#and I have been stuck here for. a while art block is a bitch

[anurarana]

My biggest character design blugh is that I struggle so much with making clothing almost too practical. Like I want to make something interesting and textured and detailed and then when I go to do that it's like. That doesn't make practical sense and now everyone is wearing normal sturdy pants and combat boots

[smuthospital]

🎃⭐️Texas Chainsaw Massacre x reader⭐️🎃

Art by: Minilev

Premise: You go hiking with a friend and this bitch has the audacity to leave you alone. You end up hitchhiking with some hippies, but their van gets a flat! Oh no! Good thing there's a farmhouse nearby. Maybe they can help

Note: I had this in the drafts for awhile. I decided to whip it out for halloween. Enjoy. Say one thing bad thats not constructive criticism and its a block. Tired of these fucking kids smh. Also, imagine everyone with a soulthern accent

-Dr. Smut

Minors DNI

Warning: Non-Con, side charicter death, mentions of gore, kidnapping, fem reader

"So uh..thanks for picking me up." You say with a nervous smile. You refrain from coughing as the strong smell of marijuana floods your nose. Right now, you're in a classic 70s Volkswagen van, hitchhiking through Texas. Your friend convinced you to go backpacking with her, but a quarterway through, she ditched you to continue the trip with her new boyfriend. Some junky she met at a gas station. You can't exactly turn tail and go home because she took the car, and stranded you in the middle of nowhere so, you had no choice, but to catch a ride with some hippies.

"No prob, sweet cheeks. Anything for a pretty lil' lady like yourself." The driver looks back at you for a moment and winks. You think he may like you. You cringe slightly. "Eddy has a crush on you! Ain't that right, Ed?" A girl next to you wearing a tie-dye crop top pokes Edds back a couple of times. "Well, who wouldn't?" He chuckles. You play with your fingers nervously. You've been driving along a dusty, desolate path through some empty part of Texas for a while now. You've always been perturbed by the idea of Texas. Americans and with their guns and hot temper and all. It seems you may have watched too many scary movies. You haven't seen a soul for miles, let alone a house, just tall grass and more tall grass.

The car suddenly jolts and you're all jostled around. The girl sitting next to you clings to you as the driver slams the brakes. You gasp for air, your heart pounding a mile a minute. "Huh!? W-what the!?" Edd shouts before hopping out to investigate. You cautiously slip out the back and join him. Edd lifts a spiked wire. It's still stuck in the now flat tire. "Some asshole must'a dropped it here while delivering somethin'," he says as he drops it back on the ground. It popped the back tires. You pull out your phone. No service. Of course.

"Do you have any spares?" You ask, hoping to get out of this creepy place. "Unfortunately these are the spares, sweet cheeks." He sighs. "Weren't you supposed to buy more, Ed?" Ann shouts from the window. "This is no time to argue! We have to get help!… Look, There's a farmhouse right there. Let's hope someone's home." He says, walking towards it.

You hesitantly follow them to the creepy house. "I'm gonna check the farm, you two knock on the door." Edd doesn't give anyone time to respond before he walks off. You walk up to the front door and Ann knocks. You feel like you're being watched. You shift from foot to foot nervously. A few minutes pass and no word. Not even a sound. "What the? Where's Edd? If no one was home, he should be back by now!" Ann looks around. You begin feeling incredibly anxious. "Let's go find that idiot," she says and walks off quickly, you follow behind her. You can't leave her to do it by herself so you agree. You walk over to the farm and see…the gate open.

"H..hello?" You call. "E-Edd?"…No response. The two of you cautiously walk into the house. It smells like wood and iron. You see a red smudge on the wall…weird. This is getting scary. "Ann…I think we sh-" You're cut off by a blood-curdling scream from Ann. You quickly go over to the open doorway she's looking at to see a horrific sight. Edd has been cut to pieces. You hold back bile in your throat and grab Ann. "Let's go!" You shout. She snaps out of her trance and follows you to the entryway, only for the two of you to halt in your tracks.

Standing there is a giant, his hulking frame filling the doorway. He's the scariest thing you've ever seen in your life. A mask covers half his face, and in his arms is a chainsaw. You make eye contact with the beast and scream. Ann yanks you deeper into the house, hoping to find an exit. The man follows you, hot on your trail. You see a back door and try to open it, but it's locked. Cassie then barely avoids losing her arm as she dodges the giant.

He hasn't tried to attack you yet. You grab a chair and smash it through a window. You pick up a plant and throw it at the man, who cornered Ann. He's completely unphased, but pauses and looks at you as if to warn you. You toss his warning to the wind and jump on his back. "Ann, go!" You scream. Ann runs towards the window but stops when another man shorter than the man you're currently on top of, smashes a hammer onto her head.

You hear a crack and she falls to the floor, limp. "Ann!" You cry. Your body was then slammed to the floor by the hulking, chainsaw-wielding psychopath. You whimper and crawl backwards. You hit a wall and he lifts his chainsaw towards you. You're thankful It's turned off. You close your eyes and wait for death. You feel the blade lightly touch your collarbone…and then gently move down between your breasts and to the junction between your spread legs…he rubs your thigh with the chainsaw lightly, as if thinking. You look up at him in confusion. He tosses the saw to the side and grabs your face in his large hand. He tilts your head from side to side, examining you.

"Think she's pretty, Tommy?" The man who just attacked Ann asked.

'Tommy', the giant holding your face grunts and nods. You're horrified. Does this monster think you're pretty? "Yeah, I agree, Tommy. Good thing you didn't turn her into dinner… though, I don't think you were gonna. You had your eye on her since their car landed in our road trap." He laughed. Trap!? This was all a setup!? Did he say dinner!? Your head is spinning.

Tommy looped his bur waist arm around your waist and hoisted you up, placing you on his shoulder like you weighed a small sack of potatoes. "H-hey! What are you doing? Put me down!" You shout, pounding your hands on his back, but it doesn't even look like he knows you're hitting him. You hear footsteps and look up to see an old woman looking over at you. “P-please help me” you whimper. She smiles down at you sweetly.

"Well, I do say, you sure found yourself a sweet little thing. Ain't that right, Thomas.” The hulking figure above you grunts in agreement. You cry as you realize she has no intention of helping you in the least. “She has a pretty voice too…Take care of my Tommy, girl!” She warns, glaring down at you. “Tommy. Get'er to pop out a few farmhands, will you?" All blood drains from your face. They…want you to…what? Tommy carries you down into a dark, creepy basement. You almost puke. You see dead bodies hanging from hooks and dismembered limbs and bones strewn about….is that Edd? You're carried down a hallway and into a room. The room is empty besides a dirty mattress in a corner. He throws you on the mattress and begins to undress you immediately.

You scream and try to stop him, but he's just too strong. "P-Please stop!" You cry. Tears flow down your cheeks and you hiccup. Tommy leans down and wipes away your tears, not calming you in the slightest. He strips you down to your bra and panties and takes a good look at you, drinking up your body. You can see the lust in his eyes. He grunts in excitement and removes his bloody apron. You curl your body up and hide yourself from him. He softly strokes your cheek and hugs you like you're a teddy bear. He's oddly gentle, but you feel he's losing patience. He taps your shoulder a few times, silently urging you to show yourself to him. when you don't, his taps become a little harder. He grunts in annoyance. He presses himself into you, trying to get closer. You feel his hard cock through his pants and try to shuffle back.

He grunts in frustration, yanking your arm and knees apart, forcing your body to reveal. You need to do something!…" Please,… don't hurt me, Tommy" He only stares into your eyes. You can see emotions swirl in his eyes before he lets go of you and stomps out of the room. Looks like he's giving you time to cooperate. You bring your hands to your face and sob. You look up. You have to get out of here! You hope to god you can do this. You get up and tip-toe towards the door as quietly as you can. You slowly open it and slide it open just enough for you to fit through, which proves to be quite difficult as it's very heavy. You don't know how the monster did it before.

You continue to quietly make your way down the dark hallway, missing the dark shadow to your side. You try not to look around too much at the carnage before making your way up the stairs. You find the window you previously broke now boarded up. You take a deep breath, preparing to make a run for the front door. You haven't heard anyone yet so you think you're still in the clear. You make it to the front door and just as you're about to try and open it, your body is slammed against the wall, your breath knocked out of you. You cough and groan. You feel dizzy. You look up to see Tommy staring down at you with a look of anger. Was he waiting for you to try to escape?

You grit your teeth before lifting your knee to knee him in the crotch, but he anticipates it and grabs your leg, lifting it. He makes space for himself between your legs and lets his large hands roam your bare midriff and up to your breasts where he proceeds to rip off your bra, revealing your chest to him. You whimper in pain and try to hide yourself, earning yourself a shove into the wall, banging your head slightly.

The corners of your eyes go dark for a few moments. Your head stops spinning when he leans down and slides his tongue up your cheek. His other hand reaches down and roughly grabs at your clothed cunt. He makes sounds of excitement once again. Saying you're terrified would be an understatement. You feel his fingers cup and wiggle around down there, not knowing what to do, but liking the feeling of doing it.

You again try to shove him off as best you can. He grunts in annoyance and moves the hand previously on your chest up to your throat. Your whimpers and please turn into choked gasps and gurgles as he squeezes. He gets even closer and you can feel something hard rub against your lower stomach. "Get her, Tommy, get her!" You hear from behind him. He grunts in response and tears off your underwear. He brings it to his nose and inhales. His eyes roll back a bit as if smelling the most heavenly scent imaginable.

You now realize he's probably never held a woman before and he's completely deprived of any sort of warm human touch. "Common, Tommy, gimme that! You get to have her, the least I should get is her undies!" His brother pleads. Tommy contemplates holding the small bit of cloth in front of him before tossing it back, which his brother catches and desperately presses to his face, moaning into the fabric like it's an oxygen mask.

Tommy grabs your hair and begins dragging you back down to the basement. You scream in pain and grab onto his hand for any relief as you're forced to the ground. "No! Please! Ahh Stop!" You cry out. He drags your naked body down the blood-crusted steps and makes his way back to the room you dread. He tosses you onto the mattress once again. By the time you manage to get up on your knees, you hear a clinking sound and turn to see him undoing his belt.

You crawl into the corner as he gets on his knees before you, his shadow casting over you. He unbuttons his shirt and lets it fall off. You now know that trying to inflict pain on him is futile. Muscles that scream he could crush you like a soda can. Not only is he as big as a fridge, but he also looks like an off-season pro wrestler. You can see a very prominent bulge struggling to free itself. The size of the tent itself is intimidating.

His eyes lock on yours as he slowly unzips his belt and frees his aching cock. You look away and feel his weight settle on the bed closer to you. You can feel his heavy breathing on the side of your face. He grabs your legs and yanks you beneath him, positioning himself at your entrance. You feel his bulbous tip rub up and down your folds. "Please…" Your eyes widen and you trail off as your eyes lower to what's prodding at your cunt. You want to look away, but morbid curiosity wins. It's almost unbelievable. His cock like himself, is too big. It's long, very thick and veiny. It looks like a beer can. You can just tell he's smiling under his mask.

He slowly pushes the tip in. You try to scoot back, but he grips your hips with his massive hands and pushes forward, but fails entry, seeming too big. He grunts in frustration. He tries again, this time managing to push the tip in. You scream. It hurts so bad. "No, y-you're too big!" you gasp, squirming in place. He holds your hips tighter and continues pushing forward, impaling you on his cock, all the way to the base.

Your mind blanks. You're unable to think cohesively. You're in so much pain. He lets out a groan of pleasure and doesn't wait for you to adjust to his size and just starts moving. It feels like your organs are moving around to accommodate his massive size. You look down to see a large bulge in your lower stomach. You whimper and groan as he thrusts. "W-why?" You croak. He looks up at you before lifting your knees, pressing them to your chest and leaning on you. Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you feel him push deeper into your womb, the tip of his cock threatening to push through your cervix. He nuzzles his face into the side of your neck, cooing softly to you affectionately while playing with your hair as if to say 'I love you'.

You cry beneath him, moans being forced from your lips as his hips plow into yours. Tommy grabs your breast, rolling the nipple between his fingers. You can hear him making happy sounds of some sort between grunts. He suddenly picks you up and gets off the bed with you in his arms, skewering you on his cock. He raises you up and down like a human fleshlight. You uncontrollably moan into his shoulder. His hands grope your ass as he starts to force you up and down faster. It feels good. You can't help but feel shame.

He grunts loudly and forces himself as deep as he can. You whine as you feel a rush of hot cum flow into you. Rope after rope, he fills you up. You feel so hot inside. Your stomach bloats from the sheer volume he fucked into you. He pants and looks at you, rubbing your cheek with his. He slowly lifts you off his cock, cum pouring from your abused cunt before setting you down on the mattress. He covers you with a thick warm blanket and brushes your hair from your face, stroking it with his thumb lovingly. If you knew this was gonna be a one-way trip, you would've brought some pillows.

[lockes-woods]

Stuck Chapter 1

Himiko feels like she's in a slump. She's been working her ass off for the past three years and it feels like she's gotten nowhere. She's stuck at her two minimum-wage jobs and is still two years away from getting her degree. Despite the support of her friends, she feels like she's falling behind. Himiko's on the brink of giving up on her dream when a couple comes along with a proposition.

(Sugar Daddy Mishanks x reader)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Another round” A deep voice calls out a midst the crowded room. Himiko looked up and caught the eye of the redhead in question. A smile broke out across his face when he noticed the returned eye contact. She recognized him as one of the lawyers from the firm up the block. There were more people at his party than normal for a Tuesday night. They must have won a case; they only ever got this lively when they won a big case. She counted at least 12 people clustered around four tables that had been pushed together. Half of them appeared to be in lively debate, one was passed out, three had left to play pool, and two were making out in the corner. She huffed a laugh through her nose before getting started on their drinks. Most were drinking beers, but a few including the redhead were drinking top-shelf rum. After pouring their drinks and opening their bottles Himiko helped their waitress load her trays up.

          “I’ll take your finest wine,” a pompous voice called to her left. Himiko internally cringed as she turned to serve him.

          “That would be our Déesse it is 4,500 berries a glass.” She responded with her best customer service smile.

          “I’ll have it,” he grunted before leaning into her space and squinting at her. “Say you look familiar.” Himiko didn’t recognize him. He was definitely not a regular here or at her other job; she would have remembered someone who was this annoying.

          “I get that a lot guess I just have one of those faces.” She laughed brushing off his comment. She turned to head to the back to grab the wine. Before she could leave his vicinity, he grabbed her right arm in a bruising grip.

          “I know who you are. You’re that skank who conned my buddy out of thousands of berries,”  he said, raising his voice.

          “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She responded calmly trying to pull her arm out of his grip, but he wouldn’t let up.

          “Yes, you do; you’re a pool shark” he seethed. His grip tightened before he continued, “I’m not leaving until you pay back what you owe.” 

          Panicked by him tightening his grip Himiko yanked her arm backwards as fast and as far as she could causing him to slam face-first into the wooden bar. Her martial arts training kicked in as she quickly rotated her wrist outward causing him to lose his grip on her. She backed up until she bumped into the shelves of alcohol behind the bar.

          “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO MY FATHER IS” He screeched clutching his now broken nose.

          “Outside of the fact that he has a bitch son who's bleeding all over my bar no.” She spits back without thinking. She could feel herself getting angry. It was alien to her; it normally took a lot to rile her up.  

          “He’s Captain Morgon of the 153rd precinct” he seethed blood running down his face staining his teeth, “You’re so fucked for this.” Before Himiko could respond two of her male coworkers materialized next to her. She could suddenly feel the eyes of her patrons on her.

          “I think it’s time for you to leave pal.” Her coworker James said stepping between them while her other coworker Hiroshi gently steered her towards the back of the house. She was vaguely aware of him yelling about the manager and demanding she be fired on the spot before his voice became muffled by the closing door behind her. Her breathing began to become erratic as the adrenaline wore off. She settled against the counter in the kitchen. Thankfully the kitchen staff had been let out for the night.

          “Let me get you some water, I’ll be right back,” Hiroshi said before going back out to the bar. Himiko trained her breath as she counted her intakes and exhales. This was the first time in a while she had to defend herself outside of competitions. She was normally able to talk her way out of situations before it got physical. Hell, half the classes she took were on sociology and psychology. She was better than this. She may have just blown her chance at becoming a social worker in one move. Himiko sighed and leaned her head back. The door that connected to the front opened again.

          “Here,” Hiroshi said handing her a glass of ice water. Himiko grabbed it and took a small sip.

          “How bad is it?” She asked looking up at him.

          “They just got him outside when I walked out; James and Marcus had to literally drag him kicking and screaming. They’re talking to him outside now.” He said, filling her in.

          “Jesus, this is a nightmare,” Himiko sighed before continuing. “I can’t afford to lose this job.”

          “I wouldn’t worry about it; from what I saw he was the one who assaulted you. If he had just let go he wouldn’t have gotten hurt.” He said, squeezing her shoulder comfortingly.

          “I guess, I’m just worried that Marcus is involved. I already have a write-up this month for calling out without coverage.” Himiko said taking another sip of her water.

          “I mean he’s just a manager; he has to run it by the owners before he fires anyone.” He responded before the door to the front opened. Both of them turn their heads to see Marcus walk in.

          “Right,” Marcus starts looking at Himiko. “Are you okay? How’s your arm?”

          “I’m fine; it’ll bruise but nothing broken.” She responded.

          “Good, you,” he said pointing at Hiroshi. “Get back out front and help James close everyone out. We’re closing early.” Hiroshi nodded before leaving the two alone in the back.

          “I’m sorry-” Himiko started before he cut her off.

          “You have nothing to apologize for; I saw the bastard grab you on the security camera. That’s how I got out there so fast.”

          “But we had to close early because of me,” she said.

          “There was only an hour before the last call. The majority of our business has already left for the night.” He said in an almost comforting tone before continuing. “He’s already been escorted off the property; he basically ran away when I called the cops.”

          “You called the police?” Himiko asked in a nervous tone.

          “Yes, if he really is the son of a police captain I want to get ahead of this before it becomes a problem. A buddy of mine who works for the police precinct we’re in is on his way. He’s going to take your statement in the back office.”

          “Okay,” she nods after swallowing the lump in her throat.

          “Also, while it’s none of my business what you do in your free time if you happened to be a pool shark, I would hope that you would only do that at establishments that did not share our clientele.” He said in a serious tone. She nodded in response rubbing her arm. The bruise had just begun to bloom.

          “Hey Marcus, you’re friends here,” Hiroshi said, poking his head through the door.

          “Ready?” he asked.

          “Yeah,” Himiko said following him to the back office.

***

Himiko groaned to herself as she grabbed her coat off the rack and exited the back of the building. Everyone outside of Marcus had already left for the night. She glanced down at her phone and saw that it was already a quarter to four. After factoring in her half-hour ride home on the subway she was only going to get three hours of sleep before she had to leave for her barista shift later that morning. She dragged her feet as she circled around the building through an alley to the street.

“Hey!” a voice called to her left. Himiko stiffened before relaxing once she saw the familiar face of the redhead from earlier.

“Hey, what are you still doing here?” she asked as she watched him snuff out the cigarette he was smoking. He pushed himself off the wall before responding.

“Waiting for you.” He said with a disarming smile. If Himiko didn’t already think he was handsome she did now.

“And why would that be?” she asked, quirking her eyebrow at him.

“I’d like to offer you my services. That is assuming you pressed charges?” he asked.

“I did.” She confirmed before continuing, “No offense, but I work here. What makes you think I could afford your services?” she asked. While the bar was not a shabby establishment it was on the cusp of the city’s center and uptown. Bartenders in center city were paid decent, but not enough to afford an uptown lawyer. He nodded in recognition before responding.

“Noted, but I have been known to work pro bono in the past. I may be inclined to do the same here. Especially when my favorite bartender happens to be involved.” he said, still smiling. “It doesn't hurt that she happens to be easy on the eyes.” He tacks on the end of his statement. Himiko could feel the blood rush to her cheeks at his compliment.

