#an awful mess
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beagan broke down last night. we left the bar and i just drove her around for a while, and then parked my car in front of her house and just held her while she sobbed and sobbed. cos the boy she loves is going away tomorrow, and he'll be gone for a year at least. all the way in italy. and even now, he is distancing himself from her, tho he says he loves her, trying to make the separation easier on himself. he's been distancing himself for months, now, and i hate him for it. i just want to say: can't you see what you are doing to my girl? i know it's going to hurt both of you when you have to go, but it won't hurt any less just because you're not spending time with her. you should be spending every spare minute with her, soaking up memories. the stupid asshole doesn't deserve her.
when i was driving home, the mix tape in my car played this softies song, "an awful mess." and it said: she's saving it up, it's pulling her down into an awful mess - if you loved her any less, she would go.
i wish i had a magic vacuum so i could suck up all the pain of everyone i care about. i hate the fact that i can't fix everything for all of them.
[journal entry, 12/13/03]
#razorsadness#my writing#journal entry#2003#love#heartbreak#friendship#an awful mess#lissa aka beagan
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ṇ̵̛̱͌̅̃͛̔o̴̮̓̀͂́̃_̴̛̲́s̷͈̋̈́̄̋͠ị̶͔̗̐͐̐̒̕g̵̛̱̘̣̑͂ņ̴̰͔̘͇̏̒̓̇͠͝a̸̜̥̩̭͋̌ḷ̶͔̖͗͋͛͛̃͆
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#gojo satoru#satoru gojo#geto suguru#satosugu#jjk gojo#eye strain/#eye horror/#like i said ik this concept has been done before and probably better than this but i hope that i did it Okay#i hope all the eye strain was not in vain gjhfgsh the amount of blue light in this image is not recommended by doctors#smh gojo ipad baby confirmed#too much screentime.png#in other news im happy i came up with smth else 2 put alongside the piece itself !!#was playing around with filters and effects and i was like ooh what does the binarization button do#makes it look like found footage is what it does i love it SO much#i almost like it better than the coloured version but i would rather die than let a day and a half of rendering go to waste#esp after i already scrapped the intended p2#still i would have posted the full b/w one side by side but it made the post look so busy and distracting and awful#so it's just geto's face ig smile :)#happy i stuck it out w this!!!#fr all i dunk on gojo gdi his aesthetic n design works so well with glitches and messed up technology#tb to tht other gojo + teal + glitches piece i did frever ago captioned smth like 'watch what you eat'#the glitch brushes in my inventory exist fr him and him alone
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good morning ☀️
#your mom#today is the first day in like three weeks that i didn’t wake up with that fuckin awful cold#gay#also we had a proper blizzard yesterday after like no snow yet this year#and it was magical#and then it rained this morning so it’s a mess outside but whatever#gay hot#gay bulge
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*percy controlling akhlys’ poison to use it against her and choking her on her own tears and saliva*
annabeth: never do it again. never do anything like it again. i’m begging you
many years later
*percy and annabeth’s teenage children being held at knifepoint by enemies, seconds away from being killed*
annabeth: percy, do it
#percy: kiddos close your eyes okay?#the thing is#he did it to protect annabeth but in her eyes that awful sight wasn’t worth her life#it looked so evil and twisted#but if her children are in danger then there are no longer limits#she will gladly watch percy suck the blood from their eyes and mouths before she lets her children die#do NOT mess with their kids#percy jackson#annabeth chase#percabeth#percababies#heroes of olympus#the house of hades#house of hades#pjo#percy jackson and the olympians#dark!percy#dark percy#riordanverse#pjo headcanons
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if we define “good dad” by genuinely wanting what’s best for your kid, loving and caring for them unconditionally, being patient with them, making them feel valued, giving them the space to express themselves, encouraging their talents, and genuinely trying your best and doing what you think is best for them, then Silco was a good dad.
