#am I not good enough to kill 🥺🥺💔

[seitmai]

Many thoughts...

Love at first sight, it was. But hell, love wasn’t enough, was it?  What did he know about raising a little girl?  What did he know of walking that tricky line between being overprotective and being too blasé, of giving you space but making you feel safe?

 just that he is questions this, shows how much he cares about her 🫶🏻

Cecilia had stopped over a lot in the beginning, had soothed his fears.  Had reassured him that love was enough, that he was doing a good job.  He was kind and well-meaning, and you had been a smart kid who became a smart woman, and on the balance, he would have agreed with Cecilia and said he did alright.

Awesome job right there👏🏻

For the first time in his life, Rhett truly considers his future.  What his life may look like in five, ten, twenty years.  Will he always wake to grey mornings that sit on his chest like a stone?  Will he become bitter and mean, the way his father has despite having a wife and sons and a granddaughter? 

Uff he truly doesn't have the best role model..

Then, on top of the annoyance, another layer of shame.  Of course you run.  The death of your parents left you with that wound, the inability to handle hurt in a healthy way.  You flee and tuck yourself in a corner, tend your wounds alone.  It’s a flaw, but it’s understandable why you do it.

Very understandable reaction especiallywith that backstory..

Rhett had been your best friend, and for the briefest summer, he was your lover too.  He should have been the one person to help you work through that fear.  Instead, he only cemented it further.

💔💔💔

It’s easy to blame Rhett when Wyatt eats dinner alone each night.  When he runs a vacuum over the floor of your bedroom, keeps it dust free like you may turn up any day and take your place back on the family ranch.  When he studies the row of family photos on the mantle, sees his sister’s face and feels like he’s failed her in the care of her daughter.

He misses her so much 🥺

But Wyatt doesn’t confront Rhett at the Double Deuces.  He doesn’t seek him out at all. Rhett comes to him.

👀

“You never fucking think, do you?  Jesus fucking Christ, my sister…her husband…they were killed by a fucking drunk driver, and you have the fucking balls to…you asshole…you fucking piece of shit.  You—” The kid seems to track Wyatt’s meaning.  His bleary eyes clear a fraction and fix on where Wyatt’s fists wait, eager to offer some payback for his sins.  Rhett nods, as if to himself, and he takes a deep breath.  Closes his eyes, opens them.  He struggles to stand, staggers a little, but eventually finds his feet.

Wyatts anger is very understandable and valid, but it seem to penetrate even Rhett’s drunken state

“Make it her.”  It comes out one slurred word, makeither, and Wyatt’s anger cools by the barest degree.  He unclenches his fists, holds them looser. “What the fuck you trying to say?” Rhett coughs, sways.  Coughs again, then enunciates, clarifies. “Make it hurt.  Make sh…sure.  Make sure it hurts.” Wyatt’s fists uncurl more.  “Now what are you—” “Am.  Piece of shit.  I am.”  The kid sways more but takes a wide step, braces his legs wide to keep himself upright.  “Y’right.  Imma piece a’shit.” He wants to be hurt because it’s the only thing he knows, he thinks.  Like I used to.

💔😭💔😭💔

Maybe Wyatt only fell into fatherhood because of a tragedy, but he gets more of it right than he will ever give himself credit for.  He faces the kid, and when the kid comes swinging at him again, spoiling for a beat-down Wyatt will never deliver after all, Wyatt only opens his arms and lets Rhett step into them.  The kid struggles for a beat but he’s drunk, and he seems tired down to his soul. It only takes a moment for the kid to stop struggling in Wyatt’s bear-hug, then sag against him in exhaustion, then weep in dry, barking sobs that feel like they’ve been building up for his entire life.  And Wyatt knows exactly what sort of pain the kid is bleeding out because it was his pain, and his sister’s too, until they both fled their unhappy childhood home and made a happier one here on this ranch.

Wyatt gives Rhett the hug he himself needed years ago 😭🥺

Wyatt is never sure the right way to tell you that Rhett Abbott is currently crashing with him.  A month passes and then another, and he starts to feel guilty that the kid who broke your heart has been living down the hall from your childhood bedroom, sitting at your kitchen table.  That he parks his truck beside yours, and that he’s caught the kid—more than once—lingering by your bedroom door, lingering by your truck, like your ghost might manifest if he stands still enough.

That's a tough spot..

I can’t be mad about it, you write back.  How many times did you look the other way when I brought a stray home? 

I guess you deserve a stray of your own.  Might want to take him in for his shots though. :-) 

You got a heart of gold, kiddo, Wyatt texts you, and your response is immediate.

That's so cute, they have such a beautiful relationship 🥰

Wyatt grins when he reads your email, then glances over at where Rhett is sitting on the couch, watching TV.  The kid does act like a stray; he cringes the barest bit if Wyatt moves too suddenly or too close to him, but like a stray, he relishes the comfort of a warm home, food in his belly, and even the tamest praise.

He really is a stray 🤭

Got it from my uncle.

🥹🥹🥹

Wyatt won’t know it until years from now, when he’s an old man and Rhett has grey in his own hair, but this stretch of time—the two men working and living together—is when Rhett starts to learn how to be a man.  That Wyatt is the gruff but kind, slightly awkward father-figure Rhett always needed.

I'm so glad Rhett gets the chance to experience this kind of relationship and space to grow 🥹

Heart of gold, indeed.  It makes Wyatt tear up, first from so much pride it feels like his chest might burst, then from that knife edge of grief that his sister isn’t here to see what a force for good her daughter turned into.

🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

“Nah.  I don’t know if hate is something she can even feel.  Dislike, maybe.  Disappointment.  Not hate.”  “She should hate me.  I deserve it.”

He is so hard on himself 🥺

“I didn’t mean to hurt her, you know.  Sounds fucking stupid, but at the time, I didn’t even realize what I was doing to her.”  Rhett glances over at the man, fixes his eyes back on the floor.  “Looking back, it felt like I was sleepwalking through that summer, and now I’m awake and see all the damage I did.” “Damned if I know.  But take it from me, kid.  I had a girl when I was your age, and I fucked it up completely.  Even once I realized how badly I fucked up, I was too proud to try and set it right.  Now it’s been years and it’s far too late.  So you gotta try, so even if she never forgives you, it’ll set right in your chest that you did everything you could.”

I love their honest and open conversations 🥰

Your uncle glances over at Rhett, nods in his direction.  “We’re doing okay for a couple of guys.”

They truly are 🫶🏻🥹

You laugh, and the sound makes Rhett smile – when was the last time he heard it?  It draws another laugh, which makes Rhett laugh, which makes you stop and ask your uncle if Rhett is there too. “He is,” Wyatt admits.  “We’re watching the football game.” There’s a beat of silence from you that seems to stretch out forever but is probably only a second or two. “Merry Christmas, Rhett,” you say, and Wyatt hesitates, then tilts the screen so Rhett can see you and you can see him.  He almost doesn’t want to look but he can’t help himself.

🥹🥹🥹

“In that case, Uncle Wyatt, work him into the ground,” you joke back, and Wyatt turns his phone back to him this time, and Rhett is left with perhaps a bit more than a sliver of hope.  He leans back on the couch and thinks that yes, maybe he can salvage this after all. Maybe trying his best will be enough.

I'm sure it will 🥹🫶🏻

I absolutely loved this story and the relationship Rhett and Wyatt built, truly beautiful 🥰

Kind of a Sh*thead

(Rhett Abbott x F!Reader)

CW:  Angst; family-type healing; allusions to and threat of violence; bit of fluff at the end.

Word Count: 5256

AN:  This was originally requested by @elegantmusicdragon from a long-ago Christmas prompt list: "trying to hide their sadness during the christmas celebration" from the sad christmas prompts? Definitely angst...maybe with a little hope at the end?"

AN: This is the next piece in the "Mending Fences" miniseries, found here.

It will shame Rhett in the future, how long it takes for him to realize what has happened. 

That night at the bar, he sat waiting for you:  nursing a beer, his eyes on the door, ready to get a little loose with you and maybe head out to the open range and fool around. 

Then Maria appeared in front of him.  Like magic.  Like an angel spirited back to Wabang and right in front of him.  It threw him off completely, his world tilting sideways  He found himself dazzled by the fact that the girl he pined over for years was suddenly in front of him, smiling, laughing, touching his arm and squeezing his bicep while he subtly flexed it under her fingers.

It wasn’t until last call that Rhett surfaced for a moment, the spell lifting for long enough to remember he was supposed to meet you, yet you were nowhere to be found.

She must have been held over late at work, he reasoned, and even as he thought it, he knew it was a lie. 

It will shame Rhett in the future, but it will take months before he really feels that shame.  He’ll find out you left early for school, but by then, he will be entirely wrapped in the magic of Maria, dumb with lust and love that he thinks is finally reciprocated.  He'll send you a handful of texts, bland little things that you read but don’t respond to. 

Months later, when Wabang is sliding fast to a cold winter and Maria is gone again, disappeared as quickly as she appeared, Rhett will feel shame.

And you’ll be long gone.

*****

Wyatt wishes he knew what he was doing.  Hell, he’d be happy for an inkling.

When his sister and brother-in-law died, he didn’t even hesitate to step up and take his niece in.  No brainer.  Blood is blood, but Wyatt loved his sister something fierce, and taking you in was like holding on to a part of her even if she was gone. 

Didn’t hurt that Wyatt loved you for you.  That he had loved you from the first time his sister set you in his arms, a bundle only a few days old.  You’d set your wide eyes on him and blinked sleepily, then puked up a torrent of milk on him that reeked something fierce.

Love at first sight, it was.

But hell, love wasn’t enough, was it?  What did he know about raising a little girl?  What did he know of walking that tricky line between being overprotective and being too blasé, of giving you space but making you feel safe? 

Cecilia had stopped over a lot in the beginning, had soothed his fears.  Had reassured him that love was enough, that he was doing a good job.  He was kind and well-meaning, and you had been a smart kid who became a smart woman, and on the balance, he would have agreed with Cecilia and said he did alright.

Nothing about this feels alright, though.

Wyatt always guessed it was Rhett Abbott who left you stranded at that hotel when you were a senior in high school.  Little fucker skulked around that entire summer, scampered away like a cat with a lit tail when he saw Wyatt coming.  Something had happened between the two of you.

When you came back to Wabang finally, you took up with the little fucker again, and Wyatt thought maybe he had been unkind.  Ungenerous.  He tried to be nicer to Rhett, but the kid barely ever mets his eyeline.

What the hell, Wyatt thought.  The Abbotts can be a squirrelly bunch.  As long as he doesn’t hurt her.

All those years ago at the hotel, Wyatt was never sure who it was that left you stranded and tear-streaked.  This time, though?

You confirmed it that evening when you got home, eyes unseeing as you charged past him, thundered up the stairs, started packing.  When he confronted you, you burst into tears and spilled the entire sorry affair.

You and Rhett, hanging out all summer.  You in love, and Rhett…not.  Not with you, anyway. 

Wyatt wasn’t stupid.  When you said hanging out, he could guess what you meant.

Seeing his niece hurt like that made him see red, but he has a modicum of maturity, which means he bides his time in most things. 

*****

Maria’s been gone for months.

You’ve been gone for longer.

Winter in Wyoming is no joke.  Wabang gets less snow than other parts, but the wind cuts marrow-deep, and the days are short, grey affairs.  The holidays could be a break from the doldrums, but Royal has been on a tear lately, lighting into Rhett for every little thing, so Thanksgiving, then Christmas are tense and joyless.

For the first time in his life, Rhett truly considers his future.  What his life may look like in five, ten, twenty years.  Will he always wake to grey mornings that sit on his chest like a stone?  Will he become bitter and mean, the way his father has despite having a wife and sons and a granddaughter? 

He sends you texts.  Little one-liners, asking how you are, saying he misses you.  He tries to feel you out, but you leave him on read and never respond.

Once, he gets blisteringly drunk and tries to call.  You don’t pick up, and he doesn’t leave a message.

By now, the shame has settled into him and made itself at home. 

He can guess that you came by the bar that night.  He can guess that you saw him and Maria, and that’s what caused you to flee.  Layered on top of the shame is an annoyance with you and your knack for running.  He may be an asshole but you’re a child to run and hide when shit gets tough.

Then, on top of the annoyance, another layer of shame.  Of course you run.  The death of your parents left you with that wound, the inability to handle hurt in a healthy way.  You flee and tuck yourself in a corner, tend your wounds alone.  It’s a flaw, but it’s understandable why you do it.

Rhett had been your best friend, and for the briefest summer, he was your lover too.  He should have been the one person to help you work through that fear.  Instead, he only cemented it further.

*****

March.  The leaden skies start to take on some blue, high up in the atmosphere.  The sun burns a little warmer.  The barnyard thaws into a swamp, and Wyatt has to handle the anxious animals, pawing and snorting and half-mad from a winter of cabin fever.

March is a tough month, though, because you call and tell him you aren’t coming back to Wabang for the summer.  You got a coveted internship with a specialty vet hospital in the city, and while Wyatt knows it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for you, it’s far easier to blame that fucking asshole Abbott boy.

It’s easy to blame Rhett when Wyatt eats dinner alone each night.  When he runs a vacuum over the floor of your bedroom, keeps it dust free like you may turn up any day and take your place back on the family ranch.  When he studies the row of family photos on the mantle, sees his sister’s face and feels like he’s failed her in the care of her daughter.

He’s not irrational about it.  He knows he has to let you fly and trust you’ll return.  Vet training is a long process—it’s not like you went off to Cheyenne for a handful of bookkeeping courses.  He knows, deep-down, you would have always left for your schooling.

Still, that fucking Abbott boy has built up a tab, in Wyatt’s eyes.  March is when that tab comes due.

-----

He knows the boy drinks at the Double Deuces.  It’s common gossip how he overdoes it and either gets ornery with the Tillerson’s or pukes himself silly in the parking lot.  There’s whispers of the fights between Royal and the boy, how the elder Abbott is tired of bailing out his youngest son, though no one would ever accuse Royal of having any patience, especially where Rhett is concerned.

If it were anyone else—any other dickhead young buck—Wyatt would chuckle in sympathy.  He used to do the same when he was younger.  He knows what the Wabang drunk tank looks like.  Hell, maybe his name is still there—he scratched it into the pea-green paint of the wall decades back to commemorate his first overnight stay.

But Wyatt doesn’t confront Rhett at the Double Deuces.  He doesn’t seek him out at all.

Rhett comes to him.

It’s a Saturday night, and Wyatt is lazing in front of the TV, watching the recaps of the week’s basketball games.  He’s half-asleep when he hears the heavy, scuffing tread of boots on his porch, then a thumping fist at the door.

When he peeks out of the window to see who it is, it’s the fucking asshole.  Rhett sways unsteady on his feet.  Wyatt opens the door, and he can smell the reek of cheap beer and brown liquor.  When he peers out farther, he can see where the fucking asshole parked his truck, half in the driveway and half in the yard, the tires sunk deep in the soft spring turf.

“You drive here like that?” Wyatt asks, though it’s obvious.

The kid nods.

Wyatt sighs, scrubs his hand over his jaw.  “Tell me you came from next door.  Tell me you were drinking at home and not out on the roads fucking loaded.”

Rhett stares at him, his eyes bleary and blood-shot, his blinks slow and deliberate.  “Came from t’bar,” he slurs.

“Fucking prick.”  Wyatt breathes it out. 

His vision wavers for a moment, the rage that courses through him is so hot and sudden.  He moves towards the kid just as Rhett sways towards him, and in a blink, Wyatt finds his hands on him, his sweat-dampened t-shirt twisted in his fists.  This close, the beer fumes make his eyes water, and when Wyatt studies the kid’s face, he sees blank stupefaction. 

“You fucking little prick.”  He pivots, turns, hauls Rhett away from the front door, down off the porch.  He half-drags, half-carries him, and once they are on the soft grass of the front yard, Wyatt shoves him away.

“Stupid, selfish.  So fucking selfish.”  The rage feels good, like a narcotic in his veins.  “You could have killed someone, driving like this.”

“I didn’t…”  Rhett sways on his feet, struggles to get his balance.  “Didn’t—”

“Didn’t what?”

“Didn’t t-think—”

Wyatt is on him again, his hands firm on Rhett’s chest as he shoves him in earnest, sends the kid stumbling back on his ass.  “You never fucking think, do you?  Jesus fucking Christ, my sister…her husband…they were killed by a fucking drunk driver, and you have the fucking balls to…you asshole…you fucking piece of shit.  You—”

But he can’t even finish.  His sister and brother-in-law, your parents.  Years ago now, but the pain is still fresh, a keen edge of a knife blade that takes his breath away.  It was after a rodeo, a random Saturday.  One stupid fucking decision and Wyatt lost his family, you lost your parents, and the rest of the world had the bad taste to keep on going. 

There’s a roadside memorial on the road out of Wabang that marks the site of the crash.  It makes that knife blade of grief twist in Wyatt’s gut every time he sees it.

Anger—rage—is such a close neighbor to grief.  Grief is something one has to feel, but anger?  That’s something to embrace, to lean into.  To do.

Wyatt advances on Rhett, his big fists opening and closing as the kid struggles to get back on his feet.  Wyatt wants to beat the shit out of him, wants to see him bruised and bloodied on the ground:  for hurting you years ago, for hurting you more recently, and now this.  For taking his life and the life of anyone else on the road into his own stupid, selfish hands.

Rhett manages to find his knees, and he kneels in the grass but can seem to get no further.  Wyatt towers over him.

“Get up,” he orders.  His voice is low, deadly, and his tone must penetrate the booze-fog because the kid tilts his head up and looks at him. 

“Get up,” he repeats.  “Get up and face it like a man.”

Rhett only manages a dumbfounded, “huh?”

“You wanna drive a big truck like a big man?  Drink at the Double D’s like a big fucking man?  You wanna fuck around with my niece and break her fucking heart like a big man?  So stand up and take what’s coming to you like a man.”

The kid seems to track Wyatt’s meaning.  His bleary eyes clear a fraction and fix on where Wyatt’s fists wait, eager to offer some payback for his sins.  Rhett nods, as if to himself, and he takes a deep breath.  Closes his eyes, opens them.  He struggles to stand, staggers a little, but eventually finds his feet.

