#and The Worst fashion sense on the planet

[fxckn-sxck-fr]

id lovee to hear ur rankings of the comic book men from appearing to be the most normal to something is obviously wrong w them (if that makes sense... like,,,, who is and isnt an obv red flag)

ur writing keeps me fed :3

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐑𝐄�� 𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐆𝐒…

!!! GN reader, manipulation, gaslighting, mentions of stalker-ish picture-taking, mentions of schizophrenia and anxiety, poor treatment of mental illness, mentions of violent behaviors, murderous Bucky Barnes, Tim Drake (he’s just a problem), mentions of suicidal tendencies, can be translated as platonic or romantic.

EAAAAATT!!!!! EEEEAAAAATTTT!!!!!!!!! EAT MY WRITING!!!! CONSUME IT!!!!!!!!!!!

Remember, this is from least to most, meaning we’ll talk about the seemingly well-adjusted folks first and gradually move up to the, “okay, what the fuck is wrong with him” peeps.

Wally West: The way he’s playing everyone like a fiddle is downright disrespectful. He’s filled to the brim with green flags, easily appearing as one of the safest guys on the planet. Even when you start to suspect something, you have to constantly second guess yourself, because come on… it’s Wally. What the fuck can he do wrong? Don’t even bother voicing any of your concerns. No one — and I mean no one — will believe you. Having problems with Wally West? The embodiment of a warm summer evening? Damn, that sounds like a you problem. Poor Wally, having to deal with a crazy weirdo.

Dick Grayson: He’s got an amazing personality and pretty privilege working for him. At this rate, the masses manipulate themselves. Only those who are extremely perceptive will pick up on the cold glint in his eyes, and even then, the mystique only adds to his charm. By the time you realize he’s been hiding a darker side, it’s too late. Everyone’s too captivated by how endearing Dick is to hear you out. Even those who know him personally — who know about his struggles and rough patches — think you’re full of shit. Dick’s an emotionally mature man, so why don’t you just talk it out with him?

Steve Rogers: This is a bit unfair, considering the leverage he’s granted as Captain America, but hey… work what you got. While it may seem obvious to you that he’s way too overbearing and protective, good luck trying to get other people on your side. Everyone else thinks it’s a part of his 40s charm. Social norms were just different back then; why can’t you be more appreciative of his old-fashioned care? Besides, you’re probably overreacting. Is it really that bad? Steve is the leader of the Avengers, so maybe you’re just taking his authoritative demeanor the wrong way.

Clark Kent: I’m gonna be so for real, any man from a fuckass state like Kansas is going to come with some personality quirks. People will probably give him the benefit of the doubt by default. Just a farm boy trying to navigate the big city and can’t even hurt a fly. Sure, he can be odd at times, but nothing makes him an inherently bad guy. This is the same man that helps old people cross the street, for god’s sake! He most definitely means well, it’s just a matter of setting boundaries with him. What’s the worst he can do?

Remy LeBeau: Despite what differing opinions may say about The Gambit, Remy seems like he’s got his head on his shoulders. His “red flags” are more on the blurry side. Do you count excessive flirting as a red flag? What about hiding behind charisma and a fake ego instead of going to therapy? Some people may say yes, others no. But in terms of glaring red flags, Remy’s relatively clean. We’ve all got our issues, no? Being a thief doesn’t make you a psycho. That being said, due to Remy’s shifty past, people may be more inclined to listen should you ever express that something’s wrong.

Peter Parker: Honestly… he’s a bit of a weirdo. Nothing obvious at first, but the longer you know him, the more behaviors you may pick up on that make you go, “oh… well… that’s weird”. Take his Polaroid obsession, for example. He’s got at least one photo in every jacket pocket, dozens in his wallet, and a fuck ton in his desk. Poor guy accidentally spilled them all over the ground once, which naturally sparked rumors. But Peter’s a sweetheart. Clingy, but still a sweetheart. Maybe he’s just a little messed up due to everything he’s lost in his life.

Bruce Wayne: Okay. Red flags in the playboy billionaire Bruce Wayne? Absolutely unheard of. He’s an absolute angel. According to all of the stan accounts out there, he could do nothing wrong. But red flags in the real Bruce Wayne? Where do we even begin. Distrusting as fuck, paranoid, argumentative, the occasional fit of violence, a known manipulator and liar… want me to keep going, because I can. It’s very hard to rank Bruce due to the ginormous contrast between general public opinion and those who actually know him, so he goes smack in the middle. Billionaire Bruce Wayne would never be a horrible person to you, but the real Bruce Wayne 100% would.

Jaime Reyes: Because of how mental illness is stigmatized, Jaime’s unfortunately labeled to be dangerous. But it’s not really his fault. That damn scarab has him muttering to himself like a crackhead, and naturally assumptions will be made. When actually given a chance, people will learn that Jaime’s a nice kid. He just probably struggles with schizophrenia or really bad anxiety. Yes, his paranoia can get bad, but again; mental illness. He’s never proven himself to a threat, despite what others may think. He just needs help (but there’s no way to combat the manipulation of Khaji Da. Jaime lost that battle the moment he became Blue Beetle).

Hal Jordan: Oh, yeah. He’s got red flags alright. But they’re mostly normal ones, like his ego and horrendous stubborn streak. Lots of guys out there are like that, and are they considered freaks? No. Well, not all of them. However, it is a bit concerning that he’s willing to throw hands at the drop of a hat. Bro’s one major freak out away from catching assault charges like they’re Pokémon. But if it’s any consolation, it should be noted that he hasn’t gotten into major legal trouble. On Earth. Yet. Some call him rough around the edges, others call him a severely troubled individual. Either way, he definitely needs to seek professional help.

Scott Summers: MAJOR red flags. He’s an overbearing control freak that really needs to work on his… well… his everything. Emotional intelligence, temper, daddy issues… yeah, no. He’s an amazing leader, but probably someone you should steer clear from otherwise. Most wouldn’t be surprised if you two were having issues. It’s not like he wears all of his problems on his sleeve; the iceberg goes much deeper than that. Though he sure as hell doesn’t present himself as a well-adjusted member of society. Proceed at your own risk. Don’t say you weren’t warned, because you probably were.

Bucky Barnes: This is the opposite of Captain America’s case. His reputation as the Winter Soldier kind of skews the perception of him to be a walking red flag. And you know, he really is. Bucky is extremely dangerous. Down to snap necks anytime, anywhere, no amount of charm or endearing quirks will make people feel fully safe around him. His history of violence did not stop post-brainwashing. And it’s not like he’s hiding it, either. There’s this crazed gleam in his eyes that just screams “fuck around and find out,” no matter what his mood is. Who in their right mind would involve themself with THE Winter Soldier?! Yeah, no shit you’re having issues with him. He is an issue.

Tim Drake: Bro is the epitome of “you’re scaring the hoes.” He could be walking down the street — face neutral, hands in his pockets — and total strangers will get the sense that something is deeply wrong with him. The aura around him exudes the reddest of flags. Yes, his face and intelligence are attractive, but even those who have fallen for his pretty boy swag can’t help but sigh dreamily and think, “he really needs to be institutionalized.” Disturbing humor. Creepy staring. Mood swings. Suicidal tendencies. Sadomasochism to the max. The list goes on and on and on. If Dead Dove: Do Not Eat was a person, it’d be him. What were you expecting? It’s Tim fucking Drake.

[t1oui]

thinking about how living w regulus would affect harry like

he's such a fucking snob about everything. food, decor, fashion, you name it, he's got opinions on it.

he does ballet despite being the least graceful person on the planet. he's somehow pretty good at it, likely out of spite

speaks french

very much a cat person, has a cat named leo who is his baby

like yk how james and sirius are extremely codependent? that's how harry is w leo. both of them can not handle being apart from each other too long

reads a lot of stories

thinks seeker is the best quidditch position

on that note, lots of slytherin house pride. james hates it. harry refuses to put any gryffindor decorations up in his room

harry loves taking pictures just like reg so the house is filled with photographs

and ofc harry is snobby about what types of cameras he uses thanks to reg. james now just lets them deal with the cameras & photography stuff bc he's scared to get the wrong thing lol

harry is taller than reg but bc dysphoria all of reg's old clothes (like quidditch jerseys + hoodies and stuff) are his size so half his wardrobe is from reg's hogwarts days

definitely the type of guy to change his bedding & curtains & everything in his room based on the season. will anybody actually be in there other than him and his parents? not really, but he MUST redecorate

idk what this even means but snobby about candles. this is another thing james is scared to buy him

harry and reg speak french w each other more than english

since james doesn't speak french w harry (i hc he's only comfortable speaking it w reg) harry is used to having a conversation in two different languages so sometimes he'll be speaking french w his friends without noticing

he'll be in the middle of a rant and realize they don't understand a thing he's saying lol

reg and harry control the decorating for every holiday, every birthday, etc.

the one thing harry knows how to do that reg doesn't/reg didn't teach him is cooking. reg never cooked for himself as a child so james was the one who taught him

doesn't look like it most of the time but all of harry's clothes are very expensive... did i mention he's a snob

harry is such a dry texter/writer... he's such a dick about grammar when it comes to writing even tho he can barely string a sentence together when speaking

deeply sarcastic (look! a canon detail! we never thought we'd see that on this account, did we?)

will take his partners on the most expensive dates & whatnot like it's nothing... cedric the farmboy™️ is not prepared

writes sad boy poetry when he gets annoyed w someone... like harry will storm off all pissed and then he comes back 20 mins later with a beautifully written, very angry poem for whoever made him mad

has so many clothes & different curtains and bedding sets for different seasons that he also uses the closet in the guest room (reg takes up 99% of his and james's closet for the same reason)

has an inherent hatred of fake plants

bedroom is simultaneously tidy and so messy a hurricane might as well have come through

leaves a book behind everywhere he goes

secretly the worst sense of humor lmao

he may not have gotten his love of drawing/painting from regulus, but you def see reg in the way he is, you guessed it, a massive snob about art supplies

soooo indecisive. redoes his room at least twice a year

an asshole when he gets less than 10 hours of sleep... he's mildly tolerable after 3 cups of coffee (black, of course) but you might as well just ignore him until he gets a nap in

on that note is very good at making coffee and is, drum roll please, a massive snob about it. who would've guessed (somebody count how many times i've said snob in this post and comment it please and thank you)

if he doesn't like a gift he's horrible at pretending he's happy w it so people usually go through reg whenever they buy him something... this goes both ways too, people go through harry when buying something for reg

is visually james and lily's but in personality is really just reg's (and also lily's... he definitely inherited his spite from her lol)

is a crazy cat lady by age 20

at least 10 pictures of leo in his room... he has whole photoshoots for her and she poses for them

might as well not hang out w harry at his house bc he'll make out with his cat the whole time

loves going to art museums w regulus

he's a, surprise surprise, snob about art. james just doesn't comment on art altogether atp

his vocabulary is a weird mashup of french, english, and hindi that makes it very hard for anybody who doesn't know him well to understand what he's saying lol

looks angry until he smiles (he got this from lily but a life with reg has perfected it)

needs a golden retriever to his black cat in any given relationship (enter cedric and cho) (yes i'm going to push my rarepair on everyone reading this)

tl;dr being raised by/living w regulus has turned harry into a massive snob about literally everything and regulus is proud of it (blink twice if you need help, james)

