#and 2. my schedule at my current job is a lot more flexible so i dont wanna lose that

[skeletons-in-ur-closet]

RAHHHHH i got a job after 3 weeks of applying and 2 interviews but i cant even take it bc conflict of interest D:

[turtlesandfrogs]

So, here's the problem: the longer I work in gardening and landscaping, the more I care about the ecological impacts of native plants, and the less I care about aesthetics. Which is a problem, when most clients' primary concern is that their yard looks nice. Which, fair, I just don't care as much about it as they do and I feel like I could be making a bigger impact than I currently am.

So I'm thinking of quitting this job and going one of two entirely different directions, and for some reason it's rather hard to choose.

Option A is starting my own native plant nursery, which would focus on small (4 inch and gallon pot sized) native plants, with a focus on plants that are most important for native pollinators (especially those that are endangered or threatened where I am). There's some competition, but mostly at selling-to-landscapers level and not retail, and I'd want to focus on retail sales.

Option B is to get a job with the state doing some kind of ecological restoration work. The problem with that is my bachelor's degree is over a decade old and I don't actually have the kind of experience to put on my resume that would likely convince them that I can do the work (unless a combination of teaching and being self-employed as a gardener that helps people incorporate native plants and removes invasive species counts, which maybe?). So I'd probably have to take a lower level job and one that's further away to get in, and then work my way up.

Option A has the upsides of: completely setting my own schedule, getting to work with plants most of the time, getting to work with my partner, flexibility to decide I want to start teaching classes again or something. It has the down sides of having to do taxes multiple times per year, and not being guaranteed to work, and either needing to take out a business loan to get started or work at a day job to fund starting it up. Also if it fails I'll have to get another job without have professional references again, which yikes.

Option B has the upside of once you're in state work, it's way easier to get other state jobs so if I burn out of one job, I can hop to another relatively easily, will almost certainly make more money, comes with health insurance and retirement savings, and is likely the more stable option. On the down side, it would mean working 40 hours a week without getting to pick my schedule and it would be harder to take time off than it is now, I'll have to work my way up to a comfortable salary, and there's a lot less autonomy than when self employed. But I'll also have professional references out the wazoo, so finding new jobs should be easier?

One of the things that concerns me is I have ADHD and up until teaching, the longest I ever stayed in one job was almost 2 years. I taught for 4 years, then was self-employed as a gardener for 4 years, and now I've worked for this landscaping company for just over a year (and am grumpy about a) not making much money and b) aesthetics and only providing services to people who can afford us, rather than say, improving the environment for everyone). So I'm actually kinda afraid that if I started the native plant nursery, I would get sick of it after less than 5 years and be starting from scratch again. Whereas with a state job, I can pop over to a new job fairly easily. On the other hand, maybe I'm just doubting myself too much because all of those other jobs were actually really bad matches for me.

Anyway, my brain is going in circles over this. I mean, really, part of me thinks I should stay at this job even though it doesn't pay much compared to what I could make elsewhere (I have learned a lot though, which can be transfered to other jobs) just because it's so low stress compared to any other job I've had in the last decade & because the people are great and the work isn't bad. It just galls me that occasionally clients have ideas that I strongly disagree with, like cutting down a very nice magnolia tree because "it's too big" and I just have to do it because I'm an employee now. Ugh.

[skeletoninthemelonland]

Hi Starbs, sorry to hear about your situation, I am a bit younger than you and a couple of years ago I was put into a similar spot, even right now as I'm finishing up high-school my housing isn't very stable. I'll give you some tips if it's something that could help you. (I am from the USA so things are probably different over there) also apologies I am not good with English!!

SAVE. SAVE. SAVE. Budgeting and being frugal when it comes to money is extremely important!!

Do keep a bit of spending money as treats and keeping morality in check will do you good in the long run.

My storage unit costs me 66$ USD a month it's the size of a walk in closet. Whatever isn't essential or you can't carry in a backpack it's best you have a safe place to store it. Some will ask you to buy your own lock so keep that in mind.

Reach out to youth shelters! The one I'm staying at lets us stay 60 days but makes us leave at least 7 until we can come back. We can keep coming back as many times needed for us to find housing (as long as we don't have a record with causing problems at the shelter)

Learn your bus routes if you can, it saves more money than using a car.

Let trustworthy people know about your situation, friends, teachers, whoever, let them know as community and building a support system is essential.

Communicate with your college, perhaps they have dorms or programs that may be of assistance.

Eat!! Drink water!!! Take care of your hygiene!!!

Some gyms have showers so you can get a membership just to go shower if you need!

Cars can be very useful as you can sleep in them, there are camping spots rangers won't look through sometimes you could sleep at, 24 hour opened store parking lots, or in my case outside the gym you have a membership for that's open 24 hours!

Keep distance from your parents. I don't know your situation but from my experience, KEEP A DISTANCE AND HAVE FIRM BOUNDARIES!!! You don't owe them anything, not your location, who you're with, you're schedule, they don’t need to know that.

Apartments usually want you to make 2-3 times the rent. Example: rent is 600 a month? Then you need to make around 1200-1800 a month.

If you have a job communicate with your boss about your situation, they can be very flexible and understanding.

Don't burn bridges in the professional field!

Social networking is a life saver, if you make the right impressions with the right people it can come in clutch later on.

I'm repeating this again but building community and a support system is essential. Maybe a friend you get along well with also wants to move in, you could be roommates. Or an older woman who is fond of you learns about your situation and is willing the rent you a room in her home.

Pay attention to red flags!

Red flags in apartments can be how well maintain it is (mold underneath the sink) and how you’re landlord approaches it.

Red flags in people, like they could know you're desperate and will try to use that against you.

Do your laundry at friend's homes or in public laundromats.

Red flags in environments, maybe you end up in a bad part of town, get out ASAP!!

Share and update someone trustworthy often, you never know what could happen.

I wish I could offer you more but I'm currently still figuring out my situation as well. Stay safe!! Remember someone out there really loves you and wants you to be okay!! And you deserve to be okay!!

.

[phoenixyfriend]

Current State of Affairs - Personal

You may have noticed I haven't been posting much fanfic recently. While there have been other projects on my plate, like original fic and an event... I haven't gotten much done for those, either.

A few months back, I posted about having lost my job, and asked for your support. I still have savings, and I am in a safe situation as far as housing and food goes. However, I am unlikely to find another job for an indefinite period of time, as I am currently looking after an elderly relative, due to having more flexibility than other adults in my family.

I'm currently looking into employment options, but there is some difficulty, as the local minimum wage is about $2/hr, and remote to the US would have some timezone issues. I'm also unsure of how scheduling would be negotiated with the responsibilities I have to my family, given how uncertain the relative's health is.

As such, I'm trying to figure out how much of my income I can supplement through my writing. While I am under no illusions as to how low the median income for professional authors is, I'd like to get at least a little through this.

I will still be posting all my fanfiction for free and will not be accepting compensation for them for legal reasons. However, if you would like me to have more time for them, then supporting my original works through Patreon or donating directly to my ko-fi would be great.