“I don’t even know your name and you want to represent me in court for free?” she asked.

“If that’s your only hang up it can be easily fixed.” he said holding out his hand, “Shanks.”

“Himiko” she responded, shaking his hand hesitantly.

“There, now that that’s out of the way how are you getting home?” he asked.

“The train?” she responded unsure of where this was leading.  

“At this time of night? I’d feel more comfortable if you took a car.” He spoke.

“What are you going to pay for it? A ride home would cost a quarter of my tips,” she said.

“Of course.” He responded seriously like it was a dumb question.

“And why would you do that?” she asked skeptically.

“You’re my client now and I take care of my clients.” He said like it was the simplest thing in the world before pulling out his phone and passing it to her. “Here type in where you want to be dropped out.”

“Are you sure?” she asked knowing that prices rise this time of night from all the bars and clubs letting out.

“Positive.” He confirmed. She typed in the address of the bodega that was on the same block as her apartment complex before handing back the phone. He quirked an eyebrow at the address. “You live here?” he asked concerned.

“Yeah, why?” She asked back.

“Nothing, it’s just not the best area.” He answered.

“I can take care of myself.” She dismissed.

He laughed in response. “I don’t think anyone would doubt that, especially after tonight. It just caught me off guard is all.”

Himiko hummed in response as a black car pulled up.

“Well, this is me.” She said, nodding to the car.

“Here before you go,” he said reaching into his blazer pocket and pulled out a card. “Here’s my business card; my personal number is written on the back if you need anything outside of business hours.”

“Okay, thanks,” she said sincerely before getting in the back of the car. She waved to him as the car pulled off the curb and headed south toward her apartment complex. Himiko settled into her seat, and the exhaustion of the day finally fully hit her. She leaned her head against the window willing herself to stay awake. She was too tired to even attempt to process the last couple of hours. She just hoped that she could at least get some sleep before her shift later that morning. She only had one class on Wednesdays so she could crash as soon as that was over. She just hoped she could last that long.

MASTER LIST

[itsbluesaint]

And here is Three from @thenumbersgameif!

Ahhh for some reason Three drawing was so hard to finish, art block is a bitch. Anyway like always I hope I did the character justice it was fun to draw curly hair again it's been a while. The Playlist for Three was so good too (I have the song mommy issues stuck in my head, thanks Lin).

Here's me hoping that I can make Five drawing faster.

[ashdumpsterpile]

ASH’S TMA HURT/COMFORT/FLUFF REC LIST 

For the gays. (And @damcrows who’s been dead for the past 24 hours. Rest in peace babe. Read some gay fic. Deny the inevitability of canon. <3)

___

the end, but the start (of all things that are left to do)  by @ajkal2

Jon wakes up.

aka. mag200 tore out my heart

(Very smol, very short, very spoiler. Def recommend for anyone who just finished the podcast.)

remind me how to smile by @tamerofdarkstars

Jon is probably fine, just hiding out somewhere while the whole murder thing blows over and that's... fine. Martin is fine with that explanation. Really. He's got plenty to distract himself - like listening through the entire What the Ghost episode library, for example. Or watching Georgie Barker's Instagram livestreams.

(Yea this was in the last rec list, but you don’t understand THE ADMIRAL GIVES CUDDLES)

Chamomile by Dribbledscribbles

Whatever the ex-tea was, if it really had ever been that last bag of chamomile Martin claimed he’d found tucked in the back of the cupboard, it was fast now.

Martin had tried catching it, chasing it, blocking its way with shoebox lids and plates and an upended footstool, but the thing was just too quick. Jon knew as well as Knew that he might have left off the attempts completely if not for the creature’s preferred game.

The game was, See How Many Times I Can Push Martin Towards Cardiac Arrest Before He Comes at Me with The Broom.

(Scottish Honeymoon Era. Adorable and weird. A vampire gets harassed.)

hey stranger by @ennuijpg

It’s a late night Tesco run, how eventful could it be? It’s not like Martin is going to run into his boss who’s wearing something absurdly different from usual and get the most acute form of whiplash possible from seeing him, right?

(Martin runs into Jon at the grocery store and has an existential crisis.)

roses roses, roses. by @judesstfrancis

Rose scented laundry detergent. Running into Jon in the breakroom. Running into Jon on his way back to his desk. Rose scented detergent. Running into Jon. Roses. Jon. Roses, roses, roses. 

(Canon enemies to friends to lovers au-ish. Martin POV. Very pining much sweet.)

go softly by doomcountry

And there is nothing else besides this. 

(More hurt/comfort than fluff. Scottish Honeymoon Era. Mild eye mutilation.)

Not Alone by @backofthebookshelf

After the coffin, Daisy and Jon are both fragile. They hold each other up. 

(Post-buried Jon&Daisy starter pack. Very hurt/comfort.)

trust my love by antlsepticeye

“you… you’re real, aren’t you?” jon whispers, the fog slowly dissipating from his mind. “it is not a trick?”

“i’m here,” martin says softly, reaching up to grab jon’s hand that was resting on his cheek, intertwining his fingers with jon’s and squeezing. he moves jon’s hand to martin’s chest, resting it over his heart. “you’re alright. i’m alright. take your time, love. let’s just take some deep breaths, okay?”

(TOUCHSTARVED JON HAS ENTERED THE CHAT.)

reaching out by Athina_Blaine

By the time things settled, when Martin had finally managed to crack through his cold shell, feel some of his old self returning to him in bits and pieces, they had found their little routine.

One that had the two of them sleeping in the same bed, making breakfast, going to the mart. Where Jon reached for his wrist while they slept, and Martin luxuriated in the gentle warmth of his fingers.  

But not one where Martin reached back. One that had Martin kissing Jon awake or taking his hand over the breakfast table, because ... Martin never had the courage to try. And then it never became a part of the routine.

And Martin desperately wanted it to be.

-

Martin and Jon have an important conversation.

(More Scottish Honeymoon Era for the soul. Hurt/comfort/fluff.)

Belabor by @janekfan​

Jon's given the position of Archivist and is falling apart at the seams. Tim and Sasha are upset and playing games. Elias is overbearing and manipulative.

And poor Martin is stuck cleaning up the mess.

(THEE first fic I ever read for tma. Season 1, hurt/comfort/fluff, and hints of Jmartin. janekfan is the absolute master of seasons 1-3 hurt/comfort. This is my favorite, but pls check out the rest of their fics.)

tea, blankets, and a damnable stubborn attitude by ivelostmyspectacles

“Are you really gonna stay here and pester Jon all evening?”

“I’m not pestering him,” Martin retorted, sounding vehement if not busy going through the cupboards. “I’m heating up soup.”

“Oh, you might as well make him another cup of tea while you’re at it.”

“Oh, good idea.”

Jon shot Tim a withering look.

(The one where Jon is ill, Martin makes tea and they watch doctor who together. Fluff 1000%.)

A Kind Hand by @voiceless-terror

Jonathan Sims was adjusting just fine, thank you very much.

In which a minor workplace spill causes Jon to realize that he might have friends.

(Ah yes, the other master of seasons 1-3 fic aka voiceless-terror being my other fav author in the fandom. This one is also season 1 hurt/comfort/fluff.)

A Weather In The Flesh by @cuttoothed

"There is a span of years where Jon doesn’t touch anyone other than the occasional hand shake. It’s not so bad. He’s never been someone who’s needed physical affection."

*

Jon has never been any good at making people want to stick around.

(More touched starved Jon! Much hurt/comfort!)

Something Old, Something New by @cirrus-grey

Months have passed, and everyone is doing better than they were. Daisy and Basira are getting married, Melanie is feeling her old self, Georgie is as much herself as she has ever been, and even Jon has stabilized on his wild fall away from humanity. Everyone is doing better.

Well. Almost everyone.

(Daisy/Barsira wedding! Melanie is a bitch and we love her! Jmartin dance! Post-canon (almost) everyone lives!)

The Weight of Love by @voiceless-terror

Jon is a restless sleeper. Martin attempts to adjust. 

(The fic where Jon is literally me and Martin attempts to sleep for 1k words.)

The Art of Conversation by @voiceless-terror

"Do you ever stop talking?"

Jon has a complicated relationship with words. Difficulties come and go.

(Jon has adhd and Martin is in love.)

Novelty by @backofthebookshelf

Jon experiences A Sexual Attraction; Martin has A Concern. They figure it out.

(Any fic that explores the ace spectrum is a 10/10. We stan all ace interpretations of jon on this blog.)

Half a Hug by Dathen

I know you weren’t going to hurt me, I trust you, he said again and again. And then a different kind of fear shone through, hollow and echoing: “Please don’t stop touching me."

-

Or: Life is hard when you're touch-starved but have trauma related to your closest friend.  Spoilers through TMA 132.

(Honestly bless every author who saw jon&daisy and was like. They’re siblings. No I will not elaborate.)

the loneliness never left me (but i can put it down in the pleasure of your company) by Athina_Blaine

It was about Martin making Jon feel safe, treasured, and loved. And it had been so, so long since anyone made him feel that way.

And, in the face of it all, Jon was starting to flounder.

(At this point I just need to make separate rec list for Scottish Honeymoon Era.)

you can watch me corrode by scarletfish

"So, how long have you been pulling this shit then?"

"I… excuse me?" Jon’s indignant, certain she can’t mean what he thinks she means.

"When was the last time you ate?"

(Georgie decides Jon and Melanie need a normal day off. Jon learns that he and Melanie have more in common than he thought.)

(Look, Melanie isn’t my favorite person in tma, but she and Jon are like THE SAME PERSON and I adore fics that elaborate on their relationship.)

Out of the Wind, In From the Cold by @ostentenacity

There are two bedrooms in the safehouse, and two beds.

For a moment, Jon considers asking to share, but decides against it with a wince. “I really loved you,” Martin had told him. Loved. Past tense. And Martin doesn’t exactly have a lot of choices right now in terms of company; it would be cruel to demand he play at feelings he no longer has just to make Jon happy.

(For a moment, Martin considers asking to share. But he dismisses the idea with a shake of his head. Jon has already done so much for him. Martin isn’t about to ask for more, especially not when it’s something he doesn’t really need. He has his right mind back, and he has Jon’s friendship. That should be enough for him. It’ll have to be.)

---

Jon thinks that Martin doesn’t love him. Martin thinks that Jon doesn’t love him. They do not, of course, discuss this. Unrequited love is already awkward enough, right? No need to dwell on it.

(THEE SCOTTISH HONEYMOON ERA FIC. IT’S ABOUT THE PINING, BEING MUTUALLY OBLIVIOUS AND FALLING IN LOVE. 10000/10.) 

I Do by @voiceless-terror

“I, um- this was supposed to be a lot more romantic, I swear.” Martin looks down at the dirty bar floor. “I had it all planned out, I-I was going to take you somewhere nice, and then we’d go for a walk in the square- I’ll still do it!” He hurries to explain, as if that’s the most pressing part of this situation. “It’ll be really nice, I’ve already hired a photographer-”

In a fit of protectiveness, Martin proposes to Jon.

(Everyone lives, Martin accidentally proposes and Jon is crying in public.) 

________

[viltrumitesuperboy]

Babysitting Job (Peter Parker x Natasha’s Brother Reader)

Sorry for any errors within the plot. I wrote this over the course of two weeks. Reader’s powers not mentioned much.

Requested by: anon Could I possibly request a Peter Parker x Male Reader, where the reader is Black Widow's younger brother and has trained in martial arts and gymnastics and the like, but also has the ability of animal shape-shifting? Maybe all the avengers meet him for the first time when Black Widow finally gets him to live with her and Peter gains a pretty big crush on him?

Word count: 3352

You trained under your older adoptive sister for years. Natasha found out that you had been born with the ability to shift into animals. She brought you to her workplace where you would be treated as a person and not as a weapon like she had. You never stayed with her after you'd trained for a few years, leaving America to take other jobs. Every once in a while she'd check up on you, asking if you needed anything or if you could help her find some information. Even miles away, she still acted like your older sister and was just as protective.

Eventually you decided to finish your education in America, staying with Natasha at the Avengers Tower. She had an entire floor to herself, but rarely used most of it. She was a minimalist to an extent. She made sure you were settled before going to her briefing late, assuring you that she wouldn't get in trouble. If anything, you were sure that she'd scold them for starting without her.

You spent the first few nights extremely uncomfortable in the new place. You had never needed to stay somewhere for a long time, and even if it had only been a few days, you knew you'd be there for a while.

After a week, you were roaming about the R&D floors and bumped into someone.

"Oh, you," Tony Stark said.

"Who do you think I am?" you asked warily.

"Natasha's kid brother, right? With the powers? Listen, I have something for you."

"Uh..."

"Here. Have you seen this?"

He pulled out his StarkPad. You watched the video he pulled up, not wanting to interrupt someone who seemed like he was always in a rush. It was a boy with a lean figure, dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants along with a mask covering his entire head. You silently applauded him for being a beginner vigilante who wore something practical considering he probably couldn't afford body armour.

"This is Spider-kid. Well, Spider-Man. But he's young, and I want to keep an eye on him. You mind helping me out? Of course, I wouldn't tell you his identity without his consent, but he agreed that he'd be fine with me giving him protection after..." he trailed off, gesturing vaguely with his hand as if you knew what he was talking about. "Anyway, you feel up to going to high school? You're young. You'll probably fit right in."

"Mr. Stark, I have no social skills. I assure you, putting me in a high school considering my powers and training is likely a danger to my mental stability and their physical well-being. I'm not going to babysit someone for you."

Tony's features seemed to soften a bit. He looked less like he was in a rush as much as he normally did. It was something he reserved for the people he cared most about.

"Look, I get it. People are hard to talk to. And I'm not saying this as Tony Stark, owner of a large company. I'm saying this as the reason I'm Iron Man. You've seen all that through files from Nat, right?" He awaited your confirmation, and you nodded. "Good. All you need to do is just be with Peter. And I'm sure you qualify to work for S.H.I.E.L.D. This can just be a mission and they'd be glad to know that my- uh, the kid is being managed by someone they can trust because at least they know Nat. It doesn't have to be anything else, not even a favour for me. Just a job."

You thought about it for a moment, then asked to see more of the videos. Stark held out the device for both of you to see and swiping through a few. You both stood there in the sunlit hallway for a while. He was barely trained and relied a lot on his powers. Maybe you could help him.

"I'll speak to Natasha today. I think I'll help you out, but talk to him first," you said finally.

"Great. By the way, I think he'd be a lot more comfortable if he knew that you were working with me," Stark said, just about to walk away. "He knows that someone will be sent to watch him, but he doesn't know who and he doesn't trust easily. He'd appreciate if you told him who you were right off the bat. Be careful."

"For him or for me?"

"Personally? For him. I think you can handle yourself."

He walked away, the device tucked under his arm as he made his way to one of the labs. It was obvious Stark cared for the boy, and you respected Stark for his efforts to make the world safer after what he'd gone through. If this was a job, this was one you'd take very seriously.

———

Your powers meant you could shift into animals, but you could also just take the attributes of any animal you knew to exist. It was much easier than turning into a large wildcat in the middle of a city street. You'd taken the climbing abilities of a gecko, leaping from another building to climb up the tower. There was a bandana covering the lower half of your face, just so you couldn't be recognised by cameras. You had just started to open the window when a reflection on the window blocked the lights inside.

"Hey, uh, what are you up to?" Spider-Man asked.

You turned to look at him, adjusting your bandana.

"Nothing, just going home," you replied, opening the window.

"Oh! Do you live here?" he piped up.

"No, but it'll be my home once I break in."

"Uh..."

"I'm just kidding. You can come in if you want. I know Stark has a soft spot for you."

"Mr. Stark? Really? I mean, I try to text Happy all the time cause I really want to tell Mr. Stark stuff sometimes but I didn't really think he actually-"

"Hey! Get inside!" your sister shouted from the kitchen.

You quickly slipped in, Spider-Man following and shutting the window behind you.

"What have I told you about coming in from there?" Natasha glared sternly.

"That there's an elevator and I should use it like a respectable person."

"Exactly. Go change and then help me out with lunch. Hi, Spider-Man. You know where to go."

"Yeah, sorry, Ms. Romanov. I didn't know you had a friend coming over."

"He's my brother. Now hurry up. Pepper will have your head if you're late."

The conversation trailed off, likely followed with goodbyes, as you went to your room. Lunch led to a very serious conversation about joining the secret government agency along with your first job: keeping Spider-Man in check.

———

The flash drive you received had the worst possible photo of Peter Parker you could imagine. It was as if they couldn't get an actual photo of him. Considering the fact that he was an official intern here, you figured that they might be able to get something that didn't look like an unfortunate accident from Picture Day. Because in person, he looked... not as stupid.

Going back to a public school was strange. You hadn't gone since you were a child, the rest of your education mixed in with the martial arts training you had to take. There were so many people, but at least they were ignoring you for the most part. The main problem was finding out where the hell B104 was.

"Um, are you lost?"

A girl with curly hair and a sketchbook to her side had a locker open next to you. You glanced at her putting books away and taking things out before responding.

"Yeah, I don't know where this is?"

She looked at your schedule, nodding as she shut her locker.

"Yeah. That's the basement. There's one science class down there," she explained. "I'll go with you; I have something there, too."

You thanked her as you both walked through the crowded hallways. She occasionally nudged people aside, giving absolutely no shits to the people standing in the way. Natasha would like her. When you accidentally mentioned it in a quiet mumble, she laughed. She claimed that if she ever met Black Widow, "it'll be over for all you bitches." You didn't doubt it. You both went down a floor and she led you to the room.

"I have to go a bit further down, but..." she quickly pulled out a pen and wrote down your room numbers on her wrist. "I have some classes close to these, so I can bring you there for the first half of the day before lunch. I'll see you after class?"

"Uh, sure?"

"My name's Michelle."

"I'm (Y/N)."

She stuck her hand out in a way that you became extremely uncomfortable with, not used to shaking hands. She seemed to notice your hesitation then held it up for a high five. You gave a small smile of gratitude and gave her one.

"I'm sorry, that's so awkward. Um, if you stick with me, I'll teach you the secrets of this school. Okay, there aren't really any, but you really look like more of a loner than I do."

You nodded awkwardly in response and turned to walk into your class without another word.

Michelle had about three of her classes with you, and you shared 4 with Peter Parker, two of which were before lunch. She walked you to the table she usually sat at, a relaxed gait to talk to you comfortably.

"Everyone kind of adopts their own spot in the cafeteria at some point. Those tables are usually empty, and that's where I sit. I have a feeling you're going to be spending your time there too."

You spotted Peter, who waved at you. Confused, you waved back, then Michelle voiced an excited greeting. You put your hand down after pretending to scratch your head.

"This is Peter and Ned. They're in some of your classes."

"Oh, you're the kid who broke one of the beakers today, right? Man, that's so weird. How did you manage that?" Ned recalled.

You weren't about to tell him that you hadn't broken it at all. It was sitting on one of the heating plates and you were trying to put it away, but it fell as you'd tried to catch it with your sticky gecko hands. It didn't work.

"I have super strength," you deadpanned.

The three laughed, somehow. You hadn't interacted with such a close friend group like this ever. Peter was an awkward teen just like the others, and you wondered how difficult it must have been for him to adjust to his powers in the middle of his schooling. If anyone noticed you staring at him, they didn't mention it.

———

You did not tell Peter that he was just your job.

He was completely oblivious to your role in his life and laughably terrible at hiding his secret. You once caught him pick up an entire row of lockers with one hand in between classes. He picked up a bottle that looked like it held arsenic and placed the lockers back down. The sunlight streaming in from a nearby classroom's glass window made you realise that this boy had no regard for his surroundings. He was incredibly stupid. You really had to tell him soon.

He'd visited the tower a few more times, and you'd sometimes see him practice with your sister. She'd look up at you in the doorway of the training room and glare at you, as if telling you that she was doing your job. You walked away before he saw you every time. Instead, you followed him around when he was Spider-Man, choosing when you wanted him to know you were there and when you didn't. You'd learned that from Natasha. He'd tried to get your attention a few times, knowing you were there, but you slipped out of sight every time.

