#and I’ll fuck up all my friendships I have here
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enigma-the-anomaly · 2 years ago
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:(
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deathxproof · 1 year ago
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hm, out of all of the things I was expecting when I slowly started putting myself back in fandom spaces, “unresolved trauma from being an autistic kid/teen who was always perceived as Too Much” wasn’t on the list, to be quite honest.
#ooc !#maybe I’ll unpack this more on my personal blog later. Who’s to say. not me certainly.#but yeah the amount of friendships/relationships I had from like. elementary school to high school(to even some of college)#where like. it’s suddenly revealed to me incredibly late that I’m being seen as overbearing / overwhelming / needing or being Too Much#and by then there is no fixing it yknow. by then they’re just telling you to get you to fuck off (or telling other people and not you lol)#(that happened way more often in online fandom spaces)(but tbh my hang-ups in online fandom spaces)#(come WAY MORE from like. interactions with Very Particular People)#(who self-admitted to like. actively trying to dig up dirt that didn’t exist on people ‘just in case’.)(or if they just didn’t like someone#(they aren’t around here anymore but nevertheless the few times we interacted and they tried that w me made me paranoid for ages </3333)#ANYWAYS if you read this far: hiiiiiiiii#i’m doing fine but oh god the weird nostalgic loneliness of being That Kid really hit me all at once#I’m still so bad at making friends now because of all of this naksdak#like I have to put effort into keeping up with people or else I’ll accidentally hold myself back / kind of isolate#under the assumption of like ‘oh you don’t want to scare this person away do you? you don’t want to be overbearing right?’#and it’s like. hey. hey brain. hey bitch. we gotta talk to people to actually form relationships with them. that’s how this works.#vent#anyways I gotta go build a closet now ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ...
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plugnuts · 2 years ago
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I'm kinda curious to know your favorite ship dynamic (or dynamics!!)
Friends to lovers for sure!
As an aroace person myself I need SOME kind of positive dynamic already in place, and if they’re friends it’s just so easy to think of them as something more, y’know? It’s about the slow realisation that the person you’ve been friends with for so long, who’s been with you through thick and thin actually means so much more to you. The realisation that brings down an intense weight upon the one who realises, the thought that if this doesn’t go right then everything could be ruined.
Emotions, feelings, they all get thrown into the balance and that’s everything to me. Especially if they’re just. Normal friends at the start of the story. Then something big happens that throws everything off, feelings are realised, and then everything is Different. That’s where it is AT.
Even in a story where a pair isn’t friends at first! As long as they become friends and build from there it’s great. There just needs to be some kind of positive buildup for it to work.
Spiralling off a bit, but for me to ship a ship they need to have positive interactions. They need to be friends. Need to bounce off each other in a way that’s not malicious. This is why enemies to lovers doesn’t work for me. I’d never be able to understand how people can ship two people who hate/are against each other because there’s just. Nothing positive to build on lol.
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insanechayne · 4 months ago
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#every time I call someone my best friend they turn into a fucking problem that just hurts me and makes me sick#is it me? am I doing something wrong? am I not supposed to have close friends?#or am I just such a fuckup that by being myself it’s inevitable that I’ll ruin my friendships?#kissed my bro on the cheek last week when he wasn’t doing too great and in my mind I was doing it just as an extra way to be encouraging#and show my support and that I’m here for him cause tbh I’ve done that with plenty of other friends and it ain’t no thing#but after a week of wondering why he’s been distant and not wanting to be around me when I’m saying I just need some time with a friend he#finally admits that he thought that was weird and out of line. so I gotta backtrack and try to explain myself but now all the stupid little#pieces be fitting and I realize that he’s probably been misconstruing me wanting time with him as thinking I’m gonna try to flirt with him#or something else fucking dumb like that. despite the fact that that has never been the case and he knows me fundamentally as a person and#should know I wouldn’t ever do anything that could make either of us cheaters even incidentally. plus he’s basically like a brother to me#and I have an AFAB partner so it’s not like I’m trolling for cock anyway and he knows that too. but now I gotta go back through every#interaction we’ve had since that happened and analyze whether or not I was weird or awkward or inappropriate in some way that he could be#upset about at all. and also act like everything is fine and keep it pushing like normal and police every future action to be safe too#because of course he can’t just be straight up about anything or tell me if something bothered him no I gotta play a whole ass fucking#guessing game. and now I also can’t trust that my best friend who is supposed to know me so well won’t take things I say/do the wrong way.#can’t trust that my best friend won’t see me in a poor light now because it’s clearly been affecting the friendship#and like totally that’s my bad I overstepped a boundary I didn’t realize was there but you should have just fucking told me at the time#instead of pulling this shit and giving me anxiety and blowing me off and making me feel like shit#can’t rely on him or trust him or anything and what’s the fucking point of even having a best friend if this is what happens? I’m at the end#of my fucking rope right now so stressed and anxious and no matter how much I try to talk to him or anything he just brushes me off and#won’t let me explain or get my feelings out or anything else. but hey at least I was around for him the other day when he needed somebody#good thing I was there to keep him from going back to drinking or something else stupid and could help him out. cause that’s what really#matters right just being able to help somebody else when they need it even if they don’t reciprocate and are actively hurting me instead of#just being there for me as a friend. guess we try again tomorrow huh? what else can be done I suppose. just get to suffer and be riddled#with anxiety and stress and depression eating away at me and ruining my fucking life. can’t even enjoy the Olympics or anything else because#I’m stuck overthinking this dumb shit. just want this to be over and things to be back to normal. wanna stop being upset about this shit and#be able to let it go but I don’t fucking know how and I can’t keep losing friends because it’s killing me#personal
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illusioncanthurtme--art · 2 months ago
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A very self indulgent Billford playlist!
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Self indulgent, because this music does not appeal to the masses at all; these songs are limited to the stuff I listen to. So I’m being VERY transparent about my embarrassing taste in music right now! Plus, NOBODY ASKED FOR THIS!!! But I hope some of these resonate with you. This is a little collection I’ve formed in my phone notes since I got into this ship a couple weeks ago.
Not a fancy spotify playlist, it’s just links to the music on youtube. 
I’ve got this divided into parts:
-The Billford Songs
-The In This Moment Billford Songs
SO MUCH of their music is enemies/lovers perfection. I’ve thought about so many *killing you but also making out with you* pairings to this shit, because these songs were like, DESIGNED to be recycled for any and all love hate relationships, and still hit insanely hard EVERY TIME. So now that you have these songs under your belt, you have them FOREVER. You’re welcome. I haven’t even listened to all their music, I’m sure there’s more songs for this category that I simply haven’t discovered.
-The…Maybe…Billford Songs
My standards were kinda high for making this list. But every song is about your ship when you’re insane, right??? So these are the maybe’s. One’s I’ve thought about billford to, but maybe the lyrics don’t totally align.
Playlist under the cut! I wasn’t gonna ramble about each song but WHOOPS I DID 🤷‍♀️
The Billford songs:
Monophobia - Deadmau5 (Extended version, cuz it’s the best.)
THE LYRICS… THE LYRICS!!!! Definitely bill pining in theraprism. 
Propane Nightmares - Pendulum
This one WAS gonna go in the maybe’s, but I convinced myself otherwise after listening to it eighty more times, and now it’s up here on top. And fuck it, this is the *self indulgent* billford playlist, so I do what I want. I go into a fucking trance when I listen to this song, so I can’t really explain 110% why this is a billford song to me, but I’ll try.  Apparently, this song is about the heavens gate cult. So not enemies/lovers angst. But looking at the lyrics, you could interpret it as giving yourself to something greater, and coming to the realization that what you pledged yourself to is actually a very bad thing which will ultimately destroy you. (also, you can’t deny that there was some cult like manipulation happening with Bill and Ford. Sense of purpose and friendship.) Definitely billford-y when you consider Fords commitment to bill. And I’ll admit, when I listen to it, there is some pov switching. Because the “trail of fire”,  “we will be as one”, and “bring it on home” is VERY reminiscent of bill executing weirdmageddon. So overall, my interpretation of this song is Ford feeling torn about bill, feeling regret, feeling scared, and Bill of course, just wanting to bring the dimensions together. “BRING IT ON HOME!!!!”  Or I just like the song. 
Rule 34 - Fish in a Birdcage
Bestie recommended this song to me. It needs no explanation.
Painkiller - The Queenstons
…NEEDS NO EXPLANATION DSKFDSKJHF It’s similar to the above, just more… scary imo. Violent. Definitely bill being a little psycho. I really love this song. It’s very recyclable too. You have it for any toxic ship now. 
9V - The Queenstons
One of my favorite Lapfox/Halley Labs songs… I’m gonna give you the lyrics, it’s a bit hard to understand without them. In my eyes, it’s about betraying Ford. Also these vocals (and other music by this artist) works so well for bill because of the synthesized voice. 
LoveBOMB - S3RL
This is a new S3RL song. This song sounds like a tantrum, and I really liked it when I first heard it, but it didn't fit anything I was into at the time. Luckily, bill suffered a horrible breakup, and now this song has it’s meaning. 
When I'm There - S3RL
Bill thinking about joining the third dimension with Ford. 
Click Bait - S3RL
I’ve listened to this one a LOT before this, and I surprised myself with how much it aligns with bill, specifically, him tricking Ford.
Space-Time - S3RL
Speaks for itself.
Sodom & Gomorrah - Dorian Electra
This one’s just funny :)
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The In This Moment Billford Songs
Sick Like Me
Sexual Hallucination
This is one of those recyclable songs, but I was damn surprised at how well the lyrics suited them, because it alludes to being out of body, possession, etc.
Blood
Half God half devil
Roots
Whore
Damn it, I cant deny this one suits them.
Big Bad Wolf
DAMN IT I wasn’t gonna include this one, but I just checked the lyrics and fuck, it works. In this moment, how are you so wonderful
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The…Maybe…Billford Songs
Illuminaughty - Infected Mushroom
I'm kind of grasping at straws with these lyrics, but with a title like that? Come on
The Pretender - Foo Fighters, Infected Mushroom, Turbo Remix
Three versions, for whichever suits your fancy.
Leopold - Infected Mushroom
This one has NO LYRICS, but it has this buildup that sounds really cool, and it has an abrupt decrescendo. Reminds me of their "friendship" and how it all came crashing down.
Idolize - Dorian Electra
Hmmmmm, I just like Dorian. But the idolization thing works for obvious reasons.
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That’s it! Hope you enjoy. Maybe I'll do an expansion pack of sorts if I find enough songs for a part 2.
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5sospenguinqueen · 3 months ago
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Needle Little Love - Charles Leclerc x Ferrari! Reader
Summary: When you’re announced as Ferrari’s newest driver, fans love the budding friendship between you and Charles, especially when he adopts your penchant for crochet puns. Netflix expose that there’s more to the story. 
Warnings: Slightly suggestive content. Swearing. Fluff
2023-2024 timeline. Pinterest pics.
Requested: Yes by @rebelwrites. Find the full request here
A/N: There's a blurb halfway down
F1 Masterlist
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its_ynln just posted
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liked by charles_leclerc, olliebearman and others 
its_ynln chronicles of yarnia 🧶
1,609 comments 
francisca.cgomes okay but i’m gonna need that top in all colours please
→ its_ynln let me get your measurements at zandvoort 
user1 what is charles doing here
→ its_ynln i’m plagued by his brother and we both like to go zoom?
→ arthur_leclerc just for that, i’m not coming to your celebration party in zandvoort. i’ll go party with charles
→ its_ynln don’t want you there anyway 
→ oscarpiastri @/charles_leclerc the girls are fighting again 
→ user2 i love how they’re just assuming she’ll win 
lilymhe i love my pillow! thank you thank you thank you 🌼
→ alex_albon she literally carries it everywhere and i’m not allowed to touch it 
user3 we love how racing is just her side hobby 
jackdoohan day 116 of asking you to make me my own dinosaur 
→ its_ynln i can make a voodoo doll of you if you don’t stop pestering me
→ jackdoohan i’ll be glad when you’re gone
→ user4 gone where! 
→ user5 well she is currently leading the f2 championship, and they won't let her back 
user6 drop the patterns please, babe
user7 i love how half the people here are because of her crochet, not because she drives
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f1 just posted
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liked by ferraridriveracademy, oscarpiastri and others 
f1 welcome to the team @/its_ynln we look forward to seeing you on the grid in the new year 
5,533 comments
its_ynln what can i say, it’s knot just another hobby
→ user8 babe, stick to crochet. stand up comedy is not for you 
ferraridriveracademy take good care of our girl 
→ scuderiaferrari thanks for letting us have her
charles_leclerc welcome to the team 😄
→ user9 why is this the blandest welcome ever 
→ user10 someone feels threatened
→ arthur_leclerc *trying to contain his excitement
francisca.cgomes this is the best news ever. will you teach me to crochet?
→ pierregasly because stealing my girlfriend over summer break wasn’t bad enough?
�� its_ynln are you still salty that she let me touch her boobs
→ user11 i know it was to measure her chest for clothes but still.. 
scuderiaferrari are we going to have to pr train you? @/its_ynln
→ liamlawson30 yes
→ alex_albon yes 
→ jackdoohan yes
→ its_ynln why am i being attacked by twice the amount of people now? 
arthur_leclerc thank god she’s not my problem anymore 
→ its_ynln i’ll always be your problem, little leclerc 
→ oscarpiastri oh fuck, she’s my problem now
charles_leclerc just posted
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liked by maxverstappen1, pierregasly and others  
charles_leclerc winter break spent somewhere sunny  
2,316 comments
scuderiaferrari come back, we miss you 
user1 um, whose hand is he reaching for in that first pic 
→ user2 idk but we should be saying thank you for dressing him in that shirt 
its_ynln is your skin ferrari red yet 
→ charles_leclerc no, i keep getting slathered in sun cream :(
→ arthur_leclerc factor 50? 
