#although these have been very cathartic to write I will say

[phoenixtakaramono]

K, U, D with butchlander pls! loveee your writing

(This Ask is regarding this.) Thank you very much! Writing these lil HCs are very cathartic (lowkey, some of my HCs are actually things I’d legit write in a threadfic or an AO3 fic.)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I’d discussed, in a previous Ask, Billy’s both of their creampie breeding kink here, as well as a brief cameo of Homelander’s milk lactation and oral fixation kinks. So I’ll offer another one:

Roleplaying.

With Homelander, it’s fairly obvious with any lover, he’d roleplay as the valiant hero saving the damsel/ citizen in distress. He’d very likely milk it for all it’s worth if he can pester Billy into playing the role of some hapless citizen of Manhattan getting mugged, whom Homelander swoops down from the skies and rescues from peril. Cheekily asks for a kiss when Billy, very dryly, recites by rote: “my hero, how can I ever repay you?” He’s subjected Billy to Marvel/ DCU VCU flicks, especially Homelander’s own filmography, for a reason—so Billy knows all the cringey love interest lines (imagine things Lois Lane or Mary Jane would say). If he’s been really good lately and Billy’s in an indulgent mood, he can probably wheedle Billy into roleplaying his PA (personal assistant)/ secretary or an investor or a sidekick or a grateful lovestruck fan.

If he’s feeling particularly frisky, he’d switch things up and expect Billy to play the role of a Supe terrorist, an evil British mastermind, a supervillain, what have you whom he, as The Homelander, has been “sent by Vought” to “put an end to.” Now, we open up new possibilities.

Now with both scenarios, I expect there is some hapless third party, whether it be an actual criminal or some sorry Supe whom Billy has had his eye on, who serves as the cannon fodder to the couple’s PDA. Remember the scene in S2 where Homelander crushes the skull of a crook whilst he makes out with Stormfront? Yeah, we’re talking about that level of unhinged PDA between himself and Billy. If it’s not behind closed doors, their roleplaying almost always involves some kinda casualty. They’re both psychopaths (although one is arguably more of a sociopath). Violence and adrenaline gets them hot and heavy; it gets their blood pumping, accelerates their heart rate. But with the first scenario, Billy’s more so acting as the indulgent lover catering to Homelander’s whims—however batshit insane or risky some of his fantasies can be (we’re talking a revenge quickie in a conference room fucking in the seat of whichever member of Vought’s board of directors has recently pissed Homelander off or Billy literally being dressed to the nines having to saunter into a Vought charity gala like some kinda sexy James Bond-esque honeytrap agent whose mission is to rizz Homelander up and “seduce the hero”). Billy’s often the backseat driver in those cases, and more often than not he has to be convinced. But with the second scenario, this presents Billy a challenge; he’s in his element. Now he’s an active participant, doing what he does best; screwing Homelander over comes automatically to him. He cannot get rid of this side to him, even after he’s entered a relationship with his former enemy. Also, William “Billy” Butcher is very hot and sexy as an evil villain—and him being “evil” is very much one of Homelander’s turn-ons. Because this lowkey also plays into his egotistical powertrip fantasy of being the one to save someone so undeniably evil/ who undeniably hates him and being the catalyst of “turning them good”. It’s every superhero’s white savior complex.

Have you seen Miike Snow’s Genghis Khan music video?

The supervillain/hero to domestic family love story is literally what gets Homelander hot and bothered, with him playing the role as the hero whom Billy, as the villain who’s obsessed with him, has knocked unconscious and has strapped down to a gurney with a death ray seconds from blasting him to smithereens. But the villain, after having long last overpowered his foe, is faced with the conundrum of pushing the KILL or RELEASE button—and in the end cannot bear with the thought of killing the other side of his same coin and lets him go. And, obviously, with Billy having chosen the correct moral decision, Homelander has to reward him. If either Homelander or Billy are feeling particularly kinky and Homelander’s given his consent (I think this freak in the sheets rarely says “no” to a romantic partner and he’s been so conditioned that he thinks he can tank anything—so Billy, as the more conscientious one between the two of them, would normally be looking for any subtle indicators of Homelander’s discomfort…unless Billy’s in a particularly foul mood and wants a little revenge this is a safe enough outlet for him to vent out his frustrations, such as blinding Homelander with a zinc-lined blindfold and tying his wrists and ankles down tightly, and ordering him to come with nothing but the electric stimulation to his nipples and his dick, and a fuck machine pumping into him for the next three hours while Billy watches him squirm, gyrate his hips like a wh0re, with Homelander near tears from his fifth consecutive orgasm shooting through him, and him moaning/snarling for Billy to “stop being such a fucking prick and touch me right now or, so help me God, I will rip out your fucking spleen!”—but Billy’s not having that bratty attitude because Homelander’s got five more hands-free orgasms to go since a certain someone had bragged he’s made someone come seven times on his lap and Billy’s feeling extra vicious tonight with his “surely ten is a walk in the park for you, hero?”) Homelander’s usually game to see what “evil dastardly plot” Billy wants to do to him this time. It’s usually very, very, very fun and exciting, new and interesting. Homelander can be a bit of a bossy, high maintenance, needy control freak but ceding Billy the reins spices up their bedroom activities because now we’re talking spanking, riding crops, sensory deprivation, mayhap a cage, some sadomasochistic BDSM play, some kinky humiliation/ verbal or physical degradation (to an extent; we’re talking something as tame as forced feminization, with Billy making Homelander wear lacy lingerie or training him with chastity cages—until the Supe’s able to use the smallest cage size, with Homelander red-faced and embarrassed as Billy deliberately insults his leaking cock despite it being big or a decent-size irl and calls it “a waste of a reproductive organ”/ “a clit” and his anus “a pussy”/ “warm hole” if Billy’s feeling extra nice, although they both know it’s biologically impossible, he’ll toy with his hole and croon he’ll “wife him up” and impregnate him until he’s “showing and round with their babies, just you wait” (don’t tell me Homelander’s dick wouldn’t jolt and start leaking precum crazily the moment he heard that; this is the kind of dirty talk that gay legends speak of)—to something on the more extreme end that Homelander’s willing to tolerate), erotic asphyxiation, overstimulation, hot wax, ice play, etcetera. When it comes to Homelander, Billy Butcher can be very, very creative.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Yes. Both of them do. They like to be a tease and sexually frustrate the other person as much as possible—even at the most inconvenient of times. Both men are the type of cheeky bastard who would deliberately get the other person hot and bothered, and then stop just before the partner achieves climax, bat their lashes, and sweetly tell them they’re tired so they can just finish themself off, sweetheart. It’s both hilarious and/or sexy to them, especially when the other partner attempts to grab them, breathing hard, but they slip away and has the nerve to tell them to take an ice bath or finish off themself by hand.

They both know what turns the other person on. Imagine Billy’s meeting with The Boys, and Billy suddenly gets a notification from one of those secret disguised apps with an encrypted text message for him to open the photo attachment or short video clip with a warning to put it on mute if he’s not by himself. You can pretty much be able to guess what Billy sees the moment he opens what Homelander sent him; it’s very spicy and not PG friendly. Likewise in a very important superhero function, whilst Homelander is probably talking to a senator or politician, Billy will deliberately lower his voice and whisper “Pet (or “love” or or whatever endearment Homelander seems very partial to), wouldn’t it blow that sod’s mind knowing how close I am to hiking those pretty legs of yours up and making you cum all over that champagne tower?” It’s something very inappropriate and explicit, but my god does it make Homelander choke on his tongue and make his face burn. Of course Homelander plays it off when the concerned party asks if everything’s alright. But Billy’s not done yet. The more Billy starts riling him up from afar, with Homelander being the only one able to hear him and him surrounded by old fossils whom neither of them could give a toss about, Homelander will inevitably start scheming on how to sneak a quick shag in without tipping anyone off.

Pretty much both men know how to lead the other person on—until they almost can’t stand it. And. They. Need. Them. Now. It leads to quite frequent, impatient but passionate sexy times.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

This is a very broad wild card question that is open to interpretation. A dirty secret of theirs, that I think could apply to them, is both men, however possessive or obsessive they are, have cheating inclinations (gee, thanks, S4 for making it show canon (sarcasm)). Now, yes, in an ideal world, they’re both obsessed with each other so much that they only have eyes for each other. But I’m writing this HC as a challenge. Now, okay, let’s go with the premise that they were once straight men and sometimes they can’t help missing the joy of a woman’s pussy when the whim hits. However, Billy would do it to hurt Homelander. Like, unless he’s intentionally trying to keep it a secret for whatever reason (whether it’s because he has some conscience or he’s on a honeytrap mission to collect important blackmail material), he’s not exactly subtle about it. Even in a happy relationship, this man has a very real problem of self-sabotage. But in this scenario he’s most likely 1) he’s fucking to get over the craving of missing the touch of a woman and 2) that person was probably pre-selected by him to serve as a means to an end. He wants Homelander to know. To hurt badly. This would obviously lead to Homelander finding out—and lashing out. Quite violently. That wo/man whom Billy had an affair with would meet a violent end. You can expect Homelander menacingly sitting in the dark, fuming, and when Billy enters through the door and flicks the lights on, he tosses their decapitated head at Billy’s feet—spinal cord and sinews still attached at the stump. And this is precisely what Billy had planned to happen. Because now he has killed two birds with one stone, and he has Homelander’s attention.

On the other end, I can see Homelander “cheating” more so accidentally. While I can also envision him going to find someone else if he’s engaged in a Cold War with Billy, with Billy freezing all bedroom activities—and Homelander feels wronged by it—and fucking the third party out of pent-up sexual frustration, I think Homelander would surprisingly be the one in the relationship trying to stay faithful and monogamous. His hand would have to be his companion during these trying times—until whatever fit Billy’s throwing finally passes. He just has to weather the storm in the interim. So when I mean accidentally, I mean wo/men deliberately approaching him to seduce America’s No.1 Hero or Vought telling him he has to enter a one year showmance contract with an up-and-coming heroine to boost sales or whatever publicity stunt. Now, obviously, when Billy finds out, especially if Homelander hides it from him or the Supe doesn’t yet realize the other party’s ulterior motive because he’s too blinded by the rose-tinted glasses of love he has for Billy, Billy’s the type of guy who tails the suspected adulterer or hussy suspected of trying to put the moves on his prey. And he would quietly make the person disappear. Funny enough, the next day, Homelander would be scratching his head and saying the person’s submitted their resignation, been sent “overseas on a top secret mission,” had their dirty laundry exposed, or whatever it is. After a pause, he’d glance at Billy with a knowing look and murmur, “You had something to do with it, didn’t you? …I don’t know what you did, but your heart cannot lie.” (Because he can hear Billy’s BPM, which serves as his lie-detector machine.) Very rarely would he openly and publicly confront Homelander if caught in the act but if so, it’d be deliberate with Billy timing it so that he catches Homelander balls deep inside another woman, and the adulterers noticing him in the background before Billy gives a scoundrel-like smirk and calmly utters “There you are…y’know, I’m quite angry with you” (or something equally terrifying) before detonating the office level with the C4 bombs he’d planted. (Of course both he and Homelander will be fine in the aftermath, but the same cannot be said about the third party. Homelander’s not exactly altruistic.)

