#also. i've been trying to think of a selfship name

[mydream-synopsis]

good morning to togame jo as i tenderly brush my fingers through his bedhead. he's still asleep but i can't help admire his gentle face: his lips are lightly curled into a content smile, his eyelashes framing the slope of his eyes, and his breaths are slow and still in a deep slumber.

i take a chance and delicately cradle his face in my hands - he's still very much asleep. mindlessly stroking his cheek, i feel an arm wrap around my waist all of a sudden, entertaining a yelp from my mouth. togame's embrace is warm and snug, as i now find myself buried into his chest - so close that i can feel his heartbeat echo in my ears. togame's hands now rest on me, one on my head lightly ruffling my hair, and the other around my back.

what i don't see is togame's smile, now wider than before (maybe he was awake this whole time).

[two-person-job]

Sooooo, how are things with Yoimiyaaa?

herhehrwehrer..

we're doing good!! during my break my mental health was at it's lowest for a while, but honestly selfshipping helped me feel better <33

today I had a poptart that I used the dinosaur sandwich maker on and I thought "yoimiya would like this.." (I did too bAHAHAH)

she misses u btw

[kenslilove]

᯽៰ ͘ ࣭⸰ 𖥔 ͙ࣳ Who’s Little Sister?! Pt.2

preview: You called him your boyfriend? Why would you do that? Draken isn't sure he's cut out to be the boyfriend to Takemichi's precious little sister...

ft. Ken "Draken" Ryuuguji x fem!reader

wc. 9kish... help 🫠🤪😰😵‍💫🥴🤡

W. NFSW 18+ MINORS DNI, age gap (Draken is in his late 20’s and owns the bike shop, reader is in their early 20’s in university), fem reader (takemichi’s little sister), crybaby/bimbo reader, angsty in the middle, Draken is very insecure of his ability to be in a relationship, slight exhibitionism (Draken fucks you while on call), multiple cream pies, messy make-outs, oral (m!receiving), mating press, squirting, lots of praise, aftercare, lots of pet names, it gets soft and passionate at the end 🥹🥹

an. The long-awaited part 2 of “Who’s Little Sister.” I put my heart, soul, and pussy into this piece. I think it's my favourite thing I've ever written in all honesty, it very much encapsulates how I think Draken’s and I’s relationship would start. God, I love him so much. It’s also the first time I've written anything remotely angsty though, and I can’t tell if it's lame or not LMFAO. Please, let me know what you think. I'm so very happy to be reposting this piece on this blog to share with yall, it’s literally so important to me <33 and I’m so so happy this is the fic that is bringing back my writing spark! Part 3 will hopefully be even better than this 🙏🏼🤭 Constructive feedback, comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated. 

extra note: Listen to “Nothings gonna hurt you baby.” By Cigarettes After Sex during the last scene. It’s Kenny’s and I’s selfship song and help inspired me for the ending <33

tagging: @enchantedforest-network @eveningatthemoviesnetwork and @shoyosdoll bc you've been such a supporter of this fic hehe <33 i hope you love part 2 as much as part 1 <33

“Draken-Kun, are you coming tonight?” 

There was silence on Draken’s end of the phone as all the other males on-call waited for a response. Mikey was the first one to say something back, annoyance clear in his tone as he spoke directly into the receiver, making his voice sound much louder than necessary. 

“Oi, Ken-Chin, get off the phone if you’re just gonna ignore us.” 

“Sorry–” Draken finally responded, his voice seeming just a bit more… strained than usual. Not enough for the boys to notice until he grunted softly, what seemed to be creaking or something muffled in the background of his audio call. 

“You good, dude?” Mitsuya piped up, his own voice a little muffled due to a sewing needle between his lips but nothing like Draken’s. 

“Oh yea, fuckin peachy–” Draken breathed in response, his huff coming out as a soft laugh when a bit of sweat started to roll down his temple. 

If he was being honest, he wasn’t really paying attention to the call, how could he, when you, Takemichi’s precious little sister was underneath him, sprawled out and trembled as his cock drilled into you at a steady pace. You were biting down on your bottom lip so hard, Draken swore that blood would free itself soon from the delicate flesh, your eyes screwed shut as your pretty chest bounced with each thrust of his hips. You were trying so hard for him to be quiet, just like he instructed as soon as he picked up the phone. The attempt was adorable, considering how vocal you usually were for him. 

But Draken was twisted, he knew that deep down, so he just couldn’t help himself when he angled his hips just right so his cock head would jab right into that gummy sweet spot within your walls. You yelped, pleasure shooting up your spine, only for the sound to be cut off by the smack of Draken’s free palm clamping over your mouth. 

“Who has a girl over~?” Baji piped up, suddenly very much interested in the conversation. Draken laughed shallowly into his receiver, his hand tightening up along your jaw as he continued to ram into the spot that made you see stars. You couldn’t even control your babbles when he did this, an endless stream of whimpers and sobs being muffled into his palm as you held onto his wrist for dear life. 

“Gotta go, Text me what time I needa be there–” Draken didn’t wait for a response from his friends. Instead, he hung up quickly, abandoning the device somewhere on the bed. When he released the hold on your mouth you whined at him, the tears finally spilling from your eyes. 

“K-Kenny, Kenny please– Please–!” 

“So fuckin loud pretty, all the damn time,” Draken says it with a grin, easily manhandling your thighs over his shoulders so he can fuck into you deeper. He presses a kiss to your ankle, right beside the anklet he bought you as your pussy flutters so desperately around his cock. 

“O-Oh! Please, Ken–!”

“Please what?” Draken grunts, his hips slapping up against yours ruthlessly now as his release comes dangerously close. He knew you weren’t far behind. Had learned your signs very early on. Your toes would curl, your eyes would get foggy, chest stuttering. Your pussy would milk him so tight and leave rings of arousal on his cock. 

And he loved every second of it. 

“Wanna cum, needa cum again–!” you pleaded with him, nails digging into the muscles of his flexing biceps. He nodded in agreement, his own voice becoming hoarse due to the sheer squeeze of your pussy. Although his pace started to get sloppy he still fucked into you, one hand slithering between your sweaty bodies in order to massage ruthlessly at your clit. 

“Go on then, cum, make a fuckin mess f’me gorgeous.” He breathes, licking his lips when you throw your head back with a cry. The mess you make on his cock is breathtaking, arousal squirting from your used hole and dousing his hand, wrist and abs. He swears under his breath at the borderline painful grip your pussy has on his cock when you finish, one final thrust allowing him to spill ropes of cum right up against your cervix. 

Draken’s trembling when he falls onto his elbows over you, his breath coming out a bit shaky as his cock still twitches within your walls in the aftermath of both of your highs. He starts pressing wet, opened-mouthed kisses along your neck and face to help you come too, a soft chuckle leaving his lips when you whine softly. 

“You okay baby?” His voice is a whisper, and as the energy slowly comes back to you he smooths his palm over your cheek, thumb swiping under your eye to pick up leftover tears. You nod, one of your trembly hands lazily dragging through his black locks of hair. “Mhm, m’good, Kenny. Help me sit up?” He does, one big palm on the back of your neck to help you to sit up against the headboard. 

He presses a smooch to your lips before easing himself out of you, both of you wincing softly from the loss of contact. It’s only when he pulls out completely and his softening cock falls against his thigh that he realises just how big of a mess the two of you made of yourself and the sheets. It makes him swell with pride, a grin slowly curling on his lips. 

You’ve come a long way, from the sweet girl who was just learning to cream on his cock to the messes you’ve made on his bed on the daily. 

“M’gunna get a cloth.” He says, handing you a glass of water and your phone as soon as he stands to keep you occupied. His muscles are still a bit tingly as he stands, arms stretching up and above his head as he heads towards the bathroom. 

“Nice butt!” You call out, making him snort softly as he stands before the bathroom mirror. He can’t help but admire the marks you’ve littered across his neck and chest, the cute little bruises reminding him of the shape of your puckered lips. He then examines the nail marks you’ve left along his forearms and shoulders, some of the red pathways breaking in the middle to show little droplets of blood. Lastly, he sighs dreamily at the sheen of your arousal that coats his pelvis, a ring of white still layered at his base. 

Man knew he was in heaven. 

When he came back to the bedroom after tidying himself a bit, as well as with a cloth in hand you were on the phone with someone, giggling into the receiver and looking up at Draken with a playful glint in your eye. 

“I’ll actually meet with you later, m’with my boyfriend right now~” Despite the way your giggling increased and you squealed to your friend about how you’ve mentioned him before with such excitement, Draken was anything but that. 

His chest tightened up, crease forming between his brow. Boyfriend? When did that become his title? 

“Kennnnnny~” You snapped him out of his thoughts, though his brows stayed furrowed. “Hurry! The mess is only getting bigger over here.”

One hand was planted on the mattress as he gently wiped the dampened towel over your pussy and thighs, your hand coming to cover his, making him pause in your tracks. “Shouldn’t scowl so much, handsome.” You murmur it gently, thumb gently smoothing between his brows in an attempt to fix the crinkles there. “You’ll get wrinkles~”

“You called me your boyfriend–” His voice was blunt, which took you by slight surprise. A little pout formed on your swollen lower lip as you subconsciously squeezed at his wrist. 

“Well, yea–”

“We haven’t talked about that.” He was still being blunt as ever, so much so it almost startled you, made you feel much smaller under him as he sat up on his hunched, throwing the soiled cloth into the laundry bin. 

“I-I know…” You simply muttered, chest started to feel tight as you watched just how serious his face had become. He was tugging his strands of black hair into a low bun when you sat up a bit more, fingers gently brushing over his chest. “But I just thought, thought that we were together…”

And it wasn’t wrong for you to think that way. Ever since that first night at Draken’s apartment the two of you had been secretly hanging out. You went out to restaurants, and the local arcade took his bike to the mountainside and watched the sunset. The two of you had bought little things for one another, like the gold anklet that sat pretty on your ankle and the hello kitty keychain that was currently attached to his bike keys. You even made sure to turn off your location so Takemichi couldn’t see just how often you were having sleepovers at Draken’s place. 

You two did the things that couples did together. You two did the things that you saw Takemichi and Hina do on the regular. Dare you even say, you did things with Draken that he and Emma used to do–

Plus, he was fucking you every chance he got. 

“Well, maybe you shoulda thought about talkin to me about it first before you go squealing that I’m your boyfriend.” His tone was harsher than he wanted it to be, a tone he usually used with his friends but never really with you. It had you suck in a soft breath, suddenly feeling very exposed curled up in nothing but his bedsheets. 

“You don’t have to be so mean–” 

“M’not being mean, I’m being realistic. It ain’t cute to just assume I’m your boyfriend when we haven’t talked about anything official.” He was off the bed now, tugging up his boxers. When you didn’t respond he sighed. “We hang out and fuck around, why do we need to be more than–” 

When he turned around again to look you in the eye his own voice caught in his throat. Your eyes had gotten wide, a glossy layer of tears hiding the usual beautiful shine your gaze held. Your lower lip was trembling softly, fingers clutching onto the covers so tightly he noticed how your knuckles turned white. 

“Hey–” 

“M’gunna go.” You interrupted, the crack in your tone only making his heart plummet harder in his chest. As you got to your feet, his blanket securely wrapped around you he grabbed both your shoulders. 

“Hey, don’t be like that (Y/N), you don’t even have a ride–” 

“Gunna call Michi.” You slipped out of his grasp by tucking yourself out from under his hands, bending to grab at your clothes scattered across the ground. 

“Like hell you are. We’re not telling him about us, remember what happened last time?” Draken could still hear the boy's ruthless comments after that first night, the crack of Baji’s fist against his jaw– 

“Don’t care, wanna go home.” Your muttering had gotten softer, ready to slip into the bathroom and shut the door right in his face. 

“Would you stop being such a brat?” Draken grabbed at your arm this time, tugging it back towards him. He himself hadn’t expected it to be so forceful, the little squeak you released and the falling of tears instantly making him let go of you. You both stared at each other a little shocked, Draken’s breath froze in his throat and his fingertips went a bit cold as you looked at him. 

Teary-eyed, shrunken in. Scared. Were you scared of him? 

Without a word, you finally went into the bathroom, and it was only then that Draken let out his frustrated breath, cheeks feeling hot as he clenched his fists up at his sides. Fuck, what the fuck was happening right now. He hated this nonsense, hated just how frustrated he felt, hated that look on your face, hated that he couldn’t even really understand what emotions were running through his head. 

Why was he mad anyway? Why was any of this really a big deal? 

He used his own phone to call you a cab, knowing you wouldn’t actually call Takemichi to pick you up. You had also gotten an ear full after getting caught, and as much as you trusted your brother, the last thing you needed right now was a lecture. You stayed locked in the bathroom until Draken gave the wood a gentle knock with his knuckles. 

“Cabs here…” He murmured. You didn’t look at him when you walked out, eyes bloodshot and downcast and when slipped past him fully clothed. He watched from the ledge of his bed, jaw set rigid as you so casually adjusted your bag over your shoulder, now a little overfilled with the stuff you had started to accumulate in his bathroom. Something slipped from your fingertips onto his kitchen counter before you made a beeline for the door, Draken only getting up when it closed firmly behind you. 

