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somewhereincairparavel · 4 months ago

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"jason is a knockoff watered down percy" NO hear me out, jason actually parallels annabeth immensely, sharing SO many similarities with her personality, not percy, in this essay I will-

edit: my full analysis is out now! here

#just adding that I think jason and annabeth are similar BUT they are SEPARATE characters with separate personalities ❗❗#and i don't think jason is anyone's knockoff!! so don't misunderstand me guys!#trust me ik how it feels like to have jason getting mischaracterized so I would never do that!#when I read about jason the first time I'm like wow he's gentler but similar to annabeth chase wow he could be her twin #they are both genuinely interested in learning stuff. they both mansplain and geek. they are both misunderstood as conceding when they do #they love getting involved in debates and discussions. they both have designed temples assigned to them by the gods themselves #they are both seen as 'scary and intimidating' when they're just softies who need love. they are both overthinkers with too many plans #they are both soft for ppl w silly humor. they both kinda give off an untrustworthy vibe at first bc they know too much info #they are both also pretty suspicious and don't trust immediately. they both love architecture. they both have a 'cold icy' stare #also they're both TALL #I could keep going on and on for ages actually #pjo #pjo fandom #percy jackson #jason grace #pjo series #pjo hoo toa #pjo hoo #annabeth chase

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giantkillerjack · 2 years ago

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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slavhew · 10 months ago

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charmed, i'm sure

#homestuck #hom3stuck #jake english #dirk strider #dirkjake #jakedirk #admin draws #fanart #thats what you get for shrimping bro. i told you about the shrimping #to anyone whos been around for a while you can tell im quite obviously obsessed with that pose. that specific way of hugging urself #dirk was never escaping that #i need to draw some janeroxy too it bangs sm and i need to balance out this sausage party ive had going on in my head for the last xyz #how long has it been. how many weeks since ive seen natural light.#whatever.#id keep this to post in a batch with other drawings but it did well on its own on twt so i might as well post it here as is #feel like batchposting several basically finished drawings doesnt do me much good anyways. better serves smaller sketches on the same theme #ramble ramble

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black-and-yellow · 11 months ago

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#Saw a man bite straight through a chicken bone on YouTube.#I was gripped. In awe.#A jaw strength rivaled only by - I thought to myself - Present Mic #can't even remember how I got onto the video but it's stuck with me ever since #he had a captivating positive vibe. I would enjoy a meal with him. The chicken looked a little underdone though #bnha #mha #shouta aizawa #hizashi yamada #present mic #bnha comic #not even technically a comic this bad boy is two slides #always thinking about the rooftop gang naming Sushi like 'whats everyones favourite food?'#and Yamada says 'fried chicken' like that would be the best name for a cat- actually. you know what. that is a pretty good name for a cat #Might call my next tarantula Fried Chicken. Who knows?#Edited the last panel to take out the speech bubble cause it looked like I was implying it was weird to eat bone marrow #But I meant the entire bone itself like the crunchy bit #But apparently they do that in some places so I thought that it might come across as a bit insensitive and I didnt wanna get cancelled.#eat bones if you want I would love to eat bones but I'm a coward #It's not really a thing in the UK I don't think. I've never seen anyone do it. I guess we just produce a lot of food waste.#so nobody was going to tell me you could eat bones? I just had to find out myself on Youtube?

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captaincrowe · 2 months ago

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Anyway, after watching the Wicked movie again, I think my ideal outcome of the love triangle in a canon divergence scenario is "Gelphie and their free-range boytoy Fiyero who comes and goes as he pleases."

#before anyone asks #yes i have seen the musical #i have also read the book #i just love the comedic potential of this concept #and it's kind of how they read to me in the movie anyway #gelphie #gliyeraba #they won't seem him for months at a time sometimes #then they just wake up in the morning to find he managed to worm his way between them in bed #idk if his relationship with both or either of them is romantic or queerplatonic in this scenario #doesn’t matter #he's there when he wants to be #and who knows what he’s doing the rest of the time #(slutting it up and going on adventures i hope)#(good for him)#...i actually have a lot of thoughts about what their dynamics would look like in a very specific time of canon divergence au #but we don't need to go into that #wicked 2024 #wicked

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illmoraineakoi · 2 months ago

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Also for your consideration:

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pleaseinsertwittyurl · 1 month ago

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There are always 2 sides.

The discourse around Louis and Lestat being a victim and abuser and nothing more drives me insane.

Something i don't think enough people remember is that the very same reason the fight began in 1×05 (lestat grabbing claudia by the throat when she tries to "take louis away") we see Louis himself do to her in 1×07 when she tries to get Louis to burn Lestat.

They BOTH would harm her rather than live in a world without the other. They are both guilty of abusing her and each other.

There is an implication that a good deal of time passed between Louis and Lestat meeting and the church. Louis expresses that he shares himself with Lestat in a way he only had with Paul. I would assume that goes both ways, to a degree. We know Louis knows at least enough about Nicki to discourage Claudia poking that wound. He also clearly knows that the threat of leaving is his most powerful weapon against Lestat.

