#amazon bad but man my will to live has been restored

[cheeseknives]

Hey now, what, why does he look so fine here ????

[mst3kproject]

Thor and the Amazon Women

Although the title sounds like some kind of incredibly bloated and dreary Marvel/DC crossover movie, this is actually the crummy Maciste flick that appeared over the opening credits of Cave Dwellers. The director, Antonio Leonviola, also made previous Episodes that Never Were Mole Men Against the Son of Hercules and Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops. Those both sucked in ways that really weren't even any fun, so this is probably going to hurt.  I apologize in advance for the truly appalling picture quality... I think this movie has been copied and recopied more times than the Star Wars Holiday Special.

The Queen of the Amazons receives a prophecy that her rule will be ended by a man so powerful he will defeat a hundred and one of her troops without even using a weapon!  She decides she needs to get this guy before he can get her, and after getting some tips from her prisoners, sends a party out to find him.  They locate the mighty hero Thor and wound him but are unable to capture him – instead, they imprison young Princess Tamar, daughter of the king the Amazon Queen deposed years ago.  Thor is nursed back to health by his cowardly friend Ubaratutu, and they set out to free Tamar, who has been forced to train as a gladiatrix, and fulfill the prophecy by bringing peaceful rule back to the land of Byblos.

So as I noted, this is my third Antonio Leonviola sword-and-sandal movie, and third time was definitely not the charm.  Amazon Women is by far the most racist, most sexist, and generally least entertaining of the lot.

Long ago I noted that Maciste films have a preponderance of tyrannical Evil Queens versus wise and fair Good Kings, as if the entire genre were preoccupied with the idea that women are incapable of rule.  At the time, I wondered if this were just because those were the films MST3K happened to pick, but I've seen a lot more of them now and yeah, turns out that's a thing.  Thor and the Amazon Women is particularly explicit about it, stating the philosophy out loud, repeatedly, through characters who are also women.

One notable moment of this comes at the climax, when Princess Tamar is wounded and believes she is dying.  Her adoptive father, her brother, and Thor, all urge her to live so that she can return to the throne and restore peace.  She replies that this is not a woman's job, but is in the hands of her twelve-year-old brother (whose name I never managed to decipher, but sounds a bit like 'Amoke'), who is clearly far more fit to rule than she.  At the end we see that she has survived after all, but that Amoke is king, and has made his friend Lulee his queen.  Lulee grew up among the Amazons and might have expected to wield some power in her own right, but seems quite content with this ending.

(I'm pretty sure Amoke and Lulee were dubbed by the same person, a grown woman doing a squeaky 'kid' voice.  Being as there are two of them, this is twice as annoying as in movies like Pod People that do it only once.)

That's not even the worst of it, though.  Earlier, a couple of the gladiatrices met to discuss overthrowing the queen, and they agreed that the rule of women is unnatural and that they were happier when they were subservient to their husbands!  At another point, Thor tells the queen that rule requires the use of force, which is natural to men but unnatural to women.  In other Maciste movies, the idea that women are naturally submissive was an undercurrent, possibly something the writers weren't even thinking about.  In Thor and the Amazon Women it is front and centre.

If this movie has a raison d'être besides telling the women in the audience to get back in the kitchen, it's showing the men in the audience scenes of women in skimpy outfits fighting each other to the death.  There are quite a few of these, and they are stunningly bad.  There's no fight choreography and none of these actresses look like they've ever picked up a sword or spear before in their lives.  If you told me the first time they handled the prop weapons was the day of shooting, I would believe you.  Of course, none of the actresses are at all muscular because that might be perceived as unfeminine... and I guess if the fight scenes were actually good the male audience might feel threatened instead of turned on.  At least it's kinda funny when they theatrically 'die' with an opponent's spear tucked under one arm like kids on a playground.

So there's the sexism.  The racism is brought to us by Ubaratutu and the Queen of the Amazons, both of whom are black.  The former is an absolute buffoon, who calls Thor 'master', expresses cowardice at every opportunity, and makes stupid decisions in the name of comic relief.  The latter is a cruel tyrant who suppresses dissent with merciless torture and bloodshed, and who we're told has repeatedly married men, spent a few days fucking them, and then had them killed when she gets tired of them – this was almost Ubaratutu's fate. Mole Men Against the Son of Hercules had Bangor, a similar black sidekick character, but treated him with slightly less contempt.  If you watch the movies in the order of their release (Atlas, then Mole Men, then Amazon Women) it's as if you can see Leonviola growing more and more bigoted over the course of the 1960s!

Some Maciste-type movies at least have nice sets and costumes for us to look at while all this bullshit goes on – even Nobody Named Atlas Goes Anywhere Near the Land of the Cyclops had that.  Thor and the Amazon Women must have had much less money behind it, because nearly the whole thing is filmed in a cave.  The opening credits thank the Yugoslavian government for allowing them to film in the Postojna cave system, and it's their only location.  I am not exaggerating when I say there isn't a single building in the entire film.  The shepherding people who raised Tamar and Amoke appear to live in tents in the wilderness.  They literally couldn't afford sets.

It appears to have been very cold in those caves, too... you can see the actress' breath in a couple of scenes.  It must have sucked wearing those off-the-shoulder minidresses in there.

There's only one thing going on in this movie that really had the potential to be interesting, and that's the way the Queen (who never has a name as far as I can tell – IMDB just calls her 'the Black Queen') brings about her own downfall in the attempt to prevent it. This is a theme associated mostly with Greek tragedy, most famously Oedipus, and suggests that the will of the gods is inevitable. The Oracle's warning leads the Queen to look for Thor in the hope of destroying him before he can destroy her.  Her troops fail to capture him but bring back Tamar, and it is the need to rescue Tamar that brings Thor to the Queen's domain.  If she'd left him alone, he would never have known about her.

When the Queen finally does have Thor in her power, she decides to put him to the test – the oracle said that he would be able to overcome a hundred and one of the Queen's warriors using only the strength of his hands.  The intelligent thing for the Queen to do would have been just to kill him, since he matches the prophecy in every other detail and she's got complete power over him in that moment.  Instead, she does indeed devise a test that pits him against a hundred and one of her best troops, not in battle but in a game of tug-of-war!  She could at least have tried to rig things by throwing one extra warrior in there or something.

This is why Oedipus works, and things like Thor and the Amazon Women do not.  Oedipus never makes a stupid mistake – his mistakes were made under circumstances when he could not have been expected to know better.  He just keeps pursuing the truth, even as his wife begs him to leave well enough alone.  Characters like the Queen of the Amazons have to do a series of dumb things despite having obvious better options, and therefore are destroyed not by the inevitability of divine will but by the equal inevitability of human stupidity.  I suppose we're meant to think she was actually destroyed by her hubris, but if she felt that secure on her throne why was she even worried about Thor in the first place?

The idea that the bad guys get the hero's attention by seeking to destroy him first is a common one in Maciste-type movies.  It kind of needs to be, because in many cases the plots have to find a way to bring the hero to a distant land and get him involved in a situation that really has nothing to do with him.  The prophecy thing is just the easiest way to do so, and in many cases I suspect this is the main thing the writers were thinking about.  They weren't actually interested in Greek tragedy, they were just being lazy.

Man, this movie sucks.  Remember the minute-and-a-half or so of footage from this that appeared in Cave Dwellers and mostly showed Thor and Ubaratutu wandering in some woods somewhere?  You can consider that Thor and the Amazon Women's highlight reel. Everything on screen here is absolute garbage.

[thisdiscontentedwinter]

2 days until Elf Defence!

Meanwhile, here’s a sneak peek at the first chapter: 

“To be fair,” Benji said as Duke Klaus of Tournel plummeted down the side of the tower and hit the ground with a sickening splat, “that was mostly gravity's fault.”

Calarian leaned over the edge of the tower and inspected the impact zone far, far below. He wrinkled his nose in distaste. “This is a terrible beginning to this quest!”

Benji shrugged and inspected his fingernails, squinting in the sunlight.

Calarian sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Go to Tournel,” Quinn had said. “They’re the victim of mountain troll attacks, and the duke has asked for our assistance. Find out what’s happening, and report back to us.”

“Oh, and Calarian?” Loth had added in a tone far too casual to ring entirely true. “Why not take Benji with you?”

Calarian loved quests. He’d been playing Houses and Humans since he was a child, but the shine had somewhat worn off the game since he’d helped rescue Loth and Quinn from a dank cell and restored them to the throne of Aguillon after defeating Lord Doom. Well, he’d restored one of them, and the other one had just gone along for the ride. The point was, Calarian was much more interested in real quests these days, so an adventure with besieged dukes and rampaging mountain trolls? That had definitely piqued his interest even if, as Benji said, it made him a bootlicker and a class traitor for taking orders off parasitic human kings who only existed to prop up a corrupt feudalistic system that oppressed the working people and whose heads would be the first on pikes when the revolution came.

Benji tended to talk like that a lot.

In retrospect, Calarian wasn’t at all surprised that Loth and Quinn had wanted him to take Benji with him. Especially since Benji kept loudly insisting that he didn’t even want to live at the palace and was only staying to ensure Loth and Quinn didn’t devolve into despotic warlords who had been corrupted by power, and it definitely wasn’t because the beds were soft and the food was good and Calarian was there, and anyone who said that was the real reason was a liar.

Everything had gone well, at first. They’d taken a week to get from Callier, the capital of Aguillon, to Tournel. Duke Klaus, a hearty old man with fluffy white hair and a welcoming smile, had been very happy to receive them. He’d filled them in on the strange mountain troll attacks, and personally escorted them up to the top of the tower, where he’d leaned out to show them exactly where the last mountain troll had collided with the keep—which was right when Benji had sneezed behind him, causing him to overbalance and, well, splat.

And here they were.

“It could be worse,” Benji offered. He didn’t seem nearly bothered enough by the dead duke spread beneath them, in Calarian’s opinion.

“Worse? How could it possibly be worse?” Calarian demanded.

“Well, he could have grabbed my hand and taken me with him, and that would have been a real loss,” Benji said.

Calarian wondered for a split second if it was too late to shove Benji over the edge, but restrained himself. Collectivist anarchists didn’t, as a rule, murder members of their own collective. Besides, Benji did have certain redeeming features.

He pushed down his murderous impulses and said, “You know we were just supposed to help him with his mountain troll problem?”

Benji glanced over the edge of the parapet, and then back at Calarian. “Well then, we’ve succeeded. I mean, he doesn’t have a mountain troll problem anymore, does he?”

“Benji, you killed the duke.”

Benji held up his finger. “Accidentally! And I do actually feel a little bit bad about that.”

“Do you?”

Benji chewed his lower lip. “I mean, he seemed nice. For an oppressor of the people.”

“You don’t even like people!”

“That’s also true,” Benji said. He flicked a shank of black hair over his shoulder. “I don’t even like people, and I’m still fighting for their rights. That’s so selfless of me. I’m actually amazing.”

Preorder Elf Defence here on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08JD7Q9X7

And if you want to check out Red Heir, the first book, it’s on sale until Elf Defence comes out: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08BTJH8GF

@bunnywest​

[demonandangeltwins]

Ok but like imagine Stephanie Brown and Claire Novak as the same person like after Claire’s parents die she gets ‘adopted’ by Crystal and Arthur. Like Arthur killed the real Stephanie and Crystal went crazy so he took her from some group house or something.

When they start calling her Stephanie she decides that going by a different name would be better than Arthur beating her again.

Then when Arthur becomes Cluemaster. She doesn’t feel bad about becoming the bane of his existence as Spoiler ‘Enemy to criminals and People who hate Purple’ not one bit.

When she falls in love with the 2nd Robin she doesn’t tell him her real name. She tells him Spoiler. When he tells her he knows who she really is, she’s relieved when he says Stephanie Brown.

It was the first time she was relieved to hear the name.

When he dies she’s devastated she never told him her real name. She screams and crys and wants to vow to never love another. But Jason left her an ‘in case of my death’ note. Making her promise to not be alone.

She vows to not love lightly and to insure he would approve.

It doesn’t help when she falls in love next it’s with the criminal Red Hood. So she fights it and fights it and fights it. Jason would never tolerate The Red Hood much less approve of him or his methods.

Then Black Mask kidnaps and tortures her. But Hood saves her. Jason would like him. Even if he was to late.

Hood tries anyway rushes her to Leslie and begs her to live. When she asks why he cares so much he takes off the helmet and says “Because I love you.” She doesn’t get the chance to say it back to scold Jason about not telling her he was alive this whole time. In fact she doesn’t get to say anything because blood is pooling in her mouth. But she squeezes his hand 3 times to say ‘I love you too’ and he says he understands.

She hopes he writes something good for her grave.

When she wakes up she’s in a coffin 6ft. under and her gravestone says Stephanie Brown 2001-2018 ‘A light in the darkness of Gotham that inspired Kind Hearts.’ She didn’t get to read it until 5 years later.

When she dug herself out she was greated by a hand with a trench coat draped over the wrist. Cas had brought her back from hell. She almost didn’t want him too. Two years in hell meant her soul might be damaged beyond repair. He knew that but He saved her anyway.

Cas had tried to apologize for not being able to save her sooner but he had been in Purgatory with Dean. Then Heaven had controlled his mind. She said it was ok, that she was ok that she didn’t even remember hell.

She lied on both counts. He let her.

Cas brought her to Dean who in turn brought her to Rowena. The witch called in a favor with Ra’s Al Ghul. The Lazuras Pit healed her body and Rowena healed her soul.

But her mind was another thing. Magic and the mind don’t go together well. So she was left with the memories of hell and very little else. She didn’t remember Gotham or Spoiler or Jason. All she remembered was 2,400 years of hell. 1,500 years of being tortured. The first 400 of which demons wore Jason’s face to cause psychological harms along with the physical. 100 years of torturing later she didn’t know who he was beyond the face of a demon. 1,000 years later she didn’t recall him at all. Then she said yes. She picked up a blade and began 900 long years of ripping people apart. Of pain and screams and people begging for it to stop.

She was just happy it wasn’t her anymore.

That was what haunted her dreams the smile she bore as they bled, and burned, and cried.

The boys eventually took her to Soiux Falls, South Dakota to heal up. Jody and Alex set up her room. She hunted to pay penance. She killed Werewolves and Vampires, Witches and Demons. She killed the things that killed innocents.

She had a code.

She worked at the precinct for Jody. She got her high school diploma and started her Medical Degree to become a surgeon. Alex, Jody and the Winchesters were her family.

But she was missing something, someone.

She went to Ra’s trained as a league assassin. Became ‘Aleasfur’ (The Sparrow). She met Damien Al Ghul a Prince no older than 10 but with a battle strategy that outmatched most.

He looked familiar.

She didn’t find what she needed. So Ra’s released her “for now.”

She found Themyscira trained with Amazons and Goddesses.

She did not find what she needed.

After 5 years of searching for a way to heal her memory she went back to the first thing she remembered top-side. Her grave.

A man was setting purple flowers on her headstone. She had dyed her hair and changed so much he didn’t recognize her at first. She asked if he knew the person who was supposed to be in the coffin. He said he loved her. Then looked up, she knew the look had seen it before, the ‘I know you, You’re supposed to be dead’ look. When he stood up she almost ran but he hugged her before she could.

When The man hugged her she felt at home even though she had no memory of him. When he asked where she’d been she told him the truth. Told him of having only one memory of his voice saying “I love you.” Of trying to restore more of her memory by traveling the world only to be led back to the beginning.

‘Jason’ brought her to a place called Wayne Manor. Said “Alfie will help.” ‘Alfie’ injected her with a serum. As she passed out she realized how stupid she is to let a total stranger inject some drug into her arm.

When she woke up she remembered.

She remembered her parents, she remembered Arthur and Crystal, she remembered Bruce Wayne and Batman, she remembered Cass and Kara and Kate, she remembered Black Mask, she remembered Tim Drake-Wayne, Kon-el, Duke Thomas, and Dick Grayson. She remembered her friends and family.

But most of all she remembered Jason.

