia:

Meal: Salad full of mixed greens and colorful radish. Designed to be incredibly colorful, it’s got a few little blooms of edible flowers wedged around the plate. Comes with a few flower shaped breaded chicken ‘nuggets’ along the rim. Drink: Rose syrup infused sparkling lemon soda, decorated with dried rose petals. There’s the smallest bit of strawberry syrup at the bottom of the cup to really make a pink color. A wedge of lemon decorates the rim. Dessert: A thin, crisp almost crepelike shell in a low dish holds mixed berries, mint, and thick soft chunks of pound cake. The whole thing is drizzled with a sweet rose syrup. An acrylic of his scythe hangs out among the cake bits.

Larxene:

Meal: Two skewers of karaage laying on a bed of cabbage with tartar sauce and two wedges of lemon. The other side of the plate has fries with a bit of mustard drizzled across the tips. Drink: Layered cream soda, blue syrup at the bottom that fades into a pale yellow. It's topped with whipped cream and comes with sour popping candy meant to be mixed into the drink to activate the light carbonation. Comes with an acrylic charm of one of her daggers. Dessert: Shaved ice with yuzu and orange drizzle. It’s a stretch to include it under the Larxene umbrella, but the sour notes should bring forth thoughts of lightning and shocks.

Roxas & Xion:

Meal: Roxas and Xion share the same half sandwich, as if it was once part of a whole sandwich and split into two meal plates. They differ in that Xion gets a side leafy salad with radish and carrot, and Roxas gets french fries. [ and then i gave up makin them desserts & drinks, since they have the seasalt milk ‘drink’ at the actual cafe ]

#kingdom hearts #kh chara talk #technically?? wHO knowS

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snail-care · 4 years ago

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Snail Feeding

Hello I'm finally back! I'm gonna run over a few things you can feed your snails, and things to avoid. Let's gooo

SAFE FOODS

Most vegetables, some good ones are carrot, pumpkin, sweet potato, spinach (see calcium section below), broccoli, corn.

Most fruits, some good ones are apple, pear, banana, peach.

Certain herbs. Safe ones include coriander (cilantro), basil, mintand dill.

Mushroom (don't feed wild mushrooms, stick with ones from stores)

Cooked oats

Egg

Wet cat or dog food (LOOK AT THE INGREDIENTS. get organic and avoid high sodium)

Goldfish flakes (again, look at ingredients. some have garlic and salt, do not feed these!)

Small amounts of unseasoned raw meat

Certain outdoor plants. Ribwort and Broadleaf plantain, dandelion (see calcium section below), grass, chickweed, clover, marigold flowers and rose petals are some safe ones. If in doubt or you can't 100% positively identify the plant, just don't feed it to them. Make absolutely sure there are no herbicides or pesticides.

Algae wafers/tabs for aquatic snails. Feed in moderation but can be good as a backup food if you have no produce!!

UNSAFE FOODS

you need to absolutely avoid these!! they can seriously harm or kill your snail.

Anything salty. for obvious reasons. salt draws out the moisture they need to live

Anything sugary. Sugar has a similar effect to salt.

Processed foods. This will essentially avoid the first two things, as processed foods are usually very high in salt and/or sugar. Includes meats like ham, bacon, etc.

Anything with garlic or onion. Both dangerous to snails. This includes other things in the garlic/onion family like chives, leeks, shallots, spring onions etc.

Starchy foods or things made of grains. This includes pasta, rice, bread, and such. Starchy things absorb water and expand inside the stomach and can cause impaction (a blockage in the digestive system), dehydration and death.

Certain vegetables - Celery, leek, rhubarb.

Certain fruits - Citrus (Orange, lemon, lime), Avocado, Chilli peppers (bell pepper or capsicum is fine, just not spicy ones)

Canned foods. Canned foods, even vegetables or fruit, are preserved with high amounts of sugar or salt.

EXTRA NOTES

Just some important things about snail feeding and nutrition!!

Calcium

Snails ALWAYS need a calcium source available. the best option is cuttlebone, you can get this in pet stores, usually in the bird section. Don't collect cuttlebone off the beach, it will be full of salt. If you don't have cuttlebone yet, finely crushed hen eggshells is okay, but I would only use that short term.

You can make a calcium "brick" out of pure calcium powder for reptiles by adding a little water, shaping it then leaving to dry. Make sure there aren't any other additives if you do this.

Don't sprinkle calcium powder, cuttlebone powder or eggshells onto their food. They will eat the calcium as they need it, and giving them too much can cause a condition similar to kidney stones and can be dangerous. Just keep the calcium available 24/7.