“Make it her.”  It comes out one slurred word, makeither, and Wyatt’s anger cools by the barest degree.  He unclenches his fists, holds them looser.

“What the fuck you trying to say?”

Rhett coughs, sways.  Coughs again, then enunciates, clarifies.

“Make it hurt.  Make sh…sure.  Make sure it hurts.”

Wyatt’s fists uncurl more.  “Now what are you—”

“Am.  Piece of shit.  I am.”  The kid sways more but takes a wide step, braces his legs wide to keep himself upright.  “Y’right.  Imma piece a’shit.”

As quickly as Wyatt’s rage came on him, it flees him just as fast.  He sees it just as clear as day, how Rhett Abbott ain’t a man.  He’s just a boy playing at it, fucking up as he goes.  Wyatt knows as well as anyone the sort of father the kid has, Royal Abbott is no model of what a man should be. 

The kid standing in front of him is just a hurt animal:  hurt by his own father, hurt by his own behavior because he has no idea how to not take out his hurt on others.

He waves his hand at the kid, a dismissive gesture, and he starts to turn away.  He is halfway back to the house when he hears the kid coming for him, feels the weak glancing blow of the punch that has no aim or power because the kid is too drunk.

He wants to be punished, he thinks as he turns back around to face Rhett.  He knows Royal is hard on his youngest son, can guess that the kid’s been knocked around plenty.  His own father…well, he keeps that buried in the past, but sometimes it pops up like a bad penny.  Like now. 

He wants to be hurt because it’s the only thing he knows, he thinks.  Like I used to.

Maybe Wyatt only fell into fatherhood because of a tragedy, but he gets more of it right than he will ever give himself credit for.  He faces the kid, and when the kid comes swinging at him again, spoiling for a beat-down Wyatt will never deliver after all, Wyatt only opens his arms and lets Rhett step into them.  The kid struggles for a beat but he’s drunk, and he seems tired down to his soul.

It only takes a moment for the kid to stop struggling in Wyatt’s bear-hug, then sag against him in exhaustion, then weep in dry, barking sobs that feel like they’ve been building up for his entire life.  And Wyatt knows exactly what sort of pain the kid is bleeding out because it was his pain, and his sister’s too, until they both fled their unhappy childhood home and made a happier one here on this ranch.

“Christ almighty,” Wyatt says after the kid calms.  He doesn’t let him go—he only gets an arm around his shoulders, and he leads him inside. 

No sense sending him home to his father.  He’s here now, so he might as well sleep it off on the couch.

-----

It’s less than a month before Rhett returns.  Maybe a handful of weeks later, the kid turns up on Wyatt’s step, sheepish.  Looking small.

Wyatt will never be clear exactly why Rhett and Royal fall out so terrifically.  Who can say?  The Abbotts can be squirrelly fucking assholes, back to Royal’s father and probably even further back, but Rhett finds himself kicked out with nowhere to go.

He takes the couch for a night, but the next day, Wyatt thrusts some fresh sheets in the kid’s arms and directs him to the guest room down the hall.  Past your bedroom.

“Might sleep better in an actual bed,” he tells the kid, his voice gruff.

“I’ll be out as soon as I can.”  Rhett’s ears burn red in shame.  “Just gotta line up a place.”

“No rush.”

“Seriously, I’ll—”

“I got plenty of room.  You ain’t putting me out.”

-----

Wyatt is never sure the right way to tell you that Rhett Abbott is currently crashing with him.  A month passes and then another, and he starts to feel guilty that the kid who broke your heart has been living down the hall from your childhood bedroom, sitting at your kitchen table.  That he parks his truck beside yours, and that he’s caught the kid—more than once—lingering by your bedroom door, lingering by your truck, like your ghost might manifest if he stands still enough.

Every time you call.  Each Facetime.  Wyatt wants to say something and doesn’t.

Wyatt ends up taking the coward’s way out:  he sends you an email.  Keeps it short and sweet, apologizes for not saying anything sooner.  He alludes to the situation between father and son, but clarifies that Rhett is in no way forgiven for how he treated you.  It’s just that the kid needed a soft place to land, and he had the ability to help, so he felt it was his God-given duty to do so.

But I can ask him to leave, if you want, he writes.  If it makes you uncomfortable.  You’ll always be my first and top priority, kiddo.

It takes you two days to reply, but that means nothing.  You have a brutal schedule and often go radio silent for stretches of time.  When you do reply, it makes Wyatt smile.

I can’t be mad about it, you write back.  How many times did you look the other way when I brought a stray home?  I guess you deserve a stray of your own.  Might want to take him in for his shots though. :-) 

Wyatt grins when he reads your email, then glances over at where Rhett is sitting on the couch, watching TV.  The kid does act like a stray; he cringes the barest bit if Wyatt moves too suddenly or too close to him, but like a stray, he relishes the comfort of a warm home, food in his belly, and even the tamest praise.

You got a heart of gold, kiddo, Wyatt texts you, and your response is immediate.

Got it from my uncle.

-----

Through the summer and autumn, the two men fall into a rhythm.  It isn’t so bad living with the kid, once he starts to get his sea-legs under him.  Once he starts to feel like the bottom won’t drop out.  Rhett puts in an honest day’s work on the ranch, and Wyatt pays him.  The first time he presses money on the kid, he tries to push it away, embarrassed at what he thinks is more charity on top of the charity of room and board…

“You work for me, you work for me,” Wyatt said, blunt.  “Means you get paid by me.  Take it or leave.”

Wyatt won’t know it until years from now, when he’s an old man and Rhett has grey in his own hair, but this stretch of time—the two men working and living together—is when Rhett starts to learn how to be a man.  That Wyatt is the gruff but kind, slightly awkward father-figure Rhett always needed.

There are lessons embedded in their days working the ranch.  The lessons ease Rhett out of the fog of his life, the strange liminal space of being in his early twenties but still just a kid.

When Rhett royally fucks up a stretch of fencing, ruins a day of work.  Wyatt only grunts, shakes his head, then claps Rhett on the back.

“You can either take the time to plan out a job, or plan on doing the job twice,” is all he says, and he guesses that Royal would have belted his son into the dirt for such an error.

When Wyatt tasks Rhett with a simple rewiring job in the barn, replacing some light fixtures, and the kid has no idea where to even start.  He spends half the day sweating about it, a sick feeling churning in his stomach, until he decides to throw up the white flag and admit he has no experience working with electrical fixtures.

“Well, hell, kid.  Why didn’t you say something?”  Wyatt jerks his chin towards the barn.  “C’mon, I’ll show you.”

When at the rodeo, Rhett is tossed from the bull within seconds, a humiliating display.  Afterwards, his body bruised but his ego far worse off, Wyatt only chuckles at him, says life will throw you off like that sometimes and it’s the getting back up that shows character.

“You got back up,” he tells Rhett.  “That means something.”

“Means I didn’t want to get trampled,” he grumbles.

“Still means something.”

-----

Always, though, there’s the specter of you.

Wyatt catches the kid standing in the doorway of your bedroom sometimes still.  Peering in at the time capsule of your stuff:  the clothes you’ve left behind, the framed photos, the beat-to-shit stuffed bear on your bed. 

Wyatt mentions you in passing, but he never brings up that long-ago night at the hotel or your sudden flight from Wabang the summer before.  He guesses Rhett already feels terrible all the time, so why bother bringing it up and make it worse?

The kid eventually broaches the subject all on his own, just as winter descends on Wabang again.  It’s been over a year since either of them have seen you in person, though Wyatt Facetimes you at least once a week.

Rhett makes himself scarce during those calls, but Wyatt’s always had the impression he’s not far off, maybe straining to make out your voice through the wall.

In early December, you break the news that you aren’t coming home for the holiday break.  Wyatt would suspect that Rhett might be the reason, but your eyes practically glitter with excitement as you talk about a massive stray animal sweep you’ve helped plan, a Christmas-into-New Years take-to-the-streets movement to find and rescue as many street dogs and cats as you can.  You’ve been working with local Girl Scouts to build feral cat cold-weather shelters, and you’ve been raising money and donations, and you’ve built a strong foster network, and local clinics are ready to spay and neuter and administer vaccines—

Heart of gold, indeed.  It makes Wyatt tear up, first from so much pride it feels like his chest might burst, then from that knife edge of grief that his sister isn’t here to see what a force for good her daughter turned into.

When Wyatt breaks the news to Rhett later, though, the kid sorta deflates, and that’s when he brings it up himself.

“It’s my fault,” he mumbles.  “She’ll never come back if I’m here.”

“Not true.”  Wyatt goes to the refrigerator and snags two bottles of beer, then hands one off to Rhett.  He settles in his easy chair and studies the kid.  “You know she loves animals.  She’ll come back eventually.”

“She hates me.”

“Nah.  I don’t know if hate is something she can even feel.  Dislike, maybe.  Disappointment.  Not hate.” 

“She should hate me.  I deserve it.”

And then it spills out, one clipped sentence at a time.  The entire history of you two, from best friends in childhood to passing acquaintances to an awkward moment in a hotel that Wyatt now knows was not actual sex but just some fooling around that ended in a cruel words.  When Rhett gets to the part of the story about your summer together, Wyatt holds up a palm, says, “yeah, don’t want the details at all,” and Rhett slouches against the couch and sighs.

“I didn’t mean to hurt her, you know.  Sounds fucking stupid, but at the time, I didn’t even realize what I was doing to her.”  Rhett glances over at the man, fixes his eyes back on the floor.  “Looking back, it felt like I was sleepwalking through that summer, and now I’m awake and see all the damage I did.”

Wyatt chuckles sadly.  He knows the feeling.  He has his own hurt women in his past, experienced the same sort of heartless sleepwalking. 

The kid shakes his head and continues.  “Wasn’t worth it.  Maria, I mean.  I don’t even know what I saw in her. 

“You were thinking with the wrong brain,” he tells Rhett.  Wyatt may have no lost love for Maria Olivaries, but he’d admit she was a pretty gal.  He could see why the boys went a little stupid around her. 

“Wasn’t thinkin’ at all.”  He says your name, a sigh in his mouth, then adds, “I don’t know what to do.”

“Look.”  Wyatt sets his empty beer bottle aside, leans forward.  “You gotta try to make it right with her.  How you square it up is up to you.  Maybe she’ll forgive you, maybe she won’t, but you gotta make an honest try at it.”

“How?”

“Damned if I know.  But take it from me, kid.  I had a girl when I was your age, and I fucked it up completely.  Even once I realized how badly I fucked up, I was too proud to try and set it right.  Now it’s been years and it’s far too late.  So you gotta try, so even if she never forgives you, it’ll set right in your chest that you did everything you could.”

Rhett stares at him for a long beat, then nods.  Then there’s a beat of glassiness in his eyes, near-tears, that Rhett blinks away almost angrily before he turns and clears his throat.

“I don’t mean to, you know.  I don’t mean to be a piece of shit,” he says, his voice rough-edged.

“Aw hell, kid.”  Wyatt heaves himself out of his chair and starts to make his way back to the kitchen for another beer.  He stops in front of where Rhett sits, slouched over, and he lays a hand on his shoulder.

“I don’t think you’re a piece of shit,” he tells him.  “I just think you’re kind of a shithead.”

Rhett snorts.  “What’s the difference?”

“First one is a lost cause,” Wyatt says.  “Second one is just an idiot trying to do his best.  Like most of us.”

*****

Christmas day at a bachelor’s ranch is not as sad as it might seem.

Wyatt brings in a tree but they only throw some lights on it to give it a bit of cheer.  They build a fire in the fireplace, exchange no gifts, settle in and watch the football games.

Christmas dinner is a pot of Wyatt’s ulcer-inducing chili and a pan of cornbread.  Cecelia drops by in the morning with a plate of cookies and a handful of gifts for Rhett, but it’s just the two guys for most of the day.

Until you call to Facetime your uncle.

You take Rhett unawares; you call off-schedule.  You usually call in the evening but this is the afternoon, and Wyatt mutes the football game and take the call from the couch.  Rhett starts to stand up, but the man waves him to sit back down.  No need to hide out like he usually does.

So Rhett gets a full accounting of your life from you directly.  He can hear your voice, and you sound like you have a sore throat.  You tell your uncle about your big rescue mission, how it’s bitterly cold in the city but how you’ve saved so many dogs, so many cats, and how you can’t wait to head back out after you warm up a bit.

“I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas,” you tell Wyatt.  “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.”

Your uncle glances over at Rhett, nods in his direction.  “We’re doing okay for a couple of guys.”

“You decorate a tree?”

“Just string lights.”

“The prettiest part of a tree anyway.  What about dinner?”

“Chili.”

You laugh, and the sound makes Rhett smile – when was the last time he heard it? 

“Happy Birthday, Jesus.  Here’s some indigestion,” you joke.

“Good thing the kid went to Costco and got a gallon bucket of Pepto,” Wyatt jokes back.

It draws another laugh, which makes Rhett laugh, which makes you stop and ask your uncle if Rhett is there too.

“He is,” Wyatt admits.  “We’re watching the football game.”

There’s a beat of silence from you that seems to stretch out forever but is probably only a second or two. 

“Merry Christmas, Rhett,” you say, and Wyatt hesitates, then tilts the screen so Rhett can see you and you can see him.  He almost doesn’t want to look but he can’t help himself.

You’re smiling at him.  Not as broadly as you usually smile when you’re delighted in something or someone, but it’s a medium-sized one that touches the corners of your eyes. 

It’s genuine.

It’s a place to start.  It’s a sliver of hope.  It’s not a door slamming shut in his face but a door left ajar by a fraction, and maybe Rhett can toe it open if he can just find the right way to try and square things up with you.  It’s confirmation that he’s not a piece of shit, just kind of a shithead, and if he tries his best, maybe that will be enough.

“Merry Christmas,” he replies, and if you notice the gruffness in his voice, you don’t react.

“Thanks.” 

Wyatt holds his phone there a moment, starts to turn it back to him, but Rhett blurts out, “be careful out there, okay?” so Wyatt turns it back.

Your smile grows the barest bit.  “Will do.”  A pause.  “Don’t let my uncle work you too hard.”

A toe in the door.  A sliver of hope.  The fire snaps in the fireplace and the string lights twinkle on the tree, and Rhett may be an idiot just trying his best, but maybe that’s enough.

“I barely work at all,” he jokes.  “Gotta leave plenty of work for you when you come back.”

It makes you chuckle.  It’s not a laugh, but it’s something.

“In that case, Uncle Wyatt, work him into the ground,” you joke back, and Wyatt turns his phone back to him this time, and Rhett is left with perhaps a bit more than a sliver of hope.  He leans back on the couch and thinks that yes, maybe he can salvage this after all. 

Maybe trying his best will be enough.

[ricketycr1cks]

Mac is a Serial Killer part 2 where a murderer is on the loose that has been killing guys that look suspiciously like Dennis, so the gang decides to get Dennis to flirt with Mac in an attempt to get Mac to get close to killing him so they can catch him in the act.

[jahayla-parker]

ooooh, what about tom holland x reader where she's a huge fangirl for harry styles? maybe a smau?

British Civil War : Tom Holland x Reader (ft. Harry Styles)

Description: Smau, Y/n is a major fan of British singer Harry Styles, and it shows on her Instagram. However, her British actor boyfriend Tom Holland is ready to defend his position. Fluff

Warnings: flirting, playfulness, light teasing, shirtless Harry Styles and Tom Holland

liked by tomholland2013, hazosterfield, zendaya, and 6, 362, 916 others

yourusername: My tombstone shall read that I died tonight, from breathing the same air as @/harrystyles #loveontour #screaming

P.S. Dear Harry Styles, I adore you. 💕

view all 654,789 comments

hazosterfield: At least u died doing what you love 😜

yourusername: ooop 💀

tomholland2013: 🤨

nikkihollandphotography: looks like you had wonderful seats dear!

yourusername: @/yourbffusername and I definitely won’t be able to see him again from any other distance and be satisfied after tonight 🙌

tomholland2013: What’s this “again” about? 🧐

hollandfanatic17: not Tom fighting for his life here lmao

bananahanna24: please post your fit! Gotta see how you dressed up for tonight’s show!

yourusername: Don’t worry, my story is going to be spammed with more photos from tonight soon! 🤩

tomholland2013: glad u had a great night love xxx

yourusername: ty babe, I adore you almost as much as I adore Harry Styles 😘

tomholland2013: almost?!

liked by holland_maggie, yoursername, kristaholland4evr, and 1, 536, 975 others

british_boyfriends: I just read an article that said that @/yourusername’s celebrity crush is/was @/harrystyles and it got me thinking… they look pretty similar, no? #british #tomholland #harrystyles

view all 24,381 comments

yourusername: 😌 he is so pretty

british_boyfriends: screaming! You responded!!!

british_boyfriends: wait which boy? 👀

tomholland2013: not sure how I feel about this…

yourusername: ily 🥰

harryholland64: lmao this is great

yourusername: right? 😆

tomholland2013: 🙄

hollandfanatic17: omg the comments!!!!

liked by stylernikki, yourusername, harryswife1, and 8, 247, 916 others

harrystyles: Thank you for another incredible night! I’ve truly got the best fans!

view all 854,247 comments

styles1D: killed it again! 💚💛💜♥️💙

yourusername: omg he posted a photo of me 😍

harrystyles: @/yourusername lmao, ty for coming lovely, hope you had a good time

bananasforharry: omg dckkoufddjk he responded to @/yourusername

hazosterfield: I now understand why @/tomholland2013 is rolling his eyes while @/yourusername is grinning like a fool 🤣

hollandfan213: I’m dying, the way the Holland fandom has taken over this comment section is insane 😅

gina_2013_h: i keep waiting for @/tomholland2013 to comment about it lmao

liked by harryholland64, yoursername, hazosterfield, and 9, 744, 182 others

tomholland2013: Are puppies enough to bring you back to me? @/yourusername 🥺

view all 875,721 comments

hazosterfield: mate stoppp bahaha

nikkihollandphotography: Isn’t she home with you right now?

yourusername: yes 🙄 lol he’s just being dramatic

tomholland2013: @/yourusername am not

yourusername: I’m literally sitting next to you Holland 🤦‍♀️

tomholland2013: you know that’s not what I mean 💔

yourusername: oh shush, you know I love you 💕

tomholland2013: as much as Harry Styles?

