#and I think Hayden would love seeing everyone go crazy over him and it would be soo sweet to see his reaction

[lacebird]

Imagine if Hayden pulled a Tom Hiddleston and came to a con dressed at Anakin in front of thousands of people.

Like they announce Hayden and then there seems to be an error and all the lights go off, and then you hear Hayden’s voice mixed with Darth Vader’s breathing. Lightning strikes and at the center of the stage, Hayden as Anakin appears and the crowd goes batshit insane. Hayden does a little bit and interacts with the crowd too.

The way this would be the more iconic thing to ever happen 😭

[neoncat666]

extremely long shadows over welde character analysis post

by extremely long i mean its fucking 3k words cause I go too silly.

Spoilers up to ep 8 and its mostly rambles so apolocheese. I also posted this on my twitter so if u saw it there here's an actual text version LOL

Argentum:

Oh my god. You are soooo…… First of all, in the story we’ve gotten this. Argentum is a strong headed, curious person who is a bit stubborn and holds themself at a bit of a graceful appearance on the outside. They are smart, witty, but also a bit of a temper especially when it comes to frankly a little stupid ideas. They are also kind and care for others. We were shown from the beginning that they enjoy their work and meeting fans and even with people they just met are willing to help them stay safe. Also they’re a little dumb. Sometimes curiosity overrides rational thinking and that was shown when they touched the weird fucking webbing in the cave and also that ENTIRE plan when there was the confrontation between Vhaeraun and Lolth which was fucking actually crazy. This isn’t even beginning to talk about the head friend. I am constantly thinking about that voice and who that could be. Brings us speculation around them. Argentum is not human, or at least fully human. Their eyes are def not human and Hayden is a silly lil guy who would pull a trick like that. There was one speculation on them possibly being a Kalashtar and I think it could fit but honestly for now it hasn’t been on my forefront. I also bought the inscriptor class finally and was looking at how possibly they were built. What stats what subclass ect. I don’t fucking know.. Now you might be asking “Hey why don’t you just ask?” CAUSE IM SCARED. But honestly cause I wanted to see if I could figure it out myself lmao. It boiled down to either Mystery or Historian subclass is what Snail helped me narrow to. Could be wrong tho. There’s also little tidbits about Argentum that have come from outside the sessions like when I asked if they had a canonical birthday cause “celebrating fictional characters birthdays is cringe” “fuck you happy birthday argentum” is funny. Still honestly wanna know if any of the party has canon birthdays. I got hit with the “Oh they don’t know their own birthday.” and then swindled. There was also the discussion on Hayden’s pcs never really having parents or family and Argentum was included in that list which more or less got confirmed in session this episode (7). I still don’t know their motives, still don’t know their relationships with others because it seems everyone is connected to someone except Argentum, and I still don’t know who their patron is and if that is the same as the voice in their head. Love the silly though

Phoenix:

Fifi….. Not much was known about you until today and holy shit did it rock my world. Before we had known he was the apprentice to Ipswich and was sent in his place as guest of honor. We also then found out he was a spy working on tailing Lolth and that’s kinda all we knew about Phoenix for a bit, at least heavy lore wise. He’s a sarcastic, witty, bitch and I love him so much. I could never surpass Snail as Phoenix Enjoyer but it’s close. We learned a bit more during the nightmare drink sequence where he met his patron and got his powers fucking zapped. A couple things stood out to me from it. How his patron looked and specific wording from Phoenix. We know Ipswich isn’t mortal anymore but Phoe had said something along the lines of “I’d get my ass kicked and be right back here the next day.” He is surrounded by death or even just the undead. His patron deals in undead magic and I don’t think if Phoenix gets knocked down he wouldn’t be back again looking all fine the next day. We don’t know his patron’s name which like. Fuck. but lmao. Anyways Ipswich is tracking him like crazy and says he has this important quest although we don’t know a lot of Phoe’s thoughts and feelings on what he’s doing. To me it almost seems like he’s a tool or pawn for others and idk if I can fully call him a good person. Doing a bit of research into his pact and such it seems that he’s just going to possibly lose more and more humanity as he gets stronger but also i couldn’t tell you how much he has already. There’s also the whole cousins and throne thing that got dropped this episode. It seems his family is also involved with this whole scheme but Phoe is the favourite of the bunch. The idea that he could possibly be royalty was also thrown around and i think if he was like secret prince it would be from a large family all vying for a throne or he is working with Ipswich and others to usurp the current ruler and take the power for himself. Although knowing Fifi it’ll probably be like a secret third option. Not much except he’s so 90s movie older sister to me and the fact Ipswich runs a school for swindlers which is kinda funny.

Sunder:

Babygirl. Pookie. Love of my life who I want to kill me. God. This is now my love letter to you. I saw you across the bar and thought you were sooo scary and I’ve been enraptured ever since. Anyways that’s a freak. He’s not the most talkative and seems more lonely despite everything. They’re funny, loyal, kind, and ruthless. We didn’t get much for Sunder for a bit until mostly the shopping episode. We learned a bit through Kelly and the nightmare drink of what makes up Sunder but it didn’t really culminate until the head crushing I would say. Honestly I don’t even care I just fucking love the way Sunder is played. Like I’m sitting here trying to find words that aren’t just I think he’s neat cause I do think analyzing him is intriguing. They’re going to get angry and they’re going to get violent and you are not safe. It’s something that was so surprising at first because of how much Sunder kind of fell into the background. The nightmare drink gave us the first look at this, that Sunder had apparently killed someone, a kid even, but a lot of their violence was played off as a joke by the community, I know I did. Learned today that the person in that nightmare was Ilmater and it shows that she wasn’t lying when she said that visions and nightmares of this accident are a plague. I believe them when they say it was an accident and idk how young they were but to harbor that from a young age will fuck you up. Their morals are something that intrigues me i would say the most. No trouble in murder although I assume that’s more or less towards people who piss him off or are generally bad people. He’s kind hearted and that’s shown a lot especially with this last interaction I’d say. I still need to like rewatch a lot of parts of it but “we were just kids” genuinely fucking rocked me to my core and it got me i won’t lie. We’re still very early in but idk, I want to see Sunder truly happy and not haunted by the ghosts of their past. I feel this was most likely the first step but it’s hard to say as we go forward. I think violence and blood will always follow it’s just how they choose to take it.

The Wall:

I think now Wall is the character we know the least about, at least to me. We know his duty to Eilistraee and his duty to Zephrael and also his little foodie quirks (love him dearly) but outside of that I don’t think we know a lot. He’s the character I have the least notes for now but I do know this. He is loyal to a fault, a little dense, kind, and revels in battle and violence. I think about his nightmare and the fear of losing her and the sword then what happened to this episode. He’s had this since he was a child and then he had this dream, this trip to the beastland plane and looked Eilistraee in the eye and fought her. I believe he still loves her, cares for her, but I also think it has changed since that episode no doubt. Rewinding a bit, I think a bit about him being told he has to be pure of heart in order to wield the sword. What does pure of heart truly mean? Wall loves fighting and murder. He actively committed torture. Also he’s the bodyguard for an objectively bad man. There’s the argument of his intentions are pure although I doubt you can do a lot of what he did and have those intentions be fully pure. It’s just something I think about more than probably a normal person should teehee. Anyways the conversation he and Rae had at the beginning of this session should classify as psychological warfare cause I genuinely do not think I’m ever going to recover. I have been talking about it for weeks how they are the chosens, favored, by literal enemies and seem to have some sort of hit on them by a couple of deities now. I thought about how it might affect relationships and how Wall views them. We know he’s very loyal but I always wondered how far he would need to be pushed before that is broken. Seems like an extreme amount. His morals are probably what intrigue me the most tbh. I’d kill to know what his alignment is LMAO. Most of all I just really love the Wall because he is goofy and silly but he also isn’t a stupid brick wall that doesn’t know anything and I really enjoy seeing the times he gets to explain things. Fuck it we Wall.

Zephrael:

Okay so this will be the longest one cause I’m biased and yes Zephrael is my favourite. I always feel a little bad when it comes to that and showing that favouritism because I truly do love the entire party so much. This hit me the most when the show was just starting out and I did feel like I needed to show how much I loved each character and not just focus on Rae lol. I hope this thread can at least show that (if you even make it this far) Anyways Zephrael is a fucking freak and I love him so much. I’ve done multiple posts on him before and yeah Im gonna repeat some of it here i wont lie. Right out the gate we probably learn the most and yet the least about Rae’s past and present. He is an emissary for the reformed church of Lolth and an honored guest. He had known about Edo’s work before and talked about how it had helped with relations between the public and the reformed church. This means everything and nothing to us. But it does show that despite Rae’s… oddness, he is extremely well spoken when he wants to be and I think about that speech a lot. The next few episodes gave us some more information yet also a lot more questions. These weird pains that seem to predict disasters, the extreme phobia of spiders despite being a paladin of Lolth, and his both egotistical yet self deprecating attitude. It was fascinating to watch him because he clashed but never in a way that made him irredeemable and I’ll go more into that at the end section. A few early things I thought about a lot before the catalyst that was the nightmare drink were who the reformed church was, where did Zephrael come from, why was he chosen as this ambassador, and why he didn’t know undercommon but knew abyssal. These are still questions I have to this day LMAO. The nightmare drink vision I possibly overanalyze the most next to Phoenix’s. It stood out due to the fact that it wasn’t, bad. Rae could see again, he saw his father and best friends again, he got told he was going to learn the truth again. Why was this considered a bad thing? Everyone else experienced horrors and regrets yet Zephrael got sorrow. It jumpstarted the part aasimar Rae theory tho. Angel imagery Rae makes me clinically insane I won’t lie and his father having these large wings and bright white light did not help. There’s the big question of what he is and also how he joined the church. Hell, even how he feels about the church as well, truly at least. During one of the hiatuses fandom went crazy and Snail Snailmuds dropped out of nowhere that the runes on Rae’s body weren’t just random but fucking translated abyssal that said “PAIN CHAOS POWER” which first of all goes hard second of all what the fuck.

Theory crafting for Zephrael always feels like climbing uphill and also being constantly shot at cause every time something happens with that man it turns out to be a secret third thing going on oh mygod. Anyways I’ve discussed whether or not he was forced into this church, was kidnapped, born into it, ect because at the end of the day, he seems to very much be a tool or pawn for this church and/or Lolth. Also the whip being an artifact of Lolth or whatever they’re called again I forgot??? What the fuck dude. ALSO HIM SLEEPING IN BATHTUBS????? Grizzly has said this will make sense later but genuinely what the fuck there is something wrong with him. Moving on, revelation about the tattoos comes out and we get the torture episode. Well we get the holy shit they just killed those guys begining and then torture. First of all, I cheered louder than anyone else when Rae actually did fucking combat instead of running away and also the fact he can use his whip. Anyways dumb and dumber torture a guy and first of all the lay on hands to keep him alive during torture was insane and I hope to see it again in anything and it’s also where it’s learned that the tattoos on him were “forcibly engraved” which was honestly brushed off and a lot happened that I think most people forgot but I didn’t cause I’m crazy. Anyways moving on from THAT we get the typical Rae. Dodging questions when Argentum tries to interrogate him and also dunno if he’s just fuckin lying or not when he does actually answer them.

Episode 6 and 7 are where I think Rae slightly pivots. Not really noticeable but he feels a little more, close. It was also a change I noticed with the cast and I think that helped a lot of character dynamics as well. Rae’s stupid beef with Argentum was so fucking funny and I do think about him wanting to heal Sunder before himself after the Bulette because if he heals Sunder, how would that help him. Yes they’re his bodyguard but the monster is dead and it’s not like Sunder can heal him back. It was a decision that I think was the most different for Rae because he was shown to care deeply for Wall but not so much the others as much. He still doesn’t care for the others as much as he does The Wall but I do think he has grown a fondness or care for the others whether he wants to or not. And thats the thing, I could not tell you if he does actually wanna care for them or not. Yes they are allies and help but he seems to try and keep things at a transactional level or how much power it may bring him. He still does but like his dynamic with Argentum seems closer cause the antagonizing feels more like siblings getting on each other’s nerves rather than a growing distance. I think Sunder also displaying that brutality may have put him more into Rae’s good books too. Anyways he read a fucking book huge day. Now he has even worse mommy issues. Ep 7 killed me with hammers but that was spoken about. His relationship with Wall is something that fascinates me though. Rae is selfish, it’s not hidden at all, yet he does seem to care deeply for Wall and almost defends him more than he would defend himself. It’s nice to see for this bodyguard and his charge dynamic but ep 7 spread some light on it and I do think their bond will outlive the will of the Gods but what do I know, I’m not anyone at that table. Zephrael is rude, odd, egotistical but also masochistic and does care deeply when he wants to and you don’t see that kind of character as much I wanna say. He’s my favourite cause his weird gnc swag enraptured me thats all he is post over.

Not actually over cause there’s one last thing. These characters would not be these characters without the wonderful players behind them. Each episode brings out better and better performances that have me actually going crazy over them. I genuinely wouldve had nothing to write about if it weren’t for the fact everyone brings so much life into these characters and loves them so much that they feel so fucking real. They don’t feel flat or simple but very nuanced characters that I love to study and even be wrong about (i actually hate being wrong and every time im wrong i get so ashamed) but Argentum’s flourishes and talks to get out of situations, Phoenix’s wit and holy shit that dread form voice, Sunder during the market fight and then the softer scene with Varic, Wall’s humor and even talking about the more serious stuff, and Zephrael’s ability to balance harshness and endearing at the same time. That’s Hayden, Leizu, Juzo, Ben, and Grizzly and I genuinely cannot fucking talk about the performances enough. I’ve thought about making a post just about it but I fear I just wouldn’t be able to articulate what I wanna say enough. Then obviously it wouldn’t even be possible without the fucking amazing world building and npcs Jonah has provided. Everything is so immersive and I find myself caring for each and every npc we meet whether caring for their safety or caring too much cause I dislike them. Every npc sticks with me and I grow so attached so quickly because they feel so real in this world that also feels so fucking real. It feels like we are just peeking into another world and I actually can’t multitask when watching sow cause I get too sucked in. It’s really hard to do that and I talk about it a lot but never really publicly so I thought I would here.

Anyways for real this time post over, this ended up way longer than I thought it was gonna be so ur a real one if you read this all the way through lol. I’m off to go think about sow merch again as I wait for permission and stuff cause im crazy. See ya later

[asharkapologist]

May the 4th (Star Wars Day) Special Post

Happy May the 4th, everyone! Although I don’t post too much about Star Wars, believe me when I say that Star Wars is one of my favorite movie franchises out there, and The Clone Wars is one of my favorite TV shows of all time. So, in order to celebrate Star Wars Day, I decided to be positive and say at least three nice things about every live-action, theatrically released Star Wars movie, including Solo and Rogue One. So, let’s begin.

The Phantom Menace

Call me crazy, but I actually like the political stuff. Maybe that’s because I like political science and history, but I honestly don’t mind the Senate scenes at all. I think that, for a film trilogy that takes place when the Jedi were still around and working in tandem with the soon-to-fall Republic, political scenes were needed to worldbuild and set the setting.

Duel of the Fates. Need I say more? One of the best musical scores and duels in all of Star Wars--maybe even movies in general.

The podracing was very well done, in my opinion. If you ask me, it still looks convincing by today’s standards, and is suitably thrilling, and Jake Lloyd’s acting was pretty decent in the podracing sequence.

Attack of the Clones

The scene where Anakin’s mom dies and he slaughters the Tusken Raiders is very well done. And it’s excellent (and more violent and chilling) in the novelization. (In fact, I would fully recommend reading the prequel novelizations, they are excellent).

Across the Stars is a beautiful love score that communicates the love that Anakin and Padme have for each other, as well as their very tragic fate.

There’s a really good deleted scene where Anakin and Padme visit Padme’s family that I wish they had kept in the movie. It’s very cute, fleshes out the relationship between Anakin and Padme, and I really like how Padme’s family interacts with Anakin.

Revenge of the Sith

Palpatine is incredibly entertaining in this movie. You can tell Ian had a blast playing him.

The scene where Padme tells Anakin that she’s pregnant and his reaction to the news is perfectly written and acted. Hayden does such a good job with his line delivery and facial expressions--you can tell the emotions he’s going through as he’s reacting to the news that he’s going to be a father so, so well.

This movie does not hold back on the emotional trauma. When I first saw RotS, I cried incredibly hard, and I think the scene that really started the waterworks was the scene where the score “Padme’s Ruminations” play, where she and Anakin are looking out their respective windows during sunset, right before Anakin makes the choice that will change the course of galactic history forever: going to interfere with Palpatine’s arrest. There’s no dialogue in the scene, save a brief voice-over of Palpatine, and when Anakin starts to cry in that scene, so do I. The music is chilling, and, once again, Hayden’s acting is excellent. He doesn’t have to say anything for you to know what emotions he’s feeling.

Solo

Donald Glover KILLS it as Lando. Stole the show.

It’s a small background detail, but I really like the Imperial propaganda posters/videos/holograms you can see in public transit places. It definitely adds to the overall immersion and worldbuilding of this point in the galaxy’s history. 

Okay I kind of liked the way that Han got his last name. Unpopular opinions, but I think it was funny. Love how some random guy created the last name of one of the most influential people/heroes in the galaxy.

Rogue One

The music? Super underrated. The score “Your Father Would Be Proud” makes me very emotional and suits the scene very well.

K-2SO is the best droid in the franchise. Yes, he is better than C-3PO and R2. You cannot convince me otherwise. 

Like, Revenge of the Sith, this movie does NOT hold back. It straight up kills all of the main characters, and shows that just because you do something heroic doesn’t mean that you’re going to get a happy ending. And it shows that you don’t have to be a space wizard, politician, or part of some important lineage in order to make a difference within the universe. 

Bonus one because this is one of my favorites: The hallway scene with Darth Vader. Enough said.

A New Hope

I mean…this is literally the movie that started it all? Without this movie, we would have no Star Wars.

Han, Luke, and Leia play off each other better than any other main characters in the franchise. I love their back and forth as they’re escaping the Death Star.

I really love the meeting scene with all of the commanders, moffs, important people, etc. are talking about the rebels, the Force, etc. I think that scene perfectly establishes the character and organization of the Empire, and it’s interesting, since it shows that Vader respects Tarkin, even though he could easily kill him. (I really love how The Clone Wars built on this.)

The Empire Strikes Back

This is one of my favorite movies of all time. It’s hard to pinpoint specific things that I like, because, like, everything is borderline perfect.

It has one of the greatest plot twists in all of cinema history. Like, sure, Vader being Luke’s father is common knowledge now, but when it first came out? Nope. I would have loved to be in the cinema, watching that scene for the first time, and getting my mind blown. 

The duel between Luke and Vader is so underrated, in my opinion. Like, sure, it’s not as flashy as some of the duels in the prequels, but the stakes are high, and I love how Luke and Vader utilize their surroundings to fight. (Doesn’t beat Darth Maul using a hallway to fight in TCW, though). It’s probably my third favorite duel in the franchise.

Bonus because I love this move: it shows that Leia is Force Sensitive. Her using the Force in the sequels did not come out of nowhere.

Return of the Jedi

The celebration music is SO GOOD. One of my favorite Star Wars tracks of all time. It’s one of the few times a Star Wars movie has a definitive happy ending, and it’s so satisfying seeing the characters celebrate and have fun together, having won a war that was going on for over two decades.

Again, call me crazy, but I love seeing Hayden’s Anakin as a force ghost. That tied the prequels and original trilogy together wonderfully.

The scenes in the throne room of the second Death Star is some of the best scenes in Star Wars. There’s real drama, danger, and other powerful emotions. The Emperor really shows how evil he is here.

The Force Awakens

Finn is such an interesting character, and is perfectly used in this movie. Humanizing a stormtrooper, who, previous to this movie, had been nothing but blaster fodder that the heroes easily and effortlessly gun down was a cool concept.

Hux is at his best here. That speech? Perfectly acted by Domhall Gleeson.

Honestly, I’m glad that they made the main character female. Like, say what you want about the sequels or Rey’s abilities, but, even if her character wasn’t written perfectly (well--it was written perfectly, which is a bit of an issue lol), it was good to have a female Jedi in a live-action movie. Some people say “well, the prequels had female Jedi.” Yes, but those Jedi were on screen for such a short amount of time that you could literally blink and miss them. “Clone Wars had female Jedi.” Yes, they did, and Ahsoka is one of my favorite Star Wars characters of all time. However, a lot of people who go and watch Star Wars in the movies don’t go out and watch side TV shows or read the comics/books. And if you ask me, you shouldn’t have to search side material if you’re just a casual Star Wars fan to find female representation. I am genuinely glad for all of the women who are Star Wars fans who only choose to see the movies (and that doesn’t make them any less fans than people who watch the shows and read the books/comics) who felt empowered seeing a main character who was a female Jedi. 

The Last Jedi

Kylo Ren is written excellently here. His inner conflict is SO. WELL. ACTED. By Adam Driver. That man carried the sequels.

Rey, too, is at her best. In this movie, she fails. She struggles to get through to Luke, and she fails to turn Kylo to the light, and she loses the fight against Snoke. But she grows, and in this movie, she’s very compelling.

I love Luke and Kylo’s fight. Not only is it well choreographed, but the dialogue between the two of them is top-notch, too.

Rise of Skywalker

Honestly? I really like the back and forth dialogue between Poe, Finn, and Rey. Those actors have really good chemistry.

I do appreciate Palpatine quoting Revenge of the Sith, since Disney likes to pretend the prequels don’t exist.

The movie is very fast-paced and makes for a very energetic viewing experience

Well. That’s it. Happy May the 4th once more!

[darthkruge]

Can we have some dad ani x mom reader where leia goes to her first date with han and Anakin is so overprotective till the reader talks some sense in him?

Anakin Skywalker x Reader ~ Family

Summary: Anakin goes into Dad Mode when Leia is going on her first date with Han and the Reader helps him realize he’s being a tad overprotective. 

Warnings: Slight language, Anakin being overprotective, Reader being amused by Anakin’s antics, the usual (by that I mean fluff)

Words: 1.4k

A/N: Omg of course! I love Dadakin and so yes I think yes <3. I know you asked for mom!reader but I tried to keep it gender neutral, I hope that’s okay! Also I really thought I’d mess this up horribly but I’m kind of… happy with it?? Shocking, I know. Also I’m sad because mans deserved a family smh. I didn’t know what to title this for the life of me but it’s okay.

gif credit (x) (he looks so freaking pretty i cannot cope)

“Nope, not happening!” Anakin said, pacing around your Coruscant apartment.

“Dad, please!”

“No!” 

Leia groaned, looking to you for help. “Please tell him he’s being ridiculous!”

You nodded towards your daughter knowingly. “Anakin, come on, she’s old enough, it’s fine!”

“Y/N, no! Have you seen the guy? He looks like he’d… I don’t know… leave his fingernail clippings in the bathroom or something! Or not tip after going out to dinner because he had to keep his singles ready for the strip club!”

You snorted at your husband's comments, watching him walk a hole into your floor as your daughter helplessly ran her fingers through her hair.

“You can’t just make the decisions for me! You’re supposed to trust me! I like him, I have good judgment. This isn’t fair and you know it!” Leia’s anger was palpable as she spoke, her words sharp. 

Anakin’s eyes softened. “Look, Leia, I know you like him. But I know guys like him, he’s bad news. You’re not going.”

Leia looked like she was about to scream so you decided this was a good time to intervene. “Ani, come talk to me in the kitchen please?” You said, basically dragging him by the arm. 

“Y/N, come on. Are you seriously considering letting her go out with him?”

“Yeah! I am! Anakin, we can’t protect the kids forever! Listen, I’ve seen him interact with her, he’s different. He’s kinder, sweeter. I don’t know, I just think we should let her do this.”

“But he’s a notorious asshole!”

You conceded. “I’ve heard. But still! Look, Leia’s a good kid, she’s logical, and she can definitely hold her own if he’s shitty. And don’t you think we should try not to judge until we meet him ourselves? Besides, on the off-chance this date is a mistake, isn’t it better she finds out now when she still has us to help her feel better afterwards? I don’t want our daughter to be so sheltered that she’s unprepared later in life.”

Anakin nodded, running his hands up and down your arms. “I know, my love. You’re right. It’s just hard for me to see her growing up, I don’t want her to get hurt. I’m her father, I’m supposed to protect her and I just- if this Han Solo idiot messes with her it’ll be my fault.” 

You cupped your husband’s cheeks in your hands. “Listen to me, Ani. You can’t protect everyone, especially not from their own decisions. You have to let her do this.”

Anakin, dramatic as always, groaned and threw his head back before finally meeting your gaze again and nodding. He put his hand on the small of your back, guiding you back to the living room where your daughter was anxiously waiting. Her head perked up as the two of you walked in.

“You can go, sweetheart.” You said, gently.

“Really?! Thank you!!” Leia ran up to you and hugged you. You squeezed her back. Even though you were less protective about dating than your husband didn’t mean that you liked the idea of her going out with some guy that had a rocky reputation, at best. 

Leia broke away from you and walked up to her father. “Thank you, Dad.”

Anakin hugged his daughter close. He would do anything for his family and loved all of you more than life. You smiled at the scene in front of you. Watching your husband interact with your children was one of your greatest joys. 

Hearing someone knock at the door, you all broke apart.

