#and Zen finds it unimaginably hot

[itsdrawingmen]

Oh, kiss me like the final meal, Yeah, kiss me like we die tonight

[onlyplatonicirl]

"Please, tell us what happened." Lorel blinked her eyes, trying her best to keep them open, but the hospital lights were a little bit too bright for her to fully process. Around her bed stood a crowd of her close friends, those who had worked so hard to find her. Shandy sat at her side, within hugging distance. Lorel laughed a little bit, rubbing at her eyes and trying not to disrupt the IV. "I love you all..." "We love you too, Finchi," said Asteria, leaning down to give Lorel a quick hug with tears in her eyes, despite the fact Lorel had told her over and over again not to cry. She inhaled, and began telling her story. "They had taken me while I was asleep. When I woke up I was tied to a chair, and couldn't use any of my magic. At first, I wasn't worried. I knew I would find a way out eventually. There's been a lot worse in my past than a few ropes. I didn't know who they were but it didn't concern me that much. Of course I was scared, but I wasn't going to let them see that. That would just give them what they wanted. Closing her eyes, she kept talking. "It was dark and cold and lonely, and while that itself didn't really bother me, I was more concerned about what all of you were doing. At one point I figured out how to remove the cloth they had put in between my teeth and looped my arms in distance of my mouth, and I started chewing on the wires. Not the most glorious or cinematic way to escape, but I was out of options. I figured once I had my magic, I could just bust out of here and set the entire building ablaze and reduce it to nothing but a few ashes." "But I was too late." A pause. She shifted in the bed, coughing a little bit. All her external wounds had been healed, but there was still a lot of internal and soul damage that seemed to be beyond simple repair. "When I saw my captor, I started laughing hysterically, but apparently that pissed her off. She had a copy of Shandy and Zen haul me off into this weird looking room, but by that point I was starting to lose consciousness, everything became a blur. I didn't remember anything, maybe it was a gas. Do blockheads breathe? Anyways, they started doing something to my soul. I could move and they left me all alone. I don't remember what it looked like but there was metal everywhere, restraining me. And that's when it started hurting. "It burned unimaginably bad. It felt like water was filling my brain, blacking me out, all my senses were dulling. My chest felt like it was going to explode, and based on what you described, it does sound like a few blood vessels burst. Nothing felt real, my body didn't feel real. There were eyes all over my skin. I started knowing things about the world I didn't know before, I could feel myself coming apart under it all. It kept growing and growing and growing until finally I caught a glimpse of her - the other me. I could see things from her eyes. And I saw all of you below. And something happened. "It was hot. But cold. It was everything but at the same time I didn't even exist. By the time I was lucid, the entire building was rubble. It was burnt to the ground, everything twisted and destroyed beyond repair. I could barely stand up. Every flick of my fingers set something on fire or trapped something in a wall of dry ice. I had no control anymore. I was unstable and volatile. You guys were the only ones who could control it. "So I fled to the place I knew you would check next. I kept my hood drawn - I didn't know who was in on this scheme to keep me contained but I wasn't going to take any chances. During the nights I couldn't sleep. I was almost physically incapable of sleep at that point, so I'd let out all the pent up energy I had repressed that day in the more isolated parts of the woods. Trees would erupt into flames, and where the grass met my feet it would flourish and bloom and grow blossoms and then almost immediately afterwards wither and die. Even my physical form was fluctuating. These were powers I never had in the past, and I felt like a ticking time bomb. I was losing myself. When you all finally found me, I was at my very limits. Any longer and I might have died." The room was dead silent. Lorel thought it was funny apparently and laughed, before rolling over. "I don't like you all staring at me, makes me feel weird about this whole thing. I'm tired now, and I want to take a nap. I'm sad that I won't be able to use any magic for several months, but it's alright. I'll have to start small when I'm able to get up and walk around again. Until then, Shandy and Asteria will be my fluffy blankies." Yawning, she closed her eyes before yanking up the blanket as far as it could go, getting cozy in the covers. "Love you all... I really mean it to. You're my everything..." And with that, she fell asleep again. -------------------- HI I WROTE THIS IN LITERALLY 13 MINUTES SO IT PROBABLY SUX LOL BUT UH YEAH THIS WAS SUPER FUN AND I HOPE WE CAN DO AN RP LIKE THIS AGAIN SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVEN THOUGH I BARELY PARTICIPATED UNTIL THE VERY END IT WAS STILL VERY VERY FUN AND HOPEFULLY THE NEXT RP WILL BE EVEN BETTER THAN THE LAST. THIS IS A RLLY DUMB EPILOGUE BUT W H A T E V E R IM GOING TO BE NOW Also I wrote the scene where her soul starts getting amplified based on my own experiences with anesthisia. It got pretty scary once - it was like i was suffocating and my face was filling up my water and im like "HAHA now that ive EXPERIENCED it I can write something along those lines TEN TIMES BETTER" so yes hello im very smooth brained - Lorel

[ruffsficstuffplace]

And The AWRD Goes To... (Part 2)

Weiss stepped out of the crowds, the hubbub, and the hot and stuffy air inside the Great Hall, sighing and slumping her shoulders as she came down the stairs to the greenery, the spread out crowds, and the cool, fresh air.

She scanned the path leading up there, was disappointed but not surprised to find that Ruby and Akko had already disappeared from where she’d left them earlier. “Probably off at the firing range to check weapons, or looking for Shiny Chariot memorabilia on campus...” she thought as she walked down the path.

“So, there’s about an hour before we’re all supposed to report to the Great Hall for Headmaster Lionheart’s speech; you’re alone and have no idea where the hell Akko is; and Grandpa and Grandma explicitly stated that they don’t want to see you hiding out in either of their offices, unless you’re bleeding, having an episode, or have official, school-based business with them.”

She looked around at the crowds of students milling about, some enjoying the nice day, others also heading into the Great Hall with their luggage, the rest just disembarking from the later airship trips to Haven. “You could go try and make friends again! Hope things go better than earlier, possibly even make some headway with your future teammates if you happen to be having your initiation exam at the same time as them…

“… Or you could do the realistic thing, and hide out somewhere isolated, where no one will bother you or try to strike up a conversation with you.” Weiss paused to consider her two options for a few seconds, before she made a sharp turn off the main path, to the buildings on the fringes of Haven.

Unlike Akko and many of the other students, this wasn’t the first time Weiss had ever stepped foot on the campus. Though she had been under heavy surveillance and the watchful eye of either of her grandparents every single time, there was only so much you could do to keep a young, bored, and anti-social girl from exploring her surroundings, discovering shortcuts, memorizing routes and the lay of the land in her head, until she could get almost everywhere in campus with little difficulty.

Weiss smiled as she found herself in Haven’s zen garden, walking past the wooden lattice fences and arches covered in flowers, crawling vines, and bonsai trees; watching the small woodland creatures, birds, and butterflies going about their days; listening ho the gentle burble of water fountains and the irrigation streams, and of course, the regular, distinctive “doink!” sound of a deer chaser somewhere.

She wasn’t alone there, but she may as well have been with all the people she passed by intent on keeping to themselves, so Weiss just happily strolled through the familiar paths, humming quietly to herself as she made her way to her favourite spot:

The Jennifer Memorial Tree.

Legends abounded about the massive centerpiece of the garden: that its namesake was secretly buried there, after she fell during a massive siege of Grimm and her compatriots had gone through mythical hardships to recover her remains; that the spirits of all the fallen huntsmen and huntresses of Haven eventually returned there to watch over the next generation as they trained; that some sort of incredible, secret relic of unimaginable power was buried within its massive roots, waiting for the day a worthy wielder would appear and claim it.

To Weiss, however, it was just her grandfather Nick’s favourite spot to hang out after class and before going home, where he’d tell his grandchildren and/or interested students stories about his numerous adventures and misadventures all over Remnant, until an airship arrived to take him home. Weiss hummed to herself as she stepped into the protective dome around it, stopped as she realized that someone was already standing before the tree’s spiraling trunk.

It was another girl about her age, wearing a blue shirt with the hood pulled up over her head, a spear slung across her back, its head shaped like a unicorn’s horn.

Weiss awkwardly stopped some distance away from her, her features furrowed. “Oh, great, what do I do…?” she thought to herself. “Should I leave? Should I stay and try to ignore her? I can’t just tell a total stranger to up and leave public property…!”

The hooded girl turned around, Weiss saw her face, felt her mind screeching to a halt as she stared at her. The other girl’s gaze, sharp blue eyes locked with Weiss’ own. “Can I help you…?” she said as she stepped closer.

Weiss stood there, stunned, before started blubbering and struggling for words, until she finally managed to blurt out: “You’re Diana Cavendish!”

“I am her, yes,” Diana replied calmly.

There was silence for a few, awkward moments. Diana’s face remained neutral, but Weiss could feel the ever decreasing patience she had for her, see it in those pale blue eyes.

“I’ll just be taking my leave now...” Diana said as she began to make her way past Weiss.

“Wait!” Weiss blurted.

Diana stopped, looked at her with an expression that said: “This better be important.”

Weiss hesitated for a moment. “Thank you,” she said. “To your family. The Cavendishes. Without their work in medicine, my grandfather Nick would be dead by now.”

For a brief moment, Diana just stared at her in surprise, before her lips curled into a small smile. She was about to say something, before her eyes went wide. “… Wait, you’re Weiss Schnee, aren’t you?”

“Yes, yes I am!” Weiss said, beaming, before she frowned. “No longer associated with the Schnee Dust Company, by the way! My grandparents and mother cut ties with the company years ago, and I’ve absolutely no interest in reconnecting them!”

“I know, and I heard,” Diana said. “I’m assuming you’re here in Haven to follow in your grandfather’s footsteps?”

“… Among other reasons, but yes!” Weiss said, nodding. “The man I regret to say is my father dragged the Schnee name into the mud, and I intend to bring it out of it.” She paused. “Ah, if I may ask, what are you doing here in Haven? Sorry, my family has been living out in the mountains for all these years, and we aren’t really privy on most news of Mistral society...”

“Much the same as you, actually,” Diana said, smiling. “House Cavendish has fallen on its own tough times.”

“Sorry to hear that.”

“Thank you.” Diana said. “You know, now that I think about it, maybe our two legacies can help each other out once more—what would the Cavendish hospitals and laboratories been without Schnee dust powering them, after all…?”

Weiss blinked. “You mean… you want us to be partners? Like in a team…? Together?”

“If fate decides to bind our families together in such a way, yes.” Diana said. “Otherwise, I wouldn’t mind cooperating with yours, whoever they might be.”

