#america is just fat straight up

[humsbugs]

chubby chaser soviet…..

[giantkillerjack]

Hey remember that time Tim Burton said that he doesn't include Black characters as leads because it would be too "politically correct"? They just don't fit his "vision", guys! Unless they're villains. Obviously. 🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮 /s (Apparently, this is the case so far in the Wednesday show.)

So yeah. This movie here by Jordan "one of the best filmmakers alive" Peele and Henry "the guy who actually directed Nightmare Before Christmas" Selleck being one of the best animated movies to come out in years is so awesome on so many levels:

Kat as a Black alt girl - fuck anyone who says they don't exist! Of course they do! and they're punk as hell! In fact, this specific scene highlights exactly how fucking punk she is: It has been firmly established that HER REBELLION HAS REAL AND SEVERE POTENTIAL CONSEQUENCES beyond just dirty looks from preppy kids. If she is expelled, she goes back to prison. This child arrives at school in chains. And she STILL does this within minutes of arriving because she has a strength of identity that she won't let anyone take away from her. WHAT COULD BE MORE PUNK THAN THAT????

Genuinely anti-fascist messaging (Disney would NEVER) and a direct commentary on the prison industrial complex (hey, Tim! have your films had anything important to say, like... ever? Just checking, cause I know you got that incurable progressive mediocrity disease. 😭 Poor bb.)

Excellent comedy! (It's Key and Peele, baby!)

James Hong is there and he is great.

Wonderful and dynamic character/set design!

An interpretation of healing from trauma that was so beautiful I wept.

An extremely sexy giant demon DILF lord!

Original songs!

A FAT FEMALE CHARACTER WHO IS A COOL BADASS WHILE REPRESENTING SUPPORT BETWEEN GENERATIONS OF BLACK WOMEN??? WHAT?!!?!! YES!!!!!!! (hey real quick, everyone! Name the first 10 badass fat female characters that come to your mind! Oh what's that? It's taking you a while to think of even 5???? SO WEIRD. Okay then just name a couple fat Tim Burton characters who aren't villains. Oh?? THERE'S LITERALLY NONE??? HOW FUCKIN' STRANGE)

And let's not forget, THE FIRST TRANS BOY I HAVE EVER SEEN IN A MOVIE!!!! RAUL IS A MAIN CHARACTER WITH A TON OF SCREENTIME AND HIS AGENCY IS INTEGRAL TO THE PLOT!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰 he's perfect and his Hispanic heritage is not only much-needed representation, but it is also relevant to the beautiful artwork he makes in the style of pre-colonial Latin American religious imagery!

Raul's art stands in direct contrast to the grim cold aesthetic of the Catholic Church. (Disney would NEVER) Which IS in other movies I've seen.... so long as the non-Christian imagery represents an ancient evil that highlights the nobility and necessity of the Church for crushing Pagan religions. This is the FIRST TIME I've ever seen an inversion of that trope and it RULES.

Anyway this movie is so good and everyone needs to know about it.

Wendell & Wild (2022)

Bad things happen to people I’m close to... They die.

[i-loved-silly]

WOLVERINE x READER x DEADPOOL — fuckup twinsies

dp&w spoilers!!

So I had a silly idea. Sorry if it’s out of character, I haven’t written for canon characters in a fat while but these two are stuck in my head. Enjoy :3

POV: you’re a dimension hopper : sent to the Void as a punishment for doing your thing. Damnit

Dust. Sand. Desert. That was all you knew ever since you were banished here. The place you were basically forced to call home—funnily enough, (actually it’s rather sad) you had forgotten what your real home was. A large, and I mean LARGE amount of timeline touching and dimension hopping does that to you.

By spending years of visiting dimensions and maybe messing a couple things up, you damaged your own timeline. Simply because you wanted to take Mr Captain America’s shield back to your home dimension. What can you say, a little artifact doesn’t hurt, right?

Except it did.

Now you’re stuck here, and honestly? It’s fine. You had nothing to return to anyway. At least you thought. TVA explained it that way, anyways. Everything was fine. You spent your years here surviving and avoiding Cassandra Nova by making your own little underground hobbit hole. How cute.

Everything was the same everyday—you hid out, occasionally left to find food and materials, came back to safety. Until one day you heard something while out scavenging—almost like distant yells? From above you??—You looked up and was shocked to see two figures falling out of the sky and barreling straight for you.

"OOMF --" You were thrown onto the sand on your back, you swore you felt a couple bones break...or something. All your belongings in your little ripped backpack went flying around you and the others stabbed into your back. Then there was the weight on top of you. A muscular , red, and talkative weight.

"Owww, oh fuck, that hurt. I hit bones. I just hit someon--oh." Deadpool groaned, snapping his elbows back into place to get a good look at you. He blinked. "Well lookey here, who the hell are you? Wait, did i kill them?" He gasped as he saw your pained scowl.

Wade frantically shook you by the shoulders. Getting hit by something from that high should have killed you. You coughed, ugh...your whole body hurt. You don’t remember if you gave yourself overpowered abilities before hopping into this dimension…or the last one. Was it during the time you went to the Loki-verse? Season one, episode five? Nah.

"Get off of them," Logan grunted, dusting himself off from his spot a few feet away. Hey, at least you weren’t hit by both of them. "See what you did, you fucking idiot? Get away from them."

"Woah, okay! First of all, it's not like I wanted to crash into someone like a wrecking ball, got it? I am not Miley. But look, they're fine!" He shook you by the shoulder again and you spat out a bit of blood.

"Guhh..." You groaned, rolling over. Yep, your bones were definetly crushed.

"We're not here to poke around, Wade. We're on a mission." Logan glanced at your beat up form wearily--oh well, if you weren't dead by now you'll be fine.

"Fine," Wade let go of you, letting your body flop back onto the sand with another "thud" on impact. "Oops, Im sooo sorry. I-..oh come on! Don't you have at least a little bit of a curious tickle? They can help us." He whined, gesturing to you and to Logan.

"They're a stranger, bub. Just...leave em there." He hesitated, then grunted and turned the other way.

You groaned in pain again--seems like they're your only lines--and sat up on your elbows. Your head was pounding and suddenly it was too bright outside. "W-wait..I’m fine..just let me.." You pressed your palm against your forehead.

Wade leaned down in front of you, placing his hands on his knees. "Oh, you're alive. Good. Why are you here, little buddy?"

You tried laughing nervously but a cough interrupted you. Right, there was sand in your lungs. "I uh...couple years ago I touched a timeline I shouldn't have. More like, a lot of timelines. Kinda-sorta fucked up."

Wade let out a loud gasp and placed his hands on the sides of his face, then made a giddy noise. "Eek! Fuck up twinsies! You heard that, Logan? We aren't the only dimensional fuck ups!" He was oddly enthusiastic, the scruffy guy in the distance wasn't so much.

Actually now that you think about it, he seemed a bit enraged. Just a bit. “Who the hell is we?”

"Who are you again?" You muttered, grunting as you worked on standing up. Wade extended a hand and you took it, before you could thank him—he quite literally yanked you up by the arm like a fucking ragdoll. You hit his chest and your eyes widdened.

"How the heck do you not know me? I mean you probably don’t know him, that sexy beast of a man is Logan, professionally Wolverine. Not a very good one though. Anyway, I'm Wade Wilson, but you can call me Wade. Or Deadpool. Or the Merc with a Mouth. Or the Chimichanga Bandit. Or—"

"Wade, shut the fuck up."

Wait.

“Wait, you’re Deadpool and Wolverine? Like the real ones?”

PART 2

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for calling my boyfriend out after a party after he very Frenchly insulted our cooking?

I (25M) am dating J (27M), and we live together. For the most part he's wonderful, super sweet, and perhaps the most French man living today. He's a walking stereotype, right down to the sexiness. He's Parisian (we live in the states) and has a huge obsession with wine and cheese, and I'll be honest, he can be pretty snobby. He was raised by some well to do old money family that disowned him when they found out he was gay and it shows. He has a few antiquated ideas of what America is like, especially when it comes to food. Anything that has roots he doesn't recognize gets criticized. It's a classism problem, we recognize that, and he is trying to work on it. He slips up sometimes.

We went to a housewarming party two nights ago. It was a potluck deal and I brought a beef chili I had been working on for like two days, it was my pride and joy, and J didn't even have anything bad to say to me about it.

Anyway, an hour or so into the party we went to get food. He had a few glasses of wine, so he wasn't quite thinking straight. It turns out somebody brought homemade Frito pie (and pretty fancy frito pie too, with jalapeños and sour cream and pico de gallo, it was amazing and delicious and I am still dreaming about it), I'm southwestern and it was a staple for me growing up so I tripped over myself trying to get at it. He noticed how eager I was and scoffed at me. I asked what was so funny, and he said it was baffling that I'd go for that first since it was "comically American, down to the fried chips riddled in it." I rolled my eyes and ignored him.

