#and ben resents her for 'trapping' him

[marinerainbow]

If Poppy and Ben had a child, I imagine they'd have a son named Timmy (Timothy being his full first name).

Definitely not thinking about another angsty timeline with this information.

[burymeinblack13]

There’s a lot wrong with season 4 of The Umbrella Academy but I also wish there was more of an emphasis on the fact that the umbrellas LITERALLY LOST THEIR POWERS?!?

FOR 5 YEARS?!?

I wanna know more about that. How does that affect them?

I mean does luther find himself with more scrapes and bruises? He tries to pick up a couch and throws his back out because he can’t lift it

Does diego find himself more clumsy? He’s bumping into things more. Grace plays catch with him and he misses every throw

Alison hears someone playfully tell her that ‘they heard a rumour that there’s a new casting call’ and he blood runs cold

Does Klaus start off as the same adrenaline junkie? Until he gets more sick than he’s ever been, his body can’t handle everything in his system, when he truly realises his mortality. But then he realised the ghosts are gone.

Five comes to the realisation that he’s just a boy. His 60-odd aged mind even more trapped than it ever was. Is this the retirement he was wanting or is he now more on edge for the next earth shattering event?

(Sparrow) Ben is truly alone. His powers being the only thing left of what family he had and it’s gone. He’s surrounded by people who only know him through the lens of someone he isn’t.

And Viktor is ordinary. Again. Is he pleased with it? Does he still harbour some resentment? He moves to get a fresh start but he really can’t seem to start it with anyone. Is he emotionally distant-I mean quite literally every relationship he’s been in manages to get fucked up. Maybe he doesn’t even realise that he’s being cold?

I wish the show did more to show the long-standing effect of the loss of the powers that are apart of them!!

[fayes-fics]

A Helping Hand

2k Celebration Masterpost

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader, modern AU

Summary: Modern AU. Benedict walks in on reader whilst she’s fantasising about him...

Warnings: 18+ smut, minors DNI, masturbation, voyeurism, vaginal fingering, female orgasm.

Word Count: 2.9 K (hahah "250-word drabble")

Authors Note: Eighth in my 2k follower celebration "drabbles". This is a request fill for @silverhallow from their ask HERE. This went WAYYYYYY over a drabble, sorry, I tried to reign it in, I really did. Unbetaed. Enjoy! <3

The uttering of his name is what catches his attention. 

It’s muffled and distant to his ears as he quietly closes the front door. He's just here to visit his little sister El, but he knows some of her flatmates' work shifts, so he always enters quietly, almost furtive. Tucking the key into his pocket, he shakes his head, convinced it was just an auditory ghost. 

But then he hears it again, closer now that he has moved down the corridor. It’s female but sounds edged with desperation. The hair on the back of his neck prickles, suddenly filled with concern that someone may require assistance, trapped perhaps under some heavy furniture. The fact no one knows he is even in the flat doesn't occur to him.

_____

You wish you didn't. 

Want him as much as you do.

Benedict bloody Bridgerton.

He's your best friend’s older brother, never a good idea, but damn if he isn't every single thing you desire in a man. Tall, lithe, chestnut hair, hazy eyes, large, artistic hands and a troublesome crooked grin that makes butterflies erupt every time. Every. Damn. Time. And so, almost reluctantly, he is to be the star of your masturbatory fantasy tonight, indeed most nights lately. 

Freshly showered, you peel off your robe, turn down your bedside light to a faint glow, and climb into your newly made bed, savouring the clean scent and the fluffiness of your pillows. Choosing to lay right in the middle of your double bed, your hands start to wander over your body, thoughts of him, his smiling face, filling your mind. As your fingers brush your nipples, you can't help his name escaping your lips.

“Ben…” it's breathy and feels wonderful in your mouth as your mind swirls with the image burned into your retina. It’s of him getting out of the pool last summer, water sluicing down the slim toned lines of his body as he shook out his hair like some bloody model. You almost bit through your damn lip, trying to keep in the sigh.

Your hands wander lower, swirling patterns over your belly that make you giggle in that same coquettish way you do when he cracks a joke in your presence. Part of you resents him for making you so damn giggly, to begin with; part of you wants him to make you laugh every day forever.

Then your fingers slide between your legs, and you call his name for real now as you encounter slick wetness, which is entirely his fault. 

“Benedict…” you moan, louder this time, using his full name.

Suddenly overheated as you begin to make little circles with your middle finger, you throw back the covers around your ankles and screw your eyes shut, concentrating even harder on that mental Rolodex of memories of a man you should not be fantasising about. 

“Benedict…” There is no disguising your moan now. Or your apparent addiction to saying his name. A slight clench deep in your gut every time you do, just heightening every sensation.

_____

He pushes open the door, filled with concern.

And screeches to a halt.

Oh god. It's YOU.

He didn't know this was YOUR room.

And oh fuck you are entirely naked, eyes closed, and… holy shit, you are masturbating.

His entire being is haywire. Chemicals flood his system making his head pound and his chest restrict. And his blood flow is entirely redirected southwards.

If there is one person who has always been on his ‘danger, danger’ list for as long as he can remember, it's you. But you are his little sister's best friend, which somehow seems wrong. But now. Dammit, nothing in him can remember why that is such a bad idea. 

His eyes can't help sliding down your body, knowing how wrong it is to do this. To watch, to spy, to be a voyeur without your permission. And yet…. He doesn't stop. In fact, he does the opposite—slumping back onto the door so it accidentally clicks closed. Gaze roaming, drinking in your naked body, the line of your neck, the peak of your breasts, the flare of your hips, the shape of your legs as they writhe and oh god, the sound. The sound of your moans, your feet as they drag on the sheet, and best, or perhaps worst of all, the sound of your body, the slick wetness of your arousal as you finger yourself, dripping onto your hand.

“Benedict…..”

Oh FUCK. He is in trouble now—just throbbing hot and insistently against his fly. He shuts his eyes and tilts his head back, knowing it's wrong. His logical brain trying to fight its way in. It's possible that you could be thinking about a different Benedict. Yes, that’s it, he tells himself, trying desperately to calm his arousal. It's probably that Cumberbatch fellow she is all hot and bothered about. The thought it's not about him seems to work, shaking the hypnotic state, and he turns around and grabs the door handle, trying to escape silently without you realising. 

“Bridgerton… please,” you groan, muffled as you turn your head and bite your pillow, still oblivious to his presence.

His forehead hits the door. Well, that's fucked it. Now he couldn't leave even if he wanted to. Which he really, really doesn’t. He's just going to have to style this out, and hope you will accept his presence. He's trying to decide the best approach that isn't creepy when you call out, and his instincts just take over.

“Oh god, please make me come…” 

“I will,” he growls, whipping around to face you.

And all movement in the bed ceases.

_____

Your eyes fly open, and for a split second, you blink, utterly nonplussed; your fantasy object appears to have actualised by your bedroom door.

Then he moves, and you squeal, realising that it is very much not a mirage. That is Benedict. The real Benedict.

You grab at the duvet around your ankles and scramble under it. 

Oh god. Oh god. Oh god!!!

How the fuck are you going to explain this???

Calling his name and…. Wait. 

Did he say….?

You peek out from under the covers, and he is still there. One pace closer but not invading your space.

“Wh… what are you doing here?” 

“I heard my name… I thought maybe someone needed help…” he seems sheepish.

I do! I do need help, your mind screams; I need those long fingers inside me!

You pull down the cover a little more so your face is visible. “Did you…?” You can't even bring yourself to complete the question.

“Yes, I saw, and I am so sorry,” he offers mutely, contrite. “I genuinely didn't mean to invade your privacy,” his tone sincere.

You sit up a little, your gaze falling to his jeans and holy fuck, he is aroused. Very aroused. 

Is there a chance?! He wants you back?

“Don't be,” you try for nonchalance, unable to look away from the outline in the denim, your mouth salivating.

“Do you want some help?” his ask is so soft that for a moment, you swear you misheard, but your gaze cuts to his face, and his eyes are burning intensely, pupils blown. 

“Yes, please,” you murmur back without thought. The warm smile that spreads across his face makes your heart gallop.

“Lay back down,” he says; the tone has changed. It's husky and deeper, and oh god, yes, please. “Pull down the covers.”

You do as bidden, your frame almost shaking with victory and apprehension as he takes a seat on the bed next to you.

“Touch me.” 

It's out of your lips before you can stop it. Then an entirely different, wolfish grin breaks out.

“Where?” he challenges.

“Anywhere…” you offer, desperate for his hands on your body.

He is staring at you like you are a buffet of delicious options; all you can do is lay there, breathing unevenly, awaiting his choice. When fingertips brush the inside of your wrist, you want to swoon. It's light, almost imperceptible, causing a shiver to run down your spine; goosebumps breaking out all over your limbs. You meet his fiery gaze and have to bite your lip as those warm fingers make their way slowly up the sensitive skin of your inner forearm, then onto your bicep. The tease of it is completely enthralling. When he reaches your shoulder, he changes to a drag of his palm as he maps your clavicle.

“May I kiss you?” he asks so sweetly that something warm blooms in your chest.

“Please…” your response soft.

He leans in, then his lips meet yours and something inside you melts, bends, alters. It’s chaste at first, but your hunger for him is barely slaked, so when you open your lips, and his tongue brushes yours, the atmosphere changes. He senses your need, and while you kiss ferociously, over and over, his hand slides to cup your breast. He flicks the pad of his thumb over your nipple, making you cry out into his mouth. Your own body shocking you, how much that touch is a lightning rod straight to your core.

“How do you want me to be?” he murmurs as he drops kisses across your cheek.

