#and I still draw her when im bored
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"oh, what was your first oc?" "lol everyone's first oc is always sooo embarrassing." "Everyone always has the same--"
MINE WAS A CHILD.
An autistic, nonverbal child that created God.
Do with that what you will.
#selectively mute#to be completely accurate#and I still draw her when im bored#original characters#ocs#creative writing
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yall ever think Shen Yuan went through like, internet withdrawal after being transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu? Like, he's canonically a NEET shut-in who did nothing but spend his time online, you can't tell me that for the first week or first few weeks of being SQQ he wasn't twitchy.
Like, reaching instinctively to his pockets for a phone that wasn't there, having an obsessive itch in the back of his mind that he should check and see if X or Y novel or webcomic has updated -- only to realize he can't anymore and being irritated by it. Wanting to go and see if there's new posts about this or that, but again realizing that he can't.
When he's bored or uncomfortable or just feels like wanting to escape he tries to go for his phone to distract himself, but oops! Not there anymore, and now he has to find a new and different way to distract himself from his feelings. And going through system notifications, quests, etc only does so much.
And there's that Tetris Effect too. SQQ makes a mistake while writing and instinctively goes to backspace on it except hey-ho that's not a keyboard and now he just dipped his pinkie into a bottle of ink or on a still-drying letter.
With him scrambling to fix his reputation and learn how to be a peak lord, I think his abrupt cold-turkey from all things internet would just be another straw on the camel's back that he promptly Ignores until it goes away on its own after he acclimates to his new surroundings.
#svsss#mxtx svsss#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#i think him learning how to be a peak lord and cultivation and everything else would help distract him from the internet withdrawal for the#most part. but the moment there's a lull in the day and his mind wanders or he becomes bored or stressed and he instinctively reaches back#for his phone and realizes it isn't there it just sends a spike of panic/frustration/irritation through him because its a familiar comfort#and now its gone. like this is all based off my own experiences from being Chronically Online but i just think its neat to think about#in that same vein i think it also pushes him into getting into the arts on QJP. Like as the peak lord naturally he would be doing this kind#of stuff but hes NOT the peak lord but to keep up appearances he has to know how to do this stuff. and finds it??? actually quite rewarding#even more than getting into an argument online or getting a new merch item. he's making or doing this stuff. he starts drawing and finishes#a piece and regardless of its skill level he feels something unclog in his chest. like sediment being scraped off the bottom of a creek and#being washed downstream. a weight that's been slogging through his veins suddenly untangled. physical proof of his efforts that feels great#starry is incapable of NOT giving her favorite blorbos more hobbies. starry is incapable of not giving her favorites artsy hobbies#this is probably NOT a new or original thought whatsoever but im throwing it out there anyways bc it fascinates me. i love transmigration#and albeit i've only read isekai manhwa/manhua there's a common theme of the people there assimilating into their new lives relatively quic#which i know is for ease of transition and getting to the rest of the story. but WHAT IF.#i have still not read svsss yet and idk when i'll be able to BUT have some thoughts anyways
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how about that uhhhhh Fantasy Julie. she gets her sword <3 no one can take it from her <3
rambles:
SIKE you get an extra, lower quality doodle
SIKE AGAIN here's the rambles
yeah... i caved and gave her a tail... I'm Not Sorry! it's cute! i wanted to stick with her sorta flower motif - it's stronger in her princess look, since I imagine that when she was part of the royals she was very blatantly flower power based. it was her Thing!
but a Julie free of her noble shackles... she deserves her big sword. like yeah, she has flower magic, but who needs it when she has a Giant Blade??? on the royalty vein, and if we're classifying "rainbow monster" as a species, i feel like horn size/curve would be a status symbol of some kind. maybe Julie would have kept her horns filed short. but if she ran away from that life... longer horns! i like to imagine that they'll keep growing until she has a pair of Extra Weapons attached to her head! curved forward like mammoth tusks maybe!
i imagine that like Frank, she goes with minimal armor - range of movement over protection, yk? some scale mail over her front, a thick leather flower over her chest w/ scalloped leather pauldrons, wrist armor and metal knuckles! i'd think that the faux-suspenders include a back sheath for her sword... i wish i'd thought of that Before i finished the little ref! i don't feel like going back and editing!
i imagine that she was forced to cut her hair when it got caught in something (a gelatinous cube, mayhaps). it didn't look good! don't let anime and Mulan fool you! cutting your own hair with a blade will not look nice! but someone - Eddie, probably, he's good with scissors i'd assume - cleaned it up for her. and hey, it didn't look bad! plus, Julie probably liked being able to just tuck up her long strands into her hat when she's feeling a bit more like a Julius than a Julie!
it's been a fun challenge transforming their canon outfits into a similar variation with fantasy flavoring and twists! i want them to suit the setting but still maintain Themselves! Julie's was tough i gotta admit. i was messing around with the princess look and the fighter look side-by-side. it worked better when i sat back and thought "fighter Julie is Julie unrestrained. that version would be more aligned with her canon look"
i wanted her princess form to look Restrained! she has to be a ~delicate flower~, a noble woman, pristine and poised and very much a princess. soft colors, poofy clothing, bright white gloves that are not to be sullied. carefully bundled up hair! jewelry! that dress must be Heavy and hard to move in! her tail must be so cramped under there!
but Julie Unleashed? violent pinks! rose gold accents! short skirt so that she can sprint and Kick! fun boots that she can be active in and delight in watching them get dirty! her hair is free to whip in the wind and get caught in things! fun straps and Deadly Accessories! a sword that she stole from the royal armory on her way out the window! she has forearm wraps both to match Frank and to support her wrists!
#yessss this was mainly an excuse to draw jules with short hair and a tail. i do not apologize#i like to think that poppy has a bottomless bag that she's too scared to use herself#but everybody keeps things in there#julie keeps her hair-hiding-hat in there and some pants and a cape for that Julius Vibe#(yes i could have gone with julian. but julius makes me think of orange julius and. yum)#i've said in initial rambles that i think that julie has Mild plant magic#I TAKE THAT BACK SHE'S SO FUCKING POWERFUL#i think she could hold her own against wally here tbh!#she wouldn't win if home had the reins but yk! it would still be Close!#but why would she use boring magic when she can slash punch kick#she can definitely talk to all plants. like im carrying that over thats so cool#trees warning her of an ambush... trodden-on flowers pointing her in the direction of her quarry...#roots arching out of the ground to trip anyone about to beat her in a race#scribble salad#wh fantasy au#so in canon julie left The Cave#which. fuck is that supposed to be a reference to plato's cave? ok no now's not the time for speculation#so she left the cave to seek out a life of her own#so i imagine that she left the royal life for much the same reason! she didn't want to sit on a throne in a poofy dress and lead!#she wanted to Adventure! see the world! be unrestrained!#i imagine that her repeated sneaking out is how she met frank - then when she ran she went to him cause she knew he wanted to leave#and she went 'hey im ditching this joint wanna come' and Of Course the answer was yes!#adventuring duo that never regret it for a second!#also as im making refs im adding them to a Lineup. which i'll post when ive collected all the pokemon (neighbors). size refs!!!
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Hi so in case anyone was dying to know, this is what i think some of the cast of the terror would look like as animals :3 notes under cut
From left to right:
Crozier- Irish Terrier
Silna- Polar Bear
Goodsir- ryeland sheep (known for tasty mutton ;3)
Hickey- red fox
Franklin- old english game rooster
Fitzjames- red deer
I had fun coming up with them :) and I kinda wanna doodle some screencaps but with like a lil short sheep goodsir and his bestie the giant polar bear lady silence whom he thinks would love England. Or like hickey on his bullshit but with more flair bc he would have a fox body and tail to really fuck up that line of action
Anyways heres some closeups and sketches
#i give the gift of short king to those i love#this is like my first time delving into anthro anything but i like the lil leg shapes#and how i can push the character design#i have trouble pushing human body typs but animals was a lil easier#puppyyyyyyyyy#ahem anyways i stg i actually made a pointed effort to avoid fandom when watching this show bc i wanted to develop mature opinions on my ow#about this masterpiece of a tv show#and my opinion is everything about the show was great i looooooooooooove ocean based horrors AND arctic horrors yippeeeeee#except i didnt like the magic polar bear#my fav antagonist was the lead in the cans i loved her <3#i also have like nuanced opinions or wahtever but those are boring#anyways despite the way i went about watching the show i did still end up drawing crozier as a doggy#so thats my cross to bear i suppose#the terror#james fitzjames#francis crozier#yeah that should do it#the terror- animal au#?#maybe#im putting that tag in just in case i ever wanna draw more doggy crozier. and everyone else i suppoe.#would you. ghys believe me if i said my fav was actually goodsir#anyways if they were all doggies they would be#irish terrier (obvs) - northern inuit dog - airedale - coydog - bloodhound - poodle#from left to right#anyways im done yapping
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Is this canon? Technically no.
Is it even In character? Absolutely not!
Do I care? Not really!
