#also wow that entire interview is insane

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

I'm sorry W H A T

[peachhcs]

the draft & the night everything changed

hughes!sister x will smith au

the night samy and will finally realize they both have feelings for one another at the nhl draft in nashville.

1.7k words

for the first real fic i’m starting with the draft which basically started samy & will’s relationship! the confessions will be its own separate post & again i’m open to asks and things you guys wanna see in this au! :)

au masterlist | part 2

with all the press and interviews, samy hardly got to see will or any of the boys before the draft. she sat with her family in their hotel room as all of them got ready for the very special and exciting night. will would periodically text her updates about everything he was doing making the brunette smile each time her phone buzzed on the table.

she smiled seeing a picture will sent dressed in his suit almost ready to head out into the seats. she loved the navy and pink combination—also loving that he took her suggestions when he sent her choices a few months back. samy quickly snapped a photo back of her own dress she was wearing. it was a simple pink and black with a small opening across her midsection. she wasn't sure if it was too little for what seemed like such a classy event, but grace quickly reassured her that she looked perfect.

her entire family experienced the draft three times already, so they knew what was coming and what to expect, but samy couldn't help the butterflies in her stomach for her best friend about to get picked in the first round tonight. will was one of the best players in this draft class and even though she's hardly seen him since they got to nashville, she knew he was feeling all of the emotions.

her phone buzzed again meaning will texted her back.

will

wow you look gorgeous

his text immediately caused a blush across samy's cheeks. her head spun around making sure none of her family saw her red face before quickly sending a text back.

samy

i'll see you out there :)

the nauseating feeling in samy's stomach had been there for days. anytime she thought about will, her heart raced. she started getting excited anytime her phone buzzed hoping it was her best friend texting her back. it was..it was a weird feeling. she's never felt that way whenever will texted. at least not since the beginning of april. she didn't know what it meant nor did she really want to know because maybe deep down, she did know.

after another ten minutes, samy followed her family into the arena. there was so many people pushing past them trying to find their seats or quickly interview the draft prospects before they got seated. mrs. hughes led the way in attempt to find anyone they were sitting with. samy's stomach was doing flips with the amount of people shoving and pushing past her. she knew the draft always went crazy, but she forgot just how crazy it really was. luke's draft in the comfort of their own home two years ago was much better than the chaos inside the arena.

"samy!" someone called her name. the girl quickly spun around trying to find the source when she saw gabe's tall figure waving his hands at her. she tugged on her parents' arms and motioned towards him.

he quickly pushed his way through the crowd until he reached the family. samy was immediately brought into a hug once she was close enough.

"hey, god, this is insane." gabe laughed a little as the rest of his family came up behind him.

"i know, how are you feeling?" samy wondered and admired his fun suit.

"nervous..really nervous." the dark-haired boy admitted.

the brunette’s face softened out as she brushed down his suit jacket. “whatever happens in there is meant to happen. it's gonna be good,” samy reassured.

"have you seen will or ryan yet?" gabe changed the subject.

"i haven't seen either of them since we got here two days ago." samy said with a small frown.

"will should be coming in soon. he was a few people behind me i think." just as gabe said that, samy spotted the familiar mop of blonde hair and will's infamous navy suit scanning the crowd of people.

"i see him." samy said and gabe whipped around to find his best friend.

the girl's feet moved faster than her mind as she pushed her way through everyone to get to will. he finally spotted her and also picked up his speed to meet her in the middle.

will's hands clasped around her back, pulling her into him. the two squeezed one another tightly, taking in the moment and the feeling of finally being together after not getting to see one another yet.

"i'm so glad you're here." will muttered into her shoulder. the girl grinned, rubbing his back in a soothing manner.

the two pulled apart, missing the knowing looks from their families watching them. samy went to hug grace while will hugged gabe.

"it's good to see you again." grace laughed as she exchanged her hug with samy.

"you too, gracie.” the brunette chuckled.

"i hate to break up the reunions, but let's get our seats." mrs. smith said, always rushing people to where they needed to be like always.

everyone nodded and will found his way back to samy's side. the girl wrapped her arm around his. “how are you feeling?" she asked.

"nervous for sure." the blonde laughed. samy smiled, rubbing his arm in hopes of soothing his nerves.

everything about will looked good. his hair was styled perfectly and his suit was pressed making him look clean and classy for the night. the feeling returned in samy's stomach as she gripped his arm through the arena.

the smiths and hughes broke away from gabe's family as they took their seats on opposite ends of the stairs. whatever order mrs. smith had for everyone's seating arrangements was thrown out the window when will insisted samy sat next to him. once again, the two missed the knowing glances from family as mrs. smith gave in and let samy sit next to will.

the absent touches, the closeness, the comments—it wasn't usual to samy and will. they had always been like that, but right now samy was seeing it in a different way. will's fingers brushing across her hand left sparks in its wake. her heart raced anytime he looked at her for longer than he usually did. she just kept telling herself it was all normal. they were usually touchy and close with one another, except this time around samy couldn't get out of her head that something was different. something felt different and she didn't know if will felt it too.

the adrenaline started rising in the room as they got ready to announce the first overall pick. will's hand clasped around samy's with a firm grasp. his face was set and focused, but samy knew he had a 100 different thoughts running through his mind.

connor bedard went 1st pick overall which was pretty expected. he was a very watched player this past year and everyone knew he was probably going first.

as the second and third picks were announced, will knew he was most likely going next. it was all based on the 2nd round pick and everyone held their breaths in anticipation.

“the fourth pick overall for the san jose sharks is pleased to announce will smith." the announcer said.

everyone immediately jumped up as a smile appeared on will's lips. he quickly brought samy into his arms before hugging his parents and sisters. his mom took ahold of his suit jacket as he took it off and made his way down to the stage. gracegrabbed samy's hand, a smile on both of their faces as they watched will put on his new jersey. blue was definitely his color and samy couldn't be prouder of her best friend.

ryan and gabe weren't far after will. samy exchanged hugs with both of the boys as she watched them make their way down to the stage like her brothers did so many years ago.

everyone knew the boys had a bunch of press to do, so they wouldn't ben seeing them until after. samy tried easing her racing mind by talking more with grace and ryan's girlfriend for the time being until she couldn't take her racing thoughts anymore and needed to use the bathroom.

the girl stared at herself in the mirror trying to make sense of why she couldn't stop thinking about will and why her heart clenched every time she saw him. she didn't get it. he was her best friend. she's seen him as a brother for as long as she could remember. why was she suddenly seeing him so differently? why did he make her heart race and her palms sweaty?

samy gained the courage to go back out with everyone. she made her way through the arena when someone called her name. the girl spun around, recognizing the voice from a mile away. will was racing towards her still in his new jersey.

she threw herself into his arms as they hugged one another tightly.

"so proud of you willie." samy said into his shoulder.

"god, this feels so surreal. i don't think i've even processed it yet." will laughed a little as he pulled back some but kept his hands on her waist.

"what did i say? i knew the sharks would take you." the girl laughed as she thought about her predictions for all the boys she made months ago. will smiled, a small blush forming on his cheeks.

"thank you for being here. it..it really means a lot." will said softly. samy smiled and that time as will stared at the girl in front of him, it all fell into place.

the two felt the pull. they felt the racing hearts and the touches. will's gaze never left samy's as her heart beat a bruise into her chest seeing him look at her like that. will's heart was doing the same as samy stared back at him, uncertainty crossing into her features as they stayed like that until someone else's voice broke them apart.

"will!!" it was grace racing towards them with their families hot on her tail. samy and will quickly broke apart just as his older sister reached him and brought him into another loving hug.

samy stepped back, smiling at the sibling’s exchange all while will never took his eyes off of her.

[thelioncourts]

https://x.com/jamreiderson/status/1863413868715737454?s=46 please share your thoughts on here they are so appreciated 🫶🏻 need to hear from likeminded fans, some of this discourse is just…

I'm afraid to get too into anything right now because I feel like when I answer rashly my words reflect that rashness and my ramblings become just that: rambling. But to get something "on paper" right now I'll start by saying that I have been part of the show-fandom since the day it started, possibly even earlier if my ravings about Sam and Jacob from February and July 2022 are anything to go by. I have also been in the book-fandom for over a decade. I have been here since I was in high school and I, myself, have grown and changed drastically in that time (makes sense given I'm now far beyond my university days and am a full-fledged adult, nearing her third decade alive, wow) and in turn my thoughts on these characters and these stories have grown and changed drastically too. I have witnessed book-centered conversations, I have witnessed everyyyy show-centered conversation, and I have been in fandom spaces my whole life yet I still cannot wrap my head around the people I share fandom spaces with.

I won't ever pretend to be any kind of expert on gender and sexuality; I took some classes in college that I really enjoyed about the subjects, and I love perusing literature and academic writings on the subjects as well (more since getting into Interview if I'm being honest) but that doesn't make me an expert, I get that. I also won't ever pretend to be any kind of expert on race; again, I took some classes in college that I really enjoyed, and I also peruse literature and academic writings on race (also even more since getting into Interview, which is great regarding what it's introduced me to and also a highlight on how little education focuses on anything but white-centered writings unless taking a class in college specifically centered on writings not by white people) but I am by no means an expert. But something that is so glaringly and alarmingly apparent in this particular fandom space is that a majority of this fanbase cannot uncenter whiteness from gender and sexuality, cannot empathize or even sympathize with a black lead, and will talk over black voices in the fandom over and over and over again and will take the clapping and cheering of the loud and TikTok-brained masses as validation.

The topic of gender and sexuality in this show (and I'm talking just the show, let's leave the books as their own thing in this regard) is simultaneously really simple and also incredibly complex. There is enough material to write papers and papers on every single character and gender and sexuality, there is enough material to write papers and papers on every single relationship in this show and gender and sexuality. And so, with that in mind, I also won't pretend that one tumblr post I'm typing out on a Monday night has answers, but there's definitely more coherency here than what is available on Twitter with its limited character-count and the skill issue of its users to not read entire threads/to address only one Tweet of a twelve-part thread.

There is always a huge pushback in the fandom when any conversation of femininity, gender, societal roles, etc. regarding Louis is at the forefront. And the pushback is almost always a majority of white fans talking over a majority of black fans. Now, is that a generalized statement? Yes, of course; there are white fans on both sides of this conversation, and black fans on both sides of this conversation (and it's crazy and sad how I'm talking "sides" like this is just that, but yet it is), but the fact is that it is a majority of white fans pushing back against a majority of black fans.

This pushback happens every. single. time. conversation about Louis in these basic parameters happen. And what I've noticed a lot this time around is that insane statements like "These Louis fans only want Louis to be a trad wife" gain momentum like crazy as though that's a commonality and not like. three fanfics total, garnering more people to invalidate Louis fans who are discussing his femininity, gender, societal roles, etc. (and, again, these fans are predominantly black fans who are getting invalidated by the loudest voices in the fandom). But not even bringing those statements into the mix, it's as though people cannot remotely stomach the thought that there are a million things about Louis that are feminine, that there are a million things about Louis' gender that point in a million directions, that Louis' societal roles are complex and also so explicitly written in so many ways, that Louis likes and craves and enjoys certain parts of submission, etc. etc.