→ user3 i love that she’s bullying him before she’s even been his teammate on track
user4 this shirt looks similar to one yn posted a few weeks ago??
→ user5 and the hat!!
→ user6 omg how cute would it be if charles was asking her to crochet him some clothes 
→ user7 we love a supportive teammate
landonorris rocking the bucket hat, mate. think i can get one in papaya? 
→ charles_leclerc i’ll hook you up
oscarpiastri i miss you, dad
→ its_ynln i’m not babysitting next year. just putting that out there ahead of time 
→ charles_leclerc not even if i ask nicely?
→ its_ynln maybe if you let me win
→ charles_leclerc 🤔🤨
user8 why are we skipping past the sneaky soft launch?
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2024
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“You know, we both have driver’s rooms for this sort of thing,” you breathed, giggling when Charles’ facial hair tickled your neck. 
His mouth sucked gently on the pulse point thrumming beneath his tongue, tracing kisses from your ear down to your collarbone. The stack of worn tyres cushioned your back as he pressed your harder against them when you reached around to pinch his backside. 
“Oi, I’m talking to you.” 
“I’m sorry, mon ange, but you looked so good when you were giving that interview. And you kept laughing-”
“Oh, so it’s not that I’m so irresistible that you couldn't wait until we were safely in the garage. It’s that you were jealous.” You raised an eyebrow at him, unable to fight the smile at his rougish grin. 
“You are irresistible,” he murmured, hands snaking around your waist to pull you flush against him. “Why else would I be making out with you in an alley behind the motorhome?”
“Because you’re a horndog.” 
You and Charles had been dating for the past year, having met after he caught you winding up his younger brother one race weekend. Ferrari had been eyeing you up all year, asking the Monagesque what he thought of you, prompting him to pay closer attention. Prior to you signing your contract, you’d had to disclose your relationship to Fred Vasseur. Whilst the senior members of the team were aware of your more-than-teammates status, the majority of the paddock were in the dark. Both of you wished to keep the relationship under wraps until your rookie year in F1 had passed, reducing speculation that Charles was the only reason you got your seat. Sneaking around the motorhome was a lot safer than making out behind tyre stacks, but Charles didn’t care at this moment in time. 
“You going to be nice and let me win today?” He teased, nibbling at your lower lip. 
“I think you mean, am I going to let you massage my feet after I win? I won here last year.”
“Yes, yes, bow down to you.”
“Well, I do like you on your knees.” 
Grinning, Charles captured your lips with his once more. Tongue swiping against your bottom lip, he groaned against you when your tongue met his. Hands snaking into his hair, you tugged gently on the soft strands, enjoying the whimper you pulled from his lips. He tilted his hips, pressing himself against you. 
“The things you do to me.”
A loud cough - more of a throat clearing - tore the two of you apart. Wide eyed and panting, you both turned in horror to look at the misfortune person who stumbled across you. Fred Vasseur stood at the end of the alleyway, shaking his head at his two drivers. It was bad enough watching them make heart eyes at each other during data reviews but this. Behind him stood a cameraman and a mic guy, mouths agape at their luck. Drive to Survive would be flooded with viewers once they teased this. Breaking News: Ferrari drivers caught locking lips in secret tryst. 
“I’ve got Netflix following me around today.” Fred said bluntly, staring you both down. 
“Oh crap.”
“Yeah.” 
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next day
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charles_leclerc just posted
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liked by its_ynln, arthur_leclerc and others
charles_leclerc you could say we’re a close knit bunch
4,416 comments
its_ynln i fell for you hook, yarn and stitcher 
user8 not charles adopting her crochet puns 
jackdoohan so he gets a toothless keychain and i still don’t get my dinosaur? 
→ liamlawson30 that’s because he’s sleeping with her
→ jackdoohan if that’s the price...
scuderiaferrari finally. we were getting sick and tired of archiving all the pics we took of you both being cute. now we can post! 
→ arthur_leclerc please don’t. it’s bad enough seeing it in person for the past two years. i don’t want it on my timeline
→ user9 two years! they’ve been together two years! 
alex_albon can’t believe you posted a photo of her in a nice dress and didn't even give her photo creds
→ its_ynln he’s intimidated by my raw talent 
→ oscarpiastri i watched you flip over the handles of your bike the other day 
→ its_ynln raw talent
→ charlesleclerc @/its_ynln when was this? why didn’t you tell me? are you okay? 
georgrussell63 did she beat you?
→ charles_leclerc i let her win
→ landonorris yeah, you’ve been saying that all season, mate
→ its_ynln you got a nice consolation price out of it tho
→ arthur_leclerc ew!
user10 i love that charles has posted this and yn hasn’t mentioned anything about him lol 
→ user11 her entire insta is the two sides of her personality; car and yarn. can't have a man ruining the aesthetic
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A huge thank you to @rebelwrites for the request. I hope this lives up to expectations
Requests for F1 smau's are open. You can see who I write for on my Masterlist :)
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ham1lton · 4 months ago
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GOOD LUCK, BABE!
pairings: charles leclerc x reader (romantic/platonic).
summary: friendships don’t always survive, you and charles would know.
warnings: cheating towards the end. no smut but a makeout session. sorry alex 💔
author’s note: the brocedes au that me and anon wanted. i’m trying something new btw. let me know how u feel about it.
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you never imagined yourself in the same room as charles. not willingly anyways. yet, when you received the invitation with his handwritten note asking you to come. you knew you couldn’t say no. you had spent so much of your childhood discussing the future. he wanted a family. three kids, a dog and a gorgeous wife that loved him. you wanted a career. the glory, the accolades and the fans that loved you.
he made you promise one day that you’d be at his wedding. you were fifteen at the ice cream shop that he’d always drag you too. you had snuck out without arthur in order to have an extra scoop after charles’ dad had paid for the ice cream you’d had earlier. he looked over at you, eyes serious and asked you to be his best man — (“best woman, best girl. it doesn’t matter. i just want you next to me. i’m serious yn.” he took a lick of his ice cream and the seriousness melted away when he left a smudge on his nose.)
you didn’t break promises easily.
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however, when arthur came running up to you, asking you to follow him. when your relationship with charles disintegrated, you never lost touch with arthur. he was like a little brother to you. you would very rarely meet him for brunch in whatever city you happened to both be in. so when he asked you to follow him, you did willingly.
“where are we going?” you ask, as he pulls you along by your right hand. “usually, whenever you don’t give me context it means you’re doing something bad. is this something bad leclerc?”
“when am i ever doing something bad?” he looks over his shoulder and gives you a wink. you roll your eyes. he plants you in front of a room and nods at it. you stare at him blankly.
“okay? i’m not a mind reader arthur.”
“i need you to help me look for something.” he nods at the room. “in there.”
“you can do it yourself.” you turn to leave before he runs in front of you and stops you.
“listen. i don’t care if you had that weird breakup with my brother,” you start to protest that it wasn’t a breakup but he stops you. “but you didn’t need to cut me off too. you were a part of my life too. you abandoned me too.”
“i don’t ask you for anything yn but i need your help. i’m looking for my silver cufflinks. i need them.” he raised his cuffs to show you the distinct lack of cufflinks. “please. i’m begging you. i wouldn’t ask otherwise.”
you didn’t expect to come here to be blackmailed and guilt tripped but it was working. you avoided everything leclerc. even his family, especially his family if you were being honest. they went from being your second family to nothing at all.
“okay.” you nod. “i’ll get your cufflinks.”
arthur smiles and opens the door for you to walk in. it’s someone’s hotel room. either arthur’s or a friend’s. it’s messy and you sigh. it’ll be hard finding them in this mess but you start carding through clothes.
“yn?”
you know that voice anywhere. you turn around and it’s charles. he’s half dressed in his wedding suit, his crisp white shirt half unbuttoned. his hair is still messy as if he’s ran his hand through nervously multiple times. you smile with no teeth and move to open the door. it’s locked.
“arthur leclerc! open this fucking door!” you seethe. you bang against the door and hear his voice through the material.
“not until you fucking talk! i’ll be back in half an hour.” you hear his footsteps walk away. you turn to charles who smiles sheepishly at you.
“tea?”
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liked by messyass1, messyass2 and 1,737,883 others.
ham1ltonshaderoom: it seems all the rumours are true. sworn enemies f1 drivers charles leclerc and yn yln have seemed to call a truce to celebrate his wedding to art historian alexandra saint mleux. she was seen wearing a dark green vivienne westwood gown as she celebrated the couple’s nuptials.
what do we think about the rekindling of this flame, ham1ltons?
view all 679,498 comments
user1: CHARLESYN IN THE SAME ROOM NO ARGUING NO FIGHTS WE CHEERED!!
user2: i wish we had pictures of her. she always eats her outfits.
-> user3: wtf how does she digest them?
-> user2: figure of speech babe <3
user4: did she have a date??
-> user5: her longtime boyfriend!!
user6: they worked it out on the remix
-> user7: so FERRARI ❤️
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charles makes you the tea. he doesn’t finish buttoning his shirt as he pours it into a mug for you. he remembered how you liked it - two sugars and a splash of milk. you stay silent but nod gratefully.
it’s been so long since you’ve been alone with him. you’re not the same wide eyed kid but neither is he. he’s getting married and you’re giving him the silent treatment. he sits on the edge of his bed awkwardly. tapping his thigh with a single finger.
“thank you for coming,” he says. “i didn’t think you would.”
“the handwritten invitation was a nice choice,” you sip your tea. “personal. did everyone else like it?”
“only yours was,” he coughs into his elbow. “handwritten, i mean. only yours.”
that’s news to you but you don’t have time to ponder what that means before he speaks again.
“i’ve thought for the longest time on what i’d say to you if i got the chance. everything. how sorry i was, how sorry i am, how much i hated you and how much you meant to me. you were my best friend yn. my best friend. no one has even come close to what you were for me.” he chuckles as he presses his palms into his eyes. “who else could i talk to besides you?”
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(insert a tiktok edit of the two of you throughout your careers. the song playing over it is the song ‘chemtrails over the country club’ by lana del ray specifically the lyrics ‘nobody’s son/nobody’s daughter’. it gets 167k likes.)
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“do you still hate me?” charles looks at you under his lashes.
“of course i do. you hurt me.”
“you hurt me. but i don’t hate you.” charles fidgets in his seat. he stretches his hands to place them on his knees. you sip your tea. “do you remember when i asked you to be my best woman?”
you nod.
“i didn’t mean that. i wanted you to be my wife.”
you would choke on your tea if you didn’t know that information but charles wasn’t subtle. yet it was a case of missed opportunities. you didn’t like him then and he didn’t like you now.
“i couldn’t hate you yn. god knows i tried. it hurts me knowing that you hate me as i could never hate you. i said all that shit because i was hurt and angry. you said i was a shitty driver. that i wouldn’t have won without ferrari’s strategies which we both know are shit-“
“i’m sorry, i didn’t know you still cared about my opinion.” you interrupt. your voice still has a defensive edge to it. he just shrugs.
“i’ll always care about your opinion.”
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CHARLESYNNIES TWITTER GC (est.2017)
user1: editing yn to l’amour de ma vie by billie eilish (extended version) rn 😋
user2: what part?
user1: listen from 2:15 till 2:56!!
user3: THATS GONNA EATT OMGGGG
user4: wish we could edit the wedding appearance of the two of them omggg.
user5: when i get off my lazy ass and finish my edit of them to ‘the girl so confusing’ remix
user6: do y’all think they’re talking at the wedding?
user7: babe do you know yn? she’s probably at the very corner of the reception right now. she’ll take a pic with every other leclerc besides charles and probably leave before dinner is served.
user8: you’re so real. yn would NEVER talk to charles let alone be alone with him. i hate it but it’s the truth.
user9: plus charles is probably busy with the wedding.
────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ──────
you never considered yourself to be a bad person but making out with your ex best friend/teammate literally a few hours before he’s about to get married? that’s a bitch move.
you try to think about his fiancée. she’s probably getting ready excitedly with her family and friends. thinking about being the future mrs leclerc while you’re two minutes away from committing adultery on both of your partners.
you pull apart from charles. he looks at you with wide eyes.
“we can’t fucking do this. we’re awful people,” you sit up. “my fucking lipgloss is all over your mouth.”
“i look good in pink. it’ll be fine.” he wipes it off.
“you have a fiancée. you’re getting married.”
“tell me the word and i’ll call it off. just for you.” he looks at you. “i’m quitting f1 after this year anyways. i’m not attempting to go for the second championship. i don’t want it.”
“how do you not want it?”
“we have different priorities but i won’t be a f1 driver anymore. you always said you couldn’t date a driver. i’ve grown now. i’m fine being in your shadow. i love it. i want it.”
he looks at you as serious as he did when he asked you to be his best woman all those years ago.
“what do you want yn?”
you bite your lip, and think.
────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ──────
CHARLESYNNIES TWITTER GC (est.2017)
user7: i’m hoping we get at least a picture. just one.
user4: i would DIE!!! imagine!!!
user3: charlesynnies suffer every day and everyone else wins.
user2: i think yn is right there with charles. maybe dancing.
user1: he always said she’d be at his wedding. he was right. i think there is still love there.
user5: FINISHED MY FUCK ASS EDIT PLEASE LIKE AND COMMENT ON TIKTOK BESTIES
user6: okay i wrote a little fic for ao3. it’s called ‘wait until you like me again’!! it’s domestic charlesyn as they are forced to work everything out. kinda angsty but really smutty.
user1: spamming u both charlesynnies are the best idc <3
────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ──────
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charles_leclerc: say hello to mr and mrs leclerc 💍
tagged: alexandrasaintmleux
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yourusername: happy for you 💕
────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ──────
INTERVIEW WITH CHARLES LECLERC
interviewer — so is it true? you’re renewing your ferrari contract?
charles (laughing) — it is true. racing is my life. this is it for me. it’d take something big to take me away from it.
interviewer: you all heard it here first!