The taste of his lips, they feel of his hands on her thighs, the feel of his dick in her throat, the way he would talk so sweet as he nailed her so hard or the pull of her hair as he bent her over.

She remembered him.

How when they would read Jane Austen on rooftops he would bit his lower lip in concentration, or how right before he kissed her his nose would twitch, or when they first knocked someone out in one punch the other convinced Bruce to buy milkshakes.

She remembered everything.

The look frozen in time on his face, the shrapnel dug into his skin and the crowbar stuck in his head. She remembered every cut and bruise. She remembered the way her throat felt after screaming so hard she coughed up blood.

Then She remembered the Red Hood.

How it felt to betray Jason’s memory. How relieved she was when he took off the hood, how she died holding her lovers hand. How her last thought was that he would love someone else.

When she woke up everyone was there. Cass, Duke, Dick, Babs, Bruce, Kate, Kon-el, Tim, Harper, and Alfred.

And Jason could be found right next to her, holding her hand fast asleep with Titus at his feet.

When Jason woke up and everyone went to their own rooms he told her he broke their promise of loving again. That he couldn’t move on that he loved her still. She told him he might not after she told the truth about everything, about what she had been doing for the 5 years she’d been out of hell. About all the lies she told before she died. He promised it wouldn’t change the way he felt about her.

She explained everything hunting, heaven, her time in hell her new friends and family. And everything else.

Finally she told him her name. How it became hers and why she never told him. Then she told him that she understands if he can’t love her after everything but she will always love him and always has even when she didn’t remember him she missed him.

Then he said the one thing She had always wished for “I love you, Claire Novak.”

[shenandoahandback2021]

We got to Missouri and ended up new near Laura Ingall's Wilder house and decided to stop and see it.   It was very interesting and she had a very interesting life before she starting writing the books about that life. As luck would have it, there was a campground right across the road from the house. We spent a nice relaxing evening there is there and then headed East on route state 160 which was like a rollercoaster but nice driving and good pavement.   Sep 2    We found a campground that was only available for one night  on Thursday. It's a campground specifically designed for 4 wheelers to come and ride around in the wilderness. It's near the river and quiet hours don't start until midnight! The owners of the campground ask us to come over after we ate and visit with her friends and family.  It was an interesting visit. Her husband and a couple of the other guys are Civil War  Re-enactors. They have some interesting stories about incidences happen during some of their maneuvers.  In the morning we went over and spent a couple of hours chatting with some other people and had a great time but finally had to leave   Sep 3    We were close to Loretta Lynn's home place in Butcher Holler so we decided to go there. Getting there was a hoot and the road turn into a single lane road and there was no place to park for an RV. We drove past the house and turned around on a on a very narrow turnaround place. Wed were able to park parallel to the road. The house was very interesting and had most of the original furniture. Her 2 nieces gave the tours and they knew much more about a her than any person who had been schooled in it.  Since it was Friday night of the Labor Day weekend, we could not find a campground so we had to sleep in the Hardee’s parking lot.   Sep 4    We drove to the New River gorge National Park. There were no rooms at the end at the 1st two RV parks but we found a nice park across from a National Guard armory and decided to spend 2 nights. In the morning, we went to the New River Gorge National Park.  You can walk under the bridge, but there were no openings at the private company that ran the bridge walk.  The bridge is the longest single-arch bridge in the Western Hemisphere and the 3rd longest in the world.  It was the longest in the world for 26 years when first completed. We drove down to the bottom of the gorge and stopped on the way to look at the bridge construction. We drove over the river to the other side of the bridge and parked to come back and look at it from a different perspective.  The signs said the road was not recommended for RVs or trailers, but when we parked on the other side of the river there were school busses and trailers carrying raft equipment for people who raft down the river down the river. We met a group from Raleigh and New Jersey who commented that they were looking at a Leisure Travel Van to purchase so we showed them ours.  At 1st we didn't know they were from Raleigh but when we found out I told them I had graduated from NC State. One gentleman, Clive, had graduated from state and the other man was from New Jersey. They had a Chinese grandmother with them along with the Chinese wives from New York City and we had a great conversation. I showed them my lifetime membership to the NC STATE student union.  The grandmother said when you come to Raleigh again you must come visit and I said be careful what you ask for. You only have to give me your address. I gave them my card but we haven't heard from them.   Next day.    We had two things on our minds for the next day and decided to drive down to an old abandoned coal mine. Again it said the road was not suitable for RVs, but I stopped at the last leg of the trip and asked the man living there if our RV could make the trip. He looked it over said, ”Yup” because he drives his oversized pickup truck down there often to the river. It was an interesting drive and we had to blow our horn around a couple of the curves to make sure no one ran into us. Sure enough one curve had someone coming around and she heard our horn and stopped before we smacked into each other. Her little Chevy would have been a hood ornament on the Mercedes. It was a pretty interesting drive all the way and when we were 100' from the parking lot there was a pothole on the left side. I decided to go a little bit right to miss that instead of slowing down too much and there was a rock hidden in the grass and it tore out our steps from the side door. We were able to tie the mangled steps up to the frame to drive back out of the area. I stopped and told the man who said that RV would go there that we lost the steps. He was apologetic but I told him it was not his fault.  I asked if he knew someone who had a torch that I could get to cut the mangled steps off so we could continue our trip. He said to pull over front of my white truck there. As I drove over to it, I noticed that he had cutting torches on the back of his truck and he was a welder. How lucky can you be when you are so unlucky to start with. He cut the mangled steps off and we discovered that he had trained to be a tanker at Ft Knox after I had been there. We had a nice talk and he wouldn’t take any pay for the work. We went back to the campground and worked on the minor metal damage under the door. The motor was still working but it had nothing to move. I think I'll leave the body damage alone to remind me of my situation. There was plenty of room to make the drive I just had a 50-50 decision and went right instead of left. At least I can buy a new set of steps on Amazon and put them on when I get home. There are only 4 bolts holding the step mechanism is up to the frame.   Next day    We drove down to the end of the gorge and turned back up to the Sandstone Falls that are part of the National Park. There is a boardwalk that you can walk out to see them and it's a very interesting area. We met a nice couple from Virginia Beach, Ted and Julinne on the way out there. They have been thinking about buying an RV like ours to start traveling with in a couple of years. They were very interesting couple and had traveled a bit already. We invited them to have a cup of coffee with us because it was coffee time and we ended up spending 2 and a 1/2 hours discussing the RV, traveling what’s to see in Virginia et cetera. We hope we hear from them again and they said they would to ask us more information about the RV. On the way in we had seen an RV park on the river so we went back to that and stopped because it was getting late. We got a spot there for the night and it was very peaceful on the river.   Next day    We had morning fog below the ridge line call my but it was very nice and we had a relaxing start to the morning. We headed toward the north end of the Shenandoah Valley National Park. We got within 2 hours of my cousins house and her 3 daughters before we stopped for the night. I contacted them by phone and I thought by text but the text didn't work. We spent the night in a Walmart parking lot because there were no openings at the nearby RV parks.   Next day    We had given up seeing my cousins because I had not heard back from them, but in the morning, they called me and said please come by. We went to Ashburn, Virginia to see them and were able to park in the driveway. We had a good 3 hour or so visit is and they decided to go for a late lunch at one of their favorite restaurants. It was an old barn converted to a restaurant and it added on to it with different venue spaces and had several bars. In one bar they had carriages hanging from the ceiling from different eras. When we got back to the house about 5, I said guess we'll be going now try to get somewhere before it got too late. They said the traffic will be pretty bad and said why don't you spend the night. We said, well if you don't mind we'd love to. They have a 5-bedroom, 5,500 ft² house on 3 levels to the head plenty of room. We stayed up watching the news and then the US Open tennis matches and talking until midnight when I suspect they usually go to bed pretty early. I had not visited with my cousin or her family except for a funeral for her brother and we didn't get to visit very much then.  The three sisters have been living together for several years, at least 20, I think.  When their dad died a few years ago, my cousin, their mother came to live with them. Everyone has their own bedroom and bath and private space.  There is a suite downstairs with a gigantic screen TV with a Projector. We had that suite last night. After a late breakfast and lots more stories, we headed down to the Skyline Drive for the Shenandoah National Park. It was a beautiful drive part way down the Park until we decided to stop at KOA for the night.   Next day  We arrived at the Luray Caverns and spent most of the day there. We had a very nice visit at Luray caverns, very relaxing. It is an interesting cave, unlike any we have seen. The formations are striking and many stalagmites have come together with the stalactites. It is a very easy walk through the caverns on a paved walkway that is non slippery. They have an antique vehicle museum with all types of vehicles calls from buggies to Rolls Royce’s. They also have a Pioneer replica village set up that has many buildings from the surrounding area that were taken down and completely restored in this village. When we got back to the RV, there was a nice young couple next to us that we struck up a conversation with and ended up talking to them for about an hour. The husband is a pastor at the local Hispanic church and he is also a computer Tech for the IRS for his regular job. His daughter plays the flute and his wife sings and leads the church choir. They are from Puerto Rico and most of the family have come here to be with them. They came here 21 years to go to live 5 years or so and go to school. He was a police officer in Puerto Rico. When we got back to the KOA for the night, a couple we had met our first day stopped to speak to us and we had a drink and talked for an hour or so. They said they were sorry they didn't get to say goodbye to us this morning not knowing we would be back tonight. We didn't know we were going to be back tonight until we got to the caverns and decided we should stay another night to relax. It's lucky that we called as soon as we decided, because the campground is full tonight. We just enjoyed some homemade fudge from a small shop in the Luray Caverns Village.    

[fourteendaysinaweek]

Show Recommendations

Grimm

Platform: Amazon Prime

Official overview: Portland detective Nick Burkhardt, descended from a long line of warriors known as Grimms, defends his city from magical creatures known as Wesen, which are part human and part animal. Fighting alongside his partner, Hank, colleague Sergeant Wu and friends Monroe and Rosalee, Nick faces off against internal and external forces, including his police captain, Sean Renard.

My overview: Portland detective Nick Burkhardt thinks he's going insane when he randomly starts seeing monsters at the time his aunt goes into a coma. Turns out he's not, in fact, going crazy. He deals with shit trying to kill him and his girlfriend and friends CONSTANTLY and in reality all he wants to do his keep his city safe, and he accidentally saves the world in the process.

Thoughts on the show: I love it, it does have a habit of setting up for recurring characters and then never mentioning them again, so that's annoying. There are 6 seasons. There are some great romances in the show, and also some iffy ones, but the iffy ones are definitely regarded as such in the show, and eventually either develop past the weird stage or die before anymore harm can be done. Aired from 2011 to 2017

Thoughts on the fandom: Wayyyy too small, I know of 0 people around my age who like it, and 90% of the fan base is obsessed with Sasha Roiz who plays Sean Renard (not that I'm judging). Definitely not enough fics out there, and the ones that I've found seem to be poorly written or basically just pwp.

Warehouse 13

Platform: Amazon Prime

Official overview: Following an abrupt transfer, Secret Service agents Pete Lattimer and Myka Bering find themselves in the middle of South Dakota at a massive, top-secret storage warehouse that holds every strange artifact, mysterious relic, out-of-this-world object and supernatural souvenir ever found by the U.S. government. Lattimer and Bering's new task, as directed by the warehouse's caretaker, longtime agent Artie Nielsen, is to investigate reports of unexplainable and paranormal activity in an effort to secure more peculiar and dangerous objects, and to help Artie manage the warehouse itself.

My overview: imagine the TARDIS except it's a warehouse and not a police box (bigger on the inside) and it's full of cursed objects to be kept there so it doesn't destroy the world.

Thoughts on the show: I love it. It accurately depicts trauma and has decent representation such as a black woman everyone is intimidated by because she's the boss, a gay man who isn't sexualized and has development and a personality other than "gay". There is even an incredibly homoerotic friendship between two women that the actress of said women played up because they wanted their characters together, even if one turned out to be not-so-good. The show deals with sexism and victims of neglect. You'll learn a lot of random history while watching the show as all of the artifacts tend to be historically based (the guillotine blade that cut of Marie Antoinette's head, for instance). There are 5 seasons and I'm s3 or 4. Apparently the show does something weird with Pete and Myka at the end, which probably means they get together. Ran 2009 to 2014.

Thoughts on the fandom: again, way too small, although a lot bigger than Grimm. There are quite a few fics out there, mainly for the two women which I ship with my whole heart. There might be some controversy with Eddie McClintock (Pete Lattimer) but I'm not very well-versed in it. I wish Grimm's fandom was as big as W13's.

The Umbrella Academy

Platform: Netflix

Official overview: On one day in 1989, 43 infants are inexplicably born to random, unconnected women who showed no signs of pregnancy the day before. Seven are adopted by billionaire industrialist Sir Reginald Hargreeves, who creates the Umbrella Academy and prepares his "children" to save the world. In their teenage years, though, the family fractures and the team disbands. Fast forward to the present time, when the six surviving members of the clan reunite upon the news of Hargreeves' passing. They work together to solve a mystery surrounding their father's death, but divergent personalities and abilities again pull the estranged family apart, and a global apocalypse is another imminent threat. The series is based on a collection of comics and graphic novels created and written by My Chemical Romance lead singer Gerard Way.

My overview: adult survivors of abuse with increasingly weird/out-there superpowers due to the weird circumstances of their birth come together to celebrate *cough* I mean mourn the passing of their "father" And accidentally cause the apocalypse.

Thoughts on the show: I love it. I've finished season 2,currenfly there are only 2 seasons, it's still in progress, I love it. I'm sure most of you have already watched it because what is the supernatural fandom if not emo? Also a good one for representation. Mexican man with a stutter, black woman with a daughter she is in a custody battle for, gay druggie veteran, Ellen Page, Asian ghost boy, 58 year old man in a 13 year old's body, and a half-chimp man.

Thoughts on the fandom: big. Big big big. Haven't found any fics that cater to my specific wants in a fic, but there are fics. Some of them have weird pairings, but since the show made two (adopted) siblings canon, I can't exactly blame them.

Lost Girl

Platform: I actually have no idea

Official overview: Bo is a small-town girl on the run after a disastrous sexual encounter with her boyfriend ends with his death. Bo learns that she is not human, but a succubus, who feeds on the sexual energy of humans. She and her kind are members of the Fae, creatures of legend, who walk among humans and feed off them in different ways. As she searches for the truth about her origins and runs from her inhuman urges, she vows to help those she meets along the way -- human or Fae -- who need to right a wrong.

My overview: bisexual woman finds out she's a succubus and she has to choose to be either good Fae or bad Fae (I think it's light vs dark but it's been a Hot Minute) she has a thing with a werewolf and also a thing with a Fae doctor who is human and a woman.

Thoughts on the show: it's good, 5 seasons, don't think I've finished the first season. Back when I started watching it it was on Netflix and has since been removed. It's on Vudo but it costs money which is bullshit. It's a little weird at first, but I like it. Ran 2010 to 2015.

Thoughts on the fandom: have not interacted with the fandom for fear of spoilers. I'd imagine this show's fandom is about the size of Grimm.

Being Human (USA version)

Platform: again, I don't know.

Official overview: "Being Human," based on a BBC series of the same name, features three 20-something roommates who each try to keep a secret from the rest of the world -- one is a ghost, another is a vampire and the third is a werewolf. The three roomies try to help one another navigate the complexities of living double lives.

My overview: again, weird starts off in almost the middle of the story. It deals with abuse, death, fighting urges, dealing with past sins, and, well, being human. The characters are Sally (Ghost) Aidan (vampire) and Josh (werewolf). The three of them are trying to live like normal, Aidan and Josh as workers at the local hospital as Sally works to deal with her death.

Thoughts on the show: I love it I just wish I could find it on a reliable site, again, it's on Vudo but it costs money. It definitely had the set up for a good mlm relationship but from what I've gathered they end up forcing heterosexuality.

Thoughts on the fandom: again, too small, roughly the size of Grimm. I have seen 0 fics.