Turns out the friend who made it was standing a few feet away and overheard him. She told us that she worked super hard on making the chili and cooking the pie, and if he didn't like it, he didn't have to have any. I was so fucking mortified I felt like dying. I apologized on his behalf and we stayed for a bit longer, but I was so embarrassed and angry that we left about an hour after that. I couldn't make myself have a good time. As a bit of an apology I left our friend a container of the chili I made and said if she wanted to make a pie out of it I'd be honored, and she happily accepted.

This is where I may be TA. As soon as we got in the car I blew up at him. I told him that he disrespected my culture, my cooking, my taste, and worst of all, embarrassed me in front of a friend and insulted something that brought her joy. I said "if you see Americans as so lazy, stupid, fat, and disgusting, then why are you even living here? Why the fuck do you even wanna be with me? Am I just the only good one to you?" I was laying into him for about 5 minutes. It was the worst fight we'd ever been in, not that we get in many.

He got really quiet after that and just muttered out an "I'm sorry." We were silent the ride home and we went straight to bed when we got there. I even heard him sniffling when we were trying to fall asleep, which was heartbreaking and started to make me feel like I'd fucked up, too. He's been distant for the last few days and I feel like I need to apologize.

Do I? Was I TA? I just got so upset that I couldn't take it anymore. I really love him and I just keep worrying that any second he's gonna say he wants to break up, and I never want that to happen. Any advice is appreciated.

[dreamertf]

A Change in Position

/masculinization, nerd to jock, gay to straight,

Kevin was a fat short gay guy living in rural America, god did he hate it. He couldn't find a single person that was into him. Chelsea, his best friend, on the other hand was a beautiful woman that got men easily, but no one knew how to please her.

As she was doomscrolling tiktok she got an ad for some sort of mouth spray that promised to seduce anyone and make them act how you want them to. Of course she thought it was some gimmick but for some reason she felt incredibly compelled to buy it.

The next week she set up a hangout with Kevin. As soon as they saw eachother, Chelsea launched onto him. Kevin gasped as his friend greeted him with a kiss.

"What the hell Chelsea?"

"What's wrong babe? You usually love it when I kiss you there"

He felt dizzy, babe? But he was gay. He held his head in his hand for a second as memories forced themselves into his brain, specifically of Chelsea as his girlfriend.

He looked down at her as a mischievous grin spread across her face, god she was beautiful. He took her into an embrace as she continued to kiss him.

"You're so handsome, babe" his face reformed itself as he became taller, having to bend down for Chelsea to kiss him. His fat melted away as his jawline showed for the first time in years, becoming more square and attractive. His adam's apple jutted out as his voice dropped, he let out a rumbling moan as it did.

"Fuck babe, what are you doing to me" Kev muttered through stiffled breaths, his voice sexy and raspy.

"Im just trying to please my perfect man" she said, as he started to take lead, wrapping his arms around her like he had done it so many times before.

He took off his shirt as his muscles exploded with muscle, he deserved it after all, spending all of his time in the gym. His pecs morphed into a perfect set of juicy slabs of meat as Chelsea trailed down his body, making sure to take extra time licking and sucking on his nipples. She gasped as he grabbed her ass.

"You like that?" He said, still breathing heavily. She looked up at the 6'5" adonis in front of her as his muddy eyes turned blue and his greasy hair became dirty blonde.

"Fuck me..." she whiapered under her breath, shocked by how well the spray had worked.

He chuckled as his appendage grew longer, his abs defining themselves as his fat completely evaporated. Leaving him with a perfect muscular body.

"Come here bitch, ill show you what a real man feels like."

He said as he flipped her around, pushing her against the wall. He spit on his large hands as he started to massage his 18 inch thick member that was already dripping in pre.

Her panties already off as he started slowly. She gasped as it full went in.

"I bet im the biggest you'll ever have slut." He said as he smacked her ass.

[mariaxman]

COLOSSUS X FEM!READER

Resume: he finds you, after years and years on end of never forgetting you, even after you were taken away from him so suddenly, he finally finds you…

A/N: Idk how old he in the DP movies so I just made him 30-31😭 I don’t specifically like how it ended considering how long I worked on this, but I hope it’s good enough for y’all<3!!

(PURE FLUFF)

Everything started back in Siberia, in 2009 when he was 16. He worked on his family farm and you were visiting family for an undetermined period of time. It was a harsh winter, not many foreigners came during these times of year. So, when you arrived with your family in a farm near his, it wasn’t hard to notice.

He actually didn’t talk to you until about a week later, and it’s all thanks to Illyana. The little girl had somehow snuck out and gotten to know your little sister, and they had grown to be very good friends. Illyana, bless her heart, thought Piotr would REALLY like you. She said ‘that he had so much in common with me’.

To say Peter liked you from the start would be an understatement. You were out back with your sister, making a snow man, when Illyana dragged him across the road. The little blond called out your sister’s name and ran over to both of you. You were wearing a puffy winter coat and earmuffs, cheeks and nose flushed from the cold. That was the best day of his life. And that’s how everything began.

Over your stay, Illyana and your sister hung out together almost. Every. Single. Day. And every time they did, he came along. Just to watch over Illyana! Of course!

During the girls’ little play dates, Piotr stayed with you, conversations came smoothly and effortlessly. You didn’t have a lot in common, he was a farm boy and you were more of a city girl.

He even spents New Year’s Eve with you. Sat under an old, unfeathered tree, holding a pocket watch in your hand as you awaited. He’d secretly hoped you’d kiss him, under the sheepish excuse of ‘a worldwide tradition’, when he in fact just wanted to kiss you, a lot.

That night was when you shared your first kiss, well, together atleast. When he had pulled away, you fell into a giggling fit and slumped against him with a content smile. Maybe this wasn’t so bad…

He spent a lot of time with you. You came over to his farm during spring to chat and watched him work. Hell, you met his mom! Alexandra LOVED you, she gave you a family recipe she swore to never let out the family. Everything was going more than fine, until Summer rolled around.

On a cloudy summer day, your mother woke you up early, before sunrise, and told you to pack everything. You were leaving to America once again. You remember the feeling of your heartbeat filling your ears, a lump rose in your thoat, and you couldn’t swallow it back. Nevertheless, and without complaints, you packed everything, leaving the room you slept in, empty. By the time you brought your bags out, it was early morning, around 7, and you knew Piotr was working outside. You wanted to see him so bad, yet… not at all.

You felt bad, heartbroken. Everything you had built up to be between you two was just.. taken, snatched straight out of your hands. But the worse is that you knew this’d happen. The feeling of guilt clouded to brain, tears filling your eyes. You tried to blink them back.. but you just couldn’t.

You fidgeted with the rings around your fingers, inhaling shaky breath after shaky breath, trying your very best to not just bust into sobs. You were so deep in thoughts you didn’t see Illyana dragging her big brother over with a confused face, until she called your sister’s name out, your heart dropped.

Turning around, you see your sister and the little blond hugging eachother tightly, and… Piotr, standing behind in his work overalls, a defeated look on his face. Fat tears rolled down your cheeks as you run over to the taller boy, throwing yourself straight into his. He held you close, flush against his warm skin. There was so much he still had to tell you.. he didn’t have the chance to say I love you, or.. that he was a mutant, or that he didn’t want you to go.

Everything was just stuck in his throat as you cried softly into his neck. Your mother shared a look with your father. Your dad ushered your very confused sister into the car. Your mother called out that they’d be waiting for you, pulling you attention away from Piotr for a few seconds.

The boy set you down slowly, hands holding onto your waist. You sniffled and wiped you eyes. You didn’t know what to say. What COULD you say? You were in love with a boy you’d maybe never see again. You didn’t want it to just be a teen romance. You imagined MARRYING THE GUY FOR CHRIST SAKE! And you knew it was far fetched!

So, you did the first thing that came to your mind to make sure he remembered you. You slipped off a beautiful golden ring with a blood red ruby encrusted in it, grabbed his hand, put it in his palm and closed his fingers over it.

‘’I’ll get this back when I find you again, I swear. Just.. don’t lose it, ‘kay?’’

You told him softly. He could only nod his head in silence. You grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckle with a sad smile, hugged him for the last time with a goodbye and… walking away toward the car.

Only when the car began rolling away did it finally hit him fully like a frein train. You were gone. You left. He didn’t even say ‘I love you’, he was so choked up, he didn’t kiss you. How dumb was he?!

Piotr just.. stood there, with Illyana by his side, waving her little hand at the departing vehicle. He looked down to his hand, the dainty, golden ring small in the palm of his hand. He was never losing this, and he was going to find you no matter what it takes.

————————————-————————Now, your current life was.. good, not amazing but good enough. You discovered you were a mutant with pyrokinetic powers at 18, got disowned AND you feel like some Pyro knockoff.. Yikes!. You lived on your own in a little apartment. The rent was cheap enough and you managed to make it homey enough. Your neighbor was a little blind lady named Althea. She was.. peculiar, to say the least.

You got to know her.. friend? Drug dealer? Arch nemesis? You didn’t know. The only thing you knew was that his name was Wade, he was a mutant and he was ugly as fuck! Oh and that he’s a merc. Sometimes he came a-knocking when Al isn’t home(probably at the casino) and crashes in YOUR apartment to chat or whatever.