“Okay! Bye!” Leia said, moving to leave.

“Wait, wait, wait! We need to at least see this young man before your date!” Anakin said, moving to open the door.

As he saw Han leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed in a very cocky manner, it took every ounce of power he had to not slam the door in Han’s face. You smirked at your husband’s expression and moved to let Han inside. 

“Han!” Leia said as Han ran up to meet her.

“Hey, princess,” He said, picking her up and spinning her around. 

You looked up at your husband’s face, seeing his jaw ticking slightly. You laughed and gestured for him to lean down. “Okay but you have to admit, that was cute” You whispered in his ear.

Anakin let out a small huff but you could tell he agreed. He just put his arm around you and cleared his throat. “Home by 11, okay?”

“Home by midnight?” Leia asked hopefully.

“Fine, okay. Midnight, but not a minute later!” Anakin said. You chuckled. He was a sucker for her; he couldn’t say no and you all knew it. 

Han nodded at you and Anakin and Leia waved as they stepped outside, and then they were off. Anakin immediately bolted over to the balcony, craning his head.

“Anakin what the hell are you doing?”

“Shh! I’m trying to see which way they’re going so I know which route to take.”

“Which route to take?”

“Yeah! When I go follow them.” He said, as if it was the most normal thing ever.

“Anakin!”

“What?”

“You can’t go follow them!”

“Like hell I can’t!”

“Anakin Skywalker if you ruin this date for our daughter I will divorce you faster than you can say ‘lightsaber’” 

“But Y/N-” 

You cut him off, laughing slightly as he pouted at you. “No! Love, come on inside, let’s have dinner and watch something on the holoprojector while we wait for her to get back, okay?”

Anakin sighed, nodding in agreement. You shook your head, smiling as you took his arm and walked back inside. Instead of moving to the kitchen, Ani plopped both of you on the couch, taking a moment to just think about how lucky he was.

“Thank you for caring about our family, Ani” You said softly, breaking the silence.

“Always, angel. You really think it’ll go well?”

You thought for a moment. “Maybe. And if not, that’s not something we can control. Now can we please go eat before you come up with another crazy idea, like dressing Ahsoka up in a disguise to go and pretend to be their waitress?”

“Now that you mention it, that’s actually-”

You shut him up with a kiss. Anakin gently bit your bottom lip, asking for access which you happily granted. He shifted you so you were sitting atop his lap, your thighs straddling his hips. His tongue slowly entered your mouth and you moaned softly at the feeling. You were completely entranced by him and loved every moment of it. 

“How did I get so damn lucky?” he asked as you broke away. 

“I’m not sure. But I am pretty special, aren’t I?” You smirk.

He looked at you with adoration. “Yeah, you are.”

The two of you spend the night eating food and end up curled back on the couch, enjoying each other’s company and the cool breeze. Finally, the doorbell rings and your heads perk up.

You were surprised to see Han still with Leia, not expecting him to walk her to the door. The two of them were smiling at each other and you couldn’t help but smile back. From the corner of your eye, you saw Anakin’s lips were curling up, too. At the end of the day, all you wanted as parents was for your children to be happy. 

“Goodnight, princess.” Han said.

“Goodnight, scoundrel!” Leia shot back at him, turning away to walk inside. 

You waved goodbye to Han before slowly shutting the door and looking at your daughter. 

“So you’re dating scoundrels now?” You said, eyebrows quirked.

Leia rolled her eyes. “Proudly.” 

You laughed. She definitely picked up the sarcasm from her parents. 

“Did you have fun?” Anakin asked.

“What, no third-degree?”

“What, would you like an interrogation?”

“Nope! Thanks!” Leia said quickly. “It was… it was good. I have a feeling about him. It was exciting, you know?”

You smiled, thinking back to one of your first dates with Anakin. He took you out on his speeder and you swore you were going to die. Even so, it was the most alive you’d felt in a long time and you knew that if someone could give you that feeling, they were a person you needed to get to know more. “Yeah, I know, sweetheart. I’m glad you had such a good time! Now, get ready for bed, okay? It’s already pretty late.”

“Okay, okay,” Leia said, still pretty giddy from the evening. As she disappeared to her room, you turned back to your husband.  

“That went pretty well, don’t you think?” Your tone was light, teasing. 

Anakin nodded. “Alright, yeah, don’t go gloating about it too much.”

You laughed. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

-----

the link to join my taglist is in my pinned! if your username is crossed out, that means that for some reason i couldn’t tag you. please dm me if you would like to be taken off <3

permenant tags:

@saltybreaddream @buckysbeloved @lolquarth

anakin tags:

@anakinswhore @kennedywxlsh @coldlilheart @adamgetawaydriver @chokemeanakin @gayidioot @starwars-whore @katelynnwrites @haydens-moles @serpntines @anakinlove @rowley-with-ackerman @dexthtoyounglings @babykinskywalker @cluelessgurl @april-showers-and-flowers @astxrias @beiroviski @captainshazamerica @alyssa-skywalker 

[bebepac]

Seeing Double

This is chapter 7 of Just the Way You Are.  To catch up on what you’ve missed please click:  Just the Way You Are Masterlist

Original Post date: 2/24/2021

The Book:  Prerfect Match x TRR

Pairing:  Hayden and Kai /  TRR MC is single-ish

Word Count: 3192

Warnings:  Profanity

Summary: More of Hayden and Liam’s friendship is revealed.  Liam and Riley have breakfast together for the first time... alone.  The squad goes out to dinner.  

Taylor, Sal, Jaiden, and Nico are my own characters.  All others belong to Pixelberry.  

A/N: Working on giving my masterlist a face lift, here’s one of fruits of my labor.  I hope you like it.    I really don’t have a song for this one, so i’m not even going to bother picking one.  

A/2:  In this AU Jaiden is not the older brother, he is the younger brother.  Jason and Ren Brooks after failing to conceive adopted twin girls and seven years later.  Jaiden arrived!

“You have an identical twin sister?”  

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you mention that?”  

“She’s my sister, and we share the same face.  That's it. Do you mention your sibling that doesn’t?”  

“No.. but…”

“People get so drawn into the fact that we look alike, that they don’t realize that we’re still  completely different people with different personalities.  Yes we share a face… but that’s where the similarities end. People really start asking ten thousand questions when you say, you have an identical twin."

Riley laughed in her direction.

"Being that she's giving you the finger right now, looks like the two of you really hit it off. Come on let's smooth this over. I promise her bark is worse than her bite."

Riley grabbed his hand pulling him over to meet her sister. All Liam could think is that Riley was holding his hand.

Taylor immediately rolled her eyes.

"C’mon Tay be nice.”

“Why? He has corny jokes Riley. My God!!! They’re horrible.”

“You’re just a comedy snob because Max is a comedian.”  

She smirked at Riley. Riley smirked back identically.

“Liam is a nice guy Taylor, if you give him a chance. I gave Maxwell a chance.”  

“I’m engaged to Maxwell. Are you trying to get engaged to him Riley?”

Liam let out a surprised cough.

“In case you don’t speak in cough, that means no Ri.”

“That means, we just started hanging out and you’re trying to throw us down the aisle Taylor, overbearing much?”    

Riley raised her eyebrow, crossing her arms over her arms over her chest.  Riley tapped her foot impatiently.  

“Finnnnneeeeeee!!!!  You win.  Okay, You win.  Don’t do that thing like Mom does it drives me crazy."

Taylor took a sip of her coffee like she was taking a shot and then smiled sweetly at Liam.

"Hi Liam, I'm Taylor, Riley's sister. Nice to meet you."

Liam was impressed.

"That's all I ask. Thank you Taylor."

She saluted Riley. "Okay Mom."

"Come on Liam." She grabbed his hand again pulling him away from her.

They went to sit at a table away from Taylor. Liam was  relieved. Though he thought Riley had the situation handled with her sister.

"Sorry I am late. Chance told me at the last second, he couldn't make it then I had to throw something on."

Riley smiled, so did Liam.

He glanced at Riley. If this was her just throwing clothes on, his heart ached to see what she looked like when really tried to look nice.

Riley looked amazing. Her hair and makeup were done. She was wearing a blue retro dress with pink flamingos on it, and her signature pink flip flops.  Riley looked beautiful.

"Well if you rushed, Riley, I can't tell. I think you look beautiful."

Riley smiled biting her lip and her cheeks turned pink. She glanced down at the menu.

Riley was blushing!

"You make sure you let Chance know, I'm sad I couldn't hang out with him today. But I'm glad you're here Riley."

They ordered their food. Another Greek omelet for Riley. Liam ordered a different breakfast sampler.

When the food came he noticed as he ate Riley kept glancing at his plate.  

“Want to try some?”  Liam asked.  

“No.. I’m fine.”  Riley said hesitantly.  They continued talking.  It almost felt like a date to Liam.  

When he glanced up, Riley was eyeing his plate again.

“Riley, you're giving my food the look of lust.”  He slid his plate over to Riley.  

“Well if you insist.”   She said, taking a forkful of  eggs, chopped potatoes, cheese, and sausage breakfast casserole.

“That is soooo good.”

“Maybe you should get it the next time you have breakfast here….with me…”  

“I’d like that.”  Riley’s cheeks turned a darker shade of pink.  “Us to have breakfast again, and the breakfast casserole is a good idea too.”

“Alright.”  Liam’s smile brightened even more.  

Taylor watched her sister.  She hadn’t seen someone make Riley smile like that in a long time.   Maybe she was finally trying to let someone in.   Taylor was going to give this Liam guy a chance, if he could make her smile like that.  She hadn’t seen her smile that much since Nico.  

“See you at work sis.  See you around Liam.”  

“It’s been interesting meeting you Taylor.”  

Taylor smiled.  “You know what,  I like him a little more now.  He’s honest.”  

Hayden poured a cup of coffee.  Hayden didn’t dislike anything.  But he found that there were some flavorings he added to his coffee he enjoyed more than others.  

“Hey Hayden!”

“What’s up Liam?”

“Nothing much, how are you?”

“I’m really good.”  

Liam put his lunch bag in the fridge.

“I just want to thank you.”  

“For what?”  Hayden asked.

“For setting me up with Riley.  It might not go anywhere, but I feel like I have a chance.  We might have a chance. And I really like being around her.”  

“I thought you two would be a good match for each other.  You two have the same look in your eyes.  The one you try to hide.”  

“And what look is that Hayden?”  

“Pain.  I think the two of you could help each other heal.”  

“You can see that in the both of us?”  

“You don’t have to tell me about what happened to you Liam.  Or you can, when you feel like you’re ready to.  Just know you have a friend if you ever need to talk.”

Liam was humbled by Hayden's words. Regardless of what Hayden was or wasn't,  Liam knew one thing. Hayden is a true friend. No one could convince him otherwise.

"Thank you Hayden."

Liam had heard horror stories about the matches.  Especially the one that tried to kill the president.  People that knew what Hayden was, stayed away from him in the office.  Others were intrigued.  All still kept their distance.

Hayden was alone at work a lot, until Liam decided to sit with him one day at lunch.

“Mind if I sit with you?”  Liam asked that day.

“Sure, I guess my days of hoarding seats are now over.”

Both Hayden and Liam laughed.

Liam liked Hayden immediately.  They talked about everything. Hayden finally asked the question that was on his mind.

“Why did you sit with me?”  

“You looked like you needed a friend.  I need one too.”  

“Jai, do you have your wallet?”  

“Riley you’re worse than Mom.”  

“Well if you want to have a drink, they’re going to card you.  No one will believe my baby faced brother is twenty one without seeing your license.”

She pinched Jaiden's cheek.

"God you are Mom!!!!"

"And don’t be afraid to talk, Jai.  You cared about him too.”  

“Okay Riley.”  

When they arrived at The Ruby Apple, they were the first to arrive.

“Sal, can we get our usual booth?”  

“Sure sweetheart, it only seems like yesterday was the last time all you all were here together.”

Riley slid into the booth  glancing at all the pictures on the wall.  The Ruby Apple had been one of Nico’s favorite places, and their group of friends were regulars there.  They had their own booth.  And there it was, a picture of the group together celebrating Nico’s birthday, the last one he had with the group.   Nico had put on two birthday hats on his chest, and looked like Madonna when she wore that  cone bra in her music video.

  He was sticking his chest into Riley’s face, and everyone was laughing.  Everyone filed in, that was in town.  Drake, Max, Taylor, Liv, Bert, Savannah, and Kai.

“Where’s Hayden?”  

“He decided he would stay in tonight.”  

"He knew he was welcome right?"

"Oh of course Ri, he knew."

“Sal, can we…..”

“Loaded nachos for the table and your first round?”  

“Yes.”  

“Let me see Super Boy’s id.”  

Taylor laughed.  “That’s funny.”  

Jaiden handed over his driver’s license.  

“I’ll have my waitress bring your stuff over."

A few minutes later a young woman walked over to the table.  Jaiden sat up straight.

Riley raised an eyebrow.  

“Mia!!”  Kai screeched.  “What are you doing here?”

“Working, I pull some shifts here when we’re not on the food truck to make a little extra money.”

Jaiden kept staring at her.  She smiled at him.   She passed out the shots.  It was Nico’s favorite.  Baby Guinness.

“It looks like I have one extra.  I’m sorry, I’ll take it back.”  

“No leave it.  There was supposed to be one more.”  Riley said with a sad look in her eyes.  

Mia left the shot.  “I’ll be back in a few with your loaded nachos for the table.”

“Let’s do this.”  Drake commented. “Everyone hold your glasses up.  Only for you would I drink this weak ass shot for, because you know I’m a whiskey man.  And because of that, I know you are smiling down on all of us.  We fuckin’ miss you, and love you Nico KH. Cheers.”

Everyone clinked glasses and  downed their drinks.

“That’s not weak!”  Jaiden coughed.  

“Says the twenty-one year old that’s had more cough syrup in his life, than actual liquor.”

“Taylor God! He’s your brother, why do you have to be so ruthless?”  Bert laughed.

“You act like you just met me.  You  know this about me. My sensor is perpetually broken.”

She slid by Jaiden.  “I’ll be right back.”

Sal stopped her.

"Riley, I'm so sorry about the number of shots, I wasn't thinking."

"It's alright Sal."

Riley went into the bathroom to compose herself a little bit.  She wiped her eyes and touched up her makeup.  She felt it a victory she hadn't cried today. She sighed walking out of the bathroom when she saw him.

Liam was sitting in a booth alone, reading a book. Not a kindle, an actual book.  Riley smiled. She didn't know why she found it so endearing that he was reading an actual book, and chuckling to himself.

"Liam?"

He looked up at her.

"Hey!"

"What are you reading?"

"It's called The Greek Meet. It's absolutely hilarious."

"Isn't that a movie?"

"It is, but oftentimes the books are always better than the movie versions. The author was consulted on this one, it's pretty close to the book."

"Good deal! Are you alone Liam?"

"Yeah, but I'm fine Riley." He smiled at her.

"Liam…."

"I'm used to it." He reassured her.

His words stung Riley's heart.

"What happened to you Liam?"

"I was sick a lot as a kid.  I spent a lot of time alone in a hospital room."

"Come sit with us Liam."

He shook his head no.

"It's okay Riley. I'm fine really."

"Please?"

He glanced up at her.

"If you insist."

Liam followed Riley over to the big booth full of people.

"Who's this clown?"  Drake asked.

"Drake don't be a Taylor."

Everyone at the table laughed at Jaiden's comment.

"I resent that. And from all people, my little brother. Really Jai?"

"It's what we do. Broken sensors and sarcasm is a love language we're sure."

Drake and Taylor  high fived each other.

Riley introduced Liam to the table as her friend.  He sat next to Riley and across from Kai.

Mia showed up with another round of drinks.

"This one is on Sal! Hey about time you showed up! You missed the first round.  Just in time for the second."

"Excuse me?" Liam looked confused.

Mia passed out the shots.

"You said there was supposed to be one more. This is him right?"

Oh God. Liam thought as he looked at Riley. They were here for Nico.

Riley stammered.  No one knew what to say.

Riley's face fell.

"Yeah! I'm always late. You know me." Liam said with a smile at Riley.

"Great! I'll be back with your Nachos."

Drake gave Liam a nod of approval.  He had earned respect at the table.

"Come on then let's do this before the damn alcohol evaporates. You too Liam."

Everyone held up their drinks.

“You know we got more people in this booth this year without your big ass head in the way?  We still miss you though. Happy birthday in heaven.”  

Everyone drank their shots.

“Softie, your emotions… “  Maxwell nudged Taylor.

“I am NOT SOFT!!!”  You know this about me Max."

“So how was it?”

“Not terrible. Actually, I liked it.”  

Mia came back with the huge plates of Nachos.

“Yasssssssssssss!!!” Maxwell screamed.

Riley looked at Liam.  “Thanks.” she whispered to him.  

He winked at her.  “No problem.”  

Mia refilled the waters on the table.  

“Can I get a coke?”  Jaiden blushed at Mia.

“Sure sweetie, I got ya.”  

“Somebody’s got a crush on the cute waitress.”  

“She’s nineteen.”  

“How do you know that Kai?”  Riley asked.

“She runs my favorite food truck with her dad.  You saw the cute shirts.  Pops on the Go.  That’s Pop’s daughter Mia.”  

“She’s even made her uniform a little spunky.  She stands out from all the other waitresses.

“And not to mention her pink chuck taylors.”  

“Her what?”  Jaiden asked.

“Jaiden her shoes.”  

“They’re converse.”  

“You’re so young. But you know what we’re going to help you.  We’re feeling inspired.  I feel like Nico would help you out. Nico KH was a great wingman. We’re going to be your wing people tonight.”  

“Kai you’re up.”   Drake said.

“Here’s your coke.”   . “Thank you.”  Jaiden’s cheeks were bright red.

“Hey Mia?”  

“Yeah Kai?”

“Between Pops and here, how in the world do you have time for a social life?”

Mia laughed.  “What social life?  The most social I am right now, has media behind it, or talking to my customers.”  

“You mean to tell me as adorable as you are, you’re not seeing anyone currently?”  

“No, not right now.”  

Kai glanced at Jaiden and winked.  

“Can I get you guy’s dinner orders going?”

She paused.  Jaiden was just staring at her in awe saying nothing.  

Riley hit him.  “Jai, she wants your food order!!!”

“OH!!! Can you come back to me, I’m not sure yet.”  

Taylor made the sound of someone crashing and burning.

“You���re going to hell Taylor.” Drake said.

“With the way you drink whiskey, Drake, you're gonna be there first. You can save me a seat in the lake of fire.”  

By the time it was Jaiden’s turn to order he still looked indecisive.

“What’s your favorite thing on the menu?”

“My favorite is the tofu burger with carrot fries.”  

Drake made vomit sounds.

“Seriously?”  Jaiden asked.  Yeah he wasn’t going to attempt that one for a girl.

“Um no.  Get the Monster bacon burger with loaded fries.”  

“That sounds really good.”  

They enjoyed their dinner.

Mia passed out all the checks.

Riley grabbed Jaiden’s.  

“I owe you dinner.”  

She took his.  She smiled when she opened it.  

“You might want this though.”  

On a little separate piece of paper was Mia’s phone number.  

Jaiden smiled when he looked at the digits written on the piece of paper.  

He picked up his phone.

Drake snatched the paper away.

“Don’t you text her yet!!!!!!”

“Don’t play games with her.”  Savannah  said.  All the women at the table nodded.

“He’s not supposed to text right away. Makes him look over eager.”  

“Um he is eager.  Let’s be real.”  

“Are you staying with me tonight Jai?”

“Do you mind?”  

“Nope, you’re a little wobbly, you’re coming home with me.”

“If that isn’t the pot calling the kettle black.  You too Riley.”  

“I can walk you guys back if you want.”  

“Thank you Liam that would be great.”

Liam waited for Riley and Jaiden outside.  

Drake approached him.

“You know that was really nice what you did for her earlier in there.  None of us knew what to say without hurting her.”  

“Not a big deal,  I was only trying to help make an awkward situation… less awkward you know?”

“Riley is like a sister to me.  She’s been through a lot.  If you break her heart, I will break your face. Am I clear?”  

Liam swallowed thickly.  “Crystal.”  

Drake slapped Liam on the back when Riley came up.

"Nice seeing you Liam. Remember what I said!"

Liam, Riley, and Jaiden started walking to Riley's apartment in silence.

"My feet hurt." Riley grumbled.

"C'mon Ri."

Jaiden crouched in front of her.

She hopped onto his back.  After a few blocks Jaiden’s pace really slowed.

Jaiden grumbled. "I'm not going to make it."

He put Riley down on a park bench.

"My feet still hurt.”

"Do you trust me?" Liam inquired.

"Within reason, why?"

"This is why."

Liam effortlessly picked Riley up carrying her over the threshold.

Riley wrapped her arms around Liam's neck.

"I feel like a princess." Riley giggled still a little tipsy.

"No Riley, you're a Queen."

"Queen Riley. That's pretty nice."

Riley rested her head on Liam's chest, hearing his heart beat steady in his chest. It lulled Riley right to sleep.

Liam tried to pass some knowledge on to Riley’s younger brother.

"You know Jaiden, I agree with the ladies about Mia. If you want to get to know her better, text her. Don't wait. She seems like a really sweet girl."

"Is Riley snoring?"

Liam glanced down at Riley again. Her head was nestled right next to his heart.

"She's out like a light."

"You like my sister don't you?"

"What's not to like? She's amazing!"

"Riley is not going to forget him, Liam."

"I'm not asking her to. I'm just hoping she will open her heart to me."

"It's the same thing."

"It isn't. I know I can't replace him. There is a part of her heart that will always be his because of the way she lost him. I'm not asking her for that. I don't want that part of her. What I do want is the chance to make her happy, her to give me a chance to. And we could find a happy place together, her and I ."

He glanced at Riley. She snorted, waking herself up. Jaiden was laughing, Liam was trying hard not to. He just thought she was so damn cute.

"Was I snoring?"

"No, not at all Riley, you just breathe heavy."

"Where's your key? We're at your place."

Liam put Riley down at her door. Riley fished in her purse for her keys.

“Want to say hi to your buddy?”  Riley asked.  

Hell ya I do!”

Chance ran up to Liam once they got inside the apartment.

“He really likes you a lot.”  

“Yeah no one else matters when Liam is around.  Don’t forget who feeds you every day twice a day Chance.”  

“I think it’s forgotten.”  Liam chuckled.  

Liam saw Jaiden get excited as he looked at his phone.

"Mia just texted me back!"

"I'm so glad you didn't listen to Drake."

"Yeah I listened to Liam."

"What about your sisters or all the other women at the table."

"I am the great and powerful Li. Wise beyond his years. " he said with a wink.

Riley rolled her eyes.

The next morning Riley woke up with a headache.  

“Ri! Where’s your sugar?”  Jaiden called through the door.  

“In the sugar bowl on the table.”

Riley groaned grabbing her head.

“Ugh.. Baby Guinness, you are not my friend.”  

Riley settled back into bed and closed her eyes.  She heard a soft mumble and the bed settled next to her.  

Riley opened her eyes.  She rolled over finding Liam sleeping in the bed next to her shirtless.  

What the Fuck.

@dcbbw​​    @queenjilian​​       @jessiembruno​​       @bbrandy2002​​       @khoicesbyk​​      @janezillow​​     @sillypapermango​​      @gkittylove99​​ @gabesmommie1130​​      @mom2000aggie​​      @lovablegranny​​      @jared2612​​

@shewillreadyou​      @zoehanji​        @queenwalton​     @mrsdrakewalkerblog​       @hopefulmoonobject​     @hopelessromanticmonie​      @kingliamandriley​      @batgirlassociationofgothamcity​    @iaminlovewithtrr      @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful​​       @ladyangel70​​      @twinkleallnight​​      @kat-tia801​​       @caseyvalentineramsey​​     @thequeenchoices​​     @yourmajesty09​​      @amandablink​​      @secretaryunpaid​​   @sfb123​​      @neotericthemis​​    @royalromancer​​      @sweatyrysconnoisseur​​ @nala-raines​

[thorne93]

History Repeats (Part 14)

Prompt: Life’s hard, right? Well throw in a not so great job, a broken heart, and chasing a pipe dream in LA. But could someone come along to make all the bad shit disappear? Or is he just another heartbreak waiting around the bend?

Warnings: language, drug addiction, alcohol addiction, angst/heartbreak, adult themes (??)

Word Count: 2525

Note: Aesthetic made by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo because she’s absolutely amazing Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo . Brainstorming from @carryonmyswansong​

**Song Inspiration: I Almost Do by Taylor Swift; 3AM by Halsey; When The Party’s Over by Billie Eilish

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you woke up, you felt like shit, and not because of the drugs and alcohol that only recently vacated your system. You groaned, squeezing your eyes shut. Did you really kick Hayden out? Were you honestly that far gone? 

Yeah, he broke your heart. He wasn’t the first asshole to do it, but he did stick around. Maybe that was because he had to though.

No, you knew better. He had enough money to stay at a hotel, but he stayed with you. He cared about you. It just hurt so bad to not have him any more. You hadn’t said you loved him, not yet, but you did, you loved him with everything you had and he just… broke everything. 

 Maybe you should go apologize.

Pulling yourself out of bed, you slipped on a comfortable shirt and yoga pants before you trodded out to the guest room, Hayden’s room. You knocked on the door before poking your head in. 

