#always have meaning. what i believe is that when the conscious mind shuts off for sleep; the subconscious starts unpacking stuff completely

[fingertipsmp3]

So me and my friend unpacked that night terror I had the other night & basically I am now on a self-imposed horror ban because I genuinely think if I keep consuming horror with my current mental state I will have a full-blown psychotic break 😔✌🏻

[reidrum]

stargazing | s.r.

A/N: this was a request and the concept itself makes me sick so here’s this, spencer reid i will fight your demons for you get behind me

summary: in which you attempt to heal a little part of spencer, one star at a time

cw: just fluff and comfort, fear of dark, can be read as gn!reader

wc: 1.1k

Learning about Spencer was a privilege, if you had to describe it. He would most likely say the same about you if he was asked, but god does he not know the marvel of discovering the inner workings and tinkerings that is Spencer Reid.

You knew he loved magic because of the child-like wonder and imagination it brings him. He always reads old literature in their native language because he believes the translated ones muddle the original intent. He refuses to wear matching socks because he loves when kids point out they’re mismatched and he gets to act all silly with them.

And tonight, you’ve learned yet another one. Spencer Reid is afraid of the dark.

It’s a logical fear to have, hell you still sleep with a nightlight and stuffie every night too. But for Spencer, it was different. The darkness didn’t just remind him of the unknown, it reminded him of places he’d been, places he spent countless nights trying to forget about but latch onto him like a blood sucking leech.

When you found out about it, it was completely unintentional. It happened at a movie night about a week ago, it was getting too late for you to drive back home so Spencer offered you to stay over and head back in the morning. After he’d given you a change of his clothes he went and got settled on the bed, and you went over to the light switch to turn it off.

“Wait!” you hear Spencer rush out, “Do you mind if we…keep it on?”

“You sure? I thought you were really sleepy.”

He looks at you nervously, “I—I am, it’s just…” he trails off.

It takes you a few seconds to understand what he really means, a look of recognition washing over your face while Spencer’s fills with guilt.

“It’s okay, we can keep it on.” you say lightly, walking back over to get under the covers with him. You cozy up next to him and look up, “I didn’t know you were…”

“I don’t really talk about it, I’m sorry.” he whispers, his voice still holding what sounded like shame to you.

“Spence, it’s okay you don’t need to explain to me. Just want you to be comfortable, okay?”

He nods one last time before sinking his head down onto his pillow, and through his lashes wishes you good night. It really broke your heart to see Spencer be so affected by something that made him feel scared and self conscious. You just wish you could do something to help him feel better.

Lucky for you, you knew Spencer really well.

The next movie night you came prepared with a surprise of your own, hoping it would ease Spencer’s anxieties a little as he tried his best to rest.

“You look excited. More than you usually are when I pick an old Russian movie.” he remarks with a soft smile, opening the door wider for you.

“While I am very excited to watch Catch 22 in Russian, I brought something for you!”

He looks at you quizzically, “What? You didn’t need to bring anything, you know that—”

You wave him off and bound over to the couch, “Come sit, I’ll show you.”

Spencer shuts the door and sits next to you as you produce an opened package from behind your back, “Okay, I hope you don’t take this the wrong way,”

“Always a great way to start a sentence.” he quips.

“Stop! I’m being serious,” you lightly thwap him on the shoulder, “Okay, I couldn’t stop thinking about how you told me you’re afraid of the dark, and I’m really happy that you felt comfortable enough to tell me, but it also made me really sad to think about you alone in your room not feeling okay…so.”

Before Spencer can even respond you pull out the contents of the opened package and lay it in your lap, beginning to work on opening the outer plastic. His brows furrow slightly, “What is that?”

You smile, “Well I was going to get you a cool nightlight, I saw some sick Tardis ones or even a pumpkin shaped one. Which I can still get if you want or if you hate this…” you finally get the last plastic off and pull out what’s inside, “But I got you these.” you hold them out for him to see.

Spencer gazes over your hands and asks, “Stars?”

“They’re glow in the dark stars,” you say matter of factly. You hold one out for him, watching him cup his hand around his eye to shroud the star in darkness and see its glow, “I used to have them on the ceiling and walls in my room when I was little.”

He smiles fondly thinking about a tiny you in a tiny bed, staring up at the stars on your ceiling as you try to fall asleep. You continue softly, “I was thinking we could put these up in your room and make little astronomically correct constellations on your ceiling. The intention is that whenever you look up you can remind yourself of the stories of the constellations to help you fall back asleep. But whenever you’re feeling afraid or scared, you can look up and see Ursa Major or Cassiopeia reminding you that you’re safe.”

Spencer is not often left speechless, but he’s come to learn that anything’s possible with you. He is not able to process that you took it upon yourself to find a solution to something that’s been plaguing his sleep for years, something that he didn’t even know could be fixed. A few tears escape from his eyes before he can help it, followed by a quick sniffle that brings your attention back to his face.

“Oh Spence,” you breathe out, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No, no I’m not upset,” he pulls his sleeve to wipe his eyes, “The exact opposite, actually. This…is the most thoughtful thing anyone’s ever done for me.”

You smile softly, “I just wanted to help. You deserve to rest and feel safe in your own space. If I can help with that in any way, I will.”

For the fear of crying again in front of you, Spencer grabs you and pulls you close to his chest, the smell of his laundry detergent and cologne overwhelming your senses so much you almost miss the muffled ‘Thank you’ whispered into your hair.

You press a small kiss to his chest, right on his heart before standing up and gathering the stars in your hands, “Okay, so which constellation are we doing first?”

All the love inside of him is about to burst as he looks at you about to walk into the bedroom, “Have I ever told you about the story of Perseus and Andromeda?”

[finallysafeawakepowerful]

What you maintain in the 4th dimension, your conscious and subconscious impressions as TRUE reality BEING EXPERIENCED, currently, NOW as TRUE, ACTUAL, physical reality … is granted. What you believe to BE TRUE REALITY experiencing, is true reality experiencing, as always. You are currently in a shadow of what you believed to be true. >Shift and it will too. What you believe to be true… who you act as though … live as though… seeeee from, believe from. Form.

“Be Anne” Truly BE that person you desire. Truly BE the person you want to be. Truly THINK as them. Truly THINK from their mind. Truly THINK and SEE and BELIEVE and EMBODY and IDENTIFY as them. Think the thoughts they would have. What tasks you must do, or have done, how incredible this is. How secure you feel. How proud you are of yourself. Hop into that timeline and stay in that timeline and bury the old. It is dead. You can no longer enter that body or world. The door is shut and you are kicked out and you’ve entered the new it’s the ONLY way you can think and see from because it is where you are living.

“Be the successful Author.” Imagine the covers, imagine the books selling out and you can’t even keep them on the shelves. “Be the successful business owner.” Imagine the tasks done with successful outcomes. Imagine the happy customers. Imagine the designs for products and finalizing them and customers commenting on the beautifully boxed packages. Imagine them complimenting the mission. Imagine successfully negotiating with your supplier and shipper. Imagine your first bulk order selling out within weeks. “Be the successful person who doesn’t worry about money.” Go shopping or to the spa and imagine not having to check your account to ensure the funds. Imagine not having the old thought of I can’t go buy that or I can’t go get that treatment done. Now it’s whatever you want! I don’t worry about money. I trust myself so much I know everything is set. I see the money in my account. I see the books selling off the shelves. I see the happy customers.

Our acceptance of the imagination as physical reality wills the means for fulfillment. There can be no other way. Nothing that is, is without.

Let me again lay the foundation of changing future, which is nothing more than a controlled waking dream, which is nothing more than your regular conscious creation:

Define your objective - know definitely what you want.

Construct an event which you believe you will encounter following the fulfillment of your desire, your regular life, an event which complies the fulfillment of your desire.

Immobilize the physical body and induce a state of consciousness akin to sleep; then, mentally feel yourself right into the proposed action, imagining all the while you are actually performing the action here and now, so that you experience in imagination what you would experience in the flesh were you now to realize this goal.

When we have learned to control the movements of our attention in our 4D world, we shall be able to consciously create circumstances in the 3D world. As we already do, with everything.

We learn this control through the waking dream, where our attention is maintained without effort, for attention minus effort is indispensable to changing the future. We can, in a controlled waking dream, consciously construct and create an event which we desire to experience in the 3D world, constructing it as we do with every single sensory experience anyway.

The sensory impressions we use to construct our waking dream are present realities displaced in time or the 4D world…. All we have to do in constructing the waking dream is to select from the vast array of sensory impressions those, which, when properly arranged, imply we have realized our desire. (Is this what Deja vu is? Our incredible minds creating because nothing can be without it?)

With the dream clearly designed and defined, we relax and induce a consciousness or state akin to sleep - a state bordering on sleep but leaves us conscious control of our attention. When this state is achieved, we experience in imagination what we would experience in reality (were this waking dream an objective fact.) ……. in applying this technique to change the future, it is IMPORTANT to always remember that the only thing which occupies the mind during the waking dream IS the waking dream, (the reality) the predetermined action which implies the fulfillment of desires. To only experience the reality, your imagination, as you would in your 3D world. HOW the waking dreams becomes physical fact is not your concern. The ACCEPTANCE of the waking dream as PHYSICAL REALITY, AS TRUTH wills the means for fulfillment.

- Neville Goddard

Being from, forming 🔗

[rey-jake-therapist]

I want to start off by saying I love your page and I’m dying to know your thoughts on this. It’s a little long so bear with me please. :)

We know that at this point in TROP the door between Galadriel and Sauron’s mind is still open. That her saying “The door is shut” could’ve been for dramatic effect with that kick.

But it got me thinking, why didn’t Sauron block that kick then? He’s demonstrated before how easily he was able to counter her attacks with minimal effort. So why was it different this time? Then she was able to slice his cheek and it clicked for me.

When looking back on their whole fight, I don’t think Galadriel really had a plan. She knows she can’t kill him, disarming him won’t be enough, and trying to distract him from the rings would be ridiculous because she has them! I think she is just so pissed that she doesn’t care about anything else and only wants to show him the anger she has towards herself and at him for even having been in her life.

When they have that brief moment before continuing the fight, it felt to me that Galadriel arrived to a new found realization after hearing his next words.

“I know your mind. The door is still open,” He said to her.

I believe she was reminded of her own words from before,

“He knows my mind….And I know his. Which is why I must face him. Why I alone can slay him”

Therefore when she declares “The door is shut.” I believe it is actually in reference to something that we wouldn’t initially think of.

In truth I believe she shut the door that had allowed him to enter her heart and locked it up tight so he could never see her deepest hopes and desires again. Effectively blocking him from her vulnerability, not her conscious mind.

(Then we get to the moment where she kicks him in the face which was so satisfying tbh. I’m hoping that in season 3 that we will be given a clearer understanding of this ‘Mind Palace’ that they share.)

That statement marks a definitive shift in their fight. She’s much more precise and has a purpose for each attack. I believe this might be why Sauron didn’t block that kick to the face, he not only didn’t expect her to do that, he wasn’t even able to anticipate her attacks now because he was still “play” fighting. When she slices his cheek that’s when he stops playing around and we see how quickly he “ended” their fight.

I think this theory is further supported by the fact that we literally saw how Sauron was telepathically talking to her (was literally in her mind!) and still didn’t see a thought or intention to fall off the cliff cross her mind.

He no longer has access to her vulnerability and heart, because she closed that chapter on their story from before to allow a new one to begin. One where she is the Lady of Light, he the Dark Lord and how they will always be connected.

Thank you so much for your nice words !

I think it's a great analysis of the fight scene. I think I realized that before but had never put it into words before, even in my mind, but you're probably right about the meaning that Galadrel gave to these words ! I think the fandom at large takes this claim "the door is shut" way too seriously, because it was said in the heat of the moment, when she was angry and determined to cut him off her life (and indeed, her heart) for good. She had no idea what would happen next. Sauron hadn't stabbed her with Morgoth's crown and gained a direct line to her mind yet. He had never telepathically talked to her or anyone else before, so there has to be a connection imho.

I may have a slight disagreement about your conclusion regarding Galadriel's fall, though. I'm actually very much convinced that Galadriel didn't pretend that she was going to give Sauron Nenya, precisely because since he had access to her mind, she shouldn't have been able to do that. I think he really had a hold on her for a few minutes, thanks to the bond he had just created.

And it's exactly why, imho, he didn't anticipate what she would do : because he was sure that the connection worked, and that he had her. It's not the first time that Sauron was too sure of himself, and it won't be the last. She very suddenly found the will in her to snap out of it, and there was not enough time between the moment he realized what was happening, and the moment Galadriel let her fall off the cliff, for him to react fast enough to grab her hand.

She managed to catch him by surprise because he was, indeed, not expecting it all. I think it could also be related to the probable fact that the notion of "self-sacrifice" is completely alien to Sauron : he would never do that, so he can't fathom the idea that anyone would. Basically, his lack of empathy could be what caused him to lose control of the situation, and to let her fall.

[redinkofshame]

JSYK just because I don't write it/post it, doesn't mean my thoughts aren't still filled with Solavellan smut on the daily. So when I saw this perfectly innocent comic my thoughts... Wouldn't leave me alone. So here, smut be upon ye.

Keria Lavellan x Solas (in the head of) x purple!mRook

🍋 explicit

Two-and-a-Half-Some

“Nice tits, by the way.”

Rook had led Keria to one of the bedrooms in the Lighthouse to show her a sketchbook full of images of herself. Unlike the rooms they’d passed on their way up, full of sentimental knickknacks and evidence of camaraderie and constant use, this room was all but barren. Clean. Sparse.

Solas’ room.

It made her heart ache, to see how alone he’d been all this time.

She raised her eyebrow at the younger man, who flushed. His expression wasn’t flirtatious so much as ‘I can’t believe I said that out loud’.

“…Sorry.”

The poor kid. He’d clearly only been trying to make a joke to ease the tension of the moment when she’d flipped from a series of tasteful nudes to… Some positions that left little to the imagination.

At least he hadn’t commented on the appearance of her anus.

She shut the book. “Don’t be. They were pretty nice back then. His sketches are a bit outdated now, though. I’m not as young as I once was.”

Rook’s eyes went unfocused for a moment, and then he said, “He, uh, he says your hard-won wisdom only makes you all the more beautiful today.”

Her breath caught in her throat. She swallowed, heart thudding. “He always was a sweet talker. It’s true then. You can hear him?”

He nodded and pointed to his temple. “Yep. Whether I want to or not.”

“And he can hear what you hear, obviously. Does he see through your eyes?”

He nodded.

“Interesting…” She took a step closer to him and raised her hand suggestively to the toggles of her shirt, designed to be easy to use one-handed. “Would you like to see an updated version? For the sake of improving the accuracy of the sketches, of course.”

His eyes went wide. “You… Want to show me your tits?”

She smirked. “I want to show Solas my tits,” she clarified. “You getting to see them is just an enjoyable side-benefit.

As long as you’re comfortable with it, of course.”

“Who in their right mind would say no to seeing the Inquisitor’s tits?” he asked, and she almost laughed at his incredulous tone. Then he added, “He’s, uh, unusually quiet. He’s not going to, like, turn me into a statue for this or anything, right?”

“He was never the jealous type,” she assured him as she began unfastening her shirt. “What about you? Any partners that would have a problem with this?”

“No. Well, partner yes, but no, we’re, uh, open to…” He trailed off, watching her hand distractedly.

She finished with the last toggle, but pointedly didn’t remove her shirt yet, waiting for him to answer.

“We’re not the jealous types, either,” he said quickly once he caught on. Then he jerked his thumb towards the door to the rest of the lighthouse. “I could go get them?”

She did laugh at that, shrugging off her shirt at last. “I think two and a half is enough for now.”

He didn’t answer, focused on her exposed skin. She arched her back prettily and ran a hand over herself, teasing her own taut nipple.

“Wow. Definitely still great.”

Keria had never though of herself as beautiful — at least, not until she’d seen the way Solas looked at her when they made love — but she’d never been particularly self-conscious either. She was surprised that some small part of her preened at the younger man’s approval.

She closed the distance between them and gently took his hand and placed it on her breast. The warmth of it and the way it moved timidly over her had her flushing with sudden need. “And can he feel what you do?”

“Who? Oh, uh, no.” Growing bolder, he had both hands on her now, kneading her breasts, thumbing her nipples delightfully.

“That’s a shame.” She ran her hand over the bulge of his britches as she said it and his breath staggered. Then she pulled back. “Unsurprising, though.”

She started on the fasteners of her own pants and Rook watched, waiting for an indication of what came next, like an eager little puppy.

Once Keria was fully nude she did a slow spin, giving both men a fully view of her decade-older body.

“I can’t understand what he’s saying,” Rook told her. “It’s elvhen. I think it’s poetry.”

“Elvhen always sounds like poetry,” she said said, affection tugging her lips and memories of him reciting beautiful words she didn’t understand while he held her against him.

She went to work on the laces of Rook’s pants, and got on her knees once his erection was freed.

Solas was always dedicated to her pleasure when they made love, rarely allowing her to do the same for him. He couldn’t stop her now, though. So she took her time and made as big a spectacle as she could, maintaining eye contact with this stranger whose head held the love of her life. She stayed focused on those eyes as she ran her tongue along Rook’s shaft, then twirled it around the head, as she took him deep, as she left long trails of saliva whenever she pulled back. Neither man said anything she could hear, though Rook’s groans were satisfying.

When she felt she’d teased enough, (and that Rook might not last much longer,) she pulled back and stood, swaying her hips artfully as she moved to the bed. She climbed on and mirrored one of the positions in the sketchbook, half-propped against the headboard with her knees spread wide.

