Tumgik
#and I think that alone is enough for him to not be a loser lol
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I think it is quite funny jc stans and their relentless tries in making jiang cheng good and likeable or going extreme lengths to prove "look wwx is bad too so it's all equal haha"
At the end of the day the text disproves everything they made up, they can blissfully accept and argue their deluded fanon to be true but it never will be. And I sleep well at night knowing that mxtx made him a loser miserable asshole and I had enough reading comprehension to know that.
Also I know jc stans seethe at the fact wwx is the ideal protagonist that he is cuz when you compare jc to wwx you truly see how big of loser jc is, how much lacking he is in comparison. Wwx is so abundant in positive traits, he is literally so good at everything except cooking and then there's jc who barely has any good traits. Their tries to paint wwx as morally grey make them look like absolute idiots cuz the narrative and the author disproves the claim. "Oh but I don't agree with the author" well your approval doesn't matter cuz in mdzs universe wwx's actions are justified and jc's aren't, also most of jc's actions are presented in a negative light anyways.
They try and make him less of a loser making stuff up like "best jiujiu" "best sect leader" "oh look jc knew/predicted everything abt wwx" "wwx is reckless and impulsive and jc is so level headed" and none of these mentioned claims are true and even when author says he is despised by women cuz of his rancid personality they are like "no she is joking ofc ofc" or "he is actually aroace" and don't even let me get started on how they want to pair him up with lan xichen or nie huaisang when in text neither of them cares about him and the fact jc himself is a homophobe and they do it just cuz they want him to not die alone pfft.
Jc stans so delusional, I bet mxtx finds them so funny, I mean how can someone be so bad at reading lol
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unrelatedsideblog · 4 months
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Honestly it's kinda funny how big part of the fandom believes in loser Sanji and rizzer Zoro as if Sanji didn't pulled 2 girls in his introduction Arc (in front of their dates too lol) and Zoro pulled 1 girl in entirity of the canon if I remember correctly
In Zoro's defence may be that he doesn't exactly try + baths once a week but still, canon lol
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saetoru · 1 year
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✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。the dictionary definition of a rich boy
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synopsis. that rich guy who won’t stop asking you out is your partner for this project—send help
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contents. pre dating rich boy! gojo, college! au, implications of a zenin being pushy on the first date, satoru being distraught you went on a date lol, pre relationship shenanigans with the cutest loser boy !!
word count. 3.8k (it’s literally all just him being a handful)
notes. thank you niku my most cherished gojo stan for comming this (and giving me the most ridiculous tip) i adore you so much :,) mwah 💋
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he’s late—gojo is late. in fact, he’s very late, by forty-five minutes and thirty-two seconds to be exact. you aren’t really the count-by-the-second type of person, but somehow when it comes to that irritating, smug, too-talkative brat that you’re stuck with…well, you can’t help but be petty and use the seconds against him too.
he shows up close to an hour after your agreed time, waltzing in with a grin on his face—and, oh, you should kill him. he has the audacity to send you a wink when he walks over, coming up to your table and pushing his sunglasses down his nose just a bit to look you in the eyes over the lenses. 
what kind of person wears sunglasses indoors? surely only the kind that are nothing but trouble.
“aw, you’re here already,” gojo hums, “that excited to see me?”
“you’re late,” you spit.
“am i? i could have sworn—”
“now it’ll get dark by the time we get through what we planned for today,” you glare. he looks enthused, positively delighted by the statement—it’s almost as if you’ve offered him candy. 
“well, then i’ll just have to walk you to your apartment,” he offers smoothly. 
what a jackass. of course, just as expected, he’s still attempting to worm his way into your personal life (and likely your pants) in the most obnoxious of ways. over your dead body, however, will you ever allow him to know where you live, let alone accompany you on the way. you value your sanity, and having a conversation with gojo satoru longer than you absolutely have to seems like the most efficient way to fry every nerve and brain cell you have left.
“absolutely not,” you grit, “you can call me an uber. you pay.”
“alright,” he nods, “i’ll get an uber for you. but i’ll need your number to make sure you made it home safe. otherwise, what kind of partner would i be?”
typically, any normal pair of partners are meant to exchange numbers for a project—it would be the easiest form of communication, and more importantly, you can spam call if gojo decides not to carry his weight instead of just hoping and praying he checks his socials. but you can’t let him have your number—he’s not trustworthy enough for that. the last thing you need is him bombarding you with texts, or worse: calls, in the middle of work and class. so instead, you strictly inform him that any and all communication will occur via social media.
he pouts at that—it’s a cute pout, you have to admit. it’s slightly dangerous, too, because had you not had the self-control you do, you might have caved. but then he lights up at the prospect of you adding him back on socials. 
i’ll get your number one of these days, he says confidently. his confidence is as aggravating as the way he clicks his pen in the middle of class. he still chooses to sit right beside you despite all the free and very available seats the entirety of the lecture hall has. 
but no, he insists on sitting right next to you—and you? well, you have to hope you don’t get charged with homicide by the end of every class from the constant clicking he makes you endure. despite all that, gojo is surprisingly smart, which means your project might not be so doomed. 
he’s annoyingly smart, actually—he never takes notes, and just when you think the professor has him cornered by asking him a question when he’s seemingly dozing off, he answers immediately with the correct answer. 
you hate him.
“absolutely not happening,” you grumble, opening your laptop, “anyway i think we should start with—”
“well, i hate to inform you,” he sighs sadly as if it genuinely pains him to say this, “but i’ve actually deleted all my socials.”
“what?” your eye twitches.
“yeah,” he nods, “it’s a bit of a cleanse if you will. staring at your screen all day and finding value in fake posts is not good for mental health, you know? i’m trying to be more in tune with myself. it’s been a real self-journey.”
before the end of this project, you might either be a college dropout or an inmate at the county jail. you’re not sure, either is equally as possible.
“gojo satoru, i am sick of your games,” you spit, “we both know—”
“and i would hate not being in touch with my partner since it’s a crucial part of this project for us to work together,” he hums, something of a smug look plastered on his aggravatingly gorgeous face, “that thirty percent deduction for ineffective partner communication would be such a shame to get when we’re working so hard already on this, wouldn’t you agree?”
is he threatening you? for your number? with your grade? he is, you realize—and you clench your fist tightly around the phone in your hands as he eyes it with a knowing look on his face. he has you right where he wants you, whether you like it or not.
“you’re an asshole,” you spit.
“i’m a mental health advocate,” he gasps—he has the nerve to act offended, even as he’s so obviously enjoying working you up like this. you wish he’d drop dead immediately. maybe you could take his card from his wallet as his cold body lays lifeless on the table and order yourself a new laptop if he did—that would be ideal. 
“i saw you post on your story last night—”
“you didn’t watch it,” he pouts, “i posted a shirtless gym selfie just for you—wait a second, you pay attention to my story, huh?” he cuts himself off with a smirk, wiggling his eyebrows at you, “c’mon, you don’t have to force yourself to skip them. you know you wanna watch them.”
“no, i don’t,” you seethe, “it was just the first one at the top. stop being self-important—”
“anyway,” he drawls, eyeing your phone again. you want to splash your coffee in his face. “i’ll need your number,” he sniffs, “the crushing disappointment of you skipping my story made me realize i’m too focused on getting social media validation, so i’m taking a break. it’s the best thing for me to do in my headspace right now. hope you understand.”
“are you kidding me?” you stare at him. he grins before shaking his head.
“i would never joke about mental health,” he says seriously—it’s not as serious as your desire to slap him, however.
“fine,” you take a long, slow sip of your coffee to calm down, “give me your phone.”
“oh, you’re gonna set your own contact?” he brightens, immediately handing you his phone. it’s brand new—the newest model, in fact. it’s barely been a few days since it dropped. truthfully, you’re not even sure why you’re shocked—of course, he, of all people, would upgrade immediately. “how intimate,” he gushes, “it’s almost like we’re going on a date—”
“do not text me outside of project purposes,” you interrupt, thrusting the phone back into his hands, “got it?”
“you got it,” he grins triumphantly.
—————
like all things he does, gojo finds a roundabout way to keep his word without actually keeping it. it’s his secret talent, you think—finding loopholes through all the technicalities of things.
hey when ur free can u read over my portion? i just finished
btw r u going to that frat party this wknd? u don’t seem the party type haha but u should come 
i’ll introduce u to suguru! he’s my best friend he’s super nice u’ll like him
oh and when do u wanna meet this week? promise i’ll be on time this time ;)
you make sure to only respond to the questions regarding your project—just because he technically kept his word and started the conversation centered around the project before getting off topic doesn’t mean you have to indulge him. and the way he types is infuriatingly annoying—who shortens every possible word like that? only him, you think.
okay, maybe you’re just nitpicking now, but every time you see his name pop up on your screen, your mood sours tenfold. you decide to answer as dryly as possible.
k i’ll look. we meet same time as last.
the period at the end should add the perfect touch—you grin to yourself in pride at that one. instantly, bubbles pop up and indicate he’s typing again. your smile very quickly drops.
wow ur a rly dry texter aren’t u?
that’s ok i don’t judge
so how bout the party? 
i can be ur escort ;) 
it’ll be fun!
from his side of the screen, gojo watches as your contact shows notifications silenced at the bottom. he pouts to himself—no party, then, he thinks.
—————
gojo satoru, the guy who seemingly has everything he could ever want, likes you. 
frankly, he’s not really sure why—at first, he finds you mildly amusing, and he thinks it’d be fun to have a short fling with you perhaps. somewhere along the line, however, that changes. he watches you dedicatedly take notes in class, no matter how tired you seem from work the night before. he notices the way you chew on your bottom lip when you’re really focused—it’s actually very cute, he thinks. and he’s entertained by the way you always have some smart little retort waiting on your tongue. you’re not boring—and more than anything, you leave him a little humbled. it’s refreshing, and he kind of likes it, if he’s being completely honest.
he’s never liked anyone before—it’s a weird feeling. at best, he’s had a crush where he could appreciate that someone is generally pleasing to the eye and has a personality that might mesh well with his, but he’s never yearned for someone before. 
it just so happens to be his luck that the same person he wants more than anything in the entire world (for the first time ever, too) seems to hate his guts. it also happens to be that the same person he wants more than anything is currently getting asked out by some kid from the zenin family. right in front of him. and you’re saying yes. 
why on earth would you say yes to a zenin of all people? don’t you value yourself? 
gojo can admit that he’s had his fair share of heart robbing and tear inducing moments—he’s not exactly someone with the best track record for commitment, but at least he doesn’t use people for his own benefit. plus, he does, in fact, actually plan on committing to you. that zenin boy most certainly can’t be any good news if he’s anything like naoya, who gojo has met on a multitude of occasions, and knows very well is a scoundrel of a guy. 
“see you at nine?” he hears the zenin (what was his name again?) ask you. you nod, smiling sweetly. 
why don’t you smile sweetly at him like that? he buys you coffee every week. sure, he only gets to buy you the coffee because you have no choice but to meet him for the project, but he even offers to get you a slice of cake—you don’t ever accept, though, so he ends up eating both. but you do like coffee, very strong coffee that’s probably not sweet enough for his liking, but you enjoy the coffee he buys you nonetheless, and that has to count for something.
“sure, see you at nine,” you hum.
gojo watches in absolute shock (and abject horror) as you look down shyly. as soon as the zenin boy walks away, he stomps up to you.
“hey, what gives?” he asks petulantly, making your face paint on that irritated look that it always seems to adopt when he’s in the vicinity—how rude.
“what do you mean?” you ask tiredly, “i don’t speak toddler, so please use your words—”
“why’d you say yes to that zenin boy—”
“he has a name. it’s—”
“who cares what his name is? he’s an asshole! he won’t treat you right even if his mother’s life is on the line—”
“oh, and you would?” you raise an eyebrow, glaring at him. how is it his place to tell you who’d treat you right and who wouldn’t? how is it his place to even care?
“i would,” he gasps at the accusation, “you’d date a zenin but not me? how come?”
“because you’re annoying,” you counter like it’s obvious.
okay, now that is technically fair—gojo has heard his fair share of you’re annoying’s from people in his life. in fact, a good amount of them come from his own mother, but he’s also dashingly handsome, very good in bed, has soft hair, is tall and muscular, can buy you whatever you like, and can be smart and funny too if you really don’t care for those kinds of things. he’s the entire package and more. and more importantly, he’s not from the zenin family, and that automatically means you’ll actually be treated with an ounce of respect.
he looks at you incredulously, feelings a little hurt. “that’s not true! name one annoying thing i’ve done—”
“you laughed in the middle of me speaking in class.”
“that wasn’t at you! suguru showed me something funny on his phone—”
“and you took like twenty minutes in line ordering the most sweetest drink on the menu while i was running late—”
“you can’t use that against me, that’s not fair! i’m a paying customer, i should be able to get whatever i want. plus, it’s technically not my fault you were late.”
“you rubbed in the fact that you had a black card.”
“you mentioned it first!”
“you were late to our first meeting for the project.”
“okay, that was an honest mistake! people are allowed to make those, you know—”
“i don’t want to go out with you,” you say frustratedly, “and it’s really annoying when you act like a spoiled brat that can’t handle the word no and keep on insisting, okay? so leave me alone unless it’s to discuss our project—which weighs fifty-five percent of our grade, by the way, so don’t even think about getting lazy.”
he is not lazy, he wants to argue.
but before he can, you roll your eyes and take a step to walk around him, leaving him there to blink in shock. okay, he thinks with a huff, so you’re playing hard to get. that’s no matter, he’s good at the chase anyway. 
—————
the date doesn’t seem to have gone well. gojo can tell because your eyes are slightly red and puffy, and you’re extra grouchy today in class. your professor seems to have noticed, too, because instead of calling on you today, she calls on gojo extra as a rare show of mercy. 
gojo doesn’t mind—this class is surprisingly easy, and he’s bored half the time anyway. he might as well indulge the uptight professor in an ugly brown pencil skirt and answer her pretentious questions that aren’t as complex as she thinks they are. 
“so,” he finally breaks the silence, “how was your date—”
“if you’re looking for a chance to say i told you so, just get it over with, you jerk,” you grumble. he raises his eyebrows in surprise before both hands go up in surrender.
“i wasn’t,” he says genuinely, “you just…uh…you look upset, is all.”
you hesitate for a short second, gauging his sincerity for a moment before sighing and slumping on the desk, cheek resting on your arm. gojo resists the urge to poke the soft flesh—it’ll probably make you mad, and you’re already in a bad mood. 
“he was…pushy,” you say quietly, “i don’t really believe in taking things far on the first date. he didn’t like that.” instantly, his fists clench tightly, eyeing you from the side carefully, almost in concern. “nothing happened,” you wave off, “but he did make me feel disgusting,” you mutter.
“yeah, well, he is a zenin,” he points out, “they’re…well, my family’s known them for a while. my mom hates them.”
you look over at him in mild interest, raising an eyebrow. “don’t tell me there’s drama in the rich community,” you gasp, “i thought you all just came as one to sip fancy wine and laugh at the poor together.”
he snorts, throwing you a toothy grin that you think for a moment is kind of cute—but that doesn’t mean he’s any different from the rest of the rich folks. someone of gojo satoru’s caliber has no business mixing with someone of yours—it’s common knowledge. gojo has everything he wants, and if he doesn’t, it’s a simple matter of asking before it’s his. there’s simply no way you can mold into his world to be what he needs you to be, and when the time inevitably comes when he realizes you’re not what he wants, well…you’d like to save yourself the wounded pride and crushed soul while you can. 
“sometimes we have fancy appetizers too with the wine,” he jokes, “don’t forget those.”
“oh, my apologies,” you chuckle. gojo likes it when you laugh, he decides. it looks much better than when you’re glum—he thinks seeing your lips quirked in anything other than a smile is a waste of your perfect features, and he can’t have that.
“my mom married my old man in this stupid arranged marriage or something,” he explains casually, like it’s just the norm. you suppose it is—for the rich, at least. you wonder briefly if gojo will have a marriage planned for his future, too, and you wonder if he’s okay with that. surely it’ll be some wealthy and fancy socialite of a girl that fits his family’s standards. someone who’s not you—not that you care anyway, you wouldn’t marry him regardless. “my grandma wanted her to marry the zenin, but she said no. said he treated her like a piece of meat every time they met, so she settled for my dad instead. lucky her, 'cause now i’m her son,” he beams. 
settled—something about the way he says it makes you think his parents must not really care for each other as a husband and wife should. it makes you think briefly about what his childhood might’ve been like, not watching his parents happy and in love the way they should be. but still, the way gojo talks about his mother is fond, with a gentle smile on his face as he recalls the things she’s told him. you can’t help but smile a little too.
“i think that makes you the lucky one,” you snort, “you’d still be her son. just that you’d be a zenin.”
he crinkles his nose at the thought, dramatically shivering and making you giggle. “gross,” he gags.
“well, now you have her to thank,” you hum, “your dad would’ve been…whoever the zenin she was supposed to marry is.”
“yeah, well, trust me,” he mumbles, his smile dropping ever so slightly, “my old man’s not that big of an upgrade from a zenin. even my grandfather’s sick of him. imagine being such a douche, your own dad can’t stand you.”
you’re learning more about gojo in one sitting than you ever imagined (or planned) to learn—part of that is because he seems like he’s the type to overshare on the first meet; the other part…well, you have to be honest with yourself, it’s not exactly a bad pastime hearing him talk about himself. gojo is an odd piece of work, and you can’t say you hate learning about the little pieces that come together to make him so weird. 
okay, perhaps weird is a bit rude, you think—he’s…unique.
“oh, so you’re the dictionary definition of a rich boy, huh?” you hum, resting your cheek on your hand as you sit up and face him—gojo, for a quick moment, feels his heart stutter when you talk to him like that: with your undivided attention like he’s the only one in the room. 
“what makes you say that?”
“daddy issues is like…the first thing in the rich boy starter pack.”
he laughs at that, smooth and almost sweet—it’s a dangerous thing. it’s easy to attract you to him, like a bee to honey, with the way his lips curl like that, showing off his dimples. but the bees can easily turn into maggots—and you don’t want to find yourself as a dead carcass by the end of this.
“i don’t have daddy issues,” he says smoothly, “that old man should sleep with both eyes open. if anything, he has son issues.”
“you’re hands down the oddest person i have ever met,” you mumble.
“what was that? did you say hottest? yeah, i know—”
“shut up, jackass,” you scowl, shoving his shoulder when he leans closer with a bat of his lashes. he laughs, and so do you—and just for one, quick, momentary instance, gojo satoru is not so bad. dangerous and a bad choice maybe, a setup for a big mistake perhaps, something you should stay away from, in fact. 
but not so bad. 
“how about i show you what it’s like to go on a date with a gojo,” he grins, winking easily. he’s persistent—very persistent, you note. “you might like it a lot more than a zenin.”
“no, thank you,” you hold a hand up, “never going to happen.”
“never say never,” he hums, “you might eat your words.”
—————
“hey, satoru?”
“that’s not my name.”
“that actually is your name,” you say tiredly.
“hmph,” satoru rolls over, dramatically tugging the blankets over his body as he shuffles away from you, “not to you, it’s not.” 
you sigh, pursing your lips at his antics. “oh my god. okay—hey, toru?” you correct yourself. and just like that, he turns back around, grinning brightly as he inches closer until his head is resting on your chest.
“yes, baby?” he says sweetly, earning a roll of your eyes as your fingers weave into his hair. it’s soft—you don’t think you ever want to let go.
“it’s way better dating a gojo, by the way,” you murmur, “than a zenin.”
“oh yeah?” he grins smugly, arm draping over your body as he kisses your jaw, “i told you it would be, didn’t i?”
“i haven’t dated other rich families to compare, though,” you tease, “you might get replaced.”
“unlikely,” he chuckles, “no one,” there’s a kiss to your jaw, “will love you,” another kiss to your cheek, “like me.”
finally, there’s a slow, soft kiss to your lips—and when he kisses you like that, you have no choice but to believe him.
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satoru sooooo sends multiple texts back to back he just like me for real
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msnihilist · 2 months
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Idea for a fic I just had, sharing it because I will probably never write it:
CH.1
During "Lost in Fairy World," Hazel and Dev stumble upon Timmy's old Chosen One statue, of himself holding the White Wand. Hazel is intrigued to see a statue of a human in Fairy World, and wonders if he was a godchild, like them. Dev doesn't really care, and is exceedingly jealous of whatever this human did to get himself memorialized this way.
When Cosmo, Wanda, and Peri catch up with the kids, Hazel asks about the statue. (She's already got her own amazing story written in her head, lol.) Dev says something to the effect of, "What did this loser do to get a statue of himself?"
Peri immediately takes offense to that, snapping that Dev isn't allowed to call him a loser. "Well, why not? What's so great about him?" "He's my brother."
Wanda and Cosmo are very uncomfortable with this conversation and visibly saddened. But they tell an abridged version of the story since the kids are curious and Peri didn't really remember it all, since he was a baby at the time.
Through the story, Wanda and Cosmo get caught up reminiscing, getting stuck on the funny little details and wishfully recounting their misadventures with Timmy. It's clear that they love him very much. (Hazel isn't jealous. She isn't.)
Hazel asks where Timmy is now and doesn't get an answer. After the five of them get back to Earth, Cosmo and Wanda retire early for the night and Peri is quiet with Dev, too.
CH.2
Dev thinks that they should track this "Timmy Turner" down. (He wants to prove that he's better than this guy, but doesn't want to admit to himself why he wants Peri's love/attention like that.) Hazel thinks they should leave well-enough alone, because talking about Timmy made their fairies so sad. (Sad like how she gets sad about Antony, but at least she can call her brother. None of the fairies spoke about Timmy in the present tense.)
Dev convinces her by saying that it'll make them happy if they can reunite the fairies with Timmy. Hazel reluctantly agrees.
It's pretty easy to track Timmy down. Turns out that he lives in the city, and his buckteeth are the same as they are on the statue. Dev and Hazel immediately clock him. They come up with an excuse to talk to Timmy by stealing his wallet and then "kindly" returning it to him. After which, Hazel insistently talks about anything and everything to Timmy, because what's he gonna do? Tell two kids to fuck off?? No, he's a polite adult and he endures this weird interaction.
Except Hazel and Dev then keep following Timmy around, learning his schedule so they can keep talking to him. Hazel needles little details about Timmy's life out of him, and realizes that he's lonely and clearly missing something. This makes her determined to reunite him with Cosmo and Wanda (even though a part of her desperately doesn't want to share). Dev is still convinced that Timmy is a loser. He speculates that there's no way this guy saved the planet, and Cosmo and Wanda were probably just talking him up.
Either way, Hazel slowly forces Timmy to be friends with her. He is an adult, so he's slow to admit that he's lonely enough to be friends with a ten-year-old, but Hazel reminds him of a kind girl he used to be friends with as a kid wears him down and he grows to tolerate and then even enjoy running into her around the city.
CH.3
Hazel eventually arranges for Timmy to meet her at the fountain, and also asks Cosmo and Wanda to be there in their human forms. She's super excited for them to finally meet again!! (Dev doesn't tell Peri about this — he doesn't want to admit that he's worried it will go too well if they do meet up again.)
Except that when Timmy arrives, Cosmo and Wanda aren't happy to see him. They look completely devastated. Timmy greets Hazel and awkwardly introduces himself to Cosmo and Wanda. Cosmo bursts into tears and flees. Wanda sticks around long enough to mumble an excuse and then also leaves. Timmy is confused, and Hazel doesn't know what she did wrong.