The Librarians

Platform: Hulu I do so believe

Official overview: Cued by TNT's popular 'The Librarian' trilogy, this series introduces new members of an ancient group protecting mystical artefacts. Hidden below the Metropolitan Public Library, the secret society's longtime leader is Flynn Carsen, whose job has become very complicated. To help, the Library recruits Eve, a counterterrorism agent responsible for organizational security; Jacob, who has encyclopedic knowledge of art, architecture and history; Cassandra, who links auditory/sensory hallucinations to memory; and Ezekiel, a skilled thief and master technician. Overseeing them is Jenkins, the reclusive caretaker of the Library's sleepy little outpost in Oregon. Noah Wyle executive produces and recurs as Flynn, the role he played in the movie series.

My overview: very similar to W13. This time imagine the Bunker, and the Warehouse, and boom, you've got the Library.

Thoughts on the show: good! I love it, I just found out it was on Hulu and am going to be binging it as soon as I finish Grimm and Warehouse. I'd love to see a crossover between W13 and The Librarians I feel like they'd have a feud.

Thoughts on the fandom: probably the same size as W13 if not bigger as the series came from movies. Again, haven't finished the series so I haven't interacted with the fandom.

Eureka

Platform: Amazon Prime

Official overview: In the years since World War II, the U.S. government has been relocating the world's geniuses (and their families) to the Pacific Northwest town of Eureka. Daily life there shifts between amazing innovation and total chaos. U.S. Marshal Jack Carter learns this first-hand when his car breaks down in Eureka, stranding him among the town's eccentric citizens. When they unleash a scientific creation still unknown to the outside world, it's up to Carter to restore order. Subsequently, he's let in on one of America's best-kept secrets.

My overview: a small town but make every person a genius. Has some crossover with Warehouse 13, they exist in the same universe.

Thoughts on the show: I love it so far. Just the kind of weird shit I enjoy.

Thoughts on the fandom: I'd imagine about the size of Warehouse 13's but I've yet to interact considering I'm still in season 1.

[things2mustdo]

In order for a nation to survive, two critical emotions must be controlled. Contrary to popular belief, these emotions are not fear and greed—although these are very important to control, as well. Rather, it’s masculine aggression and feminine vanity that must be controlled…and we are doing a terrible job at this.

Unfortunately, over the past 70 years, we’ve seen sex roles and gender dynamics completely turned on their heads. Rather than men and women working together to create better relationships, more functional families, and more powerful countries, we’ve been pit against one another by toxic ideologies and ruthless demagogues.

It is not enough to simply know what is happening, however—we must know precisely how it’s happening, step by step, and more importantly, WHY it’s happening. In this article, I will explore why our society has gone so downhill so fast, and potential solutions we can integrate to remedy it (if we can save it, at all).

The Two Forces

As I said previously, there are two very delicate forces which must constantly be counter-balancing one another, and anytime they grow unbalanced, there will be chaos. These two forces are, of course, masculine aggression and feminine vanity. Too much masculine aggression, and a country becomes war-torn, unable to run itself or stay stable long enough to produce any sort of civilization (think the Middle East).

Too much feminine vanity, however, and the opposite occurs. Men become reclusive, because women become far too difficult to deal with. This is why we’ve seen the rise of the sigma male over the past 20 years—men who refuse to attach themselves to any sort of social hierarchy. They’re not alpha, beta, or omega. They just do as they do, without adhering to any sort of social group or workplace hierarchy.

As feminine vanity grows excessive, female hypergamy is given reign to run loose. Rather than men and women developing healthy relationships with one another, women become so conceited that they refuse to “settle” for anyone less than an alpha male Chad Thundercock, and thus we have a surplus of angry, bitter women who hit the wall at 30 and end up childless and alone.

It’s so obvious that it should go without saying, that we are currently in a serious imbalance. For far too long, masculine aggression has been hampered and stomped down by our effeminate school system, our brainwashing devices (aka TV’s), and our mass media control system. All the while, these things have encouraged women to do as they please, without any consequences or thought of their actions on a larger, societal scale.

Restoring the Balance

Balance will be restored, one way or another. There are only two ways for this imbalance to possibly be restored, and most men here will acknowledge, at least implicitly, that this is the case:

Men in OTHER COUNTRIES restore the balance (by coming here en masse)

Men in THIS COUNTRY restore the balance (by not being pussies)

Those are the only two options. There is no third option, where women somehow magically stop giving men 500,000 shit tests a day and step down to become good, faithful girlfriends, wives, and mothers. This will not happen. When a society reaches this critical imbalance, only one of two things can happen.

Of course, we all know what the elites (oy vey!) are pushing for. They want to bring millions of aggressive, young, fighting-age men to this country, to supposedly help combat “population decline.” We all know that this is complete horse shit, and that their true motive is to destroy America.

Even so, with the full force of the elites raining down upon us, there is hope. Over the past two years, we’ve seen more masculine energy emerge and come to the front of our socio-political battlegrounds than arguably any other time in history. For the first time in the past 70 years, men are reclaiming their manhood.

Let me reiterate that this is the only option. There is no magical world where everything just works out great, where we have millions of violent, aggressive 20-something-year-old men come into this country, and we retain our values as an Anglo-Saxon country. No. This will not happen. We either get our acts together, collectively, as men, or we watch our nation burn.

The Path Forward (2018-2020)

The next two years are of critical importance. We have collectively, successfully memed the most brutally alpha and pro-American president into office arguably since Ronald Reagan. This is not an opportunity that we can afford to squander—we must all begin proactively restoring the balance of masculinity in this country, from the top down, otherwise our nation will perish to globalists and their dumb, but useful allies.

There will be resistance, as there is whenever masculinity tries to assert itself. Pay no attention to this resistance. Simply follow the advice which the manosphere advocates for:

Create an income independent of a massive, bureaucratic, globalist corporation

Increase your testosterone levels (start by avoiding foods that kill testosterone)

Lift weights, and become physically able to stand up for yourself

Proactively participate in the upcoming midterms, and the Presidential Election of 2020

Do everything you can to red pill those who are ready (emphasis on them being ready)

If we, collectively, as a group of thousands of like-minded men all across the nation can successfully pull this off, we will see a resurgence of economic, political, and social growth which will have been unprecedented.

If we do not pull it off however, and our nation succumbs to the manipulations of the elite, a far more grim and sinister future will play out.

The Alternative

If we do not successfully reclaim the balance of masculine aggression and feminine vanity in this country, all will be lost, and we will be forced to either live through hell, or leave our homelands. Here’s what to expect over the next decade or so, if a social justice warrior is elected President in 2020, and we lose the culture wars:

Increasing surveillance over the internet

More thought crime policies instituted into law

The figurative castration of men all across the country

Eventual race wars, or religious wars, spurred on primarily by Islamic migrants

This is non-negotiable. If we lose the culture wars to SJW’s over the next several years, we will begin to see lobbying to shut down any and all manosphere websites dedicated to spreading the truth. We have already seen PayPal, YouTube, Amazon, Facebook, Twitter, and Google begin to censor people like Roosh, Alex Jones, Donald Trump, and other conservative/red pilled speakers. We cannot afford to stand this any longer.

If we lose these mediums to the globalists, they will easily gain the support of the public to institute thought crime policies into our legal system. You have a book by Bronze Age Pervert, that Amazon can track from your order history? NAZI SCUM! You’re going to prison. It doesn’t matter that you didn’t actually hurt anyone in any way shape or form, because you had an opinion that the globalists dislike.

As this begins to happen, men will self-imprison all over the nation. Some will fight, of course, and maybe win (if we’re lucky). Others will leave and attempt to gain citizenship in more male-friendly countries such as Denmark, Austria, and Poland. The rest will be forced to hang their heads in perpetual shame.

Eventually, as the population of third world migrants explodes, and tribalism is exacerbated by the polarizing media, we will begin to see rampant terrorist attacks, which are already happening in Germany, The UK, and other nations around the cucked European Union. Inevitably, this will end in a civil war.

It’s Our Choice

I have presented to you the only two choices that we have, and to me, the decision is quite simple. We can either sit around passively, and squabble amongst ourselves over stupid theories and philosophies, or we can take action to better ourselves and improve the stance of our nation.

The choice is clear to me. We either succumb to globalist propaganda, see the death of masculinity in the West, and see freedom of speech die as it is destined to do, or we fight back and create a better future. Some may say this is melodramatic. I would say that a mere cursory glance at history will prove otherwise.

Read Next: Cultural Collapse Theory: The 7 Steps That Lead To A Complete Culture Decline

It was Joe’s first date with Mary. He asked her what she wanted in life and she replied, “I want to establish my career. That’s the most important thing to me right now.” Undeterred that she had no need for a man in her life, Joe entertained her with enough funny stories and cocky statements that she soon allowed him to lightly pet her forearm.

At the end of the date, he locked arms with her on the walk to the subway station, when two Middle Eastern men on scooter patrol accosted them and said they were forbidden to touch. “This is Sharia zone,” they said in heavily accented English, in front of a Halal butcher shop. Joe and Mary felt bad that they offended the two men, because they were trained in school to respect all religions but that of their ancestors. One of the first things they learned was that their white skin gave them extra privilege in life which must be consciously restrained at all times. Even if they happened to disagree with the two men, they could not verbally object because of anti-hate laws that would put them in jail for religious discrimination. They unlocked arms and maintained a distance of three feet from each other.

Unfortunately for Joe, Mary did not want to go out with him again, but seven years later he did receive a message from her on Facebook saying hello. She became vice president of a company, but could not find a man equal to her station since women now made 25% more than men on average. Joe had long left the country and moved to Thailand, where he married a young Thai girl and had three children. He had no plans on returning to his country, America.

If cultural collapse occurs in the way I will now describe, the above scenario will be the rule within a few decades. The Western world is being colonized in reverse, not by weapons or hard power, but through a combination of progressivism and low reproductive rates. These two factors will lead to a complete cultural collapse of many Western nations within the next 200 years. This theory will show the most likely mechanism that it will proceed in America, Canada, UK, Scandinavia, and Western Europe.

What Is A Cultural Collapse?

Cultural collapse is the decline, decay, or disappearance of a native population’s rituals, habits, interpersonal communication, relationships, art, and language. It coincides with a relative decline of population compared to outside groups. National identity and group identification will be lost while revisionist history will be applied to demonize or find fault with the native population. Cultural collapse is not to be confused with economic or state collapse. A nation that suffers from a cultural collapse can still be economically productive and have a working government.

First I will share a brief summary of the cultural collapse progression before explaining them in more detail. Then I will discuss where I see many countries along its path.

The Cultural Collapse Progression

1. Removal of religious narrative from people’s lives, replaced by a treadmill of scientific and technological “progress.”

2. Elimination of traditional sex roles through feminism, gender equality, political correctness, cultural Marxism, and socialism.

3. Delay or abstainment of family formation by women to pursue careerist lifestyles while men wait in confused limbo.

4. Decreasing birth rate among native population.

5. Government enactment of open immigration policies to prevent economic collapse.

6. Immigrant refusal to fully acclimate, forcing host culture to adopt external rituals and beliefs while being out-reproduced.

7. Natives becoming marginalized in their own country.

1. Removal of religious narrative

Religion has been a powerful restraint for millennia in preventing humans from pursuing their base desires and narcissistic tendencies so that they satisfy a god. Family formation is the central unit of most religions, possibly because children increase membership at zero marginal cost to the church (i.e. they don’t need to be recruited).

Religion may promote scientific ignorance, but it facilitates reproduction by giving people a narrative that places family near the center of their existence.[1] [2] [3] After the Enlightenment, the rapid advance of science and its logical but nihilistic explanations into the universe have removed the religious narrative and replaced it with an empty narrative of scientific progress, knowledge, and technology, which act as a restraint and hindrance to family formation, allowing people to pursue individual goals of wealth accumulation or hedonistic pleasure seeking.[4] As of now, there has not been a single non-religious population that has been able to reproduce above the death rate.[5]

Even though many people today claim to believe in god, they may not step inside a church but once or twice a year for special holidays. Religion went from being a lifestyle, a manual for living, to something that is thought about in passing.

2. Elimination of traditional sex roles

Once religion no longer plays a role in people’s lives, the stage is set to fracture male-female bonding. It is collectively attacked by several ideologies stemming from the beliefs of Cultural Marxist theory, which serve to accomplish one common end: destruction of the family unit so that citizens are dependent on the state. They achieve this goal through the marginalization of men and their role in society under the banner of “equality.”[6] With feminism pushed to the forefront of this umbrella movement, the drive for equality ends up being a power grab by women.[7] This attack is performed on a range of fronts:

medicating boys from a young age with ADHD drugs to eradicate displays of masculinity[8]

shaming of men for having direct sexual interest in attractive and fertile women

criminalization of normal male behavior by redefining some instances of consensual sex as rape[9]

imprisonment of unemployed fathers for non-payment of child support, rendering them destitute and unable to be a part of their children’s lives[10]

taxation of men at higher rates for redistribution to women[11] [12]

promotion of single mother and homosexual lifestyles over that of the nuclear family[13] [14]

The end result is that men, confused about their identify and averse to state punishment from sexual harassment, “date rape,” and divorce proceedings, make a rational decision to wait on the sidelines.[15] Women, still not happy with the increased power given to them, continue their assault on men by instructing them to “man up” into what has become an unfair deal—marriage. The elevation of women above men is allowed by corporations, which adopt “girl power” marketing to expand their consumer base and increase profits.[16] [17] Governments also allow it because it increases their tax revenue. Because there is money to be made with women working and becoming consumers, there is no effort by the elite to halt this development.

3. Women begin to place career above family

At the same time men are emasculated as mere “sperm donors,” women are encouraged to adopt the career goals, mannerisms, and competitive lifestyles of men, inevitably causing them to delay marriage, often into an age where they can no longer find suitable husbands who have more resources than themselves. [18] [19] [20] [21] The average woman will find it exceedingly difficult to balance career and family, and since she has no concern of getting “fired” from her family, who she may see as a hindrance to her career goals, she will devote an increasing proportion of time into her job.

Female income, in aggregate, will soon match or exceed that of men.[22] [23] [24] A key reason that women historically got married was to be economically provided for, but this reason will no longer persist and women will feel less pressure or motivation to marry. The burgeoning spinster population will simply be a money-making opportunity for corporations to market to an increasing population of lonely women. Cat and small dog sales will rise.

Women succumb to their primal sexual and materialistic urges to live the “Sex and the City” lifestyle full of fine dining, casual sex, technological bliss, and general gluttony without learning traditional household skills or feminine qualities that would make them attractive wives.[25] [26] Men adapt to careerist women in a rational way by doing the following:

to sate their natural sexual desires, men allow their income to lower since economic stability no longer provides a draw to women in their prime[27]

they mimic “alpha male” social behavior to get laid with women who, without having an urgent need for a man’s monetary resources to survive, can choose men based on confidence, aesthetics, and general entertainment value[28]

they withdraw into a world of video games and the internet, satisfying their own base desires for play and simulated hunting[29] [30]

Careerist women who decide to marry will do so in a hurried rush around 30 because they fear growing old alone, but since they are well past their fertility peak[31], they may find it difficult to reproduce. In the event of successful reproduction at such a later age, fewer children can be born before biological infertility, limiting family size compared to the historical past.

4. Birth rates decrease among native population

The stage is now set for the death rate to outstrip the birth rate. This creates a demographic cliff where there is a growing population of non-working elderly relative to able-bodied younger workers. Two problems result:

Not enough tax revenue is supplied by the working population in order to provide for the elderly’s medical and social retirement needs.[32] Borrowing can only temporarily maintain these entitlements.

Decrease of economic activity since more people are dying than buying.[33]

No modern nation has figured out how to substantially raise birth rates among native populations. The most successful effort has been done in France, but that has still kept the birth rate among French-born women just under the replacement rate (2.08 vs 2.1).[34] The easiest and fastest way to solve this double-edged problem is to promote mass immigration of non-elderly individuals who will work, spend, and procreate at rates greater than natives.[35]

A replenishing supply of births are necessary to create taxpayers, workers, entrepreneurs, and consumers in order to maintain the nation’s economic development.[36] While many claim that the planet is suffering from “overpopulation,” an economic collapse is inevitable for those countries who do not increase their population at steady rates.

