#am i going to do that? im unsure because i dont feel like i have the right to therapy and that all of this ive had coming and im feeling

[kameonerd566]

I am finally done with s2 of Good Omens and

ow

[catboyfurina]

.

[allovertheplace-writing]

Shroom 😭 ilysm <33 thank you, thank you for being my friend!

@nordicbananas (ty for tagging me! i didn't know i was your first friend on here - i'm very much honored <333) @omkookie @azxremoon @astrxealis @meltingblue

i may not have many friends, but i love each and every one of you so so much. you guys have always motived me to keep writing and to keep being here on tumblr. without a doubt, i wouldn't have gotten this far without any of you. So thank you ♡

2023 is coming to an end so this is my annual I love my online friends so fucking much you wouldn't believe me if I told you post.

[arolesbianism]

I need to make a new pmd story right now or I'll explode

[pixiesndberries]

𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄 141 — 𝐃𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐊 𝐈𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄

CONTENTS : calling them while being drunk at 3:00 am.

CHARACTERS : captain price, soap, ghost, and gaz.

WARNING : none just on crack lmaoaoa 😭

AUTHOR'S NOTE : i need to think about this million times, and it took me million times to have a motivation also (i do nsfw..for the one who wanted to request *wink* *wink*) 😇

JOHN PRICE :

— lad is sleeping peacefully after a long rest after a tough mission, his nokia went ringing like hell and literally thought the fire alarm went BRAHHH. Old man was flabbergasted and looks like having an heart attack at 3:00 am.

DAD MODE 100 % he would actually think about it for a moment whether he would pick you up or not because he's unsure what things about to happen. Would be worried for a moment since your friends took over in the phone to help you make him pick you up.

WOULD 100 % NAG AT YOU IN THE CAR. I SAID WHAT I SAID 🗣️‼️ and it made the whole ride like this.

;

"price i think i will puke the cheerios i ate." you laugh with little hiccups while he was driving stressed while wearing his pajamas on. "hey hey, dont ya' fookin' open that damn window!" he says pulling you away while driving with one hand literally jamming in the whole rode as tokyo drift plays in the car radio.

SOAP :

— i feel like he's either the one calling you or he is with you 😭 ok but like let's stick with this scenario with him. He was having a nice sleep of course, and ik he snores like this IM SORRY LMAO and his phone started ringing like hell and he went crazy thinking it was the fire alarm.

he would pretend to act like he hates you for not inviting him to drink with you as he was getting ready to leave to pick you up; he's trying to stay in contact with you because first of all you are heavily drunk and just very very late so it's not THAT safe for you so he tried his best to keep in contact with you until he arrives.

He almost crash the car tbh and he almost hit a deer 😇.

;

"really not invitin' me? i feel offended." he chuckles teasing your drunk ass, "it's not like that!" you whine nudging him thinking he's actually mad at you. "do you hate me?" you asked looking at him like you were about to cry or something, "yes." "fuck you." "nope you're drunk." (the whole ride is just on crack tbh)

GHOST :

— MY MAN IS TRYING TO HAVE A REST ONCE FOR HIS LIFE 😭 (please let this man have a vacay) yet you were there, just as he feels like he's sleeping (ik damn that felt good for him) when suddenly HIS PHONE STARTED TO RING. Bro was ready to pull the trigger, but he took a deep breath; at first he never wanted to answer the phone but when he saw those messages that was typed by your friends saying that you need a ride home because you are heavily drunk. Okay for a moment he think about it he was like, if i pick this motherfucker up is there a benefit? okay what if something happens to them then it's my fault?

WHEN HE PICKED YOU UP HE HAS HIS BALACLAVA ON AND YOU WERE SO DRUNK THAT YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE GETTING KIDNAPPED 😭‼️ and you were like asking for help and shit and he's just there continues to drive wishing he just made a better decision to burn his phone down. seriously.

after like a whole ass minute you finally shut up and just watch him drive silently 😞 and of course he was like "finally."

;

you were watching him drive silently when the car suddenly passed by your favourite fast food chain making you quickly go feral like hell, "I WANT A BITE PLEASE." you say as you keep pulling his shirt trying to make him stop driving, "no." he says as he just continues to drive tiredly, MAN WAS SO DONE. "please mr kidnapper 😭" "lord help me."

GAZ :

— like soap he was sleeping peacefully and snores like mimimimimi 😇💕 when you called and says that you needed a ride home because you were drunk (you tried insisting that you are not THAT drunk 😭) bro was worried so he was like okay sure so he didn't hesitate but to pick you up even though he still felt sleepy. He really cares for you so he really don't mind.

when he picked you up he helped you going inside the car, putting the car seat on a comfortable position; YOU ARE TREATED LIKE A ROYAL 🗣️‼️ You were mumbling and talking about some topics he doesn't know but continues to listen because he knows you are heavily drunk and you barely know what's happening.

HE'S THE TYPE OF GUY YOUR PARENTS WOULD TRUST FR ‼️

;

"-and and this guy came up on me and like hey shawty you need some good dicking there? And i was like fuck you dude!" you continue to babble even though it looks like you were already getting pulled by your sleep making Gaz laugh, "hey that's actually creepy thank god you went away from him." he says calmly as he continues to drive, "yeah yeah- and- and-"

─ REBLOGS, LIKES, AND COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED. FEEL FREE TO REQUEST!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Hello i am unsure about a thing and im not going to go into specifics about the subject as it could be insanely triggering for some, but i will be vaguely describing it.