Be wary with kale, dandelion leaves and spinach. They are quite nutritious but high in oxalates which can interfere with calcium absorption. Feed only once or twice a month, and in small amounts.

Protein

Snails need protein once or twice per week.

Protein rich foods include:

Beans, spirulina, peas, sunflower, hemp and pumpkin seeds, lentils.

Eggs, raw meat, cat or dog food.

Bloodworms, mealworms or crickets (dried, frozen or freshly killed, live bugs can bite)

Fish food and algae wafers/tabs

MISCELLANEOUS

Some foods are better than others. Things like lettuce and salad leaves as well as cucumber, watermelon and zucchini are mostly just water and don't have many nutrients. Give in small amounts a couple times a month.

On a similar note, snails have been knows to get "addicted" to cucumber and refuse to eat anything else, becoming malnourished and starving. Feed very rarely and with caution, as a treat.

Higher nutrient foods are: Carrot, sweet potato, mushroom and broccoli. Sweet potato and mushroom are the main staples of my snail's diet.

Vegetables will be the main food source for your snail. Fruits are a treat, and protein is supplementary.

#pet snail #land snails #pet snails #snail #pet safety #snails #inverts #invertebrates #odd pets #weird pets #food #pet care #pets #snail care #snail guide

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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 1 year ago

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DADKI DADKI DADKI …. (rattling the bars of my cage)

RIKOOO uve killed me w this one. he’s so !!!! so so so sweet and funny and silly i adore him :(( aaa the way …. he sees you as too good for him ….. </3 aki ur such a catch pls believe me …

but god these were all so so cute and sweet and heartwrenching to read 😭😭 as always !! ur writing and imagery is so so stunning riko … i absolutely ate this up.

aaaand as always i just have to comment on some lines i rly loved bc !! this was just such a treat to read hhhhh I LOVE DADKI T_T

like an ugly patch of weeds in an old, worn garden that's not worth saving, but still has enough life within it to be marred by rot and degradation of soil.

a flower who's bell shaped bunches of milky petals hang from the stalk like a condemned man on a court platform,

goddd i adore these lines … just so cool !!! especially the second one thats gonna live in my mind forever ….. i love love loveeee ur metaphors riko, especially when it’s tied into flower imagery … i will always be weak for it i fear

further than exhausted mornings littered with extinguished cigarette butts and framed with curling smoke, pale sunrises and slow, languid movement that reflect the growing shadows beneath his tired eyes; further than the bitter scent of the black coffee he always makes for himself because the pathetic attempt at at romantic in him insists that your sweet lips are the sugar and cream to his life enough.

SUCH A GORGEOUS PARAGRAPH??? ive said this before but u r so so good at building up a vibe and like . envoking different sensations? like when i read this i feel like i can almost smell the cigarette smoke and taste the coffee and see the sunrise like DO U KNOW … HOW IMPRESSIVE THAT IS …. im so jealous hhh i wanna get better at doing that w my own writing. aki is such a sap also <33 hes such a sweetie !!

and so, when the fever dream that's your wedding day comes around,

:((( again ……. the way he thinks ur too good for him …. the way he feels as if ur life together is almost like a fever dream bc he probably never even once imagined he could have something so Good. aki hayakawa the man that u are …..

he can't help the gentle soft spot he has for your children when he remembers the big, teethy grins with little cinnamon pastry crumbs scattered around their curved lips and round cherry cheeks are a result of your combined efforts;

sob. i just love how ur writing always incorporates food and fruit and sweet things </3 cherry cheeks .. the crumbs on the corners of their lips … hhh such a pleasant mental image

you'll enjoy a sweet, tender kiss in the golden hazy glow of your warm kitchen bubble, full of lively mirth as you carve out silly little smiley faces and stars out of potatoes and bits of cucumber and carrot.

SO TENDER ………….. i love this kinda domestic vibe sm . its what he deserves ;(

denji and power spoil them to no end; the wonder duo indulge the kids through games of tag and roughhousing, treating them to a wide array of candy and sweets that guarantee a doctor's visit the following week.

it only gets worse when they learn how to negotiate; he makes a mental note to blame denji and power, because there's no way in hell your children figured out how to bargain from you or him.

whines of "aww, but uncle denji lets me take the toys outside, dad!" and "buy me that neko charm, or else i'll tell mom you knocked over her plant pot yesterday!" (which, for the record, isn't true. that was 'auntie' power.)