Oh, Piotr? You thought about him every passing moment. Did he forget about you? Did he keep the ring? WHAT IF HE PROPOSED WITH IT? Who knows. All that you know is that you never really moved on and it kinda spoiled every relationship you had. Was it pathetic? Absolutely. Did you give a fuck? You’d say no but that’s be a lie. But yeah..

One thing you found out about Wade is that he throws a lot of parties.. for nothing! They’re all pretty fun. You get to meet many of his friends. Like, for exemple, Neena Thurman, or Domino.

She’s actually the only friend of Wade’s with whom you actually get along with. Well, maybe there’s also peter, but you don’t see him very often. Shatter star’s kinda boring. Weasel’s an ass(I’m coming for you TJ miller). Maybe you’d get to know more of them at Wade’s party tonight.

The party in itself was pretty simple, just a friend gathering. Wade BEGGED you to bring your Farmer’s cheesecake(with raisins, but you didn’t tell him that). You swear you made it for him ONCE and he’s been on your ass because of it ever since. It was the recipe Alexandra gave you.

You sat on Wade’s— Al’s — old, banged up couch, surrounded by your friends with drink. The cheap beer Wade handed you tasted decent enough.. it still tasted like piss like any other beer, but who were you to complain?

The little living room was already pretty crowded. Yet, three people were still missing. Two teenage girls Wade claimed you’d LOVE and a.. Russian-metal-dick-man? Wade described him that way, not you!

You were in the kitchen, helping out Wade in the kitchen when the door opened and heavy footsteps were heard. Wade rushed out the kitchen with obnoxious yelling and a ‘’Hi yukio!’’.

You peeked out the open kitchen and saw a huge ass metallic man… so that’s what Wade meant. He was.. familiar, but you just shrugged it off.

Stepping out the kitchen, Wade grabbed you and dragged you to the two teenage girls to introduce you, Yukio and Ellie— or Negasonic teenage warhead — and the metal man, Colossus. Who just.. wouldn’t stop looking at you, cocking his head like he was examining you.. weird.

—————————————————————

A little near the end of the party, you slipped away to the fire escape and sat on the edge of the railing. It wasn’t safe in any meaning of the word, but you genuinely didn’t care… much. The fire escape lead to the one next doors, yours. Maybe that how Wade slipped in your apartment in the first place..

The sound of the sliding door opening and the BANG of metal slammed you out of you thoughts. You shot around to see.. Colossus, a hand over his head. Did he just slam his head against the door?

You snort, gracefully sliding your legs inwards, still seated on the edge.

‘’It is not safe for you to sit there’’

Colossus informs you in a deep, accented voice with his arms crossed over his chest, as if you didn’t know. You shrug

‘’I know that’’

It’s silence. It’s not awkward but not comfortable either. You take his appearance in with curiosity. A dainty golden chain is tied around his neck, the pendant tucked underneath his shirt.

‘’How long have you know Wade?’’

You ask, while swinging your feet back and forth

‘’I have known him for few years’’

You hum and nod, slipping off the edge and sliding to sit with cross-crossed legs, patting the space next to you.

The metal man slowly walks closer and sits down next to you, he’s still very much towering over you, as you expected. You glanced at him from the corner of your eye, he looked so goddamn familiar. But he just couldn’t possibly be Him, he can’t be Piotr.. right?

Again, you we’re lost in your thoughts, fixated on the chain tied around his neck. You slowly reached out.

‘’Can I?’’ You mumble, and he nods. You pull the chain from under his shirt to examine what you thought to be a pendant, only to find a ring.. a very familiar one, with a pure blood ruby… oh so that IS Piotr. Well shit…

Your heart picks up in speed, you’re trying to cover how much you’re freaking out because god you think you’re about to cry AND go into cardiac arrest.

‘’Where’d you get this ring..?’’

Your voice comes out shaky and weak, a lump in your throat.

‘’Ah, someone very special gave it to me years ago, I have been trying to find her’’

You can’t help the grin that spread across your lips. So he has been trying to find you— and so you assume he’s single. Whoo! Thank the stars and above!

‘’.. you don’t recognize me, do you, Piotr?’’

The man freezes, everything clicks in his brain suddenly. Your features, your mannerisms, even your fashion sense! You practically didn’t change, you just grew up. Colossus sighs and grabs you in a bear hug.. a very tight one at that. He mumbled incoherent Russian sentences in the top of your hair.

You giggled and rested your hands on his back, pressing yourself tightly into him. It isn’t like the hugs he used to give you, cause, y’know.. he’s metal. But they’re just as warm and comforting, because it’s him. Fat tears roll down you cheeks.

‘’So you did miss me, big guy..’’

you sigh into his neck

‘’конечно, я так скучала по тебе.. я люблю тебя, моя петарда’’

You giggle again

‘’I can’t understand what you’re saying, Piotr’’

Peter doesn’t respond, opting to cupping your face in his big hands and kissing you. Well, more so pressing.. hard, cold metal to your lips, but you’ll get used to it.

You press your forehead to his, hands resting on the nape of his neck, toying with the chain’s clasp with a quirked eyebrow

‘’Can I… take my ring back now?’’

Piotr chuckles

‘’Da’’

You peck his nose while making quick work of the chain, slipping it off his neck, grabbing the ring and slipping it on your ring finger.

You place your hands back to his cheek, rubbing his cheeks with your thumbs

‘’I’m glad you didn’t propose with the ring, by the way.’’

Colossus let’s put a booming laugh, placing his hands over yours

‘’I would never, I love you, мой петарда’’

‘’I love you too, Piotr’’

<33

[weirdowithaquill]

Traintober 2024: Day 9 - Old Iron

One Old Iron Meets Another:

Edward the Blue Engine is one of the oldest engines on the Fat Controller’s railway, and is well known for his various exploits throughout the years, including pushing Gordon over his hill, chasing James down the mainline and bringing home a heavy train of enthusiasts after snapping his coupling rod. He’s also sometimes referred to as ‘Old Iron’; while it had once been an insult made up by James to try and put Edward down for his age, Edward had embraced the moniker and sometimes even used it jokingly to poke fun at James.

One morning, Edward arrived at Brendam, puffing into the harbour to find the place abuzz with excitement. “What’s going on?” asked Edward. “There’s a famous United States Navy Ship coming to the docks next week,” BoCo said excitedly. “Apparently, he’s on a world tour right now to celebrate one hundred years since the end of the War of 1812.” “Edward would know all about that war!” teased Bill, puffing in with some trucks. “He probably lived through it!” added Ben. Edward rolled his eyes, and set about shunting away his trucks.

Not every engine was as excited as BoCo.

“Stuff and nonsense!” sniffed James. “The Americans lost that war, why are they celebrating it?” “No, no, little James,” huffed Gordon proudly. “The War of 1812 was when Napoleon lost in Russia and the Duke of Wellington won the Battle of Salamance. The Americans were helping the… uh… Sicilians I think?”   “No – this is the War in America that happened at the same time,” BoCo said for the third time to the engines at the Big Station. The poor diesel had begun to realise that for the most part, the steam engines thought of the American War of 1812 as just a sideshow in comparison to the Napoleonic Wars happening in Europe. James was the closest, but even he had no clue why the US would have ships touring around the world to celebrate it’s conclusion.

“It helped Canada maintain its independence,” BoCo declared eventually. That was better received. “Oh! Wasn’t that when they burnt down the US Capitol?” quizzed Gordon. “Marvelous stuff – those Canadians know how to win a war!” “They… didn’t win though,” BoCo tried, but he was drowned out by the Big Engines all excitedly chatting about their own experiences with Canadian soldiers.

The chatter spread all up and down the island. BoCo was secretly thankful that the US ship was only visiting Brendam – he feared just what some of the engines would say otherwise!

Finally, the day came, and the ship came sailing in. Much to Bill and Ben’s astonishment, it was a proper sailing ship with great fabric sails that stretched up on their masts. Edward was the first to speak to the ship.

“Hullo!” he called. “I’m Edward, welcome to Brendam!” “Hey there little steamer,” the ship called back. “I’m the USS Constitution, but you can call me ‘Old Ironsides’ if that suits you better.” Bill and Ben glared – the ship had insulted Edward! “I’m called Old Iron too!” chuckled Edward, ploughing straight over any words the ship might’ve had for the USS Constitution. The ship paused, then looked down at Edward again. “You? What did you do?” Edward was about to reply when BoCo jumped in.

“He chased a runaway engine down the mainline and caught him, all while in desperate need of repair!” The ship stared, then paused again, his eyes widening. “This is Sodor!” he spluttered. “Uh… sorry about my manner; I’ve been preparing to deal with a bunch of spiteful English who sent nasty emails to my captain all trip.” BoCo and Edward shared a look and decided not to mention what the other engines had said.

“That’s alright,” said Edward kindly. “How about we start over? My name is Edward, this is BoCo and those two are Bill and Ben. What’s your name?” “I’m the USS Constitution, but they also call me ‘Old Ironsides’ – I guess we have that in common!” Edward grinned, and soon the five were talking like old friends. ‘Old Ironsides’ had some incredible stories of his time in the Barbary Wars, and the engines had plenty of stories of their own to share too.