5. Large influx of immigration

An aging population without youthful refilling will cause a scarcity of labor, increasing that labor’s price. Corporate elites will now lobby governments for immigration reform to relieve this upward pressure on wages.[37] [38] At the same time, the modern mantra of sustained GDP growth puts pressure on politicians for dissemination of favorable economic growth data to aid in their re-elections. The simplest way to increase GDP without innovation or development of industry is to expand the population. Both corporate and political elites now have their goals in alignment where the easiest solution becomes immigration.[39] [40]

While politicians hem and haw about designing permanent immigration policies, immigrants continue to settle within the nation.[41] The national birth rate problem is essentially solved overnight, as it’s much easier to drain third-world nations of its starry-eyed population with enticements of living in the first-world than it is to encourage the native women to reproduce. (Lateral immigration from one first-world nation to another is so relatively insignificant that the niche term ‘expatriation’ has been developed to describe it). Native women will show a stubborn resistance at any suggestion they should create families, much preferring a relatively responsibility-free lifestyle of sexual variety, casual internet dating via mobile apps, consumer excess, and comfortable high-paying jobs in air conditioned offices.[42] [43]

Immigrants will almost always come from societies that are more religious and, in the case of Islam with regard to European immigration, far more scientifically primitive and rigid in its customs.[44]

6. Sanitization of host culture coincides with increase in immigrant power

While many adult immigrants will feel gracious at the opportunity to live in a more prosperous nation, others will soon feel resentment that they are forced to work menial jobs in a country that is far more expensive than their own.[45] [46] [47] [48] [49] The majority of them remain in lower economic classes, living in poor “immigrant communities” where they can speak their own language, find their own homeland foods, and follow their own customs or religion.

Instead of breaking out of their foreigner communities, immigrants seek to expand it by organizing. They form local groups and civic organizations to teach natives better ways to understand and serve immigrant populations. They will be eager to publicize cases where immigrants have been insulted by insensitive natives or treated unfairly by police authorities in the case of petty crime.[50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] School curriculums may be changed to promote diversity or multiculturalism, at great expense to the native culture.[56] Concessions will be made not to offend immigrants.[57] A continual stream of outrages will be found and this will feed the power of the organizations and create a state within a state where native elites become fearful of applying laws to immigrants.[58]

7. Destruction of native culture

This step has not yet happened in any first-world nation, so I will predict it based on logically extending known events I have already described.

Local elites will give lip service to immigrant groups for votes but will be slow to give them real state or economic power. Citizenship rules may even be tightened to prevent immigrants from being elected. The elites will be mostly insulated from the cultural crises in their isolated communities, private schools, and social clubs, where they can continue to incubate their own sub-culture without outside influence. At the same time, they will make speeches and enact polices to force native citizens to accept multiculturalism and blind immigration. Anti-hate and anti-discrimination laws will be more vigorously enforced than other more serious crimes. Police will monitor social networking to identify those who make statements against protected classes.

Cultural decline begins in earnest when the natives feel shame or guilt for who they are, their history, their way of life, and where their ancestors came from. They will let immigrant groups criticize their customs without protest, or they simply embrace immigrant customs instead with religious conversion and interethnic marriages. Nationalistic pride will be condemned as a “far-right” phenomenon and popular nationalistic politicians will be compared to Hitler. Natives learn the art of self-censorship, limiting the range of their speech and expressions, and soon only the elderly can speak the truths of the cultural decline while a younger multiculturalist within earshot attributes such frankness to senility or racist nostalgia.

With the already entrenched environment of political correctness (see stage 2), the local culture becomes a sort of “world” culture that can be declared tolerant and progressive as long as there is a lack of criticism against immigrants, multiculturalism, and their combined influence. All cultural identity will eventually be lost, and to be “American” or “British,” for example, will no longer have modern meaning from a sociological perspective. Native traditions will be eradicated and a cultural mixing will take place where citizens from one world nation will be nearly identical in behavior, thought, and consumer tastes to citizens of another. Once a collapse occurs, it cannot be reversed. The nation’s cultural heritage will be forever lost.

I want to now take a brief look at six different countries and see where they are along the cultural collapse progression…

Russia

This is an interesting case because, up to recently, we saw very low birth rates not due to progressive ideals but from a rough transition to capitalism in the 1990’s and a high male mortality from alcoholism.[59] [60] To help sustain its population, Russia is readily accepting immigrants from Central Asian regions, treating them like second-class citizens and refusing to make any accommodations away from the ethnic Russian way of life. Even police authorities turn a blind eye when local skinhead groups attack immigrants.[61] In addition, Russia has also shown no tolerance to homosexual or progressive groups,[62] stunting their negative effects upon the culture. The birth rate has risen in recent years to levels seen in Western Europe but it’s still not above the death rate. Russia will see a population collapse before a cultural one.

Likelihood of 50-year cultural collapse: Very low

Brazil

We’re seeing rapid movement through stages 2 and 3, where progressive ideology based on the American model is becoming adopted and a large poor population ensure progressive politicians will continue to remain in power with promises of economic redistribution.[63] [64] [65] Within 15 years we should see a sharp drop in birth rates and a relaxation of immigration laws.

Likelihood of 50-year cultural collapse: Moderate

America

Some could argue that America is currently experiencing a cultural collapse. It always had a fragile culture because of its immigrant foundings, but immigrants of the past (including my own parents) rapidly acclimated into the host culture to create a sense of national pride around an ethic of hard work and shared democratic values. This is being eroded as a fem-centric culture rises in its place, with its focus on trends, celebrities, homosexuality, multiculturalism, and male-bashing. Natives have become pleasure seekers with little inclination to reproduction during their years of peak fertility.[66]

Likelihood of 50-year cultural collapse: Very high

England

While America always had high amounts of immigration, and therefore a system of integration, England is newer to the game. In the past 20 years, they have massively ramped up their immigration efforts.[67] A visit to London will confirm that the native British are slowly becoming minorities, with their iconic red telephone booths left undisturbed purely for tourist photo opportunities. Approximately 5% of the English population is now Muslim.[68] Instead of acclimatizing, they are achieving early success in creating zones with Sharia law.[69] The English elite, in response, is jailing natives under stringent anti-race laws.[70] England had a highly successful immigration story with Polish immigrants who eagerly acclimated to English culture, but have opened the doors to other peoples who don’t want to integrate.[71]

Likelihood of 50-year cultural collapse: Very high

Sweden

Sweden is experiencing a similar immigration situation to England, but they possess a higher amount of self-shame and white guilt. Instead of allowing immigrants who could work in the Swedish economy, they are encouraging migration of asylum seekers who have been made destitute by war. These immigrants enter Sweden and immediately receive social benefits. In effect, Sweden is welcoming the least economically productive people in the world.[72] The immigrants will produce little or no economic benefit, and may even worsen Sweden’s economy. Immigrants are turning some parts of Sweden, such as the Rosengard area of Malmo, into a ghetto.[73]

Likelihood of 50-year cultural collapse: Very high

Poland

From my one and half years of living in Poland, I have seen a moderate level of progressive ideological creep, careerism among women, hedonism, and idolation of Western values, particularly out of England, where a large percentage of the Polish population have emigrated for work. Younger Poles may not act much different from their Western counterparts in their party lifestyle behavior, but there nonetheless remains a tenuous maintenance of traditional sex roles. Women of fertile age are pursuing relationships over one-night stands, but careerism is causing them to stall family formation. This puts a downward pressure on birth rates, which stems from significant numbers of fertile young women emigrating to countries like the UK and USA, along with continued economic uncertainties faced from transitioning to capitalism[74]. As Europe’s “least multicultural” nation, Poland has long been hesitant to accept immigrants, but this has recently changed and they are encouraging migrants.[75]  To its credit, it is seeking first-world entrepreneurs instead of low skilled laborers or asylum seekers. Its cultural fate will be an interesting development in the years to come, but the prognosis will be more negative as long as its young people are eager to leave the homeland.

Likelihood of 50-year cultural collapse: Possible

Poland and Russia show the limitations of Cultural Collapse Theory in that it best applies to first-world nations with highly developed economies. They have low birth rates but not through the mechanism I described, though if they adopt a more Western ideological track like Brazil, I expect to see the same outcome that is befalling England or Sweden.

There can be many paths to cultural destruction, and those nations with the most similarities will gravitate towards the same path, just like how Eastern European nations are suffering low birth rates because of mass emigration due to being introduced into the European Union.

How To Stop Cultural Collapse

Maintaining native birth rates while preventing the elite from allowing immigrant labor is the most effective means at preventing cultural collapse. Since multiculturalism is an experiment with no proven efficacy, a culture can only be maintained by a relatively homogenous group who identify with each other. When that homogeneity breaks down and one citizen looks to the next and does not see a person with the same values as himself, the culture falls in dis-repair as native citizens begin to lose a shared means of communication and identity. Once the percentage of the immigrant population crosses a certain threshold (perhaps 15%), the decline will pick up in pace and cultural breakdown will be readily apparent to all observers.

Current policies to solve low birth rates through immigration is a short-term fix with dire long-term consequences. In effect, it’s a Trojan-horse prescription of irreversible cultural destruction. A state must prevent itself from entering the position where mass immigration is considered a solution by blocking progressive ideologies from taking hold. One way this can be done is through the promotion of a state-sponsored religion which encourages the nuclear family instead of single motherhood and homosexuality. However, introducing religion as a mainstay of citizen life in the post-enlightenment era may be impossible.

We must consider that the scientific era is an evolutionary maladaptive feature of humanity that natural selection will accordingly punish (i.e. those who are anti-religious and pro-science will simply breed less). It must also be considered that with religion in permanent decline, cultural collapse may be a certainty that eventually occurs in all developed nations. Religion, it may turn out, was evolutionary beneficial to the human race.

Another possible solution is to foster a patriarchal society where men serve as strong providers. If you encourage the development of successful men who possess indispensable skills and therefore resources that are lacked by females, there will be women below their station who want to marry and procreate with them, but if strong women are produced instead, marriage and procreation is unlikely to take place at levels above the death rate.

A gap between the sexes should always exist in the favor of men if procreation is to occur at high rates, or else you’ll have something similar to the situation in America where urban professional women cannot find “good men” to begin a family with (i.e., men who are significantly more financially successful than them). They instead remain single and barren, only used occasionally by cads for exciting casual sex.

One issue that I purposefully ignored is the effect of technology and consumerism on lowering birth rates. How much influence does video games, internet, and smartphones contribute to a birth decline? How much of an effect does Western-style consumerism have in delaying marriage? I suspect they have more of an amplification effect than being an outright cause. If a country is proceeding through the cultural collapse model, technology will simply hurry the collapse, but giving internet access to a traditionally religious group of people may not cause them to flip overnight. Research will have to be done in these areas to say for sure.

Conclusion

The first iteration of any theory is sure to create as many questions as answers, but I hope that by proposing this model, it becomes more clear why some cultures seem so quick to degrade while others display a sort of immunity. Some countries may be too far down the wrong path to be saved, but I hope the information presented gives concerned readers ideas on protecting their own culture by allowing them to connect how progressive ideologies that may seem innocent or benign on the surface can eventually lead to an outright collapse of their nation’s culture.

[laconservancy]

Our Favorite Movies, Starring Los Angeles!

This list was compiled by the L.A. Conservancy’s Last Remaining Seats Committee—the volunteers who select the LRS lineup each year, and help produce the film series. Rest assured, they know their movies—as well as their classic L.A. architecture! If you’re pining to visit the places that make our city special, consider watching one of these classic L.A. stories—and enjoy seeing them on the small screen, instead.

Clueless (1995)

Streaming: N/A

“This was such a great coming of age movie that it took me years to realize it was an adaptation of Jane Austen’s “Emma.”  One of my favorite scenes is when Cher is being robbed at the Circus Liquor store, on a bad day I like to drive to that location and quote “You don’t understand. This is an Alaia… It’s like a totally important designer.” -Helen 

Double Indemnity (1944) 

Streaming: Hulu 

Los Angeles locations plus a great Film Noir story.  You can’t go wrong with a movie that has lines like “How could I have known that murder can sometimes smell like honeysuckle.” -Scott 

La La Land (2016) 

Streaming: YouTube

Not a historic movie, but is there any film that better captures the beauty of living in the city of angels? A musical with songs that will keep you cheery while sitting in traffic, La La Land is peak modern Los Angeles. -Sam 

Bosch (2014 - Present)

Streaming: Netflix

Michael Connelly's LAPD homicide detective, Harry Bosch, travels all over L.A. There is enough detail (in the books) to follow his travels. He lives on Woodrow Wilson just off Mulholland. He eats at Chinese Kitchen, Nickel Diner, Musso and Franks, Pacific Dining Car, etc. -Paul 

“M” (1951) 

Streaming: N/A, but on DVD on Amazon 

Great shots of 1951 Bunker Hill before it was redeveloped, plus, this is a great atmospheric Film Noir. -Celeste 

Devil In A Blue Dress (1995)

 Streaming: Amazon Prime Video, and also on STARZ 

Noir Los Angeles in the 1950s, but from an African American perspective. 

-Celeste 

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (2019)

Streaming: Amazon Prime 

I know it isn’t an older film though it completely changed the meaning of “once upon a time” for us… -Caroline 

Kiss Me Deadly (1955)

Steaming: N/A 

“Kiss Me Deadly” is one of my top ten movies.  It also features some scenes with great footage of Bunker Hill and Angel’s Flight going up and down.  Later, the world seems to come to end, but not without a lot of tough guys talking wise first and dames manipulating them behind their backs. -Tom Dailey 

Inherent Vice (2014) 

Streaming: Amazon Prime

One of my favorite recent discoveries!  It stars Joaquin Phoenix, Josh Brolin, and a pre-Fantastic Beasts Katherine Waterston. It features so many great L.A. locations. Director Paul Thomas Anderson loves LA and it comes through on film. -Traci 

The  Exiles (1961)

Streaming: N/A 

Depicts transplanted American Indians from SW reservations, living in the Bunker Hill area of Los Angeles during the late 1950's. Directed by Kent MacKenzie, a USC film student, it was lost for 50 years and rediscovered by Director Thom Anderson in his movie "Los Angeles Plays Itself". It is important to me because of my Native American roots. -Elizabeth Night 

Nightcrawler (2014)

Streaming: Amazon, Google Play, ITunes, VUDU 

Lou Bloom (Jake Gyllenhaal), a driven young man desperate for work, discovers the high-speed world of L.A. crime journalism. Finding a group of freelance camera crews who film crashes, fires, murder and other mayhem.  -Tracy Jackson

The Neon Demon (2016) 

Streaming: Google Play, YouTube 

Jesse (Elle Fanning) moves to Los Angeles just after her 16th birthday to launch a career as a model. The head of her agency tells the innocent teen that she has the qualities to become a top star. Jesse soon faces the wrath of ruthless vixens who despise her fresh-faced beauty. On top of that, she must contend with a seedy motel manager and a creepy photographer. As Jesse starts to take the fashion world by storm, her personality changes in ways that could help her against her cutthroat rivals. I love this film because it’s very weird but beautifully shot. It’s a slow-building thriller that shows LA in a creepy, neon light! -Megan Bennett 

The Big Sleep (1946) 

Streaming: Available to rent on Amazon Prime, Google Play, YouTube

P.I. Philip Marlowe (Humphrey Bogart) is hired by a wealthy general to discover who is blackmailing his daughter over gambling debts and stop them. Marlowe finds himself deep within a web of love triangles, blackmail, murder, gambling, and organized crime, not to mention falling in love with the general’s other daughter, Vivian (Lauren Bacall). Marlowe goes all over L.A. looking for clues, including the Hollywood Public Library and up into the Hollywood Hills. Author Raymond Chandler was rumored to have based the General’s home on the Greystone Mansion. This film is one of my favorites because it has the best dialogue I’ve ever heard in a film. The one-liners and quick exchanges are awesome, and every scene with Bogie and Bacall is exquisite. - Liz Highstrete 

Chinatown (1974) 

Streaming: Amazon Prime, Hulu, iTunes, Google Play

I know this title is radioactive due to its connection with Polanski.  But, as the recent book by Sam Wesson, The Big Goodbye, points out, Chinatown was a significant collaboration of many creative forces, including Robert Towne, Jack Nicholson, Robert Evans, Faye Dunaway, John Huston, Diane Ladd, John Alonzo, Richard Sybert, and others.  Their work can still be admired.  Plus, there are scenes shot on location throughout L.A. city and county. https://la.curbed.com/maps/chinatown-filming-location-map -Tom

L. A. Confidential (1997)

Streaming:  Netflix 

L.A. Confidential is a 1950’s Hollywood crime drama of corrupt cops and mobster bad-guys filmed at historic locations across Los Angeles.  In particular, the movie showcases Richard Neutra’s “Lovell Health House” on Dundee Road in Los Feliz as the supposed home of the local pimp, who runs a prostitution ring of women who have taken on the appearances of famous movie stars.  Kim Basinger stars as Veronica Lake look-alike.  Russell Crowe, Kevin Spacey and Guy Pearce star as three very different cops.  Danny DeVito writes the local tabloid news. Originally built and named for a health-and-fitness guru, the Lovell Health House has just been put on the market, according to Curbed Los Angeles, and the current owner “wants to find a buyer who will appreciate the home’s architecture—and either preserve it or restore it”.  Any takers? -Leslie

[scifimagpie]

How We Lie to Ourselves and Make it Pretty

Today, something’s on my mind: the destructive power of narrative and stories.