I LOVE. LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS. i love them. they would genuinely be the best uncles ever i take no criticism. its basically like having two extra kids LMAOO hang in there aki 😭😭

def the type of dad to mutter 'no she didn't' or 'they probably deserved it' under his breath when ur daughter's school principal calls u both in to tell u she stuck her chewed melon gum in three different girls' hair that day

yells at ur kids a lot and starts pouting like the grown ass man he is when u scold him for it ("sorry, love. i got used to it. power and denji were a hell of a handful.")

unrolls his cigarettes and makes origami shapes out of them; once ur daughter got her ears pierced he made a pair of crane earrings for her from the paper (clean ofc. i hope)

hopes and prays like an idiot that his kids see him as a cool epic devil hunter awesome sauce dad and not a silly pathetic failwife househusband (that's only for u to think)

I LOVED THE UNSERIOUS HCS SM they were so funny ….. all of them r so so real. some part of me thinks that aki would be the ”did you win?” parent when it comes to his kids getting into fights but i also think he’d raise them not to be violent …

AND YELLING AT HIS KIDS HPSHDJDH okok but riko … i need ur expert opinion …… would aki be the angry math dad. like. the kinda dad who makes u cry trying to help u w math homework 😭😭😭 I WANNA SAY NO BUT LIKE … the idea of that is so funny to me

AND THE CIGARETTE ORIGAMI ……. why is that lowkey attractive . is it just me .

and then finally; so real so true, aki will always be a silly pathetic failwife househusband <33

> under warm kitchen lights and puffy silk sheets dad!aki hayakawa x reader hcs/drabbles

man... i finally finished this. oh my word wc: 3.2k :cry: cw: fem!reader (use of mother terms but no explicit description), brief mention of hospitals, kids omg so scary boy n girl not proofread!!

i always find myself writing waaayyyyyy too much for these 'short' drabbles/hcs/whatever they are. i think this one got even worse than the yoshida one. anyways its ok cus i live laugh love aki

also thank u @twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat for feeding me ideas with canon hayakawa family interactions :3

it's hard for him, to say the least.

while parenting is a new experience for the both of you, it's more than appropriate to say aki's the least bit familiar. putting up with denji and power (begrudgingly, he'll tell you-- although you never believe it) certainly has him battle-ready and prepared, albeit with a slight darkening of the circles under his velvety blue eyes and a minute downward tug on his chapped lips that need yours on them for rejuvenation when he thinks about the tiring journey lying ahead on a path of family that's only been slightly worn. but then you smile, squeezing his calloused hands that are bigger than yours and intertwining your fingers gently, and he forgets there's supposed to be blood between them as he presses a light kiss to your forehead and tells you in that smooth velvety voice that he's ready for whatever pandemonium your rascals will cause as long as you're there with him.

truth be told, there's nothing in this damned world that aki wants-- yearns for than a life of normality with you. he doesn't have a lust for a revenge that festers and infects, anymore; the only thing on his mind when his work gives the luxury of a time of rest is how wonderful it'd be to start a lively little family of your own as you smile at him or card your hands through his damp hair when you share a lukewarm bath surrounded by cold austere tiles in the darkest hours of the morning, having found him covered in a thin veneer of chilling sweat only moments ago, knuckles pale white as he clung to the duvet. more often than not you find a knot between his dark brows; a heavy weight on his shoulders that's perceivable but frustratingly intangible-- like an ugly patch of weeds in an old, worn garden that's not worth saving, but still has enough life within it to be marred by rot and degradation of soil. but when you wrap your arms around his neck and hold him flush to your chest, so close to your heart-- the place where he thinks he deserves to be furthest from-- when your lithe fingers work so gently it's almost painful to soothe the crease on his nose bridge and the tension between his bare shoulders, he's so bold as to dare to just hope for a life further than nights of hollow intimacy that, in vain, attempt to sew and patch up the gaping valley between the wants of his heart and of his mind. further than exhausted mornings littered with extinguished cigarette butts and framed with curling smoke, pale sunrises and slow, languid movement that reflect the growing shadows beneath his tired eyes; further than the bitter scent of the black coffee he always makes for himself because the pathetic attempt at at romantic in him insists that your sweet lips are the sugar and cream to his life enough. but in truth he can-- and thought he'd always be able to taste that overwhelming tang of something equitable to sourness on his tongue when he downs the bland caffeine, like the feeling that crashes and overwhelms him when he realizes that what you have right now? is just an illusion for his poorly-kept facade of something he wishes could be more. something with a shared bed and an extra room painted bright pastel, a bunk bed tucked into the corner and kids' toys scattered all over the place.

