#and actively try to ruin our LIVES let alone reputation ????

[poolboyservice]

I've gotten paranoid recently, I just need to ask

ygs will let us know when we get posted on systemcringe, and not leave us blind to the onslaught of hate towards us, right ?? you will let us know, right????

We haven't been posted on system cringe or similar as far as we know, but we're still terrified, yk ??

[rosedere]

The Liyue Lotus and the Merchant from Snezhnaya (Pantalone x Fem Reader)

Part 1, Chapter 2: The Lotus that became a White Rose (you are here), Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7~

Summary: A surprise visit to your new residence causes an interference in your plan of being low key.

-

If you think I'm lost, maybe

You're looking in the wrong places lately

You never ask if I'm okay

I've never felt better anyway

Thankfully, the gradual transformation of becoming “Lián” was complete.

No one had suspected a thing, assuming you were a small apothecary shop in the harbor that worked and lived alone. 

It was only after week 10 of being undercover that the two Fatui soldiers appeared at your door. 

Unsuspecting you began to play the part as "Lián,” you answered your door.

Your eyes almost bugged out of your head when you realized who it was:

One seemed to be a tall Fatui mage with a purple hood over her, making it difficult to figure out her true face; the other Fatui skirmisher was also wearing a dark hood over his figure just as his fellow solider had.

You were anticipating the worst.

 And the worst indeed was what you got.

“Lián?” 

“Yes?”

"Do you remember us?" The fatui mage asked, the voice that came from her was delicate and cheerful but not familiar to you.

"Galina,” the mage said, holding a hand out to you.

shakily, you let your hand connect with her outstretched one as you shook it cautiously.

After the awkward handshake, you pulled back to see the skirmisher bow before you.

“I am Fedor, Miss Lián,” he said before holding his bow for a few seconds.

“Please do not hesitate to ask for our assistance since...”

“We are your assigned guards,” they both said in an uplifting tone.

 Oh archons…. As if the pressure wasn't crushing.

“Ah, no need to fear! We are more than qualified to keep you safe as per the regerators order,” the mage spoke.

 "Oh, so I'm assuming Pantalone has sent you here?” You folded your arms.

“Yes, I did send them, darling.” A booming voice was heard behind your two guests.

His long, flowing coat pooling behind him as he walked up the cobblestone steps leading past the scent of spring shops below your small home. 

Of course, he did not come completely alone, with the few low-ranking Fatui soldiers surrounding him like knights.

It made sense, though, from the intel you gathered since he was utterly defenseless in the Fatui ranks. But what he lacked in brawn, he made up for with his scheming brain.

You gritted your teeth.

“Pantalone… you shouldn't have,” you said, letting your powder blue shawl cover more of your chest.

 He stood behind the two guards on your doorstep with his usual graceful smile twinkling before you.

 “Well, I wouldn't have to if you decided to take me up on that offer from our last date, darling.” 

 You remembered what he was saying. But you thought your dismissal of his pitiful offer was enough.

 “I know—I just want to go a bit slower in our relationship,” you puffed your chest out with a hefty sigh.

“I just dont want to ruin your reputation as a bachelor” you added flipping your hair.

He only raises one eyebrow at your statement.

"Such and active imagination you have there,” he laughed.

"I have already stressed I am a monogamous soul, I'd never play with your heart like that"

He then gestured back to the two guards before you still standing at attention.

“Please don't hesitate to get to know your two guards; I unfortunately have to go tend to some business, so I'll leave you for now, Liàn." Pantalone immediately walked towards you, parting the soldiers to the right and left for him in sync.

Stopping right in front of your doorstep towering over you.

“May I have a farewell kiss from my resilient lotus?” 

You could feel your scowl trying to form on the corner of your mouth, but you had quickly fought the urge.

He knew he had the upper hand with all these guards around. He only wanted to show he was in power. It made you sick.

Pantalone closed his eyes, leaning down to where your lips were expecting you to give the kiss on his plush lips before you.

Another sigh escaped before you quickly pecked his left cheek.

Pantalone, still waiting, opened his eyes to give you a clearly annoyed smile.

“Darling”

“I gave you what you wanted–”

He roughly grabbed your chin, pulling you to look up at him. Eyes widen in surprise.

“If I were you, I wouldn't act like a fool in front of my underlings now,” he scoffed his face distorted in annoyance.

“I'll give you one more chance to make it up to me.” 

As he said this, his grip on your chin was harshly increased, making you wince. 

You so badly wanted to breathe frost into his mouth if you weren't undercover right now.

Letting a small, pained whine out, you found his lips in front of you before you leaned in.

 It was already embarrassing that he was about to take your first kiss, but now he was doing it in front of his lower rankings.

You hesitantly brushed your lips against his before you latched onto his firmer lips. This action immediately makes Pantalone eagerly connect to your barely parted lips. He was quickly moving his lips over yours, trying to get you to open your lips more for him, but you tried to just stay as still as possible for him.

Your mind was starting to get hazy from the lack of air, you welcomed the cut off from his mouth, he then held you close to his chest.

 "See, that wasn't so hard, was it?” 

 You nodded in response, as you were forced to be against his chest.

 Pantalone gave you another kiss to the top of your neatly parted hair before he pulled away.

“Oh, before I go, I do have something to give you for our next date tonight,” he mirthfully said with the snap of his fingers.

The two guards that were escorting him before came before him holding four bags from a place you'd never heard of before.

Immediately, they held it out before you could grab it.

“Be sure to wear it. I want to see you in something other than that,” he pointed, gesturing to the frayed white silk dress you wore wrapped in your well knitted powder blue shawl.

“I will, I'm so flattered you even thought of me,” you gingerly grabbed the shopping bags from the two guards in front of you, who quickly went to form a circle around Pantalone.

“You're too kind, my little lotus,” he smiled.

With a small wave, he turned and walked down the alley, with his subordinates following closely behind.

Leaving you alone with your new accessories waiting patiently before you on your doorstep.

“So… Do you two just stay here?” You questioned the hooded figures before you.

“We are here and there; wherever you want us to be or do for us is what we must do." Galina assured with her hand over her chest.

"So what is our first task, my lady?” Fedor bowed.

"Well, if it's acceptable, would you mind watching the entrance? You're welcome to come in, but I'm going to dress in the clothing I received and–”

“Of course, my lady,” they both responded in unison before the mage practically disappeared before your eyes in a bright spark of purple while the skirmisher began the walk down the steps towards the stone steps of your accommodations.

Thank God they left.

You knew he left them here to spy on you.

Shutting your door, you used your elemental sight to see if it was truly safe from the guards that were waiting outside your "home"

Quickly going to your bedroom, you went to the small nightstand in the bottom drawer, collecting your beloved weapon and vision.

Desperately circling your bedroom, you tried to think of a place to hide your items without them being noticed.

Walking around the small room, you heard a creak under your bedpost.

Stepping on the wooden plank, you realized it was loose. Wiggling the board, you were able to see the earthy soil of Liyue under the plank.

Digging with the plank, you made a hole deep enough to leave your items there.

Holding your weapon and vision, you delicately left it in the poorly dug hole before you covered it completely with as much soil as you could pack.

It was sad seeing your items deep in the ground below.

But you had to do what you could to not be caught so early in your undercover work.

Cautiously exiting your bedroom, you tried your elemental sight to see no traces still.

It seems you were able to complete your dirty work in less than 10 minutes.

 As you walked towards the entrance, your foot almost connected with the shopping bags hastily left in the doorway.

 You eyed the clothes suspiciously.

You knew, at least because of the frequency of the dates and his insistence on being exclusive with you, that he wouldn't send you anything weird.

But with your new problems sitting outside watching your house, you knew your lifeline to Yelan and your other agents was completely cut. 

Sighing to yourself before you reached down and grabbed the bags, you looked them over once more using your elemental vision.

The clothes themselves were fine, but well, you just had to confirm what you thought you saw in the bags.

Placing the first two bags on the bamboo table in the kitchen, you opened the expensive, exotic-smelling bags. It was clear they weren't from Liyue, as the material was too thick and heavy for something made for Liyue heat.

Finally, after unwrapping the millions of pieces of tissue paper from the items of interest, a few designer tags fell out.

Well…

You held it up, thinking he sent underwear.

But as you unraveled the scraps of cloth, you felt up the thick white fur that wrapped around what appeared to be the neck when you realized what it was.

"No, he didn't,” you audibly groaned, unable to keep it in your head.

To confirm your theory of what the item was, you stripped your shawl and untied your dress, slipping on the shreds of cloth Pantalone spent 90 million mora on if the price tag was correct.

Unfortunately, as you slid the dress into yourself, it did fit just as a formal qipao would... 

The sleeves were nonexistent, and the three thick cuts of silk and cashmere that fell down to your feet were pretty much an accident waiting to happen. If you moved two inches or the wind even blew past you everything would be revealed to all of Liyue Harbor. 

The fur neckline that wrapped all around your torso to your neck was tight around you, feeling like a choker to the max on you, but in a way, maybe it was a good thing since the back was completely open, only being held by three ribbons of silk, creating a back window.

Maybe a twig can fit in this.

Unfortunately, besides the revealing nature of the dress and the tightness of it, you had to say it would probably be beautiful on anyone else but you, as you were no model that was a firm size 00.

And you werent interested in wearing it in front of the likes of Pantalone either.

embarrassed by the amount of skin you were showing, you tried to get the dress off only to realize it wasn't as easy as it seems since it was so tight fitting to your body.

Walking to look at the other bags, you found an expensive pair of shoes that were actually tasteful, and in your style being thin heels that made them look like they were crafted of ice flowers. The gloves, which were a deep navy blue, were also very beautiful when paired with the ill-fitting dress.

But just as you were starting to make the best of the situation, however, you opened the last bag.

"God, I hate being undercover,” you groaned as the non-existent thong and white bralette were twirling within your grip in front of you.

-

Note: mehhh sorry for the filler this chapter next chapter though is more interesting heh

[inkmemes]

young  royals  (  2021  )  sentence  starters ↪  taken  from  netflix’s  swedish  ya  drama.  non-contextual  spoilers.  trigger  warning  for  mentions  of  sexual  activity,  drugs,  alcohol,  death,  implied  internalised  homophobia,  bullying.  alter  as  you  see  fit  ♡

“at least you can stay for a cup of coffee?”

“hey, wait up. did you sleep together?” 

“he's probably making out with someone. forget it.”

“i can't take it anymore.”

“what are you doing?”

“and he had to finish your sentence. what's going on? you like him.”

“every time you see your dad, you get all depressed.”

“you're still here, so obviously you must want something.”

“are you high? what the hell are you on?”

“does this make you horny?” 

“i like [town name], but i don't want to live here forever.”

“you can leave now. go home. i'm staying here for the weekend.”

“do you want chocolate?”

“how do you feel?” 

“it's kind of hard to tell them apart, you know.” 

“you're a worthless drunk.”

“you … you need to figure out what you want. and you can take all the time you need. and i respect that. but you have to do it by yourself. i don't want to be anyone's secret.”

“you have to stop pretending that you're not afraid.”

“that's the thing, i just don't want that.”

“it's something new. something fresh.”

“can we talk privately for a minute?” 

“and if anyone gives you a hard time, you know, just let me know, and i'll take care of it.” 

“you do know you don't need to hide?” 

“are you gonna let us in?”

“promise to let me know if there's anything i can do.”

“hey, we won't go blind from your moonshine, right?”

“i'm just getting a good vibe. that's all.”

“you're so fucking pathetic.”

“you realize that this will have consequences?”

“he's such a fucking idiot.”

“i wanted us to have a few minutes alone.”

“when you're young, love feels like the most important thing in the world.” 

“i really like you.”

“felt like i had to rescue you from that situation.”

“it got so damn hot in there, i thought i'd get some fresh air.”

“you are allowed your own opinions. it's cool.”

“i've seen the way you look at each other.”

“here, this one is a little big for me, but i think it'll look great on you.”

“do you think royal dick is different than regular?”

“you're the only one here i feel i can actually talk to.” 

“i haven't heard anything yet, but i'll tell you as soon as i do.”

“you can't just lie here jerking off.”

“i don't want to go to some fucking boarding school!”

“i've missed this place so much.”

“are you going to horror movie night on friday?”

“but i like you. and that is not fake.”

“you don't need to share everything.”

“we should go to a concert again sometime.”

“you're fucking crazy!”

“where have you been? i've been trying to reach you.”

“just don't use the school's wi-fi for porn surfing. could be embarrassing.”

“but no matter what, they can't dictate what you say.”

“sorry about last night.”

“i don't want to talk to you!”

“i don't wanna sound like an idiot.”

“i was thinking, would you like to have a sleepover at my place? because that's something friends do. it's going to be really cozy.”

“i think maybe we should forget about that.”

“you can't really see that it is you.”

“i mean, it could be anyone. it's so fucking stupid.”

“i don't want to say anything.” 

“now you're doing it again. you're trying to take care of me.” 

“i can take it, it's okay.”

“that's not true. i haven't spoken to my parents.”

“we haven't done anything wrong.”

“you're beautiful! you're so beautiful.”

“i'm gay, [name].”

“seriously? what the fuck is your problem?”

“you keep letting people piss on you!”

“i just assumed you didn't want special treatment.”

“keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”

“so you thought you'd start spreading false rumours without having any proof?” 

“i just didn't want to lose you.”

“uh, there's pizza left if you want some.”

“everybody thinks you're perfect. you know that, right?”

“he's just been outed.”

“i'm going to fuck this up.”

“he bloody ruined my fucking life!”

“why are you sitting in your room sulking when you have a crush to hang out with?”

“hi. sorry, i was feeling a bit better. so i thought it was okay that i hung out with some friends.”

"everyone should be allowed to live as gay or straight or whatever they want.”

“i woke up in my own bed. that's always something.”

“could i just have one second? just one second alone, please?”

“i’m sorry. but it was, like, the only way.”

“i thought, everyone deserves a second chance.”

“i'm sorry about the mess. i wasn't expecting such distinguished company.”

“i just don't want you to be treated badly again.”

“oh, fuck.”

“you don't even… aren't you even gonna answer me?”

“i didn't know that one was supposed to sign up.”

“in real life, you don't pay to get ahead.”

“and what the fuck does your dad do?”

“let's try to have some table manners.”

“it's, like, really serious.”

“who the hell can live like this for three fucking years?”

“that's what happens when you buy the cheap ones.”

“i need your help with something. ”

“being a prince is not a punishment, but a privilege.”

“it's awesome to just chill out.”

“or maybe he lied about that too. what do i know?”

“you have to give people a chance.”

“you have to try to see it from my perspective.” 

“what the hell's this?”

“what happened to "we should forget about it"?”

“stop being so fucking stubborn and try to understand my situation.”

“sometimes it's better not to say everything.” 

“i was just bored.”

“have you ever had a boyfriend?”

“sometimes it's better to keep quiet.”

“can i get you some coffee?”

“nobody else cares about these things.”

“i lost track of time.”

“everybody does the same things and everybody knows everybody.”

“thanks for rescuing me yesterday.”

“remember when he came up to us the first week and was like, "what's up?"”

“i need you to delete all our texts.”

“i can't keep doing this anymore.”

“are you gonna let them go on with their bullshit?”

“i want to be with you.”

“here's a blanket, a pillow, and bed sheets. there you go.”

“okay, yeah. you don't seem to have grasped what i'm trying to say.”

“it's usually boring as hell.”

“he's been dealing to us for months.”

“i don't want to talk to him.”

“don't you wanna date [name] anymore?”

“i don't know why he's started texting me again. he knows i don't want anything to do with him.” 

“yeah, we had a shitload of drugs.”

“we could murder someone, and nobody would say a word.”

“she needs some fun.”

“he's just doing it to fuck with me.”

“it's such a weird question.”

“i just wanted to say hi. i don't believe we've met. ”

“but i still want us to be friends.”

“if i were to stay here… would you… like to keep me company? just you and me.”

“everything's, like, upside down now.”

“have you always lived here?”

“damn it. sorry. shit. i completely forgot.”

“i'm sure someone has a story to tell.”

“you've got to put yourself first. i mean, no matter what he thinks about it.”

“come on! you can't just sit there stuck in your room.”

“you can snuggle up in my safe arms if it gets scary.”

“i want to live a normal life.”

“let me have a look. you can hardly see it.”

“any other dick that's been sucked?”

“you just expect everything to be on your terms.”

“i want to know everything!”

“you don't have to go there. i'll take care of myself.”

“has anyone ever told you how pretty you are?” 

“i'll just stay in and go to bed early.”

“thanks for explaining the schedule.”

“i'd rather die.”

“i don't want you to be mad.”

“promise to tell me if something is wrong.”

“i can't be dressed like this if you're dressed like that.” 

“it's really complicated.”

“it feels like you don't care what people think about you, or if you have a lot of friends and stuff.” 

“nobody asked you to come. feel free to leave if you want.”

“well, nobody has ever, ever asked for this!” 

“there isn't so much to do around here.”

“you've become such a snob.”

“i know you're only trying to help me.” 

“do you like it here?”

“i don't wanna go in there. we're not even invited. fuck this.”

“don't you think it's weird [name] invited us to come?”

“if they hadn't been here, would you've, uh, made out with me?”

“so, you're an actual proper couple now?”

“you're thinking about someone else.”

“you're right. we're doing this together.”

“thanks… for nothing.”

“why are you even so obsessed with him?”

“i want you to hold me.”

“call me when you want to be picked up.”

“what the fuck do you care?” 

“i don't think we're a couple or anything. i don't know what it is.”

“you never asked me!”

“your focus should be on comforting me so that i can comfort him.” 

“it's not that hard. you have to be able to keep up appearances.”

“famous people make videos like that.”

“maybe somebody forgot to tell me, as usual.”

“just make a move on [name] and show him what you want.”

“you wanna stay a while and jam?”

“have you talked to your parents about it?”

“a diverse bunch of losers, who'll never amount to anything.”

“why can't i decide how the hell i want to live?”

“apparently, i'm the only one who doesn't know everybody.”

“i used to have straight a's on every test.”

“it will damage our reputation.”

“i'm fucking starving.”

“why is it called tax "evasion" but welfare "scam"? it's all right that rich people cheat, but when poor people do it, it's messed up. for rich people, it's not even called "welfare”, it's called "deduction."”

“what the fuck is rowing?”

“what the hell have you done, [name]?”

“good voice, man.”

“why can't i just have a relationship with him?”

“did you have fun last friday?”

“all the people are fake. they're made out of metal.”

what do you want me to say? i'm sorry!”

“is this some kind of prank?”

“i like you when you are yourself!”

“but you like him, don't you?”

“she shouldn't talk to you like that.”

“are you into him?”

“something's not right, i think we should head back to the road.”

“do you have trouble sleeping?”

“doesn't anyone care what i want?”

“just don't tell anyone that i've been here.”

“i was going to text you back, but…”

“your only mistake was that you hung out with the wrong kind of people.”

“i just wanted to help.”

“i know you'll use anything to get high or drunk.” 

“it's time to stop being so selfish.”

“i just want my fucking money.”

“you should've planned ahead. didn't you bring a sandwich?” 

“who the fuck wants to be normal anyway?”

“you fucking told me you were the one i could always come to!”

“i take it back.”

“i can see there's something going on.”

“i have to finish getting ready, so if you could please leave.”

“no one likes me when i'm myself.” 

“i hope you have a nice christmas.”

“i'm gonna do the wrong things, say the wrong things.”

“my mom is gonna kill me.”

“do you remember what you said to me last night?”

“i cannot be dragged into this.”

“i like you too.”

“you're no longer a part of my family.”

“it's well-suited for smaller people.”

“i assume that he thought that it would make him popular.”

“i didn't ask for this!”

“it's no problem. i like doing it.”

“it feels like i'm gonna throw up.”

“don't i get any breakfast?”

“whatever i do, i can't do anything right.”

“we haven't been to any party whatsoever.”

“did you get my texts?”

“i think it sounds romantic.”

“uh, wait, you have to come to the horror movie night on friday.”

“i liked what you said in there, [name].”

“okay, maybe he used to be a player, but love can actually change you.”

“it's nice to make an effort and dress up for dinner.” 

“i'm in a fucked-up situation and i'm trying to talk to you.” 

“you don't understand. i was gonna pay it.”

“you're not that kind of guy.”

“i was about to go outside and, um, do you wanna come with?”

“what about me?” 

“it was… okay, i guess.”

“can i sit with you?”

“you call this a scary movie?”

“i have a million things to take care of, i don't have time to talk to you.”

“have you lost it completely?”

“but i'm starving.”

“this past year has been difficult for me.”

“i don't get it. she's making it into such a big deal.”

“no, this won't work. just take it off, please.” 

“i'm not like that.”

“fuck you. it's not a crush.”

“then i know that i can't count on you.”

“can't you come see me in [town] sometime?”

“it's just that we can't be seen together.” 

“he was still sleeping when i walked in.”

“doesn't bother me at all. i've seen it. absolutely. 100%.”

“[name] is really getting on my nerves! seriously.”

“i want us to be friends again.”

“i thought you and [name] were friends.”

“make sure you check your dms. okay?”

“you think it's fun to fuck with people like me?”

“never spend money you don't have. okay?”

“you think i'm stupid?”

“this sucks.” 

“how nice to see some smiles.”

“this isn't just about me, but my entire family.”

“i'm going to marry her.”

“are you threatening me?”

“don't you realize the shit storm that follows if i come out?” 

“i don't want you to talking to her.”

“remember what we saw during movie night? when they sat next to each other?”

“i love you.”

“i just want to hang out with you.”

"there's no point in having a back-up if you never use it."

“pretend i'm saying something clever.”

“how's [name]? he must be totally devastated.”

“what do you think they think we're talking about?”

“everything is fake. everything in the world is fake.”

“[name] is dead.”

“it just wasn't what i thought it would be like.”

“since when did you start liking him for real?” 

“what a fucking douchebag. god!”

“what the hell are you saying? chill out!”

[everlarkficexchange]

Everlark Fic Exchange. PROMPTS

Springtime Edition 2021.

These are the prompts we’ve received so far.

Crossed out prompts have already been selected and are being turned into fics!

A huge ‘Thank you’ to everyone who’s taken the time to come up with an idea and send it our way. Your prompts are the heart of the Exchange. Without them, our authors wouldn’t get to write all those beautiful fics. So, please, keep them coming!

You haven’t sent anything yet? Don’t worry, there’s still time. We’ll be receiving prompts until March 7.  Don’t be afraid to inspire us!