He approached slowly, that odd feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach seeming to grow, expanding into his chest as he noticed the subtle twinkle on the countertop. It was the anklet he bought you, dainty, gold, shiny, his initials hanging from the small tag. 

“Fuck—!“ His emotions boiled over into anger, face red when his fist connected with the drywall. A crack formed in the white fall, his knuckles taking on a deep purple almost instantly as he pulled his clenched fist back to his side. Instead, he let his forehead rest in the dent he just made, thoughts spiralling, making his heart pound in his chest. 

Had he really just done that? Made a big deal over nothing? Put his hands on you? And for what? 

You called him your boyfriend… was that really… so wrong? 

Was he really so set on “not being a sister fucker”, did he really care so much about what the boys thought, what people said about him, that he was willing to let you go? 

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed leaned up against the wall like that, thoughts running wildly through his mind, making it pound. Eventually, when his eyes started to get sore, narrowing down in an attempt to hold back unwanted angry tears he moved back to his room to plop himself down into bed. And he didn’t get up for the rest of the evening. 

It had been a week. 

One whole week since you had left Draken’s apartment, and the two of you had not spoken since. Day three was when Draken caved and texted you, considering you had turned your location off for him so he couldn’t check up on you from time to time. 

“Are you okay? Please, we need to talk.” 

Radio silence. The message was left unread by you. He even sent another the day after, just a quick message but a little more firm than the last. 

“Don’t shut me out like this.” 

And still, nothing. It was killing Draken from the inside out. Each day that passed made him more anxious than the last. Were you okay? Did you hate him now? Were you crying to your brother? Draken couldn’t ask Takemichi about you, cause he didn’t even know you two were a thing in the first place. But every time he saw his black-haired friend his heart would stutter, tightening up in his chest. 

You laughed just like he did. Were you laughing right now? 

Draken had a bad habit of letting things like this consume him. Almost everything seemed to remind him of you or something the two of you had done and it was driving him a little crazy. And all because you had called him your boyfriend. 

All because Draken was afraid to commit to someone again despite his need to do so. All of his friends always thought he was so mature, and yet here he was, working through feelings that were staring him right in the face like some teenage boy. 

He kept his headphones in at the shop, his body hunched slightly on the stool he set up beside the bike he was currently repairing. The music was loud, drowning out not only the background noise but his thoughts that seem to repeat themselves over and over. His brows were slightly furrowed when he lifted from the busted engine only a moment, just enough to wipe away excess sweat that built up on his brow. 

That’s when he caught a glimpse of you. It made his heart pause mid-beat, breath hitching in his throat. He caught the last bits of you as you rounded the corner that led up the stairs, probably in search of Takemichi But that didn’t matter. 

Draken found himself scurrying from his seat, the stool skidding from under him as he was quick to follow suit. With long strides, he made it to the stairs and there you were, hand on the railing, one of those cute little skirts he loved hugging your waist just right. He called out to you, twice actually, quickly pulling his headphones from his ears when you actually turned to look at him. 

“Hey–” 

“I won’t be long.” You simply responded, voice sounding much too sad for Draken’s liking. He noticed how your hand tensed up on the railing when he approached and it made him frown. “I’m just grabbing something for Michi–”

“I wanna talk to you.” He took another step, a tentative one. He hated how your eyes were already getting a little glassy. “Let’s just talk, sweetheart.”

“Don’t wanna talk, Ken.” There was that familiar shake in your tone, the one he had become very aware of. You were just like your brother in so many ways.

His sweet little crybaby. 

“C’mere…” He was on the step right in front of you now, the levelling allowing him to lean down just a bit so his face could be close to yours. You took your time meeting his gaze, fingers now fidgeting with the hem of your skirt. “It’s okay baby…” 

“You–” He could tell you were trying to gather your bearings, trying so desperately not to crumble and let the tears fall that were already sitting in your lashes. He was patient with you, scared that if he went in too strong you’d just run off from him again. You sucked in a shaky breath before continuing. “You really hurt me, Draken.” 

He could have hissed, chest getting a little tight. He hated the way that nickname sounded coming from you. 

“I know, I know little love and–” 

“Do you not wanna be my boyfriend? I thought you liked me.” 

“I do like you–”

“Then be my boyfriend.” It had been a bit more firm than he expected, your brows set and a little pout on your lips after you spoke it. Had things been a little different, he would have told you just how proud he was of you for standing your ground like that. 

“It’s not, it's just not that simple.” It was his turn to think his words over, lips catching between his teeth as those doubtful thoughts started returning to him. He was right, wasn’t he? It wasn’t that simple because– 

“Why not?” You were being blunt again, words bordering on angry as you sniffled. The first few tears finally fell and Draken wanted nothing more than to wipe them away. 

“Well to start, there’s your brother–” 

“I don’t care what Michi thinks!” You groaned it out as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I wanna be with you, Ken–” 

“But–” He really hated that he couldn’t seem to find the right words. 

“What are you so afraid of?”  

That really made Draken stop, eyes widening just a bit as he looked back into your teary ones. Your chest was heaving a bit as the silence sat heavily between the two of you. Draken blinked, once, twice, brain reeling over this one simple question. 

Draken had been in many fights, grew up in a brothel, seen blood and gore and sex and a lot of things people shouldn’t see. He wasn’t scared any of those times. So, why now? Why was he so scared now as he looked into your eyes that were basically pleading with him for an answer. 

“I–” His words were shaky, and finally broke the intense gaze the two of you were sharing as he looked down. “I dunno.” 

There was another beat of silence before you continued up the staircase. Draken only looked up when he knew you were at the top, far enough away from him that he didn’t have to feel like your gaze was piercing him. He wished that he didn’t look though, wished that he hadn’t seen that sad smile on your lips. 

He never wanted to see that ever again, not on you. 

“I hope I’ll still be around when you figure it out.” 

Drake wasn’t sure how much time had passed now since he had seen you. The first few days he refused to even think about that interaction on the stairs. That sad smile of yours easily pulls his heart apart and thinking back on it only made him more and more pissed at himself. 

So instead of thinking of you, he filled his time with work. He found himself opening and closing the shop, despite Inui trying to make him go back to their balanced schedule. He took on more projects, burying himself under the weight of grease and bolts instead of dealing with the weight that now sat in his chest.

You hadn’t come back to the shop yet either, he had a feeling you’d never come back. 

What got Draken out of work early one night was a call from Mitsuya. He called twice before Draken reluctantly picked up the phone, the annoyance clear in his tone as he held the phone to his ear with his shoulder. 

“Ya know m’working–” 

“Well, you sound just delighted to hear from me~” Mitsuya hummed, chuckling when he heard Draken’s grunt from the other end of the phone. Mitsuya was organising threads by colour when he spoke. “Come over tonight?” 

“I don’t feel like partying,” Draken answered back right away. What he meant though was that he didn’t wanna go in case Takemichi was there because then he would only remind him of– 

“It’s not gonna be a party doofus, it’ll just be us two.” Draken made a look of disgust, more so at the insult than anything else. “Just come.” 

“I have shit to do here–” He was trying his best to get out of this, but if anyone could see through Draken’s bullshit, it was Mitsuya. 

“You’ve locked yourself in that damn shop for the past week, I know you can make a little time to go out. Let Inui close tonight.”

“Nah, it’s my night.” It wasn’t.

“Bet you haven’t even showered.” 

“Oh fuck off–” Draken grunted, sniffing himself only because Mitsuya wasn’t there to give him the side-eye. He scowled softly to himself when the scent he picked up coming from his overalls was far from pleasant. “Will you quit nagging me if I come, mom?” 

“Absolutely buddy.” Mitsuya was chuckling softly, rolling in his chair to pull back up to his sewing table. “See you at 7, doofus.” 

Draken wasn’t given the opportunity to snap back with something clever, the phone went dead right away. With a huff Draken resultantly found himself putting his tools away, tucking his overused workbench in its proper corner so he could head off to Mistuya’s. 

But not without a shower first. 

Draken’s hair was still damp when he headed for Mitsuya’s place. With how fast Draken sped his bike down the freeway, it only took about ten minutes tops. Draken lugged a case of beer with him up to the familiar walkway that belonged to Mitsuya’s townhouse. When he opened the door he still had his work glasses on, a lazy grin tugging on his features when he was met with the sight of Draken’s scowling face. 

“Would you look at that, he showered.”

Draken just rolled his eyes, nudging past Mitsuya and making himself at home. The two found themselves quickly situated on the couch, spread out on each end and open beers on coasters. Mitsuya had pulled out his old N64, so the two were currently in a round of Mario kart. The silence had been comfortable between the two, as it usually was until Mitsuay finally decided to speak up. 

“So, what's got you fucked up?” 

“What?” Draken said with a short laugh, his eyes staying glued to the tv screen. 

“You only get all solitary like this when something is really bothering you, so–” 

“Nothin’s up, m’good.” Draken simply grunted, which quickly turned into a scowl when Mitusya passed him for first place in the game. “Quit distracting me.” 

“Is it Takemichi’s little sister?”

Draken almost choked on his beer, finally looking away from the screen to look at Mitsuya who was still calm as ever. Only after he passed the finish line did he meet Draken’s gaze, one brow lifted up. 

“What about her?” 

“You were seeing her–” 

“I was not.” 

Now it was Mitsuya’s turn to laugh, a hearty one too that only made Draken’s brows furrow further. He pulled his glasses from his face, sighing out as he shook his head. 

“You think you’re so hard to read, but you’re not.” Mitsuya kept talking before Draken could bark at him. “I know you kept seeing her after that night.” 

“Okay, so?” Draken wasn’t sure why he was getting so defensive, maybe it was because it pissed him off that Mitsuya knew him better than he knew himself. 

“So, did you two break up?”

“We were never together.” Draken simply stated, going to start another round of Mario kart. But as soon as the words left his lips he hated the way they sounded, and now that they were out there, floating around his head it made him grip his controller a little tighter. 

“Oh, you weren’t?” Mitsuya said, that dumb smile of his making Draken shake his head, grit his teeth even. It was Mitsuya’s turn to scoff, tipping his beer back to polish it off. “You are such a fuckin doofus dude.” 

“Watch your mouth man–” 

“Why are ya doing this to yourself?” Draken sucked in a little breath. The silence hung in the air between them a little and Mitsuya rolled his eyes when he saw how Draken’s head tipped slightly to the side in confusion. He continued as he opened up another beer. “Why aren’t you letting yourself be happy? You can do commitment, you’ve done it before.” 

Draken felt a little frozen in place, eyes unfocused as he tried to process what Mitsuya had so obviously laid out for him. His heart started to pick up in his chest as he really thought it over, well at least tried to. “Yea, I did it before and look what happened.” 

Flashes of his relationship with Emma were impossible to ignore. How things went from wonderful to terrible so quickly. How the two of them became each other's world so fast for it all to crash and burn. The fighting, the lies, how he was so scared after he lost her but to also lose everyone he loved. His found family was all he had, and if they had decided to up and leave– 

“Sure, it was a bad breakup,” Mitsuya spoke with a simple shrug of his shoulders, looking at Draken’s pained face over the lip of his bottle. “But it didn’t stay bad, did it?” 

“Guess not…” Draken murmured. It didn’t. He didn’t lose his best friends, he didn’t even really lose Emma. After time apart and some growing up, the two had gone back to speaking terms. 

“So, let yourself be happy, dude.” 

“But she’s another little sister–” 

“Yea you have a type.” Mitsuya couldn’t help but laugh, especially after Draken sent his controller flying at him. Mitsuya thankfully caught it, holding a hand up in defence. “Relax! I’m joking… The boys are gonna bug you about it, but Draken, who the fuck cares.” 

Draken slowly nodded at that, allowing himself to really think it all over. He had never been the type to care so much about what others thought about him. He was letting himself get in his head for something that was already over and done with. Rubbing his hand over his forehead, he picked up another beer, shaking his head as he twisted the top off to chug some of it down. 

“I hate you, you know that?” He mumbled to Mitsuya, which only made him laugh out loud in response. He clinked his bottle up against Draken’s. 

“Love you too buddy. You should really make up with her.” Draken eyed Mitsuya over the lip of his beer. “I assume you said some dumb guy shit to her.” 

Draken pouted, mumbling something along the lines of “maybe I did” before he took another drink. Looking down the stem of the bottle Draken sighed softly, thinking of that sad smile on your face. It made him scoff at himself. “I just– I’m not sure I’ll be able to treat her right, as her boyfriend.” 

“Well, she’s stuck around this long, hasn’t she?” Mitsuya started to set up another game of Mario Kart for the two of them as Draken nodded slowly. “I’m sure if she didn’t think you’d treat her right, she woulda left.” 

Those couple words were left lingering in Draken’s head the rest of the evening. Mitsuya didn’t bring it up again, and Draken didn’t dare to. But as he started to pass out on his friend's couch, he had one too many beers to be driving himself home, he really thought over what Mitsuya had said. What he knew was right. 

I’m sure if she didn’t think you'd treat her right, she woulda left. 

Draken chuckled softly to himself, his palm coming up to slap him right on the forehead. The sting made him hiss to himself, but it's what he deserved. He’d never admit it out loud, but sometimes he wished his brain worked the way Mitsuya’s did. 