TV shows, podcasts and books — more so TVs than the other mediums, funnily enough — do so love to talk about the importance and power of narrative. I remember episodes of Doctor Who and Supernatural that touched on this theme, and more recently, Game of Thrones used narrative and “having the best story” as an excuse to make a particular character rise to the throne of Westeros. (It’s also worth mentioning that, in the same finale, talking about “the power of stories” is used to get a character out of execution.)

In the context of storytellers talking about the importance of stories — myself included — there’s always something self-congratulatory and auto-fellating that bothers me about it, even when it’s handled elegantly or beautifully. There’s no getting around the fact that such situations represent creators literally telling their audience how important both their creations and the creators are. It reminds me of the tricks of confidence artists, bringing their mark or dupe into the confiding folds of conspiracy — although admittedly, a modest amount of money and an investment of time are probably less ruinous than most con-men’s schemes.

A hidden punch

As well, I can’t help thinking about all the times when narratives can also be used to mislead, deceive, or even just present a perspective that’s most flattering. Because there’s a slightly glorified place for “storytellers” — journalists included, to some extent — we don’t talk about how those narratives are active in, say, social circles and politics.

Yet there’s something to say for a satisfying plot arc in real life: a rise, success, and a well-deserved fall. As I write this, non-democratically and possibly fraudulently-elected President Donald Trump is undergoing both a swirling media storm and the early stages of impeachment. For my part, I find this particular exodus deeply satisfying and long overdue. But his rapidly-dwindling base of supporters, of course, see him as a man wronged and maltreated.

For instance, Andrew Scheer and Maxime Bernier, among other politicians, are presenting the narrative that immigration needs to be regulated to “keep us safe” — using ambiguous and hinting language and implying things without saying them directly. They’re invoking tropes, if you will, without saying them outright — more so in Bernier’s case, but still.

Journalists can wade into this fight, as can scientists, but presenting facts and figures and sharing the truth alone isn’t always enough — these, too, require the framing of a narrative to be acceptable by the public. Broadly speaking, journalists and scientists are pretty responsible, ethical people — but their work can be weaponized or misinterpreted as well, or presented out of context to reinforce a particular narrative.

The ugly truth

Narratives are also used in social circles to present some people as victims and others as abusers, or when we present ourselves in the best light in a particular situation. Sometimes the truth is a little more complex than tropes, unfortunately — and sometimes, we have to overcome our own self-perceptions to mend bridges. Although some events lend themselves to easier decision-making, not every incidence of wrongdoing is as cut and dried as a sexual assault case usually is. Kai Cheng Thom has an excellent column in the Daily Xtra about accountability and social tension in queer communities — something I’ve seen firsthand, and unfortunately, participated in as well, and her suggestions for restorative justice, accountability, and an overall philosophy of kindness are worth reading for everyone.

Part of the problem with viewing things narratively is that all of us are the protagonists and heroes in our own lives — which means we may not realise, or may not want to be honest about, our impact on others. It’s easy to worry about being someone’s big-bad-evil-guy, but sometimes, we’re just the reoccurring villain or the frienemy — and because of our own narrative perspectives, we may not realise it.

A way out

It can feel like we’re the pawns of greater narratives, or captive to our own desires, and to some extent, these things can be true — but only if we don’t rebel or at least reconsider what happens to us, as well as the impact of our own actions. Critical thinking has always been important, but in an era where production values have never been higher, it’s more than prudent to examine both our own presentations and those of others.

As always, what’s best in life and what’s most important come down to three things — the most pleasurable, the least harmful, and the best for others. Ideally, all three of these options or requirements should be fulfilled with our choices. Sometimes we have to choose between two of them, and there’s something to be said for debating precisely how our actions and choices fulfill these categories, but it’s a pretty good way to make decisions generally. At the very least, being aware of our own tendencies to be unreliable narrators and the pluralistic nature of truth will keep us both honest and cautious — and maybe even a little more forgiving.

***

Michelle Browne is a sci fi/fantasy writer and editor. She lives in Lethbridge, AB with her partner-in-crime and Max the cat. Her days revolve around freelance editing, knitting, jewelry, and learning too much. She is currently working on other people’s manuscripts, the next books in her series, and drinking as much tea as humanly possible.

Find her all over the internet: * OG Blog * Mailing list * Magpie Editing * Amazon * Medium * Twitter * Instagram * Facebook * Tumblr * Ko-fi

[twitchesandstitches]

HS Humans in Crossthicc - Descriptions!

The humans themselves, along with my headcanons for how they look here. In general, the post-scratch humans are the older generation, from 5 to 10 years older than the pre-scratch humans:

Jane Egbert: She was originally called Jane Crocker, but she has no wish to be associated with Crockercorp, nor her position as the Condesces’ legal heir. Polynesian, a definite BBW and a very strongfat build, she stands more than ten feet tall and is a walking tank and her powers function as this, making her a living wall that ignores all damage and heals what does get through. Crockertier cybernetics are imbedded through her, glowing blue and making her a very obvious cyborg. Likes to use a combat gourmand fork that can turn into a spoon, and she fancies herself a gourmand when it comes to foes. She tends to use her healing powers to restore people to health as a combat medic.

She started the army of chefs that keeps the fleet fed, and wrote up the principles of agriculture and livestock they follow to this day. She’s since become one of the heads of a corporation-analogue called the Carnival Bazaar; the fleet’s source of wealth, where they sell their goods as they travel from world to world. She’s less a CEO and more of an HR department head who keeps people stabilized and counseled, but in practice she runs the whole thing. She’s very close with Steven Universe, the two of them dating from time to time, and they’ve had many children together.

She is clearly mutated with troll mods; her blood is tinted faintly fuchsia, and she has a few mutations indicating her troll-themed genetic mix. She and Feferi are quite close, and the latter is responsible for stabilizing some of Jane’s complications.

John Egbert: A cheerful and helpful guy, and very tiny, standing below five feet tall. Polynesian, chubby, and incredibly solid for it with muscle. He drifts from ship to ship, going wherever he pleases, and proves to be popular wherever he goes and does his best to keep everyone happy. He’s extremely fast and mobile, and surprisingly destructive in a straight fight, using massive hammers bigger than he is.

Dated Vriska at some point and they’re still very close. No one is sure how the size difference was coped with but he doesn’t seem to mind being totally dominated by extremely large women.

Dirk Strider: Mechanics expert, roboticist, and key engineer in both shipcraft and mech maintenance, though he declines to actually pilot them. Aboriginal, a bit shorter than average (5’6), and has that bishounen ‘thin but pretty and fit’ look. His powers allow him to effect magic directly, and the soul directly; damaging their essence, or turning heroic spirit into raw damage. It gives him a great insight into creating AI, which led to the creation of  his… son? Brother? Something? Anyway, that’s where Li’l Hal came from.

Prefers not to put himself out there and likes being a support guy. “I don’t want to be the guy to kill the bad guy. I want to make the weapon that kills the bad guy.”

Dave Strider: Studies monsters of all kinds, and is a forensic expert and coroner. He also does part time in one of the many bands the fleet does in their flirtation with being cosmic pop stars. He doesn’t like fighting, but he exhibits absolutely absurd speed related to his growing powers of time travel. Aboriginal, smaller than Dirk (5’4), and on the plump side. MILFs of all kinds gravitate straight towards him in a ‘oh, you POOR Dear…!” way. He is the father of many children now, having a huge weakness for gentle, protective mom-types.

Roxy Lalonde: one of the fleet’s head scientists, heavily influential in their alchemizer program, and loves messing with bio mods for fun. Her playful demeanor hides how frighteningly smart she is, and she loves messing with people on account of it. (NOT an alcoholic of any sort here, either.) When she is involved in fighting, she uses high-powered rifles and does sniper duty. Indian, a classic hyper curvy hourglass and about seven and a half feet tall. She can manifest objects out of raw magic, but this takes a lot of work and requires her to understand them in and out. Has a lot of cat-themed mods that sometimes give her pink fur, a tail, cat ears, and functional claws.

A true mom friend to everyone around her, Roxy is a sweet and good-natured person who loves helping people and being a Science Hero FOR GREAT JUSTICE; she’s very passionate about what the fleet does, and actively encourages everyone to be more proactively heroic. She fears that she has a tendency towards addiction, and is compelled to mass produce children whenever she has the chance, with the possibility that she has an integrated alchemizer to ‘produce’ items herself through her powers.

Rose Lalonde: Expert in magical power and theory, specializing in arcane magic, but she also has channeled power from mysterious eldritch entities that are nonetheless apparently benign. They have left their mark on her; while she looks human if she concentrates, in her true form she is a monstrous eldritch monster girl, with tentacles for legs, glowing multiple rows of white eyes, and immense spookiness. Probably at least Roxy’s height, but can be a lot bigger as she powers up. Hard to say how her powers will interface in the AU, but she is certainly an EXTREMELY powerful magic user, on par with a D&D Warlock, and takes a methodical, experimental approach to her powers. Indian, pear-shaped, with very large hips, massive butt, thick tentacles, and large breasts. She tends to favor more inhuman mods, for more multiple… well, everything if she wants it. Her weapons of choice are a pair of deadly wands that channel her magic, and can stab really well too.

Rose is deeply spooky to a lot of people, and she enjoys unsettling others. She gets annoyed that John, Dave and the others don’t fall for it so much anymore. She has a close romance with Kanaya, whom she has had many children with, and they enjoy a mutual spooky aesthetic of eldritch/vampire goodness. She is deeply fascinated by the mystery of what happened in the ancient cataclysm, and has resolved to solve it.

Jake Harley: An explorer and famous fleet scout, often flying off on his own to report on new worlds and see if there is first contact to be made. Able to channel optimism and happiness into raw destructive power over a period of time, he’s situationally very powerful, but tends to be a glass cannon, easily taken out once he Does The Thing. He’s First Nations, and a massive super-cute beefcake of a man; he flexes and people thank him. Likes to use a pair of customized pistol-lasers that channel his powers. About seven feet tall. He may have some genuine angelic essence in him, which can be very spooky.

Jade Harley: A monstrously big and obscenely powerful amazon, so heavily modded that she looks like a werewolf girl even when not monsterized. Her heart has been replaced with an infinite energy generator, she calls it the green sun,, and it is powered by her own resolve, and she uses it to channel a wide variety of technologies secretly fueled by her own powers. She can alter space in many ways; shrinking herself and others, growing herself and others, opening portals, or unleashing incredibly destructive blasts of green energy. She is obscenely powerful, and one of the fleet’s heaviest hitters, bar none. She can even channel it into herself, giving her immense strength or size. She is First Nations, standing… however big she wants, but often over twelve feet high. Muscular and amazonian, she has absolutely enormous curves but focuses on gigantic breasts. Her canine mods are advanced enough that she has furry skin, canine features, and can generally pass as a low-level beastwoman. One of her favorite alternate forms is a dogtaur form. Jade turns Grimbark whenever she uses enough power, but this is more of a super mode, not a bad thing, and she just becomes a lot more aggressive and domineering.

Working heavily in the science departments, Jade is a major leader in the fleet, and a powerful witch as well. She takes a more carefree approach to her magic, doing whatever seems like an intriguing idea for her spells; an artist, to Rose’s technician. She is one of the most prominent human characters here, and her raw power is simply awe inspiring. She’s very sweet, if prone to sassiness and a short temper. She’s rather dominant with boys, too.

Joey Harley: She has no conflict with Jake here, so did not take another name out of spite. A talented dancer and xenopsychologist, she prefers to do ‘real work’ and research, but enjoys dancing and regularly demonstrates her skills at the fleet’s clubs. She is First Nation, with a bulk similar to Jade’s but slimmer, with smaller breasts; instead most of her curve mass is in her cybernetically enhanced legs, which are absurdly powerful. Her kicks are very strong, she can leap great distances, and she augments them further with special weaponized shoes with built-in cannons. Nine feet tall.

Jude Harley: A self-proclaimed strategist and existential threat theorist, he is deeply worried about the threats that the Ringers have supposedly seen, and organizes a group of people who are trying to figure it out as well. He otherwise works in the Zoo, the facility where the pet monsters, summon creatures, and powerlink beasts are cared for, and he happily tends towards the avian ones. He’s made a lot of friends with Flying-type Pokemon and avian Digimon as well. Built on broadly the same lines as Jake but shorter (a little under seven foot) and very softly built.

Li’l Hal: Dirk’s robotic offspring, and while an AI, he can upload himself into robotic bodies as he pleases. He and Dirk have a very complicated relationship, and with being often subject to harassment, oppression and worse by humans, he has a very negative attitude towards organics in general from sheer spite. He’s warmed up a bit since joining the fleet… to just being instantly suspicious of anyone outside the fleet. He’s in sincere love with Jane and Roxy, but doesn’t seem to realize it. He’s quite close with the other robots of the fleet, idolizing the Dinobots as liberators of robotkind, and wishes to one day upload into a Cybertronian frame.

Unexpectedly, he has his own share of unusual abilities unrelated to whatever body he is using. This appears to be related to soul-themed abilities; he can weaponize the essence of genuinely living beings, or tear organics apart at the very soul. While Dirk can destroy in ways he can’t Hal’s actual combat powers are superior to Dirk’s.

Squarewave and Sawtooth: Hal’s robot brothers, and performers in the fleet’s various bands, pop groups, metalheads, and other musical interests. Both of them are loyal to Dirk and are generally considered legally Striders, and think Hal needs to calm down on the ‘meatbags are out to GET US’ front. Squarewave uses destructive sonic attacks… by yelling really, really loud, and comes off as an earnest kid brother. Sawtooth, on the other hand, is just plain cool, everyone wishes they were as cool as that. It must be a Strider thing. He employs integrated weaponry and sonic weapons, often narrating his actions in musical form and working it into his performance.

The Consorts: A wide variety of strange creatures Roxy and Jade created, producing happy little creatures modeled after the canon consorts, and they seem happy to act as servants to the fleet as a whole, bustling in and tidying up or serving people, washing people in the communal baths, and so forth. The fleet tried to get them to be more independent and less servile, but they refused to listen, so they’re just left to their own cheerful devices.