For those who have already supported me, thank you, from the bottom of my heart. It's meant a lot to me.

PATREON: I am posting some original works, such as Hôtel des Automates, Wend Your Way to the Willow, or Glass Bones and Eyes Like Stars (available on tumblr). I am also posting a series of tutorials on how to worldbuild for fantasy or science fiction settings, which I call The ASPIRE Method. If either of those interest you, or if you want to vote/suggest other things I could work on, then please drop by and support me on Patreon.

Ko-Fi: While my ko-fi is primarily set up for general donations, I am also currently doing a small project where a $15+ donation means you can prompt an economic topic, and I will explain it on tumblr in 500 words as though to five-year-old, as I did for Macroeconomics and corporate terms.

If you've made it this far, thank you so much.

[thisantithesis]

sort of jegulus, just an idea i randomly wrote out at three in the morning. open ending??? pt 1, 1.2k words (pt 2)

Regulus sighed as he placed another book on the shelf, his attention far away from whatever shelf he was restocking. Snow was drifting down slowly outside, the late-afternoon dark grey sky making the library seem much gloomier than usual.

The golden lights cast an orange-tinted hue across the shelves and tables, and the fireplace crackled gently in its hearth against the wall of the lounge area. The combination of both gave the large and ornate room a warm and comfortable feeling, but didn’t do much in terms of providing sufficient light. Each table had its own lamp, many of which were currently being used by students as they crammed to study for their finals.

Regulus would usually be one of the people sitting at a table in quiet panic, spending so much time there that he would surely be the last one to leave, but instead here he was, slowly making his way through the cart of books that needed to be returned to their rightful place.

He didn’t dislike his job. He really didn’t. If anything, it was the best job he could have right then as a university student, what with its flexible hours and low demands. He popped in four days a week, from noon until six p.m., then left and went back to his apartment. It was an easy schedule, one that allowed him to take his classes in the morning and do whatever he wanted in the evening, which was more than a lot of working students had. It’s just that, as he watched the first snowfall of the year through the large windows of the library, he found that he would much rather be outside, letting the flakes land in his hair and touch his skin with little pinpricks of cold.

Someone had once told him that the snow in his pitch black curls made it look like he had his own little galaxy swirling in his hair. He thought about that quiet observation every day.

So, every year when Fall slowly turned to Winter, when the weather started getting colder and the world started losing its colorful warmth, Regulus waited with bated breath for that first snowfall. He always made sure to be outside when it happened so he could let his little galaxy form atop his head and reminisce on what he thought were better days.

Placing the last book on its proper shelf, Regulus quickly put the cart away and steadily walked toward the front desk of the library.

“Ms. Pince,” he said as he put his hands flat on the desk in front of him.

“Yes, Mr. Black?” she replied almost tonelessly, her back to him and her head bent over whatever she was working on.

He steeled himself, not necessarily expecting being denied at his request but still preparing for it. Ms. Pince wasn’t known to be lenient. “Would I be able to leave a bit earlier today? I need to study for my finals and I’ve already finished unloading the returns cart.”

She slowly turned her head towards where he had placed the cart, lifting an eyebrow as she checked the watch on her wrist. “All right. The library closes in an hour, so I don’t see the harm. Will you be here tomorrow?”

The library closed at seven p.m. on the weekends, and given that it was a Saturday Regulus was right to think that it would work in his favor. He tried to suppress his little smile of triumph. “Yes, same time as today. My class ends at noon so I should get here at around quarter past.”

The librarian nodded and turned back to her project. “Have a good night, Mr. Black.”

“You as well, Ms. Pince. And thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow.

She simply hummed in acknowledgement and Regulus all but sprinted towards the closet deemed as the “break room”. It consisted of wall to wall shelves filled with ancient and dusty tomes, with a newer addition of a small table, a chair, and some pegs haphazardly tacked onto the back of the door for coats and bags. The room was big enough to walk around in, even with the table, but it was so dusty back there that spending more than fifteen minutes in the room made Regulus’ throat run dry.

He shoved the door open, grabbed his things, then quickly walked towards the library’s side doors. No one really knew about them, given that they were hidden by some of the shelves, so you either found them by looking or accidentally stumbling upon them—which is exactly how Regulus had found them.

He put his coat on as he walked and looped his scarf around his throat tightly, then readjusted the strap of his bag as he opened the doors and stepped onto the freshly fallen snow.

It had been snowing incessantly for the past three hours, and Regulus had hoped it would be one of those first snowfalls that kept going for hours and hours, or at least until there was a decent amount sticking to the ground, and he was glad to see that this year was exactly like that.

Regulus smiled softly and tipped his head back, enjoying the quiet sound of snow falling on his face and the stillness the world around him seemed to adopt whenever winter arrived.

The side doors of the library opened up to a hidden area beside the building, a place Regulus liked to call the Statue Garden. The patch of grass was filled with statues of Greek gods and goddesses, all covered in green branches and moss as a result of the passing of time. Now though, now they were covered in a faint dusting of white, somehow making them look that much more regal.

Regulus closed his eyes against the falling flakes, a serene feeling spreading throughout his chest and slowly unknotting the anxiety that always resided heavily there.

A crunch of footsteps broke through the quiet making Regulus whip his head in the direction of the sound. The thick trees blocked him from seeing whoever was approaching, but soon enough they came into the clearing, causing Regulus to scowl when he saw who it was.

The person continued walking, completely unaware of Regulus standing mere feet away and making Regulus’ blood boil. Why couldn’t he have one moment of peace?

“Potter. What are you doing here?” Regulus snapped, hoping his expression conveyed how unhappy he was with what was happening.

James Potter staggered in his steps as he looked up, eyes and mouth wide with surprise. He looked like he'd seen a ghost—which, to be fair, he basically did. Regulus hadn’t seen James or his brother or any of their friends in almost a year and a half now, not since his birthday party last June.

Regulus scowled even harder at the memory, surely exuding waves of anger and bitterness. He raised a brow when James kept gawping at him, already tired of the conversation. The idiot hadn’t even spoken a word and Regulus was done. That had to be a record.

“Potter,” he repeated, this time more sternly to snap the other boy out of his stupor.

“Oh,” James breathed gently, “it’s you.”

[rothjuje]

Truth. I am feeling done with my SAHM days. I don’t know if it’s having twins (one deeply feeling kid and the other on the spectrum). Or just that I started staying home with my kids as a foster parent in 2015 (so managing extreme toddler emotions full time for 8 years). There are also other lifestyle changes that contribute, living somewhere without ‘help’ (my neighbor in TX used to come keep me company for two hours every morning, it was more companionship than actual help but it meant a lot to my sanity), and also that my husband has been traveling twice the amount that he did in TX.

We got an email saying there was a severe staffing shortage of paraprofessionals in our school district, especially in the special ed classrooms at the elementary school. A friend told me they would cover full-time tuition for the twins’ preschool, which would be perfect and the hours are the same as a school day.