“I’m such an idiot.” He spoke, and it was Mitsuya sleepy agreeing with him on the couch beside him that had him laughing all over again. 

He knew you’d be finishing classes up on campus right now, had picked you up and dropped you off many times before to know that you’d be coming out of the big college building any minute now. He parked right out front, his hands dug deep into his pockets as he watched the door. His eyes scanned over many faces, all different kinds, all of them filtering through, onyx gaze trying to lock onto– 

You. 

You were in the middle of giggling, those familiar wrinkles showing up around the corners of your eyes, your pretty manicured nails holding the books you had tighter to your chest. The image made him smile fondly, lips upturned just a little when the two of you finally made eye contact. 

He was more than grateful that you returned the small smile. The darkest parts of him had conceived him; you'd simply walk right by him, or even turn around in the opposite direction. But instead, you excused yourself from your friends, who all couldn’t help but side-eye the older, imitating dude leaning on a motorcycle, dragon tattoo on full display with his hair pulled up in a loose ponytail. As you approach he speaks, unable to keep his eyes off your own. 

“Hey.” 

“Hi, Ken.” Just the way you say his name makes his heart flutter a little. He moves to the side, opening up the small compartment on his bike that’ll allow you to put your books inside. 

“Come with me?” He asks, and the momentary silence makes him feel more nervous than he had in a long time. You could say no, he could have taken too long. You could have already slipped right out of his fingertips and it would be all his fault– 

“Okay.” You simply reply, and your smile doesn’t falter. It stays as you tuck your books away, as he places his helmet on your bread and helps you adjust the straps. You in front of him on the bike just as you had on that first night he picked you up. His hands easily swallowed yours on the handlebars, and before you knew it the two of you were speeding off towards his place. You knew that because the route had become too familiar after the many times he’d whisked you away after school. Your heart was beating fast in your chest like it normally did when you rode on Draken’s bike. It filled you with a type of adrenaline you hadn’t been able to find anywhere else. 

That and the fact that his hands seemed to be holding yours tighter than usual. 

After a couple of sharp turns and uphill roads, you two made it to Draken’s apartment. He gave you your space as you two headed to his room a couple of floors up, his heart seeming to be in his throat. He needed to relax, he knew exactly what he had to say to you, knew what he had to do, and yet as he fiddled with his keys a bit to find the right one that opened his apartment, the familiar scent of your perfume was making his brain a little foggy. 

It was the warmth of your fingers that shook him from whatever haze he was in, the tips of his ears feeling a bit hot as your fingers easily tugged the right key, helped him slip it into the lock. “It’s this one, Ken.” You say it as if your presence alone isn’t making him weak at the knees. 

He just nodded, allowing you in first. Shoes were slipped off and the two of you found yourself in his kitchen. You stood right in the middle, your arms tucked neatly behind your back, hands clasped. He missed the way you used to make yourself at home, grabbing something from his fridge or sprawling out on his couch. 

He wanted you to be that comfortable again. 

“I really needed to see you.” He started, his voice a little hesitant. He cleared his throat, fingers once again in his pockets. He looked everywhere but at you, despite the way he felt your gentle gaze burning into him. “I needed, I just–” He huffed. “I really fucked up–” 

There was your familiar warmth again, but instead, you were grabbing at one of his hands. So easily your fingers threaded into his, and suddenly the weight in his tummy didn’t feel all that heavy as he looked down at you, those wide pretty eyes he had missed so fucking much. “You did kinda fuck up–” You murmur, which makes him huff again, this time with a hint of laughter behind it. “I know I did. I know.”

He pulled you in a little closer, and he was so very grateful that you weren't resistant. In fact, you melted into his chest, your face finding that familiar comfortable spot against his peck, cheek pressed up against where you felt his heartbeat, which was currently pounding in his chest. He sucks in another breath, one hand coming to gently pet your head. “I’m sorry, I’m real sorry sweetheart…” He feels the way you start to tremble and it eats at him, brows furrowing up. “Please, don’t babygirl, m’tryna apologise to you–” 

“Don’t be dumb like that ever again Ken.” Your voice waves and he knows you’re about to cry, but he doesn't stop you from speaking, if anything, your shaky words only make him hold you tighter, a fond smile coming to his lips. “Don’t leave me like that again!” Your voice cracks and Ken has to chuckle under his breath, but there's no bite to his laughter, only fondness. “Next time, just talk to me. I-I know I’m younger and inexperienced b-but I know what I want and that's you–” 

That's when he finally stops you, one big palm cupping your cheek. He tilts your head up, thumb smoothing over your cheekbone before he's pressing a smooch to your lips. You both seem to relax against the embrace, and when he feels a salty tear hit his thumb he swipes it away, lips parting from your just enough so he can murmur against them. 

“I know, lil love. I know.” When your lower lip trembles a bit a smile breaks out on his lips. One that makes the corner of his lips twitch, little wrinkles showing up around his eyes. His hands cup your neck so gently, thumbs pressing up against the underside of your jaw. He murmurs again, this time his words slurred along with your breathy, soft whimper. “I want you too…” 

This time the kiss is desperate, needy. Your fingers turn white at the knuckles when you grip at his shirt, lips moulding against his own. Draken’s tongue is impatient, slithering into your open mouth and reexploring the warm cavern that is your mouth. He huffs when your chest presses flush to him, and with ease his big hands cup your thighs, scooping you into his embrace. Your legs cling to his waist without a thought, the giddy giggle bubbling from your lips and against his own making a bit of blush rise on his cheeks. 

Oh, how he missed that sweet, sweet sound. 

Draken tries not to trip over himself as he carries you off to his bedroom, his back hitting up against the door at the same time your teeth playfully tug at his bottom lip. He drops you down and the bounce of your body has both of you a little too excited, Draken’s shirt easily coming off as he tugs it up over his head. 

“Lemme show you how badly I want you, baby.” His voice has already gotten deeper, and as his big hand comes to cup the back of your neck to pull you in for another kiss he’s a bit surprised when both your palms press against his chest, pushing him away an inch.

Surprised and panicked. Was he moving too fast, did you think he was just using you in your vulnerable moment? Had he really fucked up so soon again– 

His breath left him in a huff when his back hit the mattress, your body rolling over him. He blinked a few times as you straddled him, palms pressed against his chest and your face heated. He could tell that a flush was working its way up to your cheeks when you looked down at him, your body slowly scooting down from his waist to his hips. 

“No, let me s-show you.” Despite just how nervous you were, Draken could tell by the way you chewed on your lower lip, how your fingers trembled a little, undoing his belt and zipper, his cock still twitched with excitement underneath you an odd sense of pride flowing through him. 

You had come a long way, from the virgin he met all those months ago. He had just been the biggest idiot and here he was, pushing his hair from his face so he could watch how your pretty little hands handled his semi-hard cock with such care. How you looked at him first, batted your lashes when you leaned in and pressed the sweetest of kisses right to his tip. 

“Oh fuck—“ 

Yea, he was never letting you go again, ever. 

You took a deep breath through your nose before taking his tip between your lips, your eyes never leaving his dilated ones. He propped himself up on an elbow, free hand easing the hair away from your face. It was a sight that would be burned into his mind forever. Wide doe eyes, hand barely wrapped around his fat base, pretty lips suckling away at his tip. 

“You’re gonna be the fuckin death of me pretty girl.” Draken chuckles breathlessly, and the little glint in your eyes tells him you would have smiled had your lips not been preoccupied. He kept his hand gentle on the back of your head as you slowly took more of him, your tongue flattening out against his underside. His head tilted back in a groan at your steady pace, the warmth of your mouth making his skin prickle with pleasure. His fingers curled in your hair just a bit, enough to hold him back from jerking his hips into you, make you gag– 

He’d save it for another time. 

“Atta girl…” He murmured, chest rising and falling a little faster as you gained your rhythm. Your eyes peaked up at him again, before you got back into it, cheeks hollowing as you took as much of him into your mouth as possible. You reached about halfway, which Draken noticed made your brows furrow up. 

“S’okay, we’ve got plenty of time to make it fit, keep going lil love.” He encouraged, and you listened, head continuing to bob faster, sloppier. Draken could feel your drool dribbling down his shaft and onto his balls and it made him shiver. It didn’t help that your ass was up high, practically swaying like an excited little puppy just to be sucking him off. Swearing under his breath a moment as his balls suddenly felt all too tight, he pulled you off his cock, the pornographic pop of your lips making him grunt, you whine. The string of drool connecting your swollen lips to his cock was thick, and when it snapped onto your chin Draken could feel himself getting lightheaded. 

“W-Why did you–” He silenced your whining with another fierce kiss, and without hesitation you were manhandled back into his pillows, flat on your back. He has no problem working your soiled panties off your thighs, deciding to just tuck the extra material of your skirt into the waistband “Felt fucking awesome.” Your panties are tossed right over your shoulder, a cute yelp leaving you when he hauls both your thighs up, over his shoulders. “But I wanna cum in this pretty pussy.” 

From this position your pussy was split wide open for him, your clit poking out and throbbing from under the hood. He sighed, content, pausing his previous actions to lean in, pressing the softest of kisses right up against your clit. 

“My pretty pussy.” His soft touch is gone, replaced with his burning desire to claim you again. A few rubs of his cock against your slicken folds, along with your drool is enough to get his cock wet enough to slip in. His breathing hitches once his head makes it past the tight ring of your muscles, the squeeze vice-like just from the simple intrusion. 

“K-Ken–” 

“Shh, I know.” He coos, hunching over you. With your thighs on his shoulders, his shifting has you in a mating press, a position that all too knew and is making your head spin. Your tummy folds the closer he gets to you, the pad of his thumb rubbing soothing circles into your clit while the other intertwines with the hand you had gripping the sheets close to your head. “S’always gonna be a lil tight, isn’t it babygirl.” 

You’re already moaning in a wonton fashion, eyes struggling to stay open as he rocks his cock head in and out, his thumb working at your nub. When your pussy starts fluttering for him he works in a few more inches, needy sounds spilling into each other mouth due to his lips staying inches away from your own. “Gonna take it all f’me? Be my good girl?”  

You nod, and when you look at him again your eyes have that familiar glassy sheen he’s grown to love. He kisses you right under the eye before with one good push his cock is all the way inside. The sound you make is downright sinful, something between a cry and a mewl and it has Draken’s cock twitching within the tightness of your cunt. It makes his vision go a little stary, the growl he releases vibrating through his chest. 

“Good fucking girl.” The slap of his hips into your ass resounds throughout the room, squelching soon coming from between your bodies. In this position his cock nuzzles your sweet spot, seeming to reach down deep, into parts of you that you didn’t even realise existed, and it quickly has you falling apart, babbles freely spilling from your lips, tears wetting your hot cheeks. Draken is quick to kiss them away, his fingers tightening around yours as he puffs hot pants along your face. 

“D-Deep~!” You manage to squeak, and Draken has to crack a grin, his hips suddenly stopping their brutal pace just so he can roll them instead. That had you gasping, drool spilling from your hung lips as you look up at him with a gaze that's already beyond fucked out. “S’real deep baby, s’good though yea?” 

You nod, fresh tears on your lashes. “Only the best for my baby.” He utters, hips switching back and forth between rutting and grinding. He’s convinced you’ve already cum on his cock, the amount of slick bubbling around his shaft and the tightness of your walls are his hints, but he keeps going, needing to fill you up after so long. Despite your cries, he brings his hand back to your clit, his rubs becoming sloppy. He only releases your hand to cup the back of your neck instead, keeping your foreheads pressed together. 

“Eyes on me, lil love.” You do manage to open your teary eyes, meeting his dilated pupils. “Good, good girl.” His body starts to twitch, broad shoulders rippling and his thighs starting to tremble as his own release quickly builds in his gut. “I– fuck. Baby, I love you, pretty–” 

And despite just how dumbed out you were moments before, those words seem to bring some clarity to your eyes. Your fingers tangle into his sweaty hair, gripping it at the roots for your sanity. The pleasant little laugh you let out and breathe against his lips makes his heart jump against his ribcage. 

“I love y-you Ken, love you so much, Kenny–” 

His climax hits him hard, the full-body chill he experiences making goosebumps rise along his spine as he fills you up. The feeling of his warm, thick cum is enough to have you coming undone right along with him, the sensation being yet another new one when liquid seems to gush past your little hole. It makes Draken’s balls tighten up instantly, the warm splash of your arousal onto his fingers that still gently coax pleasure out of your clit. And he can’t help but grin, a boyish grin that quickly turns into a grunt. “Fuck, fuckin squirtin on me, how cute.” 

He doesn’t pull out, he can’t. He needs to be close to you, keep your limp body tucked carefully underneath him. You’re too far in to even notice the mess, your whines and whimpers dwindling down into soft breaths as he turns to his side, keeping you in his chest. His cock slowly softens in your walls, and even then, Draken’s keeps you glued to him as you both come down, tremors and pants still coming over both of you. 

“Sweetheart.” He murmurs, face nuzzling up against your temple. When he gets a whine in return he holds you closer, careful to ease your face away from his chest so he can cover your tear-streaked face in kisses. “You’re okay, my baby…” 

Draken is usually more responsible than this. Then to let you two doze off without a proper clean-up. But feeling your soft heartbeat against his, your fingers still lost in his hair, your lips pressed right up into the crook of his neck and puffing soft air, he just couldn't bring himself to let go. He didn’t want to let go now, or ever. Keeping you here, wrapped in his embrace, he was certain that you’d be there tomorrow morning too, with that beautiful smile he had fallen stupidly, hopelessly, in love with. 