Locus is my blorbo and i can put him in annoying situations, like having a small squad of annoying but just-good-enough-to-not-kill-them Feds, if i want to
#rvb#red vs blue#rvb locus#my art#batsy art#samuel ‘locus’ ortez#rvb oc: the clovers#necoda ‘neko’ micce#anton pavoz#neko looks tall when he’s next to anton and ivia#but he’s like barely 5’6 so when you stick him next to 6’2 locus#anton: ive seen his chest plate more than his helmet#ivia: you can see his chest plate? (shes 5’ even she cant see shit)#i dont have the spoons to work on my bigger pieces bc i have commissions coming up which yay money#but it means i need to consolidate my art energy for a bit and my brain is like nooo my blorbos#in the words of the fave: unfortunate!#i need to get paid tho#so instead: silly doodle time#little guys#no ivia bc i only had a small corner of my sketchbook left and she didnt fit sorry bestie#in my heart shes off helping dr grey she doesnt really get a lot of spare time to spend w her boys until the armies merge#and the medic population doubles#so do the soldiers but theyre consolidated now at the pirates shoot to kill with much better aim so…ya know#batsy do u ever not ramble in your tags? no this is my stream of thought for future me#and anyone bored enough to actually read my tags#i still have beef with the prefect helmet i hate drawing it i love its look im punting it into the sun
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Based on a this ask
#TYE Spoilers#March#Eko#Iddy#Messar Robin Bastar#should I tag Kai and Gugu? they’re technically there (Hairo too. if you squint)#My Art#To Your Eternity#To You The Immortal#Fumetsu No Anata E#Getting some practice in drawing some of the other goobers#if you can believe it I have the most trouble drawing March out of any of em lol#Like Gugu’s difficult but it’s because the mask is so intricate#but March has that round little face and sometimes when I draw her hair she just ends up looking like a pear lol#Messar’s hair was pretty tough too but I also wasn’t looking at too many references so that one’s on me#anyway I LOVE LOVE LOVE THEIR DYNAMIC IM SO GLAD WE GOT TO SEE THEM ARGUING AND MARCH NAGGING HIM AUGH#and Iddy having March’s back with the receipts lol like AH I imagine they’re like partners in crime sorta (or Justice I suppose)#Messar was gonna be yawning all ugly to show that the conversation bored him but I guess I succumbed to his charm cuz he turned out real hot#like. idk what happened. I guess i want him now 🫶#sad i cant post this on Twitter or Instagram at the moment cuz my friends still haven’t finished Season 2#so y’all are getting the first look 👍#as soon as they catch up all of this is fair game tho
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sitting there like has my art gotten better over time or do I just add way too much unnecessary detail now
#but lineart becomes honestly really meditative for me at times especially if im adding texture to something#i will say at least i dont pick such ugly colors anymore. i used to always have reslly bright colors and then i thought it was too much#and overcorrected imo so everything was desaturated and boring#oh i also used to color in the lines for like every single color on the character? idk how to describe it but it was tedious#i like it on other people's art but i dont have the patience and i dont like how it looks when my lines are “cleaner”#sometimes i do miss how i used to not care if what i drew was “cringy”#but i think im coming back out of that considering all i draw is like. gay shit and elves and various iterations of myself and also my ocs#i should redraw some really really old art after what im working on maybe#i almost started working on a redraw of when i drew yavanna in likr 2017-18 but i dont like the design i gave her at all#minus the weird branch ears those were cool#mostly im just frustrated it still takes me hours to draw lol. i dont know why i get insecure about it or about art in general#i guess bc no one in my family really does so they have this idea im good at it#and i wanna grab them and shake them sometimes and explain all the reasons im actually not and all the mistakes i regularly make#i dont know if that makes any sense and i dont know why i struggle to just take the compliment#i guess because i know im not good enough at it for it to be a job? except thats not it either because ive almost always wanted to write#its very dumb and weird. especially considering i dont really draw for other people. i mean i like when people like my art but unless its#for somebody specific im not necessarily going to take it very hard at all if its not to their taste. i just do it because i enjoy it#and because there are things i only know how to express through writing or drawing. and when one doesnt work sometimes its the other#maybe i just get frustrated i cant be good at everything#its not realistic but i always end up wanting to do so many things and getting frustrated when i dont pick them up right away#because OF COURSE i dont#ok where was i going with this#its nearly 2am and my head is pounding again i dont even know what day this makes it. at least a week?#i dont know
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some of my success stories cuz giving more advice is boring
before knowing about the law:
1-shifting when i was 5 using imagination
2-manifesting a dimple on my right cheek when i was 7 by affirming and imagining
after knowing about the law using imagination and affirming:
1-erased two memories by imagining my memories in a computer and i replayed that memory and deleted it ( i can remember that i deleted it but i dont remember what happened)
2- (A TEST) was reading a neville book and the part was about how he told the audience to imagine climbing a ladder and that they will really climb it and so i did climb a ladder in the next week when i completely forgot what i even imagined
3-wanted an electric milk frother but couldnt find any in my country so i imagined it and my mom bought it for me after 2 days
4-never gaining weight no matter how much i eat by affirming that food doesnt affect my body and that i only gain or lose weight when i want to
5-i hated when someone had my password so i robotically affirmed that my mom always forgets my password until i fell asleep and now 3 years later she still forgets it that she gave up
6-was sick for 2 years and each doctor told me smth different so whenever i felt the symptoms i affirmed “im healthy physically and mentally” until they went away and i only did that for two times and thankfully they never came back
7-wavycaqe made a story asking her followers to send their photos cuz shes gonna draw them so i sent mine and imagined that she drew me and forgot about it AND SHE DID OMG (she posted a video of the drawing)
using subliminals:
fuller lips, upturned eyes, long hair, long legs, bigger nail beds, compliments.
i also moved cities when i visited a city last year and i rlly liked it and i decided im gonna live here and randomly this year we moved there( we werent even planning to)
these are what i can remember rn im just manifesting that my manifestations are always instant(they are most of the time but yk)
#loa blog#loablr#manifestation#reality shifting blog#shiftblr#loa tumblr#loassblog#manifesation#manifesting#shifting realities#loassumption#loa success#loa#shifting#shifting community
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just wondering 👉🏼👈🏼 when the next update of his lady love will be? i’m just so excited for the next chapter im OBSESSED with the story 👻
I'm so sorry I took this long, I've been having a mental block with this
His Lady Love (9)
pairing | aemond targaryen x vampire!mikaelson!reader
taglist | to be added to the taglist just add your username to this DOC
word count | 3,8k words
summary | finally you make your return back to king's landing and reunite with aemond
tags | hurt/comfort,
note | I'm so sorry I took so long
likes, comments, reblogs are much appreciated ✨
𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 - 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 - 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫
The storm had raged for a week, battering the old farmstead with rain and howling winds. Inside, the small prince had finally begun to show signs of recovery. Jaehaerys, once pale and on the verge of death, now had the flush of life back in his cheeks, thanks to the small doses of your ancient vampire blood. His eyes, once glazed and distant, now held a quiet strength. Despite his reserved nature, the boy had grown fond of you in his own way, calling you “munās”
The crumbling farm had served its purpose. Though it was no Red Keep, the rations you had scavenged from Tym’s meager cupboards had been enough to sustain the both of you. Tym, the unfortunate soul whose blood had been your own sustenance, now lay rotting in a closet—his death no more significant than a footnote in a much larger story. The smell of his decaying body was thick in the air, but it hardly bothered you. In your long life, you had smelled far worse.
Outside, the rain had finally ceased. The journey back to King’s Landing would be dangerous, but necessary. You could already envision the uproar awaiting your and Jaehaerys’ return. Let them fret; it was no concern of yours.
You gathered what little provisions were left and tucked them into a satchel, slinging it over your shoulder. The food wasn’t for you, of course, but for the prince. He would need his strength if he was to survive the coming days. As you approached Jaehaerys, he looked up at you with a small, fleeting smile—a gesture that melted your dead heart. Without a word, you draped a thick cloak over his shoulders, pulling the hood low to hide his silver Targaryen hair. The last thing you needed was to draw unwanted attention on the road.
The air was damp and heavy as you stepped outside, the smell of wet earth mingling with the distant scent of the ocean. You hoisted the boy onto your horse, his small frame easily fitting in front of you. The skies were still dark, but the rain had stopped for now. With a flick of the reins, the horse began its slow trot down the muddy path.
As you approached the towering walls of King’s Landing, the familiar stench of sweat and desperation thickened in the air. Your grip on Jaehaerys tightened, pulling him closer to you as your sharp senses took in the chaotic scene ahead. The streets swarmed with restless peasants, their voices a cacophony of rage and despair, echoing through the narrow alleyways that led to the Red Keep.
You focused, your hearing tuning into the mob’s cries. They were angry, starved. "Food! Bread!" they screamed, their desperation palpable. The realization struck you almost immediately—Rhaenyra must have sealed off the city. No traders, no merchants, no supplies flowing in. It was a power play, of course. She sought to starve out the opposition within her rightful walls, but it was the smallfolk who suffered most. Typical.
But it was what you saw next that made even your blood freeze.
Through the throngs of people, a procession of white cloaks—Kingsguard—marched proudly through the streets, their armor gleaming in the dimming light of dusk. In their hands, they bore a horrifying trophy: the severed head of a red dragon. Melys, you thought, the Red Queen, her crimson scales dulling in death.
The thought of Daemon’s dragon, Caraxes, crossed your mind briefly, but you dismissed it just as quickly. Daemon was not so easily felled. He was a force of chaos, relentless and unyielding. But Rhaenys... She had fought valiantly for her kin. It had to be her. Aegon had slain her and had the audacity to parade her dragon’s head as if it were some twisted victory.
The crowd grew louder, their protests turning to angry shouts as they watched the grotesque display. You could feel the fear rising among them, but it was overshadowed by the hunger—both for food and for rebellion. The city was on the brink, and Aegon was playing with fire.
Jaehaerys stirred slightly in your arms, oblivious to the grim spectacle unfolding before you. He was innocent in all this, yet he would soon be thrust into the heart of this brutal war. With a final glance at the dragon’s severed head, you urged your horse forward, pulling the hood of Jaehaerys’ cloak lower to shield his Targaryen features. The mob surged around you, but you moved through it like a shadow, unseen and unstoppable.
As you slipped through the shadowed alleys and hidden paths of King’s Landing, the weight of Jaehaerys in your arms was a reminder of just how fragile human life could be. The streets were filled with chaos, but to you, it was nothing. In six hundred years, you had perfected the art of moving unseen, a phantom in the night.
It wasn’t hard to imagine how those men, Daemon had sent, had managed to infiltrate these halls. It was almost laughably easy for you to slip past the guards. They were easily distracted, and you had no trouble avoiding detection.
Your thoughts kept drifting to Aemond, his sharp, striking features, the single violet eye that gleamed with intelligence and ruthlessness. You yearned for him in a way that surprised even you. In all your centuries of existence, through the rise and fall of empires, you had never felt this way about anyone. Aemond had a way of stirring something deep within you—a hunger, not for blood, but for him.
It was strange to admit, even to yourself, but you loved him. In your immortal life, you had seen love twisted and turned into something vile, something manipulative and fleeting. But with Aemond, it was different. His ambition, his fire, even his darkness—those were things you understood, things you were drawn to.
Still, love would have to wait. For now, your priority was Jaehaerys, the boy asleep in your arms, his silver hair tucked away beneath the hood you had wrapped around him. You glided through the hidden corridors of the Red Keep with ease, your steps silent, your presence undetected.
Helaena’s chambers were quiet when you arrived, the door slightly ajar as if awaiting your return. You pushed it open gently, stepping inside to the dimly lit room. Helaena was sitting by the window, her eyes distant and unfocused, lost in her thoughts.
You frowned noticing the dark circles beneath her eyes as the frown that tugged on her lips. “Helaena,” you whispered softly, moving toward her.
Her gaze shifted slowly, her violet eyes blinking as if pulling her from a dream. When she saw Jaehaerys in your arms, her expression changed—a flicker of recognition, of hope. Her lips parted, a gasp escaping her as she stood from her chair.
Helaena breathed out your name softly, her voice fragile, as if uttering it too loudly might cause you to vanish. She rose from her chair, her steps tentative, as if unsure whether you were real or some apparition conjured by her grief. Her eyes glistened with tears, her hands trembling as she reached for you.
You gently placed Jaehaerys in her arms, watching as she clung to him with a desperation that broke your heart. Her tears flowed freely as she kissed his sleeping face, her maternal love rekindled in the boy’s presence. For a moment, the weight of the world lifted from her, her sorrow held at bay by the soft rise and fall of her son’s breathing.