I immediately applied and haven’t heard back. The man who sent the email, who is doing the interviews/hiring, is unfortunately the same man I had to write the email to this summer when I pulled George from ESY. My email was polite (I am a people pleaser) but it did not make friends and the head of special ed is not nice to me when I bump into her in person (her boss is the one I sent the email to).

Justin thinks it’s a no-go, and it could be. They’d have to put Gen in a different class (because her class is strictly part-time) and they would have George all day (which I don’t think would be a staffing issue with their current setup). I know they have previously scheduled interviews for next week, so maybe they want to get through those first before contacting me, who knows. My friends think I shouldn’t stress about not hearing back because it’s the first week of school/they’re crazy busy.

But also, if they know they have a “severe” shortage of staff, why do they wait to write an email begging for people to apply once school has already started?

Anyway. My plan is once the twins are in school (George in the mornings for a total of 12 hours a week, Gen full days twice a week for a total of 10 hours, so only 5 hours intersect/so 5 hours kidless) to finish my real estate classes and get that ball rolling, because it would be flexible enough to do while they’re still in school part time. Although in reality 5 hours kidless a week isn’t enough time to do much of anything.

My friends don’t get why I don’t just find a full time job somewhere, but I don’t understand how that would work. In Texas, things are designed for that (longer school days, longer aftercare). Here preschool is 9am -2pm, so 5 hours. You can pay a lot of money to drop them off an hour before school starts, and pick them up an hour after school ends, but still you would have to leave your work day at 2:30 to get there in time because there are no jobs out here or in surrounding towns (country living).

Also, summer. I have a kid on the spectrum, I can’t just ship him away to camp. And camps for 3 kids is $$$. I don’t think I’ve really thought about what you do with your kids in the summer while working full time until this very moment. I mean most people do it so it’s doable but wow, stressful..

[meditating-dog-lover]

Fasting and inflammation

3 weeks into me fasting using the 16-8 method, I developed the worst skin flareup I have had in a while. This was back in mid January. For months since then I've been dealing with horrible inflammation, not knowing what the ultimate root cause was.

Besides my severe eczema, I've also been feeling fatigued and burnt out. I cannot go for long walks anymore, I lose energy when walking my dog, I have no energy at work and have forgotten about some assignments I had to do because I was so out of it. Again this started when I began strict fasting.

I love fasting and do not want to stop, but I've been so strict with it. I've been fasting 16-8 for 7 months straight thinking I was doing a great job with taking care of myself. But I fucked up my hormone balance which caused my fatigue and severe skin inflammation.

Extended fasting for women can mess up our hormones, and I know it played a role in my elevated cortisol and fasting blood glucose as well as my estrogen dominance and insulin resistance. I know my cortisol is high and I'm so fatigued as a result.

I set 2 health goals for myself this week - to find condiments that don't have processed oils (I found a really delicious spicy mayo that has avocado oil rather than the usual canola oil that a lot of condiments have) and to fast for 13-11 rather than 16-8. On the days where I go to therapy, my days are pretty long and I get hungry before my sessions. So I normally get these sweet potato puffs or white cheddar popcorn, but I want to look for something minimally processed. Again something with healthy oils.

In this case I'll break my fast at 9 rather than 12. I can have my morning coffee then. But for a snack I'm not sure what to have. Preferably something light. My mom suggested peanut butter and apples, but I don't like apples lol.

There are different fasting schedules and foods I should be eating throughout my cycle. Some weeks I need more calories and carbs and no fasting, others I need to eat less and less carbs/more fats. Women's hormones are cyclical unlike men. Men can get away with strict fasting and low carb, but women need a cyclical fasting pattern and more carbs to support hormone balance. It is more complicated.

I had a midnight snack last night and broke my fast this morning at 9:30. I felt so much better. I woke up and my skin was less inflamed. I didn't even apply steroids (neither to my face nor hands). The redness has subsided by a lot, but I still have some cuts and dryness on my hands. My hands are a bit itchy, but my face is better. The inflamed patches are healing and clearing up. I had a stubborn inflamed spot on my right hand that covered my thumb, thumb knuckle, and inner wrist. Even that has cleared. My hands look "normal" for the first time in several months and I'm so happy.

It would have never occurred to me that strict IF would have contributed to my severe inflammation, but I'm so happy I feel better now. I know an anti-inflammatory diet and good gut health help (I love my aloe juice). But even with that it felt like something was missing. It was my hormone imbalances caused by stress and strict fasting. Stress is another thing I'm going to work on with my therapist, a psychiatrist, and a psychologist for formal autism testing (my mom, sister and I believe I am on the spectrum). But that's a separate issue from my strict intermittent fasting, which is probably the most inflammatory thing I'm doing to myself.

I lost a lot of weight with IF (13 lbs of fat and fat alone, not total weight loss). But I'm sure there is an easier approach that isn't as strict that won't cause fatigue and inflammation.

I would love to continue with my current healthy habits - the anti-inflammatory lifestyle, aloe juice and general gut support, flexible IF, psychological support, and hormone support (I feel the cycling will help with this, but it's a process I will need to get used to). A future goal I can look into is exercise and liver support. I'm also going to the dentist with my mom, but that's much later.

I'll do more research on hormone balancing. But it's a tricky area as I'm not very educated on it. But I'll do enough research in order to support myself.

[certifiedbitch777]

The Concept of Intention

Entry Date: 2/12/2024 2:52pm

Today is Monday, and I'm supposed to be working right now, but everything in my body was fighting me from doing so. I did what I thought was best and called out, and god, am I glad.

I hate my job. I hate corporate culture, but I'm stuck here since this is the only thing that allows me to pay my bills. I would love to just write for a living. I don't care if it's to be an author, creative writer for a magazine, songwriter, or poet - I want any and all of it. It brings me peace.

These past days of trying to break bad habits and being consistent have made me deeply introspect. All I've been pondering is my purpose and what I want my life to look like, and I just end up back in the same spot. 

I want the freedom to express myself. I want the ability to carve out my own daily schedule and to follow the beat of my own drum. I want to be authentic. I want to be happy.

I just want to be happy.

In the world that we currently live in, it almost seems as if those in power are doing their best to prevent this from happening, but it's all I crave. I do my best to find joy in the little things, but it's just not in my nature to settle for crumbs when I know I can and deserve much more.

Over the past 5 years, what I wanted to do and be in life has changed dramatically. I honestly feel like I choose and hyper-focus on a vocation every 2 to 3 months. If I'm being honest, in each sprint, whichever career path I chose was never due to my genuine interest in them. It was all due to social, family, and financial expectations and pressure. 

My interest in all things linked to healthcare and technology was due to my family saying that it would be a reliable source of income. 'There will always be jobs for nurses or cybersecurity.' 'It would be a steady flow of income.' Obviously, my studying in those things lasted only a short time. My reason for indulging in it wasn't sustainable.

