#an impatient existence
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Today's featured song is: "Shouzon" by EZFG feat. Saki!
#vocaloid#vocaloid song of the day#song of the day#vocaloid songs#synth v#synthesizer v#synthv#synth v songs#synthesizer v songs#saki#saki ai#saki synth v#synth v saki#saki synthezier v#shouzon#shouzon song#an impatient existence#EZFG#EZFG vocaloid#vocaloid EZFG#Youtube
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We ARE going to bring up Captain Amelia. You have good taste! GOOD TASTE I SAY! *aka I just rewatched Treasure Planet and got hit with, "Oh yeahhhhh... that explains a lot!"*
honestly, the Meg/Jasmine/Amelia trifecta tells you 90% about me as a person. (the rest is covered by Sailor Jupiter and Sailor Uranus and, uhhh, I'll stop baring my soul to the world now)
and speaking of Amelia, this is tangential, but like -- there's one Twst comic I have been kicking at for a while where I needed an RSA sports/flight teacher and, uh, well
someday I will wrangle this stupid comic into coherency and she'll get to make an appearance (in the background of a single panel, half-obscured by a tall hat) (but I will know she's there and that's the important thing)
#art#twisted wonderland#twst oc#my plan worked i've tricked you all into looking at my anime catgirl oc#she exists to yell at some rsa boys so she doesn't really have like. a character or story or anything. sorry!#(her name is alexandria north and that is what she considers a sporty outfit. that's as far as i got)#this is the one that is mainly about silver and neige having a mutual bluebird friend and i am having terrible trouble making it not suck#which given some of the stuff i post should tell you something about how it's going so far#(it's just kind of an incoherent mess of ideas at this point. nothing specific just ~the creative process~)#maybe the rest of episode 7 will give my brain the kickstart it needs. depends on how that goes i guess#god. the next episode 7 bit drops in (probably) just a few days.#I'M NOT READY#i have simultaneously never been ready and always been ready#i exist in a perpetual state of impatience
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[The Forgotten Land Roleswap: Chapter Two, 44]
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#when the warp star hits heehee#Elfilis has never seen such a strange object but everyone else with them is just gonna gloss past that#they don’t realize giant cartoon glowing shooting stars don’t exist in this world too but that’s ok :P#one page update because I’m impatient with myself!!!! where’s za warudo to freeze time for me to make comics!!??#king dedede#meta knight#Elfilis#waddle dee#forgotten land roleswap#kirby and the forgotten land#kirby series#Kirby au#Kirby comic#art#roleswap comic
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Dylan O'Brien for Ami Paris 2023
#dylan o'brien#dylan o'brien ami paris#ami paris spring summer 2023 campaign#ami paris#dylan does modeling#model era dylan#I needed these and was impatient#I'm working on some of the smaller frames#but the video quality drops and it makes for worse gifs#but the laugh one needs to exist... so I'm doin it#trashy gifs
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Before I forget! Again! Here's White Kyurem's ref :D
#mod#pokeask#pokeask blog#ask-impatient-samurott#jean kyurem#reference#black kyurem is not relevant to the story will only appear in these next couple of posts as an undefined silhouette#apologies black kyurem fans#his importance is minimal but not non existant lol
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i wonder why bottom!gale seems to be a foreign concept in this fandom mmmm
#i’m biased i just think austin should be the bottom no matter the fandom#but i guess people like the pretty boy is always the top pipeline more?#before anything else i do not intend to mischaracterise his character as gale#who only bottoms because he’s pretty#but i’m impatient i need to see more of gale bottoming#and that’s why this side blog even exists cackles
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mitsukou stans winning with this chapter
they’re on a date!!!
and yet kou’s in denial not even 5 mins later
#lets ignore the angst at the end for now#angst who? they dont exist rn#they’re on a date!! they blush!#I usually wait for rof-scans’ translation but I’m impatient I wanted to read the new chapter already lol#mitsukou#sousuke mitsuba#kou minamoto#tbhk#toilet bound hanako kun#doggo rambles
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Ok I'm posting for accountability, to myself: Today I need to sleep a lot, and make a lesson plan I've been super avoiding, and go to an organizing meeting I want to stay coherent and calm at, but in between? In between I can try starting at least one of the five DFF fanfiction ideas hippity hoppitying around my brain. I really think, if I'm trying to rest my brain, one of the kindest ways to do that is to ease some of the intensity of what's happening in there about these terrible 20yos. Just untangle some of the rubber bands from the ol' rubber band ball so to speak. See I am not in a place where I should try to do words. But I'm gonna.