When she finds Cosmo and Wanda, they confess that they have been keeping an eye on Timmy. How could they not, you know? But it hurt too much to see him living his own life, doing fine without them. They started godparenting Hazel in part to have a distraction, so that they aren't thinking about Timmy and aren't watching him. Seeing him in person brought those ten-thousand years of hurt to the surface.
They also explain to Hazel that Timmy doesn't remember them at all, and that's the worst part — that all of the love they had for each other ended up meaning nothing at all, that they got too close to a godkid and paid the price and there's nothing they can do about it.
Hazel is crushed, but also not giving up. She tells them that Timmy does need them, he's an adult but his life is still empty. No one ever really stops needing their parents.
Wanda, tearfully, says, "But we're not his parents." That's the reality of their situation, and they have to face it no matter how much it hurts.
CH.4
Her plan a bust, Hazel leaves Wanda and Cosmo alone and goes to talk to Dev about what happened. She wonders how awful Peri must feel, sympathizing that she wouldn't know what to do with herself if she just woke up one day and Antony didn't remember her.
Dev (who is getting really fed up with hearing about Timmy) can't and refuses to empathize. He says that he's always been fine as an only child, and if he's supposed to be a "distraction" for Peri, then the least he could do is act like Dev is a priority instead of moping about someone who doesn't even care about him all day.
Hazel asks where all of this is coming from, Dev sneers that Peri hasn't been the same since they visited the statue. Peri doesn't talk about it, but it's clearly about Timmy. Hazel tells him that Peri is obviously hurting, and Dev snaps that he's hurting, too, and Peri should be doing his job. (Why do people only care about him when its their job?)
Hazel simply asks Dev why he's hurting, and Dev freezes. He doesn't really know how to articulate all of his upset and anger, and that forces him to pause and quiet himself. He then admits to Hazel that everyone is so obsessed with Timmy, even she's been hanging out with that loser more than him. And Dev just. Misses them. Wants attention. He wonders if anyone will care about him if he were to disappear, the way that the fairies care about Timmy.
Hazel assures him that she would care. She'd cry over him for 10,000 years at least! Which makes Dev giggle, even though he's still trying to be upset. Still, Hazel apologizes. She was trying to make everyone happy, and she didn't realize that she was failing him. Dev brushes her apology off, saying, "It's not your job to make me happy — it's Peri's. He's just been slacking."
Hazel also admits that she's jealous of Timmy, too. She feels bad for being jealous, but that doesn't mean that she's not. She knows that Cosmo and Wanda love her, but she also knows that she'll never replace Timmy for them.
The fairies finally reveal that they were listening the whole time. (After they left, Cosmo and Wanda went to Peri to tell him about what Hazel and Dev were doing behind their backs. Peri is at first upset that Dev kept Timmy a secret from him, but also acknowledges that he isn't really surprised. Dev is a complicated, hurt kid, and he needs more than what Peri has been giving him, especially lately.)
Cosmo assures Hazel that she can't replace Timmy, but no one could replace her, either. She's wonderful all on her own, and Cosmo and Wanda adore her — they wouldn't want her any other way.
Peri apologizes to Dev for not doing his job. Dev awkwardly accepts, then tells Peri that his job is to grant wishes, not "care" about Dev. Peri teases him by saying, "If that was my job, I would be working over-time." He says that Dev isn't a "distraction," at all, and that if Peri didn't want to be with him, he could leave at any time. Reaffirming that he's here because he wants to be spurs Dev into hugging Peri, albeit only briefly.
With all of the apologies and hugs out of the way, Dev asks to see Da Rules. He flips to the section about losing your fairies and says, "It says here that a godchild must lose memories of their fairies and all things magic... But it doesn't say that another godchild couldn't wish those memories back."
The fic ends with Timmy at the fountain again. Hazel approaches with Dev, and the fairies in their human forms. She asks Timmy if he remembers the three of them. Timmy confesses that he doesn't. Hazel grins: "I wish that you did."
Fin
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jade-jini · 11 months
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yunjin is the only thing i can honestly think off 😭 also i’d love to see how y/n and loser g!p yunjin got together 🤭
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(Look at this cute thing, I’m weak for her)
WELL OFC DEAR ANON lol. So continuing with how our loser g!p Yunjin and reader became all lovey dovey (sorry if it’s too long and if it took too long 😭) THIS IS ALL FLUFF.
As I mentioned, you guys are in the same program so you see her during class and often around campus, mostly just exchanging a few hi’s and comments about class stuff but it never became more than those short conversations. Yunjin can be a very outgoing loser, with her silly jokes and cute pickup lines and constant compliments. She was a sweet girl! Just didn’t feel brave enough to make a more bold move just yet:(. Sakura would always be like “NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT?!” And she’d be like “NEVER GIVE UP!” But then when she has the chance to turn her flirt into something else she panics and goes🧍🏻‍♀️
She was getting brave tho, she really was! Until that stupid jock mf had to ruin all the confidence she (and Sakura) has been working so hard to build. This guy was into you. At first he really thought Yunjin didn’t have a chance because how could a loser have one? but then he noticed how you’d giggle like an idiot with Yunjin and his brain went “danger 😐” so like a fvckin asshole the only thing he thought was to make Yunjin afraid to make any move at all, hurting her self esteem.
It was during a morning that she hadn’t see you around yet. She always looks forward to the classes you shared, and when she didn’t see you in your seat as always, she was so confused ‘cause you tended to be on time. She still had hopes that you’d eventually show up. However, her confusion turned into disappointment and sadness when half the class passed and you were nowhere to be found. Yunjin knew she was being dramatic but c’mon! Seeing you is her favorite part of the day :( she spent the rest of the class resting her chin on her books with a pout. Eunchae saw her friend and thought she looked like a sad puppy, she thought it was cute and funny but also had sympathy for her friend. During the little break they had before their next class that was in the same room, she tapped Sakura’s shoulder to get her attention.
“Yunjin unnie looks like a lost puppy when y/n is not around I swear” she told her while trying not to laugh. The eldest turned her head to her red hair friend and sighed with a smile as she shook her head.
“She kinda is if you think about it, I guess” she told the youngest, who couldn’t contain a laugh from escaping her lips. This caused Yunjin to look up to her friends with a frown.
“It’s not fair, why isn’t she here?!” Yunjin started, fixing her posture “Y/n doesn’t tend to miss class, and if she didn’t come to this one she might as well just miss the rest of the day and the classes we have together… ” she complained with a cute pout, but unfortunately somebody heard their conversation.
“Like you would know, wouldn’t you creep?” The guy said, while looking at the girl with a sarcastic smile (Idk bro picture a kpop boi here if you want ig-). “God you spy on her so much you know her schedule? AND you wanna talk like you’re close with her and know what she would do. You’re such a weirdo, that’s exactly why she wouldn’t look at you, you know?” He said with that disgusting mean tone, like he himself knew you any better.
Yunjin was surprised, she knew this guy and knew he wasn’t friendly specially with well, people who didn’t share his exact interest (aka if you’re a nerd), but she wasn’t expecting him to talk to her at all let alone insult her like that, I mean she has gotten kinda bullied before when she was younger but she has done her best to either ignore these people or to defend herself, to which her friends helped a lot.
“And who the fuck are you to talk to her like that?-” Eunchae started but Sakura stopped her grabbing her arm, making sure the girl didn’t start any trouble. The man just put his hands up and laughed.
“I’m just saying, y/n is way out of your league bro, you’re embarrassing yourself and most likely making her feel uncomfortable. Do you enjoy doing that?”
“I would never do that!” Yunjin was offended, she didn’t have any bad intentions with you. Did she cross any boundary? You would tell her though right? You looked like somebody who knew how to speak for yourself well enough, she’s seen it. “I’d never do that intentionally, and I’m sure she would tell me. So far she hasn’t shown any discomfort in any moment we’ve talked.” she said trying to sound a little more confident, mostly to also convince herself you actually didn’t dislike her.
“she’s just too nice to let you know!” He answered as if it was the most obvious fact in the world. “And who knows, maybe she laughs behind your back at your behavior and that’s why she keeps you close.” He finished before walking out of the room, not letting any of the girls talk back (Lord and Sakura know Eunchae was ready to curse Tf outta him) and leaving a mess in Yunjin’s head, filling it with a lot of insecurities and doubts. Girlie was gonna be overthinking about you all day and not in the sweet cheesy way she always does :(
“What. An. Asshole!” Eunchae exclaimed, getting a scold from kkura for the language “no I’m serious what’s wrong with him?? Who does he think he is?! Asshole…”
“Hong Eunchae!” Sakura said in a serious tone, making the girl simply huff and sit down with crossed arms and a pout (Manchae my kid). “Yunjini? Are you ok?” She asked in a softer tone while sitting in her chair next to her friend, who had such a sad and pensive expression “don’t pay no mind to that guy, he doesn’t know you and I seriously doubt he knows y/n.”
“Yeah exactly!” The youngest said “he’s probably just jealous that you always make y/n laugh.”
“Yeah but is it a ‘you’re so funny I’m enjoying this’ laugh or a ‘you’re pathetic and embarrassing’ laugh? Now I don’t know…”
“She’s not a bad person, unnie. You wouldn’t like her if she was, right? But if you’re feeling insecure, let’s see her behavior carefully and maybe we’ll be able to tell.”
the tall girl sighed, resting her head on her books again. Eunchae and Sakura just looked at each other (the oldest patting her friend’s head), not sure how else to comfort their friend, but hoping next time she sees you something good happens and you somehow get those thoughts out of her head.
——
Meanwhile, you decided to miss a class and went to this store you found online where they sell different types of merch about video games, animes, stuff like that, to buy some cool genshin impact photocards you saw online. You knew two things; 1. Yunjin liked that game a lot, and 2. She was probably not gonna make a move to get closer any time soon lol so you decided to give the game a try, and liked it a lot! And now you’re gonna buy some photocards for her as well as a way of making more conversation and getting closer.
Once you got them, you quickly put a Genshin Yunjin one on your phone case (some selfies for social media Ofc) and decided to finally go to class, excited to show this girl that you were basically crushing on the gift you got for her.
Your second class of the day was luckily one with Yunjin, so you were hoping to make it on time to talk with her a little bit before it started, and so you did! But weirdly, you caught the girl on her seat, very quiet while the friends of her who also shared this class seemed a little worried and empathetic with whatever was going on with the red hair girl. You took your seat close to them and waved hi to her friend, whose name if you remember well was Sakura. With a sign you asked her if Jen was ok, to which she replied with a “so-so” sign and a little smile. You nodded sympathetically and decided to maybe wait until later on the day to talk with her, now feeling slightly nervous yourself to make any move. However, while you were considering this option, kkura thought seeing you might cheer her friend up, so she elbowed Yunjin and let her know that you were in the room.
Once the girl looked at your direction, there was a sparkle in her eyes, the one that always appeared whenever she saw you or thought of you. However, once she remembered the mean words the idiot from earlier told her, her smile turned into a more shy, sad small one, and her eyes went to the floor.
“Yunjin? You’re not gonna say hi to her like always?” The Japanese girl asked her in a low voice, trying to motivate her dear friend.
“I don’t know, Kkura..” the sad girl said “What if I just make her feel uncomfortable? What if that’s what I’ve been doing? That’s not only embarrassing, but also not fair for her to feel like that, and not fair for me to keep my hopes high if I’m clearly out of her league. I don’t wanna get even more hurt and also I—”but your voice interrupted her sad rambling.
“Hey Yunjin, Look what I got!” You called, smiling that pretty smile of yours and showing her the back of your phone, hoping this somehow will help cheering her up. And it did! Yunjin’s expression went from sad, to surprised that you called, to excited.
“Oh. My. God. Is that a Genshin Impact special edition Yun Jin photocard ?!” She said in her peculiar loud voice and with a smile showing her perfect teeth. There. There it was. The excited and loud loser who caught your attention. “Omg, y/n! How did you get this? I didn’t even know you liked Genshin!”
“Well, constantly hearing you screaming about it made me curious!” You teased her while laughing, to which she blushed but didn’t stop smiling while listening to you “it was just a few days ago so I’m very new, I actually enjoyed it a lot so I decided to search info about the characters online, and went this morning to this cool store I found to buy some of these.”
“So that’s why you weren’t here earlier” Sakura commented, making you look at her a little surprised.
“Oh you noticed?”
“Yunjin did.” Eunchae answered while looking at her friend with a mischievous smile, to which Yunjin responded with a blush, a threat in her eyes and a promise for vendetta later. “She missed you and everything.”
“Eunchae!” She simply groaned, pouting at the embarrassment her friend made her go through. But to you it was actually really cute the fact that she noticed your absence.
“Well, please accept these as an apology then.” You said while getting the little bag that contained the other photocards and giving it to her. She was so surprised because a gift. For her? From you?! “I didn’t know who your favorite character was so I made sure to get as many as possible. Please take as many as you want, I mainly got them for you to be honest.” You admitted, feeling brave to confess your intentions, even with her friends around.
“Oh my~ this is so cute!” Eunchae squeaked while shaking Yunjin’s shoulder (visual representation), while the girl was just speechless holding the bag you gave her and switching from looking at it to looking at you, who couldn’t stop smiling, satisfied at her reaction while your hands were politely behind your back in a cute shy way. Of course, Sakura had to push her to get out of her shocked state. Yunjin shook her head to bring herself back before speaking.
“Omg y/n, I don’t know what to say, thank you so much!” She said, feeling touched by the detail. Yunjin was looking at you with such sweet eyes, you were making her fall deeper for you, and she didn’t know that’s exactly your plan.
“It’s ok. Just please make sure to leave some Yun Jin for me, she’s my favorite character you know?” You told her in a clearly flirty way and a wink, making sure the message was clear. This made the red hair girl’s eyes open wide as her face had no idea what to do, besides blushing and smiling like an idiot.
“Hehe, Yunjin unnie’s face is trying to match her hair.” Eunchae teased, making you and Sakura laugh at the taller girl.
“Hong Eunchae I swear to God.”
——
After that conversation, the professor entered the classroom, so you quickly agreed on hanging out after class to continue talking about your interest in common. Sakura had a class, and Eunchae went with her after mentioning she was grateful to be able to go ‘cause she didn’t want to third wheel you guys anymore, earning another groan and blush from her best friend. Talking with Yunjin was really nice, and she was really hyped and happy about sharing this topic, so much she decided to invite you to her place so you could continue there, watch some content and even play a little bit! She was excited of being able to teach none other than her crush how to play her favorite game.
Of course she didn’t realize the weight of her actions until you were actually in her room.
Oh god. Her crush was in her room. Alone with her.
Girlie went from excited to nervous once she saw you making yourself comfortable in her bed. Her bed was really soft and warm, and her room was cozy. It reflected her personality well. A nice combination of beige walls and white. Most of the room had warm colors, and the decoration was based on some posters, little shelves with albums and books, pictures and figures of video-games characters the girl was a fan of. She was very organized and clean, her desk having her computer and just a couple notebooks at the moment. You hoped you could spend more time there with her in the future (and no not only for the nasty 🤨).
“This is a really nice place Yun” you told her.
“Thanks, that’s one of the reasons I like spending so much time at home.” She said with a giggle doing her best to contain the blush in her cheeks because did you just call her by a nickname?😳 bro do it again.
“I get it, if my room was this nice and comfy I too would prefer to just stay and play all day.” You said as she lied down next to you.
“Well, you can always come and play with me!” She offered smiling innocently (aw my pookie wookie 🥺), but c’mon you had to tease her after saying that-
“You want me to come play with you, huh?” You said with an obvious teasing tone and a smirk moving your eyebrows up and down, now making it impossible for the red hair girl to not match her cheeks color with her hair.
“I mean! It’s always fun to play genshin with friends…” she said, trying to save herself from the embarrassment, but she felt it was too late so her hands went to her face as she groaned in a low voice. You laughed. She was so endearing, so cute. You couldn’t resist her and she wasn’t even trying to do anything at all. This is the girl you wanted. It just felt too right. It felt like home in your heart even before it did in your head.
“You remember I told you Yunjin is my favorite genshin impact character?” You asked her, taking her hands off her face but not letting go of them, to which she hummed in response. “And do you know why she is my favorite character?”
“Well, her playability in my opinion is really good. Her design and character description is also captivating, and since you mentioned you’re new to the game maybe that’s the reason you liked her. Although I must say I pr—” god this girl could talk. So what’s better than shutting up your crush with a kiss? Nothing bro. Nothing so that’s what you did. With a sweet kiss that she was doing her very best to correspond once the initial shock passed, as she’s been dreaming of doing since the moment her eyes fell on you. Your hand moved slowly from her own hands to her face, caressing it softly as her trembling hand went to your waist. As the seconds passed, her hands felt more comfortable, so she hugged you closer to her, to which you responded hugging her as well. Once you stopped kissing ( barely leaving any space in between your faces), you whispered in her lips “so again, do you know why Yunjin is my favorite character?”
And with her vision blurry and her mind clearly malfunctioning because of everything that was happening (but can you blame her tho?) she said:
“Who’s Yunjin?”
Bro are you serious.
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blockedbykei · 2 months
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𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐈 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ?
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— synopsis: kageyama always had one agenda in his life: volleyball. it just so happens that you seemed to challenge him even more than the sport has ever done in his life.
— warnings: (this chapter) awkward kageyama, sucks at feelings. frenemies to lovers, a little angst bc kageyama's about to relapse lol pls don't attack me also i don't know how the academic system works in japan
— parts: i, ii, iii, iv
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ii; love thorns all over this rose
kageyama is awake thirty minutes before his alarm rings.
and in those thirty minutes, he spends it like he usually does— planning.
and with a little bit of spice, reminiscing.
"they'll pay you," he said on the phone. he had sensed your relief despite your silence on the other side.
"thank god." you sighed. "okay dude, i gotta be honest with you. i'm only using this opportunity as some kind of job starter, 'kay? i won't be permanent. so don't get your hopes up."
"i won't be too hopeful on you." he deadpanned. a little too honest, to upfront, maybe brought up by buried pain. kageyama shook the thought. "when can you start?"
"anytime you want me to start, tobio-chan." you beamed. he heard ruffling in the background, and the familiar sound of keys jingling. "except today though. i have some paperwork to do. will tomorrow be okay?"
"okay."
that was yesterday, at 4:13pm. it was now 5:30 in the morning.
and it seems like you were awake too.
kageyama jumps at the sound of his phone vibrating against his wooden bedside table. he pushes the covers off his body, pushing himself up to sit against the bed frame before unplugging his phone off his cable.
you. u up? wanna jog around? 5:32am
he doesn't hesitate to reply.
kageyama. Sure. 5:32am
to his fortune, your apartment was near his home. so the idea of jogging around was easily fulfilled as his legs are now being warmed up outside the entrance of your building.
kageyama is a little eager to see you at this time in the morning, a rush of excitement adding a bounce on his heels. and he only waits for five minutes until he sees you exit the elevator in your sports attire.
jacket and leggings. same as his, except he wore sweatpants.
your hair is tied up messily, strands of hair above your head uncombed and bumpy. you walk towards him and give him a smile, stopping just a few friendly feet from him.
he thinks that image of you will stay plastered on his mind.
"ready to go, tobio?"
he looks at you, foot pressed on a bench. his fingers tie his laces as he stares at you.
kageyama was always a man of few words, and you'd learned how to read him through his eyes and body language alone. his stare may seem blank to others, but you read it as "yes, i'm ready."
and he says it either way. "yes"
"so what exactly is it that i'm supposed to do?"
you've matched his pace, or maybe he's slowed down to jog by your side, or maybe he's just slow and you're a bit faster than him. either way, you're happy to be in the same speed, enough so that you can talk to him without having a hard time.
kageyama hums. "uh. you will be like my life coach?"
"what the fuck is a life coach?" you grimace.
"i don't know either." his breath is white past his lips from the cold air, sparing you a quick glance. "i just think i'm too obsessed with volleyball that i kind of... don't have a life outside of it."
"i thought volleyball was your life."
"it is. until i became an adult." he swallows thickly. "when i'm not on the court, i'm in my classes. when i'm not in my classes and the court's not open i... i don't do anything. i think i'm a boring person."
"so you're like a loser?"
kageyama sighs dejectedly. "yeah."
"and you want me to make you more, what, interesting?"
"yeah."
"and i'm getting paid to do this?"
"yeah."
"i'm getting paid to teach you how to get a life," you guffaw, small pants leaving your mouth as you do so. "i never thought i'd be doing that after three years. holy shit, tobio-chan."
kageyama pouts. "do you find joy over the fact that i'm a loser?"
"oh yes," you shake your head, a smile on your face. "i do enjoy that."
you both stop after ten minutes, deciding to take a break by sitting on the bench. you place your feet on the space beside kageyama, bringing it to your chest, facing him. he tilts his head up and swallows the water rapidly as if he'd been parched since the dawn of time.
he wipes his sweat off his forehead, his biceps contracting, hair sticking to his skin. you blush at the sight.
"so what do you want to try doing?" you ask him, tugging on your sleeves.
kageyama shrugs. "how to not be too obsessed with volleyball."
"okay genius," you roll your eyes. "i meant do you want to learn how to ride a bike? how to paint? to swim?"
"i know how to ride a bike," then he pauses, looking down at the tips of your shoes grazing his thigh. he scratches his chin. "i wanna learn how to swim."
you scrunch your nose. "did you even attend the swimming classes back in high school?"
"no."
"god, tobio," you laugh through your nose. "where were you? hiding in the gym?"
"i was with you inside the janitor's closet remember?"
your smile fades a little, pulling your feet closer to yourself. and then you look away from him.
"so i'm teaching you how to swim then." kageyama wishes you'd look at him again, take your eyes off from whatever you're staring at and plant them on him instead. "i might push you into the deep part of the pool, then i remembered you're tall so you could just stand. unless i put a rock on you..."
"do i need to list it down?" he asks, and you look at him. your eyes seemed duller than earlier. he almost winces. "all the things you're going to teach me?"
"hm," you scoot closer. your arms rest on top of your knees, your chin resting on top of your left forearm. "first, you're gonna get a manicure with me. that'll be tomorrow because i want one."
"okay."
"then we're gonna do yoga," you beam. "so you could relax. you're always so tense."
kageyama pulls his phone app, and you assume he's opening the notes app. "okay."
"swimming. then skydiving. camping. joining those bike marathon thingies. oh! pottery. i think you'd like pottery."
"do we really have to do skydiving?" he shivers a little; partly from the cold, partly from the image of falling from the sky with the chance of dying. "i don't think that's a hobby that will help me with volleyball. i think that would just make me want to stay on the court."
you roll your eyes. "whatever. add cooking. unless you already know how to."
"just a little."
"add cooking."
his fingers type on the letters, the click-clacks emitting from his phone mingling with the soft breeze's gentle whisper. "anything else?"
"i kinda wanna keep the others a surprise." you smile, flashing him a bit of your teeth between your lips. the wisps of your hair fall on your cheeks, and your eyes almost smile at him. "done taking a break? i wanna run again."
kageyama stands up, putting his phone on his pocket. you kick your feet off the bench and place them on the ground, stretching your arms.
you start before he does. he feels a thread of nervousness coursing through his veins, tying it around each tendril. there's doubt knocking on his head telling him that at some point of this "life-coaching" of yours would eventually fuck up whatever it is that you have now.
he wouldn't want to fuck up twice.
his feet jogs himself up at your pace, his heart twinging at the smile you give him.
september 2014
senior year meant mandatory swim classes. which meant that kageyama would skip class for the 63rd time since his freshman year.
the table was jovial with excitement, albeit it seems that tsukishima was voicing the similar disdain towards swimming. "getting dressed in front of you guys is enough." he reasoned.
hinata and yamaguchi beam in excitement, mostly because they both knew they would be given free time to play around the pool. and since the boys and girls were separated, you and yachi made a silent vow to stick with one another.