Michelle started to ask you to call her MJ. Ned showed you pictures of the Death Star he and Peter built together. It suffered destruction twice in the past, but it was perfect now and sitting on display in Ned's home. Peter offhandedly mentioned that Tony Stark wanted to display it at the tower. Ned was all for it, and you wanted to hit your head on a wall. Peter consistently confirmed his parent-child relationship with Stark without realising it. It was a bit infuriating for everyone else who could see it.

Peter had started to become more awkward around you. He'd been more comfortable over time, but one day he just started to get fidgety and stammered a lot. It only happened when he spoke to you. You were aware that you were probably one of the very few people that he felt any romantic attraction to, and he probably felt like you were his only option. Unsurprisingly, you felt the same way. It sucked having only a few friends.

At some point the secret had to come out. You were just standing in the kitchen, opening the fridge for the second time like it would suddenly become interesting, and jumped once you closed it.

"Oh my god, Peter," you huffed.

"(Y/N)? What are you doing here?"

Your eyes darted to Natasha for help. Peter followed your line of sight to her. She shrugged and hauled her duffel bag further up her shoulders.

"I have a mission. I'll only be gone less than a week. Get groceries."

The elevator arrived in seconds and she went up, likely to the helipad. You both stood there in silence for a moment.

"That's my sister," you admitted.

"Hold on, so you're telling me the person I met sticking to a window was you? The new, awkward kid at my high school?"

"You're awkward too."

Peter began too look a bit uncomfortable just standing in front of you in plain view, like he was suddenly aware of how open he was.

"You were the one following me around the city too. When I'm Spider-Man."

You nodded, gesturing to the living room so you could both take a seat. He was quiet as you went to your room, coming back out with the flash drive you had on him.

"Stark wanted someone to watch you, and he doesn't have many younger options. Then Nick Fury apparently wanted to keep an eye on you, so it all worked out. Natasha talked to him about having me join, and you were supposed to be my mission."

"Then why didn't you tell me? Are we... friends?"

"Yes!"

Peter looked away from you and looked out the window, the same one you both climbed into a while ago. He looked down at the flash drive, his teeth biting his bottom lip. You slowly sat down next to him, being sure to keep some distance away.

"I just didn't know how to tell you. Stark said that I would have been fine if you didn't know who exactly was watching you. I didn't expect to become your friend."

He put the flash drive in between the two of you, sliding it back over. You looked at it, your stomach doing turns knowing that you never would have hurt him if you said something earlier.

"My sister's been training you because I couldn't. I've learned a lot from her, but I've traveled more than she has. And I can adjust my powers to be more like yours. If you'd still want me around, I can teach you more."

Peter stood up, holding his hand out like he was going to shake your hand. You followed suit, holding your hand up for a high five. You both switched your hand positions, then settled for a fist bump that wasn't quite coordinated.

"I know we're both a bit awkward and we don't know how to talk to people normally, but I don't think I'd ever give you up. I'd like to be more than a mission to you."

"Like a friend?"

"Whatever you want."

———

It was easier to be with Peter in the tower. You realised how little you actually know about the building, and the next few days were spent with the both of you walking to the subway together and taking it to where you lived. He always brought you up to Stark's personal floor, to both his and Stark's labs, then to the R&D floors that you stopped exploring ever since your interaction with Tony Stark. He showed you what people were working on if they allowed you both in, and you'd watch him work on projects when he figured he'd procrastinated long enough. Sometimes MJ and Ned would tag along because apparently both you and Peter vouching for them was enough for security to let them through. Of course you had MJ meet your sister. It was a terrifying experience.

You spent weeks training Peter, watching him crawl up walls and do flips with more grace than you ever could and learning from him, but also taking him down much faster than he could ever take down anyone else. He was resilient but needed the training that both you and your sister provided. And even if your sister had been doing this longer than you had, you had abilities she didn't that could match and counter Spider-Man's.

Somehow Peter got even more awkward. He was clumsy, and was only lucky he didn't break things (or his own body parts) because of his powers. You didn't really want to tell him that you knew why. If you didn't have your own response to how he felt about you, he'd think that you were rejecting him. Though conflicted, MJ decided to make that decision for you.

"Ned, wanna come with me to see Ms. Romanov while she's training?" MJ asked, slinging her sweater over her shoulder.

"Uh, I don't really-"

"We have lovebirds to leave alone. Come on."

Ned looked a little torn, considering he had either the option of staying and not letting his two friends talk alone for once or leaving and being constantly terrified of a woman and a teenage girl for hours. You felt he made the worse choice, as he followed MJ. Fool.

"Did you just call Ned a fool?" Peter laughed.

You put your hand over your mouth, but laughed with him anyway. You were both sitting on the same sofa that led to Peter finding out that he was a part of your job. His hand reached yours, putting it on top of where they rested on your lap. He pulled it towards him and held it like romantic couples usually do, with fingers crossed together. It took some struggle because you both moved your hands the same way. Once again, you shared a laugh, though this one was more strained and uncomfortable.

"You like me, Peter," you said, not an ounce of doubt in your words. "I've known behaviour long enough to know. And I like you too, but I'm scared that it's because you're the first friend I've had that wasn't my sister."

"I was supposed to say it first," he pouted. "I had those two leave on purpose!"

You laughed and lightly squeezed his hand.

"I mean, what's life if we're not going to take risks?" he continued. "You decided to go to public school after years of not making friends, and I went on a school trip, got bitten by a spider, and decided not to tell anyone. If it doesn't work out, we can still be friends, right?"

"Nat would force me to stick around you as part of the job. Keeping you around as a friend is just a plus."

"Well, don't think that I'm letting you off the hook for telling me how you feel first. I'm holding you to this." Peter pointed a finger menacingly at you, which you pushed away.

"Sorry for stealing your thunder. And speaking of thunder, Thor's coming in a few hours. You wanna hide his food and blame it on Barton?"

"Hell yeah."

[redspiderling]

You'll die on this hill huh? Blog for a racist, antisemite, transphobe, who supports paedophiles. Sorry but I don't think I can follow you anymore.

Hello to you too anon,

I don't even know how to unpack this. I'm so tired of having to answer to this fucking nonsensical narrative you guys have built. This is why if Scarlett ever went on social she'd just post a middle finger and then ghost all of you. Beyond that, it really pisses me off that you keep flooding my inbox with this bullshit. I don't come to your blog to tell you what to talk about anon. I see a lot of stupid things posted on here, but I don't go in people's spaces and say "you're stupid", because that's just not productive, and it's not nice.

But lets do this again anon, let's roll one last time, and then goodbye to you, have a nice life. Let's take it by subject:

Racist: Really? I googled racist Scarlett Johansson and literally nothing came up, other than the whitewashing accusations over her Ghost in the Shell casting. First of all, while the race of an android is something that we can go on about for a long time, and the casting of adaptations of Japanese content is another thing we can go on about for a long time (because e.g. a couple of years after GitS came out, nobody accused the actors or producers of Detective Pikachu for whitewashing, even though most of the actors on it were white), lets say I agree with you, that Scarlett shouldn't have been cast in that film. She apologised at the time, and said she wouldn't knowingly take away a role that was meant for a person from another race. After all, the role was meant to go to Margot Robbie initially, and when she dropped out due to scheduling issues, it went to Scarlett. So, the role of Major in Ghost in the Shell actually went from one white woman, to another white woman. Are you gonna go after the casting people for this, or are you gonna keep accusing Scarlett for accepting a role that she thought was meant for a white lead? You don't need to reply, it was a rhetorical question, I know you're not actually interested in figuring out how racism works in showbusiness. Lets keep going, let's say you don't believe her, and that it was entirely her fault, that at the time she took away a role that would otherwise have gone to a person of colour. Well, it's been 7 years since she was cast for that role. She's been in many, many films since then, and not once has she taken a role from a non-white person. I think 7 years is enough time passed to think this person has learned their lesson, and won't make the same mistake again.

Anti-Semite: ..................... Scarlett is Jewish, anon. She has family that died in concentration camps. See, this is how I know that you don't actually care about any of this, you just enjoy bitching on tumblr, so thanks for making my life easier. I guess I'd feel bad if I thought I actually made you uncomfortable.

Transphobe: We cannot actually know that? She hasn't made any anti-trans comments, but she hasn't supported the cause either so, who knows? Accepting the role in Rub and Tug was a mistake, and once she figured that out she admitted it, made an apology, and dropped the project. And don't make me go over the whole "I could be a tree" thing again. I can't deal. She was giving an interview for a pretentious French magazine, and the interviewer was going on and on about the art that is acting (and saying some pretty questionable things while at it), and when he asked her "what do you think is the job of an actor?" she replied that actors are people who emulate other people and can transform themselves to anyone or anything else. That was on a philosophical discussion about the actor's "job". She wasn't making a statement against trans people, in any way. She was a USB stick by the end of Lucy in 2014, she was just pointing out the obvious and then it was taken entirely out of context, and I swear my eyes will one day get stuck rolled at the back of my head, reading yet another tree "joke".

Supports paedophiles: No. What she's said is that she's known Woody Allen personally for 20 years, and that he's told her he didn't abuse his daughter, and that she believes him. That he isn't a paedophile. That is in no way "supporting paedophiles". Do I agree with this? No. I think Woody Allen is a questionable figure, at best, but I can sorta understand her position. I've said this before, I don't know how I would feel if a friend of mine was hated by the general public because he was accused of doing a horrendous crime that had actually never been proven (or disproven), and therefore I can't judge her for deciding to stand by him on this, I don't think I would have been able to do the same, but Scarlett has proven that she'll say what she believes and deal with the consequences. Fair enough.

That's it anon. Thank you for sitting around for one last rant. If Scarlett has been accused for some other shit while I was writing this, maybe for killing Kermit the frog, who knows at this point, please, don't slide in my inbox, I'm done with this and I'm certainly not above blocking. Go on and live your guilt free life, stanning white men who have done waaaay more questionable things than most female celebrities could ever hope to do in a lifetime, and yet get away from scot free for you to drool over without shame.

[soyouareandrewdobson]

…the ugly. SYAC: The Master Review 4

Last post I covered much of what I consider the good or passable strips of SYAC of the pre-Dobbear era. What I have admittedly not covered yet, were three certain characters of the strip that exist beside Dobson.

Persistent Pam

 Curmudgeonly Carl

And… this guy I am not even sure has a name.

No, seriously. He shows up in like the 61th strip of the series for the first time and yet I never see his name mentioned once

All I know is that he is an accountant, who pities Dobson (for good reason)

And despite Dobson not liking alcohol, they regularly meet up in a bar as if they are some late 80s comedy duo

Funnily enough, he shows up way before Pam, who would have her premiere in these strips

 And despite only showing up in a few strips after her premiere (mostly to make “fun” of overbearing and snarky commissioners I suppose…)

 She actually managed something no other character or series by Dobson managed to get: A fanclub

 Not that she would really be of any major importance afterwards.

As for Carl, he is supposed to be something like an antagonistic embodiment of Dobson’s “old” art teachers and people being stuck in old ways, who shows up for the following strips forming a sort of arc.

In addition, it is very obvious, that Carl is supposed to be a mockery of people flaming Dobson. Not helped by the fact that THIS character sheet of him made by Dobson assures us, that there were quite a few even less “endorsing” things he wanted to name the character.

Yet funnily enough, Carl turned into such a popular character with readers, Dobson was essentially “forced” to make him reappear in other strips. Not of the “classical” SYAC strips, but he showed up as the “antagonist” to Tenku in the storydriven multi pagers. Though even antagonist is a strong word, as he is essentially more of a jerkish art teacher and college advisor who is harsh on Tenku, but actually has his best interests in mind. To the point he even offers him to be his “harsher” art critic in the years till he enters college, because he wants to see him grow artistically.

 However, Carl was also more of an “accident”. Cause when it came otherwise to tackling criticism or things that irked Dobson (and were not anime related) he would end up more or less creating strips that painted him in a manner where he would supposedly always look like “the better” compared to his opposition or mock it. Which is where a lot of the irk Dobson would earn over the years eventually comes from.

Now to be fair, I do not want to call every comic in that regard “strawmanning”, nor do I want to say that Dobson doesn’t have the right to also mock to a certain extend the mentality of certain “snobs” and so on. For example…

On one hand, I know there are people out there who think they are “special” by having the best tools at their disposal. When in reality you can achieve good results also with less expensive stuff. So mocking that sort of attitude is fine to me to some extend

BUT, when you also make down the line a comic like this…

… essentially making yourself come off as a “better” artist or person than others because you have “chosen” the better mass produced crap (btw, that is coming from someone who types this review on a Mac that runs Windows) , then the hypocrisy ends up to be rather strong with you.

 Which is also essentially the biggest issue with the strips I am about to show. The hypocrisy of Andrew Dobson. And no, I do not mean the tumblr blog by that. I mean the simple fact, that the content of some of the soon to follow strips gets kinda muddled when you take into consideration some of the things real life Dobson had said and done either at the time or in the years to come. Well that and the way how he tries to mock issues people have with his work, not realizing how he is essentially just reassuring those “silly critics” in their opinions while making his flaws more obvious to people that may have been previously unaware of them.

But enough talk, let me just show you in quick succession examples to confirm said point.

Considering Dobson’s longterm disdain for DnD you have to wonder what the joke really is outside of him portraying DnD players as ugly nerds, supposedly too geeky even for him. Which is hilarious in hindsight as he would years later become a fan of TAZ among other things.

Less hypocritical but the set up is kinda flawed. Like, you are obviously at a convention trying to sell stuff. Why would some old dude not interested in “kids crap” be at the convention anyway? Is he just bringing someone there and just wants to go, but first needs time to belittle your life choices?

 Rather hilarious in hindsight to me. Cause for someone claiming he has ideas that last for a life time and who seems rather distraught on the idea of others giving their input, he turned out to be so in need of ideas. Alex ze Pirate e.g. became from 2015 onward only defined by Dobson talking about the sexualities of his characters (and not even in comic as by that point it was discontinued, but rather in tweets and so on). Formera, which ran heavily on cheap shonen anime tropes ended up cancelled after two volumes, Cabin Rest was a failure after 20 strips, 2019 he relied primarily on cheap comics about Miraculous Ladybug and his understanding of certain genres is so bad, he can’t even think up the most basic ideas for a magical girl story.

Weirdly enough, that pitch of a garbage truck driver who fights crime? I think that could make for an enjoyable short story about a vigilante a la the Punisher or Sin-City.

 The way Dobson perceives criticism, while also essentially giving a quick rundown how he appreciated criticism in his childhood way better than in adulthood. Yeah, because criticism by your parents as a kid was always VERY constructive. (looks back at certain drawings from own childhood) brrr. And sorry Dobson, but sometimes criticism by strangers is better than criticism from friends. Cause friends may mince their words. Plus people have over time given you quite some insightful criticism aside “U SUX” when it comes to comics. You were just never willing to listen

Hey Dobson, you hear that? That is the sound of your career, dying and no one caring.

Yeah, I think someone who made such “brilliant” comedy as in these comics, totally has the right not to listen to what seems to be solid theoretical advice.

BTW, that Talus comic… I swear to god the worst “joke” Dobson ever told.

 Wow. You essentially make a point why you suck at drawing. While still not trying to change.

And as someone else once said: Don’t play with fire if you can’t deal with the heat, BLOCK-son!

This is not how I perceived your shit over the years. See, on one hand it is true that Alex ze Pirate e.g. has its own webpage to read the comic for free. HOWEVER most of his comics Dobson would hide from the start behind a paywall. The idea being that he would e.g. put a small reading sample of 10-15 pages up somewhere and then expect people to buy his comic for full price to get the rest. And you know, if you are e.g. a professionally published writer, that is fine. But when your average art output looks like THIS

And you expect people to pay more than 10 dollars for something that is only around 70 pages long while most people can get 200+ pages for the same amount of money that look like this…

 You can frankly go and screw yourself.

On one hand I get that the joke is meant to be, that as an independent content creator you may find yourself in a weird spot where your “child friendly” work may be put in a palace between edgier stuff other creators sell at conventions. On the other hand, I find it rather insulting in hindsight, that self declared feminist Andrew Dobson portrays such competition as either psychopathic murderers or stereotypical cartoon bimbos. If modern day Dobson saw the same strip by any other person, he would be insulted on behalf of the female that she is portrayed as a bimbo, when she could also be a very smart and attractive woman who knows how to tell brave and sexy stories.

Also, I have read your “child friendly” stuff, Dobson. I would call Atea or Alex abusive bitches who like to bully orphans but child friendly? Not to forget that your work is so basic and shallow in depth, it’s like the someone tried to create a chimera out of some of the worst traits associated with Dora the Explorer, 80s toodler cartoons and the Fairly Oddparents.

I frankly hate this theory on comedy. It is true, a lot of comedy can be deprived from conflict, misunderstandings etc. Looney Tunes, Tom and Jerry and other cartoons as well as screwball comedies such as Rat Race can depend on it. Heck, one of my favorite comedians of all time is Christopher Titus, who based his entire career on the misery and absurdity of his life.

But comedy is not just defined by misery and conflict.

There are for example also the following theories when it comes to comedy…

And to get back e.g. to Titus, yes, he has build a lot of his comedy on the bad stuff that happened in his life. But he is also someone who in his comedy has build a lot of punchlines on the absurdity of certain situations he has been in life but which in a way have enriched his life positively.

 What I am trying to say is, comedy (and entertainment in that regard) does not just have to be defined by misery. And all things considered Dobson, you could have really tried to also just make comics wherein either you or your characters are just happy with their situation in life.

For example, this page from an Owl House fancomic?

I think it holds more entertainment value than your “joke” right here, despite not even telling a joke.

Simply because as a page overall, it tries to convey a positive emotion. Which is more than I can say about the strip.

Because of a lack of different level of thickness regarding your lines, which would trick people into perceiving depth, the fact that the fill bucket and shade layers can only do so much to cover for the rather monochromatic dull nature of your comic, the fact that your characters are not really all that complex and look rather simplicstic even compared to stuff from a comic like this…

And that is just coming from the top of my head as someone who never studied art. If any reader has something to add, I am willing to listen

And considering you could in later years never keep up to any release schedule, which among other things resulted in only three SYAC strips in total being released in 2016, I say go fuck yourself. Not to forget that even some of the worst newspaper comic strips out there tend to actually find a decent following and good jokes eventually, otherwise they would not manage to stay popular for years, if not even decades.

As someone who has worked internships a lot in life, I just want to say fuck you in all our names. Glad to see you having just as much respect for interns than any other scumbag on the planet. Probably even less respect, cause you know, in some places interns tend to get paid.

Also, there is supposedly an entire real world story going on about Dobson having worked at his former university at the time the comic came out and Chaz is based on a fellow intern.

Things are unfortunately rather vague in that regard and only hold up by demonstrative evidence such as the name of Chaz showing up in certain pages of the university and Dobson’s internship being mentioned somewhere.

Well, would you look at that: People have different opinions on your stuff.

There are ways to draw memes funny and then there are ways to fail at them

 You failed.

Funnily enough, that comic rings a lot truer to text than you expect. Considering how Dobson would often emulate certain aesthetics in his comics of shows that were rather passee by the time he published his stuff, plus how he will obsess over certain trends and games for years to come (like Skyrim or his Quiet Hate Boner) while also being unaware about current trends (how do you e.g. not have heard of My Hero Academia by 2018 at least once by accident?) Dobson has always been kinda late to the party. Missing the “zeitgeist” of nerd culture and as such never quite finding an audience.

Yeah, what Pam says. Not helped by the fact that yes, the floating eyebrows are real. Look at some earlier sketches or “professionally published” comics by his and you will see that each time characters get excited, their eyebrows will suddenly split into sets of three and float higher than Pennywise’s victims.