────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ──────
— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryy @aliciaablueprint @lennnooshh @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @marshmummy @23victoria @ourlifeforchaos @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @tsireyasgf @landososcar @yongi-lee @maxlarens @velentine @m1892 @blushmimi @evans-dejong @nixisracing @lethalvenus @santanasaintmendes @idontknowlmaoo @sainzluvrr (charles specific tags will be added to the comments!)
────── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ──────
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fum1ku · 5 months ago
Text
LOVE TROPES - HQ BOYS
ft. osamu miya, daichi sawamura, kei tsukishima, keishin ukai, atsumu miya
should i be working on the highly requested pt. 2 to my recent works that’s currently sitting in my drafts? yes. should i also probably be working on the few requests i’ve got in my inbox? also yes. am i still over here writing whatever this is instead of doing those things? absolutely. at least i’m writing something!
OSAMU: friends to lovers.
you had been friends with the miya twins since high school. you had always butt heads with atsumu; bickering back and forth about anything and everything. but it was different with osamu. it felt like you both understood each other, in a way. plus the mutual dislike you both had for atsumu definitely helped. and now, nearly 8 years later, your friendship was still going strong.
well past 8pm, you stood over the front counter at onigiri miya with samu cleaning behind the counter for closing, and atsumu sitting at a stool next to you.
“i don’t know what his problem is! we go out for drinks one night, wind up at his place, and then the next day he can’t even be bothered to send me a single fucking text. seriously. i’m done!” you were going on about your.. most recent boyfriend.
“why don’tcha just dump him then?” atsumu offered, his mouth full of the onigiri osamu had made for him.
“atsumu, you’re disgusting! and i can’t because we aren’t even a thing! which is good—i don’t want us to be.”
osamu laughed at you two from behind the counter.
“okay well then what’s the problem! i don’t understand you women,” atsumu exclaimed, licking off the last bits of onigiri form his fingertips and shoving his plate behind the counter. “i’ve got practice tomorrow. so i’m gone. some of us actually have real problems that aren’t centered around one night stands with guys!”
“oh right, atsumu, like your sex life is any better,” you muttered. the door slammed shut behind him as the bell above the door exhibierst through the building.
you sighed, sinking further into your chair.
“here,” osamu slid a plate towards you. “might make ‘ya feel better. plus i need feedback to see if it’s worth addin’ to the menu.”
you smiled. “thanks, osamu. and yeah, i’ll give good feedback, promise!”
osamu smiled to himself as he wiped down the back counter. yeah, sure, after 8 years of pining he was no closer to asking you out. but, no matter what, he’d always be here to make you food whenever another boy made you cry.
DAICHI: love at first sight.
it had been a long practice and daichi had decided to treat everyone to a snack down at sakanoshita. daichi stood with suga and asahi waiting for the 1st and 2nd years to finish grabbing their fill. tanaka and noya had seen daichi paying as an opportunity to grab whatever they wanted.
“c’mon you guys!” suga yelled from across the store. “we don’t have all day!”
it has been a long day of classes for you, so it wasn’t even an option in your mind whether you should stop at the convenience store or not. only now you had found yourself in your own little debate.
“milk tea.. or coffee?” you mumbled to yourself. you were bent down over the drinks section taking your sweet time.
daichi turned around to see you and knew he was gone right then and there.
suga scoffed at the two 2nd years taking their time, only to turn back and find daichi’s gaze focused on you.
“hey, daichi, maybe we should—” he started, but stopped as soon as he noticed daichi staring. he whispered to asahi and they both began berating their poor captain.
“c’mon, dude! why don’t you just go talk to them? we obviously have the time!” suga nudged at his arm.
daichi denied anything. “hey, i don’t even now what you’re talking about, suga! we’re here for snack for the team, just go focus on that.”
“hey, don’t we go to school with them? y/n l/n. class 2, i think,” asahi piped up. he couldn’t remember where exactly he knew you from, though.
daichi was sure if he had gone to school with you, he’d remember.
“they’re in photography club! that’s how i know them! they asked me to join after i dropped out of volleyball,” asahi recalled, loud enough to grab your attention.
you looked up to find the set of 3rd years staring in your direction. your drink in hand, you made your way up to them.
“azumane, right? nice to see you again!” you beamed.
“y-yeah, right! good to see you too, l/n,” he smiled, nervously.
“are you guys in line?” you questioned.
“no—no we’re not! sorry about that!” daichi apologized, moving to the side to allow you to get to the register.
you placed your drink on the counter, making small talk with the guy at the front register.
“c’mon, daichi! if you don’t ask them before they leave you might not get to again!” suga whispered.
“suga, let it go. it’s too strange—they don’t even know me.”
suga shoved daichi forward just as you turned around to make your way towards the door.
“oh! hi!” you mused.
“s-sorry. hi.. again.”
“sawamura, right? you’re the captains of the volleyball team!” you smiled.
“yeah, i am. and you’re l/n, right? asahi was telling me about you. you’re in photography.
“i am, actually! and please, just call me y/n!”
“then just call me daichi!”
first name basis after 10 minutes? way to go daichi!
“actually..” you started. “i was wondering if it’d be possible for me to take some action shots of the volleyball team? i was going to use them for an upcoming project of mine. of course if not, that’s okay too! you probably need to talk it over with the team.”
“yeah—absolutely! i’ll have to talk it over with everyone, but i don’t see it being a problem at all,” he said, nervously rubbing the back of his neck. “what class are you in? i can talk to you some time next week to figure out what day would work best.”
“here,” you said, turning around to the man behind the counter. “excuse me, do you have a pen i could borrow?”
the man tossed you a pen, not giving a second look to you from behind his magazine. you pulled out daichi’s arm and started scribbling down numbers.
your.. phone number?
“now you can call me, that’ll be easier!” you smiled. “anyways, i gotta run. see you later, daichi. tell azumane i said bye too!”
he was speechless. did he really manage to get your number without even trying?
suga ran up behind him. “dude! how? you hardly said anything to them!”
“wow, daichi’s got skills with the ladies!” tanaka mused, noya trailing behind them. their arms were stacked full with all kinds of snacks.
he was definitely not paying for all of those.
KEI: academic rivals to lovers.
you worked at the library at the university you attended. tsukishima had seen you around campus a few times. yamaguchi would go as far as to describe you as tsukishima’s “campus crush”—which tsukki of course denied. he hardly even knew you.
but, this semester is when things finally got interesting. you had wound up taking the course tsukishima was the TA for.
you were currently bent down behind a bookshelf in the campus library, organizing the books that needed to be put away. you noticed a hand grab a book off your cart.
you stood up. “anything you need help finding?”
“no,” the man stated, blankly.
you examined the book in his hand. “wait. are you in psych 301? haven’t seen you in there before.”
“kei tsukishima. i’m the assistant in that class this semester.”
“oh! i’m y/n l/n. are you reading that book for fun then, or?”
“i know. i graded your last essay. something about the human consciousness or whatever,” he stated, pushing his glasses to the bridge of his nose.
your face went hot. “oh? so you were the one that gave me a B- on that. that was the best paper i’ve written all semester!”
“yeah, only because you can’t write any better ones. and maybe actually read the syllabus before you join the class,” he deadpanned.
“okay, mr. know-it-all. and for what it’s worth, i did in fact read the syllabus.”
“well if you actually paid attention, then you’d know this book was meant to be read alongside the other materials.”
wait. what?
before you could say another word, he placed the book back down in the cart. “my email is on the syllabus if you’d actually care to read it. good luck actually passing the class.”
you were so going to find that syllabus. and you were definitely doing to pass that class.
KEISHIN: second chance.
stepping foot into sakanoshita after years felt like a dream. but seeing keishin, your high school boyfriend, sitting there behind the counter, was what really sent you back.
“keishin?”
ukai actually took the time to look up form his magazine, and he was glad he did. “y/n?”
“keishin!” you smiled. “i didn’t realize you family still owned the place!”
he stood up form his seat behind the counter. “yeah! work here part-time, coach volleyball the other half.
“you coach volleyball? does the old ukai not coach anyone then?”
“nah, old man retired last year. still coaches a few younger kids on the side. but, hey, how have you been? it’s been years since i last saw you in miyagi. 4? 5, maybe?”
“yeah,” you sighed. “it’s definitely been awhile. but life has been great in tokyo. my internship finally ended and so i’m back here for the next month or two!”
“really? you got to let me take you out sometime—drinks, to celebrate.”
you felt the slight rush of heat to your cheeks. “r-right! of course!”
“hey, if you wanted, we close in less than an hour. you could wait here till then, catch up, then let me take you out for drinks.”
“alright,” you smiled, taking a seat behind the counter next to ukai. “tell me about your team then. where do you coach? karasuno?”
you felt like you were 16 all over again. just him and you.
ATSUMU: opposites attract.
you were the promotional manager for the msby black jackals. everyone on the team loved you—yes, even sakusa. though he wouldn’t admit it. but, atsumu being the sly guy he is, took every opportunity to flirt with you. of course, keeping things professional, you shut him down every chance you got. plus, it would never work. ever. you knew that.
he was childish, you were mature—top of your office only a few months in. he was selfish half the time, and he’d always describe you as one of the most thoughtful people he’s ever met. he was confident and bold. you were quiet and reserved, at least time him. so when you find yourself alone with him at the gym one night late after practice, going through your binder of advertising ideas, you didn’t know what to make of it. the way you could feel he eyes focused on you and only you drove you insane.
you finally took a break form your rant about new promotional ideas for the team, leaving a heavy silence between the two of you.
“y/n?” he finally said, breaking for silence.
“yeah, atsumu?” you respond, not looking up form your binder.
“you should let me take ‘ya out. i mean it.”
you quietly gasped to yourself.
sure, atsumu had made pass after pass at you every day for the last few months since you started working with the team. but, this time, he sounded so.. genuine.
what’s even worse is you couldn’t help yourself from the words the escape your lips in the last moment.
“okay.”
© fum1ku 2024.
⁂ taglist: @chloiyoomi @eashn + let me know if you want to be added! 💌
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saerins · 5 months ago
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ᯓ ᝰ RIGHT HERE .ᐟ — touya todoroki
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touya x female reader. content tags modern au, childhood sweetheart!touya, both are working adults, making out, mentions of infidelity/murder, he’s a tease. word count 1.7k
ᯓ notes .ᐟ haha can you tell i love touya too much rn ? just getting back into writing so have some of my touya :) thanks to any of you who read this <3
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“touya, you’re gonna make me late for work tomorrow,” you whine, pouting as he wins you in yet another round of super smash bros. (and hence you’d have to stay up and continue playing at his behest.)
beside you, touya smirks, rows of pearly white visible while he clearly enjoys tormenting you. “weren’t you the one who said you needed a distraction?”
you grumble as you take the couch pillow and hold it over your face, groaning in frustration. touya’s right; you’d called him right after dinner, practically forced him to come after you figured out that you’re actually not as strong you thought and you’re actually still really upset that your ex cheated on you.
it’s only pathetic because it’s already been a couple of months and you’re still wallowing over it somehow.
“you know, i bet all that frustration will go away if you just let me kill that fucker,” touya tells you, flicking your forehead as leans forward, yanking the cushion off your face.
unamused, you deadpan at him. “yeah? then what am i gonna do when you’re in jail, huh?”
touya snickers, “aww, what? can’t handle being without me?”
in a strange way, your honest answer is definitely not. you’ve known touya forever. ever since you were five and your families connected at a preschool event. ever since your friend fuyumi introduced you to her brother. ever since touya confided in you how much he hated his father.
fast forward more than a decade later and you’re both sitting in your apartment, in a different state than either of your families, still as close as you were when you were kids.
you glare at touya, rolling your eyes before scrunching your nose and smirking at him. “actually, go ahead, i’ll go find myself a better guy while you rot in the cell.”
your best friend scoffs, cocking a brow and looking like he’s offended. “i off someone for you and you don’t marry me immediately? the fuck is wrong with you?”
the shit-eating grin that dawns on his face immediately after makes your heart skip a beat. yeah, you’ve always found him attractive, maybe even had a crush on him back in high school, but he’d always had girls after girls, and somewhere along the way you learned to stuff those flimsy emotions back down.
until you remember that he’s been single for a while now, and the fact that you’re both working adults with all the freedom in the world.
fuck, you really shouldn’t go back there.
“haha, funny,” you try to wave it off sarcastically. “says the one who told his ex that he just sees me as a little sister.”
he laughs, leaning back against the couch, a hand behind his head, abs sticking out from the edge of his shirt. it takes you a second to rein yourself in, not wanting to get teased relentlessly by him if you get caught staring.
“hey, she was getting jealous of me spending so much time with you! what was i supposed to say?”
yes, you’re aware. most of them were. most of the time you never told touya about any of that; of how his girlfriends were coming up to you, all insecure about your friendship and asking if you could back off. that was the most common thing among all his relationships: the girls’ pleas for you to keep a distance.
you did… the first few times.
and after his fifth relationship, you realised that touya would always pull you back close. would always end up breaking up with them if your friendship is causing them too much worry.
“you didn’t have to say anything, maybe you should’ve just kept your distance, you know? since most of them seemed to have a problem with it,” you comment, trying to act as nonchalant as possible, though even you don’t believe yourself.
a life without touya is unimaginable for you. even if you can’t really say the same for him.
touya sighs, shifting in his position before ultimately putting an arm around you, pulling you close. he smells like your soap and his hair against your face tickles.
he’s always like this; always touchy, always close. recently he’s been more than usual, coming over and sleeping the night (you never did anything physical!), chasing other guys away at the club because they’re not good enough for you.
and when he’s like that, you think maybe there’s no harm in letting those long-lost feelings flow back.
it’s dangerous.
he’s always like this. always way too much for you to handle. and yet you can’t live without him.
and then he does something he’s never done before.
you feel his lips on your temple, and you hear the chuckle reverberating from his throat. his left arm around you holds you tight, not that you’re running anywhere—you’re pretty sure you’re frozen stiff from the shock.
did that really happen?