“You set the shed on fire?” spluttered Old Ironsides. “How did you not burn down?!” “Sheer dumb luck,” muttered Edward grumpily, remembering returning to the yard to find a sheepish BoCo surrounded by burnt ashes. He’d liked that shed! “I have no idea,” added BoCo with a smile. “Though it was certainly scary at the time.”

By the end of the USS Constitution’s visit, Edward and BoCo had managed to get an email address to keep in contact with their new friend, and whistled goodbye as the old sailing ship set back out to sea.

“Um… where’s Ben?” asked BoCo all of a sudden. “On Old Ironsides,” replied Bill sweetly. Edward groaned, and started backing out of the yard. The USS Constitution had mentioned he was dropping anchor in Liverpool next; the Old Iron would have to chase down another engine once again.

Back to the Master Post

[griots-tales]

Hi! Can I request a t’challa x reader were this recently takes place after avengers endgame were the reader tells & introduces t’challa and shuri to t’challa and reader’s daughter

Sure thing! This is written for a Black AFAB reader living in America. Fluffy PG 13 stuff.

Your first embrace after five years was nothing short of life-giving. You trembled in his arms, breathing in his warmth and choking up with incoming sobs. Your tears soaked up the soft fabric of the olive hoodie he wore to blend in with the neighborhood, and he let you wrap your legs around him when he lifted you up.

The weather was a little warmer than usual, and the air was filled with distant conversation between people getting reunited with their families, just as they were doing... and nobody batted an eye when they saw people crying and hugging each other on the street.

The sun lit up T'Challa's tight curls and eyelashes as you pulled apart slightly, and you still couldn't believe it. It was the same man you thought you would never see again... well, except in your daughter.

T'Challa still didn't know about her. And neither did Shuri.

Your tears still flowed, because you just saw Shuri, who had also come all the way to the US to see you again. You collided with her, kissing her forehead and cuddling her like she would disappear again. Having a baby didn't make it any easier to live without the first.

The three of you hugged again, and you let go of Shuri only to kiss T'Challa for the first time in five years.

"Eww!" Shuri cried in mock disgust, seeing PDA less than six feet away from herself.

The nostalgia of hearing Shuri's chatter, and feeling T'Challa's body against yours hit you again. Bast, you had missed this dearly.

~

You had planned this out from the moment you recovered from the shock of people reappearing out of thin air. Both the siblings were unsuspecting and unassuming of what you were up to even as you walked up to the school at the outreach center.

Shuri was busy playing with a cat that had snuggled up to her in the middle of the park that you were all now in, while you and T'Challa watched, holding hands. He lazily fingered the beads on your braids, taking in how you had changed through the years. You had grown plumper with some post pregnancy fat still curling in love handles around your waist. He seemed to like it, as he smiled when his long fingers brushed subtly, but sensually over your midriff and hips.

The causative of half your stretch marks was about to arrive from her last lesson in school in less than a minute now, and you couldn't wait to see her, now more than ever.

The bell rang, and a high-pitched chorus of yelling ensued, signaling the end of the school day for the little ones. T'Challa smiled at the noise and looked at your expression. Your mischievous smile made him frown a little in suspicion.

"Hey- where are you going?" Shuri called after the tabby as it rushed off to the entrance of the park, which was near the school gate. Children rushed into their parents' arms in the distance, while some rushed out into the play area in the park. The cat followed some first graders around as they opened their tiny bags to bring out various bits of food that they had diligently saved during recess.

Both of them grinned at the sight, but you were focused on the one little girl with her hair done up in two little puffs by none other than you. She giggled and cuddled the cat before she looked up and saw you.

And when you glanced at T'Challa you thought, he knows. The look on T'Challa's face was one of dawning realization as the little girl came running straight to you. His nose sat on her face, albeit a little softer, if possible... and his eyes looked at their near identical twins from a distance. There was also your round face and huge, pillowy lips that turned a little down on the edges.

Shuri, as smart as she was, was in a little denial as she seemed puzzled at the girl's advance.

"Who's that?"

Neither of you answered, waiting for the girl to slow down as she came closer and finally, ran into your arms. You lifted her up like you always did and kissed her on the cheek.

T'Challa swallowed, his eyes welling with a myriad of shock, joy and pain. He stepped backwards to comprehend it fully: you had a child.... a five-year-old.... who looked a lot like him.

You grinned at him and neither of you spoke a word for a second. Shuri finally realized what was going on, and her eyes blew wide as saucers. Your daughter looked a little confused, but being the wise child she was, she decided to introduce herself first.

"Hi!" She said to Shuri, who was near her.

"H-hi! What's your name?" Shuri replied out of reflex.

"I'm Taraji, nice to meet you!" she squeaked, a little nervous, but excited and determined to make a new friend.

"Tara, do you know who these are?" you asked her.

She didn't answer immediately, shyly fiddling with the end of her green dashiki. "That's aunty,"

You put your arm around T'Challa. "And this?"

"That's Baba." she smiled.

T'Challa couldn't hold back his tears further than this; he pressed his sleeve into his eyes to be able to see his daughter better. She was the most beautiful thing in the whole world at that moment, and it brought him to his knees. Taraji approached him slowly from your arms, and T'Challa first held her little palms in his huge hands.

"Are you crying because you're happy?" She whispered curiously.

T'Challa nodded and hugged his daughter for the first time. "Ewe,"

Behind you, Shuri too burst into tears, and you held her as she tried to calm down. It worked out just as you had planned, and you couldn't feel happier and more complete with your sister your love, and your baby girl.

"Even Miss Brown cried when our old class came back... it's okay." She reassured her father, who nodded fervently as he examined every inch.

"I know... I'm just..." He murmured, "I should've seen it coming!" He laughed, catching your eye. You chuckled at him, remembering the nights in the early spring of 2018, that resulted in Taraji.

"So," He wiped his eyes again, "Taraji, hm? Taraji (Y/L/N)?"

The little girl grinned "Taraji (Y/L/N)." she confirmed, cutely mispronouncing your last name.

"Does she know?" T'Challa looked deep into her eyes. Shuri nodded. "Does she know who she is?"

You shrug. "Ask her, King."

Your babydaddy glanced at you before turning to his daughter. "Ungubani?"

The child stood up straight as she said this: "Ndingu Inkosazana T'Challa, Intombika Kumkani T'Challa."

I am Princess T'Challa, daughter of King T'Challa.

[silliestgal]

Heathers Headcanons !

Heather Chandler

She used to be ginger but bleached and dyed her hair blonde because people made fun of her hair color, she has to redye her roots frequently.

Her hair is a wavy-curly but not too curly.

She's around 5'5 or 5'6' but wears heels to make herself taller and she wears shoulder pads to appear much bigger than she really is

I think she is tannish-pale not too pale but pale to an extent, she has freckles on her face and arms but covers them up with long sleeves and make up.

She's an only child and even though she was rich was always bored or lonely due to other kids being scared to approach her.

She isn't a gym rat but does diet on and off and workouts out via cardio (things like jogging for 45 minutes or going the treadmill) and some light ab exercises with light weight training to maintain slim and fit.

She's only slightly above average in academic's but usually makes the nerds do her work because she doesn't like studying or doing homework + she'd think people would call her a nerd if she tried doing better

She has hunters eyes / hj

Heather Duke

She has black hair and straight naturally due to her genetics and she has brown eyes (and mono lids of course). She is 5'4 not that tall, her mary janes make her barely 5'5'.

She was born in South Korea but her parents immigrated to America when she was really young and couldn't remember anything. But her parents made sure she learned how to speak Korean fluently and about her cultural.

She is really smart, loves to read but keeps most of reading time private because people would think she's a nerd and Chandler would tease her for it.

She smokes but not too often due to it's health risks and such, same with drinking she only does it at parties or when she really has hit rock bottom in her life.

She either owns a pet reptile like a snake or a arachnid (I.G. a tarantula.)

Her favorite color is red but she can't have anything that's red or has red on it because it's Heather Chandler's color. I feel like she secretly likes pinks too.

She over-exercises due to her bulimia and her need for control over something (in this scenario her body). She overexercises to purge, sometimes takes laxatives but usually uses the old sticking the finger in your mouth trick to kick in her gag reflex. She doesn't use her jeep to get to school if the other girls don't need a ride to school to be able to exercise even more (via walking).

Heather McNamara

She is 5'8 and her heels make her a bit taller (she is the tallest heather), she has a sleeper build, and dirty blonde curly-wavy hair.

She's chipped her tooth after an accident during cheer practice.

She has pet parrots! Budgies, she wanted a white dog like a maltese or bichon frise but she still loves her budgies nonetheless

She jogs around the neighborhood every morning (she doesn't like waking up early but does it to continue her daily jogs) and goes to the gym 5 out of 7 times a week, and obviously has cheer practice on top of that.

She loves going to the beach or anything that requires physical activity really, basketball, soccer, skateboarding, swimming etc

She's scared of spiders and 'creepy' looking animals.

She tries to always eat protein filled foods and good carbs/fats but she loves junkfood too much and cheats on her 'diet' everyday atleast once!