[candlecanoe]

Cicero Fryman the first guy to have Frybillion subscribers

[bikerboyfriend]

léo's wardrobe (kinda)

[weirdmageddon]

i love these tags this person is so right

actually, can you imagine if dave was raised by B1 roxy?

i wanna get into this actually

(ok i had to spend a few hours rewriting this because IT DIDNT FUCKING SAVE AFTER FIVE HOURS OF WRITING WHEN MY COMPUTER UPDATED WHILE I WAS AFK so it would mean a lot to show this post some appreciation. i LOVEEE hearing what other people have to say)

even though these things mom does are presented in an extravagant, kitsch, jokey way, her intentions always came from a place of sincerity. she is simply Funnie

but rose reads too far into it and assumes things that aren't there, that her mother is passive-aggressively feigning interest in rose's interests simply because the things she does are so extra. "why do all of this if not to mock me"

im telling you right now if dave lived in this household he wouldn't assume antagonism, he'd go,

don’t forget who LITERALLY patented tangible jpeg artifacts as their post-scratch adult self and scattered shitty scummed up statue of liberties all over the planet. theres no way some of that overboard artful shit wasnt post-ironic / circling back around to genuine funny sincerity

dave's natural state is funny sincerity like roxy. he's had the natural capacity for this type of humor from the start and this is the direction he goes towards when he grows out of his brother's shadow by the end of the comic. dave and roxy share an earnest “so bad its good” type of humor

(lots more under the cut; the length of this meta analysis just got unwieldly with all the pictures and whatnot)

despite the alcoholism, roxy is a supportive mother. she's not the ideal guardian but hells of a lot more supportive of her kid than bro is. if she knew dave's interests she would totally indulge in them with some over the top silly goofy haha shit as a genuine gesture simply because she loves him

rose isn't too keen on it though. but she is more similar to dirk in her natural state of thinking of overthinking shit and assuming the worst, like the tags said

and yes dave got the sweet cuddly yet sometimes backhanded ouppy gene from roxy, probably even moreso lol

roxy's even said rose "sounds like girl dirk"

side tangent here, but this is something i wanna talk about.

i dont think bro should ever be in custody of children ever but if theres anyone who would be up to the task it's rose probably. i know she'd be able to keep up with him. not only does she have a defined personality (dave is more malleable and absorbs his environment like a sponge), if anyone can pick apart B1 dirk's batshit brain and probably be right on the money it's her. lil cal has been pumping patriarchal nonsense into bro's head and rose would be able to bring the fucking facts to the table without losing her own and being a living example of a badass little girl. i also don't think bro would try to force masculine roles onto rose like he did with dave, seeing as she is a girl, so she would actually have more of a leg up and get some passes that dave was never afforded. and rose wouldn't stand idly and accept any bullshit; she is no doormat. and i think this would earn bro's respect

but anyway, from this, couldn't we conclude roxy "sounds like girl dave"?

yeah okay. we havent even gotten into their penchant for funny typos or misspeaks, deliberate or otherwise

so, dave's environment

the sentiment "god you hope you can be as good as your bro at this some day" might have been genuine at the time when he idolized bro but of course he's not able to express that in any sort of sincere fashion because he's in dirk's fucking household. and this level 10 irony shit isnt doing dave any favors

his role models were the Internet and a vague idea of what Bro was like. So he built up his facade based on irony–not the literary definition of irony, as Rose might be quick to point out, but a popular concept of irony based on the idea that things that didn’t make sense actually made sense in some roundabout way. As a master of irony, Dave probably reasoned, he could see in a way other people couldn’t why a world that was scary and didn’t make sense really did make sense, and could therefore convince those people that he was superior to them. And he would wield his knowledge to maintain the appearance of superiority by calling everything ironic and pretending he didn’t care about things that didn’t make sense, and he would use walls of vaguely rhyming words to keep everyone at arm’s length so they wouldn’t discover his insecurities (source)

roxy's style is the embodiment of post-irony. being raised by mom lalonde would be like being raised by joel vinesauce ok

what can i say ….. (getting meta about this actually, hussie got these jpeg wizard wallpapers from a spyware website. link takes some time to load because internet archive)

rose is quick to read post-irony as actually being a joke/insincere, which in bro's case would be true. but i believe dave's natural instinct, outside of the influence of bro, is to read post-irony as genuine, which is exactly how mom serves it. we see this as early as act 3 from him; he understands her motives better than rose does herself:

and in act 6 intermission 2 i think it's pretty clear

but the thing is, it's always genuine from her. dave wouldn't have to second guess it because he's not one to naturally second guess someone's sincerity; that was learned due to his bro being virtually unassailable

there two types of ironies at play here:

seems like a joke, is actually genuine (roxy)

doesnt seem like a joke, is actually a joke (dirk)

you can make the argument that the second is is more psychologically destructive because it makes you question the reality of what is genuine sentiment and what isn't. dave never knew what was genuine and what was irony so he just sort of existed in this sincerity-ironic limbo and always did the opposite of what he genuinely felt on principle even if it always did originate from a genuine place.

"it just a joke bro i was just being ironic i dont actually x" is so much more trust-breaking and psychologically damaging than "wait are you being serious" / "i am being so fucking fr rn davy gravy" / "ok thats actually pretty fucking awesome. giant ass wizard statue" / "RIGHT"

how much about dave would change do you think? his character arc would be completely different for one thing, i think he'd have it good aside from mom's alcohol issues. he'd be left with the sweet and funny parts of him that we see at the end of the comic. the fake coolguy stuff is out, but this remains. this is dave in his element and we see it as early as act 1

he'd probably have no shades growing up in the lalonde residence* either cause those were given to him by bro straight out of the crater as an extension of his own cool image. and john gave dave ben stiller’s aviators for his 13th birthday to replace them so he could “spread his wings”

dave said he was wearing them for the ironies but i kind of doubt it. maybe post-irony but there was some reacharound to it being genuine because dave never put those pointy anime shades on his face again.

*though... it’s kind of hard to imagine him without his shades at all? B2 dave still got stiller’s shades from stiller himself so maybe getting them is a universal constant. i can imagine mom getting him them as a birthday gift cause shes pretty wealthy and probably could buy it out in an auction. but also itd be cool if john still gave him it as a gift

dave is actually a lot more genuine and easy to read than he lets on even when grappling with his upbringing with B1 dirk (again, see this post). this can be seen all throughout he comic but a good example is the evolution of thoughts about his interest in the preserved dead things in his room:

if B1 roxy was dave's guardian he probably WOULD have pursued paleontology because she wouldve indulged him in it and probably find it cool and worthwhile to pursue, instead of allowing dave to flounder under ironic detachment, being poisoned by irony to the point of gaslighting himself into believing he doesnt actually believe he thinks this shit is cool. even if it was indulged in this such a way; a superficially kitsch and ironic appearing presentation, it comes from a genuine place and inspires genuine interest. just read the comments.

basically, i think if B1 roxy raised dave, their relationship would have a surface level appearance of being bizarre or over-the-top but they’d have an unsaid mutual understanding that it’s completely in earnest and just build on each other's funny and absurd gestures of affection. rather than seeing it as one-upping each other, it'd more like collaboration of some silly bullshit that you take a step back and look at full and just say, "fucking incredible"

speaking of paleontology, mom had the proto-ectobiology lab. maybe they'd be able to use the equipment to appearify paradox ghost imprints of the dead shit to create paradox clones of things from the cambrian era??? sounds like a fun mother son bonding activity. and theyd actually put the sciencey shit in the household to use

oh god i know exactly the kinds of music shed listen too also growing up as a teen in the 80s. she on that (post)-punk/art rock/new wave/new romantic mtv stuff. XTC shit fr. this is a B-52S HOUSEHOLD. maybe the associates for the campy melodramatic flair. so he gets to keep the record on his shirt cause he is an enjoyer of the shit in her vinyl collection. dave would still gravitate towards musical expression and music itself but of more variety outside of just rap, with an 80s-90s, even 70s flavor due to mom’s influence. see this for perhaps a glimpse. ​she probably visited new york city a lot for business trips and because the music scene was cool as hell around that time, imports came straight from jfk airport, she probably got in on that a bit and have remnants in the form of vinyls and cassettes. in this way she could be distributing void to dave (influencing him with forgotten / presently irrelevant music). now he can REALLY rave about bands none of his friends have heard of. “hey davy grvay watcha listenin to” (he holds up vinyl cover) “omg snakefinger”

btw dave lalonde would look like this to me

[sunkissedchld]

𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐎 𝐎𝐁𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒: 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

💲 the 6H details routine, so it can also tell about one’s work ethic

capricorn 6H - has a one-track mind when it comes to work. they’re not in the office to make friends, so they may not converse freely with their coworkers like others like to. they may overwork and feel an obligation to put their most effort into their work and the organization they work for. leo 6H - the more recognition they receive, the more work they do. they are innovative and outspoken in whatever field they go into. they may take leadership positions in general, but also when doing group projects or something of that nature. they are encouraging towards their coworkers and may be interested in them as people outside of work. virgo 6H - very detail-oriented in their work. they may plan for the best and worst case scenario because they prefer to be prepared. they may also overwork like capricorns do. they may also like helping others in the work force. if someone is struggling on a group project or just in general, they may help guide that person to the right answer. very responsible and trustworhty as a worker.

💲 the 10H details one’s reputation at work and what they can contribute to society

taurus 10H - has a good fashion sense and looks aesthetically pleasing in the workforce; this could be in relation to literal dressing and appearance, but it can also be applied to their actual work (ie. if they were in graphic design, their graphics would look pleasing to the general public’s eye). provides society with a comforting way of seeing things. pisces 10H - maintains good workplace relationships. may be seen as someone that’s good at planning as they are imaginative and creative and think ahead. they may be seen as a mediator in the workplace. they can provide society with a bit of optimism and a whimsical way of looking at things as opposed to being cynacial and realistic all the time. aries 10H - could often be viewed as a potential leader in the workforce. may be the type to make friends at work in order to boost company morale and encourage others to participate in workplace culture. very active and vocal voice in the workforce. they can provide society with encouragement and competition in a fun way that gets nearly everyone involved.

💲 planets in or making aspects to the work houses (2H, 6H, 10H) can tell more about one’s work ethic, reputation, and success in their life

ie. neptune in the 6H may find it a little hard to keep their mind on work and/or they may daydream about their future job often; sun in the 6H may live and breathe their job and find it hard to break away from it in order to enjoy life or spend time with others.

💲 the signs of the work houses (2H, 6H, 10H) ALONE can not tell you what career you should go into

this is an unpopular opinion as most people are told to look at their 10H in order to see their future career or what they should be doing, but i actually find this limiting! i think a stellium or one’s dominant planet/house can be more informative of a job they would be good at, enjoy as a result of prior interest, and possibly gain material wealth from.