But if we define “good dad” by actually being able to properly parent and discipline your child, ensuring they aren’t a danger to themselves and others, teaching them healthy life lessons so that they can grow, not projecting your own unresolved trauma onto your child in a codependent way, and being a good role model, then Silco was NOT a good dad.
#he was the best dad as someone with his messed up ideology and unresolved issues could be methinks#that still doesn’t mean he was a positive influence tho#but he did what he genuinely thought was best#his best was just AWFUL tho#arcane#arcane critical#arcane silco#silco#arcane league of legends#jinx#arcane jinx#arcane s1#paranalysis
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saw a take so fucking rancid on twitter i almost deleted the entire app from my phone jesus fucking christ
first of all ao3 is an archive site. this is like going to the library and saying "oh i dont like this" on every piece of media you find that you dislike and thinking they should be stamped with some sort of a marker just cause you didnt like it
you can always click back and leave. fic writers owe you nothing to explain themselves and their creations. if they have mistagged or miscategorized fics, then i understand, however there are report tools for that instead of yelling at the artist tbh
im not saying free works arent necessarily above criticism. but this is just. fucking wild. its common courtesy to just enjoy stuff (or fucking leave if you dont, the back button is free) and if the artist specifically asks for critiques, then give one - constructive that is, shitting all over someones work is not proper criticism, mind you
i just find it fucking wild people are treating art and archive sites as social media these days like this and everything needs to be policed and ~catered to the algorithm~ like. no. ao3 doesnt have an algorithm. you should be able to fucking tell what you like and what you dont like and steer away from that kind of content and let people fucking be with their art. they dont owe you anything (except trigger warnings i'd argue, but i know some people disagree with that as well for some reason), and imagine how much more energy you'd have if you only engaged with things you liked and spent time looking at instead of going to places where you dont enjoy yourself. let alone spending time telling other people you dont enjoy what they enjoy. what a fucking life
#like what the fuck#where is the common courtesy of fandoms these days im just fucking asking. its ridiculous#the back button is free. shutting your fucking mouth is free. constructive criticism when people ask for it is nice but only then#these are fucking basic level fandom engagement things#am i old or are people just this fucking awful now that these guidelines dont exist anymore#im just. ough#sorry i had to get this out. idk as someone who has never left unsolicited advice for anyone and never gotten it back it just#it fucking grinds me that people are like this now. like fucking wow#ive been here for almost two decades soon and i still know how to behave. yall better fucking learn#im gonna go back to video game sorry i really needed to yell for a hot fucking second#if you choose to reblog this dont fucking clown on it okay. god#night is an absolute mess on main
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How it feels to not like timebomb after s2
#I'M NOT A HATER I SWEAR I ACTUALLY REALLY LIKE IT ON PAPER#i do however think that it came literally out of nowhere and was hella rushed and kinda ridiculous#like. if the argument is that original ekko fell in love with jinx it doesn't make sense because they were enemies for most of their lives#if the argument is that current ekko fell in love with au powder and now projects these feelings on jinx it's kinda uh. messed up#because she's a whole different person. entirely. it doesn't matter if both these version started out as a 9-year old powder. they had#extremely different lives and experiences and thinking that “there's still this kind of powder in jinx deep down” is straight-up awful#OR even if he didn't project his feelings for powder on jinx why would he love her in the current universe? last time they met she blew them#up and now she wants to commit suicide. there's literally no reason for him to have any kind of feelings except the slight friendly#affection that's left from all those years ago. and yet the show and most importantly the fandom treats them like a couple??? i don't get it#also it's kinda insane that s2 turned jinx and ekko into flat shipping material#again. obviously i have nothing against the shippers and do not condemn it in any way. i'm just expressing my thoughts on the matter#also what pisses me off the most. is how in ep9 jinx in fully painted with ekko's symbols here and there. has the bandage (?) on her chest#like vi. has a hood that looks like a drawing that isha made. and yet there's no fishbones or any reference to silco at all#i mean. i get it s2 hates him but i can't help it#they gave her all these relationships and pretended that they're significant to her and yet they didn't have any proper development#to really earn it#arcane critical#arcane season 2#anti timebomb#jinx arcane#ekko arcane
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Any thoughts about how you're gonna approach moons sis def being a fading kit? How would this work in your world?