But recently as in 2023 i lost a friend of mine in a argument where i pointed out something in a anime/manga that just wasnt sitting right with me at all, it was honestly making me quite uncomfortable and then it did some really messed up stuff..and so my first thought is to inform my friend..make sure you know..avoid this..its bad..

And her first move is to attack me and telling me that because i noticed something bad that i was actively participating in that same thing and accused me of being/doing something i was not.

She basically insulted me with something that is no light thing and continued to tell me i was wrong about the subject matter.

I went and found proof that the subject matter is infact what i was claiming it to be and that it was wrong and i was not infact wrong or bad for simply knowing what i was seeing and condemning it.

I continued to try to make her see reason but i got fed up with it and blocked her and left the server i shared with her..alittle while later i unblocked her and tried again cause you know..shes been my friend for years and she was important to me and i was hoping she would apologize to me cause she really did deeply hurt me but all she did was ignore what we argued about, the real issue..so i blocked her again..

So now...now other people are taking notice of this stuff i found in this manga/anime..and just how bad it is...i am thinking of contacting this ex friend again and this time literally demanding an apology cause its undeniable at this point and cause like i said i was deeply hurt by her accusations, when she should have known me better...i honestly feel like i am owed an apology but i dont know if that would make me an asshole or if i should just leave it alone..but i can't forget it..it was literally an insult to who i am..

What are these acronyms?

[xcvlil]

Not yet. Choso x reader Angst

i hope all my little choso lovers love this!!!

TW: Angst, a little bit of gore, death implied, just sadness…i apologize (not really)

muahahhagaga

You stood in the empty train station of Shibuya, holding your side tightly. You ability wasn’t working in time to help patch up the little bit of skin that was holding your insides. You kept thinking, Was this what death felt like?

Infront of you stood a tall pale man, he had a neutral look on his face as he stared at you with no remorse. You couldn’t hold in your need to fall any longer so you collapsed to the ground. Thats when you heard a voice.

“You sorcerers just dont give up do you…”.

You connected the voice to the man who was standing infront of you. As he slowly inched forward you smiled a bit at his comment. “I guess not huh..” You said, ending the sentence in a chuckle. You kept having these flashes of memories. Like your life was flashing before your eyes. You didn’t want to die yet.

“Tell me. Whats your name?” The man asked, crouching down in front of you. His presence felt like he himself was hurt, but he had no opened wounds as far as you could tell.

“F/n L/n…” You said weakly. You didn’t even have the strength to look up at the man infront of you. You didn’t even know all the features of his face. All you knew was, You didn’t want to die yet.

The man lifted your chin, staring at your hurt features. He then pushed your head aside and sighed. ”You aren’t the woman im looking for..” He said, sounding awfully disappointed.

You couldn’t pull out the strength to ask him who he was looking for, but he was leaving. Fear began to build up inside you and your breathing became quick. You didn’t want him to leave. You didn’t want to die yet.

Before you knew it you spatted out, “Wait…Please don’t go…”. The man turned around and raised an eyebrow. He was confused.

“Why shouldn’t i.”

“Because…I dont want to die alone…” You said with a trembling voice. You felt embarrassed and unsure of yourself. Why were you asking a curse to stay by your side. Was it because you were that in need of comfort and company?

Either way, when you looked over the man was sitting next to you. You were in shock, either from the blood loss or from the fact that a curse listened to you.

You felt a painful sensation. A sensation of loss and hurt. You couldn’t tell where it was coming from. You narrowed it down to the man beside you. “You lost someone special to you didn’t you.” You asked the boy, gently looking up.

The man was taken aback by your comment, but yet he still replied “Yes. I lost my brothers.” He said softly. If you judged based off his expressions, you would probably think he didn’t care. But you could feel his emotions. The anger. The sorrow. The need for revenge.

You gave him a gentle pat on the back, “Im sorry for your loss.” You said, you felt remorse for the man.

“Why are you being nice to me, im a curse, what makes you think i need your pity?” He blurted out. The question caught you so off guard that you stumbled from your knees onto your bottom. Why were you treating him nicely? Was it the fact that he could end your life at any moment? No it wasn’t that… It was…

“You don’t seem like a curse… Curses don’t feel sorrow and sadness and empathy.” You said softly. The man slowly looked over at you with a mixture of joy and confusion. He seemed happy to not be called a curse but why was he believing you.

“Oh…” He said quietly. You began to lean backwards a little, your body was slowly giving up on you. He leaned over and helped you slowly lay down.

“I’m not ready to die yet…” you said softly, catching the mans attention.

“Then don’t.” He said sternly.

“I am human, i have bo control on whether its my time or not..”

He seemed bewildered by this new realization. All the other sorcerers could heal themselves…or thats what he thought.

“L/n…Why did you want to become a sorcerer if you didn’t want to die…”

“To help those who couldn’t help themselves..” You said with a slow breath. Your chest was rising and falling heavily. You reached out for the mans hand and he allowed you to take it.

“Thank you…For being here… Stranger..” Your body was fading away. A tear fell from your eye as you felt yourself slipping into the darkness.

“Choso…My name is Choso..”

“Well then choso…I’ll tell your brothers you love them…” you managed to spit out that last sentence before completely going lino and slipping away.

