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redvexillum · 25 days ago

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Dedicated to my fluff-loving friend, Ms. 🍑. I'm getting whiplash. The last four days were probably the darkest and smuttiest writing I've done - and today, it's ...fluff to the max. I stuffed all the fluff in my mouth. I want this story to be so fluffy that I become fluffy.

A smile was said to be worth a thousand words, a silent language that could light up the room, soothe others, or even hide the darkest of truths.

But what did it mean if you couldn’t smile? If every time you tried, your lips refused to cooperate, did that make you worthless?

All your life, people said the same thing: “Just smile, honey.” And when you didn’t, they assumed you were upset, angry, or just a frigid bitch.

But that wasn’t it. It was never that simple. You weren't upset, at least not in the way they thought.

So, you started practising, standing in front of the mirror day by day, willing yourself to smile. You’d stretch your lips upwards, trying to mould them into something that looked natural. But the face that stared back at you was wrong.

It didn’t look like you.

The curve of your lips felt forced, your eyes not lighting up the way they were supposed to. The reflection almost mocked you with its emptiness, the smile looking more like a grimace, a mask of something false.

And you hated it.

You hated how fake it felt, how alien it looked. It didn’t bring you any joy, just a hollow, bitter taste.

If a smile was truly worth a thousand words, then maybe yours was worth nothing at all.

Alastor had spent months trying to coax a smile out of you. When you first arrived at the hotel, your lips were a perfect, unyielding line, your eyes flat and devoid of any spark. At first, he paid you no mind. The hotel was bustling, full of fresh souls seeking redemption, and he had no shortage of entertainment.

The “Princess’ Redemption Program,” as much as it irked him, was thriving. There were countless other residents, and yet...you stood out, your lack of expression gnawing at him more than he’d care to admit.

He didn’t like you – not at first. While others laughed and grinned, you remained stone-faced, and it irritated him. You befriended everyone in the hotel, navigating its chaos with grace, but never once did your lips so much as twitch into a smile. And that irked him more.

Eventually, something in him shifted. Perhaps it was the challenge you presented, or maybe he had eternity to burn. Either way, he decided he was going to make you smile. Once, just once, and then he’d be on his merry way.

So, he tried everything. At first, you merely raised an eyebrow, curious but silent as he suddenly began spending more time with you. Yet, you never complained. Instead, you listened, offering no reaction other than attentive silence.

He’d tell jokes, ones that normally left him in stitches, but you’d sit there, unblinking, lips still pressed into that same stubborn line.

Then, he tried pranks. He’d tap your shoulder and watch you startle when he appeared behind you, his laughter echoing down the halls. Every time, the same trick, the same reaction – but never a smile. Only a flicker of surprise before you carried on, as if nothing had happened.

“Knock, knock!” He said one day, his voice lifting to its usual jovial pitch, eyes gleaming with mischief.

You tilted your head, blinking innocently at him. “Who’s there?”

“Boo,” he said, leaning closer, the tension in the air thickening with his creeping grin.

“Boo, who?”

His neck tilted, cracking unnaturally to the side as his microphone staff crackled with a sharp burst of static. “Oh, don’t cry now, dear! You’ll really have something to weep about once the fun begins!” His smile stretched wide, cutting into his cheeks as the ominous word settled into the space between you.

But you stared back, unfazed. “That joke is pretty on-brand with you,” you said in the same soft monotone, nodding slightly before continuing on your way as if nothing had happened.

Alastor’s left eye twitched as he watched you walk away, completely unfazed. He had told you674 jokes. Six hundred and seventy-four. And not once had you cracked a smile. It couldn’t be that his jokes weren’t funny – that would be an outrageous, preposterous impossibility!

No, it had to be you.

No matter how many jokes fell flat, Alastor wasn’t deterred. When punchlines didn’t work, he decided to escalate – physical humour.

One afternoon, while you were quietly reading in the hotel library, he summoned a shadow tendril with the flick of his hand. It slithered across the floor silently until it reached your side, then gently wiggled under your arm.

A soft, startled yelp escaped you, a sound so unexpectedly cute that it nearly startled him. You looked down at the mischievous tendril, now waving back at you in playfulness. Your cheeks flushed, embarrassment creeping up your neck as your eyes flicked toward Alastor, trying to understand what just happened.

And Alastor? He blinked, for the first time in what felt like an eternity, he realized something new about himself. There was something oddly...endearing about the sound you made. It reminded him of a small, startled puppy, and he couldn’t help but want to hear it again.

But why?

Why did he suddenly crave that pathetic little noise? He almost wanted to scold himself for it, but the curiosity was far stronger.

A booming laugh erupted from him instead, loud and dramatic as always, masking the strange and unfamiliar sensation bubbling in his chest. His heart – what was left of it – beat harder, faster. Palpitations? After death? How bizarre.

Over time, however, things changed in subtle ways. He noticed how easily you fit into his life, sliding into his routine with an almost unnerving grace. Somehow, without ever asking, you convinced him to join you for breakfast each morning. While you quietly nibbled on toast with jam or a simple egg, Alastor would indulge in more ...exotic fare – perhaps a raw deer carcass or the seared flesh of a particularly deserving sinner. Yet, your expression never wavered. No grimace. No disgust.

There was something oddly comforting about your presence at the breakfast table, the quiet companionship as the two of you sat together. Alastor hadn’t realized how much he missed that – true companionship – since arriving in Hell. Surrounded by chaos and destruction, he hadn’t noticed the absence of something so simple, so human.

He didn’t mind the morning with you. In fact, he began to look forward to them.

Days blurred into weeks, and then months. Despite the time you spent together, Alastor had still never seen you smile. Occasionally, he thought he caught the faintest hint of something – a softening in your eyes, perhaps, when you glanced his way – but it never quite reached your lips. At this point, he figured he was smiling enough for both of you.

Then, something strange happened. He stopped obsessing over making you smile. Somewhere along the line, it ceased being a game or a challenge. He just...stopped. And as for what he was doing with you now? He wasn’t entirely sure.

He found himself becoming more involved in your daily life, his presence intertwining with your routine. He shared more meals with you. He strolled beside you through town, spinning tales of his past, both in life and in Hell, as you listened with quiet, patient attention.

And now, here he was, sitting next to you in the library, the two of you reading in comfortable silence, side by side.

Your arms barely touched, but when you turned a page and the lightest brush of your arm grazed his, Alastor found himself leaning ever so slightly toward you. The movement was so subtle, so imperceptible, that even he wasn’t sure why he did it.

But he didn’t pull away.

“ROOOWRRR!” A ghastly yowl echoed through the halls, followed by a chorus of scream – most notably, Charlie’s. Her frantic voice rang out, sharp and panicked.

“ALASTOR!” Charlie’s scream tore down the hall, urgent and distressed.

You jolted in place as you instinctively turned to Alastor. Confusion and a flicker of fear danced across your face. Without thinking, Alastor’s hand reached out, patting your arm in what should have been a casual gesture.

Yet, it felt different – this was the first time he’d touched you in an attempt to comfort. His eyes flickered down to where his hand rested against your skin, realizing the weight of the act. Suddenly, he pulled back as if he had been burned, his fingers tingling from the contact.

Clearing his throat, he straightened up, trying to cover his uncharacteristic slip with a wide, winning smile. “Ah, it’s nothing to worry your silly head about, darling! Just...that thing again. Visits every three years, though it’s a bit early this time,” he said, his tone light as he brushed imaginary lint off his sleeves, his movements slow and deliberate.

“That...thing?” You tilted your head, your wide eyes full of innocent curiosity and a touch of lingering uncertainty. Your shoulders hunched in slightly, unconsciously trying to make yourself smaller, to shrink away from whatever chaos awaited in the lobby.

Alastor’s gaze softened, and an unfamiliar urge tugged at him. He wanted to rub your back in reassurance, to ease the tension in your frame. He had hugged Rosie, hugged Mimzy – so surely, hugging you wouldn’t be any different.

Yet as his eyes traced the delicate line of your figure, he froze. His heart thudded in his chest, the heat crawling up from his core to his cheeks, unbidden and unfamiliar. The feeling, strange and sudden, made his left eye twitch.Heartburn? Now, of all times?

“It’s nothing, darling,” Alastor assured, folding his hands neatly behind his back, masking the odd sensation that threatened to rise. “You might as well come and see for yourself – it's quite the hideous little thing,” he added with a smirk, trying to inject a bit of humour.

Curiosity lit up your face, your lips parting in a soft gasp, eyes gleaming. “A hideous little thing?” you asked, your voice gentle as you picked up your pace to walk beside him.

He couldn’t help but notice that each of his strides required you to take two steps to keep up. Without much of a thought, he slowed his pace until you matched him easily. “Yes, hideous and annoying. I’ve repeatedly told everyone not to feed it, yet here we are,” he muttered, his eyes narrowing in mild distaste as you approached the source of the chaos.

When you reached the lobby, your eyes widened in pure awe. There, bouncing off the walls with a guttural yowl, was a red-furred four-legged creature the size of a cat. Its eyes were comically pointed outward, each one staring in opposite directions, and the tufts of black tipped fur on its ears bore an uncanny resemblance to Alastor’s own. To top it off, the creature sported a monocle on its left eye – just like Alastor’s.

“Alastor!” Vaggie’s voice cut through the air as she stood in the centre of the room, sweating and pointing an accusatory finger at the beast. “Deal with Catastor!”

Your eyes darted to Alastor. “Catastor?” you repeated, the name settling on your lips as you tried to suppress the amusement creeping into your voice.

Alastor sighed, his grin never faltering. “Yes, Catastor. Don’t ask,” he muttered, casting the creature a look of pure disdain. He turned his attention to Vaggie, his grin tightening as his eyes narrowed. “I’ve told you many times, that thing looks nothing like me,” he spat, thrusting the head of his staff toward the red-furred creature now lazily stretching its body and wiggling around the room, seemingly oblivious to the chaos it had caused.

“Really?” you mused, stepping forward, your eyes sparkling with mischief. “It does look a bit like you,” you teased, inching closer to the bizarre creature.

Alastor’s gaze darted to you, and his voice lowered, an edge of warning in his tone. “Careful, darling. That thing has a taste for sinners,” he muttered, grimacing. “Considering, it always manages to sneak into my stockpile of them.”

The beast, as if sensing the conversation was about it, suddenly lunged in your direction. Alastor’s eyes widened in horror. His heart leapt into his throat as he instinctively reached out, but before he could summon even a flicker of his power to protect you, you had already acted.

With surprising grace, your hands slid under the creature’s armpits, effortlessly catching it mid-lunge. You cradled it as though it were nothing more than a stray kitten. “Hello again,” you cooed softly, your voice calm, eyes brightening with a gentle warmth as you tilted your head in amusement.

The room was a mess – the lights still swayed from the beast’s earlier rampage, and a bit of the floorboard lay shattered and torn across the space. Everyone’s hair was in disarray, save for Alastor and you.

Offering an apologetic smile, you looked around. “I’m sorry,” you said softly, glancing at the others. “I didn’t know we weren’t supposed to feed him.”

Alastor blinked, too stunned to respond. You held the creature against your chest, your fingers tenderly petting its head, and to his utter disbelief, the beast – this monstrous, chaotic thing – melted in your hands. Its lower half sagged like goo, limp and boneless, as you held it up by its torso.

A burst of laughter slipped from your lips, light and full of joy. “Silly boy,” you murmured, playfully bopping the creature’s nose. Then, you looked up at Alastor, your eyes curved in a gentle, delighted line, and your smile – radiant and bright – struck him like a punch to the gut. “I promise I’ll take care of him properly, so he doesn’t cause any more trouble. Could he stay?”

“Absolutely-” Alastor began, his voice rising in protest, but the words caught in his throat. His gaze was glued to your lips, curved in that dazzling smile. He hadn’t even noticed the creature snuggling closer to your chest, its purrs filling the air like a mocking reminder of its victory. That hideous, absurd thing had succeeded where he had failed for months.

Before he could fully voice his objection, Angel Dust’s voice broke through the moment. “Wait - you’ve been feeding it?” Angel coughed, climbing out from beneath the rubble, dusting himself off. “And that thing didn’t try to eat you?”

Vaggie, eyes narrowed, stomped her foot in frustration. “How do you know it tries to eat people, Angel? Did you feed it too?”

Angel shrugged, glancing at her sheepishly. “Maybe...”

Alastor’s eye twitched, irritation surging through him. Months – months of trying to get you to smile, and now, here you were, beaming because of that disgusting creature. He clenched his jaw, attempting to suppress the growing wave of annoyance.

Vaggie shot a glare toward Charlie, groaning in exasperation. “No...don’t tell me. Have all of you been feeding Catastor after Alastor explicitly told us not to?”

Alastor gritted his teeth, the growing resentment gnawing at him. The fact that the creature’s name had been twisted to mimic his own was an insult he could barely stand. He opened his mouth, ready to snap with a biting retort, but before he could, you stepped in front of him.

The beast had fully stretched, wrapping its long, serpentine torso around your neck like a scarf, purring contentedly as it nuzzled into you. Alastor’s eyes flickered between the creature and your smiling face, and for a brief moment, the world seemed to shift.

That smile – your smile – he'd been chasing it for so long. And now that it was here, he wasn’t sure what to do with the flutter of emotions tangled up inside him.