Again, I know I'm missing things. And it's gross to watch it happen over and over and over again. And no one in this fandom (and this applies on a lot of fronts, not just this particular one, but that's a whole other conversation) wants to have a conversation at all, no one wants to think. They want to quote a line out of context from the books or take a line out of context from the show (and completely misread so many lines, I'm sorry, but the reading comprehension in this fandom is atrocious) or take some statement about gender or sexuality or something out of context from a reading that actually doesn't apply to any character whatsoever. If it can't be a hit Twitter blurb, no one cares. Like, I'll be incredibly honest, there are things this fandom talks about often regarding Lestat and gender that I genuinely do not understand where they are pulling their thoughts from. I'll see people talk about something as though it's super obvious and yet I cannot remotely find where they are getting this information, read, etc. And there's a world out there where I could say that and ask to talk to someone about it and have an actual conversation so I could perhaps see where they're coming from and, even if I never agreed, maybe understand it a little bit more. But I don't think anyone can have that conversation without insults being thrown, and I'm beyond wanting to have that conversation when the same conversation about Louis is met with antiblackness and the stereotypes about black men that further showcase how a majority of the white people in this fandom cannot uncenter their whiteness. And I'm still not sure if any of this makes sense. And I'm sure I'll have to turn anon off or something because I can already see and anticipate people sending gross things under the anonymous gift of Tumblr. But yeah. I don't want to have these conversations anymore, I've been having them for three years now, I can't help that new fans are joining and reinvigorating old discourse, but then the discourse, as discourse in this fandom so often does, becomes disgustingly antiblack and it's like -- it's just this cycle of awfulness and it makes things not enjoyable and it makes me angry and sad and it adds to my continued loss of hope that literacy skills will ever improve, etc. etc. etc.

[starofhisheart]

Sooooo episode 5, huh........

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE SEASON 2 EPISODE 5 under the cut

Wow. What breathtaking acting from Assad, Jacob, Eric & Luke. Assad in particular had me captivated. The uncomfortable but graceful otherworldliness he exuded was incredible to watch. I asked for psychosexual torture for devil's minion and that's exactly what I got. Armand, angry but sexy, torturing and controlling Daniel for DAYS. Being so kind to his victim he becomes like a god in Daniel's eyes. The "teach me to be fascinating like you"!! The dropping to the knees part!!! Daniel talking back and resisting Armand's compulsion. God, such good food.

But what I didnt expect was being moved by Louis and Daniel's friendship. How Louis' words stayed with him throughout his entire life, pulling him back from the edge over and over again. Their flirty, casual comraderie in 73' and their burgeoning alliance in the present. They're the friendship i didnt know i needef but im so glad i have.

So.e moments that made me insane in bullet point form cause im lazy:

Armand mind linking to Lestat but not relaying his desperate "i love you's" to Louis

Daniel casually offering sex to Louis and present Daniel like "Did we...?" asdfghkl

Louis shit talking Lestat in the interview and Daniel hyping him up like they're drunk girls in the pub bathroom vs finding out he was doing that so Lestat would read the book and come find him (he doesnt know he's still trapped by Armand probably 😭😭)

The line Louis said at the beginning of the episode being said by Armand at the end, cementing how much Armand has played with Louis' mind

Armand revealing a piece of his past to young Daniel and then seeing him visually switching back to the kind killer (Assad when i find you!!!!)

Confirmed bisexual Daniel

Armand basically telling Daniel exactly what his life will be like and it being accurate 😭

Louis thinking he hears Claudia and immediately running into the sunlight

Thoughts:

So here's how the Alice theory could still work asdfhhkl lol no but seriously I think Armand, like in the books, stalks Daniel throughout his life and perhaps even interacts with him at different points. A cat and mouse chase, per say. This theory of mine is flimsy cause if this were true old Daniel would have had flashbacks & Armand could have just looked into Daniel's past with his powers. But what gives me hope about this theory is that interaction in a previous episode when Louis is cajoling Daniel & Armand tries to softwn the blows with "she wanted to say yes...but you hadn't given her a reason to" and also this:

I very much hope these devils minion seeds they've planted bear fruits, maybe not in this season but in the coming seasons. Surely there's more to their story...

But anyway, the show continues to blow me away each week and I am so sad we are nearing the season finale. I want a million seasons of this. Every Vampire Chronicles book adapted. Truly outstanding performances, writing, direction-everything!

[apoptoses]

i gotta know, what order do you rank the VCs

oh man I cannot number order them, to do that would be like picking a favorite cat and they change depending on my mood so like I gotta go with the tier system.

ALSO I never promised anyone here that I had taste, these are my own personal feelings etc etc Mostly I have ranked them based on how much I skim when (or if) I re-read lol

The Vampire Armand- Anne put her whole entire vampirussy into this one like this is the book that has everything!!! There's angst, there's smut, there's cults and kidnapping, there's the beauty and high drama of the Venetian renaissance, what more could you want!! And honestly I think her Armand voice is one of her strongest, right up there with Lestat. You could take an Armand quote out of context and know he's the one speaking. Even my least favorite parts of TVA are still more enjoyable than the best parts of the VC books I don't love.

The Devil's Minion Chapter of QotD specifically - absolute insanity, just banger after banger, not a single word wasted. I could have read an entire novel of this, and again, a unique voice and style! I think this part of the book slaps so hard because it's the first truly modern part of the VC, told from a modern perspective and like. It's so good because every VC reader has probably thought 'wow how exciting would it be to be a vampire's companion/lover' and then Anne actually went and wrote what that would be like. Incredible!

The Vampire Lestat - Getting the back story of the characters introduced in interview is incredible and I feel like Anne finally cut loose and let herself start to be a weirdo with all the world building and entangled relationships. Also just worth the re-read for Armand drop kicking Lestat out of Notre Dame and Marius's insane house of taxidermy and baboons.

Interview with the Vampire- a classic, no other details needed.

Tale of the Body Thief- a polarizing choice I know, but it's such a wild diversion from the typical VC books. Lestat described himself as the James Bond of Vampires and this is the one book that's truly like a tightly written action movie. And Lestat is just so monstrous in it, and in a really complex way- like he's partly reacting to the trauma he went through with Akasha, he's at a low point with self esteem, but then also some of this behavior begs the question of whether being a vampire made him the way he is or whether it's just inherent in him. An underrated VC book tbh.

Blood and Gold- I just love that Anne took on the challenge of writing the life story of a vampire that is thousands of years old. Reading it gives me the same feeling of growing up and realizing that the people you considered 'adults' are just as lost and mentally immature and messed up as you, and never really had any idea what they were doing when child-you thought they had it all together. Also I just love anything that gives me more of the events of Armand's life from another pov.

Queen of the Damned- a great story but I get bogged down by the number of characters and plot lines introduced every time I re-read it, and I end up skimming some of the POVs (or skipping them entirely like baby jenks) I know Anne finally put her foot down and told her editors to fuck off with this one but I wish she'd listened to them just a tiiiiny bit and cut some stuff/expanded other more interesting stuff.

Pandora - Such tight writing!! I wish Pandora hadn't been sidelined in the other books because Anne built such a strong character with her, she deserved better tbh!!

Prince Lestat - it's okay, I just like the sections with my favorite characters and seeing some secondary characters return like Bianca and Allessandra and Antoine. Getting some resolution on what happened with them and where they are closer to the modern day was nice. Also the stuff with Fareed giving Lestat hormones so he could fuck and then get Maury Povich'd eighteen years later was hilarious nonsense, 10/10 Anne insanity. This book just feels like fun trashy vampire stuff (affectionate) in the same way watching True Blood feels like fun trashy vampire stuff, so even if it's not Anne's best work it's still alright imo.

Memnoch the Devil - I simply do not care about God or the Devil or Dora or Rembrandt enough to care about this book, and it only gets ranked below Prince Lestat because I think it drags where PL has a faster pace that allows my brain to skim over the least tasty parts. Really it only makes it to D because of Armand in his dusty jean jacket and Lestat using Dora's uterus as his personal capri sun. Overall though just a slog to get through.

Blood Communion - I just personally do not care for the whole vampire court concept and wish Anne had dropped it after the replimoids. Like I tolerate it in Prince Lestat but ending the series on 'united vampire community' feels off to me when the whole concept of vampires is that they're outsiders struggling with immortality. Also, another kidnapping plot? Anne pls you're better than this.

Merrick - I have erased everything but the Louis bits of this book from my mind. We simply did not need Claudia's vengeful spirit or Louis getting force upgraded and the humanity of him erased by Lestat's ultra-powerful blood but we got it anyways I guess. Very atmospheric though, I do like the return to New Orleans as a setting.

Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantis - Cruel of Anne to put Atlantis in the title and give us aliens instead of mermaids. The most cracked out VC book in existence, would only re-read if paid to. I have no words for how much I do not care for this book, especially after reading Anne's notes at Tulane and knowing what could have existed instead.

The Vampire Vittorio - such a flop of a vampire he never even gets mentioned in the other VC books. I do not know this man. This book does not exist to me.

[expatesque]

Monthly Recap - Dec

Slightly delayed, under the cut

Read

The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula K. Le Guin - So so good, strongly recommend.

Tokyo Express, Seicho Matsumoto - A very good murder mystery, intricately plotted and intensely twisty. A nice, quick read

Watched

Deep Christmas here, so watched like, so many Christmas movies. Highlights were: A Biltmore Christmas (Hallmark movie that was way better than it had any right to be), Our Little Secret (Lindsay's best Christmas movie yet), the Chad Michael Murray stripper one (obviously), and Holiday (a Cary Grant / Katherine Hepburn film that, while not really about Christmas, takes place entirely over the holiday period).

The whole of A Gentleman in Moscow on the planes to and from Chicago. This was good, but the book was better and I think they could have done a better job. They leaned into the darkness in the book whereas I think learning into the more Wes Anderson elements would have been better.

Shrinking - Only a few episodes into this but really liking it.

Star Trek 2009 - First time watching this in years and it's still so good. Has kicked off a bit more of a Star Trek binge, can't wait for the new season of Strange New Worlds.

Did

Attended: Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit at the Hammersmith Apollo (he's so great, but wow never seen a quieter more sedate crowd in my life) and Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Commet of 1812 (soooo good, it's turned into a full blow obsession and has got me reading War and Peace.

Had my birthday party! Was so nervous about this but actually it was amazing, so much fun.

Learned about: skin care. As I approached 30 a line appeared on my forehead that no amount of moisturizer would help, and I promptly freaked out. The result of my deep dive: I had my cousin prescribe me some tretinoin when I was in the States and I'm now using that (starting off very slowly using the moisturizer sandwich method, don't worry).

Hosted Christmas Eve dinner which went okay, timing was off but food was good and desert in particular was really good.