Prompts:

Prompt 1: “No, I noticed just about every girl, but none of them made a lasting impression but you.” (Peeta’s pov of the girls who made impressions that didn’t last and the ones Katniss made that did.) [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 2: “Luck Is What Happens When Preparation Meets Opportunity” - When they are assigned to the same group in middleschool Home Ec class, Peeta seizes the opportunity to pursue Katniss using all his well-honed family bakery and salesmanship skills. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 3: I would like to see some everlark where Finnick walks in on them or Johanna and the there victors make fun of them for what they heard [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 4: Trope: Jealousy Katniss. Modern AU Katniss Everdeen sees his ex boyfriend as the date of one of her coworkers in the company party. She shouldn’t care, because she broke with him, one year ago and still.... when their song plays, against her better judgements, she finds herself dancing with him. [submitted by @alwayseverlark]

Prompt 5: Peeta and Katniss were both rescued in the arena and Peeta shares a bunk in D13 with Finnick - Finnick was sleeping and Peeta and Katniss doesn't see him there in the dark hours while they are tangled in lust and desire - either when everlark is doing it and realizes finnick is there or maybe finnicks POV as he is listening silently or even telling Johanna about it the next day - maybe he even stops them mid fuck with a snide sarcastic remark it's up to you [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 6: Modern AU. High School or College Everlark. Make the “booth Kiss” but Everlark! Peeta is the big brother of Katniss best friend, and she never imagined rule number #9 would become a problem. “Rule #9: Relatives of your best friend are off-limits.” [submitted by @alwayseverlark]

Prompt 7: Prompt: Butthurt emotionally immature Peeta acts the asshat manwhore around Katniss when, in misinterpreting her, he believes that she thinks he’s not good enough for her. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 8: Age gap. Peeta and Katniss are cast as the romantic leads in a show (tv, film, stage, or even a commercial). Of course they cast someone half his age. Peeta can’t help falling for her anyway. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 9: Canon-Divergent/ In Panem D12 “I waited for you” he said but she dint’t reply. He pressed for an answer he knew he deserved, “under the rain, Katniss. I waited for you, under the rain... why would you do that?” / “I can’t do this anymore, Peeta” / “Bullshit, you can but you just don’t want. I thought you were brave!” he yelled at her looking for any reaction that will give some hope. His tears threatening to run down his face. / She didn’t move, and she didn’t correct her, so he ran away and slammed the door behind him. / “I love you” Katniss said to an empty room. [submitted by @alwayseverlark]

Prompt 10: Canon Divergent. When Peeta is rescued from the Capitol and brought to D13, he’s forgotten everything related to Katniss. The Capitol has erased his memories: no Valley Song, no bread, no games, ... nothing. It’s the perfect opportunity for Katniss to let it go, it’s what every tells her... but she still kisses his pearl goodnight. [submitted by @alwayseverlark]

Prompt 11: Prim is marrying before starting her dream job as a pediatric surgeon in another district. 30-something Katniss is proud, thrilled, and yet bereft when her entire life was lived for Prim. She’s never even dated. Has Peeta been waiting for this moment to make his move? Or do they meet at the wedding? Or when her friend drags Katniss out of her slump to a party or on a wild vacation after convincing her to quit her jobs and start a new life? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 12: Fae Katniss. She’s been with him his entire life, so Peeta simply accepted that no one else could see her, thought other people had their own Katniss. She’d been called his imaginary friend and later a crutch, a figment of his imagination, a delusion. Dr. A asks him to make a “real” friend, ignore Katniss, try going on a date. But Katniss won’t be ignored. And a jealous Katniss is a force. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 13: Katniss is “just one of the guys” and the only girl in school who’s never been asked for a date by any of these guys. One day she’s “discovered” by a modeling agency and whisked to the Capital. She returns 3-months later with a new look, new found confidence, and cash. How will Peeta deal with the new Katniss and all the attention she gets from everyone?  [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 14: Peeta is 17 when it comes out the only thing his mother ever cooked was the books; he loses his home, his family, his roll in the community. Katniss is 17 when she loses her only reason for living. What brings them together? How do they help each other survive? What forces work against them? When do they accept the other as ally, as friend, as lover? Canon divergent. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 15: 16-yr-old Peeta’s family moves away. 10 years later he returns and buys a foreclosed upon fixer-upper. When does he learn it belonged to Katniss’s family? She still lives there and hides from him, observes him, haunts him, and ruins all his romantic dates when he’s trying to impress women by making them dinner. Does she learn all she needs to know about him and fall in love before he discovers she’s real and living with him and the one who’s been ruining his love life? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 16: canon divergent, arranged marriage. Many, many years after the rebellion, old victor and mockingjay Haymitch living alone finally starts accepting help, hires teenagers Katniss to bring him liquor and pick up packages and Peeta to bring food and do some chores. The old man sees how the 2 could be good for each other, and being strategic, manipulative, and an old romantic fool with regrets over “the one that got away,” he writes a will leaving his huge fortune to Peeta and Katniss on the condition they have a big romantic wedding within 30 days and live in his mansion caring for his Effie Rose Garden (“Creamy buds unfurl to reveal a memorable heart of buttery yellow, dusty apricot and zesty orange. From a cupped bloom, Rose Effie gradually opens to a perfect rosette, showcasing her splendor.”) And geese.  [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 17: AU, supernatural. “The Monkey's Paw" retelling - 3 wishes are granted (to the owner of the monkey's paw, either Katniss or Peeta) but the wishes come with an enormous price for interfering with fate. Will the last wish make things right? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 18: enemies to lovers. Katniss ruins Peeta’s relationship or his shot with a super hot woman. Peeta ruins Katniss’s shot at great job or security with potential fiancé. Other series of embarrassments and cockblocking type events? Will they start sabotaging each other for revenge? Will they have angry sex or will it dawn on them that they’re actually attracted to each other first and make everything awkward before they instead have a sweet vulnerable moment and slow reverent love-making? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 19: based loosely on retelling of biblical Jacob and wives Rachel and Leah in that polygamist Peeta is husband to both Katniss and Prim. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 20: Peeta works in ER or long-term care facility. Katniss called in from next-of-kin list and has to decide whether to pull the plug on Prim. They argue over value and meaning of life, over spiritual beliefs and doubts of afterlife, over everything. What will she do? Will this event in this one room be the only thing they ever share, or will the bond they forge through this emotional event be the beginning for them? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 21: Graduating senior Katniss finally accepts an invitation to one of Madge’s wild, unsupervised parties completely unprepared for what goes on in them. Everyone at the party notices her for different reasons from jealousy over the way she looks to suspicion that she’s going to tell parents about the activities to desire to ruin her good girl reputation. Peeta has never missed a party - how does he react to seeing her there? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 22: Their creative writing assignment is to write a short story or poem and to illustrate it as a sketch, painting, animation, with puppets, anything goes. Classmates Katniss and Peeta base their works on the exact same shared experience! (such as the burnt bread, the dandelion, the meadow at sunset, something else entirely). Reaction? People think one of them copied the idea off the other or that they worked together. But Katniss and Peeta realize that the other one remembers, and it meant something to them, too! Will they finally talk? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 23: social media type craziness enemies to lovers. Katniss and Peeta each host a YouTube channel rapidly growing in popularity, Peeta focuses on baking and Katniss on wild game cooking, a competition for audience share becomes personal after they both bake a meat pie recipe, viewers begin to rabidly support their favorite or to ship them together hard, they start to hate each other without ever meeting, maybe they get forced into interacting for a charity benefit, things get ugly, maybe one or both has significant other who react badly to the shipping hype? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 24: While no one expected Katniss to show up to graduation right after her mother passed away and her sister died, they were surprised that she disappeared completely, and even more stunned when she reappeared years later to claim the town’s only apothecary as the last living family member. What compels her to take it over? Where has she been? What kind of welcome does she get? How does she feel about returning and about town life? What’s been going on with Peeta, is he the baker, is he single, a dad, how’s he been all these years? Will talking with him be awkward? Has he changed? Who has Katniss become? Does she seem different? Will she stay? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 25: Katniss is the new girl at this school, transferred to get a better education. Everything about her is alluring, even more so because she doesn’t see the effect she has. Seems everyone is in a clique. She learns that some people are mean and compete like it’s a fight to the death. How does she survive this new arena, learn to identify friends, and stay true to her values under this pressure to fit in? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 26: MJ canon divergent: Prim was not killed. Gale and Katniss attempted to get back to how they were before the war, but he realized he already lost Katniss' to Peeta - heart, body and soul. Any POV. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 27: Everlark in a Tangled!AU, with Katniss as Eugene, and Peeta as Rapunzel (without the super long hair...he has lovely, curly blond locks that heal when combed along to the song...but boy uses a rope to get people in/out of the tower!) [submitted by @albinokittens300]

Prompt 28: Modern AU: Bestfriends!Everlark took their shot at being lovers. But Katniss introduced Peeta as her "bestfriend" to a guy in a party (she was not used to calling him boyfriend yet). He was furious. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 29: I want to request a fic where Katniss and Peeta almost lost their first child and it just made their love and relationship even stronger. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 30: Peeta is Katniss’ tantric yoga teacher. She joins the class on a dare from Johanna and is committed to attending for 3 months. She hates it...at first. Smut happens. [submitted by @mrspeetamellark]

Prompt 31: Peeta Mellark, breakout star and heartthrob has just been cast in the newest highly anticipated fantasy epic (think like Jon Snow in GoT....or whatever because this is just a prompt) His character is highly skilled with a sword and absolutely lethal with a bow. Him and the rest of the cast have to do three months of intensive training prior to production. How will that go with him having a massive crush on Katniss Everdeen, weapons expert and fight choreographer? [submitted by @nightlock-89]

Prompt 32: Katniss Everdeen, famous musician hates posing for photoshoots whether it's for an album or a magazine with the exception of celebrity photographer Peeta Mellark who seems to always know the way to get the best shots. [submitted by @nightlock-89​]

Prompt 33: Based off the movie The Vow except it's Peeta who wakes up to find out he's married to his childhood crush Katniss Everdeen with no knowledge of them ever even dating. [submitted by @nightlock-89​​]

Prompt 34: Modern AU where a forty year old Katniss has shut herself off from the world from fear of getting hurt. After her sister dies she realizes how isolated she is and now wants to open herself up to love, but hasn’t a clue where to begin. Everlark HEA - the details of how they meet and what Peeta’s been up to are entirely up to you. :) [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 35: Katniss and Peeta tet to have a date night but the babysitter calls for some "disaster" at home (a burst pipe or something, nothing serious). [submitted by @booksrockmyface]

Prompt 36: Katniss and Peeta are both single parents. They meet while chaperoning a field trip. The rest is up to you! [submitted by @mrspeetamellark]

Prompt 37: Forbidden romance AU: Katniss is the school principal. Peeta is a new teacher fresh out of college. Age!gap Everlark. Smut happens. [submitted by @mrspeetamellark]

Prompt 38: Both Katniss and Peeta are rescued from the arena, and Peeta’s entire family makes it safely to D13. How does everyone get along? (Perhaps the older Mellark brothers have a “chat” with Gale? Or the Hawthornes, Mellarks and Everdeens meet up for the first time at dinner and a fight breaks out? Does anyone have anything to say about the beach kiss?? Prim? Rye? Gale? Will Katniss stick by Peeta or avoid meeting the expectations she set with that beach kiss and declaration of “I need you”?) [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 39: Katniss has been bumping into the same stranger (Peeta) for months. When they get stuck in an unfortunate situation together, she decides to be the first to say hello. [submitted by @eiramrelyat]

Prompt 40: Katniss is finally, after a long fight with infertility, expecting their second baby. She plans to share this news with Peeta in a big way. Just some sweet, happy Everlark excited for their second toastbaby! [submitted by @albinokittens300]

Prompt 41: based on high school musical. katniss as gabriella, the smart, great singer and shy girl who starts a friendship w the football star player of the school peeta mellark after singing together at a new year's day's party. could be based on the events of one or all three movies. just some light, fluff high school romance and a very hea. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 42: Group of friends. Economic disaster, no jobs; eventually in desperation someone in the group suggests making a porno for $, the idea takes off, as they work on a script and put out ideas, alot becomes clear, like who has kinks, who has tried a lot, and that one is an inexperienced virgin. Does the writing experience have consequences to the group dynamic, will they actually film and sell it, will they stay friends? Are any couples or siblings part of the group? Are secrets revealed through brainstorming? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 43: After getting her to agree to be his girlfriend, Gale calls Katniss frigid for not being ready for more than handholding and chaste kisses. In effort thaw her faster, he makes an appointment with a team of sex experts, Mellark, Mason, and Undersee (offering MD diagnostics, individual and couple counseling, sex surrogacy help). The professional team breaks under strain of dealing with jackass Gale. Katniss breaks all ties with him and learns in working with the team that she wants sex and just how she likes it. (Is it M/F, F/F, 3-way...) [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 44: First-date Everlark. How do they know each other? Who asked who? How do they prepare? Where do they go? How old are they? Does the first date end with a kiss? Pancakes? Request for another? Is it perfect or a disaster so epic they actually have fun and agree to a second first-date? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 45: Peeta works security (peacekeeper? police?), Katniss is a protester (rebellion? BLM?) or a civilian (rebel?) or a local translator in her village. Do they know each other at all? Work together? Fight on opposite sides or meet at common ground? What threatens them? Are their feelings real? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 46: They really do toast privately in CF - katniss wearing an orange dress for peeta and peeta making cheese buns for katniss. They wanted something their own. No one knows about it and there’s no baby (as far they know) but how would this change their relationship? How they make their decisions? Would anyone actually believe they’re married when she gets to district 13? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 47: Katniss and peeta have a secret semi-relationship prior to the 74th games resulting in a child. Katniss’ family hides it was her pregnancy and pretends its mrs everdeens - assuming katniss went to cray or something. What happens when both katniss and peeta are reaped? Will peeta learn of his child? Will anything change during the games? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 48: Mrs. Mellark survived the bombing of district 12 because she was squatting at Peeta’s house. How does this event change her and how does this effect Everlark? (Does this count as an eligible prompt? I just think it would be a great dynamic!) [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 49: Age gap. Peeta is a kid in love, driven to enlist, returns as amputee, expects no woman will have him, let alone Katniss. She has become a skilled healer, comes to care for him. He makes her heart full again, she renews him. Age becomes irrelevant. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 50: Fae Peeta or some other supernatural. Mellarks are secretly fae and Peeta meets his mate *Katniss* on the first day of school. katniss is human and it’s dangerous for them to interact when they are so young still. Peeta is forbidden to interact with her until the 74th games - where he will do everything he can to save her. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 51: Katniss and Peeta unknowingly have super powers. Anything beyond regular human is rare or unheard of in Panem. For some reason it manifests in both of them and comes out as they both fight to protect each other’s lives in the games. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 52: An AU based on Casper The movie from 1995 (just rewatched this movie, it gaves me so much EverLark vibes^^). Katniss comes to live in an old house alone or with family. Peeta is a ghost staying in this house for who knows how long. He doesn't remember much of his living life. The house is full of secrets. They try to discover the story of Peeta and of course they fell in love ! How can it be a happy ending ? 😉 [submitted by @dreamingreaderuniverse]

Prompt 53: Peeta has a harder time after the 74th games then anyone realizes. PTSD, the virtual abandonment of his family, and Katniss’ lack of interest in him, he’s in a bad place. He puts up a front when around Katniss and Haymitch, but things come to head when he gets an anxiety/panic attack while on the victory tour. Katniss is there for him. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 54: Madge has hosted “Beach Week!” ever since her family acquired the multi-dwelling retreat years ago. Katniss never had the $ to go, but with Madge relocating to Paris, Katniss lets Madge cover her share of the expenses with the promise to make it the best! week! ever! Katniss assumes Madge means taking a turn at karaoke or *gulp* going skinny dipping by moonlight. She learns that Madge and her many guests shed all inhibitions, especially with this being their last chance to go wild. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 55: Arriving in D13, it’s quickly discovered that Peeta will never be the same. Mixed with a failed high jacking, and a brutal beating, Peeta’s brain will never be the same. He’s childlike and mostly nonverbal, but Katniss still sees her Boy with Bread and will protect him at all costs.[submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 56: Peeta wasn’t highjacked in MJ. He was tortured, but not set against Katniss. After Peeta’s warning to D13 he receives the punishment for treason: he becomes an avox. [submitted by @kiinghanalister]

Prompt 57: Girl Scout Cookies come to D12: real world trackerjacker venom to a proud 4th generation baker. Is his own daughter a new scout? Is he asked to lead the fundraiser? Does troop leader Katniss come by with her scouts asking to set up a sales table in front of Mellark Bakery? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 58: Katniss’s grandchild is full of questions: why does grandpa walk funny? why is your yard have only dandelions when everybody else only has grass? why can’t I pick the prim roses - they’re yellow, too ... did you know I could eat this many cheesebuns? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 59: Katniss dad is a victor he won his hunger games and is a mentor. Peeta is reaped for the games and Katniss begs her dad to help him win the games. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 60: Quote prompt: I can see in his eyes what I've done is unforgivable ... "Who can't lie, Peeta?" (Maybe Katniss and Mrs Mellark manipulate situation to get what they think is best for Peeta, sacrificing relationship and destroying trust? Does he leave for years? Does she ever apologize enough to renew a friendship? Was he forced to live a different life than what he wanted? Or does he live his dream life but without Katniss? Is he happily married with kids when she sees him a few years later? Or is he an old bitter man who never loved or trusted again?) [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 61: The Hunger Games is real - you can go home with your winnings to live HEA. Katniss and Peeta celebrate with sex. Unfortunately, the beauty treatment chemicals stimulate the gonads, and Katniss finds she’s carrying not just one Mellark baby but eight. They’ll need more $. Haymitch suggests a reality tv show. Everyone must play a roll to earn a salary - Mrs Mellark plays the loving grandma (off camera, she’s still a mean bitch), who else will take on a tv persona? They jam in many ridiculous product placements. They slap their logo onto anything they can sell to capitolites. How far will they go to keep those baby butts in clean diapers? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 62: Katniss is the football team’s new kicker and the league’s first and only female player. It’s their first road trip. She’d heard stories about what goes on from head cheerleader Madge and piccolo player Delly. Katniss deals with locker room issues, getting respect she earned for her skill, handling the culture of drinking and casual sex, dealing with possessive girls jealous of her time with the guys or others influencing her to change her look or her attitude, finding what makes her happy and what is real. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 63: Enemies to lovers; Katniss and Peeta are rival business owners (located right next door to each other). A blackout during a snowstorm pushes them together and they are forced to face their true feelings. Do that really "hate" each other, or is their intense desire for one another manifesting itself in other ways? Before the night is over, they find themselves locked in the other's arms. [submitted by @ameliaodair]

Prompt 64: Katniss and Peeta are in a scary car accident - bring on the angst! With happy ending of course :) [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 65: 74th games - Katniss is being cornered by a male tribute (whoever you want) early on in the games. She doesn’t have her bow and he’s larger and stronger. He quickly over powers her but he’s not looking to kill her - he has more nefarious ideas. Peeta finds them and doesn’t hesitate to tackle the tribute off of Katniss and kills him in rage. Katniss doesn’t leave Peeta’s side after this moment. How does this change Katniss and the rest of the books? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 66: A story told in pictures. Like, Instagram of their stuff only, as Katniss and Peeta get in to college, change roommates, suffer loss, move on, eventually see their stuff together when they cohabitate, or maybe start there and go through drama of breakup until find way back together. (Like the supposition that your garden looks overgrown is a clue that your husband is having an affair type of idea). [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 67: 🌈❤️🦋Katniss and Peeta are the cutest couple!🌸❤️🦄Everbody hates them. Everyone tries to break them up, for their own reason, using their own methods. Damn it, it only makes their love stronger! It ends in some triumph, like celebration of their golden anniversary or other great fortune. [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 68: Katniss always wanted to be a mother, she just never wanted to admit it with the Games hanging over everyone’s heads. So when the war is over and everything is real for Katniss and Peeta, she’s wants to start a family with Peeta. Only- Peeta has never wanted kids. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 69: It’s the start of the holiday shopping season. The Hunger Games Victors’ big public event is attending the grand opening of a huge new toy store where they are presented with hottest must-have new toys: action figures of themselves. Afterwards, they start playing with their dolls. Johanna’s is quickly naked. Is Finnick’s anatomically correct? Anyone jealous of Katniss’s doll coming with the Cinna Collection accessories? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 70: Everlark AU Where the Heart Is (movie) - heavily pregnant Katniss is abandoned at a Walmart in the middle of nowhere by her baby daddy. Homeless and with nowhere to go, Katniss secretly bunks at Walmart each day. One early morning she goes into labor and is discovered by the blue eyed and kind employee Peeta who immediately jumps in to help. Admitting to having no one or place to go to Nurse Effie, Katniss finds herself and her baby the reluctant charge of Haymitch Abernathy. [submitted by @kiinghanalister]

Prompt 71: Magic of Ordinary Days AU: 1940s, Katniss is a single pregnant girl. Desperate for her daughter not to have a child out of wedlock, Mrs Everdeen contacts a priest who in turn knows a young man who just may be willing to help. Sweet, kind and shy Peeta stayed home to take care of the family farm when his beloved brother went to war to never come back. He’s always wanted a family but rural small town life gives little chance to court. He hears of Katniss’ plight and graciously offers to marry her and raise the child as his own. He does everything he can think of to make a home for Katniss and the baby. How does Katniss take it? How does their relationship develop? Will they fall in love? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 72: Post MJ Everlark Parallel to the CF Scene that takes place after the jabberjay hour. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 73: Katniss looses a baby before they have Toastbaby one [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 74: Con man Peeta has an elaborate operation fleecing money out of unsuspecting wealthy victims. Why does he do it? Is it a Robin Hood type operation to redistribute money to the underprivileged and marginalized people? Or is it more selfishly oriented? He can’t do it alone and hires Katniss as a “research assistant.” Authors choice as to what exactly her role is. Does she help select the victims? The recipients of the funds? Or is she involved in planning and executing the cons? Does she help him discover the errors of his ways if he’s doing it for himself? Whatever the plan is, falling in love is not part of it and when you lose focus of the plan, bad things happen. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 75: Black swan style AU with Peeta as Odette and/or Odelle. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 76: Vignettes from a mother’s eye. Everlark through the eyes of Mrs Everdeen, Mrs Mellark, Mrs Hawthorne. One of them or any combination of the three. Canon compliant or any AU. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 77: Married Everlark are coworkers and their marriage is on the rocks. They’ve been sleeping in separate rooms. Divorce looks inevitable. On a business trip, there is *dramatic pause* only one bed. Does the forced closeness lead them to really talk for the first time in months or does it drive them further apart? Smut not required. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 78: Everlark in their twilight years. What do their relationships with the toastbabies look like? Are there grandkids? [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 79: This holiday is dumb, Katniss says every year even as Peeta goes all out with the traditions, decorations, themed baked goods, cajoling Katniss to partake in activities. Now there’s a toastbaby on the way and for some reason, Peeta doesn’t do any of the things he usually does for the holiday. How does Katniss react? Relieved? Or does she realize she actually loves his zeal and tries to spark the spirit back into him? Writer picks the holiday and level of cheesy fluff. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 80: How does that work? They were roommates and best friends. When they meet a couple who has a common law marriage, Everlark starts to wonder if it applies to them too. Go angsty or fluffy or crazy, wherever the muse takes you. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 81: Shakespearean style AU in the vein of Still Star Crossed. Katniss and Peeta were not the famed star crossed lovers. Someone else was. But while the deaths of their best friends are still fresh, Katniss and Peeta find themselves in an arranged marriage to hopefully heal the rift. Tell me their story. Any time period or setting welcome. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 82: Everlark + Taylor Swift. I'll make it easy. Any song, write a fic based on it. Are Katniss or Peeta the songwriter, or the ones living out the ending? [submitted by @archersandsunsets]

Prompt 83: Katniss gets stung by tracker jackers post mj, Peeta take care of his wife [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 84: Elementary School - the beginning of having a “girlfriend/boyfriend” - Katniss’s best friends (Maggie and Gale) are the “it couple”. She really doesn’t care - she can sit with her friend Jo at lunch and hangs out on the monkey bars alone. Until a new boy comes to school! [submitted by @winegirl65]

Prompt 85: Arranged Marriage!Everlark. (Not medieval necessarily but ‘old time’ setting) Peeta and Katniss have been betrothed since they were children, but have only seen each other through portraits/paintings. Both grow resentful of their arranged marriage, and act up against it; K being as wild and unladylike as possible: hunting, wearing trousers, riding bareback; P being a rake, silver tongue con artist, etc. A month before their wedding, they meet at a The Hub (black market/pub/whatever disresputable place you want it to be) and bet at arm wrestling against each other. Is it love at first sight? Do they armwrestle each other? Do they recognize one another? Will there be smut because ‘hey, we’ll be marry in a month anyway’? Writers choice! [submitted by @alliswell21]

Prompt 86: Katniss is married to Gale, but they have an open marriage. Gale sleeps around and has other girlfriends, but Katniss is only intimide with her best friend, Peeta - extra brownie points if Everlark have toast babies or Kat leaves Gale for Peeta. Thank you! [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 87: Katniss is desperate for a job. She applies for a job with the following description, even though she isn’t fully qualified: We are looking to hire a Data Analyst to join our data team. You will take responsibility for managing our master data set, developing reports, and troubleshooting data issues. To do well in this role you need a very fine eye for detail, experience as a data analyst, and a deep understanding of the popular data analysis tools and databases.Peeta’s just doing his friend a favor, applying for a job he’s definitely not qualified for in order to keep an eye on his friend’s crazy uncle.What happens when Katniss and Peeta are the only applicants for the job of data analyst to Supervillain Haymitch? Will they find a way to both get what they need? Do they stick to the job description or discover that there’s much more to the phrase “Others duties as assigned”? What about Haymitch? His nefarious plans always go awry, and actually don’t seem all that evil, but perhaps with the help of his two questionable new data analysts, he can finally expose two-faced Superhero Coin for the dastardly villain she is. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 88: Peeta designs “toys” for his adult shop. He hires Katniss to test his products, she has to fill a questionnaire for feed back or something of the sort. One day she comes in complaining that one of the toys doesn’t work; Peeta thinks she’s not using it properly, so he sits in to watch her try it once more... “to take notes”. She is indeed using it wrong, so he steps in to show her the correct way. [submitted by @alliswell21]