You didn’t want to die yet, but you needed to.

[teddykaczynski]

recently i was discussing sexuality on the land with a new friend and she said that she believed sexuality is more fluid than people think, something to that affect, and i at first wholeheartedly disagreed because that kind of thinking is like, not great for homosexuals historically and in the present day. but she clarified that she meant more in the.... theres more "straight" people that are actually bi way which i do think is true. shes questioning and like, unsure of herself if shes les or bi and somehow this led to me saying how when ive heard some bisexual women talk about their life, they thought they were lesbians for much of it until meeting a man that they were attracted to and in many of these cases, married. and how this feels like a horror story to me, not for them, but like on a personal level. partially because its been told to me that way. like, when i was discussing my reasons for going off T during my first detransition with my old gender therapist i said that i was now beginning to believe i was a lesbian. and she said that she used to think that too but then she met her husband and that maybe thatll happen to me someday!!! which is. not a pleasant thought for me. it is a horror story. one of the biggest reasons i... really dont want that to happen is because it would feel like such a betrayal of my younger self. my 18 year old self who fought and tried so hard to be into penis who felt that that would solve all my problems and make me No Longer Evil and Condemned to the point of a mental breakdown and suicide attempt- if my 26, 38, 50, year old self, somehow fucking met a man i was into, she would have suffered for literally nothing. and i really believe i am a homosexual. but it scares me that i might not be. but, ive discussed this with bi friends who said that the women who realized later in life, probably always had more signs and were just in denial with themselves. for various reasons. i dont think im explaining how she said it right but it was reassuring that U__U ok well thats not my experience. anyway new friend asked if i thought like a woman who had only ever been into women but then met a guy she fell in love was a lesbian but had just found the One Man for her and i said no she was always bisexual and its unlikely that was the one man like i can imagine a woman who was literally only attracted to one man in her life but its not about the specific dude its about that hes male. like suzy could meet mike and like him but if suzy met larry instead... i think im making sense. like i dont believe theres a ssa women out there who only has the potential to be into one specific dude like as the one exception i guess im saying its not an exception theoretically thats the one man she met but hes still a man. anyway.

[lavender-z-love]

Show | Light Yagami

Pairing | Enemies/Lovers?, Teasdere x Kamidere, Friends/lovers?

Genre | Fluff?, Angst?

Warnings | potential spelling errors because I was rushing to finisg this 💀

w/c | 1k w.

A/n | This is short, just trying to kick back into things. I been busy with school and I had a big creativity block. For like a year. Bare with me ♡

You fold your arms, with that smug face..he hated you for it, but he loved that about you.

"So..you want me to play...your girlfriend?" You laugh. Light grits his teeth in annoyance. Can't you just take this seriously?! After all, the both of you are pretty much in the same boat. You knew about the Death Note. You knew Light was Kira. You knew he had the Death note and you chose to aid in this. Though, to see Light himself ASKING for help was new.

"Can you not be childish for one minute" You stand, turning your back to him. Finding the situation funny...I mean THE kira is asking for help. He's got a god complex but so do you.

"Okay Im listening"

"Why not, Im always seen with you. I could use you for the next few days as an alibi"

...You look back at him with those gorgeous dark eyes. "Okay Kira~ I'll play your little game". Light jumps to his feet, covering your mouth. He scolds,"Don't! Say that so loud".

You grab his hand and pull it down,"So when does the show begin?"

"It starts now, I actually need you today. Since you've been to my house before it won't seem random or out of the blue."

Which..is what let to the present. Knowing there were under surveillance why not give them a show. You straddled light pinning him down by interlocking his fingers with yours. Poor thing, he's never been in this situation before. How is he supposed to act? You on top of him with the knowledge of cameras watching the both of you, Ryuk possibly watching you both.

Your finger teasing against Light's lip.. "Light Baby"

He looks up at you, propping himself up on his elbows. "Y-Yes?" He asks, unsure of what you might say. Surely enough, he has an idea you're up to something as you chuckle. "What do you think about Kira–"

You could see his eye twitch in annoyance.."Why..bring him up..Y/n?" You found it hard to hold in your laughter...

"Well, I do find him pretty admirable. I think..he's pretty hot." You say smirking down at Light. Light scoffs,"You say this– in front of your boyfriend?.."

You boop his nose and pout at him. "I should be honest with my boyfriend right?"

His eye twitches. Its clear you're trying to annoy him and hes aware. He flips you over, him his hands rest on both sides of your head. "Wont you..not talk about other men in front of your boyfriend?"

"Oh dont take it personal Light-"

Light cuts you off, "Y/n. Am I, not enough?". He states, looking down at you with sad eyes. Its almost like, he ment it. For the first time, Light manages to make you feel bad. You smile and reach up to brush his hair past his eyes. "Oh Light. You're more than enough." Yet he reminds silent, still looking down at you. "Light, Im– sorry, I should stop messing with you like that."

Light smirks, "Not necessarily, you dont have to stop. I like it...sometimes." He chuckles lightly. You cup his face. "Oh you like it when I mess you all the time. I heard that hesitation. Light scoffs. "Oh..whatever. Maybe."

You both laugh. You both go quiet, glaring at one another not even taking in the slightly suggestive position you're both in...Light cups your face– slowly, gradually getting closer to your face as your hands found their way to his shoulders.