Ironically, that fits real life Dobson at the time and later on even more so than this comic version did. Sorry, but what am I supposed to call a person who has an hate boner on anime for years for superfluous reasons, made Danny and Spot a “gaming webcomic” deliberately to piss on non Nintendo fans and has admitted in some by now deleted youtube video, that he kept a list of usernames from an old forum just to remember even years later the people that were mean to him online?

 Fuck both of you. I do not expect the Sixtin Chapel in the background, but something to filll up the empty space behind you is at times needed.

The comic here is actually called politics. … ironic how things changed once a certain reality show host turned president.

Jesus Christ. I am not even that much of a Transformers fan (Prime fan for life however) but even I know that this is not supposed to be what you design the head of a Transformer like. Not even if they ever produce the Transformers equivalent of Teen Titans Go.

Too bad you still can’t stand the heat, otherwise you wouldn’t have completely disappeared last year.

When you know you are in a no win situation, and still manage to choose an even dumber option to escape. I really don’t get it. I just think the Portal reference makes the comic dated and Dobsn’s attempt at a smug face looks so stupid. Like his cheeks are falling in and his mouth is about ready to get raped by a garden hose or something.

Yeah, considering Dobson’s later constant need for safe spaces and to be in control of a situation and the narrative, which led to so many blocks over the years… if you know anything about Dobson, how this comic becomes harsher in hindsight is rather self explanatory. I just want to say one thing: There is a difference between genuine agoraphobia and just wanting to be by yourself. And I think Dobson just prefers the later on average. Which is okay, but humans still need to interact with other human beings in one form or another, even just for the sake of keeping their mental health stable. Why do you think are so many people getting depressed in times of covid lockdowns, despite many having all sorts of technical gimmicks at their disposal to at least keep boredom at bay?

And by putting himself into a bubble like that, I think Dobson has deprived himself of some of the most basic human interaction, which was likely a severe factor in his mental degeneration over the last years.

It is still a valid suggestion! Just draw some cartoon characters or a nice fantasy scenario on a mural and earn yourself some bucks. Just be sure they are not by Disney or the Mouse will tear down the school!

… Just google up the words Andrew Dobson and Samus Aran commission by ED and you will see how this comic just further shows how much Dobson seems to actually be proud of being an unproductive asshole.

 And by the way, I know that any form of artistic work takes time. Just writing these review posts takes a lot of time for me. But that doesn’t change the fact that people should post and create stuff in a timely fashion, especially when there are e.g. deadlines to hold up too. And by the way, Sloth’s don’t have fingers, they have claws!

And that is it.

Sorry if I missed anything folks, but I just saw how many pages in word this is already filling up, so I call quits for this part here right now. I think I made my point about how Dobson trying to badly deflect arguments people may make against his art and work ethics via jokes clear enough, while also showing some posts that are either harsher or hilarious in hindsight.

Next time we will however address one certain issue about our main character, that has been not directly addressed here. In the meantime, have a little fun video that shows hopefully how entertainment and a certain amount of comedy can be gained NOT via misery.

[thedreadvampy]

Sam and I were inventorying some of his old Mechs merch (posters and CDs and Kickstarter perks) bc he's considering selling some to someone who'll get some use out of it instead of it sitting in a cupboard

and it inspired me to look at my own CDs and I'm just OVERWHELMED WITH NOSTALGIA looking at my signed OUAT CD

it makes me miss hanging out with them a BUNCH, I haven't had a proper conversation with Jonny in maybe years just because we don't tend to be in the same place at the same time, and that sucks because there was a good chunk of time where I think Jonny was the person in the band I spent the most time chatting with and firing ideas around with. Same with Tim and Frank, I love them but I haven't seen them in ages (I had plans to catch up with Frank in like March but alas, coronavirus)

anyway this is a blast from the past and a memory of a time when they really had some time to spare just goofing off while signing CDs, I think a lot of OUAT signed CDs have this level of goofy in-character annotation.

(images under the cut)

"reluctant thanks" rude bitch

[image description: the cover of the Mechanisms album Once Upon A Time (In Space), a red page with a bookcloth texture and the title, band and logo printed in black. Over the top, somebody has written in black marker "To Ruth, with reluctant thanks, The Mechanisms"]

Jonny has annotated throughout in green. I'm not sure who's making notes in red block capitals - from tone I'd guess probably Tim or possibly Ashes. The small red writing is Ivy.

[Image description: half of a double page spread with small portrait photographs of three of the seven band members (Jonny d'Ville, Gunpowder Tim and the Toy Soldier) facing the camera, accompanied by short bios. Each member has signed their character's name next to their photo in black marker.

Next to the photo of Jonny D'Ville, the rank of "first mate" has been crossed out in green ink, and over the top is scrawled in green the word "CAPTAIN," with arrows pointing to his photo. In small red cursive, Ivy has written "citation needed" next to it. Somebody else has written in red block capitals "still first mate, Jonny"]

[Image description: An image of the facing page, with photos and bios of Ashes O'Reilly Drumbot Brian, Ivy Alexandria, and Nastya Rasputina. Drumbot Brian is a young man wearing a top hat with goggles around it. Somebody has added dots to the lenses of the goggles to make them look like googly eyes. Over the photo is written "yum, head" with a line leading to the hat. Below that, there is a photo of Ivy Alexandria. Her role is listed as "archivist", but an arrow is pointing to that word, and somebody has written under it in block red capitals, "stuck-up know-it-all"]

these absolute dorks

(I think the Tetris blocks might be a reference to the video the complete history of the Soviet Union to the tune of Tetris, which Ben at least once demonstrated a party trick of picking up any instrument and playing)

[Image description: The left half of a double-page image, a painting of the characters from the album. A pale-skinned woman with long black hair in profile looks out to the left, superimposed over an image of a man in a long coat, arms spread towards a sky from which bright lights fall in steaks and explode around him. Somebody has drawn over each falling light in black marker, turning them into Tetris blocks. Along the side, Jonny has written in green block capitals "I'm so high!" and under that is written in red block capitals "Jackie in the sky of exploding diamonds"]

[Image description: the other half of the same image. A woman with tanned skin and short choppy bright red hair looks out to the right, superimposed over a loose impression of flames and a wizened old man in an ermine robe sitting in a white throne, bordered at the bottom by three black iron pig masks with glowing red eyes. In thick green marker, Jonny has drawn angry eyebrows onto the old man and put a blob of green pen over his mouth. He has a speech bubble extending from his mouth in green pen, saying "fear me, Ruth!" Underneath, in red capitals, another person has added "and my horrible taste in makeup!" There is another green arrow pointing to the pig masks, next to which is written in green "Angry Bacon". Under that, the red writing has added "also stabby"]

the context needed here is that I have SO MANY DISABILITIES and as my big brother, Morgan KNOWS I have so many disabilities and is also contractually obliged to bully me. hence "she has those?" under "healthy organs"

[Image description: A page of the album booklet, titled "About the music," which lists all the songs on the album, with notes on the songs' origins. Under the track "Rose Red", it says "sung to a tune of the folk song with the same name, probably C17." Jonny has crossed out "C17" and replaced it with "2028 AKC". Under "Laid In Black," the final track, is written "a lament to the 1901 tune of Fifteen Men On A Dead Man's Chest, a pirate sea song written by Robert Louis Stevenson". Jonny has annotated this so that it reads "a hilarious lament". At the bottom of the page there is a note reading "Lyrics and arrangements by The Mechanisms." Jonny has crossed out the words "The Mechanisms" and written underneath in green capitals "me." Alongside, someone has written in red block capitals "fuck off, Jonny"]

[Image description: a credits page from the album booklet. The first line reads "The crew of the Aurora would like to thank the following for their contributions." The word "thank" is crossed out in green ink and replaced with "maim". The next line thanks Curious Magpie Photography for photographs. The following line (referring to me) says "Ruth Wilkinson, for art." Jonny has crossed out "art" and written in, in big green capitals, "all her healthy organs." Under this, Ivy has written in small, smudged red cursive, "she has those?" The next line thanks Granny Flat Studios for music. The following line reads "Dr Camilla, for not killing us (permanently)." Jonny has crossed it "not killing us permanently" with a thick green line, and written in "fucking off!" In small red caps, someone has written next to it "shouting won't help, Jonny. Though it is fun." The page concludes with a list of Kickstarter contributors, and is signed off in print with "The Mechanisms". Jonny has crossed out "The Mechanisms" and written in "JDV"]

[elentiyawhitethorn]

Sneaking Around | Chapter Six

Aelin clicked on Rowan’s contact. want to get out of here? She made sure to keep her phone angled away from Manon, who was smirking next to her.

A moment later, he responded. I thought you’d never ask.

you’re not still pissy about me judo flipping you?

I’ve come to terms with the fact I’ll just have to get you back for it. Aelin blushed at the implications.

“What, is your sweet boyfriend sexting you?” Aelin had almost forgotten Manon was there.

“Shut up.” we’ll see about that

I’ll leave now. You come in a few minutes.

alright

You sure you remember where I live?

yeah, i think so

Aelin heard Rowan’s voice distantly saying he was off. Not wanting Manon to put it together, she started speaking. “So, you don’t mind if I ditch you?”

“And have you spend the night lusting after some dude? No thanks.”

“You’re one to talk. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve gone to gay bars as your wingwoman.”

“That was only a few times and I am grateful, but I still get to tease you. It’s my job. Shouldn’t you be leaving now?”

“So anxious to lose my delightful presence?” Manon rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’m off now.”

They walked into the living room to find Rowan already gone and Vaughan on his way out. Good, that would be a little less suspicious if several people were leaving. Aedion and Lysandra had rejoined the group. Manon said, “Aelin’s headed out to her secret boyfriend’s place, so looks like I’m stuck with you losers.” Yes, Manon was very genteel.

Everyone tried to get her to spill, but Aelin just said, “See you Monday.” Then she flipped them off as she walked out the door.

The drive was short, but Aelin was jittery, desperate to get her hands on Rowan. And she had unintentionally memorized his address.

She walked up the stairs to the second floor quickly. Aelin lacked the patience for an elevator ride right now.

Upon reaching the landing, she caught sight of Rowan leaning against the wall next to his open door. “You certainly got here quickly. So eager to-”

Aelin cut him off with a hungry kiss. His lips began to move against hers and he grabbed her, pulling her into his apartment. Rowan kicked the door closed, then pinned her to it. He used one hand to lock the door and the other to unzip her jeans. She grinded against his hand, bucking her hips forward.

Rowan pulled down her jeans, waited for Aelin to step out of them, then picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. Aelin shrieked as he carried her to his bedroom.

“That’s what you get for judo flipping me.” The damned bastard was chuckling.

He tossed her on the bed, then swiftly unclothed himself. Rowan looked up to find Aelin had done the same, and was now lying seductively on his bed. She let her legs spread.

Rowan, panting now, climbed on top of her. She moaned as his hips pressed against hers. Neither one of them could get enough of the other. Both of their hands were roving accross the other’s body. Aelin’s tongue parted his lips.

Her hand drifted down to caress him, and Rowan groaned. He let Aelin push him off of her then move down to take him in her mouth. Rowan moaned Aelin’s name. Yes, she could get used to this.

-

Light was streaming through the curtained window. Aelin awoke to find Rowan’s arm around her. She was pressed into his side, fitting like a glove.

Aelin gently slid out of his grasp, then put on his shirt from the night before. It was so large, she nearly drowned in it.

Then she walked out to the kitchen. If he was going to carry her around like a sack of meat, she would feel no qualms about raiding his fridge.

Rowan walked out ten minutes later in another pair of sweatpants to find Aelin dressed in his t-shirt, devouring a bowl of cereal. “Make yourself at home, why don’t you,” he said sarcastically.

“Thank you, I will,” replied Aelin. “Though I’m rather disappointed to find all this health junk. You need to buy some Fruit Loops.”

Rowan smirked. “Planning on eating breakfast here often?”

Aelin blushed. “Just in case.”

Rowan poured himself a bowl of the “health junk.” “Well, I wouldn’t mind if you did.”

Aelin blinked, then smiled.

“Did you ladies really sign up for mixed martial arts?” he asked.

Aelin laughed. “Yes. Lys and I had been taking it for a while, and we convinced the others to join. And I still can’t believe you bet against me!”

“How was I supposed to know you’re a fucking ninja?”

Aelin laughed again, louder this time. “I like that almost as much as fire-breathing bitch-queen.”

“That was meant to be an insult when I came up with it.”

“That makes it even better.”

Aelin hadn’t felt so happy in a long while. They finished breakfast, then Aelin said she should leave.

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?” Aelin asked.

“You should stay. It’s still the weekend.”

Aelin’s heart raced. “And if I were to stay, what would we be doing?”

Rowan’s sultry smile was answer enough.

-

Aelin pulled up at her apartment just past six o’clock. She had totally lost track of time, though she didn’t regret it. Rowan had spent the better part of the afternoon coaxing noises from her she didn’t even know she could make.

Upon entering, Aelin found Ansel at the table eating Chinese takeout. “I wasn’t sure you were coming back,” she said with a raised brow. “I got extra in case you did.” Ansel gestured to the other container of Chinese.

Aelin replied, “Thanks. I need to change first.” She was still wearing last night’s outfit. Again. This was becoming a habit.

When Aelin came back out in a t-shirt and yoga pants and sat at the table, Ansel just looked at her. Stared, like she was seeing deep into her soul.

“Okay, you’re going to have to stop that. It’s freaky,” Aelin stated.

Ansel sighed. “I’m working on my tell-me-all-of-your-secrets stare. Ugh, just fess up, will you?”

Aelin tried not to laugh. “No. Stop prying.”

“I know I blab a lot, but if I swear not to tell a soul, will you at least answer, like, some minor questions? I have nothing else to do with my life.”

Ansel looked so pathetic that Aelin hesitated. “If you won’t tell anyone, you may ask some things. I might not answer, though.”

Ansel immediately brightened. “Great. Okay, I’m assuming his name is a no. Mm, do you like like him?”

Aelin could only imagine if Ansel went and told the others, including Rowan, that she liked the dude. That would be humiliating. Ansel wouldn’t break her word, though. “Yes,” she answered firmly, surprising herself. She realized she did like Rowan a lot, though.

Ansel smiled. “Interesting. I can only assume he works at the office because of your secrecy, not to mention hooking up with him at an office party. Do I know him?”

Most everyone from the office went to the bar; this wasn’t a revealing question. “Probably.” Okay, definitely, but whatever.

“Is he good in bed?”

“Gods, Manon asked the same question. You perverts. Yes, he is very good in bed.” Aelin was tiring of the interrogation and also started to get nervous she might reveal something. “I’m done with the probing now. Want to watch Grease?” The two of them lived for old movies. They had seen Grease about a dozen times already. She knew the offer would be enough to get Ansel off her back.

“Sure. I’m not done with you, though.”

Aelin rolled her eyes. Then they spent the evening watching movies and gossiping about their friends. Luckily, Ansel seemed to have dropped the subject of the secret boyfriend for the night.

Yes, it could be troublesome to deal with her friends’ inclination to snoop, but she and Rowan would tell them if it got serious. Was it heading in that direction? At first Aelin had thought the attraction was purely sexual, but then they talked and laughed he made her heart flutter and Aelin wasn’t so sure anymore. The only question was whether Rowan felt the same about her.

Out of pure desperation, Aelin pulled out her phone. help im bored.

If Rowan was the type to use emojis, he surely would have sent an eye roll. He wasn’t though, and he annoyingly wouldn’t stop using correct grammar and punctuation. Prick. Only a minute after Aelin texted him, Rowan replied, What’s Ansel doing? Is she still at Fenrys’?

she’s currently laying on my lap sound asleep. not before finishing the fried rice though

Poor thing. Aelin could feel the sarcasm oozing out of that text. What do you want me to do about it?

be entertaining. tell a joke or something. im lonely

You’re a very needy person.

i am not

You certainly were today. Aelin blushed at that.

tell me rowan whitethorn is not sending me dirty texts! i should block you or something

Needy and overdramatic. No surprise there.

you need to work on your flattery skills

Fine, then, Your Majesty. You are the most genteel, sensitive, kind, and respectful person I have ever met. Please accept my sincerest apologies. Aelin snorted at this.

*sigh* you could at least try to say something accurate like awesome or fascinating or something. we all know im not nice

How true.

stop bullying me. ask me on a date

Is that an order?

yes

Would you like to go on a date with me?

hmm... i’ll have to think about it

Why do I even bother?

because im irresistible

I’m going to sleep now. Work tomorrow. You should too.

night

Goodnight.

Rowan was right; she should get some sleep. Even if she wanted to text him all night.

“Ansel, up.” Aelin poked her on the forehead. “I can’t get up with you snoring on my lap.”

Ansel was nearly impossible to rouse. Aelin settled the matter by shoving her off onto the floor, which earned her a severe scolding.

In bed, Aelin couldn’t stop thinking about Rowan. It got to the point where she couldn’t help but shove her hand under the waistband of her yoga pants, getting off with the help of the thought of his capable fingers.

Great. Now Aelin was just praying she wasn’t going to start blushing and batting her eyelashes at him. She wondered if he was thinking about her as he touched himself. Probably not. He was probably asleep, untroubled by thoughts of her.

Rowan Whitethorn was distracting Aelin from... well... everything. Maybe if she tried thinking about when they hated each other. Or when she judo flipped him. Yes, think of beating him up.

How was Aelin going to handle work tomorrow, being able to see him but not touch him? Rowan Whitethorn. Damn him.

[hi-i-love-u-bitch]

Azula the good sister AU (AKA the Fire siblings have a healthy relationship AU)

I’ve just finished binge watching Avatar the Last Airbender and I already have an AU ready in my head. Please enjoy my ridiculous rambling!

Azula is still really tough and intense but she isn’t a fucking psychopath like in the series

She’s still a bending prodigy and “daddy’s favorite” but the latter isn’t something she wanted or strived for

She shows affection by teasing people, but she is also fiercely loyal and protective over the people she cares about. Like she’s nice but she’ll still cut a bitch if they hurt her friends and brother.

As most siblings do Azula and Zuko like to playfully argue and insult each other:

Zuko: *having just woken up*

Azula: wow you look like shit

Zuko: big talk coming from a midget with rat nest hair

Azula: at least I only look like this in the morning, you willingly keep that rat tail on top of your head. No wonder you have no friends!

Zuko: oh yeah what’s your excuse then?

They’re the type of siblings that in a modern-day setting would send each other a picture of a toaster saying “I found you a new bath bomb”

She absolutely adores her older brother and Zuko took his role as older sibling in stride even if Azula could practically take care of herself

They’re great training partners

Their favorite memory as children was feeding turtle ducks with their mother, they still do so even now after she’s gone

When she overheard her grandfather ordering her father to kill Zuko she left to tell her mother immediately afterwards she snuck into Zuko’s room to cuddle with him in bed claiming that she’d had a nightmare.

Their mother came in to kiss them goodbye goodnight before disappearing into the night. Zuko had been half asleep so he had no idea what was going on but Azula did and she knew what her mother was about to do. She didn’t know what the outcome would be but she knew that it would be the last time she’d ever see her mother.

Azula never told Zuko what happened only that it was all their father’s fault

It was then they began mutually hating on their father

Of course, they had no choice but to respect him as he was still the Fire Lord and could possibly kill them. But as soon as he was out of ear shot the siblings were like:

Azula: Why the fuck did he think growing out his beard was a good idea???

Zuko: He looks like a goat-pig

Uncle Iroh treats them both as his own children and helps them perfect their fire bending as well as teach them the art of tea brewing. Zuko still thinks it’s stupid but Azula becomes just as much of a tea fanatic as her uncle

Azula has had a giant crush on Ty Lee ever since they were children and everyone, but Ty Lee knows about it. On the flip side Ty Lee also has a giant crush on Azula ever since childhood and everyone but Azula knows about it.

Azula: That's a sharp outfit, Ty Lee. Careful. You could puncture the hull of an empire-class Fire Nation battleship, leaving thousands to drown at sea, because it's so sharp.

