#and I ended up being unable to look away from adam because I saw much of the same qualities in him

[alwayshappyhoursomewhere]

Cup of China 2023 - Adam Siao Him Fa and Shoma Uno during the men’s victory ceremony

[b3jewe1ed]

in the spirit of saw x the hunger games au i was talking about earlier i came up with some backstory for it. SPOILER — it’s kind of long and (obviously) mentions death and blood.

i probably will write something based on this idea soon. i just need to find some confidence in my writing and since english isn’t my first language, i also need to make sure it will be as grammatically correct as possible.

but anyways:

• i had troubles figuring out from which district they would be from, but i think district 3 is most fitting,

• lawrence won the 56th game and adam won 68th,

• lawrence’s leg got cut off by district 7 tribute, because she thought it would make him unable to run away as she was killing his friend,

• he did manage to run away, but he was unable to save his friend, so he left her there to eventually bleed out,

• he probably avenged his friend very quickly after though,

• he won his game by what he considers pure luck. he didn’t kill anyone at the end. the last person besides him, district 9 guy, was very sick and couldn’t fight back. he made it so far because he was hiding all the time. he just decided that he will kill himself and he did just that,

• capitol considered him a „boring” victor, because they thought he became useless and unattractive after losing his leg. they also thought he wasn’t as interesting as they wanted him to be, because he didn’t kill the last person standing. this led to them quickly forgetting about him after his victory,

• adam’s game was quite different,

• it was harsh from the very beginning and he wasn’t as strong as people around him,

• the setting wasn’t helping him either,

• he just thought he could hide as long as it was possible and pray,

• it kind of worked, because other people seemed to forget about him, until he was found by the careers,

• one girl almost strangled him to death, but district 9 guy came across the scene and helped adam out,

• they both killed all the careers (it was mostly district 9 guy’s work, but still they worked as a duo from that moment) and that’s when they instantly became capitol’s favourites,

• everything was going good for them, until the other guy got poisoned by berries he found and he didn’t make it, leaving adam alone once again,

• adam then tried to make some makeshift traps to help himself out, but only one of them worked,

• at the end, where it was only him and district 7 girl it became very violent and he got to win by the girl’s mistake,

• after the game capitol loved him, they thought that the fact he was weak at the beginning was just a part of his plan (even though it wasn’t, he was weak at the beginning but gained some skills observing other people throughout the game). they said he was very smart so they wanted to see as much of him as possible,

• he was basically everywhere, they were torturing him with interviews, photoshoots etc.

• he was very tired of it, so he came up with an idea. he cut his face a little to make himself appear unattractive to the capitol and it worked. even though they still considered him a intelligent, violent mastermind they were still capitol citizens. all they cared about was the looks.

• they still bothered him sometimes, but it wasn’t as much as it was before,

• this is when they both met, in the victor’s village. after being forgotten by the capitol adam spent more time in there and one day he met lawrence,

• they both bonded over the fact that they were district 3 winners, but also the fact how quickly they became forgotten after their victory,

• and now something i came up with while writing this,

• they met another district 3 victor, john,

• i won’t write much about him, because i haven’t figured out his role in this yet, but i do have a feeling he could be the one to know something about lucy gray, i mean, their games were close to each other so he definitely heard about her,

• i also have a district 5 amanda in mind, but haven’t figured out her role in there yet,

• all i know about her is that she was allies with lynn in her game, but in the end betrayed and killed her to win the game,

• i think i can say that lynn was a career,

• all the tributes from lawrence’s and adam’s games i mentioned were written with certain saw characters in mind, but i didn’t want to mention their names now until i’m fully convinced of the storyline

that’s all, if you read that all you’re a real one and i love you. can’t say that i will write it for sure, but i’ll try my best

[spotaus]

Had a bunch of Doppletale ideas during my shower so I'm putting then under the Cut!

1) Kale stays underground for a really long time (<- That one's already established. It's like, 6-7 years I believe?) But I think that it's drawn out so long because, not only is K terrified (rightfully so) but Sans is also *extremely* hesitant to tell K about the rest of the underground. Like, he explains if she outright asks him, he wouldn't lie, but even then he cautions her with the most grave explanation when she asks about going past Waterfall for the first time. The further away from Snowdin she ventures, the less he can ensure she's safe. He's honestly terrified for the day she goes to see Asgore. He knows he'll have to Judge her, and that he'll have to accompany her to Asgore, and the last time he escorted someone to the barrier he snapped and killed them just before reaching the king. No matter how many years she's been around and how much better he gets with physical contact, he's so afraid he'll lose himself in that Judgement Hall again.

2) The barrier is fundamentally misunderstood by the monsters of the underground. They believe that to pass the barrier, Monsters must eat Humans and become 'human-like' to escape. This came about after Chara fell and the royal family adopted them. Chara was only a human child, and back then no one was starving. The royal family had recently had Asriel, so when Chara came to them, they thought the best way to teach their son to transform was to have a real human to mimic. Chara was off-limits for meals, and they grew up alongside Asriel as his sibling. Then one day Chara fell ill (ran out of human-food) and Asriel insisted that they go to the surface to get Chara more food. No one saw the whole story. How Chara was coughing blood as they exited the barrier, abd how they were holding Asriel's hand as he slipped through right behind them, disguised as a human child. The monsters had assumed that Asriel ate Chara and escaped the barrier. When Asriel returned to the underground, it was months later, and he only came back because he'd been spotted as a "changeling" by the villagers and had been attacked, separated from Chara and the family he'd been staying with. He "died" inside the barrier, unable to explain how he'd escaped in the first place. (He takes the form of Chara often when he's Flowey if only because it's one of the few faces he remembers.) So, the monsters assumed they had to be perfectly human by consuming more humans to escape. They're wrong. (It actually takes a human putting trust into a monster to give them the chance to cross, and the monster has to view the human as something other than food. As an equal. So, for the barrier to break, the entire underground has to recognize, on some level, that a human is more than food.)

3) Ghost Monsters don't eat Humans, and therefore are the most sane monsters underground by far. All four ghost-monsters were haunting objects that were held onto by humans that had been killed by the monsters, and ended up trapped underground by accident. The only time Ghost Monsters pose a threat is when they try to possess a human. The Ruins Ghost inhabits a dummy (one that's unsettlingly human-shaped that looks like it's been gnawed on by the ruins monsters quite a bit) and it has no intention of harming humans, though it will occasionally appear behind humans or in corners without warning. Napstablook is actually harmless, but wails and cries like a tortured soul. The only thing that calms him is his music. Mad Dummy ends up being the most dangerous Ghost to humans, but much like ruins dummy he inhabits a strange human-anatomy dummy in the waste-dump. He desperately wants a human to possess so he can pass the barrier and escape his wrongful imprisonment. Lastly MTT is obviously still in his robot-body, but as a monster who stays sane while Alphys goes insane, as Sans leaves, as everyone around him starves, he stays adamant that he has to look out for those who aren't able to care for themselves. (In this AU he's never Box shaped.)

3.5) MTT hosts the radio underground. After Alphys damaged him with a trap, he decided that he couldn't bring himself to be on-screen. Instead he uses Alphys' camera system to broadcast a sort of news-station to all the radios in the underground. He's the Star of the underground, and a lot of monsters would claim that MTT was the only reason they didn't lose sanity already. His daily broadcasts always had something new, even after countless years, as his voice was calming and friendly, something monsters didn't have enough of. His very last broadcast is one where he announces it's his last broadcast, because the Barrier is broken. (I also think he'd eventually offer to endorse K to the underground citizens, which has a lot more sway than anyone expects in making Monsters not want to immediately devour K.) (Maybe he's even on the radio when/before K has to speak with Asgore, to take calls from the underground asking opinions on "the Kindness Soul" roaming the underground, and it's a shocking amount of Positivity that they get in response???)

3.6) On the surface, MTT would genuinely become some sort of influencer online. He'd probably love to do Storytimes or Vlogs, and have like a d.i.y. channel. He uses this popularity he gains to slowly but surely change the public opinion on monsters (at least some of them) and help advocate for them to not be ostracized. With advancements in tech, he wouldn't be immediately grouped with the monsters when appearing, so as someone from "outside" either side of the drama and such a positive force he could gather some support. (However, Papyrus and Blooky remain his #1 fans no matter how many new ones he gains.)

And finally, @oodlesndoodles because I promised I'd @ them, and Ood is the designer of Kale/K, the human mentioned for Doppletale's True Pacifist route!

[canyouheatmeuponafrozennight]

Read: Paradise Lost

Satan, Adam, God, Paradise and Family

Satan

Making Satan too sympathetic got Milton in trouble at the time, which at first indeed might seem like a wild stance to take, especially at the time. Too human for Christians, too pitiful for a satanist. People need their icons to be perfect, even if for that they must be dehumanized or have their darkness hidden (Even Christ is treated that way, as some don't allow him to have feared death or have loved a prostitute and so on). I've seen commentary that says everything Satan speaks is a lie, the sympathy one might feel for him stems from his gaslighting, but I don't think that's what Milton was writing with him.

The reason he is the protagonist for half the book, the reason he is drawn sympathetically, is because Satan is Adam. If we're being technical, Satan, Adam and Christ are all brothers (I'd even argue Man's knowledge of good and evil, the possibility of swinging either way itself works within that metaphor. The neutral path that is man, the evil that is Satan and the good that is Christ, these are the three paths created by God through his direct children) but the biggest parallels are drawn between Satan and Adam, that's why it matters that we meet and know him. (Sin is born from Satan, and from their incestuous union comes Death. Eve is born from Adam, and from their incestuous union comes humankind, for one.)

Second, both are expelled from paradise, both are rejected by their father. Satan, unable to accept his younger brother as superior (was Hokuto no Ken Paradise Lost-inspired?) rebels against his father and falls to a hell of his making. Still, ruling over hell sounds greater than serving God in Heaven, therefore he accepts that punishment pretending it doesn't even hurt. However, still bitter and looking to frustrate God in return nevertheless, he departs to ruin God's new plan. In other words, he must corrupt his youngest brother to piss God off.

One passage that feels very much like a convoluted family drama, is how God feels conflicted on Man's punishment because erasing man would allow Satan to mock him for throwing away his favorite children the moment they cross him once. A father pressured by the judgemental eyes of the eldest son, the only child old and wise enough to be able to call out his wrongdoings.

Satan is bitter and childish, but paradoxically, also the only adult in the story that can talk back to God, that can challenge providence. As the corruptor of Man, our greatest-uncle did leave this gift for us, the power of evil to confront those who might be mightier than ourselves for our own sake. Satan is self-tempted, he chose for himself to go against God, which I do have to say is more admirable behavior than Adam and Eve's being tempted by another (but also the reason why Satan's punishment was more severe; they could be excused as someone else was to blame at least). Jeanne D'arc ending up as she did might not be a surprise, as the strength to stand up by yourself is indeed a satanic trait.

Satan is very much a prototype of Adam, human-like and sinful, angry and rebellious, he can't see his punishment as his fault, he can't see his failures as his failures. Powerful enough to fight against God, but not pure enough to recognize what he's done, what he has broken; he can't see that he lost Paradise.

Adam

Our greatest-father, Satan with a bit less bite. Personally, a character that always existed within me, perhaps one of the first literature character I've met, but to me never a person, just a symbol. Adam and Eve started mankind, that line is all they were to me, until this book.

I feel the need to start with the line that moved me most, that connected me the most to Adam: When I saw [Eve], all that was beautiful until now, no longer was. The rest of his descriptions of Eve, of being with Eve all rung true within my heart to. I know how it was because he was just like me; a man in love with a woman (Hadestown)

It's easy to say "these two lived in Eden but then lost it all," but what lies before, between and after that, isn't something the Bible makes you think about, but Paradise Lost does. The solitude of a man alone in Paradise for God knows how long, meeting with his soulmate and getting to experience life by her side in a place you two know nothing but peace and joy and good. Thinking about experiencing that, and losing that, makes a short line about the original progenitor which has no meaning gain much more weight, gain significance.

When a now sinful Eve approaches him and tempts him into also consuming the fruit, he thinks about how he can't live without her, and would rather betray God than her. Once he obtains evil he lashes out and says it's her fault this happened, but what I see drawn here is the shape of true love. Before he knew evil, he'd rather die than be without her, once he did, he felt like arguing and playing the blame game. When we love someone to the point of doing anything for them, to be with them, that's Adam within us, the purest, God-betraying love that rests within us is also his gift.

Scared and regretful, Adam, unlike Satan, can tell he lost Paradise, that things won't be good anymore, not only for him and Eve, but to their children. They'll know death, they'll know illness, they'll know pain. Is it worth bringing a child into this world, knowing this is what awaits them? Milton a father himself, in an age much less kind than ours, probably could write that feeling with much more personal investment than one might infer from the text. To answer that question, Raphael comes to Adam and shows him the future, sins, war and plague, but also salvation, redemption and forgival.

When a tragedy occurs, it's not the end of the world. You can make good out of evil. Satan's betrayal created man. Man's betrayal brought Jesus and many other heroes. Mankind was born in sin, but doesn't need to live in sin. That is the positive, existentialist meaning of this journey, when Paradise is Lost (the end of the book), the real story (history) begins.

God, Paradise and Family

Seeing God as a father and Paradise as the nest, the story of Genesis is much more familiar than holy. The father/mother provides all they can to give their children happiness while they're immature, but one day they'll grow and develop, until they no longer can sleep on that same nest. The kids one day will leave and become Gods of their own Paradises, maybe create and provide for their Adams until these are ready to also leave and become gods too. When the fruit makes Adam and Eve become like gods, this is what it means, that these children now will fend for themselves, instead of live under their parent's wings.

Adam's sorrow, however, is probably a feeling that can't be done justice. I'll speak of not being in talking terms with your father, and we'll know our feelings, the feelings of our peers who went through that, the portrayal of characters that went through that. Adam, however, was the first person to experience that "loss," that "grief," even. He prayed because he knew his father would listen, but God would never talk to him again. For 900 years, Adam lived regretting and trying to reconnect, trying to obtain forgival. He was at his happiest when God visited, everyday, always at the same time; what is this if not a child who waits for his dad to get home again? His sin innocent, his punishment eternal and heartwrenching, a torture of the soul probably heavier than the shadow of death and the guilt of sin.

My mother often talks about wanting to see her late mother again, wanting to talk about things which happened, happy and sad. Is that sadness one that can be sublimated in 900 years, or one that only grows with time? Do you think it'd be silly to pray for Adam today, and ask God to forgive him? As a timeless being, perhaps something done today can still change the past. Maybe something can still be done about God and Adam. At least I want to believe that, because otherwise the melancholy is just too overwhelming.

[lightsoffhoney]

Ooooh, saw that your asks were open... i couldnt pass the opportunity honey, can i request shiva and rudra sharing a s/o.

Hear me out, these two are the dynamic duo from the comics. Before shiva having 4 wives (the 1st wife wasnt even in the comics just the 2nd to 4th), they used to share women... or is it just me?

It can be in a scenario or hc, either way i feel like they used to do this until shiva had his own harem

-🍰

the way my stomach curled when reading this because yes absolutely they did i mean they were inseparable. look at them

!! 18+ ; spit roast, facefucking,degradation, praise, hair pulling, face sitting, dumbification, please take care before proceeding !!

though probably not at first

at first im thinking they went drinking at the end of the day and each took his partner to a room separately

their tastes may be similar but they somehow always managed to find different people

but maybe they got really drunk and saw someone that got them both absolutely smitten

and it probably started some sort of competition between them over who could please you the most

8 hands and one person?? how could you ever turn the offer down

shiva would take your mouth first, rudra making you sit on his face, two of his arms gripping your thighs and pushing you down

the way you whined while rudra ate you out had shiva putting both hands on your head and pushing your mouth all the down his cock

“that’s right, angel,” he’d groan “don’t forget about me,”

his other two hands played with your chest while he was face fucking you

the sensation was too much

“what’s wrong, lamb?” rudra asked, “i can feel you clenching around my tongue.”

“Poor baby wants to cum,” his friend teased, pushing your head all the way down again watching your eyes roll to the back of your head

rudra smirked and shoved you back down on his face, one of his hands starting to rub circles around your clit

You groaned around his friend’s dick, trying to move up but being held down

“mffgggg pleathee,” you moaned “pleatheee,”

he pulled you off his cock with a grin, taking in the fucked out look on your face, the drool gathering on your chin and your swollen lips

new kink unlocked

“god she’s so pretty,” he grunted, leaning down and kissing you while you creamed around rudra’s tongue

when he pulled away, he grabbed your hair and kissed you as well, making you taste yourself

“such a good girl,” he cooed, watching your tongue loll out, hand lightly tapping the sides of your cheek “open wide for me, pretty girl.”

shiva watched as he grabbed your face and spat inside, your eyes completely transfixed on him as you swallowed

he was discovering so many new things

before shiva could think twice about it, rudra had already lined you up with his cock and shoved himself in all the way

the stretch had tears gathering at the sides of your eyes but they didn’t let you rest

“i guess ill just blow my first load in your mouth,” shiva groaned, pushing your open mouth on his cock, muffling your moans

Rudra rolled his head back as he pumped into you, feeling your pussy clench around him every time shiva shoved his cock down your throat

“stupid whore, fuuckk you’re so fucking tight ” he groaned “my stupid fuuuckkkk just like that baby little mfffgghh whore, going even stupider on my dick ”

shiva was quiet, unable to take his eyes off the way you looked up at him while he was shoving his dick in and out of your mouth

you looked absolutely ruined but he wanted to ruin you even more and it was like you were begging him to

so who was he to deny such an adamant request?

[majestyeverlasting]

can you write prompts 3&10 with beefy!bucky x reader where he takes her on a surprise date under the stars n they cuddle n it’s cute n shit :)

✩ Alas, the time has come for a night under the stars. These prompts are amazing together, and tried my best to make it as cute as possible. It takes place in Brooklyn, and there's fairly lights, caresses, and of course kisses. A sprinkle of innocent teasing as well. Thank you so much for your patience, and I hope you enjoy.

✩ Prompt 3: “I told you the stars were gonna be out tonight.”

✩ Prompt 10: “It’s hard to concentrate when you’re kissing my neck like that.”

Brighter Than We Know

The same sky that was once a rich blue mixed with the warmth of orange had begun to welcome the beginnings of darkness. Only a trace of daylight remained, nothing more than a fleeting hint of illumination that proved the sun once shone over Prospect Park. That's where the two of you found yourselves, settled on a red blanket in a clearing of grass with a view of the lake. A few small mason jars filled with fairy lights were positioned on the ground around you.