What seemed like the almost perfect moment ruined by dry laughter.

"I thought you guys were just acting?"

Light stopped moving closer to you, realizing what his unearthly companion had said. None the less..maybe you'd forgotten you were currently being watched by Ryuzaki and Mr. Yagami, but it didn't take you long to realize there were more ways to make this scene seem real.

You huffed and sat up. "LIght"

He nods at you with those dreamy eyes, waiting for you to speak. "Let's go out. Wanna do something?"

Light nods. "I'd love to."

Regardless acting or not Ryuzaki would fall for it..right?

...........................................................................

Written on September 22nd, 2024

[rontra]

drop your ffxiv lore

asking me to drop my pants in public would be less embarrassing..... you have to understand crucially that i don't know anything about anything and dont want The Knowers to see me

LMAO well i can talk about it a little but only on One Condition. as i mentioned before im a Certified Stormblood Gamer . in fact according to the wiki i am about this deep (level 64 questing atm)

so basically the condition is this: if something wasn't explicit in ARR or HW you cannot under any circumstances talk to me about it...! if you have any sort of reaction to this post that has to do with any later material than that i ask you Don't say it to me. if you are in doubt about whether something "counts", the safe answer is yes it does, and just going "neat!" instead & moving on will do fine. i really don't want to play spoiler chicken with you and don't want to know anything i don't already know. i'm enjoying taking my time with the game, so please refrain from correcting or corroborating anything i have to say about it atm!!!!!!! i'm still baby! thank you....!!! 😭👍

anyway my xiv characters are 1 a dude who was born in a wet cardboard box all alone and might be scared of women . & 2 a scary woman who did definitely kill her wife but is also the most Wife Guy for like secret reasons. the second one's lore is being ironed out as we speak so its all subject to change but the concept is there

1. ZT

love this guy. i even made an amv about it when i finished arr

(every xiv player voice) my wol is the most special boy in the world.

i actually had a whole thing typed up here about like his fucked up mom and whatever but i got shy and deleted it. i might go over it if someone's actually interested . but basically he's a poor little meow meow who, up until the beginning of the game, was abused pretty consistently bc of [evil cat people family dynamic reasons]. his family members mostly hate his ass and were rarely all that nice to him, so he has a lot of issues with self-worth and things like that--he doesn't feel like he's particularly good at anything or really "worth" much

he's from southern ilsabard which is a place i uh do not know much about. as a stormblood gamer. but it's fine the details don't really matter (walking away quickly)

his most prized childhood possession was the ruined scraps of an old arcanist's tome, and through sheer tenacity he managed to teach himself his first rudimentary spell from the incomplete paragraphs therein. he mostly chalks that feat up to the fruit of Time + Boredom and not talent or love, but those pages were the only thing he took with him when it finally came time for him to follow his older brothers' footsteps and leave the family.

gets on the boat. goes to limsa. enlists in the arcanists guild to cultivate what he sees as the One Single Skill He Has. people in the guild ???praise him??? and encourage him?? to keep at it??? which he is not at ALL used to, but it motivates him to work even harder at his training. he's pretty far from home and deeply unsure of himself, but he absolutely does not want to go back to the limited world he knew until now. so that unwillingness to look back sort of inherently keeps him trucking in search of a new purpose to latch on to

he's very sensitive to people being niceys to him, because he's not used to it at all. he's 4x weak to it and might cry if it's coming from an older woman who is even vaguely maternal, due to his horrific mommy issues. also, he wants to be useful to people ("for once"), so he has a hard time saying no to all the million quests and sidequests in the game. perfect

his inability to say no to people who request his help puts him on the Old Nymian Scholar Investigation Mission of course. i am Scholar Guy for a reason and that reason is ZT. this dude never had anything his family valued, and lived as the expendable runt of the litter his whole life, and now is suddenly entrusted with something important for the first time in his life--something bigger and older than him, a way of life, a legacy to uphold and carry forwards into the future

and that mantle is pretty heavy. but he'll carry it! and that's how he becomes a healer boy who will defend any random tonberry with his life. he feels very strongly about the extinct art of the scholars and also about being a healer in general--boy finally found his calling! also he has the echo and is our funny warrior of light but like that's fine. i'm sure the "not being able to say no to people, no matter how tired/hurt/etc he himself is" thing is not catching up any time soon. i did play DRK up to 60 though and lmao. well. hang in there. i even made an amv ab

there's some more stuff about him like how his path through eorzea and as a healer specifically is in lockstep with death at every turn and also how he's a blue mage on the side and whatever but this is long enough. here's a pic of him with one of my favorite "no one else gives a shit about this character" npcs

he's a pretty kitty and very sweet altho he does need to learn to assert himself (and starts doing so through the course of the game). he's very attached to his friends. he doesn't have any love interest or w/e for now he's figuring his own stuff out. gaining confidence. classic stuff. easy protagonist recipe. my meow meow. i played pvp just to get him a haircut. the things i do for zt