Ty Le: *confused but happy that her crush complemented her* Gee thanks Zula.

Azula: *later, screaming into her pillow* I’m such an idiot!

Zuko: *sitting beside her, sipping tea* Yeah, you really are.

The day Zuko was challenged to Agni Kai Azula told him that he was an idiot and that he better kick that loser general’s ass or it would be an embarrassment to both their training. It was her own way of telling him to be careful and that she was rooting for him.

When she found out that it was her father challenging Zuko to Agni Kai she had to be held back by Iroh to keep her from jumping into the arena to help her brother

Azula was determined to join her brother in his banishment but Zuko wouldn’t allow her, saying how it was his fault for speaking out of term and that his sister shouldn’t have to suffer from his mistakes.

They had a big fight after that because the siblings were nothing if not hotheaded and stubborn. Zuko didn’t want his sister to leave all she knew behind just because of him and Azula didn’t want to be stuck doing nothing while her brother suffers alone.

They parted there days later, regretful, angry, and sad. They didn’t necessarily apologies (let’s be honest what kind of siblings apologies to each other) but they did start writing letters to each other, which was their way of saying that they were cool now.

Zuko wrote to her about his journey to find the Avatar as well as Uncle Iroh’s ridiculous jokes and tea ramblings while Azula wrote to him about how things are back home as well as potential places where the Avatar could be located.

Both aren’t sure if the Avatar even exists anymore, but they keep hoping as it means that they will one day be reunited with each other.

The day Zuko found the Avatar he entrusted only his sister with the information as he knew that once word got out that the Avatar was still alive it would be an all-out man hunt.

Everything works out relatively the same as in the series except with Azula helping out her brother in the background. She’d secretly send her brother information about general Zhao’s whereabouts so as to avoid him as well as any resources he needed for his journey.

When Ozai ordered Azula to go retrieve her brother and uncle she was both delighted and terrified; she was happy to see her brother again, but she didn’t want to take him as her prisoner. So of course, she came up with a plan.

The first thing Azula said to her brother after two and a half years apart was: “Wow, you look like shit.”

He replied without missing a beat: “Big talk coming from a midget with rat nest hair.”

They hug for the longest time and in that moment, she quietly resights her plan to him: They had to pretend to escape from her and go into hiding. She’ll pretend to hunt him down and he’ll somehow manage to escape from her clutches every time. All the while they’ll work together in trying to capture the Avatar.

She enlists the help of Mai and Ty Lee telling them the minimal amount of information just in case things go south they can plead manipulation. Of course, Mai and Ty Lee are ready to go down with their captain/friend no matter what, but they don’t mind being out of the loop for the time being. They trust Azula and know that everything she does is to help her brother and uncle.

The events leading up to the battle of Ba Sing Se are pretty similar up until the part where Zuko makes a choice between helping the Avatar or his kingdom. He’s realized the pain and terror his ancestors have installed in the world; tearing away hope for a better future.

Just as Azula was about to strike Aang with a finishing blow Zuko stops her, telling her what they’ve been doing is wrong and if they want the world to prosper, they need to help the Avatar.

Azula was a bit annoyed seeing as she went through the trouble of sneaking into Ba Sing Se and taking over the earth kingdom from the inside out. But then again, her brother was right as she already knew of her father’s end game plan.

Azula: Zuzu, I love you, but couldn’t you have told me we were going to rebel against father sooner so I could have planned accordingly.

Just as there are loyalist to the Fire Lord there are also loyalist to the Princess as they see her as a more fit leader than the current ruler. And thus, that is how team Avatar was able to get a good portion of the fire nation army on their side.

Ba Sing Se has now been established as their main base with the entire city now having chosen the side of the Avatar.

At this point Azula still had Suki and the Kyoshi warriors held prisoner close by so she was able to bring them back without much fuss.

Azula: Er, sorry for imprisoning you and stuff. I just needed to save my stupid brother but we’re on your side now. Cool?

Suki: Only if I get to punch you in the face as hard as I can.

Azula: That seems fair.

Katara does NOT trust Azula and Zuko which is fine because Azula doesn’t trust her either but she knows they need to work together if they want to even have a slim chance of beating her father.

Katara: You might have everyone else here buying your ‘transformation,’ but you and I both know you’ve struggled with doing the right thing in the past. So, let me tell you something right now. You make one step backward, one slipup, give me one reason to think you might hurt Aang, and you won’t have to worry about your destiny anymore. Because I’ll make sure your destiny ends right then and there. Permanently!

Azula: Right back attcha bitch!

Toph and Azula get along swimmingly which both amuses and terrifies Zuko because one: he’s glad that his sister is finally making somewhat normal friends but two: those two together is just chaos incarnate

Ty Lee also really bonds with the Kyoshi warriors who teach her some of their fighting techniques in exchanged for her teaching them some chi blocking moves.

Suki and Mai start getting cozy with each other with Suki liking Mai’s skills and straightforward attitude and Mai admiring Suki’s confidence and bravery. It’s easy to talk with each other.

Sokka, at one point: Why the hell don’t we just send the girls out to defeat the Fire Nation? We’re all completely useless compared to them.

Also after a few month working together Zuko can now join his sister in her gay screaming

Azula: Did you seriously fall for that Water Tribe boy?

Zuko: You’re one to talk!

Azula: Hey! Ty Lee is an angel and we’re all lucky to have her!

Zuko: She once ate a whole bowl of fire flakes by herself and had to get her stomach pumped.

Azula: Look, what Fire Nation teen hasn’t done that at least once

Zuko: She did it THREE times!

Once the siblings and Co finally bond well enough with team Avatar tension lessens and their attitude go from: “uhg, I guess we have to work together or whatever” to “you are my friend now and I would die for you! I would literally commit murder if you asked me to, no questions asked”

Aang is baby and the Fire squad has now joined in the “Aang protection army” and in a similar fashion team Avatar have also learned that Ty Lee is baby and have now joined the “Ty Lee protection squad”. Even though Aang and Ty Lee are perfectly capable of taking care of themselves one cannot help but want to protect and care for the literal ray of sun shines.

Zuko and Sokka still have their epic rescue adventure to the boiling rock, with the extra help of their team. They sneak into the facility with disguises, Azula and her crew walk in like they own the place (news of her betrayal to the Fire Lord has yet to reach certain places), while the rest of team Avatar keep watch from afar just in case things start going south.

You know that scene where Zuko gets put in the freezer and when Sokka goes to let him out Zuko breathes out a breath of fire with a smirk? It was then and there that Sokka realized that his teeny tiny crush on Zuko might actually be a giant massive crush.

In this AU it is actually Azula that helps Katara track down the man that killed her mother because let’s face it, no matter what universe she’s in Azula will always be down to beat a bitch is ass.

This is the first time Azula has ever witness somebody blood bending and unlike most people that would usually freak out she was actually really impress and kind of turned on.

Azula: You know if I weren’t already madly in love with Ty Lee, I’d ask you to marry me in a heartbeat.

Katara: And I would accept that offer if only for the pleasure of rubbing it in your dad’s face

Azula: Why didn’t we become friends sooner?!?!

It is then the Little Sister alliance was formed in which they teamed up to poke fun at their bumbling brothers who keep awkwardly dancing around each other.

Their friendship can be summed up to: “I will kill you where you stand but also I respect you”

Okay, Imma just say this right now: Sokka is a fucking badass and even after getting taught how to fight by the Kyoshi warriors and the Fire sibling + Co. he reached a whole new level of badassery once he learned the ways of the sword by Master Piandao. Zuko’s little gay heart could only take so much and Sokka being all cool and collected while wielding a sword made the former Fire Prince short-circuit.

Zuko, in his tent, face down screaming into his pillow: Uhg, I can’t with this boy anymore!

Suki, rolling her eyes at her best friend’s melodramatics: Pull yourself together man.

Ty Lee, patting his head reassuringly: Don’t worry, you’ll get through this.

Azula, sipping tea beside him: This wouldn’t be happening if you just asked him out already.

Zuko: Don’t you fucking start with me hypocritical bitch!

Azula: *nervous gay drinking*

The day of the final battle Azula and Katara lead Hakoda’s army plus the Kyoshi Warriors to reclaim the fire nation capital while Aang, Zuko, Sokka, and Toph chased after the Fire Lord and his war ships.

The battle to take back the capital was brutal as there was still an entire army keeping guard with one of the Fire Lord’s generals acting as temporary leader. Unfortunately for them Azula still had a reputation of fear amongst the Fire Nation army and a lot of soldiers surrendered once they realized it was her leading the invasion and not the Avatar. Those that didn’t surrendered were defeated in battle because let’s be honest with a team this fierce there is no way in hell they couldn’t not win.

There’s also a scene where Azula is fighting off the general and a bunch of soldiers and it seems like she’s not gunna make it but she does, bloody and bruised but victorious. I imagen in that moment Ty Lee goes running up to Azula, jumps into her arms, and kisses her right then and there, while they’re still in the middle of battle. It’s super cool and romantic and it seemed to give Azula more energy than Sozin’s comet ever could as she seemed now ready to defeat god.

Azula: Y’all bitches be fucked now! I ain’t afraid to die but now that I gotta girlfriend I’m not going nowhere fuckers!

With Aang and his team it goes about the same as it did in the show; take down the ships, battle the Fire Lord, almost die, etc. That scene where Sokka thinks that Suki died on the aircraft is now replaced with Zuko almost dying then coming back to save their asses at the late minute. They too also kiss once they see that the other is unharmed while Toph rolls her eyes and gags at the sight.

Again, Aang does not kill the Fire Lord and instead takes away his fire bending powers before locking him in prison to rot. The fire siblings come by sometimes to annoy the shit out of him by flicking fire flakes at his head for target practice or psychologically torture him with excruciating detail of how they’ve been thoroughly fucked by their significate others in is bed and on his thrown.

Zuko: How’s it feel knowing that not only are both your kids gay but they’re also bottoms?

Ozai: *screams*

Azula: Ty Lee also fucked me atop your war room table :)

Ozai: *screams intensify*

In the end Zuko really doesn’t want to be Fire Lord so he happily passes that torch on to Azula who only agrees to take the job so long as Zuko becomes her second in command. Everyone is happy and with a lot of hard work throughout the years there is finally peace amongst the four nations.

[cutie1365]

God i need to fucking rant about this bitch. How do I always get stuck with the shittiest fucking roommates man.

I’m tired of two faced bitches who say one thing to you and turn around and do the complete opposite.

Why can logic and common sense not get through to this bitch????

First her mother destroys my furniture by fucking spray painting it! Spray paint! Without my knowledge or permission! These fucking back woods idiots who wouldn’t know their head from their ass.

They moved all my boxes and furniture without me knowing and left shit everywhere and somehow my shit ended up in their car six hours away and if I wasn’t on my shit they would have stolen it and I would have never gotten it back.

All my furniture was damaged from them throwing it about and leaving it in the hot sun outside. My TV was laying in the yard for an hour unwatched in 100 degree heat. How it wasn’t stolen is beside me.

Then this bitch thinks it’s smart to have a 145lb dog and leave us to watch it while she works 12 hour shifts. We’re not ur fucking babysitter.

And when we tell her it’s not our responsibility to watch her dog SHE HAS THE AUDACITY TO YELL AT ME. Talking bout how we knew she had a dog. Yeah bitch YOU have a dog, not me. Not my other roommates. Your fucking dog. Not our job to babysit and let it out to piss and see what’s wrong when she’s crying locked in her shoe box room.

She agreed to wipe the dogs paws when she brings her in from outside so we don’t track the dirt into the house. Before we moved in we discussed this. She said YEAH NO PROBLEM. Then when she never once did it- we said what happened to that huh we talked about that. She says “Why would I do that? It’s a dog we’re gonna get dirt inside”. Bitch I know you live in a fucking pigsty in the middle of butt fuck no where but here we don’t want to be stepping in mug and grass in our fucking living room.

She said she’d sweep up after the dog a few times a week because she SHEDSSS like crazy. Yeah she’s never once swept and when we brought that up she says “we’re not gonna have a spotless house what do u expect”. Bitch the other three of us are cleaning up after ur ass all the time. You may be used to living in filth because you’ve never cleaned anything a day in your life, but we like to not collect a pile of dog hair on our feet just from walking from one end of the living room to the other.

So she yells, and I don’t take shit so I yell back. Bottom line, take care of your own dog we’re not doing it for you.

She’s also killing the poor dog. She’s locked up without peeing for 12 hours a day, gets no exercise. She never talks her. Then when she comes home she lets her out then goes into her room and falls asleep so the dog basically is in the tiny room 24 hours a day with no exercise. She’s a fucking Great Dane. The room is so small she can only lay on the bed all day.

And she feeds her 20 count Chickfila Chicken nuggets. That’s so bad! And this is a regular thing. Not like a treat every once and a while. Human food all the time. The dog won’t eat her dry food anymore. She’ll just dump whatever’s in the fridge into the bowl. I once saw her feed the dog tortilla soup. TORTILLA SOUP.

Here’s the fucking kicker- SHES TRYING TO BE A VET. This woman is killing her own dog and she thinks she can go take care of others.

She also has the vocabulary and reading comprehension skills of a 2nd grader and you think you can survive higher education. She thinks she’s fucking god and shits on people in liberal arts colleges or other degrees besides hers, yet she can’t write a two page paper.

She needs to realize she has 3 other roommates. We talked about keeping the common space free of clutter and personal items so that everyone can use it and it stays clean. She agreed. Then she put a huge fucking dog bed in the living room after we explicitly said were putting a big plant here. (The dog has never sat in it because it’s locked in the room all day). And so when my roommates propose a compromise of leaving the bed in her room and taking it out when she’s sitting out in the living room she said “no, I’m not budging). You fucking cunt. She’s doing it just to pisss me off I swear. It has never been used, it is a waste of space, we are putting something else in that spot, it’s ugly, and it SMELLS.

HER WHOLE ROOM SMELLS SO BAD THAT IT LINGERS INTO HALF THE LIVING ROOM. And her room is right by the front door so it hits u right when u walk in. I swear I think that dogs peeing in her room. You’d think someone died in there.

The dog vomits and has diarrhea alll the time cuz she feeds her shit. That poor dog is gonna die because she’s neglecting her.

AND THEN

AND THEN

The day after this conversation of “you haven’t followed thru on any of the things we agreed on before and the dog is ur responsibility not ours, we’re not taking care of it for you”.... SHE BLOCKS ME ON TWITTER.

My other roommate wakes me up to show me she turned her twitter private and kicked me off then posted some big rant and said “Friendly reminder that NO ONE has the right to not treat you with kindness. You are loved, appreciated, and deserve to be here as much as anyone else. In the midst of this pandemic, cut out those who provide anything other than support and positive energy”.

What fucking baffles me is that my other two roommates were by my side and we all said the same thing so why she’s singling me out is beside me. And how can us saying “we’re worried for the health of ur pet because she’s locking in a room all day and needs to pee” is negative energy. Kill ur fucking dog for all we care then bitch, we brought up our concern now it’s on you.

It’s been a fucking month. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.

And she’s one of those people who has family money then turns around and says she’s poor and her family’s poor and she had to help buy them groceries this summer. Then turn around and buy a $2,000 ring for fun. She has small town money where they have those ugly checkered Louis vutton bags and she wants gucci boots, but then she’s like idk I don’t have money for groceries I can’t contribute.

And I know in the end everything will work out. Because she’ll go right back to living in that small as town and never leave. But dear lord please don’t let her be a vet. Spare those poor animals. It’s not their fault she’s a brainless fuckup.

And like if she was just dumb, fine. She can’t help that. But then she wants to turn it around and act like she’s a fucking genius and everyone is below her.

AND I FOUND OUT SHE VOTED FOR TRUMPPPPP.

Kill me. Just kill me.

I guess I’ll update y’all cuz I’m sure she’ll do more dumb shit soon and I need to rant because it physically PAINS me how angry I get. Like a knot in my chest how she can’t see logic or common sense.

OO and after her mom painted my furniture... because they had damaged it and instead of telling me and offering to help fix it. They took it out of my room and spray painted it (the wrong color and just let it drip if anyone knows how to properly use spray paint). So I told her hey just letting u know that really upset me, I know it was ur mom and not you and you probably didn’t know it happened, but I’m mad and it will take me a few days to get over it. Just so she’s not like Oo why is she mad at me why’s she not talking to me. And she was like I completely understand my mom feels really bad I’m so sorry I didn’t know she did that. Ok we’re all good go about our days.

THEN I find out from my other roommate that she had talked to her and was like Idk why she’s mad, I’m mad that she’s mad. BITCH. What if I took ur furniture out of ur room and decided to spray paint some random lines on it in a different color. I had to sand and repaint it (with fucking paint not spray paint because why the fuck would u do that).

I’m bout to catch a charge lol I get so headed just remembering it.

So yeah if y’all wanna give me some validation that I’m not crazy and this isn’t normal behavior please do, I’m spiraling.

This was a long ass rant but this is my life.

Any witches out there wanna manifest her coming to her senses or moving out and still paying her rent lol that would be great.

Karma honey, nows ur time to shine. Take care of it

[taeminyourmind]

The Good in Good-Bye (A)

SHINee x Original Character (OC)

Genre: Angst, Non-Idol!AU

Synopsis: A love here one day is gone the next. Iris Young's boyfriend, Choi Minho, is missing. Fearing the worst, she travels to Seoul in search of answers as to where he could be. In her search, she befriends a kind local cafe owner, Taemin, a strong-minded hacker, Kibum, and an attentive junior detective, Jinki, who form an unlikely team to track down Minho's whereabouts. But as she inches closer to the truth, Iris must decide if there is such thing as a good in good-bye.

Word Count: 7.3k+

A/N: This story does not reflect any of the members in any way, shape, or form. This story is purely fiction.

The smell of rain engulfs the city as roaring gray clouds hover above the skyscrapers, giving the illusion they’re close enough to touch. The city bustles, ignoring the incoming storm’s anger, as they rush from destination to destination. The growing wind sends drops of rain with each gust causing people to hurry in their strides, afraid to get stuck in nature’s tears.

Among the crowd, a young lady tightly grips a piece of paper in her hands, her face blank and eyes discouraged as people bump past her. She glances at the sky as a drop of rain lands on her face and gives it the smallest smirk. Is this a metaphor come to life? There’s an actual cloud looming over me, she thinks. Leaves are ripped from tree branches and get lost in the wind. The young lady zips her jacket up more and hurries to the safety of a cafe, a place she’s heard about often but never got the chance to visit.

The welcoming bell sounds as she pushes the door open. She wipes her feet on the rug and carefully ascends the stairs. Framed pictures of art and people line the walls while art deco-inspired chandeliers hang from the ceiling. The sound of popular ballads and the smell of freshly brewed drinks grow stronger as she reaches the top of the stairs. The open floor plan brings a welcoming vibe as each piece of furniture shows a different personality, yet finds itself complementing one another.

Ordering a hot chocolate, she sits near a window and rests her head on her palm. The rain is now downpouring making people either run for safety or hurriedly open their umbrellas. Her hand gripping the piece of paper lessens its grip as she watches the rain droplets race to the windowpane. Where are you? she wonders, her eyebrows furrowing as she sinks deep in thought.

“Miss. Iris?”

Iris snaps back to reality and glances up at the voice. The smell of hot chocolate swirls in front of her as a young gentleman holds a mug on a saucer in front of her. He gives her a warm smile before placing the saucer on the table.

“I hope you don’t mind,” he softly begins, “I added chocolate shavings to the whipped cream. It’s a rainy day and it looked like you could use a little sunshine.”

The gentleman’s gentle voice warms Iris’s heart, melting away the building wall of cold that appeared around it. She gives him a smile and slight nod before thanking him.

“Did you need anything else?” He asks.

Iris begins to shake her head before looking up at the young gentleman whose eyes stare at her in curiosity. His eyebrows raise slightly as a way to tell her to say what’s on her mind.