Last Month’s Goals

☑️Use all class pass classes: Knew I wasn't going to use them all this month, only did two classes, both in Chicago - Ritual Hot Yoga (the best, bougiest experience) and then a HIIT class around the corner from my parents' place (nice, but not great).

☑️Read a book: see Read section above.

☑️New Recipes x2: (1) British style roast potatoes (yum, but take way longer than I was expecting) (2) Chocolate mousse (this recipe, very easy and nice) with a raspberry/blackberry sauce.

☑️Go to a new museum: The Driehaus Museum in Chicago, a completely crazy Gilded Age mansion. Truly insane interiors, too much in many places but lots of gorgeous moments.

❌Go to an Exhibition: Fail on this, but I'm giving myself a pass because I was only in the UK for brief period.

☑️Go to a show: check, see above.

❌Crochet: Was really crap this month, gotta get back to it!

❌Write More: Knew this wasn't going to happen this month, and lo.

❌Lay morning foundation: Yeah this was never going to happen over the holidays. For Jan!

☑️Budget: Barely, so ready to be employed again.

❌Memorize a poem: RIP, no.

🟧Russian flashcards: I took like half month off 😂

❌Screen time: Worse than last month, traveling and being home did me in. Gotta get back to good habits!

❌Job prep: This is priority #1 for Jan.

☑️ Quality Time: check! Did well, saw everyone I should have and spent good time with them all.

Next Month’s

Carrying Over

Use all class pass passes

Four new recipes

Read a book (actually I'm reading War and Peace at the moment so unlikely to finish that, but will be happy with good progress)

Visit a new musuem

Go to an exhibition

Go to a show (have The Importance of Being Earnest scheduled and will likely also see Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake)

Crochet

Interview Prep

Write more

Morning foundation

Budget

Memorize a poem

Russian flashcards

Screentime

New

Read World of Inferiors (really behind on these!)

[awesomehoggirl]

Hi I been thinking about art n how I reeeaaally wanna learn more about it, n how much I love it, but idrk where to start… any tips n tricks?

HI!!! im assuming ur talking abt art history not the practice of like. making art cause thats what ive been talking abt on here recently LAWL but send another if i misunderstood and this was more about making art :3 so the most important thing abt art is that it is literally all about communication and asking questions. when you look at a piece of visual art (at an exhibition maybe, or just online) you should be taking note of the very first things that spring to mind when you look at it and then questioning them. wow, those shadows are done in a really unusual shade of blue. why? this artstyle is experimental and unfamiliar to me. how so? what is it saying and what is it attempting? i like this. why do i like it? so thats kinda like the visual component to appreciating art, but the contextual historical component is equally as important and fun. reading books and articles or watching documentaries and interviews surrounding art and artists you like can be a really fun way to follow up on everything youve taken from a work. i love to use the internet to indulge my interest in art history, bc if you like what an artist is doing in two seconds you can go down a wikipedia rabbit-hole and find their entire body of works, you can map their evolution and all the historical nuances that affected their work as well as the contemporary timeline of art, and you can open up a whole new array of questions because when you look back at the work you will always always always see it in a brand new light. and!!! you can use tumblr or pinterest and curate museum collections of your favourite art, in the same way you would make a playlist or lookbook. you can start anywhere you want and follow insane trails of influences and end up in a completely different era. everything links in art history and thats the best part! i dont know if i can properly capture all the angles you can approach art from in this post just like God looking at art is so fun and also very accessible and easy to do and everyone should do it. pick up literally any thread you like (a popular artist, or movement, or decade) and you will always find something incredible and unexpected along the line 👍

[gurorori]

The Seed and Queendom were so powerful whwhwbwhsjjdd i'm🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i love. Cure for me was also verrry fun i love her choreographies, she's such a skilled and fluid dancer !!!

And exist for life is so🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭 beautifulllll i'm wjqbwnnsns <333 in love. I love. A lot . Mwah thank you for all your recommendations it is. 3:15am and i have to call it a day but !!!!!! Wah

da seed always gimme chills cuz i love da message & its nawt jus a figure of speech either, aurora fun fact is dat shes grown up in very close proximity 2 nature n clearly has so so much love n respect 4 it an i think it show wonderfully nawt only thru her music but thru her entire energy. she bcome one with it!! there a reason every1 calls her a forest nymph / elf n so much more in da comments aha

tho i think 2 call her anythin but human is a bit unfair, i think shes very human in da most beautiful of ways. unironically

queendom is suhc an anthemmmm... n it warms my heart when i see live performances of it cuz it really feel like one big hug with every1 given da lyrics n jus da vibes it creates. luv it so much, n i love da music video n_n women....

cure 4 me is very special 2 me even tho it a bit sillier soundin than most of her songs (along w the chorus blowin up on tt) readin more ab it from aurora herself tho, it turn out da inspiration came from sumthin dats a very loaded topic & after dat i cudn look at it da same & grew even closer 2.. THE SONG? idk why im talkin ab it lik a human but. word from miss aurora:

"Like always, I got inspired by a really huge, dark and horrible thing that happens in the world. The first seed of inspiration came from thinking about the countries where it’s still legal to do conversion therapy for gay people and lesbians. I just thought that’s so pointless. The first idea was me saying, ‘I don’t need a cure for me – just let me live, man!’”

“Why is it so difficult for people to just let others be themselves? Then I thought that it could mean many other things. People tend to believe quite quickly that something is wrong with them if they’re not like the people they see in front of them. It’s so sad that it doesn’t take much for us to really doubt ourselves.”

^ lil context 4 dat is, aurora is definitely queer as shes talkd ab her attraction 2 ppl in da past & shes had a girlfriend be4 too. i think she mentions dat she feels different romantically in regards 2 men n women. but also she doesn label herself really, but i think this gives more insight into this song. as well as ive noticed ppl talkin ab her includin some of her own more 'weird' mannerisms n well. the dance is weird n silly too (/affectionate!!! its gettin added 2 sky soon like i talkd abt in dms, n im boutta spam it everywhere) n i think it an incredible move too.

i think cure 4 me can also b related back 2 auroras neurodivergence, which she has talkd ab before. she mentioned bein made fun of @ school 4 bein autistic (altho i don think she was ever diagnosed w it) n also bein put on adhd medication in da past - pretty sure dats her official diagnosis. but yeah. honesly, jus from watchin the way she carries herself n moves n talks in interviews & lives, she was always so clearly different & felt closer than other artists 2 me. like nawt in a 'wow shes so weird' way like sum ppl say. idk theres an inherent sense of belongin w dat person cuz shes so much like us too. man i started cryin but anyway i luv her lots she really mean lots 2 me.

exist 4 love is very beautiful too.. i luv da reference 2 the birth of venus, i love da influence of 1920/30s music too like many mentioned.. it make me melt into a puddle sumtime. we rly do exist 4 it huh.!!!!

but yah n_n thank 4 goin on this aurora journey wit me!!! am glad it was fun & am glad 2 infect ya so @/meowyoi, ya n i can all grow a bit more insane togethr <3

[radikylie]

Journal entry 5 million years later

Wow. It’s been well over a year and a half since I posted anything super personal and probably close to two years since being active on here. It has been a rollercoaster. In November 2021, I accepted a job at a university in the state where my love lived. After my graduate assistantship ended in 2020, it took me a year and a half to find a full-time job because of Covid. I applied to nearly 100 jobs and only heard back from maybe 10% of those jobs. And then I had exactly 3 and a half weeks to move my entire life across the country and move into an apartment with my then long-distance girlfriend when I was offered a job at a mid-size university.

Sometimes my life still doesn’t feel real. I’ve been so happy to be with my Emily and our quirky little sweet cat, but navigating life as an adult in this clown world has been extremely hard. I still can’t believe I live in fucking North Dakota. Our first two winters here have been the most brutal I have ever experienced. Boy, I thought I had SAD when I lived on the east coast but it sure is worse here. We hate living in a red state, but at least we live in the biggest city that is the most progressive.

My job as an admission counselor has been rewarding, difficult, draining, fun, and now mixed with frustration and disappointment. Our education system is a complete dumpster fire. Our incoming students and current students are having mental health crises every fucking day. It tears me apart sometimes to think that I am promising students a future I can’t guarantee with how the world is right now and where it’s going. In a week of traveling, I can drive over a thousand miles and spend over 30 hours in a car. There are high expectations and pressure to bring in first-year students because they are the true cash cows and there’s been a national decrease in enrollment across all institutions. The people I work with have been genuinely great people and are the best parts of the job sometimes. But the pay is absolute shit, and that coupled with rising greedflation and my outrageous private student loan debt feels like it’s crushing me. I don’t know how much longer I can take.

I recently applied for another job within my office that pays 10k more, and I know deserve something insanely better, but it would have been a good transition point and actually allow me to save money to move, and to get an EdTech job that is remote. I was denied this new job, the other candidate had “years of direct marketing experience” where I didn’t, but I had almost 2 years of experience in my office. I’ve shown them consistently that I have strong project management skills and organization for handling all of the texting/calling campaigns we do for students which was another part of this new job. It was handling all of the communications for print/emails (project management) and the job description didn’t even place a strong emphasis on design or marketing. But that’s what they went for in the other candidate. A white man. He wore a fucking flannel to the interview. If he didn’t have an awesome portfolio to present and he doesn’t bring the “wow” factor to this job, I’m going to be even more pissed.

And you know what also makes me mad. Last year around this time, we were actively hiring for another admission counselor position, and I was on that search committee. We were down to two choices, someone with 14 years of experience, and another person who interviewed so strongly but only had previous tour guide experience in terms of higher ed experience. We asked our supervisor if we could choose the person with less experience and she said that she would support that. We offered the position to the person with less experience but they eventually declined because the salary was so low (which we did advertise the salary??). So for this position I wanted, why would they not elevate another person in their office who has worked so fucking hard and has gone above and beyond for this position, and knows this office and best practices. So why does years of direct of experience matter now?

I cried for like the whole day. People in my office were rooting for me to have this job. The woman who previously had this job, she came from my position before that and didn’t even have a master’s. I cried because I felt trapped in this job, mainly due to capitalism. I cried because I felt so betrayed and underestimated. My direct supervisor was the chair for the search committee, and I know she doesn’t want to lose me as a counselor. Our director told me that my supervisor “adores” me, and that I consistently come up in their conversations about how I do great work and I get shit done. My director said she was excited that I applied and hoped they chose me, so I went into my final interview feeling very confident because she had already met the other two candidates before me.

When my supervisor called me to tell me the news (she was a at a conference), she started out saying that she appreciated me so much and that the other candidate would let them go in another direction that they didn’t even know they could go. I couldn’t speak. My voice cracked and I said thank you for letting me know and we ended the conversation. She followed up with a message on Microsoft Teams saying she appreciated me again and would like to help me build my skills to get me a job in EdTech, which is what I ultimately want. And I wonder if this response is because I low-key indicated to my director (because she flat out asked me) if I would leave if I didn’t get this job and I said yes. I don’t think my supervisor realizes how immediate I want (more like need) to leave.

