#am bummed and sad about how some of this season is being handled
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Re the previous ask about blake holding camera = he knew
1. He has his camera in every race. I don’t know if Blake holding it meant anything.
2. He had his parents out in AD22. With SG being closer, his parents would have made it even if it was by flying private. His gf wasn’t there in AD22 either, so not making that comparison
3. Compare his pre-race interview (not even the media day one) during the parade. Complete change from the post race interview. Complete change in demeanour
Combining 2 & 3, if he knew earlier, the earliest could be right before the race. Then why would management do sth like that before the race? (Then again why does rbr do anything atp?) That man knew nothing concrete going into the weekend, just like he predicted nothing amiss before the summer break. That hell video wasn’t for nothing - no one can make me believe otherwise
Alternatively, he himself might have given rbr the ultimatum hoping to force their hand and when they didn’t get back, he finally realised he was done playing this game. He was finally disillusioned. ofc helping max was one part (i genuinely believe that played in his mind when he was asked for the FL) and sticking to mcl was another part, but at the end if the record breaking lap was what he could take away in what he believed was his last moment in the lap, he put his entire ricussy into getting it.
As much as I want to remain delulu, i think (with extreme sadness) this is it for him. Not because it’s over, but HOW it’s over. All because they decided to keep a bum like Checo. I’m ambivalent towards Yuki, but heck I am even angry on his behalf too. Genuinely gutted that rb did DR dirtier than mcl and that’s saying sth, considering all he had done for rbr and how CH and rbr paraded him around as their family member. Will never forgive them. Rbr’s downfall is gonna be something else altogether and you best believe that I will be there to witness and bask in it.
so what you're saying is that clip of helmut going over to daniel just before the race, he was actually inflicting psychological torture on him saying "you better fucking beat that guy or you're out of the sport. good luck! 😉"
no but seriously, i was with you right up until the end bit 😭😭😭 even the idea of giving them some sort of 'red bull or nothing' ultimatum that sent him spiraling i could get on board with. but i don't agree that it's over.
the crazy thing to me is that for as far as it ended up spiraling out, to ME it really just feels like a complex series of misunderstandings and miscalculations (not including the media's part in it cause i think they WERE malicious in their handling of it).
the daniel of it all is the worst part to me because obviously by the end of the weekend he HAD been convinced that it may in fact be the end. i don't believe that that was ever actually the case, but between the confidence in the way the media was reporting it, the lack of clarity from red bull, the trauma and insecurities left from 2022 mclaren and maybe even rbr over this past summer break, and the mental and emotional toll the race itself actually took on him, he was clearly worn down and left in a very vulnerable state where he drew the only real conclusions anyone in his position COULD draw.
meanwhile you have vcarb who apparently didn't know a single fucking thing, so they COULDN'T say anything because there's nothing TO say.
and then you have red bull. now clearly they DO hold some responsibility for the whole thing. they knew what the narratives were going into the weekend, and it should have been easy for them to just clarify that all drivers are going to see out the season, 2025 decision to come later. BUT that being said, i truly do not think they had any clue whatsoever just how big this thing was gonna get. i think they miscalculated in thinking a) it wasn't going to be that big and b) daniel would be able to handle it. he's done it so many times before! why wouldn't he be able to do it again! but then obviously by the time daniel's having his little menty b in the middle of the media pen, it's too late, there's not really anything they can do.
like jenna @accio-ricciardo brought up this idea the other day that it's almost like...have you ever been in a situation where someone in your life accidentally made you cry because they didn't realize you were at the end of your rope emotionally and some tiny little thing they didn't think was even a big deal sets you off and sends you sobbing? it kind of feels like perhaps that was red bull/christian/whoever with daniel. they figured he's a trooper, he'll let it wash off his back like he always does, he can handle it, not realize that he very much COULD NOT handle it because all these different factors were boiling up into the perfect shitstorm to make him absolutely lose his mind.
and if this is the case—it really was just a bunch of misunderstandings and miscalculations compounding and multiplying on each other—i've said it once, i'll say it a million times, i DO think there's a way back and way for things to continue on as they were meant to before all this shit happened. it's just a matter of apologies and reassurances and making things right, and hopefully everyone can set aside their pride enough for that to happen.
#the way that rbr have been so quiet and all these pundits and journalists and commentators#are out here like 'uhhhhhhh......' and slowly starting to walk it back.......very pleasing to the agenda 😈#now i just need red bull to on a little bit of an attack mode when they make whatever announcement they're going to make#like literally go full: YOU 🫵 (the media) caused this whole mess by going so crazy over a rumor that wasn't even true#about a decision that wasn't even made yet!!! go sit in the corner and think about what you did 😤#and then threaten boycott or embargo status or some shit. whatever it takes to get them to back the fuck off a little bit#singapore24#answered#anonymous
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ok i tried but i am so fucking over them trying to make echo like. I don’t even know how to explain what’s happening. I can honestly argue that echo might have more screentime than Clarke so far, possibly anyone out of season 7 yet??? (I may be jumping the gun reacting to these promo pics but anyway) And now we have to watch her grieve Bellamy harder than anyone else in this next ep, and possibly more than his own sister? Because she thinks she’s nothing without him and lost and doesn’t have purpose or something??? Not to mention crying about it with octavia? Who she’s tried to kill multiple times but since been redeemed and forgiven cuz time has gone by? Thanks I don’t want it. I have this weird love hate relationship with her character this season, I was into it!!! I loved the hope echo gabriel thing. and they were going somewhere with her, only for her to lose her shit over Bellamy’s obviously fake out death. And now she’s spiraling. And more or less pulling a Finn. Or something. I’m just tired rn. I need my main characters back. I need Clarke back. Where is she 😩 I don’t even need to bring bob’s absence into this one. I’m annoyed and idk how to feel. Call me salty. I’m just venting and frustrated that for the last season of this show, *some characters are getting a lot more attention when there should be a lot of other shit happening. I’ll probably delete later lmao
#anti becho#bellarke#it makes sense both bob and eliza may have asked for time off#and thats totally okay#i just#am bummed and sad about how some of this season is being handled#i really like a lot of elements theyve added#and i also dislike others at the same time#its just the last season#im sad#if they are doing something right its giving side characters more scenes than before#i just need it to be a lil more spread out man
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Top 10 Favorite Young Justice Characters
10. Jaime Reyes/Blue Beetle
Starting off the list is Blue Beetle. Young Justice introduced me to him, and I was hooked. He’s probably the most mellow and calming voice. His arc and relationship with Bart (friendship or not) were my favorite aspects of S2. They bounced off each other in every scene. I was very disappointed when Jaime and Bart were sidelined so much, and hope S4 changes this (particularly with Bart).
Jaime in the number 10 spot since he doesn’t really have much of a memorable personality. Still love him to bits though.
9. Will Harper/Red Arrow
Funny enough, I did not like Will. He was an asshole in S1; S2 kind of changed my mind about him but not enough since he didn’t appear as much. What really changed my mind was the episode “Private Security” (S3 Ep.4). I started looking back into Will’s storylines and, I have to admit, his is probably one of the best character development.
The first season had him unwillingly living a lie and betraying the people he cared for. In season 2 he was so consumed into finding the original Roy for five years, not even caring or focusing about his own life. I felt really bad for Will because he was probably going through an identity crisis and thought he couldn’t live his life without finding Arsenal. Probably felt guilty.
Seeing him living his own life and being happy with his daughter was so heartwarming. I smiled every time Will appeared in the latest season (totally ignoring the Will x Artemis fiasco), especially with Lian. I’m very proud of him.
I feel bad for putting him so low, yet I adore the next characters more.
8. Garfield Logan/Beast Boy
I have been a massive Beast Boy fan since Teen Titans so you probably can imagine how excited to see him. His origin story was unique and his brother-sister bond with M’gann was very sweet. It was pretty weird seeing how much younger Gar was than Dick, but I got used to it. I was bummed that Gar wasn’t in S2 as much; however, S3 truly made up for it.
After watching Beast Boy being a great leader in S5 of Teen Titans, I wanted a leader-like and more mature version of him. Young Justice truly delivered with Gar being the leader of the Outsiders. It’s nice to see him treated with respect rather than as a joke because that was my biggest gripe with Teen Titans. Though it was weird seeing him not crack a joke at all.
Gar’s story with his mom was heartbreaking to see. I literally cried seeing his reaction to revisiting his trauma in S2 and S3; I just wanted to hug and tell him how awesome he is. My only complaint with Gar in S3 was that the Outsiders weren’t established until near the end of the season.
His voice actor being Greg Cipes also gives him extra points (He’s a chill guy and radiates BB energy).
7. Dick Grayson/Nightwing/ Robin I
Sorry to all the hardcore Nightwing fans.
I love Dick (don’t get any ideas), but he doesn’t get enough development in the spotlight. One of the things I really wanted to see from him is his growth as a main leader, and his journey to becoming Nightwing. I was really bummed when these happened between the first two seasons.
To be honest, I don’t have as much to say about him other than straightforward qualities I enjoy about him.
1.His Voice (it’s so soothing)
2.His Personality (very charismatic)
3.Very Handsome (Probably in the top 3 my most handsome YJ Men list)
I put him higher than the others since he made a lot of contribution to the story and his new words (gotta love that aster!)
6. Megan Morse/M’gann M’orzz/Miss Martian
If I made this list during S1, M’gann would have probably been in my top 3 (maybe even No. 1), but S2 didn’t give her any brownie points.
I really liked S1 Miss Martian because of her kind heart, awkward girl next door personality. Her trouble fitting in the beginning reminded me of when I was going through a time in high school; seeing her having trouble as well helped me feel not so lonely. M’gann powers were (still are) my favorite since I am a big fan of mind-like powers. I would feel so powerful. Watching her identity crisis(?) arc was great too. I’ve had trouble feeling comfortable in my own skin as well as my social anxiety (I’m a mess) and I could understand how scared Megan was of her friends’ thoughts on her true form.
Oh boy. Season 2 basically ruined her. Learning what she would do to enemies was terrifying to see and left me wondering what happened to Miss Martian that made her step this far. What she almost did to Superboy was almost unforgivable. You do not try to manipulate with your boyfriend’s mind when you guys have an argument! Shame on you M’gann. If Superboy hadn’t forgiven you then I wouldn’t have either.
Good thing S3 somewhat redeemed her. Her kind heart was noticeable again and she refused to do that mind trick again (thank god). Very excited for the Superboy and Miss Martian wedding! Please creators, I beg of you to not skip over it. I want to cry my eyes out in happiness!
5. Kaldur’ahm/Aquaman/Aqualad
Now we’re in the top 5 with Aqualad (*ahem* Aquaman) starting it off.
Creating Kaldur was the best decision the creators ever did. I love him with all my heart!
He added diversity to the original team and was a great leader. S1 was not his breakout season, though the second season definitely was.
Kladur played the villain so well that he deserves an automatic Oscar. I never doubted that he was with the heroes, but he didn’t disappoint. My favorite part about Aqualad’s performance was when he rose from the ocean slowly like a cliché villain (he made it work), and the line he said right after he “killed” Artemis; it sent me chills. Love it!
Pretty disappointed that he didn’t appear as much in S3. Very happy that he is a part of the LGBTQ+ community and is in a happy relationship. I’m a part of the community and loved that there was finally some representation in one of my favorite shows. Even so, I have to criticize how rushed and sidelined it was. I hope Kaldur and Wyynde’s relationship gets development.
4. Kon-El/Conner Kent/Superboy
Like Will, I did not like Superboy at first. Mainly angry and volatile characters were never really my cup of tea. I do understand why he was upset and felt bad for him; I just handle anger the direct opposite as him. My love for Conner started growing around the end of S1. He was very sweet towards Miss Martian (bless him for not caring about her appearance) and his anger was in control.
Season 2 pretty much switched my opinions on him and M’gann. It was awful what M’gann almost did to him. That scene with him being so sad that what she did ruined that special bond they had almost made me cry. I wanted to give him a hug. He grew so much too since I don’t think he would have handled the whole M’gann drama as well in S1. A lot of furniture would’ve been broken.
I gotta admit something. I almost put Conner near the bottom (maybe no. 7). A comment in a poll in Amino changed my mind. I wrote a poll asking other fans who did they prefer SB or MM. At that point I said SB, though I didn’t think much of it. Someone (specifically yjfangirl) responded “Superboy has the best development in the show.” This had me thinking about how far SB has gone. In the beginning, Conner was an angry guy who felt alone and rejected by the person who he was meant to emulate. Now he is happier and living for himself rather than to be the next Superman. He’s getting married people! A little detail I noticed when rewatching S3 was Superboy mentioning to new characters that they weren’t obligated to be a hero because of their abilities. I adored this! The main reason why Superboy was created to be Superman if the original ever died, and another one of Luthor’s puppets. But he strayed from that pressuring path and is doing his own thing. Conner doesn’t want other people to feel like he did. What an absolute pure soul.
Also, yjfangirl, first I want to say Hi (*waves*)! Then say thanks for writing that comment. It made me really think about the bigger picture with SB and my love for him as grown exponentially. You probably didn’t mean to do that, but I still want to thank you. 😊
3.Wally West/Kid Flash
We’re in the elites now.
I don’t know how to explain it, I just love Wally. He makes me laugh, and his character growth was great. At first, Wally was this cocky flirt who didn’t take the hero work as seriously. That changed in “Cold-hearted,” one of my favorite episodes in the series. This was when I really started seeing more of Wally than being this dumb flirt. It was great seeing him actually caring about helping people since I believed for a long time that he wanted to be a superhero to just have powers rather than actually protect others. The regret in his eyes when he thought his impulsive behavior killed Perdita helped me see who he really was- this somewhat arrogant speedster who had a kind heart. Episodes that can make me change my perspective on characters are truly special.
I was very upset that he wasn’t in S2 a lot. I understand why since he gave up the life, but I was still bummed. Seeing him being so loving and protective towards Artemis was amazing. Spitfire is my favorite ship and I will not give up on them. All I want is a happy ending! The penultimate episode of S3 was a hint that it will happen. Watching the S2 finale was heartbreaking, I cried watching him disappear, his love for Artemis being the last things he said. Artemis’ reaction did not(I just wanted to hug her).
I have more to say, though I’m leaving it for another post. 😉
2.Bart Allen/Kid Flash II/Impulse
Picking between Bart and Wally for second place was tough. Took me a while to decide; I’ll talk about it later on.
The moment Bart made his appearance, I absolutely adored him. He is amazing and I live for his hyper, fun attitude. His arc and relationship with Jaime were my favorite aspects of S2. What can I say, their chemistry is great to see.
That scene when he was meeting the Flash family was so adorable. His excitement was infectious and spoiling his dad and aunt’s births was hilarious! I watch it occasionally whenever I need a good laugh or reason to smile.
Unlike most time travelers- at least the ones I’ve seen- Bart was very involved with what was going on and befriended his biggest enemy- evil and weirdly huge future Blue Beetle. He was pretty careful about disclosing very important information and took things very seriously. You never know if disclosing everything was the thing that brought the world to chaos.
What I found interesting was his choice on how to interact with everyone. He seemed pretty gloomy in the future, but decided to portray this cheerful, devil-may-care attitude to be more likable. I understood (still kind of do). I had terrible mental health issues and I pretended to be happy in front of loved ones because I thought they wouldn’t care about me anymore. Bart got some brownie points for that.
I was dissatisfied when his role was greatly reduced. I wanted the creators to go further with Bart by revealing his past and how it affected him. He was pretty much comedy relief. You couldn’t imagine how disappointed I was, especially with it involving my second favorite character. Season 4 better change that.
I know that you shouldn’t assume a character’s sexuality, yet I really hope Bart is gay. There needs to be more clear representation and Bart can be one of them. I’m also a Bluepulse and Bartuado shipper (fine with either one as long as Bart’s bond with each of them stays strong).
Anyway, I mentioned that I would explain why I chose Bart for 2nd place over Wally. It mostly stems from wishful thinking. I really want S4 to have Bart as a main character since I believe the future will be strong plot point in the season. Development could surely happen such as Bart opening up more about what he went through. Let all those feelings go.
I’m going to write an article on my hopes for S4 when a release date is announced. Bart and Wally will most definitely be talked about.
…..
We are finally near the end!
And my No. 1 favorite character is…
Drumroll please!
…
..
.
1.Artemis Crock/Tigress/Artemis
That’s right people!
Artemis Crock, original member of the Team and daughter of villains!
She is such an inspiration to anyone who wants to go their own past without their parents’ support.
It’s hard to describe how much I love Artemis. She’s brave, strong-willed, and a kind person. It’s crazy how great of a person she is after all the terrible things that happened to her. I look up to her because I don’t have a healthy relationship with my parents (verbal and mental abuse) and there are times I don’t feel strong enough to stand on my own. I want to carry the amount of strength Artemis has as my own.
After all that happened in S2, it was amazing to see Artemis come back to the team and train the new generation. It must have been hard to walk away from a safe, comfortable life for a chaotic, dangerous life. I admire that in everyone, but I hold more respect for Artemis since “the life” “killed” Wally. I wanted to hug her so bad.
She’s also one of the kindest people in the show, the events in S3 being the best example. When Zatanna was crying about her dad, Artemis was there to comfort her. It was so sweet! Roy and her also took in Halo and Terra like they were a part of the family; the archer treated them like the best big sister. That rainstorm scene was heartwarming to the core.
Wouldn’t Artemis be an amazing mother? Lian and her have a strong bond like a mother and daughter; I loved it, and Lian is in good hands with Roy and Artemis. Though Jade deserves a chance to be a mother. Artemis also seemed to enjoy taking care of those kids in that S1 episode. Wally too. You guys know what I’m guys insinuating. 😉
Get ready for some fanfics on that someday.