She binge watches romance movies like The Notebook and other cheesy movies

Not that smart but not stupid either she's just your average joe in academics and trying her best to maintain a 2.5 GPA or higher as a student-athelete.

NO VERONICA HEADCANONS IM SORRYY

[just-an-emily-existing]

Ok so this is definitely inspired by @mean-scarlet-deceiver so thx for that! I just wanted to rant about Duck's little resistance to being ordered about by the controllers but not engines and so on

Soooo lets start off with Duck, he’s obviously Great Western and very proud of it, he’s able to tackle pretty much anything given to him, except for the possible mistreatment of him by his controller(s). ⤵️

During the time he was sent over to Sodor, (Summer of 1955 according to the wiki) Dieselization was taking over everywhere, the U.K, America, you name it, and getting rid of Steamies was a huge trend, by scrapping or just straight up abandoning them (Cue Percy going on his “They don’t repair them” speech) and it really makes me wonder, was Duck ever mistreated or worse, going to be scrapped but was saved by STH just in time? Cuz we’ve seen that GWR isn’t afraid to get rid of their steam engines like Oliver. Which brings me to another point but I’ll do that in a sec. With Duck, he seems to admire his railway so much that he just pushes those beliefs onto his peers while Oliver doesn’t really talk about his railway much, probably traumatised from his whole scrap escape.

Engines like Duck on GWR we’re probably easy to get rid of since they were so compliant and obedient. But with Duck, yes he stand up for himself to his peers, but not to STH. When he asks Duck to go to Edward's station, he does nothing, only gives him a tearful, “As you wish sir…”. It shows that Duck is still not really a suck-up to his controller, but is definitely obedient and just takes it. When Diesel tries to call STH “The Fat Controller” Duck cuts him off and corrects him. It’s very interesting how Duck is so willing to stick up for his controller, maybe even if they’re not so kind to him.

But then again, in “Diesel does it again”, Duck goes on a little strike with Percy to tell him that they refuse to work with Diesel but still Duck seems to be scared, saying “Beg pardon” and saying sir a lot. He seems even more scared when the narrator says, “In a quiet, hurt voice” which gives me the assumption that he feels betrayed, maybe thinking like “Why did he do this, I thought he solved the problem?” Later in the episode, Duck and Percy say, “What will TFC say? He won’t like it!” Which Diesel retorts with “Who's going to tell him I wonder? Not some goody-two shoes like you!” Which makes Duck and Percy shut up for the rest of the episode until Diesel gets more defiant and STH gets rid of him anyway. It really shows how even STH engines can be swayed by characters like Diesel, or maybe other bullies that they’ve had to face. With Duck informing STH about how others would say he “waddles” probably so which is why he doesn’t take shit from others now.

All in all, Duck is a very interesting character when you get past the GWR loving side of him. He’s not all rules and order, he’s also a dreamer, wanting to explore other lands or a bit of a mischievous character, messing with Diesel when he first arrives or with Henry and his 6 tender. I wish they did more with Duck instead of going with “He loves the GWR”

But for characters like Oliver who’ve had a bad experience with his railway, he probably isn't too fond of them, and doesn’t really talk about them much, but one thing Oliver has that Duck doesn’t is being swayed by the opinions of others so much he gets too cocky and ends up in the turntable, which Duck probably made fun of him for years. Although Oliver may have been jaded by his railway, he was quickly humbled by the next. But Oliver and Duck are both kinda scared of their controllers, with Duck being obedient and Oliver being scared he'll get sent away again by STH after ripping Scruffy apart. There’s that sense of fear for those above you with them and I wish we got more on their background and why that fear is always there. Even thought Oliver probably wants nothing more to do with GWR, he's still painted in their colors after being saved. He seems happy but honestly if I was him, I would’ve chosen literally any other color than the one from the railway that was going to kill me.

I wonder if Oliver feels betrayed by his railway, does he still respect them, does he hate them? It just makes me wonder what are his feelings for them now? I’m sure Duck and Oliver get into fights about how the GWR is or isn’t as good as the other thinks. We’ve seen Oliver retort back to Duck with “The Great Western Way, I know! And you’re doing it the wrong way.” So unlike Duck, Oliver isn't afraid to give a little clap-back to his railway.

Oliver is also an interesting character, we never really know about his time on the GWR besides that he was going to be scrapped by them, and we never really get any more info about the GWR. We see characters like Mr. Percival who runs the Skarloey Railway and such, but never the GWR. It’s all up for the fans like me I guess

Anyway I think I’m done yapping so tysm to everyone who read this!

[fandomfluffandfuck]

Dom Bucky, Sub Steve.

Steve wants a Prince Albert piercing but is worried about word getting out about Captain America getting his dick pierced. Bucky asks Tony, who has a guy for that (of course he does) and arranges for a discreet professional to pierce Steve in their floor at the tower. Bucky kisses Steve while the piercer works and swallows down the hurt little sounds Steve makes.

Whenever they get a whole day to play, Bucky strips Steve down and keeps him naked all day. Keeps him hard and wanting. Attaches a little jingly bell to the Prince Albert so he can hear Steve wherever he’s crawling in their apartment. He can hear when Steve’s dick twitches as he calls him a good boy, smacks his ass, slaps his face with Bucky’s dick. That little jingly bell is the sound of a very happy Steve, right where he wants to be, at Bucky’s feet.

First, okay, so, whenever I hear about stucky and piercings, I think of "Titanium (I'm Bulletproof, Nothing To Lose)" by sassbandit which isn't sub Steve and dom Bucky, but actually Bucky getting re-acclamated to his own body after HYDRA with piercings and just 🤤 So, I highly recommend that.

Second, GOD, you mentioning Bucky kissing Steve while it happens lights up the sadist part of me so bad 😮‍💨😮‍💨 like--

I can't fucking stand it. Christ.

This got longer than it was supposed to (when doesn't it? it's me, lmao) also, obviously, pain kink under the cut, so if that's not your thing, this isn't for you

Just imagine how tears would be pouring down his cheeks in streams by the end--he's so sensitive, and, yeah, Steve has experienced a lot of pain in his life, in his body, he can deal with pain silently when he needs to, but he doesn't need to here not with Bucky. Plus, Steve's not... never... he's never had it centered right there like it is with this piercing. And it, it feels so intense. More intense than choking cock rings restraining him, taking his decisions away from him mouth-wateringly, more than thick sounds fucking deep into his cock where his body knows it shouldn't be, setting off these weird, incredible warning bells in his head, more than Bucky squeezing his balls until he chokes on a sob, pain curling deep into his gut and tugging on him hotly, and even more intense than Bucky's fingers cruelly flicking the head of his cock, making it hit against his rigid abs, getting him messy with the spray of his own dripping pre-cum, such a filthy, wet boy, all too eager for the hot, molten pain. It's a fucking lot for Steve to take--getting pierced.

So, tears overflow from his blue eyes like a gorgeous fountain. He looks straight out of a painting. Untouchable. Masterful. Alexandre Cabanel's own. Pale, marble skin with all that redness and wetness transforming his eyes to be ever bluer, glassier. Staring up at Bucky like big, round jewels. He looks so innocent--so helpless.

And, fuck, Bucky loves it.

But it's not just his wet eyes and spasming chest with barely stifled sobs that have Bucky in a chokehold. It's his mouth, too. Steve's lips are glistening wet with spit from how he continues to worry his bottom lip between his teeth and run his tongue over his lips, too. He's just trying to hold in his little sounds but, actually, all he's successfully doing is making himself look more affected--more debauched and wanting, strung out from the anticipation and pain. His lips look plush and fat and wet just like they do when he's finished sucking Bucky off; his throat raw, mouth buzzing. The tip of his nose is red, too. All that crying. Poor thing. Blushing, heated, so overwhelmed, all at once dangerously attractive and snugly adorable. He's fucking--

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

He is temptation.

The things he could convince Bucky to do. The things he has convinced Bucky to do. Anything. Everything.

Steve's turned into this shivering, whimpering, and gasping thing from having his dick pierced. A precious bit of submission enwrapped in thick muscle and smooth, pale skin unmarred by all the pain he's taken--willingly and unwillingly. He's so, so strong. But he's a contradiction. Steve has always been. So commanding and bossy but so, so willing to melt and follow like a fucking dream under the right hands--under Bucky's hands. It makes Bucky want to do so many delicious, good-bad things to him. Just--holy fuck. Bucky could weep, having him like this.

Steve.

His submissive.

Bucky wants to swallow him whole. Christ.

Ever since the serum, Steve's been super needy and super sensitive, and now is no different. Shivering. Whimpering. Gasping. He just can't not fucking squirm and writhe. He might even beg to be held down as it happens because he wants it, he wants it so bad, and he needs to be good for it, but he's not sure he can. Not by himself, at least. Every little touch feels so big. He keeps gasping and flinching, his body twisting, contorting, all that muscle rippling, poetry in motion. His abs are clenching, quivering--coiled up. He's sweating through his tight, tight t-shirt and his pants have gone missing. It should look silly, but it doesn't because it's Steve It's devastatingly attractive instead. Like a wet t-shirt contest, cold water making his shirt transparent and his nipples achingly hard, all too obvious through his shirt. But it's not water. He's just submerged in submission and he likes it, he likes it so fucking much.