I've gotten this question a few times and it's honestly really simple; she can be a Fading Kit who refused to fade.
Fading Kits are extremely common to the point of not being a thing that is mourned. Clan Cats believe that they're StarClan spirits who come down to deliver the souls of the rest of the litter, and sometimes "fall in" either by accident or to briefly visit.
So, Moon's parents would believe she was just a normal occurance, until they were wracking their brains trying to figure out what's happening and realize the description fits what should have just been a StarClan visitor.
But that's as far as I'm going with it for now. I need to see where this arc goes, because I might end up deciding that it would fit the story better to do something different entirely. You know how the writing team is about having 6th books that are massively disconnected from the tone and themes of the 1st one.
It's just too early to be making plans-- but the idea that Moonpaw's sister would be a Fading Kit in BB's cultural overhauls isn't even slightly hard to work with.
#Good worldbuilding rules shouldn't be holding you back yknow?#I don't make cultural additions that are so rigid that they make the setting hard to work with#Also fading kits have some secretly messed up lore implications Ive mentioned before and have to make a big post collecting lmao#Answering it this way because like 2 other people came into the inbox with a like... worried tone?#Like 'aw man elder bones they really threw you a curveball'#Don't worry kids this ball is not even slightly curved. This ball is so straight it named its daughter keighleighnn#Better Bones au#Changing skies spoilers
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No but like every time I think about Splinter and what he had to go through just to keep the boys alive, my heart hurts for him so badly. Is he perfect? No not at all, but none of them are and by god does he love his sons.
The fact that all of them are alive, and grew to thrive despite the circumstances surrounding them is a testament of how much Splinter loves his boys. He raised four babies following the most traumatic time of his life, all alone with nothing but the sewers to house them (to hide them.) I feel like he’s not given the credit he deserves for all he’s done.
And I get that it’s easy to hold up his flaws and faults when it comes to parenting, I myself like looking into them because flawed characters are super interesting and said flaws make them more realistic and engaging, but he tries, and again, so many others would have given up on the boys or failed along the way but Splinter didn’t.
He’s their father, for all his faults he did his damndest to make sure they survived.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt splinter#rise splinter#he’s not perfect as I’ve said#and he’s got a whole slew of flaws and faults#but he’s a person - we are all flawed#he loves his sons dearly dearly dearly even if he struggles along the way to show that#parenting is not easy! especially as a traumatized mutant who is forced to do it alone#side note but I think this is one of the reasons why it kiiiiiinda ruffles my feathers to see so many people assign parentification to Raph#and in turn make Splinter out to be way worse and way more distant than he is in canon?#like idk I just don’t see what so many others see ig but maybe that’s just me#i guess my thoughts are like- let parents have flaws without villainizing them?#they’re still parents even if they mess up?#we can discuss the repercussions of a parents actions on a child while not casting that parent as an awful person#parents are peopleeee#I could go on but yeahhh#idk it bothers me seeing splinter’s efforts undermined when he’s been through so much#idk if ppl realized this by now but I love me some flawed characters#tho I do think in this fandom the ones whose faults are discussed the most are like#Splinter mostly then Draxum then Leo#of the main cast#and in Splinters case in particular his faults are made to cover his good qualities which makes me sad#because he is SO INTERESTING#they’re all flawed characters and tbh so interesting because their flaws are ALSO their strengths in many aspects
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Eventually, everyone leaves.
...do I drive them away?
Some birthday art for Basil... angst .... yummy
Bonus:
Pov its ur 17th but your ever-present guilt that follows u wherever you go is still haunting you
Another version:
some speculation in tags!