💲 the 2H details what one can gain from work, this can be materially or in others ways (ie. mentally, emotionally, as a lesson, etc.)

virgo 2H - a different life perspective than one you had before, a service-oriented personality, increase in health conciousness leo 2H - leadership skills, prestige and wealth, compassion, attention as a whole, possibly fame sagittarius 2H - a focus on the bigger picture rather than being so detail-oriented, expansion of ideals, acceptance, travel opportunites

𝐌𝐂 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓

💲 the 6H and where virgo sits in your MC persona chart can tell of what job you will end up doing

the 6H and virgo both detail service towards others and jobs are often exactly that - providing a service to other people in order to make a living. aquarius 6H / virgo in 11H - technology, engineering, computer science, activism, humanities taurus 6H / virgo in 10H - banking and financial services, art collector or curator, fashion designer, makeup artist gemini 6H / virgo in 3H - teacher, writer, public relations, public affairs

💲 Juno in your MC persona could tell where your future spouse helps you out in your career endeavors

Juno in 5H - in creative spark and inspiration, in enjoying or finding joy in your work

Juno in 1H - in gaining attention, in first impressions people have of you on the job Juno in 4H - in feeling comfortable and secure in your work, in feeling that your work is what you’re meant to do

💲 asteroids and planets making prominent aspects to Sun in your MC persona can tell more about the job you work or the way you work

💲 Fortuna (19) in the MC persona chart can tell about where you can find luck - good or bad - in your work life

Fortuna in 2H - luck in finances, material possessions, work ethic and values Fortuna in 5H - luck in creative ideas, enjoyment, influence Fortuna in 3H - luck in communication, persuasion, teamwork

💲 north node placement in MC persona can what you need to learn to feel comfortable doing in the workforce

NN in 10H - learning to feel comfortable with having a strong reputation and being in the spotlight; learning to feel comfortable around men NN in 1H - learning to feel comfortable with the way you present yourself to others; learning to feel comfortable with how others view you NN in 11H - learning to feel comfortable with creating friendships; learning to feel comfortable with being a part of a larger culture

𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐑𝐒

💲 Edisona (742) making prominent aspects in your chart can indicate someone being an enterpernuer

edison was more of an enterperneur than inventor, as he often marketed inventions others already made, so that’s why i prefer this interpretation of the asteroid

💲 those interested in journalism and other writing careers should look for Gemini / 3H prominence in their charts (natal and MC persona)

💲 Ceres making prominent aspects in your chart can indicate somone being interested in cooking

💲 those interested in teaching should look for Sagittarius / 9H / 3H prominence in their charts

💲 those interested in graphic design should look for Earth dominance / degrees / placements in their charts

[sunkissedchldrecon]

𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘 𝚘𝚋𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜:

𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚛 𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗

💰 the 6H details routine, so it can also tell about one's work ethic

capricorn 6H - has a one-track mind when it comes to work. they're not in the office to make friends, so they may not converse freely with their coworkers like others like to. they may overwork and feel an obligation to put their most effort into their work and the organization they work for.

leo 6H - the more recognition they receive, the more work they do. they are innovative and outspoken in whatever field they go into. they may take leadership positions in general, but also when doing group projects or something of that nature. they are encouraging towards their coworkers and may be interested in them as people outside of work.

virgo 6H - very detail-oriented in their work. they may plan for the best and worst case scenario because they prefer to be prepared. they may also overwork like capricorns do. they may also like helping others in the work force. if someone is struggling on a group project or just in general, they may help guide that person to the right answer. very responsible and trustworhty as a worker.

💰 the 10H details one's reputation at work and what they can contribute to society

taurus 10H - has a good fashion sense and looks aesthetically pleasing in the workforce; this could be in relation to literal dressing and appearance, but it can also be applied to their actual work (ie. if they were in graphic design, their graphics would look pleasing to the general public's eye). provides society with a comforting way of seeing things.

pisces 10H - maintains good workplace relationships. may be seen as someone that's good at planning as they are imaginative and creative and think ahead. they may be seen as a mediator in the workplace. they can provide society with a bit of optimism and a whimsical way of looking at things as opposed to being cynacial and realistic all the time.

aries 10H - could often be viewed as a potential leader in the workforce. may be the type to make friends at work in order to boost company morale and encourage others to participate in workplace culture. very active and vocal voice in the workforce. they can provide society with encouragement and competition in a fun way that gets nearly everyone involved.

💰 planets in or making aspects to the work houses (2H, 6H, 10H) can tell more about one's work ethic, reputation, and success in their life

ie. neptune in the 6H may find it a little hard to keep their mind on work and/or they may daydream about their future job often; sun in the 6H may live and breathe their job and find it hard to break away from it in order to enjoy life or spend time with others.

💰 the signs of the work houses (2H, 6H, 10H) ALONE can not tell you what career you should go into

this is an unpopular opinion as most people are told to look at their 10H in order to see their future career or what they should be doing, but i actually find this limiting! i think a stellium or one's dominant planet/house can be more informative of a job they would be good at, enjoy as a result of prior interest, and possibly gain material wealth from.

💰 the 2H details what one can gain from work, this can be materially or in others ways (ie. mentally, emotionally, as a lesson, etc.)

virgo 2H - a different life perspective than one you had before, a service-oriented personality, increase in health conciousness

leo 2H - leadership skills, prestige and wealth, compassion, attention as a whole, possibly fame

sagittarius 2H - a focus on the bigger picture rather than being so detail-oriented, expansion of ideals, acceptance, travel opportunites

𝐌𝐂 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓

💸 the 6H and where virgo sits in your MC persona chart can tell of what job you will end up doing

the 6H and virgo both detail service towards others and jobs are often exactly that - providing a service to other people in order to make a living.

aquarius 6H / virgo in 11H - technology, engineering, computer science, activism, humanities

taurus 6H / virgo in 10H - banking and financial services, art collector or curator, fashion designer, makeup artist

gemini 6H / virgo in 3H - teacher, writer, public relations, public affairs

💸 Juno in your MC persona could tell where your future spouse helps you out in your career endeavors

Juno in 5H - in creative spark and inspiration, in enjoying or finding joy in your work

Juno in 1H - in gaining attention, in first impressions people have of you on the job

Juno in 4H - in feeling comfortable and secure in your work, in feeling that your work is what you're meant to do

💸 Asteroids and planets making prominent aspects to Sun in your MC persona can tell more about the job you work or the way you work

💸 Fortuna (19) in the MC persona chart can tell about where you can find luck - good or bad - in your work life

Fortuna in 2H - luck in finances, material possessions, work ethic and values

Fortuna in 5H - luck in creative ideas, enjoyment, influence

Fortuna in 3H - luck in communication, persuasion, teamwork

💸 NN placement in MC persona can what you need to learn to feel comfortable doing in the workforce

NN in 10H - learning to feel comfortable with having a strong reputation and being in the spotlight; learning to feel comfortable around men

NN in 1H - learning to feel comfortable with the way you present yourself to others; learning to feel comfortable with how others view you

NN in 11H - learning to feel comfortable with creating friendships; learning to feel comfortable with being a part of a larger culture

𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐂 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐑𝐒

💵 Edisona (742) making prominent aspects in your chart can indicate someone being an enterpernuer

edison was more of an enterperneur than inventor, as he often marketed inventions others already made, so that's why i prefer this interpretation of the asteroid

💵 those interested in journalism and other writing careers should look for Gemini / 3H prominence in their charts (natal and MC persona)

💵 Ceres making prominent aspects in your chart can indicate somone being interested in cooking

💵 those interested in teaching should look for Sagittarius / 9H / 3H prominence in their charts

💵 those interested in graphic design should look for Earth dominance / degrees / placements in their charts

if you have questions reguarding placements you may have, feel free to send me an ask! i will try to answer what i can!

[lynnerdo]

* The heart is not meant to rule *

Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Atreides!Reader

Tag list: @wo-ming-bai

Slow burn, knife kink, blood kink, strangers to lovers, softer!Feyd-Rautha, CONSENT, 18+, arranged marriage, assassination, poison, murder, etc

Previous Chapter - The Fall Current Chapter - Blood for Blood

***

All you could do right now is wait it out, you thought to yourself. Your situation more dire than you had imagined, what if nothing ever changed on Giedi Prime, and you’d be stuck here for so long that Feyd would find someone else to fulfil his needs and wants. You frowned at the idea because it sounded so stupid in your head but doubt always likes to settle in at the worst of times.

Your thoughts quickly dispersed as you received a message from one of your staff.

“Another letter, my lady”, they spoke softly as they handed you a handwritten note in a sealed envelope.

The both of you had reverted to using an old-fashioned method of communications even if that meant that it would take a longer while. You both had a trusted servant who would make the trip and deliver them. The Baron had no idea of this, and it could not be traced easily. You had been doing this for weeks now, sending letter back and forth, updating each other on what was happening on your planets, reminding each other what you were fighting for.

*

Feyd sat down in his room, ink at the ready, a blank sheet before him. He stared at the empty page, struggling to find the words to convey his feelings.

“Dear Lady Atreides…”

He paused, feeling the inadequacy of his greeting. You, miles away on Caladan, had written him letters full of warmth and longing. Each word you wrote brought him comfort, yet he found himself unable to reciprocate with the same eloquence.

“I hope this letter finds you well. I miss you terribly. The days here are long and lonely without your presence.”

Feyd frowned, scratching out the last sentence. It sounded too formal, too detached. He wanted to tell you how his heart ached in your absence, how your memory haunted his dreams, but the words felt clumsy.

He tried again.

“Your last letter brought me much joy. Your words are like a balm to my soul. I wish I could express myself as beautifully as you do.”

Again, he hesitated. This wasn’t right either. His frustration grew, and he pushed the parchment aside, covering his hand over his face in shame.

“Why is this so difficult?” he mutters to himself.

It was then that he realised: he was a man of actions, not words. His strength lay in what he did, not what he wrote. You knew this about him, appreciated it even. You had always understood his need to show his feelings through deeds rather than letters.

He took a deep breath, a new resolve forming within him. Picking up the quill once more, he began to write.

“My dearest, I have struggled to find the right words to tell you how much you mean to me. Every attempt feels insufficient. So, instead of words, I send you this token of my affection.”

He reached into a small box on his desk and took out a very intricate looking pendant. He had commissioned this a while back but never found the time and place to give it to you. Bearing the crest of House Atreides intertwined with that of House Harkonnen, a symbol of your forbidden yet unbreakable bond.

As he continued writing, the words flowed more easily.

“This pendant represents my promise to you. No matter the distance, no matter the danger, my heart is with you always. I will come to you as soon as I can, to show you what my words cannot express. He will not stand in our way much longer. Yours always, Feyd.”

Sealing the letter with the pendant inside, Feyd felt a sense of relief. He knew that you would understand. He allowed himself a rare smile, thinking about you wearing the pendant as soon as you read the letter, knowing that his love would feel the depth of his emotions.

*

As you finish reading the letter you’re practically cry-laughing. His letter short and direct, but the pendant gorgeously detailed and intricate. The design of it making your heart flutter in all the right ways.

You glance back at the letter and wonder what he meant by those last words about the Baron. It seemed like a threat, and you just hope he won’t do anything stupid.

