#also... and get ready because is this possibly the most shocking part... it can be read as /p desert duo

[rosaacicularis]

new 1k oneshot soon.... probably

[rebelssvy]

obsessed part two

bokuto x reader

(afab. this is the most comfortable i write in. i try my best to make it as gender neutral as possible and not give any description of the reader. lmk how i can do betterrrrrr)

- authors note: you guys really liked part one. so abt to write a SINFUL part two ☺️☺️☺️

part one -link here!

LABELS: smut omg smut. i’ve never written anything smut so don’t judge pls 😩😩contains, making out, oral sex, sex.

walking to school the next day was a pain. bokutos mind was filled with the guilt of what had happened last night.

he jerked off to the girl in his class, who he still has yet to talk to.

ashamed was an understatement. he was embarrassed and felt inhumane. it was even worse because the problem still hadn’t gone away. he still thought of you in the worst ways. he couldn’t help himself.

closing the distance between him and his class room, his eyes narrowed in on you. the guilt was overwhelming. but you looked so cute in your uniform.

entering the classroom he groaned to himself. sitting down at his assigned desk, putting his hands over his face to try to hide his frustration.

he just liked you so much that it was truly embarrassing. he was bokuto koutarou! one of the top aces in high school volleyball. no girl should have his attention like this.

i am not a man, he thought to himself, hands still covering his face.

“ahem…” he looked up at the person trying to get his attention.

to his absolute shock, you were standing right infront of his desk.

“hi…” you said to him waiting for a response…. the response never came as bokuto just looked up at you mouth agape.

“i didn’t know you were so shy!haha” you try playing off to make it less awkward. his silence seemed to be maybe a message for you to just walk away. and yet you stayed begging for his presence.

“well i’m yn, and i didn’t know if you noticed but we have a partner project in this class…. and we were paired up yesterday…. and before i could figure out a plan with you, you walked out of class before i could talk to you yesterday.” you felt yourself ramble on for what seemed like far to long. his silence was draining.

from what you heard from most people, your schools ace was a huge standout. most calling him extroverted, crazy and annoying.

but right now he sat infront of you saying not a word.

finally he spoke up “oh..” he said. that’s literally all he said.

you stayed for a little longer, watching his face grow into a friendly smile.

“it’s nice to meet you yn! i’m so sorry i didn’t even realize we had an assignment together!! HAHA well don’t worry we can get it figured out. also sorry about yesterday i just rushed off to practice without a second thought” bokutos voice boomed throughout the class room.

you let out a sigh of relief. maybe he was just waking up still? but he sure does seem awake now..

“we can only work on the assignment out side of the school hours…. if your comfortable with it you can come over to my house tonight and we can work on it.” you say smiling down at him.

bokutos prayers have been answered. everything he has ever worked for is being rewarded back to him now.

“yes.!” bokuto replied without hesitation. smile still beaming up at her.

“here’s my number, text me after this class gets out.” you say to him. stealing his phone and saving your contact in his phone. you were a little forward. bokuto was practically gushing.

with that you walked back to your desk and started talking with your friends.

bokuto was so happy he could scream.

the day went on, after you two had agreed on a set time for him to arrive at your house he was counting down the minutes.

he would have to come over after he practiced, meaning he would also have to go home to shower before hand.

it gave you more time to get ready before he made it to your house.

secretly, you had been honing a crush on bokuto for awhile now. when your teacher announced that you two would be in a group together you were thrilled. but when you looked over to bokuto, he seemed… upset.

his face was hard to read. it was a mix of tired, guilt, and anger. you chose to not introduce yourself to him until class was out, not wanting to make a fool of yourself. but before you could he had already left.

that’s why you were so nervous. he was so big, not just tall. that man was beefy. in all the right ways. and you couldn’t even tell if he liked you at all.

of course you would glance at him time to time in class, even showing up to some of his games in previous years. you noticed him.

analyzing yourself in your mirror. checking the time ever so often.

you had taken a shower, got out of the shower and did all your duties to look the best you could. sporting yourself in a way you were most confident.

also going to the measure of cleaning your room. everything had to be perfect.

before you new it your doorbell rang. you rushed to the door, opening to a freshly washed bokuto.

he had on grey sweats and a black hoodie. his hair was still a little damp from his shower, so it wasn’t spiked up in its usual manner. his bangs clung to his forehead.

“heeeLLO” he said to you voice getting a little louder as his word continued.

“hi” you said to him while still looking him up and down. it was a little obvious you were checking him out.

you quickly let him in and gave him a tour of your home. making a mental note to leave your bedroom for last. making a b- line for your kitchen you offered him somthing to drink.

his presence alone was enough. he was just soo huge. you felt his gaze after every corner you took.

“uh yes water is fine.” he said, way more calm.

you got him a glass and sat on your counter top. he was infront of you leaning his back on your cabinet.

as he drank he held a comfortable eye contact with you.

“how was practice?” you spoke up.

he reached forward and put his glass next to you, then leaned back to his formal position.

“i did way better then i did yesterday i can say that much.” he said with a chuckle. his voice was low. deep.

“what happened yesterday?” you asked.

he seemed a little taken back from your question. but it was only a second of that expression that was followed with a smile.

“oh i just didn’t do my best. my teammates say i get in my own head sometimes but even my worst is not that bad soo” he said with a low chuckle again. his grin never really left his face.

he was confident in himself that was forsure. you thought you should atleast see where you stand with him. gathering up all the confidence you had to flirt with him just a tinyyy bit.

“oh so you must be gooood.” you say leaning forward a little, still perched on your counter top. you made sure you arch your back a little, even though he couldn’t see it from where he was sitting. you applied the action anyways.

bokutos ears perked up a little. he sure did love flattery.

“i mean, yeah. i’m pretty good.” he said non chalantly. leaning forward a little more as well.

“tell me bokuto, how good are you?” you asked. leaning just as much as you could without falling off the counter top.

“oh i’m pretty good. but i can’t tell you how good i am… it’s something you have to experience yourself.” he said, smug. grin still on his face.

as he spoke he had stopped leaning against your counter top.

he got closer to you, your heart beat picked up. he then picked up his hand, reaching out.

just as you thought he was going to touch you, he picked up his glass beside you. blushing your thigh in the action.

he picked up his glass and finished the rest of his water with a gulp.

smug bastard. you thought to yourself.

you then got back onto your feet and started walking out of the kitchen. bokuto taking that as his note to follow behind you.

you silently led him to your room. anticipating whatever came next.

as you waked bokuto stared. he stared at your ass, your hips, your waist. anything he could look at he took a mental picture of.

this could be the only time he was this close to you. he thought.

opening the door to your room you, you showed him around.

“you can sit anywhere your comfortable with, but i did get an extra chair for you at my desk.” you say to him. going and taking a seat next to the school work you had already laid out.

bokuto was taking in everything. your posters, your decorations, anything you had in their he was saving in a file in his brain.

he finally sat down next to you.

you started going over the project, he would follow your words with some “hmm” or “ook” but overall he didn’t seem very into it.

all bokuto could think about is you stuffed full of his cock. really it was a shame. you were talking to him and that’s all he could think about. he watched your lips as they instructed him. that’s all he really watched.

“bokuto.” you said in a firm voice.

“are you even listening?” you said to him slightly annoyed.

“uhh yea…” he replied guilt sinking in once again.

he was evil. he wanted you. he felt as if you had just teased him in the kitchen too. he wanted to get you back. bad.

he licked his lips. confidence surging through him for a second. he opened his mouth to say somthing.

but the words never came. blush flooded his face. you probably think he’s stupid at this point.

“you are so pretty.” he said quickly. it came out of nowhere. he didn’t even mean to say it. he was so embarrassed!

but there was no way you were gonna know how embarrassed he is. no, bokuto koutaro never gets embarrassed!

you stare back at him. confused. but to all honestly. you were aching for him. his frame so close to yours, made you painfully aware of how big he was.

and he just called you pretty. what even in your next move! what are you supposed to say to that!

“y/n…” he said quietly. it was soft. he had gotten closer to you then you realized. you could feel his breath on your lips.

“bokuto…” you whispered back to him. the distance was painful.

before you could register he had his lips on yours. closing the gap. you locked your lips with his. it was just a quick kiss. romantic if anything.

you two pulled away. staring him in the eyes, there was a hunger.

“i need more” he said before grabbing you cheeks and closing the distance again. you were shocked. this must be a dream.

your hands found his body. scooting as close as you could without falling off your chair. one of your hands found his bicep. the other on his shoulder.

the kisses grew hungrier. his pace picked up. you gasped when his hand found your thigh. it was a comfortable position.

he took this chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. you purrred against him.

your touches grew with sexual tension. you parted for a second to catch your breath. a line of saliva connecting you two.

“c’mere” he said scooting his chair back alittle. signaling you to get out of your chair.

you stood up waiting further instruction.

he reached up and grabbed your hips pulling you closer to him. he was still seated, legs apart.

you felt like you were on fire. his eyes took in all off you. his hands rubbed your hips. even going a little farther to pinch at the fat of your ass.

“wanna sit on my lap?” he said tilting his head to the side. you shook your head and slowly made your way to his lap. you were positioned so you could face him.

his hands cradled you, finding your curves.

“you think i’m pretty?” you said to him bringing your hands to his jaw.

“you have no idea.” he breathed out.

finding his lips again except the tension in the room was now thick. you were growing a pool in your panties. every touch of his fingers was doing numbers to your core.

without knowing it you slowly started to grind yourself against him. you only noticed when you felt bokuto grow underneath you. his hands moved to your ass. grabbing at it.

then his hands slowly fell even farther. coming concerningly close to your core.

“y/n…. can i…?” he parted quickly. out of breath begging you for more.

“yes bokuto.” you moaned out to him. still grinding your hips against him.

“do whatever you want” you moaned out throwing your head back. you were growing needy.

without any words bokuto grabbed you and picked you up. putting you down on the bed.

your back was on the bed with your legs folded to your chest. he had ahold of your shins.

he was standing above you grinning like a kid in a candy shop.

“i’ve been waiting for this.” he stated.

his fingers graced over your core, you sucked in breath.

“you have?” you whimpered out.

“i have liked you for quite sometime. i have even dreamt of doing somthing like this too you. y/n… you have no idea.” he said while taking off your pants. you were left in only your underwear. then he started working on your shirt, pulling it off over your head.

now being left only in your bra you felt very conscious of everything.

“fuck…” he said to himself seeing you drenched through your panties. this was truly his dream.

“can i?” he said before continuing.

you shook your head yes.

he touched your clothed core with a certain grace. seeming like he was afraid to hurt you. you moaned out at his touch.

your ass was almost off the bed when he slowly came to the ground squatting on two knees.

you soon realized what he wanted to do.

“bo… you don’t have too” you said painfully, when al you really wanted was his tongue on your cunt.

“i want to.” he said before stuffing his face into your core.

you still had your panties on but the friction was just too much. you moaned out back arching for him.

he was hooked. he circled anything he could with his tongue, even taking breaks to kiss your stomach. he finally took your underwear off.

staring at your naked core he was in love. he wanted to be the only man to ever see you like this.

experimentally he blew on it, seeing your body react and you moan out. he loved his life.

diving back into you he licked all of you. slurping up your juices, sucking at your clit. taking every angle he could to make you feel good.

“more…” you whimpered out.

he brought his fingers up to your hole without warning. he played with our rimming a finger around your clenched spot. sticking it in you he stucked on your clit simultaneously.

you moaned out. it was really too much. your core was building up at a fast rate as his finger pumped in and out of you.

he stoped and stood infront of you again. you looked up at him wondering why he had to hault your pleasure.

he took off his hoodie and sweats leaving himself in just his boxers.

and oh. my. god. he was wonderful. he was everything you could ever dream.

“bokuto… i need you.” you told him.

he was on fire right now. you were sprawled out on the bed, cunt for his to see.

“fuck… you drive me insane.” he said pulling his boxers down to free his length.

“oh my god” you moaned out. it was huge. there was no way that was going to inside you. his one finger did the job, so what is that thing even going to do to you.

“cmon baby you can take me.” he said lying down next to you on the bed. you crouch up on your knees.

“ride me.” he demanded.

you positioned yourself on top of him. grabbing at his his abs as you mentally prepped yourself for what was gonna be inside you.

slowly you reach down for his cock. he had already been stroking it.

you touch it and he lets in a sharp gasp of air. you give it a good couple pumps

“hah” he moaned out. you had kept eye contact the hold time you entered him in you.

lowering yourself as best you can. his face was of euphoria.

“bokuto… your tooooo big hah” you moaned out to him.

“call me koutarou” he gasped out.

you found the strength to get him in you. bottoming out you clenched around him.

“fuuuck kou” you moaned out. you started grinding yourself against him.

it was the best pain you had ever felt.

“your beautiful. oh my god.” he said as his hands found your boobs.

pulling your bra down and bringing his lips to your hardened nipples.

your back arched for him. you moaned out louder and louder.

bouncing against him. this was all he ever wanted. he was in heaven.

you felt that familiar coil in your core tighten up again.

and bokuto could tell. he felt your walls clench around him as your threw your head back.

before he could think about it he changed positions. throwing you on your back and into a missionary position.

he took it to himself to start pounding into you.

“kou… nnnits too muchhch” you moaned out. it was almost hard to hear because of the sound your pussy was making.

“cmon. you can take it” he grunted out, slamming himself into you.

you moaned more. eye contact the whole time he fucked you.

the way you clenched around him was almost painful. but he could tell you were close.

he brought his fingers to your sensitive bud.

“cum for me. come on baby you can do it.” he grunted.

“come on my cock.” he grunted even more.

you were so close.

“your mine, understand?”

that sent you have the edge. you clamped around him spasmsing through your orgasm.

bokuto barely pulled out in time to cum on your stomach.

“i’m yours im yours im yours…” you babbled off to yourself.

fuck.

you were both drained.

who ever thought this is where you would be.

he got up to get a tissue for you to wipe you off. then coming over to press a kiss to your forehead.

“i’ll be right back” he said he before he left.

he came back with some water and helped you up.

“what’s going on?” you asked still faint from your orgasm.

“i started a shower for us!” he beamed at you.

yep. he could definitely be the one for you.

………………………………………………………………………………….

- WOWWWWW WHAT DID I JUST WRITE! this is my longest and still some of my first works i’ve put out. well i hope you like it also. comment any ideas you guys have for me!

[gracie-eilish]

Take me out, and take me home…

an: this is kinda long!! but here is my official fic based on Lover by Taylor Swift:) any blue text is Billie’s dialogue and any pink is readers. I hope you enjoy this one!! seven and Guilty as Sin are both coming soon. Peachy (pt. 2) is also going to be on the way! i wasn’t originally expecting you guys to want a part two so i’ll get writing!! 🥰✨🍑

warnings: intoxication mentioned, slight nudity but no smut, so much fucking fluff it’s like a unicorn threw up cotton candy in here.

alsoooo thank you also for over a hundred followers! that’s so many beautiful besties!! i’ve loved writing about billie and chatting with so many of you over the last few weeks and i can’t wait for more!! love ya💋

🩷🥂🫧💋✨

“Take me homeeeee” You slurred, stumbling out of the party you and Billie had just attended. Billie had an arm slung around your waist while you had an arm around her shoulders.

“We’re going home baby, I promise,” Billie replied with a giggle at your disheveled state. Even drunk as can be, she found you so beautiful. Your rosy cheeks even rosier, your big wide eyes now hooded and hazy and full of love, and the sleepy smile plastered on your face made her just wanna kiss it right off of you.

“Heyy babyyyyy? I have.. a very important question for… you.” You looked back up at her stoically, booping her nose as you said “you.” Billie planted a kiss to your temple to try to hide her giggle.

“What baby?” She quickly bent down to grab your waist again as you stumbled backward, making you burst into the most melodic sounding giggles.

“I’m your baby right?” This sent Billie into a laughing fit. The attempt at a serious look on your face combined with the cutest little question, she couldn’t help it.

She pressed kisses to your cheek and temple in between declarations, “My baby, *kiss* my princess, *kiss* my girl, *kiss* my angel, *kiss* my magical unicorn angel baby princess,” she added the last one with a giggle. That was your little nickname for anyone in your life who meant something to you. Your best friends, Billie of course, your little cat. And it never failed to make Billie laugh when she heard it.

“Why do you ask my love?” She questioned after your giggles calmed down again.

