#and a couple of other small assignments that just add on to everything

[bitterpngs]

just fuck everything i can’t get anything done

[leeechin]

☆ he got that in him

shy bf jungwon ! (18+) 🪽 🦢 ☀️ 🫧

a/n: i feel like this isn't rlly jungwon :( !! but it's all just fiction 🙄 and i just love this man sooo much. please do let me know if there are typos! i do go over before i publish but i sometimes miss it 😢 reqs are open !! don't be afraid to ask :)

✧ pairing: idol!jungwon x influencer!reader + warnings: smut with plot YAYYY. dom!jungwon x subfem!reader, unprotected sex (don't do that), jungwon hits it from the back lol, riding, ass slapping, degradation (use of the words whore, slut, etc), pet names (baby, won, wonnie, etc), size kink, orgasm denial (so mean jungwon), rough sex, jungwon is such a shy guy wrapped around your finger in public, but is such a freak in bed it’s insane.

word count: [2.8K]

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you quite literally needed jungwon every second in your life. your attachment to him was so strong it was sometimes concerning.

"are you sure you don't want to just go with me in my car?" your boyfriend asks, walking out of your bathroom with a towel wrapped around his lower waist.

you didn't respond but instead stared at the muscles on his stomach, watching how his lower abdomen sucked in a little bit and you were so entranced by the sight infront of you, mouth watering slightly. your whole world stopped for a bit to just simply admire yang jungwon.

you're finishing up some assignments for class. you decided that you're joining jungwon at his group's house gathering an hour or two later than the time he's arriving. you didn't have to worry about missing out too much, the gathering will be going on for a while.

it was jake who decided to throw a mini gathering, including all of the members, and a few other people including you. the gathering including your favorite, an outdoor barbecue and bonfire.

"yeah won." you frown, "have to finish this thesis or else professor jeong will not give me the end of it." scoffing at the mention of your professor. you turn around and your eyes nearly pop out of your socket at what you see. "actually.. are you sure we even have to go..?" you tease, now standing infront of your boyfriend and teasing the sides of the towel that could be down with one small tug, wanting to pull it off your boyfriend.

"quit it perv!" jungwon jokes, "you'll get what's under this towel later tonight." he winks, wrapping a hand around your waist to give you a kiss, you whined when he pulled his soft lips away. "now be a good girl and finish your assignments, i'll see you there in couple hours." patting the back off your ass playfully. going to the closet and picking out an outfit.

you curiously watch your boyfriend style his hair, focus completely shifted from the work you had left with school. "don't you have some assignments to finish?" eyebrows raising at your eyes not blinking once.

"yeahyeah your right." you respond a little flustered, a slight tint flowing on your cheeks. jungwon walks over to your desk, placing a kiss on the top of your head. "see you later baby." then he walked out of your room.

you sigh, already missing the presence of your jungwon. it takes another hour and a half before you're finished with all of your assignments for the week. closing your laptop aggressively, victory filling in your head as you don't have to worry about completing your work this weekend.

you're quick to change out of jungwon's t-shirt, putting on a pair of dark green cargo shorts that hugged your thighs perfectly, and a simple white baby tee with the brands cute logo on the back. grabbing your keys on the counter by the door, dashing out the door, to your car. you had a feeling that you wouldn't be returning home tonight, instead staying over at enhypen's house.

"what's that look on your face jungwon? missing y/n huh?" jake teases him. "she's got him wrapped around her finger! see how she always initiates everything!" jay adds on. "she probably controls ALL the shit that goes on in bed!" someone else says.

"i am NOT talking to you guys about my bed activities." the members laughing at jungwon's quick defense. knowing they're right, atleast they think so.

arriving at the house, you might've underestimated the weather, feeling a little bit cold as you welcomed yourself in, kicking your shoes off at the entrance, carrying them with you to the backyard to put them on again.

"look who's here! we were just talking about you!" ni-ki greets you. "nothing bad i hope." you respond, "don't worry it wasn't anything bad! just talked about how you've practically got jungwon wrapped around your finger." sunoo says, maybe he ran his mouth a little too much, sunghoon glaring at him as sunoo placed both of his hands over his mouth.

you laugh in response to that, "jungwon's just such a loving boyfriend. i really hit the jackpot with this one." beaming at jungwon, you were being held with one arm around your waist. jay started the barbecue and the rest of the members went to help with setting up everything.

jungwon noticed your body slightly shivering. "are you cold sweetheart?" "mm, just a little bit" murmuring that as a reply. your boyfriend taking off his sweatshirt that he was wearing and putting it on you. "i'm not that cold anyways. gotta go help set up stuff, karina's by the pool chairs." he gives you a kiss on your cheek.

"nice arms" you tease, moving one of your hands to squeeze his now bare biceps. you were definitely going to thank heesung later for urging jungwon to frequent the gym more. that white t-shirt was hugging all the right parts of jungwon's upper half.

"not right now baby." he speaks in a low voice to you, "can't help it you look so hot right now." whining and looking up to your boyfriend. jungwon leans down to give you a quick kiss on your lips. karina's waving over to you as you walk towards the poolside, giving a quick turn to see your boyfriend immediately jump in to help with setting up the table.

"girl you have been oogling and staring at your boyfriend for the past five minutes now, without saying anything!" karina says, waving her hand in front of you, making you finally blink again for the first time in a few minutes. "seriously thank your brother for me. he's been taking jungwon to the gym more often." your best friend just scoffs at you in amusement.

"dude, y/n has not looked one second away from you." sunghoon points out, nudging jungwon with his elbow. the members snicker at jungwon's flustered reaction, going back to setting up the table.

"jungwon!" you call out, jungwon jumps at the sudden sound of your voice. "yeah babe what's up!" he exclaims, nearly stuttering at every word. "were you guys bullying my boyfriend." you frown at his fellow members, "because he only gets like this when someone's been teasing him."

"no definitely did NOT!"

"sure, sure." you roll your eyes jokingly, turning to jungwon with a mischievous glint. now he knew that you were up to something.

"won, i think i left something in your room when i was staying with you a few days ago, can i go look for it?" "yeah i'll help you find it pretty." the other members not noticing you and jungwon disappearing, too focused on the food grilling on the barbecue and setting up the table.

walking into the house, your eyes are set on the entrance of jungwon's room, looking behind you and throwing a smirk at jungwon, quickening your pace to his room door. but you felt yourself being tugged into the bathroom.

"do you enjoy teasing me infront of everybody?" he growls, using a hand to hold both your cheeks and turn you to face the bathroom mirror infront of the counter, his other hand gripping your asscheek. you don't respond, eager for jungwon to bend you over the counter and just fuck the shit out of you.

"i asked you a question baby." jungwon says, staring directly at you on the mirror. hand gripping your asscheek a little tighter. you whine and push your hips back, feeling his bulge rub against your clothed ass, shorts rising up and you continued your movements. "need you so bad wonnie please." your boyfriend laughs at your neediness. using both of his hands to grip your waist and hold you in place.

"i don't know sweetheart. you've been teasing the fuck out of me since you've got here." jungwon murmurs, unbuttoning your cargos shorts, sliding your panties down to your knees and moving two of his digits to collect your wetness. "please jungwon! i can't help it that you feel so good everytime!" you babble attempting to wiggle your hips side to side. jungwon finds you so desperate for him to be so amusing.

"you enjoy being a needy whore for me don't you? the way you're dripping around my fingers show me that you do." humiliation tints on your face as you look at yourself on the mirror. it's thrown away when you feel two of jungwon's digits enter you all of a sudden.

you let out a gasp at the intrusion, the stretch of his two fingers hitting you so deep as jungwon already sets a relentless pace, his other hand moving up to push your hair to the side, trailing soft kisses on your exposed collarbone.

"oh shit wonnie, feels so good!" you moan, shutting your eyes as you revel in the feeling of jungwon's fingers working wonders deep inside your cunt. your small noises spurring jungwon to add a third finger.

the feeling of him scissoring and hitting your g spot repeatedly made the pleasure feel so overwhelming. "you gonna close baby?" jungwon noticing the way your pussy tighten and swirled around his fingers. in response, you nodded.

feeling jungwon's pace fasten, your pussy clenches around his digits so tightly, you felt that knot in your stomach about to be undone, but wait… that feeling fades when jungwon pulls his fingers out abruptly, laughing at your pathetic attempt to grind back against him.

"two more hours until i fuck the absolute shit out of you." your eyes widen as you whine at your boyfriend's words. jungwon helped you pull your panties back up, along with your cargo shorts. he gives your ass a playful smack, making you turn around and throw a pout at him.

"you're so mean." your lips curl into a frown looking at the way jungwon has no remorse.

. ✦ · .

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀˚ ⊹ ˚

⠀⠀ ⊹

the sounds of your and jungwon's lips smacking against each other filled the room. everyone else being long asleep, as it was pretty late in the night and the gathering ending a couple hours ago.

all that was left on your was your bra, thin material barely holding together your tits that jungwon adored and worshipped so much. the straps slid off your shoulders, being pulled down and showing your lucious tits. with your bra not even being properly off, jungwon's hands grabbing at your boobs, nipples in between his fingers as he twisted and fondled at them.

you let out low sighs of pleasure, feeling like jelly from your standing position, you would've fell down if it wasn't for jungwon's tight hold. "fuck baby, i would have you blow me right now but i need to fuck that sweet pussy of yours." your boyfriend manhandles you onto your front, onto the bed.

"arch that back for me pretty." jungwon says cursing at the slight of your slick dripping out of your spent pussy, down your legs. if only his fellow members knew he had you wrapped around his finger like this. the way you begged for him to fill you up with his thick cock that sent you into an overdrive of pleasure, fat tears streaming down your face as you go thru an intense orgasm.

and you didn't care to conceal or cover your sounds. jungwon completely forgot about that.. only focused on ruining you tonight.

but before all of this, he gave you a prior orgasm by eating you out. the sight of your needy hole throbbing, practically looking like it was ready to pull his cock in made jungwon let out a long groan.

loosing all of his patience to tease you any further. jungwon's hands are on the side of your hips guiding you to the position. you turn your head, tears slightly fogging your vision, seeing how jungwon slid off his boxers and gave his cock a few harsh strokes, you admired the veins that were decorated along his length, his pre-cum oozing out of his mushroom tip. you were entranced by the sight, mouth watering as you watch jungwon align his tip with your entrance.

circling his tip around your wetness, collecting it on his tip to use as lube. he pushes into you, one hand on your hip, and the other pushing your face into the pillow to try to suppress your loud shrieks and moans of his name. it didn't really help much because the walls were quite thin.. and the sounds of his hips smacking against the the soft plush skin of your ass echoing around the room.

you really tried to contain your sounds, hips pushing back to feel more of jungwon's cock stuffed deep into you. a hard smack lands on your left ass cheek. "naughty girl, is this not enough for you?" you mouth shapes into an 'o' as you felt jungwon increase his pace, relentless strokes hitting all parts of your body so so good.

"oh shit." you groan, eyes rolling head spinning at the sensation. it was nearly impossible with the speed jungwon's cock kept sliding in and out of you. "such a fucking pretty cockslut for me." jungwon groans, the feeling of your walls tightening around him from his words. he moves his hands to spread your asscheeks to see the way your tight walls you envelop his dick over and over again.

you let out a particularly loud moan when you feel your orgasm approaching, jungwon stopping his movements briefly to pull your head up, "shush baby, you don't want everyone hearing you like the cockwhore you are do you?"

"ngh no! too good wonnie i'm close pleaseplease?" you beg, attempting to move your hips back, jungwon's grip was too tight, just simply laughing at your state. he goes back to his moment, one hand pushing your face into the pillows, but the sounds were still quite loud, your muffled moans only spurred jungwon on more.

you lift your face up from the pillow telling jungwon that you're close, he knows by the way your body is tensing up, cunt clenching around his length so impossibly tight.

his fingers moving to your clit and rubbing your pearl as your release approaches, the coil in your stomach finally snapping around jungwon as you drop your body back onto the mattress, arms giving out and just leaving your whole upper body to rest on the sheets.

a laugh falls out of jungwon's mouth as he look at the state of you, slowing down his pace as he finishes inside of you, pulling out and seeing his cum dripping down the insides of your thighs. patting your ass softly, jungwon leans over you mumbling against your ear, "just one more pretty. i want you to ride me."

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀˚ ⊹ ˚

"oh shit" you moan as jungwon finally bottoms out in you, your walls flutter around his walls causing him to throw his head back and groan at the feeling of you. hands placed on both of your hips in a tight grip, moving you up and down on his cock. another moan escapes your lips when one of his hands move to slap one of your ass cheeks, his hand easing the sight pain afterwards. "ride me like you mean it pretty."

jungwon's hands leaving your hips and rests behind his head, enjoying the sight in front of you, your eyebrows furrowed as you try to find a good pace, soft moans of his name repeating like a prayer over and over, it was all just too good.

finally finding a good pace, you feel tired as your pace slows, jungwon groans at the feeling of his cock practically splitting you open. finally giving you some help and moving his hands back to your hips as he moves you up and down.

"mmph jungwon! m' close!" your hands find placement on both sides of his shoulders, velvety walls tightening around his length again.

"come for me y/n." was all it took for you as your eyes rolled back, nails digging into his shoulder as jungwon finishes at the same time as you, stilling his movements and painting your walls white.

⠀⠀ ⊹

your body is sprawled on the sheets, eyes half lidded as your boyfriend brings you up to help you redress yourself in a new set of clothes.

"you're insane." you sigh, knowing the next morning that your legs will be limp. jungwon laughs at you, giving you a small kiss and lays himself beside you.

as the morning comes, jungwon greets the other members a good morning, but an awkward silence is met. jungwon raises and eyebrow at the silence and the way his fellow members looked at him.

"holy shit jungwon! we didn't know you got that in you!"

[airybcby]

HIYAA i really wanted to send a request for your more than married event 😛 can i request Karasu and 🍑🍦thank you xx

HEYYY!! ofc !

a karasu tabito peachy ice cream :)

જ⁀♡⊹｡° you can hear it in the silence

♡ a/n — for my more than a married couple event!

♡ content — karasu tabito x gn! reader, gn! reader, best friends to lovers, nickname like 'babe' used (once), they are the silliest billies, flirting, oblivious friends to lovers

♡ synopsis — karasu tobito had always just been your best friend, but could this program change that?

When you stepped into the apartment for the marriage simulation, the last person you expected to see lounging on the couch was Karasu Tabito.

He looked up from his phone, his signature smirk appearing the moment he saw you. “Well, well, well. Look who’s my lucky partner.”

You blinked, caught off guard. “Tabito? You’re in this program?”

“Surprised?” he teased, leaning back like he owned the place. “What can I say? I thought I’d add ‘model husband’ to my list of talents.”

You rolled your eyes, setting your bag down. “Yeah, that’s a real stretch.”

He laughed, the sound warm and familiar. It was so him—effortlessly charming, with just a hint of mischief.

You and Karasu had been friends for years, ever since middle school. He was the kind of person who lit up every room he walked into, his confidence and humor making him impossible to ignore.

But while most people saw only his cocky, carefree exterior, you knew there was more to him than that. You’d seen him at his lowest, too—nursing injuries, doubting himself, pushing harder than anyone else to chase his dream.

And now, here you were, thrown into a “marriage” with him.

“What are the odds?” he said, still grinning as you unpacked.

“Apparently higher than I thought,” you muttered, trying not to think too hard about how small the apartment was—or how close you’d be to him for the next few weeks.

At first, it wasn’t much different from hanging out as friends.

Karasu made it easy, cracking jokes and treating the whole thing like some elaborate prank. “You know,” he said one evening while you cooked dinner, “we could totally mess with the other couples. Pretend we’re, like, madly in love or something. Really sell it.”

You snorted. “You think you can pull that off?”

He gasped, clutching his chest like you’d wounded him. “I’m offended. I’m very convincing.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Prove it.”

Without missing a beat, he turned to you, his expression shifting into something softer, more serious. “Babe,” he said, his voice low and intimate. “You’re the only one for me.”

You froze, heat rushing to your face. “Okay, stop,” you said, shoving him lightly.

He laughed, but there was a flicker of something in his eyes that you couldn’t quite place.

As the days went on, the lines between “pretend” and “real” started to blur.

It was in the little things—how he always made sure your coffee was exactly how you liked it, or how he stayed up late to help you with the program’s assignments, even when he didn’t have to.

And then there were the moments you couldn’t ignore, like the way his gaze lingered on you just a little too long, or how his teasing felt less like a joke and more like a test.

You tried to brush it off. After all, this was Karasu. He flirted with everyone.

But then one night, everything changed.

It was late, and the two of you were sitting on the couch, the glow of the TV casting soft shadows across the room.

“I’m glad it’s you,” he said suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence.

You turned to him, confused. “What?”

He shrugged, not meeting your eyes. “This whole thing. I’m glad it’s with you.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “Tabito…”

“I’m serious,” he said, his voice quieter than usual. “I know I act like an idiot sometimes, but…you mean a lot to me. More than I probably let on.”

You stared at him, your chest tightening. “Why are you telling me this now?”

He laughed softly, running a hand through his hair. “Because I’m tired of pretending it’s not true. And because I’m an idiot who doesn’t want to lose his best friend without at least trying.”

“Trying what?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He finally looked at you, his dark eyes filled with something raw and unguarded. “This. Us. Whatever this could be.”

You kissed him first.

It wasn’t planned, and it definitely wasn’t part of the simulation. But the moment your lips met, everything else faded away—the program, the rules, the fear of ruining your friendship.

It was just you in this moment, save for the little point total displayed in your living room going up by 10 points.

For the first time, you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, this could work.

The program ended a week later, and you both stood outside the apartment, staring at the door as if crossing that threshold would change everything.

“So,” he said, slipping his hands into his pockets. “What now?”

You smiled, your heart swelling with hope. ���Now we figure it out.”

He grinned, his usual confidence returning. “Good. Because I’m not letting you get rid of me that easily.”

You laughed, feeling lighter than you had in weeks.

Whatever came next, you knew you’d face it together.

GOD I LOVE HIM

i hope you liked it!

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!

[hiddenhearthwitch]

📚 Small Intro To Polytheism📚

One of the most frequent asks I receive is how and where to get started when it comes to polytheism. This is a fairly broad subject and I’ll try to be as general as I can for advice but I will include specific references for Norse polytheists as that’s my shit. This information can be used to help you find a pantheon or to help you pick deities to work with it. If you’d like to use it to pick a patron deity that’s super, if you want to worship 20 gods and not have a patron deity that’s cool too. You do you dude. Please keep in mind this is all reflective of my research and personal practice. 🌻

Picking A Pantheon/Deity

This really boils down to personal preference. You’ll read a lot of posts and books that tell you many different ways and it’s entirely up to you because it is your practice.  That being said, there’s a couple of different ways to go about it. 

Research! This is one of my favorite ways to delve in. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with reading the stories of multiple pantheons and picking on that calls to you. You can also talk to other devotees and see what they have to say about deities and their religions. It is important to keep in mind that some religions are closed so please do proper research!

For example, I wasn’t originally a Norse pagan. I read some stories and thought the Hellenic pantheon would best suit me. I reached out to Eros for a while but after feeling no real connection to the pantheon I continued my research! After reading up on the Norse pantheon I decided to reach out to them out. Obviously, I fucking loved it because here I am. Point being, you can pick a pantheon based on research and not some divine message or whatever. You are also more than welcome to try out a religion, decide it doesn’t suit you, and move on. 

Divination! You can use runes, a pendulum, tarot, etc.This can go a few different ways. You can write pantheon/deity names on separate pieces of paper, mix them up, and place them face down then ask the pendulum to pick. You can assign a deity/pantheon to each suit of cards or major arcana card or even do the same thing with runes. 