I also majored in Psychology for about 2 semesters in college. I actually really love the concept of psychology. The complexity of the human psyche completely fascinates. As much as I loved taking classes on it, I eventually dropped out of college due to my school requiring my broke ass to pay out of pocket because I failed 1 class :|. I was devastated, but a part of me always knew I wouldn't stick with it for long since school was never for me despite my academic success in my younger years. For background, I dropped out in 10th grade and got my GED shortly after my 18th birthday without studying :).

Between all of this exploring, I worked in various retail and warehouse jobs. Honestly, I quit those jobs at the drop of a hat because the pay would never match the stress. One thing I did enjoy was the amount of free time I had. The schedule was flexible, and I could get a lot done in a day or week since I sometimes did double shifts to have more days off. As much as the scheduling for the job was compatible with my dream life, the pay and terrible benefits nowhere near offset the latter.

Last but not least, I currently work at a top corporate company. I got in due to an apprenticeship, and they offered me a full-time offer. I will forever be grateful for that, as I was sure I would be fucked as both a high school and college dropout. They've provided me with stability I could only dream of, along with excellent benefits. However, what makes me not willing to settle for this is the lack of work-life balance I have. I work at least 6 days a week and over 12 hours most days. I have no life, happiness, or drive for anything anymore. It's as if I had to sell and exchange my soul for this life. And now I live the life of a corporate zombie with my world being filled with black and white instead of vibrant colors.

Why am I giving all this context of all my different career changes? Because I was never genuinely intentional with each path I explored. As a result, nothing worked out the way I thought it would. 

I've been applying to random jobs with mid to high salaries for over 2 years now, and I've gotten a rejection for every single one. Although that could be a result of how terrible the job market is, the way I view it, it didn't work out for a reason. It wasn't meant for me, and I only applied to them for superficial reasons, not because I was genuinely interested in them.

I want to be more intentional in everything I do in this life. Whether it's the food I eat, how I present myself, my morals and values, or even the line of work I want to pursue. I want to be the best version of me and only me. 

This is why I want to write for a living. It's been a common denominator in my life since I was as young as 5. I've always loved writing. Whether it was storytelling, music, or even something as simple as journaling, I felt aligned with what I was supposed to be doing. Even when I am blogging to absolutely nobody, I feel happy. I feel fulfilled spreading my truth no matter how ugly or beautiful.

The concept of intentional living was spoken about long before my mother was born. I thought I was doing so, but that couldn't be further from the truth. I challenge and hope that anyone who comes across this post begins the journey of self that will lead to a life of fulfillment.

[bugcatcherwill]

can we have some writing tips, like how are you able to update the RATC fanfic every saturday? with job and etc. in the mix?

Oh boy, do I! So this is general writing tips, but also a window into my process so this might not work for others as well.

Basically I have a loose weekly schedule. I try not to stick to something more rigid because I know who sets the guidelines (me) and that person is full of shit.

The weekly schedule goes a bit like this: Early in the week, come up with what events I want to write for this current chapter and start drafting the general layout. Middle of the week is where the bulk of the writing happens. And then the Fridays are usually reserved for editing and touchups. Basically I try to have it all written or mostly written by Thursday so I don't force myself to scramble together that week's chapter. Saturday morning, I give it another few read-throughs for last minute editing and post it to AO3 in the afternoon.

What's important is that you make the most of your time while not-writing. They say 10% of a writer's job is actually writing and 90% of it is thinking about writing - and that couldn't be more correct. The amount of plot hooks that just...came to me while driving or in the shower is too many to count. And being away from that monolithic, sterile Google Doc REALLY helps clear your mind. Basically before I sit down and start my chapter, I make sure I have a gameplan of what I want to write first, so I'm not just floundering when I actually have some free time to write.

A big tip I have is find out what's the best way to write for your current schedule/comfort zone. Most of my writing I do on my phone. Seriously. I'm one of those freaks lmao. But I found out it's so much easier to avoid distractions of Youtube, Discord, Social Media, when all I have is my phone screen in front of me and I have to actually switch apps to distract myself. It also lets me do a bit of writing when there's a lull at my job, or when I'm on the exercise bike at my house.

So, yeah, a big part of what allows me to make these weekly updates is that time management, but also I've pretty much blocked so much of my story either in my head or in a Google Doc that writing it out thankfully doesn't feel like a chore :)

Also another tip: as much as you might hate outlines, you're probably gonna have to make an outline at some point. I, for one, HATE outlines. But I found a way to make my outlines a lot less unbearable.

What you do, is you don't write out your entire story's plan from the get-go. Because doing so makes it a LOT harder to squeeze in some plot point that you just came up with in the shower and you REALLY wanna put in there, but the outline says you can't. Outlines are like post-its. They're a good reminder, but you shouldn't be afraid of ripping them off the wall when you no longer need them - because that's what they're meant for.

I actually have two outlines that I use: the macro-outline and the micro-outline. The Macro-outline is basically just a bullet-point list of the major story beats I plan to have. Nothing too structured, nothing too complex, just a list of the big events and plot hooks. Then the micro-outline only goes over the next 2-3 chapters. It allows me to block out the actual chapters before I write them, and lets me look at the general story of those snippets and go "is that what I want to do?"

This, I feel, gives me a lot more flexibility in the story. Since if I come up with a plot hook I'd like to add, I can add that into the Macro-outline list, and then think about where I want to place that in the general timeline of events.

This is a bit of a wall of text, but I hope this helps! :D

[hcolleen]

So, a new post and a bit of a backstory:

I've got a lovely (*snark*) case of fibromyalgia which limits my energy (it falls under the chronic fatigue/ME family) so that if I work at home, I max out at ~10hrs/week, but if I try to work outside the home, I can only do ~4hr on a very good week, but those hours (both sets) are rather unpredictable. I can wake up one day and be fine and the next day I feed the cat and go back to bed for 4hrs because I just can't stay awake and there's no real way to predict those days. My cat, the lovely Mr Aziraphael, helps me by getting me to exercise (by games of 'you can't get me') and by companionship and snuggles (I had a dr write a script for him as a therapy cat). (also, the only people I'd wish this on are people who make it hard to get disability and want to eliminate it so they understand why it's needed....though, trying to teach them compassion is maybe a losing proposition)

That said, I do currently work for a commercial real estate agent doing data entry, email design, web updates, and the like for him. He's not had a lot of work for me (the past 2 weeks, I got about 1.5hrs) but he said he has more coming up. I've been looking for another job that I can work on a flexible schedule to fill in what I need since November, but haven't had an interview since mid-January despite applying to several things on ZipRecruiter and LinkedIn.

So, all that being said, I really am short on money right now. I have ~$12 and my bills right now come to $120 which needs to be paid by the 5th, with an additional ~$60 to get enough food and litter for ~4 months delivered. My ko-fi is linked in my bio and any help is greatly appreciated.

I hate to ask...so, here is the cat tax:

[t-am-i-the-asshole]

AITA for expecting my boyfriend to do all the chores while I work 2 jobs and go to school full-time?