“Because I’m like… soooo many things right? But I don’t have a thing for you, you know? Like I need a thing for you. And I was thinking so hard in my brain tonight and I think I figured it out.” You stated matter of factly.

Billie just nodded for you to continue, holding you up a little tighter, and pushing some hair out of your face.

“You, Billie girl, are my-“ You got cut off by Billie’s phone dinging, signaling her driver was here. Without rudely interrupting you, Billie carefully walked you both over to the car, and carefully guided you into the back seat before scooching in herself.

“You warm and cozy mama?” Billie asked, fiddling with the heater in the back, kissing your forehead after you nodded in confirmation.

The ride back home was quiet, a stark contrast to the buzz of the club you two were just in, as well as to your own drunk ramblings. Some people liked to run when drunk, others call exes, and others just fall asleep. Not you. You were always a bundle of energy, ready to chit chat with anyone who would listen, and Billie found it adorable, never once silencing your tipsy rambles even as you both tried to fall asleep at 4am.

“Billie?”

“Yeah baby?”

“I feel like… I feel like I’ve known you for like.. twenty years. But also that’s like not possible. I’ve only known you for real, for like twenty seconds.”

Billie chuckled at your statement. Another little thing you did after drinking, was greatly exaggerate time. For example, if it was the middle of November and someone complained about you still having Halloween decorations up, you’d gasp in shock saying Halloween was “literally like 20 minutes ago.” You two had been dating for about three years now, so Billie just chuckled understanding twenty seconds was three years in your own little drunken time zone tonight.

“Twenty years is a long time baby,” she replied softly, pulling you in closer to her side, letting you rest your head on her shoulder.

“It’s like such a long time. *sigh* Can we still be this close in twenty years?”

This sent both of you into giggles. Billie couldn’t help herself anymore, smothering you in kisses, each one accompanied by a little “mwah!”

“Baby once I get a ring on that finger, we will be this close for a lot longer than twenty years hun.” She pushed some hair behind your ear, watching your cheeky flush under her gaze.

“For ever and ever, you’re my-“

Your conversation faltered again as you pulled up in front of your place. Billie thanked the driver and helped you out of the car before guiding you up to your apartment. Not without few stumbles and bumps along the way.

You were starting to feel a little sleepy but Billie knew you’d get a second wind once you got inside, but she still got butterflies when she felt you wrap your arms around her from behind and rest your cheek on her shoulder as she unlocked the door.

Billie almost jumped out of her skin as you gasped dramatically at something, scaring the shit out of her.

“Baby!” You had your hands on your cheeks in shock, looking back at her as she locked the door behind her.

“We left the Christmas lights up!” You paused before turning back to face the lights. “Until January!”

“Is that a bad thing?” Billie was so confused but went along with it.

“Isn’t that like… against the rules? Christmas was like a million days ago!”

“This is our place, we make the rules.” Your eyes shined up at Billie like she just revealed the meaning to life.

“Oh. My. God. You’re so fucking right babe.”

Billie chuckled and kissed your temple before guiding you to the kitchen and sitting you down on a stool as she got you some water and a small snack.

“Drink up lovie, I don’t want your pretty little head hurting tomorrow.”

As you sipped your water and nibbled on some snacks Billie went into your shared bedroom to get you some pjs and start the shower.

Billie ran her hand under the water to check the temperature before stopping, hearing such a sound come from the kitchen. She dried off her hand before tip toeing back to the kitchen to find the source of the.. sound? song? cry?

“You’re my my my myyyyyyyyyy,” it was you. And your second wind Billie had predicted. You were spinning around on stool singing.. well singing something, only stopping when you caught sight of Billie.

“Babyyyyyy!!! You came back!” You cried out with a huge smile and your hands out, wiggling your fingers as if it would magically will her closer to you. And to your knowledge, it did magically will her closer as she wrapped her own arms around you, kissing the top of your head a few times, chuckling softly.

“I finished my snack and my water. I’m so good at that.” Billie chuckled and simply placed her forehead onto the top of your head.

“You’re killing me here babe.” She said, lifting her head back up and pushing the hair out of your face. You just shrugged nonchalantly before puckering your lips dramatically. Billie smiled adoringly before leaning in and giving you a soft almost angelic kiss, squishing your cheeks a bit too.

“Alright tipsy girl, you wanna go shower and get comfy?” She said holding your shoulders while you nodded. She could tell you were starting to get sleepy, but she knows you’d be grumpy in the morning if you hadn’t showered and you were hungover.

As she guided you into the bathroom, you were humming that little song again, Billie has never heard it before.

“That’s a pretty song your singing there lovie.” She said, helping you out of your clothes.

“Thank you. I’m writing it myself. Right now.”

“Oh really? You wanna sing some more of it for me?”

“Mmm maybe when I’m in the shower. I need to write more words first.” Billie nodded, holding back a laugh.

“Of course, of course. How could I rush such art?” She replied. “Do you want me to come in with you? Need help?”

You gasped and softly nudged her shoulder, “Billie! That’s dirty!” Billie kissed your cheek softly, a mischievous glint in her eye.

“Baby it’s not dirty. We had sex in there this morning.” Your jaw dropped and face flushed at Billie’s statement. Your drunk brain not seeming to remember that right now.

“Oh my gosh Billie. You have to promise not to say things like that in front of other people.” You drunkenly pleaded, face totally flushed.

“I promise mama. I save my dirty jokes only for you.” She said with a wink, making you sigh in relief.

“Oh thank god.” Eventually you did in fact pull Billie in there with you. You claimed you didn’t need any help, but you couldn’t deny Billie’s fingers massaging the shampoo into your scalp was heavenly. The rose smell of your shampoo mixed with Billie’s woodsy vanilla body wash she used on you wrapped around you almost as tight as Billie’s arms, making your eyes droopy as you rested your head in the crook of her neck, leaning back into her and she pressed tiny kisses to your own shoulder. Her hands slowly roaming around your body, over your stomach, up to your boobs, a squeeze to your hips, a couple more squeezes on your shoulders and back to your stomach where her arms wrapped tightly, and contentedly.

“You ready for bed angel?” She whispered into your ear, hands giving your hips another squeeze. You just nodded sleepily turning around in her arms to give her a proper hug.

“Thank you by the way,” Your words a bit more steady now as you slowly sobered up.

“For what baby?”

“For saving me a seat at the table tonight. Since I got stuck in traffic. I was nervous everyone else would wanna sit next to you,” You said it so small and sweetly that Billie felt her heart grow ten sizes, knowing that at every table, she’d save you a seat for the rest of her life.

“Oh babygirl,” she cooed, cradling your head closer into her as she hugged you tighter.

She gave you one last kiss to the top of your head before shutting off the water. She stepped out and grabbed your towels out of the little towel warmer and wrapped herself in one quickly, before heading back to you. She shut the shower door again to keep the warm air in as she carefully dried you off a bit before wrapping you in the fluffy towel, with a kiss to your nose.

A comfortable silence filled the room as the two of you got ready for bed. Well really, Billie got ready for bed and then helped you do the same thing. You giggled at her focused face as she carefully dabbed moisturizer to your skin, only silencing your giggles with a kiss making both of you smile.

She had her own giggles watching your droopy eyes fight to stay open as Billie dried your hair with a towel. You absolutely melted into a puddle anytime Billie had her fingers in your hair, so her fingers mixed with a warm fluffy towel was sending you to dreamland.

When she finished, Billie helped you off the counter and gave your butt a little pat as she guided you back to your connected bedroom, shutting off the bathroom light. The two of you changed into some pjs, Billie giggled while helping you with the buttons after you whined not being able to do it right now.

“I can’t see sometimes.” You grumbled as she buttoned them with ease.

“You can’t see sometimes??” Billie asked, raising an eyebrow and biting back a smile.

“Ugh you know what I mean.” You groaned, playfully smacking her hand away once she finished.

After making sure you could get on the bed, Billie quickly went around the apartment, shutting off the lights, making sure your pets were okay, and locking the doors before returning and shutting the bedroom door behind you.

She slipped under the covers, pulling you closer to her, letting you snuggle yourself into her side like a little kitten. Once she was sure you were practically purring like one as well, Billie settled into her own pillow, letting her arm rest on your back.

“Did you write more of your song while you were in the shower?” She asked, squeezing your side quickly.

“Oh my gosh, baby I did and I forgot to tell you.” But it came out more slurred, your eyes were closed and Billie knew it would be minutes before you were fast asleep.

“That’s okay baby. You can tell me now. Sing us to sleep mama,” She whispered, kissing your cheek before settling back in your hold.

“Wait I forgot how it goes.” You were still a little drunk after all. Billie giggled trying to remember your ramblings from earlier in the night.

“I think I remember.. You kept saying “You’re my -“ and then you didn’t finish that bit. And then you were singing it in the kitchen,” Billie opened her eyes to look down at you, you seemed to be asleep at this point, but the slight furrow in your brows told her you were thinking about your little song, so she continued, whispering,

“You’re my, my, my, my….”

“Oh!! You’re my, my, my, my…” you trailed off again.

“Darling, you’re my, my, my, my…”

“Lover.”

[janeyseymour]

Drunk Actions, Sober Thoughts

Summary: Janine's end of the school year party gets a little out of hand- handsy.

WC: ~3.2k

You’ve been a teacher at Abbott Elementary for a few years now, teaching alongside Gregory Eddie as a first grade teacher. And because you’re grade-level partners with one of the  more infamous teachers at the school, you become friends with that group- the group of teachers who tend to be a bit more outspoken and have more of an in with the, at times inconsistent and slightly ridiculous, principal.

You weren’t always a part of that group, but after a couple of months, they began to welcome you with open arms. The one teacher that took you under her wing the most was none other than South Philly Princess Melissa Schemmenti. The rough and tough, often hard to read, leather jacket and eyeliner wearing badass of the school grew close to you quickly once you showed her that you were here to stay.

You don’t even really understand why she took to you the way that she did, but you aren’t complaining. It’s much better to be on her good side rather than her bad side. Although, you would dare to say that she doesn’t have a bad side; she always looks phenomenal.

Because you have this in with the iconic group of Abbott Elementary, you manage to get yourself an invitation to the “party of the century” as Janine Teagues is putting it.

“You’re going, right?” Melissa asks you at lunch.

You chuckle. “Of course I’m going.” Then you lean in closer to her and Barbara. “If only to watch those two-“ You point to Janine and Gregory flirting. “-finally get their shit together.”

Barbara smirks knowingly. “I have a feeling they will.”

“One can only hope,” Melissa rolls her eyes. “They need to get their heads out of their asses and just fuck already.”

“Melissa!” the kindergarten teacher scolds as she smacks her friend’s hand.

The redhead can only shrug. She stands by what she uttered.

You just nudge the woman beside you before closing up your container and standing. “And on that note,” you laugh. “I actually do have some final things I have to finish up in the classroom, so I’ll see you all tonight.”

You leave with a small wave and a smile, and as you turn to go, Melissa’s eyes don’t leave your body.

“Girl,” Barbara’s deep voice pulls the redhead out of her trance. “You got it bad for her.”

Green eyes are rolled so hard that the kindergarten teacher is shocked they don’t get stuck that way. “I do not.”

“I have a feeling Gregory and Janine aren’t going to be the only ones who get it together tonight,” is all the kindergarten teacher mutters to her best friend.

“Oh please,” Melissa groans. “And even if I did have a thing for her, which I do not, it’d never happen. Ain’t no way a young thing like that would want… this.”

Barbara almost quips about how she’s caught you hanging onto every word that Melissa says, how your eyes rarely leave her figure when she isn’t looking, how you tend to follow her around like a lost puppy dog. But she doesn’t. Instead, Barb just shrugs.

The two older women of the friend group show up to Janine’s house an hour early to help get the place in order. And oh is it a good thing they did, at least that’s what they think. In reality, the second grade teacher had planned for that- the life of poor Janine. But they manage to get the small apartment ready in time for the party to begin.

And quietly, Barbara Howard tells herself that she’s going to play matchmaker. She’ll get Gregory and Janine together as much as possible, and she’s also going to attempt to get you and her work wife to finally see what’s going on between the two of you.

A drunk Melissa tends to be a more confident (not that she could get much more confident than she already is) and affectionate person than a sober Melissa. But in order for the redhead to get to that place of feeling good, Land Barbara knows that she’s going to have to let Sea Barbara out of her cage. So right as guests begin to arrive, the kindergarten teacher pours two shots and hands one to her work wife. The two take them in tandem, and then Barbara is mixing up two cocktails- strong cocktails.

“Jesus, Barb,” the second grade teacher grimaces as she wipes the little droplet that dribbled down her chin. “Are you tryin’ to get Sea Barbara to come out?”

The kindergarten teacher just gives an innocent smile, points to the cup, and takes another large swig of her own drink. Melissa follows. 

By the time that you show to the little apartment, the party is in full swing. Janine lets you in with a smile, Gregory by her side. You give your grade-level partner a curious look, but he shakes his head subtly.

“Come in! Come in!” the second grade teacher is all grins. “The- the party got a little hectic, and not everyone is in their assigned places, but… it’s a party!”

You just chuckle and thank Janine for hosting as you step inside. Your eyes scan the place, and in the center of the dance floor is that vibrant red hair that you were hoping to see. She’s… wow. And Barbara is right next to her dancing with a cardboard cutout of… why is Barbara dancing with a cardboard cutout of Allen Iverson?

Despite your confusion about what is taking place in the center of the room, you make your way over.

“Hey, hey,” you yell over the loud music.

“Oh my God!” Melissa yells as she practically throws herself at you. “Where have you been? I’ve been waiting for you!”

“Had dinner with my mom,” you chuckle as you hold her in your arms. Wow. She gives good hugs. And despite the fact that she’s very hot from dancing in such a small space, she smells incredible. “But I’m here now!”

“Yes you are!” Green eyes scan over your outfit, and you can’t help but notice the way that her gaze lingers on the deep neckline of your shirt. “Wow. You look incredible!”

The lights are dim enough that the redhead hopefully can’t see the blush that creeps into your cheeks. You thank God for that one.

“Barb!” Melissa taps her friend. “Look! My girl finally made it!”

Her girl? You hope that your surprise at that title doesn’t show on your face. You just smile and wave to the kindergarten teacher who already seems to be quite inebriated.

“We gotta get you a drink!” the second grade teacher grins. She’s pulling you off towards the drink section before you can even figure out what’s happening.

“Here,” Melissa pours you a rum and coke and shoves it into your hand before you can politely decline the offer.

“Oh,” you chuckle softly. “I wasn’t really planning on drinking tonight… have breakfast with my dad tomorrow morning, and don’t wanna show up too hungover.”

The redhead nods along before reaching for the solo cup and taking a sip of her own concoction. She screws her eyes shut tightly as she swallows. “Damn, I made that strong.”

You roll your eyes before taking the beverage back into your hand and taking a small sip. “Oh my…” you suck in a breath. “Wow, Mel.”

She shrugs with a smile before taking you back into the center of the party. The crowd is mostly people you know, but there are a few unfamiliar faces, or faces that maybe you weren’t quite expecting to be here.

After you ask who one person is, you find yourself being tugged alongside Melissa as she introduces you to those that you aren’t very aware of who they are. It’s hard for you to focus though, because the redhead keeps a warm hand on the small of your back almost the entire time, and whenever someone gets a bit too close to you for her liking, Melissa pulls you flush against her. Each time she does that, her grip gets just the slightest bit tighter on you. It really wouldn’t take that much more to just… lean over and kiss her cheek, or have her kiss yours. You find yourself wishing that’s what would happen, but it never does.

It also catches your attention that she almost always introduces you to everyone as ‘her girl’. You hate to admit it, but you practically glow each and every time she calls you that. You hope you aren’t being too obvious in your feelings for the redhead beside you. Even if you are though, you’re fairly certain that you’re the only relatively sober one here, and then woman clinging to you is beyond hammered at this point.

“My girl,” Melissa nearly purrs as she takes a sip from the red cup that you’ve been carrying around for her. “Thanks for holding my drink, babe.”

“Babe?” you raise your brow with a laugh.

The redhead just shrugs with a grin and shoots you a wink. She finishes it off, sets the cup on the counter, and then she’s pulling you back into the center of the party- the dance floor.

Her hands are all over your body as you dance. They find their way to your back, your hips, and then you feel a hand slip into the back pocket of your jeans as she pulls you closer.

