#and ava's back so they get their happy ending

[simplykorra]

in this life

[th3-c0ll3ct3r]

My Tumblr followers. If and when you see this. Just don't look at twitter man

This year is cooked

Sorry for the vent but omg this year man THIS YEAR UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (read tags for context)

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

time

Summary: Not wanting to face Joel after you found out that you're pregnant, you leave the Boston QZ to live with Bill and Frank. Almost four years pass before you can't hide from him anymore, letting him finally know why you ran from him all these years back.

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem. reader

Wordcount: 6.7k

Rating: E

Warnings: angst, unplanned pregnancy, secret pregnancy, secrets, fluff, trust issues, Joel being Joel, making up, kissing, age gap (not specified but it's around 15 years), smut (unprotected sex), mentions of alcohol, Joel really is bad at feelings, but he's trying, Girl Dad Joel Miller, happy end

A/N: if these two had a relationship status it would be "it's complicated" Another WiP done! So now I am allowed to think about Biker Raider Joel for a moment, right?

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Pedro Masterlist || Joel Masterlist || Main Masterlist

“You know you’ll have to face him at some point,” Frank had a fond smile on his lips as he sat in his wheelchair next to you. He was watching Bill who let himself chase across the yard of his picture perfect post apocalypse home. 

Nobody would expect that just down the street, outside of the fence the world as you knew it had ended. 

“I know,” you sighed. 

“He asks for you every time he’s here. If we had seen you, if we knew where you are. He’s gonna understand,” Frank said and you scoffed. 

“He’s not gonna care. He has Tess and… he’s not…” you shook your head, searching for the words, “he’s not the man I fell in love with.”

“We all can change,” Frank said, reaching over to squeeze your hand. 

“Bill is the best example for that. Could you have imagined him like that when you showed up here three years ago?”

You watched Bill play with your daughter, Ava, playing catch. 

“Joel is not like that. He was like that. Before. But that part of him died long ago.”

You sat in silence for a while, just watching Bill and Ava, trying to soak it all in. It would never be like that again and you were already dreading having to explain all of this to her. 

“I’m gonna miss you,” you whispered, fighting against the tears as you looked at Frank. He smiled softly at you before he came closer, kissing your forehead. 

Four years earlier

You knew he could tell when you were lying. He would know with one look at you that you were full of shit telling him that this was not working for you anymore. Whatever this between you was.

Joel and you had known each other since before the outbreak. You had started babysitting Sarah to earn some extra money while you were finishing you degree when she had just been nine years old and you had moved in next door.

You had been there on outbreak day. Next door, still living at home to take care of your sick father. You would never get the picture of his infected body lunging at you out of your head the night the world changed. 

You and Joel… You didn’t know what Joel and you were exactly. 

You loved Joel, you knew that. And you were pretty sure he loved you too. You just wanted… more. Most people did not allow themselves to love so openly anymore. And in Joel’s case? Losing Sarah had changed him. After fifteen years the man who had been Sarah’s father was gone, replaced by a man that still had his face, but was missing the warmth and comfort Joel Miller had once provided. 

You could see it in glimpses, whenever his hand would rest on your back when he passed by. When he fell asleep in your arms deep in the night. When he kissed your forehead before he headed out for work. 

Loving Joel Miller was easy. 

Being loved by him was close to impossible. 

You never really labelled your relationship, mostly because you did not think of it as important. You trusted him more than any other person on this planet. It’s why you ignored the way he had started looking at Tess. It’s why you did not question him when he stayed away at night. You ignored it all, opening your arms for him when he chose to come home to you, letting him in your bed just to feel close to him. To feel something. 

The jealousy was killing you slowly, making you reckless when you let him have his way with your body. 

But once you had missed your period the first month, and then the second, you knew that there was only one possible answer to your dilemma. You had never been late before. A ration card swapped for a twenty year old pregnancy test had your worst fears come true. 

You were pregnant with Joel Miller’s child. 

Fifteen years after you both buried his daughter. The daughter he never got over losing. 

You could already see his reaction. The eyes you loved so much empty before he would tell you to deal with it. 

You could not face his anger or disappointment, but mostly you could not face him not caring. So you packed your little belongings once he had left you in the morning, sneaking out of your bed without a word.

You did not leave a note, just fled the QZ, making your way over to Bill and Frank, hoping your friendship with Frank would make them take you in. 

Of course Bill hadn’t want to, but once he saw your stomach swell (and tasted the sweets you baked in his kitchen) he had put all his work into making the house next door into your home. 

“Mama, can we go get Strawbebbies?” you chuckled, holding her hand as you walked with her on your daily walk by the fence. 

“Strawberries, baby,” you tried to correct her. Ava pouted at you, her dark curls swinging in the wind, her brown eyes so much like her fathers. 

“That’s what I said!” she put her little hands on her hips and you smiled. 

She was definitely her father’s daughter.

“Okay, baby. Let’s get some Strawbebbies,” you picked her up, making her shriek with laughter. Once again you were glad you made the decision to come here. She could grow up like a child was supposed to. 

Even though now that Bill and Frank were gone it was getting kind of lonely. You had all enjoyed a last dinner together before Bill and Frank had tucked Ava in for one last time and read her a story. 

You had tried to keep the tears at bay as Bill had reminded you of the folder full of instructions of how to take care of things around here for you. 

After dinner you had walked them to the gate, opening the fence for them as they took their last walk. You had watched them until they had disappeared into the dark woods before you made your way back to their house. You had cleaned the dishes and tidied everything up, before with a heavy heart, you had turned off all the lights and closed the door behind you before you walked to your house, allowing yourself to cry yourself to sleep as you sat on the floor next to the bed of your daughter, watching her sleep. 

That night was almost three months ago. The days were getting shorter, the nights colder. You’d have enough firewood for this winter but come spring you would have to find a way to make more. 

You had just finished making breakfast for Ava when the motion detector alarmed you that someone was at the gate. You froze, telling Ava to eat her fruit salad before you made your way downstairs to check out what was happening. 

Your heart was pounding against your chest, once you noticed his face. 

Joel Miller. 

And a…. Teenage girl?

The gate swung open after he put in the code and you allowed yourself fifteen seconds to panic. You knew this day would come. The day after Bill and Frank had gone you had checked the basement, finding that Bill had put on 80’s music, the distress signal. 

Even though you had turned it off immediately deep down you knew he would show up at some point. 

You just did not think it would be that soon. 

You grabbed your gun, checking if it was loaded before you made your way back upstairs. You did not think you would need it, but it was better to be prepared. 

“Ava? Remember when Uncle Bill played hide and seek with you and showed you the best place to hide?” you asked, hiding the gun in the back of your jeans as you got to your kitchen. She nodded. 

“I want you to hide there until I come and get you,” you said. 

“Hide?” she asked. You nodded, kissing her cheek. 

“Take Sluggi with you,” you smiled. Sluggi was the stuffed plush slug Bill had gotten for her. She nodded and ran out of the kitchen and upstairs, You heard her door to her room close and took a deep breath, calming yourself. 

You knew this day would come. You knew one day you would have to face Joel Miller and you knew you would have to face his reaction. 

You never regretted your decision to leave. Life has definitely been better here. That did not mean you had just stopped loving him, no matter how much he had hurt you in the past. 

Stepping towards your front door you could see him walk towards Bill and Frank’s house. 

You closed your eyes, taking a calming breath before you opened the door and stepped out. 

His head snapped towards you once he heard the door opening, eyes widening for a split second before he pulled the girl that was with him behind his back. 

He was protecting her. 

“What are you doing here? Where are Bill and Frank?” he asked, his voice low. 

“They’re dead. Frank got worse and… he couldn’t…” you shook your head, lost of words. He just looked at you before he shook his head, trying to put in words what he wanted. 

“I just… We need some…” he took a deep breath, looking up at you, a million emotions playing over his face. 

“Are you hungry?” you asked the girl behind him. 

“Starving,” she replied and you smiled a little.

“There’s some fruit salad left on the kitchen counter if you want?” you asked. She stepped around Joel and he looked at her. 

“It’s safe. There’s… there’s no one there,” you lied. He gave her a nod before she walked past you into your home. 

It had been years since you’ve been alone with him. He did not really change. His hair maybe a little grayer, the lines around his mouth a little deeper, but he was still Joel Miller. 

“You left,” he said. 

“I did.”

“Why?”

You took a deep breath. You looked past him towards the house the girl had walked in, hoping your little girl continued to hide. Knowing her she had was working on her puzzle. She would be okay for a moment. 

You knew she was safe. You just needed a little moment alone. 

“You can have some fruit salad too. I am going to get some vegetables for dinner,“ you gave him a nod, before you turned around and walked towards your garden, ignoring him as he called after you. 

With a basket full of salad, cucumbers and some tomatoes you pushed the door of your house open. Joel was sitting on the stairs, across the door, already looking at you. 

The girl walked past the both of you towards the living room, an apple in her hand she was munching on. 

„This is so fucking weird,“ she shook her head and you snorted while Joel hissed at her. 

„What? It is weird,“ she said, her head turned towards him. 

You smiled a little as you looked at her, before you walked towards the kitchen, setting the basket down. You had to go up to check on Ava. 

And you had to talk to Joel.

You couldn’t hide her from him, even though you wanted to do nothing more than that. 

You took a deep breath when he walked into the kitchen. 

„Is it okay if Ellie takes a shower?“ He asked, knowing that there was warm water around town. 

„That’s her name. Ellie,“ he clarified.

„Oh. Of course, yeah,“ you nodded and Ellie walked in, snorting as she looked up at Joel. 

„You could use one too dude,“ she said and you had to fight hard against the grin as you watched the look on Joel’s face. 

You were about to offer her to show her to the bathroom when you heard a door upstairs click open, followed from little footsteps, your eyes widening. Joel frowned, his hand immediately searching for his gun, his arm putting Ellie behind himself. 

He raised his gun, taking a step forward as you ran around the counter, the knife you had put out to cut the salad now in your hand. 

„Gun down,“ you hissed and his head snapped to you, his eyes widening when he saw the knife in your hand. You stood in front of him. 

„I will not repeat myself, put the gun down, right now or I will put this knife in your thigh,“ you fingers flexed around the handle of the knife. The footsteps came closer as you kept eye contact with Joel until he slowly lowered his gun. You nodded at him once you saw him put the gun back to wherever it came from, then looked at Ellie who was looking at you with wide eyes, before you let the knife fall down to the floor just in time as Ava jumped the last step down, rounding the corner. 

„Potty?“ She whispered shyly, looking up at you with big eyes and you sighed, before you nodded, the people behind you forgotten as you picked your daughter up. You risked a glance at Joel as you turned towards the stairs, your daughter in your arms.

His lips parted as if he wanted to say something, before you practically ran up the stairs. 

„Who is the man mommy?“ Ava asked as she was finished, washing her hands like you taught her, making as many bubbles as possible as she rubbed her hands together. 

You sucked your bottom lip in as you watched her, your hand brushing over her soft hair. 

„That is an old Friend of mommy,“ you explained, and she nodded. 

„And the girl?“ She asked. 

„That is a friend of him, I think. I am not sure.“

She finished washing her hands and you handed her the towel, her little face full of concentration as she dried her hands, making you smile.

You got down on your knees in front of her, your hands on her shoulders. 

„Do you think she’s gonna play with me?“ She asked, hopeful.

„We can ask her,“ you said with a smile.

You weren’t prepared for the sight in your kitchen when you came downstairs. Joel was standing at the counter, the sleeves of his shirt rolled back as he cut the tomatoes with the knife you had threatened with him not only ten minutes ago. 

He didn’t look up as you entered the room, but Ellie did. You looked between them warily. 

„I’m Ava,“ your daughter chirped and you took a deep breath, Joel still not looking up. Ellie looked at him with a frown, before she sighed, rolling her eyes, and walked towards you.

„I’m Ellie,“ she said and smiled a little and bend down to her knees. Ava looked first at her, then at you. 

„Ellie, do you like sea turtles?“ You asked and the girl looked at you. 

„Uh…. I guess?“ She said and you smiled. 

„Because Ava loves them. Her whole room is full of them,“ you said and saw interest flicker in her eyes.

„Can I see?“ Ellie asked and you nodded. 

„You wanna show Ellie your sea turtles?“ You asked Ava and she nodded eagerly. 

„Awesome,“ Ellie said, taking Ava’s hand before you could offer to show them, the girls already walking upstairs towards Ava's room. 

Which left you alone in the kitchen with….

„How old is she?“ Joel asked, still not looking at you as you turned to face him. He grabbed the cucumber after he had used the knife to put the tomatoes in the bowl you had prepared for the salad, beginning to slice them. 

You took a deep breath. 

„She turned three last month,“ you said, watching him nod slowly, the knife hitting the cutting board the only noise in the room. 

„She has my eyes,“ he finally said and you sucked your bottom lip in, nervous. 

„Yeah she has,“ you agreed and he finally looked up at you, setting the knife down, his hands spread out on the counter, resting his whole weight on them. 

„Why didn’t you tell me?“ He asked, his voice quiet. 

„I didn’t know how. Joel…. You were barely acknowledging me outside of when you were inside of me. You spend all your time with Tess doing god knows what. How would you have reacted if I told you that I was pregnant? You never even acknowledged what we…“ you stoped yourself, shaking your head. 

„You should have told me. I could have…“ he stopped himself, searching for what to say and you looked at him, waiting. 

„I could have helped you. I would have….“ He shook his head, his hands shaking. 

„I’m gonna need a moment. Can you watch after Ellie?“ He asked and you nodded, confused and he nodded back before he walked past you and out of the house. 

You just didn’t think it would be almost two days before he got back. You were outside in Bill’s garden, letting the girls help you pick everything that was ready from the garden when you noticed him walk towards the house. 

You knew he was still inside the little locked up town Bill had made his safe haven. None of the alerts had went off, indicating he had left. And yeah you could have searched after him, but what good would it have done?

You’ve known him from almost twenty years, and you knew that he needed time to process certain things. 

He hadn’t talked to anyone in almost a year after the outbreak and what happened to Sarah. 

„Look what the cat dragged in,“ Ellie said as she spotted him and Ava perked up, her little head turning towards where Ellie was looking. 

Joel nodded at the girls before he looked at you. 

The sun was already setting and you had dinner prepared inside. 

„How about we have some dinner and then Ellie can read you some more of the story you started yesterday?“ You asked and both girl smiled at you. Ava ran past Joel who looked after her as she disappeared into the house, Ellie following her. 

„Next time you ditch me, at least tell me?“ She glared at him before she walked back into the house. He sighed, running a hand through his messy hair. 

„Can we talk?“ He asked. 

„After dinner?“ You said, getting up and grabbing the basked full of fresh vegetables. 

„Yeah. Yeah okay,“ he nodded and you walked towards the house, giving him a hesitant smile when he grabbed the basket from you and walked inside after you. 

It was two hours later that you found yourself on the left corner of your couch, your legs tucked under you, a glass of wine in your hand. 

Because this conversation needed some alcohol. 

And not only because of what you were about to talk about, but because of the man who was sitting on the other side of the couch, similar glass of wine in his hand. 

Because he looked so damn good.

He had showered while you put the girls to bed after dinner, the whole scene feeling so domestic. Like a dream you had many many times before when you were still dreaming. 

Dreaming of a normal future. 

Dreaming of a normal life. 

Dreaming about how it would feel like if Joel Miller loved you back. 

Because no matter how much he may have hurt you in the past, you just could not stop loving him. 

„I’m sorry,“ he whispered after a while and you turned your head to look at him, his eyes already on you. 

„I’m shit at talking about those things….“ He stopped.

„Those things meaning feelings?“ You helped and he groaned. 

„Yeah. Always sucked at it. Even before….“ 

He sighed. 

„Sarah would be so angry with me with how I treated you,“ he whispered and your eyes softened. You could count on one hand how often he had brought Sarah up ever since she died. 

And while you thought you could understand him in the past, you loved her like yours after all, now that you had Ava, you realised that loosing her would kill you. 

It would be something you could never come back from. 

But he did. 

„I never cheated on you. I know you thought I did, can’t blame your for it. Tess was just…. Fuck, how do I explain this?“ He sighed, his fingers rubbing over his chin. 

„I never deserved you. You’re too fucking good for me. For everyone really. Because even after the whole world went to shit, you still had some kindness left for everyone around you. I know how much you hated what we did in the beginning. And I hated myself for putting you through it. I hated myself for putting you through everything I did to you since the moment Sarah died…“ he said and you could see his eyes watering. 

„Can’t blame you for hating me and leaving. And not telling me about….“

„Joel….“ You said, setting your glass down and getting closer towards him, your hand reaching for his. Slowly he turned his hand so you could put yours in it, his fingers wrapping around your hand softly. 

„I’m not gonna lie and tell you that it’s okay. Cause I was hurting. You were hurting me. Every time you left in the morning without a word. Every time you passed out drunk and drugged after you came back. It was like living with a ghost and it was killing me. That was the reason I decided to leave when I found out. I could…. I couldn’t bring a child into this. And I knew I wanted her before I even met her. Even though it seems crazy to bring a child into this world. But… She was half you. And the thought that there was even the possibility that you didn’t wanted her….“ You took a deep breath. 

„Honestly? I can’t tell you how I would have reacted. I was… I was really fucked up in the weeks before you left. I was taking too many drugs. Drank too much. Got too fucking reckless. But that changed when you left,“ he said and squeezed your hand. 

„Not right away. It might have gotten worse first but… I got better. Not perfect, but better. And I… Fuck I even talked through some shit with someone. Made me realise I never even told you how much I love you,“ he said and you were pretty sure you stopped breathing as he looked at you, a small smile tilting his lips up. 

„Pretty sure I fell for you the first time you walked through my door wearing that pretty baby blue dress. Even though you were way too young for me. Still are. But…. I hope you knew, know. I really fucking love you,“ he said and you felt a tear running down your cheek. 

„Can you tell me about her? About Ava?“ He asked before you could form an answer to his confession. And so instead you told him. 

You told him about how you craved strawberries your whole pregnancy. How Bill traded one of his guns for the seeds from Tess.

You told him that she only slept through the night in the beginning, when Bill put her to sleep. 

You told her how much she reminded you of Sarah when she smiled at you. 

You told her how every time you looked at her you saw him. 

Hours went by where you two talked, you ending up leaning against Joel’s side, his arm around you. His fingers brushing over your arm, his other hand still holding yours. His lips brushing over your skin when he told you about how Ellie ended up at in his care. 

How he wanted to take her to Wyoming to search for his brother who might know how to find the fireflies. 

„Do you know where he is?“ You asked and he shrugged. 

„Not exactly. I know he messaged me from the Cody tower, so that’s where we’ll be going,“ he mumbled and you nodded. 

„We could take Bill’s truck,“ you said and he stilled. You looked up at him. 

„We?“ He asked and you chuckled, sitting yourself up so you were facing him, your hand now on his cheek. 

„You really think I’m gonna let you go now?“ You asked with a smile. 

And then you finally kissed him. 

It was decided that you would leave within the next 5 days, giving you enough time to make a list (You always made lists) of everything you had to pack. 

Which was a lot. Getting four people across the country on a trip that hopefully would be just like you remembered road trips to be, took a lot of supplies. 

And while you were preoccupied deciding which food was best to take, Joel had asked you if he could spend some time with Ava. He wanted to get to know her. And of course, you agreed. Watching him, Ellie and Ava walk towards the garage where they spend hours doing god knows what. 

It was almost dark outside when they walked back in, your heart melting as you watched Joel carry a very sleepy Ava inside who told you all about how seatbelts where very scary, something you would make sure to ask Joel about as you took her upstairs, putting her to bed. 

The days went by quickly like that.

Joel quickly became Ava’s favourite person which could have to do with the fact, that she was always allowed to sit on his shoulders. Ellie had been confused, yet delighted at the change in the grumpy man she had left the QZ with. 

He even got his Dad jokes out, making the teenager groan in mock annoyance throughout the day. Ellie also spend a lot of time with you, wanting to learn everything you offered to teach her. Starting from making protein bars for the trip down to how to properly braid her hair. 

Even though she preferred you doing it. 

You got the impression that she never really had anyone how just… listened to her or wanted to spend time with her. She told you she grew up in FEDRA School and that her mother had died while giving birth. 

She had no family and her best friend (though you got the impression Riley had been more than just a friend) had died not that long ago. 

That the only thing she had left in life was her purpose to save the world. Joel had told you that she was immune, Ellie showing you the healed scars to confirm it. 

„You know that that’s not the only thing you have left, right?“ You asked her, sitting on the porch next to her, enjoying one last sunset, watching Joel and Ava play soccer. Her little feet chasing after Joel with happy squeals. 