Not enough info

My boyfriend and I are in our 20s and we’ve been living together for a couple years now, we have a really good relationship and communicate well, I think this is just a matter of we both have a lot on our plates but any input is welcome.

I’m currently working 2 jobs, 5 days a week. I’m also a full-time student, so my other 2 days are taken up with being at school for 10-12 hours. I’m in my senior year of my degree as well so it’s a heavy course load and I’m also applying to grad school and internships at the moment. All 7 days of my week are occupied with either work or school, and I have to wake up between 5-7 am everyday. I’m barely home, but when I am home it’s spent doing homework, eating, and sleeping.

My boyfriend finished his degree a couple years ago and he is working full time, 4 days a week. Outside of that, he goes to the gym about 5 days a week, every Friday night he goes bowling with his friends, and a couple days a week he plays a card game with his friends.

At the start of the semester, we agreed that he would take on most of the chores, but I would help when I can and I’d still help with dinner because I enjoy cooking. He sometimes complains about having to do the chores and will ask me to help out with things here and there such as cleaning the cat’s litter, and I’ll do it. We both hate cleaning honestly so I get it’s annoying, but I’m starting to feel frustrated when he expects me to help with more chores.

In my eyes, we agreed on this beforehand and he was completely okay with supporting me. He also has 3 days a week that he gets to sleep in and he’s able to go the gym and have hobbies. I’ve been stressed because I don’t even have the time or mental capacity to make doctors appts that I need, and I had to stop going to the gym a couple months back. I don’t have the luxury of having time for myself, not to mention my body is physically sore as both my jobs also require me being on my feet all day.

We split the bills evenly, I also have car payments hence why I needed a second job to help cover it. One of my jobs is also relevant to my field and I need it for my resume.

-My schedule is my choice to an extent, I’m going into a career in healthcare and the current school load is required, I don’t have any flexibility there.

-I work 40-45 hrs a week, he works 40.

-As someone said, we both see it as him supporting me towards my goals, and ultimately we want a life together, it was an agreement for our future.

-We do errands together, I still help with dishes and laundry regularly. I’m cleaning the floors this weekend and he asked for help cleaning the bathrooms as well.

AITA for getting frustrated that he expects me to help with housework too or am I putting too much on his plate? Does this sound balanced/fair?

[steamishot]

end of january

time tends to feel like it flies by in LA, but the days feel more painful and long in NYC. whenever i have too much time to myself, i tend to ruminate and get stuck on negative thoughts. all the interviews in the past few months that i was hoping would work out for matt, have not come to any fruition. UCI, UCLA, city of hope are most likely a no. LA general/USC is a slight maybe - they are "thick in interview season" and do not have an answer yet. kaiser woodland hills seems to be a malignant program that hires new grads and has them basically work a brutal schedule (5-6 days off a month only, flip flops between nights and days).

sometimes i am more compassionate and patient, because i understand matt is trying really hard and the job market is just extremely competitive. but there are many other times that i have a lot of anger about this whole situation and can as an AH move direct it at him/place the blame on him. recently R&T who just moved here last september has informed us that T has been job searching again, and he received an offer in dallas that they're seriously considering. my pathologist friend L is finishing up her fellowship and she received an offer both in socal and norcal - like she received 2 offers out of 2 in person interviews. i know objectively it's easier for T to land a new job (data science, lower paying), and for L to secure jobs because she's highly specialized, but it's also difficult not to compare their success to our behind the scenes.

TP who is also an INTP like matt and have similar qualities about decision making, shared that it took her a year of job searching (while currently holding a job) to select one that makes the most sense. it did really help to hear things from her perspective, that although i find it tough by association, the person doing the interviewing and being rejected is by far taking the brunt of these difficult situations.

i'm really trying my best to be supportive of all this, instead of focusing on things out of my control. i think the most challenging aspect for me to accept is that we're at the prime age to settle down but there is no plan forward yet.

i could be angry at medicine, at how unfair it is after so many years of training (in a location that is not your choice) you can still end up in a malignant situation, how no one really cares for doctors' work conditions because they "make too much money" and there continues to be abusive/predatory environments even as an attending physician. or i could be grateful for all that this career offers us, in terms of opportunities, fulfillment, respect, job security and financial stability.

yoga: in these past 12 days, i will have completed 10 yoga classes (5 at tangerine and 5 at equinox). this is the most i've ever done consistently. it's useful to switch up the instructors, because most of the ones i went to before did not provide hands on assistance or tell me if i was doing a pose wrong. i purchased a yoga strap to practice flexibility at home!

broadway: this month, we watched hadestown, sweeney todd and moulin rouge. both hadestown and moulin rouge were amazing seats; our seats for sweeney todd were OK but we could not see the actors faces/emotions due to distance. i would rank hadestown > sweeney todd > moulin rouge. i actually left moulin rouge with a headache that lasted a few hours because the music was so loud and everything was so flashy lol

bedsheets: as part of lifestyle creep, we upgraded our duvet insert to MUJI down duvet and got a matching washed cotton duvet cover to match the rest of our ensemble. it was on sale for 40% off. i've been dreaming of doing this for like 3 years now haha so it is a worthwhile mention. i'm not sure yet if it is better than the $30 duvet insert from amazon that we've been sleeping with the last 3 years. i realize i am emotionally attached to our last duvet so it'll take time to get used to this new one.

[playbillionaire]

Down in the Cheap Seats

How to get more affordable theatre tickets in New York City. Here’s the same post on my Substack!

I’m not a professional, but I have been lucky enough to be attending theatre in the tri-state area my whole life, so here’s everything I know to help anyone who wants to get into seeing theatre without spending too much.

The trick of seeing great theatre without skipping a meal is to look beyond Broadway. Theatre tends to be more fluid than its marketing- almost all of the winners of the Pulitzer Prize for Drama in the 21st century have premiered in smaller (more accessible) venues. Staying informed and being willingly to go outside of the usual Broadway houses is the best way to see theatre at affordable prices, and possibly catch new shows before they head to Broadway.

Here’s a couple of link that are good to know:

Playbill Weekly Schedule of Broadway Shows- A current schedule of the showtimes of every show currently running on Broadway. Shows are typically dark on Monday, but since the pandemic, schedules have changed and matinees have been added during the weekends, so it’s good to check which matinees are 2pm and which are 3pm, in case you want to try multiple lottos each day.

Playbill Broadway Rush, Lottery, and Standing Room Only Policies- Alphabetical list of all the discount ticket options for Broadway shows

Playbill Off-Broadway Rush and Inexpensive Ticket Policies- Alphabetical list of all the discount ticket options for off-Broadway shows.

Lotteries

When it comes to theatre, I feel that scheduling flexibility saves money. If you can go any time or day, you can snag cheaper tickets. I recommend entering as many lotteries as possible, as frequently as possible. When I was working at my desk job, I tried to make a habit of entering the lotteries every morning after checking my emails. Here’s all of the links to the digital lotteries- they usually email winners around 2, and give them an hour to purchase the tickets, so keep an eye on your email! (I’m not exactly sure why these shows are split up across these lotteries, rather than in one place, but it’s best to just go through all 3). As much as I love in-person rush, anyone with a full time job and commute is probably going to have a tough time getting to the box office when it opens at 10 or hanging around the theatre district hoping to snag a cheap ticket.