For example, this is how I found a devotion to Frigg and Hel. I asked if there were any deities who were interested in working with me and pulled the runes Hagalaz and Berkana which read as Hel and Frigg to me. I followed up with tarot cards and pulled Death(Hel) plus the Queen of Pentacles(Frigg).

Asking/waiting for a sign. This isn’t something I’ve personally done so I don’t have much to say on the subject. You can go about meditating, praying, doing a ritual, or whatever and essentially wait for a sign after. It can come via a dream, something you experience, symbols you see in your daily life, it’s pretty much up to your intuition to decipher it. If anyone has information they’d like me to add in here please let me know!

If there’s a god you’re curious about and don’t want to do any of the above it’s totally cool to just reach out and ask if they want to work with you. 

Idk How To Research

Same, tbh my keyword search game is weak. Anyways, good portion of us are looking up dead religions with little reliable resources. To give those curious about the Norse an easy head start here’s a compiled list of  books by yours truly(click me!!) . It’s important to take everything with a grain a salt of salt when doing research. In my experience a lot of the retold Norse sagas have been Christianized or written under heavy Wiccan influences. It’s a good idea to do research on the author before reading one of their books.

Other blogs! There are tons of great witches and pagans on tumblr that have information waiting for you. 💗 You can search their blog/tags for good references for books, websites, podcasts, etc. Plus lots of blogs are open to answer asks. If you don’t know where to start for searching it’s best to try things based around your interest like: “norse polytheist”, “hellenic witch”, “gaelic polytheism”, etc.

Media! How lucky are we that we live in the age of technology? Knowledge is right at our fingertips! There are countless documentaries, podcasts, and audiobooks on youtube full of information for different cultures and religions. I’d personally recommend almost anything by BBC, Myths & Legends, and World Mythology!

Books! I love starting on goodreads to find good books and trust worthy authors. They’ve had almost every book I looked up with bunches of different reviews so you can get varying perspectives. Check out your local library as well! A lot of city libraries have online databases now of all of their books so you can “check it out” online and read the PDF(personal fave). 

Feeling Lost Still?

That’s completely reasonable and your feelings are more than valid. It can be overwhelming and lot of information to soak up. Just do your best and take it at your own pace, there’s no rush to find a deity or pantheon. 💞 Below are a few other general concerns I hear a lot that I was hoping to address.

“I’m leaving a monotheistic(Christian, Catholic, Jewish, etc) religion and it’s giving me anxiety.” This is entirely common and almost expected in my opinion. I was raised Roman Catholic and my first year to two looking into polytheism riddled me with anxiety. I was constantly concerned that god would smite me down or I’d face an eternity in hell for worshiping false gods. While I can’t speak for everyone that fear was entirely erased for me when I found my gods. I’ve never felt so safe and strong and hopefully with time you can find the same in your gods!

It’s okay to want to learn more or to seek something more. I can’t tell you how to handle your anxiety but please know you’re not alone in that fear. There’s whole communities out there willing to support you and help you find your safe space(including me)!

“What’s UPG?” You’ll see a lot of posts, mine included, that mention UPG - UPG is Unverified Personal Gnosis. This is essentially someone’s personal thoughts and beliefs about a deity. For example, I associate Sif with hazelnuts. There’s nothing in the lore or any book that says that she likes hazelnuts; that’s just a personal opinion(aka a UPG).

“How do I reach out to the gods?” I have a lot of information on my blog about this topic although a lot of it is Norse specific. You can check out my beginner polytheist tag here and my beginner norse post/ask here.

Altar! This is my go to typically. Altars aren’t limited to the cookie cutter image that comes to mind(no hate though I have a few); one thing you can make a side blog dedicated to your pantheon/deity, make a small one in a tin can, or even make one in a video game like Minecraft or some shit. You can be as creative or as to the book as you want. It’s up to you.

Prayer! You can totally just sit down and be like, “Hey man wanna work on some shit together?”. While I’m not 100% that all gods would be down with you being that casual it’s still something you can try.😂 You can reach out to them by sitting down in a quiet space and meditating into prayer, praying in the car or in the shower, or just pray at the altar you set up if you did. Again, I can not reiterate this enough, it’s your practice, reach out to them as you please.

Do something personal! This is more like devotional work in my opinion. Let’s say you knit and you want to reach out to a creative or domestic deity, you can knit something as a devotional act to them and as a way to reach out. For example I pick up litter in honor of the Vanir and Jörð, or I play Skyrim for Thor and Týr.

Most importantly just be honest and up front with the god that you’re reaching out too. Considering that statement be honest with yourself as well. There’s no point going into a relationship with a god if you can’t be upfront, it’ll end up in nothing but grief.

“Can deities reach out through gods/signs?” They totally can. However, it is up to you and your intuition if a deity has and it’s not likely another witch will decipher that for you. Sounds, experiences, images, all have different meanings to each of us - they may show you something that’s very personal to you but would be mundane to someone else. Trust your instincts. However, please remember that not everything is magical, sometimes a raven is just a raven and not Odin.

✨Take everything you learn with a grain of salt. Including this post.✨

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[velaenaa]

strawberry chocolate parfait \ nanami kento x reader (ch.1)

word count: 1.1k tags: slight slow burn, pining, romance, fluff, added as i go! setting: you are a worker at a bakery that nanami kento frequents ♡ authors note: hello ^_^ i hope you are doing wonderful! this is my first time writing for nanami. pls enjoy! chapter: 1/? <next>

Chapter 1 - Vanilla Cake

‘Does this guy need help….?��

‘He’s staring real hard at the bread…. Omg- is it ugly? Aw hell- I made that this morning…’ 

Your thoughts were cut off by the towering figure of a man, with two loaves of baguette in one hand and one container of cake, that happened to be your favorites, in the other. You smile up at him, “Will this be everything?” He gives a stiff nod, locking his eyes with yours, then you giggled; “Then.. I guess I'll bag-uette up for you..” 

No? No reaction..Damn, tough crowd.. 

He thanks you and you bid him farewell and to come back soon. You could’ve sworn he almost smiled… maybe that was a look of irritation..?

After he leaves eyesight, You make haste by sitting down behind the counter, face flushed with embarrassment and agony. It made you cringe. Why would you say that? Your coworker giggled at you, making sure to add salt to the wound, “You tried.. That’s all it matters.” she gives you a head pat and continues,  “He’s a regular here. He’s probably gonna come back in another couple of hours on his way home or something.”

“Then how come I’ve not seen him before?”

“Dunno.. He’s been away for a couple months now.” 

“What’s his name?”

“You should ask when he comes back.”

“Isn’t that weird?”

“Oh but asking some other random person, who doesn’t know him at all, by the way, isn’t weird?”

She has a point.

You looked down at your phone and idly texted your friend Nobara about your day and fashion related topics. 

You met when Nobara came down to the bakery to get some pastries for her boyfriend. You hit it off right away due to shared interests, albeit you being 7 years older. Nobara enjoyed having an older sister with an affinity for style, love for shopping, and interest in all the cool girl stuff that Maki wouldn’t normally talk to her about. 

Right now you two are discussing weekend plans. Nobara and her boyfriend Yuji, along with Megumi, and their teacher Gojo were going to a karaoke room cause it had been a while since Gojo had gone out with his students. He was stuck on oversea assignments for the past couple of weeks and he dearly misses them, or so he says. As always, you had been invited and of course you said yes! 

You are very fond of the kids and Gojo. The 3 of them reminded you of your siblings back home, and well- Gojo is Gojo. Plus, if you had declined, Gojo would pester you non-stop. 

-

After a mini rush, you sit  down, tired, ready to bite down into your sandwich, when on queue, the door swings open, revealing the tall blonde man, taking his glasses off as his eyes pierce you again. You wave at him and he just nods. You get a bag ready as the man collects another slice of the same cake he had bought earlier. He also got another dessert, this time, a small vanilla custard tart w/ fruits on top, made by yours truly. He comes up to the counter, and you stiffen up  in shyness, “Is this everything for you?”

The man looked tired, but he let out a soft, yet stern ‘yes.’

As you rang up his order you looked back up to him, your lips curling into a small grin, “How was work?” This caught them both off guard, “Oh- I didn’t- I didn’t mean to assume-” I mean.. Unless this guy enjoys walking around in a whole business suit for funsies.

He actually lets out a chuckle, “It’s okay. It was a busy day.” 

You both stayed silent for a second before he asked in return, “How was your day, miss?” This made you feel warm and your smile only got bigger, “It was wonderful! I got to serve a lot of customers. They bought their kids in. It was so fun.”

‘And cause you came into the shop twice.’

“Ah sorry.. I’m trailing. I didn’t mean to ramble- you must be dying to get home.”

‘No, I could get used to listening to you.’  is what he wanted to say;

Instead he lets out a relieved sigh, “It’s alright. I’m glad you had a good day today.” This caused your cheeks to tint red. Dying from embarrassment because you just knew that your coworkers were listening in, she redirects the topic, and points at the cake, “Do you like those?” He nods again, “They’re the best I’ve ever had. Compliment the baker for me.” Oh your heart, you could hear it beating so hard from your chest. 

You do a mental fist pump before clapping your hands with glee, “Oh I’m so glad you liked them!” You go around the counter and grab another slice just for him. You stared up at him in absolute awe, because behind the counter was elevated by at least a foot. 

This man was tall, as hell. 

He just looks down at you eyeing your move. You push the cake towards him even harder, “This one is on the house!” He tilts his head in question. You double down and nod your head, affirming the choice. He grabs hold of the cake with one hand, “Thank you. I appreciate that.”

‘Ask for her name Nanami’ He repeats to himself in his head

“What is your name?” She beats him to the punch. 

‘Have you lost your touch?’-- “Nanami”

“I really like your name. It’s beautiful! My name is Y/N.”

‘Y/N, huh.. What a nice name..’

You give him his bag as he recollects his thoughts, “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve got to get going. Work” You shoot him one last smile before waving him off, “Thank you for coming! It was nice to meet you! Don’t work too hard!”

An hour goes by and it's time for the bakery to close for the night. You turn the lights off as the ladies load up the delivery car with food that wasn’t sold for the day so they could give it to the local kitchens and homeless shelters. You bid your coworkers farewell before hopping into your car and collecting yourself, before driving home.

After you get home you jump into bed, eager to text Nobara. 

[Txt]  Y/N - “I met such a cute guy today!”

A second later there’s an audio msg from her of Gojo;

[Voice Recording] “Wahh?! Y/N I wasn’t there today!”  in a whiny bit.

You laugh as Nobara actually sends a text;

[Txt] Nobara - “Tell me all about it when you come to karaoke… matter of fact, he should come!”

But you just met.. How are you going to pull that off… and will he even want to go is the better question… what if he thinks you’re weird … oh lord… so many overthinking possibilities.. Ok but what if he actually says yes?

[Txt] Y/N- “Are you sure?”

[Txt] Nobara  - “Yeah! Gojo-sensei is paying anyway.”

[theemporium]

[3.3k] after a conversation with steve leaves him haunted with ideas, eddie takes it upon himself to create the perfect circumstances to live out his car sex fantasy. (smut)

based off this request

.

In all fairness, the date wasn’t technically based on a lie. 

Between class assignments, after-school jobs and Eddie working on the latest campaign before he officially handed the club off to the younger boys, there hadn’t been much time for you two to just spend it…together. 

Sure, there were the odd nights you’d head over to the trailer park or he would head over to your house, but neither of you ever stayed up late enough to enjoy the time together. Nine out of ten times, you’d both be so caught up with your own things that the first time you really got a moment alone from everything would be the minutes before you passed out in bed. 

So, the idea of a random, impromptu date at the drive-in movie theatre just outside of town seemed like the perfect night you both needed after weeks of nothing. A sweet, innocent night shared together watching some trashy old movie with snacks and drinks you picked up from the 7/11 on the way—and totally nothing to do with the fantasy that had been playing over and over in his head for the last few weeks. 

Honestly, it had been Steve’s fault. 

He had been hanging around Family Video a couple of weeks ago when the topic was brought up. Just a simple back and forth of the best and worst places to have sex whilst Steve sorted through the x-rated videos the store had to offer. They had been debating on whether shower sex was really worth the risk or not when Steve brought it up. 

“Okay but nothing beats the back of a car,” he had commented casually, not seeming to notice the way Eddie perked up in interest. 

“Huh?”

“Like, when you’re fooling around with a girl and then she climbs into the back with that look on her face? It’s hot,” Steve said with a shrug of his shoulders. “It’s hot in the front seat too, but it’s a little cramped up there.” 

Eddie didn’t say anything in response because, truly, he couldn’t. He couldn’t put his two cents into the conversation, he couldn’t add in any opinions because it was never something he ever experienced. 

There had been a few hookups in the back of the van, but that was different. The back of the van was spacious and he often had pillows and blankets down to make it a little nicer. The last time he drove a car was back when Wayne was teaching him, and even then, it only took a few weeks before he got his licence. And he didn’t drive anything again until he saved up for the van, did a little work on her and had her as his very own ever since. 

Yet, there was a small part of Eddie that couldn’t help but feel like he was missing out. As Steve continued to ramble on, that pit in his stomach grew and grew into something quite like envy. 

He wanted that. He wanted the silly giggles and breathless moans when he fucked some girl in the backseat of a car. He wanted the heated windows, the bodies pressed together and the clothes abandoned on the car floor. He wanted that. 

He wanted that with you, with his pretty girl.

But he never said that to Steve. He never said that to you either. He didn’t say a damn word to anyone, and instead he formulated a plan in his head to get the fantasy he wanted. It was almost embarrassing how easily it worked. 

He waited a couple of weeks until the conversation between Steve and himself was long forgotten. He waited until it felt like a random day when he suddenly called Steve, frantic and desperate and seemingly in need of some serious help from a friend. 

“Woah, breathe! What’s wrong?” 

“It’s my van,” Eddie said as he tried to sound beat down and glum about the whole thing. “I planned the perfect date, Harrington! We’ve barely been able to each other with her college classes and my shifts at the garage, and now my stupid van won’t be ready in time for the drive in I wanted to take her to. She had been raving about it to her friends.” 

“Oh shit. When is the date?”

Eddie tried to bite back his grin. “Tomorrow night.”

“Just take my car!”

“Really?” 

“Yeah, I won’t need it tomorrow night anyways. I’ll be at Robin’s.”

“You’re a lifesaver, Harrington,” Eddie breathed out a sigh of relief, a wide smile spread across his face. “I’ll promise to get it back to you in one piece.”

And possibly dry cleaned too, Eddie added as an afterthought.

With a car secure in his possession, the rest of the plan ran as smoothly as he hoped. He drove to your house, kissing away any questions you had about the car with some muttered lies about a dodgy engine problem in his van passed between before he headed towards the drive-in. 

He could barely keep his eyes off you the whole drive, but it was almost like you knew the dirty, little fantasy playing in his head. You were wearing a pretty number he swore he had never seen before, some floral dress that rests just above your knees. The straps were thinner than Eddie imagined was practically possible, and the second you shed the small cardigan off in the car, he was a fucking goner. 

He was straining in his jeans by the time you pulled into the drive-in, jammed between two massive pick-up trucks and, god, Eddie had never been more grateful and convinced that a superior being existed. 

Eddie tried to take it slow. He tried to let the moment come naturally. He watched as you pushed your seat all the way back, allowed himself to do the same and he tried to focus on the movie. He really, really tried. But then you had kicked your feet up on the dashboard, your skirt had ridden up just enough for him to see the pair of cotton panties you were wearing and his brain went totally blank.

“You’re staring, pretty boy.” 

He blinked, taking a few seconds to realise you had actually said something to him. “What?” 

It felt like someone caved his chest in when you smiled at him. “I said, you’re staring,” you repeated, looking far too amused at the clueless expression on his face. “You haven’t even looked at the screen in the last fifteen minutes.”

“Must be a pretty boring movie then,” he answered with a shrug. 

You raised your brows. “So you’re watching me instead?” 

“You’re pretty damn spectacular, babe,” he replied. 

“Me or my legs?” You teased. 

“Both,” he answered shamelessly, and you couldn’t help but let out a snort. 

“Watch the movie, Eds,” you told him, shaking your head as you turned to look out the front window towards the screen again. However, your attention quickly shifted back to the boy in the driver seat when his hand landed just above your knee. “Can I help you?” 

“It’s a boring movie, babe,” he said, his fingers gliding along your skin and it took everything in you to not shiver at the feather-light touches. “A waste of time, if I’m being honest. We could always get Steve to slip it to us for free for a couple of hours.”

“Hm,” you hummed, trying to act nonchalant as you focused your gaze on his face and not the way his pretty fingers looked dancing across your skin. “And what do you propose we do instead then? The movie is two hours long. You gonna entertain me, Munson?”

His lips twitched upwards. “I have some ideas on how to keep you preoccupied, baby.”

“Like staring at me?”

“Like fucking you dumb in the backseat.”

You stared at him, eyes wide and lips parted in shock at the blunt words that just left your boyfriend’s lips, and you waited. You waited for him to crack some joke. You waited for him to grin and wave it off, but he didn’t. He just kept staring at you like he was a starved man, like he wanted to fucking ravish you—and honestly, you wanted it too.

“Eddie,” you murmured, shifting in your seat as he squeezed your thigh. “We can’t.”

He raised his brows. “Why not?”

“We are surrounded by people,” you muttered, your cheeks feeling warm and heated as you glanced around at all the cars parked in the drive-in. You were completely surrounded. There was no way somebody wouldn’t catch you. 

“Scared?” He teased with a grin that felt a little sadistic.

“Eddie.”

“Just a lil’ good girl, aren’t you? Not wanting to get caught…not wanting anyone to see how need you get for me,” Eddie mused, something in his eyes darkening as he continued to trace his fingers along your thigh. 

Your breath hitched as he reached the hem of your skirt. “Eddie—”

“It’s a shame I don’t believe you, honey,” he murmured as his eyes snapped back up towards you, as he watched your face carefully as his fingers slid underneath your dress and lightly grazed your clothed cunt. “Not when you’re this fucking wet and I’ve barely touched you.” 

“I–” You opened your mouth to speak but you couldn’t. Not when his thumb pressed down on your clit. 

“You can act like a good girl all you want but I know the truth, baby,” he hummed as he watched your hand dart down to grip his wrist—but not to push him away. No, you were keeping his hand locked in place like you were scared he was going to move away. “You fucking love the idea. You fucking love the idea that anyone could see what a desperate little slut you become for my cock, hm?”

“Please,” you breathed out, your head falling back against the seat as your legs opened slightly wider. 

Eddie didn’t even bother to hide his grin as he pulled his hand back, listening to the way you whined at the loss. “Take them off.” 

You blinked, your heart beating wildly in your chest. “What—”

“Off. Now.” 

You didn’t waste any time as your thumbs hooked on the waistband of your panties, pulling them down your legs and barely making it past your ankles before Eddie balled the fabric up and shoved it into his pocket. You didn’t even get a chance to comment on how quick he was before the boy was pushing your legs open once again, the fabric of your dress pooled at your hips and your pussy on display for him. 

“Fucking gorgeous,” Eddie muttered, mostly to himself, before he lifted his hand to slowly trace his fingers over your soaked cunt. You shivered at the soft touches, your thighs instinctively moving to clench shut but he pushed them open again. “Nuh uh, honey, not letting you hide from me.”

“Eddie,” you whined, a little too desperate when he had barely touched you but you didn’t care. “Please. Fuck, please.”