“Mel,” you gasp out in surprise.

She pulls her hand out of your pocket immediately. “Sorry, I- sorry.”

“Eh, don’t be,” you smile at her. If she’s going to touch you, now is the time. She won’t remember it tomorrow, and it’s not like this will ever happen again. “I know I have a great ass, and the only person I would want touching it is you.” You delicately take her hand and put it back where it was.

Melissa’s perfectly drawn on brows creep up her forehead ever so slightly before she resumes her dancing.

From a few paces over, Barbara clocks that act, and she shoots the cameraman an impressed look before going back to dancing with a cardboard Allen Iverson. 

All good things must come to an end, and after about an hour of having the woman of your dreams pressed up against you tightly, practically grinding on you with her hand in your back pocket and squeezing gently from time to time, the party begins to die out. People begin to say their goodbyes, Janine is starting to clean things up, and you see that it’s probably your cue to start heading home for the night. You glance at the clock on the wall, and it’s nearing two in the morning.

The redhead still right by your side, holding onto your arm, whines slightly when the music goes off. She doesn’t extract her hand from your pocket though.

“I think it’s about time we start heading out,” you chuckle gently.

“But I’m having a great time,” Melissa mumbles against your neck.

Your cheeks once again heat up at feeling her hot breath against your skin. Still, you shake your head, and you glance over to Barbara who is attempting to find her shoes that she discarded long ago.

“Barb, how are you getting home?”

“Oh I called Gerald,” the kindergarten teacher promises you.

“Can I hitch a ride?” Melissa asks her work wife. “I don’ wanna get into an Uber like this.”

Barbara, who would usually always take her best friend home, shakes her head though. “Melissa, I am exhausted, and I need to get to bed. I’m sure Y/N will take you home though, right dear?”

You nod. “Yeah, I can take Mel back,” you smile. “Not a problem at all.”

The redhead, in her drunken state, just grins and kisses your cheek before sticking her tongue out at her work wife. “Hear that, Barbie? I don’ need you to give me a ride- not when I have my girl here with me.”

The lights of course turn on before the blush dissipates from your cheeks, and there’s a small stain of where Melissa had kissed your cheek.

“Alright, Mel, let’s start heading out, yeah?” you chuckle softly.

Her hand only leaves your back pocket briefly to hug Barb goodbye, and then it’s slipped right back to where it’s been for the last hour. “You ready to take me home?”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Let’s go, hun.”

You get her to your car, and then when she struggles with the buckle, you can’t help the slight giggle that escapes your lips. She turns to you with a pout.

“Oh, don’t do that,” you laugh softly. With ease, you clip the seatbelt. “Alright, Mel. You gotta direct me.”

She gets you back to her house with ease, although you can’t help but be the slightest bit distracted because while her hand isn’t resting in your back pocket anymore, it’s sitting on your knee and every once in a while glides up to your thigh. Her thumb rubs circles on your jeans warmly, and you can feel her gaze on you.

You pull in to her driveway and smile at her softly.

“I don’t want tonight to end,” Melissa sighs quietly. “Would you want to come in?”

Silently, you turn the key to turn your car off and climb out. You’re at her side a few seconds later, opening the door and holding out a hand to help her out of the car.

The two of you walk up to her house hand in hand, and then Melissa is pulling her keys from her purse. She fumbles with the lock for a few seconds, and then when she pulls the keys out of the lock, she drops them. 

You lean down to pick them up, and when you stand back up, her lips are on your own. It takes a second for your brain to catch up to your body, but the second it does, you’re kissing her back. It’s only a few seconds, but it’s everything you could’ve imagined and more. But you know she’s nowhere near sober.

“Melissa,” you whisper.

Her hand cups your cheek and pulls you in again. You can taste the rum that she was drinking earlier on in the night, but you can’t find yourself to care. Despite the fact that your brain is screaming at you to stop kissing a drunk Melissa, you can’t stop. 

She pushes the door open, and before you know it, you’re pinned up against the wall, and her lips are hungrily on your neck, teeth just barely grazing your collarbone. Her hands and wandering all over your body.

When you realize that she isn’t going to stop any time soon, you know you have to put your foot down. You’re not about to cross a boundary- not when she’s absolutely hammered.

“Mel, you gotta-” You sigh softly. “You gotta stop.”

“I don’t want to,” she whines.

You pull her face away from your chest gently. “And I don’t want you to, but… you’re not in the right state of mind.”

“I’m in the perfect state of mind,” the redhead tells you. “I- I want you.”

“Not like this,” you tell her firmly. “Not when you’re hammered out of your mind. I’m not going to take advantage of you like this.”

“You wouldn’t be,” she continues to try to convince you to keep going.

You shake your head. “Mel, I- I care about you a lot. I don’t want you making a mistake that you aren’t going to want to face tomorrow.”

“It ain’t a mistake,” she tells you. “I been into you since you started workin’ at Abbott. Just didn’t think you’d be into this.”

“Oh, I am,” you chuckle, and you feel the red in your ears, your cheeks, and your chest. “But I think that maybe we should talk about this later… not while you’re drunk.”

“Drunk words and actions are sober thoughts,” Melissa tells you.

You roll your eyes. “I know, hun. I know. But I- I think we need to have a real conversation about this tomorrow.”

“Fine,” the redhead pouts. “But I still don’t want this night to end.”

You smile at her softly. “Why don’t we just hang out then?”

She nods against you, and she pulls you up to her bedroom.

“Melissa.”

“Not for that,” she waves you off. “Just want to change, figured you would want to change too.” She throws a tee and shorts your way.

You make your way to the bathroom and change before knocking on the bedroom door before entering. When you walk in, Melissa is propped up in her bed and scrolling on her phone.

You sit next to her, and your coworker rolls her eyes. “You don’t gotta be so stiff. I ain’t gonna try nothin’ right now. Just want to relax.”

You sigh softly, but you move slightly closer to her. You set your alarm just in case you end up falling asleep here, and then you set your phone down.

“I really do like you, you know. I don’t just want sex from you,” Melissa tells you. “Just needed some liquid courage.”

“I believe you,” you yawn out quietly. “Just don’t want you making a decision while you’re in this state.”

“See, and that’s what I love about you,” the redhead sets her phone down, takes her glasses off, and lays herself down. “You’re you- warm, sweet, considerate, caring… stunning to look at.”

“Get some sleep,” you chuckle softly.

Melissa yawns. “Don’t go tonight though.”

“I won’t,” you promise. “But I do have to slip out early tomorrow morning to meet my dad, so please don’t be concerned if I have to leave before you wake up.”

“I won’t,” your coworker says sleepily. Her eyes close, and she’s sound asleep within minutes.

The next morning, you wake up before your alarm. Your body is practically underneath Melissa- her arms are wound around your waist tightly, her head rests on your chest, and there’s a smile on her lips as she sleeps. It’s hard to tell where her body ends and yours begins.

You shimmy slightly just to turn off your alarm so it doesn’t wake her. Gently, so gently, you untangle yourself from her and slip out of the bed. You gather your things as quietly as you can, and you somehow manage to make your way out of the bedroom without waking her.

Once you’re in the living room, you manage to find a pad and pencil and write her a short, but sweet, note.

I had to slip out to meet my dad for breakfast, but I’ll come by after. We can talk then, because I really do want to talk about the things that happened last night. 

You sign your name with a scrawled out heart, and then you exit the house, mind swirling with what journey you could possibly be embarking on with the redhead of your dreams if she was serious about the things she said last night. 

TAGS: @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @sweetcheeksschemmenti @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @a-queen-and-her-throne @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson @dvrkhcld @cosmichymns @sasheemo @m1lflov3rrr @ricejucie @temilyrights @emilynissangtr @squinnchy @dopenightmaretyphoon @emeraldoceansstuff @shinyfaerielights  @blkmxrvel @marvelwomenrule @sarahjohannson @casualfoxwitch @babytakeittothehead

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Actually a pretty fab line up right now

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

NOV 2024 Week 5

Ongoing Series - Thai

Love Sick 2024 (Sun iQIYI) ep 11 of 15 - This is where the teen awkward comes to grab me by the throat. No other Thai BL does this better than Love Sick (except maybe Make it Right). And it’s always a challenge to watch because Phun is so ready to come out and Noh is so not. I love what cramming 3 eps into one (and better side BL couples) did for the tension and pacing in this particular part of this story. The new version really is excellent. I'm chronicling my experience with 2024 as compared to 2014 here. 

Your Sky (Sun iQIYI) ep 2 of 12 - They are so awkward and I love them so much for it. They are terrible at faking romance, yet Fah want’s Rak so bad. This is moving so slowly but that’s part of it’s charm. I'm not frustrated instead I’m getting Oxygen vibes from it. Or perhaps it’s is more just I feel the way I felt when I was first watching Oxygen. Which is to say, I’m totally addicted and I keep re-watching new episodes. 

Spare Me Your Mercy (Thurs iQIYI) ep 1 of 8 - Gah! JJ grew up so pretty. I love these leads. (No one is shocked.) I love the lawful good paired against (we’re not sure yet but possibly) neutral evil. I love our very sus very flirty very gay doctor. A lot happened in this first episode. I’m getting Manner of Death flashbacks but there’s nothing wrong with that. Bring on the chili. 

Incidentally, if you're interested in true crime, here's the IRL version of this story. How a Nuclear Lab Helped Catch a Serial Killer from the Science Vs podcast.

Jack & Joker (Mon IQIYI) ep 10-12 end - I got the go ahead on a safe ending, and thus I watched the last 3 eps all as one. I love how defiantly verse these two were. I also really enjoyed the final episode. I do like a finale that ends on a bang (yes, both kinds). 

Final thoughts

I enjoyed this show a lot. A caper BL starring two of Thailand's best and focusing on class struggles, corruption, and poverty, was always gonna appeal to me. But I’m not sure, ultimately, whether I liked it because it was good in it’s own right, or because YinWar were so good in it. I do wish it had been a little more Leverage and little less chaos, Dr Evils, and "watch War cry." It was a great vehicle for YinWar, and for them to prove that BL can defy its own tropes. To that end, this goes comfortably into the Manner of Death category more than anything else I’ve encountered befor (although slightly less unhinged). It's good, but it loses the plot, the side couples, and it's own mind a couple of times, and YinWar were definitely greater than the sum of its parts. Thus I feel an 8/10 is fair, especially considering I'm unlikely to rewatch.

The Heart Killers (Weds Gaga) ep 2 of 12 - Dunk is illegally pretty in this show. I gotta say I covet his skin care routine. (I love YinWar as much as the next person, but THIS boy should be the spokes-BL-rep for Laneige.)

Manwhile..... FirstKhao might be GMMTV’s best flirters. It’s a pleasure to watch them just inhabit these characters and bounce off each other. I do keep saying “what tf are they doing?!“ with this show. In this instance, it was the dancing in the bowling alley. What is going on? is it meant to be a Pulp Fiction reference?

Also this gd soundtrack is bonkers. I *can’t!* with the 70s orgy porn music and the very bad not quite metal intro music. And then, I remember, brain must be turned off! (That’s really hard for me OK?)

All that said, both the sauna and the jerk-off scenes were much appreciated. It’s nice to see this kind of visceral physical attraction depicted in a BL, we get it so rarely.  

On a side note, I entirely support Thailand’s one country agenda to put all the cute boys in crop tops. Keep it up. And up. And up. 

Fourever You (Thurs YT) ep 9 of 16 - I just don’t get the (new) main couple. They don’t work for me. I like the surprise gamer boys side crumbs though. They are v cute.

Side quest: Genius move anytime Hill comes on screen to basically have Pond make love to the camera. He v good at it. Break down everyone’s fourth wall, baby. Take no prisoners. 

Caged Again (Fri Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - That exchange! “Are you worried about me” (attempted flirtation) vrs Junior’s response “yes I am.” Just utter frankness. It’s very sweet. All in all this show is very sweet. Somewhat incomprehensible world building, but sweet. And the head lift into the lap was next level adorable. Sun’s shy smile is everything. 

Perfect 10 Liners (Sun YT?) ep 5 of 24 - This show is very silly. I love the sides so much I can’t EVEN. But I think it was a big mistake putting Tay into this show. Never let an OG out of the bottle like that. He gets all our attention because we think he’s gonna grant all our wishes. By which I mean, all I could think the whole time he was on screen was WHY IS HE SO FINE?

I’m not joking, I had to watch his scenes 3x because I kept getting distracted and losing the plot. Not that there is much plot to lose. Just Tay’s mouth. I’ll stop now, but seriously tho LOOK AT HIM!!! 

Every You Every Me (Mon Gaga) ep 8 end - Honestly I’d like to see this pair handed something much more meaty. Like a Japanese adaptation? Tokyo in April is… for example. I think they do a great job with something like that.

Conclusion

This was supposed to be a linked series about reincarnated soulmates, but ended up being more like a Y-Destiny grab bag BL with no rebirth through line, just the same acting pair. The leads were excellent. And I must praise this show for representing things I always want in my BL (and rarely get), switch, verse, communication, and safe sex. It’s just that this format with the same actors but no unifying theme (despite the pitch/packaging) made for a disappointing viewing experience. Some of the installments I enjoyed, and the visuals are on point, but I was ultimately let down by style and execution, if not acting. 6/10 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Youth AKA Miseinen: Mijukuna Oretachi wa Bukiyo ni Shinkochu (Japan Tues Gaga) ep 4 of 11 - “I won’t fall in love with you” is an easy promise to make if you’ve already fallen. I love this show SO MUCH. “Infect me just a little.” Holy fuck. This BOY. Also, so much for “not kissing.” This BL is fantastic. I’m so worried about where it’s going. Japan could very much hurt me with this. I didn’t expect to fall in love so hard.

Man, JBL...... when it gets you it really gets you (then it locks you in a basement and gets kinky). We are not safe but we must sit back and suffer enjoy it. I hate this. I love this. What a rush. 

See Your Love (Taiwan Weds Gaga) ep 7 of 13 - I think this show has a “crash into me” trope in every single ep. This ep alone had 3, plus a flash back to the first one. Still, their damn date was so flipping adorbs!!!

Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 10 of ? - I couldn’t be less interested in the stuff with the mean girls. I’m annoyed we spent so much of this episode on them. Fewer bullies more smooches.

Love in the Air: Koi no Yokan (Japan Sat Gaga) ep 5 of 10 - Arashi as the doting bf was cute if sudden, also holy musical montage BLman.  Kai is my favorite character (as was Sky) but I'm still not wild about the blackmail sex start to this relationship. It does seem a little bit more like Kai went after a one night stand, also bit more switchy, which is better...... I guess. But not by much because the chemistry with these two isn't as good as the original.

I remain suspicious.

It's airing but......

Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues ????) 11 of 12 eps - My source hasn’t yet uploaded 11. So…… I wait. 

Secret Love (? YT?) 13-?? of 81 eps - I don't know what's going on either.

Blue Canvas of Youthful Days (China Sun Viki) paused at eps 9-10 of 12 - I got the "stop" on this one as it's gone (no surprise) dark. Being China can not be relied upon to HEA. So I'm on pause until I'm told it's safe. If it ends sad/bad I will dnf. But for now I wait......

Winter Is Not The Death of Summer (Thai Weds YT) ?? eps - Criminals who meet in prison fall in love. I did find it on YouTube, initially unsubbed, then subs happened by which time I got distracted. The first episode seems to be only six minutes long. It is very pulp. But it is intriguing. For now its to the wayside until someone tells me what it whats to be and if it's headed in a safe direction. Occasionally Thai pulps want to be edgy and it's not a good look on them.

Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) 10 eps - I DNF'd at ep 7, I couldn't make it. I'm weak. Life is hard enough right now, this show made it harder. It’s not what I want from my entertainment. Ends tomorrow.

Bad to Bed (Taiwan Sat YT) 10 eps - This is a little too low production value even for me + just very very odd. DNF

In Case You Missed it - GMMTV 2025 Line Up

There have been a ton of hot takes already, including mine.

Here are the titles and links to MDL for you (confirmed full BLs only), these are organized in order of the ones I'm anticipating the most at the top.