#i have so many ridiculous ideas and i have to promise myself to post them all anonymously#to even think about starting them#because they're very silly#but i want them to exist#need them to exist even. possibly#as long as i do some good responsible sleeping... then perhaps#dear diary#nobody else is writing pheenew and teenon yet. im waiting. tapping my imaginary wristwatch impatiently. but its not happening#so i mUST produce mediocre anon fic#i have no choice
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<previous - next>
#Erenville#WoL x Erenville#Final Fantasy XIV#FFXIV#Viera#miqo'te#X'vahl Tia#He'll keep the outfit but he's dying it dark green probably.#He has a favorite color and by gods he sticks to it.#Inspired by me finally finishing these custom deliveries#(because I forgot they existed)#also inspired by me wanting to smash them together like dolls and make them kiss lol#(in broad daylight even! egads! What will the people think?)#(Erenville made absolutely sure nobody would be within eye/earshot first)#I should wait to post this until Valentines Day but I'm impatient so... no.#Happy Valentoine's Day#except early I guess.
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"What are you thinking about?"
The question startles you - lost in your own head, you push off the railing, blinking down at the ocean waves as they roll beneath the icy dock.
Merry leans her hip against the railing at your side, crossing her arms as she waits for your answer.
"I don't know," you admit, avoiding her gaze. "Thinking about… something I can't quite remember," you say slowly, staring down at your hands.
That gets a noncommittal sound out of her. She turns to look out over the water, too, folding her hands in front of her, her elbows pressed against the railing.
"The sea does that to you," she says then, and you both lapse into silence, the docks swaying beneath you, the sky darkening overhead as the sun sets over the horizon.
Merry slides closer to you after a while, leaning against you, and you glance over at her to see her fidgeting with the ring hanging from her neck. She catches your eye, quickly tucking the ring back beneath her shirt and turning away.
"What are you thinking about?" you prompt, and it just gets you an annoyed look.
"Come on. It's getting late," she snaps, ignoring your question, and you sigh, pushing off the railing and following after her as she leads you from the docks and back into the city proper.
You move through back streets and dark alleys, keeping your head down as Merry guides you back to the shoddy inn you're staying in. You haven't run into any soldiers just yet, but you're not willing to push your luck. It's bad enough as it is.
Back at the inn, the others are already turned in for the evening, though you do check in briefly with Lea before making your way to your own room. There's not much else to do - you're meant to be laying low, hiding out in this shitty port city and avoiding the parade of soldiers passing up along the coast. But you're getting rather restless - and so is everyone else, for that matter.
You let out a long sigh, reluctantly preparing for bed, and it's a few more hours still until you are able to fall asleep, tossing and turning in your bed, listening to the distant ocean waves outside.
You don't get to sleep for long, though. A pounding on your door wakes you up, and you intend to ignore it, burying your face in your pillow - but minutes pass, and it doesn't stop.
"What the fuck," you hiss, throwing off your blankets and stomping across the room.
You rip the door open, scowling out into the hallway to see Merry.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" you snap, but she just shoves her way through the door, shouldering past you and stopping short in front of your fireplace.
For a despairing moment you think she might be drunk - but when she looks back over at you she is very clearly not, her eye sharp as she glares at you.
"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you!" she jabs a finger at you, and you just raise your hands, bewildered at her anger.
There's a sudden uncertainty that flickers across her face then, and she drops her hand, blinking over at you, taking a step back and shaking her head. You wait for her to say something - but she doesn't, instead turning back around to stare into the fire.
"What do you want, Merry?" you prompt, a little gentler this time, though your agitation is still apparent - you can't help it. When she still doesn't say anything, you begin to feel a little less forgiving.
"Merry." You take a step towards her, your voice hard. "Gods, you always do this," you scoff then, and that gets her to at least look at you again.
"How are you going to come in here like this and still stonewall me?"
"What were you thinking about earlier? At the docks?" she says after a long moment.
You blink, stunned into silence at the absurdity of it.
"What - Merry, I told you," you shake your head, running your hand over your face. "Is that what this is about? Have you just been stewing about that all night? I wasn't thinking about anything."
"I was thinking about you," she says softly, and you're stunned back into silence again, but only for a moment, before your anger returns.
"Yeah? Not Ronan?"
You think she's going to hit you for that, and maybe you'd deserve it.
"No. Ronan…" she starts, seems to consider her words for a moment - and then she does lunge at you, grabbing the front of your shirt, both of you staggering across the room until you bump into the corner table. But she stops short of anything else, just staring at her hands, at the straining fabric bundled in her fists.
"Ronan," she starts again, her voice tight, "I'm not ready to talk about Ronan yet."
That's the most she's ever even said about it - you still don't even know who Ronan is. Or was. Important enough to get their name tattooed on her neck, though. For her to still wear a ring around her neck. Merry drops her gaze then, and you reach up to put a hand over one of hers, her grip loosening on your shirt.
"I was thinking about you. What's going to happen when all of this is over," she says slowly, and then she lets go of you, pulling her hands back, your own hand dropping back to your side.