“Alastor, if he causes any trouble, I’ll-” you faltered, eyes scanning the floor, searching for words before meeting his gaze. “I’ll deal with the consequences. So, c-could you give him a chance? I promise I’ll take good care of him, we-we'll stay out of trouble!” Your voice wavered, eyes pleading, as your once hopeful smile slowly began to shrink.

Alastor’s eyes flicked to the red-furred beast lounging lazily around your neck. The creature had been nothing but a nuisance, sneaking into his stock of food and leaving foul messes all over his bayou. The obvious answer was no. It was so clear in his mind – he could already see himself punting the cat-like creature far across the pentagram, dusting his hands of the whole ordeal.

But as your smile withered, and your eyes searched his, slowly realizing the inevitable refusal, something tugged at his chest. That sinking look in your eyes...it ate away at him.

The obvious answer was no.

But instead...

“I swear,” he began, his tone sharp, deliberate. “If that thing causes any hint of trouble in my room, particularly, I’m going to eat that cat.” He enunciated each word, his grin widening as he flashed his sharp teeth, shooting a glare at the foul creature. In response, the creature mockingly stuck its tongue out at him, which only further soured his mood.

What surprised him was how your face lit up – how your eyes widened, shimmering with joy, and how your once solemn expression now blossomed into something so bright it seemed to light up the entire room. You grabbed his hands in your excitement, shaking them up and down with a bubbling laughter that filled the air like music.

“Oh, thank you, thank you!” you exclaimed, laughter spilling from your lips like sunshine.

Alastor stood frozen, utterly stunned. He stared at you, his grinning mask forced on as he took in the sight of your laughter, the warmth of your smile. It was as if something inside him had cracked open – he hadn’t realized how much he wanted to see you like this, to hear that laughter, to witness the unfiltered joy in your face.

His heart pounded against his rib cage, thrumming in his ears like a chaotic rhythm, and for a moment, he was paralyzed by the strange, unfamiliar sensation washing over him.

How had you managed to convince him to take care of that beast? That thing would undoubtedly invade every corner of your life... and, by extension, his.

He couldn’t understand it.

Was he ill? Dying?

But then you called his name, your voice soft, sweet, still laced with that bright smile that now adorned your face as if it always belonged there. And in that instant, he knew. With dawning horror, he realized what was happening.

His tongue felt heavy, his chest unbearably tight, and his left eye twitched erratically. He took a giant step backward, trying to ground himself, then another, and another, until he melted into the shadows, disappearing without a word.

Alastor realized, with a deep, unsettling dread, that he fancied you.

Follow #vexitober 2024 to read my questionable kink/fluff stories!

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starboye · 4 months ago

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pairing: steve rogers x male reader

request: Captain America falls in love with his fellow big bubble butt Twunk male reader avenger. Steve asked him on a date which leads to Steve and male reader losing their virginity on the first date; which eventually has them both in a long term married life full of happiness, love, and hot steamy sex with the super soldier with his big hung 🍆 and a twunk with the big 🍑.

warnings: smut, both of you are virgins, cursing, and fluff

a/n: idk how I feel about this one, it feels a lil iffy

you had just gotten back from your most recent mission where you had to stop some robbers from getting away with some stolen bank money with steve and lets just say it wasn't the easiest thing ever as it seemed like steve was occupied thinking on something else "hey what was that out there you seemed preoccupied" you say playfully nudging him "oh it was nothing just thinking" he stammers trying to avoid eye contact with you "well leave the thinking for off the field" you chuckle "yeah" he smiles.

just before you get out the door steve calls out "hey y/n would you wanna go out to dinner sometimes" he asks nervously "are you asking me on a date rogers" you ask with a grin "yeah i guess i a-" he says before getting cut off by the feeling of you kissing his cheek "well than its a date" you say smiling before walking away as steve stands there as his heart is pounding so hard it feels like it gonna burst out his chest.

you meet steve at a fancy restaurant and you guys find a table "I just wanna say you look amazing" he says "well thank you I'd say you look rather dashing yourself" you chuckle "thanks" steve says, you order your food and it soon comes out "wow this looks amazing, how did you even manage to book a place like this I heard they always have a full house" you inquire "compliments to tony he pulled a couple of strings" he says "I'll be sure to say thanks".

after finishing dinner you both walk down the street talking about the latest drama in the avengers compound "hey do you wanna go back to my place" you ask him "y- yeah I would love to" steve stammers at the sudden question before you grab steves hand and playfully run to your apartment, when you get to your apartment you show a nervous steve around.

"sorry it's a little messy I haven't been here in a while" you laugh throwing away done trash that was on your counter and kicking some clothes out the way "oh dont worry my place doesn't look any better" he says looking for some place to sit "oh yeah you can sit on the couch" you say moving some junk off the couch before sitting down on it with steve.

"I really enjoyed tonight" steve says with the biggest smile on his face "I did too" you say admiring steve, after a few seconds of silence steve leans in and kisses you before jumping back just as quickly "I'm sorry I didn't mean too do that" he tries to quickly apologize "don't be sorry I liked it" you say moving onto steves lap and kissing him deeper than before, his hands move to you back holding it firmly.

"should we" you trail off "I'm okay with it if you are" steve says with a bigger smile than before him now about to sleep with his first and best of all his crush "I am" you say taking your shirt off leaving your torso exposed for steve, he feels up and down your body watching how your nipples perk up with each light touch from his digits "you okay there big boy" you chuckle "y-yeah just new to this whole thing" steve says still amazed by your body.

"don't worry it's my first time too" you reassure "really" steve says, on the outside he seemed calm but on the inside he was freaking out at the feeling knowing he was gonna be your first and you were gonna be his first "you wanna take this off" you ask tugging at the hem of his shirt, he quickly obliges and takes off his shirt his broad body now on full display for you.

you run your fingers along his chest, tracing random shapes and admiring his figure "you wanna maybe do it" steve nervously asks "id be happy to" you say getting up and putting on a mini show for steve, stripping off your pants and underwear in an erotic way, you watch as steve follows every one of your movements with his eyes his cock now begging to be let out of its confines.

"how about we get these off of you" you say pulling steves pants off and watching his dick jump out and stand up straight resembling the american flag "I didn't expect you to have a dick like this" you say stunned by the mans large dick "well the super soldier serum enhanced some other things to" steve chuckles "well either way it still looks delicious" you say licking his tip slowly watching him shudder under your touch.

"how are you so good at that" steve asks trying to avoid your seductive gaze "I don't know maybe I just learned it" you say licking his slit, "I bet your bussy feels better" steve says choking down a moan "what" you say holding back a laugh "what" he says innocently "did you just say bussy" you ask almost laughing "what I heard it off porn" he says shrugging his shoulders "yeah you're in desperate need of some hole it seems" you say straddling his bare lap.

steves breath hitches in his throat at the bare feeling "can I kiss you" steve asks trying to control his breathing "you don't have to ask me steve" you say pulling him into a kiss "I wanna feel you" steve begs "okay okay" you chuckle before smearing some saliva on his dick "okay three, two, one" you cut down before sinking onto his dick slowly with a moan.

steves hands quickly find their way to your hips and tightly hold them in place, you sit there for a couple seconds and get used to his large size before looking at him with a "are you okay" look and he replies with a nod, you lift up and sink back down in a rhythm with steve groaning at each move, "I feel like I'm gonna cum already" he says with tightly shut eyes before throwing his head back.

"me too" you moan, your moan brings steves head back up to watch you moan all over him, a dream he's jerked off to multiple times in one day "never did I think id have this chance with you" steve scoffs "well here I am now" you kiss steve before moaning into his mouth as you sink down again "fuck" you huff before cumming all over steves stomach him watching in full awe.

"nghhh" he moans next as he cums in you, his teeth tightened together and eyes shut as his hips erratically thrust upwards trying to ride out his high, after a few more seconds steve finishes and lets out a long breathy huff "fuck that was good" you say dropping your head on his shoulder "sorry for cumming so fast" steve sweetly apologizes "you're good you felt to good" you say "well thank you" he smiles.

it may have only been the first date but steve already wanted to marry you he thought of this so hard he didn't even realize he was staring at you "earth to steve, you okay" you ask with a chuckle "yeah just thinking" he reassures with a smile "you sure do think a lot" you say laying your head back down on his chest "you have no idea" Steve says.

#steve rogers #steve rogers x male reader #captain america #x male smut #x male reader #gay smut #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n

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lunajay33 · 6 months ago

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Taste for Older Men Part.2

•⚰️🍂🍑•

Summary: Growing up with you never had much interest in boys your age but when your dads best friends stuck around more everything changed

Pairing: Cowboy Negan x f!reader

Warnings: age gap, evil boyfriend

Part.1

•Masterlist•

It’s been a week since everything happened, my parents have been extremely over supportive always, when I’d come down for breakfast they’d have wide smiles and cheery voices but I couldn’t hate them for it they’re just trying to make me feel better even though I was already happier than I’ve ever been in my life

I still work everyday at Negans farm but my parents still don’t know that we’re together and we’re not quite sure how to tell them, I mean he’s my dads best friend and I don’t want to ruin that but I also can’t give up Negan he’s all I’ve ever wanted so there’s got to be a way

I was in the barn pitch forking up some loose hay when I feel Negans arms wrap around my waist

“You know if I was gonna get more help around here I’d have told you my feelings way earlier” I laugh as I lean back into his chest

“Watch yourself lil lady I’m still your boss remember”

“Oh I remember” he spins me in his arms resting my hands on his shoulders

“So how do we tell my parents I don’t want to sneak around I want to be able to be with you when we’re around other people”

“I know sunshine, old man invited me over tonight to watch football might tell him then, and you can talk to your mother” I feel nervous about this but it needs to be done

“Hopefully they don’t rip my head off”

“If they’re going that route it’ll be me they rip apart” me smiles as he leans down to kiss me his grey speckled beard scratching against my face but it was something I craved when he wasn’t around

“Come on let’s finish up our chores before you get carried away like last time” I laugh as he groans

I got home early as Negan let me off to get ready for tonight and go through everything I want to say to my mom, he wanted that time too he had more to worry about but my father is an understanding man I just home he can understand this too

I stripped off my dirty work clothes and hoped in the shower, relaxing as the dirt and sweat from the day washed away down the drain, after I was all squeaky clean I got dressed in a casual pair of black leggings and a red long sleeve shirt, putting two braids in my hair then waiting on my bed anxiously

After another hour I picked up my phone and dialed Negan, after two rings I hear his voice and everything seemed to not be as stressful

“Hey baby ya alright?”

“Yeah I’m better now, just nervous”

“Don’t stress honey I’m on my way over now, we’ll get this settled” he said with a calming tone

“Okay I’ll see you soon”

We hung up and I made my way downstairs sitting at the kitchen island waiting to hear the rumble of his truck, soon the headlights shine through the window and he’s knocking at the door

I want to rush to the door and through my arms around him but contain myself and let my dad answer, Negans technically his guest anyways

“Negan! You excited for the game buddy?” My dad asked cheerfully as he patted him on the shoulder

“You bet, I meet you in the lounge soon I’ll go say hi to your wife and y/n!”

“Always with the southern hospitality!”

Negan rounded the corner and came into the kitchen where me and my mother sat I couldn’t help the huge smile that stretched my cheeks

“Negan so wonderful to see you again, last time was a bit crazy” I looked down a little embarrassed by that whole fiasco

“Lovely to see you too, and of course my dear little farm hand” he said brushing his hand down my back out of my mothers gaze making my skin chill

“Oh Negan she’s still behaving well isn’t she?”

“Mother of course I am”

“Don’t worry she’s always a great help, got myself a lil working lady”

I look up at him with so much joy and admiration before my mother clear her throat and snaps us out of our moment

“Well here’s two beers, better get in there before he makes a big deal about us stealing you away again” she laughed handing over the beers and began left the room

I look back at my mother who had a knowing look on her face, raised eyebrow with a slight smirk

“What?”

“I’m not stupid sweetie, I’ve seen the way you looked at him since he started coming around, only recently he’s been giving you the same look soooooo you have something to tell me dear”

“Don’t be mad, what I feel for him is real, how he treats me really show how badly Mike treated me and how much Negan treats me like a goddess, he’s a good man”

“I’m not mad, I’m glad you found a man who can treat you the way you deserve, hopefully your father will look at it the same way”

I down now we wait to either hear a fight or Negan comes out smiling

“WHAT?” I hear from the lounge, oh no

I rush into the lounge seeing my dad up in Negans face and he looked more betrayed than angry

“Dad, calm down it’s okay”

“How is this okay my best friend with my daughter”

“I love her f/n” he went silent and so did I this was the first time Negans declared his love

“You love me?” I ask as I step closer

“Of course I do, you’re a wonderful woman every moment with you I feel more happier and at ease than I’ve ever been”

“I love you too sunshine” I lean up to wrap my arms around his neck and he held me tight

“F/n, you know Negan and he’ll treat her right compared to that excuse for a boyfriend she had before” my mom said then hearing my dad sigh

“I know it’s just a lot to wrap my head around, when did this happen?”

“The day we had the barbecue, he came and made me feel better about everything that happened and well our feelings just came out”

“I mean me and your mother knew how you felt about Negan it was pretty obvious, I guess I can eventually get use to this”

“My god was it that obvious?” I ask looking up at Negan and he had a sly smirk

“You didn’t make it sneaky when you’d look at me darlin”

Taglist: @azanoni @scorpioempress @fanficwriter5 @elliesr1fle @imimatcha4life @indigosparkle444

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pandorxxx · 1 year ago

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Spoiled

Read part 1 here:

Neteyam x omatikayan fem reader (all aged up)

Warnings: HEAVY SMUT, cursing, soft-dom Neteyam, brat-Tamer, oral (both receiving and giving. Neteyam eats 🍑 in this one, sorry if you’re not into that). P in v, multiple orgasms, creampie, daddy kink, praise kink (kinda).