"tobio," you placed your hand on his shoulder. he jumped out of his daze, food in mouth, his head turning to look at you, and you debate on telling him to stop looking at you like that, because while a second ago he seemed horrified, now he looked at you like you'd given him a miracle to be saved. "you alright?"
"yes." his head nodded, putting another broccoli in his occupied mouth. "i don't want to go swimming."
"me neither," you giggled. your hand was still on his shoulder, burning onto his uniform and seeping through his skin. kageyama fought hard not to blush. "i promised yachi though, so. please don't skip."
"okay." okay, i'll still skip.
"kageyama," hinata bumped his shoulder. "let's race to see who swims fastest."
"i don't want to, dumbass," kageyama snarled. "i want to eat lunch. let's see who gets to finish first."
their petulance had always interested you. their relationship would always trick people into thinking they despised one another, but no one ever really saw their true bond and how close they were. you laughed at the way they would swallow their food directly and at the way yachi had begin to voice her concern on choking and something about the heimlich maneuver.
in front of you, yamaguchi and tsukishima's slowly blooming ("platonic" they said, defending) relationship seemed to quietly berate the two.
later that day, you'd lost yachi with your other classmates right after you ascend from the pool. you quickly got yourself dressed, hair dripping wet and leaving streaks of water down the back of your blouse, and searched for her.
you found yourself inside the gym five minutes later, seeing that the doors were unlocked. but when you peeked, the sight of her bright blonde hair was nowhere to be seen.
a muffled cluttering sound startled you.
"hello?"
your voice echoed in the empty gym.
"(y/n)?"
kageyama's nervousness rang at every corner of the gymnasium. you saw him peek his head out from the closet, eyes wide. you furrowed your eyebrows.
"what the fuck are you doing there?" you asked hastily, walking towards him. "you're supposed to be at the pool—"
he yanked you towards him, inside the closet and closing the door behind him. it hadn't registered to you that kageyama began hearing footsteps approaching the gym and it put his heart at an alarming rate. your mouth snapped shut, hiding behind his body, your hair leaving droplets on his uniform.
then there's muffled conversation, a few laughs, a tone that mimicked questioning, and then you heard the doors slam shut. you froze.
"how are we going to get out?" you panicked, voice small and a whisper, even though you're certain that a normal volume would've sufficed.
"calm down," he scowled. "i have the keys with me. how'd you think i got in here in the first place?"
he pulled the keys out and twirled them in his finger. relief defeats the panic that settled on your face, though a smile never rose out of you. but it was enough for kageyama to reassure you. he walked to you, resting his back against one of the shelves beside you, keeping a distance that could've looked like he wasn't giving you any sort of distance at all.
"what are you doing here?" he asked, arms crossed. you took the keys off his hands, clutching it in your fist, and couldn't help yourself but sneer at him.
"you said you'd go to the class."
"i only said okay, doesn't mean i'm agreeing."
you gawped. "that is agreeing!"
"you didn't answer my question." he instilled. "what are you doing here?"
you scratched the back of your neck, fingertips dampened from your slowly drying hair, chlorine and faint conditioner evident through the scent. "i lost yachi. i thought she could be here 'cause the doors were open."
he showed his acknowledgement through a hum, no words leaving him. you sighed and approached the door, twisting the doorknob and peaked through the small slit you created.
"i should probably go," you said, looking back at him. "we should probably go."
you give him a stern look, vexated at his lie. kageyama pushed himself off the shelf, walking towards you, and you thought that maybe he'd decided to follow your orders, but instead his arm reaches out to pull the door close.
the brightness from the outside is only evident through the cracks beneath and between the doors, the only light in the dark room. kageyama stood in front of you, both of you leaning your bodies against the metal door.
your heart beated a little faster, the sound reverberating in your ears. you hope he doesn't hear how fast it gets with the way he slowly leaned closer to you, his head tilted just the slighesg, hair falling just above his eyebrows.
his eyes are dark, but there's a little shine at the edge of his irises, his gaze soft. his lips are parted the slightest, tongue coming out to gloss the dried skin. you swallow thickly.
it felt too oddly intimate to be in a situation like this with a friend you've known since the beginning of junior high. and you wondered if it was inappropriate of you to blush wildly; if it was disrespectful of you to want to tiptoe the edge of your friendship just because you're in a closet with him hiding as if you'd both be shot dead and you're enjoying the last, quiet moments together.
you knew you've never seen him as more than a friend. at least, that was what you've manipulated yourself to think. you convinced your excitement to see him as a way to be excited to start your day. you tell yourself you're concerned for his safety because you worry his sister would eat you up if he'd gotten hurt without you rather than because you wouldn't want him to get hurt in general.
you forced him to take breaks from volleyball because you poke fun at his lack of social life, not because you worry he may drive himself away from you from his over enthusiasm and passion.
you do not feel lovesick over kageyama.
and he thought that the look on your face— surprised, blushing, wide eyed— was the most endearing sight out of all endearing sights. the corner of his lip tugs upward, his teeth beginning to poke out of his awkward smile.
"we don't have classes right after," he reasoned. "we could stay here for a few more minutes."
"you-" you point your finger to his chest, nail digging on his shirt and onto his thick skin. "-have practice. i have a student council meeting and volleyball training at the local court, thanks to your fucking greedy asses, by the way. both of which will start in like-... uh...-"
"seven minutes." he cocked a brow. "let's stay here until then."
so you did.
you sat on the floor and ate the snacks he had on his bag, cross legged, on opposite sides. you started the conversation by asking when the nationals were, and that if it fit right into your schedule, you could bring the student council to up the level of the cheerleading team for karasuno. kageyama beamed at your offer.
your phone lit up, a notification bar on the screen, and he knew what your wallpaper was– it was the six of you, on one of the carnivals last june, on the ferris wheel that showed hinata yelling out the edge, tsukishima gripping on the sides for his dear life, yachi and yamaguchi laughing at the chaos they ensued;
you, holding the phone up, with kageyama beside you, smiling with his eyes set on your laughing figure.
he saw the way your eyes lingered on the screen for a moment before you tapped on the text, screen brightening, your fingers tapping on the keyboard.
"who's that?" he asked, curiosity undecided if he should be jealous (and deny it) or be relieved.
"kuroo-san," you said. "he's inviting you guys to play at nekoma next week. says he and the old team are visiting to check out the new team, and he thought it would be great if you guys fought with them again...? what...?"
"why is he texting you, though?" he shoves a hello panda in his mouth. "shouldn't he text yachi? or literally anyone else."
"i don't think he has her number."
"why does he have your number?"
"because hinata gave it to him."
he swore to murder him after 7 minutes.
"i'll tell them," he said, forced to give you a smile; forced to hide the distaste on his tongue at the thought of kuroo sending you a text. "you gonna come?"
"maybe, i could play, too, bring my team so we could finally play at a court where we wouldn't have to share with kids." you scowl at him. "can you impress me for a hundredth time?"
he'd take that chance at any given moment.
kageyama finds himself on the court again after your jog. the cold air still fresh on his damp skin, the sound of your voice still evident even if you'd already left almost an hour ago to meet up with your team one last time.
"so, how'd it go?"
hinata plays with the ball on the other side of the court, bouncing it between the floor and his palm. kageyama shrugs, placing his towel on top of his gym bag.
"she said we'll start tomorrow," he answers, walking towards the net, fingers poking through the square slots. "i'm nervous about this."
"i think it's a big mistake." hinata blurts out, his hand immediately covering his mouth. his wide eyes do nothing but start the fuse in kageyama's temper.
"what do you mean it's a big mistake?" he ducks between the net, towering over his shaking friend, who walks backwards and shoots him an ever nervous grin.
"i'm just saying– i mean well, we've talked here and then, and she hasn't exactly– dude, you're scaring me–"
kageyama stops in his tracks, sighing heavily with a hand on his forehead. "exactly what, hinata?"
his friend shakes his arms, snapping them. his right hand comes up to his left and rotates it, looking at kageyama like he hadn't scared him beforehand. "she hasn't exactly forgotten about what you did, you know. i mean its nice of you to take the chance and make up for what you did, but if you ever fuck up again, i don't think she'll be as forgiving as last time."
"i won't fuck up." he scowls, going back to his side.
"and if she finds out you only did this to keep her from getting that job with kuroo-san?"
kageyama places his hands on his hips, looking up yo the ceiling. it was high; the lights a bit blinding, the basketball hoop folded upwards to keep out of the way from high serves. his eyes close and counts to three, until he feels his nerves calm down, before looking back at hinata.
"has he mentioned it to her?"
"i don't think he has." hinata says. "i don't think he's forgotten, either."
"okay."
"kageyama," he begins, looking at him warningly. "if she finds out you're only doing this so that you won't lose her– so that she'd be here with you, she's not going to like it."
"i know that."
"then stop whatever it is that you're doing!"
"whatever, man! i'm doing her a favor," he spins the ball in his palm, squishing it with the other. kageyama glares at his orange hair, not at his eyes– because he doesn't want to actually make him feel that he was mad at him. "she said she quit because she didn't want to be associated with volleyball anymore. kuroo's offer is associated with volleyba-"
"an offer is an offer, kageyama, it's her decision to decline it or not," hinata sighs. "don't confuse her. don't make her fall again. don't make things even more complicated than it already is."
kageyama feels the gasoline inside him about to burst, his eyebrows furrowing further, scowl deepening. he throws the ball into the air, and jumps at the right time to serve. hinata, thrown off guard, ducks and covers his head with his hands as the ball hits the wall behind him.
hinata looks back at him with wide eyed anger. "you- you jerk!"
he runs to him, diving beneath the net to tackle his legs. kageyama falls to his back, his yell echoing, wrapping his legs around hinata's neck.
his anger, albeit predictable, is rooted on something he can't identify. he knows he's mad at hinata, but he also knows it's not exactly the actual cause. there's a deep set of guilt planted in him that coalesces with the anger he decides to displace on others. maybe it's because he knows that hinata's right— that the offer kuroo was supposed to propose was yours to accept or decline; it wasn't his position to keep you from doing so.
but at the same time, he knows that if he hadn't done anything— even if he could— to keep you here, with him, while he's slowly easing the pain he'd caused you, he would die with the regret he'd feel. and even so, he would do anything to get you back.
so at the feeling of his head meeting the floor, kageyama is snapped into a dilemma of morals and deluded wants. hinata pins him to the ground, knees on either side of his hips, looking disappointedly down on his heaving friend.
"we haven't fought this hard since freshman year," he laughs tiredly. "she's my friend, kageyama. and you're my friend either. i don't want you both to be hurt to the point where it affects all of us. i was honestly surprised that she was able to act normally after the shit you pulled. she was that afraid to lose you."
hinata pushes himself off him, offering his hand to kageyama. he takes it, pulling him off the ground. "please don't tell her."
kageyama could see him contemplate. he knows how easy hinata is to control under pressure, most especially if it included his guilty conscience in honor of a friend— he can't bring himself to lie. he was never a liar at the expense of someone.
but if it was something he had to do for the people that he cared for...
"okay," he says in his pleading gaze. "i can keep quiet. but i don't know when kuroo will bring this up to her. she'll find out eventually."
"i'll tell her myself."
after spending five hours in relishing the exhilarating thrill of spiking a ball across the court, his free training is cut "short" when his phone begins to ring.
doused in sweat, he walks to the bench where his bag resides. hinata plops down to the ground, elbows on his knees, panting. kageyama picks up his phone and sees your icon—
in a small circle, with a smile, in the karasuno uniform with your hair in a ponytail. he does not remember the day the picture was taken nor what the event was, but he swears he's had the same icon of yours since high school, even after he'd switched the phone.
he clicks the green telephone button.
"hello?"
"are you at the court?" there's a busy crowd behind you. you sound uncomfortable.
"no."
"don't lie."
"yes."
you laugh, he blushes. "okay. can i come there if it's okay? we've got matters to discuss."
he says yes and you're there 20 minutes later. you discard the thick coat off your shoulders, revealing something that looked too comfortable to be considered as casual— literally a large shirt and sweatpants.
"ey, (y/n)!" hinata comes up to give you a one-armed hug, trying not to get you wet with his sweat. you smile at him, sitting down on the bench beside kageyama's bag.
"hey, sho-chan." you beam. "mind if i'm here for a short while?"
"i don't mind if you stayed here until midnight." he laughs, sitting down crossed legged in front of you on the floor. kageyama sits on the same bench, his bag dividing the two of you.
"so what's up?" he wipes his face with a towel. do players actually sweat this much?
"so i got a call from your management," you begin, taking your phone out and opening your notes app. "i took in minutes of the meeting as a habit. anyway, so your pr manager told me that we can't exactly be seen together all the time unless we want people to think that we're dating. yuck."
the emphasis on your yuck makes him laugh out the pain.
"anyway, so she said we can't do whatever it is that you want all the time. we either have to do it with your friends, the two of us on a very private area, or just you alone." you explain. "so i decided to, like, create a list of all the things we should do. and i also need you to sign this contract because i'm not doing this forever."
a soft copied contract he assumes is sent by his management is displayed on your phone as you hand it to him. you zoom in on his name, types in capital letters beneath a line where his digital signature is to be placed. with a shaky finger, he writes his signature.
you stutter. "you- you didn't even read it."
"i don't want to."
"you have to," you roll your eyes. "okay so, your management says that i have to do this life-coaching shit of yours only until your next big match."
"which is in a few months." hinata butts in, a granola bar in hand.
a few months. he has a few months with you.
a few months of making up for the damage he caused. a few months to change the way you act around him. a few months to keep you with him. kageyama doesn't know what happens after then— maybe you'd already found out the offer kuroo ought to give you, and maybe you'd take it with no hesitation, leaving him behind.
the stress of lying catches up with the way his stomach twists and his tongue loses its taste. the hollow feeling of nervousness emits from the way his palms begin to sweat. he feels pressured to plan already— to figure out what to do right after the contract ends; what to say when you found out he interfered with a major opportunity.
"yeah. so. i also can't interfere nor be the cause of your downfall in volleyball or they will sue me." you bite your bottom lip. "is that even possible? like, defamation?"
"what's defamation?" kageyama asks, fingertips fiddling with the cap of his waterbottle. you huff.
"it's by ruining one's reputation by creating false statements. i'd do that if you piss me off," you jest, going back to your phone and scrolling. kageyama thinks of it as a real threat. "anyway, so i will have to ask your teammates or friends to come join us for the following weeks, although i do prefer if you also do it."
he frowns. "why me?"
"because you hired me and it's also your job to be less of a pain in the ass," you poke the space between his eyebrows. he groans, grasping your wrist and pull it down from his face.
hinata's eyes narrow at the sight of two tinted cheeks.
you break free from him. "i'll be sending you the list tomorrow. i'll get going now."
kageyama stops you from slinging your bag over your shoulder, a hand on one of the straps. "how'd you get here?"
you make a confused face. "uh. by bus?"
"let me drive you home."
"i'm fine, tobio," you laugh lightly, standing up, adjusting the strap on your shoulder. "it's only one bus ride. plus, i don't think hinata's done with practicing yet—"
"we're done!" hinata claps his shoulder, squeezing it, tight enough to make him uncomfortable. kageyama glares at him through his peripherals. "it's fine. i'll close up."
it's gotten to the point where hinata had pushed the both of you off outside the court and into the parking lot.
kageyama almost feels desolated— the silence caused by confusion almost deemed you a ghost, thus making him feel like he was lost in a very crowded parking lot. but when you nudge his shoulder, and the look on your face was replaced with a small smile, he takes his keys out of the pocket of his gym bag, his car beeping not too far.
you sit on the passenger side, quickly buckling your seat belt and dropping your bag on your lap. kageyama shuts the door and sticks the key in the ignition, a random song on the radio playing as it lights up blue.
no one says a word during the drive.
you can sense the tension was brought by thoughts that are wanted to be shared but never spoken. something about the past— the past you'd tried to forgotten; the past kageyama was trying to mend. it was not because of the sudden professional relationship created by the both of you.
(it actually also was that.)
the ride was short— maybe five songs had passed and three ad breaks. he parks just at the side, where he wouldn't be told off, and you unbuckled your seatbelt.
"thanks for the ride," you say, finally. he sucks in a breath of relief.
"no problem." and just when you're about to reach out and leave, he puts his hand on your wrist again. you stop on your movements, looking back at him over your shoulder.
"is something the matter?"
"why'd you take it?" kageyama asks, his hand still on your wrist. you blink at him, sitting back down and resting your back on the car seat. but his hand now hovers over your burning skin.
your eyebrows furrow. "what do you mean?"
"why'd you take the job if it sounded stupid?"
you look into his eyes. kageyama looked unsure— almost in disbelief. he seems to be doubting you at this moment which almost brings a scoff out of you. his bottom lip is quickly bitten, a habit of anxiousness.
"i told you– it's a starter job. it's not easy to get a job while i'm still in college. i kinda need the money as soon as possible too, y'know? i'm not exactly a pro athlete so i don't get paid—"
"why are you helping me?" he urges. kageyama leans over the transmission, a hand on the wheel. his elbow is placed on the shoulder of your seat, and he's unbelievably close to you that you feel his hot breath. "you could've taken a job at a cafe. tsukishima could've helped you with it. or yachi-san. so why did you accept my last minute offer?"
it was like he was searching for a reason for your sudden acceptance at an incredulous offer for a job that he made up. he wanted to know the reason behind it— maybe something that could get his hopes up on fixing a relationship that's barely even there; something that could feed on his nightly routine of delusions about you and what could have been.
your eyes flicker between his. kageyama has always had intense eyes. too intense that you can't decipher what he's actually feeling sometimes. but even so, they're the only ones you're forcing yourself to look at— because he's so close. there's barely any friendly proximity between the two of you. you're afraid of glancing down his lips to avoid any miscommunication; you don't look at anywhere else because you don't want to seem shy.
your heart starts to beat faster. you curse it.
"because you're my friend," you murmur. "and i'm actually concerned about your obsession with volleyball."
kageyama leans back just the slightest, but you can still feel his heat.
"i've always wanted to help you lessen your obsession since high school, y'know? at least this time i'm– i'm getting paid."
"you still want to help me even after—"
"i don't want to talk about it, kageyama."
it seems as if you knew what he was going to say. the sudden use of his surname, the softness that immediately hardened at the memory flashing in your mind; the guard you instantly put up. kageyama's heart twinges, leaning back on his seat.
he expects you to leave him and slam the door, watching you walk towards your building.
instead, he feels your hand on his.
your hand on his.
his head snaps to you, twitching slightly. your fingers squeeze the back of his hand a little, offering him a sad smile.
"i care for you," you say. "i hope you don't abuse it again."
kageyama feels like he's been holding his breath for years.
you exit his car and close it properly, crossing the front and enter your building. he watches you disappear behind the doors of your elevator, and he thinks you may have been looking at him as well.
the feeling you leave on his hand remains. he puts it on his chest, placing his other hand on top of it, and feels the way his heart skips multiple beats that he considers rushing to the hospital.
nervous. guilt. an unfamiliar sensation on his belly that rises up to his chest filled with heat.
he does not want to fuck this up.
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reblogs and feedback are appreciated <3
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voidcat · 12 days
Text
— to tug and pull (at the strings; and of my heart)
characters: Endo Yamato, you
notes & wc: 3.1k. Endo as his own warning kinda. Themes of loneliness in a crowd, shitty friend group and Endo taking advantage of it. Toxic relationship all over. Implied past sexual encounters if you squint. Suggestive content a little by the end. GN! Reader but mentions of wearing heeled shoes (Endo is into it). Reader isn’t as good of a person as theyre making themselves out to be btw lol
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“Well well… look who’s there…”
A voice comes from behind you, so clear amidst the crowd of various sounds. The place is loud and crowded- yet the chaos of rising sounds are all muffled down by your ears.
The night, as young as it may be, has already fallen for you and with everyone else to their own world; the same old superficial, banal and tedious things, you’re left alone with your own thoughts— or so you thought until the all too familiar, annoying voice creeps up from behind you.
Great- Because the last thing you needed on this damned night was Endo fucking Yamato ruining your already bothersome day.
“Now what’s with the face?” Endo coos, arms resting against his head “a smile would’ve suited that pretty face of yours better.”
You let out a grunt at his words and roll your eyes, averting your gaze to your phone. It’s not like you have any urgent business but you don’t have any better of a quick excuse you can make up and act right there.
Endo doesn’t seem fazed by your clear dismissal of him, he is quite amused on the contrary. So he stands there and waits, patiently.
Rhythmic shake of your foot to the music evolves into tapping it against the floor and by the second Endo can tell you’re growing impatient.
“What a merry group of friends, wouldn’t you agree?” He begins and jumps over the couch’s backseat to seat himself beside you, legs dangling off the armrest at a weird angle.
“You’re sitting all by yourself by the side, no one to care nor even notice your lack of presence in their conversations.” He clicks his tongue with a shake of his head, disapproving of the state you’re currently in.
“I mean… really now,” honey laced words come out, one hand slowly working up its way to your shoulder. “What a bunch of losers, and they’re supposed to be what— your friends?” He says the words with disgust, “they don’t even see you, let alone notice your boyfriend dropping by~”
“You are not my boyfriend.” You snap at him, saying each word with malice. 
So that gets your attention huh. Endo enjoys the poison in your words, relishes in the taste. It’s only the appetizer after all.
“I’m a boy and your friend, no?” He says innocently, bringing a finger to his lips. 
“No!” You retort, a tad louder than you intended, “you’re not my friend, you are not my anything!” 
Yet your words reach his ears as something melodic, nothing coherent. 
He makes himself comfortable on the couch, fixing up his posture a little but still maintaining skin contact with you no matter how many times you shrug his hand off.
You deserve a drink, you muse. But the logical part of your brain protests. You’ve digested all you’ve eaten for dinner already. Drinking on an empty stomach is not a nice experience to have. And it’s certainly not a wise choice to make when someone such as Endo is within your parameters.
So you opt for the next best thing and gulp down cold water like it is electrolytes.
Even if he notices, he makes no move. He has probably raised an eyebrow at your sudden actions and examining the situation before his eyes to decide what course to take next.
“I’m a closer candidate to being your friend than they are though.”
Ah, there it is. The silence breaker he saved to hit at the right moment, in the hopes of you- what- suddenly break in front of him? Your eyes filling up with tears so uncontrollable whatever touch up you’ve applied to your face will wash off? What does he think of you?
And more importantly- does he really think so lowly of you? Stupid enough to fall for his measly tricks?
There is no situation to assess but certainly enough of an excuse to just call it a night and bail out.
These are not the crowd of people you’d choose to hang out with no matter the time and place but the circumstances call for mutual interests. Every lamb by their leg or however the saying goes. You’d much rather be somewhere else, preferably kilometers away from this loud place and away from him.
You do not want to give him what he wants but the story writes itself before him already. The script plays itself out. There is a stranger by the table sitting all too comfortably next to their supposed friend and none of them seems to notice nor care. It’s not like their noticing would’ve changed things were he to show up a few hours before. They would've chalked it up as someone you just act around with a little Coquetry. Starting off as cold and distant but indulging his teasings under the table, disgusting.