2. KRALJICA

the new baby. kraljica is not her original name, but she's never going to use her original one again. her surname is Radinasch, which used to be Aradina, before she killed her own queen who may or may not have been also her wife (ofc by hrothgar convention she then changed her surname to represent the loss of her queen) (despite being the killer) (it's a memento :) )

she is a bozjan hrothgar so we're back to ilsabard shenanigans (which remains kind of problematic for a stormblood gamer, but It's Fine). she actually knows ZT's mother, but not in a good way. Radina's group was in local political tension with ZT's mom's group, so there's some history there (notably in that kraljica would recognize ZT as "zahsa's runt" (derogatory) and not be very nice to him about it, but they don't really share a Personal history beyond the Faction Squabbles)

back to the point though, kraljica killed her queen, and most of the other followers of said queen were not very happy about that. killing the queen is like really high up on the list of things hrothgar do not want you to do. so she is branded queenkiller and exiled. some of the other hrothgar choose to follow kraljica out (having faith in her leadership for various reasons), making her their new queen as they venture to eorzea together (and all of their surnames become akraljica to match).

kraljica takes the surge of enmity against her as a natural consequence of what she did, and doesn't correct anybody who identifies her as a queenkiller in her journeys. she basically does not care about her shattered reputation or having to leave her home, because she is on, a secret, Other Scheme.

what they don't know of course is that radina asked her to do it. for scheme reasons. #women

kraljica is acting in accordance with radina's will. not even her own loyal followers know what her plan is, but they can clearly tell she has conviction; even when being hated by her people and ousted from her home, kraljica moves with that same inexhaustible willpower

(maybe she has questions, when she's alone, and wonders how much radina kept from her in the final days. and maybe she misses and mourns her. but all of that is only for her, in private, when no one can see... in front of the others, she's unflinching, and a leader they will follow no matter what...!!!)

she doesn't seem to have the echo and isnt a warrior of light. ZT can do that stuff. she's like busy with her own thing. she's running around collecting suspicious amounts of aether and being suspiciously driven and faithful to her cause. suspiciously

ok fine it's because radina asked her to cut her loose from mortality, venerate that, and bring her back as a primal. because she wants to become a war god strong enough to take revenge on the empire. something that will keep coming back, no matter how many times it's destroyed, as long as her chosen can still call for her....<3 that's so romantic

of course, what returns will not be radina-the-person. it will be an image of her will, shaped by kraljica's mind and the bloodpool of radina's aether. radina is dead for good; what kraljica is summoning is a representation of radina's goals and dreams, fueled by pure belief and a lot of aether. That Which Resembles Wife But Is Not will cast one megaflare for every minute of suffering inflicted upon bozja. (speaking to the empire thru a megaphone) this is your final warning

their summoning is pretty unorthodox and and "partial" (the primal does not manifest a corporeal form at this time, but it is certainly present in its vessel to some extent)--the game already allows a few different quirky summonings, so we're just playing calvinball and making up Another Special Case (this time owing to the specific setup and execution of radina's plan, her and kraljica's synchronicity about the whole thing, kraljica's unique position in her life, and some sprinkles of Rule Of Cool to taste) . imo the game is flexible enough about it that putting in Just One More Weird Summon Strat is not gonna break anything (LMAO) so it's fine <3

all you have to do is write in a side character who goes "but! that's not possible..." while the thing is happening in front of them

anyway suffice to say no one is doing it like radina's weird ass, and she couldn't do it without her wife guy who is willing to do whatever she wants. suffice to also say that kraljica's own aether is noticeably Weird and over-aspected by her beloved primal, and that "radina" (that which resembles wife but is not) Could Be lowkey tempering her right now and nobody would even notice it because her goal and the primal's goal are already one and the same. but that's probably fine. radina would never do that to her <3......

unless of course there are things about her even kraljica never understood. but surely that wouldn't happen

its really hard for other people to get a grip on kraljica because she won't let anybody close to her emotionally and she definitely won't spill the beans on radina's secret scheme. her boys are with her no matter what (#hrothgang) (they also picked up a viera whose city name now includes "akraljica" hahaha). other people are just like um that is a shady lady who is casting spells we dont even know how to classify. scary. also she's got a situationship with a nasty bandit milf (my friend's hrothgal<3) so we better just leave her alone. bad vibes all around

radina was a gunbreaker. kraljica is very good at manipulating aether and a strong fighter too, but i havent rly settled on a canon class for her. because her actual "canon class" is like. "a summoner from a hypothetical Other FF game. not even a specific other FF game, just Very Much Not This One" LMAO

she would just be like ah its um secret ancient arts from my homeland . you wouldnt know her. shes from a different continent. not like how they do it in limsa. not at all. goodbye (walks away mid conversation) and the arcanists could not stop her. like

anyway i'm not used to playing a female char so i keep getting distracted by her breasting boobily around. they dont let ZT jiggle like that so how was i to know... and basically, so-called free thinkers when dalmascan draped top 👇

she almost had a different face marking way back in the benchmark character creation era, but looking at it now it looks so weird without her big X . like who is that

(metian vest so important for the shoulder bulk... not gonna lie)

anyway kraljica would hear about the final aeon from ff10 and be like that's fucking right.

[cowboyjen68]

hi jen! i've know im a lesbian since I was 12, but because of my problems with socializing i've never actually had ANY romantic interactions(my lesbianism making things even harder, as you can imagine)

i'm almost out of high school and going to college, so i'm feeling very down about missing out on teen romance but dont want the same thing to happen again. do you have any tips on what i can do to avoid this problem in the future? i am genuinely clueless on what to do when looking for a partner, really

even if you dont actually have any advice to give i still really love your blog, it reminds me that lesbians can actually grow old and live happy lives💖💖thank you for hearing me out and i apologize for any grammar mistake!!