Prompt 89: If Prim and Peeta are never reaped, and Mrs Mellark and Prim die after the 75th Games, and widower Mr Mellark marries widow Mrs Everdeen, what would happen to Katniss? We know from the book that her mom would leave her. And, what would Peeta do? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 90: The Olympic committee is selling sponsorships and heavily advertising the upcoming games. The most photogenic of each sport is asked to pose for pics and attend functions, film commercial together, do some interviews. What sports represented by Katniss, Peeta, others? Required to look cozy? Animosity behind those smiles? Competitiveness? Banter? Any secrets? Do they have a “breakfast club” ending? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 91: Katniss senses something is amiss before the bakery door opens: chaos as Mr. Mellark incapacitated (throws out back?) on one of their busiest days! Mrs M never acknowledged K before, but they desperately need kitchen help, now! And K is more than capable of working hard. A bargain is struck to clean up and follow all other directions thrown at her in exchange for bread and coin. Hard negotiations? Peeta’s reaction? Is it Katniss and all 3 boys in the back? Do the older 2 know her? Any talking? How does the long day go? Does it end well for Peeta? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 92: Years later, the blocked mine shaft is finally cleared, and the bodies are recovered. Will recovery of her father’s remains help Katniss or make things worse? Will the community do anything to honor the men? Will the Everdeens get any personal effects, did he leave a message for Katniss? Will there be evidence that leads to prosecution and $ settlement? Will Peeta, Gale, community, mom, Prim be there to support K? Who can she talk to? Is she changed? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 93: Mr Hawthorne doesn’t die in the mine explosion. It’s he who Katniss meets in the woods and becomes her hunting partner, and eventually a father figure when he starts offering advice on what to do once she graduates. He sees how the baker’s son acts, but he has 3 sons who need strong, hard-working and skilled wives, and he saw Mrs E leave town life behind. Peeta never sees K with Gale - what impact does that have on him? Does Mr H speak of rebellion or does he stay quiet on the subject? Does Katniss see the Hawthorns happily married and modify views on marriage if not on raising a family? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 94: Chris Pratt was a “kick ass” door to door coupon salesman. That could be Peeta! Vacuum cleaner sales, and he has to come in for a demonstration! He’s charming, but does his pitch earn him a sale? Does his cleaner choke on all the cat hair from buttercup? Does the powerful unit suck up something of value? Is it even her house or is she house sitting and wasting his time? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 95: Peeta is also rescued or ah least when he is saved from the capitol he isn’t hijacked which leads to katniss and peeta finally dating - Johanna and finnick still make fun of the happy couple about being so “pure” and one day they have enough - either they purposely do the deed loudly or something in front of them or whatever it is, make it steamy! Or.......peeta exxagerates and tells finnick and Johanna what they have done together in an attempt to prove how unpure they are and Katniss overhears and finally does all the things peeta was explaining [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 96: The Games ended with the rebellion years ago, but now you can “experience all the excitement for yourself at Disney’s newest theme park The Hunger Games! Take a wild train ride into a real replica arena! Experience the thrill of virtually racing to the 3-D weapons pile then trade your kill count tickets in for arcade prizes! Flex your muscles swinging real replica axes and swords! Try on costumes, or enjoy a spa day at Beauty Base Zero! Enjoy an all-you-can-eat meal at The Cornucopia Buffet!” So, who wants to go? Or, who works there? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 97: Everlark cuddling. That’s it. That’s the prompt. [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 98: Toned, nubile, athletic Katniss and Peeta are hired as stunt and body doubles for a couple of famous film actors who have been liberally airbrushed for the promo pics. The $ is good. No one can know. A lot of nudity. No dialogue, just well timed grunts and groans. One talks a lot when nervous between takes. Some embarrassing moments. Friendship and trust built over time. When it’s over, can they walk away? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 99: I want a smutty filled fanfic in d13 if Peeta wasnt hijacked and or captured. Are they in a relationship? How does this change Katniss’ relationship with Gale? What does Johanna think of it all? Does Finnick make fun of them but slap Peeta on the back? Does Mrs. Everdeen have an awkward conversation with Katniss about birth control? Does anyone overhear or walk in? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 100: Can be modern canon compliant divergent or whatever but with Johanna and Finnick and or Haymitch talking about Everlark and what they have or haven’t done yet. They all make a bet to see who is right and how far the star crossed lovers have taken there physical and emotional relationship. Extra points if Finnick knowingly smiles at Peeta or Everlark tells them who is right. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 101: Artist Peeta’s niche: option 1: pets - portraits dressed in period costumes with or without owner, or perfectly painted on sugar cookie, other medium? Does Prim want it, or does Katniss surprise gift it to Prim? Buttercup or Lady? In studio or outdoors? Is K indulgent or exasperated? option 2: uptight Katniss discovers that Prim had erotic boudoir photos taken of herself, and neither she nor photographer Peeta told her! She would have stopped Prim. Who is Peeta to katniss? Is Peeta insulted by what she spews out about his job and art? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 102: Peeta and Katniss are both made to wait outside the principals office. One of them in trouble for getting into a fight. The other ? Conversation started by the one not seething. As the hour drags on, they discover common ground and attraction. Suddenly, principal opens office door, and the moment is gone. Do they find way to each other at school? Or in big high school, do they happen to see each other years later under very different circumstances? [submitted by @567inpanem]

Prompt 103: Nonhijacked Peeta in d13 needs advice from Finnick about well, you know, how to fuck a girl. And well Katniss goes to Johanna or Annie for the same thing. Will Finnick and Johanna and or Annie tell each other about Katniss and Peeta asking advice? Will they purposely sabotage Everlark by giving them funny bad advice? Will they purposely and awkwardly talk about it at lunch with Gale there? Up to you but make it funny and hot [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 104: Everlark before the quell starts to get intimate, when it dawns on them that Katniss doesn’t want to get pregnant and frankly, either does Peeta however this is something they want to experience. So what do they do? Ask Panem’s biggest heartthrob Finnick for some condoms. Hopefully when the victors have training the next day at lunch, Finnick hasn’t told anyone. Hopefully....😏 [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 105: Katniss is lucky enough to be upgraded to First Class on a flight home to visit her mother and younger sister. Little does she know that onboard is one of Panem’s most important, and consequently, most handsome men, and he takes a shining to her. [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 106: Peeta is a pearl diver/diver/oceanographer. He’s been looking for the perfect way to propose to his longtime girlfriend, Katniss, and thinks he’s found it when he discovers a rare pearl under the sea. The problem is, Katniss isn’t the only one who appreciates his find. [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 107: When her boyfriend cheats, Katniss gets her revenge by making a pass at her boyfriend’s greatest enemy. She only intended to flirt with him to piss off her cheating ex, but things spiral out of control, and they wind up in a dangerously passionate entanglement. [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 108: Everlark fall for one another over a blood transfusion. It happens not once, but twice. His blood runs through her veins, and now hers runs through his. What are the odds they would save each other’s lives? [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 109: Haymitch as a matchmaker. Nuff’ said. His matches are always disasters, but one time, he gets it exactly right when he sets up his neighbors, a stoic girl with a braid and a lonely, blond baker boy. [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 110: A group of bachelorettes/bridesmaids kidnap groom-to-be, Peeta Mellark, in order to convince him that he's marrying the wrong woman, and that he should, in fact, be with their friend and fellow bridesmaid, Katniss Everdeen. [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 111: Peeta is a struggling post-graduate art major. He finally finds a place he can afford because the landlord cuts him some slack on the rent. One day, his landlord becomes ill/injured and his daughter/niece takes over. Peeta's instantly smitten with her, but she insists on the full rent. Will Peeta find a way to pay his sexy landlord? Can he also win her heart? [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 112: Katniss's family owns a Mexican restaurant. Peeta and his friends come in, and he's immediately captivated by her. He keeps coming back, hoping to win her over, but he makes the mistake of inadvertently insulting her/her family. Can he make amends? Will she ever go out with him? [submitted by @mandelion82]

Prompt 113: she’s the man au featuring katniss and gale as the twins, peeta as duke, and madge as Olivia. [submitted by @thegirlwhowokethedreamer]

Prompt 114: Inspired by THIS picture I found - finnick understands Peeta and katniss' love for one another in his point of view [submitted by @everlark-always]

Prompt 115: Post mockingjay, everlark picnic in the meadow, with child or without whatever you feel I just want happy thriving everlark post war [submitted by @everlark-always]

Prompt 116: Hades Peeta and Persephone Katniss fanfic. Maybe Katniss is being abused or needs a reason to leave Olympus and Peeta provides that for her or Peeta just takes her. Peeta may bit of a douche or even dark!Peeta but the two warm up to each other eventually. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 117: Dark!Peeta fanfic where he is a stalker, kidnapper, or serial killer. But he does all of these things because it’s his way of protecting Katniss and ensuring they will be together. Katniss finds out in the end and chaos ensues [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 118: Under the Tuscan Sun AU: Reeling from the breakdown of her marriage due to her partner's infidelity, and struggling to follow up a successful book release, Katniss's friends book her a trip on a bus tour through Tuscany, Italy, to try and help her move on. When she accidentally ends up buying a villa in the Tuscan countryside, she finds not only new inspiration but a new chance at love in the form of her blonde-haired contractor, Peeta Mellark. [submitted by @thelettersfromnoone]

Prompt 119: what if Katniss and Peeta didn't get interrupted by finnick that night on the beach in the quell? Would they have kept going? Would the outcome of the night change since that new relationship step where they absolutely would have refused to be seperated? [submitted by @everlark-always]

Prompt 120: In the blast in THG, Katniss loses hearing in BOTH ears - she's miraculously able to hear the announcement of the 2 tributes from the same district (maybe it's just super muffled??) how does katniss handle the rest of the games without her hearing? how is peeta able to communicate with her? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 121: Secret lovers!Everlark, aged 20s: They've been a group of friends with Gale and Finnick. Katniss has always been "one of the boys" and seemed uninterested with boys... until Peeta and she had this drunken confession night and they've been hiding kisses and touches since. Summer in a few weeks, they want to go officially together to their annual beach trip, and they start planning how to break it to their friends gently... especially to Gale whom she turned down in college. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 122: a day in the bakery with Peeta and Katniss ... could be modern or in Panem ... I’ve just been watching a lot of Korean cafe videos and I need detailed descriptions of cake and cute couple moments 🍰 [submitted by @rosegardeninwinter]

Prompt 123: wholesome late 1700s Austen-esque romance with local country pastor Peeta (a la Henry Tilney) and his pretty, windswept parishioner, Miss Katniss Everdeen (a la any Austen heroine) with the angelic singing voice and dandelion trimmed bonnet [submitted by @rosegardeninwinter]

Prompt 124: The war is over, Peeta has been home for 6 months and things have been gradually better between him and Katniss. Just as Katniss starts to realize how much she needs Peeta things begin to fall apart and he is quick regressing into the tortured Capitol mutt. The Doctors say there is no hope. Katniss convinces Beetee to break into Peeta's medical files and discovers things about Peeta's mother noone knew, especially Peeta. Can this new information be the key to bringing her Peeta back or will it destroy both of them. [submitted by @emazura]

Prompt 125: Peeta Mellark has just started school with a disability (physical, metal, etc.). How will his best friend, Katniss Everdeen, help him through the year and navigate bullies? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 126: The Wedding Year AU. K & P meet and start dating. Early on, they learn that between the both of them they're invited to a lot of weddings (for friends, coworkers, family, whoever), even in the wedding party for some. They decide which ones they'll attend, and these weddings are spread throughout the year. The thing is K has commitment issues and isn't sure if she's even the marrying type, so how does this year of weddings play out for her and P? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 127: AU - Peeta is has two older brothers, a loving but weak father, and an abusive mother. How can the older boys comfort five year old Peeta after his mother’s attacks? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 128: broken katniss post mockingjay - super depressed about everything and the weight of what she went through is finally sinking in with no war to distract her. Peeta comes back and takes care of Katniss - either Peeta Katniss or even Haymitch’s points of view [submitted by @everlark-always]

Prompt 129: AU Inspired by the Greek and Roman mythologies, where the Games take place in an amphitheater/arena turned into a labyrinth. How often do the games occur? Are there mythological beasts/mutts? How do Katniss and Peeta survive? Or do they not? What happens after they leave the arena? [submitted by @katnissdoesnotfollowback]

Prompt 130: Sheep herder Peeta and quiet seamstress Katniss. That’s it. That’s the prompt. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 131: okay well somebody’s gotta do the inevitable Everlark/WandaVision crossover ... but it’s gotta end happy or I’m gonna be very upset [submitted by @rosegardeninwinter]

Prompt 132: Katniss and Peeta are musicians writing songs about one another unbeknownst to the other. Specifically Taylor Swift's cover of Untouchable, Katniss writes about Peeta. Peeta writes Jump then Fall (maybe change it up a little) about Katniss. Please & thank you! [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 133: The victory tour is live-streamed and mandatory viewing for each district. What no one expected however, was for Snow to know Peeta was the words behind Katniss - the one he couldn’t control. When peeta starts talking about rue and thresh in D11, snow issues the command and everyone is shocked when a bang rings out and a red spot starts rapidly spreading on Peeta’s chest. Reactions and the aftermath! [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 134: Katniss and Peeta in an FLR marriage, Peeta is bisexual and so Katniss has a lot of boyfriends like Cinna, Thresh, Gale, Finnick with whom they have sexy times. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 135: Princess Katniss Everdeen was forced to marry King Snow's son Cato, to ensure that the people in her kingdom didn’t die due to famine. Too bad she falls in love with Cato's personal sex slave, Peeta Mellark. But his time in the royal harem and that with the prince has made him too broken to even consider about love. Will Katniss be able to soothe his bettered soul? What happens when the king finds out? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 136: Katniss Everdeen never had a student as unruly as Peeta Mellark. She wants to spank the hell out of him. What happens when he finally submits himself to his hot and sexy bio teacher? [submitted by @everlurked]

Prompt 137: Millionaire Katniss Everdeen is a porn film maker. Too bad she has to hire, watch and edit two of the sexist man on earth Peeta Mellark and Finnick Odair having sex when she finds out that she might be having a huge crush on Peeta. But she thinks that they are in a relationship. Will she take a chance when Peeta tells her that he is bi and actually Finnick and him are friends, comfortable with each other to do such intimate things for money and not so subtly hints that he likes her too? [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 138: Katniss realizes her feelings for Peeta on the train back and is honest with herself and Peeta about how real it was for her - the beginning of a real relationship after the games [submitted by @everlark-always]

Prompt 139: Young Katniss discovers a wolf cub caught in one of her traps while hunting with her father. They bring him home to heal and Katniss falls in love with his gorgeous blue eyes. He joins the family and becomes Katniss’ new hunting partner. As he grows, Katniss discovers the orphaned wolf’s secret. Werewolf!PeetaBonus: Jealous Gale (As friend? Hunting partner? Your choice) [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 140: The west side of the village is surrounded by a vast forest that no one dares to enter. There’s a legend that states anyone who enters will die in the hands of the wolf that can’t turn back into a man. Katniss doesn’t believe this but when she reads a book, the curiosity gets to her and the only one that she could trust is the drunk man of the town. Witness her encounters this cursed being and how everything in this town isn’t what it seems. #werewolves #magic [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 141: Okay. So texting is wonderful, isn’t it? Katniss is thrilled that she can talk to people without actually talking, especially across the room when that one person you want to talk to is in a different conversation/group than you are. (This can just be fluffy, but as an added bonus, maybe it’s also a way for someone to get *flirty* - or more - with their convo, making her blush like crazy, and the people in her group wanna know what’s going on, why are you blushing..... Or even reversed where Peeta ends up blushing at something she sent. Though he would probably just grin and look up at her unabashedly, which she chided him for later because it’s a dead giveaway. OR! Katniss receives an unwanted text/set of texts from someone - named or not idc - and someone like Finnick or Jo, Gale, maybe Prim, or even Peeta - beast mode activated - sees it over her shoulder and loses their shit and starts taking over the conversation in a ridiculous and hilarious way, unbeknownst to the person responding, and to Katniss’ chagrin. Maybe even as a group, and Katniss just cannot get her phone out of their hands. (I feel like Haymitch, Cinna, and Effie would add their hilarious two cents here and there but also I have no idea how that would work. Idk. This is also known as “The prompt for something I want to write but I don’t write sexy because I’m an awkward turtle but I still want to read this”. You know. Thank you in advance to anyone who read this and/or takes it on.) [submitted by @everybirdfellsilent]

Prompt 142: An Eon ago, the powerful seer got sent a prophecy that shook the world where it stood. "The joining of the purest soulmate will bring the gift that will change the world." (Can be changed to sound so much better)Throughout the years, the prophecy has been misconstrued and manipulated to their owe benefit. Is Katniss the child, the prophecy warned or is there more to that? #Magic #Soulmates [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 143: Katniss moves into a new town for her new job when she catches the eye of the VP of the bicker gang. How long can she resist him and can she truly fit into his life? #HotPeeta [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 144: She has a night of fun before the start of the semester. She meets this guy, they hit it off that they sleep together. But when she shows up to her class the next day, she sees the guy again. But he’s her professor and he’s way older than she originally thought. #olderPeeta [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 145: She moves in with her aunt and uncle when her parents dies in a small town. After suffering through trama, Katniss slowly starts to get better with the help of her family (aunt, uncle, cousin) and the Mellark brothers. But when things starts happening to her and the people around her, it’s revealed that she and almost everyone in the towns are apart of the werewolf pack and that one of the Mellark brothers is her mate. #werewolves [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 146: Katniss and Peeta Mellark as the "Biggest Family of District 12!" #allthetoastbabies [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 147: An Everlark fic inspired by e.e. cummings poem I Carry Your Heart [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 148: When a wolf pup runs towards Katniss while in the forest calling her Mama, she doesn't know where they came from and how can she understand them? Is she going crazy? Who's the father? (Its the hot hunk that she meets a day later) #werewolves #toastpups [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 149: An Everlark fic based on the real life story of a kitty becoming best friends with a neighbor (I will post the video link in the comments of the answered ask). Is Peeta depressed? PTSD? Grieving? (Please no divorced/widow/single dad storyline though unless it's like adoption). How does Katniss ultimately bond with Peeta and be a healing light for him in addition to Buttercup? Tension tension tension. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 150: Katniss + Peeta idiots to lovers, modern au best friends secretly pining for one another. Ever the dynamic duo and short on cash, they decide to participate in a couples study. Who's the therapist? (Haymitch?) At what point does the therapist assigned to them realize they aren't even together? And does the therapist realize one or both is in love with the other? Big bonus points for a "It's you. It's always been you." moment. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 151: Pandemic!Everlark. It's their first zoom date and stressed out, overworked Katniss FALLS ASLEEP (maybe they were watching a show together?) Peeta stays on the line and draws her. What happens after Katniss wakes up to a sheepish Peeta with a breathtaking portrait of her? [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 152: Enemies to lovers modern au. Katniss emails her group of new hires the training guide to review before they start on Monday. Monday morning just before she's set to meet with the group of trainees Katniss finds an email from new hire Peeta Mellark, attached is the training guide. Completely edited and rewritten. Lots of fuming in their first meeting and total tit for tat hijinks ensue. Torture us with the rivalry please. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 153: Best friends!Everlark who have always been in love with one another. Katniss is in a pretty serious accident, of course Peeta visits her every single day. He notices that every time he enters the room her heart monitor beeps due to elevated heart rate. He notices and finally mentions to a mutual friend (Madge? Finnick?) how it's sweet that she gets excited to see her friends, said friend rolls eyes and is like uh yeah ok "friend". Peeta's all what? Cue suspicion so next time he visits her he takes it a step further and gives little touches (brushes her hair back, strokes her cheek, grazes her arm? LET IT BURN) to see what happens. Sure enough her HR skyrockets. Tell us all the sweet and suspenseful details :))) [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 154: Soulmate au where your soulmates injuries and scars show up on your body tinted in their favorite color. Katniss through the years as she discovers new marks, pondering what it could possibly be, finally figuring out that her soulmate is being hurt way too regularly and in very specific places. Do her parents figure out Peeta is being abused? How do they find and "rescue" him? Or does Peeta live his whole childhood being abused before turning 18? Does he runaway? How do he and Katniss find their way to one another? [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 155: Just a really sweet meet cute of skateboarder!Peeta wiping out the first time he sees Katniss. Bonus points for her being a skater too.[submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 156: Post MJ: Toastbabys perspective from in the womb throughout pregnancy. Bonus points for post birth moments. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 157: Miscommunication. Katniss texts Peeta that she needs some 🥖. Peeta thinks the breadstick is a euphemism of her asking him for sex. How do things play out? [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 158: CF AU: Peeta gets drunk with Haymitch after the quell announcement. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 159: High school au with popular girl, valedictorian, great at sport and then there is Peeta Mellark shy, awkward, sweet but not so good in academics with a huge crush on Katniss. Will she even look at him when she already has tall, dark and handsome Gale by her side? Typical high school drama ensues. [submitted by @everlurked]

Prompt 160: Katniss witnesses a potential crime in progress and gets in contact with law enforcement. Thanks to her tip, a travesty is adverted. But why did the perpetrator seem to recognize Katniss? And when did the baker’s boy become a head FBI agent? [submitted by @kiinghanalister]

Prompt 161: Katniss is texting back and forth with her older boss (who is hott and recently divorced) about a deadline. She's also bra shopping and taking photos to send to Johanna to get her opinion when she accidentally mixes up the recipients. She notices that she just hit send on the photo to Peeta by mistake (her boobs look amazing by the way, bonus points if it's sunset orange) Mortified she texts "shit, wrong person" What happens the next day at the office. Does Peeta think the pics were for a boyfriend? What's he thinking about during the staff meeting? Will Katniss be able to show her face? [submitted by @nightlock-1989]

Prompt 162: Peeta is actually the Mr. Mellark Mrs. Everdeen left behind to marry her true love when they were 18. They parted on good terms but Peeta just had to get out of town never knowing Mr Everdeens first or last name. 22 years later he returns and falls in love with frequent customer Katniss (who is of age) He brings out the playful side in her and she makes him feel young again. Katniss, who doesn't have a great relationship with her mother, doesn't tell her about the older man she's dating. While running errands, Mrs. Everdeen bumps into Katniss and Peeta, who happen to be engaged in a playful game of grab ass. Shock sets in for everyone. Does Mrs. Everdeen think Katniss is Peetas midlife crisis? Does Katniss' young age begin to nag Peeta? Huge bonus if Katniss freaks out because she realizes Peeta has fucked both her and her mom. [submitted by @nightlock-1989]

Prompt 163: Golden Age of Hollywood AU: Songbird Katniss finds herself signing a contract with The Capitol Productions, a major force in the studio system, after a casting agent hears her singing at a nightclub. Her first project is a musical with a handsome Capitol film star, Peeta Mellark. But while they agree to an engagement as fodder for film promotion, the fine print on their contract never covered the relationship becoming real... [submitted by @thelettersfromnoone]

Prompt 164: Peeta is a handsome prince, fleeing his evil stepmother, who has stolen his rightful crown. Katniss is a skilled tracker, taking bounties to send the money back to her struggling family. Will the well-respected hunter make good on the bounty, or will her heart have a different plan? [submitted by @thelettersfromnoone]

Prompt 165: Peeta gets with another girl after the war, while him and katniss are trying to be friends, thinking katniss doesn’t want him, but instead it only makes her insanely jealous. When she falls ill does Peeta come to her rescue or does he keep his distance to please his new gf [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 166: Peeta moves into a new town. It’s a small town but so lively but things starts getting weird when he starts encountering dead animals on his back porch. Looks like someone found their mate and is trying to empress him. #werewolfKatniss [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 167: He knows where she is at all times. What’s she’s doing and who’s she’s with. But lately she’s been hanging out with that guy for his liking and he needs to teach her and show her that she belongs to him and no one else. Her whole mind, body, and soul. !DarkPeeta #psychological #thriller #angst #mightnothaveanicehappyending [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 168: One thing that sets this community apart from the others is that is a matriarchy. But a lot of surrounding communities want to get in. When it is Katniss’s coming of age ceremony, the prophet tells her that she has the opportunity to choose a first husband from the neighboring community. Katniss was set on Gale but he became the third husband of (whoever you choose). Will she stick to her community’s men or branch out and get new blood? #olderpeeta [submitted by @animekpopxx]

Prompt 169: A Capitolite veiwer perspective on the 74th games, maybe running right up to the first day of the Quell. Do they notice Katniss or Peeta at first, or is it one of the other tributes they like. How do the Starcrossed lovers creep up on them. Maybe reactions to Rues death, or the victory tour ( if you want to go that far) [submitted by @darkhorse-javert]

Prompt 170: Superhero/Catburglar AU: The jewel-thief Mockingjay has evaded The Capitol's superhero, Captain Strong, for long enough, and the Merchants of the city have started putting pressure on the hero to bring the thief in for justice. The only problem? The Captain is the alter-ego of teenager Peeta Mellark, and his elusive nemesis is his high school crush, Katniss Everdeen. [submitted by @thelettersfromnoone]

Prompt 171: IndianaJones!Katniss and JiltedLover!Peeta [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 172: Secret Agent Everlark. Peeta and Katniss are undercover partners on a case in Istanbul (or what have you). They take names and kick ass. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 173: Peeta's POV in THG when he wakes up in the cave after Katniss injects him with the medicine to cure his blood poisoning, finding her in a very scary pool of blood. His perspective until she finally wakes. Canon compliant please. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 174: Victory tour AU/deleted scene, Peeta and Katniss walk along a beach in District 4, in a brief moment where they are alone, and Katniss tells Peeta why her favourite colour is green, and anything else you think would fit nicely into that conversation. Basically just Katniss opening up a little more. Either Peeta or Katniss POV. [submitted by @emilia206]

Prompt 175: Katniss hits the force field in CF instead - Peeta’s reaction [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 176: Peeta absentmindedly calls Katniss “love”. She doesn’t mind. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 177: Canon compliant Peeta's POV in MJ when the bombs go off in front of the president's mansion. [submitted by @lovely-tothe-bone]

Prompt 178: A story based on THIS tweet. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 179: Prompt based on the korean drama “Lovestruck in the City”. Peeta as Jaewon and Katniss as Eunho and the rest is up to you [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 180: Capitol didn’t know hijacking but they left Peeta broken. He was sexually assaulted many times by Capitol buyers, both men and women. Will he be able to recover? How does it affect Katniss and Peeta's dynamic. Also Finnick plays a very important role in Peeta's recovery. [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 181: After her parents death (possibly small pox?), Katniss goes to live with her mothers family. They accept beautiful blonde Prim instantly, but Katniss looks far too much like her Native American father. They sell her as a slave at auction to the Mellark Plantation. Even though she always works to the point of collapse, she is treated terribly by Peeta’s brutal mother. Does he help her keep in contact with Prim? or take care of her when the slave masters beat her? Does Mrs. Mellark sell her again? [submitted by @hope4hea]

Prompt 182: Canon Divergence Katniss gets caught hunting and whipped [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 183: Katniss is really pregnant in CF and forced by Snow to get an abortion [submitted by anonymous]

Prompt 184: Horror-love story. Locals tell legend of “La Dame Mellark” who practiced Dark Arts, caused her family’s ruin, and haunts decrepit, facetiously-named “Mellark Mansion.” What if ghostly figure sometimes spotted in window and unexplained occurrences not her ghost but actually Peeta who survived fireball explosion with physical and emotional scars? Years later, Katniss new in town, either seeks shelter there, maybe looking for her sister’s missing cat? Is Katniss trapped or injured or on the run? Does her singing soothe Peeta when he slips from shy to explosive personality? Does he free her? Do locals storm property looking for her? Is Katniss the delusional crazy dangerous one who repels the attacking horde with explosion, then is soothed by gentle Peeta who promises to care for her because turns out Prim died long ago and Katniss never faced truth? HEA for them, maybe not for townsfolk. [submitted by @567inpanem]

[sisterspooky1013]

Only One Choice, Chapter 12

Read it here on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic

From: fmulder@fbi.gov

Sent: July 15, 1996 9:06am

To: dscully@fbi.gov

Subject: This weekend

Hey,

It was good to run into you yesterday. Your sister seems nice. Is she older or younger? I remember you said you had three siblings; where do you fall in there?