"I knew you weren't dead," she whispered, her voice hoarse but filled with conviction.
A frown creased your brow, confusion settling over you like a fog. "Why would you think that, Helaena?" you asked softly, your concern growing as you saw the pain etched into her delicate features.
Helaena’s gaze dropped to Jaehaerys as she gently rocked him in her arms, her sorrow palpable in the silence that followed. "Three dead Kingsguard, your carriage burnt to ash... what were we to think?" Her voice cracked as she spoke, the words heavy with the weight of grief she had been carrying.
The shock hit you like a dagger to the chest. Your eyes widened in disbelief. "My carriage... burnt?" The last time you had seen it, it had been intact. And worse, Aemond—he must have thought you perished in the flames.
You could feel the fear rising in you, not for yourself, but for him. What had Aemond been thinking all this time? The very thought of him mourning you sent a pang of sadness through your heart.
You swallowed the rising tide of emotion, forcing a smile to reassure Helaena, though it felt strained and unnatural. Your hand rested gently atop hers, offering comfort the way you always had, with a tender touch and a steady heart. "I am fine, my Queen," you said, your voice soft but firm, hoping your words could ease some of the burden that weighed on her. "Jaehaerys is fine. We are both safe, and that is all that matters now."
Helaena looked up at you, her eyes swimming with unshed tears, and for a moment, she seemed to believe you. But you could see the remnants of her anguish still clinging to her, a shadow she could not shake.
Seeing Helaena in such a state—it wounded you, though you could never let it show. You had centuries of practice hiding your own grief, your own longing. But now, with Aemond believing you dead, you felt the familiar weight of sorrow creeping back in.
You had to find him. He needed to know you were alive.
"I have to find Aemond," you murmured, the urgency in your voice betraying the calm you had tried to maintain.
Helaena’s eyes snapped to you, her sorrow deepening as she spoke softly, "He’s changed."
Your brow furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"
Helaena hesitated for a moment, as if weighing her words. "The battle at Rook’s Rest," she began, her voice barely above a whisper. "He brought down both Rhaenys and Aegon."
You flinched, a ripple of shock running through you. "He killed Aegon?" Your voice trembled slightly as you spoke. Despite Aegon’s many flaws, despite his cruelty, he was still Aemond's brother. How could Aemond have done such a thing?
Helaena shook her head, her expression mournful, weighed down by grief. "No. He didn’t kill him, but he might as well have. Aegon is burnt beyond recognition... A shadow of himself now."
The words hung heavy in the air, and you struggled to grasp them. "Why?" you whispered, more to yourself than to Helaena. How could Aemond, the man you loved, have let things go so far?
Helaena’s gaze softened, and she pressed another kiss to Jaehaerys' forehead, her voice filled with a melancholy acceptance. "Aegon’s taunts… his cruel words… Perhaps he had enough of being belittled, of being treated as lesser, when in truth, he has always been the stronger of the two."
You could see the weariness in Helaena’s eyes, the understanding of how deep the rift had grown between her brothers. But what you couldn’t understand was how much Aemond had changed in just a week. The man you knew, the one you loved, was fierce and proud, yes, but he had always been measured, calculating. To hear that he had snapped so violently, even against his own kin—it worried you.
But you had to see him. You couldn’t wait any longer.
Without another word, you turned toward the door, your mind already racing with thoughts of Aemond—of the man he had been, and the man he might be now.
Aemond was riding a dangerous high, the taste of victory bitter on his tongue. He had dealt with Aegon—though not as thoroughly as he would have preferred. Aegon still lived, if one could call it living. Burnt beyond recognition, a husk of his former self, barely clinging to life. But it didn’t matter. Aegon was no longer a threat to him, and now, Aemond stood as Prince Regent. His mother’s protests were of no consequence to him anymore. She had forsaken him, after all. Turned her back on him, chosen Aegon despite everything. Well, now he would forsake her.
He clenched his fists tightly as he forced his thoughts away from her disappointment, her judgment. It wasn’t Alicent's rebuke that tormented him now. No, when he allowed his mind to drift, when the battlefield fell quiet and the bloodlust faded, his thoughts always, always came back to you.
And that was a pain he could not bear. The sharp sting in his chest that came whenever he remembered your face, your voice, the way your eyes looked at him with a softness no one else could offer. That softness had been his anchor in a world of chaos, and now it was gone. You were gone. Aemond clenched his jaw, forcing the memories back down, but they refused to be silenced.
You haunted him.
So he clung to the one thing that had never failed him: anger. The rage burned hotter and clearer than any sorrow ever could. Vengeance had always been his closest companion, and now it was the only thing he had left to keep him standing. It was easier to drown in that fire, to let the heat scorch away the grief, than to face the aching emptiness your death had left behind.
Because to truly feel the weight of his heartache—to allow himself to grieve—would be a descent into madness. It would be a slow, deliberate suicide. And Aemond Targaryen would not be destroyed by sorrow. He had survived too much for that.
His face was a mask of cold determination, but inside, the wound you left was bleeding still. Anger was a salve, not a cure, but it was the only thing keeping him alive.
As long as he was angry, he couldn’t be sad. And as long as he avoided sadness, he wouldn’t have to confront the truth: that without you, something in him had already died.
Aemond made his way to his chambers, eager to escape the oppressive weight of the castle and the relentless thoughts swirling in his mind. His steps were heavy, and though he had embraced the cold edge of his anger, exhaustion tugged at the edges of his resolve. He needed a moment, just a fleeting break from the burdens of regency and family strife.
But as he pushed open the door, his breath caught in his throat. Standing in the center of his room, with their back turned, was a figure he knew too well. His entire body froze, heart pounding so violently it hurt. His mind, sharp and disciplined, rebelled against the sight before him. It couldn't be real. It shouldn't be real.
Aemond's throat tightened, and he rubbed his eye, the patch over the other itching against his skin as if willing this cruel vision away. His breaths became shallow, harsh gasps escaping him as the figure turned.
And there you were.
The eyes he had dreamt of, that he had mourned for, were looking back at him, alive with warmth and familiarity. "Aemond," you murmured softly, your voice like a balm to his tormented soul.
He stumbled back, his chest heaving with the effort to contain the surge of emotion ripping through him. You moved toward him, your hands reaching out as if to soothe, but he flinched. The pain in your eyes mirrored his own, though he couldn't understand why. He had believed you dead, and now you stood before him. But his mind, ever cautious, doubted the reality before him.
"You're not real," he choked out, the words leaving his lips like a prayer, desperate and broken.
You faltered for a moment, your face contorting with an expression of pain. But it wasn’t for you—it was for him. "I am real, Aemond," you said firmly, your voice unwavering even as his trembled. Then, softer, you added, "As real as the sun and stars, my love."
Tentatively, he reached out, his hand shaking as he brushed your cheek. The soft warmth of your skin against his palm sent a shock through him. His lone eye stung with tears as he leaned closer, feeling the truth of your presence in the softness of your flesh. And when you leaned into his touch, his entire world seemed to shift.
The sob broke from his chest, raw and aching, as he pulled you into his arms with a fierce desperation. He crushed you against his chest, his face buried in your hair, inhaling the scent he had feared he would never experience again. It was real. You were real. His hands trembled as they tightened around you, holding you as if you might slip away once more.
"You're real," he whispered, the words tumbling from his lips in a reverent chant, as if saying it enough times would make it an undeniable truth. "You're alive."
Tears streamed freely down his face as he clung to you, the walls he had built around his heart crumbling in your presence. You had returned to him, and in this moment, the weight of the world, the rage, the grief—it all faded away in the warmth of your embrace. He whispered your name like a prayer, his chest shaking with the sobs he could no longer control.
The two of you had eventually found your way onto Aemond's bed, his arms wrapped tightly around you, as if afraid you might vanish if he loosened his grip. The moonlight spilled softly through the window, casting a gentle glow over the room, but all that mattered in this moment was the warmth of his body beneath yours. You lay on top of him, your noses touching, your breaths mingling in the quiet stillness of the night.
And yet, he only stared at you, his eye searching your face as if trying to memorize every inch, every detail. It felt like an eternity before he finally spoke.
"I don’t understand how," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper, the confusion and longing in his eye clear as he tried to reconcile your presence with the grief he had been drowning in.
You lifted your head slightly, his gaze following your every movement. Gently, you brought a finger to trail down his scar, your touch soft and comforting. His eye fluttered shut at the sensation, as if the weight of the world lifted momentarily under your fingertips.
"Helaena told me what was believed," you began, your voice steady as you prepared to weave the lie once more. "But the truth is, our carriage was ambushed. The Kingsguard were killed." You paused, then continued with conviction, "I escaped with Jaehaerys. My intent was to return."
His eye opened slowly, a flicker of something vulnerable passing through his gaze as he asked in a voice that was unusually soft, "Why did it take so long?"
"The prince fell ill on the journey. My only priority was his health, not how quickly we could return," you explained, your lips pressing together in a thin line. "I'm sorry it took so long," you added, guilt weighing your words, though the truth of your ordeal remained hidden beneath layers of carefully constructed deception.
Aemond's expression softened as you rested your head back against him, in the crook of his neck where you could hear his heartbeat, steady and strong. "You're here now," he whispered, his voice filled with relief. It seemed as if that was all that mattered to him in this moment.
The silence between you lingered, a peaceful reprieve from the chaos that awaited outside these walls. But after a while, he spoke again, his voice barely breaking the quiet. "I'm Prince Regent now."
You already knew, of course. Helaena had told you, but you wanted to hear it from him. "Helaena told me what happened to Aegon," you said slowly, choosing your words carefully. You had to know the truth, not from Helaena’s recounting but from Aemond himself. You needed to understand what had happened, why he had done what he did.
There was a pause, a silence that stretched on too long before he finally spoke. "He was not supposed to be there. At Rook’s Rest," he said, his voice low and distant, as if recounting a memory he wanted to forget.
Your hand rested on his chest, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat grounding you. "What happened, Aemond?" you asked, your tone soft but insistent, though part of you dreaded hearing the answer.
Aemond’s face hardened, his eye staring up at the ceiling, his jaw clenched. "Aegon got what he deserved," he said flatly, his tone almost indifferent. "He was unfit to rule. Unworthy to sit the throne."
His words hit you like a stone sinking into a well, and though you had expected them, it still hurt. Aegon was not a good man. He was cruel, selfish, and unfit to lead, but knowing that Aemond had taken such drastic action—it was a bitter pill to swallow. The world was better without Aegon’s reign, and yet the weight of Aemond’s decision loomed over you.
You studied his face, searching for any hint of remorse, of conflict. "Was it worth it?" you asked quietly, though you weren’t sure you wanted the answer.
Aemond didn’t respond. He simply stared at the ceiling, his silence speaking louder than any words could. And you didn’t push him. You knew Aemond better than anyone; his guilt, his anger, and his desire for power all warred within him.