“I know, baby, I know,” he cooed, his tone almost tipping over that line of condescending. But honestly, it just made the coil in your stomach tighten. You liked it when he was a little mean. You liked it when he knew just what you wanted. “Gonna make my girl feel good. Promise.”

One hand gripped the fabric of your dress, letting it bunch in your first as your other hand pressed against the window. You tried to keep quiet. You tried to remind yourself that cars were far from soundproof. You tried to remind yourself that you were surrounded by other movie-watchers. You tried to remind yourself that anybody could look over and see you. 

But it was really hard to care about anything other than Eddie burying two fingers inside you, pumping and curling his fingers in a way that had you arching off your seat. 

And Eddie couldn’t help but watch, completely enthralled. 

He didn’t give two shits about the movie when he had you. The way you squirmed and wiggled in the passenger seat, your nails digging into the fabric of the seat and scratching along the car door as he continued to thrust his fingers inside you. The way you clenched around him, incoherent babbles and needy noises leaving your mouth as you reached closer and closer to your edge. The way you looked so fucking pretty with flushed cheeks and glossy eyes and he had barely fucking touched you. 

This was a movie he could never get sick off. This was a movie he could never look away from even if he tried. 

And fuck, the way you were far too loud when you came. The way he was so fucking sure that either patrons in the trucks beside you could have heard you, could have looked over and seen you coming around his fingers as you cried out his name. The way Eddie felt something quite like pride burst in his chest at the idea. 

“Atta girl,” he cooed, his thumb brushing over your sensitive clit as your body convulsed at the burst of pleasure. “Told you I know what my pretty girl wants.” 

“Eds,” you mumbled, somewhere lost between pleasure and desire as you watched him slide his fingers out of you. As you watched him bring his fingers to his lips, shamelessly sucking off the mess you made and groaning at the taste of you on his tongue. As you watched his eyes roll back as he savoured the moment. 

And before you could even let yourself catch your breath, his hand slapping the inside of your thigh as he flashed you a smirk. 

“Get that pretty ass in the backseat, baby.” 

There was something about the way you didn’t even hesitate as you clambered into the backseat of the car, even with shaky legs and panting breaths as you tried to recover from your previous orgasm. There was something about the sight of your dress pulled up over your ass, giving him a pretty view of your pussy as you climbed into the back. There was something about the fact you were so unbothered and uncaring about patrons in the drive-in hearing or seeing you now because you only had one thought on your mind—and it was his cock.

Eddie groaned at the sight of you in the backseat, biting on your bottom lip as you looked at him with a sense of urgency. You wanted him. You needed him. And fuck, if that didn’t make blood rush down to his already painfully hard cock. 

His fingers moved down to unbutton his jeans, hand slipping beneath the waistband to squeeze the bulge in his boxers for some relief but it wasn’t enough. He needed to be inside you, he needed to feel you clenching around him, he needed to have your pretty pussy wrapped around him. 

The car was already reaching a point of warmth that would start to become unbearable with too many layers. With the windows already starting to fog up and a thin layer of sweat covering your skin, Eddie barely wasted any time in shedding a few layers until the boy’s flannel and shirt were thrown somewhere on the driver’s seat and his jeans and boxers were pulled down enough for him to pull his cock out, stroking the length of himself as you quickly shifted onto your hands and knees. 

His head was brushing against the roof of the car, the vehicle had probably already rocked a suspicious amount to the people around you and Eddie was certain that if somebody passed right now, they would get a direct view of his ass—but he didn’t care as he gripped your hips, pulling you back until your ass was flush against his pelvis and his cock was buried deep inside you.

“Shit,” he breathed out, his chin tucked against his chest as he watched the sight of your cunt swallowing his cock. He let out a whimpering noise when your walls clenched around him, squeezing him so tight he could have sworn he would’ve come instantly if he wasn’t using every ounce of self-control to hold himself back. “Feel like fuckin’ heaven, honey.”

“Please,” you whined, pushing back against him as your nails dug into the material of the seats. “You promised.” 

“I know, I know,” he cooed, that hint of the patronising tone lacing his words again and making you clench around him. “Gonna do what I promised, baby. Gonna fuck you dumb and make sure everybody in this drive-in knows it.” 

It shouldn’t have turned you on so much. It shouldn’t have made your stomach dip in desire. It shouldn’t have made your head spin with a kind of dizziness only Eddie Munson could bring. 

And yet, it did. 

And you were absolutely fucking shameless about it. You didn’t care what your patrons thought. You didn’t care if there were people there you knew and would see. You didn’t care about anything when Eddie was pounding into you from behind, your face squished against the car seat as he kept going and going and going. 

You didn’t care about drawing the attention of others as the car rocked with his movements, or the fact your hand pressed against the foggy window gave everyone a clear indication of what was happening. Not when the debauch noises of Eddie fucking you echoed through the car, the shameless sign of how much you loved this. 

You didn’t care about anything other than the bruising grip on your waist as he fucked your soaking pussy, as your walls clenched around him, as you moaned his name over and over and over until you felt white spots dotting your vision as you came around his cock. 

You could barely comprehend the world around as his fingers slipped into your mouth to muffle the whimpering moans you let out, to keep them just for himself as he thrusted one, two, three more times until he finally let himself go. You barely cared about anything else as you lazily sucked on his fingers, a low groan of appreciation sounding through the car as you felt him hunch over you, cooing at how well you did for him.

“That’s my girl,” he murmured as he pressed chaste kisses to your cheek, watching the way you blinked up at him as your tongue wrapped around his digits in your mouth. “God, you’re a fucking dream, baby.” 

“Hmmm,” you hummed, pleased with his response. 

You let out a huff of annoyance when he pulled his fingers from your mouth, but seemed happy enough that he showed no signs of moving from his spot just yet. Something about the weight of his body on top of you and his cock still buried deep inside you was oddly calming, and it wasn’t something you were willing to give up just yet.

“What are the chances Harrington never finds out we fucked in his car?” Eddie wondered out loud after a few beats of silence, causing you to let out a snort in response.

“Very, very low,” you murmured as you turned your head to the side so you could look up at your boyfriend. “I would recommend getting it dry cleaned. Maybe blessed by a priest.” 

Eddie rolled his eyes. “That’s a tad dramatic.”

“I can feel your cum dripping down my leg and onto the seats,” you bluntly pointed out, but your lips were still twitched upwards in a smirk. “I’d hardly say that’s me being dramatic.”

“Okay, okay,” Eddie groaned as he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, leaving soft kisses between words. “I’ll get it dry cleaned.”

“Good.”

“After a few more rounds.”

“Eddie!”

“What, baby? I have a few more fantasies I wanna play out and that dress isn’t helping,” he murmured, though you could feel his smirk against your skin. “If anything this is your fault.”

“Really?” You deadpanned. 

But the boy just flashed you an innocent smile, one that looked so sweet but you knew held a million untold, dirty promises in it.

.

[retrowitchy]

relating to hermione as a kid and now (and what that says about my autism habits)

I was recently talking to my sister about how when we were younger (like 8 and 10) we used to pretend to be the HP characters constantly, like 24/7 we were driving our parents insane. We had assigned characters too- she was Harry and I was Hermione (and our cousin was Ron), and she was asking me the other day if I felt like I ever actually related to Hermione as a character or if she just became so special to me because she was, like, Mine. I had never really thought about it, so I just answered no, because I'm not particularly stellar in school.

And then I gave it some thought later, because it is rather shallow of me to reduce Hermione to just, you know, academia.

I was diagnosed with autism a couple years ago, which is an interesting thing to process in your late teens/early 20s. The more I think about things, the more I can tie key autistic traits of mine to Hermione.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't (necessarily) a post to prove a strong theory that Hermione is autistic- more so just to commentate on the fact that she resonated so deeply with me as an undiagnosed autistic kid (not to say that she couldn't be).

Hermione has a deep need to know it all. "Insufferably", too, as Snape might add. This is probably the most obvious thing, but I'm thinking about it a little deeper than just "she knows so much about everything and she's super smart in class". I think that Hermione ties her own intrinsic value to knowing. It's kind of like a role she's settled herself into- if she's not the girl with the answer, who is she? She's built a sense of identity and meaning around being a sort of walking library of information. There's a lot more to Hermione than just her knowing a lot, but I think she struggles to see that about herself sometimes and just clings to this being her sole archetype. I think it stems from a deep set insecurity about herself and a feeling of being awkward or not fitting in. She doesn't click with her peers, so she tries to be better than them (by containing a Library of Congress level of knowledge, facts, and know-how).

But she also genuinely gets joy out of learning and exploring information. I don't want to discount this with the previous statement, because I really do believe that Hermione loves to learn and derives real enjoyment from reading, soaking up facts, practicing spells and potions, etc. There's this genuine joy that I really resonate with from her that comes from being able to know as much as humanely possible about the castle, or her classes, or whatever else.

She's an awkward, clunky outsider. I think that JKR (yuck) was praised a lot back in the day for writing a female character that was a different type of girl than other typical female main characters. Hermione sort of started this trend of like a weird "books not looks" character in media, which I think started off well-intentioned and then snowballed down a slippery downhill slope into the "not like other girls" movement. But Hermione stands out to me as an outside the box female character because not only is she bookish and academic, she's actually lonely and a little gauche. For her first two months at Hogwarts, she has literally zero friends, and it's not until Harry and Ron ultimately adopt her into their group (which really never expands in any serious way) that she has any connection with her peers. She's abrasive and she says things that come off rude or hurtful without meaning to hurt feelings. The rest of their year frequently finds her obnoxious. She can be quick to anger and has really strong emotions. She's not great at making friends or small talk. Of course, Harry and Ron love her in spite of these things (and often because of them, especially in Ron's case), but she can be a little bit hard to swallow when it comes to the rest of her peers.

She needs to be on top of the situation, and is a bit of a control freak. Hermione gets very uncomfortable when she doesn't know what's going on, or what they're going to do about it. She doesn't do well in the face of the unknown. I think her intense need to plan things and learn as much as she can stems from this intense discomfort with being out of her depth and out of control. As an autistic person, I have a really hard time with spontaneity or a lack of understanding of my surroundings, because I already feel so out of place and usually overstimulated, that I need to have some kind of grasp of reality in the form of control and planning. I really see this in the way Hermione ends up making almost every detailed plan for the trio, whether it's homework plans or polyjuicing Crabbe and Goyle or packing and researching way ahead of time for the horcrux hunt. 5. Hermione is loyal as hell. Even though she might not be the most social people-person, and doesn't do well in front of a crowd, Hermione would do anything for Ron and Harry. I actually think this is maybe the strongest trait that all three of the members of the Golden Trio share, despite how different they all are. Hermione is extremely emotionally attached to her friends, and despite sometimes getting annoyed with them, continually drops everything to help them, whether it's doing their homework or saving their lives. It's also part of the reason I think that Romione can't be anything other than endgame- even if they bickered or fought constantly, they're both such fiercely loyal people that they'd stay together out of sheer stubbornness and dedication (not that I think they'd have an unhealthy relationship as adults- I'm the biggest Romione fan, just addressing a common critique of them I've heard).

Anyway, I don't know if all of these things (and I could list more) put her on the spectrum or not- I have a really bad habit of diagnosing every single character I relate to with autism and I'm trying really hard not to do that here. But I know that I felt really seen by her as a 10 year old, and as I reread the series now at 21, I still feel incredibly seen. She's a badass and I love her so much.

[teaberrii]

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Our Happy Ending

Alhaitham has the looks and the smarts. He will also be the stand-in CEO for his grandfather's company for a year.

But, he's been mysteriously cursed to turn into a cat every night since his eighteenth birthday… until he meets you, an employee at his grandfather's company, who rescues him as a cat and changes him back with one kiss.

Alhaitham/You

Notes:

Cross-posted on AO3

Female reader

Chapter index at the end of chapter one

Chapter notes: Brief smut scene in this chapter

You can’t stop thinking about that kiss.

It’s been a few weeks since Zhongli’s wedding. You and Alhaitham have been casually texting, but neither of you brings up the kiss. It’s as if you’re treading through a grey area. Despite what's happened, your feelings toward Alhaitham haven't changed, but that’s only half the battle.

After Zhongli's wedding, you've been giving this a lot of thought. Throughout all of this, Alhaitham has been on your side. His mother is also taking full responsibility.

But no matter how you look at it, the stigma will always remain.

If you choose to be with Alhaitham, you'll be in a relationship with the son of the woman who left your father to die. That’s a fact that will never change. Can you live with that? You can. You have your reasons, but… What does your mother think about this? 

Then, there’s Alhaitham.

Throughout your conversations, he hasn’t pressured or asked you to give him an answer. But you know you can’t leave him hanging for too long.

In addition to all that, today just hasn’t been your day.

You found out that Signora's script got chosen to get the biggest budget of the year. You know you can't win all the time, but it's still not a great feeling. So, even though yours didn't get chosen, you're taking it upon yourself to make changes and submit it again for production. This, of course, is on top of the other responsibilities you're assigned to.

You’re sitting at a desk in the company lounge when you overhear two women sitting at the table in front of yours.

“She was so pretty. They looked like a celebrity couple.”

"Alhaitham is like a celebrity, though." A small laugh. "He should try modelling as a side hustle."

This is something you've been hearing a lot amongst your colleagues. Apparently, Alhaitham has been seen with a “tall, beautiful woman.” It doesn’t take you long to figure out that the woman in question is Layla. While you don’t know the details, you know there’s a business venture happening between the company and hers, which explains why she and Alhaitham have been seen together.

“Hey.” It’s then you notice Childe sitting in front of you. As his mother’s condition has considerably improved, he’s back in Sumeru. “Took you long enough,” he jokes. He takes a peek at your laptop. “Whatcha workin' on?"

"Revisions for my script." You sigh. “Writer's block has never hit so hard,” you say as the women stand up and leave. You close your laptop screen. “It doesn’t help that my team got assigned to other projects. So… I’m pretty much on my own.”

“Well… maybe this will take your mind off things." A small pause. "It's about the curse."

“Did it change?”

Childe nods. “Things have started to improve with my parents, and I noticed that I’m changing a lot later.”

“...I guess our love theory was right."

“You think?" A small pause. "Maybe we’ll find out through you and Alhaitham,” Childe says. Your eyes meet his. “How’re things with him?”

“We’re talking." When you catch a suspicious look in Chlde’s eyes, you say, “Just talking. Nothing else.”

Childe slowly nods. “...Maybe he’s waiting for an answer after everything's over.” He smiles slightly. "Alhaitham's a good guy.” You smile back and nod. Then, he taps your closed laptop. “You said you’re making revisions to your script, right? Why not take inspiration from him?”

Before Childe came along, you have been thinking about how to add an extra… oomph to your story. You feel like something’s missing but you can’t put your finger on it. Childe’s question gets you thinking… Love in the Spotlight had been loosely inspired by your past relationship with Dottore. Who’s to say you can't work that magic again?

Suddenly, it hits you, and you quickly open your laptop. Childe looks from you to your screen as you start typing. Then, he smiles.

“My Boss is My Cat, huh? I like that title.”

You smile back. “You think? I’ll have to rework a lot of it, but… the ideas are already flowing.”

Childe chuckles. “I know it’ll be a hit.”

◆◆◆

It starts as a business meeting but turns a little personal toward the end. Alhaitham and Layla aren’t surprised. They are friends after all.

“By the way… how did the dinner go?” Layla asks.

Ah. Right. His mother had tried to get Layla involved. So, Alhaitham gives her an update but skims the details, only telling her what’s needed to understand the big picture. 

“I see… So, you two are still on a break?”

Yes? No? Alhaitham doesn't have a clear answer. There's texting happening, but nothing concrete to show you two are officially together again. Yes, there's the kiss, but that happened because of an emotional high. It shouldn't be trusted... even though it was the best kiss he's ever had.

“We’re talking,” he says.

Layla nods. “Well, I think that's a good sign. I’d usually say why not try to woo her again, but that’d be risky.”

Alhaitham knows you still need space. But, how long can he keep waiting?

“Hey.” Alhaitham looks across the table and sees Layla giving him a small smile. “It’s good you’re thinking about her feelings, but don’t forget to think about yourself.”

Alhaitham’s phone buzzes with a message just as Layla gets a call. She answers hers while he opens the message from Kaveh.

Drinks tonight?

Well, why not?

“I have to run,” Layla says, after getting off her call. “If it’s any reassurance, I know you two will be fine.”

She gives Alhaitham a friendly hug before she leaves. Then, his phone buzzes again.

Should we invite Catnip?

Catnip?

When Alhaitham leaves the restaurant, he gives Kaveh a call.

“‘Sup, Junior?”

“Who are you talking about?”

Kaveh laughs. “Oh, you mean Catnip? I’m talking about Sis, of course. You did say she’s your catnip, didn’t you? I think it’s a cute nickname.” Alhaitham sighs. “...Wait. Have you two not made up yet?”

“There are still things we have to talk about.”

"I think I get it." A small pause. "Is it something like... What's her new stance on your mother? Will she ask you to cut ties with her so you two can be together? Am I right?"

“...It’s not just about my mother. If we date again, I… have no idea what her mother might say.”

“Dude, you’re like the dream son-in-law that every mother wants.” Kaveh sighs. “But, geez. You’re giving this a lot of thought. I get it, though. You’re serious about her.”

“...I always have been.”

Kaveh smiles. “So, let’s get together tonight and take a little breather. You deserve it.”

◆◆◆

Your manager looks at your laptop screen and reads the title.

“My Boss is My Cat. An interesting title.” Then, he looks up at you. “You want to do a rewrite?”

"I know the leadership team has already decided on Signora's script. This is just a personal project I want to send for review and see if I can get it produced."

“You’d be doing a lot of extra work.”

“I understand, but”—you look at your laptop screen—“I really want to see this through.”

Your manager smiles. “Well, who am I to stop you?”

“Really?”

“As long as it doesn’t interfere with your other responsibilities. You get the green light.”

“Thank you!”

Then, you pick up your laptop and hurry out of your manager’s office.

After finishing your work responsibilities for the day, you spend the rest of your time planning and writing this new script which makes you lose track of time.

Before you know it, you're the only one left in the office. You stop typing and stretch just as your phone rings.

“Hey, Mom,” you say.

“Where are you? It’s late!”

You look at the time on your laptop. “Sorry. I got caught up with some things at work.”

“Don’t tell me you’re planning on sleeping over there?” she jokes. “Or… are you going back to your place?”

Despite you and Alhaitham being on friendly terms, you're still staying at your mother's place. You spin your chair around and look out at the beautiful night scenery.

“...Hey, Mom. Can I… ask you something?”

“Of course, honey.”

“...What do you think of me dating Alhaitham?”

A small pause.

"I had a feeling you'd ask eventually," your mother says. "...I want to hear your thoughts. You're asking me this because you want to continue your relationship with him, right?"

“I do.”

You’re a little surprised at how naturally you said it.

“...But, would it be disrespectful to Dad?” you ask quietly. “I’d be dating the son of the woman who really shouldn’t deserve forgiveness.”

“...Under regular circumstances, I would be opposed to it,” your mother says, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I’m not saying this because I’m on his side, but he did do a lot for us. Let me give you an update.”

Then, your mother tells you they've decided to settle this out of court. But that doesn't mean his mother will avoid wrongdoing. She will compensate the full amount and abide by the punishment given to her by law.

“I won’t be able to forgive his mother, but I don't want to harbour any resentment towards her,” your mother finishes. "I am not opposed to you dating him." You feel a weight lift off your shoulders. “It really depends on you.”

“I… guess I’m a little afraid.” Then, you tell her about your nightmares. “I know I shouldn’t care about what other people say. But sometimes… I can’t help but think what they will say about me or Alhaitham if they find out.” You sigh. “It’s silly.”