Let me know if you can come by this weekend. Priscilla promises to provide a better beverage selection this time. She was unimpressed with my hosting abilities.

From: dscully@fbi.gov

Sent: July 15, 1996 10:23am

To: fmulder@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:This weekend

Hi,

I was surprised to see you in Georgetown again, what brought you by? Not your drug dealer again, I presume (disclaimer to anyone reading this that it’s a joke). I’m the third of four; Missy is two years older than me. Our oldest brother is Bill and little brother is Charlie. Do you have other siblings, aside from the sister you told me about?

As for this weekend, I’m free in the evening on Saturday. I had the thought, though, that it’s perhaps not appropriate for us to be spending time alone at your apartment. Not that I think you have or would behave inappropriately in any way, just for propriety’s sake. Sorry if that seems old fashioned. Maybe we can get dinner? Send my regrets to Priscilla.

From: fmulder@fbi.gov

Sent: July 15, 1996 4:45pm

To: dscully@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:This weekend

Given the later half of your email, it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to admit that I went by that coffee shop hoping to see you there again. So let’s just say it was indeed to pay a visit to my dealer.

Nope, Samantha was my only sibling. Mom and Dad divorced after she disappeared. It was far from a Hallmark movie, but I turned out okay (I think).

Scully, if you don’t trust yourself around me behind closed doors, all you have to do is say so. Jokes aside, I can respect that. I actually have an idea of something we could do that is very public and not at all inappropriate. Will you trust me if I tell you it’s a surprise?

From: dscully@fbi.gov

Sent: July 16, 1996 9:36am

To: fmulder@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:This weekend

I go by that coffee shop most Sundays, sometimes with my sister or mom, sometimes alone. I’m not sure what your dealer’s typical hours of operation are, but I tend to be there around noon. For future reference.

I’m sorry to hear about your parents. I would say you turned out pretty well, but then again I hardly know you.

I will trust you with a mystery public outing so long as you let me know what to dress for and also if there will be food involved. Something you should know about me; if you don’t feed me I turn into a Gremlin.

From: fmulder@fbi.gov

Sent: July 17, 1996 8:56am

To: dscully@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:This weekend

Hey, sorry I never got back to you yesterday. I won’t bore you with the details, but suffice to say that criminal profilers are not immune to workplace drama.

As luck would have it, my dealer runs a blue light special at 11:30 am on Sundays, so I tend to be in the neighborhood around that time. A stunning coincidence.

I think you know me better than the vast majority of the people I interact with at this point, save for a select few. I’m not sure if that speaks as much to the fact that I like hanging out with you as it does to the fact that I don’t have many friends. My spooky reputation tends to scare people off, but I’m not exactly crying in my cornflakes over it.

I wouldn’t want you to turn into a Gremlin on me, so refreshments will be provided. Wear something you can move in, definitely not a dress or heels (it pains me to say this). Can I pick you up at 5:00?

From: dscully@fbi.gov

Sent: July 17,1996 2:31pm

To: fmulder@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:This weekend

Workplace drama knows no bounds. I’ve been getting the silent treatment from one of the other pathologists because I questioned whether they’d calibrated the scale before weighing internal organs.

I think you’re overestimating how well I know you, Mulder. I know next to nothing about you, outside your interest in the paranormal and a bit about your childhood.

I’m resisting the urge to ask what you have planned. Why don’t we meet somewhere? If you’re taking me UFO sighting...we better see a UFO is all I’m saying.

From: fmulder@fbi.gov

Sent: July 18, 1996 9:10am

To: dscully@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:The weekend

I want to make a comment on the fact that weighing internal organs is part of your job description, but I spent an hour today debating whether someone sticking pencils in their victim’s eyes is some kind of Freudian penis envy thing.

You know more about me than you think, Scully. You know I’m a cat person, and that I have terrible taste in beer. Also that I like Radiohead and am not beneath asking a woman out while she’s trying to do her job. I’ll offer you a bonus fact, or more accurately a confession: I didn’t really need to come down to Quantico last week when we had coffee. I just wanted to get coffee with you. Don’t tell my boss.

Now you have to tell me something about yourself. It’s only fair.

If there were any good places to spot UFOs around here, I’d take you in a heartbeat. If you’re ever up for a road trip out west, let me know. Washington State is a hotbed of UFO activity. Plus they have really good coffee.

Can you meet me at the Hoover building? I’ll drive us from there.

From: dscully@fbi.gov

Sent: July 18, 1996 1:19pm

To: fmulder@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:This weekend

So what was the verdict on the pencil/penis eyeball situation? Fruedian or no?

I’m touched that you’d go so far as insubordination to have coffee with me, however I hope you won’t make a habit of it. Next time you come down here I’ll have to email your boss and ask him if you got permission to come out and play.

Something about me...I like to read a lot. I think I’d say Jane Eyre is my favorite book of all time (not that you asked). I’m also addicted to bubble baths. Actually, reading Jane Eyre IN a bubble bath is pretty much my idea of heaven (ideally with a glass of wine).

I’ve been to Seattle once. Too much rain, though it was very green and pretty. Isn’t that where Bigfoot lives?

I’ll meet you at the Hoover building on Saturday at 5, wearing my very best ball gown and stiletto heels.

From: fmulder@fbi.gov

Sent: July 19, 1996 8:13am

To: dscully@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:This weekend

No verdict will be reached unless and until we catch the guy and have occasion to ask him if he was using his pencils as...pencils. Profiles are all theory, which can be both interesting and frustrating.

I wouldn’t advise you to contact my AD, he’s kind of a dick. I’ll ask him to write a note excusing me from work next time.

Jane Eyre? I wouldn’t have expected that from you. It’s a very romantic book, and entirely centered around two people who never should have worked as a couple coming together despite numerous obstacles. Is that something you’re into?

You get 95 points for knowing that Bigfoot lives in Washington (you lost 5 for calling him Bigfoot; he’s known as Sasquatch out there). My dream vacation is lurking around the forests of the Pacific Northwest, Squatchin’.

It’s a date.

From: dscully@fbi.gov

Sent: July 19, 1996 3:46pm

To: fmulder@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:This weekend

Don’t ruin my favorite book by overanalyzing it, Mulder. If you’d like to trash Wuthering Heights, be my guest. I pledge my allegiance to Charlotte.

Your dream vacation sounds like it might end in death from exposure, or perhaps a good old fashioned bear mauling, but who am I to tell you how to spend your paid leave?

See you tomorrow, at 5. And it’s not a date.

From: fmulder@fbi.gov

Sent: July 19, 1996 6:55pm

To: dscully@fbi.gov

Subject: RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:RE:This weekend

I would always rather be happy than dignified.

(A little Charlotte to arrive to on Monday)

[sweetsassymusic]

The Long Kaz Rant I Told Myself I Wouldn’t Write, But Here We Are

This is probably an unpopular opinion. And I hope it doesn't come across as confrontational or anything because I don't mean it that way. But I've always been super confused by the way Kaz is accepted, basically across the entire fandom, as either morally gray or straight up villainous? He doesn’t really seem like either of those things to me. On a surface level, obviously there are things he’s done that are normally considered evil. He’s stolen, he’s killed, he threatened a child, he gouged out someone’s eye. And that’s all pretty bad, right? But it completely ignores the context given in the books. (More after the cut because this got too long...)

There’s a difference between doing something evil and doing something that’s shocking, “dark,” or difficult to watch.

Before I read the books, I heard fans discuss all the horrible things Kaz does. And the way people talk about him, I was expecting him to be… Feral Kaz – someone who delights in doing horrible things because he’s just so twisted and angry. The author herself even referred to him on her blog as being utterly despicable. Wow! This guy must really go out of his way to hurt innocent people, huh? So when I sat down to actually read it, I was so surprised. Most (if not all?) the killings were done on some level of self-defense. His “murder victims” were actual evil people trying to kill him or someone he loved. And the reason he threatened a child was because the only alternative was killing her – something he would never want to do. You know, because he’s not evil.

I don’t know if I just have very different definitions of these terms than most people? But to me, the idea of Kaz being “utterly despicable” should not even be on the table to begin with (Leigh Bardugo, you good?) and even the idea of him being “morally gray” is questionable.

When I think of a morally good character, I don’t think of someone who never does anything questionable or always perfectly makes the correct choices. I think of someone who is on a mission–either to protect the world, a loved one, or simply pursuing a personal goal–who at least tries to conduct his mission in a way that either does no harm to others, or (when that’s not possible) does as little harm as necessary to get the job done. 

Whereas, when I think of a villainous character, I think of someone who has no regard for others at all. Someone who either relishes in harming the innocent, or pays zero consideration to whether he harms innocents while pursuing his goals (which are usually, in themselves, harmful to innocent people). 

And finally, when I think of a morally gray character, I think of someone directly between these two. Someone who is a little bit evil, a little bit sadistic, but not entirely evil. He’s got a few good points too. Maybe he’s someone who keeps switching sides, unsure if he wants to be a hero or villain. Maybe he has hurt a lot of innocent people unnecessarily, but he joins in with the good guys for personal gain, and people don’t mind him there simply because he doesn’t interfere with the protagonist’s goals. Or maybe he’s the “Bad Cop” to someone else’s Good Cop: someone who uses more violence than is necessary, just for fun, but still helps the good side in some capacity, so everyone chooses to look past it.

Under these definitions, Kaz (to me) seems more like a good character. While pursuing his personal goals, he protects people he loves, and yes, he does do “dark” things. But he doesn’t relish in doing them (despite his reputation in-universe of being a chaotic sadist. His reputation is not accurate; he invented it for his own protection). He does them because he has to. If he can get the job done right without hurting anyone, that’s the route he’ll take. But that option isn’t always available. And he’s not the type to lie down and die just to avoid getting his hands dirty (nor should he, imo). 

Again, maybe I just have a different idea of what constitutes being morally gray. But I always thought it was meant to be a judgment on the choices you make when you actually HAVE a choice? A morally gray character has the choice to be good or evil, and they choose to do both (which one depending on how they feel that day). 

Whereas, if you do something “bad” because circumstances force you to do it–because you or someone you love will die otherwise–that’s pretty much the same as having a gun to your head. You’re not morally gray. You’re doing it under duress. It’s survival, not a reflection of where you stand on moral topics. Like, if you trap a vegan in a room with only a piece of meat, and you leave them there for days, weeks, that person doesn’t suddenly become a “fake vegan” if they eat that meat to avoid literally starving to death. You forced them to do it. When it comes to their moral beliefs, they would still be a vegan if they had the freedom to make that choice. You just put them in a situation where those choices aren’t available to them. Your lack of freedom in a situation shouldn’t define you.

The same can be said for placing a starving, homeless orphan boy alone in the dog-eat-dog world of Ketterdam. The option of being a sweet little law-abiding citizen is not available to him. So is it really fair to define him by something in which he had no choice?

I’ve come across so many GrishaVerse fans who, while sipping on their Starbucks in the comfort of their own home, go “Ugh, Kaz. He’s so DARK, so EVIL!” (Fun fact: while my mom was watching the show, she said Kaz is evil because “he seems to always have a plan.” Oh no! Not PLANS!)  “He must be some kind of monster to be able to do the things he does and still live with himself! I could NEVER do those things!” Well…you’ve never actually had to do those things? Your life has never depended on it? Idk, to me, it’s just a very privileged take. And I’m not trying to make this into a big social issue. It’s not like criticism against a fictional character is anywhere near the same level of importance as the issues marginalized people are facing in real life. I’m just saying, it’s very easy to condemn activity you’ve never been forced to engage in for your own survival.

One of the biggest reasons people have given me for why they think Kaz is evil is that he is “for himself.” Even the author said she thinks Kaz is worse than the Darkling (who, I’ve gotten the impression, she believes to be irredeemable) because the Darkling has communal goals (he wants to bring positive change for other people/the world at large) while Kaz’s goals are just personal (he wants to bring positive change for himself and only himself). And for one? It just isn’t true: many (if not most) of the things Kaz does is either for his Crows or for his late brother; he just disguises it with supposed self-interest for the sake of his reputation. And second? It’s…not actually wrong to have personal goals or to act in self-interest. Bettering your own life is a valid desire. It’s not the same as being selfish. Not everything you do has to be for other people.

(And, tbh, this is something Leigh Bardugo seems to have a problem with in general, not just in this scenario. I could write a whole separate rant about other characters that were demonized in-narrative for engaging in “too much” self-care, and how her unforgivingly black and white morality ruined the Shadow and Bone trilogy for me. Worst of all, she even seemed to imply recently that the only reason real-life antisemitism is wrong is because “the Jews didn’t fight back”? [Like, if they had met her criteria of “fighting back”, would that make antisemitism somewhat justified to her? What? Idek, but she should really clarify.] Basically, she seems to take “non-selfishness” to an extreme. I don’t know her personally, I don’t want to make assumptions, I don’t have anything personal against her, and I’m not trying to get her cancelled or anything, I promise. But please, when you read her books, please don’t accept all her ideas at face value, because there’s some Weird Shit™ in there sometimes.)

Anyway, another reason people say Kaz is bad or morally gray is that he wants revenge. “Revenge is a bad coping mechanism! You should want JUSTICE! Not REVENGE!” And again, this argument is wild to me. I mean, yes, there are situations–especially in real life, modern, western contexts–where revenge is a bad coping mechanism someone has developed, and transforming their anger into a desire for justice is a way for them to overcome that and express their anger in a healthier way. But that’s a very specific scenario. When we’re talking generally, the line between revenge and justice is a lot thinner than people think (and in some scenarios, there is no line at all). 

For example, real life victims and their families often say they can’t wait to see the perpetrator rot in prison, even wishing (sometimes even fantasizing) that the guy gets abused in prison by fellow inmates. For them, justice and revenge are wrapped up together in one big court-issued sentence. And while some people find that disturbing or take issue with it, it’s…generally considered valid outrage? This guy is evil and hurt them, so it’s okay for these people to want him to suffer. And most importantly, these people called the cops instead of taking matters into their own hands, therefore they’re Good, right? They’re good citizens who obey and rely on the established authority, therefore they are handling their anger in an Acceptable™ way?

But in the world of Ketterdam, if someone has victimized you, or is trying to kill you or someone you love, you can’t just call the fucking cops (and let’s be honest, looking at irl cops, it’s a questionable idea here too sometimes). If we’re analyzing Kaz’s outrage and how he handles it, we have to analyze it in the context of where he lives, not where we live. We have options in our lives that Kaz doesn’t have. So we have to ask, what are the most productive steps he could realistically take in his world?

I see activists and bloggers on websites like this, publicly fantasizing about gouging the eyes out of certain politicians and right-wing figureheads. And they would probably do it for real if they could. On Tumblr and Twitter, this is generally considered righteous anger. The politicians are evil, so it’s okay to hurt them, right? That’s how the logic goes, anyway (I know some will disagree, but it’s a common take here). Well, imagine if, instead of just being a bigot, one of these evil people personally stabbed–possibly killed–your girlfriend. And there were no cops to call, no news stations or social media to turn to, to show people what this guy did. No authority or community on your side. No way to ensure this guy faced consequences for his actions. There’s just you, your dying girlfriend, your helplessness, your anger. What would be the appropriate way to handle this situation, so you were acting out of justice instead of revenge? What does “justice” even mean in a world like that? It’s a world where either you hurt others or you lie down and just let others keep hurting those you love (which, in itself, would be evil). I can’t think of any “appropriate” response Kaz could take. Which, for better or worse, is probably why he just went for the eye. You probably would too in that context. Are you morally gray? I doubt it.

It’s really weird to me how people seem to hold Kaz to this high standard of absolute Moral Purity, but they don’t hold other characters to it. Like, was the dad on Taken being “feral” or “morally gray” when he told his daughter’s kidnapper that “I will find you and I will kill you” and then pursued him with fury? His motivations were personal and not communal. He was coming from a place of revenge, just as much as justice. But most people consider him a hero. He’s not controversial or “dark.” There are plenty of other heroes who do terrible things (sometimes to innocent people! Even when it’s not even necessary!) for the “greater good” or just because it’s convenient. People call them a “badass” and then turn around and say Kaz is just “bad.” Idk, it just seems really arbitrary the way people draw these lines.

If we’re expanding the definition of “morally gray” to include anyone who’s ever done anything questionable, made a mistake, been forced to do something they wouldn’t normally do, done something for personal reasons instead of for the world at large, or wanted revenge for something, then there literally are no heroes in fiction (except maybe a few cardboard cutouts) or in real life.

(Ironically, the most morally gray thing Kaz does, imo, is something most people don’t even have a problem with: the fact he runs a gambling house to “take money from pigeons.” And even that is really mild [no one is forcing the “pigeons” to gamble their money away]. But yeah, that’s one of the few instances I could think of where he actually hurt innocent people unnecessarily. That and the time, as a kid, where he stole candy from that other kid...and even that might be mostly-but-not-entirely excused by the fact he was starving to death. But yeah.)

[ampleappleamble]

—

Axa could feel them watching her as they settled into their room at the Goose and Fox that night, could feel them wanting to know her. Not only so they could understand why she had done what she had with Purnisc and Kaenra, but also so they could (no doubt) uncover and examine all the painful, humiliating life experiences behind her every decision, all her successes and failures, and then judge her accordingly. Like kith will, she thought, of course. That’s normal and healthy to think.

Genuine concern mingled with morbid curiosity, hung palpably over the group like a scythe posed to reap as everyone sat in awkward silence and waited for Axa to break the silence. So she drained her goblet, got out her pipe and her whiteleaf, and with a grim sense of determination, she told them about it.

About the career she'd built back in Ixamitl, where she had lucked into a scholarship to one of her hometown's more prestigious lore colleges, bestowed on her by a generous politician acquainted with her father. Because she'd always loved to learn and hear stories about kith from around the world, she had chosen to put her good fortune to good use and study to become a naturalist, concerning herself with the cultures and languages and histories that constituted the kith population of Eora.

While most of her colleagues had decided to specialize in Vailian– a popular choice for the political or business-oriented crowd– Axa fancied herself an intellectual, and so she had challenged herself with mastering Ordhjóma: the exotic, mysterious language of the Glamfellen, separated for 10,000 years from their tropical Sceltrfolc cousins in the far-flung, frozen south, in The White that Wends. She had thrown herself into her studies, blowing through massive tomes and ancient scrolls like a hurricane, outperforming her peers with ease. Within four years, Axa had risen like a Dawnstar to the top of her class.

And then the field work had begun.

"It's one thing to read about a people, learn their language from books and study up on their culture," Axa explained, stuffing her pipe slowly, taking her time. "It's quite another to visit their homeland, speak with them, live among them. I was barely seventeen, I'd never even been out of the city..."

Kana winced, painful recognition in his black eyes. "Culture shock can be particularly difficult for younger scholars. We have certain expectations after all our years of academic study, and to find out that the genuine article doesn't quite measure up after all that work can feel disorienting and disappointing. There's not only the shock, there's anger at the natives, and then the guilt over said anger..."

Axa accepted Aloth's proffered light while Kana trailed off– it always delighted her, using arcane flame for something so trivial as a smoke– and sighed. "That's what was really odd about it. I did experience some culture shock, but ultimately the problem wasn't me. It was them. I know it sounds like I'm just being bitter, but... honestly, for whatever reason, the whole village really was actively freezing me out."

"Nice," Edér chuckled, grinning at the unintentional pun until Aloth's glare chastised him back into solemnity.

"No one wanted to talk to me," Axa continued. "Oh, I tried, incessantly, but they just... kept turning away, or answering with nonsense or... or riddles. My colleagues had little difficulty integrating, but I felt like I was just barely tolerated by the villagers. I tried asking the other students about it, but they either feigned ignorance really well or they honestly couldn't tell what these Glamfellen had against me."

"Some sort of... racial prejudice, perhaps?" Aloth looked as uncomfortable as he sounded, but at least the topic was finally broached. Axa shrugged.

"I don't think so, but I honestly have no idea. The other three scholars with me weren't orlans, but they weren't Glamfellen either. And no one ever specifically said anything about my being an orlan."

Sagani nodded. "In my experience, while most Glamfellen tend to be as standoffish as any elf– no offense, Aloth– they don't usually have specific prejudices like that."

"Right? Ordinarily, unity and hospitality are taken very seriously in the frozen south; to support one another is indispensable to survival. Nevertheless, I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong by them, and it was driving me out of my gods damned mind. I was supposed to be studying local accents, dialects, and colloquialisms, but that's somewhat difficult when nobody will actually speak with you. So I ended up spending a lot of time eavesdropping on people, mostly outside, by myself."

Sagani shook her head, drawing her whetstone across her hunting knife. "Bad idea to go it alone out there in the White. All kinds of dangers hiding in the snow."

The orlan barked a sharp, sardonic laugh. "You're telling me. That's how I met Vaargys."