tomholland2013: love? Why are you sneaking out of the room? 🧐

hollandfanatic17: ahhh I loved this interview!!!

harryholland64: bruv, he doesn’t even know who she is chill

yourusername: He posted a photo of him and I on his insta thank you very much 👏 😝

tomholland2013: irrelevant

liked by harryholland64, yourbffusername, zendaya, and 7, 619, 568 others

yourusername: It’s only been a couple of days, and I miss you 🎶

view all 885,302 comments

tomholland2013: I just wanna make you happier, baby

yourusername: quoting Harry Styles? 😍 ilysm

tomholland2013: @/yourusername anything for you darling, xxx

hazosterfield: ya caved mate 🤣

yln_holland_8: She went to another one of his shows?! Poor Tom is legit having to share her time with Harry now lmao

harryholland64: omg he so saw you girl 😱

yourusername: ikr?! And he clearly wanted a hug 🥹

harryholland64: I…. I can’t tell if you’re joining in on the sarcasm or not and that kinda scares me lol

hollandfanatic17: Can’t wait for @/tomholland2013 to petition for Spider-Man to fight Eros in the next Marvel movie now haha

liked by harryholland64, yourusername, hollandstyles22, and 362, 853 others

handsome.styles: Harry Styles x Spider-Man 🕸️ for the rest of LoT, I will be posting various fun Harry themed videos on my YouTube channel Handsome Styles. Today's video is Harry Styles showing off his on stage Catching Skills

view all 54,371 comments

harryholland64: @/yourusername

yourusername: 👀😍

tomholland2013: Really @/harryholland64?! 😠

holland4life: Girl do you even know what you just did with that AI photo? 🤣

handsome.styles: I didn’t tbh and was v confused when it blew up so much haha. But I’ve been caught up to speed now, ooops 😇

hollandfanatic17: which Spider-Man do we all think that @/yourusername would choose in a universe where they both exist?

styleswifey_: not you kicking up drama in the Holland fandom haha

hazosterfield: lmao y’all won’t let him catch a break huh?

liked by harryholland64, yourusername, hazosterfield, and 9, 764, 223 others

tomholland2013: training as I’ve found myself in the fight of my life

view all 754,931 comments

hazosterfield: this ought to help you catch up mate 💪

yourusername: holy sh- 🥵 T! 😍

tomholland2013: @/yourusername See something you like, darling? 😏

yourusername:@/tomholland2013 I… I’ve got no words

tuwaine: I think this means you won bruv @/tomholland2013, Harry’s never left her speechless 🏆

yourusername: is that what this post’s about? 🤦‍♀️

yourusername: If this is what comes of me fangirling for Harry Styles, I’m never going to stop cause 🥵🤤

tuwaine: eww I’m leaving this convo now 🫣

tomholland2013: I think this backfired….

holland_t_wife: hot damn 😱

zendaya: not you trying to compete with Harry Styles’s shirtless performances 🤣

liked by tomholland2013, tuwaine, zendaya, and 8,335,964 others

yourusername: Love on Tour with my love ❤️ @/tomholland2013

view all 534,789 comments

tomholland2013: ❤️

hazosterfield: Trying to indoctrinate him I see 😂

yourusername: He just needs to see the amazingness for himself 🤷‍♀️

zendaya: Is this like the 5th show you’ve attended for this tour? I love the dedication girl haha

yourusername: it might be 😇

tomholland2013: At least the 5th..

tuwaine: can’t believe you got him to go with you

hazosterfield: nah, he’d go anywhere with her

yourusername: @/hazosterfield 🥰

harryholland64: Haz is right, i can’t believe it took this long for him to go with her to make sure she stays his

tomholland2013: @/harryholland64 watch the implications mate, I trust her

yourusername: @/tomholland2013 💜

tuwaine: yeah @/harryholland64, it’s @/harrystyles he doesn’t trust 🤣

nikkihollandphotography: Hope you two had fun! ❤️

tomholland2013: I confess, I get it now 👏

yourusername: yay! @/tomholland2013 🥳😍

liked by tomholland2013, yoursername, holland_tom_13, and 764, 983 others

styles_holland: apologies for the grainy photo, I wasn’t expecting to see @/yourusername and @/tomholland2013 tonight at LoT 🤩

(also I somehow missed capturing the photo of them kissing while Harry was performing 😭)

view all 54,193 comments

hollandfanatic17: It might be ‘Harry’s House’, but @/yourusername seems fixated on a different British man 😌

yourusername: 🤷‍♀️🥰

th_marvelicious: ahhhh the way they’re right next to the stage but she’s only looking at Tom 😭

tstanleyh13: Get you someone who chooses you over Harry Styles like y/n did with Tom 👏👏👏

yourusername: forever my choice, everyday, always ☺️

thomaspidey: does this mean she’s done obsessing over @/harrystyles?

yourusername: No 😎

tomholland2013: lmao no, it just means I’ll be participating in the obsession

justafan13: Tom supporting y/n’s fangirling over Harry Styles was not on my bingo card but here we are 😂

hazosterfield: looks like it was Tom’s house tonight 💪

Taglist: @theslayerofthevampires @galaxyholland @bigbirdstwins @mcushvft @fishingirl12 @raajali3 @justapurrcat @natswifeysblog15 @directioner5life @ell0ra-br3kk3r @laylasbunbunny

Tom Holland Masterlist

Peter Parker / Spider-Man Masterlist

All My Works / My Main Masterlist Navigation

[vaile-elenya]

Look I may be completely wrong, I don't cliff jump into bodies of water on the regular so forgive me if I'm wrong, but how is Elrond not injured by the fall?? The pan down from the waterfall to the cliff made the cliff look incredibly high. Not to mention the possibility of rocks at the bottom of the waterfall. My first reaction to it was “YOU’RE GOING TO DIE!” (let’s pretend that we don't know he lives)

How afraid of Galadriel and Gil-galad was he to think that was his best option? Especially if he didn't know if he'd survive.

People do cliff jump for sport but the difference is how they land in the water. I don't know if Elrond is a seasoned cliff jumper because the surface tension could kill you. Yes, he is a half-elf but I don't gravity or the water cares that much.

Can someone smarter than me figure out how tall that cliff was and see if it was survivable? If it wasn't, then he really parallels Elwing, she didn't know that she'd survive. It was Ulmo that saved her. It was a suicide attempt to keep the silmaril away from Maedhors and Maglor.

If I am right about the cliff being high enough to kill him, then maybe Ulmo saves Elrond too. In my brief-as-hell research, Ulmo knew Eärendil’s father so maybe he's fond of the family. Ulmo is said to dwell in deep rivers, so it could be possible that he saved Elrond. What a parallel if I'm right

This is just a headcanon and massive speculation on my end, so I'd love to hear your thoughts. Like this me screaming at the sky type of headcanon, I’m not expecting to by right 😂

Ohhh, I had the same thought when Elrond made that jump! To me, it looked deadly. But what struck me the most was how the other Elves seemed so... unbothered? It might not be the perfect word to use here, but neither Galadriel nor Gil-galad seemed very concerned that Elrond might have been killed by that jump. I can’t tell if it's because they have this unwavering hope and goodness in their nature, or if they just knew the jump wasn’t as fatal as it appeared, but something about Gil-galad stationing guards at every crossing and Galadriel almost immediately assuming Elrond had gone somewhere else, rather than imagining him at the bottom of the ocean, makes me think the jump might not have been that dangerous—at least not for someone with Elven heritage 🤔

(Also, it did make me a little sad we didn’t get a moment where Gil-galad or Galadriel expressed concern, like “I hope he’s alright,” or even better, “We’ll deal with the rings after we find Elrond. First, let’s make sure he’s safe.” 💔)

But! With that said, I totally see the parallel to Elwing here. Elrond might know this waterfall by heart, but in a situation like this, you just can’t help but wonder if things might not go as smoothly as planned. I think you can see that fear on his face—his eyes show so much pain:

This is the look of someone painfully hurt, painfully scared, and painfully disappointed—knowing it's either give up the jewels or, possibly, face death. You can almost feel the pain of this realization in his expression, especially in the first two shots 💔

The moment we see Elrond from behind, with Gil-estel on his cloak, it feels like we're meant to draw a mental comparison to Elwing and the Silmarils. I can only imagine what that must have felt like for him 😭 I’m seriously tempted to write a fic exploring everything going through his mind in that moment. If this was a book, I'd want an entire chapter from Elrond's POV, just to know what he was thinking 😭

And! I love the idea of Ulmo saving Elrond!!! I was going to say that when I read your tags on my last answer. There’s something so beautiful about Ulmo quietly watching over Eärendil's family centuries later 🥺 It honestly makes so much sense!!!

[badlysummedupmoviestournament]

If you recognize the movies/characters hiding behind the decoy titles, please do not give identifying details about them in the notes.

Villain n°1: Duck-printed Pajamas

I was eating table scraps, trying to raise enough money to save my SO from being forced to marry a man she didn’t love. But I was too late, and the elite ripped her away from me. So I restructured. I pulled my resources together, and stumbled upon an ability that would help me to earn some additional funding. Using that, I built my own settlement, separate from the oppressive government that protected these corrupt elites. From there, I began working with the government to provide some funds in exchange for slowly draining their other resources. I had ways to recuperating my funds, so I was confident I could overpower them…until some random guys showed up. I gave them some money as a sign of good will, and they spent it all! They got into debt with me, and I gave them a way to pay it off, so naturally they decided the best way to pay it off was basically to work with one of my employees and hamper my ability of gather funding. I tried to fight back, but they beat me up and turned me to the government. Ironic, given they‘re some of the government’s most wanted criminals.

Villain n°2: Shark Fin Monopoly

I am just a mother who wants the best for my children. 🥺❤️ The man who took me in and raised me had begun exploiting my unusual appearance and abilities to impress a girl, and then he stopped feeding me and I had to convince him just to give me enough to eat. 😥💔 He had me murder his boss to avoid consequences for his actions, and then when I tried to ask his girlfriend to feed me, he tried to murder me with an axe! I put up a fight, but in the end I was killed when the building collapsed... Then he moved to the suburbs and everyone forgot about me. I didn't survive, but my children did, and they're going to change the world someday. 🌎🥰

[babybird-keigo]

Do any BNHA fans still play fortnite? 🥺 I have the Kirishima skin and I need people to play with 🙏 you don’t have to have a BNHA skin if you wanna play I’ll play with literally anyone 😭 fills are too annoying.

BYA (before you add):

I don’t have a mic 😔💔 but my headset works and I can hear your mic.

I am Australian so timezones may cause issues with play time and possibly internet connection.

Please let me know you’ve added me as I play fills a lot and sometimes get added, you can reply to the post or in dms with your user or the first three letters if you don’t wanna publicise it just so I don’t ignore your friend request thinking you’re a random ten year old.

I’m not a medallion fein so if you wanna get the medallion I will help but I don’t want any of the stuff 👍 or if we manage to kill someone with the medallion I do not want it.

I am also down to play reboot (though I’m not that good) or any creative games like murder mystery and stuff.

I can’t build to save my life💔 (literally)

I am down to do trios and/or squads if you wanna invite your friends to join, the more the merrier! 🤗

My user!

My Xbox account is: Gay4urdad8214 (Lara Croft pfp if you add on Xbox)

My epic account is: Theboywhofell

Typing either of those should pop up my profile

If this post gets enough attention I might make a server for BNHA/fortnite players just so we can all play together and meet new people (no toxic players😔🙏) could do VCs for no mic people

[majjiktricks]

Metal Gear!!

YIPPEEE TY FOR SENDING IT IN

Favorite character:

kazuhira miller my beloved

Least Favorite character:

oh man. i think most of the characters are pretty cool, or im at least neutral on. hm. even the awful evil villains i find really interesting. i guess i can collectively say the b&b corps? i thought they were just boring, overdramatic fanservice.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

❤️vkaz❤️ (venom snake/kaz miller)

otasune (solid snake/otacon)

solimiller (solid snake/kaz miller)

strangeboss (dr strangelove/the boss)

the insane mess that is bbvocelhira (big boss/venom snake/ocelot/kaz miller)

Character I find most attractive:

KAZ MILLER 😳 fucking. gender goals.

Character I would marry:

venom snake. or solid snake. both prime husband material ❤️

Character I would be best friends with:

otacon or mei-ling. i think we would get along very well :3 two very big nerds and also probably two of the sanest ppl in the series 😂

A random thought:

if you like mgs youll probably like no more heroes. begging more people to play them.

An unpopular opinion:

im not even sure this is an unpopular opinion but. i dont give a shit about the good queer rep/bad queer rep arguments. its a 30+ year old series with the majority of the games coming out before 2010. none of these characters are gonna be handled well. i still think the canon/subtextually queer characters are really interesting, even if they fall prey to stereotypes or the whole "queer-coded villain" thing (or in the case of metal gear where a not insignificant amount of the villains are explicitly queer)

or the ppl who get upset that ocelot HAS to be gay. why do you care. if someone wants to make him bi, let them. it doesnt hurt you. hes still queer either way.

My canon OTP:

i would argue otasune is basically canon. they adopted a daughter together.

if thats not good enough, then bbkaz 👍 awful awful couple and theyre so funny about it. they even had sex under a box on the beach.

Non-canon OTP:

vkaz. insane premise for a ship and i love it so much. what if i thought you were my lost love and you look and sound and act just like him but when i realize ive been tricked i vow to kill him (not you, just him). i love him and therefore i love you (i do.), i hate him and therefore i hate you (do i?).

Most badass character:

jetstream sam. guy does all that with no cybernetic enhancements (aside from the one arm he had to have replaced). (he wears a sort of power suit instead, whereas all his teammates are full on insane robot bodies. underneath his suit is mostly flesh and bone.)

Pairing I am not a fan of:

rairose. i just dont get it.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

ROSE AND NAOMI AND MERYL. they really dont know how to handle women 😭

Favourite friendship:

SUNNY AND RAIDEN 🥺🥺🥺

also raiden and blade wolf. very funny banter.

if the formatting is fucked up. im on mobile rn im sorry 💔

questions from here !!!

[pink-lemonadefairy]

Hi i forgot to put the 🐙 emoji in my last anon LOL but it’s 🐙!!! (Not sure if u do emoji anons on this acct :p) my favourite classics are honestly ANYTHING by kafka. I am a kafka girl. I love kafka. And then jane austen!! Pride and prejudice 💋💋mr. darcy is the only man ever actually i love when they’re QUIET (emphasis)

I’m pretty open to honestly most classic literature, i’ve been wanting to get some recommendations that aren’t the same authors. Sylvia plath unfortunately doesn’t really do it for me because I’m probably not her target audience but some of her poems/proses are good! I’m currently reading dracula/frankenstein (at the same time lol) and have been loving it so far. The only con about frankenstein is that i bought a tinier version so the words are huddled together and although my ass CAN read it i’d rather the words to be spaced out :-( not sure if it’s a me thing… i’ll just finish the book and see if i would get another version of frankenstein hehe

i also have a little life on hand rn, that is the book I’m especially putting on hold because from what i’ve seen people were Not okay when reading it. Idk about me tho personally i’m not an outwardly emotional person but i’m not heartless so i’ll read it when i can…

I have SOOO many books on my TBR list but i’ve been putting them on hold because i still have a number of books at home that i need to finish…! I wish i could show u a photo because it’s on my notes app lol. This might be a very unpopular opinion but i enjoyed reading murakami’s killing commendatore even though his descriptions of women r nasty. I read his books in a more factual (?) way? If that makes sense. If you have any book/author recommendations do tell me!! Especially female authors 🐙🤍

hi my love 💛 i’m so sorry for the late response :(

omg kafka!! 🥺 i haven’t read any of his works in full yet but i’ve read snippets on pinterest and they’re so so beautiful :( i love the way he writes. do you have any favourite works of his? :O oooh yes pride & prejudice!! the most classic of the classics i feel like lol. YES EXACTLY LOL, men when they’re quiet and don’t talk > 😌

i haven’t read any sylvia plath and tbh i’m not sure if i’d ever pick any of her works up because i’ve lots of bad things about them :( i’m glad you’re enjoying those books though!! :D frankenstein is really great!! >< i think they’re making a live action of it (?) which i’m super excited for !! and ik this isn’t dracula lol but i’m soooooo losing my mind over the new nosferatu movie coming out rahhhh!! it looks amazing :P I TOTALLY GET YOU!! the frankenstein i read in hs was similar and it was seriously a pain to get thru 😭 like why are the letters and words so close together 💔

oh god yeah a little life … ive heard it’s so heartbreaking :( i dont think i’ll be reading it anytime soon lol life is sad enough!! 😞 but people say it’s v well written ! good luck if you ever do get around to reading it 😭💗

ME TOO HELP ☹️ i love buying books but then my tbr just grows and grows and then i don’t even wanna read anymore rip. i definitely know what you mean dw! >< i think something a lot of people tend to forget is that we can (and are supposed to) be critical of authors works, esp those from back in the day! i think the problem is when it’s marketed as something it’s not & people say a work is flawless and perfect when it’s like…not, and even hurts groups of people, etc etc. idk if that makes sense lol but yeah! 😭

hmmm off the top of my head, since you like classics i’m thinking of virginia woolf, toni morrison, and maya angelou! for woolf, i read mrs dalloway (which i LOVED) and a room of ones own for a school assignment. i def recommend those! and for morrison, i read song of solomon which i also really, really loved. beloved by her is also on my list! for maya angelou id definitely recommend and still i rise and letter to my daughter <3 her poems are beautiful too!

i mostly read fiction / fantasy at the moment 😭 if you’re interested in those genres i can give you recs as well ><

[gaiamakesitshin]

I am bittersweet. I wanted more Teleya and Ed... Now it's all gone. I cried so much. I knew it was coming but still...😞💔😭. In s1 and 2 I was really attached to them. I got only fanfics now. It's impossible a redemption happens. I do not even want it now.

I think Kelly and Ed should rise Anaya together. I had rage waves and body contractions when I found out Teleya became a dictator. I wished she would have exploited the opportunity Ed gave her by releasing her, she should have been good... 