You can feel Endo’s eyes going up and down, giving you a one-over and inspecting everything you have on, down to the buttons. He may be keeping that mouth of his shut for now, but that’s the case with him, his silence is loud, always at the times you least need him to be. Fine, he can ogle all he wants- that's the most he is getting in this damned place. And it's not like you didn't dress up… can't blame the man for once actually,
The air may not be chilling or hanging off your skin but times like these make you wish you were smoking. Just a way to pass the time, to keep your hands busy. the cloud of smoke would occasionally cover las stupid face, granting you the illusion of a night headache free. Blowing the smoke right into his face would be risky though. He could take it up as you being playful with him.
With a cigarette dangling off your lips or hanging between your fingers and gaze focused on something far behind where no one can see, you could’ve been the quiet and mysterious figure.
But instead you’re just you, a sad lonely pathetic person who doesn’t even allow themselves the courtesy of being drunk.
To hell with it, you push yourself off your seat swiftly and let the night air crash into your lungs. They can handle a little multiplication on their own, put two and two together, extract one.
And with it, you get out of the place without looking back, letting the music drown and be replaced with the street chatter.
Despite the hour and the day, it is quite lively out there, though a bit scattered.
When sudden rain comes pouring down, some groups of people ran and hid away to whatever crook they could find, staying there until the sun comes up.
It is late, but not for someone your age. Everyone outside is having fun, laughing around, walking to their next destination to do god knows what and here you are, heels clicking against the tiles, searching for a market with your eyes. 
You’re certain someone would make a joke about your state now, “they should’ve been at the club, not spiraling down a waterfall of isolating thoughts” but you are you and as for all to see, this is the situation you’re stuck with for the foreseeable future.
The night is young, younger than you’ll ever feel.
And the fact pisses you off deeply. Add to the equation the nasty hit of hunger and all you’ll have left in the pot is a very grumpy, lonely person.
At some point during your hurried walk, you're acquired a bottle of water. Opening the cap, you down the liquid in two quick gulps. The cold water meeting the surface of your stomach, you're reminded rather cruelly that water holds no nutritious value and your poor body is resenting the fact.
You have water at the very least. And hey it is Important to focus on the good, rather than dwelling on the what - could-have- been's. You're out of the tedious place and still young. Not dying of thirst nor a broken heel and best of all not pinned to the wall of that place's bathroom under Endo's hungry eyes, body trapped between the mirror and his.
As you take a step grander than the previous ones, you miscalculate– as you’ve been doing all night long, and step into the little puddle of water instead. Your face scrunches up in disgust, not checking to see how clear the water was.
Why did you think it was a good idea to wear something with heels today? Miscalculations and foolish decisions… you go for comfort above all for a reason, after all.
As you walk, you try not to press onward with the overgrowing nasty thoughts, regarding yourself and regarding life.
So what if you’re not living life as expected of you? You do not owe anything to anyone. You know this, deep down in your chest you believe in the fact, but with each step you take and each face you pass by in a blur in all your sole glory; it loses its credibility by the minute.
The night is young yet you’ve used up all your time, already far too late, already so behind everyone else– and worse of all, all by yourself.
You clutch the water bottle in your hands until it makes a loud noise and the sharp edges of the plastic begin to cut into your skin and only then you find it in you to breathe again.
But you are not alone, are you? At least not in the physical sense.
Because as your brain runs a mile per second, your feet hurting and bones begging for a rest, Endo Yamato trails right behind you, hands in his pockets and his steps on the same spots as you’ve stepped.
You are not alone, no, not when Yamato follows after you like a lost little puppy, careful enough to maintain his distance so as to not get yelled at, close enough to keep you at bay.
An uneasy feeling begins to grow inside you, saying you know how this story will end, again.
That’s the thing with Yamato, you muse, as you take the escalator and wait. Despite his claims, he knows how to get under one’s skin, knowing exactly what to tell and how to say it. He sweetens his voice, lolls the words and bats his lashes at you– or the occasional ‘hit ‘em where they’re weak’; once he gets inside someone’s head, it's hard getting him out.
And You find yourself despising Yamato for all the wrong reasons.
Perhaps that’s where the true irony of it lies, just two hypocrites, the two of you are.
You blink and watch the swarm of people making their way to the door, the short train ride coming to a finale for you. Compared to the rest of your day, it was perhaps the most peaceful moment you’ve had to yourself. 
The bright lights show when the next train will be arriving as well as the time– 23:12, still moments away from calling the night to an end.
5 minutes by train makes a stark difference, as you are met with the familiar darkness and silence. Here, the people are much calmer, there is no rush, nor guilt for not living your life like they do. Here, you can just exist and carry out the life of an elderly and no one would bat an eye at it.
Yet, the silence is predatory, and the darkness goes beyond being just a comfort. You know better than to trust something just because you have fond memories of it.
Maybe that’s the thing with you, a part of the same darkness, cut from the same clothing. Knowing you’re walking right into your impending doom and still going along with it.
Yamato has been uncharacteristically silent behind you the whole time, you acknowledge after a while. Because for the two of you, it is a game he plays, and the thrill he enjoys. The back and forth bickering; he will sing you praises he wouldn't say to anyone else and you'll answer back with insults crafted and designed just for him— it always gets him giddy with glee, saying there is care and attention to your words despite acting the opposite. He is odd, and that's just it. No matter what you do or dont, there is always something greater to your actions, he seems to think.
Yamato’s attention burns like fire, you’ve learned through simple observations and have steered clear ever since.
As much as it is flattering, that’s the thing with him. Give in and he will lose interest, refuse and he will be infatuated.
He likes the types he cannot crack, the ones he cannot mold into the shape he aches, the one’s he cannot predict– though for this, he claims it hasn’t been much of an issue when he’s ‘this bad of a read at people’, or so he says.
There are lies within your course of thinking, but a light pink has never dirtied anything.
You know to keep your measure and keep him at an arm's length, maybe not physically but always metaphorically. It’s the things people cannot reach oh-so-easily that draws him in and it’s those that don’t buy his advances that attract him.
You really should’ve just pretended to care back then, you’d have done yourself a favor if your stupid ass wasn't so adamant on honesty. But you cannot blame your younger self, not really. Not when it’s been this long already.
When Yamato picks you up with your feet off the ground, you feel as if a weight has been lifted off your soul.
You knew how the story was going to end yet you stalled either way, allowing yourself so– your train of thoughts come to a halt when you feel Yamato’s lips on your neck, sucking on the flesh in a manner you can only label ‘trying to do gently’. With arms at both sides, holding you firm for support, Yamato takes small breaks inbetween his nibbling to take a deep breath of your skin. You can hear him scoof when his nose tickles more front areas, probably disappointed by the use of perfume for masking your natural scent.
Even such a small thing makes you feel odd– would make you feel hot were it anyone else. You just cannot give Yamato the satisfaction of knowing he is good at it.
At least the scenery of the final scene changes. This is levels better than making out at the restaurant bathroom, on your toes for any potential users, not to mention more hygienic–
Fingers pinch at your skin by your left, and you're back on earth, he must’ve guessed you getting lost in your thoughts again.
What a greedy man, you think, offering to give you his all and still demanding your attention in return.
Yamato presses his entire body weight onto you and waits for the slightest of moan leaving your lips, all ears just to hear you react to him.
And you do, just not in the way he can see or would be happy with. And you would, but you’d rather die than give him the satisfaction of it.
Pushing you further, he secures you with one hand and allows the other to linger on your body. Tracing your legs, dragging his nails and losing himself at your hitched breath.
When you are eye to eye, you can see the absolute bliss in his expression. It is a flattering feeling to know this is all your doing, just by solely existing.
Things have been progressing like this between the two of you for a while now. And as much as you’d love to complain, you cannot deny it benefits you both; Yamato can devote and give all his love and affection to someone open to receiving, and you take it all in like the greedy thing you are, allowing him the courtesy of loving you but not returning it. His love only fuels the fire further, and you burn it all up at a rapid speed.
In the end it all works out. And that's the thing, isn't it ? A beneficial affair for both parties and a nice outlet on the days you feel so worked up over even the smallest thing.
“Stop it” you say and push his face off. e looks at you with surprise.
Oh, Yamato wasn't expecting your patience to burn up this quickly.
Save for the face now hovering few centimeters away, he disturbs not a single thing to his position, enjoying your body against his and your legs dangling at both sides of his waist.
Like this, he almost resembles a child. Blue eyes looking up at you with a childish gIee and glint to them. You're the untouchable cookie jar, far high up in the cabinets. The years old liquor only ever savored on the most sacred of days. 
Yamato looks at you like no human would to anyone else.
Letting out a sigh, you lightly flick his nose off. “You're doing it all wrong. Too sloppy and on the same location.“ because he is awaiting instructions, your input, all the words you're willing to give him. 
 “Such a deep drop in performance doesn't suit you.” you half heartedly joke, and his face lights up in an instant as if you've just made the sun rise.
“Then allow me to atone for my sins.” He whispers to your lips and kisses your lips.
Yamato always kisses you like a man starving and you respond to him barely. 
With slow, deep kisses, he nips at the parts of your lips you've bitten before, tasting your blood on your lips. His hands begin to roam your figure and one finds the nape of your neck, drawing circles into your skin as a way to soothe and pull you closer to him.
When he feels you kissing him back, he doesn't let the moment take him by surprise, cannot afford to stall even for a second and deny you of the pleasure you're deserving.
So close yet so distant, and in the end you're both getting what you needed. There is nothing wise about indulging in him but you've started to reach a point with no care for anything.
The coldness of the night disperses as your bodies begin to warm up, all your aches forgotten in the back of your mind.
Between the shadows and the quiet of the town, Endo Yamato seeks heaven in you once more, and you allow him to give as much as he is willing.
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mypoisonedvine · 1 year
Note
Possessive Eddie, maybe around Rick or after a party
ps. LOVE YOU GUYS <3
GETTING TO THIS LATE but it's cuteeee omg
eddie's possessive in a sweet way in this, not dark or controlling! but warnings for implied smut, insecurities, mentions of smoking and drinking, and mentions of semi-public sex lol
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You noticed that he was acting different after you tagged along to a run to Rick's; but you liked the extra attention, so you didn't say anything.
You noticed, too, the way he would get extra touchy and affectionate when you mentioned hanging out with Steve or catching up with the guys you used to share your crayons with in elementary school. Still, you didn't say anything, and you didn't quite notice the connection.
But he was all over you during Steve's party. It started the second he saw you-- he said you looked hot, which you certainly appreciated, but then it's like he couldn't keep his hands off you. You couldn't even go get a drink or take a smoke break without him clinging to you like crazy.
"What's gotten into you, barnacle?" you giggled as Eddie nuzzled into your neck from behind, mumbling something about if you were wearing new perfume or if you just smelled better than he remembered.
"Barnacle?" he repeated.
"You're all up on my stern!" you explained, and Eddie laughed a little as he wrapped his arms around you.
"Well sorr-yyy," he whined, "just wanna touch my girl, s'that a crime?"
"No," you replied, "but you always get like this when we go out anywhere. Steve may not invite us to parties anymore if I keep wearing you to them."
"So? Then we can just stay home and I can touch you even more," he purred, leaning in to kiss your face, but you pushed him back slightly as you knitted your brows together.
"What's your deal, Munson? Do you think if somebody sees me alone for a half-second they're gonna think I'm single and ask me out or something?" you wondered.
Eddie got really quiet, which was always a sign of trouble, and your eyes went wide.
"Oh, shit-- did I really get it on the first guess?" you realized.
"It's-- it's not that! Uh, not exactly..." he mumbled, looking away.
"You know I would totally shut down anybody who tried to come onto me, right?" you assured. "Just because someone thought I was single wouldn't mean--"
"No, no, I know," he shook his head, "s'not that I don't trust you. I'm just.... I'm so proud of you, y'know? And yeah, it drives me a little crazy when other guys look at you, I like reminding them they don't stand a chance-- 'cause you've got me. And I wanna remind you of that, too."
You smirked. "I'm not really at any risk of forgetting that, Ed, especially with you on me like white on rice all night."
"I'm not trying to smother you," he promised, "just want everybody in Hawkins to know you're my girl. Shit, I want everybody in the whole world to know! I bet most of 'em still couldn't believe it, that a loser like me got a girl like you."
"Please," you rolled your eyes incredulously.
"No, I'm serious!" he laughed. "Everyone already thought I was doing witchcraft before, but now that I've got you?"
He didn't even finish the thought fully, but you laughed, too, and pulled him closer by the shirt to kiss his cheek. "Okay, stud, you really want everyone to know I'm yours?" you challenged, seeing one of his eyebrows raise. "How about you take me to one of the Harringtons' half-dozen guest bathrooms and make me say your name loud enough for this whole party to hear?"
He purred as he pulled you closer at the hips. "Sounds like a deal."
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imfinereallyy · 1 year
Note
#38 "i was eavesdropping and i heard something i can’t scrub from my memory" sounds like it could be very funny, especially from a kid's perspective!
you read my mind, it 100% needs be a kid POV, sorry this one is a bit shorter than my usual but it was fun to write. *it actually ended up being longer than I thought cause I have a problem with not knowing when enough is enough lol* ♡
find the request game here
Lucas was going to throw up. He liked to think he had a strong stomach, he really truly did, but this was too much even for him.
“What the hell is your problem?” Max asked him as he came back to Steve’s living room.
“Yea you look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Will pipes up, head leaning on his knee.
Lucas swallowed dryly, he had to phrase this carefully. “Well I was eavesdropping…”
Max snorted from her seat on the couch. “You Lucas Sinclair was eavesdropping? Didn’t think I’d ever see the day. What about the whole ‘respect people’s boundaries’ thing you rave about?”
“And I still stand by that! It’s just I didn’t want to interrupt and…” Lucas thought back to a few minutes ago. He had gone into the kitchen to grab Max an ice pack; she was having a bad hip day. When he had reached the door, he had heard Steve and Eddie talking, and it had sounded serious. Lucas felt bad about interrupting, but he also couldn’t go back to Max without the ice pack. They had been good for months now, and he didn’t want to risk it. (He knew this was ridiculous considering they weren’t really that dysfunctional, and she loved him, a reluctant secret smile confession on her end. But there was this deep part of Lucas who was terrified of disappointing her). So he was content with waiting outside the door until they were done.
Lucas really should have turned around and left.
“What if they don’t…want to be around us Stevie?” Eddie whispered.
“Baby they are just kids. They are good kids. They are our friends. They won’t be upset.” Steve murmured back.
This was the point Lucas should have turned around, but he was confused and wanted to understand.
“You aren’t even the slightest bit worried, that maybe they won’t be accepting? I don’t think any of them have been exposed to gay culture, let alone two men dating?”
Oh. Oh no. This was really private. Lucas should have really turned around but at that point, his feet were glued to the ground.
“I mean yea a little bit…they are shitheads. Especially Mike—“ Lucas had to hold back a snort, “—but they are good. It’s why we are friends with them. As much as it pains me to admit we are friends with children.”
Lucas wished he could see their faces.
“What if…what if they are more than shitheads this time?” Lucas had never heard Eddie’s voice sound so small.
“…do you want to wait a little longer?” Steve’s voice asked gently, with no anger.
“If that’s okay. I just…want to live in our bubble a little longer. Well our bubble plus Robin.” Lucas imagined Eddie biting his hair in that moment.
“Yea baby. We take this at the pace you need. And Robin already knows, which is pretty much the only person I can’t keep a secret from. And I like our little bubble too.” Lucas heard shuffling around, like fabric reaching around itself.
“Yea?”
“Yea. I think I can go a little longer without the twerps making gagging noises every time we kiss. We can wait to tell them we’re together.”
“Hmmmm should we do a practice show right now, to prepare for when we need to freak them out?” Eddie’s voice turned suddenly flirty.
“I like the way you think.” This was the last words Lucas heard before the sounds of the two of them clearly heavily making out came through the doorway. It was at the first moan that Lucas ran away.
Lucas was brought back to reality when Max snapped her fingers in his face. “Want to share with the class loser?”
Oh god, Lucas was gonna throw up at the memory.
It wasn’t the fact that they were men and that they were dating. Lucas was, in fact, really happy for them. He had never thought about it, but in a weird way, it made sense. He wanted them to be happy. And if he was really being honest with himself, he was hoping maybe this would get Max to stop staring at Steve when he doesn’t have a shirt on (a few months later, Lucas would be horribly proven wrong of this theory).
It wasn’t this kissing that made him want to vomit either. Sure, the idea of his older brother figure making out with his dungeon master wasn’t a pleasant thought, but he had witness Mike make out with El, so he was pretty immune to grossness.
No, the problem was Lucas realized with great certainty he was going to have to keep a secret.
He gagged at the thought.
Sure, he could keep a whole other dimension and government conspiracy theory a secret from his parents (and, ya know, the world), but he caved relatively quickly when it came to Max. And Max could tell whenever he was lying. But Lucas wasn’t stupid; he knew you couldn’t just tell other people that someone you know is gay. He didn't know the word for it, maybe there wasn’t one, but Lucas knew what it was like to be different. He didn’t want to make Steve and Eddie feel bad, or cause others to be mean to them. He didn’t think the rest of the party would care about the gay? Bisexual? Queer?—wait, that’s a bad word, Lucas thought—it didn’t matter what specifically, but he didn’t think they would care about the gay stuff—more like Lucas knew his friends. El and Max would have a million, invasive questions. Mike would be a dick, but not for serious reasons. More like “I have weird insecurities” reasons. It would probably be good for Will (again, Lucas isn’t stupid). And Dustin, holy shit, he would most definitely either be pissed he didn’t know sooner, or would rub it in everyone’s face that he made it happen. Both of which Lucas knew would be horrible reactions.
God, he was going to throw up. He was going to lie to his friends. His girlfriend. He couldn’t just share this secret. It would go horrible if he told, it’s not his secret! His stupid, stupid friends (not El and Max) would blow up if it came from him first. And then Eddie and Steve would be upset, he told, and they would think that the party hated them for something out of their control, even though they love them no matter what! And oh god, he’s gonna have to lie so much—
He was spiraling, he needed to calm down.
“Lucas?” Max’s face suddenly softened, like she knew he was having a hard time getting the words together. Lucas looked at her face, and took a couple of seconds to count her freckles but lost track quickly. He didn’t mind; he would to start again later. He followed the laugh lines around her eyes that weren’t there last year, and thought about trying to make her laugh.
Max said nothing as he stared, even as the guys pressed him to answer. It was strange, he was terrified of lying to Max, but he knew deep down she would understand. That she would know he was lying but wouldn’t call him out on it.
“I was eavesdropping and I heard something I can’t erase from my memory. I almost walked in on Steve giving sex advice to Eddie, so I walked away before it got gross. I forgot your ice pack; I’m sorry.” Lucas apologized; he did genuinely feel bad he didn’t succeed on his mission.
The guys started chattering behind him, asking questions and yelling out in disgust, but Max stayed quiet for a second, then said, “It’s okay, stalker. Didn’t have high hopes for you anyway. You always get distracted.”
Lucas sent her a grateful smile, and pretended to be offended. “Are you saying I don’t finish what I’ve started? You should know better, Max.”
Max threw her head back, and full body laughed. She scooped Lucas’ hand and wove her pale fingers between his. “That’s me being nice, Lucas. Don’t go around telling people that. Or I’ll have to up the ante.”
Lucas kissed the back of her hand and whispered, “Maybe I like it when you’re a little mean.”
Max blushed and looked to check if the guys were paying attention (they weren’t; they were still arguing over sex they weren’t having), and leaned over to give him a soft kiss on the cheek. Max didn’t ask any questions even though Lucas knew she knew he was lying.
Lucas didn’t let go of her hand, and quietly hoped that Eddie made Steve feel the way Max made him feel.
He deserved something special like that.
**
I need you guys to know that I had to keep backtracking to correct boys into guys, cause I’m so used to writing from an older persons perspective. But I wanted some steddie and lumax mixed together. And Lucas! Deserves! More! Attention!!!
thank you so much for the ask I had so much fun with this one.
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juyeonszn · 9 months
Text
CLUMSY
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PAIRING ju haknyeon x f!reader
WORD COUNT 6.03k
GENRES smut ﹒fluff
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, reader and juhak are bio lab partners, juhak is lowkey a bit of a loser BUT DW HE REDEEMS HIMSELF, mentions of alcohol, a game of rage cage…, he’s down insanely bad, the flirting goes kinda crazy, someone calls the cops, they run from said cops, reader is Nawt wasting any time, pet names (juhak calls reader princess), tbh they’re both switches in some ways, kitchen sex, oral sex (f!receiving), fingering, edging, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, creampie lol
SUMMARY when haknyeon ran into you at a tbz party for the first time, he didn’t think he would fall for you so quickly. or literally. or both simultaneously. but there’s a first time for everything, he supposes.
MORE andddddd here we go 🫡 second fic of the black out or back out collab 🙏 i forgot to link the masterlist in the last one so im gonna link it in this one in case u wanna read any of the others!! ANYWAY i had such a fun time writing this one, any excuse i get to write for juhak, i will take trust <3 if u enjoyed, don’t forget to reblog! and pls check out the other fics so far!!
PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @deoboyznet @cloverdaisies @vernyangel
TAGLIST @millksea
SERIES MASTERLIST
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Okay. So maybe trying to secure a girlfriend at a party wasn’t exactly Haknyeon’s best idea.
But, hey. You had to give him some credit. At least he was making an attempt. Most of his other frat brothers weren’t even making an effort. They seemed perfectly satisfied with charming their ways into random girls’ pants every weekend. Unfortunately, or fortunately considering he was a gentleman, Haknyeon wasn’t into that sort of thing.
It was just a little embarrassing that Kim Sunwoo’s love life had more progress than his own. Sunwoo was literally the resident loser bitch boy of the TBZ house. How was he closer to getting a girlfriend than he was? It made absolutely no sense.
Ju Haknyeon thought of himself as a catch. He was pretty neat, his room was cleaner than most guys’ his age. He knew how to cook basic meals, again, more than the average college sophomore. His car wasn’t on its last leg. (Cough cough… Kim Sunwoo, I’m looking at you.) He was a decent dude. He supported women’s rights and wrongs!
Apparently that was not enough these days.
“…And I need you to make sure the fridge is stocked completely. I’m not trying to drink my coffee without cream tomorrow morning because some idiot drank it while they were drunk.” Sangyeon commands, typing something furiously on his phone as some of the other guys move around the furniture.
“Bruh, I was in charge of buying everything last time. Why can’t someone else do it?” Kevin groans. Something else that wasn’t Haknyeon’s best idea? Walking into the kitchen during this very conversation. “What about JuHak? He looks like he has nothing better to do.”
“Yeah, whatever. That’s fine. Hak, I’m airdropping you the list.” Sangyeon waves his hand in dismissal, returning to his extensive presidential duties.
The sophomore deadpans, but doesn’t have the energy to argue back. You know, the usual fraternity was just a bunch of rich guys with more money than the tuition of each TBZ brother combined. However, the Tau Beta Zeta house was not your usual fraternity. It really was just a bunch of normal dudes thrown together. Though, Lee Sangyeon ran it like it was the fucking Navy.
Haknyeon accepts his defeat and grabs his things, heading out to the supermarket to shop for tonight’s party. Alcohol duty sucked more than door duty, in his opinion. You were sent out all alone, tasked with bringing back enough liquor and beer to last until early hours of the morning. It was a near impossible mission, unless you were Kevin Moon and good at practically everything in the world.