Only, there was nothing there. All of his things gone. His suitcases absent. No note, no letter, not even a post-it note. 

A choked sob escaped you. You knew you kicked him out, but you gave him until the next night. He was already gone?

So much for staying. So much for caring. 

No text, no call, no letter. It seemed as if he truly did want to be gone from you. 

Fine. If that’s the way he wanted it… Wish granted. 

------------------------

Months went by and you tried to forget him, tried to turn your pain into art.

Trey worked hard to get your EP ready. You had several tracks that you wanted to feature and he did enjoy your lyrics and tune. He was happy to work with you and the other members of your band to get the sound you wanted. 

By the time the singles were released, you were already becoming a hit. You hit all of the media platforms and your work exploded, sending you soaring to the charts. You weren’t quite topping them yet, but you were definitely being demanded on the radio and your Youtube and Spotify numbers were great, rising all the time. 

As time went on though, your addiction only grew. With Hayden out of your life, the glaring reminders that you lost all your old friends, and none of your old boyfriends seemed to ever love you, there was nothing to stop you from becoming nearly dependent on the drugs and alcohol. 

You’d never been like this in your life, but you’d never been at such an odd time in your life either. On every romantic and personal front, your life was a total flop, a zero sum. But your career, your dream job was finally taking off. The world was your oyster, you were rubbing shoulders with musical big wigs, meeting huge names and musicisinas. 

Between the complete amazement you were in from being discovered and having your heart broken for the last time, you were a mental mess. 

Hayden wasn’t just another guy. Jason was just another guy, just like every ex before him. 

But Hayden, he was different. When you and Jason split up, it wasn’t the man you mourned, but the death of yet another relationship. With Hayden, you missed him, not being together. You missed the light he brought to your life. You missed the way he supported you. You missed the way you two could joke about movies together. You missed how you could act completely goofy and silly and he joined in. 

You loved him, you were in love with him, and he pulled the rug out from under you.

That was why your habit of using coke was slowly getting worse. You managed to keep your job, for a while, keep the desires away. Then you started to get where you were barely sober for that too and just when your boss mentioned it, you decided it was time to leave anyway. You put in your two weeks and left gracefully.

As soon as you were no longer tied to the hotel, Trey put you in every lounge, venue, and club he could find. You were singing all of your songs on your EP. Every night you did a show, you got off the stage, got drunk or high, or both, and then you crashed. 

Same routine, every night. 

Anything to numb the pain of losing Hayden, of feeling like your life was in shambles. It wasn’t just losing Hayden, it was realizing you had no close friends, no one else to lean on. He’d become your best friend, your confidant, your lover. He was everything you ever wanted or needed, and he was gone. 

Neither of you had sent any messages to each other. It killed you, but you had to move forward, if that’s what you could call drowning your sorrows in a bottle or a baggie. 

Tonight, you just got done singing a set and you were hanging out with Darren, Veronica, Brad, and Tai. Unbeknownst to you, Hayden was actually about to make a stop by this bar. He had some contacts in your circle, a few people he knew in the music world that he asked to keep an eye on you, and if you got too out of control or needed help, they should let him know. He also watched your Instagram and Twitter, keeping an eye on your partying that way.

He’d gotten a few texts before about you, just an update on how you were, but tonight was a red alert from a guy that was somewhat in your circle. He watched you as you did a bump of coke, drink whatever was passed to you, and you were all over everyone in the bar. It was a sloppy mix of drunk-high. You held onto everyone, laughing, trying to crawl on the bar, making a complete ass of yourself. 

Typically your antics were cheered on because everyone in your scene was pretty wild, but even tonight some of them were worried about how you were acting. 

Hayden made his way downtown as soon as he got the text, looking for the bar. Finally, as he walked by, he saw you through the window. You were laughing, throwing your head back, hanging on other people, and trying to dance. 

You were a mess, and that was obvious. 

He pressed his lips into a thin line before going into the bar. He made his way over to you. He wanted to say he felt relief when he saw you, but he didn’t. He just felt worse. He wasn’t an idiot about your drug abuse, he also wasn’t stupid to see what had triggered it. He just thought it was stupid for you to get mixed up in this shit over him. He wasn’t worth it. 

He could see how it was affecting you. Dark circles painted your eyes, your clothes hung loosely on your body, you looked as if you were awake solely from the drugs. He hated how bad you looked.

“Hey,” he greeted loudly over the bar music and patrons. 

You looked over and saw him, your eyes going in and out of focus. “Oh my god, it’s you! Hey! Stay! Have a drink!” you encouraged as you fell all over him, putting your arms around him. In your current state, none of the pain that would’ve normally come from seeing him happened. 

“Hey, no, I’m good. This isn’t really my scene. Y/N, you seem really far gone, do you want me to take you home?” 

You pushed away from him, frowning. “What? No, why would I want that?” You reached in your purse and grabbed something, about to put it in your mouth. “I’m having a good time here, Hayden. You should try it,’ you urged giddily.

“Are you fucking crazy?” he demanded as he slapped the little white thing out of your hand. “Was that fucking E? On top of what you already have in your system?”

“The fuck is your problem?” you ordered, angry.

“My problem is you destroying your life and your body,” he informed.  “I’m taking you home,” he stated firmly. He started to turn you around and push you outside. Everyone started to look your way. 

“No, you aren’t!” you protested loudly, moving wildly, but he just persisted. He went around in front of you, grabbed your wrist, and tugged you outside and started walking you down the sidewalk until you got yourself free of his hold. “Jesus! What the fuck is your deal? Those are my friends. I’m having a good time!” 

“A good time?” he demanded, his voice reigned in anger. “You think this is a good time? You’re out of your fucking mind.” 

“Hey, Mr. Entertainment Business newsflash,a  party-girl image is great publicity. Trey encourages this so long as I’m fine to record.”

“Oh, I’m so glad to hear that your producer endorses you getting high and drunk, as long as you’re off the clock.” 

“You aren’t my handler, you’re not my parents, yo’re not my baby sitter, so just fuck off.”

He stared at you, clenching his jaw. “If you want to stay here and become like---If you want to stay here and party, that’s fine, but I’m done. I’m done with this. I’m done watching you ruin your life and throw so much potential away. I’m not gonna stick around to watch you drive your self into rock bottom when I’ve tried like hell to get you to wake the fuck up.”

“You didn’t stick around! Newsflash, asshole! You left! You left me high and dry.” 

“You kicked me out!” he reminded. “After I tried to approach you about your addiction. And I did stick around, you just didn’t know it.” 

“You didn’t approach me about it, you attacked me about it. Besides, what the hell do you mean you’re not going to stick around or watch me? You haven’t been around.” 

Letting out a sigh, he ran his hand down his face. “When I left, I may have asked some friends to keep an eye on you. I told them to update me if you were getting worse or better.”

“You were spying on me?” you asked, gasping.

“No, I just had people keeping an eye on you. If they were at the same party or something, they’d just let me know how you were doing.”

“Oh, nice to know you cared so much,” you retorted, rolling your eyes. You were getting more and more sober with the fresh air and the anger.  

“I do care. I think I’m the only one you know who does’ fucking care about you. I’m the only one not letting you just become an addict. I’m fighting for you.”

“Oh, is that what you were doing when you broke up with me? Fighting for me?”

He glared at you. He didn’t want to have this conversation. “Yes, I was. I was trying to make sure we were making the right choice.”

“Oh, spare me the bullshit!” you shouted, your head falling back. “I’m sick of this. I’m sick of the lies. Just be honest with me. You didn’t care about me, you didn’t love me, you wanted a rebound. You weren’t worried about the both of us. You’re just like everyone else. You wanted something to distract you from your ex leaving you and I was the perfect replacement. Then when you got bored, you cast me aside.” 

“You weren’t a replacement! You weren’t my rebound,” he yelled. 

“Then what was it?!” you screamed. “Because from where I stood, you and I were perfect, more than perfect. We could spend time with each other, lean on each other, support each other, we lived together, I met your child, we had date nights all the time and all of that just -- you ended it. Without warning. We didn’t even talk about it. You didn’t even ask me how I was feeling, if I cared about you. You just decided for the both of us that it would be better if this wasn’t a rebound. But it wasn’t ever about that. It was about me taking putting someone else before me like I always do, and I’m the one who got fucking hurt, not you.”

He shook his head. “I’m sorry that you got hurt. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It hurt me too. And it hurts like hell to watch you do this to yourself. You think I liked watching you come home high and drunk all the time?” 

“I don’t imagine it bothered you too much. We weren’t dating any more.” 

He shrugged. “So? Just because I’m not dating you, it doesn’t mean I don’t give a shit about you.”

“See, in my world, it does. You don’t break someone’s fucking heart then try to tell them you still care. You’re the one who decided to date me. I asked, you shot me down. Then, when I was really happy, when I thought this was real, that we had a shot, that this was something that would last and you just ripped it away. No conversation.” 

He shook his head. “Yeah, and I’m sorry for that. I am. I should’ve talked to you, but is this really what you want? You want to be so numb and fucked up on drugs you can’t function?”

“I can function just fine, thanks for checking in!”

“I can’t believe you’re fine with this. You’ve been so strong since I met you. Going after your dream, working hard at your job, you never would’ve given into this bullshit, despite what happened between us.” 

“Yeah, well shit changes. Clearly you know that.”

“Nothing changed. I cared for you then, and I do now.” 

You scoffed. “Spare me, alright? It was clear to me after you left you never gave a shit. I licked your wounds so you could heal and then you left me. Fuck off. You don’t get the right to tell me where I can hang out, what I can do, or when I can do it.” You got in his face, your voice low before you turned around to head back inside. 

He stood there more upset than he had been when you two first broke up. He wasn’t sure what he thought he would gain from coming out tonight. He just thought he could save you from yourself. He knew he was the reason you went on the downward spiral but he didn’t know how to fix it. 

He bit his lip to keep from crying as he watched you rejoin your friends and pick up a shot glass and knock it back. He shook his head as he turned to walk down the street.

He couldn’t keep doing this to himself, or to you. He needed to move on. He couldn’t watch you suffer any more. He had tried to help you. Every time he did though, you turned him down - hard. 

With his heart heavy, he took a taxi back to his new hotel and tried to forget all about you.

If only it were that easy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Forever Tag:

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@magpiegirl80​

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@marvel-imagines-yes-please​​

@missinstantgratification​​

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Hayden Christensen:

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History Repeats:

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[littlemaatta]

Santa Scheme - Derek Hale x Reader

@iamabeautifulperson18 said: Secret Santa with the pack and you propose to Derek cause he is bad at feelings. 

a/n: wow i really went OFF with this one. it’s not very Derek-centric till the end, lots of pack interactions and stuff but i hope you like it :))) and yes I am posting a christmas story in july. 

sort of like end of season 5 pack plus derek.

warnings: NONE. lots of fluff, i don’t even think i swore in this.

reader is described as: slightly shorter than derek, only mentioned once or twice. no other size, skin, or hair descriptors. i think it’s gender neutral as well? 

Lydia had gone out of her way to organize a pack Christmas party this year. She got Derek to let her decorate the loft, even going as far as renting more furniture for the sparsely furnished living space. 

She brought in a tree, garlands and lights to hang on the walls, and she even organized a Secret Santa. 

She approaches you one day with a small box in her hands and a smile on her face, “Pick your Secret Santa.” she says as she holds the box out to you.

You reach in and pull out a piece of paper. 

“Thank you.” Lydia says, about to turn around to go find Derek when you stop her.

“Are we allowed to have other presents, cause I was kind of planning something for the party...” you ask softly. 

Lydia gives you a knowing smile as she nods, “l’ll make an exception for you.”

__

“Yes, you have to participate.” Lydia says with a roll of her eyes as she holds out the box full of names for Stiles to pick from.

With a pout on his face, Stiles reaches into the box and pulls out a slip of paper. 

He unfolds it and reads the name before shoving the slip of paper into his pocket. 

Scott, Malia, and Lydia each take their turns next and then the box is empty, the younger and older members of the pack having already picked their names.

“Good, now everyone has picked their Secret Santa and we can move on to who is bringing what to the party.” Lydia says with a satisfied smile.

Stiles groans and is answered with an elbow in the ribs from Scott. 

They each volunteer an item or dish and Lydia walks away happily. 

__

You got your Secret Santa present and your other surprise purchased well ahead of time, knowing that the stores would of course be crazy the closer it got to Christmas time. But you ended up at the store the day before Christmas Eve despite your best efforts not to. 

And to your not-so-surprise you ran into a few members of the pack doing their last minute Secret Santa preparations.

The next day, you grab your nicely wrapped present and the cookies you made and head to your boyfriend’s loft.

Derek is standing outside in the hallway when you arrive and you furrow your brows in confusion when you spot him leaned up against the wall. 

He looks up at your approach and smiles.

He pushes himself off the wall and leans down to wrap his arms around your waist and kiss you softly. 

“What are you doing out here?” you ask.

“Lydia kicked me out, she said my sour face was interfering with her decorating process.” he responds with a small smile.

You let out a laugh, knowing Lydia she will want everything to be perfect for this party and imagining her shooing Derek from his own loft so that she can decorate seems right on brand. 

The loft door opens a small crack, enough for Lydia to stick her head out to see you. 

“Good, you’re here.” she says with a large smile. “Give me your stuff.” she orders, opening the door a little more so she can reach out. 

“Hi Lydia, nice to see you too.” you answer, playfully sarcastic as you hand the redhead your present and food.

Lydia simply rolls her eyes and smiles in response, taking your things before shutting the loft door again.

You share a look with Derek and laugh as you move back to where he is leaning against the wall. You lean into his side as he wraps an arm around you.

You stay there as the rest of the pack arrives, Lydia coming out to take their things and not allowing any of them to peek inside until she is ready.

Finally, she opens the door, a wide smile on her face as she steps aside and gestures for you all to enter.

You and the rest of your pack are awed the moment you step inside Derek’s loft. 

The place has been transformed. Three large couches make a U shape in the center of the room, a table piled high with all of the Secret Santa gifts sits to the left of it. 

The large windows at the back of the room are trimmed with green pine garlands, with red poinsettias throughout. A large wreath hangs in the center. 

In front of the windows stands a magnificent tree, beautifully decorated and with a star on top. 

A long table covered with a red tablecloth sits to one side of the room, with a large variety of food including the dishes brought by some of the pack members. All of it nicely laid out, with plates and silverware stacked at one end. 

You turn to Lydia, your eyes displaying your shock at what she has managed to do to your boyfriend’s loft. 

“Lydia,” you breathe, eyes leaving her to roam around the loft once more, “This is amazing.” 

“You like it?” she asks, her question open to the entire pack.

A murmur of assent travels through the pack, some of them beginning to wander around the loft to admire the decorations.

Lydia claps her hands together and smiles, “Who’s hungry?”

__

After a delicious meal, full of laughter and fun, Lydia begins the Secret Santa. 

Everyone goes to grab the presents that they brought and then give them to their Secret Santa.

You give your present to Liam, Liam gives his to Stiles, Stiles gives his to Mason, Mason gives his to Hayden, Hayden gives hers to Malia, Malia gives hers to Derek, Derek gives his to Scott, Scott gives his to Lydia, and Lydia gives hers to you. 

Everyone begins opening their presents, gasps of excitement and ‘thank you’s fill the room.

The gift exchange shows you how much your pack members really know each other, and how much you all listen. There was, of course, a spending limit so that certain members of the pack wouldn’t be allowed to go overboard and spend exorbitant amounts on their gifts.

You got Liam a new bag for his lacrosse gear, knowing that he had accidentally ruined his old one, and you stuck a personalized t-shirt you had made for him inside.

Lydia, having heard you complaining about your wardrobe and not having time to shop for yourself, bought you some new clothes. Just a few items, though she would have liked to get more, all of them fitting your style perfectly while one or two may help you to change it up and step out of your comfort zone. Lydia being Lydia, you know that you can trust her to pick things that will look good on you. 

And you couldn’t be more grateful that she knew how helpful this gift would be for you.

Everyone is pleased with their gifts and the party continues as conversations carry throughout the group.

You sit next to Derek, with his arm wrapped around you and your head leaning against his shoulder. You join in a few of the various conversations, sharing laughs with your friends. 

When Derek gets up to go get another drink, you stand up too but head over to the window.

Your heartbeat picks up as you run your fingers over the ribbon wrapped around the small box in your hands.

Derek joins you at the window.

“Lydia really did a great job with this place, didn’t she?” he says softly. 

You smile and nod, glancing up at the decorations on the window again. You take a deep breath, deciding that now is the time to do this. 

“Derek.. I have something for you.”

He furrows his brows as he turns to face you, taking the small box from your hands and studying it, “I thought we were only doing the Secret Santa gifts, no extra ones.”

“Just open it.”

Derek can hear your heart racing, you know that. You also know he can probably tell how nervous you are from your chemo-signals. And you are mildly aware that you’ve caught the attention of the other supernaturals on the other side of the room, though Mason and Stiles are still kind of oblivious. 

You ignore these facts though, focusing only on Derek as he unties the ribbon on the box.

He lifts the lid off of the box to reveal a silver band. A ring. Simple and silver, but perfect for him.

He looks up at you, silently asking for you to explain what this is.

“Derek, I.. I know you’re not good at doing stuff like this, you told me on our first date that you’re not good at showing your feelings or doing romantic stuff, and that’s okay, because I love you. With my whole heart, I love you.

“I can’t imagine my future without you in it. So, will you marry me?”

Your heart is pounding in your chest and you know that Derek can hear it. You wonder if he could even hear what you were saying over the pounding of your heart. But when a huge smile takes over his face, you know he heard you. 

He closes the gap between you, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist and lifting you off the ground as he crashes his lips against yours.

“Yes.” he whispers as he pulls back, before kissing you one more time. 

The cheering of the pack behind you makes you pull away, Derek setting your feet on the ground again as you hide your face in his chest. 

You lean back eventually to look back up at Derek, both of you are still smiling widely despite your slight embarrassment as your friends continue to cheer and clap behind you.

[mischiefandi]

A Shitty Love Song (Part 1) - Stiles Stilinski

Wild Ones

A/N: hey everyone! this has been a long time coming! thank you for lovely comments on my previous post, im super happy to finally be posting this. a HUGE thank you to @duskholland​ for helping me out so much with this series, ily to death bitch. enjoyy yall

Summary: Y/N is a 17 year old girl who struggles in an epic battle against herself. Whether it is amor’s icy grasp or life’s unexpected course that forces her to finally open up, only one thing is certain. The truth cannot be long hidden.

Warnings: underage drinking, party times, maybe a couple of swear words but im not sure haha

Word Count: 5,3K

Pairing: Stiles Stilinski x Reader (Y/N)

Series Masterlist

(picture is not mine -> credits to @ pechka on unsplash)

Seasons before, in the early fall where the leaves don’t yet want to leave their wooden hooks, Y/N had just started her junior year of high school. Being the new girl in school, she was afraid of being alone - something she had always been - but not this year. Whether it was chance or fate, she happened to fall upon a curious but wonderful group of people who quickly became her friends.  

At its center, Scott McCall, young lacrosse player with a boyish charm and a heart of gold and by his side, Stiles Stilinski, an eccentric and spirited young man. Surrounding them were Lydia Martin, the fiery and confident genius, the sweet yet lethal huntress, Allison Argent, and finally Isaac Lahey, charming Mr Mischief himself.

This pack of wild cards had found a new companion, and Y/N fit in like a puzzle piece filling in its designated spot. She got along with everyone in the group, forming indestructible friendships with these eccentric teenagers, and she felt fortunate beyond belief. More often than not, she would eat with them by the walnut tree outside of the school. The group would share stories and food, complaining about the soporific lessons from the earlier period, or excitedly planning the next outing, the next party. Every week, the teenagers would go hang out in the woods by the mystical ruins of the Hale House, doing more of the same. Life was light and good.

The group had planned on hanging out by the Hale House one quiet September afternoon, but the universe likes to play tricks, and somehow Y/N and Stiles were the only ones to show up. Deeming it a happy accident, the pair walked through the damp woods together, talking about their day and slowly letting each other in. Laughter echoed between the trees and the wind turned.

🌙🌙🌙🌙🌙

A little more than a month had gone by and Halloween was just around the corner. Classes seemed longer than usual, bigger stacks of schoolwork forming daunting piles on Y/N’s desk. But school was the last thing she could think of when she got home after a long day of concentration. The only thing that mattered, was Stiles. Video calls, phone calls, and late night texts that seemed to never cease took over the second Y/N’s feet passed the threshold of her home. And nothing compared to these conversations.

“I’m sorry but no.”

“Stiles, stop, seriously.”

The mole-speckled boy lunged forward in front of the screen and passed a shaking hand through his spiky hair.

“There is no way you like the second trilogy better than the first one. It’s just not possible.”

“Well it is possible, because I do,” Y/N retorted, her unfazed expression gleaming back at him.

“Literally how? The group dynamic alone should make you see reason. I mean come on. Han and Leia? Han and Chewie? Han and Luke?”

“You do know Star Wars doesn’t exclusively revolve around Han Solo right?” she asked, her lips breaking into a smirk.

“First of all, no. Second, give me one single reason why the second trilogy is better than the first,” Stiles said, “I dare you.”

“One reason?”

The boy nodded, serious as a statue.

“Hayden Christensen.”

Stiles groaned deeply, his face buried in his large hands.

“Can’t even have a serious discussion about Star Wars with someone rational.”

“I’m not sorry.”

“You’re the worst.”

Y/N paused, holding a finger to her chin.

“Hmm, agree to disagree.”

“Son of a bitch.”

“Hey! How can we have an intelligent debate about anything if you use swearing as a last resort.”

“I have given up on us. It’s over.”

Y/N laughed profusely against her pillow, shaking her head.

“You’re a drama queen.”

“FRIENDSHIP OVER!” Stiles bellowed and Y/N shot her head back, unstoppable laughter erupting from her stomach.

“It’s going to make things awkward at the party, Friday,” Y/N said between chuckles, her laughter quieting down.

“Who said you were even invited,” replied Stiles, adjusting his shirt, revealing a tiny patch of skin just above his sweats. Y/N’s eyes flicked over to the screen but the second had passed.

“Funny. Listen, I gotta get some sleep otherwise I’ll pass out in math or something.”

“Yeah, I should probably also go to bed sometime soon.”

“Hopefully before tomorrow morning.”

“Har-har,” said Stiles, smiling at the camera, his chocolatey irises beaming at Y/N.

“Goodnight nerd.”

“Goodnight loser.”

Y/N stuck out her tongue at Stiles before hanging up the call.

That night, as she carefully brushed her teeth and got her clothes ready for the next day, Y/N thought back on her video call with Stiles, a warm smile spreading on her lips.

🌙🌙🌙🌙🌙

The week passed so slowly, each hour lasting an exhausting eternity. School, demanding as ever, while keeping Y/N busy, was the reason why time seemed so lengthy. The nasty side-effect from tantalizing hours is the amount of thinking you do to keep busy. So Y/N did just that. She thought about how much she cared for her group of friends, she thought about the fact that she had never felt like she belonged like she did then.

She thought about how nice it was sitting by the Hale House, enjoying each others’ company, how life is so much lighter when you feel surrounded, how much she had learned about herself after meeting the pack. She thought about the band Stiles and her liked so much. She thought about Star Wars. She thought about the sound her computer made when Stiles sent her a message. She thought of his hair, his moles, his neck. She thought about how thrilling it was when he sat next to her. She thought about how much he mattered in her life, just like the others mattered too.

Y/N did so much thinking that week. But the funny thing is, amor has a way of tricking your mind. Your body believes one thing but your mind has been bewitched, and no amount of thinking you do can remove the fog clouding over your eyes. 

When came Friday, Y/N was happy to be done with school, bursting through the doors of the establishment, excited to go home and get ready for Danny’s Blackout Party. She was thrilled about going, however nervous she felt. 

She had never been to a party like Danny’s rave before and she had no idea what to expect. But more importantly, she was afraid of crowds. She had tried going out to packed bars with people from her old school, but the chaos and the drunks surrounding her made her feel beyond uneasy. 

“Y/N! Wait up!” She heard Allison exclaim, and she slowed down her pace, allowing the brunette to catch up with her.

“Are you excited for tonight?” asked Allison, her light brown eyes gleaming brightly.

“Yeah, it’s gonna be...crazy.”

“You okay?”

Y/N forced a smile and nodded overenthusiastically.

“Yeah! Just tired. It was a long day,” she replied.

“Same here, which is why, we need to let loose tonight! Let’s get ready at Lydia’s, so we can all head over there together.”

“Sure. Quick question though, how did Lydia get us invited in the first place?”

Allison giggled, nodding her head towards Aiden and Ethan standing by their motorcycles.

“How do you think?”

The girl’s laughter echoed through the cool autumn air and disappeared with their cars. It was going to be a night to remember.

🌙🌙🌙🌙🌙

As Y/N and Allison reached Lydia’s house, Y/N couldn’t help but feel more and more anxious, tightly gripping her bag filled with clothes and makeup. The party was starting to worry her.

People had been whispering about it all day back at the high school, talking about the numerous illicit drinks that would be served and the intriguing entertainment. It seemed like the Danny had gone all out for Halloween. Still, not knowing exactly what to expect practically terrified Y/N. 