So you lay there, your hand on his chest, letting the silence stretch on, knowing that in time, perhaps, the answers would come. But for now, you were content to simply be there with him.
@esposadomd @sara-grimes-yess @littybeech @gyneve @https-kokomi @yariany02 @baby-w3-ar3-infinite @baby-i-can-see-your-reylo @niktwazny303 @missyviolet123 @caribbeangal @ggukiespace @levimaids @lokisgoddesofpower @anakilusmos @spacexdrago @strawberymilktea @snowtargaryen @fiction-fanfic-reader
Names that are in bold are ones that couldn't be added :(
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#aemond targaryen x reader#house of the dragon#aemond targaryen#aemond x reader#hotd aemond#aemond one eye#aemond x you#hotd fanfic#mikaelson#hotd#the originals#hotd x reader
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behave
in which fem!reader REALLY wants spencer's attention while he's working
18+ (no smut but sex is talked about) warnings: mentions of sex, spencer grabs readers wrist to stop her from doing something but its not violent, reader is referred to as a girl, no use of y/n, um i think that's it WC: 870 a/n: i have damn near 40 pages of spencer WIP so im biting the bullet and posting some of it. also.. if you want a plot... babe this is not the place for you im sorry... ive never even heard of a plot actually. i dont know about rising and falling action... i dont believe in that. it sounds fake
It feels like Spencer has been at his desk for hours.
And for hours you've been lounging on the couch, reading your book in silence so as to let him work. But you're becoming... antsy. Impatient. Every time you drop your book and stare at him, willing your white-hot gaze to draw his attention; nothing. He just keeps shuffling papers, signing, writing, reading reading reading.
At ten, you give up.
You make a show of slamming your book shut, sighing, slowly sitting up, stretching, standing, stretching again--when you turn your head, expecting your little performance to have at least earned a look from him; still, nothing.
"Spence?" you ask, innocuously, as you round the couch and draw toward him carefully, slowly, on light feet. A display of faux innocence. It’s not that you intend to bother him, per se--you're just so bored.
He hums in response, eyes still glued to his work as he searches for something among the mess of paper.
You come to a stop in front of the mahogany desk, tracing the edge of it idly with wandering fingertips.
"What are you looking at?" you ask, in reference to a photo he seems to now be studying intently.
"Nothing you need to see," is his muttered response, quickly flipping the photo face down on the desk and picking up a form walled in migraine-inducing tiny black text. You watch the way he scans the paper, brow knitted, and eyes squinted, clearly not paying you very much attention.
You move languidly around the desk, letting the wood drag against your hip the whole way, before reaching for the overturned photo--just to see what he'll do.
Spencer catches your wrist, his grip gentle and warm but not without portent. "What did I just say, grabby?"
Sadly, they're the most words you've gotten out of him since this afternoon.
You sigh dramatically and drape yourself across his lap, looping your arms around his neck. To your initial satisfaction he shifts slightly to accommodate you--and then continues to look over your shoulder like he hardly notices the pretty girl on top of him.
"When will you be done?" you purr, tracing his jaw with a finger.
"I'll be done when I'm done."
God, he can be stubborn.
"Can you be done any sooner than that?"
"What do you think I'm going to say to that," comes his flat reply, still not sparing you a glance. You watch enviously as his eyes dart down the paper he's reading over your shoulder.
"Then I'm staying right here until you're finished."
"You can stay here if you can behave."
You scoff, bunching the fabric on the back of his shirt in your fists. "What do you mean, if I can behave?"
Finally, you hear Spencer set down his pen, and he leans back in his chair to regard you. His gaze finally on you is like an ice bath. You literally have to repress the urge to shiver under his evaluation; the slightly raised eyebrows, the line of his mouth a little harder than usual. His 'you know exactly what I'm talking about so don't play dumb' look.
For a few tense seconds, you let your eyes dart between his, not wanting to break first. Unfortunately, you think that look of his could freeze saltwater.
"Fine," you mutter, flushing when you look down at his shirt collar instead. If you're being reasonable, he probably is doing something important. You drag your gaze back up to his and see that his eyes have softened.
"Thank you," he says, gentler, squeezing your leg before running his hand over it back and forth a few times. "I know I'm not being very fun today. When I'm done we can do whatever you want to do."
The urge to say, 'whatever I want to do?' is strong, but you manage to bite your tongue as he reaches back over you to continue his work. Instead, you content yourself to lean against him, allowing his solidity and warmth to envelop you for some immeasurable stretch of time.
Rain starts up, battering the windowpane and accented by deep rolls of thunder. The scratch of Spencer's pen on paper, the rustle of files, and the scent of patchouli and amber begins to lull you into a doze--a comfortable place between awake and asleep. It's the kind of comatose unconsciousness that bends and liquifies time, and you don’t even realize you fell asleep until you’re waking up.
Spencer murmurs your name, brushing your hair carefully out of your face. "Did you fall asleep, angel?" His voice is soft, just above a whisper.
"Mhm," you groan, rubbing your eyes. "How long has it been?"
"A few hours," he sighs. "That file took a lot longer than it should have, I'm sorry."
You're still bleary as you speak next;
"The thing was sex."
"What?" he laughs, rubbing your leg as you adjust yourself in his lap.
"You said we could do whatever I wanted to do when you were done, and it was sex. But now I'm tired."
"Let's get you to bed," he begins, "and revisit the sex idea in the morning. Does that work for you?"
You smile against his shirt, eyes already fluttering closed again.
"Mhm..."
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x self insert#criminal minds#spencer reid x y/n
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ok Ik you said Pazzi fic in studio but will never get the idea of Paige calling azzi mamas out of my head so just felt like I needed to share an idea for a blurb or to include in anything you write PAIGE CALLINF AZZI MAMAS
anon ur a genius but i am simply a fool who took this prompt and then ran with it and turned it into a random oneshot soooooo i apologize for the minimal use of ‘mamas’ but hope u like it anyway and will implement that in all my writing deadass
pet names.
paige bueckers/azzi fudd.
2.8K.
kinda bullshit rambling but a lil more of a structure to follow???
minimal nsfw so 18+ as fuck
Wait guys let me know how u rly feel bcuz im not suuuper happy w this one
at first, it’s a subtle change.
it’s not like paige is ever actually serious enough for her words to be taken to heart or with any ounce of meaning behind it— she’s a fucking idiot, and azzi was more than well aware of her incessant antics, and the fact that she just played too much.
so, of course it surprises her, but she can’t say it really means anything, until it does.
it’s funny to azzi, really, when recently, all of a sudden, paige will get caught up in her usual tangents that she’s started letting these random, little pet names slip from her lips, mouth moving so fast, almost as if she barely meant it, could barely even call it out herself.
it happens usually when they’re tired— or, at least when azzi’s tired, and paige is excited. sweat clinging to the back of azzi’s neck, her curls drawing up and away from the edges of her hairline, skin flushed and hot to the touch when paige is suddenly breezing past her. she’s somehow still in a jog despite the rigorous drills they’d done, oblivious to the redness of her face or the plastered strands of blonde hair against her forehead. she’s at the tail end of a conversation with KK, still grinning like a fool about whatever they must’ve been chattering about, yelling out some type of phrase or joke that only those two could conjur up.
azzi’s right eyebrow is already lifted, somehow already suspicious and unimpressed of her intentions when paige is launching straight into a new conversation, cheeks still pink and teeth on display as she skips backwards to keep her eyes on azzi.
“i think me an’ KK are ‘finna go play 2K when we get back to the dorms— i told her ass she doesn’t stand like, a single chance when I’ve been on my grind, and she don’t believe me, like, baby, you know i’ve been on that shit,” she clicks her tongue, rolls her eyes before she’s smacking azzi’s arm, giving her a sneaky grin, one that signaled whatever she was offering was really gonna be a delight, (it never was), “you should come chill. you don’t gotta play if you don’t want, you can always be my lil’ cheerleader.”
it wasn’t like her high energy, rapid movement behavior was anything unusual, but that little, barely missable word was.
baby. it rolls off her tongue like it’s been waiting around the whole time, lingering beneath the surface, waiting for the moment to strike. she says it with an ease of comfort she can’t necessarily place, and azzi doesn’t necessarily hate it, but it’s there, nonetheless.
it momentarily stunts her, but azzi still finds herself smiling— not from any type of fluster or flush miraculously, but one that she usually gives paige when she’s amused by her, eyes wide and exaggerated as she huffs out a chuckle. “that sounds… boring, honestly.” but, she’s laughing at the gape on paige’s face anywa, “i need to shower, dude, i don’t wanna watch video games.” she scoffs, before she grins at her, only because she knows it’ll piss paige off.
and it does, so, of course the walk out to the parking lot is filled with a whole lot of, ‘oh my god, bro, you’re so lame.’ or, ‘like, azzi, you can have a turn ‘forreal, like just come over for like, deadass a second.’
ultimately, and unsurprisingly enough, paige ends up getting her way. though, she’ll swear it’s only because azzi takes her shower, does some homework and is in the middle of taking out her braids when the word hits her again, and again, and again.
babybabybaby.
she can’t really blame the way she rolls her eyes despite herself. her and paige had been close for fucking ever, so there wasn’t necessarily much between them that was off limits, but it still resonated within her as something azzi couldn’t just brush off. whether that was more damaging than pretending it never happened, she didn’t have a single clue.
all she did know, was that paige bueckers got her way entirely way too much. so much so, that azzi has to let out an audible groan reserved only for paige, before she texts that she’s on her way over.
and yeah, whatever, maybe it wouldn’t matter so much if it was just a one-off, or if maybe their friendship wasn’t so fucking complicated in the first place.
but then, it does matter, because it doesn’t stop happening.
when paige is frustrated at her homework, sitting plainly with her legs at full extension in the study room with aaliyah, ice, and azzi, it leaves her lips in a huff of exasperation, “azzi, babe, this shit really makes no sense, swear.” even if she’s saying it in the voice that clearly states she hasn’t attempted it for nearly long enough to proclaim she doesn’t get it, “az, can you please just come check it out.” azzi can’t tell what’s worse; the fact that paige had said it, or the fact that nobody had even looked surprised that she did.
or when they’d gotten dressed for media day, everyone milling about as they try not to wrinkle their uniforms or crease their concealer, it’s paige (and eventually nika and aaliyah) that whoops and hollers during azzi’s solo pictures, something like, “yeaaaah princess! nation’s best, babyyyyy! work that shit!” followed by a series of whistles that sounded so off pitch it makes azzi snort, rolling her eyes as she purposely avoids the gaze that paige so obviously wants to capture, teetering at the edges of azzi’s peripheral with a grin so wide it threatens to make her blush.
and, she swears she doesn’t, and instead turns back to the photographer with cheeks only a touch pinker than they were previously, “sorry— can we do that again?”
really, the only time she’d ever allowed herself to actually enjoy it, was on the last night at the hotel after a game. it couldn’t have been later than two or three in the morning, paige and azzi having spent the majority of it whispering beneath the covers, anything to not wake up the two other girls asleep in the other double bed.
it’s not too bad, having to share beds— except that, paige is a chronic cuddler and azzi would rather sleep on the shitty futon than be subjected to paige’s unrelenting weight against her back, or her arms slung lazily over her, but it was because of that precise position that azzi could even hear the words when she says it.