Dare You to Death - trailer

Boys in Love - trailer

Memoir of Rati - trailer

My Magic Prophecy - trailer

Me and Thee - trailer

A Dog and A Plane - trailer

Cat for Cash - trailer

That Summer - trailer

My Romance Scammer - trailer

Head 2 Head - trailer

Ticket To Heaven - trailer

Burnout Syndrome - trailer

Melody of Secrets - trailer

Only Friends Dream On - trailer

Love You Teacher - trailer

Next Week Looks Like This:

End of year drops:

12/4 0.5D (Japan ????) 10 eps - Sales ace, Sada, has a secret that only his junior, Daiki, knows. He has pretended to have a gf for years, resulting in him being a virgin. But now Sada has fallen in love. Confused, Sada seeks advice from his junior. I sense another queer Cyrano De Bergerac. Info here.

12/6 Be Moon - Falling for my enemy's son (China ????) movie from HBD Studio - Not much on this one just a trailer, looks intriguing...... if it's from/through Taiwan, but if it's all China, I'm wary.

12/13 ThamePo Heart that Skips a Beat (Fri YT) 12eps - A boy band member and his documentarian start a forbidden relationship. I LOVE Est and am delighted to see him at GMMTV. This was my #1 pick for 2024. I've been waiting for a Blinding Lights style idol romance and this looks like it might be it (Korea and Japan have systemically disappointed me). Bring it, boys.

12/14 & 12/21 The Renovation (Thai mini One31) 2 eps - Writer turns his blossoming romance with holiday resort owner into a novel.

12/29 Sangmin Dinneaw (Thai ????) ??eps - trailer Childhood friends (Thai & Korean) reunite after being apart for ten years. As the boys reconnect, their bond matures and feelings of romance begin to develop, in Thai.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

His smile. (Caged Again)

Look at them!

Look, I don't mean to tell you your business, but THIS? This is peak Thai BL. This is it. This is What They Do Best. Sure they dabble with silly kinky crimey-whiney fashizzal, but Thailand's true BL power is right here, in the sweet awkward school-set first love arghhhhh. Yes I said, school. Bite me. (Love Sick... damn it, 10 years later and it still has me in a choke hold.)

Hey all you idiots who thought (or think) there is ever a green flag in any Mame ever, this character if for you. This boy, THIS ONE. This is what a walking talking ACTING green flag energy actually looks like. You wanna date a dude? Find you one like him. Okay, peaches? sheesh

Meanwhile, this, this is not a green flag. This is GMMTV thinking they are being clever by calling out Thai BLs' worst behavior to make a character who has 'slightly less than worst behavior' look better. Sigh. When meta is used for ill gotten gains.

This, on the other hand is meta being cleverly deployed.

And this is language play. P'ABL's favorite.

So endeth this lesson.

(last week)

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

[mydearesthrry]

sweet nothing - h.s.

a/n: TOTALLY LOST THE PLOT WHILE WRITING THIS. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE BASED OFF OF THE PICTURE BELOW BUT I GOT DISTRACTED. pls listen to sweet nothing by taylor swift for the full experience!!!

🎀 warnings/cw: none, most tooth rotting fluff ever.

🐇 pairing: fem!reader x harry styles

💐 wc: 1.6k

summary: taking care of a very sleepy harry in an ice bath, and in the car.

“H, the bath is ready, bub.” Harry heard his girlfriend call quietly to him. He was slumped on the couch, this show particularly draining. He was quieter than usual, and instead of being glued to Y/N’s side like he usually was, he let one kiss to her full lips suffice before he decided to rest. 

“Mm, thank you, lovie. I’ll… I’ll be there in a second, jus’ don’t have the energy to go there right now.” His limbs were sore, almost every part of his body completely lost of energy, and he found it hard to even entertain the thought of getting up. 

“Okay… y’know what, just let me help you, H. The faster we get you into this bath, the faster we can go back to the hotel so you can sleep.” He knew she was right, and because he knew she was right, he allowed her to help (though not really at all since he already had felt bad that she ran the ice bath for him) him get to the bathroom. They walked slowly to the connected bathroom, Harry walking zombie-like in her arms. 

“Ready, sweet boy?” She tried to be as quiet as possible, the fact that Harry probably had a headache in the front of her mind. He nodded softly, stripping down to his boxers before letting her help him balance as he stepped into the bath. 

A wince immediately left him, Y/N whispering out ‘I’m sorry’s, knowing how shocking the bath was at first. She lowered herself with him, and sat on the floor next to the bucket when he sat down, submersing himself fully. 

“Okay bubs, y’know we’ve gotta do this so you don’t fall asleep on me. You ready?” Y/N says, pulling out her phone to pull up the trivia questions she’d pre written for the late night ice bath trivia that had become a tradition for them. Harry hums, and she flips to her notes to start. 

“Pick the category, my love. We’ve got pop culture, or the Marvel Cinematic Universe.” She asked, looking up at him, heart breaking a little at the exhausted expression that was obvious on his face. 

“Marvel.” He mumbles, sinking himself lower until his neck up was the only part of his body above water. 

“Okay… Timer officially starts now. Who played the character Pietro Maximoff, also known as Quicksilver?” Her tone was soft, almost at a whisper. 

“Umm… Aaron Taylor Johnson?” Harry questioned, racking his brain to try his hardest to stay awake. His body had now gotten used to the stark cold that he’d slowly started to get used to over the times he’s done this on tour. 

“Good job, baby. What was the name of Peter Parker’s love interest in Spider-Man: Homecoming? This one should be easy, it’s one of my favorite movies.” She giggled, a serene sense of peace overcoming her at the domesticity of it all. 

“It is easy, she’s called Liz, right? Liz Allan, or something.” His eyes were now closed, feeling the tension in his body slowly disintegrate from the cold of the water. 

“Perfect! Though the both of us know that Peter and MJ were the better couple, they were entirely more in love and cuter.” She smiled. 

“Oh, really? Like us then, hm?” Harry hummed. 

“Yes, H, exactly like us.” A few more questions had passed, and Lloyd had now come to join them in the bathroom, his camera hung around his neck. They’d anticipated him coming anyway, knowing that he would come to snap some behind the scenes pictures. Before they’d even left to go to his dressing room, they’d told Lloyd when to come in so that he could come talk to them. 

“Hey guys, sorry for intruding, but I need one of you to pick a few pictures for tonight so I can get them edited by tomorrow.” Lloyd tried to keep his voice quiet too, knowing the kind of atmosphere he was entering before he even came to meet the two in the bathroom. 

“Oh yeah, of course, did you want some pictures too?” Harry smiled, a tired but polite look on his face. Harry had built a great relationship with Lloyd over the months that they’ve been on tour, and they’d gotten more comfortable with each other than they’d anticipated. 

“Only if you’re comfortable, H.” Lloyd smiled. Y/N and Lloyd talked for a second, scrolling through pictures and picking out a few for him to edit. The time they took allowed Harry to rest in the cold for a little, before pushing himself up and folding over, dipping his head into the ice cold water. He could faintly hear Lloyd’s footsteps move to the front of the tub, along with the flicking of the camera shutter going off as he lifted his head out of the tub, ringing out his hair from the nape of his neck to the front of his scalp. 

A couple more flutters from the camera shutters were heard when Harry was rubbing his eyes with the pruny tips of his fingers, and he failed to see the smile on Lloyd’s face. 

Lloyd pulled the camera from his eyes, looking at the digital screen that held a preview of the picture. In the corner, slightly blurred because of the harsh focus that was set on Harry in the center, say Y/N with a soft smile playing on her lips, a moony gaze in her eyes. He made a mental note to send it to them later, and to also crop her out in the final edit in an attempt to salvage their private relationship. 

“Perfect. I’ll let you two rest now, think I’m gonna head to the hotel now myself. Sleep well, you guys, I’ll send you the pictures in the morning.” Lloyd smiles at them, sharing goodnights before closing the door behind him as he walked out. 

Harry’s now damp hair was combed back by his fingers and rested on the top of his head, save for the rogue curl that shriveled in a tiny curl on his forehead. Y/N rested her arms on the side of the tub, a gleam in her eyes as she watched Harry’s relaxed expression. Her timer, however, had different plans for the relaxed couple, and went off with shrill screams, notifying them that it was now time for Harry to leave the bath. 

“Alright sweet boy, time to go.” She tapped on her screen to stop the ringing, standing up to grab his black and white striped towel. She met him in the middle, her boyfriend already standing on the towel that laid outside of the tub, water droplets falling from his body in a soft cascade, small shivers shaking his shoulders slightly. Wrapping the towel around his shoulders, she pushes herself up onto her tiptoes to meet the level of his face, pecking soft kisses onto his cold lips. They stayed in that position for a bit, waiting for Harry’s skin to absorb the rest of the small water droplets. 

She led him with a soft tug to the main space in the dressing room, taking the outfit she’d gotten ready for him while he was on stage from the makeup chair and placed it onto the couch. Leaning down a bit, she took the towel to let him remove his now soaked briefs, before passing him a pair of boxers, tossing his towel onto the back of the couch. She passed him his clothes as he dressed himself slowly, humming at the words of love and admiration he sleepily spewed out. Once he got his last article of clothing on, she took his hoodie strings into her hands and tugged it down softly, making him lean down a bit to meet her lips. 

Their lips connected in a soft caress, his bottom lip wedges in between her two lips, a sweet hum emitting from his throat from the taste of her coconut flavored chapstick, one that was his favorite. Something that could only be described as love seemed to fill the room whenever they had these kinds of moments. Moments that was completely and purely their own. 

They broke away from the kiss, and when Harry went to say something, a yawn cut him off, mouth opening wide making him resemble something of a lion, making a giggle fall from her slightly swollen lips. “Let’s get you into a bed, sleepy boy.” 

“M’kay.” Harry didn’t put up a fight, wanting to get into bed with her to snuggle more than anything. 

They walked through the halls of the venue, pushing through the back door where their driver was already waiting for them, engine started and purring softly. Y/N opens the back car door, stepping in and moving to the side since she knew Harry would follow her. The driver muttered that it would take them about 5 to 10 minutes to get to the hotel before taking off without another word. 

Y/N snapped her seatbelt on, a confused twinge on her face when she didn’t see Harry do the same. Instead, he scooted over to the middle seat, laying into her sleepily. “H, you gotta put on your seatbelt.” 

“Noooo, s’not even that far, and I jus’ wan’ y’to hold me right now.” He mumbled, slightly muffled from the way he burrowed his face into her neck. She sighed in slight exasperation, saying nothing and just letting him completely collapse and rest into her. He was almost laying completely in her lap, her hand in his hair, a soft smile playing on her lips as she looked out the window and into the city. 

She let out a tiny giggle when she felt the slight tickle of stubble on her neck, followed by sweet kisses on the expanse of it. “I love you, love y’so much, it hurts.” 

“I love you, H.” She intertwined their fingers together, bringing up his hand to her mouth and pressing featherlight kisses onto his knuckles. 

“I love you,” Harry whined, making the smallest of smiles cover her face since knew how clingy and lovey Harry got when he was tired. She tried to relish in these moments as much as possible. 

“I love you, sweet boy, the Peter Parker to my Michelle Jones.” A sweet giggle sounded from Harry as he remembered the conversation from earlier. 

“Entirely in love and cute. I agree.” 

[schmergo]

Today I learned a fact that kinda blew my mind, and I'm almost astonished I didn't know this before as someone whose chief interests include zoo animals, the U.S. Presidency, true crime, and D.C. history. What an opener, right? How could those topics possibly combine?

Well, buckle up and get ready to hear how negligent National Zoo leadership potentially could have killed a US President or started a local epidemic. Spoiler alert: They didn't. But only because luck was in their favor.

First, the part that I DID already know. In 2004, Lucy Spelman stepped down as the director of the National Zoo after a spate of controversial zoo incidents, including a string of unfortunate (and often preventable) animal deaths, misleading and missing zoo records, and other signs of negligence. The AZA even "tabled" renewing the National Zoo's accreditation for a year until they made some significant improvements. Spelman was also a vet and some of the cases she was accused of bungling happened at her own hands, not just under her supervision. It was a major disgrace for a zoo that was meant to represent the nation's capital.

I was in elementary school during these fraught years and I remember devouring articles about this in the newspaper, riveted with shock and dismay. Some of the deaths were just bad luck, but others were obviously negligent. The most infamous case was two red pandas killed by rat poison shallowly buried in their enclosures as a slapdash solution to the zoo's pest problem. A young zebra died of starvation and hypothermia after Spelman ordered the zebras' feed be cut in half, an orangutan was euthanized due to a recurrence of cancer that didn't exist (she actually had salmonella), a lion died after being administered over twice the usual amount of anesthetic, and more. I remember the names and details of these animals from when I first read these cases 20 years ago. But the one I'm talking about today is that of Nancy the elephant.

Nancy was a 46-year-old African elephant whose health had been steadily declining for several years. She suffered from a bone infection in her foot that seriously affected her mobility and quality of life. She had lost a lot of weight, she was fatigued, she even lay down at times. Nobody could be blamed for deciding to euthanize the obviously ill animal.

But they could be blamed for what was discovered in the necropsy after she was euthanized. While she did indeed have a diseased foot, the bone infection was only "moderate." Why, then, was she so obviously unwell? Her lungs had been destroyed by the effects of untreated tuberculosis. It was the tuberculosis, not the sore foot, that most contributed to her decline in health.

Here’s the scary part: nobody knows how long she'd had it because she hadn't been tested for tuberculosis, a known concern for zoo elephants, in TWO YEARS. All this despite the fact that it's MANDATORY for all zoo elephants to receive a tuberculosis test once per year-- and in fact, it was a National Zoo staff member who pushed for that reform in the first place. And the elephant was on Prednisone for her foot issues, which zoo staff noted in her records made her more vulnerable to illnesses like TB. In fact, none of the zoo's elephants had been tested recently, which meant any of them, including one who was pregnant, may have had tuberculosis, too.

There are documented cases of humans catching tuberculosis from elephants. Now, Nancy the elephant had bovine tuberculosis, which seems to be less contagious to humans and which elephants haven't so far spread to humans... BUT it has spread to humans from black rhinos, a fairly close relative, so it seems likely that elephants COULD spread it. It can also take a while for TB for incubate (and can also be latent without symptoms), especially for elephants, so the elephants OR keepers who were around Nancy were at serious risk for TB.

NOW HERE IS THE PART THAT I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT UNTIL TODAY:

Spelman actively tried to COVER UP the situation, potentially putting many more people at risk. The elephant house was closed to zoo guests, but they were only told it was for "renovations." (The actual renovations, incidentally, were to improve ventilation so that illness would be less likely to spread.)

A BBC news crew that came to film the elephants was asked to keep a healthy distance from the elephants for their emotional health and the crew's safety-- the explanation given was that the elephants' group dynamics had been thrown off by Nancy's death. Spelman instructed zoo staff not to mention the TB situation to the BBC crew and, if asked why Nancy died, they were to respond that it was for multiple reasons and that the official test results weren't all back yet.

And here's the most shocking part of all, the part that made me GASP out loud. Spelman still personally gave some special VIP behind-the-scenes tours of the elephant house during the months that the elephant house was closed, a time when the remaining elephant inhabitants could potentially still develop active TB.

One VIP who received an elephant house tour was PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON and five family members!!!!

BILL. CLINTON. THE GOSHDARN PRESIDENT.

While zoo staff says that the tour was deliberately distanced and nobody got close to an elephant, there are photos of Bill Clinton's nephew about a foot away from an elephant's trunk. You know, their nose. The part they can spread disease with. So, uh, definitely in the danger zone there.

Hillary Clinton's brother, Tony Rodham, was on the tour and he said that nobody in the party was warned about TB risk or asked if they had any medical conditions that might (a. make them susceptible to communicable disease, or (b. be contagious to the elephants. This is especially egregious because according to zoo guidelines, all behind-the-scenes tour participants MUST be asked these questions-- not just when there's a very real possibility of a TB outbreak at the zoo.

Fortunately, none of the zoo's other elephants OR keepers ever tested positive for tuberculosis. But it was certainly a close call! And imagine what would have happened if a US President caught TB from a close encounter with an elephant thanks to poorly managed zoo staff.

Presidents meet a lot of people. In fact, this zoo visit happened only 2 weeks before the inauguration of President George W. Bush, which Clinton attended. He very well could have started a TB outbreak there. Heck, TWO US Presidents could have been infected!

Now THAT is something I will be thinking about for a long time!