(and as much as you tell him otherwise, some small part of him that he's tucked into the darkest recesses of his mind will always, always believe that you deserve someone immensely better than him-- better than a cynical devil hunter with nothing to offer but years of bottled tears, unspoken words that die on his parched tongue, and withered feeling in his heavy limbs that come with the sensation of dragging himself through the pool of molasses that is the routine of life-threatening missions he throws himself into by a hollow ambition. but he's never, and if he's being honest, he doesn't want to have the heart to end things with you. and imagining you, holding hands with someone else, laughing that bubbly bright melody and smiling that cheery grin in any direction but his, makes his heart hurt uncomfortably and his cold blood boil.)

and so, when the fever dream that's your wedding day comes around, he wishes he had met you early enough to be addicted to the taste of your lips instead of the rough, paper end of a cigarette and the numbing thrill that settles in his diluted veins at the hit of nicotine clogging his lungs, before it's disillusioned and the despondent cycle repeats. you don't know the half of what he'd give for that. either way, he believes it a miracle that he even got the chance to see the starstruck look in your gorgeous eyes when he slid that silver band onto your ring finger; that he lived to see the day where the familiar touch of your tender hands coupled with the refreshing bite of cold metal on his skin, treating him like some elegant thing in your garden; a lily of the valley when in reality he's just some weed that should've been rid of. a flower who's bell shaped bunches of milky petals hang from the stalk like a condemned man on a court platform, yet still so bright and graceful you could forget the plant was poisonous. when aki had laid eyes on that pretty ring, tucked into a black box of deep velvet on a shaded patch of street one sunny afternoon, he immediately thought of how nicely the elegantly-cut gem would match your dazzling irises; he takes extensive care to make sure the luster suits as an addition to your appearance instead of a distractor-- after all, when he looks at his then future spouse, he wants to be drawn to your eyes, then the ring tying you two together like a red string on your pinky fingers. that, and the way your gaze will soften as it lands on him, in the way that could only happen when the purest angel from heaven chooses to spot the bastard straight from hell out of the crowd who dared to nose his way into your ethereal presence. it's truly befitting, he thinks; your touch is featherlight even when all he does is weigh you down like a ball and chain locked to your ankle, bound by softly-spoken vows and a promise amongst the white of veils and pretty cream flowers. and aki is a selfish man, so he's only glad he decided to weave your fates together, even if it meant the good and bad mingled to paint a splash of gray on love's canvas.

that's the story of your love on weighted scales that runs through his buzzing mind the night your sweet little kids ask their mama to recount the tale of your plunge into devotion together to them, far different than the telling words which seem to sweeten tenfold as they fall from your lips onto eager ears that soon turn deaf, sleeping soundly in your arms. for all the aloof, coldness and silence he's ever turned out into the harsh world your family lives and breathes in, aki's surprisingly loving as a father-- he can't help the gentle soft spot he has for your children when he remembers the big, teethy grins with little cinnamon pastry crumbs scattered around their curved lips and round cherry cheeks are a result of your combined efforts; the streak of tenderness you unearthed in him finds itself being yanked wide open by two pairs of small, grubby hands that are tiny enough to wrap around the length of his thumb, like a little pair of gloves that sponge the inpurity from his hands and make his eyes soften, crinkle around the edges in the way that you love. it's certainly not an unfamiliar feeling; the one invoked deep within his hardened chest buds and unfurls within his organs when your kids take their first breath of fresh air-- well, as fresh as clinical hospital air and stark white lights can get-- is the same one that hit him like a truck when his gaze inevitably finds its way back to you every moment you're near him. cupid's arrow has long burrowed into the cavity of his chest, and if he's honest, he doesn't mind at all. if you had the energy to, you would've snuck a quick picture, if not mental, and made a little sweet teasing fun of him for being so dumb-- no, starstruck; a fool absolutely enamored with two little reflections of you and him. the product of literal years in blood, sweat and tears; maybe some coffee, and definitely some love.