Weiss just stared blankly at her. “Oh. That’s… very generous of you, thank you!”

“You’re welcome.” Diana said. “Now if you’ll please excuse me, I had other things I intended to do before the Headmaster’s speech...”

“O-Oh, go on ahead, please don’t let me keep you!” Weiss said as she quickly stepped aside, awkwardly swept her arm towards one of the exits.

Diana smiled at her one more time as she left, before her face was neutral once more, her gaze locked forward as she made her way out of the zen garden.

Weiss watched her go for a few moments, before skipping to the base of the Jennifer Memorial Tree and sitting down at the particular patch of dirt Nick always favoured. “Wait till Grandpa hears about this…!” she thought as she looked up at the vibrant leaves looming above her, a smile on her face, her eyes shining.

Then, little by little, the smile disappeared, the glow in her eyes faded, till she was looking up at the canopy with a look of mute, silent dread.

The Great Hall was abuzz with activity, students flooding almost every bit of space on the floor, some of them even hanging off or sitting on the rafters up in the ceiling. Weiss stood somewhere in the middle of the crowds with Akko by her side, neither Ruby nor Diana in sight. “Ruby said she wanted to be with sister for this,” Akko replied when Weiss asked.

On the stage in the center, Headmaster Lionheart prepared to step up to the microphone, some the professors standing behind him—and to Weiss’ dismay, both of her grandparents were absent, no doubt busy with the preparations for the initiation tests tomorrow.

Lionheart took a deep breath, combed back his iconic gray mane with one hand, before he smiled and stepped up to the microphone. “Students? Students, lend me your ears for a moment, please!” When the casual chatter all around the Great Hall quieted down somewhat, Lionheart just sighed to himself, smiled, and continued. “Thank you. Now, good evening, everyone, and welcome to Haven Academy!

“Many are the walks of life you all came from. Some of you are here from the highest echelons of the city, children of celebrities, nobles, and the most affluent individuals in all of the kingdom. Some of you are from the lower levels, children of the hard workers that make our kingdom great, our farmers, our masons, our hardworking merchants hawking their trades day after day. Others still are from the settlements and the villages all over the hills of Mistral, across the seas from the other kingdoms as far away as Vacuo, or from origins they’d rather not be brought up.

“Many more are the reasons you enrolled here. Some of you are like the original huntsmen and huntresses, here to protect those that cannot protect themselves, slay the Grimm, and keep the peace in our kingdoms. Some of you see it as a means to status and glory, something to brag about to future employers, put in your resumes, or make for interesting conversation at parties. Some of you see it as just another way to earn a living, and start a new life for yourself as you enter adulthood.

“And right now, I can see your pasts and your motivations divide you, so many walls running down along as many lines as you can imagine.

“I will not lie: four years in this academy will not completely break down those barriers, and when you graduate, you may find many more than you ever thought possible wherever you go.

“But it is my and the staff’s sincerest hope that during your time here, you learn that in times of crises, in times of need, in times when all hope seems lost and the end seems to have come for all of us, these divides will cease to matter, that it will not matter if the person you are saving is member of the Council or a simple farmer, if they are also from Mistral or wherever else in Remnant, that the huntsmen and huntresses you are fighting with are human or Faunus, rich or poor, famous or unknown:

“For in the end, we are all the people of Remnant, all wanting to survive, to thrive, to live and be happy.” Lionheart smiled. “I hope to see you all here again in four years time, handing you and your future teams your licenses. Thank you, and good afternoon, students.”

The Great Hall erupted in applause, some of it honest and heartfelt, others distinctly sarcastic, the faces on the students ranging from inspired and proud, to disgusted and cynical.

“Can you believe they’re still spouting that crap year after year…?” Weiss heard someone whisper nearby.

“Yeah—we’re all equals alright, but some of us are more equal than others...”

Lionheart bowed and took his leave, one of the professors stepped up to the mic, a shy and timid looking woman with long blue hair and very plain and simple clothes. “All of you please report back here soon as soon as the sun goes down, 6PM sharp—we don’t want to see or hear about any of you getting up to any sort of trouble after dark, and Professor Schnee asked me to tell you all, and I quote, ‘Don’t even try the “I was just looking for the bathroom” excuse, or any others tall tales! I really have heard them all, kiddos.’

“Try not to stay up too late and get plenty of rest, everyone,” she said. “You’ll want to be well-rested before we send you out into the Celestial Hills for initiation tomorrow. That is all for the announcements, you are all dismissed.”

The crowds started breaking up, some staking their spots as early as now, other still heading out before curfew was enacted.

“You want to go find some of that Shiny Chariot stuff Uncle Nick was talking about?” Akko said, bouncing on her heels and raring to go.

“I’m surprised you didn’t do that while we were separated earlier,” Weiss said.

“I promised I’d only do it with my best friend, right?” Akko said, beaming. “Though, Ruby and I ran into some Shiny Chariot stuff while we were heading to the training grounds to show off our weapons—totally coincidental, along the way stuff, I swear!”

Weiss chuckled, and smiled back. “I believe you. Now come on, let’s go! Time’s a wasting!”

“Yay!” Akko cried, before she all but dragged Weiss out and through the crowds at top speed, like a missile with an unlucky hanger-on.

Hours later, when the whole of Haven was cast in a warm orange light and all the students were staking their claims out in the Great Hall or making the most of their remaining free time, Weiss and Akko trudged back through the entrance, the former exhausted from trying to keep up with her friend, the latter scowling and stewing in disappointment.

“I can’t believe they have so little of Shiny Chariot here!” Akko complained. “She’s one of the best, most amazing huntresses to ever graduate here from Haven, why don’t they even have a statue of her?!”

Still out of breath, and legs aching, Weiss only nodded and patted her friend on the shoulder.

“We should start a petition, you know, get your grandparents to sponsor it, and every single student and staff member here to sign it!” Akko cried. “We’re going to personally shove it right onto Lionheart’s desk, and then we’re going to have a giant statue of Shiny Chariot put up on campus! Made of stone, so it lasts for centuries! And right in the center of the campus, so everyone will see it, wherever it is they’re going!”

“I sincerely wish you the best of luck with such an outlandish endeavour,” a familiar voice said. Weiss and Akko turned to the side, found Diana in a night gown, a rolled-up sleeping bag under her arm. “Merely finding people who even remember Shiny Chariot’s name will prove to be a challenge, let alone ones who still have as much passion for her as you do.”

“It won’t be that difficult!” Akko snapped, scowling.  “So what if she’s taken a little break from hunting? She helped a lot of people and inspired so many more! She’s practically a legend, people don’t forget legends that easily!”

Diana’s expression remained neutral. “A piece of unsolicited advice: that seemingly boundless energy of yours might be better spent making a name for yourself, than trying to bring back someone who’s long stepped out of the spotlight—for all you know, this ‘break’ might be an unannounced, permanent retirement...” she muttered as she walked off.

Akko fumed, Weiss sighed and put a hand on her shoulder. “Just let her go, Akko, and let’s look for a place to sleep tonight...” Weiss said.

“Hmph. I hope we aren’t in the same batch as her tomorrow...” Akko grumbled as she left with Weiss.

After a few minutes of searching, it was clear they should have called off the hunt for Shiny Chariot memorabilia much earlier: all the good spots in the Great Hall were long taken, old or newly formed cliques and factions had already staked vast swaths of territory for themselves and were quite selective about who they let in, and free spots were looking far and few in-between.

“Excuse me!” they heard a girl call out. Weiss and Akko looked, found an orange-haired girl with massive, clunky glasses waving at them, an empty sleeping bag next to her, and free space enough for two wedged side-by-side nearby. The two of them smiled wasted no time rushing over to her before someone else claimed the offer.

“Yay!” Akko cried as she triumphantly rolled out her sleeping bag, round birds with a star on its belly printed all over it. “Thanks! I thought we were going to have to try and sleep standing up with our backs against each other again!”

The girl with glasses blinked. “Again…?”

“It’s a long story...” Weiss muttered as she unrolled hers, a surplus Mistral military bedroll. “Anyway, I’m Weiss, and this is my friend, Akko. You would be?”

“Lotte,” Lotte replied, smiling.

“Well, thank you, Lotte,” Weiss said as she sat down. “If there’s anything we can do to repay you, just say the word.”

Lotte waved them off. “Oh, don’t even mention it!”

“Not so fast, Lotte: this could be a great opportunity for new test subjects...” a fourth, unnerving voice said.

Weiss turned to the source, found herself scowling. Akko cried and scrambled backwards, nearly crashing into the students behind her. “You!” they both cried.

Lotte frowned as she looked at Akko and Weiss, and at the girl returning to her sleeping bag. “Sucy, you know these two?”

“She poisoned me earlier!” Akko snapped. “I puked my guts out thanks to whatever it was she gave me! Twice!”

“Sucy!” Lotte snapped, glaring at her friend.

Sucy shrugged. “She came out of nowhere and started going off about something a mile a minute, what else was I supposed to do?”

“She was trying to introduce herself and make a friend!” Weiss snapped, Akko nodding beside her.

Sucy’s one visible eye blinked. “Oh. Well, at least, I got some great observations in earlier...”

Lotte sighed. “I apologize for Sucy, she’s, well...” she trailed off, struggled to think of a word, before giving up.

Weiss stood up, looked around, and found the spaces inside the warm, sheltered Great Hall already fast running out; staff were already forcing the cliques to give up space, but she had a feeling they were going to be breaking out tents pretty soon…

She sat back down, and looked Sucy dead in her eye. “No funny stuff in the middle of the night, okay? Even without my weapon, I’m dangerous enough with just my semblance.” Weiss said.

Sucy half-heartedly put her hand on her chest. “Huntress’ honour.”

Weiss looked at her warily, before Akko and her switched places, Weiss now closer to Sucy than her.

It wasn’t exactly how either of them wanted to spend their first night in Haven, but Weiss supposed it was a good start to when they’d inevitably be sleeping in worse accommodations...

[mirroredtranslations]

Karen Ogre - Chapter 8

Wazamonogatari – Nisioisin p. 161-167

[Previous Chapter]

Come to think of it, I ought to have worked out a plan for any bear encounters that might have happened while I was asleep—I mean, there were none, but I wouldn't have been shocked if there had been.

Not just bears.

I hadn't caught sight of any yet, but in such a densely forested area as this, there must be snakes, too; I would be utterly lost if I encountered a venomous snake. There's no hope for a cell phone signal this deep in the mountains—no way to call for a rescue.

Exhaustion had made me relax my guard. I've got to stay focused.