[genericpuff]

All That Glitters is Not Feminism - An Analysis of LO's Brand of "Feminism" and What Remains of its Fanbase (The Twist)

Alright y'all, I've been waiting a hot minute to talk about this because I wanted to see how it fully panned out before saying anything about it. And it's not even specifically about LO, but I do think it's very adjacent to it in a way that I'm sure you'll be shocked to hear. Much of it speaks to how we prop up white writers even at the expense of POC.

This is 'the twist' attached to my first post that I made just a couple hours ago that concerns an entirely other topic but I feel ties into this subject very well.

If you haven't heard, there's this author who recently fucked around in the Del Rey publishing scene.

Her name is Cait Corrain.

In the original tweet calling this person out, names were not dropped, but it was made very clear that what Cait did was unacceptable behavior.

You can read the entire thread that started it all from Xiran here:

There's also a GREAT recap thread from one of the affected authors, Bethany Baptiste:

I want to make it clear that Cait Corrain isn't just a debut author.

Cait Corrain is - or now, was (foreshadowing is a literary device that-) - a debut author who had an agent, a publishing deal with Del Rey (an imprint of Random House which is a MAJOR publisher) and even an upcoming Illumicrate deal - meaning, her book was going to be packaged in a monthly loot crate subscription shipped directly to people's doors, quite possibly one of the best marketing deals a debut author could ever get, usually unheard of in this industry. All the pre-reviews were strong and positive.

Cait's book was literally set up for success. All she had to do was sit back, relax, and watch the fruits of her labors roll in. She had written the book. It was ready for release. The hard part was technically over.

But I guess the racism brainrot got to her because as it turns out, since April - for EIGHT MONTHS - she's been making alternate accounts on GoodReads to review bomb the indie and debut works of her friends and peers, most of whom were POC and did not have the same opportunities set up for them as she did. There are loads of receipts to back this up that you can find in those above threads ^^^

To say that this is appalling is an understatement. This was an intentional and deliberate act of racism by a white queer writer who claimed to be "jealous" - of what, I can't imagine - so much so that she deliberately sabotaged her peers, people who had supported her and her book.

And then when she got caught? She doubled down on it and claimed it was a "friend", also an alternate account she made up.

The exchange between her and this made-up person is actually the funniest shit out of this entire thing, it's so poorly written and as soon as people noticed the time stamps were out of order, that was when it truly cemented her newfound clown status.

"oooooh he's standing right behind me, isn't he?" energy right here LMAO

yes keep expositing cait, that's really selling the "this is a genuine conversation that really happened with a real person" bit 🤡

Anyways, it became abundantly clear that Cait was just going to continue to dig her heels in over something she caused.

This has been a hot topic in the UnpopularLO Discord, not just because of how crazy of a situation it is that we had to talk about it - and we have people within the community who work in the literature and media sector - but because we noticed one very telling thing in the list of series that she had review bombed in her very own personal act of wrath.

You see, Cait made one fundamental mistake that led to her undoing - she didn't just review bomb the works of her peers, she positively reviewed her own book and others.

What's her book about though?

It's an Ariadne x Dionysus retelling set in space.

It's literally another "modern retelling" of Greek myth.

And wouldn't you know it, guess who else created a modern retelling of Greek myth that she included in her positive review raiding while she was sabotaging the work of her actual peers?

Now, I think it goes without saying that what I'm about to say should be taken with MOUNTAINS of salt, I'm sure a lot of you are reading the headline and going, "Ugh, really? You're gonna make this about LO? Could you give it a rest already???"

I need you to understand, with the current state of Rachel's fanbase and 'modern' Greek myth literature as a whole, at this point Lore Olympus - and the works that are literally inspired by it such as A Touch of Darkness - has basically become the shopping cart litmus test of basic decency. It's like when someone says they like Harry Potter - you can't take it automatically at good faith anymore, because there isn't a whole lot separating someone who simply liked Harry Potter as a kid and still rewatches the movies from time to time from someone who fully supports the politics and agenda of J.K. Rowling. No, not everyone who still watches the movies or reads the books fondly is a TERF by default, but it's justifiably a reason for suspicion when the consequences are often too dire to risk.

There's this thing that's been happening in the LO fanbase that I frankly saw coming, but has really recently started to hit its peak. It's what I call the "Kanye Effect", where the comic has become so absurd and backwards in its misogyny and white feminism that the only people who seem to be left supporting LO are the people who are legitimate white feminists and misogynists - because all the normal level-headed people fell off the comic ages ago (or transitioned into the critical side of the community).

I mentioned it in my last post, but it bears repeating - Rachel's fanbase has literally been shipping Hera, a victim of abuse, with her abuser, Kronos. I'm really hoping a lot of them realize how fucked up that is now that Hera herself has called it what it is - abuse - within the comic, but I also can't count on the LO fanbase picking up on that or even noticing it with how quickly people swipe through it each week, it's very apparent at this point that most of LO's readers don't know how to chew their food and don't pay attention when Persephone and Hades aren't onscreen.

But I'm digressing. Or am I? We're talking about Crown of Starlight after all. The debut Dionysus x Ariadne sci-fi/fantasy romance that was quite literally advertised using Lore Olympus as its baseline-

This. This is what the ongoing cultural erasure and white feminist uwu-fication of Greek myth is doing to the literary zeitgeist surrounding Greek myth as a whole. This is why we criticize Lore Olympus and works like it that are created by disingenuous people who only seek to use the assets of Greek myth material as a way to shoot themselves up into fame and stardom. This is why we demand better standards in the literature and webcomic industry, so that people like Rachel and Cait can't use their privileges to quite literally erase the source material that they used to make themselves famous in the first place.

If anything, Cait's actions didn't just affect the people she negatively review bombed, or the people she was affiliated with, but also the people she positively reviewed. While I don't support what Rachel creates, she wasn't the only one who Cait went out of her way to review positively from her alt accounts, there were many others as evident in the Google Doc - but all this really does is tarnish the legitimacy of these books and their ratings by artificially jacking up their numbers that are advertised to others.

Making Greek myth fanfiction or fun creative retellings was never the problem, but it's now being sabotaged alongside so many other genres and mediums by toxic white individuals who can't even keep themselves from committing hate crimes, let alone create something purely for entertainment that's transparent in its illegitimacy, lest it destroy the illusion that these people are qualified to speak over those whose voices are being stifled, often by these very same people. Many of these writers get caught and are still allowed to continue what they're doing - that was certainly what we feared with Cait.

Until today.

It was revealed today that Cait's book will no longer be featured in the Illumicrate May 2024 box.

Del Rey has dropped Crown of Starlight from their publishing schedule.

Daphne Press will be hopefully following suit.

And, most telling of all, Cait's own agent has severed ties with her.

For anyone not familiar with the inner workings of the publishing industry, Cait has essentially been blacklisted. Without an agent or a publishing house, she'll have to entirely rely on her own resources through self-publishing. Unless she manages to sneak her way back in under an alias (which I wouldn't put it past her to try) she no longer has access to the mainstream publishing industry that was already guaranteed for her before she let her 'jealousy' get the better of her.

Her career was already made for her. She had a red carpet laid out for her debut. Her book was getting good pre-reviews and she had quite literally nothing keeping her from her success. The best thing she could have done was nothing. Somewhere in her head, she made up a threat that didn't exist, and sealed her fate in acting on it, a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I think in these situations such as with Cait Corrain, Rachel Smythe, and - also recently and relevant - James Somerton, we need to become increasingly aware of how white voices are still overpowering POC voices, not just in their actions, but in the opportunities they're given over others which they then use to further stifle the voices of those they feel "threatened" by or feel entitled to speak over. While neither James nor Rachel have used sock puppet accounts to "take out the competition" (at least as far as we know lmao) James did quite literally steal the words and voices of queer writers who were deserving of their time in the spotlight, and Rachel's work is being quoted as "rewriting Greek myth" as if its blatant gentrification and appropriation should be marketed as some sort of positive.

It's all too common for these deeply-rooted prejudices to rear their ugly heads and for the people who carry them to act out in this way while justifying it as "jealousy" or "a mistake". This isn't jealousy. This isn't a mistake. This isn't someone "starting drama". This is genuine, targeted hate, with the intention of snuffing out the voices of others who should be empowered, not silenced.

All that time and effort, and for what? Racism and petty jealousy? It just goes to show, it doesn't matter how many opportunities you're given, how high up on the ladder you already are - it won't fix the deeply-rooted insecurity and racial pettiness that spurs people on to do such horrible things.

I've spent enough of my time and words today talking about Cait, and James, and Rachel. So to end this off, I want to join in with all the others who have highlighted the books that were review-bombed by Cait, and help in uplifting them so they can have successful debuts. I'll be pre-ordering a few of them, so I'll be happy to make dedicated posts for them in the future after they release. Please consider purchasing them for yourself if you want some new reading material <3

The Poisons We Drink by Bethany Baptiste:

So Let Them Burn by Kamilah Cole:

To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods by Molly X Chang:

Mistress of Lies by K.M. Enright

Voyage of the Damned by Frances White:

(I'm sure there are plenty others so if I missed any here, please let me know so I can add them here and check out their books!)

If there's any silver lining to this, I hope that it makes people aware of the media they consume and who it's being created by. I hope it makes people more willing to seek out the books that aren't getting the same opportunities as Cait Corrain and Rachel Smythe. I hope it's a wake-up call to the industry that matters like this need to be taken seriously and that POC writers are still being silenced under their own noses. And most of all, I hope it's a reminder that we shouldn't even need at this point that this behavior is not okay, no matter what level a person climbs to - that just because someone is part of one minority doesn't mean they're not capable of sabotaging another. It sucks that that has to be said, it sucks that despite these groups being so intersectional there are still people within them who submit to their deeply-rooted insecurities and find ways to feel threatened that they use to justify hateful behavior.

Having a platform is a privilege. It should never be weaponized against your own peers or those who you simply feel "threatened" by for no reason beyond your own imposter syndrome or doubts or internal struggles. Because as much as you may feel like you've earned where you are, that never gives you the right to weaponize your opportunities against others who were never given those same opportunities in the first place. "Feminism" is not using your power to crush "other women". "Progressiveness" is not exclusive to the progress that only benefits you.

I wish only the best to those who were affected by the actions of Cait Corrain. You deserve to be heard and seen and appreciated for the work you do and the abuse you've had to tolerate. I look forward to your debuts in 2024 <3

[mylovesstuffs]

OT13 reaction to their streamer s/o who is always playing horror games

Request: CELESTEEE HEAR ME OUTTTT!!!! OT13 WITH STREAMER S/O THAT ALWAYS PLAY HORROR GAME!!! Imagine wonu being nonchalant watching his s/o play poppy playtime LMAOOO

- ⭐️ anon

A/N: I GOT YOU! (I'm not a gamer or streamer but the only, ‘game’ that most streamers play a I plaued, happened to be horror lol)

Seungcheol – Protective but tries to hide it

At first, he’s nonchalant but lowkey concerned. He’s protective, so he’ll check in every now and then just to make sure you’re okay.

"Are you sure this game’s not too scary? If you want, we can play something else." He’ll joke around but he’s always ready to rush in if you get scared.

He’s used to your horror game streams but when it gets intense, he might sit beside you, secretly holding your hand, trying to seem chill but his eyes keep darting to the screen.

Jeonghan – Mocking but supportive

He’s soooo chill watching you play, making sarcastic comments the entire time.

"Are you sure you’re playing a game or auditioning for a screaming doll role?" He’ll tease you, but also lowkey enjoy because he knows you can handle it.

When you get scared, he’ll just laugh, but he’s the one who’ll be first to run over and comfort you if the game gets too creepy. He knows how to poke fun at you, but he’s also there for you.

Joshua – Mildly worried but cheering you on

Joshua’s the type to be genuinely concerned, always asking if you’re okay during the more intense parts of the game.

"You’re okay, right?” or, “You know you don’t have to keep playing if it’s getting too much." But he’s still super supportive, smiling whenever you triumph over the scary moments.

He might even get too into it, cheering for you during jumpscares, "YES, YOU GOT THIS!"

Jun – Silent support with occasional commentary

Jun’s quietly watching and his face never really changes—he’s just super intrigued by your reactions and the game’s storyline.

Every now and then, he’ll just look at you with a smirk when you jump, giving a funny side-eye.

"I don’t know how you can play these games, but…good for you!" But when you scream, he’ll have that silent yet amused look like, “I’m here if you need me, but you got this.”

Hoshi – Full-on hype mode

Hoshi is all-in, he’s probably yelling at the screen with you. If it’s a jumpscare, you best believe he’s going to react as if he’s playing the game too!

"RUN!! RUN FASTER!" He’ll scream to you to get through the scary parts with enthusiastic hype.

He might even jump on the couch beside you to share your shock and start dancing around after every victory in the game. He’s your cheerleader.

Wonwoo – Nonchalant but secretly intrigued

Wonwoo is the observer, seemingly nonchalant but secretly intrigued.

He’ll watch your streams, never looking phased, even when the game gets intense. He’ll probably be more interested in the game’s story than your reactions lol, but he does enjoy the occasional chuckle at your screams.

He might even poke fun at you when you get scared, but deep down, he admires your courage.

Woozi – Impressed and a little impressed with your bravery

When he watches you play, he’ll be impressed by your focus and the fact that you can handle such terrifying games.

"I don’t know how you’re still playing this. You’re braver than me, honestly."

When you scream, he’ll slightly smirk and give you an understanding look. He may not express his concern outright but he’s always making sure you’re okay.

Dokyeom – Laughing with you

Kyeom is a big ball of energy, so watching you play horror games is like a comedy show to him.

"OH MY GOD! DID YOU SEE THAT?? YOU WERE ABOUT TO DIE!!" He’ll laugh with you at your reactions but also give lots of encouragement when things get tense.

If you get scared, he’ll comfort you in the cheeriest way possible, making sure you’re laughing too.

Mingyu – Biggest cheerleader & lowkey scared

Mingyu is cheering you on even though he might be lowkey scared of the game himself.

"Wow, this is intense! I couldn’t do this!" He’ll hype you up during the scary parts, but if you scream, he’ll jump back in his seat.

If the game gets too scary, he’ll give you a big hug to help calm you down because he’s not afraid to show he’s got your back.

Minghao – Curious & cool about it

Minghao is curious but calm. He's definitely the type to not freak out no matter how scary the game gets.

He'll watch quietly beside you, but when you’re totally invested in the game, he’ll offer suggestions like, "Try checking that room. Maybe there’s something there."

If you get really scared, he might softly laugh but will always reassure you afterward with a, "You’re doing well."

Seungkwan – Super dramatic and protective

Seungkwan is dramatic af, watching you play horror games is like a full-on live experience.

"YOU’RE NOT GONNA GO IN THERE, ARE YOU?!" He’s not afraid to show concern (and a lot of dramativs), but deep down, he’s super protective and loves the thrill of it.

If you get scared, he’ll comfort you with a dramatic speech about how you’ve got this but expect to laugh with him the whole time.

Vernon – Chill but interested

Vernon is super chill, watching you play without much reaction, but you can tell he’s intrigued.

"So…what makes you like these games? I don’t get it, but it’s interesting."

He might ask questions about the storyline while paying attention to the details you’re into.

If you scream, he’ll be completely unfazed, maybe giving a small chuckle, but he’s always there to support.

Dino – Hyped & ready to play

Dino is your biggest fan when you play horror games.

"You’ve got this! Show them you’re fearless!" He’ll hype you up during the intense moments, practically cheering you on like you’re in a gaming competition.

He loves to watch you be confident, and if you get too scared, he’ll give you a big hug and tell you you’re doing awesome, maybe even offering to join in and play together.

[seokminfilm]

this man | yoon jeonghan

pairing: yoon jeonghan x reader

warnings: non-idol au, horror au, mystery, hints of slowburn??, deity!jeonghan (consider this lyr's late late LATE halloween special), even if jeonghan is an evil deity he is still a jokester, mentions of nightmares & horror-related things, based off of the 'this man' album and some analog horror elements, jeonghan's kinda awful in this, reader does not give two craps about jeonghan trying to drive her crazy, silly arguments ensue

now playing: this man, jxw & solitariat, oliver buckland

word count: a little over 1k (thank you @slytherinshua)

Jeonghan couldn't understand why he couldn't get into your head.

That's what he did best—he picked an innocent human, tainted by struggle, hurt, and the ways of everyday life, laying them down to sleep before he ruined their life in the most fun way he possibly could. Yes, it was evil, and yes, it was awful to the unsuspecting person he would choose, but what was Jeonghan supposed to do about it?