[readingontheedge]

The Woman America Loves a Latte

by Holly Tierney-Bedord

Genre: Women's Fiction

 From the best-selling author of Sweet Hollow Women comes a quirky new thriller for fans of Megan Abbott, Liane Moriarty, and Carl Hiaasen. Veloura has never stood a chance. Raised by a junkie and orphaned as a teen, she's settled for a life of low expectations. She spends her days sprucing up the shack of a has-been bull rider and washing hair down at the local salon. But when it turns out her fiancé doesn't have her best interests at heart, she's forced to come up with a new plan for herself. An opportunity to be the spokesperson for a coffee chain means a bright future could be hers, if only she can stay ahead of her dark past. 

Goodreads * Amazon 

Holly Tierney-Bedord is the author of several novels and novellas including Sweet Hollow Women, The Woman America Loves a Latte, The Port Elspeth Jewelry Making Club, and Surviving Valencia. She's also an artist and miniaturist, creator of the mid-century dollhouse restoration blog flipthisminihouse.com, and the author of several non-fiction books about creating miniatures. She lives in Madison, Wisconsin. 

Website * Facebook * Twitter * Bookbub * Amazon * Goodreads 

“Suzie,” Vee was saying, “my life is finally coming together. Can you believe I’ve got a wedding to plan?”

Suzie wrapped her finger through the phone cord in her kitchen a couple of times. Her two-year-old daughter Britney was sick with the flu, down for a nap, so she’d taken personal days from both her jobs. Unfortunately, she still had to pay the daycare center, but it was nice to be home on a Monday.

“No, Vee, I can’t believe it. Have you totally given up on that guy who works at RadioShack?”

“God, yes, I’ve totally given up on him.”

“What about the guy at the frozen yogurt place? Or maybe just try being single for a while.”

“I can’t be single. Where would I live? Back in some rooming house with twenty other people?”

“I thought you liked New Horizons?”

“It was a halfway house, Suzie, which would have been okay, but when you’re the only person not recovering from an addiction, everyone gives you the coldest shoulder.”

“I guess you could stay here with us,” Suzie said. She held her breath, hoping Vee would say no.

“No, no. Don’t be crazy. I’ve got everything with Thunder. He’s a man. He owns his own home.”

“I hope you’re not marrying him for his dinky little house.”

“Gimme a break. I’m not that materialistic. I would never marry some guy for his house,” said Vee. “I’m just trying to tell you that, unlike every other guy I’ve ever dated, he’s an honest-to-goodness adultwith things like a bad back and real pots and pans. I need this kind of stability and support. Doesn’t everyone deserve that?”

“Yes, but I thought you said he stays out all night? How does that feel stable to you?”

“I think you get that with all guys, at least early on before they’re fully committed.”

“No, Vee, not all men are like that,” said Suzie.

“Anyway,” said Vee. “Let’s focus on the positive. Like how fast Thunder’s trying to make it all happen.”

“Really?” said Suzie. She was still doubtful whether Vee and Thunder were even engaged or if this was some kind of massive misunderstanding on the part of her friend.

“Really!” said Vee. “I asked him about an engagement ring on Monday—the day after he proposed, you know, wondering when we might want to go to the mall and try some on, and just like that, he disappeared. Left the house. Drove away. I was like, ‘Hey! Where’d he go?’ I thought maybe he was going to bail on me! But then later that same day he showed back up and gave me a ring! Can you believe it?”

“Barely,” said Suzie.

“I can’t believe you haven’t seen it yet. I’ve had it a whole week. It’s a little loose, but I figure I can wear it on my middle finger instead.”

“You could get it resized, you know,” said Suzie.

“Yeah, that costs money. So, on Tuesday I told Thunder I want to go dress shopping with you. And guess what?”

“He presented you with your wedding dress,” Suzie guessed. She lit a cigarette—one of her few guilty pleasures—and blew the smoke out the open window so it wouldn’t drift back to Britney’s room.

“Close,” said Vee, “and I’m going to ignore the sarcasm in your voice.”

“Okay, I give up. What happened next?” asked Suzie, feeling a little guilty that she wasn’t even faking being enthusiastic about any of this. 

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[rwdestuffs]

Done dirty: Salem, Hazel, and Tyrian.

Because I already did one for Cinder, and Watts hasn’t gotten developed yet.

Obligatory image:

(Because yes. This character is a better villain than Salem, Hazel, and Tyrian combined).

Salem, Hazel, and Tyrian are all villains. Ones that are interesting in concept, design, and even in voicing (most of the time (why does dust auto-tune voices?))

However, they utterly fail when it comes down to personality, execution, and motives.

Robbie Rotten has a better personality than those schmucks!

Let’s start with Tyrian.

Tyrian is basically just the “Axe-Crazy Villain.” He is there to fulfill that villain group trope, and not much else. And while his fighting style is really interesting (seriously, I want to see more faunus incorporate their trait in combat), his personality and motives have been done better before.

Let’s take the Joker and the Green Goblin for points of comparison. See, these two villains are crazy murderers. And they are extremely interesting. Both of them have killed their fair share of bystanders, and have shown no remorse for their actions (at least in Goblin form for Gobby. Though, it’s debatable if Osborn is actually crazy or not. It depends on the writer). If we had seen Tyrian tearing apart villagers, animals, and other innocent bystanders without even flinching, that would have helped with his creepiness factor, intimidation factor, crazy factor, and danger factor. 

But we don’t get that. Instead, he’s just religiously devoted to Salem like a cultist. He hates displeasing her, and we don’t see much else other than that.

Contrast to Goblin, who killed one of Spider-Man’s girlfriends, and has been a constant thorn in his side ever since his introduction.

Joker is constantly trying to push Batman to break his one rule, and is one of the most iconic villains of all time.

These two also work as a means to contrast the respective heroes that they face. While Batman is order and justice from the shadows, Joker is chaos and destruction in the light. One of them is dead serious all the time, and the other is comedic. One wears colors that match, the other doesn’t. The only real thing they have in common is a lack of mental stability, and that’s about it.

As for Spidey and Goblin, they also have their fair share of contrasts. Spidey is a young man trying to take responsibility for his actions and make up for what he didn’t do, while Goblin is a CEO trying to make money through irresponsible means. Spidey uses his natural abilities with a bit of gadgetry in fights, Goblin uses gadgetry along with a bit of his natural abilities in fights. Spidey is poor, Goblin is rich. The big thing they have in common is that they’re both patterned after things that are normally associated with ‘scary things’ and that’s about it.

Tyrian doesn’t really serve as this. Unless you count his devotion to Salem as a warning to not have total devotion to Ozpin as a contrast, there’s nothing that really justifies a rivalry with others. He’s just a crazy guy and that’s about it.

Hazel is next, and this is actually more a case of disappointment if anything.

As I alluded to in a previous post about villains, Hazel fails because his motives are uninteresting and stupid.

Again, for counterpart comparisons, we look towards Spider-Man and Batman again for the “Tragic Villain” trope done right.

Mr Freeze, and The Lizard.

I think we all know how tragic Mr Freeze’s backstory is by now. His wife was dying and when he wanted to try to save her, the company he worked for cut the funding to his lab, and he ended up dowsed in chemicals to the point that he could no longer survive outside sub-zero temperatures. He’s the poster man of the “Tragic Villain” trope, and it’s hard to not sympathize with him should this backstory be used for whatever continuity is being done at the moment.

The Lizard is a lesser-known example, due to this aspect of his backstory not often being shown or used, but he’s a tragic villain through and through. He was an army surgeon who lost his arm, and when he tried to find a way to restore it, he ended up with a Jekyll and Hyde situation. He’s ended up losing his family because of this, and it’s hard to not sympathize with him due to his situation of simply wanting to get better. You know that deep down, there’s a good man, but he still needs to be stopped.

Hazel on the other hand, is a Straw Hypocrite.

Yes, Hazel. Calling out Ozpin on putting children in danger while you’re crushing a teenager’s skull is totally going to make your point valid.

How many times have people said that his backstory is stupid?

Unless Ozpin gave Hazel’s sister the same ‘choice’ as Pyrrha, then he is in NO position to make this kind of argument. Oscar is right in this conversation in the sense that Gretchen made a choice to be a huntress, and knew the risks.

Hazel’s story fails not only because of how hypocritical Hazel was acting in that moment, but also for how stupid he is.

If Hazel’s sister died, it was likely that she died in a grimm hunt. Now, I could point out the absurdity of a hunter dying on a grimm hunt when a freaking Corgi could beat one, but I digress. Hazel then decided to work for the Queen of the grimm. Given how downright stupid this is, it’s no wonder that Hazel fell from good graces in the eyes of many. With a backstory that poorly thought-out, we may need a retcon or two to make it effective.

Salem is the last one on this list, and she doesn’t fare much better. She’s supposed to be the Big Bad to all of her minions, and quite possibly the Bad Boss, but her minions not being intimidating, interesting, or at all deadly puts a dent in this.

Not only are the grimm really bad mooks (again, Zwei took one down), but her human minions are incompetent. Only Cinder actually did anything of note. She was the one who got the Fall Maiden’s powers. She killed Ozpin and forced him to possess another vessel. She defeated Pyrrha Nikos- Cinder! The woman who sounds like she just came from the set of a porno directed and written by a crappier Tommy Wiseau!

Tyrian failed at capturing Ruby, Hazel got beaten by Nora, Leo was downed by Oscar, the grimm are basically cannon fodder, and the White Fang are dubious in how they play into the whole thing. Unless we count Adam as being part of Salem’s Inner Circle (Which, according to the Wiki, he is not), then there’s no reason to fear Salem!

Let’s take a look at some Marvel and DC villains (again) to see how this would work properly.

Darkseid and Thanos.

Darkseid is actually intimidating. He’s taken on Superman, and has even got his own minions that are actually intimidating. Say what you want about the Parademons from the crappy live-action movie, but at least they’re intimidating enough that the Amazons don’t want to deal with them. And they’re made from the remains of other species that the forces of Apokolips raze.

As for Thanos, I’m sure we know about him thanks to Infinity War. The Order of the Black Circle (yes, that is what they’re called) is intimidating. One of them can take on Doctor Strange, Iron Man, and Spider-Man; another can go toe-to-toe with Vision, Captain America, Scarlet Witch, Falcon, and Black Widow; and another can take on the Hulk Buster armor. And that’s not even counting the comic where they can take on the entire team of Avengers at once.

But as for Salem?- Her minions aren’t intimidating. They aren’t effective, they aren’t interesting, they aren’t deadly. They’re just… there.

Like I mentioned in my aforementioned post about villains, Salem fails at being intimidating because not only are her minions not effective, but they aren’t really that terrified of failing her.

And her lack of motivation and backstory doesn’t help much at all.

They are not number one. They’re not even two, three, four…

Twenty-one million five-hundred-thirty-six-thousand three-hundred-forty-five, or even Twenty-one million five-hundred-thirty-six-thousand three-hundred-forty-six. They are number Twenty-one million five-hundred-thirty-six-thousand three-hundred-forty-seven. That’s how low they are.

[mariequitecontrarie]

People Will Talk: Part 2

Summary: Atticus Gold and newcomer Belle French have developed a relationship no one in Storybrooke approves of, and people make their opinion known in small-minded, small-town fashion: he’s too old for her, and the pretty young librarian needs to find friends her own age. When Gold ends the relationship to protect Belle’s reputation, the town turns on him again. To make matters worse, his friends and family are mad at him, too. But as we all know, love wins in the end. Chapter Summary: Gold hasn't seen Belle in two weeks and Alice is not happy with him. Belle gets an unpleasant surprise. Rating / Word Count: T / 3000  A/N: Continuing Marie’s Three-Year Writing Anniversary Rumor/Assumed Fake Dating/Family AU that no one asked for. @maplesyrupao3 -- bless you!

On AO3

Part 1 on AO3 | Part 1 on Tumblr

Two Weeks Later

“Alice, why are you looking at me like that?”

Gold held his breath and waited, cursing himself for asking. He was guaranteed not to like the answer, but anything was better than the silent treatment.

Alice stopped dusting the cabinet of china dolls to fix him with another poisonous glare. “Because you’re a horse’s ass who has more money than brains.”

“Noted. Can you at least keep up with your duties while you insult me? Time is still money, dearie, even here in the barnyard.” Squabbling, at least, was familiar territory.

Gold waved a hand around the tidy pawnshop, wondering who worked for whom. He owned the store, but Alice called the shots. Sometimes it seemed like his only job was bankrolling Alice’s Amazon Prime spending sprees while she worked her way through Storybrooke College.

The only person he knew who shopped more than Alice was...no, he wasn’t going there.

Still glowering at him like he was something she scraped from the bottom of her shoe, Alice worked her way around the perimeter of the shop with her feather duster. He had to admit she did keep the cobwebs at bay and his stockroom organized, even if she annoyed the hell out of him in the process.

He glanced at the restored cuckoo clock on the wall. It was almost lunchtime, and Alice had been scowling at him since she’d shown up for work this morning. Trying to ignore her, he eased behind the counter and opened the books.

She fell silent for a short, precious moment, then slapped her hands on the countertop.“Ha! I know what your problem is. You’re in a foul temper because you haven’t seen your sweetheart. Belle hasn’t popped in for two weeks. What’s wrong? Lovers’ quarrel?”

“Beg pardon?” he asked, pretending to study his ledgers.

Feigning ignorance never worked on Alice. So like a Jones. Stubborn and mouthy, just like her father. She continued to bore holes into the top of his head, muttering to herself about how he was apologizing to the wrong person until he looked up with a long-suffering sigh.

Talking, talking. Why was the girl always talking? An ocular migraine threatened to form, sharp and urgent above his nose. Tiny sparks exploded in his peripheral vision, and he pressed his fingers against his forehead.

He supposed he could send his little conscience home from work to get her out of his way, but she was more than an employee—she was his goddaughter—and he’d promised Hook he would keep tabs on Alice while he was at sea. Killian “Hook” Jones’ career as a Naval officer meant lengthy tours of duty up to six months, and he knew Alice and her papa missed each other dreadfully while he was away. Guilt poked his conscience; he hadn’t emailed Hook with an update in at least two weeks. But he knew his oldest (and only) friend would question him about Belle, and he was neither willing to lie nor ready to confide. Besides, he reasoned, Alice could text her papa anytime she wanted with her smartphone thingy.

“If you’re not going to work, why don’t you study?” he murmured, trying to concentrate on his July sales numbers. “Isn’t there a women’s lit paper due tomorrow or something?”

“Books!” she shouted, making him jump. “That’s it! Why don’t you take these books back to the library for me?”

Alice plopped a pile of novels on top of the financials, jarring him from his thoughts. He pinched the bridge of his nose hard. Now he would have to rework the column of numbers all over again.

“I was hoping to get advice from Belle on a dress for my date with Robin on Friday, but this’ll give you an excuse to see her instead.” Alice grinned, delighted with her solution.

He shoved the books aside with a huff. “I’m not looking for an excuse.”

“Why the hell not?” Abandoning the pretense of working entirely, she dropped the feather duster on the floor and hoisted herself up on top of the counter.

He set his teeth on edge. “Belle and I aren’t friends anymore.”

“Friends?” She smirked. “If you’re friends, then I’m straight. Hate to break it to you, Uncle Atty, but you two have never been friends. She’s in love with you! And you love her, too.”

“What makes you say so?” he asked carefully, looking at his nails.

“Oh, I don’t know. The dark circles under your eyes. The constipated look on your face. You look like a saggy, twitchy, miserable old man.” She held up a brown paper bag. “Want a sandwich?”

He turned around, assessing his appearance in the antique mirror that hung on the wall behind the cash register. “I am a saggy, twitchy, miserable old man,” he snapped. “And no, I’m not hungry.”

“When Belle’s around, you look all soft and floppy and happy, like Rabbit does whenever I come home.” Alice smiled another cheeky grin.

He smiled back at her in spite of himself. “Well, I’ve been called worse, dearie, but If you’re expecting to bring me to heel like that stupid old dog of yours, it’ll be a cold day in hell.” He slammed the ledger closed and headed for the workroom. The girl trailed after him, still clutching her paper sack.

“I have egg salad,” she teased, shaking the bag. “Your favorite.”