“mmmh-,“ she hums tiredly first, speaking mostly out of her ass, like paige always did when got too tired and let herself start rambling “night, pretty girl.”
it’s soft, and sort of raspy— the way paige gets when she’s been screaming all night on the court, and azzi can really only tell by the amount of ibuprofen that she’d downed before bed being somewhat more than her usual, that she’s probably got a headache. it’s a voice she uses when she’s being sincere.
the quiet sentiment, however insignificant to anyone else, replays in her mind. almost like a secret. almost like the closer she keeps it to her chest, the harder it’ll be to lose it.
it makes her whole body warm all over.
her response comes a few beats later, when she’s sure paige has drifted, and nothing but her measured breath is puffing against azzi’s neck, heard only between the two of them.
“night, p.”
but then, suddenly, everything sort of changes. azzi doesn’t know when this part happened— maybe it’s between the time she kisses her at that bar, tipsy and too close, unaware of the camera that set the internet aflame, and now, where it was customary that paige did homework with her, or ate dinner with her or slept over all the time. perhaps, it’s one selective moment in the chaos between that had suddenly transformed paige’s subtle casualty of the pet names, to something more intimate. more for them, rather for anyone else.
or, maybe it was exactly where they knew they’d end up all along.
it’s after a night out, after neither of them had ever really questioned how this had became their routine. that now, it had become something unspoken, an inherent rule that was followed without it needing to be stated. that, when they got too fucked up with the team, and the ubers were being ordered, azzi and paige always went together, that the address would always end up being paige’s dorm, and that azzi would always be curling into purple sheets by the time she sobers up enough to sleep.
but, she’s not sober. she’s drunk, and her face is flushed hot, sticky with the bar atmosphere. “paige, you’re making me too hot.” azzi complains with an impatient lilt to her voice, lifting her right shoulder up to her neck as if to shrug paige off, but the girl is relentless, humming her denial as she slid a hand across azzi’s thigh, grasping it hard enough that her nails dug into the skin there.
“psh, you’re already hot, shut up.” the words are spoken clumsily, lips brushing against the bare skin of azzi’s shoulder with each word, while a sudden surge of annoyance and somehow gratitude courses through azzi for having worn a sleeveless top, “c’mere, mamas, ‘lemme lay on you.”
she’s being whiny, and it only makes azzi roll her eyes before her gaze flickers to the screen of the car, giving her another light elbow prod, only this time, a short, sneaking smile is crossing her face. “paige, ‘forreal, we’re about to be back anyway.”
this, somehow, only fuels her. “i’m wounded,” she complains, before she’s pressing a little smack of a kiss to azzi’s neck, “my girl’s so mean to me, shit.”
my girl.
what the fuck ever.
azzi should’ve demanded an explanation then, but she doesn’t.
in fact, there’s not an explanation waiting for them when they stumble into paige’s room, their hands in a tight grasp, pulling each other in so that they can both fall against the bed, and azzi really shouldn’t have been expecting one. it’s definitely not explained when they’re somehow under the blankets, and paige has an arm, long and lean, wrapped around azzi’s waist to end somewhere between her legs, fingers finding a rhythm that seems to pull the very air from azzi’s lungs.
it’s not what azzi was expecting to happen, and yet somehow they’d fallen into place like it something they’d done a million times. paige had undressed her, after azzi’s complaint of still feeling too hot, and paige— not even a singular bit sober— finds her hands along the bottom of azzi’s top, tugging it over her head before she tosses her an old basketball camp shirt that had been slung across her dresser.
“you gonna sleep in jeans?” is really what had started it, paige’s pointed tone making azzi’s face burn hot, but the smirk on her face never faltered. “you’re so annoying.”
because then, paige has her fingers hooking into azzi’s waistband, eliciting a string of giggles that escape because fuck, she’s ticklish and paige knows. “what? what am i doing?” the blonde is grinning too, snickering under her breath as azzi’s pants are yanked down her hips, kicked from her feet with minimal effort until azzi feels it. a featherlight kiss was placed to each of her scarred knees, the inside of her thigh, eyes flickering up to azzi’s hazy but steady gaze, “this okay?”
god, azzi hadn’t realized until just then how fucking okay it was.
it’s quiet, sensual even, the way that paige talks her through it— heel of her hand dragging endlessly against her swollen clit, fingers thick as they arched into her, teeth grazing the back of azzi’s shoulder with each word of encouragement.
“c’mon, mamas, jus’ like that.” had anyone known better, they’d think paige must’ve been getting off just to this, by the way her own voice hitched and caught, her own hard swallows that reverberated in azzi’s ear, each laced with little gasps as she plunged into her wetness.
but, azzi did know better— paige was absolutely getting off to it. her voice is all breath, crackling and barely audible, murmuring incoherent mumbles that make it almost incomprehensible to decipher, yet, azzi swears she can understand.
it’s in her ear, over and over, that heat and pressure between her legs building as her hips twitched involuntarily against her knuckles, feels the way they slide deeper within her and azzi lets out a noise that even she’s too embarrassed to recount. “fuck, i wanna hear that shit, need to hear you baby, please.”
it coaxes the orgasm straight from azzi’s core, thighs involuntarily squeezing around paige’s hands, to which the blonde is silent in muted awe. she watches with bleary eyes but bated breath, sitting up only a bit to really witness it. the way azzi’s face drew up, eyebrows furrowed and lips parting, the whimper edged breaths that huffed out of her, the tight clamping of her eyes shut.
“so fucking pretty,” each word is punctuated in a kiss, “so good.”
really, it should’ve been a lot worse for them the next morning. azzi can’t help the wave of a ground shaking realization she gets when she rolls over to inspect paige’s sleeping expression, lips slightly parted, her blonde hair mussed on the pillow behind her. there should’ve been some type of lingering awkwardness that hung above them, some type of trepidation or fear, maybe even regret.
it definitely wasn’t like they talked about it, but they’d also never quite gone this far. did they need to? probably, because azzi knew that the guilt would probably hit sooner or later.
in fact, azzi waits for it to hit, all the way until paige wakes up, and her eyes are a little puffy, watery blue and clear as she blinks up blearily at azzi like she’s the finest thing she’s ever laid eyes on (because she is), and whispers with a grin, “distracted by my beauty?”
she waits even until the next away game, when her legs are propped up over paige’s lap and her fingers are drumming absently against azzi’s thigh, humming something in her headphones with her eyes shut, looking like a complete idiot, before their eyes meet by chance when paige opens them, and suddenly, they’re both grinning.
she even waits for it to hit when the buzzer goes off after the fourth quarter of that game, an easy win, and confetti is thrown. it’s chaos really, with all the girls rushing through the tunnel to get back to the lockers. that is, until, paige pulls her aside for half a second, hidden away from the hungry eyes to press a solid, sweet kiss to her lips.
but it doesn’t end there. azzi waits for it during her injury, when enough nights in linoleum covered white floors with the constant smell of antiseptic start to pierce the inside of azzi’s brain, ruins her attitude enough that paige’s texts go unanswered. and yet, everytime azzi wakes up, the pain in her leg flared and angry, it’s paige that’s sat in the corner of the room, huddled under a shitty hospital blanket, waiting for her to wake up.
it went even as far as the loss against IOWA when the roles are reversed— after the excitement of final four had became real, after the grueling, rampant preparation, and then ultimately, a loss. it’s when azzi gets permission to stick around in paige’s hotel room until she gets back from the game, and the way that the blonde, finally in the safety of the four walls, found herself crumbling to azzi, becoming nothing but a shell of what everyone perceives her to be, everything paige wishes she fucking wasn’t.
it’s only then, that azzi finds herself returning the favor— arms wrapped tight around paige’s waist with a burning, sting in her own eyes that she can feel the moment she sighs against the crown of paige’s head. she can smell the sweat, the smell of a basketball court that had just gotten waxed, but really, azzi just smells paige, and that’s enough to give her the composure she needs to whisper against her head, “don’t be so hard on yourself, baby… you guys did so good.”
and they don’t talk about it, because they don’t need to. the same way they never had to ask the other when it came to the hospital or bus rides or homework dates or hotel rooms— it was unspoken, implied but never mentioned. the same way back when they’d met at USA camp, it was never a matter of conversation for their plays to work, it was all in the matter of a look, or a slight of hand.
and when the team starts asking, giving paige shit about how she’s missing video game nights with KK or azzi’s getting shit about caroline missing her study partner, everybody already knows. when paige tells nika, voice only a little timid as she gives her a condensed version of the last few months like it was a ground shaking news, head tilted to lean on the older girls shoulder, the brunette bursts into laughter. ‘finally, took you guys long enough.’
and really, it was a wonder they hadn’t been like this the whole time.
a wonder that it had taken this long in the first place.
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Is there a guide on how you draw and color each of the Homies’ eyes? I noticed each one has their own slight designs to them; maybe to signify their powers and different universes?
dude... its a small thing, but whenever someone notices and brings up details in your designs, its always suh a heart-warming notion that people see the stuff you do... thank you! QwQ this ask just made me so happy ;3 so happy that i actually made a lil guide to explain my design choices! xD
Generally, my artstyle choice is to try and keep as close as possible to the original styles, for several reasons: a) to keep the characters recognizable and b) because im too lazy to try and do something too fancy. xD
Kim was an easy transition from cartoony! Its just her normal eyes, but a bit more anime-like? lol
Jenny's is the same shape, but instead of stylized light, I decided to give her more animatronic/robot like pupil in electric blue & white color, with light in the center (imagine it contracts smaller/bigger like a robot's). Also a bit more color on movable eyelids just for funsies. ;)
Danny's was a bit weird, because I wanted to keep the og big-eyed style, so it resulted in Danny having very big eyes. xD In his ghost form, I decided to give him green sclera and a more narrow (beast-like) pupil, as a nod of other ghosts solid eye colors and a hint to his growing power. ;) (Just imagine when he gets overwhelmed with strong emotions his iris and sclera kinda meld together into solid green!) The growing power is also the reason why I often add green accents into his human blue eyes!
Jake was one of the big changes, since his og cartoony eyes are very plain and boring. So I decided to go a bit nuts. Because of his dragon form, his usual human dark brown/blackish eyes changed colors that range from red-orange-yellow (colors of fire) and his pupil is much narrower than normal human's. The change of eye color can seem like the flare of amber on brown eyes whenever sunlight hits them to other people. And if you notice, I added what seemed to be red eyeliner to his design, which is actually not make-up - it's tough dragon skin! Like Jake's sharper ears its a sign that his dragon form kinda bleeds into his human form, due to his grown strength.