“What do you mean?” your voice unfocussed, pressing up into his touch, his thumb still brushing teasingly over your pebbled nipple.

“Do you like silence or talking? Light touches or a firm hand? Praise or be called a bad girl? Do you like to be treated like a precious jewel or bossed around?” the casual way he asks hot into your ear, his lips catching your earlobe, makes your mind boggle. No one has ever asked what you want; they just sort of guessed and hoped you liked it. Or had no idea how do to anything different to what they did.

“I…” you stutter; all of the above are the words blinking like a neon sign in your mind.

_____

He chuckles outwardly at your lack of an answer but inwardly is indignant at every man who has ever been with you and not thought to ask.

“How about I try some things, and you tell me if you like them?” he suggests, enjoying your enthusiastic nodding, which makes him chuckle again, feeling you shiver under him as the vibration moves from his chest into you. So very responsive.

“What about you? Your preferences?” you ask belatedly with closed eyes as his lips map the column of your neck, tasting your shower gel and the warmth there, his thumb delighting in circling your areola.

“Irrelevant,” he dismisses into your skin, then pulls away to clarify after feeling your slight pout against his forehead. “Tonight, let's focus on your pleasure. Then if you enjoy yourself, perhaps we can discuss mine another time?”

He watches as you exhale a shaky, almost disbelieving okay, your stare locked on his. Again he is almost angry on your behalf that this appears to be the first time someone has offered you something expecting nothing in return. Part of him wants to yell at you for accepting mediocrity; part of him - the competitive, possessive part - wants to make this so good you never desire another man.

He kisses a line from your neck to your breast, feeling your weighted, anticipatory stare as he runs his nose lightly over your nipple before drawing it into his mouth, suckling hard, tasting the sweetness of your skin, the puffiness under his lips. Victory crests in his veins as your hand flies into his hair, silently asking for more, pushing up into his mouth. As he suckles, he runs a hand down your body, a firmer touch over your tummy that you appear to appreciate, and he can feel your pulse and breaths quickening under him as his destination becomes apparent.

“Now you were already so occupied here when I entered…” he rumbles into your breast, his fingers slipping between your thighs, which he is pleased to note seem to fall open on instinct. He revels in your sharp inhale and moans as he ploughs his fingers into your soaked flesh without a moment's hesitation. The viscous heat making his cock throb hard in his jeans. “Wow,” he breathes, kissing over to your other breast, “you are absolutely soaking, aren't you?”

It's rhetorical, but you appear incapable of answering anyway, just squirming into his touch, almost as if you want more and less all at once. 

“Harder,” you implore mutely, and he looks up from your breast.

“What was that?” he teases, watching micro-expressions of desire and abashment flutter over your features.

“Touch me, go harder,” you puff, almost cringing, which he happens to find utterly charming.

“Now we are getting somewhere…” he smirks, the press of his fingers becoming more determined. Finding your swollen clit with unerring precision and teasing flicks over it. The engorged nub feels delightful under the pads of his fingers; he has to tamp down the urge to pinch it and make you scream—for another time, perhaps.

He definitely needs to be the best you've ever had, a burning need under his ribs.

_____

You mutter nonsense and his name as he sucks on your nipple and nudges your clit at just the right speed to make you burn hot, mouth going slack, eyes fluttering shut.

“That’s it,” he murmurs into you, something about the praising tone firing your synapses. 

“Don’t stop,” your voice wrecked, almost a sob, as you feel yourself ascending an invisible ladder. “Please, just don’t stop.”

“I won't,” he promises duskily, “in fact…..”

And that is all the warning you get before he drives two fingers inside your weeping pussy, and you almost rocket off the bed. Those long elegant fingers reaching places you never have or could, the swell of his knuckles pressing your walls open. It's even better than you ever imagined. 

You chant his name and grip his arm, loving the flex of tendons as he rhythmically rocks into you. He watches you as you spiral, his eyes sparkling in the low lamplight. Being his sole focus makes everything melt away, turning molten and sweet, like warm toffee. 

Needing to reciprocate in some way, make him as unleashed as you, your hand falls instinctively to his lap and grasps his rigid cock. He groans loudly, his fingers inside you flexing, his teeth scraping your breasts, lighting a fire over your skin. 

He senses your urgency, your need for more, to push you higher. So his motions get stronger, firmer; he snags your nipple between his teeth and tugs gently, his thumb presses harder onto your clit, circling faster as his fingers start to hook and graze your walls, knowing when he has reached a sensitive spot by the flex of your fingers around his clothed cock and your biting of your lip.

“That's it, good girl,” he murmurs, moving up to capture your lips with a searing kiss. 

His other hand, which has been taking his weight on the mattress next to you, moves to cup the back of your neck, pull you up off the pillow slightly, grasping the hair at the base of your skull. Not painfully, just enough to heighten things.

“Look at me,” he demands gruffly, and you do, panting and mouth slightly agape, his eyes hungry and expression proud as you dangle so close to a precipice. “You look breathtaking, untamed, wild; I want to fuck you so hard you scream my name,” he confesses in more of a snarl than words, diving in for another kiss.

“Please….” you beg, uncertain what for, except more.

No one has been this primal with you before, meeting a need you didn't even know you had. Your cerebral processes taking a backseat, just rooted in your body and strung out on a tide of chemicals and sensations.

A few more moves of his fingers and you are palpitating inside; the pressure breaking like a dam, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body, so much he has to angle himself over you to hold you down as your muscles convulse; he has to push hard to keep his fingers inside you as you clench and release with a strength that makes him growl. You are crying out so loud the hand entwined in your hair moves and clamps over your mouth, gagging you and hushing you, leaning into your cheek with hot breaths, reminding you there are others in this flat, that you need to be quieter. Although all the while, as he says it, you can see the trace of smug hubris on his face that he is the cause. It makes you want to suck those fingers between your lips and bite him. 

As you flop, still panting, he withdraws his fingers and, just to tease, slides them into his mouth as you watch, disbelieving, clenching around nothing as his face contorts into ecstasy at your taste. Then he kisses you deeply, rolling your own flavour onto your tongue as his hands draw delicate lines over your torso.

“How was that?” he smirks as he pulls away. 

Your eyes are still closed from the kiss, suddenly awash with a drowsy sated pull deep in your being. Unfussed with words, in response, you move the hand idly twisted in his lap and grab his cock again, squeezing hard. 

“Stop that,” he groans but doesn't bat your hand away; he pushes into it, in fact. 

You just ghost a smile, eyes still closed, and lick your lips, pressing the flat of your palm against his length.

“Don't make me come in my underwear like a teenage boy,” he hums, tinged with recklessness.

“Take them off then,” your goad in a whisper, eyes popping open and meeting his, re-energised by the feral hunger you find there.

“Lock. The. Door.” he orders slowly and deadly, staring you down.

You can’t scramble for the door fast enough.

Benedict taglist: @makaylan @foreverlonginguniverse @iboopedyournose @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @margofiore @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @bridgertontess @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld @angels17324 @broooookiecrisp @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @eleanor-bradstreet @divaanya @musicismyoxygen84 @benedictspaintbrush @miindfucked @sorryallonsy @lilithseve @cayt0123 @hottytoddyhistory @truly-dionysus @fictionalmenloversblog @zinzysstuff @malpalgalz @panhoeofmanyfandoms @kinokomoonshine @causeimissu @delehosies @mlovesbridgerton @m-rae23

[strangefellows]

okay because i've been rotating it in my head while i have a cold and a fever and why the fuck not babble about this now!

my thoughts on ayin and angela under the cut because i have a LOT of them!

so i want to preface this with a very important disclaimer

NO MATTER WHAT ELSE I SAY HERE, AS A HUGE FAN OF AYIN (as you might notice he's my #1 projmoon blorbo), what Ayin did to Angela was wrong, and cruel, and unjustifiable, and she is 100% within her rights to hate him and resent him and have complicated feelings towards him and do everything she did in Ruina. No matter what I say about my thoughts on why he did it, I don't intend it to be an excuse or justification because it's not. He owes her an apology at the bare minimum and she does NOT owe him forgiveness or anything of the like if she doesn't feel like it. He was a total asshole and she deserved better.

THAT SAID

at the same time i don't think that ayin did what he did out of 100% outright malice and genuine hatred. i think he did what he did because he was extremely fucking traumatized, definitely probably autistic, and has the communication and emotional skills of a wet sock.

do i think he genuinely cared about angela? yes.

for what it's worth he LITERALLY CREATED A LIFE. LITERALLY. FROM SCRATCH. there's no way he didn't care about her on some level even if just as a creation because do you know how much work would have had to go into that? at some point even if he was doing it for selfish carmen related reasons he still had to care about her for her own sake on some level

(vaguely related but the fact that ayin did do this - plus just all of how lobcorp works as a wing - makes me think his background is in compsci or computer engineering or smth of that nature, with ben similarly in those fields / headcanon wise i run with he was originally compsci but after An Incident in which his own dreams were shattered he shifted to abnormal psych)

do i think he did not react well to the consequences of his actions when she finally woke up and he had to process he gave his creation the face of his dead crush + angela was completely trusting and obedient to him and even acted almost in love with him? also yes

is this justified for him? no. is it his own fucking fault for being selfish and stupid? yes.

do i think some of his cruelty towards her was not just out of lashing out via trauma and horror at what he'd done, but pushing her away the more she acted trusting/obedient bc he knew what he was setting her up to do via the script and felt tremendously guilty that he was doing this to someone who trusted him so implicitly? yes.

was, again, it justified? no.