„What do you mean?“ Ellie asked and you looked at her with a smile. 

„You have us, Ellie. You think we just gonna let you go?“ You asked and she stubbornly shook her head. 

„I have to do this. It’s my purpose. I have to save the world,“ she said and looked away from you. 

„Are you saying this because you feel that way, or because someone told you so?“ You asked and she looked at you. 

„Because it should be your decision what to do and what not. And… think about it, even if they are somehow able to make a cure out of your blood, do you really think they will be able to make enough to make a vaccine for everyone? Who will decide who gets it? And if they end up deciding on giving it to everyone…. There are so many bad people out there. Do they deserve to be saved too?“ You asked and you could see her thinking about your words and you smiled softly at her. 

„Even if you don’t like hearing it, your a kid Ellie. You should grow up and live first before you make a decision like that. You don’t even know how they would get whatever they needed from your blood. If I remember correctly Cordyceps grow in the brain, what if they have to get into your brain to get out whatever they need?“ You said and her eyes widened. 

„But Marlene….“ She whispered and you reached over her, taking her hand. 

„I don’t know how well you know Marlene, but I’ve known her for more than ten years. I know how she manipulates people to get what she wants. You wouldn’t even notice it,“ you said and she sighed. 

„I’m gonna think about it,“ she said finally and you gave her a small smile. 

„That’s all I ask about. Now how about you get upstairs and take one last long hot shower before we are on the road for days?“ You asked and she nodded, standing up and turning away from you to walk inside the house before she turned back to you and hugged you quickly.

After saying good night to Ellie later you walked towards your daughters room, her little suitcase for her toys laying open next to her bed, waiting for Sluggi to be put into the next morning. She was already in bed, Joel sitting on the floor next to her, reading to her. 

You wished you could take a picture of this. Unfortunately the Polaroid camera had broken earlier this year. 

„Mommy!“ A tired Ava smiled as she saw you, her arms raised towards you. Joel looked up and smiled at you as you walked over, climbing into the bed behind your daughter, pulling her into your arms. 

„What story is Joel reading you?“ You asked. 

„The little mermaid,“ she said and you found Joel’s eyes. You had been thinking about it for the last days now. Telling her who Joel really is. He slipped into your life like the missing piece, the man you had fallen in love with all these years back seemingly falling right back into his role as being the best father there ever could be. 

So before you could talk yourself out of it you said

„Your sister loved that one too.“

Joel gulped, his eyes growing sad for a moment, before he looked at Ava. 

„I have a sister?“ She asked you, her eyes big.

„Mmmh…. Her name was Sarah. She watched the movie every single night before she went to bed,“ you explained and Ava pursed her lips in an ooooh motion. 

„There was a movie?“ She asked in awe.

„Oh yeah there was. And a cassette with the music. Can’t remember how often she made me listen to it“ Joel said and smiled softly. 

„Where is Sarah?“ Ava asked and your smile went sad. 

„She’s where Uncle Bill and Uncle Frank are. Watching over us,“ you explained and she hummed. 

„I wish I could hug her,“ she whispered and you nodded, tears in your eyes, squeezing her against your chest, your hand reaching out Joel’s hand finding yours as you kissed her forehead, looking at him who had tears in his eyes. 

„Me too baby. Me too,“ you whispered before taking a deep breath.

„You know Joel is her daddy,“ you finally said and she looked at you. 

„He is?“ She asked and you nodded. 

„I bet he is the best daddy,“ she sighed and you chuckled at Joel’s cheeks turning pink. 

„Yeah he is. What would you say if I tell you that Joel is your daddy too?“ You asked and her big eyes looked at you first and then her head turned towards Joel. 

„My daddy?“ She asked and both you and Joel nodded with a smile, her smile getting wider, before she jawned.

„I always wanted a daddy,“ she whispered before her eyes dropped close. 

You were walking down the stairs to Bill's basement after you showered, finding Joel checking if he could manage to take any more guns. The supplies had all been packed into the truck already, but he just couldn’t bring himself to leave anything of value behind. 

He looked up when he heard your footsteps, giving you a small smile. 

Walking over to him you were surprised when he reached for you, pulling you into his lap, one of his arms looped around you, his other hand on your cheek, his fingers brushing over your skin. 

„I didn’t know you were gonna tell her,“ he whispered and you smiled. 

„She deserves to know. I’m sorry I didn’t tell her sooner. If I would have stayed you wouldn’t have missed so much…“ he stopped you by kissing you softly. 

„None of that. We both know I would have fucked this up. I would have said some really fucked up things and hurt you even more. So, there’s nothing you have to be sorry for, okay?“ He looked at you, his eyes pleading. 

You released a long breath, bringing both of your arms up to cross behind his neck. 

„Have I told you lately that I love you, Joel Miller?“ You whispered with a small smile that he mirrored. 

„Don’t think so. But I don’t blame you, I gotta say it a lot more often than you to make up for all the years I didn’t tell you. I do love hearing it though. Love you,“ he mumbled before he kissed you again. His lips moving on top of yours slowly, his hand tilting your head up a little so he could deepen the kiss. 

With a little sigh you parted your lips for him, his tongue dipping into your mouth, a deep moan coming from him, his arm pulling you closer against him. 

There had been lots of making out in the last days, stolen kisses when the girls weren’t in the room, secret touches under the table while you had dinner. 

But you haven’t slept together. 

And you were ready. 

„Joel,“ you mumbled, parting from his lips. He hummed, his lips running down your jaw. 

„We aren’t gonna be alone for a while,“ you whimpered, your head tilting up to give his wandering lips some more space. 

„What are you proposing?“ He asked, playfully nibbling on your neck. 

„I’m proposing that you fuck me, Miller. Right here,“ you gasped when you felt his other hand slip between your legs. 

„Right here?“ He asked, his fingers over the seam of your slick panties. 

„Mmmmhh….“ You closed your eyes, biting your lip when he pushed the fabric to the side, his fingers dipping between you slick folds, lazily teasing you. 

„All that for me?“ He asked and you opened your eyes, crashing your lips against his. 

„It’s been almost four years Joel. Please don’t tease me,“ you whined and his eyes softened before he picked you up and set you down on the table behind him. Within the next minutes you were both naked, your hands in his hair as you kissed him as he stood between your parted legs, the heavy weight of his cock resting against your stomach. 

„Gonna need to prepare you,“ he hummed, his hands on your ass. You shook your head. 

„Please just fuck me. You know I can take it,“ you whined, one of your hands wrapping around his cock, making him hiss. He groaned, sucking your bottom lip between his before he slapped your hand away, his dark eyes fixed on yours as he held his hand out to you. Waiting. 

Feeling your whole body heat up you spit in his hand and the left corner of his mouth twitched. 

„My good girl,“ he praised you and you couldn’t stop whimpering. 

He brought his hand down to wrap it around his cock, coating it in your saliva, before he lined himself up. You had dripped on the table you were sitting on, more than ready to take him. 

„I love you,“ he whispered and you looked at him with a soft smile, your lips parting when he slowly pushed his cock into you. Filling you inch by inch, both of you starring into each others eyes. 

„Missed this,“ you moaned. 

„Missed you,“ you crossed your legs behind him, giving him a little push, his cock finally filing you up completely. 

„Fucking Perfect,“ he groaned kissing you again before he began to move, pumping into you slowly. 

You let yourself fall back down against the table, stretching your arms over your head, your back arching, your tits moving every time Joel fucked into you. 

He licked his fingers, bringing it down between your legs, his thrusts getting harder as he rubbed your clit, your pussy clenching around him. 

„Yes… Baby… Just like that….“ You moaned, your hands coming down to play with your tits. 

„You gonna be a good girl and cum for me?“ He asked, moving faster, his skin slapping against yours every time he moved.

Nodding, you moaned, your eyes rolling back as you came, your whole body shaking as he fucked you through it. 

„Shit….“ He groaned, both of his hands now coming to rest on either side of you as he leaned down, fucking into you deeply, chasing his own orgasm. 

„Want you to cum again,“ he grunted, kissing you, drilling his cock into you, the whole table moving over the floor. 

„Want you to cum inside me. Let me feel you,“ you whimpered, your hands in his hair, trying to meet his thrusts. 

„Fuck that is…. Not a good idea….“ He laughed and you grinned. 

„I don’t care. Wanna feel you. Cum for me, Joel. Cum inside me,“ you whispered and he groaned, fucking into you a half dozen times more before you felt him twitch inside of you, filling you, making you cum for a second time. 

Both out of breath you looked at each other before Joel leant down and kissed you. 

„Sleep in bed with me?“ You hummed against his lips. 

„As long as you let me,“ he answered against your lips before you both sneaked upstairs. 

Against all odds after six days of a rather boring trip across the country you reached the radio tower in Cody. And two days later a group patrol of people on horses found you, asking you all kinds of questions before a man pulled the bandana that had been covering his face down, revealing Tommy Miller in the flesh. 

By now you were living in Jackson for almost a year. 

Ellie had decided to stay and live her life, the constant threat of someone looking for her still on the horizon, but it was decided that the town was not in immediate danger. Patrols kept an eye out for fireflies, but they haven’t spotted anyone. 

You were living a happy life all things considered. 

Ava went to pre school, Ellie went to normal school. They really became sisters in the last year, spending a lot of time together. 

Even though Ellie started to spend more and more time with a girl called Dina you suspected was more than just a friend. 

Joel was always working on improving the house. 

He had changed the most, back to the man he had been before the outbreak. Yes, he still was the protector when he needed to be, but most of the time he was just Joel. Your husband. 

„Yellow?“ He asked, holding the can of paint up.

You walked over to him with a smile, nodding.

„It’s a happy colour. I like happy colours,“ you shrugged and he chuckled, setting the can down on the floor before he put his arms around you, pulling you against his chest.

One of his hands came to rest on your growing belly, the baby inside kicking up a storm as if it could sense their dads hand, making you both smile. 

„Still think it’s gonna be a girl?“ You asked and he nodded, before he kissed you softly. 

„Think I’m meant to be surrounded by beautiful girls,“ he hummed before he kissed you again. 

[gguk-n]

Chapter 1- Anonymous Conversations

Unravelling Max's Mystery (Max Verstappen x Online Friend!Reader)

Series Masterlist

Summary- Y/N formed an unexpected bond with a boy behind the screen. He doesn't have many interest it seems, except for reading her stupid poems.

{Reader's POV}

12/07/2012

Dear Diary, Stella is leaving for Canada tomorrow forever. Today was the last day of school before the summer break so I went to Stella's house after school. It's so shitty, how can she leave me like this and before the start of high school. I don't have any friends other than her, what am I supposed to do??? This isn't fair, first Faye moved back to her home country a couple years back and now Stella. It's like they don't even care about me. I made a google plus account so we can stay in touch. Actually everyone's on google plus, I'm just late to the party. I'm sure we'll still be close.

02/01/2013

OMG!! I think I'm in love. There's this new boy band, One Direction. Ava told me about them last year but I brushed her off saying they weren't my cup of tea, but OMG!!! They are fucking perfect and I love Niall so much. He's so cute and has the dreamiest eyes and his accent, I'm gonna faint. I bought the Take Me Home album yesterday!! I even put up their poster above my bed, hehe!! Sooooo, I may or may not be writing now. I think I'm gonna be an author. The stuff isn't great like Shakespeare but I'm sure I'll improve. I've written a couple poems and Aria read them and she thinks they are great. I'm gonna start uploading them on google plus. I made a separate page for it, under a pseudonym. If I really improve, maybe I can publish my work.

I was sat at my laptop, typing the latest story I came up with during lunch so I could upload it. There were a lot of people who were reading my work and even encouraged me. There is improvement, but then again, we can do better, I'm sure. My parents aren't very happy with how I'm wasting my time writing instead of focusing on my education since I'm in high school now. I finished typing the story and clicked the upload button, I got a comment on the post. It was from this guy, named Max, just Max. He always read all of my work and writes the nicest comments under them. I haven't spoken to him personally ever since my mother kept warning me about stranger danger and that it could be some 50 year old dude. But his comments are encouraging and make me want to write more. I hope he knows the kind of effect he's having on me.

My birthday is in a couple of days, I don't know what I'll do since I don't really have a lot of friends. Even Aria is away during that time, so I don't really have anyone to go out with. My parents are busy as always.

So, out of desperation or sadness, I don't know which one, I posted on google plus saying that it was my birthday. The first person who replied was Max as always. I really wanna know when this guy sleeps or how he gets any work done if he is online so much. He messaged me personally too, to wish me again and even asked what I did. I couldn't lie because my heart was heavy, so I told him. I literally just unloaded about not having any friends and spending the day alone because work was more important for my parents. He was so nice about it. He spent the next hour talking to me and cheering me up. He's apparently 15, from Netherlands. He loves cats and lives with his dad and sister. He sounds like a fun guy.

After that, both of us ended up chatting on google plus regularly. I would message him immediately after school and spend the next couple of hours talking to him. Some times, he'd be gone a couple weekends but it was no biggy. I'm sure he had other commitments instead of entertaining a dumb teenager.

Max's birthday is on 30 September. I wanted to be the first one, so I stayed up late to match the dutch timings and wished him. He replied a little while later. He wasn't very excited about it. I get it, maybe his friends aren't there or couldn't make it to his birthday. I was gonna cheer him like he cheered me up. I wish I could send him a present. He really was a light in dark time. When I had no friends in school I could rely on, he came like the knight in shining armour. I just want to be a good and reliable friend to him like he is to me. He is such a sweetheart. We've never spoken on call yet. I guess I'm still a little scared and we've only known each other for a few months. I'm gonna hold on that but Max is a genuinely nice person in my eyes. But his dad doesn't sound like the nicest person from what he says, but I can't tell him that his dad is shitty so I just read his texts.

18/12/2013

Dear Diary, Maxie is the cutest. I haven't seen or heard him yet but I feel like he is. Otherwise, why would he encourage me to follow my dreams? He was so understanding and gave great advice. You might wonder why I needed the advice, diary. I told my parents I wanna pursue a degree in literature and we had a huge fight since apparently I'm throwing my life away and I should try to get a proper degree that might get me a job. Apparently, I'm not thinking straight. I've been thinking about becoming an author for some time now, it's my one passion, I've realised. And if it means struggling, I would rather struggle and be happy than be in a dead end job. Just because they are some big shot business people doesn't mean I wanna do that do. ugh!!! I hate them. Maxie calmed me down honestly, he heard me out and told me it was okay to follow my dreams. I think he is such a good friend. I won't tell him that, he has a big ego as is. LOL!!

I've been gaining a lot of traction on my posts on google plus. I have a couple thousand followers but Max is the most active of them all. Max is so effortlessly funny. He did ask one time if we could talk on call, I told him that my microphone was broken. I'm still a little skeptical. I know, even though I'm literally sharing everything with him, I've never spoken on call or video with him. Maybe some day.

04/03/2014

Dear Diary, I got a new phone and a new number. The previous one was one of my parents multiple numbers but this one is my own. I feel like an adult, hehe!! I made a whatsapp, maybe I'll share my number with Maxie and we might start chatting on there. Google plus had become a bit of hassle and I'm not uploading on it like I used to. I usually only open it to talk to Max. I think it would be better to shift it to another service. He's been a little busy this year compared to the last, didn't tell me much but I think it has to do with him being in his final year of high school. Can't relate, but I hope I'm done with high school soon. It fucking sucks. But on the bright side, I've gotten close to Nia and Aria and I could call Aria my best friend but she considers Nia her best friend. I don't mind being her friend. I have Max anyways.

Max has been quite busy lately, but I don't blame him. I would be busy in my final year of high school too. Even with all that, he has taken time out to talk to me. I did share my number with him, so now instead of google plus, which is a barren wasteland, we text on whatsapp. I've suggested talking on call some time when he's free, which hasn't happened yet.

We had set up a time to talk, it was really early here but I didn't mind, I was up anyways. I couldn't wait to hear his voice. I was anxious as well, what if he's some pedophile; all these thoughts raced through my head when my phone rang. Max- Hi, Y/N! Y/N- Hey, Max!! How are you? Max- I'm good, what about you? Y/N- Yeah, I'm good too. haha!! This is so weird talking to you. Max- yeah, you sound pretty. Fuck was he flirting, is this flirting? A million thoughts ran through my head, no one's ever flirted with me before. I felt my cheeks heat up. Y/N- You sound nice too. I mean....you have a nice voice. Max- haha, thanks, this is the first time some one has said that. Y/N- soooo, what have you been up too?? You've been so busy lately. There was a pause on the other end. I heard shuffling. Max- yeah, I've been busy with stuff. I'll be done soon for a while now. Y/N- That's great I need my best friend back! The conversation flowed smoothly. It didn't feel like we were talking on call for the first time. I had a lot of fun talking to Max. He sounds like a teenager, much to my relief. He's just as funny on call as he is on text.

After that, we ended up calling each other regularly. Max would answer my calls whenever but sometimes I felt bad about calling him at the crack ass of dawn in Netherland so I would avoid calling him whenever. He is so kind and listens well but damn does he talk. Every one who knows me calls me talkative, if they heard Max their ears would bleed. But I like hearing him talk, he has the most random and vast knowledge, he's helped me write too many of my papers because I didn't have to research, I could just ask him; he's like a walking encyclopedia.

17/05/2015

Dear Diary, I think I'm in love. It's not some celebrity this time but I think it's Max. I don't even know that dude's last name but I'm in love. He not like the guys in school, he's so mature and funny and sweet and understanding and he supports me so much. I didn't know when or how but I think I love him. Obviously I won't tell him. It's prolly a crush since I have't dated anyone ever. I'll get over it, can't ruin my friendship over this. As is, he has gotten so busy. I think he is going to college. He didn't say it explicitly but why else would he be so busy right now if not applying for colleges. I don't know the dutch education system but I'm sure he busy pursuing higher education. He said he liked cars, I think he'll do something with cars. I didn't really ask in more details. I'm sure he'll tell me when he wants to. We have a chill friendship, we share when and what we want to. Alas, I hope this crush doesn't ruin my friendship.

09/08/2015

This is bad, my crush on Max has only gone on to increase. He's so kind to me, what am I supposed to do? Also he's the only one who can calm me down after a fight with my parents regarding my future. Sadly, he gotten so busy. He's gone for a while every few weeks. But lately he's been free. We've been talking a lot. He sounds a lot more rested lately too. I'm sure college is tough. But he's strong and I know he'll do it.

[Little did Y/N know, Max was busy racing across the world in Redbull's junior team. He was in his first year as a formula one driver, hence he was so busy. Max had no intentions of telling her, he liked being just Max, a guy from Netherlands who could talk to her. He enjoyed the disconnect he got with her]

[elliespillowprincess]

casual.

a/n: just wanted to let u guys know this fic is inspired by casual by chappel roan!! i think i did see someone else do this so if it seems like im copying i promise im not!! and comment below who made this idea originally!!

c/w: smut!, ellie’s a little toxic, not rlly a happy ending, super short

why you should not support neil druckmann.

listen to casual while u read!!

✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮ ✮

“cmon baby, give it to me, that’s it. that’s my girl.” ellie’s hands are pumping inside you at an animalistic pace whilst she kisses you deeply. you’re in your room, music playing from your phone nearby. ellie had come by to eat takeout and watch a movie with you, and it always ended the same way: her deep in your cunt, guiding you through your orgasm, peppering you with praise and kisses, just to get up and leave right after.

you look over to the vase of flowers she got you the other day after your date at the aquarium. you didn’t really know what you were, just that you were something. in group settings she’d act like you didn’t exist, but would text you after to come over.

“please, y/n, come undone on me fuckkkkk.”

“you’re mine, got it? all fuckin mine.”

after she’d make you finish, she’d just get up and get dressed like nothing happened, like she wasn’t just praising you, getting you off, all for your benefit. if you beg her stay, she’d wait until you fell asleep to sneak out of your house, never being there to hold you through the night.

she acted like the two of you were nothing when you’re with your shared friend group, the two of you not even exchanging glances.

this is how it’s been, she’d treat you like a princess in private, and run away as soon as you finished. you wanted to keep your mouth shut, wanted to act like this didn’t bother you, be the cool girl that holds her tongue and gives her space.

but you weren’t.

because this wasn’t casual, you knew it wasn’t, you knew she knew it wasn’t.

but ellie was scared. she was scared of you, of the two of you actually being something. she liked the easiness, she wasn’t tied down to a relationship, she didn’t have any obligations, it was casual, easy.

she’s knuckle deep in you, praising you as you come undone on her fingers. you try to bring her to your face and kiss her, but she pulls away. “ellie, what- what is this?” you blurt. the sentence lingered in the air like a cloud of smoke, she felt as if she inhaled it and let the truth out everything would go wrong. she stared blankly at you, unsure of what to say back. she gets up, grabbing her things. you can tell she wants to say something but her lips are sealed as though superglue was spread across her lips. “ellie..?” as she’s reaching for the door and beginning to step out, she turns around for a moment.