Broadway Direct Lottery

Telecharge Lottery and Rush- This requires signing into a social media account (very annoying), but also let’s you submit a lottery for more than one performance at a time

Lucky Seat- This one offers lotteries in several different cities, so make sure you are submitting for the New York performances

Today Tix- Need the app to get tickets, but some really great lotteries if you submit every day, especially for hot ticket Off-Broadway shows.

Discount Ticket Programs

A lot are mentioned in the Playbill article, but to keep everything together, below are my favorite ones that I’ve personally used. When a recent show I had tickets to was cancelled, I was able to check with these programs to get a last minute cheap ticket, so making/maintaining an account ahead of time is a good idea.

LincTix- Lincoln Center Theatre’s program for discount tickets for people between the ages of 21 and 35. With fees, tickets are $35.50 for any show at the 3 Broadway theatres at Lincoln Center. You can also purchase tickets for anyone else with a LincTix account in the same order. Don’t delete the email with your account number in it, you will need it to sign in every time you purchase tickets. Also, seats purchased with LincTix are always great, these are not partial view seats.

Playwrights Horizons Young Membership Discount Tickets- $20 tickets for any show for anyone under 35. You can also purchase $35 tickets for a guest to accompany you. There is also a $10 alternative for full-time students, at the same link. To sign up, you need to create an account and “purchase” a free membership, which will allow you to purchase the discounted tickets from your account. Remember to renew this every season, as it does expire.

2nd Stage Theater 30 Under 30 Discount Tickets- $30 tickets for any show for anyone under 30. When looking at performance dates, enter “30UNDER30” in the promo code window, and eligible seats will show up on the seating chart.

Manhattan Theatre Club 30 Under 35 Discount Tickets- $30 tickets for any show. Registering online allows anyone under 35 to buy 2 tickets per show. The best part is that you can bring a guest of any age- just make sure whoever purchased the ticket picks up the ticket at the box office.

Roundabout Theatre Company HipTix Program- $30 tickets for any show for anyone between the ages of 18 and 40. This program also allows you to purchase 2 tickets for any show, and your guest can be of any age. You’ll receive a promo code in an email that will let you purchase the tickets, and whoever purchased the tickets must pick them up at the box office.

Theatre For a New Audience New Deal Tickets- $20 tickets for any show for anyone under 30, or any full-time student. Enter the promo code NEWDEAL when purchasing tickets and the discount will be applied. Ticket must be picked up at the box office, so bring proof of ID.

Ultimately, it is possible to see theatre in New York City for less than a nice dinner! Having a flexible schedule, entering lotteries, and looking outside Broadway is the best way to do it (also, be under 30 I guess??). Good luck!

[quincywillows]

OKAY going to try and just piggy back onto this with the remaining two answers. thank you for sending good enough ones that my brain just rambled on and on!

12. If a genie offered you three writing wishes, what would they be? Btw if you wish for more wishes the genie turns all your current WIPs into Lorem Ipsum, I don’t make the rules

the Lorem Ipsum threat is actually SO funny lolol. kudos to op for the phrasing on that one. goodness three writing wishes... how to choose...



1. Better natural organizational skills for outlining. I'm not bad at outlining, like I think I do an okay job, but it's so hard when I'm in the brainstorm phase (which I am for a lot of projects at the moment) to like, figure out how to best organize all the thoughts so that the story comes together in the best, most efficient way possible. Rather than having like... 700 different pages for things (you all do not wanna see our S4 AMBITION Notion. It's scary in there lmao). Like the thing is I love love love doing worldbuilding and character examination and all that stuff to build the foundations of a story, but I find one of my biggest friction points in the writing process is that transition from that phase of jotting all the things down to like... having it organized enough to write the thing. This is especially true for series (which basically everything I write is lol 💀), because I like to have as much of the FULL story planned out as possible as I believe that makes for the best, strongest execution in the end. So it can be really hard to know when to make that leap into the next phase.



2. More time set aside outside of the space time continuum specifically to be creative and write. Like, if my genie could grant me... two hours, each day, where time freezes for everyone else but I can just work work work like a little writing bee until I burn out or the clock runs out, and time resumes... gosh I would be so powerful. The productivity I would achieve. The time management improvements that would be had. And if the bonus to this idea would be that I would be guaranteed to be productive during that set aside window of time, then that would be a dream dream.



3. The ideal platform for sharing my stories. I mean this in the most literal sense of like, warehouse of space rather than the social media meaning of "platform." This is getting a bit #personal for my writing journey lol but I'm very much at a point where I've decided like... I'm going to self-publish but kind of do it in my own way? In a way that isn't the norm, gives me more freedom and flexibility, but still somewhat relies on a community. Like I've been so turned off by mainstream media creators these days (hence my former rant about tv lol but the same applies for the pub world, there's just so much valued in that world and put above things like writing quality and storytelling that I can't stand), but I don't necessarily want to get into the hustle bustle overselling myself vibe that self-pub in conventional routes sometimes has... my sort of dream set-up that I hope I can achieve in the near future is creating a hub of some sorts through a blog (on a like custom-built website, not on Tumblr lol, though I would keep my Tumblr for community purposes) where I basically drop chunks of updates on my ongoing original stories, it's all in one place, and I could have multiple stories running at once. It would be organized behind the scenes (I love a Schedule), but it would have this feeling like... a digital library specifically for my works. And all are welcome, there's no strings attached -- if you like my writing, great! Drop me a kind note or a dollar in a ko-fi, tell your friends, etc. There wouldn't be any pressure to write one genre because it makes money, or include x trope I hate because that'll sell, or feel like I'm taking advantage of my reader base because I need to constantly sell to them or market everything. IDK... maybe it's a pipe dream and only time will tell but my third genie wish would make all of that perfectly apparent to me so I could just jump right in without having to build the skeleton for the library myself first.



(I guess if what's described above sounds remotely like something you'd follow as a reader in general, not necessarily of me but as a type of platform, let me know because the encouragement would be v helpful right now as I am thinking about these things lol. Anyway sorry sensitive part over back to ur regularly scheduled writer grrl blogging)

14. Do you lend your books to people? Are people scared to borrow books from you? Do you know exactly where all your “lost” books are and which specific friend from school you haven’t seen in twelve years still possesses them? Will you ever get them back?

absolutely! i'm not at all precious about physical copies of books. in fact i'm kind of particular about what books i actually have on my shelf -- in a decluttering phase of my life a couple years ago i went through all of them and decided i only wanted books on my shelf that i genuinely loved or meant something to me at a specific time. so i don't necessarily have a ton of books TO share, but i wouldn't bat an eye if a friend asked. don't think i have any actively out in the wilderness right now though.