The hands of time always seemed to move faster when you and Bucky were together. An indescribable easiness never failed to accompany his presence.

There was a warmth to the air of the budding night, and cricket chirps ascended from all around. Bucky sat with his legs outstretched, leaning back onto his hands. And you laid perpendicular to him with your head resting in his lap, gazing upwards and allowing yourself to be lulled by the atmosphere. When you closed your eyes, he traced a finger along your hairline and all the way down to follow the curve of your jaw. A pleasant tingle was left in its wake. The content hum that rose from your throat served as all the encouragement he needed to continue.

However, as his fingertips began to trace your lips, you opened your eyes and took his hand in yours—you’d always adored his hands. They were so strong and yet so gentle. You pressed a kiss to his palm, smiling at the way his fingers curled ever so slightly. Then you let go, and he continued to caress your features as if trying to further engrain them in his mind.

Soon, Bucky eventually said. Soon it would be dark enough for the stars to be seen in the heavens above. There was an inkling of doubt that you ended up voicing to him, but he soothed it with an easy smile and another promise that it was only a matter of time. The outing itself had been his idea. After dinner, you were expecting to go back to his apartment. But that’s when he’d told you that there was one more thing he’d planned.

Curiosity getting the better of you, you’d asked him question after question as the two of you arrived at Prospect Park, and began to walk through it; even going over your favorite bridge, and getting to hear the trickle of the small waterfalls leading into the pond beneath. There was something different about the way he was holding your hand, he was guiding you. Not merely walking with you.

It came to the point where the path you’d been following was no longer lined with trees. That’s when you saw everything in the grass a short distance away—the blanket, the mason jars. There were others out enjoying the stillness, but nobody occupying that space. Surely, that wasn’t for you two. But he led you right to it, and your heart soared in awe. There were a couple pillows and a bag of your favorite chocolate as well. You’d attempted to ask Bucky how he’d managed to put everything together, but the only answer he gave you was that he'd had help from somebody who was fond of the two of you.

Ms. Cleary. It had to have been her. Bucky winked when he saw the realization in your eyes. Virginia Cleary was a kind, older woman who lived across the hall from him. She spoke whenever she saw you, and had given him an original canvas painting of hers back when they first got acquainted. Her husband had passed away years prior, and her son worked as a businessman upstate. So she took pleasure in being caring and nurturing towards the two of you.

In that moment, you swore your gratitude for them was endless. The week had been so demanding of you, and in an instant their efforts had lifted the ghost of the weight that lingered on your shoulders.

Bucky began to shift, and you realized it was because he was lying onto his back. Naturally, you repositioned as well, opting to snuggle into his side and rest your head on his broad chest. You felt its steady rise and fall as his arm wrapped around you. He smelled woodsy with a hint of something warm and spiced. The dark gray shirt he wore defined his upper body, and you let one of your hands run up his torso, and over the hard shoulder of his metal arm. There was a solidness to his muscularity, but he was relaxed underneath your touch. There was no tension to be felt.

You glanced at his face, and saw that his eyes were directed upwards. You followed his gaze to where the stars still had yet to appear. Any moment, though. You craned your head and began peppering featherlight kisses to the crook of his neck. His stubbled Adam's apple bobbed with a swallow. And you felt him squeeze your waist as the exhales leaving his nose grew more audible.

“Doll.” His voice was gruff. “It’s hard to concentrate when you’re kissing my neck like that.”

You hummed, but went on to start nibbling his skin, unable to contain a smile. After a few more seconds, you relented, and heard him whisper something quick under his breath. A chuckle bubbled out of you, as you propped yourself on his chest.

“What was that?”

He lips twitched upwards. “I said ‘please give me the strength.’”

You playfully clawed your fingers in his thick pecs. “You’re already pretty strong.”

“Not up against you, I’m not.” There was love in his eyes. A silence settled between the two of you for a few moments. You even let your cheek come to rest on your arms as they were folded on top of his chest.

But then Bucky shook your shoulder after a while. “Hey, look up, pretty girl. You can see ‘em shining now—all over.” His voice was low and measured, proud too.

As if charged, you pushed yourself up into a seated position, eyes wide and curious as they began to scan the vastness of the sky. They seemed to be everywhere, the stars. Some were clustered whereas others seemed to be off by themselves. But no matter the distance, none of them were truly alone as they shone amongst each other.

“See there, pretty girl?” Bucky said. “I told you the stars were gonna be out tonight.”

The moment you turned around to look down at him, he feared being awakened because your smile looked like something out of a dream. The glow of the fairy lights and the lampposts in the distance just barely helped illuminate your face—he saw you nonetheless. In a way only he could, however. He saw beyond your appearance, to what radiated from within you: the childlike wonder you held onto like a friend, your constant pursuit of the ‘extra’ in the ordinary, the love you were always so willing to extend. The extent of your beauty was a fountain that never ran dry.

Bucky thanked his lucky stars that out of every soul in the universe, he got to grow in the understanding of yours.

“You did tell me,” you spoke up. “Thank you. For this—for everything.” You meant that, strongly.

“Of course. Figured you’d appreciate it. I know you’ve been working really hard, and that you…”

His words trailed off as you moved to lay on your stomach beside him. You remained propped on one forearm, and rested your free hand on his chest before dipping your head down to kiss him. But not on his lips quite yet. You pressed one to the tip of his nose, then some to both corners of his mouth. Flutters of anticipation stirred within his chest, and you rendered them into longing when you placed yet another to the dimple of his chin. The sight of you pulling away to study his face made him release a quick exhale of disbelief tinged with amusement. You gave him a little knowing smirk before finally leaning back down to connect your lips.

Bucky used his weight to push you onto your back so that he was the one hovering over you. In the process, your lips parted, only to find each other once again. The way he kissed you was more tender and reverent than anything. But of course, fueled by that spark of passion that was always alight whenever he was with you.

After pulling away, he dipped to return the little kisses you’d given his neck. The added scratch of his stubble drew the sweetest giggles out of you that you attempted to stifle by biting your lip. Bucky felt like he was floating as he detached himself from you entirely, letting himself roll onto his back once again.

There the two of you were, buzzing and looking up at a sky full of stars.

Bucky took your hand in his, and ran his thumb over the back of it.

“They’re the brightest I’ve seen them in a while,” he said.

You squeezed his hand. “And they’re even brighter than we know because they’re so many miles away.”

-

✩ Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed your night under the stars.

✩ More fluffy Bucky fics

[dykefight]

I want to share some of the experiences of my loved ones and myself that started leading me to radical feminism

One of my best friends (currently a 19 year old college student) used to have an onlyfans and currently sells underwear online. She says that the most humiliating moments of her life happened on onlyfans and similar websites. She had guys ask things like would she have sex with her brother, could she cry on camera, or if she would piss herself for them. There were two men she encountered that still make me sick to think about. The worst one was a man who regularly paid for videos of her pretending like she was being raped by him without a condom. She would beg for him to stop, not to impregnate her, and she cried and screamed. She was not allowed to get any pleasure from it or she wouldn’t get paid. The man only found pleasure in the idea of a teenage girl being traumatized and abused. The other man paid her to dominate him over the phone. He wanted her to control every aspect of his life. He was nearly 30 at the time while she was 18. The worst part of this ordeal was that they knew each other from when she was around twelve or thirteen. During this time I watched her mental health rapidly decline. Her poor mental health ended up causing her to quit less than a year after starting her account. Now she sells underwear and the conditions are no better. She’s been asked to sell worn underwear, underwear she’s pissed in, underwear with her period blood in it, and underwear she’s worn while masturbating. She has been masturbating so frequently that her skin over her clit has begun peeling. The idea that this is empowering her as a woman makes me sick. It’s basically a form of self harm. Anytime I mention that she might need to slow down she explodes, ranting about how she loves doing it, how it’s good money, and that it’s her choice. No woman should be brainwashed into that mindset.

Two of my other friends have been coerced by their boyfriends into sex that they didn’t want. One of them was guilt tripped into having anal sex by her boyfriend. She didn’t want to have sex until marriage, which he already knew prior. She said he looked so disappointed that she felt like she had to let him do anal. She also said this was easily one of the most painful experiences of her life. She ended up being pressured into vaginal sex only a few weeks later. Another friend was VERY adamant about saving any kind of sex until marriage. Her boyfriend pretended like this was totally fine until around a year into their relationship. He starting persuading her into giving him handjobs and blowjobs, insisting that they were meaningless acts and no big deal. She complied but still wouldn’t let him do anything sexual to her. Eventually he got impatient and decided to touch her while she was asleep on a school trip. She admits to being scarred from this, but insists that he didn’t mean any harm and that he wouldn’t do it again. In March, they were at a party together and had a fight. My friend is known for being a lightweight. While she was furious and drunk, her boyfriend was barely tipsy. He apparently decided that the best way for her to get over it was to push her into a room and have sex even though she was fully unable to consent. At some point, someone walked into the room, saw them, and told everyone at the party about it, including complete strangers. People still bring it up to her like it’s some funny story. Neither of my friends see anything wrong with their boyfriends or their actions. I, along with mutual friends, have tried to bring it up but they insist that it was a one time thing, their boyfriends didn’t know any better, and that we’re being over dramatic. It hurts me to know that they’re just one of many girls who dismiss sexual assault just because they’ve never been told what is wrong in a sexual relationship.

My mom was raped by my father while they were dating. My mom was raised in a very religious family so she saw premarital sex as one of the ultimate sins. She was okay with everything except penetrative sex. At some point, they were naked together and he saw that as an invitation. She froze up and couldn’t bring herself to stop him. That was how she lost her virginity. It wasn’t until she told me that she realized he raped her and that was only because I told her. She didn’t know she was raped until over 30 years later. She said she always thought she asked for it since she was naked around him and let him get close enough for it. She didn’t know that there are multiple types of rape until much later in life, so she never connected the dots. If she had known, she might’ve been able to save herself from the abusive marriage that followed.

Speaking of my mother and her marriage, she was also taught that getting a divorce was a sin in the eyes of god, especially if the wife initiates it. My mom couldn’t bring herself to divorce him in the beginning and then once she had kids she couldn’t divorce him until she made sure he wouldn’t get joint custody of us. She suffered through 35 years of abuse all because of some bullshit she had forced upon her since she was young. My grandma on my moms side experienced the same thing and wouldn’t divorce my grandfather who cheated on her and had a child with another woman.

These last ones are my own personal experiences. I, like many women, have faced sexual assault multiple times. The first time was when I was 12 and sexually assaulted by my long time family friend who was 15. He was best friends with my cousin who I am very close to so he also became a friend of mine. We also went to the same school. One day the three of us were at my cousins house and I was sharing a blanket with the friend. Under the blanket, he began to brush his hand along my ass which I thought was an accident since we were on a small couch sharing a blanket meant for one person. It soon escalated to him grabbing my ass under my jeans and through my underwear and then cupping my boobs. This was all while my cousin sat five feet away. When I finally got the courage to get out I got a text from the guy begging me not to tell my cousin. It took me nearly a month to tell my family and the school. My family said they would cut all contact with his family and the school said they would make sure I never had to be around him in a school setting. However, almost immediately, my family went back to being friends with his family and my school went back on their promise. Even though the guy confessed and I had the texts as evidence, he faced no real repercussions. Another guy continually harassed me over the course of our freshman, sophomore, and junior year. He’d do things like grab me, slap my ass, stick his hand down my uniform, grind against me during class while I was bent over, and he always found new ways to contact me after being blocked. When I finally told a teacher mid junior year, the way the school “punished” him was by having his football coach talk to him. This is the same football coach that’s known to indirectly slut shame girls in front of everyone. The guys behavior towards me didn’t change so I just gave up. I was never taken seriously when these incidents came to light. Everyone just assumed it was something to brush off. That it’d go away after a gentle scolding. Even my peers who say they’re all about protecting and defending women basically responded with “that sucks” and moved on.

I turned to radical feminism because it’s given me a place to be heard. I can speak my mind. Even if someone doesn’t agree with me, they’ll have a civilized discussion or simply move on rather than start an argument.

[rogue-durin-16]

HIS WARM EYES

Summary: Some members of the Order are reticent about letting in a Lestrange, specially after Snape's betrayal. Whilst taking Harry to the the burrow, an ambush has place. Everything points to Y/n, right?

Pairing: George Weasley x Slytherin!Lestrange!Reader

Genre: angst

Tags:

George Weasley: @meph1stophelian

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @skarlettmikaelson

Warnings: blood, injuries, death

A/N: OH MY GOD THIS IS SO LONG AND BAD— I AM GENUINELY SORRY BUT I HAD TO

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

Lestrange wasn't a good name.

It wasn't a good name in the streets, nor in close-doors, let alone amongst The Order.

That's why I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that they had accepted me— well, maybe 'accepted' was a strong word; they had let me in, reticent, weary, but still they had done it. Plus, after Snape's betrayal and Dumbledore's death, no one would think there was a vacant for a Slytherin and a Lestrange.

It wasn't until I found myself exiting the abandoned Grimauld's Place along with the rest of the volunteers to go to Privet Drive, that it dawned on me; they were short on people.

They were so short on people that the Order would have to swallow my name, my family and my House.

That didn't mean they would quiet down their opinions about me being there.

"I'm gonna say it." Fred announced, taking a spot in the living room's corner while Shacklebolt, Arthur and Lupin searched the place.

"Again?" Fleur groaned.

Fred had already spoken his mind about my presence before we reached Potter's house.

His and George's shocked looks had been on me since the very first moment I had walked into the old Black's home, which was understandable; last time they saw me I was joking about joining the death eaters.

Although the shock on their faces had been accompanied by very different emotions on each.

Fred's held reticence. During our school years, he had never liked me; I would dare to say he was scared of me, even.

George's gaze, on the other hand, held hope —maybe even excitement— which was comforting.

In our first year, I had managed to draw George's interest, and for three years he was adamant about Slytherins not being 'all that bad'.

George's friendship was the thread I was hanging on; he was the only thing stopping from taking the easy way and live up to my name.

The thread was cut after he asked his mother to bring me over during Christmas, which ended up in her forbidding him to talk to me. He, being George Weasley, ignored his mom's pleads and twin's scolding and still tried his best to stay close to me, so I did what was right and, at the end of our fifth year, I cut ties with him.

It hurt more than I would dare to admit.

After our drifting apart, I was forced to completely rely on Slytherins. And you see, Slytherins, as 11 year-old George would say, aren't all that bad, but the ones my name attracted were.

They were bad sort —the worst—, and keeping that company around after our sixth year wasn't the best record to have, but Merlin's sake, I was there, I had volunteered— people change.

"Son." His father warned Fred, well aware this wasn't the time, though he obviously wanted to side with him. "Don't start again."

"Someone has yet to tell me why is she here?"

"She has a name." I hissed, unable to stop myself.

"Which is why you shouldn't be here, Lestrange." The name rolled out of his tongue like poison. "She's not one to trust."

"Oi, she's willing to risk her life, isn't she?" George's words seemed to be meant to calm his twin's temper, though his warm eyes did land on mines with a reassuring look.

"Yeah but for whom?" I tried to stay quiet as Moody had asked me too, but Fred was making it quite difficult. "If something goes wrong—"

"Weasley!" Mad-eye's tone was dry as he bursted into the room. "Are you questioning my judgment?" Fred scoffed, but stayed quiet.

"If we're throwing in the surnames, you're gonna wanna know her mum's my auntie." Tonks spoke, folding her arms.

"But you're a Hufflepuff." He was quick to respond, giving me a disgusted look. "She's a Serpent."

"And you're still a mouthful, aren't you?!" I snapped, stepping forward, though Tonks gave me a lazy tug before I could get to Fred.

"Wanna fight, Lestrange?" He had taken a couple of steps in my direction already when George yanked his twins arm.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" He yelled, giving his brother a push. "She's here for Harry! She's helping! What else do you want?!"

"Oh my gosh, Georgie— get over your teen crush already, she's not on our team!" George's knuckles went visibly white, unlike his cheeks, which turned red.

"Are you done making a scene? The three of you." Bill questioned in a calm tone, resting against the window's bench. "I don't fancy the idea either, but we need help, Fred, so shut your mouth because we have things to do."

"Pity, I was enjoying the teen drama." Moody teased before grabbing his flask and the ones who would take the Polyjuice potion moved to stand in line.

"Y/n." George's hand brushed my hand, drawing my attention to him as we stood besides one another. "I'm glad you're here." He whispered with a side smile.

"Missed me much?" I couldn't help but grin back, bumping his arm with mine. I stole a proper look at him and thought I might as well ask before the mission. "So... Teen crush huh?" I wiggled my eyebrows at him, though I could feel my own face flushing.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't fancy George —could someone blame me?—, and the idea of those feelings not being unrequited was very appealing.

He only threw his head back and looked away, the half smile growing wider and more bashful. "We'll talk about it at the Burrow." He assured me, taking the flask with his right hand and squeezing mine with his left.

"If we don't die before that." I was joking, but fear was shaking me to the core.

"We won't." He looked at the potion disgusted and gave me a peeked at me saying, "You have to hear me embarrass myself first." And with a wink, he drank the potion and passed it to me.

Gosh, I couldn't get over the mission to hear him 'embarrass' himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

GEORGE'S P. O. V.

The first five minutes were calm, despite all of us being on edge. We kept checking on each other, dreading if we lost sight of someone, that someone would banish.

The storm came when we had to dive into the dark clouds.

Funnily enough, I did think it was a literal storm before entering; oh, what I would have given for it to be a literal storm.

Black, cloaked intruders flew among us, making us divide in the pairs we had been assigned to.

Lupin started casting protegos and hexes to everyone that got too close while I tried to take down as many enemies as possible.

A couple of yelled warnings were heard when both Moody and the real Harry had entered the ambush.

"WATCH OUT!" Tonks screamed, flying past me with Ron at her tail. "REMUS!" She made a signal to her husband "ESCORT!" I got the hint; we were supposed to clear Moody's and Y/n's way so it would confuse our attackers while Tonks and Shacklebolt made sure to get Harry out of there.

"ON MY LEFT!" Lupin shouted over the chaos, changing to my right for me to be by Y/n's side.

"WE'RE FUCKED!" She yelled dropping her flight to dodge an Avada Kedavra.

"WE'LL MANAGE!" I automatically dropped my flight with hers too, which was a bad decision, since we had gotten rid of the protection provided by Lupin, Mad-eye and Bill and Fleur.

Soon enough three death eaters came flying towards us.

"STUPEFY!" another Harry with the voice of Fred passed by us, closely followed by my dad.