“It’s not silly at all, honey. As much as we all say we don’t care about other people’s opinions, we all care to some extent. Some more than others.”

You smile. “But, you know, I just realized something.”

“What’s that?”

“You, Lumine, and Aether are the only opinions I should care about.”

Your mother smiles. “...Perhaps it’s fate that brought you and Alhaitham together, so we can finally have closure.”

The conversation takes a lighter turn when you tell your mother about what you've been working on. Of course, she’s super supportive, which gives you a heightened motivation to finish this personal project.

It's past dinnertime when you get off the call with your mother. After turning off the lights, you head towards the elevator when your phone rings. This time, it's from someone unexpected.

“Sis! Are you home?”

“I’m going to be,” you say. “What’s wrong?”

“Erm, well, Haitham had too much to drink, and I thought he would have hangover pills or something… but”—Kaveh sighs—“the guy's empty.”

“...Are you the one who got him addicted to catnip?”

“What! How can you think that it's me?”

A small pause.

“Okay. I gave it to him once and he… liked it. I swear I tried to stop him.”

You sigh. “Is he okay? I’ll pick up something on my way back.”

Kaveh smiles. “Really? You’d do that for someone who's just a friend?”

“I’ll be right over," you deadpan.

Back at Alhaitham’s apartment, Kaveh slips his phone inside his pocket and looks at his friend who’s sitting on the sofa with a small frown.

“This is your chance, Junior. Don’t waste it.”

“Did you really have to lie?”

"Well, she won't rush over if you're all fine and dandy. So, at least try to look like you're half-dead when she gets here." Alhaitham sighs, and Kaveh smiles. "It's time to make your acting debut."

By the time you reach Alhaitham’s apartment, it’s already late evening. As soon as you knock, Kaveh opens the door.

“Hey, Catnip!”

“...What did you just call me?”

Kaveh laughs. “It’s a cute nickname, don’t you think?”

“Sure." You look around. "Where’s Haitham?”

“In his room.”

As soon as you get there, you see Alhaitham as a cat curled up on top of the sheets. Then, you turn to Kaveh.

“...He looks fine.”

“That’s 'cause he’s a cat. He was dying earlier. Trust me.”

You look at the pills and other hangover-related medication in the bag you’re holding. “Well, I don’t think he can take these right now.”

You hear a soft meow. When you turn, you see Alhaitham struggling to get up. It's not until you're at his side that he immediately walks onto your lap.

“Well, he’s all yours! Good luck.”

Before you can say anything else, Kaveh is out the door.

You look down at Alhaitham who’s lying on his back, his belly facing upwards. His face looks as if he’s in pain, and you gently rub his fluffy belly.

“Let me get you some water.”

You’re about to get off the bed when Alhaitham suddenly gets up, stands on his hind legs, and pushes you down. What just happened? Alhaitham is on top of you, his front paws above your breasts as you stare at each other.

Alhaitham meows again, and you’re wondering if he wants you to kiss him. Well, you can, but certainly not in this position. You pick him up, sit upright, and lean against the wall. You smile as you hold him in front of you.

“Looks like someone’s fine.”

Alhaitham looks down but quickly looks back and groans softly as if in pain.

“You should probably take some acting lessons from Ayato.”

Alhaitham gives you a deadpan look which makes you laugh.

“What? Did I say something wrong?”

His ears droop and you gently tap his nose. Then, you bend your legs and put him belly-up on your legs.

“...I talked to my mom about us.”

Alhaitham’s ears slowly move back up. You’re slightly blushing, so his tail sweeps upwards. Can this mean what Alhaitham thinks it means…?

“I want to be with you, Haitham,” you say, and his little kitty heart has never raced so fast. “...But, I won’t be able to forgive what your mother did. No matter what.” You smile slightly. “I’m not going to ask you to pick between us. I know you still care about her, obviously. But after everything that’s happened, I still want to be with you.”

Alhaitham leans forward, his paws landing on your collarbone. Then, he kisses your nose…

Your eyes widen when a hand is suddenly beside your head. Alhaitham is staring at you, his eyes just as wide as reality sinks in. He has you cornered against the wall. What just happened?

But before you can even contemplate, Alhaitham kisses you full on the mouth. You can taste the wine on his lips as your hands go around his neck. He nips your top lip, caressing it before moving to the bottom. The cold chill you feel against your back is in glaring contrast to the hot, demanding heat pulling you closer… and closer…

Your hand is on his chest but soon becomes entangled with Alhaitham’s. He holds your hand tightly, your bodies flush against one another. Your pulse is thundering as one kiss after another communicates more passion and longing than words ever can.

When Alhaitham finally pulls away, his expression is sincere and intense.

“I love you,” he says.

You immediately kiss him again but only for a moment. You gently nip his lips as you pull back.

“I love you, too.”

His expression turns slightly worried. “...But, what does your mother think?”

“She’s okay with us dating.” You smile. “...I already talked to her.” Then, you push him down, your hand running down his torso. “Did you and Kaveh trick me here?"

“...That’s—”

You kiss him, and you feel his hand in your hair, pulling you closer. Your hand travels lower, and you break the kiss just in time to hear a soft moan when you gently stroke his hardening sex.

Then, you lean forward and whisper, “...Someone deserves to be punished.”

It doesn’t take long for your teasing to reduce him to a panting mess who’s dying to touch you as you ride him deep and hard. Your hands are on top of his, pinning them to the bed. Alhaitham shuts his eyes as he relishes in the pleasure only you can give him. When you suddenly stop, he opens his eyes and sees you tug at one of your hardened nipples with a slightly teasing smile.

Alhaitham immediately sits up, your legs naturally going to either side of his waist. Then, he grabs your hips and pins you to the bed with his body. Your legs are dangling on either side of him, your face flushed.

“...It’s my turn.”

His hips slowly rock into you, allowing you to feel every inch of his hardened sex. And, slowly, as he picks up the pace, he grabs your knees and spreads your legs even wider. When he hears that loud, satisfied moan from your lips, he pins your hands to the bed and leans over and kisses you. Coupled with how he’s angling his hips to drive himself deeper into you, you soon shudder violently with unwilling pleasure.

Alhaitham’s muscles become taut as the sensation builds… builds… and builds until he lets out a short but satisfied cry. With just enough strength to prevent himself from falling on top of you, he brushes some of your hair out of your face.

“...I could do that again,” you joke.

Alhaitham leans upright and pulls you up. Your arms go around his neck. “...Who am I to refuse such a request?”

◆◆◆

The following morning, you wake up in Alhaitham's bed to a delicious scent. As he isn't beside you, you have a feeling that he's already in the kitchen making breakfast. You put on your clothes and head to the washroom. Once you enter the living room, you see Alhaitham putting two plates on the table.

He smiles. “Morning, love.”

“Ooh, what are we having this morning?” you ask, sitting down.

“The Alhaitham special,” he answers, kissing your head.

You laugh. "The what?" Then, he puts a round plate in the middle of the table. It looks like pizza as it's round with meat and vegetables on top. You take a piece and bite into it. Your eyes widen in surprise. "Oh, wow. Not bad."

“...It’s what my Dad used to make,” Alhaitham says, sitting on the opposite side of you. Before you can ask, he continues, “I finally got in touch with him.”

“Really?”

“It was when we were taking time apart. My grandfather was the one who found him.”

“...Did your father tell you anything about the divorce?”

“...I never thought I’d get to talk to you again, Haitham. Does your mother know about this?”

“She does,” Alhaitham answered. “A lot of things have happened… and I think she finally came to her senses.”

“It’s hard to imagine she changed.”

“What happened between you and Mom?”

“She didn’t tell you?”

“...She was very vague,” Alhaitham said.

His father sighed. “...Your mother became obsessed with her career. When she got a promotion, she was already thinking about the next one. I found it admirable at first, but she started using questionable methods to get there.”

“...Questionable methods? Like what?”

“She would use people. And, after getting what she wants, she tossed them aside. I… made a suggestion to her one day, but when things didn’t go as planned, she changed entirely.”

“...What happened?”

“One of her colleagues stole her work. It was a market research report that your mother had been working on for a couple of months. Their company hired someone new after one of her colleagues left. Your mother was a top performer, so”—he sighed—“I suggested she let that new colleague take a look at her report so he can learn from her."

“And that person stole it?”

“...That’s right. He handed it in as his own. I think that was when our relationship really spiralled downwards”

“...Does your mom know that you know about this?” you ask.

“She knows I talked to him, but she didn’t ask about the details. Perhaps she doesn’t want to deal with the past anymore.”

A small pause.

“...I have to say,” you begin, and Alhaitham looks at you. “Your mother may have been trying to protect herself, but selfishness can only go so far before it comes back to bite you.”

“...That’s true. It’s a lesson she learned the hard way.”

And you hope she’ll never forget it.

…

…

…

Two years later

“Do you ever miss being a cat?” Childe asks.

You, Alhaitham, and Childe are having lunch together at Lambad’s Tavern on a sunny afternoon.

That’s a question Alhaitham never thought he’d have to answer. But… it has finally happened. Ever since you and Alhaitham officially got back together, he has never turned back into a cat.

“What about you?” you ask Childe.

As Childe's relationship with his parents got progressively better, his cat transformation also began to die. Now that more of his scripts are getting approved for production, Childe hasn't transformed for nearly a month.

“There’s not really a lot of perks to being a cat,” Childe says. “The only perk would be cuddles with Lumine.”

You give him a slight deadpan look, and he smiles.

Then, you hear Ayato’s voice.

The three of you turn to the TV and see him and his female co-star talking to a journalist.

“He’s been really busy nowadays,” Alhaitham says.

Childe looks at you. “We have you to blame for that."

It’s been almost two years since you officially finished the script for My Boss is My Cat. You’ve worked on it tirelessly, but you had a great support system. After telling Alhaitham that it was loosely based on your relationship with him, he gave you a kiss and said that it would be an absolute hit.

Well, he wasn’t entirely wrong.

You may not have won Best Screenwriter for the effort you put into My Boss is My Cat, but you’re still proud that the company liked it enough to produce it. In the end, Ayato got cast as the male lead and was in the running for a few awards.

The last time you and The Strays talked to him, Ayato said that his transformation was also wearing off. But it was when he was nominated that he noticed that he hasn’t been transforming during his kiss scenes. You still remember the small smile he had when he said he never thought he’d be wishing to transform into a cat.

“Well, what can I say?” you ask with a small smile. “Everyone likes a good cat story.”

“Maybe I should write one, too,” Childe jokes. Then, he looks at you and Alhaitham. “By the way, aren’t you two moving in together?”

You and Alhaitham look at each other and smile. That’s right. You and Alhaitham are moving in together. After Alhaitham’s temporary tenure as CEO, he went on to pursue a higher position than before at Akademiya. And since he’s no longer your boss, your relationship is no longer a secret. What’s more convenient is now that Lumine got a new job as a character designer for a gaming company, she’s looking for a new place. Yours just happen to be free and closer to her company.

“...So, don’t tell me it’s just going to be the two of you,” Childe continues.

“Someone’s nosy,” Alhaitham says, half-jokingly.

“Aw, man, I just want to know if there’s like… I don’t know! A wedding or something!”

You and Alhaitham look at each other again. Then, you look at Childe. “When the time is right, it’ll happen naturally.”

Childe sighs. “So, I guess I won’t be a Godfather anytime soon.” When Childe catches a knowing look between you and Alhaitham, he gasps. “Wait, don’t tell me you’re…”

"No," you say. "But... I wouldn't say we're completely child-free."

Childe looks from you to Alhaitham. “What is this supposed to mean? I need an explanation!”

◆◆◆

Later that weekend, you and Alhaitham invite Lumine and Childe over for lunch. As soon as Alhaitham opens the door, your newly adopted kitten slowly gets up from his cat bed and walks over. 

“He’s so cute!” Lumine gushes as she crouches. She extends her arms and the kitten walks closer so she can pick him up. "What did you name him?"

“When we adopted him, the person says he responds to the name Kazuha,” you say.

“Kazuha?” Childe asks. “Why Kazuha?”

“Not sure. It was the name that was in the box they found him in."

“How could anyone abandon a poor, innocent animal like that?” Lumine huffs, standing up with Kazuha in her arms.

Childe walks over and leans close to the cat who stares at him. “Is it just me or is he kinda quiet?”

You laugh. “You have no idea how much he tried to attack Haitham’s hair.”

“His hair?”

You point to the strand of hair that’s sticking out from the top of Alhaitham’s head.

“Glad it’s still in one piece,” Childe says with a smile.

"And I hope it stays that way," Alhaitham says.

Kazuha hops out of Lumine's arms and onto the couch. "Wouldn't it be funny if Kazuha isn't actually a cat?" she jokes.

You and Alhaitham glance at each other. "What makes you say that?" he asks.

“Oh, it’s nothing. I just thought it would be funny if you happened to adopt a cat who’s also afflicted with the curse.”

“Surely we would’ve noticed a stranger in the house," you say. "We adopted him a while ago."

Lumine chuckles. “Yeah, that’s true.”

Then, your sister and Childe head to the kitchen to grab drinks. You and Alhaitham are about to follow them when you hear a soft meow. Both of you stop and turn around. After Kazuha cleans his face with his paw, he looks at you and Alhaitham and winks.

You've heard of cats winking, so this shouldn't be anything unusual. Right? You and Alhaitham glance at each other.

...Right?

End Notes:

...FIN.

You and Haitham are now proud parents of cat Kazuha who may or may not be... the real Kazuha. XD.

Will there be a sequel of you and Haitham raising Kazuha? ...Erm, probably not.

BUT

There might be a separate spin-off cat Kazuha story in the future. I already have an idea for it. Of course, the pairing will be You/Kazuha but the "you" in that story will obviously not be the same one here. It'll be a separate story with mentions/references to this one.

It still hasn't hit me that MBIMC is over. But you and Alhaitham's story has ended. When I started this story three or so months ago, I never thought it would get this many views. So, thank you for all the love and support <3

And now... I can finally start on the fic that's been plaguing me for months LOL. Any Honkai Star Rail readers here? :> You may see me pop up in that fandom soon...

But until then, TAKE CARE <3

Tag list: @suoshiii @lordbugs @lxry-chxn @seirenspinel @sakiimeo @ash-in-lavender @ceylestia @forsh4dow @deathkat657 @kalpie @elernity @sentieence @chichibleeps @sunsethw4 @hjjks @tanspostsblog @nqctre @just-simping-over-genshin @uchihaeirin @vynbin @ayanokomu @dksfl920 @rin1802 @itztaki @thetwinkims @imkaaayy @angeilix @starlighttotheleft @letthewindlead @certaindreampost @winterpein @theprinceofkhaos @warrior-of-justice @vvyeislazzy @n8mareee

[tencrushesperday]

Now I Can See You - Rutger McGroarty

summary : when did things get so complicated ? They always get complicated when you overthink. Maybe if you acted more with your heart and less with your head you wouldn’t be locked up in a room with Rutger.

pairing : rutger mcgroarty x junior! reader

TW: implications of sex, insecurities (idk if it’s really a tw but better to be safe than sorry)

a/n : you just KNOW i had to use a Taylor song name for the tittle. i wrote this one a few weeks/ months ago and @sillinger said i should post it so here it is. idk what i did here and honestly i’m not good with criticism so if u don’t like pls just ignore it <3

You and Jacob met in Algebra first semester of freshman year. Your friendship was strategic on both parts. You wanted to cut ties with your shy high school persona and become a free spirit college student who knows how to have fun. He needed to pass that Algebra class. It was a win-win relationship : you passed him your notes and explained to him what he didn’t understand and he invited you to hockey or frat parties. Getting along also kinda helped.

Therefore, for the next few years, you became inseparable at parties. Beer pong partners, couch interlocutors, he would always have his arm swung around your shoulder. If the sibling energy wasn’t so prominent your friends would have assumed you were a couple. But you always had each other’s backs and nothing even remotely ambiguous ever happened.

When in junior year, Jacob introduced you to the freshmen.

You thought Rutger was cute the moment you laid eyes on him.

You got to know later that the first impression was mutual because he would flirt with you any chance he got.

But he flirted with anybody anyway. You noticed after the few first parties that he was quite popular with the ladies.

Therefore you never took his comments seriously. You were looking for a serious relationship. He was probably looking for a new conquest to add to his list.

It wasn’t something you were interested in.

Until that fateful night. You needed to take the edge of that night. You’ve had a stressful week before, filled with presentations and assignments to turn in. So, you - just- needed to relax. You’ve had a few of whatever Nolan had concocted you. Rutger complimented your dress when you where sitting on the stairs together. Everything happened fast that damned night.

After that it didn’t take long for the dress to find itself on the floor, and what needed to happen happened.

~~

In that moment you hated Jacob more than anything. Why did he have to go and meddle. You realise you should have never told him about Rutger.

At least you had the decency to not tell him how much you actually liked the freshman. You would have never heard the end of it.

But now you’re stuck in this room with him and you know that whatever Jacob is doing right now he’s not letting you out of the room before you and Rutger talk.

Yet he doesn’t seem like he has much to say, so you keep your mouth shut as well. You want to know what he’s thinking. You want to apologise for running away in the morning, for leaving him with a cold bed, for ignoring him afterwards.

But you know it’s useless. He doesn’t care. He probably slept with at least another girl since then. What was it a week, ten days, since?

You’re the one who would have wanted to wake up in the stupidly warm arms, pressed to his stupidly toned chest. He was probably relieved when he didn’t have to kick you out in the morning.

But the silence is awkward so small talk it is, you decide.

Yet the moment you start talking to ask how he’s doing, he interrupts you.

“Why’d you leave in the morning?” he sounds disappointed.

Wait. Does he?

You don’t know what to say so you just say what you truly thought since the beginning, “I didn’t want to wait for you to kick me out.”

He widens his eyes at you. Really it’s comical the way his mouth hangs open for a second before he asks “Is it really what you think of me? That I would have kicked YOU out in the morning?” He insists on the word you and you don’t know what to think of it.

You’re left speechless. What can you answer to that anyway, except for yes. He looks so offended already, that wouldn’t help.

“I know I’m just a freshman hockey player. But i thought.. with you being friends with Truss and all… maybe you’d have a better image of me… I thought… i thought i finally got you to look my way…”

Now it was your turn to look at him with wide eyes as you only manage to say one thing. “What?”

“It’s okay I understand it was a mistake for you. I’m younger and you probably don’t have the time to deal with me but can we please remain…”

What? No, no, no. After the word mistake not much makes sense to you. You don’t hear him anymore. Where did he get that idea?

“Wait. What? No, no, no. It was not a mistake for me, not at all. I just… I thought you wanted me gone after you got what you wanted… I… I thought you’d get bored of me and kick me out and start ignoring me after we slept together…”

You’re ashamed to admit how insecure you are.

“Is you esteem of me really that low?” Rutger’s question really surprises you. And is it pain you hear filling his voice?

“I genuinely like you, did since the beginning. And i couldn’t get you to see me. You always acted like i was a kid and I almost lost hope honestly. But I wanted you - I want you - so I kept trying to flirt with you. The moment you followed me into that room, I’ve never been more happy, and when you started kissing me back I swear I’ve felt more awake than ever. I just had to remember everything about you, about your body. I asked you what seemed like a thousands times to me if you were sure of what you wanted and you just kept shutting me up with new kisses until I gave in.”

The images he was depicting, you knew them all too well. You had replayed the night in your head too many times to count. It still gave you goosebumps.

“I’m so sorry” You knew he wasn’t done but you had to say it out loud. Still, you didn’t know if it was enough. You had hurt him in order to protect your own feelings, you could see that now. It was unfair to him.