This is pretty easy because, while it was pretty outgoing and friendly, it was often not as my full self. I kept my horse girl, lesbian, butch and weird music and hobby side of myself under wraps from most of my friends. I had no word for lesbian or butch but my high school best friend knew I probably liked girls, we just never discussed it and it didn't bother her. It might have been harder on our friendship had I tried to come out in the 80's, not because it bothered her but the insinuations of all the others about our relationship would have been A LOT for a high schooler.

I waited until after college graduation and I used to sometimes look back and wonder how many times I missed out kissing a girl in high school or other women in college. How had twinges of regret for not having sex or even attempting intimacy with women.( I mostly avoided boys too because ew)

As I was sitting in a miserable passionless marriage to my wife of 17years, I pined for that passion and tingle that i had with my first girlfriend from ages 23 to 30. How many times did I miss that feeling with girls in my high school or college or at summer jobs because I was unsure of myself and not confident that any woman would find me attractive. I was even unsure if loving a woman was something I could do. Was it a real thing?

Looking back now I realize I just was not ready and most of my young friends in high school were not ready for me to be out and opening attracted to the same sex. I had fun in high school, made friends and had a small group of girls I was very close to. I enjoyed those friendships perhaps because I did not come out and cause those bonds to be strained.

In college I was concerned how my parents would react and I was in no way independent from their financial and emotional support. My friends were all around me experimenting with their sexuality and I was watching from outside, really wanting what they had but not willing to give up my security and college education to be open about being a lesbian. I knew I could just "do it and hide it" but I was not built for the stealthy life. I know if i was loving loving women it would be hard to be quiet.

Here is the point I am getting at with the sharing of all these experiences. If you were not ready to act on dating and attempting to date it is probably good that you listened to yourself. We are not on a time line and many young people feel pressured to date when their confidence, sexual maturity and social skills are not ready yet which can lead them to be vulnerable to abusive, controlling or unhealthy relationships. It is hard to listen to your own intuition and set and keep boundaries when you are trying to date just to not be the only one not dating.

What you more likely missed out on was not the thrill of dating but the hassle of pretending you want to date when it didn't feel right, at all.

You are heading to college. You are now becoming interested in the excitement of dating on your own and not because others think you need to date. You are craving the touch, the tingly feeling and the companionship of women. These are all good signs you are ready to date.

My advice:

1.Be honest with yourself and then her (your date) every time. Do not go on date number two if it does not feel right. If you are unsure go on another date but continue to listen to yourself.

2.You deserve passion and mutual excitement to be in the company of a woman. If one of you do not feel it, move on.

3.Do not stick to a relationship because it is "ok" or she is "nice" . You have the right to sexual, emotional and intellectual stimulation. Look for it and don't settle.

4.There will be other women so don't cling to the first one or the one willing to stick around just because she is there. If you don't feel all the afore mentioned excitement, be honest with yourself and her and move on.

5. Dating a woman with whom you share many wonderful moments and lots of joy does not mean you will be together forever or have that expectation. Short term love is a thing and neither of you are failures when that fades out.

6. Ask her. If you see a woman that interests you be clear that you would like to take her on a date and you have romantic interests. Don't be vague or try to use hints. This leads to miscommunications and false expectation every time.

7. Finally, use all the dating and flirting and breakups and heartbreaks and joy and fun and memories to form who and what you are looking for as a partner. All that experience is giving you a better idea on what makes you truly happy.

You missed out on nothing. The adventure is just beginning and it can start with a simple "Hi, I think you are cute. Would you be willing to go on a date with me?" She might say "no", but she MIGHT say "yes".

[mvmnbnv]

Hi, I don’t know if you’ve spoken in depth about your feelings on Vi’s relationship with Caitlyn or what you think of Caitvi, but I know you mentioned you can’t seem to enjoy the ship as much. Although they said Arcane is now canon, we can all assume the general direction of her character will be like in the game. How do you feel about that? Would you be satisfied?

I know for myself I can relate to not being able to enjoy the ship as much. How I consume content around them has kinda been lowkey ruined because of their fans. I definitely think I’m being ridiculous and overly sensitive.

I just dislike how they’ve chosen to speak on the overall characters/plot/storyline especially ones that are quite serious, but then analyze things in the most black and white way. Including Vi’s character where they can’t even try to put herself in her shoes and think about everything she’s experienced, but then just be so…shallow about it. It’s like they’re not seeing her entire character or story. Just her relationship. Her own fans can’t even give her some basic empathy.