Fuck it. He was taking on the little sister fucker title with pride. 

“Kenny, your hand is sweaty.” You murmur, trying to hold back your laughter when he shoots you a glare, pulling his hand away from you and dramatically rubbing it along his jeans. 

“Fine, just won’t hold your hand, brat” He grumbles, and that sets you over, wrapping your arms around him mid-walk to press small kisses along his collar bones. 

Draken hadn’t felt this nervous ever, in his entire life (this was a lie, he’s just dramatic as ever). The two of you were only steps away from your place, the same place you and Takemichi lived in together. Everyone was there, the entire found family, and you two were now official…

He was getting flashbacks of the group chat, his friend's ruthless behaviour, the way Takemichi hadn’t talked to him for one whole week, and the sweet satisfaction Baji got when he got one free punch to his jaw for Takemichi’s sake. 

“Maybe we can tell them next week, or over a call. Whattya think lil love,” Draken murmured, his face hiding in your hairline. Your sweet laughter sent that familiar warmth through his chest, and one good tug on his hand had him reluctantly walking back towards the house. “You’ll be fine.” You say with a smile, pressing a kiss to the back of his hand. “We’re gonna do it together.” 

When you hopped up onto the front step, Draken’s eyes trailed down to the sweet dangling sound that was the anklet looped around your ankle. The gold one, with his initials, right where it belonged. The sight had him calming a little, brows furrowed in the way they usually did when he became focused. “Right, together.” 

“Michi-nii!” You call out once the two of you enter the house, the sound of music and chatter already filling the front entrance. Draken holds your hand a little tighter as if he had been entering a place he’d never been before. 

“Living room!” Takemichi calls out, surrounded by founding members of toman, each huddled around the kotatsu table that was covered in snacks, beers, and cards. Oddly enough the chatter died down as Takemichi was dealing out for another round, a laugh leaving his lips. 

“You guys gonna take this round seriously–” It was Mikey’s elbow into his ribs that silenced him, a little puff escaping his lungs. He was about to complain when his eyes were brought to what everyone seemed to be staring at. 

And that was you, beaming smile and all, with your hand held tightly by Draken’s, who couldn't seem to make eye contact with anyone. 

“Hi Michi~ Hi everyone! What are ya–” 

“Finally.” Mitsuya was the first to mutter, leaning back further into his spot on the couch. “Chifuyu, you owe me 20 bucks, told you they’d come out today.” 

“No fair!” Chifuyu blurted out, grumbling when he reluctantly pulled bills from his pocket. Pah and Peh were the first to start laughing, clinking their beers together.” 

“Wait, you knew? How?” Mikey questioned Mitsuya, who triumphantly took the money from Chifuyu with a laugh of his own. Kazutora was even starting to crack up, hiding his smirk behind his beer. 

And despite all the commotion, Takemichi sat dumbfounded, eyes glued to yours and Draken’s intertwined hands. When he did finally speak, it only made the group that much rowdier. 

“Well, what the fuck is this–” 

“Time for another punch,” Baji said with that signature grin of his, basically hoping from his spot on the couch. 

“Wait wait!” You said, your pout only stirring the pot further. “No one is punching anyone! We’re–”

“We are dating,” Draken said, eyes a bit narrowed as he spoke. “We’re dating, Takemichi, I wanna date your sister, and I’m gonna.” 

There was another round of silence in the room, but it didn’t last, not when Pah mumbled under his breath. 

“Classic sister fucker–”

“Well, you could have at least asked first?!” Takemichi was dramatic as ever, tears swelling up in his eyes at the thought of his precious little sister being tarnished by the big, mean, scary man that was Draken. He let go of your hand then, being just as dramatic as Takemichi if not more so “I did ask, I just asked in front of everyone.” 

“But you’re already dating, have been a while no…?” Classic Mitsuya, stirring the pot and making everyone act up yet again. 

“Now why would you say that you ass–”

“C’mon Michi, I’ll punch him again for you, one good punch like last time–” Baji was punching at the air for emphasis. 

“Sister fucker behaviour,” Peh said with a shake of his head, only making Pah laugh harder. 

And amidst the bickering and nonsense that always seemed to break out between the boys, you took a seat next to Mikey, taking the Taiyaki he had to offer you with a little huff. He noticed the anklet, observant as ever as you rolled your eyes when Takemichi actually started crying, something about you losing your innocence. 

“He’ll treat you right.” You looked at Mikey, who spared you a small smile and a pat on the head. “Draken–”

“I know!” You responded happily, eyeing him as he held Baji back, the nerves he was feeling earlier long gone. You took a bite of the Taiyaki and giggled. 

“I can’t wait to be with him, forever!”

property of kenslilove, do not copy, repost, translate, or move onto any other platform!! 

[sugar-and-pearls]

Howdy ghouls, folks and dearie- ohs

My name is Hedone and I've been in this community for about three years now. I love it truly and wish never to be parted from it. But in that time I've noticed somethings. Like how it can be difficult to survive it, especially when your starting out I feel. So, to give back I made this;

This is your guide on how to make friends and survive the selfshipping community.

So with that out the way, there are some steps to survive.

Create -

In my view, self shipping is often a creative outlet as it is a comforting one. The ability to take a piece of media into my hands and shape it to my whims and will is often awe-inspiring. I'll admit it's easier to see it with other people than with ourselves.

So with this in mind - start off small, though if you want to go guns blazing you can do that too. It doesn't have to be a lot. If you feel embarrassed, don't be. If you are afraid then don't worry cus your definitely not alone there.

Often times it helps to make a promo. This way people who find you can know some quick facts; your title, your fos and any other bits of info you wish to give. Most people will want to know if you share an fo or not - whether this is in case they are uncomfortable with share or want to know if your comfortable with sharing. Whether you are or not is your choice.

'this user' boxes are a fun way to decorate and tell people about yourself. If your worried about how it looks, then make another one, there's no limit unless you make one. Some people make Cards for it. If that's intimidating, don't worry boo, this is Tumblr - you do you.

My first real post was about what it would be like my mind was like a house and what which fos would stay and which ones would come and go. I posted it three years ago and in all that time it has gotten 16 notes on it. Does that mean that I shouldn't have created it? no, no it doesn't. Because when I read it it makes me happy.

Do a gush post, make art, start 'reblog with your f/o' game, write stories, make a moodboard - start the flow on those creative juices.

interact -

I've seen a lot of people be nervous about talking to new people and I can tell you, I feel the same. Its daunting, talking to someone new and it can be awkward wading through the small talk. Most people are in the same boat as you; nervous and wishing to talk about their fos.

Instead of focusing on being popular, try and make friends instead, its much much more emotionally fulling than the first option. Find people with fos in the same source, and try and build it up from there. You'll find your weridos eventually - you just got to sieve though the rest first. You don't have to be best pals with everyone on there but be friendly.

If you recognise a character, why not send an ask? If you have a mutual in mind, why not try and talk with them? Reblog other people's art and moodboards and posts. Doing content trades is a great way to interact with people (and boo if your worried or don't think your content is very good, don't be - we're all evolving here). Also if you can or just like to draw, you can make fanarts for a selfship you like or would like to be your mutual - like I said before, everyone on here just wants to talk about their fos here, all that is needed is a small push first.

With that in mind not everyone you talk to is going to like you, or interact the same way you do. Everyone has a style to themselves and that's ok - the trick is find someone who has the same, or a similar style as you. Even though we are interacting through a screen, remember that there is another person behind that screen; ask them how they're doing, what they're up to, if anything positive happen in their life.

Also be careful about the kinds of people you want to befriend- do they give back what you give first? Do they share your joy? You're bound to find many you click with, just be patient and don't give up - you got this 👍😊👍

Make Friends From All Walks Of The Community -

You'll never know who you're fandom buddy will be - Antis, proships, all are people and all have a different flavour to one another. Its up to you to pick. I've found that to survive here you have to lay roots. No man is an island after all. If you don't agree with a someone's ship or like it doesn't cost much to just be polite. Being considerate and kind to other people's selfships goes a long way round here.

Insecurity

Its pretty easy to feel intimidated by other's success. feeling like their ships are being validated while yours aren't (trust me here - I know what I speak of) but here's what you have to remember: We're all just people daydreaming about fictional characters - No one is better than you and you f/os will always love you!

This is one of the many reasons why building a foundation of fellow weridos is important, its good to have a someone that your able to lean on and vice versa.

But main point here is that no matter what, no one can take away your fos love for you nor your love for them. And if they try, flip them the 🖕 cus we don't give a 🦆

Karma -

I see a few newbies do this where they go onto someone's blog, reblog a game but not send in an ask from that game. If you reblog an ask game off of someone, sent in an ask from that game. Every little helps and it spreads the love around.

Tumblr is not like Instagram, likes are not the currency here. Reblog other people's art and moodboards and posts. Leave a comment in the tags about the things you like or what you felt like when you saw it, send in an ask about their post.

Remember that even though we are interacting through a screen, there is another person behind that screen; Wishing for the same things as you do.

Take Breaks

It can be tiring on here, takes up a lot of energy so taking breaks can be good for you.

It's not like your fos are going to run away the second you turn your back - come away from Tumblr for a bit and reconnect with the outside, touch some grass, take a walk outside for a while. Its can be for as long as you like. I usually find that I like to take these breaks when I have things planned, so like if I'm going somewhere or have a thing planned I generally just try and stay off Tumblr for as long as I can, till I really want to.

If you feel like your abandoning your fos then why not take them with you? what would they say when your outside? How would they react? What would you say back? things like that.

Like with many of my posts, I doubt it will get much attraction. But if one person sees it and it helps them, then that's my dues paid, my contribute made. A very special thank you to @echoes-lighthouse @wisemins @hibiscus-ships @tex-treasures @missnaunet @vanilla-ending, @multyshipping for all your tips and helps with making this post.

With that said, thank you for reading this and if you never see me again

Merry Meet, Merry Part and Merry met Again.

[mi-lady-kiiira]

💍Selfship with my handsome prince, Izuru Kira💍

dividers by the lovely @/hitobaby

💎Headcanons:

His Nicknames for Me:

"Bluebell" - Because I have the same name as his captain and he would die if anyone ever thought that he was referring to Otoribashi when he's speaking about me

"Sweetheart, Love, Angel, Darling" - his usual terms of endearment for me

"My Muse" - Zu says that I give him inspiration for a lot of his poems; it's so sweet when he keeps shooting me little glances from his writing desk while I lounge on the futon. I MUST get up and give him kisses.

"Princess" - He is my prince and I am his princess, it shall be no other way

"Stop, damnit" - This is not a term of endearment, but he says it so often and casually that you'd think that it was

My Nicknames for Him:

"Zu, Zuzu, Zuru"- Basically just shortened versions of his name

"Handsome" - Because he is very much so💙

"FAT DICK ZU" - He acts like he doesn't like it, but I can see through his lies with my Kidō. He also blushes everytime I say it but has explicitly told me not to call him that in front of other people :(

"Prince Zu, King of My Heart" - I know it is a contradiction, leave me alone

Daily Life Headcanons (SFW):

I pack his lunch every morning and slip in little notes with love affirmations and words of encouragement to help him navigate throughout his day

He puts short poems and haiku that he's written for me in my lunches. Also leaves poems in random places around the house for me to find.

On many occasions, he has snuck into my office while I'm in meetings or on errands and left cute little notes on my computer (along with some snack - I need snack)

He started making our evening tea solely by himself because I was fucking it up everytime. (I do not know how to brew tea) I also can't reach the tea set on the top shelf, but that's probably a good thing because I have butterfingers

Since Rose started tying his hair with ribbons, I brush his hair and tie his ribbons in for him in the mornings. He has to have one in every color, because I need color coordination (inspired by this fanart from Pinterest - not mine!)

If my bonnet slips off while I'm sleeping, he'll fix it quietly while trying not to wake me up (I ain't waking up, I sleep like a rock)

Sometimes we both forget where we put our glasses and just walk around like two blind bats, running into stuff (and each other) until we find them. Zu wears contacts as well (that somehow make his eyes look even brighter 🥹💙)

He loves listening to music together (he has one of those old school iPod nanos in blue and refuses to upgrade to anything newer - inspired by this post (that I can't find atm, rip)

He knows when I'm starting to get anxious/have a panic attack because I will start pacing and wringing my hands. To calm me down, he will come up and hug me from behind, gently take my hands into his, and help me do breathing exercises.

When he gets into a downtrodden mood, I can tell immediately because he's 10X quieter and his eyes lose a little of their sheen. I will cancel all of my meetings for the day, get us food, and hole us up in our bedroom in our secret blanket fort. No leaving the fort unless for bathroom. Endless cuddles and affirmations.

🔥NSFW Headcanons:

His kinks: shibari, thigh-fucking, edging, overstimulation, head-crushing (receiving), hair-pulling (both), oral (giving)

Favorite positions: missionary, cowgirl, against the wall, spooning/side

Does he prefer giving or receiving: giving

He is a switch/soft!dom

Is he a tease? ABSOLUTELY FUCKING YES.