I washed my face and cleaned my body in a nearby stream (learning how blessed I was to have hot water), and looked out upon my second day, refreshed.

I think I cooked the rice better than I did yesterday.

Can get used to anything, I guess.

Though it wasn't clear whether I'd gotten used to the preparation technique, or just the taste.

So I'd thought the hike would have to be easier than yesterday's... but that was not to be.

That is to say, I'd forgotten something.

It had completely slipped my mind.

Three mountains comprise the Three Ouga Mountains—the second of those mountains, Senshin Peak, had a vastly different landscape compared to Oniai Mountain.

I had a preconceived notion that the name “Senshin Peak” meant that the trees on the mountain were mostly made up of conifers, but upon closer examination (I had done some preliminary investigation, but it had simply slipped my mind), I learned that the “shin” in “Senshin Peak” did not refer to the needle-like leaves of conifer trees.(1)

It'd sure be great if it did.

The “shin” in “Senshin Peak” referred instead to “rocks as sharp as needles”. In other words, Senshin Peak was what they call a “rocky mountain”.(2)

It was certainly no coniferous forest—there were hardly any trees growing at all.

As such, today's leg of the journey would seem to be more like rock climbing than mountaineering.

To traverse the rocks, I used three-point support(3) to crawl over their surface, which required me to have free use of both hands. As such, I unfortunately had to leave the Japanese sword I'd received from Blond Bun-san, which I was using as a pole, at the mountain's edge.

I'd wanted to tie it to my rucksack and take it with me, but it's a naked Japanese sword—if I fell over, it could very well cause a terrible tragedy... I've got to remember to retrieve it on the return trip.

There'll be bears on the return trip too, after all.

So, after burying the Japanese sword in a shallow hole I dug under a tree, I set out upon Senshin Peak. In simple terms of physical effort, this one looked to be harder than yesterday's.

Could say that the level of difficulty went up on account of my progression to the next stage.

You need to use your whole body for rock climbing, and honestly, I hadn't brought enough rope—once again exposing my lack of preparation.

However, unlike ordinary mountaineering, with which I had basically no experience, I had some experience with bouldering(4) and similar attractions as part of my training; as a result, I could keep a small degree of mental composure.

A little bit—but even so.

What I know is weapons and strength.

Tsubasa-san's line, “I don't know everything, just what I know,” is modest and humble, but at the same time a brazen boast; I haven't seen her in a very long time now, but she'd probably be able to succeed magnificently and without incident at this Zen dialogue-like problem of “meeting yourself”.

What I need right now.

Is to know myself.

To know Karen Araragi—hmm.

I still don't get it.

I'm just not seeing it.

By acting alone, with just my own strength to go on, in the wilderness, I'll get an opportunity to reexamine myself... If that was Master's intention in encouraging me to bathe in a waterfall, well, having come this far, I could understand that. But it's not like I was born in a forest, and don't I want to live on a mountain either.

I don't think that clinging tightly onto these rocks represents my true self. My true nature is a girl who attends high school and takes classes, or maybe, a girl who attends a dojo and throws punches.

That's me.

I'm much closer to my true self when I'm messing around with my big brother or playing with Tsukihi-chan than when I'm fighting bears.

If I'm supposed to find myself...

I feel like I could do that at my house. No need to bathe in a waterfall deep in the mountains.

Well, no doubt I'm thinking these thoughts because I'm having a tough time rock climbing.

When you're weakened, your thoughts weaken too; I should come up with a reason to take a rest.

Thinking bad thoughts is no better than sleeping.

So, I should stop grumbling, shut up, and graciously take a rest.

I'll understand when I bathe in the waterfall.

I'll think of this as one of Master's trials for full mastery. I might not know myself, but I do know what kind of person Master is.

She doesn't lie, and she doesn't speak carelessly.

And she isn't someone who will tell you to do something you can't do—because Master instructed me to seclude myself in the mountains, this harsh traversing is something I ought to be able to do.

She also told me to turn back if I couldn't do it... but setting that aside, I continued single-mindedly climbing Senshin Peak, clinging onto the bare rock.

Although I had more experience with this than yesterday's leg of the journey, I had no choice but to be careful, thinking of how unlikely I was to recover from making a mistake.

Falling onto sharp rocks would result in far worse injury than falling onto soft dirt. Concentrate, concentrate. I shouldn't let my mind wander.

On this mountainside, it's all I can do to stay alive.

Unbothered by any detours I had to take, I maintained the safest route I could, and aimed for the summit.

Considering how, if I were to get hurt, Master would also be implicated since she's the one who gave me instructions, it's really not just my own problem.

And for the sakes of the people who believed in me, I have to keep on living.

But even though I had every intention of being as careful as possible, there's a limit on what a person can do—that is to say, I could only get so much knowledge from imaginary training.

That, too.

Is a case of “I don't know everything, just what I know.”

The bouldering you do indoors is not the same as rock climbing done outdoors. Of course it isn't. But I had viewed them in the same light.

Careless as careless can be.

Um, what I mean to say is, this is outdoors, so of course there isn't any air conditioning, and there isn't a roof to block the sun.

No roof to provide shade.

As time passed, more and more brilliant light from the sun poured down from directly above me.

I'm not worried about sunburn, of course.

I have enough feminine sense to put on sunblock when going outdoors.

My body was slimy all over from the sunblock I borrowed from Tsukihi-chan.

That's not it—the issue was the bare rocks.

It was the rocks.

“So hot!”

Maybe the rocks had changed under the scorching light of the sun; the crevice I'd reached for felt as hot as a frying pan.

Hot enough to fry an egg.

Even a former Fire Sister couldn't withstand it.

Not only did I reflexively pull my fingers away, but my whole body recoiled as well. There was nothing I could do.

Trying to regain my balance made me lose my balance even more. Far from three-point support—this was zero-point. A perfect score of zero points.

This is bad. I'll fall.

Onto a sharp mountainside, no less.

It's as if I'm falling into the Needle Mountain in Hell.(5)

Senshin Peak.

It would be great if I could get away with just bone fractures. But I'm going to get skewered here.

It was absolutely not the time to be imagining that, but my body froze up; I don't have trypanophobia,(6) but for some reason, I got stuck in the phrase “stabbed by needles”.

Both body and mind.

Got stuck.

O-oh.

Like a revolving lantern was flying around inside my head.

What is this feeling?

Is this how it feels to die?

No, no, it's too soon to feel like I've reached enlightenment—I'm not even halfway toward my goal of bathing in the waterfall, and moreover, I won't necessarily die from being skewered by a rock.

It could be worse than bone fractures, but not bad enough to kill me.

In the worst case, I'll be pierced somewhere in my torso; unable to move, but also unable to die quickly, I'll suffer unimaginably, my body will get roasted from the inside out from the heat of the sun-scorched rocks, and then I'll finally die... Ugh, my imagination is way too vivid!

Then.

“'Twill be dislocated!”

Immediately after hearing that voice, a sharp pain shot through my shoulder. With a crack, all of my body weight fell on my extended right arm.

I mean, it might not have been my shoulder that held up my whole body, but rather my wrist; or perhaps it was a tiny palm, like an autumn leaf, that firmly grabbed my wrist.

A tiny palm.

The owner of the palm that caught me just after I fell was a little blond girl with a bob cut, who appeared to have been rock climbing while hidden in my shadow.

[Next Chapter]

Footnotes: (1) “Senshin” (千針) here means “thousand needles”. I've elected to use partial transliterations instead of literal translation of the mountain names, for brevity's sake. (2) A mountain where the bare rock is exposed. (3) Three-point support is a climbing strategy in which three of your four limbs are always holding onto something to prevent falling. (4) Bouldering is a form of rock climbing where you scale—wait for it—boulders. Artificial climbing walls that simulate bouldering are apparently common in climbing gyms. (5) A place in Buddhist hell; a mountain covered in needles. (6) Trypanophobia is the fear of needles.

[rilenerocks]

One of the things I remember Michael saying to me on many occasions was that he thought I was the most singularly unchanged person that he ever knew. I was forever trying to decide if I should take that as a compliment or not. Since I was only 20 when we met, I figured that in the 46 years we knew each other he probably had a fair view of my behavior. In the end, I agreed with him and viewed “unchanged” not in a pejorative manner, but in a positive one. I’m consistent. My belief system has been in place for a very long time. Of course, I’ve grown, developed, evolved. But my core, my fundamental self is pretty much the same as it was when I was teenager. For people who know me well, that means I’m predictable. And complicated.

My brain speeds along at a rapid clip. I’m always processing. As yet, my motherboard hasn’t failed me. Which means nothing is ever just simple for me. I remember when I saw the movie, The Last Samurai. At a moment when the Tom Cruise character was getting his rear end kicked over and over during sparring practice, a friendly warrior came up to him, tapped him on the forehead and said, “too many mind.” I can relate. I’ve been working on slowing down and adopting practices that to help me

when my start spinning too fast.

I learned how to do revitalizing meditations to help me stay calm and cerebral when Michael was sick and needed my help. I have the Calm app on my phone and I use it regularly. I’m pretty zen when I swim. Still, a lot of my time is spent thinking, analyzing and considering, often about multiple topics simultaneously. It’s just how I roll. I think all this began when I was really young because I remember these same feelings and thoughts from my childhood.

    And so it was on my long-desired trip to Glacier National Park, which in its essence was everything I dreamed of and more. I’ve been to a good number of national parks, Acadia just last month. Certain ones had more impact than others. I’ll never forget Bryce Canyon, Zion and Arches. I got to experience those with Michael which enhanced their majesty and spiritual power for me. Being on my own in Glacier, it was all about me, with my forever bond with Michael, tucked into my most interior self, like an extra vital organ. But I saw and felt Glacier through the lens I bring to everything, the one when I am simultaneously in my moment while my mind is zipping along, connecting that moment to how I perceive the world.

    I went to Glacier by train which is a great way to travel and really see parts of the country that are off the main road and certainly hidden when flying. I spent almost all my waking hours staring out the window. I don’t want to miss anything. I’ve never tired of seeing cattle and horses, not since I was a little kid traveling up and back between Iowa and Chicago. On an overnight rail trip, there is so much more as you travel from state to state. I saw buffaloes and donkeys.

    Numerous white tailed deer grazing and springing through the fields right next to the domestic animals. I saw a swift fox. I saw American white pelicans, great blue herons, American kestrels, a ring necked pheasant and lots of red winged blackbirds, mallard ducks and rabbits.

    I saw fields planted with beans and wheat and other crops I can’t identify by sight.