My favorite Artemis-centered episode was the second to last episode of S3. I was waiting for this episode centering around Artemis missing Wally and learning to move on. It was great yet heartbreaking. Nothing bad happened. That Will and Artemis kiss never happened. Everyone makes a mistake. No matter how terrible it was.
Anyway, seeing Artemis and Wally living their lives and having a baby gave me life, even if it was fake. It was a vision of the future. I will believe this until there is confirmation that Wally will not come back.
Did anyone else cry when Artemis was so desperate to, but Wally wouldn’t let that happen (the real Wally would do that)? They are a great example of a healthy relationship with all the love and support they have for each other. I want that.
#artemis young justice#artemis crock#wally x artemis#bart allen#impulse#Wally West#kid flash#Superboy#bluepulse#bartuardo#top 10 list#top 10 favorites#top 10#kaldur#kaldur'ahm#aqualad#conner kent#kon el#kaldur x wyynde#miss martian#M'gann M'orzz#megan morse#dick grayson#nightwing#garfield logan#beast boy#young justice outsiders#young justice cartoon#Young Justice#red arrow
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running into adultrio for the first time (x female reader) (3/3)
disclaimer: this is a feels fic CHROLLO The melodic sounds of pop rock from the speakers are louder this evening, over the clink of beer bottles and rowdy conversation. Propping your chin with one arm on the pub counter, you scan the sparse crowd - sure enough, business is slow today. Even the cigarette smoke which usually cling obstinately to the walls feels more distant. As expected of the Halich festivities, where most people in Saherta would be home with their families. For a small establishment like yours, in a town just on the eastern outskirts of the Gordeau desert, this means an early closing day. You are itching to get some rest tonight after handling the merrymakers in the past week leading up to the festive season. It is almost 6pm, you note, your eyes wandering across the pub. There is just a table of three regulars, and a man sitting alone in the far right corner near the windows. He looks slightly out of sorts, dressed in a long purple coat, his black hair combed back but slightly tousled. You can’t see his face properly now, but you recall the unusual cross tattoo on his forehead and the way he came in earlier, silent with the tell-tale shuffle of a worn traveler. You were a bit annoyed that he only asked for a glass of water before taking his seat, not budging an inch. Strangely, he seems preoccupied with the decorations on the wall, in particular the large and fading world map placed amongst photographs and notes from customers. “Sweetheart! The tab please!” You hear a familiar yell that jolts you out of your thoughts. You stride over to the table of the three, late middle-aged men who are already slightly tipsy from all the drinks. “Hope you gentlemen enjoyed,” you hum cheerfully, collecting the cash. As you bend forward to clear the bottles, you feel a hand on your lower back moving down to pat your bum cheekily through your skirt. Internally, you roll your eyes. You immediately brandish the dagger sheathed in your belt and stab it right between the fingers of his other hand resting on the table. You move so fast that no one has the time to react, but you sense the man in the purple coat look up and glance your way. “How many fingers do you want to lose this time, Hanz? Shouldn’t you be getting back to Lina now?” you retort teasingly, used to your regular’s drunk antics. The table breaks out into hearty laughter as Hanz turns sheepish, and they shuffle out of the pub to return to their families for the night. You gather up the empty bottles and bring them to the counter, before turning down the music. Now it is just you, the yellow glow of evening light slanting through the dusty windows, and the strange traveler in the corner. “Hey,” you say as you walk over, wiping your hands on your shirt, “I’m closing up. You don’t need to pay for the water, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” You notice the slightest shift in his eyes to the sheathed dagger around your waist. Then, he looks up and you meet his gaze for the first time. He is extremely good-looking for a traveler, and the light scuff marks around his cheek somehow accentuate his attractiveness. His dark grey eyes are undeniably beautiful, but something about their intensity catches you off guard. His eyes are alluring, almost calculative, but they harbour a flicker of vacant sadness. It’s the latter that stirs something in you, and against your better judgement, you ask, “Do you... need help with anything?” “I am just travelling through the area, but I am looking for a place to stay the night,” he explains pleasantly, smiling slightly. His tone is friendly and warm, you’d dare say even charismatic, but your gut tells you that something is off. You spend a few seconds wondering about sending this dangerous-looking man out into town, rapping on the doors of houses filled with elderly and young children for the holidays... Here, it was just you. You could probably handle him. And it’s been many years since you had company on an occasion like this. You sigh deeply. “If you don’t mind sleeping on a couch, you can stay at my place. It’s just upstairs. Every other home will be packed today.” ---- “Here you go. There’s nothing much,” you say as your swing open the door to your apartment. Thankfully you didn’t make much of a mess, save for some books left open on the sofa. The deepening orange glow of the sunset filters through the glass doors to the balcony, and your apartment appears cosy. The simple furnishings, the small table near the open kitchen, and the few cutlery by the sink only serve as an indicator that you live alone, and coming home to this sight every day always tugs at your heart slightly. You hear the click of the door closing shut behind you, and you wonder why the man hasn’t as much as said a word. You walk to the kitchen counter, intending on offering him a drink, when you register a sudden flash of movement. You feel the dagger in your belt being pulled out swiftly, so quick that the hair on your neck stands on end, so quick that you don’t even have the time to feel shocked, as it is immediately followed by the telling rush of air as the blade swings down above your hea- your instincts kick in, and you turn around rapidly, missing the blade by a few inches, ducking fast before pinning the man to the kitchen table with his arm twisted behind his back. All is silent except for the clattering of the dagger to the floor. “Listen, you piece of shit,” you growl fiercely. “I didn’t bring you up here so you could kill me. Here, you’re my guest, and I am your host. So you better start treating me like one.” You’re not sure why you’re hesitant to finish him off, but you release him. He turns to face you, rubbing his wrists, and in his dark eyes you notice a glint of intrigue. Somehow, he looks impressed. “I apologize for my rudeness,” he says with an amused chuckle, his previous innocent demeanour falling away. From this short interaction you can tell he is incredibly powerful, but you are not going to let it faze you. You pick up the dagger and place it back in your belt, giving him a glare. “The least you can do now is help me with dinner. You haven’t had anything to eat didn’t you?” The man looks at you stunned for a brief second, a puzzled look crossing his face, before he relaxes. “Alright,” he relents, removing his coat and draping it over a chair. You find yourself trying to stifle a laugh as you pan fry some meat, watching the man clumsily washing vegetables at the kitchen sink, his long fingers peeling and prodding the lettuce leaves without much experience. He doesn’t speak much, you realize, but you notice his eyes wander to the meat cleaver on the counter. “Don’t even think about it,” you snap, and you see a smile tug the corner of his lips. Later, you have dinner outside on the balcony, overlooking the glimmering lighted windows of other homes in the town. Beyond it the large rolling sandy hills of the desert. On most days you’d feel a crushing sadness being on this balcony as the past creeps back upon you. But tonight, it feels bearable. Your look to your side at the man eating in silence, looking out to the view occasionally, his eyes glazed with pensiveness and slight discomfort. He catches you looking at him. “The food is not to your liking?” you asked, preparing to be offended. “No, it’s just... this is new to me,” he replies. “What is? Eating?” you snort derisively. “Being taken care of,” he replies so softly you think you must have misheard. Your cheeks feel warm, and you grumble in your own awkwardness as you collect the plates and head back inside. “Earlier on, why did you let me stay?” he asks, following you. You let the water from the tap run over your fingers absentmindedly before falling to rinse the dishes below. “Even after I tried to kill you? Aren’t you afraid not knowing what I could do?” You hear his voice coming closer, now a shade darker. “Who knows...” You turn off the tap, sighing, then turning around. “What more can you possibly d-” He grips your wrists firmly and pushes you against the counter, his knees between your legs pushing them slightly apart, making you lean back to maintain your balance. His face presses close to you, lips almost touching. The suddenness of intimacy sends a shiver up your spine, and for a while, you’re speechless and confused, searching his gaze for answers. “I could take you, like this, right now,” he murmurs, his warmth breath fanning your face, and for a moment you feel your desperate loneliness rush into your chest, lightheaded and heavy with want. You could kiss him now and not care what happens later. You could let him ravish you without a thought, graze your body with his lips and hands in places you’ve long craved for...Then you notice his eyes, lidded, sultry, but beneath it a pained undercurrent of emptiness. The rippling desire in you begins to fade, and you understand. “I’m a killer and a thief. Yet you still help me, and you don’t even know my name.” He whispers, his hands not letting go of yours. “You never asked for mine,” you reply, looking straight into his eyes. You both stay like this for a while, in silence, though it feels like he’s on the brink of saying something more. Then, he pulls away. For the rest of the night, you and him barely talk. He spends some time checking his phone, reading the books you left on the sofa, while you clean the dishes, shower and make some preparations for the pub tomorrow. Every now and then he gets up to help you wiping the dishes, or carry the laundry to the balcony. When it is time for bed, you watch as he removes his shirt swiftly, before lying down on the sofa. “Goodnight,” you say softly, turning into your bedroom. “Goodnight,” he replies, not looking back. The events of the day and the past week catch up to you, and exhausted, you fall asleep almost instantly. You don’t notice when he comes into your room in the early hours of the morning. It is still dark, and his footsteps are quiet so as not to wake you up. You don’t notice as he bends over at your sleeping figure, gazing with fondness. “It’s Chrollo,” he whispers. He leans in closer, and cups his hand around your face. You shift and mumble a little in your sleep. He smiles to himself before placing a kiss on your forehead. He knows you aren’t listening, but says it anyway. “Wait for me.” Then he pulls on his coat and heads out the door, leaving soundlessly into the cold, dark morning as the first slivers of light begin to break across the sky.
#adultrio#adultrio x reader#hisoka morow#illumi zoldyck#chrollo lucilfer#chrollo lucilfer x reader#hisoka morow x reader#illumi zoldyck x reader#hunter x hunter#hxh
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Moving On
Also on AO3. Pairing: Sasuke/Hinata. Summary: Everyone was lying to her. Killing her with kindness. Shielding her from the pain they all know is coming. But now it was time for some hard-hitting truths. And from the most unlikely source. SasuHina.Post-war. Prompt: Day 25: The Season of Grief. Rated: T. Words: 7,566. Status: Complete.
Author note: Angst and Hinata POV as she slowly comes to the realisation that she can’t have the life she’d been planning for. The Season of Grief = The Five Stages of Grief. The grief of losing the love she used to have.
Warnings/tags: One-sided SasuSaku. One-sided NaruHina. Naruto/OC. Angst with denial, pining, and romantic existential crisis. But with a happy ending.
Thank-you so much @sasuhinamonth for hosting this. I'm later than I’d planned, sorry. Hope that’s okay. :)
“There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn't even jump puddles for you.” – Unknown
.
Denial.
.
Life was a series of choices.
For example, Hinata Hyuuga could choose to accept the arranged marriage her father had planned for her, or she could refuse to sign on the dotted line and hold out for love. She chose the latter. She was sure that fourth cousin her father had in mind for her was a nice man, but she wasn’t interested. And after surviving the war and learning to defend herself better emotionally, the last thing she wanted was to regress into the dutiful daughter who never complained. She was finally in control of her own life.
And she was still waiting on Naruto-kun.
Hinata was tired of the sad looks her clansmen would give her when she rebuffed their advances. Centuries of marrying their third or fourth cousins had instilled it too deeply in them that they couldn’t live any other way. Naruto had taught her she could do better, and she was determined to do so.
All of her choices to move forward were the reason Hanabi had been named Clan Heiress. She was already being prepped for it before the war, but their father’s insistence on an arranged marriage was the final straw. Hinata had been officially removed from the running. She would’ve been concerned about being branded with the Branch’s Curse Seal if Naruto hadn’t been so vocal in his disagreement about the practice. The Leaf hero’s words resonated with the village, and Lord Hokage started negotiations to prevent further sealings. Kakashi had also made motions to have those who currently bore the juinjutsu to be released from it. It would take a few more years to fully circumvent it, as the seal hadn’t been designed to be removed, but it was a step forward for the clan. A hope for a better future.
Everything Neji had wanted.
Hinata couldn’t be happier. She only wished to share in that future with Naruto. He was her hero. And the love of her life. She just needed to be more patient with him. But it was frustrating some days. She tried to talk to him and only succeeded when they were alone. Around friends and in crowds, he was so distracted by everyone. One-on-one he became fidgety, but she just chalked that up to him not being very good with girls. He’d stopped asking Sakura out, and the two were nothing more than friends, and he hadn’t asked anyone out. He was just shy.
Hinata already had a plan in place to ask him out herself. She just needed to work up for her own confidence to do so. Someone had to get this relationship going. In the meantime, she daydreamed about how it was going to go. But her days were lonely right now. Waiting. Patiently. And never quite making that important step forward. She had her family and friends and teammates but wanted more.
Her heart could only take so much.
“I just need to be brave.”
Hinata wasn’t brave, emotionally. In dire moments and with important things and people on the line, she knew how to be brave. Adrenaline and determination got her a long way. But in the aftermath, she found herself succumbing to the fear of rejection and crippling shyness.
“Yes, you do.”
She started, realising she’d said that out loud, in front of her sister. She’d been so lost in her thoughts and forgotten where she was for a moment. Hanabi was sitting across from her, the low serving table between them, ignoring the servants as they poured the tea for her before turning to her older sister. Hinata’s sister was clutching a half-finished kimono to her lap and lazily sewing at the hem of it. For such a skilled fighter, her movements were surprisingly delicate.
This was a weekly thing for them. Every Sunday at lunch, when their father was too busy with clan duties to interrupt or overhear them, they would talk to each other about anything or anyone, and when the Hyuuga servants left, even gossip sometimes. Hanabi had been carrying that kimono around all week, taking her time with building on it. Hinata knew her sister well enough to know it was a project with no defined outcome. She was just adding to it at her own leisure. Who knew what it would look like when she was finally done?
Hinata delicately sipped at her tea as Hanabi continued to ignore her own; her eyes narrowing as she focused intensely on the needle and thread. Her sister had developed a habit of people watching, since the war ended. And her insight was far sharper than anyone that Hinata knew. It made her feel insignificant.
“Spoken to Naruto lately?”
Hinata nodded. It was a silent lie. But she could’ve easily ran into him a few days ago if she wanted to so she didn’t see the point in saying otherwise. He was very busy with missions and handling Sasuke. The Uchiha’s release from jail had come as no surprise, given who was Hokage now. Kakashi had always had unwavering faith that he’d return. Just as Naruto did. Sakura… Hinata had seen her waver. But she was more confident now than ever about their team returning as family. Hinata only hoped that when she started dating Naruto herself, that it didn’t upset their dynamic.
“You’re grieving.”
Hinata raised an eyebrow at that. “What am I grieving?”
Her sister smiled. “Love.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Naruto-kun isn’t the smartest person,” Hanabi said. “And I think you know that.”
“He doesn’t have to be.”
Her sister smiled. Again. A knowing smile that Hinata didn’t appreciate. But she said nothing of it and returned to watching Hanabi’s expert hands as she weaved the thread in and out of the kimono. This was a hobby for the younger sister. They’d both learned how to sew traditional garments as well as fix them, when they were still barely able to fight. It was second nature to them both. But Hanabi found a kind of peace to the process that Hinata never could.
“Father wishes you to marry soon.”
“And you?”
Hanabi shook her head. “A few more years, perhaps. When I’m ready to begin training to take over the clan.”
She was still too young to learn everything. Given that Hiashi was nowhere near retiring, it didn’t serve any purpose to put her through those rigorous trials just yet. But Hinata was surprised their father wasn’t thinking about grandchildren yet. At least not from his heiress.
Hanabi put the kimono down and finally sipped at her tea. “How do you feel about Naruto-kun?”
“I love him?”
It was immediate and instinctive, but it sounded more like a question than a statement. Hanabi didn’t react to the questioning tone of her voice. She just gave her older sister a look that told her she was questioning her for more than just curiosity.
“Are you sure, Oneesan?”
She had convinced herself so thoroughly that it was going to happen. Hinata brushed at the hem of the sleeve of her Yukata. Was she? Did she?
Yes.
She still loved Naruto-kun. Of course, she did. She’d gone through too much to just suddenly stop caring about him. He was in her heart. Just like Neji still was.
Was.
“I asked him out.”
“What did he say?”
“He said ‘let’s go to Ichiraku’.” He also said, “that bum Sasuke can pay for mine this time,” but she didn’t see how that was relevant. It was a date. And only two people could go on a date at the same time.
Right?
“Will the rest of Team Kakashi be there?”
Hinata opened her mouth to answer then shut it, her eye twitching in annoyance. She calmed herself and shook her head. “Of course not.”
She didn’t like the way this conversation was going. Hinata glanced at the clock on the wall. They normally took tea, and then lunch, all awhile talking of friends and goals. It was funny to her that they’d never done this until recently. What exactly was the point before now?
Hanabi placed her tea down, almost finished. “We should have the food brought in, before it gets cold.”
Hinata nodded mechanically and waited for the servants to finish setting the table before disappearing. They could not be overheard in this room by anyone who wasn’t already in it. The jutsu that allowed this privacy had been in place since long before either of them were born.
Hanabi started talking about a jutsu that their father wanted to teach them and Hinata calmly dug into her Udon noodles. Silence eventually fell until they were both done. After the servants retrieved the plates, Hanabi went right back to pressing and hemming the edges of the kimono in her hand.
“Sasuke-kun walked by the compound again this morning.”
“Hm?” Hinata sat up straighter at that.
“He’s been doing that a lot lately,” Hanabi mused. “But not last week when you were staying over Sakura’s.”
For Ino’s surprise party sleepover. Which was Sakura’s idea.
Hinata hadn’t slept in her own bed for two nights. It was a first for her, for a long time.
“Sasuke-kun looks in here too. Like he’s searching for something. It’s a barely noticeable glance, but I’ve been staking out the gates.”
“Do you like him?” Hinata was surprised at her sister as well as the strange clenching of her gut.