but again, the bottom line is that while what he did was wrong and cruel, i don't think he hates her truly or that he harbored any malice towards her. i think he cared, and felt horribly guilty for what he did to her and continued to do to her, but again, trauma and 'tism and the emotional capabilities of a soggy cardboard box.

he owes her one hell of an apology at the LEAST for all he's done tbh

but another thing: i think that the reason he left the script blank for her after everything was finished was because he short-sightedly thought he was "freeing her" to make her own choices by leaving it blank not thinking for a goddamn second she would misinterpret it given his terrible behavior towards her up til that point. again, not out of malice but out of selfishness and idiocy and not knowing how to communicate At All

i also do think by the end of things after all those loops as X with her as one of the only anchors, he softened a lot towards her as he processed better how they were both trapped in an endless hell of his past self's making, and there's a lot to be said about how their feelings about each other are stupidly complicated due to all his interactions w her as X without his memories of what he'd done, and as he went thru the loops dying/committing suicide/suffering with her as the only witness. i like to think that though she hates him and has every right to and to not forgive him, it's extremely complicated and there's definitely a level of....something, having seen him suffering, but she's flawed and human and wonderful and stubbornly holding onto her hate and resentment and she's valid.

idk how much sense any of this makes but tldr ayin fucked up and treated his daughter like absolute shit and she's entirely in the right to hate/resent him and never forgive him but i don't think he truly hated her, i think he's just a fucked up idiot who made stupid choices out of trauma etc etc etc

tune in next time when i talk about how despite ayin's shitty life choices being his own shitty choices carmen absofuckinglutely gaslit the goddamn hell out of him and that deserves to be talked about! or when i talk about how ayin's shitty actions towards trapping the sephirah in the brainboxes AS sephirah was probably out of a misguided and selfish attempt to "save" them using the seedling of light process because he had regrets and cared about them and loved them and did all of that shit re: them out of coping badly with trauma mental illness and autism! (tho this is ostensibly explicitly canon imho).

holds up ayin. this is a traumatized autistic depressed mess of a man and he did so many stupid shitty things but he's not evil he's just a flawed human and ALL OF THIS is why dantayin theory (u knew it'd come up) because nobody LEAST OF ALL ANGELA truly got closure with this dumbass and they deserve that as much as he deserves a proper ending

[mangoshorthand]

How would Five react to his relationship with his wife turning out to be some weird Ben-Jen always meant to be because of the science bullshit minus the world ending? She has some particles that made her attracted to him and vice versa?

More context from a separate ask:

It is not dangerous, it isn't even useful it's just like magnets, courtesy his father's experiments. I don't assume he'll take it too well?

I think it depends how far into the relationship he was. If he knew before they started seeing one another then he'd avoid her like the plague. I even think in Parts 1-2 he would be slightly resentful of it, like he'd been somehow 'trapped' against his will. I think he would eventually come round to it, though because, at the end of the day, he's happy, so who the fuck cares?

If he found out after the JUICED scandal, moving into Part 3 (Flesh and Blood) I think he'd be all in for that shit.

He'd see it as like the one good thing Dad ever did for him. They're written in the motherfucking stars, now she HAS to marry him! She is locked. IN.

I thihk he'd also probably find it quite funny. Leaning in for a kiss like: "gimme a taste of those sexy particles, baby."

[morurui]

Just opened my mind and imagined a JWCC/JWCT night in the woods au. (If you know night in the woods and you're a fan of JWCC/JWCT, marry me.)

If you don't know night in the woods it follows Mae, who drops out of college due to circumstances out of her control and how she navigates her changing dynamics with her friends, uncovers a huge town mystery, and deals with her own inner issues. It's an amazing game that I highly recommended, but here's who l see everyone being! (Also in this au they all live in the same small town)

Darius as Mae

Returns back to his home town after some time away working at the DPW (in this au DPW stands for Department of Park Wildlife), wont really talk about what brought him back home, but just wants to live a normal life now. He acts like everything's cool, but deep down somethings wrong with him and he can't figure it out.

Ben as Bea

College wasn't exactly something Ben was able to go to, forcing him to work at his parents shop that has been passed down through generations. He's pretty frustrated at his current situation, but it's not like it's something he can easily get out of. This in turn causes him to build some resentment towards Darius for returning to a town he feels trapped in, which Darius was able to get out of. Him and Darius were close as kids but drifted away, eventually not talking until Darius returns home.

Sammy as Gregg

One of two close friends Darius made during high school, Sammy works at the town convenience store by the time Darius returns home. She’s working on saving up enough money to move out of town with her long term girlfriend, but is not only nervous of what Darius’s reaction would be to the news but is also scared of entering a new phase in her life. Due to this she reverts to pulling the same shenanigans (minor crimes that just serve as an annoyance rather than a huge issue) with Darius like they used to back in high school.

Yaz as Angus

Sammy’s long term girlfriend, as well as a new friend of Darius’s. In addition to also working to save up enough money to move out she is worried that Sammy and Darius might be slipping into old bad habits, which would only prolong their moving process. She cares deeply for Sammy, seeing her as one of the few constants in her life, making her worried that one of these “shenanigans” that the two pull could take Sammy away from her. She’s also been a good friend of Ben’s since middle school.

Kenji as Germ (I could not find any character other than Germ for Kenji bare with me)

Once Darius returns from his time away he becomes close friends with Kenji. They were acquainted back in high school due to him dating Brooklynn, but it’s only when Darius comes back that they form a strong bond, with them relating and understanding each others problems.

Brooklynn as Casey

The other one of Darius’s close friends made during high school as well as Kenji’s girlfriend. She, Darius, and Sammy would commit their “shenanigans” together back in the day and formed a close trio. She also dreamed of one day packing up and leaving the town, but these dreams were never realized. When Darius comes back from his time away he finds out that Brooklynn’s been missing for sometime after he left.

Also if you’re wondering if they are still in a band…of course they are! Darius plays the bass, Sammy plays the guitar, Brooklynn played the drum until she went missing and the role was filled by Ben, Yaz does vocals as well as bass for the time that Darius was gone, and Kenji’s there for moral support acting as their number one (and only) fan.

[myalchod]

AU where Rose Harvey is both alive and well and still with Ben post-Aster Dell 😌

But is it really an AU? Is it really? I guess we'll never know. Thanks, showrunners. 😒

1. She knows there are things he saw during his time in Rosalind’s battalion that she won’t ever be able to understand, because she's been a soldier but the battalion was a different thing entirely. They'd always talked in the past, though, sharing as much as they could; that promise had been in their wedding vows, codifying something she'd always thought they were in perfect accord on ... but the man who comes back from the war is not the man who swore to always open his heart to her. (She is not sure if the woman he finds waiting is the same, either, though she does not examine that thought too closely.)

2. They had talked about having children when the war was over. Her pregnancy in its final years is unplanned, the failure you never think will happen to you of all people, and she thinks long and hard before deciding to keep it. The why is more complicated, a thing she isn't entirely sure she understands sometimes, but once she decides that is that, and she does not know if he is relieved or resentful when she leaves the front lines.

3. She has made herself a home and a life by the time he comes back, battered and bruised but with the truest wounds inside. There is space for herself and the son who clings to her leg and looks at him with uncomprehending eyes and the infant who does not know hands that had once been warm and steady and always so ready to reach. He tries to fit into it, and she tries to make space for him too, and for a few years it very nearly works. But their home is full of ghosts and secrets and unspoken wounds, hers as well as the multitudes that have followed him back, and by the end their fracturing feels all but inevitable.

4. “I’m your wife!” she all but screams at him, when he says that he can’t explain things to her for what feels like the hundredth, thousandth, millionth time. It would be easier, she thinks, if he were to explode in response and they could give vent to all that remains unspoken, but he only looks at her like some sad kicked animal and that just makes her more irritated in turn. How dare he, when she keeps reaching and reaching and he only withdraws into his secrets and into himself? She knows he is hurt, but what is she to do about it when he won’t let her in? (What is she to do when she has her own wounds and pain and scars and it feels like he doesn’t even see them? What is she to do when she shares a house and a family and a life with a stranger?)

5. “I still love the man I married,” is what she tells him when he finds her packing a bag, “but that's not the person I see in front of me — and I have to take care of myself, Ben. No one else here will do it.” (He has Farah and Saul, both as changed as he is, bound together in their shared secrets. She has no one within Alfea’s borders and she needs someone to turn to, someone who can help her find her footing again. She can’t wait any longer.) “I love you,” he says, like it can solve things, but she can see that he believes it as little as she does right now, no matter what they both might want. (She doesn't tell him that there are days when she looks in the mirror and doesn't recognise herself either. She may not have seen the same parts of the war that he did, but it left her no less changed.)

6. Distance helps. She has to be Rose before she can be anything else — before she can support anyone else — and without having to worry about what she is for others, she can for once focus on herself first of all. She hopes he can learn the same lesson, though she is doubtful when he remains trapped by a past he cannot seem to let go of. But, however much they both do or do not change, the space makes things easier for her, and for now, it’s what she needs.

7. There was a time when he had meant home to her, and she had been the same to him. She hopes, despite all that has happened, that some day she will be able to find her way back home again, whatever that ends up meaning.

[ ask me another ] [ all answers ]

[sagetheenbymage]

HI SAGE!