She was outgoing, but big crowds and chaos were things that made panic bubble up inside of her very core, quickening her heartbeat to a frightening extent. She loved dancing and partying, and much like other people her age, she loved a good drink every once in a while, but huge events and big blowouts, she had never been a fan of.

Putting on a brave face, Y/N shut the car door and walked up the stairs to Lydia’s front porch, ringing the doorbell as Allison locked the car. After what seemed like mere seconds, Lydia opened the door, letting the excited girls in.

“Finally. I thought I was going to have to get going without you,” she said, smirking at the pair.

“Y/N couldn’t decide what to wear,” replied Allison, sending Y/N a look that made Lydia scoff.

“Excuse me if I've never been to a neon-themed rave. How am I supposed to know what to wear?”

“Well the name of said rave could be a pretty good indicator,” mocked Lydia as the girls walked up to her bedroom, shutting the door behind them.

“Ali, what are you wearing?”

Allison giggled with a smirk and did a demonstrative twirl, showing off her burgundy flannel shirt and black jeans.

“This!”

Lydia raised her eyebrows at the brunette, a confused expression etched on her face.

“Am I the only one here who understands the term “neon”?” she asked.

Allison shook her head then slowly unbuttoned her shirt, revealing a neon pink bra.

Y/N laughed, shaking her head. This stunt was definitely orchestrated for someone special.

“Wow. Isaac will love it.”

“It’s about time you two did something about your situation,” joked Lydia, reaching for an eyelash curler.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” replied Allison with an innocent shrug and a slightly less innocent wink.

“Well now that Allison’s outfit is sorted, it’s your turn, Y/N. Let’s see what’s in this enormous bag of yours.”

The strawberry blonde bent down and grabbed Y/N’s bag before she could say anything, emptying its contents in a flash.

“No, no, definitely not, no…Y/N, why are all of these clothes black?” inquired Lydia, with a look of disgust she had difficulty hiding.

“Lyds, I told you, I don’t know what to wear to a rave.”

“Show me your bra.”

“What?”

“Show me your bra. If it’s the right colour, we can just pair it with some of my clothes.”

Y/N reluctantly removed her white shirt, revealing an electric blue floral lace bra, much to Lydia’s delight. Allison whistled approvingly.

“Okay here’s what we’re gonna do.” Lydia walked over to her closet, carefully studying its contents. Allison and Y/N exchanged a glance as Lydia clapped her hands together.

“This goes with this, and you have to tuck it in, like so,” she said, “okay, try this on. Now.”

Y/N looked down at the outfit her friend had put together.

“Yes ma’am,” she mumbled, her face as white as a sheet.

Y/N walked to the corner of the room as the girls chatted and finished getting ready. Her heart thundered as she passed her neck through the bottom of the sheer black top Lydia had handed to her. Looking herself in the mirror, all she could see was a blushing dishevelled mess. Her bra covered most of her chest, but the curves of her breasts were only slightly hidden by the black mesh material she was wearing.

“Okay, this is okay…” she muttered to herself, trying not to panic.

Bending down, she grabbed the black layered skirt she had brought with her and brought it up to her hips, tucking the top inside. The skirt helped balance out the outfit, but still Y/N wasn’t fully convinced.

“How are you feeling?”

“Kind of nervous honestly.”

“I meant how do you feel about the outfit- but you’re nervous? Why?” asked Lydia, walking over to Y/N in front of the full-length mirror.

“It’s just- I’ve never been to a big party like tonight, much less looking like…this,” Y/N reluctantly replied.

Lydia bit her lip and sucked in some air before smiling widely at Y/N and taking a step forward.

“By “looking like this” I hope you mean by looking incredible. Y/N, look at yourself. You’re tall and confident, the outfit looks amazing on you. Your look is not the problem,” she said, gently.

“Then what is?”

“You tell us,” replied Allison, walking over to the girls by the mirror.

Y/N exhaled deeply and turned around to face her friends.

“I hate crowds. I love partying don’t get me wrong, I just- I get really really panicky around big crowds of people. The noise, the warmth, all of it, just terrifies me. I’m worried that I’ll hate it and freak out or something. I’m sorry, I probably should have said something before.”

As soon as the daunting words had slipped through her lips, Y/N felt a weight lift from her weary shoulders, a wave of relief passing over her entire body.

“Hey, it’s okay. Everyone’s got something they’re uncomfortable with. It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” said Allison, sweetly.

“I know, it’s not that I’m ashamed, I just- didn’t wanna be a downer. I really am excited for tonight! I’m just nervous.”

Lydia placed her hands on Y/N’s shoulders and smiled brightly.

“Look, you’re gorgeous right now. Even without my help, you’re gorgeous. And tonight, we’ll be around the whole time. If you feel freaked out or you start to panic, we’ll go outside and get some fresh air. We don’t mind.”

“Exactly, we’re your friends. You know you can depend on us on occasion,” Allison joked and Y/N laughed, shaking her head timidly.

“Seriously, Y/N, we’re gonna have a ton of fun tonight. And if you need anything, whatsoever, we’re both here,” added Lydia.

Y/N’s heart swelled and she felt her eyes filling slowly. Blinking the impending tears away, she smiled widely, her radiant eyes following suite.

“Thank you, both of you. You’re the best.”

“Agreed. Now, that’s sorted. Are you comfortable with the outfit?” asked Lydia.

Y/N looked at herself in the mirror, analyzing every detail of her figure, taking in how “out there” the outfit was. After a few seconds, she nodded to herself and smiled.

“You know what? You only live once.”

Allison giggled and rested her arms on Y/N’s shoulder.

“Tonight is going to be amazing!”

🌙🌙🌙🌙🌙

As Lydia’s car pulled into the parking lot in front of the venue - a large concrete building comparable to a construction site - Y/N sent a text to her friend.

Y/N: we just got to danny’s party

Y/N: u guys here?

The girls looked up at the windows on the top level, the neon lights shining through catching their attention, the music already reaching their ears.

The group excitedly entered the building, Y/N’s heart thundering against her ribcage. Allison noticed the worried look on her friend’s face and she slipped her hand in hers, sending her a warm smile. Y/N took a deep breath, and the three beautiful girls went into the otherwise empty elevator. On the way up, Y/N’s phone vibrated against her palm and she looked down at the screen.

Stiles: we aren’t there yet

Stiles: Scott needed to go get something

Y/N’s heart couldn’t help but sink a little. She had hoped the boys were going to be there already, though why, she couldn’t say. Her phone interrupted her thoughts again.

Scott: by smth, Stiles means someone

Scott: and by someone, he means Kira

Scott: also we’re late because of the jeep

Scott: ;)

Y/N chuckled and texted him back, Lydia and Allison sharing an inquisitive look.

Y/N: figures :))

“Who is that?” asked Allison as the elevator doors opened.

Y/N winced slightly and turned to Allison.

“It’s the boys. Scott was just telling me they picked up Kira…”

“Oh.”

Lydia looked from Allison to Y/N, and back, the awkwardness beyond tangible.

“Are you okay?” asked Y/N, worried that the news had killed the mood.

“Honestly? I don’t love the idea of partying with my ex and his new girlfriend, but we broke up three months ago. We’ve both moved on. Besides, I really like Isaac. I’m not gonna let this ruin my evening,” Allison answered, a soft smile on her lips.

“Allison has Isaac, Scott has Kira, Stiles- well I don’t know about Stiles. That leaves you and me, Y/N. You can help me avoid Aiden tonight,” said Lydia, straightening her dress.

“Aiden, as in, the guy you hooked up with who just so happens to be the guy who invited you to this rave?”

“Precisely.” Lydia walked away hurriedly, and the girls laughed, entering the venue.

The grey concrete in the hall was uncharacteristically bland compared to the other-worldly burst of colours inside of the venue. Neon blue, pink, orange, yellow, and green exploding in every direction, paired with blaring purple lights attached to the concrete beams above the dancefloor where what looked like at least 70 people were jumping up and down to the beat of Losing It by FISHER. Strands of white UV tubes hanging from the ceiling all around the dancefloor lit up every white item of clothing in the room, turning the pure colour into a bright purple.

This giant nebula of chaos and colour made Y/N’s blood pump ten times faster throughout her body. That or the the bass blasting through the giant speakers by the DJ. Either way, the thrill of it made Y/N shiver, her whole body completely frozen in place. 

“This is crazy!” Allison gasped.

“Danny really went all out,” said Lydia, staring at the dancing figures in the center of the room.

Y/N’s phone buzzing woke her from her trance and she read the text.

Stiles: be there in about 20 minutes

Stiles: can’t wait to embarrass you on the dancefloor

Y/N: oof

“Let’s go get a drink,” Lydia urged, walking over to the large snack table with numerous bottles. Y/N read the labels and nodded, impressed by the wide range of drinks.

“Wow. Jack Daniels, vodka, a shitton of beer, wine coolers, rum, Jagermeister…Danny really did go all out.”

“Pass me a cup,” said Allison.

As the girls filled their glasses, Lydia eyed Y/N’s cup.

“Y/N, are you sure you want to start with a triple shot of vodka?”

“Yeah, it’s fine!” Y/N exclaimed, downing the drink before anyone could stop her and gasping as the strong liquid burned its way down her throat.

“Ohkay, take it easy,” said Allison, shooting a worried glance at Lydia.

“I’ve got it under control,” replied Y/N as she refilled her cup.

“Let’s go dance!”

Allison dragged the girls away from the table, walking over to the dancefloor. Y/N downed her second drink and nodded wearily.

“Yesss, let’s do this!”

The looming herd of party-goers, intimidating as it was, seemed a little less daunting now that Y/N was actually at the party.

“How bad could it be?” she thought to herself before treading through the mass, occasionally bumping against people energetically throwing their limbs around.

In the middle of the chaos, Allison stopped and started moving her hips in sync with the song, Lydia quickly following suit. Y/N bobbed her head along to the beat of the bass, her arms swinging awkwardly on either side of her body. Allison laughed and grabbed her friend’s arms forcing the movement to flow through Y/N’s limbs. Lydia busted up and down, moving her waist so naturally it seemed like she had been born for this very moment.

Closing her eyes, Y/N tried to focus on the music vibrating throughout her body, the memory of the colours surrounding her floating behind her eyelids. Allison sang along with the lyrics of the current song, shouting out the words as she moved from side to side. Y/N slowly started to lose herself to the music, letting go of her inhibitions, forgetting the world around her.

When the beat changed, her feet jumped up and down, as if they had a mind of their own. Her head felt heavy yet no thoughts crossed her mind. The music had gotten rid of all concentration, the only thing left was the bass flowing through her veins, making her entire body pulsate to the beat.

Beads of sweat trickled down Y/N’s neck as she kept dancing, her feet starting to ache with every jump. It had only been about fifteen minutes, but to the dancers, it seemed like a wonderful eternity. Finally, Lydia tapped on Y/N’s shoulder and shouted by her ear.

“Let’s do some body painting!”

Y/N nodded profusely, a wide smile on her lips.

“Ali went to dance with Isaac!” Lydia shouted as the pair pushed through the crowd.

“Where’s the paint?” shouted Y/N, trying to hear her own voice over the music and failing miserably.

“Over there!”

A tall blonde boy holding brushes with purple and pink tips smiled as the girls reached him, his charismatic grin turning Y/N’s cheeks bright red.

“What can I do for you ladies?” he asked, his pearly white teeth a bright purple as his grin widened.

“My friend over here needs a lot of paint. Emphasis on lot,”Lydia insisted.

Y/N shook her head, giggling stupidly.

“Not too much paint,” she said warmly.

The boy smiled with a wink.

“Let me worry about that.”

Y/N removed her mesh top, holding it with her right hand, patiently waiting for the boy to start painting across her chest and back. She shivered as she felt the cool wet tip of the brush meet her sweaty skin, sliding a few inches down, a thick stripe of paint spreading across her back. Y/N giggled at the cold feeling, the alcohol in her system reaching her head. She closed her eyes and bent her neck to the side as the boy continued his line up to her collarbone.

“What’s your name?” she heard him ask.

“What’s yours?” she chose to answer, smiling wickedly.

She heard him laugh as he started painting little dots up her back.

“Jeremy.”

“Nice to meet you, Jeremy.”

“You know most girls like a proper introduction before getting this close,” he said over the pulsating music, his breath fanning over Y/N’s neck as he painted small strokes down her shoulder. Y/N grinned mischievously.

“I’m not like most girls,” she teased as she turned to face him.

“No, I guess you’re not,” the boy replied, his eyes darting towards her lips and back up.

“I’m almost done with your body- I mean with the paint,” he said, shaking his head with a grin. Y/N giggled and stepped closer.

“I’m all yours…” she replied.

Jeremy’s deep blue eyes lingered on hers before focusing on her chest. Y/N thanked the universe that he wasn’t looking straight at her, otherwise he would have seen her cheeks fill with red for the second time. He delicately placed pink and orange dots up and down her chest, careful as to not stain her bra and she watched him, observing his concentration with admiration. Finally, he looked up, smiling at her.

“My masterpiece is done,” he declared, placing the paintbrush on the body paint stand.

Jeremy reached for a mirror and handed it to her. She admired the strands and dots painted across her body in a chaotic waltz, the hot purple and pink clashing against her skin. Looking up at him, she grinned widely.

“You’re talented,” she said.

“It’s easier when you have such a good canvas to work on…” he replied, sending her a look hot enough to melt her.

Momentarily remembering the outside world, she looked around and quickly realized Lydia wasn’t there anymore, probably off dancing or looking for Allison. Y/N turned back to Jeremy.

“I’m sorry, I should probably go check on my friends…” she said, biting her lip as she slipped her mesh shirt back on.

“Of course. Maybe later, we’ll bump into each other on the dance floor?” he replied, a nervous smile etched on his lips.

“Yeah, maybe.”

Y/N winked at him and walked away, trying her best to keep her cool.

“Well that was something.” She thought to herself, a wide grin planted on her face.

Looking around, she couldn’t find either of her friends, nor could she find Isaac. Slightly disappointed, Y/N walked over to the table and poured some vodka in an unused cup before knocking her head back, letting the burning liquid run down her throat.

She eyed the dancefloor and thought back on her previous conversation with Jeremy. She was beyond nervous. She’d never actually kissed a boy before. The opportunity just hadn’t ever presented itself. But now that she was here, feeling tipsy as ever, a few feet away from the cutest boy at the party, she couldn’t help but think, why not?

Wiping her sweaty palms on her skirt and downing her fourth - albeit, strong - drink of the night, she nodded to herself and walked over to the dancefloor.

As Five Hours blasted through the speakers, Y/N pushed her way through the sweaty crowd once again, making her way to the center of the dancefloor. Ignoring the world surrounding her, she closed her eyes and gave in to the music, feeling every beat of the song pulsate throughout her entire body.

Colours, flashing lights, the feeling of people’s skin against hers, her head spinning and swaying in every direction, it made her feel alive. As the last drop of the song reached its peak, Y/N jumped with the crowd, knocking her body against complete strangers, feeling the warm and sticky air fill her lungs with every breath.

The song Too Much by Curbi started to play and Y/N felt someone’s body against hers. Closing her eyes, she turned around and felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her waist. She sighed lightly, enjoying the feeling of her skin against the boy’s. His fingers treaded down her back, firmly settling just above her ass, holding her steady in a sea of bustling bodies.

She danced against him, turning around again, her back facing his front. Moving against his body, she felt his arms tighten around her, pulling her in. His hot breath fanned over her neck and she moaned slightly, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

Suddenly, time seemed to stand still when his lips lightly touched her warm skin. Y/N inhaled sharply, her eyes still shut. The only thing she could hear now was the sound of her heartbeat furiously thundering against her ribcage. Slowly caressing the boy’s arm, she allowed further access to her neckline, moaning loudly as she felt his feverish lips plant warm kisses on her neck, inching higher and higher. Y/N’s hands reached for his and she tugged them closer to her body, her hips still moving against him. His lips danced furiously across her neck, leaving dangerously beautiful marks on her skin.

The music seemed only to heighten her senses. Her legs almost gave out when she heard the boy groan lightly against her ear, her response, a small whine at the loss of contact with his lips. She turned around and tried to open her eyes, the bright lights bursting through the gap in her eyelids. Squinting at his face, trying as hard as possible not to lose herself to the music again, Y/N’s eyes caught a glimpse of the boy’s face.

Bright pink dashes stained his cupid’s bow and the right corner of his bottom lip, the paint from her neck helpless in the face of a passion like this one. Y/N’s eyes scanned the rest of his face and widened slightly when they met amber irises, warm and inviting and so familiar. Her fingers threaded through his damp dark brown hair, her brain trying to comprehend what was about to happen.

His chocolatey eyes looked deep into hers and he licked his lips slowly, the world around them fading. Y/N felt her vision blur as she inched closer to him, her nose picking up the scent of old leather and pine trees and rain. His lips lingered over hers and she felt a chill as her name echoed through the air.

“Y/N…”.

Their lips connected in a frenzied blur, sending sparks of pleasure throughout Y/N’s entire body and the chaos surrounding the pair completely swallowed them. His teeth slightly bit her bottom lip and she deepened the kiss, ardently giving in to his deliciously demanding mouth. Unable to control her body, she steadied herself against him, tugging at his shirt with one hand, the other cupping his face as he sucked on her delectable lips.

Their bodies so unbelievably close disappeared in the crowd of dancers, the whole world somehow a thousand miles away.

Time, a forgotten concept.

A/N: I seriously hope u enjoyed this!! if u did please reblog :)) (would be super helpful especially with tumblr acting up w the tags and all that) <3 part 2 coming soon!!

if you would like to be added to this series’ taglist, please send me an ask :)

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[wonderlandleighleigh]

85 Thoughts while watching Return of the Jedi

1. THE HELMETS ARE DUMB

2. I still love the idea that Stormtroopers fucking loved Vader, and all of the commanders were terrified of him. 

3. Vader helmet so shiny.

4. Back on Tatooine. It always comes back to Tatooine, doesn’t it? 

5. 3P0 was so hoping that the door wouldn’t open. He just wanted to go home. 

6. Everyone in Jabba’s palace looks really...gross. I guess that fits, right? Jabba’s palace is super gross, so.

7. I never understood as a child the slavery - and the sex slavery - aspect of Jabba’s palace. Only as an adult have I fully understood just how fucked up this is.

8. Remember kids, Luke has NO IDEA that Anakin was a Hutt slave as a child. Is there any canon stuff where he finds out about that? I’d be interested. 

9. Han’s carbonite face is so fucking dumb. 

10. Man droid torture is no joke. If that’s what they do to droids, think about what they do to people...

11. Oh god, the musical number. Like I thought it was funny when I saw it for the first time when they did the re-releases, but also, it’s this weird dissonance between that and Oola’s death. 

12. Jabba is so much creepier here than in New Hope. 

13. I love all the disguises and subterfuge in the opening storyline. And I love that they took the time to deal with Jabba and the bounty on Han’s head. It’s a nice break from the Galactic War. 

14. I remember watching this for the first time, and when Leia pulls the helmet off and is like “Someone who loves you” I was like OMG! And my shipper heart grew ten times as large.

15. Han is so...moist. Here. Blugh.

16. Ugh. God. Poor Leia. They do a good job of illustrating just how fucking terrible Jabba is, but...god dammit. 

17. Han and Chewie reunion! <3 <3 <3 

18. Luke Skywalker - Jedi Knight. Somewhere Mace Windu is looking at all of Luke’s attachments and impulsive behaviors and dry heaving. 

19. THE BIKINI IS GROSS! The only thing good about it is that Leia will eventually strangle Jabba to death while wearing it. Otherwise? Ugh.

20. Luke Skywalker. Jedi Knight. Fashion icon.

21. I always felt bad for the Rancor’s master. He loved his Rancor. And the Rancor was just as much a slave as any of the people in Jabba’s palace. It was probably only fed when there was a person Jabba wanted to kill so it would be as vicious as possible.

22. This trio is so bad-ass. 

23. Luke knows what the Sarlacc is. 

24. BANTHA HERD! 

25. Ugh. The Dune Sea is really fake-looking here.

26. R2 as waiter makes me so happy. It’s so ridiculous. 

27. “Convenient.” 

28. Anakin Skywalker would be so fucking proud of his daughter strangling Jabba the Hutt to death. It’s everything he ever wanted to do to fucking slavemasters on Tatooine. 

29. “Boba Fett. Boba Fett. WHERE?!” 

30. Per Dettiot: Luke went to Obi-Wan’s old hut on Tatooine and found the handbook to make his lighsaber, as well as some kyber crystals. What else he was up to between Empire and Jedi, I’m not sure.

31. Knee. High. Chanel. Boots. 

32. The sheer utter chaos and destruction would make Anakin Skywalker kvell*. 

33. I don’t know if Yoda considers Luke his friend. More like just another snot-nosed apprentice who will eventually disappoint him. 

34. Leave us alone, Palpatine. What a fucking pruny piece of shit. 

35. Yoda’s death is so bitter-sweet for me. I love Yoda. But he made so many mistakes in his life that he never really owned up to. I suppose he felt that his exile was his penance. But I don’t know if I agree. He could have come out of hiding to aid the Rebellion. 

36. Also, he was planning to die without coming clean to Luke about Vader. And that is some horse shit.

37. “Suffer your father’s fate.” At least he’s admitting that Anakin wasn’t solely to blame. That there was manipulation there. 

38. “I can’t go on alone.” Go find Ahsoka and Ezra! You’re not alone!! 

39. The fact that Obi-Wan truly believed that that Anakin had died and Vader took his place. 

40. Yoda and Obi-Wan never moved on from their trauma. They keep reliving their trauma and so they cannot move forward, and so they keep making the same mistakes over and over. Asking Luke to kill Vader is proof of that. 

41. And it really shows that Obi-Wan, even after his attachments to Satine and Akakin and Ahsoka - does not understand family. Luke saying “I can’t kill my father,” and Obi-Wan being like “Whelp. There’s no other way so the Emperor wins.” 

42. There being no mention of Luke and Leia’s mother ANYWHERE except for the one moment later on, drives me CRAZY. Obi-Wan could have told Luke about Padme then.

43. I love that Han and Leia can sit next to each other in a meeting and not have to have arms wrapped around each other. Just being next to each other is enough.

44. GENERAL SOLO! Leia’s face. “Excuse you, how did you suddenly get hotter?” 

45. The painted backgrounds are so beautiful. 

46. Poncho game is strong in this movie. 

47. FLY CASUAL is such a stupid line. I love it.

48. Skywalker twin exasperation is the best. Padme would be proud. 

49. Leia just going for it is so so good. 

50. I know Ewoks catch a lot of shit for...well..being Ewoks. But I love them. They’re adorable! And they have no qualms about eating humans! 

51. “My Son.” I think this is the first time Vader has referred to Luke as his son to someone who isn’t Luke, instead of the “Son of Skywalker.” 

52.  Watch as we realize that Leia has been holding the one brain cell this entire time, and Han, Luke and Chewie get totally clueless. 

53. PROPER. 

54. I love Ewok tree houses. 

55. Remember kids. They were planning to eat Han, Luke and Chewie. 

56. Where the hell did that dress even come from that Leia is wearing??? They just had that lying around? 

57.  I guess they ate the last woman who wore it.

58. I love that 3P0 in New Hope, claims he’s not much of a storyteller, and then in the Jedi like is like a master storyteller lol. 

59. And here, we get the only mention of Padme. And it wasn’t even Padme. It was a handmaiden. I will forever be salty that Padme isn’t mentioned at all because George didn’t think of her until the prequels. Argh.

60. Luke’s unwavering belief in Anakin is so amazing. The sequels did that part of his character so dirty. This version of Luke would never have tried to kill his nephew. 

61. “It is too late for me.”  God dammit, Anakin. The thing is that if he goes with Luke, he is admitting that everything he has done for the last twenty years is all for nothing, and he just fucking can’t do it. So much denial .So much pain. Fuck you, Vaderkin.

62. EWOK ON A SPEEDER 

63. REX! A REX SIGHTING! YES! 

64. Y’all remember that Ewok movie with the blonde child? “Star cruiser crash!!” 

65. Padme would be so proud of Luke’s fashion.

66. Wedge got promoted! Yay! 

67. I love the old Hollywood trick of shadowing the Emperor’s face except for his eyes. 

68. I just. I love that the Empire is defeated by fucking teddy bears. I know a lot of people hate it, but it’s just- it feels so karmic.  They’ve done such terrible things. And to be taken down by these fuzzy, little bastards. *chef’s kiss* 

69. Palpatine hitting in that nerve that Luke has about his attachments. About his hope. Oof.

70. The entire Vader fight is just him trying not to see how much like Padme Luke is. That’s gotta hurt. 

71. Bro. Vader. You do not want to try shit with Leia. Like. No. Fuck’s sake. Don’t try it. She’ll have all of you arrested and then executed. 

72.  Yes Luke. Thow away that lightsaber. Show that wrinky fuck who’s boss. 

73. I love that Anakin gets to make the right choice here. He does what he didn’t do with Mace. He finally realizes all the lies...all the manipulation...that he can make things different. And he does. And it rightfully costs him his life.

74. Vader couldn’t survive. Vader would have been tried for his crimes and either executed or jailed for the rest of his life. The same thing happened to Ben Solo in the sequels. He had to die. Otherwise he’d have to have a real-world ending: Prison or execution.