*

After giving the letter to the trusted servant Feyd goes into the palace again and challenges the Baron to a duel, fully knowing that the Baron never fights his own battles. You would be telling him how stupid this was, and how he broke his promise to not do anything risky while you were gone. But he simply cannot handle this anymore. His hatred for the Baron is overtaking his every thought, and now he finally found the courage to overthrow his abuser.

To Feyd’s surprise the Baron almost immediately agrees to a duel, choosing one of their best assassins as an opponent. Feyd knew something was up but had no idea who to trust. Luckily, Tula had been loyal as ever to the both of you, so she had been able to get intel before the duel.

She told Feyd about how this was not going to be a fair match, since Feyd was their best fighter, so they had arranged the assassin’s blades, so they were coated with poison. Highly illegal, but necessary if the Baron wanted Feyd dead.

“So, all I have to do is not get struck,” Feyd spoke matter of fact. As if it was that simple.

Tula raised her eyebrows at him. Almost in disbelief at how fast he shrugged this deafening information off him.

“My lord na-baron… If you get hit once…”, she didn’t want to finish her sentence, for the looming doom sounded too dark to utter.

He stared at her face for a while, knowing the implications, agreeing that he had to be careful. He felt a moment of weakness, of himself opening up to her.

“If I ever want to see her again…” he spoke while looking away.

Tula felt his persistence and understood how he felt, her own appreciation and love for you convincing her that this was the only option. She had faith in him, knew he would overcome, but feared the other outcome greatly.

*

Feyd Rautha stood in the dimly lit arena, the sand beneath his feet a stark reminder of the deadly encounter ahead. The Baron's chosen champion stepped forward, his eyes gleaming with a murderous intent. Feyd noticed the subtle exchange between the Baron and his fighter—a set of blades, their edges glinting ominously in the light. Feyd’s heart sank. The poison. Tula had been a respectable associate.

The battle began with a flurry of movements, both fighters clashing with ferocity. Feyd's opponent was relentless, his skill evident in every precise strike and parry. Feyd, though equally skilled, found himself pushed to the brink, barely keeping up with the brutal onslaught. Both men kept doing the deadly dance for what felt like ages, often times coming close to striking each other but never quite.

Feyd got distracted by the crowd, definitely cheering him on, but also reminding him of what he would lose should he die. Then, it happened. A sharp, searing pain in his shoulder as the poisoned blade found its mark. Feyd staggered, feeling the venom course through his veins. His vision blurred, and he could hear the Baron's triumphant laughter echoing through the arena.

But Feyd refused to fall. Summoning the last of his strength, he launched a desperate counterattack, his movements fueled by sheer willpower. In a swift, decisive strike, he brought down the Baron's champion, the man crumpling to the ground in a lifeless heap. The arena fell silent, all eyes on Feyd as he stood over his fallen opponent, panting heavily. The Baron, watching from his perch, smiled coldly, confident in his victory despite his fighter's defeat. Feyd should be collapsing any moment now, succumbing to the deadly poison.

But Feyd remained standing. Minutes passed, and he did not fall. The Baron’s smile faltered, confusion and anger replacing his smug confidence. Why was Feyd still alive? The crowd went from a silence to a roaring mass, scream-shouting Feyd’s name, for a new Baron had risen before their eyes.

Feyd met the Baron's gaze, a defiant glint in his eyes. He understood now. The poison was the same as that from the viper on Caladan, the same venom that had nearly claimed his life once before. It felt almost poetic. If he were to write about it, he could make up 30 different ways of how you indirectly saved his life multiple times without realising it.

Realization dawned on the Baron, his face contorting in rage and disbelief. Feyd straightened, a victorious smile playing on his lips. He had not only survived the duel but had exposed the Baron’s treachery and emerged stronger for it.

As the arena erupted in cheers for Feyd, he silently vowed to himself and the reader who had saved him: this was just the beginning. Together, they would face whatever challenges lay ahead, their bond and their combined strength unbreakable.

[verystrxxwberry]

Hi, Alex! How are you doing? I truly hope you're doing alright. I am a Nevra simp and I wanted to do a request for a smutty one shot... which it is placed in human world andd involving a dress. You can do whatever you want with that information, surprise me! And do this if you feel comfortable with the request ofc.

ELDARYA; <<A little bit of fun won’t hurt.>>

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: NSFW, Nevra smut :3, long one shot, Fem!Reader, human world, public sex, unprotected. ↝ 𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: Hi, Irene. I am doing decently, trying to cope with a lot of responsibilities and enjoy my life at the same time. But ayo, everything’s good by now! I hope you enjoy the os. 

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•.

One of the passions Nevra unlocked upon arriving on earth was discovering those wonderful shopping malls so stimulating for product acquisition. You didn't even have time to read the store sign when you already realized that your dear boyfriend's hand was pulling you inside. The most annoying thing of all was that he would spend long minutes wondering whether to choose the plaid shirt or the plain one, whether the blue shirt or the black one. He is so indecisive that it drives you crazy in the wrong way sometimes. Shopping with Nevra means carrying more than five bags, each weighing at least three kilos. The worst part of it all is when you open your bank account and see that you could have spent more than half of two months' salary. That's why shopping with Nevra has become so limited. 

But every once in a while it's good to take a break from life by shopping. Other times you are forced to do so for more important reasons such as a company dinner to which you are committed that same evening. How forgetful of you to think it was next tuesday and it turned out to be today. You urgently asked Nevra to accompany you so he could help you to pick out a dress. After all, his fashion sense was decent when it came to fitting into a certain style.

And you weren’t wrong. The dresses Nevra suggested were so elegant that there were times when they were far from what you were used to seeing on yourself.  When you tried them on, he was silent; you could see that he needed several seconds to think rationally, with his lips slightly parted. His eyes would scan you up and down, but without adding anything. 

You laughed a little. "Hey..." in an attempt to get his attention you saw that it failed, his eyes completely glued to the way the dress marked the figure of your body. "Hey!" you exclaimed this time, snapping him out of his thoughts. "Are you going to give your opinion for once? It's weird seeing you so quiet."

"I doubt you're human." He said directly after clearing his throat, with a certain seriousness on his face. "You must be a Goddess, I'm sure of it." He seemed to be talking to himself by the way his voice came out so deep and low as he spoke.

"What are you saying now?" again you laughed out of his trance, shaking his arm a little. "Does that mean you like it?"

"I love it. I have too many good tastes, I think." A small smile appeared on his face as he stared at you in the mirror. "You have no right to doubt how beautiful you are." He sighed, as he again placed his hands on your waist, slowly moving down to your hips and stretching the fabric a little to smooth it out. But you knew perfectly well that his intention was not entirely to fix the dress.

"What a flirt you are" A small chuckle left your lips, but you couldn't help the heat on your face. Somehow his touch was able to leave your skin burning even if there was fabric involved. "What's the latest suggestion?"

"The latest suggestion..." He repeats, seeming to be on another planet as his hands turned you around so that you found yourself facing your own reflection. You watched as his hands ran down your hips to your stomach, caressing your belly with tingling gentleness. "I suggest you let me enjoy the view for a bit..." He murmurs, and you can definitely discern something hard pressed against one of your buttocks.

"Nevra... what's wrong with you today?" you whisper, trying not to let the heat of his touch spread through your body. You feel his hands caress your lower abdomen.

"Mm, what's wrong? Nothing." He whispers against your ear, putting more pressure with his hips so that you are able to perfectly notice the shape of his erection. "It would be a shame if it wasn't me making you debut your dress..."

You can't help but gasp the moment his lips begin to suck the skin on the back of your neck. His hands dare to caress your thighs above the dress, his dominant hand venturing beyond where the dress reaches to cover. It is then that a ripple of pleasure spreads through your body, causing you to cover your mouth at once so as not to let anyone notice that there is a finger circling your clit.

Nevra enjoys your reaction, smirking as he spreads kisses along your neck and finally shoulders. His middle finger circles your clit, with just enough pressure and speed to make you vulnerable. Not only that, but he slowly grinds his erection against the contours of your ass. The burning forming in your lower abdomen steadily moves down to the area Nevra is trying to access, making his stimulation of your clit more agile thanks to your own juices.

"Ah... I haven't just started and you're already this wet?" He whispers teasingly, as his tongue runs over the sweat generated on your skin by your nerves. "How cute..."

"Fuck..I can't help it." You whimper as low as you can, praying that the music in the store is loud enough so that no one nearby can hear your gasps. "Nevra, for God's sake... I'm going to kill you..." You growl, frustrated at the uncontainable desire to end up fucking in the fitting room of a clothing store.

"How kind..." He chuckles, increasing the speed and pressure of his fingers on your clit a little. "Say it again...?" The bastard knows what he's doing and takes advantage of it. The adrenaline gets the better of you and you can do nothing but respond with a soft moan. You open your lips to respond, but immediately have to bite your lip to avoid drawing attention to yourself.

"S-sometimes... I… ah- hate you." With your trembling voice you try to speak but it causes Nevra, who uses his other hand to lift your dress slightly from behind,  to laugh at your attempt.

"Oh, you hate me soooo much." The hand that rubbed your clit so devotedly lands on your back and helps you bend forward, making you rest your hands on the mirror so as not to lose your balance. Through the mirror you meet your reflection and the vision of Nevra's face, who is looking back at you with a mischievous grin. His eyes roam over your body and the reflection of your face, you can see he is having fun. Those grayish eyes were devouring you, and you could feel shivers through the areas he admired. So distracted were you with his gaze that the only thing that brought you out of your thoughts was the sound of him unzipping his pants. "A little bit of fun won't hurt..."

And it wasn't until seconds later that your panties were moved in a slow, torturous motion down to your knees. Each time your heartbeat got louder and faster, the adrenaline of doing this in public only increased the arousal.

You closed your eyes, unable to think of anything coherent. You were overcome with desire and it was clear to you that you needed him at that moment. Nevra rubbed the head of his cock against your entrance, enjoying the wetness emerging from inside. "Oh my god, baby..." He sighs, biting his bottom lip. "Last chance to back out?" he whispers.

You can't lie to him. Not when you're so wet that lust controls your desires.

"Fuck, no, go on.. But if you tear the dress..."

"I buy a new one." He said with some assurance, leaning down and planting a kiss on your head. "Thank you." He whispers and then slowly pushes inside you, feeling your walls embrace his cock in such a delicious way that it stole a grunt from him. His hands gripped possessively against your hips, and it didn't take you long to adjust to his size; your pussy had more than assimilated how Nevra felt. But every time he entered you it felt like the most pleasurable and delicious sensation in the world. You closed your eyes in pleasure, letting your head fall back as you gasped. "Open your eyes." You hear him say, as he grabs your chin and guides your head towards the mirror. His thrusts, slow but precise, burying his cock deeper and deeper inside you, do nothing to help you keep your eyes slightly open. "See? You're beautiful..." He growls in a husky tone.

Shit, you wanted to scream. It was an inopportune time to make you feel so good.

Every time you wanted to close your eyes, his fingers squeezed your hips or your chin as he picked up speed slightly. Nevra's shaky breathing was certainly pleasant to listen to, and yet the hustle and bustle of people outside the dressing room was enough to cover it.