Jun is another easy transition from cartoony to my style! The more notable change I added is that her light brown are now darker and less orange/reddish brown, but more dark pink in shade! It's a hint of her magical power, which is usually in shades of pink (like her hair streak). When she uses magic, her eyes can glow in very light pink colors.
Zak is kinda mix of his two designs, with a dash of my headcanons. Originally his eyes were dark brown, but as his powers awakened more, the color lightened more and more, and after the finale, they gradually turned to his TGIF design color! I kinda like the idea that when he uses his powers now, his pupil glow white amidst the orange/golden. Usually its not that noticable, but its very obvious for other magical beings/wielders.
Ben is another sorta mix, but leaning more towards AF/UA design. I like to headcanon that his eyes were darker green, before he put on Omnitrix again, after which his eyes started to get lighter with that Omnitrix glow which resulted in lighter Omniverse color.
Rex is like... practically his normal eye in my style. xD Maybe a bit more dark browner + sometimes when he uses nanites, the pupil can glow electric blue/white (kinda mix of Zak & Jenny lol).
Randy was actually the biggest pain in the ass and I'm still unsatisfied with it. ;/ I might change it later, but for now its basically the same deal as with Danny! Maybe I'll add something cooler later down the line for him. xD
But, yeah that's basically it! Thank you sm for the ask <3 hehe and i hope you enjoy this lil guide. ;3c
#que?#hom au#hom au q&a#when i first entertained the crossover idea i though of drawing them with those basic/common anime-like eyes...#but where would be fun in that? besides i suck ar drawing anime eyes xD#this weird cartoony/disney blend of my artstyle works for me
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Jinx x f!reader and their first kiss, date, time, fight, all that couple stuff short little pieces of girlies being cute
★。/ get jinxed \。★
pairing: jinx x f!reader
fandom: arcane
word count: 1,612
tw: canon typical swearing/slang, some light spoiler warnings, and some suggestive/NSFW content! MDNI!
notes: this is a fic i am really excited for! Thank you again for the request anon! It was really fun to write, and i got through it pretty quickly to be perfectly honest because of that haha. Not proofread because im tired, and i have no shame :D enjoy!
! be sure to like and reblog if you enjoyed !
➼ first date with jinx
You worked under Silco delivering shimmer across Zaun. Of course, you knew you shouldn’t have been doing this, it could get you arrested without question and you’d find yourself in Stillwater. But it paid well, and working so closely with the Eye of Zaun meant you didn’t have to worry as much about danger in Zaun. People saw you as a god-send, you gave them their weekly hit, if anything, the danger made them respect you.
It was during this time that you met Jinx, while picking up your next delivery of shimmer from Silco’s warehouse. She had been there to speak with him privately about some arson issue that happened in Piltover. You had heard briefly about a lanky, blue-haired girl that would build bombs in the open space beneath the warehouse, but it was rare that anyone had ever seen her. But you managed. Somehow.
She intercepts you on your trade route, setting bombs off in the street just across from one of your clients. Jinx claims to recognise you from skulking around the warehouse. And at some point her chaotic energy and her strange inability to sit still seems to lull you into some sense of security. She’s just the perfect idea of unpredictability that you needed in your otherwise boring Zaunite lifestyle. (Though you were very lucky, all things considered.)
Your first date is a simple diner one. At first, you didn’t even know it was a date, just that she wanted to do something fun with you. She takes you in to meet her favourite bartender Chuck, who seems to almost slink beneath the counter when she drags you in. I feel like Jinx would give you a little monkey bomb as a gift for your first date - though it isn’t set, it’s pretty harmless. Other than that she bombards you with strange bursts of Jinx-aligned humour, and rambles at length about her various inventions, promising to take you down to her workshop to show you everything, while tightly gripping your fingers with chipped blue nails.
And something in those bright, blue eyes makes you think that maybe this unpredictability could be quite fun.
‘Don’t ya get bored frownin’ like that?’ jinx drums her nails on her glass, the clinking echoing throughout the empty bar. It was quite odd, you reckon, for it to be this quiet, but maybe its just jinx.
In her own way of trying to get a smile out of you she starts spouting some random jokes. Tries telling her own funny stories. They all mostly revolve around bombs or explosive presentations she’s organised at piltover events. Mainly the absurdity of it all gets a laugh out of you, or you just smile at the giddy, child-like happiness you see in her eyes. Something that seems so pure (ignoring the fact that she’s probably an arsonist and on several watchlists)
‘There ya go!’ she cheers, grabbing onto your hands and interlacing your fingers. You think maybe you should paint your nails too to match her, see if it makes her happy. ‘You look so much prettier with a smile, trinket’
➼ first kiss with jinx
It was after your third or fourth date that you ended up spending your free time in the warehouse. Jinx begins showing you all the new inventions she’s making, and all her designs for cartoony monkey bombs, you even help her draw out a few, including a cutesy little cat one that she isn’t as fond of, but she still makes one for you.
Most of your relationship consists of Jinx making you little trinkets, like keychains, safe bombs, little bracelets and rings, and strange, misshapen sculptures made of leftover metal pieces.
She loves you, in a very Jinx-way. She’s touchy but never very pushy. Long hugs, cuddles on a couch that she has balancing on a metal propellor in her warehouse, letting you braid her hair when she’s tired (please brush her hair, she will melt, and she needs some softness), holding hands in Zaun or dragging you to her private meetings with Silco. Whether you like it or not, you have the Eye of Zaun as an adopted father figure now. He isn’t quite sure what to think about it either.
It is one of those cuddle sessions, after she is plagued by the voices that taunt her, that you end up just holding her face into your neck and sitting with her. These are the most important to her, like she can feel safe for once.
‘Thank ya toots,’ she curls around you, straddling your lap and looking down on you with an innocent pout on her face. You don’t have to ask what she’s thanking you for, this has become a pretty regular occurrence.
In her moment of calmed silence, you untie one of her braids and begin to brush through her long, blue locks with your fingers. She immediately melts into your hands, leaning forward to lean into your chest, gazing up at you.
‘I feel like ya deserve somethin,’ she says absently, tapping her chin with one nail. Then a mischievous smile crosses her lips. ‘C’mere!’
She eagerly grabs your cheeks, barely giving you a second to register what’s happening before she smushes your faces together. Her lips are chapped, but her kiss is so enthusiastic that you have to take a moment before returning it. Your hand grips her hair in between tight fingers.
The rest of your cuddle sesh is spent with soft, hurried kisses.
➼ first fight with jinx
You don’t often fight with Jinx, you don’t like to yell at her or be upset, and watch her usually gleeful expression drop into that of a kicked puppy. But you were worried about her this time.
She had gone up to piltover against Silco’s wishes again, most likely to stir up trouble, so he decided to send you after her to drag her back to Zaun. When you had gotten there however, you found only the debris of her explosions, the spraypaint she loved, clouds of coloured smoke, and guards everywhere.
And no Jinx.
No sign of her or where she could be, you had no choice but to return to Zaun before you got dragged into the oncoming investigation, empty-handed. You spend the rest of the day worrying over where she might be in her workshop, sitting with your head in your hands on the couch. Is she hurt? Captured? She could be dead for all you know.
So when she shows up again, seemingly ignorant to how long she has been gone or the stress she has caused, you can’t help but raise your voice, crying about how you had expected the worst. You scream back and forth for a bit before she leaves you to burn off her energy.
‘Hey trinket,’ the door to her warehouse screeches open, and she stands in the entrance, looking at you as you sit on the couch, barely even looking at her. ‘Ya still mad at me?’
She sighs when she doesn’t get a response, coming close to wipe at the dried tear-stains on your cheeks, setting down her tools and her guns to favour your face between her hands. Jinx makes sure you can see only her.
‘I’m sorry i vanished, i didnt mean to scare ya, honest.’ she pulls you down to lean into her shoulder, still stroking your cheeks with her fingers. ‘Can ya forgive me, trinket? I’ll make it up to ya, i promise.’
Jinx cuddles with you on the couch for the rest of the day, showering you in kisses at your request. Safe to say, you can’t stay mad at her for very long at all.
|| ! mdni content below ! ||
➼ first time with jinx
Jinx has always loved touching you, whether it’s a hand on your knee, an arm around your shoulder, or a hug from behind. She just loves to be close to you. But when you begin talking about the idea of sex with her she immediately jumps on the idea (and probably jumps on you as soon as you bring it up, you only barely manage to drag her somewhere private)
She’s an enthusiastic lover in all things, of course. Fucking you isn’t going to be any different. But she’s gentle the first time, despite it all, she doesn’t really know what she’s doing, i don’t think Silco really prepared her for intimate relationships.
But still, having sex with Jinx is amusing, its not serious, always cracking little jokes or tickling each other and finding little ways to be comfortable with the process. You can’t really find it in you to be nervous.
She’d start slowly with you though, if you wanted, just to make you comfortable <3
‘God trinket, ya look s’ pretty like this for me,’ she’s already slightly breathless, skirting her hands and dragging her chipped nails over your ribs. She lays you down on the couch in her warehouse, sitting between your thighs, looking up at you with half-lidded eyes.
‘Ya feel alright?’ she checks in occasionally, just to be sure.
But she lets her hands wander at the same time, she can tell you aren’t going to say no just by the look in your eyes, urging her to continue. She lets her hands travel over your stomach and down in between your thighs, but she doesn’t hurry where you need her. No, she prefers to tease you. Just a little bit to get you squirming.
When she does finally reach your core, dipping her fingers in between your folds, does she finally let up and give you what you want.
#arcane#arcane smut#arcane headcanon#arcane fanfic#arcane x reader#arcane imagines#jinx#jinx arcane#jinx x reader#jinx league of legends#powder arcane#vi x reader#fanfic#smut fic#wholesome#headcanon#imagine
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Hiii~ can you make a fiction for Kenan Yildiz where it’s a day off for him and the reader (his wife) and they are having a family day with their 3 years old son and 1 year old daughter , where they are taking care of them , playing a little and when the kids fall asleep they both cuddle in bed and have a romantic talk to sleep.
Thank you in advance sweetheart , your fictions are truly amazing 💗.
Our Little Family~Kenan Yildiz
*Pictures are from Pinterest*
we got wifi in our emergency house so I might as well right some things when im bored. enjoy <3
request from here
master list -> part 2
players/drivers I write for
The sun was just peeking through the curtains when y/n felt a small tug on the blanket. She groaned softly, still half-asleep, but she could already sense what was happening. Their 3-year-old son, Emir, was standing by the bed, his bright brown eyes wide and a mischievous smile on his face. He had clearly been up for a while.