“I am so so sorry Rutger. I never thought of you as a kid… Really. Never. I’ve noticed you since we met…”

Jacob’s room wasn’t so big but in this moment, as you took small steps towards Rutger, it seems miles long. You didn’t know what to say anymore. You wanted to tell him just how much you like him and how much you want him but the words wouldn’t get out. Being vulnerable has always been difficult for you and you’re so used to doing everything to protect your feelings.

But this is not on him and you know it. He told you everything he had to say. He said he liked you, he said he wanted you. Yet you still can’t believe him. Damn those insecurities.

“More than anything I’m sorry for being insecure. I was convinced you would get bored of me so I shut you out from the beginning. It wasn’t fair to you”

How can you tell him you like him too? And now he’s so close, he is all around you, and all you want to do is kiss him again.

“Do you really mean what you said earlier?” It may sound pathetic. It probably does but you have to be sure.

He doesn’t say anything for a while, just stares at you. Then he leans in and it’s enough of an answer.

[clownakai]

Have you assigned any more Dr. Who episodes to DetCo characters PLEASE I need an update. I'll explode

Fjsjgjd I haven't had as much time to do it as I would have liked (exams season </3) but I do have a couple ideas pinned down I think... Here we go :3

- Sonoko would appreciate Midnight methinks :) she does like dragging Ran to supposedly haunted locations for fun(?????) and if that's not a horror junkie idk what is. The inherent horror of a creature you cannot see + banger soundtracks and an angsty ending with a small reprise of the episode's scary gimmick and how the Doctor can't bear to hear it again??? Hello??? She'd love it tbh

- Conan watches The God Complex one (1) time and gets massively fucked up about it for a while because hello. He's just like the Doctor, isn't he? "Trust me/believe in my skills/I'll find a way to win/wait for me", over and over and over, and the same faith others put in him is what puts them in danger. The promises he makes always have a chance of ringing empty and he does fail to save people. He's no hero, you know

- Haibara would be taken a lot by Turn Left I think. Something about what could have been had a single choice been different, and how that's never a guarantee things would be better anyway. Yes the point of the episode is to highlight how fundamental Donna and the Doctor meeting is for the sake of the universe, but I think Shiho is exactly the kind of person who would add her own spin to it nonetheless

- Shuuichi, as I mentioned, would resonate a lot with the Doctor in Heaven Sent. Something about grief and a new goal intertwining, and the fact that the mystery that needs solving takes over everything else while still remaining entrenched in the Doctor's inability to give up on Clara. The confession dial— something used to pass on peacefully, to lay your regrets to eternal rest— becoming a prison to escape from because that's what the Doctor has been doing their entire life. They run from their mistakes and their regrets and their grief. Four and a half billion years. I'm insane

[beauty-beast-week]

Beauty and the Beast Week 2024, Day 4: Cactus Master List

Fic: Piping hot (Lumiere & Mrs. Potts, G) by @firawren

Ever since Mrs. Potts and Lumière transformed back into humans, they’ve felt cold constantly. It’s a big adjustment to go from being filled with boiling water or covered in flames to just being an ordinary person of skin and bone again.

Fic: Narrative Dimensions of Justice - chapter 1 (Adam/Belle, M) by @soldegira

Modern university AU. Belle is a literature PhD student and Adam is about to be a first year law student at Tulane (if he passes his summer class). They're assigned as partners in their literature-law cross-listed class, and Belle is about to throw in the towel and drop him as a partner until she hears that he has gotten into a terrible car accident, leaving him hospitalized.

Fic: Ease the pain (Cogsworth/Lumiere, G) by @kikimccloud

After days and days of work, Henry Cogsworth back is killing him with incredible pain. But he's more than lucky, to have a carring and very skilled husband.

Fic and moodboard: Clash of Light and Shadow (Belle/Maleficent, E) by @twisting-echo and @small-tragedies

From the moment they first crossed paths, sparks flew—not the kind that ignited warmth, but the kind that threatened to burn everything to the ground. They were almost always at each other’s throats, with Belle’s unwavering optimism and outspoken nature grating on Maleficent’s patience, while Maleficent’s brooding and callous intensity tested Belle’s resolve.

Fic: If only you'll keep me - chapter 4 (Adam/Belle, M) by @annaofthenorthernlights

Belle finds out what is troubling Adam - and it´s a hard blow to deal with…

Fic: you're my home, stay with me - chapter 2 (Beast/Belle, T) by @prince-adams-japris

Belle and the Beast came to an understanding after the wolf attack, but that doesn't stop them from getting under each other's skin.

Fic: Beast/Belle library sex - part 2 (cw sex) by @rs-hawk

Ficlet: Esme (Belle & Esmerelda) by @true--north

Comic: Heartflowers by @fizzy-dizz

Art: Pain - Adam becoming the Beast by @zoeloveconvers99

Art: Pain - injured Beast by @beastylittlething

Art: Sharing gone wrong - Gaston and Adam by @cheetospuff

Art: Lumiere's flaming burns (cw burns) by @mreynolds23

We caught a couple works that forgot to tag @beauty-beast-week, but if we missed yours in this day 4 list, shoot us a DM with the link and we'll add it to the list as well as reblog it.

View the entire fic collection on AO3

[imperial-strategist]

Unexpected Visitor-Part 5

Word Count: 1,279

(running transcription protocol 14-mUn09 narrative algorithm) 01001001 01101101 01110000 00100000 01000101 01100011 01101000 01101111

Blithe's eyes slowly blink open to find Echo kneeling beside her and Tech's face hovering over hers with his datapad in hand. "Nothing is broken and seeing as no one here seems to be in a rush to initiate a frenzied carnal encounter," he adds with a glance at Echo, "it would seem that we have avoided pollen exposure." He stands and follows Crosshair out the door without looking back, mumbling under his breath that he would have liked for at least one of them to have been exposed so he could study the results.

Hunter kneels beside Echo and gazes briefly at Blithe's pupils. "Concussion for sure. She should go to the infirmary."

"No! No, I'm fine!" Blithe insists quickly. Too quickly.

Hunter leans in so close that Blithe is unsure of his intentions until she hears him inhale deeply. "She's scared. I can smell it on her."

"You're safe, Lieutenant," Echo offers. "The plant's dead."

"I'm fine," she repeats. "I don't need treatment. I'll be fine."

That was too many "fines", and Echo suddenly understands. "I'll make sure she gets what she needs, Hunter."

Hunter looks between them and nods, taking one last look at the mass of steaming vines littering the lab before taking his leave.

"I don't want to go to the infirmary, sir," Blithe says quickly as she attempts to stand. She doesn't even get halfway to upright before her head is spinning, and Echo has to catch her by the arms.

"You don't have to. I get it. I'm not exactly big on the infirmary either." He looks around and his frown deepens. "Looks like we're staying in your room tonight."

"We, sir?"

"You're concussed. I'm not leaving you alone tonight. Besides, I can see my quarters sparking from here," he says while jerking his head toward the open doorway, "so that's not happening. Your quarters are designed for two. I'll take the other bunk so I can keep an eye on you."

"You don't have to," Blithe responds with a wince. "I'm sure there are more comfortable temporary quarters you can be assigned to while yours are repaired."

"Blithe," Echo says slowly, "either I stay and watch over you, or you spend the night in the medical wing. Your call."

Blithe smiles softly in relief as he helps her to stand. "Thank you, sir."

Echo gives a single nod as he steadies his dizzy aide. He almost walks her to her bunk, but changes course and heads for the small refresher instead.

"Sir?"

"You need to change. You've got plant juice on your uniform. I don't know what that'll do if it seeps into your skin. Let's not find out. Do you have something to change into in there? Night clothes?"

"I have the standard issue on a hook, sir." She turns and makes a face as she points up at his neck. "You should consider washing up too, sir. Just in case."

Echo lifts his hand to his neck and feels the syrupy juice on his collar. "Good call. You steady?"

Blithe takes a couple of steps. "I think so."

Echo returns a few minutes later to find his aide blinking heavily as she sits on the edge of the bottom bunk. He clears his throat when he sees what she's wearing; the gray sleep shorts and sleeveless shirt bearing the Imperial crest were not what he was expecting from the "standard issue."

Blithe's eyes widen slightly at what he is wearing too. She expects to see him return in a clean officer's uniform. What she sees instead is a fresh black undersuit that highlights everything beneath it. Her face and ears heat up as he approaches. She tries not to stare at the lines where his thighs meet his prostheses or the muscular thighs themselves, but lifting her eyes higher only makes matters worse. The suit easily puts rumors about the extent of his injuries to rest for good. 

Echo looks down at her fixed stare with a quirked eye. He knows the intense look is a result of her disorientation, but suddenly wonders if he should have worn something that hid his body from her better. He’s sure she would be noticing the places where his body transitioned to machinery if she had her wits about her. Even more interesting is the realization that there were other things in the undamaged part of his quarters he could have worn, making him internally question when he had gotten so comfortable around her.

He kneels in front of her, tilting her chin up with his scomp to see her eyes in the light. "I bet you've got a big headache."

Blithe squints against the overhead lighting. "I've had worse."

"Hmm. Then I guess you don't need this med patch." He holds up an already unwrapped unit between two fingers.

A miserable sigh escapes her without permission, and Echo takes it as confirmation that the patch is as needed as he was anticipating. "You know why I don't like visiting medical. Why don't you?"

Blithe watches as her commander gently fixes the bacta-infused wonder to her forehead, fingers lingering for a moment longer than necessary before he motions for her to lie back. She internally debates answering his question. She hadn't intended to share this part of her past with him, but he was her superior and he asked her directly. "You've read my file."

"I have." He pulls the blanket over her and lowers the light, then proceeds to lower the top bunk from its home in the wall. But instead of moving to climb into it for sleep, he sits back on his heels at the head of the lower bunk. "Tell me."

She takes a deep breath to steady herself against a sudden wave of nausea, then stares up at the underside of the dark bunk above her. "The insurgent attack that gave me this," she began, pointing to the gash above her eye, "injured me very badly. I remember waking up for a few seconds at a time in a bacta tank and seeing distorted images and bubbles. When they finally pulled me out, I had a lot of scarring and..."

"And?"

Blithe's eyes screwed shut. "And I was told that my mother had died."

Echo knew her medical history and family history. He didn't know her trauma and grief were linked. "I'm sorry."

"I know it's ridiculous, but I can't stand to be around doctors or medical situations of any kind now. Every time I do, I see them."

Who "them" was—the insurgents, bodies, the doctors themselves—didn't matter, and Echo was not about to ask. The loss of her mother was not unlike his removal from the Techno Union stasis chamber. He knows that pain. Survivor's guilt and a sense of abandonment are his constant companions. He now knows that they are hers too.

He doesn't realize until he looks back at her face that he has been lost in his thoughts long enough for her to have fallen asleep. The reason for his presence snaps back to the forefront of his mind and he shakes her. "Blithe? Lieutenant?"

"Mmm?"

Echo chuckles softly at the groggy display. "I'll need to wake you up again soon to check on you."

"M'kay." She groans softly at the pain in her head before rolling to her side. "G'night, Echo."

Echo's eyes widen at the sound of his name. It's insubordinate and unacceptable, but he'll allow it in the circumstances. He climbs into the top bunk with no need to set an alarm to remind him to check on his battered charge.

He knows he won't be able to sleep tonight.

[echoedcrosshairs]

Those Who Fight Together - Part 15

Summary: Undescribed Female Jedi nicknamed Reaper goes toe to toe with the Techno Union, mention of character death? and blowing a little steam with some restraints

Warning: Violence, Old Force Magic, Bondage if you squint, Techno Union, The Algorithm experiment, injuries, temporary blindness, restraints, drinking

Word Count: 11k

Part 14 Part 16

Masterlist

Echo paced back and forth on the Marauder, something didn't feel right but he couldn't place it maybe it was just being alone again in a sort of cramped space. He looked at the empty chairs before forcing himself to sit in one, I could just head to Kamino not that there's anyone there for me to talk too but I wouldn't be alone. I could met up with the 501st... She'd probably kill me if I got hurt. Echo's hand went to the crystal around his neck, I wonder if you've found them yet. Was it a formality or am I going to need this. He wrapped his fingers around it.

"GONK GONK GONK"

"You take forever to charge," Echo grumbled, "I need company."

"GONK GONK GONK"

"I don't speak power droid, add it to the list of stuff to learn. Do you mind me waking you?" Echo listened to a happy gonk sound and amused that it was fine, "There out on a mission... in the outer rim, the depths of the outer rim and I had to stay here," Echo heard the panic gonk sound, "Their going after the group that did... this, the group you guys rescued me from" he said waving at himself, "There with this incredible Jedi, we call her Reaper," Echo recounted meeting her and their assignments and apologized for not charging him. Gonky seemed to listen to him making distinction noises keeping him company. "Thanks Gonky, I think we're gonna be here all night."

Slick flew up and awake hearing the small rustling start, he flung the covers back see Crosshair and Tech attempt to wake her up. Crosshair growled but got up allowing him to get in. Slick climbed on top of the bed and rested on his knees holding his hand to her face, "Duchess, time to wake up," Slick gave her a couple moments but she wasn't waking, "One of those nights," he scowled getting up and gently pulling out of the bed feeling her start to shake and the sweat starting. He dragged her over to his bed folding his legs and rocking her in "Duchess, wake up," he said tapping her face a little harder.

You jolted awake in a panic, your head colliding violently against a hard object, "Ow! Hard-head," Slick complained rubbing his jaw. You tried to open your mouth but his hand was over it shaking his head, "Duchess, calm down" He said removing his hand, "Remember they're here. Breath," you slumped in his arms trying to lower your pounding heart, "Nightmare or a vision?" He asked. "Nightmare." Slick nodded knowing the repeated night, "Do you want to try to go back to sleep or go for a stroll? I can't obviously offer you fresh air or scenery however because someone just had to insist on white everything."

"More food?" you asked.

"Yeah come on."

You crawled out of Slick's lap rubbing your eyes and held Hunter's cool touch about your skin, reflexively you grabbed him and took him with you. The Duchess doesn't...

"Shut up, I just woke up," you groaned.

"Talking to yourself again?" Crosshair eyed.

"You can also shut up," you snipped.

Hunters hand tightened around yours as he saw the way your eyes slitted as you looked at Crosshair. He tugged you a little closer as you all finished the walk to the lounge. He found Reef already there cooking.

"I thought I heard an approaching disturbance," He said turning his head around but keeping his body on task, "I am preparing breakfast, do you need to partake of some early?"

"I'm famished," you said tugging your hand out of Hunters and crawled into the booth next to slick.

"Last time you said that, I had to insert Reef's other program and that was a long day," Slick leered.

"To be far we had just gotten back from a rough assignment I was very very hungry," you laughed slightly shoving him, "and if I remember correct you were eating during it anyway."

"I was starving, I'm not a desert before dinner type of guy and you had entertainment."

Wrecker asked "Are they talking about what I think they are?"

"Yes. I bet Echo would love to know," Crosshair rolled his eyes, "Told him she had a droid kink."

"It was the type of sex, Crosshair, that would make you jealous" you narrowed your eyes at him, "Now be a good boy and shut up, maybe you'll get a treat," you send slipping back into the cool waters of the Duchess.

Slick put his hand on your leg again and leaned in, "As much as that one deserves it, you don't need to be so harsh until we get there."

"Keep getting close, I'll bend her over one of these stools," Crosshair hissed behind you.

You jumped a little, "Cross! Maker you step as light as a loth."

"He's definitely crossed," Slick chuckled rolling his eyes taking his hand off.

"I expected his behavior from Tech not you," you squinted.

"Don't think that drink didn't effect him too?" Crosshair growled.

"Yet he drank it," you said turning back to the counter just to have Crosshair grab you and spin you back around.

Slick tried to hide the smirk on his face when Reef split his arms and pulled 4 guns on him, "Is there a problem Dutchess?" he asked pointing each of them at Crosshair who didn't even look phased.

"No, but thank you Reef," you said kindly watching Reef tuck everything away, you gave Crosshair a little shove and stood up turning the icy stare, "I know you're looking out for your brother but here? You need to watch out for yourself. Anything else?"

"No."

You lean forward looking like you were going to kiss him but very forcibly bit his lip, "Good, you're getting on my nerves," and sat back down.

"What did I say about playing nice?" Slick scolded, "even if he started it," he muttered, "I'm going to regret this," he groaned already seeing the spiteful wheels turning in your head.

You gave him a little coy smile, "You mean my favourite way to treat you when you irritated me? Then yes." You turned around and grabbed Crosshair by the throat gently then forcibly pushed him to the wall you flicked your fingers up and his arms went flying above his head, "I bet you've imagined this differently," you said running your tongue over your teeth which got  a snarl from him. Carefully you tugged his shirt up and flicked it over his head using it at a cushion for his hands.

"You can only keep my hands up for so long," he growled.

"You're going to be holding your own hands up. Slick, darling,  a black napkin and my tea."

"Duchess," he groaned staring at the glint in your eye knowing there was no change your mind. He grabbed the napkin and quickly put on the tea, "The tea will be done soon."

"Lovely," you said patting him taking the nap, "Crosshair," you gave him mischievous siren eyes, "You're going to hold your hands up until I say... Crosshair again," the compulsion spilled out then the pain and coughing. You covered you mouth knowing what next, forcing your self to stand straight as your throat tore a little and covered your mouth.

Hunter's nose flared as the smell hit him, the faint scent of blood. His hand tighten on the table and he felt Wrecker's hand come down his shoulder. Tech blinked rapidly looking between Hunter and the napkin. Crosshair's eyes went wide as he saw the discoloration and the faint stain, he tried to fight against it but couldn't, "Hold your hands up," kept replaying in his mind every time he tried.

"Was that really necessary?" Slick whispered handing you the tea.

"When the time comes... he has to know what it will do to him. At least this way it'll be kind. Duty above all," you whispered back after taking a few drinks of the tea and swishing it around your mouth before swallowing, "Much better," you purred, sipping it until it was empty and handing it back to him. You turned back to Crosshair who was studying you, you moved back in front of him letting your fingers walk up his chest, "You are so handsome."

He remained silent observing very movement and word letting the icy sniper underneath show tucking away the sliver of warmth he displayed. He watched as you trailed your fingers up his chest your finger tips spread wide to feel more of him. Crosshair felt you gazing into his eyes and he let himself bore back into yours with every ounce of ice even when your touches dance to tender places like his neck and his legs.

"Is he always like this?" Slick asked leaning against the table watching with Hunter, Wrecker and Tech, "There's nothing in his eyes."

"Crosshair is a sniper, our Reaper is currently the Duchess. He did happen to try to kill her when he saw her with Dooku so the fact that she has him... displayed is probably setting off was warning bells," Tech offered.

"He what?" Slick's head snapped, "I regret every word of trying to get her to be nice. He really did just toss her aside..." he voiced louder knowing he would hear as he scoffed marching over there. One handed he snaked his fingers over the ones you had on Crosshair's chest and pulled your hand back, "Let him go Duchess. He doesn't deserved to be worshiped like this from you and doesn't seem to appreciate it anyway there's no point." He saw the mask slip for a moment revealing defeat and sadness before being replaced with the pouty flirt that doesn't get her way, "Crosshair," Slick let your hand go, "You can do that to me anytime," he said swiping his finger up your cheek, "At least I can appreciate a woman seductively touching me, what man can't? Oh wait" he added purposely poking him before heading back to his stool taking the napkin and tossing it in the garbage.

"What happened to play nice?" You asked joining him.