He continued to stare after her as she stroke her slick core, displaying herself. She wasn't sure if his glazed look was from trying to hear Solas speak, or simple lust.

“Rook,” she said finally. “Take off your clothes and come here."

He jumped to it, almost tangling himself in an attempt to remove both his pants and shirt at the same time, half-tripping as he removed his socks while getting on the sheets. She used a hand on his jaw to guide him over her, in case he got confused about that, too.

He knelt between her legs and took his time admiring her, and she wondered if it was Solas that told him to run his hands up and down the insides of her thighs, to try gripping her hips and waists in different spots, to cup her breasts again. She whimpered with heat by the time Rook ran the head of his cock up and down her folds several times, wetting it before finally plunging into her.

She kept her eyes open and on him when normally she’d have closed them to enjoy the full feeling, the friction, the energetic thrusting his hips against hers. But though it felt odd to look so deep into a stranger’s eyes as he fucked her, she wanted Solas to see her.

Fortunately, the man spent most of his time watching his cock moving in and out of her and her fingers circling her clit, or her bouncing tits.

Then there was a flash, a flicker of blue spirit light, and suddenly his thrusts became pounding, movements becoming equal measures controlled and intense.

She gasped. “Solas?”

“Mah vhenan,” he breathed in the wrong voice, and then he was kissing, biting, sucking on her neck as he moved in her.

Her hand moved to his head but it was wrong, the hair was wrong, so she gripped his back instead and closed her eyes so she couldn’t see Rook anymore, just Solas, her Solas. She came almost immediately, the tension in her releasing with waves of pleasure rushing over her.

He rode her through her climax and then slowed, still, and kissed her. He hadn’t finished, still hard in her as he kissed her harder still. His tongue teased hers, plunging deep, like he couldn’t taste enough of her. She wrapped her arm around him as tight as she could, kissing him with a decade of frustration and longing.

When they pulled back for air she kept her eyes firmly closed, and perhaps he understood because he pulled out and she was suddenly moved, turned over so she was positioned on her knees. She arched her back exaggeratedly, still putting on a show for him. He ran his hands along her thighs, grabbed handfuls of her ass, ran fingers through her folds as he lined up his borrowed cock. He gripped her hips with both hands as he plunged into her, and she moaned his name, and, “I love you, I love you, ar lath ma.”

Whatever he said in breathless elvhen was lost on her as he pounded into her again and again, taking her like an animal. When she came a second time she finally felt his movements become less controlled, insistent and clumsy as he chased his own climax as last.

His movements slowed, stilled. She stopped propping herself up on her shaking arm and allowed herself to collapse on the mattress, and he came down with her.

“Are you still in there?” she panted.

“Yes, vhenan.” For some reason part of her was still surprised the voice was wrong. He rolled them onto their sides and she gripped his arms hard around her, unwilling to let go.

“How long do you have?”

“Not long.” He pressed feather-soft kisses against her shoulder. Then he sighed. “But I can’t leave before I tell you how sorry I am. For everything.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she said, unwilling to waste this precious moments on his constant guilt. “Var lath vir suledin. I’m going to find a way to save you.” To free him from his prison in the Fade. To be together in this new world he’d made.

He kissed her shoulder again, and she thought it sounded like he was smiling when he replied, “I know.”

I know. Not ‘I know you will try’’. Just ‘I know’. He believed her.

“Solas…” she started, but she trailed off.

It didn’t feel like him anymore. Somehow, she knew he had gone.

“Rook?” she tried instead.

“Uh, yeah” he said as he awkwardly pulling his limp dick out of her. “I’m back.”

Keria bit back her disappointment to put on a satisfied smile as she turned to face him. He looked like he didn’t know what to do with himself. “Hey. You doing okay? That was… Unexpected. I didn’t know uncontrolled horniness could lead to a spontaneous possession.”

He laughed, and settled back comfortably. “Yeah, neither did either of us.”

She ran her hand along his chest. “Are you feeling okay about it? I just want to check because we didn’t discuss the option before hand.”

He nodded. “Definitely. I think… I think I could have stop it? The possession. It felt weird, kind of like a build up of pressure, but I think I could have stopped it.”

“Why didn’t you?” As a mage she'd been taught to protect herself against possession her whole life. She couldn’t imagine just letting it happen.

Rook shrugged. “I wanted to see what would happen.”

Her mouth was open, but she couldn’t think of a response to that. At last, she shook and said, “Varric said you’d be trouble.”

He grinned. Then, looking a little apologetic, he said, “I was ‘there’ the whole time, you know. Like, I could still, uh, feel everything.”

She made sure to smile comfortingly so he’d know she wasn’t upset by this. “Side benefits indeed.” She kissed him — Rook, not Solas. He deserved to feel wanted, too. “Thanks for the tour of the lighthouse. Glad to be part of the team.”

[estrellami-1]

If I Should Stay

Tread lightly, folks. Discussions of past cheating, which is kinda par for the course for these two. Also, please keep in mind I do not condone Nancy’s actions in the least, nor do I fully believe Joyce has the best intentions for Nancy. It’s not conscious, mind you, but subconsciously, she’s always gonna want to her help kids first. Big gray area here.

Part 1 | . . . | Part 66 | Part 67 | Part 68

Joyce tugs Nancy in even more securely. “I know exactly what you mean. But no one here is like that. I think, this time around, he’s done an excellent job of surrounding himself with people who actually care about him.” She runs a hand over Nancy’s hair. “And you’re part of that group. Regardless of what you want to call what you feel for him, it’s obvious you care. It’s okay to need to take some time, but in the end, when you’re wondering what’s next, just remember he cares for you too.”

Nancy nods. “I think I do need some time,” she murmurs. “It just feels like he moved on so fast.”

“Because it’s not been as long for you,” Joyce nods. “I get it, honey. Take all the time you need. Want Jonathan to keep you company?”

Nancy looks at her. “D’you know who I cheated on Steve with?”

Joyce smiles softly at her. “I do. And trust me, I’d have something to say to him about it later if he’d known you two were still together.” She inclines her head toward Nancy, brows raised, gaze serious.

“Oh,” Nancy whispers, eyes dropping. “I didn’t know that.”

“Mhm. But it’s in the past—well, the future past, I guess—and you can take as long as you need, okay? But I do think someone deserves an apology.”

Nancy sighs. “You’re right.” She picks at the hem of her pants, then nods and stands up, hands on her hips. “I need time. But I need to apologize first.” She just as suddenly deflates, nerves coming in fast. “Will- will you come with me?”

Joyce smiles up at her. “Of course I will. C’mon.” She stands too and offers Nancy another hug, which she gratefully accepts. “I’m proud of you,” she murmurs.

“Thank you,” Nancy whispers, pulling back and squaring her shoulders as she stares at the house.

They walk up together but Joyce walks in first, Nancy following just behind. “Steve?” She asks timidly. “Can I talk to you?”

Robin and Allison both stiffen, but Steve waves them off as he gets up. “Outside?”

“Steve-” Allison starts, but he holds up a hand before turning to her.

“I’ll be fine,” he says softly. “We’re just gonna talk.”

He walks outside with her, Joyce hovering by the door, acting both as support and as a lookout.

“I’m sorry,” Nancy says forcefully, like it was pulled out of her. “I shouldn’t have gotten so upset, you broke up with me, and you really didn’t owe me an explanation but you gave me one anyways, even if it hadn’t actually happened yet, but I… I got insecure. And jealous. So I’m sorry.”

Steve nods, shoves his hands in his pockets, looks down. Scuffs his shoe along the concrete. “I get why you’re upset,” he starts cautiously. “But I thought we were okay. And to find out we’re not…” he lets out a harsh breath. “I do still care for you, Nancy. You’re one of my best friends. But I think I’m gonna need some time for this one.”

Nancy looks down at her own feet, wrapping her arms around herself. “I don’t think I took as much time as I should’ve,” she admits. “Can you count me out of this one?”

Steve manages a smile. “Yeah, I can do that.”

“And-” she squeezes her eyes shut, lets out a shaky breath. “Jonathan too, maybe?”

“I-” Steve takes a breath, stops himself, looks wide-eyed at the ground before letting out a long, controlled breath. “Yeah. I can do that.” His words are barely a whisper, and he lets out another short, harsh breath before brushing past her. “Excuse me.”

He lets himself back inside, and Nancy stands there, wide-eyed, staring through the spot he’d been standing in.

Then, Nancy Wheeler breaks.

The tears come in strong and fast, and she’s crumbling where she stands before strong arms catch her. “It’s alright,” Joyce whispers in her ear. “It’ll be alright.”

She lowers them both to the ground and lays Nancy’s head on her shoulder.

“I- I don’t get it,” Nancy sobs. “I did the right th-thing and I f-feel terrible!”

Joyce hushes her. “I know, dear. Sometimes the right thing feels terrible in the moment, but is best in the long run.” She runs a hand over Nancy’s head. “Did you drive yourself?”

Nancy nods. “And M-Mike.”

“Okay. Do you think I could drive you home and Jon could follow in our car? That way he can stay with you and I can come back here.”

Nancy nods and look up at her. “C-can you m-make sure Steve’s okay?”

“Of course, dear. Come on, let’s get you home, okay? And I’ll even give you my mom’s recipe to heal a broken heart: a warm cup of tea, a good cry, and a good night’s rest.”

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[gayf1hoe]

Part 3

As he closes the door behind us, he turns around to face me and I speak up. "What are you-' before I finish he grabs my face and begins to passionately kiss me pushing me towards the bed until I feel the wooden frame against my calves. He pushes me back without breaking the connection between our lips, I can taste the alcohol in his saliva.

As he begins to snake his hands up my top I break the kiss and pull his hand from underneath my t-shirt. "Max, stop" he looks at me puzzled "Why?" He questions drunkenly. "You are drunk out of your mind, why don't you get some sleep".

I stand up from the bed and help him navigate around the room to the bathroom. We all knew that this night would end up in everyone being inebriated so we decided it would be best to stay on the boat. After he emerges from the bathroom in shorts and a t-shirt I hand him a glass of water and help him into bed before leaving him.

I decide to head back up the stairs to the main saloon of the boat where Lily and Kika are still sitting where they were when I left them. "What was all that about?" Kika asks. "Oh nothing he just wanted me to help him find his room" I respond rather unconvincingly and I can tell they don't believe me by Lily's comment, "and that took you nearly an hour". I feel my face blush with nerves, it has always been my sign that I'm not telling the truth. Their facial expressions change into a look that interrogates me without them saying a word.

"We may or may not have had a little kiss, that's all", they simultaneously gasp and then Kika turns to Lily and says "you owe me €50".

I'm puzzled, "What do you mean?" I add.

"Well we always knew you weren't straight so we bet on who you would have a thing with, I bet Max and Lily bet Ollie" Kika answers.

I turn to Lily and exclaim "you think I would have a thing with Ollie, he's nice and all but not my type".

We spend ages discussing the whole 'story' between me and Max and I quickly get to know them on a much deeper level and they are no longer just Pierre and Alex's girlfriends. They have such a genuine interest in my life it feels nice and validating that I am actually somewhat interesting.

At 2 AM pretty much everyone has gone to bed except me and Daniel who is inside whilst I'm sitting on the bow of the boat taking in the serenity of the night sky. I hear him approaching as he sits down next to me. "How are you?" he asks "Why does everyone always ask me how I am, do I look sad all the time or something?" he laughs "chill it's just a natural greeting".

There is a monetary pause before he starts speaking "How are you and Max going?", I feel confused "We aren't going at all, we are just friends".

"Don't bullshit me, I have seen you two together you can't keep your eyes off each other and you and Max were gone for a while this evening". "Fucking hell Danny your like a fucking spy".

"I don't know how it's going honestly, I don't think I'm ready for a relationship just yet I need to focus on my performance and being myself first".

He nods in agreement and places his arm around me and we both just stare up into the night sky which is populated by a multitude of stars. We spend a while just in silence yet it's not an awkward silence it's a comforting one. We part at 3 AM and I am the final one to go to bed.

Drifting off to sleep as the gentle lap of the wave gently rocks the boat it doesn't feel long until I am awoken by the sound of a cacophony of cheers coming from above where the main deck is. I toss and turn over and pull the cotton sheets over my head and attempt to get some sleep. However, it's abruptly ruined by Max bursting into my room and slamming my door shut.

"What the actual fuck" I exclaim.

"Sorry Charles is after me, I tried to push him in the ocean but it failed so he's after me".

"Yes but what if I didn't have any clothes on or was on a private call" I retort

He approaches me and places his hands in my hips as by this time I have stood out of bed barely conscious of what's going on, and he whispers "Maybe it would be better if you didn't have any clothes on" as he leans in their is an thunderous bang on the door, it's Charles and he knows Max is in here.

Max makes his way over to the door and pleads with Charles not to harm him, it reminds me of a sibling rivalry that actually stems from love rather than hatred.

Time quickly passes and I grow more impatient. I just want to go and eat food so I push Max out the way and open the door causing Charles to stumble through the door. They both look at each other whilst I'm between them and I see that I have to be the mediator in this situation and relay words my mother used to say to me, "if you can't play nicely together don't play at all".

Trudging up the stairs to the main deck I'm the last one to get up there except for Charles and Max who are probably below deck murdering each other.

I take a seat next to Zhou and grab some fruit and a glass of water and try to catch onto the conversation that everyone was having.

I learned the plans for the day are to spend some time just chilling and catch the flight over to Saudi Arabia. It doesn't sound like the most enjoyable or eventful last day but it's not the worst.

After a while Chalres and Max come back up and sit at the table. Max makes a personal request to Zhou that he move so he can sit next to me, Zhou not wanting to get on the wrong side of the current F1 champion willingly obliges.

We leave the port of Melbourne, but we don't go far, only about 2 miles where we are far enough from the docks to do things like jet skiing and diving. I have never been one for the sea, I'm not scared of it but I hate the salty water that gets in my eyes, dries my skin out and makes me feel all disgusting.

I sit on the sun deck partly engrossed in my book and partly engrossed in conversation with Kika and Lily.

All of a sudden Max comes over with Charles and George and they all grab me and lift me up and essentially dangle me over the edge of the boat. "Put me down motherfuckers" I shout, but they don't listen. Instead they drop me, I fall 15 feet from the top deck and plunge into the tepid sea. I emerge and see all 3 of them peering over the edge "you are all dead" I swim over the swim platform and get helped up by Zhou and Yuki. My clothes drenched in sea water, my book ruined and my eyes stinging. Whilst it may have been a joke I can't really see the funny side of it. Kika hands me a towel and I take off my clothes and wrap the towel around me and head down to my room to change into some clean, dry clothes.

I head back up to the top deck and the 3 idiots are sitting there waiting for me but I ignore them sitting back in my previous spot. Max tries to make conversation but I blank him, so does Charles followed by George but I do the exact same thing. However when Zhou comes up I immediately make conversation with him and see Max being perpetuated by anger.

They eventually get the hint and walk away leaving us to get back to what we were initially doing. That's when Kika turns to me and asks "How long are you going to be mad at your boyfriend?"

"Until he apologises" I reply. 

Time flies by as most of the drivers are out on jet skis or diving off the boat and before I know it we are back at the dock and heading off to the airport. I choose to sit by myself on the transfer bus, I have Max and Daniel in front of me chatting away.

Halfway into the journey Daniel turns around and tries to include me in the conversation but I politely decline on the basis I won't speak to Max until he apologises to me, but given his stubborn nature I don't expect it to be any time soon.

The private airport is much smaller than the grand scale international airport of Melbourne, there is only a singular plane stationary on the tarmac which is ours. Our luggage had been sent forward by our teams already, so we step straight onto the plane and try to locate the nearest empty seat, which just so happens to be by the window.

All the other drivers pile in taking their seats and I see Max making his way towards me, I instantly feel my blood pressure begin to rise. He stops and looks at me."Not a fucking Chance" I declare. He however disregards my comment and sits down next to me the smell of his cologne gently intoxicating my nose.

The first proportion of the flight is spent in total silence. Max has made the odd attempt to commence a conversation but hasn't gotten anything out of me.

"You know it was so funny seeing you climb back on the boat soaking wet". I don't validate his petulant comment with a reaction because I know that's exactly what he wants.

The flight goes pretty smoothly. I fell asleep halfway into it meaning I avoided all conversation with Max.

We arrive in Saudi Arabia at 11 AM local time for the 3rd race of the season however unlike the first 2 we don't have a break instead it's back to racing right away which I'm kind of glad about, I don't like sitting around doing nothing.

I drop my stuff off before heading out for a run, but before I head out I quickly check social media and see Max had taken a photo of me whilst I was sleeping and posted it. It's like this man wants me to be more pissed off at him.

Setting off for my run I play music obnoxiously loud and zone out. I don't really track the direction I'm running in, the hot sun that is beating down on me causes waves of nausea as my core temperature increases by the second.

Thankfully I run into a street stall selling drinks, I sit down on one of the stalls benches and engulf the drink in basically a few sips. I try to recover my depleted energy for the run back and after 45 minutes I manage to find that energy. The run back is much slower but more enjoyable and I manage to find a good rhythm that doesn't exert my body as much as it did before.

I arrive back at the hotel drenched in sweat, I walk in and I am greeted by Max who is sitting down typing on his phone, "Hey, you good it looks like you've been sprayed with someone's garden hose", "I'm good, not that my well being is of concern to you".

"What is your problem?" He asks. "Are you going to apologise for throwing me 15 ft off a boat?" he scoffs, "is this what you ignoring me has been about? It was a fucking joke Y/N, I'm not apologising for it?". "Fine, but don't talk to me until you are prepared to apologise."