I hate how I’m basically letting them ruin the show for me. It’s ridiculous of me to react this way.

hi!

i havent spoken in depth here about caitvi mostly because my content is pretty vi centric. if anything i just mention caitlyn in passing unless i have an analysis on her too. but i really am unsure about how i feel about the ship atm, and its mostly because of what we've already seen but also what we havent seen. and yeah then there's the fandom itself. they speak about vi in pretty shallow ways when it comes to her pain and it just gets frustrating. but its also the choices theyve let us know they made with her and it almost seems like she has no plot outside of caitlyn. during her pitfighter arc caitlyn is all she thinks about. not vander? her mom? Loris (her big enforcer buddy) after they parted ways? hell not powder??? the one who she failed in her mind?? they were planning on putting a cupcake on the back of her jacket? really...? during a time like that? meanwhile one of the writers go on about listening to songs about unrequited love and how they inspired her decisions...like im not a fan. I already know the unrequited stuff is going to be coming from cait's side because of where she is at this point, while vi puts all this time into her, another creator even implying that cait is pretty much home for her now.. the imbalance in this relationship is just icky to me and i feel bad for vi's end of it. especially after having everything ripped from her during her pitfighter arc. for fuck sake i need them to adress this attitude she has toward caitlyn as the character flaw that it is. but the thing is i havent even watched the show so how do i know they dont, yknow? and the way things are set up in their LoL lore, from vi having her own place to them only being speculated to have had something going on by the people around them but not really being confirmed, makes me hopeful for vi. i need her to start putting up boundaries, start having a spine and to not just lean on caitlyn, because we already see it not end well for her. this season is going to stress their power imbalance further and it makes me just hope they go about it in the right way, and that vi isnt just some love sick puppy crawling back to cait after all the shit she's done (enacting martial law, working with ambessa etc) because she's dependent, espeically when one of the writers has been going on about unrequited love...that just feels gross.

in conclusion yeah, its kind of a mix of fandom and what has been presented so far as far as trailers and whatnot. dont feel bad that thats how you feel, it happens lol. but we all will have plenty of time to make our own conclusions when we see the show in its full glory

[arolesbianism]

Oh baby I am getting way to ambitious with my current oni run for someone who's laptop starts screaming anytime it opens steam

[prentissluvr]

i dont have all of my sam thots and dean thoughts just yet but I had to send in this bc I completely forgot about meg! sam

and its a damn shame that we didn't see more of that bc it solidified my stance on being a sam girlie

we got at least 3 episodes of demon dean (i have not seen him yet i've only heard about it) but we got like less than half an hour with meg! sam and honestly we deserved more with him

meg! sam made me feel lots of things LOLL

(i wanted to be jo SO BAD in that episode LMAO)

now i need your thots on him please :p

KJDFSJL NO BECAUSE... NOOO I CANT thinking about the amount of meg!sam edits i've seen in the past few days. thinking about the one saved in my camera roll. thinking about throwing up pissing my pants projectile vomiting and passing the fuck out. i reiterate tho, i'm normal!! i'm so so so normal and i don't feel things about it!!!!!!!

i'm honestly still like borderline unsure about how nsfw i want to get on this blog, but uhhh i'm just gonna start typing and see where my dirty fucking mind takes me!

cw : highly suggestive!! no smut, but still absolutely no minors!! MDNI!! contains condescending/mean/possessed sam, but also sweet sam too <33. use of gendered terms, but it is gender inclusive to fem, masc, and gn as much as i could make it! horrible writing it's genuinely just me going feral :))

sooo basically for me the worst (best) part of meg!sam was his voice! it's so bad (never have i ever heard anything hotter in my life). IDK I DONT EVEN THINK I CAN FORM A COHERENT THOUGHT OVER THIS NOT GONNA LIE. uhm uhhh ummmm uhhhh uhmmmm.

so basically so basically, essentially, wwowowowowowowowifjhshf alright lets focus on one thing at a time.

we'll start with that goddamn voice of his. the way it goes from teasing, condescending to deeper, more gravelly and matter-of-fact and then back to condescending LIKE WHOO IM GONNA NEED TO TAKE A LAP. idk just thinking about his large hand on the back of your head, maybe tangled in your hair if the way you wear it allows for that, and his veiny forearm visible through your peripheral vision as he says "open up.. that's a girl" like he did to jo😭😭😭 (or he's says "thaaat's it" to keep things gender neutral, dragging out the "that's" for an extra second, that extra gravel in his condescending tone).

and while this is in possessed!sam context, he'd definitely say things like that normally, i do personally envision him to be less condescending and more sincere. either way, hot as fuck if you ask me. also this isn't meg!sam, but in season seven he says "good girl" and i do listen to that clip several times a day, i am so serious when i say that and i have no shame about it!! i have daddy issues so i do not care!!! so yeah he also says good girl/boy/whatever variation you enjoy best <3 uhmmm yeah but the main point is his hot as fuck voice, right next to your ear with his breath tickling you sensitive skin. especially with that whisper. oh god the whisper😭 and along with "that's a girl," there's atta girl and he'd use that one too so i'll go die in a hole :))) but yeah he genuinely thinks you're so good for him so expect that praise, whether you want it sweet or mean.

then we also have his facial expressions!! the smirk he uses to rile you up or that he flashes you, all mean and haughty because he knows he's getting to you. the fake pity too!! lord help me, once again the utterly fake pity just falls under that condescending persona that was so hot about meg!sam. i'm just gonna use photo evidence and you can imagine him looking at you like that!! enjoy!

last thing i have to say about meg!sam is manhandling!! ahahaahahahaahahah i'm normal and okay!! (this is a cry for help i need him so bad). um yeah while i hate the context of the manhandling of jo in the episode because it's crossing so many boundaries, i will still enjoy the fact that he is hot. so yeah! have fun thinking about sam whirling you around and pinning you between his chest and nearest surface, hand on your forehead to tilt your chin up and give him full access to the skin of your neck. his other hand is pinning your wrist to whatever surface is behind you, and your own free hand is tangled in his hair and he lays wet, desperate kisses all over your neck and collarbone. that's all hahahahaha :)))) feeling so sane right now!!