    The vistas are endless and impressive.

    But I also saw small towns that looked economically ravished. Aging buildings and others that have already fallen. There’d be this gorgeous green landscape and suddenly piles of junked cars and garbage would appear.

    The shabbiness was a stark contrast to the surrounding lush earth. And then came big sky. Endless miles of beautiful land, absolutely empty. In my mind I was envisioning herds of buffalo and tipis and the native people who made their lives here for countless years before being decimated by the relentless move west by settlers and power brokers. I’m sure that much of the land I saw was owned by big ranching concerns. But it felt so wrong. All the beauty tarnished for me. I can appreciate it but not without thinking of the cost to the people who lived here. Then the reservation appears.

The Blackfeet  reservation is actually a conglomeration of tribes whose general name is Niitsitapi which means “the real people.” I saw buildings with the words “no meth” painter boldly across the walls. The very idea of reservations appalls me. Would you like to live with your people in a designated area? Me neither.

    The Blackfeet tribe has rights to parts of Glacier National Park which include their most spiritual locations such as Two Medicine. Ceremonies are still performed there such as sun dances, while sweat lodges are built for the transitions and rituals of native life. I took a boat ride on Two Medicine Lake and went through their valley. You can feel a powerful spiritual presence there. I opened myself up to let it blend in with me and Michael and my own belief system. Certainly not the same as theirs but nonetheless connected if by nothing other than the surrounding natural majesty. The natives call some of the mountains the backbone of the earth. It’s not hard to understand why.

    I stayed in East Glacier Lodge which is a beautiful old building with no televisions and sketchy internet. It lends itself well to getting in touch with what this place is supposed to mean to human beings. Their staff all seem to share a common attitude of preserving the nature of the park and its mystical energy. There are tributes to the natives throughout the lodge and the park although for me, it wasn’t enough. Keeping a piece of your ancestral land rings hollow to me. I saw a tall Native American man tending flowers at another lodge. He resembled Will Sampson who played the chief in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. He seemed to enjoy what he was doing and had positive interactions with a few people working with him. Maybe his life is happy. Maybe I’m the one with the problem.

    Let me stop and say that I felt everything I hoped to feel at Glacier. As I stood before mountains that are estimated to be between 1600 and 800 million years old, I felt my smallness and the tiny place that I know I occupy, even when things feel huge. I felt the fabric of connection that still binds me to Michael and my love for the earth and its marvels. But then the guide told us that the remaining 20-odd glaciers are expected to be gone by 2030. Unimaginable. Was this destined to happen over a long period of time or isn’t it part of the upheaval we’re seeing all over the world. Climate change. I’ve heard all the arguments from people who say it’s been hot before, we’ve had hurricanes before, we’ve had fires before. Blah-blah-blah. Our planet is threatened. I have no doubt. Blazing hot temperatures in Alaska. Water supplies in India drying up. Europe sweltering. The hottest June on record. Ever. I’m not capable of simply enjoying my good fortune without thinking about all these frightening things. I’ll be dead before the worst stuff happens. But what about all the children and grandchildren? I have hope that brilliant people will find ways to turn some of this around. That we’ll stop burning fossil fuels. That we’ll get rid of plastic in the oceans. That a place like Glacier will still have snowy peaks in the summer. But to ignore it for my own mental well-being? No can do. I had the privilege of seeing so much wildlife in the park. I saw a black bear, a moose, long horned sheep, elk and mountain goats. They’re just doing their thing. But a lot can threaten the ecosystem that supports them and I worry.

    Through the train window I saw the amount of flooding that occurred when the Mississippi overflowed its banks, not to mention the smaller rivers nearby. The wooded area and retaining ponds along the tracks are filled with mile after mile of algae bloom. That can’t be a good thing. As I watched animals drinking from this green pea soup I wondered about the chemical runoff from farms into the water table. Not to mention what can happen to people’s drinking water. Still thinking of Flint over here.

    So yes, I am thrilled that I got to see this incredible wonder for what is likely the only time in my life. I think that inner city kids from everywhere should be brought on field trips to experience this magnificent place or others like it so they can make an early commitment to trying to rescue the earth and each other. I can’t go back and undo the genocide that happened long before I arrived. But I think it should be remembered and never ignored. Another thing Michael said to me frequently was this: “ Great. So as long as you know that somewhere someone might be having a problem or that there are systemic issues, you’re going to be bummed out. Living with you will sure be fun.” Well, we did have fun. But there’s more to life than that.

Overdrive One of the things I remember Michael saying to me on many occasions was that he thought I was the most singularly unchanged person that he ever knew.

[hotcoffeeandbreakfast]

My limited library of words seems dismally insufficient when I think about describing the most love-filled week of my life, but the details below are my best attempt at painting the picture for you, and for me. And most importantly, him.

Two weeks ago, at this very time (5:46am) my husband and I were fast asleep yet somehow alive and well in a daydream state. In just a few short hours, I would wake up and leave Neil sleeping so I could chop off roughly 6-7 inches of hair, pack up all the small details of my jaw-dropping wedding wardrobe, and hug my dearest friends goodbye as Mrs. Patel.

I can’t believe it’s been two weeks! Have I been floating this entire time? Probably so.

When Neil and I first got engaged, we talked about eloping. We talked about planning a “half and half” ceremony, though we weren’t sure what that was supposed to look like or mean. We talked forever about where we would host whatever we were hosting. I knew he wasn’t down for the traditional five days, and he knew I wasn’t interested in the big white dress and long, dramatic walk down the aisle. Our options were endless but we both wanted just one thing out of the whole event: to spend forever with each other. With that in mind, we knew the details would eventually sort themselves out. Y’all, everything I thought would be clever and romantic enough to describe this momentous, magical day (week) seems to pale the lustrous paint due to limitation of words.

My interest — now obvious fascination — with the East and all of its ancient traditions is completely pouring out and over the rim of my cup. Of course, it started years ago with my yoga practice and being ever curious about proper thought during meditation, but now it is this whole other thing, a wave of deep devotion to exploring and satisfying this inquiring mind. When I met Neil, I never knew what would blossom in my brain as far as being drawn to culture and practice. During the year between our engagement and wedding, I absorbed as much as I could about the different ceremonies we’d chosen; the ones most important in Gujarat. I read and researched for months what I could online about “multicultural” weddings, searching endlessly for descriptions about what each small ceremony or ritual would entail, looking for answers for what is normally expected of the bride, and lastly, TRYING TO LEARN GUJARATI. Nothing I could Google or Bing or Yahoo or memorize would ever prepare me emotionally and mentally for being the semi-center of these gorgeous events. Everything, and I mean every tiny minutia is met with respect and holds meaning in the Hindu faith and Gujarati culture.

Our first event of the week — aside from Wednesday’s Monsoon themed nail party (that’s totally a joke, however bad the rain really was) — was Thursday morning’s pooja (puja) to bless the Patel house. All immediate family members and a few close friends showed up, and I was simply excited to be there to watch…I had no idea I would end up participating and leave feeling like I too had received all kinds of blessings. The priest and priestess arrived and began setting up the altar. My partner in crime, Ashley Treib, and I watched in white girl amazement as small details of a religion completely new to us unfolded. I took note of the items used during the pooja: fresh food and fruit, various types of rice, petals plucked from fresh flowers, water, and fire. As I was taking this mental inventory, Daksha, my mother-in-law, called me over and asked if I’d like to participate. I blushed and shook my head yes. “Krishna will have to sit between you and Neil since you aren’t married yet,” she said with a smirk, which pinked my cheeks even deeper.

We are getting married!!!  was my only thought as a smile spread across my whole body.

The priest started the ceremony and read and chanted and Neil, Krishna, and I became a unit: Krishna holding on to Neil’s right arm, me holding on to Krishna’s. OMG I AM CRYING AS I WRITE THIS! Daksha was sitting next to me, and every now and then, she would hold on to me, making our line even longer. I was feeling the beat of this ceremony, even though there really wasn’t a specific tempo. At any given time, I could hear the priest, overlapped by the interpretation from the priestess — a huge courtesy for me — mixed with the gentle clanking of pans in the kitchen and soft, Guju chatter. This ceremony was nothing new for most of the family so they were either eating or napping, aside from the handful that sat around the living room in a half circle. I noticed this briefly and it made me smile, but only on the inside; my nerves held my face. I was completely glued-in the entire two hours of rituals, fascinated by what I’d never seen before. I could feel Ashley sitting right behind me, drinking it all up too. I’d never seen ritual performed on a level like this, and I’ve experienced some religion in my days.

I can’t compare what I observed in those two hours to anything else. There was demonstration and explanation and time for honoring all; there was pranayama. It felt old and new, the way an worn wooden pew bench does when I come across one and take a seat. I shifted from side to side, like I did in church when I was young; full of questions and observation, but required to remain quiet and search for the answers in my head.

We read aloud and took small bites and prayed by offering bits of rice and petals; to my surprise I even recognized some Sanskrit words here and there. The pooja concluded and I felt another remarkable wave of peace wash over me. As a person who once loved religion for ritual and reverence, this kind of honoring of tradition stirred me up inside.

A delicious evening of live dosa making followed a few hours later, where we drifted in to a hot August night and woke up to a cool, wedding weekend.

      My adrenaline the week of the wedding was insane, I felt like I was on fire;  Thursday’s pooja fanned my flame, maybe blazed it. I wasn’t hungry, I was mostly decaffeinated, and I couldn’t really tell if I was sleeping or just floating through the nights between the hours of 11 p.m. and 6 a.m. But I was awake, so woke I couldn’t even buzz myself to sleep with wine. Friday morning, I woke up before the world and laid around until I couldn’t any longer. I pushed my floating body in the shower at 8am, waking Ashley and Alex with uncoordinated noise, and chatted up the shower-head about the hours that would follow. Picking up friends and family from the airport, steaming all my clothes for various events, receiving the first part of my mehndi….I was on the “bridal climb” and trying my best not to totally. freak. out!

  In preparation for a week of meeting family, prepping last minute things to pack in my teeny carry-on (an activity I eventually did so many times at 2am on Monday, I started timing myself) and being consumed with all kinds of emotions, I got in about five-ish hours of yoga. Teaching some, moving around at home, taking class; I made it my mission to be able to locate my zen on the spot if I needed to. I stuck to my Veg30 diet to keep my mind and body clean and I made myself as busy as possible. Again…as much preparation as my little Capricorn heart, body, and soul could muster was indeed not enough to properly assemble my brain for becoming Mrs. Patel. My thought for most of the weekend, aside from reminding myself not to lock out my knees, was, “in through the nose, out through the nose.” I literally had to remind myself to breathe. I am unimaginably empathetic, so I sponged up everyone else’s emotions too; absorbing that much love can make you feel a kind of high I wasn’t aware existed. Breathe, breathe, breathe.