"GO BACK UP!" Y/n was quicker than me following my father's instructions; when I did though, I realised the little formation we had going on was gone.

Suddenly, all we could hear were screams; it felt as if someone was missing but I blamed it on everyone flying around like a chicken with its head cut off.

Tonks almost crashed against me on her way down; Ron was nowhere near me, nor Lupin.

We were outnumbered, and instead of moving forward, we were stuck in the grey clouds, trying not to die.

It took me a hot second, a crash against a death eater and a couple of hexes to get to Lupin, and even when I did, it was a hard task to keep track of him.

I had just taken out someone in my way when I caught a glimpse of something my eyes refused to believe.

Snape.

Our bloody professor was trying to kill us.

I felt the need to laugh at the situation.

"GEORGE!" It was Y/n's voice snapping me out of it, although her actions shocked me even more.

Y/n casted a spell on me, pushing my broomstick to the left and consequently making me crash against Lupin and lose balance.

Then something happened, something my mind didn't quite process.

At first it felt like a slap, but the pain stung my side as if someone had sliced me with a blade.

I didn't hear my own cry, nor Lupin's desperate 'help'; I didn't feel his hands struggling to take a firm hold of me, nor my own shakily reaching to my side, searching for an injury I didn't want to find.

A second after that, everything was black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

FRED'S P. O. V.

As soon as my father and I apparated in the fields of our home, I ran into the house. For some unexplainable reason, it felt as if something wasn't right.

A couple of steps into the house were enough for that 'something' to strike me. George had been laid on the settee, barely conscious; blood was covering the side of his face, neck and left shoulder, making his hair and clothes stick to his skin.

I was left speechless at the sight, my eyes welling up while I dragged my feet towards my twin.

"Mad-Eye is dead." Bill's words, despite sounding far away, made the gears in my head turn.

Lupin was quicker than me, though, "I told you we couldn't trust a Lestrange!"

"Remus! we don't know—" Tonks tried to calm him down, just to be cut off by Bill.

"Mad-Eye and Lestrange traveled between us and" he gestured at our wounded brother, "Remus and George." His jaw twitching let me know that he was desperately trying to stay calm. "Mad-Eye is dead and my brother just lost an ear, who is it if not bloody Lestrange, Dora?"

"Bill..." Fleur held onto her fiance's arm in an attempt to ground him.

"Did you see her disapparating?" Tonks's point was logical and hopeful.

George would have sided with her.

My eyes fixed on my wounded twin again. He was as pale as a corpse now, and the absence of his ear was way more noticeable now that my mother had begun to remove the blood.

George would have sided with Tonks because he wanted to trust Y/n, and he couldn't even speak because of that same reason.

Since everyone was arguing, they missed the flash of someone apparating near the front door.

I didn't.

Before I knew it, I was running outside with my wand in hand, Lupin and Bill following me instantly when they realised what I had just seen.

"EXPELLIARMUS!" Y/n's wand flew to my hand even before I could properly see her.

My rushed march came to a halt when I was a couple of feet away from her, making Bill bump into me; she was as pale as George, maybe more.

She took a seemingly calm, deep breath before attempting to walk.

Luckily, I saw the pools of blood on her shirt and stepped to reach her before she could touch the ground.

"Oh my..." Lupin covered his mouth with both his hands and Bill stood frozen at the sight of the girl in my arms. "MOLLY!!" my old professor yelled at the top of his lungs, going as livid as me.

We shouldn't talk on impulse, I told myself, rushing into the kitchen with Y/n in my arms. A series of gasps and regretful whispers broke the silence while I laid her on the dining table.

"Y/n?" George's trembling voice was heartbreaking, and, as my dad forced him to stay on the couch, I prayed the girl in my arms would survive.

"Oh Lord..." My mother muttered, examining her. It wasn't only her shirt stained with blood; her left leg and arm were too. "Oh dear..."

"She took the blow." Lupin ran his hands through his hair, understandably stressed. After a couple of seconds, her turned to my dad and commanded, "Get him up. Quick— go get him up." His eyes stared right into my soul and I dreaded the worst, but still obeyed and helped my dad drag George to the dining table.

I heard Lupin telling Bill something about Sectumsempra, and my heart sunk.

She took the blow.

"No..." George's murmur was close to a cry, but it was enough for Y/n's eyes to snap open.

"George." tears were effortlessly streaming down her cheeks at the sight of him. "You're... A-alive..."

"Please stay" My brother fell on his knees, reaching for Y/n's bloody hand with his own. We all looked away to give them some kind of intimacy, except from my mother, who was still trying to fix the poor girl.

I heard them both whispering sweet nothings with shattered voices until only one of them died out. I looked over to Tonks, whose eyes were gleaming with tears, and then to Lupin.

I couldn't bring myself to look at George.

After a moment of intense sobbing, my dad managed to pull my twin away from the corpse, and we carried him back to the settee.

I stayed with him the night, holding his hand and assuring him it was not his fault, but I knew my words would have little effect on his state; after all, he had been in love with Y/n for years.

All those years he had spent trying to convince all of us that Y/n was a good person, that we should give her a chance; all those years begging our mother to bring her over because she wanted to see our home.

Now her body was lying on our kitchen and I knew none of us would forgive ourselves for misjudging her.

READER'S P. O. V.

"Nervous?" A tall, redheaded kid appeared besides me; I supposed he didn't know my name by the warmth and curiosity with which his eyes stared at me.

"Aren't we all?" I replied with an anxious laugh.

He seemed to think for a moment before nodding. "Fair point, though I'll probably go into Gryffindor." He assured me with a proud smile, causing my head to cast down. "What is it?"

"Oh nothing," I shrugged, aware I would not be able to befriend that sweet boy with warm eyes. "I think I'll be sorted into Slytherin."

"Nonsense!" His intentions had been obviously to reassure me, but when he realised his response only made it worse, he added. "It'd be wicked to have a Slytherin friend, though." My eyes widened at his words; did he just— "I'm George, by the way."

"I'm Y/n."

"That's a very pretty name." Professor Mcgonagall led us into the Great Hall, and before I knew what was happening, George's hand was holding mine. "It'll be fine."

The lighting of the Castle changed once the Great Hall's doors opened; a bright, white light seemed to be coming out of it.

"Wait!" My hand gripped George's before he could leave my side. "Can you hold my hand? I-I'm scared." My voice no longer sounded like a 11 year old.

For some reason I didn't comprehend, my eyes were watery, making the view in front of me blurry.

"Don't be scared, darling." When I turned to George, I didn't see a kid; it was him, in the expensive suit I had seen him mere hours ago. "I'm here."

I just nodded and, swallowing my fear, took a step ahead, and then another one, and another, until I reached the Great Hall.

[things-we-cant-say]

pretty little liar

Pairing: Ten x Female!Reader

Summary: In order to get your annoying ex off your back, you tell a little white lie that takes an unexpected turn.

Genre: College!AU

Warnings: Smutty smut, dirty dancing

Word Count: 4,867

A/N: Unable to withstand Ten’s power any longer, I had to start writing about him…or a version of him anyway. Hope someone out there enjoys my first dip into the ~imagines~ pond. ☺️

The party was in full swing by the time you and your best friend Amy arrived, the music so loud it could be heard down the street. It was a wonder the cops hadn’t broken it up yet but hey, the night was still young. Ducking through the arched doorway with Amy hot on your heels, you let her guide you into the foyer where you both stopped to take in the scene. The place was packed with people dancing, drinking and laughing—everyone apparently having a great time. Which was perfect for you because all you wanted to do was blow off a little steam and pretend you hadn’t spent the day fantasizing about committing the perfect murder.

You enjoyed school for the most part and you enjoyed your classes, but really you couldn’t wait for it all to just be over. Two extra years and your master’s degree in linguistics was almost within your grasp. You still weren’t one hundred percent what you planned to do with it (teaching was definitely out) but either way you were ready to dive into the real world. To no longer be stressed out about exams and papers and boring ass professors that constantly seemed to have a stain on their tie.

And to get far, far away from your stupid ex, Adam.

“Uh oh you have murder face,” Amy said as she peeped around to look at you. “What’s wrong?”

You shrugged. “Just in my head I guess.”

Amy hummed. “I get it. That’s why we are here though! To get fucked up and do something we regret in the morning.”

You laughed. “Guess we’re Uber-ing home.”

She grinned and grabbed your wrist, pulling you over to a table loaded with different types of alcohol. The guy ‘tending bar’ as it were winked as you two approached. “What can I get you for?”

“Something with alcohol but where we can’t taste the alcohol!” Amy exclaimed happily. “Oh! And if you’ve got any little umbrellas I’d like one of those too.”

He did finger guns and proceeded to cook something up in two red cups, sticking in two pink umbrellas when he was done. You and Amy took your drinks and after a cursory sniff, took a sip. The tequila wasn’t as strong as with a single shot but you could still detect it just not enough to make you stop drinking. Unlike Amy you didn’t plan to get completely fucked up but you weren’t going to say no to a nice buzz.

Cups in hand you migrated onto the dance floor and fell in with everyone else, bopping to the beat and scream chatting over the loud music.

“I really needed this!” Amy yelled. “Statistics is kicking my cute little ass!”

“I know what you mean!” You shouted. “But hey! Soon we’ll be done and actual jobs will be kicking our cute little asses!”

Laughing, Amy bounced up and down, sending her blonde hair flying. “Is that why you’ve been so grumpy lately? Or is it…he who shall not be named?”

With a sigh you took a big sip of your strawberry margarita. “Yeah. He keeps fucking calling me and leaving me these stupid ass messages, apologizing and shit. I’ve blocked him but he just uses someone else’s phone.”

Amy’s eyes stretched wide. “That’s like stalker behavior! Or maybe he really is sorry for what he did.”

You snorted. “Sorry for having sex with his ex in the backseat of my car? As far as I am concerned he can take his ‘sorrys’ and shove them so far up his ass they come out his mouth as safaris!”

Amy choked a little on her drink, hitting you hard on the arm in admonishment after she stopped coughing. “I hate you! I could have died!”

Her words made you smirk. “But did you? No but for real, fuck Adam. Fuck Adam and anyone who even looks like Adam!”

“Woo!” Amy threw both hands up into the air, yelping as liquid sloshed down onto her head. “Oh shit! Drink emergency I’ll be right back!”

Before you could say anything, she turned and hurried back towards the drink table. Alone in the middle of a dancing crowd, you didn’t know whether you should slink over to a corner or just keep dancing. That last thing you wanted was some random dude trying to groove with you. Of course if you decided to hold up the wall nothing would stop some random dude from trying to hit on you either. At a bit of a loss you drained the rest of your drink and did a I don’t really know anyone two step, hoping Amy would return soon.

The tequila settled nice and warm in your stomach, making you feel more at ease. Most of the people at the party were from your school but not ones you associated with on like, a daily basis. Sure you recognized a few faces from the library or cafeteria but there was no one you’d had more than a surface conversation with.

And then your eyes landed on him. Ten.

Ten was a…different sort of person altogether. He was the kinda guy CW shows thought actually existed in college, except he was very real. And very much fucking gorgeous in that unattainable way CW shows also loved. However, that sort of did him a disservice because as far as you knew, he was just a decent guy who happened to be able to do some pretty awesome things.

For example, he was an amazing dancer. The kinda dancer that just freaking mesmerized you when he moved. Had you wondering how in the hell had he taught his body to do that shit? One minute he was in total sync with everyone else and the next he was performing his solo and blowing your mind. He’d done some show a few months ago with a friend and you’d nearly flipped out of your chair watching him work. The body rolls, the attitude, the way he’d just commanded the stage…whew. Was it possible to be a fan of someone who wasn’t famous?

Then there was his art; things he designed himself or drew from memory. Art class was essentially where you’d sorta came to be acquaintances with him. You weren’t exactly good at drawing but you liked it enough that you wanted to improve, plus it helped you de-stress after particularly hard days. Ten on the other hand excelled and just like with dancing, it was interesting to watch his process. He’d described himself as a sensory artist so he wasn’t always as concerned with the end product as the professor sometimes wanted him to be. From your eye though he’d yet to create anything that wasn’t remarkable. In fact, more than once you’d wanted to ask him to design a tattoo for you, but felt it would be kinda weird. He had no idea what you were into after all. So far your conversations with him had consisted of colors and that one time he’d asked to borrow one of your brushes.

You were pretty sure he’d sold something to an art gallery.

Anyway so Ten could dance and he could draw and he could sing and he was fluent in several languages; as far as you knew the only thing he was kind of shit at was cooking. But who hadn’t set a class kitchen on fire once or twice? Or three times…

If he were an asshole—well people would probably still crush on him—you’d count that as a major flaw and want to keep your distance. But the kicker was that he could do cool things and he was nice. Dorky even especially when it came to cute animals. Was always posting pictures of himself at the animal shelter playing with the kittens and the puppies, or just acting like an idiot with friends. Yet it was that confidence that made him seem untouchable, and also made him sexy as fuck. More than once you’d fantasized about biting his Adam’s apple.

Heh.

Shaking your head, you fanned lightly at your face with both hands. Maybe stepping outside for some fresh air would be a good idea.

“Y/N!” Amy nearly tripped over her pretty sandals in her hurry to get back to you. “Weewoo weewoo weewoo!”

“Um…”

She grabbed your shoulder. “It’s a police siren! We have a code red situation here, I repeat a code red! Adam just walked in!”

“What?” You blinked and immediately looked towards the doorway, brows narrowing when you saw she was right.

Standing there in a white t-shirt in his formerly handsome glory was your ex-boyfriend, Adam. Once upon a time you’d thought the world of him; thought he was the kinda guy you could probably marry someday. The kinda guy you’d introduced your family to. Turns out he was the kind of guy that hooked up with his ex in your car repeatedly until finally being caught in the act. Sure it had been gratifying to make him and her walk home half naked but it had done nothing to quell the pain left behind. Thankfully though your pain quickly turned to anger and now you usually focused on not murdering him when he popped up. There was a lot you could forgive but cheating was firmly in the do not cross zone. Everything you’d felt for him evaporated the moment you saw him with her.

And he’d promised he was over her. Lying piece of shit, you thought to yourself.

“What the hell is he doing here?! Does he even know anyone here?” you asked with a frown.

“I dunno!” your friend said slowly. “It’s possible, big campus and all. Do you want me to help you climb out of the bathroom window?”

“Yeah my boobs aren’t fitting through one of those skinny ass windows,” you replied wryly. “Though to be honest I’m almost willing to risk it. C’mon let’s—”

It was too late. Adam spotted you like an arrow searching for its target, eyes registering shock and then elation. He reached you in three quick strides, opening his arms for a hug that he was damned crazy to expect. “Y/N. Wow you—you look amazing. I’m so glad we ran into each other.”

You huffed. “I’m not. I told you we’re over Adam. Or does me blocking your calls not get the message across?”

He exhaled deeply. “Look I know I messed up but I’m sorry. Classes were just really tough and—and Lucy and I would reminisce about old times…”

“Do I look like I give a shit? You cheated on me and we’re over.” The lie came so easily. “Besides, I’ve moved on.”

“Yeah!” Amy poked him in the chest. “She’s moved on so suck it!”

Adam arched a brow. “You’ve moved on?” He sounded skeptical and that made your blood boil. “Since when? And with who?”

You’d once heard that Hippocrates came up with the saying drastic times call for drastic measures though it wasn’t something you’d be willing to bet money on. However, standing there with your ex eying you like he just knew you were lying brought a whole new meaning to the idiom. You would one hundred percent be damned before giving him the satisfaction of gloating.

Tequila’s kicking in…

Without missing a beat, you put a hand on your hip and motioned to Ten. “Him. I’m seeing him.”

Amy made a sound like a cat having its tail stepped on while Adam gaped at you. “What? I��no. No way. You’re totally lying. I’ve seen the people he’s dated and you’re not his type at all.”

This bitch.

Twirling on your black heels, you strolled across the room to where Ten sat in an arm chair, chatting with a few of his friends. Before you could talk yourself out of it, you straddled his lap and leaned forward to whisper in his ear. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I know this is awkward as fuck—I’m so sorry—but if you just play along I will owe you big time. I’ll give you anything. You need a kidney? You can have a kidney.”

Ten’s friends had gone mute and as you sat back to gauge his reaction—or to possibly be thrown off of him—you bit your full bottom lip. His dark eyes were watching you calculatingly, his own lips pursed together like you were a riddle he needed to solve. Up close he was utterly breathtaking, all smooth skin and silky black hair that fell artfully across his forehead. He smelled incredible.

And then he spoke.

“There you are baby,” he said wrapping an arm around your waist. “I’ve been looking for you.”

That was when you figured you owed him your first born but it was fine. “Well, you found me. Sorry to keep you waiting.”

He chuckled. “You’re worth waiting for.”

His friends still looked confused though they didn’t have time to voice their opinions. Adam stalked over seconds later like a man on a mission. “So it’s true? You and Y/N are together?”

Ten tilted his head to the side and you saw the moment the lightbulb went off for him. “Yeah we’re together.”

Adam huffed. “Since when? For how long? Where did you two meet?”

Ten smirked. “Are you taking a survey or something?” He brushed his lips across your jaw, making you shiver. “The only thing that matters is that she’s mine. Let’s dance, Y/N.”

“I would love to,” you replied with a smile. You were also grateful he’d remembered your name.

You climbed off of his lap and took his hand, sending Adam a you thought look before pulling Ten out into the thick of the crowd. Your heart was beating a mile a minute but you felt too giddy to pay much attention to it. Plus, you knew Adam was watching you like a hawk and you didn’t want to let on how nervous you actually were. If he found out you were lying he’d never leave you alone and consider you pathetic to boot. Besides the nice buzz that was finally creeping down your spine told you everything would be fine. How could it not be?

Ten’s hands settled low on your hips and he gave you a little tug, pulling your back to his chest. You fit rather perfectly with him, his chin brushing the top of your head. Picking a rhythm in the song that thumped with bass, you began to move together. You rolled your ass against him and leaned your head back to rest on his shoulder, focusing on his breath as it ghosted across your neck. A silver of light wouldn’t have been able to get between you.

Normally you wouldn’t have dared to do something like this with a near stranger but your desire to make your ex suffer was bigger than your nerves. Besides Ten appeared to be all in on the ruse; his body twisting and curving in sync with yours, fingers on his right hand sliding up between your breasts to wrap lightly on your throat. His teeth nipped at your earlobe and you gasped. Reached around to his side to clasp his shirt for an anchor. You heard him chuckle and suddenly you were spun away from him only to be reeled back in, this time face to face.