I went home early crying after spending the entire week, waiting for the call, with extreme brain pain (psychophysiological disorder) symptoms and upset stomach to where I couldn’t eat because I was so stressed. Essentially, my nervous system thinks I’m in “danger” when thinking about travel season so it sends me unpleasant physical symptoms, like nerve pain in my face and muscle aches and nausea to where it gets debilitating at times. And travel season is both Fall and Spring. This past spring, I had to drive on icy back roads to rural parts of ND where my phone service does not work at times and once my tire starting leaking because it had a screw in it. I had a lowkey panic attack because I didn’t know what to do and needed to go to small town (population of 207) to get it patched. I was raped on a back road in a car with a man I thought I could trust when I was 20 so being out in the middle of nowhere gives me so much fucking anxiety. I’m stressed at the thought of college fairs starting in less than 2 months.

Stressed because I can’t do this fucking job anymore. The thought of being in this job for another travel season, like 6 weeks or more on and off of traveling start mid-September through November. And what’s worse is that we get “reimbursed” for our meals that we are out on the road but because North Dakota is North Dakota, I only get reimbursed up to $35 dollars a day meanwhile my coworkers traveling within MN can get up to $70 per day. So, when I travel, I have to be as frugal as possible and still lose money because I only get $6.50 for breakfast (unless I’m at a hotel and they have breakfast), 10.50 for lunch, and 17.50 for dinner. It was fine when I first started out but because of greedflation, it’s so much harder.

My student loan payments are like $700 dollars a month, and even though I have three fucking degrees, I’m stuck at an entry level pay despite having an MS degree. The pay across campus is abysmal. The pay for people with advance degrees is absolute shit. They advertised a mental health counselor position here which required a master’s or above and a license in counseling or social work for 43k. Like WHAT. That is what was offered to me when I started. I can’t save money long-term to get out of this fucking state, and we can’t even pay to go on a mini-vacation for a weekend trip. I had to tell my best friend from high school that I couldn’t go to her very fancy wedding on Cape Cod because there’s no way I can even save for myself. And I don’t think she will ever understand what its like to financially struggle and it feels like she lowkey resents me for it, and it makes me feel alone knowing she could never understand since both her and her husband come from a family with money. I worry she thinks I am just dumb as hell and not responsible with money but I can’t save for fucking anything. 

And my god, it could be so much worse. I know this, and am grateful for what we do have but it feels like we have very little to look forward to, and we pretty much can only spend what we need and not for things we want long-term. My family was exactly middle-class and moved into upper-middle class by the time I was in late high school, so it’s brought me more perspective. We are what they call “new poor” - we are one unexpected medical bill/car repair bill away from financial insecurity. I never had to worry about things like this before, I grew up blessed, and I know this. I try to give what I can when I can to my community and family and friends in need.

I tried to pick up a second job at really, really cool brewery but the shifts are so long (6-8 hours) and I sprained my knee on the job which led to my entire back seizing up two days before my birthday a few months ago. The worst birthday I’ve ever experienced. When my back spasmed, I couldn’t walk for three days. I cried the entire time almost. The first day it happened I screamed in pain with every little movement, like so much so Emily worried the cops would be called. Emily had to do everything for me – help me shower, eat, go the bathroom and she cared for me so well. I am so blessed and lucky to have her. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. I had to go back to physical therapy and that was expensive also because health insurance is a fucking scam. It took me about a month to get to 60% okay.

I couldn’t work at the brewery for months and the money from there was so good because it’s an insanely huge operation so now I’m back in the same position now, and don’t know if I can physically keep up with the work. They work their employees so hard, not in a bad way necessarily, it’s just the nature of it because it’s in the top 10 breweries on untapped or whatever. I don’t think I can physically handle more than one or two shifts a month, but I’m afraid to work a whole shift again.

My health is not great. My desk job already has me gaining weight paired with PCOS that feels like it’s out of control, and my body hurts from sitting all day. My face is constantly breaking out from hormonal acne, I’m sure it’s been from all the stress I’ve been under too, but also because everything in this fucking world is harmful to us in one way or another. I’m not at the highest weight I’ve ever been but close to 20 pounds extra since I moved here. Its just so hard to find time and energy to workout because I have so little of both. Especially when I’m traveling, and it’s harder because the cheapest food when I’m out on the road is fast food so there’s not a lot of options to be healthy, especially in fucking ND. I think the only healthy/salad bowl kind of place is in the city we are in and the capital of ND and that’s it lol and its also more expensive. Driving for hours and hours is so exhausting. So. my mental health and self-image have been suffering from all of that too.  

But it feels like we are stuck in this city that is filled with terrible drivers and roads, and these brutal winters. The winters wouldn’t be so bad if the city actually maintained the roads better but every other week it feels like we are risking our lives to go to fucking work. I’ve had to drive through blizzards when I’ve never had any winter driving experience before. I’ve had an entire panic attack/mental breakdown on the interstate here that was completely iced over for 75 miles and I needed to get to the other side of the state for a fucking career fair for work. There were cars in ditches, and another fucking blizzard on the way after receiving well over a foot of snow in some parts of ND. If we weren’t visiting Em’s parents in the same town, and if she didn’t take over and drive on the icy parts for me, we would have never made it. I would have been paralyzed in fear at a truck stop without her, and she really showed up for me that day.

Spring and Fall both lasted maybe 3 weeks before it was either hot or cold season which seems to be all that ND has. Spring used to be my favorite season, but here the flowers don’t bloom until late May and its just mud and rain. Its depressing as hell. At least the summers have been mild in comparison to the disgustingly humid summers MD/VA have. When we do get a few really humid/hot days everyone complains so much and its funny to me because that’s basically any day in the summer on the east coast. It wouldn’t be so bad if our apartment ac unit actually fucking cooled our apartment below 72 degrees on a consistent basis. When its extremely hot and humid here, our apartment has gone up to 79 degrees if we do any sort of cooking or baking. It takes days to cool down, even with extra fans.

The city we live in does have a cool community and lots awesome local businesses. That’s been a saving grace. They do a lot of farmer’s markets, vintage markets, community/mutual aid events. If the world ever completely collapsed (which I feel is inevitable), I would feel pretty safe here and secure knowing the community is full of genuine and resourceful people. It’s a very safe and cheap city to live in because nobody wants to live in these winters. But we have no real friends here. We have our work friends who are just that, and it’s incredibly disappointing. We are both introverts but crave deeper connections with others, even if its only a few. One of the hardest lessons I have ever had to learn, and still learning, are that friends are like the seasons – they come and go.

I miss my family. I miss those summer days where I would wake up late, and my brother’s family would come over to swim. The dogs would be playing, and my niece and nephew being silly. My dad would grill and my mom would make a bunch of sides and we’d eat outside on the deck together. No plans except to go play a silly little video game by myself or with some people later that night after going for a walk or a run in my neighborhood in the woods. I miss sitting out in my driveway under the stars and trees with a good playlist, smoking a bowl, and reading about aliens. I miss my niece and nephew coming over every Tuesday and the house being so crazy with them but never a dull moment. I didn’t think I would miss that so much. My brothers can be assholes (my older brother more so), but it was nice when we were all getting along.

My relationship with my parents has gotten better as I’ve gotten older but they still can’t give me the emotional support that I need. Emily’s mom has been more emotionally supportive. My parents never ask me how I’m doing, just what I’m doing. I wish they would come visit me but I don’t think they ever will. They wouldn’t even fly me or Emily out for Christmas even though they have more than enough money to do so. They’ve been going on 10-day vacations in Jamaica at fucking Sandals, and doing weekend trips all over the east coast. But seeing me is not enough of a reason to fly here. 

They keep telling me how much they miss me and want me to move back but then don’t do anything to help me do that. They said they would help us move if I got a job on the east coast but don’t care that I’m drowning in student debt.  They disappoint me still and it feels like I have to grieve my relationship with them of what I need versus what they give me. It’s been that way my entire life. I know that they will never apologize for the things that they did while growing up. It’s a sad thing to come to terms with.

Another thing I have had to come to terms with is my purpose in this world, I guess. When I was 18, I didn’t know what I wanted to do, but I knew I wanted to help people in some capacity. When I was 21, I had this grandiose idea and plans for how I could do that and save the world. When I was 24, I wanted to be a recreational therapist and create a holistic community center. When I was 25, I had started a master’s degree in Higher Education because I wanted to be a graduate assistant to a unique women’s college program within my university, which I worked hard to desperately create a safe space for young women, but the university didn’t give an actual shit about it. I didn’t think I would end up in higher education but here I am.

This is not where I expected myself to be at all, but I really did enjoy working with my students. So, I stayed in it. I finished my degree. And now I feel “stuck” in an education system that is very much a fucking dumpster fire. I’m feeling burnt out, I guess. It’s wrecking my mental and physical health. My nervous system is on high alert all the time, I think. I feel like I can never get enough time to actually rest and recover.

I’ve also had to re-evaluate my “purpose”. I’m an extremely spiritual person and have very much moved away from New Age completely but very interested in paganism or Mother Earth spirituality. I used to think that I had to have this grandiose purpose to change the world, but I recognize that the most important change comes from the self and extending that out to your community. Small acts of kindness can go a long way and encourage others to do the same, creating a chain reaction. But where exactly does that leave me?

Part of me wants to go to another university because of the “prestige” around it, but every institution has its own problems and is still within America’s education system that is a fucking shit show. I’m so concerned about how others see me sometimes, especially in professional sense. I felt like I was a late bloomer in all things because it took me 6 years to get my bachelor’s, but I also had a complete thyroidectomy after struggling with severe symptoms from it, and then being raped 3 months after the surgery. I was academically suspended for a year after my surgery and SA because my GPA was so low. There are so many people from that period of time who wrote me off as a dumb stoner and had no idea I was abusing weed because of trauma. Even my ex-girlfriend and her friends just thought I was a dumb stoner.

So, I guess I feel the need to “prove” that I am more than what they assumed me to be. I thought that I needed to be so career-driven to change the world and I am starting to understand that having that mindset is not a healthy way to live and will lead to self-destruction and burnout. I never thought I would hate my current job as much as I do. And I’m realizing that I don’t necessarily hate the work, but rather the expectations and circumstances surrounding it. I could stick out this job longer if I was paid more but it feels like I am running out of time to find something different before travel season starts again.

I’ve essentially quiet quit at this point. I feel like I have to detach myself from everyone because it hurts that I’m going to have to leave some of the people in my office, and I would go to bat for them at any time. I’ll be doing just above the bare minimum, and will not be volunteering as often to do extra things any more. A coworker of mine just got placed into her dream job and I’m so excited for her, but her leaving also gives us more work to cover. Another reason why I need to leave. And if I can leave before travel season, I feel a little guilty leaving during an important peak time, but they put me in this position. 

I can’t do it. I won’t if I don’t have to. And if September comes, and I am still searching for a job, I will do the college fairs with the goal of leaving before October. They could have given me the other position and I would have grown into it, and worked extremely hard to exceed their expectations and they could have arranged to have a new admission counselor in my position by the time college fair season started. But they made their choice. I need to make mine now.