Mental abuse is abuse. And Louis abused Lestat mentally for years. Shaming him, ridiculing him, shutting him out, manipulating him into making Claudia (a traumatic moment for him, whether Louis understands the depths of it or not) by promising to give him what he's being denying him, promising to never put him through what he fears the most.

Louis admits to purposely making Lestat suffer. He admits he was warned that Claudia would suffer and he wanted her anyway because he needed to feel redeemed. He is not innocent. He is not a trapped, weak victim. He made choices to hurt both Lestat and Claudia time and time again.

Does this justify Lestat's actions in 1×05? Obviously not. But we now know Louis was not willing to stop the fight. He taunted Lestat the same way he taunted the Alderman. He was unleashing years of frustrations just as Lestat was. His priority was not to protect Claudia, it was to hurt Lestat, consequences be damned.

I hate the drop scene as much as the next person and Lestat has admitted he will never earn forgiveness for what he did. But if you view Louis as some squeaky clean victim who was manipulated, trapped, and abused by Lestat you are missing so much of what this show is conveying.

We will always tend to paint ourselves as the hero of our own story. It is hard to accept your faults or that you hurt people you love. It is much easier to shift that blame on to someone else, to frame them as the villian. But life is not usually that black and white. Claudia had harsh words for them both in her diary, even before they got to Europe, for a reason. They both made hurtful mistakes with her, both treated her like a pawn in their relationship instead of a person, both harmed her, took away her choice, never prioritized her.

That is the great tragedy. That she never had a choice and was not allowed to be her own person. And in the end, they both are responsible for her misery and her death. That's what makes the reunion scene so important. They have been grieving her and carrying that guilt alone, all the while longing for the comfort of the other for 70+ years. Louis has found clarity in his memories, he has accepted his role in their suffering, he has seen Lestat's perspective more fully. Lestat is broken, totally consumed with that guilt and grief. Both know that although they cannot change what they've done, they can forgive the other, even if they can't forgive themselves. They can love each other despite everything they've done to one another because they cannot stop loving each other. But now they can try to rebuild that love from the rubble.

#If you don't think that lestat would have killed anyone who grabbed Claudia the way Louis did (other than louis) you don't know lestat #tw abuse #iwtv #lestat de lioncourt #loustat #amc iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #claudia iwtv #iwtv text post #iwtv thoughts #I'm sorry idc if people have problems with this take I have problems with MISSING THE POINT #If they wanted you to view Lestat as an irredeemable monster the show would suck #Yes I think 1×05 was a mistake and I get why people struggle with it but we have learned a lot since #We know Louis is an unreliable narrator and we have only seen the real lestat in 1 scene #We have never truly heard his side of any of this ffs #If Louis loves him I can love him ok?#They are messy but they like that!!! Look at how they fell in love!!#Mess all around #Don't even get me started on viewing Armand as The Villian #claudia deserved better #They all do tbh #Rant over sorry #interview with the vampire #i could talk about this forever #Maybe season 3 will finally have some healthy relationship but probably not lol

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sciderman · 3 months ago

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Curious, how much Spidey merchandise do you own?

i'm really normal about spider-man and have a completely normal amount of spider-man merchandise.

#i do not presently have 12 peter parker funko pops not including peter parker affiliated characters that i also do not own.#sci speaks #i swear.#i also definitely do not have two giant spider-man plushes. one that i sleep with at night and one that hangs from the corner of my ceiling #protecting me while i sleep. i definitely do not have that. it would be weird. and i am normal. i am normal about spider-man.#i do not have those items nor any other strange spider-man items that may strike anyone as unusual. for i am normal.#anyone who has seen my room can tell you how normal i am.

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dewwshi · 9 days ago

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i liked the sparring scene from the start of siege of darkness a normal amount

#ugh i've been working on this for like several days #it's been so long since i fully shaded and rendered something so the perfectionist in me is tempted to just keep adjusting shading opacitie #but no i'm posting it now and then i'm never going to look at it again #lest i notice a mistake #artist things. you understand #these two... they are sooo good to me i love them they're adorable #i love them and their stupid personality flaws and their stupid will they won't they romance and their stupid mutual pining <3 #ordinarily a male mc ogling at their love interest might come off as creepy but 1. drizzt has emotional issues so it's ok and 2. he's a gir #i almost put a lesbian flag behind him in the doodle of him staring at catti but i reeled it in #but for real transfem drizzt anyone? i've been thinking of this nonstop am i the only person to ever have thought of that?#i actually legit am shocked i've not seen anyone else in the fandom make that observation yet cuz he's SO transfem coded to me #it makes sooo much sense and catti-brie's relationship with wulfgar is like TEXTBOOK comphet too BUT WHATEVER WHATEVER it's fine it's fine #don't even worry about it #one day i'll rant about it #The Cattidrizzt Yuri Rant #it's on the horizon #but the point is they're cute & i like them #starless night and siege of darkness are def my favourite books so far #ESPECIALLY STARLESS NIGHT LITERALLY SUUUCH A GOOD BOOK #you know how long it's been since i got so obsessed with something that i drew this much fanart of it??? YEARS #it began SO SUDDENLY but these books have me in a CHOKEHOLD #legend of drizzt #drizzt do'urden #catti-brie battlehammer #catti-brie #putting 2 tags for her cuz realistically who is searching her name with the clan name on this site.#lod #forgotten realms #dnd #i feel like because of lighting my drizzt design's skintone looks comically different in every drawing i do of him