The room felt like it was two hundred degrees. You weren’t exactly wearing much—a slinky black dress with tiny ties at the hem—but even that seemed too much. Without missing a beat though you and Ten continued to grind with one another, his thigh just barely pushed between your own. Every time you swayed forward to meet him the denim of his jeans rubbed deliciously against you, sending sparks sprinting through your veins. Both of his hands were on your ass as if helping to guide you, and as you met his gaze you couldn’t help but bite your lip at what you saw there. Desire, lust, hunger—no one had ever looked at you like that before. Like they could just devour you and still not have enough of you.

It made you feel powerful.

You grinned and wrapped an arm around his neck, fingers giving his hair a little tug. He hissed and lowered his head so that he could mouth at your bare shoulder, hands squeezing your ass so hard it nearly hurt. You weren’t sure when you started to get wet—maybe it was the moment you sat on his lap or he decided to play along with your dumb stunt—but you could tell it now. Your panties were sticking to you, your skin was on fire and it was becoming difficult to think straight. Honestly however you didn’t want to think at all, especially not if it meant not being in Ten’s orbit.

“Ten,” you whispered into the skin under his jaw.

He hummed, the sound vibrating through your body. You plastered your hand to his chest and pulled it down, nails catching on the thin material of his shirt until they were brushing along the zipper on his jeans. You gave him a quick squeeze—he was hard and straining—and he cursed loudly. Between one second and the next he was dragging you down a dimly light hallway, past kissing couples and one guy passed out drunk in the doorway of someone’s room. He swung you both into the first vacant room he came to; a lavish bathroom at the very back of the house. The door was closed with a swift thump and the lock clicked shut.

You licked your lips as he crowded you back into the counter, looking down at you with a tiny smirk. That part of your brain that yammered on about bad decisions was surprisingly quiet, so you figured it was beyond okay to pull him down for a kiss. As with most of the stuff he did, Ten was a damn good kisser. His mouth was soft and warm, his tongue playful and coaxing. He kissed you like he’d been waiting to kiss you for a long time. Until it grew deep and sensual. Until you were both panting with the need for air but neither wanting to let go of the moment.

With a gasp you tilted backwards a bit, your knees suddenly weak. “Fuck me,” you said absently.

“Can I?” Ten asked, chest heaving. “Can I fuck you?”

“God yes,” you replied, already pulling your dress up until it hitched around your waist.

Ten hooked his thumbs onto the band of your pink panties and slid them down your legs, laying them next to the sink. He looked you over with that same eye he used for his art but you could tell he liked what he saw. You grabbed his hand and brought it between your legs, spreading them wider for him. Two of his fingers slipped inside of you without any resistance to find you damp and aching, already so hot for him. He started a lazy rhythm—in and out, in and out—like he was in no hurry at all. Like he wasn’t driving you crazy all the way down to the tips of your toes.

He kept his eyes locked onto yours as he touched you, lips slightly parted like he couldn’t believe this was happening. That rang true for both of you. Never in your wildest dreams did you think you’d ever really be friends with Ten, let alone about to hook up with him. It was like you’d stumbled into some alternate universe.

Bringing his free hand up to your cheek, he smoothed his thumb across your lips, pressing lightly until you let him in. You sucked his thumb into your mouth and gave it a little nip, smiling when he smirked. When he deemed it wet enough, he pressed it to your clit and you moaned, your hips stuttering upward with a will of their own. He began a firm massage, working your clit this way and that, fingers still thrusting in their maddening motion. Of course he’d be great with his hands. Of course he’d be able to play your body like a finely tuned instrument.

Pressure started to build low in your stomach. “I—I’m…”

“Turn around.” Ten took a step back and made a show of sucking his fingers into his mouth, tongue darting out to lick between them like he wanted to savor every drop.

You whimpered but did as he requested, your eyes finding his in the wide silver mirror. You watched as he unzipped his pants and pushed them along with his dark colored briefs down to the floor. You hadn’t seen him pull out a condom but he had one; ripping open the packaging with his perfectly straight teeth before rolling it onto his hard cock. It was a delicious looking thing you had to admit, long and thick with a slight curve. If you’d had the time you would have gladly went to your knees for him.

A low breath shuddered out of Ten’s lungs as he pushed inside of you, his hands gripping your waist so strongly you were bound to have a few bruises later. “Fuck, you’re tight.”

It had been a while since Adam and nobody after him until now.

When he assumed you’d adjusted to the size of him, he pulled nearly out before driving back inside of you. You moaned and pushed back to meet his thrusts, feeling the pleasure shattering through you. Your breasts bounced as he moved and he reached a hand forward, tugging down the top of your dress so that he could cup one. He rolled your nipple between his fingers and pinched, bending over you so that he could bite down onto the tender skin of your shoulder. The motion sent him even deeper and you both groaned at the feeling.

“Te—Ten,” you stammered, losing your train of thought when he rolled his hips liked he did on the dance floor. “Oh fuck! Fuck!”

The picture you made in the mirror was a very erotic one; you could see every single expression on Ten’s handsome face. The utter enjoyment he was obviously finding in fucking you was written all over it; there was nowhere for it to hide. His head was tipped back, eyes fluttering closed only to pop back open so that he could watch himself shove into you over and over again. He had you up on your tip toes, nose just an inch from the mirror itself. He was always sexy but tonight that word took on a whole new meaning.

All you could do was try to give as good as you got.

You slapped a hand onto the sink to steady yourself and clenched around him, reveling in the low whine that escaped his throat. It kinda sounded like your name.

And then he was pulling all the way out, dick bouncing as he stumbled backwards. You blinked in confusion. “Wh--what’s wrong?”

Ten ran his fingers through his hair. “C’mon. I want you to ride me.”

He sat down on the closed toilet seat lid and you straddled him without a second thought, sinking down onto his dick with a full body shudder. With your dress around your waist and your breasts jiggling in his face as you bounced up and down on his cock, he traced his tongue around your nipple before lightly biting down. You tangled your fingers in his hair and panted out his name, letting out a squeak when his palm connected with your ass for a hard slap. Planting his feet on the floor, he leaned you backwards a bit as he drove into you repeatedly, eyes watching how well your pussy took him.

“You’re beautiful,” he murmured against your collarbone. “Gorgeous—you feel so good.” He bit you again, this time on the side of your neck. “So good.”

With one hand on his shoulder to brace yourself, you rose up and let yourself come down hard over and over again, feeling him pound so deep it was almost criminal. Had the music not been so loud you knew exactly what you would have heard; the sound of skin hitting skin as Ten fucked you like he owned you. Just for tonight, maybe he did.

You weren’t sure how long it went on but when you came it still managed to take you by surprise. Your body lit up like a Christmas tree from the inside out and you cried out Ten’s name, clenching around him, your nails digging into his shoulder blades. He muttered a drawn out fuuuuck and pinched your clit with this thumb and forefinger, making you jerk so hard you nearly tumbled off his lap.

“Ah! Ten!” You shouted as he kept it up. “I—no—oh god—”

Your pussy tightened around him again and he shivered, thrusts growing erratic as he came with a grunt. You trembled through a second orgasm almost in disbelief—usually the only thing that could get you off twice in a row was hidden under your bed in a shoe box.

Seconds later you flopped against him, attempting to catch your breath. He was still rolling his hips just a tiny bit, making all the too sensitive areas ping.

“Whoa,” he said breathlessly, wrapping both arms around your waist. “That was…”

You chuckled softly. “Yeah…” Chancing a look at him, you admired the way strands of his dark hair stuck to his sweaty forehead. He was glistening, shirt sticking to his chest. He smelled like hints of your perfume and you smelled like hints of his cologne. It was all so intimate.

Reluctantly you sat back and gazed at him, wondering if things were about to get awkward. But Ten just smiled and ducked his head a little, a barely there blush creeping up into his already flushed cheeks. It was so adorable you couldn’t have resisted kissing him if you tried. From the way he melted into you, he’d had the same idea.

After a few minutes of just enjoying the feel of his lips against yours, you forced yourself up off of him. Your legs shook; you had to grab the counter to keep from tripping in your heels. You could already tell you’d still feel him tomorrow and the thought made you kinda dizzy, but in a good way. Blinking at your reflection—your hair was a dark mess—you knew there was no way you’d be able to hide the love bites that adorned your skin. They stood out stark red and purple like a bruise.

Ten remained slouched on the toilet for a couple of moments before removing the condom and tossing it into the trash. He dabbed at his dick with a handful of toilet paper, and then pulled up his underwear and jeans. “So…can I ask you something?”

You fixed your dress. “Sure.”

“Who was that guy?” he inquired with a grin. “The one you obviously wanted to get away from.”

Oh shit you’d forgotten all about Adam! “Oh he—he’s my dumb ex. He jumped stupid at me and I—I wanted to show him that he’s an idiot. That I’m totally over him. I—I’m sorry for getting you involved.”

He laughed as he patted down his hair. “No complaints from my end. I think he got the message though.” Reaching behind you he handed you your panties. “Don’t wanna forget these.”

It was ridiculous to be embarrassed considering what you’d both just done, but you couldn’t help it. You took them from him and pulled them on, keeping your eyes on the ground. “Thanks… Look Ten—”

“I’m hungry,” he said interrupting you. “Have you ever had grilled dried pollack?”

“Um yeah once I think,” you replied uncertainly. “It was pretty tasty.”

Ten motioned behind him. “I know a place that makes it if you wanted to go. And…maybe afterwards we could just hang out. Talk.”

That sounded amazing. “I’d love to. But…”

He picked up on your meaning. “Y/N I sit next to you in all of our art classes. I make conversation with you for no reason. Do you really think I of all people forget my brushes? Honestly I’ve wanted to ask you out for a while but you’ve always seemed…disinterested.”

You were dumbstruck by his admission. “Me?! That’s just my face! You’re the unattainable ingénue or whatever!”

Ten chuckled, folding his arms across his chest. “Oh please the only thing standing between me and being a serious cat dad is having an apartment that allows animals. However, this conversation is pointless. You owe me and I’m collecting…if that’s okay?”

You huffed but couldn’t stop grinning. “It’s perfect.”

The walk from the bathroom to the living room had everyone staring with a few people letting out loud whistles. Adam had disappeared but Amy was there to give you a big thumbs up. You promised to call her later and then let Ten pull you outside into the warm night air, your fingers happily entwined with his.

[nanagoswife]

I Failed Everyone. I Failed You.

(^^these are related to the fic^^)

HAPPY MAY 4TH EVERYONE

In celebration, I decided to write this random idea I had literally just last night (right before I wrote it. I wasn't even planning to write last night 😅) Anyways, I thought we could use some Obi, even if he isn't going through entirely good times. With me, I had to end it on a lighter note so sad Obi doesn't necessarily last the whole time.

Pushing this aside, happy May 4th everyone.

May the force be with you, always.

- - -

Summary: After Order 66, Obi-Wan has to go and deal with Anakin. Taking place after the duel, he comes to you for support but, as the next hours go on, you're the one needing comfort.

W/C: 2.2k

Warnings: Mention of flame boy, mention of mass death, character death, angst, Obi being a sad boy

The threatening shades of red and orange accented by the black, soot covered ground would’ve frightened him in any other situation. Even the locals had an unwelcoming presence as they floated over the molten lava, gathering Maker knows what.

Now, though, he was more focused on a different fear that had come true. The order was destroyed, his friends turned on him, he failed Anakin. Obi-Wan Kenobi had failed one of the people he strove to do only good for.

Instead of his true duty, he had just battled his closest friend. His brother. His son. The one other he cared and watched over not because his master had told him so, but because he felt inclined to. There had been something in Anakin that peaked something inside of him that drew him to Anakin.

What good was he if he failed everyone he ever loved? First, Qui-Gon, then so many others. Even people who had just been there that fought by his side or died to save him. Then there was this current moment. He had failed to see how the war was a fool’s game. The person leading it was really on the enemy side and let his true colours show in a drastic change.

Obi-Wan had failed. He had even failed you. Compared to you, Obi-wan knew so much more about what was truly going on. Had he seen how overly fond the Chancellor was for Anakin, even you were suspicious. Yet, he didn’t act on it soon enough.

Due to this, you were caught up in Anakin’s tirade before it turned into the battle he had endured. You had come with Obi-Wan hoping that you could talk him back. Anakin always did have a strong connection with you. He had told Obi-Wan at a point that he looked to you as a mother figure, a role model.

It almost worked, too. It was almost as if something snapped in Anakin as you tried to step closer. All you wanted to do was embrace him and tell him how it would all be okay even after what happened with Padmé moments before. That’s not how he saw it. So, he had used the force and threw you against the ship, rendering you unconscious.

Being protective of both you and Padmé, Obi-Wan tried a last ditch effort to try and talk Anakin down. Despite being known as the ‘Negotiator’, his negotiating skills greatly lacked compared to yours. He had failed your mission to bring him back to the light.

With everything, it led to him watching as he was burned alive, almost pleading for help. Instead of listening, he turned away, unable to watch.

The image was sure to haunt the rest of his days as he walked back to the platform with Anakin’s lightsaber. Before this had all happened, he was able to check to make sure both you and Padmé were still alive. Thank the stars that you both were. He could only hope the baby was alright.

When it came to you, he was relieved to know that the one person he loved most dearly was alright, considering. You would’ve been the last straw had Anakin killed you.

Even in this time of pain and grief, he couldn’t help but be amused at the thought of how, not only did Anakin see both you and him as parental figures, but the two of you had really been together the whole time. Whether Anakin knew or not, the two of you raised him like your own because both of you knew that you couldn’t actually have a child of your own. So, Anakin played that role.

That was why you were so adamant on trying to talk him out of it. Unlike Obi-Wan, you refused to raise a hand to Anakin. Obi-Wan wouldn’t have either, had he not almost killed you and his own wife who carried his child. It repulsed him.

As he neared the platform, fear filled him at thinking something may have happened while he was gone. Did clone troopers arrive and find you here? He didn’t want to think about it, partially because, at this point, he would just give himself up to it.

Stepping up the platform, intense relief overtook him when he saw you with your back turned to him. You only turned when both R2-D2 and C-3PO had greeted him.

He didn’t need to say a word for you to know what happened. Why else would he be carrying the lightsaber? Although you hated that it happened, you couldn’t blame Obi-Wan at all. His pained expression showed how heavily it weighed on him.

Obi-Wan didn’t stop when the droids met him. Instead, he kept his path to you until he was in your arms. The tears that he had just wiped away now mixed with the ash on his face once again as he buried himself into your neck. One of your hands easily held the back of his head while the other gently rubbed his back.

As you held him, your own tears filled your eyes. You were unable to bring Anakin back. You had lost the closest thing you had to a son to the dark.

“I’m so sorry,” Obi-Wan said, barely coherent through his cries. “I-I failed him. I failed you.” Just his voice wrenched your heart as his pain was so prominent.

His words pained you in a way that they never have before. In your mind, he didn’t fail you or Anakin. You were just as much to blame. As was everything else in and around your lives. That wasn’t what he needed to hear, though.

“Shh, it’s alright,” you said quietly into his ear. To further comfort him, you traced delicate circles in his hair. “You didn’t fail me and you definitely didn’t fail Anakin. There’s no way we could’ve known that this is what was going to happen.”

“But-”

You cut him off, “No,” you said firmly but stayed soft so you could comfort him further. “You taught him well. The rest were his decisions. We couldn’t force his path, Obi.”

Carefully, you moved his head so that you could look him in the eyes, cupping his cheeks with your hands. The usual soft, caring blue was now dimmed with pain and grief. Although that’s how you felt, you tried to remain strong on the outside. He didn’t need how you felt added to his own emotions.

“Come on,” you said gently, “Padmé is inside. We need to get her into medical care.”

Slowly, Obi-Wan nodded and you led him inside by the hand that didn’t carry the lightsaber. When you walked in, you left Obi-Wan by Padmé’s side as you went to pilot the ship off this dreary planet.

-

“Twins?” you exclaimed when you heard the news. You, Yoda, and Obi-Wan all glanced at the other when the medical droid told you this.

“Go. By Senator Amidala’s side, you should be,” Yoda told you when you had looked worriedly at your friend. The fact that she was dying hadn’t quite settled in just yet. Instead of voicing this, you nodded to Master Yoda and quickly made your way to Padmé’s side.

Out of pure instinct, you grabbed her hand.

“Y/N,” she said weakly.

“Shh, save your strength. You’re about to have a couple little ones making themselves known,” you said with a slight chuckle, hoping to lighten the mood. To your relief, she let out her own laugh.

The rest of it was all a blur. Padmé’s tight grip on your hand was merely a reminder that you were still here. It was a reminder that these may be the last few moments you get to spend with her.

At a point, you had looked up to where Obi-Wan was watching from the other side of the glass. Trying to be brave, he offered a small smile in comfort. It did help a bit before your attention was drug back to the situation as the grip on your hand was tightened.

Once both Luke and Leia were born, Obi-Wan joined the room and held Luke as you held Leia.

When you looked down, Padmé was smiling at the two babies that the two of you held. Then it fell. “There’s good in him,” she whispered, breathing deeply. “I know… I know there’s… still…” and she faded.

Obi-Wan looked as desolate as you felt. Other than the two of you, there was no one else. Sure, there was Yoda, but relationships with him weren’t as deep as with everyone you’ve lost today. Now, you and Obi-Wan were left with the children of your closest friends.

-

Later, after your discussion with Yoda and Bail Organa about what would happen with the children, you were watching the twins in the nursery through the glass wall. So many thoughts were running through your mind, the most prominent being what would happen with you and Obi-Wan.

During the meeting, the relationship you had with Obi-Wan no longer needed to be hidden. Even though Yoda already had known for years, he was open to what the two of you had to say. This was all to lead up to the point that the two of you would take Luke to his family on Tatooine and, together, you would watch from a distance.

Your thoughts now were about how the two of you would stay hidden with this duty. You thought about how this all would affect the next days, months, stars, maybe years. Would this plague both of you for the rest of your days? Would this draw you apart? Would it bring the two of you closer? Would you finally start the family the two of you wanted?

“Darling?” Your racing mind was interrupted as you heard the familiar voice. Turning to it, you saw Obi-Wan’s worried gaze. This time, it wasn’t because of everything else that had happened. It was a worry for you. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, quite…” you trailed off as you looked back to the two newborns.

Seeing your gaze, he immediately knew what you were probably thinking. He stepped up to you and pulled you into his embrace as he placed a kiss to the top of your head. What you needed was comfort, and that’s exactly what he was going to do.