75. I feel so sad that Anakin became this fucking horror show of a person. It didn’t have to be this way. Fuck. 

76. “Tell your sister...you were right.” 

77. Oh Han no. No no no. 

78. No Han.

79. HAN. 

80. Han’s face when he finds out Luke is Leia’s brother is hilarious. 

81. I wish that Rex and Ahsoka had been there when Luke burned Anakin’s body. I feel like they needed to, for their own closure. And Luke would have felt like he had people who understood. Who loved and knew Anakin before all of this. 

82. AND NOW WE PARTY! 

83. Let’s eat Stormtrooper! 

84. I am SO MAD that all of this will be undone by the sequel trilogy. Ugh.

85. I want them to refilm Hayden now that he’s just about the age Anakin would have been when he died as a Force ghost. I feel like that would be really nice. 

*Kvell -  Yiddish - to be bursting with pride 

[dcbbw]

Sneak Peek Sunday (8-23-2020)

I know for certain I was tagged by @sophie-and-shizuku​, and I think I may have been tagged by @bebepac​. Honestly, I have not had a lot of time to work on anything because of work obligations but I do have a fic ready to post and a handful of almost-there WIPs; fics that if I just sat down and added one more section, or did a final read-through on, I could post.

For Sneak Peek Sunday, I present to you my They’re Almost Ready list.

Boomerang (Un-Romance AU):

Maxwell.

I wonder what he is doing here. Then I hear his voice carry over my partition.

“Hey, Reebee,” he says, using his nickname for me.

“Max!” I say a little too loudly and a lot too cheerfully.

He steps to my ‘doorway’. “I come bearing treats,” he announces as he holds out a brown paper bag in one hand and my pink drink in the other.

I tell him to come in, and he plops in the guest chair before handing me my drink and cookies. I place them on my desk and roll my chair around so I’m facing him. I eye him appraisingly: Maxwell looks good. He’s still slim with a head full of gelled hair; his face is still handsome in an odd way. Maxwell is the type that is always animated: eyes flashing and sparkling, a permanent half smile lifting one corner of his mouth, hands moving.

A man in motion.

Right now, his leg is jiggling while his fingers tap and dance against his pant-covered thigh.

“What brings you here?” I ask curiously.

“I dropped Pen off this morning and walking her to the elevator, we ran into Lynn going on a coffee run.”

I freeze momentarily. Maxwell dropped Penelope off? “You and Pen?” I ask in what I hope is a casual tone.

He nods happily. “I ran into her at a pet shelter a couple of weekends ago. We talked some, grabbed some lunch, and we’ve been … hanging out ever since.”

“He was looking for a peacock!” Penelope offered helpfully from her cubicle.

I nod slowly. “Hanging out,” I repeat.

Max’s eyes grow wide as he takes in my expression. “It’s not like that.”

We stare at each other. The yet is unspoken. 

Ghosts (Damien/Kai/Hayden ):

We were eating dinner in the living room. America’s Most Eligible was on, and for whatever reason, Kai and Hayden absolutely love that show. There were shrieks of laughter and finger pointing at the television set while I watched them absently, barely tasting my dinner.

Hayden noticed my lack of scoffing and reprimand and looked at me quizzically. “Are you okay, love?”

Kai put down her forkful of food to look at me through narrowed eyes. “Does this have to do with that client? What’s the job, Damien?”

She is neither suspicious nor jealous, just protective. Kai doesn’t love deeply or passionately; she loves fiercely.

I sip some cold beer. “I don’t know the job yet. I have to meet with them to find out.”

They both look at me skeptically. I shrug. “I just … I don’t know. I feel disconnected and I don’t know why.”

Except I do. I’m lying to the two most important people in my life, after mom and siblings, because of a man who left me three years ago. Over a phone call. I didn’t hear from him when I was heartbroken. I didn’t hear from him when robot assassins and a crazy man were trying to kill me and my friends.

No, he waits until I’m happy again to call. And I answered.

Love in a Time of Betrayal:

The light in the room was muted as the late afternoon sun filtered in through the closed window blinds. The heavy damask curtains were pulled open, tied back with cords of silk rope. They reminded her of an opera box.

Her hands ran down the front of his shirt, frantically pulling buttons through their holes; the diamond on her finger sparkled in the muted light of the room. The fabric was soft beneath her fingertips. Silk? Often washed cotton? It didn’t matter as she pulled the shirt from his broad shoulders. He let out a low laugh at her eagerness, his hair falling across his forehead in an endearing way.

She couldn’t wait to run her fingers through it.

The man pulled her closer to his bare chest, his short curly hairs matted to his skin. She breathed him in: pinecones, green grass, cognac. A hint of leather. Her lips found the crook of his neck and placed a kiss on his collarbone. He responded by planting a kiss in her hair.

They were star-crossed lovers, their hearts and their fates always at odds. The very Universe telling them constantly that they were not to be together, yet their bodies spoke differently.

Their love spoke differently.

She wondered if what they shared was lust or love, and always decided love. Lust could be sated, but her feelings for him never were.

He knew he loved her, with every fiber of his being. But he saw the signs: every chance they had at happiness was snatched away; sometimes cruelly, sometimes subtly. Either way, the pain was the same:

Deep. Hurtful. So intense not even the sweet release of death would alleviate it.

But here they were again, under the most trying of circumstances, attempting to right their world the only way they knew how.

The Queen’s Friendship:

The woman and Veronica were sitting in a dive bar, eating burgers and drinking beers. It had been five years since high school graduation, and their group of friends had disbanded:

Brenda’s mother had died soon after graduation, and she and her siblings had sold the house and divided the money. Brenda moved to Richmond, VA and had gotten a job with the state government. She was expecting her first child any day.

James had gotten a football scholarship from Auburn University. He played well, but not well enough to be noticed by the NFL. He was working as an accountant in Birmingham.

Michael D. had joined the Army.

Michael B. had moved to DC to attend Howard University and was applying to the police academy.

Shirley was in nursing school, and roommates with Rosalind, who was now a cosmetologist.

Ryan had gotten a degree in Physical Education Teaching and Coaching. He had always liked sports, but not playing them. He was waiting to hear back from the school board about a coaching position.

Veronica had gotten her meeting planning certification and was now looking to get into real estate.

The woman had her degree in Office Administration, along with the rest of the world. She had applied to several places but had yet to hear back.

Veronica dipped her French fry in ketchup as she studied the woman’s face. “I need you to be there! We’ve been friends forever and I want you to be my maid of honor!”

“You and Ryan are getting married?” The woman repeated her friend’s earlier statement, feeling foolish. Why, she wasn’t sure.

Veronica leaned back, tapping her nail against her chin. “I thought you were over Ryan?”

“I am! I am!” the woman hurriedly reassured her lifelong friend. “I just … wow, life is moving fast.”

Veronica nodded as she sat up straight. “It is, but it’s right, ya know?”

The woman nodded, but she didn’t know. She didn’t know how right felt. The two friends finished their meal, and on their way out, the woman saw a sign hanging on the wall: Now hiring waitresses, all shifts.

How I Met Your Wife:

The Duchess stopped fussing long enough to allow Yu to greet her deferentially; Riley smiled at the pretty, slim waitress and asked if there were a more private dining area she and her friends could enjoy their lunch. Yu arched an eyebrow; already the waitress held resentment against the Duchess. Of course she would want to lord her power and position over everyone else.

With a grunt, Yu led them to the private dining area reserved for large and/or private parties. Once the group was seated, Riley grasped Yu’s hand. “Thank you so much for accommodating my request. My appreciation will be reflected in your gratuity.”

Yu looked at the Duchess with a touch of incredulity before saying, “It’s the least I can do given that the King is offering the orchard workers some relief. I have family members who are affected.”

Riley looked at the waitress with concerned eyes before rummaging in her purse. “What are their names?”

Yu gave her the names before leaving the table with menus. She didn’t expect anything to come of it, but at least the new Duchess gave good lip service. She returned with the tea service in time to hear the Duchess on her phone arguing with someone who had to be the King.

“NO, you CANNOT return to the manor, Liam! And NO ONE is coming to the Palace! How in the HELL are you going to suggest WE use the SAME BAKER you and Madeleine were going to use?”

Silence as the Duchess listened to whatever the King was saying.

“I DO NOT CARE THAT THEY ARE THE ROYAL BAKERS! DO I LOOK ROYAL TO YOU?”

Yu hung back, not sure what to do. Riley smiled, and waved her over. “I am going to find a local Valtorian baker for the cake.” Brief silence. “IT ISN’T OUR WEDDING CAKE! I have three people, possibly four, with me RIGHT NOW who would LOVE to be the Duke of Valtoria! Don’t worry about who they are!’

More silence, then the Duchess hung up the phone. She looked at Yu. “The King will be joining us. Please send him here when he arrives.”

Coronation:

I run my hand through my hair while keeping the other on the steering wheel. The car is quiet, too quiet. I turn on the radio and a melancholy song fills the sedan.

And I bruise when you leave the room I never liked the way it felt Keepin' my hands to myself, mmm

Like some magic moment of which I'm not quite sure I wonder if you've ever been in love like this before You'll be scared when I possess you But you'll want me all the more

The music doesn’t help because my brain is filled with questions and images. There’s not enough room for the music and I impatiently turn the radio off. My phone rings; my hand fumbles on the passenger seat and I pull my eyes from the nearly empty road long enough to see it’s Beaumont calling and press the speaker button to answer.

“Yeah?” I growl as I check the speedometer and press a little harder on the gas pedal.

“Drake! We got Little Blossom! She’s going to stay!” he babbles excitedly in my ear.

I am quiet for a moment before I respond. “That’s great. Liam will be happy to hear it.” I don’t bother to ask Maxwell why he convinced Brooks to stay.

Liam made a choice. It wasn’t her.

“I thought you’d be more excited,” Maxwell says with some confusion in his voice.

“Olivia showed up at the Coronation, talked to Liam, and left. Then the pictures of Brooks came out. Wondering if there’s a connection.”

“You think Liv sent the pictures?”

I roll my eyes in annoyance. I try to keep the irritation out of my response. “No, Beaumont. I’m wondering if whoever did this to Brooks is behind Liv’s leaving.”

Desperate Measures:

Blinking back tears, Bertrand glanced at his watch. He raised an eyebrow as he realized it was almost time for his visitors. They were coming to meet with the stoic, confident Duke of Ramsford, not some maudlin, lovesick fool whose bank account was dangerously close to being overdrawn.

He pulled his papers together in neat stack and centered them precisely in the middle of the desk. He opened a drawer, and retrieved his lint brush, rolling it in brisk strokes over his suit jacket and sweater vest. Before leaving the study, he reached in a candy dish; he plucked a breath mint, which he popped in his mouth.

The Duke strode down the hall, ignoring the paintings and photos that lined the walls. He needed to check on lunch; the cook had been with the Beaumont family for decades; she still came in twice a week to do the grocery shopping and prepare dinner for the Duke and Lord. The rest of the staff had been let go; Bertrand could not afford to pay them, and people needed to make a living.  

Bertrand trusted the chef implicitly, and normally wouldn’t micromanage, but today was important.

This meeting could put House Beaumont back on the road to riches.

Crown Prince Liam’s social season was starting in two days’ time; Maxwell had accompanied the Prince and some friends to New York City. Bertrand had tasked him with finding a wealthy American socialite who may be willing to sponsor herself in the season. It was a long shot, but Bertrand was desperate. Nothing seemed too farfetched at this point.

House Beaumont could not afford to sponsor anyone; however, every house who entered a suitor received a stipend to cover expenses such as clothing, food, and transportation. The House with the winning suitor received press coverage and a check to be split with the suitor.

Bertrand needed a winning suitor.

But the noblewomen of Cordonia did not need House Beaumont; they had their own houses, and no need to come out of pocket. However, there was one suitor who was entering the season who came from a minor noble house. A suitor whose name was unknown despite her mother having strong ties to Cordonia.

A suitor who had money, and lots of it.

Lady Hana Lee of Shanghai.

What are you working on @ao719​ @bobasheebaby​ @katedrakeohd​ @glaimtruelovealways​ @burnsoslow​ @thecordoniandiaries​ @bbrandy2002​

[bexterbex]

A Soul to Mend His Own | Ch. 3

A Kylo Ren x Modern! Reader in a soulmate au with some canon divergence. —————————————SLOWBURN————————————–

He is already the Supreme leader, searching the universe to find you, his Empress. Your name on his wrist has been the only constant in his life, while you have doubts about his existence and his acceptance of you. He isn’t in the database and why did the name Kylo Ren cover Ben Solo?

Originally posted on my Ao3 Crystallclover. If you missed Chapter 1, Click Here

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Chapter 3: Of Speculation and Anticipation

Summary: “In fifteen minutes we will hear from the Prime Minister with more information about the First Order and what we as citizens are expected to do. Please stay tuned to CBC News for updates.” And “Tonight at 7 PM Eastern Standard Time First Order Supreme Leader Ren will address the public for the second time.”

_______________________________________________________________________

You arrive home and park in your building’s ramp. You see Carter pulling into the guest parking zone. You wait for them.

“Want to order something for lunch,” asked Carter.

“Sure, does curry sound alright,” you asked. Carter nodded and you both headed into your building.

You both took the stairs up to your floor and you unlocked your door. Both of you took off your shoes and you pulled out your phone to do your usual curry order

“So this thing with the First Order. What do you think? How many people are out there,” Asked Carter.

“I don’t know what to think. This all feels like some weird Sci-Fi movie. Why is this the first time we have been contacted by some sort of ‘alien’ race? This is just weird,” you responded. You pulled out your laptop and set it up on your small kitchen table. You set up a live feed to the CBC News broadcast and plugged your laptop in.

“What if they are really peaceful and don’t mean any harm. You heard that man, the Supreme Leader I think that’s what he’s called, as long as we follow orders we should be fine,” responded Carter.

Suddenly you both get a text in your group chat from Hayden asking, ‘What’s up with this alien invasion thing 👽? Spooky 👻’

“Should we invite him over,” asked Carter.

“Yeah, let’s see if I can add to the lunch order,” you responded while Carter texted Hayden back.

“Damn it, it won’t let me. Let me check if I have any salad or anything to go with it,” you told Carter.

“Why don’t I text Hayden that if he plans on coming over now he needs to bring something,” asked Carter.

You nodded with approval. Although Carter texted Hayden separately he is always the type to respond in the group chat. ‘Coolio, I’ll pick up some drinks and chips and hummus 😂’

“Why he does that I’ll never understand,” you stated. Carter nodded in agreement.

The live stream on your laptop flashed so you unmuted it.

Live from Ottawa

“In fifteen minutes we will hear from the Prime Minister with more information about the First Order and what we as citizens are expected to do. Please stay tuned to CBC News for updates,” said the blond anchorwoman. You turned down the volume on your laptop to a background noise level.

“Dang. Hopefully, he has more information as to who they are. I have been checking the government website all day and no one really has anything. Their Supreme Leader is a total mystery,” said Carter.

You both then went to minding your phones. You scrolled through twitter. Everyone was talking about #alieninvasiondc and #firstorder. No one had any real news, just speculation from what you could see. Ironically the #raidarea51 tag was trending again talking about how this is what the U.S. government was hiding.

There was a knock on your door. You went to open it. The delivery person was there with your food. You paid him and he went on his way. Almost immediately after you shut the door there was another knock. Hayden this time with the drinks and chips and hummus.

He walks in without taking off his shoes and said, “aliens man who would have thunk.”

“Take off your damn shoes I don’t know how time I have to tell you,” you scolded Hayden who made his way back to the door.

“Ok jeez it’s not like your apartment is huge. It won’t take long to clean it,” Hayden responded.

Carter just rolled their eyes at the two of you. Hayden was the more relaxed, and slobby of the three of you. You were more type A, where everything had a place and you like things just so. He was definitely the extrovert of the group, someone who could have a 3-hour long conversation with a bartender about their life. Meanwhile, you were more of an introvert. Carter was the perfect balance for you two. Ever the optimist but an ambivert none the less.

Hayden loved conspiracy theories. Always talking about a new one here or there. He was the least adult out of the three of you. You had your habits and the way you liked things. Being a minimalist you liked the things you liked the way you liked them. You needed to be efficient and precise in order to survive your home and work life.

“My apartment may be small, but if it bothers you why is it that we always end up here, hmm?” You responded sarcastically.

Hayden just shrugged and went about preparing himself a plate of curry, rice hummus and chips while grabbing a cider from the six-pack he brought.

“I don’t know if you heard but the Prime Minister will be speaking in a few minutes, hopefully with more information on this First Order stuff,” said Carter trying to distract you two from your usual petty disagreements.

Carter was the glue to your friendship. The rock to keep you three together. Despite Hayden’s extroversion, there were still some prejudices against the unmatched. He could easily find someone to go home with after a night at the bars but had a hard time making lasting friendships until he found Carter.

“Cool, love seeing my man Trudeau,” said Hayden.

Just now your laptop screen flashed with the news report. You turned up the volume.

Live from Ottawa

The Prime Minister started to speak, “as you all know yesterday there was a visit to Earth by a then-unknown group who we now know to be the First Order. Earlier this morning the U.S. President spoke to everyone on behalf of the United Nations. I myself and many others are in agreement that the First Order have come here in peace. I ask everyone in Canada to act peacefully and follow all instructions that you may receive from the government or the First Order.

You will be able to register at all public government offices like the housing department, the post office, the motor vehicle registration office, the social insurance number office, the immigration office and more. In the upper parts of provinces and in major cities there will be temporary registration stations. Please check the government website canada.ca to find any more places to register.

We ask that all citizens of Earth remain calm and proceed to be registered. Earlier the President said that citizens may be reassigned to duties within the First Order. This will only happen with your consent and only to positions, the First Order may need. You also may have the choice to temporarily be reassigned to help with registration.

The First Order will also be removing all standard currency and will be shifting all current wealth into the galaxy’s credit system or galactic credit. No citizen will lose any portion of their wealth and all physical currency will be able to be exchanged at any bank, credit union, or any government office and all digital currency or any currency currently kept at a bank or credit union will be converted automatically. This will happen 3 days after the trade deadline. By the end of the month, Earth will join the galactic trade economy and will be able to set up trade with any planet within the First Order rule.

Tonight at 7 PM Eastern Standard Time First Order Supreme Leader Ren will address the public for the second time. It is important that all citizens tune into the news and all employers are mandated to allow all employees the opportunity to watch or listen to Supreme Leader Ren’s speech. Thank you.”

All three of you sat stunned looking at the laptop. Carter was the first to speak.

“Is he human, Supreme Leader Ren I mean? You saw that helmet thing I wonder what's under there” asked Carter.

“I don’t know maybe he’s got like a tentacle face like Davey Jones did from that Pirates of the Caribbean movie. What do you think Y/N,” asked Hayden.

“You both say the videos of last night’s landing right? There was a ginger man with them, maybe they are human, but there is probably some sort of mix within their ranks. You’ve both seen Star Trek and other Sci-Fi movies. There is a possibility all of the First Order with helmets are some other species. Maybe they brought that ginger man to calm us all down so we don’t have an alien vs predator thing,” you said.

Both Carter and Hayden seemed to nod in agreement. For a little bit, you all went about eating your food.

“Hey, this might be one of my crazy theories but what if your guys’ matches are some weird alien species,” said Hayden. “Like think how cool that would be!”

“I will love whoever or whatever they are. The universe thought it was important enough to put their name on my wrist so that is all I care about,” said Carter continuing to eat.

You just simply looked down at the names on your wrist. You secretly hoped that Kylo/Ben wasn’t going to be disgusted at you being human.

[ellewritesathing]

So Close - S.S. XLIII

Summary: The universe has a funny way of putting the things you want right in front of you, but just out of reach. Stiles and Y/N have been best friends ever since Scott brought him home, but when Stiles realizes that he might want to be something other than best friends, she leaves to go to some fancy private school up North. Now that she’s back though … maybe he’s got a shot? A Teen Wolf AU in which the reader has always been so close to Stiles and yet so far.

Masterlist   Prev. | Part 43

Word-count: 7k+

A/N: and that’s 5b!! it’s been crazy but thank you all for reading 💕

Considering how quickly he got you home, you were pretty sure Stiles broke about a dozen traffic laws in the process, but you were too relieved to crash on your living room couch to care very much. Noah would void any speeding tickets he got anyway.

You settled into the living room couch and Stiles disappeared into the kitchen. He came back with a blood bag and you started pushing yourself up as you argued that you didn't need it. Blood might speed up the process, but it was sickening to drink (and that was when you were alone). It might take a little while, but you’d heal on your own.

“No, listen to me, okay?” Stiles said, kneeling next to the couch to look you in the eye. “You almost bled out in my Jeep. I know you’ll heal on your own, but this’ll make it go faster. And I- I need you to heal.”

Your eyes dropped from his and to the blood bag that he was trying to put in your hand. Mumbling, you curled your hand around the bag. “You fight dirty, Stilinski.”

“You know it, sunshine,” Stiles said with a wink and barely-there smile.

“Can I at least get a straw?”

“What are you gonna do? Drink it like a juice box?”

“Not if you don’t bring me a straw.”

Stiles laughed but disappeared into the kitchen anyway. His laugh was the only thing from this entire night that felt right. It made almost dying feel worth it. But any trace of that laugh was gone when he came back from the kitchen with your straw in one hand and his phone in the other. Scott had texted him.

Mason was the Beast, and he was missing.

You set the bag down on the couch and got to your feet, closing your eyes for a second when you started seeing stars. “Oh my god, we’ve gotta looking for him-”

“Malia’s on it,” Stiles said, guiding you back onto the couch. “So is everyone who’s not on the verge of dying. Plus, Kira’s bringing Scott home now, so we can talk it through with them.”

Annoyingly, his logic checked out; if you went out there now, you could get killed. So instead, you sighed and laid back down on the couch. It hurt too much to keep fighting anyway. “Stiles … will you stay with me until they get back?”

“Of course.”

You made space for him and Stiles sat on the couch with you, very politely ignoring your bloody juice box. As weird as the situation was, it was made weirder by the fact that Stiles reached over and put the tv on. It felt wrong to watch tv when you were drinking blood and the world was ending outside. You guys managed to watch an entire episode of New Girl when Scott and Kira got home and tried to sneak up the stairs to his room.

“We should probably go check on them,” Stiles said, still massaging the one side of your head to make up for when he tried to run a hand through your hair and accidentally got stuck in some of the matted bits. His cheek rested on the top of your head.

You stretched out with a sigh. The blood had kicked in by then, and you were healed enough that moving didn’t hurt or pop open any of the wounds. “Probably.”

“After another episode?” Stiles asked.

You laughed and started untangling yourself from him. “As much as I’d love that, I need to take a shower.”

“Yeah, I didn’t want to mention that but … you kinda smell.” Stiles faked being oblivious as he stretched out and you hit him lightly with one of the throw pillows. He burst out laughing. “What? It’s true.”

You rolled your eyes but went upstairs with him anyway, parting ways in the hallway outside of the bathroom.

Seeing yourself in the mirror, you looked rough. Your clothes were shredded and stained, your arms were scraped up, and there was some blood on the corners of your mouth from when Stiles tried to save you. Kind of scary, but nothing a shower and change of clothes couldn’t fix.

It took longer than expected, but once you were finished and dressed, you looked like yourself again. You were still drying out your hair when you met Stiles in your room. He was sprawled out on your bed, reading through one of the library books you’d taken out when you guys were still trying to figure out who and what the Beast was. He had dark circles around his eyes.

Until that moment, it hadn't registered how difficult this night must have been for him. He'd had to play lacrosse before all hell broke loose and pretend everything was fine. He pretended when you woke up too. You wondered how many times he tried to wake you up before trying to feed you, or how it felt to find you and Liam in a bloody heap in the parking lot.

“Hey, how is your back healing?” you asked as you made your way over to him. Stiles lifted his arm and you ducked underneath to lie down on his chest. “Still sore?”

Stiles shrugged and moved the book so you could get comfortable. “Sometimes. None of them got me deeply,” he said casually. You might have believed him if you couldn’t hear his heart. “What about you?”

“I’ll be back to normal by morning,” you said, placing your hand on his chest. “Do you need me to take some of your pain so you can sleep?”

“Nah, I’ll just take an Advil if it flares up,” Stiles said. Again, his heart jumped ever so slightly, but you didn’t want to push it. This night was stressful for him.  

Stiles laid the book down on his stomach and put his hand over yours on his chest. The bandage on his wrist brushed your arm as he moved and your heart lurched. He shouldn’t get hurt so much for you.

“You know, it wasn’t supposed to be like this,” you said.

“Be like what?” Stiles asked.

You tapped his chest uncertainly and took a deep breath. “Deaton said the blood was supposed to be temporary because I died,” you said quietly. “But it’s been like three months and if I don’t drink it then it’s like my body shuts down. I’m supposed to be like Scott but I’m like something out of the freaking Vampire Diaries.”

“Hey, it could be worse. You could be from Twilight,” Stiles pointed out. You rolled your eyes, but he laughed and squeezed your hand slightly. “No, I know it’s not supposed to be like this but it has to be for something, right? Like if you stayed at your fancy private school then everything would be different. Or if Scott hadn’t been bitten then we'd have Derek trying to alpha his way out of a paper bag." That made you smile. "It’s like … as much as this sucks sometimes, it has to be for something.”