Hanabi scoffed. “No. But ever since I first saw him watching you training with your team after he got out of prison, I’ve been noticing he does that with you a lot.”
Hinata scoffed. “Don’t be silly.”
“Yeah, you’re right. He’s probably just plotting to kill you.” Hanabi ignored her sister’s worried expression. “Or wondering why you always look so sad these days.”
“I’m not sad.”
“Yes, you are.”
“I’m not.”
Hanabi set the unfinished kimono down and stared her sister straight in the eyes. “Do you love him?”
“Who?” Hinata hated how her voice rose a few octaves.
“Naruto-kun.”
“Yes,” she said. “I love him.”
She would wait for Naruto. For him to come to terms with what had happened and realise they were meant to be together. Hinata would be the quiet voice he can’t block out because he loves her so much. No matter that he had already had numerous occasions to prove it to her. Even someone as clueless as him couldn’t not know how she felt. She just needed to give him a push in the right direction.
That’s what I have to do.
And she went right on back to pretending she didn’t see the pitying look on her sister’s face.
.:.
Anger.
.
The restaurant was noisy by the time Hinata arrived, dressed up and twisting her fingers nervously. She looked up into the colourful lights that decorated the restaurant of choice. Night-time made this place come alive in a way that surprised patrons that saw it for the first time. This was also one of the newer restaurants that opened after the war. So many things had changed, and so fast and it felt like Konoha was quickly becoming a very different village. Kakashi had authorised integral changes and Hinata could see the village one day becoming as large as a city. She was kind of nervous about that. Their population was steadily growing too, even only a year out.
She sighed and stepped forward in the waiting line. Naruto had said he’d come about seven and it was only a few minutes before. Hinata had spent the last hour already dressed for this date. Her stomach had twisted, making her throw up twice, before that. The line moved again, and she found herself at the head of it faster than her nerves could handle.
It’s finally happening.
“May I help you?”
Hinata cleared her throat. “Party for two. Under the name Hinata Hyuuga.”
The server looked through her list and her eyes widened in surprise. “I’m sorry, we were told that was a party of four.”
“A-are you sure?”
The woman turned the clipboard to show her. When Hinata had asked Naruto to make the arrangement, because she’d been called away by her father, she’d assumed he had made it just for the two of them. It was supposed to be a date… right? When the venue was changed from Ichiraku to The Sannin Sushi House she assumed this was finally going to be more intimate.
Hinata swallowed heavily. “I-I, uh. He must’ve made a mistake.”
The server nodded her head in understanding. “Yes, but unfortunately, we can’t change your table. There aren’t any spare ones tonight.”
The sound of the other patrons hit her then, reminding her of how loud and full the restaurant was. She just nodded and Hinata went along with it, hiding her disappointment. They would just have to do with a larger table between them. A voice in the back of her head scoffed at her.
Who else is coming tonight?
Maybe Naruto had misheard her? She didn’t understand how he could have but it had to have been a mistake. She shook her head, chastising herself for worrying over something so trivial. She was stronger than this.
“Thank-you,” she bowed to the server. “Where is the table?”
Hinata followed the woman and settled into the chair that gave her the best view of the restaurant entrance. She was already on edge, with the change in her plans, and worried that something else might sneak up behind her if she wasn’t careful. All the courage she’d learned from Naruto-kun had boiled off and she needed to get a hold of herself.
“Dining alone, again?”
Hinata gave a start at the familiar voice. “Sasuke-kun,” she said softly.
Why is he here?
Did this mean Naruto had invited him too? No, that didn’t make any sense.
The Uchiha slid into the chair across from her. This was one of the non-self-serve restaurants that had popped up in Konoha in the last twelve months and as a result the space between them, under the table, was minimal. His foot accidentally brushed against hers and she started again.
“A-are you here–”
“Hm. Naruto said he’d pay this time if I turned up early.”
They got dinner together a lot, then? Hinata struggled not to lose the soft smile she’d plastered to her face. It was only natural that Naruto would make time for his former teammate who was also his best friend. This didn’t mean he was avoiding her.
Of course not. Why would I even think such a thing?
“W-where is Sakura-san?”
Sasuke picked up the menu in front of him and lazily perused it, not answering her question. He didn’t look over at her when she repeated the question and began tapping the table with the menu absentmindedly. She wondered what was going through his head. After a few minutes, she’d had enough.
“Why are you here?”
Now, he looked up at her. “There are no more free tables.”
Is he making fun of me?
She assumed he was a joking. He had to be. This was supposed to be just her and Naruto. Sasuke was ruining everything. She didn’t want to burst that out at him, but it did really feel like he was getting in the way deliberately. Hanabi’s words to her the other day about Sasuke following her around popped into her head, but that was ridiculous. Everyone knew he was dating Sakura, just like Hinata hoped to begin dating Naruto. Why else would Sakura be so adamant something was going to happen between them?
“He’s just shy, Hinata,” the pinkette had told her yesterday. “And we’re going out tomorrow night anyway.”
Tomorrow night is tonight, she reminded herself. So where is Sakura?
A waitress sidled up to their table, giving Sasuke a once over with her eyes before asking them for their orders.
“Pork Katsu Curry,” Sasuke said. “With a side of Kani Salad and Green Tea.”
“Certainly, handsome.” The waitress turned to Hinata. “And you, sweetie?”
Hinata felt very uncomfortable under the stare they were both giving her. It felt like she was on a date with Sasuke, not Naruto. She didn’t know how to handle this. It felt like the world had just tipped on its axis. When she was this uncomfortable, Hinata usually just caved to whatever was expected of her. But she didn’t want to keep doing that with the important things in her life. However, this was too public and sensitive a venue for her to start putting her foot down without repercussions. Saying anything about her disappointment and desire to get rid of them both would only make her regret it later.
She blinked heavily. Uh, right. They were still looking at her expectantly. Though Sasuke’s eyes were occasionally drifting off to the side like he was embarrassed, but he still looked more bored than anything.
“Miso Soup,” she said finally, going with something she knew well. Hinata wasn’t hungry enough for a side, but she didn’t want them to think she was angry with them. “And M-Moyashi Salad on the side.” She cleared her throat. “And just some water, please.”
The waitress read their orders back to them then winked. “That’ll be ready in a jiffy. You two lovebirds let me know if you need anything else, okay?”
Hinata’s skin flushed crimson and she lowered her gaze to the table, not daring to see Sasuke’s reaction to that.
“How long until Naruto-kun arrives, do you think?”
Sasuke glanced over at her and shrugged, then leaned forward to rest his chin on his hands, now staring at her. It was making her uncomfortable, so she looked back down again. They remained that way, in silence, for a while. Hinata entertained herself by counting the tassels on the edge of the tablecloth. Over and over again.
“You…”
Hinata looked up quickly as Sasuke trailed off, the look on his face suddenly uncertain. Before she could ask him what he was going to say, the waitress returned with their orders. She felt herself turning beet red, realising they’d been sitting like this for at least ten minutes. The waitress was eyeing them curiously, like one would a couple of bugs under a microscope.
“Thank-you,” they both said at the same time.
Hinata sighed deeply as the waitress bowed to them. She was eerily silent this time and moved away quickly.
“I think we unnerve her,” she said softly.
Sasuke glanced at the woman’s retreating back before digging into his food. For him, it was digging in. Hinata had been in many group outings with Team Kakashi since the war ended and Sasuke was allowed free reign of the village. He ate like a nobleman; picky and proper. Not at all like Naruto.
She sighed again and picked up the bowl with her Miso Soup. If he wasn’t going to turn up, she might as well enjoy the night air and good food. They ate in silence and Hinata slowly settled her nerves, finding the quiet between them a comfortable surprise. The loud noises in the restaurant didn’t bother her anymore and she proceeded to escape into her own little world, just thinking about things.
Her father had been asking her about her future lately, instead of telling her what it would entail. She was finally having conversations with him in which taking part meant that she could approach the subject matter honestly. He’d even stopped asking her about her love life. (His attempt at a marriage of convenience notwithstanding.) Hinata put her bowl down and glanced over at Sasuke. It seemed nobody had a handle on their love life lately.
“Are you…” She hesitated when Sasuke put down his spoon and she suddenly had his full attention. “Um. I thought you were coming here with Sakura-san on a date.” He shook his head. “She, uh, said so yesterday.”
Was that a smirk? Whatever it was, it was gone a moment later.
“Sakura…” he cocked his head to the side. “She has different ideas on what an invitation out with friends means.”
Hinata understood what he meant but frowned softly. Everyone knew that Sakura was obsessed with Sasuke and saw any attention from him as evidence of their undying love. A simple invitation with Team Kakashi could set her off on a soliloquy about star-crossed love. But that didn’t explain why she wasn’t here. Her absence made even less sense than Naruto’s.
Sasuke sighed, obviously realising she wanted to know more. He sat back in his chair heavily.
“I… told her we were meeting at Ichiraku’s.”
“You…”
He told Sakura the wrong place on purpose. He had no intention of being honest with her. Was it a trick? Or just him being a douche? Hinata narrowed her eyes at Sasuke. A familiar feeling of annoyance rose up inside her and if she’d been paying attention to why this bothered her so much, she’d have realised Sasuke was giving Sakura the same kind of brush off that Naruto had done to Hinata.
But she couldn’t bring herself to yell at him either. She ground her teeth. “Take it from me, Sasuke-kun, you wouldn’t like someone you care about doing that to you.”
“Don’t call me Sasuke-kun.”
He hated honorifics.
“You have no idea.” He said it like he’d come to some kind of existential realisation.
“About what?”
“You’re quiet and shy and sweet to everyone. Always putting yourself down and picking up everyone else.”
She didn’t know what to say to that. Sasuke continued, now leaning forward and pointing at her like he was her sensei, and she was a naughty genin who refused to listen.
“Despite having such a powerful dojutsu, you don’t even see what’s happening right in front of you. Naruto has obviously left you in the dirt, but you keep holding out hope he’ll come around.” She fidgeted as he continued to reprimand her. “Face it: he lied to you.”
“He was just trying to spare my feelings.” Her voice sounded hollow, even to her.
Sasuke scoffed. “By dragging the decision out.”
“What are you doing to S-Sakura-san?”
“That’s different,” he said, his eyes narrowing. “I’ve told her I’m not interested but she won’t take the hint.”
“Naruto-kun’s–”
“He’s a dobe. And he isn’t going to date you, no matter what you think.”
“How can you call him your friend and speak of him like this? I thought you cared–”
“I never said I cared about him.”
“I suppose you expect me to believe that?”
“I’m not the only one running away from the truth.”
“No, you’re perfect,” she said, spitting out the last word.
He smiled at that. Genuinely. Her frustration seemed to amuse him.
“Why are you saying these things to me?” She asked, clenching her fists and glaring openly at him.
“Because no-one else will,” he said, matter-of-factly. “Least of all the one person who should.”
But why did he have to be so rude about it?
He levelled her with the most intense non-glare stare she’d ever seen from him. “Kindness doesn’t seem to work on you.”
Damn. She’d asked that question out loud. Hinata couldn’t get a handle on the emotions bubbling up inside her. It was too painful. She’s waited for years. Held herself up high and given every inch of herself. But Sasuke knew Naruto better than she did. He said the blond had no intention of doing anything with her. He said that he was just a dobe who wasn’t telling her what she needed to hear. She was so furious now that Hinata couldn’t hear anything other than her own blood rushing in her ears.
How dare he?
“You are a low life.” Hinata could hardly believe the words were out of her mouth as she stood up, her body shaking with anger. Sasuke just stared back at her, not surprised or offended one bit. “Sakura-san could do so much better than you.”
“Tell her that.”
She desperately wanted to throw her untouched water at him. But she reigned in that emotion, not wanting to cause a scene that could get back to her father. She’d already embarrassed herself enough. Instead, Hinata huffed, rifled in her purse and threw down just enough money to only pay for her own food. Naruto had apparently promised to pay for Sasuke, and he wasn’t here to do so. But that didn’t mean that she had to do it in his stead. Feeling quite unlike herself, she scowled at him before storming off.
Hinata didn’t see the genuine curiosity on his face at her actions. The small smile of interest she’d sparked. She could only see red. It would be hours before she could calm down enough to realise, he’d been right.
.:.
Bargaining.
.
If only she’d been stronger. And more forceful, like Sakura, then none of this would’ve happened. Her life had spiralled out of control. Before that dinner with Sasuke, Hinata could just go along and pretend that one day Naruto would ask her out for real, or at least take her asking seriously. He wasn’t in a relationship of his own, though – to her chagrin – his fangirls were still as stubborn as ever. And that lack of a relationship had given her hope.
Now she had all kinds of thoughts about what was really going on. And the truth was, that Sasuke was right. Naruto-kun wasn’t interested in her like that. It was still hard to grasp since she’d held onto it for so long and it didn’t feel real. They’d shared a moment during the war, holding hands and promising to be there for each other. She’d taken it as a declaration of love while he’d been talking about friendship. Granted, the kid of friendship you kill and die for, but friendship all the same.
I’m as bad as Sakura.
Or maybe only almost as bad as Sakura, since the pinkette was still talking Sasuke up to everyone. He’d made a scene the day after that dinner date (and she could admit that, although accidental, it had been a date), which should’ve put Sakura in her place. Hinata hadn’t seen either of them since then, so she didn’t know if it worked. But she had bigger fish to fry.
Hinata needed to regain control of this chaos she’d created. Maybe she was still in denial though, and it would explain why she’d deliberately made her way to Ichiraku’s, knowing he’d be there. He always was at lunchtime. Everyone knew that Naruto got up at nine o’clock, had breakfast (sometimes in his apartment and sometimes at Ichiraku’s), headed over to the training grounds where he’d work out (and sometimes spar, if any of his former teammates were available), then practically skip to Ichiraku’s for lunch. He’d spend anywhere from half an hour to an hour there, depending on how hungry he was and how many fangirls slowed him down. Then Naruto would promptly return to the training grounds for a few hours before tracking down his former teammates to see who wasn’t busy and then bug them until they either kicked him out or he got bored. If the sun hadn’t set yet he’d wander through the village, waving at people, being waved at, and stopping to talk to other Konoha Eleven members.
Sometimes he spent the late afternoon with Konohamaru and his friends. Then he’d go back to the training grounds and use the dark to hone his sensory skills. Naruto would go at it until he dropped, then drag his arse back home, eat, bathe, and finally sleep until morning.
His schedule was a little different sometimes, depending on his mood and available friends (Kakashi didn’t send him on many missions because he was too overpowered for most of them) but the lunchtime and when he started night-time training were like clockwork.
When he would find time to do the things he’d always gone on about, she didn’t know. But Hinata knew his current schedule because she was a stalker. It was obvious to her now. Nobody else followed him around like this. She wondered if he’d ever taken the time to notice. She needed to get a hold of this before she wasted her life away.
But Hinata couldn’t stop wondering what could’ve been if she’d approached Naruto right after the war instead of waiting for him to get into a routine of ignoring her. Maybe she’d have shown him just how right they were for each other. And he’d finally listen.
This was why she was walking toward the Ichiraku Ramen stand. It was why she stopped next to a stall of flowers and pretended to be interested in them as she watched the ramen stand in her peripherals. And why she didn’t move away the moment she realised he was on a date. Her stomach clenched, but it was a milder pain than she expected. Even so, it still threatened to bring a fresh bout of tears to her eyes to watch him with this girl.
Naruto was the only member of Team Kakashi at the stall. He stood outside, laughing and joking with someone that Hinata didn’t recognise. The girl was really pretty. With short auburn hair and a petite figure that her clothes highlighted, and her makeup complimented. What made Hinata realise it was a date was not only how the girl was dressed to the nines (Naruto, too, for him anyway), but also how he reciprocated when she ran her hand along his arm. He was blushing and trying to pull of the cool guy act. If this was just another fangirl, he wouldn’t put that much work into it, surely.
They talked and laughed a few minutes more before clasping hands and ducking under the flap to take their respective stools in Ichiraku.
Definitely a date.
Hinata let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding and turned away from the flowers. The stall server was disappointed but quickly turned to another customer.
Story of my life.
A sudden flare of chakra had her spinning around and she found herself suddenly face to face with Sasuke Uchiha. Had he seen her stalking his friend? There was nothing but his usual aloof stare on his face as he silently appraised her. But she knew. He knew. And the shame of it made her body shake with both anger and humiliation. So, she did the only thing her body was willing to do in that moment.
Hinata ran away.
She took to the rooftops and pushed herself to her limit, trying to get away from Naruto. From Sasuke. Her tears dried on her face by the time she found herself at Team Eight’s old training ground. She wiped at them then found her favourite oak tree and sat down. Even under the shade, the sun was warm and comforting on her skin. She basked in it, closing her eyes.
This time, Hinata felt him arrive. But she didn’t feel childish enough to tell him to go away. She opened her bleary eyes and looked up at him, shielding her eyes from the sun. He looked radiant, with the curve of the blinding light almost silhouetting him. Sasuke moved forward to better block the rays and she lowered her arm.
“Why are you h-here?”
He moved out of the way of the sun and Hinata shaded her eyes quickly. Sasuke always did have a thing for being dramatic. She turned to look at him as he sat down on the grass next to her. He didn’t answer at first, staring up into the sun like it didn’t bother him at all. Nothing ever seemed to bother him. Finally, he sighed.
“I told you so.”
The floodgates opened. She broke down. Hinata couldn’t stop it. She pulled her legs up to her chest and hugged herself, her face in her knees as she cried. She wasn’t upset at him. Only herself. Hinata didn’t react when Sasuke shifted his bum to press his side against her and gave her a one-armed hug. Her head lolled to rest on his shoulder as he pulled her closer to himself, but she didn’t relent on the tears. His hand was large and warm against her, making Hinata cry even more.
Eventually, she stopped shaking and sniffled heavily.