“Don’t worry, Darling. This won’t pull us apart, I promise,” he said reassuringly.

As he held you, an idea popped up in his head. It was something he continually thought about, but never was able to do. There was so much that he could finally act on that was once held back due to the code. Now, he could tell you and ask you everything he wanted to for so many years. Especially with this idea now.

“Y/N, darling?” He moved slightly back so that he could look into your eyes. The troubled look that he saw in your eyes earlier was now dimmed down and was replaced with the usual fondness he loved to see. “To prove this, I want to ask you something.”

Confusion suddenly took you over. What could he ask that would prove to you that nothing would happen? That is until he started to sink downwards. He kept going until he was kneeling, looking up at you and held one of your hands in his. The whole time, he didn’t remove his eyes from yours.

“This has been something that I’ve wanted to ask for so long. I haven’t been able to before, but now I can. Y/N, will you marry me?”

Overwhelming happiness threw every thought from everything from the last twenty-four standard hours. It was the first time you truly smiled for days, maybe even weeks. It rendered you speechless as this was a day you thought you’d never get. Eagerly, you nodded your head before pulling him up to kiss him. The first time you would share a kiss without the fear of others catching you.

“I love you, Obi. So much,” you said, resting your forehead against his.

“I love you too.” Obi-Wan lifted a hand to your cheek and traced small circles with his thumb. Although the reasons that made this moment possible were horrible, he basked in this small thing that helped both of you forget. This was well needed for now. “Maybe we could finally start the family we’ve always fantasized about,” he said while bringing his lips to your forehead.

You pulled your head away, but didn’t move away from his hold. “Really?”

“Really. Those dreams can finally be a reality.”

Without any more hesitation, you kissed him once again. There will be much to overcome, but you’ll have each other to work through it. You’ll have the other to comfort the other. Eventually, you’ll have another that will make you want to be better.

Then, you knew that Obi-Wan hadn’t failed you and you hadn’t failed Obi-Wan. Even though you both lost your closest friends, and you may have failed so many, you hadn’t failed each other. And in this blissful moment, that’s all that matters.

@stardancerluv @where-fantasy-meets-reality @jaydenwoo @madmax2003 @hopeladybug

If you want to join a taglist, message me or send in an ask. I'll eventually get something set up, but this is the only couple ways for now 😅

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

Like a fool [Oliver Wood x Reader] - Heloise’s Christmas Calendar - Challenge

December 24 – Like a fool [Oliver Wood x Reader]

Title: Like a fool Pairing: Oliver Wood x Female!Reader   Word count: 4.7k   Published: 24 December, 2020 Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore   Notes: This is part of Heloise’s Christmas Calendar. Summary: You have fancied the Gryffindor quidditch captain so obviously, the whole school knew about it. Of course, Oliver didn’t miss to realise your feelings which you were sure he secretly returned. That was until you overheard a conversation.  Challenge: [x] [x] [x] [x]  I wrote this piece for @lunalovegxxd​ ‘s 12 days of angst event using the below prompt. 

24.12 - “Left under the mistletoe”

This is also my entry to @chudleycanons​ ‘s writing challenge using the below trope and prompt. 

Trope: “Unrequited love” Prompt: “You’re all I ever think about.”

Heloise’s Christmas Calendar Masterlist

Harry Potter Characters Masterlist | Masterlists

If you enjoy my stories, please consider donating and supporting me on Ko-fi. Of course, it’s completely your choice, I will continue updating for free anyway :) Thank you <3

Oliver Wood was once again in detention. He was not supposed to, he was the captain of Gryffindor’s quidditch team, he was regulated and composed, a born leader. He was always on top of things, ready with an answer even in the most unexpected situations.

Except when it came to you.

The boy knew of your crush on him, you have been chasing him for months relentlessly, but he just couldn’t figure you out. Why him, why then and certainly why you always got him in trouble. He didn’t want to think of you, he wanted you to be the last person to think of, but your continuous presence around him made you become the main focus of his attention and it riled him up. An infuriating feeling bubbled deep inside him each time you occupied his thoughts.

You didn’t cause trouble on purpose though, it just seemed to happen, but you used the opportunity wisely, to spend time with Oliver even if it was in detention. Whilst it annoyed him, you enjoyed each and every moment you could spend with him.

He groaned as he wrote down a part of the school policy for the 53rd times. He was angry about being in detention again, especially because of the scolding he received from McGonagall. The professor was rather unhappy that the captain of her house’s quidditch team once again found himself in trouble and she wasn’t afraid of telling the boy off in front of the whole school, embarrassing him.

“Are you done?” You asked, abruptly pulling Oliver out of his thoughts.

“Would you mind not talking to me?” He asked with gritted teeth.

“It’s your fault that we are here this time.” You shrugged and put your legs up on the table as you leaned back against the chair, your skirt sliding up on your thighs. His head shot up, his eyes ready to murder you or at least to try, before they wandered to the exposed skin on your legs. You could just see the slight flicker of fire in his eyes and no one could convince you that the boy didn’t feel something for you.

Oliver visibly shook his head, his eyes becoming firm again. “And how is this my fault?” He asked with a warning tone.

“If you gave into my advances before, we wouldn’t be here now. I wouldn’t have to chase after you, I wouldn’t have to keep telling you that I fancied you, and you wouldn’t get so pissed off about it that you break McGonagall’s window.” You wiggled your brows with a playful smirk.

“It was not my fault.” He raised his voice. “I’m your captain, you should listen to me, but you are the only person who always goes against me. You are driving me insane. If you did what I told you to do, things wouldn’t have spiralled out of control.” He huffed.

“As I said, if you accepted my date offer, none of the detentions would have happened.” You replied nonchalantly.

“Honestly, can’t you just stop? I have never fancied you, nor will I ever fancy you.” He spoke firmly, which made you chuckle. You stood up from your spot and walked in front of his table, bending over it, leaning on his notes with your forearm, your eyes lining up with him.

You could clearly see his adam’s apple nervously moving, his breath hitching for a second from the proximity you created. “How long are you going to keep lying to yourself?” You raised a brow questioningly. “I would have given up long ago if I didn’t see the changes in you. Back when I first confessed, you just ignored me, but it’s not the case anymore. I rile you up so easily, you can’t get me out of your head. Whenever I’m around you, it makes you nervous and when I touch you- I can see the goosebumps appear on your skin.” You whispered against his lips as you leaned forward, caressing his forearm, your own heart speeding up as you could feel him in your grasp already. His eyes wandered to your lips, watching as you bit on your lower lip.

But he quickly composed himself. “I don’t know what you are talking about.” He spoke firmly, but he couldn’t fool you. You have studied each and every expression and little movement, his whole body language eagerly.

“We will see about that.” You replied with a cheeky smirk as you leaned back and walked to your table. You had 3 more weeks before Christmas break to get the boy and you were determined to do so.

*

Days passed by and Oliver was just exhausted from your constant nagging. Or so he kept saying. But you knew he didn’t mind it as much as he tried to tell others. You thought maybe he was just embarrassed that a girl was chasing after him, instead of letting him do the hunting. You thought maybe he was just inexperienced with girls, since you haven’t heard much about his love-life. You had many thoughts on why he didn’t want to give in to your advances, but him not having feelings for you was not one of them.

He sat in the Gryffindor common room with Fred and George on each side of his as they got lost in their conversation. You sat in an armchair in a corner with your friends, watching Oliver’s wide back and broad shoulders under the uniform. You were ignoring your friend’s chattering, the boy stole your attention without his knowledge. Or so you thought.

His ears started growing redder, his cheeks taking on the same colour. He turned around, his eyes meeting yours as you offered him a playful grin. He rolled his eyes and turned away, his ears taking on an even darker shade. He was way too obviously affected by you for someone who was supposed to hate you which made your confidence grow.

You stood up from your chair and walked behind the couch the boy was seated on, halting right behind Oliver. Fred and George realised your presence, but as you placed your index finger in front of your lips to quiet them, they decided to play along. They continued the conversation with a cocky smirk across their face.

“You seem to be blushing, mate.” Fred chuckled loudly, which earned a slap on the back of his head from Oliver.

“Leave me alone with your nonsense. Why on earth would I be blushing?” He huffed in an annoyed tone.

“Well, maybe because a certain girl forgot her eyes on you?” He grinned playfully. You were glad that Fred brought you up in their conversation, letting you listen in on Oliver’s thoughts.

“And why would I care about that?” Oliver asked with a nonchalant shrug, his tone clearly bored of the subject matter.

“Maybe you are catching feelings?” George quipped in, wriggling his brows. “I mean, no one would blame you. Y/n is certainly a catch.” He nudged Oliver’s shoulder.

“Are you having a laugh?” He scoffed, his scottish accent growing thicker in frustration. “I can’t stand that woman. She is making my life miserable. I have never seen anyone being so stubborn. She is infuriating and if she wasn’t a woman, I would have probably hexed her already.” He hissed through his gritted teeth. “I don’t just have to deal with her when we have quidditch practice, no, she follows me like a pathetic little puppy.” He spit in anger. You could always ignore his harsh glares, his angered tone, his irritated, hurtful comments. You always thought he was being cold because he felt awkward around you, but hearing him talk about you with so much hatred opened your eyes. You felt your throat close up, your eyes stinging from the unshed tears. You felt like he was holding onto your heart and deliberately squeezed it to cause you pain.

“Wait-” George wanted to cut him off, but Oliver didn’t let him.

“No! I understand she likes me, but what she is doing is not normal. Borderline stalker, if you ask me. She doesn’t care about my feelings, she is simply trying to force herself onto me without my permission. She doesn’t care about privacy, she is basically following me around. And most of all, it doesn't matter how many times I tell her to leave me alone, I can’t get rid of her. She is like a leech.” He groaned, agitation clear in his voice.

Your chest felt as if a heavy weight fell on it, your lungs unable to expand, your throat closed off the air it craved so badly. You felt your eyes fill up, tears glistening in them. You watched from the side as Fred looked up at you with an apologetic look. You held back the tears and nodded to the boy, silently telling him that you were just fine, but you couldn’t stay any longer. You turned on your heels and rushed up the stairs, straight to your room.

“That was harsh, mate.” Fred scolded the boy, but you couldn’t hear. You loudly shut the door behind you and fell on top of your bed, tears sliding down your face, being swallowed by your duvet.

You always thought he was just playing hard to get. You weren’t stupid, you saw the changes in him, you saw the way he blushed, the way you caught him staring at you when noone else was looking, but after all that you heard, you could only think of how pathetic you were.

You groaned in frustration, rubbing your eyes to get rid of the never-ending tears. You were disgusted of yourself, of the time you spent chasing him. Going after him for months, feeling as if you have made progress, openly showing your interest in him made you feel like a fool and now everyone knew how pathetic your crush on Oliver Wood was.

You hated yourself!

You hated him!

*

You have cried for days, your eyes were bloodshot, your cheeks swollen. You weren’t just upset about your situation, you have walked around like a bomb ready to explode, picking fights with anyone who got in your way. But by the end of the week you were just tired. Whilst Oliver’s words still hurt, you understood getting him in trouble wasn’t the best option to spend time with him, and you were smart enough to know that people didn’t always like those who they were liked by. You knew now that Oliver didn’t like you, you understood, but it was certainly not easy to see him all the time whilst trying to get over him.

You spent your time watching the boy from a distance, hurting yourself even more, but even if you tried harder, you just couldn’t get yourself to look away. Sometimes you caught his eyes as he turned to you, but you quickly turned away, pretending to focus on something very important in the distance. You didn’t want to feel like a fool, who even after being hated so openly, still ran after her crush.

You started off each day with a pep talk, preparing yourself for his presence. You couldn’t avoid him, you had classes together, you played in the same quidditch team, you were part of the same Hogwarts house, living in the very same Gryffindor tower.

Days passed painfully slowly as you kept forcing your gaze away from him, trying to concentrate on anything but his chiselled jawline, broad shoulders and cheeky grin across his face. It was a hard task, but you didn’t want to feel pathetic anymore, you had to work on getting over him and the best way to do it was to get your brain busy with anything, but him.

You walked towards your Transfiguration class, when a hand landed on your shoulder, stopping your steps. You turned around, your brows running high, your lips parting in surprise.

“Can I talk to you?” Oliver asked as he let go of your shoulder. You frowned at the boy, knowing how happy he must be to get rid of you. Though you were happy to see him, it also hurt in the worst possible way. Was he ready to laugh at you? He was finally free of you, he had no business with you.

“What for? If it’s about quidditch, you can talk to me at practice.” You spoke firmly. You didn’t mean to be rude, you knew people didn’t choose who they liked and Oliver was no exception. He couldn’t force himself to like you, nor could you force him to. Though you weren’t kind to him, the stern stance you took on was to protect your composed self.

“I’m sorry.” He breathed, his head falling forward, his gaze fixed on the ground. You frowned at the boy, unable to understand his apology.

“What are you sorry for?” You asked in confusion.

“You have been avoiding me and I didn’t understand why. George finally told me that you overheard what I said.” He explained.

You scoffed at his reply, your eyes wandering around the corridor, all sorts of angry thoughts running around in your head. Of course, now he was sorry, you thought. “Are you sorry because I heard what you said or because you said it?” You raised a questioning brow, a sceptical look spread across your face.

“Both.” He finally lifted his head to connect his deep brown eyes with yours. “I’m sorry that you heard what I said, but I shouldn’t have said it in the first place.” You knew he meant it, he was being genuine. You knew him way too well to know when he was lying and when he was telling the truth. “It was insensitive of me and honestly I didn’t mean it. I don’t want to look for excuses, but I was pissed off and the words just came out of my mouth. I really am very sorry.” It was the first time that he was standing in front of you without a hurtful word to say or an annoyed expression across his handsome face. For the first time you stood in front of him without confessing your love for him and chasing after the boy who never wanted you.

You took a deep breath, processing his words. “Your words hurt, you know?” You asked, looking into his eyes. He nodded in confirmation with an apologetic look across his face. “I guess I didn’t handle this whole situation well either. I was annoyingly stubborn.” A tiny smile was hiding in the corner of your lips as you reached for his hand to shake it. “I guess we are even. Both of us did some stupid things.” He looked down at your hand, before a smile appeared across his face and happily accepted your gesture. “I have class now, but I will see you at practice.” You said and without a second thought you left Oliver behind, heading to your class.

You didn’t plan on communicating with him more nor did you want to become friends with him, you were nowhere near getting over him. But you were glad he felt sorry and you were certainly happy that in the end, he didn’t hate you after all.

*

You were seated on your broom at the quidditch pitch, waiting for instructions from Oliver. To avoid any unnecessary conflicts, you tried to interact with him less in classes and at practice. Whilst you weren’t hated by him, you knew you had to keep him at arm’s length to be able to get over him.

You put a lock on your lips and when you were told to do something, you nodded diligently and did it. From a loud and opinionated person, you have become a ghost of yourself. You haven’t rebelled anymore nor did you get into arguments with the captain. It was just quiet and peaceful. Too peaceful to those around you who knew you well.

As practice finally finished, you landed on the quidditch pitch and hurried to the changing room.

“Y/n!” You heard Angelina from behind. You halted, waiting for her to arrive next to you, before you both headed to the changing room. “Are you okay?” She asked with a worried look.

“Of course.” You smiled, trying to shoo her worries away.

“You haven’t really been yourself recently.” She said and you didn’t need to ask to understand what she actually meant. Whilst it hurt you to distance yourself from Oliver, you didn’t want to seem any more pathetic than they already thought you were.

“I’m fine, Angie.” You placed a hand on her shoulder squeezing it reassuringly. Although the movement was more to give yourself some strength, to overcome the following 2 weeks before the break.

The castle was already decorated for Christmas, floating candles flying around the corridors, fake snow falling from the ceiling before they disappeared abruptly. Tiny Christmas trees decorated every corridor, a gigantic tree standing proudly at the Great hall in all its glory.

As you finished dressing and headed out of the changing room Angie called after you to wait for her. You looked back to give her a nod, completely missing the person standing in front of you as you accidentally walked into his back.

“Sorry.” You apologised, rubbing your forehead as Oliver turned around and shook his head. You wanted to move past him to leave, but your legs froze on the spot. Your eyes studied his handsome features eagerly. It’s been days since you actually looked at the boy, without trying to forget how good looking he was. His brown eyes scanned your face, before connecting them to yours. It’s been a while since you looked into each other’s eyes, let alone kept eye contact. You tried to force away the little scream in your head that was trying to convince you that he looked at you differently, that his eyes were warm and welcoming, not cold, hateful or apologetic anymore.

You heard a loud chuckle and as you turned your head you saw Fred pointing above you with a comical look. You lifted your head to see a mistletoe appear above you from the ceiling, leaving you gaping. Your eyes wandered back to Oliver who was still looking at the plant above him. You watched as his jaw tightened, the meaning of the mistletoe hitting him hard.

Whilst the randomly appearing mistletoes weren’t the professor’s inventions, nor were they approved by them, cunning students found a way around the rules and charmed the little buggers to appear in the most unexpected times.

Oliver’s eyes finally met yours, his lips parted in surprise as he realised what he was supposed to do. You prayed for whoever was up there to give you a chance. Just maybe a kiss on the cheek or even on the back of your hand, wrongfully getting your own hopes up.

But you were wrong.

The boy took a last look at you, his eyes holding an unknown expression as he turned on his heels and hurried out of the changing room with his steps disappearing faster than you have ever heard. You couldn’t deny the pain you felt, the suffocating feeling in your throat, your tears screaming to be able to escape. You cleared your throat and left the room, feeling the uncomfortable gazes on you. You couldn’t wait for Angelina, you needed to disappear. Once again you were the pathetic party, who longed after the boy who didn’t want you.

You just wanted the Christmas break to arrive already, you didn’t want to see him every single day anymore.

*

The last week before the holidays was going even slower, forcing you to be a shadow of your usually loud and confident self. You didn’t have energy to act as if you weren’t hurting. Teenage love is cruel, you feel it hundred times stronger and you don’t know how to cope with it. That was exactly how you felt. Unable to cope and hurting each time you caught sight of him.

You sat on one of the couches in the Gryffindor common room, the place empty and silent, two words you could hardly ever say about your part of Hogwarts. You watched the clock above the fireplace ticking. It was 3am, you were supposed to be asleep already, but you just couldn’t keep your eyes closed, your messy thoughts occupying your brain, insomnia laughing at you in the face.