"Ah... yes, faster..." you whimpered, and it didn't take him long to fulfill your request. Nevra was grateful for how horny you were, it was so easy to slide inside you. His hands gripped you so firmly that it was impossible for you to move. And it wasn't until he touched your weak spot that you had to cover your mouth from the moan that escaped your lips. At this, Nevra let out a playful chuckle and precise his thrusts to hit that spot again and again. 

"Does that feel good?" He knew the answer, but he loved hearing you when you were in this state.

"Yes, yes... too good..." You mumbled, trying not to let your voice break from your boyfriend's actions. Fuck, the burning in your lower abdomen was getting more and more intense. Nevra was also focused on how good it felt, totally unfocused on his surroundings. You were both having a hard time not moaning how much you would like to.

You couldn't help but moan again when he muted his sounds by nipping at your neck. You could feel your own walls throbbing as he took you with more desperation. Until finally you let go and reached your orgasm, and seconds later Nevra pressed his hips harder than before, going as deep as he could so he could fill you with his own seed. You felt completely full, besides feeling your thighs weak and trembling from the intensity.

Your heaving breaths come together as he leans down to give you a messy kiss of affection to your lips, sighing and finally pulling out of you. Through the mirror you saw that he had an amused smile on his face.

"What makes you so happy?" you sigh, grabbing a piece of paper from your bag to clean yourself, even though it embarrassed you at that moment.

"You." He said, he was also wiping himself and finally helping you to stand upright. He was aware that your legs were shaky enough to not allow you to walk very normally. "And the fact that I've been the first to debut your dress and not your corporate dinner party." He admitted with a confidence that made you laugh.

"See you're a little silly sometimes...you're lucky I love you." 

"Too lucky." Laughed he this time. You couldn't do much more though as you heard a couple of knocks on your fitting room door.

"Miss, you've been there for half an hour, are you all right?" a shop assistant spoke up, making it clear to you that it was time to go.

The look on the shop assistant’s face when she saw that you hadn't been alone was judgmental. But at least you had your dress for the dinner and both you and Nevra had enjoyed a moment together.

✩; remember to reblog and like to support my content, I hope you enjoyed it!

[panged-lin]

This is gonna be another long one, bare in mind.

Part of me always wondered why Providence wanted the Survivor to not escape the planet. The biggest threat the Contact Light posed was the teleporters on-board - just take those out of the ship and let them pass.

But then I remembered that Providence is no stranger to keeping violent creatures bound to Petrichor V when they could otherwise leave when they want to. From the Black/Portal Imp log:

Unlike the other fauna on this planet, the black imp is aggressive to all other species. Is the imp also stranded here?

And its log fron RoR2:

Worst of all, attempts to return through the portal have been unsuccessful in our weakened state. It takes considerable effort to enter [the between space] - and we lack the strength to stay there long enough to cross the membrane. We are stranded. And then there is the master of this world. Curiously, it is in his presence that we find ourselves most weakened - and when he senses us, he wastes no time in his approach.

The Imp's ability to cross the planes is weakened on Petrichor V, especially when close to Providence. In Risk of Rain and Returns they and the Overlord straight-up die in gory fashion when they're health is depleted, but in Risk of Rain 2 (where Providence is dead) they seem to be sent back to the Red Plane before they can die, their strength no longer as limited by the Bulwark of the Weak's influence.

Providence is hostile to both the Survivor and the Imps but keeps them there by defending the items they need to escape the planet (Contact Light for the Survivor and access to a portal for the Imps, possibly the Artifact of Origin which you get for beating him with a combination of other Artifacts).

It's notable that both of these stranded creatures have access to some kind of warping ability, be it the teleporters or shifting between planes of existance. Teleportation in particular is heavily coveted by Providence and his brother Mithrix, being the only way they can extend their power to beyond Petrichor V.

Something still doesn't add up, though. The Imps I can understand since Providence's possession of their artifact seems to be what's keeping them under. But the Survivor arguably wouldn't have posed a threat if the teleporters were simply removed from the Contact Light and they were allowed to go on their way. I get why he crashed the ship - it was to bring the teleporters back to the planet - but after that point they don't need to stay on the ship. If they couldn't be moved they likely wouldn't be in there to begin with.

Another idea then; did Providence keep these creatures on Petrichor V because of his love of soul? He consistently indifferent about his legendary status amongst the creatures he saves. The only times we've heard of him interacting with or reaching out to his subjects is to cleanse Mithrix's infulence from them - by deadly force in the case of the Beads of Fealty. While they flourish on Petrichor V, Providence never lets them return to their homes or find a new one to regain what they've lost. His choice of creatures to save run the gambit of intelligent almost-human lizard folk, a people fallen to a parasitic Tar (complete with a desert landscape flowing with Tar littered with giant snake (Worm?) skeletons), and even Scavengers who could threaten to rise to the same level of power as the Survivors through their kleptomanic impulses. It's an aclectic mess that - as proven by the Imps - can still include those firmly against Providence's divine rule.

Providence loves soul. He constructed Aurelionite with an excess of it, exhausting himself in the process. He traps Mithrix on the moon out of fear that he was going down a violent path that could destroy the soul-filled creatures he concerned himself with. He has a fondness for worms, which are perhaps the largest creatures on Petrichor V including his own personal Gilded Wurms. Did he keep the Imps and the Survivor from leaving peacefully because they too contained soul? He was certainly interested in keeping humanity on Petrichor V if given the chance as with the Commencement log:

I know the planet you trail – of water and dirt. You fear their stability. That they will consume themselves.

He's a curious one, that much is certain.

At the same time, a peaceful confrontation might not have been on the table with Providence being the one to kill almost all the crew aboard Contact Light to begin with. The creatures on Petrichor V may have recognised that whatever Providence knocked down was a threat to their way of life and moved to attack outside his influence, pushing the Survivor to horrendous means to... survive, the experiences on the way to Providence molding them into a threat that he could not allow to persist lest they kill more soulful beings. And that's likely the solution to the puzzle; a chain of events that led to neither side having an option but to kill the other due to decisions made independant of - albiet influenced by - the other. Providence forcing them to find a means of escape, the creatures thinking they were under threat by something that caused their god to turn his head, the Survivor going to grisly means to leave as a result.

That answer would gel with the running thread of Risk of Rain; flawed people making decisions based on what they see, with those decisions trickling down and creating horrific consequences as a result. Providence's own reluctance to explain himself is one of his biggest flaws and what ultimately led to the downfall of himself, his brother, and the planet as a whole. All because he felt the need to go to dire lengths to prevent harm. Those means would create the very circumstances for the ones hes stifling to seek the same great, often terrible power Providence himself holds in order to exact their own wants more brutally than he could manage. I'm not entirely sure if Providence even knew the Survivor was alive on the planet until they were on - or close to - the Contact Light. With this idea in mind it's hard to believe he kept them there on purpose. He's powerful, sure, but not omnipotent or omnipresent.

Oh right, the Imps. They might honestly be another creature Providence saught to keep and had to deal with the consequences. Or he saw them as a threat to soul and aimed to prevent them from crossing into our plane, from butchering any life they encountered, and picking off the ones that were on Petrichor V when this occured. His relationship with them is very different from other creatures - even compared to the similarly hostile Void which he completely held back to the point they aren't even seen until RoR2 (because they weren't written at that point nor retroactively introduced in Returns). I'm kinda sad we didn't get any further expansion on them like we did with the Void. Ah well.

[esha-isboogara]

what your favorite jojo character says about you !

these are my takes on what kind of person you are based on your fave ;)

jonathan- you’re way too good for this world and i will protect you with my life!! you always choose the “nice” option when you’re playing an rpg/otome. i bet you cry during movies. you’re a dog person but you’re not annoying about it.

speedwagon- you’re either the kind of person that has a waifu unironicly or you’re too afraid to disagree with other peoples opinions. you were for sure bullied in school for liking anime and never really recovered .

joseph- you think you’re the funniest person in the room but in reality have the sense of humor of a middle school boy and everyone thinks you’re annoying. you have no idea how to act in public

ceaser- you most definitely get bitches.

jotaro- you’re either too horny for your own good or youre the kind of person who automatically chooses the most basic mc because it’s the safest. you probably never outgrew your emo phase and i guarantee you read lots of hardcore smut in middle school.

kakyoin- you use the word milfs way too much. it’s actually kind of annoying. please shut up. on the other hand you know how to dress!! for some reason every single kak stan knows their way around fashion. your probably an avid markiplier enjoyer.

avdol- you had a crush on zuko in middle school and i bet you carry a lighter everywhere. you don’t smoke or anything you just carry it to carry it. you’re like super mature for some reason and you are the brains of the friend group most likely.

polnareff- you’re a bit dense but we love you anyways. you have zero clue how to express your emotions. please stop letting people trauma dump on you :( you don’t deserve it babe

iggy- shut THE FUCK up

josuke- you are the coolest person on earth. you have no flaws. you are a god.

okuyasu- you’re the dumb friend. i’m sorry to tell you like this but someone had to. you make up for your lack of brain cells with your big heart <3 i bet you know lots of random facts about uselessness things as well.

rohan- you’re the biggest bitch i have ever met/pos. you definitely had a devianart phase that you only outgrew because you got bullied or met some scary ass people on there. you’re kind of a weirdo but that’s what gives you your spice.

koichi- you act innocent and kind but you’re a bitch too/ also pos. i bet your AO3 history is full of insane amount of hard smut or hurt/bo comfort.

giorno-you’re either a dope ass person who’s actually super genuine and everyone wants to be your friend. OR you’re a super annoying anime fan who says shit like “but can he beat goku though”.

mista- you’re a stoner. i have not met a single fan of this man who does not smoke. you either smoke before every little thing you do and mention it to every single person on this planet. or you’re down low about it and just kind of go about your life.

narancia- you are still a child. you didn’t really mature correctly and i bet it’s because of some traumatic event that happened during childhood that forced you to grow up. please go to therapy i will be your therapist. also liking sharp things and setting things on fire is not a personality trait.

fugo- you’re a red flag but in a good way(?)you always try to see the best in people even when it’s clear they are the worst person on earth. you definitely have anger issues because you suppress your feelings until they explode out of you. you give really good hugs i think.

abbacchio- you either want a big titty goth gf or are the big titty goth gf. you never left your emo phase and you definitely had a behavior problem in high school. please stop dying your hair every month it’s going to fall out soon.

bruno- you’re most DEFINITELY the mom of the friend group. everyone comes to you with their issues but you’re too afraid to put your issues on someone else because you don’t want to burden them with your feelings.

jolyne- you are most DEFINITELY lgbqt emphasis on the L. you most definitely have issues with one or both of your parents.

hermes- COME OUT OF THE CLOSER PLS!!! we all already know you like girls just admit it we are going to love and accept you no matter what.

foo fighters-autism

[kings0kc]

@dcsuperherogirls This is going to be a long post! There will also be some extra characters I’ll name at the end if you want to know about them to! There’s so much info I have to make a part 2😭

PART 1

Wonder Woman: Her name is Diana Prince! 17

Favorite food is Sugary cereals

Her fashion sense is athletic and practical

She is the third hero we see to have won hero of the month!