“Actually, I have a question. Have you seen this man?” she asks, stammering over her words as she places the piece of paper on the table. The gentleman takes a seat across from her and studies the paper. Her heart, once pounding with hope drops when the gentleman shakes his head.

“I’m afraid not,” he apologetically says before handing the paper back to Iris. “How long has he been missing?”

“A week, I can’t get to him. He always handled business in Seoul and talked about this cafe’. He never stopped talking about it when he came home.”

“I’m sorry you had to visit under these conditions.”

Iris nods before folding the paper and placing it in her jacket’s pocket. “You’ve been more than kind…” She trails off, waiting for the gentleman to give his name.

“Lee Taemin,” Taemin smiles and reaches out his hand. “I'm the owner - well part owner, I own this cafe with my brother.”

Iris nods and shakes Taemin’s hand. “Iris Young. Or I suppose Young Iris since I’m in Korea.”

Taemin chuckles at her attempted humor which brings a smile to her face. For a moment, they sit in silence while Kim Taewoo’s Love Rain plays from the speakers above. The lyrics “Once someone I loved left me, and I thought it was all because of me” causes Iris to sigh before taking a sip from her mug. The silky chocolate liquid flows down her throat before warming her body, making her forget the coldness of a love believed to be lost.

“Was Minho someone special to you?” Taemin asks after a moment, his eyes peering at her from under his nearly too-long bangs.

Iris hesitates before nodding. “We used to talk about marriage, but then those conversations stopped. It felt like a wedge was coming between us and when he didn’t come home, I thought nothing of it. But one day turned to two, and two turned to three, and before I knew it, a week had passed and I didn’t even get a text. If he picked up the phone and told me “Stop calling me, you crazy bitch,” I would be content because I would know he was alive, heartbroken, but content. He always came to Seoul for business meetings, but never at the same place. So I thought since he always came here that I would get some answers.”

Taemin nods, careful to not interrupt her. His heart fills with sorrow at the tears beginning to well in her eyes. Quickly, she blinks them away and focuses her attention on Taemin. Even with her eyes filled with sorrow, they glisten and innocently shine in the light.

“I wish I could help,” he finally speaks, his fingers playing with a loose string on his apron.

“It was nice being able to speak to someone. Everyone else just ignores me when I show them Minho’s picture.” Pausing for a moment, Iris shifts in her seat and clears her throat. “Could you tell me where the closest police station is?”

“Sure, it’s about two blocks from here. I can walk you there if you don’t mind I mean.” Taemin backtracks with wide eyes. “I mean, it’s getting late and I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you.”

“I would like that,” Iris says with an appreciative smile. “Thank you, Taemin.”

Taemin offers his arm as they descend the stairs. Iris hesitantly holds it with one hand and the rail with the other. Together, they take their time to not slip on the slippery stairs. When they step onto the street, Taemin places a gentle hand over hers as he guides her in the direction of the police station.

“Where are you from?” Taemin asks, his eyes shifting from her back to the sidewalk ahead.

“Is it that easy to tell?”

Taemin shrugs. “You pronounce some words funny, other than that I wouldn’t be able to tell.”

Iris feels her face grow warmer. Her body presses closer to Taemin’s as the crowd multiplies, her hand grips his arm tighter in fear of losing him in the crowd. 

A wave of sadness washes over her as she thinks about the many walks she and Minho would take. She remembers the feeling of the sun shining on her face as she gazed up at him whenever he talked. To her, nothing in the world was more important than Minho and the words he would say. His wise and vivid words would paint her a picture of different perspectives and stories that she never thought about. At night, she would beg him to tell her a story to which he happily obliged. Those days, though not too long ago, seem so far away now.

“I’m from Philadelphia. I studied Korean since I was young and found a love for the language. So, I took a job as a translator.”

“Is that how you met Minho?”

Iris nods with a vague smile. She paints a story of the first time meeting Minho. He was an innocent and wide-eyed junior partner at an architecture firm trying to close an important deal. They met briefly before a meeting where she acted as a translator between him and an American firm. He treated her to sweet rice cakes after the meeting as an appreciation gift. Soon, they would bump into each other more often in the tall office building and began a friendship. Within a few months, they were a couple and madly in love with one another.

“Wow,” Taemin whispers. “Your life is like a drama.”

Iris shakes her head and looks around her. Her eyes immediately fall on the couples she and Taemin pass. She wonders what their lives were like behind closed doors. Did they feel heartbroken like her? Or did they live happily with one another? Her eyes slightly lower as she sinks herself into her thoughts. Taemin looks over at Iris, her serious expression burns an image in his mind - an image he wishes he could erase. For Taemin, he wishes he could erase all pain from the world. They walk another half block in silence until they reach a large white stone building with a police crest placed above the columns.

“We’re here,” Taemin gently says. His voice brings Iris back to reality as she stares at the building.

Iris swiftly slides her hand from Taemin’s possession and digs in her purse, bringing out a pen and piece of paper. “Will you call me if you find out anything? Even the smallest thing would be a lot of help.”

She secretly places a piece of paper in Taemin’s hand with hopeful eyes. Taemin grips the paper tightly in his hand and nods. His honest eyes make Iris smile before slightly nodding and walking through the automatic doors. Before she disappears completely, Iris turns back to Taemin. His thumbs-up gives her confidence as she mirrors his action before disappearing from his sight.

The clicking of the clock mounted on the cement wall mocks Iris with each passing second. Her hands tightly grip her purse in her lap as she stares at the detective perched behind his desk. His eyes study the picture before pinching the bridge of his nose and sliding the paper back to Iris.

“You made a fuss because your boyfriend is missing?” The detective irritatingly asks. He scoffs when Iris nods. “Look, lady, we have more important cases to solve.”

“He’s a human, is he not? What if something happened to him?” Iris trails off before swallowing her words. The thought of Minho hurt, or dead, makes her stomach churn. 

The detective mumbles something to himself before looking up to the ceiling as if he’s pleading with God to have mercy on him. “You said yourself that there’s activity on his bank account, right?”

“Well, yes.”

“Then it’s probably just a case of cold feet. We see this all the time with young lovers.”

“You mean Minho was afraid of getting serious and decided to leave without a word?” The detective nods. Iris scoffs at his response causing him to look at her with raised eyebrows. “Minho is the same one that calls me to ask what kind of bread to buy or to tell me of a new flavor of ice cream at our local parlor and you tell me to not worry about not hearing from him because he ‘got cold feet’?”

The slight raise in Iris’s voice makes the detective stand to his feet. His irritated eyes and red ears make Iris feel like David standing in the shadow of Goliath. She swallows back her words.

“Exactly. Do you know how many reports like yours we get about missing lovers only for them to be found with a mistress? Too many! We have too many more important cases to worry about than a runaway love.”

Iris’s nostrils flare under the detective's annoyance. She rises to her feet, her lowered eyes burning a hole through the detective’s forehead.

“You don’t want to take the case? Fine. But if he shows up dead or injured, it’ll be your fucking head and career.” She hisses through gritted teeth. Her harshness makes the detective lean back a little.

Iris sneers at the detective and takes the paper before walking out the door, slamming it shut. Tears of anger well in her eyes, stinging them as she quickly brushes past people until she steps out onto the top of the stairs. The cool night breeze soothes her face as gazes at the cloudy sky. A lump forms in her throat - she wants to cry, scream, and laugh. So many complicated emotions swirl within her until the sound of her name stills everything.

“Miss. Young?”

Iris turns towards the voice and comes face-to-face with a young gentleman sporting a police jacket and dark-colored slacks. When he straightens his posture, he stands at the same height as Taemin. He takes a moment to catch his breath before giving a bashful smile.

“I’m Detective Lee. I couldn’t help but hear about your report, and I wanted to help.”

Iris’s eyebrows furrow as she leans in closer. His voice, though soft, is deep and soothing. “Won’t you get in trouble?”

Detective Lee ponders her question for a moment before ultimately shaking his head. “Not unless someone gets really injured or dies. If I get a complaint, I’ll get a slap on the wrist.”

“But don’t you have more important cases? Why would you help me?”

Detective Lee glances around before gently pulling Iris to the side. “My sister’s ex-boyfriend also did the same thing yours is doing. I remember the many nights of crying she did and what it did to her. I wish I could’ve done something. So when I heard your story, I thought this was my chance to help.”

Iris nods, understanding Detective Lee’s motive. “I would really appreciate it, Detective Lee.”

“Please, call me Jinki. I don’t like the whole formal thing.”

“Iris,” she responds, nodding slightly at him “Why did you join the police force if you don’t like formality?”

“Helping others beats formality,” Jinki smiles. He looks at the paper in Iris’s hand and takes out his phone. “May I?”

Nodding, Iris hands Jinki the picture and watches him take a picture of the flyer. With a few quick taps, he places the phone back in his pocket and hands the picture back to Iris.

“I think we should get started as soon as possible. How about we meet at 6v6 Cafe at 9 p.m.?”

Iris glances at her watch and gives Jinki an appreciative nod followed by a deep bow. “I’ll be there.”

The night air turns humid as the rain clouds above disperse, revealing the stars. The streets are filled with even more people as the city truly comes to life. What was it about the night that made people come alive? Does the darkness give an illusion that what they do and enjoy will be unknown? Is there less judgment as the night gives everyone permission to indulge in themselves? But even what’s done in the dark must come to the light. You cannot live in darkness for the rest of your life, eventually, you yearn for the sweet kisses of freedom from the sun.

 When Iris thinks back on her relationship with Minho, it was plagued with nothing but sunshine, a happier time. Iris approaches 6v6 and peers inside to see all lights off except for the one coming from upstairs. Her heart drops when she reads the closed sign. That crazy detective, she thinks before dropping to sit on the stoop. Her head hangs low as she tightly shuts her eyes, refusing herself to cry because if she cries, she will have to admit that Minho is truly gone.

The sound of footsteps growing closer to her makes her snap her head up. It takes time for her eyes to clear and adjust to the darkness. A pair of familiar and unfamiliar eyes shine at her.

“Iris! I’m glad you’re here,” Jinki exclaims and holds his hand out to her. He swiftly helps her to her feet and wraps his arm around the young man beside him. “This is Kibum, one of the best hackers I know.”

“What are you talking about?” Kibum scoffs while shrugging his arm from his shoulders. “I’m the best and the only hacker you know.” He turns to Iris and offers a smooth smile. “Nice to meet you, Iris. Let’s catch this lowlife son of a -”

Jinki cuts Kibum off by gently ramming his elbow into his ribs. Kibum’s harsh glance at Jinki softens when he turns his attention back to Iris. He offers an apology while rubbing the area where Jinki’s elbow connected with him. Iris reassures him of no harm. She takes a moment to look Kibum over, his hair is crimped and he’s dressed in a plain white long sleeve shirt, basic dark-washed jeans, with converse. The pair reminds Iris of Minho and his brother. Though Minho bickered with his brother, he would always soften his gaze towards her.

“Shall we go in?” Jinki asks with a bright smile.

“It’s closed,” Iris says, stepping to the side.

Kibum immediately steps up and begins pounding on the door. “Hey! Open up! It’s the police!”

Iris nervously glances at Jinki who gives her a reassuring smile. Kibum’s banging grows louder until a figure descends the stairs. Iris hides behind Kibum. She peeks over his shoulder and recognizes Taemin.

“We’re closed,” Taemin says pointing to the sign.

“I’m not blind,” Kibum scoffs and grabs Jinki’s arm to bring him beside him. “Show him your badge.”

Jinki proudly displays his badge that shimmers in the outside light. “May we come in?”

Taemin’s curious eyes study the two men before landing on Iris. He moves his body slightly to get a better look, wondering if it’s really her. But his curious eyes turn frustrated when Kibum stands in his view and impatiently taps on the glass.

“Hey, stop staring and let us in.”

The sound of the lock unlocking causes Kibum to pull the door open and offer a quick ‘thank you’ before storming up the stairs with Jinki on his heels. Iris steps across the threshold and gives Taemin an apologetic smile. He closes the door behind her and locks it.

“I didn’t know they would be so adamant on meeting here,” she says in a low voice. Her eyes fall to the ground.

Taemin pushes his hands in his front pockets and shrugs his shoulders. “If I can help in any way, I’m happy to do so.” He leans in with a playful smirk pulling on the corners of his mouth. “Even if that means turning this place into a stakeout after hours.”

Taemin’s playful tone makes Iris meet his eyes with a small smile. She giggles low enough for only she and Taemin to hear. Her smile makes him chuckle before nodding towards the stairs.

“Let’s go before they think we abandoned them.”

Taemin places a tray of coffee, creamer, and sugar at the end of the table before taking his place besides Kibum, who whines for him to pass him a mug like an older brother. Taemin sighs heavily before passing him the mug. Before Iris can blink, Kibum and Taemin begin bickering like brothers. She can’t help but smile at the memory of Minho bickering with his brother out of love. When Minho’s face flashes before her eyes, the corners of her mouth begin to fall, though she tries her best to keep them up.

“Kibum is an only child,” Jinki whispers, leaning close until his shoulder brushes against hers. “So, he has a way of treating those he meets like his brothers and sisters.”

Iris nods at Jinki’s comment. As an only child herself, she wishes she had a brother or sister, someone she can run to and fall back on. To her, the relationship of siblings goes beyond blood, so even if she doesn’t have one by the grace of biology, she can have one through a deeper connection.

“Alright you two, let’s get to business.”

The boys settle down at the sound of Jinki’s authoritative voice. Even Iris fixes her posture. Pleased with himself, Jinki turns to Iris with soft eyes.

“Iris, tell us what happened from the beginning to now.”

Iris holds her hands together under the table and shifts in her seat. The thought of Minho’s disappearance makes her expression fall. Her eyes tightly close as she recounts the past two weeks. All of the boys listen attentively, nodding along with her story. When she gets to the end, she can’t bring herself to open her eyes to see their empathetic gazes. Behind her lids, a flood of tears breaks free as she brings her hands to cover her face. Her sobs seem to still the room as everything goes silent. For a moment, she feels alone until she feels warmth surrounding her. Arms wrap themselves around her from the sides and behind.

“It’s okay,” Jinki soothingly whispers, his hands rubbing her arm in a nurturing manner.

Iris takes a deep breath and looks at all the boys. Taemin gently strokes her hair and gives her a reassuring smile while Kibum promises to kick Minho in the balls when they find him. Kibum’s comment makes Iris burst into laughter and gently nudge him away. Kibum softly pokes her cheek before he and Taemin go back to their seats.

“Alright, this is what I’m thinking,” Jinki begins. He stands to his feet and places a hand on his hip while the other relaxes on his chin. His eyes narrow as he sinks deep in thought. “We need to begin somewhere. Iris, you give Kibum all of the information you have on Minho, even the sensitive stuff like phone number, bank information, social media, and so on. Taemin, you keep a lookout for Minho, keep a picture behind the counter so your workers can be on the lookout too. I will look into the system and see if I can get any additional information on him. And Iris," his softened expression lands on Iris's face, "if he contacts you or if you remember anything, even the smallest thing, give either Kibum or me a call.”

Everyone nods and Jinki’s plan. Taemin gives Iris a pen and a piece of paper and watches her scribble down all of the information she can think of. He notices her hesitancy and hand trembling before she gives the paper to Kibum. Iris watches Kibum’s eyes move across the paper before looking at Taemin and Jinki with worried eyes.

“What kind of guy doesn’t have personal social media?” Kibum asks under his breath. He slightly sucks his teeth before locking eyes with Iris. “We’ll get him. I promise.”

Kibum’s stern promise makes Iris exhale in relief. The determination in his eyes and strength in his voice brings hope to a place that seemed hopeless. Jinki and Taemin also promise to catch Minho, their voices filled with the same determination as Kibum’s. The overwhelming support brings a smile to Iris’s face. Standing to her feet, she welcomes the boys into her open arms, wrapping them around their broad shoulders the best she can.

“Thanks, you guys,” she whispers. “I mean it.”

Sunlight blankets the city in warmth, its rays bouncing off the windows of the towering buildings. Joyous chatter and laughter fill the streets as people flock to outdoor venues and linger outside a little longer before reaching their destination. The early spring weather makes Iris forget her problems for a moment. She tilts her face slightly towards the sun and walks a little slower, enjoying the beauty of nature that surrounds her.

When she left the hotel this morning, there was no destination in her mind. She would walk until she couldn’t any longer she told herself. The fresh air and bright sunlight drive her drowsiness and clouded mind away. But no matter how far she walks, the image of Minho possibly hurt or dead swirls in her mind. She heaves a sigh at the images haunting her mind and quickens her pace. Within a few minutes, her feet lead her to a familiar street. Her eyes widen at the ‘6v6’ sign hanging from the side of a building. She hesitates for a moment, rocking back and forth on her feet, fighting with herself whether or not she should go in.

The familiar scents of the cafe welcome Iris as she ascends the stairs. Her fingers slide on the rail beside her, tapping it every now and then out of nervousness. The sunlight brightens the room giving it an ethereal feel. She stands in the doorway, looking around for a familiar face. She feels herself about to turn around to leave when she meets the friendly gaze of Taemin. He offers a small smile before placing two mugs at a table he was serving. He straightens his back and motions for Iris to come to the counter.

“You’re back,” Taemin beams when Iris approaches the counter. “I’m glad you’re here. I want you to meet someone.”

Taemin calls for a server to take his place before inviting Iris behind the counter. Feeling her hesitancy, he gently holds her wrist and guides her through the double doors that lead to a small hallway. He knocks on a door opposite the employee bathroom and enters. A young man sitting on a cushioned stool playing a game on his phone perks his head up at the sound of the door opening. His eyes land on Iris before looking to Taemin.

“Iris, this is my brother, Taesun,” Taemin says. “I figured maybe he could be of some help since he’s here on the days I’m not.” He redirects his attention towards his brother. “This is Iris.”

Taesun sets his phone down and rushes to the two and shakes Iris’s hand. “Taemin explained the situation to me. I can try to help. Do you have a picture?”

“You didn’t get my text?” Taemin quickly asks before Iris can open her mouth. “I told you I printed out his picture and they’re on the desk in the drawer.”

Taesun’s eyebrow raises as he rushes to the desk. He pulls open a couple drawers before holding up a sheet of paper. He gives his brother an apologetic smile. Shaking his head, Taemin mumbles inaudibly under his breath.

“Choi Minho,” Taesun reads to himself before looking towards a nervous Iris. “The name is familiar, but I can’t make out the face. Normally, the Minho that comes in wears a mask and cap. It’s even hard to see his eyes.”

Iris’s face drops a little before thanking Taesun for his help.

“We’ll keep the picture behind the counter,” Taemin says, his voice gentle and low.

An appreciative smile spreads on Iris’s face as she thanks the brothers for their help. Stepping onto the street, a helpless sigh pushes past her lips as she leans against the side of the building. Her fingers twitch before reaching for her phone. The sight of Minho’s contact makes her heart pound as her thumb hovers over the call button. What if he doesn’t pick up? What if he does pick up? What if someone else picks up? she repeatedly thinks to herself. She squeezes her eyes shut and presses the button. Her hand tightly grips the phone against her ear. Expecting to hear a series of rings, she bites the inside of her lip when she’s met with a robotic message saying the person she is trying to reach is not accepting any calls at the moment. Her heart drops as she slides down the wall, shock paralyzes her body as she zones out. Some people give her a strange look while whispering to their friends. The figure of someone standing in front of her makes her gaze towards the figure’s face. She blinks to adjust her sight against the beaming sun and recognizes the figure as Taesun. Tears well in her eyes as her bottom lip begins to quiver.

“He blocked me,” her voice trembles while Taesun helps her to her feet. “How did you find me.”

Taesun points to the cameras on the side of the building. “I saw you sit next to the stoop and wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Iris pauses for a moment before nodding. “I’ll be okay. I’m just going to lie down. Thank you for your concern.”

Iris turns and begins walking away before Taesun has a chance to say anything. He watches her disappear into the crowd. Silently, he prays she finds answers to her question or else they will destroy her, eating her from the inside until she’s empty.