It was quiet for a moment, so still that you could hear Stiles’ heartbeat without your super hearing.

“Right?”

You didn’t answer right away. Instead, you moved to prop yourself up on your elbow, your other hand still on his chest. You smiled at him and looked down at his lips for a second before meeting his eyes. “I think you’re my something.”

Stiles’ mouth curled up at the corners and he took his hand off yours to move some hair behind your ear. “I’d like that.”

“Yeah, me too,” you said with a smile. Your hand snaked up from his chest to cup his jaw and you leaned in to kiss him as he tilted his head up. The result was a slightly clumsy kiss at first, but neither of you minded.

---

Seeing as Scott barely survived his fight with the Beast, you all decided to let him sleep in while you met in the kitchen to discuss what to do. Noah had already put an APB out on Mason in case he showed up, and Liam and Malia had been searching through most of the night. Scott didn't need to be there right then, he just needed to heal.

“It still might not be him,” Liam said from the barstool next to you. He’d been so upset the whole morning, understandably so, but it hurt to see him like this. Your other friends must have felt the same because they didn’t say anything. Liam untangled his arm from yours as he said, “But Hayden’s at the school looking anyway.”

“I can keep checking the woods,” Malia offered.

“And my mom can check all the hospitals in the county,” Scott said as he walked in. He didn’t have a scratch on him this morning, but he still needed to rest. “We can find him.”

“What happens then?” Liam asked.

“We figure out a way to save him,” Scott said.

“Okay, where else could we look?” Lydia asked.

“Let’s ask Corey,” Scott said. He put his hand out and grabbed something from the shelf behind him, and Corey materialized a moment later.

All your friends jumped. Liam pulled you behind him as he got to his feet did. It was almost cute enough to distract from Corey's eavesdropping.

“Wait, wait, wait! It’s not my fault,” Corey stammered. “They took him and I couldn’t do anything.”

“They took him? Who?” Scott asked.

“The Dread Doctors,” Corey said. It only took a second of Scott glaring at him for Corey to crack and launch into an explanation of what happened when they left the school the night before. “See, so it wasn’t my fault! I- I was trying to protect him.”

You touched Liam’s arm lightly before he could snap at Corey for not doing a very good job. “We know you tried,” you said. “But it looks like we’re going to need a new plan. Can you tell us anything else?”

Corey looked away from Scott and thought about it for a second. You hoped that some part of him trusted you like Josh did. Eventually, he nodded. “I can tell you everything.”

---

It was decided that the best way to find Mason was to split up. Stiles and Lydia went to talk to Noah, Kira was trying to get her sword back from her dad, Malia gave up on the woods to deal with her mom, and you, Scott, and Liam were going to deal with Theo.

If there was one thing you hated more than your friends splitting up, it was meeting with Theo in the Dread Doctors old operating theatre.

The place gave you the creeps; it was dark, filthy, abandoned, and to top it all off, Theo was there. He stood with his back to you, staring at one of the empty pods. It looked haunted.

“They called him Der Soldat,” Theo said, still looking at the pod. “That’s German for ‘The Soldier.’ I’m pretty sure he fought in World War II.” He turned to face you guys and sighed.

“And he was a Nazi,” Scott guessed.

“And an alpha werewolf,” Theo said. “The Dread Doctors were using him to prolong their lives. They’ve been doing it for decades. Actually, probably longer.”

“Wait, how old are these guys?” Liam asked.

“Who knows,” Theo said. He didn’t add ‘and who cares’ but you knew he was thinking it. He didn’t care about anything other than his own survival. “But wherever they go, he goes, too.”

“So we find him and we find Mason,” you said, arms crossed over your chest. Theo nodded. “How do we find him?”

Theo took a breath and looked down at the ground for a second. “Keeping him alive requires a pretty unique set of conditions: there’s got to be a power source, it has to be underground-”

“And on a telluric current,” Scott said. He took out a copy of the telluric current map from his jacket sleeve and handed it to Theo. It hung in the air for a second - with you not thinking this was a good idea and Theo probably not believing this was happening.

He took the map from Scott and smiled as he unfolded it. Almost all the currents intersected in the Beacon Hills Preserve. “Looks like we’re going for a hike,” Theo said.

Scott looked over at you and Liam, asking what you thought without talking. Liam shrugged, all he wanted to do was find his best friend. You weren’t so sure about it but you nodded anyway. It was better to have Theo in your sights than lurking around in the dark on his own.

That’s the only reason why you sat with him on the drive out and why you walked behind him when you got there. Working with him to find Mason was one thing, but trusting him was something you weren’t prepared to do.

After an eternity of walking through the woods in the dark, Scott asked, “So where is he?”

“I thought we were looking for him,” Theo asked, pretending to sound confused.

“You know who I’m talking about,” Scott said.

“Deucalion?” Theo asked. You rolled your eyes.

“You shouldn’t trust him,” Scott said.

“You’re the one who let him live,” Theo said.

“I’m not a murderer,” Scott said.

“You still think you’re gonna get through all this without killing anyone?” Theo asked. He threw a look over his shoulder at you and Liam. “I guess that’s why you have them.”

“Yeah, so don’t push your luck,” you snapped. Theo laughed and looked ready to say something equally snippy but then Liam stopped. He looked like someone punched him.

“We’re close,” he said, looking at the ground. Scott asked if he had Mason’s scent and Liam nodded, but he didn't move.

“Great. Which way?” Theo asked.

Liam looked at you out of the corner of his eye before flicking his eyes over to Scott. He didn’t trust that Theo wouldn’t kill Mason as soon as you found him.

“Oh, you think you’re going to leave me behind?” Theo asked, laughing slightly. Man, the longer this went on, the more unhinged Theo got.

“Liam …” Scott started.

“Look, he wants to kill him,” Liam argued.

“I just want his power,” Theo argued. Like that was any better. “You want to fight someone that actually wants to kill Mason? Go fight Parrish.”

“Who did you see when you put on the mask?” Liam asked.

“I already told you - it wasn’t Mason,” Theo said.

“You want us to trust you?” you asked. You jutted your chin at him. “Then tell us who you saw.”

Theo sighed exasperatedly and looked over at Scott for a second. “I saw a man dying in the snow,” he confessed. “He was impaled on a spear.”

“It’s called a pike,” Scott said. “Lydia told us the story.”

“Then you guys know what it means,” Theo said, surprisingly unbothered by not knowing something. “Time’s running out. Where is he, Liam? What direction?”

Liam still didn’t seem convinced that he could trust Theo, but he was right about time running out. “I can stay here with him,” you offered quietly, touching his sleeve lightly.

“No, it’s-” Liam shook his head. He sighed and started storming past Theo and Scott. “He’s this way.”

The four of you went back to walking in moody silence but Liam picked up the pace as you got closer. He was getting impatient. He didn’t say anything as you guys reached an old wooden structure in the woods - calling it a cabin would be generous, it just looked like a wooden box with overgrown trees around it - or as he reached out to grab the handle, but Scott caught his hand just before he touched it.

“Listen,” Scott said.

There was a heart beating somewhere beyond the wooden frame.

“It’s him.” Liam threw the creaky door open and raced inside.

Scott followed behind him fairly quickly, probably to make sure Liam wouldn’t get lost, which left you with Theo. He looked at you, you glared at him, he laughed under his breath, and then he went inside. You cast one last look at the woods before going inside.

It reminded you of the root cellar that Blake had kept everyone’s parents in; surprisingly built up and covered in dust and decaying roots. The stairs were so old that they groaned with every step and you hoped that none of them were rotted. All you needed was to get a broken ankle.

When you finally reached the bottom, you got goosebumps. It was freezing and only lit by dim green light. This place was haunted by the ghosts of all the failed experiments and violent deaths of the woods. Suddenly, you were glad your friends had decided to split up and that most of them didn’t have to see this.

Liam found Mason collapsed against the big pod that emitted the green light. As happy as you were to find Mason, you couldn’t take your eyes off the decaying body inside the pod. Der Soldat.

Reflexively, you reached out for the person next to you only to find yourself holding onto Theo’s wrist. You let go with a scowl and nodded at Der Soldat. Theo’s eyes landed on him and you could see how hard he was working to not show any emotion on his face.

“It’s connected to him,” Scott said, spotting the tube that ran from Der Soldat’s stomach, up the pod and out again, and into the back of Mason’s neck. He crouched next to Liam to see if he could help Mason.

“What is this thing?” Mason asked. You didn’t even realize he was awake.

“I don’t know,” Theo answered. His eyes met yours for a second and it felt like he meant it.

“Liam, I can feel it,” Mason said. He sounded like he was close to crying, which was understandable considering everything he’d been through these past few weeks, let alone these past few hours. He took a shaky breath. “It- It’s in my skull.”

“Don’t move,” Liam said, looking up at Der Soldat. He was trying to figure out how to disconnect them without ripping out parts of Mason's skull.

“Careful,” Scott warned.

Liam turned to Theo. “What are they doing to him?”

“I don’t know,” Theo said. He sounded too harsh for your liking, even if he was fed up with no one believing him the whole night.

“Guys, let’s focus,” Scott said. Always the alpha. All Scott’s attention was on Mason, and if you were him you wouldn’t want anyone other than Scott on your side. “Mason, we’re gonna get you out of here.” He turned to Liam very slowly and added, “Hold him still. I’m going to try to pull it out. Mason, let me know if it hurts you.”

“Scott, wouldn’t it be easier to sever the tube?” you asked, trying not to sound like you thought the current course of action would kill Mason.

“We’ll try that next,” Scott said. He wrapped his hand around the bit of glass that encased a part of the tube and started pulling.

Immediately, Mason started screaming. Scott let go. “It hurts!” Mason groaned. “It definitely hurts.”

“I barely moved it,” Scott said to Liam.

The clicking started before Liam could respond, coupled with the heavy breathing and low hum of their suits. You looked at Theo out of the corner of your eye before you both turned to face the Dread Doctor. If this was a trap, he didn't know about it.

You moved, slowly, in front of Liam and Mason as Scott stood up.

“They wanted us here,” Theo said in a low voice. He didn’t take his eyes off the Dread Doctor, but they snapped to the other side of the room when the clicking started again. Another Dread Doctor. You just needed one more to complete the set.

“Help Liam get that thing out of Mason’s neck,” Scott told you quietly.

You crouched down and nodded at Liam as one of the Dread Doctors hissed from the back of the room. It called Theo a failure. As much as you agreed, you had other problems you needed to focus on.

You looked for the part where the tubes connected. If there was a weak spot, that was bound to be it. There wasn’t one. But if you could cut the tube, then you might be able to make a run for it, even if someone had to support Mason and the thing attached to his head.

“Liam,” you whispered. You nodded at the tube and reached for your knife. He nodded and held onto Mason. The two of you just had to trust that Scott and Theo could hold off the Dread Doctors while they verbally destroyed what was left of Theo’s self-esteem.

“From you, we learned that true evil only comes from corrupting something truly good,” the Dread Doctor hissed. Theo threw a punch at him.

You forced the knife through the tube as all hell broke loose. Scott jumped into action and Liam dove forward to protect you from the other Dread Doctor, but Mason was groaning. The fluid was leaking out of the broken tube. He yelled for Liam, and you tried to help but it was like he couldn’t even see you there. You thought you’d killed him when he screamed and got to his feet.

“Transformation without frequency,” the Dread Doctor said.

Mason’s eyes started glowing and you backed away as quickly as you could. Liam called out his name as the shadows started engulfing Mason. “That’s not my name,” Mason said in a deep and distorted voice. The shadows wrapped around him and he transformed into the Beast.

You ducked as it swung its arm at you and heard it crack one of the Dread Doctors’ masks. You crawled over to Liam and Scott in an attempt to get away, lungs burning from the memory of being torn out the last time you got close to this thing.

The Beast lifted one of the Dread Doctors into the air by their neck and literally squeezed their head off. The body fell with a deafening thud. And then it threw Theo to the ground and grabbed the other Dread Doctor, dragging it up the stairs.

By the time you guys got up there with it, Parrish was there and Chris and Gerard were unloading shotgun bullets into The Beast’s back as it tried to get away. It started transforming on the other side of the bridge, but you weren’t looking at Mason when it was done.

“La Bete du Gevudian, I know your name!” Gerard said. The man turned to look at Gerard over his shoulder. “Do you remember mine?”

He grimaced slightly. “Argent.” The man took off into the forest and Parrish raced after him.

“Who the hell was that?” Scott asked.

“You’ve seen the Beast of Gevaudan,” Gerard said. He nodded in the direction where the man and Parrish went running. “That was the Man.”

“Sebastien Valet,” Chris said, much more helpfully.

“But if that was Sebastien then … what happened to Mason?” you asked.

“I don’t know,” Chris said, taking his eyes off the woods to look at you. His heartbeat jumped. “We’ll follow Parrish. You kids see if he’s still alive and take him to the animal clinic.”

“Theo will be fine,” you said.

“Not him,” Gerard said with that creepy smile of his. “The Surgeon.”

As if in response, the Dread Doctor on the floor’s suit let out its familiar clicking sound. You only had a second to look at Scott before he dove to pick up the Dread Doctor. With your brother carrying the almost lifeless body of your enemy, you and Liam led the way back to the car.

At least with Scott keeping the Dread Doctor together, you got to drive. You made it to Deaton’s in record time with minimal curse words.

You threw open the back door for Scott and Liam to carry the Dread Doctor, but paused when you got inside and saw Stiles with Deaton and a case file. They knew something.

“He’s still alive,” Scott said, snapping you out of your thoughts. He and Liam pushed past Stiles and Deaton to put the Dread Doctor on the exam table. The suit was still clicking, but not humming. “Can you keep him alive?” Scott asked as Deaton started feeling where the Dread Doctor’s organs should have been.

“I’m not sure he technically is alive,” Deaton said.

“Screw keeping him alive. How do we get him to talk?” Liam asked.

“Personally, I don’t think we utilize torture nearly enough,” Stiles said. God, you missed him a disgusting amount for only being separated for a day.

You were about to say that the Dread Doctor needed to be alive to talk when a man’s voice echoed in your head. “Come.” You blinked in an attempt to focus.

“Did you hear that?” Liam asked.

“Come to me,” the man said. It had to be Sebastien. You looked towards the back door to try and figure out where he was. “To me.”

The Dread Doctor bolted up, his suit clicking and making a high-pitched vibrating noise. It was almost as good at scrambling your brain as one of Lydia’s screams. You clutched your ears and collapsed to the ground as everything in the clinic shuddered. You and Stiles crouched together, and you barely saw Liam jumping into action before Scott started yelling.

“Liam, wait!”

The Dread Doctor sent out a blast that knocked Liam into a wall and walked out. He sent off another one when he was outside, frying the electrical circuit and magnetizing the door. You barely had enough time to pull Stiles out of the way before one of the tables tried to decapitate him.

You didn’t have time to check on Stiles before Liam ran towards the exit and another set of sparks went flying.

“Stop!” Deaton yelled. You and Stiles got to your feet, holding shaky hands. “It’s electrified.”

You stood deathly still as you tried to drown out the electricity and focus on what Sebastian and the Dread Doctor were saying. He wanted the pike but the Dread Doctor said the Argents had it.

“The cane,” Scott whispered.

“But they took it,” Liam said. “They took the cane.”

And then the Dread Doctor fell to the ground. You jumped at the sound his skull made as it met the pavement. He was dead. All the Dread Doctors were dead.

---

“Maybe there’s something in here,” Scott said as he flipped through the pages in the case file that Stiles had brought. “Something about how he was a genetic chimera.”

“Mason had a vanishing twin,” Deaton said.

“Now we’ve got a vanishing Mason,” Stiles said.

“Wait, he ate his twin in the womb?” you asked. It wasn’t the weirdest thing to ever happen but you couldn’t help your reaction. Deaton nodded but Liam started talking before he could say anything.

“What does that have to do with him turning into a 250-year-old French guy?” Liam asked. “How does that even happen?”

Deaton touched Liam’s arm gently. “Hold on, Scott might have something.” He paused for a second to breathe and gather his thoughts. “Mason’s twin wasn’t entirely gone. That’s what made him a genetic chimera.”

A moment of silence passed and then Scott said, “The DNA was still there.”

“Metaphorically speaking, the DNA of Mason could still be inside Sebastien as well,” Deaton said with a nod.

“How?” Stiles asked.

“Life is energy. Energy doesn’t just disappear,” Deaton said. He looked down at the mask on the exam table. “The Dread Doctors may have found a way to break the rules of the supernatural world, but there are some rules that simply won’t break.”

“So Mason can’t just be gone?” Liam asked, sounding more hopeful than he'd been all day.

“Somewhere in Sebastien, Mason has to still exist in some form,” Deaton said. Stiles picked up the mask as Deaton spoke. You half expected it to start clicking. “A spark of energy, a flicker of memory.”

Stiles looked up. “Hang on … Liam, you said Mason said something right before he turned.”

“He said, ‘That’s not my name,’” Liam said.

“He finally remembered his name,” Scott said, looking at Stiles.

“Damnatio Memoriae,” Stiles said.

“That’s what they wanted!” Liam said. “They wanted Sebastien to remember his name.”

“So all we need to do is get Mason to remember who he is,” you said.

“How do we do that?” Liam asked. “Walk up to the Beast, yell Mason’s name and turn him back?”

“Not us,” Scott said. “Lydia.”

---

Either Sebastien remembered Lydia from Mason’s memories or he got lucky at the police station. Thankfully, she was still alive - Noah got her to the hospital in time - but you and Liam had to wait in the waiting room while Stiles and Scott spoke to her.

You stood up when Scott started walking closer. “Is Lydia okay?”

“She’s gonna be fine, but …” Scott took a breath and looked over your shoulder at Liam. “She can’t really talk.”

“Then it’s over, isn’t it?” Liam asked. He was so upset when you turned to look at him that he looked ready to punch a wall. But he kept himself still. “There’s nothing we can do to save him.”

Scott’s phone vibrated and you frowned at him. “What’s wrong?” you asked.

“I’ve got two voicemails from Kira,” Scott mumbled. “Give me a second.”

He walked away to take his call and you turned back to Liam. “I’m sorry, biscuit,” you said gently. As you sat down next to him, you took his hand in yours. “We’ll figure something out. You know we’re not going to give up on him.”

“Thanks,” Liam said with a small smile. It was probably all he could muster up at the time. You didn’t want to pretend that you knew what he was going through, so you just held his hand.

When Scott turned back around, he walked over quickly. “Get up,” he said.

“Why?” Liam asked.

“Because I’ve got an idea,” Scott said. “And because this isn’t over.”

“What’s your idea?” you asked. Scott got his goofy smile on his face like he knew what you were going to say when he was done explaining. Rightfully so, because as soon as he was done, you said, “This is the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard.”

“I know,” Scott said with a smile. “Come on.”

You and Liam followed Scott to Lydia’s room where you waited for Melissa to bring the cortisone shot. It was an awful wait but you were glad to see Lydia again. She couldn’t talk but you braided her into a bad replica of one of her signature braids. You’d just finished when your mom came in with Stiles behind her.

“Lydia, this is going to have to be just between us, since I can get fired for it,” Mel said in her gentlest voice.

“It’s a cortisone shot,” Scott explained in his alpha voice. It made you wonder if you had a voice like they did. “It’s gonna bring the inflammation down.”

Lydia nodded and Mel prepped the shot. She took the bandage off Lydia’s neck and you dropped your gaze. You weren’t the only one who was squeamish.

“Oh, yeah, okay. I’m gonna need to leave,” Stiles said awkwardly. You grabbed his hand to keep him in place and gave him a look. “Okay, fine. I’m not leaving, but I still might faint.”

“I’ll catch you,” you teased quietly. You squeezed his hand and reached for Lydia’s hand with your other. And then Liam fainted.

“Okay, Lydia, this is going to hurt like a bitch,” Mel said, ignoring the passed out teenage boy at her feet. She held Lydia’s chin in her hand and put the needle in her neck before anyone could change their minds.

Lydia started gasping and squeezing your hand. It was over quickly but she winced with every movement she made. Still, she managed to get dressed and stand through the elevator ride without complaint.

“Okay, I’ll get Malia,” Stiles said when you all stepped off the elevator. “Text me when you guys find Parrish.”

Scott handed Lydia off to you and rushed behind Stiles. “Hold on,” he said, pulling something out of his jacket and handing it to Stiles. The talons.

Lydia mumbled something and you tried to zone out of Scott and Stiles’ conversation to focus on her. You asked if she was okay as you and Liam kept walking with her to the parking lot. You hadn’t gotten much further by the time Scott and Stiles finished, but when they were done Stiles came rushing up to you guys. He pressed a quick kiss to your temple and you made him promise to be safe.

You couldn’t help but laugh as he dashed off again, and you caught Lydia smiling at you when you were done. “What?”

“I told you when you got back that he was crazy about you,” she said, voice barely there.

You rolled your eyes and nudged her lightly as you walked. “Let’s get through tonight and then you can tell me you told me so all you want, okay?”

---

The electricity crackled through the tunnels as the four of you raced around trying to find the Beast. It was concerning, but everything in these tunnels was concerning. And wet. One of the pipes must have burst but you couldn’t hear a leak anywhere.

“Scott?” Liam whispered as he came to a stop. “Do you hear that?”

“I heard that,” Lydia said.

“Lydia, save your voice,” Scott told her.

Liam looked down at the ground. He lifted his foot and the water sloshed around him. “Hey … Lydia, get out of here!” He shoved Lydia out of the puddle as electricity coursed through the water.

Up until then, you’d never been electrocuted. It felt like something was eating away at your insides, burning you up from the inside out. And if that wasn't enough, Liam and Scott were screaming which made it impossible to focus on anything.

Theo stepped out of the shadows, said sorry to Lydia, and then picked her up and threw her down one of the shafts in the tunnel. You scrambled to get closer but it was like there were needles in each of your muscles. Scott barely got there in time to catch her. Then Theo sank his claws into Scott.

“Feel that, Scott?” Theo asked. “Kanima venom.” He killed Tracy. There’s no other way he could have her power. And if he was the one that electrocuted you, then Josh was dead too. “Just let it happen. Let it go.”

You reached down to get Lydia but your arm was too short. You were half hanging down the empty shaft to reach her. Theo kicked you out of the way and you almost fell in.

“Let everything go.”  

“No!” Scott yelled. His grip had to be fading by now. Lydia was screaming as she struggled.

And then she fell.

The Beast growled in the distance as Theo straightened himself out. “You hear that?” he asked. “That’s the sound of real power.”

Your heart raced as Theo left. You couldn’t think. Lydia wasn’t supposed to get hurt. You scrambled over to Scott to make sure he was okay but it didn’t feel right.

“Scott, I need to find her,” you said. “She- she’s not like us. She could be dead.”

“Go,” Scott said. “Liam and I will handle Theo. You need to go find Lydia, alright?”

You mustered up a nod as you got to your feet. “Alright.”

You started running but everything in the tunnels looked the same. Frustratingly, you realized you might have had a better chance at finding Lydia if you’d jumped down the damn grate that Theo pushed her down. You were about to give up and your search and give that plan a try when you caught her scent. It was mingled with fear, but that only made it stronger.

You had to be right on top of Lydia when you saw someone coming out of the shadows. You threw them against the wall without thinking, and then they pinned you and pressed a blade to your throat.

“Nice sword,” you said a little breathlessly.

Kira smiled as she let go of you. “Thanks. Sorry, I’m a little late.”

“You’re right on time.” Something pounded a little further down the tunnel and you shared a look. “I’m saving Lydia. Do you want to help or find Scott?”

“Help first. Boyfriend later,” Kira said with a nod. The two of you ran to the door that Lydia was hitting and Kira cut it straight off the hinges before you had the chance to do anything. She smiled at a very freaked out looking Lydia. “Sorry, I’m late.”

“I’m just glad you made it,” Lydia said. Her voice was getting stronger. It gave you hope.

With renewed energy, you grabbed Lydia’s hand and the three of you started running through the tunnels. It was easier to find the others this time; you were stronger when you had your friends with you. Plus, once you were close enough, it was easier to track them by sound than by scent. The others could hear them too so you didn’t have to stop as much to pull them in the right direction.

You got there just as Scott fell to the floor, blood dripping down his neck.

It took Lydia a moment to catch her breath. The cortisone shot must have been wearing off by now. “Mason?” Her voice was stronger than before but all it did was get Sebastien’s attention.

Sebastien turned to face her and scowled. He started walking closer, each step echoing off the tunnel walls.

“I think you’re gonna need to try it a little louder,” Kira said, reaching for Lydia's hand and backing up slightly.

Sebastien’s eyes started glowing as he stalked closer. The shadows wrapped around him, and he started transforming into the Beast when Lydia took a breath and steadied herself.

When she opened her mouth again, it didn't sound like her banshee scream. It ricocheted in your skull all the same, but this was focused. Under the weight of her voice, the Beast started to crumble. The shadows appeared once more and then Mason fell through. The only reason he didn’t hit the floor was that Corey materialized to catch him at the last second.

But there were still shadows.

The Beast wasn’t materializing like it used to. Instead, it was wailing as it drifted through the tunnels. You thought it was going to disappear when Parrish managed to grab hold of it.

Scott got himself together and threw the cane at the Beast like a javelin.