All the attention.

The touches.

The cold metal against his dick is like Bucky's arm but so unlike it, too. The sharp points of needles remind him of the danger of Bucky's glinting teeth during particularly mean blowjobs that bring him to his knees, head lolling back, lashes fluttering. The gentle praise and check-ins this God-sent piercer is doing with him are similar to what Bucky does when they try something new. He's so safe. He feels safe. And it's why he's letting go. He wants this fucking piercing more than anything. He wants it just like he wants Bucky to have him, control him, and make all the decisions for him.

So, before and after the piercing, Steve is curled up into a little ball, turning toward Bucky for comfort.

Before it happens at all, he has to be hard for the piercer to know where to properly place the Prince Albert on him (you don't really have to be hard, at least as far as a Google search tells me, but, shh, let's pretend because it's hotter, lmao) and so, of course, Bucky is the one to get him nice and ready, stroking him off, clenched tight in his metal fist, metal like the piercing he's about to get. Steve's breath keeps hitching, unsteady and rough, he's trying not to moan, and trying not to get too worked up, too. He can still cum so easily, even after all the years of having the serum running hot and thick through his veins. He's trying not to moan because he's so, so aware of the fact that the piercer is right there, practically whistling to themself, letting Bucky get Steve ready in peace, the utmost professional, but it's so embarrassing, too. He's hyperaware of their audience and the fact that Bucky doesn't even need to jerk him off for more than a mortifying few strokes because, God, he's been looking forward to this forever. It's too easy to get hard, it'd be so easy to trip over the edge, make a mess that would be so obvious, and then stay hard because--because he wants it. He needs it.

After, when he has it, fucking finally, Steve curls into a ball again. Now he's definitely crying. Really crying. Tear tracks obvious down his flushed cheeks. He's sobbing from the exhilarating pain. Flying high, eyes squeezed shut. Chest heaving. Hurts so good. His tears wet Bucky's shirt and the thin, intimate skin between his neck and shoulder as his fists squeeze at his shirt, the seams groan with his shaky strength. His bottom lip can't stop quivering as his hot little mouth hangs open dumbly. His knees are drawn in so close, curled around his throbbing, throbbing, throbbing cock. The tip of his cock feels so hot and inflamed. It's all he can feel, all he can pay attention to, completely locked in the moment and aware of every nerve in his dick and balls. Lit up. Electic. The way the pain drips like lava down his shaft and pools in his balls, it feels like someone's shoved a cattle brand into his guts--awful and torturous and so fucking good that he can't stand it. He literally couldn't stand if he tried, instantly, he would crumble back to his knees, wilting into himself, curling up, all divinely hurt.

Oh, God.

He wants it to be healed already. He wants Bucky to touch him again and not to do the aftercare for him like they already negotiated, he wants Bucky to touch him. He wants to cum. He wants to know how it feels when Bucky tugs on his piercing with his fingers and worries it between his teeth and the sound it makes when it hits against Bucky's metal hand. He wants the familiar rhythm of his tight fist and the new tink tink tink sound of metal on metal underneath it. He wants it. Of course, he cries 'cause it's overwhelming--all that ache--but he cries because he's already so frustrated by the healing process, too (typical Steve). He wants to touch it. More importantly, he just wants Bucky to touch it.

Please!

When they get home, Steve just cries harder, sobbing, barely restraining himself from thrusting, humping, and jerking his hips into frustratingly thin air when Bucky lays him out on his back on their bed, peeling his clothes off him, slow and gentle, to take a look at what they've just had done. Slithering between his spread thighs, Bucky's breath is hot and humid against his sweaty skin as he examines him up close and personal, using his strength to keep Steve's twitching thighs spread mortifying wide, making room for himself and his big shoulders. He doesn't touch. He just looks and expertly dodges Steve's wild, frantically bucking hips. Steve wants in his mouth so fucking bad. He's so achy and tender, it's all he wants. It wouldn't be long, he just--just for a second! He wants--

Please, please, please!

He knows he doesn't get to tell Bucky what to do, he doesn't get what he wants unless Bucky wants to give him what he wants but he can't help it! It's raw and molten hot and he feels so, so alive. He's a goddamn mess.

Uhh...

What?

I think I blacked out writing that. I'm not taking prompts yet, I still have a few weeks of school left for this year. But, um, clearly, this just hit the sadist in me too hard, and I couldn't resist.

As for the aftermath of a bell on Steve's pierced cock? Jesus Fucking Christ. Yes.

I don't think I can think about that without blacking out and going on another rant, so just know... Y-E-S. I agree.

[mha-cuties-pls]

Twerking

The girls from class 1A are getting dance lessons from an American exchange student before class one day.

Reader x Bakugou | Words: 1k | Rating: T (suggestive content) | genre: fluff

Staring at your classmate intently, you tried to decide if she was simply misspeaking, or actually asking you what she was asking you. "You want me to teach you how to do what?"

"You know," Ururaka said, beginning to shake her butt and arms almost robotically from side to side, "’tweaking’. The dance? You're from America, so I assume all you guys know how to do that!"

Oooh. A smile took over your expression as you finally realized. "Ah, you mean twerking!" Giving your classmates a small laugh, you tried to explain, "Tweaking is a whole other thing, and its not a positive one." Since transferring to UA from overseas, you had often found yourself at the mercy of language blocks and mispronunciations that led to misunderstandings, so for once, it was nice to be the one in their own element.

“I’ve always been curious as to how to do that, as well.” Yaoyarozu chipped in, garbing small nods of agreement from the rest.

Laughing playfully, you shrugged, getting up from your desk and turning so your back was to them; You had 15 minutes before your next class so you had some time to kill, anyways. “I have to warn you guys it’s not like I’m any expert when it comes to this, but,” straightening the back of your legs and planting your heels firmly on the ground you bent over slightly, “I do have this one trick a friend taught me last time I visited during break!” Swinging your butt side to side while doing this caused your butt to bounce pretty steadily and noticeably under your uniform skirt, which naturally hiked up because of the action. “All you have to do is straighten your legs, stand on your heels, and then kind of shake your hips steadily in place and your butt does the rest.”

All the girls immediately started shouting with excitement upon seeing how easy it could be. They all spread out a bit, with determined smiles as they remembered my short tutorial. I laughed with them, watching the beginning struggles of every dancer morphing into a rhythm of understanding after a few minutes of trial and error.

“Hey, I’m doing it!” Uruaka exclaimed, giggling a bit herself while standing next to Mina who seemed to be getting the hang of it herself.

Yayorozu, however, still seemed to be inhibiting herself, making stiff and robotic movements. “I don’t think I understand.”

I walked over to her with a smile, remembering how long it took me to learn until I had someone explain it to me. “Nah it’s an easy fix, watch.” Standing so I was facing the same way as her, I assumed the same stance only remained straight up. I started twisting my hips bluntly to illustrate the motion. “You see?” I then slowly began to bend at the waist, the shaking of my lower body then translating into the dance easily. “Its just like your twisting, but stopping and going so fast your using the momentum of your fat against it to make it you know,” you trailed off, feeling sort of silly for explaining the mechanics of twerking, “more jiggly.”

Finally seeming to fall into a rhythm, Yayarouzu was doing it! Albeit with a terribly determined and focused expression on her face. “I believe I’ve got it!”

Simply laughing, you cheered her on, “Ayy, go Momo!” Catching the attention of your other classmates they began to cheer her on as well. A chorus of “go Momo! Go Momo!” Began, and I joined her, shooting her an electric smile as she laughed along with me. It looked like she was finally starting to let loose a little bit and just have fun with it, making your heart warm. You were so grateful for all the friendships you’ve made since coming to UA.

You had all been so lost in concentration and just having a good time, you didn’t realize your 15 minutes had ended already and the door had opened.

Iida, never one to be late, burst through the door promptly at 12:45, but instantly froze upon what he saw before him. The rest of the 1A guys followed not far behind, wondering why he was just standing there and wasn’t rushing to his seat like usual.

“Hey what are you doing blocking the way?” Bakugou said, eyes squinting. As he approached Iidas frozen body, he followed his gaze, instantly growing a bit pink in the process. “What the hell?!”

Bakugous loud exclamation, like always, reverberated through the classroom and instantly stopped you all dead in your tracks. Looking behind you, you saw the boys of class 1A all staring at the group of you; who all were bent over with their backs towards them and your skirts admittedly high.

“Aah, perverts!” Higakure yelped, jumping up from her position. “How long have you guys been standing there?!”

But, based on Minetas nose bleed, you assumed it was longer than just a second. Meaning that they most likely got a pretty good show of you all going at it because hey, you had to admit to yourself, you were a pretty good teacher.

All the girls immediately flushed almost in unison, most of them quickly scurrying back to their seats while mumbling lame excuses and adverting eye contact.

But, even though you were burning red you had to take this opportunity to tease Bakugou just a bit, and instead winked at him before sauntering back to your seat; You even hiked up your skirt before you sat down, the fabric barely covering the top of your thighs as you sat. And you knew Bakugous eyes followed every move as he moved into a seat diagonally behind yours.