Okay so. I was thinking about how it seems that Ian has better chemistry with Addison than her actual fiancé. Working off of that, I'm thinking of writing a fic where it turns out that Ben and Addison, after years of leaping (and after Ben returns home), decide that they no longer work as a domestic partnership. The parting is a sad but there is no anger or resentment; they agree that they are different people now who don't work together as they ought to, and that after they both take some time off, they can at least be civil to each other at work, and maybe rebuild their friendship. After a respectful half-year, Ian comes to Ben to ask if them asking Addison out would cause drama. Ben says that it would hurt, but it would be unfair for him to cause drama or demand that Addison never falls in love again. Ultimately he gives his... blessing, for lack of a better word, by saying that he will not allow his feelings on the matter to effect his relationship with either of them. He tells them that he was already so glad that Ian was there for her as a friend before Ben could be, and that he knows they'll be good for each other. An hour later, he has a similar conversation with Addison, who appears to be completely unaware that Ian's been looking at her with a totally in love expression for months now. A month later, and Ben's tired of Ian and Addison pining at each other. Magic is tired of Ian and Addison pining at each other. Jenn is tired of Ian and Addison pining at each other. Janice disappears because she is sick of the mutual pining. And neither of them have spoken to each other. Eventually, it's Ben of all people who traps the pair into talking it out.

I wanted to know your thoughts on this?

UGH, I LOVE THIS SO MUCH ARE YOU KIDDING??

I’ve heard people talk about how Ian & Addison have more chemistry then Addison & Ben and honestly…they’re not wrong.

OKAY, OKAY, IM ALREADY BURSTING WITH IDEAS HOLY SHIT.

I’m thinking…longfic slow burn romance, it would be my first longfic, and I’d probably post it on ao3 if I were to guess.

it might take me a bit since it is a long fic…I’m currently in Hawaii, (which is like, amazing, I went to a luau last night and it was incredible!!) ANYWAY

I might get started on Tuesday if I were to guess…if that’s OK with you of course? I won’t start it until you give me the go ahead because it is you’re idea, (and of course I’ll give you credits in the summary.)

[thereallarosebleu]

KAGERO'S MASTERLIST

before we start, i'd like to give the CW's. CW for mentions of suicide, childhood abuse, and... mineta. 💀

also, if it seems jumbled and out-of-place, or a little bit rambly, please forgive me, my memory is awful and i like to pull a lot of things out of my ass.

~

hi! welcome to kagero's masterlist.

this contains every little tidbit, nugget, or piece of information about kagero. it will be edited as needed. though, you may be wondering...

who is kagero?

~

BACKGROUND INFO:

kagero is my MHA oc! her full name is kagero todoroki. you may have guessed that she is a todoroki! she has white hair and blue eyes. her quirk is blueflame!

fun fact about her quirk: it used to be hellflame, like her father, and her hair used to be red! when she hit puberty, which was about at 10 years old, her quirk changed to blueflame and her hair started to turn white! (like brother like sister, LOL)

almost everybody in her family resents her. there's not much to say about fuyumi and natsuo, but toya and shoto... they don't really like her. toya resents her because he thinks she had the life he never had (which, not true), and shoto just kinda... hates her. they just butt heads.

her birthday is october 2nd! she's just a few months younger than shoto! another fun fact... she was born kind of as a... backup. a backup if shoto didn't work out (womp womp...).

~

CURRENT LIFE:

kagero attends UA high alongside her brother, shoto. enji never wanted her to attend UA, but she took the exam behind his back and got in! so, uh... suck it, enji, i guess 🤷‍♀️

there's a really funny thing that happens at the entrance exam that i MUST share with you guys. though, i do have to give a fair warning. it contains...

mineta...

if you don't like that, please... click away now. mineta is very involved in kagero's lore, and there's pretty much no escaping him when you dive into it.

here's the story.

~

mineta is trapped by god-knows-what, has ben trapped for a while. obviously he's small, he can't free himself.

this is when kagero finds him.

she frees him, and he's... entranced. enthralled. he doesn't know what to say. his first thought about her is "she really needs some brown contacts", and i love that for them.

in fact, this interaction kind of had a big impact on him that you'll see later

(and this interaction will be important later, too, so please, remember it)

~

when she finally gets to UA, she fits right in. she becomes part of the bakusquad (of course she becomes friends with BAKUGO 😒), and... mineta is just kinda doing mineta things. like he does. all the girls hate him (LOL), but kagero? she's... low-key... no, HIGH-KEY in love with him.

why?

to make a long story short, she's in love with him because she wants to be loved. her father didn't love her, she didn't get to know her mother for that long, and her siblings all hate her too. she can't really distinguish that it's... wrong. that she shouldn't love him. she just sees attention, and goes "yep, i want that!".

(if you want me to save kagero, pay me $10,000 and i'll change the lore for you! any less and it's a no deal. 🥰)

something that also was kinda discussed but isn't that important is when dabi, the villain, HER BROTHER, debuted, UA almost considered kicking her out due to her sharing a quirk with him. they didn't. you wanna know WHY!?

deku gave one of his speeches as to why she should stay. let's all thank izuku midoriya for saving her schooling career 🙏🏻😞

anyway, everything is pretty normal until season 6. season 6 is when it gets WILD.

~

SEASON 6 LORE:

kagero gets fucking wild in season 6. one of the most noteable events is when she goes to fight dabi! 😊

at first, her father made her stay home. she wasn't allowed to go fight him. but, she found out about how shoto was kinda blown out of the sky, and... she couldn't just leave him like that! sure, she hates him for having everything she couldn't have, but she doesn't HATE him... so, she goes to fight him, it goes... okay i guess? i mean, it's kind of an even match, but dabi eventually just flees (LOL).

fast forward a few weeks, enji is just kinda... mad at kagero. he's been ignoring her, and she's had enough. so, one day when she's at home with her father, she climbs to the top of their roof and... jumps off.

now this changes EVERYTHING. especially the suicide note (notes, really), she leaves. she writes a poem for each member of her family, and jumps off with the poem she wrote for toya in hand. it's... bad.

her father hears the thump, and thinks some animal just died, but to his ABSOLUTE HORROR, it's his daughter.

(if you read the poem written in enji's perspective about when she killed herself, you're probably confused because in the poem it says she stabbed herself. in all honesty, the poem was just old, and i didn't really know how she was going to attempt to kill herself at that moment in time, so... yeah. if it changes again, just know it's not really set in stone.)

the reason why this changes everything is because it changes enji's whole perspective on his daughter, and the poem she left him really helped with that too. he suddenly loved her, and that wasn't really all that good for kagero. it just showed her that the only way for somebody to care for her was to do something drastic.

~

RELATIONSHIPS:

oh boy.

oh lord.

oh fuck.

i cannot stress how much you guys are NOT ready for this. you are NOT ready for what is about to come.

so, kagero is madly in love with mineta. we've been over this. it's bad. really bad. it's really funny because all of the other girls are trying to get her to realize how bad it is and she just... SHE CAN'T! 😭

and, if you thought she was going to be shipped with somebody better, like bakugo, or kirishima, or some other shit i pray for you, i pray for your family because i have greatly let you down.

it's funny because mineta kinda changes for her in a way. not completely, obviously he's still a nuisance and a menace, but atleast he's not creeping on other women anymore! 🥲👍 (and in a way, the girls thank her for her sacrifice)

and yeah even though mineta is a creep and a weirdo, atleast kagero and him have a very wholesome relationship for the most part.

for the most part...

~

THANKS:

hey! i'd like to give my thanks to you if you read this whole thing. if you did, comment a grape emoji! i like to see all of you suffer as you get constantly reminded of mineta on this blog.

thank you to AJ who started this whole mess. shoutout to AJ. they're a real one.

EDIT LIST DOWN HERE:

fri, mar 29: no edits yet! i just posted it (rip my fingers) 🥲

fri mar 29: i had to add mineta tags i just had to...

[zepskies]

IKR? He really should've called, or at least texted. 🙄

Hahaha that's the EXACT scene I had in mind, especially in her response:

You rolled your eyes, but a smile threatened to take over your frown as he pulled you flush against him, trapping your hands against his broad chest. You found purchase on the hard fabric of his uniform.  “You’re so gross,” you said.

LOL the Sid/Nancy/Churchill exchange was one of my favorite parts to write here in Part 1. So glad you liked those lines! 😂😂

Oh my goodness, this is beautiful and really shows the character growth that Ben has gone through while still remaining true to who he is.

Aww thank you, lovely! That's exactly what I was going for. Even when he's being a grumpy grump, he's showing his progress loll. And adding to his backstory was so fun! Christmas in particular can be a time for reflection on the past, and I thought it would be interesting to have him remember things more honestly, without it all shaded by his ego and resentment -- that it wasn't all black and white with his family (in particular his father).

Getting to your Part 2 comments soon!

Love Actually - Part 1

Paring: Soldier Boy/Ben x Reader

Summary: Ben gets in late on Christmas Eve with a Grinch-like attitude, but you’re determined to force some holiday cheer into his system.  

AN: Here’s my last entry for the TGWRC: Christmas in July event! It’s set in the same world as “Break Me Down,” and set before “Checkerboard.” But this can be read as a stand-alone! Hope you enjoy…

Theme: Christmas movies Prompt: “That’s a poor excuse for a tree.” 

Word Count: 3,100 Tags/Warnings: SB being himself, wee bit of angst, potential fluff overload! 

Part 1: "Humbug"

He was late. 

It was Christmas Eve, and your boyfriend was late. 

With a large bowl of popcorn in your lap, you sunk further into your favorite corner of the couch, drumming your nails on its arm. 

Your favorite Christmas movie played on the ridiculously large flatscreen Ben had insisted on when you two moved into this apartment. But you couldn’t get into the story like you normally would.

It was the first Christmas you and Ben were spending together since he’d started working with, instead of against Supe Affairs and the CIA. In fact, he was on an extended mission—hunting down a rogue supe in Idaho, of all places.

Freakin’ Idaho. Goddamn potatoes, you thought irrationally, shoving another handful of popcorn into your mouth.  