“how can i do that when you’re the only one i want?”
you’re sure that’s his voice. it can’t be anyone else’s. but you’re not sure if you believe him. is he really saying what you think he’s saying?
slowly, you turn to face him, expecting him to wear that smug grin and tease you for being so gullible but it never comes. instead, you’re greeted with his half-lidded eyes, blue pupils staring at your lips like he’s hypnotised, his thumb caressing your lower lip from left to right like he’s trying to memorise all the grooves.
it’s so soft that you barely recognise your own voice when it comes, “touya, kiss me.”
and maybe he’s always wanted to, because he doesn’t miss a beat. the second you open your mouth, he’s giving you what you asked for, his tongue prying your lips open and he tastes just like the warm in winter mornings, like the comfort people always dream about.
mint. you can taste the sweet from when he ate it right before he beat you in the game. you can feel the cold on the tip of your nose from when you brush against the piercings on his nostrils. you can feel him carry you onto his lap, feel his hands wrapping around your waist. you can feel his heartbeat under his chest, under your palm, almost as erratic as your own.
were you really just upset over someone else?
every relationship you’d been sad over suddenly didn’t seem to make sense anymore. not when touya’s right here, lips locked with yours and telling you more with his kiss than you’ve ever heard from his words.
by the time you pull away, both of you are breathless, his hand on your cheek, lips softly brushing over your own like he can’t bear to be away even for just a second. you can’t bring yourself to open your eyes, half overwhelmed and half confused.
“fuck, did we really just—”
“shh,” you hush him, putting a finger on his lips, suddenly embarrassed. your foreheads are still pressed together, and you can’t see it but he’s admiring your face, holding himself back from just kissing you even more.
touya moves your finger away. he whispers your name in the most gentle tone you’ve ever heard, “does that mean you feel the same?”
you swallow the lump in your throat, tongue-tied and still straddling your best friend on the couch. you’re just a single impulsive action away from going all the way.
dangerous.
pulling back even further, you’re about to make a break for your bedroom when touya pulls you back, making sure you face him.
“no running this time,” he tells you, voice raspy and his eyes flicking from your eyes to your nose and your lips but mostly your lips. “i want you,” he whispers, and the minute you lock gazes, the answer has never been more clear to you.
“i want you too, touya,” you answer, both excited and afraid but he never lets you harp on things too much because he’s already kissing you silly, barely letting you breathe—you don’t have to guess with him; he wants you so desperately you can feel it in his actions.
“touya, we should stop,” you whine, knowing that this might be going way too quick yet you want it all the same.
touya shakes his head, big hands slipping under your shirt and squeezing your waist. “no, don’t wanna stop,” he whispers into your mouth.
he’s about to pull your shirt over your head when the loud shrill of his phone interrupts. he would’ve tossed it to the side if you hadn’t taken it and insisted he should take it. it’s from shoto, after all. (he doesn’t call often, it’s a complicated relationship.)
grumbling, touya leans back, keeping your thighs in place so you can’t move away. he’s smirking at you as he answers, “shoto, what is it?”
you can’t hear his brother over the phone. you can only guess snippets of the conversation from touya’s end.
“huh.”
“what for?”
“you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.”
“yeah, yeah, whatever.”
when he finally puts it down, he pulls you close by the chin, a glint of mischief in his grin. “get ready, doll.”
“huh? for what?”
touya gives you a peck on the lips. “family’s visiting, a surprise or whatever. they’re already in the city.”
you blink, praying he’s not being serious and wishing it’s not what you’re thinking. “okay, have fun!”
“and where do you think you’re going?” touya laughs, pulling you back down after you barely got back up.
“go spend some time with them, it’ll be fun.”
“oh i’m sure it’ll be fun,” he smirks, typing something into his phone and sending the message before you can sneak a peek.
you’re almost too scared to ask. but you do. “and why’s that?”
touya chuckles, thinking you’re way too stubborn, playing dumb even if it’ll kill you. but he guesses it’s fine if he has to spell it out for you. “because i wanna re-introduce you.”
“wait, what do you mean?”
with a gentle smile and a poke on your forehead, he looks you in the eyes. “i’m gonna introduce them to my future wife.”
853 notes · View notes
afterglowsainz · 2 months ago
Text
snap out of it | pepe marti
pairing: reader x pepe marti, reader x bf!franco colapinto
summary: pepe has the biggest crush on you, but you’re too into franco to notice
fc: blanca soler
request: here
a/n: for the franco girlies, i’ll write a solo franco fic soon i promise, for the pepe girlies, i’m sorry <3
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liked by pepemartiofficial, francolapinto and others
yourusername somewhere in northern italy… 🧚🏼‍♀️
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username they’re the cutest couple 💍
username best f2 wag frrr
username what does it feel to live my dream 😭
username she’s serving so much face is insane
username back to the franco boyfriend material pics let’s gooo
username bestie wake up! y/n posted franco in a photo dump again!
username my favorites 💗
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liked by yourusername, francolapinto and others
f1 BREAKING: Franco Colapinto to race the remainder of the 2024 season replacing Logan Sargeant for Williams Racing
tagged francolapinto and williamsracing
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username omg what
username this is insaneeee
username so happy for him! 💙
username ohhh i don’t know much about him but hopefully he’ll do good this season
yourusername OMG LETS FUCKING GOOOOO🔥🔥
username someone needs to pr train y/n ASAP 😭
username so happy to see more young drivers getting into f1
francolapinto 💙💙💙
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yourusername not much going on, just my boyfriends last race in formula 2 before jumping to f1 and pepe’s masterclass of a driving
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username y/n back at the paddock omg i manifested this
username omg she’s hanging out with pepe again we’re sooo back
username i missed their friendship 😩
username same!
babickovaela prettiest girl 💗
yourusername that’s you 🫵🏽
username posted pepe in a photo dump AND praised him in the caption? ohhhh were so back
username no fr since she started dating franco they haven’t been together as much 😔
username maybe cause she has a boyfriend now??? idk priorities change when you start dating someone🤷🏽‍♀️
francolapinto ❤️ (liked by yourusername)
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francolapinto first formula 1 weekend: check ✅
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username such a great drive!
username not bad for a rookie 😎
landonorris great drive mate! keep it up👊🏽 (liked by francolapinto)
username congratulations franco 🇦🇷
username can’t wait to see more of him!
yourusername YOU DID SO GOOD
yourusername i’m so proud of you❤️
francolapinto love you💙
username when i go to a franco’s number 1 supporter competition and my opponents are lando and y/n
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yourusername dinner nights🍷 (featuring saucy🌭)
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username ohhh i didn’t know franco was dating a baddie
username a face people would go to war for
username SAUCY <3
username i fear i’m no longer in love with franco but with y/n
username so so gorgeous it’s unreal
francolapinto demasiado hermosa❤️‍🩹 (too beautiful)
yourusername ❤️
username 👆🏽this is too cute but i miss her interactions with pepe
username no cause are they even still friends? they don’t interact with each other anymore 😔
usernameno fr bring back the pepey/n friendship!
pepemartiofficial’s instagram stories
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[caption 1: 🥳] [caption 2: 🍾🍾🍾]
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francolapinto always a lovely time in baku 🇦🇿 the place for lovebombing and space❤️‍🩹
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insanechayne · 10 months ago
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~ ~ ~
#yeah ok I’ll take the hint here#I know you’re too much of a coward to just speak up for yourself and just use silence to convey your meanings#despite the fact that silence is not a useful hint and is simply rude and hurtful to continuously use#especially when I’ve told you several times that silence really affects me and I’m not good at picking up ‘subtle’ hints#ive said over and over that you should just be straight up with me and tell me things honestly#I don’t know why I expect so much from someone who lied to me so much over the course of our friendship#someone who disregards my feelings in most cases and usually doesn’t want to hear what I have to say unless it’s just simple easy nonsense#you’ve never cared how you’ve hurt me or how you continue to do so#and it just sucks that lately I can’t even rely on you to speak to me when you reasonably should be able to#it takes you five hours to sweep/mop a room? or do a workout? when you’re still mostly snowed in and are stuck at home anyway?#was it just because I dared to show some of my feelings to you today? crossed a line and made you uncomfortable with my pain#my fucking mistake sir I guess I’ll correct it by feeling nothing ever again#actually I wish that could happen because I’m tired of being upset over you all the time#I was already having a not great day with very little sleep and some anxiety issues this morning#would have been nice of you to show me even a little compassion for once#guess that’s the real fantasy here huh#personal
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runninriot · 3 months ago
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keep your pretty face out of trouble
written for @steddieangstyaugust day 20
prompt: "I didn't know where else to go." | rated: T | wc: 2.596 | cw: mentions of blood, injuries, homophobia | tags: Steve Harrington is a mess, and so is his face, Eddie Munson has a crush on Steve Harrington, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Friends to Lovers | also on ao3
Eddie didn’t really know what to expect when he entered the Henderson’s home. Dustin had been quite vague on the phone, didn’t say much at all to be honest, nothing of substance at least. Nothing that could’ve prepared Eddie for what he finds when he steps into the living room where, next to his little pal, he finds none other than Steve Harrington sitting on the couch.
And as if that isn’t confusing enough, what’s really concerning is the way he looks.
His face is fucked. Beaten, bruised, mush. There is blood on his lower lip and dripping out from his nose into a tissue that’s already soaked.
Dustin is sitting by his side, holding what seems to be a bag of frozen peas against the older boy’s neck.
   “Dustin, what the fu-“
He doesn’t get to finish his question because Steve suddenly looks up, eyes wide in shock like he’s just now becoming aware of Eddie’s presence, before turning to Dustin with an expression that isn’t at all hard to read.
    What’s he doing here?
Dustin lets go of the frozen goods in order to hold both hands up defensively.
   “Hey, don’t look at me like that! I didn’t know what to do, so I called Eddie.”
   “You shouldn’t have done that. I’m fine.”
   “You are very clearly not fine, Steve!”
They’re doing this weird but kinda adorable staring competition they often do when they’re arguing and it would be amusing to watch if it weren’t for whatever the fuck is going on with Steve’s face.
Dustin doesn’t waver, holds Steve’s disapproving gaze seemingly unimpressed but Eddie could hear the tremble in his voice, knows Dustin is only barely keeping it together.
Always trying to keep up a brave face, Dustin is, but Eddie knows his vulnerable side, too. Maybe that’s why Dustin called him instead of Wheeler or any of the other Gremlins when Steve- what? Appeared on his doorstep all beat-up? Or where they out together when it happened? Is Dustin hurt, too?
Eddie shakes himself out of his thoughts, lets his eyes wander between the two, both hands on his hips like he’s seen Steve do whenever he’s trying to make a point.
   “Alright, enough! Can someone please tell me what happened?” Eddie asks as he steps closer, watching Steve’s shoulders tense immediately.
   “I told you, I’m fine. I just- I didn’t know where else to go! Robin’s not home and-”
Okay, ouch! Eddie feels slightly offended. Steve could’ve come to him instead of-
Nevermind. There are bigger problems at hand.
   “It was stupid, I’m sorry. I’ll be out of your hair.”
Steve makes an attempt to stand up but his body betrays him as soon as he’s on his feet, swaying slightly into Eddie’s direction, who catches him instinctively, steadies him with a hand on his arm.
   “Woah there, big boy! You’re gonna sit your ass back down for me, okay?”
Eddie can sense that Steve wants to put up a fight but thankfully, he doesn’t. Instead, he lets Eddie guide him back down.
   “Some assholes did this to him,” Dustin finally says. “I don’t know who but Steve said he got into a fight.”
   “I only came here because it was closer than my place,” Steve grumbles, obviously regretting his decision now.
   “You scared the shit out of me, Steve! So I called Eddie because- well, I don’t know. I thought maybe he could help talk some sense into you. You need to go to the hospital! Or a doctor, I don’t care but someone’s gotta take care of that.” Dustin says, pointing at the mess that is Steve’s face.
   “I don’t need a doctor. I’m fine, really. See, it already stopped bleeding.”
Steve retrieves the once-white-now-red tissue to prove that the bleeding has stopped, which it has. But Eddie can see in Dustin’s eyes that the boy is still not convinced enough to let him off the hook.
   “Let me have a look?” Eddie gently takes hold of Steve’s chin to tilt his head up, feels his courage falter for a split-second when Steve’s pupils suddenly dilate and he can see by the bob of his Adam’s apple, that he has to swallow down hard.
    God, even with his face bloody and bruised Steve is fucking gorgeous. It’s really not fair, if you asked Eddie. That guy is beyond anything he could ever wish to-
    No, no. Focus, Munson.
   “Let’s see if we gotta be worried about your pretty face being blemished by a broken nose, ey?” Eddie jokes just to cover his own nervousness.
   “How would you know if it’s broken? You’re not a doctor.” Dustin protests, rightfully sceptical about Eddie’s ability to come up with a valid diagnosis.
   “Ah, see, when you’ve had your nose broken several times, you kinda know what to look for,” Eddie replies nonchalantly as he examines the swelling around Steve’s nose, ignoring the sad, kind of pitying look in Steve’s eyes at his statement.
   “I think you’re good, Harrington. Still straight and beautiful as ever. It’ll hurt for a few days but you’ll live,” Eddie says with a wink, hesitating to let go of his face even if there’s no need to hold him still anymore.
For a moment, their eyes are locked in on each other, both staring wide-eyed and kind of lost in some spellbound haze that makes it impossible for either of them to look away.
Unfortunately – or rather, lucky for him – Dustin’s voice breaks through the static crackling in Eddie’s ears and brings him back to reality.
   “I don’t know Eddie. Are you sure it’s not broken?”
Eddie finally lets go of Steve, not without an instant feeling of regret at the loss of contact, and turns to the younger boy.