The second the metal pierced the shadows, the shrieking got louder. The Beast was engulfed in blue-white light, being torn apart from the inside out, until Parrish stood alone in the tunnel. His flames went out.

“Is everyone okay?” Scott asked as everyone caught their breath.

“Not everyone!” Theo growled. He was covered in electricity, and he was pissed.

“Jesus Christ, what is it gonna take for you to die?” you asked, storming closer and shifting. There was no way you were going to let another one of your friends get hurt because of him.

Theo had other plans. He gathered all his electricity in his hand and shot a bolt of lightning at you. It probably would have killed you if Kira hadn’t jumped in front of you and used her sword to absorb the power.

“The Skinwalkers have a message for you, Theo,” she said, sounding more sure of herself than you'd ever heard before. The electricity stopped as Theo faltered. “Your sister wants to see you.”

Kira shoved her sword - still glowing from the lightning - into the ground. The concrete cracked in harsh lines towards Theo before opening up at his feet. Two very demonic looking hands clawed their way out of the hole and Tara stood up.

It was eerily silent as she grabbed at him and started pulling him down. The silence was broken by Theo’s screams.

“Scott, help me!” He grabbed at the concrete as his sister pulled him under. “No! No! Scott, help me! Please!”

And then he disappeared. The ground closed up behind him.  

“Woah,” you whispered. Sure, you were ready to kill him a minute ago, but now that he was gone … your heart broke a little bit. He sounded so scared at the end. You forced yourself to remember all the awful things he’d done and the fact that he was going to kill you, too, to keep from crying. Instead of unpacking all those emotions, you said. “I hate this place. Can someone give me a ride to check on Malia and Stiles?”

---

“It’s not that bad.”

“You had glass in your chest.”

“I got better.”

“You’re lucky we’re in a hospital so I can’t kick your ass.”

“Oh, I’d like to see you try,” Stiles said, throwing his empty jello cup in the trash can a few feet away. “Physically, yeah, you could totally kick my ass. But emotionally? That’ll wreck you.”

“You might have a point,” you said begrudgingly as you fixed his blankets. There was a bandage just above his heart, poking out of the hospital gown. You forced yourself to stop staring at it and look him in the eye. “Plus, then I’d have to break in another boyfriend and that would be a real hassle.”

“Please, you could have house trained Liam in the time it took for us to go out on a date,” Stiles said as he rolled his eyes. He smiled as you laughed at his bad joke, taking your hand in his and holding it against his chest. You’d have given anything to know exactly what he was thinking.

But telepathy wasn’t one of your powers, and that look on his face was making you irrationally nervous. You’d known that face all your life. You’d been dating that face for almost a year. That face had no business making you nervous.

“You know, the winter formal is coming up,” you blurted out. You had near-instantaneous regrets, but you couldn’t stop yourself. “Your back and chest should be healed by then and even if they’re not-”

Stiles made no attempt to hide the annoyingly smug grin on his face. “Are you asking me to the winter formal?”

“No,” you said defensively. You pulled your hand back and started picking at your nails. After having Stiles watch you squirm for an uncomfortable amount of time, you added, “I mean … do you want to go? To the formal, I mean.”

“God, no. I hate parties,” Stiles said. You felt ready to crawl into a hole and die. Of course, he didn’t want to go - school dances were a socially anxious nightmare. “But-” Stiles reached out for your hands and pulled them away from your face “-I would love to go to the dance with you. Assuming you’re asking me to go with you.”

You were quiet as you looked at him. While Stiles was still riding the high of making you nervous, he was being sincere. He’d go to the dance if you wanted to. “Really?” you asked quietly.

“Really,” Stiles repeated with a smile. He ran his thumbs across your hands gently. “You wanna go to the winter formal?”

“With you?”

“With me.”

You pretended to think about it for a moment. “You’ll get me a corsage that matches the flower in your lapel?”

Stiles leaned in as much as he could without hurting his chest. “I’ll even wear a tie,” he said.

You leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. “Then it’s a date.”

Tagged: @ietss​  @used-avocado​

[golbrocklovely]

just a distraction // sam golbach

requested by anonymous: I don't know if u also write about Sam, I hope u do, and if u do, can u write an imagine about Sam and the reader chilling in his room (Sam is not dating Kat) and they get into a deep conversation which ends up with a hot make out session?

A/N: I haven't done a Sam one shot ever so I'm excited for this. Hopefully this is what you wanted, anon! And please feel free to request Sam (even tho he's taken). There's not enough Sam love going around and I will gladly be the supply for it lol LMK what you think :) and obviously in this story Sam and Kat aren't together/never met.

trigger warning: cursing????, fluff, light smut

word count: 1352

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I laid my head back against the head rest of my seat. I was parked outside my best friend's apartment, considering not going up to see him. I had called him an hour ago, telling him I was upset with something that just happened and that I really needed to vent. He said I could come over. But now, sitting outside his place... I felt like maybe I was being a burden, or just too over-dramatic.

I felt my phone vibrate in my hand. I glanced down at it, seeing a message pop up.

Sam: are you almost here?

I smiled, opening the message and responding.

Y/N: yeah. just pulled in. heading up now.

I got out of my car, and walked to the entrance of his place, buzzing up to him. The door clicked open and I walked through the lobby and to the elevator. I clicked the fourth button and went to his floor. I followed the hallway down to his place, knocking on his door twice.

The door swung open, revealing Sam with a light smile on his face. He was in red sweatpants and a white t-shirt.

"Hey Y/N. Come in." He moved to the side, allowing me through.

I walked in and went to his couch, sitting down lazily. Sam chuckled at my expression as he changed his LED lights to a soft pink color.

He sat down next to me, his legs crossed on the couch. "So... what's wrong?"

"Hayden." I mumbled.

Sam rolled his eyes. "What did he do now?"

"Let me show you." I hissed.

I pulled out my phone and went to Instagram. I scrolled to the picture and handed my phone to Sam.

"I think he's trying to win an award for 'worst ex ever'." I groaned.

Sam stared down at my phone, a confused look on his face. "Isn't that your friend Sarah?"

"Yep. And she's making out with Hayden. At the Santa Monica Pier. Which is where our first date was." I scoffed.

"'like i would miss you lol'..." Sam mumbled, reading the caption.

“I blocked him on everything, only for him to show up on Sarah's page. I love that for me.” I smiled sarcastically.

“Why is she with him?” Sam asked.

“Who knows? All I know is she was one of the only people that knew how much of a shit he was to me the whole time we dated. And yet she's with him. I was gonna call her but I'm too upset to do it. I'll probably just curse her out and look like a fucking crazy person.” I sighed.

Sam shook his head. “No. You're not crazy for being upset. You have every right to be pissed off. This is low of him and her.”

“I just thought I was over him…” I insisted quietly.

“You guys were together for a year. Give yourself some time.” He replied.

“I don't think I’m just upset at this, though. I'm also upset that nothing got resolved. I told him how much he hurt me and his response was 'well break up with me then'. And I did. I don't regret doing that. I'm just annoyed that he never apologized.” I explained, fidgeting with my rings.

“He's a douche.” Sam jeered.

I nodded. “More than that. He always made me feel like I was crazy. When we were alone together, it was always lovey-dovey and cutesy. And then the second we would be with my friends or his, he would go and make fun of me, make me look like a joke. I never understood why he did that. And I never will.”

Sam turned his body towards me, resting his elbow on the top of the couch. “Y/N, can I be honest with you?”

“Sure.” I responded.

“I've known you for a long time. And I hate to be the one to tell you this, but... you really suck at getting good boyfriends. Or even flings.” He informed hesitantly.

I squinted my eyes at him. “Thanks, Sam.”

He sighed, knowing I was upset. “No. Listen. I'm saying you fall for the wrong guys. You fall for every guy so quickly and then get your heart broken because they were jerks the whole time and you just ignored that side of them.”

“Not every one of them has been that bad.” I remarked.

He shrugged. “No, but not every one of them treated you right. Hayden was the last guy you should have ended up with.”

My body mimicked his, turning me so we were face-to-face. “Why didn't you say something before?”

“Because... you seemed happy. It wasn't until you came over breaking down and telling me how much you hated being with him that I finally realized you weren't.” He stated.

“Who do you think I should be with?” I questioned.

“I think you need to be with someone that knows the real you. That cares about you and would tell everyone that. That isn't afraid to show you off.” He answered.

“So... the opposite of Hayden?” I joked.

Sam chuckled. “Duh.”

I paused for a second. “Maybe you're right.”

“I think I am.” Sam smirked, as I giggled quietly.

When my gaze landed back on him, he was staring into my eyes. Our eyes locked, and I was suddenly aware of how close he was to me, our legs touching each other. My heart beat picked up its pace. My nerves shot through me, making me feel hot.

Why was I feeling this way?

Sam glanced down at my mouth, and quickly leaned in, pecking my lips. The kiss was fast, almost too quick.

He swallowed hard as he pulled away. A light blush rose to his face, hardly noticeable with the pink lighting. "Um... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have... done that."

“No, it's okay. I-I... didn't hate it.” I muttered.

He cut me off, only realizing what I said. “I don't know why I did that. I - wait what?”

“What? Was I supposed to hate it?” I laughed.

“Uh, no. I guess.” His eyes came back to mine for a moment. “You're not weirded out?”

“By you kissing me? No. It was a nice… distraction.” I trailed off.

“Right...” Sam uttered.

We sat there awkwardly in silence. I stared at the floor, focusing on a piece of carpet. Sam picked at his couch, running his nails up and down it. All that could be heard was our breathing, which made mine almost speed up.

“Do you want me to keep distracting you?” His voice was deep and calm.

I turned my head back to Sam, his head already facing me. I could feel my eyes drift down to Sam’s lips. I wasn’t opposed to kissing Sam. I never really thought about me and him together, but I don’t think I would hate it. We had been friends for such a long time, and a lot of our friends always joked about us being together.

Maybe I was getting too caught up in it all. Besides, like he said, it was just a distraction.

I nodded at him, biting my lip.

The energy in the room felt electric. I could feel my heart in my throat as Sam closed the gap between us. As his lips landed on mine, I sighed deeply.

Sam wrapped his arms around me, pulling me as close to him as he could get me. He lightly bit my lip, sliding his tongue in as I gasped. My hands glided up his stomach, gripping his shirt tightly. I threw one of my legs over his lap, trying to get closer to him.

One of his hands slithered down my thigh, causing a light moan to escape my lips. Sam pulled me into his lap, my legs wrapping around him and straddling his hips.

Sam grunted against our kiss as I pressed myself down onto him. His hand slid into my hair, gently yanking my head back. His lips moved to my now exposed neck, nipping and sucking on my skin.

His mouth stopped at my ear, whispering. “Just a distraction, huh.”

[thorne93]

History Repeats (Part 3)

Prompt: Life’s hard, right? Well throw in a not so great job, a broken heart, and chasing a pipe dream in LA. But could someone come along to make all the bad shit disappear? Or is he just another heartbreak waiting around the bend?

Warnings: language, drug addiction, alcohol addiction, angst/heartbreak, adult themes (??)

Word Count: 2318

Note: Aesthetic made by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo because she’s absolutely amazing Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo . Brainstorming from @carryonmyswansong​

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your friends had asked you to come out, but you just weren’t feeling up to it, and since your friends shared the same stomping ground as you and Jason, you were afraid you’d run into him. Not to mention, more often than not, your friends were Jason’s as well, you hung out in the same crowd, and now that you’d broken up, you maybe had two friends that weren’t his friends when you met. Maybe he was right, maybe you really were a hermit.

No matter, you weren’t going to apologize for wanting to stay home, or in this case, for tonight, not wanting to go out. You were perfectly content just being at home, alone…

For the past few days, you couldn’t help but think constantly of Hayden. It wasn’t that he was an actor, that fact hardly ever made an appearance in your mind. No, you were more mesmerized with...him. He was so funny and quiet, and sweet. You two seemed to see eye to eye on a few things so far and it was really nice. It was a breath of fresh air. 

You and Jason disagreed on a lot. For the longest time, you thought it was just small stuff, like what sets of plates to buy, which way to arrange the living room. But when you broke up...it didn’t hurt quite as bad as you thought it would, which surprised you. You thought you loved Jason, maybe you did at one point, but the truth was, at the end of the day, neither of you agreed on the big things, and for you, that was major. For most people it should be. People should want to be with rather like minded people when it comes to kids, futures, how to live your lives. And that just wasn’t there for you and Jason. 

Didn’t mean you weren’t sad to lose a relationship though, you still cared for Jason, he lived with you, and you shared your lives. Of course ending that chapter of your life hurt, and you sometimes wished it didn’t end at all...But the part in you that could see past the current tumultuous situation, knew that things ending with Jason was for the best. 

Which brought you back to Hayden. Rachel seemed to share some of the same issues that Jason had, at least when it came to how they see you and Hayden. Perhaps...perhaps that meant something. 

Your shift was winding down, your thoughts filled with Hayden and hopes of getting to talk to him again, because your friends clearly didn’t get that you weren’t in the mood to go out and be social right now. Only one of them had asked you how you were doing after the breakup, and even that was only one time. Since then, they hadn’t checked in on you or checked how you were. Maybe trying to invite you out was a way of distracting you, but if it was, it was a poor attempt on their part, and they should know by now you didn’t work like that.

Standing at the front counter, ready to take any late check ins, you were going through the schedule for tomorrow, when Hayden came gliding into the lobby, but you didn’t see him. He nearly passed the front desk but his desire to talk to you got the better of him.

“Hey,” his voice suddenly greeted as you were bent over. 

Your heart filled with warmth as you heard his voice. You raised your head to face him. “Oh, hey, you’re coming in late,” you noted. Typically, you’d caught glances of him in the lobby heading to his room around six or seven at night, not at nearly eleven. “Out partying?” you half-teased with a smile.

“Oh yeah, you know me. Total party animal,” he responded with his own grin. 

You laughed in response. 

“Hey, I was dropping by to see if maybe you would...want to hang out when you get off?” he asked. “Normally, I wouldn’t bother you. I’m sure you want to go home and relax...It’s just...I sort of...would like someone to talk to,” he said, shrugging and appearing nervous, and a touch sad. 

You nodded. “Yeah, of course. No, yeah, I’d love to hang out. Where would you want to go?” you inquired. A small bout of guilt hit your stomach as you realized you blew off your other friends, but Hayden asked and you jumped at the opportunity. But...in this case, it was different. He seemed sad and you wanted to be there for him.

“I was wondering if maybe we could just go to my room? I’m a little...exhausted from being out all day,” he remarked, hoping you understood.

You nodded, fully understanding how draining being out and about socially can be. 

“Yeah, that’s fine. I’ll be up there after a bit,” you said, smiling a friendly smile at him.

“Cool. See you up there,” he said before knocking on the desk and walking off to the elevators. Watching him walk away gave you a strange feeling. You had this desire to walk with him, to be by his side. His presence made you feel so...calm, and steady. Jason never truly made you feel at ease, and being around Hayden, you realized that now. In fact, none of your friends did. You felt that you always had to be fully engaged, fully “on” to be around them. Not with Hayden.

Now, you had something to look forward to after work, and the first time you’d looked forward to anything in a long time. A smile was plastered widely on your lips for the rest of your shift, and when you got off, you gathered your things and made your way to the sixth floor, heading to his suite.

After one knock, he opened the door, grinning from ear to ear, clad in a black sweater and dark blue jeans, looking incredibly handsome. 

“I’m so glad you came,” he said, stepping aside. 

You nodded, walking into the room. 

“Yeah! I’m looking forward to us talking again,” you confessed.

“Me too. Uh, we can sit here if you want,” he said, gesturing to the living room suite that held a couch and two chairs and a coffee table.

You nodded, setting your stuff down and out of the way before sitting on the couch.

“You want something to drink or are you hungry or anything?” Hayden offered, as he walked over to the small bar in the room.

“Actually, uh, yeah I wouldn’t mind something to drink, and maybe eat. I didn’t get a lunch break today and forgot to grab something before my shift,” you said, a little embarrassed, causing a blush to rise to your cheeks.

“No problem. I’m starving. Care if I order room service?”

“Not at all.”

“Cool. What would you like? They have salmon, steak, burgers...Oh, hell,” he said, laughing as he threw back his head, letting the menu rest in his hands. “Look who I’m telling,” he remarked. “Sorry about that,” he apologized.

“No need to apologize for being considerate,” you said with a smile. “But I think I know what I’ll have,” you said, ordering your favorite grilled cheese from them. It had three types of cheese, sauteed onions, and the bread was always perfect. You got a cup of tomato soup on the side and a coke. 

After he ordered, he came over and sat down on the couch, a cushion between you two. 

“So how was your day?” he inquired kindly.

“Not too bad, actually,” you said truthfully, nodding, thankful that it was easy. “Typical day. Steady pace. No crazy guests,” you said with a laugh, which he returned.

“That’s good,” he said with a smile.

“You? How was your day?” 

“Same. We reshot the same scene about fifty times though,” he informed, feigning frustration.

“Oh, I didn’t know you were here for a film,” you informed, surprised. 

“That’s the business,” he reminded with a sideways smile.

“Ah! Yes, you did say you were here on business, I forgot. Then I didn’t put two and two together,” you remarked, laughing a bit at yourself. “That’s really cool though! Do you like this project?”

He smiled, a light behind it, he seemed amused at your question and you couldn’t decipher why.

You slightly laughed as you asked, “What?” 

“Well, typically, people ask me what it’s about, when they can see it, who I play, how much I’m making...You know, sort of superficial questions. I’ve never had anyone ask me if I like the work I’m doing though. So thank you for asking that.” 

You nodded, not thinking anything of it. That was a normal response for you. You cared more if people were happy, rather than what they were doing.

“But to answer your question,” he continued, shifting gears, “yes, I do like it. It feels very different from what I’ve done in the past and I really like that. I’m always trying to push myself and challenge myself, so having this new role is really amazing, to me at least.”

“I get that,” you agreed. “I’m a singer--well, a struggling singer--but I try to constantly hit new notes, sing in tones I’ve never done before. I try to do Christmas songs to blues songs to lounge songs, to pop songs...I am all over the map,” you said with a laugh.

“Oh you sing? That’s a really cool talent to have. My ass can’t sing to save my life,” he remarked. 

You shrugged. “It’s not for everyone. I used to think that anyone could sing, if they tried, but after working with a lot of friends and offering lessons and such over the years, it’s not the case.”

“I bet. Same as acting. I’ve met a lot of people that I thought, ‘Sure they can do this’...Then we start working and...it’s not there. Sometimes it’s just something someone has.”

“Yep, definitely,” you agreed. “So did something happen at work that upset you or…?” you questioned and he frowned slightly at you, so you elaborated. “You said you needed someone to talk to…”

“Ah, right,” he noted, leaning forward. “Well, I guess it’s just...all the shit surrounding this breakup. Being in this city, seeing places we used to go while we were filming or visiting each other. Like, I saw this ice cream shop that I took Briar to when Rachel brought her while I was shooting.”

You nodded, listening to him.

“Or, like I saw this cool little pizza place that I took Rachel after we finished shooting Jumper,” he said, shrugging. 

“I know what you mean. Even just...being at my house now is a little stifling. I mean, I know at the end of the day, Jason and I weren’t meant for each other, but it still sucks to come home to an empty house. I look at it now, and I see the couch where we binged Punisher. Or the kitchen were we made so many meals and joked around.”

“Yeah,” he agreed quietly. “Yeah, shit like that just gets me. And of course, not seeing my daughter anymore. That’s really the worst. I just...I was with her every day of her life, and now I barely see here. It’s almost worst being here because she’s so close, but so far...ya know?”

“I think I do,” you agreed. “I can’t imagine how hard that is for you. I’m really sorry,” you offered, placing your hand on his knee.

“Thanks. I mean...I’m kind of like you, where, I know that Rachel and I are just two very different people. It took me a long time to realize that. I think I started seeing it while we were still together, and she definitely did. Then after the breakup it still took me awhile, but I’m starting to accept that.. She’s a socialite, she loves being around friends and being out and about, and I get that. That’s cool for her. But I just can’t stand the pressure of that shit and I prefer to be home, playing games, working. It probably sounds like a stupid reason to break up but--”

“No, it’s not,” you countered gently but firmly. “If two people aren’t right, then you aren’t right. You two deserve to do things you want with no pressure from the other to conform.”

“Some people might argue that you should compromise, if you really love them,” he challenged.

You shook your head. “Compromise is getting Chinese for dinner instead of pizza, or going with the cheaper china set than the one you really wanted because you just can't afford it right now, or choosing gray because you want black and they want blue. It’s not one person saying ‘I’ll stay home forever because you want it’ or ‘I’ll go to every event because it’ll make you feel better.”

“But wouldn’t the compromise be for me to go to some events and for her to stay home sometimes?” 

You shrugged. “In that case, it’s sort of picking your battles, right? Well, how do you pick your battles. Let’s say she wanted to go to a wedding this month, so you go, but next month, there’s a baby shower that you don’t want to go to, but she really wants to go. Now, you’ve done her a favor, it’s time she did you one, but it probably wouldn’t turn out that way.”

He slightly smiled, amused. “You make this sound like prison. You get time to do this, but not this,” he said, gesturing with his hands from one imaginary thing to the other.

You shook your head. “No, not at all. But if we go with your idea that it should be a compromise then you’re sort of limited. Let’s say you go to everything she wants to go out and do; drinks with friends, shopping, a house warming party, whatever. Let’s say you go to all of those, what do you get out of it? How do we make Hayden happy?” you asked rhetorically.

He shrugged in response. 

“You leave early. Instead of spending two, three, four hours, you spend an hour and a half and leave,” you suggested. 

“But then it almost feels pointless,” he added. 

“Exactly. In your case, there’s not going to be a clean, even way to make sure everyone’s happy. You toss a coin, figuring out when to go or stay or you sacrifice both of your happinesses by cutting it short for her, but making it end for you.”

“You make it sound so...cut and dry,” he retorted. 

“Do you see any other option?” you challenged.

Of course, though, he didn’t. How could he? If he saw a different option, he would’ve done it. He would’ve exhausted his resources, you could tell. You hadn’t known Hayden long, or knew him well, but he seemed like a man who cared, and cared deep. You didn’t feel like he would give up without a fight, especially if his daughter is involved. 

“No,” he sighed truthfully. 

“Precisely my point. You either both compromise so much neither one is happy, or you just...let each other go. It sucks, it hurts like hell no matter how logical it is, but...sadly, that’s life.” You shrugged, watching him as he listened to you.

He bobbed his head in agreement. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”

“Unfortunately, I am most of the time,” you said with a bit of a laugh. His gaze slid to yours, trying to give you a look of “give me a break” but he failed and started to chuckle.

Just then, the room service arrived. Hayden let them in and you two sat your things on the coffee table and you were about to dive in when Hayden asked you if you wanted to watch TV. You said sure and he turned it on some random sitcom you’d never seen before, but it was enjoyable. 

After your dinner, you had started to talk about the show that was playing and you two had segwayed into other shows and movies you liked. Come to find out, you had rather similar tastes, but at some points you butted heads and debated key points to movies. He thought some were superficial, you thought they were deep and moving. You thought some were just over stimulated guy flicks, and he said they were well thought out heist films. 

At some point, you’d started talking about Great Gatsby and if he’d read the book. He said he had, and that sparked more discussion on books versus film, then you started simply talking books and you two didn’t overlap too much there, but it was still fascinating to hear what he reads. As well, he seemed to be intrigued by your choice of books as well.

The entire evening felt so relaxed, and fun, and no pressure to impress him, or to agree with him like you had with Jason. With Jason, if you disagreed, he tried to make you see his point, but he went about it in a way that made you feel stupid and uneducated. He made you feel bad for having your opinion, if it was somehow wrong. You didn’t think he did it on purpose, but by the end of your conversations with him, you couldn’t help but feel that way.

Even with friends you felt this way. Your friends always seemed like they needed constant entertainment, something new and exciting, something to gab about, instead of just...chilling. Not Hayden. 

You left around three in the morning and headed home, feeling so warm, and happy for the first time in a long time, and you didn’t want that feeling to go away anytime soon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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History Repeats:

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[mitchmarner]

i too am loving all the mitch content... if you want to break up the photos, what are your three favorite things about him ?? :)

This ask never showed up on my mobile app so I didn’t see this until I logged into desktop but I’m so grateful to be asked this question, even if it’s cruel to choose three. Shit is about to get cheesy. Disclaimer that when I speak about something as fact, it’s just me assuming these things about him because I do not know him or what he’s like, I can only observe from what others who do know him say and from content of him over the years. 

I really hope for everyone’s sanity that the read more works.

1.) The effect he has on everyone else and the position he fills on the team. I mean, besides the iconic JT quote about sometimes loving Mitch but sometimes wanting to punch him, it’s been made pretty evident by the rest of his teammates that he is so integral to their culture and bringing up everyone else around him. He always seems like he’s hyped up on 12 espresso shots and 4 handfuls of sugar and he spreads that around to everyone else. I just expect a shot of Mitch doing a really embarrassing dance in the dressing room in every single Blueprint video. Also you have him singing in the background of Zach’s interview without no reservations and he’s just pretty shamelessly himself at all times. He just seems like the kind of guy who can sit down with you and have a conversation as if you’ve known him for 12 years. He’s so easygoing; in my mind (because obviously I don’t know him to say this) he comes across as being pretty simple with what he needs to make him happy. He really loves hockey and playing for the Leafs, he loves being around his family and Steph and Zeus and his friends, and it just seems like he was blessed with a “why would I ever be sad when I have good friends and like my job?” mindset. He’s so good at passing along the ease and lightheartedness to everyone else.