While he’d been gone, you went all out in decorating the apartment: red and white candles, stockings, various ornaments, multicolored string lights, and poinsettias. You’d even found a nice little tree that fit in the only free corner of the living room.

Well, you’d had to rearrange some furniture to make that happen, but in the end you’d succeeded. It felt like you were living at the bottom of a snow globe.

You hadn’t heard from Ben at all in over two weeks. The day he left you outside your office in the Surveillance department replayed often in your mind.

Two weeks ago…

“Don’t give me that face, baby doll.” 

Ben quirked a smile at your concerned frown, and he propped a gentle fist under your chin. You crossed your arms.  

You knew he had to go. Butcher and the rest of the guys were waiting outside the S.A. office. And you were proud of him for what he was doing, genuinely trying to put in the work on this “hero” thing. But you didn’t have to like the timing. It was only two weeks until Christmas.

“Fine,” you agreed. “Just get this guy quick. I don’t want to hear my aunt’s shady-ass sniping. Every time I show up to a family gathering by myself, she starts plotting my arranged marriage to her fucking pediatrist, her divorce attorney—mind the irony there—or even the guy who packages meat at the grocery store—” 

“All right, Christ. I’ll be back in fucking time,” said Ben. He grabbed your arms to stop your verbal flapping. Then with a grin, his hands moved to the curve of your waist, down to get a healthy grip of your ass. 

“’Sides, I’m the only one flingin’ meat around here,” he said with a deepening smirk. 

You rolled your eyes, but a smile threatened to take over your frown as he pulled you flush against him, trapping your hands against his broad chest. You found purchase on the hard fabric of his uniform. 

“You’re so gross,” you said. But you pulled him down for a searing kiss. If you weren’t going to see his handsome face for a while, then you were going to make the most of this moment. 

And it seemed your boyfriend felt the same way; his arms wrapped around your frame like steel bands. Your fingers swept through his hair as your tongue slipped into his mouth, making his grip on you tighten with a pleased hum. 

“Oi! Sid and fuckin’ Nancy,” Butcher called from down the hall. “Got a fucking job to do. Today, if you don’t mind.”

Ben broke away from you, just enough to frown in irritation over your head. 

“Calm your fucking tits, Churchill. I’ll leave when I’m good and damn ready.”

You couldn’t help but giggle into his chest.

Now, it was quite literally hours away from Christmas Day. 

You would be seeing your family tomorrow, regardless. You and Ben were supposed to go to your mother’s house for dinner. But you were starting to think that he might not make it tonight, let alone tomorrow. 

And if you had to deal with your aunt nosing into your personal business again, your hand might just “slip” while pouring yourself a rum-filled eggnog, so you wouldn’t be held liable for your actions when you inevitably snapped on the bitch.

Sighing, you continued munching on some popcorn while you focused on one of your favorite parts of Love Actually. Hugh Grant was shaking his ass to “Jump In” by the Pointer Sisters.

The music was infectious, and you found yourself doing a little shimmy yourself on the couch in time with one of your favorite rom-com Brits. 

With the TV volume as loud as it was, not even the door of your apartment unlocking could stop your mini-jam session. 

And the door soon opened, revealing a dusty, soot-covered Benjamin, still in his supe suit and tactical gear. He took a small step back when the gaudy Christmas décor assaulted his eyes, but he blinked through it as he turned his head. 

His lips curved at the familiar sight of you—bundled up in your pajamas and a fuzzy blanket on the couch, bopping to the beat of some shitty ‘80s song he actually recognized. You were alternatively mouthing the words and eating fistfuls of popcorn. 

Shaking his head, Ben stepped into the apartment and shut the door with some force. You finally perked up at the sound, your smile alight with happiness when you realized he was home. That alone made him soften a bit. 

“Ben!” You paused your movie and bounded over to greet him with a warm hug and a deep kiss.  

He brushed your hair back and allowed himself to revel in the familiarity of you in his arms. 

“Aren’t you a fucking sight,” he murmured.

Ben was still getting used to having someone to come home to, but it was grounding. This place was his home now, mostly because you were in it.  

“You okay? How did it go?” you asked, wiping off some soot from his cheek. 

“Who do you think you’re talking to?” Ben offered you a cocky smile. “We smoked that pyro bitch.”

Your eyes narrowed. “You what?”

“Relax, the supe’s alive,” he said, rolling his eyes, as if it grated him to admit it. He wouldn’t tell you that the supe had two broken arms and probably a crack in his skull. “Being shipped off to prison as we speak.”

You nodded with a smile. “Good. I’m proud of you.” 

His lips pulled at a grin. But then you took his face between your hands with a hard slap (though it didn’t even sting, the point was made in your annoyed frown). 

“You’re late,” you said. Ben raised a brow. 

“Excuse me?” he said. 

“You heard me. You’re fucking late,” you repeated. “Go take a shower. I already started the first movie without you.” 

You tugged him by the hand and all but pushed him into the hall that led to your shared bedroom. 

Ben wasn’t one to be manhandled though. He dug his heels in obstinately. 

“Christ, I just got home. All I want to do is sleep…unless you want to give me a proper fucking welcome.”

He glanced at you over his shoulder with a more than suggestive smirk. He turned around and pulled you into his firm chest. His hands smoothed down your back and squeezed your hips, with his thumbs dragging under the hem of your pajama top.

While your lips threatened a smile, you had to wonder how he had enough energy for reunion sex, but not enough to watch a simple movie. 

Still, his offer was all-too tempting, making heat prickle along your skin wherever he touched. Nonetheless, you managed to remain stubborn and pushed gently against his chest.

“Down, boy,” you said. “If I let you get your hands on me now, I’ll never get through my list.”

First it was Love Actually, then Christmas Vacation, followed swiftly by Home Alone and its sequel, Lost In New York. 

Ben frowned at you. “So? Watch ‘em tomorrow.”

“In case you’ve forgotten, it’s Christmas Eve.”

You gestured to all your hard work in the form of the decorated apartment.

“Tomorrow, we have dinner at my mom’s house. So tonight, you’re gonna go shower," you said, pointing at him. "I’m going to make some more hot chocolate, and we’re watching all manner of cheesy, romantic, and downright silly Christmas movies until your Grinch-ass gets some holiday spirit.”

Ben released a tired sigh and dropped his hands away from you.

“I haven’t slept in three fucking days," he said. "I’m not staying up all night again for some corny bullshit.”

You frowned in disappointment. 

“Ben, come on. Please?” you tried, but he just waved a dismissive hand and continued his way to the bedroom.

For a moment, you watched him go in disbelief. Was he really going to be like that? 

With a flash of hot annoyance, you huffed and decided that you weren’t going to let him ruin the night for you. 

So you went into the kitchen and whipped up some hot cocoa, breaking out the actual Godiva chocolate bars you bought just for this moment. You poured out one mug initially. But you listened to the old water pipes working, knowing that Ben must’ve been taking a shower. 

You knew he wasn’t just tired. He didn’t seem to be looking forward to tomorrow either, and  was going along with it for your sake. Which, to be fair, could just mean he still wasn’t totally comfortable around your family. (Your sister Luisa still hadn’t totally warmed up to him.)

You also had a feeling that he just wasn’t into Christmas.

The question was why… 

But you poured a mug for him anyway, adding some mini marshmallows into each one. You brought both mugs with you back to the living room and set them down on the coffee table. 

Getting comfortable on the couch again, complete with your blanket, mug, and the popcorn bowl, you pressed “play” and continued watching the movie…even though you felt just a bit lonelier. 

But then, a weight dropped on the other end of the couch. You flinched and looked over at your now clean and pajama-clad boyfriend, who eyed you begrudgingly with his arms crossed over a soft plain shirt. 

You smiled at him warmly. “Hey, baby.”

His grouchy face was the very picture of “humbug.” Biting your lip, you set down the popcorn on the coffee table and handed him the spare cup of hot chocolate. 

“I made some for you,” you said. He gave you a brief nod and took a dutiful sip. But not even rich, chocolatey goodness could curb his sour mood as he stared blandly at the screen. 

You knew that face. That was his, I’ll do this for you, but I’m not gonna fucking like it—face. 

When he stifled a yawn, you knew that he hadn’t been lying. He really was tired. Sometimes you forgot that while Ben was all but indestructible, even he had his limits. Chasing that rogue supe across the country must’ve taken it out of him, even if he wouldn’t admit it. 

So you reached over and plucked the mug out of his hand. His brows knit together as he watched you set it down on the coffee table with yours. Then you grabbed his hand. 

“Come ‘ere,” you said, tugging him toward you. 

“What now?” he groused. 

“Just come on. Don’t bitch,” you teased. You guided him to lay across the couch, with his head pillowed in your lap. You grabbed an extra throw blanket off the back of the couch and draped it over him, making sure that it covered him up to his chest. 

“What am I, a damn kid?” he said. But you knew his griping had no real weight. Already he was humming deep with pleasure as your fingers carded through his soft brown hair. You let your nails drag lightly over his scalp, massaging his head. Your free hand stroked his cheek. 

Ben closed his eyes for a moment and let out a sigh through his nose. The movie continued to play, but you were no longer paying much attention. This was more important. 

When he opened his eyes again, they were drawn to the small, four-foot Christmas tree in the corner of the room, next to the TV. 

“That’s a poor fucking excuse for a tree,” he said. 

You frowned and followed his gaze. 

“I think it’s adorable,” you replied. And it was the only one you thought would fit in this cozy, but very narrow apartment. 

Ben’s arms crossed over his blanket.

“I’ll go tomorrow, find us a real fucking tree,” he said. 

