#and accusing me of horrible things

[musashi]

i JUST realized this might be related to one of my other friends in the mvk fandom suddenly hardblocking me so uh

hey y'all! if you frequent the mvk tag, there is a regular blogger there who i will not name, but who has some sort of pathological attachment/obsession with me. they and i were tumblr mutuals but we were not close. we DM'd twice and had scattered interactions here and there.

they are accusing me of:

being abusive toward them

being otherwise cruel to them

being ableist against disabled folks who are high-support???

sending suibait/having my friends send suibait

probably other things.

EDIT: someone's informed me they're accusing me of posting private stuff from their vent account? the only account i know of theirs is the one we were mutuals on

i can't stress enough that none of this is true. there is no proof of it and if you press this person they will have none. all that happened was some time about a year ago when we were mutuals, i feared they might be vagueblogging about me when i was having depressive episodes and i sent them this message about it:

i was being honest here, but they then turned around and said i was spot on--they were vagueblogging about how badly they wanted me to shut the fuck up, stop whining, etc (paraphrasing, but that was the vibe exactly) every time i needed social support. they have since deleted their message admitting to this. i am so sorry i cannot prove it.

since then multiple mutual friends of ours have unfollowed them because they squat on ym blog and, again, pathologically blog about me. they revel and make posts about "justice" and "karma" whenever i am upset on here. they scream and yell and cry whenever i am happy. they have admitted to wanting to convince their mutuals to abandon me:

again, i can't prove this is about me but i have a lot of testimonials from people who noticed this being in both our circles and can vouch for it. initially i was just going to roll my eyes and move on but i think they might be telling other people i'm some horrible fucking abuser who mistreated them when i wasn't even close enough to them to do so.

anyways, sorry to everyone who tracks the tag! i don't know how to prove that i didn't hurt this person. but... like... if they approach you, please do your best to use best judgement and consider the facts in front of you.

again, i will not be naming them. this is not a callout post. this is a preventative measure, because i am a traumatized wreck and i really cannot deal with things of this nature.

[mcwexlerscigarette]

the way I had a breakdown at work today is crazy... some customer started going off (and I mean going OFF) on me for what was a simple and very easily fixable mistake and like literally threatened to take my job over it because she "personally knew my boss" and anyway my boss found out about it, came to work just to comfort me, and banned the person from the place LOL

[sandpapersnowman]

I had been worried that cutting my dad off and distancing myself from him would put me in a difficult position with his side of the family but I've actually reconnected with a couple family members over how shitty he's been and it turns out I'm not the first one to stop talking to him, he's been blocked by like two of my aunts And my cousin

[tankgotstuckinthecircusgate]

also idk...... soviet vinci i guess

[ultfreakme]

Stanning these three characters is just resigning myself to being permanently in the trenches

this is also how i realize all three of their moms got killed in violent ways by powers that are far out of their control, leaving them broken and questioning all of their life.

LIKE HIS MOM DIED! IT'S A MIRACLE NONE OF THEM EXPLODED THE WORLD.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

me: hermes is a painfully accurate example of how some ways of defending yourself against certain kinds of insidious emotional abuse, gaslighting, ableism, and therapy speak can warp you into a person whose learned helplessness and lack of perspective can result in doing really shitty things, and who passes that abuse along in different forms (hi meteion) + lashes out in disproportionate ways + can be deeply hypocritical.

me: as a disabled person in a society where our systemic mass murder via pressure into government-sanctioned suicide is on the rise, the ancients' society is beyond fucking upsetting to me. i have zero sympathy for anything to do with them pre-apocalypse except for the effects of living in that system.

me: that said, they are a good opportunity to remind oneself that there are children in that burning building; that a society being fucked does not mean they deserve to be wiped out; and that that does not mitigate the harm they do, nor mean that its victims are not allowed to be angry or resist it, including the victims inside it.

me, booboo the fool: oh, this youtube essay about hermes looks interesting--

[damnstan]

also another thing, I think its so annoying when people are mad about how steve treated nancy in s2. he literally tried his best, what do they expect? him to be some kind of expert therapist who knows exactly how to deal with someone who lost her best friend?? he tried to help her in the way he thought was right.

exactly.

he was a great boyfriend in season 2. he was there for her, he supported her in the way he knows.

nancy and steve differ when it comes to dealing with their trauma. nancy wanted revenge, she wanted justice.

steve wanted to keep her and their families safe. his instincts are always to protect. that's a key character trait of him imo.

he has shown amazing growth, he has apologized for so many things which some of them were unnecessary, yet they still chose to focus on his past but God forbid if someone mentions the flaws of any other character.

[skitskatdacat63]

Spoilers, but why is the most heartwrenching scene in Anatomy of a Fall that brief part where she's eating in bed alone, watching the news accuse her of being a murderer and a terrible, deceptive person, digging through her private life and making assumptions. IT MAKES ME SO SAD.

[maareyas]

Are you pro-ai art? Because that one "copyright art style" post you reblogged is in defense of ai art, by an ai "artist"

my feelings for this are more nuanced but in general I'm vehemently against AI "art" in it's current state (I had my art that was A GIFT FOR A FRIEND used in an data set and I hated it) because of the unethical nature of how they generate shit in the first place.