Supergirl: 15

Her favorite food is Superfood cake!

Her fashion sense is Peppy and Preppy!

She is extremely clumsy

She is the second hero we see to win hero of the month!

Her favorite band is called “Opposite Direction”

Batgirl: she/her 16

She knows martial arts

Her favorite food is also superfood cake!

Her fashion sense is Sleek,dark,practical and tech-y

She is the ninth hero we see to win hero of the month!

Harley Quinn: she/her. 15

Her favorite food is kaboom candy cupcakes!

Her fashion sense is colorful and wacky

Harley captures her classmates best and worst moments on her web channel ‘Harley’s Quintessentials’

She is the 8th hero we see win hero of the month!

Bumblebee: she/her 15

She is from metropolis!

Her favorite food is honey flavored anything

Her fashion sense is stylish with a hint of tech

We don’t see her win hero of the month BUT we do see her win hero of the year!

Poison Ivy: She/her 15

Her favorite food is bacon and eggs

Her fashion sense is green and earthy

According to the wiki it is possible that her and Harley are romantically linked it is also implied in “ha ha horticulture” that like her other incarnations Harley is possibly immune to her poisons

She is the 5th hero we see to win hero of the month!

Katana: she/her 16 and a half

Her favorite food is Chopped salad

Her fashion sense is cutting edge couture

She has an unnamed younger brother

She has a pet fox named kitsune

She is the 10th hero we see to win her of the month!

Cheetah: she/her

She is interesting, she has scribbled out so information but I can still see it👀

She is from Notting hamshire, England

Her specialty is Quick strikes and Let

Her favorite foods are Lamb Kebabs

Her fashion sense is Athletic and amazing

(There are so many more characters they might need a whole new post so here’s the characters I did not mention!

Cat women,hawk girl,star sapphire,beast boy,flash,green lantern,thunder and lighting,Adam strange,animal man,arrowette,big barda,cyborg,elasti-girl,el Diablo,frost,lady shiva, miss Martian,ravager,Shazam,silver banshee, Starfire,vibe AND all the staff)

THE THREE POWS OF SHH

Brain POWer

Super POWer

Will POWer

The classes are!: Weaponomics,history,science,physical Education,Super suit design

(Ah yes that’s all they need🤨)

SUPERLATIVES:

Most likely to save the day: Wonder Woman and bumble bee

Best Student ID picture Poison Ivy

^^ the worst: the flash

Best weapons wielder: hawk girl

Worlds best team: Supergirl and Batgirl

Best supersuit: Bumblebee

Most dynamic duo: Harley Quinn and Wondy

Bluntest Bludgeon: Big Barda and her mega rod

Sweetest smile: Starfire

Most disciplined: Lady Shive

Handsomest hero: Green Lantern

Most flexible: Elasti-girl

Most Dramatic: Star Sapphire

Most animal Magnetism: Beast Boy

Best class clown: Harley Quinn

Most likely to create mischief: Catwomen

Most Ferociously Fashionable: Cheetah

Neatest Room: Bumblebee

Messiest room: Harley Quinn

Coolest cave: Batgirl

Room that only star sapphire could love: Star Sapphire

SCHOOL CLUBS:

Junior Detective Society of Metroplis

current members: Batgirl,hawkgirl,Flash,Bumblebee

Vehicles Club

Current members: Batgirl,Harley Quinn,Supergirl, wonder women (just there whole dorm huh😭)

Science Club

Current members: Ivy, frost, star sapphire, lightning, green lantern

MODEL UP (united planets)

represent your planet at Model Up!

Current members, wonder women, supergirl, miss Martian, Starfire, Adam strange, big barda

Track Team

Current members: Wonder Woman, supergirl,flash,animal man,cheetah

Glee Club

Current members: miss Martian,silver banshee,bumblebee

School internet radio station

Current members: Bumblebee (night DJ)

Star Sapphire (relationship advice guru)

Harley Quinn (sanity checks)

Band Club

Current members: Katana,Beast boy, silver banshee, cheetah

CHESS (citizens helping extraterrestrials succeed society)

Current CHESS buddies: Batgirl and Supergirl, Bumblebee and Miss Martian, Lady Shiva and Big Barda, Wonder Woman and Starfire

[rei-ismyname]

The Phoenix/Phoenix Force sucks

If you're not familiar with Marvel/X-Men's The Phoenix catching you up on the full context is not really possible. I'll summarise the salient bits, but I definitely recommend checking out The Phoenix and Dark Phoenix sagas in Chris Claremont's Uncanny X-Men. The big dumb Firebird has appeared earlier in the timeline for better or worse, but that's the definitive phoenix story (and very entertaining.)

An abridged Publication History of the Phoenix

- The Phoenix is introduced as a cosmic abstraction, a vital entity that is part of the universe. Jean Grey is sacrificing herself to save the rest of the X-Men and this happens.

And this.

It's wild shit, totally iconic and mostly internally coherent, though it doesn't end well. Jean as the Phoenix eats a star and destroys a planet of broccoli people. A very effective use of girl power. A lot happens and she ends up sacrificing herself again. It was established that Jean is The Phoenix, now and forever.

- Rachel Grey, Jean and Scott's daughter from an alternate timeline shows up and is a phoenix host for years without any genocides or whatnot. There's angst, but it's just a part of her. Rachel was a bit of a Jean expy at times but it still made sense and was exciting. She's Jean's daughter so it doesn't take too much handwaving to accept her as a 'host.' (She still is btw, no idea how this works but I like her.)

- Over the next few decades the Phoenix showed up an awful lot. Avengers Vs X-Men is probably the most well known instance. The bird is a lot less picky about hosts now. Hope Summers is the intended host (another Jean expy at times,) but due to Tony Stark's arrogance the phoenix ends up in five other people - Namor, Emma Frost, Scott Summers, Magik and Colossus. It makes very little sense tbh, but after much needless conflict it ends up in Hope and she uses it for some cosmic magnificence.

- Over the next few decades it's all over the place. The Stepford Cuckoos, Quentin Quire, tean Jean, this Shi'Ar dude with a big sword, a prehistoric woman called Firehair, this utter dipshit called Faithful John, and others. It's become a problem of the week, deus ex machina, and worst of all - the stories are not very good. The lore of the phoenix is nonsensical at this point but Marvel was not showing any restraint. Personally, I'd groan whenever it appeared because it meant repetitive plot points and further muddying of how the thing works.

- The Avengers got hold of it and the less said about it the better. It's the mid 2010s and this supposedly unknowable universal abstraction, a god of sorts, has become frankly silly (derogatory.) The wonder has been strangled through overuse and conflicting lore. I'm actually understating it a bit - if you don't believe me check out the wiki for The Phoenix. This cosmic abstraction, one of the most iconic X-Men concepts/moments/arcs had become cringe and boring through overuse and lack of imagination.

- In 2019 Jonathan Hickman's House of X dropped and it was a great time to be an X-Men fan - the Krakoan age. A decade plus of deeply average stories and nostalgia bait were in the past and the status quo had changed in wonderful ways. The Phoenix received a mention on a data page, but it was in a list of powerful entities to give context to a new and interesting concept. At the time it wasn't necessarily foreshadowing.

- In 2023 Marvel was (unwisely IMO) speed running an end to Krakoa and the aforementioned concept emerged as the endgame threat. The Phoenix found its way into the story in an organic fashion and the X-Men put all their hopes in The Phoenix to defeat the threat. Kieron Gillen, under difficult circumstances and with less time than promised, actually did it! He used the Phoenix in a quality story with appropriate gravitas and wonder - and he cleaned up the lore so it made sense again. That run (and era) ended in a better place than most of us imagined it could. It didn't surprise me because Gillen is the best writer in comics today IMO, but we got lucky. He left it on a high note but Kieron Gillen is not at Marvel anymore and Tom Brevoort is in charge of X Books. I'll come back to this polycule erasing bozo.

Phoenix (2024) picks up where he left Jean and The Phoenix (and some infinity comics but let's ignore those for now) - both lore and characterisation-wise. It's explicitly solicited as a cosmic run and the first issue has delivered on that. It's not hard to imagine an ending with The Phoenix seeing itself out of the story in an entertaining way with clean lore and sense of wonder intact. Hopefully without killing Jean again 😅.

Ideally, Marvel will have the good sense to leave it alone for a few years at least. The books are already milking nostalgia and historically X-Men keep returning to the Phoenix, Apocalypse, and some new hate group/the US government deciding genocide is on the menu again. Apocalypse has had character growth (and if they ever undo that I'm doing violence) and moved on & we've just had an attempted genocide plus past victims resurrected - so I'll be generous and say they're off the table. The X line has all new writers and seems to be looking to synergise with '97 and the MCU while claiming they're going for fresh and exciting.

We might get lucky again. X-Men 97 is way past the OG Phoenix stuff and so far has avoided using bottom of the barrel storylines from that time. The 2000s contains danger, but most instances don't fit the 'greatest hits' style they've used so far. An exception to that could be Avengers vs X-Men, but I think they'd save that for a summer blockbuster if anything. I suspect a lot of people would get hype about a movie called AVX, especially if they never read the comic. The MCU hasn't been shy about reconceptualizing events for movies, like Civil War, for instance. The essence of the premise was there but the film made a lot more sense. There's plenty of other reasons (better ones even, ones that don't feel OOC and forced) for the X-Men and avengers to fight, and they'd have to set it up with Disassembled (kinda already happened, not Wanda's fault,) House of M (please no) and then all the Hope Summers/Messiah events. The Fox Movies already did the Phoenix, too, bad as it was. I don't think they'll go that way.

Secret Wars has a phoenix egg in the comics, but it's not important and it's barely an X-Men story. I don't see The Phoenix menacing our screens anytime soon, thankfully. What I fear most is editorial playing it safe and/or nostalgic (which is why Tom Brevoort concerns me - check out his Spider-Man manifesto and you'll see what I mean) and a writer returning to the well when pitching story ideas. Everyone is confident at the start of a new era bc it takes a while to internalise that Marvel repackages and reskins the same 25 tropes while deliberately presenting the 'Illusion of change.' Once the initial ideas dry up and it's crunch time it's natural to look to the past for ideas and characters to reuse. Maybe sales dip a little, or the comics are in a holding pattern waiting for the MCU to do something. Whatever the cause, it will get pitched again and Brevoort will likely say yes. I don't want to be unfair to the guy, but he's been failing upwards for years.

After all, it's happened so many times already. Metatextually, The Phoenix is a symbol of rebirth. That would be a good thing. It can be easy to mistake repetition for rebirth, but it's the avatar of life and creativity. In universe one of its roles is to destroy stagnant ideas or species. Anything that's static and has stopped evolving. Ironically it's been used in some of the worst instances of creative stagnation in Marvel comics. The Phoenix, recent goodness aside, sucks.