   “I’m sure, Dusty. Believe me, when you’ve been beat up as often as I have, you quickly learn to know the difference between injuries that’ll hurt like a bitch but are otherwise harmless, and injuries that need medical attention.”
It does look worse than it is, thankfully. And with a bit of ice and some rest, Steve will be back on his feet in no time.
This, however, brings Eddie back to wondering what even got Steve in the state he’s currently in.
   “Wanna tell me who did this? What happened?”
Steve looks down at his hands, fumbling with an invisible thread on his neat jeans.
   “I, uh- got into a fight with some guys because they were talking shit about, uh-“
His eyes dart up to Eddie, just for the flicker of a moment, looking almost ashamed with that light blush creeping up from his cheeks to his ears, before he finds his voice again.
“About someone I care a lot about. They were being mean, called them some disgusting shit, made assumptions about them without knowing them. They-“ Steve looks at Dustin, obviously contemplating whether to say out loud what’s on his mind.
   “They said these things like, how someone should teach them a lesson. To, uh, to set them straight.”
Steve swallows thickly, and the shuddering inhale tells Eddie that he’s trying his best not to break. That whatever it is he’s trying to say really gets to him.
Eddie is confused; he has a feeling that there’s more to Steve’s words. Like, maybe he doesn’t want to alert Dustin with the harsh reality of what they really meant.
    ‘Teach them a lesson’, the words echo in Eddie’s mind, ‘Set them straight.’
And suddenly, it dawns on him.
Suddenly, he understands what Steve is trying to say.
Did they- this is about Robin, right? Steve said they were talking shit about someone he cares a lot about.
Did these fuckers, whoever they might be, threaten to harm her for being... a lesbian? Is that it? It must be, right? It’s the only thing that makes sense, would explain why he’s all choked-up about it because everyone knows how deep their friendship is. How much Steve cares for Robin.
Fucking small-minded small-town dickheads and their outdated view on how things should be. God, Eddie hates it. Hates everything about them being stuck in a town where people still have to be afraid of openly showing who they are and who they love.
It’s why he never had a relationship. Why he flees to Indy and beyond on the weekends, whenever he’s desperate enough. He’ll never find love as long as he’s stuck here – for multiple reasons.
Robin is so much braver than him. Said fuck it a few weeks ago when she finally found the courage to ask out that girl she’s had a crush on forever. It was the talk of town the next day – ‘Did you hear that? Someone saw that Buckley girl kiss another girl! Can you believe that? What a disgrace. Displaying this filthy behaviour without any shame.’
Fucking assholes.
Thankfully, like with most gossip, people eventually lost interest and moved on to whatever next thing it was they found to deflect from their own miserable lives. But the damage had already been done. Ever since, Robin has been walking around with a big, fat, neon sign on her forehead, saying ‘I’m queer and proud’ – which should be liberating, a cause for celebration, but it’s not.
Not here, anyway.
   “Eddie?”
The warmth of Steve’s palm on his arm brings him back.
   “Huh? What? What is it?”
   “You, uh... kinda zoned out there for a moment. Are you okay?”
This startles a laugh out of him. Of course, Steve would ask him if he’s okay, when he’s the one with a swollen face. Typical.
   “Yeah, sorry. It’s just- tell me who.”
   “What?”
   “Who where those guys. I’m feeling petty and I haven’t been in a fight for a while.”
Eddie wiggles his brows at Steve and grins, makes it sound like a joke. But Steve must see the rage in his eyes, must sense that he means it because there’s suddenly so much worry in his eyes, the kind of honest concern that makes Eddie’s heart melt.
   “I don’t- No, Eddie. I won’t tell you. You need to stay away from those guys! That’s what they’d want and I don’t want anything to happen to you!”
Steve seems frantic, like the mere thought of Eddie getting into a fight with them is making him panic.
But why would he-
      “They’re a bunch of assholes! And I told them, if they ever dare to lay a hand on you, they’ll wish they’d finish what they started today. I will not let some intolerant bigots hurt you!”
    Oh.
This has never been about Robin, has it?
They’ve been talking shit about Eddie.
And Steve-
   “Why would you get into a fight over me?!”
Eddie jumps off the sofa, both hands in his hair, tugging roughly at his own curls.
   “What do you mean? Why wouldn’t I?” Steve replies sounding perplexed. “I care about you, Eddie! And it’s not okay that these- these fuckers think that only because you’re- only because you are who you are, it’s okay to treat you like that. Doesn’t matter if it’s behind your back or to your face!”
Steve takes a deep breath trying to calm his voice.
“To say shit like they’re going to do- bad things to you? How can I stand there and listen to that and do nothing?”
This is too much for Eddie. It’s too much for so many reasons, most of which he’s not ready to explain.
The worst and most important one, though, is that Steve’s face is covered in bruises because he was protecting Eddie. Steve got into a fight because someone threatened to hurt Eddie and in return, got hurt because of him.
   “Well, look where that got you! You don’t have to always be the hero, Steve.” It’s not meant as an insult, although it must sound like one.
“I’m used to people talking shit about me. I can live with that.”
Steve opens his mouth to say something but Eddie beats him to it.
   “What I can’t live with, is knowing that you could’ve gotten seriously injured because you were trying to defend me.”
Dustin stays uncharacteristically quiet the whole time, just alternates his gaze between Steve and Eddie, stunned into silence by whatever weird scene it is that’s unravelling before his eyes.
Eddie can’t blame him, can’t really wrap his head around any of it himself.
Why are they shouting? What are they even arguing about? And why the fuck is Steve suddenly so close? Why is he holding his hands? And why does he look at him like he-
   “Steve, I really appreciate you looking out for me, okay? But I can’t take it to see you get hurt. You’re face is too pretty to be covered in blood.”
Eddie huffs out a tentative laugh and to his relief, Steve does too, but not without rolling his eyes in fake annoyance at Eddie’s cheesy line.
   “Are you guys gonna make out now?”
They both turn around only to find Dustin standing there with a shit-eating grin on his face.
   “Because as much I love you, I think there are some things my innocent eyes do not have to see.”
   “Shut up you little shit!” Eddie scolds him but does so with a smile on his lips because-
Because Dustin might be onto something here. Or at least that’s what it feels like. Because Steve still hasn’t let go of his hands. And while Eddie is trying his best not to completely drown in Steve’s eyes by looking at Dustin instead, he can still feel Steve’s eyes on him.
And when he turns back, Steve has this fond, almost loving look on his face; an expression so soft not even the swollen nose or the dried blood can take away from the beauty of it.
Just for a moment, Eddie allows himself to dream. To wonder if maybe he can find love in this godforsaken town after all. Thinks, foolishly, that if Robin can have her happy ending, maybe he can, too.
   “For real, guys. The tension is killing me. Can you either speed this up or take it somewhere else because I can’t take it.”
   “Get used to it, shithead,” Steve says without looking at him, eyes still trained on Eddie.
   “Yeah, Dusty. Get used to it because I’m gonna be so annoying once your babysitter’s face is all healed up,” Eddie teasingly agrees, ignoring Dustin’s defeated sigh.
   “Does that mean you want to kiss me?” Steve asks a little breathless.
Eddie leans closer to him and whispers “Want nothing more. But I wouldn’t want our first kiss to hurt so it’s gotta wait. And you need to keep your pretty face out of trouble. Understood?”
He doesn’t know where this sudden rush of bravery is coming from but he takes it, needs it because-
   “I might be a little bit in love with you, Stevie. So I need you take better care of yourself, okay? I can’t let you get hurt.”
Somewhere in the room, Dustin is making fake gagging noises but Eddie’s focus is set on Steve who looks like he’s in trance, like he can’t believe what Eddie just told him.
   “I will, promise,” he finally says and sure, Eddie might have hoped for a little love confession in return for his own but he doesn’t need Steve to say it to know that this isn’t a one-sided crush.
And he’ll make damn sure Steve keeps his promise because he really wants that kiss as soon as possible.
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please please i’d like to request a carmy blurb with the dialogue prompt “Don't go on that date” ❤️
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Divine Timing.
carmy berzatto x female reader
warnings - cursing
written for my 5k celebration - post here, masterlist here. inbox here.
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He’s in a bad mood.
Technically, he’s always in a bad mood. But this is the worst you’ve seen him in a long time.
He’s screamed at Richie, belittled Marcus and pissed off Tina in the span of approximately five minutes, and everyone is tired. So, they enlist your help.
You speak fluent Carmy, Syd had said once. You’re the only one he listens to.
So, the next time he shouts, you shout back. Louder.
“Sydney, what the fuck are you doing?” he yells bitterly.
“Carmen, if you don’t stop fucking screaming, I’ll smack you so hard in front of everyone - I swear to fucking God.”
You yell back at a volume that shocks even Richie. The Beef stands still, everyone too afraid to move. Carmy is startled, stuck in place.
“We’re taking five,” you tell him, linking your fingers into his. “Come on.”
You drag him outside, sitting him down in his usual spot. You grab a water bottle and throw it at him, raising your eyebrows in a gesture that says drink it or else. He does as he’s told.
You let him wallow in the silence for a while, calming down slowly but surely. You look over, expecting to see him still angry, or frustrated. Instead, he just looks sad.
You move to sit next to him, turning your body so you can see his face clearly.
“What’s the matter, Carm? What’s got you so riled up today, hmm?”
“Nothin’” he replies, kicking his shoe into the ground. “Doesn’t matter.”
“Does matter. You can’t take your feelings out on everyone in the kitchen, you know. It isn’t fair.”
“I know.”
Your phone makes a noise, and you check the screen quickly before shoving it back in your pocket.
“Anyone important?”
“Nah. Just the guy I’m meant to be seeing later, checking in to see if I’m still good.”
Carmy tenses, whole body going rigid beside you. You feel it, brows furrowed in confusion.
“Listen, Carm. If you don’t wanna tell me what’s bothering you, then fine. But you’ve got to work it out in your own time - not in the fucking kitchen. Got it?”
He’s quiet for a moment, deep in thought. Finally, he speaks.
“Don’t go on that date.”
Your head whips around in disbelief.
“What?”
He ducks his head, willing the ground to swallow him whole.
“Don’t go on that date. Please.”
“Is that… is that what’s got you all upset?”
He scoffs and immediately regrets it, looking at you with softness in his eyes that’s rare as diamonds.
“Yeah.”
“Carmen… why?”
He takes a deep breath, gaze never leaving yours.
“It’s been eating me up, the idea of you going out with some guy. I wanted to tell you how I felt, but… I didn’t want it to be awkward, when you didn’t feel the same way. We work together, we see each other every day, and I didn’t wanna fuck up our friendship.”
“So… you took your anger out on everyone else?”
“Yeah, fuck. I didn’t mean to. Think I just bottled up my feelings too much.”
“Who says I don’t feel the same way?”
Carmy chokes on his breath, staring at you in disbelief.
“You… wait- what?”
“Anyone can see that I like you, Carm. I have since the day I met you and you flashed me one of those million dollar smiles of yours.”
He gives you one now, all bright and bashful.
“This is the last time anything like this happens, you hear me? From now on, you talk to me. And I’ll talk to you. It goes both ways.”
He nods, agreeing wholeheartedly.
“Here’s the deal, Berzatto. You go in there and apologise individually to each and every person you’ve been a dick towards today, and I’ll cancel my date with the douchebag I didn’t wanna see anyway.”
“And you’ll date me instead.”
You laugh, head thrown back and eyes crinkling.
“Fine. But only if the apologies are super heartfelt.”
He shakes his head, chuckling from deep within his chest. Wrapping an arm around your shoulders, he presses a kiss to your temple.
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For yelling at me back there. I needed it.”
You smile, leaning into him.
“You’re so welcome.”
“It was super hot, too.”
“Shut up, Berzatto,” you chide, but you can’t fight the grin that etches itself on your face.
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ham1lton · 6 months ago
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HE SAYS TO BE COOL (I DON’T KNOW HOW YET)
pairings: jenson button x maneater!reader.
warnings: large age gap - around twenty years. a lot of judgement and criticism as there is scrutiny of your relationship.
summary: after a party at a mutual friend’s, you and jenson are photographed leaving together. the large age gap causes concern especially after your admission that you had a crush on him as a young driver.
author’s note: so this is NOT a part of the main maneater storyline. this is just a what if scenario. just something indulgent for the maneaters out there who go for dilfs! last time i checked the friendship group poll, it was practically 50/50 so until that’s decided, there is a big group of all them. also as per usual, there is a poll at the end so please vote <3
— a part of the maneater series ꕤ
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liked by messybitch1, landonorris and 1,728,838 others.
ham1ltonshaderoom: after the release of lewis hamilton’s newest almave drink, formula one driver y/n l/n, better known as maneater, was seen outside of the event looking quite cozy with former formula one driver and forty-four year old jenson button. how are we feeling about this new power couple, ham1ltons?
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user1: poor lewis. his drink release has been completely overshadowed by this news 😭
user3: age gap couples never last long lol. good luck but he’ll move on to the next twenty something as soon as she shows one sign of aging.
user34: SHUT UP HES SO FINE 😭 i’d do the same as you y/n girl.
-> user51: LIKE 😭😭😭 bffr. most of the ppl here would fold for their older celeb crush.
user7: idk who’s benefiting more from this relationship? but it’s definitely not love.
user9: Y/N!!!! I’LL SAVE YOU!!!
user2: not jenson going through his mid-life crisis post-divorce. girl u can do better.
user8: maneater… pls say this is a publicity stunt.
-> user73: no cause this genuinely might be her ticking off her childhood crush list. which is real but idk if it’s good for her?
user6: is she fucking all the aging drivers? or is jenson the only one stupid enough to say yes?
user25: i support it. i met my husband when i was 21 and he was 37 and we have been together almost twenty years this may. not all age gap relationships are inherently bad.