My amazing henna artist/ family friend/ hair-growing-goddess, Felicia, arrived around noon on Friday to get a jump on the first part of my mehndi, so I could at very least walk around and greet everyone that had traveled for us from everywhere. It was then, upon Felicia’s arrival, that I — I’ll admit, forcefully — entered my official state of what everyone has since referred to as, “tempered.” I’m not kidding when I say that every person that saw me during the wedding for more than 4 minutes made it a point to tell me how relaxed I seemed…to which I endlessly laughed, internally. She started with my feet and worked her way up to my right forearm, not missing a beat even when I’d shift around or twitch. In through the nose, out through the nose. She finished up after about three hours and headed out to get herself ready for a second night of fun. My feet were mostly dry, but my arm still needed a solid twenty before I could move around and start primping too; all my other limbs would be finished at the ceremony so everyone could check out the process in real life. If I could hold them up. My nerves were…all present, lets just say.

    I felt anything but normal when I saw him. All weekend long he was the most regal thing I’ve ever laid eyes on; a glowing, gold aura beamed off of him constantly.

  I’d been hugging and meeting family when he walked in and I vaguely remember confetti falling around us as we met/ ran / floated somewhere in the middle (? maybe??) of the room, before I randomly sat down to be hand fed and henna-ed. I swear I’m not making this up, it happened! REALLY!!! 

  All night long, I sat lounging on this beautiful, golden chaise and watched my family meet Neil’s family. All of our friends from all over started finding each other and introducing themselves…and I got to see it. I looked up once and saw all of the aunties doing henna on my friends and on each other. I watched everyone laugh together and turn up!! and eventually hit the dance floor together. It was so beautiful and I was nearly in shock from it all, bright light beaming from my eyeballs, no doubt. At one point, my sweet little sister comes up to me, pops a spring roll in to my mouth and whispers in my ear, “are you on drugs or something? You look…euphoric. Your eyes are the size of the moon.” She was 100% right. I was totally, naturally in euphoria, which was currently oozing from every inch of the interior of the room.Well, wasn’t it?  To be completely honest, there was a split second where I was presented with two choices: freak out and be nervous the whole night or just relax and embrace and observe, so that’s what I did. I spent the entire night panning the room, glued to my chair from the wildness of the thought that this was all for us.

Did I, at one point, end up in the bathroom alone and holler out? Yes, of course I did. Only to get out some wild, happy, loud energy. I still feel the joyful, overwhelming happy vibes of that night; I’m living off the entire weekend, but I had never, until that night, ever felt so much magic in one place.

And then I heard the words “party bus,” from three moustached, unbuttoned, feisty firemen (or maybe some cousins?), and I knew the night was about to take an interesting turn. Neil, along with all the fire guys from NOLA, fam from Philly, Boston, Dallas, and who knows where else, piled on to a bus that would take them far in to the morning of our wedding. I slipped out of my mehndi dress and in to a blue silk dress from my little Blayre, and entertained my friends with a gin-induced Lil Wayne rap battle…with myself. I Ubered Ashley, Michael, and me (did that work like I wanted it to?) back to the hotel by midnight and forced myself to sleep, an attempt to be as fresh as possible for the best day of my life. I think my mind finally turned off around 2am, but who can really say?

I “woke up” at 7am on the nose, to a text from my sister-in-law saying she broke her foot on said party bus.

And to the forecast of rain.

And to a very hungry belly that was lightly lined with alcohol and crackers.

But that didn’t keep me in bed and certainly didn’t stop the ear-to-ear smile from practically ripping my face open, eyes and all, the morning of my wedding. I flung the curtains open (more like slowly unzipped them) and apologized for waking the room and informed them about Krishna and said that it was time to get it in gear and where the hell is the coffee??!!! I was awake and so ready to become Mrs. Patel.

Neil’s vidhi was first up on this gorgeous Saturday, perpetual inner sunshine totally dousing the dreariness of the cool August day. This ceremony is typically done at both homes of  the bride and groom, separately, where they are blessed by the priest, their parents, all of their uncles and aunts, and treated to haldi by female cousins, which are lovingly referred to as sisters. The haldi is a handmade paste that is rubbed on the face to make the skin glow. (It smelled amazing from where I ended up sitting) I couldn’t wait to watch this!  How can they possibly make Neil’s face glow any more than it already does?! It is mildly infuriating at times how beautiful my husband is, but his smile truly looks like a glowing, endless sunset, so I tolerate the his annoying wonderful charm and dashing, sassy good looks. (life is hard)

Many more family members and friends had arrived after the mehndi, so I was nervous, yet excited, to meet more people. The squad was impressively dressed and at the hall before most, so I had time to cool my head and find some excitement in the presence of the moment. I felt a tad over zealous by showing ups so early, but was more than anything ready to see my future husband for the first time on wedding day.

I sat quietly as my masi pinned a bhindi to my head just before the vidhi started. Looking down at the color of my henna, I couldn’t help but smile as I heard Baa’s words from mehndi night in my ear: “Beta, dark color means deep love.” She’d said this with a knowing smile I was beyond grateful to see; marrying in to a strong Gujarati family means honoring the strong family ties between the generations. I thank universe daily they everyone had such an open mind and heart when they were presented with the idea of adding a different culture to their family.

  I looked at my hands and studied their color further, deep red; remnants of the paste still clung to my skin. Choosing to focus on my patterned hands other than my nerves seemed to steady me, though I felt like I could see the red hue deepen with each step I took, almost psychedelic and moving. The color seemed to brighten with every hug and touch and there were moments when I thought the design would climb right up my arms and legs. My skin transformed before my own eyes.

I saw actual stars when I finally got to see Neil. We found each other in the open hall way, before anyone saw us, and exchanged a real hug. I was awash with comfort and my nerves steadied instantly though tears welled up in my eyes.

I thought for sure when Neil touched me the henna would magically remain unfading.

  The vidhi came and went quickly, and the afternoon before the wedding and reception went by just the same. I felt like a total maniac all afternoon, completely devoid of any and all chill.

While my moms and sister had their hair and makeup done, my body decided to respond to the sense of overwhelming love by mixing that up real good with the tiny bit of the caffeine I had, and all of the excitement I felt about the wedding. I have NEVER felt so out-of-body. I did everything I could possibly think of to calm my nerves, find my zen without addressing to the crowd that every atom in my body was floating apart. My years-long friend, hair guru, and mom to the dumplin’ I looked after for a while and still just adore to pieces, was finishing up with Mrs. Daksha when some sort of crazy, unbreathable vibe took me over. I sat down, then stood up and turned in a circle and just stopped and stared at all the makeup on the bed. I couldn’t really breathe and didn’t want to admit it.

At this point, I had: laid flat, stood on my head, peed about a dozen times, drank half a gallon of water, nibbled on some pouris, blasted chill, lo-fi beats, drank coffee….I tried it all to keep myself calm. And then, I felt the whole of my body turn in to jello. “Can I take a hot shower? Like RIGHT now?” I addressed this plea to Rhianna while attempting to remain cool. She gave me the most sincere “OH FCK” look and said, “Ummm sure yesokaylove, can we cover it?” responding to my paling skin and perfectly pre-curled hair. “Mmmmm,” was the only response I could muster. I vaguely remember Michael leaving the room, but moments later he rushes to the rescue by providing not two but four shower caps and I was in the shower locating Ujjayi in no time.

Another conversation with the shower head.

When I came out in my long whatever it was I was wearing, I felt collected, and it was my turn to sit in the chair.

It only felt like a few minutes, but I know it was longer. I let the air come in and out of my nose, and only spoke a few times; I can’t for the life of me recall what the last two hours before the wedding was like. All I  knew  in that moment was that my future was about to begin.

  I floated down that aisle, y’all. My mom was floating; I could feel her smiling and that made my heart visible from chest, I just know it did. I feel as though I hovered above the ground during the ceremony and never felt the smile leave my face. I wonder if anyone noticed my feet leave the floor? There are moments that friends have captured that just melt my heart, and there’s so much I could share, but not every detail is meant for the world. If I could put the entire night in a box and keep it forever, I would.

I listened so intently as the priest spoke, yet was busy panning the room with my eyes, in deep observation, memorizing the faces in front of me. I remember squeezing Neil’s hand with every we promise made, and my hand shaking to sign my name, for the first time, as “tj patel.” Always lowercase, with absolutely no explanation.

  Our wedding night whirled on, to the beat of bhangra, bollywood, and everything else under an indoor, evening sun.  A blend of family and friends shared their talents, their words, and most importantly their time with us this night. It all stands out so clearly in my mind, every last little jewel of it. I continuously scanned the room so many times that night just to drink in the amount of people that made the time to celebrate the happiest night of our lives. I could hardly speak at certain points, truly unable to find the gratitude I felt in every inch of my body. I still feel it all.

  It was a starry night indeed, a thick blanket of memories suspended in the sky, for always.

  Neil, I hope every day of our life is filled with memories and tales that take from sunrise to sunset to tell. Thank you for giving me your family, for giving me this day and everything that it represented. Thank you for the love I feel from you every day and the immense joy I have; you are solely responsible for helping me create that daily in my life. To the brightest light in my life, I will always treasure every single moment of this remarkable, sparkling, unforgettable moment. I love you.

  We have so many people to thank and we love you each so so much we are bursting.

            mrs. patel: part 1, the wedding My limited library of words seems dismally insufficient when I think about describing the most love-filled week of my life, but the details below are my best attempt at painting the picture for you, and for me.

[hdcurrentenjoyalways-blog]

Happiness Is Everything In Life

When most of us think about what makes us happy, we tend to focus on the “things” in life that we crave or long to own. These things may be concrete consumables or they may be intangible resources, such as “time,” “inner peace,” or “true love.”

It is easier for us to create a list of what we want the world to give us than it is to think in terms of what we can give back to the world.

We live in a world of instant feedback and conspicuous consumption. It may be experienced firsthand through the “Buy Now” button on Amazon’s website or through the obsession with following celebrities’ tweets or video reviews of products, films, and life, in general.

It is amazing how many “things” everyone seems to have in their lives – and how many more things we might desire that we believe will make us feel even better about ourselves in relation to how we think others feel about us.