“it’s casual, right?” she says before closing the door behind her. you were left speechless, naked in your bed and feeling dirty. you text your friends, telling them what just happened.

quinn: dude i’m sorry but you’re a loser

ava: why are you still hanging around her?

you silence your phone, not wanting to hear what they said, even if it was the truth.

you knew it was impossible to be casual with ellie. i mean, your favorite bra was in her dresser. the night she took you to a drive in movie and ice cream after, was the first time you went to her house. the two of you stayed up for hours, her making you finish multiple times. you stayed on the phone with joel for hours when she disappeared for a week, talking him down. how could this possibly be casual?

you let a few days go by, not texting ellie at all. it was giving you anger issues, like she was using you. maybe ellie was right, maybe it was just casual fun.

you open your phone, scrolling to find her contact that previously had hearts around her name, but was replaced by just her name after what she said.

y/n: baby will u get me off again?

els: i’m omw

[notjustjavierpena]

I have recently watched scenes from a marriage with oscar isaac and my mind which connects everything with hubby javi immediately went to this:

imagine wife’s and javi’s friends are going through a divorce, there’s cheating m, miscommunication etc and just a very hard time.

I feel like Javi and Wife would have a conversation about this due to the proximity of it happening to their friends. One about trust and if they’re happy. It’s not about insecurity or anything just them both communicating effectively and giving the other reassurance that this is not on the cards for them.

I just value their relationship so much.

Reassess

Series Masterpost | Main Masterpost | Support a disabled creator

A/N: Hiya anon! I hope it’s okay that I tweaked your request slightly to fit my version of hubby and wife. Enjoy ❤️ Thanks so much for proofreading, @angelofsmalldeath-codeine !!!

Summary: You and Javier’s friends are going through a divorce, and it suddenly makes you wonder about your own marriage.

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader (no y/n)

Tags: +18, talk about divorce, talk about cheating, brief descriptions of piv sex with creampie, hurt/comfort, love!, mention of pregnancy and pregnant reader, cuddling, kisses, Javier is a great husband and you are anxious

Word count: 1.6k

Link to this work on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54352768

Reassess

Jonathan and Mira are getting a divorce. The news had been announced to you by Javier when he entered the dimly lit living room on a Thursday night, looking paler than a ghost after what you had wrongly assumed to be a same-as-always phone conversation about football, work and going out for a beer in the near future. 

“No!” You had instinctively covered your mouth with your hand to suppress an animated gasp. Apparently, Mira had come clean about seeing another man a few days earlier and it only took shy of two days for their whole marriage to crumble. The thought was and is terrifying. 

It seems to dampen the mood between you and your husband significantly. There are more pregnant silences, longer stares, more hurried kisses, and worried faces in the middle of your daily routines that become opportunities for reflection when doing something mundane as folding laundry. However, the elephant in the room becomes most unbearable when Javier rolls off of you after making love to you a week after the news hit. 

He stares up at the ceiling and pants as he tries coming down from his high, reaching up to run his fingers through his slightly sweaty hair. You shift on your side of the bed to turn your body towards him, and gently lay a hand on his chest, “That was really good.”

“Hm? What?” He replies, “Oh right, yeah.”

“Honey,” you furrow your brow, “I don’t think I particularly like having sex with you if you’re not here with me.” 

“Lo siento (I’m sorry),” his eyes find yours, his voice is genuine, “I can’t stop thinking about Jon and Mira.”

Your eyes soften at that. It is nice to know that he is as shaken by this happening as you are, and in such close proximity to your own marriage too even if it technically has nothing to do with you. It suddenly hits why it has been so hard to start up a conversation about it. 

“Me either,” you sigh and scratch his chest gently with your nails and lay your head on his shoulder. He takes hold of your wrist and rubs the back of your hand with his thumb in soothing circles, “I can’t believe they ended up like that, who would have thought?”

“And Ava?” Javier sounds devastated and turns his head toward yours so he can rest his lips in your hair. 

“She must be so confused,” you mumble back, lost in thought. Ava is Mira and Jonathan’s daughter who sometimes has play dates with Inés, and to think that she has to deal with her parents not being able to work as a couple, especially since Mira apparently had to go sleep with someone else, is a scenario that you find nauseating when your brain automatically starts imagining your own children in the same scenario. You don’t think Lucas would ever forgive you if you caused that much hurt to his father, “I don’t know what Mira was thinking. Ava has to deal with her mom having hurt her dad. Why would she put her through that?”

“Jonathan said she’s in love with this new guy,” Javier argues. 

“I suppose sometimes you just fall in love with someone else,” you say without any emotion in your voice except for maybe a hint of disgust. 

“Are you happy? With me?” The question has been looming over the both of you since the news hit. It was only a matter of time before one of you would start reassessing your own marriage. 

You lift your head up to look Javier straight in the eyes, and even if you knew it was coming, you still feel taken aback by how much it makes your guts turn to even be told to consider it. The answer is so clear, “What? I—“

“That’s not an immediate yes,” he furrows his brow in concern. 

“Don’t be absurd,” you say back, “I love you so much it’s ridiculous.”

“But do you ever worry about us?” He continues. 

“This is the part where you say you love me too,” you joke without much humor in your voice. 

“Are you kidding? I’m nothing without you,” he lifts the hand you still have on his chest to kiss your palm, “Te amo tanto (I love you so much) but I need you to answer the question.”

“I don’t ever worry about us, no,” you answer truthfully and Javier visibly relaxes, “I know you. I trust you. It doesn’t even occur to me that I could have anything different in my life, you know? It feels like I would always have found you somewhere else if not here.”

“Perhaps they looked for something else when things became routine,” he suggests, resting your hand against his cheek.

“It’s never routine for me to tell you I love you,” you tell him with a little smile, “There’s no going back to the way things were before you.” 

“The idea of having anything else but this,” he trails off for a second, weighing his words and reaching out for you with his free hand. He cups the back of your knee to pull your leg over his naked body, “It’s just not in the cards for me. I’ll never love anyone the way that I love you.”

“Is this code for you’re stuck with me?” You crawl closer to kiss him on the mouth and tighten the leg around him, “Hm?”

“Sí (yes), you’re stuck with me, baby,” he says against your lips. 

“Do you promise that?” You whisper after pulling back a little, smiling softly as you look down at his mouth. He initiates another kiss after nodding. 

You kiss for a while without rushing it, deeply until you share each breath in your intense embrace. Despite just having had sex with him fifteen minutes ago, you want him again in a way that has him as hard as when you first got together. He fucks you open slowly with you on your back, makes you come on his cock with an almost pained tone in your whimper. He is everywhere on you, soaking you in love. The way he gasps along with you as he comes inside of you has your heart pounding in your chest. 

“No quiero a nadie más que a ti (I don’t want anyone else other than you),” he says when basking in the afterglow. However, you have already gotten out of bed to get cleaned up in the bathroom. In contrast to your husband, your afterglow is replaced by anxiety that you have just promised isn’t there. 

“I don’t want to end up like that,” you say while peeing with the door open. Javier moves on the bed to be able to look at you. 

“We won’t, te lo prometo (I promise you that),” he is quick to answer. You try to give him a smile but he notices the way you falter, “Anything you want to talk about? Anything on your mind?"

“They used to be so happy,” you sigh deeply and get up after finishing your business. You move to the sink and start washing your hands, your back suddenly towards him, “Makes me wonder if we're strong enough to weather anything.”

You hear the weight of him shift on the mattress and a second later, the soft pads of his feet across the tiled bathroom floor. He is behind you, looking at you in the mirror. You feel grateful for the sincerity in his eyes.

“Baby,” he tuts, wrapping his strong arms around you from behind and resting his chin on your shoulder. One of his hands goes down to lay on your stomach right below your belly button. You have just started to show, and the both of you have already talked about how early it is that your belly has started protruding but none of you have any clue why yet as you haven’t had your first scan. 

Javier kisses your bare shoulder, “This is my life, and I love it, and I would never hurt you… I trust you not to hurt me too.”

You silently turn off the tap to dry your hands but Javier doesn’t let you move. He lifts your chin so he can stare at you in the mirror, “I need you to trust me when I say that ten years with you have only made me want ten, twenty, thirty more. I love you. I choose you every day. Jonathan and Mira didn’t choose each other. We’re not them.”

“I love you too,” you shake your hands dry instead and then turn in your husband’s arms. You hug him close and he walks you out of the bathroom whilst still holding you tightly. 

“Three kids so far,” he reminds you whilst guiding you back to bed, “A decade down the line. We must be doing something right.”

“But what if—“

“You worry too much, mi vida (my life),” he says and smacks your ass as you crawl back into your bed. You glare back at him but he just snickers while crawling in too, “Get comfortable and go to sleep.”

“I don’t know if I can,” you say truthfully.

“Of course, you can,” Javier joins you under the covers. He lays down close to you and without saying a word, reaches out to gently and repeatedly stroke his hand over your hair. The warmth of his palm soothes your worry, each caress easing away the weight in your chest. 

You wonder if Mira left because Jonathan didn’t do this sort of thing anymore. Javier has done it for ten years. This fact makes sleep find you easily.

.

.

If you would like to follow my writing then go follow @notjustjavierpena-fics and turn on notifications 💖❤️

[feyhunter78]

Semiformal Kisses and Cat Fights

Art Cred: Kimmy_art0912 on Insta! Description: Among pulsating music, colorful lights, and a few girls who can't keep their eyes to themselves tensions rise, and your patience has finally run out. Happy Valentine's Day my loves!

The music is loud, blaring through the speakers, vibrating through the floor, multicolored lights spin, casting circles of neon colors across the walls of the bar. The smell of spilled drinks and perfume fills the air as you enter, your hand gripping Miguel’s bicep as you scan the room for Janey.

It’s been…a bit weird since your encounter in Miguel’s room a few weeks ago. At first, you were afraid you’d fucked up, that you had overstepped and ruined your friendship, but then it all kinda went back to normal. As normal as the tentative relationship between two people who almost kissed could be.

When you invited him to be your date for your sorority’s semiformal, on Valentine’s Day no less, you were so very afraid. What if he said no, what if everything you thought you saw, that you felt back in his room was all in your head? Which is why you said as friends right as he said yes. No going back then, so you—like a coward—played up the platonicness of it all, and tried to pretend like you weren’t avoiding eye contact.

Then everything got even weirder with the whole Ava thing. You swore up and down to everyone—except Mina—that you and Miguel are purely platonic, even when you gave him the cold shoulder and cried over him talking with his ex. Super embarrassing, no one but Miguel potentially believed you, and now you’re in a prison of your own making. You should’ve just grabbed him when he came to your door to apologize, should’ve kissed him when he stood in your room admiring his costume. Why didn’t you?

One of your sisters drifts by, bumping into Miguel, fluttering her eyelashes at him as she apologizes.

Right, that’s why, because you’re jealous and insecure and can’t stand to see other people flirt with him. So it’s better to just keep your distance so you don’t end up crying again.

Miguel’s bicep is solid under your grasp, so large your hand can’t even grip all of it.

The theme of the night was Great Lovers of History, which was a fancy way of saying dress like your favorite couple. It wasn’t hard to pick a costume, you, and Miguel both love the novel Dracula, even if it wasn’t as popular as the movie was. You had to bite the inside of your cheek to keep from making some undignified noise when you saw how good Miguel looked. Those stupid huge muscles bulging, his broad chest, his toned back, he somehow made the ridiculous costume look impressive, and he even wore red contacts to get that perfect vampiric look.

You of course looked hot as hell, dressed in a flowy, but scandalously low cut white dress, hair curled and bouncy. Bram Stoker had never named Dracula’s Brides, but there was one, seemingly the eldest, that he favored over the other, so you decided to claim her role for the night.

“I don’t see Janey yet, she said she was already here.” You yell over the music, throwing a smile to one of your sisters as she passes by with her date. They’re dressed like Jim and Pam from The Office, it’s cute, a bit basic, but cute.

“Maybe she’s at the bar?” Miguel suggests leaning down to hear you better as he guides you through the crowd.

You can see people’s eyes on him, drinking him in, and feel another stab of jealousy. You know he looks hot, but he’s your date, not theirs. They can keep their eyes to themselves.

Janey and her date Eddie are dressed like Elizabeth and Mr. Darcey. You spot them immediately, right at the bar where Miguel suggested they might be.

You gush over Janey’s outfit, and she gushes over yours, and for a while that’s it. It’s a nice night, you drink, have fun with your friends, dance with Miguel, try not to feel insane over the number of times you have to remind someone that Miguel is here with you, and generally have a good time.

Then someone starts crying. It’s a new member, one whose Big is currently more interested in making out with her boyfriend in one of the bar’s booths than paying attention to her Little.

The new member, Addy, has tears in her eyes and mascara running down her cheeks as you usher her towards the bathroom, promising Miguel you’ll be back as soon as someone is able to break Danika away from her boyfriend.

You dry Addy’s tears while she tells you that she’s just so overwhelmed. That she brought the guy she has a crush on with her, but he seems more interested in one of the other girls in her new member class than her.

“And then Kaley said, ‘oh we have a class together, I was just saying hi,’ but like why don’t you just say hi then leave, why is she trying to dance with him?” Addy sobs, taking the paper towels from your hands and burying her face in them.

“I don’t know, sweetheart, but I’m sure he’s just trying to be nice and that’s why he’s dancing with her.” You coo, smoothing down her hair.

“And her boobs look so much better than mine.” Addy continues, flinging herself into your arms, and hiding her face in the crook of your neck.

“What? No, no way, you look amazing! And hey, if that’s why he’s dancing with her than he’s an ass, and you deserve better.”

“She literally brought her own date, and she’s been ignoring him! Spencer is a nice guy, we had Intro to Philosophy together last semester, and he took really good notes, so he would let me borrow them when I missed something or got sick. And, and he’s like super cute, I don’t know why she wouldn’t just stay with him.”

You bite your tongue to keep from laughing. “Maybe you should go talk with Spencer then, if your date is going to be an asshole, then there’s nothing wrong with talking to someone who isn’t. You don’t even have to dance with him, just go say hi. I bet he’s feeling the same way you are.”

Addy sniffles and nods, wiping away the last of her tears. “Yeah, Spencer has a really big heart, I’m sure he’s upset.”

You give her an encouraging smile and keep your hand on her upper back, supporting her as she walks past her date, who is very clearly staring at Kaley’s boobs.

Spencer pops his head up when he sees Addy, a smile spreading across his lips. “Hey Addy, you doing okay? I um…I saw you crying, I wanted to go over, but…”

“I’m okay, how about you? We’re kinda in the same boat, aren’t we?” She says, taking the seat next to him.

He scoots over so she has more room, his head dipping down to hear her better, his body language screaming I like you; I feel safe with you. It’s adorable, you feel like Cupid, as you watch the two immediately fall into a deep discussion about emotions and the philosophy behind them.

Now that Addy was taken care of, you roll your shoulders out and stop at the bar before heading back towards the dance floor. You don’t really know how it happened but two shots later and everything you’ve been drinking the whole night is finally catching up with you.

The only thing on your mind is Miguel, how much you adore him, how handsome he looks, how every fake bitch in this room has been eyeing him like a hyena eyes a wounded gazelle. You have to find him; you can’t leave your wounded gazelle all alone in this pack of jackals.

You find him, but he’s not alone. Your sister, though not one you particularly care for, is talking to him, well, trying to at least.

Dana is dressed pretty basic, red dress, and heels. You’re not sure who she’s supposed to be, and she doesn’t look bad, but the dress is too small, it doesn’t fit her right, and the color makes her skin look washed out.

“So, who are you with?” Dana shouts over the music, clearly unable to see you as you approach from the side, basically hidden by the other dancers.

“Y/N.” Miguel answers, eyes darting back to the bathroom entrance, your drink still in his hand, his discarded somewhere.

Poor thing, he didn’t see you leave.

“She left you all alone? That’s so mean.” Dana says, giving him an overexaggerated pout.

“She went to take care of a new member.” He says, always so quick to defend you.

She trails a finger down his chest, batting her eyelashes up at him. “Still, she shouldn’t leave a handsome thing like you alone.”

Miguel goes red, taking a step back, sputtering. “I—um, thank you, but I’m here with y/n, and—”

“Yeah, but y/n’s not here now, come on, live a little.” She takes your drink from Miguel’s hand. “This yours?”

Before he can say anything, she drains it, and smiles at him.

“That uh…that wasn’t mine.” Miguel says, taking another step back as she loops her arms around his neck and tries to pull him down to her level.

“Oh, too bad, and it looks like y/n still isn’t back, obviously you’re not that important to her, so why don’t you follow me upstairs?”

“Upstairs is blocked off.” Miguel says, so sweet, so oblivious. “And I’m waiting for y/n.”

He tries to gently push Dana away, but she hangs on. “Ugh, come on, y/n is so lame, don’t you want to have fun? You can have fun with me.”

You’ve had enough, blood boiling, you tap her on the shoulder, making both her and Miguel jump.

“Dana, your date is looking for you.” You say, saccharine sweet smile on your lips, your voice dripping with honey coated venom.

She untangles herself from Miguel, who looks like you caught him with his hand in the cookie jar. “Ugh, he’s so needy. Anyways, come find me if you need me, Miguel.”

The moment she leaves, Miguel turns to you, apologies spilling from his lips like water. “Y/N, I swear nothing happened, she just came up to me, and I told her I was here with you, but she kept going, and then she wanted me to go upstairs with her, and I told her upstairs is closed, and I was waiting for you and—”

You grab him by the neck of his costume and drag him off the dance floor, past the pitiful sign that asks people to stay away from the second floor, and up the stairs. Usually, the upper floor is open to the public. It’s a more secluded seating area with its own smaller bar and thick glass walls that block out some of the sound from below, bisected by cement pillars offering a modicum of privacy.

You’re tired of this, of watching everyone else get to grab him, touch him, flirt with him, he’s yours.

It’s darker on the second level, only a few safety lights, and the multicolored strobe lights flashing up from the first floor. It’s quieter as well, you can finally hear yourself think.

You keep walking until you find the corner booth and shove Miguel into it. Not for the first time you’re glad these damn booths are so big, Miguel can sit properly, facing you, without having to scrunch up. The alcohol in your system is making you brave, and a little horny, but mostly brave. You can see its effects on Miguel as well, the flush of his cheeks, the slight glaze in his eyes.

“Dulzura, please, don’t be upset, I promise, nothing happened, I wouldn’t—I’m here with you, and I know that we’re here as—as friends, but still, I wouldn’t…I didn’t—still don’t want to dance or spend time with anyone else.”

He looks so pretty, stumbling over his words, his hair all ruffled, his tone so sweet and pleading. You want him, bad. You know you shouldn’t. You were the one who said it was platonic, just friends, but when he’s here, looking the way he does, and everyone is circling around him like vultures, you just…

Fuck it.

You straddle him, grab his face, and kiss him.

Miguel short circuits, hands frozen in midair, body tense, and then it’s like a dam opens. His hands on your hips, pulling you closer, his lips moving in synchronicity with yours, warm, plush, the taste of tequila on his tongue, or maybe it’s yours, you can’t tell anymore. You’re practically devouring him with how desperate you are to finally, finally kiss him.

“Fuck, Miguel, I—I can’t be just friends with you, I can’t do it anymore.” You admit, breath catching in your throat when Miguel grabs your ass, his big warm hands hauling you even closer. “I need more, we have to be more.”

“We can be anything, anything you want.” Miguel says breathlessly, his glasses fogging up from the heat between you.

You tug his head back by his hair and attach your lips to his neck, biting down hard, intent on leaving your mark. “Don’t want other girls thinking you’re up for grabs, you’re mine, been mine since the first day of class.”

“Yes, yes, I’m yours y/n.” He whimpers, his hands caressing your body nonsensically, as if he can’t decide where to put them.

“Such a good boy for me, Miguel, looking so handsome, always so sweet, always saying just the right thing.” You continue your onslaught until his neck looks like a crime scene.

“Kiss me, please y/n, I need—please, please, I’ve wanted this for so long, please kiss me again.” Miguel begs breathlessly, looking absolutely wrecked.

So, you do, gladly, over, and over, and over again, until he builds the courage to tangle his hands in your hair, to venture under your skirt and grip your bare thighs, as he moans and squirms beneath you.

You can’t fuck him here, it’s too public, too rushed, especially knowing what you know, there’s no way in hell you’ll let Miguel’s first time be a drunken quickie at a bar. So, you pull back, cupping his cheeks, smiling softly when he whines and tries to chase after your lips.