He pushes around the shopping cart mindlessly, though he knows he’ll have to make another trip. A long sigh leaves his lips as he enters the alcohol aisle. He fills the bottom of the cart with different cases of beer until he thinks he may drop one, and then starts to place things in the basket. He feels like a dumbass hauling it over to the registers, like everyone can see right through him.
He has to remind himself that this is for a good cause, that it’ll be worth it when everyone is enjoying themselves at the party. His actions won’t be in vain. Even after the second trip with another cart full of beer and various liquor bottles, Haknyeon keeps repeating affirmations in his head. This has to be the party.
In fact, he thinks his thoughts have manifested into reality when he sees you walking into the grocery store at the same time he’s leaving. You’re his pretty Bio lab partner. He’s always too nervous to hold a substantial conversation with you, so he settles for the bare minimum, which is unfulfilling small talk during your labs. It’s never what he needs though. Aside from your name, Haknyeon knows nothing about you.
“Y/N?” What he wants right now, however, is to shoot himself in the foot for sounding so unsure.
You glance up from your phone, a smile lighting up your face when you recognize him. “Haknyeon! Hey! What’s up?”
“Last minute preparations for the TBZ party tonight,” he gestures at his shopping cart with pursed lips. “You?”
“That’s so funny that you say that! My friends and I are going—“ You eye his cart with confusion. “Wait, I didn’t know you were in Tau Beta Zeta.”
“Yeah…” Haknyeon laughs awkwardly. “Surprise!”
You giggle, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t seem like the frat boy type. Then again, TBZ isn’t your average frat so, I guess that kinda adds up.”
Haknyeon’s not sure if he should take that as a compliment or not, but since it’s coming from you, he decides that he will. The realization that you mentioned you’d be attending the party finally sets in at that same moment. “So, I’ll see you later, then?”
You nod, smile widening. “Yeah, I’m just grabbing a bottle for us to bring with. But I’ll be there. Maybe we’ll bump into each other.”
God, he hopes so. This is the perfect opportunity for him to swoop in and learn everything he’s been dying to know about you. His tongue pokes the inside of his cheek. “I don’t know… I’m a busy man. It might be a little hard.”
That cute little laugh of yours makes another appearance. “I’ll be on the lookout, don’t worry. See you tonight, Haknyeon.”
Ju Haknyeon thinks that he must’ve done something monumental in a past life, like saving a dog from a burning building or stopping a world war. How else would the universe reward him this kindly? All he can do is wave as you maneuver around an elderly couple passing by into the store.
Maybe Kevin Moon wasn’t that bad. And maybe Lee Sangyeon wasn’t as big of a tyrant as he made him out to be. He could actually kiss the ground they walked on for forcing him into alcohol duty. If it weren’t for them, he wouldn’t have ran into you and he wouldn’t have known you were attending the party. Now he has something to look forward to that isn't getting shitfaced.
“What the hell are you wearing?”
Haknyeon looks away from his mirror, Hyunjae standing in the doorway. He has a cringe on his face at the sight of his outfit. It wasn’t the worst thing he’s ever worn, but it was… a bit too much. A black button up and black slacks was admittedly not the best frat party fit. The only good thing he had going for him was his hair that was styled for once, parted so his bangs framed his face nicely.
“This girl I’m kinda into is coming tonight. I need to look irresistible.” The younger explains, arms flailing at his sides.
“Okay, well you won’t accomplish that in this,” Hyunjae snorts, digging through his closet. “If she’s into you too, she won’t care what you’re wearing. Just throw on something you’d normally wear. Like… this! This is nice.”
Hyunjae holds up a black t-shirt and a black-washed denim jacket. Haknyeon hums. It was simple, but also once he put it on he wouldn’t feel like a douchebag, which was the whole goal here. Paired with some khaki cargo pants, he’s found a winner. He begrudgingly thanks his senior for the assistance, shooing him out of his bedroom so he can mentally prepare for the night ahead of him.
He doesn’t even know what to bring up now that he really tosses the idea around in his head. Yeah, he wants to learn more about you and what you’re like outside of your Bio lab, but specifically what he couldn’t say. Haknyeon was starting to feel like a lost cause. He had to clutch up tonight. He had to woo you so much that you had no choice but to fall for his cute face and endearing personality. But how was he meant to do that if he couldn’t even come up with topics to talk with you about?
Maybe he was just thinking too far into things. Perhaps he should just let it all go with the flow. Moving at an au natural pace was probably his best bet in comparison to Sunwoo’s soccer ball plan. (He’s still confused how that worked in his favor.)
Before he knows it, the party is swinging into full effect. This is the first time Haknyeon’s ever been so socially aware of his surroundings. He had a habit of blurring his atmosphere at these things, more interested in getting drunk with his buddies than paying attention to the attendees. As he stands in a corner of the living room, listening to Chanhee complain about treasurer stuff, he watches each and every person who enters the house.
When you finally do walk in, he has to physically stop himself from choking on the beer in his cup, biting the rim of the plastic in a weak attempt to sedate himself. If he thought you were gorgeous before in a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt, he doesn’t know what to call you now. You’re laughing at something one of your friends said, dolled up in a black mini skirt and a black cropped halter top while hugging a bottle of Pink Whitney to your chest. He could probably pass out right here right now.
He almost does, but then Chanhee is slapping his back aggressively. “Wipe the drool off of your chin. God, am I the only one who still has a brain?”
“Shut the fuck up, Chanhee, go cry about your life somewhere else.” Haknyeon dismisses his senior, downing the rest of his drink for some liquid courage. Though he is, he doesn’t want to seem too desperate, so he’s not going up to you this quickly. Instead, he heads into the kitchen to get another drink, rolling his neck like he’s preparing for the biggest win of the century.
It’s as he’s pouring some jungle juice into a fresh cup that you see him. A smile similar to the one from the store graces your features. There was only one person with a back like that, and it was your cute lab partner. You keep an arm wrapped around your bottle, tapping his shoulder lightly. He spins around confusedly, but the expression morphs into pleasant surprise immediately after.
“Pink Whitney? Easy choice,” he points at the bottle in your grasp. “Are you a lightweight, Y/N?”
Your cheeks warm up at the teasing remark. Upon first meeting, Haknyeon’s been an awkward mess around you. You can only assume the confidence stems from the fact that he’s within his element. “That’s for me to know, and you to find out.”
“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were implying that you want me to get you drunk.” He tucks a hand into one of his jacket pockets, the other bringing his cup to his mouth. He’s unconscious of the source of this sudden bravery, but he prays it doesn’t fade off anytime soon.
“Maybe I do…” You bite your lip, undoing the seal of the Pink Whitney bottle to take a sip. It burns your throat slightly. “I’ve never hung out with a frat boy before. I kinda wanna see what the hype is all about.”
Haknyeon thinks he might pass out again, because if he wasn’t so acutely aware of your entire interaction, he would think you’re flirting with him. Friendliness was a double edged sword in this day and age. But who knows, maybe you are flirting. You showed up with your friends but they were nowhere to be found now. He needed to take advantage of the opening.
It’s around this time that Younghoon and Juyeon are bringing out the fated beer pong table, a crowd already beginning to form nearby. He feels sorry for the poor suckers who have to play Changmin and his girlfriend.
“We should play beer pong!” You suggest, watching the pair of taller guys setting up the cups over his shoulder. Haknyeon can sense the color draining from his face. If it had been anyone else, he would’ve shut the idea down insanely fast, but because it was you, he was genuinely contemplating. Those who went up against the infamous TBZ party beer pong champions were in for a rude awakening, but if you wanted to...
“Uh—“ He starts but then he’s interrupted.
“Yo! Who’s down to play Rage Cage?!”
Juyeon’s voice is somehow louder than the music, carrying into the kitchen where the two of you stand. Haknyeon wasn’t the greatest Rage Cage player, but he enjoyed it a hell of a lot more than beer pong. Especially when he stood beside people who didn’t understand the concept of the game.
You chug some more Pink Whitney, batting your eyelashes up at Haknyeon. “I’ve never played Rage Cage. Is it fun?”
“If you’re next to the right people it can be, but if you aren’t, then it’s a whole lot of drinking. We haven’t played Rage Cage at a TBZ party in a while, but the last time we did Eric Sohn almost had to get his stomach pumped.” He laughs a little at the memory of his friend spending the rest of his night cuddling with a toilet seat. The mental picture overshadows how enticing you look right now.
“Do you think you can teach me?” You ask sweetly, hoping that he takes the hint. He seemed like the type of guy who wouldn’t make the first move unless you forced him to, so it appeared that you had your work cut out for you.
“You wanna play?” He turns to you with wide eyes, almost as if he hadn’t expected you to show interest in the game. You give him a small nod, tucking some hair behind your ear. The truth of the matter was that you were a fucking liar. You’ve played Rage Cage plenty of times in the past. You were actually pretty decent at it, too. You just needed an excuse to spend the night around him.
“We better head over there now. It looks like the table is filling up.” You jab your pinkie in that general direction. Haknyeon blows a raspberry and leads you that way, his hand resting on the small of your back so he won’t lose you in the pack of people surrounding the table.
“Forewarning, my rap sheet doesn’t really read World Class Rage Cage Champ,” he laughs nervously, the anxiety beginning to eat at him all over again. “But I promise, I won’t let you get stacked.”
When Haknyeon said he wasn’t the worst, but wasn’t good at Rage Cage, you took his word. Except he severely overplayed his own skill. Maybe he was just extremely on edge and it threw off his game, but the amount of times he was stacked on was a little comical. At the very least, he kept his promise. You hadn’t got stacked once, but that was also only because Haknyeon would drink for you every time you almost did.
The room is sort of spinning by the time the first game has finished. Playing a drinking game while he’s trying to get to know you better was probably at the higher portion of his ‘BAD IDEAS!!!’ list. If he wasn’t so eager to please and followed along to each of your suggestions, perhaps he’d be having a different conversation. That was not the case, though.
You can’t help but feel a little guilty for the turn out. All you’d wanted was to flirt with your lab partner, possibly end the night with some making out. As it was looking, that’s not the path you were heading down, but rather towards the kitchen for some water to sober him up some. Your bottle of Pink Whitney is long lost, replaced with a bottle of H2O. You hold his chin, tilting it back slightly to pour some into his mouth.
If he hadn’t already had the fattest crush on you, he definitely did now. Pretty and nice? You were the total package. Here you were, nursing him back to sobriety when you could’ve been out and about enjoying yourself with your friends. Up this close, he gets a detailed look at you. It’s so weird for him to think about how much he’s pined after you since the start of the semester, how much he’s admired the face that’s looking at him with this unfamiliar tenderness. He never thought he stood a chance. You know, that whole ‘nice guys finish last’ pick me boy vibe.
“Y/N—” He’s cut short, Juyeon’s voluminous voice resonating throughout the house again, sans the music.
“Everybody who isn’t Tau Beta Zeta, get the fuck out! Someone called the cops!”
Of course. Nobody ever calls the cops on a TBZ party but of fucking course the one time Haknyeon gets shoot his shot with you, someone narcs. He actually thinks he might die. He might keel over and die in the middle of this party while the cops are raiding the place. Lee Sangyeon is gonna be thrown in the back of a police cruiser for letting people drink underage and then send them his way because he bought all of the alcohol. This was just his luck.
Without a word, you grab his hand and drag him out through the back door. You follow the flock of other party goers escaping the wrath of the police. It’s difficult to run in a mini skirt and strappy heels, but you don’t really have room to whine about it. Haknyeon doesn’t know if there’s ever a right time to tell you that you could’ve just gone up to his room, but figures it’s too late when you're hopping the short fence that goes out to the main street of Greek Row.
One would think that he’d sobered up at this point since he was, you know, on the run from the law. Yet for some reason Ju Haknyeon himself doesn’t even know, he’s still feeling the effects of the alcohol, tripping over that stupid fucking fence and falling flat on his face. Thankfully, he lands on the grassy part just before the sidewalk, but it doesn’t make the situation any less embarrassing.
You don’t give him recovery time, pulling him to his feet. He holds a hand to the side of his face that received the harshest of the impact, expecting to wake up to a nasty bruise tomorrow. He’s also unsure where exactly you’re taking him, but is afraid of asking out of fear that you’ll send his ass back to the frat house and have him arrested or something. (He had a bad habit of over complicating situations and coming up with the worst possible scenarios.)
Once the commotion has died out and there’s no one else around, you slow your pace. You turn to face him with a grin, holding both of his hands in yours as you walk backwards. “Are you cool with staying the night at my place?”
Truly, Haknyeon needs to know what act of nobility he committed in his previous life. He needs to go back in time and thank himself for whatever it was. Even with fumble after fumble, he was somehow bouncing back and receiving major compensation for sticking it out. He swallows thickly, nodding dumbly when he realizes he hasn’t given you a proper response.
“Um… Yeah— I mean— yes. That’s fine. That’s totally fine.” He word-vomits, stumbling over his tongue rather than his feet. Being down bad was one of his strongest personality traits. And being clumsy was second strongest, so you don't even have to imagine how terrible a combination of both would be.
The walk to your apartment knocks any lingering inebriation out of his system. He’s entirely too hyper aware of what’s happening as you guide him in that direction. It’s cooler out, the temperature dropping in the nighttime as the end of the semester approaches. If there was another reason to be grateful for this party, it was because he no longer had to worry about not making a move before your last lab together. As much as he despised Biology, he’d take it every day if it meant getting to see you.
He actually feels like he may throw up as you reach your place, his hands sticking into the pockets of his jacket to hide the clamminess of his palms. His nerves are creeping up on him once more, a dark cloud looming over him. He shouldn’t be this jumpy at this point of the night. He should be composed, prepared to sweep you off your feet after spending so much time with you. Why the hell is he sweating bullets right now?
“Welcome to my humble abode,” you curtsy. “Would you like something to drink? Water, maybe?”
“Th-That would be great,” Haknyeon forces out, waddling behind you into the kitchen like a baby duckling following its mother. “You have a nice apartment.”
“Really? Thank you!” You can’t help but giggle at his jitters and the way he keeps rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet. A sense of déjà vu rushes over you when you pass him a cup. “Living alone has its perks, I guess. I like that I don’t have to argue with anyone about how to decorate and things like that.”
“It sounds a lot more enjoyable than living with a bunch of men in their early twenties,” he smiles weakly as he accepts the glass of water from you. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to how thin the walls are in that house.”
“Do they have sex often?” You ask him bluntly, head cocking to the side almost innocently. He chokes on the water he just sipped, nearly spilling it onto the floor.
“W-What?” He sputters.
“I’m assuming that’s what you’re talking about,” you shrug, facing away from him so you can grab yourself something to drink, also. “We should get back at them.”
You don’t know how many more bones you can throw for him to understand what you're insinuating. Even the frat boy comment you made earlier was intentional. Haknyeon’s mouth goes dry and his eyes widen like a cartoon character’s. What the fuck?
“I’ve never brought a girl back to the house before, because I don’t want them to make fun of me or something— not that I’m saying I would take you back to the house! I mean I just would feel bad if you also got made fun of— not that I’m referring to having sex with you or anything!” The glass in his hands is on the verge of slipping from his grip. “Not that I don’t want to have sex with you— oh my god— um wow, that’s a very lovely fruit bowl you have there I—“
“Hak,” you interject his rambling, wearing a mischievous smile.
The nickname drives him fucking insane. Scratch him possibly dying. If he isn’t dead by the end of the night, he’ll be shocked. Perplexed. Perturbed. Puzzled. Any shock-adjacent synonym you can think of. That will be him. “Y-Yes?”
“Can you shut up and kiss me already?”
Honestly, you don’t have to ask him twice. His lips are on yours in seconds, fingers fisting the material of your skirt at your hips to steel himself. You moan in response to the sheer frenzy behind his actions. It’s so easy to lose yourself in the haste of it; the way you tug at his hair, the blunt edges of his nails digging into your sides, the near clashing of your teeth. He nibbles at your bottom lip, sighing when you allow his tongue to permeate your mouth. He’s content to do nothing but this, kissing you is enough to satiate the desire he’s harbored for you for months. However, with the franticness of your kiss, he knows you want more.
He inches you both backwards until your lower back hits the counter, and then he’s cupping beneath your thighs to hoist you up. His strength sends tidal waves pulsing throughout your whole being, hurriedly pushing the material of his denim jacket off of his shoulders and letting it fall to the floor without a care. Your hands travel south as his lips trail along your jaw and neck, sucking and biting your supple skin wherever he feels fit. He hisses into the dip where your collarbone meets your shoulder when you palm him through his pants.
“Fuck, babe, you want me bad, don’t you?” He mutters into the column of your throat, teeth sinking into the flesh after.
“Mhmm,” you whine, craning your neck to give him more access to the surface. It’s like a switch has flipped in him and it turns you on unbearably. This is what you’ve been trying to coax out of him all night.
Haknyeon pries apart your legs, slotting himself between them so he can sneak his fingers beneath your skirt. His thumb rubs tight circles into your clothed clit, the lace of your underwear damp with your arousal. He connects your lips again, groaning into your kiss when he moves the fabric aside and slides his knuckle through your folds. You buck up your hips, whimpering when he holds them down with his forearm.
“Want more,” you gasp when he applies a bit of pressure to your sensitive bundle of nerves.
“‘More’ what? Use your words, princess,” he instructs, tracing your entrance with his ring finger.
You shake your head because you’re not even sure what it is that you want. You just know that this isn’t enough to quell the hunger burning at your chest. It’s not nearly sufficient to fan the flames in the depths of your heart or the ache in the pit of your abdomen. You need him everywhere. It’s beyond him being your cute Bio lab partner now.
He urges you onto your elbows, pecking the plane of your stomach. He pushes up your skirt and discards your panties, baring you to the cool air of your apartment. Your eyes flutter shut when he kisses your clit gently. Your head is light and airy and it’s like you’re on cloud nine. Haknyeon hums against you, pulling off to scold you.
“Eyes open, baby,” he nudges his nose on your pelvic bone. “Want you to watch me eat you out.”
The moan you release is strained, like it had been confined in the back of your throat for ages until this moment. He flattens his tongue and licks a line from your hole to your clit, suckling the engorged skin and repeating. Your eyelids are heavy, keeping your intense gaze on him as he all but makes out with your pussy. He focuses his mouth on your clit and slips his middle finger into you. He pumps it in and out languidly, setting a rhythm that matches each swirl of his tongue around your clit.
The whole scene still feels unreal to both of you, like you might wake up from a wet dream or something. How was it possible that Ju Haknyeon was finger fucking you on your kitchen counter? Just a couple days ago, you were sitting side by side in your Biology lab, too nervous to initiate a substantial conversation. You’d think it would be harder to slob on someone’s knob than it would be to talk to them while wearing a fuckass lab coat and goggles.
Haknyeon works his forearm up, pinning down your thighs so your cunt is fully accessible. He adds a second finger to the mix, thrusting them at a higher speed and increasing the unrelenting sucking of your bundle of nerves. He can tell you’re creeping closer towards your climax with the way your walls clench around him and your hips continue to jerk up. And considering the kind of person he was, you figured he would aid you rather than hinder you. But you figured wrong.
He slows his assault, removing his mouth from your clit and leaving the stimulation at just his two fingers. You whine, lip quivering when he looks up into your eyes.
“W-Why are you— what are you doing?” You plead, hating the tone of your voice. The tables have turned, with you sitting beside desperation. This is so unlike you— so unlike the usual domineering aura you exude during sex— your body reacting differently to the power falling through the cracks within your grasp.
“Don’t you wanna savor the moment, princess?” He sounds so cocky, a far cry from the wavering confidence you’d always seen out of him. He kisses the skin of your inner thighs, moving closer and closer to the area you need him most, all the while he continues curling and uncurling his fingers.
The precipice of your orgasm is right there, you can almost taste it on the tip of your tongue. But Haknyeon holds it just out of reach, dangling it in your face like teasing a dog with a chew toy. Tears prick at the corner of your eyes, a false sense of hedonism building and building, then slowly ebbing away each time he retracts. You open your mouth, but no sound comes out.
Just when you’ve given up hope, he adds a third finger and wraps his lips around your clit, sucking harshly. The sudden and unexpected intrusion snaps that familiar cord in half, blinding you with white hot pleasure. The groan that escapes from the base of your chest is guttural, echoing throughout the kitchen. You don’t have it in you to worry about waking your neighbors, especially not when you feel the curve of a smile against your cunt, such an uncharacteristic response from Haknyeon.
Your legs spasm as the height of your orgasm calms. You pull him down for a wanton kiss, tangling your fingers in his hair. He laughs at the role swap, hands flat on the counter to hold him over you. “Feel good?”
“So good, Hak,” you murmur into his lips. “Think you can fuck me like that next?”
“So impatient,” he snickers, pecking along your jaw once more. “But since you’ve been so good for me, I think it’s only fair that I return the favor.”
You clumsily undo the button and zipper of his cargoes, pushing them down with your foot. He steps out of them and kicks them away while simultaneously removing his t-shirt. You take your top off and shimmy out of your skirt, raising an eyebrow at the narrowed look in his eyes. “What?”
“Do you have a condom?”
“No,” you poke your cheek with your tongue. “But, I don’t care if you wear one. I’d rather feel you raw, anyway.”
His forehead drops to your shoulder. “God, you’re killing me. Okay.”
He shoves down his briefs and you have to stop yourself from gawking at his size. While he wasn’t the biggest, he was definitely bigger than anyone else you’ve ever been with. He pumps himself a couple times, guiding his length to your entrance and throwing his head back when the tip presses into you. This was really happening, holy shit. Ju Haknyeon was actually having sex with you.
Your toes curl and you stab your nails into your palms to distract from the stinging stretch. He eases into you with the occasional grunt, minding your expressions for any signs of discomfort. When all he sees is your features contorted to display pleasure, he resumes. By the time he’s bottomed out completely, both of you are moaning messes. You feel so full, stuffed to the brim with the weight of his cock.
“I’ve wanted to be inside of you for so fucking long,” he admits, speaking the words into your sticky skin as he drags himself out only to piston back in. The action throttles you a bit, your eyes tempted to roll to the back of your head from how fucking good it feels. You can’t conjure coherent thoughts to properly convey how many endorphins are coursing through your veins.
Haknyeon sets a pace that combines the perfect amount of speed and depth, the tip of his cock brushing that spot deep in your cunt. Your brain is hazy and your vision blurs, hardly able to see anything in front of you. His mouth attaches to the pulse point on your neck, ensuring he bruises the area.
“Y-You’re— fuck— you’re s-so deep, Hak. I can feel you all over,” you wail, bringing one of his hands to tamp your lower stomach. The pressure contributes to the growing tension of your second orgasm, something you know will collide into you with even more exertion than the first.
“Yeah? You’re taking me s-so well, baby. No one else has ever fucked you this good, right?” Sweat beads on his hairline, dripping down his temples with every thrust of his hips and every drive of his cock into your sweet pussy. Even if he really did somehow manage to die tonight, he could do it with integrity. He could go out with the honor of a fallen soldier knowing that he got to experience this at least once in his life.
He hikes one of your knees up to your chest, burying his dick deeper if humanly possible. You arch your back, pushing into his chest to minimize the space between you, antsy at the promise of another release as mind blowing as the last. He brings you to the edge of the counter so you’re now hip to hip. Haknyeon snakes a hand in the middle of your bodies, using his thumb to rub circles into your clit. That stimulation coupled with the depth of his cock encourages the fluttering of your walls, in turn drawing out the state of bliss you’ve been chasing.