 

It's race day and me and Max haven't spoken all week, it's been quite tense. If anything the problem is we are both as stubborn as each other and refuse to give in to one another.

The others have started to sense something is off when given that we have been far apart from each other for the entire week. George and Charles have since apologised and George even replaced my book so we are all good and back to normal but Max is refusing to back down but so am I.

"Y/N 30 seconds until lights out". Sitting in P2 I intently wait for the lights to extinguish and manage to get a good start but not as good as Max. He instantly gets ahead of me and I am in no good position to try and fight him so I just focus on defending against George.

At turn 5 Max is a bit hesitant causing me to get ahead of him but by Turn 7 he gets right in front of me again. Pushing the car to its absolute limits doesn't seem to do much in terms of catching up to Max but it manages to fend off George.

Coasting into lap 4 I receive news from my engineer: "Y/N Vertsappen is going to be retiring due to mechanical issues, Russell is behind 1.2 seconds".

It kind of puts me at ease knowing I'm in P1. It's a comforting feeling that I have missed. The race is going really well. George has been preoccupied with defending against Carlos that he hasn't been trying to catch up with me.

"Y/N box, box"

"Copy box, don't mess up this pit stop like you did in free practice"

"We will try not to"

Entering the pit lane I'm preempting a disastrous pit stop like they did in FP2. But to my genuine surprise it is a regular pit stop.

I manage to come out just behind Carlos but I don't worry, knowing all the drivers infront will have to box soon anyway.

I keep well within distance of him and they all eventually end up in the pits bumping me back up into P1.

The final lap is tight: "Y/N Russell behind with DRS", I can see him constantly attempting to make a move on me and it takes every ounce of knowledge and wisdom to hold him off from overtaking me.

"Y/N final sector, Russell dropping back 1.1 seconds"

Commentary: "In his 3rd race Y/N L/N may just go on to win the Saudi Arabian Grand Prix and this could be the exact boost Sauber was looking for. He said he never intended to settle for last and he has held on to first place like his life depends on it.

His teammate Zhou Guyanu has just made a last minute overtake on Charles Leclerc as he locks up.

Saubers last win was in 2008 they could really use this win. And and all their prayers will be answered as Y/N L/N crosses the line in first place and for the first time in his F1 career he is a Grand Prix winner, I'm sure Sauber will be elated with that result"

"Y/N P1, P1 that was an amazing drive for both you and Zhou, the standings are looking really good for us excellent result"

"Guys amazing result couldn't have asked for anything better"

I had truly missed the feeling of getting first place, it has truly been ages since I felt like this and I have missed it.

I ecstatically jump out of my car in parc ferme and get weighed before jumping into the crowd of team members and embrace them all in a hug. I thank each and every one of them for making my dream come true of being a grand prix winner.

After a while I walk over to Gunther who is waiting with a microphone.

Gunther: Y/N first race win in F1 how does it feel?

Y/N: Well as you can imagine it feels pretty damn good achieving this not only for myself but the entire team.

Gunther: What do these points mean to you and the team?

Y/N: Well as I'm sure you are aware when you have a team that is in the bottom of the standings any points even if it's just one means a lot so 25 means the world and this is a testament to the hard work the team has put in.

Gunther: Max has DNF'd in the past 2 races has that been an advantage for you?

Y/N: Ermm... I would say having one less competitor on the track makes it a little easier

Gunther: The standings are currently you, Lewis then Charles, which is quite different to the past years. Do you have your eyes on the championship?

Y/N: At the moment no. I'm just focusing on maintaining progress and ensuring the team is in a good position.

Gunther: Lastly, you are only 7 points ahead of Mercedes so does this close gap worry you?

Y/N: No, we aren't in direct competition, we just want to improve the car, improve the standings and ensure we make progress.

Still on a high from talking to THE Gunther Steiner I head over to the podium to prepare to celebrate, when my engineer hands me a note, I open it:

"I know you are mad at me, and I'm sorry, I wanted to say well done for today, I'm really proud of you - Max"

I smile knowing that I have won, and that he is proud of me I step up to the podium and stand on the centre piece which is first place and feel that feeling of ecstasy of winning that was almost foreign come flooding back and as it does so I look down and see a smiling Max, getting a sense of Deja vu from Australia.

[iobsessoverfictionalmen]

Dark Paths Into The Unknown (2)

AN: This chapter is a continuation of this fic here. Likes, reblogs and comments are very much welcomed and appreciated!

Warnings: mentions of drugging, spitting, kidnapping, hitting and stealing.

The rocking motion of the van would have been soothing if Sharon could move.   Whatever the mortician had injected her with was powerful and her limbs refused to obey her panicked commands.  She also felt more sleepy than usual as a result of the unknown drug. 

Being constantly on the run interfered with Sharon’s sleep schedule to the point that if asked about it, she’d reply “What sleep schedule?”   The last thing she felt before she drifted into an unwilling sleep was a spark of admiration that you had managed to evade both these men for as long as you did.

Sharon’s eyelids fluttered open as she felt herself being lifted.  Her vision was fuzzy and it took her precious moments to realise that she had been placed into a wheelchair.  The metal felt cool under her heated palms and the air around her was cooler as the sun slowly slunk towards the horizon.

There was one small upside to the situation Sharon found herself in.  The drug had worn off and neither the mortician nor the detective had injected her again; whether that was intentional on their part and they had something more sinister planned or because it had genuinely slipped their minds Sharon didn’t know.  She was more inclined to believe the former as the two men who had kidnapped her didn’t seem like the type to forget something that important.

“They had to have made a mistake.  Even if it was a small one otherwise (Name) wouldn’t’ve been able to escape them.”

Low murmurs caught Sharon’s attention and she strained to hear what they were talking about but the conversation cut off abruptly as Eliot turned to face her and realised that she was conscious.

He knelt down opposite her and Sharon wished that her arms were just a tiny bit longer so that she could smack the insufferably calm and controlled expression off his face.

“The relaxant wore off exactly when I thought it would.  How are your limbs feeling?”  He inquired mildly.  “I would expect that they would be tenser than they’ve been for a while.”

“I was right,” Sharon thought fighting the horror that bubbled up in her chest, “They did it intentionally.  They might want the thrill of the chase but only with her.   In a weird way, that’s probably them acknowledging that she is worth their efforts and attention.”

Sharon’s great aunt had always stressed the value and importance of possessing restraint.  Right now, Sharon wished she hadn’t heard that particular speech thousands of times.  The impulse to spit at Eliot’s face was nearly overwhelming.  “I am Sharon Carter and I have standards.” She reminded herself repeatedly until the impulse subsided.

The night air swept over her again but this time, Sharon’s nose caught the scent of stale chips, bleach, rust, gas and artificial air fresher.  Twisting her neck, Sharon was able to identify the van she’d been transported from the forest in.  Now the van was parked in front of a gas station.  “Well, that explains the smell at least.”

Eliot and Chandler strode confidently into the small store, leaving Sharon by herself with her palms resting on the arms of the wheelchair.  Sharon heaved a sigh when she heard the door open and close automatically behind the two powerful men and then she tossed her head back so that it was resting close to the handles of the wheelchair.

“It’s hopeless.  No one knows I’m here which means that there’s no hope of being rescued.  By SHIELD or Sword or anybody else that I once counted as an ally.  And they’re so calm, confident, and charming that no one will quest-”

At precisely that moment, the lights of the store behind her dimmed before shutting off completely and Sharon heard the door lock click into place automatically.  A small jolt of relief shot through Sharon until she realised that while she had been temporarily separated from the two men, she had no way of escaping their clutches permanently; once the power came back on she would be at their mercy once again.  A small voice in the back of her mind added that her imprisonment might even be worse because the two men would believe that she had something to do with the power outage.  They’d be wrong but it wouldn’t matter.  Even if they found out the truth, Sharon doubted that it’d change anything.

A squeal of tires and a cloud of dust, dirt and gravel pulled Sharon from her tumultuous thoughts.  She stared in wonder at the car that had appeared.  Sharon had just enough time to grab the smallest glimpse of the driver before the car span around in a circle and the passenger door swung open.  “Get in!” You screamed so that Sharon would be able to hear you since she couldn’t see you because of the dust cloud separating the two of you.

Sharon could hear the door rattling and she didn’t dare look behind her because she feared that she’d see Eliot and Chandler were close to forcing the door open.  Ignoring the way her limbs shook in protest, Sharon propelled herself one of the wheelchair.  She ran as if the very best of HYDRA’s agents were on her tail.  You slowed down until the car stopped completely.  The upside to that was that Sharon had a clear path to the car.   The downside to this was that you and the car were now completely visible.

Her legs were on the verge of collapsing and her lungs were screaming for air when she drew level with the passenger door.  To her horror, she heard the door of the gas station slide open and she knew that Eliot and Chandler were gaining on her with every passing second.  They were taller and in better physical condition than she was.  Mustering her remaining strength, Sharon tensed her legs and dove into the passenger seat.

You spun the steering wheel, creating another cloud of dust, dirt and gravel which forced the detective and the mortician to freeze in their tracks.  There was another advantage to the high-speed movement.  The passenger door, which had still been open, swung shut with a tremendous bang.

The engine groaned as you pressed your foot down on the accelerator however, it shot forwards obligingly and Sharon’s fingers grappled for the seat belt.  “When did you graduate to grand theft auto?” Was the only thing she managed to stammer out after she had buckled herself in.

“Let’s see.” You mused thoughtfully with more than a touch of sarcasm, “Carry the one, minus the four, add the six.  Since, mind your business.” Sharon felt she deserved much more than that if she were being frank with herself.  Her exhaustion caught up with her and this time, she surrendered willingly to sleep’s comforting and welcoming embrace.

[strangeterrain]

Interview with Anthony Green retrieved from DecoyMusic.com (February 2005) (x) Anthony Green of Circa Survive by Kazy Brown

Put your audience’s conscious at ease and tell us your feeling about Saosin? I love that band. That first album and the music will forever be etched in my mind. It will sit in my memory as meaning so much to me. It was hard to explaining to them that I wanted different things than them. But, I had to do it. I had to do it for myself and for them. They deserve the best. Cove is an amazing singer. I’ve met him, spoken with him and he’s an amazing talent. They’re going to be huge. I’ve heard people say that Cove is “ripping me off”, but I couldn’t disagree more. He doesn’t rip me off. He does his own thing. He loves my style, but his talent is bigger than anything I could have dreamed up. And as long as the band is doing things for the right reasons then I believe they can accomplish anything. As long as the music speaks for itself and nothing else then Cove will be going places. He is a whole-hearted human being. I believe in them.

What goes through your head when an audience member requests, “Seven Years” or any song from the Saosin?

I’m honored. I’m sincerely thankful. They’re into my music. I can’t believe it sometimes.

What do the other members of Circa Survive think of that?

They’re all down. They know what’s up. We’re all very tight as friends. We all know what the deal is. We know why we are where we are. And we all respect it. Those guys will never try to boost my ego. That stuff was phenomenal and I was stoked to be a part of it. I wanted to go in a different place; they wanted to go their way. I love them.

Have you spoken to the old members of This Day Forward? What do they think of Circa Survive?

They’re really proud. They all have their own thing. We have mutual respect. Contrary to popular belief everything is extremely positive.

There were audience members singing songs that haven’t been released tonight. They had obviously downloaded leaked songs. How much does that bother you?

I don’t mind at all. Period. I’m not at the point where I’ve ever made any money from this. But whether I have or not isn’t the point. The point is- I love looking behind me and knowing how important this is. If the audience recognizing this commitment, then I don’t give a shit. As long as they love my passion as much as I do, I don’t mind.

What is it like going from a headlining act to an opening act? It must be exciting, right?

It’s strange, but in the greatest way. There are so many new faces out there that make me feel warm and accepted. Whether they like it or not I’m going to jump into them and I hope they’re ready for it.

Is the singer of Circa Survive a completely foreign person to you?

I don’t know him, never met him. I’ve heard a lot about him and seen pictures, but I’ve never met him. In-between songs I’m a confused little boy, but equally excited. When we play- I’m shut off. I have no idea who that guy is. I’d love to speak to him, though.

Tell me a little bit about working with Brian McTernan?

Oh. The best experience ever. We spent three months writing and record ourselves in our basement in Philadelphia. And that is all we did. We came into the Brian’s studio fully prepared. The second we got there he was experimenting with the sound. Initially we were very attached to our original writing, which made it strange. But the second we got working we gave in immediately to his ideas. He is a genius and we are utterly grateful to have spent the time with him.

Growing up how important was it for you to write your feelings down and express them musically? What do you attribute to who you are today?

Growing up I was in local bands, but always had self esteem problems. I had issues with who I was and who I wanted to be. What I wanted to be was a good person. Someone who cares about other people and cared about himself. And as I grew up I didn’t like whom I was. I was losing touch with who I was and what it took to be the person I wanted to be. I knew that the best way to make my family and myself proud was to be the best singer I could possibly be. Because that’s all I wanted to do. And now, my parents are very proud of me. The best part is- they’re proud of me because they know I’m happy. When I was with Saosin and in California I was calling them every week telling them how big this thing was and how happy it all made me. Deep down, the music was fun, but I wasn’t really into the whole screaming and singing thing. At least I hadn't been since I was a sixteen listing to Closure, Shai Halud and Quicksand. But as I got older I started listing to Paul Simon, Dredge and Bjork. That stuff hit me in a deeper place because of its sincerity. When I examined the elements that represented integrity in music I looked into myself. The thing that makes me the person I am today is my family. They showed me peace, spirituality and love.

When you listen to music what is more important to you- music or lyrics?

Lyrics. Honestly. Only because I write so much and have such a deep appreciation for it. Music initially grabs me, but lyrics draw me in. I pick a part every line of every song and analyze it. It’s important to become critical aware of lyrics often times because lyrics are so overlooked.

What do you think of your fans? Saosin, Circa Survive and otherwise?

I love anyone who is into the music. When people take it a step too far by getting into the fashion and personality, that's when I shut off. I have a difficult time embracing fans that love the side effects more than the actual music. Listen to music, not artists. Let the art speak for itself.

What happens if this album hits #1 and goes straight to TRL?

I don’t think it will ever happen, whether it does or not I’m stoked. I love doing this. As long as I’m doing this and the fans enjoy what I’m doing then I’m happy. If things did get big I certainly wouldn’t want to abandon playing small venues. I love reaching out and feeling a connection. That's important. Me physically connecting with an audience is important. It makes me realize that this is real and equally important to them as it is to me. That’s all it’s about.

Anthony, I can’t thank you enough. It was a complete pleasure.

Thank you. This is one of the better interviews I’ve done. I had a great time. Circa Survive loves Decoy.

[chiiyuuvv]

falling for 'ya ★

&team x fem!reader 4.8k words

notes! bonus points if you can guess what song the title is from. ANYWAYSS can you believe this took me four whole months to write?? yeah i was cooking up a storm, happy thanksgiving yall

brief warnings for each member (i was aiming for about 200 words per member but i got carried away.. :/) k (yudai) mentions nightmares. fuma's has food. nicholas is a meanie but reflects on himself dwdw + has some cursing. euijoo is my fav mentions stress about studying. yuma has some cursing if you consider that to be. jo was proofread by the amazing @slytherinshua !! tysm for helping me <3 harua's has some side characters that are a lil mean.. maki is my second fav great OKAY HAPPY READING MWAH

▸ 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺?

yudai  (roommates)

“Yudai,” your head peeps into his room in the middle of the night, your tremulous tone signifying whatever you need may be urgent. “Can I come in?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” yudai repeats, jumping out of bed as he walks toward you with caution. “What's the matter?” He grabs your hand and pulls you into a hug, his chin resting on top of your head. Hugs from yudai were always rare as you usually tense if he tries to initiate anything, but this time you accept it, melting into his embrace as your eyes squeeze shut.

“What's the matter?” Yudai repeats in a softer tone, a hand coming up to run his fingers through your hair, the other rubbing your back at a slow pace.

“I had a bad dream,” you state in a whisper, your eyes still shut as the boy begins to rock your bodies back and forth.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You shake your head no. “Do you want to lay down?”

“In your bed? It's fine, I can just go back to mine and leave you alo–”

“Go lay down, I don't mind,” yudai shushes your rambles, dragging and tucking you into his bed before doing the same for himself, his hand coming back to rub your back. 

You share a moment of silence, your soft breaths the only thing being heard as your eyes droop shut. Yudai smiles, a strange, yet familiar ping in his heart as he watches you sleep. “You're.. you're pretty,” he admits, although he was sure you couldn't hear him, your mind in dreamland. 

Maybe yudai will tell you again when you're conscious, but he doubts it, lost in his feelings before his eyes close. 

fuma  (brother’s best friend)

“Hey,” your feet dance down the stairs, leaning against the wall to eye your brother and his friend having a conversation. “Can you guys keep it down? I’m trying to-”

“And my sister’s here too!!” your brother cuts you off, waving his hands around as if he's trying to prove a point. “Come on, you should totally do it.”

“Do what exactly?” you question, annoyed. You were supposed to be upstairs studying for a test, not getting wrapped up in whatever mess yudai’s in. Your arms cross with a sigh. You didn’t mind your brother having company, but the least he could do was be quiet enough to keep your concentration. 

“My super duper, amazing, handsome best friend over here,” yudai pauses after each compliment, pointing his finger at his victim that he’s trying to butter up, “is going too..” his voice trails off dramatically, wiggling his eyebrows, “cook us a meal!!” your brother finally yells, lifting up his hands in excitement. 