Pretending to be interested in getting ready for class, you began to pull out your textbook, when your phone lit up from the corner of your desk.

“I’m gonna fuck that stupid smirk right off your pretty little face tonight.” The text from Bakugou read.

Now, it was your turn to blush, and you frantically lowered the brightness on your phone while looking around to make sure no one saw what was just on your screen.

Bakugou snickered from a few seats away, and kept his eye on you, enjoying making you squirm with anticipation at his words. He sent one more text as the rest of the students filtered into their seats and Aizawa was about to begin.

“And you’re definitely gonna shake that ass for me in private tonight 😈 I wanna see it up close.”

xxx

A/N: just a little thought I had about the tweak vs twerk thing and it turned into a Bakugou fluff at the end LOL who would’ve guessed it

[hawkepockets]

thoughts/headcanons abt dao party body types…

morrigan is skinny, gangly, tough, and rangy from life in the wilds. she has sharp shoulders, stick-out shoulderblades, pointy joints, knobby long-fingered hands, a flat chest. she could be built like a ballerina, except that she doesn’t practice flexibility or grace. which makes her obviously graceless and brittle. the same height as alistair, annoyingly.

alistair is a big-boned, broad-shouldered, strong young man, inclined to beefiness, pudge, and nice boobs… except that he’s always been underfed and has now contracted the taint, so his strength is kind of wasting and drooping on his frame. a sad little belly… slightly pointed ears, just enough to mark him as a shifty character to the eye of a suspicious bigot, without being definitely elvhen.

leliana is plush, pear-shaped, and curvy with big (deadly) thighs and a heart shaped face. her arms have unexpected wiry strength, and her hands are hard. she loses a lot of her healthy fat & rosiness between dao & dai, becoming more rumpled, spindly and birdlike. SAD.

zevran is a beautiful, cat-footed rogue who can charm the rich and classy, so he’s fat and deceptively soft, apple shaped with dainty hands and feet and very strong calves from jumping and climbing. he moves very quietly and springily. medium height for an elf, short king by human standards. long, elegant ears.

wynne is a classroom skeleton. wynne is a folded up ironing board in circle robes. wynne is a murphy bed. wynne is a coffin lid. wynne is taller and more imposing than you expected from a distance. extremely straight, stern posture and big hands that she’s taken good care of. nothing about her bowed or crabbed by age. even her wrinkles are straight lines.

oghren has a beer belly and broad, hairy hands, but by dwarven standards he’s kind of small and slender.

melantho is tiny, much smaller than any of the humans, but to call her “lithe” or “willowy” because she’s an elf would be a joke. her sister is lithe and willowy. mela is a compact, unyielding mass of gristle and bone. no ass, no tits. the taint was already taking hold of her on the road to ostagar, and though its grip on her loosened with the joining she bears its marks—sunken eyes, clawed fingers and toes, blackened extremities, a fevered metabolism that melts away any remaining baby fat and keeps her cranky and cold, a slinking step, sensitivity to light. big, kitten-like ears.

sten is stacked like a sumo wrestler. best tits in the party, easily.

matsendra is bigger than mela but still pretty short with a fat, rounded hourglass figure. like zevran, he has a well-fed, satisfied, domesticated look, but unlike zev he’s not prepared for any chases or parkour. he is genuinely as used to soft living as he looks. with time away from the circle he firms up and gains a subtle, intimidating glow of strength and control, but never gets slimmer. for an elf he has smaller, rounder ears—one torn half off by the demon torpor—and unusually thick facial & body hair.

loghain is actually built very, very similarly to alistair, in a more advanced stage—a big frame that should be filled out, but miserable, ascetic living has stooped his shoulders and hollowed his gut, making him look older than he is.

velanna is an inverted triangle, a corn chip, a captain america. big shoulders, trim waist, tight butt. very disciplined. when she slouches in annoyance it’s artful, poised, and a little hard to believe.

nathaniel looks like a line cook. clammy, jittery, skinny, ugly defined abs, diet of mostly smoke. much much too tall. too tall by far. hunched, self-conscious body language. has erratic bursts of strength in which he can toss oghren like a sack of flour.

sigrun is a full and sexy hourglass!! but she’s all the way down there and wearing legion armor, so you don’t even know. you don’t even get to know how perfect she is.

justice is dead, and squishes like rotten fruit if you touch him. very big, looks as tall as nathaniel but that’s because nate has bad posture. actually slightly shorter. twice as wide.

anders is spare and kind of attenuated, like he’s been spread thin by stress, with an unusually long, slender torso, long arms, and short legs. his hands & feet are a little too big for his limbs, like a stray cat used to fighting, but his touch—whether healing, hurting, or grasping in passion—is gentle, firm, and clinical.

shale is shale.

and most of them are trans.

…………… TO ME❗️

[shojislady]

2. SO SCANDALOUS

"-ess.. princess. wake up, we need to get ready. kacchans making pancakes right now."

grumbling, she turns over to look at her clock. it's 10:15am, izuku let her sleep in a bit. today, the class was going out to the mall then the arcade to have class bonding time. with everything that's gone on, from the USJ incident and the tension from the sports festival, to the fight with stain (where endeavor unfairly took credit, causing the girl to have a "slight" hatred for him), and even the final exams, having to go against All Might with Bakugo and Midoriya, it was just a lot to handle. they're just kids, and kids need breaks.

walking into the bathroom, the girl began her daily morning routine.

"damn.. i look ROUGH..!" she said as she looked in the mirror. her bonnet looked as if it was trying to run away, her tank top was all twisted up, right boob was up in russia while the left one stayed home in america. she had eye boogers all around and her angel bite piercings were no where to be found.

she slept good.

"you know what... let me just wash my face right now and i'll do everything else after i eat."

her face care routine consists of ; black african soap, witch hazel, hydration drops, and a bit of coco butter.

finishing up and putting away her stray boobs, she found one of bakugos stolen hoodies and made her way downstairs.

(i would just like to add that she sleeps in boxers so yk that ass lookin fat 😋)

"good morning guys!" she greeted everyone, with a slight smile and wave. almost everyone was up, with the exception of a few people.

"hii y/n!"

"mornin bestie!!"

"Good Morning, Y/n! Glad to see you awake!"

and so on and so forth

"mornin angel.. im making your pancakes right now, but there's bacon on the tiny burner and i made u a tiny omelette. those burner thingies really come in handy, you know?"

"its a heating tray, katsu. and yes, that's why i bought them." she bought them for holidays like christmas and american thanksgiving, but since there's 21 kids living in one dorm, it's used more than expected.

"is that my fucking hood?? i've been looking for that for weeks!" bakugo exclaimed, turning around to give the girl a plate so that she could fix her food. "when the hell did you even- whatever.. as long as i get it back."

(Spoiler Alert, he doesn't)

"erm.. anyways..! so guys, what time are we supposed to be leaving??" asked y/n, going to take a seat next to shoji.

"Well, we're trying to leave for the mall around 12:45 since it isn't far, then leave the mall no later than 4:30-5." yaomomo began to explain. "I was able to rent the arcade from 6:15 to 10:30, food and drinks included, along with lazer tag , and we get the option of going in the bounce area, so when we get there just let me know."

"damn yaomomo... i knew you was stacked but DAMN!!"

"ong, bro's LOADED.."

"i'm calling you if i need to bailed out of jail."

"honestly guys it's not much, i just want us to have fun and relax as a class while being safe!" yaomomo said with a small smile on her face. she was literally loaded, like pockets so deep they could fit 3 gallons of milk each, pockets so swole they need an ice pack, pockets so fat they need they own TLC show type rich. but even so, she didn't like to flaunt her wealth. she'd rather use her money to pay for gifts and events for her friends, rather than to flex some diamond earrings or a gold necklace. She's still a teen girl though, so she still loves to go shopping. The girl is really just happy that she's found friends that actually love her for her, and not for her money.

"you're so cute yaomomo! i love you!"

"well thank you y-"

"if anyone, i mean ANYONE fucks with you, call me. these hands are rated E for Everyone. my fists are activists. i dont care if they're old, young, tall, short, fine, ugly, gay, straight. I believe in equality, and with equality comes equally distributed ass whoopings jus-"

"OK, n/n! i think momo gets how much you love her! since you're done eating can u help me?" midoriya interrupted the girls small rant.

"you gotta face the consequences of last night huh? you should've listened to me, but yeah i'll help!"

"you dont have to rub salt on the wound!" he whined. "i'll get stuff and meet in your room again?"

"sounds like a plan, izuku!" she replied, getting up to grab her plate and bring to the kitchen.

"OoOh y/n~" jirou began to tease. "last night? your room AGAIN? what scandalous activities have you been up to?"

"chill kyo, its not like that! he messed up his hair on his own and we always hang in my room bc its more.. welcoming.. then his."

"i know, y/n! im jus messin' with ya."

with her plate in hand, y/n walked into the kitchen where bakugo resided. he was cleaning and putting away the dirty plates before he started to soak the pans.