I was proud and fired up, in the moment, when Kelly stood up to Teleya. My thoughts were  ”Yes please,bring down that b*c*h.” I know, my thoughts were extreme and too much but that is how I felt at that moment. I am sorry we did not see any face off between Teleya and Kelly.

I was hit by Ed’s words “ I was stupid” “ I thought I knew her”. Teleya’s words also hit me in the stomach and left a deep scar: “ it was just an illusion” “you should get a girlfriend”

I then have a stupid and childish opinion: I would have liked to be stuck in that illusion forever, It’s better than losing something you care for, even if it’s ephemeral.” Anaya at least is the concrete fruit of that ephemeral love that will never come back. 

Ed shouldn’t take her back as a girlfriend, even if she does get redeemed. It hurts like hell to say but it would be the right thing. 

It killed me how Ed tried to make Teleya change her mind more than once. Ed’s interior conflict. 🥺

I wish I was able to create an edit or a drawing where Ed is on his knees, with his head a bit tilted but he still looks up to Teleya. She is very serious and icy. They are in her office on Krill. Sadly I can’t draw or edit. 

You can’t save them all, it’s the message I took from this episode: realistic but painful. 

The fact that Teleya spared Ed letting him go and that she hid their daughter... it’s not enough!

3x4

[lokisprettygirl]

How am I supposed to sleep tonight? 😳 what a cliffhanger, my Queen 👑!

I knew it. After Loki's return I tried to understand her behaviour but at least Priscilla is an (emotional) abuser, a traitor, a liar, she's awfully selfish...and I don't know what else. How DARE she talk like this to our precious Loki? She hates his Jotun form? She hates the lines on his beautyful skin? But he's good enough to fullfill her carnal desires?🤨 Why did she marry him? Just to be supplied? I don't think someone forced her to marry him. She's just using him. She's disgusting 😝😝😝. AND THEN SHE KISSED ANOTHER MAN ?? WTF !

I can't find any excuses for her behaviour. And Loki does everything for her even if he absolutely didn't want to do it. Just because he's so kindhearted and responsible. She is awful and doesn't deserve him. Fortunately Loki recognized what kind of person she is when she told him the lies about y/n. Little did she know how deep the love between Loki and y/n is and that they're inextricably linked.

Now I can rightly hate the next character 🤣👿🤬🔪🤣

Y/n got stuck deeply in the whole of loneliness and sadness. It's good that she has her friends and they're trying their very best to help her to keep going and not to lose herself. It's so heartbreaking. Loki and y/n want only the best for each other although they both know they belong together...and it's impossible (at the moment )😭💔

I can't wait to find out who that man is Priscilla was kissing. It could be Brutus and also he could be the man who betrayed Loki and handed him over to Rogass (like the Brutus in roman history betrayed and killed Julius Caesar).

A very good chapter again, my Lady 🌺 and...I love your new dividers between the paragraphs 😍😍😍

💚💙💔💚💙❤️‍🩹💙💚💔💙💚

She's horrible to him and he deserves more respect than that especially after what he has done for her. He sacrificed the love of his life to do what was right and that's how she repays him? Nahhh

Imagine not liking the way jotun loki looks 😭

Yeah she really thought her years of relationship would make him believe the lies she'd tell but he knows y/n and she was ready to get herself killed to save him from that chamber. She got under debt, she drove a week to get him home, He knew she'd never say something like that about him. He knows her 😭

We will find out more about the man and Brutus as well 👀 thank you my dear, glad you love them 🥺💚

[khaleesiofalicante]

Hej! Jag minns inte om jag gjorde det här språket tidigare, så jag kommer att behålla det💙💙

I dont want to read this, and at the same time i need it more that air!! Fjfjkbf too much:

The way Tessa, Catarina and Ragnor are there for him!!! I'm soft 🥺

I just-🥺 the way they give him their magic is just so pure and beautiful and sad💙💙

"His husband would feel the pain. He would feel it all. He would let it consume him. He would use it to keep moving." Boy if you knew...

Every time he refers to Rafael as baby or love, I die a little bit...

"I’m so sorry, my love. I cannot bring you back. I cannot do it." 😭😭 even tho he is right, it hurts.

“There is our Magnus.” THAT GANG IS SUPERIOR. Jduvdod that hug!!!

Alec🥺🥺 shit, I'm worrying...

The zoo!! Love them💙 and its killing me 💔

"His baby had been terrified, and Magnus hadn’t realized it. Because Magnus had been terrified too. Rafael. Come back. Come back to Bapak. I’m sorry. Come back." I'm fine. Just sobbing in my bed...but totally fine tho...

"Cause that’s how Alec loved. Alec loved Rafael so much that he would have changed the world for him." and thats the quote number 1073639 that ended me💔💔

“I don’t know, baby. I’ll tell you when I find out.” “That’s not going to happen for a long time,” Magnus said and put his head back on Alec’s shoulder. “Okay?” Alec kissed his hand again and put it on his chest. “Okay.” (I spy with my little eye.... A liar!!!)

Jace!!! Do call him out!! This is too much 🥺

"Have you told them yet?”  Wait, what??

They are going to send them to Idris?!?! What?!?!

Look, I get Lexi's anger, but hey!!!

Oh, shit. Right. Selena has Michael's secret...

"His daughter. His sun. His angel." "His daughter. His moon. His strength." "His son. His star. His heart." THE PARALLELS GOT ME 💙💙💙

YESS. HE LOVES YOU, OKEY??

“I named you after her so I would get another chance to love her,” Jace smiled. “So, however much you think I love you, just know that I love you twice as much.” Huh. This. This hits. Well played, Dani...

"Of course, the boy who would set the world on fire for the one he loved. Alec had changed the law for Magnus, and Rafael had broken it for Anjali."  OH SHIT ANOTHER PARALLEL!! 💙💜

"He knew what he had to do – no matter the cost. He started packing." Ah, shit. Here we go again...

A new dream??? Disappointed but not surprised

"David who was stuck somewhere. David who was reaching out to her for help." FUCK

All the talk about being the child of a hero was just🥺🥺 wow, just need them to be happy and know they are enough!!

BROTHER DAVID!! JACKSON!!

Lexi being the Herondale she is, just *chef kiss*

"But it is the name I have chosen for myself, for it is the name close to my heart." BRO🥺💙

“Angel Ithuriel is besties with my mom and sends her runes in her dreams." LMAOO😂

Oh shit, oneiromancy is serious... I remember Magnus was one of the few who could do it right? Yess, I knew it!!

The Herondale™ is strong on Lexi: "I have explicit orders from Brother Enoch not to high-five you." I screamed😂😂

"The boy who stood on the other side of the door was astoundingly good-looking. For a moment, Max almost forgot why he was there." :o

"He knew it was normal for shadowhunters to be good-looking, but this was some next-level shit." Shit, now I need a pic!!

"No. Waltzed. Waltzed away. Only humans walked. This was some ethereal bullshit." 😮😂 all I can say.

Gabriel!!! Love to see them here!! 😍

They bet 50 dollars!! Lmaooo

Mmm, they are suspicious....

“You are good, and so is your magic, mon ange,” David had said gently. “So, use it for good. Only good – and you’ll be okay.” (MON ANGE!!! Ouch, you open a wound😭)

“I let this happen once, but I won’t do it again,” Kit shook his head. “So, don’t make me.” (I mean... He is right!!)

Another thunderstorm....

Shit, what??? I'm confusion...

Summon Raziel!! No no no, bad idea!!!

Gabriel is NOT who I thought!!!

I feel obligarted to quote muy fav. things here:

“Yes, I am,” Gabriel nodded. “And I ain’t doing this shit for free.”

“Your brother is dead, papacito,”

“I’m a simple person, Max,” Gabriel said, their voice sweet as honey. “If you pay me the right price, I will do anything.”

Ngl, its kinda hot tho... I mean... You cant blame me!!!

Someone took Rafael!!! WTF THIS KEEPS GETTING WORSE!!

Wow, ok ok. I'm ok. That was a lot! To much trauma, not enough therapy... Anyways, I have a lot to process

Hejdå! Ses snart. Hoppas du mår bra! 💙

I'm going to say....German?

*googles translates the text*

OKAY IT WAS SWEDISH UGGGGHH

I will get it next time!!!!!

As always, your live blogging is so smart and funny and gives me LIFE.

A reminder that ily and thank you for supporting lbaf 💙

AND SORRY ABOUT THE TRAUMA OOP-

ps - you thirsting over Gabriel is funny but relatable kdjsbfksh.

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis Pt.1

Jimmy: You gonna go?

Janis: 🤔

Janis: On the one hand, do I wanna kms today

Janis: on the other, she blatantly doesn’t want me there so bad

Jimmy: 1. it ain’t at hers, might not be worth doing 2. it’s at Tammy’s so you could hack her tiktok and 💀💀💀 on a full stomach

Janis: 4. Well rude you ain’t invited when you wanna be Tam’s BFF so bad

Jimmy: it’s like they don’t even wanna get their insta engagement up!!! ❤️👍✔️ I’d get in them matching pink pjs

Janis: 🥺 when the group only needs one slag

Jimmy: You got time to train me in the race against Asia to see who gets lost on the way there first, or what?

Janis: Last I knew you needed no help in that regard but

Janis: I could go

Janis: if we 💭 of enough ways to fuck with them to make it worth how many braincells I’m gonna lose

Jimmy: finding #goals 🎄 jumpers ain’t the same as finding 🦍🌃 before her BFF remembers where it were, unless she’s still got her christmas decs up outside and they’re all 🌭🍩🍔🍭🍟🍦🍕 shaped

Janis: 🤞 keep the CG on side after your thievery

Jimmy: I get it, gotta craft myself a 🐩 costume with the leftover cotton wall balls before you’ll 🏃 with me

Janis: Would it kills you to put some effort in, babes 🙄

Jimmy: UGH fine 🙄🙄🙄

Janis: Fat, lazy, slag

Janis: leave SOMETHING for the rest of ‘em, honestly

Jimmy: leaving them that fringe, you heard

Janis: 😂

Janis: only in your baes, yeah

Jimmy: I reckon you should go

Jimmy: but if you're too knackered and 🙀🙀 she'll come at you with ✂️ when you 😴 I get that an' all

Janis: I ain’t scared

Janis: I’ll go

Janis: though you’re gonna be double behind now so are you 🙀🙀

Jimmy: Piss off am I

Janis: 🙀🙀 or behind?

Jimmy: neither obvs

Janis: you’ve got to get us out of detention and you ain’t gotta survive this sleepover so yeah you are

Jimmy: 1. I will do 2. I could do

Janis: 1. I know 2. I told you before you don’t pass like that, also they’ll probably notice a new gal so how?

Jimmy: got myself invited to friendmas, didn't I?

Jimmy: nowt challenging in convincing the rest fuck all else'd be a right laugh over chick flicks and face masks, just be #2

Janis: I don’t know what Tammy’s parents are like, I’ll ask Grace

Janis: might not just be #2 who wants a #lad free zone

Jimmy: might do til give other dickhead barista #lads a bell and bring them and ☕🍪🥪🥐🌯🥯🧁 round with me

Janis: like really shit strippers

Janis: That’s probably worth doing though

Janis: 💀👑 can’t afford no more trouble after xmas

Janis: Tam clearly reckons she LOVES it 😈

Jimmy: loads on rota with tiktok hair, have her dead keen and her keeper off scale FUMING, even if we don't have right long before her parents shut it down

Janis: I’ve 👀 your coworkers and the gals’ thirst in action, tah 🤢🤢

Janis: Gracie reckons they’re ‘normal strict’ whatever the fuck that means

Jimmy: just saying it don’t need to be #apronsonlyvibes to get the job done

Jimmy: and whatever bollocks Gracie reckons that means, it means I don’t give a shit about giving Hollie the trouble she’s after

Janis: Why you trying to give me nightmares when you know I ain’t slept

Janis: give a shit about Hollie is right

Janis: it’s a good idea, ain’t said otherwise

Jimmy: I give a shit you ain’t slept before I get this party sorted and started, lightweight, that’s why I were checking you’ll be in a state to keep up

Janis: Have you ever met me? Shut up, I’ll be fine

Janis: which ones are you gonna invite anyway

Jimmy: ❌ Pete DUH but whoever else replies and ain’t a lass, unless it’s a lass Ella’d fancy

Janis: Typical 😒😞

Janis: reckon she’s only got eyes/the hypothetical stamina for her 👑

Janis: 💔 we ain’t gonna get her to out herself though

Jimmy: Challenge accepted

Janis: you’re pretty off-putting, yeah 😏

Jimmy: so were her diary

Janis: puts our fake 😍🥰😘 to shame, really

Janis: why you’re 😤

Jimmy: *😭

Janis: must be true 💕

Janis: can’t argue with that

Jimmy: You sleep talking or what?

Janis: this lesson is fucking boring but no

Janis: you’re sleepy

Jimmy: you

Janis: Shh 😴 baby

Jimmy: getting well creative far as telling me to piss off goes

Janis: Use your 📖 as a pillow

Jimmy: you’re alright, ain’t the kind of #lad who needs to use bits of uniform for a ⚽️🥅 got no shortage of pillows

Janis: and you just love whipping off the layers for any excuse so

Janis: win win

Jimmy: 👍✔️

Jimmy: You not on the clock for 🏊‍♀️ tonight then or you gonna have to wait and have your pillow fight with the gals after?

Janis: 😱😱 how will they know what toppings I like on my 🍕?!

Jimmy: I’ll drop it in the groupchat for you, babe

Jimmy: but that weren’t why I were asking

Janis: Ah

Janis: you reckon I should sacrifice my workmates too?

Jimmy: wanted to know if you needed a hand with [insert relevant dog walking deets because he has her schedule from when she hurt her ankle] but letting them piss and shit all over 💀👑’s pity 😴 party is a better shout, crack on

Janis: nah, it’s alright, I just wanna take your dog to a 🥳 have ‘em back by 12 🚩🚩🚩

Jimmy: I’d let you

Janis: Yeah, poor Twix

Janis: don’t care if she gets her water bowl spiked or nothing

Jimmy: if it’s her or you, she can fall on the ✂️

Janis: Proper 💘 that

Jimmy: [obvs draw a doodle of Twix with the hair and then after you’ve sent that add Janis so they’re #twinning]

Janis: I hope you can turn these in as work for your art lessons, like

her 🤞🥺🤞 Jimmy: Hang on, I’ll@

Janis: I’m just saying, I’ll feel bad if I keep taking them

Jimmy: alright, I’ll put your proper one in the bin

Janis: Don’t

Jimmy: can’t have you feeling bad, you’re already SO tired

Janis: Maybe I am tired stop being mean, dickhead

Jimmy: poor baby

Jimmy: [but do give her whatever actual drawing of the day you’ve done ofc]

Janis: You take the piss for someone who kept me up all night

Jimmy: Bit rude to call my 🎨 a pisstake, took me ages, that

Janis: and you know that weren’t what I was saying

Jimmy: what I heard is you want me to put you to bed

Jimmy: come on then, I’ll walk you to your nan’s

Janis: We only just got back

Jimmy: and what?

Janis: and, idk

Janis: aren’t you tired too?

Jimmy: not gonna crash before I get you there if that’s why you’re asking, it ain’t that far, my dear

Janis: I’m asking if you’re gonna come sleep too

Jimmy: You know what our 🐕’s like

Janis: take her for a piss first, obviously

Jimmy: steady on, there’s a massive scale between not being too knackered to walk you home and knackering her enough she’ll let me go a kip

Janis: She can do fetch if you bring treats too, I know

Janis: and I meant I’d come with, obvs boy

Jimmy: stop pissing about and let’s go, girl

Janis: are we coming back for detention

Jimmy: What kind of question’s that?

Janis: A valid one, dickhead

Janis: it’s fun to fuck with him

Jimmy: there you go then, nap for a bit it is

Janis: It’s also detention so I thought I’d ask

Janis: you and your aversion to questions

Janis: I gone out [another gate you aren’t meant to that isn’t the front ‘cos always a thing]

Jimmy: Dunno what you mean

Jimmy: [and show up like 😏]

Janis: [can’t help but do it back even if we were trying to 🙄 for comedic effect]

Jimmy: [do the thing people do when they are trying to make a dog come to them like let’s go]

Janis: [gonna swing for you boy but not actually punch you properly tah]

Jimmy: [if you can’t playfight when you’re leaving school when can you lads]

Janis: [at least you don’t live far from this place lads]

Jimmy: [such a short walk but obvs during get the actual doodles you did out of your bag to give to her]

Janis: [just admiring as per, ‘how long’s it take you?’]

Jimmy: [imaginary watch time + a shrug because even if could answer a question he wouldn’t tell her cos he’s shy about it]

Janis: [‘Not saying it looks rushed’ in an lol kinda way ‘cos realizing that must’ve sounded like that but definitely not what we meant we’re still worried he’s wasting loads of time doing these daily doodles over here really]

Jimmy: [a look like what are you saying but not in a v shady way like we think she’s slagging us off here, though we clearly don’t ever think she’s really that impressed]

Janis: [when it sounds well dramatic to be like OMG YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO THESE FOR ME so you don’t wanna say that either so you’re like gah idk ‘just curious, haven’t done art since I was a kid’ not a lie]

Jimmy: [‘one of them dickheads’ in a pisstakey way meaning who don’t think graffiti is proper art because they’ve done loads together by now but we’re not elaborating]

Janis: [‘charming’ and bumping into him as you walk, like just calling me a dickhead ‘cos I ain’t an art hoe]

Jimmy: [an expression like excuse you but still pisstakey we’re not actually offended obviously]

Janis: [we all know it was a glorified feelsy lean honey]

Jimmy: [loves it, but obvs teach her some signs for getting people to get the fuck out of your way as if she’s just going about barging everyone lol]

Janis: [‘how’s that work then? People ignore you if you say ‘scuse me’ ‘cos tea good luck with that deaf people the world is oblivious]

Jimmy: [‘you tell me if you can get it to after you’ve let me deafen you’ like maybe it’ll work with other deaf people but our tone and expression is making it clear we doubt that]

Janis: [covers our ears like let you what?!]