It is perhaps the paradoxical desire to divest to have more that has created the hot new trend for “tiny houses” or the online tales of people who are living “off the grid,” (ironic, isn’t it, that we hear about these folks’ experiences online?), or the movement to make do in life with 100 possessions or less. Actually, now that our cellphones can do just about anything that we need them to do – from finding our potential mate to preparing dinner via online ordering from nearby take-out places – making do with less isn’t as austere as it once might have been.

“Down-sizing,” “right-sizing,” or “de-cluttering all reflect the same realization that is gaining momentum – possessions simply won’t bring lasting happiness to our lives.

Happiness is a state of being, not a pile of stuff.

So, I’m going to share with you the Big Four Happiness Factors.

Disclaimer: I’m a counselor, a counselor educator, and more significantly, an unashamed optimist. So I’m going to assume that I am planting the seeds of unimaginable levels of personal growth and development through these next few slides.

The Big Four practices that can change your life for good are friendliness, cheerfulness, compassion, and gratitude.

Let’s break these down.

Friendliness First

Some people can be described as “the type of person who’s never met a stronger.” These are people who meet the world with a pleasant temperament and an openness to new people and new experiences – regardless of who may be placed in their path on any given day.

Friendliness is about offering warmth and good humor to those around you.

It is about being willing to make the first move socially while recognizing that others may be a little slow to warm up and that the rewards for friendliness are not always immediately enjoyed. I once worked with a vibrant and delightful woman in her 70s who avowed that “every day is a new opportunity to add to your collection of friends!” She couldn’t count the number of friends she had and she couldn’t find words to describe the pleasure they brought her in life.

Human beings are social creatures and being kind is a lot more likely to help you build your “tribe” than showing indifference to or disinterest in the people that you might someday need for support or assistance.

Make Cheerfulness Your Default Demeanor

There are plenty of old songs that encourage us to “put on a happy face” or “smile when your heart is breaking,” or “don’t worry, be happy.” Many of us may feel a little confused about why we are always encouraging people to “lie” to themselves.

Actually, there is a Zen koan or saying that states simply, “Practice smiling while peeling carrots.” My yoga instructor always encourages us to smile during the most difficult poses. She asks the question, “Are you smiling because you are happy or are you happy because you are smiling?”

She was on to something important.

Being able to offer a sunny disposition to the world, regardless of your inner state, actually encourages you to physically feel better!

So when someone else is turning to you to help them deal with their problems, smiling at them will help you let go of your frustration and exhaustion and be present for them in an awesome way.

Smiles are contagious, too, and if we are able to find the energy to offer our own smile to others, even when our inner world is falling apart, we are going to feel better when our smile is returned.

Seeing someone offer you a genuine smile has actually been found to be emotionally and mental healing.

When You’re Feeling Lonely, Do This . . .

Did you know that simply imagining that you are being smiled at by someone you love is just as powerfully healing as having that person present?

Close your eyes for a moment. Now, imagine being with someone you love and who cares about you and who isn’t here with you today. Now, imagine this person offering you a warm smile. Once you’ve locked that image in place, take a deep breath and slowly open your eyes. Did you find you were smiling just thinking about that special person’s smile? Did you feel warmth around their heart, like a hug, as you imagined that person?

Yep, it works almost every time!

NOW, if you need one more reason to be cheerful movies, how about this.

Research has shown that when patients grimace during medical treatments or procedures, they actually feel MORE PAIN than those who do not.

Gritting your teeth and bearing it is not the best option. Letting yourself smile in the midst of struggle is what brings a change in perception.

Be empathetic to those who might seek assistance from you and offer them extra support by way of an encouraging smile. When you use your warm presence to help them get through difficult times, the pay-off can be huge!

Be Compassionate

Offering compassion to others is another charitable act that positively influences the giver. When we accept others’ shortcomings or cut others slack for their own wrongs or missteps, we are actually valuing humanity over someone else’s personal flaws.

Most of us are truly doing the best we can at any given moment. Sure, some days our “best” is far from “enough,” and there are days when we know that we are guilty of giving less where we probably should have tried harder to give more.

No one is at 100 percent of their game every day. However, if you accept the shortfall of another, the windfall for you is a happier life.

Offer Gratitude

Whatever you have in life and wherever you are, you can find some reason to be grateful. Today, you may be anxious, but you showed up, for instance.

Acknowledging your own good fortune – no matter how seemingly slight or minimal at the moment – can actually enhance your overall wellbeing.

Researchers have found that being truly grateful for what you have can yield important physical benefits – we sleep better and enjoy better relationships!

Not only that, but researchers have also found that your level of gratitude is inversely proportion to your level of depressed feelings or sadness.

The more grateful you are in life, the better the chances are that you will actually enjoy what you have!

So, I’ve shared the Secret to Happiness. Being happy is that simple. But maybe you’re wondering, “Why bother being happy”? There’s so much drama with politics, healthcare, the economic crisis, global warming, domestic strife, you name it! I get it. Sometimes it seems that if you’re expecting the world to make you happy, it simply isn’t going to happen.

However, you might realize the value of instilling these four practices into your daily life if you realize that choosing to engage in health-promoting behaviors will positively influence your own satisfaction with life – as well as of the lives of those around you!

Happy people enjoy less stressful lives!

Happy people are protected against some forms of chronic illnesses.

In fact, happy people actually live longer, too!

Plus, you are a LOT MORE FUN to be around if you’re feeling good about life!

You don’t have to win the lottery, earn a 4.0, bowl a 300, find the perfect job, find true love, or live a perfect life to find happiness.

You just need to do four things:

Meet the world with a positive attitude.

Smile at and befriend others.

Cut us all a little slack.

Be consciously grateful for all that you do have rather than worrying about why you do not.

Why be happy? Because those of us who see the world as a good place actually will enjoy the present moment more fully and typically have a few more moments in life to enjoy that the Debby Downers around us.

Be happy – just do it.

[dearworldnews]

The Internet, Like Everything Else, Is About Choice

Dear Internet Critics, Please remember that like everything else, the Internet is about choice. The recent Senate hearings regarding the role of the Internet in the alleged Russian attempts to influence the 2016 presidential elections have sparked another round of discussions about the perils of the Internet, not just its role in politics, but also the way it destroys our civility, and the like. Now one of the perils of the Internet is that it tempts us to comment extensively on things that we haven't really thought about enough and don't know enough about. I will resist that temptation and not embark on a lecture on how to fix the Internet. But I will mention one aspect of all this which, as I hope to demonstrate below, I am competent to talk about: let us not forget that the Internet, like most everything else in our lives, is subject to choice. While we cannot control what others put out there, we can control what we read, what we react to and how, and what we put out there. I am not saying that this is the solution to all the (very real) problems with the Internet, but it might just be more powerful than it appears. As the late Robert M. Pirsig once so aptly put it:

The place to improve the world is first in one’s own heart and head and hands, and then work outward from there.   ~Robert M. Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Cahuilla Indian Country in the Western Colorado Desert of Southern California

I cannot think of a better way to reinforce my point than to share with you a little anecdote, a vignette really, of what I think was a judicious use of the Internet on my part. The story may not amount to much, but I feel that the sum total of experiences of this nature has elevated my life in ways unimagineable just a few decades ago.

My story takes place in the desert of the American Southwest, more precisely, in the ancestral lands of the Cahuilla Indians in Southern California. The Cahuillas are somewhat different from many other Native Americans insofar as they had little contact with the Spanish, and they did not encounter Anglo-Americans until the 1840s. Therefore, the mid-1800s found them living an unaltered traditional lifestyle as hunters and gatherers. The subsequent history of their territory is an odd one: the northern part has turned into the (sub)urban behemoth of Palm Springs and Palm Desert, and the date farms of Indio and Coachella. The southern part, on the other hand, contains some of the remotest and least travelled backcountry in the American West. It is here that one can find remnants of Cahuilla Indian villages, camps, and scattered homesites. The Cahuillas did not build cliff dwellings, so there is nothing nearly as spectacular as, say, Mesa Verde, or the cliff dwellings of Utah's red rock country. In fact, the traces of Cahuilla habitation are so faint that a person with an untrained eye can walk right through a village site and not even notice it.

In the spring of 2017, I went on a backpacking trip in Cahuilla Indian country whose purpose was to climb an unnamed mountain and to find a Cahuilla camp that is mentioned in a ranger's notes from the 1950s. I made the mountain (the photograph above shows the view from the top), and by some combination of clever scouting and incredibly dumb luck I found the camp in the vast open space seen in the photograph. I have spent enough time in the desert to recognize the collection of flat sleeping spaces that have been cleared of rocks. But that's not really evidence until one also finds the potsherds that invariably adorn the locations of camps and villages, at least those that are remote enough to see almost no visitors. [1]

Potsherd in Cahuilla Indian Camp

Yours Truly's Camp above Cahuilla Indian Camp

Before I can get to my point, I have to also tell you that on the evening before embarking on this trip, I had a casual conversation at a coffeehouse with a fellow who, upon hearing about my plans, endeared himself to me by not warning me of the rattlesnakes, like almost everybody else always does. Instead, he told me to beware of the ghosts of the Cahuillas shooting arrows at me, and he even did the whooshing sound of a flying arrow. What a nice way to be sent on my way.

Imagine my surprise when, on the second evening of my trip, after coming down from the mountain, I was standing on a rock above the Cahuilla camp, looking at the sunset, and all of a sudden there was the whooshing sound of an arrow flying by me. And another. And another, and another, and another. These were not vague or distant sounds, sounds that needed interpretation. This was the loud and clear sound of something arrow-like flying right by me. I know, because believe me, when you're out there in that forbidding, trailless desert, your senses work perfectly well. If they didn't, you probably wouldn't be alive. And the weirdest thing was, I couldn't see anything. It didn't seem possible that something big enough to make that sound could go by me so fast that I wouldn't catch as much as a glimpse of it.

I was torn between enjoying the thrill of ghosts of Native Americans shooting invisible arrows at me and worrying because I was alone out in the desert, where survival is a major concern, and something was happening for which I didn't have an explanation. I ended up settling for the lame and not very plausible explanation that it was a fast-flying insect, like a locust, that could do that. Good enough for the moment.

After a good night's sleep under the stars, a hot day's hike out, and a bone-shaking drive back to the paved road I lost no time finding Internet access to research the matter. Now how do you go about that? I entered something absurdly vague like, "whooshing sound in the desert at dusk" in the search box, and within minutes, I had my answer: it's hummingbirds that do that. Male hummingbirds have a dive-bombing flight maneuver where they come down from 150 feet or more at up to 60 mph, only to abruptly turn horizontal or back up. They use that maneuver to impress females during courtship, to intimidate intruders, or, ostensibly, just for the heck of it.