HOWEVER. I think "making art style copyrights" a thing will objectively make things even worse. I've seen petty internet drama over "art style theft" and frankly I'd rather it stay petty internet drama only.

I didn't know the post was by someone who uses AI but I still agree with it.

[borealiszero]

if you think shen jiu is “a rancid, horrible, radioactive level toxic of a man” fine, whatever, but please use an “anti” or “negativity” tag and not his primary tag. thank you!

As per suggestion I have removed it solely bc it might make people uncomfortable.

But also WHAT. DID YOU NOT READ THE DAMN POST HE IS CANONICALLY THAT.

[emelinstriker]

tfw you're just checking on a blog you enjoyed casually looking at after a long while cuz someone reminded you about it, looking for anything new that might catch your eye, only to then read a rant about yourself/your blog/your content with accusations that just prove they glanced over your stuff w/o actually looking at it properly-

again, just about the entire branding/servitude thing and the either baby reader or baby mk that's literally not even more than fun little what-if ideas.

and there was me thinkin i might wanna audition as a va for them if they ever needed help or anythin, but that idea sunk and the amount of respect i had for their own work went down the drain.

now excuse me, i gotta go back to work cuz i just wasted my lunchbreak typing this out.

just like my disclaimer from my old rant post, i'll be deleting anyone's messages if they try to argue with me about this shit again, cuz as stated before, this type of drama is literally giving me genshin twitter vibes.

it ain't my fault if my stuff got recommended to you and you don't like it. i already stopped using the lmk tag as much because of those anons from a while ago.

idm it if peeps have more of a weaker tolerance level towards others wanting to have a good time playing with literal legos in a way they don't like it, but i also don't want people to talk smack about others' work and call it disgusting just because it's not their cup of tea.

let people play with their legos while you play with your own legos, simple as that-

i'll just leave it at that. don't go after anyone involved either as i hate seeing this type of shit get dragged on. especially if it's all, again, opinion-based.

[halodwolf]

im going to make this woman quit. god bless

[deeisace]

.

[nbchannibalheritageposts]

Hannibal Heritage Post

because we all need to be reminded how rad this guy is, okay 

[shadesofmauve]

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[maaarine]

Why are British teenage girls so unhappy? Here’s the answer (Caitlin Moran, The Times, Sep 13 2024)

"The report, by the Children’s Society, found that British 15-year-old girls are the most unhappy in Europe.

British girls aged 10-15 are “significantly less happy” with their life, appearance, family and school than the average boy — and their happiness is still declining.

Boys’ life satisfaction, meanwhile, remains broadly stable. (…)

But I still didn’t have an “aha!” moment about why this so disproportionately affects girls until… I talked to some teenage girls.

It was at a party, and I went to vape with them on the patio. Because I take my nicotine like children do.

“Duh — it’s the boys,” one said when I brought it up, as all the others agreed.

“The boys?” I asked.

My last book, What About Men?, had been all about how much boys struggle these days: their loneliness; their suicide rates. I’d spent the past year feeling very sympathetic towards boys.

“Yeah, well, who do you think they’re taking out their unhappiness on? It’s us,” another girl said.

“One boy at school used to draw a picture every day of how ugly I was,” a third girl said. “Every day for two years.”

“They’ve all got ‘Rate The Girls’ polls on their WhatsApps,” the first said. “They mark you down for weight gain, haircuts, what you say.”

“But then, if you’re hot, it’s just as bad, in a different way, because they’ll be talking about how they want to f*** you.”

The girls discussed coping techniques. Bad news: none of them worked.

“The only way you can stop them is if you become ‘one of the boys’ and hang out with them. But then,” the second girl said with a sigh, “all the other girls call you a slut. Because you’ve gone over to the boys’ side.”

“Surely it’s not all the boys?” I said. “There must be some nice boys?”

“Oh, yeah,” one girl said. “But they keep their heads down. Because… well, look.”

She showed me the Instagram account of her friend. Under every picture she posted of herself — smiling in a new dress; with her dog — dozens of anonymous accounts had replied with the most rank abuse.

“Fat.” “Slut.” “You gonna try and kill yourself again, for attention?”

“They’re all boys from her school,” she said. “And look, this one boy tried to defend her.”

I saw a series of messages from a brave teenage boy, posting things like, “You’re all big men, leaving these replies under anonymous accounts.”

As I could see, this boy immediately became a target too. Mainly accusations that he was “white knighting” this girl: “You wanna f*** her, bro?”

“So,” I asked, “you don’t think it’s social media pressure to be beautiful, or the economy, that’s making girls so sad?”

“Well, yeah, them too,” the first girl said. “But, Monday-Friday, 9-3, I’m not on social media. I’m not… in the economy. I’m just with these boys. And no one talks about how horrible they are.”

I thought about another recent report, showing a 30 per cent ideological gap between Gen Z men, who are increasingly conservative, and Gen Z women, who are increasingly progressive.

I thought about Andrew Tate, who has nine million mostly young male followers — and faces human trafficking charges, which he denies.

And I thought: maybe these girls are on to something. Maybe more people need to vape with teenage girls and ask them for the school gossip."