and while aki may involuntarily be an intrinsic liar to his very core by nature (you still love him either way, even when he tells you he tried to stop your baby boy from crawling onto the kitchen counter over the sink and clambering onto two shaky toddler legs to paw at the jar of peanut butter in your cabinet), you're not. so you'll enjoy the strawberry blush that seeps its way across the soft skin of his cheeks that you've mapped with fluttering kisses and trembling hands when you tell him just how much of a great father you think he is to your kids, on the nights when he gets home with sufficient energy to whip something up for the haven of cozy warmth he calls 'home'. you'll prep a warm stew together that makes your daughter's mouth water and eyes go round as saucers as she clings to aki koala-bear style, legs wrapped around his neck and fingers curling into his raven hair as she watches him stir the broth with one hand (the other resting firmly, yet gently on her ankle) to melt the icicles clinging to the awnings of your windows for frigid winters. or, maybe some cold soba for those humid summer nights to enjoy amongst the symphony of cicada buzzes and city sounds, watching lights flash by as you laugh and reach out to wipe the soup off of your son's cheeks when the noodle he was indulging on goes up a little too fast, missing the way your husband's eyes fall on you ever so affectionately. you'll enjoy a sweet, tender kiss in the golden hazy glow of your warm kitchen bubble, full of lively mirth as you carve out silly little smiley faces and stars out of potatoes and bits of cucumber and carrot. on the rare occasion you decide it's a good idea to let your kids contribute a little, the immediate and guilty regret you feel when you watch your daughter slip up and knick her little finger gets washed away by a familiar, blooming feeling of adoration, almost sickeningly sweet in its intensity as you pause to watch aki kiss away the beads of ruby red blood welling on the cut, rubbing her 'boo-boo' so tenderly it makes your heart hurt as you gently plaster a cute sunflower bandaid over the cut while your baby girl stares at your husband with such wonder you think he might be a knight-in-shining-armor in her wide round eyes. and it makes his bleeding heart skip a beat when you tell him you see him the same way, too. there's always guaranteed to be a fresh plate of intricate bunny-shaped apple slices as dessert after dinner, and on slow nights spent in the company of family, there'll be a quick and intense battle of rock paper scissor or sticks between the love of your life and your beloved children on who'll be the lucky winner to put their head in your lap tonight.

(although, aki rarely lets himself win, because he knows he'll be able to later that night if not in that fond moment, sure to become a treasured memory.)

aki sees himself as a good father; he's strict when he needs to be, and he always tries to make time for his kids. he's even stopped smoking in front of them; in the house, as a whole. he had to pepper you with a few sweet, slow and intentional kisses and light-hearted apologetic words when you demanded to know why your requests for him to stop slowly killing himself with each drag fell to deaf ears, but suddenly you got a little more intimate and out popped a few kids-- and he'd stopped. of course, those were enough to pacify you; he made your resolve weak, like the sweet wobbly jello you indulged your daughter to as you watched your husband work out a crossword puzzle with your son. sometimes, you have to remind him sternly not to curse in front of his kids. but when he reminds you of the vehement stream of swears that always left you when you had to change less-than-pleasant diapers in your earlier parenting years, he’ll chuckle at the flush on your face, because you seem to elicit a lot of those from him. he’ll smile, because he’s finally found something worth the effort. and he'll run a hand through your hair and press a kiss to your forehead because you've made him capable of caring (and he knows how to distract you). sometimes, though, he thinks he's a little too soft on their pleading looks and puppy eyes on the nights when lightning streaks across the sky in frightening arcs, claps of thunder rumbling across the dark clouds when the streets of tokyo are enveloped in curtains of rain showers, when one (or both) of your beloved kids peeks their head from the doorway, a little 'can i sleep with you guys?' escaping as a timid peep. he watches in a sleepy sort of amusement as you nod, one hand lazily curling around your waist to keep you close to his side as he rests his chin on your shoulder. and it's your turn to stifle your amusement when a small, quiet mumble of protest leaves his mouth as your kid sidles into the covers between the two of you, effectively splitting you from your husband. if he was impatient, you know he'd have half the mind to pick them up and plop them at the edge of the bed to have you all to himself, but on most nights he'll just observe in quiet affection when you scoop up your son or daughter in your arms, cradling them to your chest and playing with that head of soft hair, humming gently in a way that makes his heart melt at the edges

sometimes, when 'uncle' denji and 'auntie' power are over, they'll poke fun at him in their usual, disrespectful and chaotic manner, because it doesn't take a pair of keen eyes to see the way he looks at you like you've hung the very constellations in the sky; like the stellar designs in the firmament were all carefully crafted by your hand. he's no overdone zodiac freak, but he dares to say the stars aligned the night he was finally able to call you his and only his. denji and power get along incredibly well with his kids; it almost makes him jealous. like you, his resolve is incredibly easy to weaken with the right expression and the right words; your kids must've picked up a few tricks from your book, because they know exactly how to play him into the palm of their tiny little hands. denji and power spoil them to no end; the wonder duo indulge the kids through games of tag and roughhousing, treating them to a wide array of candy and sweets that guarantee a doctor's visit the following week. he swears the pinch between his eyes you worked so hard to eliminate returns little by little when he watches them run around the place he used to call his safe haven, leaving a trail of absolute destruction and havoc in the form of torn magazines, splintered puzzle pieces, apple sauce sludge, tiny lego blocks (that leave a lifetime of pain), and pairs of his socks. it only gets worse when they learn how to negotiate; he makes a mental note to blame denji and power, because there's no way in hell your children figured out how to bargain from you or him. whines of "aww, but uncle denji lets me take the toys outside, dad!" and "buy me that neko charm, or else i'll tell mom you knocked over her plant pot yesterday!" (which, for the record, isn't true. that was 'auntie' power.) that being said, it's a given family outings are narrowly avoided disasters; as the kids grow, aki swears he'll have to start keeping them on a leash, or they might end up accidentally shoplifting your local 7/11's supply of sour gummy cubes, or have fed daffodil seeds to each stray cat on your condo's street under one blink of a weary eye. at the end of the day, he always caves with an exasperated sigh and an irritated 'fine. but don't tell your mom, okay?'. after all, he's always been a sucker for you; who's to say he's not the same with your kids?