You heard footsteps approaching, but you didn’t look up. You weren’t a prefect, you couldn’t care less about who walked around the castle at such late hours. You felt the couch sunk in beside you, but you didn’t move to look up at the arrival, nor did you care to know who it was. You were comfortable in the silence, your thoughts being your only friend.

“I’m sorry.” You heard his hoarse voice. You thought you heard it wrong, your head whipped around to look at him in shock as you realised his familiar voice.

“What are you doing here?” You asked, feeling slightly awkward after your last encounter in the changing room.

“I couldn’t sleep.” He shook his head, his eyes fixed on the fireplace. “I’m sorry.” He repeated himself again.

“For what this time?” You asked curiously. “You seem to enjoy apologising to me.” You chuckled lightly, making him smile as well, trying to lighten the mood.

“I don’t enjoy it to be honest. I wish I didn’t have to apologise.” He heaved a deep sigh. “I didn’t want to hurt you when I left you under the mistletoe. It’s just-“ you didn’t let him finish it, you cut straight into his sentence.

“Wait, wait, please don’t apologise for that. It’s nothing. I’m sure it was just Fred and George’s stupid prank and you don’t have to apologise for something like this. Look, it’s not like you cursed me or started a fight with me for no particular reason. It was just a silly little thing, you really shouldn’t feel the need to be sorry at all.” You kept rambling, your words leaving your lips without control, your mind in overdrive as you tried to feel less embarrassed but forced yourself into an even more awkward situation.

“Have you finished?” He asked with a raised brow and a slight smirk across his face.

“Yeah.” You breathed as you closed your eyes momentarily, heaving a deep sigh, planning to dig yourself a six feet deep hole to hide in until you graduated.

“I am apologising because I wanted to kiss you.” He confessed. Your eyes widened in surprise as you watched his profile, his jaw tightening in the dim light as he let out a sigh. “I can’t tell you what it is, I don’t exactly know how I feel, but I know I wanted to kiss you under that stupid mistletoe.” He turned to you finally, his brown eyes looking right into your soul, or that’s how you felt. You weren’t sure how to react. It made you happy that he wanted to kiss you, but he didn’t in the end. It made you feel warm and giddy that he felt something for you, but in the end, he wasn’t sure what. You didn’t know how to react to someone who didn’t know his own feelings.

“I am confusing you, aren’t I?” He asked with a small smile, which earned him a single nod from you. “I’m confusing myself too.” He scoffed as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. You didn’t dare to talk, fearing to ruin the moment, afraid of making a fool out of yourself.

Silence fell on the two of you, your heartbeat loud enough for you to hear it in your own ears. Oliver never made you nervous, it was you who chased after him all along, but for the first time, you felt as though your heart wanted to jump out of your throat, your lips dried out in nervousness and in your awkward state you didn’t even know where to put your hands.

You had a silly idea, one that you were scared to voice, so you decided to push it in the back of your mind and instead forced yourself to talk. “What do you feel? I mean, you said you can’t word it, but maybe you could describe it?” You asked as you watched the flames in the fireplace, your throat drying out in your nervous state. You felt his gaze on you, but you didn’t dare to look at him as you waited for him to reply.

“You know, you’re all I ever think about.” You turned towards the boy, your eyes wide in surprise. “At first it was because you annoyed me with your constant love confessions, but since you stopped, I don’t know why, but your face keeps appearing in my head.” He chuckled weakly. “When we are in the same room, I keep looking for your eyes, but recently you haven’t been returning it and it makes me feel heavy.” He scoffed at his own words. “I thought I wanted you to stop hanging around me, but now that you did, it drives me nuts that you are not there.” You wanted to jump up from the couch and throw your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug, but you didn’t dare to move. It felt like you were in a dream and you were scared it would disappear the second you moved. “When we stood under that mistletoe, I really wanted to kiss you, but I was so confused and I just couldn’t do it. Since then I have been having a battle inside me.”

You gulped loudly as your silly idea from earlier returned, but after all you have heard from Oliver, you couldn’t keep it in any longer. “Maybe if you kissed me now, it would help.” You whispered, your eyes leaving him and focusing on the fireplace. You felt his intense gaze on you, but you didn’t dare to turn. You didn’t want to see his face if in case he decided to reject you again.

You felt him shuffle on the couch, soon the material sinking in right beside you. He placed a hand on your cheek, turning you towards him, his eyes studying you curiously. “Did you mean that?” He asked and you nodded in reply, his proximity not letting a word escape your lips. Your breath hitched as you felt him leaning closer, his lips gently grazing yours before connecting your lips.

You wanted to sigh into the kiss, his lips on yours feeling as if they were made to be for you, but the air was stuck in your lungs, fearing he would pull back. It was a slow kiss, both of you experiencing an unknown territory, studying each other’s movements, the sensation the kiss made you feel.

You pulled away for a long-awaited breath. His eyes were closed, but you could read his satisfied, content expression. A small smile spread across your face, feeling both confident and uncertain at the same time. Before you could have even said something or question his feelings, he pulled you back against his lips, kissing you hungrily, his usual confidence catching up with him.

You froze for a moment, but soon you kissed him back as passionately as you could, trying to force all your feelings in that one kiss. You ran your fingers through his short brown hair, scratching his scalp gently, earning a silent moan from him.

As he pulled away, he leaned his forehead against yours, his eyes still closed. You watched his long lashes spread across his cheeks, his heavy breathing tickling your skin. “Did that help?” You whispered, which made him silently chuckle, earning a small smile from you.

“It certainly did.” He replied as he opened his eyes. “I don’t think I ever want to stop kissing you.” He confessed, your smile growing wider as you bit into your bottom lip.

“Noone says you have to.” You giggled as he pulled you back against his lips again, enjoying the feel of your mouth on his.

The night quickly washed away as you laid in each other’s arms on the couch, but you knew with the new day, you are on to a fresh start, a start where your unrequited love isn’t unrequited after all.

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[kpop-cakepops]

Soulmate: Bells (part 1) // JeonghanxFem!Reader

Ummmmm so mayhaps this ended up being WAY LONGER THAN INTENDED AND WILL HAVE A 2ND PART.

Genre: IDK how to explain it other than VERY light angst mixed with fluff.

Warnings: none

Word count: 3,573 🙊

"I'm sorry Jeonghan... I really thought this would work out. I thought that this soulmate thing wasn't going to sway me" Sowon couldn't maintain eye contact with Jeonghan as she spoke.

"What do you mean?" He asked with a trembling voice.

"Jeonghan... I found my soulmate... and as much as I fought it, everything in me gave up..." She said

Soulmates. It seemed that the older he grew the more he hated the term. Soulmates? Who in their right mind would believe that a little sound you heard on your sixteenth birthday would lead you to the person you were meant to be with for the rest of your life?

Sowon, apparently.

Despite having sworn to each other that soulmates would not make them waver, despite swearing to be together no matter what, no matter how hard and bumpy the road got... yet there she was sitting across from him, telling him she had given up on all those promises.

"Are you telling me you cheated on me?" He asked.

Sowon's eyes met the ground, but the more she refused to talk the more it dawned on Jeonghan, she had. She had cheated on him.

"Sowon-"

"I'm sorry! Please, I'm so sorry. It was the last thing I wanted to do but I couldn't stop myself... Jeonghan it's real. I heard it, the sound of glass clinking against glass. It sounds ridiculous because it's such a trivial thing to hear, but the sound made everything feel so clear, it was like my heart just knew and... Jeonghan, I love him. I don't even know him, but there's this- this part of me that I just can't control. I want to! I want to know him" she cried out. Jeonghan felt like all air had been kicked out of him. How was he meant to respond to that? He'd never experienced what Sowon was talking about, he couldn't even bring himself to imagine it... all he knew was that he didn't want to lose her. "I can't do this to you and I can't do it to him either. I'm sorry... we need to break up"

Tears pricked at Jeonghan's eyes as he watched the girl he loved the most stand from her seat and walk away from him.

That was the last time he saw her.

***

"Turns out his soulmate is a guy named Wonwoo... and he's so much prettier than me too! I seriously, cannot believe this is happening to me again... I was convinced I was his soulmate" you held your phone between your ear and your shoulder as you struggled to pull out a book from its place on the bookshelf. It had been a week since you'd tried to convince Mingyu that he was your soulmate, only for him to find his real soulmate a few days after meeting you.

"Maybe you should stop trying to force every pretty person around you to be your soulmate, Mingyu's bell wasn't even like yours, he was waiting to hear a bike bell and you didn't even hear your bell either, and NO someone yelling Taco Bell isn't a bell. Are you nuts?" Your best friend Soonyoung was on the line eating something as he yelled at you. It was a cycle he was both annoyed with and used to, but he understood. After spending most of your life alone, he understood why you were so adamant about finding your soulmate, the person that was meant to be with you for the rest of your life. The person who would rid you of the fear of dying alone and in pain like those who were never able to meet their soulmates because that's how this world worked. No matter how much you tried, sometimes meeting the one person that was meant to love you, was an impossible task.

"Okay so maybe I didn't hear the bell but I heard a bell" you insisted as you tugged harshly at the book finally managing to free it from its spot but dropping it in the process. You scurried quickly to grab it but a pair of dainty hands beat you to it and pushed the book up to you.

"Thank you" you murmured not paying any attention and walking straight past the stranger.

"You're welcome" answered Soonyoung, and it was almost like she could hear his shit-eating grin.

"Shut up, I wasn't-" you were cut off by the sound of a tinkling bell as the door to the small book store swung open, and suddenly, as if by art of magic everything around you seemed to stop. It was like one of those five gum commercials, at least that's the only thing you could compare it to. All your senses were alive and you couldn't help but feel... aware... of what, you didn't know, but you felt aware. You were reverted to your 16th birthday, sitting alone in your large dining room with no one but your nanny and the sound of a hopeful bell ringing in your mind marking you for the future. "Wait... wait Soonyoung, I heard it. That was it. I heard the bell" you said as turned around quickly to find the person that had just handed you your book.

Your best friend groaned on the other side of the line "Oh god... are you being serious right now? Are you seriously doing this again?"

"Shit... Shit shit shit, where is he? I lost him. He was right behind me-" you rushed over to the spot where you'd dropped the book but no one was there anymore. Then it hit you... the door. The door opened and closed only moments after he handed the book to you, he must have walked out. "Oh no... he left!" You dropped your book and rushed out the door, your phone still in hand as a sense of panic started to fill you.

"Soonyoung, I can't find him. It was him and I don't know what he looks like!" you were starting to freak out. How could you miss him like that? You were also confused. Wasn't the sound supposed to be automatic? As soon as the two of you met the sound was supposed to trigger... for the two of you so why wasn't he there? Were you mistaken?

"Wait, Y/N are you being serious right now?"

"Yes! Soonyoung, it was the bell, but I missed him. Oh god, NOW WHAT?!" You asked as you walked down the sidewalk, eyes roaming every single person in sight in case anything... special or magical happened, but it was to no avail. No one seemed to do anything for her.

"Y/N are you sure you're not just-"

You cut your best friend off in annoyance. "I'll call you back later, I need to find this guy" you grumbled quickly hanging up the call after. You really couldn't find him, he had been in front of you just moments before but he'd disappeared almost as he'd come. A second wave of panic passed you as you looked around helplessly. Tears were pricking at your eyes because despite being childish and immature most of the time, the feeling you got when hearing that bell was nothing like anything you'd felt before... and yet... your soulmate didn't look for you. Your soulmate should have heard the bell too, right? So where was he?

Slowly your biggest fear started materializing before you in the shape of nothingness, in the shape of loneliness. Your soulmate didn't seem to want you or at least didn't seem to care enough to come back and find you.

Except, he had found you. Your very soulmate was staring at you from the bookstore's window with a gaze of confusion, a part of him hated that your sole existence meant he couldn't choose love for himself, that because of the woman on the other side of the glass he could no longer be with the person he chose. That he was predestined to love someone he knew nothing about... yet the other half of him felt an unexplainable urge to walk up to you and hug you like he'd missed you his whole life. Of walking up to you and wiping away the tears you were earnestly trying to hide as you stared at every single person that walked by.

That's why Jeonghan found himself avoiding the bookstore like the plague after that day. He would walk by on occasion wondering if it'd be okay to walk in, but then he'd see you sitting outside the shop waiting for something to happen, and he'd turn right back around. Eventually, you stopped showing up, and although he'd never stopped to talk to you, Jeonghan subconsciously wondered where you'd gone and if you were okay.

After a month of not going, Jeonghan finally dropped by the bookstore when Joshua called him to help him with a new shipment. His friend had grown increasingly curious as to why Jeonghan had been avoiding the store when it seemed the store had been his safe haven since his heart-wrenching breakup.

"Mind telling me what you've been up to lately?" Asked Joshua when the last customer was out the door.

"Studying for exams" Jeonghan lied as he moved the stack of books to be donated into a box.

"Alone?" Asked Joshua curiously.

"Yes alone, who else would I study with?" Asked Jeonghan as he moved his floppy red hair out of his face.

"Oh... alright" Joshua answered.

Unable to hold it in, Jeonghan's best friend spoke again. "I found my soulmate," he said. Joshua knew it was a touchy topic for Jeonghan, but he was his best friend and it was important for him that Jeonghan know.

The red-haired man cleared his throat uncomfortably, he had found his too, but that was not something he necessarily felt like sharing with the world. He had tried convincing himself he was keeping it a secret to show that he was in control of his own mind and emotions, but in reality, he was scared and embarrassed. Scared that he'd be proven wrong about you, that you'd be everything he wanted and dreamed of, and embarrassed that due to his own capriciousness he was hurting you.

"Okay" was all that Jeonghan could muster at the news.

"I want you to meet her," said Joshua as he put unsold books into the same box Jeonghan had been filling.

This caused Jeonghan to pause for a moment. Joshua wanted him to meet his soulmate, "what for?"

Joshua sighed and stood up straight, his big eyes looking straight at his friend. "Because she's important to me and you are my best friend. I want you both to get to know each other."

Unable to say no to his best friend, Jeonghan nodded his head, "okay."

The lack of drive in his usually playful best friend worried Joshua and it pained him to know that if he even tried to bring the worries up, Jeonghan would simply disappear for a few more weeks again. "I invited her out for dinner, her friend will be coming too, so you don't have to worry about third-wheeling"

With a thin forced smile, Jeonghan stood and dusted his hands in front of himself. "Okay"

By the time they finished packing up the boxes, Jeonghan was ushered out of the store. He watched as his friend turned the "open" sign over and locked the door. Subconsciously, Jeonghan's eyes stopped on the silver bell hanging from the door. Memories of the way you had looked on that day, panicked and frantic as you searched the area for him. It made him wonder yet again, what you were up to and if everything was okay with you.

The wait at the restaurant wasn't long. It only took about 5 minutes for a girl to walk in with a bright smile on her face, one that was instantly matched by Joshua's the moment he lay eyes on her. "Hey" she greeted happily.

Jeonghan was too busy watching the two interact to even notice the way you'd followed Joshua's soulmate into the restaurant like a dejected little shadow. The truth was, you hadn't exactly planned on being there. You had been spending the last few weeks feeling sorry for yourself and ignoring your two best friends, for some reason you had started to get comfortable with that way of life, that is until In-na came barging into your home squealing about her soulmate... you couldn't exactly say no to her invitation, and free dinner wasn't exactly a bad idea.

And then you sat down.

You didn't notice him at first. When In-na had told you you'd be meeting her soulmate, you hadn't been thrilled, it almost felt like a slap to the face, but you knew your friend better than to believe her to be evil like that. You knew she had good intentions in mind when she told you her soulmate would be inviting his best friend so you wouldn't feel too much like a third-wheel. It was rude of you, for sure, but since the moment you sat you'd been on your phone texting Soonyoung about how much you hated being there, and trying to convince him to pick you up, but Soonyoung was ignoring you for ignoring him.

"This is my best friend, Y/N" you heard In-na introduce you and for the first time since you'd arrived, you were forced to face the two guys in front of you.

And then you wished you hadn't.

It was him. Everything in your being was SCREAMING that it was him. Every fiber in you knew that the man with hair dyed a deep red, that was sitting across from you at that very moment was him. But something was wrong with him. His big droopy eyes looked like a flashlight that had run out battery, all signs of light were gone and something in you stirred. Was it sadness? Worry? You couldn't pinpoint it.

Then there was Jeonghan, who, unbeknownst to you, saw almost a reflection of himself when he saw you. The burnt-out gaze and the bags under your eyes, except he was the cause for your sadness and then something in him stirred, but unlike you, he knew exactly what it was.

Guilt.

Jeonghan was about to excuse himself to leave but you beat him to it by painting a smile on your face, "nice to meet you guys"

You were mad. Angry. Fuming. He was pretending to not know you. He had pretended from the start because you could tell, even if you didn't want to, you could read him like a book because, despite him not wanting it, you two were entwined for life. Quite literally biologically wired to be together, because that's how society worked, that's how it had worked for centuries.

"Nice to meet you too" greeted Joshua softly, but his eyes we not set on you, just like In-Na's weren't. They were soulmates, after all, they were blind to the world around them... and it was simply disappointing how unlike them you and Jeonghan were.

Dinner was long, the energy emanating from you was directly absorbed by the man sitting across from you. He was uncomfortable, the way you were acting just didn't seem to sit well with him. From the way you picked at your food without taking a single bite, to the way you looked like you would rather be anywhere but where you sat, he felt... worried?

"Who wants ice cream?" Asked In-na and Joshua who, contrary to the 2 extras sitting beside them, were having the time of their lives. You wanted so badly to say you didn't want ice cream, to tell her to take you home, but the light blush that spread across your friend's cheeks and the almost sparkly gaze Joshua stared at her with, didn't allow you to make such a request. So instead you remained silent, and to no one's surprise so did Jeonghan.

"I know a great place, I'll go pay for the food, and then I'll drive us there," Joshua announced.

With that, he walked in direction of the front counter, leaving behind the love of his life and the two dysfunctional soulmates that refused to so much as look at each other. "Isn't he amazing? Isn't he, Y/N?" In-na gushed.

You smiled genuinely, if anything good had come out of that dinner it was the amount of joy it brought your best friend. "He's awesome, In-na. You two really are made for one another"

She clasped your hand in hers and grinned softly. "Thank you for coming. I promise we'll find your soulmate soon" she mentioned mindlessly. It was beyond frustrating to see Jeonghan lift his head from the corner of your eyes, his expression almost clueless.

"I'm going to go outside, I need to make a call real quick, yeah?"

In-na nodded, but you doubted she even heard what you said as her eyes were trained on the man paying at the front counter. With a sigh, you stepped out of your seat and took yourself out of the restaurant. The fresh air outside and the fact that you were no longer around Jeonghan seemed to decompress your lungs.