You realize then that she's leaving, reaching for the door, and you quickly step after her, grabbing her wrist without thinking.
"Merry, wait-" you barely say her name before she's spinning around, grabbing your shirt again, only this time she pulls you toward her instead of pushing you away, your bodies colliding and pressing together, one of her hands moving to grasp at the back of your neck and urge you even closer. You search her face, watching as she licks her lips, your breaths intermingling before you close the remaining space between you.
The kiss is rough, Merry's hand tightening as your own hands grasp at her hips, both of you tripping over each other as you move towards your bed. Her lips are soft, warm and wet against yours, and she teases you with her tongue, tasting you before she pulls back, dropping down onto the bed and dragging you after her.
You barely manage to catch yourself, hands on either side of her head as she reaches down to pull at your trousers. Your breath hitches as her knuckles brush against your bare stomach, her eye watching your face, your reaction, flicking to your lips as you lean closer.
She lets go of your trousers as you kiss her again, instead slipping her hands beneath your shirt, reaching up and dragging her nails down your back, the sharp pain getting a hiss of pleasure out of you. Merry's lips move against yours, and she swallows the sound with her own, moaning low in the back of her throat as you shift on top of her, your bodies pressed flush together, her heart beating loudly against yours.
She says your name then, turning her head slightly, and you pull back, breathless as you look down at her, her hands still trailing up and down your back, tracing the muscle there, her touch lighter as she skims over old scars. She presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth, one more against the jagged scar along your jaw, and then she takes a deep breath, retracting her hands from beneath your shirt and rolling out from under you, moving to sit on the edge of the bed.
You don't move, your breath caught in your throat, and you expect her to get up and leave then - as abrupt as she had arrived. You're burning under your clothes, her touch still lingering on your back, the prick of her nails no doubt leaving long red lines carved into your skin.
"Merry?" you say softly, sitting back on the bed, and she turns back to look at you over her shoulder, though the look she gives you indecipherable. Her breathing is still a little ragged, and she leans forward for a moment, as if to stand - but instead she lays back on the bed, reaching over to give you a very uncharacteristic kiss, your eyes fluttering closed as she cradles your face in her hands. She pushes you down against the pillows then, straddles your lap, pinning you beneath her with her hand moving to your throat.
You reach up to grab her arm, stroking the soft skin of her inner wrist with your thumb, feeling her pulse jump at the touch. And then the moment passes - whatever weird feeling constricting in your chest is replaced with the very familiar feeling of want as she pushes her weight down on you, her hand tightening around your throat, licking her lips as she leans in close and resumes the earlier urgency between you as if nothing had happened at all.
You can't ignore it later, though, when she thinks you're asleep, extracting herself from your arms and moving to sit on the edge of the bed again. You feel the mattress shift as she stands, hear her move around the room, collecting her clothes you both had enthusiastically discarded earlier. She gets dressed, pulls her boots back on, and then you hear her put a few logs on the fire - before the door opens and closes, leaving you all alone.
#starting a day early because im impatient#i've had these all finished for at least a week now im dying#also i Have to do them in a certain order and this way Lea's snippet will post the same day as their art on patreon#merry harlowe#snippets#the theme this year is Angst i guess if that gives you some warning about how these are going to go#ok nevermind im not filtering these w the mature label tumblr just fucking nukes it out of existance#nsft#will be the new tag
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Happy 3 am someone in my asks ((u know who u are)) wanted to know what kind of animals ethan and wendell would be in the sing universe so i got distracted until now drawing a comic about buster moon meeting a detective under slightly unfortunate circumstances
#idk why im posting abt this instead of sleeping#its bc i want to show ppl but do not have the brain power for properly cropping it at 3 am. thats why#so im being impatient and telling yall it exists w/o showing it yet#anyway ethan isnt allowed in the sneep snorp fanfiction bc she wouldve solved everything far too fast#that and we havent gotten to the scene where the cops are needed yet soooooooo#ramblin
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Huoyan, my Dwarf Monk girlboss. [giggles and kicks my legs] i love her sm
#bg3#baldurs gate 3#i finally dyed her clothes to match her hair but alas im too impatient to get more screenshots XD#[vibrates loudly] SHES SO COOL#i was undecided on whether or not ill use an existing char or make a self insert or make a new oc#but im glad i went with the latter#new blorbo from my brain#nix plays bg3#<- block for spoilers bc idk if ill post any or not yet but i have little self control so#my screenshots#not art#oc: huoyan
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aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