"Mama, Papa," Emir whispered, tugging again, "I'm hungry!"
She heard a soft chuckle beside her. Kenan stirred, his arm slipping around her waist as he opened his eyes.
“Good morning, buddy,” Kenan said, his voice still husky from sleep. “Are you ready for a fun day?”
Emir nodded excitedly, his curly hair bouncing. y/n couldn’t help but smile at his enthusiasm. Sitting up, she heard a second, quieter noise from the baby monitor: their 1-year-old daughter, Leyla, was awake too, babbling to herself in her crib.
“I’ll get her,” she said, kissing Kenan’s cheek before climbing out of bed. Kenan sat up, stretching, and helped Emir onto the bed, where they immediately began playing a silly game of “tickle monster.”
y/n tiptoed into Leyla’s room, finding her sitting up with her chubby hands gripping the side of the crib. Her wide eyes sparkled with joy when she saw her mom. “Mama!” she gurgled, reaching out with her tiny arms.
"Good morning, my sweet girl," y/n cooed, scooping her up and pressing a kiss to her soft cheek. She nuzzled into her shoulder, as she inhaled the familiar baby scent that always brought her peace.
Once both kids were ready, y/n and Kenan decided to take them out for breakfast. The thought of enjoying a morning out as a family filled her with excitement. Emir was already talking about pancakes, and Leyla clapped her hands in delight as she bundled her up in a tiny jacket.
The café they chose had a cozy atmosphere, with a play area for the kids and plenty of space for Leyla’s stroller. As they entered, she saw the sparkle of recognition in Kenan’s eyes—he was already planning to spoil everyone.
The family settled into a booth, Leyla happily perched on her mom's lap as she helped her nibble on small pieces of fruit. Emir was across from her, excitedly showing Kenan how he could color in the activity book the café provided. Kenan leaned over, drawing a little football next to Emir’s attempts at coloring.
Breakfast was filled with laughter as Emir managed to get syrup all over his fingers, and Kenan joked, “We’re going to have to wash you like a car, buddy.” Leyla clapped at every new taste of food, and her giggles echoed around the café as Kenan played peek-a-boo with her.
After breakfast, the four of them headed to the nearby park. The fresh air felt invigorating, and the playground was just what the kids needed to burn off their morning energy. Emir ran straight to the slides, calling for Kenan to follow him. y/n watched as Kenan helped him up the ladder, his strong arms lifting Emir when he got stuck halfway.
“Look, Mama!” Emir called from the top. “Watch me slide!”
She cheered him on as he slid down with a triumphant grin. Leyla, nestled in her arms, reached for the swings, her tiny fingers pointing as she made soft cooing sounds. y/n placed her gently in the baby swing, pushing her back and forth as she squealed in delight.
Kenan jogged over after a few more rounds on the slide with Emir. “I’ll take her,” he offered, lifting Leyla from the swing. She immediately clung to his chest, her little head resting against his broad shoulder. It was a sight that always melted y/n's heart—Kenan was so naturally tender with the kids, and they adored him.
They spent the next hour playing as a family. Kenan chased Emir around, pretending to be a monster, while y/n sat on the grass with Leyla, watching as she tried to walk on her own. Each time she wobbled, she caught her, and she’d look up at her mom with a big, proud smile. Eventually, Kenan and Emir returned, both panting and laughing. Kenan collapsed onto the grass beside y/n, pulling Emir into his arms.
"You’re fast, little guy," Kenan said breathlessly, ruffling Emir’s hair. Emir beamed, clearly proud of himself.
When the afternoon sun started to tire everyone out, they decided it was time to head home. Back in the house, Leyla and Emir’s energy levels had dropped significantly after all the playing and excitement. y/n and Kenan bathed them together, filling the bathroom with giggles as bubbles floated everywhere. Emir splashed, pretending he was a pirate, while Leyla clapped her hands at the water, her eyes wide with fascination.
Once they were in their pajamas, they all curled up in the living room for storytime. Kenan sat on the couch, Leyla nestled in his lap while Emir snuggled into y/n's side, his eyes heavy as she read their favorite bedtime story. It didn’t take long for both of them to fall asleep, their peaceful faces bathed in the soft glow of the lamp.
y/n and Kenan carefully carried them to their beds, tucking each one in with a kiss. Leyla’s tiny hand curled around her stuffed animal, while Emir mumbled something about pirates before drifting back off.
As soon as the kids were settled, y/n and Kenan headed to their room. The day’s events had worn them out in the best way possible, and the moment they slid into bed, Kenan pulled her into his arms, holding her close. His warmth enveloped her, and she let out a content sigh, resting her head on his chest.
"Today was perfect," she murmured, tracing lazy circles on his chest. "I love watching you with them. You’re such a good father."
Kenan kissed the top of her head, his voice soft in the quiet of the room. “I couldn’t do it without you. You make all of this possible. I love our little family.”
She tilted her head up, and he leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to her lips. The kiss deepened for a moment, full of tenderness and affection. When they pulled away, y/n smiled at him, feeling her heart swell with love.
“Sometimes I still can’t believe this is real,” she whispered. “Our family. Our life together.”
Kenan’s hand moved to cradle her cheek, his eyes soft as he gazed down at his wife. “It’s real, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
With that, they both fell into a peaceful silence, their bodies entwined, hearts full.y/n drifted off to sleep, surrounded by the warmth of Kenan’s arms and the quiet joy of the life they’d built together.
#football#football x reader#football blurb#football imagine#football one shot#footballer imagine#juventus fc#kenan yildiz blurb#kenan yildiz fic#kenan yildiz x y/n#kenan yildiz x reader#kenan yildiz x you#kenan yildiz one shot#kenan yildiz oneshot#kenan yildiz imagine#kenan yildiz fluff#kenan yildiz fanfic#kenan yildiz#kenan yıldız
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I was always into dark things for as long as I could remember but got pretty ashamed of it. Seriously when I was a kid I drew cartoon characters dying horribly and then I would draw them in heaven having psychological breakdowns about it and I'm saying these were some of my first pictures I drew, i got really embarrassed even to show people angel drawings I made that when I got older I just completely stopped drawing angels out of complete embarrassment and as an adult I'm kinda like... Yeah... I understand I'm like a freak for art .. and I'm not ashamed anymore because I understand that a lot of it was my brain coping with losing my parents at a very early age which completely broke my entire reality and changed my life I always was getting special help with this and the social workers who worked with me as a kid they knew what I was drawing too and they were encouraging (and I got popsicles)..at some point I pretended that I grew out of it but...nope ...I'm exactly the same ..lol but I'm really thankful that I got a lot of special attention during that age they really wanted me to grow up to be normal and it worked im thankfully a boring guy (please let me call myself boring it helps me) anyway I really liked the social worker apparently she still has a drawing I did above her desk after all this time of has always been there...
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woah…..that zoya post…………now make them kiss (pretty please 🙏)
this took centuries. im so sorry
breaking point || zoya x reader [NSFT][MDNI]
cw. medical talk (or attempts at), kind of graphic descriptions of injuries (?), power bottom reader and service top zoya, unsafe sex in the sense reader wants to be dicked down so bad they diss condoms (practice safe sex gamers), fingering, creampie
notes. i dunno i just think zoya would like a partner with a little fire to them yk?? reader is just internally very horny for zoya but would not admit it even upon threat of death. also head in hands this is so disjointed im so sorry
taglist. @sinsmockingbird for when you awaken my liege
As an ER doctor, being able to keep a cool head even in intense situations is a priceless skill. You clarity and calmness could be the difference between a life saved and a life lost. Thankfully, you and your sister have always been good at being clinically cold—but even you both have your limits. For Iron, it was when she was forced to amputate her arm.
For you, it's watching a few legionnaires haul their Commander into the ER, barely conscious and looking half-dead.
"Trauma room 2, now," you snap, tossing your clipboard aside and pulling your coat tighter around yourself. Of course this had to happen on the one day Iron was in Eastside picking up supplies. Your mind races as you march alongside the legionnaires as they drag Zoya—hardly responsive, head hanging low, pallor to her skin—onto a cot. Your nurses swarm you like a well trained unit, moths to a light, awaiting your orders. You suck in a breath, let each molecule of air settle in your cells, before you dive headfirst into action.
"Four units of O-negative, and two large bore IVs," you command, your voice even as you move to stand next to the cot. The wound on her abdomen is substantial, and for once you're grateful for her frankly ridiculous fashion choices since it lets you save time on cutting her clothes off. Your gloved hands reach up to cup Zoya's pale face, your eyes cold as you look down at her. "Get the OR prepped and call anesthesia now."
"Zoya," you say firmly, gently shaking her head. "Oi, brute. Can you hear me?"
The commander remains silent, and you frown. Perhaps the situation is worse than you thought. One of the legionnaires, just a girl, shifts anxiously next to the bed. "Boss got hit by a Mania weapon," she explains, her voice trembling as if she's near tears. "It was supposed to be for me, but—"
"Do you know what kind?" you cut her off, and internally you flinch at the way she recedes from the iciness of your gaze. But she shakes her head, and you bite your tongue. The pieces of the diagnosis align in your mind's eye—Mania weapon, unknown effect, caused severe lacerations and subsequent hemorrhaging. High possibility of additional Mania contamination within her bloodstream, although as a Sinner risk of further complication on that avenue is reduced.
You draw in another breath. Okay. You can do this.
"You owe me for this, brute," you mutter, before you kick the locks off the cot wheels and start pushing her to the OR. The double doors greet you like the gateway to purgatory, and you push everything beyond your clinical expertise to the furthest recesses of your mind.
Under the bright OR lights, your form casts a long shadow over Zoya's still one. You exhale.
"Let's begin."
You only finish six hours later.
Your scrubs are stained red up to your elbows, and you can barely feel your feet after being on them for so long. But the heart monitor beeps steadily, and it is the only sound you want to hear now. You thank your nurses and tell them to get some rest. Once they're out of sight, you stumble back and lean against the wall, your eyes slipping shut.
Your hands are shaking.
You exhale. You're barely aware of the fact that you're sliding down the wall until you end up on the floor, the coldness of the tile seeping through your scrubs. The surgery hadn't been easy. Fishing remnants of Mania crystals out of flesh equally as red is always a challenge—often, the patient doesn't survive. Corruption sets in quickly, and all you can do is hand them over to Iron to nip the bud before it blooms.
But you saved her. She's alive, breathing, stable, so why does your heart tremble in your chest? Why does the sight of her blood on your arms make you sick?
Deep down, you know why. But the words knot on your tongue and catch against your teeth every time you try to say them. So instead, you settle for something else. A different emotion, but no less potent. And you pretend that the rush you felt that other day was nothing more than loathing. And whatever it is you're feeling now is just irritation that you had to spend 6 hours stitching her abdomen back together.