Beggars can't be choosers, can they?

It irked him though: you were unaffected by everything he did. Even when he caught you in a vulnerable position, sleeping soundly in your bed late at night, he couldn't seem to break through. There was a little something there—something in your mind that kept you safe and sound.

Jeonghan wanted to break it. He wanted to break you.

He sat quietly in the corner of your room, glaring over at the lamp in currently still on the highest setting. Jeonghan wasn't a big fan of light, as he was used to being in the dark (that's where all the good stuff happened), but if he had to blend in, the light wouldn't hurt him that badly.

He didn't have to blend in though, and therefore it hurt him.

Your dream played out as a movie in front of Jeonghan—he could see it all, from the parts that made little to no sense to the scenes that had real-life connections to your day, which amused Jeonghan. You had a mix of both realistic and nonsensical dreams, which gave him the perfect opportunity to slip in when the line became blurry.

There it was—the same scene he always got so close to getting into: you were sitting on a dusty old couch in a dingy room, television too bright as a man sat across from you.

The man had a crooked smirk on his face, and he offered you something every time, to which you would always say no—also making Jeonghan lose his chance to slip in and get you at your weakest point.

He looked eerily similar to Jeonghan too, with the same teasing gaze and sharp, delicate features that Jeonghan had familiarized himself with many times before.

The man said his repeated line, and you looked at him with your sparkling eyes, listening to his every word. Jeonghan stood over you now, ready to touch his cold fingertips to your cheek and take you away to his dimension. He smirked at your resting figure, taking joy in the fact you wouldn't know what had hit you.

And then, you said no, and woke up suddenly—shattering Jeonghan's plan altogether.

You weren't supposed to see him; no one was ever supposed to see the man—This Man—with their own eyes. It was an urban legend, one that Jeonghan got pleasure from seeing humans believe and converse over.

And now, that was all ruined because you woke up without giving Jeonghan a warning sign like a polite victim would.

"What are you doing in my house?" You asked—your voice was raised, and your hair was standing up on your arms, but you couldn't seem to feel fear in that moment. You were too in shock to scream or cry, and Jeonghan could feel your heart slowing down in your chest as you sat up under your sheets.

"Well, I was going to put you into a deep and ruin your life with a tap of my fingers, but you put an end to that so—congratulations," Jeonghan said sarcastically, stepping away from the side of your bed as his heels hit the floor.

You observed him as he sauntered back to your desk chair, sinking into its embrace with an air of relaxed confidence. He leaned back, the chair creaking softly under his weight, while his leg swung rhythmically, a casual pendulum of energy. His soft, black hair cascaded around his shoulders, creating a dark halo that framed his striking features, drawing attention to his sharp, intense eyes that seemed to hold a world of emotions. Jeonghan's skin, a ghostly pale, shimmered like porcelain, exuding an almost ethereal beauty that made him seem both fragile and alluring—like a delicate doll waiting to be admired and touched.

He was strikingly beautiful, resembling a premonition that filled you with more excitement than fear.

"Instead of gaping at me like you've seen a ghost, you could say sorry," Jeonghan replies simply, shocking you out of your stupor as you scoff just seconds later.

"Say sorry? You're a man who's in my bedroom at midnight standing over me and watching me sleep—why would I be the one to apologize here?" You ask with an accusatory tone, and Jeonghan laughs, voice melodic and teasing as he leans forward in his chair, eyeing you down.

"Oh, I think I'm going to like you." Jeonghan smiles, teeth blindingly white as you pull your blankets over you, suddenly feeling exposed.

"You're..." You trail off, and Jeonghan nods, face proud as if he's read your mind and is more than happy to make himself known to you.

"Yes, I'm the Man they keep talking about. You can admire me, I don't mind it." Jeonghan's voice is lifted as he looks up at you through his long eyelashes, and you slowly get out of bed, still wary of what you're seeing as Jeonghan sighs.

"There's no need to be all suspicious of me—I am who I say I am," Jeonghan states, and he smiles at you, taking note of your wide eyes.

"Why are you here? At my house?" You ask another question, and Jeonghan sighs as if he's answering a question you've asked him for the umpteenth time.

"I wanted to get you next. But obviously, you had different plans." Jeonghan scoffs, and you stare back at him, still confused. "Get me?"

"I was going to go into your head while you sleep, interfere in your dream in some way, and then ruin your life and or drive you insane." Jeonghan giggles lightheartedly, standing up from his chair as he walks towards you. His strides are long and relaxed, heels resounding through your room as his eyes land on you.

"You're too strong though. I can't get in." Jeonghan's voice drops down to a bone-chilling whisper, and you flush, averting your eyes as he pulls away.

"You intrigue me, and I plan to learn about you more and more as time goes on. I want what you have." Jeonghan's eyes burn through your skin, but you suddenly don't mind it.

Jeonghan—The Man—intrigues you too, and you plan to know more about him as well.

for @kstrucknet | feedback & reblogs are greatly appreciated!!

[novelcain]

Heyo, I have a bit of a prompt for ya. So I’ve seen the “Demon that wants to abduct and forcibly marry Reader,” post(s) and raise a “The local regent/king finds Reader attractive (in a way that he views her almost like a novelty than as a whole person) and offers her a position as a concubine/ ‘palace lady.’” This is a different kind of scenario because straight up murdering the king of the area is not exactly the option that’d let the journey continue smoothly and refusal could also be construed as an offense to the king, but Reader does not want to and needs to continue with them on the journey. All of the other disciples know this, and maybe can tell she’s uncomfortable (even if it’s before Wukong has really fallen for Reader, she is still someone he would consider to be his friend at the very least). How are they going to get out of this one? (Slightly inspired by the time Tripitaka was propositioned in the Kingdom of Women by the Empress.)

Ps: sorry if this is dumb, regardless, I hope you have a good day - 🌺 anon

King: So what do you say, girl? Will you become my concubine? I see no possible reason for you to say no! I can give you all you could ever ask for in exchange for serving my every whim! That seems like a wonderful deal for a woman like you that clearly comes from nothing.

Reader:

Wukong:

Sandy:

Pigsy:

Ao Lie:

Reader: Wha-What?

Tripitaka: N-Now wait just a minute, your Majesty. You c-can't simply expect her to drop everything and stay here-

King: Well of course I can! I am the king of these lands! In fact! I insist upon it! Woman, you shall stay here and serve your new king immediately as soon as you are cleaned.

Reader: *feeling a panic attack approaching as the room starts to spin*

Wukong: *holding back the urge to commit violent murder*

Sandy: *rethinking this whole "pacifism" thing*

Pigsy: *looking disgusted at the king*

Ao Lie: *wondering if anyone would notice if he turned back into a dragon and ate the king*

Tripitaka: *trying so hard to think of a peaceful solution while also trying not to cry over how much the king is objectifying Reader* Y-You can't just h-have her! She's a necessary part of our pilgrimage!

King: By the Heavens! She's just one woman how valuable could she be!? After all, she is just your maidservant is she not!?

Tripitaka: *remembering that is the disguise they came up with for her* Yes, b-but! Why must you have her, great King!?

King: Because I have never seen a woman like her before! She is a beautiful foreign flower that I simply must have for myself! Here! I shall be merciful and send you off with another servant!

King: *gestures to his guards to find a servant*

Wukong: *reaches toward his ear for his staff*

Sandy: *reaches for his spade*

Pigsy: *reaches for his rake*

Ao Lie: *gets ready to turn into a dragon*

Tripitaka: *frozen in shock*

Reader: *sees the carnage about to begin*

Reader: I HAVE A DISEASE!

Everyone: *stops and turns to face her* HUH?!

Reader: I... have a disease.

King: *narrows eyes in suspension* And what is the name of this disease?

Reader: *sweats nervously as all knowledge of every disease she knows of decides to take a vacation from her brain at the one moment she needs it most*

Reader: In... junct... co... itis.... Injunctcoitis.

Everyone:

King: I have never heard of this Injunctcoitis. *turns to the court physician*

Court physician: Neither have I, your Majesty.

Reader: It's a northern disease! From the north! Where I'm from!

King: *looks at court physician*

Court physician: It is possible, your Majesty. *approaches Reader starts inspecting her* And what are the symptoms?

Reader: Oh, w-women don't have any symptoms. *takes a deep breath and composes herself* But for men it makes their dick fall off.

Everyone: IT WHAT!?!?!?!

Reader: Yep! After two months, yo dick just gonna... fall off. And it's a sexually transmitted disease.

King: I can't take any risk of that being true! Get them out of here before this disease spreads to the kingdom!

The Pilgrim Gang: *gets escorted out of the kingdom*

Everyone:

Reader: *sniffles*

The boys: *hugs Reader*

P.S. this so wasn't dumb I had fun writing this 🤭

[pruneunfair]

"My feelings on" part 5. How to get my husband on my side and how it properly tackles abuse, eating disorders, and relationships.

Another super popular manhwa that I can understand why it's so beloved. The Borgias were actual people in history that inspired characters like the protagonist Ruby, and the title itself already feels different since the world of OI is all about being a perfect badass woman, funnily enough, HTGMHOMS does this better than most.

Rudbeckia/Ruby starts off with the behavior of the og fls that a lot of OI make fun of. She is surrounded by what appears to be loving family members and is already being prepped to be married of to Izek, she looks excited and ready to do whatever her family wants until her inner monolog reveals how she really feels about them especially her older brother Cezar. She hates almost all of them and her real reason for being excited for marriage is so she can get away from her abusive household and avoid death which shouldn't be hard since the transmigrator doesn't plan on poisoning her sister in law like og Ruby did. She's a master of hiding her feelings already which is attributed to her past life in a similarly abusive adoptive household.

Right off bat, Ruby is shown to be strong in the mental sense. Not only is she walking on eggshells she also suffers from an ED (likely bulimia), there a quite a few scenes where she's throwing up, refusing to eat a lot, or in later chapters, eating a lot more out of stress. Her family too is whole new level of psychological horror. They aren't cartoonist evil, for example Pope Borgia is usually kind to his daughter and treats her with respect until he feels like she's defying him, all of a sudden that kind caring nature is gone, then he becomes threatening, or her older brother Cezar who has been abusing her for years both physically and sexually, he keeps her in place through fear, intimidation, and attacking her on occasion which is only enhanced after he kills Rubys bird and feeds it to his turtle which gives Ruby a phobia of turtles. It's actually heartbreaking with how eerily realistic it is when these types of people are easily placed like normal family members in certain scenes, because that's often how abusive family members blend in, almost no one knows what they are really like and if you looked at a first glance without context, you'd think "Ah yes, that's just a brother next to his siblings." They're never truly gone, they just know how to hide their true colors so well.

This is why Ruby is so much stronger than a lot of people give her credit for, she's dealing with all of this at the same time and her only hope of respite is being as far as possible from her home country. It's easy to jump to the conclusion that Ruby is just a weak stereotypical protagonist everytime you see her pretend to fawn over Izeks presence but if you read further, you'd know that Ruby doesn't like it any better but she thinks she's doing what's right to avoid Izeks Wrath since she's the only one who knows what he is the one who kills the og Ruby in the novel.

Speaking of which, while Izek isn't my favorite ML ever, I still was shocked to find that I liked the typical cold nobleman persona on him. Unlike a lot of ML's Izek is allowed to be flawed and his negative traits and moments aren't brushed aside, they cause some issues like Ruby going out of her way to appear dainty and sweet so Izek won't kill her. He acknowledges how he has hurt her and grows from it and doesn't push her boundaries. It's possible for the cold Duke archetype to work but a lot of the time, the whole war hero past gets thrown to the side for baseless fan service or they're just unapologetically abusive. Izek however is in the in between. His cold and dangerous persona stays consistent but that doesn't make him one note and he gets to have geninue moments of care for those in his life rendering Izek to still be likeable.

Ive noticed that the narrative also makes sense instead of twisting itself for a stupid chance at a fan service plot. An example is Ellen and Freya.

An unfortunate sideffects from the fandom was on and off hatred of Ellen for considering what Freya had to say, taking her side or not even choosing a side at all. The readers know that Freya tried to get Ruby killed by tricking her into going into a monster infested forest or when she tried to frame Ruby for poisoning her, but does Ellen know that? Realistically she's not going to immediately turn her back on Freya since they were childhood friends along eith Izek but that doesn't mean she screams at Ruby either. Ellen does care about Ruby but she knew Freya longer than she knew Ruby. From her perspective, it' makes sense that Freya would be innocent.

But perhaps the best part about Ellen that makes her my favorite character is how she notices the little details on others. She's the first to find out that Ruby has an eating disorder and it's not out of nowhere either, Ellen and Izeks late mother also suffered from a eating disorder that Ellen witnessed more than once so it gives an explanation on how she can tell what Ruby is going through.

Side characters are treated just as well as the main cast too. From the other guards to the friendly monsters to minor antagonist and even the children are all given attention to be their own beings, it doesn't have to be a lot since most of what I mentioned are minor characters but then you got characters like Ivan who has a life outside of just being by Izeks side.

Out of all the side characters I gotta say the monsters are my favorites. It makes me wish there was a side story where Ruby successfully runs away forever and lives as a little witch with monster companions.

Of course like all media, HTGMHOMS has its flaws but I think I'll chill on this one since the flaws aren't large enough to ruin it and I want to stay positive on something I like for once.

Conclusion: This is a story that does such an amazing job with its commentary. Instead of just saying "Cezar abused Ruby in the past! Feel bad for her now!" For example, we are given actual flashbacks to respect the show don't tell rule. Other characters besides Ruby suffer from their own traumas and they get their own arcs on their hardships and how they recover from it, it handles eating disorders and trauma responses in a respectful way that has an actual effect on the plot. Most of all, it does all of this with the type of protagonist that has been deemed as "weak" before in the manhwa community. Ruby isn't a boss girl who is always successful and smart. She makes reckless decisions, she cries, she isn't always able to one-up her enemies like Freya. She's a human woman stuck in a world that's not her own but she still rises to the task at hand even with all her blunders. Ironically making her more feminist then many of the female leads before her.

[theboyzism]

[ATEEZ] friends with benefits | wooyoung

➳ genre: smut/suggestive, very light angst-ish? (minors dni!) ➳ ficstyle: bulletpoints ➳ pairing: fwb! wooyoung x reader (gn) ➳ warnings: friends with benefits relationship, very slight smut, dirty talk, jealousy, hint of angst pls let me know if there are any missing!