The darkness of the hotel room brings a sort of peace to Iris as she lies in bed, the covers lying over her head as she holds a pillow close to her chest. She tosses and turns when her mind deceives her, making her think the pillow is Minho by playing once fond memories like a movie. She sits up and tosses the pillow to the ground and hugs her knees. Each breath burns as she fails to control her sobs. Her fingertips press firmly into her skin while she shakes her head, trying her best to rid her mind of Minho. Is this worth the pain? she wonders.

The sound of familiar pounding makes Iris jump. For a moment, she stays still, afraid to move until she hears the whine of Kibum begging her to let him in. Walking to the door, she quickly wipes her tears away on her sleeves. Her hand rests on the doorknob as she takes a deep breath before opening the door to see Jinki, Kibum, and Taemin. Taemin’s bright eyes turn sad when he sees you.

“What are you guys doing here?” She asks in shock. “And how did you know I was here?”

“You weren’t answering our calls, so we got worried,” Kibum says.

“And I may have looked into your bank activity to see which hotel you were staying at and used my power to find out your room number,” Jinki adds.

Taemin throws his hands up in defense. “They dragged me here.”

Iris opens the door more to allow them inside. Kibum goes in first and quickly sets his computer up while Jinki and Taemin file in behind him and take a seat on the couch and chairs. Iris sighs before taking a seat next to Kibum.

“He blocked me,” she says suddenly, her eyes fixated on the floor. “Is it really worth all this trouble? He’s made it clear that he doesn’t want me anymore.”

The room falls silent with exception of the light hum from Kibum’s laptop and the air conditioner. Afraid to look up, Iris rises from the couch and goes to open the curtain to reveal the city skyline. The night allows the lights to shine brighter than the stars.

“Iris,” Taemin softly begins. “I think it’s worth a shot to actually talk to him. If nothing else, it’ll give you closure so you won’t have to ask any more questions or think about the what-ifs.”

“He’s right,” Kibum adds. “He’s an asshole that left you and you deserve to have your answers.”

Jinki nods in agreement. Iris chews on the inside of her cheek, her mind pulling in numerous directions. Scenarios race through her mind making her close her eyes tight. Is it worth it? she asks herself. It is.

She turns to face the boys with a rejuvenated determination in her eyes. “What do you guys have?”

Taken aback by her sudden determination, Kibum begins typing on his computer until Taemin hands him a USB.

“My brother got footage from our surveillance cameras and thought this could be of some help.”

“What’s on it?” Kibums asks.

“A customer named Minho getting into his car. He says he wasn’t able to see his face but managed to view the cameras and spot him going to his car. There’s a license plate visible, so maybe that could help.”

Kibum thinks for a moment before his eyes open in realization. He quickly gets to work, his eyebrows furrowing while his eyes dart back and forth against the screen. The others lean in towards him in curiosity when he curses under his breath and leans back a little.

“Jinki,” Kibum says while writing a set of numbers on a piece of paper before handing it to him. “Check to see who these identity numbers belong to.”

Jinki asks no questions and takes the paper and his phone to the bathroom. Iris goes to sit beside Kibum with Taemin bringing his chair closer.

“What’s going on?” Iris asks.

Kibum shakes his head. “I don’t want to say anything until I’m certain. When Jinki comes back, that’ll decide if I tell you.”

Iris and Taemin exchange weary looks. She rises to her feet and takes her place by the window again. She nervously chews on the tip of her thumb as she hides within her thoughts. Death no longer terrifies her, but the thought of Minho alive and possibly well strikes fear in her heart. Which was worse - Minho being dead or him being alive and well after he disappeared?

It feels like an eternity before Jinki exits the bathroom. His lowered eyes make Kibum sit up straight. He takes his original seat and calls Iris back to the couch. He exchanges no words except for a slight nod towards Kibum, who opens his laptop.

“Well,” Kibum clears his throat before taking a moment to find the right words to say. “Let’s start from the beginning. Jinki and I have been working together to compare our findings. I was able to pinpoint his location in Seoul based on his recent bank activities, which have huge amounts taken out every few days. I looked into his records and found he’s in a luxury apartment complex not far from 6v6 Cafe - it looks like he’s had it for the past year. Jinki managed to get his address and we can confirm our findings are the same. I noticed he’s been leasing a car, so when Taemin gave me the footage from the cafe’s surveillance, it matched the description. But, that’s not it,” Kibum trails off, his eyes uneasy. Iris, Jinki, and Taemin lean forward. The trio press Kibum for answers to his findings. “There’s another woman. I managed to look into her social media, email, and other accounts and -”

“Spit it out, Kibum,” Iris breathlessly says.

“According to her and her private messages, she’s pregnant.”

The world stops rotating and begins to close in on Iris. Her heart beats faster while it feels as if life has its foot on her neck, restricting her airflow. Her nails press into her palms as she tightly balls her fists. She hears the boys talking, but it sounds like white noise. A baby, she thinks.

“A baby?” She repeats aloud. She opens her mouth to speak again, but nothing comes out.

“We have the address,” Jinki slowly says. “You can do what you want with it. Just think it through before you decide anything.”

He slides the piece of paper across the coffee table and gives Kibum and Taemin a sorrowful glance. Iris takes the address and looks it over. She closes her eyes tightly only to be met with images of Minho lying with this unknown woman. The way he cared for her, praising her body with sweet words and gentle touches, these things that were supposed to be reserved for her were being used on another woman. How long has this been going on? Iris thinks.

“When did they first begin talking?” She indirectly asks Kibum.

“Iris, I don’t think -”

“When did they first begin talking?!”

The sound of her raised voice brings a heavy sigh from Kibum’s core. “For the past year and a half.”

Iris sadly chuckles to herself while shaking her head. Is this why you stopped talking about marriage? she wonders. Her thumb rubs over the address’s indent from Jinki’s writing.

“Will you guys come with me tomorrow?”

“Are you sure?” Taemin softly asks. His gentle eyes watch Iris’s face soften and her eyes well with tears.

Iris nods. “If I’m going to go on with my life as he has, I need closure.”

Iris’s fingers nervously tap the top of her legs. The sound of moving traffic fills the car’s silence. Being so close to the building that fueled her lover’s betrayal makes the pit of her stomach drop. She looks at the towering building before looking at the clock on the dashboard - 10 minutes have already gone by. The longer she waits, the more nerves come to paralyze her. She looks at the three boys in the car - Jinki in the driver’s seat, Kibum busy with his laptop in the passenger seat, and Taemin humming to himself beside her.

Iris begins to think about Minho and the love they once shared; the promises that they made; and the betrayal that’s fallen upon them. Then she thinks about her life, what will she make of it when everything is over? Will she dwell on what could have been with Minho or will she begin to heal and enjoy the life that is ahead of her. She takes a breath and places her hand on the door handle. With a swift movement, she exits the car and quickly walks towards the building. Remembering the code Kibum gave her on the ride over, she enters the pin into the keypad and enters the building.

The modern and futuristic furnishings decorate the lobby and hallway. For a brief moment, she stares in awe at its beauty before heading towards the elevators. As the elevator ascends, she looks out the glass windows that show the busy city. Her heart aches at the realization of Minho's promise of a home with a view of Seoul. ‘One day, we’ll own a place in the sky.’ Yeah right, she thinks.

The doors to the elevator open. A tall figure stands at the entrance busy on their phone. When they step into the elevator, their eyes widen in surprise.

“Iris?”

Iris looks up from the piece of paper Jinki gave her and stops in her tracks. Her eyes widen at the view of Minho, dressed in a tailored suit with hair parted on the side with half gelled back. They don’t exchange words for a moment, both searching for words to say to one another. The look of surprise in Minho’s eyes turns to anger as he steps into the elevator and presses the ‘lobby’ button. He doesn’t bother to say a word to Iris the way down, and she can’t find the words to say. When the doors open, his hand wraps around her wrist as he pulls her towards an empty conference room. The touch that was once warm now stung her skin with its coldness. He locks the door behind them and begins to pace the room.

“What are you doing here?” He lowly asks, his eyes facing a wall. When Iris doesn’t answer he turns to her and asks the question again in a stern tone.

“You left,” she finally says. “I thought something happened to you. I’ve been worried sick and you’re upset at me? Why, Minho? Just why?”

“Because there are things you will never understand.”

“When did you stop loving me? Was it when you met that girl?”

Minho stays silent.

“Who is she anyway?” The silence from Minho makes Iris frustrated as she raises her voice to ask her question again.

“Her name is Heejin. We met at a company party in Seoul. She supported my ideas and dreams -”

“And I didn’t?” Iris interjects with hurt lacing her voice. “Minho, I’ve been by your side.”

“You had your own dreams and when I needed you, you weren’t there.”

Iris balls her fists and feels her nails press deeply in her palms. “I wasn’t there? I helped you prepare your pitches, I helped you in meetings as your translator, I did things I regret to get information for you so you could get ahead and I wasn’t there for you?! A relationship isn’t a one-way street, Minho. You need help from both sides and though I lacked in some places, I wasn’t completely absent from your dreams.”

Minho opens his mouth to say something but closes it back. He looks away from Iris and falls into a chair and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Did you plan all of this?” Iris quietly asks. “Did you plan on moving in together and having a child and leaving me behind?”

The harshness of her words causes Minho to flinch. The severity of his actions being spewed towards him makes him heavily sigh. He remains quiet, having no excuse for his actions. He’s been conscious of his affair and continued to toy Iris along, even if it meant her getting hurt. But there was something about Heejin that pulled him in and trapped him. Each hour with Heejin erased Iris from his mind, and he never remembered her until he came home or her name popped up on his phone. It’s true, he was done with her, but the sight of her face makes memories of happier times rush back to his mind.

“Nothing was planned. It wasn’t supposed to end like this.”

“So, you did want it to end,” Iris says. She looks at Minho who averts his eyes to the floor, afraid to face the person he hurt most. “I just came here to get an answer, and now your silence is deafening. Good-bye, Minho.”

Iris turns towards the door and places her hand on the handle. The urge to turn back and lay her eyes one more time on Minho exits her mind as she yanks the door open and walks out the room. The heaviness and anxiousness that’s been sitting on her chest lifts when she walks out of the building and to the car. All of the boys give her a curious look while she settles in her seat. She exhales deeply and gives them a smile to which they return.

“Where to?” Jinki asks, his eyes looking at her through the rearview mirror. 

Iris looks at the setting sun and softly smiles. “Han River.”

The gentle breeze carries the delicious aroma of street food throughout the area. Jinki, Kibum, Iris, and Taemin lean against the rails of the river, watching the sun paint the water in hues of orange and gold.

“You know,” Kibum says while tilting his face towards the setting sun. “Maybe we should open our own P.I. firm. Jinki can be the orchestrator, I can be the brains, Taemin can be the lookout, and Iris can be the muscle.”

“How do you know if I can fight?” Iris asks.

Kibum shrugs. “You don’t have to physically hurt them. You can use your words.”

Everyone laughs at Kibum’s suggestion while he continues to pitch his idea.

“Are you going home?” Taemin asks, turning towards Iris. The warm hues of the sun paint his face gold.

“Only until I find somewhere else to go. There’re too many memories back home.”

“Hello!” Kibum says with his arms raised. “Come to Seoul! You can’t move far away from us after all we’ve been through.”

Iris laughs at Kibum’s dramatic gesture and promises to give it some thought. The look of satisfaction on his face causes her to smile before trying to wrap her arms around all three of the boys.

“Let’s promise to meet at the cafe every month,” Jinki smiles. “As Kibum said, we didn’t go through all of this for nothing.” 

Holding out his pinky, everyone wraps theirs around his. The sound of the boys’ laughter brings a wide smile to Iris’s face. When she came to Seoul, terrified of what could have happened to Minho, she didn’t expect to not only get her heartbroken but begin three new friendships. What the future holds for her, she doesn’t know, but with friends like Jinki, Kibum, and Taemin by her side, she can find herself looking for happiness in them when darkness nears.

[the-cult-of-russo]

Push and Pull (Part 5)

Pairing: Matt Murdock x OC

Warnings: cursing, gunshot wound and stitches

--------

A lot of people might think Daphne was cold or heartless. Sure, she had a bad attitude and it was hard for her to form meaningful relationships, but it didn't mean she was a complete bitch. Which is why she felt bad as she looked at the photos of Mr Lee's son, Keiran, and young wife making out. She'd be seeing him later in the week and have to break the news to him. She was planning on breaking into the Keiran's apartment and snooping once he was at work in the day. She still had that gnawing feeling something was off with the adulterous couple. 

She'd never had a real relationship herself. She never let herself get too attached. She wasn't sure why, she'd just always been that way. Even as a kid with her older brother and sister, she was the snarky sarcastic one. Her love to push people's buttons left her with little to no real friends and guys didn't like a girl that talked back. She didn't mind. It meant she didn't get hurt. She'd just have sex when the opportunity arose and then wash her hands of it. But she'd be a liar if she didn't sometimes wonder what it would be like. To have that someone who cared. Who treasured her and made her feel special. But then she'd think about how most of her PI work was looking into cheating spouses and how most of the time they had been right. Was true love even real? 

She sighed, kicking her boots up onto her table. It was scuffed enough so she didn't care too much. Her boots were paired with a long black summer dress with a slit to her thigh and some thick tights, a black wool cardigan on top. Goth chic her sister Lisa would call it. It made her snort. Her hair was slightly wavy from the shower she’d taken earlier and it had dried naturally. Standing up, she grabbed her backpack and camera  and decided to head out to Keiran's apartment. Only this time she was really hoping not to find something. 

On her way there, she thought about the guns. It had been a couple of days since the disastrous outing with the Devil himself and the morning after she’d given her evidence to Brett. He was worried, so was she. But it was out of her hands now. And thankfully she hadn't been contacted by Mr Moody to accompany him again. Pulling her phone from her cardigan pocket, she was satisfied Keiran would be out of the house and at work. As she stepped up to the shitty broken intercom at the front, she heaved a sigh. She hoped someone would let her in. Glancing at the names, she just settled on any of them. There was a dull beep as she pressed the button for 'Mr Meyers'.

"Hello?" The sound of an old man sounded. 

"Hi there, would you be able to buzz me in please?" She asked politely. She bit her lip  holding her breath as she prepared to think of an excuse for him.

"Annie, is that you?" He asked, sounding confused.

"Mhm," she lied, rolling her eyes and getting impatient. 

"You forgot your key again, dear? I keep telling you to make another," he chuckled through the intercom.

"I know. I'm just forgetful I guess," she snorted. The shrill buzz almost startled her, that had been so easy. Thank God for Mr Meyers. She slipped inside and jogged up the stairs to the third floor. Her steps were light as she tried to listen for any noises. She didn't need anyone suddenly appearing and wondering why a weird girl was on their floor. She idly wished she had Matt's super hearing. It sounded quiet though and she got to the door she was after. 

A few quick moments with her lock pick set and it was open. Her search was quick and efficient. Always making sure to put things exactly where they should be. She felt like she'd searched everywhere and hadn't found anything. She knew she should have felt relieved but she couldn't shake that nagging feeling in the back of her head. She stood for a moment, closing her eyes as she tried to think where something would be. When she opened her eyes again, they glanced around until they settled on a piece of modern art of the wall. She wasn't a fan of the modern stuff. It looked like a toddler just threw paint on a canvas. Her art preference was the more detailed skilled work. She padded over, lifting it from the wall. Sure enough, behind the canvas was a safe. 

"Bingo," she muttered.

It took longer than she liked to crack it, but she did in the end. She wasn't happy with what she found. Along with a handgun that had the serial number scratched out, she found copies of Mr Lee's life insurance. It was for $2 million and it would be split between Keiran and Mr Lee's wife. She started to see just why this guy was getting in her pants. Were they planning something together? Or did she have no idea she was being pulled into this? She snapped some pictures quickly before putting everything back where it should be. Before long she was on her way home again with a bad feeling. It wasn't concrete evidence of any plans but she'd learnt a long while ago to trust her gut. Maybe she should move her meeting with Mr Lee up and speak to him.

Her train of thought was interrupted when her phone started ringing. It was Brett.

"Hey, got news?" She asked, walking down the street and weaving through the people. 

"Bad news. Last night a whole bunch of people were gunned down. Some biker club. Ammo matches some of the heavy guns you got on film," he stated grimly. She stopped walking and the person behind her who almost collided with her scoffed as they moved past.

"Well that's not good. I guess they weren't for selling then? Why would the Italians have beef with those guys?" She asked warily. As bad as it would be, she'd been hoping that the guns were just being sold. But this was war and she had a feeling the bikers wouldn't be the only ones facing the wrath. 

"Not sure yet. We're trying to piece it together. Whatever it is, it seems like the Italians are trying to take over some turfs. I'll keep you updated," he sighed. After they bid their goodbyes, she trudged up her stairs trying to figure it out. 

Sitting on her sofa, she wondered just how bad this war the Italians were waging would be. She'd never set out to investigate organised crime. She stuck with her small time thing for years and she was fine with it. But a few years ago Brett reached out when he was hitting dead ends. He'd heard about her skills and he shouldn't have asked her for help but he did. Now she did bits and bobs for him every now and again, especially with her interest in the Italian case. He was a detective now and even though it was still off the books, everyone knew she helped them out. She only dealt with him though. She didn't trust most of the other cops after the whole thing with Fisk. She'd kept out of that shit show as much as she could after one of the crazy Russians caught her and she got a lovely stab wound in the thigh. Then there was the whole mess with The Punisher. All of it had changed the gangs of Hell's Kitchen. Some of them wiped out, others coming back and others even stronger than ever. She hated that sometimes she wondered if she'd grew a pair and didn't shy away from it after being stabbed, if she'd have saved some of the lives lost in the chaos left behind from Fisk and Castle. Maybe that's why she couldn't say no when Brett had asked her to start looking into the Italians. 

Either way, here she was. In the middle of a war that was just beginning. And her curiosity wouldn't let her back out now. She wanted to know what was going on just as much as the cops. There wasn't much she could do now anyway. She'd let Brett call her when he had some news and a lead to go on before she threw herself in the line of fire again. 

She found herself preoccupied the rest of the day with thoughts on the Italians. She switched between trying to distract herself watching Netflix on her laptop and then looking at articles about the biker massacre. Her phone had been resting on the coffee table. She doubted Brett would be calling her today with news but she waited anyway. She wasn't sure just when she got so invested in trying to help with this. She just wanted something, a lead from the evidence at the crime scene or to do with HCL with the money laundering. Anything that would give her a direction to go to dig deeper. 

Trying to block the Italians from taking over her restless mind, she snuggled on her couch with a thick blanket in her pyjamas as she watched Breaking Bad on Netflix. She loved the show and she’d watched it multiple times. She kept dozing in and out of sleep as night drew on. She wasn't sure what time it was when she heard a banging in the open plan apartment. She shot up, glaring at the door as her heart hammered in her chest. A quick glance to the large clock on the wall told her it was 3am now. The banging came again but she realised it wasn't from the door. Looking to the large window, she was startled by Matt in his suit, leaning against it from the outside. Her annoyance glared at him for dropping in at this time. Dropping in at all, honestly. She told him to stay the fuck away and here he was at 3am and waking her up. She found it hard enough to get a decent sleep on the best of days. 

Throwing the blanket off her, she stood up and stomped over to the window. She wasn't even paying attention to him really.

"What part of stay the fuck away don’t you get?" She snapped impatiently. He didn't say anything through the glass but then she noticed how his hand was clamped over his chest, how his chest was heaving. Something was wrong. She opened the window to see him better and the moonlight glinted off his suit that seemed wet. Oh. Blood.

"Jesus, you're bleeding?" She asked, her voice getting a little higher. It was a lot of blood. 

"Are you going to let me in or not?" He bit out, wincing as he did. She had half a mind to close her window and let him bleed out on her fire escape. But as annoying as he was, she knew she couldn't. She stepped aside and he carefully climbed inside. She took note of how slow he was moving and she wondered how much blood he'd already lost. He stumbled once inside and she quickly wrapped an arm around his uninjured side, making him groan in pain. With a tut, she led him to her couch and helped him sit down.