She hated that he could get over their argument so easily and yet she was still plagued with doubts about how she’d acted. How rude he’d been. Hinata gave herself a few silent moments to compose herself before sliding out of his grip and wiping her face. Hinata rose shakily to her feet and gave him a slight bow.
“Thank-you Uchiha-san. I can see myself home now. Good day.”
He watched silently as she walked away solemnly.
.:.
Depression.
.
She avoided every member of Team Kakashi for weeks. Hinata couldn’t avoid Kakashi forever however, as the Hokage called her in for a pep talk – his version, rather, which was to ask her if she wanted a mission outside of Konoha. “To get away for a while. You could treat it like a vacation.”
Did everyone know about her problems? Kakashi probably just knew because of the other members of his former team, but it felt like a spotlight was suddenly shining on her and the whole world had gathered to watch her humiliation. She understood his concern. Hinata would think less of him if he hadn’t been. But she couldn’t deal with being this exposed right now.
“No thank-you, Hokage-sama,” she’d said, bowing lower than usual. “I am expected to join father in a mission soon and it would be disrespectful of me to leave Konoha right now.”
He just stared back at her for a moment but eventually nodded his head slowly.
Naruto’s voice interrupted them, suddenly bouncing off the walls as if he was standing right there and making Hinata jumped. But the loud blond was actually just booming down the hall outside.
“Hang on,” Kakashi said, then stood and disappeared out of the room.
Hinata could hear them talking, and Naruto’s whining voice and something about Ichiraku. Naruto yelled out, “woo-hoo!”.
Lord Hokage is trying to get rid of him for me.
But it sounded like he was too excited to get the hint.
Hinata couldn’t stand the pity. The deep, painful feeling that churned in her gut and worked its way up through her body like acid reflux. Hinata stumbled slightly from the physical shock of it. Kakashi meant well and she understood this, but it just made her feel so small.
She couldn’t let people cover for her anymore. Hinata realised that was what people had been doing. Trying to help her by keeping them apart. But all that had done was blind her to the truth. She loved her friends, but this was not the way to moving on. She had to be braver than this. Steeling herself, Hinata pushed her shoulders back and pushed the doors open, leaving the Hokage's office. Kakashi looked surprised to see her come out. His former student went silent upon seeing her, then started fidgeting.
“Hinata…” Naruto trailed off, rubbing the back of his head.
But Hinata ignored him, her chin high and face resolutely forward. She would not give herself the opening to fall back into the comfort of lies. She would not regress. She was stronger than this, damnit! Nobody said anything else as she left the Hokage Tower. When she was out of sight, Hinata finally breathed, shaking her arms to release the tension. Fighting the tears that threatened to spill over.
“I need to go home,” she said to herself, shivering. A storm was on its way, and she didn’t want to walk home soaking wet. She picked up the pace and quickly entered the front gates of the Hyuuga compound. The rain started pelting down the moment they closed behind her, and she sighed deeply. The guards nodded to her, and she smiled at them with all the warmth she could muster.
The grounds of the Hyuuga compound were beautiful no matter what time of year it was. Even in the moist air they came alive. Hinata walked through the covered walkways between the houses, mulling over what she’d just done.
I ignored Naruto-kun.
She’d never done that before. And she had no idea how to deal with it. A part of her wanted to break down again. The other was feeling light as air. Free. Hinata could feel the emotion building up inside her again so hurried into her room and slid the door closed, before anyone could see her. She carefully placed her sandals on the shoe rack and pulled a coat from her wardrobe. The temperature had plummeted, so she sent out her chakra to get the attention of a servant and had them bring her a hot chocolate. Once she found herself alone, she sat on the window seat of her study and stared out through the glass window at the rain below her, hugging the hot chocolate to herself as she took tentative sips.
She was just daydreaming about figures dancing in the rain when she spotted something.
A figure walking in the rain. It was definitely male, his hands in his pockets and exuding chakra from his body to keep the rain at bay. She could sense it faintly, even from this distance. It reminded her of that mission so long ago when she’d been encased in crystal and would’ve died if she hadn’t expelled chakra from her chakra points. It was an easy thing for a Hyuuga to do, but this person wasn’t a Hyuuga.
They paused and looked up toward her. She couldn’t see his face clearly because of how hard the rain was coming down but Hinata was sure now: it was Sasuke. Hanabi was right. She kept watching as he slowly turned away and continued walking. Had he seen her? Did she want him to? Did it even matter?
Yes. Yes. And emphatic yes.
She had no idea why, but yes. Hinata wanted him to care enough to take the long way home that took him past the Hyuuga gates. He was the only one telling her the things she needed to hear. Even Hanabi’s questions weren’t as blunt as they should be. Sasuke was the only one not pitying her. She found she hated pity. She appreciated him so much in that moment. More than she’d appreciated him before.
Hinata swallowed heavily, palming her hand against the glass windowpane as his figure disappeared into the haze of the heavy rain.
“Sasuke.”
.:.
Acceptance.
.
All she felt now was exhaustion. She had just run a marathon and dragged herself through most of it, but eventually the energy would return. Her body would recover, and her mind would follow suit. She hoped. She had put so much of her energy into the life she’d imagined with Naruto.
Hinata was surprised she hadn’t snapped much earlier. Looking back, it was obvious this wasn’t going to happen.
He hadn’t left her for someone else. Because they’d never been an item. Her heart still wrenched at the thought of what might’ve been, but she was finally taking those steps to let him go. She had no business shoving him into her heart anyway. Hanabi told her, “You’re finally accepting your grief” when she told her and gave her the warmest hug she’d ever received. It almost made her break down again.
Then Hanabi asked her about Sasuke.
“Sasuke-kun?”
He looked up as she approached, seemingly surprised that she’d sought him out this time. Normally it was him hounding her. No, that wasn’t the right word. He didn’t hound her. He wasn’t some obsessed fanboy. She smiled at that. No, Sasuke was a good friend. She swallowed heavily at the weird sensation that sentence had induce in her gut.
Friend.
The word didn’t sound right either.
So, she’d tracked him down, only to find him in the Uchiha compound graveyard. She almost turned around and left right then, to give him privacy, but figured if he could interrupt her when she was doing something important then she could do the same.
“Hinata?”
He didn’t complain as she knelt next to him and offered a prayer to the headstone he was sitting in front of. It had his parents name on it. She closed her eyes and silently wished them well in the afterlife, then opened her eyes and turned to look at him.
“I was looking for you.”
“Obviously. Why?”
She smiled. “Why not?”
He scoffed, but she didn’t lose her smile. He stared back at her before finally relenting and offering up his own light smile. They both turned back to the headstone and silence reigned for a while. It was comfortable and companionable.
“I’m leaving Konoha.”
She was surprised. “Where will you go?”
“I have a mission.”
Hinata frowned. “Lord Hokage is letting you on missions outside the village?”
He pulled a face and she almost giggled. “Kakashi has little choice.”
This told Hinata that the mission was international. She was suddenly burning with curiosity, but held back because, likely, it was top-secret. And she wasn’t in the know on top-secret missions. The inner circle of the Hokage was always a tight, handful of people and this Hokage was no different. She had no doubt that the rest of his former team knew what he was going to be doing.
“It’s just politics,” he offered, sitting back on his bum now and pulling mindlessly at the grass. “Nobody but I can do it, apparently.”
He didn’t look happy about it. Hinata was quite enjoying his openness right now.
“And it’s for an indefinite amount of time.”
She nodded but he wasn’t paying her any mind. It wasn’t personal so she didn’t take it to heart. She wondered how long he’d be gone. If Hinata was honest with herself, she was going to miss him. Before he got involved with her problems, she wouldn’t have really cared either way. But things were different now. Every day since that evening, she’d seen him in the rain, she’d sat at her window and watched him walk by. Every time he stopped and looked up at her, she swore she could feel his eyes on her. Like he knew she was watching him too.
“What’s the mission?”
Why did I just ask that?
She’d held back because it wasn’t her place. Was she really this desperate to know all about him?
Sasuke stood slowly and stared down at her. “Agree to come with me first.”
“What?” She scrambled to her feet.
“Agree to come with me and I’ll tell you all about it.”
He was serious. She frowned. “But Hokage-sama–”
“Kakashi already offered you an out. He won’t complain about you finally taking it.”
“I’m not approved for the mission.”
“You don’t have to be.” He stepped closer to her, and she felt rooted to the spot. His eyes were intense on hers and in the back of her mind she realised she was seeing a side to Sasuke that few ever did. It was intense. The way he looked at her would haunt her dreams if she said no.
She shivered. If I take too long to answer, will he beg?
His comment had a “they don’t have to know” vibe. Like they were runaways. Star-crossed lovers. She felt herself flush at the thought of that. The idea of going with him sounded exciting if not terrifying. But the idea of staying here, not knowing when she would see him again, was worse.
“You can return to Konoha anytime you want,” he added, stepping impossibly closer. “To whatever life you think you will have back here. Or you can come with me, do some good for the village without having to deal with all the shit you’ve been going through.”
Her eyes widened in surprise. His verbal acknowledgement of her problems seemed so out of character for him. But she was grateful and offered a small smile, which he quickly returned, also to her surprise.
Who is this man standing in front of me, asking me to basically run away with him?
It would be a huge undertaking and she had no idea what she was getting herself into. But suddenly, the rush of the unknown wasn’t so scary to her. It would be an adventure. One with purpose. And perhaps, she could find a little of herself out there. With him.
Hinata widened her smile and nodded. “Okay.”
He was full of surprises, because the next thing she knew, Sasuke’s hands were cupping her face. Her mouth opened slightly in shock, and he licked his lips before slowly moving in toward her. He was giving her time to pull away and change her mind. Hinata didn’t take it, closing her eyes as his mouth gently pressed against hers.
She should’ve seen this coming. This was why Sasuke had even bothered to give her the time of day. This was what all their little moments had been leading up to. This odd feeling of belonging was reciprocated.
I am so blind.
The taste of salt mixed in with the taste of him as she deepened the kiss. But for once, they were happy tears.
.:.
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Kara Danvers
My favorite thing about them: Her compassion and the way it touches and changes everyone she comes into contact with for the better. There's something really remarkable about a character who has suffered so much and not only remains hopeful and optimistic but uses that pain as motivation and a tool to make the world and the people around her better. One of the threads of her arc that I was most invested in was her feeling like she had to serve a purpose on Earth, that she had been sent there for a reason and had to live up to the expectations of her parents and almost justify her own survival - especially after she didn't get the chance to raise and protect Kal-El - and slowly coming to understand, through the people who love her, that she doesn't need to be Supergirl to make the world a better place. She does that just by being Kara, and the most important part of Supergirl is her heart, not her powers. (There's a reason "Human For A Day" remains one of my favorite episodes!)
My least favorite thing about them: So this is definitely partly flaws in the writing, but I wish she advocated for herself more in some circumstances and didn't just skim past/bury hurts inflicted on her by people she loves. I was glad to see her snap at Cat in "Red Faced", her laying into Mon-El in "In Search of Lost Time", and finally getting real with Lena in the hundredth episode, but there were some really important things that she really just never addressed - all of the hurt and pain she felt from/towards Alura in season one was handwaved upon their reunion, and the impact of Clark abandoning her was only hinted at by Alex. She and Alex herself had some really serious fault lines stemming back to "Falling" but highlighted upon Jeremiah's return ("You're either a part of this family or you're not," OUCH) and again in the last few episodes with regards to Esme, and I really am bummed we never got to see them truly unpack or even have Kara explicitly address how hurtful and unfair those situations were. I also really was not thrilled with how the handled the aftermath of Lena's actions in season five (and her actions/prejudices going back all the way to season two) and how quickly and unconditionally Kara forgave Lena's truly horrific, personal, and intentionally and unnecessarily malicious actions and attacks. Forgiveness and compassion are core traits for Kara, but in that case I felt they came far too easily and minimized the impact of Lena's "redemption arc" to the point that it was pretty much nonexistent, and the harm she did to Kara specifically was just sort of forgotten. That was a disservice to both characters.
My favorite canon relationship: I was kind of figuring that the series would end with the hint of a developing Kara/William relationship, so SO MUCH FOR THAT, ughhh. I would've been into it, I really liked their dynamic and thought he'd have been good for her. I also like Kara/James - don't totally love how it was handled in season one, specifically the triangle with Lucy and the emotional affair plus James's reaction to Kara's trauma with Red Kryptonite, but I thought they were solid and they certainly deserved much, much better than they got.
My favorite non-canon relationship: I mean, Supercat, obviously. I love their canon mentorship/friendship/partnership, I love the idea of them having an actual romantic relationship, I love pretty much every iteration of their dynamic where they push each other to be better versions of themselves. I'm such a sucker for the grumpy/prickly one (with a soft heart, naturally) + the sunshine one (with deeply-rooted trauma for extra fun) dynamic and they hit every check mark for me. Still riding high on that part of the finale! I also really like Kara/Lucy and am forever sad that Lucy was one of the casualties after the Vancouver move.
The sexuality I headcanon for them: She'd probably be fine with any variation of bi/queer, but I lean towards pansexual.
What I’d do if I could spend the day with them: I'd want to be careful not to take advantage of her so I'd check with her first, but I feel like she'd probably really get joy out of taking people flying, etc., and seeing their reactions and how excited they get. So I'd probably ask her to fly me to her favorite restaurant/eatery anywhere in the world, buy her lunch, spend several hours just chatting because I think she'd be such an interesting person to talk to. Then I think we'd probably find a cozy place to hang out and watch a movie/TV show we both love while eating delicious dessert and having animated conversations about whatever we're watching.
Random fact about them I like: The fact that the resume she gave Cat when she first applied to be her assistant (the executive assistant of one of the most powerful people in the entire world who runs an entire media empire) listed the entirety of her work history as waitressing at Noonan's, a summer internship at a local newspaper in Midvale, and a part time nanny gig. Part of me imagines that Cat hired her partly bc of the sheer audacity of her even applying, lol.
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ML AU: In Another Life: NY Special
(So a few things to note, Since this takes place after the events of this version of the season 3 Finale, there are a few key differences. Fu still being guardian is one of them)
-Gabriel finds himself on the back foot, without a fixed peacock miraculous, he needs something to boost his advantage over the teens. And at the rate Nathalie has been going, he might lose her as well.
-While desperately searching the book, he caught notice of the eagle miraculous, it looked very familiar. (He comes up with his plan to go to New York to get that miraculous), well thats how he realizes his plan that is in canon. But this version is clearly more desperate. He needs to know what it can do and how to use it.
-Marinette’s class kicks but with their sock puppet show and pretty much the set up for how the class is going to America is the same. Including Miss Bustier’s reason for not going.
-Adrien is bummed because there is no way he would be able to go on the trip, not with how strict his father is. Lila tries to cheer him up, saying she couldnt go either (cause in canon reason is the same)
-Marinette states that she will try talking to Adrien’s father, she seems to have a slightly higher opinion of her, its worth a shot. “Afterall, your our sock washington.” She says with a flirty smile.
-Adrien has heart eyes over his cute girlfriend.
-Marinette and company go ready to convince Gabriel to let adrien go.
-Marinette gives a convoluted speech similar to canon, but minus the extra bits of friendship.
-Gabriel complies, saying that she convinced him.
-Marinette is over the moon and immediately texts her boyfriend who is at fencing practice the good news
-Adrien gets his butt kicked by kagami just like in canon.
-Kagami tries cheering him up by saying they could use this time to practice and she can help beat the sad out of him if he wants.
-He checks his phone and is excited. He can go on the trip!
-He tells Kagami the good news, she congratulates him. But comments she will be bored without him here to fence.
_____________________________________________________________________
-Marinette Calls Fu and tells him about her trip to New york, and that her whole class is going.
-”Your entire class?”
-”Yes, even Adrien. Can you believe it? His father never lets him go.” She is over the moon.
-Fu notes to remember that.
-”Well dont worry about Paris. If anything happens, I will be sure to alert you and Chat noir. You will have the horse miraculous on your person.”
-”I am sure Chat noir will be able to handle things here. I will let him know I am leaving. You could use a break.”
-Fu remembers that Ladybug doesnt know that Adrien, her boyfriend, is actually Chat noir.
-”I will tell Chat noir about the departure. You enjoy your trip.”
-”Alright, if you are sure.”
___________________________________________________________________
-Fu decides to meet with chat noir.
-Fu contacts Adrien to meet him at a rooftop.
-”Ladybug wont be in paris?” Chat noir was shocked. (He was so happy to be leaving for the US with his friends and Girlfriend, he actually forgot that Ladybug is marinette and that means she wont be in Paris. And that HE wont be in paris.”
-”Right, and I have a feeling you wont be in Paris either. Your class is having a trip.”
-Adrien doesnt bother asking how he knows that. He assumes Marinette told him.
-”Wait, If Ladybug or I are not in paris...”
-”Dont worry, i will alert you both should anything happen. Ladybug has the horse miraculous on her. If she is close by, she can give you a ride, if not. Your astro form should be able to fly you back to Paris fast enough to get there.”
-Chat noir nods. He cant say he knows she will be close by. But he does know.
-Ladybug doesnt contact Chat noir about the trip, because there is no need to burden him over it.
______________________________________________________________________
-Marinette isnt late, because Adrien had G come pick her up with him.
- So they have some cute handholding as Marinette excitedly talks about going to new york.
-Once they get on the Plane, Marinette and Adrien sit next to each other. So we get Startrain 2.0. With them sleeping on the other, and being cute. No musical plane tickets.
-Alya and Nino are happy for the two of them, commenting that they are still so innocent. But they have no plans on pushing them
-Marinette and Adrien both end up needing to get up and they catch the sunset together. Cue cute almost kiss. But then Techno pirate ruins it.
-The United heroes step in to handle things just like in canon. Marinette and Adrien both internally relieved that they can relax and let other heroes handle things.