I genuinely hope I'm an old 'man' shaking my fist at a cloud while telling Tom Brevoort to get off my lawn. I love being wrong. Nothing would make me happier than Spider-Man or Magneto hosting the Phoenix being an Impossibility. I know I'm not the target demographic but I don't just hope these things for myself. We all deserve good stories, new ideas, the joy of being vulnerable enough to get invested in escapist media. The Mouse, like all capitalists, does not give a fuck about those things though unfortunately. They care about profit. Eh, there's always Fan Fiction. If it does happen I'll commit to a million words. 💜

Don't even think about it.

[btr-rewatch]

Big Time Rush Season 1, Episode 11: “Big Time Jobs”

I remember this one being one of my favorite episodes. Excited to rewatch it!

Highlights: The boys set out to make some dough. Also: Mirror Realm Alter Egos, the worst sign-spinners on the planet, and sentient coffee makers.

We begin with the guys preparing for the "Palm Woods 500 Invitational All-Terrain Decathlon Classic." The first one to run around the building and ring the bell at the front desk wins a large homemade trophy made of boxes covered with shiny wrapping paper with a colander on top. Very fancy.

Also, Kendall doesn't pronounce "decathlon" correctly. He says "discathlon," which, as far as I've been able to tell from briefly looking it up, isn't a real word. I mean, it's something you could chalk up to in-universe as a term the boys made up on their own, but this is probably just Kendall Schmidt flubbing the line.

The race goes about as well as you'd expect.

Carlos is declared the winner!

An enraged Bitters then tells the boys that they have to pay for all the damage they've caused, which amounts to $2,000 (and 30¢). Gustavo is NOT happy that his dogs have gotten themselves into so much trouble. He's sick of them breaking things, which leads us into a montage of some of the things around the studio they've broken in the last several months. Shout out to my favorite part of the montage:

Because like...why. Why is James singing a taunting song about having a smoothie? Why does this make Kendall so upset that he feels the need to smack it straight outta James's hand? There's missing context here. James and Kendall were definitely just not getting along that day, and this was the final straw.

Anyway, Gustavo tells them that they have to pay him his $2,000 back, and until they do, they're not allowed in the Palm Woods pool. In order to come up with $500 each, they're going to need to get jobs. This is horrifying news to our boys.

Carlos gets stuck being Gustavo's production assistant, and James Kendall, and Logan return to the Palm Woods to do some job searching. After reading through a listing of horrible jobs, Kendall and Logan set out to become sign spinners, and James finds an ad for "the new face of Cuda." Obviously, he thinks this is the perfect job for him.

This leads into that bizarre but delightful scene where he talks to himself in the mirror, but it's like...some sort of alter-ego with a slightly deeper voice??

Mirror James: "Look at yourself! Who's handsomer than you?"

James: "No one!"

Mirror James: "Who's got more style than you?"

James: "No one!"

Mirror James: "Who's smarter than you?"

James: "Well, lots of people. But that has nothing to do with being a model."

I mean...he's right. What a himbo. Katie appoints herself as James's manager, and the two of them set out to take the fashion world by storm.

Meanwhile, at Kendall and Logan's sign-spinning job:

Yeah, they get fired pretty quickly. Also, can I point out that one of my first thoughts upon watching the above moment was how close they came to possibly being hit by cars?? If either one of them had fallen to the street instead, they would have died. And it would have been in the stupidest way possible. Cause of death? SIGN SPINNING.

And we're not even too far into this episode yet, but I'm enjoying this Kendall and Logan storyline. I don't think there have been many moments thus far in the series where it's just been the two of them paired up ("Big Time Crib" is the only one that comes to mind), and I like seeing them teamed up for some shenanigans. I've always had a soft spot for the Kendall and Logan dynamic, especially when it comes to Kendall's ability to help Logan let loose. I feel like...Logan feels the most secure with Kendall? Which makes sense because Kendall is the leader, but still. It's nice to see Logan come out of his shell a bit, and seeing him act all goofy and over the top with Kendall as they (horribly) spin those signs is one of those moments.

Onto Carlos's story! He's been told to get a coffee for Gustavo, and can I just say how much I love the "Carlos does battle with a coffee maker" plot? This boy is given such a simple task: get coffee, and this machine proceeds to make his life miserable for the rest of the episode.

I'm not sure how many people currently in the fandom were also on Tumblr back when the series was on, but there was this popular BTR blog that consisted of posting beautiful, aesthetic pictures with ridiculous quotes from the show on them. That was the whole blog, and the fandom loved it. There are two specific ones I remember, and I've recreated them here so those who didn't get the original experience can see what I'm talking about.

The BTR fandom sure was something. Wish I could remember what the blog was called (though I'm not sure it'd even still be up).

While Carlos fights for his life at Rocque Records, Kendall and Logan return to 2J to try to find new jobs. After reading off a series of ridiculous options, Kendall has his own idea

Before Kendall can drag Logan off to the nearest hospital to have their kidney's extracted, there's a knock at the door. A woman has come to ask if Mrs. Knight is home and can watch her son, and Kendall agrees to do it (she'll pay them $20 an hour). This gives the guys the idea to offer a babysitting service in order to earn the money they need. They quickly have lots of eager parents lined up to take advantage of their convenient service.

Over at James's modeling job, he quickly realizes that he ain't the only pretty face in town.

They have a brief "face-off," but James is no match for all the handsome in the room, and he just like. Passes out.

Over at Kendall and Logan Babysitting Services Incorporated, things quickly fall apart. Unable to handle the energy of eight kids, Kendall and Logan end up tied to chairs. Mama Knight comes to rescue them, but she quickly flees the premises after.

We return to Carlos for a moment to check on how he's doing, which is Not Well. The room is being filled with foam, and unplugging the coffee maker does nothing since it has a "reserve power" mode. Carlos also causes it to activate its "self-defense" mode when he smacks it several times.

Down at the Palm Woods lobby, a depressed James is sipping a smoothie. He sadly tells Katie, "In Minnesota, I was 'The Face.' Now, I'm just 'A Face.' I'm just a handsome grain of sand on an extremely beautiful beach."

Yeah, so he's doing great.

Meanwhile, Kendall and Logan are having a day

They decide to put the kids' energy to good use and have them run a car-washing service while they sit back and collect the money.

Back at Rocque Records, (wow, this episode is busy) Kelly discovers the catastrophe unfolding in the break room and freaks out. When Carlos says they have to destroy the machine, she protests. That is, until things get personal.

"Kelly is dumb. Women are weak," the coffee machine says (it also calls her "cupcake"), to which she and Carlos promptly charge into the room to attack it with a bat and microphone stand. Together, they defeat C.A.L.

Katie gets James another modeling gig for Cuda—an elbow model for chapped elbow cream. James is not happy. He angrily model-walks away.

However, he's stopped in his tracks by none other than Mirror James, who tells him to embrace the job and his beautiful elbow so they can get back to the pool. James agrees and returns to the photoshoot.

I cannot get over the Mirror James stuff. Does this happen in any other episodes?? I can't remember. What is WRONG with him?

We then go to wrap up the babysitting plot. All the parents come to pick up their kids while Kendall and Logan happily take the payment owed them after a day of such suffering.

And with that, the guys have earned all the money needed to pay Gustavo back! It took them less than a day, lol. But they only have a few seconds to celebrate before an angry mob descends upon them demanding pay for all the additional chaos caused in their money-making attempts. Among the charges are a fine from the city for running an illegal daycare, destroying that coffee maker (an $8,000 prototype), and the cost of James's wardrobe from his modeling gig. So, when all is said and done, they've paid Gustavo back the $2,000.30, but now they owe him $14,089.

Gustavo flips his lid, starts destroying things around the studio, and gets caught by Griffin, who tells Gustavo he has to pay him back all that money. We end the episode with Kelly, Gustavo, and the guys all running a car wash at the Palm Woods.

There's so much to love about this episode. Disaster follows these boys wherever they go. They cannot have a normal day if they tried.

[cityandking]

spark enough to last the winter

branwen + star wars au. 2.6k for hypothermia prompted by @forcekenobi. sabine and middy belong to @snapdragonling. set loosely after this meeting. // angst prompts

Of all the ways to go, it wasn’t the one Branwen would have bet on—though stupidly, on an uninhabited world should probably have been somewhere on the list, given the sort of shit they got into these days. It wasn’t even the worst way to go, objectively speaking. It was only a little inelegant for her taste. She’d have been irate about it if she’d had the energy to spare, but irritation fueled no fires and didn’t help much with the snow or the wet or the smoldering crash pod she’d left three klicks back, dug into the icy crust of one of the planet’s massive oceans.

The cliffs hadn’t looked that far from back there, when it had been the choice between waiting for the pod to sink through the thick sheet of frozen whitecaps to the waters below or find some modicum of shelter among the rocks. Now, three klicks closer to shore, she’d realized that was because the cliffside was so fucking huge that her sense of scale had simply given it up as a bad job and fucked off, much like her rations pouch and the handy little emergency transponder she’d lost down the trough of one of the massive frozen waves.

At least she'd had the good sense to turn it on before it had gone fumbling from her numb hands. Not that it would do much good. Things had fallen apart in a spectacular fashion back on Abregado—as they often tended to do when one mixed good honest business practice with the tight squeeze of Core corruption—and they’d been forced to split and reconvene. Which was fine; the backup plan to get to Eriadu had been straightforward enough, except that the Luckrunner was with Sabine, and Enikö was somewhere in the bowels of the spaceport, and Bran’s clever ploy to hitch a ride with a crew of Barabelian longhaul shippers running the Rimma Trade Route had hit a snag when one of them found her napping in the cargo hold. It was thoughtful of them to have provided an escape pod, of course, and she’d been sure to tell them so after letting loose their cargo of live Gedonian ground weevils and fighting her way through the mess to commandeer the pod on their behalf.

So really, it was her own damn fault she’d ended up on some ice encrusted backwater halfway out of the Mid-Rim, a few hours and a prayer away from freezing to death.

"Suppose you'll say 'I told you so,'" she said to no one, or thought she said anyhow. Her lips were numb and her face stiff, and it was impossible to hear herself think over the howling gale, much less speak. And there wasn't going to be anyone around to say I told you so anyway, because of the uninhabited frozen tundra planet situation.

Staring death in the face was, as it turned out, a fairly bleak and lonely exercise.

She couldn't say how long it was before she reached the cliffs, only that she knew she had to make it, and so she did. Her feet were leaden in her shoes by then, and her hair had soaked through with snow and frozen again, so that it made a sort of ticking, tapping sound when the locks swung together. She'd even worked up something of a sweat, more than a little overheated in the standard-issue emergency parka she'd found under the jumpseat, and the only thing that kept her from taking it off was a sour, spiky voice in the back of her head that sounded remarkably like Sabine, muttering, Don't be an idiot.

"I'm hardly the idiot," Branwen retorted, struggling to catch her breath. The wind howled even worse here, butting up against the rocks and looping back on itself, but there was bare stone too, and when she squinted she could just see a ledge at about the height of her head, sheltered from the worst of it. As good a place to collapse as any.

Sure, snorted the Sabine-voice. That's why you left the nice cozy crash pod to walk across half an ocean.

"I did not. There was the thing, you know, with the." She waved a hand, then thought better of it when her grip slipped a little on the stone wall and she nearly went tumbling down again. Instead she wedged a foot in further and heaved, forcing herself up over the lip of the ledge to sprawl onto her back.