You press your thumb to his lips, shaking your head. “We can’t, not here.”

“Why not?” He whines, pupils blown wide with lust, chest rising and falling rapidly, his grip brushing on your thigh and hip.

“Because I like you, and I respect you, so I won’t fuck you in a bar.” You tell him, pressing a chaste kiss to his kiss swollen lips before sliding from his lap.

Miguel pouts, actually pouts at you, and you nearly give in, but you steel yourself.

“Come on sweet boy, let’s go back to the party.”

He blinks at you as if he’s coming up from underwater, slow, liquid, then he bites his lip. “I um…I’m going to need a minute.”

You glance down and heat rushes to your face.

He’s hard, and huge, like massive, and your resolve starts to waver.

“What if I just?” You sit astride his lap and ghost your fingers over his covered cock. “Give you a hand?”

Nerd!Miguel Masterlist and the "part two" here

TL: @bat-bae, @nyctophilic0vitnir, @smokeywhalee, @obi-mom-kenobi, @prowlingforfood, @penggion, @crystal-crax, @oharasfilipinawife, @generalkenobitrash, @melsimps, @chrishy973, @farrowroyale, @palesatan, @scaryplanetdestroyer, @denzmallows, @36namey, @scoobysnakz, @ihateuguys, @idkbros-world @smartyren, @deputy-videogamer, @blackrose8425

[midgetmoth]

I have realized somehing with the news of a possible Farmer Vic. I looked back at “The Box” episode, and rewatched a specific scene.

The lasso scene. I never really considered it, but Vic knows how to use that lasso very, very well. During the scene, we as the audience see this as a callback to the first episode Victim was introduced into. The video that showed him and his clone using the different tools to fight against their creator.

But this is very different with the context of how GOOD Victim is at using the lasso tool. He didn’t just learn to use it, he learned to master it. He snagged Chosen out of the air-

-and then brought him in. Closing the distance, pulling on the rope until-

-he tugged on the end and brought Chosen straight to him.

To anyone, this was a clear message to Vic’s capabilities with working with tools, but what stood out to me was the scene that happens immediately after.

Chosen starts attempting to flee from Vic, dazed and already pinned, and Victim?

.. He cracks the whip, showing his strength behind the hit, the anger. The camera then slowly zooms in on Chosen-

Its this slow, subtle rise in music that we suddenly understand what’s going on. Chosen knows who this is now, Chosen suddenly remembers exactly who this is.

Everyone has been joking about how Farmer Vic’s home is about to get nuked by fire in the next AVA drop, but if that is the context: Everything lines up.

Victim having a reason to hurt Chosen, Chosen not even remembering who Victim is despite destroying his home, Victim’s cold reaction to seeing the Dark Lord getting nuked by Second(Orange) in the scene where it shows his death.

Everything suddenly makes sense. Victim isn’t just attacking Chosen because he can.

Victim isn’t just getting his revenge on Alan.

He is shaming the god who hurt his friends. The animals, the sticks who took Victim in upon his first fall down to the lands he’s now stuck in.

He was casted by his god to die, but was saved by strangers. He was given a home with cattle and lamb, given food and comfort. For once in his life he was safe and free from pain.

Then Chosen and Dark came along, born from the same god that had casted Victim aside. The same god who now unwilling unleashed hell upon the lands.

Victim would have watched his new friends and family burn. He could have watched the horror happen right in front of him. He hates the hollows for what they did, reminding him of his past creator, of his past in general. Filled with grief and sorrows he wished to swallow down, but instead was forced to live with.

So he hatched a plan, one to be seen by us, but in my opinion? He’s already succeeded in half of his plan.

He has humiliated the so-called “God” “, “The Chosen One”, and “The Dark Lord” is dead. Two threats now no longer threats. Now all he needs to do is reach Alan.

.. but then what? What happens when the smoke clears, when Alan is gone? Will he return to his life before? Will he try to leave behind his men and venture on to finally find his peace? Will he feel complete or content with his decisions?

Will he finally feel okay to grieve? To cry for what he has lost? To hold the remains of what was his first real life? Will he feel remorseful to those he hurt along the way? Will he ever say sorry or forgive any who hurt him?

If you ask me, no. I don’t think he ever will say sorry or forgive anyone, and he has a right to. He was born to be nothing more then a Victim to other’s crimes. He was born to be nothing more then a Victim to other’s wrath. He never deserved to be hurt, he never deserved to be tormented by a god that should have loved him.

Victim deserved to be happy. He deserved to have friends, play games, venture to new lands, see the beauty of life and enjoy it. He deserved to be held as he cried, hugged closely when scared, and protected when threatened.

Victim, Vic, deserved to live, and not suffer.

but because of Alan’s actions, because of Dark and Chosen’s actions, he does.

and now it’s no longer Vic who’s becoming the Victim.

[simplykorra]

Looking at that gif of Ava (and good lord her shoulders) and every time I see it my heart breaks, she looks so tired. 😭

she does, and the saddest part is that this is really only the start of it for her

because after this she gets to kiss the girl she loves and then try to run away from her to protect her - breaking her own heart

then she fights adriel and lilith at the same time and they beat her up, but she keeps going and fights back. she beats adriel, but not before watching someone die right in front of her and then blowing herself up and almost dying

then she has to say goodbye to beatrice, again, and do the one thing she's openly told beatrice she was scared of the most - be alone

then she goes over to the other realm and is manipulated and lied to, could even be tormented and tortured into believing that reya is right all along and that the world needs to die and then she comes back and she's home, but her mind isn't right and everyone she loves can't see what she sees and is starting to turn against her

then beatrice shows up again and oh she loves bea so much, but bea is like the others - she thinks ava is broken and ava is so hurt by this, because she still feels alone and at this point ava is ready to end the world just so it will end her pain

but bea doesn't give up on her, and bea fights for her, in a way that no one in her life has ever fought for her and beatrice, along with ava's real family, pull her back from the darkness and show her the way and finally....finally, she's home and in bea's arms and that first night she's able to lay in bed with her and cry - she does for hours and beatrice holds her the entire time as she lets go of lifetimes worth of pain

[mariclerc]

Dad duties (pt.2) | cl16

Summary: where you meet an adorable dad and his little girl at the beach. Warning: none, single dad Charles, a bunch of kisses and pure fluff... And a somewhat kinda spicy surprise near the end + shy Charles at the end too.

a/n: this is a little too long, but I hope you like it. Let me know if you want another part of this!!

Part 1 Part 3

taglist 🤍 @mehrmonga @barcelonaloverf1life @sillyfreakfanparty

You find yourself waiting on the porch of your house, Charles had told you that he was going to be a little late since he was fixing some things with Ava, tonight is finally the famous date that you both had promised. The last few weeks have probably been the most fantastic of your life, the company of Charles and his little Ava make your days happier and brighter and that made you happy. You were so absorbed in your thoughts that you didn't realize that Charles was pulling up in front of your house, a smile already on your face.

“Hey y/n! You look incredible, so pretty, oh my...” He says as he gets out of the car, you were wearing a flattering dress, a little more dressed up than usual for your date night, you laugh slightly.

“Hey you handsome! Ready for our fancy dinner?” you say with a smile.

He smiles apologetically. “Uh... About that, there might be a slight change of plans.”

You both walk towards the car and he, like a gentleman, opens the passenger door for you, to which you thank him with a smile. You follow his gaze to the back seat, there, in a bright pink dress with white polka dots, sits Ava she beams at you, clutching a stuffed bunny, she giggles.

Your heart just melts, you weren't expecting Ava, but you can't help but smile even wider. “Hi there little princess! You look beautiful tonight!” You say happily.

Ava beams while Charles sighs apologetically. “Look, I'm so sorry babe. I couldn't find a babysitter on such a short notice and I was hoping maybe we could reschedule the dinner, but...” He was practically babbling, you cut him off.

You reach into the back and scoop Ava into your arms, tickling her belly. She erupts in delighted giggles.

“Charles, it's perfectly fine! Honestly, the more the merrier, don't you think? Besides who could say no to this cute little princess?”

Ava reaches out and tugs on your hair playfully. “Pwincess!” she giggled again and you nodded.

Charles looks surprised and relieved at your words. “You... You really don't mind babe?”

You glance at Charles, his eyes filled with warmth. “I don't mind at all darling! So... Where are we taking our little princess for dinner?” you asked softly while looking at him.

Charles throws his head back and smiled. “There's this great Italian place that has a fantastic kids' menu. Ava loves their pasta.”

You settle Ava back into her car seat, buckling her in. “Sounds perfect, Italian it is! Maybe she'll share some of her pasta with us?”

Charles leans over and gives you a quick kiss, you blush slightly. “Maybe... But you're definitely getting your own plate. This might be a date night with a little one in tow, but I still want to spoil you.” he winks at you.

“Just having you here is spoiling me enough.” you whisper softly. “Now, let's go get our little princess some dinner, I bet she's starving.”

You smile as Charles starts the car, his smile brighter than the restaurant lights ahead. You can't help but feel a warmth spread through you, this might not be exactly the date night you envisioned, but it's already shaping up to be something even better.

***

When you arrive at the restaurant the hostess leads Charles and you to a booth big enough for three with a high chair for Ava. The restaurant is super elegant, with soft music playing in the background.

Charles speaks smiling to Ava. “Alright, little one, what kind of pasta are you feeling tonight? They have farfalle shaped like butterflies, or penne that look like little tubes...”

Ava points excitedly at a picture on the kid's menu. “Bunny!” she giggles.

You and Charles look at the picture, then at each other and burst out laughing. “Looks like it's bunny pasta for the princess, I bet it's delicious!” You say with a smile on your face.

The waiter arrives, a friendly man with a neatly trimmed beard, Charles orders a glass of wine for you and a apple juice box for Ava, he also orders the bunny pasta for Ava, requesting it with a side of steamed vegetables. You order a light pasta dish and Charles gets something heartier. The conversation flows easily, sprinkled with stories about Ava's day and Charles' latest win on the track. You steal a glance at him while he chats whit Ava, noticing how his eyes crinkle when he smiles at his daughter.

“You're such a good dad, you know.” you say whispering.

Charles catches your eye and gives you a warm smile. “Thank you mon ange. Being a good dad is easy when you have a princess like her.” he whispers. (my angel)

While you wait for your food, you take out a small pack of crayons and a coloring book you brought from home. “Hey, Ava, want to color some pictures with me? See, this one has a cute bunny and another animals!”

Ava nods eagerly and starts coloring with delight. You watch her for a moment, then turn to Charles and you smile. “She's so much fun. I can't believe it's only been a few weeks...” you whisper softly.

Charles reaches across the table and takes your hand. “Me neither, you are amazing with her! You're even amazing to me.”

Just then, the waiter arrives with your food and drinks. You turn your attention to Ava, making sure she eats some vegetables before digging into the pasta.

The night continues like this - a delightful mix of conversation, laughter, a little spilled food, and genuine connection. While you might not have had the quiet, romantic dinner you initially planned, you find yourself enjoying this even more. It feels like the start of something special, a family you're slowly becoming a part of.

***

As the plates are cleared and Ava starts to get drowsy, Charles leans back in the booth.

“Looks like our little adventurer is ready for bed. What do you say we call it a night?” He says smiling as he holds Ava in his arms.

You nodded. “Looks like little miss enjoyed her bunny pasta a little too much, don't you think? We might be in for a long night... I can help put her to bed when we get home, I don't mind.” You say with a shy little smile.

Charles smiles, a hint of tiredness in his eyes. “Any help would be appreciated, you're a lifesaver, you know that?” he asked softly and you nod.

He throws his arm around your shoulder, pulling you close.

“So, how about we head straight home? Maybe we can watch a movie after Ava's asleep, just the two of us? How does that sound?” He asks you softly, the way his eyes hold yours makes the butterflies erupt in your stomach.

You smile once again. “Sounds like a perfect plan for me... Lead the way, papa.”

You two have a funny little argument about who pays the bill, but in the end he paid like a gentleman, and together you head out of the restaurant. The night air feels cooler now, but your heart is warm, as you walk side-by-side, Charles steals a kiss, quick and sweet, making butterflies explode in your stomach. You know this might be the beginning of something truly special, a messy, wonderful adventure with a charming single dad and his adorable daughter.

The car ride is filled with the soft snores of a sleeping Ava nestled in her car seat. Charles reaches over and squeezes your hand, a silent thank you for your help throughout the evening.

Pulling into his driveway, Charles helps you unbuckle Ava and carefully carries her inside. The house is quiet, bathed in a soft glow from a lamp left on in the living room, the white walls aren't so white anymore due to some colorful scratches on Ava's part, but it gives the place personality. Charles leads the way to Ava's room, a haven of pastel colors and stuffed animals.

“Alright, little one, it's bedtime. Let's get you out of those clothes, okay?” he whispers softly towards Ava.

He lays Ava gently on the changing table. You reach into the diaper bag that he had brought to dinner and pull out a pair of soft, pink pajamas with a fluffy bunny on the front.

You smile softly. “Looks like someone's favorite animal is making another appearance tonight.”

Charles chuckles, taking the pajamas from you. He expertly removes Ava's dress, careful not to wake her. You watch him with a lot of love and affection in your eyes, a comfortable silence settling around you both.

He started talking in a sing-along voice to Ava. “See, bunny pajamas for a sleepy bunny. Time for your warm snuggles, princess.” He slips the pajamas on Ava, who stirs slightly and lets out a contented sigh.

You help him to tuck Ava in. “She's so peaceful when she's asleep... You seem like a natural at this dad thing.”

Charles smiles, a touch of pride in his eyes. “Practice makes perfect, I guess. But having you here makes it a whole lot easier.” He leans in close, his gaze lingering on your lips. “Maybe after she's settled, we can have that movie night... just the two of us?” he whispers.

The air crackles with unspoken desire. You glance at Ava, a small smile playing on your lips. “Let's get her to sleep first, then we'll see. But don't expect a quiet night in. I might have some movie-related cuddles in mind.” you whisper back at him.

A slow grin spreads across Charles' face. He leans in and kisses you softly, the promise of more hanging in the air. Every time he kisses you it's like a dream, he is so sweet and delicate with you that it makes you sigh.

He smiles at you and whispers. “Sounds like a challenge I'm willing to accept.”

With a final goodnight kiss to Ava's forehead, you and Charles tiptoe out of the room, the quiet anticipation of a stolen moment hanging between you. Charles smiles at you, a silent thanks in his eyes. You return the smile, a pleasant tiredness settling over you.

“So... Movie night? Do you have any preferences?” he asks softly.

You shrug playfully and whisper. “Surprise me... Just something that doesn't require too much brainpower, I'm running in fumes after that mega dinner we had.” you let out a little giggle.

Charles chuckles and heads towards the living room and you follow him, collapsing onto the large couch with a contented sigh. He pops a movie into the DVD player, something light and comedic based on the box art.

The movie starts, and you snuggle up on the couch with a fluffy blanket, Charles sits beside you, leaving a comfortable gap initially. As the movie progresses, you find yourself drawn closer... You share a laugh at a funny scene, his arm brushing against yours, you don't shy away, instead leaning in slightly. He seems to mirror your movement, his warmth a comforting presence.

By the halfway point, you're practically cuddling, his arm wrapped loosely around your shoulders. You rest your head against his chest, his heartbeat a steady rhythm beneath your ear. The movie plays on in the background, but your focus has shifted.

Charles speak with a raspy and low voice. “You know, you're amazing with Ava. I don't know what I would have done tonight without you.”

You snuggle closer, a small smile playing on your lips. “She's a sweetheart! And besides, seeing you be a dad is pretty darn cute.” you whisper shyly.

He lets out a soft chuckle. “It's not always cute, you know? There are sleepless nights and mountains of undone laundry. But I swear, it's the most rewarding thing in the world.” He whispers as he looks at you sweetly.

A comfortable silence settles between you for a moment. Then, Charles takes a deep breath.

“Look, I know this might be crazy, but... it's late, and it's been a long day. Would you maybe consider staying the night? The guest room is all made up, and there's plenty of space on the couch if you'd prefer...” he says a little hesitant and even shy.

He trails off, waiting for your response. You turn in his arms, meeting his gaze. His eyes are full of hope, a hint of nervousness lingering in their depths.

You smile, a genuine warmth spreading through you. “Actually Charles... There was something I was thinking too...” You lean in closer, your lips brushing against his ear. “Maybe instead of the guest room or the couch, we could cuddle up in your bed and watch the rest of the movie? Movie-related cuddles, remember?” you whisper softly.

A slow grin spreads across Charles' face. He pulls you in for a kiss, deeper and more passionate than before. The movie fades into the background, the only sound your laughter and the promise of a night spent closer than ever before.

***

The movie credits roll, the sound barely registering over the soft snores coming from the baby monitor on the coffee table. You stretch languidly, the warmth of the blanket and Charles' arm wrapped around you making it hard to move.

He smiles sheepishly at you. “Wow, I don't know how we lost track of the movie. So much for brainpower, right?”

You chuckle, your eyes meeting his. There's a spark there, an unspoken invitation. “Maybe the movie wasn't that interesting after all. But hey, at least the company was good.” you smile playfully. “Oh, take this honey!” he says shyly and then walks over to a drawer and pulls out a soft, grey t-shirt. “This is probably a little big, but it's comfy! You're welcome to use any time you want.” he whispers.

You take the shirt, the fabric warm from his touch. It smells faintly of laundry detergent and something uniquely Charles.

“This is perfect, thank you Charlie! I think I can manage in a big, comfy t-shirt.” you giggle and smile.

He smiles back, his eyes holding yours. The air crackles with unspoken desire, the night stretching before you full of possibilities. He reach out to take your hand. “Then come on. Let's get you settled in, and maybe we can find a different kind of movie to watch... one that doesn't require a screen.”

He pulls you gently towards the hallway, his hand warm and strong in yours. Your heart races with a mix of excitement and nervousness. The hallway light casts a warm glow as you follow Charles. His hand remains clasped in yours, a silent invitation. You can practically feel the electricity crackling between you.

Reaching his bedroom door, Charles hesitates for a moment, then turns to you with a shy smile.

“Just a warning, my room might be a little messy, Ava has a habit of leaving her toys everywhere... So an apology if you find a colored build block or a stuffed animal on the floor.”

You squeeze his hand reassuringly. “Don't worry, I can handle a little mess, especially if it means more cuddles.” you say shyly.

He throws his head back and laughs, the sound warm and genuine. He pushes the door open, revealing a room that's undeniably lived-in. Clothes are scattered over a chair, a colourful build block and a stuffed bear lies abandoned on the floor. But amidst the slight disorder, there's a sense of warmth, safety and comfort in his bedroom.

He waves an apologetically hand at the mess. “Like I said... It's a little bit messy, but the bed it's made, at least.”

The bed dominates the room, a large king-size covered in a duvet the color of the sea, It looks impossibly inviting. You can't help but smile at the thought of spending the night snuggled up in it with Charles.

You smile. “The bed looks perfect. Thanks for offering the guest room, though. This is much more... spacious.”

He raises an eyebrow playfully while grinning. “Spacious enough for warm cuddles, I hope?”

You blush slightly, but hold his gaze. “We'll see about that, Mr. Leclerc... Now, where's the bathroom? I think I might need to change before those cuddles begin.” you say teasingly.

He points you in the right direction, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Take your time love, I'll be waiting... patiently... Although, no promises on how long that patience will last.” he giggled a little bit.

You wink at him before disappearing into the bathroom, your heart pounding with a mixture of excitement and anticipation. The night may not have gone according to plan, but it's turning into something far more special. The prospect of a night spent in Charles' bed cuddling, the promise of stolen kisses and whispered secrets, fills you with a happiness you haven't felt in a long time.

***

The bathroom door clicks shut behind you. You take a moment to splash some cool water on your face, trying to calm the nervous butterflies fluttering in your stomach. Slipping on Charles' oversized t-shirt, you steal a glance in the mirror. It hangs loosely on your frame, the scent of his laundry detergent clinging to the fabric.

Taking a deep breath, you step out of the bathroom. Charles is sprawled on the bed, the movie barely audible in the background. He glances up when you appear, a slow smile spreading across his face.

He smiles warmly at you. “Looking comfortable chérie. Ready for some more movie... or maybe something else?” (darling)

His eyes hold yours, the question hanging in the air. You walk towards the bed, a teasing smile playing on your lips. “Let's see what kind of mood this movie sets first. Maybe it'll inspire some cuddling, don't you think?”

He pats the space beside him on the bed, the duvet invitingly warm. You crawl in next to him, the familiar scent of his cologne filling your senses. He pulls the duvet over both of you, the space between you suddenly feeling too large.