Jimmy: [loling as we enter his gaff because it probably took a sec for this sign language lesson so we can say you’re there and heading to the kitchen to free poor Twix who’s shut in there ‘be chuffed you can’t hear this’ cos she wilding]

Janis: [swag in like the dog whisperer ‘cos you wanna be #impressive and helpful]

Jimmy: [cleaning up whatever carnage she’s already caused while you were at school because she’s just a bored baby with a look like gutted I’ve not blinded myself so I could pretend I don’t see this and then after gesturing like is there anything I can get for you before we go on this walk]

Janis: [just assessing the carnage like oh Twix ‘she’ll grow out of this’ which is true for some of it tbf ‘cos puppies are just puppies but we’re not downplaying how much Ian should not have got her for y’all with it, and shaking our heads ‘cos we’re good ‘barely just had breakfast’ 😏 like how many lessons did you even manage lads]

Jimmy: [‘not if it’s dead’ and chasing Twix like we’re gonna murder her which totally won’t help her be any less hyper but he’s a nerd so we care not and then helping himself to a biscuit like the fat bastard he is and as a throwback to last night obvs doing a 😁👍 vibe but mouth closed cos it’s very full since the whole biscuit do be in there]

Janis: [dramatically stepping in like I’ll save you from him hun, Twix is probably so feral now, getting her to sit and giving her her own biscuit ‘saving you from yourself’ in a proper Mia passive aggressive impression there as we look for her lead and whatnot, but we are v amused at you nerd]

Jimmy: [OTT dramatically horrified at the Mia impression like crossing himself and flicking water about like they did with the holy water at church etc but then obviously helping her sort all that stuff out and get ready because we’re effortlessly domestic together]

Janis: [obviously getting him back with whatever you have at your disposal like ‘I should’ve brought some incense’ like what a rookie error, get out and to this park before this dog pisses everywhere again]

Jimmy: [yes do go please lads, poor Twix, at least again it’s not remotely far, I vote for some kind of weather though be it rain or snow because a #mood frankly]

Janis: [Probably a rainy January day, because always, hope you got hoods, find a bench or somewhere you can wipe down ‘cos he didn’t wanna walk and set her up with this fetch treat system]

Jimmy: [you are both the type to actually have practical coats unlike the gals, but we can still do the ‘here’s some clothes of mine get out of your uniform and I’ll dry it for you’ cliche when you get back so]

Janis: [always appreciated yes but for now just being like ‘did you have a good shift?’ ‘cos in my mind we tried not to talk to him much when he left until now because we’re giving time and space]

Jimmy: [that was my vibe too like he blatantly could’ve talked to her because we know she was up but had the excuse of being busy so did not in case she likewise wanted a chance to get her head together after everything, but anyway, a look that’s the equivalent of what kind of question is that? because when has he ever had a good shift at the CG ‘you get your head down for a bit or what?’ cos we know it wouldn’t take her hours to get ready for school so she would’ve had time to kill]

Janis: [an OFFENDED look like ‘you’re holding out on the goss, with me?’ and shaking our head like how dare, as if that shift is anything but people on their way to work and opening up and we don’t know that ‘Libi wakes up at the crack of dawn’ like there’s your answer ‘cos we blatantly didn’t even if that isn’t all Libi really]

Jimmy: [after doing a feelsy lean of solidarity and there there style pats because annoying kids and being so hard done by because deprived of the good goss, obvs gotta make up a story about his manager but tell it like the style of a ghost story/urban legend because we’ve got the atmosphere and the long running joke that he’s a ghost too and Jimothy is a nerd]

Janis: [just loving that and acting like you’re ‘round a campfire with how hard you’re reacting ’this my bedtime story?’]

Jimmy: [‘it might do alright for the first’ because kids always want so many stories]

Janis: [‘can see why he needs you in with him now’ like I’m TERRIFIED rn]

Jimmy: [‘busted’ like he was doing it so they’d have to sleep together and snuggle, we’re joking but where’s the lie that he never wants you to go]

Janis: [closer to this 🤭 than this 😳 because likewise half-joking but also can’t fake all that]

Jimmy: [resting his head on her shoulder and closing his eyes like we’re going to sleep rn jk jk but also cos we just want to]

Janis: [stroking his hair in a way you would a baby but again you’re not not doing it now lol]

Jimmy: [a happy sigh we can’t help]

Janis: [‘I’m not setting an alarm’ mostly to ourselves but still out loud like idc if we miss detention you need to sleep boy]

Jimmy: [‘you never answered me’ + a yawn as we finish saying it like do you have work and do you have dogs that need walking while you’re there if the answer is yes, also just kind of thinking/worrying aloud but]

Janis: [‘What?’ ‘cos that was ages ago boy what]

Jimmy: [‘about either of your 2 jobs’ still not that helpful boy but okay]

Janis: [you can be with it enough to connect that though like ohh, ‘yeah I did, said I wouldn’t be there for tea’ like remember the pizza and nudging him ‘at the pool’ like that doesn’t feel awkward at all mentioning that]

Jimmy: [‘weren’t all I asked though’ like do you need my help walking these dogs or not gal because we wanna help always and also obvs feel bad that we’ve put her in this position even though you didn’t tell her to pick a lad from work who happens to look like you but still]

Janis: [just shaking our head like nah ‘you can chill out’ pausing for a beat ‘and I can handle my own shit anyway’]

Jimmy: [shaking his own head because 1. No he can’t ever there’s always a million being a mother and housewife tasks to do and 2. That doesn’t seem very fair when she also has to go to this sleepover without him for however long before he turns up, moving so he can properly look at her get that not at all dangerous eye contact going on ‘I know you can, dickhead’ but in a softer tone than those words suggest, SUCH an unspoken ‘but you don’t have to’ happening with this everything rn]

Janis: [just shrugging like well, I tried and the fact still remains either way, and forcing ourselves to maintain this eye contact even though we don’t want to, before getting up from the bench to do a better throw of this ball ‘didn’t need you before, and I’m not gonna rely on you now to screw myself over after’]

Jimmy: ['not gonna fuck up your other ankle to have another go at proving a point' and a shrug like fine have it your way babe even though we are supposed to be a team, and lighting a cigarette that we have to shield against the rain but none for you since you don't need us]

Janis: [a petty move we love to see it, well we do but she does not lmao just like really 🙄 and walking progressively further away to throw this ball even harder get you a workout Twix]

Jimmy: [letting her go for once because we're not that much of a dick we are gonna start a full confrontation and also we are both tired]

Janis: [this is his dog though so you can’t just take it and leave, do this ‘til she’s sufficiently worn out then just drop her at his feet basically like done]

Jimmy: [when you're literally about to walk away and leave it up to her if she comes or not but you remember the lunch room moment so you obvs don't wanna repeat that mistake 'you coming or what?']

Janis: [genuinely really pondering that like do you just want to go to your nans, or go do something to be stubborn and not sleep to piss him off or what but then deciding ‘may as well give her more attention’ like if you’re gonna be gone tonight better make sure she’s all sorted]

Jimmy: [walking now cos he’s buzzing but we don’t need to let her know that]

Janis: [just walk and chill out, just showing he isn’t the only one who can pull back and have doubts here because true and we know we’re already in too deep and it’s going to be shit again when you leave, s’not happening babe but you don’t know that; anyway, after a while being like ‘you gonna give me that cigarette you owe me?’]

Jimmy: [I love to see it because very legit, but anyway, Jimothy obviously stopping her so we can put a cigarette in her mouth and lighting it and that whole hot charade instead of just passing it to her lit or worse passing it to her and making her light it herself in the pettiest way ever because he gets it and it will be shit when he leaves as he’s still in the period when he thinks that’s gonna happen too]

Janis: [such a thinly-veiled LOOK ‘cos can’t help it regardless and fuck it ‘thanks’ when we exhale to just prolong the moment]

Jimmy: [always gotta return the look and likewise can’t help but make it into more of one than she did because the feelings are still there honey]

Janis: [‘fuck’s sake’ under our breath but in a 😏 way not fuming]

Jimmy: [pull her along like come on why have we stopped it’s literally still raining but in an equally playful way]

Janis: [‘thought you was meant to be well hard’ like Northern whomst, trying to run from this rain, but obvs getting a razz on like let’s go girls]

Jimmy: [looking round like Ian is that you? But we’re not making the point hard enough to actually stop because she’s already getting a razz on and so is Twix and we don’t wanna get left]

Janis: [get inside huns, dry Twix off like she’s a big baby]

Jimmy: [I like to think they’re doing it together because that coupley and domestic and he’s being too much of a soft nerd for how much we act like he hates this dog lol]

Janis: [literally swaddling this dog like nbd, she loves it ofc because is baby yes yes]

Jimmy: [also make the bae a cup of tea because it’s your turn boy but also make Twix one because my mum used to make Tyson and Bruno tea and toast and honestly that’s your energy]

Janis: [we love that, it’s very cute, just be drying your hair but not on Twix’s towel lmao, probably using your jumper or something]

Jimmy: [see that and obvs go get her a towel and dry clothes like SO soz we gotta wait for the rain to stop before I can walk you this REALLY long distance to mcvickers house so I’ll obvs dry your uniform for you xoxo nbd, throwing the clothes at you but coming at you with the towel because if we don’t dry your hair for you who are we]

Janis: [just getting changed in front of you ‘cos we’re such #mates but also blatantly to silently test that soz but not, and giving him a Gracie style #tutorial on how to deal with afro/curly hair here]

Jimmy: [there’s no world in which he’s not just FULLY watching her do that even though looking away would be the polite thing to do or we could easily pretend to busy ourselves with something but we don’t because we aren’t embarrassed and we never will be, likewise not remotely considering putting on dry clothes ourselves until we’ve dried the bae’s hair because priorities]

Janis: [gotta front this out too obviously, so I like to think you’d only got the top of whatever he gave you on before he started doing your hair so that’s how you’re chilling right now]

Jimmy: [it’s totally fine and casual]

Janis: [not at all checking you out]

Jimmy: [going to the window like it’s still raining babe and checking the imaginary watch again ‘you wanna just kip here an’ all?]

Janis: [‘sofa?’ like that’s probably your best bet and nodding like yeah, ‘cos it does not matter ‘cos we would’ve been like you wanna come with anyway]

Jimmy: [going and sorting that like getting pillows and blankets and stuff]

Janis: [trying to get Twix in a sleepy mood by giving her some chill fuss like bedtime bitch]

Jimmy: [just loitering because you don’t know if she wants you to sleep here too or go upstairs to your bed and you don’t wanna ask]

Janis: [just looking up at him like ? and then patting the sofa, whilst we’re sat on the floor next to Twix’s bed, like go on then]

Jimmy: [do go on boy and get comfy]

Janis: [just chill here for a bit like so casual but you can’t sit there the whole time obvs so then try and situate yourself in a totes casual and chill way]

Jimmy: [even though his eyes are closed and he’s probably half asleep we can feel you faffing about gal so a quiet soft amused sound and saying ‘come here’ in the same kinda tone]

Janis: [signing something sweary at his closed eyes like testing how that works rn but actually getting in and getting comfy ‘how here?’ like how close do you want to be]

Jimmy: [‘you heard’ when she sasses him because he’s like one of those mum’s who have eyes in the back of their head and just know, but we’re obvs amused and obvs happy when she does get in and comfy and equally as obvs pulling her close to us how we always do in answer to that question]

Janis: [😒 but in a jokey way obviously ‘you’re not a fair test subject’ like you got that deaf sixth sense, a lull in our joking as we just stop breathing for a beat there before acting like it didn’t happen, but not because we’re obviously whispering now because no need to talk any louder with no space between you ‘gonna have to try it out on the general public, like’ just swearing at everyone like move bitch]

Jimmy: [‘you’ll have your hands full if some dickhead’s drowning’ which is as close as we’ll come to acknowledging the awks at her workplace and our jealousy about this boy rn because we’re basically saying please don’t be better mates with him than you are with me without saying it]

Janis: [‘hands busy’ you mean with the signing at them whilst they drown but doesn’t sound any better actually lmao but you didn’t get the hint, or are ignoring it]

Jimmy: [likewise ignoring that as we silently lie here wishing we could say a million things that I won’t let you]

Janis: [big sigh ‘I know it weren’t a good idea but-’ but what, we don’t know how to put it into words]

Jimmy: [‘it weren’t yours’ as if we’re finishing the sentence because he blames himself and obvs thinks she also blames him]

Janis: [‘picking him was’]

Jimmy: [‘didn’t give you chance to have proper auditions’ because we know damn well you had to do it then and couldn’t hang around so]

Janis: [a noise like yeah well, because you can’t really say anything to that]

Jimmy: [moving about like we’re settling down to sleep because likewise]

Janis: [‘it didn’t work though so’ in a what more can I do tone]

Jimmy: [‘am I a shit mate if I can’t fake an apology for that bit?’ because we’re really not soz you didn’t fall in love with our lookalike]

Janis: [an amused noise like no, obviously not]

Jimmy: [‘alright then’ confirming again how not soz we are in a way we absolutely did not need to]

Janis: [‘we don’t get to be jealous, do we?’ fully asking, not rhetorical even if we can make it sound it]

Jimmy: [‘of what?’ meaning there’s nothing to be jealous of both our dates were clearly shit but we’re keeping it deliberately vague just in case here]

Janis: [‘what do you reckon’ ‘cos two can play at this game lol]

Jimmy: [‘what do you?’ because 1. You asked but also 2. What are you jealous about 3. Are you jealous lol]

Janis: [nudge him under these covers like oi]

Jimmy: [depending what spooning position y’all are lying in, either move her or you so that you’re facing each other and you can look at her like answer me then because we’re dying to know how jealous she is]

Janis: [😳 but you’ve got to answer now obviously ‘of her. Them.’]

Jimmy: [‘I don’t reckon you’ve got owt to be jealous of there’ because true in every sense]

Janis: [‘do I or don’t I’ like get specific]

Jimmy: [‘you don’t, I just said’ like are you really gonna make me spell it out rn lol]

Janis: [‘you make me say everything else the rest of the time’ like it won’t kill you]

Jimmy: [‘she’s nowt and you’re-’ stopping because it will kill him to literally say you’re everything]

Janis: [‘you’ with everything we got right now ‘cos mean it]

Jimmy: [‘you’ likewise and we’re honestly lucky it’s an actual word and not just fully a noise by the end of it cos how much we wanna kiss her rn]

Janis: [‘I wish you wanted-’ like we all know what but shh]

Jimmy: [‘I do want-’ we’re not gonna lie to you girl and we clearly do want to]

Janis: [can’t literally have you say BUT NOW like a brat so just 🥺 instead]

Jimmy: [run your thumb over her bottom lip how you always do, it’s not gonna help at all but we can’t help ourselves]

Janis: [noise soz can’t not]

Jimmy: [we know the drill if you make a noise you get one back]

Janis: [‘stop it’ in a kinda aggressive way but like saucy aggressive lol]

Jimmy: [‘you’ but v much in a tone that’s like don’t stop it though]

Janis: [‘you can’t make me’ with all the challenge emphasised obvs]

Jimmy: [can’t ever back down from a challenge so gotta just touch her a saucy way and pretend like this isn’t totally crossing a line, there’s simply nothing I can do about it]

Janis: [my boo says sorry there’s no logical cockblock here, at least you can try not to touch him for a fun lil challenge here]

Jimmy: [you two love things like that and yes, then it’s obviously TOTALLY FINE that makes sense except not at all boy and we all know it]

Janis: [obviously got to make all the noise to show he can’t shut you up, totally fine]

Jimmy: [as fine and casual as when he ends up touching himself because she’s not doing it even though she’s literally right there 👀 like a ramped up version of when you were both undressing in front of each other]

Janis: [literally going to feel how that affects us so there’s that, and we are fully just 👀 you because we’re trying so hard not to ‘lose’]

Jimmy: [so soz to you gal, I am very evil]

Janis: [‘I hate you’ because yes]

Jimmy: [saying 'don't' but not clarifying if we mean please don't hate me or no you don't because either way he's doing THE MOST with touching her again and using his other hand not to shhh her because obvs 1. we've forgotten about ourselves and 2. love the reaction when we are giving it our all to give the bae all the orgasms she deserves so using it to touch her throat and feel these noises as they happen too almost like we would if we were deaf]

Janis: [The way we are DYING right now, like truly, ‘please let me touch you’ ‘cos we gotta]

Jimmy: [SO much soz to Twix who he has totally forgotten is in here and snoozing for how loud you both are being rn, ofc you gotta let her touch you now because we've held out for ages and it has clearly got past the point where we are thinking about the bullshit that was stopping us, so put her hand there like okay cos what are words atm]

Janis: [she must’ve legit zonked ‘cos like, soz girl we don’t have time for you right now, we are way too into this and each other and we’d just have to shut you out]

Jimmy: [you two are blatantly gonna crash that hard when you're done here, very #relatable of you Twix]

Janis: [I do vote that you actually just wake up for your shift ‘cos necessary]

Jimmy: [yeah I vote the kids wake you when they back from school because that won't be awkward and Cass won't be livid at all haha]

Janis: [awkward much, go put your uniform on in casual disgrace haha, soz children]

Jimmy: [I picture the scene like Cass having a go at Jimothy immediately before he’s even properly woken up because she picked Bobby up cos he’s meant to be in detention and Jimmy being like it won’t kill you because tbh it won’t hun to do a bit more meanwhile Bobby’s just signing at Janis like hey asking her if she’s ill because that’s when he snoozes on the sofa in a blanket and he’s 1. An adorable babe and 2. Like I saw Libi at lunch and she wasn’t ill I hope she doesn’t catch it, poor Janis just like ? because y’all are too busy having a little row to translate, all before anyone’s had a chance to move lol]

Janis: [trying our hardest to pick up what we can, because sometimes you can guesstimate but some of it no clue so you’re like um so soz bub, signing drink and snack because I reckon you could have those down so you can take him through to the kitchen and distract him because kids love an after school snack]

Jimmy: [none for you Cass cos you’re doing your brother’s head in and it’d get to the point where he’d be like piss off and take this bloody dog for another walk because obvs doesn’t want this to escalate any more than it is, especially when the bae is here to witness how out of control she can actually be]

Janis: [at least you’ve got this child situated and tried to do sign 101 with him best you can before you awkwardly gotta peace]

Jimmy: [such fun cos you know Cass is fully shading Janis like she better not still be here when I get back and poor Jimothy is just like oi she’s not deaf because she can blatantly hear you gal which is 100% why you did it, there’s drama in the gaff]

Janis: [we know you’ve said worse to many a person and we ain’t gonna fight you ‘cos you’re a kid, soz babe lol]

Jimmy: [at least when she storms out with Twix he can awkwardly come through like hey my two besties how are we, just signing at you both asking if you’re alright]

Janis: [being like he was saying something about Libi ‘cos you don’t wanna ignore Bobby just ‘cos you can’t understand him yet like ask for that translation now]

Jimmy: [a pisstakey but not shady eyeroll like of course he was cos they’re so in love, but obvs we gonna get that info and tell her what’s up but add a bit about how you’ve told him she’s all better now whether you actually did say that or not cos we gotta make reference to that sauciness earlier even though we could literally just not sir]

Janis: [not knowing whether to curl up and die or fully cackle like OH but keeping our composure really and just looking at Jimothy like did you really just]

Jimmy: [he’s just there like 😏 + 😉 energy]

Janis: [thank God you have somewhere you definitely have to be bitch]

Jimmy: [gonna give you the longest ever hug when you leave because it might be awkward at work and also we love and will miss you]

Janis: [going to let it be okay but yeah like for a bit here, just like why did I do that lmao]

Jimmy: [Bobby signing bye and whatever his adorable sign name for you is gal because he likes you too, soz Cass you’re really outnumbered here]

Janis: [when you realize she’s not his ex 2.0 and your situation gets better, you’ll get over it, the pool is probably near the school kinda vibes so not far to go but still posting the #goals art and such on this walk]

Jimmy: [cue an extra post about how much he misses her that’s not at all fake]

Janis: 🏆

Jimmy: It’ll be a 🥇 when you see the 🎨 #content our kid’s cracking on with now he’s heard about your new job

Jimmy: [post on your story for everyone to see this child making a congrats card but with no spoilers of the end result]

Janis: [he’s such a cutie tbh]

Janis: You should bring him here when you’ve got time

Janis: can he swim yet?