At the end of the day, it serves as a test. It’s a gaslighting, manipulative power struggle. Because even if the other person cheated, they themself cannot let go of that toxic partner; at the end of the day, they are unwilling to let the other person go. They’re trapped in an ouroboros cycle of love and hate and obsession.

[cerise-on-top]

Can you write sum poly Alejandro and Rudy hcs? If you do not write poly, please ignore :(

thank you!! Love your work!!

Posting these two requests as one because they're essentially the same! Also, anon, I never would have written this request if the two lads weren't in love with each other as well! I'm just a lil guy, a sucker for poly relationships! Thank you for requesting this, I was so looking forward to writing this!

Being in a Poly Relationship with Alejandro and Rodolfo

You’ve likely known each other for a while and it was established very early on that Alejandro and Rodolfo were a couple. You got close to them regardless. As a friend, naturally. Spending time with each other was fun, you were there for each other through thick and thin, no matter what. There was never a sliver of doubt that the three of you cared a great deal about each other, but you always knew that between you and them, it would always stay platonic. You didn’t particularly mind that too much, they were great friends after all. Besides, teasing them about being too sweet in their relationship was also fun in and of itself. Years of you being with them would pass, years upon years of you supporting them, helping them move, helping them sort things out in their relationship from time to time. You were their closest confidant and the two of them knew they could always count on you, regardless of what it may have been. And at some point, Rodolfo would develop a little crush on you.

At first it would be small, something he could easily ignore. He had Alejandro, there was no need for someone else. Besides, was something like that even possible? Was it allowed? He didn’t know that. He didn’t know too much about poly relationships back then, but he vowed to not tell Alejandro about it either. What if he would destroy what they had? Not worth it. So he ignored his little crush that grew into a bigger problem as time went on. No matter how much he tried to hide it, it became obvious at some point. And then, when he elected to ignore you in hopes of it going away, you were the one to come up to him, understandably angry. Alejandro, too, would pitch in and ask what’s going on. Although it would take some more probing for Rodolfo to tell the truth, he would give in eventually and say what’s on his mind, ashamed beyond recognition. Alejandro would laugh a bit, claiming that he somehow had a feeling that that was the case. He doesn’t mind being in a relationship with you and Rodolfo as long as the latter would be happy. He has considered it from time to time as well, but he doesn’t harbor such strong feelings towards you, yet. However, those feelings would develop eventually.

As boyfriends, the two of them are absolutely lovely. Rodolfo is a very touch starved man, no amount of physical affection could ever satisfy him. However, he rarely does initiate physical touch. Alejandro is a very physically affectionate man, one of his hands always on either you or Rodolfo. His favorite position would be him lying against the back of the couch, with you and Rodolfo cuddling up into his side each. He absolutely melts whenever one of you falls asleep against him, making sure to tighten the grip he has on you just a bit more so you can sleep easy. While you and Rodolfo are cuddled up against him like that, one thing that Rodolfo loves more than anything is to place his hand on Alejandro’s chest, hoping you will do the same and hold his. He doesn’t have as much trouble sleeping, but just the reassurance that both of his loved ones are with him is a big reassurance. Although he rarely ever says it out loud with you in the beginning of your relationship, he does hint at wanting to be cuddled from time to time. He very much loves being held, so being with Alejandro, who loves to protect his loved ones by holding them, is very cathartic. While you can get him to hold you fairly easily, he’ll bite back a smile if you tell him that you’re going to cuddle him good.

Rodolfo is actually a pretty good dancer. He learned because of Alejandro, since he always wanted to learn. The latter may not be as good as Rodolfo, but that doesn’t stop him from pulling either of you on the dance floor and dancing with you. The more they get to touch you and each other, the better. Though, it likely won’t happen out in public, aside from some swaying when you’re out at a party, but if you’re home you’ll be spun around. Good luck trying to keep up, the two of them are pretty fast paced with each other. Sometimes they dance because they’re feeling romantic, other times it’s a competition on who can outlast the other. So far, they’ve been pretty even despite it all. Naturally, you’ll be danced with as well, it’s an important ritual for the both of them that they’ve grown fond of. If you’re a beginner then they’ll start with something slow, like slow waltzing. Neither of them particularly need to look at their feet to know the steps, so they either look at each other or you. In fact, the two of them casually converse with each other as well while they’re dancing while you’re dizzy and out of breath. But they don’t mind. If you’re especially clumsy then they’ll laugh a bit, but not out of malice. You’re just too cute, that’s all. If you’re an experienced dancer then they’ll go all out with you. You can tango with each other or dance the Viennese waltz, it’s entirely up to you. Again, the more they get to touch you, the more they get to be close to you, the better. If you’re further into the relationship they’ll even dip and kiss you. Just to show off how strong they are.

Alejandro and Rodolfo like to go hiking with each other. There likely isn’t a single place in and around Las Almas they haven’t seen yet. Naturally, they’ll have you tag along. There’s some very beautiful scenery there, if you look for it. Since being active is something that they’ve always loved, they will get you to join them, regardless of whether you love walking up mountains or if you’re a couch potato. It means a lot to them. Besides, Rodolfo can do some very convincing puppy eyes and Alejandro can be very convincing with his words. You can haggle with them on a reward you’ll get once you survive your little hike. They won’t go overboard if it’s your first time hiking with them, maybe you’ll simply walk around the city together, visit some place nearby and build up stamina like that. But even if you do agree to go hiking with them, there’s a good chance you’ll overstrain yourself if they go all out. Therefore you’ll start with something small, something reasonable. Once you’ve reached your destination you’ll likely have a small picnic there. What better way to reward yourself than with some good, homemade food? If you don’t have a lot of stamina then they’ll cheer you on and take breaks whenever it seems as though you need one. It doesn’t matter if they reach their destination in two hours or three, as long as you’re all doing well that’s all that matters.

Generally speaking, Alejandro and Rodolfo like to do a lot of things together. Rodolfo is rather introverted, so he prefers to stay at home and do things there. Alejandro is the opposite, he’s rather outgoing and always wants to go outside when he can. They don’t always see eye to eye with each other on what they should do if they have time, so having you around would make some things a bit easier. Both of them suggest something and you get to be the lucky one who chooses on what it will be you’ll be doing together. This ranges from going to a bar and drinking, to staying at home and cooking something big. Hell, if you really want, you can throw in a suggestion of your own, something neither of them thought of, and maybe you’ll do that. While the beginning stage of your polycule may be a bit awkward, you’re their equal from day one. If you wanna ride your bike around Las Almas, then you can. If you wanna go visit the United States, you can. If you wanna stay at home and watch anime all day with them, then you can. There are endless possibilities.

If you don’t know Spanish, or don’t know it that well, then they’ll be speaking to each other in Spanish while you’re around. Yes, they will mention you by name and make sure they have your attention. It might seem like they’re gossiping about you, but in reality they’re talking about where to take you next, how adorable you are and how glad they are to have you with them. Rodolfo would be a bit more reasonable and tell Alejandro to translate what he said, but it’s never anything harmful. Besides, you’ll be learning Spanish with both of them either way. Alejandro really wants you to know the language so he can speak it with you. Rodolfo doesn’t mind too much either way, but he sort of does look forward to playing teacher. You get a reward for doing well each time as well, so there’s that. However, if you’re not a native speaker, then the two of them will speed up how quickly they talk so they can be cringe and embarrassing and in love without you hearing it. If you’re a native Spanish speaker then they’ll be speaking Spanish with you anytime they can anyway, so no secrets there.

[saintobio]

Saint!!! omgomg

The latest SY sneak peak??? CHEF’S KISS ISTG.

I am so so sooo excited for whats to come. dhajsj. Toru calling mc “my wife” DKAKAKSK. Yn pussy so good boi forgot we divorced 😭😭

I wonder how everything will end tho (with momjo and gen and akemi still in the picture) my heart ached when you gave toji’s conclusion DJSJJAJA im sorry but im still team Satoru (love him too much, my pookiebear) my baby sachiii 🥲 I hope my baby is okay. I just hope mc would let him be a big brother bc i knew he would be very very protective of their younger like his dada. And pleasee, i need Gojo to redeem himself of being a father.

I feel like with SY ending, it’s like saying goodbye to your favorite friend who gave you comfort and everything that you needed in the moment. I enjoyed it so much and even reread it when you were on hiatus (and randomly thinking of possible endings). This was the very fic that gave me the gojo chokehold bc the plot? The dialogue? The characters? The world building? THEY WERE ALL SO GOOD. I am so so happy I came across your account during the pandemic while I was still in university (graduated and im already almost into 1 yr of working, ahhh it’s been so long) and even up to this day, I am still so so so in love with your writing. I just hope you will never stop writing for gojo. It’s like you mastered writing our pookiebear . Saint’s Gojo is the Godtier Gojo.

Getting emotional bc i really cant believe we are nearing the end. Whatever happens, I just know you will give us the BEST ending. I look forward to the conclusion of this arc *grabs tissue*. Can’t believe ill miss the Redflag-SY-Gojo.

Ahhh im so so proud of your hard work these past few weeks. You literally made me fell in love with Satoru and now Sylus SKSKAKAK. I hope your pillow is soft and giving you the best sleep bc I know writing masterpieces takes a LOT of work.

Sending you lots and lots of love ❤️

hiiii hi bb 🥹 tbh satoru has always seen yn as his wife. like even years after they separated. he sees her, then his mind registers ‘that’s my wife’. so when he sees yn with toji, he just goes off lmaoo i think it speaks volumes of how he hasn’t really accepted how they ended up (divorce, etc). even the way he sees himself—most of the time, he still thinks he’s yn’s hubby :’)

and noo don’t make me emotional now. i honestly can’t believe i’ve been writing this fic for years and reaching the finish line is just cathartic for me. it’s worth more than hundreds and thousands of words that i have never in my life written this much before, so it’s very close to my heart. although there are many parts of this series that i’m not proud of 🙂‍↕️ thank you though for sticking by me til the end, and for continuing to support my other fics (especially those with sylus!!) yayy <33 sending all my love back!

[munson-blurbs]

Saw your requests were open and just had an idea where Eddie survived the bat attack in s4 and is self conscious of the scars they left behind? Can be smut or fluff or fluffy smut I don’t mind :)

One fluffy fix-it fic, coming right up!

Warnings: so much fluff, so much angst, mentions of sex/nudity but no explicit details, descriptions of Demobat attack and scars, mentions of hating one's body

WC: 2.2k

A/N: Thank you for requesting this <3 I am so partial to Eddie's vulnerability, and this was really cathartic for me to write.