"so, the nerd fell asleep in your room again huh?" he asked, washing a plate.

"yeah, he started to doze off a little while after you left, so he slept with me."

"i dont know why you guys dont just ask eachother out yet. you two are basically in love with eachother."

"katsuki, you know how i feel, and you know how zuku is. im pretty sure if he would act the same way with the rest of the class as he acts with us if he just trusted them more." she informed, getting ready to wash her plate before bakugo snatched it.

"don't even try it." ever since they could crawl, they've never let the girl lift a finger. hungry? chef katsuki at your service! scraped your knee? Dr.deku to the rescue! and yes, they know that she's the perfectly capable and well off to do these things on her own, but why should she when she has two men to do it for her?

"anyways. we've all known eachother since literally birth. i see things, i observe things. you two are literally inseparable. im pretty sure y'all first words were eachothers names. you know how you act around him, you see with your own two (or four) eyes the way he acts with you, and im pretty sure he peeps it too. just ask eachother out already and stop being pussies for fucks sake!"

"oh my gosh?? shut the fuck up?? you're so damn loud??" she said, slapping him in the back of his neck.

"aye. try me again and we gotta tussle. i'm not deku. i'll will beat the black off you. i strike so much fear into your melanin pigmentation that it will come to me."

"whatever katsuki, u can run me my ones later, i gotta go help zuku now."

"ight then angel, u better be ready. see ya later."

with that, she finally left the kitchen and headed towards her dorm to meet izuku.

.*•

"finally.." the boy sighed. it's now 11:45 am, and they (she) just finished detangling, moisturizing, and somewhat styling his hair. at this point, her fingers and wrists were tired, her back was aching, her feet were sore, and she had the very violent urge to go back to her black roots and pop this nigga with the comb.

"I know damn well YOU not heavy breathing like you did some work. all yo lazy ass did was sit there and watch Netflix. YOU COULDN"T EVEN HOLD THE DAMN SPRAY..."

"I'm sorry, ma. thank you so much, I should've listened to you last night. now do you already have clothes ready? or do you need to pick something out?" he asked, pulling her into a hug and rubbing her back.

".. you better be so lucky i love you. but yes, i need to pick. have u chosen?"

" yup, right before I came to wake you up. so i'll help you if you want?"

"yes please"

taglist: @ast4rg1rl

I FINALLY DID IT YALL..

and i already started the next chapter🙏🏾

well i split this chapter up into 2 to make things easier on me and y'all!!

so if its not out by next week then i'll post something embarrassing 🙏🏾

BUT ILL BE IN DUBAI FOR A WHILE SO JULY 13th IS MY DEADLINE

anywho

when i show outfits and stuff they're just there for ppl like me who can't visualize that well <3

WELL

UNTILL NEXT TIMEE

[yourlittlevirus]

The Guardian, December 11, 1991.

“With her long pale form, blonde tangle and scarlet pout, Courtney Love is the ideal candidate for male journalists seeking another broken siren for their catalogue. Men, it seems, have trouble with her.

Love sings, screeches and plays a vicious guitar with Hole, the latest, hippest rock 'n' roll thing to come out of Los Angeles. Their name comes from Euripides' Medea ("Come flame of the sky/Pierce through my head!") and warnings to Love from her mother "not to carry a hole around inside me just because I suffered a problematic childhood."

Currently on tour, Hole's debut album, Pretty On The Inside, topped the independent charts earlier this year and sent the music press into lip-smacking frenzies over such lines as, "Is she rotten on the inside, ugly from the back."

But while Love may rattle with conflict, she's just a normal woman, telling it like it is.

"It's not on purpose," says Love of her graphic use of physical imagery. "But writing songs has a lot to do with your sexuality. I danced for a while and just being around that made me aware of what people use. And if you grow up blessed with a certain beauty or a certain intelligence that enhances your beauty, you can get into a better position in life."

Years of being fat brought this home to Love. "When you're fat, no one looks you in the eye, they think you're bitter and ranting. Personally it makes me hate those people."

Despite her abhorrence of such physical prejudices, Love realised the advantages of a svelte outline once she'd decided to make music. After a rootless childhood spent travelling across America and New Zealand with hippy parents, a role in Alex Cox's Straight To Hell and a short spell singing with San Francisco rock band Faith No More, Love deliberately settled in the creative void of LA and began searching for women who shared her taste for a more subversive expression. She eventually went for Caroline Rue on drums, Jill Emery on bass and, surprisingly, Eric Erlandson on guitar.

"The pool of women to play with is small. I've kicked girls out of this band for playing too much like guys. Even Eric plays like a girl. Girls' playing is compassion and rage, and it can also be ugly and jarring. To deny my femininity and just rock out like a guy would not be part of evolution. At school, women are discouraged from learning maths but when it comes to writing good songs, you need maths. You can't just do it primally."

Her tattered beauty image is as much a part of Love's peculiar femininity as is her playing. Her smeared eyeliner and torn baby doll dresses have earned her the status of a wayward Cinderella. In truth, she simply likes pretty things, but her inner conflict between a desire for adornment and a feminist ideology tempts her to make a mockery of girlhood trappings. "I'm not embarrassed about being a feminist and I'm not opposed to pretty dresses. On the other hand, girls are supposed to like pretty things and I don't want to do what I'm supposed to."

Like all women, Courtney Love is confused. She doesn't pretend to have any answers, but she is not the lost, vulnerable creature many have intimated. This woman wants to kill rockstars, open for Guns 'n Roses and "have 50,000 people throw shit at me". She wants to wrench open the attitudes towards women in the predominantly white male game of rock 'n' roll. "The American male runs half the global world and grows up on rock music from day one. If you can alter the psyche of someone who's growing up to be a rapist or a total misogynist, you're creating values and instead of making the void bigger, you're making it smaller."

With Madonna's lawyers currently pursuing Hole's legal representatives in the hope of signing the band to the pop icon's new label, and virtually every major record company queuing up to breakfast, lunch and dine her, Courtney Love looks set for stardom.”

[legally-a-bastard]

i sent a long with citations response to the strawberry shortcake post but hello! historical food enjoyer?? :)

YEAG

mostly from a standpoint of ‘i like seeing how foods have evolved and spread and adapted, and Why’ esp with a focus on where a food Originated from and then going from there, but not quite as much specific-recipe-based

MOST of my knowledge is specifically soups and stews bc I am obsessed with them and I am on a quest to collect as many recipes as possible. one of my favorites will always be a traditional Hungarian goulash that takes, like, eight million hours to cook/hyp

Food is very important to me (very very large family who are all very very big on cooking and baking) and it sort of merged with my interest of history

Also-I was gonna reply On the strawberry shortcake post abt it but figured I shouldn’t further clog OP’s notifs lmfao. so, my thoughts on the strawberry shortcake thing (putting a readmore bc this about to get long cause I’m full of Words):

Good Housekeeping 1933 is one of my own sources-it’s one of the few actual Book cookbooks we have in my house, but I do admit that most recipes I know for shortcake are handwritten ones we keep in one of the two Very Large Binders Full Of Recipes (of varying degrees of age-some are no older than 20 and some are from my great great grandmother) collected by my mother from culinary classes, family members, etc.

Some of the recipes (both my own collection and your citations) I do sort of raise my eyebrows at (no sweetening at all????? Bestie what?? bro must be throwing a shitload of strawberry on that thing)

Before this post I genuinely didn’t know people used Straight Up Actual Biscuits for strawberry shortcake, whcih prompted me to go looking through the recipes (I did in fact find a few that were definitely more of a biscuit and one that was just. Muffin as a substitute??? I guess????) and also take a look into the general history of shortcake, & strawberry shortcake

I’ve usually only ever seen them actually made with just normal cake (never has the right texture imo) or with actual shortcake

So what I’m Gathering is:

there seem to be three types of strawberry shortcake: regular cake, just a biscuit, and actual shortcake.

As the name suggests, it should be made with actual shortcake; a type of cake characterized by a thick dough-like batter and crumbliness similar to a biscuit. The ‘short’ part is in reference to the high amount of fats(typically butter) which give it the crumbling texture, which it has in common with biscuits/scones. But, traditionally, shortcake IS made with eggs and sugar, and is still a batter rather than dough (if you have achieved dough then you have in fact just made a really sweet biscuit). To me, biscuits, shortcakes/shortbreads, and scones are all just siblings. They’re very similar but they’re still they’re own separate things.

I believe the earliest shortcake recipe we know is from a 1588 English cookbook; it reached popularity the in the early 1600s(largely due to a Shakespeare play, in fact! In “The Merry Wives of Windsor”, there is a character named Alice Shortcake!). Strawberry shortcake itself was a popular type of fruit & shortcake dessert by the time of the Victorian era, and then becoming popularized in America (they used to have straight up strawberry shortcake PARTIES apparently! as a celebration of the fruit harvest in summer!! That’s sick as fuck I wanna do that!!! I think some places might still do it but I do not think it’s any around here lmfao)

also fun fact June 14 is national strawberry shortcake day

Anyways. Um yeah that’s it for my shortcake knowledge. do you have a favorite soup?