Your vision goes blank, stars painting the behinds of your eyelids. A second orgasm crests upon you and evokes a moan so pornographic, it sounds far away from you. It’s a dreamlike euphoria, an almost out of body experience that puts every other orgasm to shame. The surface of your skin is hot to the touch.
“Where do you want me, princess?” Haknyeon asks breathily. In the calamity of your own release, you nearly forgot about his until you register the twitching inside of you. It pauses the static in your ears, returning the volume of the world to its normality.
“Cum inside of me,” you whine, the overstimulation becoming too much to handle. He doesn’t need to be told another time, grip tightening on your thigh as he spills into your cunt.
The two of you stay still for a moment, allowing clarity to flow into your brains. You wince when he finally has half the mind to pull out, his nose scrunching up at the sensitivity. He slides his underwear back on, extremely conscious of how naked he is right now. He has an inkling that you were anticipating that this would happen, because why else would you ask him to stay over tonight? But, he is the Ju Haknyeon that you’ve sat next to this entire semester in your Biology lab. So he couldn’t just march forward without a little overthinking and self deprecation.
“Do you still want me to stay?” His voice has reverted back to that small, unsure tone. You sit up quickly, alarmed by the twinge of disappointment underneath it.
“Of course, I do,” you pout, kissing his cheek and lacing your fingers together. “I’ve had a crush on you since the beginning of the year, Hak. Sure, maybe I skipped a couple steps in between, but I have wanted this so badly— I have wanted you so badly— for you don’t even know how long.”
He chuckles, tucking some hair behind your ear. He leaves a sweet kiss on your lips, softer and gentler than the ones from earlier that night. He’s intentional with the way he glides them in harmony, like he was following the melody of the most beautiful song. “Oh trust me, I think I have an idea.”
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© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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You Should Find Another Guiding Light - Rafe Cameron x Reader
Dear Reader Duology: Part 1, Part 2
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Summary: With you drunk at Kelce’s party, Rafe has to drive you, his ex, home. Neither of you are over each other and both of you know it, for better or for worse. That doesn’t make things easy. Not at all. Word Count: 3.7k+ TWs/CWs: She/her pronouns used, adult/profane language, descriptions of a party, descriptions of drunkenness, a guy being a weirdo, Rafe being a little bit crazy, angst with the potential for a happy ending, I guess. Note: The title is in fact a Taylor Swift lyric lol. I don’t know, I just wanted to dip my toes in the OBX writing arena and I just had this idea pop into my head and not leave me alone so here it is. I think I might end up doing a part 2 for this just because I don’t want this to be Sad, but we shall see.
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Rafe heard the chant of, “Go, go, go, go,” from the other side of the house.
The chant didn’t interest him even remotely. Pretty much nothing about the party did, actually. And if it weren’t at Kelce’s house while his parents were out of town, he wouldn’t have even bothered to come. The high he’d been riding had faded nearly an hour ago, and the drink in his hand was not nearly strong enough. He wasn’t even buzzed anymore, this was boring. All these fucking parties were boring now. Had been since…well, long enough now.
“Rafe,” he heard to his left, while about to bring the cup to his lips. He cut his eyes to the side. It was Topper, a grim look on his face, lips turned firmly downward. Rafe raised an eyebrow, lowering the cup. “Get the fuck out here, I need your help.”
“What?” he asked, huffing as he put down his cup on the nearest surface. Before Topper could answer, though, Rafe noted the ongoing chants from outside. A chant that was exclusively a mixture of his ex’s name—your name, the reason that nothing was enjoyable anymore—and cheers. “Oh fucking hell no.”
“Yeah, exactly,” Topper said dryly. “Me and Kelce just had to stop her from doing a keg stand in a skirt.”
“I swear to God,” Rafe growled. 
Rafe shouldered past him quickly making his way outside. You were dancing. He didn’t inherently have a problem with that. He loved watching you dance, in fact. Especially when you were drunk. But, that wasn’t even half the issue. He was torn between a mixture of fury and concern when he saw you, standing on top of the outdoor bar with some random guy holding your legs and trying to look up your skirt. The skirt that Rafe knew personally you almost never wore anything under. He couldn’t even imagine how drunk you were right now to not be flicking that guy’s hands off of you.
“Don’t do anything stupid,” Topper advised.
“Shut the fuck up, Top,” Rafe retorted harshly.
He strode forward, landing his hand aggressively on the guy’s shoulder and squeezing it until the man winced and tried to pull away. Then, Rafe only squeezed tighter. The guy shouted in protest to the rough grip, but Rafe didn’t care. The tool still had the nerve to have his fucking hand on your leg. You hadn’t even noticed that Rafe was standing there yet, which was another mark to just how out of it Rafe knew you had to be.
“What the fuck, Cameron?” the guy demanded.
“I’m sorry, who are you?” Rafe spat. “And what the fuck do you think that you’re doing?”
The guy, obviously far too stupid for his own good, smirked at Rafe. Actually fucking smirked. Rafe felt his blood pressure rising. Rafe saw, somewhere in his periphery that Topper and Kelce were both coming his way. He didn’t particularly care. He could easily handle this loser himself.
“You two aren’t even together anymore,” the guy said smugly. “So, last I checked she’s a free agent, isn’t she?”
“Oh Jesus fucking Christ,” Kelce muttered behind him.
Rafe paid no mind to it, hand moving from the guy’s shoulder to his throat. Rafe smiled at the shock in the guy’s eyes, an angry glint in his eyes. He ignored the other’s weak attempts at dislodging him and instead took a step closer, glaring down at the little fucker.
“Take your hand off her or you won’t have a hand,” he said flatly. Idiot that he was, literally being choked and surrounded by Rafe’s friends, the guy still didn’t move his hand. Rafe let out a harsh laugh, tilting his head to the side slightly, looking more pissed by the second. “We can jump from you losing the hand to me killing you. Your fucking choice.” Starting to go purple in his face, Rafe laughed at the guy again, not loosening his hold. He reached over with his other hand, peeling his grip off of your leg, squeezing hard enough that Rafe was shocked the bones weren’t cracking. “Wasn’t so fucking hard to listen, was it?”
“Rafe,” Topper said sharply.
Rafe glanced back at him and then rolled his eyes. He let go of the guy and threw him away, hard, towards the ground. A good friend as always, Kelce caught the guy, then he and Topper started walking the jackass out to make sure he actually left the party. Yeah, Rafe was going to have to make sure that he never saw that guy again. Or, if he did, that it wasn’t in public like this. Rafe turned his attention back to you and was startled to see you looking down at him already.
“Rafe?” you asked, cocking your head to the side, looking, quite frankly, like a confused puppy.
Clenching his jaw, Rafe reached up, patting the bare skin of your leg, forcing himself to keep it brief and not let his hands linger on the bare skin. “Come on, Princess,” he said firmly.
Your brow furrowed. “Fuck you! I’m having fun,” you slurred.
At that, Rafe let himself roll his eyes. “Yeah. I’m not letting you dance on the bar and do a fucking striptease. You’ll hate yourself tomorrow,” he said sharply. You glared down at him, but Rafe didn’t care, knowing that he was absolutely right. “Get the fuck down.” You didn’t listen, unsurprisingly—you never had—so he physically grabbed you, carefully maneuvering your body off the bar without exposing you to the whole party.
“Rafe,” you whined, “stop it. I don’t want to go with you!”
“Liar,” he said, scoffing before he could stop himself. When you were level with his face, he grabbed your chin and made you look at him. “Stop fucking fighting me before you flash somebody.”
You glared at him. “Who cares if I do?” you asked.
Once again, Rafe rolled his eyes. “I’ll take their fucking eyes out. But, let’s not do this, Princess. I’ve had enough shit today without this added on,” he said through grit teeth, losing the limited patience he’d started with. He helped you off the bar—manhandled you, really—until you were standing on your feet, using his body for support to stay upright. 
“You have no right,” you said, sniffing.
“How much have you even had to drink?” Rafe asked, amusement overcoming his irritation for a second.
“Oh fuck you,” you repeated, pushing weakly at his chest, even though your hand tangled in the bottom of his shirt like it always did when you were utterly sloshed. “I haven’t even had that much!” You then took on a distinctly dizzy look, swaying and Rafe cursed, catching your waist to steady you. “See? I’m fine!”
“Yeah, you’re so fine,” he agreed sarcastically. 
Without waiting for you to say anything else, Rafe started guiding you toward the exit. He nodded at Kelce and Topper as they passed. He ignored the looks on his friends’ faces as best he could. He didn’t need to think about the shit he’d get from them about this in the morning. No, instead, he focused on forcing you into the passenger seat of his truck and making you get buckled up. Only after Rafe got into the car and started it did you seem to register that you weren’t at the party anymore.
“Hey! Where the hell are you taking me? I’m not going home with you!” you slurred, clearly in an argumentative mood.
“No. You’re not. I’m taking you home. To your house,” he replied, patience coming back at least a little bit now that they weren’t in the stupid party crowd.
“Rafael Cameron you fucking suck,” you accused glaring at him.
“Why’s that?” Rafe asked, backing up and then putting the car in drive and practically peeling out of Kelce’s driveway.
You scoff at his question. It would be adorable if it weren’t at his expense, Rafe was sure. “First you fucking break up with me out of nowhere! And give me no explanation at all! And you take half our fucking friends in the end! And then you kill the goddamn vibe the second I try to have fun at a party,” you declare sounding genuinely pissed.
“That’s not—” Rafe began, stopping himself with a sigh when you cut him off.
“No! Shut up!” you demanded, hitting his arm, once, twice, a third time, until Rafe sharply pulled over and turned to glare at you. He was angry now, except his anger was short-lived. The moment he met your eyes and saw that yours were full of tears, he deflated. Your bottom lip trembled and Rafe had to actively count his breaths to keep from not reacting to it. “Why are you ruining parties now? Was my life not enough for you? You have to take the rest of the good things left too?”
Rafe inhaled shakily. He pinched his nose and tapped his fingers against the wheel and then looked back towards you. “You know you didn’t want someone else touching you,” he said calmly. “You hate when people think they can touch you at parties. You always have.” He took a breath. “I don’t want to see anything happen to you. Especially when you’re too drunk to think clearly.” You went to retort but Rafe shook his head. “No. Stop. Just listen to me.” You rolled your eyes and looked away. Rafe caught your chin and turned your face so you were looking at him again. “I’m not going to watch some losers take advantage of you. Ever. You think that’d stop?”
“Why do you even care?” you spat, displaying sadness more than the anger he knew you were going for.
“Don’t ask me that,” Rafe warned, shaking his head. “Don’t act like you don’t know already. The dumb act has never worked for you.”
You scoffed. “Oh? So you’re a coward now too on top of everything else? Cool,” you said. “Can’t even talk to me, huh?”
Rafe let go of your face and turned away from you, pulling back on the road and driving faster now towards your house. “You know damn well why I care,” he said through grit teeth.
“Do I?” you challenged.
“Princess,” he said sharply, “don’t do this right now.” He took a deep breath even though he didn’t want to. “You’re drunk.”
“And?” you demanded. “That makes me an idiot?”
“Don’t put words in my mouth,” he said, groaning in irritation. You swatted at his chest again. And truly, if this were anyone else, he’d have kicked them out of the car. But it was you. “Come on, Princess.” He tapped the steering wheel to manage the anxiety brewing in his chest at the thought. “We can have a conversation about it when you’re sober if you want. But I’m not doing this with you drunk. Fuck that.”
“Fuck you,” you reiterated as if you hadn’t already said it to him a thousand times that night.
Even with that declaration, you were blessedly quiet the rest of the ride. You fiddled with the heat on your side of the truck, getting comfortable, and just stared out of the window. And for the rest of the ride, Rafe could almost pretend that things were normal. The way that they should’ve been. Except that you were leaning on the door and not him. And that both of his hands were on the wheel, instead of one resting on your leg. And your stony silence, even when your favorite songs came on the shared playlist neither of you had gotten around to deleting yet. The silence in the car in general, really.
At your house, Rafe had to nearly throw himself from the car to get to your side before you opened the door and tumbled out. Even doing that, you nearly fell from the truck in an uncoordinated heap, stubbornly not wanting his assistance. He huffed and righted your feet on the ground, holding your waist and looking you over. You leaned into the touch for a second before seemingly realizing it, then you pulled wildly away, nearly falling again until he caught you.
“You can be angry after I get you to your room,” he said firmly.
“Fine,” you muttered, frowning.
Rafe went to move but you wouldn’t move. He tried to force you to move, but you resisted every logical piece of your mind, and every attempt he made. You were firmly stuck to your spot as if trying to grow roots like a tree. So, he picked you up again, carrying you to the door. Graciously, your parents weren’t in town and the house was empty, so no one had to see this disaster unfold. 
He took your key and unlocked the door easily, locking it behind them for the time being. He didn’t really feel like risking someone coming in when he was corralling a drunk you and he couldn’t pay full attention to everything else. Then, he carried you upstairs like it was nothing to him. He dropped you gently on your bed and avoided looking at you as he grabbed a pair of clothes for you to change into. He went into your bathroom and got makeup remover, knowing that you’d be pissed if you woke up with a trace of makeup still on your face still. 
As he walked back into the room, Rafe regretted leaving almost immediately. Your eyes were swimming with tears and a few were spilling down your cheeks. You looked away from him, trying to avoid his gaze, but he wasn’t an idiot. He’d noticed. You tried to scrub them away and he sighed almost silently. Rafe put the stuff down on the bed next to you and then knelt down in front of you. He grabbed your hands but didn’t say anything and waited.
“I hate you,” you said weakly, bottom lip wavering.
“I know,” he said, nodding. He cracked a fake grin. “I do too.”
“Fuck you,” you said, shaking your head. You sniffled and Rafe immediately knew that he wasn’t leaving for a while still. He stroked the back of your hands and waited once more. You always cracked. It didn’t take long, only a few breaths. “I love you. I…I fucking hate you.” You leaned heavily toward him and he wrapped his arms around you without hesitation. “I love you. I wish I didn’t.”
“I know,” he repeated. He pressed a kiss to the side of your head. He let out a slow breath, deciding that fuck it, it didn’t matter anyway anymore, not if he didn’t think you’d remember this in the morning. “I love you too, Gorgeous. You know that.”
You let out a watery laugh. “No I don’t,” you denied. He frowned at the words. “You left me. I…I hate that you left me. I didn’t do anything!”
Rafe sighed. “We talked about this,” he said quietly.
“Fuck you. You decided. We didn’t talk about anything!” you reminded him.
And that was true. He grabbed your chin again, forcing your eyes to meet yet again. This time though, he leaned your foreheads together. Your bottom lip trembled, but you happily stayed close to him. He took it as the tiny, tiny, minuscule win that was. He moved his hand from your chin to your cheek, thumb tracing a pattern up and down, soothing and slow.
“I need to make sure you’re safe,” he reminded you.
“You’re stupid,” you said, pulling away from him. “Just because we’re not together doesn’t mean I’m safe. Everyone knows that we were together. Everyone knows that to get to you they’d just have to use me. So I’m not suddenly more safe.”
“Safe from me,” Rafe gruffly corrected. When you open your mouth to retort, eyes alight with anger, he places his hand over your mouth. “Like I said, Gorgeous. We can talk about this later. When you’re not drunk. If you even want to still.”
“Oh? You’ll stop ignoring me then?” you asked from behind his hand. “Act like the adults that we are?”
Rafe rolled his eyes. “I haven’t been ignoring you. I’ve been giving you space,” he said. He let out a rough sigh, then shook his head, reminding himself that this would have to wait. “I promise we will talk about it if you want to. “Now can I please just help you change and get this stupid fucking makeup off you?”
Miracle of miracles, you didn’t try to fight him on it. So, he helped you change, ignoring the wandering hands and clumsy advances from you with ease. And then he forced you to get all the makeup off and brush your teeth. Then, he made you drink a bottle of water and settle in bed. You were pouting at him, tears still falling from your eyes—he didn’t know if they’d stopped since they started—that he brushed away lazily. Rafe sighed and sat next to you, stroking your cheek. Your hand landed on his knee, the touch almost hard as though you needed to squeeze his leg to remember he really was there. It broke his fucking heart.
“Come on, you gotta stop. We just got more water in you,” he said softly. “You know I can’t leave you when you’re upset like this. Not when you’re alone here.” He nearly winced at his phrasing when you seemed to cry harder for a moment. “Come on, Princess. You gotta stop crying.”
“Then I guess you can’t leave,” you replied shakily.
Rafe bit his lip, looking down at you. Knowing that he was already fucked anyways, he moved, pulling you practically into his lap. He held you tightly, glad that you didn’t even make an attempt at brushing the affection off. No, you leaned into the touch like you’d been starved of love your whole life. You laid your head right over his heart, eyes closed. He felt the way that your hands tapped the rhythm of his heartbeat into his arm. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
“I don’t want you to doubt that I love you. I don’t want you to doubt that…that our relationship is…was real,” Rafe said. “I do love you. It’s just…hard, Gorgeous.”
You turned your head up to meet his eyes. He watched a flurry of intense emotions—every single one he’d ever experienced…more, maybe—flash through your eyes in a matter of seconds. You reached up and stroked his cheekbone…his nose…his lips. Then, you dropped your hand to lay on his chest, right next to where your head was.
“We’ll talk about it,” you declared. “I want to. We have to.”
“Okay, Princess,” he agreed softly. He knew that there was a chance sober you wouldn’t actually want to talk to him. He could ignore that in the meantime. He could live in this moment. In the false hope of a promised future where you did want to talk to him. “We’ll talk.”
You leaned up and pressed an incredibly short fleeting kiss to his lips before burying your face in his chest. He closed his eyes and held you tighter, wishing that things were…different.  “Can you just…stay until I fall asleep?” you asked quietly. “I know you won’t stay all night, but…please?”
Rafe’s heart, again, broke for you. And he hated himself for hurting you the way that he was. “Yeah,” he said, voice hoarse. He stroked your arms, soothing. “I’ll stay until you fall asleep, Princess.” He knew it wouldn’t be long anyhow. Your eyes were already heavy, staying shut longer than they were staying open.
“I miss you, Rafe,” you admit quietly.
“I miss you too,” he said, equally quiet.
You paused. “I love you,” you said.
Rafe inhaled shakily. “I love you too. So much,” he said, voice sounding choked and short.
“Do you promise?” you whispered.
He paused. He had no doubt you heard his heart stutter in his chest. “I promise.”
Your eyes started to drift closed longer and longer while Rafe rubbed a soothing pattern up and down your back until he was sure you were asleep. You were incredibly beautiful in this peaceful sleep, with even breathing and a smile on your face. It was the happiest he’d seen you look in a while. He knew it was his fault. Again, he hated himself for it. It made him sure that he did the right thing even if it killed you both right now.
He had to leave.
He let out a sigh and pressed another kiss to your forehead, then another. He took the time to inhale your scent, memorize the way that you felt in his arms…to be with you again. Then, carefully, he got out of your grasp and stood. Rafe then settled you comfortably on your bed and tucked you in. He pressed a final kiss to your forehead then stood and walked to your bedroom door.
He had to leave. He didn’t want to.
For a beat, Rafe paused in the doorframe. He looked down at your sleeping frame. He longed to just lay down with you and forget the trials of the past two months without you. The hell he went through without you. He shook his head though. You deserved better. He was sure of it. He was almost certain that sober you would agree. Still, as he walked quietly down the hall, locking the door again behind himself, and slipping out back to his truck, he found himself hoping. Hoping that you would call him. Hoping that you would still want to talk.
He had to leave. He didn’t want to. He loved you.
In the quiet of his car, he took the time to look at his phone. Just after two thirty in the morning now. Your smiling face, still his wallpaper, looked back at him. He stared at the image of you, smiling at him like he was the sun, and felt his heart squeeze so tightly it took his breath away. 
He had to leave. He didn’t want to. He loved you. You were everything, even now.
He started the car and started to drive back to his own place now. He tapped at the steering wheel again to avoid chewing at his nails like you hated—even now you kept him from bad habits he had, even if they were the little ones.
Rafe knew he wasn’t strong enough to stay away and he didn’t want to.
Even if it made him selfish, he hoped you called him—he hoped for a second chance.
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kissitbttr · 2 years
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eddie and mean!cheerleader girlfriend have their first fight part 3
read pt 2 and pt 1
a/n: hii i just hit 1k🥺💞 thank you for the love I appreciate u guys sm <3 also, it wasn't as long as i thought it was gn be because I snipped snapped some of them lol
-
the nervous feeling in his body hasn’t died down as eddie steps out of the van. his stomach churns at the sight of Jason’s party. it was never not packed and the last time he was here, he could barely breathe. the sight of people drinking, throwing up and making a fool of themselves causing him to scrunch his nose in disgust. the music is far worse.
but one thing he needs to remember is that he’s here for her. and for her only
just as he expected when he enters the party, all eyes are set on him. possibly millions of thoughts swimming inside of their minds, ‘the nerve on this weird ass dude to be in a Jason Carver’s party’. obviously they are far too drunk to actually beat his ass so they let the longing stares do the job.
“feelings mutual buddy” eddie smiles sarcastically to a guy who gives him a dirty look. rolling his eyes after as he walks away.
he hates high school students. but mostly the kids in hawkins high
his eyes wander to each and every corner of the room, fingers tapping against the rough material of his jeans. something he does when he gets nervous. why is it so hard to find her? could she probably locked herself in a room?
“where are you, baby?” he whispers to himself, head turning from left to right and that’s where he spots one of his closest friends. “robin? robin, hey!”
the short haired girl whips her head towards the voice, a big smile on her face as she waves. “eddie, hi! i didn’t think you would enjoy a place like this”
she’s holding a red solo cup, offering him one in which he turns down.
“i don’t. came here for y/n. have any idea where she is? she called to pick her up.”
“oh yeah-shit! last time i saw her she was in the kitchen with some guy. looked to me she was about to kill him.”
“some guy?!” his eyebrows are raised. “was it brandon?”
robin could only shrug. “maybe. brown hair in a quiff, he was pretty touchy with her. you should go to her.”
eddie clenches his jaw, “okay, yeah. thanks.”
he walks away before robin could respond, squeezing his way through a sea of people. holding back the disgust as he the reek of sweat filling up his nostrils. god, he swears he could throw up in any minute
eddie finally breathes in relief as he reaches the kitchen. internally glad that it isn’t as crowded.
it doesn’t take long to find her. she’s leaning against the wall right next to a fridge. his heart immediately turn into hearts when he realizes what she’s wearing tonight. soft cotton tank top with lace details embroidered under her breasts and a low cut denim skirt that’s short enough to let her thighs full on display.
she looks so beautiful.
then he moves back to see her face. he notices that her eyes look bored, shoulders slump with arms crossed. unamused at the fact that this man keeps talking. but he doesn’t miss the frightened look on her face.
from the back of his head, eddie could tell exactly who it is. her fucking ex. the ex who broke her heart and made her think that she wasn’t good enough. one that took her far too long to open up again.
“brandon, seriously i do not want to talk to you right now. leave me the fuck alone.” she jabs her fingers to his chest, not really in the mood
“oh come on baby! when are you gonna ditch the loser and come back? i said i was sorry!”
she shakes her head. “can’t hear you over that cock flavored breath washes over me. back. off”
“stop being fucking difficult, y/n” brandon starts getting angry, taking another step ready to whisk her away, “you know I don’t like difficult.”
did he just fucking threaten her?!