--

"Hey, Steve?" you turn to your friend and co-worker, who is busy checking out a group of 20-something women who just walked into Family Video. "Steve!" you call a little louder, finally getting his attention.

"Huh-what?" he looks over, flustered.

"Hi. Could you stop drooling over those college girls long enough to help me with something?" you tease, but your question is actually serious, something you need to confide in him.

Steve gives you the middle finger but rests his elbows on the counter and leans in. "Sure, fine."

"So you know how you and Robin set me up with Eddie over the summer?" you start, fiddling with your vest. You always play with your clothes when you're nervous.

"Uh-huh," he nods. "And as I recall, it was a great job on our part, because you two have been inseparable ever since." He laughs. "I call best man at the wedding, by the way."

You look down at the ground, tears welling in your eyes. "Steve, I...I don't think there's gonna be a wedding." you confess quietly, voice barely above a whisper.

"Y/N, what's going on? Are you...are you breaking up with him?" Steve looks heartbroken, almost as if you're breaking up with him and not his buddy.

"I think I have to. He's not interested in me anymore, but he won't pull the plug on it. It just keeps dragging on."

Steve wrinkles his nose and furrows his brows. He can't ask his follow-up questions because Robin bursts through the door, ten minutes late for her shift.

"Sorry, sorry, Vickie and I fell asleep and I thought I set an alarm..." she trails off after seeing the puzzled look on Steve's face and the devastated look on yours. "Who died?"

"Y/N and Eddie's relationship," Steve reports sadly as you elbow him.

"What?" Robin screeches, attracting the attention of the customers. She's unbothered by this as she continues, "why did you break up?"

"We didn't break up yet," you say as you glare at Steve, "but I can't stay in a relationship with someone who doesn't want to be with me. It's not fair to either of us."

"Is this a joke?" Robin asks you, then asks Steve: "Is she joking? She has to be joking."

Steve shrugs. "Seems pretty serious to me."

"Y/N, why on God's green Earth would you think that Munson isn't into you?" Robin's eyes keep shifting from you to Steve. "The man never shuts up about how much he loves you, how he 'found the one.' Honestly, it's kinda nauseating."

"Because..." you start, then drop your voice to a whisper, "we've been together for six months and we haven't done anything more than kiss. Fully clothed." You're so embarrassed to admit it. While most 20-year-old guys would be frothing at the mouth to sleep with their partner, or at the very least see them naked, Eddie would always pull the plug on make-out sessions once things got really heated.

Steve and Robin share a knowing look but say nothing.

"What?" you ask, desperate to be in on their secret. "What do you two know that I don't?"

Robin sighs. "Look, I'm the first person to tell girls to dump a loser boyfriend. But Eddie...his situation is more complex than that." She places a comforting hand atop yours. "Just talk to him before you end things, okay? Give him a chance to explain."

"Okay," you agree numbly, although you're not sure if you want an explanation about why your boyfriend is apparently repulsed by you.

~

After work, you drive to Eddie's trailer. He knows your work schedule and is already waiting outside, shivering in the cold December air.

"Eddie, what are you doing? It's freezing!" you call out as you turn off your car. The sound of your voice immediately puts a smile on his face.

"Waitin' for my girl to come warm me up," he walks over to your old truck to help you out, extending a hand as you hop out of the driver's seat. You take it, and as soon as your feet touch the ground, he pulls you in for a kiss. You're hesitant to return it, very aware of the impending conversation you need to have, and he senses your resistance.

"No kiss?" he asks, pouting his lips. He's so cute that it may kill you. You may literally die of Eddie Munson Sweetness Overload.

"Hey, um, Eds, can we talk inside?" you give his hand a quick squeeze. He stands frozen for a moment but then nods.

"Uh, sure. You're kinda scaring me, though." He shuffles ahead of you to open the door.

"Thanks." Your voice is barely audible. You make a beeline for the couch and pat the spot next to you. Eddie sits and takes your hands in his.

"Eddie, I need you to be honest with me. I'm tough; I can take it," you crack a small smile, trying to be brave when you actually feel like sobbing. "Do you want to be with me?"

Your boyfriend's eyes widen. "Of-of course, baby. Why would you think that I don't? I practically worship the ground you walk on. Just ask Steve and Robin!"

"Then h-how come," your voice breaks and you try to blink back tears, "how come you keep pushing me away when I try to take things farther? I don't want to pressure you, and I respect if you're not ready, but..." You feel a tear slide down your cheek and you get frustrated with your own emotions. "It's okay if you're not attracted to me," you finish quietly.

"Oh. Oh, sweetheart," he pulls you in for a tight hug, as close as he can get while sitting on a sofa. "Baby, that's not it at all. You are the most beautiful, sexy, incredibly gorgeous woman I've ever met." He rubs his eyes and you can practically see him overthinking. "Come with me," he says and leads you into his room.

"Now you're scaring me," you muse but listen. He moves an empty box of Honeycomb cereal from his bed onto his already overflowing dresser and sits you down.

"What I'm about to tell you is going to sound...insane, at the very least. But you can ask Robin and Steve. Even Dustin, although he's never much of a reliable source anyway."

And then Eddie launches into a story about a place called the Upside Down, a pseudo-Hawkins that's overrun with monsters and controlled by someone called Vecna. Vecna, he explains, is the reason why Chrissy, Fred, and Patrick died, and why Max was in a coma.

"And-and you remember the Starcourt Mall fire?" He's sputtering now, as though he's unable to stop talking now that he's started. "That damage was actually caused by a creature called the Mind Flayer. And it was defeated by Mike Wheeler's telekinetic girlfriend and Henderson's super genius girlfriend." He goes on about the Hawkins Lab, Russian involvement, government cover-ups, the Will Byers case that got his little sheep involved in this mess. You take it all in, processing the information silently.

Finally, after you stay silent for longer than Eddie would like, you tell him the words he's needed to hear: "I believe you."

"You do?"

"Yeah. There's always been something weird about this town, all of the disappearances and deaths and fires. I have a lot of follow-up questions," you joke lightly. "But...Eddie, what does this have to do with us not having sex? Does Vecna spare virgins? Because I hate to break it to you, it's a little late for both of us if that's the case."

Eddie shakes his head, tousling his curly mop of hair. "No, that's not it. When I got wrapped up in this, I was so determined to be a hero. I didn't think I had it in me, but after I played Sweetheart in the Upside Down, I just got this...rush, you know? This overwhelming urge to avenge all these deaths, to protect my friends. To be the hero I was too afraid to be outside of Hellfire." He swallows the lump in his throat.

"After Henderson and I ran back to Hawkins--the real Hawkins--the Demobats followed us. They were gonna infiltrate, so I-I went back."

"You went back?" you ask incredulously.

He offers a tight smile. "Hard to believe, isn't it? The same guy who's scared to show you a little vulnerability was voluntarily fighting off a swarm of bats in an alternate dimension."

"What happened?" you whisper, too stunned to cry, though you feel the tears prickling.

"They attacked me. It was awful. The screeching, the bites that seemed to come from all directions, like they wouldn't stop until..." He's trembling and lets out a heaving sob. "Dustin and Steve dragged me out, got me to the hospital just in time. A few more minutes and I wouldn't be here."

"No," you say involuntarily, not wanting to picture a world without Eddie Munson. Your Eddie.

"And every time I see the scars, I just think about how ugly they are, how ugly I am. I promised myself that I'd never let anyone else see them. But when I went to visit Robin and Steve at Family Video and I saw you, so damn pretty even in that horrendous uniform." You can't help but giggle at the compliment. "Harrington was totally oblivious, but Robin noticed me staring at you right away and told me that I'd be a complete moron if I survived all of that and didn't even attempt to get your number."

"That's why you came to visit when they weren't working," you mused, mostly to yourself.

"Honestly, I figured we'd go out, you'd realize what a loser I am, and that would be it. I never thought..." he brings your hand to his lips, kissing it softly, "never thought that we'd love each other this much."

"Of course I love you, Eddie. I'll always love you," you reassure him. "And I'll keep loving you after you show me your scars."

"Okay. I'll show you. But I want to warn you, even though they're healing well, they're still..."

You interrupt him gently. "It's okay. I'm ready."

Eddie nods and stands up. He slowly lifts his shirt and grimaces slightly. You stifle a gasp. His torso is marred with grotesque bite marks, fading but still prominent. There are parts of his skin that look mismatched, and you realize that the Demobats took so much of him that he needed skin grafts. You hear a sniffle; he's crying harder, and you wipe the tears from his face.

"Can I touch them?" you whisper. "Or will it hurt too much?"

"Just be gentle," he concedes. You lightly run a finger over the pink ridges, in awe of his courage.

"Eddie, you're so beautiful," you say finally and allow yourself to cry alongside him. "How could you ever believe that I'd think otherwise?" You lean in and place soft, purposeful kisses all over his chest and stomach.

"You don't think they're disgusting?" He looks down, defeated. "Because I do. I hate them. Hate them so fucking much."

"I think..." you choose your words carefully. "If I could take away the pain you went through, the pain that led to these scars, I'd do it in a heartbeat. But the scars themselves? Never." You pull him back down so he's sitting next to you again. "They're part of you, and I love every part of you."

Eddie takes your face in his strong hands and kisses you until you're both forced to come up for air.

"I'm not really ready to take my shirt off for long periods of time. I don't even like to shower anymore because I don't want to see them. I just do it so I don't smell for you." He smiles through his tears.

"And I am so appreciative," you joke back. "We don't have to do anything involving undressing until you're ready, Eds. There's no pressure, okay?" You pause for a moment before asking, "But if your concern was with me seeing you, why did you always stop me when I tried to take off my shirt?"

Eddie bows his head bashfully. "I didn't want you to think I was just some douchebag trying to get you naked without ever, y'know, reciprocating."

"So what you're saying is that you're okay with me..."

"Sweetheart, I am more than okay with that," he murmurs, pressing another kiss to your lips. "I think about it more than one man should, honestly."

You pull your legs underneath you and snuggle into Eddie's chest. "Good to know." He looks at you amusedly and you clarify. "I'm being serious! I'm glad you like the way I look. I was worried that you didn't."

His arm snakes its way over your shoulder. "Never want you to feel like that again."

You hold out your pinky. "Promise me that we won't hide from each other anymore. When something upset us, about ourselves or about each other, we'll be honest about it."

Eddie smiles, a sight so beautiful that it takes your breath away. He wraps his pinky around yours.

"I promise."

--

[hellwurld]

do u guys ever think about how the partners of those on the qsmp are gods and/or godesses in the lore. unrelated did u know that tommyinnit and tubbo underscore are legally married. just thought that was interesting.

Tubbo is, admittedly, not the best person. 

He’s kind of a bit of a dick. He’s reckless, doesn’t have much regard for his own personal safety, let alone others, and he can be callous and rude and prickly and blunt. He’s not afraid to push buttons, literally or metaphorically, and he can be... explosive. Destructive, even. To say the least.