As the movie plays on, you settle into Charles' side, your head resting comfortably on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around you, his touch sending shivers down your spine. You lose yourself in the quiet rhythm of his breathing and the steady beat of his heart against your ear.

The movie becomes a distant hum, the plot lines forgotten. You focus instead on the warmth radiating from Charles' body, the way his fingers gently brush against your arm. You steal a glance at him, his eyes already trained on you.

A slow smile spreads across your face. You lean in closer, your lips hovering a breath away from his. He closes the gap, the kiss soft and tender. It's a taste of what could be, a promise of something more.

You pull back, breathless.

“Maybe the movie can wait. How about we focus on some real-life entertainment?”

Charles chuckles, his voice a low rumble in his chest. “Sounds like a much better plan. Besides, I doubt this movie has anything on what we can do right here.” he said coquettishly.

He pulls you closer, his kisses becoming more insistent, more passionate. You melt into his touch, every thought of the movie forgotten. The only thing that matters now is the warmth of his body pressed against yours, the promise of a night spent tangled in his arms.

The movie plays on in the background, a silent observer to the unfolding scene. But neither of you cares. You're lost in your own world, a world of stolen glances, whispered secrets, and a growing intimacy that promises something truly special. As the night deepens, the movie fades into a distant memory, replaced by the intoxicating reality of a connection blooming under the soft glow of the bedside lamp.

You and Charles are caught in a heated embrace, the movie forgotten on the screen. The only sound is your own ragged breaths and the frantic pounding of your hearts. Just as Charles dips his head for another kiss, a faint sound pierces the air.

It's a whimper, barely audible, but unmistakable through the baby monitor nestled on the nightstand. You both freeze, pulled back from the brink of passion by the tiny sound.

Charles reaches over and turns up the volume on the monitor. The whimpers become clearer, accompanied by a soft snuffling sound.

“Sounds like Ava might be waking up...” he frowns slightly.

Disappointment flickers across his face, a mirror of your own feelings. You both know it's time to pull back, the night taking a different turn than anticipated.

You let out a soft sigh. “Maybe we should check on her, poor thing might be having a bad dream.”

Charles nods, a hint of frustration battling with his concern for his daughter. He leans in and gives you a quick peck on the lips.

He smiles apologetically. “Duty calls princess. Maybe we can pick this up where we left off later? After Ava's back to sleep, of course.”

You smile back, a touch of longing lingering in your eyes. “Of course darling, Ava comes first. But don't worry, I'm not going anywhere! Besides, a little mystery only adds to the fun, right?”

Charles lets out a soft laugh, the frustration melting away. He throws back the covers and gets out of bed, heading towards the door.

“You're right. Maybe this little detour will just make the reunion even sweeter. I'll be back soon babe.” he smiles.

He throws you a quick wink before disappearing down the hallway. You watch him go, a mix of disappointment and amusement swirling inside you. The night may not have gone exactly as planned, but the unexpected turn of events only adds to the growing connection you feel with Charles.

Settling back against the pillows, you pick up the remote and turn off the movie. The room falls silent, except for the faint hum of the baby monitor. You close your eyes, a smile playing on your lips. Maybe there's no need to rush things. After all, the best things in life often come when you least expect them.

***

You wait for Charles' return, the silence amplifying the soft hum of the baby monitor. Curiosity pulls you towards it, and you pick it up, placing the receiver near your ear. You hear the familiar sounds of Ava stirring in her sleep, little whimpers turning into soft murmurs.

Then, a gentle voice cuts through the static... It's Charles, his voice low and soothing as he speaks to his daughter.

“Hush little one, don't you cry, The moon is out, the stars are high. Close your eyes and drift away, Dreams of sunshine and flowers at play.” he sings softly through the monitor.

His voice washes over you, warm and comforting. You can picture him sitting on the edge of Ava's crib, rocking her gently as he sings. A pang of tenderness hits you, a glimpse into the protective and loving father Charles is. The whimpers gradually subside, replaced by the soft sounds of contented breathing. Charles speaks again, his voice barely a whisper.

“There you go, my little princess. Sleep tight, Daddy loves you so much.”

A lump forms in your throat. The tenderness in his voice sends shivers down your spine. You can't help but eavesdrop a little longer, yearning to be a part of this sweet moment.

After a few more minutes of silence, the bedroom door creaks open and Charles peeks in. He sees you with the baby monitor in hand, a soft smile gracing his lips.

“She's sound asleep, seems like my singing skills did the trick after all.” he whispers and smiles at you.

You blush, caught eavesdropping. You put the monitor back on the nightstand. “Guilty as charged... Your singing voice is impressive, Mr. Leclerc. Although, I'm not sure Ava fully appreciates your operatic skills yet.” you whisper softly and smiled at him.

He lets out a playful chuckle, walking towards the bed. “Maybe not... But, hey! At least she's asleep now.” he giggled. “Now... Where were we?” he whispers.

He reaches for you, his hand brushing against yours. You feel a warmth spread through you, the disappointment from before melting away.

“I believe we were about to explore some real-life entertainment. But this time, maybe with a little less noise... After all, we don't want to wake the princess again, do we?” you smile playfully.

Charles' smile widens, his eyes flickering with desire. He pulls you back into his arms, the promise of a stolen moment hanging heavy in the air.

The night may have taken a detour, but with Ava safely asleep and the connection between you growing stronger, it seems like a new chapter is about to begin. The adventure may be messy, filled with unexpected turns, but the prospect of exploring it with Charles fills you with a mix of excitement and anticipation. As you settle back into his embrace, you can't help but wonder where this unexpected journey will lead you both.

The soft glow of the bedside lamp casts a warm, intimate light on the scene as Charles pulls you back into his embrace. His touch is gentle yet insistent, his eyes sparkling with a mixture of amusement and desire.

He smiles and whispers again. “Absolutely not. Princess Ava deserves her beauty sleep... Besides, there are plenty of ways to have fun that don't involve waking the entire house.” He trails a finger down your arm, sending shivers dancing across your skin. You lean into his touch, a playful smile dancing on your lips.

“Oh, really? Do tell, Mr. Leclerc. Enlighten me on these... quieter forms of entertainment you have in mind.” you smile shyly while blushing.

Charles leans in close, his lips brushing against your ear. His voice is a low murmur, sending a delicious warmth through you.

“How about we explore each other, one slow touch at a time? See where the night takes us, without waking a single soul.” he whispers huskily.

His words ignite a spark within you, a thrilling mix of nervousness and excitement. You nod, your voice barely a whisper. “Sounds like a plan. But remember, we don't want to get too carried away. After all, Ava's room is just down the hall.”

A slow smile spreads across Charles' face. He tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his touch lingering.

He smiles shyly while blushing. “Don't worry bébé, I know how to control myself... to a certain extent. But trust me, this is going to be better than any movie we could watch... I promise.”

He dips his head for a kiss, this one slow and lingering. His lips move against yours, a delicious exploration that leaves you breathless. His hand trails down your back, sending shivers down your spine.

As the kiss deepens, you become acutely aware of the warmth of his body pressed against yours. The t-shirt you borrowed from him smells faintly of laundry detergent and something uniquely Charles, a scent that intoxicates you.

With a soft sigh, you pull away slightly, your heart pounding in your chest.

You say breathlessly. “Maybe we should start by turning off the light. A little darkness can add to the mystery, right amour?”

Charles lets out a low chuckle, the sound rich and warm. He reaches over and flicks off the bedside lamp, plunging the room into a comfortable darkness. The only light comes from the soft glow of the moon filtering through the window.

In the darkness, you feel Charles' hand find yours, his fingers intertwining with yours. It's a small gesture, but it sends a jolt of electricity through you.

He leans and whispers in your ear. “The night is young, and the possibilities are endless... Let's see where this adventure takes us.”

With that, he pulls you closer, his lips brushing against your neck. You know this is a path untrodden, a journey into uncharted territory. But with Charles by your side, the uncertainty is exhilarating. You close your eyes, surrendering to the moment, ready to explore the night and the deepening connection that binds you together.

***

The kiss breaks, leaving you breathless and wanting more. You rest your forehead against Charles' chest, your heart pounding a frantic rhythm against his ribs.

A moment of comfortable silence stretches between you. Then, Charles clears his throat, a hint of self-consciousness creeping into his voice.

“Listen babe, I just wanted to apologize. Maybe I came on a little strong there. It's just... well, it's been a while since I've had anyone in my bedroom, you know, other than Ava when she needs a middle-of-the-night cuddle or she has a fuss.” he mumble slightly.

He sounds embarrassed, the vulnerability in his voice a stark contrast to his earlier confidence. You reach up and cup his cheek, a sympathetic smile playing on your lips. “Hey, it's okay... I understand, It's been a while for me too. Besides, I don't blame you for getting a little carried away after that movie... or maybe it was the cuddles on the couch... Either way, there's no pressure. We can take things slow if that's what you want!” you smile again. “But honestly, your straightforwardness is kind of refreshing... No games, just genuine interest. And that's something I can appreciate.” you giggle softly.

A flicker of relief washes over Charles' face, followed by a slow smile.

“Really? You're not offended? Because honestly, the last thing I want to do is make you feel uncomfortable.” he sighs softly. “Slow sounds good, really good. But honestly, the thought of having you here all night, even if it's just for cuddles, is pretty darn amazing. It's been a long time since this place felt... well, alive.”

His words tug at your heartstrings. You understand the loneliness that comes with being a single parent, the longing for adult connection that can easily get overshadowed by the daily responsibilities.

You smile reassuringly. “Then consider yourself cuddled! Besides, I wouldn't want to leave you to face Ava's next potential night terror alone. Maybe I can even offer some expert advice on soothing a restless toddler. After all, I have a few nieces and nephews who keep me on my toes.”

Charles lets out a laugh, the sound warm and genuine. “Expert advice is always welcome, especially if it comes with a side of cuddles. Come here darling, just... Closer.”

He pulls you back into his arms, this time the embrace filled with a newfound tenderness. You rest your head on his shoulder, the sound of his heartbeat a comforting rhythm in the darkness.

The night may not have unfolded exactly as you planned, but as you settle into the warmth of Charles' embrace, you realize something unexpected... Sometimes, the best adventures are the ones that take you by surprise.

The night stretches before you, full of possibilities. There may not be any more passionate encounters, but the promise of a slow burn, a connection built on shared experiences and genuine connection, is far more enticing. You close your eyes, a contented sigh escaping your lips. You may not have gotten the fiery night you initially craved, but the prospect of a slow, sweet exploration with a charming single dad and his adorable daughter is a much more promising prospect.

[doomhands-jr]

The Devil's Advocate - Chapter 9

Pairing: Delinquent!Noah Sebastian X Pastor's Daughter!Reader

Summary: Noah is a delinquent with a lot of anger at the church. You're a pastor's daughter plagued by moral perfectionism, charged with overseeing the community service he's been sentenced to complete. You've never encountered true temptation before. How will you fare up against Noah, who not only isn't bound by the same rules of purity as you, but actively scoffs at them?

Rating: 18+ Minors DNI

Warnings: Underage drinking, partying,

Masterlist

Thanks to @throughwoodsanddirt for the beta

Thanks to @flowerynerds for the banner!

____________

“I don’t know about this,” you said as you attempted to close the clasp on the brown tweed miniskirt Ava insisted on dressing you in. Ava was about a full size smaller than you, so you were rightfully skeptical when she suggested (demanded) you let her pick out an outfit from her wardrobe. 

“Why not?” She asked in her whiney sing-song voice. “It’ll look so good!” 

“Because I can barely breathe,” you grunted, finally getting the clasp to close after laying on her bed and sucking in your gut.  

Ava crossed her arms, regarding the full outfit for a moment and then squinted. “Tough. You look amazing.” 

You sat up, feeling the slight pudge of your belly folding uncomfortably over the waistband of the skirt. The material had little give to it, cutting into your sides in a way you weren’t overly enthusiastic about. 

“Don’t worry, you can wear this over it,” she said, tossing an oversized black shirt your way. You swapped the one you were currently wearing for it, noticing it had a logo and artwork for a band you’d never heard of. It was cut wide at the neck so that it fell over one shoulder and showcased your sternum, plus a tiny bit of cleavage. Definitely more than you were used to showing. 

“Tuck it in,” she said. 

You rolled your eyes. “I just got this thing buttoned.” 

She didn’t respond, and you knew she wasn’t going to budge, so you huffed a sigh and fell back onto the bed, wrestling once again with the clasp. 

Ava stood next to the mirror on the door of her wardrobe, applying lipgloss and studying her own features to determine whether she was happy with her makeup before her maybe-date with Hera. 

“Are you planning on drinking tonight?” she asked, not looking up at you. 

“I don’t know,” you said, stuffing the hem of the shirt into your waistband. “I hadn’t really considered it.” 

“Do you think you’d be open to it if Nick offered you a drink?” She turned from the mirror to face you. 

You sucked in a deep breath and pulled the clasp of the skirt together, effectively hooking it. Sitting up, you found that the shirt was oversized enough to hide any belly rolls that poked out over top of your waistband. 

“Part of me is thinking about it,” you confessed. It was true. Throughout your life, you’d been staunchly against the idea of underage drinking, but you were about to turn 21 at the end of the month, and didn’t see much of a point to waiting. “Nick said he’d be by my side all night, and I trust him to take care of me.” 

Ava smiled softly. “Good. He’s a good guy. You deserve some fun. Oh!” she exclaimed, setting down the tube of lip gloss on her desk and rifling through one of her drawers. “That reminds me. I wanted to give you these.” 

She took out a small handful of foil packets and slipped them your purse. 

“Are those…condoms?” you asked. 

“Yes,” she said, “and I don’t want to hear anything about it. You never know when something might happen. I trust Folio to not take advantage of you, but you still need to be prepared.” 

You sat for a moment, blinking stupidly at Ava. 

Twenty-four hours ago, you were singing in a church. Today, you were considering underage drinking and accepting condoms from your best friend. 

It seemed like your life was shifting from one extreme to the next rapidly—literally overnight. But then again, the changes had been happening inside of you for a long time now. Perhaps this was just the manifestation of those changes? 

“Okay,” you said, nodding once to Ava, who flashed a self-satisfied smile before going back to the mirror to once-again tweak her makeup. 

“When did you buy these?” you asked. 

“Before the semester started,” she said, adding another coat of mascara to her naturally long lashes. 

That long ago? You’d half-expected her to say that she purchased them after the Halloween party, when she lost her virginity. The fact that she’d done it before meant Ava, too, had been going through a sort of religious deconstruction for a while now, and you were only beginning to see the effects of it. 

For some reason, you were comforted by the fact. It let you know that she had been prepared to lose her virginity that night with Nick, and it wasn’t just an impulsive decision, but one she had been thinking about for a while. 

“You think you’ll do anything with Hera if she asks?” 

Ava flushed, offering one of the most timid smiles you’d ever seen from her. “Honestly? I’d let that woman run me over with a truck if she wanted.” 

“You’re down pretty bad, huh?” you asked, finding immense joy in how much your friend was crushing. If you couldn’t find success in your own love life, at least you could live vicariously through her. 

Ava said nothing, but clutched at her chest with both hands and stared dreamily out the window, face slackened by a rather love-drunk smile. 

It was hard to be upset by all the events in your life when things were going so right for Ava. She so deserved this happiness, and her joy was easily rubbing off on you. 

“Oh, crap! What time is it?” she asked, breaking out of her stupor. 

You looked at your phone. “Seven fifty-six.” 

“Okay,” she said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ears. “She said she’ll be here at eight fifteen. What time is Nick picking you up?” 

“Not sure yet,” you said, hopping off her bed and into the pair of black combat boots she was letting you borrow for the night. As if on cue, your phone vibrated. It was Nick. 

“He’s asking if he should come to my room.” 

“Tell him to just meet you here,” she said. “It’s closer.”  ________

It didn’t take Nick long before he arrived at Ava’s door. He greeted her with a warm hug and kiss on the cheek as if they were old friends. 

“Good to see you again,” he said, smiling. 

“Promise to take care of our girl?” she asked, teasing lilt coating her normal voice. 

Nick scoffed, hand splaying over his chest. “You should have more faith in me by now.” 

Ava chuckled, batting lightly at his shoulder. “She’s my best friend. I have to give you at least a little bit of shit, just to keep you on your toes.” 

He smiled, wrinkling his nose at her. “I guess I should be honored then, that you’re even allowing me to take this fine woman out on the town.” 

He gestured to you without looking away from Ava. You watched their interaction with amusement. They reminded you of an old married couple, or perhaps a father grilling his daughter’s new boyfriend before their first date—with Ava playing the role of the father. 

“You sure I can’t convince you to come out?” he asked, grabbing her hand and bringing it up to his lips to kiss. He was indeed charming, you’d give him that. 

Ava flicked her hand out of his grasp and patted him affectionately on the cheek. “You know I would, but I’ve got bigger and better things in store tonight.” 

Nick winced playfully, clutching his hands to his chest. “You’re breaking my heart, Ava.” She smiled at him affectionately. 

It was easy to see why things between the two of them had progressed so quickly. They were two sides of the same coin—both dramatic, whimsical, and charismatic. You also saw why you got along with both of them so well. 

A knock sounded at your door, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen. Ava immediately grew nervous, bouncing once on her heels before rushing over to the door to answer it. 

Nick finally turned his attention to you, eyebrows shooting up towards his forehead. That was all the time he had to react, however, before Ava pulled her date into the room to introduce her. 

Hera was one of the most beautiful women you’d ever seen. She wore a cropped white shirt under a set of green cotton overalls. Her gold jewelry complemented the deep complexion of her skin, which was decorated by tattoos that ran like vines down her arms and around her fingers. 

She smiled wide, displaying a set of perfectly white teeth. Her thick, tightly-coiled hair was worn naturally, fanning out around her face in a large dome with a silk scarf around the base. 

“I’m Hera,” she said extending her hand out to yours and you grasped it firmly while you introduced yourself. 

She turned to introduce herself to Nick and you locked eyes with Ava. ‘Oh my God,’ you mouthed. 

‘I know, right?’ she mouthed back. 

Hera didn’t stay long. She and Ava were quick to leave, wanting to get to their event on time, but she looked genuinely sorry she couldn’t stay and get to know you better. 

“Well,” said Nick after the two of you had followed their lead and exited the building, “I’d say I’m jealous, but I’m mostly just impressed. Who knew Ava could pull a ten like that?” 

“Ava’s already a ten,” you said, “but yeah, I really hope it works out for her. She seems to really like her.” 

“Speaking of tens,” Nick said, taking you by the hand and twirling you around on the empty sidewalk. 

You chuckled. “Ava insisted on dressing me.” 

“She has good taste,” he said, letting his eyes drift down your body and back up. He held out his arm for you to grab and led you down the sidewalk. 

“I should have guessed. I didn’t take you for a Norma Jean fan,” he said. 

“Who?” 

He let out a laugh. “Your shirt. The band on it is Norma Jean. They’re metalcore.” 

“Oh,” you said, flushing. You probably should have asked Ava more about the band in case anyone recognized them. 

“The fishnets are a nice touch, I have to say,” he continued, looking down at your legs. 

“I was skeptical about them, but I really like how they look,” you admitted, following his gaze down.  You’d protested the fishnets at first, but once you saw the finished look in Ava’s full-length mirror, you were surprised by just how much you were into it. It was sexier than you’d ever dressed before, but in a welcome way (though you had insisted on wearing yoga shorts under the skirt just for safety). 

“I like the new look,” he said. “You should keep it.” 

“Yeah?” you said, flattered by his honesty. “I might.” 

“Good.” 

It didn’t take long for the two of you to arrive at Jolly’s house. Technically, his party didn’t start for another hour or so, but several people were already there helping set up. 

“I thought we could pre-game here,” Nick said, turning to face you and walking backwards as he led you across the front porch. He opened the screen door for you and gestured for you to make your way through. 

Several men crowded around a kitchen island. One—you recognized as Jolly—poured out several shot glasses’ worth of clear liquor. 

“Are you drinking?” Nick asked, guiding you towards the kitchen with a gentle hand on your back. The floor was just as sticky as last time, and you wondered if it had ever seen a mop, but tried not to focus on that because you’d rather not start the party off by being critical. 

“I was thinking about it,” you admitted meekly, looking up to him for guidance. You were already feeling shy and none of the other guests had even looked at you. 

“Have you drank before?” he asked. You shook your head no. “Okay, so my recommendation is to start off with something weak. One shot, watered down with a lot of mixer. Most people start with vodka. Is that something you’d like to try?” 

You said nothing but nodded to him. 

“Want me to make it for you?” he asked. 