As soon as his name was out of her mouth, Axa could feel her entire demeanor transform, and the atmosphere in the room with her. It was the first time she'd said his name since she'd left home, and even though she knew they'd already been listening, her little audience really seemed to be listening now. She felt her face get warm and her eyes sting from the impending tears, so she turned to the window, trying hard to focus on the streets outside and not at her own reflection in the glass.

Come on, girl. You’ve run far enough. It's time you faced this.

"I spotted him from afar one day at dusk: a dark, distant, shaggy figure out there among the rocks, shambling around just beyond the village's borders. It took me a few minutes to even realize he was kith. My colleagues noticed me watching him eventually, warned me away from him: the 'wild man' the locals called the 'Cursed Vagabond,' the 'Exiled Priest.' And he was out there all alone, struggling to survive because nobody wanted him around, and no one could say why..."

"You had a lot in common," Aloth murmured gravely. It wasn't difficult to see where this story was going. And he couldn't help but think it sounded similar, thematically, to one he knew quite well.

"And kith will paint a face on a rock with their own blood if it means they can have someone to talk to," Sagani sighed sadly, sympathy heavy in her chest. She could see where this was going too, and she dug her fingers into the thick fur on the back of Itumaak's neck for comfort. He grunted in appreciation.

"So I introduced myself, like you do. He was... cautious, but receptive. It helped that I'd brought gifts." Axa exhaled, and blue smoke curled up before her, walling her off. "We got to know one another, and over time we became fond of each other. We started sharing meals and stories about ourselves, our lives. He told me he was a priest of Wael, self-taught, and exiled from his clan for venerating the Eyeless Face instead of the Beast of Winter... He let me get close to him, cut his hair, tend to his wounds..." The tears spilled over at last, and she paused for a moment, hid her face.

"And you fell in love," Sagani finished for her. Classic. Tale as old as time.

Axa smiled again even as she brushed her tears away, dragging her little fist across her golden brown cheeks. "And I fell hard. I was his first real friend, gave him his first kiss. And very soon, I became his first lover." This made the men blush and look away. Axa and Sagani paid them no heed.

"I was fascinated by him, and he adored me. We made our own little world together there in the caves, in the snow. And we lived there, separate from everyone and everything else. Until I had to return to Ixamitl, of course. But I had a plan: Before I could talk myself out of it, I asked him to marry me– the very night before I was to return to the Eastern Reach. ...Gods, I had known him for only five months."

"And... wait, how old were you?" Edér spoke up for the first time since Axa had started her story, confusion clear on his face.

"I– Seventeen, almost eighteen by the time I went back home," she clarified, miffed at the interruption. "I'm twenty-two, now."

The blond man held his hands out in front of him, squinting at his fingers, baffled. "And... and how old were you when you left home? Hey, how old was he?"

Kana sighed and leaned over, patting him on the shoulder with one huge hand and confiscating the man's pipe with the other. "Erh– Never mind that now, my friend. Please, Axa, continue." He smiled that big, toothy smile at the little woman, and she blinked very slowly.

"...I brought him home to meet my family and colleagues, to assist me in my studies since all I'd really brought back from the Land was him, and ultimately, hopefully, to become my husband. In the interest of brevity– albeit somewhat belated– here’s how all that turned out: my family and colleagues hated and distrusted him, and after I had defended him so fiercely I'd alienated myself from most of my peers, I found out that about three-quarters of everything he'd ever told me about his home and his language was complete horseshit and all of our work together was complete bunkum. So! I burned it all in a big bonfire behind our house before telling him to leave and never come back." She ticked her misfortunes off on her fingers as she described them, her hands trembling, and then gesticulated fiercely before letting her fists fall to the small tabletop before her. "And then... I left, too. And now, here I am."

...Gods, that was easy. Much easier than I thought it'd be. Why was it so–

She rambled on before she could lose her nerve. "So. That's why I... wanted to do that for Kaenra. My fiancé lied to me and fucked up my life, too, and I can't just ignore that kind of shit when I see it anymore." She sighed, turning to the window again with her pipe still burning away in her hand. "Vaargys is the reason I had to leave my home and everything I've ever known, because his lies ruined my career and my academic standing and my reputation. How could I just stand by and watch as it happened to someone else?"

"Yet, you advised Kaenra to forgive Purnisc?" Aloth twisted his fingers together in his lap, staring at them rather than looking at Axa as he spoke. "After... all he'd done?"

Sagani glanced at him, narrowing her eyes as he reached up to smooth his hair– and wipe away a stray bead of sweat in the process. Is it my imagination, or is he...?

Axa kept her gaze fixed on the street below. "Yeah, that sort of surprised me too, to be honest." She spotted a stray soul, its violet wisps of essence drifting slowly amongst the city goers, and she squeezed her eyes shut, felt them burn behind her eyelids. "I suppose... I just got the feeling that it wasn't too late for them, that what they had for each other wasn't so broken it couldn't be repaired. Vaargys and me... not so. There was no coming back from what he'd done, and we both knew it."

"Whatever became of him? Of Vaargys?" Kana leaned forward eagerly, his eyes shining with compassion. For once, he actually wasn't taking notes on the conversation, and Sagani noticed that, too.

Axa opened her eyes, and saw the lost soul on the street no more. She shuddered. "After I confronted him, Vaargys simply... left. Vanished into the horizon, just as abruptly as he'd first appeared to me. And then, I got to clean up after him– after us– all alone. I wasn't up to the task; wasn't really up to the task of anything but hiding in bed and regretting my entire life. I could really only scrape together the wherewithal every now and then to go out and sell off or give away all the ridiculous trinkets and baubles we'd accumulated together. A few of the things I tried to get rid of turned out to be stolen, of course– big surprise, Axa, he's a thief and a liar– which did my already brutalized image no favors. Nor my purse, when I was obliged to pay out of my pocket for his chicanery."

"Villain," Kana spat, shaking his head slowly. "Scoundrel! ...Oh, how dastardly, to sow discord between the woman he loves and her neighbors and colleagues, then to abscond, completely free of reproach!" His sorrowful frown was as huge and expressive as his smiles always were, almost theatrically so.

Sagani just barely looked over in time to spot Aloth surreptitiously roll his eyes, and she couldn't suppress her grin. I thought so. Ondra's Lure, they're pretty obvious now that I think of it...

The elf cleared his throat and took the reins. "Shall we assume, then, that your family and friends were unable or unwilling to aid you in your time of need?"

Axa scoffed. "My little brother was sympathetic, but ultimately powerless to help me. He's stuck too far under our mother's thumb. He's a Godlike, and it's made things... difficult, for both of them. He feels obligated to her. As for our mother, she blamed me for my own misfortunes, for 'shacking up' with a man like Vaargys in the first place. So... that sort of says it all about our relationship. My father hasn't been in the picture since I was 13, and any non-academic friends I hadn't already traded for school, I ended up trading for Vaargys. I'd made him my whole world, and he–" She stopped herself, puffed on her pipe. "I don't... really make new friends easily. Never have."

Kana laughed good-naturedly. "With all due respect, present company seems to indicate quite the contrary."

"Ha! Since becoming a Watcher with her own castle who offers to help everyone she meets solve all their problems, I do seem to be quite popular, yes," the orlan agreed with a wry smirk. "...I jest, of course. In any case, the friends I do make, I tend to keep. And cherish." She smiled at Kana earnestly, and now he averted his eyes and went ruddy in the face.

Sagani and Aloth surprised one another, simultaneously faking coughing fits to cover their derisive snorts. Kana went even redder, but still managed a sheepish smile as Axa quickly redirected back to the topic at hand.

"In any case, it was my mother who gave me the idea to relocate to the Dyrwood. She brought back the notice advertising the caravan from the marketplace, threw it at me as I lay in my little nest of quilts and despair, and told me I had better either try and do something to rebuild my life or I may as well just return my soul to the Wheel to start a new one, save it some time and trouble."

"So... in response to your fiancé sabotaging your career and your reputation in your own home community, your own mother told you to... choose between self-exile and suicide?" Aloth spoke very quietly, very carefully. When Axa nodded and shrugged, puffing nonchalantly on her pipe, he couldn't quite come up with anything to say to that.

"As harsh as it sounds," she pressed on as she rose and crossed the room to stand before the hearth, "I agreed with her. I still do. Mama grew up a slave and only finally earned her freedom by running away, so maybe she's biased, but... I was never going to be able to move on like that, lying around like I was dead already, surrounded by bad memories. I had to do something, get up and get out. And wouldn’t it be my luck, she dropped a nice, pre-packaged escape plan in my lap, just like that. Nicest thing she'd done for me in a good long while. ...So. That's what lead me to the Dyrwood."

"And then it lead you to the bîaŵac, the Engwithan ruins, the machine," Kana murmured, rubbing his chin and studying the little woman. "Perchance, did you ever pray to Wael that you might live an interesting life? Because if so, you've had your wish granted many times over!"

"It's funny," Axa sighed as she bent and tapped her pipe against the bricks of the fireplace, "you'd think I'd hold a grudge against Wael, allowing Their priest to make a fool of me like that. But in the end, I had to admit that although he betrayed my trust and wrecked my life, Vaargys hadn't actually ever violated any of Wael's tenets. ...Made me rethink the gods, a bit. Maybe he was a true servant of Wael after all, sent to guide me here for some reason. And I do still pray to Wael for guidance, on occasion."

The aumaua sat up in his chair, beaming. "Ah! Shall we go to the Hall of Revealed Mysteries tomorrow after all, then? We can ask the scriveners' opinion!"

"Gods! I spill my guts to you, and you're still thinking about going to the library?" Axa shook her head and chuckled. "You're a mystery, Kana."

"Wait, so... you were gonna marry a pale elf?" Edér mumbled into his pillow, half asleep and trying to kick his boots off. "But you're an orlan. Would that... how would that work?"

The little woman threw the sheets back on her bed, using a little more force than she'd meant to. "Another mystery, Edér," she snapped, rolling her eyes. "Mysteries abound."

The other two men winced as Sagani laid a gentle, steady hand on the orlan's shoulder. "Hey. ...Hel of a day for all of us. Let's call it a night, yeah?"

So they did.

—

[fuwafuwamedb]

Cursed G Pt 16 (Gilgamesh, Hakuno)

Previous Part: One - HakuPOV / GilPOV, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15

_____

“Well?”

“I’m cooking.”

The man returned from his trip to the bathroom to lean over her shoulder, glancing at the soup in the pot and wrinkling his nose. And, just like that, the peaceful mood was being broken.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he countered. “I merely thought that you would serve a king something worthy of being eaten. I suppose your meager meals will have to continue. I will simply await taking you to Uruk and introducing you to meals that will satisfy a stomach.”

“I think you’ll be fine.”

He still whined, all the way up until she had the food in bowls and the two of them were once more wrapped in blankets in the living room. Try as she might, she still ended up pressed against his chest once again when they were done eating. Her eyes were closing slowly on the view of the mindless television.

She woke up what seemed like moments later.

Birds chirped from outside the window. She could see the sun on the horizon once again.

A pair of arms were around her waist, her body pressed into the mattress as Gilgamesh lay nestled in her chest. His hair had drifted over his eyes a bit as he lay there with his mouth open, giving the subtlest of snores.

His weight was a bit more than she was accustomed to in bed, but it felt nice. It felt very nice.

Her lips met his forehead softly before she glanced at the clock.

Sunday afternoon…

Of course it was Sunday afternoon. She’d fallen asleep for a bit.

Her eyes closed once more, her body shifting a little in bed only to be yanked back under the man close by. When he pulled her in, she wrapped her arms around him. She pressed herself as much against him as he did her.

Those red eyes were opening, his face moving closer to hers once again.

How many times had they done this, she wondered quietly, feeling his lips press to hers. His mouth moved slowly, as did those hands on her chest.

“You slept all day again,” he murmured.

She hummed a bit.

Hard not to; she was content in her mind right now. The bed was comfortable. She had nothing happening, nothing stopping her. There was a pair of lips moving nicely against her own.

“Hakuno,” the man over her breathed.

His hand was moving between them, finding her legs and parting them.

Rather than thinking, she simply wrapped her legs around the man’s waist and listened to him chuckle. His body was moving to loom over her. She could feel a hand stroking gently, making her give the softest of moans...

And then the door was thrown open.

“HAKUNO!”

She screamed.

Gil yanked the blankets over them.

There was more shrieking as the woman in the doorway threw the door closed.

“SHE’S HAVING- GEEZ! AND WE CAME ALL THIS DAMN WAY!”

Someone was laughing in the distance. There was rumbling, something broke in the other room as another person was whistling.

“Who the hell was that?!”

Gilgamesh glared at the door, holing her to himself.

There was no need for questions like that though.There was only one woman who would be bitchy enough to complain after barging into someone’s room like that. Only one, currently dating Cu, somebody would dare to be that arrogant about entering another’s room that loudly.

It was obvious.

“Gil…” Hakuno glanced up at the man, finding him still hovering over her. “Gil, I have to-“

“Go.”

He didn’t even try to argue. She slipped from his arms, grabbing one of his shirts on the nightstand and slipping through the door.

Rin and Cu Chulainn were already in the midst of bickering as Rani and Sakura stood nearby. Cu was in the midst of pointing out about entering rooms and Rin was lamenting naked people being naked. From the sidelines, two women watched as the couple got after one another, both sighing.

“I knew we should have simply called out,” Rani argued.

“We didn’t know if she was here,” Sakura pointed out.

“What are you all even doing here?” Hakuno asked.

Rani and Sakura glanced over at her, both of them wincing a bit.

“I got worried,” Sakura explained. “I wanted to invite you out to eat, but we called a few times and you kept going to voicemail. Emiya said your boyfriend- ah, I mean- your fiance, is a bit rude so we got concerned and borrowed Emiya’s key.”

Sakura glanced around as she said that, frowning more. “Where’s G?”

“Dozing in my room,” Hakuno pointed out. “Cu! Rin! Guys! I’m not doing anything!”

Rin huffed, turning her attention over to her.

The others glanced over at her as well.

No.

They were all looking behind her right now. Their eyes were on the man who was no doubt standing just behind her person.

“Everyone seems to have been able to enter your home without permission,” the man purred, eyeing the lot of them. “I don’t seem to recall an open invitation being given.”

“Rin was worried about Hakuno,” Cu explained. “Sakura snagged the house key from Emiya.”

“And you didn’t inform them that I was here?”

Gilgamesh made it sound like he was some great comfort and protection.

Hakuno glanced over her shoulder at him, watching that almost bored expression that was currently making Cu Chulainn falter a bit.

“Have you tried stopping Hakuno before?”

The man smirked. “Typically, I have found Hakuno enjoys not stopping... It’s one of our many mutual interests.”

No, she didn’t need to hear this. The man was ruining her reputation for sure. Already she could see Sakura looking her over with great interest. The other two girls in the room were trying to find words and failing miserably.

“Alright,” Cu moved between them all, slapping a hand onto Gil’s shoulder. “Everyone, this is Gilgamesh. He’s kind of a dick, but he’s alright with Hakuno and he did me a favor in terms of work so… I mean, he’s still kind of an ass.”

“Excuse me?”

“Anyway!” Cu grinned. “Since we’re all awake and active, let’s head out to eat or something.”

“I need to go say hello to G first!” Sakura glanced down the hall, earning a laugh from Gil.

“You’re going to say hi to that cat?”

“Of course!”

Of course, she was. Sakura loved her beloved cat almost as much as she had. The girl had made a few efforts to try to get close to him. She’d doted on him and given him treats. She’d tried cuddling him and holding him.

At the time, she hadn’t bothered to worry about it.

Now though…

“G has been nestled in the bed I got him,” Gilgamesh told her simply. “Hakuno and I had a time getting him to sleep since he doesn’t seem to be feeling well.”

“He isn’t?”

The king wrapped his arms around her as he spoke to Sakura, keeping her close. “Hakuno and I have been up all night, tending to him. He’s been whining a great deal.”

“Is he going to be okay?”

Sakura looked to the others, earning shrugs.

Any comments they could make were stopped the moment that Gilgamesh wrapped his arms around her more and nipped at her person. She could feel her face warming as the others coughed uncomfortably. 

There was really no way to make him stop at this time.

“I’ve been staying with Hakuno since she has decided to become my wife. Seeing her through the illness of her pet is nothing,” Gilgamesh purred.

“He’s that bad?”

“Vomited a few times on the floor. The medic said little.”

The others in the room shifted.

It was hard not to. Apparently, she was engaged, her cat had become sick, she was performing foreplay in her bedroom; things were as far from okay as possible.

Sakura was the first to move forward, beaming at Gilgamesh.

“I’m glad that you’re here for Hakuno. I got worried when she stopped talking to us as much. She’s seemed a bit down. Please take good care of her.”

The purple haired girl turned to the others.

“If Hakuno’s fine, then we should let her and Gilgamesh have their time together. I think Emiya will probably be mad that I stole his key. Maybe… Rin, could you help me make something-“

“Yeah, come on.”

Rin took her former sister’s hand, glancing over as they headed for the door.

“We’ll see you both tomorrow. Don’t forget to do your homework, Hakuno.”

Her homework…

SHIT!

But Cu was laughing and following after Rin, teasing her about something. Rani shrugged following along.

“Guys!”

The door shut.

Alone again with her no longer feline friend, Hakuno found herself without the assignment help. Her companion headed to the fridge, opening it and pulling out a beer bottle.

“They’re gullible.”

“They’re trusting.”

Not that the man would know anything about trusting. The goddess of his kingdom had turned him into a cat and had tossed him outside of his time. He was without a home or anything other than-

Hakuno groaned at her gleaming living room decorations.

There would be a lot of questions about this.

Thankfully, Gilgamesh was apparently enough of a distraction that the whole group had completely missed taking a look into her living room. None of them had even thought to ask about her sudden influx of gold and jewels. 

Still, there was so much crap to do.

“What time is it?” Hakuno sighed.

“It is time for you to come back to bed.”

“I have to get that homework done, Gil.”

Lots of work. She was pretty sure she had forgone most of her work in lieu of having that one night with Gilgamesh. Then there was the surprise of yesterday and then today was just resting...

“Are your classes about my story still?”

“A couple,” she told him distractedly.

“Then you have your work done. Present me to your people and we shall discuss their heinous crimes against the tales around myself and my friend. Your tutors will learn soon enough what truths of myself and my people that they have found elusive thus far. We can broaden their understanding of the reality of my life and ensure proper teaching to the other noble children whom attend your teachings with you.”

Oh, she could see it now. Taking the great king of Uruk to class...

But she wasn’t going to think about that.

No, she closed her eyes and turned, walking back into his arms.

Perhaps just remaining close to him was enough. Maybe she could just keep him from saying anything. They could simply go back to watching television for a bit before she worked on her homework. The two of them could figure out how to introduce him to people and react to others without being a bit… guarded.

“Hakuno-“

“I can’t take you to school or work with me.”

The man laughed, brushing back her hair and looking into her face. “It’s highly amusing, Hakuno, you seem to think you have a choice in this matter. The fact is, I won’t allow you to leave my sight. Not for long, anyway. I claimed you before your people.”

“You did.”

The man snorted, “a man does not propose himself to a maiden only to be turned down. This is not one of those times where you can simply claim away my claims. You are mine at this point, maiden. In body and in mind.”

“I’m not-“

“Have you read about Sumerian marriages?”

She didn’t breathe a damn word.

Marriages were simple. One basically talked to the family or close guardians, gained permission or approval in general, and then would announce they were husband and wife. There was ceremonial perfume followed by…

Well, followed by…

Hakuno felt her face burning at the thought. Sakura and Cu had both accepted Gilgamesh now. They were both approving of this wedding.

“Have you?” He smirked, coming in closer and beginning to unbutton his shirt on her person. She could already tell he was thinking this conversation over.

“I read about your other wives,” she pointed out.

“Oh?”

Oh indeed. She wasn’t going to sacrifice herself for anything like that. She had tasks to complete here. She had friends and-

“You want something with more meaning?”

Wife to a king was the highest one went. What on earth was the-

“I have one position that is available. Should you be able to return us to Uruk, I would be vaguely interested in making you something more.”

His lips pressed against her own again.

“I will return you to Uruk.”

“Us.” Gilgamesh lifted her up, carrying her back to the bedroom. “You and I will return to my kingdom and you will meet Enkidu.”

Hakuno groaned again, going to speak when the door was pounded on.

Had Sakura forgotten something again?

This wouldn’t be the first time the girl had forgotten her keys, her phone, her shoes, her jacket- something of hers, at the house. Hakuno had to button back up the shirt she was wearing as Gilgamesh made a noise of complaint. 

They looked to one another before Hakuno found herself back on her feet.

She rushed to the door, laughing.

“Did you guys forget something?” she asked, pulling the door open. “I didn’t see…anything…”

There was a supermodel on the other side of the door.

No, Rin?

No… The red eyes were definitely not Rin’s. 

The gaudy, almost see through dress and the red lipstick was also a couple things that Rin would never have approved for herself. The woman before her was screaming of sexual misconduct and depravity.

Hakuno stared at her for a full minute, frowning.

Who on earth…

“Can I… help you?” she asked the woman.

The woman glanced over at her, running her eyes over her person. She could almost see the judgement; the eye twitch, the fixed gaze on her state of dress.

“My name is Ishtar. I’m looking for my lost ah… nephew. His name is Gilgamesh.”

Shit.

Without thinking, Hakuno simply slammed the door shut.

[5tornhomos]

Always Your Advocate - Chapter 1

A/N: This is the first chapter of a fic that I’ve been working on. I’ve also posted it on Wattpad and AO3. It’s been a little while since I’ve written something like this, but it feels great to get back into writing. Huge thanks to @harryeatmyass​, who’s been helping with proofreading and giving me feedback. Please let me know your thoughts! Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Story Summary:  After five years of being in one of the most successful boy bands in the world, Harry Styles is about to embark on his solo career. While at Columbia, he meets Bethany Russo, who’s just been assigned to work with him.  As much as she wants to remain professional, she just can’t keep away from him.

Word Count: 2.9k

Bethany Russo had been working at Columbia Records in New York City for almost 8 years. She had started as an intern when she was 18 years old. Once she graduated from college, at the top of her class, she was officially hired for a full-time position. When she started working at Columbia, she started at the bottom, like any other intern. She didn’t get the chance to work with the major artists right away. Usually, the more seasoned employees got to work with the bigger names.

Beth had a degree in music management, with a minor in the operations. Her main role at Columbia was to figure out the best way to promote the artist. This could be anything from scheduling billboards in Times Square, to setting up TV and radio interviews. She also helped to plan tour dates and produce music videos.

Beth was the type of person that you could always rely on. She always submitted things on time. She was never late, or even on time because she was always early. She was also extremely diligent and thorough, which is what made her so good at her job. She was a planner. She had to be extremely well organized, especially when dealing with artists and their hectic schedules.

Beth always felt pressure to be on time, or to be so diligent. She always felt like she had to work as hard as she possibly could. She never wanted to let people down, and she always wanted to exceed people’s expectations. That’s just how she’s always been. She was always trying to please people.

The longer that Beth worked at Columbia, she slowly started moving up in the company. She proved that she was valuable to the company, especially when helping to plan and execute promotional activities. She slowly got to work on more important tasks and work with some bigger artists. She was becoming a more trusted member of the Columbia team. But the biggest opportunity in her career came when the CEO of Columbia, Ron Perry, asked her directly to work with one of their upcoming clients. She had worked closely with Ron over the last few years, but she knew that getting called into his office was a big deal.

“I just wanted to start by telling you how much I appreciate all the hard work you’ve been doing. I want you to know that I’ve noticed, and I think you deserve to be rewarded,” Ron told her.

“Well, thank you for noticing. What kind of reward did you have in mind?” she asked.

“I think you’re ready to start working with one of our top artists. Well, technically he’s not a top artist yet, because he hasn’t put out his first album yet. But he’s already got a massive and passionate fanbase behind him. He’s already started working on the album, so we’re ready to start planning for the promotion. And I want you to take the lead,” Ron explained.

“That sounds great. But who’s the artist?” Beth asked.

“How do you feel about working for Mr. Harry Styles?”

When she heard that name, Beth was immediately filled with a mixture of excitement and nervousness. When Ron told her that she would be working with a major artist, she didn’t think he meant someone like that. Beth knew that Columbia had signed Harry, but she didn’t realize that she would be working for him, let alone that she would be taking the lead. She knew that Columbia expected big things from Harry. Everyone hoped that he would be the star of the group. They were hoping that he would be the next Justin Timberlake. An artist like Harry was way beyond anything she’s ever worked on. But she was ready for the challenge.

“That would be amazing,” Beth said.