Synopsis: Ever since you and Neteyam decided to make it official, you had been nothing but a nightmare for him. And when he walked into the hut from a long day without your favorite fruit, there was no way you were going to let him slide.

🔞mdni🔞

It had been exactly 5 months since your 21st birthday extravaganza. 5 months since you and Neteyam decided to make it official. When you both told your parents, they were very happy for you both. Your father especially because he knew what a promising young man Neteyam was, and the fact that he would undeniably make a great mate. The relationship was going great…for you. Neteyam did everything in his power to keep you satisfied.

But if he was being honest, you were a complete nightmare. More bratty and selfish than you were when you were single. And let’s not forget to mention how needy you were. But he took it, because he loved you so much. But boy, was he getting sick and tired of you.

He would walk home from his long day of training, and stand outside of the door. Basking in the last few minutes he had alone before he had to deal with you.

He sighed deeply, walking into the hut. His eyes landed on your small figure, admiring yourself in the mirror. Hell, that was all you ever did.

“Did you get my fruit?” You asked, pulling your braids into a ponytail as you watched him walk to the cot languidly.

“Hello to you too.” He spoke sarcastically, plopping down on the cot. You frowned, turning to him with an angry glare. His eyes shot to you and he sighed, closing his eyes briefly to maintain his patience.

“Baby, the fruit you want isn’t in season right now. Remember? I told you that.” He gestured calmly. You stomped your foot like an angry child, walking over to him.

“But that’s what I want, Teyammm!” You whined, getting on your knees in-front of him as he sat on the edge of the bed.

“Baby, I understand that. And you know I’d get them for you if I could. I’ve looked everywhere, and they’re just nowhere to be found.” He explained, caressing your cheek as you pouted up at him. You smacked his hand away harshly, making him clench his jaw in restraint with a low groan.

“Ugh! You’re so annoying. Why don’t you just look HARDER!” You shouted, smacking his chest, only for him to have no reaction.

“Ok, y/n.” He muttered, standing to his feet in-front of you, walking over to the dresser to take his war belt off. You cocked an eyebrow, turning around to face him.

“OK? What does that mean?” You asked with aggression, standing to your full height.

“It means that I’m done talking. And I’d advise you do the same, because i am not in the mood for this shit tonight.” He shook his head, removing his woven necklace, placing it on the dresser.

You eyed him up and down in shock. He was becoming angry with you, and you knew that. You also knew that the only way to get what you wanted, was to play nice. So like always, you played your roll. Your demeanor softening into a sad pout. You walked over to him, turning him around to face you.

“What’s wrong now?” He asked sarcastically with a low sigh to follow. You shot him puppy dog eyes, and his demeanor immediately softened. You had him wrapped around your little finger.

“I hate when you get upset with me, Teyam. You’re gonna make me cry.” You whimpered, eyes becoming watery. You were such a great actress, you could cry on instant. After all, You had a lot of time to practice on your father. That’s how you got everything you wanted.

“No, baby. Don’t cry, please? I-im sorry. I’ll do whatever I have to, ok? I’ll get your fruit, Princess.” He reassured you, caressing your flushed cheeks. You sniffled, trailing your dainty hands down his chest.

“When?” You asked, cocking an eyebrow at him as your hands trailed over his abs. “First thing Tomorrow morning. They’ll be here before you wake up, I promise.” He nodded, pecking your forehead.

“You’re the best, you know that?” You asked, your hand finding the band of his loincloth. He smiled, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“Oh, baby. I’ll be my absolute best for you, and only you.” He confessed. Your hand made its way to his covered cock, palming it gently. His entire body froze, sucking in a sharp breath as he stared into your eyes.

“And how can I ever repay you, daddy?” You smiled, leaving small kisses on his chest. He let out a satisfied groan, throwing his head back.

“I-I would answer, but I’m assuming you already have something in mind Princess.” He strained, feeling his loincloth become looser and looser around his hips before it fell to the ground. You spit in your hand before connecting it to his throbbing cock, jerking it slowly. A series of curses and moans left his mouth as he watched you play with his cock.

“I can’t wait to get my fruit tomorrow. But until then….I think I’ll just snack on you instead. How’s that sound?” You asked sensually, speeding up the pace on his huge cock.

“Sounds good, Princess. Sooo s-so good.” He moaned, watching you slide down to your knees in-front of him. Without another moment to spare, you attached your mouth to his length, bobbing your head slowly as you stared up at him with lustful eyes.

“Oh my- f-fucking God. Juuust like that.” He muttered through a clenched jaw, holding the sides of your head as leverage to buck his hips into your mouth.

You hummed on him, swirling your tongue around his tip. You made it slow and sloppy for him, letting your spit cascade down your neck and breasts.

“Fuuck yes.” He groaned, watching you through hooded eyes, mouth slightly agape with low pants seeping through. You opened your mouth wider, letting him fuck your face just how he wanted to. He picked up the pace, the squelching and gagging noises egging him on.

“I-Im gonna cum, baby. G-Gonna cum!” He moaned, tucking both of his lips away, eyebrows scrunched as his eyes locked with yours.

“Mhmmm!” You hummed, eyes rolling in pleasure as you watched him fall apart. That was all he needed. His large hand found the top of the dresser, clawing at the wood as his eyes rolled back. Loud whimpers left his mouth before he released in yours. Your cheeks swelling with his seed. You let it trickle down your throat with a satisfied hum. He pulled out of your mouth slowly, a loud gasp leaving your swollen lips as he watched the lines of spit that connected you two.

“Fuuuck, girl. You’re gonna be the death of me.” He chuckled breathily, leaning back on the wall in exhaustion.

“Well don’t die yet. I’m horny now.” You pouted, untying your top and throwing it to the side. He looked down at you with low eyes, shaking his head with a light chuckle.

“When are you not horny?” He asked, rubbing his hands down his face in complete exhaustion. You crossed your arms, rolling your eyes at him. He sighed loudly.

“Whenever you want me, I give it to you. But right now…I’m so fucking tired. You have worn me out babe. And if you want me to be energized enough to go get your fruit, I need some sleep.” He explained, walking over to the cot slowly. You huffed, getting off of the ground to turn him around. “I want it.” You commanded, pouting up at him with your arms crossed.

“What, do you think I’m your Fuck toy or something? Huh? You know I am a whole person outside of just being your boyfriend? It’s been a long day, and I’m tired. And that little performance you just gave…only put the icing on the cake for me. So please….please just let me sleep.” He begged, hands intertwined with each other as he awaited an answer.

“Teyammm! Let me get on top then. You won’t even have to do anything but lay there.” You whined, caressing his biceps. He trailed your body for a moment, thinking about how good you would look riding him. With a low sigh, he finally gave in.

“You sure do know how to get what you want. Spoiled ass.” He smirked, backing up into the cot before taking a seat. You untied your loincloth swiftly, tossing it the the side of the room before straddling his lap.

“Whatever. Lay back.” You commanded, pushing him back with force. You two had been having sex long enough to not have a repeat of last time. So in one swift motion, you grabbed his cock, lining it up with your entrance to slowly slide down on him.

“Finally…I’m getting what I want.” You moaned, placing your hands on his broad chest, using it as leverage to bounce on him with full force.

“I-I always give you what you want. You’d kill me if I didn’t.” He spoke breathily, watching your breasts bounce with every subtle movement.

“Mmm hush!” You whined, eyes rolling to the back of your head as his swollen tip slammed into your sweetspot with every bounce of your hips.

His hands trailed down to your ass, gripping the plush flesh with his bottom lip tucked between his teeth to keep him quiet like you asked. Soft grunts and groans rumbling in his chest with every harsh meeting of his pelvis to yours.

“Teyammm, w-why are you so quiet? Am I not doing it right?” You whined, eyes meeting his. He looked at you completely dumbfounded.

“You t-told me t- mmm!- to hush. You’re doing so good, baby. Sooo so good!” He moaned, head titled back in complete bliss as his face scrunched in pleasure. He was so close, he could feel his muscles tensing and his heart racing until…you stopped with one hard bounce to his pelvis, almost knocking the wind out of him. He opened his eyes instantly, being met with your all too familiar angry demeanor.

“What? What could I have possibly done NOW?!” He shouted, rolling his eyes at you. “You’re annoying me! Being all quiet and shit. What is that supposed to mean? That I’m not doing my job, huh?” You asked, tilting your head as you awaited an answer.

“You told me to be quiet, DAMN! Do you not remember that?” He asked, gesturing wildly as his muscles tensed in anger. You rolled your eyes with a loud groan.

“NO I DONT REMEMBER THAT!” You shouted, smacking his chest hard enough to leave a handprint, but he still had no reaction to it. He ran his hands down his face with a loud growl.

“Holy shit Y/n, You’re driving me nuts! Just get up, I’m done with your shit tonight.” He sighed, placing his hands on your torso to lift you off of him. You smacked his hands away harshly. “NO!” You shouted, staying in place stubbornly.

“Hit me one more time…” His tone was serious, and dark. You loved to push neteyam’s buttons, but you knew when it was time to stop. And this was definitely the time. But, you felt like pushing him alittle further tonight, maybe you could wake the beast in him…the one you met the night of your party.

“Or what?” You challenged, eyebrow cocked as you awaited an answer. “Fuck around and find out. How about that?” He snarled, eyeing you up and down. You shot him a sarcastic smile, raising your hand to hit him again. But before it could connect to his chest, he had flipped both of you over, his arms engulfing your head.

“You’re such a fucking brat.” He spoke lowly, shifting your legs over his shoulders with one hand, completely folding you in half. He began to thrust into you, hard and deep, still maintaining a somewhat slow pace. Just so you could feel all of him, deep inside of your slippery cunt. After all, this was now considered a punishment.

“Too deep, Too deep, Teyammm!” You moaned, eyes rolling to the back of your head as you tapped his thigh, essentially tapping out.

“Hush! Not another fucking word. I’m sick of you talking.” He growled, pecking your agape lips as he fed you the deepest strokes you’d ever gotten. Loud squelching noises and heavy grunts flooded the room.

“I-Im sorry Tey! I’m sorry!” You nodded lazily, giving him those puppy dog eyes that seemed to work so well on him. “Not trying to hear that shit right now.” He shook his head with a dark chuckle, rolling his hips into you.

“Ohhh fuuuck.” You squealed, wrapping your trembling arms around his neck gently, bringing him dangerously close to you. So close that you could feel his breath tickling your nose. The eye contact was lethal as he drilled into you at an agonizingly slow pace. So deep you could feel him in your stomach.

“I-I hate you…sooo much.” You moaned, throwing your head back in absolute bliss. He knew that whenever you would tell him that, an intense release would follow.

“Gonna cum, huh? I know you like the back of my fucking hand, Princess.” He chuckled breathily, using the opportunity to leave kisses on your exposed neck.

“Yesss, I’m so close Tey!” You whimpered, shifting your trembling legs to the side of his hips. He began to speed up the pace, kissing every inch of your neck and jaw.

“Mhm, cum for me Princess. Be as loud as you want. Let everyone know that your spoiled ass belongs to me. I’m the only one that can handle you, right?” He asked breathily, in between kisses.

“Yes Teyammm!” You whined loudly, eyes rolling to the back of your head as your entire body began to tremble at once.

“Fuuuck, this is the only time I like to hear you scream my name.” He moaned, watching you come undone beneath him. Your juices flowed out of you with every slow thrust, making their way to the sheets.

“I-I want more. give me MORE!” You whined, in the middle of your peek. He shook his head with a slight chuckle.

“Any more and we’re gonna have to sleep on the ground. You’re making a mess, baby.” He explained, pulling out of you slowly, watching the rest of your essence cascade out of you like a river.

“One more time, Teyam! I-I’m so fucking hot for you.” You moaned, turning around in-front of him. You laid your head on the bed as your hips stayed mounted in the air. You spread your knees farther apart, opening yourself up to him.

“Oh my-“ he muttered under his breath, smacking your plush ass with a low groan. His mouth began to water, licking his lips as he admitted your dripping cunt. He bent down, immediately attaching his lips to your clit, flicking his tongue against the ball of nerves. You let out a low moan, spreading your legs a little wider for him.

He held your cheeks open to get better access, completely devouring your sensitive heat. He sucked on your clit like a pacifier before licking a long stripe up to your ass, swirling his tongue around to hole.

“Yesss, juuust like that daddy!” You moaned, a delirious smile plastered across your face in pleasure.

He began to French kiss your ass, letting his spit cascade down his chin. With a low hum, he stuck his tongue out, wiggling his head in between your cheeks, making your tail sway high in excitement with small whimpers falling from your precious lips. He sent it one last peck before he stood back up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“You taste so good princess. Just like the fruit you’ve been nagging me about for the past week.” He chuckled, sending a hard smack to your ass once more.

“I know that. FUCK ME.” You frowned, backing your ass up into him. He smiled, lining his cock up with your entrance before plunging into you.

“So fucking cocky. You just think you’re so hot, huh?” He asked, thrusting into hard and deep.