With the what?

"What? Oh. I don't recall." Just breathing hurt, though she couldn't say if that was from the landing or the cold. Pins and needles inside her lungs, throat aching. Cold, probably; she didn't think anything was broken. She blinked up at the cliff, the massive unending spur of craggy, wind-washed rock. It wavered a little above her, and she flinched automatically, but nothing fell, not even a stone.

Don't just lie there, said the Sabine-voice, peevish. You dragged yourself all the way up here, at least use the shelter.

"You've really got a way with words, love." Still, it took her another handful of heartbeats to shiver herself upright and tuck into the crevice she'd been aiming for. With her back to the stone and her knees draw up tight, the wind wasn't nearly so bad. Her head fell back against the cliffside, heavy, and it probably ought to have hurt a bit but she didn't feel much of anything besides the chill.

Well done, said the Sabine-voice. Now what?

What an excellent question. "Can't say."

Excellent plan.

"I don't see you offering suggestions."

Not nodding off, maybe.

Oh. Branwen blinked her eyes open with a mild sort of surprise. She had been a bit dozy, hadn't she? Bad idea, that; she remembered that much from her Academy training. For a moment she fumbled to pinch herself, but she couldn't feel her fingers nor her arm through the layers of cold and standard-issue parka, so that was a bit of a nonstarter. She peered out at the frozen ocean instead.

At least it wasn't storming, not really. The wind was horrible, of course, and the clouds were low and thick, and the snow pattered down in bursts, but everything was mostly just... there. It was even a little beautiful: the white, the silver, the endless ice-capped water as far as the eye could see. Not the worst place to go.

"Suppose I should have held on tighter to that transmitter," she said, mostly to have something to say. "Going to make it mighty difficult to find me."

What happened to believing in our mystical Jedi powers.

"It's hardly magic," Branwen huffed. Her breath puffed up in front of her, but even that was cold. She'd stopped shivering, she noted distantly; likely she ought to have been more troubled by that than she was. "Anyway, I don't think your life sensing bit works if I'm dead."

Maybe you should try a little harder to keep alive then.

"I'll see what I can do."

What she could do wasn't all that much, though. She pulled her arms and legs in tighter and tucked her chin down, bundled as small and warm as she could manage, but it made little difference. Her body was a distant thing, heavy and icy and dragging, and it was monstrously hard to keep her eyes open. The frozen sea danced and dimmed in front of her, and that was only partly her fading vision—it would be night eventually, and the cold would creep in and steal her away into sleep.

"It's a pity, though," she said, mouth pressed against her knee. "I did rather think you'd be with me, at least."

She felt the sigh at her ear, breathless, and Sabine said, Me too.

Bran smiled. It wasn't much of a smile, but she felt it anyway—and a touch of warmth too, somewhere deep in her chest. It was barely anything, a echoing memory of an ember, but in the overwhelming cold, it burned merry and bright.

This time, when her eyes drifted shut, Sabine didn't prod her about it. If she let herself drift, Branwen could almost imagine she really was there—a slight touch against her arm, the feel of someone wrapped around her, keeping her sheltered from the wind and the cold.

"Keep talking," she said, a senseless mumble of wasted breath. "Tell me a story."

That's your job, Sabine grumbled. But then she said, Fine. Once upon a time.

Bran would have laughed if she'd had the energy for it. Instead she only listened to the voice on the wind, carrying words she couldn't hear. Outside it roared and whined, and light flashed, and maybe there would be a storm after all. It didn't matter. She was hardly even cold anymore—only tired, so tired, and full up with Sabine's voice, a thread of warmth spooled up inside her, the last flicker of a dying star. It was a small comfort to have Sabine's presence here at the end, and Sabine's hands on her frozen cheeks, and Sabine's eyes glaring at her, and Sabine's expression twisted up with desperation as she shouted over the wind, "You bloody idiot, wake up!"

"Oh," slurred Branwen, pleased. "You're here after all."

"I'm going to kill you," said Sabine, and then behind her was Enikö too, wasn't that lovely, and a small, bright-eyed woman in a garishly orange jacket, and that was... No, wait. What?

"Oh," said Branwen again, less pleased and more confused, sluggishly trying to put two thoughts together and coming up with six, or perhaps negative one. "Sorry. What's going on?"

"Stop trying to talk," said Sabine, who was not telling her a story nor wrapped around her nor a voice in her head, but a real and solid thing, nose and cheeks pink and eyes dark and sharp as knapped flint. "And keep your damned eyes open. Kid, the medbay—"

"Yes," said Enikö, and his head disappeared, and Branwen tracked him blearily to a familiar bulwark of silver metal parked precariously on the ice, which was even more confusing. What was the Luckrunner doing here?

"This can't possibly be the afterlife."

"Stop talking," Sabine said, sharp with something that must have been exasperation but looked surprisingly like fear. "Just— Let me work."

Bran had no idea what she meant by that, but then came a wash of— She didn't know the word for it. It was the feeling of the jump to lightspeed, and also the shape of her mother's smile, and also the everyday wonder of waking up to Sabine lying next to her. It was the first sip of Corellian brandy and the relief of seeing Enikö step out of the caves on Ilum with a crystal cupped in his palms and the adrenaline rush of a close escape. And it was the world entire, the whole of the galaxy, and also the simple, familiar feeling of Sabine's hands against her face, one with the Force, buoying her.

Branwen stopped talking. There was nothing more she could have said.

It took all three of them to help her down from her craggy ledge—Sabine and Enikö and the bright orange-jacket woman they'd collected along the way. The medbay was ready for her when they got her into the ship, and she was grateful to miss the sting and stink of the bacta when they slid her into the tank, and afterwards she slept long and hard and woke to Sabine at her bedside.

She looked as though she'd fallen asleep, head hug low, except her eyes were open and bright and sharp when Bran met them, and all the clever things she'd meant to say evaporated on her tongue, and in their place Branwen said, "Are you alright?"

"You're asking me?"

Branwen gave her a look, pointed. She looked like she hadn't slept—which was not an unusual look for her, but was more unusual these days. Sabine shook her head and snorted, then shrugged as though heaving off some great weight.

"I heard you," she said, blunt, and made a face that Branwen couldn't read. "Felt you. When you were down there. In the Force."

"Oh. That's... unusual?"

Sabine snorted again, which was a yes. Branwen hummed and sank back against the pillows.

For a moment, neither of them said anything. Branwen turned the idea of it over in her head, but she knew little of the Force, and minded its meanings even less. If Sabine said it was strange it was, but it wasn't exactly her strangeness to bother about.

The harried, hunted glint in Sabine's eye, though—

"I'm alright," she said. "It was an impressive rescue operation."

Sabine made another face, a worse one, and Branwen struggled to sit upright. Sabine grumbled at her and helped with the pillows anyway, and Branwen caught her hand before she could pull it away.

"If it's a bad thing, the Force bit—"

"It isn't." She took a deep breath, bracing. "I— It reminded me of— I would prefer not to feel that again."

Branwen took a long, careful breath around the sudden, welling grief. It was a familiar thing by now, and only half hers—but the trouble with loving a Jedi was that it was impossible to only love one of them alone, when they were too tangled in each other to ever be wholly unraveled.

"I'm sorry." She meant it, deeply and fully.

Sabine nodded, and then she said, "It will happen again."

Branwen couldn't deny that. It wasn't just them, after all. It was them and also the deal Branwen had made to a man with a starbird patch on his sleeve that echoed the symbol of the Order, wings raised in flight. The promise to strive for something better than any one of them. That part Branwen wasn't sorry about.

"I'll be more careful."

"No you won't."

"Of course I will. No more solo escape pods."

"If that's your way of warning me next time you'll be exiting a ship without an escape pod—"

"I think they call that disembarking. Most people do it after landing."

"You're not most people."

"How sweet of you to say," Branwen preened, but then she sobered and squeezed Sabine's hand. "Turned out fine, yeah?"

"If you call six hours in a bacta bath fine."

"Could have been worse." Sabine had been in far worse positions, Branwen didn't point out—that was ammunition for another time, not now, not the sliver of tender fear being so cleanly, clearly offered. "A dashing Jedi came to save me."

Sabine didn't roll her eyes, but somehow she perfectly gave off the impression that she could have, and still might. Warmth flashed in Branwen again, a deep and welling and endless thing, spark enough to tide her through a year of winter nights.

"And I supposed Nikö was there too. And— I feel terrible, I didn't catch her name. The orange one. Are we picking up strays again?"

"Hardly we," Sabine said. "The kid made a friend."

Branwen's eyebrows climbed up into her hairline. "Oh?"

"Ask him about it," she said, but her expression was all smugness, which was a delight. And to think, she could have missed this.

"I will. Help me up? I'd die for a cup of caf."

"Please don't," Sabine said, but she eased an arm around Branwen's waist and helped her out of the medbay and into the galley, where Enikö and the orange woman—whose name was Middy, who had helped them off Abregado, who had a familiar sort of keenness about her—waited for them.

[altocat]

For the longest time, I used to think Sephiroth was a calm, nice person who got extremely hurt by Genesis', Angeal's, Lazard's betrayal and by finding out he was an experiment and he went insane.

Now I think Sephiroth lived his entire life on the edge of insanity and people like Glenn, Angeal and Lazard unknowingly kept him from Meteoring the Planet out of existence. He just needed a little push. He got an extremely big push, but that doesn't mean it took that much to break him.

I'm not sure on that. While I think Sephiroth was always due for a breakdown, this is merely because of the circumstances that escalated his mental health issues. With that said, that's not to say it would have been a violent breakdown, or one that would result in him having a complete personality 180. There might have been other options there too, and possibly ones with better outcomes after treatment.

I don't think there was truly any evil in Sephiroth's heart, at least not until Nibelheim. Darkness, of course. But there's darkness in everyone. For all his coldness, seriousness, and distancing from others, Sephiroth seems to genuinely love his friends and maintains a sense of honor. He does terrible things under orders, but the malice isn't there. What would have been healthy for him is if he opened up to people more instead of bottling up his pain and insecurities. But First Soldier seems to be showing us that side of him with a knowledge that it doesn't end well, so perhaps Sephiroth was slowly pushed into a more restrictive line of thinking there too.

Nibelheim was a culmination of worst case outcomes. I think if things were slightly different--if he'd retired, if he'd learned the truth in a gentler fashion, if his friends hadn't left, if he'd been far away from Jenova, etc.--he might have been okay. Damaged. Probably extremely depressed, but okay and able to heal.

Sephiroth didn't go through life wanting to destroy humanity. If anything, he wanted to feel included, and was depressed at knowing that he was different and didn't know why. There was probably some paranoia and bitterness towards people that was slowly collecting over the years from the things he saw under Shinra. But Sephiroth was crushed when he learned that his humanity was nothing more than a lie.

I can't say for sure if Sephiroth was a good person before Nibelheim. His actions under Shinra speak for themselves. But I do believe he was trying his best to BE a good person with the very limited resources he had, not because he felt obligated to but because he WANTED to. There might have been the possibility of instability always lurking there. But Sephiroth truly just wanted the peace and dignity of a normal human life.