“This is a huge responsibility. It will be a lot more work, but an increase in salary, of course. But I think you’ll be a great fit to work with him. You’ve already proven that you’re a hard worker and that you get results. But I also think you bring a unique perspective because you’re around the target audience that we’d like to reach. And I think it’s about time that you’d be given a more substantial project to work on. I think you’re ready,” he said.

“I really appreciate this opportunity. I won’t let you down,” she told him.

“Oh, and one more thing. I don’t want you working on anything else right now. Harry Styles is your main priority,” Ron said. “Understood,” Beth responded.

Ron explained that Beth would be responsible for booking Harry on different interviews, including talk shows and radio shows. She would also be helping to plan and produce his music videos. The major project would be planning his world tour. Ron also told her that Harry would be coming to Columbia for a meeting in two weeks, to discuss the progress of his album.

On top of being a planner, Beth also liked to do her research. Before meeting Harry, she tried to get to know as much about him as possible. She was trying to understand what she was getting herself into. While Beth liked some of the One Direction songs that she heard on the radio, she never considered herself a huge fan. But regardless of whether she was a fan, she still understood the magnitude of working with someone that came from One Direction.

For the next two weeks, Beth went home and did hours of research every night on Harry, and One Direction. She watched countless interviews, talk show appearances, and live performances. She even went back to the days when he was on the X Factor. And of course, she had to listen to all five One Direction albums. The more she listened to their music, the more she started to find songs that she enjoyed. She realized that there was so much more to the band than the upbeat pop songs that she heard on the radio.

Beth had a few friends that worked in London, at Syco Records, which mainly managed One Direction. She started asking people about Harry, and what he was like to work with. She considered this furthering her research. Beth called her friend, Lucy, who worked at Syco, to get some information. Lucy was a few years older, and a bit more seasoned in the music industry.

“So, they recently told me that I’ll be the lead working with Harry Styles,” she told Lucy.

“That’s amazing! Congrats Beth!” Lucy said.

“Thank you! But I’m a little nervous. I’ve never worked with someone on this level. Can you give me an idea of what I’m in for?” Beth asked.

“Well, you’re very lucky that Harry is your first major artist. Whenever I interacted with him, he was always very pleasant to be around. Even when the band got massively successful, he remained humble and kind. He seemed to have a good head on his shoulders, but he also works very hard,” Lucy said.

“Good to know.”

Based on everything she learned, Harry had a reputation for being sweet, and pleasant to work with. She only heard good things about him, which seemed odd. In the music industry, most artists have at least a few questionable stories about then. Beth was starting to question her sources and wonder if all these positive stories were true. How could one person be so nice? So humble? So down to earth? So charismatic? She thought that there was no way that all these things could be accurate, so she tried to lower her expectations of Harry. She didn’t want to be disappointed if he didn’t live up to an image that she created in her head.

After two weeks of trying to gather as much information about Harry as possible, it was finally time for the big meeting.  While Beth had been around several successful musicians throughout her years at Columbia, she never worked directly with someone like Harry.  As the meeting was starting to come closer, she was growing more nervous to be in a room with someone like him. Beth hoped that Ron, and some of the other executives, would do most of the talking. She hoped that would ease some of her anxiety. She didn’t plan on speaking at all unless she was spoken to directly. Beth was good at planning and execution. But she wasn’t exactly the most sociable type. She was shy and nervous around any new person, let alone someone as famous as Harry Styles.

Beth had arrived early that morning. Even earlier than normal. She couldn’t be late for one of the biggest meetings of her life. Normally she would get breakfast before work, but she was too nervous to eat. She felt like she was going to throw up. She didn’t want to ruin this. If she messed this up, her career could be ruined. This was her opportunity to prove herself, and she couldn’t let herself fail. She had to show her bosses at Columbia that she was worthy of working with someone like Harry.

Right before the meeting was set to begin, Beth went into the bathroom to compose herself. She looked at herself in the mirror, noticing all the flaws in herself. She thought that she looked like a mess. And she felt like a mess. But she knew that she had to pull herself together. She touched up her makeup, reapplying her favorite bright red lipstick, and added some blush to her pale skin. After quickly brushing through her long hair, Beth decided that she was ready, or at least as ready as she would ever be. She took a deep breath and headed down the hall to the meeting.  

Beth, Ron, and other important executives from Columbia all sat around the conference table, waiting for Harry’s arrival. Luckily, he didn’t keep people waiting long, and he arrived right on time. He entered the room, alongside his manager Jeffrey. Harry walked around the room, and politely shook hands with everyone in the room. He even introduced himself, as if everyone didn’t already know who he was. As if this entire meeting wasn’t just for him. This was the kind of respectful behavior that Beth heard about.

When the nerves started to hit Beth, she tried to remind herself that she was around musicians all the time. But that didn’t change the fact that she was starstruck. She never expected that when Harry looked into her eyes to shake her hand, that she would feel butterflies in her stomach. It was like she was a teenager again. She didn’t understand why she was feeling like such a fangirl. Maybe it was because she had just spent the last two weeks watching videos of him, and now he was actually standing in front of her. She tried to brush away those feelings and remain professional. Besides, he was a global superstar who could have any woman that he wants. Why would he ever be interested in someone like her? How could she ever have a chance in the world?

“Hi, I’m Harry,” he said, shaking her hand.

“I’m Bethany. It’s nice to meet you,” she said, smiling at him, while she tried to maintain her composure.

“Bethany will be taking the lead in working on the day to day operations of promoting you and the album,” Ron explained.

“Nice to meet you, love,” Harry said.

  After everyone introduced themselves, it was time to get down to business. The people from the record label hadn’t heard any of Harry’s music yet, and they were anxious to get an update on his progress. They expected him to match the level of success that he had while he was in the band. Everyone was expecting him to do well.  

“So, Harry, tell us how your album is going,” Ron said.

“I think it’s going well so far. I’ve really been enjoying my time in the studio, getting to take my time with this one. You know, when I was in the band things were a bit more rushed. We’ve written a lot of songs so far. I think we’re close to deciding on the first single,” Harry told them.

“That’s good to hear. But, as you know, we’re a little nervous that we haven’t heard anything yet,” one of the executives told him.

“I guess, maybe, I’m a bit of a perfectionist. I usually don’t like to share something until it’s finished. Or almost finished. It’s still in progress. But I should have something to share with you soon,” Harry explained.

“That’s fine, Harry. But can we at least get an idea of what this new album might sound like?” another executive asked.

Beth could only imagine the type of pressure that Harry was feeling. Everyone wanted to know what his solo music would sound like. There was already a constant debate in their office of what they wanted from Harry. And now they got the chance to address him directly. Beth noticed that Harry was constantly looking in her direction. But she hadn’t said a word since she introduced herself. Each time that Harry tried to look into her eyes, Beth would look away, trying to seem distracted by the papers in front of her.

“Harry, your fan base is used to hearing pop music from you. I think you should stick with what people know and love,” one of the executives said.

“I disagree. I think he should go for a more mature sound since his audience has grown up. Maybe something more rock? Or folksy? I think that would suit his voice,” another executive said.

As each person gave their own opinions, Beth remained silent. She was just looking around, trying to take in what everyone else was saying. But she also started to tense up. She was itching to say something, but she was too scared to give her opinion. It seemed like Harry could tell how uncomfortable she was. After watching her internal struggle, Harry decided to address her directly.

“Bethany, what are your thoughts?” he asked her.

“Well… I think…. I think you need to make whatever music feels right,” she struggled to say, as she finally got her opinion out.

“But what about the fans? What if he goes too far off what they already know?” one of her bosses scowled.

“Can you expand on that, please?” Harry asked.

“Well, realistically, the fans that first fell in love with you from One Direction are older now. Hopefully, they’ll grow with you. But honestly, even if they don’t, we can’t just worry about your existing fans. That puts you into too much of a box. We don’t just want One Direction fans to listen to your music. We want a 40-year old man or a 65-year old grandmother to listen to your music and fall in love. But people will know if it’s fake or manufactured. I think you should do whatever feels authentic to you. People will be drawn to that,” Beth explained.

“I couldn’t agree more,” Harry said.  

Harry smiled, knowing that Beth was supportive of him. She felt drawn to him and wanted to be someone at the label who would be looking out for him.

After discussing some more details of the album, the executives at the label felt like they had everything they needed. Beth was happy that she was able to meet Harry before she began working on his album’s promotion. They all said goodbye to Harry, but after the meeting, he was waiting for Beth outside her office.

“Oh. Hi, Harry. How are you? Is there something I can help you with?” she asked, as she was a bit caught off guard by his presence.

“I just wanted to say thank you. I really appreciate you sticking up for me and telling them how you feel. It’s nice to know that I have your support,” Harry told her.

“You don’t have to thank me. As of right now, I’m exclusively working for you. So, I’m here to fight for you and be your cheerleader. Whatever you need from me,” she said, proudly smiling at him.

“Well, I appreciate that. Could I take you out for a drink to thank you?” he asked, abruptly.

“I don’t know… I’m supposed to be working for you. I don’t know if that would be appropriate,” she said, but she was struggling with the decision.

“Come on… What’s one drink? We can say it’s for business purposes if that makes you feel better,” he said.

“Well... I guess that would be okay,” she agreed, not needed much convincing.

“So, I’ll see you tonight?”

“I would love to,” she smiled. “Here, you’ll probably need this anyway, since we’ll be working together closely,” she said, as she wrote down her phone number and handed it to him.

Somehow, after only spending a few minutes with Harry, she was already more comfortable with him. She went from barely being able to look at him, to boldly giving him her phone number. She realized that she would probably be in constant contact with him for the next few months and that she would have to get used to being around him. And despite being this massively successful musician, he was still just a person. She shouldn’t treat him any differently. What’s the harm in going out with him? It didn’t have to mean anything. And how could she say no to Harry Styles? Beth was looking forward to working for him. But more importantly, she was looking forward to getting to know Harry for herself.

[lothirielswanmarvel]

MISSION REPORT: Initiate operation “group hug”.

“This is nice,” I mused, blowing on a coffee cup as I stared across the table at Bucky. Morning light filled the tiny diner. It looked so calm, so quaint...it made last night’s light show seem like a dream.

He shrugged. My eyes narrowed. Something about his left arm...it rubbed me the wrong way.

“Mrow, ” Kramer’s paw escaped my old gym bag and rattled my plate. I shushed him, and slipped a small piece of bacon into the opening.

“You had to bring him in?” Bucky asked.

“It's too cold in the car,” I told him, resting my chin on my elevated fingers.

A shadow fell over me.

“Is everything okay over here?” The waiter glanced between the two of us.

I nodded and smiled, “It's great, thanks.”

He beamed at me. “Enjoy your date.”

Date? My head tilted to the side as he walked off. I looked back to Bucky. That's probably what it looked like. Everyone accepted things as they appeared. I envied their simplicity.

“So who’s this friend of yours?” I stared down at the caramel-colored liquid of my coffee.

“We’ve...run in the same circles. In the past.” Bucky’s eyes kept darting around the restaurant. He never seemed to relax.

“Do you mind putting this on? They’re looking for your face, too,” Bucky flipped off his plum-colored baseball cap and offered it to me.

I tacked it on. His small smile returned.

“What?”

“You look...like a fine dane.” He frowned at the words.

I bit my lip to silence any laughter. “A fine dane?”

Bucky shifted in the booth. “Sorry...it's been awhile since I've used that line. On anyone.”

“It's a good line.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah. A little cheesy, but girls like that,” I replied.

Suddenly the sound of heels carried on the tile. I spotted the pair of boots responsible for the noise. I froze when I saw her face.

“I wish Steve had your enthusiasm for the dating world,” Natasha Romanoff stood before our table, tossing a wink at Bucky.

I was speechless at first. Her skin was fine porcelain, like marble, or the fine white thread of a spider web. Her crimson curls clashed like blood in the snow. Everything about her was striking.

She motioned for Bucky to scoot and sat down with us. She smirked at me.

“I'm June,” I choked out the words as I coped with my awe. “I...already know who you are.”

“Hi, June. She’s pretty, where’d you find her?”

“She’s my neighbor.”

“Huh.” Natasha leaned back against the old fashioned white-blue design of the cushions. “So you need a place to crash. Avengers Tower is open.”

My eyes popped out of their sockets. The offer was so casual, so genuine. Bullets were easier to get used to than Bucky’s high-class friends.

“I don't really have a good reputation with Starks, Natasha.”

“He doesn't know. And it wasn't your fault.”

Bucky shook his head. “Doesn't change what happened.”

Natasha’s fingers tap-danced across the slightly sticky surface of the table as she thought. “Maybe S.H.I.E.L.D. could help you out.”

“You’re joking, right?”

“No. Your name is on the Wall of Valor at every S.H.I.E.L.D. facility.” Natasha said. “But Fury’s still upset that you blew up his car…”

I shot Bucky a confused look.

“It was an accident,” He mumbled. “Sort of.”

Natasha’s widened eyes said otherwise. “Let’s see...we have tons of safe houses all over New York. You could stay in one of those until you get a grip on things.”

Bucky contemplated. I watched unmoving his facial expression when he was silent; he always had a serious look on his face. I was shocked at how little his face revealed, like he was encased in plaster for years.

Eventually his gaze wandered to me. “What do you think?”

I froze. “You're asking me?”

“It's your decision, too,” He said.

I thought about it. I wasn't really the expert; the only time I tried to hide from somebody was when I moved away from my extremely manipulative mother. But hiding from agents of an evil nazi organization…that seemed slightly more intense than mom—well, that woman could be the scourge of Germany—okay, I didn't have the time for this debate.

Hmm...New York was notorious for its busy streets and traffic from hell. It was a hub of activity. Easy to blend in. But Hydra could be around every corner…

“Is it safe?” I asked, feeling dumb.

Natasha answered, “Bullet-proof windows. Steel locks...I wouldn't choose it as a long-term plan, but it's a start.”

“Pet friendly?”

“I think Bucky will be comfortable,” Natasha smirked.

“Nat, come on.”

“What kind of pet is it? Is it a dog—? Who’s the little cutie?”

I glanced around the diner to make sure the waiter was occupied, then I unzipped my bag and Kramer’s wide eyes fell on Natasha.

The deadly assassin gasped. “Aww, it's a kitty! Can I hold him?”

I hoisted Kramer over the counter and into the Avenger’s awaiting arms. Natasha squished him into a hug. “What's Mr. Kitty’s name?”

“Kramer.”

“Like Seinfeld? Aww, he is just the cutest—you can even see the insanity in his eyes. Just like the character, that is adorable.”

Bucky shook his head silently.

Natasha juggled the cat as she pulled out a key. “Here—oh, what if I joined you guys and we could have a big road trip? I'm not ready to part with Mr. Kramer.”

Bucky turned in his seat and squinted at Natasha, innocently cuddling with the cat. “What’s your angle?”

Natasha’s eyes widened like a doll’s, childlike and naive. “Angle? Why, whatever are you referring to, Mr. Barnes?”

“Why do you want to travel with us to New York?”

“Because I like this cat, and I want to make sure that he and his super nice owner make it to their destination safely.”

“Uhuh.”

“I miss our old adventures—this could be our way of catching up. Did I ever tell you about Budapest?”

“Budapest? What's Budapest?” I piped up.

Both glanced at me. “Don't ask,” Bucky said.

Natasha petted Kramer dramatically with an amused smile, looking like a villain who had outsmarted the hero. “You said you needed help. So, let me help you.”

“Yeah, the last time you tried to “help” someone, Barton ended up stuck in the vents or some weird crap.”

“This has nothing to do with Barton—well, not just Barton.”

“Just Barton?”

The little bell at the door rang. Three people in hoodies and baseball caps walked across the room and stopped before our table.

Sam Wilson. Steve Rogers. Some random person with resting murder face.

My head tilted to the side. “Why are all of you wearing caps and hoodies?”

Resting-Murder-Face shrugged. “Incognito.”

Steve was busy staring at Bucky, the way I usually stared at the ice cream in the freezer. “Hey, Buck.”

Bucky groaned and laid his head on the sticky table. Sam Wilson noticed me and winked. “Hey, how you doin’? I'm—”

“Sam Wilson.” I answered for him, shaking the hand he offered to me. “Sorry—I heard about you on the news, what you did at D.C. You’re amazing.”

Sam beamed, his pearl-white teeth flashing. “I'm nobody special. Well, he's special—” Sam nudged his chin at Bucky, “—if you know what I mean.”

Sam and I laughed. Bucky scowled at both of us. I looked over at the guy with the angry expression. “Who’s this?”

Resting-Murder-Face turned his glare upon me. “You're kidding.”

“Why would I be kidding?”

“Clint? Clint Barton? Hawkeye?” He threw unfamiliar names at me. I just stared blankly.

Clint’s expression became slightly more murderous. “Arrow-guy? Best archer ever? Am I ringing any bells?”

“No, sorry. I've never heard of you.”

“Well, I’ll have you know, missy, that I’m one of the founding members of the Avengers.”

“Okay…”

“Remember that New York invasion? The aliens? I killed twelve of ‘em. You're welcome.”

“Oh...thanks.”

“And you’re welcome.”

“...You said that.”

“Clint.” Steve silenced him with a look. I couldn't get over Steve’s blond hair. It was just so...perfect-looking. Like it was styled with buckets of gel, yet it looked completely natural.

Bucky sighed. “You shouldn't be here. None of you.”

I ignored how much it stung when he said that. I leaned back in my seat, crossing my arms.

“June, I am truly sorry for ruining your life. I can never make up for that,” He said. I was shaking my head throughout the entire speech.

“What life? I lived alone, with my crazy cat, and cut people open for a living.” I remarked.

“Excuse me for asking, but what’s your profession again?” Steve asked politely.

“Cardiologist,” Natasha answered for me.

I blinked, trying to remember when I told her. “I don't think I told you that.”

“No, you didn't. Also, you were born on Long Island. Adopted, right?”

My arms tightened around my chest. “We just met, like, five minutes ago.”

“And now she knows your life story. That's Nat,” Clint concluded.

“If your true objective is to keep June safe, it would be easier with us on board,” Steve replied, ducking his head as the waiter passed by. Natasha hid the cat inside her leather jacket whenever someone looked over.

Bucky looked over at me. This time, there was a change in his face. His eyes tightened. He bit down on his lip.

“Fine. We’re going to New York. All of us.”

“Yay! Can we stop by Pet Supermarket and get this little cutie a tie? Or one of those mini-sweaters!”

[delicateheartstranger]

March 16, 2020

Dear world,

This has been started actually on the 15th, but since it will take awhile to write out everything I will mark it the 16th. 

So here begins my crappy 2000s movie start of a blog. Unlike the movies where at some point my blog will blow up and my life will take either a turn for the worse or better I have nothing to fear because that was barely realistic even back then. Since I wanna make sure though just in case any chance someone who knows me finds this I will not state my name. I’ll tell ya’ll this, I’m 19 years old and will be 20 in October, I like fandom shit, I’m trans, I’m pan, I wish I could go back and kill baby Hitler so I would never be born and no ww2, I’m in love with one my best friends, I have feelings for a guy I met online that lives in Norway while I’m stuck in the U.S., I suffer from ptsd/depression/anxiety/a fuck ton of just not being mentally stable, live at home with my parents right now, have no job, most of my close friends are toxic, and I have no privacy.

I was at college for a few month, but then a bunch of things happened and I had to drop out. When I came back home my parents I feel resented me a bit for not being stable enough to stay at that college (they loved it and want to send me back) so now my home life became a lot worse. I’m in a php program currently so even if it weren’t for the fact that my parents would rather roll over dead than have me work (earn money to get the fuck out) I can’t get one since most conflict with time. I’m 19 and only ever held one real job because my parents claim the house needs to be clean before I can work. I’m not the only one who lives here, but okay. Also I would make less messes if I wasn’t home. Top it off it’s like “we don’t want you working for other people before you do the work you owe us at home.” They have this whole family first idea, but the thing is I don’t feel a part of the family. They decided I had no say when I was younger when moving far from home, I wasn’t a part of it enough to get attention while my brother was sick, I wasn’t a part of it enough for them not to judge me to the point where I quit lots of things I loved just so they’d stop hurting me, I wasn’t enough a part of it that they would do things for me that would be what “family” does.

So yes I will put myself aka my mental health first because you guys never will. Because of the Corona outbreak my area has been quarantined. It means 2 weeks no school (wasn’t enrolls), no physical php, less people in public, and that good old shit. Thing is now my parents are trying to force my brother who’s off in college to come back home AND not let me see my friends physically while locking me up in our home. The most I can do if I wanna leave is go for a walk for like 30 minutes near our house. I hate walking as it just riles me up ever more and brings back bad memories of my parents forcing me to. They tried super hard when I was younger to walk the fat off me. Worked like a charm, said no one. If anything the many years of fat shaming made me gain weight as they didn’t get me a therapist, didn’t think I was depressed, didn’t let me take meds, and all I had was eating to comfort me. So yeah I’m basically trapped in my own house. I think I may fuck up. I’ve been around a month or two clean of self harm, but I know that will change in these coming weeks if I am forced to stay here alone with my folks and brother.

I usually have passive SI and SH thoughts, but within this weekend I’ve had so many that I was close to acting on them. They’ve gotten to the level of overwhelming that it’s like I’m back in 11th grade again. Which by the way, found out one my few friends from that time tried to MURDER my other friend (who is a bit newer, but still) is living in a house for people with murderous tendencies. So that’s just peachy. Oh another friend from high school has a brain tumor which probably will kill him and it makes me super sad even though we haven’t talked in years. I am currently upset about my life choices of who I made friends with.

My three best friends would be LM, DW, and LL. 

LL is a friend I made in my third high school. He’s kinda going through lots of shit right now. He used to realize that he couldn’t drink and that he could only smoke in small amounts. Now he’s back on his bs. He’s also having unsafe sex with strangers he met on tinder. Now it’s find to fuck around. Go live your best life. But if you are having unsafe sex that’s a problem. He is constantly having pregnancy scares (he’s trans). All of this while on the fact that when he’s not too fucked up he’s like kinda self center. I told him like the other night when he was doing better that I was feeling really down given some shit I got for being fat, but I was fine talking. This man goes ahead and spends the whole time talking about all these stories about himself and doesn’t let me speak for like the whole time. And he was like on this thing about how I need to do something, but he never got there. Don’t tell me how to self improve when you’re in a worse state than me. 

Then there is DW. I’ve been in love with him since middle school. We met at this outside of school after school activity. I fell hard. When I first confessed to him he didn’t really speak to me and avoided me for about a year. Then we became friends again due to weird grouping things at that after school activity. Irony was I was trying to get into the group he wasn’t in so I would lose my feelings. Then after we got close again I confessed my feelings, again. Some how that made us best friends? I mean I’m glad he didn’t cut me off again don’t get me wrong, but it just wasn’t what I was expecting. Now here’s some hard shit. About almost a year ago over the summer (2019) we were talking about my weird love life. You see I still tried to date outside of him. Can’t keep going after something that won’t happen. Then I asked about his love life as it’d been like months since I brought it up directly with him. Turns out he’d been dating a girl for almost a YEAR. He just “forgot” to tell me. I understand he could’ve been worried about my feelings, but I’m more hurt that he hid something that big away from me and lied about it too. We’re supposed to be best friends. Course I don’t wanna hear about how he fucks her or whatever. I just wanna be there for him. And so now I’m getting a taste of my own medicine. He is talking about her. How they go on dates, how they had a dear valentines day date, how he cares about her, how she even was in the same php program as me. I wanna fucking strangle her. She used to be my friend, but we grew apart. Then of course I find out that she’s dating the love of my life. Cool. Worst is when me and him are texting and she has the NERVE to try and talk to me. I don’t ever wanna speak to her again. I will if it makes DW happy, but for my sanity and her life I will avoid that. She’s a fine person, props forgot about me and my feelings for him, and doesn’t deserve the utter rage I hold for her. That don’t change it though. All of this on top the fact we’ve been distantly lately. I noticed about like 5 months ago how I was always the one texting DW and that started our convos. How I was the one putting in effort. So I started to text less. He only about 5 times started the conversations. It was over memes and reply to my general instagram stories. I’ve given up and realized if I want him in my life have to do the texting. I won’t let him go anymore. I’ve tried in the past, it don’t help anything. No matter what I try I need him and even if it’s bad for me it’s no worse than not having him.