"He apparently tried to kill you. I know you're not the same person around them you are with me but he doesn't deserve that slice of the Duchess, the tenderness under the rage and wraith. None of them would appreciate it."

Crosshair watched pulling his shirt back on tucking it in, he enjoyed it but it still felt wrong. He stuck a tooth pick in his mouth and walked back to the table with brothers questioning if his dignity was intact. I hate that fucking Reg.

"Once again your right."

"I know," his voice full of glee, "Food!" he said looking down at the steaming food Reef set before both of you. He watched you dig in and scarfed it before eating himself.

"Are you enjoying the food?" Reef asked looking down at the empty plate, "and soft enough for throat?"

"It was as perfect as always."

"Thank you, I must check in with our guest."

You laid your head down at the table, letting the tiredness hit you with the warm food, "Let's get you back to bed," Slick sliding his arms around your shoulders and knees, "We can have fun when you wake up."

"You're not going to sleep?"

"With Crosshair on board? Not a chance, I'll nap when your awake just so one of us are up."

"He's not going to-"

"The emptiness and hollowness in his eyes said different."

The rest of the walk was silent, he gently returned you to bed the and the squad retaking their position except Crosshair who sat in the corner floor so he could watch the whole room. Slick grabbed a pad and sat up in his bed occasionally checking in watching Crosshair's glare at him and heard Wrecker's snoring. Almost as bad as Chopper's, he scowled remembering his unit but still missed them. Wrecker didn't sleep either, he stayed up petting your head for the rest of the night ready to step between Slick and Crosshair if a fight broke out and he was pretty sure it was.

You felt Hunter's hand on your face and a kiss on your forehead making your eyes flutter open, "Good morning," you yawned sleepily stretching  into him, "mmm you smell good," curling up a little more.

"Don't get any ideas, it's still my time," Tech said to no one in particular noting Wrecker, Crosshairs and Slick's absence, "Obviously that's not a good sign," he said.

"Their fine, Wrecker and Cross are eating and Slick's on deck," Hunter replied, "Non of them slept."

You rolled your eyes sitting up, wiping them, "You guys shouldn't have come," you muttered.

"Why so you could have your fun with Slick and Reef?" Tech deadpanned.

"No, it would have been the last thing on my mind but at least Slick would have liked it, I have never been more degraded and insulted..." you sighed the anger deflating a little, "Slick's right, there was nothing when I touched no warmth.. no humanity, nothing. I shouldn't have even bothered. It was like looking in the mirror."

"Do you doubt Crosshair's affection?" Tech inquired.

"I doubt everything I have ever believed," you uttered grabbing another outfit and leaving them.  You changed walking down the hall without a care in the world as you headed towards the deck and climbed your spot in the chair in the center, BB-001 informed you that you still over half of an orbital's flight and you groaned. You knew Slick could see your bitter mood but neither of you wanted to discuss it and it was only made worse then Crosshair walked in shirtless.

"Do it again," he said leaning over you in the chair.

You scoffed "Why would I waste more of my time when you proved me to be uninspiring to a fine creature such as yourself?" You snipped trying to move him with your leg but failed with how firmly he was planted, "Move," you growled but he still didn't budge, "Go fuck a whore, Cross," you added shoving him back finally getting him to move, "if your so good in bed. Obviously to good to be interested in me and now your only doing it out of pride. Did you go to the med bay and grab some helpers? There was nothing last night between us, nothing... why would there be? I'm nothing but a barely hot piece of ass for you only when you want it," the words ripped from your throat as the tears came, "Just leave me alone." You ran from the room shaking locking yourself in one of the destruction rooms knowing after sadness always comes anger. You could hear Wrecker and Slick banging on the door you opened the panel and shot it a few times to keep Tech from overriding it. That should buy a least a while of peace and quiet. You curled yourself up on the floor and sobbed yourself back to sleep.

"Are you trying to break us up!" Crosshair shouted shoving Slick.

"You're doing that just fine on your own," he scoffed catching himself turning his attention back the door, "Going to have to blast it open?" He asked looking down at Tech.

"Yes, she has disrupted the signal on the other end."

"I'm not threw with you," Crosshair said yanking Slick again.

"We can have it out when I know she's okay, I actually care about her and I personally don't have time for your bantha crap until I know she's fine," Slick said walking over to the wall with a concealed Pod waking one of the droids, "Get the door open." Slick watched as droid punched the seam until there was a dent big enough for the droid to get his hands on and pry open.

Wrecker got to her first and checked her breathing and the undisturbed room, "She's asleep." Wrecker scooted you into his big arms, "You gave all of us a scare," he said listening to your breathing change.

"I just want to be alone."

"Well you can be alone in my arms but that's the most alone you're going to get."

"I rather be alone in bed, the floor isn't that comfortable," you said rolling your shoulder.

"I can put you in bed beautiful."

Crosshair watched Wrecker carry her off and how puffy her face one, "I do not know how to assist," Tech standing next him also watching.

"We'll deal with it when we go home," Hunter chimed in, "Just need to get our heads on straight for the mission ahead as much as I want to solve it now there's not enough time."

Crosshair took out the toothpick and flicked it into the room, "We're soldiers, we pick ourselves and move on," his words didn't match what was going on in his head. His trained cool demeanor refused to display his personal feelings. He felt the eyes on him but he followed after Wrecker ignoring the glare as he picked up his armor attaching it, after his helmet sealed shut he grabbed his Firepuncher taking a glance to see the silent sobbing. He took himself down to the shuttle letting himself have a single tear before focusing on his drilled in task of cleaning and prepping his weapon.

"Everyone is in the shuttle, we got to go," Slick said disturbing their slight embrace.

You had long since stopped crying and hoped your face was half presentable as you walked into the shuttle taking the seat next to Hunter as Slick and Reef took the pilot chairs. You fiddled repositioning your sabers time counting the minutes.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Slick asked hoping you hadn't lost your nerve.

"I can't wait to watch it burn at my feet," the cruel sweetness came back to your voice and he smiled.

"I'll happily watch anything that upsets you burn at your feet," he replied, "especially if your in heels"

"I wouldn't have it any other way my knight," you purred standing up resting your elbows on his and Reef's shoulder, "Everything is position?" your regular voice returning.

"The rendezvous ship is 25 minutes out of sensor range, that provides us with enough time to disrupt and destroy."

"For Echo," you whispered returning to your seat, pulling the other saber out of the nap sack with your armor, you kissed it placing it back in the bag, "Techno Union is about to learn you will reap what you sow", you whispered letting every once of rage lace it "I think I'm going to make an entrance, see you boys when you catch up!" You laughed skipping your way to the exit door and opening it, grabbing the lid off of a crate and stepping out tugging the door shut behind you.

"She is falling at terminal velocity towards a solid mass, she is going to die!" Tech said standing up but Wrecker shoved him back down. Slick clicked his tongue, "She'll be fine, she did it all of the time and usually from higher up. It's a very effective technique. Well you boys should know by now the Jedi like the fall and jump from deadly heights," wish more of them were finale, he mentally added.

"Effective in doing what? Running a high probability of dying?" Tech asked staring with his head slightly cocked.

"Intimidation," Crosshair said flatly.

"So he does still have a tongue," Slick joked, "Alright boys getting ready to touch down... She's fine... in more ways that one," He laughed watching her ass sway in the heels walking towards the main door with the two guards in tow, "Maker made that one just for us clones," he whistled, "Touch down. Waiting for her signal," almost on que the she pushed the door open, "Okay three minutes," Slick said putting on his helmet and jogging after her making some excuse as to what took him so long to catch up.

"You good, Cross?" Hunter asked as soon as Slick had caught up.

"Yes," he said tartly.

"You could just stay-" Wrecker started.

"Shut up."

The guard had bought the story about a surprise inspection given the possibility of contracting them for a new task. You casually looked at everything as he went through the tour noticing the exits, cameras and blind spots. The job seemed to easy, shouldn't this place be more fortified? Although we are in the most protected and dangerous place in the outer rim. Three minutes were almost up. You nonchalantly asked to be directed to the bathroom was Slick distracted the man. You reached the bathroom and hit the signal for Tech to tap in remotely as they made their entrance. Camera's should start rolling off. Now for business. You stride out of the bathroom and heard the fun at had started. Guards were running which ever way and Slick and the head of the building had made there way to you telling you go to safety. Slick winked and you followed after both of them.

Crosshair found you and sneaking up the crosswalk above, being up high was currently the only comfort he had. He'd always love being up high in secluded spaces, it always eased his mind but his brain was still rattled from earlier as much as he tried to shove it from his thoughts. He waited and waited until he saw the smile on your face and your sabers sizzle to life. Aiming he raised his fire puncher but within moments you had already cleared the room.

"Next room, darling?" You purred to Slick already kicking the door open.

"No one stood a chance," he chuckled.

"No one ever stood a chance against my resolve."

Slick joined the dance clearing every room of every living thing while listening to the droids start ripping up and destroying equipment, "Everything seems to be on schedule," Slick muttered as your face went white as both of you made your way to the lab, "Scratch that." Both you looked at the assorted Troopers hooked up to various machines more experimented on.

"Hunter we need Tech in the lab, now," You shouted he could hear you over the sound of blaster fire and the shredding of metal. Your fingers danced quickly over the keys able to disconnect a few of the disoriented soldiers. It seemed like forever but Tech and Crosshair stepped through the door.

"Is there enough room on the shuttle?" Tech asked working quickly.

"Slick, plan C."

"I farking hate plan C," he said jogging off.

When the technicians came for their experiments Crosshair watched you dispatch them ruthlessly mocking up as they were cut to bits. It made his stomach turn. His eyes flicked up to Slick waving, quickly he watched you move the troopers onto one of the beds and push the bed towards him working on the next set as Tech finished. Tech looked down at the last soldier pulled the plug and moved on. Crosshair eyes scanned the screen, there was nothing that could have been done. His lips twitched with bitterness but starting picking up stray guards as they came in from behind.

"May I inquire what plan C is?" Tech said putting his data away and grabbing his blaster.

"Mildly plummeting to the world below and hoping she's angry enough to play catch."

Crosshair cocked his head, I'm surprised the building isn't falling already. Hunter and Wrecker were catching up destroying everything that even looked remotely electronic on there way down.

"I think she's angry," Wrecker said looking at the carnage.

"They were experimenting on Trooper's, I do not think angry covers it," Tech said.

Hunter shook his head, the four of them jogging after them. Hunter used her scent to track were they had gone finding them in one huge lab like the one they pulled Echo out of, "It's empty," he said.

"Just means they were going to try again," you growled looking at the technology, "Grab any thing important you can off of it."

Tech went to work pulling information files off of it while deleting them afterwards, "Done."

You put your sabers away and unloaded your blaster in the machine, "Die," you said blasting more then Slick's hand went to your face distracting you, "We have to move," he said letting go, "Echo would be happy if he saw that."

"I'll show him when we get home."

"Thanks, Tech," you said smiling, "I appreciate it."

He nodded. Tech watch you waltz from the room getting on your com to the droids when they started exploding, "We're out of time!"

"Slick, take them and go!"

"We're not-"

"Wrecker..." you asked looking at him, he gave a disappointed nod scooping up Hunter and grabbing Tech before he had time to move, "Get going, I'll get the injured." You noticed Crosshair didn't move as Wrecker moved to the door waiting, "Crosshair we can do this my way or Slicks way." Again he didn't move, "Forgive me," you begged watching in slow motion as Reef fell from the ceiling dropping him to the floor giving Slick enough time to hit the seal of his helmet and injected him. You saw the look of guilt hidden in his eyes before Slick put the helmet back on and tossed him over his shoulder.

Aren't I the one whose suppose to be apologizing? Crosshair thought as the tranq slammed into him.

Echo opened the priority hologram of Cody, "Echo? Where's Reaper... and everyone else it's morning?"

"There out on assignment, it's just me. Anything I can do to help you?"

"We just got a batch of injured from an outpost in the outer rim... They described her perfectly, a trader brought them in however."

Echo's hands tighten, "They were all out there," he said swallowing.

"Don't go getting any bright ideas, they'll turn up they probably just had to finish whatever it was. They just wanted to say thank you."

Echo looked down to see Hunter's homing button  blinking, "Have to go, they're back. I'll let her know, Commander," he said switching it off, "I don't have a good feeling about this," he muttered to Gonky who gave a concerned gonk.

Echo tracked the signal back to the border finding the white shuttle waiting. He docked the Marauder, opened the door and waited the moment he saw Hunter and Wrecker's faces he knew something was grow. However Tech's and Crosshair's were unreadable.

"Where's Reaper?" Echo asked staring at Slick's emotionless expression.

"With the soldier's... she's not back yet?" His expression going pale.

Echo fell in the seat next to him with a thud, "They made it... she wasn't with them."

There was a heavy silence between all of them before Slick broke it, "I'll get back and if I find her.. I know how to get ahold of you."

"If we find her, we'll let you know," Hunter confirmed, both of them pulling the doors shut to disembark, "We'll find her Echo."

"Unlikely, it was a two rotation journey. She most likely got incinerated catching them or succumbed to whatever injuries after getting them to safety."

"Tech!" Hunter snapped.

"I am not going to provide false hope, we all have to look at the facts and the statistics of her survival is less then minimal to none."

"For someone who was so broken about her leaving, you seem fine," Wrecker muttered.

"I am... adapting. We are soldiers, we adapt and move on. Its not that I am not hurt, but I know with our short lives if she has perished I will see her again one day and when that time comes I do not want to be lectured for letting my emotions get the better of me, again," he paused to collect himself, "If it was her final wish to get us to back to the republic... I will not allow her sacrifice to be for nothing. I will continue my duty as she would have wanted."

Plan 99, they all thought. Crosshair disappeared to his bunk. He sneered hearing Hunter behind him. He tossed his rifle in his bunk and plopped down next to it, "Leave me alone," he send pulling his privacy curtain.

"Crosshair, we both know she was upset when she said that. She loved you" Hunter said running his fingers along his bandana, even after all of that he could still faintly smell her on it, "We all saw it when she looked at you."

Wrecker bear hugged Echo, "We'll be okay." He tighten his grip as Echo tried to maneuver out of it, "Nope. Just accept the hug," that comment got through to him and he melted again, Wrecker finally set him down, "I'll go keep my eyes on brainy, since he still has stuff stashed on board."

Echo stood outside their room and rested his head on the door, I've lost so many brothers in this war and now possibly her. He pulled himself off knowing Tech was right about carrying on, he grabbed the crystal around his neck and put himself in his bunk which got a surprised look from Hunter. We're all hurting just in our own ways, I can't go in there yet.

Tech sat at the pilot seat putting his feet up with his arms folded over his chest as he stared out the window seeing a new message coming from Cody. He flipped it out not even nothing to look at him.

"I take it she didn't make it...?" Cody asked.

"Reaper is Missing in Action," Tech reported, "Yet to be seeped Killed in Action."

"What we're you guys even doing out there? There was no assignment out that far."

"We... brought down the Techno Unions Lab, the report should be available. Clone intelligence should already be investigating."

"I assumed but why?"

"Their was reasonable suspicion they were abducting clones in attempts to make another... 'algorithm' which we concluded to be true."

"Protecting us clones," Cody said shaking his head, "the only way I could have ever seen her going out. Has anyone told Wolffe?"

"No, it is our responsibility to tell him so, the others will probably want to refrain for a few days to confirm that she didn't find an alternate mode of transportation."

"Should still tell him, Tech."

"I will take it under advisement," Tech said before Cody cut off the communication.

"I'm not looking forward to that call," Wrecker muttered.

"I will do it, if there is not objections Hunter?"

Hunter commed that it would be the best if he did. He sat on his bunk listening to the anger in his voice then flatness when Tech mentioned duty. It pissed him off, but Tech was correct which passed him off more. Hunter heard him say keep him apprised and Tech signed off. He took off his bandana and clenched it in his hand, Hunter didn't want to give in to the possibility but knew there was no running from the truth that the probability was slim even for a Jedi. Hunter bolted up right and pulled Crosshair's curtain but to find his emotions rolling down his cheeks and fall down them to hiss pillow. He stepped back knowing the look of the coiled snake waiting to strike.

Crosshair yanked the curtain shut again but didn't say anything, already torn but aggravated at the lack of privacy from his brothers when he needed it. Move on, pick your self up and move on. You got it out of your system. He wiped what was left of his emotions off his face and pulled the curtain back hoping down to grab food. He felt Hunter's eyes when the hair on the back of his neck stood up but he wouldn't give him any further satisfaction of seeing him compromised. Grabbing food he sat down next to Tech and Wrecker staring out the view wondering if there a deeper meaning to Forgive me, what you said? Having Slick drug me? Knowing he'd have too? Not making up before the battle? He groaned his head swimming again, he moved himself to her room retaking his position on the floor staring at the bed and the fresh armor on it.

Echo spent the next three nights sleeping his bunk with his brothers, Wrecker this time seeking the solace of her room, even Gonky came in and joined them. He spent every day looking at the sensors for any sliver of hope whether it was his shift or not when he was finally going to give up a huge gold ship dropped in-front of them with the Tomb's crest. The ship put a tractor beam and pulled them to the docking port.

Hunter was the first to enter the ship to find Indel staring at him, surprised she's allowed to leave. The rest of the squad filed onto the ship unaware of what they would be doing all the way out here however the look in Indel's face gave him a sliver of hope. He watched her point her finger at Echo and extend her hand, he walked Echo freeze his hand holding it but he reluctantly gave it back watching Indel put the saber by together.

"Whole once again," she said looking specifically at Echo, "Balance requires two, saber and user or man and machine however together they make a whole," she said handing the saber to him, "once again you are whole."

Echo stared at the saber, "She's gone isn't she?" he whispered.

Indel let out a short laugh, "Did you not hear a word I said child. Come."

You groaned, "Touch each finger to your thumb, good, wiggle your toes," Asclepios repeated every motor skill practice several times a day then moved on to practical making you walk and eventually run a simple obstacle course, "I don't think you missed anything," you complained.

"Master, it is part of my training don't you forget," she jokingly snipped back making you do it all over again, "it looks like it is time to go home," she said looking up at the observation window to Indel and the Squad looking down, "Can you see them?" she asked.

"I don't need too, I can sense them. Any more test or can I get out of this.. hospital gown, this shade of yellow is not my color."

"Let's one through the test one more time, to put on a show as you would say."

"Might as well give you your second saber, you catch up fast," you said sarcastically, "Thank you for putting me back together."

"It is my duty, but I am glad I sensed it and came as fast as I could for my friend."

Hunter unknowingly put his hand on the glass, stepping forward staring down watching every bodily movement intensely not believing she was still alive. Tech wide eyed starred in disbelief wondering if she enjoyed rewriting the laws of physics. Wrecker jumped saying he knew it, she was to bad ass to be dead. Echo stared at the saber finally understanding what Indel meant, he saw her smile at his understanding. Crosshair stood there silently observing. They all followed Indel lead them to the medical room after you concluded your test.

"It will gradually come back more with time" Asclepios tried reassuring by the time the door opened, "just have patience, Master. You have guest behind you waiting."

"How could I not know their loud," you chuckled turning around, "Clone Force 99, Cody spoke a lot about you."

"Master, that isn't funny," both of you started laughing enough for Indel to cough, "well maybe a little."

"Do you think she is well enough to... go home?" Indel asked.

"No, but I grant her permission. I do not think this facility is equipped to keep her contained much longer," she said helping you off the observation table, "I think a familiar area... will help."

"So be it, you may... take her home."