[dandelion-skies]

ADHD is weird bc like

“Im going to take away all of your emotional permanence! Your concept of emotions will be the same as that of a baby playing peekaboo”

So you work on it. Because it’s not fun living like that! I quite like the emotional permanence, than you very much. Knowing and remembering how I feel about things is in fact, quite important to me.

BUT I FORGOT THAT TECHNICALLY SPEAKING, ATTRACTION IS A FORM OF EMOTION TOO. Do you know how annoying that is?

Imagine you’re me. Closeted. Spent years trying to figure out what I exactly I am, and after some life events finally figured out their gender. Because gender is permanent, you live with it inside of you.

But sexual and romantic orientation? That’s a force outside of you! Something that only happens through interaction with certain people! Now I figured out years ago I was asexual, and this has been a mostly unwavering piece of knowledge since. But because I don’t have the experience of finding people I barely know physically attractive, I had nothing to remind me of what romance meant to me.

I’m still entirely unsure of how other people experience romance, but I suppose I’m demiromantic. I’ve had crushes before, though few and far between, and only on people I was already close to platonically. And now, with the digital age, I’m not seeing these friends frequently enough to solidify my emotions about them. Yes, talking online is great, if it’s continual and in depth, nothing that I do with any of my in person friends. So I go through the summer, not seeing my friends because they’re back at home now. Away from university, away from me. And I miss them, I know that. The memories with them feel nice!

But by the time summer has finished I’ve created somewhat… false ideas of them in my head. False ideas of myself, too. I think of them as being different to how they actually are. Not bad, just maybe emphasising some of their traits.

And as for me? Spending the summer at home, closeted, my brother calling me gay constantly to poke fun and me having to deny it because the last time I tried coming out it really didn’t go down so well- I almost convince myself that I’m straight! I think to myself, “well, I could probably learn to love a boy. Surely there’s things about it that I wouldn’t find so terrible.” I even choose a boy to try and like. I try and imagine dates, and romance, and even, just for the sake of testing it, naked.

I try and ignore the repulsion I feel as I push the girl I definitely DONT have a crush on to the back of my mind. She and I aren’t compatible anyway. We’re too different! Plus, I feel very strongly that I would like to share things I enjoy, like baking and video games and rollercoasters, and she doesn’t like baking or rollercoasters. It’s an illogical crush, so I should ignore it and choose a logical one.

So, fast forward, and I see both parties in person. The boy, whom I invite over to bake with me, play video games with, and talk about how much we both enjoyed rollercoasters at this particular theme park. My three uncompromisables, if you will.

(I recognise that they’re quite inane things to not compromise on, but they’re important to me!)

This boy is perfect! My family all think we’re going to profess undying love for each other and get married one day, but I say goodbye and I’m left with a nauseating feeling of recognition that there is an expectation with him that there will be romance. Even if not from him, from my family.

On the other hand, I see the girl. And she’s perfect. Every imperfection about her is perfect. Beautiful. I can’t take my eyes off her, and I just know she knows I’m staring. I try and joke about it, fake flirt! Apologise a bit for the fake flirting- but I’m still transfixed. I’m angry that we aren’t alone, that there are other people around us, and I just keep staring and staring and listening to her voice and watching the way she stands. Okay, maybe that sounds a tad bit creepy. And I’m trying not to be! And we shop for some food together, and she buys instant meals. And I ask her if she likes rollercoasters, and she tells me she’s terrified of them. It’s irrational to like her! I know that the relationship probably wouldn’t work out, so it’s not worth pursuing. But by god does it feel so different to boys! It feels electric and real and brilliant and emotional.

But most of all, I’m not left with that numb nausea, the confused pleading with myself after I try and like a boy. And then it’s all followed up by some sort of hyperfixation on my sexuality like I need to know all about it and make it me again before I forget.

Of course, this post is about ADHD and I did derail a bit, but can you really blame me? Consider the subject matter. And I’ll consider my audience too. I write too much.

The tl;dr is, adhd made me forget I was a lesbian. Pretty girl reminded me.

[yameoto]

this is so out of left field but i am having a gay crisis i guess? feel free to ignore but you give wise older sibling vibes don’t ask me why because i dont know so here I just gotta write this down bc i went on my first date ever w a man and he really likes me and thinks im pretty and i feel nothing and he wants to go on a second date and i said yes bc i should give this stuff a go you know but i literally cringe at the thought of like kissing him or doing anything romantic w a man but when i think of doing it with a woman i do not feel cringe or icky im like yeah sounds nice… always knew i liked girls but was unsure about guys and now im just lowkey spiralling bc ive been afraid of the word lesbian forever but now its not hitting me w the gut punch it used to??? i might just need to get drunk and kiss strangers in the clubs but anyways thank you for listening i need to work out how to not hurt this very nice boy who likes me

oh what a lovely descriptor aa thank you! and u sound like you’re in the process of detangling your internal dilemma on your own so kudos to you! n reminder that letting him down easy is totally understandable—suspected lesbian or not. tonnns of people don’t feel it on the second date. it’s usually the certifiable tiebreaker actually! dating should be fun. so it’s well within your realms to just say you don’t feel a spark regardless what you think your sexuality may or may not be. wishing u the best of luck in your romantic ventures anon <3