HOW IT STARTED

you knew your bestfriend was an attractive guy

you also became used to the fact that people would stare at wooyoung wherever you'd go out by now

though wooyoung and you hadn't met in a while due to his busy idol life, you still kept up via kakaotalk

and you didn't mind that he didn't even have time to call you most of the time

in fact you were just happy he was living his dream

but as a few months had gone by, you were even more happy that he finally was able to have time for you again

coming back from tour, the first thing he did is spent time with his family

and after returning back to seoul, wooyoung could not wait to meet up with you

just as you were about to leave the door, your friend called you up, asking if you had time to hang out

when you told them that you are getting ready to leave to finally meet up with wooyoung they nearly lost it

"jung wooyoung? i saw a video of him the other day, he went from good looking to straight up hot! he's like stupid hot now, idk how you're so chill around him"

you did what you always did when someone mentioned his good looks: simply just laughed it off

while being reunited with wooyoung felt like heaven

you were also more observant than usual

was it the longer hair?

the more defined arms and collarbones?

why did his throat look so sexy all of a sudden, simply sipping on a drink?

or was it the way he brushed his fingers past his pillow-like lips, small smirk plastered on his lips?

no matter what it was, you came to one major realization:

wooyoung was indeed stupid hot

"hello y/n, are you even listening to me?"

wooyoung had caught you staring a few times, obviously not listening to what came out of his mouth

and surprisingly it didn't bother him that his best friend was basically gobbling him up

no, even more so

he decided to have fun with it

blush crept across your face and you were quick to say that you were listening you just got lost in thoughts

"ah i thought you didn't pay any attention to what i said because you were too busy eye fucking me"

wooyoung was bold, you always knew that, but for some reason you felt the room getting hotter and hotter

you're face must've been completely flushed now, lips parted in shock

"so tell me, what exactly have you been fantasizing about the past few minutes i was talking to you?"

when you were a stuttering mess, trying to put a coherent sentence together, wooyoung let out a chuckle

"you know i can only give you what you want if you talk to me, baby"

you felt yourself getting dizzy the closer he was inching to you, almost like he was intoxicating

and sooner than you could think this through

you hooked up with your bestfriend

HOW IT WENT

there weren't any rules

except for one

he didn't want you to hook up or see someone else while you two were in your friends with benefits situation

he would call you up quite frequently

why do i think he has a high sex drive

he always gave you good after care

but he'd always leave right after

for others nothing much had changed

wooyoung loves physical touch, so nobody thought twice about the way he held you close

what they failed to notice though is where he sometimes would touch

if it was his hand cupping a feel of your butt

or how his hand would slide up your thigh under the table

for everyone else it would be a running joke how he calls you babe in public

and for anyone else it would've been risky how wooyoung was set on hooking up with you in the living room of the dorm, or even the dance practice studio

but for wooyoung it was something more

he loves the risk and thrill of possibly getting caught

secretly he even wanted to get caught

he wanted people to know the dirty things he does to you

HOW IT ENDED

wooyoung was definitely getting a little reckless

stealing kisses every once in a while when no-one was watching just to rile you up

or was it cause he simply couldn't resist you?

anyways, while at a movie night you hosted, your friend turned out to be the first one to catch up on your antics, pulling you aside

when they asked you what's going on with you and wooyoung, you had no other explanation except for the fact that he and your friend themselves got into your head, wooyoung was simply just your best friend

"y/n, i just stated the obvious. he is hot. but best friends don't fuck each other just because, especially with the way he's eyeing you the whole time"

and that was enough to send you into a spiral

fuck, did you have feelings for your best friend?

did he have feelings for you?

just looking at him made your heart do flips

wooyoung was excitedly patting the spot next to him, waiting for you to sit down again

swallowing the lump in your throat you decided it was a good time to get some space between you two, making your way over to sit next to yunho instead

the whole time you could feel wooyoung eyes staring while you tried to keep your eyes on the screen, occasionally laughing at the jokes yunho was telling you

while you didn't care about yunho's friendly nature and close proximity, wooyoung certainly did

you mentally cursed yourself when wooyoung was the one who insisted to stay behind to help you clean up

the two of you were engulfed in an awkward silence while doing the dishes

until his voice finally cut through the silence

"so what was the whole thing with yunho? do you like him or something?"

"what makes you think that?" you couldn't look at him, the spot on the plate being long gone, but you were still scrubbing it

wooyoung's hand sneaked on yours, making you stop, so he could finally take the clean plate from your hands and putting it down next to the sink

"well maybe cause you ignored me for him" he was starting to grow a little annoyed

there is one thing you learnt about wooyoung from all the time you've been friends

which was that when he got to a certain point, he was like a volcano waiting to bubble over any second now

before you could get a word out, wooyoung raised his voice a little

"wow, are you that desperate that you have to move to the next best person that shows any interest in you? and now you can't even say anything to defend yourself? is it because he's taller than me?"

you knew he was trying to hit where it hurts, and sadly it was working

"wooyoung, are you in love with me?"

when he snickered you could feel your heart break a little

"me in love with you? you're just my best friend, nothing more"

seeing your hurt expression instantly made him regret his harsh words

the way your heart broke made your thoughts race

he didn't love you

but you definitely had some sort of feelings for him

"i think you should leave, we both need some time apart" you saw him role his eyes at your words

for some reason you expected him to put up some sort of fight for you

but he didn't

he only agreed with your words and left, which was the last time you had heard from him in over a month

while you were ready to move on

he was surely not

too engulfed in his little jealousy outburst to realize his feelings from the beginning

just like it did for you when he was gone on tour,

distance truly made his heart grow fonder

[justchillandshipit]

I have so much I want to post about, but I don't want to overload my own dashboard. I'm going to try and fit all of this into one post. I'm tagging this post as potential spoilers, but really these are part of fan theories. I'm throwing spoilers in there because if by some crazy thing, any of it happens to be right, I don't want to ruin it for others. However, a theory is just a theory, so let's suspend disbelief and dig into this one.

Most of you probably have heard or read some of these fan theories. One is that episode one or two is some sort of coma-induced alternate reality. There is a photo floating around somewhere that has the fire engine labeled 119 instead of 118. There is the mustache. etc. Someone pointed out, in the photo above, that the man on the magazine cover is Ryan Guzman but manipulated in some way. I would like to take it a step further. I looked at all the headlines and noticed that the one that likely matches with the manipulated photo says, "From a bedroom to an Empire." Is this a reference to a former porn star now running some sort of empire? (Bahahaha. if the manipulated photo is Ryan G. what a great play on the pornstache he is sporting.) I love it.

Anyway, if Eddie was stung by a bee and had a coma-induced alternate-reality dream, I love that he has reimagined himself in this way. It's a great nod. Another fan theory is that Eddie dreams he chose Chicago over LA. (but since it is not real, Buck, Chim, Hen, and the gang would all still be there, but they all live in Chicago instead.) I like the Chicago idea because it would allow them to do that crossover with Abbot Elementary (which is one of the shows that a cast member said they would love to do a crossover with.) It is a comedy show so it would lend itself to a comedic alternate reality episode.

The possibilities and directions they could take in this type of episode are broad, but I'm hoping for either an Eddie realization moment or for a planting of the seed in his head moment. (If I were writing it, I would do it like this.) In this reality, Buck and Eddie are already 'Buddie,' so after a day of work or whatever Buck could possibly drive Eddie home, but then not leave. Eddie isn't too concerned because Buck has practically wrapped himself around Eddie's neck since everything went down with Chris. However, later when Eddie is lying quietly in bed the covers shift and Buck gets in bed with him. Eddie jumps and flounders around for the light, and Buck just says, "Sorry. I was trying not to wake you." He finishes crawling under the covers and cuddles close to Eddie. Eddie is shocked and frozen to the spot. Buck doesn't notice. He just says, "Hit the light Papi... unless... you're not feeling tired." And gives Eddie that look that says, "Are you ready for it." AND it brings

THIS energy.

[Small break to apologize for the Papi line. I do not like the whole Daddy thing. I don't kink shame, but the Daddy thing is not for me. That said. Papi just HITS differently. I can't explain it forgive me.]

Also, here is a photo of Buck in the alternate reality. (Again, if I were writing it, I would let the tattoos stay. I would also let him speak with his real accent.) Bonus, if I were writing it, at the end of the episode when Eddie is back to himself, he may not admit to Buddie right away, but he would ask Buck to speak with an accent. Buck thinks it's a weird request, but he does it. However, he does it with the worst possible British accent you can imagine. Like Gandalf chewing marbles. Eddie stops him and tells him to never do it again, so we are back to Buck's American accent. lol

Oh, and here is that "if you aren't tired expression" I was referring to earlier when he asked if Papi was tired or not.

This post is so long, and I haven't even touched on the theory of Eddie having a hurt arm or hand... A few weeks ago, Ryan G. said something about, "when you have to fight one-handed." So he hurt his hand and is still so mad, that he's trying to fight with just one... Lawd, help me.

While I still maintain that I do not hate that Tommy guy, I am so down with a jealous Eddie fighting him because he thinks that Tommy has somehow hurt Buck. Equally okay, with Eddie punching Gerard and hurting his hand.

Edit and reblog because I have one more thing to add. If I were writing it, and if this is actually one of Oliver S.'s tattoos. I would 100% make sure this tattoo got screen time, and regardless of the real meaning of the tattoo. For an alternate reality Buck, THIS WAS his aha moment.

[lesbianloml]

the beginning

my babysitter au

type of piece(s): imagine, oneshot, drabble, series

type(s) of writing: smut, angst, fluff, dark (the story will contain all of the above)

pairing(s): milf!dom!dark!wanda maximoff x innocent!sub!immune!witch!fem!reader

warning(s): legal age gap (wanda is 33, reader is 21), perverted men, mentions of sex, this is just where they meet so nothing big

summary: when wanda hires a new babysitter, she is shocked to find that there are some things she doesn't know about her town. the biggest shock is you, you are immune to wanda's powers. an even bigger shock comes when wanda finds out you have powers of your own.

a/n: this series is going to be LOOSLY based on my wandavision dr. if anyone has anything they would like to see or something, let me know. and if anyone wants to talk about shifting, hit me up. i kinda imagined reader as a soft and quiet girl. also, you're kinda a whore. and you love to read and bake. in this series, wanda doesn't really do a tv show or different eras, it's all just normal. but the agents and stuff outside the hex have a big part. reader works at the local café that she owns and spends most of her free time in the library. anyways, enjoy part one!

1.8k words

(not my pics)

(pretend she had billy and tommy before the hex)

"what's the name for your order?" you asked, a little annoyed. you loved your job, but the older man standing in front of you made you want to throw your apron down and quit. "cohen, babe. don't forget next time" cohen shoots you a wink. you hold back a gag as you try to smile politely, writing the name on the side of the cup and turning your back to begin making the drink. grabbing a bag from behind you, you set the cinnamon pastry you made a few hours prior into a container and set it in the bag. as quick as you can, you mix up his drink and slap a lid on it while rolling up the top of the bag, wanting him to leave as soon as possible. "here you go" you say, spinning around and handing the bag and the drink to him. he gives you a look and opens his mouth to speak, but before he can, you tap the counter three times swiftly. your work best friend, sophie comes around from the back. "hey babe! is he causing you trouble?" cohen glares harshly at sophie, but one thing you love about her is the way she doesn't back down. sophie gives him a look that immediately has cohen scurrying out the door, tail between his legs. "thanks soph" "anytime love. we get off in fifteen, where you going tonight? your apartment or your mom's house?" you look around to see an empty café, emptier than usual. usually, the shop is packed full of starved or thirsty customers. but it's dark outside, and who would come get caffeine and food at 9:45 at night?

"I'll just stop by the library real quick before it closes and then head home and watch a movie or something." you say, smiling as you think about the old library downtown. it was your favorite place to be whenever you had free time or just needed some quiet. you turn and stacked some more cups and filled up the napkin container while waiting for your shift to end or another customer to walk in. you hear soph come out from the back room, where she was restocking supplies. "hey girl, can i ask a favor?" "yeah i'll stay and lock up so you can go fuck shawn" you say with a smirk and a giggle. sophie gasps dramatically. "how'd you know what i was gonna ask?" "because you ask me at least once a week. and the fact that you're a year older than me and supposed to be more mature makes it even funnier" "thank you! i'll see you tomorrow. don't forget, on sunday night we're baking treats for the elementary school bake sale on monday." "got it. i love you. see you sunday. enjoy shawn!" you sing as sophie laughs. "i will. love you too." "today is friday so on sunday, i need to be here by 5:00am so i can set up the tables and stuff to be ready to open at 6:00am. then i'll work until 10:00pm, close up, and help sophie bake some treats for monday's bake sale at the elementary school" you plan your day tomorrow in your head. glancing at the clock, you see it reads 9:55pm. 5 more minutes until you can lock up and leave. you work on monday, wednesday, friday, and sunday from 5:00am to 10:30pm. you usually open at 6:00am and close at 10:00pm 4/7 days a week. you love your job but hate the hours. your job at the coffee shop payed extremely well, so no matter how much you hated waking up before the sun, you weren't going to quit. you grab a rag and wipe the counters down. 3 minutes until you lock up and leave.

you spin around when you hear the little bell above the shop door ding, signaling someone came in. you almost drop the damp rag you're holding when you see her, a women, maybe in her early thirties. she had beautiful red hair and striking green eyes. her clothes were casual and relaxed, but you were sure she was some sort of powerful figure from the way she walked and held herself. you had never seen her in westview before, you were sure you'd remember her, and you'd lived in westview since you were eighteen, so three years now. you shake your head before walking around the counter to greet the women. she's even prettier up close. "you came in at the perfect time. i was just about to lock up." you tell the women with a smile. "oh, i can leave if you're closed-" before the women starts apologizing, you cut her off. "oh no, it's ok. i don't mind, i was getting lonely in here anyways. what can i get for you tonight?" "just a coffee and a piece of apple pie, please" you nod and turn to make her order. you don't ask her name, too shy to do so. it's a good thing that this women isn't. "i'm wanda." "y/n. i don't remember seeing you around westview. did you just move here?" you ask, sliding her drink and bag with the pie in the container to her over the counter. "no, we haven't moved here yet. i was just looking around, getting ready to move in with my boys" "oh, you have kids? how old?" "i have twin boys. they're ten" wanda's face lights up when she talks about them. "cute! i guess i'll be seeing you around more if you're going to move here" "you sure will, sweetheart." you wonder what that's supposed to mean as wanda smiles at you before paying and exiting the café, leaving a trail of perfume in her wake.

wanda turns the wheel to the left, not really knowing what she's looking for, but knows she's looking for something. wanda reminds herself that she needs to head back to the hotel and rest up for tomorrow when she and her boys were going to move into their new home. ever since vision kicked them out, they've been staying in a hotel but then wanda remembered the house that she owned in westview. the perfect place for her and her boys to start over. as wanda is thinking, her head droops and stomach grumbles. she hasn't drank or eaten anything all day. wanda continues driving around the streets, looking for a restaurant or something that she could get a bite to eat at. wanda slows the car when she sees a little café on the corner, letting out a sigh of relief as she sees movement and light from inside. she wouldn't have made it the forty five minutes back to the hotel without eating something. she quickly climbs out of her car and enters the café, not really paying attention to who's there with her. wanda just wants to get back as soon as she can. "you came in at the perfect time. i was just about to lock up" wanda almost falls over at the sound of the other female's voice. it was so relaxing and quiet. so beautiful. she glances up to look and sees you. wanda swears she stops breathing for a moment. you were the most gorgeous thing she'd ever seen. with the prettiest smile, even at the disturbance, and the softest voice, wanda swore she just met an angel. you had to be an angel. you're smiling. at her. "oh, i can leave if you're closed-" "oh no. it's ok. i don't mind, i was getting lonely in here anyways. what can i get for you tonight?" you were so sweet, so kind. "just a coffee and a slice of apple pie, please" wanda smirks to herself when she sees the tint of blush on your cheeks. you were so cute, too shy to talk to her or ask her name. "i'm wanda" "y/n. i don't remember seeing you around westview. did you just move here?" wanda watches you slide the bag and coffee across the counter towards her. "no, we haven't moved here yet. i was just looking around, getting ready to move in with my boys" wanda states. "oh, you have kids? how old?" "i have twin boys. they're ten" she smiles at the thought of her boys. "cute! i guess i'll be seeing you around more if you're going to move here" "you sure will, sweetheart."

as wanda clambers into her car to begin the drive home, she thinks about the girl at the counter. "y/n" wanda thinks to herself, smiling at the name. she thinks it suits you. and as wanda is turning onto the freeway, she thinks to herself, "that girl will be mine"

as you lock up the café and slide into your car, you think about the women you saw. she was very pretty, and you hope that her and her kids move in ok. as you turn you car on and pull out of the parking lot, you rest your hands on the wheel as you begin driving home. your mind is pleasantly empty on the drive back to your apartment.

the first time wanda ever met you, wanda thought about you the entire drive back to the hotel. you were the most angelic person she'd ever met, and she was enchanted by you. the first time that you met wanda, you thought about her once before driving home. she was just another customer to you. but little did you know, you were becoming so much more to her.

little do you know, this is just the beginning

[g1rlken]

Fleetest Melancholies 4.

Alex turner x ex!fem actress reader

read part 1-4 (pinned)

word count: 3.9k+

Summary: the confused apologetic angsty aftermath of Alex and his past lover falling asleep together causes an even more angsty reaction but yearning for the win this one is toooo cute in the end

Warning: cuss words, angst, proofreading later

As the dawn broke the setting felt rather unfamiliarly pleasant. Comfort of last night’s events seeping in as y/n arose out of her sleep with the soft white light of the day cracking in through the windows. A grey day like always of the grassland, no sun in sight just the monotone clouds filling in white in place of the gold of sun. With the casual accepted absence of sun y/n was also reminded of someone else’s absence in her bed.

Her eyes held the exhaust of all the crying she had done yesterday and the act of crying herself to sleep however she remembered more than just crying to sleep. Then recalled the arms that held her when she did so, Alex who as starkly absent as of now. It wasn’t even that late in the morning yet, seeing the disheveled bedsheets beside her and the extra pillows which spoke that someone had been there y/n still had to think harder to perfectly recollect if Alex was actually there. The entire scene came back to her bit by bit, slow and profoundly comforting even after everything. Yet she still doubted if it was a dream or if she actually lived through that. Can’t be a dream can it? She could still feel the warmth of his embrace, she could remember what he said.