-> user4: you’re a victim 😕
user12: y’all are gross. any of us would jump at a chance to date our celeb crush. jenson is hot and y/n is a consenting adult. she’s not a child anymore. she didn’t even know him as a child. bffr.
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liked by bestie2, georgerussell63 and 3,828,782 others.
yourusername: what do you do when you haven’t seen your besties for ages? do a photoshoot in the middle of the street. how did you spend your weekend?
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bestie1: we look so good!!! it was soo good to catch up babe. we missed u!!!
-> bestie2: we’ve all been so busy it’s insane how we’ve not been able to see each other more. i was going insane without my girls!!!
user1: is she not even gonna address it?!
-> user6: big ass elephant in the room.
user4: we knew how you spent your weekend ms l/n.
landonorris: am i not your bestie? why wasn’t i included?
-> georgerussell63: or me?!
-> alex_albon: or me? 🤨
-> logansargeant: or me?? 😕
-> oscarpiastri: i get why i wasn’t included tbf.
user10: u think posting pretty girls will make us forget ur weekend escapades? … maybe. keep posting.
user2: can you guys not make everything about a man? who cares if she’s dating jenson? what does that have to do with her ability to do her job or advocate for causes?! i feel sorry for her because you guys clearly dislike her for stupid reasons and are twisting this into a way to jump her ‘ethically’ which doesn’t even make sense. the only problematic thing she’s done is date a man older than her. grow up, my god.
*liked by landonorris, bestie1, bestie2, georgerussell63, oscarpiastri, alex_albon, logansargeant and 45,728 others. *
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liked by charles_leclerc, bestie1 and 1,092,728 others.
yourusername: italy, i love you ♥︎
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user3: get you a man that flies u out whenever ur sad.
-> user7: why are we not assuming she flew HIM out?
-> bestie2: he definitely flew her out. lmao.
user89: feels like a disaster waiting to happen lol.
-> logansargeant: not every relationship is like your parents. get therapy instead of projecting onto strangers.
user6: still a whore. i can’t stand this bitch.
-> oscarpiastri: stay mad! she’s young, successful and has many people who love and support her while you’re cursed to just scroll through her posts and seethe in your head. this one sided beef is crazy 🤣🤣!
user9: they’re cute!! idk how i’m the only one who thinks this.
user67: she’s still ugly.
-> alex_albon: looked at your pictures mate and cheers, my nan just vomited.
user12: when he leaves her >>>>
-> georgerussell63: 6.220.183.12
-> user3: NOT THE IP ADDRESS HELP?2&/&
user8: jenson. call me when you need a real woman.
-> bestie1: where is the real woman you speak of? she’s definitely NOT you.
user21: honestly? i just can’t get on board with this ship.
-> landonorris: you can’t even afford a ticket 🤣 delete this.
user10: i’m not saying shit cause why the y/n defense squad dragging people in the comments 😭
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liked by oscar.priv, alex.priv and 21 others.
maneater.priv: NEED HIM CARNALLY <3
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bestie1priv: thank god he doesn’t know about ur priv account. i think he’d combust.
-> maneater.priv: nah he giggles. he thinks its funny.
oscar.priv: everyone on a campaign to save you from jenson when they should be saving jenson from YOU!
bestie2priv: LOVE U BOTH <333 cutest couple!
lando.priv: dare you to post this on ur main 😏🤣😁😝
-> george.priv: 43.0.109.12
-> lando.priv: MAN COME ON 😭
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don’t want to miss out on my next post? join my taglist! if you enjoyed this, check out my masterlist or buy me a coffee! no pressure ! <3
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andvys · 9 months ago
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Dancing with our hands tied | S.H.
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Chapter three ⭐︎ So if you need to be mean, be mean to me
Warnings: angst angst angst! mean!Steve, bitchy!reader, slight allusions to unrequited love, mentions of Vecna and the upside down, argument, Steve being a dick to reader. and before anyone comes at me with the 'but your Steve is so ooc! he isn't mean anymore' this is a fic, this is enemies to lovers, you see the mean!Steve warnings, you know what you're getting yourself into.
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Summary: Steve had buried his past self, King Steve was dead, but all it took was a little push for him to make a small appearance again, to rain nothing but chaos upon his already weak 'friendship' with you. You pushed him, and you did it a little too hard.
Word count: 5k+
Author's note: Big big biggest shoutout to my bestie @hellfire--cult for helping me and writing those evil evil lines, you're the best
Series Masterlist ⭐︎ Previous Chapter ⭐︎ Next chapter
He regrets waking up that day.
He regrets saying yes to Robin and the kids to hang out.
He regrets picking up Max’s phone call. 
If he wouldn’t have done any of these things, he wouldn’t be where he is right now. 
Parked in front of your house so he can drive you both to Robin’s. 
It’s been a week since the day at his place, a week since you had stormed out of his house, a week since he had last seen you. It almost feels weird. He can’t even remember the last time he had gone without seeing you this long. If you’re not hanging out with the group, he sees you going into the coffee shop across from Family Video every afternoon. Sometimes you even run into each other at Bradley’s Big Buy, but since last Saturday, he hasn’t seen you anywhere – it’s almost as though you had disappeared. Maybe he would have worried if it wasn’t for Max and El gushing over your shopping trip to Indianapolis the other day, he panicked when they told him that, thinking that you were driving again when you still weren’t allowed to, but El had calmed him down, telling him that you used the train. 
With a sigh, he gets out of the car. He runs his fingers through his hair out of nervousness. He rings the doorbell and takes a step back, staring at the wooden door. 
How will you even react to seeing him here? 
You’re surely expecting Eddie, not him. 
The door opens after a moment, revealing you on the other side, looking as beautiful as always – unfortunately. You’re wearing a white top, the soft pink stripes matching the color of your glossy lips, your skin looking soft and glowy as the sun shines into your house, the fading bruises are almost all gone, finally. The scent of your perfume, something sweet and flowery invades his space, and he can’t help but inhale it, feeling warmth blooming in his chest. 
He takes you in, the way you look beneath the sun rays, the way your dainty necklace lies so prettily on your chest, the way your lashes touch your skin as you blink at him. 
The smile on your face instantly fades away when you lock eyes with him, the usual grumpy frown takes over instead, that pulls him back into reality. 
“The fuck are you doing here?” 
Yeah, you’re only pretty and cute when you keep your mouth shut. 
He clenches his jaw, trying not to show how annoyed he is already. 
“Picking you up.” 
You furrow your brows at him, “what? Where’s Eddie?” 
“He forgot about his Doctor’s appointment, he had to rush out. Max called me and told me to pick you up.” 
“Oh,” you nod and you stare at him for a long moment before a smile appears on your face, “she told you, huh?” 
Caught off guard by the smile on your face, he stays quiet, only nodding at your words. 
You chuckle to yourself, turning away from him to pick up your jacket and your keys. Surprising him by not fighting him, you step out of the house and close the door. You look him up and down, eying the keys in his hand. 
“Can I drive your car?” You ask, tilting your head, “I promise I’ll take better care of it than you ever could.”
He snorts at your words, looking at you with an expression that almost makes you laugh. 
“With that head injury? Yeah, not a fucking chance, Blondie.” 
Rolling your eyes, you brush past him, already making your way over to his car. 
“It’s been like what… a month? I’m all healed, I’m feeling peachy.” 
“A month and you still get dizzy and don’t even lie about it.”
Once again, you keep quiet instead of throwing a smartass remark back, it makes him furrow his brows at you. Instead of opening the door, he leans his elbow on the roof of his car, looking over at you curiously. 
You open the door and put one foot in before you halt when you notice him staring. 
“What?” 
“Did you fall on your head or something?” 
You shake your head at him, scrunching your face up. 
“You’re not fighting me, are you feeling okay?” He smirks. 
Scoffing at his words, you flip him off before you get into the car without a single word. 
He taps his fingers against the car, looking up at the blue sky with a smirk that turns into a content smile, he thought the bickering would start the moment you opened that door. Maybe today won’t be so bad. 
Though when he gets into his car and he glances at you, you’re already staring back at him with that certain look in your eyes, the one that tells him everything he needs to know. Your eyes are glimmering with that smugness, the one that’s always there when you’re about to tease him with something that you know will annoy him. 
“Is Nancy gonna be there?” 
“Huh?”
You blink at him innocently as you fasten your seatbelt. 
“Nancy, is she gonna be there? You know, since you only get the chance to be around her during these group hangouts,” you smirk. 
He squints his eyes at you, biting back the bitter words that he was about to throw at you. He turns away and starts the car. 
He backs out of your driveway and without a single word, he starts driving. 
“Must suck being in love with someone who doesn’t feel the same, huh?” 
He stares at the road ahead, blankly. He could swear there was a hint of hurt in your voice. He doesn’t look at you, despite feeling your eyes on him, he doesn’t look and only grips the steering wheel tighter.
“But what would I know,” you snort and he hears you leaning back in the seat, the leather squeaking a little as you try to get more comfortable. 
Yeah, what would you know? He thinks. 
You’re cold and you’re mean – he is certain that there’s not a single trace of love in your heart. How you care that deeply for Max will always remain a mystery to him. 
“Are you a grandpa or something or where is the music!?” 
“You make enough music for us.”
He turns to you for a brief second, to see you scrunching up your face at him, shaking your head in confusion. 
“What’s that supposed to mean, Lego head?” 
“Your yapping and whining is enough for me.”
“Oh, so you’re saying my yapping and whining is music to your ears?” You smirk. “Just say that you love hearing my voice.”
“Shut up,” he murmurs, glaring at you. He clenches his jaw and flicks the button to turn on the music. 
Material Girl by Madonna starts playing and he instantly feels his heart dropping, his cheeks start glowing red – at least, that’s what it feels like. He grows flustered underneath your stare the moment you start laughing. 
“Oh wow, I knew you were a girly girl, Harrington.”
He changes the song, calming down when some Duran Duran song starts playing instead, but you are still laughing, and he can only groan in annoyance, pointing his finger at you, “shut up, Blondie.”
Your face only grows more amused, and this is where the teasing begins and the drive to Robin’s house becomes a torture for him and he practically starts counting down the second till he can finally get out of the car that he usually loves being in. 
He bites his tongue, not saying a single word while you yap away the way you always do. 
What a fool he was for thinking that this day could have been good, you manage to ruin every day of his. 
He can only stay quiet for so long. 
“Do you ever shut up or do I have to make you!?” 
That seems to shut you up. At least, for a moment. When he glances at you with angry eyes, he notices the smug look on your face that still didn’t stray away from you, not even after his words. 
“And how would you do that?” You ask, mockingly. 
He stares at your lips for a moment, clenching his jaw and gripping the gear stick tightly. He looks away as he turns left, pulling up in Robin’s driveway, he parks the car. 
“I have an idea or two,” he mumbles and gets out before you can question him. He almost thinks that his words have stunned you, when you take a moment longer to get out of the car, but when you do and your eyes meet his, you smirk again. 
He starts walking backwards, taking in the sight of you as you walk towards him. Your jeans hug your hips and your legs so perfectly that he begins to hate them. He almost feels ashamed for wanting to see them from the back. His eyes move up to your top, without intending to stare at your cleavage but he does.. and fuck, he hates how attracted his body is to you. 
“So cocky and for what?” You chuckle as you brush past him, not noticing his staring. 
Steve’s cheeks are red, his eyes instantly fall down to your butt when he turns around to follow you onto the porch. You move your hips and he has to clench his jaw.
It’s really a shame that he can’t stand you. 
You ring the doorbell and patiently wait for Robin to open, you don’t spare him a glance, you don’t even turn around to tease him any further, he doesn’t mind it though, it gives him the chance to keep looking at you. Your skin looks soft and he sometimes catches himself wondering what it would feel like to touch you, it’s glowing and he can’t help but ask himself whether it’s because of the body cream that you put on or if it’s just this pretty on it’s own – not that he ever imagines you putting lotion on your body after a shower, definitely not. 
“Oh great, you didn’t kill each other!” Robin’s voice pulls him out of his thoughts and he quickly looks away from you, clearing his throat. 
Robin grabs your hand and pulls you into her house, only throwing a glance over her shoulder at him, “come on in Dingus, you know the way.” 
“Yeah,” he mumbles as he walks in, watching the way his best friend pays more attention to you than to him. Not only did you nestle your way into his friend group, you had also seemingly nestled your way into Robin’s heart. He watches the friendship between you slowly blossoming and he can’t help but feel jealous of that. 
He stays back in the hallway for a moment, preparing for a long evening with you. 
He hears Robin talking your ear off already, Max and Lucas are in the kitchen too. But no one else is around. Nancy and Jonathan are on a date, he knows that, Jonathan gushed about it to Argyle before he left the other day and Steve couldn’t help but eavesdrop when he heard them talking about Nancy. The other teens are off doing god knows what. So much for the weekly group hangouts. 
He hears your laughter and he can’t help but roll his eyes. It’s not the kind of laugh that he ever gets, no, whenever you laugh with or at him, it’s like you’re mocking him or making fun of him – not that he cares, he does the same to you. It’s your thing. 
But for some reason it bothers him to hear and see you laughing like this with the others. 
You get along with Robin, you get along with Eddie, you get along with the teens – hell, you even get along with Nancy even though you glared daggers at each other that day at skull rock.
With him, you’re either grumpy and rude or you’re just a snappy smug brat – which seems to be the case today. 
Steve walks into the kitchen, putting on a smile to greet Max and Lucas with. 
“Hey,” Max mumbles grumpily, only shooting him a brief and very forced smile before she goes back to her deep conversation with you. 
Another grump, he thinks to himself. It’s not a surprise that the snappy teen likes you so much, you’re both the same person. 
Lucas greets him with a handshake and a friendly smile, something that two of the three girls in this room should learn. 
“Are you coming to my game next friday?” 
“Yeah, of course,” Steve nods. 
“You can bring her,” Lucas wiggles his brows at him, gesturing to you with a wink, “as a date,” he whispers.