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taffywabbit · 29 days ago

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quick OOTD doodle (from a trend ppl were doing on bsky)

#taffy art #self portrait #ootd #sorry to once again shatter the illusion for anyone who hasn't seen me draw myself before and assumed i was a small rabbit #i actually can't remember if i've posted any drawings of me on this account before tbh. i don't do them that often

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teethbomb · 6 months ago

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“It’s not that difficult to get your head around, you’ll never meet another me.”

#My art #gravity falls #bill cipher #stanford pines #billford #human bill design #human bill cipher #procreate #This took like.more than six hours #Anyway!! Reference to auto heart but the song that was in my head was friend like me from Aladdin <- has not watched that movie since ??#More of my bill. Who’s design I’m still tweaking #Stalkers tango <3 #I wanted to make bill more groovy. Still contemplating giving him triangular third eye glasses which I though would be too common of a desi #Choice but I haven’t seen anyone do that yet so maybe the next time I’ll get more weird with it #I forgot some tags #Ford pines #grunkle ford

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scoriarose · 5 months ago

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The Language of Love

If you are already convinced snakes are incapable of love, this post is not for you. But if you are open to the possibility that maybe they do, and maybe they love us too, this post explores that thought. Perhaps snakes feel it differently, perhaps they feel it the same humans do- though even humans experience love, be it platonic or romantic, differently from individual to individual. Different people also show their love in different ways as well! Yet still even with a divide between species most of us have felt love from our furry and feathered friends. Perhaps our scaly friends are also telling us they love us, we just might not understand.

When I first got my girl Scoria, if I could tell her only one thing it would be, "I love you." When I held her, I wondered if she understood how much I cared about her, and would do anything to protect her. When I pet her, I wondered if she knew how amazing I thought she was and enjoyed spending time with her.

And then I started watching livestreams of wild snakes, and how they act toward each other. (The above still is from Project Rattle Cam!) When the babies see a trusted adult, they slither all over them! How many times had my girl happily slithered all over me going no where in particular? I imagine that my finger petting her soft as a feather was probably quite similar to another snake greeting her in such a way.

Sakura is much more shy, yet wants to form a bond with me. I see it when she fights her fear to vibe with me. Sometimes she'll sit for hours at the edge of her tank nearest me, not wanting to come out, but just be near me.

Snakes like rattlesnakes and garter snakes will vibe peacefully with each other, with baby rattlesnakes sleeping near the adult rattlesnakes they trust to keep them safe.

Perhaps, when our shy snakes sits with us, facing their fears they're saying, "I'm scared, but I want to be closer with you." And maybe when our snakes slither all over us, going nowhere in particular, like their wild counterparts do with each other they're saying, "I'm so happy to see you! You're my favorite to be with!" I wonder if they could tell us one thing it would be "I love you, best friend!" And it's okay, best friend. I love you too, and already know. <3

#snakes #snake #hognose #rattlesnakes #rattle snakes #I don't want to debate this- those who would are already cemented in their opinions #Plenty of us snake caretakers have wondered I'm sure #From the behavior I've seen from my girls #I feel we are a happy little family #And they display requesting and giving affection #as well as empathy #Not sure what else they'd need to do to convince the world but its enough for me #And really why deprive snake caretakers the comfort of knowing their little scaley friends love them back #“But maybe they don't”#Yeah well maybe they do #Especially when they're doing the behavior their wild counterparts do when they see their friends #Yes they have friends!#Sakura understands when I do the hognose twitch too and will come over when I do it with my arm #Being able to communicate with them is incredible honestly #Anyway #If there was anyone out there wondering if their snake loves them #If they rush over to see you #like to vibe with you #then they enjoy your company #If they can't wait for you to pick them up and wiggle all over you going nowhere in particular #You know they are happy to be around you and are telling you in snake language #which seems super similar to petting/being pet for a critter with no arms #I mean when you have a tongue that isn't made for grooming #And I think it is family love <3

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canon-gabriel-quotes · 11 months ago

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chat is this real

x

#i need you all to know there was like 20 seconds of silence after this #heelo. can anyone. hear me. HHELLO #i am searching for a completely different clip from a stream i already watched #where he did the 'original' gabe voice that was nothing like what we ended up with #i thought i wrote it down. I DIDNT.......#so now im going through the auto generated subtitles for all the streams ive already seen till i hopefully find it #so i can edit it down and put it on here for anyone who is curious #this is going to be a very slow process that ill be doing only when im at work #so be patient #non voice post #video

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deanofsam · 6 months ago

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it just occurred to me that some of you might have missed seeing american football player joe burrow’s suit this past june during paris fashion week, and it is my personal opinion that everyone see these images at least once in their lifetime, especially those of us with a shared interest in slutty clothes on men (fictional or otherwise). so here they are.