But now I feel like I have to redefine what work means to me. Fuck the system. I can make my own path. I can change the world without a grandiose career. Its okay to just show up to work and then live your life. And so, I hope that my next job is in EdTech (and remote) that can give me financial freedom and security because that’s what it really all comes down to. I want a “lazy girl” job. A job that I feel good about and is not as emotionally/physically demanding so that I have the money to help others and do what I want. I just want to live a comfortable life, and one where I am not always worrying about money.

So, in order to get that, I think I need to release all of this. It’s been holding me back. I deserve a job that pays me well, and lets me live the life I want. A job that lets me help my friends and families, and give back to my community. I don’t have to bear the burden of being in a career that is glorified for how much you give and destroy yourself for it. I can’t imagine what k-12 teachers feel every day.

I think the next piece is letting go. Doing a trust fall for Mother Goddess to catch me and deliver me to my next opportunity. Trusting that the perfect job is on its way to me, and I won’t miss out on something that is for me. I deserve a job that gives me a better work-life balance. That I don’t feel like I am killing myself to survive. I have the money to live how I want, and all of the time and energy I have for other things is abundant.

I get so caught up worrying about making the right or wrong choice, or missing out on a job posting. I get caught up thinking that I’m not quite enough – I don’t have quite enough experience or direct experience or the right degrees. I get caught up with thinking about the cost of living in other states and what I can’t do or where we can’t move to. What if I’m meant to focus on the good, and all of the possibilities and different lives of Kylie. The possible exciting adventures in store for me.

Its reminiscent to how I felt when I couldn’t find a job after my graduate assistantship. I was stressing over every little thing. And then I finally just surrendered. That’s what it felt like after my huge disappointment with Bryn Mawr College and they decided not to hire me but not long after that I was offered my current job. And how I felt after running into my ex at a grocery store and having a panic attack and obsessing over how I’m going to meet my love and what I do or don’t do that could lead me to missing that connection. I eventually had to acknowledge and say that I surrender to the wonderful mystery that is the Universe. About two weeks of recognizing my need to let go of control, I met my Emily.

The catalyst this time is not getting this position within my office. It was a devastating disappointment. I’m still trying to reconcile that. But it has also opened me up to the fact that I do deserve something insanely better - better pay, better benefits, better work-life balance. I know my worth. And while I feel betrayed that I wasn’t picked for this position, I don’t need to punish myself or the people in my office for it. I do still feel a hint of resentment towards my supervisor, but she’ll understand the choice she made when I get offered my next job.

At first, I wanted to sulk. I wanted to quiet quit as loudly as possible. But now I see that I need to cherish my time with everyone. I want them to miss having me. I want to leave the office on good terms. But I want people to know that they lost my loyalty as well. I want people to think that they wish I was still there because of all the light and humor I brought. So. I will not be jumping at every opportunity to volunteer extra time and energy towards things. I will not be half-assing this job completely, but I will not be going above and beyond as often anymore either.

I am still incredibly sad and frustrated at this disappointment, but I see it was necessary and its time for me to move on, as scary as it seems. I will miss these people so much. So now I need to let go. Trust fall. Mother Goddess, A-team, I trust that the perfect job will find its way to me and will bring about the most exciting and best chapters of my life. Thank you for this.

[stylezxsilvermoon]

star's summer watches review list (ft...hot ass actors)

hey everyone i've been watching a hella lot of movies with hot men in it (hence the pictures) and i wanted to do a review or wrap up list, because this summer i've watched an unbelievable amount of movies and shows this summer (like may to august) so yeah why not make a list! and maybe rate some of them!

(not in chronological order at all)

hayden christensen

factory girl

shatterd glass

life as a house

virgin territory

little italy

vanishing on 7th street

awake

takers

higher ground (show)

american heist

little italy

hayden christensen faves:

i might be a bit bias (i am) (denial) but i really did semi-like everything hayden was in, although some of it was a bit weird. but my faves that you should SO WATCH is life as a house (2001) i just rewatched it for the 4th time and its just such a classic coming-of-age 2000's movie about this edgy teen that has separated parents and his dad takes him for the summer, and its just a whole thing you have to watch it.

also not to mention higher ground (show) its about these teens that are troubled and end up at a summer camp for abuse survivors and druggies and it just goes so in depth about serious topics and i just love it so much, there's a tiny bit of drama but it's not so over the top its unbelievable, and its realistic too.

tom sturridge:

the boat that rocked/ pirate radio (uk version vs us version lol)

on the road

like minds/ murderous intent

sweetbitter (show)

3 way junction

waiting for forever

effie gray

tom sturridge faves:

literally just the boat that rocked/pirate radio (2009), its so good, its about these middle aged men who start an illegal radio channel on a boat, and the godson of one of them is tom sturridge's character and it takes off from there, also set in the 60s...and made in 2009...so ehem...ya know...

but still really good! fun fact this was the first tom sturridge movie i watched and it's still my fave! also another fun fact you can literally find all of waiting for forever full movie on youtube uploaded by some random person here (not a rick roll, literally the full movie no joke)

mike faist:

(not that many since i just got into him but he still makes the list lol)

panic (show)

west side story

challengers

the atlantic city story

i can i will i did

mike faist faves:

ok so we probably all know challengers is gonna sweep right..right? yeah but actually WRONG it was panic (2021) but challengers (2024) is a close 2nd for me, the reason being i did not get it at all first watch, but i watched some movie reviews on it and watched the interviews with the cast and i actually was like wow this is deeper than i thought (mainly bc i just hated tashi the whole movie) lol blame my probably ocd high morality and anxiety that was PROBABLY flaring while watching it but its just! a character! so we can look at it from a regular standpoint

but yeah, panic just had me on the edge of my seat the ENTIRE time and it was such a good show, im sad it got cancelled but what I saw of it was SOSOSO good I'm clawing at the walls of my enclosure

and yeah to wrap this post up I just wanna say all 3 of these men are insanely talented and I'm looking forward to watching all of their movies and shows...and out of all of them in total I'd say my favorite one is probably life as a house (2001) and it just captured those summer vibes for me and it was one of the (1st? I think) movies I watched of hayden's that started this ENTIRE thing, this monstrosity of me foaming at the mouth for these fine ass men and posting about it several times lmfao

and btw moots! And ppl who I don't follow or don't follow me feel free to talk about any of these that were mentioned because they were all a joy to watch some more than others obviously

other things i watched that aren't hayden/tom/mike related:

black clover

young justice

and bro black clover (anime) is SO good literally my favorite show of 2024 if you haven't watched it you need to show-wise is my favorite rn and blows these out of the water in enjoyment but that's just bc I watched it literally since like may 2024 @blackclovershowrunners SEASON 5 NEOWWW!!!?? I DONT WANT ANOTHER DANG MOVIE I WANT SEASON 5 (take ur time tho so it's good)

also for fun, here's a poll:

[5-7-9]

keeping track of the timeline of my deep dive. WARNING!!! Triggers include a fuck ton of homophobic stereotypes

Starting with the writer that hated Jason so much (Jim Starlin) that he made him more unlikable in his run in 1987 after being forced to write Jason on Neil’s behalf, first establishing the idea of Jason being an aggressive brat with anti-poverty concepts of an addicted mother and an abusive father. According to Denny O’ Neil’s perspective of fans, it worked. It was also right after the time of Frank Miller’s darker edgy version of Batman gained popularity. Jason was a symbol of that child audience, which Starlin did not want.

Starlin takes inspiration of Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns from 1986, using the plotline where Joker murders Jason and putting it into his story Death In The Family from 1988. Very unoriginal. So let’s see why Miller made Joker kill Jason.

Frank FUCKING Miller says “-Joker isn’t insane so much as satanic.” And then has the NERVE to say if he’d have casted anyone to play Joker in the Dark Knight Returns movie, he’d let it be DAVID FUCKING BOWIE?!?!? In his words, because he believes DAVID BOWIE is capable of great menace?!?!??!??!! David Bowie? The queer icon that came out in 1972? Oh hmmmm I wonder why he’d think DAVID BOWIE is a menace.

I’d like to remind people that Miller has explicitly stated Joker as “a homophobic nightmare.” Very intentional queer-coding that he has admitted to. Here’s the warning part under here

There’s also a rumor that Miller wanted Joker to explicitly admit Joker raped Jason but DC pulled it out. But Miller still implied it throughout his comic.

Wow how mysterious Joker is also implied to sexually assault Selina. It can be argued it’s not, but I wouldn’t put it past Miller’s sexist ass of all people to say so.

Judd Winink also wished to have Jason die of aids.

After the popular revival of Jason Todd, we are now forced to have a homophobic plot point be forever immortalized in canon. Now it will never go away. The edgy Frank Miller era is a stain to the current state of comics. I’d like to add that The Killing Joke was already confirmed to be a one shot, and although it has a sexist element to it, that’s on par for most comics. If anything, the story only served to make a philosophical point, like it was meant to, and dipped.

I’d also like to mention that the theory of Jason being a CSA survivor is probably a reference to Joker or the HIV PSA but i don’t like how it can be argued for both at the same time. Hence why I don’t care for the theory. The theory can go fuck itself.

Not sure how much more proof i need to bring up to prove Joker killing Jason is homophobic. But that’s all for now.

[moveslikeanape]

hey! it's been a few days again, since i still had a lot going on irl, but i'm the 🌟 anon--i thought i might as well come off anon since we've already been talking quite a bit through asks (which i didn't expect when i sent my first message haha, not that i'm complaining though). i hope you're doing well.

i agree heavily with what you said in your second paragraph. i don't know if you heard about this, but mark henn retired from disney last month, and he said on a podcast that he would've liked to stay until his 45th or 50th anniversary but ultimately his work just didn't feel meaningful anymore. and even though as i mentioned, i did enjoy encanto, i'm not really surprised. i think it says a lot about the quality of things lately that someone who worked for WDAS since 1980 and did so much important work for them would feel this way.

as for wish's songs, and specifically "at all costs", i read an interview with the songwriter the other day where she stated that she wanted that song to sound like a love song that could be played at a wedding, or a lullaby you could sing to your kids, so that when you see the movie and learn the actual context you're surprised by it. i suppose i can't say she didn't achieve her goal, but that's so far away from the purpose that songs in disney movies are supposed to serve! it just tells me that unlike phil collins or elton john, who wanted to write disney music, julia michaels just wanted to do her own thing and throw it into a disney movie whether it really worked or not.

some of the "art of" books are pretty detailed and have what i feel is a decent balance between production info and art, but others not so much... i've mostly enjoyed reading the ones i own for specifically disney movies, but the pixar art books i own tend to be very heavy on art and light on any other information. the hercules one is strange, though, because the author doesn't put much of his own writing into it, instead presenting the majority of the information by directly quoting the filmmakers, which makes it an awkward read. there are also comedic asides from the characters presented alongside lineart of them--for example, one page shows a reproduction of notes taken by one of the filmmakers, and below that is art of phil looking annoyed with text beside him that says "phil: yeesh, it's all greek to me! how am i supposed to read this chicken scratch?!". i've never seen anything like that in these kinds of books before. i did finish the art of animation book, though, and it was great! around 60 or so pages of it were dedicated entirely to the making of hercules and there were a lot of things in it that i didn't know.

to keep things on topic for your blog, i'd love to know your thoughts on the tarzan broadway show if you have any you'd like to share! i've always been a fan of broadway musicals but i don't know much about the tarzan one, other than that i remember hearing that terk was changed into a male character. which is interesting, because she was originally supposed to be a boy in the movie, wasn't she? also not the first time that's happened in a disney broadway musical, with the lion king again being an example here because of rafiki.