On further introspection, Tubbo realizes that he’s actually a lot more than a bit of a dick. 

He doesn’t deserve this though. Probably.

Tubbo can’t remember much, but he’s almost entirely sure that he’s done nothing to deserve this. Literally no crime ever committed, ever, is worth this punishment.

“I hate you,” Tubbo sighs, for the ninetieth time in the past four minutes, “I hate you so much.” He pulls off his jacket, slipping his arms out of the sleeves and tossing the jacket in the general direction of the prick that can’t quite leave him alone. Tommy recoils at the jacket thrown across his face suddently, letting out a —incredibly cathartic for Tubbo— squak of surprise. Tubbo stomps away, leaving Tommy to reel away in his overblown, exaggerated horror at Tubbo’s dastardly actions, or whatever.

“This is, quite literally, very homophobic of you, Toby,” Tommy says, all faux-shock and concern, like Tubbo will believe him for a second. “Truly just so homophobic, I’m writing a twitlonger as we speak because Jesus, Toby—”

“You’re not even gay!” Tubbo bites out, left eye twitching. He stomps away, leaviTommy gasps at this, and Tubbo reminds himself that wringing his neck is not an option, despite it looking more and more appealing by the second.

“Oh, and how do you know that?” Tommy argues, walking right on Tubbo’s heels, “You really can’t base things on stereotypes, Toby, it’s incredibly offensive, you know? Just because I look straight and sound straight and act straight and— Oh, hi Em— say I’m straight doesn’t mean I am. What about me is straight to you?”

“Well, maybe the girlfriend, if I had to hazard a guess,” Tubbo says sarcastically, “Although I suppose that’s not relevant right now?”

He’s joking, obviously, because it’s very relevant.

“Oh Toby— Toby, Toby, Toby. Sweet, young Toby,” Tommy starts, and Tubbo knows he is not planning on stopping, “Of course, that’s not relevant. I’m talking about our marriage!”

“We’re not married,” Tubbo says, for the one-hundred ninetieth time in the last five minutes. 

“Oh, ho-ho, but we are!” Tommy says, and Tubbo weighs the pros and cons of killing himself rapidly and graphically by throwing himself out of the nearest possible window. The pros are not currently outweighing the cons, but with how this conversation is going, they probably will soon.

“Sign the fucking divorce papers, Tommy,” Tubbo sighs, a little angry about how long this has been going on for, but mostly tired and resigned. And angry, because Tommy’s neck is looking so, so wringable right now, but mostly tired.

Tommy just laughs, and disappears in that frustrating, echoey way they all do. Em’s never far behind him, but Tubbo dispairingly turns to her at the kitchen counter anyway, for his own comfort. To her credit, she does offer him a smile, but at best it’s pitying, and at worst it’s amused. Tubbo thinks it might be both.

“I’d say I’m sorry, but I think we both know it’s going to take more than that to get him to sign those papers,” Em says, and Tubbo groans.

“Why don’t you tell him?” Tubbo asks, desperate, but knowing the answer anyway.

“Because this way, it’s—”

“One thousand times funnier,” Tubbo finishes for her. He lacks the energy to even attempt to mock Tommy’s tone, but Tubbo hears his voice ringing in his head anyway. Em laughs, and then she disappears too. Tubbo squints at the place where they both were, like if he stares for long enough they will both reappear as reasonable, normal, willing-to-sign-the-divorce-papers sort of people. They don’t, because God hates Tubbo, and the world hates Tubbo, and the universe hates Tubbo.

The only thing that the universe did right was make sure that Tommy didn’t have the foresight to make him sign a prenup. At least Tubbo can get Tommy’s money when he finally signs the divorce papers.

If he ever signs the divorce papers.

Tubbo slams his head against the wall again.

-

Tubbo_: never get married

pactw: ?

Tubbo_: dont do it pac

pactw: ???????

[evansbby]

GIRLIE GIRLIE GIRLIE LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN. I HAVE AN IDEA FOR A REQUEST.

[Its also 03:57AM and I’m crying my eyes out, so I might regret this when I woke up lolllll]

Hear me out, hear me out, hear me out. See the visionnnnn. So, this is my request:

Sugar daddy!Ari AU. This is a little after the reader becomes his girlfriend. The reader hasn’t really gotten it into her head that she’s not just his sugar baby, but she’s his love, so she tends to hide her feelings and pain and raw emotions from him because she wants to sort of keep up the image of her being his sexy personal nymphomaniac because she thinks he’ll leave if she’s real with him.

So let’s say, something happened. Maybe an argument with her terrible family or her shitty friends gossip about her or she’s burnt out from taking care of others or someone shames her for something, idk, you’re the author, you decide what happens, but anyways.

Something happens that made her extremely sad and miserable, but she’s trying to hide her feelings from Ari, she pretends everything is fine (it’s not lol), she’s acting a little weird cos she’s trying to keep up appearances so that he won’t dismiss and discard her, etc. But Ari, being her daddy and the smart motherfucker he is, knows that something is wrong with his precious girl.

So basically, shit goes down with her and Ari and he soft doms her (maybe a little hard dom too) and comforts her and reassures her that she’s his girl and not just a plaything and all that lovey dovey shit. Oh, and aftercare lol! Only if you want to.

This probably could’ve been said in fewer words, but I’m crying my eyes out and it’s a little cathartic to type this out lol, sorryyyy. Thank youuuu! Love your writing!

Oh I would love to read this 😭😭😭

But you see I’m insane so I need to make it more sad so if I were to write this…

I’d make it so that reader is very insecure and she thinks she’s not good enough to be Ari’s girlfriend (kind of along the lines of what you said) and she thinks she’s only good enough for sex bc she has zero feelings of self worth 🤧🤧🤧 and no matter what Ari says or does to reassure her and uplift her, she just doesn’t believe him😔😔

And she keeps pushing herself away from him, bc she thinks he deserves better bc he’s such a nice guy and it’s not a normal sugar daddy relationship bc Ari doesn’t even expect sex from her (although they do have great amazing perfect sex) but Ari just loves talking to her all night, getting to know her interests, buying her special gifts that match her interests… And reader is overwhelmed bc she’s sooo insecure and she thinks she doesn’t deserve this happiness. She’s scared of letting herself be happy in case Ari “wakes up” one day and realises he can do better and leaves her🥲 (he wouldn’t but she thinks he will).

So then one day she gets so overwhelmed that she breaks up with him impulsively. But we all know what a strong mature wise perfect daddy Ari is, so he’d be like “let’s talk this out” and she bursts into tears and tells him that he deserves better and that she’s broken and she needs to go away so he can start living his life instead of always worrying about her 🥲🥲🥲 and Ari tells her that he’s in love with her and he couldn’t live without her and then they have sex 🥺🥺🥺 where Ari is being a soft dom and sooo perfect and sexy and reader needed this bc she needs him to tell her what to do so she can relax and stop worrying. Her mind never turns off during the day and she’s wracked with insecurities and fear, but with Ari… he lets her mind go blank so she doesn’t need to think, and she feels okay.

But then she’s up all night and Ari is asleep and she watches him and all her insecurities come back and she thinks that he deserves better and he can’t spend his whole life with her as a burden just bc she’s so insecure all the time 🥲🥲

So she leaves… without a note or a phone call or anything. In fact, she moves far away to live with a distant relative and deletes her social media. Ari calls her and texts her every single day, begging her to pick up or come back etc and she changes her phone number 🥲🥲🥲 some of her friends tell her that Ari is miserable and he’s still looking for her and waiting for her but she hopes he will move on soon.

Anyways then reader starts working on herself, she gets a job in an industry she likes and she makes some new friends. She starts seeing a therapist and slowly, bit by bit, her confidence starts to grow. She realises she deserves love as much as anyone else does. And she misses Ari so much bc he really was the love of her life 🥹🥹 it’s been a whole year now and one day she decides she wants to see him again. She wants to try again and hopefully he’d be open to getting back together with her.

She shows up at his door with Chinese takeaway (their favourite meal they’d have together) and Ari answers the door and he’s shocked to see her. And she says she thinks she’s all whole again, she thinks she’s fixed and she’d like to give it a try with him once more. And she got food 🍲

But then she looks beyond his shoulder and sees another girl. And Chinese takeaway already on the table. He’s moved on. She’s heartbroken. But she smiles and tells him she’s happy for him. He tries to stop her but she leaves.

THE END 😭😭😭😭

[tio-trile]

Obligatory sorry if you're fed up with GO2 asks!

I'm a new fan of the show (like, a few weeks after season 2 came out a friend lent me their Prime acc to binge watch everything) and haven't read the book at all but!

It's like in S1 Crowley and Aziraphale exist in the world and in S2 the world exists for them kind of,, in S1 the point of view shifted almost constantly and at the end the plotlines converged together in a cathartic moment for all of our beloved characters, but in S2 it's just,, present Aziracrow and past Aziracrow,, which is fine, I liked that they showcased the way they were and are with each other but it would've been better if there were less of these moments.

Talking about these, I saw that a lot of people on Tumblr were excited to see Crowley as an angel and it could've been good but. I don't get why Aziraphale HAD to be here, or more like HAD to interact with him and remember/recognize him later, and I'm not really thrilled about the fact that Crowley is implied to be someone important! It just feels like Crowley and Aziraphale aren't equals anymore ; Crowley Always Knows Best he admittedly was someone pretty important in heaven before and he feels more Holier Than Thou than the literal angel he's with?? I get that he Fell so he already knows for sure that Heaven is corrupt but,, I don't know, I feel like Aziraphale lost agency and just Can't Do Anything Right anymore! (And Crowley Can't Do Anything Wrong anymore either??)

I found the flashbacks for ineffable bureaucracy quite adorable but it was all too sudden! It feels the Gabriel mystery just wasn't progressing at all during the season and at the last minute, ta-dahh here's an exposition dumb on what happened, no build-up for the now canon pairing. Not a big fan of amnesia in general but even less when the amnesic character just gets everything back for a dramatic reveal scene, maybe I would have felt like things actually happened in this season if Gabriel was slowly able to access some memories. We could have had the build-up of him and Beelzebub planning on escaping together in the flashbacks! (And I mean, I get that there was the fly and the song but,, It didn't really affect Gabriel/Jim so it doesn't feel,,, enough?)

I was completely indifferent to Maggie and Nina. Also could've worked better as a separate POV from Aziracrow. I just didn't get enough scenes to care for them or feel any chemistry. Nina was already in a relationship, and Maggie was just crushing on her. They didn't really get together at the end but they're involved enough in the idea of them getting together in the future to give Crowley love advice and for Maggie to wait for Nina. I just don't really get it? If the goal was Maggie and Nina getting together, then they needed more time and scenes. If the goal was that they would not get together because Aziraphale and Crowley were trying to force them to be, then why saying that they "only needed a little push," that Maggie is "willing to wait for Nina," why both give love advice to a guy they barely know when they barely know each other too?