“I-I am hot, daddy. You don’t think so?” You moaned breathily, gripping the sheets so hard that your knuckles were white.

“You know how I feel, you just wanna hear me say it.” He moaned, mouth slightly agape as he watched your ass smack against his pelvis. The sweet music ringing through the entire hut, along with your pornographic moans that he loved so much. He shifted his hips up, jamming into that sensitive sweet spot of yours repeatedly. You bit your lip with a satisfied smile, shifting your head on the cot to look back at him.

“You like that? Hmm?” He asked with a sensual tone, smacking your bruised ass a few times, earning a few low hums in satisfaction from you. You let out a small giggle in response, followed by a series a curses as your stomach muscles started to tense.

“I-I’m gonna cum, Teyammm!” You moaned, eyes rolling to the back of your head as you began to push your hips back into him to meet his rhythm.

“Shiiiittt! me too, baby.” He groaned, speeding up the pace. He threw his head back, loud growls rumbling in his chest. His thrusts became sloppy, cock twitching inside of you from his incoming orgasm.

“Oh my God, Yesssss! I’m- I-“ you cried, an intense release following. Your entire body twitching with each deep stroke. Your walls fluttering around him caught his attention. He looked down, admiring his cream coated cock with every thrust.

“Mmm, did you get what you wanted, Princess? Have I satisfied you enough?” He asked with a hint of sarcasm. But in reality, all he ever wanted to do was make you feel good. If you were happy, he was happy.

“Yes, daddy! I-I love you! I love you sooo much!” You moaned breathily, coming down from your high.

“Ohhh baby. I love you more!” He moaned, sending you one last thrust before painting your fluttering walls with his seed. You could feel the liquid trickling down into your womb, filling it up just right. A series of moans leaving his and your mouth as you both came down from your peeks. He pulled out, watching his seed flow down your trembling thighs.

“Can I go to sleep now princess?” He asked, grabbing a cloth to clean you up first. Silence followed, not even a hum in agreement.

“Y/n?” He asked, shifting around to see you cooing with your eyes shut tightly. Your legs slowly buckled to the cot, laying you completely flat. He chuckled to himself, wiping your thighs one last time.

“What am I going to do with you, Princess?…”

Taglist: @number1gal @loak-bae @tiredmamaissy @neytirishottie @viajaeger @terrorthewolf @lethargicluv @reyzzsostellar @m0nst3rfk3r @agelsully @jakescumdump @wekiamo @st-cass @cleardonutangelwagon @tsireqas @satanlovedays @afro-hispwriter @urfavgirlmakenna @fanboyluvr @iameatingmyhair @secretflowerobservation @violet-19999 @xreadersstuff @sweetllamaparadise @lia-nath @sullymenrhot @dotheyevenknowmars @xdbluesky @slay-nt @domino-x3-blog @ladylovegood-69 @itssomeonereading @sweetirilly @skxawngmia @j-jinxee @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @cumikering @pxndorasdream @itsaleidasworld @atxxokirina @yeletta @blueslxt-primary @jackchampismybbg @eywascall @valeriearriana37484 @avatarsslut @bee782916 @atxxokirina @taylormarieee @loaksdog

#avatar #avatar smut #avatar the way of water #neteyam #neteyam fanfiction #neteyam smut #neteyam x reader #neteyam headcanons #neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan #neteyam sully #avatar neteyam #neteyam x y/n #avatar loak #loak headcanons #loak x reader #loak x y/n #loak smut

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gadriezmannsgirl · 8 months ago

Note

Can you write one where reader teases Fermin because he’s pretty short 🤏🏼 compared to other players and Fermin takes it too seriously and becomes insecure and then reader tells him it’s not a big deal and that she loves him being a shortie with a big ass 🍑 or smth like that with fluff in the end ☺️

Thank you

Warnings: A tiny bit of d*ck sizes conversation, hints of morning love, mentions of Fermín's big ass (Yes, that's a warning); mr. sunshine is a bit insecure 'cus of his height in the fic, nothing major or explicit happens

Lack and Excess -F.L16

Summary: Your boyfriend's insecure about his height but don't worry, you reassure him that despite his short height you love him either way

"Let me get that for you, preciosa" You hear your ten months boyfriend say, you were making some lunch seeing as your parents and two younger siblings were coming over to have a nice evening with you and your boyfriend, Fermín at his house.

"It's okay, mi amor. I can get that"

"Shush" He said tapping your bum softly

"¡Fermín!" He laughs winking at you as he extends his arm to reach for the plates, however his fingers couldn't reach them. He sighed and got on his tip toes managing to bring them down and in front of you

"Seeing as you want to help" You began with a smile "I need your help to bring down here that salad bowl"

"No worries"

"But you can actually lift me up so I can pull it down"

"I can do that" You give him a look

"Venga amor, it's not time to show anything. It'll be easier and faster if you lift me up, my parents are going to be here in approximately thirty minutes and I still need to get ready"

"I'll be fast, don't worry. I'll just go, grab it and give it to you so you can do that delicious salad I'm already dreaming of" You smile blushing at his comment

"Rápido, López" (Quick, López) He got in front of the counter and got on his tip toes but still with that he couldn't reach the bowl

After a few minutes of trying and even jumping a bit, he turned to you and mentioned for you to come "Done?" You asked but he didn't said anything, in fact, he didn't even looked at you, only at the floor.

You felt his arms wrap around your waist and pull you up, your hands instantly went to his shoulders, you grabbed the bowl and a few seconds later he pulled you back on your feet.

"Gracias" (Thank you) He hums still not looking at you, you kissed his cheek several times to thank him; you can clearly sense that he got upset "Fer" You call him forgetting about the salad

"What's up, amor?"

"Are you upset?"

"Why would I be?"

"Let me rephrase that... I know you're upset what I don't know, it's why. You were sunshine-smiling a few seconds ago and now you have this angry face"

"You don't know if I'm upset"

"We may not have ten years together yet but we do have ten months and during those months I have been dating you, I got to know you and everything about you. I know how to read you. I know when something's bothering you, I know when you're happy, I know when you wanna leave a place, I know when you wanna cry, when you're mad, everything Fermín. And you do the same for me. Please, tell me why are you upset?"

He looked at you and the looked at the floor "Because I'm short" He mumbles

"Ah?"

"Because I'm short" He repeats again

"What does it have with you being short?"

"Everything. It has everything. On the pitch I can't do most headers, it's really putting me off people are doubting me because of that and now off pitch, I can't even bring down to my girlfriend a simple salad bowl. Can you believe that?"

"It's also normal for girls to have short boyfriends, I don't understand what you're going for"

"Why did you choose me?"

"What do you mean?"

"I have seen your ex boyfriend's, Y/N. All of them are at least two heads taller than me"

"So what? Fer, I don't care about their heights, I don't even care about yours! And please don't get me wrong, I love you and your height, I meant it as I don't really pay attention to it, yes, we're almost the same height with you being a few inches taller than me, so what? Yes, my exes's were way more taller than me but so what? They also called me little and I felt insecure in that time but I don't care about it now. You shouldn't care about what other people might say about you, you know who you are and what you are. Your family and friends know that too. I know that too. And that's all it should matter to you"

"You're perfect just the way you are, mi amor. I'm short and that's the way I'll be. You're short and that's how you'll be. However, we as a couple can help each other and be one single tall person. That's good for me and it should also be good for you, Fer"

"It is"

"It doesn't look like"

"You gotta understand me, preciosa. I see all these couples where the girl can't do something and the guy is always there to help her, I wanna be that for you but I can't because I'm short"

"We're an unique couple and we don't need for the other to do all the work, like I said we can do the work together" You smile "I really like the fact we're almost the same height and you may be small but you have such a big heart, a big personality, you're a big person in general; what you lack in height you make up for with other things" You say and soon you see a smile coming to Fermín's face

"What other things?" He wraps his arms around you bringing you into him

"Such a dirty minded you are!" He laughs "But you do have a big ass and I love my shortie bofyriend with big ass"

"And what about my-?"

"You know I love him and his size as well" You cut him off with a big smile on your face and some blush covering your cheeks

"I love how shy you can get when you were going at it this morning"

"Shut up" You hit his chest softly "I love you, all of you" You put emphasis on your words making him smile widely "I gotta go and shower" You slap his bum twice before receiving a few slaps back, you smile and kiss his lips

"Can I join you?"

"No!"

"Why not"

"My parents will be here anytime"

"Oh come on!"

°°° °°° °°° °°°

Taglist: @gaviymarcsbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld @http-isabela

#gadriezmannsgirl writes #fc barcelona #fermin x reader #fermin lopez #fermin lopez x reader #fermin #fc barca #football players x reader #football players fanfic #football imagines

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jasminerva · 1 month ago

Text

You v. Nagumo and Toddler

This is Part 2 of the Papa!Gumo series!

gn!reader co-parent

Check out Part 1 here: What kind of father would Nagumo be?

Want more? Check out my SakaDays Masterlist!

Comments, reblogs, tags appeachiated~! 🍑

Banner img from Gakuen Babysitters by Tokeino Hari.

Was having a convo with @akifordessert about Papagumo and the nicknames he'd give his kiddo(s). And thank you, Memi (@dearsecretlover) for inspo and motivation (and for sharing this Papa!gumo art by mxeong__) as always~!

But I digress! Here's the little scolding imagine I promised!

nagumo x gn!reader = gn!toddler in their terrible twos [c/n] = your toddler's name [f/n] = your first name

You: Nagumo! [c/n]! What the heck happened in the living room?! Nagumo looked around his surroundings. It was as if the usually orderly living room had two tornadoes sweep through it, an explosion of scattered toys everywhere, overturned furniture, ripped paper decorations, and colourful fingerprints adorning the walls. Nagumo & Your Toddler: (both in a kneeling position, getting scolded by you) Nagumo: (trying not to grin) [f/n], it's no biggie. Just some father-child bonding gone awry. [c/n], your rambunctious toddler, mirrored his pose perfectly beside him, eyes wide with feigned innocence that couldn't hide the sparkle of mischief dancing in their depths. Nagumo couldn't help but feel a swell of pride at his miniature accomplice's acting skills. You: Oh, really? Father-child? But I only see two children in front of me. Nagumo: Now, now! (holds hands up) See? No paint on my hands. (wiggles digits) Clearly, I'm just an innocent bystander here. You: Yeah, that doesn't help your case. You're the adult in this disorderly duo, or did you forget? Nagumo: I suppose cleaning duty falls upon us two, hmm? Let's clean up this mess before it becomes an international incident. He cast a conspiratorial wink at your toddler, who giggled delightedly at being included in their imaginary fellowship against their ever-so-serious parent. You: (sighs) Nagumo... I'm sick of having to be the mean parent--let alone adult--in this relationship. They have to learn how to clean up their own messes eventually, you know. Nagumo: You're right. We can't let them run wild like this. But it's just so hard to discipline this angelic face (tickles [c/n]'s chubby cheek, causing them to erupt into a fit of laughter, squirming happily). You: (unimpressed face) Nagumo: All right. (playful but stern enough tone) Focus, Agent [c/n], your mission, should you choose to accept it... Together, Nagumo and [c/n] tackled the mess, turning cleaning into a fun game of hide-and-seek with the scattered toys and art supplies.

Nagumo: (grabs a juice from the fridge) You: Nagumo! [c/n] doesn't need more sugar! Nagumo's grin widened into a smirk as your toddler took advantage of the situation and quickly gulped down the forbidden juice. Nagumo: Aw, shucks. Looks like we're too late. You: (narrowing eyes) If [c/n] doesn't end up learning anything, I'm going to discipline you both. In the 'mean parent' way. Nagumo: (clapping) All right, Agent [c/n]! Operation Clean Slate isn't complete until Big Boss says so. Your Toddler: (salutes and gets back to cleaning, hands and mouth sticky with juice) Nagumo: (grins and walks towards you) You know, [f/n], you were pretty convincing right then. I almost believed you'd actually punish me. You: (crosses arms) The day's still young. Nagumo: (leans down to whisper in your ear) Is that a promise?

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brotherwtf · 1 month ago

Note

bucky being unable to keep his hands off gale’s cheeks (😊 and 🍑) is very special and important to me

everyone and their mother understands the appeal of Gale's cheeks (boffem)

I'm gonna step on my soap box bcs I think John would love to squeeze Gale's cheeks whenever he can, I mean he does it in canon (thank you Callum Turner you fucking animal) holds his face and squishes his fingers into the soft give of them, likes to hold it while he kisses him

he's literally so upset when Gale loses all of that weight in the Stalag, he can't quite get as firm of a grip on his face when he goes in for a smooch, makes it his life mission to be a good housewife and make Gale good meals to get some weight back on him, bites his cheek between his teeth until they're perfect and flushed

worships his ass the same damn way, takes great handfuls of it in his hands whenever he can, especially when he's kissing Gale, just runs his hands down to squeeze it and sometimes, continues to do it despite Gale's protests

he'll force Gale onto the bed and rip his pants off, go to town on his ass, kissing and licking and biting until Gales squirming from being overstimulated, trying to shove John away but he just hooks his arms around Gale's thighs to keep him in place, could stay there for hours and hours if he could

goddammit John is living the dream

#clegan #mota #buck x bucky #john egan #gale cleven #asks

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justasecretflower · 2 months ago

Text

🌸- that’s a two man! JJK men being in a two man! With reader and readers best friend

~ fluff

CW- for Toji and Shiu being weird with their s/os🙄

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Geto and Gojo.