Well that wasn’t what you expected. You thought yudai was trying to convince his friend, fuma, to run around the neighborhood naked or something. This was rather tame.

It didn’t seem like fuma found this tame, though, as he stuffs his face into his hands, shaking his head as he whines out a no. “Yes!!” yudai yells, “you’re literally the best chef ever!” Despite being chaotic, you thought your brother was being really sweet. He points to you, “remember that time he made those sunny side ups?”

You nod your head yes, “and they were amazing, right?”

“They were really good,” you chime with a sincere smile on your face.

“See! Everyone loves your meals, so that’s why you should cook for us tonight!” yudai beams as you nod in agreement, before your face drops.

“I actually need to get back to studying..” you mutter but yudai doesn’t let you go so easily.

“But you’ve been at it for hours. Come take a break and eat some great food made by my dearest friend, yeah?” His question sounded more like a demand as he pats the spot on the sofa next to him, while shooing fuma off to the kitchen. You sigh in defeat as you go to sit beside yudai.

“What if it’s gross?” fuma stands up, voicing his doubts. 

“That’s impossible. Now go, go, go!”

“You got this!” you cheer fuma on along with your brother, fist bumping the air. Fuma smiles at the playful energy being created, before walking to the kitchen with pride. You were sure he was going to ace this, he could do anything after all.

And boy did he.

Fuma unravels his apron as he stands up straight, wiping some sweat from his brow. “So?” he looks at the dinner table and you two expectedly, raising an eyebrow. You were sitting quietly in your seat, already in a daze at how good the food smelled.

Eating it was a completely different experience. “Fuma..” yudai slams his fist against the table. “Fuma, fuma, fuma, I'm going to kiss you,” you would have laughed at your brother's reaction if it wasn’t true. “Marry you, actually,” he corrects himself, taking another bite.

Unable to say anything, you eat rather messily, stuffing your face with the food as your toes curl in pleasure. You never considered yourself a sloppy eater, but the sauce smeared alongside your lips says otherwise. Able to find words again, you look up to find the male already looking at you, stifling a laugh.

“You’re so cute,” you hear him whisper, wetting a cloth before standing in front of you, gently tilting your head to wipe the mess from your face. Fuma’s fingers felt soft against your skin, a hum leaving your lips as you closed your eyes in bliss, leaning into his warmth. 

Fuma wanted to scream like a fangirl. 

A blush arises to his cheeks as he clears his throat and walks back to the kitchen, busying himself by washing the equipment he used. Something about the way you acted towards him felt so adoring, his heart soaring high. He couldn’t tell if what he’s feeling is platonic or romantic. 

When you first started warming up to each other, fuma felt happy he managed to make a potential friend. You would laugh at each other's dumb jokes more, or share items with each other without a second thought. Fuma knew he was special when you refused to do the same with your brother. But now he's questioning your interactions. Were you feeling something, or was it all platonic love? 

After today’s incident, fuma feels the former. He can’t get your cute expression out of his head, a giggling leaving his lips as he dries off his hands. 

“Fuma!!” yudai’s voice breaks his thoughts as he looks over to his best friend jokingly on his knees. “Please, please, please make more food for us in the future,” yudai sticks out his bottom lip as he pleads, but fuma’s eyes land on your figure instead. 

Unbeknownst to all the noise, he finds you licking your plate clean. You realized there was no more food as you stopped, a frown on your face as you stared at the dish like it would magically spawn more chunks of deliciousness. Fuma felt his heart crumble, a sudden need to put you in his pocket and show you the world from his point of view. 

“Yeah,” fuma chuckles, a huge grin plastered on his face in adoration. “I’d love to,” as long as he was feeding you, that is. But he doubts that would ever be a problem. 

nicholas  (academic rivals) 

“Nicholas..? Mr. Wang?” The said boy paused his speech, his words stuck in his throat as his eyes locked with yours. Guilt painted him although he had no control over the circumstances. He wasn't supposed to feel this way – he was supposed to win with a smirk quipped on his lips.

You were having a debate, the class splitted up into two groups to convince the teacher why their point mattered more than the other. Nicholas’s table was already in the clear after watching how badly yours struggled. Or how you struggled. Your group was made up of slackers, causing you to do the entire project by yourself. Not to mention showing up late to class due to sleeping past your alarm, the teacher scolding you in front of the class. To say your day was terrible was an understatement.

Taking that into consideration, he regrets purposely bumping into your shoulder when getting into groups, or tripping your feet as you were walking to the front of the class to present. He knew he would be fuming if the same thing happened to him.

“Since nicholas is no longer with us,” the teacher said, half jokingly, “group b is forfeited, giving the win to group a.”

“What the fuck, man?!” Nicholas is pulled from his thoughts when he feels his best friend, euijoo, push his shoulder. “We could have won! Why did you freeze?”

“I don’t know,” the boy stammers, blinking his eyes like he saw a ghost. “I was talking and then I wasn't,” euijoo sighs in defeat, before walking back to his table. Nicholas does the same before stopping, your team cheering gaining his attention. Unconsciously, he turns his head the same time you do, your eyes meeting once again. He could see the visible confusion in your gaze, while you could see something else, but you weren't too sure what it was.

“Nicholas!” Euijoo shouts, signaling him to sit down. He shakes his head no, “I'm going to the restroom,” a flimsy excuse leaves the students lips. He needed to get out of there, he felt sick.

As nicholas walked out of the class and down the hallway, you found that the perfect opportunity to run after him – confront him. This wasn't the nicholas you knew, if anything he would have taken your despairs to his advantage. He would never coward away from the chance of winning.

“Hey!” Your heavy footsteps make the boy stop, your hands on your knees as you pant from your little run. “What was that for?” Nicholas turns to face you, his cool headed demeanor trying to turn on, but it seemed like his facade was chipped. 

“What was what for?”

“You know what I mean,” you snap, rolling your eyes as you brush strands of hair away from your face. His arms cross as he takes in your appearance. Sure, you threw on random clothes after waking up late, but nicholas still thought you looked pretty. Your hair was kept in a messy bun, your cheeks rosy and lips chapped. Wait.. have you always looked like this?

“Nicholas!” You wave your hands in front of his face in annoyance. “What's up with you lately? You keep zoning out,” you question, feeling strange on how his eyes keep lingering to yours. He only does that to stick his tongue at you, not a trace of longingness in his gaze.

“You had a rough morning, so I decided to let you win, happy?”

“But why would you care about that–” nicholas turns his back on you, continuing his walk to the restroom without any final words, leaving you stunned in place. “Weird..” you mumble to yourself, what has gotten into him?

Adjusting his shirt one final time, euijoo makes his way to the front door. He opens it with a smile once he realizes you were already standing at his doorstep. “Hey–”

euijoo  (friends)

“I'm so sorry for bugging you this late in the day,” you cut him off, an unsatisfied look on your face. You feel as if you've hit rock bottom from the amount of stress school has been putting on you lately, the never-ending assignments becoming unbearing. Not to mention important exams happening soon; there was so much pressure to do everything correctly.

“You aren't bugging me,” euijoo reassures, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before his hand lingers against your cheek. “I'm happy to help you study,” he says in a gentle voice as you look up at him with gratitude, leaning against his warmth.

“Thank you,” you wrap your arms around his waist for a hug. He feels something blossoming in his stomach as he returns the gesture. It felt weird, but a good kind of weird, if that made any sense to the poor boy.

…

“I'm so proud of you,” euijoo whispers, more to himself after watching you go through the study guide with ease. His hand falls on top of yours as he stares at you, loving the way your skin felt against his. Euijoo felt like he was in a daze whenever you were near, but it never fully registered until now.

“I wouldn't be able to do it if it weren't for my amazing tutor,” you answer with a smile, a giggle leaving your lips when you watch euijoo bashfully look around the room, waving his hand to shoo your words off.

“You're just flattering me,” the table breaks into a chuckle before going back to silence. 

“Can you help me with question 30?” Your serene voice breaks the quiet, your words like a melody to a lovely song. 

“30?” He repeats, scooting his chair closer to yours as his head hovers over your shoulder to get a better look at the problem. “Ah! It's the same formula as number 5 but instead of subtracting after the second step, you add,” euijoo explains, giving small pointers here and there before concluding his tutorial. 

“Do you need help with anything else?” The boy asks, looking up only to have his breath sucked into his lungs. He didn't realize he was so close to you, the way your breath and sweet perfume fanned his face made his heart skip a beat. Not to mention how your eyes stay glued to his lips, the action luring him to your figure.

His hand holds the back of your neck to pull you closer while yours rests on his shoulders. Euijoo watches as your eyes slowly flutter shut, your noses bumping against each other as you close the distance.

Ding!

A notification from your mom stops euijoo from kissing you, breaking the intense moment, “I'm so sorry, I.. I–”

“No, it's okay,” euijoo tries not to stutter, though he knew you'd be understanding considering your face was red from embarrassment.

“I’ll.. see you tomorrow,” you rush out, euijoo getting one final glance at you before you disappear, hearing the front door open and close seconds later. What.. What just happened?

yuma  (enemies)

“What did y/n do this time?” Yuma’s friends gather around the lunch table, tuning in for the usual slander. 

“She stole my pencil,” yuma frowns, rolling his eyes as he stuffs a fry in his mouth. He mumbles, “she's so annoying,” earning nicholas's attention.

“Last time I checked, she's pretty nice,” nicholas defends, “she offered me notes when I was sick.”

Yuma tchs, clearly irritated. “Well, you don't know her like I do.”

“What does she do?”

“She,” he huffs, anger provoked by just the thought of you. “She keeps sending me this teasing look. You know, she does something to piss me off and then she puffs up her cheeks like a squirrel, it's hideous.” Yuma pauses to take a sip of his drink, but his eyebrows raise when he hears a snicker. “What are you laughing at?” He sends maki a look, the said boy using his hand to shield his mouth as he speaks.

“Can you,” he pauses to chew the rest of his food, “describe the teasing look a bit more? I’m just trying to picture it in my head is all.”

“Oh.” Yuma replies. “It.. it looks like mochi. It gets all rosy when she smiles, and then her eyes shrink. It's honestly–”

“Cute?” Taki cuts him off, the table erupting in laughter after they made yuma fall into their trap. “You don't blush when talking about your enemy,” taki continues, watching as yuma hides his face in realization.

jo  (classmates)

jo looked like a baby without his mother, a pout on his lips as he nuzzled his head into his arms. He felt himself shiver in the well air conditioned classroom, almost like his usual warmth booked for vacation and left without further notice.

“Hiya, jo!” A joyful voice calls out in the gentle sound of students talking to one another, the said boy lifting his head to identify who was talking to him. His eyes land on the students classic bunny smile, coming to realize it was harua, someone he befriended in the class. Or should he say one of your friends?

“Y/n’s not here,” harua notes, pulling a chair in front of jo to sit and placing his bag beside the table separating them.

“Yeah..” jo says, feeling awkward as ever. Even when he was around someone he was comfortable with? It's like his confidence was low on battery, adverting back to his old, quiet ways. 

For context, jo was known as the introvert of the class. Each and every conversation he's ever had were cut short with a small hum. It's not like jo hated to be alone; he enjoyed his quiet time. He loved eating his lunch in peace, the birds and insects his entertainment as he feasted. He loved plugging in his earbuds to listen to some soft tunes. jo loved being away from the toxic gossip and judging eyes. He felt happy in his own bubble.

That was until your teacher decided to rearrange the seating chart. Now, he was seated next to you, the extrovert of the class. You loved making new friends and being the center of attention, the complete opposite of what jo was. Although you were much louder than jo, you still respected his space, settling on small hellos and goodbyes because you still wanted him to be included while everyone treated him like a ghost. You were just too kind.

He still remembers his first proper interaction with you. The teacher was asking questions to the class, and when it was jo's turn he wanted the ground to eat him. Although he had the correct answer, he fumbled his words, looking like a complete idiot. Everyone was laughing at the poor boy, his ears red from embarrassment as he lowered his head, letting out a sigh that was loud enough for you to hear.

You were laughing too, but if jo remembered correctly, it was a different type of laugh from the crowd; an endearing one. “He means the answer is 24,” you speak up for jo, a sweet smile plastered on your lips as you let out more endearing chuckles. jo was still embarrassed, but he felt a little better when you stood up for him, patting his back with reassurance.

Ever since that episode, you swept the boy under your wings, introducing him to the chaotic yet lovely social life. He's met all your friends and surprisingly gotten along with them super well (take harua for example). He rarely ever eats lunch by himself anymore, and his earphones were left at home after he stopped using them for an entire week. He's a new person, all thanks to you.

But without you, he's back to square one, and he hates it. He hates the silence, he hates doing things by himself, he hates being away from you. It's almost like you adopted him, and now he's grown attached. He likes your presence, he likes it when you reassure him, or when you help him with a problem he already knows the answer to. Say he even likes you, but that's too weird, isn't it?

“Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry for being late!” Almost coincidentally, you bust through the doors, your voice breathless from running to class.

“What happened?” Harua looks up from his worksheet, looking at you worriedly.

“There was this massive car accident on the highway,” you inform, a sigh leaving your lips to emphasize the size. 

“Hey, jo,” your eyes lock with the said boy mindlessly staring at you, patting his head as a greeting before taking off your bookbag and sitting next to him.

“Hey..” jo stutters, shyness swallowing him whole as the only thing he could do was clear his throat and look away. You and harua share a confusing glance, before harua continues with his work.

“Number 5 is D by the way,” you whisper, leaning closer to the boy. jo swears his heart stopped, butterflies swarming in his stomach when he feels your warm breath against his cheeks.

“Thanks,” jo didn't realize how much he was sweating the more you stared at him, and you seemed oblivious to the effect you had on the boy.

“So, what did I miss?”

harua  (love at first sight)

“AHH!”

Your scenic moment comes to a stop when you hear a foreign sound that is different from the usual hollers of delightment from the playgrounds. You sit your book down and straighten your back, forgetting to mark your page as your big sister instincts turn on. That sounded like your little brother.. WAIT A MINUTE

You jump up and out of your sitting position, your feet having a mind of its own as they run to the direction of the sound, landing you in front of the crime scene.

Your brother stands alongside the slides with a little girl around his age, his tiny fists balled up and tears clumped against his eyes to showcase his anger while the girl folds her arms, refusing to look at the boy.

“It was my turn to slide down!”

“You've been hogging the slides for hours!” The youngers bicker amongst one another before a voice halts the commotion.

“Guys, stop it!” Your head turns to find a boy that looks to be the same age as you, a frown on his face as he takes the little girl's hand and pulls it so they are standing next to each other. You assume that's the girl's older brother. 

“I am so sorry about her,” the boy turns to face you, bowing at a 90 degree angle apologetically.

You return it, “no, I should be apologizing about this stinkabutts behavior. He had no business hogging anything anyways.”

“HEY!”

Your lip twitches at the comedic value, the older boy uncurling his back as he looks at you. You watch as his pupils dilate, a small gasp leaving his lips as his ears paint pink. He immediately looks down at his sister, seemingly trying to avoid eye contact. What, did your breath stink or something?

“I'm hot,” the girl gazes up at the boy with a pout.

“I'm hot too,” your brother chimes, giving you the same treatment. You hear a sigh leave the boy's lips as he pats his sister's head before turning to you. 

“They're both humid, so can I take you guys out for ice cream?” He gestures to you and your sibling with a smile, his ears still pink.

“Can we? Can we? Can w–”

You groan, “yes, we can.”

… 

“It seems they forgot about their quarrel,” you break the placid silence with a chuckle, watching as the two run along the path leading to the nearby ice cream parlor.

“Yeah,” the boy returns the chuckle, looking down to conceal his smile. You learned his name was harua, who indeed was your age. He seemed to be a shy person, answering in only short responses. But you could tell he was engaged, looking out of the corner of your eye as he stole glances at you. It was an adoring sight.

“You know,” you break the silence once more, getting the boy's attention as he hums. “I like you.. we should definitely talk more.”

“I agree,” harua smiles wide, no longer trying to hide his joy. His hands busy themselves by fishing his pockets, finding his phone. “Could I call you?” he asks, opening the device to go to his contacts.

taki  (fake dating)

You grin, “absolutely.”

“What are you two giggling about?” yudai stops in his tracks when he sees you and taki tucked off in a corner. Taki would whisper something in your ear, only for you to snicker in return. Yudai found it very suspicious to say the least.

“Oh, nothing,” taki turns to face yudai’s direction, before swiftly interlocking your fingers together. Your head rests against taki’s shoulder, the said boy giving your forehead a peck. 

“Oh my god, oh my god.. is it finally happening?!” Yudai hyperventilates, his hands coming up to his hair in stress.

“Does it look like it?” Taki replies and you shrug, before yudai runs away, shouting, “THEY'RE FINALLY DATING!!”

“And..” you hold out the word, making sure yudai was out of sight. “Scene! I can't believe they're actually falling for this,” you burst out laughing, looking at taki to see him wiping tears from howling.

“This is the greatest prank of all time,” taki says before pausing to share a glance, chuckling again. “Who should we prank next?”

“Uhh.. oh! Yuma and Jo, they went to that new pizza restaurant. And plus, I'm really hungry.”

“You're always hungry,” taki teases, before grabbing your hand again. “Shall we go, pretty?”

“Shut up!” You slap his arm before walking to your destination.

… 

“So I slashed the dragon, right, thinking the boss fight would be over but a chest popped out of the dragons heart and–” taki's rant about the latest video game stops when you turn his head, your fingers delicately wiping off the tomato sauce smeared on the corner of his lips. 