-The two enjoy a nice flight to the states
_______________________________________________________________________
-Fu may have called Marianne to help him keep an eye out in the city. She was happy to have an excuse to see fu. It was like a date for them.
-Meanwhile, Marinette and class arrive at the hotel. Aeon comments that Adrien and Marinette are perfect for eachother. Jess doesnt care.
-Chloé isnt depressed as she was in canon, so she isnt dismissive of Sabrina having fun with an american boy. In fact, she decides that she would be more positive. Trying to be the heroine ladybug said she could be. Though... being nice is hard. Alix comments that she looks constipated
-Sabrina is so happy that Chloé is supportive of her. It was a surprise change.
-Chloé was still not thrilled about rooming with Alya and Marinette. But says its fine. Alya is kind of creeped out by Chloé's more ‘Friendly’ attitude. Marinette says that they should still encourage it.
-The class sneaks out to go to the roof party. Marinette and Adrien end up in Aeon and Jess room.
-”Im marinette and this is Adrien.” “Im her boyfriend”
-Aeon is VERY happy to hear that. Jess is indifferent, but helps them both get to the roof.
-The class has fun and Hotdog dan arrives with his magical dogs of hotness.
-Marinette and Adrien have no trouble sharing the hot dog. Alya still a pro wing woman, totally gets Jess to play the song.
-Marinette is 100% down with dancing. Commenting that she remembers that dance.
-Adrien thanking Marinette for convincing his dad, and that she is so amazing. She is practically melting.
-”You’re the perfect girlfriend.”
-Marinette happy giggling and telling him he is such a cute dork.
-Yes there is a kiss under the moonlight.
______________________________________________________________________
-Next day, the class is at the museum. Aeon knows Jess ships it too, cause she admits they are adorable. There is no need for an elaborate plan, so they dont have the class do the thing.
-Gabriel sets his plan into motion.
-Fu see’s robustus and texts Marinette. Allowing her to move. Adrien notices her sudden rush and figures there is trouble.
-Ladybug transforms in private and uses unify with the horse miraculous to make a portal to paris. Chat noir calls out to her. Which surprises her.
-”Wait, why are you in new york?”
-”Its cool, I cleared it with Fu before I left.”
-Ladybug sorta does the same thing she did in startrain and just rolls with it, just commenting how lucky he is that they were both near eachother, and that if he is leaving paris, he should tell her. Chat noir agrees.
-They get to Paris and start fighting Robustus, who they realize shouldnt be here, because Markov is in New york.
-Meanwhile, Technolizer, takes the sword and Sparrow and Uncanny Valley hear the commotion. They dont see Ladybug and Chat noir being independent, so they dont try to strike out on their own, they do the responsible thing and call for back up, Then try to fight him.
-Ladybug and Chat noir are in Paris fighting Robustus, and trying to find his weakness. But after a bit, Robustus just vanishes. Confusing the two. ladybug uses her Lucky charm to fix the damage, and then they get a portal to head back. Ladybug and Chat noir head back. Ladybug is mad suspicious over the sudden monster that seemed like all for nothing.
-Ladybug and Chat noir arrive to see the damage to the museum. Hawkmoth had successfully snatched the Eagle necklace thanks to the distraction from Technolizer. He is able to help the villain escape from the heroes, who were having a tougher time with the beefed up villain (until Majestia got more serious)
-Ladybug telling chat noir that if there is trouble to contact her, and she would do the same. Something is up with Hawkmoth.
-Hawkmoth has the eagle miraculous. He finds out the power of the miraculous is to liberate people. Which doesnt sound as useful to hawkmoth as he would like, but he gets a plan. He reakumatizes Techno Pirate.
-The events left New york damaged, but the heroes were not angry at ladybug and Chat noir since they have NO idea why Techno pirate got an upgrade.
-Marinette and Adrien went to catch up with the class. Where a car arrives for Adrien. Commenting that he clearly made a mistake letting him come.
-Marinette didnt stand by and say nothing (since she wasnt depressed or downtroden) she told Gabriel that she should let him stay. That the heroes would protect him, and that she would be by his side.
-Adrien also sided with Marinette. Gabriel was shocked, and angry that his son would Dare disobey him (which stirs the seeds on why he would use Marinette as a tool for an akuma at a later time). Gabriel gives one more stern command but Adrien is determined to stay. (plus he wasnt bummed about everything either so that helped his confidence)
-Jess and Aeon wanted to go with the heroes to help find technolizer but Civillian Majestia and Knightowl said that they needed them to stay here to protect the tourists. Which made them want to prove themselves.
-Cue the Hawkmoth’s plan using The akuma techno pirate with the eagle miraculous.
-Jess and Aeon notice that things are going wrong. Marinette and Adrien both realize it as well and sneak out to go help.
-Aeon realizes that Chat noir and Ladybug are Adrien and Marinette (because she is tech and is immune to that glamor effect. And is of course is even MORE stoked on them. The four of them meet up and work on the plan thats the same as in canon, (using the door hero’s power)
-The fight pretty much goes the same way as in canon, and Hawkmoth is actually pissed off instead of happy that there are more miraculous. Nathalie is now worse off then before. He is now even More desperate since his plan failed.
-Majestia and Knightowl are proud of their side kicks and Jess/eagle gets to be a hero in her own right. Proving her worth. Uncanny valley is her partner.
-Uncanny valley tells them she knows who they are and that she will clear the memories so that no one will know. Jess gets the eagle miraculous. (Marinette tells Fu about this, Fu says its fine. It isnt from his miraculous box, not his jurisdiction.)
-Marinette and Adrien enjoy the rest of the trip with the class. Marinette commenting to adrien how amazing all these heroes are.
-”I think you are much more amazing Marinette.”
-Cue adrinette cuteness
-Gabriel goes back to america, angry and now so much more desperate then before
#ml#ml au#miraculous ladybug#ml ny special#alt ml ny special#in another life#in another life au#ladynoir#adrinette#adrien agreste#marinette dupain cheng#fu#marianne#majestia#hawkmoth#uncanny valley#eagle
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Yooo, you said in one post that you’ve got Zamfir. Wdym? You got headcanons for her? Fix-it fic or backstory idea? Please post it!
I really enjoyed her character and was bummed out that she was killed so quickly. Seeing anyone say something remotely positive of her makes me happy that it’s not just me. Hope you’re well!
hey anon! i'm working on a post s4 fic where zamfir gets to live and her being traumatized isn't a death sentence for her. the general premise of the fic so far is that we see zamfir a year or so later going about her day to day, reflecting on her mistakes, just trying to be better for herself and her people. i know this isn't the zamfir show but man am i salty that she got the 'batshit crazy and sad' treatment
mini-rant: my motivation to write this fic was that my biggest beef was that zamfir's dying was only used to make sypha angry/hurt for some reason? when sypha could not stand her ass for the majority of the season. but all of a sudden this person whose perspective she only just started to understand is dead and now she wants to wild out. she wasn't emotionally attached to zamfir or targoviste. the exec producers just needed a reason for her to blast off her fireworks and shit. sypha's anger was real hollow and shallow and it irked me soooooo here we are again
i don't have many headcanons/backstory for her rn outside of what happened in canon (she's an insomniac, has ptsd) but a few others are
she works with the de facto leaders (ocs) of targoviste's aboveground settlement to rebuild and restore the city
she's got some...interesting views on the royal family and the church (part of it is just how she was raised/trained but that doesn't make them right)
related to the above, zamfir genuinely wants the best for targoviste, but she thinks restoring the people in power comes before helping the common people which is unfortunate
she hasn't found a good way to handle her nightmares so for the time being she's one of the first to volunteer for nightly patrol for night creatures
instead of a belly wound, ratko left a deep gash in her arm and broke some her ribs
one of her main duties is instructing self defense courses buuuut her injuries don't help
she finds a stray cat who she names spinel and takes on nightly patrols sometimes
but ye that's basically it! once i finish my other fic i'll put more thoughts to paper and maybe post a wip. thanks for the ask anon :D
#i have way more feelings than i thought i would about the vampire show#but here we are#i enjoy the program; i will roast the program#who did this#castlevania#zamfir
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To the lazy Mickey point in your last ask..... idk if I’m off base here but I do wonder if it’s in relation to your point about Mickey not having the temperament for the minimum wage labor force. He’s been very open with the fact that if Ian is insistent that they need money, he can just “go hit the stop and shop on rush.” I wonder if his perceived laziness is more a result of the fact that Ian is very un-interested in Mickey making less than legal money and mick being un-interested in making legal money? Even in past seasons, from my recollection, we haven’t really seen him “hustle” for money the way the Gallaghers do. Instead he always seems to do more infrequent (and potentially dangerous) lucrative scams. I still think they’re playing up “heehee Mickey is a lazy bum conflict!” and it could have been handled in a more insightful way but that’s the show now I guess!
Ok! First glance at this I thought “lazy Mickey point” meant my points about Mickey were lazy and was all “whatever my points about Mickey are, they are not lacking in effort. I am extremely dedicated in my quest to consider all the wheres and whyfores of Mikhailo Milkovich. THIS I promise you.”
But then I realized you meant Slacker Mickey. And yes, this is the thing in season 11 my brain is most ardently resisting. Which is why it struggled with the very concept of Lazy Mickey in your ask. Mickey is not lazy. But Mickey is used to working smarter, not harder. He is definitely a high risk, ok reward sort of person. Whereas Ian still has a military mindset to life: set a goal, work hard, achieve goal. Set new goal. So their approach to these things might have different energies, but I wouldn’t call either of them lazy.
I completely buy into what you’re saying about Mickey having minimal interest in making money legally, but I think that’s mostly because there’s no good way for him to do that. He’s a high school drop out and an ex-con. He has no class advantages or family connections. Ian is in a very similar position. I remember when the stills of Ian at the warehouse came out months ago and we were all VERY sad to see them. Because we know Ian and we know this job is exactly in the vein of the stuff he was doing in season six when he was so sad. We also knew he’d pulled himself out of that last time and he won’t be able to do it the same way this time. But this situation is just as bleak and depressing for Mickey. The difference seems to be that Ian is putting his head down and working hard -- because that’s what Ian DOES. Mickey, however, is refusing to play.
So THAT part completely makes sense to me and is consistent with their characters. They have the same problem. Mickey just has zero interest in going out to the world having his lack of options confirmed for him.
What I don’t get is the suggestion that Mickey is doing that while saying stuff like “I’m on my honeymoon” and wiping jam off on the throw pillows and being surprised that Ian isn't going to pay all their bills together. Letting Ian handle everything doesn’t seem terribly consistent to me. Also: Mickey and hygiene. Writers -- is he someone who wipes jam on pillows AND someone who meticulously removes all pubes from his soap at the same time? I suppose this is possible. We all contain multitudes.
Here’s the thing. It’s possible (though I don’t know that I will call it likely) that at some point in this arc Mickey will speak to his frustration about not knowing how to pivot from someone who Got Things Done in the crime world, to someone being paid nothing to take shit from a boss about, like, collecting unreturned carts at a grocery store. That the idea of making money in any meaningful way in the real world feels soul destroying, because Mickey is SMART and we know he can run an operation -- but no one is going to pay Mickey to do that.
Unless he goes to work for himself. Which is where I hope we’re going to go with this.
I think the part that bums me out about that particular storyline so far is not so much that Mickey doesn’t want to do what Ian is doing -- but that they’re playing something laden with no small amount of pathos as an Isn’t Mickey A Stinker story -- at least in parts of the episode. I don’t think it’s going to stay there, because of several weeks of BTS photos that suggest otherwise, but I don’t know that we’ll exit it with Mickey getting to talk about the very valid reasons he might have for sitting this whole thing out while Ian gets charge for having a body that needs to be attended to at the warehouse.
But I can hope! And there’s time for that. And in the meantime, I did enjoy the show giving him a story where he solved the financial problem in an afternoon, acknowledging that Mickey is smart and can get things done. Because he can.
Thank you for the ask! I’ve loved answering these.
#legitimately love getting these#two in one day#Merry Christmas to ME#Gallavich#asks#shameless season 11#shameless spoilers#sorta
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Sometime the best present is presence.
Hey y’all. Happy holidays guys, this is my participation in @toomanystoriessolittletime Christmas story challenge. I am not a super happy happy joy joy kind of a holiday person, so I hope maybe some of my fellow “I can’t handle forced holiday cheer” people can relate to this a little bit.
The prompt is with Henry Cavill and last Christmas by Wham.
Pairing: Henry Cavill x OFC Ellie
Word count: 2600
Content warning, language, adult situation, the least smutty smut I could manage, talks of infertility treatment, pregnancy, depression, I’m sorry if I missed anything.
Picture found on google
There were two things that Henry knew for certain to expect from his lover once the Holiday season rolled around, the first was that he knew that their shared kitchen would almost always smell like sage and cinnamon, and that her depression would take a nose dive. This was going to be their fourth Christmas together and he was prepared. Every year since she moved over to the UK to be with him, Christmas Eve, they would go out and grab a pizza, come back to the house, and spend the evening watching Christmas movies in new pajamas. Henry would keep the hot cocoa flowing and the snacks supplied. Christmas morning, Ellie would make the most amazing breakfast, things from his childhood and hers, the three of them (including Kal) would open presents and the afternoon would be spent in Middle Earth with take out for dinner. Boxing Day was spent with his mom and dad. The break would be carefully planned for as few social obligations as possible.
Life was running full tilt in its normal chaos, Henry was filming for the next few weeks and Ellie went back to working on her novel. One of the techs on set told him about a game that he and his friends were planning on playing this holiday season. Henry looked up from his phone and asked about the rules. It seems simple enough. The game will be just enough of a distraction to keep her mind off the doctor’s appointment pending that he knew she was concerned about. And maybe his mum would come up for a couple of days to help keep her occupied. The matriarch was nothing, if not considerate of his partners mental health.
When he came home that night, the smell of her cooking hits him like a ton of bricks. The warm earthy scents of caramelizing onions, roasting garlic and he knows some kind of bird… it wouldn’t be duck. Is it Cornish game hens? But there are definitely potatoes involved as well. He swears that he can get some kind of hint of apple pie.
“Baby, I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” He asks as he comes into the warm kitchen. Out from the oven, she pulls out Brussel sprouts with thick batons of pork belly, seasoned with roasted garlic, and another serving dish of crispy potatoes was sitting on the counter. On the stove top, was a concoction of apples and onions, browning together in butter and fennel. On the table, making Kal ignore Henry all together, was a beautifully roasted chicken, spatchcocked on her favorite wooden cutting board, the skin was a deep golden brown. Had anyone else made that array of of food, he would have thought they were crazy, however he had thought that Ellie had the Force or something like it when it came to cooking. She could pull a bizarre array of foodstuffs together and create a hero’s feast. She had managed to turn instant noodles into a meal fit for a king before his eyes in their early dating months. Amazing meals were her super power.
Her face lit up as he walked into the kitchen. “Well, it was a good brain day.”
“I’m glad, my darling,” Dinner was set a few minutes later. Sitting together at the table, they dug into their feast.
“I will never understand how you can get the skin so crisp, but this meat is so juicy. What kind of witchcraft is this?” He asks after half the chicken has been picked clean by him alone. “And you have absolutely ruined me for other peoples sprouts, you know that right?”
Ellie leaned back in her chair, smiling like the cat who caught the canary. “I’m glad you like that, it was the last of my smoked pork belly though. Some time in January, I want to make some more again. Maybe cure my own bacon again.”
“That sounds like a good idea.” Knowing that if she was planning on smoking other meats that he could probably talk her into smoking some ribs for him. “So speaking of good ideas. I want to challenge you to a game.”
“A game, you say? What kind of game?” She raised her eyebrow in curiosity.
“A survival game, the best kind of survival game in fact, because we can challenge our friends to it and this will go on in perpetuity.”
“Go on.” Looking at him like he’s going mad, but loving watching him get animated like this.
“It is called, wait for it… Whamagedon.” He says with the biggest smile.
“Whamagedon?”
“Yes, Whamagedon. Do you remember Rick Rolling? It is like that, but with the song “Last Christmas,” by Wham.”
“What are the rules?”
“I want to set a group text up, me, you, my brothers, fuck it we can even add Ben to it. Maybe even your sister. When we go out and about, the idea is if we hear the song we are out of the game. And the best part is after you are out of the game it is called Whamhalla and we can try to sabotage the others. And it can only be the Wham version.”
“It would get us in and out of the stores faster, probably.”
“I view that as a bonus.” He said leaning back, satiated by dinner and the idea he had been brewing all evening. “What do you say?”
“Sounds good to me, but we can not sabotage each other.”
“Absolutely not. Although I might make an Instagram post if I’m out of the game before Christmas Eve.”
“You are a chaotic goblin, you know that right?”
He just nods, his face is lit up like a child in on a secret. “Now what do you say if we go run ourselves a nice hot bath before bed. I feel like this cold is seeping into my old man bones.”
***
It was the beginning of December when Henry came home from the grocery store that afternoon, he heard the sobbing as soon as he dropped off the bags in kitchen. He rushed through the house to find her in the bathtub, Ellie was cradling her head in her hands. Kal whined, nudging her with his cold wet nose and slowly wagged his tail as she whispered, “I know bud, I love you too. Mommy is just sad today baby, it’s okay.”
Kal looked at his daddy in the doorway, he looked like he was trying to say ‘Dad, fix her.’ Ellie soon looked up too. The face he adored more than any others was puffy from crying. “I’m sorry hun, I didn’t want you to see me like this.”
“Elle, what happened?” he asked, sitting down on the floor next to her. Henry smiled a little at her, he planted kisses on the back of the hand that he held.
Ellie tilted her head down, and the tears started again. She said it so quietly that he almost didn’t hear her. “Miranda just found out she’s pregnant.”