- This is obviously before they broke up- I mean they stopped being friends.

- Gojo is the one organizing all the double dates (and paying)

- Gojo has a competition on who can spend more money on their s/o

- Geto is the one that takes his s/o away from the chaos of Gojo and his s/o to give his s/o some kisses or to wrap his arms around them for a split second. Basking in his love and enjoying the quiet

- The way Geto softens and lights up around his s/o makes EVERYONE jealous. It’s so obvious.

-Geto whispers lovingly in his s/os ear when Gojo is preoccupied

9.5/10 two man. The perfect balance.

Toji and Shiu

- Toji and shiu are always in a competition on who’s s/o is hotter, often going as far as trying to point out who has the bigger 🍒 or 🍑

- shiu makes fun of Toji for not being able to spoil his s/o because he’s broke.

- Toji is so openly sexual with his s/o like

-shiu is the more romantic one.

- If toji is really in love with his S/O then he’d light up and become way more gentle. So points to him for that.

- shiu pays for outings.

- likes to see their s/os all “dolled up”

- they gossip like teenage girls and it’s honestly really amusing.

8.5/10 Toji is broke but that’s okay.

Ino and Nanami

- Nanami pulls out chairs for you, opens doors for you, kisses your hand during dinner dates.

-Ino bullies you

- Dw it’s his love language!

- Ino is much more entertaining and funny.

-Nanami is the more romantic, traditional kind.

-it makes for an interesting hangout.

- Ino is loudly kissing his s/o all over while Nanami gives his judgy face and modestly has a warm hand on his s/os lower back/ interlacing each others fingers.

- Nanami, “my darling”

- Ino “pretty baby”

- Nanami is like ino’s babysitter the whole time

8.5/10 two man

Yuji and Megumi

- Yuji is all over his s/o. Nuzzling his face in their neck or hair, (depending on how tall they are), kissing their forehead, cheek, and nose, fingers interlaced, hugging them from behind.

-Megumi keeps it more..modest? Private? He interlocks pinkies with his s/o and when they’re not around anyone kisses them on the cheek.

- Yuji is trying his absolute best to make his s/o laugh with corny jokes and Megumi is just naturally funny with his sarcasm.

- Yuji loves the idea of matching pjs. All together as a group. Megumi will only match with his s/o. End of discussion.

- Megumi will only do certain things for his s/o and his s/o only. Like sharing food, drinks, and buying stuff for them.

- I love this two man 10/10 idc

Yuta and Inumaki

- rika makes yuta social distance from his s/o💀

- Inumaki is making fun of goofy looking people via text to his s/o

- yuta eventually gets rika to calm down and is unintentionally all over his s/o

-Inumaki is purposefully all over his s/o

- yuta - “love”

- Inumaki is so funny over text. Yuta is holding hands and sharing a milkshake with his s/o looking at them lovingly while Inumaki and his s/o are DYING right next to them clutching their stomaches in laughter while making fun of people over text.

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I ran out of duos I fear.

Tags

#two man #duos #jjk inumaki #jjk megumi #jjk shiu #jjk toji #jjk gojo #jjk geto #sugusato #jjk fluff #jjk headcanons #jjk imagines #jujustsu kaisen x reader #i love you #justasecretflower

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soupy-hotel · 1 month ago

Note

I mean this in the nicest way possible but based on the way your farts sound, I just know you have a fat ass! There’s no denying it! The way they have to travel through your cheeks and bubble out is just something else! I just would love to show my entire face in, cheeks on each side, nose directly on hole. 🍑💨🖤

i can't deny it, i do have a fat ass ! and thank you for appreciating my farts enough to identify that

#ill answers #girl fart #gassy girl #eproctophilia #eprocto #farts #girl farts

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 1 year ago

Text

Rendezvous

Epilogue for Sweet Treats AU: by character | chronological | epilogues

Warnings: these drabbles will include dark elements such as noncon, control, intimidation, and other stuff that may not be specified. Take this as you chance to scroll by.

Note: yall wanted this man.

Please let me know what you think <3

🍑🍑🍑

“I’m gonna get in so much trouble,” you squeal as you dip into the backseat, the door shutting heavily against your leg.

“Screw em, baby cakes,” Lloyd sneers as he pulls you towards him, “why do they care so much?”

You don’t have a chance to answer him as his lips meet yours. You giggle as his mustache tickles and you grasp the collar of his striped yellow shirt. His hand slips around your neck and locks you against him. The butterflies fluttering in your stomach take you back to the first time he kissed you. Right behind the cafe.

He unzips your jacket and slides it down your arms. He lets it fall to the floor as his hand snakes around the back of your head once more.

You part, just enough to catch your breath. He’s close in the cramped space, his fingers curling wantingly against your nape. The car is running, the heater warming the air.

“They’re just looking out for me,” you murmur, “that’s all.”

“Don’t worry about them, babe,” his other hand crawls up your side, slowly raising your shirt, “I’ll take care of you… look out for you.”

He kisses along your cheek as shivers ripple over your body. The guilt slakes away beneath his touch. You shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be fooling around with anyone, but you’re so lonely. And Lloyd’s never reprimanded you, not like everyone else.

You sigh his name as his hand slips beneath the fabric of your shirt. He growls as he pecks along your jawline, leaning you back against the door. Your heart hammers with nervous excitement. You catch his thick fingers as he gropes your chest.

“Please, I can’t–”

“It hurts so bad,” he babbles against your throat, “please, baby, you’re making me hurt.”

“I know, I just– my ex…”

“I’m not your ex, am I?” He snarls as he nips you lightly, “hmm? I see what you are, baby face. The sexiest…” another kiss along your neck, “most adorable…” another, “irresistible woman I’ve ever met.”

You nearly swoon as his heat swallows you up. His lips reach your collarbone and he squeezes your tit, even as you hold him back.

“You mean it?” You ask as your self-control dwindles, “do you really mean it?”

“I do, cupcake, I swear,” He brings his hand down from your neck and takes yours. He guides it down to the front of his pants and he moans. His tone is laced with agony as he wriggles. “Please…”

You hum and nod, pushing his hand firmer against your chest. “Be gentle,” you plea.

“Yeah, baby, yeah, I’ll try.”

He pulls you against him, sliding you down onto the seat beneath him. He covers you with his body, his knees between yours as he kisses you desperately. He rolls his hips, grinding into you desperately as his breaths grow shallow.

He rolls your shirt up all the way and frees your tits over the band of your bra. You let out a squeak as he toys with your nipple between his teeth, his tongue swirling around the tip as he hums. You brace the back of his head, the close shave smooth against your palm.

His hand trails down your stomach and he slides his fingers beneath your pants. You tremble and moan as he feels along your pelvis and finds the patch of hair, delving further to your clit. You swallow back the memory of another’s touch, this is nicer than that.

“Fuck, you’re so good,” Lloyd nips your breast between words, “I bet you got the prettiest little pussy.”

You giggle and writhe against his touch. He plays with you cloyingly, your cunt slick and clenching.

“You know it is, you naughty girl,” he tease as he sits up, slowly dragging his hand free, “that’s why you’re laughing.”

He grips the top of your pants and yanks them down. He jolts your body as he does and you exclaim in surprise. He pushes your legs together straight and rests them against his torso, your feet above his shoulder. He shoves his hand against your cunt once more, his other fighting with his fly.

He looks down as he pulls his dick out, rubbing his tip against your cunt. He purrs again as he leans into you. Just a little, just until you moan.

“You do got a pretty pussy,” he praises as he eases in another inch, “even prettier with me inside you.”

He tilts his hips as your walls twitch around his intrusion. He urges his length deeper and deeper until you think you can’t take anymore. You reach down and press your fingertips against his thigh.

“Too much?” He asks with a wink.

“Just… been a while,” you murmur.

“Yeah?” He stretches his free arm down and slaps your ass, “or maybe that jackass was lacking, huh?”

He tickles the back of your thigh and forces his fingers between your legs. He pushes against your clit and you wiggle at the new pressure. He bucks his hips sharply and you squeal as he bottoms out.

“Ow, Lloyd, slow…” you grunt as your fingertips slip down to his knee.

“I’ve taken it slow,” he snarls and thrusts again, harder even than before, rubbing you as he builds a steady motion, “I want all of you, baby, all…” He snaps his pelvis again, “of” again, “you.”

#lloyd hansen #dark lloyd hansen #dark!lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x reader #lloyd hansen x birdy #dark!fic #drabble #drabble series #au #series #sweet treats #the gray man

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ladylooch · 6 months ago

Note

So nico and lexi both have great asses…. 🤔🤔

I can picture either lexi slapping nicos phat ass as payback or her catching nico ogling her 🍑 before they even started dating … hehehehe

This one made me giggle 🤭

On a Wednesday morning, Nico yawns loudly in the elevator. It was a late night. He doesn’t actually have a team obligation this early after a late night game, but he wants to catch Lexi on her way to the gym. She mentioned on Monday that she had today off and would be going to the gym in the morning. Lexi sticks to her routine which makes it easy for Nico to stalk see her.

Nico watches the number of the elevator drop until the elevator stops at her floor. He grins briefly, then purposefully forces his face back to natural. The doors slide open and there she is. On her body are tight lavender leggings along with a white sweatshirt with a navy blue Colorado across the chest. He hair is in a high pony tail, the ends curled like she spent all morning on them.

“Hey Nico.” Lexi grins.

“Hi Lexi.” He responds, giving her a polite nod. She stands in front of him as Nico tucks himself further in the left corner to lean against. “Going to pilates?”

“Yeah. I have been skipping the last few weeks and need to get back into my routine.”

“Wish I could skip a work out.”

“It’s kind of your job.”

“True, but it doesn’t mean I always like it.”

“I’m sure.” She nods, then looks forward as the elevator starts moving.

Nico puts his eyes on the toes of his Nikes, examining the black leather while he tries to think of what to say next. His eyes move over to her pink Adidas, then trail up her calves to the swell of her ass in her tight leggings. He stokes his brown orbs over the curve of her backside, wanting to feel the bulk of it resting in his hands or on his tightening zipper. He would kneed his fingers into her soft flesh, helping her match a tempo as she works herself up and down on his dic—

“Nico?”

“Hm?” He asks, moving his eyes from her ass to the back of her head.

“You know I can see you, right?” Nico pauses, then slides his eyes to meet his own guilty ones in the reflection off the door. Fuck. A smirk tilts a corner of her lips up as red spreads across Nico’s neck into his cheeks. “Pilates working for me?”

“Ah… yeah. Keep it up.” Nico laughs awkwardly. Lexi laughs too, eyes glittering back at him in the gold doors. Silence passes over them until, “I’m sorry.” Nico blurts out. “That was out of line.”

The doors open. Lexi steps out first with Nico trailing slightly behind. She heads towards the main entrance then casually says over her shoulder.

“It’s okay to look, Nico. If I didn’t want you to, I wouldn’t wear these on days I know I’m gonna see you.”

Then she exits the building, leaving Nico grinning while watching the sway of her ass that he’s pretty sure she’s doing just for him.

#what my world spins around au

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freshlyrage · 10 months ago

Text

Running Like Water

Chapter 21

pairing: Javier Peña x OFC (written as xReader)

fic warnings: NSFW Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI) language, strained family relationships, mentions of drug abuse, discussions of insecurities and body image issues, daddy and mommy issues

fic tags: Best friends younger sister, Life-long crush, Friends to lovers, Unrequited love, slow burn, Push and Pull, Small Town Dynamics, Secret Relationships, latina MC, Fluff and Angst, OFC!Jessica Alba face claim, sorry Lorraine I’m bringing you into this, Time jumps, 2 year age gap, pre-canon

word count: 9.4k

a/n: Whoa haven't seen you guys since last year... LOL. This is very angst filled, sadly its our last vacation chapter. Back to reality but Javier and Andrea try some new... stuff... this chapter 🍑. If it isn't your thing thats okay!

But (no pun intended) on a less sexy note, Andrea meets some family this chapter.

Sorry for the wait was busy this month having a winter break fling (that's so like me) but back to reality.

Thank you for being so patient with me always.

This is for @angelofsmalldeath-codeine

The two of you leave the studio shortly after Edmond threatened to wring Javier’s neck for the first date joke, well it is our first date. Before that though you were honestly eager to get out of the place, you needed him back in the hotel room, you needed to thank him with your mouth, with the warmth pooling on the tiny thong under your skirt. While Javi explains to Edmond that you are indeed the girl he had vented about when they first met, usually this would have made you a blushing mess but you were practically squirming in the stool. Your earrings catching the light casting a red reflection against the wall. Your eyes follow the light around the room as the two spoke, your mind drifting in places that could only be described as filthy. Edmond jokes that it had all worked out in the end, it took you a moment to catch up with their jokes. You had disassociated but Javier picked up on it and ushered the two of you out of the studio and back out into the Louisiana heat.

“I have dinner reservations so behave.” He whispers before grabbing your hand in a sweet possessive hold. Your brows quirk slightly before leaning into him completely. He seemed to be hyper focused on getting the two of you to the proper place at the right time because his eyes went all squinted while he walked you through the busy sidewalks.