#brain is being weird again. i miss the person i thought you were before i found out how truly truly horrible you are#but that person doesn’t exist! i never met them because they aren’t real!#i just wanna meet my person yk. like yeah i don’t want to be in a relationship bc that sounds exhausting but also#it wouldn’t be exhausting if it was my person. i wanna know someone. i wanna learn how someone works.#i wanna take care of someone and be taken care of without asking.#and like the thing is is i definitely have my people in my friends like i already have them in this way#and i appreciate that so so much which is why i won’t settle for anything less ever again and why i’m no longer actively seeking something#but i really do just miss clicking that well with someone right off the bat. and i know most of it was probably 1) me being lied to and 2)#me trying to make myself palatable for him#but i haven’t felt that truly blatantly appreciated in a long time#i just wish that fate would work a little faster at putting my person into my lap is all#i’m not even gonna say that it doesn’t have to be The Person i’ll end up with and can just be One Of the people along the way#because now that feels like settling and if the universe doesn’t want me to settle then i won’t#and i’m not trying to be impatient because i know that it’ll happen when it’s supposed to and i can’t force anything#i just want it to happen so badly. i want to have my cute love story. i want to have it last longer than a week. in a good way this time.#and i know i vent a lot about this in my tags but this time feels different#i just want what is supposed to happen to happen. and i want to feel comforted knowing that it will.#i just need a sign that it’s gonna happen someday so i don’t lose my mind waiting for it#that i’m in the right place. and i’m right where i’m supposed to be#idk. i just know i don’t deserve to feel alone anymore. especially when i know i’m not.#this feels like a prayer. maybe it is. whatever.#mari is irrelevant
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[Decided to join a community event for once! Or, as much of an event as a drawpile is lol. This was a nice warm-up doodle for me, and I can't wait for the end result!]
Drawpile hosted by @ask-the-royal-absol
Bad End Pokeask AU: Kappa
Kappa learns the truth of what happened during the accident, and now she knows her team's killer. But, before she can do anything with the information, said killer appears and attacks Kappa and her party. And Giant Chasm caves in with her and Kyurem inside.
She wakes up to find herself alive, but mangled. Her right arm completely missing. Looking around, she sees the corpses of her friends. Nema, Jean, Marigold, and Morelet, brutalized and dead on the floor. Another four Pokemon dead.
Kappa can only blame herself for their deaths. They died simply because they associated with her. And now, she might be next. She turns to Kyurem, her only company in the chasm and begs them to protect her from her friends murderer.
Kyurem, practically powerless themselves, can only grant her their ice.
Kappa is left to wander the endless maze of caves below Giant Chasm, near brain-dead due to ice inside of her body. But, a part of her is happy. This is what she always wanted. To know the truth, and be surrounded by hallucinations of the people who love her. She can never be hurt again.
#mod#kappa samurott#pokeask#pokeask blog#ask-impatient-samurott#au#badendpokeaskau#in case you wanted to know kyurems take on things:#my kyurem takes “emotionless husk” and makes it their whole personality#they dont really care about giant chasm caving in or the zombified samurott in there with them#theyre just gonna keep vibing in the cave until reshiram or zekrom decides its time for them to be useful again#theyre pretty content with this existence#not like they have the capacity to feel otherwise rip
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Yknow i was always scared of baking because unlike cooking its very precise and you cant just fuck around and find out. But actually that was wrong and you can fuck around and find out and a lot of the time it ends well
#literally just throw some flour and water in a bowl and add some other things (salt/sugar/egg/butter) if you feel like it#and then cook it at 200c for 15 mins and you get bread. and it tastes good. this is crazy what the fuck#the texture is kind of cakey but the outside is crispy? which is an upgrade to normal bread cause the fancy stuff always hurts my mouth#i think i just made really soft damper or smth#all this time i thought bread was difficult as if i dont live in a beautiful world where damper exists#dont let the sourdough fandom fool you bread is simple and quick and easy#I'm using almost expired instant yeast and plain flour and being too impatient to let it rise and its working out okay so far
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but speech impediments are disabilities. My stutter absolutely prevents me from getting certain jobs, particularly anything that would require me to talk on the phone.
I know people who have lisps that have the same problem; companies don't want you if you're hard to understand! Of course they're not going to say that's why they're not hiring you, but they don't have to say anything. They'll just ghost you.
So the next time you're short or impatient with someone who has a stutter, or a lisp, or any other kind of speech impediment, keep in mind you're not just being an asshole, you're also being ableist.
#if it negatively impacts your ability to live a safe and comfortable life#then it's a disability#I have been outright told to my face that I was being passed over for an assistant position because I stutter#it ''took too long for me to get certain words out sometimes'' and they didn't want to accommodate it#keep in mind the only needed ''accommodations'' here were fucking patience#no I'm not completely unable to work because of my speech impediment#but it does restrict me from certain jobs and positions#all because people are just impatient#and yeah yeah ''speech therapy exists'' and all that but 1: that doesn't work for everyone#and 2: the mere existence of a therapy to make you ''talk normal'' proves it's a disability
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