5, 10, 12 & 14 for the writing asks?

thank you so much for sending some! 😊 i'm glad y'all are alive out there even though i am not half the time lol (and my apologies dear tumblr followers)

5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

oh hmm... i don't know that i do? the only thing that comes to mind off the top of my head that's kind of the opposite of a superstition is that i don't believe writer's block is a thing lol. like i do think that the symptoms of it are real and challenging (we all have phases where the sheer act of writing feels insurmountable, for one reason or another, often many little reasons cobbled together that creates a blanket feeling of "can't"), and i don't discount that, but i don't think the actual existence of a condition called writer's block is a thing. i think it's often a convenient band-aid we authors use to excuse ourselves for not writing for a day... or two days... or a week... etc., because oh we have writer's block we can't, when in actuality most times if you just sit down and push out a sentence or two, even if it's garbage and you'll have to cut it later, that helps and makes you feel 100x better than not writing at all due to a flimsy excuse.that being said, i do think i believe in the opposite idea of like... a writing Zone so to speak. like any kind of good exercise, i do think when you settle into writing and work at it consistently for a handful of time, at some point about 30 minutes in if the words are wording you enter a zen, flow state that is basically The Writing Zone. some of your best work can come from this and most importantly, you cover a lot of ground which brings you closer to your end goals for whatever the project is (or just does some writer brain decluttering if you're not working on a set project but want to be creative, which is equally important sometimes. i think of this kind of writing as like flossing my brain lol). the zone is rare to achieve, but so satisfying when it comes through.

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

gosh i love the concept of this, like a scene or piece being so impactful (whether because it's beautiful, or painful, or so blisteringly relatable or specific to you as a reader at that moment) that it sticks with you for a long time after... i don't think being haunted by a piece necessarily has to be bad either. haunting kind of has an inherent dark connotation to it, because of death, but i think being haunted by writing can be from a piece that was positive too -- it's just that the emotional stamp it left on you doesn't ebb so easily.i'm trying to think about if a piece of writing i've consumed specifically has ever hit me that way and still stuck with me, but considering nothing is immediately jumping to mind i would have to say no... at least for the moment. from my own writing i don't know that i've necessarily hit this benchmark yet either, organically speaking, but there have been a couple of scenes while working on AMBITION that left an indelible mark on me from writing them (the entirety of season 2 episode 10 could count towards this actually, as well the zc scene from 208. those are what always immediately jump to mind). i also have a handful of scenes or imagery from my current finished novel, Quincy Willows (ayeee shout out url) that i'm quite proud of and that evoke a specific feeling for me... i wouldn't call it haunted, necessarily, but just... a warm presence in my mind.i'm optimistic about works i have up my sleeve in the future as well to have some moments like this in store -- i have no idea if my writing has ever haunted anyone to this day yet, hahaha, but time will tell!

[nordic-language-love]

Hi there! I'm thinking of starting tutoring on italki but I'm super nervous about it and would love to hear how you've been finding it. I have a TESOL qualification and currently tutor kids in-person as a casual job, but I want more experience (and also would love to supplement my income a bit).

Is it difficult/time-consuming creating lesson plans for each student? Are there any tips you have about lesson prep? What was the biggest challenge you faced when you first started out?

Sorry this is a lot of questions f(^_^;

Hi! Sorry for the slow response - I had a LOT to say about this! I'm gonna put it under a read more because it got far too long lmao

Teaching on italki is very rewarding in my experience. That's not to say it's a breeze all the time, but I have more good experiences than bad for sure. There's a huge market for teaching children English on italki too, so if that's your specialisation then you should be able to get plenty of classes (note that Chinese parents are unable to book classes listed as kids classes bc it's illegal in China to seek online tutors for children under 12, but that doesn't stop them by any means lol).

When I first started I struggled a lot because I had no experience, no idea how to plan lessons and no bank to pull on. Nowadays it's less time-consuming because I already have a lot of my own materials, so I can reuse them or tweak them slightly and I don't make as many things from scratch. But I'm always updating my material as I learn what works and trying to improve my lessons, so it's still time-consuming (but a lot of that's due to my poor time management skills rather than it actually taking that long to put together a lesson plan). It depends on what kind of teacher you are though; many teachers just focus on conversation practice and don't have many (or any) materials at all.

I'd say my biggest challenge though was not knowing how to pitch my lessons at the right level. I ended up subscribing to Linguahouse to get worksheets (which I normally use as starting points for creating my own lesson plans rather than using the worksheets themselves) so that I had more of an idea of what I was doing. Engoo is also a good website for finding news articles suitable for B1-B2 level students (they claim to be up to proficient level, but honestly I think even their level 10 articles are C1 at best). Again, I mostly use it for reference or if I have lots of lessons to plan and I need something quick (because using free resources that students can look up themselves feels a bit cheeky to me).

Some general tips:

1) You'll want to set your prices low to start with. It doesn't matter how much experience you have offline; when people are browsing profiles, they'll see only see the number of lessons you've taught on the platform. You can increase them quite quickly, but remember that number of lessons really counts when people are making a decision choosing a tutor.

2) Because your prices are low, you're going to get some shitty students at first. By that, I mean you get students who aren't prepared to do the work but expect to become fluent in 2 weeks because they're ~PaYiNg FoR a TuToR~. They never last long. Just give them the best lesson you can, be as encouraging and enthusiastic (but also realistic) as possible and wait for them to drop off.

3) Be prepared to be a little flexible with your schedule to start with. I said I wasn't going to work after 4pm or before 6:30am and Tuesday would be my day off. I then ended up teaching 6am-9pm on Tuesdays. After a while, I concluded that teaching before 7am just wasn't for me, and it certainly wasn't something I wanted to do regularly, so I took those slots off my calendar. I also found Wednesdays weren't a popular day, so I made that my day off and now I stick to it. If I'd stuck to my original plan, I wouldn't have a lot of my current students. (This is the problem with working for yourself: on paper you get to set your own hours, but in practice you have to work whatever hours gets your the most customers).

4) Plan breaks in your calendar. You need food and bathroom trips, as well as time to recharge your brain! Some people leave their calendar completely open and then remove slots as they get booked up (e.g. if they're teaching 1-3:30pm and then 4-6pm, they might remove 3-3:30 from their calendar to make sure they get a break in that time). I prefer to have them already pre-planned so I don't have to update my schedule every day. Either way, don't let yourself wind up teaching for 6 hours on the trot.

5) Do not assume that the language level on their profile corresponds to their actual level! Some people list themselves as A1 despite being C1/C2, and some people list themselves as native speakers despite being barely A2. If they say they're B1/B2 then that's more accurate, but it still doesn't help much because those levels are so broad. I always send them a message asking about their goals/current level (sometimes their response is less than helpful, but usually you'll get some idea of what they want.)

6) Use the trial lesson to assess their level, but make sure it's not just a needs assessment. I watched a bunch of "how to run a trial lesson" videos on Youtube, and lots of them were just like "interrogate your student about their English level and studies" and while that's all important and good information, your students are much more likely to rebook if you give them a demonstration of what your lessons are like. I usually plan a trial lesson based on what the student's goals etc are. If they don't respond to my message or don't give me enough information, my trial lesson looks like this:

Start with general pleasantries/introductions and a little small talk (how are you? How is your week? What's the weather like?)