She quickly took the covers off of her, getting out of the bed in a few strides she reached the bathroom of her hotel room, Alex wasn’t there. Shrill disappointment was creeping in, making her doubt the truth she had lived through. Running her hands through her hair she came back to the bedside area, finding Alex’s jacket draped over the armchair. Oh. She wasn’t deluded. There was a trace of him and what she remembered happening. Intimate in the most saddest way and in the morning he was gone. What a wretched scene in retrospect, she felt hugely embarrassed with herself. The fact that she broke down in front of him only for him to run away.

There was a small voice in her head of humiliating optimism which told her reasonings for Alex’s absence. Perhaps something urgent came up, so that he headed to leave without as much as a word. No text on her phone either, with such heavy disappointment weighing on her she got ready for the day. Attending the hotel breakfast in the hopes of running into Alex otherwise after yesterday’s scene she was to avoid the crew as much as possible.

Expectant eyes searching for Alex in the dining hall during breakfast and she saw almost everyone but him. “Morning!” Richard exclaimed as soon as he spotted here there, sounded casually cheery but still a lot for the actress. “Sleep well?”

“Yeah” y/n said with a small huff at the irony of it, she must’ve had the best sleep last night if only she were in a probable state to comprehend that serenity.

“I have a good news!” He said as he tagged along with her to the nearest table. Seemingly excited to tell her whatever it was.

Correlating his excitement to some advancement in the editing clip or maybe the location, “what is it?” she asked.

“Alex left.” He informed her with a dramatic sigh of relief, after the misery scenario yesterday, what one would consider highly unprofessional. Alex may have left out of embarrassment or to save his face, which is what Richard inferred. But whatever his reason he knew that shooting would be so much easier since they didn’t have a salty man killing everyone’s vibe.

“What?!” She nearly yelled and lowered the shock in her voice, “what? What do you mean?” She asked in a more supposedly composed voice but the horror was evident on her face.

Richard was left so confused with her reaction because he assumed she would be the most delighted with this news, “yeah he went back, first flight this morning.”

“Oh he went back?! All the way back?” The disappointment seeping into her voice was so intense, superficially processing the situation she felt somewhat hurt.

“Why are you acting weird about it? You wanted him gone since your first day here.” Richard added, a sense of exaggerated dread in his tone as he tried to go back to hers.

Extremely engulfed in disappointment the actress didn’t even try to hide it, for a second she felt like being hit by a truck. “He left without a word” she muttered, referring to herself.

“No, he told me he was leaving. Keep him in the loop for the rest of the video and stuff” Richard said relaying the conversation of Alex not leaving without a word but he couldn’t understand why that would bother her. After what happened yesterday he’d assume y/n would want no words from the man. “What’s going on?”

She calculated for a second whether she should enlighten him about what happened or not. Probably shouldn’t, it’s over sharing and borderline non professional but again Richard was a close friend and she was in the thickest of feelings right now. “We slept together last night.”

The colour from his face drained, Richard’s eyes widened and brows raised as he tried to digest that information, “Were you not provided enough oxygen during your formative years as a baby or are you somewhat insane?!” As her friend, he couldn’t accept this at all. How could she just let the man walk all over her twice in the same week in two different ways. “I am going to strangle you-“

“No no Richard no-listen” she interrupted the burst of shock and rage in him instantly “It’s not—wait I phrased it wrong. We didn’t sleep together, we just slept together. Co-sleeping if you will.”

As he adhered that Richard was somehow even more irked, “What the fuck? What did you have to do that for?”

“He came to my room to apologise, for yesterday and I was crying and it was messy, we didn’t even kiss I promise he just held me and we fell asleep.” She explained herself how you would to an extremely conservative parent “And in the morning he was gone but he left his jacket.”

“Wow…” Richard had to take the whole scene in with a deep sigh escaping him. It sounded more like a hostage situation to him than a souvenir but he wouldn’t say that to his friend at this very moment given her fragile mindset towards the situation. “Somehow that’s kind of worse? You didn’t fuck him and yet you got fucked.”

“Richard” she said joining her brows together and said that in a jarring tone “it’s not that bad! I’m not fucked, he just purposely left his jacket for reasons unknown and it’s somewhat unsettling to feel—“

“You are fucked.” Richard said shaking his head and took a huge sip of his water, he had to down this information with something “the worst kind of fucking, like with an invisible dick, a metaphorical gigantic-“

“I get it!” She exclaimed stopping him from relaying more examples on her to compare how badly she was supposedly ‘fucked’.

“How do you feel about his jacket?” He proposed elbows on the table, several ways to look at this situation and he was getting more interested.

“Entertained.” She joked with a little giggle at her own joke which did not seem to land well enough with her friend.

Nudging her elbow in a rather forceful way to throw down sense onto her, “Idiot!”

“He could have also forgotten it there…” trailing off she feigned a wondrous look as though that could be true.

“Forgot?” Richard scoffed “everybody knows Alex is not random nor forgetful with his jacket or his girl.”

“I’m not his girl.” She corrected him and expressed a disapproving sentiment to that statement.

“Said the girl who slept with him and didn’t even fuck hi-“

“Alright that’s enough.” She stood up from her place to leave and get ready for the day given the conversation was getting to the point where she didn’t like to be retold facts to.

—

A week and no text. A month snd no reach out. Agonising, awful stack of days just endlessly awaiting something that couldn’t be put into words or even in thoughts. She was hoping Alex reaches out, perhaps for his jacket, perhaps for that night, perhaps for it all. Why would he though? When did it even become such big of a deal? He just apologised for being a jerk and held her to sleep. There was no telling if he did or did not leave before morning.

But he left his jacket.

The godforsaken jacket held so much hope for a sinking ship, it was becoming an ordeal. Blaming herself for walking all over everything they had she did not deserve the fragment of this want. Felt like a freak trying to get a scent of him through his jacket so she ran it through her washer once and shoved it in her cupboard with the pile of other stuff she had out for donating to goodwill. He did not reach out for his jacket, but that was just a way she wished he’d re-enter her life. But he did not and she could not so this will be the end of it.

Or so she thought, she had bailed from the music video screening. Even though her best of friends from the team and people she had worked with for years would be present she bailed saying she had come down with fever so she would not come across Alex. She had promised herself to make this the end of it otherwise neither could move forward in any sense, rebuilding the same roof in the same rain, making their place flood again and again. There was more a plight to their situation given she wasn’t fully clear as to what she wanted in retrospect. Being better now than she was yesterday did not equate to being proper or well enough. Adding Alex to her routine of hyper fixated meals, he would change that, he would make her try something new everyday. Off of the anti depressants she would face thorough evaluation through him like she were a test subject and he did everything out of so much love she couldn’t risk being suffocated again. Even if he promised to not do that, it was her biggest fear she would fall down the same spiral again and he would be there to witness those pieces.

Packing up for the day as she put her dishes in the sink the doorbell surprised her, this hour? As she reached to open the door, confetti blew in her face throwing her off and it was Richard and all her friends on their team. “You thought we’d just let you have a pyjama party of one if you didn’t show up to the screening?” Richard exclaimed and hugged her as everyone came in, commenting her praises for her work in the music video, basically they had all just transformed her place into a mini party get together so she could be included in the celebration.

“Thank you so much!” She hugged Richard again after receiving everyone’s greetings. There was an unsaid understanding between Richard and her that she purposefully didn’t attend the screening because of Alex.

“Don’t mention it!” He said, Richard would be damned if his best friend missed a celebration of her fine work for her ex so he brought the party here.

“So then this is an after party right?” One of the friends asked as everyone was settling into her apartment, it was a spacious place and not that many people anyways.

“Absolutely!” Exclaiming, rejoiced with the inclusion and idea of not missing the party even if she were in her pyjamas. Room full of people she loved for friends and colleagues, couldn’t be a better place to live through.

“This could also be called a double party because of her nomination!” Ella said as she was settling the food and beverages they’d set into plates by y/n’s kitchen counter.

“Golden globes baby!” Another one said with enthusiasm and the cheers went on and on again. She wasn’t going to attend nor win and she did not have the heart in herself to tell them that and create a pity party in here so she just rejected that thought and embraced everyone’s congratulations like she would have two years ago.

As the night went on, someone was pinged as to location of the after party and they invited as it is. “Yeah I’ll just text you” was the phone conversation. “Wait we need you pick up some more snacks and drinks on your way here, text you that as well—Bye Alex”

The name alarmed both Richard and y/n at the same time, no way he was actually going to go through it. A silent understanding through nods to the side and both of them stood up and met at the quiet corner, “it had to be some other Alex right?”

“Not at this party I don’t think so” Richard said in a hushed tone seeming to appear collected, at least on the outside. “He has to know you live here right?”

“You think he will ditch it if he knows that?” Y/n questioned and as much of a coin toss decision maker Alex was he was also extremely unpredictable to foresee his actions.

“He has to?” Reached asked, it wasn’t a mutual break up and since she lived with him before this, he had to at least know how well settled or safe she was in with her new place. Not in the context of today’s situation but back when they broke up Alex wouldn’t grow un-protective over night now would he?

“I think my dad told him at some point” she shrugged thinking it all through with the possible chances of Alex actually showing up.

“Your dad?” Puzzled her friend was somewhat taken aback.

“Yeah they kind of kept in touch or something but Alex has never showed up at this place” there was little to no faith in her reaction of Alex did or did not show up because both were rather a heartache to reflect upon.

“Look it’s already late if he would get here it would be half an hour maximum” Richard tried to bring the time angle into the ordeal.

“I could just hide in the bathroom till then” The idea popped up and seemed extremely well thought and a great idea to her, confrontations were awful.

“You can’t be serious-“ even before Richard finished that sentence the frantic lady was out of his sight.

Despite their poor judgement and better hopes Alex did show up at the ‘after party’. Small smile, life or the party fitted in almost perfectly. There was no room Alex Turner would walk in and feel out of place. He camouflaged in social circles like wallpaper on matching paint. So, naturally the habituated wallflower was on the hide out until everyone or at least Alex left. Richard kept on giving him timely updates in the same 40 or so minutes everyone had before wrapping up.

When the knock on the bathroom door wasn’t signature Richard knock she assumed everyone had left, as for others who did have to use one there was another one down the hall. Leaning off the sink she opened the door to meet with Alex, her lips pursed and colour in face nearly drained. “Alex-!”

“You…” he trailed off in no hurry to make way inside or move past to let her out. Alex didn’t seem as phased or as awkward she did with the sudden encounter. “I didn’t expect to not see you here at all, here you are”

“Funny” she spoke trying to hold to her wits and maintain as collected sense in her tone as possible.

“Very funny considering this is your house” he pointed out, leaving no escape of conversation for her. Dragging her away from awkward ordeal she considered this interaction to be.

“Yeah I just-I had to throw up” she told him the closest accordant story that came to her mind on spot. “I’m somewhat sick”

“But didn’t you say you had the flu?” He questioned, both of them still at the entrance of her bathroom and Alex was rather comfortable leaning against the wall.

Was he keeping tabs on her? “It’s a sort of evolutionary flu.” There was full confidence stretched in her voice with little to no mistrust in her lie. At least for her.

Alex saw right through her and he made no effort to not let it show, “Evolutionary flu is it?” He scoffed.

“Didn’t you want to go?” She moved out of his way and with difficult past him where he leant on the doorframe, he didn’t even move as she made past him the proximity for the smallest of fragment made the interaction rather tense, for her.

“Ah no I just wanted to check out the place” he shrugged and uncrossed his arms leaning off of the doorframe, he could tell she was somewhere between blushed and unnerved. “Wasn’t invited to the housewarming party.”

“—There was no housewarming party.”

“Yes there was” he said affirmatively, not in a sense of correcting her but in a more tone, “Your dad told me.” Alex had no shame in flaunting his ever unchanging likeness that her father had developed for him.

“Oh of course” She scoffed and wanted to roll her eyes at him but did not want him to make more a scene out of the situation, “Not weird at all!” Something about the fact that he kept tabs on her life through her dad eased and crossed her at the same time.

“It is not his fault he didn’t break up with me and erased me out of existence” He taunted, never subtle. She moved past him with a wince at that taunt, he followed her back to the empty living room.

Seemingly everyone had left, “Don’t, alright. Don’t.” She huffed occupying herself with trying to tidy up the living room so that she wouldn’t have to look him in the eye.

“You never called.” He reopened the conversation they were supposed to have when he was ‘bullying her’, the conversation they were supposed to have the morning he left behind only a trace of him being his jacket.

“You never called.” She emphasised on ‘you’ but their timelines of referring to calling each other were completely different. It didn’t take her to specify that for him to understand when she was referring to.

“You asked me to leave” Alex stood his ground taking small steps around her as she paced about to instantly clean the whole space, the determination seemed as if she wanted to clean the place off him too.

“And you left!” She exclaimed in frustration as she put the stack empty glasses back on the coffee table, the action matching up to her frustration.

Alex was now finally meeting her eyes and his confusion was evident, “I did what you wanted! You are making no sense…” he trailed off with a sigh.

“You know exactly what I am referring to, I asked you to leave when you humiliated me in front of everyone, when you bullied me the entire process of the shoot but then you came to my room and apologised and soothed and held me to sleep and the next day you were gone without a word!” She let out all her anguish in poorly put together words.

“I left my jacket so you would reach out!” Alex exclaimed standing his ground, he knew it was unconventional to leave something non-sentient behind in the most sentient parts of their relationship but it wasn’t traceless or out of no thought. “I wanted you to reach out on your own terms I left how you wanted me to, out of your workspace and I regret what I did during the process I really do, it was immature and selfish again I’m really sorry. But you cannot pin it on me that I didn’t call.”

“You are here to pin it on me then?” She asked, even though his words made sense and his valid reaction seemed more than valid she didn’t want to pan it out as understandable because it wasn’t.

Alex stared at her, a silent contemplation in his head as he let a beat pass “I am here to tell you that I am still in love with you.” He said as if the simplest fact, “I had to let you know and I had to see you, I knew you didn’t attend the screening party on purpose how you didn’t reach out for the jacket just how you didn’t reach out after our break up and that was difficult.”

“No no no no-“ she shook her head inhaling a sharp breath, looking around once again feeling cornered in the big living room. “No you can’t just-“ it was too simple for him to admit that, too simple to say it out loud and expect her to digest. She made her way out of the coffee table passage and he followed the movement.

“ I can’t what?” Alex inquired even though he knew what she was trying to convey. He gently took her hands into his trying to steady her from moving around, also the feel of her fingers within his.

“We can’t do this again” She told him shaking her head, somewhat afraid to meet his eyes with those heavy tides of optimism and hope of rekindling hazardous flames.

“Why not?” Hesitantly he took a step forward but she didn’t pull away. Accessing him to further lean a bit to force her to meet his gaze.

“Alex” speechless as she met his eyes, inhaling sharply she paused. Gently placing her hands intertwined with his onto his chest faintly clutching his shirt as he got closer to her, hypnotised under his gaze as the tension around them seemed to spring away.

Alex could feel time slow down, he felt a softer hand at life with his intertwined in hers. A strange serenity of gentle adrenaline rush coursing through him when he followed her eyesight down to her lips, “maybe we are going too far” she said softly a voice barely above whisper.

Unmoved from his stance or gaze he asked, “we are not going anywhere” fixing a loose strand of hair on her face he mirrored her gentle tone. “This is exactly where I want to be”

“How do you find it in yourself…?” She questioned in the weight of a curious moment of heavy certainties. “To still love me, after everything?”

“Because of what I find in you. You have a fascinating mind and a gentle heart which holds mine as much as yours—even a difficult moment with you is the one I recall every moment until I see you again. I’m accustomed to loving you, you don’t need to feel the same but on most days loving you is all I know-“ before Alex could conclude his answer y/n crashed her lips onto his and he continued the answer within the kiss of same, if not more intensity. Wrapping his arms around her pulling her even impossibly closer. The embrace he’d reminisced this entire time was back to him.

—

Sorry for late update let me know if you want to be tagged for other parts! Drink water ILY

Next part is crazy and angst is on fire pls don’t kill me

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