unserious hcs... :3

unreasonably competitive w his children. god knows why

yells at ur kids a lot and starts pouting like the grown ass man he is when u scold him for it ("sorry, love. i got used to it. power and denji were a hell of a handful.")

tucks them both in n denies it with everything in him when u ask if he likes making them beg for goodnight smooches

tells them to fuck off (in childrenspeak) when its ur marriage anni / date night

when they were rlly young, u guys used to all do family showers and or baths together but then water would get everywhere and the rubber duck would be fought over n bathbombs would overflow and the kids would get mad at each other so u dont do that anymore...

an absolute goof and doesnt know what the hell hes doing at first... one time ur son was choking on a cherry pit and he didnt know what to do so he just. shook him. by some miracle it worked (if it was denji or power he wouldve js smacked their back unnecessarily aggressively)

unrolls his cigarettes and makes origami shapes out of them; once ur daughter got her ears pierced he made a pair of crane earrings for her from the paper (clean ofc. i hope)

thoroughly enjoys forcing himself into mother daughter nights and he grumbles but secretly loves when ur daughter practices makeup on him or braids his hair

hopes and prays like an idiot that his kids see him as a cool epic devil hunter awesome sauce dad and not a silly pathetic failwife househusband (that's only for u to think)

stitches up any clothing, pillow cases or stuffed animals that r falling apart, also makes sure that no color bleeds when washing clothes and that nothing shrinks cus he does all the laundry for evryone

helps u make a family photo scrapbook and tape polaroids to ur fridge. lets the kids cut out patterns and shapes (his fav r the nutrition facts for some weird reason) from their juiceboxes and kids' magazines to put in the scrapbook

whenvr ur napping he always tells them to shut up. or he just forces them to nap too so he can be lazy and crawl into bed w u

a very good dad !!

hes such a loser oh no.. i should've just used the unserious hcs for the entire thing. i rambled im sorry it will happen again. i love himr

my (riaki) stuff. don't repost and/or plagiarize !

#I LOVED THIS RIKOOOOO #thank u for ur service to aki nation mwah mwah 💋💋#this was just so so sweet :(( a perfect morning read !!

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muchi13kitty · 3 months ago

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Gift for @eskariolis-con-salsa she is Fake Meadow, her real name is "Eddie" she was a test experiment called "D-234" she suffered a lot Fake Meadow mistreated beaten tortured even se*****y abused her pink eye can not move because if she moves it her eye will explode with blood she has to wait 5 weeks for her eye to return to normal but Fake Meadow loves everyone no matter if you are a human or not if you are good or a villain a clone like Fake Peppino or Fake Noise it doesn't matter Fake Meadow loves you but Fake Meadow hates people like pizzahead to death

Fake Meadow She loves flowers very much fake Meadow smells like flowers her braids smell like honey Fake Meadow she has can run between 300 and 1,000 m/s like a bullet in the air. You can tame her with heart lollipops, heart gummies, or heart cookies. fake Meadow eats apples, carrots, cucumbers, bones, whether human, animal, or creature, frogs, candies, Taro, waffles, cookies, meat, pizza, tortillas, tacos, chips, nopales, chops, beef head, hearts, pears, chicken, pozole, bread, etc. Fake Meadow's blood is pink with glitter and tastes very delicious and sweet like a filling in a gum Another thing about Fake Meadow She is very intelligent, her brain is very gigantic and her skull is very impossible to break, something like the pachycephalosaurus fake Meadow plays 4 musical instruments: the saxophone, the trumpet, the violin and the piano Fake Meadow doesn't speak backwards like Fake Peppino Fake Meadow speaks normally she has the voice of Unikitty Alison Brie. Well Fake Meadow speaks 2 languages English and Mexican Spanish Fake Meadow's voice in Mexican Spanish is done by "Cristina Hernandez" the voice of "Osito Bimbo"