Your frown deepened a little. “But I already decorated this one. All by myself, I might add.”

He eyed you then, a bit softer.

“All right, we’ll get a second one for the dining room,” he grumbled. “Getting the tree up is a man’s job anyway.”

You rolled your eyes at that. But you tried to see if there was anything deeper to read in his words. Not for the first time, you wondered how he’d spent his holidays in the past. No doubt with a lot of fanfare and celebrity parties during his hay day as Soldier Boy. You were more interested in his life before that.   

“I remember, my mom would run the show at Christmas,” Ben said.

You blinked down at him in surprise. Without knowing, he’d opened up on your exact curiosity. 

Or maybe he just knew you better than you thought.

“She’d have all the help in a damn tear around the house. Cooking, decorating, the whole nine yards. It was a perfect scene, like something out of a catalogue,” said Ben. “But getting the tree was always my dad’s job. His only job, really.”

You smiled and continued to listen with rapt attention. Your thumb continued to stroke along his neck. 

“One year, he got this massive one. Must’ve been…I don’t know, twenty feet. I don’t even know how he got it through the door, but he was mighty fucking proud of himself,” Ben said.

His gaze trailed beyond you, lost in faded memories. They played in his mind like a reel, wordless, but bright and warm. 

“Who decorated it?” you asked. Your voice drew his attention back. 

“Me and him,” Ben admitted, surprising you yet again. “Meanwhile, Mom baked up a storm for the Christmas party they threw every year…”

It was a rare moment where Ben recalled what seemed to be a nice memory of his father. But soon enough, the nostalgia dimmed from his eyes.

He cleared his throat and swiped a hand over his mouth, as if that could erase his moment of vulnerability. 

Then he turned to face the TV screen. 

“So what’s even happening here? Seems like there’s four goddamn movies playing at once.”

You cracked a smile and continued brushing your fingers through his hair. You also rewinded the movie so he could actually follow the story.

“Yeah, that’s what makes this movie so classic. See, there’s Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman. They’re married, kids, the perfect life, right? But he’s actually cheating on her with a younger, sluttier woman.”

“…And this is a fucking Christmas movie?”

“Yeah, you’ll see. Then there’s Liam Neeson.”

Ben perked up at that. “The Taken guy?” 

You nodded. “Yep! He’s a widower, but he has a stepson who’s got a sweet little crush. So he’s gonna try and help the kid impress the girl by helping him learn the drums.”

Your boyfriend nodded. 

“Musicians get plenty of pussy, that’s for damn sure,” he said. And with a knowing grin, “Actors get more though.”

You snorted and pointed to Hugh Grant next. “He’s my favorite. He’s playing the Prime Minister, who falls in love with his assistant, Natalie. That’s her right there.”

Ben raised a brow at your choice of “favorite.” If nothing else, he noted your type for older men. 

But he smirked when Natalie kept verbally fumbling in Hugh’s presence, then stared along with the Prime Minister at the woman’s ass when she walked away at the end of the scene.  

“Hmm, I’ll admit. She’s got a juicy peach,” Ben remarked. You laughed and hit his shoulder playfully. It worked an amused smile onto his face. 

He took your hand from his shoulder and pressed the back of it to his lips. You blinked down at him, and you warmed with a smile at seeing his more relaxed face. 

He kept your hand on his chest, his thumb drawing back and forth over your wrist. 

So you proceeded to explain the various angles of the movie until he was all caught up. 

You two watched the rest of it together. Like always, you cried when Colin Firth poured his heart out to his housekeeper, Aurélia, half in his mangled Portuguese and half in English. You cried again when Emma’s character finally confronted her cheating bastard husband. 

And you held your breath when Hugh and Natalie kissed as the stage curtain fell down, revealing their relationship to the world. 

By the time the credits rolled, you were an emotional mess. You were happy though. Typically you’d watch this movie with your sister, but it was nice to share the holidays with someone… 

Someone who loved you enough to curb his Grinch attitude about cheesy romantic things, like tree decorating and watching rom-coms with hot cocoa. 

You glanced down, and sure enough, Ben was asleep. He had turned onto his stomach. His head still rested in your lap, his cheek pillowed by your thigh, and he had a hand curled around your leg. Your big, growling bear of a man had a gooey center that sometimes surprised even you. 

For one mischievous moment, you considered sticking a piece of popcorn up his nose. 

He looked so damn peaceful that you didn’t want to ruin it…yet now you couldn’t get up either. 

Shit, you thought, but your grin was soft. Oh, whatever. Sleep is overrated.

You queued up Chevy Chase’s Christmas Vacation next in your movie marathon and settled in. You laid a gentle hand on Ben’s back, between his broad shoulders. 

And his story about his parents returned to the forefront of your mind.

Maybe he didn’t hate Christmas. Maybe it was just difficult for him to remember the genuinely good ones. Maybe he missed his parents; both of them, despite how contentious it had been between him and his father. 

You could certainly understand that. But now, you would make sure he would remember this one for the “good” column.

You only startled a little when your cell phone chimed on the coffee table. The screen read 12:00 a.m. It was officially December 25th. 

You then felt Ben’s warm hand squeeze your leg. His eyes were still shut though, his breathing deep and even in sleep. 

With a smile, you leaned down and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

And you whispered in his ear, “Merry Christmas, Ben.”

AN: Yay! I hope you liked this fluffy one for SB. 🎄❤️

Did you like Ben's little day trip down memory lane? Let me know in the comments! 😘

**Note: There will be two more parts to this due to popular request!

Keep Reading: PART 2

Soldier Boy Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Tag List:

@deans-spinster-witch @this-is-me19 @waynes-multiverse @mrsjenniferwinchester @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @spalady26 @spnwoman @syrma-sensei @wirdbeimaufhebengebunden @muhahaha303 @123passwort

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[hannahhook7744]

A light for nobody:

Requested by @captainthomasrobbie for my sad lyric/quote descendants writing challenge.

The Quote: Behind every sweet smile there is a bitter sadness noone can see or hear. It hurts to leave a light on for nobody.

The character: Chad Charming.

Trigger warning; child neglect, sadness, death, Cinderella and Kit being bad parents, etc.

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Behind every sweet smile there is a bitter sadness noone can see or hear.

It hurts to leave a light on for nobody.

Nobody knows this better than Chad charming.

He isn't the person most people would think of when they think of the word 'alone' or the word 'lonely' or the word 'unloved' but that was exactly what he was.

He hadn't always been that way, however.

Once when he was younger, he had, had it all.

A loving grandpa.

Loving staff in the form of Duke and Prudence.

Two loving uncles.

A loving fairy Godmother and her kids.

A loving aunt and four loving cousins.

3 loving mice.

A loving dog.

A loving horse.

A loving cat.

5 loyal and loving friends, and a sure way to college in the form of sports.

A loving little sister.

He had the world at his fingers as a child and hadn't even known it.

But as all things do, everything changed.

His uncle James was dragged off to the isle and then a few years down the line, Anastasia was too.

Then his grandpa died.

Then Prudence and Duke followed.

Then Fairy Godmother and Jacob started to notice just how much Chad stayed over, and started asking questions, and then he wasn't allowed to go over as often anymore because it upset his parents.

Which meant that he was trapped in the castle, left to notice just how often his parents took his younger sister out without even asking if he wanted to go.

Left to realize just how little his parents cared for him.

His friends started to drift away from him except for Audrey, leaving him to cling to what little remained of all their friendships.

Doug started to resent them.

Jane started to see a stranger.

Ben got busy.

Lonnie got tired of Auardon's bullshit.

Audrey got obsessed with Ben and her crush on him.

And Chad was left behind yet again.

He had to adapt or die, and adapt he did. Though not necessarily for the best.

He straightened his hair. Neglected his school work. Threw himself into his looks and sports, and began resenting his sick little sister who he knew his parents loved more.

He acted out, desperate for their attention. Good or bad.

He lashed out at his friends, driving them away further.

Chad was almost unrecognizable by middle school. The old him was gone and dead. Much to his uncle and Fairt Godmother's displeasure.

Audrey was his only confidante and was slowly spending more and more time with Ben, who soon became her boyfriend.

He became M.V.P of the swords and shields team, and the Tourney team. Colleges everywhere were looking at him, waiting for him to graduate and then the vks showed up.

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Behind every sweet smile there is a bitter sadness noone can see or hear.

It hurts to leave a light on for nobody.

Chad, at 18, wasn't proud of the person he became or how he acted towards the vks. But he knew that he couldn't change it.

And he knew that he'd never have his world back.

Now he had left the prince life behind and everything that came with it. Had vanished in the night to see how long it would take anyone to notice he was gone.

4 weeks.

It had taken 4 weeks and his 10 year old sister, Chloe, had been the one to notice when she had been reintroducing their aunt, Anastasia, and their cousins, and their uncle James (and his son Carlos) to the castle and everyone in it.

Chad knew then that he was never going to return.

Why would he when he wouldn't be missed?

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

It hurts to leave a light on for nobody.

Chad knew this still at 24 though the pain had lessened as he had come to expect it.

It had been 6 years since he had left home. Since he had left Auardon. And he had slowly but surely made a life for himself as something other than a wannabe trophy husband prince.

He had stopped straightening his hair and and had let it grown out.

He had built a beautful little cabin in the woods and lived alone with his many pets.

And as he sat in a rocking chair on his porch, staring out at the sun set, Diamond (his cat) in his lap. Swiggles (his dog) asleep at his feet.His mice (Dagger, Cobalt, and Starlet) rocking in their own chairs across on his side, squeaking at his white horse, Colonel...

Gil chopping wood in the front yard.