It used to be. He shuddered, his stomach lurching. Eggs were a definite no. Now whenever he saw any sort of egg concoction, he thought of Belle’s pinched, white face on that hot July afternoon thirteen days ago when he ended their friendship. Not that he was counting the days since they’d been apart.

“I don’t eat eggs anymore,” he said. “Too much cholesterol.” No one knew his house had been egged besides Belle, and he wasn’t going to whine about it to Alice. He still had some pride. “You don’t like eggs, you don’t like Belle.” Alice spread her hands wide and twirled in a circle. “What do you like, Sam-I-Am?”

He pulled a face. “Peace and quiet. Both seem to be in short supply.”

Laughing at his sour expression, she plopped down on one of the stools at the work table and dangled her sandwich in front of his nose. “How about marmalade? I’ll trade ya.”

Alice was volunteering to eat the egg salad and offering her favorite lunch. Things really were as bad as they seemed, then. “Fine.”

Resigned, he sat down beside her, accepting half of the sandwich. He took a small bite to stop her prattling, but he had no appetite. Food had no flavor, the whole world drained of color and light without Belle. He missed her; her laughter, her touches, her insatiable appetite for stuffed crust pizza.

“Eat,” Alice insisted, clucking over him like a little mama.

He swallowed the bite of sandwich and forced himself to take another. “So, did you choose a dress for your date?” he asked, attempting both to change the subject and rejoin the land of the living. “Where are you and Robin going?”

“It’s just Tony’s.” Alice shrugged like the occasion was no big deal, and took a massive bite of her sandwich.

A six month anniversary is an important milestone.” He took out his pocket square and folded it into a perfect crown, trying not to be hurt that she hadn’t asked his advice. “Your father wouldn’t know style if it bit him on the arse, but I know my way around a clothing boutique.”

“I know,” she said around a mouthful of egg salad. “But I was kinda wanting the opinion of another woman. No offense.”

‘Another woman’ meant Belle. He cleared his throat. “None taken.” Not for the first time he was reminded that walking away from Belle didn’t only affect him. Alice looked up to Belle like an older sister, and he hoped his relationship failings weren’t driving a wedge between Alice and Belle, too.

Poking at the crust on his sandwich, he wondered what Belle was doing right now. She was probably balancing a book on her lap while she ate, dropping sandwich crumbs between the pages and... no. Gold mentally slapped himself. Cutting a person out of your life meant giving up the right to wonder.

Alice polished off the first half of her sandwich and started on the second. “Belle was at Granny’s the other night,” she offered slyly, employing her uncanny knack for reading his mind.

He choked on the sticky bit of bread in his mouth. “Oh? With anyone?” Ugh . When it came to the people he cared about, he was terrible at nonchalance.

“Yeah. Tall bloke with sparkling blue eyes and a strong, lean jaw.” She batted her eyelashes. “Didn’t recognize him, but it looked like a date.”

Date? Belle had gone on a date? He would find out who the bastard was and he would crush his windpipe with his cane. Gold looked down at his hands. They were coated in marmalade, the mangled sandwich crushed between his palms.

“Way to play it cool, Uncle Atty.” Alice smirked and he rose to wash his sticky hands. “I’m kidding. But I wouldn’t have made a joke if I knew you were this upset. Belle was at a booth with some other people. Ruby, Mulan, and Mary Margaret. Waved at me once, but she was picking at her food and staring at the wall whenever I tried to catch her eye. It’s obvious she’s missing you. Can’t you fix this?”

“I couldn’t possibly be intelligent enough to do that,” he said, grateful sarcasm was there to cover his relief at Belle not being on a date after all.

“Mmm, I see.” Alice rolled her eyes. “She’s the first woman who saw through your little act, isn’t she? Now you’re grouchy because you’ve gone and screwed up the best thing in your life because some Granny, Marco, and some other ignorant busybodies have their noses out of joint. Since when are you afraid of them, anyway?”

“Afraid? Ha!” He flashed his gold tooth in a warning snarl. This conversation was ridiculous.

“Cripes, this place can be so backward. Even the clock doesn’t move here.” Alice gestured down the street toward the clock tower, which had been stuck at 8:15 for twenty years. “I’d say we’re living in a land time forgot, but it’s been a common practice in most societies for younger women and older men to marry for generations.”

“Marry?” He sputtered. “Who said anything about marriage?”

“Obviously not you!”

He crossed his arms and grunted. “Reverse psychology doesn’t work on me, child. I used to change your nappies.”

“That’s right, you did. So why are you pretending I don’t know you?” She swallowed the rest of her sandwich in a gulp and chased it with half a can of Dr. Pepper soda. “People whisper all sorts of wicked things about me. Some of them are true and some of them are outright lies. We’re alike in that way, you and I. So what? If I paid attention to what everyone said, I’d never leave the house.”

“I know, honey.” He smoothed his hands over the smooth grain of the worktable, ashamed of himself. Alice had more than her share of bad days, days when she couldn’t come into work. Times when she came to the shop and wandered around as though in a dream, trailing her fingers through cabinets coated in dust, a faraway look in her eyes. What he suffered was nothing in comparison, and yet he couldn’t seem to ignore the thick fog of prejudice and judgment that suffocated him whenever he was with Belle.

“People talk no matter what we do; doesn’t mean we have to listen.” She patted his shoulder. “You sure as hell don’t listen to me, and I talk your head off every damn day.”

He gave her a fond smile and kissed the top of her head. “Don’t remind me.”

Day after day of pretending she was fine was exhausting, but Belle had been doing a fair job of holding herself together since Gold had unceremoniously dumped her on his front porch. She wasn’t sure it counted as a dump if you only fantasized you were a couple, but according to the ache in her chest, it was real.

The busier the day, the better. If she kept moving from task to task, she could ignore her shattered heart. She showed up for her library shifts without fail, she checked books in and out, and chattered with people about their lives. Today she had even helped several eleventh graders with their Marie Antoinette biographies. Staying busy was working until the last hour of the day when the flow of patrons slowed to a trickle and she sat down at her desk to open the mail.

She quickly sorted through the typical bills, catalogs, and overdue fine payments, arranging them into piles. A plain, clean white envelope addressed directly to her stood out from the rest of the mail, and she saved it for last. There was no return address, but the faint scent of antiseptic clung to the crisp envelope.

Belle ripped the envelope open and a drawing sketched on a piece of ruled notebook paper floated to the floor. What she saw made her bite down on her lip hard, the metallic tang of blood filling her mouth. It was a crude illustration, but she could make out the Beast from the movie Beauty and the Beast , drawn wrinkled and old, wearing a suit and tie and clenching a cane in his gnarled claw. He was ogling a young woman who was reading a book. The woman wore a version of movie Belle’s famous golden dress, but the skirt barely grazed her thigh and the bodice dipped all the way to her navel. Clearly, the image was meant to be of her and Gold.

She stared down at the crude representation, then crumpled it in her fist. It was a cheap attempt at an insult, drawing her to look like some sort of slutty temptress and Gold as a dirty old man. Rage ripped through her in a white-hot streak, and her mind narrowed to a singular purpose: finding out who had done this. Tonight.

Belle shot to her feet, knocking over her chair.

Granny’s Diner was the social hub of Storybrooke, and the best place to get to the bottom of nonsense, but she was far too impatient to wait until the library closed. She chased the last few stragglers out of the library and slammed the door behind her, jamming the key in the lock with shaking hands until it clicked. With frayed nerves, she stomped all the way to Granny’s, the drawing clutched in her closed fist. The early August evening air was warm and humid, and sweat trickled down her back as she marched down Main Street. While she hurried down the sidewalk, she tried to puzzle out who had drawn and sent the picture and why. Rumors and innuendo aside, there was something perplexing about caring so much for Gold and yet holding physical evidence that other people couldn’t see the tender, handsome man she knew.

Small towns produced small minds.

The tables at Granny’s were packed. It was Thursday during dinner rush—the most popular night—and people clustered inside the front door and on the patio outside, waiting for the chance to sit down. All the barstools were occupied, platters and baskets of food sitting in front of every person. Good. Belle wanted a large audience for what she was about to do.

She toed off her heels and climbed up on the counter. Mr. Clark from the pharmacy stared at her in horror, then sneezed and wrapped an arm around an enormous, sauce-covered square of lasagna, drawing it closer for protection. Ruby stood frozen at the cash register, and Ashley Boyd narrowly missed dropping the tray of dirty dishes she was carrying, almost colliding with town psychiatrist Archie Hopper as she narrowly saved the plates from slipping to the floor.

Behind the counter, Granny made an outraged, sputtering noise, the heat of her glare rivaling the sizzling grill. At the moment, it didn’t matter if Granny never sold her another hamburger or slice of chocolate cake for the rest of her life, Belle was getting some answers tonight . She turned around and faced the crowd.

“Who did this?” Belle called out, looking down over the sea of faces. She held up the drawing, still clenched in her shaking fist. The noise continued to drone on around her, the clatter of forks against plates, the townspeople oblivious to anything but their meals and their conversations. “I said who did this?”

“Look, Mommy!” yelled a blonde girl with curly pigtails. “That lady is fifty feet tall!” A hush came over the diner in a languid wave and all eyes turned to stare at Belle standing on the counter. Forks were laid down on plates with a quiet clatter. Time seemed to stand still and no one appeared to so much as breathe.  

“Does anyone want to confess?” she asked, shaking the drawing in her fist and glaring around the restaurant with narrowed eyes.

When no one stepped forward or admitted guilt, she dropped the drawing on the counter and ground it into the tile with her bare heel. “You’re all a bunch of cowards, you know that? Mr. Gold and I are friends, and it’s no one’s business but ours what we do. Your problem isn’t that he’s befriended a woman a few years younger than he is. Your problem is you’re a classless bunch of small-minded prigs.”

Jaws dropped and they gaped at her like fish in an aquarium, then fell back to their eating and chattering as though people stood on top of Granny’s counter raving like lunatics every day of the week.

Her limbs shook with anger, and she caught the sympathetic eyes of Mary Margaret and David Nolan. One minute they were sitting at the counter holding hands and sharing a basket of chicken fingers and the next thing she knew, they were flanking her, standing one on each side, like a pair of orderlies preparing to strap her into a straight jacket and wheel her away.

“Okay, Belle, that’s enough now, honey.” Mary Margaret’s voice was quiet and soothing, and Belle felt her knees begin to give out.

[phantom-le6]

Film Review - Wonder Woman 84

Carrying on with my film review interval quickly so I can get on to reviewing the Batman animated series, it’s time to join DC a bit early, albeit in the live-action world of the DCEU as we take a look at Wonder Woman 84…

Plot (as adapted from Wikipedia):

A young Diana (Wonder Woman) participates in an athletic event on Themyscira against older Amazons. After falling from her horse due to looking back at her opponents, Diana takes a shortcut and remounts, but misses a checkpoint. Antiope removes her from the competition, explaining anything worthwhile must be obtained honestly.

 In 1984, Diana works at the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, D.C. while secretly performing heroic deeds as Wonder Woman. New museum employee Barbara Ann Minerva, a shy geologist and cryptozoologist, is barely seen by her co-workers and comes to envy Diana. Later, the FBI asks the museum to identify stolen antiquities from a robbery that Wonder Woman recently foiled. Barbara and Diana notice one item, later identified as the Dreamstone, contains a Latin inscription claiming to grant the holder one wish.

 Barbara wishes to become like Diana, which unwittingly results in her acquiring the same superpowers, while Diana unknowingly wishes for her deceased lover Steve Trevor to be alive, resurrecting him in another man's body; the two are reunited at a Smithsonian gala. Failing businessman Maxwell "Max Lord" Lorenzano tricks Barbara and steals the Dreamstone, hoping to use its power to save his bankrupt oil company. He wishes to "become" the stone and gains its wish-granting powers, becoming a wealthy and powerful figure who creates chaos and destruction as his powers trigger worldwide instability.

 Barbara, Diana and Steve discover that the Dreamstone was created by Dolos/Mendacius, the god of mischief, also known as the Duke of Deception. It grants a user's wish while exacting a toll unless they renounce the wish or destroy the stone. Although Diana's power and Barbara's humanity diminish, both are unwilling to renounce their wishes. Learning from the U.S. President of a satellite system that broadcasts signals globally, Max, whose powers are causing his body to deteriorate, plans to globally grant wishes to steal strength and life force from the viewers and regain his health. Diana and Steve confront him at the White House, but Barbara, now aligned with Max, betrays Diana and knocks her down, escaping with Max on Marine One. Steve convinces Diana to renounce her wish and let him go, restoring her strength and gaining an ability to fly.

 Donning the Armor of Amazon warrior Asteria, Diana flies to the satellite headquarters and again battles Barbara, who has transformed into a humanoid cheetah after wishing to become an apex predator. Following a brutal match, Diana tackles Barbara into a lake and electrocutes her, then pulls her out. She confronts Max and uses her Lasso of Truth to communicate with the world through him, persuading everyone to renounce their wishes. She then shows Max visions of his own unhappy childhood and of his son, Alistair, who is frantically searching for his father amid the chaos. Max renounces his wish and reunites with Alistair and Barbara returns to normal. Sometime later in the winter, Diana meets the man whose body Steve possessed.

 In a post-credits scene, Asteria is revealed to be secretly living among humans.

Review:

Unlike a lot of people, I have enjoyed a lot of the DC Extended Universe to date.  Granted, most of their films have been flawed to varying extents, more-so than I’ve known with the MCU, and in truth only Man of Steel and the first Wonder Woman solo films cleared top marks.  Warner Brothers and DC are clearly trying, and while they might not succeed with live action the way they do with their animated DC films, I think we can all at least commend the effort.  Certainly, that effort shows through in this film, which is both sequel to the first live-action Wonder Woman film and a further prequel to Wonder Woman’s present-day self in Batman vs Superman and Justice League.  It’s well-cast around a decent plot, and offers both the action and character most audiences expect from films of this genre.

 However, the film is not without flaw, and these become more prevalent looking at the behind-the-scenes stories and features than through watching the film itself.  First, let’s tackle the couple of controversies that have come from the observations of others.  According to Wikipedia, the film has been criticised heavily on two counts.  First, Steve Trevor is brought into the film by possessing another man’s body in a plot thread analogous to 80’s era body-swap films like Vice Versa.  Because Steve and Diana have sex at one point during this time, this aspect is likened by some to rape despite that not being the intent of the film makers.  The second point of controversy is a scene where Wonder Woman saves Muslim children from being run over, something that is apparently controversial because actress Gal Gadot once served in the Israeli Defence Forces and has spoken in support of them.

 With regards to the first, I think the film makers needed to make it clearer that while Steve is doing his possession bit, the body’s native soul is totally elsewhere, as that might have changed how some perceived the scene.  Me, I’ve taken it from the first as just Steve and Diana without that exposition, and I think we can be a little too quick to assign the concept of ‘rape’ to certain sci-fi and superhero fantasy concepts.  This criticism strikes me as people wanting to be louder on a subject that is better tackled by being smarter about it, but I do think it’s probably something story tellers need to be mindful of going forward.  If you’re going to set up something that could look like rape if not explained fully, make the time to do that, no matter how it may hurt other aspects of your story.

 With the second, I tend to look at every religious conflict now and in the past and think “will you just grow up and stop having such massive-ass hissy fits over a bunch of stories that might not even be true?” Honestly, I don’t get why so many Christians, Muslims and Jews have to have massive conflicts with each other supposedly over faith.  You’re all worshipping the same deity, for crying out loud, and odds are 50/50 as to whether that deity even exists or not.  That’s honestly not worth keeping up a bunch of rivalry and hatred that started thousands of years ago; these days, it’s just an excuse.  Got land that’s holy to more than one religion?  Just share it.  Don’t like someone else’s religion and want to stick to your own?  Just say “thanks but no thanks” and carry on about your business.  That’s the mature, adult approach, and by the same token, just accept that it’s Wonder Woman saving some kids and leave the personal politics to your own story-telling.