Anyways, I really liked the show (and am still eager for a potential S3)! But I feel like Neil Gaiman's writing is missing a similar style to Terry's (though obviously I wouldn't know what his writing is like since I. Haven't read the book nor other books from this/both of these actually authors), and important reoccurring characters besides Aziraphale and Crowley.

Yes, I agree with a lot of your points! And it's very interesting for me to hear that we share a lot of the same opinions although coming from different places -- being an older book fan and being a newer show-only fan. "S1 Crowley and Aziraphale exist in the world and in S2 the world exists for them" is exactly right, and similar to what I complained about not liking them "being the main characters". And I completely agree with that even if we see Angel!Crowley, Aziraphale doesn't have to be there, and also not liking that Crowley was somebody important before. And yeah, I've said it before but the Gabriel mystery and even the Nina/Maggie romance have potential, but ends up falling flat. Thank you for the ask! Apology accepted.

[absolutebl]

Hey absolutebl, I am a TV writer with a very strong and personal interest in BL series. Living in Thailand for many years, I was asked by a friend Thai actor to give BL series a shot, to see the foreigner perspective on Thai tv dramas/BL stories... and here I am. I have developed 2 series so far, TRUTH & DARE and IMPERFECT MATCH, and written their respective pilot episodes.

I mentioned "personal interest" because, as a gay writer, I find it almost therapeutic to write these stories, although it would be cathartic to see them sold and produced haha!

I'd love to read your opinion on something...

I have read your discussions about language, which I find very interesting. Personally, having lived in Thailand for many years, I am more than used to the language, but not able to write it, so I write these stories in English. I know this will throw off more than one Thai producer, but I believe my stories are universal and should be easily adapted to many different languages without losing their uniqueness. Details of the story, settings, names... can always be changed to localize the series and make them culturally relevant. Do you think this is a valid argument when it comes to explaining to a producer why is the series not presented in Thai? Thanks in advance for your feedback!

Okay, you did come to this blog, so presumably you know what you're in for. But if you want the nice answer, you should stop reading right now.

Still here?

You're not gonna like this, but I think if you're pitching to Thai production the script should be written in Thai.

One of the things i keep running into learning Thai is that linguistically there is a cap on comprehension without the script, not just comprehension of the language but of the way it fits within culture. And you're pitching to a studio house that sits within THAT culture. On a very basic level the burden is on you to meet them in their world, not foist yours upon them. And their world is Thai. It smacks of both western entitlement and farang rudeness to do otherwise. Like not taking your shoes off in an Asian house. You're in their house, honor their culture, that includes the written one.

There's also an artistic component to this on a core linguistic level with regards to comprehension.

How do I put this?

It's like... you can't do an oil painting on watercolor paper, it has to be done on cavas. The art side of language impacts creativity at a root level, especially visually. And all languages are creative because they are living evolving artistic endeavors as well as tools for communication. The way something is written down, the words as pictures, is part of that endeavor. The true bones of your story can't be communicated properly to a team if they're obfuscated by a whole different suite of linguistics.

English, under this context, just feels... wrong. It's a brutal, cumbersome, lumbering beast of a language when compared to Thai. Full of excess words and redundancies, stunted and plain when forced into brevity.

And it will LOOK that way when slapped down on a desk in front of a Thai staffer. It will look ugly, and bloated, and shocking, and unpleasant to the subconscious of a non-English speaker, and when compared with all the Thai scripts they have read before or after it will be judged and found inferior.

Also, I suspect you're young (no offense) but no story is universal. No book appeals to everyone. I, for example, happen to have always (from the get go) been highly indifferent to Harry Potter.

Side tracked.

On a purely business front:

The point of a pitch is to get through barriers and into production.

By pitching in the wrong language, you give yourself an insurmountable barrier.

Remember what studios are looking for, first and foremost, is a reason to say NO. They are always looking for the flaws, always. Not being in Thai is not just a flaw it's a red flag against you personally as someone they want to work with.

You really want my feedback? Put your scripts down, sign up for a three month immersion class and learn the Thai script instead.

In the long run, the thing learning how to write in another language does most for you as a creative writer, is expand your artistic brain in new directions. So your stories will actually come out more inventive, more adaptable, and, yes, more universal as a result. I guarantee it.

See what happens? You come for feedback and I gave you stern words and a homework assignment.

On the other hand, you can wander in with you script in English and see what happens. The worst thing is you get rejected. Or laughed at. Or ignored.

I'm just some scmuck on tumblr. What tf do I know?

[letstalkwhump]

Let's Talk Whump

Let's Talk Whump is a series of interviews with the wonderful members of the whump community. I'm Malice and I'll be your host. Joining us today is the one and only @oddsconvert !

Welcome to Let’s Talk Whump! Do you mind sharing a little about yourself?

Hi there, I’m Shannon! I’m a 21 year old psychology and criminology graduate from the UK! My favourite colour is yellow. I basically have a zoo of pets bahaha; I have four cats, a dog, a rabbit, two rats, three fish and two tarantulas (not mine - they terrify the life out of me!)

When I’m not whumping and traumatising my fictional babies, I love to crochet, listening to/playing music (I play piano, guitar, clarinet and ukulele), and I’m currently teaching myself to draw…for whump purposes ;)

What does whump mean to you? 

For me, whump is freedom and release. Not only is it enjoyable, almost like scratching an itch? But it’s cathartic, and what I now see as a healthy coping mechanism for managing difficult feelings and a way to navigate my own trauma. Although, looking back, whump has been something that’s always been an interest of mine since early childhood, and has stuck ever since! Like rewinding disney films when the princes get tied up ahahah.

And also the comfort element of whump, I think it also helps me explore wants and desires in my own life. Writing my caretakers and their fierce protectiveness, and unconditional care over whumpees feels like it heals a part of me that maybe needed that at times. It gives you such a heartwarming feeling when you see these characters go through hell and back, and have someone to fall on at the end who will be there through thick and thin, regardless how choppy the water gets. 

And how did you find the whump community? What made you want to join? 

I used to scour pinterest for writing prompts! I only ever wrote in private, I’ve never EVER shared my work publicly before and never dreamed I would. But the more and more whumpy pins I was saving I was like “hmmm. These all come from the same site! Let’s go check that out” and then I scrolled the  #whump tag for endless hours instead of doing my university dissertation. I remember coming across @deluxewhump and @darkthingshappen first!

At first I joined as a faceless, lurking blog. I really wanted to hop in and join all the creators I was loving so far but I was terrified. I think I had a bio as something like “working up the courage to post.” And then some lovely anon sent me my first ask saying they’d love to see what I’d post! And I slowly crept out of my shell and bit by bit started building my profile and adding my name and posting my whump drabbles!

Pinterest whump prompts gang rise up! That’s exactly how I found the community too! Has your view on whump changed since you joined? 

I used to be ashamed of liking whump. Like it was some dirty little secret that made me a terrible person and I should keep it to myself. Hide it at all costs. Since joining, and interacting with this world-wide community of whump enjoyers, I realised it’s not something that should be taboo. If anything, it almost feels normal! Look how many thousands love it! And every single whump creator I’ve had the pleasure of meeting has been so kind, supportive and such genuine people! 

It really feels like coming home when you find the whump community and realise you’re not a weirdo! Would you like to share your favourite whump tropes? 

I’ve definitely discovered more about my whump taste! I used to just purely like captivity whump, usually with creepy/intimate whumpers. That was always my go to. Now? I’ve discovered SO many tropes I never even knew about and love! BBU?! Pet whump, whumper turned whumpee, bad caretaker, vampire whump, sickfics, hero/villain and so much more! 

Non-optional, you have to share a favourite piece you've written? Hype yourself up, we want to hear it!

Without a doubt, my first ever chapter of ‘Shattered’ - my bloodbag whumpee/vampire whump series. I’m usually very self-critical of my writing, but I really love how this one came out and how well it was written. I pretty much never get whumperflies off my own writing, but my poor sweet Declan - just living dead and the way Vince is forced to take care of him. 

But also honorary mention - my latest chapter of ‘Play Pretend’ . Play Pretend is my baby, and it was the first chapter of this series I had beta’d by my wonderful friend @whumpcereal and I felt like she just took it to the next level and kicked it up a notch. Josh’s fear and exhaustion came to life and I really enjoyed writing his inner monologue!

You weren’t kidding about the whumperflies in “Shattered”! Hot damn! What's your writing schedule usually look like? 

Night time for sure! Dead of night - 3am most often ahaha. I’m a night owl, through and through. I’ll try and write in the day and nothing comes and then night comes and I’m like brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, whole chapter done! I usually have some music on in the background, sometimes I make a specific playlist for whatever vibe I’m feeling! And I mostly write when the inspiration strikes, as much as I can get out until the motivation vanishes.

And do you find that the words flow better for somethings than others?

For me, I find it really easy to write my creepy/intimate whumper scenes. For Play Pretend, writing Felix’s deranged and creepy obsession with Josh just comes so naturally (maybe I should be concerned…). The way he’s so unsettling but so adoring with how he speaks to Josh and touches him, I could write it in a heartbeat.

More recently I’ve been trying to delve into the nsfw portions of whump and writing. But I’m a newbie with it, and I really struggle with writing it or making it sound good. 

Is there anything you're working on at the moment?

My usual schedule swings around, I update my series in an order. It tends to be, A Taste of Your Own Medicine, Shattered, then Play Pretend - and I’ve just updated ATOYOM so Shattered is up next! I’m primarily working on a flashback chapter with August currently! But I dot in and out of future chapters too.

I also have planned future whump series to come whenever my current ones finish up! But that’s a little while off yet. 

Give us some writing advice. Bless us with your wisdom, oh awesome one!!!!!

I WILL SCREAM THIS FROM THE ROOFTOPS - WRITE FOR YOU!

Never ever write based on what you think people like/don’t like.  The absolute joy in writing is the freedom in putting the pen to paper, or cursor to doc , and just letting your imagination run wild. Your audience is out there. People that will love and cheer for your writing, and I think you can really tell when an author has enjoyed and had fun with what they’ve written. There’s no good in getting bogged down with what others think. 

Write for you, post for you, and if others hop along for the ride - all the better!

Is there anyone you’d like to give a shout-out to?

I love absolutely everyone in this community, I’m gonna tag so many people - my besties alongside some of my favourite blogs and creators. Ily all you talented people. 

@whumpcereal @darkthingshappen @sparrowsage @quietly-by-myself @whumpsday @for-the-love-of-angst @emmettnet @turn-the-tables-on-them @yetanotheraltwhumpblog @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @pigeonwhumps @whumpshaped @t0rture-me @ha-ha-one @not-a-space-alien @whump-queen @justsomewhumpee @livelaughwhump @writereleaserepeat and I’M PROBABLY MISSING SOME BUT YOU’RE ALL AWESOME

Finally, anything you'd like to add? 