“Yes please,” you said, moving closer to the table to observe how everyone else was behaving. Nick squeezed your shoulder before heading over to the fridge and pulling out a two-liter of cola. 

“Jolly, mind if I steal some mixers?” he called over his shoulder. 

“Take whatever you want,” said Jolly, passing out the shots he’d just poured to the guys around the table. “We’re doing shots. You in?” 

“Yeah if you’ve got one to spare.” 

Jolly smiled, pouring out one more shot and handing it over to Nick, who kicked the fridge door shut behind him and took the shot from Jolly. 

“Here’s to a good party!” Jolly said, and the rest of the men echoed the sentiment, raising their shot glasses to the ceiling before tapping them on the table and finally downing them. 

Nick winced only a little, recovering quickly and grabbing the bottle of Vodka from where it sat beside Jolly. He busied himself making you a drink and returned shortly after.

“Try that,” he said, handing you the red solo cup. You took a tentative sip, unsure of what to expect, but you were pleased to find it tasted mostly like regular cola, only with a hint of something sharper. 

“Will this get me drunk?” you asked after you’d swallowed the first mouthful. 

He smiled, chuckling at you and you got the sense that you’d asked a stupid question. 

“Not if you stick to just that. Maybe three of those would, but I’m not gonna let you get drunk at your first party.” 

“Thanks,” you said, trying to convey your gratitude without seeming overly needy or like you wanted your hand held—even though you did. 

You smiled while Nick introduced you to the other men at the table—two of which you already knew as Jolly and Ruffilo, but it was nice to meet them again. The other two, Matt and Bryan, looked very similar to the rest of them in style. Long hair, black oversized band shirts, and tattoos decorating their limbs. 

As other people began to arrive, you started to recognize this as a sort of uniform for the men. Each had their own version of the same style and you wondered whether it was a sort of status symbol—who could fit the most ink on their bodies and grow their hair out the longest. 

Most of the women also sported a number of tattoos, though usually not as many as the men. Many flaunted intricate sternum tattoos, displayed under cropped tank tops and bralettes and paired with high-waisted black shorts. 

Looking down at your own outfit, you acknowledged that Ava was right to dress you the way that she did. Her outfit helped you blend into the crowd much better than you would have if you’d gone with your normal clothes—despite the lack of ink. 

Nick nudged his elbow into your side. You looked to find him smiling down at you. “Wanna play beer pong?” 

“What is that?” you asked. His close-lipped smile morphed into a toothy grin and he grabbed your hand to lead you through the throng of people to the back deck, where a card table was set up and several red plastic cups were arranged in two triangles on either end. The crowd had not yet spilled out onto the deck, so the two of you were the only ones there, save for a few people smoking around the fire pit in the back yard. 

Briefly, you glanced over at the shed that housed Noah’s studio, wondering if he’d been in there at all lately. 

“Normally,” Nick began, brining your attention back to the table in front of you, “you’d play this in teams, but since we’re the only ones here, we’ll play against each other.” 

“Okay,” you said, nodding. “What do we do?” 

“See that ping pong ball over there?” he said, pointing to one of the cups, where an orange ball floated atop a small amount of water. “Your goal is to get that in one of my cups. We take turns. A lot of the time, people will fill the cups with beer, and say I get a ball in one of your cups, you’d have to drink the beer in it.” 

“Oh,” you said, starting to understand the rules. 

“But since it’s just water in these, the rule is you have to take a sip of your drink whenever I get it in the cup.” 

“It’s a good thing we aren’t playing with beer then,” you said. He laughed and agreed. 

“Want to go first?” he asked, smile still lighting up his face. 

“Sure,” you laughed. You’d never have described yourself as coordinated. Your high school hadn’t focused much on teaching physical fitness. They were more concerned with drilling Bible verses into your heads. On top of that, there weren’t enough students for any sort of competitive team sport. Still, you were willing to go out of your comfort zone tonight and actually participate. 

You tossed the ball towards his end. It bounced off the edge of the table, and Nick caught it in his hand. “Whoops!” you said. 

“No worries,” he replied, holding the ball up and aiming it for your end of the table. He tossed it and it sank easily into one of the center cups. “Now you gotta drink.” 

You smiled, already anticipating how the rest of this game was about to go, but sipped your drink nonetheless in preparation for your turn. 

Your intuition was correct after all. You’d managed to get exactly two of his cups before he’d hit all of yours, thus ending the game. By that point, you’d had enough of your drink to start feeling the effects. 

“What are you giggling about?” Nick asked from across the table, where he stood repositioning the cups back into their pyramid shape.

“Nothing,” you said, trying to suppress a smile. 

“You’re tipsy, aren’t you?” he said, and you tucked your lips between your teeth and nodded at him. He walked around to your side of the table and helped you reset the cups on your end. “How’s it feel?” 

“Nice,” you admitted. “I wasn’t sure what to think, but I can see why people like it.” 

Nick turned, clapping both your shoulders with his hands, regarding your state. Your giggles returned under his gaze and the bright lights of the porch began to grow softer. A pleasant warmth washed over you. 

“That’s the danger of it,” he said, thumbs rubbing soft circles into your skin. “People get too invested in that feeling and end up letting it take over. Promise me you’ll pace yourself?” 

You got the sense he’d seen it happen firsthand and that it hadn’t ended well, so you nodded, even though you didn’t feel like you were in danger of losing control. His concern was touching and it was probably a good idea to listen to his advice. 

“How about drinking a glass of water first before you have another drink?” he asked. “Alcohol dehydrates you.” 

“Thanks,” you said, and allowed him to lead you by the hand back into the house, towards the kitchen. His hand was warm and comforting, and necessary because the alcohol was affecting your balance in ways that were unfamiliar to you. You were overcome by your gratitude for him, recognizing that you’d be absolutely lost on how to enjoy the party if he weren’t there to guide you. Perhaps it was the alcohol affecting you, but you reckoned you’d still feel that way, even if you were completely sober. 

It wasn’t long before he was called over by a group of friends to play a game of flip cup. You’d never heard of it before, but he invited you to watch and explained the rules for you to understand, even though it was straightforward and you probably would have picked it up just by watching. 

He was third out of the four people that line his side of the table. It took him three tries to get his cup to land, and when it did, you cheered along with the rest of his team, who ended up losing by a few seconds. 

It quickly became clear that with all these drinking games, nobody actually cared who won or lost. The goal was just to bond, drink, and have something to do. That made you feel more at ease when someone at the table—Bryan you thought his name was—proposed a second game and asked if you wanted to play. 

Recognizing that this was an opportunity for you to be included, not just in the game but as a peripheral member of the friend group, you agreed. 

“Okay, so all you gotta do is wait for your turn, chug as fast as you can, set the cup facedown on the edge of the table and get it to land,” Nick whispered in your ear from where he stood behind you as Bryan began filling the cups for the next round. Your ear tingled where his breath fanned across it. He was so close you could feel the heat radiating off him. You wanted to lean into it, and for once, rather than second guess yourself, you follow the urge. He reciprocated by placing his hands on your elbows. “Focus on chugging and getting it in position for the flip. The rest is up to you.” 

His chin rested on your shoulder as he spoke, and though you didn’t actually need his advice, his presence was more than welcome because you were still nervous. His fingertips braced either side of you, holding you in a starting position as if he were a coach, which he may as well have been. 

“Go!” Bryan shouted and the first person was up—a woman with black hair, several tattoos, and a septum ring. She easily downed her drink and got her cup to flip on the first try. Up next was Ruffilo, who was already a little tipsy and like Nick, took three tries for the cup to stick the landing. When it was your turn, Nick pushed you forward by the hips, chanting ‘go, go, go,’ as you attempted to chug the drink. 

You’d never tasted beer before, and you chugged it so fast you could barely register what it tasted like before it was gone and you had to focus on flipping it. You set it on the edge of the table and flipped it with the ends of your fingers, but miscalculated how much force you’d need and overshot it. 

The cup clattered across the table, but you didn’t have time to be embarrassed. You reset it on the edge, adjusting your approach and used less force this time. It landed. Nick cheered as you backed away from the table. He wrapped his arms around you from behind and hoisted you up into the air, celebrating the small success. You yelped, feeling quite accomplished and grateful for his enthusiasm, but also quite uncomfortable considering the beer you’d just chugged and the pressure he was putting on your swollen stomach. You let out a loud belch as soon as he let you down, and both laughed about it after. 

The person after you, Matt, chugged his and got it in two tries as well, and this time, your team won. Matt offered you a firm high-five, grasping your hand in triumph for a brief second, before turning to Bryan and asking him if he wanted to play another round. 

They invited you to play a second time, but you declined, thanking them for the offer. The aftertaste of the beer had finally caught up to you now that the adrenaline of competition wore off and you realized that it wasn’t your drink of choice. 

“You finish your water?” Nick said, leaning in towards you now that the party was in full swing and the music was too loud to talk casually over. 

“Yep,” you said, nodding proudly. 

He flashed a grin. “Good. Want another drink?” 

“Please,” you said and stepped aside to the counter where the liquor had been moved. 

“Want to try coconut rum?” he asked after perusing the available option, and you agreed because it sounded yummy. As he mixed the drink, you observed the rest of the party. The house was full of people by that point. Another game of flip cup had started in the kitchen, and the living room had been converted into a makeshift dance floor. 

A pungent aroma wafted up from the stairs leading to the basement, and if you had to guess, you’d say that’s where people went to smoke weed. 

“Here,” Nick said, and held out a cup for you. You took it gratefully and sipped.

“I like this one better than the last,” you admitted, savoring the taste of coconut. 

“What?” he shouted over the music. 

“I said I like this one better,” you shouted back. He smiled and shook his head, indicating he still couldn’t hear you. 

He yelled something that sounded like ‘come with me,’ and grabbed your had once again, this time leading you up the stairs and into one of the bedrooms. It was still loud, but more isolated from the rest of the party. 

He sat his drink down on a desk and strolled over to the window, shoving the bottom pane up so it was open to the night air before picking his drink back up and holding out his hand. 

“Care to join?” 

You stepped forward tentatively, peering out of the window to see that it opened up onto the roof of the front porch. 

You took his hand, allowing him to guide you through the open window first before he crawled through. It was a bit of a tight squeeze, but once you were outside, the chill of the cold December night was welcome, considering how stuffy the house had become. 

It was a dry cold. There was no snow on the ground and only a light breeze, but already your legs began to feel the sting of chill. 

“So, how’s your first party experience?” he asked, sitting beside you on the asphalt shingles. 

“Technically, this is my second,” you reminded him. 

He chuckled, taking a sip from his drink and savoring it before replying. “That first one doesn’t count.” 

“Why not?” you asked, sipping from your own drink. 

“Because you didn’t actually get introduced to the party scene. I partly blame myself, because I was hanging out with Ava. But I also blame Noah.” 

This was the first time Noah’s name had been mentioned between the two of you since everything had gone down two weeks ago. It still stung, but the alcohol softened the pain. 

“Why’s that?” you asked, turning to face him more. 

“Because he should have helped you get your bearings,” he said, drunkenly gesturing with his hands as he spoke. “He knew you hadn’t been to a party before. And yeah, I know that he was busy getting ready for the show, but I still think he could have taken a little more time for you.” 

You hadn’t thought of it that way. Both Nick and Noah were to blame. Nick, because he’d invited you in the first place, but also Noah, because you’d been closer with him. At least Nick was taking steps to make up for it. 

Truthfully, nobody had ever helped you assimilate into a group of people the way Nick had that night. You’d always been left alone to fend for yourself and figure out your own way to fit in. 

Not that you’d ever truly fit in, except perhaps at church camp. But that was far behind you now. You’d already changed enough that you knew if you went back, you’d no longer fit in with the rest of them. Nor would you fit in at church anymore. 

And perhaps you’d struggled so much because you’d never had anyone to show you the ropes. 

You shook your head, ridding yourself of the negative thoughts. You didn’t want to dwell on the past. It was better to be grateful for what you had in front of you at the moment. 

You took another sip of your drink while Nick took another sip of his. 

“I don’t know how you can drink beer,” you commented. “It’s disgusting.” 

He smiled, swallowing his drink and then let out a soft chuckle. “You get used to it after a while,” he said. “I didn’t like it when I first tried it, but now I do.” 

“I guess it’s an acquired taste, then,” you commented. 

He nodded, taking another sip. “This isn’t beer though,” he said once he’d swallowed. 

“Oh?” you asked, looking away from him and onto the street below, where a couple of people stood near the sidewalk smoking cigarettes and chatting. “What is it?” 

“Jungle juice,” he answered. You looked back to him. 

“What’s that?” you asked. 

He held out his cup to you. “Want to taste?” 

You took it, cold fingers brushing over his warm ones as he passed the cup to you. You peered inside first to see a greenish liquid with bits of fruit floating in it. You sniffed, noting that it smelled like sprite, something fruity, and something else that stung at your nostrils. 

Tentatively, you sipped, taste buds immediately lighting up at the onslaught of flavor. 

“That’s delicious. What’s in that?” you asked. “And can I have some?” 

Nick laughed. Not just a chuckle but a big belly laugh. “No, I’m not giving you jungle juice for your first drink,” he said. 

You pouted. 

“Don’t give me that look. This is way stronger than it tastes. That cup alone probably has four shots of liquor in it. Jolly makes his extra strong.” 

“What all does he put in it?” you asked, taking another sip of your own drink. You were definitely feeling the effects of the alcohol and it made your skin tingle pleasantly while a warm feeling crept up your neck. 

“I think it’s sprite, Hawaiian punch, a bunch of different fruit juices, and then vodka, rum, and I think he does triple sec too.” 

You blinked at him, tempted to ask what triple sec was because you’d never heard of it, but thought better. You were tired of outing yourself as not knowing anything, so instead you took another gulp of your drink. 

“Slow down,” he cautioned. You pursed your lips and side-eyed him. “I’m not trying to be a buzz kill,” he said clinking his cup with yours and downing another gulp. “I just want to make sure it doesn’t hit you all at once.” 

“What happens then?” you asked, taking another small sip. Perhaps he was right, considering you’d downed two-thirds of your drink during your short conversation. 

“You probably won’t get the spins, since there still isn’t a ton of alcohol in your drink,” he said. “But pacing yourself is a good habit to get into anyway.” 

“Why’d you invite me tonight?” you asked, surprising yourself with the question. 

He didn’t answer right away, just pressed his lips together in a smile and looked down at his drink.  

“I don’t approve of Noah’s actions,” he admitted. “I mean, I’m no saint by any means. I’m probably worse than him, but I feel like you deserved better than what he gave you.” 

You didn’t expect him to be so forthcoming, and when the moment became unexpectedly heavy, you had to look away from him and back to the street below, noticing how the streetlights reflected off the cars lining the curb. Everything was a little hazy, tempered by the alcohol. 

“I thought he’d treat me differently, too,” you confessed. You didn’t want to say too much more than that, because you knew if you talked about your feelings, you’d end up crying, and that’s the last thing you wanted to do at the moment, especially with how much effort Ava had put into your makeup. 

“I wanted to give you a fun night. Introduce you to our crowd so you can get a better idea of what life is like outside of Sunday school. Show you that it’s not all hellfire and brimstone like you were taught.” 

“Thank you, Nick,” you said, nudging his elbow with yours. “That means a lot.” 

You wanted to say more, but knew that if you got too much deeper, it would ruin the party vibe the two of you had worked hard to build. 

“Noah will come around eventually,” he said, apparently not quite ready to let the subject go, even though you thought you were doing him a favor by giving him an easy out and cutting it short. 

Not having anything much else to say, you simply shrugged. “Even if he doesn’t, I’ll be okay.” 

Nick smiled. “That’s the spirit,” he said, holding out his cup to cheers. You tapped yours against it and he chugged the rest of his drink. You followed his lead, in direct contradiction to his previous advice and let out another burp as soon as you finished. He chuckled at that. 

“Want the fruit?” he asked, offering his cup to you. There was a small pile of strawberries, blueberries, and pineapple at the bottom. “It soaks up the alcohol and gets you drunker.” 

“I thought you said you weren’t gonna let me get drunk,” you said. 

He shrugged. “It’s your first party. I’ll make sure you sober up before the end of the night.” 

You thanked him, taking the glass and dumping the contents into your mouth. You could barely taste the alcohol in them as you chewed, but you hadn’t been tasting alcohol since partway through your last drink. 

Nick stood up, brushing dirt off the back of his pants, and held out a hand to you. You did the same, stumbling only slightly as you climbed back through the window and landed in the bedroom. Nick followed, shutting the window behind the two of you. 

“Wanna dance?” he asked.  ________

The alcohol fully hit while you were on the dance floor. It was a difficult sensation to describe, but it had you feeling alive. Sweat-soaked bodies pressed up against you from all sides, and you writhed to the music freely in the knowledge that nobody was paying attention to you. You weren’t an individual anymore, but part of a whole. One drop in a sea of moving bodies. 

Hands gripped your hips. You glanced over your shoulder and found Nick’s face hovering near yours. 

“This okay?” he whispered into your ear. “Yeah.” 

His fingers dug lightly into your side, pressing you into him. Briefly, you registered that this was the most physical contact you’d had with a man. 

His chest rested against your back, and with his hands, he guided your hips to sway to the music, moving his body to match yours. 

“Have you danced like this before?” he asked, lips nearly brushing your ear. You shook your head no, nerves sparking to life underneath your skin and ricocheting around your system. Your stomach twisted in a knot, but you chose not to focus on that and instead keep your mind trained on the steady bass pounding through the speakers. You wanted more, so you leaned into him. He reciprocated by clutching harder at your hips. 

Half of you was present in your body, registering his fingertips, his body pressed tightly against yours, the sweat dripping down your sternum. The other half of you existed in a separate plane above the dance floor, somewhere between the heavy house music and the flashing neon lights. 

Nick grabbed your waist, spinning you around to face him and slotted a thigh between yours. He wrapped his arm around your lower back and pressed you tightly into him and this was now the closest you’d ever been to a man. 

Feeling for the first time like you had finally tapped into your own sexual energy, you allowed and welcomed it to course through you uninhibited, swiveling your hips on your own accord against him and surrendering entirely to your body and however it wanted to move in the moment. 

A thread connected you and Nick. You were on the same wavelength, and whatever energy guided you also guided him. You moved as one, rolling against each other to the music, your sweat mixing with his. 

You threw your head back, closing your eyes and inhaling the sensations of the party. 

You’d lost yourself like this before, but it had always been in a religious setting, losing yourself in what you perceived as the divine energy of God, during a particularly moving prayer or worship song. Often in a group setting. 

Now, you were losing yourself in what you could the divine energy of the collective. The book of Romans, chapter 12 verse 2 stated to not conform to this world, and that verse was pounded into your head over and over again by the church. 

But what if the book of Romans got it wrong? What if this world was Holy too, and it was necessary to fully experience it? Why reject God’s creation? Why not rejoice in it? 

A hand on the back of your neck brought you back to reality. 

“We’re just friends, right?” said Nick, eyes blown wide as he looked at you. “You don’t have any feelings for me?” 

“Yeah,” you said, trying to adjust to how close his face was. “Just friends. Why?” 

He nodded. “Good. Just wanted to make sure we’re on the same page for this.” 

And then his lips were on yours.  ________ Next chapter coming soon! Taglist: @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @hoe-for-daddywise @concretejungle420 @sleep-worship @cncohshit @adenobabe @guacinyourarea @escapingourexistence @livingdeceasedgirl @chxrryxox @dem11 @starcrossedwasteland @alm0std3add @reyadawn @karenfranco @glam-cherry-bomb @simpingforniragi @koalakoala8 @themorticians-world @sleepytoken99 @magdalenaxbrenaxorestes. @fuck-me-muke @xmads-omensx @just-randomm-stuff @spookychaosstranger @gravitysembrace @somebodyels3 @klutzy-kay24 @sundamariis @noahsebastions @cyber-tiny @xxkittenkissesxx @treacheryinblue @flowerynerds @1toreyouapart @badomensls @rain-down-on-me @ilovemewwwww75 @poisongirl616 @adenobabe

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[mmelionsblog]

SHE’S MINE. [Sam Golbach x Reader x Colby Brock]

warnings: possessive!samuel, jealous!samuel, mad!samuel, reader does get attacked sadly in this one-shot 😔 so be careful reading this! (SA— if you don’t know what that means it means sexuality assaulted),

((Part ONE))

It was another night in a different suburban neighborhood, your hands were tightened around a red solo cup. Your best friend, Ava, decided to throw a party in honor of you getting a promotion at your job (yet people just went just to get fucked up). You were supposed to go with your boyfriend Sam, but he and his best friend got caught up with something an hour before the party started.