“I am behaving.” You were, sure, maybe it was a bit rude of you to look around the room aimlessly while Javier caught up with his old pal, but you truly didn't mean to. There was something about girls like you, girls who craved to be wanted–once you get a taste–insatiable is the only word to describe you. So insatiable that you couldnt give a fuck about a dinner date with Javier Peña, it was so like you. So like you to feel so overwhelmed with love, a feeling so foreign, so strong that now you can't think of anything else but the thought of him inside of you. Good lord you were soaking.

His cheeks were still red, either from tears or the high sun. Regardless he looks down at you with a teasing smirk that quickly hardens and turns into a disapproving head shake. “I saw you out of the corner of my eye, querida. Wiggling around in that stool.” He says in hush tones, you break eye contact in slight embarrassment. You know that annoys him, when you shy away because you feel his body stiffen. Poor Javi, you think. One day he’ll understand you fully, he knows you better than anyone else but he still isn't used to your self-destructive tendencies of self-manipulation and constantly wondering whether he truly likes you. And despite today being the greatest testament of his devotion for you there was still that part of you that was a girl without a father. How humiliating? You also know he is never truly upset with you, even when he stands up straight and huffs a breath, it's always followed by silence, his space to try to figure you out.

There's a lot to learn, six years apart is too much for anyone. You've become four different people in these six years.

By the time the two of you entered the warmly lit restaurant you've given your brain some time to think of meeting your grandmother tomorrow, now thats a thought to have you quit squirming. The desire you felt so heavily only half an hour before left in an instant at the thought of what's to come tomorrow. As you settle in your seat the thought of your father not being alive crosses your mind, instinctively you touch the bee earrings softly.

You feel Javi watching you with intent, a small frown on his lips as he adjusts his belt buckle while he sits. If your stomach wasn't doing turns from impending doom you would have made a big dick joke, you suddenly didn’t have it in you. You quit touching the earrings and let out a shaky breath before grabbing the menu.

“What’s wrong Andrea?” He asks, stern, almost like it's a statement. Like nothing is not an answer he’ll accept. He knows something is wrong.

“I’m really nervous for tomorrow.” You admit without any tooth pulling. Uncrossing your legs beneath the table, Javi nods firmly he knew how to react to you when you admitted things like this. There's nothing you hated more than someone screwing their brows in concern and pity, he never did that. He just nodded, solid, dependable and able to listen. He doesn't respond so you continue. Brushing a piece of hair from your face you sip the water given. “I also don’t want this weekend to end. I don’t want to go back. I especially don’t want to go back if tomorrow goes bad, I don’t have it in me to explain that to my mother.” There it was, that other part. The sheer embarrassment that could be awaiting you, the possibility of being humiliated by your paternal family and coming home to a mother that will look at your tear stained cheeks and say, I told you so.

Javi clenches his jaw at the slight shake in your voice, and it’s so like him. He puts his large hand palm up at the small table between you two. Your heart grows in your chest and without hesitation you place your own small hand over his. Manicured nails circling the dry lines there, his thumb rises and wedges between two fingers tickling you a spot you never knew tickled. You choke out a giggle and dug your nails into his palm, he winces in fake pain. Ow, he grumbles. You take his hand entirely and lifts it to your face, pressing a kiss to his palm. He smiles, his dimples deepening and his eyes crinkling. “Sorry.” You say and kiss his palm again, “Sorry for attacking you with my nails even though you’ve made me the happiest girl in the world today.”

He shakes his head in a shy little act, wow, you wanted to jump his bones again. “It’s okay I like it when you’re rough.”

“Oh shut up.” You laugh, pressing his palm to your cheek before placing it back down on the table. “And I’m sorry for ruining the mood with my sulking.”

“Don’t apologize to me.” Javier furrowed his brow in disapproval, “If tomorrow doesn’t go the way you plan I’ll extend our weekend, give you time to recover here. Don’t care if it’ll be obvious to everyone that we’re together, we’ll figure it out.”

Your lips quirk in a satisfied smile, you’ll take it. You were minutes away from suggesting the two of you stay in New Orleans until the damn wedding Saturday. The two of you were so in love it was hard to be logical. Hiding your face a smidge as you lift the menu to cover your crimson cheeks. “Okay, that's fine with me.”

“God I wish I knew she was that mean to you–I’m like regretting being her friend a little bit.” You were slurping down pasta with a frown, hearing stories from high school about Lorraine. The more he uncovered, the more you regret giving her grace. Every new piece of information was followed with Javier’s attempt to excuse it. You suppose the both of you have some things to learn, you wanted to tell him that her actions and his faults were not in the slightest bit comparable. Like;

On valentine's day she got drunk and purposefully poured wine on my favorite sweater in front of all my friends. But she was mad because I skipped sunday mass with her family the week before.

Or,

I was really upset with her cheating, but she blamed it on the time I called you pretty in front of her. I guess to her that was emotionally cheating.

You sat in front of him with your mouth agape, or you cursed under your breath before shutting yourself up with carbs. “None of that is normal, you shouldn't make excuses for that sort of behavior. I doubt she does when she complains about you to other people.” You say while dabbing the corners of your lips free of marinara.

He laughs and nods in agreement, “You're right, I want to be the bigger person though. No need to be upset on my behalf querida.”

The 2nd glass of wine gets to you slightly as you roll your eyes aggressively, feeling awfully protective of your boyfriend. You remember which sweater it was, it was the white knitted one he wore to his last christmas at home, he would wear that thing to every holiday. “Whatever, god forbid I feel defensive over my man.” You whisper and bring your glass to your tinted lips. Javier’s lips quirk at its corners, you know he loved hearing that come from your mouth. You noticed it just thirty minutes prior when you told the waiter, my boyfriend would like the same. You picked up on the way he shifted in his seat when you called him baby. For the past 10 minutes you had been slipping the pet names slowly and scattered, he was getting worked up. Look who needs to behave now.

“Hmm.” He huffs, annoyed, turned on, grumpy and everything else.

You bite back a tipsy smile, slipping your pointed heel up his calf slowly, until the outsole skated his inner thigh. He shakes his head and looks to you through a half lidded gaze. “Relax.” His voice deep and striking, loud enough for the other patrons to hear. You nod in agreement and attempt to move your foot back down but before you could make the effort his hand falls between his spread legs and holds your delicate foot in place on his lap. Your breath hitches in your throat, your leg pulled so still your skirt rides up. Saving yourself from the breeze, your left leg tightens to cover the soaked fabric now exposed.

With his right hand holding your heeled foot and his left hand on the table, he grabs his glass and continues at his drink. Your breath is hitched in your throat, you feel his stare. His eyes glued to your chest, your nipples pebbled under the fabric. You don’t listen to his demand, incorrigibly you lean forward releasing some tension with the press of your legs and the hip movement required for you to move closer. “Why are you being so mean?”

His eyes narrow, “Mean? A weekend getaway, museum date and those pretty earrings.” He teases and you nearly laugh, nearly, truthfully you were so turned on you couldn’t care to play these games. You’ve had years to do that. You survey the restaurant, there had only been about ten tables and each paired with a couple or a group of men in suits. Your eyes dart to the family bathroom, Javier follows your line of sight with a smirk. No families, you note. Less guilt for what you’re about to do.

You drop your heel from his hold and wipe the corners of your mouth, “Well, you’ve spoiled me Javi.” You shrug, adjusting your small cardigan to cover your pointed nipples. He laughs a hearty chuckle. Your face falls to straight seriousness, hair readjusted. His nostrils flare at your hardened look.

“Rotten.”

Your eyes shrink with a slight hint of petulance. Like a little girl not getting her way, absolutely not. Eyes scanning the room once more, “Well if you’ll excuse me. I’m going to take care of myself in the bathroom.” You huff before rising to your feet. Feeling the table to your right shooting a glance at your figure. With a strut of false confidence, your knees were buckling with fear he won’t follow you and just think you’re upset with him. It’s the last message you want to get across after he poured his aching soul to you at the gallery.

Javier watches you walk to the bathroom and close the door behind you. Well he watches to make sure no one else was watching because the pencil skirt you decided to wear curved perfectly below your ass, making it apparent to everyone that your behind was a tight little thing. Rolling his tongue against his cheek he waits a few seconds before pinching the bridge of his nose.

He knows you, he knows you’ve been pent up since the gallery, since he put those earrings on you. How could he not know, you practically screwed your brows in bliss every time he took a look at you. Truthfully on their walk to the restaurant he was still reeling from the entire first date thing, he had never lost his composure like that—to cry in front of someone— to cry in front of you. He’d be a lying dog if it didn’t scare the living shit out of him. So scared that he nearly thought about just saying fuck it and getting down on one knee and proposing to you with some fucking earrings.

He knew it before. He knows it now that what you too have is forever, beyond time and circumstance, there was no way you two could live a life with other people. What a discovery to make on a first date.

Anyway those feelings of sheer terror and love, they’re the same in his head, were quickly replaced with every tiny possessive nickname you let leave your red bitten lips. He was fully hard by the time you decided to play footsie with him, he wondered if you felt the strain against his pants through your heels. He decided he was going to fuck you into the mattress when the two of you got back to the hotel but he supposes you had different plans.

His eyes glued to his glass he picks it up and downs it. “Fuck it.” He murmurs before wiping his mustache, adjusting his shirt and heading for a straight bee line for the bathroom.

You smile softly at him through the mirror, “I was starting to think you didn’t get the memo.” Javi nods, his mind set. Silent and brooding behind you. Your confidence seemed to have faded with each passing minute he contemplated whether to follow you or not. “I was afraid you thought I was really upset-Oh Javi.” You shriek the second he tosses your skirt over your ass. Instinctually bending a bit over the sink. Dropping to his knees, his dirty thoughts win as he slightly sinks his teeth into your tan behind. You giggle at the absurdity of it all, but he doesn’t care what it would look like to anyone else. He was a man utterly in love with his girlfriend, and with how soft her ass was.

Javier kisses each cheek of hers and laces each kiss with a bite then a firm tug. Kneading and kisses, his large palms have finally found something that he didn’t completely engulf. Why was it so sexy when his hand covered your entire breast yet even sexier that your ass finally dwarfs him? He’s never been a man above worship, above religion, still he had never believed in a god so clear, so real until he came home and had you. Was it normal to be this enthralled by a partner? Was it just the honeymoon? He really couldn't care anymore about those questions because god, Andrea, he murmurs like a prayer.

With your skirt piled at your hips, the tiny little red thong was fair game for his needy kisses. His teeth graze the string that just barely covered the one part of you that’s untouched, you buck as his fingers spread you open, the loose string falling to the side to expose you there. “Anyone ever touch you here?” He asks with his left hand holding you open, and his right thumb skimming so close. He knows the answer. He wants to hear it. You screw your eyes shut, a small whimper escapes your parted lip. Your heels slip on the tile, he lets up his left hand to hold you steady.

Tossing your hair over one shoulder and attempting to look back at him you whisper, “Never—I want to try but-”

But I’m not sure I want that sort of first time to be in a restaurant bathroom. You think.

He knows exactly what you mean, he knows how delicate this part of sex could be, he knew it's a lot more than a heat of the moment decision. He’d never, not in a place like this. Though, he had other ideas, “Another time, can I taste you here at least.” He taps at your cunt and you eagerly reach behind and slide your panties to the side. Javi smiles when he’s met with his girlfriend’s swollen cunt just for him. Good lord, he did not want to think about having to sneak around again. For the two of you to be limited beyond your control the second you step home. He wondered why he couldn’t just rent a home out here just for the two of you, just until he leaves. Will they be reduced once again to just twice a week, all pent up and hand-covering mouth sex in his bed. He tried not to think, tried.

One thing the two of you have grown fond of is him eating you out from behind. This position was just like the second time, in his room on memorial day. You look over your shoulder, the cardigan slipped low to expose the tan shoulder of yours. With lidded eyes you stare into Javier’s soul as you reach your hand between his face and your bent form. With a shy blush your delicate fingers run across the seam of your cunt and slowly up to skim the tight hole that's been the object of Javier’s deepest fantasies.

“You can taste here too.” You quip, you weren’t sure if people even did that. You could be making a fool out of yourself but you knew after his fingers got close to your asshole, you felt a new pit in your belly. Javier’s eyes raised and he suddenly felt like a kid in a candy store. Never in a million years did he ever imagine a world where you agreed to something like this. He mumbles deeply, Jesus Christ. You didn’t have to tell him twice.

He plunged his face into your cunt first, quicker and less teasing this time, they were in a public bathroom for crying out loud. His licks and sucks are wet and aggressive. His head shaking in between. You drop your head into your chest and the slow build of release. If he kept up this pace you’ll be writhing in climax in thirty more seconds. You're not sure you were ready for the moment he proceeds to eat you out just there. For a moment you wonder if this is really something people do during sex, you’ve had girl friends who have tried anal but none of them ever mentioned their boyfriends eating them out there. You wonder if you're the first people to ever do this- or it’ll feel good at all. You surely weren’t ready, the second his heavy tongue slid up to your place untouched, and you weren’t expecting such a feeling.

You shrieked loud enough for the guests to hear. Javier’s heart sank and paused for a second while you covered your mouth.

“I’m sorry-I’m sorry.”

Javier’s brows tensed, “Is it too much?” He asks lowly, looking up at the back of your head. You screw your eyes shut, and nod.

“No-I just didn’t expect for it to feel so good.” You whisper as if to do damage control for the shriek you let out, with your head dropped in shame you feel his chuckle between your cheeks. Okay, he laughs and continues again. You’re more prepared this time–yeah you two definitely aren't the firsts to discover eating ass. This has got to be popular.