Hey, nice to meet you! I hope you don't mind that I followed you from my personal blog. And no worries, I completely understand life being busy… there never seems to be enough hours in the day. I'm doing well, thank you. Hope you are too!

I'd heard Mark Henn had retired, but I never heard what he said on the podcast! That's such a shame. It's hard enough watching this happen as a fan, I can't imagine being in his position.

Wow, that's completely insane about "at all costs". I'd probably be more confused than surprised, and even if I were surprised it wouldn't be a good one. And on top of that and the fact they're supposed to be written for the movie, they shouldn't be written with the intention that people would hear them before they see the movie… to me that seems like they truly did want them played on the radio, and have people want to see the movie to see what they songs about. I agree with you it seems like she just wanted to do her own thing, and also that she wants to deceive and trick her audience.

That's such a shame the Pixar books are like that. It definitely is nicer to have more info on the making of the movies. The Atlantis one is technically an "illustrated script", with a few notes here and there. Lots of great artwork, but I wish it went more in depth, especially about the Atlantean culture and language. I didn't know they did those comedic asides in the Hercules book! I've had it for years, but never actually gotten around to reading through it (really need to find some time to read through these books!) I'm glad you enjoyed the art of animation book though, and that you got to learn some new things about it!

As to the Tarzan Broadway show… I've been kicking myself for almost 20 years that I never saw it! I was in Albany on a trip during the Broadway run, but didn't have the time to make a quick side trip to see it, and been regretting it ever since. I also missed out on the production in Tuacahn, Utah last year (Josh Strickland reprised his role as Tarzan!) because I'd made a very big purchase around the time it was announced, and sadly couldn't afford to go. I did see a bootleg recording of it once, but it was so long ago I don't really remember it. Will have to rewatch it someday.

I know there were somethings that needed tweaking, but I'm not sure what could have saved it in North America. I know it's very popular in Germany (it's actually currently playing in Hamburg). Most of my experience with it is the album. I do love the new songs, especially Kerchak's "No Other Way" and Jane's "Waiting For This Moment". But my favourite has to be "Everything That I Am", when Tarzan learns about his human parents. If you only listen to one song from the broadway, I highly recommend it. The OCR has the one in the broadway sung by Josh Strickland, plus another version at the end of the album sung by Phil Collins.

One thing that's always bothered me is the song "For The First Time", a duet between Tarzan and Jane. It's basically Jane and Tarzan working through what they feel about each other and if it's reciprocated. There's nothing wrong with the song itself, I actually do love the song, it's just the subject and it's place in the musical. It comes after Strangers Like Me. In addition to the lyrics "Every gesture, every move that she makes…" etc from Tarzan, there's a new section in the song sung by Jane:

"I can't explain the way I feel Everything I wanted’s here And my heart is beating faster Every moment I’m with him I feel so complete I cannot deny what I’m feeling"

Which is sung to the same tune as "For The First Time". To me, that makes FTFT feel like going around in circles, it's basically an entire song to say what's just been said. I've always thought it would have been better to have a song where they both torn about what to do, a should I stay or should I go? song.

As for Terk, I've never read anything on why they decided to change her back into a guy. I remember thinking about Rafiki back when I first found out about Terk, they just can't keep their monkeys (apes) straight! I'll have to see if I can find out anything about that.

[castle-dominion]

c3x23 pretty dead

This is a nostalgia song for me but it was released in 2011 so it was modern at the time. Wow. W o w...

I only rly know anything abt anything bc of the movie dumpling when some fat girl & some punk feminist joined a beauty contest. This man looks like a pimp. Kind of is Nice yellow cumberbund thing Illinois? Being french is weird. I want to say illinwa but everyone else says illanoy She;s wearing interesting clothing. Wow short with your daddy. I mean we all need to get away from home! Hey! I love the emotional b plot, it's so good to see rick as a dad who loves his daughter & supports her instead of acting like the twelve year old who can score his teacher. Odds are, someone's dead.

It's not the baron is it? Beckett outfit update: Detective clothes. Double breasted trench coat looking thing tied with a fabric belt. Her shirt is sort of crazyquilted in blocks it has colours, more pink around the waist. It is a regular collared buttonup shirt. I think I've seen her in it before too, which is nice bc I like seeing continuity. Ryan outfit update: Green sweater, dress shirt, brown normal looking coat (still professional enough), I can't tell the pants or tie bc the lighting is weird. Update: it's a light purple-tinted shirt. He's aken off his jacket in the precinct & I can see it now. The shirt has really nice collars & it's actually stripy but so light u can hardly see it. Tie is green & patterned slightly, it's like diamonds but it's also because the grain of the weave changes I think, so the way the light reflects off of it makes some of them more shadowed than others. PERLMUTTER YESSS SP: Detective. Writer.

I should call my dad. I don't talk to him enough. Glad he said he didn't actually know the time, just vaguely a little before 11; tho he could have also checked. Baron called them both detectives lol I mean yeah fair to the victim first but at the same time she's dead she won't feel it. Yeah lol I love how they're filming BTS & it might actually be a good idea to keep em on Come again! Oh no wait we don't want that. She's so silly I love her.

In the elevator scene the button for floor 4 is lit. (for floor four lol.) Homicide is on the 4th floor.

Beckett was indeed a model but not a beauty queen.

I like the one cop getting a picture with a queen oh goodness this is insane. A bunch of gals who look exactly the same all milling about this stinky bullpen & entire precinct wow & that "winners never slouch" got my mom & me to straighten our posture & celebrate the fact that she wasn't one of those moms who gave her kids eating disorders KB, whispering: CASTLE. THEY'RE EVERYWHERE. JE: Beats the usual lowlifes & nutjobs  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) KB: I don't know if u can say that nut jobs and beauty queens are mutually exclusive JE: Yeah, but none of them connect to the murder. I checked the sequin against all their dresses RC: I bet you did. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) JE: & none of them are a match. KB: Okay, look at the footage from the dinner. Let's make sure that the dresses we checked are the ones they actually wore. JE: Hm. Watch a parade of beautiful women in evening attire? Yeah, I can do that. RC: I bet you can. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) KR: Hey. So, I've been interviewing these ladies-- RC: I bet you have. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) KR: -! About their alibis last night!

clipping

Castle she's probably way too young for you

This man is gay af. I'm glad it's about more than beauty & who can buy the fanciest dress. I would honestly expect to be makeup skills, dance skills, & sewing skills more than who can afford what or even stuff like social issues. It's kind of neat how it's a talent show as well as a beauty contest. I like this guy. He seems so stressed over his gal dying. Political he says, making those motions with his hands

Black sequins? It's like the wedding video. I thought they were black sequins! I just couldn't tell if it was black bc it was so shiny.

KR: For unwanted *looks to esposito* advances Esposito ryan is telling u to stop hitting on him, he's getting married. /j btw KR, eyes wide with excitement: Oh but it gets better! *hits espt gently* JE: *barely raises an eyebrow* (he would bite castle's head off if it was him) KR: *excitedly continues to explain the drama*

Ew I hate this bobby character. Man sat on the wrong side of the table ...Goddess train...???.?.?? Who wouldn't want to ride the bobby rocket? Everyone from what we hear! Boy can't even remember?

KB: this guy's dropped more pills than a three fingered pharmacist I can't believe castle took dad advice from him Esposito just had video running on beckett's computer? (btw i figured out how to put question marks on tumblr wéo relying on copy-paste: I use my french keyboard!)

Esposito has an ass

Someone would probably pawn the fiddle, not drop it down a drain. Tho pawned can lead back to u. Captions? He said right on, not all right. KB just sits in the desk espt was just at

Oh martha is so pretty! Far right! Look at her abs! What was your talent? The way I wore a sweater. Oh poor Alexis. I love the drama. Give her a hug! I'm so glad alexis has gram there.

Ok castle, you have been divorced twice, idk if your relationship advice is that good

Parallel. It's love! Montgomery is so sweet I love him! RM: If you stayed married long enough, you'd know it's hard to stay original after the first ten. BRUH. (that was good!) JE: Yeah, he was tweeting photos of his manhood along the way. *holds up fingers close together* (won clip)

KR with a nice pastel blue sweater, plus his usual attire. I don't like that accent. KB has a nice jeanjacket with those leather sleeves. You would disrespect a beautiful & expensive instrument like that? 25 is old? Your brain has barely finished developing! Drugs?

Ah nudes.

lmao I love the sticky notes they put over them RC: Well, just because you're smart and beautiful doesn't mean you have good judgment. KB: RC: I didn't mean me.

RC: Deadly action, that's a good title JE: *looks down & shakes head in exasperation* Why would the photographer pay HER for the photos? She would be paying THEM for the session, right? Also dang she's skinny.

Boy's gay voice is so strong that my little bro thought a woman was speaking. & then I went all trans on him & explained voices. I don't even know as much as I would like to tbh. I should take singing lessons (not necessarily gender affirming voice lessons)

RM: Beckett, you're a woman, right? KB, lowkey flustered: Sir, I have no idea what to get your wife! [...] RC: The best thing to give a woman is something she said she wanted when she didn't think you were listening. RM: What if I wasn't listening? RC: Gift certificate? no honey no

JE: *turns around to watch someone's booty* "Negative" Yay she's sending ryan to meet up with him finally, keep the boys together

I like how he doesn't remember the actual name but does remember it was smth similar to jerry. Already "night before last"? Mum is always confused about how the doorone remembers everything. Sus? Sure. Lack of smth regular? Maybe. Smth normal? not rly.

Keieiper XD Every guy is a creep in the eyes of the parent. Poor becket,, look at her nearly pulling her hair out. KB: It was my own private Vietnam. Our place smelled of hairspray, perfume, and cigarettes. I'm surprised that we didn't spontaneously combust.

It's ash!!! He really does love her to go see her dad at work to win her back Long distance relationships are better than they used to be. It used to be that your man goes off to make a fortune so he can marry you but then gets attacked by pirates & becomes a pirate himself & then steals you back from kidnappers, or you go away for ten months & then come back & your wife has a kid altho I might be mixing up the birth of hercules/heracles with ulyssix/odysseus & his son who I thought might be nine years old when the man was gone for ten idk it's smth like that anyways it's better to have long distance relationships these days since back then you could send letters that take ages to get to that war zone or whatever.