As if on autopilot, your fingers tapped at the screen of your phone calling Soonyoung.

"I don't know if you realize this, but I'm ignoring you" the man on the other end snapped as he answered the phone.

Hearing his voice made your heart twist in relief because despite being a dumb jerk sometimes, Soonyoung was your best friend. He was your comfort and that's precisely what you needed: comfort. "Soonyoung..." you hadn't noticed you were on the verge of tears until you spoke his name.

All signs of pettiness were gone from his voice as he answered, "y/n. Are you crying?"

"Listen, I get that you're upset with me, but I really, really, need you to come pick me up" you begged, forcing yourself to swallow the lump in your throat. "I promise you can go right back to ignoring me once you drop me off home"

"Where are you? I'll be there in 5 minutes."

"I'll send you the address. Just please come."

You hung up the call, hands wiping at your eyes quickly until a hand reached out before you, the same hand that had handed you a book back then, except this time it was handing you a tissue. You sniffle a bit before snatching it from him and blowing your nose obnoxiously.

Jeonghan didn't say anything as you both stood side by side waiting for Soonyoung to pick you up. He was still feeling guilty, but what exactly was he supposed to say? I'm in love with someone else? No, of course not, because the more he watched you, the more he forgot what Sowon looked and sounded like, and the more he stood in your proximity feeling all types of emotions... the more he forgot what 'loving' Sowon had ever felt like. Was he supposed to tell you that he hated you for something that was entirely out of your, his, and even Sowon's control when all he could focus on was how nice your hair smelled and how good the warmth of your body felt even when he wasn't touching you?

Exactly 5 minutes went by in loud silence until a car drove up to the curve. You pushed yourself off the wall you'd been leaning on and turned to look at your sullen soulmate, who had instinctively followed suit stepping away from the wall in alarm. You huffed in frustration as you watched him. You wanted to tell him off so badly, and yet his big eyes were now telling you he was just as confused as you about all the sudden feelings you were both feeling, you were so flustered you ended up walking away. Then you thought about it twice and turned right back around and stopped right before Jeonghan, your hand grabbing his causing his eyes to meet yours directly for the first time that night. "You, if you run away again and pretend to not know me, I will find you and... I don't know what I'll do yet, but Joshua will tell me where you are. I will make sure of it." you warned him, "bye." The bite in your words made him wince.

He wanted to answer and maybe even apologize but you didn't give him a chance to as you walked up to the car that was waiting for you across the street. A man within the car was glaring at him through squinted eyes, surely he was trying to intimidate Jeonghan, but all Soonyoung really did was make Jeonghan uncomfortable.

"Stop staring at him and drive" you grumbled bringing your friend back to reality.

At that moment both In-na and Joshua stepped out of the restaurant with bright smiles. "Where's Y/N?" asked In-na, big eyes searching the area for you.

Jeonghan didn't find it in him to answer her. The buzzing feeling in the hand you'd held was too intriguing to him.

"Can I have her address?" Jeonghan blurted.

The couple stared at him as if he'd grown a third head. "Um, why would you need that?" asked his best friend in confusion.

Because maybe having a soulmate isn't as bad as I'd thought it'd be.

[rachetmath]

Favorite (Characters)

Ruby: *barges in* RatchetMath!

Me: What is it Ruby?

Ruby: You’re showing favoritism.

Me: Okay. And?

Ruby: You need to stop. Why not draw us for once?

Me: Hm, maybe because I like Jaune more. Hell I like Penny and Neo more than you or your team.

Ruby: Why?!

Me: Because your team is horrible.

Ruby: So is team JNPR!

Me: Yeah, but only because they have to follow you. They have some individuality but we don’t explore that as much. Plus, your team would be dead without them. But you know what Ruby, I would rather draw Yang, Blake or any other character except Weiss than you right now.

Ruby: What?! But I’m-

Me: The main character that barely does main character things. Woman, Salem was in Atlas! Why was she not your top priority? Why was James your problem?

Ruby: Um well…

Me: Ruby, she knows your mother! She might know what happened to her! I get Yang was some levels your mom but shouldn’t learning what happened to your actual mom be just as important? Especially after that dark memory.

Ruby: That is true.

Me: You have silver eyes but you still don’t know how to use them. There was army of grimm around Mantle and that would have been good practice. And a better solution than Ren.

Ruby: But then I be overpowered.

Me: No. Ruby your silver eyes only work on one person. If someone sneaks up on you or doesn’t care about that light you give off then, you’re dead. Maria is proof on that.

Ruby: Um..

Me: Plus, the question that everyone in the audience could have an answer to is whether your silver eyes can even work on Salem. In all honesty, it proves the writer don’t keep track of the characters and their personalities to where they fit together in story. You know what I have been making skits, trying to be funny but… the jokes died. Look guys I-I’m sorry but… let me explain.

1. Ruby and Blake should have stayed in Mantle. Why?

1. Salem is the main villian. She knows Ruby’s mother. You know the same mother who left for a mission and didn’t come back. The same mother, who Ruby knows nothing about while everyone seems to have different perspectives of her. Or has a better clue on who she is, than Ruby herself. Plus wasn’t Salem after her too? She basically would be killing two birds with one stone by kidnapping Oscar and giving Ruby a reason to see her. That way Ruby isn’t assuming what happened to her mother. Let Salem antagonize Ruby. (Question: Can silver eyes work on Salem?)

2. Perfect training for silver eyes. Let’s face it, Ren proved to us he can mask a bunch of people without Jaune’s help. All he needed was concentration. However, Ruby is more effective because silver eyes seem to be able to destroy multiple grimm on sight. And with lives on the line that gives Ruby plenty of reason to start using them.

3. Ren calling Ruby out on her issues. Look I loved how Ren was willing to tell the truth, but him revealing Jaune cheated Beacon was… weak. Reason being it relates to Jaune’s character and Ren still follows Jaune’s orders. However, Ruby, who is supposed to be a prodigy because she came to Beacon two years ahead of her class, has not proven once that she is worthy of such praise. The only reason-The ONLY reason Ruby was enrolled into Beacon was her silver eyes. Ruby even in volume one has been nothing but liability. Initiations, she almost dies from a Stinger. Stake out, she almost got run over by a truck and it ended in failure. First mission, she gets kidnapped and almost destroyed a city block. Roman, a man with no semblance or aura continues to beat her four times in a row. And it gets worse. Ruby almost got her uncle killed. She was the first to get knocked out by Emerald. Almost dies by a robot and Godzilla. And the moment she arrived in Atlas her first move was to lie to James. She didn’t even try to stop Tyrian when she saw him. She had her gun with her too. Ren is not her sister, he might as well tell her the facts so she can do better.

4.  Blake is Faunus. Mantle hates faunuses. Why not have Blake help them to prove faunuses are people too? Let Blake represent her people. I mean Velvet and Sun represent faunses more than she does her whole existence. Blake also can relate to Ren’s problem. How? Blake was a part of the White Fang, so there were expectations she had to fulfill. Especially when trying to measure up to Adam. However, she explains the longer she was in the White Fang, the more she found out how messed up and extremely bias it was. Including with Adam to the point she decided to leave. She even states she was lucky that Yang even forgave her after all the trouble she caused her. Blake challenged her bias nature, and it made her stronger for it. Blake would be basically telling Ren the more he tries to live up to someone else’s expectations, without seeing their flaws, the more he loses touch with himself and everyone around him.

5.  Oscar shouldn’t have been able break out of Salem on his own: I’m sorry but… Oscar got beat up. Took a magic beam to the chest. Had to switch between him and Ozpin and mind you he had no aura to help him. He should be tired and unable to move. (In my opinion, this kid was given too much screen time. At first I was worried about him but now I’m wondering why was I worrying at all.)

2. Jaune and Yang should have gone to Atlas.

1. Penny is basically Pyrrha in the opposite light. Penny’s special because she’s a robot with a soul, a mind of her own and an attitude to prove it. She is just as human as everyone else, but no one seems to treat her as such. James only sees her as something of a weapon. Pietro treats her like child even though she’s more mature than the rest of the female cast, except Maria. And now with maiden powers, everyone is out casting Penny even more. Jaune is perfect for her because he has experience with this kind of issue. However, he would’ve had to take different route to the situation considering his failure with Pyrrha last time they had discussion on maiden powers or responsibilities (Destiny.).

2. Jaune already has been a part of maiden business since volume three. His reason to be with Penny would be make sure she doesn’t meet the same fate as Pyrrha or Amber. Not just for himself but for others around him. Especially since Cinder was in Atlas and is willing to hunt her down for the maiden powers. And James was willing to turn Penny into a soulless machine to follow his every command. (Actually, Watts is more a fault considering he hates Pietro.). James and Cinder are also opposite to Jaune in some ways.  James earned his position and earned respect from his military. Jaune on the other hand cheated, and unlike James might not have everybody’s respect. Cinder treats her allies like tools. And with power she just consumes and gives nothing return. Jaune however treats his allies like family. And instead of just taking power he gives power to others around him. He’s the reason Cinder has maiden powers. So, him making it his personal mission to make sure Cinder doesn’t get more power only increases his resolve to protect Penny. (Especially since he already had to kill her in the canon finale.)  In other words, James and Cinder purposed a challenge to Jaune. Can he pervert history from repeating itself? Can he really protect the maiden powers? Is he truly worthy of being a huntsman? What is he willing to risk in achieving his goal? (Also let’s be clear. Hazel beat Oscar down for the password to the relic. James shot the kid and was willing to let him fall to his death. Qrow intentionally punched the kid.  I don’t care if it was for Ozpin, he still punched Oscar. Lion before even knowing Oscar was Ozpin reincarnation was already about kill him anyways. All Jaune did was push him to a wall. Yes, Jaune still would have hurt Oscar, but he didn’t. He walked away.)  

3.  A lot of the situations could’ve been avoided or mattered if Jaune was there. Don’t believe me? Well let me explain. Was Ruby the only option when sneaking pass Central Command? No, because they had Weiss, Nora and Penny. Weiss could have done a freezer burn like in her fight with Marrow. Or Nora could have thrown her grenades and Penny just shoots them before the hit the ground or damage anything. Both causing a smoke screen, so no one sees them. Plus, they were already caught by using Pietro credentials. Did Nora need to get knocked out for the team to escape? No. If she had Jaune with her they could’ve one caused an EMP wave being Jaune has gravity and Nora has lightning. Or two, if Nora still went through with it, Jaune would have healed her immediately. Penny lifting and keeping the arena in place. If Jaune and Weiss were with her then once Amity was in position, Weiss with Jaune’s assistances can keep it place so Penny can come back inside and the whole video could be played. Also, Pietro would know what was going on with his daughter and can properly explain how to fix her. (Better than Jaune healing her.)

4. Nora’s whole character is knowing who she is without Ren right? Then why not just have her lead the evacuation once she’s done with Atlas? Why not have her and Yang work together along with the happy huntress to evacuate Mantle? Especially if their friends disappeared to save Oscar. (And before ya’ll tell me they can’t do it….. Yang, blocked a punch from a mech, held off a Manticore, and has a semblance that literally lets her take damage and dish it back five times harder. Nora who literally crushed Weiss and Yang in a food fight. Knocked a giant horse down on its knee. And knocked Hazel away.  Are you seriously saying these girls are not enough to take on a few little tigers? Come on!) If the whole point of Nora’s character development was finding out more about herself then let Nora try something without Ren. Let her call the shots. Let her take charge. Give her a character. (Hell don’t stop there. Have her interact with other characters. Like Jaune. Yang. Weiss. Or anyone other character than Ren. Let them tell her what they think about her. Let Nora be a solution to a character’s struggle. Ya’ll make it sound like Nora has no friends.)

5. All Yang needed was a break from Ruby and Blake. In all honesty Yang should have been the one to see the hounds face and kill it. Why? Well Ruby is Yang’s sister and only reminder of her nonblood related mother. And Blake is her girlfriend. And if we saw the hound’s face, we know it’s not just a silver eyed person. It’s also a faunus. This will give her a reason to protect both her loved ones because by seeing the hound she knows Salem intention with Ruby and want to keep her, and Blake from meeting the same fate of being turned into monsters. Yang should’ve been the 2nd to 4th member of team RWBY to fall. Why? One, a Yang vs Neo fight. Two, Cinder and Neo both wanted Ruby dead. So why not get rid of Ruby first? The fights would have been more thrilling and seeing the character, the show is named after, presumed to be dead would have added stakes and tension to the fight. (Also let me say this. Why is it, that the only great display of the maiden powers I’ve ever seen, was from Amber and not the maidens, as of now, Winter, Raven, and Cinder? The maiden powers are basically magic right? Why isn’t Cinder using any other element than fire?)

6. Weiss was completely useless. Look, as the saying goes, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” And when it came to Weiss and family, she has little to no clue of what it is nor deserves it. Weiss should have been more of an inspiration for Whitley to do right. How? By simply talking to him. What reason would she have other than Mantle? Simple, he’s her brother and she started off like him. Beacon, she was a brat. She was arrogant. And more importantly a jerk. Blake ran because of her racist attitude. Ruby literally had to impress her to prove she can be leader. Even though Weiss is not leadership martial herself.  Plus, hearing May and how she and her family never resolved their issues should inspire Weiss to not repeat that mistake. And guess what, her mom, Willow, the drinker of the family, wasn’t wrong. Both her and Winter left Whitley alone. Klein wasn’t there for him either. All Whitley had was his father. So Weiss, actually acting like his sister and trying to help him allows him to feel less alone. Instead Weiss was complete Jacque through out the entire volume.  

And that’s all.  Look I know I should have seen this coming but I had to say it.  Volume 8 could’ve been good. The problem was.

1.       Characters are not placed well within the story.

2.       We lost track of who said characters are.

3.       The ships are in the way.

4.       Being dumb for the plot. (Sometimes it’s necessary.)

[bakugohoex]

you asked for horseface reqs? 😼😼 n e ways let’s spice it up w some angst okay reader and jean have had feelings for each other for a reaaallyy long time but they won’t admit it (especially the reader because she’s scared she’ll get hurt if he loses him one day) but the time when she finally admits her feelings it’s when she gets killed trying to protect jean from an attack during the marley arc

“this might be the end for me, but jean, oh god, jean you meant everything to me”

pairing: jean kirschtein x female reader

cw: angst, language, last kiss, violence and some season four stuff but i haven’t read the manga so this is from the information of wikia, go cry please 

word count: 2200+

a/n: someone sent a similar request so i incorporated this one with that one as well, if you guys want to see the request here it is, it is quiet similar, i dislike writing angst but i was sad so i thought it was a good time to write it

summary: in which you and jean have had crushes on each other since the first day you met, instead of admitting your feelings, you both waited till you knew you’d have a secure future, and the invasion of liberio, in your final minutes you confess it all

↞ back to attack on titan masterlist

Wildflowers bloomed from the soil, the sun peaked through the fog and the birds chirped loudly at the sound of shouting. The first time you met Jean Kirschtein, the sound of Shadis headbutting the brunette, he held his face after his cocky remark of joining the military police. You stood firm lazily gazing at him, there was something to him, you didn’t know what it was, but he had something to him. You thought you two would never become friends, but instantly becoming friends with Armin and Marco you seemed to be surrounded by those who would be in the top ten.

You never wanted to join the military police, they were all scared little freaks who only cared about money and living a secure life. There was no fun it, you had been with Jean, when Marco had been found dead. He collapsed right on top of you and instantly knew that you two were bound together, the feelings of hurt seeing Marco dead in front of you.

It wasn’t something you ever wanted to see, and you never wanted to see one of your comrades die ever again.

He looked at you after the body count of Trost had been announced, “I’m joining you in the survey corps.”

You were shocked to say the least, the man who had been adamant on joining the military police had switched sides out of vengeance from what you could assume. You went up to him, your hand cupping his face, “I know you want to avenge Marco, but make sure you’re doing this for yourself.”

“I know.” He spoke quietly, his face nuzzling into your palm, you stood there feeling fresh tears come out of his eyes. Tears fell out of your own, as you both stayed there crying and holding each other, needing the comfort after your friends death.

The four months went by quickly, with Eren turning into a titan, finding out about Annie, Berthold and Reiner. It was a traitorous act and you wanted to kill them all, it was the only thing that filled your mind once you had found out about it. But there was something more you had now, you spent more and more time partnered with Jean and every day you seemed to fall more and more in love.

You were aware that you had prominent feelings from the boy, the first time these feelings erupting the second day of training when you got partnered up. He had helped you with a technique that you had seen Annie do. Not only were you surprised by his help but also how he engaged in your life when you talked about your past. He wasn’t the cocky bastard he had been the night before and you fell for him instantly, the way even though he seemed selfish he still cared and especially after being a leader in Trost you began to admire him even more.

You both grew closer and closer and evidently; the rest of the survey corps had noticed your feelings. Often teasing you both any possibility they could get, you both acknowledged something was there but never acted upon it. Feelings and emotions, it got in the way of fighting Titans, and the risk of losing one another in a relationship hurt more than it would if you two remained friends. There would be nothing holding the two of you back when going to fight Titans. But even then, you both still pined and worried for one another when you got separated.

It remained both your thought process for the next four years until the raid on Liberio occurred, the day that you regretted not confessing it all. The corps had all arrived in Marley and the raid had begun, both you and Jean had grown into warriors, with no mercy and a mission to get on with. The two of you were on separate sides, you prayed he would be fine, remembering a conversation that had had hours prior.

“Y/n, can we talk?” Jean spoke away from the group, he was so much taller than you now, his brunette hair a lot longer and the rugged look he had made you fall even more in love. Even after six years everything about him made your heart melt.

“Sure.” You were wearing the new black gear, it fitted you perfectly and Jean tried to not admire you.

“I just want to say good luck, I know we’re on opposite sides which never occurs with us but stay safe.”

You laughed at his consistent hesitance to speak, “come on Jean, you know me, I wouldn’t die without you by my side.”

You spoke light hearted but he looked at you tense, “don’t die at all without me.”

“I pinkie promise I won’t die without you.” You put your pinkie out, he rolled his eyes taking the pinkie.

You let go first walking back, “I love you Y/n.” He whispered, it wasn’t audible, and you would’ve never heard it.

You were alongside Mikasa, both of you fighting the Marleyans together, you noticed the Cart Titan, its jaws wide to eat any of you guys up. You were shocked having not seen it in years now, that wasn’t the only shock you got hearing a rumble at the sound of the Beast titan appearing, it looked even taller than the first time you had seen it. It came even more closer and closer towards you both, you saw its arm come closer and closer to you and Mikasa.