The whump community has quickly started to feel like home to me, I have a lotta love for whumpblr and every soul I’ve met here! Thank you so much for having me and to whoever nominated me!

It’s been a pleasure! 

Happy whumping, people!

Thank you so much for joining us today, @oddsconvert! And to all you awesome folk at home, have a whump-derful day!

[veilder]

please excuse my word vomit but I shortened the hell out of my caption to avoid being annoying and your tags on my art sent me into a frenzy haha

so my favorite pre relationship dynamic for convin (and in my current fic) they start out as enemies with benefits who accidentally develop feelings but are in denial and know the smart thing to do is to stop and so every time they hook up is the last time (until the next time). and you’re right I drew gavin with the pained expression bc he’s the first one to realize his feelings are feelings but he doesn’t think he deserves connor and he thinks connor wants this to stay physical and that hurts but 1. he thinks he deserves the hurt and 2. he’ll take what he can get for as long as he can get it (hahaha ow). I’m allergic to happy endings in my own writing but I wholly support your happily ever after 😄

also no pressure at all just floating the idea but I’d be so down if you ever wanted to do a collab :] anyways yeah I’m happy you liked my pic and your comments always bring me joy, keep on being wonderful

Omggggggg, what a great ask to get!!! Thank you so much for sending this! 🤩🤩🤩 So, one, your idea behind your art is wonderful and fits them both perfectly. Two idiots getting in over their heads and catching feelings? Yep, that's them, lol. Although, I'm already imagining a happy ending for the two of them, even in that scenario, so whoops! XD I know for me, when I saw your art I was thinking that they were set to be separated. Specific scenarios were still up in the air (i.e. investigation gone awry, some sort of terminal condition, human!AU college fling, historical!AU, etc), but there would be some sort of circumstance that would drive the two of them apart. And this would be the scene of them making the most of their last days together, with Connor throwing his whole self into it while Gavin, in an effort to make the inevitable separation hurt less, begins to withdraw, even though it hurts him. And it would lead to a really messy breakup where they both say hurtful things and are just left with so many regrets. But then... there would be some sort of timeskip and they would meet again, both very changed now but never forgetting the impact the other had on their life. And again, something would force them together, whether it's work or some sort of mystery or even just running into each other over and over again. And they would both realize that the other hasn't really changed as much as they initially thought. That he's still the man they fell in love with. And that those feelings are far from dead. And eventually, things would rekindle in a burst of passion and long-held feelings and it would be terrible and beautiful and cathartic and so, so painful all at once. They'd wake to a morning of regrets and, in their fear, again try to sever ties. But they'd be miserable about it and all the life would drain from their days. That burst of brightness they'd slowly brought back to each other has once again vanished and they're both left in the dark. And then, idk, the plot would pull them together one final time and they'd get to have their moments of peril and heroics and emotional confessions. And finally, finally they'd confess their feelings for each other. The feelings they've had for so, so long. And they'd both realize what absolute dipshits they've both been, that they've both felt the same way for years and were just too emotionally constipated to do anything about it. And then I'd probably undercut it with some sort of big BLAMO moment where one of them gets taken out by the bad guy (I've decided that there's a bad guy now XD) and they'd be dying in the other's arms. And you'd think that that's it! That, after so much build up and them finally getting on the same page with each other, that they won't get their happily ever after after all. But then idk, there'd be some clever deus ex machina I seeded into the story early on that comes through for them and they both live and the bad guy goes to jail and everything is GOOD! And then sappy epilogue. XD ...Ugh, see? Look what you're making me consider here with your beautiful art?! I'm plotting. Multi-chapter plotting! UGH! 😫😫😫 No, but seriously, I adore that art and felt so damn inspired when I saw it? I wish I'd had more energy to do something with that, but alas! I was just getting off work and it was very late. 😓😓😓 BUT THEN YOU SENT THIS AND MENTIONED A COLLAB AND NOW IT'S ALSO VERY LATE HERE BUT I'M JUST 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 BECAUSE DAMN SON, I WOULD LOVE TO COLLAB?! Like, I legit cannot make any promises, I've had the worst case of writer's block ever now for a couple years and counting. But even if it's just, idk, discussing ideas or chatting about these idiots or something, I'd so be down for it! Definitely feel free to hmu whenever!!! I'd love to chat!!! :D

[welcometololaland]

Binged Read "living at the centre of would...." tonight, and i am in tears, I just love love your writing so damn much Lola 🫶🏼 You grip on Characters and their Characterization is so strong. I have read every single of your Lone star fics till date. You are my Favorite author!! I have specially made a tumblr account to reach out to the beautiful writers of this fandom and appreciate them and let you'll know that you all matter so very much to us!!!

Can't wait to read what more beautiful things you put for us, i m specifically so intrested in ALTA ( just genuine excitement and want to share the Excitement , no pressure, please take your time,m very patient lmao)

Never Understood Grief so wonderfully and truthfully before!

Thank You <3

(ALTA SNIPPET BELOW CUT)

Thank you so much! The honeymoon fic was difficult for me to write (because I don't often write angst), but it was also incredibly cathartic. I think it helped me process a lot of my own feelings about season 4 episodes 17 and 18, and also made me think deeper about Carlos in particular and his state of mind in these episodes.

I feel honoured to know you have read so many of my stories! I hope they brought you joy <3 I think it's awesome you made a tumblr account to tell people that you like their work!

ALTA is finished, but it is in beta-phase. I'm not sure when it will be ready but I'm hoping to post ch 1 soon(ish). This fic has been so fiddly and difficult, I don't think I've EVER spent so much time nitpicking. I've re-written and re-worked the chapters so many times it's insane. Never write a mystery, guys. It's HARD lol. Here, have a snippet (it's unbeta-d, don't judge me).

Summer Break, June 2015

“Carlos,” TK sighs, sliding himself into the passenger seat of Carlos’ car, jiggling the ancient manual windows to wind them down, allowing fresh air in. Carlos knows he’s going to have to get a better car one day – he can’t keep driving around in something that has no AC in the middle of Texas – but he’s also a broke student and his father isn’t a movie star. Not that he’ll be reminding TK of that, lest he turn up to TK’s house one day and find himself presented with a brand new Range Rover.

Although, given recent events, he’s never going to be able to set foot in TK’s house again.

“Carlos,” TK repeats with a little huff, leaning back against the seat as Carlos backs out of Owen’s driveway. “Why are you so mad? It’s not like this is the first time this has happened—”

“TK,” Carlos exclaims, one hand tapping the steering wheel in exasperation. “Your dad walked in and we were—”

“My dad has walked in on us loads of times,” TK argues. “He has no sense of privacy, you know that.”

“Yes, but—”

“One time he caught me practically giving you a blowjob, remember?” TK interjects. “I think it was the first time you met him, actually—”

“TK!” Carlos practically cries. “How are you not more concerned about the fact that your dad walked in while you were riding me?”

TK shrugs. “I don’t know,” he replies, infuriatingly calm. “We’re adults and adults have sex, right? I don’t think anyone in the Strand household is under any illusions as to why the pool house was out of bounds for six months straight.”

Carlos has a sudden urge to take a random left hand turn and drive them into another state. He’s not sure he can bear to be in the same timezone as Owen Strand, knowing that he’s seen them in such a compromising position. On second thoughts, Carlos wishes he could drive to Antarctica.

“Seriously, baby,” TK says, holding his palm up on the centre console, begging for Carlos’ touch. “It’s going to be okay. I bet my dad won’t even say anything. I mean, he might make an awkward joke about it but trust me, he doesn’t care.”

Carlos blows out a breath. “I don’t know,” he replies with uncertainty. “I’m beginning to think we should move out.”

Out of his peripherals, he can see TK practically bounce in the passenger seat. “Some place other than your college dorm?” he asks. “Carlos, that would be—”

“I’m not serious,” Carlos interjects, then feels terrible about it when he looks across at TK’s face and sees it fall. “Wait, hang on, I didn’t mean—”

TK retracts his hand and brings it to his face, covering his mouth as he turns to look out of the passenger-side window. 

“TK,” Carlos calls, sighing as he pulls over to the kerb and throws the car into park. “TK, look at me.”

TK turns back slowly, a sad frown etched into his features. “I get it,” he says, a little despondently. “I mean, I’d be terrible to live with. I know you think I’m spoiled and I don’t know how to do anything, and I do hate chores but I’d do them if it meant I got to live with you.”

“I don’t think any of those things,” Carlos says softly, reaching across the space between them to rest his palm on TK’s leg. “Sweetheart, I’d love nothing more than to live with you—”

“I do hate chores,” TK admits. “Come on, that part is true.”

“Okay,” Carlos concedes, allowing his lips to curl into a smile as he watches TK’s do the same. “If we’re being honest, you suck at chores. But I’m sure you could get good at them, with practice.”

“Maybe,” TK says, wrinkling his nose. “I hear you’re a pretty good teacher.”

“I am,” Carlos replies seriously, leaning halfway across the console to kiss the tip of TK’s nose and then his lips. “I want to live with you, TK,” he says. “I just can’t afford that right now. Plus, we’re young. Maybe it’s a good idea to wait until we finish college at least.”

“And give my dad more opportunities to walk in on us?” TK asks, arching an eyebrow. “Your funeral, Reyes.”

Carlos shrugs, trying to school his expression. “Oh no, that’s not happening,” he says smoothly. “We just can’t have sex at your place anymore.”

“What are you suggesting?” TK scoffs. “That we have sex in your dorm room? Because Darren is gonna have to get real cool with some stuff pretty quickly…”

Carlos shakes his head. “I was thinking more like abstinence.”

TK chokes. “Abst— No, Carlos. Abstinence does not work when your boyfriend looks like this.” He flourishes his hands in Carlos’ direction, motioning to the entire top half of his body.

“Was thinking we could wait until marriage,” Carlos teases, turning the ignition back on as TK squawks. 

“Okay,” he says, “I guess we’re getting married tomorrow.”

“Not legal yet,” Carlos points out. “Guess we’ll have to wait a while.”

[karouvas]

🔥 anything tsc related

the biggest problem with Queen of Air and Darkness to me is that it really should have been two books. I really enjoy the grief exploration in that book in the wake of Livvy’s death felt cathartic to me on reread and I find Julian’s switch-off arc in relation to that fascinating. I enjoy Thule in terms of how it ties into the main arc with the blackthorns although I’m not crazy about the twp set ups from it. Basically there’s quite a bit in that book I do like but as a finale it’s rushed and disappointing. I also do think either Julian or Emma or both dying would have made the ending slay and I say this as someone who clearly looooves them both and Blackstairs (considering how much I love blackstairs as it is think I would be even more insane about it if we got full tragic potential realized).