Ryan's the one who said "yo" this time Ew an obsessive porn wall Ew he's hanged right behind it. they didn't smell it

Peri mortem. During death, not before, not after. Before amber? Yes Before! Now can you please move? You're in my light! (Perlmutter also has an actor who needs to know where to stand to get his light) (not clipping)

By today's standards are downright tasteful! Those convenient sticky notes Girl he's on the phone, you're asking him to do work while he's on the phone? Poor Jenny. "Sorry Babey."

RC: You know I-- I hate to interfere… AC: Since when? RC: Point taken.

Nice little magnifying glass! He got it bc beckett doesn't have one Coffee <3

Y'all agreed & knew he was a cheater? Wow this is dramatic. WOAH A VASE! Who do I need to be ashamed in front of? "take care of it"???

BOBBY STARK? Course he doesn't remember.

Strawberry oil XD ok rick

Why woulld he assume one of them was lying? Didn't they all say she was great?

He was so upset! No! (Ryan & espt had better be there) Ah yes they are. Where u going? Huh?

Good work you two! *clearing throats loudly* (Ryan's square shirt love it.) Good work you folks. Rick really is a charmer isn't he? I love it when characters are in love Dancing "That gift this morning"? sounds like sex Wait, you're serious, boss? Smile, please. That's an order. (They all smile and chuckle.) RM: Hey, you kids take care, alright? (He really is the dad of the precinct) KR: What the hell did you say to him? RC: Nothing! No, I just told him to listen to what his wife wanted. JE: Damn, Castle. KB: Castle, let me let you in on a little secret. Captain Montgomery retires all the time, just give it a week or two. He's like the Brett Favre of the NYPD. Trust me. He's not going anywhere. It's just so cute, I KNOW they are just teasing him & making him think they were mad at him> & then espt still makes that move at him lol. Making him run out of the room sideways.

She will keep showing up See you tomorrow SDFHAKSJDFHDSFD

She is such a lil genius just like my bb bro. I took an extra year of highschool lol.

So yeah good episode.

[petorahs]

@vickdoom​ while i was formulating a response my brain was like. wow! it really is difficult keeping this compact without torturing myself so! why not make a new post! life is easier now lmao

i agree that the EN vas are fine and the comparisons of “sub is better than dub!!11!!1″ have all but been exhausted but yea! it really can be looked past. also jp akechi and en akechi really are like two different beings entirely and i love them both so i think either way. i would’ve liked jin anyway

The weird talk about murdering a guy actually being good for him, all things considered, WASN'T a mockery, after all, and he is just really really stupid...? 

I will admit, you lost me there! Is this about Jin at the final confrontation? Takaya was being quite insane at the end there I will admit and either really uncaring about his own teammate’s life or just straight up stupidly not thinking about the consequences but I would just chock it up to the desperation that comes with last-ditch efforts like his. and also bad writing. i barely remember anything from that part of the game tbh because i was emotional about SEES but true! i agree go off, slay king (doesnt really understand what this is about my bad) 

I've tended to think of it as maybe a way of coping with the clash between the neurotic hyper-independence and the desire to actually keep his two friends close by just considering them a extension of himself, but the cultish angle sounds very much probable!!

also that wasn’t the intent of the point i was trying to make with the first person plural of “our chidori” LMFAOO it was a bit hard to keep things in that little comment box so i think my point wasnt explained very well but thats ok!! i mostly agree with the former, not the cultish angle thing!! 

anyway on to p3 criticism :D 

( i have to preface this that if i disagree it’s not for the sake of disagreeing but rather i just like having internet discourse in a chill way y’know. like i genuinely do like to discover other people’s perspectives on media and consider them! far be it from me to “defend” p3 eventho its my fav rn in fact i’ll probably agree more than otherwise. )

first of all the comparison of eva and p3 is pretty apt LMAO i haven’t watched it myself but from what i gather. both it and p3: 1) have protags that maybe reflect the target demographic in the audience (troubled youth?) 2) timeless classic according to fans. (i agree. a lot of people still talk about both till this day) 3) themes that draw in familiarity? is that the word (biblical or greek, respectively) 4) loved to death by fans and impacted them greatly

i think, the last one, is definitely due to the emotional responses the two evoked in its audience as well as the nostalgia factor. hence, criticism on p3 (idk about eva honestly) is rarely ever talked about, which is why i prompted for your opinion, cause I really do rarely see criticism on it aside from the surface level (like p3p VS fes, ken s.link, minato’s moon s.link, is the answer good etc). 

there is a very specific set of circumstances that i got into p3 with that none of the aforementioned really applies to me. no nostalgia aside from the 2000s stuff which p4 also has, so! when you strip it all away i feel like it’s just a game with silly pacing among other flaws.

on to the vagueness of p3′s themes in comparison with its sequels, i do believe it’s due to the fact that the developers left it intentionally individualistic in order to not sound ‘preachy’. 

- HASHINO, from this interview (which i’ll be referring to down the line as well). 

there really wasn’t an end goal they set in mind, they just wanted to depict as many reactions to death as possible. 

One time, I read a magazine article that discussed the various ways in which people wished to meet their end. As you might expect, the answers were just as diverse as the people giving them… but the majority of them did agree on one point: they wished to die surrounded by loved ones. -HASHINO

except for one: the message in p3 seems to lie in its social links, and that to die surrounded by loved ones, or rather knowing you impacted them positively, is “the answer”.

now far be it from me to take anything this man says too seriously since his direction of the persona games, while generally good, have so much dissonance in them sometimes with its themes that its almost painful (seen in p5 most recently). also in this same interview he says 'I’ve never successfully forged a true friendship with a girl in real life.’ and like.

hmmm on the ryoji and shinjiro bit. frickkkkk i never even pictured shinjiro in that same way i view ryoji now that you mention it,,,, this is a great depiction of the “dissonance” between themes I was talking about. although I don’t completely understand the “healthy and content millionaire raised by a loving father” part you mentioned suddenly, i think this is about takaya (strega) VS mitsuru (SEES) is it? cant say it’s about shinji and ryoji since the only thing we know about ryo’s parents is that they never existed. i wouldn’t super call the late kirijo father as outwardly “loving” either. i think i need more context on this LOL if you dont mind.

kirijo group’s unsavory practices have always been out in the open like that yeah, and no one says a thing cause i guess rich = OK and mitsuru is a baddie so = also OK. yukari tries to call her and kirijo as a whole out on it but it’s always with the underlying message of “yukari’s just jealous of mitsu” that gets resolved as soon as yukamitsu’s personal problems do. imo, i sort of liked that the kirijo group wasnt exactly a saintly company cause lbr what companies even are, but their current actions really are just reprehensible to say the least and don’t reflect their “change in ways”, that i can agree with.  

now, if i were to rank the closeness of modern persona game’s main casts with eachother it’d look like p4 > p5 >p3. SEES don’t get along with eachother, this is a given. and i do think it was intentional on the game dev’s parts as seen here: 

SEES are functionally colleagues with lives outside of eachother. i noticed them being referred to as “friends” during May, yes, but I noticed that only when I wanted to select yukari or junpei in the shrine fortunes, or during Fool Arcana rank ups which are semantics the game has to play by to just, get the point across to the player. they are “friends” in the same way we’d refer to our college classmates as friends, but once semester break rolls around we tend to hang out with other people, right? that’s what SEES are to eachother, at first. also, if we go by the RP-ing as the MC aspect that persona tends to do, then it’s most certainly not just ‘the game’ referring to them as friends but rather the MC seeing them as such. and i dont know, it’s a nice characterization for minato and minako to me -- seeing their dormmates as friends when they dont necessarily feel the same yet. its like they want to be close. 

i have to respectfully disagree about the nuance thing as well. interestingly, even the most diehard p3 fan from what i’ve seen sometimes shares your views as well. case in point, yukari being hostile in ‘the answer’ when she supposedly went through character development already in ‘the journey’, which i presented my disputation for here. this, coupled with the junpei thing you mentioned... i think it’s brilliant! call it bad writing, but honestly. to be real. humans make the same mistake over and over before they finally get it. i know i did. especially as a 16-17 teen. these characters are in different contexts most of the time which makes them react in somewhat same ways. 

let’s take junpei again as an example. at the monorail he expresses his jealousy, gets over it. during june/july, he gets jealous again, but worse, and this time he doesnt get over it too much until he meets chidori (someone he wants to have lean on him). during that time between the problem and meeting chidori, he hands a quick apology to MC, but that just marks another pivot where instead of taking it out on MC, he takes it out on himself self-deprecatingly. he knows that his problem is himself now -- that’s development to me. and lastly, his conflict with the MC comes out during the climax when he blames them for the shadows, and everything that’s happened. for making their lives hell. understandably, its a hotheaded response to have in that situation. i could see a past teen boy me that would react somewhat the same. but that is not the same as his petty jealousy anymore.  all three are still dickish moves, but when we look at it, all three are pretty different contexts? feel free to prove me wrong but i see it as pretty in-line with what we know of junpei tbh. 

nothing to do about tartarus im afraid <3 im the type to be okay with grindy gameplay at a modicum myself and i haaaaaated exploring when i first played p3. i almost dropped it actually (so glad i didnt) but yeah. i definitely prefer p5′s main gameplay module, and i wouldn’t mind trading the slog of two hundred+ floors for something more mementos-like. 

that’s the spirit! i hope you enjoy p3 one day as much as i do :”) again, i hope this is less of me defending my favorite persona game so much as me just idk. wanting to share good parts of it despite understanding its flaws (i still think the pacing is ass even now). i do mostly agree with your points. have a good day!! (thank u if you read this far oh gosh). 

I feel like the main problem with how Strega (Takaya and Jin, at least) are written is just about the game desperately wanting them to remain excessively unlikable until after they are defeated, which is…bizarre and unnecessary, to say the least. They are never actually doing anything of importance, so the narrative relies on "dehumanizing" them into stock villains, to give the players some reason to dislike or, at least, oppose them on a personal level, hence the lack of meaningful characterization. Jin's November comment about SEES "not having a clue what will happen if the Dark Hour disappears", impliedly being about the memory wipeout, since Takaya told them outright they would lose their powers earlier, is the perfect example of this, imo. He gets cut off mid-sentence, so he doesn't spoil it for later, naturally, but it's never brought up again, after eventually being reveled by Ryoji, because that is actually a pretty solid reason for them to antagonize the protagonists (imagine waking up on the streets, with no personal documents, feeling awfully sick and wondering why no one is looking for you!) but, again, they are yet to be defeated and not meant to come off as even remotely sympathetic until then. It's just very…unskillful writing. Sorry for the long message, btw, I initially just wanted to leave a regular comment, actually, but there's just so many words it apparently wouldn't fit in less than five separate responses 😵‍💫

yoooo thanks for the input. thats also a really good way of looking at it! the game needing to make them unlikeable pretty much explains things. it just ends up being really goofy. which is a shame because they really do have great backstories that remain largely unexplored.