"Why are you here? I mean I get that you can't exactly go to the hospital, but here?" She asked, feeling irritated. She hadn't expected to have a half dead vigilante bleeding out on her sofa.

"I didn't have anywhere else to go," he muttered, shifting as he tried to take off his suit. She wanted to ask about Foggy but she guessed the happy go lucky best friend wasn't his go to for stitching him up. With a heaving sigh, she knelt on the couch next to him, helping him remove the top half of his suit. There was a gunshot wound under the front of his left shoulder. She tried not to be concerned. 

"It's still in there, can you get it out?" He asked weakly. She tried to temper the anxiety at how bad he sounded. Not like she cared or anything, she'd worry no matter who it was.

"I can try," she muttered. She jumped up and ran to the bathroom, grabbing the tweezers off the side, the first aid kit and then the bottle of whisky that was on the side in the kitchen. 

When knelt next to him again, his mask was off and it was jarring to actually see his face when still in his devil suit, even if it was only partially. 

"Don't think this is a routine. You get hurt again, you can go somewhere else," she snarked. Honestly at this point it was more to cover her nerves at trying to keep him alive. He chuckled a little, leaning his head on the back of the sofa as she doused the tweezers with alcohol. One hand carefully steadied herself on his chest and she glanced at his pale face. His unseeing eyes were on her ceiling and his hair was all over the place.

"This is gonna hurt like a bitch," she murmured. Honestly, she felt a little bad for him. He just nodded, closing his eyes in anticipation.

She took a deep breath before digging the tweezers in his wound. He cried out. One hand gripping the couch tightly as the other flailed for a minute before he settled on fisting her shirt. She bit back a retort since he was in pain and she focused on fishing out the bullet. Thankfully it wasn't too long before she yanked it out. He was breathing deeply, sweating and looking awful and now the wound was oozing blood at a worrying rate. She grabbed some gauze and pressed it to the wound with a worried frown.

"I need to stitch it, hold this," she said firmly. Still fisting her shirt, his other hand came up to put pressure on the wound. She dug around and got the needle, cleaning it with the whisky before threading it. She tried to ignore the tremor in her hand as it brushed against his, moving the gauze.

When her eyes flit to his face, he was already looking at her with his unfocused gaze.

"You look like shit, Murdock," she muttered with a wry smirk as she started to stitch him up. He chuckled a little, scrunching his eyes closed as she tried to make quick work of sewing him up.

"I feel like it," he replied with a sly grin. She shook her head as her hands delicately thread the needle through his skin, stopping occasionally to soak up the blood with the gauze.

"You're good at this. Not your first time?" He asked. She wondered if he was making small talk to try and take his mind off it. Since he was injured she decided to go along with it. Her anger at dropping in like this would wait until she was done.

"Not a gunshot, but I had to sew myself up after a gnarly stab wound," she murmured in reply. 

Her hands faltered as his hand let go of her shirt and settled on her bare thigh, his fingers running over the jagged scar. It startled her how he'd even know where it was but she shook it off. He was weird after all with his super senses. She tried to ignore the fact his hand was on her thigh at all. She tried to reason that his hands were kind of his eyes since he was blind. But the touch was light, gentle almost, it made her feel weird and she didn't like it. She didn't think anyone had touched her with such gentleness before.

"Who stabbed you?" He asked with a frown.

"Got caught snooping by one of the Russians a few years back. Taught me a hard lesson in being more sneaky," she snorted mirthlessly. His frown deepened and his hand stilled on her thigh. A few stitches later and he was all done. She wiped his wound clean before bandaging him up. 

His gentle touch to her scar had rattled her and she hopped off the sofa the second she was done. She started stuffing everything back into the first aid kit.

"I wasn't joking when I said this won't happen again. Teach Foggy first aid or something, but don't drop by here like this again," she said shortly, maybe harsher than intended and his frown let her know he was confused by it. He didn't reply, just nodding curtly at her. After putting the bloodied gauze away she noticed him standing from the couch, he was swaying on his feet though and she bit her lip as she walked over.

"What are you doing?" She sighed, annoyed.

"Getting out of your hair. That's what you wanted right?" He bit out. Yes, it was. But as he took a woozy step forward he almost collapsed again. She felt a pang of guilt and pursed her lips as she walked over, pushing him gently to sit back down.

"You lost a lot of blood, you need to rest. Just stop being annoying. You can take the couch and leave tomorrow," she relented. He didn't look any happier than she was about the whole thing but there wasn't much they could do. They both knew he was in no condition to get home just yet. He gave a curt nod, staying where she pushed him back down. This would be awkward as all hell. Her apartment was all open plan except the bathroom and a small closet. Her bed was on the other side and she felt uneasy with him being so close if she was to sleep. But she also didn't want to stay awake and be forced to spend time with him with this tension. 

"Go to sleep," she huffed, padding over to her bed. She had some blood on her shirt and a bloody handprint on it from where he'd gripped it. But she paid no mind to it as she climbed in bed, burrowing under the blankets. She fell asleep that night to uncomfortable silence.

[hopeswriting]

Modern AU (Adult!)Arcobaleno on socials media though. While Flames and mafia are definitely still a thing.

Now I’m by no means well acquainted to all the different popular socials media, but here’s my humble take:

Reborn on Instagram.

He only has pictures of Leon first and foremost, with him in the background in one of his ridiculous but very well-made cosplay. Leon of course also wears the same cosplay as him.

He never shows his full face in any of the pictures, but just enough his followers know he’s handsome as fuck.

The artists/photoshoppers among them regularly put the pieces together to see how he could look like, but in a funny-and-obviously-purposefully-wrong way only.

Reborn loves them and saves them all.

------

Once in a blue moon he does post a picture of himself where you can see him clearly all dressed up and fancy, and then immediately deletes it.

But only after he’s sure it has been seen, so he can watch his followers lose their shit while drinking a nice espresso.

They try hard, but so far none of them managed to save any of the pictures before he deletes them.

------

Often there’s what suspiciously looks like blood stains on their clothes and straight up dead bodies lying in the background, but Reborn went so passive-aggressive with the few who dared to ask, everyone is too afraid to ask now.

Anyone who badmouths Leon in any way is instantly blocked. But only after Reborn ripped them a new one AND let his followers do it too.

*

Skull on Twitter and Snapchat.

He tweets the most random, out of nowhere, highly worrying things, that always sent his followers in a frenzy trying to figure out why the fuck he would think of any of this in the first place??

“aren’t you ever tried of your solid, rigid, restrictive bones? don’t you want to just be Luffy from One Piece, a rubber being that can shape themself in whatever way they wish?”

or:

“nobody ever tells you this, but the stress of picking apart melted leather from your burnt skin before it heals is VERY worth the adrenaline of making fire your BITCH”

or:

“is it REALLY illegal if you break in and eat the food but leave money behind??”

------

That’s just his Twitter only followers though.

The ones on Snapchat have the privilege to watch him stumble head first step by step to his tweets, and are actually very involved and active spectators that keep him out of jail, or killing himself, or killing someone else.

Skull, recording a video, halfway stuck in between two buildings: What’s up guys, there're these guys following me and trying to kill me, quick tell me what bones to break so I can fit in there.

see also:

Skull, riding his bike, both of them suspiciously wet, holding a lighter in his hand: You guys ready for this sick fire stunt I came up with?? If everything goes well I should only get second to third degree burns, let’s do this!!!

see also:

A picture of Skull lying on a roof, his arms full of snacks and his mouth stuffed with food, with police cars in the background, that says: send tips to make sure there’s always food in your fridge for when you need it the most. #midnightsnack #snitchesgetstitches #justsaying

see also:

A picture of Skull crouched in front of a body, posing, that says: don’t worry guys we’re just faking, but hypothetically, if you were to hide a body as quick as possible from here without being seen, what would you do? #hypotheticallyseriousanswersonly #hypotheticallythecopsaremaybeontheirway #quickanswersappreciated

*

Verde on Facebook.

He creates a public group with only him as member that’s basically his scientific diary.

It’s not really to invite intellectual challenging debates (though he’d be all for it if someone smart enough showed up), but he figures it’s in his best interest to make the world a less dumb place if he can.

It finds his public, though there’s only a few comments because god forbid you say something dumb or inaccurate and Verde fucking annihilates you in the comment section.

But like, in a teacher way. Like he’s genuinely trying to make you know better but he’s just ruthless at it lmao.

Verde uses a fake name and a fake everything so there’s quickly a running joke along the lines of “Imagine if it’s really the genius scientist Verde running the group and you just outed yourself as a flat earther lol”.

------

But what gets the group really popular is the in depth flames theory involving weather of all things they have to assume he came up with it all on his own because they can’t figure out to save their lives what the hell he’s talking about?

And it makes them question their sanity sometimes because Verde talks about it like it’s the most obvious thing and in the context of just about every basic aspects of life.

Cue the conspirators and their hot new take of “the aliens were among us all along and hid themselves as the WEATHER!!!” that instantly turns into the new popular meme.

That, and the transcripts posts of Verde trying his theories that nine out of ten apparently involves very unwilling participants whose life are threatened and sometimes they straight up DIE???

------

They think both of these is just him fucking with them and it’s all fictional. They want to think it is anyway.

They’re not so sure, but everyone is too afraid to ask.

*

Colonnello on Snapchat.

70% of his content is about Lal because this man is so in love and it’s like he’s a guest on his own account lol.

There’s the “Pining Hard” content where it’s just him trying to seduce Lal, to romance her and asking her out, and Lal brushing all of it off more often than not.

His followers are very invested in this “old bickering married couple type of best friends in oblivious mutual pining” real live action slow burn fic, and cheers him hard whenever Lal reciprocates the tiniest bit.

------

They don’t know the two are already together.

They think Lal brushing him off or flirting back but in an unmistakably joking/”platonic” way is just her being oblivious and not taking Colonnello seriously.

When she would just rather flirt back off camera because it’s her private life thank you very much.

Colonnello never tells them because he assumes they all know and just choose to be in on the joke.

Lal finds it hilarious whenever she goes through his Snapchat (with his permission of course) to find numerous messages of encouragement, so she never says either.

------

But one day she kind of just steals a kiss from him while he’s recording because she wanted to, and his followers lose their shit.

Lal laughs herself to tears and laughs for days.

------

The other Lal’s related content is the “Lal’s loving hours”, where he just takes pictures of her/records her doing random shit---whether it's her making a disaster out of the kitchen, or wearing three pairs of socks because her feet are cold, or beating the shit out of someone---and him doing heart eyes at the camera.

------

Otherwise it’s just him living his life and letting them in on what happens.

There’s a lot of pictures because he’s handsome and he knows it and he likes the compliments aqsdfghj.

Or videos of him going on and on about how energy drinks are really the best drink ever while doing grocery.

Or ranting videos about how bullets wounds are such a pain to deal with and showing himself patching himself up to show how it’s done (thanks??!!??).

Or him watching series and roasting the characters for their dumb decisions.

Or him commenting in real time an assassination attempt on him in the middle of the night in his own fucking home because the fucker sure is ballsy (????!!!!!!???).

It’s very popular too because of how relatable it is.

Well, most of the time anyway.

*

Viper on Youtube.

They have a DIY type of channel, mostly about fashion---what they think about the new products/clothes they bought from their favorite brand, their thoughts on the new fashion trend, their makeup/skin care routine and favorite outfits for various circumstances, or they’re often on live while going shopping.

(I just really like Fashionista!Viper okay.)

They play videos games too, thinking they’re being very good while being very average to not say they straight up suck asdfghj.

Occasionally do reaction videos too.

------

Like Reborn they hardly ever show their face. Actually they don’t show it at all lol. They wear masks to do their videos because a hood is not very reliable.

How do they do their makeup videos then you ask?

They use "volunteer" as models of course.

And by volunteers I mean the Varia qsdftgyhjkl.

------

They also have another very peculiar brand of videos that is the most popular one on their channel. The titles of these videos include but are not limited to:

“A Due Payment Of Yours Is Late? How To Hunt Them For Sport”

“A Little Bitch Doesn’t Respect Your Pronouns/Chosen Name? Step By Step On How To Make Them Shut The Fuck Up Forever”

“How To Efficiently Remove Blood And Various Others Human Residue From Your Clothes”

“Faking Your Death And Taking On A New Identity: Step By Step Tutorial”

“How To Take Over Your Friends Brains And Watch Them Prank Themselves ft. The Varia”

*

Fon on Tumblr.

His blog becomes known as a shitpost blog or a blog run by a bot when really, everything he posts is about actual, very real events that happened in his life.

Except he vague posts every time because he really wants to keep his anonymity.

He posts about the hardships of learning more and more martial arts and staying at the top of the art, and sounds like some dangerous psychopath.

“The body is such a fragile thing, isn’t it? It tends to break quite easily unfortunately. You’d think I’d know that by then, but I really need to remember it more often so I can keep enjoying myself.”

He’s talking about how he always pushes himself too much in training and ends up injuring himself.

“Everyday I dispose of them and reasserts my superiority, and everyday they come back and it’s really hard to not hurt them beyond repair.”

He’s talking about how he’s often challenged by other martial artists who don’t like him being the best and how he always has to beat them up bloody for them to give up.

He also posts about his family's live except it’s the Hibari’s family live, and he doesn’t sound more sane of mind at all.

“I made the mistake of taking Kyo with me on my grocery trip and picked on his tell-tale signs of going through a bad day too late.

But fortunately the shop is still standing and no one was heavily injured.”

or:

“It’s so heartwarming to see Kyo make friends. The brown haired kid didn’t put much of a fight but the one with the pineapple haircut has potential.

He almost managed to stab him that one time, and I can’t wait to tease Kyo about it. He’s very cute when annoyed and embarrassed.”

or:

“Often I look back to the day Kyo got his tonfa and I am always infinitely grateful for this not-so-easy-to-kill-with weapon.

I would like for him to at least finish high school first.”

Yeah it’s very often about Kyoya lmao. And no one knows for sure what in the world a “Kyo” is supposed to be???

An actual human being is NOT the most popular theory qsdfghn.

*

Lal on TikTok.

I guess?? I’m kind of running out of ideas lol, and I know very little about TikTok.

But I’m thinking she makes a series of videos where she looks straight into the camera like she’s on The Office while some bullshit or the other happens in the background.

And it’s not even always her friends or coworkers or Colonnello (yeah he has a category of his own lmao).

As far as she is concerned everyone who chooses to be a fucking dumbass in her vicinity is asking for it aqsdfghj.

------

Also has a “Doing paperwork” series, and the later at night she’s doing it, the more she’s absolutely fucking done with people not being able to do their job properly without collateral damage.

She dryly reads out loud the highlights of the reports and goes straight for their lives lol.

But as funny as it is, everyone is more interested in the very questionable out of context content of these reports???

------

Also does workout videos, as in she demonstrates how to do this one or other exercise, and if these do particularly well it has nothing to do with how people want to look respectfully at her body, of course not.

ALSO has a “Colonnello’s Loving Hours” series because you better believe this woman is also so much in love.

She records him when he’s simply existing---whether he’s snuggling besides her while they’re watching TV, or dancing in the kitchen while cooking, or cleaning his guns---while looking at the camera with this tender, content expression on her face.

*

They become known as the Weather Lovers because boy, do these people like to go on about their favorite weather. Some shipping might even be involved??

It’s how their community introduces them to each other.

Cue even more chaos on their respective socials medias.

Viper’s video of their first meeting is the most popular one on their channel.

*

Yeah I know, I didn’t add the Sky Arco ladies, but I have no idea what they could do. Pinterest maybe? Or Vine? Dunno, they’re all yours guys lol.

[luci-cunt]

Tips for ADHD-ers (and non <3)

idk I’ve noticed during Quarantine I’ve been mega understimulated a lot and thought maybe other ppl were suffering with the same shit so here’s just some general tips to make your lives easier <3 (and I said non because idk, if they work for u make ur like easier babey! <3)

Cleaning/ Organizing/ Thriving!

Try to make everything immediately viewable: like, don’t put cans of soup behind pasta sauce--you will forget you have it. Get shelves and then mini-shelves for shelves so the stuff behind will still be visible or hang things up! Clear storage containers are your BEST friend I promise--for food leftovers, art supplies, etc, I know it might not look the nicest to some people but seriously it’ll save u from buying 1000000000 packs of glue because you can’t remember you put them in some special box.

Set up a chore schedule: I know for myself at least it’s so hard to remember (esp with quarantine) if I’ve showered recently or when the last time I washed my sheets was. Take a page out of your kindergarten and make a chore sheet!! Assign specific chores to specific days (try only assigning one chore per day also, don’t overload it’s just to make sure you do it!) and then you don’t have to worry about remembering to do things because you’ve got a schedule. 

Tacking onto that, make designated ‘tidy’ days! For example: I have Wednesday as my designated dish day, I try to do the dishes everyday, but sometimes I’m just not in the mood and just leave them in the sink, but on Wednesdays I make sure to gather everything up and clean it in one go. Doing this with dishes, pet cleanup, general tidying, working out, and fridge clean out is really good!!!

Another addition (because I will never stop talking about chore schedules they’re literally life savers) make designated meal days!! It’s really easy for me to get lost in the days and eat nothing but instant noodles for months straight, so I try to reserve a few days a week for designated meals (ex. tuesdays = dinner, fridays = lunch, sundays = breakfast) where I try to either actively make something, or just make a meal plan for the next day. It doesn’t have to be anything big, but just try to spice up these meals, aka if you’ve been eating nothing but eggs for breakfast make pancakes instead!

(btw: for all of these things you still do them off their��‘designated’ day, like if this week you’re a pro and have made dinner ever day then hell yeah!! it’s mostly just for if you’re stuck and need help pulling yourself out of a lurch <33. Just make sure you try to keep up the routine so a habit forms)

Get soap/ cleaners you like: idk about u guys but now especially that I’ve moved out I just had been using the cleaners my mom used cuz that’s all I knew, but she always used simplegreen and windex which make my head hurt like a bitch and made cleaning an actual hell--BUT!! there are other options!! Look into what you like, or try natural cleaners (vinegar, baking soda, and lemon juice are honestly better than most cleaners and they don’t smell chemically)!! You have options!! make cleaning easy on yourself!

Writing/ Studying Tips

Outline as you go: open a new doc while writing that’s just for brainstorming and write 3 headings: “Characters” / “Plot” / “Snippets” then, as you’re writing if u get an idea about a character or the plot or a snippet of dialogue you want to remember, stick it in your brainstoming doc. This has saved my ass so many times, because outlining is actual hell if you don’t want to do it. This way you remember all the lil details you thought of while writing, and you can stick them somewhere and go back to writing. Plus then you have all these awesome details in one place!!

Change music depending on stress level: this one seems pretty obvious, but it’s honesty very hard to remember. If you’re trying to focus on something very difficult but you also can’t do it in silence but you can’t stop focusing on the song’s words? Find music in a language you don’t understand and vibe to that, and if even that’s too difficult listen to music without any words at all! If you dunno how to start here’s a french pop playlist and here’s an only instrumental study playlist!

Don’t force it!!! Have you been sitting there reading the same sentence seventeen times and you still have no idea what it says? Listening to a lecture but you realize suddenly you’ve been zoning out the whole time? Getting frustrated becuase you know you can understand something but you also can’t at the same time? Take a breath--stop trying to bully through it. Usually when this happens to me I’m blocked some way and I have to either take a walk or find another way to consume whatever it is I’m doing. Aka: if you’re watching a lecture, turn on subtitles and read them as you watch. If you’re reading, copy the text and paste it into this text-to-speech reader and listen to it. Here’s also a Chrome extstention that will turn your articles into podcasts for you! just change that shit up!! stop trying to force it!! be nice to yourself!

I’m so sorry this is blocks of text aljsdlkja;dkljf idk how to do it any other way but I hope some of this was helpful?