Grace x Lucie is thee toxic yuri dynamic in tsc and I think ya’ll are cowards for not paying attention to it. Literally the only reason I would reread tlh is to write fic about them ChoI era because someone should.

on a related note Lucie Herondale reads as a lesbian to me, she says at one point she’s never been attracted to a boy other than Jesse who is kind of a phantom she can make into whatever she wants / project storybook romance tropes onto in a sense for most of the books and she reads as more attracted to Cordelia with the whole ‘Beautiful Cordelia’ fanfiction and like I said her most interesting dynamic with the most chemistry is her and Grace, so yeah I get comp het vibes personally I know that’s my subjective read.

I’m pretty neutral on Clary sometimes I really liked her sometimes I was frustrated by her but I do think this counts as unpopular since most either hate or love her. I do think she falls into the 2010s heroine who is written to have an overly romantically focused arc but all her interesting bits of characterization are about tangential platonic dynamics that the author doesn’t care to elaborate on much… but also this could be an ungenerous or overly generous assessment since it’s been years since I touched og tmi. I do side eye some people for giving Jace a lot of grace to be ‘complex’ and process his trauma and be dismissive of how much she goes through in the books ( I kind of hate Jace. without nuance)

I think I deserve one on one Tessa and Julian interactions in twp, not for any logical reason I just think I deserve it since they’re my two favorite tsc characters. And there’s a lot of fan service in recent tsc anyway… let me have this.

Kieran is overrated I don’t dislike him and enjoy him in the context of Kierarktina and as a foil to Julian, but I don’t fervently love him the way a lot of people do. (I also really disliked his fandom when the tda books were coming out so that might influence this).

I want Thule! Emma to come into play in twp … I’m very interested in the idea of her in the aftermath of Thule Julian and Sebastian’s deaths. I had an idea for a fic about her but didn’t write it partly because of laziness partly because I felt I’d have to go back to tmi to remember endarkened lore for that.

Grace Blackthorn discourse was kind of unserious… not because I don’t think people can have valid reasons to dislike her obviously those exist. What she did to James was sexual assault and of course fans who hate her for it are valid. But I COULD NOT with some of statements about her especially on twitter that were like ‘well if she was a Male Character ya’ll would never forgive her and she would never get a redemption arc she only does cause she’s a pretty white girl’ like GORL. GORL what universe are you living in what paranormal/fantasy media do you consume and engage in fandoms for if you think that a male character who does a nebulous magical consent violation is going to get Less grace (no pun intended) from the narrative and fandom than a female character and would NEVER get a redemption arc. I can’t even ya’ll are dumb. If I’m being really generous maybe they just don’t read/watch a lot of paranormal media other than tsc because otherwise I…

Thanks for the ask <3

(send me a 🔥+topic/fandom and I’ll give some unpopular opinions)

[chainofclovers]

Ted Lasso 3x10 Thoughts

I intended to write this last week, but I’ve been really busy. But 3x10 was a real joy, so I do want to capture something about it, so I’m just gonna try to quickly hit the highlights and any of it sounds similar to stuff I said in discord, so be it. 🙂

Rebecca spit tea in Ted’s face! She was planning it! He liked it! I loved it!

OK but really, everything about that moment…Rebecca reclaiming the Hockney, and the way it no longer signifies the loss of her marriage (and I think it’s so interesting that Rebecca says in 1x1 that she and Rupert bought it together on their fifth anniversary, but in this episode Rupert asks her about the Hockney “he” bought for “her”), and now that it’s back on the wall the drawing is about football again, and she’s wearing a flowy pink dress reminiscent of what she wore on the boat in Amsterdam but this time it’s something she would have picked out and purchased herself that suits her perfectly, and the Hockney scene blends so perfectly into her telling Ted that her reasons for wanting to win. Exchanging victory plans followed by a quick but thorough dousing of liquid via spitting ritual…it was so 1x10 of them. 

@talldecafcappuccino said something about Nate facing some of his worst fears (as articulated at the team movie night in s1) in this episode—he is unemployed, and he makes a return (albeit temporary) to his parents’ house—and that really stuck with me. That moment when he reminds his dad that he literally told him he hated the sound of Nate playing violin is a remember-forever moment for me. Some of the parents on this show are true villains, but I think it’s as important if not more important to depict the very real pain that comes from that mismatch between thought and speech, the damage that can be done bit by bit even when intentions are good, even when a parent genuinely desires good things for their child. I’m doing a terrible job articulating it, but I appreciated the small-yet-ultra-concentrated scale of all the Nate moments very much. 

Speaking of the scale of things, the grand yet quiet gesture of Nate getting Rene from the sewers to let him into the club (why are sewers so important to this show?) to fix up the locker room for Will…the sprig of lavender…the simple heartfelt apology…the intentional use of “Wonder Kid." Loved it. Completely loved it. I’m really looking forward to what’s going to happen with Nate and Ted talk, but it was completely essential that he reaches out to Will first, and that it’s an action-oriented apology that is specifically about the nature of a kitman’s work. 

Speaking again of the scale of things: Rebecca’s speech to the other potential Akufo League owners. I’m very glad it was a monologue and not a soliloquy. In-scene, non-fourth-wall-breaking speeches are always a tiny bit bigger than what my personal sensibilities w/r/t secondhand embarrassment would prefer. But they are essential to Ted Lasso. And I think Rebecca’s speech absolutely had to be scaled big—she literally made herself bigger right beforehand, in this lovely moment of honoring her child self and connecting to the silliness of the ritual and the absurdities of childhood and adulthood. And it had to be big because it was in front of Rupert, who has literally interrupted her mid-speech before, stealing all the thunder for himself. I really appreciated that Rupert becomes human before our very eyes, and that Rebecca is able to genuinely draw from the things that made her love him in the first place, while there is nothing unclear about how bleak and miserable and awful Rupert is. He fucking tries to kiss her after the cathartic moment with the speech and the food tantrum, and her rejection is so clear and strong. I can’t think of a better way to almost purely visually illustrate (although the words are important, Rebecca's face says it all) what it means for her to be free of the hold he had over her for so many years.

I am soooo excited that we (re)met Roy’s sister and she really is that doctor from the A&E and she’s awesome and clearly a very good and fun mom and she’s having such a good time teasing Roy out of love which is basically the adult version of the incredibly important role Phoebe plays in his life. Also, Elodie Blomfield is so good as Phoebe. The moment when she figures out the “Roy Kunt” kit is so great. And everything about Jamie being there and his familiarity with the family!?! 

Roy and Keeley! Roy’s tiny terrible handwriting! I like that we didn’t get the big moment of Roy and Keeley kissing and reconnecting to each other, and I also like that we didn’t get the moment of Nate resigning from his job. In both stories, we got the most important gestures, the most important decisions that led up to these moments and came after these moments, and considering the show needed to go big for Rebecca’s speech I think it’s essential to have a little restraint elsewhere.

Barbara! Everything with the snow globe reimbursements! Ahhhhhhhh! Barbara is the coolest and I would pay the big bucks to hear Katy Wix talk (in a good thoughtful environment obviously) about her autism and her acting choices when playing Barbara because her timings are so incredible and so hilarious and she’s built a side character into someone who fully enriches the overall story and I assume it’s all connected but I’d love to hear about this role straight from the source. I was already such a Katy Wix fan from Taskmaster and reading some of her writing online, and she was just perfection in this episode. 

Beard. Oh God. Beard. What are you doing. His grudge against Nate and the kind of willful immaturity of his character in this stage of his relationship with Jane. Other than the day out with Henry in 3x8, when is the last time Beard was critical and compassionate with anyone in his life? Ted looks so bummed about that axe-throwing offer. I think Beard had to know deep down that Ted and Roy were never in a million years going to be saying yes to this invitation; it’s not that Jane would want them there. I think 3x11 and 3x12 are going to have a lot of Ted-and-Beard by necessity and I’m basically on pins and needles.

I am nervous about many things for the rest of this season, not because I think they’ll be handled badly in the show but because I can see so many different possibilities (for the truth bomb, for all the moms, for what Rebecca understands about her life today and what it could be, same for Ted, same for Beard, because I feel like Ted has to leave in some way but something’s telling me it’s not as simple as leaving or not leaving) and it’s making me feel insane. But 3x10 was a wonderful time and the lavender sprig and the spitting hit that perfect sweet spot of callbacks that propel the narrative forward and I’m grateful to have had it. 

[wildflower-otome]

Finally finished the Virche FD a few days ago and just wanted to write down a few thoughts/mini-review on it. Vague spoilers only below.

Started off by playing through the short story section of which there are about 8 pages or so of. There were lots of fun fluffy ones (I especially enjoyed the ones that are just the guys talking at Adolphe’s place), ones that fill in gaps or are POV stories of side characters, there are a LOT of CG’s in this section. There’s even stories that are after stories of the side bad ends from the OG game too for all the bad end lovers. Overall thought it was an interesting range of cute stories to some rather disturbing/dark ones.

Did the encore section next, which are basically alternate routes that start from a certain point in the original game and end the story in a completely different way. I do rather have mixed thoughts on the encores. Played Lucas’s first since he was my first route in the first game too and after playing all of them definitely feel his was the best one of the lot. Although it was still bittersweet, there were still a lot of good moments and parts where I cheered because they overturned some of the more awful things to happen in the OG route.

Aside from Lucas, also really enjoyed Yves’ route too, although I wouldn’t say it’s necessarily a ‘happier’ version of the OG either it still had some great scenes. Mixed thoughts on Scien’s route, I think people that are interested in a mad scientist Scien might like it but unfortunately it wasn’t really for me. I thought the main end was kind of cute but the bad endings really broke Scien’s image to me and I ended up really disliking him. Mathis’ route as a whole had me reeling and I actually had to take a break and play something else for a while. Truly the epitome of And It Got Worse. For Adolphe, I feel like he already had a good end in the first game, so unfortunately his encore was kind of mediocre in comparison.

The after salvation ends for the most part did not disappoint, with one exception I was really happy with all of them. Some nice romantic CG’s and moments, and also a tying up of loose plot ends from the original game. I also really liked how characters got new sprite outfits which was fun. Those after despair ends though…Yves and Mathis’s in particular were pretty disturbing imo. I actually thought Adolphe had the most interesting despair after end, definitely did a great job of portraying true never-ending despair.

The Drifter route was an enjoyable side story and also kind of functions as an origin story for Ankou as well which makes sense as it needs to be played before unlocking Ankou’s route. His and Ankou’s interactions and friendship was a lot of fun to watch and the ending was pretty touching too.

And last of all, just have to gush about Ankou’s route. Absolutely one of the best routes I’ve played in any otome game so far and will probably remain so. Especially after playing through some of the  more gruelling routes in the FD, it was a really enjoyable experience. I think there’s also just something so cathartic about seeing the series’ most long-suffering character finally get the happiness he deserves. Ankou and Ceres at the beginning are two people that don’t really see the value in their own lives, and to see that slowly start to change as their relationship develops and they meet other people on their journey was really heartwarming. I teared up a lot at the explanation of the game title “Epic Lycoris” in the epilogue too, just a really special and amazing route to cap off the series.