“Your friend from back home?” Without looking at him, she nodded once. “Do you know how long they were trying?”
“They weren’t. She called me this morning and told me the news. She’s so happy, its all she’s ever wanted. And I really am so happy for her.” Her voice cracked again. Henry rubbed her back as she struggled to take a deep breath. “About two minutes after she hung up I started cramping like I’m about to start my period. I… I feel like I’m failing you. My body is failing you. I even do the fucking thing that I was made to be able to do.”
She started to sob, curling herself into a ball, and wrapped her arms around her knees. His heart ached for the woman he loved.
“My darling, my sweetling, you have not failed me. Your body has not failed me.” He lifted himself up off the floor, “I’m going to go put the things that need to stay cold away, and I will be right back.”
Moments later he was back and stripping off his clothes from the day. Elle gazed upon him in love and awe. “Get that water nice and hot again, I’m coming in.”
She started draining the currently tepid bathwater right away. Henry handed her cold bottle of her favorite beer, and had one for himself. She then stayed in the middle of the tub as he climbed in behind her. He dropped a lavender, chamomile and vanilla scented bath bomb between her legs as he settled in. She leaned back against his body, as her ran his fingers against her soft skin.
“What if I can’t give you a baby, Hen?”
“We could steal one. We will find a mummy with more kids than she can keep track of, and I’ll drive the car by really slow and we will lure one of them in with the promise of sweeties and puppies.” He teased her. The resulting giggle was worth the dark humor occasionally.
“I’m being serious, ya dick.” Her laugh was always magical to him. She took a long swing of her beer.
“Who said I wasn’t being serious. Would I love to have a mess of children, yes. However, I love you more than whatever hypothetical situation I’ve had before we met. You make me so incredibly happy.”
“Even on the bad days like this...”
“Yes, even on the bad days. Are you worried about going back to the clinic?” He kissed the back of her head. This would be the fourth round of IUI treatments. The shuddering breath she let out let Henry know he was correct. “We don’t have to do it again if you don’t want to.”
“If we are not successful this next time, I think I want to take a break from trying. At least for a while. I need to do something to help myself. I don’t think I can handle it on my own.”
“Okay, my love. We will get you the help you need.”
“I hope so. But in the mean time, I want to just spend the night being bummed out. Is that okay?”
Henry lathered up her wash cloth with her favorite smelling soap, getting the silk smooth suds down her back, tracing her shoulders and down her chest. “Does that mean we are having Chinese for dinner?”
“You know me so well.” She sighed, resting her head on him as he ran his hands up and down her body. She had stopped shaking but the tears still ran down her face. She nuzzled her face into his neck so he decided to rest his cheek on her head. He lovingly washed her body and while the water was still steaming she rolled over to face him. Straddled on his hips, she ran her hands over his body, leaning into giving him hungry kisses.
The love he poured into her was always returned to him. His body asked hers to show him how much she needed him, the tears on her cheeks this time were from pleasure as she came. He followed her into bliss shortly after.
“I need more of you,” he whispered between kisses. They drained the tub, and dried each other off with soft fluffy towels. He picked her up from her hips and carried her to the bed, placing her down on their bed. If the first session was strengthening their connection, this time was carnal pleasure. Throaty I love yous whispered to one another, sealed with passionate kisses.
Afterwards, still a tangle of legs and sheets, they placed an order for their favorite take out. The two cocooned themselves from the world until their dinner arrived. Ellie, although absentmindedly pushed her food around with her chopsticks, seemed alright for now.
My love, please don’t go where I can’t follow. He thought. Please, don’t push us all away while you suffer by yourself again.
***
Since the beginning of December, his plan worked. She would tease him about close calls. They would go in and out of stores as quickly as they could. The group chat they had going would go off sporadically and half the family was out within the first week. When he wasn’t working, he noticed that Ellie was sleeping more than normal, but he didn’t want to say anything to her. She sometimes wouldn’t text him back for hours if she took a nap in the middle of the day. Her publisher however seemed happy with the revisions they were making towards the high fantasy novel. Her second book would be published that coming spring. His mom had come up and visited, helping Ellie get some of the house ready for them to go back to Jersey until after the new year. They ran errands together, she helped Ellie with her annual purge for donations around the house, and generally just tried to keep her busy.
Their last day in London was also their appointment with the fertility doctor. Getting all set up in the exam room, Henry held her hand. A nurse came in to take a blood sample and made small talk. Very faintly in the back they could here Christmas music coming from the reception area. Henry could already tell that the next half an hour was going to drag, and Ellie’s hands were starting to shake harder from the anticipation. It was maybe ten minutes in when suddenly his lover groans in disgust.
“Well fuck...” She mutters. And then the lyrics of some of the music starts registering to him.
With a note saying, "I love you, " I meant it Now, I know what a fool I've been But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart But the very next day you gave it away This year, to save me from tears I'll give it to someone special
“oh, of fucking course it plays now.” He chuckles at her. Henry starts to giggle a little bit. Seeing him lose composure, Ellie starts to as well. The giggle morphs into laugh then into hysterics. The two of them were cackling like hyenas when the nurse popped by in, wiping tears from their eyes and he knows one of them snorted.
“The doctor is running a little late, she wants you to get into this paper gown, she’s going to have to do a pelvic exam.” The nurse tells them quickly, dropping the items off, clearly not impressed by the two of them.
“I don’t I have had an exam for one of these before.” Ellie thinks out loud still laughing. She undressed quickly, throws on the gown and sits on the exam table. “We needed that laugh, though. I feel a little better.”
“Oh yeah, this has been stressful.” he nodded.
The doctor came in and did her formal greetings. “So I have a sinking suspicion but I want to take a look at you first.”
Henry politely averts his eyes while the doctor performs the exam, until she started talking again. “Well it looks like we aren’t going to be giving you the injection to stimulate your ovaries today, Ellie. The blood test showed that you are pregnant, I want to feel your uterus and yeah, you have a fetus in there. You are about three weeks pregnant. Congrats guys, you beat the odds.”
Ellie and Henry sat in the exam room in shocked silence until the doctor left.
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Hi would you like some rage about She-Ra season 5?
If the answer is no, please don’t click below. For real. Really for real. I’m not looking to piss in anyone’s Cheerios. I think if you were satisfied (or better!) with the show, that’s fantastic and I envy you. As I have always said, love what you love. My opinion is mine and means precisely nothing beyond that. If you think you may be even a little bummed reading about how someone didn’t like it, skip this post and go on with your day, I promise you’re not missing anything worthwhile.
IN A SIMILAR VEIN: If -- before, during, or after reading -- you feel inclined to argue with me, I am begging you to please not. I cannot begin to tell you how much I don’t want to be argued with on this right now. I’m still extremely disappointed and cranky, and I’m not much in the mood to have a measured, reasoned debate about my feelings. Much as my opinion has no bearing on you, your opinion has no bearing on me, and as I’m giving you the option to opt out, I’d appreciate the same courtesy. If you want to write your own post on your own blog, go nuts! Just please leave me out of it. I PREFER TO BE CRANKY AT TELEVISION SHOWS THAN PEOPLE.
The rest of you, come on down. I don’t promise coherency, but I DO promise a lot of stuff said in all-caps!
---
Hello! Thank you for joining me! We watched the remaining few episodes of She-Ra last night! I hated them! Yaaay!
What did I hate? OH HO HO MANY THINGS FRIENDS MANY THINGS. It’s not just stuff from the final couple of episodes either, I want to clarify. It’s the entire final season, settling on last few episodes like the freshly fallen snow on your front lawn that some frat boys decide to pee their names into. By the time we’d gotten to these last episodes, there was really nothing left for me but confirmation of all the shit I’d come to hate. SO THANKS I GUESS FOR PROVING ME RIGHT
Which isn’t to say there was nothing to enjoy in the final episodes! There was!
5. She-Ra’s Triceps. GET BUFF GIRL. I LOVE how Adora and She-Ra look similar, but very much not identical. Adora’s no slouch when it comes to physical stuff, but they go the extra mile to show us how She-Ra is that much more. HOW RARELY DO YOU GET TO SEE A WOMAN WITH MUSCLES. I’ve been nothing but impressed by the ways the show drew the line between Adora and She-Ra, and however I felt about its handling of other elements, it didn’t let me down here.
4. Sometimes A Family Is A Twink, A Lizard, And Their Imp Baby. I don’t have further commentary on this, and I need none.
3. Welcome Home, Daddy. THIS WAS SO SPECTACULAR. Glimmer had, I would argue, the most realized arc in the story. It was so gratifying to see this as a culmination, not just of her own struggle with her magical power and ability to harness it, but her willingness to do what needs doing, however personally difficult. That was a stumbling point Angelica could never overcome, continually trying to micromanage and protect Glimmer rather than trusting her and recognizing her for the asset she was. Also though, more succinctly: YESSSS BITCH
2. A Shanty! THIS WHOLE SCENE WAS PERFECT NO NOTES. Just the right blend of silly and sincere, a genuine delight as even brainwashed Mermista had had enough of Sea Hawk’s shit, AND so much more clever than it seemed at first glance. THIS IS THE ONLY VALID HETEROSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP IN SHE-RA I AM NOT TAKING QUESTIONS AT THIS TIME
1. Shadow Weaver. SHADOW FUCKING WEAVER. What a complicated, fascinating character, bar none the most interesting in the entire series. I do think they pulled their punch right at the very end with her, but I AM capable of remembering I’m watching a kid’s show, so I can only get so disappointed about it. Mostly, she remained a beautifully morally complex character, and she was one of my greatest personal delights from beginning to end*.
(*) Boy did this show have one single solution for mommy issues though.
THAT WAS ABOUT IT. So let’s get to why we’re all really here, and that is MY SCREAMING OH MY GOD WHERE DO I BEGIN
Nah, I know exactly where to begin.
GLIMMER AND BO JESUS MCTRISKET I AM GOING TO EXPLODE AND SHOWER THE UNIVERSE IN THE SHRAPNEL OF MY HATE
WHY IS THIS HAPPENING
WHERE DID IT COME FROM
HOW CAN I SHOVE IT BACK IN THE HATEFUL SPEWHOLE THAT SIRED THIS BULLSHIT
WHY WHY IS THIS HERE WHY IS THIS IN MY FACE WHERE MY EYES HAVE TO SEE IT FUCK ME SIDEWAYS THIS IS THE MOST UNNECESSARY SHOEHORNED IN HET ROMANCE FUCK A DOODLE NONSENSE I HAVE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE TO BEAR WITNESS WHAT IS IT DOING IN THIS OTHERWISE EXPONENTIALLY GAY CARTOON
WERE YOU PANDERING TO THE STRAIGHTS
WHY ARE YOU PANDERING TO THE STRAIGHTS I ASSURE YOU WE ARE COVERED BOTH HISTORICALLY AND FICTIONALLY
ALSO NEED I REMIND YOU THAT YOU HAVE ALREADY ACHIEVED HETEROSEXUAL PERFECTION
NO MERMISTA NO WE ARE NOT ALL JUST LIKE OKAY WITH THIS
Oh my FUCKSTICKS, I could’ve rolled with so much more that angers/disappoints me about She-Ra’s ending if every single thing I feared about this hadn’t proved true.
AND. IT. WAS. SO. UNNECESSARY.
What exactly did pairing off Glimmer and Bo do for the story? For their characters? THIS IS THE PART THAT’S STABBING ME IN THE DELICATE WEBBING OF MY TOES. Because -- COME WITH ME A MOMENT SWEET ANGELS -- because I was under the impression that, oohhhh, I dunno, FRIENDSHIP WAS A HUGE FUCKING IMPORTANT PART OF THIS PASTEL HELLSCAPE
Is it, She-Ra? IS IT REALLY???? When not one but BOTH of your childhood friendship pairings end in romance? When you close out your five seasons with romantic relationships so painfully and specifically sown across the character landscape like an overzealous gardener turned loose on the world?
You know what you have at the end? DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID
THIS ISN’T A BEST FRIENDS SQUAD IT’S A DOUBLE DATE THAT NEVER MERCIFULLY ENDS
And again I ask, Why?? What was it about Glimmer and Bo’s relationship that needed them to become romantic? What was LACKING that this was the solution?
THIS IS WHAT MAKES ME LOSE MY GODDAMN SHITTING MIND I AM SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS INSIPID MYOPIC TRASHBAG OF A CONCEPT
I believed She-Ra’s entire premise about friendship, I believed it wholeheartedly, and I’m so PISSED that at the close of day, narratively, it swept it all the bin. AND YES, YES IT DID, otherwise, WHY IS IT THERE. It serves no story-based need, it serves no character-based need, it has no NEED at all. So is it meant to be a “reward” to Bo and Glimmer for winning the war, as if their lifelong friendship were not reward enough? Is it meant to show they’ve walked through the flames and emerged with stronger, deeper bonds, because of course a relationship can only go SO deep without fucking. There’s no avenue to Romantic Relationship that doesn’t simultaneously point to something lacking in Platonic Relationship, AND I AM FURY PERSONIFIED
I am so tired of this. I’m SO TIRED of this.
And it didn’t need to be there. They didn’t even TRY to give us a good reason. That may be the part that makes me the angriest. Of COURSE they hook up romantically, of COURSE their platonic love would grow into “more”.
Fuck YOU, She-Ra. I thought you were better than that. YOU WERE SO CLOSE TO BETTER THAN THAT
THEN THERE WAS CATRA
I get it, I guess. I mean, I think it’s shittily written, but I GUESS. Honestly, end of day, I just don’t care about Catra enough to really get too angry about it, particularly when as I’m so fucking incendiary over something much more important to me. But it’s also the show’s greatest creative failure, and even if I HADN’T gotten angrier at other choices, it would’ve still cut its own legs out from under it.
Catra’s “redemption” was weak and sad and did a disservice to her and everyone involved. She started self-centered and shitty, and she ended just as self-centered and shitty, only we’re fine with that now. She learned nothing and changed nothing, but also nobody ever demanded it of her, so I can only lay so much at the character’s feet. The problem is ultimately creative, where I think Noelle Stevenson got lost in her own love of the character, and somewhere along the way forgot that if you take them out that far, you have to be willing to walk them the long road back. Compare to poor Glimmer, for fuck’s sake, whose greatest sin was being desperate enough to be manipulated by the character whose entire fucking DEAL is being THE manipulator. How much shit did she get for that? How long was she punished? Meanwhile Catra becomes THE Big Bad for a while, nearly unravels all of reality in a fit of supreme lesbian angst and self-pity, directly leads to the death of the planet’s ruling monarch who also happens to be GLITTER’S MUM and DIRECT FRIEND TO THE SHOW’S HEROES, but that’s fine, you did one sorta good thing one time and even though it was also wrapped in a thick film of self-pity and a final fuck-you at Adora, all is forgiven!
Speaking of, Adora suffers just as much from stunted growth. From the beginning, her thing was control, unable to free herself from the responsibility of everything and everyone. What did we have at the end? Adora as the only one who could save everything and everyone. Yeah, they kept asking what it was SHE wanted, BUT THEN SHE NEVER ACTUALLY GOT TO CHOOSE. NOT activating the failsafe wasn’t an option for her, and while she wound up not having to die to do it, even that wasn’t her choice in the end, it was Catra’s. (Don’t even get me started on her nth hour “You love me?” fuckery when it wasn’t once for one single second shown to be a question of such life-turning importance.)
All of which could be interesting! That Catra and Adora went through all this, came so far to wind up right where they started? AWESOME. LOVE IT. FUND IT. But really all that happens is nobody minds now that Catra’s a self-involved little shit and tee-hee another Best Friends Squad Mission being bullrushed by Adora within five minutes of ending the last one isn’t that funny?
I can’t even dig much enjoyment out of Adora and Catra as a trope subversion (if one of them was a male, their romantic involvement wouldn’t have even been a QUESTION), because the show lost its fucking mind with romantically pairing everybody off in the final five minutes. WHICH BRINGS ME RIGHT BACK TO MY PREVIOUS SCREAMING SO I’LL STOP THERE.
There was other stuff, of course. I think it was a TERRIBLE decision to spend the last season with the focus split between the two groups of rebels, and writing half the cast into brainwashing. I think the Nettossa and Spinnerella stuff was wasted and lacked any punch at all because the show for some reason or another couldn’t be bothered to let us spend any time with them to care. The waste of Scorpia and Mermista especially (to people named Jet Wolf who are me) was fucking CRIMINAL. Speaking of Scorpia, wouldn’t her showdown with Bo have been so much more poignant if they’d had really any kind of interaction before that moment to build from? (Sure, it’s Scorpia, so if you’re going to sell the lack of context with anyone it’s her, BUT ALSO.) Hey, remember Huntara? No? NEITHER DID THE SHOW.
All my details aside though, MY MANY MANY MANY DETAILS, what kills/rages me most about She-Ra was how so much potential from the first four seasons was just flushed away. Whether it was the creative team shooting itself in the foot or corporate pressure and rushing from Netflix, I don’t know. I don’t CARE. This is the show I was given, so this is the show I have, and that kind of fall after that kind of potential doesn’t just irritate me, it makes me SAD. I wouldn’t be this disappointed if I didn’t think it could have been -- WAS -- so much more.
Time will tell if I can separate out the final season from how much I loved those that came before it. I like to hope so, because I did love it intensely and loved whenever I got the chance to really dig in and talk about it.
WHATEVER ELSE I SUPPOSE I WILL ALWAYS HAVE THIS
Again please remember that I am not at present looking to argue or debate my feelings and opinions. I get to just be angry and disappointed, as a treat!