Chad thought that maybe, just maybe.. it wasn't all bad. And that maybe. Just maybe... this could turn into something more.

[faillicya]

This isn't an art request I'm just curious! Which pastas know each other in your canon?

—Great question, thank you for asking!

So first of all, I could go on and on about the various dynamics. I was about to write a full-on essay, but I realise that it would take way too long, for a simple question. If you want more details about a certain relationship, don't hesitate to ask, I would love to talk about it! :)

( Bloody Painter and Puppeteer are also missing, I haven't figured them out yet. This HC is subject to change, for now, it will do.)

Jeff & Liu —

Liu wants his brother back and convinces him to stop his mindless killing, but Jeff is resentful, he doesn't want to remember or connect to anything of his past. In his mind, his brother is dead. The only reason why Jeff didn't kill Liu yet is because Sully always gets in the way.

Liu & Jane —

Liu feels pity for Jane, but because their goals are opposite they do not get along. Sully feel different toward Jane, he doesn't feel bad for her, but he does have some level of respect for her. On the other hand, Jane just thinks Liu is an imbecile for running after Jeff.

Jane & Jeff —

Jane hates Jeff deeply, I don't believe I need to mention why. Jeff is more amused by her tentative at killing him, he could have killed her many times, but in the end it creat a source of entertainment for him.

Jeff The Killer & Eyeless Jack—

Jack was starving, he made a mistake with managing his stock of meat, and he wasn't even able to go out since it was daytime. He crossed paths with one of Jeff targets in an abandoned building where he was living. Jack devour them without a second taught, and Jeff witnesses the whole scene with his very own eye.

Jeff The Killer & Ben Drowned —

Ben previous victim had buried his game far from electricity and technological device, so he was trapped there, his spirit buried deep underground. Eventually, Jeff walked near Ben location and out of despair, made contact with him. Jeff has never come across a supernatural entity, so he helped him out after some taught.

Jeff The Killer & Masky —

They were both arrested around the same time and happened to be sent to the same asylum. Masky blunt personality peeked Jeff interest, they both planed an escape, succeed, and went back on their respective track.

Masky & Hoody —

Hoody personality has almost completely taken over Brian. He's neutral and at the same time aggressive toward Masky. Tim feels bad for Brian, but at this point, have lost all hope that Brian would even come to normal.

Slenderman & Hoody —

Has completely ruined him mentally, he's at his complete order, what is left of Brian is insignificant. Even if he could come back, he would be too scared to fight back.

Slenderman & Masky —

He's much more rebellious than Hoody, Tim is still there, somewhere. He hates Slenderman but has no choice but to obey him. If he dares to fight back, his life will be on the line.

Slenderman & The Rake —

Slenderman try to tame it for his profit, failed, try to lock it in the basement, almost killed Masky, try to lock it in a cage, the creature broke the door and escaped. Slenderman will catch him, eventually.

Slenderman & Laughing Jack —

Slenderman try to blackmail Jack into working with him, but I never found a reason good enough, he tries to manipulate him, but you can't fool an old clown. Jack knows better but to avoid this entity at all cost.

Slenderman & Eyeless Jack —

The tall being has been observing the demon for a while. Slenderman want's E.J. as his proxy, but Jack think differently. He wants nothing to do with Slenderman. Slenderman is just waiting for the right moment.

Slenderman & Zalgo —

Very tense conflict. A direct fight could cause the end of both parties. This is the main reason they are enemies because they are a mutual threat to each other.

Candy Pop & Laughing Jack —

Candy respect Jack craftsmanship, but he doesn't understand him as a person or his motive, although he never cared to find out.

Laughing Jack finds Candy Pop annoying. Jack prefer to be alone and having this loud-mouthed individual bothering him just irritates him.

Laughing Jack & Sally Williams —

The clown hates her to no end, many times she got in his way, trying to save children, and since she's a ghost, there wasn't much he could do. Sally on the other end, despite the clown. In the end, they mostly avoid each other.

Jason The Toymaker & Laughing Jack —

They accidentally target the same prey, turned out poorly and are now consider enemies. They did have a few decent encountering after this, Jack does understand Jason loneliness but at the same time find him foolish and naive.

[autisticandroids]

before we begin this post is about lisa so let's get that out of the way. anyway one thing about me is that i tend to read the really bad things dean does to those around him as not just an expression of his control issues and his objectification of the people around him, but also like. unconscious expressions of deep-seated resentment.

like this is reasonably canonical with sam - dean does resent sam, that's explicit. he's spent his whole life having to take care of sam, and has no identity outside of this. and this isn't sam's fault - in childhood, it was john's fault, and then once john was gone, dean kept them both locked in that pattern because it was all he knew and he didn't know how to get out, or who he would be if he did. and he resents sam for all sorts of reasons in adulthood, too. like he resents sam for getting out of their family, and for leaving him, and for wanting to leave him and be free, for not loving him enough, for making decisions that dean later had to clean up the consequences of, etc. etc. etc. whether all of this is true or not, it's what dean believes, and what dean resents sam for.

i think it's reasonable to say he resents cas, for similar but very different reasons, as well as some other reasons. like he resents cas because he feels responsible for cas (because he sees cas as a child) and cas is constantly fucking up. he resents cas because he gets angry with cas but still cares about him, so he resents the fact that he still has to maintain a relationship with someone that he's angry at (because he loves them). he resents the fact that cas forgives him for things, which makes him feel like a tool when he's mean. i think you could even argue that he resents the fact that he desires cas, because he doesn't want to, even though i think that's less evident from the text.

he resents mary because (again this is more explicit) having her around as a real person destroys the perfect motherfantasy that he was raised on, and also because he feels like her presence should restore the comfort and safety of his childhood, but it doesn't. like he wants to yield the title of head of the family to her so that he doesn't have to run things anymore, but he also literally wants to go back to being a four year old child who never lost his mom and was never abused by his dad and etc. etc. etc., and she both refuses to give him the first and is incapable of giving him the second.

he resents lisa (and lisa-and-ben) because he feels trapped and unhappy in his relationship with her, both because he promised sam to get with her and because he feels like his relationship with her is something he should want, even though he doesn't.

(i don't think jack fits into this model because i wouldn't call dean's feelings towards him "love poisoned by resentment" in the way that's true of the others. they're more suspicion and dislike and even hatred eventually tempered by affection.)

and like. none of this is rational. and if dean spelled it out to himself he would recognize that it isn't rational. but it's like entirely unconscious. this is the logic his emotionbrain is working off, not his reasonbrain.

and i think that whenever he does something terrible to one of these people like, for their own good/to keep them on the straight and narrow, it is mostly because he doesn't really see them as full adults/humans (mary is kind of exempt from this because he sort of sees her as an equal. i don't know if he ever does anything particularly bad to her for these reasons), and because he needs to control everything, and because he doesn't really perceive his family members as separate from himself, and because he believes in preserving family over everything, and because he doesn't want to be alone, and all of that. but he also does it as a covert expression of his resentment. he is hurting them on purpose, because they've hurt him. he doesn't know he's hurting them on purpose, he doesn't think that's what he's doing, but in some back corner of his mind it is.

anyway this is why i could never get into deanlisa.

[ponderosus]

layla didn't exactly resent benj as much as she might have that many years ago, rather just offered no sympathy. she found no reason to soften her words to make him feel any better. the facts were the facts. "can't say that five years ago i wouldn't of been thrilled to know i could make you hyper aware of your actions while trapped in a metal box." a bout of laughter escapes layla lips, shaking her head. the comment comes out as a joke, however it's very true. the universe must have known the only way to get a serial denialist to deal with his actions was in a confined space. "i'm not trying to be mean to you, ben. it's just the truth." a shrug rolls off her shoulders, "whether you agree, or care, is your business."

@benj-hyun

That he did, Ben cannot and will not argue. It'd been a selfish choice, nothing can be said to change the very nature of it. "Maybe while not trapped in a metal box?" That'd been the worst part of it, but he just figures it's karma really getting him this time. It's easier to let her negative feelings roll off his shoulders when he can make a run for it.

He leans up against the wall, arms crossed defensively over his chest, and he shrinks into himself. Trying to make himself smaller, lessen his presence as if that would save him from anything else to be said.

"Oh. Thank Christ," he sighs out in relief. "I feel like I can breathe now."

@ponderosus

[strangermarvelss]

breathe- p.p

Pairing: Ex!Peter Parker x Female!Reader

Summary- Peter was just outed as Spider-man and has no idea what to do

Warnings- angst, panic attacks, fluff in the end, please don’t read if any of this is triggering towards you

Word Count- 1.8k

A/N: hello all! Idk why but I feel as if I am catching up on the ideas I’ve had since the last time I’ve written anything and catching up on where the MCU left off. Plus the No Way Home trailer being released gave me extra motivation. Enjoy! -sava

“Spider-man’s real name in Peter Parker!” Mysterio’s voice booms as the video clip played on multiple screens in Times Square. 

You brought your hand over your mouth, gasping harshly. Peter’s identity was just exposed, and you felt like the entire world just stopped. You had just saw him and MJ swinging through the city as you were walking to the MoMA with Betty, taking a cut through Times Square since you loved watching people fall for that tourist trap. But in that moment, you could only think about Peter, and how he was feeling and what he was doing to take this all in.

“Oh my god! Peter is Spider-man?” Betty exclaims, looking to you, then looking up at Peter, who was perched up on a light, looking as if he was freaking out. You heart clenched looking at him up there, knowing how he was anxious a lot, especially after everything with Uncle Ben, and now with Mr. Stark. You knew how important it was to keep is identity a secret, and now that it has not only been revealed, but Mysterio made him out to be a criminal, which you and all his friends knew was a lie. You also knew that Peter’s stress was at an all time high.