His head moving skillfully, his chin skimming your cunt along with it. Shaking his head and devouring you whole. And oh, it was a feeling so good you were afraid to know what it would feel like if he applied more pressure than a tongue back there. You never saw the appeal in anything to do with anal—suddenly—you suppose it takes the right person. You always told yourself you’d never try any of that unless you were married or something— well close enough. Your knuckles go white gripping the porcelain tops. He parts for a second and spits directly on your ass, parting you to watch it slide down onto your cunt.

“You like being a dirty girl? Yeah, Andrea?” he gets close again to clean up his mess and good gracious you were close. “Letting me eat your ass like this? Used to think you were so shy—now look at what you’re letting me do to you.” He dives in again, this time reaching his entire body leans with it. His hands gripping the tops of your thighs while he moves from your cunt to your ass and back-and back again.

Your forehead presses against the mirror and you catch your own eyes for a moment and you’re absolutely disgusted by the sight. Disgusted in the best way possible. You are filthy, you love it—you loved this. You bend further to give him better access to your clit and you’re a goner. Your ears ring and you fall limp but like always he never lets you fall. He’s at his feet again, pressing your knees together. He unbuckles himself and relieves his aching cock from their confinement. You open your mouth to tell him to put it in but he speaks first.

“I’m gonna come, just let me—fuck.” He grabs himself and fists himself over your bent body. “Let me fuck your thighs really quick—please princesa, let me—” He grits and you bite your lips at the thought. Your heart skips a beat or a few, so many firsts. Why is the thought so enticing?

Okay—please, you murmur and without hesitation he drags his cock between your folds, collecting slip before thrusting. He wipes his eye as an attempt to readjust his blurry mind. The post orgasm clarity will hit him soon, it didn’t matter now he was too pent up to care. He humps you from behind, his length squeezed by your thighs and his tip nudging your overstimulated clit. There was something depraved about the action, being used in this way. Being used and loving the way it feels.

And he’s driving fast, pre-cum spreading at the tops of your thighs. How he made sex so enjoyable was beyond you, all you could do is softly sigh and moan, nearly drooling from your mouth falling open. “Javi please– I-” Perhaps your moans were a bit too loud because his hand snakes up to your mouth, effectively muzzling you. You babble incoherent begs and moans into his dry palm, while his other hand death gripped your hips for stability. It didn’t take many thrusts for you to be coming again, his hand on your hip quickly snaked to hold your thighs tighter against him and with that he finished over the tops of your thighs, painting you perfectly. His own little art piece.

There’s a ringing silence for a moment as he slips out from behind you. You catch your breath, wiping your tears away. Head heavy, too frazzled to adjust to the situation. Javier just ate your ass out in a restaurant bathroom and fucked your thighs. And you came twice in ten minutes. Jesus take the fucking wheel.

“I-I’m sorry I’ve never done anything like that before.” You almost expect for those words to come from your mouth but it aches all the same coming from his. You turn around to him, knowing the sight is probably ridiculous, tear stained cheeks, a wrap skirt hiked up your legs and his come spread at the tops of your thighs.

Your eyes soften watching him fumble to tuck himself away. You could see his jaw clenched, you knew when his mind was on overdrive. This is one of those moments. Like he’s drafting ways to apologize to you.

“I liked it.” You admit in a whisper.

His brows shoot up and he looks up to you. The color in his face returning, as he fastened his belt. “You did?”

You blush, your eyes falling to your thighs. “I did, we should try more stuff like that… it was… really hot.” You admit, looking up at him through your brow bone. His nostrils flare and he’s nodding.

“Okay.” He nods sternly in the same old grumpy Javi way.

Your lips twist at the silliness of it all. “Okay…”

“Alright.” He’s still staring at your thighs.

You giggle, “Jesus christ Javi! Clean me up!”

He jumps in place, “Right sorry.”

It’s safe to say that the two of you were quite full after the whole restaurant debacle. Frankly your last night should’ve been filled with endless love making but Javier could sense your nerves. After tipsy kisses and stumbling into the room the reality began to set in. You struggled to sleep that night, afraid of waking up to a packed room and a car ride to your grandmother's home. He slipped into the shower with you without any advances, you wouldn't mind it all but he reads you, he washes you without lingering touches and only a few kisses. The two of you find a rhythm, drying off, getting into his shirt and some panties. The two of you exchange stories before bed, who knew he was such a softy like you.

“I’m always nervous before meeting old people.” You admit. Its a stupid quirk of yours but man do the elderly intimidate you. You chose teaching because you knew that dealing with the elderly would be far from that area. “They can be so judgemental and old fashioned, its painful– every conversation.”

Javier strokes his hand against your arm, “You're rambling. It's time for bed baby.”

He was right, you had no need to bring that up, you just really didn't want the day to end. Why is that you were so afraid of the thing you yearned for your entire life?

The morning is quiet and gloomy, it rained the entire night so the sky was all gray clouds with peaking sun. The entire room was packed by the time you sat up to rub your eyes. Your stomach is so uneasy you could only take four bites of the waffles he called in for you, no syrup, just butter and powdered sugar how you like it. He’s quiet too as he folds your clothes. You check out at twelve and load his car again. He kisses your temple before opening the car door for you. You nod a silent thanks before you settle into the car seat. Head leaned against the window. Reaching into the dash board for the map, finger tracing until it stops at the road circled labeled, Andrea’s Grandma, you smile to yourself thinking about Javier at his desk circling and routing a way to her grandmother's home the night before their trip.

With fear of rejection you fiddle with the bee earrings in your ears, grounding yourself with the reminder of Javier even when he's right next to you.

The home was fairly close, only an hour away from the hotel. Javi smokes two cigarettes with the low sound of the road below the tires and slow soul music filling the car. It was then when you realized Javier was nervous too. You think of what he told you at La Belle Forme, about his panic attack. It was rare for silence to exist between them not like this. You kiss his knuckles, a few kisses, you suppose you found solace in comforting him.

When the car slowed down you weren't expecting to be approached with large estates with rolling grass and bald cypress trees casting down like curtains. When Lorena called you pictured an elderly woman in a small home, you never envisioned a large white home attached to other small homes. You looked down at the map. 4289 Coventy Court, “Its the small house, the big one is 4287.” You point, it all seemed to be on the same estate though, you'll still have to walk through this strangers beautiful front lawn in order to get to your grandmothers. Javi nods, shutting the car off. Your hands drop to play with the ripped ends of the map.

His palm comes over to your lap and grabs at your fidgeting hands, his hands always cold and dry and large. “¿Estás segura de que estás lista?” He asks so softly, he did that often, reassuring you in spanish. You inhale deeply, looking at your connected hands and then to the house peeking behind the large trees. You nod.

And there it is, right In front of you— a physical manifestation of the answers you’ve prayed to hear. Everything you've ever wanted to know. It could split you completely, could kill you, but it could free you. A small part of you hopes it splits your heart in two so that you're prepared for heartache in November at the hands of the DEA. Who knew Javier could hurt you more than your father? When did you give him that power, you suppose it’s when you realized it was love.

The two of you climb out of the truck and make your way through the cobblestone path, “I’m not going to get shot out here right?” Javi whispers and you cant even itch out a giggle from the coil of nerves in your chest, he doesn’t joke anymore. He trails behind you while you lead the way, like you know where to go— you haven’t had a fucking clue. With every tap of your sneakers on the ground you felt panic rise higher in your throat.

You could feel Javier behind you, keeping his steps slower than your own. Giving you space you weren’t sure you wanted. You appreciated it nonetheless. Like he was ready to run and get the car if anything hurts you. He’s 3 steps behind you once you close your eyes shut before knocking on the light blue door. Your eyes surveying the plants lining the white porch. “¡entra!” A distant voice calls from beyond the door and its the same voice from the phone. Something in you bursts, your eyes dart to Javier in fit of panic. Fuck it. You open the door to the home.

The astounding amount of pastels blind you. An entire rolling carpet of white at your feet, Javier holds his arm out before you nervously put your outside shoes inside this museum piece of a home. You saw her too, out of the corner of your eye. Sat in a wheelchair with hair pressed straight down to her hips, with a book in her lap – the sound of birds chirping splitting your ears as you unlace your shoes with shaky hands. Javier seemed to have slipped his shoes in record time because his socked foot took a step inside before he bent down again to grab your shoes and tossed them outside.

Standing up straight the woman in front of you widens her eyes at the sight of you, her smile splitting her face in two and you arent sure if anyone had ever looked at you with such melancholy before. She was a beautiful woman, well kept from what you can see it seemed like she had a lot of help. For once in your life you feel strong, chin up and nearly smiling. Lorena fully smiles and there it is–You can finally pin point where your bright grin comes from. "Ven aquí! Get over here before I try to walk to you!." She shouts with that same accent you remember over the phone and with that you're padding over to your grandmother. Embracing her for the first time. Receiving kisses to the side of your head, and caresses and you don’t feel sad anymore–or nervous. You sat in front of her and Javier stayed in his lane, quiet and observing. His hand on your while she explained how she found your number.

“My greatest friend Griselda moved to Laredo about a year ago. I had been pushing the poor woman to look through the phonebook for your name– I didn't know if you had our last name or hers. Whatever I found it and tried calling but your mother– you already know.”

You sure did, the conversation was what you expected it to be. She attempts to understand what your life has been like this whole time. You tell her your mother owned a boutique and that your brother was on his last week of being a bachelor, she teared up at that. You almost forgot she was around when your brother was just two years old, she laughs when explaining his biting problem. Her eyes fall between the two of you a few times, you and Javier and your joined hands. The way his were in your lap and how your nail grazed the strong tendons of your lovers hands. She kept the questions Andrea central.

Did you end up going to college?

Yes, University of Miami. I’m a middle school teacher.

She laughs and claps her hands together, she tells you taught for thirty six years. Your heart nearly bursts in your chest.

So are you living at home?

For now, yes. I’m looking to move soon.

Do you like your brother's wife to be?

Oh–yeah. She’s been my close friend since I was in middle school.

She nods, turning to her left to grab her cup of tea. There had been two cups left out. She let you in on how she kept the place so tidy, her home nurse Ms. Cristina, who worked for her every day. She points to her bird cage at the corner of the living room which shows the only non-tidy part of the house full of bird seeds on the floor, They also take of me.

“And this–.” She smiled, waving her finger in between you two. “How did you two meet.”

“Oh!” You laugh, Javier cracks a smile. “We-”

“Uh-No. I want to hear his story. Ha estado sentado ahí en completo silencio, habla, hijo.” She cuts you off in the only way elderly people know how, gracefully and silly all at once. Your cheeks burn red. Absolutely intrigued to hear his explanation. His face softens for a moment before he breaks into a deep chuckle. Rubbing his eye in that same nervous tick that he always does.

“Oh–We were just kids when we met.” He was instantly interrupted by a yelp from your grandmother.

“¡Ay, por Dios! Qué romántico. So you two have been together since then?” Perhaps it was rude but immediately you and Javier look at each other and let out a cackle in unison. Leaning into his shoulder as you giggle while your grandma sits confused, wondering what was so funny about her question. “What-What’s so funny?” She says with a hint of humor in her own tone.

Javier shakes his head and replies, “It took us close to a decade to get here.” His eyes flash to yours, soft and gleaming. He looks at you like this often—always, but there’s a different look, something close to pride. Truthfully, he was overjoyed to talk about you to someone, especially to someone who by some crazy phone call and last minute trip—is your family.

Lorena smiles, sipping her tea with a nod. Her eyes floating to something behind you, above your head. You don’t turn to see what has made her eyes misty and youthful for a moment. “Ah.. one of those. I’m familiar, promise you. What is it that you do Javier?”

He straightens up at the question like it shattered the small world he’s created with you. “I’m a DEA agent, I’m assigned in Colombia starting this November.” It was firm, devoid of laughter and pride. Like a soldier being questioned about deployment. Your grandmothers brows screw in sympathy the second he mentions being away, her eyes falling to your own. You tried to be strong but the reminder chips away at your spirit each time. Five months away. Your eyes drop to your knees.

“Ah… I see.” Softly she points her chin high, a necklace falling out of her cashmere sweater with the movement. She nudges behind you, where her eyes fell previously, you and Javier turn slightly. The image of a man in black and white, eyes light and a stern look. Clad in military attire, and a nose so similar to your own. You into the eyes of your grandfather for the first time. How could you have forgotten? You haven't even asked about him, his name–anything. You notice then that the entire hour you have spent in your grandmother's home you hadn't once thought of your father. Something about the eyes in the photo seared you, What if my fathers dead? “Your grandfather was also named Lucas. He was my high school sweetheart but we broke up after he decided to leave me for the war. Listen, I respect our military but–not for him–absolutely not. He was always leaving, estúpido, estúpido. We split when he was apart, it wasn't very easy to be in contact like it is now. But… I didn't wait, I found someone else but mija… the second he stepped foot on american soil we were married and I was pregnant with your father 3 years later.”

Javier placed his hand on your lower back at some point during her story, thumb softly rubbing into your thin t-shirt. Your eyes threatened to betray you. You know why she chooses to tell you this story, you suppose this sort of thing runs in the family. Leaving and watching the ones who leave. “He died before me, that absolute idiot.” She sniffles and shakes her head. You turn back around, facing her–she had already wiped her tears away. And she does it just like you, palm first and hurried. Who knew the sight of your grandmother crying could fill you with such warmth, you suppose you were never emotional in the same way your mother was. You wondered where it came from, you guess you can say you've got it from your grandmother.