Does he like being teased? Yes, but not too much and for too long. He likes to get things started fairly quickly when 'he's' on the receiving end of the teasing.

Praise or degradation?: A mixture of both, with more praise

When he's fed up with my shenanigans or I've been teasing him too much, he makes me kneel before him on the tatami mat in our room. His hand is on the back of my neck, holding my face away from him while he strokes his hard cock.

"You've been acting like a naughty girl all day today, bluebell. Do you think that I should give you my cock? Hmm, I don't think so." (he's soooooo mean💙🫶🏽)

We both have quietly discussed our interest of having a threesome with Shuuhei but are both too INCREDIBLY shy to bring it up to him.

It is imperative that I start my day out with a cumshot in my coffee. Can't make it throughout my day in the Seireitei without Izuru's protein shake. Yum.

He actually indulges me, surprisingly. Not without his entire body turning red as he strokes himself into my specimen jar. He's such a peach.

I've asked him to wrap Wabisuke around my neck a couple of times (The answer was 'no' each and every time, btw :(

Has a HUGE freaky side. He tries to act all prim and proper, but he loves fucking in the office just as much as I do (all screen caps from 'Kira's Captain' by @shadowsnlace - AMAZING READ, and requested by ME 😌Highly recommended, especially if you're an Izuru girlie🩵💙*permission to post granted*)

💍Authority kink??🤭⇣

📸:

💍"A full head taller than you", good gracious 😮‍💨

💍He loves the visual of me sucking him off with my glasses on ⇣

📸:

💍More authority kink⇣

📸:

----

That's it for now! I have a playlist planned out that will be listed under '💍ballroom' on my pinned post.

Please let me know your thoughts in the comments!🫶

@enchantedforest-network

[bluebellhairpin]

Hi Nemo! If you're willing, can you tell me about your selfship with Arthur? 👉👈 My husband IRL has played RDR and RDR2, but I feel like I still know next to nothing about him/his world, and I want to know how you fit into it! It's evident that he makes you happy, and I'd love to talk to you more about him, I just don't know where to start!

Love you, hope you're having a good day 🩶

"It's evident that he makes you happy" OMG YOU NOTICED 🥺🥺🥺

Anyway, oc/selfship lore dump below bc I could bet money that this is gonna get long lol

So like all my selfships, I like to throw together a little self insert oc to match - makes things more immersive imo.

This one is only known as Red. She's quiet and keeps to herself a lot. She doesn't partake in a lot of gang activities as far as the outlaw side of things go.

Like's to keep herself as honest as possible. She does learn to hunt after a while, and that helps her bring in money bc she sells most of what she kills. She attempted to learn pickpocketing off Mary-beth, but she "has too honest of a heart to fool anyone, they'd see (her) coming a mile away". So she sticks to keeping clean and straight as far as crimes go. She could turn to bounty hunting, but again - she doesn't really enjoy the risk of killing her bounty if things turned bad, so she avoids that too.

She also had a buckskin stallion called Leroy who is her little baby boy who can do no wrong, and who she pampers SO BAD. He's actually quite cuddly, and very protective of her.

If Red was a character in-game, she'd probably join the gang's girls in venturing into Valentine during 'Polite Society, Valentine Style'. Actually I can imagine her being someone who latches on as someone who joins in on missions rather than having any specific to her like other characters. She definitely plays a role as one of the main cast in the epilogue with John - if she had a solo mission with the player it'd probably be during that time.

Her relationship with Arthur though, following in-game canon, is so tricky. Like Arthur has. Trauma. Both his past canon relationships left him a bit messed up. Eliza died, and Mary left him - and and like it's messed with his self esteem so bad lol. So I can see both him and Red skirting around 'will they wont they' for a very long time - maybe even only deciding to comfort it at the very end of the game when Arthur's trying to 'fix' everything while he's still alive. Like there's a definite fondness, maybe even favoritism, between the two and it would definitely show though when they interacted. A lot of untapped potential - painfully so - if they weren't both so emotionally constipated.

Honestly the best part of the canon-esque storyline is post game. (AND IS ALSO WHY I THINK THIS HAS SEVERLY UNTAPPED PLOY SHIP POTENTIAL!!!) Her and Charles Smith wander off to Canada and use their mutual fondness of Arthur as a gateway to a really good relationship. They settle down on some land, get married, and start a family. They're each other's 'no one else understands what I've been though or how I feel except you' person. They both lost Arthur, and he does kind of haunt them - they name their first child, a daughter, Morgan, for him. (I think the relationship progress with Charles lies a lot with how straightforward I see him coming across as - in my head he doesn't hide how he feels so much, and by then Red has a lot of regret about not acting soon enough with Arthur, so she's a lot more willing to act by that point too.)

AND FIREND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON MY MORDEN AU THOUGHTS. They're a lot less sad, BUT GOOD GRIEF. SO MUCH MORE HORNY.

[ntls-24722]

i haven't drawn regular djmm with The Nose™ in a while. so i did, with the huge amount of time i had in my hands

i've been leaning towards the incanon djmm nose recently but i've noticed that random bits of my stylization still keep bleeding into the "bible accurate" way i draw djmm? i think thats just a little funny

i keep trying to think of ways how I'd even manage to fix all 393 of them in the weird mental selfship universe (including the three bastards) and i'm thinking it would have to be this massive project i'd have to take on because I'd have to fix all of them AND make new plastic coverings (on account of the fact they are ALL fucked up, but not only that, but I feel like the windups would kind of.... get attached to their current fucked up appearance? Like their scars and their Fucked Up ness is what individualizes them and makes them recognizable even if they are detrimental so I'd have to also work around that with casings that look fucked up but are functional.

and. by the by. i don't know what this weird selfship universe is. it's not fnaf. Like, with however weird and off-universe SOS is, it still uses fundamentals from fnaf, just in a really weird way. This doesn't, it's not fnaf. It is just a weird biproduct of my pining and any random desire or thought becomes a Thing like "man i wish he was small and i could kiss him" [he becomes small so i can kiss him] but instead of one off drawings it does kind of fall under a big umbrella of "this is still in [world]"

i still kind of just wanna call it "my head". that is the official name now. "my head"

comet smushes him in his hand like a hampster

spooky mcmm! :D

Bonus Cameron + Woolfe doodles

Fun fact: Woolfe didn't think Cameron was real for a very long time, and that he was a creation of the Subterranean Maze Matrix (i realize i spelled that wrong oops). He still tries to make sure that he is real since he still isn't very sure

bonus bonus: cameron's computer is a reference to this

he probably would've had a thing with his computer at one point, too

[princess-hope-selfships]

I have a few selfship children, like, kids I had with an f/o but they've been mostly in my head and I think I'm going to make a post about them to give them concrete identities, this is gonna be long and mostly for my reference pfft

My Kids with Elliott

Primrose and Salvador!!! Primrose is the eldest. In my head she's about 8, and Salvador is maybe 3 or 4.

Primrose is a rambunctious little child, loves to play pretend, very imaginative and curious!

She LOVES the animals on the farm, tries to spend time with them, sometimes even ends up bothering them lmao she will sometimes get in trouble for stressing them out by trying to play with them I think

Takes a leader role when she's playing with Salvador

Salvador is also super rambunctious, often gets into places he shouldn't 'cause he's just so damn small and fast lmao

Salvador eagerly follows Primrose everywhere, he thinks she's so cool and wants to be just like her.

Sometimes Primrose gets him in trouble or tries to frame him for things she did, the crafty lil kid

Salvador is scared of most of the animals 😂 He LOVES the cat though, and he's the only one the cat tolerates bothering her like that, to the point of cuddling up with Salvador on her own accord

They are loved by everyone in town!!!! Because I yearn for idyllic small town life. Primrose especially likes Haley and Emily, she likes Haley's fashion sense and loves when she does makeup on her. She really likes Emily's energy and the weird stuff she does. Salvador really likes Gus, always wants to get dinner at the Saloon. Gus loves Salvador's appetite and willingness to try new foods, and always gives him free snacks. Salvador also really likes Shane for some reason??? I think he thinks Shane's standoffishness means that he's shy so he wants to make him feel included lmao

My Kids with Sidon

Thresher and Frill our beloved little zora babies 🥺

They exist in the AU where I become a Zora via a Zora mask like in Maj/ora's Ma/sk, blah blah blah

Thresher and Frill hatched together on the same day only minutes apart. Thresher hatched first.

Thresher is a wild child, very loud and excitable like his father

Frill is a shy kid, a little soft-spoken and very clingy to her parents

Thresher is super protective of Frill but also wants her to come with him on his little adventures!

Though I do think Thresher sometimes gets in trouble for picking on his sister. He can be a little shit sometimes, I think lol he takes things away from her so he can look at it or play with it, and plays keepaway

But if anyone else does that stuff to her he gets really upset and might even get into fights with them

Thresher is also super protective of me, I think, even from Sidon sometimes when Sidon and I are roughhousing or he's picking on me for being short or something pffft Thresher run in like I'LL SAVE YOU MAMA

Thresher thinks his dad is SO COOL and he's right but yeah FDSFH SUPER IDOLIZES HIS DAD !!!

Thresher looks up to Dorephan too, and loves to hear his stories about his feats as the previous king. He loves to hear about Zora history. He probably asks Sidon to recount his own experiences as a bedtime story.

Frill is so creative and so smart, she loves to make her own little pieces of jewelry and she loves gemstones. She collects rocks that she finds, whether or not they're gems, she just has a rock collection and she loves to talk about her rocks and what she named them and makes up stories about them. Of course, we all listen super intently.

Possible Kid with Demyx???

I've had a thought about having a child with Demyx ahfkdjsh he means so much to me and I can kind of imagine us having a kid eventually...

I remember having a fankid designed when I was in high school and selfshipped with Demyx lmao and his name was August, inspired by the film Aug/ust R/ush... idk if I would do that again but I'm considering it..?

They would be such an imaginative little child... with two artists for parents, I think they are just downright wacky and creative and fun and we just absolutely love them and we encourage that creativity so much.

They eagerly learn music and how to play instruments with Demyx!!! Maybe even write him songs and get super excited to play them for him!!

They are genderfluid like their dad!!!

THEY LOVE SORA SOOOOO MUCHHHH I think Sora would be such a wonderful big brother figure to them!!!

[weird-dere-writes]

Good morning! I love you💖

I am humbly requesting more Ichidere lore please. 🙏🏾

Where do you guys live?

Do you have any pets?

Who cooks more?

Who cleans more?

Do you guys want babiessss?

I need to know MORE.

Good morrow, Sunflower :3 🫶🏾💛💛💛

I would love to talk about more Ichidere lore with u uwu <3.

Where do you guys live?

We live in a nice house in Japan with a gate in the front. It's a large one story abode with a pretty garden. It is quite licherally this house, but i hate the front of that house so we're gonna pretend the outside looks like the one below.

also below are a few photos from angles not included in the link :3

Do you have any pets?

To be honest I never really thought about this one before 👀. But i think it would be nice to have at least one owo. And y'know what our pet would be??? A HEDGEHOG. Specifically an African Pygmy Hedgehog (the ones people have as pets!). THEY ARE MY FAVORITE LITTLE GUYS EVER!! 🥺🦔

(if i could have one as a pet irl i SO would, but it is not allowed in my state RIP).

Look at these little GUYS!!!! LOOK AT HIM STANCE :((((( <3

AND IF I GOT AN ALBINO HEDGIE AND NAMED HIM KATSUKI???? FUSSY LITTLE DUDE WHO HISSES A LOT??? (Their hisses are literally just aggressive sniffing btw lmao they are SOOOOOO cute)

LOOK AT HIM EEP 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺. And hedgie snores are so fuckin adorable 😭

Who cooks more?

I'd say we come pretty close to cooking the same amount! But I think I cook just sliiiiightly more. Also I do some baking, which he doesn't tend to do owo.

But I like the idea of us spending time in the kitchen together <3

Like maybe sometimes he'll help me bake or we both experiment when making a meal together.

I also also looooove the idea of him teaching me how to make more Japanese or Asian foods! Since, coming from America, I of course grew up making more western foods and Americanized Asian foods.

AUGH imagining his first time trying so many of the foods I love. Like Black soul foods I grew up eating 🥺. And he just loves them so much. So when the seasons are right we work together to go hunting for the needed ingredients which aren't as easy to come by in Japan 🥺🥺🥺.

Also idk about his spice tolerance but uuuuhhh... If it ain't too great we're gonna have to get them numbers up 👀👀👀👀👀 LMAO little by little uwu

Who cleans more?

We both clean, but I feel like I take care of the smaller things and let Ichigo take care of the bigger things if that makes sense?

Like I keep our kitchen pretty clean. There are never dishes in the sink on my watch. And I'm always wiping down the counters n table after someone eats. I also wipe down our sinks and mirrors in the bathroom with each use. Vacuum rooms in the house every once in a while.

I know how to clean the showers and toilets, but I tend to procrastinate on it bc its so much WORK, so Ichi usually takes care of it. Sweeping and mopping the whole house is something we do together, but because it's also so big a task I typically kinda avoid doing it for long periods. So Ichigo usually has to initiate it.