“she told you to back off.” eddie steps in, glaring at the jock and watches him slowly turn around. he misses the glee on y/n’s face when she hears his voice. happiness taking over when her boyfriend appears
brandon snickers, squaring his shoulders as if he’s gearing up for a fight. “the fuck you just say to me, freak?”
“i said. back. off” he responds in a cold tone, glaring up to him. “you deaf or something?” eddie tries his best not to swing a punch and ruin his face.
now eddie might be an inch or two shorter that brandon. but there’s no denying that he’s far more intimidating when he’s angry. balled fists with teeth clenched and eyes look like it could kill someone with a single hard stare.
“she’s just playing hard to get, man. she knows she wants me. it’s only matter of times before she dumps your weird ass and get back with me.”
y/n scoffs, pushing herself against the wall and walk over behind eddie as he puts his hand to cover her as an instinct . “don’t get your hopes up, you stupid fuck. Eddie is much more of a man than you are.”
upon hearing that, eddie clears his throat. hiding the blush prominent on his cheeks when she compliments him. “bab-y/n? mind waiting outside by my van for a minute?” he pleads after turning to look at her, holding back the urge to grab her hand.
she contemplates for a while. eyes keep switching between the two. worry grows inside her that eddie is gonna bruise him up. as much as she loves seeing brandon with a black eye, she can’t risk eddie getting beaten up by the rest of basketball team. she can’t handle seeing it. it would hurt too much.
“I’m not going to punch him.” he whispers in a reassuring tone with a small smile as if he read her mind. “just wanted to talk ‘s all. okay?” hands itching to reach out and touch her,
she stares at him with a bitten lip, nodding slowly. “be quick, please.” with that she walks away, not before giving one last glare to brandon.
“god, when did she become a soft bitch? she was never like that with me. you brainwashed her or someth-“
before he could finish his sentence, he’s startled by eddie’s sudden grip around the collar of his shirt and slamming him hard against the wall.
“you stay the fuck away from her” eddie seethes, knuckles turning white. “you don’t go near her, you don’t look at her, and if you even think about her… I’d beat the shit out of you myself.”
brandon looks extremely mortified. all those years he watches the long haired kid getting bullied and called names, never once he has seen eddie doing something about it. he never thought that eddie is capable of being violent.
eddie has always been the type to know how to control his emotions. something he learns from when he was a kid because he refuses to grow up like his old man. he doesn’t care about those basketball idiots making fun of him and his friends. It’s nothing.
but when it comes down to her, he personally wouldn’t let that slide.
“a-alright. sure man. whatever you say.” brandon chuckles nervously as he feels the grip around him starting to loosen.
eddie slowly lets go, not giving him another word before walking away from the scene. if it wasn’t for y/n, he probably already had his hand around that prick’s neck. giving him a piece of mind.
he doesn’t even want to begin to think what could happen if he hadn’t showed up in time. she was already both scared and exhausted having to tolerate his actions. he was a pushy motherfucker, never liked him from the beginning
“found her?” eddie suddenly finds robin rushes over to stand by his side when he’s about to walk out of the party. “she okay?”
“yeah. I’m taking her home. thanks robin, enjoy the party” he pats her shoulder, earning a grateful smile from her.
“thanks dude, oh and hey eds?” robin calls when he stops mid track between the steps on the front porch, turning back to look at her,
“don’t fuck it up again.” she says hinting at the fight the two just had weeks ago. “she misses you, you know? talks about you all the time.”
hearing that statement just makes his stomach flip. it sort of gives him hope. maybe there’s a part of her that actually wants to fix things as much as he does. as small as it can be
“not planning to.” he shoots her a smile before continuing to walk down the steps and back to his van. immediately seeing y/n hugging herself due to the wispy cold air, her lips are shivering and eyes looking away.
eddie shrugs of his leather jacket, without thinking twice. “here. put this on, okay?”
she looks up and smile softly.“thank you” taking it in her hands before putting around her body, inhaling that familiar scent of him she misses so much.
“shall we?”
+
the drive is pretty quiet, neither of them actually wanted to start something. y/n has her head against the window, mouth shut with her legs crossed and eddie is dying to hear her say something. just anything really.
the silence is driving him nuts.
“I’ll drive you home, okay?” he asks, only to receive no response. her gaze is fixed on the window, staring out into the open.
“you’ve eaten anything? had some snacks maybe?” he’s making a small talk in hopes that she’ll respond. or even just throw a glance to his way. he badly wants her to do that. just one.
he missed being around her. seven days without her presence feels like eternity, the way it’s making him feel should be forbidden. hands clenching every now and then because he’s aching to touch his girlfriend.
if he still had the right to call her that
eddie tilts his head to look back at her. and just as he thought . no answer. he figures there’s nothing he can do to get her to talk to him so he stays quiet.
he doesn’t blame her for not wanting to talk to him. she probably called him because he’s the only one she knows who has a ride and would take her home. he shouldn’t be having high hopes anyway.
after all, all of this happened because of him.
“actually” she starts. “i don’t wanna go home tonight, can i come over to yours? if it’s okay”
there’s a sense of happiness bloom in his chest when he hears her speak. eddie tries to brush off the smile dipping into his mouth after hearing it. the excitement then begins to bubble inside of him, butterflies as you may call it. he feels like a five year old kid hearing his mom say yes to ice cream for breakfast.
clearing his throat before speaking, he musters up a normal tone. “yeah sure. no worries. you could never be a bother to me.”
inside. he’s dying.
‘stay cool, stay cool. my girl is here with me. she’s coming over. don’t crash the van’ he thinks
“okay.” she responds shortly, head resting against the window. “i didn’t eat by the way. couldn’t. the party smells like hot acrid barf so i had no appetite.”
he snorts out a laugh. she’s so funny without even trying. “we can have some at my place. not just pop tarts. i did some groceries awhile ago with Wayne so we can make a sandwich or something.”
with an raised eyebrow, she asks “you finally went to the supermarket? tell me, was it scary?”
“okay now don’t make fun of me. the old people who go there are so… i don’t know, weird! you know that!” he replies seriously,
she giggles, tucking her messy hair behind the ear. “i don’t actually but you can think whatever you want.”
he admires the way her lips curve into a smile. and how her hair gets messy but still manage to compliment every detail of her features. even with mascara dotting the crinkles by her eyes,
twenty minutes after they arrive at the trailer park, the couple walk into his home. this is not the first time she’s been here, she stayed over a few times because his place is somehow far more comforting than hers. not that she hates hers, it just feels more … home?
his bed would probably her favorite part. nothing is better than laying down with her boyfriend, having small talks about what ever after going through the amount of sex they had when his uncle is not home. he would also spend an hour or two teaching her how to roll a blunt.
“i could make you a sandwich if you want?” eddie speaks up, locking the door behind as she sits on the dining table. “or that ramen cup that you like so much. i don’t have it but i could go to the market right now and get you one-“
“eddie” she stops him, a warm smile on her face. “a sandwich sounds good.”
he nods, before heading to the kitchen to pull out the ingredients. he’s no chef but he makes a mean grilled cheese and ham sandwich. it’s the only meal she would eat from him, other than that, that man is clueless when it comes to cooking.
“no ketchup?”
“no ketchup” she repeats, eyeing his back with a lopsided smile. “you’ve been working out?”
he cocks an eyebrow, “what makes you think that?”
“your back seems… toned. and i noticed your arms got bigger too.”
god, why does she have to do this?
“really?” he tries act like the words don’t faze him. “have you noticed the pudgy stomach too? seems like i gain some there.” with that he laughs a little
she frowns. he could probably joking but she doesn’t miss the sound of insecurity seeping in his tone. she hates it when he does that. he doesn’t have to tell her but she just knows it.
“okay, no. stop that. you look fine. a little roll doesn’t hurt anybody.” she shrugs, leaning back against the chair.
“you sure you’re not just saying that?” he asks in a playful manner, walking back to her as he puts the plate down in front of her. “there.”
“if i only wanted you for your body, i would fuck you and sucked your cock before leaving. you know, you’re much more than that.”
he flushes, crossing his arms before taking a seat next to her. “always the foul mouth on you.”
“better than being a fake.” she replies, biting on the sandwich. “wait. that one’s not true, I’m definitely contradicting myself. people still say I’m a fake ass bitch.”
he laughs. not because it’s a fact but how brutally honest she is about herself, though he reminds her from time to time that her entire personality isn’t just all that. there’s much more he can see through her and whether she chooses to believe it or not. he does. he just wishes people could see what he sees
because seeing her happily munching on the sandwich with messy hair and how her pupils glow at the cheesy goodness is like finally finding his happy place. when you look at this girl at this exact moment, you wouldn’t think she’s capable on hurting anyone.
which brings him to that one exact problem. one where he called her all the nasty things he knew she didn’t expect him to say. to this day, he regretted every single thing he spewed out of his mouth. there’s nothing he wants more than to tell her he’s sorry, that the hurt he has caused has been on his mind on daily basis.
“I’m sorry y/n.” he blurts before he can say anything,
she stops chewing to look at him, “what for?”
he takes a deep breath, trying to remember all of the things he wants to say to her. everything has to be perfect “shit, i had this rehearsed in my head but i keep forgetting. s-sorry.”
‘fuck you, stop being cute’ she thinks
“take your time i guess” she still needs to be a little mean. because there’s no way she’s letting him off the hook that easy.
she can’t erased what he did to her. it still hurts
he leans forward, hands clasps with his eyes shut. trying not to tear up infront of your person is difficult when you’re the one who fucked up. and he has no right to actually feel that way.
“what i said to you… was out of line, it was unforgivable. you’re not insecure. you’re…. perfect” he exhales, trying to catch her eyes but she keeps looking away from him. “and when i mentioned your exes? it was not okay too. what kind of a boyfriend does that.”
“i agree you were being a fucking dick.”
nodding, he smiles sadly. “i second that. but it’s not true, all of it.”
“then why did you say it?” she questions,
“i-i was in a heat of the moment i guess” he gulps, “it was never meant to go that far.”
“oh yeah? how far were you willing for that one to go? did you calculate the fight or something?” she’s starting to feel upset, looking at him with a confused look. “you know, no matter how angry i am at you… i would never pull that type of shit that you did. it was traumatizing to hear. you know that?”
her voice cracks at the end, and it makes him feel more shitty than he already is. the way her eyes beginning to water and how her lips tremble just shows how vulnerable he makes her feel. it’s a sight he never wanted to see
“n-no! y/n i-fuck, i know i could never take back all of those things i said to you but i said it anyway. it was fucking s-stupid. i took my girl’s biggest insecurity then used it against you and it was not fair for me to do that. to anyone for that matter. believe me when i say that, please baby you have to. i have been drowning myself in regret for the past couple of weeks and-“ he draws a deep breath to keep him from falling apart,
“i don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself.”
no matter how mean or bitchy y/n is, she always has a soft spot in her heart for the ones she loves the most. and as angry and disappointed she is at him, seeing him break down just takes a huge chunk out of her heart.
she knows that he didn’t mean it, it’s eddie we’re talking about here.
this man may look like a menace but he refuses to even kill a fly.
and she doesn’t want him to keep blaming himself to the point that he believes he’s nothing but a fuck up. he’s better than all those shitty guys she has dated, and she confirmed that to him before. because it’s the truth
“i know” her tone is soft and calming. she taps her finger underneath his chin so he’ll be able to look at her. heart soften at the sight of her boyfriend’s glossy eyes and how the fear in his eyes is easy to be found when the thought of losing her completely tears him apart.
“look, eddie” she begins with a sigh. shifting her weight to face him. “the day you came into my life … you built this home inside of me. a small comfortable bed in my heart with thick white duvet and boxes of pizzas, refusing to leave… and i am so happy that you didn’t despite knowing the choice that you can. sure you tend to keep it messy at times but you never forget to put it back together.”
he listens. every word. and he fails to notice how his heart warms at her choice of words. it almost sounds like he had received a love letter from his significant other.
her eyes then cast down, gazing at the small heart tattooed on his ring finger. “I’ve thought so much before letting you in because i know love hurts. people are capable to give you unbearable amount of pain once they find the things that you care about the most. they would eventually figure out how to use those things against you… the process of putting yourself back into one piece is exhausting which i hate having to go through that again and-“
“and i just did it..” eddie interrupts. realizing the disaster he put her heart through. gulping as the memory of calling her ‘insecure’ comes flashing back into his mind. “god… i fucking-i hurt you so bad and i never thought i would be the person to do that to you… I’m a fucking dick”
“what? hey no. stop” she tells him. forcing him to look at her by reaching out to palm his cheeks. “you’re not a dick… i mean you were at the field that day but entirely? no. baby, you’ve changed my life.”
eddie searches for the security and reassurance in her eyes. then he studies every single detail of her features, the way her lips curve into a small grin trying to comfort him. trying to make him believe
“and i believe you have no power in hurting anyone. especially to the ones you love the most-“
“i love you” he blurts, “i love you the most. no one else”
“yes. i know” she nods, brushing few bangs away from his forehead. “you show me every day. and i am so grateful.”
how could even the universe let him have the most precious girl like her? why do they trust him enough to take care of her when he knows for a fact that there are people who could provide her with better love and experience?
she could’ve chosen one of their beating hearts but instead she chose his.
“i should’ve been the one trying to comfort you, not the other way around” he laughs through his tears making her laugh as well.
“you already have.” she responds truthfully, thumbing the thin skin underneath his eye. “i love you. okay?”
“i love you back” he replies, eyes dropping to her soft lips and he’s eager to kiss her but he doesn’t want to overstep the boundaries. “and i am sorry. for everything.”
“you said that, my love” she giggles, kissing his nose. “i forgive you but i swear you pull that shit one more time, I’ll leave your ass and I’ll make sure you don’t get any clients anymore. got that?”
he nods his head fast after hearing how quick she is to switch her tone. yup, he’s still scared of her
“promise, gorgeous.”
“good” she lets go of his face and he struggles not to tug her hands back and keep it there.
“oh and uhm…. can i take a shower?” she looks at him, fiddling with the loose string of her top. “i smell like someone poured chardonnay on a woman who’s been dead for six months”
he emits a chuckle with his head shaking. even at this state, she still manages to pull a joke or two,
“you don’t need to ask” he tells her with a beam and stands up. heading towards his room with her trailing from behind. grabbing his ‘motley crue’ tee from the drawer. one that she loves to steal. “I keep this here, yeah? towels on the rack.”
“uncle wayne… when will he be home?” she asks
“around 2 i guess. he’s off to meet up with some of his friends after work so I’ll be alone for a while.” he informs with his arms crossed,
she hums, walking towards the bathroom while taking off his jacket then her top and throwing it on the floor—on purpose— giving him a show.
eddie eyes her bare back for a quick second. it is not easy having to resist the urge from planting kisses on her soft skin. she probably wouldn’t appreciate that.
to his concerns, they’re probably not back together… right?
so instead, he decides to keep himself busy. looking around at posters on the walls, to his guitar and books that are left unread.
maybe he should crack one open? he did fail algebra
“well? aren’t you gonna join me?”
he hears her ask, whipping his head towards the direction and his throat runs dry when his eyes fall at the sight of her bare breasts. a mischievous smile planted on her lips with a head tilt.
eddie seems to be loss at words for a moment. not wanting to come off as too excited because he knows he’s still at fault. yet a smile soon painted on his lips. “y-yeah… would love that”
she smiles watching him take off his shirt eagerly. giggling when he nearly trips over the carpet, cursing at it for almost making him fall.
he slowly reaches out to place his hand on hers before interlocking it. y/n eyes observe each and every single one of his tattoos on his chest, tracing it lightly with her other hand.
those beautiful brown eyes of his look into hers and she swears he puts her under a spell. feeling her knees about to drive down to the floor. how could a boy look this pretty and belongs to her?
the longing stare is enough said. both found a home when they gaze at eachother’s eyes. and peace soon, rebuilds itself inside him when eddie pulls her into a sweet kiss. soft lips molding into his lightly chapped ones, followed by a sigh of content escape from his mouth. he’s thinks he might be scaring her off but instead, she melts into the kiss.
his tongue slips into her mouth while he draws her body closer to his bare chest as she gasps softly.
this is the intimacy that they have been craving for so long after the fight. one that he wishes to never have to go through again because being away from her just feels like hell. and she wishes for the same.
they’re not lost anymore. the love is found once again when they’re back in each other’s arms.
he keeps one hand steady around her waist while her arms sling over his shoulders. the couple soon disappear into the bathroom to finally makeup for the lost time.
this is where he swears to keep his promise one more time,
to protect her heart with everything in him.
-
hopefully this is good enough. love u all mwah:)
as always feedbacks are welcome <3
tagging:
@munsonmolls @chaarrlliie @plaindonutsworld @protecteddiemunson4vr @ilovecupcakesandtea @renssonly @feltonswifesworld87 @eris-rose-86 @e0509 @depressedacidtest @downtoearthworm98 @bistardew @godsfavoritegirlll @livslifeonline @thicksexxualtension @janenerdstuff @wisestarlightwolf @littlemiss-yeehaw @lacrymosa-24 @bratckerman
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Have you played Yakuza 6 yet? If so ya got any kazumaji head canons based off the events of the game?
I absolutely love your ideas for them and I am beyond upset that Majima was barley in the game. Or even mentioned that much.
They did the boi dirty in this game, I swear.
*clenches my ass hard enough to shit diamonds*
oh I have OPINIONS about 6 I'll tell you that but it is good fodder for the kazumaji agenda 👀 I'mma be kinda rambly in this but I promise it all ties together kdjfjkldfkldf
so we all know Kiryu goes off to find Haruka and because I'm a big fan of dadjima, I can only imagine Kiryu lets him know while he's stuck in jail and Majima's just like WHAT
so Kiryu does a lot of self reflection but acting upon it is another matter. I can see Majima chastising him, saying she ran away cuz that's all Kiryu ever does (part of him is still pissy about him leaving in y3) and she's never had a healthy role model other than the king of hypocrisy. Kiryu would go on about how it's just to protect people yada yada but Majima would be like my guy, you left a bunch of kids in the care of your daughter who should not be parenting for you. you refuse any and all help because you think you can do it all on your own. you left me with Daigo who you said I wouldn't be babysitting AND YET—
I just want Majima to absolutely rail into him about how self serving he's acted despite better intentions. like of course Haruka ran away, look how much pressure she was under, what she went through in the idol bizz (maybe I'm a loser but I did not like Haruka's part in y5 that shit icked me), what you (Kiryu) do every time you feel like a burden to people. how naïve it was to think any part of Kiryu's past would leave him behind just because he wanted it to. how his lone wolf thing impedes on everybody else. how in 5 he literally says he needs to stop running from his past and he does it anyway. this game FRUSTRATES ME rrhrrhhrhrr KIRYU FRUSTRATES ME ACK. but also I have a thing for Majima just being angry at him, to actually lash out and spew all those feelings of being left behind or being refused to let help because Kiryu's stubborn. how he let himself be used all those years to help Kiryu out just because he asked and now once again Kiryu's off on his own, never changing his tune about how he doesn't wanna rely on people. Majima's not perfect either and frankly he communicates like shit too but I just want that RAGE to get out and explore how Kiryu would hear him but never listen. makes it all the more tragic when he finds out Kiryu "died."
*tho I must note, as much as it does irritate me, 6 makes sense entirely for Kiryu's character lol. nothing he does in it surprises me in the slightest so while I'm not a fan of the story, it's pretty fitting for him since he's the downfall of his own story half the time. and it's not so simple as just saying Kiryu's to blame. he's constantly forced to deal with shit just as much as he wants to be left alone. he struggles and he tries hard I'll give him that. I don't think he's a bad person for what he aimed to do in 6 but he's not infallible either. and sometimes it's just par for the course. like how he makes the compromise at the end of the game to disappear so his family can be at peace all the while in his history, he's had major problems doing what he's told - never truly disappearing anyway, going about whatever's gonna happen in gaiden. could you imagine if Haruka caught wind that some resting bitch face motherfucker is beating the shit outta armies somewhere? could you imagine her finding out that Kiryu left again?
honestly I think his character is really interesting cuz of this. he has good intentions and I feel like to him there's some expectation that people should understand this, that people should accept his choices. I think it's fun to explore how others react to that - how it's in a way offensive, that Kiryu thinks he knows what's best and how to handle it as if he has all the power and say. how pissed people feel about him shoving them away for the sake of their safety, etc. I don't think he'd listen to Majima tbh but I think it's important that someone unafraid of Kiryu's dumbassery would lay it out how it is to him in a way that cuts, more so than Haruka, Date or like Akiyama could.
ANYWAY, Majima's mad at him lol but can't really do anything atm due to the surrounding circumstances. I like to think he's got some of the Majima family watching out for Kiryu and Haruka if they happened to see them. Nishida at least cuz ain't no one gonna arrest a cutie patootie like him. it's not much but it's a little peace of mind. Majima knows Kiryu's reckless as all hell so he's worried and doubly annoyed that Kiryu doesn't care (about his own safety or that other people are concerned for him).
so since Majima has a fat 5 minutes in the whole game, there's not much to say about his involvement overall (other than oopsie stuck in jail) but I've had some thoughts about what all the jimas³ are doing in the meantime.
all the jimas are grouped together because I said so even tho realistically they'd prolly be separated lol. Daigo and Saejima are handling things well enough but Majima's bouncing off the walls in boredom and nothing irks him more than being stuck in one spot while Kiryu's out probably getting hit over the head with a stop sign and refusing medical attention. Daigo's losing his mind but he can agree Kiryu's bullheaded and talking about that keeps Majima distracted. Saejima does his part in trying to get Majima's mind off things now that they have all the time in the world to catch up on whatever.
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time passes and I'm rewriting the part in 6 where they show up at the end cuz I live in a fantasy world.
Kiryu "dies" and suddenly the three of them are released early, no doubt knowing his death had something to do with it. Daigo gets Kiryu's letter and Majima makes some joke about Kiryu's literacy but a quick scan of the letter makes Daigo's face drop. he reads it and Majima doesn't think it's real. he doesn't know how to feel. even Saejima is in disbelief. but the letter is vague. it's conjecture written by Kiryu of his own death so there's a chance he's fine. Kiryu's fine, he's always fine. he's been shot and stabbed a million times, he's fine.
but it's not long till it's confirmed by Date. Daigo's skeptical cuz his inner punkass doesn't trust cops. Saejima's on the same page but Majima's in full denial whilst also believing it to be true. his reaction is immediate and violent. he wants something to be done, he wants revenge but Daigo wants to follow Kiryu's wish to avoid war. Majima's so outraged he frankly couldn't give less of a shit about Kiryu's wishes so it's up to Saejima to wrangle him back *insert a dramatic fight here.* Majima gets his ass beat and he's just a mess. things move fast though - the fate of the clan is up in the air and he just couldn't care. but Daigo needs him and for that he pulls it together, just barely.
fast forward to when the jimas go into hiding. they get set up in a lil safehouse via Nick Ogata. I like to see it as a basic bitch type of place, very out of the way, very ignorable but the inside is nice enough. they have to stay cooped up as much as possible and it drives Majima insane. he's fidgety, always pacing. Saejima tries to calm him down and it works for a time until Majima falls into another slump and repeats.