Overall, Ankou’s route aside, I will say that people that are expecting lots of fluff or a fix it fic type of thing for the original routes because it’s an FD will probably end up disappointed. It is a fan disc but it’s also very much still Virche so I would say to temper your expectations and you’ll probably end up with much more than you think. Definitely been a wild ride at times and while some parts were hard to get through, am really sad to say goodbye to the characters.  All in all, well worth a playthrough if you enjoyed the original game.

[emanation-aura]

ask game!

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end.

25. What is a weird, hyper-specific detail you know about one of your characters that is completely irrelevant to the story?

28. Who is the most delightful character you’ve ever written? Why?

This is a response to this post about questions for writers!

7. deepest joy about writing?

Definitely the feeling. The emotion and being cathartic. Writing has been and probably will always be an outlet for me; I love pouring emotion onto the page and receiving comments from people who say same, yes, I felt the same way. Not as eloquently as that, usually, but I take great pride in making my work feel alive, and having others feel something from my work— it makes me even more honoured/excited when what a reader takes from the fic is different to what I wrote into it.

10. has a piece of writing "haunted" me, my own or otherwise? what does that mean?

I talked about it in another answer to this ask game, but these two fics [Only Human, Attack on Titan (tw graphic self-harm) and The Shape of Grief, Maze Runner (tw grief, suicide, psychological torture)] were absolutely fundamental to me. They haunted, and continue to haunt me to this day. I can't place exactly why, although I imagine the heavy themes have something to do with it, but. The slow, agonising prose of The Shape of Grief inspired how I write about emotion today. Only Human told me something about tenderness and care that I keep expressing in my works.

I guess they not so much haunt as keep me company. I don't consciously think about them all the time, but they left something indelible in me that will never go away; and in turn, I let pieces of them "haunt" my own writing, too.

18. Choose a passage from my work, and explain it— backstory, details, how it was written start to finish.

(Genshin Impact fic below! If you're not into Genshin this may not make much sense.)

A flash of lightning from the corresponding i, splitting apart the twisting lines that make up the letter s, a green serpent that writhes in uncomfortably lifelike agony. Swiftly transforming the a into a large valley, the n from nisut crash-lands from the sky, bending and twisting until it is a ruler rising from his throne, sands pouring from his hand. With one swipe of the simplistic brown line, the u rises up as a grand palace door in front, and behind it rises a seemingly endless series of pillars— the slideshow pauses, then, and the letter-characters recombine to brand this grand structure Khaj-Nisut.

This is part of Cyno/Staff of Scarlet Sands section for A Blade Against the World, a work of mine exploring the thematic elements of characters and their "signature" weapons. (I'll very behind because Tighnari/Hunter's Path threw me into writer's block. I've started on Tighnari & Cyno, and have vague plans for Alhaitham, Wanderer, and Dehya.)

Anyway, this passage makes reference to the Deshret script seen all across the desert. Like Egyptian hieroglyphics, they're pictographic—each letter represents a concept. Cyno is currently in King Deshret's Mausoleum trying to decide beween the Key of Khaj-Nisut and Staff of Scarlet Sands, and this pictographic display is done by the characters that compose Khaj-Nisut.

The slideshow represents the history of the Great Red Sand: the lightning splitting apart the serpent is The Usurper/Primordial One vanquishing the seven Dragon Sovereigns, specifically Apep. The n crashlanding into a valley and rising to become a ruler with sand pouring from his hand references Deshret's descension: he was once a "son of the sky" (according to the chinese version of The Lay of Al-Ahmar) who was exiled to Teyvat and became a God-King. The n from the Deshret Script is fitting here because it is Sacred Seal: Right to Rule, a "spitting image of a ruler seated upon a throne". Finally, the u (Sacred Seal: Grand Door: "silhouetted shape of a stone door from an ancient palace") represents the rise of Khaj-Nisut as a city-state.

25. Weird, hyper-specific yet irrelevant detail you know about one of your characters?

Hmm... let me give an answer for both the fandoms I actively write for now.

Genshin: In Structural Isomerism, where mad scientist Sucrose accidentally reverse-engineers the element of Time via Anemo, I imagine that Lisa (who doesn't even appear in the fic!) ends up actually going into retirement, even quitting as a librarian, because of the stress that the aftermath of this incident causes (she probably has to clean up and figure out who the hell showed up and turned Albedo back into chalk).

Persona 5: Whenever I write, I keep in mind that Akechi actually is slightly envious of Sumire's gymnastic ability, even though he's disgusted by the way she was brainwashed by Maruki and so weak-willed. He justifies it as he wants flexibility and skill for Metaverse killing, but actually it makes something deep inside hurt to see someone wholeheartedly devoted to a single, transcendental dream against all odds. This has never come up in any fic I write, though, and the sole thing this idea does it affect how I characterise Goro talking with Sumire.

28. Most delightful character you’ve ever written and why?

(Persona 5)

Goro Akechi, without a single doubt. My Joker Palace fic(s) are set from his perspective most of the time (because Akira is indisposed by the cognitive hell of hating himself so much that he has a Palace :P), and he is truly delightful to explore.

Goro is violent and standoffish and cold, but he also cares (for Akira) in ways that make little sense to even himself. He is a living contradiction, acting and justifying his own actions in a way that suggests neither outright guilt/remorse nor total callous disregard. He isn't exactly at peace with his spotty past with serial killing and working for Shido, but he's also accepted every aspect of himself and won't hide behind another Detective Prince mask again out of a desire to be liked or respected. He will forge ahead in the world on his own terms, knowing that his past may permanently stain him but at least it is part of the true him, no matter what (especially poignant with Maruki arc). I've had so much fun with the violent swear-y inner monologue, balanced with moments of painful self-reflection about the nature of his and Akira's relationship. He is simultaneously very self-aware and also very oblivious about aspects of himself and others, and I think that it's a challenging but fun balancing act.

Example of a moment I enjoyed writing very much:

“Are you going to fight me?” Goro asks impatiently, done with this farce of Akira, the impostor wearing his face in a heart of distorted lies. “Or are you going to disarm me again and again, ever since you let me in here?” Because Akira— Cognitive Akira— has done nothing but surrender his heart to Goro over and over again. It’s just a tad insulting when Goro is his former assassin and serial killer, being allowed to walk all over his heart’s defenses without even a will of rebellion to keep him out. (Where is Akira’s Persona, anyway?)

[celestie0]

IT’S CELESTIEFAN3000 i have to say i like tumblr way more than ao3 so i’ll be using this to comment from now on 😋 But i would like to personally thank you for writing chapter 9, your author voice is genuinely so appealing and HONESTLY you could pass off as a literal professional author if I didn’t know this was fanfiction!

Now for the uglier feelings: (please ignore typos or other mistakes i wrote a lot. I am very normal about kickoff, obviously)

I SOBBED LIKE A BABY MIDWAY AND BECAME A CRYING SOUND EFFECT AT THE END OK OK OKAYYYYYYY 😭😭💫💫 I’m still dizzy and lightheaded from the effect ur writing gives me (THIS IS A GOOD THING) it’s so addicting i need more😭‼️ UGHHHH the way you build that exact RIGHT amount of comfort to compensate for the suffering you’ve but us through but still managed to EDGE US AT THE END . I WISH YOU WEREN’T SO GOOD AT THIS FANFICTION THING, BECAUSE DAMN! 😭😭😭😭

The scenes were so fucking beautiful, I love the peaceful atmosphere that rain gives and how you were able to contrast that as an escape from that horrible loud and noisy bar to just a horrible man!!!!! You really know how to direct scenes and i can not express in words how much they mean to me 🥹🥹😭😭😭

I feel like I’ve overused the crying face emoji too much in my ask BUT I ACTUALLY MEAN IT HERE EVERY TIME I can fill an entire glass up of my tears that kickoff caused me to shed alone 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Everything was just great vegetables, this chapter will definitely be haunting me while I sleep but it ended with an amazing scenario to build off of and dream about RIGHT?☺️ Anyway, my last words here are that I admire how you’ve been working on this project for around a couple months now nonstop, but the quality has not dropped and has instead improved despite it getting really tiring the more you carry on with it! Maybe that’s just how I feel about finishing what I’ve started LMAO but it’s so impressive every time I see someone able to pull that off, I’ve seen some fics succumb to the tragedy of “i-just-want-to-get-this-over-with-because-the-concept-no-longer-interests-me-anymore”-ness 😔 BUT WITH KICKOFF! I’m so happy that the author is as passionate about the characters and plot in their fanfiction as I am, and hard work really does pay off! (for the reader, hard work is waiting 3 weeks for a new fic— but the read’s always better the longer you wait 😉)

My ADHD really came out here I deeply apologize but my ACTUAL final words are: I wish I had a bf like gojo, Oh My God You Are A Legend Ellie, You are most deserving person of meeting Gojo Satoru FIRST if he ever comes to life, it is 1am haha so i’m sleeping now ☺️🤍 Celestiefan300 out!

MY SWEET ANGEL BB CELESTIEFAN3000 😭🫶🏼💕💕 HI DEAR

UMM CAN I JUST SAY IM AB TO SOB ALR JUST FROM HOW LONG THIS ASK IS ??? PLS FORGIVE MY URGE TO RESPOND TO EVERY ASPECT OF IT

thank you sm for the compliments on the writinf omg i rly feel comin into my own now n finding my voice as i continue to write more so seeing u say that esp as a long term reader is just ssooo dhddldfk 🥺💕 brb gonna cry

PLS IM SO SORRY FOR THE SAD EMOTIONSS aaa yes the baby steps to build their relationship has been……baby stepping indeed LOL but it was so nice to write the scene at rhe end where gojo comforts her 😭💕 so excited to write lovey dovey gojo now

OMG STOPPP w the nice words i will literally eat u for breakfast🧍🏻‍♀️the contrast w the soothing rain & hectic bar scene 😭 u pointing that out just made me soooo freaking happyy and wahh im so glad the scenes resonate w you :””) <33

ME TOO I FEEL IM HOLDING BACK ALL THE 😭😭😭 WMOJIS I COULD USE READING THIS ASK

awhh thanks darling im so happy kickoff has ur continued interest and AW to hear its improving means sm to me 🥺💕 im so passionate ab it, it has been so cathartic to write, and although its also hard to write sometimes bc of the personal aspects, it’s so joyous to me and i look forward to seeing it thru to the end w the same amt of passion. HAHAHA its hard work to read tho damn 😮‍💨 ur not wrong!! and also yes i too will be daydreaming of what happens next 🤣

my final words: i love u sm, YOU deserve a satoru (but i will gladly have him too if u say so🙈), so blessed to have u as a reader, and please get some good sleep my love <33

eeeeeee 🫶🏼💕