Jimmy: 💔 it’s a bit short notice to ask his missus if she fancies it an’ all, could’ve brought you this masterpiece himself when it’s done and her 🔊 for the hip hip hoorays 🥳🥳🥳

Janis: Have to be a hero with a 💔 from that lack of applause

Janis: kids get in cheap [probably Saturday mornings I imagine]

Jimmy: 🤞 it’s a date for them ASAP

Jimmy: he’s 🤏🙀 but he’ll wanna impress her obvs

Janis: The feeling’s mutual so she already thinks he’s dead impressive

Janis: How long am I gonna have to suffer the sleepover before we can sabotage do you reckon

Jimmy: Up to you that

Jimmy: I’m all yours once he’s in bed

Janis: I better 👀

Janis: get them hyped

Janis: the ones I can, anyway

Jimmy: I’m still trying to scroll past all the bollocks we 😴 through

Janis: you’ll fall asleep again

Janis: they 💬 so much shit all the time

Jimmy: our kid’s not having that, needs as much attention as you, him 🥺🏆

Janis: go get ½ your big brother 🥇

Jimmy: 👍✔️

Janis: tell you when I get to Tam’s

Jimmy: in a bit then, Jade

Janis: 👍✔️

Jimmy: have a good shift

Janis: can’t count casualties as easy as 🐄💩s but should still be alright

Jimmy: should be easier to count if owt, athlete like you

Jimmy: you forgot you’re not meant to be on a killing spree?

Janis: oh that’s right

Janis: bummer

Jimmy: hang in there, baby

Jimmy: bloodbath starts at Tam’s

Janis: 🧛‍♀️💕

Janis: I could float the idea

Janis: if you don’t reckon it’ll be weird

Jimmy: I were thinking more like 🔪🔪

Jimmy: but I get it, you need her blood sugar levels to stop yourself crashing, I should’ve fed you before you pissed off

Janis: Ugh, no, that weren’t what I meant 🤦‍♀️

Janis: I meant seeing if my coworkers will crash and bring their mates too

Janis: get numbers up without blatantly leaking her address

Jimmy: 🥇💡

Janis: just tell ‘em the deal so they don’t think I’m shit craic

Jimmy: Yeah

Janis: or not

Janis: just an 💭

Jimmy: you had me at lads in 🩳 mate

Janis: ❌ going home and getting changed, lads

Janis: there is another girl, what about her?

Jimmy: can’t really leave her out, can you?

Janis: I meant she might wanna get changed 👗💄💅💃

Jimmy: so chuck her at Gracie, that’ll have her on side quicker than owt and means I get to go without french tips

Janis: you taking notes from her or what

Jimmy: ?

Janis: before she joined the cult

Janis: we had to share mates like everything else 🙄

Jimmy: soz, didn’t realise she were your new best mate an’ all

Janis: She weren’t on my first shift so no, I ain’t met her before

Jimmy: Alright

Janis: Yeah, it is

Jimmy: sacrifice who you want and leave it out with the dickheads who you don’t, nowt to do with me

Janis: I won’t invite him it’s alright

Janis: I just wanted to do something too

Jimmy: What are you on about?

Jimmy: you’re doing loads, it’s me who’s just turning up for the proper fun bit

Janis: they’ll be 😁😁😁😁😁 to hear that from you

Jimmy: it’s a 🥇💡 I said

Janis: there’s other people I can@

Jimmy: there’s no need

Janis: you wanna fuck this up or not

Janis: as many random associates as possible, boy

Jimmy: it were you saying you didn’t want her address leaked

Jimmy: make up your mind, girl

Janis: like I ain’t gonna leak it for every party person in dubo

Janis: still trying to wreck their shit

Jimmy: I got that when we 🗨️ about it before

Janis: what you 💬 now then?

Jimmy: just admit you don’t wanna look like a 😍💘 twat in front of your new co-workers

Janis: I meant I don’t want them to think I’m inviting them to a sleepover with the gals

Janis: I don’t care about that

Jimmy: Okay, tell them to come after I’ve got the CG dickheads there and it won’t be a sleepover no more

Janis: Yeah I know

Janis: why’s it weird I don’t want them to think I’m ☕️💅💄👗😘

Jimmy: I never said it were

Janis: You implied it

Jimmy: when did I?

Janis: Saying I was embarrassed by 😍💘

Jimmy: What else you not inviting him for?

Janis: For your sake

Jimmy: piss off is it

Jimmy: *for yours

Janis: It ain’t

Jimmy: one of us is embarrassed at the idea of having him about and it ain’t me

Janis: I’m not embarrassed

Janis: I thought it might be awkward, that’s it

Jimmy: you said he agreed to being just mates, shouldn’t be for him unless that were bollocks

Janis: Quite a quick turnaround, nah, might be nice if I gave him longer to get his head sorted with it

Jimmy: crack on being nice to him then

Janis: fuck’s sake

Janis: I already look like ☕️💅💄👗😘 ‘cos I had to say I asked him out on a rebound

Janis: How else do you think I was explaining my hitting him up immediately and binning him off 10 seconds later

Jimmy: I don’t 💭 about him, he ain’t my mate or rebound

Janis: Oh whatever then

Janis: you’re being a twat

Jimmy: How am I?

Jimmy: you were bothered about them not seeing you as one of the #gals and I gave you a way round it

Janis: Wow, thanks

Jimmy: I can’t do nowt else

Jimmy: I can’t fucking undo it

Janis: neither can I

Jimmy: I’m not asking you to

Janis: I’m not saying it for you, it’s done now and there’s nothing wrong with trying to do damage control

Jimmy: I’m not stopping you either

Janis: Fine

Jimmy: 👍

Janis: You don’t have to get pissy just ‘cos I asked if it’d be alright

Jimmy: You don’t have to bang on like you’re doing bollocks for my sake when it’s for yours and his

Janis: I care if you want him there or not

Jimmy: nah, you want me to care if he’s there or not

Jimmy: but as it’s a houseparty and I weren’t planning on doing body shots off him, I’ll live

Janis: Bullshit

Janis: I actually give a shit but fuck that now

Jimmy: Why would I give a shit if he’s there or not?

Janis: You tell me

Jimmy: you told me you don’t want him

Janis: It could still be something you don’t wanna deal with

Jimmy: and what, I REALLY wanna deal with 💀👑 and her mates?

Janis: don’t need to doubledown on the shit

Jimmy: stop being a dickhead

Janis: I’m not

Jimmy: I can do it

Janis: Okay then

Jimmy: just

Janis: just tell me

Jimmy: Don’t get loads more mates til after I’ve gone, making me look right ungoals on my own

Janis: I haven’t got any more mates

Janis: I just work with them

Jimmy: yeah, you work with them and you ain’t spending the shift thinking of ways you could frame them for your killing spree, that’s 🤝 and your fave emoji 🤗🤗 shit

Janis: Fuck off is it

Janis: I’ve met them a few times, if it don’t have to be 😣😖😫😩🥺😢😭😤😠😡🤬🤯 then I’ll take it

Janis: don’t mean nothing

Jimmy: means nowt but you’re SO bothered what they 💭

Janis: I don’t want anyone 💭 I’m anything like my sister, that’s not news

Jimmy: You couldn’t be ☕️💅💄👗😘 if your life depended on it

Jimmy: you’re too

Jimmy: so leave it out

Janis: You’re my only mate

Janis: don’t be jealous

Jimmy: that ain’t very nice to my lifeguard lad clone, is it?

Janis: He’ll survive

Jimmy: He better had do, I can’t have him hanging about as a 👻 an’ all

Janis: I don’t care about him

Janis: not like that

Jimmy: I know

Janis: so stop being a dickhead

Jimmy: It ain’t 📰 either that I am

Janis: you were being nice earlier

Jimmy: I never said I were an utter bastard, Judith

Jimmy: you needed it earlier

Janis: how’d you work that out

Jimmy: you gave me a few clues, like

Janis: 👍

Jimmy: that your review then?

Janis: of you ✔️ me off your to-do list again

Janis: sure, we’ll go with that

Jimmy: Come on, you know that’s not what it’s like

Janis: what you just said

Janis: we’re done playing nice now, that’s fine

Jimmy: but not what I meant

Janis: I heard what you said

Janis: forget about it

Jimmy: Shut up, no you never

Jimmy: I’m just not gonna be the kind of dickhead distracting you at your new job, alright

Jimmy: I’ve already 🗨️❌🤝🤗

Janis: Like I do you, all the time

Janis: alright

Janis: have to turn my phone off soon anyway, I’ll be main

Jimmy: that’s different

Janis: it’s not always fake shit

Jimmy: it’s different ‘cause I hate mine

Janis: Give me a chance, like

Jimmy: I don’t want to fuck this up for you

Janis: Like you could

Jimmy: I nearly did 🤏

Janis: Not really

Janis: I could’ve blueballed him on my own time, it’s not important why

Jimmy: Alright, forget I 🗨️ owt about it

Janis: ‘Course

Jimmy: 🤐

Janis: Business as usual then

Jimmy: *😎🚬

Janis: If you like, babe

Jimmy: I can’t help what business as usual means, you’ll have to take it up with another 👻 if you’re mardy

Janis: I know the deal by now

Jimmy: me an’ all, don’t worry

Janis: If we all know where we stand does that mean we’re done here?

Janis: 👍 thanks

Jimmy: Fuck's sake

Jimmy: can't win with you since you pissed off from here

Janis: I’d quit trying if that’s been what you’ve been doing

Janis: I’ll just see you at the party

Jimmy: 👌

Janis: [Oh lads, better skip then]

Janis: [photo of Hollie’s house like going in]

Jimmy: 👍

Janis: give you directions before you need to come, don’t worry

Jimmy: I weren't, could literally ask Asia and she'd never work out why, but tah

Janis: I get it, you don’t wanna be here

Janis: pick a less obvious excuse than trusting Asia with fuck all

Jimmy: if I were that bothered I wouldn’t come

Janis: alright, if you wanna act like it’s that simple

Jimmy: that bit is, I don’t do nowt I don’t want

your besties with that compliment Janis: okay@

Jimmy: [something in the group chat that has the energy of miss y’all and hope you are having a good night ladies]

Janis: [make them take a group selfie ‘cos Mia and Ella will be fuming and that’ll be amusing for us all]

Jimmy: [obvs hardcore complimenting the bae but slagging the rest of you off really subtly so it still sounds like a compliment because you two are both great at that]

Janis: [#sobrave]

Jimmy: [we love it]

Jimmy: 😁?

Janis: Too busy 😍 at Asia to see my face or what

Jimmy: It’s the 🦷🦷 whitening strips in fairness, been blinded

Janis: gotta double up on the front ones

Janis: dead pricey so she’ll be buzzing it’s working

her many 🌟✨ as the limit allows Jimmy: hang on, I’ll@

Janis: Crack on, loverboy

Jimmy: 💕

Janis: She’s only mentioned 5 lads she fancies so far

Janis: got a couple slots available, like

Jimmy: OMG! Dead proud she can count that high

Janis: I’m keeping score

Janis: fuck all else to do whilst they do their face masks

Jimmy: what do you wanna do?

Janis: what do you mean, I’m cracking on convincing them this is 💡

Janis: what are the names of your coworkers they 🤤 at

Jimmy: that’s what you have to crack on with, I could be doing owt to do their heads in

Jimmy: 👻 perks

Jimmy: [give her these cringe lads names so I don’t have to]

Janis: you can move their 👜👠 about if you like

Janis: what’s your suggestion though, clearly have one

Jimmy: if I had a 🥇💡 you’d have heard it

Janis: 👎

Janis: I know from Tam’s description I’ve NEVER seen [one which is clearly high-key emo like hello]

Jimmy: Oi, I were asking you and you’ve got nowt either, dickhead

Jimmy: but I get it, bit busy being 🧛💔 after that, you

Janis: nothing I’m telling you, maybe

Janis: um, keep your mouth shut about me stealing him ‘til they’re here or she won’t let ‘em come over, idiot ❌🩸

Jimmy: His and hers 🤐

Janis: gutted for you there’s no gimp mask emoji

Jimmy: [draw some options for what that could look like boy]

Janis: using your powers for good for once

Janis: 👍

Jimmy: bit rude

Jimmy: When have I not?

Janis: 🤔

Jimmy: least wait til I’ve chucked our kid’s card at you before you tell us you don’t want no more 🎨

Jimmy: I’ll leave it out starting tomorrow

Janis: if you like

Jimmy: you obvs would

Janis: you obvs don’t get fuck all

Janis: if it makes your life easier, go for it

Janis: there’s easier shit to fake

Jimmy: nor do you

Janis: least we don’t need to

Janis: or what a headfuck

Jimmy: you’re in the wrong 🗨️ for total bollocks

Janis: no shit

Jimmy: stop it then

Janis: you

Jimmy: you

Janis: you started it

Jimmy: How did I?

Janis: You made me sound as desperate as I feel now

Janis: so you started it

Jimmy: you’re such a twat

Janis: fuck off

Jimmy: I dunno what else I can do to show you I want you that I’ve not

Janis: just to shut me up

Janis: what else is there to say

Jimmy: you don’t speak for me, for a start

Janis: you said it, not me

Jimmy: I fucking didn’t

Janis: I just made it all up, cool, sure

Jimmy: ‘cause we’ve never misunderstood each other’s 🗨️ before

Jimmy: that’s a totally new headfuck, is it?

Janis: Maybe I’m over it

Jimmy: and what, your 🥇💡 is 🚫🗨️?

Jimmy: 👏🌹

Janis: Oh, so you’re only allowed to call it?

Janis: convenient

Jimmy: you can’t do owt about it if you’re 🔇

Janis: I can do whatever I want

Jimmy: do it then

Janis: don’t need your permission or timeline

Jimmy: if you don’t get why I did that, or owt else I’ve done that literally contradicts the bollocks you reckon I said a bit ago, you’ve got my permission, want it or not

Janis: there’s a reason this doesn’t work, clearly

Jimmy: it does work, we’ve both said

Janis: or nothing else has yet

Jimmy: I don’t want nowt else to

Janis: me either

Janis: but

Jimmy: no, I picked you, I want you

Janis: I hate feeling this fucking stupid all the time

Jimmy: I’m sorry

Janis: Don’t

Janis: apologise like I’m a fucking nightmare

Janis: just

Jimmy: I told you they’re bollocks, but there ain’t another way to go about it so

Jimmy: just take it, it’s my fault

Janis: it’s just

Janis: a mess

Janis: neither or both of us can take blame but like you said, what’s the point

Jimmy: you know what the fucking point is

Janis: they’re driving me insane

Jimmy: Give me directions

Janis: Okay

Janis: [do that]

Jimmy: do you want them to know when I’m there or just you for a bit?

Janis: I’ll come out

Janis: bring 🚬

Jimmy: [picture of 🚬s with her name on, except it’s obvs different J names written in sharpie because we’re on our way]

Janis: I’m sorry

Jimmy: You’re alright, won’t ask you to bring ☀️ rain’s stopped now any road

Janis: that was always the biggest joke anyway, far as fakery goes

Jimmy: I dunno what you mean

Janis: You picked me for my cheery disposition then I probably need to call someone

Jimmy: found out about it after, obvs

Jimmy: better 🎄 bonus than the CG offered, that

Janis: I assume that was the out of date mince pies so

Janis: can take that small of a compliment

Jimmy: got other 🎁s for you if you can't

Janis: You didn’t rip up the drawings then

Jimmy: #notallsantas remember

Jimmy: be a bit rude to make our kid 😭😭 an' all

Janis: right, don’t wanna end up on the shit list, do you

Janis: even if it’s 300 some days away now

Jimmy: More bothered about not ending up on Libi's shithead list, me

Jimmy: you can have 🎅

Janis: bit creepy but

Janis: works for me

Janis: she’s been doing my head in as well

Jimmy: reckon she could be if she were right pissed off with me and it's bad enough when you are

Jimmy: go on then, what's happened?