When your eyes lock, you finally realize your actions and the lack of distance between you two. Your head whips back to your plate of pizza from embarrassment, while taki stays in his original position, frozen in place.

While you were having your k-drama moment, you seemed to forget you were in public.. with yuma and jo sitting in front of you. The boys send each other a look. Something wasn't right.. if you were dating, you wouldn't have such a shy moment, right?

“Anyways,” yuma breaks the awkward silence and jo clears his throat. The table goes back to it's usual banter, but there was an obvious border between you and taki. 

Was this what the other members were referring to? When you're with the person you like, and the noises buzzing in your head goes dead? But it confuses taki because he doesn't like you, you're his best friend. His shoulder brushes against yours when the table goes quiet, your eyes locking for the second time. Instead of cowering away, though, he offers a tiny smile, inching his hand back to yours to hold.

The warmth from taki’s skin immediately swarms your cheeks, butterflies forming in your stomach as you finish the rest of your food. You knew taki was still acting to prank the others, but for some reason it didn't feel like a joke. No, it felt real.

maki   (childhood best friends)

Maki’s fingers hover on the phone screen, the green call button looking eager to be pressed, but the sigh leaving his mouth stops him in his tracks. He didn't know what was wrong with him, he didn't know why he missed you so bad.

It was revealed maki would leave the country to travel to Germany – which would only last a couple weeks considering he was visiting family – but he feels as though he's been separated from you for years.. although it's only a few days of his adventures.

Should he call you? He doesn't want to come off as clingy, and everytime he looks down at his phone a hard lump forms in his throat. But he hates being alone, the loud silence in his room making him feel uneasy. Maybe a simple text could cure things?

Ding!

A notification pops up, pausing maki's thoughts as he glances at his device. You were calling him! His lips curl up as he answers the phone, pressing it against his ear. 

“Maki!!” Your voice beams. For a second, he can feel the hard lump forming again. “Maki..?”

“H-hey! Yeah, I'm here. What's up?” He silently shames himself from the random stutter, shutting his eyes in embarrassment.

“Nothing much, just thought I would say hello before going to bed.” Oh right, he forgot about the timezones. “How's your family doing?”

“They're fine. You know, they were actually upset you weren't able to come along this time.”

You gasp, “really?!”

“Yeah, I guess they aren't the only ones missing you,” a chuckle leaves his lips as he plays with his fingers, not fully registering what he said. “Y/n?”

“You.. you miss me?” 

“I um, yeah!– no, uh well–”

“I miss you too, maki,” your soft voice manages to freeze time, his heartbeat accelerating after each word. “I have to go, but I'll call you tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah.. see you tomorrow,” he ends the call, breaking out of his trance. The room goes back to silence, his shaky breaths filling up the air. Maki places his hand against his chest, stunned his heart was still skipping beats. Why was he blushing? Why were you the only thought in his head?

Maki falls back on his bed, his eyes boring into the ceiling as he ponders to himself. Why does he feel like he just ran a marathon? No, a better question: what is he feeling?

Love. He doesn't know it yet, but he's fallen in love.

︴bonus! this was 12 pages on google docs btw.. phew. so happy i finally finished this bc it felt like the world was on my shoulders. now i can write the other things i have planned and focus on my little big project :> until then!

▸ taglist 📬 @rizzkisworld , @cherrycolaberry , @kehnarii , @wtfisgoingright ,

@slytherinshua , @luvnicho , @enhacolor

🎬 navi

@chiiyuuvv on tumblr . do not steal works/headers/line dividers

[itsdanii]

Rejecting you and regretting it

genre: angst to fluff

warnings: slight cursing, rude behavior (resolved), do message me if I forgot any.

ft. sakusa kiyoomi, tsukishima kei

Sakusa Kiyoomi

you're not oblivious to the fact that kiyoomi is a very conscious person

that's one of the things you loved about him

he was hygienic and he always made sure that his health was his utmost priority

but one downside is that kiyoomi had the tendency to push people away because of his straightforwardness

you were used to it and in fact, you were one of those people he tolerated

but everyone has their bad days

and unfortunately for you, today was kiyoomi's and since you were always attached to him by the hip, he unintentionally snapped at you

what's worse is that he snapped at you the moment you confessed to him

"Omi!" you shouted happily as you entered the gymnasium, giving Komori a small wave before making your way to where Kiyoomi was sitting.

He looked at you with a frown. He wasn't wearing a mask since they were training awhile ago and only took a quick break. "Y/n, what are you doing here?"

You sat beside him making Kiyoomi grimace and slightly move away. You frowned at him, completely displeased at the action. "I just wanted to give you a visit. Plus, I have something to tell you."

You started to fiddle with your fingers nervously. You practiced your confession several times already but doing it seemed harder than you thought.

"What is it? Talk, I'm not in the right mood to socialize right now."

Out of panic, you quickly blurted out a rather loud, "I like you!" You immediately covered your mouth with your hand and stared at him wide eyed.

The other players looked at you with sympathy, knowing what's about to happen. Out of all days, you really had to confess today, when Kiyoomi was in a pissy mood after several fangirls pushed themselves against him this morning, not minding his personal space.

Kiyoomi stared at you with a serious expression before standing up. "I don't like you. Leave."

"But Omi.."

"You're irritating and you always bother me when it is clear that I don't want your company." He turned around and left you on the bench, your head casted down in humiliation.

You whispered a small sorry before running out of the gym with tears falling from your eyes.

For the next few days, you did your very best to stay away from Kiyoomi. You changed your route to school knowing that your usual route meant that you have to pass by his house. Even if you got scolded several times for being late, you did not stop.

You sat near the door so you can easily exit the room after class. You even stopped eating with Komori and Kiyoomi during breaks and lunch. Even your usual routine of visiting the gym during practices was stopped.

At first, Kiyoomi didn't mind. He knew that you'd come back in a few days just like you always did. You like him after all, right?

But when a few days turned into weeks, He started getting bothered. Why weren't you pestering him like always? Why did you stop visiting him? You said you like him, right?

It was the second week that Kiyoomi took action. He woke up extra early to wait for you infront of your house, aiming to confront you about your behavior.

When you went out, your eyes widened slightly upon seeing Kiyoomi waiting for you outside. He was wearing his face mask while staring at you intently, letting you know that he purposely waited for you.

You looked down and was about to walk pass him when you felt him tugging on your wrist. Your gaze snapped to his hand, not believing that he was indeed touching your skin.

"Sakusa?"

His eye twitched at the weirdness of you not calling him like usual. Sighing, he stepped a little closer to you, hand still holding your wrist to ensure that you won't run away from him.

"You're ignoring me," he said while eyeing you. "Why?"

You took your hand from him and furrowed your brows. "I'm just doing you a favor. I don't want to be a bother anymore. Isn't this what you wanted?"

"I-"

"It's fine, Sakusa. You don't have to force yourself to apologize just because you feel bad or obliged to."

He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I'm not apologizing because I feel bad."

"Then what? You're apologizing just to make fun of me? I know I said I like you but that doesn't mean that you have the right to-"

"You don't get it!"

At this point, you were both raising your voices. Some passersby were looking at you two weirdly, some even running as to not get caught up in the fight.

"Get what, Sakusa? Why don't you tell me so I can understand?!"

"I like you!" Kiyoomi exclaimed. "I... Fuck. I like you, okay? I wasn't in the mood when you confessed and I rejected you without thinking. I messed up. The moment I saw you walk out, I knew I fucked up real bad and I-"

"Om-"

"And I thought that you'd come back the next day to bother me again like usual. I wanted to apologize but my pride-"

You sighed as he continued to ramble. With fast movements, you stood on your tiptoes and encircled your arms around his neck to pull him down to you, kissing him over his mask.

When you let go, Kiyoomi was silent. His eyes were wide and you thought that you went over board. Panic made its way to your face as you try to find the words to explain.

"Sorry, I didn't me-"

This time, he was the one to cut you off. Kiyoomi took off his mask and bent down to kiss you on your lips. One of his arms snaked around your waist to support you while the other settled on your nape, angling you to him.

"Be my s/o."

Tsukishima Kei

Everyone in Karasuno knew how much you like Tsukishima

In fact, you remind him everyday

You often give him fresh strawberries from the market and even bake him strawberry cake

Sometimes, you would put little sticky notes on his belongings and write some encouraging words like "you can do it", "I believe in you" or "take it easy!"

On his birthday, you even gave him a hoodie with a dino design (which he secretly loved)

There are times that you knew Tsukishima gets irritated when you visit and even snaps at you but you didn't mind. You liked him and a small snap will not discourage you

But what you didn't know was that it would only take one conversation to completely shatter your heart

"-And they're back," Sugawara said as he saw you enter the gym, a bubbly smile present on your face as usual.

"Kei!" You skipped your way towards Tsukishima and handed him his water bottle which you voluntarily refilled with hot water.

He only gave you a 'tsk' and took the water bottle. Adjusting his glasses, he stared at you from head to toe as if analyzing you, a small blush appearing on his cheeks.

"What are you looking at? Have you finally come to realize that you like me back?" you cheekily asked, poking his bicep.

"No. I was just wondering how someone could look so ugly."

Despite what he said, you forced yourself to giggle, covering your upset feeling with an eye roll. "Oh shut up, Kei. You don't have to hide it, you know? Don't worry, I'm not going to reject you."

You winked at him causing Tsukishima to blush even more.

The rest of the boys snickered and laughed at his reaction which made Tsukishima more embarrassed than he already is.

"Just confess to the girl already, Tsukishima. Can't you see she's trying hard to win you?" Daichi said with a small chuckle while patting Tsukishima's back.

Tsukishima just huffed and pushed his glasses up. "What's there to like? They're nothing but an eyesore anyway."

"What?" you asked in disbelief.

Having a playful banter with Tsukishima was normal in your routine but this was the first time he called you such an offensive term. Does he really think of you that way?

"Oh come on, stop acting dumb. I don't even get why there are guys running after you. I mean, there's really nothing much to look at, right?"

Everyone grew quiet at what he said, clearly not expecting Tsukishima to be at such level of rudeness.

You swallowed the lump forming in your throat as your insecurity skyrocketed. "I try hard every single day to look presentable to you. I-"

You paused for a moment to laugh pathetically at yourself. "I exert a lot of effort to make you notice me. I cook for you, I give you gifts. Heck, I even stay after class to help clean the gym so that the task would be easier for you and I'm not even asking for anything in return."

Tsukishima glared at you sharply that you immediately felt extremely smaller than him. "I never asked you to do those things for me."

"Can't you at least show me that you care?" You wiped your tears with the back of your hand. "Because I'm slowly getting tired of this push and pull game."

"Don't you get it? I don't like you. Why don't you stop pushing yourself to me and start getting a life, hm?"

"Tsukishima, that's enough!" you heard Daichi yell at him.

"Y/n?" Sugawara was immediately beside you, his hand rubbing circles on your back in attempt to calm you down.

"No-" You lifted your face up to meet Tsukishima's eyes. "I think he's right. I should stop being a nuisance and focus on myself."

"I'll leave you alone. I'm sorry," you said before giving Tsukishima a bow and leaving the gym with everyone's eyes following your figure until the door shut.

Everyone could only look at Tsukishima as he cursed under his breath.

"Shit."

The moment you left the gym, you headed straight to the comfort room to let your tears out. You stared at yourself on the mirror as tears cascaded down your cheeks.

"You're beautiful," you reassured yourself while pointing at your own reflection. "What he said doesn't make you any less. Know your worth."

You wiped your tears and splashed your face with cold water before getting out and heading to class without sparing Tsukishima any glance.

You ignored Tsukishima, stopped visiting the gym and focused on yourself. You even made made friends with some of your classmates that you didn't bother getting associated with last time because you were too focused on capturing the attention of Tsukishima.

Unbeknownst to you, a certain male was eyeing you as you interact with other people. He blamed himself for pushing you away. He didn't talk to you, thinking that you only wanted space for a couple days before bothering him again.

He knew that what he said was out of line and he regret everything he did. He even asked Yamaguchi and the rest of the team for advice but all of them responded with the same answer - apologize and tell you how he feels.

Tsukishima gripped the pen tightly as he watched you laughing at something your classmate said. The said classmate was too close to you and it was obvious that he was trying to flirt with you.

"Tsukki?" Yamaguchi called out. He followed Tsukishima's gaze and sighed. "Why don't you go and talk to them?"

"Tsk. Why would I do that? Can't you see they're enjoying his company?" Tsukishima bitterly said.

"You'll end up losing them if you don't do something about it now. Who knows, they might already be lo-" Yamaguchi stopped as Tsukishima instantly stood up and made his way to where you are.

Taking your wrist, he pulled you towards him, heading out of the classroom.

"Tsukishima, what the hell?!" You tried to resist but his grip on your wrist only tightened.

You gasped as he suddenly stopped, trapping you against a wall with his arms beside your head.

"I'm sorry." Tsukishima closed his eyes, balling his fist as he bowed his head. "I said hurtful words to you and no amount of apology will take those away but I want you to know that I regret every single one of it."

You bit your lower lip as you felt yourself tearing up once again. "Do you really think that I'm ugly? I was hurt, Kei. It's just.."

"I'm sorry." His hand made its way to your cheek, cupping your face while he wiped your tears with his thumb. "You're not ugly."

You shook your head and averted your gaze from him, a sob escaping your lips as you felt yourself falling for him deeper. "Don't. Just stop. I'll accept your apology but please just leave me be. I won't be able to stop my feelings for you if you keep leading me on."

"But I don't want you to stop."

"What?"

"I've fallen for you." He tipped your chin up with his hand making you look at him and you were surprised to see the vulnerability in his features. "Please look at me again, y/n. Keep loving me because I swear that I'll do things different this time. Give me a chance."

You can't help but encircle your arms around him, burrying your face on the side of his neck as you nodded repeatedly. "One chance, Kei."

Tsukishima hugged you tightly, lips pressing on the side of your head. "One chance." He leaned away from you and held your face with his hand, eyes boring to yours admiringly.

"You're beautiful."

Likes and reblogs are appreciated ❤️

[astaroth1357]

Hello I really love your writing. I’m glad that you decided to open requests for a bit. I have a personal headcanon that the boys are a lot nicer to MC then they are to everyone else. Could you do a headcanon of the boys being out with MC and they are talking with MC happily. Then a lesser demon sees them with MC and says that the seven brothers have gone weak and they aren’t scared of them anymore. Thank you again!!! 😖 (Also the way you write Levi is great)

Aww thank you!! Levi's kind of my favorite character (if that hasn't become painfully obvious) so I try to write him well, you know? This one was a little hard for me to write because I just have a hard time imagining Asmo and Beel as something intimidating to the masses, but I tried my best! I hope you like it!

Lesser Demons Think the Brothers have "Gone Soft…"

Lucifer

If anybody had something to lose by acting sweet on a lowly human, it was Lucifer. His entire image was built on the back of power and intimidation, so really who didn't see this coming?

He knew there were whispers… Mostly in the RAD hallways. Students would see him with the MC and gossip amongst themselves… 

"Did you see them together again in the courtyard?"

"How did some random human even score a pact with him??"

"And I used to seriously look up to him, too…"

He'd always silence their chitchat with a well placed glare, but this was a symptom of something more… troubling. A decay of his social image if you will.

Perhaps it speaks to how well and truly enamored he was with the MC that this proud creature didn't just dump them the second he started looking bad, but still… a part of him really couldn't stand for this...

So maybe it was a blessing in disguise when he finally got an excuse to establish his superiority yet again!

He and the MC were walking the halls of RAD after school hours and they had just made an amusing joke at the expense of of his brothers. Unfortunately, Lucifer collided into a lesser demon student while he was laughing…

On most occasions, he would have expected someone of such station to pay him deference then offer an apology - they had just ran into Lucifer after all - but the student just scoffed at him!

Lesser Demon: "Oi! Watch where you're going, Lucifer! Or were you too busy sucking up to that human to notice?"

This… was maybe not the best response to have (if the "Oh shit" look on the MC's face was any indication) but for as annoyed as Lucifer was, he was also somewhat delighted.

Finally, he had the perfect messenger for just how cruel he could still be!

Lucifer: "MC, feel free to go home without me for now and tell my brothers to save my dinner for later…" *starts pulling out his favorite rope with a cold, but pleased, smile on his face* "I have a feeling I'll be home late tonight..."

The MC left him and his unfortunate victim to their fate and Lucifer later came home in the night with his uniform in a bad need of cleaning...

A new body decorated the RAD entrance hall the next morning - swinging from the ceiling and making an awful mess on the floor - but still alive enough give a very important message to the rest of the students:

"Lucifer hasn't changed a bit…"

Mammon

So, not even lesser demons see Mammon as some kind of high-ranking badass… 

Just to be clear, he is, but it’s hard for him to come off that way when he's begging for his next Grimm... Then enter MC into the picture and he somehow lost even MORE cred.

"There goes poor Mammon… Did you hear he got tricked into a pact?"

"Just look at him nipping at the human's heels! How pathetic is that??"

"Well that's Mammon for you… What a shit excuse for a demon."

Like Lucifer, Mammon wasn’t immune to the whispers, but unlike his brother he was able to push them mostly out of his mind. People look down on him? Yeah, what else is new?

To be honest, he didn’t really feel the need to prove anything to a bunch of lesser demon losers… But insulting his MC takes things a step too far.

He and the MC were out at the Devil's Coast, "enjoying" some of the haunted house attractions and generally having a good time…ish. 