#omori#omori game#omori basil#omori fanart#omori art#omori sunny#omori kel#omori aubrey#basil omori#I headcanon that hed feel like . this awful guilt from sunnys eye that#weighs over his shoulders ever time he sees Sunny#“you did it” poster but its arrows pointing to the glass eye#and aubrey sometimes turns into this. horrible mess of a monster ect from . the bullying#kel simply a smile when basil looks at him because thats all he was for four years#thank you for coming to my ted talk#my art
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Nightmares (LMK Comic/storyboard/fake screenshots?)
Content warning: Blood, character death, sad monkeys
#my art#lego monkie kid#lego macaque#lego sun wukong#six eared macaque#sun wukong#sad monkeys#my little sad monkey king#getting those angst vibes rn :(#shadowpeach#but sad#aw#there's no comfort here#hurt no comfort#angst#character death#a bit of suffering for Wukong#lowkey hoping season 5 addresses these two#but also MK's internal conflict#this show is just a mess of issues#I guess this is what happens when you try to psycho-analyze characters from a 500-year-old Chinese fable.#shiiiiit
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Words Collide
[First] Prev <--> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jiang fengmian#yu ziyuan#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#Almost axed this comic but then I remembered I cut the previous argument between them and I guess they can have this.#and by 'this' I mean their toxic arranged marriage verbal battles.#As I previously mentioned in a comic I have chosen to see them as mlm and wlw in an unfulfilled relationship.#The yearning is for companionship. I think they do care for each other it's just something deeply complicated. And bitter.#I truly feel for JC and WWX in this scene because while it's implied YZY really pushes the limit...it's apparent this isn't new.#And it's so petty! Anyone who lived through a parent pitting you against a sibling can tell you that this stuff messed them up#regardless of what side you were on (the golden one or the fuck up).#It doesn't matter what is said. It matters that it was said at all. That you can't shake the concept once it was spoken.#The Jiang household is so much more miserable the deeper you examine what's going on and how they cope with it.#Knowing that a parent does not like you is just awful. I wish everyone who's been through it all the best. You didn't deserve that.#Next update is back to the jokes! Remember jokes? It jingled merrily...How I miss the sound of those bells...
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inner child
#world of warcraft#anduin wrynn#the war within#struggling to explain what im trying to capture here#I think for the longest time I believed adulthood hit when the child you was no more#so until recently i refused to accept that my childhood had ended#But the truth is that child-you kinda just hands adult-you the wheel of the car but they're still there and messing with the radio#anyway I imagine Anduin's inner child self and what his opinion is of everything that has happened#AdultAnduin believing his childself would hate him but he actually looks up to him with some sortve concerned awe#also the background looks like what i see when i close my eyes and i think represents in one's headspace pretty well#i think i used something similiar in an ealier piece of him panicing and#it just works so well when covering mental stuff
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Merc getting praised to kingdom come by sky sports for their team 1 not flopping and 2 not screwing their drivers over like the other teams on the grid this weekend, only to then fuck their winning driver over because of the weight of the car is a true act of solidarity from them I didn't expect. They really said F1 means Flop as 1
#f1#formula 1#formula one#spa gp 2024#belgian gp 2024#i do feel bad for george if he is disqualified because that is fucking rough#i would haunt those responsible for the entirety of the summer break ngl#but from the part of me that enjoys the drama and the mess it is also the most unserious thing that could've / could happened lmao#like still feel awful for george but it's a little entertaining#sorry george I have a vendetta against your team I'm afraid
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So like... it's a Thing in all fandoms where fans sort of latch onto fanon versions of characters and their dynamics with each other that are actually completely off-base, right? I don't know if this phenomenon has an official name, but I've seen it so many times and it's fascinated me every time. Especially when a character's popular fanon selves don't end up just diluted from their source material, but straight up OPPOSITE their canon portrayal.