 So, having dismissed the quibbles of the possibly over-reactionary viewers, let’s get into the bigger issues.  In terms of adaptation accuracy, the film is mostly good, but falls a bit short on Maxwell Lord.  The guy’s supposed to be a pretty irredeemable slimeball going by the comics, and while I can accept the film giving him some justification for taking things too far, I have a hard time buying into him effectively doing the ‘right thing’ at the film’s climax. It feels highly out of character, not to mention a bit anti-climactic.  Then again, that’s why I’ve never enjoyed superhero match-ups that pit a massively over-powered hero against a villain who is all about brains.  Such clashes make it impossible for the superhero to win in classic physical combat and gain the catharsis that comes from that.  It almost feels like that part should have come first and the grudge-match with Cheetah should have followed it.

 More significant an issue than that, however, is the idea that the whole wish fulfilment aspect of the plot was somehow people seeking lies and needing to accept the truth.  Wishes are not lies; wishes are wishes and have no set place in the truth-versus-lie dichotomy.  As such, truth is not by any means the answer to things when wishes go wrong.  Wishes going wrong is simply a literary device used to convey the idea that somehow wishing is bad, but it’s not.  After all, how many people who worked on this film wished at some point they’d be able to bring Wonder Woman to life on the big screen? Every film, every TV show, every book, every story anyone has ever created is the execution of a wish.

 The reality is that wishes only become a problem as a result of greed, which is the problem created by Max Lord in this film. If he’d just wished to hit oil to save his company, he’d be fine and things wouldn’t have escalated.  Instead, he takes on the Dreamstone’s power itself so he could exact his own price from future wishers, and as a result he upsets the stupidly precarious balance that keeps the world going.  It’s an interesting idea, albeit not all that original; leaving aside the classic “monkey’s paw” legend and others like it, you’ve only got to look at the Jim Carry film Bruce Almighty and Carrey’s character Bruce granting all prayers while using God’s powers to know wish fulfilment is dangerous in excess.  However, anything in excess is dangerous, and it’s not like wishing worked out so badly for Aladdin if we go by Disney’s versions of that story.

 The reality of WW84 is that it’s a decent film that’s mostly well-acted and has a decent story, but with a flawed underlying message that gets bogged down by various flaws in execution.  If I had to pick out a film that illustrates why the DCEU needs the Flash solo film to reboot it, this one would have to be right up there with Justice League, Aquaman and Birds of Prey.  Like those films, this one only warrants 7 out of 10, and much of that is down to a lot of the actors performing so well, especially Lilly Aspell as the kid version of Diana in the opening scene.  Only 10 years old at the time of filming and she did every stunt herself; an impressive feat to say the least.

[ravenclawelitist239]

Throne of Glass

Throne of Glass (Throne of Glass, #1) by

Sarah J. Maas

Series:

Throne of Glass #1

Published by

Bloomsbury USA Children’s

on August 7th 2012Genres:

Fantasy

Pages: 404

Stars: 4.5

Foreword

Now, when I say this book is a mess, I dont mean that I didn’t like it or that it was a bad book, believe me, it wasn’t. I had to wait 3 months to read this book because of everyone in my area wanting to read. I had to fight someones grandma to finally get my paws on this book, and let me tell you, it was worth it! When I tell you this book was good, my hands were calloused from turning the pages nonstop. I finished the whole book in one day! After reading several “decent” books in a row, this was just what I needed to restore my faith in books.SynopsisCelaena Sardothien is the best assassin in the land (so we are told) with a tricky past. Sentenced to a year of labor in a literal death camp where she is beaten and whipped, she has given up hope of escape after nearly being killed attempting to do so. Just when all hope seems lost, the Crown Prince and Captain of the Guards arrive to shackle her and drag her to the royal castle, where she thinks she is sentenced to death. On the way there, instead of worrying about her future, she is to busy considering how she can kill everyone around her because you know, she’s such a deadly assassin. (or so we are told)Turns out she isn’t going to die. Well, she wont if she becomes the King’s champion. In order for that to happen, she must compete in a hunger-games like tournament where participants engage in months worth of training and killing in a final fight to the death where one will stand to become the King’s personal champion/lapdog.This all sound pretty sweet to Celeana because she is a deadly assassin who wont have any problem defeating like 23 other people in a death match. The only thing that bothers her is that she has to operate under a secret alias so that no one knows who she is because if they find out who she is, they will all go running home in fear. She considers this a major blow to her pride.Everything is going well, Celeana is excelling at everything, but some maniac has decided to start killing the competitors mid-way through the competition and everyone is freaking out trying to find the culprit. In the middle of it all, Celeana must navigate through supernatural forces, betrayals and politics, and love interest(s).

My Thoughts on the Characters, Plot, World Building

“My name is Celaena Sardothien. But it makes no difference if my name’s Celaena or Lillian or Bitch, because I’d still beat you, no matter what you call me.”

This book was totally blowing up in my feed. EVERYONE and their mom seemed to have read this book before me and loved it, so me being the ardent bookworm that I am, went to my local library and put it on hold. I waited 3 months, but when I got it, I was so in love with the cover. It was so shiny and pretty that I threw aside the book I was just reading [Shadow and Bone] to read this book. I read the first 10 pages, and kinda wasn’t really feeling it so I went to the park and sat down under my favorite tree and spent the whole day reading the book and it was soooo good. Like, I just loved the book so much and was smirking at every bit of dialogue because it was just so goood.Celeana. She is really just one of those characters that that you slowly love more and more as the book goes on. Honestly, at the beginning, I didn’t like her. She just has that effect on me for like the first hundred 100 pages. One, because she seemed so vain and arrogant. She has just been released to live in a freaking death camp ad has to compete in a gosh darn death match and the only thing she seemed to care about was how pretty she was and how handsome the prince was. However, her backstory was just so sad and depressing, especially when you consider the fact that she is only like 17. If I had went through what she did at 17, I would’ve been driven crazy. Like, I go crazy when I stub my toe or accidentally cut my finger washing the dishes. She was whipped and beaten and watched her friends and family die. At freaking 17. Everyone I knew was giving the book like 2 stars because they didn’t think Celeana should’ve been as girly and arrogant as she was just because she was a deadly assassin. I get where people are coming from, but there isn’t an assassin rule book that says all assassins should be sulky, depressed monsters who wear black and carry knives in their shoes. I loved how Sarah J Maas purposely set her apart from what she thought people felt as though Celeana should’ve been. Most authors make their heroines weak, insecure, and dependent on a man. Celeana was beautiful, strong, and clever and she knew it. While she does have love interest(s), that isn’t the whole focus of the story and she conquers her battles pretty much by herself and takes the initiative.

The fact that she could still smile after being sent to a death camp makes me respect her so much. Also, she has to fight for the man that destroyed everything she loved.

I wont go into all the characters, but I will talk about Dorian and Chaol [Kale? Kol?]. Ok, the love triangle was really predictable and everything and I am not mad at Celeana for it, because its not like they are terrible men. They are both intelligent and arent desperate for her attention. They do their own thing and are even best friends. While I do think Dorian is a little boring and cliche’, I do respect him as a character, because I know how it feels to have apathetic and cruel parents. Not to much is revealed about Chaol, but I really loved him as a character. He actually challenged Celeana and wanted the best for her.Let me take the time out to mention my favorite character, Nehemia. She was so amazing, and strong. She wants the best for herself and her country and she is the perfect friend for Celeana because she isn’t afraid to put her in her place. I cant wait to see what Maas does with her in the future.The world building is so amazing. The map in the front of the book is beautiful, and the world seems like a lot of thought was put into it. The plot however really wasn’t. The contest is laughably set up. The trials and tests seems like they were thought up out of a stereotypical like gladiator movie or something. Like seriously, she had to climb a wall [one person died], shoot a bow, test some poisons [dont worry, no one died because they had antidotes] and to Celeana, it was never any issue. The night before every test, she didn’t spend practicing or thinking about it, she would just be thinking about Dorian or Chaol. And the tests only took up like 5 pages each at a maximum and some were even talked about in like one sentence. Especially toward the end. Celeana would be like, “Oh yeah, there was a test today, but Dorian looked so cute and I wonder how I can make Chaol laugh tomorrow.” The king seemed very cartoon villainy and gets like 5 mentions total and 2 instances where we meet him and the minor characters are laughable. Especially, the lame girl that kept trying to get with Dorian.My issue with Celeana

While, I did love Celeana, I also had several issues with her. For one, the author is a master of tell and not show. She tells us how amazing Celeana is at pretty much everything from pianos to swordsmanship to man snatching. We even get a small display of how amazing her fighting is when she took out a full grown man with little to no effort. We never get shown much of anything else. We get told how amazingly stunning she is and every time her powers come into play, everyone revers and fears her and talks about how dangerous she is. However, its hard to believe that a 17 year old is feared by men like 3 times her age. She was ridiculously over hyped in every aspect. Also, the other biggest aspect I never liked about her was how much of a blatant Mary Sue she was. She was just good at everything and no harm ever really came her way except the final scene where she is drugged and assaulted. She loves books, plays the piano amazingly, is just so beautiful, and is dangerous. Her only fault is her arrogance and pride, but the way its presented in the book, its more a negative personality trait and not a fatal flaw. I need to see that she has a flaw or else she’s just gonna seem unlikable. I’m not saying a person cant be beautiful and really good at something. I know a lot of people in real life who are smart, beautiful, and seemingly good at everything, but they always have a flaw.Overall, I loved the book and the way everything was set up and look forward to buying it on Amazon and reading the rest of the series. If you liked this review, comment, and stay tuned for my review on Crown of Midnight.

[rubyspearsmegamanproject]

5. Land Of The Amazoids

LAND OF THE AMAZOIDS:

The episode begins with Roll cleaning the living room. Dr. Light informs her that Rush made a mess in the kitchen and if she could clean it up as well. Roll gets upset and rants about how she is never given a chance to save anyone in trouble. Dr. Light just stands there not knowing what to say to her. Mega Man corrects her and tell her that she has helped him in the past. Roll still doesn't believe him. Mega Man prepares to go to the Amazon to help plant trees and restore the rainforest. Mega Man and Rush say goodbye to Roll, Roll simply crosses her arms and goes "Hmmph!" He and Rush travel in the Air Raider to South America.

On their way, Mega Man talks to Rush about how Roll doesn't seem to realize that she is actually more than a domestic robot and is very helpful in stopping Dr. Wily.  He reflects on the times she helped him in the past. They are flying over the Amazon when the Air Raider gets shot down by a surprisingly strong arrow. Mega Man escapes the Air Raider on the Rush Jet. Rush also gets shot by an arrow, causing the both of the to crash onto the rainforest floor.

Mega Man wakes up to a female robot wearing leaves with a spear in his face. Mega Man aims his plasma cannon at her, telling her that threatening him with a spear is not a very smart idea. "Try me!" the female robot says to him. While he is distracted aiming at her, another female robot comes up behind him, opens up his back panel, and shuts him down. Mega Man tries to stop her, but she is too quick. They start him up, when Mega Man comes too, he finds himself tied to a wooden post with very strong ropes that he cannot break out of. Mega Man manages to call Dr. Light and tell him that he has been kidnapped and is tied up somewhere in a compound deep in the rainforest. His communication with Dr. Light is turned off by one of the female robots. Mega Man angrily tells the female robots what their problem is. They tell him that he is what their problem is because he is a male robot. He snaps at them do they not know who he is. They tell him that they do not know, but all they know is that he is a male, and that they are to get rid of any males that are in their territory, human or robot.

They introduce themselves as the Amazoids, a race of female robot warriors. Mega Man scans the area and sees that Rush is in a cage, badly damaged from the arrow. Mega Man tells them to at least free his dog, but they refuse to, saying that the dog is a male too, and he will be destroyed along with him. The Amazoids tell Mega Man their origin. They were once airplane stewardess robots on a large luxury jet. The passengers consisted of chauvinist, sexist businessmen. The businessmen treated them horribly, grabbing them inappropriately and calling them degrading names. Then, the airplane had a malfunction and crashed into the Amazon. Most of the businessmen died, but the few surviving businessmen begged the robots to help them, but they refused to. The survivors slowly died of exposure. The robots created a civilization of their own and vowed to keep their new home free from male tyranny of any kind. They renamed themselves the Amazoids. Mega Man tells the Amazoids that not all humans are bad, and gives Dr. Light as an example. But the Amazoids refuse to hear his argument, and tell him that defend male humans and robots all he wants, he and Rush will be destroyed anyway. "You're all making a great big mistake!" Mega Man tells them all.

That night, still tied to the post, Mega Man thinks about all of those times he underestimated Roll. He thinks to himself that he should have given her more chances and let her help him out more. His thinking is suddenly interrupted by someone approaching him. It's Roll. He is almost in tears when he greets her. "You made it!" he tearfully says to her. She tells him that he hopes that he had learned his lesson. He tells her that he sure has. He then asks her how she got here, she tells him not to worry about that for now. As she is freeing him, the Amazoids ambush them. "Where are you going with that horrible male robot!?" One of the Amazoids shouts at them. Roll fights them off with surprising skill. Some of the Amazoids charge at her with improvised spears. Roll uses her axe attatchment to slice their spears in half. The other Amazoids kick at her. She uses some karate kicks to knock them out. The Amazoids with the now sliced in half spears use them like staffs and try to strike Roll. Roll dodges the strikes and uses her spatula attatchment to swat the sticks out of their hands. She then switches to her frying pan attatchment and knocks them all out with a single swing. The Amazoid leader confronts Roll. The leader unsheaths two swords that she carries on her back and charges at Roll. She slashes wildly at Roll. The Amazoid leader manages to cut off Roll's ponytail. This angers Roll. Roll switches back to her axe attatchment and takes a strong swing at the Amazoid leader. Roll manages to damage the leader a bit. The leader takes another swing at Roll, slashing her clothes a little bit. Roll switches to her tongs attatchment, and when the leader swings one of her swords at her again, she grabs one of them with her tongs. She pulls the sword out of her hand and arms herself with it. "Now we're even!" Roll cries out as she wields the sword. Roll swings the sword at the leader. Their swords clash. Mega Man thinks about helping Roll, but sees that she is able to fight off the leader herself. Mega Man yells out to Roll "Don't get too cocky, Roll!" The Amazoid leader is angry that Mega Man is having his say in the battle. The Amazoid leader yells at him, "Shut up, man bot!" Roll yells at the leader "Don't you talk to my brother that way!" The leader replies, "That man bot is your brother!?" Roll snaps back "Yes!" and while looking at Mega Man says "And he's the greatest brother and hero in the whole world!" Mega Man smiles and yells out to Roll "Slice her one for me!"

Roll and the Amazoid leader continue fighting. Roll finally manages to knock the leader's sword out of her hand. Roll prepares to finish off the leader, but a few of the Amazoids grab Roll's arm and stop her. Roll swings the sword back and gets ready to swing it at the Amazoids, when Mega Man stops Roll. The Amazoids are surprised that Mega Man won't let Roll attack them. They ask him why he stopped her, he tells them it's because they've suffered enough. Some of the Amazoids put down their weapons, but then the leader of the Amazoids appears and orders them to destroy the male robot, and goes over to the cage that Rush is in. She threatens to destroy Rush unless Roll lets them destroy Mega Man. Roll refuses to and she and Mega Man go over to the cage to stop the leader from destroying Rush. The leader prepares to swing her swords at Rush. The Amazoids are surprised that Mega Man won't let Roll attack them. They ask him why he stopped her, he tells them it's because they've suffered enough. Some of the Amazoids put down their weapons, but then the leader of the Amazoids appears and orders them to destroy the male robot, and goes over to the cage that Rush is in. She threatens to destroy Rush unless Roll lets them destroy Mega Man. She is stopped by a blast from a laser cannon. Dr. Light had sent a team of rescue robots to save them. Mega Man joins in on the fight alongside Roll. A few of the Amazoids want them to take them out of the rainforest, and tell them that not all of the Amazoids think that about males. The good Amazoids help Mega Man and Roll free Rush from the cage. They manage to escape on the military airship that the rescue robots arrived in and go back home. At Dr. Light's lab, Mega Man and Rush have been completely repaired, with Roll's help of course.