Any time they managed to make it out of one, the MC would have to peel Mammon off their back and hold him to assure him they were back to safety (a process he seemed to like enough to repeat the horror that precedes it).

It was during one of these calm down sessions that the two were accosted by a couple of snickering lesser demons, clearly looking for a fight…

Lesser Demon 1: "Hey look! There's the 'Great' Mammon and his little master!"

Lesser Demon 2: "Guess the master fits the demon… Of course someone like Mammon couldn't even score a pact with Solomon and gets stuck with the weakling!"

Lesser Demon 1: "Well how's the babysitting going, Mams? I bet you can't wait for them to kill over, can ya?"

Lesser Demon 2: "Careful! With his luck, they'll probably get eaten by the end of next week! Haha!!"

Now… an important thing to know about Mammon is that you can fling all the mud and stones you'd like at him… but never at his MC. That's just asking for a bruising...

Mammon: *smiling like usual, but his eyes are practically burning with rage...* "Yo, MC… I'm gettin' a little hungry. Can ya go find us a snack over there? I'll meet ya in a bit…"

MC: "Mammon, are you-?"

Mammon: "Don’t worry 'bout me, babe." *takes his glasses off and flashes a fanged grin* "This is'a piece of cake."

And indeed, it wasn't difficult at all. No matter how fast those demons ran, they could never out speed Mammon and he was looking to give more than a warning…

The MC didn't know what he did while they were waiting in line, but they heard the sounds of pleading go silent before Mammon turned back up with a nice bruise on his cheek. Oh, how they fretted and dotted on him…

Meanwhile, the haunted houses just earned themselves a couple new mannequins!… when rigor sets in anyway.

Leviathan 

Levi has a… mixed reputation in the Devildom to start with. People who only know him for his titles usually expect him to be some kind of sea-hardened badass. Those who meet him are… well let's say less than impressed.

This isn't anything new to Levi. It does take a blow to his confidence sometimes but even still most people aren't dumb enough to say something to his face… most people.

Unfortunately, "most people" have been getting bolder after seeing him with MC - because Demon Lord forbid Leviathan actually look happy for a change…

He and the MC were out and about for once. There was a raffle for exclusive merch at Anidaemon and he brought them along to boost his chances. They were grinning and chatting about anime but well…

The human couldn’t hear this, but he could - sensitive demon ears and all that. There were a couple guys who were tailing him… heckling him just loud enough that he was CERTAIN they knew he could hear them...

Lesser Demon 1: "Is that seriously Leviathan hanging out with a human? Isn’t he an Admiral??"

Lesser Demon 2: "Ha! The whole family's turned into simps, are you that surprised?"

Lesser Demon 1: "Wonder what the human's giving them that's got them all brainwashed…"

Lesser Demon 2: "Well... I've got an idea." 😏

If there were ever a reason for bile to fill his throat, it was now. He might be a shut-in, but those guys were the real creeps…

To be honest, Levi isn't one for public confrontation. Even with how gross and disrespectful those demons were being, he would have let it slide if they had just left it at that… but no…

He and the MC were browsing the ani-music racks in the store when those idiots popped up again. They hovered a while until they MC suddenly left his side to go find a store clerk.

When he saw the other demons move their direction, he naturally put himself between them and the would-be harassers. It was a little telling that despite his ticked off expression, the demons just laughed in his face!

Lesser Demon 2: "Hey look, the puppy's come out to protect its owner! How cute!"

Lesser Demon 1: "I can't believe you're that predictable, Levi… Do you really think we'd be scared of you?"

Well. That settled it.

When the MC came back, they found that Levi had moved from the music racks to the merch tables near the bathrooms. They didn't think anything of it… but...

One body was paralyzed by his venom and stuffed head first in a toilet while the other getting strangled by his tail just underneath the tablecloth… Meanwhile, Levi was cheerfully rambling about the raffle like nothing was happening at all.

Maybe they should have been a little more scared of the shut-in...

Satan

This may actually be a case where the rumors have a point… The MC has made Satan "soft."

Well, if "soft" means actually in control of himself, anyway. 

Satan would probably call their effect on him both a blessing and a curse. Though he loved finally having a handle on his inner rage, it flew in the face of a lot of his public image… and people were starting to notice….

"Do you think there's something off about Satan…?"

"I saw the human step on his toes earlier and he didn't even flinch…! The old Satan would have torn them apart!!"

"He's gotten way too nice all of sudden… Wrath shouldn't be nice."

Was it a little frustrating? Certainly. Especially for someone as image conscious as him. But for as calm as he was now, Satan wasn’t any less cruel and he'd be more than happy to remind others of that fact….

His chance came when he and the MC were together having just left the local art gallery. The two were exchanging a healthy dialogue about a curious sculpture they saw on display when a latte suddenly went soaring through the air and ended up all over Satan's sweater… The culprit was plain to see, being the only other demon on the road that night.

Whether the act was intentional or not, the correct course of action would have been to apologize immediately and beg for mercy forgiveness… but all the demon did was laugh in his face…

Maybe he thought that since Satan had mellowed out and his human was right beside him that he'd be lenient… Oh no. Not gonna happen.

Satan's fist slammed into the guy's mouth with the force of a jetliner and knocked him over two benches before his back bent over a lamppost… To say it was a KO move would be an understatement.

He probably could have done a whole lot worse to the guy while he was down, but you know… the MC being there and "self-control" and what not…

The demon survived (barely) and only had to spend a few months in the hospital, if anything he got off light.

Not a soul would gloss over Satan's temper again and really he preferred it that way.

Asmodeus 

Well, to be fair not a lot of people thought that Asmo was tough to start with… but that's also his intention.

"Scary" is the opposite of "cute" and he prefers to be "cute" at all times! 😊

Buuut that doesn’t mean this scorpion is without a stinger. He CAN be quite brutal when he wants to be, you just have to push him that far and trashing his looks is a good way to start.

Asmo was out with the MC getting his hair done for the week at his favorite salon. They weren't the only people there that day, obviously. There were other customers - one being a lesser demon classmate of theirs - though neither he nor the MC thought much of him at the time...

Well… It was supposed to be a prank. Probably something the guy intended to use for social media clout. While the staff was too busy to notice, he snuck by and replaced Asmo's preferred conditioner with pink hair dye…

Asmo. Was. Furious. And honestly, the dude could have gotten away with it if he hadn't been laughing and recording the whole thing!

When Asmo's ire naturally fell onto him, he hardly looked fazed!

Lesser Demon: "Ah, please! You won't do shit to me with the human still around! You don't want to look any uglier to them do ya?"

Asmo: *freezes, but still furiously eyeing every sharp instrument within arm’s reach* "MC? Darling?"

MC: "Got it..."

Perhaps the prankster should have kept his mouth shut, because suddenly the MC needed to take a looong bathroom break…

They didn't come back out until they heard the sounds of screeching and broken glass finally die down and then they stepped back into a warzone… Broken mirrors and items seemingly flung everywhere in a fit of rage! The guy (and his phone) now nowhere to be seen…

The salon comped Asmo for the botched hair job and touch up… and then billed Lucifer for the property damage (which he got an earful about later). On the bright side though, Asmo actually looks pretty great with pink hair! Silver-linings. 🙂

Beelzebub 

… The concept of Beel "going soft" is almost an oxymoron. He IS soft, but his personality was never what made him intimidating to start with.

Behind all his kindness, Beel packs more firepower than at least 4 for his siblings combined and most people remember that fact. Hell, the guy looks like he could lift a semi and he probably would if he ever tried. 

However, that doesn’t save him from being underestimated completely... Especially when an upstart or two thinks he's too nice to actually start a fight...

He and the MC were coming back from the grocery store with the usual armfuls of sacks when the MC accidentally walked into a lesser demon on the street. Since their arms were full, several items spilled out from the bags and onto the ground…

The MC was quick to apologize to the demon and try to get down to clean the mess, but the asshole just kept walking… and Beel really didn't like that.

Beel: "Hey! Aren't you going to say, 'Sorry?'"

The lesser demon hardly looked over his shoulder to respond.

Lesser Demon: "Why should I? That's your human. Take care of them yourself."

Well it didn't take long for some of Beel's bags to hit the floor so he could lift the demon up by the back of the neck properly. When he turned the guy to face him, he made sure to bring his face reeaal close so he could hear him growl...

Beel: "Apologize. Or I'll eat you."

And like that, the asshole's mood went from "Do it yourself," to "Yessir Mr. Beelzebub, sir!" right quick!

The MC didn't have to carry a single bag another step and Beel got to keep his free hand so he could link it with theirs!... all while Beel kept mushing their new pack-mule forward like a sled dog back to the House. Thanks, Beel! 😊

Belphegor 

Kind of similar to Asmo, Belphie prefers to come off as unassuming on most days. But don't let his, "I'm a harmless sleepy boy" shtick fool you. He will cut a bitch if he's so motivated...

Thankfully for the world, he's generally not motivated. But that can be changed under the right circumstances...

Belphie and the MC were on yet another date to the botanical gardens. It's a peaceful place, though the MC can never go alone because of the frankly concerning amount of flesh-eating plants… Pretty, but also deadly, you know?

The two of them were walking to another rest spot when Belphie heard whispering from a demon behind them, seemingly on his phone…

Lesser Demon: “Yeah, I can see them right now…”

Lesser Demon: “I know right? It's so lame that these guys are in charge of us… They can't even say no to a dumb human!”

Lesser Demon: “What do you mean keep my voice down? Dude, it's fine! This is Belphegor we're talking about, the hell is he going to do if he hears me?”

… Huh.

The answer to the man's question was a simple one. Flash into his demon form for just a moment and whip out his tail... It only took a quick swipe to make him trip and fall right into the foliage. The man-eating… carnivorous… hungry… foliage….

Belphie was back to normal by the time the jerk let out his first scream and the MC almost stopped to see what had happened.

MC: "What the-oh my God!! Should we help-??”

Belphie: *puts his hands on their shoulders to keep them moving, not even glancing back* “Someone else will take care of it. Let's see the roses.”

Even when the desperate cries for help became distant, it took all Belphie had to stifle a smile…

Sometimes, you've got to love irony. 🤷‍♀️😏

[sweethischier]

only when you're high - rafe cameron

word count: 4.3k

summary: Rafe only ever talks to you when he's high, and you've eventually had enough.

warnings: angst i guess, language, mentions of drugs and alcohol, lil makeout sesh at the end

note: ik this isn't the request but i've been working on this for a while so here ya go <3 this is def not my best writing so dont judge it too harshly

3:53 a.m.

You had been dreaming about your cat taking over a world full of people with fish heads when the incessant ringing from your phone jolted you awake. You blindly flung your hand onto the nightstand, knocking over a half empty water bottle and a bottle of ibuprofen before your fingers grazed the cool screen. You picked up the device, nearly blinding yourself when you opened your eyes to see who was calling you at such an ungodly hour. Once your eyes adjusted to the screen’s brightness, the name ‘Stupid Kook’ was displayed across the top. You hesitantly swiped to answer.

“What in the flying fuck do you want,” You whisper yelled, propping your half-conscious body up with your elbow.

“Hey, baby,” He greeted, his voice dragging as if he was thinking too hard about his words. “Just wanted to hear your voice.”

You stopped breathing for a moment, not sure what you were supposed to say to his weird revelation. You had been having a weird thing with Rafe for a few months now. After many drinks, you would often finding yourself making out with him in a secluded area. Despite your random make out sessions, he had never once called you to simply hear your voice. In fact, he hadn’t even called you before. It was usually always a quick ‘wyd’ text at midnight and nothing more.

“That’s weird, you’ve never called me before,” You pointed out, “You’ve also never called me baby before, so what’s that about?”

“Mm, I don’t know. Always wanted to call you that before so why not? What are you up to, baby,” He asked, his words slurring together in a way that could only happen while under the influence.

“You’re high aren’t you,” You sighed. Of course, he was high. You should have known that from the get-go. Rafe Cameron wouldn’t have called you sober; he never even looked at you sober.

A brief silence hung over the line, Rafe’s heavy breathing being the only thing coming through the receiver. “Maybe a little. Had a rough day, so I went to see Barry and now I’m at Topper’s. Talking to you.”

You couldn’t help but let a small smile grace your features; a smile that was gone almost as soon as it came. You let your elbow fall from its position, your head falling back onto the pillow that was still warm from when you were asleep. “How sweet of you. What are you doing, anyways? Shouldn’t you be getting shitfaced and taking some innocent girl to bed?”

He let out an airy laugh before speaking. “The only one I’d like to take to bed is you, and we somehow always stop before it gets to that point. Anyways, it’s just me, Topper, and Kelce, and I started thinking about us in the back of my truck when we were outside. Before I knew what I was doing, you answered the phone.”

Your cheeks flared red as images of Rafe’s hands exploring your body flashed through your mind, the feeling of his ring on your skin igniting something inside of you. His mouth latching onto the sensitive spots of your neck as your moans filled his truck. You let your fingers ghost over your lips as if you could still feel his own on yours. More memories of him exploring your body in every way but the way you wanted him most were running through your mind. Every time you wanted to give in to him, give in to your urges, but you couldn’t.

“You know, I’ve never wanted someone as much as I want you and I hate it,” He started, his words still slow, “I hate it because you’ll never let me have you.”

“Rafe,” You groaned, running a hand over your tired face, “I don’t really feel like giving myself to someone who only talks to me when they’re drunk or high. Someone who would rather be caught dead than with a pouge.”

“You know it’s not like that, baby. It’s complicated,” He tried, and you could tell there was a hint of unfamiliar panic in his voice.

“It always is. Guess I’ll see or talk to you next time you get fucked up. Goodnight Rafe,” You whispered before hanging up on the boy, ignoring his desperate protests.

1:38 a.m.

You turned the shower water off before stepping out onto the cool tiled floor, water dripping from every part of your body. You chose to ignore the buzzing coming from your phone, moving to grab the towel hung on the back of your bathroom door. However, the buzzing started again as you were drying off your legs.

“Who the fuck,” You groaned as you wrapped the towel around your still wet body. ‘Stupid Kook’ was making a second appearance, much to your surprise. “Yes, Rafe?”

“What’s up your ass,” He laughed his infectious laugh. You could picture him throwing his head back and his glazed over eyes twinkling with amusement, something you had only seen when you found yourself admiring him from afar.

“Nothings up my ass. Just don’t know what your high ass wants this time.” You gripped your phone in your hand and started to walk back towards your room. Your parents had fallen asleep hours ago, so you had to make sure you were quiet. However, that deemed difficult in the darkest hours of the night in your already poorly lit house. You bumped your hip and stubbed your toe on just about anything that was out in the open. Once you were in your room, you hastily shut the door and flipped the light switch on.

“Hello! Hello! Hello! Where are you,” Rafe yelled, making you wince and pull the phone away from your ear.

“Jesus, dude. Calm down, I was walking back to my room,” You chastised, doing your best to hold your phone in between your ear and shoulder.

“What were you doing? I missed you,” He pouted.

You ignored the swelling you got in your heart and said, “I was leaving the bathroom. I just finished showering. What are you doing?”

You grabbed a clean pair of underwear and a shirt you had taken from JJ after you had thrown up over whatever you were wearing that night. Rafe began telling you what he was doing, which was quite literally nothing. However, he quickly dove into a spout of how you were naked and wet and how badly he wanted to see you without any clothes on. Your cheeks were burning as he went on and on about all of the sinful things he wanted to do to you. You let him ramble on a bit more as you turned the light off once you were clothed and ready for bed.

“Okay, that’s enough, Rafe,” You stopped him, pulling your blanket back so you could crawl in bed. “So, calling me two times within a week? You falling in love with me?”

It was so painfully obvious that it was a joke, but you could practically feel the tension radiating through your phone from Rafe’s end. His abrupt silence concerned you because this boy was far from silent when he was doped out.

“Maybe I am,” He finally got out, and you couldn’t detect any sarcasm in it.

“Sure you are,” You rolled your eyes, blaming exhaustion for briefly clouding your judgment, “If you were in love with me, you’d actually talk to me when you aren’t too fucked to remember your own name.”

You started picking at a loose thread on your blanket as you let your mind wander to what life would be life if you had an actual relationship with Rafe. Going to parties with him. Hanging around the Island Club with him and his friends. Him doing lines off your body before having his way with you.

“I will talk to you when I’m not high,” His voice broke you from your thoughts, “If that’s what you really want.”

“I do,” You said way too quickly, “I mean, yeah sure. That would be nice, I guess.”

“Just text me and I’ll answer.” You couldn’t stifle the yawn that escaped your lips, but you did try and hide it from Rafe. Your attempt was no good, though. “You’re tired, go to bed.”

“No, I’m fi-.”

“Goodnight, Y/N,” Rafe shouted over you, “Talk to you soon, baby.”

Rafe’s name popped up on your phone screen every few days after he had gotten drunk out of his mind or too high to do anything other than find your contact. You didn’t mind it at first, but after you had texted him during the day and those messages went unanswered, you grew hurt and annoyed. You had tried asking him why he wouldn’t respond, but he always found a way to change the subject. You wanted to ask him about it in person, but you hadn’t seen him in almost a month. You wanted to ask him why he couldn’t bother to pick up the phone when he was sober, but wasted no time in calling you as soon as he got his bump in.

One of the nights he called, you offered to have him come over because your parents were gone, but he said no. Made up some excuse about how he was staying with Topper for a while since Sarah cheated on him and he wanted to be there for his friend. You understood that, so you didn’t push him after that. Then, the next time you told him about a party everyone was going to and how you wanted to see him there. You even told him to bring the other two. That time he told you he was staying away from parties for a while, wanting to stay to himself for the most part due to the constant stress from his dad. You knew how Ward could be sometimes, so it wasn’t hard to believe him and move on from there.