I then ask them why they want to improve their English, a bit about how they study at the moment (do they read books? Watch TV shows?) and what do they find most difficult/want to improve most. I also ask how they prefer to be corrected (should I interrupt them or wait until the end of class?)

I tell them I want to assess their level so I know what our starting point is. I then bring up a PDF with 4 pictures related to either the city (if I think they're low B1 or lower) or sleep (if I think they're high B1+) and ask them to describe their pictures. I might prompt them to say more (what season do you think it is? What time of day is it? Why do you think that? Where are those people going? What are they wearing?) I always try to suggest one or two words they could use so that they feel like they learned something.

The next slide is agree/disagree statements (e.g. it's better to live in the country than the city), and we discuss the statement and what we think. (I'm actually going to update this so it's more like advantages/disadvantages questions because I've noticed that some people don't like discussing their opinions. It's a big part of the IELTS test though, which is kinda what I based it on to start with).

Then I ask them if they have any questions/what else they would like to do in classes. I leave at least 5 minutes for this part.

If I have time left over, I ask them what they'll do later/for the rest of the week and just make a little small talk about that.

7) Keep a document with details about your students. Because you will forget shit (especially if you have students with the same name/other similar details), and it doesn't look very good if you forget for the third lesson in a row what they do for a living or where they live. It also helps you keep track of what you've studied and what resources you've used with each student so that you don't end up redoing exercises you've already done.

8) Google docs are great! Start one for each student and use it to keep track of new vocabulary, corrections and homework (if you choose to set it - not everyone wants it, and it's extra work for you to do too. I only set it if people ask for it).

9) People might offer to pay you outside of italki. This would mean more money because italki isn't then taking a 15% commission, but it's against italki's policy and I never do for fear of being caught (eg if I have a dispute with a student who's started paying me outside of italki, they could report me to italki and I'd get banned from the platform). Of course, you can do what you like! But if you get asked and would prefer not to take the risk, here's what I say:

"Thanks for the offer, but I prefer you booking the lessons through italki. It helps me keep track of all my lessons. Also, I hope to work in a school someday, and it will help a lot if I have a high number of lessons taught on my italki profile. I'm very happy that you offered though!"

10) Check out other people's videos on youtube about how they run their classes and what tips they have. Not all of them will apply to you - you have to figure out your own style! - but it's good to have some ideas. I really like English Teacher Ryan's videos.

11) Don't bullshit if you don't know something. Just say you're not sure, but you'll look it up and get back to them. Chances are your students will find grammar loopholes and complications you never knew English had and will come to you asking why this person used the past simple when according to your last lesson it should have been a present perfect etc.

12) If you're teaching grammar, revise it before the lesson. And revise it from lots of different resources too, because different resources will say different things, and you want to know that grammar inside out.

Okay, I think that's enough of an essay now! I hope some of it was helpful 😅 Good luck! I'm sure you'll be awesome 😊

[guerrerajaguar]

Head Canons: Business trip

You would love to go on business trips, since you adored traveling and getting to know new places.

Although you would prefer to have your husbands tag along, they were busy with their own jobs not adjusting to the trip schedule.

More often Akaza would travel with you, since he entirely works from home and being a freelancer gave him a lot of flexibility on his working hours.

Your husbands did not fancy the idea of you being away from them even for just the weekend, but they were understanding and proud that the company considered you a very skillful and valuable asset.

As soon as they found out, Akaza would start complaining about how much he was going to miss you, so much that he might probably die.

He will be bear hugging you every opportunity he had, especially from behind, almost lifting you from the floor.

-”Why does it have to be you? Can’t they send Kyojuro?” He will complain with a grin, since you and Kyo worked together.

-”No, because he works in a different area and this is directly related to my position” You would say while grabbing his chin to kiss him, making his complains stop.

-”Aghhh, that is not fair game. That only makes me miss you more”.

-”Darling, it's only for 3 days. I’ll be back before you notice it. I promise”. You will conclude by tenderly booping his nose making him shower your face with kisses.

Giyuu will help you get your bags ready, wanting to plan ahead for every possible climate change.

-”Love, I think you are traveling really light this time. Wouldn’t you be cold? or What about rain? Here, you should take this.” He will offer you a really cute coat that he gifted you on Valentine’s day.

-”Uh… Yes, you are probably right, baby. Let me pack it up as well” You actually did not think that you were going to need it, but how could you say no to your handsome blue eyed husband?

When your bags were done, he would then grab your hand for you to sit beside him and will cup your cheeks with his hands to kiss you deeply in the lips.

-”I am really going to miss you.” He will confess while gently stroking your cheek with his thumb. You will automatically hug him, since you found him so irresistibly adorable.

-”I won’t be away for that long and I need you to help me keep Akaza and Kyojuro at peace”.

-”I will keep an eye on them. Y/N… Could you, brush my hair?” Giyuu will say with a visible blush in his face, even after being married he kept being really shy about asking for affection.

He will then sit at the edge of the bed, eyes closed, loving how your hands caressed his hair and enjoying every single moment the two of you were alone.

Kyojuro will prepare your favorite food for dinner as a goodbye present, he will be more cheerful than the other 2 husbands but only because he did not wanted you to feel bad for your business trip.

You will help him in the kitchen, joking around, preparing food for all, while stealthily stealing kisses from him; standing on your tiptoes.

Kyojuro will then trap you against one of the kitchen counters and will softly whisper to your ear:

-”How is it possible that you are not gone yet, but I already miss you this much?” He will say with a smile as he brushes your hair back.

-”I’ll be back really soon, sweetheart. Please take care of Giyuu and don’t let Akaza get the worst out of you, please”. You will ask with a grin while you eskimo kiss him.

-”I will, love, rest assured.” He will kiss your hand and tenderly embrace you.

The next day, the 3 of them will drop you at the airport and each will say goodbye with a kiss.

They will text you in your group chat as soon as you boarded your plane and will ask you to let them know as soon as you landed.

You will send them selfies of you while eating and pictures of your hotel room to let them know what it looked liked. Each answering back with selfies of their current activities.

Akaza will send you private messages of how much he is missing you, trying to blackmail you with the saddest expressions he managed to send selfies of.

Giyuu and Kyojuro will send you messages in the group to let you know that everything at home is just fine. They all played a couple of UNO and Exploding Kittens matches.

You will complete your assignments and go back home safe and sound to find your 3 husbands waiting for you at the arrival gate.

After picking you up, you will all go to have dinner at Kyo’s fave restaurant since last time you went to Giyuu’s favorite place.

You will then tell them how pretty the city was, how good your coworkers treated you while being there and how much you have missed them all.

You will then go back home to take a warm bath, joined by Kyojuro and then prepare to sleep with Akaza since that night was his to have you.

My Devoted Husbands - Fic / Head Canons