A Male Anna's Hummingbird Doing a Display Dive, Captured from High-Speed Video

Relative to body length, that speed makes the humble hummingbird the fastest animal on earth, and it outspeeds the spaceshuttle as well as a fighter jet.

Speed Comparison Relative to Body Length

I had seen hummingbirds in camp earlier, one of them hovering directly in front of the bright orange Gatorade jar that you can see in the photograph of my camp above, apparently attracted by the bright orange color. So despite the fact that I don't have conclusive proof, this is a plausible explanation: one or more hummingbirds were dive-bombing at me from above, turning forward directly above my head, without ever coming into my sight. They may have been trying to scare me out of their territory, or perhaps my lanky figure standing on a rock decked out in Under Armour colors was arousing their curiosity just like the Gatorade jar had earlier. [2]

You may wonder why I never looked up to where the sound was coming from. I have asked myself that question, and I have gone on the Internet to learn more about sound localization. It looks like sound localization in the vertical plane is not very well understood. I have noticed since that when music comes out of speakers in the ceiling, I often have trouble locating it, and it doesn't really seem to be coming from above. I guess I need this whole ghost arrow thing to happen again some time so I can catch one of these little critters in the act.

The bottom line is, what I'm trying to say is, this kind of thing is what I use the Internet for, and I'm having a blast. What I do is much the same as before, like going to absurdly remote places in desert. But having access to all this information feels like a veil has been lifted from the world. Everything seems more focused, more brightly colored, illuminated. People talking trash on social media is pretty much off my radar. I know that there are problems with that, and ignoring them doesn't solve them. But a lot of talk doesn't solve anything either. Let us make good choices and encourage others to do so as well.

Sincerely Yours, The Fool on the Hill

Notes

[1] Since this was a camp and not a village, there are no morteros (grinding holes in the rock) that could be used as evidence.

[2] Or else, they were saying to each other, "Hey, look at the a**hole standing on the rock rubbernecking at the sunset. Let's play the ghost-of-the-Cahuillas-shooting-arrows thing on him. That'll be fun."

[alexander40wong]

The 13 Best Vegan Restaurants In London

If you’re not already vegan or vegetarian, you probably know a few people who are. And finding somewhere in London that’ll cater to the dairy, meat and egg-free people in your group isn’t always the easiest thing.

Most London restaurants will have a few vegan options on their menu, but they can be a bit on the unimaginative side. Luckily, London’s got some fantastic vegetarian and entirely vegan restaurants – and, trust us – they’re so good, even the meat-eaters among you won’t mind the change of scene. So to save you a bit of time, here’s our pick of the best places to eat vegan in north, south, east, central and west London.

Central

1. Mildred’s Soho

The vibe: A London classic

Mildred’s was a bit of a revolutionary arrival when it opened in the late 80s. Most vegetarian dining in the city at the time was focused on the wholesome and worthy. But Mildred’s aimed to serve veggie food which was tasty and tempting, while still being good value.

Almost thirty years later, their menu still includes an international mix of dishes, including curries, burgers and fresh pasta. And much of the menu is vegan-friendly (including the wine list).

They moved to a larger location in 2000, but it still gets pretty busy most nights. And with a no booking policy, expect to queue for a table – and while you do, sample bar’s cocktail menu.

New branches of Mildred’s have also opened in in King’s Cross and Camden (and unlike the Soho branch, they’re open on Sundays). They’re also set to open a Dalston outpost very soon.

Website and Twitter

Where: 45 Lexington Street, W1F 9AN  Nearest Tube: Piccadilly Circus.  Opening Times: Mon-Sat: 12pm-11pm, Sun: Closed

2. Vanilla Black

The Vibe: Award-winning vegetarian fine-dining

Vanilla Black was London’s first vegetarian fine-dining restaurant. You won’t find veggie curries or pasta bakes here – they’ve truly earned their star recommendation in the Michelin guide, among other honours.

They aim to innovative, so their menu is constantly changing. But there’ll always be several vegan options, including a 5 course menu with optional wine pairings.

Website and Twitter

Where: 17-18 Took’s Court, EC4A 1LB  Nearest Tube: Chancery Lane Opening Times: Mon-Sat: 12pm-2.30pm, 6pm-10pm, Sun: Closed

Itadaki Zen, Kings Cross

The vibe: Organic and sustainable Japanese cuisine

Itadaki Zen is a quiet, calm spot in one of London’s busiest areas.

It was Europe’s first organic and vegan Japanese restaurant, and roughly translated “Itadaki” means “to take the food life” and “Zen” means “to fix or mend”. Fitting, then, that every item on their menu is designed to nourish both mind and body. You’ll find authentic takes on Japanese classics like tofu and tempura, as well as an extensive list of tea.

The kitchen’s really careful about producing as little waste as possible, and they encourage diners to approach ordering food in a similar way. So, if you’ve ordered a bit too much, just let your server know. They’ll happily box up your leftovers to take away.

Look out for their busy events programme too, including art shows and workshops.

Website and Facebook

Where: 139 King’s Cross Road, WC1X 9BJ Nearest Tube: King’s Cross St Pancras Opening Times: Mon-Fri: 12pm-3pm, 6pm-10pm, Sat: 6pm-10pm, Sun: Closed

3. Manna, Primrose Hill

The vibe: London’s original veggie restaurant

Primrose Hill’s Manna was one of London’s first veggie restaurants, and celebrates its 50th anniversary in October 2017.

The restaurant’s menu is very much focused on cosy and comforting dishes like bangers and mash, tarts, enchiladas and nachos. But it’s all 100% vegan, including the drinks. They also do cookery classes, and have a bakery and catering service.

Website

Where: 4 Erskine Road, Primrose Hill, NW3 3AJ  Nearest Tube: Chalk Farm Opening Times: Tue-Fri: 12pm-3pm, 6.30pm-10pm, Sat: 12pm-3pm, 6pm-10pm, Sun: 12pm-8.30pm, Mon: Closed

West

4. Farmacy, Westbourne Grove

The vibe: The most Instagram-friendly veggie place in town

If your feeds are full of photos of your food, this is the place for you. Everything about Farmacy is beautiful – from the rustic chic decor, to the perfectly arranged dishes.

They’re all about the “clean indulgence”. That means the menu’s split between perfectly virtuous breakfast and lunch dishes, and indulgent (but just as healthy) takes on things like burgers and ice cream sundaes.

They’ve also got a yoga studio in the back – but maybe wait until after the class to eat brunch.

Website and Instagram

Where: 74 Westbourne Grove, W2 5SH  Nearest Tube: Royal Oak/Bayswater Opening Times: Mon-Wed: 9am-11am, 12pm-10pm, Thur-Fri: 9am-11am, 12pm-11pm, Sat: 9am-4pm, 6pm-11pm, Sun: 9am-6pm

5. The Gate, Hammersmith

The vibe: Classic East-meets-West dining

Hammersmith’s The Gate is a bit of a veggie legend in the city; it’s been run by Adrian and Michael Daniel since 1989. And, while they’ve since opened branches in Islington and Marylebone too, the Hammersmith original is their most atmospheric. It was a former artist’s studio (and it’s right by the Eventim Apollo, if you’re looking for a pre-gig dinner).

The Daniels draw on their family’s diverse cultural background including Indian, Arabic and traditional Jewish food. You’ll also find classic European, Asian and American dishes on the menu, and almost everything is suitable for vegans.

Website and Twitter

Where: 51 Queen Caroline Street, W6 9QL  Nearest Tube: Hammersmith Opening Times: Mon-Fri: 12pm-2.30pm, 6pm-10.30pm, Sat: 12pm-3pm, 5pm-10.30pm, Sun: 12pm-9.30pm

6. 222 Veggie Vegan, West Kensington

The vibe: Eco-conscious dining. With a great lunchtime buffet.

Opened in 2004, 222 Veggie Vegan is one of London’s most popular vegan restaurants. Especially at lunchtime, when they do an excellent buffet, followed by a classic, candlelit a la carte menu in the evening.

All dishes are low-salt, low-fat and non-GM, and they never deep-fry or microwave, so it’s all pretty healthy. But don’t worry – you’ll still find a good, lengthy list of desserts. If you’re feeling indecisive, go for the 222 Pancake. That’s their signature pudding, which is smothered in vanilla and chocolate sauces and vegan ice cream.

Website

Where: 222 North End Road, West Kensington, W14 9NU  Nearest Tube: West Kensington/West Brompton (Overground) Opening Times: Mon-Sun: 12pm-3.30pm, 5.30pm-10.30pm

North

7. Haunt, Stoke Newington

The vibe: Stylish bar with great burgers

Stoke Newington is one of London’s hottest dining destinations right now. So, of course the neighbourhood’s got a great vegan place.

Haunt’s kitchen serves an entirely vegan menu. And it’s also got a lively bar, which regularly hosts gigs and cabaret shows. Among the highlights are their burger selection, particularly the jackfruit burger, which is meaty enough to satisfy even non-veggie diners.

Website and Twitter

Where: 182 Stoke Newington Road, N16 7UY  Nearest Tube: Rectory Road (Overground) Opening Times: Tue-Thur: 5pm-11pm, Fri: 5pm-2am, Sat: 11am-2am, Sun: 11am-9pm, Mon: Closed

8. Cookies and Scream, Holloway

The vibe: Gluten-free sweet treats

Think going vegan means giving up the sweets? Head to Cookies and Scream on the Holloway Road – an all vegan, all gluten free bakery.

Their products are prepared fresh every day, so the menu’s constantly changing. However, you can expect to find a tempting range of cookies, pies, donuts (oven-baked rather than deep fried for extra lightness) and thick shakes – made from vegan and gluten-free ice cream and milk.

Website and Instagram

Where: 130 Holloway Road, N7 8JE  Nearest Tube: Holloway Road Opening Times: Sun-Thurs: 10am-8pm, Fri-Sat: 10am-9pm

East

9. 90 Degree Melt, Stepney Green

The vibe: American-style comfort food

For more vegan-friendly comfort food, check out Stepney Green new arrival, 90 Degree Melt.

Offering vegetarian versions of American diner classics, most items on the menu can be ordered vegan style. And, considering that they’ve got eight different types of grilled cheese sandwich on their menu, that’s pretty impressive.

Best of all, much of their menu is served tapas-style, so you can try a bit of everything.