Fake Meadow belongs to the "Flower Clan" [represents kindness, harmony, friendship, intelligence and being faithful fun and teamwork] Fake Meadow has elements that is a flower-shaped kunzite Fake Meadow doesn't know what love is? but well fake Meadow loves Meadow canssidy Fake Meadow takes care of her friends and Meadow canssidy (Fake Meadow is a faithful friend with a puppy)

fake Meadow has many wounds from experiments, blows, electricity, burns and se*** abuse all over her body, which is why she never takes off her long white gloves (they are to hide her arms and hands that look like they belong to a zombie but she is not a zombie) Fake Meadow's eyes at night can be used with a candle lamp [it can even kill vampires, ghosts or evil spirits] there are times that Fake Meadow can electrocute fake Meadow is sweet and tastes very sweet but don't eat it because it can give you diabetes from eating too much sugar [Fake Meadow is made of a lot of powdered sugar a lot of gum a little of Meadow's hair glitter human blood human eyes a drop of seal blood baby Weddell axolotl veins and a Jack Russell terrier puppy and an Abyssinian kitten]

Fake Meadow is very huggable by the way I didn't draw this, "Cute or scary?" did it, it's a YouTube channel

Fake Meadow be like:

#Fake Meadow #star super adventures 2017

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greenheartart · 4 years ago

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Monster Food Theories (part 2)

(A multi-part essay because I love world-building.)

In part 1 I discussed the theory that monster food is actually made from physical food that’s been infused with magic, and therefore monster food is limited to what can be farmed in the Underground.

In this next part, I’m going to springboard off that idea and talk about what foods exist in the Underground (and therefore what crops and livestock monsters likely have.)

The very first thing I want to look at is what food canonically exists in the game. I’m going to break this up into two sections...

1) Food We Interact With Directly (Healing items we can pick up and get information on.)

* Monster Candy - Has a distinct, non-licorice flavor. Heals 10 HP. * Spider Donut - A donut made with Spider Cider in the batter. Heals 12 HP. * Spider Cider - Made with whole spiders, not just the juice. Heals 24 HP. * Butterscotch Pie - Butterscotch-cinnamon pie, one slice. Heals ALL HP. * Snail Pie - Heals some HP. An acquired taste. Heals one less than max HP. * Nice Cream - Instead of a joke, the wrapper says something nice. Heals 15 HP. * Bisicle - It’s a two-pronged popsicle, so you can eat it twice. Heals 11 HP. * Unicicle - It’s a SINGLE-pronged popsicle. Wait that’s just normal... Heals 11 HP. * Cinnamon Bunny - A cinnamon roll in the shape of a bunny. Heals 22 HP. * Astronaut Food - For feeding a pet astronaut. Heals 21 HP. * Crab Apple - An aquatic fruit that resembles a crustacean. Heals 18 HP. * Sea Tea - Made from glowing marsh water. Increases SPEED for one battle. Heals 10 HP. * Abandoned Quiche - A psychologically damaged spinach egg pie. Heals 34 HP. * Temmie Flakes - It’s just torn up pieces of construction paper. Heals 2 HP. * Dog Salad - Recovers HP (Hit Poodles.) Heals 2/10/30/ALL HP. * Instant Noodles - Comes with everything you need for a quick meal! Heals 4/15/90 HP. * Hot Dog...? - The “meat” is made out of something called a “water sausage.” Heals 20 HP. * Hot Cat - Like a hot dog, but with little cat ears on the end. Heals 21 HP. * Junk Food - Food that was probably once thrown away. Heals 17 HP. * Starfait - A sweet treat made of sparkling stars. Heals 14 HP. * Glamburger - A hamburger made of edible glitter and sequins. Heals 27 HP. * Legendary Hero - Sandwich shaped like a sword. Increases ATTACK when eaten. Heals 40 HP. * Steak in the Shape of Mettaton’s Face - Huge steak in the shape of Mettaton’s face. You don’t feel like it’s made of real meat... Heals 60 HP. * Popato Chisps - Regular old popato chisps. Heals 13 HP. (Note: I’ve chosen to leave the Hush Puppy off of this list, as its description refers to it as a spell. I’m also excluding the foods that can only be found by digging around in the game files - Puppydough Ice Cream, Pumpkin Rings, Rock Candy, Croquet Roll, Ghost Fruit, and Stoic Onion.)

2) Food We Only See, or Hear About Through Character Dialogue (I did my best to be thorough here, but please let me know if I missed any and I’ll add them in!)