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they took a few things with them that they could, mostly small stuff, some clothes and the like. Majima brought along a few of Kiryu's things, namely some pocket cars and a shirt. he wears it often, being very against washing it. Daigo's too stressed to notice but Saejima watches Majima just break down into someone he doesn't know. he's tired, closed off, guilt ridden. Saejima starts to think this is who Majima was after getting out of the Hole. a shell of a person taking blame for things out of his control. losing the will to care for himself as some sort of self imposed punishment for not doing more. seething in silence in the powerlessness.
his beard grows scraggly, his hair is unkept and the circles under his eye grows darker everyday. his behavior mimics his Sotenbori days where everything was for Saejima, all he could think about was Saejima, how he failed him, how if he tried hard enough he could see him again. it's not the case with Kiryu though. he didn't even get to see the body himself.
he's always on his phone reliving memories through photos and conversations. he freaks out when anyone touches the pocket cars and eventually the shirt gets worn out. he's spiraling while the others look on, unsure how to deal with someone whose entire personality revolves around having a fake one.
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Saejima takes initiative. maybe he's seen Majima like this before or maybe he hasn't. doesn't matter because he gives Majima a bit of tough love, telling him to get a grip. telling him that Kiryu wouldn't want to see him like this and, under his breath, he needs him in better shape so they can beat the shit outta whoever was responsible. it's not easy of course. it takes Majima awhile to learn how to live again and frankly he doesn't want to talk about Kiryu but Saejima forces him to - to get comfortable with mentioning him, enjoying the memories they had. letting him know it's okay to be vulnerable. it's not a kind or pleasant recovery but it's there. it's helping.
and perhaps some time under supervision, he goes to see Haruka and meets Haruto for the first time. he tries to keep a strong façade for her but she can see right through him and gets one of those rare moments where he's just quiet. where he's real. she catches him up on things and it's a rough one for the both of them, especially since he has to keep the visit short. she doesn't bother asking him where he's going afterward but he promises to keep in touch and that he does. she sends him a lot of photos and videos of the family and he backseat-parents Yuta whenever possible. Haruka's never been a fan of always having Kiryu at arms length but this arrangement helps her deal with the long distance since there's effort on both ends to stay close.
Majima's not used to having others around to help him cope but he eases into it decently enough without the Tojo Clan on his shoulders. he even gets along better with Daigo who has time now to focus more on himself and the grunge within his soul. he's a silly lil dork and that charm reminds him of Kiryu but in a way that doesn't send him spiraling. he starts to see all reminders of Kiryu in a more hopeful light, one that brings back his energy. for most of their home confinement, Majima wouldn't even go out as Goromi since half his confidence came from Kiryu's support. but now and then, with Saejima and Daigo backing him, he can tiptoe a bit back into his fav dresses, ones that Kiryu gave him, ones that hurt to put on because of the baggage they carry. he doesn't even have his wigs anymore so he assembles what he can, how he can into something he knows Kiryu would have called pretty regardless. it stills hurts but it helps.
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but, he'll always dip back into the pain of it all. missing intimacy and things taken for granted. he regrets his last words with Kiryu were criticisms knowing he's not perfect himself. maybe he's faced with realizations that he can't survive without certain people, that his attachment issues are brought to the forefront for everyone to see. it's ugly and embarrassing and for the first time in a long time he feels very seen. death's always been a reality for him and he's never cared much for it in regards to himself but losing someone so close, so suddenly? without closure or goodbyes? he's forced to deal with the frailty and mortality of someone he thought was invincible.
and it scares him.
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obsessedelusional · 2 years
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The New Girl
masterlist
parings ✦ eddie munson x reader
summary ✦ It’s your first day at a new school and your a nervous wreck. Sitting at a random table of boys might just change your life for the better when their leader take a special interest in you.
authors note ✦ I spend so much time writing Eddie fics and oneshots. I have a whole ass 40+ chapter finished fic I have yet to share with the world just cause I am too scared. Decided to start lightly with this and maybe post more in the future. Let me know what you think, good or bad. lol I think my problem is I’m so worried about my grammar and shit that I never post. So if that has a bunch of errors I’m sorry
⊹ ꙳ ✦ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹
You spent all summer dreading this day, your first day as a senior at Hawkins High. You’d be the new girl in the last year of school when everyone has already established their cliques, you’d be the outsider. To your surprise it wasn’t as painful as you’d imagined. First half of the day went by quickly, you sat in the period before lunch wondering where you were gonna sit. For a brief moment you considered spending it in the bathroom to avoid be the new girl sitting by her self but quickly decided against that idea. Concluding that being caught sitting in the bathroom for thirty minutes was far more embarrassing.
The bell rings breaking you out of your thoughts. The rest of class wastes no time, sighing you stand up and follow their lead. You’re the last one out of the room but that’s not before your stopped by the teacher.
“Y/N, right?” You nod yes in response. “How’s your first day so far?”
“So far so good. Everyone’s been really nice.” You realize there’s not much truth to that statement considering he’s the first person that’s took the time to talk to you.
“That great to hear, if you need anything at all don’t hesitate to ask.” He smiles reassuringly, you smile back and thank him before leaving the room.
Once in the cafeteria, you get in line and grab a tray. Thanking the lunch ladies as they slop on the mysterious food. In that moment you think to your self you’ll be bringing lunch from now on. Out of the line you’re greeted by the rows of tables filled with students.
Eyes scan the room quickly realizing there’s not many empty seats left. You watch them fill up as you stand there. You decide fuck it and go to sit down at a table filled with girls. You’re not fast enough because someone steals it before you, giving you an annoyed look before turning their back to you.
Down a few tables there a group of boys all wearing the same shirt, they look harmless enough. They’re only taking up half the table. You decide you’ll sit at the far end and pray that they leave you alone.
As soon as you walk over all their eyes are on you, probably wondering who the hell you are. Shock hits their faces when you actually sit down. You half smile before picking your fork up and start playing with your food. You can’t help but notice a taller long haired boy approaching the table, he’s wearing the same shirt. ‘The Hellfire Club’
“Who do we have here?” He says sitting directly across from you, a grin across his face. You tell him your name and his response is,”Who said you can sit here?”
“Didn’t realize I had to ask.” You retort, sort of irritated.
“I’m just givin’ you shit. I’m Eddie.” He laughs, “You new here?” Eddie asks knowing damn well she’s new, knowing he would have remembered someone as pretty as her.
“Yeah.”
“How you liken Hawkins?” Eddie asks.
“It’s nice so far.” You lie and Eddie sees right through you.
“You don’t have to lie to me. We’re all aware of how shit it is.” He laughs.
“It’s pretty shit.” You agree laughing quickly covering your mouth when you laugh, Eddie notices.
“You wanna actually come sit with us at that end of the table instead of being the loser all by your self?” Eddie teases.
“Sure.” You say warily. You watch as Eddie gets up and heads to the end to sit. One of the younger kids tries to argue but Eddie tells them to shut up.
“Scoot down.” He commands the younger kids and they listen. “You can sit by me.” He smiles motioning to the seat next to him. Grabbing your tray you make your way over to Eddie. You can feel all their eyes on you as you sit.
“Thanks. What’s the shirts for?” You ask curiously, attempting to start a conversation.
“We’re a DND club.” You look over to the young boy who spoke, “I’m Dustin.” He introduces himself.
“That cool I used to watch my older brother play all the time.” You smile, remembering you oldest brother.
“Have you played before?”
“No he wouldn’t let me.” You admit.
“Do you want to?” Eddie asks, regaining your attention.
“I dunno maybe.” You say smiling. Eddie’s only known you for a few minutes and he’s already can’t stop staring. He wants to know everything about you.
“I’m gonna be so real with you right now. The longer you sit here the less chance you have of having any type of social status.” Another kid speaks up, you look over to him before speaking.
“I don’t care about that stuff anyways.” You look back to Eddie who’s already smiling at you. You take this moment to look at his beauty. His eyes are a deep brown and you can’t help yourself but admire them.
Conversation amongst the rest of them start but you still have Eddie’s full undivided attention. “What brings you to Hawkins?”
You answer and spend the rest of lunch answering all his questions. While learning so much about him.
Eventually lunch comes to an end and Eddie sighs, he seemed upset. You were upset too, you could of spent all day getting to know him. You get up grabbing your tray to empty it into the trash.
Eddie follows behind, once you’re done he grabs your wrist softly. You turn around to face him and he says, “You should sit with us tomorrow again.”
“I’d love that.” You grin, happy you’ve found friends. Especially cause one of them is this real cute older guy.
-
The next day rolls around and you excitedly wait for lunch ready for the chance to talk to Eddie again. This time you skip the lunch line and make your way for their table. “Hi guys.” You say, sitting where you sat yesterday. Eddie’s not here yet but the rest of the guys greet you. Mikes going off about one of his teachers already assigned a ‘fuck ton’ of homework. You laugh when you feel the weight of someone sitting next to you. Smiling you turn your attention that way hoping it’s Eddie.
It’s not. Your smile fades quickly. A blonde haired boy fills his spot, he’s sporting a green lettermen jacket. “Why are you sitting with these freaks?” You’re in total shock and confused unsure of how to respond. “You should sit with us,” he points over to a table filled with cheerleader and football players. “You’re too pretty to be hanging out with these losers.” He laughs, his hand reaching for your hair letting his fingers run through it.
“No thank you.” You politely decline, pushing his hand away.
“Oh come on. Fuck these freaks.” He pouts.
You don’t know what comes over you but you spit,“Fuck off.”
“Oh she’s feisty.” He laughs, “Well if you ever change your mind and need some good dick you know where to find me.” Your jaw drops, shocked those words would come out of his mouth.
“Just leave her alone.” One of the guys speaks up.
“I bet you let that freak fuck you, huh? I saw they way you two were looking at each other yesterday.” He hands find its way in your lap, quickly slipping it way into between your thighs. Before he can get any farther, you do the unthinkable. Something you could never imagine yourself doing. You punch him square in the face, he quickly falls back. His hands gravitate to his nose, it’s bleeding. You look down at your fist, it hurts but you’re too much in shock to notice.
Looking up from your fist you’re greeted by Eddie. His hands cup you face, “Are you okay?” Tears start to fall down your face realizing what just happened. The blonde boy mutters fuck you before taking off blood staining his letterman. “What happened?” When you can’t respond, he grabs your hand, “Let’s get you out of here.” You don’t argue following Eddie out of the lunchroom, through a hall way, and out a door that leads to a nearly empty parking lot.
Eddie takes you to his van, opening the door for you. For some reason you get in, you feel like you can trust Eddie. He shuts the door behind you before making his way to the drivers side. “Do you want me to take you home?”
“No.” You say wiping the tears from you face, trying to calm down. “Just take me away from here. I don’t want to go home.”
“Okay.” He smiles softly.
-
Eddie and you drove the whole way a in silence. Occasionally glancing over at each other. Music filled the silence, Eddie hummed along. For a moment it crosses your mind that your alone with essentially a stranger. You just hope that he’s not gonna murder you and try to forget shake that thought.
Eventually you two arrive at a little lake you’ve never been to before. He reverses into a parking spot. “This is my favorite place to come to when I need to breathe.” Eddie gets out, walking behind his van. You can tell he’s opened the back so you let yourself out. Eddie’s sat in the back of his van his legs dangling from the edge.
For a few moments you look around the back of Eddie van. The back seats had been taken out and there were blankets and pillows laid out. You sit next to him scooting as close as you can. His arm falls on your shoulders, allowing you to rest your head on him. You both sit in silence for a few moments.
“What all did you see?” You ask.
“I walked into the lunch room and seen Jason Carver laying on the floor in front of you with a bloody nose.” He’s arm leaves your shoulder and grabs the fist you used to punch that guy. “Does it hurt? It looks like it hurts.” Eddie says while he’s gently examining it. Your knuckles are bruised.
“It hurts a lot.”
“Why did you punch him?” Eddie asks.
“He was being such a dick.”
“That’s Jason for you.” Eddie explains.
“He kept touching me after I turned him down.” Eddie noticeably tenses up. “I blacked out and when I came to he was on the floor. I’ve never don’t that before.”
“Well he deserved it. If he ever touches you again I swear to god I’ll kill him.” Eddie grits his teeth speaking.
“Hopefully he’ll leave me alone after today.” You sigh.
“You’re kinda bad ass.” Eddie smiles.
“How?”
“You punched Jason Carver in the face. You haven’t gone here long enough to realize how bad ass that is. Everyone hates him except his bone head friends who are just as terrible as him.”
-
You couldn’t explain it but you felt so comfortable around Eddie. You two sat there for a while talking about anything and everything. Eventually you two ended up laying down in the back of his van, next to each other facing each other as you talked. Your hands rested so closely together. You so badly wanted to grab his but chicken out. Eddie must of noticed you looking at his hand cause he does exactly what you were to chicken to do causing the biggest grin to form on your face almost too afraid to make eye contact with him. You can feel him getting closer, the butterflies in your stomach getting bigger.
Your phone goes off bringing you back to reality. It’s your dad. Fuck.
Quickly sitting up, letting go of Eddie and answering your dad starts with the questions, “Where are you? Your school says you never showed up to second half of classes after you got into a fight?” He sounds more concerned than angry, which calms you.
“I’m safe. I’ll explain when I get home. I love you.” He says he loves you before hanging up. “Can you take me home?” You groan annoyed you have to leave Eddie so soon.
“Yeah of course.” Eddie says, getting up and helping you out of the van.
-
You give Eddie directions to your home as his drives. A good twenty minutes later he parks in front of your home.
“I know what happened to you today was really shitty but for what it’s worth I had fun with you after the fact. Hope you don’t get in too much trouble.” He says causing you to smile.
“If punching some jock in the face meant I could hang out with you I’d do it again.” You laugh to yourself.
“You don’t have to punch anyone in the face to hang out with me.” Eddie jokes with you, you look over to him to find him already looking at you and decide in that moment to do something else you’d never imagine yourself doing. You lean in closer to Eddie, reaching over the center console. Your lips meet his. Eddie seems taken aback but slowly lets him self kiss you. His hands finding their way to your face. You two make out for a few moments, Eddie eventually being the one to pull away to catch his breath.
“You’re kinda bad ass.”
“How?” You laugh.
“I’ve wanted to do that for hours now but I was too chicken shit. You just went for it.” He smiles, smitten.
“Can I go for it again?” Eddie nods before kissing you again.
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jupitersfall · 16 days
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cate hc’s? 😁😁 with a fem!reader who has water powers, and maybe they met in class instead of her and luke yk
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Cate Dunlap Headcanons !
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you met her in mr. brink's class when you sat next to her
mainly cause you didn't know anybody yet and you didn't want to look dumb sitting by yourself
but also cause you thought she was pretty
when class started, you realized you had forgotten a pencil
so you had to ask cate for one
which sparked a conversation
because who could be dumb enough to forget a pencil on the first day of class?
you, apparently
after that, the two of you continued to sit next to each other
and eventually became each other's first friend
loser!cate hehehe she's cute
over time you realized your feelings weren't so platonic
cue awkward flirting and shy giggling
staring at her while she talks about stuff cause when did she get so smart? when did her voice get so soothing?
cate didn't find out about your powers until she'd spilt her water bottle all over your notebook
gaping at the water as it floats off the table and into the air
she thought it was so cool though
making her favorite animals or different shapes out of water to impress her...
or so you could see her smile
who said that?! not me
one day you guys are talking in your dorm, and she mentions luke and all the sudden you're like what?? fire?? you like fire???
feeling very betrayed after 😞
jk lol but you were definitely a little bitter
"water is, like, way better than fire, you know. i would totally beat him in a fight."
like four months of pining later, and then the two of you are at a party, and you're a little too drunk, and cate is looking a little too pretty
and the two of you are alone, and she's staring up at you with those pretty blue eyes
and all of the sudden, you're leaning in to kiss her like you've done it a million times before
you were pretty sure it was just the alcohol in her system, because cate kissed you back
and then again, and again, until the two of you were making out in the back of this party, hands wandering over clothes like you were starving
the next morning you woke up in your dorm with a killer headache, and cate was beside you, drinking a cup of coffee and scrolling through her phone
"hey, finally. i was wondering when you were gonna wake up. don't worry, we didn't sleep together."
good, you wanted to be sober for that
but there was a long talk after, which didn't help your headache
after that day, the two of you were closer
it was a very unspoken change
you weren't sure why, but it didn't matter to you
you still got to kiss her, and touch her, and be with her
you didn't know when you became official, that had been pretty unspoken too
you only started noticing differences when girls would actively avoid you
jordan was the one that brought it up
"you're like a human magnet except you repel every girl at this school."
you go walking off to cate to ask her about it, cause who else could be the reason?
she acts innocent at first, all doe eyed and confused
"what're you talking about? maybe they just dont want to get in the way of us."
but she's got that sly little smirk on her face, and of course she'd be the cause
"i'm sorry, i'm sorry. i couldn't help myself, i thought it was funny. ill stop, though. promise you're mine?"
and of course you said yes. how could you even think about another girl when she's right in front of you?
not possible
anyways she's my baby
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ptsdangeldust · 8 months
Text
tw rape / abuse / suicidal ideation / self harm
can i just fucking say that the "poison" scene was just fucking flawless to me. as a survivor of rape and psychological abuse it was so fucking hard to watch and hit on every note i wanted it to. the suicidal ideation, the self destruction, the pain, the torment, the addiction, the hopelessness, everything.
[this got long LOL big analysis of ep4 basically]
also it's a little funny how easily i called it when the pilot came out that angel was gonna have ptsd and cope with it through hypersexuality . like this was obvious from the start to me and they do telegraph / foreshadow it from the first episode pretty well in my opinion. like ALMOST too much. but at the same time i'm kind of glad. like that's what i like about the show is that it *is* so raw and over the top when it talks about this kind of thing. that's why i like campy edgy uncomfortable shit bc where the fuck else am i gonna hear anyone specifically hit the perfect sweet spot of just exploitative-feeling enough to feel palpably uncomfortable in a way that just like. perfectly conveys this message. in my opinion, obviously.
it's like so crazy to me that i had this exact high expectation for the show and adjusted for edginess and got exactly what i wanted and then some. like. god. they hit every note in succession all at once and then tied it off with a beautiful, nuanced but genuinely well paced and well thought out resolution.
"loser, baby" was so fucking perfect as the counterpoint to "poison" in this episode. also charlie coming in and being purehearted but not knowing what she's doing and making it worse. but angel ultimately understanding that she meant to help and it's not her that's the problem obviously. and then husk is ultimately the one to give a shit about angel (with some encouragement, which like i honestly appreciate that he doesn't take angel's bullshit and isn't just the like Token Black Savior who has no character or agency of his own [of course i'm white so don't take me as the authority on this issue but i'm certainly aware of it]) and like not only try to stop him from self destructing but like relate his experience and make him admit he has a fucking problem. sooooo much of abuse is built on making the victim think they're at fault for what they're going through. the way val makes him look in the mirror and say "yes" outloud to himself over and over while literally holding his head and threatening him was such a good way of driving that home. and then we see angel have so much pride poked at so easily when he's called fake because he's SO aware he's putting on an act. he lets himself be exploited because he thinks it gives him a sense of control. can't be called fake if i'm an actor. can't prove i'm ever real. never have to BE real. never have to admit that anything is wrong and come to terms with it.
and so husk comes right the fuck out and says it. you're a loser. you're washed up. you're a has been. you're self destructive. you hurt everyone around you. ..... and you're not alone. THAT'S the important part. that's the real thing that gets you out of abuse. people. not being alone. like not just KNOWING that THEORETICALLY you're not alone but actually having people show up and help you and put in the work and relate to you and listen to you and let you listen to them. that's why abusers chronically work to isolate people. because it's so much easier to exploit someone who has absolutely no support system. who only answers to them. who has no one to turn to if shit goes sour.
ok also the fucking hypersexual self harm? i have NEVER seen that portrayed so accurately and so explicitly before. i feel like basically every single time i see it talked about at ALL in media it's either 1) portrayed as like sexy or ultimately good 2) strays totally the opposite direction and is talking more about cycle of abuse shit (which yes that's also important but not what i'm after) 3) really just hinted at / i have to like extrapolate it from vague hints or 4) exists in shitty media that is not ultimately trying to tell a story about escaping abuse it's just talking about a tragic waif and trying to make you feel sad. which is just another kind of exploitation really. so it was very refreshing to see it made very clear that angel was going around *trying* to get drugraped (which is NOOOOOT the same as consent. but i'm not going to get into that) because he was trying to hurt himself. he knew it wasn't good for him and he sought it out anyway. he could have wound up dead and he did not care. that's how low his self esteem is. that's how little he thinks of himself. that's how absolutely terminal his suicidal ideation is. i like used the word 'passive' at first but no i would not call that passive he is clearly actively suicidal hsuidguhds (ftr passive suicidal ideation is like. 'i wish i could go to sleep and not wake up.' but not actually acting on it. active is when you start purposely not looking both ways when you cross the street. that's basically what angel was doing)
anyway yeah. ep4 was kind of the peak for me i'm ngl HUIDGHIS obviously i'm very excited to see where things are going in general but especially more huskerdust........ i would like live if they didn't actually end up together but it feels clear to me that they genuinely care about each other and at least angel does seem to have... romantic-leaning feelings for him. would be cool if they had some scene where husk is like just cuz i care about you doesn't mean i'm going to be your magic saviour through love or whatever. bc i feel like it would be so easy for angel to immediately want and/or expect that. i did personally coming out of my abuse where i was absolutely desperate for real actual non-abusive love of any kind but i was NOT remotely healthy enough to truly accept it then even if it had actually been handed to me and i wound up in something that was..... better, yes, but ultimately still toxic and not completely ideal. not abusive, no, just not like. healthy. lol. but i do have good healthy happy love now so i'm glad lol <3 but like anyway this is a common thing with abuse survivors and it would *make sense* to see it but like i wouldn't put it past them to just go straight into "and then angel got better immediately and they got together and everyone lived happily ever after the end" HSDUIGSHUID but like idk man. we'll see LOL
also i did want to comment on like...... the fact that the scene was worked on by someone with a legit rape fetish who was like straight up into angel/val as a ship and thought it was like cool and fun or whatever. like. i really don't think the scene itself came off as glorifying rape or abuse. it's blatantly obvious that it's not good and the emphasis is placed entirely on angel's pain. and like it's. it's not porn. it's evocative. it's explicit. but the purpose of the scene is not "look at this hot sexy sex" it's "look at this horrifying abuse". like yes obviously there are gonna be people who get off on it but people can get off on anything if they try hard enough. porn is art explicitly meant for jacking off. not everything about sex is porn. i think if you interpret it as glorifying sex you're honestly out of your goddamn mind. the song ends with angel talking about how he wants to fucking die because of it. is that glorification to you?? really???
ultimately, *I* think it's good. i think, objectively, the team did an extremely good job. give them an award or something. i swear. where's the oscar. my boy angel needs his oscar LOL
... one last note, because this is tumblr: this is very triggering material. probably it should've had a better warning of some kind. but it is telegraphed/foreshadowed like i said and the show is rated 16+ on amazon (i feel like it should be 18+ imo but it's like. it's repeatedly listed as being for adults/"R rated" in promo material at least) and sex and violence are listed right there at the top of each episode where it shows the rating so like. idk man. that's as much warning as is usually given for this kind of thing ngl. i absolutely am not saying it's not triggering. but it is important to portray triggering things. it is important to talk about these things to give people in these situations someone to relate to and to give them the language to understand how to escape abuse, first of all, and like also art in general *should* be challenging. i think they genuinely said important, unique things and said them well. they did wayyyy better than i thought they would. for real. like esp coming from viv knowing her past like. clearly someone in the room actually knew what they were doing lmao (one of the writers for hazbin also worked on the episodes in helluva that covered similar abuse recovery material so. you know)
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