You wanted to be mad to him for only acknowledging you when he was high, but you couldn’t be. You’ve always wanted to feel wanted by somebody, and he made you feel like that albeit only when he was far gone from reality. You could deal with it as long as you got to talk to him, no matter how insecure it made you. Well, you thought you could.

2:25

Your parents were gone for the night, so you opted to watch Marvel movies in the living room. You were so invested in watching Iron Man and shoving popcorn in your mouth that you didn’t feel your phone go off the first six times. Or the fifteen times after that. Not that you would have cared either way. You knew the only person it could be was the boy who never wanted you sober. The credits began rolling across the TV, so you finally decided to pick up your discarded phone. You were shocked to see Rafe had called you eight times and texted you thirteen. Overall, his texts said the same thing.

Why aren’t u answering me :(

Call me pls

I wanna talk to you baby

It was if he knew you were finally looking at your phone because his contact popped up not ten seconds later. You rolled your eyes, but reluctantly answered.

“Y/N! Where have you been,” He whined into the receiver, “I’ve been trying to call you for like two hours.”

“Watching movies,” Your words were sharp and short, not particularly wanting to talk to him right now. You’ve nearly reached your breaking point with him.

Rafe could immediately tell something was off with you by the way you sounded. “What’s wrong, baby? Are you okay?”

You took a deep breath in, setting your bowl of popcorn on the coffee table after you paused the end credit scene. You leaned forwards and planted your elbow on your knee as you held your head in annoyance.

“I’m fine, Rafe. I’m just getting fed up with you only wanting to talk to me when you’re high or drunk,” You started, “I used to be fine with it because it once every couple of weeks, but now it’s almost every day and it’s annoying. You told me to text you when you’re sober, and I did, but you never responded. I try and offer to come over to you or have you come to me, but you always have an excuse. I know you want to be there for Topper and you don’t really want to be around anyone right now, but that doesn’t mean I have to put up with it.”

“Y/N, I know, and I’m sorry. It’s just-It’s complicated. Please understand that,” He was practically begging you to listen to him.

“Rafey, are you coming back to play beer pong with us,” A female voice suddenly cut through the sudden sound of music.

Your breathing stopped and your heart felt like it was being squeezed by Rafe’s own hand. A wave of heartbreak crashed over your entire body. “‘I just don’t want to be around anyone’ huh? Thought you were just spending time with Topper for a while? You know, if you didn’t want to see me, all you had to do was say so,” You whimpered, hurt now mixing with your anger and annoyance.

“No, wait,” He tried, yelling at whoever came in the room to get out, “Y/N, please. It isn’t lik-“

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence. It is like that, Rafe. It is exactly like that. You don’t want to see me, and that is fine. I get it. Why would you ever want to be seen with someone from the Cut? It doesn’t matter, though. Don’t call me anymore. You lied to me. That is not something that I can forgive,” Your tears were too strong to hold back now, “I don’t care for liars, Rafe Cameron, and you’re the biggest one of all.”

You quickly hung up and turned off your phone, throwing it towards the end of the couch so you weren’t tempted to grab it. You grabbed the large blanket from the back of the couch, picked another movie, and let your tears fall as it played in front of you.

“Honey,” Your moms gentle voice broke through, “You fell asleep on the couch.”

You slowly opened your eyes, letting them adjust to the bright light shining through the giant window. The headache hit you like a ton of brinks, causing you to squeeze your eyes shut in pain. Your mom was hovering over you, her hand on your shoulder and her soft eyes pretending to not notice how puffy your cheeks and red your eyes are.

“I guess so,” You mumbled, pushing yourself up into a sitting position, “I’ll go lay down in my room. I’m still tired.”

She gave you an understanding nod with a caring smile and helped you off the couch. Her hand lingered on your back as if she wanted to say something to you, but she decided to leave it alone for now. You would talk to her when you were ready, if you ever were. You gave her a thumbs up when she told you her and your father would be out again most of the day.

Your feet dragged as you stumbled back to your room, using the wall to keep you steady. You pushed the door open with your foot and gave your cat, who was laying on your bed as if she owned it, a stupid smile. You fell onto the bed and pulled her onto your chest as you turned your phone back on. You were scared to confront the actions from last night, but knowing Rafe, he probably wouldn’t have bothered to even send you a text about it. You were quickly proven wrong the moment your phone turned back on. The vibration from all of the texts, voicemails, and snapchats felt like it lasted for five straight minutes. Nearly all were from the boy you wanted nothing to do with. Although, you noticed a voicemail from Topper, who you forgot even had your number.

Um, hey its Topper. Look dude, I don’t know what happened, but Rafe is freaking out like a bitch right now. He keeps mumbling shit about how he fucked things up with, which I didn’t even know you two were a thing but whatever I don’t really care. He kicked everyone out of my house and has been calling and texting you for like thirty minutes straight now so please call him back, so he shuts the fuck up. If not for him, do it for my sanity before I kill him. Uh, yeah, thanks, bye.

You sighed deeply after the voicemail cut off, your heart rate increasing at the thought of Rafe being upset. If he was bad enough that Topper of all people called you, you knew it was bad. You wanted to not care because of how he made you feel, but you did. You’ve always cared about the blond boy more than you cared to admit. You finally decided to look at the messages he sent you.

Y/N pls call me back

I’m sorry its not what it looks like and I know that sounds stupid but its true

Pls talk to me. I need u to talk to me

I promise that I never wanted to hurt u ok???

I love you, Y/N. Please call me or I’m coming to your house tomorrow.

The world stopped spinning when you read the last message. You kept reading it over and over again as if you misread it the first time. Rafe had never been any kind of affectionate with you until he called you baby. Rafe Cameron was not someone known to get emotional, so you weren’t sure if you believed his words. He was a liar and would do anything to get what he wanted, so what was different now?

You heard a knock on the door followed by your moms muffled voice, but you were too focused on the situation in front of you to notice who it was. Your eyes were glued to the screen, staring at the three words you never thought anyone other than your family and friends would say to you. The world around you was fading away, your heart feeling as if it was going to beat out of your chest as tears slid down your still puffy cheeks. You weren’t going to let him do this to you. You weren’t going to let him toy with you anymore.

“Y/N,” A deep voice dragged you out of your subconscious.

Your eyes darted over to the door and saw the last person you wanted to see. Rafe was standing there, his eyes wide and blood shot and he looked like total shit. His hair was a wild mess, nothing like its usual tamed state. You met his gaze and you wished you hadn’t. One look from him and you were puddy in his hands. One look and every thought you had about never seeing him again flew out the window.

“Hey, can we talk,” He mumbled, his bright blue eyes looking everywhere but at you. “Please.”

Not trusting your words, you gave him a swift nod and gestured to the spot next to you on your bed. You leaned to the side and placed your cat on the ground, watching as she rubbed herself all over Rafe’s leg before scampering away. His walk to your bed was painfully slow, and you wanted to tell him to hurry up, but you knew that was unreasonable.

“What do you want, Rafe,” Your voice was harsh, trying to ignore the urge to reach out to him. “What do you want to talk about? How you only use me for your own pleasure? How you only ever even look at me when you’re drunk or high? How you lied to me? Wanna talk about that?”

Your anger surprised even yourself. One second you wanted to hold him in your arms and comfort him, but then the memory of how he treated you came back and flipped a switch in your brain. You don’t know how you feel and you hate it.

“I deserve every bit of your anger,” He breathed out, letting his hand fall dangerously close to your own, “But please let me explain everything to you, okay?”

“Fine,” You gave in, “Talk.”

“Yeah, thank you, okay. I really do want to talk to you when I’m not absolutely fucked, I do. I know that it doesn’t seem like that, but its true. I just, I can’t. Every time I look at you, think about you, I hear my dads voice screaming at me that I will never be good enough for anyone. I have this thought drilled into my head every day that no matter what I do, who I am, I am just never enough. To me, you’re no exception to that. In fact, you remind me even more. Wait no.”

Rafe rubbed both of his hands over his face and tugged at his hair, afraid that he’s already fucking this up. “Rafe,” You gently spoke up, turning to grab his hands from his face. “It’s fine. Keep going.”

His eyes met yours and you could see how strained he was. There were too many emotions swirling in his eyes for you to pinpoint exactly what he was feeling. “Okay, um, okay. To me, you are way too good for me, so the only time I feel comfortable talking to you is when I’m high. I’ve never had trouble talking to any girl before, but you’re more than that to me. You’re more than just some girl to me and it scares me, so I feel like I have to be, yanno, not me. When I talk to you. I want to be with you more than I have ever wanted to be with someone in my life”

Your hand was still holding his as you let his words sink in. Him revealing how his dad truly made him feel made your heart ache for him. It made you want to grab him by the face and tell him how he is more than good enough. You wanted to let him in, but you weren’t sure if you were ready for the risk that came along with it. You’re not sure if you want all the things that came with being with Rafe Cameron. He’s followed by hurt and lies, and you do feel guilty thinking that, but it’s been proven true countless times.

“Rafe, listen to me,” You began, moving so you were straddling him and holding his face in your hands. His hands immediately came to grip your hips, and you are well aware that this was a more than compromising situation. “I understand that your father is probably the worst person we both know, but that doesn’t excuse you lying to me. I don’t know if I can trust you, no matter how much I may want to.”

You watched as tears gather in his eyes, and he was doing his best to keep them at bay. He had never felt the way he feels about you before, and he’s more than aware that his reputation precedes him. He knows that he’s done nothing more than prove how untrusting he is to you, but he wouldn’t let that stop him from trying to prove to you that he means what he’s saying.

“I know that nothing I say will fix what I’ve already done. I know that, but I can show you just how much you mean to me, if you’ll let me. We can go at your pace. Do things your way. Just, please, give me another chance to prove myself to you.”

You’re searching for any detection of a lie in his eyes, in his voice, but you come up empty. You wipe away the stray tears that broke through his wall of protection. You hesitantly placed your forehead on his, and you could hear him take in a sharp breath at the connection. Your eyes fluttered closed, your nose brushing against his as you weighed all of your options.

“Did you mean what you to me? In your last text,” You whispered, too scared to open your eyes and look at him. “Do you actually love me?”

“More than you know,” His breath was hot against your chin, and he pulled you closer into him.

You decided to take a leap, dive into something that scared you more than anything. Your lips finally met his, and Rafe wasted no time in returning the feeling. Your hands fell from his cheeks and clasped each other behind his neck, while his hands stayed placed on your hips, too scared to push you too far. You deepened the passion filled kiss by pulling him closer to you and running your tongue across his bottom lip. Rafe’s lips moved in such a sensual way that you almost didn’t know how to react. It was much different from the lust filled kisses you’ve shared in the past. You started moving your hips on top of him, an action that had him gripping your hips tighter than before.

Y/N,” Rafe breathed out after he broke away from you, “If you don’t stop, I don’t know if I can control myself.”

“Then don’t.”

i have not edited this so if you see a mistake lmk. love u

[camsthisky]

"you’re not alone . you’re stuck with me forever . sorry . ” + Jason and Dick (and anyone other family member)?

“Everyone okay?” Dick croaks as the dust and rubble settles around them. He’s lying on his back, kept still by something pinning his legs down. He doesn’t dare assess himself quite yet. “Hood? Batgirl?”

“Okay,” Cass says, and Dick watches as she stumbles over to him, looking dusty, but relatively alright. She kneels next to him with a frown. She meets his eyes—well, relatively since they’re both wearing masks—and asks, “Okay?”

Dick grimaces. “Not really.” Louder, he calls, “Red Hood?!”

“Here, here,” Jason says, coughing into his fist. He’s missing his helmet and there’s a gash sluggishly bleeding from his right cheek, smearing a trail of blood down his face. He’s also limping, but only slightly.

“Can you move?” Cass asks Dick as Jason pulls out his flashlight.

Dick winces at the sudden light, his mask having already automatically switched to night vision. He huffs. “Jay. Off.”

“Names.”

Dick scowls. “The light.”

“Deal with it,” Jason snaps. “My night vision isn’t working.”

Dick turns off his own night vision feature, if only to not be blinded by the damn flashlight if it passes over his eyes again.

That’s when Jason’s flashlight lands on where Dick is pinned.

“Crap,” Jason breathes.

“Can you move them?” Cass asks, sounding a touch more impatient, and Dick realizes that Cass has already asked once. “Your legs.”

“No,” says Dick, just barely trying. He’s tired, but he knows that time is up. He can’t get away with ignoring his own situation any longer. Probably shouldn’t have even waited this long. His legs are tingling from lack of blood flow, mixing with a sharp pain shooting through them both. Still he’s lucky, because—“I can still feel them, though.”

“We’ll lift,” Jason says to Cass, who nods. Dick closes his eyes and braces himself for the inevitable pain of rubble being lifted off his crushed legs.

“Hhh.”

The sounds he makes is nothing more than an agonized hissed through his teeth, and Dick can’t help the cold sweat that sweeps across his body in a slow wave as his siblings manage to move the slab of—wall, maybe? who knows, really—from where it’s crushing his poor legs.

Something taps against his shinbone and then his kneecap.

“Stop, stop, I feel it,” Dick gasps, bringing his legs up in a protective curl as pain throbs through most of his lower body. His left hip hurts like hell, and his every muscle, bone, and tendon feels like they’ve been squeezed and then flattened like a pancake. He rolls over onto his side so he can bring his knees up to his chest, to wait out the lingering intensity of the pain.

“Breathe,” Cass says.

Dick breathes.

He closes his eyes and blocks out everything and, again, just breathes. His siblings let him.

When he has a better grasp on his agony, Dick finally relaxes. The world filters back in. Cass is running fingers through Dick’s dusty hair (something she one hundred percent learned from Bruce, because only a select few know how much the motion tends to calm him down).

On the other hand, Dick blinks his eyes open to find Jason agitatedly pacing.

“The hell?” Jason murmurs, his flashlight whipping back and forth with his movements as he surveys their surroundings. “Did we get completely sealed in?”

Dick wishes desperately he would stop. Even without night vision, Jason’s impromptu strobe light effect is causing Dick’s head to ache. Instead of saying this, he hums contemplatively. “Wonder if there’s a signal this far down.”

Jason huffs, not slowing in the least. He’s searching for something, and dear god does Dick want him to find it already. “You’re the one with the comms in your ear. You try it.”

They’re in the sewers, is the thing. And while Bruce and Babs have designed the comms system to work incredibly well, even in the sewers, the signal still needs to be able to make it to the system in order to be functional.

With the three of them sealed in this place, seemingly with no way out, pretty deep in the sewer system where they had been disabling bombs throughout the city, Dick isn’t optimistic about their chances of getting a signal.

(They’d just been a few seconds too late for that last bomb, which unfortunately led them to their current circumstances.)

While Jason grumbles, Cass activates her emergency signal and the comms. She calls out, “Batman? Oracle?”

Jason shuts up for the five seconds before Cass looks between both Dick and Jason and shakes her head.

Dick lets out a slow exhale through his nose. He hadn’t really held out much hope for that anyways.

Jason groans. “Holy batcannoli, I can’t believe we’re stuck down here. And where’s my hecking helmet?!”

Cass helpfully points to the rubble sealing them in. Jason kicks a rock with a yell. Dick sighs.

“Well, at least you’re not alone down here,” Dick says as optimistically as he can—although, given the circumstances, it does fall a little flat.

Jason snorts. “Right. Sure, Batgirl is an asset, but you’re a sack of bruised bones right now. That’s not helpful in the slightest, Dickface.”

Dick’s eyelashes flutter of their own accord. He hums. “Too bad. Looks like you’re stuck with me. Sorry.”

“Dick,” Cass says, her fingers tracing lightly over his face. “Stay awake.”

“I am awake.”

“You’re starting to—” Cass pauses. Dick can’t see the look on her face, because somehow, his eyes have fully closed without his permission, and he can’t seem to find the strength to open them again. “—to slur.”

The sounds of Jason’s pacing stop. Silence rings loud in their sealed section of the sewers. Then, “Did he hit his head?”

“Not sure,” Cass answers.

“Dick,” Jason says, sounding quite a bit closer, like he’s maybe crouching down next to Cass or something—but Dick hadn’t heard him move, and Jason’s boots are too clunky to not make sound against the concrete. “Dick, did you hit your head?”

Dick’s eyebrows furrow, but he doesn’t open his eyes. He doesn’t remember hitting his head. The only thing he clearly remembers about the blast is heavy pieces of rubble crushing his legs. “Maybe?”

“Great,” Jason says. He’s pulling out his I’m-rolling-my-eyes-at-your-ridiculous-incompetency voice. “So my bruised bones of a big brother probably also has a concussion. Just great.”

“It’s not his fault he’s injured,” Cass tells Jason. “He was disarming the bomb.”

Which means Dick took the brunt of the blast when it was remotely activated.

Dick really means to tack onto Cass’s statement, maybe tease Jason a little and try to reassure both his younger siblings that not everything is hopeless, because he’s the best big brother ever, of course.

Only, he can’t find the strength to open his mouth and talk. Instead, the voices around him become watery, distorted, and Dick’s head flares in pain.

When unconsciousness comes to take him, he doesn’t resist.

—

“—manage to even find us in the first place?” is the first thing Dick hears as he swims back to consciousness. Jason almost sounds relieved.

“The seismic device didn’t just affect the sewers,” someone replies. It takes a lot of effort for Dick to recognize it as Tim. “A couple buildings partially collapsed, and since we knew the three of you were down here, it was a good starting point to look when none of you would answer the comms.”