#jet wolf watches she ra#a novel by jet wolf#ANYWAY THAT'S ENOUGH ENERGY SPENT ON THIS CHILD'S CARTOON FOR ONE 24 HOUR PERIOD
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For some reason, despite not having watched the show in roughly seven years according to when I last wrote thoughts about it, I decided last week to start listening to a podcast about Buffy the Vampire Slayer because October. The podcast turned out to be amazing, and despite being thoroughly disillusioned with Joss and worried that would change how I see the show too much, I started watching along with the podcast. Well, really I’m playing catch-up. I just started the Reptile Boy podcast episode, and I just finished The Pack in actually watching. My perception has changed, but mostly in a more mature/woke direction, I’m seeing more problematic stuff and wanting to deconstruct it, but it’s not hampering my love of the characters. I am trying to use death of the author to try to deconstruct and watsonianly explain things, but sometimes it’s better to just go “the writers fucked up” or “yup, that’s a weird and creepy Joss fetish” and let the characters off the hook and be a Doylist.
Here are the thoughts I’ve had so far, which as you can see cheerfully spanned the entire range of the show, because season one doesn’t give me personally a lot to work with.
-Xander is borderline Nice Guy in season one, and I don’t like it. I am enjoying deconstructing him and figuring him out more than I ever did before, though, despite an uneasy feeling that doylistically it started from Joss’ idea of how a average dorky teenage boy would act when surrounded by awesome girls and then reasons for it were added later. It’s really genuinely interesting that Xander’s the heart of the team and has all the feelings about everybody and wears his heart on his sleeve, crushing a lot because of that leaving him vulnerable in addition to hormones, and that growing up in an abusive and neglectful household led to insecurity and overcompensation and poor coping skills. And it’s a really fascinating idea that he despises vampires because he lost one of his best friends to them, and can’t handle the idea of any being capable of redemption or good behavior because he semi-accidentally staked Jesse while trying that concept out and if they can be redeemable then he can’t forgive himself, but of course the show didn’t want to talk about Jesse and preferred to heavily imply if not outright say that Xander’s feelings about vampires were mostly about jealousy over Buffy, which is the most Nice Guy angle they could have possibly chosen. (I... can’t say I totally mind, as Jesse’s behavior was objectively worse than s1 Xander, but still I think it would have been better to not ignore his impact on Xander.) I’m glad Xander more or less gets over his crush after season one and doesn’t wade any further into Nice Guy territory, if I recall correctly, and I’m not claiming it’s unreasonable for him to have had it in the first place, it’s just so much of his behavior regarding it is so uncomfortable, and it could have been handled loads better.
-weirdly, The Pack is the first episode of season one that I found I still thoroughly liked. I did enjoy the show deconstructing/dealing with some of the Xander problems by cranking them up to eleven, and part of it is that I am a sucker for werewolf and werewolf-like stories, and also a sucker for supernatural things happening to the Normal Harmless People in media, but I honestly think a big part of it is how little the episode uses terrible s1 special effects to play the story out. It’s all in the acting, and there was some really convincing and good acting going on.
-I discovered that the last time I watched seven years ago, I concluded that despite his general attitude, Angel genuinely likes being around fun and lighthearted people. I want to bask in that concept for a moment before I turn it around to an earlier point, and say that if Xander wasn’t constantly openly hostile to Angel, they could very well be bros, and I am bummed the show never tried. I mean, jealousy or not, Xander’s vampire issues should still be a problem. But I like the idea of Angel just silently enjoying Xander’s dumb jokes and his naivety, and logically Angel would also super appreciate Xander being adamant about killing him when he’s gone evil. In fact, even if they never became bro’s in canon, I’m going to declare it headcanon that Angel quite liked Xander as a person, and just did not take kindly to constant jabs at his nature. Although, honestly, Angel probably would be a little jealous of Xander regardless for being the most emphatically human person around, (especially considering what a disaster Angel was when he was Liam? He wouldn’t see Xander and think “what a foolish child”, he’d think “is this what I could have been if I was alive now? if I had a couple good people in my life to protect me and help me grow into a better person?”), and wouldn’t really enjoy Xander constantly reminding him that Xander is human and Angel is not. So here’s the revised headcanon: Angel likes Xander as a person, and would quietly consider him a friend if Xander wasn’t openly hostile to him. Angel does not super enjoy spending time with Xander since it means constant needling and reminders that Xander has what Angel never got, but he does appreciate that Xander never lets his guard down and by extension reminds Angel not to let his guard down, either. I will have to see if that holds up as I rewatch; I am still mired in season 1 and I haven’t gotten up to them even sharing a scene yet.
-I have been thinking a little about the escalation of Willow’s heartbrokenness over the course of the series, and… I know there’s a good topic there but it just makes me sad to think about.
-on willow: I think she’s bi and the show/joss is just bi-phobic. Watsonianly, she just never had a full education in the nuances of sexual orientation, and emphasized her gayness to reassure Tara and to embrace a label to define herself. However, while I think she’s bi, I would describe her as having more attraction to women than men, and might even argue that all her attraction to men is demisexual—Xander’s obvious, and Oz did all the pursuing and showed all the interest early on. I think Willow was excited to be desired and to achieve the milestone of not only “boyfriend” but “cool boyfriend in a band” that helped distance herself from nerdiness, and it took a little while for that to build up to attraction and love. Not super long, but long enough for her to doubt her attraction when thinking about it in hindsight.
-speaking of Oz I have so many Oz thoughts. Oz, I love you, but where did you get the idea that you need to solve all your problems yourself and not talk to anybody about it? Stoicism is cool and all but use your words, Oz. You would solve so many of your problems if you learned how to communicate! WHO TAUGHT YOU TO BEHAVE THIS WAY. I haven’t gotten up to him yet but my fandom brain’s already there, he’s my favorite and I can’t wait to try applying this perception to him in action.
-I would love to peek into the alternate universe where Oz didn’t leave. Hell, I want to know what would have happened both if everything else was basically the same but Oz was still around as a main character (say, he wanted some distance to work on control but didn’t leave town; Willow was very upset about it but perhaps not to the same degree, and still met Tara while looking for a way to train/practice magic and developed feelings for her; New Moon Rising happened similarly but Oz doesn’t leave town at the end; alternately he did leave but just for the first stretch of episodes and he stays after NMR), and also in the different scenario where because Oz isn’t leaving, Xander is picked to be The Gay One. I mean, he’d have to be bi, too, and my mind honestly boggles at the hurdles the show might have had to leap to make it plausible, but I would like to see it. What kind of boyfriend would the show have given Xander, and why am I thinking of Schitt’s Creek when I wonder what a gay romance for Xander would look like?
...but I’m reeeeally getting ahead of myself now. I did not expect to have so many of my thoughts be about a. the dudes and b. Xander, but what can you do? Soon I’ll have material to talk about, for example, how amazing Cordelia is, but for now...
(and yes, I have been pinging from one fandom to the next in order to find The Right One, and doing one or two thought-dumps before I find myself moving on to a different one without finishing the first. I do not control the hyperfixation. I might go back and forth when the newest one loses its shine, but I am really enjoying the concept of revisiting Buffy for October, and might proceed to do the same with Teen Wolf when I’m done if only for a fascinated comparison between the two and what inspired what and what was improved upon or done worse. Might. Hyperfixation, remember.)
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I JUST WATCHED THE FINALE AND OH MY GOSH MY HEAD IS SPINNING I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS
I’ll give you my quick thoughts and then jump into Muffy because you already KNOW I am saving a whole section for them
Celia’s growth was amazing. I love that she went from being strict to being so carefree and trusting of Bex
Bex in that wedding dress 👏🏻 Bowie in that Tux 👌🏻 like they didn’t have to do that but they did 😭
The slow dance was SO CUTE OMG
I loved that all of them sang lady Gaga- the song was perfect for them but sad Garren wasn’t on stage with Sofia
However, they showed the ships singing together and whenever they showed Buffy they showed Marty so I was like 😩😭👏🏻 ya know
TJ playing the piano was all I could have asked for
I LOVED the scene when Cyrus and Buffy talked about “relationship woes” like wow. 😭😍 that hurt because the parrallels were so blatantly obvious but Terri made sure to take EQUAL time to explain their woes with each character.
Also WTF KIRA STOP TOUCHING TJ AND PUTTING YOUR ARM ON HIM. This has been my PSA
I LOVED watching TJ just RIP into Kira. Boi 👏🏻 told 👏🏻 her 👏🏻 off. He literally called her out for bullying and asked her to stop (likkkeeee not only was it great bc he was protective boyfriend mode™️ but because he showed growth. He defended Cyrus for something he used to do). It was great and a no Kira redemption was the best way they could have done that and it was was beautiful. 💯
I loved that Jandi scene! I have said I am actually ok with Jandi, but they needed more maturity. Andi needed to find herself and Jonah needed to be ready for a relationship. In time and when Andi can handle conflict, I think they would make a good pairing. But WITH TIME, like they said. Until then, Jonah has the cute bracelet. I think that was such a valuable lesson for kids to not rush something, just because you like someone. Make sure you are actually ready because crushes aren’t all just about endgames (which will sound hypocritical considering what I write next lol) but that they are a LOT of work and you have to have your head on correct to make sure you can handle it. Just *chef’s kiss*
I know Muffy was around this time (sorry my thoughts are so scattered- I am writing this post watching it so not everything is in a congruent timeline) but I am going to come back to them like I said earlier. They have a special reserved™️ section in this post 😍👏🏻
THE B[REDACTED]H SCENE. WAS SO CUTE. UGH
I laughed so hard at TJ’s name but gave all my uwu’s I had left post Muffy (which weren’t many but I reserved some for Tyrus) to that cute little line from Cyrus about how he liked his name 😭
That 👏🏻 hand 👏🏻 hold 👏🏻
Like watching TJ’s shaky fingers get all close I COULDN’T BREATHE-
They really out here making all benches gay huh?
And you could see how SHY TJ was talking to Cyrus. It was so sweet how flirty and awkward he got. I loved it.
I’m sure their hands were v sweaty but that’s a point for another day lol
I thought the scene was handled well considering their limits and tried to keep my expectations low, but TBH I was pretty bummed they didn’t actually say the words that they liked each other. I wish there was more dialogue than vague questions ya know? Oh well 🤷🏼♀️
I was also really REALLY hoping for some canon Muffy and Tyrus scenes at the party and kept checking the time stamp during the last scene hoping they would show SOMETHING but they didn’t say anything. Even just a quick “Hey I’m dating this person now and I love them all my uwu’s” would have been fine but it was like that was completely forgotten
However I’ve seen a few Tumblr posts about someone working on making fic text posts with the GHC talking about their canon ships so I’ll take what I can get :)
The Andi Shack and Andi getting into SAVA didn’t surprise me, but it was sweet
I really liked the whole side by side photo thing they did
What did surprise me was Jonah saying he loved Andi 😭 like that was such a sweet sentiment and I was just like, “Alexa play I Cried by Jonah Beck” you know?
Kinda also dissapointed we heard nothing more about Jonah’s panic attack’s, the hole in the wall, and possible Kippen Siblings
REALLY REALLY want an Andi Mack movie- they made a Lizzie McGuire one after only two seasons so they could with AM to address any plot holes (BUT IF THEY DO IT THEY BETTER HAVE CANON MUFFY AND TYRUS JOIN SO HELP ME BC MIRANDA WAS GONE IN TLMM AND I WAS READY TO SHOW HANDS)
Also other side note: I got kinda frustrated with all of the dancing/singing scenes. Like they were cute but also felt like a lot of wasted screen time (much like 3x19 or the Jonah/Cyrus camping scenes) when other plots could have been addressed
And no speaking lines for Amber? At all? Like...? Even with the Jonah stuff? Or redemption paralleling TJ. IDK seemed a lil wack to me
Ok here’s the good stuff
Muffy:
Again, Alexa play “I Cried” by Jonah Beck BECAUSE OH MY GOSH THEY WERE MY EVERYTHING
Surprisingly didn’t cry as much as 3x14 but I think that’s because I was shaking so bad (seriously I looked like I just went through a terrifying haunted house and stayed overnight in it, my hand trembling so much)
I rewatched the scenes WHICH ONLY MADE IT WORSE BECAUSE I CRIED MORE
I enjoyed writing my fics, but really really liked the way Terri handled this
I loved all of their scenes dancing together and it was funny because after Cyrus and Buffy talked, Buffy was like, “he doesn’t like me” but then Marty spent the ENTIRE night like RIGHT NEXT TO BUFFY. Not with the other girl. Literally physical space is not a real thing with them. Watch when they dance, or when they see CeCe in the Dino costume or any other time, Buffy and Marty are ONLY next to each other and Marty even moves closer to Buffy when they are all huddled around CeCe if you watch closely enough
The frog parallel? 😭👌🏻
Buffy addressing Marty instead of the other way around? 😭👌🏻
Marty “what’s going on?” 😭👌🏻
I loved when Marty called himself a dope 😂👏🏻 13/10 sweet boi
Also, watching Buffy get worked up because they can’t have a real conversation I’m 😭😭😭 you could see actual tears in her eyes and THEN GIRL WENT RUNNING OUTSIDE FOR SOME FRESH AIR
AND GUESS WHO CHASES AFTER HER- I’M—- UGHHHHHH I’m getting worked up thinking about it tbh
Marty tries the conversation again and she SAYS SHE LIKES HIM. NO HESItation what kind of ROMANCE—
Heidenjfbdhewiejdkdk
And then it was literal poetic cinema when he said he NEVER STOPPED LIKING HER AFTER THAT AWKWARD PAUSE AND GRABBED HER HANDS
It was so SOft-
And then they KISSED AND IT WAS REAL
I got my Muffy kiss 💅🏻 I just. I. You guys don’t understand. I was shipping this WAY before anyone really got on board. I remember trying to look up Muffy fan videos after two episodes of them together because I already fell in love with them and there was one like barely edited thirty second video on YouTube. I tried to post something on here and like two people liked it. I LIKED THEM WHEN BASICALLY NO ONE ELSE DID AND SO I FEEL LIKE I AM ONE OF THE MOST DESERVING OF THIS SHIP BEING ENDGAME AND NO ONE CAN FIGHT ME ON THIS JUST LET ME LOVE THEM
MUFFY KISS (sorry needed to say it one more time for emphasis)
And then they walked away together with their arms around each other 😭 If you watch closely Buffy kinda tucks her head into his arm and I’ve seen fics of them doing this so it made me heart 💗💓💓 when they actually did
I JUST WANT TO SEE THEM AS A CANON COUPLE IS THAT TO MUCH TO ASK
Please Terri Minksy, I beg of you, if you don’t get a S4 make a movie but it is REQUIRED BY LAW that Muffy and Tyrus are in the ENTIRE movie- being canon and cute. They don’t even need angst but I still want scenes with them together just being in love.
I will be spending the entire next week in complete denial that this show is over, while rewatching this episode ten times and reading every Muffy fic I can find. Thanks for coming to my Tedx talk.
#andi mack#marty from the party#buffy driscoll#muffy#tj kippen#cyrus goodman#am#andi mack spoilers#am spoilers#tyrus#jandi#amber#cece mack#bexie#bex mack#bowie mack#jonah beck#kira#jamber
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I'm glad I'm not the only one really happy about the way the episode turned out. Most people are sad, but it's the most clear since Swing Scene 2.0 that TJ has a crush on Cyrus. And if they're not gonna get Tyrus together till the finale, at least now they've got a story until then, and a genuinely interesting one. I find it sad that you have to explain to people that TJ wasn't really at fault here. The episode should have been clearer tbh.
To your last point: one of my fears is that the episode wasn’t clear enough and that’s likely because what we got was as clear as it could be at this time given the subject material and restrictions. I do think most people here on tumblr seem to get it, but we tend to be a pretty heavy LGBT (or, at least if not LGBT, pro-LGBT) sampling. Even then, quite a few people weren’t entirely sure. I can only imagine how it’ll translate to the general audience.
My other fear is that they won’t be able to handle this storyline with the care it deserves, so, for now, I will say I’m cautiously happy, assuming they’re able to pull through. But content wise, yeah, I like the idea. I’d like to see it explored to whatever extent they’re allowed to explore it. Hopefully that’s a little more than a light skimming.
Your point about his crush being clear is right and if there’s any solace to people who are bummed about how things are right now, it’s that you gotta believe that if TJ’s crush on Cyrus is so obvious that it’s being used as a plot point in the show, they’re going to pay that off in some way. (It’s sort of funny how we all used to watch Tyrus scenes looking for hints or behavior that pointed to a crush and now it’s swung so far into obvious territory that the other characters in the show can both see it and, sadly, use it against them.)
The last thing, about giving Tyrus an interesting storyline until the finale is something I also agree with.
There’s that “big event” coming up in episode 18 or so (who knows if things are gonna get shifted around with all these reshoots) that is sort of accepted as probably being the wedding. Luke didn’t shoot that week so there’s a very high likelihood Cyrus and TJ aren’t together because why not invite him to the big event otherwise, right?
My worry for a while has been that that was going to be caused simply be inaction. Cyrus and/or TJ not expressing their feelings, just kind of floating along on autopilot, pushed to the background, mostly ignored. Why isn’t TJ at the event with Cyrus? Because Cyrus didn’t think to ask him because they weren’t there yet in their relationship and that’s it.
That’s certainly less angsty, but, to me, it also feels sadder for the characters in the sort of meta-sense. It makes them seem not important enough to be considered.
Would it be nice if they could openly date and go to things together? Sure. Absolutely. But that doesn’t seem on the table so much at this point. So, in lieu of that, if they can’t, then I’d much rather they have an in-show reason as to why. I’d much rather it be because they’re at-odds. That, yes, Cyrus would’ve invited TJ as his plus-one except that their relationship is strained. It puts the two on a more even playing field with the other couples.
Are they going to be given as much attention as the other couples? No. Their relationship gets like, the diet version of the straight couples’ storylines. But I still find that better than ignoring them altogether.