You were probably on your third cup of whatever alcohol you were having, not even tipsy. Whoever brought this alcohol was definitely a light weight and have no good taste in real drinks, you were a bit sad about it, but at least you’ll still be sober when your boyfriend comes in.

“Wooo!” Your friend yelled, taking a shot and flipping it over and going to the next one on the white table. There was lots of shots on said table, one for your friend, one for the person she was competing with to get to the end of the table without getting fucked up. As soon as your friend finished, she had to do five spinning circles at the end and land with two feet standing up. She was so close, until she fell on one of the guys that came to the party.

“Woah there!” The guy said laughing, she laughed along with him. You walk your way over to the two, greeting the guy and having conversation. The conversation got heated with Ava and the said guy; so you went over to the kitchen to let them have their own thing going on. You were happy for her, only because she never has any guys coming into her life.

You were about to get your fourth or fifth drink of alcohol, you weren’t sure, when all of a sudden a tall blonde came up to you. It was definitely not your boyfriend, and definitely a guy you’d try to ignore. “Hey there cutie,” he started.

You gave him a look, “I have a boyfriend.” You flat out spoke. “I can’t call you cute?” He scoffed with a smile, his arm resting on the fridge and leaning towards you. “No, because I do not know you.” You said. “Well, my name is Dylan. What’s your name?” He gave you his hand to shake, and you didn’t do it in return.

You ignored him once again, trying to get out of the kitchen when only he blocked your path. Your eyes widened, “Will you please move? I’m trying to get back to my friend.” You huffed out. “Oh come on, I know you want a piece of me.” His words slurred, and he attached himself onto you.

You yelped, slapping his shoulder as his head dived into your neck. You cried out, but because of the music being so loud nobody could really hear you. You felt his lips attach your neck and that’s when you really started to scream, kick, and yell out for help.

“Shut up, quit being a pick me girl. You know you like this,” you felt his voice vibrate off of yours. You scoff at his words, unable to speak with the tears coming down your cheeks. You keep yelling, trying to push him off as his hands started to roam your body.

Sam finally made his way to the party. He greeted his friends that were already there, Colby walking off to who knows where. He headed inside, hearing the familiar song he was just playing in his car.

He smiled at the people around him, greeting, and then seeing the host of the party. “Ava!!” He yelled, hugging her tightly. “What’s up Sammmmeeeyyy?” She yelled, rocking back and fourth with the music. He laughed, and then his eyes wandered. His eyebrows furrowed. Where were you?

“Hey, where’s (y/n)?” He yelled over the music, “I dunno… I think she went to the kitchen!” She yelled, he nodded and walked that way. He felt his smile growing, he hasn’t seen his girlfriend since 1 and it’s barely getting to 12 am. It’s been a long, stressful day and all he wanted to do was be with his loving girlfriend and relax at a party that was made for her.

Sam’s smile dropped when he heard his girlfriend. He knew that scream, he knew that crying. He ran quicker to the kitchen, and he immediately saw red.

He screamed, “get the fuck off of my girlfriend!” As loud as he could, people around stopped talking and watched from afar, seeing the smaller blonde tear the random guy off of the poor girl who was crying and struggling for the past ten minutes.

The music suddenly stopped playing, everyone was gathering around the kitchen as soon as they heard the sound of a slap. Ooo’s and aah’s could be heard from across the room, as Sam punched the ever living soul out of the guy that was sexually assaulting you.

You backed up into the corner, a hand on your mouth as you sobbed. Ava, now sober as ever, ran to your side and hugged you tightly. The only ever time you saw Sam like this, was at the 10 million subs party and it wasn’t as bad as this was.

Corey and Colby came rushing in from the back, shoving people as they reached the scene. “Oh shit…” Corey whispered, Colby wasted no time to grab ahold of Sam and wrap his arms around his best friend’s waist. “What the hell happened dude?” Colby asked. “This— this- this— this guy was—was touching her!” Sam yelled angrily, his cheeks were stained with tears already going down his face. Colby’s eyes darkened to the guy who laid lifeless on the checkered floor. Sam did a number on him, but Colby didn’t.

Corey grabbed ahold of Sam as his best friend shoved him that way, Colby got the guy’s bloodied white shirt with his fist, and punched him right in the nose. He shook his knuckles, then dropped the guy he was holding. His best friend gave him a look, and Corey gave him a big approving smile.

“Who the fuck is this guy?” Ava spoke up. “Don’t know, but can we call the cops?” Corey asked. “Erm, after I just demolished him? And we’re having a party with loads of strangers?” Sam spoke sheepishly. “Ooo you’re right brother.” Corey hummed. Sam looked over at the corner, who Ava was hugging and covering.

“Hey, hey,” Sam thanked Ava, and hushed you quietly and cradled you in his arms. “You wanna go home?” He whispered, you nodded with hiccups. “Take me home,” your voice was horse and he winced. He nodded, “thanks for the party Ava.” He gave her a hug, you stayed put to his side. “Wanna come home with us Colby?” His best friend nodded, and the two waved goodbye to Ava and Corey once again.

You sat in Sam’s passenger seat, or as he likes to call it “passengers princess seat”. Colby sat in the middle of the car. The light from the mirror was on, tears were still rolling down your cheeks, Sam’s hand on your thigh as Colby’s was placed on your shoulder.

You were looking at yourself in the mirror, more specifically your neck. You choked back a sob when you see multiple bruises, instantly disgusted with it. “Shh, hey it’s okay it’s okay.” Sam rubbed his hand on your thigh, up and down, “you’ll be okay. You’ll have us, we will do whatever you tell us to do princess.” Colby’s voice can be heard from behind you and you sniffled. “I just wanna go home,” your voice scratched.

You could hear Colby look for something in the back as Sam spoke sweet nothings towards you, his hands squeezing your thigh every once in a while. Colby finally got what he wanted, and pushed it up to the front. You looked to your left, to see a water bottle. “Thank you,” you murmur. You took a sip and felt relieved. “Can we all have a sleep over?” You asked, looking at your boyfriend then towards Colby. Colby looked over at Sam for permission. “Of course, whatever you want Babes.”

The three of you finally got home, and you instantly walked towards Sam and your’s shared room, taking your clothes off and turning on the shower. Sam looked over at Colby, he shrugged. “Could you get the living room all ready for us? Im gonna go take care of her.” Colby nodded and walked off, Sam went up the stairs to you. “Baby?” He yelled, taking his clothes off and walking to the shower. He knocked on the wall, just to make sure it was okay to come in with you.” “Hey love,” he smiled at you. His eyes wandered your body as he stepped in, his arms wrapping around your naked waste.

The two of you stayed like that before doing your shower routine, then getting out and doing your nightly routine. You went to grab the concealer, Sam stopped you. “I know you don’t like what’s on your neck right now,” he whispered, his hands slightly touching your face then running down your neck gently. “But if you cover that up it won’t really get better, so let’s search something up to get rid of bruises better okay? I’ll search it up for you. You don’t gotta worry about a thing,” he kissed your cheek, then kissed your forehead.

“Go downstairs, I’m pretty sure Colby’s waiting for us. Let me get comfy,” he still had his towel just hanging on his waist. You nodded, hugging him tightly then walking down stairs. “Colby,” your voice croaked. He looked over to you and smiled. “Hows my favorite princess?” He asked with a brighter smile, scooting over to the end of the mattress he brought down from who knows where. “Better,” you climbed ontop, sitting next to him “where’s Sam?” He asked.

The two of you heard footsteps coming from above, “here!” He yelled, then threw two pillows down and both of them plopped right in front of you. “Oh, pillows are important.” You whispered, Colby chuckled at your comment. Sam cleaned his feet, then got ontop of the mattress the three of you would be sharing. You smiled, getting comfortable as you grabbed both of Sam and Colby’s arm to get close to create warmth. Colby’s arm wrapped lower onto your waist, his hand resting on your thigh as your boyfriend’s wrapped just tightly around your stomach. “My favorite boys,” you whispered.

[morgana-larkin]

Love your work, i think ive read all ur melissa x reader fics😭. So yk how melissa says “youse”? I was wondering if u could make a fic where reader is a new teacher and shes from the south and constantly says “ya’ll” instead. Idk what after that tbh

Girl next time I'll need a bit more than that. And really happy that you love my work and thank you for the prompt. Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!

On another note: I'm finally getting to all your prompts, so if you sent one, it's coming soon! I believe I have 5 other Melissa ones and 1 Chessy prompt.

Southern Girl

Warnings: Fluff, Reader having doubt

Words: 2k

You walk into the doors of Abbott all excited. You’ve been subbing for a year now, mostly at Addington Elementary, the charter school down the street. Now you’re Abbott Elementary’s new art teacher. You check in at the office and get your classroom key and badge with the photo from the interview a week ago. 

“Alright newbie, you’re here. Follow me to the teacher’s lounge and I’ll introduce you to the ones that I tolerate here.” Ava pipes up from behind you and you follow her there.

You both walk in and 8 sets of eyes fall on you two. 3 from a corner in the back, 3 from a table near the window and 2 from a table near the fridge. 

“Newbie this is where you introduce yourself.” Ava tells you as you were shocked with the sudden spotlight on you.

“Oh right, hi y’all my name is Y/n Y/l/n. I’m the new art teacher here.” You introduce yourself, your southern accent visible. Two teachers come bouncing over to you and talking a mile a minute. The things you got were Janine Teagues, second grade teacher as well as Jacob Hill, 8th grade teacher. The rest you didn’t catch at all as it was a lot before 8am.

“Janine dear, why don’t you and Jacob give her some room, she just got here.” One of the women from the table near the fridge says. “Hello dear, I’m Barbara Howard, kindergarten teacher.” She says gently as Janine and Jacob go to sit down. Barb then softly nudges the woman next to her and gets a weird look from the ginger. You have to admit that this nameless ginger is very attractive. “You should introduce yourself.” Barb tells her and she sighs.

“But she’s from the south, for all we know she can be a cowboys fan.” She says to Barb.

“The girl from south is right here and can hear you. And are you talking about the Dallas Cowboys?” You ask and she quirks an eyebrow at you.

“So youse a fan?” She asks and crosses her arms.

“Of the cowboys, no. Never really been a fan until I got here to be honest. It was all the rage when I got here so I looked into it, the Eagles aren’t bad of a team.” You tell her and you see the slightest smile on her face. 

“I’m Melissa Schemmenti, 2nd grade teacher.” She introduces herself and you freeze.

“Schemmenti? Why does that name sound familiar?” You say and she sighs.

“Have you been to Addington?” She asks and you nod.

“Quite a bit actually.” 

“You might have met my sister Kristen Marie there then.” She says and you widen your eyes.

“Of course, I do know her. Her and I are texting buddies, we text about once a week. I honestly forgot about her last name.” You tell her and she shakes her head. “Wait you’re Melissa, she’s mentioned you a few times.” You add.

“All bad things I’m assuming, knowing my sister.” She says and you shake your head.

“No, not bad at all.” Mostly embarrassing things, but you ain’t mentioning that to her. “Well I’d love to stay and chat with y’all but I gotta skedaddle. Lots to do in just a week.” You tell them and then leave the room. Everyone turns to look at Melissa and while she doesn’t see it, she feels them all staring at her.

“What are all youse looking at?” Melissa says without turning to look at them.

“You gave your name so… willingly.” Janine says confused.

“You heard her, she doesn’t mind the Eagles, she seems alright.” Melissa says with barely a thought to the answer.

At the end of the day you go to turn into the teachers lounge to get your lunchbox, only to run into Melissa, physically run right into her.

“Oh I’m so sorry Melissa, you ok?” You tell her while you have your hands on her arms to stabilise her. 

“Ya I’m fine kid, are you alright?” She asks you and you nod. You go to get your lunchbox from the fridge and when you go to leave, she’s still there, waiting for you.

“Should I be flattered that you’re waiting for me?” You joke with her and she chuckles.

“I think so. I mean, I’ve never done it for anyone else before.” She says and you smile.

“Well considered me flattered then.” You tell her and she smiles at you.

“Well let’s, what did you say earlier? Skedaddle?” She teases you and you laugh. You both start to walk to the parking lot.

“Why Melissa, I hope you’re not making fun of the language of the south.” You joke with her and she laughs.

“Wouldn’t dream of it southy.” 

“Oh I get a nickname too? You’re too sweet.” You say and she playfully shoves your shoulder with hers.

You reach the parking lot and then you both walk to her car which was right next to yours. 

“Well I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” You ask her, not wanting this moment to end. 

“Ya, you will kid.” She tells you with a smile then gets in her car.

2 months go by and it’s safe to say you’re settling in pretty well. You’ve gotten support from your coworkers and your students are loving your classes. There’s one specific coworker that stands out to you and that’s Melissa. You’ve found yourself admiring her a couple weeks now. Ever since you were able to watch her teach, you’ve been wanting to again. At lunch, she offered you a spot at her and Barb’s table, which apparently has never happened before, and you find yourself staring at her when she’s talking. When she comes to drop her kids off at your class, you make yourself more presentable before she gets there, you quickly brush your hair, reapply lip balm, just anything to make yourself look better for her. You got looks from people when she invited you over to her house for the first time and you loved every second of it. You’ve also gotten weird looks from Barb and the trio lately and you have no idea why, until Barb talks to you. 

“Hello dear, can I come in?” She asks from your doorway and you look up from your sketchbook.

“Barb, hi. Ya of course.” You tell her and she smiles as she walks in and closes the door. “What’s up?” You ask as you put your pencil down and lean back in your chair to look at her. 

“I’ll be blunt with you.” She starts and you tilt your head at her in question. “You have a crush on Melissa right?” She asks and you widen your eyes. “We all see it, you’re not good at hiding it.” She adds.

Well no use in trying to cover it up. “Oh god, does that mean that Melissa knows?” 

You ask her and she shakes her head.

“No, Melissa won’t ever think that you’ll like her. The only way she’ll know is if you tell her.” She says and you sigh.

“Well that won’t ever happen?” You say and she tilts her head at you.

“Sweetheart, what reason can you have to not want to tell her?”

“Many reasons. About to start with the fact that she’s straight, she’s my friend, she’ll never be into me, she’s out of my league, and did I mention that she’s straight?” You say and she smiles at you.

“You did mention it. Dear, I have known Melissa a long time, and what I can tell you is that you’ve caught her eye. I’ve seen how she is when someone catches her interest and how she is with friends. She treats you differently then how she treats me and the rest of the Abbott crew, and everyone else she has ever befriended. What I’m saying is, I think if you told her about your feelings for her, you might be surprised of her answer.” Barb says and you look at her stunned. 

“I’ll- I’ll think about it.” You tell her.

“I wouldn’t take too long, Gary has his sights on her too.” She tells you and you widen your eyes.

“The vending machine guy?” You ask and she nods.

“Well she might be better off with him.” You say casually.

“Why do you say that? Why wouldn’t she be happy with you?”

“Cause I’m me.” You tell her and then get back to your drawing. Barb walks up to you and puts her hand on your shoulder.

“Yes you’re you, and Melissa likes who you are.” Barb tells you and then leaves.

At the end of the day you finish cleaning up the art supplies, then you grab your stuff and leave and you bump into someone on the way out.

“Oh sorry hon.” Melissa tells you.

“Oh Melissa, hi.” You stutter. “Wha- what are you doing in this corner of the school?” You ask her, considering her classroom is on the other side of the school.

“I came here to see you.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t see you at lunch today, or barely at all today actually.” She says.

“Melissa, are you saying you missed me?” You tell her in a teasing tone.

“I did actually, if you must know.” She says and playfully shoves your shoulder. “Something happened at lunch actually.” She adds and you tilt your head to let her continue. “Gary asked me out.” She says and you stop breathing for a second and widen your eyes.

“Oh.” You say, you stayed in your classroom at lunch today going over what Barb told you before lunch. Now it seems you missed your chance.

“I turned him down.” She says and that snaps you out of your head.

“What? You said no?” You tell her and she nods her head. “Why?”

“Because I don’t want to go out with him. I’d rather go out with someone else.” She tells you and she takes a step towards you. You’re breathing quickens as you look into her emerald green eyes that captures you in them. Your faces are close together, as you’re the same height, it wouldn’t take much to lean forward and kiss her. You gulp as you realise she’s waiting for you to say something.

“And who is it that you’d rather go out with?” You ask and you glance down at her lips before looking into her eyes again.

“You.” Is all she says but it still leaves you breathless. You see her glance down at your lips briefly before looking into your e/c eyes. Without thinking, you lean forward and kiss her fiercely. She kisses you back with just as much force and she grabs the back of your head with both of her hands. You place your hands on her waist and press her up against the wall and you both continue kissing each other as if your lives depended on it.

 “Should we stop them? I mean it is still school property.” Janine says as the trio, Barb, Ava and Gary are watching you two make out down the hall.

“I think we should let them enjoy today. Then if we catch them making out again, then we can stop them.” Barb says, glad you both finally took the chance. “And Gary, thanks for asking her out, I knew it would make Melissa finally admit her feelings.” Barb tells him and he nods at her.

“Glad I could help.” He says and they all leave.

You both pull back to catch your breath. Melissa giggles as you look at each other. “Did you kiss all the southern girls that told you they have feelings for you?” She asks with a smile.

“I never liked them back so no.” You tell her and she cups your cheek. You surge forward to capture her lips on yours again, never wanting to pull back.

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[iridiss]

gimme an Aphmau that flirts. gimme an Aphmau that gets Zoey, Garroth, Aaron and even Laurance (when you catch him off guard) flustered. gimme an Aphmau whose the boss. gimme an Aphmau whose witnessed the horrors. give me an Aphmau that’s learned to mature and live in the horrors, who wipes the blood off her lips with her thumb. give me an Aphmau whose not afraid to stab you through the heart when you went a little too far. give me an Irene that invokes eldritch horror in me, give me an Irene whose a little too comfortable with killing for good and just reasons, and Aphmau has to stop herself from going too far. give me an Aphmau soaked in blood, being brought back to earth by Laurance holding her tight. give me an Aphmau who makes shitty puns and jokes and keels over laughing at them. give me an Aphmau who winks at you. give me an Aphmau whose not afraid to cause mischief and chaos (especially in mystreet). give me an Aphmau who gives her boys stone cold orders, and they follow through without hesitation like the good bloodhounds they are.

give me an Ava who loves to party late into the night. give me an Ava whose drunk off her ass and making horrible decisions. give me an Ava whose not afraid to be a bitch and tell it to your face. give me an Aphmau that radiates matriarch energy, who can be serious and stern enough to tell you to cut the shit and everyone listens to her. give me an Aphmau whose in charge. give me an Ava who leashes her boys and takes them out on walks. give me an Ava whose in control, whose in charge of everything going on in her life, and though she may be self-destructive and watching her life fall apart, she’s the one who chose to let it burn.

give me an Aphmau who went through hell and came out stronger because of it. give me an Ava that would take the throne in a heartbeat. give me an Aphmau and an Ava with a lotta love to give and they’ll happily let anyone into their lives, because everyone’s lapping at her feet and wants a taste. everyone wants a bite of her, so she ends up with a whole pack of dogs that’ll do anything she asks them to. give me an Aphmau that embraces that and feels confident in her own skin and loves each and every one of her partners and loves her life and don’t you dare fuck with her, or else the whole packs gonna go for your throat.

give me an Aphmau who radiates happiness and joy and love and kindness, who takes in everyone and anyone, who is the mother to all, who will forgive the unforgivable and turn the devil’s darkest soldier into someone totally and wholly devoted to her. give me an Aphmau surrounded by devotion, undying loyalty, trust, never-ending love. a family that she built from scratch with her bare hands. the gods won’t love you, but she will. she’ll become your new god. gimme an Aphmau that would make a high priest tremble. everyone loves her, do they not? don’t you want a taste too? she’s entrancing. you want to do what she says. she’ll give you a home, she’ll give you love, she’ll build heaven and allow you to live in it.

she’s Aphrodite. she is Hera. she is Persephone. she is Athena.

give me an Aphmau who is power incarnate.

[thecousinsdangereux]

i just recently discovered your soulmate au and i loves it so much. so incredibly intriguing and well written and damn is it hot 🔥 thanks so much for sharing with us. in your mind, does it have a happy ending for them?

also wanted to ask if you'll be checking in to see the big warrior nun announcement coming tomorrow?

Ahhhh thank you! This ask is kind of tragic now given how everything with Warrior Nun ended up going, but I thought I'd use it as a way to share my ideas for the rest of a beggar in the morning, if anyone is interested in learning how it was going to go. Long story short, it was going to have a happy ending. :)

Here's a full outline for what I had in mind for the second half of the fic. Under the cut because it's very detailed in the parts that I'd started writing. Also in case anyone cares about spoilers? At the moment, I don't plan on finishing this fic, but I do plan on returning to writing in general, so guess there's a non-zero chance that I could come back to it. Stranger things have happened.