Steve scrunches his face up, as though he is disgusted by the thought of it – like he wasn’t just checking you out on the porch. 
“You’re joking, right?” He mumbles as he looks over Lucas’s shoulder, glancing at you. 
“No,” Lucas crosses his arms over his chest, shaking his head, “you are awfully mean to her, which means that you must like her.” 
Steve’s eyes widen and he looks over at you again, in sheer panic, hoping that you didn’t just hear the ridiculous words that have left Lucas’s mouth. You’re too distracted by whatever story Max is telling you though, looking back and forth between her and Robin. 
He looks back at Lucas to see him staring smugly. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“Isn’t that what you said to Dustin when he asked you for girls advice?” He snorts, shaking his head once again, “‘the key with girls is acting like you don’t care’” Lucas mocks quietly, chuckling after that. 
Steve sighs, putting his hand on his hip, “he told you that?” 
Lucas leans closer, “he sure did,” he smirks as he turns his head to glance at you before her turns back around, “I remembered it the other day, and it had me thinking–”
“Alright,” Steve interrupts him, he places his hands on his shoulders, “stop that, Sinclair.”
Lucas laughs, eying the flustered look on Steve’s face, who shoots him another glare before he steps away. He clears his throat, looking at the kitchen island where Robin had already prepared all the snacks. 
He grabs two bowls, glancing back at Lucas, “help me carry the snacks over to the living room, man. These ladies are too busy gossiping,” he says, expecting you to turn around and throw a comment back at him, but you don’t. 
Robin squints her eyes, nodding at him, “don’t give us the sass, Dingus.”
Lucas chuckles at her, he walks over to the kitchen island, reaching for the bowl of sour gummies and the M&M’s, “when is Steve ever not sassy?” 
At that, you finally turn to face them, a smirk tugging at your lips, you don’t have to say anything to show him that you agree with Lucas. 
He only rolls his eyes at you, no further words needed as he leaves the kitchen, stepping into the living room with Lucas trailing behind.  
“Wow, you didn’t even say anything to her.”
Steve has to roll his eyes again, the teasing in his voice isn’t very subtle. He opens his mouth to speak when the doorbell rings and Lucas rushes out of the room before he can even move or say anything. 
“Well, look at what the cat dragged in,” Lucas says after opening the front door. 
“Found him on the side of the road.” Steve hears Eddie’s voice. 
“Oh you two are such jokesters. You think I’d miss out on game night?” Dustin’s voice sounds through the hallway. “What are we even playing?” 
Robin replies enthusiastically as she walks into the living room with Dustin by her side and Eddie tagging along, greeting Steve with a grin. 
“Oh boy, the board’s definitely getting flipped today,” Dustin laughs.
Steve raises his brows, “you mean you will flip the board?” 
Dustin tilts his head as he looks at his older friend, his smile turning into a playful frown, “hello to you too, Steve.” 
“Henderson.” 
Dustin claims the loveseat before anyone else can, slumping down with a grin on his face, he reaches for one of the sour gummies in the bowl. 
“What’s wrong? Did your phone date not go so well with your girlfriend?” Steve teases. 
“At least I have a girlfriend,” Dustin winks at him. 
As you walk into the room, Lucas faces Steve again, with a teasing grin, “what do you mean, he’s got one too, she’s right there.” 
Dustin gives him a funny look before he turns around with furrowed eyebrows, confusion flashing in his eyes before they widen and he turns back to look at a very unimpressed Steve. 
“What!? You two are dating?” He shrieks loud enough for you to freeze in your spot. 
Steve closes his eyes, shaking his head at him. 
“Huh?” 
Eddie rolls his eyes at Dustin, “Henderson, I think that Sinclair might have a little too much imagination over there.” 
Lucas only shrugs, still grinning. 
“You’re playing matchmaker with the wrong people,” Robin laughs, looking between you and Steve. 
“Absolutely,” Eddie chuckles, sitting down on the couch next to her. 
“Can we just play the game now?” You ask as both you and Max sit down on the ground in front of the board game that Robin had already put out. 
“Ooh, we’re playing Ludo?” Dustin asks. 
Everyone nods, everyone except for Robin. 
“What?” She chuckles, cupping her cheek as she looks around, “that’s Wahoo.”
“Huh?” You tilt your head at her, “Wahoo?” 
“That’s what the game is called,” Robin says, pointing to the board. 
Steve watches the way you shake your head in confusion, slightly pouting as you stare at her. Fuck… you almost look cute. 
As Eddie reaches for the dice, he throws it up in the air, catching it between two fingers, “this game is called Sorry! my friends,” he smirks, cockily. “We only need four players so who goes first?” 
Lucas, who starts scarving down the snacks, waves a hand at Eddie, “I’ll sit this round out,” he says with a mouthful of chips. 
“Don’t talk with food in your mouth!” Max rolls her eyes at him. 
“Red, Dustin, Robin and Steve go first,” Eddie says. “The master has spoken, now let the games begin,” he says in his deep voice. 
Steve rolls his eyes at him, “this isn’t D&D dude, we don’t need a master.”
“Still.”
“Okay!” Robin claps her hands together, “let’s play!”
And as the game started, everyone laughed, everyone was having fun, everyone was joking around, it was all lighthearted. Dustin was throwing tantrums in his team with Robin, while Eddie snickered. Robin was a loser, and she accepted that she sucked at this game, competing against a bunch of stubborn teens. She was the first to sit out and stop playing. Max and Lucas preferred to stay out after the first few rounds, amused by watching the gameplay. 
And then, Steve and you were outright competing as if it were a championship. Neither of you even noticed that it was only you two left, everyone else stopped playing a while ago, watching this intense competition instead. 
While you took it all with ease, teasing him with a few jabs here and there whenever he was losing against you, Steve took it all a little more seriously. Because the moment he lost against you more than once, the anger in him started rising – not because of the game, but because of the looks you were giving him, those smug and cocky looks, the comments that weren’t even that bad – but everything, everything about you was pissing him off this day. 
Your attitude this morning, your comments, your jabs, your arrogance, you’ve been getting on his nerves from the moment you got into his car. 
And right now, he can feel his chest heaving, burning in anger and frustration. 
His jaw is clenched, his eyes are hurting from the intense glares that you start giving each other. 
Neither of you feel the eyes of the others on you two, the nervous glances, the warning ones because everyone knows what will follow after this. 
You both want to win against the other so desperately and currently, it’s a tie between the two of you. He won three rounds, you won three rounds – this apparently will be the last one, this one will decide who will win this very meaningless, stupid game. 
But Robin can’t take it any longer, she can’t keep watching the two of you getting angrier each passing second, knowing that this round will only lead to another, and both you and Steve could sit here all night, because you are both stubborn brats when it comes to each other – as it seems. 
“Okay!” Robin throws her hands up, snatching the dice from Steve’s hand that he was just about to throw, “can you two stop? It’s a tie, move on!” 
You and Steve look away from one another, raising your heads to look at Robin who glares at the two of you. 
“We’ll finish and then we’re done!” 
Steve groans at your words. 
“No!” Robin shakes her head, “because one will win and the other won’t, and then it’s a fucking mess, so stop playing! You fought interdimensional monsters together, for fucks sake!”
“Right, that doesn’t mean anything.” Steve rolls his eyes before he looks back at you, only to see your face fall. 
He almost feels guilty. You risked your life out there, not only for Max and Lucas but also for him. 
“That doesn’t mean anything!? Well aren’t you fucking grateful, Harrington.”
“Everyone fought, not just you, don’t think you’re all high and mighty,” he mumbles through the anger that he is still feeling.
A part of him is begging to just move on and keep his mouth shut, but he is frustrated, not just because of the game, but because of you, every small comment from you reminds him of how much he can’t stand you. 
“Hey, hey, hey, break it up,” Eddie says as he gets up from the couch, raising his hands up as he takes in the hurt but angry look in your eyes. 
You shake your head, “no, no, let him keep going! I want to hear what this bastard with his hero complex has to say to me.” 
Eddie can see the way Steve is fuming, the way the anger in his eyes gets stronger and stronger. He stands up, moving closer to you as you get up as well. 
“You fought with us once. Once! And you think that makes you equal to us!? You have no idea what we all went through, you have no idea the people we lost along the way, you know nothing!” He snaps at you, ignoring the way you draw back as your eyes fill with something he can’t read. 
Max straightens up in her seat, already reaching for her crutches as her eyes widen, seeing the way your lips twitch as blink up at Steve. 
“Steve, stop!” 
If he wasn’t so angry, he would have heard the fear in Max’s voice, something that normally would’ve made him draw back in an instant. 
You glance at her, shaking your head, yet again. “No, Max, it’s okay.” You turn back to face him, looking into his eyes coldly – that’s the only look he knows, that’s the one he cannot stand. “What does Steve Harrington know about loss!?” 
Steve feels his gut twisting, he clenches his jaw but doesn’t answer your question, he keeps staring at you. 
“What? Mom and Dad left you the whole house to yourself, and you consider that loss!?” You frown, lifting your arm, you gesture to the people in the room. “I see Robin alive, I see Eddie alive, I see all of the kids alive, so who exactly did you fucking lose, Harrington?” 
Behind the anger and the emptiness in your eyes, is sadness and pain, something he can’t see through the haze that he is in, right now. All he sees is something, someone he hates, someone who acts like she knows everything, someone who does nothing but bring chaos and anger into his heart and into a friends group that is so sacred to him. 
He never felt this angry before, not even when he found Nancy with Jonathan, not even when she cheated on him and left, not during a single fight with his dad, nothing had ever made him feel such rage. 
“You are so fucking horrible!” He snaps at you, not caring about anything, right this second. Everyone in the room disappears, Dustin, Max and Lucas are no longer there, and neither are Robin and Eddie, it’s just you and him now. “I hate the fucking day we ran into you at Skull Rock! You are the most despicable and cold hearted bitch I’ve ever met! I would be surprised if you ever loved somebody!” 
He can’t see the shock or the pain that nestles into your features. 
He doesn’t even hear the gasps from the others in the room. 
“Steve!” Max yells, reminding him of the fact that she is there, that everyone else is here too. 
The girl almost falls over when she jumps up. Lucas stands up as well, steadying her before she can fall. They both look at you, both of them see the hurt in your eyes, the way you helplessly stare back at the guy that you risked your life for. 
Robin and Eddie stare at him in disbelief, not knowing the Steve that they are looking at, right now. 
All that Steve can see is red though. 
“No, Mayfield, let me fucking finish because she needs to understand how terrible she is.” He practically spits in your face, not tearing his eyes away from yours, at all. “I-I mean, don’t you ever ask yourself why you don’t have anyone? Why no one bothers to stick around because I’d be really surprised if someone did – even more, I would be surprised if anyone ever loved you at all. You’re not someone easy to fucking love, Blondie. Trust me on that.” 
And the moment those words fall from his lips, the room falls silent, dead silent. His heart stops racing and his skin runs cold. Suddenly, he is brought back into the room, the haze fleeting away more and more and he can now see clear again. 
And as he looks at you, really looks at you, his heart drops to his stomach and every trace of anger is gone, replaced by a guilt he had never felt before. 
Your eyes are filled with tears as you stare at him with nothing but pain, not a single trace of coldness in them, not a single trace of anger or indifference or even hate for the man in front of you. All he can see is pain, pain, pain.. Your tears are welling up more and more, threatening to spill down your cheeks. Your throat bobbed up and down, like you are trying to gulp down the ball of nerves and sobs threaten to fall from your lips. 
For a split second, he can see through you and he sees something there never was before – something that tells him that you would let him do this, until he’d get enough of hurting you, that you would let him break you, little by little. But, he had enough. 
You look down as your bottom lip starts to tremble. 
As he sees that, Steve feels like the most horrible person on the planet. Worse than his dad, worse than the monsters he had fought, worse than Vecna. 
What had prompted him to throw such awful and vile words at you? 
The guilt that takes over almost feels unbearable and the moment he wants to take back those words, to apologize, you are already gone. 
Lucas calls out to you, but the slamming of the front door is all he gets back. 
Before Steve can even look around the room, his back is slammed against the nearest wall and he is met by the sight of an angry Eddie, his eyes darker than ever, nose flaring as he grips the collars of his polo, pressing him harshly against the wall. 
“I would fucking punch you in the face right now, Harrington. Don’t forget who was the first person to jump into the water to save your ass!” He yells at him, giving him one final push that knocks the breath out of him before Eddie lets go and leaves to go after you. 
Steve looks down, closing his eyes as he takes a deep breath. 
“Steve… what the fuck?” Dustin mumbles, softly, staring at his older friend in disappointment. 
Robin looks around the room, before her eyes lock on Steve, she looks at him in confusion, not understanding where all of this came from. 
“Dingus.. what the hell was that? Why did you–”
“Everyone leave the room.” 
It’s Max’s voice that sounds through the room, awfully calm. So calm that it takes everyone aback. 
Lucas stares at his girlfriend, completely confused. 
All it takes is a single look from her though and he and Dustin scatter out of the room. Dustin pulls Robin along who protests at first but follows when she looks back at Max, who only shakes her head. 
It’s silent for a long minute, and Steve doesn’t know what to feel. 
“That was fucked up, Steve.” Max says. 
Steve pinches the bridge of his nose, fighting the tears that threaten to build up. 
Not only did he hurt you, something he never thought was even possible. He also showed his friends a side of him he wanted to keep buried. A side that surely makes them feel less safe around him now. 
“I-I know, I don’t.. I don’t know what’s gotten into me.” 
Max purses her lips, looking down at the ground to avoid eye contact. 
“She may not have been with us from the start, hell, I wasn’t either. It doesn’t mean that she didn’t experience it just the same. She may not have fought monsters, Steve. But the monsters have gotten to her without her knowing about them.” 
You fought monsters, you fought the bats off of him. 