2.) He’s really good at back-and-forth like he’s so funny just in watching him have conversations with people. We most often just get to see him in pre/post-games in which everyone is a robot because saying anything even remotely interesting in front of Toronto media starts shit, but in the videos where you do get to see him actually being himself without the pressure of a giant media scrum asking the same 5 questions, he’s so interesting. His Leaf to Leafs are so great (his one with Patty makes me want to cry and his one with Matt makes me laugh out loud- the peak example of how I imagine a lot of his conversations go is that banter about bringing a house to the island). I also ADORE this video of him. Every video of him in the Leafs chel tournament is really funny and he goes so hard. There’s so many moments of him being quick-witted and throwing out a funny side comment (I really love the Cabbie video from World Juniors where he mocks Dylan).

3.) He seems like a genuinely good person. He kinda wears his heart on his sleeve. Mitch is such an intentionally carefree and energetic person that when he becomes genuine, it really stands out. His relationship with Hayden was really beautiful, and I’m not going to expand on that in such a casual forum like this ask, but I will link the postgame where he talks about her in the end because he spoke very eloquently and meaningfully, and this older article about them. He cares about people and he cares what people think of him - not in a self-absorbed way, but in a way that he wants to be the best person he can be, and he very seriously considers the way people around him perceive him as a reflection of himself. I’ve never heard a bad word about the way he treats people - I remember in one SDP episode, they were talking about how loved Mitch is in Toronto and Steve said that someone around the Leafs confirmed what lots of others who work around the Leafs (media, insiders, whoever) say, which is that Mitch is genuinely really kind to every single person he meets. I really like the saying about who you are as a person can be displayed in how you treat people that can do nothing for you, and by all available accounts of people who have interacted with Mitch, he’s respectful and kind to everyone he meets.

4.) Screw the rules, I’m doing 4. I can’t just not address his hockey. There’s a really great Athletic article I don’t feel like finding the link to at the moment that is about him in general but details how hard-working he is and how he brings trainers on vacation and how on New Year’s Eve when the Leafs were in I think Vegas, Mitch was working out with a trainer rather than being out partying (I mean, I’m sure he went out and partied after, but the point being that he didn’t until he put in the work for hockey first). You don’t make it into the NHL by not putting in the work, but his dedication is always admirable. But more importantly, watching Mitch play hockey is amazing. He’s always a few plays ahead of everyone else, and his highlights are the kinds that you could show to someone who has never watched hockey and they’ll be really drawn in. It’s so funny watching really old highlight reels of him when he’s like 13 or 14 and he’s this tiny force showing up everyone else on the ice. This article where it says Mitch was a year younger than his teammates in peewee and 85 pounds compared to one of his teammates, who was over a foot taller and 160 pounds, and those were the kinds of guys Mitch was on the ice against… I have thoughts about that. I know everyone jokes now about Mitch being small but even though he has a small frame, he really isn’t short/skinny compared to other guys in the league and he’s filled out a lot, but it’s crazy to know how much hockey he went through where he was just set up to be killed on the ice. It’s cool to watch old videos of him absolutely slicing through these giant guys because he doesn’t have to be scared of their hits, since his skating and puck skills are a billion times better. His dekes and creative playmaking were why I started paying so much attention to him in the first place, and I just want to watch him work on skills all day. It’d be so cool seeing what he’s capable of considering what he can do in a time-sensitive, high-paced game (my Mitch for the ASG hopes are definitely non-existent for the season with his slower start and now being out until December, but next year please). There's a lot more I could say, but I just really appreciate a lot of really good qualities he has. Plus, I love the frog in his mouth and dumb red bull hats and I love listening to him talk because he has a really nice voice.

[doomdays-a]

common  misconceptions  about  tracy.

these  are  just  a  few  thinks  that  have  irked  me  when  digging  in  the  deep,    dark  depths  of  tracy’s  tag  and  sometimes  in  some  threads  with  people  over  the  last  year   (  +  )   that  i’ve  been  writing  tracy,         and  i  understand  how  easy  it  is  to misread  a  character if  you’re  not  studying  them  personally   /    don’t  care  as  much  about  them  as  the  ones  who  are  writing  them,       so  i  don’t  blame  anyone  for  it    —–     but  this  is  a  character  who  gets  a  lot  of mindless  hate,      a  lot  of  it  stemming  from   the  fact  that  people  just  didn’t  care  to  try  to  understand  her when  she  was  on  the  show.        i  respect  that  our  opinions  may  not  align,       but  i  needed  to  write  all  of  this  out  for  people  to  understand  where  i  stand  on  all  of  it.      i’ll  also  link  all  metas  relating  to  these  misconceptions.

tracy  was  a  lovesick  girl  obsessed  with  theo  and  making  him  her  boyfriend.        

yes,    tracy  loved  theo,      but  in  ways  that  needed  no romantic  connotations.       she  was  loyal  because  she  had  NOTHING  before  theo.       he  offered  her  guidance  that  she  had  been  searching  for all  her  life.       without  a  mother  for  most  of  her  life    +     a  father  who  only  gave  her  attention  when  he  had  to,        she  needed  someone  to help  mentor  her,      and  she  latched  onto  theo  quickly.       but  what  people  often  forget  is  that  tracy’s ��prominent  genetics  are  the  KANIMA.       kanimas  seek  masters,      someone  to guide  them,     someone  to  use  as  their  weapon  of  vengeance,         someone  to   give  them  orders.     it’s  why  theo  and  tracy  work  so  well  together     —–       theo  needs  people  who  are  willing  to  act  as  his  tool  to  get  what  he  wants.      tracy  is  willing  to  be  that  for  him  because  her  genetics pull  her  to  him,       making  everything  he  needs  a  priority.        tracy  NEVER  cared  about  having  a  boyfriend,       nor  did  she  care  about  being romantically  involved  with  theo.     that  was never  a  priority,      just  a  BONUS  between  them.      it  was  something  that  heightened  their  bond,       though  not  at  all  necessary  to  the  relationship.         it’s  important  to  remember  that  she  wasn’t  constantly  by  his  side  because  she  was too  obsessed  and  sickly  in  love  with  him,       but  because  she  RESPECTED  him  as  an  alpha,     a  master,    a  genuine  friend  and  the  FIRST  real  friend  she  has  ever  had,        and  as  a  LEADER.       her  idea  of   the  perfect  alpha  was  skewed;       she  believed  the  way  theo  behaved  was  the  way  alphas  were supposed  to  behave,      and  that  as  his  beta,      it  was her  responsibility  to  always  protect  him  and  put  him  before  herself,      in  every  situation.     being  LOYAL  doesn’t  mean  she  was simply  obsessed.  

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tracy  and  the  rest  of  the  pack  were  close.    

this  definitely  isn’t  true  on so  many  levels,      but  i’m  going  to  start  with  the  fact  that  it  was  IMPORTANT  to  this  entire  arc  that  this  pack  was  not  close.        to  insist   that  they  were  close  and  all  got  along  as  a  happy  family  as  scott’s  pack  did  is  to  totally  invalidate   what  really  happened  between  them  all.       theo  was  NOT  a  good  alpha   in  terms  of  how  he  treated  his  betas       (  despite  tracy’s  own  skewed  thoughts on  the  matter.   )     this  doesn’t  mean  they  didn’t  have  their  own  friendships      ——     josh  obviously  looked  out  for  corey,      hayden  and  corey  were  close,       hayden  cared  for  tracy  as  seen  once  she  found  her  dead  body  even  though  that  definitely wasn’t  reciprocated.       hayden  was  trying  to  be  part  of  the  pack  because  she  thought  that  was   what  she  had  to  do,      eventually  straying  and  joining  the  other  pack.       corey  was back  and  forth giving  insider   information  to  both  packs  and  tracy  could  see  that,      also  having  reason  not  to  trust  him  given  his  connection  to  mason.       tracy  didn’t  like  hayden  or  corey because  of  their  constant  back-and-forth  and  their  hesitance  to  trust  theo  immediately  as  she  did.       she  saw  them  as  weak    (    often,    unrightfully  so.    )

but   more  specifically,      i  want  to  talk  about  josh  as  i’ve  seen  so  many  edits,     imagines,    thoughts,    etc.    that  allude  to  the  fact  that  these  two  were  CLOSE.      while  they  were  seen  together  most,       that  doesn’t  mean  she  liked  him.      she  tolerated  him  because  he  was  the  only  one  of  the  pack  besides  her  who  seemed  to  be sticking  around,      but  more  often  than  not,      she  was  ANNOYED  with  him.         he second  guessed  theo,      he talked  back  to  him,      he  acted  ungrateful  for  what  he  had,      and  that  wasn’t  something  tracy  could  never  get  behind.      she  never  had  any  sort  of  respect  for  josh.      she  liked  him  BETTER  than  the  other  two in  the  pack,      but  that  didn’t  mean  she  enjoyed  his  presence.      this  is   especially  true  when  they  have  the  mask.       she  knows  josh  is  the  only  one  capable of  putting  it  on without  dying    ——    he  has  POWER  that  the  rest  don’t,     and  this  is  an  advantage  for  him.      it frustrates  her  that  he’s  not  taking  advantage  of  it,     especially  since  she’s  quick  to  use  her  own  newfound  powers  whenever  she  sees  the  opportunity.        this  is  a  real  opportunity  for  josh  to  help  the  pack  be  one  step  closer  to   their  overall  goal    (    an  in  general,     get  answers  that  they  can’t  find  elsewhere    )     and  he  refuses  to  help.      to  tracy,     this  makes  him  seem  disloyal  and  worthless  to  the  pack.    

i  don’t  know  what  it  is  that  makes  everyone  convinced  that  she  cared  about  josh  at  all,     but   i  think  the  scene  after  he  dies  is  one  of  her  most  misread  scenes  there  is.     i’ve  seen  a   lot  of  posts  about  how  she  was    ‘   obviously  so  broken  up  about  watching  him  die  ‘   but  i  will  continue  to  refute  this.      tracy  blindly  supports  theo  in  everything  he  does.       if  he  wants  one  of  their  pack  members  dead,     then  to  her,     that’s  something  that’s  necessary  and  beneficial  to  them.      she  TRUSTS  his  decisions;    he’s  her alpha,     she’s  made  to  believe  that  he  knows  what’s  best  for  all  of  them.      josh  had  just  literally  proved  himself  USELESS  to  the  pack  because  he  refused  to  do  the  one  thing  that  only  he  could  do  and  that  the  pack  desperately  needed.      what  does  theo  do  when  something  is  worthless  to  him?      he  gets  rid  of  it   ——-     that’s  something  tracy  has  picked  up  on  and  uses  herself.      her  reaction  to  josh’s  death  was  of  SURPRISE,     not  remorse.      she  was  surprised  it  happened  so  suddenly,     but  she didn’t  blame  theo for  doing  it.      they  needed  josh’s  power  and  if  josh  wasn’t  going  to  use  it  himself,      they  had  to  take  matters  into  their  own  hands,     which  is  exactly  what  theo  did.     “   he  was  small  and  inexperienced, ‘“   ——-    it  was  a  reminder  to  her  that  she  couldn’t  be  that.      it’s  a  WARNING  from  theo.      if  you’re  not  willing  to  oblige  by  theo’s  rules,     you  have  no  purpose in  this  pack    ——    and  the  last  thing  she  wanted  to  be  was  something  worthless  to  theo.     she  didn’t  respect  josh,      she  had  no  remorse  for  his  death,      and  she  thought  their  pack  was  better  off without  someone  who  was  so  willing  to  disobey  his  alpha.  

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tracy  and  her  dad  were  close   /   she  respected  her  father.

she  kills  him  that  night,       presumably  because  she  was  trying  to get  rid  of  everyone  who  was  trying  to  help  her     ———      but  there’s  more  to  look  at.       tracy  kills  her  father,   her  psychiatrist,      and  attempts  to  kill  her  guidance  counselor,     natalie  martin.       while  we  haven’t  seen  her  relationship    with  her  psychiatrist,       we  have  seen  the  very  POOR  attempts  that  natalie  and  her  father  had  given  to  try  to  help  her.        they  reduced  her  problems,      made  them  seem  as  if  they  were  nothing  to  worry  about  and  made  her  feel  as  if  she  were  simply  CRAZY  for  envisioning  and  feeling  the  things  she  felt  because  of  them.     natalie  reduced  it  to    ‘ common  anxiety  about  senior   year .  ‘        her  father  treated  it  as  if  it  was   ‘ just  a  dream ‘   and  that  it  was  ridiculous  that  she  needed  real  comfort  and  protection  at  night.      these  people  hadn’t  HELPED  HER,      they  only  made  her  feel  worse  about  herself  because  they  refused  to  accept  she  was  truly  struggling.       of  course,     the  dread  doctors  didn’t  want  anything  in  her  way  of becoming  the  monster  she  was  meant  to  be.      besides  her  father,      she  had  no  one  else.,   no  tie to  anyone  here.       by  controlling  her  and  manipulating  her  into  killing  him,    they  rid  her  of  any  ties  she  had  to  a NORMAL,    HUMAN  life,      so  they  could  take  over  and  be  her  master       (     and  after  she  fails,      it’s  theo  who  gets  to  take  over  that  title.   )    

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tracy  wanted  to  be  saved.

this  is  a  big  one    —–     one  that  i’ve  run  into  many  issues  with  when  it  comes  to  writing  with   others  who  want  to  save  tracy.       it’s  great  if  your  character wants  to  try,     it’s  very in  character for  many  of  the  canon  characters  on  this  show    ——      but  you  have  to  remember  that  tracy’s  mindset does  not  align with  theirs.         she  is  convinced  that  theo  was  the  one  doing  the  saving.       the  dread  doctors  don’t  give  much  room  for  chimeras  to be  saved,       they’re  doomed  FAILURES  and  that’s  all  there  is  to  it.      her  first  death  was  inevitable.      it’s  what  happens  after  she  comes  back  that  makes  this  important  to  note.     she  is  content  with  being  with  the  villain.     she  has  confidence,     she  has  power,      and  she’s  with  the  alpha  who  knows  MORE  about  what  they’re  up  against  than  scott  does.      not  to  mention,     she  knows  scott  and  his  pack  wanted  to  save  her  from  becoming  the  creature  she  is  now    ——-    which  would  only  take  away  everything  she  has  been  so  thankful  for,      so  she  believes  scott  would  have  RUINED  HER if  he  had  been  able  to   ‘   save  her.    ‘         while  other  members  in  the  pack  second  guess  theo  and  start  to  wonder  if  they’re  better  off  elsewhere,       everything  that  should  look  alarming  to  tracy  DOESN’T.        her  ideas  were  skewed;      she  believed  that  he  was  supposed  to  treat  his  pack  the  way  he  did  and  that  it  was  just  an  honor  to  be  able  to  work  alongside  him.        

this  often  leads  me  to  a  standstill  in  any  plot  where  your  character  wants  to  save  tracy  from  theo.      IT’S  IMPOSSIBLE.       you  can’t  convince  her  to  ever  turn  her  back  on  someone  who  she  is  genetically  connected  to  because  of  her  kanima  genes  +    someone  who  was giving  her  guidance  that  she  had  been  longing  for  all  her  life.      he  was  her  first  real  friend,      that  wasn’t  something  she  could  give  up.       while  i   never  mind  writing  this  out  because  it  IS  interesting  for  tracy  to  continue  that  fight,       you  have  to  understand  this  if  this  is  the  direction  your  character  intends  to  go   ——    they  can  try  to  save  tracy  if  it’s  in  their  nature  to  do  so,      but  she  won’t  oblige.      there  is  NO  WAY  to  change  her  mind,     unfortunately.  

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tracy  suddenly  becoming  cold  was  out  of  character   /    didn’t  make  sense.

i  can  understand  why  this  may  be  confusing  from  the  outside  while  not  looking  into  it,     but  we  have  to  remember  a  few  very  important  things.      1)    tracy  was  dead  for  a   month.       this  has  been  a  running  fact  throughout  this  show    —–      death  changes  you.      there’s  a  darkness  that  surrounds  you  that  will  always  be  with  you  once  you’ve  died.       tracy  wasn’t  dead  for  a few  minutes,     for    a  day,      she  was  dead  for  an  entire  month.         it  wasn’t  necessarily  that  she  just  embraced  darkness,       but  that  she  literally  was  brought  back  from  the  darkness.       before,      she  never  had  guidance  from  anyone     (   no  mother,     a  nearly  absentee  father.   )       she  had  no  friends,     no  one  she  was  close  to.      even  the  school’s  guidance  counselor  told  her  that  her  serious  problems   were  just   ‘   common  anxiety   ‘     and  that  she  had  nothing  to  worry  about.       she  was  never  treated  fairly  by  anyone,     so  she  never  felt  like  she  belonged  anywhere.      

theo  noted  himself  as  her  alpha  and  instantly  said    ‘   you  belong  to  me.   ‘        this  instantly  clicked  for  tracy.        it  gave  her  a place  to  belong.      it  gave  her  someone  to  follow,     which  was  something  she  always  desired.      it  was  because  she  had  no  tie  to  anyone  in  her  previous  life  that  i’m  sure  theo  found  it  easy  to  prey  on  her.      while  another  chimera  with  ties  to  their  life  before  death  could  gravitate   to  them,     tracy  had  no  one  to  do  that  with   —–    she  only  had  theo,      making  it  so  that  her  focus  was  entirely  on  him.        for  a  girl  who  had  just  been  dead  for  a  month  to  come  back  and  know  NO  ONE  and  have  no  family  with  a  house  that  is  a  crime  scene,      where  was  she  going  to  go  and who  would  she  turn  to?     ——       the  person  who brought  her  here.        in  her  mind,       theo  didn’t save  her  life,      he  CREATED  it.      the  life  she  has  now  is  a  complete  180  from  who  she  was  before,     and  that’s  important  for  her  to  take  advantage  of.

deucalion  says  it  best    —–     “   just  how  powerless  were  you  before  all  of  this  happened?     in  my  experience,     it’s  the truly  powerless  who  are  all too  eager to  demonstrate  their  newfound  strength.     “       he’s  right  about  tracy.      she  was  completely  powerless  before  theo,      but  now  he  offered  her  a  place  to  have  power   —    instantly  making  her  feel  confident  on  a  level  she  felt  nearly  invincible.      it  was  liberating  to  tracy  because  she  finally  felt  like  she  had  a  PURPOSE,     because  that  was  what  theo  did  for  her.        all  she  had  left  was  this  power.    the  only  person  she  had  was  theo.       it  would  have  been  difficult  for   her  to  avoid  darkness  at  all.

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tracy  felt  betrayed  by  theo  when  he  killed  her.

tracy’s  main  goal was  to  be  everything  that  theo  needed  her  to  be.       she  was  literally  his  PERFECT  WEAPON in  this  sense.      what  he  needed,     she  did.      she  was  always  more  concerned  about  his  safety  than  her  own     (     that  was  why  she  often  attacked  people  without  thinking  of her  own  safety   because  she  knew  she  could create  a  wall  between  theo  and  the  victim.    )        if  he  thought  that  the  only  way  he  could  defeat  the  beast  and  take  its  power  was  to  have tracy’s  powers,      she  would  give  them  to  him.      in  her  mind,     he  deserved  them,     and  she  was  here  to  do  whatever  she  could  to  make  sure  he  got  them.       he  had  to  have  known  this  anyway,      not  that  he  ever  needed  her  permission    —–    but  it  was  obvious  that  she  was  willing  to  do  anything  for  him.

if  she  knew  that  was  the  best  option  for  him  and  knew  it  was  really  what  he  wanted,        she  would  have  no  problem  giving  up  herself  and  her  power for  him  as  long  as  it  helped  him  survive.           theo  killing  tracy  was  not  an   act  of  betrayal  to  her,       and  it  wouldn’t  be  had  she  survived  the  attack.         she  would  simply  be  GRATEFUL  that  she  could  offer  him  something.        this  is  the  main  reason  i  do  not  interact  in  a  canon  timeline  past  season  five     —–     what  happened  here  was  very  much   in  character  for  both  characters  and  showed  a  lot  about  who  they  were,       especially  to  each  other        (    theo  willing  to  sacrifice  even  his  best  beta  just  for  his  selfish needs,        tracy  so  heavily  manipulated  by  him  that  she  would  be  willing  to  give  herself  up  for  him.    )      

tracy’s  beliefs:       she  died  in  the  arms  of  the man  she  loved.      she  died  in  turn  for  theo  to  be  more  powerful,     which  was  always  her  main  goal.       she  would never  regret helping  theo,      even  if  having  her  powers  didn’t  last  long  for  him.

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if  tracy  survived  theo’s  attack,      she  would  go  to  scott’s  pack.

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tracy  wasn’t  important  to  theo.

i  know  i’m  overstepping  on  this  one  as  this  is  more  of  a  meta  for  theo,      but  her  character  is  often  invalidated  because  people  forget  the  connection  these  two  had,      and  this  post  would  be  irrelevant  if  i  didn’t  touch  on  the  BIGGEST  misconception  of  all.      let  me  preface  this  by  saying  this  is  something  i’ve  discussed  with  @nctafailure  over  and  over  again,      getting  a  real  look  into  theo’s  perception  in  all  of  this.        what  people  seem  to  forget  is  that  killing  tracy  was  never  part  of  theo’s  overall  plan      (   neither  was  josh,     for  that  matter.    )      the  murder  of  both  of  his  beta’s  death  were  an  act  of  IMPULSE.     he  needed  their  power  right  then  and  there,     so  he took  it.      

tracy  was  his  BEST  BETA.     she  was  someone  who  was blindly  loyal  to  him,    and  he  knew  she  wouldn’t  disobey  him.      theo  is  a  guy  who  uses  people  as  tools.      he  wants  things  to  work  in  his  favor.      he  wants  HIS  WAY.      why  would  he  disregard  someone  who  has  literally  made  it  in  NUMBER  ONE  GOAL  in  her  life  to  please,    protect,    and  obey  him?      he  has  the  most  useful  tool of  all,      his  own  kanima  that  he  has  mastered.      while  no,     he  didn’t  care  for  her  on  a  personal  level     (    i  haven’t  forgotten  WHO  we’re  talking  about   )       she  was  still  a  good  resource for  him.       she  looked  out  for  him,      she  protected  him,      she  was  violent  to  those  he  needed  out  of  his  way.       in  the  end,     theo  cares  about  what’s  useful  to  him,      and  tracy  was.      

he  valued  her  opinion   (   she  was  always  there  to  back  him  up  with  anything.    )        even  if  he  worried  he  made  a  bad  decision,      she  would  assure  him  he  didn’t.        he  asked  her  for  validation.         though  we  only  saw  this  once  in  canon,     it’s  pretty  obvious  that  it’s  not  the  only  time  he’s  needed  it.      after  he  kills  josh  and  deucalion  reminds  him  he’s  only  making  his  pack  smaller,      theo  is  quick  to  look  over  to  tracy  and  ask  her,    ‘   what  do  you  think?   ‘     he  knows  she’s  going  to  remind  him  that  he  made  the  BEST  decision  that  would  end  up  helping  them.    

he  trusted  her  with  an  important  task.      they  had  created  an  alliance  with  the  desert  wolf.      he  got  the  talons  that  would  take  the  beast’s  power,     and  she  got  her  daughter  to  kill.       for  theo  to  hold  up  his  end  of  the  bargain,      he  sent  tracy  to  open  the  mountain  ash  to  let  the  desert  wolf  in  to  kill  malia.      this  was  something  he  wanted  to  ensure  happened,     and  he  trusted  tracy  with  the  mission  rather  than  the  rest  of  the  pack,      probably  because  he  knew  they  wouldn’t  have  accomplished  it.    

yes,    he  killed  her.     but  he  killed  her  for  his  own  selfish  needs,   not  because  he wanted  her  dead.   this  wasn’t  a  malicious  effort  to  get  rid  of  her;      it  was  an  act  of  SURVIVAL.       i’m  not  saying  it  was  okay  for  him  to  kill  whoever  he  needed  to  get  his  way,      but  to  insist  that  he  had  always  planned to  kill  her  or  that  he  had  killed  her  because  he  didn’t  want  her  is  bogus.       it’s  also  very  clear  that  he  didn’t  even  have  that  idea  until  AFTER  the  kiss    ( i see  all  the  time  that  he  only  kissed  her  to  kill  her,     but  he  literally did  not  have  to  kiss  her  for  that  to  work.    at  all.   )         he  needed  to  HEAL,     tracy   didn’t  have  the  ability  to  take  his  pain.    she  put  the  idea  in  his  head  that  they  needed  to  rest  and  take  a  step  back,     and  he  needed  to  move  forward.     he  needed  to  take  the  beast’s  power  and  time  was  running  out.      if  he  took  her  power,     he  could  use  that  and  be  STRONGER.     right  now,     his  only  goal  was  getting  the  beast’s  power,     with  or  without  a  pack  by  his  side.     killing  her  was  impulsive,      not  planned  as  the  deaths  he  wanted  from  the  mccall  pack  were.

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