Beatrice keeps looking for the recipient of the Letter she's been trying to deliver and starts taking trips out into the countryside. She takes Ava's advice and takes to enjoying the journey - stopping into small cafes for lunch rather than eating in the car, taking the long way when it means she can enjoy a new view, etc.

During one of these side quests, she's told about a man who lives way off in the middle of nowhere who has the last name of Reis (the last name of the Letter recipient: Lara Reis), and she tracks him down. He had a sister who had a child with someone who was not her Match. I wanted to go more into what this looks like (and how the church is still anti-abortion in this world, because they think this could potentially ruin a future match, cue eye-roll) but in this case, the woman was basically run out of town. The man directs Beatrice to an orphanage where the child was raised.

This trail eventually goes cold because the orphanage has no records of the girl. They only know she left when she became of age.

The end of chapter six is basically Beatrice being frustrated and taking some 'advice' from Lilith to find someone to fuck hfkjshlk so she goes to the bar and ohhh nooo Ava is working that night, filling in for someone. Ava gets jealous, Bea does some shots, and it's basically a rehash of the lemon drop scene from the show, but hornier. Eventually, they make out, and decide to be friends with benefits.

Chapter 7 was honestly just going to be porn. lol. It's actually some of the first stuff I wrote for this fic - just a page of porn. Beggar came out of a Secret Santa fic exchange, and my friend Alex asked for lots of sex and a soulmate au. So... Chapter 7 was the payoff (part 2). Here's a few disjointed scenes, in case anyone is interested in reading some unedited very E-rated stuff.

A few months go by and all the nuns visit Beatrice for her bday and they're like huh so what's going on here and Beatrice has to pretend that it's not that serious with Ava (lol). I also wanted to do a conversation between Shannon and Beatrice where Shannon talks about the whole Mary thing and loving someone against the will of god (or at the very least, in the very gray areas).

The end of chapter seven is Ava finally talking about her past, which is that Ava doesn't remember hers. She woke up in a hospital without her memories and then spent the next decade traveling around trying to find something that felt like home.

In chapter 8, a lot of time passes, and the fucking continues. Beatrice is kind of losing it, poor girl.

I hadn't exactly decided what was going to happen next, but Ava was going to overstep in some way (or in some perceived way) and Beatrice was going to panic. Either Beatrice was going to have a brief thought about being in love, they were going to have reallyyyy soft sex, or something like that, but either way, Beatrice was going to have to admit she has deeper feelings for Ava than what's allowed allowed, so she goes back to Spain and ignores Ava's texts/calls/etc.

Eventually she realizes she owes Ava closure. She comes back and kind of explains why she's reacted the way she has. She gets more into why she joined the church and it's not for God or the Church itself, but because she does genuinely believe that love itself is holy. She admits she's falling in love with Ava, but she can't break her vows. She believes giving into her feelings would be putting herself above the whole history of love... the sanctity of the entire universe... and to be that selfish would be monstrous.

There's a callback to their early game of three questions, and how Ava still owes Beatrice one answer. Beatrice nearly asks if Ava loves her, but pulls back because she's scared of the answer. They basically break up, but Ava tells Bea to let her know when she's ready to ask her last question.

Beatrice takes it HARD. She buries herself in her work and starts visiting hospitals in various towns. She finds a Spanish doctor and he recognizes the number (or rather, the system behind the number) that is on Letter Beatrice is still trying to deliver. He tells Beatrice she's not looking for a hospital in Portugal, but rather in Spain - one in a small town in Andalusia. He mentions a patient who was in a coma, who woke up without her memories.

At this point, Beatrice obviously knows and she flies to Spain in daze. She visits the hospital, gives them the number, and asks for the name of the patient. When they'd brought the girl in, no one knew where she came from, she didn't have an ID, memories, etc. Nothing except for an old receipt from a restaurant in Portugal. ("Beatrice braces herself for what she already knows, but doesn't want to face.") The nurse at the hospital tells her they used a generic Portuguese name for the girl and it stuck: Ava Silva.

Beatrice visits Cat's Cradle because what else is she supposed to do? How is she supposed to deliver this Letter to Ava, who she's obviously in love with. She talks with Mary and we get the other side of the whole Mary/Shannon thing, and Mary is kind of like, okay, the Letters matter but they don't Matter. Beatrice asks Mary what she would do if she got a Letter (since Mary isn't a nun and could get one, but Shannon never could) and Mary basically says she would throw it away without opening it because she wouldn't want to give Shannon a reason to go self-sacrificial.

Of course, Beatrice doesn't really think this is her call to make. She's going to deliver Ava's Letter. There's this whole scene of her very dramatically and angstily getting ready for the delivery in the Official White Habit, then walking through the town she's come to associate so completely with Ava. And chapter 9 ends.

When Beatrice walks through the doors of the bar, Ava looks up, but doesn't seem surprised, even says 'oh, finally', which is pretty much the last thing that Beatrice expected, but then again, maybe it should have been the first, because Ava is always surprising her, and shouldn't she expect it by now? She asks Ava if she'd known that she was the person Beatrice had been trying to deliver to all along and Ava looks confused at this, like she hadn't considered that at all. "It's not that. I just knew my Letter would be coming because I'd already met you."

Beatrice is like, no no no. That's not how this works. It can't be me. I've been carrying this Letter with me this whole time - before I met you - and the Letters are only sent to a person when they've met their soulmate. And obviously, Beatrice is a nun and can't have a soulmate, etc. etc.

And then Ava says something like this: “Maybe every once in a while, God -- or the universe or whatever it is -- knows that it’ll be really hard to make two people meet organically, so it fudges the rules a little bit. Makes one girl a nun, makes another one hard to find, and sets up the dominos really early on."

And when Beatrice says she's being ridiculous/it's impossible, she says, "I know what’s in that letter. It’s you. I don’t need to open it to know it's you." and "Maybe it’s like some people say and god arranged it all. Fine. Then god chose me for you. Simple. He made me in this exact way, down to my hands and toes and whatever, so that I was perfect for his favorite creation in all of the universe. Because that has to be you."

And: "Or maybe it’s like what those other people say. You know - the past lives reincarnation stuff. Fine, then in our first lives we fell in love and then I found you in the second and third and the five hundredth. I found you and I picked you and I wanted you every time. Or okay, fine, maybe it’s what the the pseudo science people say. Even if those guys are right, I still know. It’s you because at the very start of the universe - at the very beginning of everything - we were the first two bits of something. The first two tiny little sparks. One of those was you and one of them was me. And even when we split off into a million trillion billion infinite pieces, the core of one was you. And the other one was me."

And: "In every religion or in any theory, the world exists so that I can find you again, and the world will do whatever it takes - bend the rules in whatever way - to make sure that at the exact right time, we would meet. And maybe it wasn’t perfect - maybe it was stupid hard for us to get to this point - maybe there was an easier way to make it happen - but I don’t care. Because it worked and I found you and I fell in love with you and I would do anything for that. So yeah. This Letter is telling me that I’m for you. That’s easy. It’s not faith. It’s just a fact.

And: "Besides, whatever’s on that paper? It’s going to be you. If it’s a picture of a butterfly, then it’s going to be you because of that time we went to the dam and one landed on your hand and you said “isn’t the world beautiful?” and that’s when I knew I loved you for the very first time. If it’s the notes to the first bar in At Last, then it’s you, because we used to play it all the time in the bar and I always thought it was fucking stupid to think you'd know like that right away, before everything, but it was the song that played in my head anyways when you walked in the bar that first night. There she is, I sort of thought, a dream that I can speak to."

"It could be any single word or phrase or letter and it would be you, because I love you and I love you so much I see you in every part of this entire world. I love you and I want to keep you with me always, and so you’re always there in my thoughts, slipping over and into everything else and I love it. It makes me love everything I see a little bit more, because it reminds me of you. It makes the world more beautiful."

"So, no offense, but I don't really give a fuck about the Letter. I already know it's going to be you. But I think you need to see it. So you know you’re not as selfish as you think you are."

And Beatrice admits that she wants to be with Ava anyways. Even if it makes her selfish. (Even if it makes her heretical.) Love is holy and what she feels for Ava is holy too, even if it's a sort of holy no one else will ever understand.

I went back and forth about whether they actually SHOULD open the Letter. lol. But I think I eventually settled on that they should, and that when Ava does open it, it's a blank page with like, 7 little dots and Beatrice is like??????????????? But Ava recognizes it instantly and it's the freckles on Beatrice's cheeks, the ones she's always tracing, and she does that again, following the ink on the paper.

Beatrice had been ready to give up her religion for Ava, so getting to keep it, maybe, suddenly is a LOT. She can't quite believe something divine would do something like this for her. But maybe she can believe that something divine would do something like this for Ava.

Later, I wanted Beatrice to have a conversation with Mother Superion. I thought it would be interesting to get into the philosophical bits of it. To debate if Ava could actually be right in her ideas about how this could be, and still fit into what they know about god/Letters/religion. I liked the idea of the conversation ending with neither of them really knowing, and Mother S being like, look girl, you'll never know for sure, but that sounds like faith to me. And Beatrice says no, no this is different, capital F Faith is for the divine. This is just trusting that Ava isn't lying about the freckles thing, or won't get tired of me, or won't find someone else. Etc etc etc. because it's panicking time for Beatrice, suddenly. And Mother Superion just raps her knuckles sort of in the most gentle way she can manage and says "That's love, Beatrice." in the way way someone might say "That's pussy, babe."

Beatrice does leave the church (though she eventually goes back to 'consulting' kind of like Mary). And when she does actually physically leave as well, Ava is waiting outside on a bench. Beatrice asks why she didn't just come inside, and she says something about being a little afraid of churches these days. She did steal god's favorite, after all.

And then they walk off into the sunset, with Beatrice being like wait a second, I thought you said this was all God's plan. And Ava shrugs and says that she would never willingly give Beatrice up, so god might come to her senses and change her mind.

I was going to end it there, but I did consider doing an epilogue as well. Early on in planning I had this idea where, years later, all the nuns regularly come over to the Silvas (because Ava does keep her 'second' name, though she does start to learn more about the Reis family, and meets her Uncle - the dude Beatrice learned about the orphanage from). And on one of these occasions, the nuns are all in white, and they're delivering Beatrice's Letter, which is addressed to Beatrice Silva. In the end, I decided against this, because I liked leaving it more open-ended, but nothing had been set in stone at this point, of course.

So yeah, that was going to be a beggar in the morning. lol. I plotted most of it out before I even started writing, because it wasn't the sort of story you could make up as you went and still tell it well. And I did want to tell the story well! There's a part of me that's sad that I wasn't able to, but I do think it was worth writing what I did. I really loved seeing people realize that Lara was Ava, even as early as chapter 5! And I also loved people coming up with theories about how Avatrice would be endgame. Some of them were honestly really good and maybe better than mine fhdskjhfd I had one person be like PLEASE let Ava's Letter be for someone else so they can metaphorically spit in god's face and honestly that was valid.

I don't know if anyone is going to bother to read this very, very long reply to an ask that doesn't actually ask for any of this, but it honestly just feels nice to put all these ideas together and 'complete' the story. Even if I've done it in the most half-assed way possible I am so sorry fhadskjlfhldsj

[janeyseymour]

Dancing On My Own (Tiesto Remix)

Summary: You're a Cowboys fan in Eagles territory. Melissa finds out.

WC: ~2.05k

You have a secret- a deep, dark secret that you never ever want your fiery, die hard Eagles fan girlfriend to find out. You’re terrified of what will happen if she does. You’re a Dallas Cowboys fan. Okay, so maybe you were a second-hand Cowboys fan, but your dad bought you one of the jerseys because he absolutely adores them. And when you go home to Texas (how you ended up in the one state, one city that hates Dallas more than anything, you’ll never know), your dad always drags you to a game.

Upon moving to Philly, you took down every indication that you would ever associate yourself with the team that the Eagles love to hate. You couldn’t risk becoming an outcast before you even start your new life here.

And it did you good. You somehow land in the heart of the city, and you work for a school that absolutely bleeds Philadelphia. The principal adores the Eagles, Mr. Johnson is constantly yelling ‘Go Birds!’, Janine has a few trinkets in her room for each of the Philly Sports teams… even Gregory has come around to love Gritty. And then there’s Melissa Schemmenti. She’s had to go to court for throwing a corn cob at Ben Simmons when he pissed her off, she has ins with those who worked the demolition at the Linc,  she’s a season ticket holder for the Phillies and the Eagles… and she absolutely detests the Cowboys- more than most Eagles fans too. She’s gotten into more trouble for heckling the Dallas team than she’s willing to admit- knocking over portapotties when Cowboys fans are in them, throwing Philly cheesesteaks, hurling eggs and Molotov cocktails at the bus. 

And yet, she’s your girlfriend. How? You’re nearly perfect. You’re smart, you’re funny, you can sing and play instruments to make her swoon, you’re a wonderful teacher and great with the kids, and you’re more than easy on the eyes. And that was what she knew of you before she fell madly in love with you. 

With the season coming up, your girlfriend is more than excited. She’s been waiting for the season tickets to go on sale, but even then… if she doesn’t get them the legal way, she knows a guy.

She does end up getting them. Of course she does. And as soon as she does, she’s coming into the teachers lounge doing her happy dance and making her way over to you. She kisses you soundly before proclaiming that she is 100% taking you to an Eagles game.

“And,” she notes. “I’m gonna make sure it’s a good one… Eagles versus the fuckin’ Cowgirls! Go birds!”

She’s met with a chorus of ‘Go birds!’ right back, but you stay quiet.

She turns to you with a curious look, amused grin now gone. “Babe, aren’t you excited?!”

You shrug. “I just… haven’t ever really been into football?” you offer weakly.

“Well, I’m gonna make sure that you have a great time there. I’m gonna get you an Eagles jersey, a Jalen Hurts one, and you’re gonna have the damn time of your life!”

Again, you shrug your shoulders, looking unsure.

“Aye, if she ain’t gonna use the ticket for good, I’m right here!” Mr. Johnson points to himself. “You know we’ll have a good time.”

“Nah, Mr. J,” your girlfriend rolls her eyes. “I’m taking Y/N, and she’s gonna leave the Linc a die hard Eagles fan, right?” She looks at you in a way that tells you there’s no convincing her otherwise unless you want to out yourself right now as a fan of the Cowboys.

You just nod, knowing you can’t have this conversation in public- you do not want to be shunned by the rest of your coworkers. You could potentially lose this job; Ava has fired people for less despite the fact that she really couldn’t afford to fire them and that’s why both you and Melissa are teaching two different grades at a time.

That’s the end of that conversation.

Until she comes over to your apartment that night, ready to cook dinner for you and stay over. 

“You gonna tell me why you got so weird about going to a football game with me? Is it because we might see our students at the game?” she asks. “Because if it is, I promise you… you know Philly is pretty cool about LGBT stuff.”

“I know, I know,” you say softly. “I’ve just… could we go to a baseball game instead?” You never pledged your allegiance to any baseball team, so you would be willing to wear a Harper or Nola jersey.

“I mean, I could get us tickets to a game,” she tells you as she puts the meat into the pan to start cooking. “But I really love football and the Eagles, and that’s something I want to share with you.”

“Does it have to be a game with the Cowboys?” you ask.

She turns to you at that. “Those are the best games.”

“I-” you sigh. Deciding to just rip off the bandaid, you take off the Abbott sweatshirt that you’re wearing to reveal the Day Prescott jersey your dad had given you the last time you visited your hometown. 

Her jaw drops, and her eyes fill with a fire. “When the fuck were you gonna tell me that you were the enemy?” she seethes.

“Mel,” you say softly, trying to calm her down.

“Don’t ‘Mel’ me right now,” the redhead hisses. “What the fuck?! What the actual fuck?!”

“Melissa, honey,” you continue. “Please-”

“I- no,” she stops you from getting any closer to her when you attempt. “Don’t. Don’t you even fucking dare.”

She’s out of your house before you can say anything else, and the only thing that you can hear is the flank steak sizzling quietly in the pan on the stove.

When you get to school the next day, you head straight for her room to try to talk to her again.

“Melissa,” you knock on the door, a cup of her favorite coffee in your hands as a peace offering.

“No.”

You set the warm drink on her desk, which she promptly smacks into the garbage can under her desk. She stands hastily and storms out of the room in the direction of the staff room.

“Melissa, please!” you beg as you chase after her. “Please!”

“I have nothing to say to you,” she hisses as she rips her arm away from you when you catch her gently. She storms into the break room and heads right for the coffee mugs.

“Please!” your voice cracks, and everyone that is already gathered there turns at the commotion.

“Ooh,” Ava says. “Trouble in paradise. Spill.”

“This one-” your girlfriend, if she even still is after your reveal last night, points to you and looks at you with disgust. “-is a Cowgirls fan, and decided not to let me know until last night!”

“Boo!” Mr. Johnson heckles you. You give him a nearly murderous look.

“Just let me explain!” you plead.

“You have nothin’ to explain! You’re a traitor!” the redhead barks at you before turning back to the mugs. She slams the door as she closes it, slams her coffee mug down on the counter, and storms her way to her seat next to Barbara. She makes it so that there is absolutely no way you could sit next to her.

All eyes are on you, and you hate it. So you do what you know how to do: run.

You avoid the second grade teacher at all possible costs for the next few days, giving her the chance to cool down. Finally, at the end of the week, you attempt to talk to her.

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” she huffs. She doesn’t even bother looking up from her nails. She doesn’t even give you the chance to explain yourself. “I ain’t dating no Cowgirl.”

You cry the entire way home. You lost your girlfriend, and all because of some stupid football team.

You call your father that night, a sobbing mess.

“You were dating an Eagles fan?!”

“Dad,” you cry. “Please. I don’t- I just need you to tell me that it’s all going to be okay.”

“It is,” he promises you. “But, seriously?”

You hang up on him.

He calls back a few minutes later, apologizing for his words. You forgive him of course. You love your father more than anything. 

“If you really love her, you’ll get her back… even if it means you betray our team,” he tells you.

“R-really?” you whisper.

“You’re in Philly now,” your dad sighs softly. “If you can’t beat ‘em, and the lord knows you can’t because no one can beat Philly fans, join ‘em.”

That’s all you need to hear to know what you’re going to do. “Thank you, Dad.”

“Of course, kiddo. Just know that when you come home to visit, you are back on my team.”

“I know,” you chuckle through your tears. “But if I bring Mel back home, there is to be absolutely no football talk.”

“Deal,” he laughs. “I’m not trying to get our house lit on fire.”

You thank him again, tell him you love him and hang up. 

That weekend, you go out and buy a bunch of Philadelphia sports apparel; your credit card statement this month is going to be a doozy. But if it means you’ll get Melissa back, it’ll be worth it.

On Monday, you show up in your baseball gear, rooting for the Phillies as they play against the Cincinnati Twins. It gets the redhead’s attention, just slightly. But she turns her head when you look in her direction.

You wear your Flyers gear the next day. That gets Gregory’s attention.

The Sixers are the next. Janine grins.

You had even bought a Philadelphia Union jersey that you wear on Thursday. Jacob tells you how massively underrated they are and that he thinks they deserve to have a bigger following.

When you come in on Friday, not clad in Eagles gear like Melissa thought you would be, that is the final straw for her. She has you backed into a corner telling you that you can pretend to bleed Philly all you want, but at the end of the day you’re just a traitor.

You let her get up in your face, red with anger. You know that you didn’t wear it because you’re saving it for Monday- when they play.

You actually managed to get a ticket to the game, one next to hers- not that she knows it. You thank Barbara profusely when she’s able to get you the name of Melissa’s guy and where her tickets for this game are. Your plan is to show up in your new Jalen Hurts jersey that you spent a fortune on and win her back. You don’t want to lose her. Never. 

You race home after school to change out of your green shirt that you wore to school and into your Hurts jersey and a pair of leggings. You grab the baseball cap that you bought and pop it on your head before heading out to your car.

You park your car for the ridiculous amount of money they’re charging before going to find your seat. 

As you approach though, you see someone new with Melissa- someone you’ve never seen before. She has an arm around the woman’s waist like the way she used to hold you. You convince yourself it’s just a friend and continue on your way to your seat. But then she plants a kiss to the new woman’s lips, and your world shatters.

You might be at a football game, but you should be at a Phillies game with their unofficial anthem playing.

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, oh no

And I'm right over here, why can't you see me? Oh no

And I'm giving it my all

But I'm not the guy you're taking home, ooh

I keep dancing on my own

So far away, but still so near

The lights come on, the music dies

But you don't see me standing here