Now we are on my closest and most toxic best friend. LM. LM I also met in my third high school. She was kind and charismatic. Thing is she is unstable, manipulative, controlling, hurtful, and just really toxic to me. She’s the alpha of the friend group I’m in with her. She can hurt me so much. I’ve tried taking breaks from her in the past, but when that happens she gets angry. She tried in these times to ruin my reputation. She has so much dirt on me. Top it off she lies like crazy and people just like, believe her? The only ones who have been able to see through her shit would be: Me, LL, and MA. That’s it. Not even her own sister can, least she doesn’t show it. It’s shit like, let’s say I was embarrassed by something and felt bad. LM would say I sobbed over it and yeah. Or she also just full on lies about me doing or saying something. It’s too the point where she’s said things about me that could get me in legal trouble if she told some authority figure and they believed her. Like she claims one time that I was about to drug one my crushes if she wasn’t there to stop me and that I masturbated with his jacket when he left the room in his closet. Yes I’m not proud of it, but when I was in a bad head space I thought about the idea/fantasy of having him take horny pills that SHE showed me and offered me. I did also once smell up my crush’s jacket in the closet. Not proud of it at all. I wasn’t stable and wasn’t thinking in my right mind. Doesn’t make what I did okay, but I did not do anything that would be as fucked as she claimed. Sometimes with that old crush she’ll bring it up saying straight up lies like I went to his house. Never did. Did find my crush on white pages (again not okay, but I wasn’t healthy), but never went anywhere near him outside of our setting. So yeah if I cut her off or just take a break she could realllly ruin my life given everyone believes ever word she says. All of that and I’m still a bit bitter over her manipulating a situation where me, her, and a few friends had a crush on the same guy. She lied saying she didn’t have feelings for him. She told us to confess and when we were like ‘idk not to ready for that’ she went ahead and did it for us. He didn’t like us back which is valid. But then she got really handsy and did things that basically helped him fall for her. Now I don’t have feelings for him anymore. If I do imma just push em away given he wouldn’t be good for me. But they constantly do things now as a couple that feel like an invasion on my being. THEY HAD SEX WITH THE DOOR SLIGHTLY OPEN IN THE ROOM NEXT TO ME ONLY TO LIE STRAIGHT TO MY FACE. So they couldn’t see I’d woken up. I was facing the door and they were full on sex. Like I heard the moans. I heard it all. I knew they were fucking. So when they finished and went to wake me up I pretended to be asleep. Then later that day I brought it up to my friend CS (her boyfriend/ex crush) I thought they were having sex cause I could heard them in my dream, he lied to my face saying I was crazy. Straight up gas lighting tactics LM would use. This isn’t the first time they tried that. Even when I was with someone and we both were like yeah we heard ya’ll having sex they denied it and said we were crazy. Like please just don’t fuck when there are others around or at least have the decency to do it where we can’t hear/wake up from it.

All of this said about each one I love them all dearly. And it’s hard the idea of losing them. It’s just so shitty dealing with all their shit on top of my own. 

Now the worse thing happening right now that I can’t even talk to a friend about it that I got my new name outed. So my parents are transphobic, but diet transphobic. Like they “support” trans rights yet do really transphobic things.I came out to them a few months ago and not a SINGLE time have they used the right pronouns. Then when bringing up trans things they have shot me down claiming xyz. I just wanna be me, but the same time I don’t want to set myself up for disappointment. At my php program I go by my chosen name. I told all the staff my situation at home yet the nurse managed to fuck up when emailing and wrote in an email that was attached to my parents my chosen name. So great my parents probably know something is up. I’m gonna fucking cry if they hurt me more. They already invalidate me on so many things I can’t stand the idea of them doing so on something so close and core to my identity. They do it with everything else and most things core to who I am. I had one safe space and the nurse had to fuck it up for me. I just can’t fucking deal with all this.

Top it off the one good person in my life, ESK hasn’t spoken to me in about 3 days now. ESK is someone I met online who lives in Europe. He’s genuinely the only good thing in my life. The only non toxic source of happiness. He brings me so much joy. I’m pretty sure he also has feelings for me or had them at one point. He’s 2 years younger than me and is turning 18 soon. I wanna get him a gift, but not only would that be weird, but he also hates celebrating his birthday. So I’ll just wish him a happy birthday when it comes around. Regardless I might not even be able to since he hasn’t responded in awhile. He has some serious health problems so I am worried he could be really sick. That or he’s angry at me/hates me/doesn’t wanna talk anymore. It could be just my anxiety, but the same time it could be true. I hate that I can’t tell. I can’t even talk to any of my bffs about it since they’ll all be super judgmental. Maybe DW, but even then it’d be hard. I just wanna make sure ESK is okay. He means the world to me. I don’t want to lose him. This is all happening after we both showed full face selfies of ourselves in our last convos. I hope he doesn’t think I’m ugly. It’d break my heart into toooooo many pieces if my looks scared him away or made him lose his romantic feelings for me. It’s not like we could date rn as not only are we an ocean away, but I’m far to emotionally unstable to. But hey that won’t matter if he drops off the face of the earth.

Lastly before I go I wanna talk about this girl in my php program who is legit making me crazy. We will call her LLL. She looks and acts just like my first crush, but if she’d grown up. The only difference is her eye color, age, and where she’s from. She isn’t her, but boy that doesn’t stop my lizard brain. I feel like a piece of trash whenever my eyes wander over her more revealing parts. It’s bad to objectify women and bad that I’m placing this role on her. Plus I’m like 90% sure she’s straight and like 60% she has a thing for a guy in our php group (who is much hotter than me). It’s just so hard since I lost my crush via my abusive grandma. It was her fault I didn’t wake up in time (I was 9) which meant I never got her number. I remember my heart sinking seeing her wave good bye to me from her car window as she drove off. I never really got over her as I just repressed any sense of being not cis het. I only really realized what I had for her was more than “wanting to be bffs” like a year or two ago. Still haven’t had the proper therapy to undo all my baggage. I really hope she hasn’t realized that my eyes linger on her just a little too long or that my feet are always pointing towards her. I want it to be a safe space for her.

SO yeah. That’s like 2% of my life rn plus 1% back story. You guys can tell I say like, so, and ya’ll a tad too much. I don’t know what to do and I have to wake up at 7. If anyone sees this I hope you can give me advice before it’s too late.

Yours cordially,

A.

[timeisacephalopod]

Belated

I thought hmm, lets write a little Tony/Eddie/Venom thing for Reasons. And yeah I know Tony’s bday was two days ago but still. I’ve decided that this is a thing I have written for a fictional character’s belated birthday!

*

Tony’s half buried in paper work ready to throw all caution to the wind and throw himself out a window when Eddie walks in looking pleased with himself. Probably means he sniffed out a good story and he’s found something compelling but he doesn’t look like an absolute human disaster so he’s not too deep into it yet. Once he is he kind of looks like he’s homeless and Rhodey doesn’t really get the charm but Tony once watched Eddie overheat to the point of just fucking losing it and sitting in a lobster tank at one of the fanciest restaurants in Manhattan so he thinks Eddie is the best. Venom being around doesn’t seem to help that except now maybe he’ll eat the lobsters instead of just bothering the hell out of them.

“Happy birthday,” he says, walking over to him and behind his desk, greeting him with a kiss.

Except Tony’s kind of confused. “Wasn’t my birthday last week?” he asks and Eddie frowns.

“No, honey its today. I... who forgets their birthday? And why would you assume everyone in your life also forgot your birthday?” he asks. He looks extra confused but that’s probably just the way Eddie’s expressions work. Rhodey finds his over expressing annoying but Tony thinks it's endearing.

“You all have lives, its fine,” Tony says. Pepper’s always busy running around doing things for him, Eddie seems to have found himself some new thing to rip apart for the next couple months, and Rhodey regularly gets shot at so he figures they all have more pressing concerns. 

Eddie sighs. “Sometimes I think you’re a prick and then you do something sad like make excuses for why everyone in your life would forget you were born. We didn’t forget, Tony, you got the date wrong. How did you forget when you were born?”

He shrugs, “I don’t memorize useless details. And in your defense I am a prick,” he says. They both know it, though Eddie is obviously a lot less hostile then when they met. He seems to have fallen for Tony’s charms, which he’s been reliably informed are pretty disarming.

Eddie leans in and gives him another kiss, “no you’re not, but you play one well,” pulling away and dropping his bag on Tony’s desk. Its disrupted his thread bare attempt at organizing his own life- not exactly his strong suit admittedly not that he’d tell Eddie he's managed to mess up what little organization he had. He pulls a stack of files out of his bag and drops them on top of Tony’s already too large pile of paper work. “Happy birthday, an organized list of all the moral and ethical problems I have with your company,” he says, grinning like its the best gift ever.

Tony snorts and starts laughing, shuffling closer to Eddie. He lays one hand on Eddie’s hip and pokes at the pile of folders with the other. “Well this is... intimidating.”

“Yeah, but you’ll look through it all because you do genuinely want to be a good person. You should be glad I didn’t go with V’s gift,” he says, wincing.

Fuck, Tony can only imagine when one of the first five things he did in Eddie’s body was eat several people’s heads. Sure, V turned out to be an overly sappy romantic ass goo alien but that’s a pretty rough start to things and now Eddie has to live with kind of eating people that one time several times. “Was it flowers?” he asks.

Eddie laughs, “that was suggestion like... fifty two. After I banned violence, drugs, sex- don’t give me that look it was a soft ban because that’s not a present, terrorist activities, harassing children, petty crimes of all varieties, eating heads, murder, grand theft auto, breaking and entering, space, possession, and about a half a dozen other things. He’s not too good with presents.”

“Well, he did alright with the cat,” Tony points out. V doesn’t really get Christmas, turns out his species wasn’t too cuddly and had no holidays, but he does have all Eddie’s memories of it. Conveniently, he tends to lean more towards Eddie’s view of Christmas as mostly a capitalist holiday that’s far more about big businesses making money, overworking retail employees, and present buying pressure that leads to suicide than the happy stuff. And that doesn’t even touch on Eddie’s view of religion. Though to be fair V probably gathered a lot more religious vitriol from Tony than Eddie.

“He’s threatened to eat that cat at least once a day since he decided to pick it out. Claims he’s a dog person,” Eddie says.

“Dogs are bigger, usually, so I’m not really surprised. More meat.” Given the look on Eddie’s face Tony’s going to assume V has agreed with that statement.

“We are not eating dogs,” Eddie hisses. Mostly he only does that around Tony, but its hilarious when he does it in public because most people don’t really recognize him anymore so he looks like a homeless loon being led around by a celebrity. Or at least he did before he became recognizable again through Tony’s fame and yeah, Tony knows all Eddie’s opinions on celebrity culture. None of them are positive and yeah, Tony can see why that is.

“Tell V to go hunt New York rats at night. He might have fun with that,” Tony says. “Wait, does Venom have a birthday? That a thing his species does?”

Eddie shakes his head. “Says he doesn’t have a proper earth date translation for his hatching day and I know he didn’t come from an egg so that’s a horrifying term to use. Do not enlighten me, V. I’m happy to stay in the dark.” He makes another face and Tony assumes V has let out some detail Eddie didn’t want to hear.

“That ever get annoying, the voice in your head?” he asks. Feels like it’d be exhausting. Tony doesn’t even like his own voice in his head let alone some random alien who decided pretty much on a whim to save the world strictly because he likes Eddie. Though to be fair Riot was an asshole and Tony was sick of being compared to Carlton Drake anyway. Guy was like cartoonishly evil. Though Tony will admit that he was good looking and damn smart, even if that didn’t really turn out to be a good thing later.

“Sometimes,” Eddie says, “but mostly  V offers some good entertainment on human customs. Turns out his species tended to eat each other to solve problems. He thinks our petty politics is fun to watch.”

Yeah, an alien would find that funny. Or everyone outside of America at least until America decides to invade for oil or some other resource. “So who did he want to possess?” Tony asks, grinning.

“No!” Eddie says, presumably to him and Venom.

*

Tony’s laying in bed pretending to have died when Eddie walks over and crawls over him, laying his entire weight on Tony’s back. He sighs because of course Eddie would find the most inconvenient way to get him to stop taking up the entire bed. “This is a king and you’re like three feet tall. How is it that you take up so much space?” Eddie asks as Tony starts wiggling around.

“Ask the cat, she’s a hell of a lot smaller than me and she always manages to take up at least half the bed.” Eddie rolls off and Tony props himself up. “Thanks for the present by the way, half the stuff you pointed out happens to be things I was already looking to fix.” But Eddie is a fuck of a lot picker than him and its nice to have someone trying to hold him to account. And Eddie has no problem doing so, he gives Tony his opinion on a lot of things all the time whether or not he wants to hear them.

“Yeah, I got you something else too but its taking eighty years in the mail so I had to improvise,” Eddie says.

“Let me guess, you refuse to use Amazon,” Tony says.

“Look, that fuckstick can’t even pay his workers and he’s the richest guy in the world, and what’s all that crazy shit about pissing in-” Eddie starts but Tony cuts him off before he really gets going.

“Jeff Bezos is a prick, I get it. Actually, might get stuck at the same charity event with him next week so I can bring you along if you want to punch him,” Tony says.

The bright look of unbridled glee in Eddie’s eyes makes him smile. Yeah, he’s maybe argued a lot about Tony’s wealth, but he at least appreciates that Tony does his best to spread it around a little. Its just that he has trust issues and he knows how corporate charity works- its all tax write offs and siphoning money out of most of the ‘donations.’ So he does his best to do his research and lucky him Eddie is probably a little too good at it so he’s got some more reputable charities to share with. And he thinks its fun to pay off random people’s debt. If he’s having a bad day he’ll pick a person and bam, debt free. He likes making people happy so Eddie only kind of side eyes his money.

Generally that means he only brings it up like twice a day instead of non-stop and if nothing else Tony can appreciate that he’s passionate about his views. Rhodey thinks he’s annoying but Rhodey isn’t dating him so he can deal with it.

“Yeah, alright,” Eddie says but the way he says it tells Tony that he’s not talking to him.

“Do not eat his head, V!” Tony says, panicked. “I do not want to deal with the fallout of that. Just ruin his life like a normal person. Get JARVIS to help, he’s been helpful in my long standing efforts to ruin Hammer.”

“Yeah, pretty sure all you two have managed to do is turn Hammer into the knockoff version of you, but he uh... seems to like that so I don’t know.”

Tony damn well knows he looks offended because that’s the fucking rudest shit he’s ever heard. “What did you just call Hammer?” he asks.

Eddie realizes his mistake right away and Tony fucking resents that he looks a little dead behind the eyes because he was the one who damn well decided Hammer was good enough to be the anything version of him. “I would sooner take Carlton Drake as the cheap version of me than Hammer,” Tony hisses. “At least Drake was actually smart and hot! What’s Hammer? He looks like he came out of the womb dressed as the class clown who decided to be an accountant!”

Honestly Tony resents that Eddie sighs at that. “No V, you can’t eat Hammer’s head,” Eddie mumbles.

“Yes you can,” Tony tells him.

*

Tony’s attempting to make coffee while also ignoring Eddie due to his previous transgressions. Compare him to Hammer on his birthday. The disrespect. Eddie walks out of their bedroom and Tony resolutely ignores him as he starts looking around the pent house for some reason. Tony side eyes him as he moves a bunch of papers around- Eddie’s, not his, knocks the pillows off the couch, and picks up the cat. He looks at Cotton for a moment, frowning before he shakes her a little. She meows in an annoyed, disgruntled way and Eddie sighs, releasing the cat.

“Uh, the fuck are you doing?” Tony asks eventually.

Looking for me says a voice in his head and Tony throws his coffee cup, startling so badly his entire body jerks and he slips, falling on his ass.

“Oh thank god I thought he went and possessed some random secretary so he could go eat heads!” Eddie says, rushing over to him.

“Oh no, you stay back there you don’t get to come near me or V after comparing Hammer to me!” he says, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

Eddie sighs. “Tony-” he starts but Tony has already picked himself up and turned around with his arms crossed, ignoring him.

So rude. Venom agrees. We should eat Hammer V says, perhaps a little too enthusiastically.

Tony sighs and it pains him to do this, truly. “V, we can’t actually eat Hammer,” he says in perhaps the most dejected, upset tone he’s ever produced.

Eddie gives him, Venom technically, an offended look. “You decided to crawl into him in the middle of the night and risk killing him so you could eat someone?” he asks, hand pressed to his heart quite like an offended PTA mom. “V, you better get your ass back in here!” Eddie tells him, pointing at himself.

He compared you to Hammer. We should leave him, go sight seeing V says.

Tony rolls his eyes. “V you aren’t going to manipulate me into carrying your ass out of here because Eddie put you in the dog house.”

“Venom!” Eddie says, voice rising.

Tony swears to god he feels Venom extend from his body and that is some worrying fucking shit how’s Eddie put up with that? “Tony thinks you sound like an offended PTA mom,” Venom tells Eddie and Tony squints.

“Since when the hell are you a rat?” he asks.

Venom turns to face him, “you take that back! I am not vermin!”

“No, technically you’re a parasite now get back here,” Eddie tells him.

“Maybe I will find a new home with hosts who appreciate me,” Venom says, sinking back into Tony and he does not like that.

“How do you get these things out?” he asks.

Eddie walks over and leans in, squinting at Tony shrewdly except he’s actually looking at Venom and Tony’s not sure how he knows that. “If you don’t get back in me I will play Bohemian Rhapsody at top volumes with Tony pressed against the speaker!” he hisses.

“That kind of sounds like fun minus the speaker thing,” Tony says.

“They don’t do so well with loud noises and vibrations,” Eddie explains and oh, that makes sense. Tony watches as black goo extends from his hand to Eddie’s and it almost looks resentful for it. Or maybe Tony’s imagining that.

Tony gives Venom a sad look as the last of him disappears back into Eddie. “I’m so sad he won’t ever experience Freddy Mercury like the rest of us,” he says, hand pressed to his heart.

Eddie sighs. “V says your music taste is heinous and he would rather listen to my music.”

He listens to exclusively shitty electronica music. “I’m leaving you both,” Tony tells him, turning and walking away.

[green-eyeddragonfanfiction]

Two of a Kind: Chapter 5

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x Dark Elf!Reader Summary: You left Svartalfheim before the first victory against your people and avoided the extinction by living in Sakaar, the home of all lost things like yourself. You lived there for a long time and built yourself a sort of home there… until a couple of Asgardians show up and ruin everything for you. .All hell breaks loose on Sakaar and you and Loki are left trying to pick up the pieces of your plans. Warnings: Swearing, space slavery Word Count: ~3,065 A/N: Is habbenings. I’m trying to work through my WIPs one by one.

Masterlist // Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

When you leaned back, Loki’s eyes were dark and heated, though a sharp edge of distrust glinted just below the surface. “What was that for?” he parroted your words from moments earlier.

You smiled genuinely at him and, with a deep breath, laid all your cards on the table knowing full well it might bite you in the ass. “Do I need a reason to kiss someone I find absolutely enchanting? I like you, Loki, and that is reason enough to want to kiss you.”

Loki swept into the guest room you’d been staring in and slammed the door behind him.

“He didn’t listen,” he spat.

“Hello to you, too,” you said dryly from your spot on the couch.

Loki spared you an eye roll before he began pacing in front of you. “He wants to go back to Asgard, but it’s absolute madness. Our sister has assuredly seized control by now. Going back would be to court death,” he seethed.

You tracked his dogged progress back and forth with your eyes. “You didn’t go to see him, did you?” you asked, eyes narrowed.

He froze and glared at you. “What? Of course I did!”

You tilted your head. “In person?”

His face twisted in disgust. “Do you take me for a fool? That place is disgusting.”

You groaned and slumped back onto the couch. “You are a fool.”

He bristled and took a step towards you. “And yet you still thought me capable of tricking the Grandmaster and helping you-”

You stood in a flash and clapped a hand over his mouth. “Careful what you say, Loki. I didn’t find any surveillance equipment, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t any,” you said, quiet and deadly. When it was clear he’d calmed you removed your hand from his mouth and gestured to the couch behind you. “Sit. Please.” He looked mildly mutinous but acquiesced after a beat.

“What are we going to do? He’s unwilling to help,” Loki said in a much more subdued tone.

“Did he say that?” you asked as you crawled on his lap. His arms were around your waist immediately and, as much as you wanted to, you didn’t relax into his arms.

He scowled at the mention of his brother. “All he cares for is returning home.”

You shrugged. “Then all we need to do is ensure his goals align with ours.”

Loki raised a brow. “I can hardly see how that’s possible.”

You grinned wickedly at Loki and rested your forehead against his. “He wants off Sakaar. The Grandmaster doesn’t want that. If he’s as capable as you say he is, his escape would be more than enough of a distraction to make our move.”

Loki stared at you a bit distantly, likely working through the logistics. “You wish to use him.”

“He gets what he wants and we get what we want.”

Loki’s green eyes are unusually tempestuous. “When?”

You studied his face carefully from behind your mask. “Not tonight. He’ll be heavily guarded until his match. Maybe in a few days, when things have calmed down a bit. If he lives, that is.”

Loki’s face darkened. “He won’t wait that long.”

You shrugged and rested your head on his shoulder. “He won’t have a choice.”

“I have to get off this planet.”

You’d seen Loki cocky, calculating, cunning, and even caring, but up until this exact moment, you’d never seen him absolutely terrified.

He moved to bolt for the door, but you grabbed him before he made it more than two feet and shoved him into the white couch. “Where the hell do you think you’re going?” you hissed as you sat down next to him.

He didn’t have time to answer because a second later the Grandmaster paraded into the room, broad grin on his face. He greeted a few others in his private box, but quickly sat down. It was time for the main event.

When the Lord of Thunder (Thor?) spoke, though, you almost wished you’d let Loki leave.

“Hey! Hey, we know each other! He’s a friend from work,” the blond belted from down in the arena.

The Grandmaster turned to look at Loki, but both of you stared straight ahead. Loki cleared his throat conspicuously and you jabbed him in the ribs with your elbow.

Thankfully, the Grandmaster became distracted the moment the fight started. You glanced at Loki out of the corner of your eye, but he too was so focused on the action that he nearly flinched when you hissed, “What the hell was that?”

Loki’s eyes stayed riveted to the action. “I know him.”

You glared at him. “He’s your brother. I’d hope you do.”

Loki shook his head and finally stared at you for more than a second. “The other one.”

You gaped at him, then at Hulk, and then back at him. We’re talking about this the moment we’re alone,” you whispered.

He nodded, but then Thor landed a blow on Hulk that sent the big green man flying and the entire arena went silent.

“What?” the Grandmaster murmured, aghast.

To his credit, Loki was sunk back in his seat, trying to look as unassuming as possible and failing spectacularly.

Apparently you didn’t have to worry about the Grandmaster’s champion being defeated, though, because a moment later Thor was being thrown about like a rag doll.

Except the sight made Loki stand up and screech, “Yes! That’s how it feels!” so loudly the entire room stared at him, including you and the Grandmaster. He seemed to realize he fucked up, though, because he covered the outburst with a half assed, “I’m just a huge fan of the sport.”

The Grandmaster was happy enough, though, that he didn’t question it.

You yanked Loki back down onto the couch and gave him A Look that he valiantly ignored by watching the action.

The two contenders traded blows back and forth. Eventually the Lord of Thunder got the upper hand. Just as he was about to make a winning blow, however, the Grandmaster activated his control disc and the blond went down like a puppet with the strings cut.

You’d been expecting it, but it still made you grimace as the Hulk leapt into the air and barreled straight for him.

“I hope he’s as tough as you claim,” you whispered to Loki, who was wincing. 

“As do I,” he said faintly.

“Sakaar, hear ye. Attention please. I have some bad news. My beloved exalted champion has turned up missing. Take to the streets. Celebrate my champion...”

You turned your head slowly to stare at Loki, who was staring at the nearest speaker with a dumbstruck expression.

“It seems that that criminally seductive Lord of Thunder has stolen him away. Take to the streets...”

You’d stopped listening to the announcement and so had Loki if the look he gave you was anything to go by.

“It seems we’ve underestimated my brother,” he said faintly.

You grabbed his arm and immediately started marching him in the direction of the Grandmaster’s palace. “You need to go talk to the Grandmaster. Do some damage control. My people aren’t in place yet.”

He dug his heels in, bringing both of you to a stop. “You want me to go back in there? With that psychopath? He’ll kill me!”

You spun around and glared at him. “If you don’t go he’ll assuredly send people out to kill you. If you go in good faith and intrigue him in some way, he’ll give you a chance to bring your brother back. He likes you too much to kill you immediately.”

Loki narrowed his eyes at you and fell into step beside you as you continued your march towards the palace. “And where will you be?”

“Getting my people in order. We’re making our move today.”

He sent you a worried look. “You’re sure?”