* Hamburger (For sale at Grillby’s) * Fries (For sale at Grillby’s) * Cheese Fries (Undyne likes them, for sale at Grillby’s) * Ketchup (Found at Grillby’s / Sans’ Hot Dog Stand) * Mustard (Found at Sans’ Hot Dog Stand) * Relish (Found at Sans’s Hot Dog Stand) * Spaghetti (Made by Papyrus and Undyne) * Lasagna/Ravioli/various other pastas (Mentioned by Papyrus) * Brewskis (aka Beer) (Mentioned in a prank call) * Sugar (In Undyne’s kitchen) * Soda (In Undyne’s kitchen / Alphys’ Lab) * Hot Chocolate (Mentioned by Undyne) * Marshmallows (Mentioned by Undyne) * Golden Flower Tea (In Undyne’s kitchen / Offered by Asgore) * Grapes (Undyne talks about Mettaton eating them) * Pizza (Undyne and Alphys both talk about ordering some) * Limes (Undyne mentions eating them whole) * Cucumbers (Come up when Undyne and Papyrus talk about spa treatments) * Carrots (Mentioned by Asgore on the tapes in the true lab) * Lollipops (Papyrus mentions getting them from the lady who runs the inn) * Ice cream (Mentioned multiple times by multiple characters) * Espresso (Mentioned by Red Bird at Grillby’s) * Cake (Mettaton specifically breaks the ingredients down into SUGAR, MILK, EGGS during his cooking segment) * Artificial Ingredients and Chemicals (Also mentioned by Mettaton)

(Note: I’m leaving edamame off the list because while Toriel mentions it, she does it as a joke because she’s after the pun. It’s possible that monsters have edamame, or it could just be something she’s aware exists in the world in general.)

So! Looking at this list, and cross referencing with recipes to find the most basic necessary ingredients to make everything, I can break things down more neatly into categories of available food:

STARCHES * Wheat * Potatoes * Barley

FRUITS AND VEGETABLES * Apples * Grapes * Limes * Tomatoes * Cucumbers * Spinach PROTEIN AND DAIRY * Snails * Water sausages * Eggs * Milk

HERBS AND SPICES * Cinnamon * Mustard Seed

MISC * Salt * Sugar * Oil * Coffee * Chocolate * Assorted artificial ingredients and chemicals * Golden flowers (unique to the Underground?) * Hops (only because of the mention of “brewskis”)

(Note: I’m excluding a few healing items from contributing to this list. The Astronaut Food’s origin is nebulous - it sounds like it could possibly be human food that fell from the surface and landed in the dump. Temmie Flakes are construction paper and not actually food, even if they are technically consumable. Dog Salad is clearly an outlier and should not be counted.)

When broken down to its base components, it’s a pretty small list. Monsters don’t seem to have a lot to work with.

A lot of their foods revolve around the same few staple ingredients: Flour, eggs, sugar, and milk products. From that we can take a guess that there are wheat fields somewhere in the Underground. Likewise, they likely keep chickens as well for eggs (though other birds like ducks might be a possibility too.) Sugar and milk have more options. Sugar might come from sugar cane or sugar beets, while milk could come from a variety of animals, but I think goats or sheep are more likely than cows for a variety of reasons (mainly that cows might be too much of a resource drain to support long term.)

Interestingly, we never get any indication that monsters eat animals besides snails. The information we get on the hot dogs and steak make it clear that they’re not made out of meat (and if the steaks aren’t meat, it feels reasonable that the hamburgers aren’t either.) This makes sense, since the Underground has limited space and resources and might not be able to support farms dedicated to raising animals for meat, and/or might not be able to meet the demands of a populace that wants to eat meat regularly. If it’s eaten at all, meat might be a rare treat. Otherwise, it looks like the monster population could be largely vegetarian.

With a basic list of crops, we can also make a guess at what sort of alcohols might be available in Grillby’s bar. Monsters have apples, grapes, potatoes, and sugar, so we can guess that in addition to beer (since it gets mentioned specifically), monsters could also have hard cider, wine, brandy, whisky, rum, vodka, and moonshine.

If we want to be a bit more generous and include possible foods and foods that didn’t quite make it officially into the game, we can add back in edamame, pumpkins, and onions.

And, just for fun and going off of nothing except the environment of the game, it wouldn’t be unreasonable to think monsters might be able to round out their pantries with a few other foods that occur naturally in the caverns. Mushrooms show up in the damper areas of the game, so it’s not far fetched to think that there might be a few edible varieties available. Likewise, we see streams and marshes in Waterfall that support life. It’s possible that there are fish, crayfish, or shellfish living in there, or possibly other edible plants besides the water sausage.

This went a bit longer than I originally planned, so in the next part I’ll talk about what might make monster food inherently different from human food (even without monsters intentionally doing anything to it), and possibly theories about how and why monsters ended up with this specific, limited variety of foods they seem to be working off of.

#writing things #game theory #undertale #all of this because I got to wondering whether or not monsters would know about tequila or not in a story I'm writing #hahaha

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