He snaps his head up, staring at her with a frown on his face.  
“Max I–”
The redhead shakes her head, anger and disappointment still on her face. 
“I’m not the one you have to apologize to. I will not tell you her story, I’m not allowed to do that. But you are wrong, you are terribly wrong about everything you just said about her.” 
She reaches for her crutches, giving him one final look before she leaves the room. 
He stares at the ground with a gnawing feeling in his chest, hating himself more and more as the seconds go by. 
The look you gave him will haunt him for the rest of his life. 
How could he ruin everything in the span of a few minutes? 
How could he not see the hurt in your eyes after only the first words that he threw at you? 
How could he not see the vulnerable side of you? 
How was he so blinded by the act you had put on? 
He judged a book by its cover, just like King Steve had done in the past. There is no excuse. No fucking excuse for what he had done to you. 
taglist: @prettyboyeddiemunson @taintedcigs @mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @livosssblog
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pitviperofdoom · 2 months ago
Text
High School Time Travelers, Part 2
It's finally here! Follow up to this story.
***
“So. Spill. What the fuck is going on with you and Angelique?”
Raph fidgeted uncomfortably, and something within Erin roared out in protest at that. They were in her room, surrounded by her clutter and band posters and the stuff he kept at her house to keep his mom from throwing it away. He wasn’t supposed to be uncomfortable here.
Eventually, he took a deep breath. “I time-traveled last night.”
“I’m serious—”
“So am I,” he said wearily. “I woke up in a house I haven’t set foot in for years, across the hall from someone I promised myself I’d never talk to again. It happened, and if you’re stuck on that part then this conversation can’t continue.”
Erin got up and paced her room, kicking aside her backpack, nearly knocking over the guitar stand in the corner. “What the fuck.”
“That’s what I said.”
“What the fuck, Raph.”
“I didn’t mean to!”
The absurdity hit her instantly—he didn’t mean to time travel, as if they were talking about him forgetting his homework or getting in Monica Dillon’s way during passing period. She wanted to laugh.
But then she remembered some of the weird things Angelique had said—about friendships imploding, about college, about shit not mattering in high school, all with the easy certainty of experience.
“Prove it,” she said. “Can you do that thing where you predict what I’m about to say?”
“I’m not stuck in a time loop, dumbass, yesterday I was thirty-three!” Raph snapped. “I had to go through math class trying to pretend I still remembered my teacher’s name!”
“Okay, okay, Jesus.” Erin held up her hands placatingly. “There’s gotta be something.”
Raph sighed, rubbing his forehead. “I dunno. Anything meaningful and unchangeable I can remember won’t happen for a while, so if you’re willing to wait for the Trump presidency or the global pandemic, there’s that.”
“The what.”
“Wait, who’s president right now? It’s still Bush, right?”
Erin pulled a face.
“Next one’s Barack Obama, he’s gonna do two terms,” Raph informed her. “First black president.”
“Oh, huh. Cool,” Erin said faintly.
“Let’s see, what else, um… Balloon Boy? Has Balloon Boy happened yet?”
“No, what the fuck is Balloon Boy?”
Raph brightened. “Yeah, so at some point this family is gonna release like, a homemade weather balloon? Or something? And there’s gonna be this huge panic because they think their son is stuck inside it, but then it turns out he was fine and hiding in the basement the whole time and it was a hoax.”
“Okay, I’ll keep an eye out for that I guess?” Erin sat down again. “You’re seriously not fucking with me right now?”
“I mean, if you want, we could forget this conversation ever happened,” Raph offered. “Continue with our normal lives, while I keep under-reacting to devastating world events.”
“Christ, I don’t know.” Erin pressed her palms into her eyes. After a moment, she lifted her head again. “Wait a minute, we’re getting off track. What does this have to do with Angelique?”
Raph’s silence could not have been louder.
“Raph,” Erin said, a little desperately.
“First you have to promise you won’t be mad,” said Raph.
“Did you sleep with her in the—” Erin paused to do some arithmetic in her head. “—eighteen years between then and now?!”
“She’s my wife,” Raph blurted out.
Moments later, Erin’s mother knocked politely on the bedroom door. “Everything okay in there?” she asked. “That’s an awful lot of screaming for a Tuesday night.”
Erin continued howling into her pillow. “She’s fine, Mrs. Yokota!” Raph called. “We’re looking at—uh—creepypastas!”
“Creepy what?”
“Uh—crap, are they still called that?—like, ghost stories and stuff!”
Placated, she left them to it. Eventually Erin recovered enough to lie back and stare listlessly at the ceiling.
“Dude.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“What the fuck is your life?” Erin demanded. “How did that even happen?”
“We ran into each other at—so my friend Hazel got roped into being in their college roommate’s bridal party and dragged me along for moral support, and Angelique was in the same friend group but with like six degrees of separation from us,” Raph explained. “It took half the reception for her to recognize me because at that point I’d been on T for a few years, but the second she realized we went to the same high school she turned fishbelly-white, pulled me aside, and apologized for how much of a bitch she was back then. It was really awkward.”
Back then, he called it, even though for Erin it was still right now. “And you married her?”
“Like eight years later, yeah.” Raph ran his hand through his hair, not quite hiding the small smile that stole over his face. “She really turned over a new leaf.”
Erin was silent for a while, mulling over this new information, combining it with what she already had from that afternoon.
“Is your name still Raphael?” she asked. “She sounded really surprised about it. And I know you said you were just taking the name on a trial run, but you really seemed to like it. Not that there’s—you know,” she added. “I know that—just because I picked it, I knew you might not… you know. It’s fine, I was just wondering. If I should call you something else.”
“I did—I do like it,” Raph assured her. “But, uh, some stuff happened. My dad found me.”
Erin’s eyebrows shot upward. “Wait, really? What’d he have to say for himself?”
“That Mom ghosted him when she got pregnant because her side guy had more money.”
“Dude, fuck your mom.”
“Don’t fuck my mom, she’ll ghost you for money, weren’t you listening?”
Erin burst out snickering. “Fuck, sorry, this isn’t funny.”
“It will be in eighteen years,” Raph said with a wry smile. “Hindsight. Anyway, he found me in—he’s gonna find me in two years unless I reach out first. He’s a good guy. My stepmom’s pretty cool, too. And I have sisters? So that’s awesome. And yeah, he had this friend who passed away when he was younger, and he always wanted to name his son after him, but then Mom disappeared and he only ended up having daughters, so when he found me, it kind of worked out.” He hesitated. “I’m Damian. Damian Raphael Harker.”
“That’s such a cool name,” Erin sighed.
Raph—Damian—tilted his head back to grin at her. “Yours is cool, too.”
“Shut up,” she said fondly.
“No, seriously,” he said emphatically. “Your name is unspeakably cool.”
There was something odd in his tone, sticking up and catching like a loose nail. It bothered her, the same way something Angelique said earlier had bothered her.
“Hey, Ra—Damian?” Erin said cautiously. “Earlier, when Angelique sat down with us, she didn’t recognize me.”
“She does, don’t worry.”
“No, she didn’t,” Erin pressed. “It took her a second to realize who I was, and she stopped herself from saying why.”
Suddenly Damian looked deeply uncomfortable. “I, uh.”
She took a deep breath. “Was I dead in your time?”
“Wh-no! No no no no, of course not!” Damian looked horrified. “We played Pathfinder like last week, you’re not dead.”
“What’s Path—no, never mind. Something’s clearly up. If we just played whatever-that-is last week, and Angelique is your wife, then why didn’t she know who I was?”
“Uh…” Damian’s hands had worked their way deep into his sleeves. “You look different, that’s all. You kind of reinvented yourself in college.”
“Oh,” Erin said, momentarily relieved. Then— “Wait.”
“What?’
“Damian. You’d—” She hesitated. “If I was a guy, you’d tell me, right?’
“Oh my God,” Damian mumbled into his be-sweatered hands.
“Damian.”
“You’re... not...”
“You’d tell me, right?”
“See, I don’t know if I would!” Damian answered, in a strained high-pitched tone. “That’s—look. If you were a guy, that’s something you’d have to work out for yourself!”
“Damian, I swear to God.”
“I can’t crack your egg for you, that’s like violating the Prime Directive!”
Erin seized a pillow and started to buffet him with it. “You are such a nerd!”
“It’s your personal journey, you can’t use me to cheat!” Damian cackled, fending her off with a plush horse.
***
“Yeah I’ll get the banana split.” Angie bounced on the balls of her feet, eyes raking over the array of toppings. “Can you put caramel and chocolate sauce on it? And Heath bar pieces, chopped strawberries, and M&Ms.”
“Yeah, sure thing.”
It took all of her self-control not to press her nose against the glass as she watched them make it. Some small part of her balked at the sight of three huge scoops of ice cream and all the toppings, but she quieted it. She had a second shot at being a teenager, and that meant never taking her garbage disposal stomach and body made of rubber bands for granted ever again.
She hummed absently to herself, only to pause halfway through the tune. How did it go again? She tried repeating the first half, only to get stuck at the same spot. Oh, this was going to bug the crap out of her. It wasn’t like she could look it up, not when the song wouldn’t come out for almost ten years—
Her phone vibrated in her purse, and she checked it absentmindedly, zeroing in for a moment on the DAD displayed on the screen. After a moment, she put it back without answering. If it was that important, he could text.
Sure enough, her phone gave a short buzz. New text message—he hadn’t even bothered to leave a voicemail.
DADI need you to talk to your brother.
Angie checked her banana split’s progress with a glance, and replied.
lol why
DADHe’s not listening to me. We both know the courts favor the mother so if we’re going to beat her I need both of you on your A game.
Angie ground her teeth until her jaw creaked.
what do you need me to do
DADJust coach him on how to talk about her. You’re a smart lady, I know you can do it. He’s always getting scuffed up at practice, just have him say the bruises came from her. Throw in a drinking problem if you have to, just keep your stories straight.
why father dearest i’m surprised at youyou want me to lie under oath?
DADJust talk to him, will you? Keep your stories straight, don’t get too outlandish, and we’ll get out of this with everything we want. You’ll never have to hear the word no again, I promise.
ok daddy ill do my best!
DADGood girl. You’re the smartest girl I know. Smarter than your mom, smarter than her bitch lawyer. Love you!
“Order up!”
Angie brought her banana split to the table with the clearest view of the door. It took her a moment to decide how to begin, then nearly a full minute balancing equal parts ice cream, banana, and toppings in a single spoonful. She managed it in the end.
Mood lifted, she unlocked her phone again and made a call. “Heeeey, Anika.”
“Need I remind you that phone calls are billable,” her mother’s lawyer said dryly.
“Yeah, I’ll be quick, I have some incriminating text messages I think you’ll be interested in?”
The sound of rustling papers paused. “Go on…?”
“Dad just told me to lie to the judge,” Angie explained, twirling a thin ribbon of caramel around her spoon. “And to coach Eric to lie to the judge. I took screenshots.”
Anika cursed softly under her breath. “Thank you for telling me. Send them to your mom, okay? Thank you.”
“Yeah, no problem.”
The bell above the ice cream parlor door jingled, and Angie perked up as both Damian (Raph?) and Erin walked in. She waved them over, grinning when both pairs of eyes widened at her treat.
“That thing’s half the size of your head,” Erin pointed out.
“Sure is, you guys came just in time.” Angie nudged it across the table, along with the two extra spoons. “If we split it, I’ll have enough room for a milkshake chaser.”
“You’re a monster,” Damian said delightedly. “Oh shit, are those Heath bars?” He dug in without waiting for an answer.
“They’re peanut butter cups,” she said solemnly, once he’d taken a bite and could probably tell they weren’t. “I added them just to hurt you.” Damian rolled his eyes and dug his spoon back in.
Erin stared at her, probably still baffled by the gentle banter, but at least she looked more curious than infuriated, like instead of being suspicious she simply didn’t know what to make of Angie.
“So, you guys talked?” Angie asked carefully. “Are we… all good?”
“I think so,” Damian replied, shooting a cautious glance at Erin.
“You’re on thin ice,” Erin informed her as she helped herself to the chocolate scoop.
“Fair.” Angie didn’t remember Erin putting up quite as much of a fight, but then, it had been years when they’d reconnected before. This time around, it was still fresh.
“The ice cream helps,” Erin added, slightly muffled by the spoon in her mouth.
“Noted.” Angie paused, weighed her options, and shrugged. No harm no foul, probably. “Hey, you’re a musician, right?”
Erin swallowed. “Yeah, why?”
“And not just a performer, but you write music too, right?”
“Yeeaaah?” Erin squinted suspiciously. Beside her, Damian shot Angie a warning glare.
“If I give you half a tune, could you resolve it?”
Erin was staring at her like she’d grown a second head. “Probably.”
“Great!” Angie hummed the earworm from earlier. “How would the next part go?”
Erin repeated it to herself, nodding along. After a moment, she said, “Probably like—”
And sure enough, there it was. The rest of the chorus’s tune came rushing back to Angie’s memory, and she breathed a sigh of relief. 
“Thanks! That was driving me nuts.” Angie returned to her banana split, ignoring Damian’s growing scowl.
Later, when Erin was in the bathroom and  Angelique was standing in line to order her promised milkshake, Damian dug his elbow into her side. “You’re not as slick as you think you are,” he muttered.
“What?” Angie said innocently. “I didn’t give anything away.”
“You just taught her half the chorus of a song she’s eight years away from writing!”
“I’ve planted a seed,” Angie insisted. “I’ve created a stable time loop.”
“That is not what you did and you know it.” Damian pursed his lips, clearly trying to stay annoyed with her. “I barely avoided spoiling her transition, and that’s after she asked me to my face.”
Angie grinned. “So you haven’t told her she’s a genderfluid punk rocker yet?”
“No. Because she’s not a genderfluid punk rocker yet.”
“And now, when she becomes one,” Angie said with a smile, “she’s going to look back on this day and laugh.”
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