“Oh, I'm so sorry.” You choke on your own words and she waves her hand in a its alright but it isn't motion. She grabs her teacup once more, her eyes stuck to yours until her brows shoot up in shock.

“Oh–your father. It's so like me to get wrapped up in myself, I’m sure you have a million questions. I can settle your nerves and tell you that he is very much alive.” She laughs, she really was a kookie old lady. “He also knows that you’re here.”

“What?” You and Javier blurt simultaneously, the two of you leaning in on your knees. For a split second your cheeks heat at the thought of Javier being this invested but that completely flies out the window while your grandmother nods with a smile.

“This is his estate, you think a school teacher could afford all this? His home was the big one right next door. He’s nervous but he is expecting you. I thought I’d give him time to… speak for himself.” She nods and settles her cup down once more. “I’m not trying to kick you out but he’s probably bouncing his knee for the thousandth time over there”

“You’ve gone non-verbal Andrea.” The two of you kissed your grandmother goodbye with promises of a second visit in the next few months, Javier was micro analyzing your every move. How after the bomb was dropped you had frozen in fear and only muttered 4 more words. Her brows furrowed as the two of them approached the back door of her fathers home. Javier knew what this meant, what this all means. He sees what its doing inside of you, your body is rejecting the truth that, A. your father is alive and B. He seems to be doing quite well for himself. Your grandmother gave the two of you instructions like you were on a secret mission.

Go through the back door

Javi, it's best you wait in the hall.

He will most likely be sat in his office, first door on your right.

You just nodded with a knot in your throat. Javier watches you lead the way in silence and it's killing him to know how much this is taking a toll on you already.

You have eaten in on yourself already, absent in the eyes.

He remembered fathers day being a particularly rough day for you during your summers. How you would call Javier’s house but he’d have to explain that he was on his way out fishing with Chucho. He can't think too hard about all of that, he might crumble himself and he had to be strong, he had to be that for you. You step up and look over your shoulder, nearly tripping–Javier catches you at your elbow and you are trembling.

“Sorry, I’m trying to catalog all the questions I have.” You chuckle and there isn't a bit of humor behind it, just nerves and all. “His house is way too nice. This door knob looks like pure gold.” You attempt a joke but Javier can't seem to laugh either. And like the brave girl you are, you don't hesitate this time, you twist the doorknob pushing the door open. Ahead of you was a grandiose hallway, white paneled walls with tiny intricate floral designs.

The door to his office is already in your view, a long ottoman right outside the door like a waiting room. It felt nothing like a home, like a sterile office or a Homes and Gardens spread. Javier selfishly thinks of how their home will look one day, it will never feel this cold, not in the Louisiana heat. He’d settle down with you in Louisiana. He decided this weekend, he’d like to watch you bask in under the cajun sun with a belly.

The two of you stand side by side in front of a door with no imperfections but a carving of the letter L on the wood. Your brows furrow, “Okay.” You exhale, turning to Javier knowing this is where you part, knowing that whatever goes on behind those doors could hurt you in a way he fears he can never fix. So maybe he’s just as scared, he nods silently and firm. Still putting his act up for your sense of security, he knows you can read right through it, he also knows you love that he does this for you.

He can see it on your lips, see the 3 words, the words he knows you tried to spill out twice on this trip. He shakes his head and grabs your face in a chaste kiss. Your hands hold at his shoulders as you rise on your tiptoes to return it deeper. He doesn’t let you stall, he steps away. “I’ll be right here.” Javier juts his chin toward the ottoman, and he watches you disappear into the room.

Sitting down with a strain in his lower back from the drive and his body's reaction to the thought of the ride they have to take once this is all over. Javier leans his head back, his eyes facing the ceiling. Touched with a heavy weight and the lingering thought of maybe one day having one of these moments with his own mother, if she’s out there. He busies himself with an attempt of remembering her face, drawing her in white lights behind his closed eyes that he was too damn scared to open, scared to be present. Scared of not being strong enough for you. Afraid of opening his eyes and seeing a blackhole ready to swallow him whole, engulfing himself in his own grief that he’s shoved down trying to be a man for you.

He sees your face at first, angled cheeks he first sees you now, a longer face–lips full, a nose with a tiny slope and teeth always threatening to split your lips in a smile. He also sees what you looked like in 1980, rounder cheeks, the face of a shy girl. He remembers your cheeks always being pink. His chest constricts when he pictures that same young face full of tears at fault of his own fears. That's when he makes out his mothers face, eyebrows a light-light brown, so light they always seemed barely there. Her freckle below her eye, her eyes clad with glasses and quirk between her brow. Of disapproval for all things involving their life as a family.

Javier snaps his eyes open at the thought. Straightening up, attempting to now hear what was being said behind the door. His eyes adjust to the bright light of the hall, it really felt like a waiting room. Javier blinks away the floaters.

In front of him is a single picture hung on the wall.

It's an image of your father, he sees the resemblance immediately. But that isn't what catches his eye. Javier's heart drops nauseatingly fast at the sight of two young girls-twins, in the photograph. And in cursive in the far corner,

Best Dad Ever

He’s up and hugging you before you could take in that this is really happening. The hug is tight, it's unfamiliar, it's strangling and you attempt to hug back to make it feel loving but it just isn't there yet. You want to pinch yourself, you've dreamt up this moment. You hugged your own aching body to sleep countless nights wishing for a hug from your father and now that it’s here, you can't even register the difference between him and a stranger.

He holds your face for a moment with his eyes misty, your chin quivers then. He was a splitting image of your grandfather. Eyes a hazel, his hair shaggy and long. Like he doesn't belong in a home this large, you close your eyes for a moment. Overstimulated with the situation, your father cradles your face for the first time since you were a premature newborn. He even calls you beautiful a few times and you’ve never felt stronger for not melting into a puddle of tears. Perhaps you were just too happy.

It was the happiest moment.

You sit in front of him and he has a sheet in front of him. You couldn't be bothered talking about yourself again but you do anyway, he leaned in with every small fact. He beams with a laugh when you tell him that little Frankie was expecting a baby and wedding. He claims that these past years he wondered what you were doing with your life, once your eighteenth birthday approached he says he stayed up the entire night wondering what this next step would look like for you.

“It seems like you've done well for yourself–I'm sorry Andrea, I’m sorry I wasn't there.” You were the only person in tears in the room but you couldn't be bothered to be embarrassed. The tears were only joyful, those sorts came rarely for you. You allowed them to flow without shame.

It’s okay dad, it's okay. You whisper, “My mom–she says she left because you were–”

“An addict.” He cuts. “I was, I got clean the second she fled with you. I called my mom and she sent me to a rehabilitation facility in New York. It’s where I lived most of my life, where I built my business. Where I met my wife.” He smiles to himself and you smile too. What a privilege it is to be loved by someone else. “She isn't home today, told her we would be meeting today and she decided to not overwhelm you so she’s out. I hope you don’t mind.”

You reach out for the box of tissues at his desk, dabbing your eyes. “It's okay–I'm sorry that my mom did that– leaving without notice, it-it kills me when I think of it.” You wipe again as more tears fall, god why was it so difficult to talk when crying. You think of the day after your birth often, you think of your father asleep in a hospital chair, you think of him waking up in an empty room. Your heart chips away slowly but then you look at his face again and he looks just as confused.

He straightened up and his jaw clenched. You were to oblivious to notice the change in his demeanor.

“Andrea– I knew she was going to leave– I- I encouraged her to… I was too sick. I wasn't ready then– I waited six years until I had kids.”

You swear the feeling was akin to being cut by the sharpest blade, sliced slowly down your sternum and the weight of the world on your shoulders. There you are, in front of your father, bleeding out, being drained in front of him. Your head feels light as everything you thought you knew turns on its head. Your eyes fall to your knees, staring into the denim of your pants, trying to register if any of this is real.

What? You whisper.

“Oh Andrea–Melissa–your mother. She sat in that hospital bed and cried, she begged me to get clean for you, but she didn't know how all of that worked. I had to do it for myself, and I did. I asked her to leave. I wasn’t ready, sweetheart.”

The name stung, you sat there, you were an open wound in front of your father as he explains that he made the choice to reject you.

Your chin quivered in a new way, no longer happy. No longer tears between teeth, “I’m really confused.”

“I forgave myself for that decision in rehab. I found god and I absolve myself from that guilt through years of healing, Adalina and Adare’s birth helped me free myself from that decision. I knew you were taken care of I had to–”

“I-I wasn't taken care of. I wasn't loved. I was ignored–I-I spent the holidays alone. I was raised by a nanny–When-when I fell off my bike I relied on my brother's best friend to take care of me. I needed you but I was never angry at you for not looking because I thought you were left completely in the dark.” Each word came with a sob so deep, you weren't sure your body could handle a heartbreak like this. His lips thinned and his brows creased in sympathy that didn't feel genuine. You had sisters, sisters with names awfully close to your own. "Did-did you know where I was?"

"I had you address for several years, yes." Cooly he says it. “Andrea–I'm really upset to hear that. I had assumed you were okay, you never looked for me.”

You shook your head with closed eyes, tears staining your neck. “I shouldn't have to–I’m the child…” You whined, regressing to a little girl, you couldn't help it. This was the worst pain you've felt. “I needed you– I needed a dad.”

“I understand, I understand the importance of a father in a young woman's life–I've got two of my own–But I cannot be sorry for the decision I made twenty two years ago.” How could he be so cold, so analytical. How is it that he talks about the situation like he’s just an observer?

“Three, you have three daughters.” Your voice sobers, its anger this time. You were so upset that he couldn't see this the way you do. Your eyes burn into his and there isn't anything, there's nothing. You began to wonder how he could be the product of a woman like Lorena. “You had me on January 14th 1964, you watched my mom carry me for 7 months before she couldn’t– I’m your daughter too.” You spit without a shaking breath.

His face tightens and he nods, “Technically speaking yes-”

“Oh give me a fucking break!” You cuss, jumping to your feet and he jumps in his seat.

“Please do not cuss in my home.”

You were red hot, fuming as your eyes finally took in the catholic iconography throughout the office. And the many, many pictures of your sisters. Wiping your tears with your palms, fast like you want to hide from him that he even made you cry in the first place. “You are a pathetic person. I feel so ridiculous having wasted so many years wanting you. I’ll see my way out.” You turn and he’s following you, repeating your name but no apologies. You swing the door open and Javier is there at his feet already, with a tense face. You see it, he heard it all and he’s angry.

“Please Andrea, let's just pray together.”

You cackle and glance at your boyfriend. “Let's go Javi.” You storm past him, swinging the backdoor open.

The second the rolling front yard and southern sun hits your skin you begin to sob. Chest wracking yet silent as you walk away from your fathers home. As you walk away from someone else's father. You chest hiccuping as you blurily lead yourself down the path, Javier's steps quickening behind you. Your cheeks hot and stung with tears, head pounding you knew you looked like a swollen hot mess. You hug your own shaking body all the way to the car. Climbing in the passenger's seat with more tears.

You aren't sure if you could ever be okay.

Javier circles the car with his heart in his throat, hearing each word and feeling the cuts deep. He sits and thinks, she won't be able to handle this. He knows you, he knows you enough to love you. He knows you are strong, he also knows no child is strong enough to face rejection from a parent. So he stares at your father before you have walked out the home, he contemplates killing him there. He wants to hurt the man for making you ache so badly. Call him crazy or irrational, but he thought it for a split second. Thought of hurting him.

Javier decides taking care of you was far more important than his anger.

He walks behind you,

It felt like a huge joke, like a fuck you. The beautiful scenery of the estate, the birds chirping and the world still spinning, and you're there, hugging your own body while you silently weep ahead of him.

He doesn't start the car when he gets in. He stares ahead, sick to his stomach at the sound of your cries. His eyes glued to the steering wheel, his peripheral catches you shifting to lean your temple against the window. The car was hot, sitting out in this sun. Hot enough to burn you once your elbow touches a belt buckle but the heat felt trivial. Javier glances at the map, prepared to drive back into New Orleans and extend their weekend, take you away for more days. Allow you to be detached for some more time, this was far too much for you.

“I want to go home Javi.” You whisper between tears, “It was…dumb of me to look for a family out here.”

There it was again, your eagerness for a complete family. For someone to see you, understand your pain, he heard you beyond that door. He heard you talk about being left alone, celebrating holidays with only yourself. He heard you begging for sympathy from your own blood from your own family. He heard your voice so small when you begged him to see you as his own child, as his own family.

Javier panics, he’s so overcome with emotion he isn't sure he has the words to comfort you. He can't get out what he's tried to tell you all weekend. You will always have a family with him, you no longer have to search. But it doesn't come out from his mouth.

Instead, he reaches his hand over to you and between his thumb and his pointer he rubs the earring he gifted you. The earring, the reminder. Without words he tells you, I’ve got you. He watched you the past two days rub the thing as a nervous tick, he sees your brows furrow and your chin quiver once more before you cave and lean your head against his hand. Your cries regulate and calm with each pass of his thumb against the delicate little bee in your ear. Javier watches you with blurred eyes and he remembers meeting you for the first time. He remembers putting bandages on your knees and peeling oranges for you and diving into lakes and biking, and blushing and kissing and leaving. And And And,

“Andrea, I really, really love you.”

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