You huffed out a sigh and glared at nothing in particular. “No, but we won’t get another chance like this again.”

The palace came into view and you stuttered to a halt and reached out for his hand, once more tugging him to a stop. Before he could even ask why you’d stopped him, you unhooked your mask and slipped if off your face. You pulled him in with your free hand and kissed him, hard and fierce. He recovered from the surprise in a heartbeat and kissed back with just as much passion. Your blood pounded in your veins but you reluctantly pulled away and slipped your mask back on.

“Don’t die, Loki,” you said sternly, fingertips ghosting over his cheek.

He looked confused and unused to such displays of affection, so he simply nodded and, with a last lingering look, turned and jogged away towards the palace.

You watched him until he disappeared into the crowd then pulled out your communication device and immediately rang Halu.

He picked up within seconds. “What’s up, boss? I’m hearing a lot of chatter coming from the capital. Something wrong?”

“Get the crew ready and over here now, Halu. It’s time.”

Halu’s normally affable exterior hardened and he nodded. “You got it, boss.”

He was late. He was supposed to check in a half hour ago, but there was only radio silence on his end.

Sakaar was in an uproar. It seemed like someone had powered down the control disc mainframe, and now the Grandmaster’s slaves were running the town. You’d already had to kill more than a few that knew you by sight and reputation; cretins eager to get back at you for being a successful scrapper.

It was by complete accident, then, that you happened upon Loki while waiting for Halu to arrive in the hangar.

He was convulsing violently on the ground and, even though you couldn’t see it, you knew he was being zapped by a control disc.

“Where is it?” you asked him, hoping he’d be able to hear you over the pain.

His eyes swiveled frantically to a spot on the other side of himself and you spotted it a few seconds later. You ran over to it and quickly pressed the button on top.

Immediately Loki let out a sigh of relief, reached behind himself, grabbed the control disk, and threw it over the walkway where it fell a long way to the bottom of the hangar.

“What the hell happened?” you asked as you rushed over to him, checking him over for any injuries. It was a show of how tired he was that he didn’t shoo you away.

“I’m afraid my brother got the drop on me,” he hissed as he rubbed at the tender spot on his back.

You raised an eyebrow at that and opened your mouth to give him shit, but, before you could, the elevator door opened and out stepped a small group of former contenders.

You and Loki froze and stared at them apprehensively.

“Hey, man. Elf Lady. We’re about to jump on that ginormous spaceship. You wanna come?” the Kronan in front asked.

You gave him a disgusted look. “What? Of course we don-” Your words died in your throat at the look on Loki’s face. “You want to go,” you whispered, seeing the truth on his face no matter how neutral he tried to keep his expression. If the Kronan cared about you unceremoniously ignoring him, he gave no sign as you turned your back on them and clasped Loki’s shoulders firmly. “Why? You would be great here. We’re so close, Loki. This close to making this whole planet ours.”

His eyes were distant. “You mean yours.”

The icyness of his stare stunned you momentarily and your arms dropped from his shoulders. “No, Loki. Ours.”

His face finally showed some tiny hint of emotion, but it was anger. “Save your prettied words for more gullible fools.”

You stumbled backwards as though struck. He seemed viscerally satisfied by that reaction, which hurt you almost as much as the coldness had in the first place.

“Will you not let yourself be happy for once?” you whispered, shoulder sagging. “Can you not believe that I care for you? Do you think me incapable of such a thing?”

He narrowed his eyes at you. “You’ve known me for barely a month.”

You gazed sadly at him from behind your mask. “And yet I care more for you than I have for any living creature in memory.”

“You lie,” he whispered.

Anything you could have said in return, though, was drowned out by the sound of dozens of engines as Halu and your crew flew into the hangar.

You looked away from the ships to Loki, who was staring at you. He seemed ready to bolt at the drop of a hat.

“You won’t change your mind, will you? You’re going after your brother?” you asked him over the hum of the engines.

Those wicked green eyes stayed trained on your face as he nodded.

You sighed heavily. “Shit...” you whispered so quietly you knew he couldn’t hear.

“Boss!”

Halu and your generals were exiting their ships and walking over, looking confused and a bit bloodthirsty. Things outside must have really picked up. 

You turned away from the group of former contenders and Loki, and sauntered forward a few steps. Halu and the generals stopped, looking to you expectantly.

“Halu.”

“Yes, Boss?”

You slowly took your jacket off and your crew froze, confused. You hadn’t changed after taking over Gharui’s and the jacket you had on was a symbol of your authority; a mantle of power. To wear the jacket was to be the leader of your gang.

It dangled from your hand as you held it out between you and Halu and you took off the bottom of your mask with your other hand.

“Hear my words! From this day onward, Halu Savari shall be the leader of the South Sakaar Scrapper Gang! May he lead you as I have- to glory and wealth- and may you follow him as faithfully as he has followed me for thousands of years! Victory to the South Sakaar Scrappers!”

Your generals echoed your final words, but Halu stood frozen, hands tucked firmly at his sides.

“Boss?” he whispered, taken aback.

“No, Halu. That’s you... if you’ll just take the damn jacket,” you said quietly, smirking at the taller man.

Slowly, as if he couldn’t believe what was happening, Halu reached out and took the jacket from your outstretched hand. It was with a bittersweet smile that you watched him shrug the jacket on. It was a tight fit because of how much larger he was, but it had been big on you to begin with.

You clapped him on the shoulder and gave him one last smile. “Good luck, Halu. Kick the Grandmaster’s ass so I have a nice place to come visit, alright?”

Halu grinned widely, having realized that had really happened and he wasn’t on a bad trip of jast or something. “You got it... (Y/N).”

You turned from each other at the same moment. You could hear him giving directions to your- no, his- scrappers, but you only had eyes for one man.

Loki was staring at you with wide, distrusting eyes. “I don’t understand.”

You shrugged your shoulders, missing the familiar weight of your jacket but feeling oddly... free. “I’m coming with you.”

“You’re coming with me? To save my brother and what remains of Asgard from our evil sister, Hela?” he asked, disbelief clear in his voice.

You shrugged. “Is that what we’re doing? Do we have a plan?”

He gaped at you. “You can’t be serious. You just gave up... everything... to come on a suicide mission with me?”

You grinned wickedly at him. “It’s only a suicide mission if we die.”

Loki groaned and ran a hand down his face. “You sound like my brother.”

You laughed at that. “Well, if he got the better of you, I can’t say I take offense to that.”

Loki stared at you for a moment or two longer; long enough for you stop chuckling to yourself. “You’re serious.”

Your smile turned to something a little more vulnerable and you closed the distance between you. “About you? Always.” Before he had a chance to respond you stood on your toes and sealed your lips together in a kiss. It was brief but tender and when you pulled back he was staring at you with a spark of wonder his eyes. “I see you, Loki. Just you. And you will always be more than enough for me.”

His smile was tiny but his eyes shone bright with emotion and you smiled at the sight.

That was until a loud noise snapped you out of the moment.

The Kronan was blowing his nose into what seemed like an entire tablecloth, sand falling down from its folds. If you hadn’t seen him do it you would have assumed the sound came from a ship, as loud as it was.

“That was just... beautiful,” the Kronan said tearfully.

Loki groaned and you smiled as his head thunked heavily onto your shoulder. “They’re our ride, aren’t they?” you asked knowingly as you reached down and twined your fingers with his.

“I’m afraid so,” he said despairingly.

You smiled and kissed his temple. “Then we best be going. Destiny’s calling.”

He lifted his head up and stared down at you with such naked affection that your heart stopped for a second or two. “Yes, I suppose it is.”

The Statesman was larger than any craft you were used to piloting. It was, also, much slower than the ship Thor, Valkyrie, and the human Loki had called “Banner” escaped on.

“Ha, that’s the wreckage of Topaz’s ship,” you said as you flew over the surface of Sakaar on the way to the Devil’s Anus. “Maybe that nasty bitch finally kicked the bucket.”

Loki (who was sitting in the copilot’s seat) smiled at the thought. “Now that’s a nice thought, isn’t it?”

You grinned widely, even as the Devil’s Anus loomed closer and closer. “It really is.”

Loki shot you an amused look before he started preparing the ship for travel through the Anus. “Let’s go be big damn heroes, shall we?”

You smirked at him and urged the ship forward. “First time for everything.”

Loki’s smile turned more considering as he made the final preparations. “Yes, I suppose there is.”

Next Chapter (Coming Soon)

If you’d like to be tagged in this series, like this post! Sorry, but responses to this post asking to be tagged will be ignored, so send me an ask or like one of the taglist posts!

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[aresaphrodites]

WIP GAME

Thank you to @tory-b for tagging me in this even though she KNOWS I have way too many WIPs to count... you’re a nightmare and I adore you. 

So since we all know that I’m shit at writing lately, all of these are going to be filed under: I currently have 1 or 2 chapters of these stories written but I don’t know if I’ll ever actually post them so tell me what y’all think and give me encouragement because I’m dying over here:

Blitz: Bughead || A Friday Night Lights AU. Jughead Jones has a game plan. Graduate high school, get a scholarship to Notre Dame, play college ball, go pro, marry Betty Cooper and have five kids. And then he shatters his leg and all of his dreams. 

Ghost of You: Bughead || Getting a job at Jones & Blossom Publishing is Betty Cooper’s dream come true. She loves her coworkers, the stories she gets to read, and the fact that she suddenly has inspiration for her novel. Things she doesn’t love? Jughead Jones, the Publisher, who’s rude and standoffish and makes her feel like an incompetent child. 

Jughead Jones knows what it’s like to have the world in your hands and six feet underneath you in just a matter of moments. Scarred from a tragedy in his past; he’s forgotten what it’s like to love or to even be happy. Can the girl with sunshine in her heart save a man drowning in the darkness? 

How Little You Know: Bughead || Jughead Jones gets adopted by the Lodge family when he’s six years old. Veronica/Jughead adopted sibling AU. When he graduates college, he finds that he’s in love with their childhood friend, Betty Cooper. Only he doesn’t realize it until she’s parading around her new boyfriend that she’s very happy with. Cue Jughead trying to figure out why he’s suddenly hating Betty’s smile, Veronica trying to get her idiot brother to open his eyes, Archie enjoying all the drama, and Betty realizing that you can have all those things you’ve ever wanted. 

Untitled PR Stunt AU: Bughead || Jughead Jones is a name that everyone who’s anyone knows. Son of Oscar winning actor FP Jones, he’s made his way to the top of Hollywood and even has the pretty awards to show for it. What else does he have? A terrible attitude and way too many late nights with girls he doesn’t remember. When his management team has finally had enough, they decide to pull off the biggest PR stunt Jughead’s ever had to do. 

After Betty Cooper’s journalism piece is rejected for her campus’s prestigious newspaper, she feels a sense of loss and puts all her focus on studying to become an elementary teacher instead. When she runs into Jughead Jones--literally, she’s given the chance of a lifetime. With soft blonde hair and even gentler green eyes, Betty Cooper is just the right girl to turn around Jughead’s deteriorating reputation. He can’t stand her and that’s fine. After all, all Betty needs is one good story. 

Untitled High School AU: Jonsa || Sansa Stark doesn’t mean to fall for Jon Targaryen; senior captain of the Winterfell Ravens and her brother’s closest friend. But she does.

Untitled Friends-to-Lovers AU: Jonsa || After Robb makes fun of Jon for not knowing how to flirt with girls, Sansa decides to be the one to show him the ropes. It’s going perfectly; until he actually meets a girl that falls for him. Sansa has to choose between letting Jon be happy with someone else or admitting that she’s been in love with him this whole time. 

who we are (who we’ll become): Bughead || Jughead Jones has it all. Rich, entitled, and arrogant; he may be an Academy Award winner, but he’s no one’s favorite. After he’s busted for his third DUI, he’s forced back to his small hometown of Riverdale in hopes of reconnecting with the man he used to be. A change of scenery, he can handle. But seeing his highschool girlfriend that he left behind years ago? That was something he never planned on.

wild horses (couldn’t drag me away): Bughead, Celebrities AU, drug addiction, reconnecting, hurt/comfort. || “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson.

crazy beautiful: bughead || He’s got everything to lose; she’s got something to prove. Five years after her father killed her sister and then shot himself, Betty Cooper returns to Riverdale High for her senior year. No one wants her around; except for Jughead Jones. Jughead has it all; 4.0 GPA, great friends, a happy family, and a bright future at Stanford. His life is perfect, aside from the fact that his little sister is dying and there’s nothing he can do to save her. 

Betty can’t forgive Jughead for turning his back on her all those years ago, but he’s not going to let history repeat itself again. 

a little town (called riverdale): CORE FOUR AU. || Football star Jason Blossom is the victim of a hit-and-run right before his senior year of high school. Him not being able to ever play football again alters the lives of the core four in ways they never expected. 

Archie Andrews doesn’t know why he can’t stop thinking about Jason Blossom. After all, he never even really knew the guy. But suddenly he finds himself wanting to help the other boy whenever he can; no matter how badly Jason sometimes wishes he would leave him alone. 

Veronica Lodge watches her boyfriend become enamored by someone else, but she can’t bring herself to care. All she cares about is Cheryl Blossom, who isn’t the mean girl she wishes everyone thought she was. 

Betty Cooper can’t sleep. She can’t eat. She can’t think. All she can think of is the night of Reggie’s party, of Jason’s accident, and about the secret she’s been hoarding that could ruin everything. 

Jughead Jones wants to write a groundbreaking story, that’s all he wants to do. He’s never had a conversation with Betty Cooper, but he knows he can’t stand her. She’s the perfect star student who’s always smiling and that everyone loves. When she confides in him after a panic attack, he has to choose between being her friend or using the information she’s just given him to write the story of a lifetime. 

the city of (our broken) dreams: ONE-SHOT. varchie & bughead || Betty marries Archie. Jughead marries Veronica. Betty loves Jughead, Jughead loves Betty. Archie loves Veronica, Veronica loves Archie. Each of them have it all; all of their dreams came true. So they smile at each other and act like the best of friends when they all know the truth. The person standing next to them isn’t the person they love. 

truth runs wild: Choni || Veronica dares Cheryl to kiss Toni. She doesn’t dare Cheryl to fall in love with her, but she does. 

New York, I Love You: Core Four Gossip Girl AU. Betty Cooper tries to figure out how to win the heart of a boy who she isn’t sure even has one while doing her best to keep her family from falling apart after a huge scandal. Veronica Lodge has a huge secret that’s killing her to keep, but telling people would mean she would ruin Archie Andrews’ life. Archie Andrews is coping with the PTSD he has after the events of last year. All he wants is to keep his grades up and get into college on the west coast so he can leave New York behind, once and for all. Jughead Jones just wants to prove to his parents that he isn’t some worthless party animal. He also wants to prove to Betty Cooper that he can be worthy of her love; too bad he isn’t the only one anymore.

Ghost of Girlfriend’s Past AU: Bughead || Jughead Jones has it all. He’s the most sought after photographer in California and he gets to travel to the most exotic places and eat all the best foods. His life couldn’t get any better. Then he goes back to Riverdale for his best friend’s wedding and comes face to face with Betty Cooper, his childhood best friend whose heart he broke years ago. When she makes it apparent that she has no interest in getting to know Jughead now, he realizes that he’s been missing the most important thing this entire time. Of course it takes the help of three ghosts to see that. 

Family Man AU: Bughead || Thirteen years ago, Jughead and Betty said goodbye to each other in a crowded airport. Jughead promised he would come back to her after she pleaded for him to turn away his internship and stay with her in Riverdale. That was the last time he ever saw her. Now, he’s thirty-four and has absolutely no regrets. Until a man shows up and tells him that he’s got it all wrong. When Jughead wakes up the next day, he’s suddenly back in Riverdale, and that’s not all. He’s married to Betty Cooper, has two kids and a dog, drives a minivan, and makes less than 100k a year. How the hell is he supposed to get through this? 

OKAYYYYYY. This is getting long so I’m just going to end it here. These are all the WIPs that I actively write for so... :) 

[chocobroobsession]

I have to get this off my chest

Things are about to get very dark and very serious. I just have to get my thoughts out for my own benefit. Ignore this if you will. I didn’t want to share on my main blog because there are some people I’m not ready to share this story with just yet. I’ll go ahead and warn you of what’s ahead because I don’t want you to get triggered: rape, sexual assault, suicide, depression.

When I was 16, I was raped by my then boyfriend. We were on a date and he indicated that he wanted more from me physically and I panicked. I wasn’t ready for that. I remember saying several things: I’m not ready. I don’t think I want that. Not yet. Not now. 

Well, he did it all anyway. Up until that point, I had always been such a fighter, but in that moment, I froze. I disassociated. I retreated inside of my own head and didn’t even put up a fight. I realize now that it probably lasted only a few minutes, but to me, it was hours. I was so scared. I was in pain. 

Afterwards, I asked him to drive me home where I spent the rest of the night sobbing and trying to clean the feeling of him off of my skin. I rubbed myself raw in the shower the next morning, trying to scrub my entire body with the hottest water I could stand. I puked. I bawled. 

When I went back to school on Monday, I thought that maybe if I could hide it, then no one would have to know. Instead, I was met with harsh stares and whispers. Turns out, he got to school before me and told everyone what happened. Only, he twisted the story. I was the goody-two-shoes who was a secret nymphomaniac. I practically begged him to fuck me. I did such kinky things. 

I was mortified. He lied and yet, everyone believed him. When I tried to suggest otherwise, I was immediately dismissed. My own friends believed him. People I had known since kindergarten. I spent the rest of the week being called things such as slut, whore, skank, and nympho. All of the girls sneered at me while the guys high-fived him and then asked if I would be willing to fuck them too. It was awful. I had never felt so alone in my life. I didn’t want to tell my parents because if my own friends didn’t believe me, why would they? I just knew they’d find a way to blame me for it all anyway.

Then the thought hit me--what if I’m pregnant? I wasn’t on birth control. I had been a virgin and wasn’t sure if/when I would decide to become sexually active. I was only 16 after all. My parents didn’t believe in abortion, so if was pregnant, I knew they would force me to have the baby. Perhaps they wouldn’t make me keep it, but there was no way they’d let me end it. So that’s when I decided that if I showed signs of pregnancy, I was going to kill myself. 

I was at peace with my decision. I had initially thought of killing myself to save myself the embarrassment of the situation, but then I talked myself out of it. I could survive. I could make it to graduation and then never see any of these horrible people again. But could I survive with that monster’s baby inside of me? The answer was no.

Now that the horrible part is out of the way, we can fast forward. Obviously, I didn’t end up pregnant and I didn’t commit suicide. For years, I was plagued by nightmares--reliving the situation over and over again. I had bouts of insomnia followed by frequent sleep paralysis. It was really really rough. I also tried telling myself that perhaps I brought the whole situation on myself. I did go out with him that night. I should have known better. I didn’t remember specifically saying “NO”, so therefore it didn’t count.

Well, now that I’m older and hopefully a bit wiser, I realize that this wasn’t the case. No means no. Not yet means no. I’m not sure means no. No can have many synonyms. 

You can go into a situation expecting sex and then change your mind. You can always change your mind. Your partner has to respect that. Even if that partner is your boyfriend/girlfriend/best friend/fwb/spouse. You are not obligated to have sex. Ever. It’s always ultimately your decision and you always have the right to change your decisions. It’s not final; not set in stone.

It’s been 12 years since that happened to me. Over a decade. And it still haunts me sometimes. But I have grown. I have healed some. I have people who love and support me. I suffered from depression before it happened, and I still do, but now I’m on a good med that helps. I do what works for me.

Recently, I was chatting with a group of friends. One brought up a high profile celebrity sexual assault/rape case and really managed to piss me off with her views. Now, mind you, as an adult, I am trying to be open-minded to other people’s views, but this struck a nerve. 

She was saying that people shouldn’t bring up things that happened decades ago and that they should just “get over themselves”. That didn’t sit well with me. I mean, the past is in the past, but trauma tends to not have an expiration date. I mentioned that as a survivor, I still get haunted by the past occasionally. The petty side of me could totally see why someone would try to ruin someone’s life decades after the fact. If the guy who did this to me was up for a position of power and I had the chance to possibly ruin him, would I do it? I don’t know. The petty side of me would probably jump at the chance. I mean, in a perfect world, people should have to atone for their wrongdoings, and he never did that. 

Don’t get me wrong: I do believe people can change. The tiny optimistic part of me hopes that all people see their mistakes and work to correct them and be better people. Yes, even murderers and rapists. Obviously, that’s not always the case, but a girl can dream.

But when I confronted this friend about how her views might contribute to the toxic rape culture here and how it’s easier said than done when it comes to “getting over” traumatic things, she dismissed me. It hurt. I told her it was so bad back then that I nearly killed myself, and she dismissed that too. She berated me for it. Said that I should have known that nothing is worth killing myself over.

I mean, technically she’s not wrong, but you don’t just say that. To a teenager, life is nothing but school and your friends and your reputation among your peers. When that gets thrown off balance, it does seem like the world is ending. I mean, that is your world. For me personally, depression makes me selfish. All I can focus on is myself. How I hate myself. How other people make me feel awful. How I can’t handle life. So naturally, 16-year-old depressed me couldn’t see how taking my life would affect others. I see now that it wouldn’t have been worth it, but that’s now. That’s 12 years later. This is after seeing how my life improved. Until you experience it, you don’t know what it feels like. And even then, we all experience it differently. Believe me, I don’t wish it on anyone.

So this conversation just got me brooding and thinking. We all experience depression and trauma differently. Some of us are able to “get over it’ quickly and easily, but some of us take a long time to heal. Sometimes, we don’t experience complete healing. We struggle with it the rest of our lives. But no matter how you handle it, YOU ARE VALID. Now, is it healthy for you to dwell on the negativity constantly and let it consume you? Well, no. That may happen at first, but you do need to learn to handle things. Do what you need to do to healthily cope. Seek resources. Go to therapy. Get on medication. Spend time with friends and family. Do all of the above or none of the above. Do what works for you to heal and get on with your life. You may never “get over it”, but you can continue with your life and find a reason to live. 

You may find times in your life that you need to pause. Maybe you need to grieve for a while. Maybe all you need is a helping hand. A shoulder to cry on. An ear to listen. Whatever you need, don’t let people tell you the “right way” to deal. It has taken me years to get to the point where I can mention what happened without full on sobbing. Yes, I still cry, and maybe once I year I have a nightmare, but for me personally, I found ways to heal. I’m scarred, sure, but I’m living life and trying to get better every day. 

I’m not sure where I was going with all of this. I just had a jumble of thoughts in my head that I had to get out. If you stuck around this long, thanks. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here. I can’t promise I’ll be able to help, but I’ll be able to listen. You’re not alone. 

Please, don’t dismiss people who are dealing with grief, trauma, and/or depression. We all deal differently and at different paces. Just be a friend. Be an ally. Speak up for those who can’t or are too afraid to. Because of this toxic rape culture, there are people too afraid to speak up. I know this because I’m one of them. This is my first time publicly admitting anything. But it’s a step in my own healing process. We need more kindness in the world. Just be kind. 

[wyrmguardsecrets]

I found out that my ex is a pedophile, and he was actively behind my back trying to get nudes from an underaged minor that we were guilded with at one time.

Now, cheating was the norm for him. He used Poly as an excuse to be sneaky and do whatever the fuck he wanted with whoever he wanted. He was one of these dudes who thought being pervy was seen by women as an attractive personality quirk.

(I fell into the trap because I have no self esteem whatsoever and it was attention. I've since learned well and grown from this.)

He also used to be really into gross fetishy tropes of playing poc characters and using food related words to describe their skin tone, but this in my opinion is minor compared to everything else he's done.

We've long since been broken up with limited contact but finding out that he was a pedophile on top of everything else, including BRAGGING about tempting married women to cheat on their spouses, absolutely disgusted me.

I felt gross and dirty at the mere thought that I was ever associated with him, let alone in a relationship with him. It made me reflect back and worry about how this might have damaged my reputation with others in the past, despite having long left that server and faction behind me.

Naturally after I found this out, I removed and blocked him from everything but the only time he ever reached out to me after we broke up was when he was horny, which is hilarious because he neglected the fuck out of me through the course of our relationship.

I have seriously contemplated ruining his life. I know his real name, where he lives, ect and where he works. The only thing that's held me back is the fact that I don't have screenshot evidence of him trying to bait that minor into sending him nudes.

I know her by proxy through someone else still but honestly I would be uncomfortable reaching out to her and asking her to dredge that up for me.

So, I've let it lie.

Sorry for the wall, but I really needed to get this off my chest this morning.

.