I am getting ahead of myself and the show here. TJ should be back in 3x15 and who knows? It could go down like I laid out: relationship strain, drama, the middle piece of a multi-episode arc about them. Or Cyrus could confront TJ and TJ could go “Eh, yeah, Kira got in my head about it. Sorry.” And Cyrus forgives him and that’s it and then they do just get ignored until 3x19 the way they were mostly ignored in the first handful of episodes of season 3. I know which version I’d prefer.
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Icy’s Final Thoughts on VLD Season 8
I know I’m super late to the party but in the off chance anyone was wondering my thoughts on the season... here goes. All are tagged as spoilers but if you see this and have not seen the season, please do not read further.
These are in no particular order, just me reeling over various different things
The platonic Klance was strong and my heart is warm and fuzzy ♥ That is exactly what I hoped to see and I’m just so so so excited to see these boys so happy for one another. To see Keith especially in both of their one-on-one scenes supporting Lance just, mmm, so lovely. I’d have loved a hug but the handclasp was lovely too; very Shiro and Keith action.
I was very happy to see Romelle actually used as a character and a good one at that. Her connection to the Alteans was lovely and I particularly enjoyed that Coran was teaching her Altean traditions.
Hunk’s whisper of “Shay” there at the end with all the Balmeras coming together melted me.
I still want to know how Balmears can warp across the universe like that. Smh.
The big one here this season (two things, both with Allura, getting to the finale one in a bit) was definitely the Allurance.
I will admit, it was one of two pairings I was warming up to. I did honestly think, based on some hints I was getting, think it was going to go Allurance, it would tank, and end game would be Plance.
I loved Hunk being Lance’s wingman and what I truly loved was on their last night on Earth Lance wanted to share his family with Allura. I was about to headthunk and be like, no, please, Lance is all about his family and on his last night he wouldn’t just leave them... right? So I loved how that came about and loved all of his family and just, yes, family ♥
On that note, I loved so much of the family ties in here. Allura brought it up multiple times and Coran at the end had me almost in tears.
Really liked seeing some more backstory for Haggar. I had hope that by the end of the series she would regain herself over the poisoned quintessence and while it wasn’t quite the ending (still coming) I wanted I’m glad she found some measure of redemption after nearly destroying everyone and everything. I sympathize with her far far more than Sanda.
Also on Haggar, really loved the whole savior/goddess shtick she had going on and using the Alteans. Not quite as Lotor had done but perhaps even crueler in a way. Very nice villain ♥ Me gusta.
Also glad to see that Lotor did *not* get a redemption arc BUT
Child Lotor? holy shit I could not stop squealing. Dios mío. The whole accent especially on “Father” was sending me into spasms. Still is.
Lance with Altean markings? Sexy ♥
Coran being trusted to handle huge projects and coming through? Yes. Yes yes yes. All the love to the gorgeous man. As an aside, loved the whack-a-mole game of his
The filler episodes in this one (the carnival of a sort and the day 47) were both very well done. I especially liked getting to know some of the MFE pilots a bit more. Kinkade as a videographer is so lovely and Rizavi very strongly reminded me of me xDD
The whole “awkward” moment via Ina because of Axca had me dying. Love. Axca being so serious 24/7 and not understanding Veronica’s attempt at friendship I thought was really nice way of showing the differences in not just aliens but in backgrounds.
How did Shiro end up alone in the giant Voltron/Atlas combo? Anyone?
Speaking of Shiro... what is the name of his husband now? I’m so so glad he was able to find happiness after Adam and I know for the LGBT community what a big moment that was too. EDIT: Curtis!
Still bummed int hat last scene though that Pidge is not wearing a dress. Come on >>
Speaking of Pidge and outfits, I cringed and died and laughed so hard at the old Voltrons cartoon and her outfit at the mall. ohmhgoddd. Allura dressing up in hers too. Dios.
Also, Matt, why you cut your hair? Why? *gross sobbing*
Hunk with the food bringing people together was so beautiful and I was so glad to see it come back at the end too ♥
Wish there had been some more Keith and Shiro moments. I didn’t feel really any of that relationship and that made me sad.
Okay, and the big one. Allura’s death. I’ll be honest, I did not see that one coming although I did predict someone big would die: I honestly thought it was going to be either Shiro or Lance so I am glad on that front for my boy.
I am very torn to it as killing off a main character in the last nine minutes of an entire series is... a little hard to swallow. I am grateful she at least was able to have final words with each member of her family (except Coran T_____T) and I will admit to crying quite a bit.
I don’t anticipate writing any fanfiction really going forward but if I do write anything post season eight you can bet that Allura lives in my book. Coma maybe, and it takes a couple months/years to revive her, but they do it.
Then again I do appreciate the fact they were able to kill off a major character and her death was absolutely not in vain and was worked well into the plot. I just... poor everyone. Especially Coran and Lance
And last bit. Lance’s new Altean marks glowed at the end, which is only for “chosen” Alteans so... what exactly does that mean and how exactly did Allura give him them?
And last, last bit. I found it very fitting that we came full circle in the end. In discovering the Blue Lion we zoomed in on Lance’s face and then cut to the sky with the Lions (in memory) through his eyes and here we end it with zooming in and out on Lance’s face and to the Lions. It just... feels right. And solidifies my personal thought that Lance *is* the heart of Voltron ♥
AND last last thought. The mice? Where were the mice in like... all of this? I cry.
And Icy out. Feel free to respond in comments/reblogs below but I will not be posting any ask responses.
#VoltronSpoilers#Spoilers#VLD#Voltron#VLD8#Voltron8#VLDSpoilers#Voltron Season Eight#Season Eight#VLDSeason8#Icy's reactions
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A Day in the Life of Vet Student
For pretty much my entire life, I have been what is commonly known is rural New Zealand as a “townie”. The last 3 years of my life however, my career as a vet student has flung me in the farthest corners of the peaceful New Zealand countryside.
The 26th of August, 2019. I am having my first day of a rural vet practice clinical placement.
I wake up sleepy and sad to be leaving my all too warm bed heated by an electrical bed warmer.
My feet hit the cold floor. It’s 6.34 am. The sun has risen but I can’t see her behind the storm clouds, so the light in the air is the harsh fluorescent moody kind of light which makes you want to snuggle back into bed and sleep some more (which is kind of a permanent mood for me anyway but I mean whatever).
I hate the beginnings of placements. A new place. New strangers I have to interact with. The beginning of a period of interrupted sleep patterns. Boxed food. I generally try to avoid packing myself food (only because I’m lazy), but if you don’t have food on placement, you’d rather as well be dead. The work really builds up an appetite. You will find yourself eating literally anything you can get your dirty poopy hands on.
I get in the car and start driving. It was supposed to be a 30 minute drive according to Google maps, but nothing could have prepared me for the roads I needed to traverse that morning. I shall attempt to describe the drive using just a series of multiple single words:
windy, death, narrow, death, inappropriate-speed-limits (yes I’m aware these aren’t single words), death, SUVS-with-impatient-drivers-sticking-to the-bum-of-my-car, death, rain, wind, RAIN, death, 25kph recommended hairpin bends, death, DEATH
I arrive bright and early, 10 minutes before I am supposed to be here, just so I time to give myself a pep talk in the car. “Okay, Sana, you can do this. It’s okay. It’s going to be okay. You aren’t going to die. It’ll be fine. Just like your other placements. You’re okay. Breathe, breathe. Yes, like that. In… out….”
I walk into the clinic carrying my multiple pieces of paraphernalia and introduce myself at the reception. This is a huge clinic. Bigger than any of the others I’ve worked in so far.
They make me wait for a bit before taking me into the back room and introduce me to the vet I’ll be working with today. The center has about 5 large animal vets whom I will be working closely with over the next two weeks.
We start getting ready for the first call out of the day.
I’m wearing work pants, a long sleeve t-shirt under a polo t-shirt under a sweater, two pairs of socks (cute pink patterned ones under a proper pair of farmer work socks), and a pair of steel toed work boots. I am still really frikking cold. My toes and fingers are ice-blocks.
Before we go out, I don a pair of overalls, wet weather overalls, and a rain jacket. I put on a beanie I’m willing to ruin, and switch my boots for a pair of gumboots. As I said, it is really a terribly stormy cold cold cold day.
We get in the vet’s truck. It is really nothing less than a magical thing. It holds everything that they might need during a call out. Starting with the syringes, needles, and drugs, right down to a 6 foot metal calving jack which I will describe a little later.
The boot of the car generally has a fitted wooden trunk with draws filled with stuff. On top of this, there are tubs full of the most random things. If it’s a UTE (utility vehicle), the sides open up as well and hold more vet thingamajigs. The backseat has even more stuff! (surprise)
We get into the car and start driving.
Our first call out is a farmer who wants to do some spring bloods.
(A little background on this: Spring is the season during which cows generally give birth over here. So the season is also called calving. After cows give birth, they get their calves taken off them and put into sheds on milk powder or milk from different cows so the mother can be put into a milking herd and her milk collected and sold. Generally, after calving, and after milk production starts, if the cow hasn’t eaten enough during her pregnancy, her body can go into a negative energy balance state, where she is producing more than her body has/can make. Her calcium and magnesium levels are the first to drop. If this happens, she can collapse. The farmers usually try to treat this themselves in the beginning by providing them with calcium/magnesium supplements with an energy formula. When this doesn’t work, they call out the vets.)
Spring bloods are done to check how the herd is doing nutritionally and whether they have any deficiencies. Usually, we take around 10 blood samples and it can serve as proxy for a herd of around 200-ish cows.
We get there and get everything else set up. The farmer has already taken out 10 cows for us and lined them up so we can get right to it.
It is my first time taking blood from a cow.
In our practical sessions during the last two semesters, we’ve drawn blood from sheep. Cows are a little different. From sheep, we usually take blood from the jugular vein under the neck. In cows, we take blood from the blood vessel under the tail.
When working with cows, it is really really easy to get covered in poop. If you aren’t in the industry, you’d be surprised. Farmed cows are just always pooping, especially when they are being handled. Their poop is also usually semi-liquid so when it falls on the concrete floor, it does a wonderful acrobatic job of splashing up and covering parts of your body you didn’t even know existed. I learnt my lesson early after spending my summer two years ago on a dairy farm. But that’s a story for a different time.
Because of this constant poop assault, you need to be covered well and also know which parts of your body to expose (your hands upto your elbows, cuz its easier washing poop off skin than it is washing it off sleeves).
How to draw blood from a cow: Ensure cow is properly positioned so the bum is facing you. Lift tail up and with your other hand, feel for a little divet on the bottom part of the tail close to the body. The divet will be shaped kind of like a ‘B’. Right in the center of the B, you will find the blood vessel. It’s a bit of a juggle knowing what to hold using what fingers. Because while holding the tail and feeling for the hard-to-locate-blood-vessel, you have to uncap your needle and pierce the skin; all while not poking yourself or dropping the vacutainer (which collects the blood due to a vacuum) in the 5 cm poopy slush on the floor.
My first cow, I had to pierce about 3 times to find the right spot. My second cow, I dropped stuff, didn’t find the blood vessel and once I found it, I lost it. So I didn’t get quite enough blood. My 3rd and 4th cows were fine.
Cows tails get quite wet and poopy so they’re difficult to hold. Also, while you’re drawing the blood, it IS totally possible for the cow to start pooping on you. It gets everywhere, the stuff. And it’s not like all of them stand still and don’t move.
SO, a more accurate picture is you standing close to the bum of a pooping cow trying to hold on the tail desperately while it’s wildly struggling and you can’t let go because the needle is stuck up the tail!
Lovely.
Our second call out was nothing short of shocking.
It was supposed to be just a retained placenta/foetal membranes. Sometimes after cows give birth, their placenta doesn’t detach and come out (as afterbirth) which is supposed to happen. So a vet goes over and has to remove it manually.
As a 3-year veterinary veteran, I thought I’d seen some things. Nothing could have prepared me for this.
We arrive at the farm and in an open hay shed at the front, the farmer’s wife is waiting for us. A little bit of a mental picture adjustment for the reader: In India, when we think farmer, kissan, we usually think of a tanned man in a lungi and a dirty shirt – shoeless. Well, that’s my mental picture anyway. This is how they have always been portrayed in movies and because I’ve never had anything to do with farming in India, this mental image just stuck with me//
In New Zealand, the term farmer means something else entirely. The word farmer is used to refer to a man who actually owns the farm, either a sheep, dairy cow, deer, goat, or pig farm. Sheep and dairy cow farms are the most common.
Farmers here have really surprisingly appropriate gear. Water proof trousers, good sturdy gumboots, either a waterproof overcoat or a woollen fleece pullover or jacket, topped off with a beanie (usually gotten free from Farmlands or any other giant farming stores. Each piece of gear costs on average 200$. So if you’re looking for an industry to invest in…
So the farmer’s wife is all decked up in expensive looking waterproof gear (yes it is still pouring and very very windy). She has her legs crossed, hands in her pockets; and is sitting really casually on a hay bale while her dogs run around her. The expression on her face is almost amused tinged with a 2% strain of boredom.
The cow we are supposed to calve is behind her. On the floor. She looks so done with everything, the cow I mean, not the wife.
We get out of the car and start collecting our gear.
We walk over, exchange pleasantries and start examining the cow. She has a slightly high rectal temperature and her breathing is laboured. She looks a little bloated.
The vet immediately dons a glove sleeve (A glove which goes up all the way to the shoulder) and sticks her hand up the cows vagina and gasps. “There’s a calf in there!”, she tells us.
Since we were called out for retained foetal membranes, we were assuming that the cow had already calved (given birth). Finding another calf in there is a little bit of a big deal because twins aren’t very common in the dairy industry.
“Why don’t you go ahead and have a feel”, she tells me.
I am all too exciting to be sticking my hand in there.
I put on a glove sleeve, making sure to stretch it at the top like one of my lecturers taught us.
Glove sleeves has an amazing remarkable capacity to roll down and bunch up at the elbow just when you’re getting really poopy which defeats the whole purpose of the thing.
Stretching it along the axis towards the top of it constricts the plastic a little so it holds the arm and has less of a chance of slipping down.
I put a little lube on my palm and stick my hand in.
The first sensation you feel when sticking your hand into a cow, whichever orifice it is, is warmth. A whole lot of warmth. This wasn’t my first time inside a cow. I’ll probably write about that another time.
So I stick my hand in and start advancing it further up the canal, and before long I can feel a small hoof. I push further until I feel the chin of the calf. Yup, she had a twin left inside.
The farmer’s wife tells us that she calved over a week ago, and so the vet explains that the calf inside her has probably died and already started rotting.
So now, we start to extract the smelly rotten calf.
We try getting the cow to stand. It’s hard enough trying to get a calf out of a standing cow, and near impossible to get one out of a recumbent cow.
The farmer brings a tractor and lifts up the bottom half of her body into standing position using a special holder that clasps onto the protruding hip girdles of the cow.
The vet pumps a few litres of lube into the cow using a special pump and then puts her hands in and tries pulling the calf out using the forelimbs. We pull for about 10 minutes before deciding that we need the calving jack. Oh yeah, time to bring out the big guns.
The calving jack is made of two metal pieces. The first piece is a 6 foot hollow tube thingy which isn’t actually round, it’s more cuboidal in cross section. The second piece is kind of like a holder ting that sits on the hip girdles of the cow.
You have to attach ropes onto the legs of the calf (while it’s inside, yes) and a rope onto the head. These ropes are attached to the handle of the calving jack and you basically jack it backwards. This motion makes it easier to pull the calf out. Physics, yay!
So we try that for about like half an hour and we only just about manage to get it out halfway. So the head is out now, and it’s pitifully hanging out the mom back side.
The cow’s vagina was doing a really terrible job of dilating: it wasn’t.
So we basically chop the calf in half using a hunting knife. Yep, that’s what we do. The calf was dead, please remember so you don’t get more freaked out than you already are at this point.
The next thing we are going to do is chop the rest of the calf into pieces while it’s inside the uterus and then remove each piece individually.
There’s a special apparatus that does this. Its basically a sharp wire that you need to get in and around a point where the body bends; we chose to get the wire between the legs.
Once the wire is around where it needs to be and both the ends are out, you need to insert them through two tubes and attach the ends to handles.
Making a sawing motion cuts whatever needs cutting inside.
So I hold the apparatus and the vet starts sawing. It takes us an hour until we make a cut through the flesh and bone.
She puts her hand in again and pulls out one leg, and then pulls out the other leg with a bit of difficulty because it’s still attached to the hip bones.
Every bit of that carcass smells exactly like what it is, a rotting mess. The teeth were falling out, the fur was coming off in tufts. It was exactly what you’d expect from a decomposing body.
So yeah, that was a tough calving.
But it doesn’t end there.
She puts her hand back inside to feel for any more debris that needs removing and she find instead a hole in the uterus!
I put my hand in and can feel the flaps of a really large hole through which I can also feel the stomach and the kidneys. Because of this hole, we are pretty sure that some of the infected rotting stuff has entered the usually sterile space of the abdomen. The cow is doomed.
After spending around 3 hours getting out the calf to save the mamas life, it was so sad to find that hole which had obviously been there a while. There was no possible way to treat that, and the cow was going to die a slow and painful death if we didn’t do anything.
So we spoke to the farmer and he said he would shoot it and that was that.
It was so heartbreaking.
We come back to the clinic really demotivated.
After lunch, I go out with another vet to treat a ‘down cow’. Cows go down due to the whole deficiency thing I already explained above.
It was s t i l l RAINING. It was still cold. It was still windy. And out we went.
I’ll keep this last call out short: the vet didn’t have a four wheel drive, the cow was in the middle of a field, we had to walk half a kilometre in the rain and kept coming back to the car because we forgot things, the wind was stinging our faces, the cow was shivering, we treated the cow, it wasn’t getting up, the rain got heavier, it got colder. Yeah so that was our last call out.
I got home at like maybe 5.30, showered and went to the library to study.
And that concludes a day in the life of a vet student.
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