We both take care of the garbage, but most times I am gathering everything inside that needs to be taken out then Ichi is the one to bring it outside (bc i am a somewhat a germaphobe hELP).

As far as laundry, Ichi washes his clothes more often and I wash the bedsheets more often. A bitch will procrastinate the hell out of washing and putting away her own clothes AUGH. So Ichi makes it an activity we do together so it isn't as painful enourhnuiohbneiokr.

Do you guys want babiessss?

Yes indeed we do want babies <333333

Since most of this talk has been surrounding the proposal, they have not come yet BUT in the ichidere selfshipping multiverse, over the years I've been building it, he and I have come to have 5 kids in total :3

You can learn a little more belowwwwww uwu + mention of the kiddies (amongst other ichidere nuggets) + baby names! + Ichigo as a dad (amongst other nuggets about him)

Thank you for stopping by to learn more uwu. Your hunger for my self ship is so so encouraging for sharing my self indulgence <33333.

Kith 😘💋💋💋💋

[my-gf-is-kazuichi-soda]

Kind of a drabble about adding Miu to my romantic f/os

I've never been so indecisive about adding a (romantic) f/o.

like. I even used to selfship with Wario (even though I never blogged about it. that was one of my earliest selfships).

but...

like...

nggh! on the one hand, Miu is mean, and gross. on the other hand, she's lonely and self-destructive, and I want to make sure she's alright. she's already our friend that we check up on a lot, and got Mikan and Shuichi and Kaede to check up on her too, and we all ended up peer pressuring her to stop turning to drugs or other self-destructive tendencies because she couldn't stop picturing our "sad little faces" (I was touched when Kaz told me she said that. I hadn't asked her to stop doing drugs, the topic makes me feel too awkward, but the others had and I guess with how worried we all were about her, it made her want to work on herself.) But she still seems lonely, and also jealous of a lot of her friends dating each other, especially me and Kaz and Tenko.

so uh, maybe we could fix her with kisses.

(or maybe she'd make us worse? lol)

also, the chaotic potential of adding Miu to the group is hilarious. (in hindsight, the anon that asked me about adding Toko to the group was almost prophesizing 👀).

I've...already got headcanons for her with our kids... I think I trapped myself with this...

like, of all the things to push me to this brink...

(this is so random) have you ever seen Defunctland: The Awful Wiggles Dark Ride?

I found myself thinking about me, Kaz, and Tenko bringing our three kids when they're all still little on this ride (let's pretend it's still in operation, or maybe it got abandoned but it's still there and Kazuichi could get it in working order. So could Miu tbh.)

I couldn't picture us riding this without Miu there as well. We would all enjoy it, mostly because of the kids (I feel like Miu would have the most childlike wonder about it and Kazuichi would still be rambling about the technical stuff an hour later. Especially if it was the broken version where the tvs or rooms would be on/off at the wrong times. Tenko would be the least likely to enjoy the ride itself (which is like me as well, but I've at least got a little nostalgia for the Wiggles), but she's got an excited toddler bouncing on her lap, so she's pretty focused on that.

So after imagining that, I ended up coming up with headcanons about Miu with our kids.

When the first baby (Ren) is born, Miu is the clingiest out of all of us to this baby and keeps saying they're "the spittin' image of me!" (meaning herself). This is false, the baby's bio parents are me and Kaz and they very much look like a combination of us two. Still, we know this is Miu's way of saying she adores this baby. We're not worried about her being unhealthily attached though; she's still pretty busy with invention ideas and always hands the baby back to one of us when she needs to go work on those, or when we ask her to (but only me, Kaz, and Tenko. She glares at anyone else who asks to hold the baby, lol.)

(Pregnancy, and specifically fictional trans woman pregnancy mentioned in next paragraph. Not sure if anyone needs that as a trigger warning, but just in case. I know pregnancy in general can bring up complicated feelings for people).

I was pregnant with the first baby and picked out the name Ren (who later came out as nonbinary). Tenko was pregnant with the second baby, a girl, and picked out the name Aimi. Miu was able to transfer the third pregnancy to herself and become one of the first pregnant trans women in the world (I feel like it is pretty in-character for her to not only try this but end up being successful. Let me dream okay?) She also had a baby girl. We all asked Miu first if she had a name in mind, but Miu didn't want to pick a name and likes most of the names we suggest anyway. Kazuichi picked the name Yoshi. So our kids are Ren, Aimi, and Yoshi.

Not sure when/if I'll draw fanart and write stories for all of this (maybe the Wiggles car ride though), I feel weird about selfshipping with Miu and Tenko even though I'm still writing the fanfic about just me and Kaz (and that fanfic will definitely take a while). But I'm holding myself to ridiculous standards. I can ship with them just because. I also worry about being unfair by focusing on Kazuichi the most, but I know it's okay to have a main f/o.

[two-person-job]

assigning songs from my latest romance playlist to mine and my friends' selfships :}

@lexisism @milk-violet @floraldresvi

it got a lot longer than I thought. so. have fun! <3

best friend - laufey

kavexis or verali. definitely an alexis selfship. the parts that are more about how you're best friends reminds me of kavexis, but the parts that are lovingly insulting feels more reminiscent of verali

magnolia - laufey

this song is about yoimiya. or it's mizuha and it's kazuha thinking about mirei. a lot of this song feels more like poetry than lyrics?? which leads me to say that kazuha would hear it whenever he sees mirei.

death, thrice drawn - the scary jokes

baivi? verali? I can't really place this one. but. when I think selfships with lots of pining, baivi and verali come to mind!!

jeanine - the scary jokes

kavexis angst where both alexis and kaveh are feeling overwhelmed and end up kinda neglecting each other. with the line "love is just a name for you to call me by", this song talks about how though they are still acting in love, the feelings are starting to fade. it also goes into someone being emotionally absent, and not being vulnerable enough for the other. both people are stuck in a space between "I can't find time to talk to them" and "they can't find time to talk to them", and lots of conflicting "it's my fault/I shouldn't be to blame here" thoughts. one of the last lines is "just like the smote cedars in the yard, I have fallen so hard for you" which shows that yes, they are in love. yes, they adore their s/o. but. it's not a love that is gentle anymore, it's hard to live with and difficult to manage. very "I love you, but at what cost?"

starstruck - the scary jokes

this song has a permanent spot in my shroomsym playlist for a myriad of reasons!!!! firstly. sylvia is being depicted as a figure who shows enough to be admired, but never enough to be known. that's sym for a while!! and the entire song is just someone gushing and wondering about her.

no leverage / no pleasure - the scary jokes

scarayui because of the "I just can't have a normal heart" line and all that's added onto that. with all the scaramouche lore I know very little about, I believe this fits his character? loving, despite it being against his nature? but since yui isn't on tumblr anymore. this is actually really hard wait. this could lead off of the kavexis angst from "jeanine"?? i'll go with that dfjdjdfk

crushed out on soda beach - the scary jokes

shroomiya angst because. the first lines "I tried just burning the whole thing down today / but decisiveness is such a foreign tenant to my psyche" represents someone trying to break up with their partner, but being too indecisive to do so. later on in the song, it goes "you called my bluff / I love you too much / would you please stay with me? / cause after all is said and done / I want you here, stay with me!" this song is representative of wanting the end of the bad parts of a relationship, but not the good parts. it's about wanting the relationship you used to have, wanting to go back to when everything was normal and better than normal because it was beautiful. "I could hardly stand under the weight of my little crush on you" shows how much yearning can take a toll on someone.

bets against the void - the scary jokes

baivi angst this time. "these days your light beam penetrate / the sorrowed skin that i've been living in". baizhu's condition is getting worse, but vi and everyone else's love and care for him motivates him to try to be everything he could be. "but still I wait for piercing pain / i'll feel when your feelings fade / I feel so good today" he knows that all of the good he feels now is temporary. when vi's gone, or busy, or tired, or sick herself, he feels worse. but how is he supposed to push that onto her? when they both feel so good today, isn't that all that can really matter? "the sun is just a copper coin / I flip in bets against the void / imitating choice / 'til I feel good again / i'll keep them in a tin can / then i'll have copper coins to spend" baizhu's trying to find optimism in vi, in qiqi, in everyone who comes to bubu pharmacy, and he is, he really is, but it's getting difficult to find much more meaning in that optimism. he has all of the little memories from people he's known and loved and cared for, but he doesn't have much to do with them. "will you remember me / when our spirits scatter off?" will you remember him, when he can't remember you? when he isn't there? when he can't be everything you deserve? when he loses all he was? "I know I'm an artist / 'cause I just can't stand the thought / that a love as beautiful as ours / could be forgotten" he knows you'll never forget. and that's just why he wants you too. he wants you to be able to move on a live a life as amazing as it always was. but he also knows that you won't be able to do that. so he will make sure you remember your love as beautiful, and make sure to pass it on to everyone you continue to meet.

anata no koibito ni naritai - choo kyuu mei

MIZUHA!!!!! "koi ni ochite iru" THAT DAY I FELL IN LOVE! "kocchi wo mite yo!" LOOK THIS WAY! "choco yori amai! ondo de tokeru!" SWEETER THAN CHOCOLATE, YOUR WARMTH MAKES ME MELT! ik the translation is rough but!!!! KOI NI OCHITE IRU!!!! THAT DAY I FELL IN LOVE!!! KOIBITO NI NARITAI! I WANT TO BE YOUR PARTNER! I want to make a mizuha animatic of you two falling in love.. and being in love.. and that day you fell in love!

also dreszhu. though I know little about it, I like the idea of baizhu seeing dresvi and going "OMG SHES SO BEAUTIFUL" before regaining his composure lol

what will you leave behind (end titles) - max LL and maude plante-husaruk

spiritfarer is everything to me. BUT this song feels like shroomsym and baivi!! for shroomsym, sym is immortal. there is a way to become immortal with him! this song is about loss, about moving on, about grief, and about getting over it and learning how to lovingly remember instead of feeling constant grief. immortality comes with watching the death of all your favorite people, but the last line "but it's ok, we'll be together my friend" would be how sym would be there through it all.

with baivi though!!! baivi is the sort of couple that goes through and sees everything. they grow old together, watch friends come and go, watch relationships blossom and deteriorate, see the landscape around them shift and change, and learn every little thing they can, and more. they guide each other through every difficulty, every problem they may ever have. and they make their own world, out of love and beauty and patches of everyone and everything in their lives. baivi is a couple that grows old together.

hikouki gumo - yumi arai

kavexis. alexis gets to see all of kaveh's dreams up close, everything he wants and everything he does to reach those wants. hikouki gumo is the ending song of "the wind rises", about an aeronautical engineer (I think?) who falls in love with a woman with tuberculosis. though he stays with her as much as possible, she doesn't survive. however, they get to love in the most beautiful ways possible. they love in paper airplanes, they love in carefully-chosen gifts, they love in dropping everything to see each other, they love in spite of everything that encourages them not to. they love no matter what may happen. that's kavexis to me, passion and dreams and unconditional love. kaveh would do anything for alexis, and all she wants is for him to love her. "i've loved you since the wind brought you to me" is my favorite quote from that movie, and I think it suits kavexis :}

itsudemo dare ka ga - shang shang typhoon

sunvi? this is the ending song of "pom poko", and is playing during a lot of friends reuniting. I feel like sunvi is about never truly being apart, only in different places. this song talks about never forgetting the name of the people who loved you. sunvi is about remembering. remembering favorites and dislikes, anniversaries and birthdays, names and relations. everything that matters, and everything that doesn't. because if it's connected to someone you love, is anything really insignificant?

le temps des cerises - cora vaucaire

this is a song that plays in "porco rosso"! the woman that sings it in in love with the main character, though he feels as if he will never be good enough for anything. he has too much guilt about his past mistakes, and doesn't want anything bad to befall someone he cares about, so he stops caring. but she persists, and I think that's very reminiscent of a possible mizuha or pantalovi au. for mizuha, kazuha feels as if he isn't stable enough for relationships. also everything that happened with tomo, he doesn't want that to happen to mirei. but she doesn't care. all she cares for is kazuha, and that's what matters to her. slowly, she teaches kazuha that she loves him with all the risks he may see in being close to someone. as long as they get to be together, she'll be happy, and so will he. pantalovi has something similar, with how pantalone is in the fatui and all. how could that end up in safety for vi? how could he make sure she'd be ok? by not involving himself with her, is his first thought. but similar to mirei, vi is persistent! she will love freely! and he will have to learn to accept that. and he does, because he loves her. pantalone will make sure NOTHING bad ever happens to vi, who appreciates the sentiment, but once again similar to mirei, won't mind what happens as long as she is with him.

socks - out of luck

MY FAVORITE SONG FOR SHROOMIYA!!!! "what's up? how you been? / I wanna be so much more than friends!" lots of realizing you're in love and wanting to confess and not being good at telling someone you love them but trying anyways!! wanting to be with someone forever and never being forgotten and sharing things that only you and them know! yoimiya reminds me of giggling into pillows at a sleepover, and that's what this song also feels like!! failed confessions and flustered glances!!

i do adore - mindy gledhill

baivi. vi is so deeply in love with baizhu that him just asking her about her day makes her a blushing mess!!! they're different in so many ways, but not in a way that sparks argument, in a way of someone who's always cold has someone who's always warm!! they compliment each other in such a personal way, it feels as if they were made for each other!! no matter how many times vi fails at telling baizhu how she feels, or how much he means to her, he understands. he is able to tell by the absolute adoration radiating off of her, that all her words are laced with love.