Asclepios anxiously released her hold on you watching you take a few steps towards them. All of them were scared to touch you not wanting to break down and make a sense. You were thankful for the cluster around you using them as a guide by to the ship, you missed the step up and felt Crosshair's grasp on you to steady you then quickly release as you got into the Marauder. Your hand went to the wall of the ship, "Been awhile," you whispered guiding yourself to your room. "I think... She's blind?" you heard Hunter questionably whisper, but pretended to ignore it but your spike in heart rate proved to him other wise. Your hands grabbed your armor and moved it gently to the floor and sat at the end of the bed, "Did I miss anything fun?" you asked looking up at the them.

"No, however excuse me, I need to alert Cody, Wolffe and Slick you have been found," Tech said pulling himself away unsure how to proceed with Hunter's insight.

You felt Echo's arm snake around you and Wrecker pull you back into his abdomen, "My favorite pillow."

Hunter climbed up and joined them, he leaned forward and sniffed her. The calm relaxing scent of her finally letting him relax. He swiped the bandana back and forth on her head recoating the comforting smell back on it before burying his face in her neck.

You felt Crosshair still sitting over on the floor when you heard Tech join him down there. "What's with the silence? Did you honestly think that was enough to take me out?" You anxiously laughed trying to break the eerie silence when you felt Echo's fingers on your lips. Oh... they did. You kissed his fingers he moved grabbing you by the waist, "Well.. I'm home" You offered, "although I don't know how much longer I can lay down, when I wasn't doing stupid test I was laying. It get's pretty boring after.. well I don't know how many rotations it's been."

"Technically Six."

"It felt like forever... I need to get out of this gown, this is not a flattering shade of yellow."

"Reaper... it's red," Hunter whispered pulling up kissing the top of your forehead, getting up and digging through your civvies for something comfortable comforting.

"Of course that's what I meant," you scowled annoyed that she didn't correct you on the color, wondering if she had hoped that you would point it out and they would notice.

"We can tell," Echo whispered.

"It's temporary," you said giving up the charade.

"How bad was it?" Tech inquired getting angrily glared at at his poor timed question.

"I didn't ask. She would have to tell me the truth and I'm not ready to admit I'm mortal quite yet," you said smiling trying to be in good spirits over it, "Wait you contacted Slick?" you asked confused.

"Yeah, we've each spent the last 4 days looking for you," Hunter said sitting you up attempting to put clothes on you and failing.

Another set of hands gently touched and moved you, Crosshair wasn't ready to speak but was tired with Hunter's effable attempt. As much as it amused him to watch Hunter fail at such a simple task, he didn't want you to get cold given how cold their ship was compared to one you were on.

"How about 79's? It theoretically should be a slow day and it is... quiet familiar?" Tech asked getting up.

"I would appreciate it."

"You're quiet," you said touching Echo. He spotted your face in kisses, "I can't believe your alive" He offered, "You should have known," he blinked times "How?" You laughed feeling his neck for the crystal realizing it had probably been returned "It would have chipped and eventually broke," you said, "The balance destroyed."

Wrecker shifted and Echo pulled you tight against him wrapping his legs around yours, "I am glad you're alive, Riduur."

"I'm happy I am too, just no babying me. Every thing is hazy and colors are wrong but I'm not defenseless."

"You're taking the fun out of it," Hunter said caressing your cheek.

"Awwwe, can I carry you around at least?" Wrecker asked.

"Yes you can big boy," you smiled, "I can't see the ground anyway."

"But that course?" Hunter asked.

"It's a force sensitivity course, not quite your eye day training course."

"I love you," Echo whispered holding you a little tighter.

"I love you too but you're squishing me, Corporal," you said tapping his arm, he let go apologizing putting you on your back speckling more of your face with kisses, "You're cute when you worried."

"Not funny," he said grumpily.

You brought your lips to his wondering why he hadn't yet, putting your hand on his feeling the tenderness and longing. Every kiss was firm so incredibly soft, he pulled back and kissed your nose with a chuckle, "Is there something wrong with my lips, she said there only be faint scaring-" you said if then Hunter's hand grabbed your chin and pulled you towards him, "There's nothing wrong them, we're just to busy staring at your beauty thanking the maker your still fighting," he said giving one kiss. He watch the red creep into your face, "I was jealous that first time seeing the reg making you this pretty color," he whispered letting the back of his finger stroke the blush.

"Jealous? That's cute," you giggled like a little school girls pretty sure made him roll your eyes, "Okay I'm tired of laying down," you said making yourself sit up, Wreckers arms picked you up and you felt him drag you to the pit and set you down in one of the seats, "Can't see much but much better."

Crosshair was still quite but he cautiously handed you a cup of water and wrapped your fingers around it and returned to his position on the outskirts of the room continuing his perch observation. He saw her look down at the cup at him and down at it.

"Water," Echo said, "Drink it."

"I know what it is," you said before chugging it, "I just said not to baby me."

"It's Crosshair's day, let him have it," Hunter said.

"I can't believe I was gone that long..."

"We'll your back now," Wrecker said , "We're all glad you're back."

"I'm glad to be back." Even if there is still unspoken conversation that needs to be had. You felt Crosshair's eyes watching you as Echo knelt before and placed his head on your lap.

"I'm not sure if your outfit is 79's entire," he joked feeling the cool pajamas against his skin.

"Can pick something out for me then," you offered rubbing his shoulders.

You sensed Crosshair move out of the room, "Is there a reason he's not saying anything?" you whispered.

"He.. dealt with it in his own way, he's more quiet then usual," he said standing you up and guiding you back to where Cross was waiting

He picked a simple outfit and flat shoes, he left his gloves on as he moved about your body changing the poorly chosen outfit. He still didn't know what to say. He felt you grip him and pull him closer the moment he finished putting on the shirt, he went as stiff as piece of plastoid as she wrapped her arms around him. She took a few moments of just embracing that she pulled back navigating herself out of the room. He quietly followed after her positioning him in the further chair away from her.

Tech looked back and stared at her, studying the void expression in her face as she rested her head on her knee letting the other leg dangle down. He turned his attention back to his piloting, What do I even say that hasn't been said yet? Do I even need to say anything? What do you even say to some thing like that? I don't know what type of reaction I should have or what would be deemed suitable. Do I need to get adjust to having her around again?

"Tech, I know you think a lot but you're loud."

"Apologies," He felt her hands run through his hair, a simple pleasurable gesture acknowledging him, "Can I be of assistance?" he asked wondering if the touch was more for his sake or her own. He heard her mutter no and shuffle away, he was tempted to turn and ask if she understood but he was flying. If it was a miscommunication, I will correct it when we land. The rest of the flight was semi quiet besides the attention she was receiving from Wrecker, Hunter and Echo. Tech side eyed his aloof brother who was in thought pretending to clean his armor even if it was the twelfth time this week, it had become apparently it was his way of being be present yet alone with himself.

Wrecker carefully walked you off the Marauder before picking you up and placing you on his shoulder finally have head clearance, "I know you can't see that far.. or good? but does it feel nice?" he asked looking up.

You thumbed the back of his skull, "Feel on top of the world," you stated, you looked down observing the orange outline of him no features you returned your eyes back to the world around you, "Wonder how long it's going to last," you muttered missing people watching, enjoying the simple things outside of the battlefield.

"Hopefully not much longer," Hunter said guessing what you were talking about.

As Wrecker brought her down off his shoulder Hunter put his hands on her waist to stabilize her watching Echo grab ahold of her hand. Hunter kept a hand on her waist gently maneuvering her through the crowd to repeatedly empty booth, Probably because it's the one we sit in, he thought already noticing the Reg's expressions already. Echo kept their hands together sliding into the booth, Hunter smiled he's not going to let her go for awhile. He saw Tech's hesitation of sliding in next to her so he took the spot, the flash of relief in his face made him wonder what he was thinking about earlier but she didn't seem to notice. Wrecker slide in next to Echo letting Crosshair be the last to sit so he had to get drinks, opting for water for Tech and himself.

"Look what the loth dragged in," you heard the familiar cadence of Cody's voice. You step up unto the table, accidentally jolting Echo's arm up before releasing him to jump at Cody only half colliding with him, "When did you start missing?" He laughed but saw the tight faces, "I knew you would be fine," he said changing the subject.

"We'll I'm glad someone believed in my immortality," you joked, "A couple scraps and bruises but nothing major."

"Besides-" Tech started feeling a tug from Hunter, "the temporary blindness," he said feeling it was his responsibility to tell him because no one was apparently going too.

"Was wondering what saved my skull from throbbing for the next couple hours," he said, "Small price for immortality," he joked.

You threw an arm around his neck and got him with your knuckles, "Still got you, Commander," you laughed.

"Very funny, General," he groaned swatting at your hand until you quit, "Next rounds on me, mind if I sit with you boys? Someone's looking a little lonely without ya," he joked looking at Echo quickly realizing it wasn't a joke.

Wrecker stood up snatching you putting you back besides Echo, who's hand found yours, "Thank you," you said stroking Wrecker's receding hand, "Missed me that much?" You whispered, his squeeze answering. The boys chatted about the adventure, you occasionally chimed in but focusing on trying to make out the figures around you.

"Straining yourself is only going to be make the healing prolong," Tech said observing the occasional squints and stares.

"Thanks, captain obvious," you said rolling your eyes, "It's been a week, worried it's not going to come back."

"I don't think the Republic would have any objection to giving you cybernetic ones after all you've done," Cody offered, "Still mad I wasn't invited," he said darting eye between the both of you.

"None of us were invited," Hunter chuckled taking a drink squeezing his hand on your thigh, "However we were invited to the after party," he smirked.

"La la la la, shut up," Cody laughed, "She's practically my sister I don't need to know more than I already do."

"The only reg not interested," Wrecker laughed squishing him, "Is Cody defective?" he asked realizing how weird it was.

"I won't take offense to that," he breathed out while being squished, Wrecker released him apologizing.

Echo and Hunter silently communicated with a smirk forcing Tech and Crosshair to scoot to let the three of you out. You followed them intrigued until letting them guide you over the dance floor, "Wonder who was going to have first dance," you laughed.

"I'm your GAR issued backpack," Echo joked pressing himself up against your back as Hunter stole both of your hands, "I'm not the standard model however it comes with other upgraded perks."

"ECHO!" You said falling forehead in Hunter chest with laughter until your face hurt. You felt both of their amusement seeing you genuinely happy, "Death by humor, not the way I thought I'd go," you laughed feeling the tenderness in your ribs.

"I thought you'd like it," he said watching you weakly compose yourself, "I love your laugh Riduur... I missed it."

"It's a beautiful sound," Hunter agreed looking down at you, you must have sensed him because he saw you look up to him, "Missed you."

"I missed you too, Hunter... how many people are staring?"

"A few, you are between two men-," Hunter's eyes flicked up barely hearing Crosshair voice at the counter then a woman talking to him.

"They've been there for a while," you said, "Crosshair can do whatever he wants."

"I think you two-"

"It's fine, Hunter," you said pulling him close burying your face in his chest, "I told him too remember?" You whispered.

"You didn't mean-"

"Didn't I? The Crosshair I met would have yelled at me for telling him something like that.." you said trying to convince yourself you were okay, "I think we can figure out something if he ends up with other plans," you offered.

Hunter and Echo exchanged concerned glances, "if he does," Hunter finally said to fill the gap in silence. He knew his brother use to be something of a player and wonder if he was just up to old behavior or just being Crosshair trying to make her jealous, "I think I'll leave you two alone for a little bit, I need some water," Hunter said leaning down kissing you, "I won't be gone long," he added spinning you towards Echo, "Keep her entertain, Corporal," he laughed making his way to the bar.

"With pleasure," Echo got into the grove with the music stepping and twirling you when he saw openings that wouldn't lead into you crashing into someone, "Tech showed me the footage," he said pulling you close, "All of it.."

"Hope you enjoyed watching the show," you rolled your eyes not liking where this was going, watching the seriousness spread across his face, "There is nothing Asclepios can't fix, I'm okay Echo," the seriousness stayed, "I promise, no more nightmares."

"Okay," he said pulling you tighter resting his chin on your forehead, "Are... we okay?"

"I don't know... the lack of kissing is kind of frustrating," you admitted touching his face feeling the doubt, "We're okay, Riduur," you felt the kiss at the temple and he slowly worked his way down. His lips were cool to the touch seemingly to barely be breathing as he finally kissed you in earnest. It sent a little shiver through your body, it wasn't fluster or want by his but need to have himself by your side and to know you were okay. You gently put your hands one the sides of neck gently rubbing your thumbs on his cool skin, "Are you okay?" you asked feeling his heart beat pick up.

"All of you left, the moment they came back I knew someone thing had gone wrong... I had four long days of trying to come to terms with the fact I would never see you again."

"It wouldn't have been your fault, Echo, protecting you and this squad is my duty. I would do it again in a heart beat regardless of what happened to me at the end of it. Bond or not, it would have just been a matter of time before I handled them anyway."

"I know you would, that's who you are Reaper," he staring at Crosshair brooding next to them with his arm crossed waiting, "We can pick this up later, I think someone wants to cut in," Echo gave you a little spin towards him kissing your neck, "I'll go see where Hunter wandered off too," he said hoping the two of you would make up.

The dance was silent and slightly out of sync, which was fitting for the situation. Date didn't want to dance with your poor attitude? You bit your tongue not to make the situation worse.

Hunter watched the bar waiting for the next round of drinks, I don't who looks more uncomfortable. He peaked over at the table watching Cody entertain Tech and Wrecker with cards smiling at how simple it had been to finally get them all to relax, well almost all of them.

Crosshair rolled his toothpick side to side in his mouth before lowering his mouth sliding the dry side into your mouth. He never shared his toothpicks with anyone. It was a small deeply intimate gesture that didn't go unnoticed by his squad, "That's never happened before," he heard Tech's shocked voice in the distance. He wanted to smirk but he kept himself composed watching you roll it accidentally drop it. His hand flew to catch it and returned it to your mouth.

"Seeing Crosshair.. soft, might scare me more then when she's angry," Echo joked.

"That makes two of us," Cody said pulling his eyes away, "Surprised she didn't punch him for talking to that woman at the counter."

"I would assume she is only entertaining him because it is his day, presumably she is more then likely fuming underneath," Tech offered, "Although he had not said a word to her since we picked her up she might also be under the assumption they are over given their last interaction therefore dancing with him as a way to conclude their relationship. It is an odd thing some people do that I have found from my research a good bye kiss or one last date, I don't understand the behavior but I could hypothetically see why it could be therapeutic."

"How do you even breath when talking so fast?" Wrecker asked.

"I am accustomed to giving long winded speeches."

"I hate to tell ya Tech, but I think your dead wrong for once," Wrecker said watching them, "Ha, Tech being wrong that would be a first."

"I said assume, I didn't say it was it was fact therefore I wouldn't be wrong but nice attempt."

You could feel Crosshair's eyes staring at you, your heart was still racing and your mouth was dry. You tilted your head up offering the toothpick back feeling him take it hesitantly. He noticed how dry your end was and cautiously pulled you back through the crowd motioning the squad to scoot together and pouring up us glass of water. You took it and sipped on it, feeling all of them still staring between you and Crosshair. It's going to be a long day... or night whichever it is. Anxious about the tension you ended up coughing, water going down the wrong way which ended up making you cough more. You felt his hand firmly patting you until the water dislodged. Can today get any more embarrassing? It did you ended up spilling the part of the water on the the table. "Ugh!" You spatted. One handed Cross brought your wrist together holding them above the table while he wiped it up. Your face was burning.

"Yeah it's scarier," Cody coughed up trying to hide the smile to Echo.

Crosshair squinted glaring at him as he released your hands watching them quickly pull into your lap. Ah, it's me. He let out a long exhale forcibly moving Tech in between both of you. He scowled watching his brother to busy on his pad to care, he stomped his foot and stared at him which made him finally put it down.

Looked at you abnormally shut in, Tech turned side ways and covered you with one leg wrapping his arm around you, "It is not as uncomfortable as it looks," he whispered, "I am... unsure how to proceed it seems like I have to re-adjust to you being alive."

"It's okay, Tech," you said leaning your head on his shoulder, "I am glad you didn't cave to... past habits."

"I assumed as much. Being scolded in the afterlife didn't seem like a pleasurable way to spend it."

"I only would have spent.. maybe a year scolded you," you joked, "I could think of quiet a few other pleasurable ways to spend it," you whispered.

"I think I may need a reminder at a later juncture."

"I haven't been that long," you poked.

"No however I thought it would be prudent to get accustom to repressing that.. need again" he said quickly adding "Nothing of ours was deleted, Cyar'ika."

You turned his face towards yours kissing him, he fumbled at first before slipping his leg off and sliding you into his lap allowing himself to enjoy it. You ran your fingers to comb his hair tracing the band his goggles, giggling a little when you felt his tongue press again your lips. You parted your lips allowing him to enter and his arms hold you a little tighter, once he was satisfied in his inspection he ran his tongue over your teeth one last time before detangling your mouths. As much as he was trying to hide how hard he was breathing but you could feel it and something else pressing into you.

"How's that repressing working for you," you murmured.

"Breached," he whispered, "I will attempt to gather myself... apologies again if it's uncomfortable."

"It's cute," you said wiggling a little bit hearing him exhale a tiny moan, "I hope you recorded that just for me."

"It is always recording," he said tartly taking a drink of water hiding his embarrassment about the outburst.

"Get a room," Cody joked just to get glared at by Crosshair, "on second thought more drinks?"

Hunter patted his big and followed him over the counter, "Wolffe joining us?" he asked.

"No he's out on assignment, but he'll meet up with you as soon as possible. I suspect all of you are going to get an earful even if you didn't let her go alone."

"Next time he can go with her," Hunter chuckled, "It was... quiet the nightmare," he admitted, "Out there..."

"She becomes a different person?" Cody arched an eyebrow, "I am quiet aware. She is balance... there's our side of her and then the side you never want to be the target of.  After Wolffe got injured... it took a whole squad of us to take her down after chasing Ventress across the planet it made the battle itself look like hologame."

"What a woman," Hunter said leaning against the counter watching her tease Tech and watching Crosshair feign indifference, "Glad to know she's on our side and came back to us."

"I'd hate to know what would happen if she wasn't."

Hunter carried the drinks over, wrinkling his nose at the arousal coming off them. He scolded them and told them to knock it off. You laughed at the expression on Tech's face as he dug his fingers into your thigh taking several deep breaths. You brought your hand to his face feeling the relaxation wash over him and he unburied his hand, fiddling with his goggles. Wrecker laughed at how normals things seemed to be and how happy all of them seemed. On a whim Tech put you between him and Crosshair, you wrapped your ankle around Tech's. Hunter looked at Tech scoldingly but understood what he attempting to test. Echo covered a groan watching the woman Crosshair talked to earlier walk over towards them.

"Pleasure doing business with you handsome," she winked pushing the package and drink towards Crosshair before waltzing off.

Crosshair gridded his teeth and slammed the drink, pushing it towards the edge of the table and felt the smack from Wrecker, "Not your usual type maybe next time don't do your business with her around," Wrecker said pointing at you.

"He doesn't need to hide it," you said crawling over Tech, "I need to go to the refresher."

"I'll help-"

"I know where it is, Hunter," you said letting your finger tips touch the wall counting foot steps between booths towards the quiet part we're the refreshers we're.

They all sat there staring at him for several minutes before the tension finally erupted "What we're you thinking," Hunter growled standing up putting his palms on the table to stare down at him, "You didn't need wipe it in her face, I don't care how good you are in bed but you don't need your flings to wipe it in her face-."

Crosshair growled sliding the box towards him, "Open it."