Yeah, the two of you haven’t been a couple since everyone got snapped back and Peter “needed time to himself”, which lead to him immediately getting with MJ on the trip a few months later, you still felt for him. You were his girlfriend for two years, and best friends ever since the 5th grade. Yes, you resented him for breaking up with you and having to watch him chase after MJ all through your trip to Europe, but seeing the news break now about his identity pushed those feeling out of the way, as the only thing you could think about doing is comforting Peter, since he was still your best friend.

“Do you think Ned knows? Or MJ? I bet that’s why they’re swinging away right now! OMG, Y/N, did you know?! You’re Peter’s best friend, who am I kidding, of course you knew!” You hear Betty ramble. 

“Look Betty, I really have to go check on Peter, I’m sorry to cancel on our plans. Can we go to MoMA some other time?” You ask, your voice sounding rushed and panicked. She nods and you silently thanked her with a nod, taking off down the street towards Queens.

You try to call Peter probably 40 times as you made your way back to your apartment. You text him more than enough times too, telling him to meet you there. You knew going to his apartment was probably the worst idea, as May was probably freaking out and Peter seeing May upset and scared would just put even more pressure and hurt onto him, and the cops might be on their way to his apartment to look for him and bring him in for questioning, which he didn’t need right now.

As you got into the elevator of your apartment, you let out a big sigh. You knew Peter was going to be safe no matter where he was, and hopefully he would see all your notifications about telling him to meet you here at your place, since he always knew it was a safe haven, no matter the circumstance. The two of you spent countless nights at your place, when you were little, and when you were dating. He would rant about the stresses of Spider-man or vent about his grief towards Uncle Ben, and you would always listen and be there for him however he needed.

You unlock your front door and closed it slowly, letting your back press on the cold wood. Your mother and father weren’t home, as it was the middle of the work day and wouldn’t be back until 6 or 7, depending on traffic and how late they needed to stay. You throw your purse onto the couch in your living room and rub your face carefully, trying not to rub the makeup off with your frustration. You swing into the hall and make your way to the end, turning to your bedroom and opening the door, a scream accompanying.

“Oh my god, Peter!” You scream, rushing into your room and shutting the door quickly behind you. The curtains were drawn already, which you knew was his doing. Your lamp on your bedside table was on, letting some light into the dark room. You noticed that Peter’s mask was off and his head was in his hands, visibly shaking. You kneeled down by your bed where he was, rub his arm, trying to comfort him.

“Y-your window was unlocked, so I-I hope that was okay,” he says, breath shaky. You sigh and look at him. He’s never been like this before, not even when Uncle Ben died. This was this most distraught and nervous you have ever seen him, and it only hurt you more. 

“That’s okay Peter. I’m glad you got my messages,” you say, trying to sound as cheerful and hopeful as possible. He looked up at you with tear filled eyes, still shaking and breathing heavy. 

“Peter, are you okay? Can I do anything to help you right now?”

“I-um-I…I don’t know. I can’t b-believe that this is h-happening,” he try to make you, his breathing becoming heavier. You see that tears are coming out of his eyes as he continues to breathe harder, his chest rising and falling at a rapid pace and a look of panic plastered on his face. You get up and sit beside him, rubbing his back to try and somewhat soothe him. 

“Peter, try to breathe for me okay? Try to get your breathing back to normal okay?” 

“I-I can’t Y/N..I’m just so-“ he began to say, his arms moving in circles as he tries to talk, but can’t formulate the words. You turn his head to you and start to breathe slowly, inhaling and exhaling. 

“Try to match my breathing Peter. In, and out. In, and out” You explain to him, demonstrating the pattern of breathing for him. You see him try, tears still streaming down his face. You continue to breathe with him, holding him as he does so. You wipe away a few tears, trying to get him to clear his mind and come back to the regular, less stressed Peter you knew so well. You notice his breathing is starting to regulate more, making your heart not clench as much.

Seeing Peter this stressed and in this much pain always made you sad, if not equally sad. You two have been through so much together, between your friendship and your relationship, the biggest being snapped away together and no longer existing for five whole years, really shakes people up. It was weird coming back and not immediately seeing Peter, but you knew he went with Stark to help defeat Thanos, so the job needed to be finished. 

Pulled back into reality, Peter’s breathing was back to it’s usual pace, his chest not working so hard to accompany the extra work his lungs were doing. You smiled a little, sighing as a sign that he would try to relax a little. He rested his head on your shoulder and you ran your hand through his hair. 

“Tell me what to do Y/N. How do I get through this?” He asks you, looking straight ahead.

“I know this is going to come out as a shock, but, for once in my life, I don’t have the answers for everything,” he explained to him playfully, trying to lighten the mood a bit. You heard him chuckle softly.

“I’m really sorry all of this is happening to you Peter,” you say softly. 

“It’s not your fault, Y/N.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t feel sympathy or empathy for you,” you say, turning your head towards him. He lifts him head from your shoulder and turns to face you. His eyes are red and puffy from all the crying, his face looking stressed with the redness. Peter sighs, getting up from the bed and starting to pace a little.

“I just don’t know how any of this happened. He’s dead! When did he even record all of this, I was with him the whole time!” He started to exclaim. You noticed his breathing was starting to pick up again and started to panic yourself.

“Peter, okay, try to relax. Try to walk yourself through it without working yourself up too much, okay? You explain to him, trying to remain calm so he matches your energy.

You see Peter stop and take a deep breath, letting it out slowly as he rests his hands on his hips, his head pointed down. He tilts his head back up, looking at the ceiling as he lets out another deep breath. 

“I was with him on the bridge, the whole time, until he died. I checked to see he was gone…I don’t know how he could’ve recorded that message,” he tells you calmly.

“You said he was a master of manipulation, right? Did he use any illusions on you while you were on the bridge?” You ask him. You seem his demeanor change, as if a lightbulb went off in his head.

“Yeah…yeah he did! I had to use my Peter tingle- I mean, spidey sense, to get through it, maybe he did it during that time!” He shouts, anger starting to come out. He turns to you and notices you trying to be calm still, and tries to come back down from his anger high. 

“Okay, that’s some progress. That’s good,” you say, trying to be as optimistic as possible. You send him a small smile and he just looks at you.

“What?”

“Thank you Y/N, I appreciate you helping me today, it means a lot. But I know what I have to do next,” he says, confidence dripping out in his voice.

“And what is that, Spider-man?”

“Well first, I have to go check on May, because I know she’s freaking out right now,” he pauses, taking a second to regain his thoughts as you see sadness appear on his face. “Then, I have to go to the police, and try to clear my name. I don’t know how I’m going to do it, but I have to try” he explains to you. You nod, silently signaling that it’s all a good idea. 

You didn’t know how he was going to do it either. The video is evidence against him, which definitely won’t help him. But no matter what, you know that you, and Ned, MJ, May, and a lot of other people will be there to support Peter no matter what it takes, or whatever the outcome of going to the police to try and get his name cleared. But you did know, that he needed a backup plan as well, better to be safe than sorry.

“And if that doesn’t work?” You ask.

“I have another plan.”

[skyesu]

Your takes on the pastas are really cool, especially for ben and BEN, pretty interesting way of having both canon and fanon designs included in the art! Do you have any headcanons for the pastas personalities?

Aaagh thank you!! I did separate Ben & BEN to represent Ben the actual kid & BEN the program but having originally designed Kid Ben in like. 7th-8th grade???? He is the more fanon-y out of the two of them.

AND IM SO GLAD U ASKED ABT THWIR PERSONALITIES Dude. Dude

- Natalie is a diagnosed psychopath & is very blunt, rash, violent and ridiculing, basically ur classic creepypasta boye. She is v flirtatious too in certain settings but it’s impossible to tell if she means it or not lmao. She’s unleashed a lot of her repressed anger already since running away & has mellowed out a bit—she can even grow to care for certain people, tho it takes a lot of time & a lot of trial and error for her to begin caring in an “acceptable” way.

- Jeff is very Tired. That’s like the most concise way I can describe it. He’s schizophrenic and has trauma-induced BPD which can make him seem very volatile and destructive, when really they’re both incidental to him being a killer. He kills mostly for survival and while not outright violent off the bat, is usually very dismissive of others and would rather be left alone. Needless to say this causes Problems when he comes across someone he actually ends up liking

- Jack might be the most well-adjusted out of all of them, besides maybe Ben?? He’s very snarky and resigned, kind of like a more peppy Jeff but he has way more refined social skills and would be pretty open to others if not for his.,predicament. Which is he kind of needs to be a cannibal to live. He distances himself from a lot of the bad things he does and dismisses them as “part of the job” or “just survival,” both of which are true but..you can only have so many excuses buddy

- Ben (kid version) is actually pretty normal!! But like the others, he’s pretty resigned to his station by now (being dead AND trapped in a shitty little n64 cartridge) and is also very used to being passed around like a hot potato that nobody really wants to be stuck with—so abandonment issues on that end as well!! But even so, he’s usually very “”chill”” and tries to be a good person and friend, though is gripped by the fear that he’ll end up hurting someone he cares about (as has happened before).

- BEN (evil evil dude) is the thing Ben is afraid will hurt people. It’s his “”other half,”” as Ben calls it, or even “that thing” but it resents those labels a bunch because it believes it has just as much of a right to be residing in Ben’s soul as he does. It’s very chaotic, manipulative, & maniacal and rarely shows any true emotional depth when toying with victims, though if you say the right (extremely hurtful) things it will be caught off guard and be genuinely upset. Which isn’t much better because it will actually want to kill you so maybe don’t try that