sakura kiss - chieko kawabe

i put the ohshc intro on here because of who this playlist is about jhsdjh. but also mizuha kavexis and shroomiya are all couples who would shout these lyrics at a sleepover turned karaoke night. KISS KISS FALL IN LOVE!

pretty girl - clairo

high school au baivi, kavexis, and shroomiya. helpless girls + kaveh who'd do anything for their favorite person.

for baivi, vi would see him in the halls, and it'd start off as just a little hallway crush. but she'd find herself constantly looking for him, trying to find out what he likes, what he doesn't, who he's close with, who he isn't. she's writing him little love notes to stick in his locker, and though she's been found doing this by a multitude of people, none have told baizhu!! she thinks. one day, one day, she'll find the courage to tell him how she feels. (and one day, one day, baizhu will find the courage to strike up a conversation with you) this could also work with sunvi + pantalovi but I think it's cuter with baivi <3

for kavexis this song fills my brain with the image of kaveh in fluffy pajamas and looking at his phone, which has a message from alexis that says something like "thank you!!" and he's blushing because SHE saw worth in HIM and thinks that HE was worth not one, but TWO. WHOLE. EXCLAMATION POINTS!!! they might as well have gotten married already!!! kaveh is so hopeless and in love with Alexis, and thinks that she's so out of his league!! but she thinks the same about him. so they're both stuck in the pining stage with a VERY annoyed alhaitham.

for shroomiya. I would do anything for her!! I'll make her snacks!! this is affection in the form of simple acts of love that are filled with adoration, mistakes made to make someone laugh, and endearing habits belonging to someone you love. I could be her pretty girl!!!

kool - meet me @ the altar

honestly? kavexis. both of them think that the other is so cool! that the other should look in the mirror and think about how beautiful they are! both are such daydreamers, and could spend the entire day just thinking about the other. but they'd much prefer being with them, thinking about them is a good temporary substitute. pining and doesn't know the other feels just like them!!

cat serenade - beetlebug

MIZUHA MIZUHA MIZUHA MIZUHA!!!!! "I've never been the kind to fall in love / it's just me and a couple of fleas and that's all I want" HE NEVER WANTED TO STAY IN JUST ONE PLACE BUT IF IT MEANS ANOTHER DAY WITH YOU HED STAY A CENTURY! kazuha slowly realizes again what it's like to find a home not in a place but in a person, and finds himself imagining all the places he'll go with mirei. he'd go fishing with mirei. go to liyue with beidou and mirei. search for flowers for mirei. everything has mirei added on, and honestly? he doesn't mind. he could use a couple more years of his life, if it means those years will be with you.

honey jet coaster - nasuo and route BLUE - yuki nakashima and kawaii dake ja nai - nasuo

shikimori intro and outro. and the shikimori-themed song. that means baivi. highschool au baivi again where everything with vi or baizhu apart of it is beautiful! everything has to be about the other, and if it's not, then they'll find a way to make it!! every single thing baizhu does is endearing. every bite of food vi takes baizhu finds himself smiling at. ik I compare you to shikimori a lot vi but I think it would be reversed? like. yes ur like shikimori. but for the Cool Person/sweetie who's madly in love with the Cool Person dynamic of shikimori and izumi, baizhu would be the shikimori. while baizhu is always making sure that vi is ok, that she doesn't accidentally hurt herself, that she isn't overworking herself, she's making sure that he doesn't have to worry!! vi's doing everything she can to take care of herself so baizhu doesn't have to constantly worry himself over her, but he still does. and whenever vi tries to bring up possibly being a nuisance to him, he shuts it down before she can get the full sentence out. he worries because he loves her. he worries because she matters to him. he couldn't imagine a world without her, and doesn't want to.

every little thing - cybergirlfriend

shroomiya and mizuha. mirei would GUSH about everything kazuha does!! his handwriting, the way his voice gets softer when he talks directly to her, the way he looks at her with a warm smile after grabbing her hand.. anything and everything she can think of!! and I'm never going to have an empty mind when yoimiya's around. it's always full of thoughts of her!!! <33

biri-biri - yoasobi

i can't say yoasobi without also saying mirei. which is why this is another mizuha song. she's waiting!! she's hoping!! she's anticipating what kazuha will say, do, and everything else about him!!! when will she see him again? what will he say next? where is he right now? when will he hold her hand again? she's always wondering!! and he always has the answer, and it's always "whenever and whatever you want".

shake & shake - sumia

this is the intro to a really weird anime that me and someone else are watching together so I put it on the playlist. anyways this is shroomiya. we'd watch the anime together and laugh at how weird and i'd teach her the choreography in the intro <3

chicken noodle - small crush

kavexis? verali? for kavexis, kaveh is the mess. nothing goes right for him, except for alexis. she's the right in his world of wrongs. when he falls in the mud, she picks him back up and cleans him up. when he loses something, she spends hours helping him find it. he's a mess, but you're the best.

for verali it's swapped. I love you alexis but from what I know of verali you'd be the mess <3 she struggles with falling asleep on time, and he texts her at exactly 10:30pm to go to bed without being prompted to do so. he brushes her hair when she forgets to. he always makes sure that her working space is clean. whenever alexis asks him why, he tells her that he's just doing the bare minimum.

signal dreams - small crush

shroomsym!! "i would rather be living in a dream / if that's the only way I could get close to you" anything for you! everything for you! dedicating your days to someone who doesn't know that you think of them the amount that you do! doing things for someone that they'll never know of! picturing yourself with someone you think will never look your way again!!! he's a dream, and i'm doing fine asleep.

freshman year - small crush

sunvi. vi getting her view on everything skewed. she's having to get used to a new life, a new place, new people and nothing she can do to make the scenario more comfortable. but sunday can do something. so he does, and makes her feel as welcome as he can. he makes sure that she is loved properly, and cared for in the way she needs to be. "but I wish I knew then what I know now" if only she always knew how much sunday would do for her. (he'd do anything)

rumblin tummy - small crush

i swear I didn't plan for it to end like this but. tbh. this fits with everyone.

shroomiya: similar feelings to socks!! i'd never waste a day if it's spent with you! <3 no emotions are useless, no words are meaningless, because they're for her. everything is about her. everything is for her.

baivi: days upon days upon weeks months years and lifetimes spent with each other. spent sighing and dreaming and falling in love too many times to count, and then falling in love again!!! finding new ways to say I love you every day, and new ways to reciprocate.

kavexis: kavexis actually really feels like a couple who has a lot of accidental synchronization!! complimenting outfits, texting each other at the same time, confessions piling over each other because you were both so adamant that the other spoke first.

mizuha: making sure that the other is always cared for. during any absence, any reason for not being together, they are both always secure and excited to see each other again. and they always do, they always, always reunite.

shroomsym: I'm never ever going to be free from him, and honestly, I don't mind. I'd waste all my time finding him, talking to him, and thinking about him while I'm not with him.

sunvi: making space for each other, making time for each other, anything to accommodate to your beloved. because that's what you are to each other. everything you do, is in honor of them. sunvi feels like the type of couple to always be intertwined with each other, when you see sunday, vi is not too far behind. when you see vi, sunday was just making his way over with a bag of food and a kiss for the crown of vi's head.

verali: though he may deny it at times, veritas lives for all of alexis' mannerisms. everything she does fills him with love. everything she says makes him so, so happy. he'd really love it if he were able to just be with her for the rest of his life.

pantalovi: he always makes sure that vi is taken care of, because that is always the top priority. vi is everything to him, and he's everything to her. how could either of them be any less? when all of their spare time is spent on the other, how could there ever be any doubts that their love is less than unconditional and absolute?

[scribblyshipping]

Welcome, welcome!

Hi!! I am Scribbly, Scrib, or any nickname variation! I am 20 years old and the only pronouns I use are she/her.

My main blog is @scribbly07 and is where I follow from.

I've been selfshipping for about 7 years, though this is the first time I've really tried to be involved in the community. I'd love to make some friends here, as I've been watching some really cool artists from afar for a while now!

With that being said, feel free to message me whenever!! I really want to make some friends.

Currently, I am okay with doubles. This may change in the future.

I am okay with most doubles. However, please do not interact if you selfship with Pim Pimling or Charlie Dompler from Smiling Friends. If we were moots and I blocked you, feel free to DM my main and I'll unblock if there's a tag I can block.

Close mutuals with doubles are okay. I want to get comfortable with the idea of doubles for them and I think that’s a good place to start. Please be patient with me… 😓

I switch F/Os a lot and will try to update the list as often as I can!! Characters I am closest with at the moment are in bold+underline.

The list is organized in alphabetical order by fandom first then character name.

The easiest way to find any specific character is searching for the character's name and not the fandom, since I abbreviate some of the fandom names.

💜💜💜My F/O List💜💜💜

Tag Guide:

#scribbly says: Original posts

#scribbles: Original art

#letters: Answered asks

#others art: you'll never guess

I also have tags for all of my sonas, which I won't list here, but they all start with "OC:" and then their name.

Ship Tag Guide (W.I.P.):

Note: Not all of my f/os have ship names yet, check above for full f/o list!

#extended vacation: Scribbly + Audie [Playlist]

#love bug: Heart + Spamton [Playlist]

#scribblesandwich: Scribble Scrabble + Cheese Sandwich

#shiningscrabble: Scribble Scrabble + Shining Armor

#complementary colors / #chibbly: (Critter) Scribbly + Charlie Dompler

#pibbly: (Critter) Scribbly + Pim Pimling

#chimbly: (Critter) Scribbly + Pim Pimling + Charlie Dompler

Not sure what else to list, but I hope you enjoy my blog!!

[woahjo]

hi! you can totally ignore this if you don't want to reply for whatever reason, but i still wanted to ask since i'm curious on other peoples perspective

i've never been one to self-ship (or at least not directly, like i def had some fics written with self insertion without realizing or made up scenarios in my head but never really put the label on it)

And I thought on why I did not want that label of self-ship put on my fav characters and myself, and ig my conclusion is that it just hurts me to put it in a way? like for me its a constant remind that they're fictional, which honestly hurts more than just doing a selfinserted fic and that's it, because once i finish the fic it's just another piece of media, nothing more to me, and i detach

but if i try to push myself to do something cute for self-shipping since everyone seems so content with it, i can't find myself doing the same because of what i just said, like even calling my favs f/o makes me feel a bit like shit lol. and tbh i think most people would disagree with me since what i see 99% of the time is people using selfshipping as a pastime or use it to cope but how do you manage to not hurt yourself when you remember it's only fictional? because i want to achieve that as well without getting myself hurt in the process.

so sorry for this being so long btw, i wanted to explain myself as best as i could

hi anon!!!

i understand you completely!! i think the bottom line of it is that if you don't like it, then don't do it, ya know? i don't mean that in the like "get out of here!!" sense, i mean it more so in the like.. if thinking inside of what the "box" might be for self-shipping, why not try thinking outside of it?

i know for me, i don't actually imagine my selfships to be "real" in any way. yes, my selfships are with me, but it's a version of me that more closely aligns with a story im writing about their relationship. i've noticed a lot of people have decently set lore with their selfships, but that personally doesn't work for me, so i tend to think in a more abstract way when it comes to lore. broad strokes, ya know?

im not sure if this makes sense, but my "selfships" often feel more like reading a book or watching a tv show with a pairing i really like than they do myself. the version of me that they're with is a character and i enjoy thinking about how that version of me might be paired with them, but they're never a full reflection of me. that's the sort of selfshipping that makes me happy. yeah sure, i don't really get to take part in the "what's your selfship lore!!!" conversations as in depth as i might want to, but that's just not part of what makes selfshipping enjoyable to me.

if i thought about my selfships as real, life sized human beings, i would also get SO sad they're not real, so i tend to imagine them as like... living in rooms in my head rather than something i can imagine in front of me. idk if that's how everyone thinks about their selfships, but that's how i do it!!! i carry the scenarios around in my pocket like bugs in a handheld terrarium.

as an aside,,, when it comes to writing, my reader is almost never a self insert. they have bits and pieces of me, but they're not a reflection of how my selfships tend to go. they are their own characters, just without a name or physical description. and it's purely for a similar reason. i'm not a novel protagonist. i don't have that sort of personality and sometimes it can bum me out to try and fit myself into a box that i think other people might enjoy (because that's not the real me).. so i don't! same goes for my selfships

anyway, all of this to say that if the box doesn't fit, out grow it. the nice thing about selfshipping is that there is no right way to do it and if thinking about it in the traditional way trips u up because it makes u sad that they're not real, switch up how you think about it :))

[bandtrees]

hello o//

i heard you had a fursona and i was curious to know about them if you’re willing to share :]

(/nf of course)

oh of course!!! :]] here he is!

i <3 robot furries so he's a robot dog! i based him most obviously off of transformers (specifically idw tailgate and ironfist) (named kibble both cuz dog and cuz that's the term in transformers fandom for extraneous robot-parts that don't serve much purpose on a 'human' body ie wheels etc) but i also wanted to, in 2024 redesigning him for this ref sheet, make him a bit easier to follow as an anthro dog design and able to be worked into furry stuff, while still being visibly mechanical ^_^

in the ways of lore i really don't have much for him - honestly he's just a standin for myself - but i have the concept that he was made to be a sort of living computer. genius database, future of technology, etc... but his storage capacity's small and his scope of interests even smaller, so he doesn't really have much actually technically helpful knowledge... he does, however, have encyclopedic levels of knowledge about nonsense things like tvtropes and trivia for whatever show he's into now.