Website and Twitter

Where: 4BJ, 235 Mile End Road, E1 4AA Nearest Tube: Stepney Green Opening Times: Mon-Fri: 10am-10pm, Sat: 11am-10pm, Sun: 11am-4pm

10. Fed By Water, Dalston

The vibe: Italian cuisine

Fed by Water is London’s first all-vegan Italian restaurant. In fact, its vegan versions of traditionally meat and dairy-heavy dishes taste as good as the real thing.

And there’s an added scientific twist. Everything at Fed by Water is prepared with purified water (which inspired the restaurant’s name), apparently for the taste and nutritional benefits.

We can’t comment on the latter, but we do know that their carbonara pasta and pizzas taste very, very good.

Website and Twitter

Where: Dalston Cross Shopping Centre, 64 Kingsland High Street, E8 2LX  Nearest Tube: Dalston Kingsland (Overground) Opening Times: Mon-Sun: 11am-11pm

South

11. The Waiting Room, Deptford

The vibe: Cool and cosy coffee bar

The Waiting Room is a cool and cosy little vegetarian/vegan cafe and coffee shop just under the arches by Deptford Station. Get a caffeine kick to see you through the morning commute, or stop by at lunchtime and try one of their excellent bagels. Or if you’re feeling really indulgent try one of their burgers or hot dogs.

Food and drinks are available to takeaway, but if you can find a free seat in this intimate little space, it’s worth taking the time to eat-in. They’ve got a well-stocked book exchange to browse through, and their super-cool playlists come highly recommended.

Facebook and Twitter

Where: 142 Deptford High Street, SE8 3PQ  Nearest Tube: Deptford (National Rail) Opening Times: Mon-Fri: 8am-6pm, Sat: 9am-6pm, Sun: 10am-4pm

12. The Full Nelson, Deptford

The vibe: Cocktails, junk food and great deals

The Full Nelson is found on Deptford Broadway, just a few minutes’ walk away from its sister restaurant The Waiting Room. Offering cocktails, beers and junk food, the bar’s menu includes vegan-friendly takes on fried chicken, burgers and corn dogs.

Be warned, this intimate bar can get pretty busy, but the drinks, food and friendly atmosphere are all worth braving the crowds for. As is their Wednesday night bargain burger, fries and drink deals.

Website and Twitter

Where: 47 Deptford Broadway, SE8 4PH  Nearest Tube: Deptford Bridge (DLR) Opening Times: Wed-Fri: 4pm-11pm, Sat: 12pm-11pm, Sun: 11am-4pm, Mon-Tue: Closed

13. The Calabash of Culture

The vibe: Chilled-out cafe and art gallery

Originally the Honey Hive cafe, the Calabash of Culture has grown from a small pop-up in the back room of an art gallery, to taking over the entire venue. All their food is vegan, and is broadly Caribbean-inspired. The menu is divided into grains, mains and salads, which you can pick and choose from to suit your own tastes.

Be sure to take the time to admire the artwork on the walls while you’re there. And to also perhaps take a look at the dessert menu, which includes classic cakes and impressive ice cream sundaes.

Website

Where: 21 Sydenham Road, SE26 5EX Nearest Tube: Sydenham (Overground) Opening Times: Mon-Wed: 12pm-8pm, Thurs-Sat: 12pm-10pm, Sun: Closed

Do you have a favourite vegan or vegan-friendly restaurant in London? Let us know your tips in the comments section.

 The post The 13 Best Vegan Restaurants In London appeared first on lastminute.com Blog.

from lastminute.com Blog http://www.lastminute.com/blog/best-vegan-restaurants-london/

[rilenerocks]

One of the things I remember Michael saying to me on many occasions was that he thought I was the most singularly unchanged person that he ever knew. I was forever trying to decide if I should take that as a compliment or not. Since I was only 20 when we met, I figured that in the 46 years we knew each other he probably had a fair view of my behavior. In the end, I agreed with him and viewed “unchanged” not in a pejorative manner, but in a positive one. I’m consistent. My belief system has been in place for a very long time. Of course, I’ve grown, developed, evolved. But my core, my fundamental self is pretty much the same as it was when I was teenager. For people who know me well, that means I’m predictable. And complicated.

My brain speeds along at a rapid clip. I’m always processing. As yet, my motherboard hasn’t failed me. Which means nothing is ever just simple for me. I remember when I saw the movie, The Last Samurai. At a moment when the Tom Cruise character was getting his rear end kicked over and over during sparring practice, a friendly warrior came up to him, tapped him on the forehead and said, “too many mind.” I can relate. I’ve been working on slowing down and adopting practices that to help me

when my start spinning too fast.

I learned how to do revitalizing meditations to help me stay calm and cerebral when Michael was sick and needed my help. I have the Calm app on my phone and I use it regularly. I’m pretty zen when I swim. Still, a lot of my time is spent thinking, analyzing and considering, often about multiple topics simultaneously. It’s just how I roll. I think all this began when I was really young because I remember these same feelings and thoughts from my childhood.

And so it was on my long-desired trip to Glacier National Park, which in its essence was everything I dreamed of and more. I’ve been to a good number of national parks, Acadia just last month. Certain ones had more impact than others. I’ll never forget Bryce Canyon, Zion and Arches. I got to experience those with Michael which enhanced their majesty and spiritual power for me. Being on my own in Glacier, it was all about me, with my forever bond with Michael, tucked into my most interior self, like an extra vital organ. But I saw and felt Glacier through the lens I bring to everything, the one when I am simultaneously in my moment while my mind is zipping along, connecting that moment to how I perceive the world.

I went to Glacier by train which is a great way to travel and really see parts of the country that are off the main road and certainly hidden when flying. I spent almost all my waking hours staring out the window. I don’t want to miss anything. I’ve never tired of seeing cattle and horses, not since I was a little kid traveling up and back between Iowa and Chicago. On an overnight rail trip, there is so much more as you travel from state to state. I saw buffaloes and donkeys.

Numerous white tailed deer grazing and springing through the fields right next to the domestic animals. I saw a swift fox. I saw American white pelicans, great blue herons, American kestrels, a ring necked pheasant and lots of red winged blackbirds, mallard ducks and rabbits.

I saw fields planted with beans and wheat and other crops I can’t identify by sight.

The vistas are endless and impressive.

But I also saw small towns that looked economically ravished. Aging buildings and others that have already fallen. There’d be this gorgeous green landscape and suddenly piles of junked cars and garbage would appear.

The shabbiness was a stark contrast to the surrounding lush earth. And then came big sky. Endless miles of beautiful land, absolutely empty. In my mind I was envisioning herds of buffalo and tipis and the native people who made their lives here for countless years before being decimated by the relentless move west by settlers and power brokers. I’m sure that much of the land I saw was owned by big ranching concerns. But it felt so wrong. All the beauty tarnished for me. I can appreciate it but not without thinking of the cost to the people who lived here. Then the reservation appears.

The Blackfeet  reservation is actually a conglomeration of tribes whose general name is Niitsitapi which means “the real people.” I saw buildings with the words “no meth” painter boldly across the walls. The very idea of reservations appalls me. Would you like to live with your people in a designated area? Me neither.

The Blackfeet tribe has rights to parts of Glacier National Park which include their most spiritual locations such as Two Medicine. Ceremonies are still performed there such as sun dances, while sweat lodges are built for the transitions and rituals of native life. I took a boat ride on Two Medicine Lake and went through their valley. You can feel a powerful spiritual presence there. I opened myself up to let it blend in with me and Michael and my own belief system. Certainly not the same as theirs but nonetheless connected if by nothing other than the surrounding natural majesty. The natives call some of the mountains the backbone of the earth. It’s not hard to understand why.

I stayed in East Glacier Lodge which is a beautiful old building with no televisions and sketchy internet. It lends itself well to getting in touch with what this place is supposed to mean to human beings. Their staff all seem to share a common attitude of preserving the nature of the park and its mystical energy. There are tributes to the natives throughout the lodge and the park although for me, it wasn’t enough. Keeping a piece of your ancestral land rings hollow to me. I saw a tall Native American man tending flowers at another lodge. He resembled Will Sampson who played the chief in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. He seemed to enjoy what he was doing and had positive interactions with a few people working with him. Maybe his life is happy. Maybe I’m the one with the problem.

Let me stop and say that I felt everything I hoped to feel at Glacier. As I stood before mountains that are estimated to be between 1600 and 800 million years old, I felt my smallness and the tiny place that I know I occupy, even when things feel huge. I felt the fabric of connection that still binds me to Michael and my love for the earth and its marvels. But then the guide told us that the remaining 20-odd glaciers are expected to be gone by 2030. Unimaginable. Was this destined to happen over a long period of time or isn’t it part of the upheaval we’re seeing all over the world. Climate change. I’ve heard all the arguments from people who say it’s been hot before, we’ve had hurricanes before, we’ve had fires before. Blah-blah-blah. Our planet is threatened. I have no doubt. Blazing hot temperatures in Alaska. Water supplies in India drying up. Europe sweltering. The hottest June on record. Ever. I’m not capable of simply enjoying my good fortune without thinking about all these frightening things. I’ll be dead before the worst stuff happens. But what about all the children and grandchildren? I have hope that brilliant people will find ways to turn some of this around. That we’ll stop burning fossil fuels. That we’ll get rid of plastic in the oceans. That a place like Glacier will still have snowy peaks in the summer. But to ignore it for my own mental well-being? No can do. I had the privilege of seeing so much wildlife in the park. I saw a black bear, a moose, long horned sheep, elk and mountain goats. They’re just doing their thing. But a lot can threaten the ecosystem that supports them and I worry.

Through the train window I saw the amount of flooding that occurred when the Mississippi overflowed its banks, not to mention the smaller rivers nearby. The wooded area and retaining ponds along the tracks are filled with mile after mile of algae bloom. That can’t be a good thing. As I watched animals drinking from this green pea soup I wondered about the chemical runoff from farms into the water table. Not to mention what can happen to people’s drinking water. Still thinking of Flint over here.

So yes, I am thrilled that I got to see this incredible wonder for what is likely the only time in my life. I think that inner city kids from everywhere should be brought on field trips to experience this magnificent place or others like it so they can make an early commitment to trying to rescue the earth and each other. I can’t go back and undo the genocide that happened long before I arrived. But I think it should be remembered and never ignored. Another thing Michael said to me frequently was this: “ Great. So as long as you know that somewhere someone might be having a problem or that there are systemic issues, you’re going to be bummed out. Living with you will sure be fun.” Well, we did have fun. But there’s more to life than that.

Overdrive One of the things I remember Michael saying to me on many occasions was that he thought I was the most singularly unchanged person that he ever knew.