Janis: well Chucky and bride of, them two

Janis: more than a 🤏 rude to call me creepy as well though

Janis: s’nothing

Janis: everyone’s been pissing me off more than usual, your fault

Jimmy: I just meant it's a 🤏 shit when you don't wanna talk to me

Janis: Sure

Janis: 😏

Janis: anyway, I always wanna talk to you

Janis: I just can’t sometimes

Jimmy: Ask Asia for us where she went ginger, I'll get Bob booked in for the full Chucky treatment before the wedding

Janis: He’ll never go for it ‘less you do

Jimmy: 💔 you ain't at 💀👑's it'd be such a piss easy way to fuck up her bathroom having you do me a #transformation

Janis: Hols clearly had the dye, babe

Jimmy: no point doing it at hers, she'd never 👀 no difference to the state of her sink or towels

Janis: you can say you don’t wanna be 🎃🦊🐯🦋🐜🐙🦐🦀🐠🦧

Janis: you aren’t pulling off the 🌈 like [emo boi]

Jimmy: Ask her what other colours she has

Jimmy: nowt I couldn't pull off, dickhead

Janis: reckons she used it all on her neon barnet

Janis: gutted, mate 💔

Jimmy: 🎻🎻

Jimmy: Don't be surprised if the 🌧 starts again, like

Jimmy: actually that 💔

Janis: Poor boy

Janis: however will we cheer you

Jimmy: you’ve got a bit to work that out, I’m still walking

Janis: You’re bad at this

Janis: porno scripts should be easy to follow

Janis: you’re coming to a sleepover, you ain’t got nothing to say about pillow fights?

Jimmy: didn’t bring no pjs accidentally on purpose if you have owt you fancy saying about that

Janis: 😱 well you can’t possibly stay in your clothes, that would be RIDICULOUS

Jimmy: you get changed or what?

Janis: asking what I’m wearing?

Janis: now you’re getting it

Jimmy: where’s my answer then?

Janis: [loling you would’ve had to have your uniform and PJs in your backpack today but obvs you’ve had to so selfie]

Jimmy: [get one back because you’ve obviously had time to put a #lewk on]

Janis: 😍

Jimmy: *🥳

Janis: you’re bringing the party, I get it

Jimmy: just that chuffed to crash it, DUH

Janis: 🎉

Jimmy: Challenge accepted getting that out your hair for you

Janis: filth, you are

Jimmy: it were you asking for a porno script

Janis: they don’t do aftercare

Janis: unless it’s that #forwomen shit

Jimmy: that’s our audience, last I heard

Janis: girls, yeah

Janis: and they probably are that lame, you’re right 🙄

Jimmy: only probably?

Jimmy: SO generous, you

Janis: I was banking on no bitch watching that shit but then I thought about it

Jimmy: 💭 about your excuses to piss off for a bit without #2 following you

Jimmy: I were gonna 📞 but they’ll be dead keen to 👂

Janis: I don’t care

Janis: she can’t show Mia she’s that bored of her shit she needs to hear what I’ve got going on

Jimmy: alright, I’ll 📞 when I get there

Janis: what about my 🚬

Jimmy: come get it, I’ll direct you

Janis: in my pajamas?

Janis: alright

Jimmy: I’ll keep you warm, be alright

Janis: yeah?

Jimmy: kind of mate I am

Janis: [come find him]

Jimmy: [I like to think he’s still a bit away because slow bastard but that’s good because y’all can chill somewhere the gals can’t see you like a bus stop or neighbour’s garden]

Janis: [mind ya biz ladies]

Jimmy: [obvs gonna give you Bobby’s card but as importantly the other gifts he has brought you which are 1. Your half of whatever he’s stolen from Ian’s stash just for you, cos blatantly will probably go to a shop before the partying starts but had to, and blatantly drank his ½ on the way here and 2. A little packed lunch he has made you like the big brother/mum he is because you left without any food and went straight to work so we’re obvs worried you’ve literally eaten nothing or at the most something from the vending machines on your break and we care]

Janis: [Obviously this card is adorable and we need the booze but we’d be so confused about the lunch like what you nerd but just sharing that like there you go]

Jimmy: [the shrug that’d happen like if you don’t want it don’t eat it because ngl we’d assume she’s offended like when she wouldn’t let us help her during anklegate and when we made the dog walking suggestion, and obvs we don’t need to share this like it’s a picnic because we actually have had fuck all to do but feed and care for our sibs so we’re fine]

Janis: [a fake #shook look ‘cos you’re a known fat bitch like what]

Jimmy: [busying himself with the usual smoking rigamarole that we very much know the drill of by now]

Janis: [‘that is what I asked for’ like #bants]

Jimmy: [also shrugging off a layer so she won’t freeze to death like oh right yeah there you go too]

Janis: [‘they won’t come look for my body’ like they don’t give a shit, don’t worry but not attempting to give it back or anything]

Jimmy: [gonna say there’s a zip that you reach over and do up because you literally did that on the school trip and it was a moment then and it is now and what better way to say you’re not doing it for them without actually saying it]

Janis: [just looking at him in response, not quite a LOOK but not totally not, wondering if he’s going to say anything ‘cos we’re not babbling like an idiot the whole time]

Jimmy: [always gotta return a look even if it’s not a full LOOK and then drawing a ? on her hand like what/are you okay bae]

Janis: [‘what are- are you- were you-’ and then UGHing ‘cos you don’t know how to phrase anything you want to say/want him to say and shaking your head and going back to smoking silently like forget about it]

Jimmy: [a soft nudge that’s supposed to express it’s okay if you wanna have another go at saying any of that and also okay if you don’t and an equally soft ‘hey’ because he literally hasn’t said anything lol]

Janis: [just like oh hey, like you’re here then but not going too hard with a pisstake ‘cos not in that kind of mood hens, have a ‘hey’ back]

Jimmy: [‘feels like ages’ obvs meaning since they saw each other last/ all of that stuff happened earlier but we never offer any clarification of any kind and it’s lowkey like are you talking to her or to yourself sir]

Janis: [but we feel the same so we’re immediately like ‘what have you been doing?’ because clearly been angsting our whole shift]

Jimmy: [a nod to wherever Bobby’s card is because we’ve just been looking after him and probably having another row with Cass because of the mood we were in tbh but she doesn’t need to know that]

Janis: [nods like makes sense but, not really what I meant but you didn’t ask like YOU BEEN STRUGGLING TOO so fair enough]

Jimmy: [doing the ? a bit bigger and with slightly more pressure from our fingertip because we know there’s something but we don’t wanna be like WHAT? PLEASE TALK TO ME!]

Janis: [‘you made me feel like shit’ but there’s a question at the end there like do you feel anything or am I the only one struggling here]

Jimmy: [‘me an’ all’ do we mean we made ourselves feel like shit or you made us feel like shit too, the answer is both ofc, because suffering always ‘I thought we were getting our heads round who each other were’ because true, like can you honestly not see how I feel and why I’m doing what I’m doing]

Janis: [‘yeah’ because whatever is happening here, we know you aren’t living your best life either boy, and then taking the longest pause genuinely thinking ‘I thought so too’ such a sad little shrug ‘probably just wishful thinking, eh’ like that’s not gonna happen for either of us, lies]

Jimmy: [the MOST resigned sign ever like yeah okay, you must be right because we’re full of self doubt always, thanks for that Ian, and we’re not gonna fight any of that when you’re confirming it for us]

Janis: [we’re there too, oh guys it doesn’t need to be this drama stop]

Jimmy: [tuck the other cigarettes you wrote her not name on into the pocket of the jacket you lent her because you know she has the lighter you gave her before she gave you yours as a gift like okay I’m just gonna piss off to the shop for party stuff nbd]

Janis: [‘what are you doing?’ a fair question]

Jimmy: [a nod in the direction of what’s left if anything of the bottle he gave her like there’s your answer]

Janis: [‘what’s the point of doing that now?’ like are you cray, where’s your head at ‘cos mine is not at this sleepover]

Jimmy: [a look like what else am I supposed to do because if we sit here in awkward silence or worse try to act like that wasn’t just said, I will actually die]

Janis: [the levels of fuming we are like oh OKAY and just leaving in the direction of Hollie’s]

Jimmy: [not letting you try and stop or go after her and make this worse, walk away thank you and go get lost such is your lack of a sense of direction]

Janis: [this is such a bad idea you simply should’ve left girl]

Jimmy: [fight Mia tbh]

Janis: [honestly I do not know what’s gonna go down but you cannot invite work boy now that’s for sure lmao]

Jimmy: [lord no]

Janis: [not having you bang him when we’re meant to come back from all this...heh]

Jimmy: [not having Jimothy beat up this poor boy]

Janis: [it’s fine because even if you’re talking to him such is the drama, you’d figure it’d be cringe to invite him to this mess so we can avoid that without just avoiding it because we don’t want to]

Jimmy: [could invite Harry we’ve done that before on previous jj attempts]

Janis: [that works better because we don’t care about you even a bit like you’re a dickhead we don’t wanna be mates with in any sense so you can come and bring god knows who else]

Jimmy: [please bring your brother even though Mia’s busy banging Hollie’s because will amuse me]

Janis: [why not honestly, may as well show him out the gate what you’re like ‘cos that’s going to be a drama in and of itself]

Jimmy: [he must be a messy bitch too so god knows what he’ll be doing]

Janis: [maybe trying to get on Ella]

Jimmy: [loves it]

Janis: [evidently your type of energy so]

Jimmy: [how am I gonna get Jimothy here though hmmmm]

Janis: [clearly we’ve fully just put the address out there now ‘cos we don’t give a shit so you could see that and map or see a group of peeps evidently on their way from school; either way, it’s already gonna be 0-100 by the time you show]

Jimmy: [good idea boo, do you wanna have him walk straight into the Harry situation or is there anything you wanna do first?]

Janis: [even though we’re like FUCK IT ALL, we aren’t going to make it that easy/that obvs to the gals that Harry is there for us/like omg she’s cheating!!!1/!? So you probably will see her amidst this chaos first]

Jimmy: [the locked eyes across the carnage cliche, because he’s obvs fully blending in and ignoring everyone and everything like the ghost boy he is but she #sees him huns]

Janis: [we do, because you do know each other fgs, but for now we’re just bowing like ta-da/you’re welcome ‘cos obvs you’re so buzzing about this party babe, you just couldn’t wait]

Jimmy: [actual sarcastic slow clap because we don’t give a shit either rn]

Janis: [lord knows what every gal is doing but just pointing out the ones you can see with your eyes like there, night’s ruined, happy now?]

Jimmy: [just signing ‘I don’t care’ at her because we truly don’t but we’re not gone enough we’re gonna shout that across a party, I assume it’s something he would have taught you because flatwhite shade without them knowing so]

Janis: [just looking at the door he’s barely coming in with his haul like mhmm like neither of us needed to be here but that’s not a convo we’re ready for clearly boy, walk off now and find some other source of drink]

Jimmy: [raising the bottle he’s drinking out of like a cheers in answer to why you’re here because true what are you gonna do go home and chill with Ian and his nearly gone stash, I think not]

Janis: [I think we could all find better parties when we have nothing else to do boy but you know, life sucks and y’all don’t wanna not be at the same party, even if we’re just dancing and dranking with anyone rn]

Jimmy: [I’m cackling imagining some CG peeps trying to talk to him and he’s just fully blanking them like he’s a real deaf mute]

Janis: [we’re not here to make friends tonight babes, I’m thinking you probably didn’t invite your colleagues hen because the time? You’ve not had it]

Jimmy: [I wanna spare you that because they are probably decent-ish and you could get some mates out of it eventually and you deserve that babe]

Janis: [likewise Pete or any other decent colleague does not need to be here, just the people we can throw to this mess happily]

Jimmy: [agreed because the levels he is not gonna try with any of y’all tonight when he barely does anyway, regretting his #lewk now because he looks great and I’m sure plenty of girls are trying to get his attention, soz boy]

Janis: [another reason to be fuming at you, like fuck you boy, straight up here in our PJs ‘cos lord KNOWS we’re not changing into anything Hollie has I’m sorry]

Jimmy: [we all know damn well she looks incredible, gonna say he goes to smoke outside and escape everyone but obvs there are just different girls out there to notice you so you can’t cos I’m evil and it’s legit when they’re running around looking like models]

Janis: [y’all don’t intentionally go around pulling focus yet here we are, like there’s so many people here, leave them alone lmao]

Jimmy: [fully will just have to hide like when Cook popped out of that wardrobe with that vodka or whatever it was]

Janis: [clearly going to bump into each other whilst trying to hide, such is your vibe]

Jimmy: [and he totally will give up said hiding place for you because a gentleman underneath it all]

Janis: [being like ‘wait’ but then just taking some of his drink ‘cos you ain’t ready to say nothing]

Jimmy: [only not fully letting her have that as well because he doesn’t wanna walk away]

Janis: [‘this is shit’ in a tone that sounds like you’re talking about the party even though you clearly are not]

Jimmy: [‘yeah’ likewise and taking the bottle back because you’re a fat bastard who ate too much earlier to be drunk enough for this]

Janis: [‘I don’t know how they can all be so boring’ again, you mean literally everyone at this soiree but you could just be dragging the gals]

Jimmy: [a shrug and a big drink because he was gonna say something complimentary about how she’s the only person who isn’t and that’s not something he’s drunk enough for either ‘will to live?’ like maybe that’s why they’re looking on the bright side and making mems]

Janis: [a pfft like I think not ‘not a brain cell to kill between ‘em, more like’]

Jimmy: [a nod like yeah, once again you’re probably right]

Janis: [‘least some of them are better to look at than the gals’ as if you didn’t find him hiding and your jealousy isn’t totally unwarranted lmao]

Jimmy: [his own I think not noise and facial expression as he looks around like um where but then looks at her ‘one of them is, more like’]

Janis: [making you say ‘who?’ like an idiot before you can stop yourself because clearly you stormed back and got on it immediately like honey]

Jimmy: [just loling before we can or would stop ourselves ‘should’ve done you more sandwiches’ because affectionately have to call you a pisshead/lightweight always]

Janis: [pushing him like shut up but not in a fully pissed off way ‘cos we did that to ourselves there]

Jimmy: [a lock and key mime for his lips and chucking that imaginary key into the chaos we left because obvs need to go harder than a zip now that we feel like we just keep fucking up today]

Janis: [do a sad thumbs up that’s barely worth faking honestly]

Jimmy: [a thumbs down of course because we hate that and everything rn]

Janis: [pushing the corners of his mouth up ‘not your party, only they’re supposed to cry’ at least y’all only needed to do this much and Mia is gonna take it from here messing up everyone’s evening but you don’t know that yet lol]

Jimmy: [I love how personally she would take it even though nothing they’ve done this evening has actually been about her in the slightest, but meanwhile Jimothy’s just looking at his bae, blinking away fake tears and trying not to cry in an OTT way but it’s too real because he is that sad and would like to]

Janis: [‘pussy’ but in a soft as hell way, which we have to cover by dramatically wiping away said imaginary tears like get a grip hun but just looking at him sadly ‘cos he looks so sad]

Jimmy: [opening his mouth as if to say a million things but saying none of them as per before closing his eyes, taking a deep breath and opening them again then shaking his head/himself all like he’s pulling himself together for the lols if anyone asks but we are also actually trying to]

Janis: [the BIGGEST sigh as this all transpires like okay and getting up and putting out a hand to pull him up like ‘can’t hide forever then’]

Jimmy: [not taking her hand but not in a petty king way but like a sad child when they just don’t want to]

Janis: [‘it’d be a shame to waste your outfit’ like you look great boy and we aren’t going to pretend]

Jimmy: [looking down in such genuine confusion/almost like we’re in a dream because it feels like another life since we wanted to serve a #lewk for you gal ‘bit late’ cos it already is a waste and a shame obviously now that we don’t have the bae on side and everything’s fucked]

Janis: [‘what else can you do?’ Echoing what you didn’t say but we very much got the message from earlier boy and just shrugging helplessly]

Jimmy: [‘what else can I?’ like tell me how to fix this because I tried explaining and apologising and not talking and walking away and all the things]

Janis: [‘it’s-’ and stopping ourselves like UGH ‘-how can I say it without throwing out a it’s not you it’s me?’ like let’s not hit that cliche ew]

Jimmy: [‘just-’ his tone is just pure desperation and frustration at the situation they find themselves in, goodbye ‘tell me’]

Janis: [‘every time I forget this is fake, you remind me that it is’ just blurting that out so fast, like, hope you got that boy because we’ve shut our mouth like no more]

Jimmy: [a look like yeah same because I let myself think it was real and then you left and then earlier I let my guard down again in an intimate way and look where we are ‘don’t just put that on me’]

Janis: [‘I didn’t call you a job after-’ and a look just like what ‘cos we don’t understand our role in this right now problematic queen]

Jimmy: [‘I’m not doing you a list why you’re as bad’]

Janis: [just shaking our head and gesturing like there we go then, there’s nothing more to say]

Jimmy: [a gesture like off you go then]

Janis: [‘fuck you’ but do leave]

Jimmy: [gotta let her go boy even though I wish you wouldn’t]

Janis: [‘cos we know you’ve gotta go let Harry snek flirt on you now ugh]

Jimmy: [how do you want this to pop off? When we did it before I think they were grooving and another time I think they were just talking/flirting]

Janis: [hmm, I kind of want to do dancing because the gals are that messy and as are we but also no one but him would need to notice because of said mess so it wouldn’t fuck everything]

Jimmy: [the awkward moment Jimothy’s reaction might direct attention to this but I agree, it’s a good shout when everyone is clearly dancing with everyone and being a state]

ella & mia, how’d your night go babes] Janis: [well couples have domestics and if you wanna say shit@

Jimmy: [the way he’s gonna just push Harry away from her not in the !! way of fuck off I’m gonna beat the shit out of you immediately that everyone would be living for but just really dismissively like who the fuck are you, move]

Janis: [The way that rat is gonna be like I’m here with her, like she invited me, we’re dying we want to throw up lmao]

Jimmy: [he’s just gonna be like ‘piss off bellend’ in a tone that implies not a single person would or does believe that thank you, even though we secretly do obvs, gotta keep it dismissive and unfazed unless he makes us smack him lol]

Janis: [we’re just here also trying to bring that casual energy despite how far from it we feel like ‘can you just give us some space, like’ to Harry like the politest fuck off so he doesn’t go and chat shit on you but also does leave, hopefully]

Harry cos you know he’s a twat who won’t go in a chill way ever and there’s only the slightest threat in his voice despite the fact he wants to murder you] Jimmy: [give Jimmy his oscar tbh, thanks Ian for helping us bring an energy we definitely don’t feel to a shit situation, because he’s just gotta be like ‘you heard’@

Janis: [Starting this drama that’s only gonna escalate when he feels like you do this to him again, yay, can just make some comment about seeing her later as you go now though ‘cos we ain’t brawling here and now not like this]

Jimmy: [Jimothy you’re not as hurt as you’re gonna be soon but you still have those OG rib injuries so no brawling for you thanks, once he’s gone just saying ‘fuck you’ back to the bae but quiet because we’re livid and hurt ‘I would never-’ like this is one of the reasons you’re as bad since you asked and walking away]

Janis: [Starting to nod like, yeah, I know, I know that was bad but then he’s gone before you can commit to anything more than that nod]

Jimmy: [fully just walking out and leaving this house with no thought to anyone or anything like]

Janis: [I’m like don’t you dare follow him bitch, don’t you dare, going outside but stopping you from doing that because we can’t, let him go]

[athetos]

not to be basic but glimmer?