(^really this is just a way (FOR ME PERSONALLY i should say as i know 'autistic robot' is a bad stereotype for a reason) to express autism as that's what it feels like for me a lot of the time. having a lot of passion and drive to learn but only in the few things your brain's latched onto - and of course the social hurdles that will come with being a robot in 'human'(furry?) society)

he's very inexpressive - doesn't have pupils, doesn't blink, has no mouth (the robotic muzzle isn't a mask, it's just what his face looks like), and i imagine he speaks mechanically too (i waffle between making him mute, giving him a text-to-speech type thing, or limiting his communication to pulling up webpages haha)

he's also one of those fursonas that has a few different designs and such depending on the 'verse, i've drawn him in the context of transformers designs for selfshipping a few times (specifically w/ mtmte first aid, and moreso idw/es tarantulas) and i should do that again :] depending on the situation his design falls in many different places along the furry-mech scale lolol

to get real: i've been a furry and had fursonas since. like. im gonna say as far as 2008, since i was very small :]c but kibble's the first one in a long time i feel actually suits me in both a "feels like me" sense and a "fun character to draw with some degree of fun fantasy" - cuz for a long stretch of time, when i stopped being into sparklecats and the like as a teenager, i fell hard into the "truesona" type of furry designs...

...which, nothing wrong with those, but as someone with crummy self esteem, just kind of led to me hyperfocusing on myself as a kind of "boring slob" type of character. not interesting enough to be anything but a plainly colored realistic animal, and too self-conscious about my appearance to feel too comfortable straying from "fat, depressed, tired and messy slob", as to portray myself as anything but that felt dishonest.

until one day, and this was at the height of my transformers hyperfixation so i'd grown attached to very inhuman robot-y designs, i just kind of realized, "hey, if i wanted, i could make my sona anything i want, right? i like robots and my friends compare me to dogs, i could make a robot dog! i could have fun designing a mech anthro dog!" and. i did lol. and it's the happiest i've been with a fursona, both from a design standpoint and a 'me' standpoint :]]

thank you for the ask! sorry for suddenly getting so real, i don't think you expected me to, kibble as an oc just means a lot to me :'D

(i also have other, non-sona, furry ocs if you ever wanna hear about furry boy band drama lol. i only recently reopened asks again so i'm trying to get more comfortable with em despite my constant Inbox Paranoia. ty again!!)

[reflections-of-mobius]

Hello, and welcome to the pinned post! My name's Writer, and I'm the mun of this odd little multimuse.

☢ This blog will contain upsetting content from time to time- please make sure you have the proper tags blocked off just to be safe, but I will always try to leave disturbing content under a readmore and tag it appropriately. ☢

☢ This blog is 18+ only. The content here will range, and I don't feel like making an NSFW sideblog. It will, of course, be tagged for those who don't want to see it- but if you're under eighteen, for the love of sanity, stay away. ☢

☢ If you have a problem with self-inserts, selfships, powerful OCs, or incredibly AU Canons, then leave. ☢

[Rules | Muse Roster | Promo Post | Universes | Relationships]

As for me- I'm Writer, a twenty-three year old nonbinary mate (they/them) who's really just here to have fun, hang with friends, and build worlds. I identify as ficto (a subtype of the aro-ace club, yes I know how to separate fiction and reality, you're not original if you try to ask me that), and I'm a Pisces/INFJ/Metal Snake, for those who would want to inquire. I'm mostly a gamer and an anime fan, so I flip between playing games and watching television... A lot.

I've been diagnosed with Depression and Social/General Anxiety, and my friends tend to think I might have undiagnosed ADHD/BPD, but I have yet to be tested. I get overwhelmed pretty easily, and stress can make me totally shut down and go into hiding to recover. So if ever I suddenly vanish for a few days- it's nothing against you, I'm just recovering.

⚠️ I do not claim ownership of Mephiles the Dark, Dark Gaia, or Sonic the Hedgehog. I claim ownership of my personal spin on each character, as well as the headcanons I've made for all the worlds present here- but not for the base idea of 'Mobius', 'Chaos Emeralds', and things generally seen in the Sonic Franchise. ⚠️

⚠️ While I do claim ownership over Arwen Conch, Cinnamon Curl (and their pet cat Milky), Fin Freja, Node Gate, and Tempest Lock, I was not the one to come up with the designs for Cinnamon Curl and Fin Freja. I adopted the designs from kandaarts (here on Tumblr, Fin) , Blayris6 (on DeviantArt, Milky) and dart22345 (also on Deviantart, Cinnamon), respectively. Arwen Conch's design was made on a whim via this picrew. ⚠️

⚠️ This blog is 18+. If you are under eighteen, leave. I will (at times) roleplay sensitive topics, and smut may come up every here and there (mostly on Sunday/Sinday, if at all). I don't want minors to see that stuff. ⚠️

⚠️ This blog does have a selfship, as well as two self-inserts- and at times will delve into selfships. The OCs are all relatively powerful for their given worlds, and the self-inserts are given power on par with the canons. The canons (namely, Mephiles and Dark Gaia ) have been heavily rebuilt on this blog, and will not function as they would if you just pulled them from their given games. If you came here to interact with a sneaky Mephiles who hates your character, or a Dark Gaia that just wants to see the world burn, you will be disappointed. If you came here seeking target practice from OCs, you will be disappointed. If you came here to escape selfshipping, you will be disappointed. ⚠️

⚠️ Note: when I say 'selfshipping', I mean writing a self-insert and then shipping that SI with the characters in a given series. ⚠️

⚠️ DNI if: Nazi, pedophile, MAP, racist, homophobic, under eighteen, proship, don't 'believe' in mental illnesses, intolerant, hater of selfships, hater of OCs, hater of canon divergence. ⚠️

🔘 This blog runs on a queue system. For the most part, I will space out replies to post once a day unless I have several days off from work in a row. If you don't like a blog run on a queue system, that's on you, not me. 🔘

🔘 Event threads will take precedence over regular threads. I will space out events at my leisure. 🔘

🔘 The Sonic Franchise is my secondary interest. My main is MHA/Toshinori Yagi. 🔘

🔘 I work early morning shifts, so I'm usually asleep by a decent hour and awake before the sun's even up, most days. (EST) 🔘

🔘 My energy ain't always the best.- So please don't bug me for replies. Sometimes I forget, so if it's been over a month, you're welcome to ask me if I spaced on answering your thread (please send me the link to the most recent response you made, if you can!). 🔘

And if you made it this far, let me just say- congratulations! How you read all that and didn't keel over is beyond me.

My personal favorite Sonic games are: Sonic Unleashed, Sonic 06, Sonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood, and Sonic Riders. I also loved the Sonic X anime, though I was never particularly invested in Chris Thorndyke.

Some credits aside from those I put down for the character designs that I adopted...:

The 'caution' tape dividers that I plan to use on this blog for adult content, dark content, and triggering content were all originally made by cafekitsune (on Tumblr). They're free and public to use, but if you do use them, please do as I did and like, reblog (I threw them all into my queue, but they will reblog bit-by-bit), and credit from the original posts.

Adult Content Tape Source Dark Content Tape Source Triggering Content Tape Source

Hopefully, that's enough rambling. For now.

May your day/night be fun, and may your rest be enjoyable!

And remember- you are amazing, as you are.

[lex-n-weegie]

Elaborating more on thoughts relating to this post on a separate post so I don't take away from OP's points. There's a chance that none of this will make sense, or perhaps I'll come off as hurtful, and if either case happens please please please DM me or reply to this. Genuinely, I want to be a good person, don't be scared to approach. I'm just 18, I'm not gonna chew you out for anything

All of it is going under the cut because really, I'm just rambling and putting random thoughts together. Some swears, negativity, all that kinda junk, and I know it'll be long(also rbs are turned off because I do not want to deal with drama, college starts in a week)

I've never gotten any hate from the community for anything, I'll be upfront on that. I've only gotten 1 hateful ask in my entire time having this blog and the previous one I accidentally deleted. Irl is a slightly different story, but that isn't important to this. The worst I could even tell you specifically relating to the selfship community is not getting a lot of engagement on my posts, not getting asks when I rb ask games, and sometimes the occasional blocked out of nowhere by someone I believed I was friendly with.

I hope I've been nice in this community as well, I've been doing my best to be welcoming, open, and kind to anyone I come across. I also try my best to not complain about certain things(like lack of engagement), or even venting about irl stuff. Sure this is my blog, I can post whatever the hell I want, and to some extent I do, but I also try to have this place be one of comfort and recluse from the world. That what selfshipping was for me when I was younger, and it still kind of is, so I want others to to have that as well.

Admittedly, it's why I don't talk about real life issues often if at all. People can criticize me for that, but honestly I don't think it's fully necessary for me specifically to do so. I don't have enough followers to where me speaking about things would do much. Everyone who follows me would know about them already, and I would just be stating something that should be obvious to anyone who knows me even surface level(like killing trans/queer folk for being themselves is horrible, women should have control over their own bodies, black/poc people are equal to white people, etc etc). Genuinely, logically, I don't see any instance where I actually need to bring it up.

Also also, while yes, I'm lucky that I haven't gotten any hate, I do know people who were chased off of their own platforms because of the characters they liked, or even because they didn't know EVERYTHING about something. Their own f/o's creators or source material, an acquaintance/friend's f/os, or whatever else there is. I know of a person who was forced out with fire and pitchforks because they specifically liked a different version of a character, one where they weren't bad or anything. But because of the similar name garbage, people believed they liked an undead man who happily and openly murdered people and chased them out.

And honestly? The community has such double standards and is sometimes super online. I know I know, I'm a terminally online person too, I'm a hypocrite, but I still try to bind myself to reality and realize when some issues are, in all honesty, fucking stupid. You know how many people I've seen selfship with murderers? Not just "oh they're so misunderstood 🥺" characters either, I've seen Chucky(both human and doll), I've seen Jason, a bunch of different characters who openly enjoy murdering, who manipulate and torture, and almost none of them are openly hated or chased out with the same hatred and anger I've seen others get treated with. It's because it's not wrong. If it's not a real murderer and the person doesn't want/fantasize about doing that irl(basically bad mental issues), who cares? Genuinely, what's the issue? None, because most people don't have a problem at all with it unless it's a specific character they don't like much apparently.

As well as this, people are expected to know so much in this community. The dos and don'ts, who's right and who's wrong, what traits make a character wrong to selfship with, and the smallest mistake or unknown information can get their head on a stick. Ik a kind of big situation happen a few years back that's similar to what I'm talking about, but it's not the only thing I've citing. This has happened before, it's not a one time occurrence. Oh, you didn't know that this person you follow has an f/o who's some kind of abhorrent person? Well, to the shredder with you then. Oh, this person has an f/o who was once a bad person but has since grown and is doing good now in their source material? Well, you and the majority only know them as a villain, so go scream at them for liking such horrible things.

I'm not saying everyone is like this ofc, I'm not thinking that "oh the whole selfship community is bad I'm the only good one here. :(((" It's just that either a majority or perhaps a very loud and active part of the community are, and it sucks. The double standers suck, the demands lots have are so much, sometimes it could feel like more of a hassle than anything.

And I'll admit, I think most of it comes from the fact of what selfshipping IS. It's a form of selflove and everything, but it can go to far. "Too much of a good thing isn't a good thing for anyone." Too much confidence can make you an asshat, too much kindness can make you a doormat, too much of a specific profession or environment can make you jaded, and too much selflove can make you selfish and narcissistic. It's a safe space away from things, yes, but when you demand others do what YOU want because it'll make you more comfortable, it's just a whole mess. You need to block the tags, you need to block the people you don't like(you don't even need a good reason, blocking is free), it's up to you to curate your online experience. Like someone's art but hate a specific ship? Block the tag and keywords. This one Selfshipper annoys you and nothing else? Block them. Stop vagueposting and being so negative. You can say you're sad because you saw someone else shipping with your main, but don't name drop or be so specific that someone could figure out who.

I'll admit, the last bit comes from my own annoyances and experience. I stopped talking or joining any selfship servers because I had negative experiences. One situation specifically had someone upset that I shared an f/o with them that they were uncomfy sharing. I told them I don't talk about them often, and anytime I do I'll spoil it and have a warning. But it wasn't good enough for them apparently because they'd "click it and see/read it anyway." When they then went on to vent about it for more than a full day in the server's vent chat, it really felt like they wanted me out so they could be comfortable, all because they couldn't control themselves.

I'm sorry to be so mean, but sometimes you gotta man up. It's okay to not want to share, your f/os truly loves you, but it doesn't mean you're allowed to make demands out of others. You can ask for a tag to block, or a warning so you don't have to see, but that's all you can do.

I think that's it, sorry for all the emotion. As I kept writing I kept wanting to say more. I hope it makes some sort of sense lol