You both barely missed his arm swing, before you felt it again, your stomach churned as those around you went full throttle at the Titan, you attached your ODM gear onto its arm that had kept swinging. You thought you had somewhat of chance, but you didn’t expect to see him grab onto the gear with his other hand.

Holding you in mid-air, you could feel the air being squeezed out of you. “P…please.” You tried pleading, kicking and screaming, all you could think about was the promise you made to Jean. “I’m not going to die.” You shouted, feeling your bones being crushed, you grabbed one of the blades, dragging it down his hand, you slid down, out of his grip. You choked needing air, Mikasa grabbing you to help you up.

“Y/n, we need to get to the other side.” You nodded, moving to the other side you tried to stay out of the Beast titans way, seeing as your comrades got shot down.

You finally saw Eren in titan form, knowing you were close to where you were supposed to meet. You saw Jean swing past a smirk on his face, but as he saw you a worried look at how damaged and disbelieved you looked. You knew you’d have to explain later, the way he looked at you melted your insides. Even after the many years he still saw you as the prettiest girl alive and would do anything for you.

You stared at the boy, but what you hadn’t realised whilst being in the air was how the Beat titan had charged towards you. Jean noticed shouting your name, but you heard nothing, feeling the Beast titan, grab onto you, this time you had nothing. You were vulnerable, you saw Jean come up trying to rescue, instead of crushing you, it instead threw you into a building.

Tears filled your eyes whilst in the air, you felt like you had been punched in the gut, before hitting the building, your insides bleeding and the way your side and legs were met with slits from the building that conveniently had sharp spikes in it. You slid down from the roof your body limp as you felt nothing. Just as you were about to reach the bottom, Jean swung past grabbing you before you were out.

“Y/n, Y/n, come on wake up.” You heard Jean speak as he took you into an alleyway. “Y/n, come on.”

The pleading nature of him being heard but you were unconscious and unable to move, everything hurt, and you refused to open your eyes and move. Your body was deteriorating, and you could feel every bit of it. “Y/n, come on, our promise, you said you wouldn’t die without me, don’t die on me.”

You heard it all, you wanted to say you were okay. But you weren’t, you were dying in front of him, he had tried to help stop the bleeding, but being crushed and thrown around, your body was failing on you.

You woke up, everything hurting, still in the alleyway, Jean looked at you, his hand in yours. “Y/n, don’t move, it might hurt.”

You started to cough, he was about to let go of your hand to get some water from his side, but you grabbed his hand softly, “Jean, i...I’m going to die.”

He looked at you shock on his face, “Y/n, you…you’re fine, don’t say that.”

“Jean, the beast…” You stated to cough again, but you kept a hold of his hands preventing him from leaving, if these were your last moments then you knew you’d want it to be with Jean. “…the beast titan, he crushed all my bones, I’ve lost too much blood and this.”

You gestured to your now exposed side seething in blood and your legs that had been attacked by the hooks, the pain engulphed you and you needed something to preoccupy your emotions.

“Y/n, we’ll get to the walls, and they’ll…they’ll save you.”

“Jean.” You spoke softly, he saw how you looked more frailer and weaker every time you spoke. “Promise me, you’ll win and…and you’ll continue on with your life”

“Y/n, we’ll win.” Tears had formed in his eyes at how weak you had gotten. “and we’ll live a life together, you won’t die.”

A single tear went down your face, “Jean, I love you and I regret not telling you.”

He looked down at you, trying to wipe the tears that had formed on his own face before wiping the tears that had erupting from your face, “I love you too.”

“Fuck, it hurts.” You muttered. 

“Y/n, how can i…I help?” He didn’t want to admit you were about to die but if you were going to die, then he would make sure he remained by your side.

“Can you kiss me?” You asked, he tried to stop the tears, your hand had gotten colder, and the blood had seeped through the cloth that he had used to stop the consistent blood pouring from your body.

He helped you sit up right, sitting on his body, as you lazily looked up to his face, you spoke softly at the boy. “this might be the end for me, but jean, oh god, jean you meant everything to me”

“You were my world.” He whispered before the pain was becoming even more unbearable and you knew you had minutes at most.

His hands went to cup your face as he kissed you softly, bringing your mouth to his own it was everything you had ever dreamt of and so much more.

Memories filled your head, your first meeting with the boy, the countless times you were partnered up and then the time that would remain with you forever. The day when you had reached the ocean, you were glad you had experienced the sea, having played in the water with the boy. You remembered how you both had gotten soaked and how you continued to mess about, all the years of memories filled you in one single kiss.

Your hand rested on his cheek as you kissed back, your body dying on you ever so quickly, rubble poured from above, he let go softly looking at you, love and hope filled his eyes. He needed you to be okay, ideas in his head of how to help you, but as you spoke again, “I love…”

Nothing. No more words came from you and they never would. He would never hear your laugh, your voice, your scolding. He’d never feel you kick or hit him, never feel your soft touch on his. You  slouched onto his neck and a shout erupted from the man’s voice and even more tears flooded his face. Everybody had heard the screaming he held your dead body in his arms, the blood on his gear and body. He didn’t care, you had died in front of him and as he kept a hold of you, he could see the Eldian air craft, grabbing your body in his arms, he held you using his gear to get onto the ship.

You were gone forever, and he never got to ask you on a date, never got to kiss and show his love for you every day. He regretted never telling you, and as he brought you on the ship, he was met with every single person who had stuck by his side. You were in his arms limp and cold, they stared as his knees fell through, your body on the ground, eyes closed and face cold. He mourned the loss of the only person who he truly loved, he hadn’t protected you and now he had nobody.

i’d really appreciate if you guys could leave a like, reblog or comment, thanks x

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[noroi1000]

• Yuji is not a terrible Yandere. It gives you more space than you think. (When he's in a good mood). But if he gets pissed at you for some reason, he'll keep from exploding, but I can't guarantee he'll be able to stay calm.

• The most common reason for it to flare up is when you try to run away, or not listen to it and distance yourself from it. While not listening and moving away from his person, he is able to control himself and keeps trying until he is successful. But trying to escape is the worst choice you can make. Then he is unable to help himself. 

•He won't hurt you. And if it's not a big one. At worst, he slaps you in the face with his open palm. And then he quickly leans over you, apologizing and saying how sorry he is. In better cases, they've just pinned you to the wall, floor, bed, table, anything they might hold you on... And he will talk to your face or ear in such a voice that you feel shivers all over your body. 

• If you think about where it started, nobody knows. Even Yuji himself. He met you, he liked you, he fell in love with you, he was jealous of everything you did with others, and in the end he became obsessed with you.

• He tried to take you away from danger and from other people, fearing that he would lose you without even saying he loved you. 

• After realizing that he could not always protect you and isolate you from other people, he became paranoid for a day, being very close to you all day.. He even reacted to a minor stumble, quickly grabbing you tightly, fearing that something had happened to you. At the end of the day, only one idea flashed through his mind. Get you out of there. 

• At night, when you were asleep, he gently took you out of bed, taking care not to wake you up by accident, taking you to the room where he trained while he was "dead". When you woke up you didn't know where you were. It was a strange place to you. When Itadori saw the terror in your eyes, he ran to the couch on which you were lying and tried to calm you down. "Oi. (y / n) Calm down. I'm here."• When you asked him what are you doing here, he calmly replied that he had brought you here. Despite your screams and pleas for him to let you out of this place, he remained adamant. Even though he couldn't look at your tears as he blocked your passage by locking the door, he said he wouldn't let you out. 

• After you calmed down, he was ready to talk, but you weren't. You just wanted to get out of here. Nothing else."(y / n) -chan Calm down. I can't let you go! I love you too much to see you suffer in this world! "

• You didn't care about all his words. Even if he confessed his love to you. "(y / n) I love you. I won't let you go out" His eyes change instantly. From concerned, gentle eyes they turn almost scary. Obsessive.

• When a Gojo finds out that he is holding you there, he comes to intervene. If you are a civilian, he may allow him to be with you that way if he doesn't hurt you. 

However, if you are from his class, he will try to separate him from you. But. Yuji won't let go that easily. Even if he has to fight for you with the strongest Jujutsu sorcerer, he will do it anyway. To be safe. If Yuji is adamant about protecting you in his way, the Gojo MAY let him leave you there. He knows Yuji and knows that he is going towards his goal. He will leave things as they are, as long as you are happy with him. He can't let him keep you locked up near the school. Therefore, he he allows his student to keep you to himself because he understands what he is afraid of. But all under this one condition and its controls. That's why Yuji takes you to another place.

• Yuji promises him that you will be happy with him, even trying to make you fall in love with him. For you, love for him has either faded or faded out. ( I think the latter). If he hadn't kidnapped you, you could have been together without any obstacles. But he did. It may take you some time to fall in love with him. But he won't give up. He will be with you until you are happy together, and then for the rest of your life. This man keeps his promises, and the Gojo comes in once a week to check his progress. The gojo himself helps Yuji to hide you, even telling the other students that you've been away for a while.

• His attempts to escape became futile when he took all that was sharp. One day when you woke up you just heard noises and then you saw him opening all drawers and cupboards throwing things into his bag that could hurt. He even considered bringing spoons. He once saw a movie where a girl gouged out her eye with a spoon. Before leaving with all these things, he said sweetly.

• He doesn't like it when you don't listen to him. He hates it. When you want a hug, it's better to do it. Being very pissed off is unpredictable. Sometimes he knocks over furniture and screams, and then he wants to hug you again and calm your fear of him. "Hug me. I just want you to hug me (y / n) " 

• But when he doesn't demolish the house, he'll get up and ignore you until you need his touch and talk, or he can't take anymore. During his ignorance towards you, every time you touch him he will push you away.

• Yandere Yuji is obsessed with your protection. He always wants to protect you. 

• All the cuts that you did to yourself while alone at home are carefully dressed in front of him so that even a scar will not be left behind.. He knows you made it to yourself because of him, but he still won't let you leave. I never want your gentle hands, which he loves to hold and feel, to be cut. 

• After a while, he starts to feel bad when he hugs you, kisses you, and holds your hand while watching movies, and you don't reciprocate. He begins to feel guilty.

• He worries when you don't try to run anymore or do nothing to get out. He knows you've finally given up. You no longer react to anything he does with you. He preferred when you fought his tenderness because you are emotionless now. "(y / n). Please talk to me. What happened to you?" 

• When you try to answer him, your mouth opens for a moment and then closes again, giving up any words. 

"(y / n) Please. Say something. I love you. I'm sorry for everything I've done to you. But please talk to me. I just want you to love me. Please..." 

He talks desperately to you as tears run down his face. 

• After the next weeks spent like this, he starts to be even nicer to you. Until you unexpectedly fall in love with him. The thought was starting to circulate in his mind that it all didn't make sense and you would never love him. When he tries for the last time, talking to you when he was kneeling and crying, he lowered his gaze wanting to break and say he would let you out of here again and you gently wiped his tears away. He looked at you in astonishment and you hugged him, kneeling in front of him. Knowing what it means, he smiled slightly and put his arms around you and then kissed you passionately and cried with happiness when you kissed him back.

• As your relationship grows, it will start to let you out of your home. The more he trusts you, the more he lets you. 

• You just have to remember that he is jealous if anyone in town talks to you.

• In short, he does this for your protection. He can't be angry with you all the time and he needs your attention. He cannot explain all why he is doing it, but he knows one thing for sure. He loves you more than anything.

[fangirlings-things]

Chicago PD Preference: When they first realize they're in love with you

requested by anon || A/N: hope you like it, love 💖 || tag list: @imaginesofyourfandom ; @regalbanshee

Jay Halstead— he would realize he loved you for the first time after you got injured on the job, during an operation that went terribly wrong. He blamed himself deeply for not being there to protect you when he had to, being your partner at Intelligence. He would be scared to death that you wouldn't pull through and he wouldn't even be able to tell you about how he felt. At the end you did manage to survive, and he couldn't even contain his relief when he stood at the door of your room at Med and saw you still asleep from the surgery.

"(Y/N)'s going to be fine" his brother, Will, said as he stood beside Jay at the corridor. He could see it in his brother's eyes just how much he cared for you. "You have nothing to worry about"

"Don't I?" Jay echoed, still a bit under shock as he watched you, eyes not leaving your being for even a second. He seemed to fear you would disappear if he looked away.

"No, you don't" Will placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it tenderly. "Hey" only then, Jay looked at his face. "You will be able to tell (Y/N) how you feel" at that, Jay flashed him a small grateful smile.

The idea of telling you in the future, did excite him.

Adam Ruzek— he would come to terms with his feelings for you one night when he saw someone hitting on you at Molly's. Jealousy would unexpectedly take a deep hold on him and that would make him see that it wasn't just friendship, what you two had. At least, that wasn't all he wanted. He wanted to be with you, to love you. And so, he would make it his goal to have the courage to tell you just how he really felt.

"What happened there?" he asked you with a emotionless expression on his face as he sat at your table, pretending he did not care while referring to the someone who had just walked away from you not looking too happy.

"Didn't feel like it" you shrugged, smiling at him before taking a long sip of your beer. "What about you, Ruzek? Not leaving with anyone tonight?"

Adam smiled before shrugging just like you had done. "No, I'm happy to just spend the night here drinking with you"

You smiled widely and raised your beer in the air. "Well, cheers to that"

Antonio Dawson— he would realize how he felt about it when you comforted him during a really bad case. No other members of the unit had even noticed that it got to him that hard, but you did. When he excused himself and went to the precinct's parking lot, you followed right into his car and just waited. For him to talk, to have the time of silence he needed. Whatever it was that he was going to do to get over it, you wanted him to know that he could count on you. And for him, that mattered more than you could ever imagine.

"We should get back there" he would say after sometime, where you both just stayed there in the silence. He motioned to get out of the car, but you gently grabbed his forearm, making him stop.

"Hey" you waited until he fall back against the seat again and looked at you to continue speaking. "Voight won't care if we are just a few minutes away. We don't have anything new yet"

"That's exactly what worries me" Antonio said in something that was just a little above a whisper, with a heavy sight that put out all of his frustration.

Instead of saying something else you reached out and grabbed his hand, squeezing it tightly as you watched his face. You gave him a small smile, made him know that you were there, whatever happened. With his heart filled with joy in the middle of that chaos, he was able to smile back at you.

Kevin Atwater— he would realize he had feelings for you unexpectedly, during a day when you showed up a bit late for work because you had stopped by to buy them all donuts and coffee. Your smile as you gave everyone the little gifts, the laughter you let out when Voight wasn't able to hide how much he had liked his coffee, all of that suddenly got to him like a punch in the face. He liked you, a lot. And honestly, he didn't know if he would be able to hide it for too long.

"I was beginning to think you had forgotten me" Kevin said when you got to him, as he leaned against his desk with a smile on his lips just by watching you.

"How could I?" you smiled back at him, while reaching to the inside of the donuts box. "This one is for you" you gave him a apparently delicious cinnamon twist.

"Oh, come on, you do know you are playing with my heart here, right?" he let the words leave his mouth in a rush, before he could even stop himself or rethink the sentence. His tone was filled with irony, but the meaning behind those words... that was quite true.

You smiled, shrugging slightly. "Good"

Hank Voight— he would realize how he felt about you after a very successful case, having just them taken notice of his how good you worked and functioned together. That smoothness that surrounded you both, the way you were both really comfortable around each other and how you did not hesitate to fight him when he was wrong, unlike others, all those things opened his eyes for the fact that what he felt for you was more than just Sargeant affection towards a subordinate.

"This went better than I expected" you said, going to stand by his Hank's side at the sidewalk. Your arms were crossed over your chest as you watched the criminal that just got busted by Intelligence be placed into the patrol car.

"You did good police work, (Y/N)" he smiled, eyes going to the criminal just for seconds later to go back to you. Somehow, his eyes always kept going back to you.

"Thank you, Sarge" you said, almost unable to hide how proud of yourself you were in that moment. Deep down, you tried to not make it a big deal just how much a compliment from him meant to you.

Erin Lindsay— her feelings would finally make sense to her after seeing you with your family one day after shift. She noticed all the love and caring you guys shared and being someone who did not have that kind of love for a great part of her life, it made her happy to see that you had that. You seemed to shine when you where with the people you loved and that made her want to be one of those people, to be able to put that kind of smile on your face just by being there, beside you.

"Hey, Lindsay, you want to join us for dinner?" you asked while having your arm joined with your mother's, a welcoming smile in both of your faces.

"I want her to go!" your little cousin said, while looking up at Erin with those childish, big curious eyes that melted her heart.

When she answered, she was looking directly at you. "I would love that"

Kim Burgess— she would realize how she really felt about you after you spent a whole day together on a lookout, outside a suspect's house, sharing food and talking about the most random things possible while simultaneously, working on the case. The easy conversation, good vibe and the comfort you found in open up to each other would make her have to think hard on how she felt, which would lead to further realization

"Did I tell you about the day me and Adam made a drinking contest against some of the firefighters from firehouse 51 at Molly's?" you asked, right before taking a sip of your orange juice. Your eyes checked the suspect's house, everything was clear.

Kim on the driver's seat, turned her head towards you with a smile on her lips. It amazed her, how you seemed to always have something funny or interest to say. Made her want to hear what you had to say all the time. "You did not, but now you'll have to"

You laughed, then started off, excitedly, while remembering what happened on the said day. "So, me and Adam had been drinking alone for some time and then, Cruz comes along..."

Hailey Upton— she would realize how she felt for you when during an interrogation you two were leading together, you got threatened by the suspect. It would drive her mad, to have that person even thinking about hurting you in any way. The very enraged look they had upon you would make her want to do something reckless or eve stupid, something that would take them away from you. Anything. All that protectiveness and worry, she realized, was not just friendship. Couldn't be.

"I can't believe they had the nerve to threaten you" she said more to herself then to you, when you both walked out of the interrogation room together. The expression on her face was furious. "To say that, to even think about—" she interrupted herself with a heavy sight, looking at everywhere but you.

"It's okay, Hailey, really. I've received worse threats before" you tried to make a bit of a joke to easy the tension, but she was having none of it. You could see the anger and worry in her eyes. "Hey, hey" you touched her shoulder gently, making her stop and look at you. "Everything's fine"

Hailey nodded for a moment and you thought she was going to let it go, but then she walked straight towards you and held you tightly in a hug. You smiled softly, glad for her being so protective. Little did you know, all her feelings for you were now very clear on her mind.