Jin's November comment about SEES "not having a clue what will happen if the Dark Hour disappears", impliedly being about the memory wipeout, since Takaya told them outright they would lose their powers earlier

honestly? i never made this connection myself so thanks for telling me! i could see that being true and i'm about to hit that point in my replay game soon myself so i can look at it with this context. question is how could jin have possibly have known this info... my guess is ikutsuki could have fed them that info since he also supplied them with his suppressant drugs, plus they even knew about the Ruin thing that Nyx could have brought about. honestly, including ikutsuki the "antagonists" of p3 are an interesting bunch with how much potential they have that's not really explored but i guess thats just a hashino persona game thing.

also i just think between them and ikutsuki i def see strega having more sympathetic light being shone on them since they were the direct victims of old kirijo's depravity. out of all the kids, only they survived? your comment about them "not having any personal documents" just strikes me as so fcked up. damn. hope it changes a bit in reload.

[foolhearts]

☕ Seb and Lewis before Baku 2017?

WOW what an incredibly loaded ask!! you're right we don't talk about pre baku seb/lewis enough even though they have 10+ years of history before baku even happened... i wish i had a detailed timeline. we could dedicate an entire museum to their relationship.

i previously answered an ask about baku being the turning point on their relationship so i won't focus on that except to say the fact that seb says "we were not best friends" makes me crazy. ofc maybe he really means in that immediate post crash moment and it is very evident they're even closer now, but i would like to know how he defines their pre baku relationship bc let's consider the evidence shall we?

so they've been racing against each other since they were teenagers. which is not unusual in f1! but does everyone look at their rival like this? look at their smiles!! the way they look in each other's eyes like nobody else matters! they've been looking at each other this way for years. they have their way of walking together :)

should we talk about how lewis always says he has a terrible memory yet can remember all his battles his podiums his memories with seb no matter how long ago it was? like when they were babies in f3 at zandvoort in 2005?

in formula 1, their first shared podium was suzuka 2009. since then, they've shared a podium SO MANY TIMES and they always look so happy as they flirt and spray champagne. it's all about the delight on their faces at these dumb intricate rituals. and some of their celebrations... obscene. how much champagne have they poured on each other? how many times have their hands touched? can we even count the amount of times they've congratulated each other, celebrated with each other, shared in each other's important moments? thinking about it makes me insane. they should just kiss already.

speaking of podiums, i laugh everytime i think about the time they excluded nico from their photo. it kinda looks like lewis is the one who makes seb take the photo!!! and way nico walks off dejectedly... it's so good. i love all the b*tchy lewis and seb moments. like them mocking the hat throwing incident right in front of nico!!

and then there's the flirting... this exchange about seb's hands when they're doing the hand imprints for the 2014 japanese gp. excuse me seb??? "you know what they say about men with small hands"??? seems like seb is offering to show lewis the answer...

they have such a long history of making everyone feel like a third wheel during press conferences!!! like when they teased valtteri about the finnish word for excited but it was really just an excuse to flirt!! also how many selfies does lewis have? i'd die to see his seb album.

ok i need to wrap it up with a few key moments:

remember malaysia 2015? i honestly could cry thinking about it. them just sitting on the podium together, touching shoulders and feet. seb is overwhelmed with tears of joy after getting his first win with ferrari. and lewis stays there by his side. this whole gifset is so much but the bottom right kills me. lewis's content smile as he watches seb... sharing this huge moment TOGETHER!

then canada 2016... there is SO MUCH in this race. it's the flirting in the cooldown room and saying "i enjoyed chasing you down" and seb asking if lewis noticed his start. i cannot. they both have it SO BAD. and seb's praise kink is showing. and as noted this is the seagulls incident!! seb just leaves his own interview to come and tease lewis about not braking for seagulls. with a lot of touching.

inspector seb apparently touching lewis's car and then they joke about it!! again the flirting and the touching... truly deranged behavior

lastly let us not forget lewis defending seb's honor against jack whitehall. you tell him lewis!!! seb IS very funny!!!

ok i hope you enjoyed my thesis about seb and lewis pre baku 2017. in conclusion, they have SO MUCH HISTORY and evidence points to them being in love way before the baku incident even happened.

[kenmaskitten10]

Dilf Deku Headcanons

Midoriya Izuku x GN!Reader

warnings: swearing, NSFW themes (nothing graphic just briefly mentioned),brief mention of bullying/scars, idk this is pretty tame nothing is really described... if u don't like dilfs then don't read this :)

a/n: okay! this is my first time writing/publishing anything on Tumblr so please go easy on me haha... I've had ridiculous Deku brain rot lately and I decided I had to jot a few thoughts down. I'm playing with the idea of turning this into a writing blog, but I am undecided! If anyone wants to thirst for one Izuku Midoriya please come talk to me please anyway without further ado here are some Dilf!Deku hcs.... I'm playing around with doing a NSFW version after this so if you would like to see that let me know!

w/c: 1,498

Okay everyone today I want to talk about Dilf!Izuku

This may be controversial but I personally believe that he has the most Dilf potential out of any of the class 1A boys and no I will not be taking criticism at this time

Sorry but even when he’s younger he has Dilf energy - he’s caring, considerate, takes your feelings into account like a dad he just wants to take care of his baby

oh fuck this man no no no

And listen, here me out on this one….. he has more dilf potential than Bakugo and allow me to tell you why

We can all agree that Bakugo has been confident his entire life, so of course he’s going to be confident when he’s older?? duh

But IZUKU is a different story altogether, he’s never felt confident in his life

His whole childhood he was looked down on for being quirkless, and bullied by someone he thought was his friend kachaan

THEN he got a quirk but oh every time he uses it it breaks all his fucking bones and leaves him with all these scars, and he appreciates them because of what they represent but also he’s young when he gets them, he’s already prone to insecurity and when he’s younger ESPECIALLY i think they just remind him of previous failures

He only started to gain a little bit of confidence in his UA days, but it takes time to rebuild yourself after you’ve been torn down for so long, so I honestly imagine he doesn’t even feel an inkling of confidence until his third year or later and even then, it’s new, it’s unfamiliar, he doesn’t totally know how to act

Because yes, by his third year, he’s starting to realize, oh wow okay, I have an incredible quirk and all these new abilities that I can control better, and wow people are paying attention for good reasons , because he’s tall and attractive, probably cuts his hair undercut Izuku supremacy and he’s made some solid friends who help boost his confidence too

But despite all this, deep down he still feels like that quirkless little kid who has to work three times as hard as anyone else and still doesn’t get the recognition he deserves

But OH BOY

DILF IZUKU??? This man is dripping with confidence

he’s older now. he’s overcome a lot. he’s gone to therapy, and worked his way through the pro hero ranks until he earned his number one spot fair and square, that’s something no one can take away from him

He’s loaded now (see below because I go on a whole tangent), he has nice tasteful style that can only come with age and experience

He knows he’s hot now, because its simply no longer something that can be denied, anyone with eyes can see how attractive he is

If he catches you staring at him, he doesn’t shy away. His cheeks might tint slightly, but he stares right back with the biggest smirk on his face. “See something you like, angel?”

Probably finds reasons to show off slightly but he’s Dilf!Izuku so it’s subtle, it’s meant just for you and god does it drive you crazy

The way he’ll reach for and grab at things when he’s around you because he knows you like his hands (he wants to hold your bags and please let him he just wants to feel needed)

They way he stands behind you while you cook, or work, or read…. He sees you sitting or standing so peacefully and he’ll come up behind you to check out what it is you’re doing. He’ll lean down slowly, quietly, stopping when his breath is on your neck and your nose is filled with his scent, and take a quick peek at whatever it is you’re working on. It takes you a moment to turn around, your heart starting to beat faster in your chest due to his looming presence behind you (I DON’T KNOW WHY THIS IS HOT TO ME IT JUST IS OKAY). When you finally turn to face him, his face breaks into a small smile of victory as his strong hand catches your jaw in a gentle grip and he places an achingly soft kiss to your lips before saying “You look so cute when you’re concentrating,”. As you’re about to go in for another, he lets you go and stands up again, his eyes twinkling. “No no, you’re working so hard baby, don’t let me distract you,” WHEN ALL HE WANTED WAS TO DISTRACT YOU and he succeeded and now you’re all hot and bothered, with no hope of resuming what you were doing

Dilf Deku is a tease I know he is but it’s okay he’ll make it up to you later ;)

He’s got shorter, slightly more cropped hair with grey mixed in with the green, his face more lean and angular… not to mention years of pro hero work have toned his body into an absolute work of art I’m gonna pass out just thinking about it

Freckles splashed across his skin like hundreds of little constellations, accented by scars and marks from old wounds (which he’s come to appreciate - they show how hard he’s worked, how much he’s sacrificed to get to where he is now) he’s muscular but I don’t think he’s quite as big as All Might (his fighting style is a lot different so of course he would build muscle in different places) so this means LEGS LEGS LEGS

LEG MUSCLES FOR DAYS

THICK FUCKING THIGHS oh my god

And holy shit his back muscles too WHEW sometimes in the morning when he gets up before you, you watch him sit on the edge of the bed and flex his shoulders and arms to stretch out in the hazy morning light and Jesus Christ

Dilf Deku is older now, he’s spent his entire life working himself too hard and he missed out on a lot of the fun, impulsive, chaotic things young people do, so I think he wants to let loose a little in his older age, have some fun for once

And what’s more perfect than sweet, youthful, tantalizing little you to indulge in ?

He’s so doting, just wants to make you feel special and cared for

And on that note, if you will indulge me for a moment

he’s fucking RICH like

He’s the number one pro hero, he has brand deals on brand deals on brand deals

And I don’t mean to slander All Might and Endeavor, but in terms of a hot, fuckable number one pro hero, Deku has them beat by a landslide so I imagine he has a wider range of brand deals too, because he can sell the sex appeal angle

I mean can you imagine him in interviews? Interacting with fans? Confident yes, but still soft spoken and kind, almost gentle but anyone can tell he’s completely in control, of himself, of the interview, of the audience, this man has the entire country world wrapped around his little finger

All this to say he’s DRIPPING WITH MONEY

he’s like the guy that overtips an OBSCENE amount like if the waiter is really nice he’ll tip like $300 dollars and won’t even blink (I know they don’t tip at restaurants in Japan but this is more for vibes yk)

sugar daddy deku isn’t a stretch it’s a REALITY

Y’all can be officially together or not, either way Deku loves to spoil his precious little y/n

All you have to do is smile sweetly and ask, and he’s absolute putty in your hands

Complies with even the most egregious of your demands, because hey, he has the money to spare, and how could he say no when you look so cute asking so politely?

GOOD TASTE too like he has a lot of money but he knows how to spend it 😏

Additionally he’s, ya know, him, so he’s insanely charitable and donates to charities, go fund me, personal Venmo accounts of fans that need it

if a fan has like a go fund me for some reason that catches his eye, he’s going to donate and he’s going to donate a lot (A LOT)

he doesn’t even do it for the press, he does it bc he’s a good person but my GOD the press eats it up and so do the fans

These hc’s are so self indulgent but all this to say

Dilf!Deku gets what he wants when he wants it and no one is standing in his way

So when he decides it’s you he wants? Well then it’s you he’s going to get!