“Huh,” is all Jason says.

“Nightwing,” Bruce says, startling Dick from the dazed lull he’d been in as he listened to his brothers talking. He opens his eyes, blinking up bewilderingly at what he can see of Bruce’s face behind the cowl.

“B?” Dick murmurs. He doesn’t move, yet, from where’s curled on his side, but he feels an abortive twitch of his fingers at the reassuring sight of Batman. “‘S goin’ on?”

“What do you remember?”

Right. Bruce did not give easy answers. Life is a series of puzzles, Dick Grayson, fueled by none other than Bruce Wayne himself.

Dick frowns and casts his mind back. “The wall blew up,” he decides. “I got hurt?”

He’s only half sure about that last one, but considering his position on the ground, the throbbing in his head and hip, and Bruce’s concerned dad frown that’s taking over his Batman grimace, Dick thinks that he’s probably on the right track.

“Concussion,” Cass says, startling Dick when she pops her head over Bruce’s shoulder. “Also, ‘a sack of bruised bones.’”

That—sounds familiar. He thinks he remembers Jason saying something like that.

Bruce’s frown gets deeper. “Straighten your legs.”

“Please,” Dick tacks on for Bruce when he lacks the manners to be nice, basically on instinct at this point, even as he—slowly, and with a great deal of agony—does what Bruce tells him to do.

They go through a couple more tests, until finally Bruce, unhappy, deems, “We need to move you.”

Dick blinks when Bruce turns away to murmur something to one of the others. A conversation washes over him, and Dick can’t help but let himself tune it out. The noise settles as vague humming—indistinct and comforting.

“—two, three,” Bruce says as Dick’s entire vision goes white.

He only manages to come back to himself in increments.

There are arms holding him tight. Familiar murmurs in his ear. The comforting sound of Batman’s heavy cape brushing against concrete.

“—there, Chum,” Bruce is saying, and if Dick had the capability, he would have teased Bruce for pulling out both the concerned dad frown and the concerned dad voice in one night.

As it is, the only thing that comes out of his mouth when he opens it are harsh pants for air. Every step jostles him, and agony is his constant companion throughout the entire journey to the surface.

Somehow, Dick is still conscious when he’s laid down in the backseat of the batmobile. He’s grateful he’s not moving anymore, and carefully doesn’t think of the upcoming ride back to the Cave.

He only really starts to relax when Bruce settles the cape over him. Wrapped up inside it, Dick almost feels like he’s ten years old again. Batman’s has always felt like warmth and protection and home. This time is no different.

“Batgirl and Robin, keep Nightwing as still as possible. Red Hood, in the front. Start updating Oracle.”

“Why do they—”

“You’re too bulky, Hood. Me and Batgirl are smaller than you. It’s still going to be a tight fit, but it’s the most comfortable for everyone this way.”

“Whatever.”

“Enough. Car. Now.”

There’s lots of careful but hurried scrambling. Dick thinks he passes out a few times on the way back. He doesn’t remember much, either. Just bits and snatches here and there—His siblings talking to him, Bruce giving orders, Jason being snappy and unwittingly dragging Tim into an argument.

And then—he wakes up. A lot more clear-headed than he’d felt the last time he’d been conscious (though, that wasn’t saying much).

To Dick’s surprise, he’s on his side again, dressed in sweats with a pillow between his legs. He opens his eyes to the Wayne Manor living room, and—yes, he’s on the couch. The curtains are drawn, but it’s clearly sometime past sunrise.

Bruce is sitting cross-legged in front of him, reading a book.

“Bruce?” Dick calls, his voice still somewhat slurred. “Why’m I on the couch?”

“You started crying when I said you had to stay in the infirmary,” Bruce tells him, grabbing a bookmark and setting his book off to the side.

Dick frowns. He doesn’t remember that. Still, he manages to say, “You’re such a pushover.”

“How do you feel?”

Dick blinks a dozen times in a row, trying to assess his body and keep up with the change in subject. “Kinda woozy. My hip hurts a lot.”

“Hn.”

“Think I need to brush up on my Bat speak,” Dick murmurs. “Dunno what that one meant.”

Bruce hums again. “You’re incredibly lucky. We’ll need to be careful for the next few weeks.”

“What’s the diagnosis, doc?”

“Crush injuries to your legs and left hip. Not overly severe, and we managed to stabilize you once we realized you were in shock.”

Dick thinks about that for a second. “Concussion? I’m pretty sure I remember something about a concussion.”

“It’s mild,” Bruce tells him. “It was the shock that was the real problem.”

“Oh.” Dick sighs into the pillow under his head. “I’m tired.”

Bruce gives him a soft smile, just slight enough that if Dick hadn’t been so familiar with Bruce’s microexpressions, he would have thought he’d been mistaken. Fingers lightly card through his hair, and Dick’s eyes start closing of their own accord.

“Then sleep,” Bruce says.

Dick sleeps.

[i-spaced-sorry]

First Date

Jay Halstead x Asexual ! Reader

Imagine you’re on your first date with Jay and he knows your asexual but doesn’t know how to carry on with the date.

A/N: I wrote this from my experience as being an Asexual in the dating world, but every persons experience is different! This is just how I’d imagine Jay would handle things.

Dating as an asexual had never been easy. All guys seemed to want was sex and they were willing to do whatever and say whatever they had to, to try and make you comfortable around the idea. But when you didn’t budge, they cussed you out and left in a very dramatic guilt tripping manner, hoping you’d change your mind. That was why when Jay Halstead said he was completely and utterly okay with you being asexual, you didn’t believe him for a minute. 

“Y/N, I know we said all we were going to do was cuddle, but I’m not sure what else you want from me,” Jay stated, while pushing himself up against the headboard. 

I cocked my head sideways and asked, “what do you mean?” Was he going to turn on me like the other guys? I knew he was too good to be true. 

“Some girls want sex, some girls want to make out, but with you, I can’t read what you want” was all he said back. 

Thinking about what he was saying, I realized that he had just spent the last 4 hrs laying in bed cuddling with me and I really should indulge him with something he wanted. 

“I don’t know honestly”

Smiling, Jay asked, “Y/N, is it okay if I kiss you? I don’t really know how asexuality works and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I really like you.”

Feeling my cheeks turn red, I smiled.I really liked this guy and I was so happy to see that he was treading lightly around the topic of my sexuality. But I had never kissed anyone properly before and was scared he would laugh in my face. 

“I’d like that,” I heard my voice say in response. 

Jay closed his eyes and started to lean in. 

Staring his lips down as they got closer I could feel my heart start to beat faster, before I knew what I was doing, I put my hand on his chest and pushed him back yelping, “Wait!”

“What? What’s wrong?” asked Jay, as he stared back at me with a confused look on his face.

Realizing I had to come clean and explain myself, I mumbled, “it’s just I’ve never kissed anyone before”

I watched as the wheels turned in Jay’s head and I knew I had to keep talking before he decided to storm out like all the other guys I’ve tried dating, 

“I must admit, I didn’t even know cuddling could be so intimate. But I watched a bunch of youtube videos showing how it was and I was scared to do that too, but you made it so much better than I thought it would be” I word vomited. 

Jay still sat there a taken back from my admission, so I continued, 

“God, I must sound like such a virgin. Which is funny since I am one. But God, I really like you. I want to kiss you so badly, but I’m scared it won’t be good enough for you.” you continued to blabber on.

“Hey!” began Jay, cutting me off. “You being you, is plenty enough for me. If I made you uncomfortable, then we can always just continue to cuddle. I just like being around you. Your vulnerability and honesty is something I don’t see with many people I date and it’s honestly refreshing.”

Sighing, you knew the easy thing to do would be to just give up the whole kissing thing and go back to cuddling. But in your heart, you knew you should give it a try, so before you could overthink it, you heard your voice state firmly, “No! I want to kiss you!”

Smiling, Jay asked tentatively, “I want to make sure you're making a conscious decision and not just saying it because you know I want it. Are you sure you want to kiss?”

Just knowing he was taking things this slow was enough to make your heart beat so fast it felt like it would rip out of your chest. 

“Jay Halstead, I’m sure I want to kiss you!”

That must have been confirmation enough for Jay cause I watched as he shut his eyes and leaned close to my mouth, I realized maybe I should shut mine too. Not too long after that I felt his chapped lips against my own. 

Then in one swift motion I felt his tongue appear in my mouth, begging to fall down my throat. 

A few minutes had passed and Jay was still passionately attacking the back of my throat with his tongue. I opened my eyes to see his brown hair in my peripheral vision. I sorta wanted the kissing to end but didn’t know how to pull away. 

Soon enough, Jay pulled away, probably reading my mind. We looked at each other and smiled.

“How was that?” asked Jay softly.

“Good. real good, I hope I wasn’t too bad” I rushed out.

“You were perfect!” was all Jay responded with.

After that, we cuddled more until he got a call saying he was needed back at the precinct.

Thanks for reading and feel free to like/reblog and give me feedback!

[introvert--weeb]

Can I ask for a request for draken who has a crush on fem reader who’s the half baby sister of hakkai and yuzuha and she’s practically the princess of toman and no matter how many times he tries to approach her she’s always nervous (kinda like her brother) of being around him b/c she has a huge crush on him and she plans on confessing to him but she sees someone else confessing to him and she gets pretty sad and after that a rival gang notices she’s the princess of toman and decide to harass/hurt her and she ends up in the hospital, draken finds out and is pissed b/c of what happened and he ends up finding the guys who hurt her and he and the others beat the crap out of them after that he ends up confessing to her at the hospital and it ends in fluffy fluff:3

Hi anon! Thank you for the request! I really hope you enjoy it!!

--

Draken X f!reader (angst to fluff)

TW: mentions of injury, hospitalisation, violence

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You could remember the moment you had fallen for the Vice President of Toman. Draken. He had instantly taken your heart and he was all you ever thought about these days.

Being the baby sister of Hakkai (although not fully), you were really close to the lanky male. In fact, you followed him like his much smaller shadow when he would attend Toman meetings. With how often you had turned up alongside the Second Division Vice Captain, you had been adopted as the Princess of Toman. Your cute looks and innocent persona had made everyone feel the need to keep you safe from harm.

Especially Draken. He would even kill a man if it meant you would be safe and happy. The poor boy had developed deep feelings for you, so deep that he would even claim it to be love. This had gone way past a simple infatuation.

To anyone with eyes, they could see how you both were obviously in love with the other but your interactions were awkward to say the least.

Just like your older brother, you had a hard time communicating with the opposite gender. Not so much with Mitsuya or Mikey but anyone else would be victim to your shyness. Stuttering and soft words were evident whenever someone had tried to talk to you apart from those you knew.

Over time, you had gotten better with your shyness with other members of Toman, becoming especially close to Angry (Souya) as you both seemed to be similar. The only person you couldn't talk a single syllable to was Draken.

Draken had tried multiple times to talk to you, to get to know you. But each attempt was met with failure. As soon as he would get close enough to start a conversation with you, you would become flustered. A deep blush took over your face and ears before you would run off to find Hakkai. Ken was confused as he had hardly gotten a simple 'hi' before you had disappeared.

You didn't mean to seem rude. You just felt like your heart would explode if you remained in his presence longer than a few seconds to a minute. He was just so cool and perfect that you had convinced yourself he was way out of your league. But maybe one day you would get the confidence to at least allow your feelings to be known to the tall blond.

That day had finally come. You had finally gathered enough confidence to confess your strong feelings for Ken Ryuguji. Yuzuha had helped you practice what you would say while she dolled you up. She had picked out a cute black skirt with a f/c shirt that went perfectly. Cute is what you thought when you had examined yourself in the body length mirror. Hopefully Draken would think so too.

After another run through with what you would say, Yuzuha handed you your small bag which contained your wallet and phone. You thanked her for all her help before heading to where you knew Draken and Mikey would be. After all, it was lunch time.

It didn't take you long to reach the café, your hands fiddling with the hem of your skirt as you approached nearer. This was it. You were finally going to tell him how you feel and you would find out if he felt the same. If he did, great...if he didn't, you would have to accept it.

Pushing the door open, you were frozen to the spot at the sight that greeted you. At the table where Draken and Mikey were sat, there was a girl who was talking to the vice president. Silently approaching closer, you had caught the words that tumbled out of her mouth.

"I really like you Ryuguji-kun! Please accept my confession!"

That's it. Your world crumbled around you. You were too late. Too naive to believe you were the only one who saw how amazing Draken was. And due to your shyness, you had missed out on telling him your feelings.

Your body had gone into auto pilot as you ran out of the café, tears falling rapidly down your cheeks. How could you be so stupid? Of course Draken wouldn't like someone as awkward as you! He needed someone who was strong and had enough confidence in themselves. Someone the complete opposite of you.

You had been wandering the streets aimlessly for an hour now. All your tears had been shed and you felt empty. You didn't want to head home yet. Not while you were still wallowing.

"Oh hey! It's Toman's princess!" A strange voice called out somewhere behind you. How did they know that nickname? Did everyone know you as this? That you would have to guess was the case as it wasn't long until you were surrounded by high school kids.

You didn't know what to do. You could try to fight but you only knew a little self defense. Thinking about it, you really should have asked Mitsuya or Mikey or even Hakkai to teach you how to fight.

Within moments, before you could truly react, the gang had descended upon you with kicks and punches, knocking the air from your lungs. You had tried to fight back, even succeeding in landing a punch or two on your opponents. However, it only angered them more and the beating intensified.

The gang had left you alone when you could barely stay awake. Your body lay battered on the concrete, bruises and broken bones making themselves known. Maybe it was your lack of energy or maybe it was the intensity of the pain, but your mind had shut itself down causing you to pass out.

The next Toman meeting was that night. Everyone had gathered together at the usual shrine, parking their bikes and engaging in conversations until Mikey would begin his announcements.

Draken was in a pretty foul mood that night. Having received that confession from that girl had really put him on edge. Of course he had rejected her feelings, knowing his heart belonged to Toman's princess. Speaking of Y/N, where was she?

Hakkai had pulled up at the shrine, his face showing just how devastated he felt. Always one to wear his heart on his sleeve after all. He was blaming himself for not being able to protect his baby sister from the fate she had encountered.

Noticing that the lanky boy was on his own, Draken went over to ask about where you were as you never missed a meeting. Hakkai just shook his head, mumbling that he had explained the situation to Taka-chan and Mikey already so he should ask them if he wanted to find out. It wasn't that Hakkai was being rude, he was just emotionally exhausted from having to explain it twice already.

Panic set in Ken's gut but he had no reason why. You were surely safe, right? After all, you would follow Hakkai everywhere and he would protect you with his last breath if needed.

It was during Mikey's announcements that Draken had found out about you being in hospital, placed under a medical coma to help your recovery. No-one knew when and if you would wake up. This news caused Ken's heart to drop to his stomach but also for immense rage to ignite in his chest. He would find the gang that had hurt his princess and make them pay.

Draken along with the rest of Toman had found the gang responsible for your condition within days of your hospitalisation. A huge brawl had occurred which lasted maybe 5 minutes at most. Draken had left no-one conscious, taking his anger out on the scum that dared harm what was his.

Everyone in Toman had decided to visit you once the brawl was over and you were properly avenged. Everyone simply watched as your chest rose and fell with each breath, the only indication you hadn't passed on yet. Draken felt his throat get clogged by the tears and sobs he was holding back. He was the tough vice president after all. He couldn't afford to look weak.

Weeks passed by with Ken spending his time at your bedside, waiting for any sign that you would wake up. He missed seeing your e/c eyes that he could stare into forever. He missed your cute giggles he would hear when you joked around with Angry. He missed you.

Unable to help himself, Draken allowed a few tears to escape past his eyes and roll down his cheek. "Please wake up Y/N. I love you, and I will tell you that everyday when you are back," and with those words, Ken leaned forward to gently brush his lips against yours.

Just like how it happened in fairy tales, your eye lids began to flutter open as Draken pulled back. The poor boy didn't notice you were awake until your hand (which he clutched tightly in his own) began to move slightly. In disbelief, Draken moved his teary gaze to your face where you were smiling back at him. Your cheeks had begun to heat up once you realised that your crush was holding your hand.

"YOU'RE AWAKE!" Ken was so loud that you had to shush him, your voice laced with giggles. Draken was just so happy that you were awake and looking OK that he pulled your face closer to his. Before you knew it, your lips were covered by another pair in a harsh but love filled kiss.

You must have died and gone to heaven, you convinced yourself. Due to that thought, you had the confidence to kiss back, even lifting your hand on his bicep. It was the best feeling you could ever hope to know. Heaven was surely amazing.

"I love you... I love you... I love you..." Draken muttered against your lips in between the soft pecks he was now leaving on you. He was so happy that you had kissed back, almost confirming you felt the same for the blond.

"I love you too..." Your breath came out as a long sigh, your voice dreamy and filled with all your feelings. Ken moved away from your face and relaxed back in the chair he occupied, a grin plastered on his face.

You were finally beginning to focus on where you were. Beeping machines, wires connected to your arm, the distinctive smell of disinfectants. You weren't in heaven after all. You were alive and in the hospital. It was only then that you had realised you had kissed your crush and told him you loved him too.

All the confidence you seemed to have evaporated in an instant. You were left a tomato red and stuttering so much that no words could come up. You had actually confessed and kissed Ken Ryuguji...

It was 2 weeks later when you were discharged from the hospital, accompanied by bandages around your ribs and your new boyfriend. "Make sure you're ready for our date tomorrow babe," Draken whispered in your ear, causing shivers to travel down your spine.

This boy was going to be the death of you.