So one of my "favorite" variations on this was how the early PotC fandom used to get Will EXTREMELY wrong, especially in comparison to Jack, and it made finding in-character fics SO. DAMN. DIFFICULT.
I've talked about this MULTIPLE times before, as have several other fans. It's a dead horse being beaten. But basically certain prevalent takes on fanon!Will have in the past leaned towards a personality that was very patient and grounded and even demure to contrast against Jack's off-beat personality and Elizabeth's fiery rebelliousness. Because Elizabeth has the drive to push back against social norms, Will became the foil who fell back to his pre-pirate version, reluctant to break rules unless she pulled him into it, even in post-CotBP timelines. Likewise, Jack was the one with the WTF decision making, while Will was more rooted in reasonable decisions.
And by their appearances, archetypes, and certain elements of their world views, you'd THINK that's how it works. When we meet Will in the governor's foyer, Will is so lovestruck and doe-eyed and subservient to the governor, I think that people thought that's just Who He Is. Especially because he often acts as Jack's straight-man foil in the comedic elements. Straight-laced. Rigid. Even boring or timid.
But if you actually pay attention to the movies, it's very much the opposite. In canon, Jack's USUALLY the level-headed one who just happens to have chaos follow him, because of the way he can wield it. He thinks in long run, tries to solve problems with words and as little fighting as possible as often as he can. Ideal situations for Jack are more like a thief--he wants to be in and out of the job as silently and slick as possible. The scenarios he's in are insane, because the way he throws other people around with those scenarios is kind of insane, but he himself remains largely cool and collected.
That's Jack.
THIS is Will:
Canon!Will starts out literally so impulsive and rash, Jack has to physically manhandle him at certain points to keep him from blowing up his plans--and then still gets taken out because he underestimates his listening skills and impatience. Will corners Jack into what is functionally a cage match to the death by sanely locking the door with his sword and very nearly wins. He is constantly at 11, constantly demanding things be done faster, more directly, and at the same time quietly scheming behind Jack's back almost from the get-go. He does flashy jumps and flips off of things because using the stairs is too slow or whatever. He shows up in DMC yelling at Jack to give him his compass at the point of the sword, and insisting he'll get Davy Jones' key by just "cutting down everyone in his path."
Even when Will mellows out significantly in AWE, there are remnants of this contrast still there. Jack's plan for leading Beckett to Shipwreck Cove seems to have been a very reasonable and underhanded effort to deliberately make sure Elizabeth is inside the Cove while Will is on Beckett's ship, in command of the Compass. Meanwhile Will's plan was to leave a breadcrumb trail of vulture-sea gulls feasting on dead soldiers' corpses.
What I'm getting at is, yeah, Jack's a charismatic "rogue" and Will's a "romantic hero" TECHNICALLY. Jack makes quippy jokes, and Will glares and scowls and WTFs back. But not only are they are both more alike than people give them credit for, they are also totally opposite their roles' traditional personalities in ways that the fandom tends to overlook.
TLDR; Jack's crazy, Will's a sweetheart. But Will is also a manic gremlin, and Jack doesn't always know what to do with him about it, so they often end up something like this:
And more fans need to play with this fact, the end.
#Will Turner#Jack Sparrow#PotC#Pirates of the Caribbean#CotBP#Curse of the Black Pearl#DMC#Dead Man's Chest#At World's End#AWE#He's off his half-pin barrel hinges#And he's (does the swagger thing)#The fact that Jack IMMEDIATELY got rid of Will in DMC is extremely funny in this context#'I don't know what this idiot is going to do--I will stick him somewhere so far away he can't mess anything up'#SPOILER ALERT: he still does#'I have your stupid key Jack. And I brought the kraken with me too.'
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#kirby#daily kirby#my art#digital#hal laboratory#nintendo#I don't think I will#I got several nice and thoughtful gifts last year I can only use if I have more than a couple inches of hair#but it is tempting.#also I actually remembered gdq was live for once#I love the awful block it's such a mess
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