@goblinkind asked for glimmer too! I was hoping people would ask for her 👀

Some songs definitely on her iPod: I have wretched taste in music. But: “rebel girl” by bikini kill, “nobody” by mitski, “oh no!” By marina and the Diamonds (that’s on noelle’s official playlist for her... she’s canonically a marina wlw) and “I wanna get better” by the bleachers

The one place they end up falling asleep where they’re not supposed to: I think since glimmer has the ability to teleport, when she gets super exhausted she can just make it back to her bed. That said i am going to project my narcolepsy on her and I think she would definitely fall asleep at her desk in the middle of doing Important Queen Business

The game they’d destroy everyone at: I joked about this a bit with @freezingmyblitzballs and @softpastel-lesbian and I believe we decided she absolutely kicks ass at Mario kart. Her only competition would be like, maybe mermista. Adora always come in the last 3 spots but she’s just having a good time. Glimmer would get super competitive about it too. I want to write a fic about this now shit.

The emoticon they’d use most: I think she’d respond to a lot of messages with “no ❤️” if she didn’t agree / want to do anything. Wait that’s an emoji not an emoticon. Um... no wait she’d use this emoji 😇 all the time especially when she was definitely doing something illegal and everyone knows she’s not innocent.

What they act like when they haven’t had enough sleep: grumpy but in a very cute way. She would push herself too hard especially with Important Queen Duties and she would be warm and snuggly though 🥺

Their preferred hot beverage on cold nights / mornings: I think she’d be a big tea drinker. All kinds, really. Green tea or mint tea the big ones. Mint tea is awesome actually. I also think she’d indulge in hot chocolate every once in a while, or have like. Unicorn Frappuccino’s from Starbucks. Wait those are frozen. Oh well.

How they like to comfort/care for themselves when they’re in a slump: glimmer would be the person who says “time to treat myself” whenever she has a moderately bad day, which, same. I think she’d wear her comfiest, favorite clothes and relax with a nice hobby and delicious food. I honestly think she’d love like, fantasy romance novels secretly.

What they wanted to be when they grew up: in canon-verse, I would just say queen, which of course when she finally DOES become queen, she’s not resdy at all, hehe 💔 in a modern setting, I could see her wanting to have been a musician even though she knows 3 chords on guitar, or like an astronaut.

Favorite kind of weather: spring mornings where it’s not hot but it’s not too chilly just perfect sweater weather, the sun is out, maybe some clouds, no rain.

Thoughts on singing voice? Karen Fukuhara has an awesome voice, I could see her being able to hit higher notes while also being able to deepen her voice and it being like 😳 I think like, a pop punk au glimmer is so good. Wait didn’t somebody write that... a certain somebody...? 🤔

How/what they like to draw/doodle? WINGS. And lots of hearts. Swords and axes. Her notebooks would be full of doodles cuz it’s the only way she can pay attention in class.

Thank you both!!!

[myupsteadheart]

First of all: that visual for this chapter fits perfectly for me!!!!! This moment in this episode (one of my favorite Jay episodes!) is right before my undoing (still! always will be!) because of Jays undoing! And HELL, THIS VISUAL IS RIGHT BEFORE MY COMPLETE (COMPLETE!!!!!) UNDOING BECAUSE OF THIS GOD DAMN CHAPTER!!!!!!! Em, YOU ARE A BRILLIANT WRITER!!!!!!!

💔 Soldier BROKEN! Sunshine BROKEN! Me BROKEN! 💔

1) BREATH! Yeah! I think I had to take a deep breath too, when I started reading! 😮‍💨

2) ...and then she's like on autopilot! I think she's functioning, because IT IS JAY! But then she realized that maybe he isn't her guy anymore? 😭😭😭😭 "Is he my anything at all anymore?" 😭😭😭 Sunshine, this was supposed to be your new beginning that's coming home to you!! 💔😭😭

3) In this cell stands a broken soldier!🥺 And every describtion of him standing in this cell, broke my heart! And I have a feeling Haileys heart broke again too! 💔💔🥺🥺 ... I'm assuming the other guy is Mouse? 🤔

4) Because he’s there, but he’s not. 💔😭😭😭😭 That's definitely not your guy, isn't it Sunshine??? 🥺🥺🥺

5) Em!? 😭😭😭😭 The way you describe Sunshine's feelings is just so fucking heartbreaking enough for me!!! 💔😭😭😭 She wants to hold this stranger, whom she supposed to love, tight! 😭😭😭😭 My heart 💔💔💔

6) This 🤝🏻 is Hailey meeting Mouse!? Definitely not the way I expected that to happen! 😭😭😭

7) “I forgot how good my shirt looks on you.” 😭😭😭😭 Noooooo no no no! Say hello to my tears!!!

8) “You’re a godsend, Sunny.” WTF Mouse? I can't quite decide if I should say "You're right Mouse," or call him a dumbass for calling her Sunny... 🤦‍♀️

9) 🛋 of course she offers him the couch 🥺🥺🥺 ...and then his god damn manners! 🥺🥺🥺 When he offers her his hoodie, my mind was straight back to when he carried her bag! 🥺😭 (such a happy time 😭) THIS IS JAY HALSTEAD!! He just has to find a way back to himself! 🥺🥺🥺 ...maybe with the help of his sunshine??? 🙏🏼🙏🏼

10) This whole bathroom scene when she sees the scars, when he catches her gaze, when she cleans his wounds made my heart so damn aching! BUT when he's asking her, no BEGGING her just to sleep, to sleep in her arms. 😭😭😭😭 I just dropped my phone on the couch and IMMEDIATELY startet to cry (very much!!). I definitely needed a minute to calm down! He's so broken! He's so fucking broken! And this breaks me! This breaks my heart for every soldier! 😭😭😭😭

11) and after I calmed down I've read the rest of this paragraph, AND: "I want that kind of peace before this slips through my fingers again.” And I could've just started crying all over again!! 💔💔💔 ...just the words destroyed me! I can't even imagine how these words with the broken Halstead look must affected her... 💔💔💔

12) “You were supposed to come home to me." ... “You deserve better than the person that came home.” 😭😭😭 Tears streaming down on my face!!! TEARS TEARS TEARS!!! This whole conversation!? All of his shocking explanations from his last days in Afghanistan?! Him reaching out his hand to her, but her pull away from him?! 😭😭😭💔💔💔

13) “Because I got Bo killed.” 😳😳😳 WHAT???????????? I almost dropped my phone on the couch again!!!!

14) Everthing I've read after that sentence is a read through a blur of TEARS TEARS TEARS! CRYING! ACTUAL CRYING! ...and then Hailey says “You were the one good thing that came out of losing Bo." 😭😭😭😭 AND THAT GOD DAMN SONG IMMEDIATELY CROSSED MY MIND!!!! 🎶 Closing time ... every new beginning... 🎶 And if by now I wouldn't be this broken as I am, that would be my COMPLETE undoing!!

15) “Maybe we’ll get another someday,” NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! My heart just shatters into a million pieces!!! 💔💔💔💔💔 A MILLION!!!!! I DON'T WANT ANOTHER SOMEDAY!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭 LET HER HELP YOU!!! NOW!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭

16) "Be well, Hailey Upton." 😭💔😭💔😭💔😭💔😭💔 I'M BROKEN!!!!!!!! This line, the promise to write letters, the new someday and that I have THAT SONG in my mind all over again AND that I cried like a baby is just like I've read chapter 4 again!!

17) And just like you ended this chapter as it began, I needed to take one, two, three DEEP breathes to calm me down a little!

I NEED TO SEE, HOW ALL OF THIS UNFOLDS!!!!!!!! And if -> NOOOOO scratch that!!!!!! ‐> WHEN(!!!) these two will get their new SOMEDAY!!!!! 😭😭😭

I Go With You: Chapter 17

Summary: When heartbreaking circumstances lead Hailey and Jay’s lives to intersect, everything feels out of place. With a bit of time, distance, and a habit fourteen years in the making, they find a way to help one another through their shared grief. Soon enough they begin to realize — maybe nothing was out of place at all.

Writer’s Note: Special edition visual for a uh… special? chapter. Prepare yourselves for this one. Maybe with some tissues and comfort items? That’s all I’ve got to say, so happy reading & welcome to chapter 17!

Read on AO3

[the-acid-pear]

This is it fellas, 5 chapters to the end! This book truly was a ride lmao

Still Chapter 305

Hanayama don't be dumb i thought everyone already knew they were no match for the ogre!

Don't kill your boss, Shiba

Yeah all those deep breaths he kept taking was him trying to remember how to breath AGZENSEGS himbo icon, though I've been there lmao

FR FR,,,,

Someone asked where Kozue at and a mf answered "kanzoken" 💀

I am wondering where Pickle is tho

Chapter 306

PONYTAIL IN COVER... 👉👈

YUJIRO HERO MOMENCE?!

Maybe it really is part of the Hanma blood to be good in some degree

This is literally the Lilo n stitch meme

"he kinda looks like Retsu" "you either die a Retsu or live long enough to become a Yujiro"

Chapter 307

Hhhh so fucking epic

IF COOOURSE HE IS KATSUMI, LITERALLY FIRST ROW AJSEHSJ

Oh hey grandpa finally see you again!

JACK,,, 😭

Oh nooo,,,,,,,,

Oh i didn't even realize that 1) jack got his face back and 2) he was doing drugs fsr

Chapter 308

👁️👁️?

I'M SORRY BUT I DON'T TRUST YUJIRO, HE DID THIS TO EMI TOO

MICHELLE?!

JGSURSJRAESYD OBAMA MEAN AND FUCKED UP MOMENTS

THAT FACE AUGH 🥺😭💞

Yeah and there he goes.

Chapter 309

Hmhjfjshdhs 😔😔😔

I didn't remember Hanayama being there to see Emi die 🤔

That i know hurts

AUGH BAKI PLEAAAASE

SHIT I DIDN'T SEE THE CHAPTER TITLE, "THE SAME AS HIS MOTHER" OUCHHH 😖😭

Chapter 310

THAT'S SO IMPRESSIVE HOLY FUVK

Huge dick energy

STANDO POWAH EVEN...

Doppo this is like the third time you have said that, leave like a coward or watch that poor kid be murdered like an animal!

Tofu?

HE'S MAKING A SOUP?!

BROOO 😭

HAGAKSGSKGSSK I KNOW I COMPLAINED ABOUT DOPPO BUT DONT COMPARE HIM TO THE ASSHOLE THAT KEPT SAYING THIS MANGA WAS GAY BUT READ IT ANYWAY ABSGKSG

Chapter 311

BROOOOOOO 😭😭😭

I love how they keep showing us Doppo being like 😧, like yesss king give us nothing!! STAGWHSGS

It truly is 😔🥺

IgduraursyrsteR brooo 😭💔

URAURSIRSITDUTSAEYU

Chapter 312 and last let's... Go? 🥺💔

I really don't understand Yujiro but HELL do i love him

Doppo i fucking adore you SFGAFS

WHAT?!

LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOO

EVEN IF TOKUGAWA DIES HELL WILL HE DIE HAPPY 🥺😭

AND WITH THAT THE THIRD BOOK IS OVER, BAKI WON, BAKI FUCKIKG WON, HE'S THE STRONGEST CREATURE IN THE WORLD, THE OGRE HIMSELF SAID IT, HE WONNN!!! 😭💞🎉

Tumblr is ready to kick me in the nuts, so to avoid that, regulatory second post of this dumb liveblog! Let's go-

Chapter 211

Oh that's an insane coincidence

I'm gonna lose my fucking shit

Yujiro's fucked up anatomy is so fucking funny

He's just built different y'all let him be :/

I like how he's talking alone

Chapter 212

Erect 😳 (sorry I'm 5)

It's been so long since i saw someone open a bottle normally lol

Hehe hairy. Reminds me of Garland in a way, i miss him.

God i would fucking die out of embarrassment if i was on Retsu's place 😐

4001 🥺

Utterly obsessed with mfs being able to recognize the real ppl in this manga lmao

Chapter 213

I don't know if that's a real proverb but if Retsu says it I'll buy it

GOD I LOVE THIS MAN AUGH

Get his ass Retsu 😍

Chapter 214

What is a "rule"? 🤨

I keep forgetting he's missing a leg, están todos mochos estos protagonistas

Retsu be looking like a wet puppy all of the sudden mf went 🥺

Haha i wish i could squish an arm like that ☺️

This is so damn boxing like YESSS this is how every boxing movie goes so true!!! 😍

Which makes the dramatism funny bc we know Retsu can kill

OYDIRAITWOUROYE

Someone in the comments mentioned how if feels like reading with friends and honestly that's so true 🥰

Chapter 215

I love how he has some fans already

RIGHT THESE MFS FIGHT FOR NO ONE AND FOR NOTHING JUST FOR HONOR

Yeah no if a guy like that appeared irl i too would cheer for him

Retsu is having a crisis did he really not know this was all a farse? Like dude, c'mon.

Retsu got up in this ring ready to kill lmao

IYSITITSTSIIT nahhh i trust Retsu ~

"so hairy... but so elegant."

I just realized i got the song inexplicable stuck in my head bc that was the name of the chapter lol

Chapter 216

God i love Retsu so much i have so much hope placed on him

I think Retsu has one of the best character developments in this entire franchise (at least judging by so far)

YESSSSSS KINGGG 😍😍😍

Chapter 217

God i was looking like 👁️👁️ until i realized that was a mouthguard

I just came from the hospital and I'm a bit out of the loop lol

King shit i think I'm super out of it but that was badass i think

Jgzuggdlityfoh the drivers face 😭

I wonder what he will do with 2 million dollars tho

Chapter 218

Bruh his hair got cut by thin air

Did his hair get longer?

Baki really became a "well done, son!" guy

This conversation feels so fucking weird

Oh no one understands shit in the comments either, fair

Chapter 219

Yujiro legitimately surprised by kindness 😧

HE'S SO LEGITIMATELY SURPRISED, i mean considering how Baki had been since he's 13 it makes sense

I'm losing my fucking mind, yujiro i love you but i hate you

I like how most think this Yujiro is fake, i think he isn't <3

Someone called Yujiro autistic and i can't tell if they mean it literally or as an insult, like he IS a very picky guy who always wears the same clothes and has a mad low empathy... Murder is his special interest 🥰 /j

Chapter 220

I honestly feel happy for Baki, he's so euphoric over his dad hanging out with him lmao

I miss Kureha's bangs :/

Tokugawa please stop killing urself

Obsessed this man will literally die, unironically wondering why Itagaki would do that

Mfs speaking shit of Retsu's boxer arc... Stfu it's so fun :/

Chapter 221

Isn't 36 a big number for a boxer?

I really wonder what Retsu wants the money for, dude doesn't live a wild life, he doesn't often drink, he doesn't fuck, he doesn't do drugs...

KWHWKDHSUS THE FIRST TIME SOMEONE ACKNOWLEDGES THESE MEN'S GAY ASSES

ALI SR!?

Kinda sweet how he's doing this for Baki i guess

There is a guy defending Retsu with teeth and nail n like all true bestie <3

Chapter 222

Tf is that foot? Who owns it?

OOOOH SHIBA!!! MY BELOVED 🥺

Shiba against Baki?! Iit surely can't be, he must just be taking him to Hanayama, right?

TF SHIBA? YOU KNOW NOT EVEN YOUR BOSS CAN WIN AGAINST HIM!

GET HIS ASS RETSU PLEASE

Chapter 223

We are all wondering the same, Baki <:/

Yeah it is kinda badass

Shiba please, at least Baki won't kill him so it's ok but STILL BRO PLS-

Rip Retsu 😔💔

Chapter 224

Slender?! Bro this mf mad buff

I'm so obsessed with this like Shiba didn't show up in how many chapters then randomly decides to fight Baki. Also, Hanayama is gonna die of cirrhosis :/

WITH OPEN HAND TO THE CHIN...

Chapter 225

I wonder how this will affect Shiba

Crying and shaking Retsu get up 😭

Retsu i love your monologue and analysis but you are sort of in a fight?

Holy fuck Retsu is tripping balls

Chapter 226

Shiba please

>:<

OHDIRSISTDOYHD BAKI JUST WANTS TO CHILL PLEASEEE

FUCKING BITCH SLAPPED

A gentler devil... I like that

IYDOYDITSUSITURSDUT

On god is this how Yujiro feels? Thought tbf Yujiro used to make ppl hate him on purpose ;/

Chapter 227

"i will teach you something" *breaks your jaw*

Obsessed with who i assume is young Kaku btw

SPIN?

Chapter 228

Dude the shoes :/

Aw he's so nice ☺️

"that last panel looking like he bout to drop some beats but knowing the situation he's going to ve dropping a body"

Chapter 229

Poor coach lmao

He DID move lol

OBSESSED HE'S SPINNING ON HIS PEG LEG 😭

Retsu don't lose 😢

Chapter 230

"what did he get???" OUFOOYDOTSUEAIRW 😭😭😭

Shiba... Baby, you will die.

I love how nicely he's taking it lmao

This is LITERALLY Katsumi vs Doyle

SOMEONE ELSE MENTIONED IT LMAO

Anyways good luck on Shiba and wanting to taste defeat

Reality is my phone reset on its own and i lost the last 4 chapters but that's fine, i need to take a nap anyway