Hunter glared at him but grabbed the box and sat back down and carefully opened the box exposing a locket. He carefully picked it up, staring at it seeing the engraving of all of their names on it and opened it to a hologram picture popping up of the five of them together some time after that rescued Echo. Hunter tucked it back in the box and slid it back to Crosshair, turning his head to the refresher and then back to him, "Do you realize how bad that looked?" he said frustratedly.

"I can't just walk into the women's refresher, Hunter," Crosshair growled.

"I believe that was more words than you've said the past four days," Tech remarked, "Do you love her or not?" he said turning to stare scooting himself out of the booth.

"I don't run," Crosshair growled grabbing the box and headed to the refresher, "Coming in," he knocked ignoring the stares. He looked down to find you sitting on the floor, he knelt down next to you, "Not that type of business."

"He speaks," you said rubbing your eyes getting up hearing him do the same, can't even get a slice of privacy in the refresher, you purposely ducked through the crowd occasionally bumping into a few people attempting to sneak out for a moment alone.

Hunter watched you bolt from refresher and cut in the crowd, his heart skipping a beat before he saw Crosshair dart out his eyes finding you an instant and following after you. He slumped his head on the table and rolled it side to side, "Blind and still manages to cause problems," he muttered.

"Technically Crosshair caused it," Tech corrected.

"Shouldn't we go after her?" Wrecker asked, "ya know her eyes."

"Crosshair has exceptional eyes, he will not lose her," Tech countered, "however Wrecker may have a point" he said his eyes finding the door with a raised eyebrow.

"That didn't last long," Cody snickered watching Crosshair walk in carrying her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes with restraining bolts around your wrist and ankles, "He wasn't playing around."

"Rarely ever does," Hunter said looking up at the spectacle as he plopped her down at the booth, "Last I checked we're soldiers not bounty hunters."

Crosshair took off the wrist restraints and placed the box in your hand, "Made with pieces of our armor."

You were silent as you opened the box, feeling the heart shaped object. You brought up to your eyes squinting at it looking at the outline of possibly letters. You clicked it and a picture appeared, "It's of us," Crosshair said closing it and putting it around your neck and clasped it on.  He returned to his silent behavior pouring himself a glass of water.

They all waved as Cody said he had to head in for inspection wishing you a good rest of the evening. Echo coughed motioning for you to be placed by him, Wrecker obliged him. "Riduur," Echo smiled wrapping he arm around you and put his face in your neck, "Scare me again and be I'll be restraining you to me... or the bed," Echo laughed but the edge in his voice betrayed his concern.

Purposely you brought your fingers to this connections and stroked it once watching him shiver, "Is that even a punishment?" you laughed. Echo grabbed the restraints off of Crosshairs belt and put back on your wrist smirking, "It's going to be... at some point," Echo added seeing Crosshairs silent threat across his face.

The rest of the night Wrecker, Hunter and Echo had a little to much to drink finally relaxing after the days of stress leaving you, Crosshair and Tech sober. Drunkily Wrecker still managed to carry you to the ship laughing about the restraints. Crosshair scowled but took them off once he put you down letting Wrecker crash face first into the floor of the ship and pass out. Idiots. Tech helped Echo to his room placing him on the huge bed before proceeding to watch Crosshair carry Hunter to his bunk, "Don't do anythiiiing stupid," he tried to scold before laying back.

"Was I that annoying?" Tech asked.

"Yes."

They both looked at you, "What?" you asked feeling it.

[tranquilpetrichor]

take a break | ch. 2

synopsis: your ankle injury is a pain in the ass, but you find an unexpected source of comfort in a developing friendship with a teammate.

cast: ni-ki (enhypen) x reader ft. gunwook (zb1), soul (p1harmony), more to come

genre: dancer!au, hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, f2l

wc: 2.6k (2,677)

chapter warnings: mentions of injury, cursing, one joke about wanting to shit from fear

a/n: holy shit i'm just as sleepy as yn is here please do not follow our example. praying there aren't many typos. the lesson here? don't write when sleepy.

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finished with another day of school, you sit at home on your computer, attempting to do one more assignment so that you can think about something other than schoolwork.

eventually, you complete the last problem on the paper, and reward yourself by sitting on your bed. time to be lazy, you suppose.

you’re still surprised about your small, but meaningful interaction with ni-ki from the other day. shit, maybe your half-formed impression on his character, mostly formed by anecdotes from friends, was all wrong.

he’d actually texted you a couple times throughout the day, checking up on you and sending various videos (mostly dance ones) he enjoyed.

(of course, you always make sure to respond with texts expressing your gratitude. it was the least you could do for him.)

and you live vicariously through those videos, imagining that you're the one turning and flipping, even though your present physical state limits you from being able to fly like you knew you could.

it's painfully bittersweet to be so close to your craft, and yet so far. having feelings of jealousy seem inevitable.

patience, y/n. injuries don't heal overnight.

despite your sadness, you had to find the good somehow. it wasn't fair to mope around and be sad while everyone else worked hard. you decide to call your friend hikaru (who also happened to be on your dance team) and see how she was doing—hopefully she was available.

unsurprisingly, she took the call in a matter of seconds, her cheery voice ringing through the speaker.

"hi y/n! are you at home right now?"

you sigh. "yeah. just finished a nasty set of math problems, and i needed a break."

"ouch. well, you always know that i'll be here if you need anything! how's your ankle?"

you look over at your theraband, neatly situated next to your dance bag. "eh, i'm doing my best with physical therapy but not being able to dance is such a drag. at least the injury isn't getting worse."

"that's good! just keep resting—and i know you'll be shaking your head at me, i know you too well. but you need rest."

she pauses for a second or two, and then starts speaking again. "oh, yea, i'm curious. was that ni-ki talking with you the other day at practice?"

you readjust your sitting position and respond. "mhm. said he likes my notes and wants to talk to me more. i'm surprised, he's texted me a couple of times in these past 2 days alone and sent me dance videos—it's improved my mood quite a bit."

"ah, that's actually kinda cute," hikaru says.

"maybe he likes you," she adds afterwards, teasingly.

you roll your eyes, that girl always wants to be a matchmaker. "okay, hikaru. and pigs can fly."

even over the phone, you can picture her excited face. "i'm just saying! he really does seem to care about you."

another pause. "look, putting my teasing aside, i'm glad other people support you too, y/n. just don't ever forget it."

if she were here, you know you’d give her a proper hug right about now. "i won't. thanks for everything, bestie."

she laughs. "of course, and you can thank me by paying for a meal sometime."

with the typical banter between you two alive and well, you feel at least some sense of normalcy in your life.

the next day, you go to dance practice wishing you'd packed something for extra energy. you're yawning every few minutes and slapping yourself up to stay awake throughout the car ride to your studio. nevertheless, you show up 10 minutes early, notebook in hand, and prepare to get more work done.

you'd say you have a pretty good idea of everyone's habits when it came to arriving late, early or on the dot.

some people, like gunwook and hikaru, are already present, as you predicted beforehand, while others, like ni-ki, will show up about 2 minutes before practice is set to start. how he's comfortable doing that, you have no idea.

he waves to you shyly when he does come in, greeting you with a small "hi", and you wave back with a smile. almost everyone is present now, doing some pre-warmup stretches or just sitting and talking.

the booming voice of your director interrupts your thoughts. "alright, time for warmups!"

everyone shuffles around the room to find their happy spot as you stretch your arms gently toward the sky.

at one point, gunwook shoots you a concerned look that seems to ask “are you good?". however, you reassure him that you're fine with a thumbs up.

as you figure would be the case, he doesn't believe you and tosses you an extra energy bar during break, saying "you look as energetic as me during english class, go eat," before he goes to your director to ask a question.

you find your head threatening to slump forward, and you reach for your water, hoping it'll alleviate your drowsiness.

it helps a bit, and you just tell yourself that you'll get through this next hour, mostly because you're stubborn.

you watch the rest of the rehearsal without falling asleep, which you consider a win. but now you’re hungry, and a hungry y/n is never a fully productive one. you open your notebook, and realize just how uncharacteristically messy your notes were from today.

i should rewrite those... but that's for later.

after practice ends, you decide to get a snack at a nearby cafe that you like. since you can't drive as of right now (another thing you were annoyed about), it's your mom that takes you there.

you use this time to take a brief power nap, and although it's not the same as getting a proper night of sleep, it's something.

"be careful," your mom says, opening the door as you step out with your crutches. "i'll order something too—ugh. god knows i need a coffee."

you suppress a yawn and cautiously make your way over the curb. "alright, mom."

you enter the cafe, which isn't completely empty but also not too crowded. instinctively your eyes scan around, and you spot ni-ki at a table, already eating some type of dessert. he was here too?

you feel a little shy (mostly because you're with your mom) and avert your gaze, but he notices you, a look of surprise on his face.

"y/n?"

you look back at him, equally as surprised. "what a coincidence, didn't think i'd be seeing you here."

"uh, same. i've been here a couple times."

"you didn't tell me about this friend," your mom whispers, giving you a side eye. "i thought i finally knew about all of them."

you groan. telling your parents about stuff was always one of your least favorite things to do. "well, forgive me, but it was a recent friendship."

"oh, is that your mom?" ni-ki asks you politely.

"yep, it is."

"uh, hi ms. l/n. i'm nishimura riki, but everyone just calls me ni-ki," he says, giving her a small wave of the hand.

she smiles. "ah, nice to meet another friend of y/n's."

you look back and forth between the two. usually, your friends ended up meeting your parents when you already had a well-developed friendship, not when you had just started talking a few days ago.

the counter to order is empty, so you ask your mom if you can go over. "mom, what did you want to order? i can get it for you."

"it's alright. i'll order for you, i'm sure you'd want to talk with your friend, after all!"

your mouth widens slightly in surprise. "okay, then. i'll get the chocolate açaí bowl and a medium peach iced tea."

ah, parents. they lived to embarrass you sometimes, especially in front of people you knew.

well, it's not like you were in a rush to go anywhere. you carefully sit down across from ni-ki, setting your crutches behind your chair.

"so, how was practice for you today?" he asks.

you groan unintentionally. "honestly? i wanted to curl up and sleep. and then now i'm hungry."

he raises a single eyebrow. "bruh. you didn't bring anything to eat?"

"forgot. i usually remember, but i've felt off today."

okay, maybe you had slept a little late yesterday, but you didn't think it would be that much of a problem. it was necessary to prevent a backlog of tasks to do, you couldn't stand going to sleep knowing there were still things to complete.

ni-ki shrugs, and extends a spoon towards you. "i guess we all have our off days. oh yeah, do you want part of this pastry?"

you look at the chocolate-filled treat in front of you, your stomach doing more of the thinking than anything else. it couldn't hurt to eat a lot.

ugh, is there a word for being hungry and sleepy?

"oh," you respond rather abruptly, realizing you'd been thinking for a couple seconds too long. any longer, and you'd be off in dreamland. "sure. thanks again. chocolate is always a guilty pleasure of mine."

"no problem," he says with a tiny grin. "well... i'm curious. you like chocolate, but what do you think about mint chocolate?"

you pause to consider your answer. "it's alright. i wonder if anyone could convince me to order it, though. i usually just go for plain chocolate. why, are you the mint chocolate enjoyer?"

"of course. it's the superior ice cream flavor," he replies with a grin.

you shudder slightly. "people like you scare me."

just then, your mom comes back, setting a tray on the table. she grabs a croissant stored in a paper bag and her coffee, leaving the rest of the food for you.

"i'll be in the car, let me know if you need anything," she says, giving you a knowing glance that seemed to say 'i should leave you kids alone to have fun.'

"got it, i should be fine, but thank you."

you look back at her briefly as she walks towards the door, a sheepish grin on your face. "oh god, that was embarrassing. i didn't think you'd meet her so soon..."

"i know the feeling. whenever my parents asked to meet my friends, i almost wanted to shit in my pants from fear, haha. it's not like my friends are bad people, i didn't know if everyone would get along, you know."

you cackle, hoping the two employees working the counter don't care too much. "damn. that's some descriptive imagery..."

he scratches the back of his neck, probably out of embarrassment. "too much?"

you roll your eyes with a smile. "it was funny, so i'll let you off the hook."

swept up in conversation, you almost forget about the fact that you actually have more food to eat, but as always, your stomach serves as a reminder.

you stare at the bowl in front of you and pick up the spoon beside it. "oh yeah, i'd better dig in. this place has good food."

eager to satisfy your hunger, you start eating. the açaí bowl tastes as good as it usually did, but admittedly, all food seems to taste amazing when you're starving.

in any case, you're certainly in a better state of mind now. if you really thought about it, you could attribute part of it to food, and part of it to being here with a friend. the two of you continue to talk, and that's how you end up learning some more interesting facts about him.

these include things like his favorite color (black), his dog's name (bisco), and favorite season (spring). he even shows you some photos of bisco on his phone.

you can't help but comment. "aww, your dog is so cute! i wish i had one."

he laughs, swiping to a video of him playing with the dog.

"thanks, bisco's a little dumb sometimes, but adorable. he's growing pretty fast... time flies, i guess."

"it really does."

he's smiling at his photo gallery, and unintentionally, you find yourself smiling too. in the back of your mind, you make it your goal to meet bisco one day—you'd like to think you're popular with animals.

only when you finally look at your own phone do you realize how much time you've spent conversing with ni-ki—it's been over half an hour. by now, you've finished your food and drink, and feel ready to leave.

"i'm surprised my mom isn't yelling at me to come out," you say, carefully cleaning up the table. "although, i should probably go home anyways. where's your ride?"

"my sister's coming, she's actually a few minutes away." he holds up an app that you presume it's a location tracker. "yea, everyone in our family has this to keep track of where we are."

you nod, glancing at the moving dot that was indeed on a nearby street. "alright, i see. i just didn't want to leave you here alone."

he looks surprised, which you didn't quite expect, but a second later, his expression is nonchalant. "nah, i'll be fine, no worries."

"well, if you say so."

you stand up slowly, reaching for your crutches and positioning them so that you could start walking. even now, it was frustrating to think about how the smallest things, like a carpet or a slightly slippery floor, could impede your progress.

and usually, you'll power walk everywhere, but of course, you're in no state to do that just yet. you need to learn how to rely on yourself again and adapt to the situation.

ni-ki walks beside you silently, and somehow, you're less worried. of course, you're still cautious about walking, but it's nice to have someone near you in case of an emergency.

by the time you reach the door, ni-ki's already opened it. the act is surprising, but welcome nonetheless, considering how often people don't hold the door open anyways.

"thanks," you say with a smile.

"see you at practice?"

you nod, looking at your mom's car. "yeah, see you there. stay safe!"

"roger that," he says, as you make your way across the pavement.

you open the car door, swinging it as far wide as you can, and situate yourself against the car but facing away from it. like you learned from your physical therapist, you put both crutches in your right hand, holding on tightlyi

you reach out with your left hand, using the dashboard as support, and carefully lower yourself onto the car seat. you swing your left leg into the car, followed by your right.

at least i can do that on my own.

your mom greets you with a smile.

"well, you stayed out longer than i expected you to. but you're talking to people, that's good."

"mom, i'm not a hermit."

she starts up the car and slowly backs out of the parking space.

"i know, honey. but i sleep well at night knowing you have good friends. life's quite harsh sometimes, but you don't have to be alone in that struggle."

you nod in understanding. she definitely understands a lot more about life than you do.

if only you had your mom's wisdom all the time. you've never wanted to burden others with your problems, hoping that you could shoulder them yourself instead of having people take pity on you.

your mother had once said pride was your "double-edged sword". how right she was.

"yeah, ni-ki's been kind to me," you say, recalling all the texts he's sent you, how accommodating of your injury he's been.

although i'm not entirely sure why.

from the time you've spent with him, you see bits and pieces of the easygoing jokester he's known as, but you also have been exposed to his moments of sincerity. you wonder why you haven't tried to befriend him before.

maybe it'll take a while for you to understand him more, but that just made the thought of seeing him at practice all the more exciting.

feeling your eyes start to droop, you drift off to sleep. you'll think more about all this later.

taglist: @luvistqrzzz @restlessmaknae

[atalana]

so i'm aware this advice isn't going to work for everyone, feel free to take it or leave it as you will, but since it works for me it's worth sharing - have you tried starting with a task that has extremely low barrier to entry and chaining the important stuff to that?

like, when i was in university, video games that had daily achievements were the only reason i got most of my assignments done

because when you're neurodivergent and struggle with starting tasks, there's a couple of things that might be causing a mental block

1) task too confusing - basically your brain doesn't know where to begin on this task and thus it's just paused everything until you can figure out the correct steps to take. when this is the issue, breaking it down into small chunks and writing down an order to do them in is a great solution

or it could be 2) task too scary. you know what this task involves but there's a lot of uncertain or unpleasant parts of it, so your brain has turned it into a hot stove reaction. getting someone else involved to help you is usually the best way around this one

but then there's 3) task engine won't start (otherwise known as autistic inertia). moving from rest to task mode takes energy, and if your energy is being taken up by being too tired or either of the problems above, you can keep trying to start that engine and it's just gonna keep sputtering at you

so the way around that one is to give yourself a task that removes all of the other barriers that might be draining your energy. if you're tired, do something that you can do while tired. if you're scared of the big task, start with a small task you're not scared of. if the task is confusing, start with something really easy to complete, ideally something you've done before

this is where video game dailies came in really handy for me. i would always do them when i got home, before i started any other school related tasks. and important distinction - this was not me deciding to rest and relax before starting the task, playing video games WAS the task. if you put your brain in time to relax mode, then it's easy to lose track of time and spend all day gaming and that just adds stress

but video game dailies gave me a natural stopping point. i log in, which is easy, requires very little energy, and isn't at all scary. i do whatever tasks in game i've decided to do for the day

and once those were done, i'd get that little voice in my head like "okay, what's next on the list?"

and once you're in "what's next on the list", it's a lot easier to move to "why, my homework is!" than it is to go from "i wanna sleep" to "time to do several hours of coursework!"

(and if you find even the tiniest of tasks like the video game dailies is too much for you, it's probably worth taking the time to rest because then you'll get back into productive mode quicker than if you'd tried all day to work, gotten nowhere, and still hadn't managed to get your rest)

this randomly blew up on twitter so i figured i’d post it here bc lord knows everyone on this app is neurodivergent

[darumadolls]

wait, i think i kinda wanna like reorganize my tags cuz i barely remember what were the small differences betwen em. and also, i should probably update you with my life cuz it's been a lot of years, anyway:

okay, i think i did it correctly so the post show only a couple of text instead of everything

- 2020 i entered university, i study public administration and am currently in my last year. it feels unreal

- cuz of uni i dont have time for anything omg i barely read, draw, play and all the other fun stuff i used to do. it's been so sad, but i really like my career so i enjoy all the studying but i still miss endless free time and my socials

- during the last year or so, ive been having weird pain in both my arms. ive been anywhere and everywhere, but still no clear diagnosis, currently am being tested for dysautonomia

- speaking of disabilities, i am working for the disability department of my university, ive been there for the last two years. at first i did very minor stuff, and now they assign me really complex task like making documents for the university director like omg. anyway, i love it there it makes me so happy

- on another note, ive been playing genshin impact, started in 2021 i think but as i said, i barely have time so im just halfway through sumeru im so slow. if u play in the american server my uid is 627938359

- am also playing pokemon go, u may add me there too 907722762596 i love postcards

i guess thatll be it, other stuff like my new interests i guess youll find out from my new reblogs and all that

i start uni in less than two weeks, so ill die again, but ill always be more active on instagram so you may follow me there im @/palo_aran i post mostly in spanish cuz its my first tongue but i do post a lot of other stuff in english too

i have a twitter too but im super dead in there but i wanna revive it, im @/AranCTM (i do wanna change the username, but if i do all probably make a post)