"Stupid fucking brute," you mutter to yourself, resting your head on your knees, pulled close to your chest. "Going out and getting yourself hurt like that. Aren't you supposed to be strong?"
You sit on the cold tile for a while, before forcing yourself back onto your feet. Your eyes roam impassively over Zoya's sleeping face, and you can't help but think how... soft she looks, peacefully asleep like this thanks to the anesthesia. It almost makes you want to reach out and stroke her cheek—but you don't, and instead turn on your heel and walk right out of the room.
After all, there’s no point lingering on pipe dreams.
"Doctor!"
You sigh, feeling a headache build between your temples. You turn to the nurse, scowling. "Yes?"
"The, um... the patient in trauma room two is awake," she answers nervously. "And she's trying to—"
Whatever your poor nurse is trying to say is cut off by none other than said patient striding down the hallway, unbothered, even as five of the other strongest nurses you have try to hold her back. She simply drags them along with each confident step. Also, she somehow managed to get her clothes back? You mentally add another thing to your to-do list—you'll have to have a stern talk with whoever manages patient belongings. Zoya stops in front of the front desk and eyes you up and down, and you shoot an unimpressed glare right back at her.
"What do you think you're doing?" you ask flatly, and Zoya shrugs.
"I'm here to say thanks," she responds, and you blink. That... wasn't what you were expecting.
"Oh."
"I'm also going to leave," she adds, and then you scoff, feeling the moment crumble in an instant.
"In your dreams. You're not due to be discharged for three more days." You round the counter to stand defiantly in front of her, and she raises a brow. Around you, your staff shift nervously. If Zoya decides to force her way out, there really is no one who can stop her.
"I'm perfectly fine," she counters, placing a hand on her hip. Your eyes flick down to it, and yes—the glaring wound in her side is healed up, almost beautifully. Such are the 'benefits' of being a Sinner. But you shake your head nonetheless, stubbornly digging your heels in. If Zoya is an unstoppable force, then by God will you be the immovable object.
"You're fine when I say you're fine," you roll your eyes. "Now do I have to put you on a leash or are you going to go back to your room on your own?"
Something flickers in Zoya's eyes, and she makes a derisive noise that has your brow twitching. You can feel your blood starting to simmer just beneath your skin. Really, one of these days she's probably going to give you an aneurysm.
“Hmm, how about this, then? You check me over, and if anything isn’t in already healthy condition, I’ll stay,” Zoya offers, and you cross your arms.
“And if not?”
“Then I’ll leave,” she answers coolly. “Deal?”
Your head throbs. “Fine. Just get in the triage room, I’ll make this quick.”
You stalk your way to the room, Zoya following on your heels like an obedient dog. Like this, it is she who casts a shadow on you, with her once again ridiculous height. It makes you want to see her on her knees.
You banish the though away as quickly as it came and sit Zoya down on the cot. She leans back on both her palms, relaxed as ever, watching as you flit about, pulling on gloves and putting on your stethoscope.
“Breathe in,” you order, and she does. Her lungs sound clear, which is good. You don’t hear the light chime of embedded Mania crystals, which is a relief. Your hand trails down her back before moving to her front, ghosting over her abs.
The injury that had left her bleeding all over your floors is practically gone now—only a thin white line proof it was ever there. You brush your thumb against the scar, and you feel the way her muscles tense beneath your touch.
You do your due diligence, pressing along her abdomen as part of a standard checkup. It’s a perfectly normal procedure to check for organ size, pain and abnormalities, but the thought that this is Zoya you’re touching almost makes your hands tremble. And the way she’s reacting—tense and breathing deep with each inhale—is certainly not helping.
Once you finally finish the exam, there’s a distinct charged feeling in the air. You glance up at Zoya, and her eyes are dark; just like the way they were back then. It makes you swallow reflexively, your blood feeling almost unbearably warm beneath your skin.
You’re still close to her. Your hands are still on her abdomen. You should pull away, but you don’t really want to. A part of you doesn’t even think it can.
“Did I pass, princess?” Zoya breathes, her warm breath fanning across your face. Your eyes narrow, and you look directly into her dark ones like a challenge.
“It’s doctor.”
She smirks. You want to kiss it off her. “Whatever you say, princess.”
“Fuck you,” you snarl, ready to pull away, irritation overtaking the lust in your system before Zoya grabs both your wrists and keeps you close.
“Fuck me yourself,” she whispers, dangerously close to your lips, both an invitation and a challenge.
A better doctor would’ve stepped away. Good thing, then, that you never were the best, because you meet Zoya’s challenge in a kiss that’s more teeth and tongue than anything else. Zoya grins against you, slipping off the cot to tower over you. Her hands move your arms around her neck as she walks you backwards, all while her tongue plunders your mouth.
Zoya pushes you against a wall with enough force to make you gasp, air rushing from your lungs. Her lips and teeth descend on your neck as her hands travel down to your ass, squeezing once before they find your thighs, guiding them to wrap your legs around her waist. You sigh in pleasure at the kisses she presses against the skin of your neck, one of your hands winding in her silvery hair while the other digs into her shoulder to steady yourself.
You’re now completely held up by her, but the fear of falling doesn’t cross your mind even once. You’re pretty sure Zoya can keep you in place by just pinning you to the wall with her hips. You grind your front against her pelvis, and you both groan at the friction against her growing bulge. Zoya’s fingers find the waistband of your scrubs, and she tugs them down roughly.
You tighten your grip in her hair at that, and she hisses in both slight pain and pleasure. “Careful,” you mutter to her, “you’re not allowed to rip them.”
Zoya scoffs against your neck but nonetheless obeys, and you sigh when you feel her knuckles rub against your clothed clit. Zoya exhales as she feels your wetness seep through your panties and onto her skin.
“So fucking wet, princess,” she coos into your ear, dragging a finger along your slit. She presses lightly on the ruined cloth, delighting in the way it sticks to your drenched lower lips. You nip at her jaw, a scrape of your teeth along the defined bone, and Zoya takes the hint.
Her fingers push your panties to the side, and then sinks knuckle deep into your cunt.
You bite down on her shoulder to muffle your moans, your pussy fluttering around the intrusion. Fuck, her fingers are so thick—she’s hardly done anything and you’re already so close to your peak it’s embarassing. Your legs tighten around her waist as she starts pumping her fingers in and out of you, the wet sounds of her working your cunt open echoing in the room. Her thumb presses against your stiff clit and you squirm, burying your face in her neck and panting for breath.
“Gonna cum, princess?” Zoya asks, a breathless edge to her voice. “You’re—fuck—getting tighter, baby.”
“Keep going,” you snap, somewhere between a snarl and a sob. Your entire body is trembling. You seriously might kill her if she does. “Don’t you dare stop.”
Zoya growls, and pistons her fingers even faster all while her thumb draws harsh circles against your clit. You babble whispered praise into her neck before one final, perfect stroke against that spongy spot inside of you had you creaming all over her fingers. The gang leader grunts as she feels your tightness bear down on her, and wetness seep into her palm.
You pant against her neck as you come down from your high, legs twitching. Zoya withdraws her fingers with a wet squelch, and you shudder. But she doesn’t set you down, not just yet, and you know why—or rather, you can feel why. You pull back, leaning your head against the wall, and all while keeping your eyes locked with hers, let your hand brush against the tent in her pants.
Her hips jerk at the sensation, and you smirk. She’s just as pathetically desperate as you are. You brush your hand up and down the clothed length once, then twice, before finally tugging the zipper and her boxers down just enough for her cock to spring free.
Shit, you feel yourself get wetter at just the sight. Her cock slaps against her stomach, painfully hard and big enough that you’re glad she had the control to finger you open first. Zoya growls again when you pump your hand along her length, gathering sticky pre-cum from her drooling tip and laving it down her hardness.
“Wouldn’t happen to keep condoms in here, would you?” she asks, her voice deeper than usual. You roll your eyes at the question.
“No, we don’t keep condoms in the triage room,” you answer, shifting your hips so her cock now rests against your soaked lower lips. “But we do stock morning after pills.”
Zoya’s eyes flicker dangerously, and she grips your hips tight enough to bruise. “You’re playing with fire, princess.”
“Shut up and fuck me,” you retort, moving your hips up and down and letting her cock slide between your pussy lips and bump deliciously against your clit. “I’m on the pill anyway.”
Zoya buries her face in your neck and growls, then angles her cock with your entrance and slowly pushes in. You have to bite your tongue as she enters because fuck, she’s so fucking big. You can feel the way you cunt stretches to accomodate her size, more than it ever has for anyone else and you whimper reflexively.
Zoya squeezes your hips apologetically, kissing your neck as she keeps going. “Gotta relax, princess, c’mon, just relax for me…”
You do your best, and the moment she bottoms out it feels like all the breath has been forced from your lungs. Gravity ensures you have a particularly deep seat on her cock, and it leaves both of you breathless. Zoya meets your eyes, and slowy, she starts to thrust, drawing back before snaping forward in a smooth rhythm that soon has you seeing stars.
She fucks you against the wall with as much force as she can muster without being too loud—the rest of the hospital is just outside the door anyway. She smothers your moans with a kiss, hungry and demanding, her tongue tangling against yours. With each rut of her hips her cock bullies your g-spot and you can feel the knot in your stomach tighten once more.
“‘m going to cum,” you gasp out, eyes fluttering shut from pleasure, “‘m gonna cum, Zoya, please—“
“Go on, then, princess,” she encourages, her thumb starting to work your clit again. “Cum all over this cock like I know you want to.”
You writhe against her, your cunt squeezing her length like a vise. Zoya grunts at the sensation, her thrusts starting to get choppy as she rockets to her own high. Her lips travel from your own then down to your neck, her teeth ghosting the skin there. With one last drive of her hips she buries herself deep inside you and spills her hot cum into your eager cunt, while her teeth sink into the junction between your shoulder and your neck.
Your eyes roll back into your head at the feeling of being filled by and of her, your insides being painted white as she dumps rope after rope of cum into you. Fuck, you’re going to be dripping into your panties for a while after this, but you can’t bring yourself to care as nothing but sheer pleasure courses through your veins.
You don’t know how long it takes before both of you wind down from the high, but Zoya’s still hilted inside you, and a part of you doesn’t want her to leave. You’re both a panting mess, and Zoya draws away from your neck with a breathless sigh.
“So…” she begins, and you can barely manage a noise in response. “I take it I’m clear to be discharged, doctor?”
You only answer her with a quick smack to her shoulder that has her chuckling.
(But you agree, on the condition she comes back for regular check-ups. Zoya has no problems with this arrangement.)
#sev.responses#sev.writes#[nsft]#ptn#zoya x reader#zoya smut#*claws my way to the dining table* zoya nation........ i bring thee a gift....#wrote this in delirium and it's so disjointed to me sdhlsjhdlsjhdljsj#what was the point of reader's internal monologue ?? man fuck if i know
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